Gabriel: What was it that you two were doing last night?
Crowley and Aziraphale: NOTHING!
Gabriel: Whatever it was, it looked like Aziraphale was winning.
132 notes
·
View notes
Crowley: Do you want to play 20 Questions?
Aziraphale: Sure!
Aziraphale: Whats your favorite color?
Crowley, laser fucking focused: Triangle. Do you love me?
20K notes
·
View notes
[Season 2 summed up]
Aziraphale's thoughts: Oh I shall team up with Crowley and make Nina and Maggie fall in love and make them confess. Oh what if I also confess then. I need to prepare everything to set the scene.
Still Aziraphale's thoughts: Ooohh a ball with dancing and tiny snacks to make it fancy and it will be like a Jane Austen novel coming to life and then I will ask Crowley to dance and all our problems will go away as I stare into his eyes....
Crowley's thoughts: Keep Aziraphale safe Keep Aziraphale safe Keep Aziraphale safe Keep Aziraphale safe FUCK YOU GABRIEL Keep Aziraphale safe Keep Aziraphale safe Keep Aziraphale safe PLEASE HOLD MY HAND AZIRAPHALE Keep Aziraphale safe JANE AUSTEN WAS AN AUTHOUR?!?! Keep Aziraphale safe-
5K notes
·
View notes
there's a very thin line between bodyguard boyfriend and trophy wife and Crowley is balancing on it like a goddamn funambulist
3K notes
·
View notes
i think it's really funny when people describe Crowley's hair as silky or soft or something along those lines in fics, because if you look at David Tennant closely, you can see they used like 50 hair products on his hair to sculpt that shit to perfection. it's probably hard as a rock or stickier than glue. i want a fic where it's like:
Crowley rests his head on Aziraphale's chest, snuggling close. The angel smiles and raises his hand to stroke his hair, but once his fingers are buried in those shiny red locks, they're trapped in a crunchy sea of slick goop. The slimy texture sticks to his fingers like superglue. He tries to pull his hand back, but it's completely stuck. Not even three consecutive miracles can do the trick. He prays for salvation.
4K notes
·
View notes
*at a zoo*
Crowley: What are they in for?
Aziraphale: Crowley, this isn't prison.
Crowley: So they can leave?
Aziraphale: No, but-
Crowley, pointing at a meerkat: I bet that one murdered someone.
8K notes
·
View notes