annabeth: why are you following me?
percy: because we’re dating now
annabeth: okay… what about grover?
percy: we’re a package deal
grover: buy one idiot, get one free
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Percy Jackson (texting Annabeth): sends a voice message
Annabeth Chase (texting back): I’m a little busy, is it urgent?
Percy Jackson: No, don’t worry, just listen later.
later
Annabeth Chase: presses play
Percy Jackson (voice message): THERE’S A FIRE-
Extra: (Grover screaming in the background)
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Percy: why can’t we steal from the rich? We stole Jason from his camp?
Annabeth: we didn’t steal Jason, he’s free to do whatever he wants
Nico: we literally dragged him here?????
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clarisse: you know Chase, i would have SO much more respect for you if you just weren’t dating jackson
clarisse: even putting aside the multitude of idiotic things he’s said and done over the years
clarisse: i just watched him have a heated argument with a horse. over donuts.
clarisse: because he claims that bear claw donuts have a completely stupid name and should instead be called bear paws, “because the donuts don’t actually depict claws”
clarisse: and then he proceeded to ask a stingray for it’s input
clarisse: because he thought a stingray would know what a bear claw looks like
annabeth:
annabeth:
annabeth: he’s a really good kisser
clarisse:
annabeth: and to be fair, he’s right
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Percy: I’ve picked out a very special song for our date tonight!
Percy: *starts playing ‘What is Love’*
Annabeth: What’s so special about this song?
Percy: One might say we heard it on our very first date.
Annabeth: First date? What date are you thinkin—OH MY FUCKING GODS PERSEUS JACKSON TELL ME YOU ARE NOT CONSIDERING THE TUNNEL OF LOVE TO BE OUR FIRST DATE
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annabeth in 1st grade: look under there
some kid: under where
annabeth: you fool. you absolute moron. you are such a monumental idiot that you don't even realize what you just said. i am a verbal magician-
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Percy: Crushes are the worst whenever I’m near mine I start acting stupid
Annabeth: You always act stupid, Percy
Annabeth: …
Percy: Don’t think about it too hard
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Annabeth Chase: I dare you-
Sally Jackson: Percy is not allowed to accept dares anymore.
Annabeth Chase: Why not?
Percy Jackson: "I have no regard for my own or others personal safety", as some would say.
Grover Underwood: (vivid Yancy flashbacks) Fair enough.
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Annabeth: What happened to your face?
Percy: Fencing injury.
Annabeth: We don’t do fencing at ca-
Percy: I was jumping a fence.
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Percy, over iris message: I’m injured. I may be dying. This is the end for me.
Leo: Where are you??
Piper: Are you okay? Do you need backup?
Nico: Dammit Percy answer us!
Annabeth, joining Percy’s iris message: He’s fine. He just stepped on a lego.
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