Tumgik
#incorrect damian wayne
sodamnbored · 17 days
Text
Damian, entering the living room: Oh, Drake. I didn’t realise you were here too.
Tim, distracted on his phone on the couch: Yeah, best WiFi around. Keeping busy?
Damian, looking in cupboards and chandeliers for acrobatic older brothers: Looking for Dick.
Tim absently, not looking up from Grindr: Mm, me too.
4K notes · View notes
deleteoldpeople · 3 months
Text
This is a continuation of my last post, since y’all loved it so much.
If Damian jokes about hell, do you think he would joke about going back? I do.
Tim: Oh he’s going to hell for sure.
Damian: How unfortunate, I’ll meet him again.
Tim: …damian, no.
Jason: *To a criminal* When you get to hell, tell em’ I sent you.
Damian: And ask if they still have those whips, I really want one.
Jason:…. what?
Dick: Damian stop joking about hell, it’s not funny, just distrubing.
Damian: I know someone who would appreciate my humor.
Dick: Oh yeah? Who?
Damian: Satan
Dick: *Uncontrollable sobbing*
They’ll literally have to ban the word “hell”, or any relating words in order not to provoke him 💀
1K notes · View notes
Text
Jason, singing to the tune of I Kissed a Girl: I killed a guy, and I liked it- Dick, whispering: Should we call the exorcist? Tim, also singing: The taste of his cherry chapstick. Damian, appalled: Call the exorcist.
7K notes · View notes
Text
jason: i'm damian wayne’s emergency contact
nurse: so, you're here to pick him up?
jason: i'm here to be removed as his emergency contact
3K notes · View notes
lilylovelyxo · 1 year
Text
*Thug rips off Damian’s Domino Mask*
Y/S/N, speaking lowly: “Pick that up, apologize, and leave. Please. For your own good.”
Thug: “I will do no such thing.”
Damian, cracks knuckles: “You should have left when you could have left.”
Red Hood: “Everyone who's got a knife grab it! It's a fight to the death!”
1K notes · View notes
cardinalcheerio · 10 days
Text
Tim and Damian putting on the batsuit for whatever reason:
Damian: I should be on your shoulders! My face resembles fathers better!
Tim: your face resembles a 4 year olds
151 notes · View notes
Text
Bruce: I'll give you 20$ to stay longer.
Jason: How long?
Bruce: Just a few hours.
Jason:
Jason: Deal.
Damian: I'll give you 40$ to leave RIGHT now.
1K notes · View notes
Text
Damian, carrying a box: What would you say if- if I, hypothetically, came home with 7 kittens one day?
Bruce: …
Bruce: What’s in the box?
Damian: What woul-
Bruce: Damian, what’s in the box?
Damian: I think you know.
295 notes · View notes
Text
Dick Grayson: *running towards Damian with open arms*
Damian Wayne: *moves out of the way*
Dick Grayson: Hey, why'd you move?!
Damian Wayne: I thought you were going to attack me.
Dick Grayson: I was going to hug you!
Damian Wayne: (genuinely confused) Why would you hug me?
Dick Grayson: WHY WOULD I ATTACK YOU!?
189 notes · View notes
incorrect-dc-qoutes · 10 months
Text
Tim: What’s something you guys are better than Jason at?  Damian: Mario Kart. Dick: Yeah, video games. Harley: Emotional vulnerability.
164 notes · View notes
bluejay-the-geek · 11 months
Conversation
Ancient
Damian, picking a Gray Ghost CD up: This looks ancient.
Bruce, reading the date on it: What? No, Its only-
Bruce: 30 YEARS OLD?!?
Bruce: I remember seeing this in theaters...
195 notes · View notes
deleteoldpeople · 6 months
Text
Do you think Damian jokes about his time in hell? I do.
*Chaos from all the bat-kids together under the same roof for Christmas”
Damian: This is reminiscent of the time where I went to underworld
*Chaos paused*
Jason: Please, that’s as narrow of a chance as Damian making it to heaven.
Damian: He’s right, and I didn’t make it to heaven, so that should tell you something.
Jason: *Horrified*
Tim: Guys my friends are coming over.
Damian: It’d be a cold day in hell if you have friends, I would know.
Tim:…
I feel like he would know that it would make the batfam uncomfortable, but he would still continue to go to do it for their reactions.
1K notes · View notes
Text
Damian: Ew. What kind of tea is this? Tim: I boiled Gatorade. Jason: Dude what the actual-
113 notes · View notes
Text
tim: what are you writing?
damian: the government wants to know what kind of weapons we have in the house. i'm letting them know it's private information
tim, looking over damian's shoulder: this just says 'fuck around and find out' in calligraphy
2K notes · View notes
lilylovelyxo · 1 year
Text
*Batboys lost a present from Bruce to their Mom*
Collective groaning
Damian panicked: “What are we gonna do?”
Dick: “Uh, okay. What can we do? We, uh, we put a different ring in the box and voilà.”
Tim: “We don’t have another ring, Dick.”
Jason: “Okay, so, we, uh, we, we stage a burglary and in the struggle we stab Bruce. But just a little, and Mom is so glad he’s alive that she forgets about the anniversary.”
Damian: “I mean, I love that, but maybe for some other time.
Jason: “Christmas.”
924 notes · View notes
cardinalcheerio · 1 year
Text
Damian: I am the favorite, since i am the biological son.
Tim: if anything that means Bruce wad forced to take you in! He chose us!
Damian: He hardly chose you, you just pestered him enough to the point where he allowed you to stay!
Jason: come on guys it's clear I'm the favorite. *glances from the rest of the bat boys* fine, atleast im Alfreds favorite. If anyone its dickface
Dick: *offended hand on chest* its not a competition! if it were id win *under his breath*
Loud arguing issues, including all of them tackling eachother claiming to be the favorite. Jason is just there for fun*
491 notes · View notes