Tumgik
#incorrect crossover quotes
Text
Ruby: Fine, I still can't swim! I never took those lessons at the community pool.
Kim: Ruby, you promised!
Ruby: They wanted to put me in the beginner class with the little kids! I can't be swimming around with a bunch of five year olds! They can be so cruel when they sense weakness...
Ben: That's why on the first day, you have to beat up the biggest one in the yard!
Kim: Ben, that's prison.
Ben: Only if you let it be.
-------------------------------------------------------
Ruby: I have HRE (Hopeless Romantic Energy)
Steven: I have HRE (Holy Roman Empire)
Ash: Hambu Rg Er
-------------------------------------------------------
Kim: Ash, Ben, I love y'all and all, but can I ask what in the hell you are doing?
Ben, trying to stabilize a tower of folding chairs that Ash is sitting atop: Nothing.
Ash: I love you too :-)
12 notes · View notes
fandomsarefamily1966 · 11 months
Text
If you're ever scared that you're not a good person, remember that bad people don't care about getting better.
Luz, to Steven
66 notes · View notes
onikiribattousai · 1 year
Text
Hoozuki: Dear Enma-sama, give me patience.
Sebastian: I think you mean "give me strength".
Hoozuki: If Enma-sama gave me strength, you'd be dead by now, Michaelis.
26 notes · View notes
zombieplaguedoc · 1 year
Text
America: Hey Tord, cous?
Tord: *Shoots a picture of Tom as target practice* Yeah?
America: I'm still the hero, right?
Tord:
Tord: *looks at Rattlesnake Jake who comes back in from a hit and sets both his pistols on the table with a slam, then at SCP 049 who is in the process of curing someone in a spare room, then at Lady Dimitrescu who is chasing Ethan Winters around, swinging her claws at him and hitting him, then at Canada who is cleaning blood off his hockey stick, then back at America*
Tord:.....Sure?
3 notes · View notes
zylev-blog · 20 days
Text
Danny and Jazz were forced to go to a gala with Vlad. During the gala, the Joker and Harley Quinn decided to prey on the rich.
Danny: Quick, Jazz, make a distraction.
Jazz: *immediately turning to the person beside her* I was just thinking how I would make the perfect American president based upon my skill set, dance ability, and bloodlust.
Dick, who was trying to slip out of the room: *intrugued* how does your dance ability make you a good president?
Jazz: I am so glad you asked.
Ten minutes later, she manages to distract Dick, Damian, and Steph. Bruce is not happy about this.
3K notes · View notes
the-b1ah · 14 days
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Part 1 of you can’t bench me!
Context:
Phantom and Red Hood have now been seen patrolling together pretty frequently. Ever since Phantom was introduced to the batfam he also pops over to say hi to the others.
They haven’t seen him in a couple days but Red Hood doesn’t seem worried though he won’t answer anyones questions.
———
Phantom: I just wanted some ✨✨me time
Spoiler: BULLSHIT!
Red Robin: red hood def benched his ass to do school. Watch out he’s turning into B
Spoiler: ha! Soon we’ll catch hoodie running around in bat ears saying shit like “I am the night ”
———
RR to phantom: quit your school join my emo vigilante gang (young justice)
—-
The origin | part 2
2K notes · View notes
l3viat8an · 3 months
Text
MC: I want to fuck an angel!
Solomon: A hot one?
MC: Yes!
Solomon: An angel we know?
MC: Yes!
Solomon: Simeon?
MC: Yes~
Solomon: I understand.
MC:….
Solomon: Do you want to fuck an angel or do you want to fuck God?
MC: Can you fuck god??
Solomon: Oh yes.
2K notes · View notes
mylifeisfruk4ever · 8 months
Text
Dick: Ehi B, there’s this someone I really like...
Bruce: Mhm. Anyone would be lucky to have you, my son.
————
Damian: I think I might be in love.
Bruce: Make sure to take Dick with you as a chaperone.
Damian: Father!
————
Bruce: Please, just, FIND someone. I can’t believe your only love was a jacket!
Jason: Not true. I have another love.
Bruce Really?
Jason: GUNS!
Bruce: *Facepalm*
————
Tim: Bruce, I and Kon...
Bruce: I FORBID YOU FROM DATING UNTIL YOU’RE THIRTY!
Tim: WHAT!?
2K notes · View notes
MC meets their male version!
#1
Something happened with one of the doors in Barbatos's room and. M!MC (male MC) ended up walking in this devildom where's our F!MC/GN!MC is.
Tumblr media
Lucifer: .......so you're saying he basically travelled universe accidentally, because of your mistake.
Barbatos: it wasn't my mistake, the other Barbatos made the mistake
Lucifer: and now you want me to keep him here, with our mc?? Did Diavolo even approved it!?!
Barbatos: he was the one who suggested it, yes.
Lucifer: ...ugh *facepalms*
MC: *looking at M!MC with squinting eyes*
M!MC: *doing the same*
M!MC: ........ask away..
Mc: how big is that peni-
M!MC: that's the first thing you ask? ......Not surprised.
M!MC: I'll tell you , if you tell me your bra siz-
MC: Deal.
M!MC: Deal.
Barbatos:
Lucifer:
Barbatos: .... I'll see if I can fix it up till tomorrow.
Lucifer: please.
Tumblr media
[A/N]: this is gonna be a series ......maybe :p
Common tag that used: MMC x MC (use this tag to find more)
Also I'm close to hitting 1k!! Thank you all!! Muwah :3
757 notes · View notes
badingsm · 7 months
Text
*avengers playing truth or dare in tony's party*
peter: miss y/n, truth or dare?
y/n: uh, truth..?
tony, drunk: boo! such a weakling!
nat, glaring at him: shut the fuck up, tincan!
peter, nervous for no reason: so, if you were given a chance to be someone else in our team, who would you be and why?
y/n, clapping excitedly: oh, oh! wanda! wanda—i want to be wanda!
wanda, smirking: and why is that?
y/n with love eyes: she can visit other universes! i want to see lena luthor-danvers! she and supergirl are married, i know, but god, i would fucking kneel for that woman, and i'll do everything she says and-
nat, jealous, scoffing: your wife *points at herself* is literally sitting beside you, and just to inform you, baby, she hears you loud and clear, and she's quite offended because you can't even listen to her when she asks you to do something, and now you're saying these stuffs?! where's the equality in that?!
y/n, smiling hesitantly: well, yeah, i still love you though, tasha! don't worry, love.
wanda, chuckling: ...well, i could still take you to their universe and go visit mrs. luthor-danvers if that's what you-
nat, frowning: oh, shut it, maximoff!
y/n, laughing: my baby's a green-eyed monster..
1K notes · View notes
hugsandchaos · 9 months
Text
Dc x Dp
There’s a short video of a scare prank and there’s two guys being scared. One bolts off running, notices his buddy is frozen in place, goes back, picks him up, and keeps running. I keep seeing that as Danny and Tucker or a coworker of Danny encountering Bruce Wayne knowing his adoption addiction.
Bruce: *turns the corner*
Danny and Tucker: !!!
Tucker: *turns around and runs*
Danny: ...
Bruce: Is your friend alri--
Tucker: *runs back, picks up Danny, and fucking sprints*
2K notes · View notes
Text
Kim: We just ate, why are you making pancakes?
Ash: Oh, they're for the Pokémon!
Kim: Why are you making pancakes for the Pokémon?
Ash, slightly offended: They don't know how!
-------------------------------------------------------
Ruby: (traps a cockroach under a cup)
Ben: (puts two more cups next to the cup)
Ruby, in tears: Please... don't...
Ben: (starts shuffling the cups)
Ruby: NOOO-
-------------------------------------------------------
Kim: Ben can I speak to you for a minute? In private.
Ben: Oohh! Someone's in trouble!
Kim:
Ash:
Steven:
Ruby:
Ben: It's me. I don't know why I did that.
10 notes · View notes
fandomsarefamily1966 · 11 months
Text
Luz: You know, being stuck in another world sure does bring out some interesting stuff in me.
Anne: You mean like your survival instincts?
Luz: ...
Anne: You mean like your survival instincts, right?
10 notes · View notes
onikiribattousai · 2 years
Text
Kusuriuri: Sebastian, I have a question
Sebastian: What is it ?
Kusuriuri: Can a human child breathe inside a washing machine while it's still running?
Sebastian:
Sebastian: Kusuriuri, where's Bocchan?
45 notes · View notes
mazelicious · 9 months
Text
Criminal Minds is wild cause they'll give Emily Prentiss insane chemistry with everyone except her boyfriend
1K notes · View notes
zylev-blog · 22 days
Text
*Casually in the Middle of a High Stakes/Dangerous Situation*
Danny: How do you eat pickles?
Dick: What do you mean?
Danny: I mean, there's a whole process. It's not like you can grab them from the jar with your hand, because it's cold and the juice burns if you have a cut, plus, it's pretty unsanitary. And you can't use a spoon because you'll have to scoop it out, and it'll be way too difficult to grab more than three or four without taking 10 minutes along with half the brine in the jar, even if it's one with holes.
Dick: Yeah, that's why you use a fork.
Danny B: Okay, sure, but what if you don't have one of the big ones clean? It's weird to use a small one. But there is always one of those smaller sharp knives clean.
Dick: But the straight edge doesn't really fit the cylindrical shape, and you have to make sure you don' t break it, it's too much work.
Dick: It makes me feel like I deserve the pickles though. Like, "Yeah, I did it. That's right. Good job me." It's empowering. But even after that, it's not like you can use a bowl.
Danny: I get that, it's not ascetically pleasing.
Dick: Exactly! And it looks weird if you don't entirely fill the bowl, but you also can't eat that many. My solution: Use a mug.
Danny: *Nods in agreement*
Jason: That is all very interesting, BUT WE'RE TRYING NOT TO DIE RIGHT NOW! USE YOUR LIMITED ATTENTION SPANS AND FOCUS!
Danny: Jeez, okay.
Dick: Quit yelling at us already.
964 notes · View notes