Some more Aequitas as Incorrect Quotes
Using the lovely incorrect quote generator
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MC to the squad: And remember, if I get harsh with you it is only because you’re doing it all wrong.
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Sebastian: The best person I know is myself.
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Vesper: I'm not funny, I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking.
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MC: I think I'm falling for you.
Rowan: Then get up.
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Juni: I wouldn’t put it in those words exactly.
MC: Why not?
Juni: Because I don't know what they mean.
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Leon: Hey Nora, do you have any hobbies?
Nora: Swimming..
Leon: Really? That’s cool. I never expected you to-
Nora: In a pool of self hatred and regret.
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Sebastian: I need life advice.
Vesper, sipping Gatorade and eating cookie dough: You came to the right person.
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Juni: So, Nora, do you have a crush on anyone?
Nora: The only crush I have is this crushing anxiety.
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MC: Jasper isn't talking to me.
Rowan: Enjoy it while it lasts.
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Jasper: We’re playing Scrabble. It’s a nightmare.
Zoe: Scrabble? Scrabble’s great.
Jasper: Not when you’re playing with Alex, it’s not. She puts words like “ephemeral” and I put “dog.”
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Rowan: I have the sharpest memory here - name one time I forgot something!
Jasper: You left me, MC, and Zoe in a Walmart parking lot at 2am a day ago.
Rowan: I did that on purpose, try again.
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Zoe: Why are MC and Jasper sitting with their backs to each other?
Alex: They had a fight.
Zoe: Then why are they holding hands?
Alex: They get sad when they fight.
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Leon: I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan.
Vesper: We could attack them with hummus.
Leon: I stand corrected.
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Leon: You know what’s funny about Vesper? They’re my best friend, and anyone who’d hurt them is someone I’d murder, probably.
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Sebastian: Juniper, we tried things your way.
Juni: No, we didn't.
Sebastian: I did it in my head and it didn't work.
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Vesper: The only thing I'm guilty of is being adorable... ...and also assault with a deadly weapon.
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Vesper: My gender is in a constant state of flux.
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Alex: What do you call disobeying the law?
The Team: A hobby.
Alex: *crosses their arms*
The Team: That we as heroes do not engage in.
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Sebastian/Rowan: All of your existences are confusing.
The Team: How so?
Sebastian/Rowan: Your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to any of you upsets me.
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Juni, opening a Capri Sun: Guess I'll drink my sorrows away.
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Vesper: Blackmail is such an ugly word. I prefer extortion. The X makes it sound cool.
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Vesper: I am not a lunatic. I have the psychiatric report to prove it. A slender majority of the panel decided in my favour.
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Juni: Well, needless to say. Uh-oh Spaghetti-os.
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Vesper: I was born for politics. I have great hair and I love lying.
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Character A (to C): You need to learn how to be more responsible! Take B, for example.
Character B: Who, me? What did I do?
Character A: I don’t know. You’re the example. What do you do?
Character B: I mean… I mostly… stab things. And eat chips.
Character C: Sounds like a good example to me!
Character A: Wait— No-
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Prodigy as Incorrect Quotes
Brought to you by this lovely generator!
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MC: I think I'm falling for you.
Marlon: Then get up.
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Isla: Hey Naomi, do you have any hobbies?
Naomi: Swimming..
Isla: Really? That’s cool. I never expected you to-
Naomi: In a pool of self hatred and regret.
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MC: I need life advice.
Cyrus, sipping Gatorade and eating cookie dough: You came to the right person.
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Naomi: MC isn't talking to me.
Marlon: Enjoy it while it lasts.
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Cyrus: We’re playing Scrabble. It’s a nightmare.
Kieran: Scrabble? Scrabble’s great.
Cyrus: Not when you’re playing with MC/Marlon, it’s not. They put words like “ephemeral” and I put “dog.”
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Isla: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming?
Marlon: Can everyone in this godforsaken group please learn the skill called "Think Before You Speak"?
Cyrus: Ya know... it might be.
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Marlon: Here is my wall of inspirational people.
Kieran: Is that a picture of you?
Marlon: Yes, I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.
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Naomi: You know what’s funny about MC? They’re my best friend, and anyone who’d hurt them is someone I’d murder, probably.
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Kieran: I only have two emotions: exhaustion and stress. And I’m somehow always feeling both simultaneously.
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Marlon: Oh, so when crows remember people who wronged them and hold grudges, it’s “intelligent” and “really cool”.
Marlon: But when I do it, I’m “petty” and “need to let it go”.
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Isla: Like, no offense to myself and all, but what the fuck am I actually doing?
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Isla: It's not ugly, just aesthetically challenged.
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Cyrus: Keep it running. *Tosses keys over shoulder into empty parking lot.*
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MC: Thank you for not saying "I told you so."
Marlon: When you’re as right as I am, you don’t have to say it.
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Isla: Just be yourself. Say something nice.
Marlon: Which one? I can't do both.
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Naomi: I think MC/Kieran is in trouble.
Marlon: Alright. Struggling to give a fuck, if I’m honest.
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Isla: If I die, my funeral will be the biggest party ever and you're all invited.
Cyrus: "If"
Naomi: Great, the only party I'm ever invited to and she might not even die.
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Isla: I am not a whore, and, not that I’ve done the math, but, if I were, I’d be the super classy kind that gets flown to Dubai to stay in an underwater hotel.
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Naomi, writing in her diary with a glitter gel pen: I'm losing my sense of humanity. Nothing matters. God is dead. There's blood on my hands.
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Marlon: You disgust me.
Cyrus: *eating a kitkat sideways* I realize this and don’t care.
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MC: I think we should kiss.
Marlon: And I think you should die but we don’t always get what we want.
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MC: Is something burning?
Cyrus, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you.
MC: Cyrus, the toaster is literally on fire.
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MC: We’re having a moment, aren’t we?
Marlon: If by 'a moment' you mean me not wanting to strangle you for the first time since we met, then I guess we are.
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MC: If I run and leap at Naomi, she will most certainly catch me in her arms.
MC, running towards Naomi: Coming in!
Naomi: No! I’m holding coffee!
Naomi: *Drops coffee and catches MC*
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