#in fairness i guess i didn’t really ask but like. sir. do you take constructive criticism

[moonlit-reveriee]

Hey there Moon, if your requests are still open, could you do a C!Techno x Female! Reader who’s a total badass with weapons? Like she’s quick and agile with a bow and sword?

Hope you have a wonderful day/night! ^^

A Lover, and a Fighter

technoblade x fem!reader

this story was really fun to write, and i think it came out pretty cute. thank you for your request, and your patience. i hope you enjoy!

content warning // SFW, mention of drinking alcohol, description of fighting (no mention of blood or injury)

listen to this while you read: Notos by The Oh Hellos

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***this story takes place during & after the revolution against Dante, with the headcanon that Hypixel takes the form of a medieval kingdom within the same universe as the dsmp***

It had been a long time since Techno had visited Hypixel, and even longer since he had taken the time to observe any of the fighters being trained there. He wasn’t surprised to see many unfamiliar faces amongst the crowds battling against Dante. But one figure in particular grabbed his attention.

As he soared through the air, launched upwards by the shockwaves of Dante’s movements, he noticed someone standing on top of a nearby building. A warrior with bow and arrow held upwards to the sky, their aim remaining steady despite the tremors that shook the earth. They leapt to the ground, swiftly pulling out a sword and began chopping down several of Dante’s goons with a single swipe.

Even in the heat of battle, he couldn’t help but be impressed. There was a deadly accuracy to all of their movements. It showed tremendous skill, and dedication to honing their abilities.

Once Dante had been defeated, Techno stayed behind to aid in Hypixel’s recovery. He walked around the battlefield strewn with debris. He shook the hand of every revolutionary he could find, secretly searching for the warrior he had seen upon the rooftops.

After a while, he was able to spot them in the crowds. A woman helping clear rubble from the destroyed community center, familiar bow and sword strapped across her back.

“Thank you for your aid in the revolution”, he said as he approached, offering a hand for her to take. She accepted it with a grip strong enough to rival his own.

“I would do anything to rid Hypixel of Dante’s corruption”, she spoke with confidence. She released his hand and turned her attention back to the rubble, lifting a wooden beam over her shoulder with ease.

“I noticed the way you fought”, he continued, bending over to pick up a piece of broken cobblestone, “you seem very skilled.”

She glanced at him from the side, mouth curving upwards into a very slight smirk.

“That’s quite the compliment coming from the blood god himself.”

“I understand good fighting when I see it”, he said with a shrug. She squinted her eyes at him, almost suspicious.

“It would be foolish of me to turn down such a compliment”, she said as she walked off towards the pile of discarded wood. He chased after her, watching her drop the beam off her shoulders with a heavy thud.

“What is your name?”, he asked when she turned to face him. She paused, quickly looking I’m up and down. She seemed skeptical of his interest in her, and maybe that was fair.

“y/n”, she said, crossing her arms.

“Would you like to duel, y/n?”, he blurted out impulsively. Her eyes widened, noticing the way he was blushing out of embarrassment.

“Are you flirting with me, Sir Blade?”, mischievous grin spreading across her face.

He sputtered, blush deepening on his cheeks while she laughed boisterously.

“Let’s clean up first”, she clapped an armored hand over his shoulder with a loud metal clank, “meet me at the duels arena in a few days.” She walked past him, leaving him to twist around and watch her back as she left.

Techno ended up seeing her again before their duel. Members of the revolution were meeting in a local tavern to celebrate, and he found her lounging in a quiet corner of the bar. Tankard in her hand, she happily watched the other members of the guild drunkenly trip over themselves. He didn’t approach her, at least not at first.

Later in the evening, a man sidled up to her table. Techno couldn’t hear what he was saying, but it seemed like she was trying to politely shoo him away. Clearly drunk out of his mind, he reached out a hand and forcibly cupped her cheek. Techno stood up from his seat, ready to yank the man back by his collar. Before he could, she grabbed his hand and bent his arm backwards behind his head. The man was sent to his knees, wincing in pain.

“I said don’t touch me”, she sneered, “learn to follow my words when I say them nicely.”

She released the man’s hand, allowing him to stumble away with a steely glare. Once he was throughly out of her sight, she turned her attention to where Techno had begun to approach her.

“I appreciate your help, even though it was unneeded”, she sighed heavily.

“Does this happen often?”, he asked.

“Not really”, she said, “I guess the guys here think plate armor is attractive.”

“It’s probably the only clothes they’ve seen a woman in”, he joked. She chuckled lightly, the sound surprisingly sweet compared to her demeanor.

“Would you like a drink?”, she offered once her laughter had subsided.

“Ah, I would”, he sighed, “but let me cover it, I insist.”

“No”, she said firmly, “I’m sure everyone here wants to buy you a drink. Allow it to be me for tonight.”

He raised an eyebrow, noticing the flash of determination in her eye. He gave her a nod, surrendering to her wishes. She bought two pints of honeyed ale, sweet and subtly floral. They drank in comfortable silence, watching the absolutely wasted tavern goers make fools of themselves.

Time passed, and day of their duel arrived. The damage from Dante’s attack had finally been cleared and construction of the destroyed buildings began. Techno felt calm as he strode through the familiar courtyards of Hypixel’s training grounds, which surprised him. For some reason, he expected to be nervous. But at the same time, there was nothing to be nervous about, right? This was just a friendly duel between friends. Just friends who have only known each other for a few days.

His felt his stomach twist. Maybe he was nervous.

When he entering the arena, he found her already waiting for him, clad in a simpler set of armor than the one she wore to fight Dante. She waved her arm upon noticing his entrance, bright and crooked smile on her face.

“Are you ready to duel, Sir Blade?”, she called across the field. Something about that nickname made his heart glow.

“Only if you are, y/n.”

“Oh, I’m ready to get my ass kicked.”

“Hey now”, he retorted playfully, “I think you will put up a good fight.”

“We’ll see”, she shrugged, stretching her arms to warm up the muscles.

“Standard kit?”, he questioned, “diamond armor, sword and bow?”

“As long as it’s not a crossbow. I haven’t figured those fuckers out yet”, she muttered.

He nodded, donning a set of armor to match hers. They took stances at opposite sides of the arena. She already had a bow in hand, arrow cocked and ready. Techno had dueled one on one many times. Some more stress-inducing than other. The anticipation of this fight made his fingers tingle with excitement. A bell began to toll. Standard practice for training duels: on the fourth chime, the fight began.

An arrow whizzed from its string, narrowly missing him as he strafed right and began moving in a wide curve towards her. She switched to her sword, ready to meet his in a clang of metal against metal.

They traded blows almost evenly. While Techno’s sword swung with immense strength behind it, hers was agile and precise. When she landed a hit, it was because she could aim her sword exactly where the armor was weakest. When their swords became interlocked, she made eye contact and grinned wildly. His concentration fell, and she seized the opportunity to disengage and put some distance between them.

From her newfound position, she returned to her bow and began firing shots with a deadly accuracy. When fighting with others around his skill level, Techno liked to wear them down. Hiding and running away, giving him a chance to recover while they chased. Now, however, his strategy was being challenged. Her skill with a bow was outstanding, even at very long distances. There were very few places he could hide that she couldn’t hit.

Their reached a point where the battle was at a stalemate. They had returned to sword combat, a heavy sheen on sweat on their brows. She parried a blow from him, but he pushed back with any remaining strength he had left, sending her staggering back wards. She gritted her teeth, running forwards suddenly with a ferocious scream. It surprised him so much he barely reacted as she slammed into him right at the waist and tackled him to the ground.

He twisted to land on his side, causing her to fall on the ground next to him. They both panted, making no move to stand up.

“I-“, she gasped, “I’ve never done that before.” He huffed out a laugh, propping himself up on his elbows and offering a hand to help her sit up as well.

“That was a good fight”, he said after they’d both caught their breath.

“Thank you”, she said, removing her helmet and wiping away the strands of hair that stuck to her face, “I didn’t expect to win, but a draw is good enough for me… Thank you for giving me the chance.”

“You fight very different from me”, he said while shaking the hair out of his face, “I was curious to see how it would go. You’ll have to show me some of those sword techniques, they’re great.”

She smiled, puffing up a little bit at the praise. Her hand came up to brush away some of the dust that stuck to the side of his face. She seemed to do it subconsciously, because her eyes widened at the realization and she moved her hand away quickly. In a heat of the moment decision he grabbed her hand in midair, holding it in his own. Her eyes met his and the seconds seemed to stretch.

Something drew him, like a magnetic force, to lean in and press a kiss to her lips. It was relatively quick, but it felt so much longer to him. When he pulled away, she blinked at him. Her cheeks were pink, but he was unsure whether it was from the kiss or the fighting.

“I should have asked first, shouldn’t I?”, he said after clearing his throat.

“No, no”, she replied, still slightly dazed, “you’re fine.”

“I don’t know why-“, he stuttered, “I doesn’t have to mean anything if you don’t want it to, we can just forget it happened.”

“I-“, she paused, “… I think I’d like to remember it actually.”

The grip on his hand tightened, and Techno felt butterflies in his chest.

“I think my mind’s going a little foggy”, she continued, “could you remind me?”

It took far longer than it should have for his brain to process her words. When the gears finally clicked, a dry laugh escaped his lips.

“Are you flirting with me, dear?”, he retorted.

She laughed, a joyous and melodic sound. He cut her off before she could finish, causing her to giggle against his lips. Sitting in the middle of an empty battle arena, various weapons strewn around them, they allowed themselves to share in each other’s presence and be happy.

───※ ·❆· ※───

AHAHHAHAHA i just wanna say thank you again for this request because it ended up being such a joy to write. it was so fun to write the reader with this kind of personality

plus, it gave me an excuse to give this story a medieval fantasy aesthetic, which, in my humble opinion, is the superior aesthetic for techno

i can’t stress this enough, thank you to every anon who’s submitted a request for being patient with me! i’m trying to get through them chronologically while still giving myself enough of a break that i won’t get overwhelmed or burnt out. regardless of any wait, i hope you enjoyed!

thank you for reading <3

-moonlight

#c!techno #techno x reader #technoblade x reader #mcyt x reader

[bitchfitch]

A Pleasant Trip to the Circus

(ie, The statue man and the medusa's meet cute)

no warnings needed

Adonis' eyes had shattered months ago, but he had never needed them to see. They, like every other part of his crafted body, had been more of a decoration than an actual part of him, so it had surprised him how much he missed having them. He didn't miss their weight in his carved sockets or the tackiness of the putty that his creator had used to keep them pointing the right way, but without them his empty eyes seemed to frighten and fascinate those who looked at him in equal measures. They seemed to illicit more stares and stolen looks from strangers than when he had had them.

He didn't wish to be looked at.

When he had his eyes those who passed him on the street might cast a look his way but after seeing his human like eyes they would write off the grey stone and gold guiding that made up most of his skin as makeup. But without them it was painfully obvious that he was not flesh and blood, that his strange silence and stillness was natural and not a performance, that he was not human. 

Some recoiled at the realization, others drew closer, staring at his face and taking pictures with their phones as he held still and waited for them to leave. Some would pull at the fabric of his clothes or at the ribbons of his hair, curious fingers would touch and grope and prod as they tried to puzzle out why a statue as magnificently realistic as this one would have been left here. 

Some recognized him from before he was alive. From when he and his creator had toured the entire continent so that all could marvel at his Pygmalion's work. So that all could marvel at Adonis. 

The ones who recognized him always asked where his eyes went, or where his creator had gone. Some jokingly asked if Adonis had finally divorced the other Mr. Wright. 

Adonis did not respond to any of them. He couldn't speak even if he wanted to, so he just waited. 

He learned to travel at night, to keep his hood up and his head down. He had wanted to see the world Henry had kept him hidden from in the years following his awakening, but he had never considered that maybe many of the things Henry had said were true.

That this was not a world built for hollow stone men. That he was delicate, and trusting others to not try and break him was foolish. 

Still, he explored.

The world was so much bigger than the chateau and the corpse that rotted away at its center, and he needed to know it all. He needed to find a place where he couldn't hear his beloved creator's voice calling for him anymore. 

He found something close on a late summer's day. The scorching heat had chased most of the people into the shade and air-conditioned buildings and away from this circus that was still setting up for its opening night. 

Adonis didn't know what drew him here, didn't know what he was looking for, but something pulled him along as the dry dirt crunched beneath his heel with every step. 

A woman approached him as he neared the gates. She was older, balding, and covered in a sheen of sweat from directing the construction efforts all day, 

"Sorry sir, we're not-" her voice cought in her throat as she looked up to meet his empty eyes, she swallowed hard, taking a step back more on instinct than out of fear, "You- Hello? Are you- Are you still alive in there?" she waved her hand in front of Adonis' face, 

Adonis cocked his head. He couldn't really emote, his face frozen in the same pout that it had been carved into by his beloved, but he wondered if the stranger understood that he was confused by the question. No one had ever questioned if he was alive before, he very clearly had never been.

"Are you here to see her? The medusa? Did she do- Oh she's going to be so happy to know one of you lived!" The woman broke out in a grin as she grabbed his wrist to pull him along towards one of the tents.

He could tell that she was strong, that there was a fair amount of muscle hiding under her loose skin and fat, but he knew that not even some one like her could move him on her own. Yet, he found himself following her, too confused to resist her touch or to use his not insignificant weight to stop them both in their tracks.

She lead him to the back of a small shipping container that had been painted with the circus' name and logo in long faded colors.

Rapping on the door she called out, "Ione! You have a visitor!" 

"I do?" a soft voice called back, the entire truck the crate sat on shifted as something moved inside of it, "Who is it?" 

"He Hasnt told me his name yet, but he looks like he might be someone you'd know," the woman grinned at him while the door swung open, letting out a wave of air barely cooler than the surrounding heat as it did so,

Adonis had never taken a breath in all his years of existence, but this must be what it felt like to lose it. 

The woman in shipping container, Ione, was stunning in ways Adonis would never be able to put to words even if he could speak or write them all out one by one. 

She had the torso of a sturdy looking human woman with all the muscle and soft fat that that would imply, but instead of legs she had a long, thick snakes body trailing out into the darkness of the container behind her. Her crane like neck lead to a narrow and finely scaled vipers head that itself had a long thick tail emerging from a writhing mass of black snakes that almost looked like hair or an oil spill. Her dress was boxy and sleevless, and it showed off the defined muscles that were barely softened by the shimmer of her cremy white, or rich brown and pitch black scales. The fabric was finely beaded in intricate swooping patterns and it made such a satisfying clicking noise with her every movement as she leaned out of the back of this cargo container. 

Though she wore a thick black cloth tied around her face, covering her eyes completely as well as much of her snout, Adonis would guess those were equally enrapturing. She was completely unlike anything he had ever seen before. Large and powerfully despite the grace that flowed through her every rolling movement and stunning besides the her fearsome size.

He wondered if this is what all of those speechless mueseum goers had felt looking at him on his pedestal, though he doubted his creator could have ever made anything as divinely beautiful as this woman.

"Hello?" " she asked, her voice even prettier when not muffled by the metall walls, 

"Go on then, introduce yourself," the woman grinned, gesturing to Ione

Adonis waved lamely, though he doubted she could see the motion past her veil. He turned to the woman and tapped his fingers against his carved lips before drawing an ex over his throat in am attempt to convey his muteness.

The woman sucked in a breath as she realized her error but Ione spoke up first, "I can tell there's something here," she gestured to him, "But I don't get this joke Melanie, what is it, and why are you saying its here to see me?" 

Adonis tried not to wince at being referred to as an 'it' he knew she probably meant nothing by it, but it still hearkened back to some memories that were better left alone. 

"I don't think he can talk, but he's a statue. The same grey marble the things you turn to stone become, but he's fully animate, like he walked up to the gates on his own and everything," she gently grabs one of Ione's massive hands and tugs it towards Adonis, "Just feel his hand and that will be all the proof you need," 

Adonis hesitated for a moment as Ione's face drew tight at being man handled by Melanie,  but after quick head jerk from the older woman, Adonis did as she wanted, and took Ione's hand in his. It was mockery of a handshake, as Melanie pulled hers away. 

Ione's scales were softer than Adonis had expected them to be, like velvet or a well worn blanket instead of plastic or glass, as she carefully felt the sun warmed stone of his hand. He wondered if his smooth carving felt rough to her, if the natural texture of the rock he'd been carved from was as nice for her as her softness was for him. 

"You... are," she said softly, sadness and amazement tangling in her voice, "Did I do this to you?" 

He shook his head and gestured for Melanie to speak up for him, 

"He's shaking his head no," Melanie said, "Wait, then what happened to make you like that?" 

"Hush Melanie, he doesn't have to tell us if he doesn't want to, and besides that, I think the fact that he can't talk might make a question like that a little difficult to answer," 

"I'm sure he has a way to communicate," she huffs, "Like a pen or paper? Or Oh! Simone's little sister is deaf, so she probably knows sign, I can go get her!" Melanie had almost already ran off before Adonis caught her by the shoulder, he didn't hold her hard but still she was jolted to a stop, "Shit, you're a strong one aren't you? What's up?" 

"He stopped you from going to go get Simone?" Ione sighed, "Sir, do you even know sign?" 

Adonis shrugs and shakes his head, then he mimes out writing and shakes his head again, 

"He doesn't, and going by that second little bit of charades I don't think he can write either," Melanie scratches her chin, "Say, Stones, do you have anywhere to go?"

Adonis cocks his head and waits for her to continue, 

"Like, you came here for a reason, and given I don't think you you were looking for Ione here, maybe you were after a job? Like if you are, I think I have the perfect place for a piece of work like you," 

He shrugged again as he finally pulled his hand from Ione's, he had no need for a job, but he already felt more comfortable here than he had almost anywhere else. Melanie was a bit intense, but she didn't stare or treat him as inanimate, and the two women had already put more effort into trying communicate with him than almost anyone else ever had. So, he wasn't apposed to sticking around depending on what Melanie had to offer. 

"She probably wants you to be part of the freak show," Ione said flatly,

"The Oddities and The Beauties, Not the freak show," Melanie exclaimed, "Ignore her, Stones, we aren't that out dated around here. I promise you would be treated with the upmost respect," 

"Are we really calling him 'Stones'? He probably has a name already," Ione slithered out of her container, all 30 or so feet of her coiling out onto the grass as she closed the door to her container. He scales shimmered in the sunlight so brightly that Adonis was almost too distracted by the spectacle to continue listening to Melanie.

"Until we find a way for him to tell us his name, he's Stones," Melanie nodded, "But again, Stones, I promise you you will not regret tagging along with us. We travel all over the country  seeing everything there is to see while putting on good family friendly shows that have entertained millions! You have Got to at least stick with us through this stop so you can get an idea of what the experience is like!" she sticks out a hand, "Are you in?" 

"You haven't even told him what he would be doing," Ione said, 

Though Ione is right, Adonis doesn't hesitate to shake Melanie's hand.

"Wonderful! Ione, give him a tour while I go get things set up for tonight, you two are going to be the talk of the town before we leave it!" She runs off with a wild smile on her face before either of them can stop her. 

"I'm... sorry about her, She gets excited." Ione huffs fondly, "But come on then, I'll try and fill you in on everything she missed," 

#ione #adonis #banes and boons #cracked stones and hardened scales #my writing

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

A Miraculous TikTok Account

Part 7

First

Previous

Next

Five people. There were five people in this group.

So why could NONE OF THEM drive?!

Carapace hadn’t been expecting the rich kids to know to drive. Knowing them, they probably had chauffeurs who did it for them or whatever.

But Rena? Ladybug?!

He groaned and struggled to rub his eyes through his mask. It was too early for this.

It was a good thing all of them were fit, because the nearest Home Depot was ages away.

When they got there they decided it was best to just go in a group. Mostly because Chat was still only about half awake and someone (Ladybug) needed to push him around in a cart, but also because they all wanted to have some kind of input about how the board looked.

Carapace took out his phone.

The whole point of the ‘living together’ thing was so they could convince the public they were friends, he might as well get content that made them look like they actually got along.

The first part of the video was Chat, slumped over the front of the cart, face drawn in a sleepy smile, practically purring (actually WAS that purring? Carapace was pretty sure it was...). The camera then panned to Ladybug, who was casually throwing the items they chose at him in attempts to wake them up.

Yes, this included the giant board they were going to use to tack different things on.

No, that didn’t wake him up.

But, then, a few minutes later, he started filming again.

Chloe smiled for the camera. “Testing what can wake up our resident idiot. Trial One!”

She kicked the cart as hard as she could and sent it rolling into a wall.

Chat snored on.

Rena frowned. “Isn’t that more trial two? Ladybug throwing things was trial one.”

“Don’t rope me into this,” said Ladybug without looking up from the two different thumb tacks. She clicked her tongue and held them up for Carapace. “Glittery or not glittery?”

Carapace raised his eyebrows. “Uh… anyone gonna check on him?”

“I’ve watched him fall three stories and say ‘it’s fine’. Now, glittery or not glittery?”

Carapace opened his mouth, then shook his head. It wasn’t worth it. “Not glittery.”

“... I’ve decided you’re not allowed to have an opinion.”

“Then why would you --?!”

Rena held up a hand. “She’s right. You don’t get a say in this.”

“I --?!”

“Hey, Queen Bee, noise usually gets him up.”

“Genius!” Chloe snatched the glittery thumb tacks from Ladybug. “Trial three!”

She walked over to Chat and rattled the box by his ear. There was a shrieking noise and the camera barely caught a flicker of black before the entire cart tipped over and spilled it’s contents (including a very frazzled Chat Noir) onto the floor.

There was a short silence as the miraculous holders and the staff members who had been unfortunate enough to be scheduled for work that day processed what had just happened.

And then Ladybug doubled over laughing.

“Oh my kwami I’m so -- pftHAHAHA -- I’ll help clean up I… I just --” She giggled a little more and held up a finger for a moment as she tried to pull herself together. “One -- heheheh -- sec.”

The camera panned away from her to zoom in on Chat Noir’s pout for a brief second before it cut.

~

All the heroes helped clean up. Obviously. They were heroes.

Once they were done with their cleaning and fifty million apologies, they went back to shopping.

Chat was still in the cart but, after being woken up twice in the same day to the worst sounds his fellow miraculous holders could think of, he was wide awake.

“Guys, it’s Hawkmoth, we have to do purple!”

“No, that’s what he’d want us to do. Go the whole other way and do yellow.”

“Of course you would say that, Bee.”

“What’s that supposed to --?”

Ladybug held her hands up. “Guys, compromise. They’re complimentary colors. We can use both.”

The other three looked at her like she was insane.

Ladybug clicked her tongue and looked over at Carapace. “Are you going to weigh in on this?”

“No. I’d prefer not to get into… whatever this is.”

She rolled her eyes and shook her head. “Greeeat. Thanks.”

“No problem.”

Ladybug turned to give a tired glare to the three in front of her. “Fine. Fine! I’m deciding. We’re doing purple.”

“But --!” Started Chloe.

“Nope.”

“I --!” Tried Chat.

“Shhhhhhh. It’s decided. Purple.”

There was a little bit of grumbling, but Chloe and Chat did end up putting the yellow back.

Still, the discontent didn’t last long. Partially because it’s Paris and no one is allowed to be annoyed for over five minutes, but also because they all quickly got into choosing different things for the board.

Carapace kind of hung back for this part, because he couldn’t help but cringe whenever Chat or Chloe put something in the cart without looking at the price tags.

(What if Master Fu didn’t count this as a necessary expense? He probably would, and if he didn’t one of the rich kids would end up paying, but… it was still weird to see how careless they were with money.)

Part of him wondered what people thought about their group as they made their way through the store. A group of teenagers, all dressed in varying aesthetics from ‘literally woke up this way’ (Carapace) to ‘oh wow is that child a lawyer’ (Ladybug) to ‘I don’t care about how this looks as long as you know I’m rich’ (Chloe). They didn’t really look like the kind of people who would hang out together...

They were also all wearing masks, that had to be pretty shady.

Actually, now that he was paying attention, he noticed that quite a bit of staff seemed to be watching them.

He tried to tell himself that it was just because they’d made a mess earlier.

He knew that likely wasn’t it.

Carapace instinctively pulled his hoodie lower over his face, sinking into the green fabric. He sped up a little to walk closer to his housemates.

They had stopped to look at different borders.

Chloe was frowning. “ -- which one to choose, they’re all so ugly…”

“We could make our own…?” Said Chat.

“Or, consider, we don’t waste all our time making sure it looks good?” Said Rena.

“We’re not going to get much information for a while, we might as well use our time doing something,” said Chloe.

Rena winced. “Please don’t say that.”

Carapace raised his eyebrows. That was odd. Why was she so determined, anyways?

He shrugged it off. Maybe she just wanted to question Hawkmoth. He wouldn’t put it past her.

His eyes slid over the group to Ladybug, who was occasionally glancing at something and opening her mouth, only to close it again and look away.

He followed her gaze to a bunch of different sized purple, paper butterflies.

Oh. Did she want them and just didn’t know how to say it?

He walked over to the butterflies and checked the price. After a few seconds’ deliberation he made his way down the aisle to look at the construction paper’s prices. Hm… time versus convenience...

He looked up to ask which one would be better and cringed internally when he realized everyone had disappeared.

How did they disappear? They were so loud…

But that wasn’t his problem at the moment.

He pulled down the container of purple butterflies down and started walking.

He tried to ignore the stares of staff members as he wandered the aisles.

“Bonjour!”

Shit.

He turned around and brought a smile to his face as he looked at the lady that had come up to him.

“Salut!” He said brightly, and he tried not to take too much pleasure in the way she winced. It was his go to passive-aggressive move to say ‘Salut’ at this point, to imply that the person judging him was on the same level. Was it petty? Yes. Did it work when it came to trying to figure out if it was something innocent or not? Also yes.

“Is there something I can help you with, sir?”

“No thank you, ma’am, I’m just looking for my friends,” he said.

Should he avoid eye contact and bow his head a little? Would she think that was suspicious? He hadn’t done anything, but he also didn’t have any identification on him which wouldn’t look good if she was going to question him…

“Can I accompany you to help you find them?”

Ah. So she was going down that kind of route?

“Not necessary,” he tried.

“I insist.”

“No thank you. I’m fine.”

“A kid like you shouldn’t be left alone...”

He gripped the packet of paper butterflies so tightly that it dug into his palms.

“I can handle myself, thank you. I’m Carapace,” he said.

He fought back a cringe, but it had been necessary. If he stayed like this too long he could get akumatized, and he really didn’t need that right now.

“And I’m Ladybug,” she said, unimpressed.

Yeah. Fair enough. That was kind of hard to prove. Should he show her the kwami hiding in his pocket…?

No, reaching towards his pocket was decidedly a bad idea. She was way too wary of him for that, who knows what she’d think.

He pulled a fake smile to his face. Fine. If he could get this over with quickly he might be able to get through this without getting akumatized.

“Okay, ma’am, help would be nice, I guess…”

~~~

Taglist

@nathleigh @mialuvscats @sassakitty @th1s-1s-my-aesthet1c @blueslushgueen @woe-is-me0

#a miraculous tiktok account #nino lahiffe #carapace #chat noir #adrien agreste #marinette dupain cheng #ladybug #queen bee #chloe bourgeois #alya cesaire #rena rouge #rewriting miraculous #chloenette #chlonette #adrino

[olivarryprompts]

Fanfic Friday #10

Welcome to Fanfic Friday! Each Friday I will post a new fanfic here and on A03. Enjoy x

Read and save it on A03 here 

{peter stark and a no good very bad day}

Ship: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, Tony Stark/Steve Rogers & Peter Stark

Warnings: swearing, fluff otherwise :)

Wc: 3,984

Today, everything had gone wrong. He stayed up way past his bedtime the previous night and had gotten barely three hours of sleep by the time he arrived at school. He forgot his Spanish homework in the lab and that was the one grade he needed to pull from an A- to an A. He chugged a couple shots of espresso, and his usual store on the walk to school was closed. Meaning he had no redbull to sustain him through his classes.

Also, guess which class was straight bangout first, Spanish. So he hadn't done the homework and had no time to do it. Great. Fortunately, he made it through first period Spanish, only getting slightly scolded for not handing in the assignment. Then he had a break, and the kid desperately needed a pick me up coffee and muffin. He went to the closest cafe, one he’d come to love, only to find the whole football team there. Which would have been fine, if he wasn’t so goddamn awkward. He stood there for a solid five minutes before he asked the jock in his way to move so he could order.

Then, when the kid did get to ordering they ran out of fuckin chocolate muffins. What kinda cafe runs out of chocolate muffins at ten am? This one apparently. So coffee and blueberry muffin in hand, he headed back to the student lounge to get some work done.

The next portion of his day went as planned, a welcomed change of pace. Well Flash was a bitch, but what was new there. And his senses were through the roof. But other than that. That was all until the last period. To start, he got a text from his boyfriend, explaining that he’d no longer be arriving this Friday, but instead the following Saturday. Peter wanted to cry. He missed his boy. Leaving Harley on read, he tried to focus on chemistry, but he’d done the stuff they were going over about 100 times with Dr. Banner. He zoned out the entire class.

Finally, the bell rang and put him out of his misery. He quickly texted Ned asking if he was coming in the following day. He had been sick that day. He went to leave, but the class was stopped by the announcement of a test and more homework. For fuck sake.

He did get out, though. And he got straight in the car, barely pausing to say hello to Happy. Noticing the boy's unusual quiet, he didn’t press for more details about Peter’s day. Happy, though he’d never say it, enjoyed hearing about the kids day. He had come to really care for Peter, and his accomplishments made the older man happy. Ironic, he knew.

They had arrived at the tower in almost record time, and Peter was glad to have avoided extra time in the car. What he really craved was a couple hugs from his dads, a chat with his boyfriend, and to get through the stack of busy work that weighed him down.

Happy went round to the private entrance, wished the kid a good day, and headed off to some other errand. Peter exited, scanning his pass at security and being recognized and let through by Friday. So, he’d finally made it upstairs and there the sofa was, filled with a few avengers. Luckily his parents were among them. The two were sitting close to each other, as normal.

Peter simply put his head in his pops lap, and he laid his feet on his dad. Neither Steve nor Tony said anything, but they gave each other the look. Steve ran his hands through his son’s hair lovingly. “Pete?” Tony asked, “What happened kid?” “Nothin’” Peter replied, still buried in his Pop’s lap. “You sure about that?” Steve pressed. “Just a bad day,” Peter mumbled. “What happened паук?” Nat spoke up. She is very protective of Peter. “What didn’t happen?” he sighed dramatically. “Well you mope for as long as you like, Pete,” Tony joked. “Thanks dad,” he said, closing his eyes again in search of sleep. “Teenagers I tell you,” Clint said, rolling his eyes. “Fuck you Barton,” Peter mumbled before falling asleep properly. “He really is your child, Tones,” Clint laughed. “Hey Peter just said a bad language word,” Nat remarked. “God I hate all of you,” his Pops groaned. Then Peter fell into peaceful, safe sleep.

“Pete?” his Pops said, entering his room. He moved around, noticing he’d been moved from the sofa to his own room. He groaned. “Hello to you too.” “Yes, Hi, father, Captain America, Leader of the Avengers, Man of Strengt-” “Ok relax,” Cap rolled his eyes. Peter sat up, smirking. “Wanna tell me what actually happened today?” “J-just everything that could possibly go wrong went wrong.” “Did that start with you staying in the lab way past a normal sleeping time?” “Perhaps. How did you kn-” “You are aware that your dad designed that whole lab situation, right?” “Fair enough.” “Do we have to initiate Insomnia protocol again?” “God no, it was one night.” “Promise.” “Swear. Just an awful day. Spidey senses all acting up, being annoying, no chocolate muffins. Speaking of which, can I have the day off tomorrow? I have basically no classes.” (he wasn’t sure why, but all but one of his classes were cancelled.) Steve thought for a moment. He knew the kid had been through a lot always, and a day off never hurt anyone. Also, he was far too smart to be there anyway. “Yeah. Let me just double check with Dad, okay?” “Thanks.” “We’re eating dinner now so get cleaned up?” “Yep. Coming.”

The next day

Peter awoke at 10 with a smile on his face. He’d peacefully regained energy. He’d finished his school work the previous night, and he was happy to just relax for a day. He pulled on some SI sweatpants and a hoodie he’d stolen from Harley awhile back.

“Hey parentals,” he greeted, still holding his smile. “Morning,” his Pops said as he cooked breakfast. “Morning? Is it already?” I bet you can guess who that came from. “Tones,” Steve said, voice full of its normal concern. Peter just laughed, taking a stool at the bar. “What? I’m fine. I’m having fun.” “You promised you’d at least take a nap.” “Oops,” he smiled, heading back in the direction of the lab. “You’re a great role model to our son!” “You really are dad!” Peter added. “Love you both dearly.” Steve rolled his eyes and Peter chuckled. “Where’s the rest of the team?” Peter inquired. He’d come to realize that saying team was easier than naming all the residents of the tower. “Nat, Clint, Wanda, and Pietro are training. Thor and Loki went back to Asgard last night, and Bruce is in his lab.” “Oh, Loki didn’t tell me he was going back.” “Some emergency. Sorry kid.” “Yeah, i-it’s fine.” “He told me to assure you they’d be back soon.” “Good.” “Keaner getting here soon?” “Nah coming tomorrow now. Something about something, I don’t really know.” “Ok. Made grilled cheeses and tomato soups. It's almost done,” Steve offered. “Thanks,” Peter said. “What’s with Loki leaving that's got you so down?” “I just miss him a lot.” Steve knew that his Kid and loki had come to get on surprisingly well. They were as close as he and Nat. Not even Clint had managed to get that close.

Peter practically inhaled a couple of sandwiches. “I’m going to go work with Dad.” “Have fun!” “I will.” “Love you.” “Love you, too.” He sped down to the lab, where he could hear his Dad’s ACDC blasting as usual. “Heyo, what you working on?” “The suit nanotech. Wanna give your old man a hand?” “Always. Bring up the blueprints. What adjustments have you made so far? “Just the molecule distance and expansion weight. Trying to help stabilize the structure.” “What about the build construction stacking?” So they dove into work, Peter easily keeping up with the genius.

“Nicely done, getting too smart for me. What are you even doing in high school?” “Being bored and failing my humanities classes.” “You're not actually failing your classes are you? Grades are not everything bu-” “Relax father, I’m doing well in all my classes.” “I should probably know that. In fact I’ll actually show up to your next parent teacher conference.” “Please don’t,” Peter smiled. His father was generally very embarrassing. “Friday, make sure I’m at the kid’s next conference?” “Reminder set.” “Thanks, Fri.” “Anytime boss.” “God Fri please remind me to not show up for my next conference.” “Heyyyy,” Tony said, faking offence. “Dad, you can be very overbearing.” “I know, but-” “No.” “Fine, guess I’m not coming. Trying to be a good father and parenthood isn’t for me.” “I beg to differ,” Steve said, coming in to check on us, “realise you're no match for Peter’s intelligence yet?” “No fucking way. I’m a genius. Many PHDs. Kid hasn’t even finished high school, plus he has an A- in Spanish,” Tony laughed. “How did you-,” Peter rolled his eyes. “Friday just sent them to me.” “You’re awful.” “Hey watch it, MIT is still your dream school?” “I fucking hate you so much,” Peter really did loved this kind of banter with his father. “Maybe I do agree that parenthood isn’t for you, love.” “Capsical, you are a traitor. You’re supposed to always be on my side.” Steve kissed Tony’s cheek and ruffled Peter’s hair before saying, “Pepper needs you. Something about important business.” “Really important?” “She says if you don’t come she’ll lock you out of the company.” “That important then. Fri, tell Pepper that I’m coming.” “She has been notified, sir.” “Thank you. Bye then, Peter don’t fuck anything up.” “The same to you Mr. Stark.” Tony left the lab with a chuckle. “You two will be the death of me.” “Almost certainly.” “You staying in here?” “Nah, I have some projects in my lab waiting for me.” “You know your dad was joking about the grades right? Because grades really don’t mean anything, and they don’t define you. Nor does your intelligence. You are so much more than all that. And all these suits and mechanicy genius things-” “Pops. I’m fine. I know,” he smiled at his dad. “I just read in this parenting book that something smart or gifted kids can feel like th-” “Pops, you and dad are the best parents a kid could ask for. Stop worrying too much or you’ll turn grey like dad.” Captain America just smiled at his kid because he was the best. “Right. Good. Have fun.” “Will do.”

He messed with the design for the 100th millionth time but he couldn't get the vibrainim to synthesize with the web fluid. “Fri, get me another cup of coffee, please.” “For fuck sake, why isn’t this working,” he said to himself. He began to mess with the 3d hologram again. He typed in Mock 32 for the design and started trying again. “Pepper Potts is requesting access to the lab.” “Access granted,” he said to Fri. “Hey Pete, how’s it going?” “Badly, but it's fine. IS THAT COFFEE?” “White mocha latte, triple shot espresso,” She said, placing it down on the desk. “Ok..back up. What do you need?” “What, I can’t just bring my favorite stark a coffee?” “Aren’t you busy?” he asked skeptically. “Yes. Incredibly. So it is a peace offering. I allowed a tour access to this lab to look around, and see what a higher ups lab looks like in action. Fri will hide all of the classified things, and I thought you’d be at school. Tony just told me you weren’t so, here we are.” “He actually showed up to your meeting?” “Yes, and it wasn’t my meeting. He just needed to be there, and I didn't.” “I take your peace offering. It’s fine, I don’t care. So long as they don’t touch my shit.” “Good. Greet them, let them look around. Smile your cute smile. They’ll be up in five.” “FIVE MINUTES?” “Yep. Sorry, Hun, got to run. Thanks.” “You owe me one!”

As promised, the class showed up in five minutes. He was fine with the concept of a class showing up, he was not, however, good with his class showing up. “Is that Penis Parker?” He heard Flash. “Holy hell that is Park?” “IS THAT PETER?” “Did Peter break in?” “How is Peter here?” He couldn’t exactly kick them out. So, embracing his inner Tony Stark charm and Steve Rogers kindness, he opened the lab door, stepping into the corridor.

“EVERYONE PLEASE BACK UP AND BE QUIET!” The tour guild, Aliah, yelled. They were a kind person who Peter knew a bit. The classes quieted down.

“Hello, Aliah.” “Hi Peter,” they greeted, “Sorry, I hadn’t realized you’d be in today. I’ll just take them to our next stop.” “No, no it's fine. If it’s alright, I’ll give them a little tour sorta thing. I don’t mind, plus I kinda promised Pepper.” “That’d be really cool. Thanks.” “Yeah. Call ‘em over.” “Yeah. We’re just waiting on their teacher, he’s in the restroom.” “Course.”

Mr. Harrington showed up, questioning Aliah about the next stop. Then, he saw Peter. “Mr. Parker!” he exclaimed angrily, “How dare you show up here without a permission slip and claiming to be sick. What is this? We will be speaking with the principal and your parents about this! I am so sorry Aliah. Peter shot Aliah the “I got this” look. “Hi Mr. Harrington, I was unwell this morning, but I felt better so I came into work. Yes, I do have an internship here,” he said, loud enough for the class to hear. “The next stop on your tour,” they said, “is to Peter’s lab. He’s been so kind to give us a run-down.” Peter simply point at the door which read “Lab #55: Peter Parker.” “Right, uh, um, sorry Mr. Parker, please let us continue.” Peter smiled through his nerves. “Right, hello there class! I will be giving you a tour of my lab. I do some pretty important work, so I’m going to ask Friday to activate the ‘Guest Protocol’ to hide the classified stuff. It’s also very dangerous, so please do not touch anything.” There were nods from the class. “Right, Fri complete guest protocol and allow tour of Aliah to enter.” “Yes miniboss.” He re-entered his lab. “So, most of the time I work here,” he said, pointing to the biggest holograph table, “I work on designs, changes, and any mockups that need to happen. I then make them a reality. I can also run simulations on any formulas to see if they would be successful.” “Fri, please pull up the WFV project I was just working on for Spiderman.” “Right away mini-boss.” “So as you can see I’m trying to get the vibranium intertwine itself with Spiderman’s web fluid. This would allow the webs to be almost 47 times stronger, and also would allow them to conduct electricity, which has many uses. Anyone have any questions?” Ava raised her hand and Peter nodded at her, “Hey, so how did you learn all this? Like, it seems really complicated and you're in my chem class, so.” “I’ve worked a lot with both Mr. Stark and Bruce Banner, who’ve taught me most of what I know throughout the years. I also took a few online courses to solidify some subject matters I didn’t quite understand,” Peter, satisfied with his answer, asked if anyone else had inquired. “How did you get an internship here?” “Mr. Stark found me on the internet and took a liking to my projects. He met me and decided I’d fit right in here,” Peter explained simply. It was a lie of course, but it functioned as their cover story. “Anyone else? No. Cool, so moving onto some other sections in the lab. Over in that corner are the testing rooms. I have some more equipment scattered around for certain projects or just overall help on making things. Feel free to look around for 5-7 minutes and ask any questions you may have.” Some kid, Peter wasn’t sure of their name, raised his hand. “Why do you have cars in here? Are they yours?” “Some of the cars are mine, courtesy of Mr. Stark, who claims no lab is complete without some collection of cars. I can’t even drive them, to your point, but I guess I will when I’m eighteen. Some of the cars are Mr. Harley Keener’s, who I occasionally share my lab with. He doesn't do Avengers related projects, but he does love to tinker here and there. ‘Specially on the cars. See that red one, yeah he bought it for 5k and fixed it up. It’s actually an electric car, he just likes the old timers look. Guess that’s on him and da-Mr. Stark.”

No one seemed to have any other question, so he allowed them to look around. MJ nor Ned seemed to be in this class. He guessed they were in another group that wasn’t coming up here, or they went to a different location.

The tour went smoothly, and Flash seemed too shocked to say anything. “Peter! Peter!” Bucky came in yelling. Peter ran over to him. “Please keep it down uncle Buck.” “Oh shit your class is here!” “Yes now please don’t embarrass me.” “Won’t do! Just wanted to ask where Loki went.” “Asgard official business,” I said with a frown. “Really? He didn’t say a thing!” “I know.” “That little shit.” Peter laughed alongside Bucky. “Did you need anything else?” “Yeah, my arm's a little fucked up. Need a hand.” “Happy to give it a look. Dad in a meeting?” “To all our shock, yes.” “Ha. Give me a sec to get my class outta here.” Bucky nodded. “Right everyone, thanks for visiting. Please head towards the exit. The lovely Aliah will take you to your next location. They are awesome!” A murmur of “thanks Peter” and “is that the winter soldier” spread through the room. “See ya round,” Aliah said to him personally, “And thanks for this.” “Anytime. Bye!” They smiled a warm smile before leading the class out.

“What’s not working so well?” Peter asked. “Just some tightness in the finger motion. “Alright, okay. Fri, get me an update of the schematics, please.” “Yes, sir.” They appeared on the holographic table Peter was working at. “Right, can I please get a current scan of Uncle Bucky’s arm?” “Yes. Shall I place them next to the schematics?” “Yep. And highlight all differences.” “Yes miniboss.” “You gotta stop with that Fri.” “Name unable to be changed under the authority of Tony Stank, Badass Boss, God of Mischief, and Fiance.” “Glad the whole team is against me living a good life,” Peter remarked with an eye roll. “You drama queen.” “Thanks,” Peter smiled. “You know what’s wrong yet?” Peter opened up the schematics, looking at the highlighted section of the 3d arm model. He didn’t speak for a moment. “So I reckon, you fucked up the wiring and section T4’s minigears. None of the important tech is messed up, it’ll be fine. Maybe a half an hour fix. Max.” “Good, good. Thanks kid,” Bucky said with an appreciative smile. He nodded, disconnecting the arm carefully. He placed it onto his table next to the holographic model. He gave a skeptical look. “Something bad?” “No, no, I was just thinking. Thinking, hmn.” “Care to share with the class?” Buck said with a sense of humor lingering in his voice. “Well, you’re not on mission all that often, and this is quite a bulky arm. Ever think about getting one that’s your skin colour, lighter weight, more, I don’t know, arm like. Less hydra murdery vibes. Help get rid of that, that time.” “I have…” “So can I make it?” Peter said excitedly. “You mean it?” “Of course Uncle Buck! No clue why dad hasn’t offered before!” “Guess he never thought of it. Maybe thought I liked the scary metal thing,” he suggested weakly. “Well that’s stupid,” Peter said casually. Bucky never understood how the kid could be so compassionate so easily. “Thanks. Really.” “No worries. I’ve been looking for a new project to throw myself into. It'll be fun. And as much as I hate to admit it, I need to work on my smaller scale mechanical work.” All Bucky could do was smile his beaming smile. “Bucky!” the voice of the Black Widow shouted. “Hey Nat,” Buck replied. “Wanna train?” she asked. “As much as I want to,” he said, pointing towards the area his arm would have been. “Oh, what happened this time?” “Nothing to major, some gears and wires,” Peter filled it, “Give me twenty minutes I’ll be done.” He’d already opened the arm and gotten to the section where the wires were screwed up. “DAN-E get me the soldering kit, please,” he asked the robot, “Oh and some new T6YU wires. Red and purple.” The robot gave a vaguely human nod. “Right, I'll be waiting. Test the adjustments out on me?” She suggested. “Alright,” Buck said. “Oh and I’m in charge of ordering food. What do you want?” “Burgers?” “You boring, bland little boy,” Nat scolded. “Thai?” Buck requested. They looked over to Peter, “Sure, yeah.” Nat headed out, greeting Tony with a “Hey Stank” on the stairs out of his lab. “Yours is so much smarter than mine, why is yours so much smarter than mine,” Tony fake (real) whined. “I’m the superior mechanic, father, deal with it.” DAN-E, almosting proving his point, dropped the materials on his desk, and he continued to work. “I’m donating DUM-E,” Tony glared at him, “What happened to the arm Buck?” “Stiff fingers isall.” “Oh, ok. Pete, need a hand?” “Nah, I’m good. Not much to do. Some wires got fucked up, just replacing them now. Going to look at the minigears in the palm too, just to make sure the oil regulation and gear’s aren't broken. I think one of the gears is, but it's one of them that's easy to replace,” Peter replied, not looking up from his work. “Right, sounds good. Your pops and I are going out for the night. Be back around 12 let’s say.” “Cool. Can I borrow some vibranium from your lab?” “Sure thing kiddo. Call us if you need anything. Fri, give Peter access to vault B3 in my lab.” “Thanks,” Peter smiled. “Anytime. Good luck with ya know.” “Shouldn’t he ask you what you're going to do with a substance that costs 10,000$ a gram?” “Something about trusting me.” “Parents trust their kids with going out later or or doing their homework not fucking multimillions of dollars.” “Uncle Bucky, my parents are Iron Man and Captain America. There was never a shot at normal.” “Fair enough.”

Peter finished up the adjustment on the arm by changing a gear. “Thanks a lot kid.” “Of course. I’m going to work on your new arm now.” “Alrighty, I’ll get out of your way.” “Oh could you ask Auntie Nat what time she’s ordering dinner for? So I know when to head up, just get Fri to tell me.” “Will do.” “Thanks.”

So Peter was left to making some blueprints and drinking many red bulls. The red bull mini-fridge was actually a gift from Shuri, and his fathers had many words with him about it. He managed to convince them that he should keep it, god knows how. Well, he used the whole Princess of Wakanda and making peace and Stark Industries relationship with Wakandan products and companies as well as international relations and blah blah. It worked, who cares.

After a few hours he was called up for dinner, and he sat there and enjoyed the absolute chaos of his family.

Save/comment on A03 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/33320938

#peter parker field trip #peter parker #iron dad #stevetony #tony stark #Steve Rogers #natasha romanoff #Bucky Barnes #avengers fanfiction #avengers fanfic #found family #domestic avengers #ironfam #harley keener

[smol-and-grumpy]

Cross My Heart - CH.09

Pairing: Bodyguard!Dean x Reader; Chuck Shurley x Reader

Summary: After opening up a letter, the life as she knows it, changes forever. Her husband hires Dean Winchester to protect her but is Dean really who he said he was? And is her husband really worried about her safety?

Warnings: Flangst

WC: 2145

SERIES MASTERLIST

Dean stops to pump gas after approximately an hour — she wouldn’t know exactly, time is a fucking construct nowadays — and goes into the store while she waits by the motorcycle. Y/N leaves her helmet on, just to be extra safe.

He comes out after a couple of minutes, and only then does she dare take her helmet off. She places it on the seat. 

Dean still looks at her like she’s something fragile, which, given the circumstances, she maybe is. He hands her a chocolate bar. It’s dark chocolate, not really her favorite.

“Eat it. It’ll help calm you down.”

She can’t help but smirk at that, thinks it’s cute how he cares, but then realizes that he’s only doing his job. Which is her. And then she thought that Dean really did her too, she grins a little because she thinks she’s funny, which is really not the right time to be right now.

Y/N’s his job. Period. Because that’s what she is to him, isn’t she? Only a job and an added burden with them getting shot at. 

Looking down, she nods and unwraps the chocolate, but before she can take a bite out of it, Dean pushes his fingers below her chin, tilts her head up to look at him, “Hey, everything alright?”

How can she tell him that everything’s not al-fucking-right? That her life’s a fucking mess and that she’s slowly but surely falling for someone who only sees her as a job? How can she tell that she’s scared shitless and that she won’t ever be able to fall asleep again without hearing bullets flying against the wall and into her home?

Instead of telling him all that, though, she nods, “Yeah, just never been in a shootout before.”

“It’s been a while for me either,” He huffs out a tired chuckle. 

That’s right. He’s been deployed, has probably had a fair share of being shot at. She never asked him what he did, not that she doesn’t want to. It’s more that it doesn’t really matter to her who he was or what he did. What matters is that he’s here when she needs him the most.

There are scars, though. She’s seen them, even if the light was dim. She also felt them underneath the pad of her fingers.

Dean sighs before his hand comes up and he lets his thumb brush over her chin, thumbs at the corner of her lips and the crease between his eyebrows grow. Apparently, she’s a terrible liar.

He leans closer and speaks in his soothing husky voice, “I got you, okay? I won’t let anything bad happen to you.”

She nods teary eyed, “Promise?” She wants to believe him. 

Dean smiles. It’s wide and white, there are crinkles around his eyes, “Cross my heart.”

Leaning down, he steals a kiss, his lips are warm and soothing. 

He waits for her to finish the chocolate bar so they can drive to wherever he takes her. She doesn’t really ask him anymore where they’re going, because she had made the choice and at this point, she’d follow him anywhere.

 *

 After about what felt like another hour's drive, they arrived at another safe house, hidden by another forest. The sun’s slowly coming up, there’s a hazy glow and the ground condenses, little patches of fog rise up.

If it wasn’t for her being on the run, she'd say that it’s beautiful here, that it’s picturesque and maybe if there are other circumstances surrounding her being here, she might even be able to enjoy it. But she swears, she’s already a little sick of the damn trees. 

Dean halts his bike and waits for her to get off before he gets off it himself, and walks around to take the bags, places them on the ground. He then wordlessly wheels his bike behind the cabin.

She hears plastic, some leaves rattling. Didn’t dare to go look or follow him. She’s just too tired too and she stands there, waiting for him with her arms wrapped around herself. The mornings are cool and the effect of too little sleep makes her shiver to her bones.

About five minutes later — could be longer too, she wouldn’t know — Dean comes back, rubbing and brushing his hands against each other, a satisfying smirk decorating his face.

He comes to stand before her, towering over her, as he rubs at her arms and pulls her into a warm embrace, “You okay?”

She manages to nod, her teeth are already chattering together.

“C’mon, let’s get you inside before you freeze to death,” Dean places his warm lips on her forehead, before he picks up the bags from the ground, takes her hand to walk to the front of the cabin.

On the porch, Dean walks to the far right side, kneels down and opens a little trap door to take out a box. Inside of the box, he finds keys to the cabin.

They step inside and she takes in her surroundings. Everything looks almost the same as the previous cabin, only a little more modern, cozier, too. The sofa is bigger, the TV is the same as in the previous cabin, though.

“You want anything to drink? Or food?” His voice jerks her back to reality. 

“No,” She says warily, “Thanks, I’m good.”

“The bedroom’s over there,” Dean jerks his head to the adjacent room while he walks into the kitchen to drop off things he bought at the store, “Go to bed, get some rest.”

She nods and makes her way to the bedroom with her  backpack in hand. The bed’s bigger here. Could easily fit the both of them without her having to move too much out of the way. Not that she thinks he’s going to stay in the bedroom with her, though. She doesn’t really know where they stand after last night. Didn’t dare to ask because there are more important things right now. For example trying not to get killed.

Dropping her backpack into the closet, she takes off her jacket and shimmies out of her pants, climbs into bed, and covers herself with the blanket. She lies there on her side. Exhausted but not tired enough to fall asleep yet. 

Dean walks in after a while, a mug of coffee in his hand. He slowly moves over, as if he wants to see if she’s sleeping yet and when he sees that she isn’t, he sits on the bed, on the side where she’s curled up, and places the mug on the bedside table. 

“I don’t want coffee, thank you.” She mumbles.

“Who said it was for you?” He chuckles while his hand comes up to stroke at her head, tucking a loose strand of hair back behind her ear, “You should try to get some sleep, I’ll be in the living room, doing some paperwork.”

Y/N looks at him, her eyelids feel heavy, “Can you stay close?” She didn’t want to come across as needy but it’s hard because right now, that’s all she is. She wants him close, wants to know that he’s here to protect her.

“Of course,” There’s a warm smile on his face. It came out too quick. Like he didn’t even need to think about it at all, “I’ll just get my laptop.”

Dean takes the mug and walks out, only to return with the laptop in his other hand. He takes off his shoes and gets into bed, too, sits with his back to the headboard and she turns herself the other way, curls up next to him. 

He strokes her hair back, “Sleep, okay?”

She nods, her eyes are already closing.

*

Y/N wakes to something heavy draped over her body. 

The sun is bright in the sky, she guesses that it’s mid afternoon. Not that the time of day matters, since recently, one day blends into another fucked up day.

She blinks the sleep out of her eyes before she looks down on herself, sees the source of the thing that crushes her.

The heavy thing is Dean’s arm. 

He’s sleeping soundly, one hand protectively draped over her. She stirs a little and that was already enough to wake him. God, he’s such a light sleeper. So jumpy all the time.

Dean lifts his head alarmed and looks around, but soon lets it fall back onto the pillow and closes his eyes again when he sees that it’s her.

“I thought you were going to be working?” She says teasingly.

He squints one eye open, his voice is raspy and full of sleep when he speaks, “You looked so peaceful, and then you started to talk in your sleep.”

“I did?” Her cheeks feel warm, and she’s a little embarrassed.

“Yeah, you trashed around and called out my name. I had to hold you down and then I couldn’t resist falling asleep either.”

Y/N blushes. She called out his name? She wishes the bed would open up and swallow her whole.

Dean hand goes under the blanket, finds her waist, and pulls her closer into him. He kisses her forehead, “No matter how hard I try, I can’t resist you. No matter how professional I try to keep things between us, I fail, because one look at you and my walls come crashing down.”

Her heart beats ridiculously fast upon hearing him say those words. Just when she opens her mouth to say something. Opens them up to tell him that it’s okay, that she welcomes it when he isn’t going all bodyguard on her. That she feels the same and wouldn’t want him to go back to being professional— his phone rings.

He tilts his body, reaches for it blindly, his hands search on the nightstand and when he finds it and looks at the caller ID, he frowns a little. Dean holds it out, shows it to her.

Chuck.

Dean picks up and puts Chuck on speaker. She knows that it’s also his way of reassuring her that he isn’t behind any of Chuck’s plans. 

“Hello?” Dean’s voice is still raspy and he clears his throat.

“Mr. Winchester, I didn’t get a text this morning and am worried!”

Chuck sounds weird, his voice is a little higher than usual. But she can’t miss the annoyance in it.

Dean places the phone between them, turns to brace himself on his elbow, “Yeah, uh, I’m sorry, sir. Everything’s fine. We are alright. I was out at the store because we were running out of food.”

There’s a long awkward pause until Chuck talks again, “Okay,” 

“I don’t have to remind you that you should be careful, do I?”

“No, sir.”

She can see the tense in Dean’s shoulder. And really, who is he to tell Dean how to act? Chuck crosses the line but that’s so typical. 

“Good,”

“Do you have any news for us?” Dean asks and looks at her. 

“News? Uh.. no, there’s still none. You stay put.”

“Of course,”

“Report back to me, Mr. Winchester.”

Chuck hangs up before Dean could say anything. And he didn’t ask about her once. 

“Wow,” She huffs out hot air, “Do you think he knows?”

Dean rolls on his stomach towards her, pushes himself up on his elbows. He looks at her and chuckles, “You mean about us?”

Us. 

She tries not to get too excited at the mention.

Y/N groans and rolls her eyes, “Duh,”

“No, and he doesn’t seem to care about you one bit anyway,” Dean says and she knows that he’s right.

Dean gnaws on his bottom lip, his face deep in thoughts. He’s thinking of something and she thinks she knows what bothers him.

“You think he knows about the shooting,” She states as a matter of fact.

He breathes out, pinches at the bridge of his nose, “There’s something fishy about it, yeah.” He leans down, kisses her gently, “And I absolutely hate how he treats you.”

Before she can say anything, Dean pushes himself up on his knees, runs a hand through his hair, “I mean, he usually doesn’t even care if I miss on some texts. Why care now? He also never calls. Good thing he doesn’t know that we changed our house yet. I’d like to keep it a secret for a little while longer.”

Getting off the bed, he reaches under the blanket, and searches for her legs. When he finds them, he pulls at them with one swift motion, making her shift down until her feet are dangling off the edge.

He inspects her calf, “We need to change the bandage.” And then with the next breath he says, “Come on, let's fix you up and find something to eat before I eat you up.”

Well, she can’t say that she would mind if he does.

CH.10

#cross my heart #dean winchester #bodyguard!dean #dean winchester fic #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester fan fiction #dean winchester fan fic #nathalie writes

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #238: Unlimited Vision

December, 1983

He is Oz, the great and terrible. And he can see ALL.

So what’s going on here? Has Vision been in a tube-coma so long that they just decided to replace him with a giant hologram?

Dunno, but he sure is filling the room with too much pink energy and kirby crackle.

So, there’s been a bit leading up to this.

In Avengers #233, Vision and Scarlet Witch were called in as reservists to help the team with an invisible dome Annihilus was using to destroy the universe, as ya don’t do. When Vision intangibled into the dome, he immediately fell onto his face inert. After the crisis, Reed Richards/Mr. Fantastic examined the synthezoid and said that nothing was actually seriously wrong and that Vision would be able to repair himself.

Despite that, he’s been inert in a tube since #234, moved into the Avengers Mansion so they could keep an eye on him. Maybe Reed doesn’t know shit because it’s been several issues!

The Avengers have been taking shifts watching Vision and the least suited to sitting still and watching an inert synthezoid is on duty as this issue opens.

“But being an Avenger, he’s discovered, doesn’t mean saving the universe every waking moment. Sometimes, it requires a lot of sitting... and watching... and waiting!”

Hahahahahah!

I might sympathize more if it weren’t for his full page rant.

Like this goes beyond bored and into ‘UGH I have to do something not immediately entertaining??’

Wait, I’m like that sometimes...

Starfox: “I just don’t understand! My father’s computer assured me that the Earth would be teeming with excitement and adventure -- and from previous experience, I knew that the Avengers invariably became involved in such adventures. But I haven’t seen a bit of action since we saved Project Pegasus from total destruction. That was more than a day ago! Now with Thor off on a mission in space... Captain America away on a personal mission... and the lovely ladies of the Avengers taking the afternoon off, naturally it’s the ‘trainee’ who gets stuck with keeping watch over the Vision!”

“By Chronos, is there no justice?! Where are the thrills, the challenges?!? Am I never to know satisfaction? I didn’t come all the way to Earth just to stand watch over some infernal android in a life-support-tube!”

“Ah, forgive me, friend Vision. I should not make you the object of my resentment. You were, after all, injured to end the threat of Annihilus. It’s just that sitting around and playing nursemaid to a comatose synthetic man is hardly my idea of fun!”

Vision: “I sympathize... but it has not been enjoyable for me either.”

HAH!

Imagine complaining so hard about having to go a day without an adventure that you wake a robot from a robot coma.

Over in a scene shift, there’s Monica “Captain Marvel” Rambeau trying out a boat in the Gulf of Mexico. The salesman is trying to close the deal but Monica finds herself distracted by the events of the previous issue.

Even though she saved the day from lava men and then stopped a nuclear meltdown, she still feels crappy that Moonstone and Blackout escaped AND that Blackout was able to capture her.

When the salesman finally gets her attention again she says she needs a bigger boat!

I’m still wondering what her new career is going to be! She’s taken out a small business loan and looking into buying a boat.

Possibly shark hunting?

Good on her for building a life away from avenging. You never know when you have to retire from superheroing and take up a civilian career.

Back at the Vision tube, Starfox sets up a voice amplifier on Vision’s tube so Vision can talk more easily.

It transpires that he didn’t just wake up in time to deliver the ultimate dunk on Starfox, he’s been conscious for several days. He’s been able to hear and see what’s been going on around him but he hasn’t been able to move or talk.

Starfox apologizes for his rant but Vision doesn’t actually mind.

Vision: “No offense taken. I found it entertaining in a way... I hadn’t heard such vitriol since the time the Beast found himself on monitor duty during the opening night of a Roger Corman film festival. As a matter of fact, I’ve enjoyed all of the one-way conversations that have gone on about me. Captain America’s war stories were most informative -- and the She-Hulk’s stories were quite amusing... If a bit tawdry!”

Amazing.

I actually like that the Avengers have been talking to Vision like a person in a meat coma and not ignoring him like a dysfunctioning fridge of a Jocasta.

He’s their buddy and they kept talking to him in hopes that somewhere he heard them. And he did!

Even all the dirty jokes!

Vision tells Starfox that he’s mostly confused about all the paralysis and that his repair systems haven’t restored his movement. He wishes that he could more fully analyze his condition.

Which gives Starfox a wonderful idea! A wonderful, terrible idea!

He calls up Jarvis on the video-intercom and asks what the range of the Avengers communication system is. Like. In terms of... interplanetary?

Jarvis: “All equipment is state-of-the-art, sir. I dare say we could make contact with any corner of the Solar System!”

I know that the Avengers deal with a lot of space nonsense so it makes sense that they’d need that range. Starcore-One and all.

Anyway, Starfox uses a tight beam signal to communicate allll the way to the master computer ISAAC on Titan.

Meanwhile, the three whole women on the Avengers (She-Hulk, Wasp, and Scarlet Witch) are on a mission together. A friend mission. A friend mission of find She-Hulk an apartment mission because that’s been a subplot for a while and She-Hulk deserves nice things.

Huh! If you ever wondered what the relative heights of some Avengers were here we are.

She-Hulk is most tall. Scarlet Witch is pretty tall. And Wasp is a short.

Comics being comics and not big on consistency, I’m sure this is contradicted a dozen different places. But its fun.

Of course, in the innocent 80s (??) people just weren’t used to seeing tall green woman a-walking down the street and gawk.

But it doesn’t bother She-Hulk like it used to.

She-Hulk: “I must be getting used to this town, Waspie! The gawkers don’t faze me in the least anymore. In fact, I’m starting to have fun, staring back!”

Wasp: “Uh-huh! I’ve noticed you practicing on our dreamy new trainee! Starfox is really something, isn’t he, She-Hulk?”

She-Hulk: “You know it!”

Scarlet Witch: Starfox does have a certain something in the way he carries himself...

She-Hulk: “I’ll bet that Starfox even does something for an old married lady like the witch!”

Scarlet Witch: “Wh-what?! Why, that’s ridiculous! I mean... that is... the Vision is the only man in my life!”

She-Hulk: “Aw, come on, Wanda! You’re married, not dead! ‘Fess up, don’t you like the way Starfox just sort of... stands around?”

Scarlet Witch: “Well, if you put it that way -- !”

Just some gals being friends and talking about how hot their new co-worker is.

Just objectifying a foxy guy... from space.

I like She-Hulk someone immediately sensing Wanda thinking about how hot Starfox is. She has a sixth sense for it.

And I fear because Janet “Aesthetic Appreciation for Every Man” Van Dyne now has a comrade in arms in Jennifer “What are inhibitions?” Walters.

The three arrive at the apartment building Jan found for Jen (not confusing at all). The rental agent isn’t around but Jan basically does whatever she wants and the door is open so they go in to look around.

And its a good apartment! Its got a terrace, high ceilings, deep carpeting! Its perfect for She-Hulk! The long subplot is finally at a resolution!

Alas.

The rental agent comes in and when he learns that its Jen who wants to rent the place. Really wants to rent the place. “You can draw up a lease -- I don’t care how much the rent is!” wants to rent the place. He has one (1) concern.

Rental agent: “My lord! You... you’re green!”

She-Hulk: “Yeah, and you’re a pasty shade of pink! So what?”

Rental agent: “I... I can’t rent to you! What would the other tenants say?”

Oo buddy that’s illegal under the Fair Housing Act. Especially if you just come out and say it. Granted, I don’t think it foresaw this exact scenario so let me rephrase. Oo buddy she is not shy about hurting people who annoy her.

She-Hulk: “Outta my way, Jan! I want to turn Mr. Pink black-and-blue!”

Wasp: “Forget it, Jennie! We’ll find a better place!”

But since Wanda doesn’t have any patience with bigotry, she uses her magic-science mutant magic to set off the fire sprinklers above Rental Agent.

I guess he’s allll washed up.

Back over in New Orleans, Monica returns to her apartment still hung up on Blackout and Moonstone getting away.

I guess it is her first failure as a superhero? It’s a very minor one but if you were on a winning streak before, it could knock you for a loop. Monica seems like the sort of person who holds herself to very high standards.

She considers calling the Avengers on her bracelet radio to see if there’s any leads on the two loose ends but then realizes that she can travel at the speed of light. She may as well just pop into the mansion!

Monica has cool powers.

But when she arrives inside the mansion, she sees a bunch of electronic components just floating through the mansion.

Soooo she follows them. Gotta see what’s going on.

She finds Starfox in the medical room constructing some apparatus around Vision’s tube.

Starfox explains that stuff be floating because ISAAC is using an attractor beam to assemble an apparatus. ISAAC being the Titan computer Integral Synaptic Anti-Anionic Computer.

It sure is cool that some Eternals that went to live on Titan before modern English existed still managed to name their computer ISAAC.

And its cool that ISAAC can apparently influence things like this halfway across the solar system.

Anyway, ISAAC is linked up with the main computers of Avengers’ Mansion to build a more specialized medical computer to get a better idea of what’s going on with Vision.

Vision: “It sounds complicated, Captain, but the principles involved are actually quite simple.”

Captain Marvel: “Vision? You spoke!”

Vision: “That seems to surprise everyone... pleasantly, I hope.”

He explains that if everything goes well with this apparatus, he hopes to be ambulatory again before tomorrow. And also, because he’s a class act, thanks Monica for the stories of New Orleans she shared when she was on Vision duty.

In a funny continuity nod, Vision notes that he and Wanda went to New Orleans once (in issue #152) but didn’t have time to sight-see. Because there was a lot of voodoo nonsense going on.

The Avengers tend to go all over the world but they also tend to be involved in nonsense and can’t enjoy it.

Monica isn’t sure whether they should go ahead with this without consulting the other Avengers but Starfox shrugs that it’s Vision’s decision.

Vision: “In that case, I choose to begin analysis immediately!”

In fairness, I’m sure he’s fed up with lying in a tube staring at the ceiling. Bring on the untested science! My god, just anything novel!

Starfox activates the devices, showing Vision’s body with unearthly energies whiiich makes him twitch and spasm and then a tiny Vision head pops out of his forehead gem.

Mazel tov?

I don’t think that was the intended outcome.

Outside, She-Hulk, Scarlet Wanda, and Wasp are returning from Apartment Quest.

Wanda mentions that she didn’t mean to be away from Vision this long.

Wasp: “Don’t worry, Wanda. I’m sure nothing’s gone wrong!”

Giant disembodied Vision head: “WRONG? ON THE CONTRARY, EVERYTHING’S GONE JUST FINE!”

Oh my god, he got Oz’d.

Imagine coming home to that! You go on an errand with a friend to take your mind off your coma robot husband and you come back and he’s a giant holographic head!

The three Avengers rush inside and find a more reasonably sized Vision hologram and Starfox protesting that this wasn’t how things were supposed to go.

Yeah, I suspected.

But Vision is thrilled with this turn of events!

Vision: “Evidently, the internal dysfunction in my body caused a data feedback-loop which overloaded my brain with ISAAC’s energy-information matrix. Simply put -- I have become as one with ISAAC and our own computer systems! The ability to project this holographic construct is a fortuitous side-effect!”

Huuuuuuuuuh!

Vision merged with some computers. This is fine. Is this fine? Is Vision fine? Starfox wants to know and so do I.

Vision: “ALL RIGHT?!? I’ve never been able to think more clearly. Even with my body temporarily out of order, I can be of great help to the Avengers! I can out-think, out-deduce any computer system in the world! All the information in our files is mine -- instantly! For instance -- I see there’s some unfinished business pending! Two opponents escaped us recently! Those two must be found!”

Well, Monica will be happy with that at least.

Geez, Vision is kind of... manic? Maybe its just the contrast to how dour he tend to be. But he definitely seems keyed up. Like he’s running high on having all these computers running through his brain.

Is this robot drugs?

Wait, no, vibranium is robot drugs. Is this other robot drugs? Connect to a super-computer and scream I’M THINKING SO FAST! ?

MEANWHILE, those very two miscreants!

In a hideout in the Bronx, Blackout is ranting paranoid about how they’re out to get him and are going to merge him with the light spectrum and destroy his humanity. Which is fairly unique paranoid ranting.

Of course, while he’s focused on glaring out the window, he’s not paying attention to Moonstone who prepares a drugged cup of coffee for him.

Blackout: “You’re the only one, Moonstone... the only one who hasn’t betrayed me!”

Moonstone: “That’s right! You can trust me! Now, drink it all down!”

Womp womp.

The drug makes Blackout trance out and Moonstone uses this to start interrogating him about his origin. And... maybe trying to help him? She did start off as a therapist. And even as a villain, she sometimes does therapy.

For some damn reason, Hank “Good Ideas” Pym got her to look over Avengers Academy kids down the line and offer her thoughts on them.

Anyway. Moonstone asks how he got this way:

Blackout: “Well... I ‘spose it all started when Dr. Croit set me up so I’d have to be his guinea pig. He... charged up my body with the power of a black star! That’s why I... *yawn* ... had to punish him!”

Moonstone: “Shh! I want you to listen closely... there are no black-star energies... There’s no conspiracy against you! Let your mind drift back! I want you to tell me what really happened!”

So what really happened is here’s how a Mark Daniels became a man with a lightning bolt mask. He was a lab assistant to Dr. Croit.

Blackout: “He always wanted to be everyone’s big daddy!”

Um. Okayyy?

Anyway, Mark Daniels was helping Croit build an experimental device for tapping energy from other dimensions. And, at least according to Blackout, Dr. Croit liked Mark Daniels because he was a dummy who didn’t understand the experiment at all.

Then one day, while he longingly caressed it, the device blew up in Mark Daniels’ face, somehow making his body a control surface for tapping into another universe’s “dark force.”

Dr. Croit wanted to cure Mark Daniels who took exception to the idea of having his newfound power taken away. So he killed Dr. Croit and the other assistants.

But the power was running out of control (shouldn’t have killed the doctor, ya dingus) and before Blackout could use the stabilizer to save himself, he got stuck... somewhere. Its a bit fuzzy to him until he popped out in Project Pegasus.

Moonstone believes that his mind couldn’t cope with what happened to him so he made up the black star nonsense to be An Explanation.

Moonstone: Imagine... all of that power at the command of a raving paranoid! Yes, but he’s a paranoid who trusts me! Now that I have a handle on his power, I should be able to manipulate him into doing just about anything I wish! Why, with the dimensional-warping potential of a power like his, we could be unstoppable!

“Blackout, we have a very bright future ahead of us!”

And then Vision pops in from nowhere and gives Moonstone a startle.

She fires some of her hand pew pew at him but he’s a hologram and just sasses back.

Moonstone runs to wake up Blackout while Vision can’t help but show off how smart he is now that his computer brain is overclocked.

Vision: “It was, of course, clever of you to seek refuge in a hideaway of your former ally, Egghead! Unfortunately, with all the cross-referenced data instantly at my disposal, tracing you here was child’s play!”

Blackout wakes up and Moonstone basically points at Vision and tells him ‘get ‘im!’ and Blackout gets ‘im.

He uses the same imprisoning black sphere move on Vision as he did on Captain Marvel.

And it probably would have worked. If Vision was really here. He’s just a hologram. And, sure, the light of the hologram would probably be trapped in the sphere too. It trapped Captain Marvel when she was light. But Vision is being projected from elsewhere so he can just turn the projection off and then turn it on slightly to the left.

Vision: “I’m sorry, but that won’t work either! You see -- I’m not really here at all! But my friends are!”

Oh, Vision, you sassmaster.

Moonstone’s ‘knows when to fold them’ kind of lapsed when she was attacking Vision instead of remembering ‘hey doesn’t that guy hang with the Avengers?’ but a whole bunch of Avengers busting in reminds her.

She blasts the floor beneath her and Blackout to try to escape and has Blackout seal the hole behind them to buy time.

But Scarlet Witch is still a great counter to... maybe anyone? But especially Blackout.

She waves her hands at the black barrier and it turns into goo and drips all over Blackout and Moonstone, ensnaring them before they can even try to run.

The Avengers storm after the two villains.

Trapped, Moonstone tells Blackout its up to him to stop the Avengers!

Moonstone: “Concentrate on your power! It’s greater than you realize! If you try, you can control it completely... make it do anything! Concentrate... make this 'dark force’ release us! Yes... that’s it! You’re doing it! But you can do more than just reform the darkness into a protective sheath! You can turn it back on the Avengers... you can make them merge with the darkness! And then we can get out of here!”

Vision warns the Avengers that the dark-force is a manifestation of another universe but She-Hulk is skeptical so goes to grab Blackout out of the black goo but her arm goes right through him.

And not in the gory way that you’d see these days.

Blackout and Moonstone are pretty perplexed too.

Apparently, he done goofed and merged him and Moonstone with the darkness and the two get sucked into a singularity and disappear.

Vision: “This may be a first... Our enemies have actually imprisoned themselves!”

Geez, Vision, these assholes might be dead.

-google- Huh. Nope. They’ll be back to menace.... Dazzler? Huh. It be like that sometimes.

Sidenote: I do like that Captain Monica Marvel, as the newest to this superhero life, is the one that most visibly shows shock and consternation at two villains being sucked into an unknown fate.

It’s a nice touch.

Even though the villains maybe got away? Or got sent to the next dimension? She-Hulk congratulates Vision on finding them. And then notes, seconded by Wanda, that Vision is becoming more of a vision.

Scarlet Witch: “Darling? Your holographic projection is starting to fade!”

Vision: “So it is! I seem to be having some difficulty maintaining the transmission over the distance! Perhaps I’ve overextended myself a bit.”

He decides to switch off the projection to run a systems check.

Later, back at the mansion, the Giant Floating Head of Vision reassures everyone.

Vision: “I was just explaining to Captain Marvel that there’s nothing to worry about! As I’d already guessed, the strain of the long-distance transmission was a bit taxing. A few days of rest, and I’ll be able to transmit myself almost anywhere. Of course, by then, I hope to be physically mobile, as well.”

Scarlet Witch: “Vision, you must be more careful! It’s not safe for you to consider using this power again... not until you’re fully healed!”

Vision: “You mean ‘repaired,’ Wanda. But, yes, a certain amount of caution is required. I must adjust to this extra power in stages. Once I’ve mastered it, I’ll never be so helpless again. I’ll be able to do anything... anything!”

Well.

That’s a massive red flag.

Being locked in a tube has not done wonders for Vision’s emotional state that he always pretends he doesn’t have.

(Side note again: I like that Wasp’s costume has an open back, for her wings. It’s another nice touch.)

Starfox asks if Vision has ever had ego problems but Wasp says he’s never had a swelled head like this.

Nah, not exactly. But can you imagine!

But yeah, no, she says he’s never showed ego like this before.

Its actually such a massive red flag that everyone present seems to pick up on it.

But there’s no time to address that because they get an emergency call from Tigra.

Ah, Tigra! You were fun the short amount of time you were here. What wacky hijinxes do you have going on now?

Tigra: “I’m at St. Anthony’s Hospital in San Francisco, Jan. No, I’m fine -- but a friend of mine is literally at death’s door. She may not make it if we don’t get some help fast... and I mean big help! It’s hard to explain over the phone, but... do you believe in ghosts?”

!!!!

Why, Tigra! I didn’t know you and Spider-Woman were friends!

So next time.... uh. We won’t be addressing this right away. The next Avengers’ issue is an infamous offering from Assistant Editor’s Month and before we can even get to that, we need to look into what Hawkeye has been up to because it’s kinda relevant. Or will be relevant soon. When Marvel decides to give this liveblog a headache by splitting the party.

Oh yes, West Coast Avengers looms in the near future. As does Secret Wars. As does David Letterman!

Good grief!

Follow @essential-avengers​ because I’m going to try to cover all these things. That’s a good reason to follow, probably. Also, like and reblog if you like to reblog.

#avengers #Moonstone #Blackout #the Vision #Scarlet Witch #She Hulk #Starfox #the Wasp #Captain Marvel #Monica Rambeau #Essential Avengers #essential marvel liveblogging #Starfox has a big influence for a guy who is so Starfox #Vision the Great and Powerful #the continuing mishaps of Apartment Quest '83 #Moonstone commits an error

[dontasktheradiodemon]

Ball Debrief (2/16/2021)

So on the Sunday before Mardi Gras, Alastor and Sir Pentious a.k.a. Telly (@usedhearts) went to a Mardi Gras ball, got drunk, and made out. On Mardi Gras evening, Sir Pentious a.k.a. just-Sir-Pentious-still-because-he’s-never-asked-Alastor-to-call-him-anything-else (@hiss-and-vinegar​) found out from Telly that he and Alastor went to a ball, and messages Alastor to ask about it.

Alastor comes over to tell Sir Pentious about it, reassure him that he’s NOT replacing him with a new snake bestie, and then starts panicking while trying to summarize the ball because oh god he’s not ready to face the possibility of Romance.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 SO, ALASTOR. WHEN WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THAT IT WAS THE OTHER SIR PENTIOUS THAT YOU'D GONE OUT WITH?

🐍 YOU LEFT THAT OUT FOR SOME REASON, AND IT SEEMS AN IMPORTANT DETAIL.

🐍 DID YOU NOT WANT ME TO KNOW?

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I was going to tell you my plans the last time you and I hung out! I just didn't get around to it before you had to go.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 OH.

🐍 AND YOU AND HIM GOT DRUNK? I SUPPOSE THAT IS A CARNAVAL ACTIVITY...

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Nothing to drink there but champagne and wine, I'm afraid.

🎶 Truth be told, I got much drunker than I should have.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 YES, I WAS SURPRISED TO HEAR YOU'D GOTTEN HUNGOVER, TRUTH BE TOLD.

🐍 MUST HAVE BEEN A WILD PARTY!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Wilder than it should have been.

🎶 But yes, some exciting things did happen! Very exciting!

🎶 Actually—do you want to meet? It's so much harder to have a conversation over text, and I'd like to tell you about my evening if you want to hear about it.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 VERY WELL, LET'S MEET. TEXT IS DIFFICULT TO ASCERTAIN THE MEANING OF CERTAIN THINGS.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Where do you want—hotel, airship, other?

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 THE AIRSHIP.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I’ll be there in five minutes.

Alastor

Guess who! It’s Alastor, just like he promised. Wearing what looks like a costume constructed completely out of multicolored fabric fringe trim and carrying a bowl of gumbo. He sort of rustles when he moves. “Hello~?”

Sir Pentious

Sir Pentious was awaiting him in the sitting room, looking kind of SULKY..... Draped over the couch......

Until he sees whatever the fuck Alastor is dressed as. SNRK. HE STARTS LAUGHING.

"WHAT THE *HELL* IS THAT??"

Alastor

He looks down at himself. Oh, right. “It’s a costume!” Very informative, Alastor. “An old and *noble* Mardi Gras tradition! You see—we wear these to steal chicken.” He holds out his bowl. “Speaking of which! Gumbo?”

Sir Pentious

Ah- RIGHT, Mardis Gras..... Sir Pentious sinks down again..... He's looking away.....

Alastor

Alastor slowly lowers the gumbo bowl. “I made sure this serving got the tender meat chunks.” ~~PLEASE LIKE HIM.~~ “I’ll just... set it over here and you can put it in the ice box later.”

He takes a seat near Sir Pentious. “So! Here I am!”

Sir Pentious

He likes you SO MUCH but he THINKS you DO NOT LIKE HIM AS MUCH!

He *siiiighs*........ So dramatic...... and he looks at Alastor.... Glances away.... Glances back....

"THANK YOU FOR THE GUMBO, I AM NOT YET HUNGRY AT THE MOMENT..."

Alastor

PENNY YOU FOOL.

“Sure! Not a problem! It’ll be there later!” DEEP BREATH. “So! You... wanted to know about the big shindig, I think?”

Sir Pentious

Deeeeep inhale.......

".... YESSS...... THE ONE WHERE YOU WENT WITH A *DIFFERENT* SSSIR PENTIOUSSSSS.... AND DIDN'T TELL ME, BUT BECAUSE IT NEVER CAME UP....." Oh. Mopey..... His arms are folded....

"A NEW SSSIR PENTIOUSSSSS TO DRINK WITH, TO PARTY WITH...."

Alastor

*Oh.* Okay, all right, Alastor senses a brewing crisis. He’s going to put the party report in a box and shove it in a closet until he deals with this.

“Hey, now!” He scoots closer. “It’s not like that! It was a... a sort of a last minute thing, is all—we made plans barely a week before the ball, and you and I didn’t really talk that week except the one night you got the big news—and, well, what’s a weekend party plan next to news like *that*...” He trails off awkwardly. Then starts again: “He’s not the ‘new Sir Pentious.’ He’s not replacing you, my friend.”

Sir Pentious

He doesn't move away at all when Al scoots closer, which is a good sign, but he's still having a hard time making (all) eye contact, sighing again....

"HE ISSSSN'T?"

Alastor

“No! *You’re* still my best friend, and that’s not about to change! Sure, you’ve—got quite a bit in common—and I appreciate what you’ve got in common—“ oh now he’s embarrassed, he’s looking away, “—but I told you once that I like you for reasons that are unique to *you,* and that’s still true.”

Sir Pentious

Tongue flicks.... He looks at Alastor again, hood kind of droopy as his hands wring together.....

"WE ARE *RATHER* DIFFERENT, YESSS. SSSSIMILAR IN LOOKSSS, QUINTESSENTIALLY DIFFERENT UPBRINGINGSSS."

Alastor

“Different upbringings, different tastes, different hobbies, different demeanors... I can’t imagine him ever tackling me in a hotel lobby!” Alastor laughs. “If I only hung out with him, I’d miss *you.*”

Sir Pentious

Oh. He tilts his head a bit.... Moves a little closer, as subtly as a snake can... And bumps shoulders with Alastor.

..... CLEARS HIS THROAT, "*WELL*, YOU SSSTILL SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME EARLIER! I COULD HAVE AT THE VERY *LEASSST* HELPED YOU *PREPARE* TO HANG OUT WITH A SSSSSNAKE!"

Alastor

Alastor bumps shoulders back. "And what kind of preparation would you have given me? Don't I know how to hang out with snakes?"

Sir Pentious

He looks smug, throwing an arm around the other's shoulders.

"DO YOU REALLY? SSSOMETIMESSS YOU BLUNDER ABOUT HALFHAZARDLY! HAHAHA!"

He's teasing, and to prove so, he winks.

Alastor

He flings an arm around Sir Pentious's shoulders. "Well, you haven't excommunicated me yet! I must be doing *something* right!" He laughs. This is so much *simpler.* It's a relief.

Sir Pentious

PRR PRR PRR PRR. The relief is MUTUAL... Penny wouldn't have been able to handle losing his best friend to another Pentious.

He CACKLES, "WELL, THAT COULD CHANGE! IF THE GUMBO ISN'T UP TO MY SSSTANDARDSSS, I COULD DROP YOU THROUGH A TRAP DOOR!!"

Alastor

Now he's got *both* arms around Sir Pentious. "Try it and you're coming with me!"

Sir Pentious

Prr prr prr! That cackling continues, Sir Pentious flicking his tongue at the other. Flip flip flip flip.

"YOU ARE *NOT* SSSSTRONG ENOUGH TO TAKE ME DOWN! I RECALL CRUSHING YOU WITH MY ENTIRE WEIGHT!"

Alastor

"That's when I was playing fair! Drop me down a trap door, and I start calling my friends! Anyway, what *I* recall is fighting you to a draw."

Sir Pentious

He gives a *face*, "YOUR MEMORY MUSSST BE *FAULTY!* BUT WHATEVER, TELL ME ABOUT THE BALL, THEN! RARE TO SSEE YOU GET INTO SSSUCH A HUNGOVER SSSTATE!"

Alastor

"Oh." Alastor is immediately awkward! "I shouldn't have drunk that much. I wish I hadn't. But, well." He shoves aside the awkward and tries to act normal. "It was a masquerade ball! Either black tie or costumes. Not *this* costume," he flaps an arm to set all the fabric fringe rustling, "but a proper one. Uh—dinner and a drag show for the first half—Mardi Gras balls always have a presentation of the royal court by the krewe that put on the ball and they're always so *dull,* I found us a ball by a gay krewe that actually did something interesting with it. And a dance for the second half of the ball."

Sir Pentious

Sir Pentious enjoys the rustling sound, watching that wacky costume flutter about.

"A *GAY* KREWE? HMM, MUSSST HAVE BEEN MUCH MORE COLORFUL, FLAMBOYANTLY SSSO." You're one to talk, Penny. "A DANCE, A DRAG SHOW, AND MASQUERADE!! WHAT WERE YOUR COSSSTUMESSS? DID I HEAR THAT YOU WERE A PIRATE OR SSSSSOMETHING?"

Alastor

"My goodness, yes! Some of the best costumes I've seen in years! Some of the krewe's costumes had decorations so wide the tables nearest the runway had to duck!" Alastor laughs. "He, uh—wanted to do a sea serpent theme. Obviously I can't pull off the 'serpent' part very well, so we cobbled together something somewhat piratical for me so we'd match. Mainly, it meant a lot of blue and green and pearls."

Sir Pentious

Sea serpent. Of course he would. Penny's face wrinkles a little at the memory of swimming, before he rubs it off, "OH? I IMAGINE THAT SIR PENTIOUS LOOKED RATHER STUNNING AS A SEA SERPENT! WE HAVE NATURAL GOOD LOOKSSSS." Probably not. the most smooth thing he's said, since he's aware of Alastor's crush BUT he wasn't *trying* to tease him, just speaking earnestly.

"I SHOULD LIKE TO SSSEE YOUR PIRATE ATTIRE! I IMAGINE YOU HAD A MASSSSK ON? CAN'T HAVE THE ENTIRE BALLROOM RUNNING IN FEAR AT THE SSSIGHT OF YOU!"

Alastor

The awkward's back! As well as embarrassment. Alastor has to look away. "He did, yes."

On to the next topic. "Oh, of course. I always go to Mardi Gras events in a mask! I'll pull the whole thing out sometime soon to show you."

Sir Pentious

HEE HEE. "OH, I WOULD LIKE THAT!" Though he's tilting his head a little at Alastor's head turning away. "WELL, IT SSSOUNDSSS LIKE YOU HAD FUN. DID YOU DANCE?"

Alastor

The slightest wince. "... We did, yes." He's just gonna twist his hands together in his lap and fidget. "By that point we were both too drunk to dance particularly *well,* but..."

Sir Pentious

It's very weird to watch this colorful paper mache of a man fidget his hands together. Sir Pentious leans his head in CLOSER, as he is ought to do, and flicks his tongue. Blelelele.

"YOU DON'T SSSSEEM HAPPY ABOUT IT?"

Alastor

"I kissed him." The words tumble out like he's confessing to a long-secret murder. His smile's hanging on by a thread. "*He* kissed *me.* There was reciprocal kissing, is what I'm trying to— We kissed." Having finally gotten this heinous crime off his chest, he buries his face in his hands.

Sir Pentious

,

Sir Pentious' tongue snaps back into his mouth much like measuring tape. His eyes are wide as dinner plates, and his brow is only ascending higher and higher, the longer he's spending processing *that.*

Alastor

"*I know.*" Alastor doesn't even have to look up, he can hear that awkward silence. "It was the end of the night, we were both completely inebriated—*God*, I hope he doesn't remember it..."

Sir Pentious

He's still processing what to say--mostly he's trying to imagine what it must have looked like for Alastor and Telly to mash their faces together. He *RESISTS* the face scrunch, expertly.

Penny opens his mouth, then closes it again.... then GRABS Alastor by the shoulders, "YOU *KISSsssssssED???*"

Alastor

"*Yes!* I'm sorr— Why am I apologizing to you?" He squirms out of the shoulder grip, don't look at his face, he's miserable. "I couldn't even go—how long have I known him—less than two months?!—without doing something unforgivably stupid!"

Sir Pentious

He's not sure if this feels like a breath of *relief* or like he's filling with *apprehension.* He can clearly see the alarm on Alastor's--well. Body language. Penny shakes his head, looking up at his hat, which appears to be looking down at him like *dont look at ME!!! IDK!!!*

"HAVE YOU *SSSS*POKEN WITH HIM SSSINCE???"

Alastor

"Just once. Just a generic 'how's your headache, I had fun,' no specifics. He asked if he left his fan with me, he didn't remember. That was also at the end of the night, so maybe he forgot." His head is in his hands again and his fingers are in his hair.

Sir Pentious

Penny considers... petting Alastor's head but after word like that, you know. Maybe that would be a bad idea. His tongue flicks in concern, and he can't help but think back-- before Christmas, in fact, when Alastor had told him that the only one he'd had a crush on was himself-- that is, Penley Dreadful, *not* Pentell.

It wasn't necessarily upset he was feeling, but... it was cause for concern, here. For once in his life, Sir Pentious considered someone else's feelings, instead of just his own.

"ARE YOU... FEELING *GUILTY* OVER THISSS, ALASSSTOR?"

Alastor

"Yes." The word sort of comes out like a choked croak. "Guilt and regret and terror and... and grief, and..." Just curling up farther. His head is *under* his hands now.

Sir Pentious

He reaches a hand up move some of Al's hair out of his face, at the very least....

"YOU MENTIONED IT WAS *RECIPROCATED*, YESSS??? CLEARLY, THAT SSSAYS A LOT TO *ME*. WE SIR PENTIOUSESSSS ARE NOTHING IF NOT DELIBERATE IN OUR ACTIONSSSS, INEBRIATED OR NOT...."

Alastor

"*You* kiss me. On the forehead, sure, but—*his* weren't on the lips either until I went and..." It's all garbled noises and radio static for a moment as Alastor rubs his eyelids with his thumbs. "It could be platonic! He could have meant it platonically! And what if it *wasn't* platonic?" Alastor asks this like it's the most horrifying possibility of all.

Sir Pentious

Penny looks to the right. Then the left. Then back at Alastor.

"THEN YOU MAKE A DATE?"

Alastor

"*Then I get smited by the god of death* that he's *dating,* Sir Pentious! *He is dating!* He's in a relationship! I've become the kind of person who kisses a taken man!" A pause. "... Smited? Smote?"

Sir Pentious

*SMitten?* Wait no, don't say that one out loud.

Sir Pentious tilts his head, tongue flicking, "HMMM .... YESSS, THAT'SSS A THING, ISN'T IT?" What *does* one do in that situation? .... But more importantly...

"... WHY DID YOU KISSsss HIM?"

Alastor

"Because I was drunk." Surely that explains everything.

Sir Pentious

".... NO, BUT...." How to... phrase this delicately................ "BECAUSE HE ISSS SSSSIR PENTIOUS?? OR BECAUSE HE ISSSS *TELLY?*"

Alastor

He hesitates before answering; but he can't hesitate for long. He knows the answer, he's just ashamed to give it. "Because he's Sir Pentious."

Sir Pentious

Penny isn't able to hide the sorrowful look that crosses his expression... not out of his own sadness, but rather, *concern*. He's looking off to the side, without turning his head, navigating his way through thoughts.

".... IF *TELLY* KISSED YOU IN RETURN, REssssCIPROCATED, AS IT WERE, THEN IT LIKELY ISSS NOT BECAUSE YOU'RE *ALASSSTOR*. HE DOESSSS NOT GET ALONG WITH THE RADIO DEMON FROM HISsssss OWN HELL." Another pause. ".... IT'Sssss BECAUSE YOU ARE *YOU.*"

... He clears his throat, "AT LEASSSSsssT THAT'SSS MY SSSPECULATION ON THE MATTER. THAT MAN WEARSSSS HISSSS HEART ON HISSSS SLEEVE, FROM THE TIMESSS I'VE SSSSPENT WITH HIM."

Alastor

"I know." He finally drops his hands. He's not smiling. Not even close. "He does. He's—tender and open and sweet—and none of those words are compliments! It's not what I want! ... Except when I'm around him, and then..." He shrugs helplessly. "I hate this."

Sir Pentious

His head swivels, cobra-like in every way, and Sir Pentious pets down his hood, thinking.

"... ALASSsssTOR, I THINK YOU REALLY NEED TO SSSORT OUT YOUR FEELINGSSS ON THE MATTER, BECAUSE YOU COULD BE HEADED FOR SsssOMETHING RATHER DANGEROUSSSS. WE SSSIR PENTIOUSSSSESSS DON'T ACCEPT HEARTBREAK *GENTLY.*" Tongue flick. Oh fuck he's goddawful at being comforting, but what does one SAY?

"AND IF YOU ARE NOT INTERESSSSTED IN *HIM*, THEN YOU NEED TO TELL HIM THAT, TOO. OR EXPLAIN THAT YOU WOULD RATHER REMAIN FRIENDSSSS. BUT IF YOU *ARE* INTERESSSTED IN A MAN WHO IS ALSO IN A RELATIONSHIP... A MAN FOR HISSS OWN MERITSSS, AND NOT JUST ONE WHO HAPPENSSS TO LOOK LIKE.... WELL, YOU KNOW." Cough, "THEN YOU NEED TO TALK ABOUT THAT EVEN MORE! BETTER TO *KNOW* THAN *NOT.*"

Alastor

“I’ve been trying to sort out my feelings for the last two days! Longer than *that,* actually,” he laughs bitterly, “but it’s an emergency now. Did you know that it’s damn hard to think logically and feel emotions at the same time?” Cue that “the more you know” sound effect.

“It’s not *just* that he *looks* the same, it’s—you know, the same—same *mind,* same ambitions, same inventiveness, same laugh...” He crosses his arms tightly over his stomach and hunches forward again. “But I don’t want—that, with him. That is—I *do* want it—but I don’t want to want it. I want to not want it. I want to shut it *off.*”

Sir Pentious

Penny is reminded of the things Alastor told him, when he'd BIT the radio demon and Alastor's apologies upon apologies tumbled out. How he hated being attracted to Sir Pentious, how he hated feeling like this. That's right, he hated this feeling. His tongue flicks in thought and... he reaches a hand over to place it on Alastor's shoulder. Carefully......

"WELL, AL, I DON'T THINK YOU *CAN* SHUT IT OFF. YOU SSSTILL HAVE THE CAPACITY TO FEEL THISSS WAY IN HELL OF ALL PLACESSS, THEN IT'SSS JUSST GOING TO HAVE TO SSTAY. MOVING FORWARD, WHAT ISSS THERE TO BE DONE? YOU DON'T WANT TO WANT IT, BUT WHAT IF TELLY WANTSSS IT?" He doesn't even talk about Hel. He's NEVER MET HER, and he's not about to talk about a third party he's never met.

Alastor

He responds to the touch by immediately sitting up just enough to lean against Sir Pentious. *Fwump.* That’s the whole weight of the Radio Demon against Penny’s shoulder. “I know. I’ve been trying to shut it off for fifty-four years, if it hasn’t worked by now... You’ve made a cringe-powered weapon, can’t you make an attraction-powered one? Just, jam a couple of probes into my skull and fire until it’s all been drained out?” One corner of his mouth twitches up, haha he made joke—but it wilts again. He’s not really joking. He actually wants that.

What if Telly *does* want it? What does Alastor do then? “Block him on voxblr, leave the hotel, change my broadcasting frequency, and never speak to him again.”

Sir Pentious

Sir Pentious puts his arm around Alastor, encouraging him to lean against him as he slips his tail around his friend, even as they sat on the couch. His face splits in a grin, "I'VE BEEN *WANTING* TO TURN YOU INTO A GUN, BUT PERHAPSSS NOT SSSOMETHING FOR *THAT* PURPOSE."

The grin lessens, and he shakes his head.

"I CANNOT AGREE WITH THAT. RUNNING AWAY WILL NOT HELP YOU, AND IF ANYTHING, I CANNOT ALLOW YOU TO HURT THAT MAN LIKE THAT."

Alastor

He lets out a long groan. It’s more of a whine. He lets out an extremely long groan whine.

“You’re right.”

Although he doesn’t *like* it.

“All right, Sir Plato, if you’re going to ask me questions that you already have the answers to—what *is* there to be done? What *do* I do?”

Sir Pentious

He looks so smug. Let him sit here with the perfect >:) face.

And he turns to Alastor.

"YOU ARE GOING TO TALK TO TELLY, ADDRESS WHAT HAPPENED, AND EXPLAIN YOUR INTENTIONSSSS. ISN'T THAT FAIR? NOW, IF YOU HAPPEN TO REALIZE THAT MAYBE YOU *WOULD* LIKE TO HAVE SSSOMETHING *LESSsss* PLATONIC, IT'SSS WORTH THINKING OVER IN YOUR MIND."

Was it weird to imagine Alastor banging an alt of himself? Absolutely. But knowing that Alastor already had a crush on Snakes BEFORE himself, made it a little less weird. As long as he didn't hear the details of whatever they could get up to in the future, then that would be GOOD ENOUGH FOR HIM.

"BUT, IF YOU ARE ssssCERTAIN THISSS IS NOT sssSOMETHING YOU WANT-- THEN YOU OWE IT TO TELLY TO BE *HONESssssT.*" He remembers holding Telly in his arms, the way that snake sobbed from every eye as he talked about being mocked, about being hurt over and over. That moment, plus the other's strange insistence on Penny swimming, was enough to endear the smaller snake to Penny. "YOU WERE HONESSST WITH ME, AND WE ARE SSSTILL FRIENDSSS."

Alastor

Alastor nods thoughtfully.

He thinks that over.

He shakes his head. “No, I don’t think I’m going to do any of that. Thank you for the excellent advice, I’m rejecting all of it.” He pulls up his knees and wraps his arms around them. Fetal position piñata man. “Everything’s been more stressful since you found out. I don’t want that again. Have any advice that lets me rewind three days and go off to the ball with a flask of ginger ale and white grape juice so I don’t do anything stupid?”

Sir Pentious

FACE SCRUNCH.

"WHAT DO YOU *MEAN* EVERYTHINGSSSS BEEN MORE SSSTRESSFUL? FOR *WHO?* FOR YOU????" He folds his arms now, huffing, "YOU MAY NOT LIKE IT, BUT I KNOW NOW, AND I'M *GLAD* I KNOW. AND MAYBE THAT DOESN'T MEAN MUCH TO YOU, BUT IT PUTSSS ME AT EASE!" Sir Pentious shakes his head. "YOU *KISSED* THE MAN, NOW OWN UP TO IT, ALASSSTOR!"

Alastor

“Well, if it hasn’t been stressful for *you,* then yes, for me! But I’m glad that having my deepest secrets sitting naked on the couch next to us every time we interact has been a walk in the park for you!” He crosses his arms tighter and scowls at his knees. “He can own up to it first, he started it.”

Sir Pentious

OKAY, WELL, HE'S NOT GOING TO RESPOND TO THAT, if Alastor wants  to be a PISS BABY, Pentious isn't going to even DIGNIFY THAT with an answer. His arms fold tighter, and he scowls, too.

"WHAT DO YOU *MEAN* HE SSSTARTED IT? BY BEING A SSSIR PENTIOUS? YOU TOLD ME THAT *YOU* KISSED *HIM* AND THAT *HE* RECIPROCATED! IF ANYTHING, *YOU* SSSTARTED IT!"

Alastor

“He kissed my mask! Twice! On the nose *and* the cheek! And on the lips before that, but we were both wearing masks then, and we were doing an improv dramatic dialogue as Greek gods then, so I don’t know if it counts—but the nose and the cheek were all him!” And his voice is edging back into panic as he reports this.

Sir Pentious

Well this was weird. Is this how everyone else felt all the time? Being able to just clearly recognize something as romantic or flirting, while he consistently never saw anything weird about it? Intent always had a lot to do with that, but here........... I mean.

"...." Penny turns to Alastor, brow raised as he leans in close and rests his elbow against the back of the couch, his head resting on his palm, "I THINK HE'S INTO YOU, MAN."

Alastor

“You kiss my forehead all the time!” It’s happened like, three times. *All the time.* “AND I had a mask on, it doesn’t count!” He turns to squeeze Sir Pentious’s shoulder and give him a desperate look. “Don’t ruin this for me, I don’t want him to be into me!”

Sir Pentious

"I'VE NEVER KISSED YOUR FOREHEAD WHILE *DANCING* AT A *GAY MARDIS GRAS MASQUERADE BALL* WHILE DRESS-ED LIKE A SEA SERPENT AND YOU LIKE A PIRATE!!!" His hands FLAP! "I AM NOT ATTEMPTING TO RUIN ANYTHING, ALASSSTOR, I WANT TO HELP YOU, BUT I DON'T WANT YOU TO SSSELF IMMOLATE OUT OF *FEAR!*"

Alastor

DEEP BREATH IN. “Right. Yes. Thanks. I’m... very good at self-immolating out of fear.” Deep breath out. He sinks back on the couch again.

Sir Pentious

SIGH. What to DO about this. Penny presses two of his talons against his forehead in thought.

"KISSING YOUR FOREHEAD IS AN ACT OF PLATONIC FRIENDSHIP FROM ME, AND MOSSSSST CERTAINLY NOT ROMANTICALLY INTENDED. I CANNOT KNOW WHAT TELLY WAS GOING FOR, BUT RECIPROCATION OF A KISS ON THE MOUTH DOES SSSTRIKE ME AS MUCH DIFFERENT...."

He puts his tail on Al again,  "SSSO WHAT ISSS IT YOU ARE AFRAID OF? HEL?? THAT SSSEEMS A REASONABLE THING, THOUGH SSSTRANGE OF TELLY TO JUSSSST.... CHEAT ON HIS GIRLFRIEND LIKE THAT." Penny you are NOT helping.

Alastor

“He definitely kissed me first, but they might have been platonic friendship kisses. He might have only reciprocated on the mouth because *I* kissed *him* on the mouth. And, again, we were both very drunk.”

He drums his fingers on Sir Pentious’s tail. That’s Alastor’s tail now. “I’m afraid of being one of those lovelorn googoo-eyed idiots who’s so desperate for some no-account loser’s affection that they’re willing to be the secret side piece. I’m afraid of that dazed, drugged, brainless look Shirley Jones gets on her face when she spontaneously decides Robert Preston has switched from pain in the posterior to walking dreamboat. I’m afraid of my happiness being dependent on someone else’s happiness. I’m afraid of what happens to me if anything ever happens to him. I’m afraid of what happens to *him* if everyone finds out what what he means to me. I’m afraid of... losing my personality in another person.” His fingers slowly still. “Getting smote by a goddess is somewhere low on the list, but if I can’t get out of this, I think it might be a mercy.”

Sir Pentious

Sir Pentious listens, fingers laced together as Alastor is very honest in regards to his fears... Hmmm....

"THEN PERHAPSSS YOU SHOULD TELL HIM THAT YOU CANNOT DO IT, THAT YOU WOULD RATHER REMAIN PLATONIC, THAT DESPITE YOUR.." He thinks. "INCLINATIONSSS? IT WOULD BE TOO AWFUL FOR YOU, SSSSPECIFICALLY BECAUSE OF RELATIONSHIPSSS NOT BEING YOUR THING." It wouldn't be a HAPPY ending, but it would be an honest one.

"BECAUSE EVERYTHING YOU DESCRIBED IS.... WELL, MANY OF THEM SSSSOUND LIKE A FEAR OF BEING VULNERABLE..... I ONCE HAD SSSIMILAR FEARSSSS MYSSSSELF..... BUT SSSINCE BEING WITH VALERA, I'VE NEVER FELT MORE SECURE IN WHO I AM." He's playing with his ring now, smiling at it fondly.

Alastor

Alastor watches Sir Pentious play with his ring for a moment. Then shakes his head and looks away. “It’s not vulnerability, it’s... Here’s the thing, I know exactly who I am and what I’m about. Or at least,” scoff, “I did *before* I felt like this for the first time. Whenever I feel like this—I don’t feel like myself anymore. I feel like a stranger. Whoever that man is, I don’t want to be him. I’ve never felt *less* secure in who I am.”

Sir Pentious

A soft exhale.... Sir Pentious shakes his head. "THEN IT SSSEEMSSS OBVIOUSSS TO ME. BE HONEST OF YOUR INTENTIONSSSS, AND HAVE SSSOME SSSELF CONTROL! OTHERWISE I FEEL LIKE THIS IS THE KIND OF SITUATION THAT COULD SSSSPIRAL OUT OF CONTROL."

Alastor

“And what’s the ‘obvious’ solution to you? Because you told me I should tell him I don’t want anything with him, and then in the same breath told me that falling in love was the greatest thing that ever happened to your sense of security and I’m just scared of being vulnerable.” He leans into Sir Pentious. Bump. “Are you telling me my intentions ought to be to go for it, or to run for the hills?”

Sir Pentious

"YOU TELL ME THAT YOU DON'T WANT IT, AND I'M NOT SURE IF ITSSS BECAUSE OF A FEAR OF *CHANGE* OR ACTUALLY NOT WANTING IT!"

He folds his arms, "THEY ARE NOT THE SSSAME. BUT IF YOU ACTUALLY DO NOT WANT IT, YOU NEED TO BE DIRECT WITH TELLY!! BECAUSE IF YOU'RE NOT, I CAN ONLY IMAGINE THERE WILL BE CONSSSSEQUENCESSSSS."

Alastor

“It’s because of *actually* not—“ He stops. He thinks about it. That’s too reductive. He sighs and tries again. “There’s a part of me that... wants... to be with him. There is. That’s the part of me that’s... *attracted*. The rest of me doesn’t *like* the part of me that’s attracted. If I could choose between ‘being with him’ and ‘not being attracted,’ I would *prefer* to not be attracted... but there are different parts of me that want both.”

He shrugs heavily. “It’s not a fear of change—a fear of *change* means a fear of the *process,* doesn’t it? Dreading all the work and upheaval. I can handle change. I *like* change—external change. What I’m afraid of is changing *inside.* Looking in the mirror and—and not recognizing myself anymore!” A pause. “... Although I don’t think I’ve recognized myself in a long time, anyway.” Another pause. “And whoever I’d turn into—he probably wouldn’t care once all this was over, would he? He’ll probably be happy to be whoever he is. The person who was afraid would be long gone.”

He glances over to catch Sir Pentious’s gaze, and then rolls his eyes, as if they’re together mocking some third person’s terrible romantic quandary. “Well, I was trying make things *less* confusing! I did a swell job of that, didn’t I?” Cue the laugh track. “Here’s the one thing I know for sure—I don’t want to hurt him. Whatever else I do, I want to do it in a way that won’t harm him.”

Sir Pentious

The laugh track has Hattie looking amused, even while Penny is giving Alastor the HAIRY EYE BALL.

He turns to look upon this colorful paper disaster man, from head to toe, then jabs him in the shoulder with a talon.

"I KNOW FOR SSSSCERTAIN THAT YOU HATE THE MAN YOU WERE, AND ARE. EVERY SSSSTORY YOU'VE TOLD ME ABOUT YOURSELF IS *LACED* WITH HOW MUCH YOU DISLIKE YOURSELF. SO THEN WHY *NOT* CHANGE?"

He spreads his own hand against his chest, splaying his fingers, "I UNDERSTAND, IN THAT CAPACITY! YOU KNOW, I HAVE ENOUGH SELF LOATHING TO CREATE A WHOLE NEW MAN! BUT THE MAN I'VE *BECOME* HAS A BETTER TRACK RECORD THAN THE ONE BEFORE. YOU KNOW I HAVEN'T BEEN HUNGOVER IN *MONTHSSSSS.*"   he looks so proud of himself.

"AND! I HAVEN'T ENTERTAINED THOUGHTSSS OF SSSNOGGING A 45 CALIBER!" Look how he preens.

"WHEN I *THINK* OF WHO I WAS BEFORE VALERA.... I DO NOT WANT TO EVEN *ENTERTAIN* THE FANTASY. I'VE GROWN MORE *POWERFUL* THAN I WAS BEFORE." He bumps shoulders with Al, "IN MY *EXPERT* OPINION, YOU OUGHT TO EMBRACE THE CHANGE.... YOU'VE ALREADY SEEN WHAT HAPPENSSS IF YOU AVOID IT.... RATHER *DESSSSTRUCTIVELY* SSSO. WHY NOT GO THE OTHER WAY???"

Alastor

“I do *not* hate the man I was!” He places a hand over his chest indignantly. “I *like* the man I was! Quite a bit, in fact. The man I hate is the one I became after—”

*After I fell in love,* is what he almost says. But that isn’t true, is it. Because he fell in and immediately avoided it. *Destructively so.* Alastor actually has no idea what he’s like when he’s *in love*—only when he’s *heartbroken.*

“... after I ran away.”

Alastor’s damn sure he won’t get more powerful. He’s pretty damn sure Sir Pentious didn’t get more powerful, either—Alastor would bet money that it’s a placebo effect. He doesn’t believe those feelings *do* that. But Sir Pentious got one thing right, Alastor hates who he’s been ever since running from that opportunity. Hasn’t he wondered, a hundred thousand times, how everything would be different if he’d made the other choice? Hasn’t he longed for a second chance?

“You’re right.” Deep breath, heavy sigh. “There’s no good reason not to tr— Oh sh—“ BEEP “—he’s still got a girlfriend.” He flops back on the couch. DAMMIT. “Okay, I draw the line at being a home wrecker or a secret affair! I’m not going to do that!”

Sir Pentious

Look at how smug he looks.

You're right he DOES KNOW HOW RIGHT HE IS. The smugness is STARTLED by the BEEEEEP,

And he rests his entire weight on Al. Fwump.

"THEN YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO *BLOODY* TALK TO HIM!!"

Alastor

FWUMP. He jerks half upright under the sudden assault and then lays back again to rant at the ceiling. “But! What! If! He’s! Not interested! And then he’ll know *I* am! And I’m *right* back with him where I am with you. Except worse, because he and I aren’t as close as you and I are.”

Sir Pentious

More snake on Alastor. He's become a cinnamon bun. Loaf. "HMMM, THAT DOESSSNT SOUND ACCURATE, I DO NOT RECALL EVER *RECIPROCATING A KISS* AFTER GOING TO A GODDAMN GAY BALL!"

Alastor

“Fine, next time I’ll invite you to the gay ball and we’ll see how it goes.” Laugh track. “I kissed him and I’m closer to you than I am to him, and you’re just going to have to deal with that knowledge.”

Sir Pentious 

"ITSSS A DIFFERENT KIND OF RELATIONSHIP !!" He presses his HAND to Al's face.

"I AM NOT ATTRACTED TO YOU!!! BUT I AM INTERESTED IN BEING YOUR VERY EXCELLENT PAL."

Alastor

“*I* know that! So don’t *you* say you’re less close than he is.” He’s gonna test his luck. He’s gonna. Lick that hand.

Sir Pentious 

First of all, he's wearing gloves.

Second of all,

HE MAKES SUCH A SOUND!!! PULLS OFF HATTIE. AND SHOVES IT OVER AL'S HEAD.

THOONK.

Alastor

He cackles laughing, and the hat only muffles him for a second before he's got it adjusted to where he can wear it and keep on laughing. Can he see? No. That's optional.

His look is now complete.

Sir Pentious

Hattie looks entertained, and that's all that matters. Sir Pentious leans back and *HUFFS.*

"ANYWAY!! I'M NOT *WORRIED*, ACTUALLY, BECAUSE I THINK IT'SSSSS GOOD FOR YOU... THAT ISS, IF IT ISN'T A HOME WRECKER SSSSITUATION. THAT WOULD BE ALSSSSO ON TELLY."

Alastor

"Fingers crossed," Alastor mutters. "It certainly doesn't feel good for me." But he's got his smile back on now, that's something.

He reached up and taps Hattie's brim. "Hey, you can shapeshift, can't you? Think you can do something to match my costume?"

Sir Pentious

Hattie looks down at Alastor, wiggles its brim, and then transforms into..! a crown. Good. This is what you wanted, right? Sir Pentious blinks, "ARE THE FESSSTIVITIESSSS SSSTILL GOING ON, THEN? OR ARE YOU JUSST PROUD OF YOUR COSSSTUME?"

Alastor

That's definitely not what he wanted, but he'll take it. "No, they're pretty much over. I just didn't change clothes before coming over."

Sir Pentious

SNRK.

Sir Pentious slithers off the couch, going to inspect the GUMBO..... THEN STOPS, turning abruptly.

"DO YOU HAPPEN TO HAVE THE RAY GUN FAN WITH YOU? I AM CURIOUSSSS OF IT'SSSS CONSSSTRUCTION!"

Alastor

"Oh! Yes! Hold on!" He unzips his ridiculous top—he's wearing his normal shirt underneath it—and fishes out the fan from an inner jacket pocket. "I haven't had a chance to test it out yet! Maybe sometime tomorrow."

Sir Pentious

Excited clapping of his talons... He takes the apparatus carefully, looking it over. It does open like a nice fan, and he's going to be playing with it for a while, finding out the way it fires without having to fire it!

"THISSSS IS VERY WELL MADE. OF COURSSSE IT WAS MADE BY NONE OTHER THAN SSSSIR PENTIOUSSSS. YOU DON'T GET CLASS AND SSSTYLE LIKE THIS ANYMORE!"

Alastor

"Isn't it?" Alastor's expression brightens. "It's quite the clever contraption! Both form *and* function." He leans closer to watch as Sir Pentious figures out how it works.

Sir Pentious

He's not going to FIRE IT in here, but he has figured out how to change it to firing Mode.

PRR prr prr prr PRR PRR! Penny just LOVES things that are secretly weapons. He hands it back to Alastor.

"THISSSS ISSS A PRECIOUSSSS GIFT, ALASSSTOR. BE SURE TO THANK YOUR BEAU *GRACIOUSSSSLY.*" He winks, teasing. Hee hoo.

Alastor

He’s smiling goofily when Sir Pentious changes the mode, delighted just at seeing it work. He loves these things.

But his expression snaps back down to his default minimal smile at the word *beau.* “He’s not m—” Stop. Glare. Oh, Alastor sees what Sir Pentious is doing. “You know what, maybe I will! Something a little like this?” He flings an arm around Sir Pentious’s shoulders to support himself, snaps open the fan, and fans himself like a dainty Southern belle fighting off a swoon. “‘Oh, *Sir Pentious*, I can’t *begin* to tell you what such a gift *means* to me! Oh, to be able to *hold* and *cherish* one of your own, hand-crafted weapons, at any time I want! My heart *flutters* with the—‘ No, no, I can’t keep this up, it got too weird.”

Sir Pentious

FACE SCWUNCH, but he sees what ALASTOR is doing and he makes an AAAA-HAAA type face,

"WELL, OF COURSE!! YOUR HEART DOESN'T FLUTTER!! NYA HA HA!"

Alastor

He earned The Scwunch, he’s counting this as a victory.

“It’s as dead a piece of meat as you’ll find!” He’s got that melodramatic Southern belle-ish voice back on. “I suppose this fan will have to do the fluttering *for* my heart.” Flutter flutter flutter. Just to solidify his victory.

Sir Pentious

"MAY YOU *ACCIDENTALLY* SHOOT YOUR FOOT OFF, ALASSSTOR!" Shit eating GRIN.

Alastor

“Joke’s on you, it can’t fire while it’s open.” Pause. “I don’t think it can.” He closes it and looks it over. Hm.

Sir Pentious

HEE HEE HEE.

"DID HE NOT PRESENT YOU WITH THE MANUAL? NYA HA HA!"

Gumbo time.... He's flicking his tongue at it.

Alastor

"Well, he showed me how to switch it from fan to gun and back, how much more do I need to know?" He opens it again and tries to see if there's a way to activate the gun mechanism... then decided that's probably a bad idea to do inside and airship, shuts it, and puts it away. "That gumbo's no New York knockoff! That's some genuine Cajun cuisine—and half the ingredients were alive this morning!"

Sir Pentious

A GOOD IDEA, Alastor. Please do NOT shoot the thing while inside of the airship. Sir Pentious would not appreciate that AT ALL! Alastor starting to talk about the food in question has him remembering the trip to New York, and the food he didn't really eat too much. He turns and smirks at the radio deerman.

"HA! WERE THEY. HOW DELIGHTFUL. I KNOW YOUR COOKING, ALASSSTOR, YOU UNDERSSSSTAND MY TASSSTESSS QUITE WELL!" He's going to retrieve a spoon from inside his coat (yep) and dip it in to take a TASTE.

Alastor

Alastor beams at the praise! "It's not entirely *my* cooking—Mardi Gras gumbo is a communal thing, everyone in town contributes a little something to the pot—but I wouldn't have brought you some if I didn't think it would meet your tastes!"

Alastor completely fails to register the fact that Sir Pentious was carrying a spoon inside his coat for some reason. Not weird at all.

Sir Pentious

He's a LITTLE SUSPECT of that comment BUT he will trust his friend here.... And with a mouthful of gumbo (GAOMPH), he DOESN'T unbite! Instead, he pulls the spoon from his lips and smiles *wide*, flicking his tongue.

"MM! THISSS IS VERY TASSSTY!" Listen to those pleased *hums*, even the tip of his tail is wagging.... Time for another mouthful.

Alastor

Alastor beams wider! He's defended his good friend credentials for the day. "Glad I was finally able to get you some *proper* gumbo."

Sir Pentious

He's going to scoop it and offer some to Alastor,.... Then he GRINS REALLY BIG, PURRING.

"YOU SHOULD MAKE THISSSS FOR TELLY, SHOULD THINGSSSS PROGRESSS FAVORABLY."

Alastor

Alastor leans over to take a bite—and then pauses with his mouth open. "Ah." Awkward fidget! "I'm—already cooking for him, actually. And he said he wants to try New Orleanian cuisine, so I'm sure I'll be making gumbo sooner rather than later." He looks away all embarrassed.

Sir Pentious

NO LOOKING AWAY. Pentious SWIVELS the spoon around to bump against Alastor's lips, and should he bite down, Penny will TURN his head FORCEFULLY to GRIN! TO! HIS! FACE!

Alastor

He *does* fall for it and bite. He *does* get turned around to face Sir Pentious's face. ~~You can't do that to him, it's hot.~~

He lets go and leans back. "What?"

Sir Pentious

TONGUE FLICK.

He takes the spoon to dip it back into the gumbo, and starts to LOUDLY hum The Wedding Song.

You know the one.

Alastor

He DOES know the one. He makes a series of undignified flustered static noises. "Don't read too much into it! He needed somebody who actually *knows* how to cook helping him out. His kitchen is staffed by eggs."

Sir Pentious

Look at Penny, he's daaancing, swaying from side to side!

"YESSS, IT WAS DEFINITELY BECAUSE OF THE GOODNESS OF YOUR HEART, *NOT* CAUSE YOU *FANCY* HIM, HMMM HMMM~"

Alastor

"Oh, come now, it's hardly like that! I cook for you all the time, don't I?" A pause. "I realized the flaw in that argument as soon as I said it, you don't need to point it out."

Sir Pentious

HE'S SMILING LIKE SUCH A PIECE OF SHIT. LOOK AT HIM. *LOOK AT HIM.*

Alastor

Alastor draws himself up with great dignity. "I cook for *everybody.* I'm keeping one of my alternates fed too."

Sir Pentious

Sir Pentious takes out a nail file from his coat. *He has so much stuff in there, apparently.* And he starts to slide it against his claws, purring, "YESS, OF COURSSSE! BUT, YOU DIDN'T SSSNOG THAT ONE AT A GAY BALL, DID YOU?" HEE HOO. Look how pleased he is. Playful.........His body is rolling up like curly fries.

Alastor

... Why does he keep a nail file with his spoon?

Alastor tips his chin up. "I most certainly did not, nor do I want to! Which is conclusive proof that I do not feed friends because I *fancy* them!" The embarrassment is genuine but the big show of burying it under a layer of self-righteous indignation is just that: a show. All right, okay, he's the entertainment right now, he'll play his part. On some level it's a relief they can discuss this at all without it being a giant wedge jammed between the two of them; the sharp point of the wedge has been shunted off to the side, to point at some third party that isn't present. He'll take the hit to his dignity in exchange for the reduced pressure.

"You look like a spring, all coiled up like that." The corners of his tight, thin-lipped smile twitch, threatening to crack out into a real grin. "If I jumped on you, you'd bounce like a pogo stick."

Sir Pentious

HEE HEE HEE!!! He appreciates that Alastor is going along with it--although Pentious is a bit slow on cues, he just assumes Alastor really IS that flustered! And look at how he wiggles, lowering his body until his hands are flat on the ground. SILLY MODE.

"ARE YOU *GOING* TO JUMP ON ME, SSSSSTICKBUG? YOU WOULDN'T DO ANY *REAL* DAMAGE! YOU WEIGH *NOTHING!*"

Alastor

He really is that flustered. He just knows his entertainer duties come first.

"Well, not if you're down there! Jump on a pogo stick when it isn't upright and you're just going to break it in half." He shakes his head, tutting. Sir Pentious don't you know anything about pogo sticks?

Sir Pentious

No, he can't use them. Therefore, he doesn't KNOW anything about them. But he does know something else-- how to STRIKE FAST. He SLITHERS FORWARD, going to try and swipe twinkle toes' legs out from UNDER HIM.

Alastor

Twinkle Toes twinkles his toes (hooves?) right over the swipe. You can't knock a dancer off his feet! ... and also Alastor saw it coming.

"Oh, is that all you've got?!" Alastor is *tap-dancing* out of range.

Sir Pentious

It was wrassle time. It had been FOREVER since their last wrassle!! Penny wiggles, his body scrunching like an accordion, before he LAUNCHES out, swiping at him once more with those claws of his.

HYAAAA

Alastor

Alastor ONCE MORE dances out of the way!!

Except that he doesn’t. He avoids the full mass of a giant reptilian accordion colliding with him, but a hand gets one leg and knocks him off balance. He crashes to the ground with a sound of cymbals and bicycle horns (???) and a flurry of fluttering costume fringe.

Sir Pentious

WHAT A CACOPHONY! Sir Pentious lets out QUITE the WAAAAAAHAAAAAA HAAAAAAA A at having knocked him over, enjoying seeing that FRINGE FLY.

And then he's gonna sit on him. Victory.

Alastor

Defeated. The mighty Radio Demon brought low. On Mardi Gras of all days.

He contemplates trying to roll them over, considers his odds, and decides he’ll have better chances at being irritating. He starts poking Sir Pentious’s tail. “Do I make a comfortable chair?”

Sir Pentious

Penny's head swivels, and he peers down at Alastor like that one Duck image.

"NOT REALLY, YOU'RE *RATHER* BONEY, AS IT *WERE*."

Alastor

“Well, what kind of a fool sits on a chair that isn’t even comfortable?” He switches from poking to smacking, he’s drumming on Sir Pentious’s hip with his hands. Plappa-plappa-pap

Sir Pentious

........ HE LOOKS SCANDALIZED,

"ARE YOU SLAPPING ME????????" It BARELY counts as slapping, Penny is just DRAMATIC. He looks down at Alastor like a CAT upset by butt smacks.

Alastor

He freezes mid-plap. “I was using you as a percussion instrument.” He gives Sir Pentious a winning smile!

Sir Pentious

HMM...........HE BEGINS TO SLITHER OFF OF ALASTOR.......... *Scales scales scales scales.*

"WELL ALASSSTOR, WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT TO DO? I IMAGINE YOU MUSST BE HEADING OFF TO MORE PARTYING, WITH YOUR GET UP!"

Alastor

HA! His plan WORKED. He sits up and slings an arm around Sir Pentious’s shoulders before he gets too far off the ground. “Just finished, actually! Maybe I’ll find some quiet balcony to watch a night parade, but the courir is *exhausting!* I’m all partied out.” He gives Sir Pentious a sweet look. “I wouldn’t mind spending a comparatively lowkey evening with a treasured friend.” He’s batting his lashes, check it out. What a darling deer.

Sir Pentious

Look at that BATTING of the LASHES.

Sir Pentious SNICKERS, then flutters his fingers, "OH? REALLY? HMM HMM~ ARE YOU *SUUURE* YOU WOULDN'T RATHER SSSPEND IT SSSNOGGING WITH TELLY?" He's so glad he added that last part in, otherwise it would have been AWKWARD!

Alastor

“Listen. Sir Pentious. My pal. My chum.” Alastor squeezes Sir Pentious’s shoulder with his hand, and for a split second, there’s a look of absolute terror in his eyes. “Right now, *there is nothing that I want less.*” Maybe the next time Alastor’s around him, he’ll find himself warmed all over by the welcoming light of romance. But from this distance, that light looks like the lure of an anglerfish.

And then Alastor’s totally normal. “So! Wanna see a parade or stay in?”

Sir Pentious

Oh that was a little bit harrowing. Sir Pentious can almost feel the way the warmth sucks out of the room--but then it's back! And a balmy temperature indeed, for this giant snake man.

He clears his throat, "HMMM... WELL, I'M NOT *DRINKING* MUCH NOW, SSSO SSTAYING IN MAY BE A TAD *BORING*. A PARADE SSSOUNDSSS FUN!"

Alastor

“Oh, I’m sure we can have *plenty* of fun without drinks—but that said, I prefer the parade myself! We’ll get a couple of colorful drinks with next to no alcoholic content, pretend they don’t taste disgusting, and find a high vantage point!” He stands, pulls out what looks like a map, and unfolds it. It’s a big schedule and map of parade times/routes, public balls, and other events. Tourism board doesn’t fuck around with Mardi Gras. “There’s still a couple of big ones that haven’t gone, but we’ll have to hustle! Shall we?”

Sir Pentious

That actually sounds like a LOT of fun. He makes a big smiley face, and offers his arm to Alastor.

"YESSS, WE SHALL!! I HAVEN'T BEEN TO A PARADE IN *DECADESSS.*"

Alastor

"Haven't you?! Why, then you're in for a treat! They're getting bigger and better every year! We'll have to get a *prime* seat for you—but not too high! What's the fun of being too high to catch throws...!"

He hooks his arm in Sir Pentious's, and off they go!

#hissandvinegar #chat log

[jungle321jungle]

Ten of Swords- Level Five: Good and Bad Ideas

The world of Swords of Power and Conquest was one Virgil dove head first into, giving his soul and life to the game. He would play whenever he could, and had even decided he wanted to go into game design. At times he had even dreamt of how wonderful it would be to be inside that world for even a moment- until that world became his reality.

The familiar world he had come to love was now a foreign prison, one with no way out.

Taglist: @angels-and-dreams @ollyollyoxinfree @gattonero17 @chumo-cookie @dreaming-always @anxiety-ismy-name @mrbubbajones @janustheliar @why-do-you-care

Ao3 - Masterlist

Level Five: Good and Bad Ideas

To be quite fair a duel was probably the dumbest idea he could have possibly ever had. If they were just talking swords themselves Logan had the upper hand. Sabers were fast and quick, the complete opposite of Virgil’s dadao. Sure he had practiced with it and he certainly was fast enough to fight a monster, but against a skilled player like Logan, he wasn’t so sure. Then there was Logan’s ability to read him on top of all of that- and he was a higher level too. So really the only thing Virgil had on his side were his skills. His skills... his skills which he was still perfecting... this was truly really a horrific idea wasn’t it? Why had Dee let him do this?

Virgil’s gaze glanced over to Dee who was meanwhile still convincing Patton this was a good idea.

“Backing out?” Logan hummed.

Virgil shook his head, “Just wondering if they’re too close.”

“I see. And your assessment?”

Virgil resisted the urge to call the older man an ass in reply.  “They’re fine. Traditional rules?”

“Traditional rules are fine. I wonder if the game still has the duel feature or if we’ll need to time it ourselves.” As Logan paused to scroll through his menu Virgil was still trying to determine how the hell he could beat Logan.

He was also failing at determining how to beat Logan.

Virgil gave a mental scream of frustration. He had proposed this idea to get Logan to loosen up and work with the rest of them, and maybe better understand skills- but he wasn’t sure he could draw the match out that long.

“Ah! It is here.”

Fuck.

Virgil forced himself to take a deep breath as he got into a ready stance and drew his weapon. He could do this. Being evasive was his specialty. He knew how to avoid mobs of players to steal from under their noses, so he could avoid Logan long enough for the other player to be pissed off. Somehow he would manage to be okay. He had escaped the tyren pack on the way to the Tavern with nothing (with Dee’s help) he could definitely do this! Well... maybe. Probably. Most likely...  hopefully.

The moment the duel began Logan was rushing him. Virgil held in a screech as he dodged and god did he hate that smug look on Logan’s face. Dodging would do him no good. He jumped back to put some distance between them but as Logan lunged in he quickly stepped and turned. Logan didn’t hesitate to pivot and strike again but this time Virgil had turned his large blade on the side to act as a shield as he moved. It was a risky thing, holding a two handed sword with one in this manner- but the only advantage Virgil could possibly have over Logan was his strength stat. Given his naturally heavier weapon he needed to put his points into strength, while Logan had focused elsewhere. He backed up again holding the sword in one pained hand while touching the flat part with the palm of his other. And this time when Logan pressed in, Virgil shoved back with all his might. It wasn’t much- not at all. But it was enough to catch Logan off guard causing him to stumble and give Virgil an opening.

His arm was straining from the weight but even so Virgil swung towards Logan’s unguarded torso. For a second Virgil thought he could land a strike. For a moment he thought he could at least land a single strike on his perfect opponent. Just for an instant.

Just as Virgil’s blade should have been smashing into Logan’s ribs- a forceful parry sent shockwaves down his arm causing the weapon to slip from Virgil’s fingers. He didn’t even have time to draw his back up knife before Logan’s sword tip was at his throat. “I understand now,” he said simply. “it is very much like muscle memory.”

“I told you!” Remus shouted from the side.

Virgil bit back a retort. “Congrats.”

“Your strength stat must be quite high,” Logan commented sheathing his blade. “But it could be higher, as could your stamina.”

“I’ll win next time.”

Logan's face didn’t change. “No you won’t.”

~~~~

“Hello sir, would you like to browse my shop?”

Roman gave Virgil a glare. “You know I hate you right? You know well I just left to get something.”

Virgil blinked. “Hello sir, would you like to browse my shop?”

“Yes!” Roman shouted in annoyance.

Virgil wasn’t fazed as he unlocked the door to allow Roman inside the meeting room but he stayed out. While he did truly want to know what was going on with the intel Dee had gotten, more people had found their way to the Tavern in his absence and they needed to be sold weapons.

“Anthony!” Someone called. “I’d like to shop!”

“I'm very sorry, but the Owner has closed my shop for a private meeting.” He gestured to his right. “But I have some of my new items right here. Would you like to browse?”

“Hell yes.”

Virgil was quite frankly thankful when he was allowed to stop playing NPC for the night. The moment he was through the shop door he sunk into the nearest open chair. “Why is this more exhausting in person?”

“Because when it was on the computer you could multitask,” Dee answered easily.

Virgil gave a sigh, “Where’d you send the others to?”

“Patton’s asleep upstairs, Logan is checking on a loose thread to our lead, and the twins are coordinating with some other players to see if it’s even possible to move forward with construction.”

“For what? I wasn’t here during your little meeting, remember?”

“I want to go all in on a new business venture,” Dee started. “We take this from a tavern, to an inn. But to do so we need more space. We could pay other players for construction, and then when it’s up and running we can charge less than the game inns. And we can also encourage trade.”

Virgil gave a frown, “How long have you been thinking about this?”

Dee gave a chuckle, “A few days. But I had been thinking before that if we are going to do raids for the swords we will need a whole lot of money to fund that and we aren’t a guild with that sort of reserve. So I came up with this idea. I figure we get started with our lead and we have people building while we are gone. I’m sure the players who have been sleeping on the floor will help in return for a bed too.”

“You are always doing so many things at once.”

“I guess,” he shrugged. “If this works out we can expand your shop too. I can hire people to work in your place while we travel. But...”

“But?”

“I guess I should ask if you’re okay with all of this. We built this together after all.”

Virgil rolled his eyes. “Of course I’m fine with it. Why wouldn’t I be? Your crazy scheme to build this place worked so why would I protest expansion? I mean you’ll get a ton more secrets to sell this way.”

“By the way... why did you agree to this in the beginning? This could have very well been a horrible mistake.”

Virgil gave a shrug, “Well initially we had just been looking for a place to build a house for us instead of paying for an inn so I didn’t care. But then when you came to me with this scheme I thought it was crazy. But I also thought if there’s any chance in it working, that you’d be the one who could do it. So, I just trusted you.”

“That’s insane.”

“I guess. But it’s not like we spent a ton of real world money on this so I didn’t mind. Finishing the quests to get the materials we needed was fun all in all.” Virgil gave a slight smile. “And I still remember how you used to scream at the NPC who built things because it didn’t customize right. You kept going on and on like it could understand you.”

“I wanted things to be perfect,” Dee grumbled.

“I know, I know. But you know to this day you still haven’t told me how you managed to get your hands on a guilds teleport point for this place.”

“I’m still sworn to secrecy on that.”

Virgil gave a chuckle, “Sure whatever.”

They lapsed into a comfortable silence just listening to muffled the sound of talking from the main floor.

“Did it really hurt that badly?” Dee asked him suddenly.

Virgil raised an eyebrow, “Hm?”

Dee gave a sigh as he hung his head to look at the table. “Dying I am mean... I know it’s been a while since, but- but I never knew how to ask.”

Virgil hadn’t realized he had been smiling until it slipped from his face at the question. He looked back to Dee’s concerned gaze and gave his friend a slight smile. “Yeah... it did, and then some.”

“Are- are you okay? You... you did die.”

Virgil took a deep breath and looked at the ceiling above him. “I... yeah. Yeah I am.”

Without looking Virgil could tell Dee didn’t believe him, but it was true. Dying had been the worst thing he had ever experienced and yet... somehow he was okay. He wasn’t great or even good, the pain has shaken him to his core. He wasn’t bad either, he didn’t have nightmares or think much of it strangely. So yeah in this moment at least, he was okay.

Logan didn’t come back till early morning, but apparently his news was important enough that Virgil found himself being woken up. He sat up blearily and rubbed at his eyes as Logan spoke before he shook Dee beside him.

“We now know for certain which group has the Sword of Stone,” Logan started when they were all sitting on the bedroom floor.

“Who?” Patton yawned.

“Shadow Dawn.”

“Fuck no,” Roman said loudly.

“Roman,” Patton chided. But the other player didn’t seem to have heard.

“Let’s start elsewhere. I don’t want to deal with them at all.”

“We don’t have any other leads,” Logan frowned.

“Ignore him,” Remus said, rolling his eyes. “They’re one of the many he fucked over.”

“I did not!” Roman yelled back. “They screwed me over!”

“Didn’t you try to steal a commander’s armor after claiming his play style wasn’t fit for it?” Virgil asked in confusion. “And then when he did change it they lost a war because he longer had the underlying skills for it?”

“I-I mean yeah! But- but they left me stranded in a mine!” Roman yelled back.

“After you did all of that to them.”

“W-what do you even know!?”

Virgil gave a slight shrug, “Well I’m a fan of yours... and I used to have a friend in the guild.”

“I’m not doing this,” Roman declared.

“No one is asking you to,” Dee replied. “You don’t have to do anything other than be a good diversion.”

Logan nodded in agreement. “Agreed. I suggest we start with diplomacy and send the twins to speak with them. If it doesn’t work we move to the second part. Virgil, Patton, and I can offer services to them.”

“You three should go ahead of Roman and Remus. Might seem too suspicious otherwise.”

“True.”

“Wait Virgil can’t go,” Roman put in. “Won’t he be recognized? Anthony is pretty easy to remember no? Won't people make the connection to the NPC?”

“I use a different avatar skin as an NPC and I hide my level and player icon with a few glitches I’ve fostered,” Virgil assured him. “So people usually just assume I’m boring because of it and leave me be.”

“...You make that sound like a good thing.”

“And if anyone figures it out I can usually just offer them a good deal to pretend they don’t. It’s easy really.”

“Why was this so time sensitive again?” Remus yawned.

Dee gave a frown, “Isn't it obvious? We aren’t the only ones after the swords.”

“Who else is?” Patton asked worriedly.

“Not sure just yet. But other people have been poking around and soon enough they’ll make the same connections we are. We need to get the Sword of Stone first.”

“But then is it really a good idea to ask Roman and Remus to talk to them? Isn't a surprise better?”

“But if they say yes and join us Patts then we got a whole ass guild on our side,” Remus answered, laying down. “We might only need to sacrifice Roman.”

Roman opened his mouth to most likely shout at his brother, but Remus had already fallen back to sleep. He gave an eye roll. “This is still a bad idea. SD will shoot me on sight.”

Logan didn’t bat an eye, “You have enough gold for revival.”

Roman gave a groan and collapsed onto the floor. “This is gonna suck.”

~~~~

Level Four - Level Five - Level Six

#videogame au #the bois get swords i dont make the rules #anxceit #patton sanders #virgil sanders #Janus Sanders #remus sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders

[slashingdisneypasta]

NATM 2 Rogues (Sans Kah) x Teddy Roosevelt (Super Platonically) || Oneshot

Title: I Was Made In A Mannequin Factory In Poughkeepsie

Notes: 

This may become a series. For now though, enjoy the meeting of Teddy! 

Plot: Even though Larry has agreed to travel with the tablet between the three museums, seeing as it wouldn’t be fair to out of the blue bring all these things and people (back) to life and then dump them back into non-existence, it was deemed necessary to move Kahmunhrah’s ‘business partners’ to the Natural History Museum so they’re far away from Kahmunrah’s gate and cant even ponder bringing him back- because that is undesirable outcome, for everyone.

After they arrive at the museum, most of the other exhibits (Sans the good old Easter Island Head and Dexter) keep their distance from them. Everyone’s uncomfortable about this move and change, and that’s understandable but it doesn’t feel good at all… until Teddy steps in.  

Warnings: I guess, exclusion? But don’t worry, Teddy will fix it

~~~

“Its is a… nice museum, I suppose.” Ivan, the first to talk when they leave their crates -Larry had yet to figure out a place to put them or construct exhibits for them,- the first night at their new home, 3 hours after the sun went down. They had been busy wondering around the halls, exploring the new playing field together… thinking. Now they stand together, alone, back with their crates in a hallway.

No one had come to greet them unless you count the Easter Island Head asking for ‘gum gum’- but they had looked at them, for sure. Some scowls, some glares, but most they were wary looks as people walked away. Its not that the three men expected a warm greeting, but they didn’t really expect news about them to spread so fast, either.

Napoleon takes a deep breath, breaking out of his thoughtful trance and glances up at Ivan. It was be impolite to leave him without a response when he’s attempted -however blandly, - to fix the mood… Looking around the place quickly, Napoleon notes the tall ceiling and the railings. “Uh, oui, it has some beautiful architecture, Ivan… “

“I like the colour of the wood.” Ivan adds, continuing the conversation because what else is there to do?? If this aloneness is any indication of how they’ll be living for the rest of their time here, then theirs no point in sitting and being solemn about it. Al, on the other hand makes a face at the Tzar from his place sitting on his crate beside Napoleon. Napoleon nods in agreement, looking around at the floors with risen eyebrows.

“I agree, it’s very, uh, museum-y.”

“Da.”

Theirs a lapse of awkward silence in the conversation, before Napoleon promptly turns to Al. “What do you think of the wood- “

“Oh nah, nah, nah, don’t look at me. I’m not playing this game with you people.” He takes his hands off the crate on either side of him for the first time since he sat down and rubs the lines left there from how tight he was gripping. “We’re all thinkin’ the same thing. You saw what I saw, how they’re lookin’ at us. They know about Kahmunrah and us. We ain’t safe here.”

Ivan’s eyebrows raise up his forehead. “Are not safe??” That’s a little bit of an overreaction, isn’t it? He was thinking maybe they were looking at a long, lonely life with just each other but… peril? What? That was not on the radar!

“Oui, I agree with him. Ivan, haven’t you heard of Caesar?” Napoleon looks forward again, face growing darker. “A great leader… like us… stabbed thirty-seven times in the middle of a crowded room. These rooms feel like that when we’re in them.”

“I’m sure you are overreacting. These are all but peasant, who- “Ivan immediately squints, on realising what he said. He looks for an even amount of time between Al and Napoleon, suspicious. “Wait.”

“If I was gonna kill you, man, I’d do it my Tommy.” Al raises his gun, rolling his eyes at Ivan. “Which doesn’t work, as we all know.” Ivan and Napoleon nod slowly at that, remembering Al’s idiocy that the man himself choose not to mention. He puts the useless gun back down in his lap. “Besides, probably couldn’t get a knife through all those layers on you, anyway.”

Ivan spares another suspicious look at the back of Al’s head. Then they watch some faceless soldiers pass by them in the hallway, ignoring them completely.

“So, what are we going to do about this??” Napoleon asks, a high and impatient tone in his voice and he whips around the face Al. “I don’t know about you two, but I’ve already died once and I do not look forward to giving that red, horned beast another chance at me.” When he was alive, Napoleon would have never mentioned the Devil outright like that. He never would have suggested he was going to that place, in the first place.

… but now he knows how he’s remembered. He knows what parts of his life he’s judged on. The blood, the fear, and the death. He doesn’t see why deaths judgement will be any different.

Ivan takes a deep breath in, hearing Napoleons words like a stab through the gut, and looks furiously at him, but stays quiet. He’s right…

“Me neither. Boys, we need a plan.”

Ivan immediately rejects one part of Al’s phrase. “I am not one of your monochromatic minions, Alphonse, refrain from calling me your ‘boy’.”

And Napoleon, another. “For what?! Its not like we can charter a carriage and travel back to Washington in our condition!”

Al takes in a deep, refrained breath of his own this time, and slowly turns threatening around to speak quietly to Napoleon, first. “Mate, no one charters carriages anymore anyway. They’re called cars, now. And of course, I wasn’t suggesting that- don’t assume I’m an idiot!”

“I beg to differ! I think it would be much safer for us all if we all assumed that!”

“I’ll get right back to you, Froggy. And Ivan! I don’t take kindly to being told what not to d- “

“Ah! There you are!”

The new voice startles the 3 out of their budding argument, and the all turn down the hall towards where the Easter Island head is planted- to see an older man with a brown moustache, a jolly smile on his face and his hand on the handle of a sword coming towards them. Ivan raises an eyebrow, confused about who this could possibly be and why he is coming towards them so familiarly, Napoleon whips out his own sword and jumps to his feet, and Al just watches the 26th President of his country speed walk towards him, dumbfounded. None of them are yet used to historical figures they know, being alive also.

As soon as Teddy stops in front of them, he calmly raises his hands in surrender. “No, no. Sorry, sir.  I just hold the handle of my weapon, so it stays still while I walk. I should’ve known better- my apologies.”

Napoleon holds Teddy’s stare for a moment… Ivan and Al watch the tension a little worried and a little amused… and then the general puts his sword back away on his hip. Something about the way this man calls him ‘sir’, acknowledging their military positions and the kind sparkle in his eyes… Napoleon tries to calm down again, as Teddy smiles to them all in turn, under that moustache of his.

“Good evening, men! I apologise that I’m late. I meant to greet you as soon as we awoke for the night, but I’m afraid there was an unfortunate run in between our night guard and a monkey. Just routine stuff, don’t worry! Its settled now.” He offers his gloved hand to Napoleon, the closes to him, first. “Theodore Roosevelt, 26th US President. Don’t be afraid to call me Teddy, though. I’m not president anymore.”

The way he says it makes them all think he’s joking about not being a leader anymore. Like it doesn’t actually bother him, and none of them understand it.

But they move on, anyway. It’s something to discuss later, anyway.

They all shake their hands and introduce themselves, and Teddy nods his head. Once introductions are over, his hands both touch the sides of his thighs in, nearly a ‘A-Ten-HUT!’ kind of stance, spine completely straight. Ivan and Napoleon appreciate the good form. “So, I trust you’re settling in here well? Everyone is being welcoming??”

Al takes his hands, puts them on Ivan and Napoleons arms and prods them out of the way so he can go toe-to-toe with ‘Teddy’. They just give him dirty looks and shuffle to give him room, Ivan rolling his eyes at Al’s temperament. Such a child. “Actually bub, they been givin’ us dirty looks all night. We feel like them slaves, in Rome, ‘bout to be thrown into the auditorium with the lions!”

Napoleon sighs deeply. Coliseum… not, auditorium…

But Teddy doesn’t disregard Al’s statement because of a small mistake, like any superior Napoleon new, would have. His face fills with concern and frustration. “Well, I’m very sorry you feel that way. I told them to… we had a meeting… “Teddy’s face looks positively stormy, for a few moments there, a stark difference from his earlier cheer. Al feels pride well in him, getting such a serious reaction. He thinks, maybe this guy, who’s clearly the leader of this motley bunch, will get some executions going now! That’ll be great! This place is about to get a real glow-up! -

… That is, until Al truly recognises the expression on the older mans face.

Its not murderous. He doesn’t even think he describe it as ‘pissed’.

More like… disappointed. Like a mother about her children.

Al sets himself back onto the heels of his feet as he had popped onto his tippy toes. Good god, what kind of Brady Bunch shit has he walked into?

Finally, Teddy sighs, kisses his lips and comes to a conclusion. “Well, we’ll fix that. Come along, men! We’ll introduce you to the group!” He starts walking off back down the hall the way he came, calling loudly to the Easter Island head that honestly creeps Ivan out a bit, to please call a meeting.

Napoleon, Ivan and Al look at each other for a moment.

… Follow? Or stay behind?

Or, more specifically, go force themselves out of their comfort zone and make acquaintanceships, or cage themselves in to a lonely rest of their time here and possible assassination?

Ivan turns, squares his shoulders and follows the ex-president first, followed by Napoleon with his nose in the air, and finally an uncertain Al. “Fine, but I aint trust none of ‘em.”

#Night At The Museum Fanfiction #Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian #Al Capone #Ivan The Terrible #Napoleon Boneparte #natm al capone #natm ivan the terrible #napoleon natm #Teddy Roosevelt natm #Larry Daley

[itsybitsylemonsqueezy]

kazumaji 15? ty

Of course! Thanks for all the likes, btw 💕It is appreciated!

15. things you said with too many miles between us

“Another designer seeks to commission us to build an... aquarium? I’m not sure we’re certified for that...” Nishida muttered, checking his paperwork on his clipboard. 

“Boring, reject it,” Majima commanded idly, lolling back in his office chair. 

“An aquarium is boring now?” Nishida blinked up at him. 

“Boringggg,” Majima whined, spinning around slowly, “Tedious, pain in the ass, move onnnn...” 

“Er, I think that’s all the pitches and Daigo-san requests your presence for a meeting on Friday,” Nishida announced, lowering his clipboard. 

Majima snorted. “Yeah, alright,” he sighed, not for the last time regretting his promise to Kiryu, “Tell him I’ll come.” 

“Then that’s all of the matters of business for today, sir,” Nishida explained with a shrug. 

Majima frowned. “Really? That’s all of it?” 

“Well, you’ve rejected the last 62 construction contracts so...”

“We’re busy!” Majima crossed his arms. “Ya want me ta put my men at risk working them to the bone?”

“We’re below capacity at present, sir. If you took on just one of these smaller projects, like the foundation repair in the post office...” Nishida began flipping through his notes. 

“Gah, who has time for that?! There’s too much to do!” Majima insisted, spreading his arms over his completely empty desk. 

“...yes, sir,” Nishida replied and Majima could hear the restrained eyeroll from his subordinate, “But, respectfully, sir, you do seem to be spinning your wheels a bit.”

“If Kiryu hadn’t up and taken all the best parts of the city with him, I wouldn’t have this problem,” Majima muttered, staring at a table leg. 

“Why don’t you head out anyway? See what fun you can scare up on your own?” Nishida smiled encouragingly. 

Majima glanced up at him and offered him a small grin. “Guess I could do that... good work, Nishida, you can shut down for the night,” he said, standing.

 “And will you at least think about the smaller projects? I’ve kept a dozen earmarked that we could do at short notice,” Nishida called after him as he headed for the door. 

“Yeah, yeah, quit naggin, I’ll think about it.” Majima waved him off, headed out into the last gasp of sunlight without a backwards glance. He knew Nishida was right; they could easily be doing more and it would give the men a morale boost to complete a project. He just didn’t want him to be right. He was too busy trying not to wallow in self-pity and failing. 

The truth was he wanted to be a petulant child for once and rail against this shitty babysitting project Kiryu had saddled him with. But he had this unforgivable honorable streak in him that kept making him get up and obey his word, even when there was absolutely nothing in it for him. Except Kiryu’s smile. But now even that was too far away. 

Majima reached for his cigarettes and lit only quickly. The warm smoke in the just cooling air did him good, buoyed him with the memory of past warmths and intimacies. Kiryu had asked him, after all, and he was a goddamn sucker for Kiryu asking him shit. 

“You’re a goddamn fool, Majima,” he muttered to himself, walking past Millennium Tower and into the busy nightlife. A little too busy for his current mood, really. He ducked into the dark side alleys, walking, and thinking, and occasionally smoking, until he ended up by that bar Kiryu liked so much. He puffed hard on his cigarette then, remembering the night Kiryu wouldn’t fight him, the night before it all went wrong. Fuck, those ten years had been hard and this was beginning to feel a lot like that. He tried to shove that thought away; it was selfish and it wasn’t fair and it would just throw him deeper into des- 

His pocket was vibrating. 

Majima frowned and plucked his phone from his back pocket. His face lit up as he saw the name. 

 “KIIIIRYU-CHAN!” he squealed into the receiver without a care to give for Kiryu’s eardrums, “I was just thinking of ya!”

Kiryu’s little chuckle did things to his heart he didn’t think his heart could do any more. “It’s good to hear you too, Majima.”

“Oh, ya sweet thing,” Majima purred, batting his eyes and wishing Kiryu could see him do it and smile that bemused smile he had, “Got me all buttered up now, what’d’ya call for?” 

“Uh, actually, I just wanted to talk.” Kiryu sounded sheepish. 

Majima’s eye widened. “Oh? Ya saying ya missed me, Kiryu-chan?” He hadn’t smiled this hard in ages and his body thrummed with the excitement.

Kiryu fidgeted, nervous noise coming from his throat. “Well... yeah,” he ultimately mumbled. 

Majima’s smile strained his face and he swore Kiryu could probably hear it. “Awww, Kiryu-chan!” he flopped against the brick wall with an over-exaggerated sigh, “Ya brighten my days with that. I’ve missed your dour looks too.” 

“I don’t look dour, do I?” Kiryu pouted. 

“Ya grumpier than a cat in a rainstorm, Kiryu-chan!” Majima giggled, “But don’t take it too hard, I’ve got a soft spot for grumpy ones.” 

“Uh, thanks? I guess.” Kiryu huffed a laugh. 

“Mmmm, it is good to hear your voice again,” Majima sighed, melting a little at every word, “Whatcha up to on that boring island of yours?”

“Not much, just sent the kids to bed. I’ve just been looking out at the ocean. It’s quiet here,” Kiryu sighed. 

Majima cocked his head. “Ya don’t sound totally thrilled with that, Kiryu-chan.” 

“No, it’s great here, it’s peaceful and relaxing, it’s just... mmm, well...” 

Majima nodded. “Go on,” he encouraged. 

Kiryu sighed. “Sometimes it’s just a little too quiet. I mean, for me, grew up in the city and all so I’m used to it and... I dunno, all the city noises still feel like home. Is that weird?”

Majima shook his head. “No, no, not at all. Growing pains is normal, you’ll adjust.” And he hated himself for not really wanting him to. 

“Yeah, probably.” Kiryu paused, maybe sitting down or stretching, Majima guessed. “So what’re you doing?” 

“Oh, the usual, thrashing punks and taking names,” Majima smacked his fist against his thigh so Kiryu could hear it, “was just taking an evening stroll and thinking of you.” 

“You’re sweet, Majima,” Kiryu murmured. 

Majima flushed. Shit, fuck, shit shit. “Err, well, I was just by your sweetie’s bar and ya happened to spring to mind, is all, nothin-”

“I think about you a lot too,” Kiryu continued, “even here.”

Majima swallowed hard, mouth dry. “Y-Yeah?”

There was a muffled sound and Majima assumed Kiryu was nodding into a pillow or something. “Yeah... so I called ‘cause I just wanted to hear your voice.” Kiryu’s sigh had a dreamy quality to it like he was really longing after something. Majima felt like he had to sit down.  

“Ya can call me any time, Kiryu,” he mumbled, “rain or shine, day or night, I’ll always pick up for ya.” 

“That’s good to hear, Majima,” Kiryu murmured, starting to sound sleepy, “thanks.” 

“Mmm, no problem,” he muttered back, “Can I... will ya call again? Soon?” He hated how pathetic he sounded, how his poor little heart squeezed tighter in anticipation. 

“Mmm, I’m out all day tomorrow, but what about after that? I can call you then.” 

Majima choked down the hum of happiness that threatened to bubble up. “Yeah, yeah that’s perfect,” he sighed. 

“Good. Mmm... I have to say good night now Majima,” Kiryu said with a yawn, “It’s early mornings over here.” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Majima nodded vaguely, still in a daze, “got all them kiddies to get up and get dressed.”

Kiryu chuckled and the sounds pierced Majima to his core. “Wish you could meet the kids, you’d like them.” Majima bit his lip so hard it bled. “Well, good night, Majima.”

“Good night, Kiryu-chan, sleep well.” 

Kiryu hummed at him and the line went dead. 

Majima slid to the ground, a limp puddle of feelings. Fuck. Shit. As soon as he could walk, he was buying the first fucking plane ticker to Okinawa and telling that bastard off for ever leaving him. And also would he please consider going on a date maybe? 

Eventually Majima got to his feet and dusted himself off and he’d almost made it out of the alley way before... wait, shit, had Kiryu been in bed that whole time?!

#Kazumaji #Kiryu Kazuma #Majima Goro #finally some actual fluff #enjoy! #cloudyksims

[bagelbright-tok]

The Grimm

This is my original fan series. I am new to Tumblr, so I am unsure of how this really works. I understand some of it I guess, but it is just a monkey see, monkey do sorta thing. Sorry for grammar mistakes! The image is my original image that I created. Please do not steal or use it for your own purposes.

You, the reader, are one of many Grimm Reapers. Today, you were assigned to follow a bizarre group of folk.

___________________

“Shinigami. You're going to be assigned to Joseph Joestar, Jotaro Kujo, Muhammad Avdol, and Holly Joestar Kujo.”

Your boss stated, handing you a sickle. Lives were to be harvested. “You are to follow them and any others that join their group. If you need help keeping track, you know to call for it. Remember to keep count of how many you harvest.”

You've been through this a million times. Lives were definitely going to be lost, whether it be the people in the group, or other people being killed by the group. For you, it was all the same. People killing people. It was a misconception that the reapers killed you. All they were to do was harvest the soul and properly place it where it belonged. Heaven, Hell, nothingness, purgatory. They helped the soul pass on, that is, if the soul did want to pass on. 

“Yes sir.” You say, taking the sickle and quickly transporting yourself to where the group currently was. 

A cafe. You cared not what they were talking about. You walk around the table, taking down the numbers. There was Muhammad, Joseph, Jotaro, and Holly. All accounted for. Whoever was to join was to also be followed. If it wasn't obvious by now, you are unseen. Something that can not be perceived by the mere human eye. Only in death or near death can a human see you. You sit down in an empty chair at the table and begin to listen in. Perhaps this assignment would be more entertaining than the last few hundred you had worked on.

“Your great great grandfather, my grandfather, Jonathan Joestar was killed on a ship in a horrible fire. His body was stolen by none other than that vampire, Dio Brando!” Joseph explained. “Vampire?”

Vampires were a frequent occurrence. Certainly difficult to deal with, as most were stubborn to get thrown into purgatory. Some were powerful enough to perceive the reaper, and even kill them. You'd dealt with vampires your fair share of times, so it wasn't a big deal. You continued sitting and listening.

“What about these evil spirits? Or what you call Stands. How did you recognize I had one manifesting?” Jotaro asked.

“Well-” Joseph smirked, excited to share. “A little over a year ago, a Stand of my own manifested. Let me show you what it is!”

You watch as Joseph set a camera on the table and smash it. You noticed purple vines come from his hand and enter the camera as it was smashed. Much to your surprise, a photo printed out. You were unfamiliar with this power. A Stand ability. This assignment would be interesting. A Stand is supposedly the manifestation of one's life and soul energy. Could a Stand also perceive a Reaper? Were all of them take on a plant based form? 

You had questions that wouldn't be answered by the group you followed. You couldn't show yourself to them and casually tell them that you are a Grimm Reaper following them around because people were definitely going to die. You continued to follow them from the cafe, to the Kujo household. This case suddenly seemed like it was a bust. Joseph and Avdol were to stay only a few days with Holly. The next day, Jotaro was to go to school. 

What sort of events were going to take place?  “Guess I'll find out later.”

The day was gone, and night fell upon Japan. Your boss hadn't told you what to do when everyone was inactive. Usually it was something he'd mention before throwing you into an assignment. Just to be safe, you stayed on Earth. You roamed around the large construct that was the Kujo home. You messed around with the small critters that also roamed the area restlessly. As tempting as it may be, you don't stray too far from the Joestar group. You entered the corporeal realm. You could feel the moonlight illuminate you. It was cool and quiet. Breathing wasn't necessary for you, but you did it anyway. There was some tranquility to it. Inhale, exhale, repeat.

You stood just outside the walls of the gate to the Kujo home. You could remember when you first came into existence, just barely. Like a natural born follower. You came and maybe a day later, you were assigned a case, and you went along like you had been doing this since forever. First, reapers were stuck with the creatures of Earth. The moment there was life, there was death. You certainly weren't of the first reapers to come into existence. You were lucky to say you were among the first thousand. You were a part of the large group of reapers sent out to harvest the large number of dinosaurs that had suddenly died. It was a separate group that took the last of the dinosaurs. All that remained were the small, "evolved," dinosaurs and creatures. Birds, crocodiles, Alligators, foxes, small wolves, things that weren't named until humans came into existence. It was an abomination. The Reapers were almost sent out to kill the first humans, breaking the rules just to be rid of these monstrosities. It was until the human showed to be far more intelligent than first thought. Then their population grew, and their intelligence did as well. They were suddenly constructing things, inventing, and making. It was almost amazing.

As sudden as night had fallen, the day had risen. Back into the incorporeal realm of which no human could perceive. You watched Jotaro get ready for school. You watched Holly make breakfast. You watched Joseph complain about tea and Japanese instant coffee, which actually turned out to be American instant coffee. 

With what Joseph and Avdol were talking about, you had a rough idea of what was happening.

“The Joestar bloodline is being affected by DIO's Stand awakening.”

“Because of my grandfather's body, we are having Stand manifestations.”

Joseph and Avdol were hoping Holly wouldn't manifest a Stand. It was a seriously misplaced hope. You already knew this. If Joestar's are being affected, and Holly is a Joestar, then obviously she is going to be affected. You'd taken in enough information.

You transported yourself to Jotaro, who was still walking to school. You went to follow, and were surprised when a groupie of girls phased through you and followed Jotaro. 

“God. I hate it when that happens.” Phasing through people or things was always something that made you shiver.

You continued your pursuit on Jotaro. Instead of you normally behind the subject, you were forced to walk just to his side. It didn't necessarily matter, Jotaro couldn't see you. It was just a preference of yours to walk behind Instead of beside. You stopped when he stopped to yell at girls following him. You continued when he continued. You did not follow through when he fell down the stairs though. You glided down the stairs, only a metre behind the girls who ran down the stairs to check on Jotaro. You were going to see if he was already dead. That height of a fall could kill someone if they'd land on the cement. But Jotaro had used his Stand to redirect his fall into a bush, and only really hurt his ass.

Then Noriaki Kakyoin entered the picture. He handed Jotaro a handkerchief to use to clean his knee. Then Jotaro was back on his way to school. You know something is up with this Kakyoin kid. You continue your journey with Jotaro, instead of going back to Joseph and Avdol. Things really were getting interesting, weren’t they?

=========CHPT.1 END========= A/N: Sorry for posting so long after the first introduction. I felt extremely apprehensive when it came to posting the first chapter of this original fan series. I had to flip a coin to post or procrastinate. Sorry for any mistakes when it came to what actually happens in the manga or anime episodes. Thanks for reading (if you did.) Thanks for checking it out too. I will probably be posting the second chapter, no matter the traction this post gets. Again, sorry about mis-tagging.

#jjba #sdc #stardust crusaders #jojo's bizarre adventure #jojo part three #jojo part 3 #reader insert #insert reader #x reader #Grim reaper AU #The Grimm #chapter 1 #Original fan series

[inmytaste-blog]

Señorita

Word Count: 3.2k

Warnings: A very encouraging Shawn and a self-confidence under construction

A/N: Another fullfilled request which made it into my askbox just today! I didn’t want to delay it and fall behind since Shawn released his new song just yesterday. This was very pleasing to write and I really liked the way it turned out. I hope I made that anon’s request justice and I truly hope it lived up to their expectations! Once again, feedback is very much appreciated and I would like to hear your thoughts on this piece! Till next time, happy reading!

__________________________________________________________

‘’Are you serious? A new song along with a new music video? Shawny you are treating your fandom so well lately, I’m impressed’’ you said, placing your arms around his neck and giving him a slight peck on his cheek, pleased with the news.

‘’Aye, does my fandom include you as well?’’ he said lowering his much larger figure in order to capture your lips in a proper kiss.

‘’I don’t think I want to disappoint you now that you have a lot on your plate babe’’ you jokingly stated and freed yourself from his tight grip, heading towards the kitchen.

‘’I think this answer pained me more… Nevertheless, I know you are the craziest fan there is no matter what you say’’.

Hearing Shawn’s words, you realized that he was more than right. You were indeed his number one fan and you always fangirled hard when something new was on its way concerning his career. So when Shawn announced to you that he would be working on a new song, you were on cloud nine. Someone would say that you were more thrilled when Shawn had a new project to deliver than himself and they wouldn’t be exaggerating. You knew something was coming up due to endless phone conversations and meetings between Shawn and Andrew so when the bomb exploded you exploded too.

‘’Whatever you say Mendes’’ you slyly replied and plopped down on your couch.

‘’So tell me more about this song. What is the concept behind it? Will you be singing alone or will it be a duet? When will you start shooting and rehearsing? Why are you so secretive?’’

‘’First of all, you are bombarding me with questions love. How can I answer all at once? Secondly, I can’t reveal anything else yet. Telling you was risky as it is so you will get no more information for today. Sorry.’’ Shawn explained and your face fell.

You weren’t really urging him to tell you everything because you knew that this industry works with a little bit of secrecy as well but you couldn’t deny the fact that you were disappointed that you wouldn’t be getting any more insights and details concerning his newest work. At this point, you wished he hadn’t shared anything related to this new song whatsoever because now you wanted to know everything there was to know.

‘’Fair enough. Guess who’s not getting any love from me today’’ you half-jokingly said and moved further away from Shawn to the other end of the couch.

‘’C’mon Y/N don’t be such a baby. Everything will be announced to you when it is the right time for it to be’’ Shawn argued and proceeded to hug you.

You slightly pushed him off but eventually gave in to his touch because deep down, you knew he was right. It wasn’t his fault that he couldn’t go into more depth about his work and it surely wasn’t fair for you to know everything beforehand while all his other fans around the world were kept in the dark. Besides, what’s the fun in knowing everything and having no suspense in your life?

That was something Shawn really adored and appreciated on you. It always made him feel safe and relaxed and it surely helped him more when he was ready to perform, shoot or record a new piece. His job was already pressuring enough and sometimes it got to the point that he would even call it suffocating. Having someone who was genuinely understanding and encouraging was a true bargain for him since he really wanted to leave his work back in the studio and be met with relaxation and relief when he got home.

And you offered him just that. You knew what you were signing up for when you agreed to date Shawn so you promised more to yourself to be the best version of you just for his own sake. You were more interested in his well-being than anything else especially when you found out all the story concerning his battles with anxiety in the past. You truly believed he was a person that deserved all the best in the world and you were more than honoured when Shawn chose you to be his companion; his rock who would give him all the best.

There were of course times when you would cross the line and you would be pleading for him to share something more when he was preparing something new but you knew when to stop. Shawn knew as well that you were firstly a fan and secondly a girlfriend when it came to his music and he was really thankful to have someone so supportive and so caring. But when he declared that he was in no position to share anything else, it was your signal to accept it and stop questioning further.

‘’Okay okay. I understand. But tell me at least this; will you be singing on your own or with other people as well?’’ you asked, aiming your puppy eyes at him, a feature you knew very well he couldn’t resist.

‘’Ugh, you are playing dirty Y/N, giving me this look which gets me everytime’’

‘’Please?’’ you pressed a little more.

‘’Okay, it will be a duet but this is all I have for you. Now, what movie does my number one fan want to watch with her superstar?’’

Truth was Shawn wanted nothing more than to stop playing games and just confess to you everything he knew so far about his new music video and song. It physically ached him to withdraw information from you, especially when you were being nothing but patient and enthusiastic with his hectic lifestyle. The only thing which was keeping him behind was the fact that he had arranged to sing and shoot with you. You were nothing close to famous or artistic, besides the very well-organised blog you were maintaining dedicated to your talented boyfriend, but other than that you had no contracts or business with the music industry.

However, Shawn wasn’t on the same page with you on this matter. He had heard you singing when you had first started dating and he was mesmerized by your voice. It combined a sweetness and a raspier metal which had driven him insane. He still remembered that moment up to this day and he never hesitated to ask you to join him when he was singing in his studio, even if it was for fun. The most outstanding thing of all was a file in your computer which consisted of some covers you had attempted when you first discovered Shawn’s music. Shawn really wanted to listen to them but you only agreed when you were official and you trusted him completely.

When his ears were met with the sound of your melodic voice, he felt like someone had casted a spell on him. The words of In My Blood acquired a completely new, a more profound meaning when they left your lips and they were interlaced with your unique sounds. He couldn’t help himself but transfer all the covers you had saved in that file to his phone without any second thoughts.

From that time on, he always made sure to raise the levels of confidence you had about your singing skills which to be frank, were the lowest they could be. It really puzzled and it even saddened him to know that his girl was so talented but she couldn’t appreciate her skills more. So the least he could do was ask you to sing or at least hum something when he was falling asleep or to accompany you in your private shower concerts. He was a sucker for your singing and you still laughed about it when he would praise you. But this never stopped him from getting the most he could of your beautiful voice.

Now Shawn tried to take things up a notch. He hated to know that your talent was not getting the recognition and the appreciation it deserved so when Andrew came up to him with a new suggestion for a song and a music video, Shawn realised this was the opportunity he was seeking.

‘’So, I was thinking that after the success of If I Can’t Have You, the fire’s still at your feet and another release will really keep the fans at the edge of their seats. What do you say?’’

‘’Y-Yes yes. Are you serious? Now that my tour is on, I have inexhaustible energy. Tell me all about it’’. Shawn wanted nothing more than to keep his portfolio full and this new song was the perfect chance for him to introduce you to the world of professional singing.

‘’Okay. My first thoughts have to do with the artists you will be singing with. I’m really rooting for a duet but if you want to include more artists, it’s up to you mate. What are your thoughts so far?’’ Andrew proceeded with the details and Shawn was more than ready to spill your name.

‘’Okay. I don’t know if you will see eye to eye with me about this and I can already tell you will be taken aback but my suggestion is Y/N’’. There was no turning back now. The only thing he could do was pray that Andrew would agree for you to do a duet with Shawn.

‘’Y/N? As in your girlfriend Y/N? Shawn are you sure? I mean I have no evidence that she can sing. Plus we don’t have much time to call her in and arrange a sound check with her’’

‘’I don’t think that will be necessary’’ said Shawn and he was quick enough to pull his phone out and let the room be filled with your version of Lost In Japan.

‘’You are a smooth motherfucker. I am waiting both of you next time for the rehearsal’’.

Shawn hadn’t really filled you in on what was going on so when he told you that you would be going with him to the studio you were a bit bewildered.

‘’And why do I have to come as well? Can’t you see that I am all comfortable watching Friends?’’ you matter-of-factly stated and Shawn dragged you from the couch.

‘’It is a surprise. Now get your bum up and go get ready. We are leaving in five’’.

‘’Okay okay sir’. But you’re buying me ice cream later’’ you pointed your finger at him and he chuckled.

‘’I sure am’’.

Shawn felt a little bit guilty that he hadn’t been completely honest to you about his duet but he knew that if he had spilled the beans and asked about your consent, you would be negative. Heck, he didn’t even have a clue what your reaction was going to be now but he decided to take his chances and risk it. He really needed to get you out of your cocoon and show you what you were really capable of, something you always kept your eyes closed to.

‘’Hello Andrew. It’s been a while. How are you?’’ you inquired when you reached the correct floor and Andrew hugged both you and Shawn.

‘’Shawn’s been a pain in the ass but I manage. How are you feeling sweetheart? Are you ready for your first?’’

‘’Um excuse me? What first?’’ you turned your glance at Shawn who was picking at his nails and was looking nervously at Andrew.

‘’Shawn dude, didn’t you tell her anything?’’

‘’I wanted it to be a surprise! Don’t blame me!’’ Shawn put his hands up and looked at you.

‘’Anyone care to explain?’’ you hated being excluded from what was happening so you were growing more aggravated by the minute.

‘’Y/N, dear, Shawn has brought you here to work on his new song called Señorita. You will be his duet for this song and for the video of course’’ Andrew explained and your jaws were on the floor. Shawn very well knew you were in no place to share your singing with the whole world and he still went and got you into this.

‘’Shawn what is he saying? What did you do?’’ you turned your attention to him and he cupped your face.

‘’I know you are going to pull the ‘’I can’t be exposed to basically the whole planet and my singing is not even that good’’ card but please hear me out. When I first listened to your voice I was amazed. You remember my first reaction. I instantly felt like an apprentice in singing in front of you. During those two years we’ve been together, I am more than pleased to see that I am the reason for the growth of your confidence when it comes to singing. Y/n please consider singing with me. Your talent deserves to be exposed and applauded’’ Shawn concluded and your vision had gotten blurry because of his speech.

‘’But-but how does Andrew know that I can sing? How does he know that this isn’t gonna be a flop?’’

‘’Um I know believe me’’ Andrew chimed in and just on cue, Shawn wiggled his phone between his fingers.

‘’You shady bastard’’ you smacked Shawn’s arm and he playfully acted as if he was hurt.

‘’So, what do you say baby? Will you be my Señorita in this song?’’

You still felt a little bit out of place and your guts were telling you that you would surely mess this up but the look Shawn was giving you and the feeling that he would be right beside you the whole time, boosted your courage and your confidence. Not really trusting your words at this point, you gave Shawn a shy nod and you swore that his eyes were like small stars radiating their glow.

‘’Is that a yes? Y/N baby you will not regret this I promise you’’ Shawn hugged you and lifted you up in the air before giving you a reassuring smile.

‘’Thank God. I don’t think I would be able to get someone else if she turned this down’’ Andrew remarked and you both fell in a fit of laughter.

‘’Okay. Get your sheets with the lyrics, get in there and blow me away’’.

Getting into the recording space, you felt your palms getting damp and your head slightly dizzy. Shawn must have felt your uneasiness and he placed the microphones opposite of one another, so that the only thing in front of you was Shawn and no one else. This little gesture put your nerves at bay and with a final confirmation, Shawn signaled for Andrew to start recording.

Throughout the song, your eyes were focused on the piece of paper which contained the words that came out of your mouths. You didn’t dare take a glimpse of Andrew, fearing that if you saw his disappointment you would collapse and this whole procedure would be wasted. Surely, this was the last thing you wanted, the first one being to please Shawn and not to embarrass him. He trusted you enough to get Andrew to agree and have you here singing so you just couldn’t betray his trust.

Reaching the main chorus, your eyes travelled to Shawn who was giving his all during the song and it dawned on you that it was the first time in a while that you were seeing him recording a song. Only this time, you were a part of it too. Shawn’s eyes fell on yours and the smile he gave you was enough to let you know that you were doing a pretty decent job for a first time. You knew that the song was going to be a bop nonetheless and being with Shawn in the act, really made you understand why all of his songs always made it at the top of the charts.

‘’ I love it when you call me Señorita

I wish I could pretend I didn’t need ya

But every touch is ooh la la la

It’s true la la la

Ooh I should be running

Ooh you know I love it

When you call me Señorita

I wish it wasn’t so damn hard to leave ya

Ooh I should be running

Ooh you keep me coming for ya’’

Shawn really adored the way the song was turning out. When he had first scanned the lyrics, the only person he could picture himself singing it with was you. The thing that he felt most freaked out about was that you both had first started seeing each other as friends before this fling between you two had developed. So, at least for Shawn, this song was once again speaking to him on another level. He felt really connected with it and now that he was singing with you, it made him feel even more connected to you as well. It would be a thing that would always remind you of what you are capable of when you are together and how the one makes the other discover something fresh for themselves.

Andrew was dumbfounded when you both started singing together and he was positive this was going to be another success for Shawn. He felt really relieved that you had decided to give this a go since the music industry was a department that was always in need of fresh blood and upcoming artists who had a flash of talent. Besides, the chemistry you had with Shawn was authentic and rare so the need to construct something similar with someone else was totally unnecessary.

‘’All along I’ve been coming for ya

And I hope it meant something to ya

Call my name I’ll be coming for ya

Coming for ya, coming for ya, coming for ya

For ya

(Ooh she loves it when I come)

For ya

Ooh I should be running

Ooh you keep me coming

For ya"

The song came to an end and if it wasn’t for the air conditioning unit in the small room, you would be a sweating mess. The look you exchanged with Shawn while the last words of the song were being spoken, really showed you how much Shawn loved you and that he truly believed you deserved to be loved by other people for your immense talented soul.

‘’And it’s a wrap. Guys…’’ Andrew started and you closed your eyes, not really wanting to be confronted or let down by his next words.

‘’You were fucking bomb. This is gonna be the song of the century. Well done. And Shawn, thanks for persuading our little star here to work with us’’ he said giving you a high-five.

Hearing Andrew’s words lifted all the weight off of your shoulders and you felt ten times lighter. Never in your wildest dreams had you imagined working with Shawn in a professional and official manner but here you were, blowing both of the boys away with your singing.

‘’Wow. That was-‘’ you didn’t let Shawn finish his sentence and you connected his lips with your very own in a passionate kiss.

‘’Thank you. For this amazing experience and for believing in me when I just didn’t’’ you truthfully said to him and his arms tightened around your shorter frame.

‘’I thank you for bringing out the rest of the passion I have for this job. You see, singing with you makes me feel things. And now that it happened for a much larger audience, it made me the happiest man alive’’.

Just before you could say or do anything else Andrew’s voice echoed through the walls, making you both jump.

‘’Don’t rest on your laurels kiddos. We still have a music video to shoot!’’

#shawn mendes #shawn #mendes #mendes army #shawn mendes imagines #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes blurbs #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes x reader #imagines #angst #fluff #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes smut #smut #writing #shawn mendes au #shawn peter raul #shawn mendes angst imagines #shawn mendes angst #shawn mendes writing #sm #shawn mendes dirty imagine #shawn mendes dirty imagines #anon #answered #request #shawn mendes masterlist

[queenmuzz]

Deep Blue Sea: Chapter V

Prisoner’s Dilemma

Full story is on Ao3 here.

“...and we're expected to reach 4 percent growth this quarter,” the chief officer of finance droned on, “with a goal of ten percent growth at the end of the year. The Asian markets are causing immense growth, and our acquisition of Mallet Fisheries has opened us to the European markets, particularly among with herring and cod”

Your head nodded, and you were failing the to fight the urge to doze off, when you felt your knee being squeezed. You jerked, and looked to your right, to a apologetically smiling Fredrick. Hastily, you checked around at the other men and women at the mahogany table, to see if anyone else had noticed. Thankfully, they seemed all engrossed at the woman at the podium.

“Unfortunately, we may not reach our projected growth this year, due to unforeseen circumstances regarding mechanical issues with our ships, and especially the sinking of the Phantom.” You felt heat creep up your neck and face, you knew exactly what they were talking about. (The Phantom was one of the larger ships the company owned, to think Vergil could have single-handedly taken it down...wow, you were impressed).

“But nevertheless,” she continued, “We've been personally assured that the cause of these malfunctions have been taken care of, and we should not face anymore issues.” You grimaced, and then quickly checked if anyone else had seen your reaction, but even Fredrick hadn't seen anything, thank God.

“And with that,” she said, “I leave the last words to our wonderful owner.” A round of polite clapping followed as your father walked up up to podium, a big grin on his face. He adjusted his reading glasses, as he checked his notes. “As you know, my Father started this business as a small humble fleet of boats, set on the east coast, and was very happy at how it grew and prospered. When he passed it down to me, he told me, 'Son, this is your family legacy. Take care of it as if it was your own child. Nurture it, support it, watch it grow and succeed. And one day, you will see it grow up more than you could have ever hoped.'” He smiled and looked up. “When my father handed me the company, it was large, a dominant fishing fleet that covered the east coast. And several decades later, we've managed to make our family business fully live up to it's name. Mundus is the Latin word for 'The World', and I am proud to see the the company I've worked hard to build has truly lived to it's name. Mundus Ltd has truly become a worldwide company.”

He looked straight at you “Which is why I'm happy to announce that as of today, I'll be letting my daughter, and future son-in-law slowly take over the business.” Surprised murmurings came from the suits, which your father quickly quieted down. “Now don't worry, this transitional period will be at least five years, and possibly a whole decade, to make it as smooth as possible, and I'll be in charge up until the very end. No one's job is at risk. All I ask is that you would treat them as hospitably as you can, help them learn the ropes of this business, and by the time my daughter is ready to take the reins, you'll barely notice the difference. Does anyone have any questions, for me or for our future leaders?”

Thankfully, the boardroom was full of people who were thinking exactly like you, and wanting to get out, asap, so no hands were raised. “Well, that about wraps this meeting up, thank you all for attending, we'll meet up in a few weeks time.” Your father said, as the board members attempted to not look to eager to leave the room. You attempted to do the same, but unfortunately, your dad intercepted you, “I know it's a lot of pressure, to live up to this responsibility, but I'm sure with just a few years of training, you'll be ready to take over your legacy. After all, it's in the blood, right?” He laughed as he placed his hand on your shoulder, “Let's go out for a business lunch, I can show you the basics”

You wanted to decline, but Fredrick saved the day. “Sorry sir, but we've already planned our lunch together,” which you father seemingly was fine with.

“Have fun, you lovebirds!” he called out as you left the building, causing you to blush immensely.

*****

You sat in the booth, poking at your salad. You'd at first been happy that Fredrick had 'rescued' you from the attentions of your father, but now you were regretting it, since your fiance was a bit nervous, a bit distant. He kept glancing at his phone, like he was expecting a call, and it was getting a bit annoying.

“So, you expecting someone?” you attempted to ask nonchalantly, after his sixth checkup.

He sighed apologetically, “I'm sorry, my dad is expecting me home soon, he has business dealings with a Japanese engineering firm he wants me to be a part of, but we're not sure when they will show up, their flight might be a bit early. He paused, took a drink of his water, and stiffened, “which is what I wanted to talk to you about.”

“What does this have to do with me?” you asked, somewhat nervously.

He sighed, as if he really didn't want this conversation. “It looks like my father wants me to head with the engineering team back to Japan to oversee the construction and operation of the new fish processing plant.”

You were relieved. It wasn't something bad at all, he was just nervous about the 'promotion' “Oh that's great! It's wonderful that you're father trusts you with such an important task. I'm sure you'll do great at it.”

He grimaced, “Yeah... that's the problem. I'll be out of the country for nearly ten and half months...”

You mentally calculated... you'd been engaged for a month, and in that time you'd seen Fredrick a grand total of... four days. That would leave...

“You'll only have a half a month to get ready before the wedding?!”

“Yeah, I know, I brought this up with my dad, but he said that this couldn't wait.... this was the perfect opportunity to get my feet wet in the business, and that I'd be a fool to miss this,” he said sheepishly.

“But the planning... I thought we were going to do this together!”

“We can, I won't be in the middle of nowhere, I'll have 24/7 internet access.”

“That won't help me with contacting vendors, caterers, and convention areas... it won't help me choose flowers or who to invite and who's persona non grata to the ceremony,” you protested.

Your fiance gritted his teeth as his head “Look, my father said that was usually the reserve of the ladies, and you're getting a top notch wedding planner, so how hard could it be? By the time I come back, the only thing we'll need is the tuxedo fitting, and we'll be good to go.”

“How hard could it be!?” you wanted to scream, but you couldn't start a scene in public. Besides, he had a point, how many months had he gone without seeing you while you were busy on you studies? He deserved this chance to make something of himself, even if it put more of a burden on you. It wouldn't be fair to him to deny him this, not when you were comfortable at home, no expectations... just arrange a wedding, and learn how your father's business ran. Still, you had hoped that both of you would be able to do this as a team....

“Alright, I guess. I mean, I won't deny that I'm disappointed...but do you really want this?”

He placed his hand on yours, and smiled apologetically. “Yes, although I wish it was at any other time of my life. It's a shame how life likes to throw curve balls at us. Now,” he said as he waved a passing waiter for the check, “Let me drive you home, and I'll get you my future contact info.”

*****

Fredrick pulled into your driveway, and hurriedly got out to open the door for you. He was always so gentlemanly about it, and even when it occasionally annoyed you, you couldn't bear to tell him to stop.

“We've arrived, milady” he joked as he escorted you to your front door. As you went through your keys to get the correct one, you paused. Your fiance had not been to your place since the aquarium was set up, and hadn't been told about Vergil. In fact, aside from your father and 'Doctor' Griffon, you were pretty sure no one knew about the merman.

What was strange was that you weren't worried about what Fredrick would think of Vergil, it was more of what Vergil would Fredrick. Would he see him as an intruder? What nonsense! In the past month, with your daily conversations, you'd told him many things about yourself, your family (although you had wisley steered away from talking about your father) friends, and... your fiance. What had Vergil called him? Ah, yes, 'Future Bondmate'. Merfolk seemed to have the romantic terms for everything. Surely he would be understanding enough that he would see Fredrick was no threat.

“Having trouble, honey?” Fredrick's voice intruded into your thoughts.

“I'm sorry, between all the keys from the estate, it's always hard to find the right one.” You fingered each key on the ring. One for your father's place, one for the warehouse on the estate, one to you mother's... and of course, one to Fredrick's place. Not to mention the ones to the private dock where you and your father kept your boats.

“Ah, here it is” you pulled it out in victory, and you inserted the key, and turned. “Now I must warn you, my place is a bit different since you last came over...” but by then it was too late, your fiance had inadvertently pushed you aside to get a better look at the aquarium. Could you really blame him? He didn't quite share the same fascination of the oceans as you, but only a curmudgeon would fail to appreciate the beauty of such an extravagant aquarium. He marveled at the coral, the rocks, the fish...

But not Vergil.

The merman was nowhere to be seen. You panicked for a brief moment, worried that Vergil had attempted an escape, and was currently stuck or hurt. But then you saw just a flicker of movement, from behind one of the farther rocks, nearly imperceptible to anyone who didn't know there was something there in the first place. Vergil, cautious as ever (and could you blame him?) had obviously heard a stranger, and decided retreat was the wisest course of action. “Amazing, your father really has outdone himself this time.” He observed a school of angelfish swim past. “It will be a bit of a hassle to move it to my place after the wedding...”

“Wait” you interrupted, jokingly “Who's to say I'm moving in with you?”

“I need to be close to my business, and close to the airport should I need to make an emergency trip to one of the factories.” he said, straight faced.

You realized he wasn't joking, and you protested “But this is my place, my home... we haven't even discussed our living arrangements yet.”

He seemed to have grasped quickly what you were talking about. “Sorry, I really shouldn't have assumed....Look, we don't have to move in all the way, you can keep this place as your home, live at my place part time, it's not really going to be that far, just a half hour drive if the traffic is good. We can even-” he was interrupted by a incessant buzzing, and he grabbed his phone, looking at message. “Aw damn, looks like their flight has arrived.” He began walking to the door, with you following. “Look, I'll try to call you every night, you work out all the arrangements, and I'll say yes to everything and anything you want. I want this to be the day you always dreamed about.” He gave you a quick kiss on the lips, before opening the front door, and running to his car. He pulled out at an alarming rate of speed, waving to you the entire time. You reciprocated, smiling and waving all the while until he was out of sight. Only then did your arm slowly fall down, and your smile fade.

Slowly closing the door, you trudged inside, before flopping down on the couch. It was only early afternoon, and yet you were exhausted. You were could only deal with so much personal interaction for so long without starting to break down. And now you were expected to take care of every single detail of this wedding. And it was going to be big wedding, you knew that. It would have been nice if the workload had been sha-

“So that is your bondmate to be?”  Vergil's inner voice gently prodded you from your anxiety inducing thoughts. You looked back at the aquarium glass, where he floated silently. Only now did you notice that his once pale tale was now speckled with blue scales, and his fins now had more of a blueish tint to them, unrelated to the lights of the aquarium.

“Yeah, that's Fredrick,” you waited for his judgement, no doubt negative, as Vergil had a very low opinion of humans in general.

“He seems like a good man” he responded, and you smiled. Perhaps he wasn't the curmudgeon you thought he was.

“But you do not love him.”

You did a double take, “Wait, what do you mean?”

He kept his eyes on you, but not in a judgmental way, “The way you talk to him, the physical gestures, the way you smile...” you thought about how he was watching you smile, and you felt bubbly inside, before shoving it back down.  “You do not hate him, nor dislike him, but as a bondmate....” he hesitated before continuing on “he is not what you wish for the rest of your life. Which perplexes me, why do you go through with this?”

You thought about the first part. Vergil was correct, while you and Fredrick were good friends, almost best friends, you couldn't really take it to the next level. But the wedding... once you were married, things would work out.

“It's more complicated than that, Vergil. Humans don't always marry for love, it's actually a relatively new concept, especially among upper classes. We usually married to bind families together, whether property, land, or power. Hopefully, love was added benefit.”

“Strange” the merman mused, “Perhaps it is due to humans and their need for possessions has superseded other concerns. We merfolk do not have such concerns, and as such, we value our connections, with out family, friends, our... bondmates. To create such a connection” he said seriously, and you realized this was the first you'd heard about mer culture, “is a life long commitment, one that has power that is.... inexplicable” You hesitated, worried at that you would bring up bad memories, “Vergil...do you...have a bondmate?”

He was taken aback, and he backed up for a tense moment, “No.... I was a bit of an oddity, I preferred to go my way for the past few years. Perhaps in a few years... if ...” his eyes seemed to dim, and he looked like he was staring at nothing.

“Vergil,” you said softly, and the alertness returned, but not to the same exact level as before, “The offer is still on the table, if you want to leave, I'll get you to the ocean.” You had expected him to either happily take the offer, or return to his angry state and denial. You didn't expect a small, sad smile.

“The offer is appreciated whether you place it on a table or in the aquarium, but I must decline...for now.”

“Well, if you ever change your mind, at any time, I'll do it. I don't want you to be a prisoner here.”

“We seem to have that in common...” he chuckled without mirth, causing you to cock your head in confusion. “You do not wish to see me a prisoner of this cage and I...” he paused, “I do not wish to see you a prisoner of expectations....”

And with that, he (rapidly) swam away, leaving you flummoxed, confused, and suddenly rather disconcerted.

#Devil May Cry #Deep Blue Sea #Vergil #Vergil x Reader #Mergil #Vergill

[dearlazerbunny]

Lie to Me (Ch. 27 of 27)

Pairings: Loki x Reader

Genre/Ratings: M eventually (aiming for a slow burn here); warnings for kidnapping and subsequent anxiety/PTSD (will be marked before every chapter)

Words: 3100

Summary: If you had to guess what the captured, traitor, trickster god Loki Laufeyson wanted or needed at this moment, a babysitter would be far, far down on the list. (Set after the events of Avengers 1.)

SHOUTOUT TO @molmcb and @jessiejunebug, the absolute loves of my life

Requested Tags: @deraniel, @iamverity,  @yasnooshka24, @wegingerangelica, @themusingsofmany , @dark-night-sky-99, @tarynkauai, @stuffandstuff-stuff, @angelicshinigami, @my-current-fandom-is, @geekysimmerthings,           @lokis-butter-knife, @help-i-need-a-social-life, @vodka-and-some-sass, @pandacookieowo

EPILOGUE

“Are you positive you wish to do this?”

You roll your eyes and shove a finger into Loki’s side. “Yes, Loki, I’m sure. Just as sure as I was ten minutes ago when you asked me, and the thirty minutes before that.”

He holds up his hands in mock defeat, a gentle smile on on face at your exasperation. “Yes, yes. Pardon my concern at your self destructive nature.”

“Okay, first of all, I’m pretty certain everyone already knows; second, being associated with you is not self destructive.”

“They still do not trust me.”

“That’s their problem.”

“Witling-”

“No, no, stop that. No coercing me with nicknames.” You grab his hand and entwine your fingers together. They fit together perfectly, just as they always have. “I love you, and I don’t give a damn if SHIELD, Bill Nye, and the freaking Queen of England knows or cares.” You wrinkle your nose at him, and he wrinkles his back, though it’s halfhearted. “You’re stuck with me. Suck it up, buttercup.”

Loki sighs and rubs a thumb over your own in small, comforting circles, eyes watching the city pass by as you weave through traffic. “I do not wish to bring malice upon you simply because you walk by my side. It isn’t worth the prejudice or the risk.”

The resignation in his voice makes your heart sink. He’s been training with the Avengers for a bit over a month now, and you’ve hoped that they’d be a little more open minded about their new teammate once they got to know him. Apparently that hasn’t been the case. You tighten your grip on his hand and scoot over so you can let your head settle in the crook of his neck. “Look, Loki. I don’t want to cause you any trouble either. If you really don’t want to tell SHIELD about us, fine. It’s more your head than mine after all. I just- I never want you to think that I’m ashamed of you. Ever.” You let your chin perch on the bony part of his shoulder and give him a wicked grin. “Plus, I’ve taken on Stark before. He’s just an asshole; I can handle him.”

“Please do not ever do that again.” He boops your nose lightly with his own before you pull away. “My healing skills are nowhere near sufficient enough to mend a repulser blast to the stomach.”

“I’m wounded!” Dramatically, you put a hand to your heart, pretending to swoon into the car door. “My one true love, unwilling to save me from death’s door!”

“I’ve done it once,” he reminds you firmly. “And I do not care to ever repeat the experience.”

“Fair enough.”

The car comes to a stop, and while Loki busies himself with opening your door, you grab your bag and your crutch from where it leans against the seat next to you. Your ankle is permanently problematic, unfortunately, and save for going in and replacing everything with steel, there’s nothing the doctors can really do. You never planned on going out for the Olympics, so you decided to just let it be. A crutch really isn’t that hard to maneuver anyways. And sometimes, if you whine enough, Loki will pick you up bridal-style and carry you around the apartment, even though the kitchen is less than ten feet away.

You’ve decided he probably secretly likes it.

The compound hasn’t gotten any more colorful or any less huge since you’ve been away. It was a bit strange, finally getting around to the paperwork and legalities and clearance of getting yourself reinstated at your job after basically disappearing for a year, but the second you step inside you know you’ve made the right choice. It’s a strange sort of home, with its stern-faced agents and terrible coffee and casually world-threatening incidents on any given Tuesday. Having Loki by your side, and not in a cell, makes it that much better. You can’t hold his hand while you walk, but he knows exactly where to step to avoid tripping you up; how far behind you to follow so he can support you if you need the help. The two of you being so in sync with such little effort always makes your heart happy.

You get a few hesitant nods from colleagues as you pass, and a deliberately blank stare from Sitwell, which you ignore. Deep breaths. You’re fine, he’s fine. This is just day one. It’ll pass.

You’re about to give him a peck on the cheek goodbye and turn off into your own hallway of offices when an intern appears, looking scared out of his mind. “Mister- um- mister Loki? Sir? The others are waiting for you in the training facilities.” He at least waits until Loki acknowledges him with a nod before scurrying away like he’s fleeing for his life, but- wow.

“Is it always like that?” You give him a glance. He’s watching the intern practically sprint down the hallway.

“Unfortunately.” He must sense your annoyance, because his next question can only be a distraction: “would you like to come see?”

You raise an eyebrow at him. You’ve asked several times what this group training entails, but he’s always avoided it or been extremely vague. Mostly you just want to make sure he isn’t getting hurt, and see if you need to punch Tony Stark’s face in. “Really?”

He nods. “This way.”

The training facilities turn out to be another building entirely, most likely constructed for the superheroes to do their… superhero-ing? Without breaking SHIELD’s fancy chrome offices or some poor intern’s leg. He opens the door for you and you duck in, unsure of what to expect.

The room is massive, and the ceiling is so far up you can’t even see it- the roof just ascends into shadow. The ridiculously high-tech looking screens and simulators are at odds with bare-bones gym mats lining the floor and a couple of old-timey punching bags hanging in the corner. Currently, the Black Widow and Captain America appear to be sparring, as both are on the floor with the Widow’s thighs wrapped around the Captain’s neck in a very unpleasant looking hold. Clint Barton looks on appreciatively from the sidelines. Stark is half dressed in his metal suit, fiddling with a hologram hovering in front of his face, and-

“LADY Y/N!” Before you can blink, you’re whisked into someone’s absolutely massive arms so quickly your crutch goes clattering to the floor. His voice booms in your ears, but you just laugh as you’re spun into the air, because only one person can have that loud a voice and that big of a bicep.

“Thor!” You wrap your arms around his neck, giggling as you receive one of the most enthusiastic hugs you’ve ever experienced. It’s like being tackled by a mountain of golden retrievers. “I didn’t know you’d be here!”

“Aye, I wished to surprise you!” Loki, who is watching amusedly from a few feet away, gives you a wink. “My brother aided me in my deception!”

“I can see that,” you laugh, tapping him on the shoulder so he’ll put you down before you suffocate. “Careful you don’t pick up too many of his bad habits.”

He laughs heartily. “It has been many moons. How fares my little sister?” He picks up your brace and hands it to you, but does so casually, as though nothing has changed. Loki must have filled him in, thank god. The last thing you need is for him to cause an impromptu thunderstorm over a limp.

“As good as I can be.” You grin at him, genuinely thrilled to see him. He tucks an arm around your shoulder protectively and gives you another squeeze, almost lifting you off the floor again.

“Please do not hurt the witling, brother. Mortals are such delicate things.” You stick your tongue out at Loki’s teasing but take his hand as you’re finally set on the floor properly, helping you steady yourself.

With the absence of Thor’s booming, you’re suddenly aware of the rest of the room and their incredibly loud silence. The Captain and Romanov, at least, are pretending to be uninterested while they discuss tactics and maneuvers, but Stark and Barton are openly, unabashedly staring at the three of you. Barton can’t take his eyes off the crutch tucked under your arm. You take a breath- you weren’t really planning on meeting them again- well, ever- but might as well get it over with. “Um, hi. Agent Barton. Stark.” You’re not really sure what to say next: ‘sorry about the screaming match we had?’ ‘No hard feelings?’

Unfortunately, Stark takes care of that little dilemma for you. He’s watching you with undisguised disgust. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Steve Rogers looks over sharply. “Tony-”

“No! This is- this is absolutely ridiculous! This is insane. How the hell has SHIELD not mind wiped you and shipped you off to Antarctica yet? And you just waltz in here like nothing’s even happened?”

Every one of your nerves is immediately set on fire. You are not going to be cannon fodder for some stuck-up playboy. “Listen, Stark, I don’t answer to you, and whatever I do with my life is absolutely none of your-”

“What happened to your leg?”

The archer’s question is quiet. Unobtrusive, but yet somehow still louder than your rising voice. You blink at him. “Some HYDRA idiot crushed my ankle. Doctors can’t fix it.”

For a second, you swear he’s going to be sympathetic, until he snorts. “Your boyfriend has enough magic in his fist to drop a small country, but he can’t fix an ankle.”

Loki immediately steps forward and puts a hand on your shoulder, effectively holding you in place. “Witling. You should go.”

“I’m not leaving you here with people who apparently still want to tear your fucking head off!” You snarl, nearly fumbling your crutch to the ground with how much your hands are shaking.

“He’s a criminal-”

“So are you, Stark! The army would love to hand you your ass!”

“I’d like to see them try.”

“Maybe we all just need to-”

“Steve, he murdered Coulson. Remember that? Remember your trading cards with his fucking blood on them?”

“Clint-”

“Never mind the fact that he tried to, I don’t know, enslave the human race! No big deal!”

“Glad to see at least one of us has a level head.”

“I swear to god if another one of you makes another sound I will-”

“IT WAS NOT HIS FAULT!” Thor roars, and this time the air is charged with the smell of ozone. Everyone falls quiet, even Stark, though his mouth is still open to toss out another retort. “It was not his fault,” Thor says again, quieter, but with just as much anger simmering below his voice. He turns to Loki. “Brother, I tire of this falsehood. If you will not tell them, then I shall.”

Loki’s eyes widen. “Thor-“

“Loki is as much a victim as any of us,” he says firmly, “for he too had lost his reason and control to the Mind Stone. His will was not his own.”

And if that doesn’t just make everyone’s jaw drop. You almost wish you could snap a photo. The Avengers are staring at Thor, and Loki looks like he’s about to smite himself out of existence where he stands, and you instinctively take a few steps toward Loki like you can somehow protect him from the coming onslaught. “Thor..? How did you-”

“When you mentioned to me the infinity stones, I decided to follow the path your questions led me down.” Thor shakes his head, more serious than you’ve ever seen him. “The truth is dark, and more troubling than I can say, but it is the truth nonetheless. Loki is not at fault.”

Loki shoots you a venomous glare, and you hold up your palms, trying to placate him. “I ask him back when I didn’t know what they were! When I didn’t know. I promise, I would never have told him the whole story. Not without your permission.”

His jaw is still clenched tight, and you can tell he’s struggling to control his breathing. But slowly, his fingers uncurl from fists on by one. “It appears we need to speak privately, brother.”

Thor nods. “Indeed. This is a burden you have been forced to shoulder for too long.”

Across the room, Stark begins to clap. It’s the slow, mocking clap of a person who just witnessed someone falling on their face and is too cruel to go and help them up. “Fabulous. Really, five stars, I’ll call the Broadway producers right now and have them set the whole thing up.”

You take in a sharp breath in favor of gasping out loud. Loki’s fury is slowly being eaten away by a painful resignation that makes you want to cry. Thor hasn’t quite caught on. “I beg your pardon, but I-”

“No, sorry. I just can’t buy this one. You actually expect us to believe that shit? You try to pass him off as the misunderstood villain all this time and then decided, whoops, guess what, he was actually brainwashed! None of it was his fault!” Stark shakes his head. “Unbelievable. Seriously.”

“I do not claim that I am purely innocent,” Loki says quietly. “Though what my brother says is largely true.”

“He told me himself,” you add, trying to send positive thoughts to the man standing beside you. You’re pretty sure grabbing his hand to comfort him wouldn’t be appreciated by anyone right now. “Back when he was in his cell. You can check the footage yourself.”

“Oh, I have no doubt he told you,” Stark sneers. “He told you a bunch of bullshit and you swallowed it hook, line, and sinker, like a good little pawn. And Thor, buddy, I’m sorry, but Loki has been feeding you lies his entire life and you just keep falling for them. Stop making excuses for him and accept the fact that he’s a fucking murderer!”

Stark’s voice has risen to a crescendo over the course of his little speech, and small pieces of his armor lock into place until he’s fully suited in metal, save for his helmet. The repulsors on his palms are glowing white hot. At some point, Rogers grabbed his shield, though he looks as though he isn’t sure whether to throw it at Tony or Loki. Barton is remarkably silent, standing completely still, not moving a single tick. His eyes have a horrible haunted sheen to them, as though he’s reliving a nightmare. Romanov is taking to him in low, worried tones, in- Russian, maybe?- but she doesn’t seem to be getting through to him.

Thor, for his part, is in a proper rage. Mjolnir flies to his grip, and small streaks of lighting are beginning to form at his wrists. “You dare insinuate I lie?”

Loki has visibly locked himself away; pushed any thought or feeling deep down and thrown away the key. His fingers are twitching like he’s searching for something to defend himself with, and the hard look on his face says he’s preparing to fight his way out.

And then there’s you, small and remarkably unremarkable, standing in the midst of gods and monsters about to throw themselves into a civil war. You want to scream, you want to throw yourself at Stark and claw him out of that stupid suit of his piece by piece until he knows what real pain feels like. You’re mad. Livid. Indescribably enraged. Something hot and mean is streaking through your veins, and you let it race through you like wildfire, coating your vision in sparks of white and making you feel like crushing a gang of superheroes beneath your heel will be child’s play.

Your fists close around something sharp and solid.

Things happen too quickly for you to process. Loki shouts, alarmed, and Stark’s eyes widen in something that looks like fear before raising his hand and firing off two bolts of energy directly at you. Thor throws Mjolnir to intercept, but not before Captain America flings himself between you and the beams of light, forcing them to ricochet off his shield and into the wall, where they leave scorch marks and the smell of molten metal.

There’s a stillness that falls over the room, ominous as a single black crow. You’re still angry, still running hot with this indescribable something, but your brain is somewhat back online- why did Stark just fire at you?

And why does everyone look so scared?

“Witling.” Loki’s voice, gentle and very calm, floats through the haze. “Put down the knives.”

The… knives? You want to ask him what he’s taking about, you want to say something, but everything in you is frozen, quivering, waiting to strike.

“Love. It’s just me. I’m right here. Don’t move-” you feel his hand around your wrist, then deftly flick… something… from your hand into his. The spell is shattered, and he world falls back into place with a rush of static and a ringing in your ears. Everything in you seems to slump, and something metallic clatters to the floor.

Everyone around you is still holding their breath, watching the timer of a bomb hold steady at 00:01.

You blink, suddenly incredibly tired and confused. “What- what just happened?”

“I believe,” Loki says, his voice outwardly calm but internally shaking like a leaf, “you just conjured yourself some daggers.”

“Excuse me?” When you look to your right, a gleaming knife, dark as night and etched with glowing runes carved into the hilt, lies at your feet. Its twin is in Loki’s hands.

Your eyes widen. “I- I what?”

A hundred dimensions away, overlooking Asgard’s city of gold, Frigga smiles.

A/N: So. Here it is. The longest fic I have ever written by over 20k. I wrote this fic during a kind of terrible time in my life. My waking hours were basically nothing but scrolling through Ao3, and once I’d read all the fics I liked three times over, I thought, well... write what you’d want to read, right? So I did. The amount of love I’ve gotten has been asTOUNDING. Like seriously, guys. Wow. Thank you so, so freaking much. You have absolutely no idea how much it means to me, and I want to personally give each and every one of you a huge hug. 

That being said... I, uh, kind of want there to be a sequel? Now, I started writing this fic in January of this year. I finished in September- that’s nine months. I only started posting when I had 35k written plus a very specific outline and idea of where everything was going. I have none of that for this sequel. I cannot promise this sequel will come soon. But I think it will happen, eventually. I like this world too much to let it go just yet. If you have notifications turned on for this fic’s updates, keep it, so six months from now you’ll know when I start posting the second part of the story. 

I’m still dealing with a lot right now. I’m not sure if it’s because of the completion of this basically-a-novel or my health or school or all of the above but I haven’t really written anything in months. It scares me a bit. I hope my need to write will come back soon. Until then, I’m excited to fulfill the prompts I promised, and you can always submit other things you’d like to see here or on my tumblr- I’ll post them on here as they get finished :)

Once again, thank you all SO much. Sometimes the only thing getting me through the days was the excitement of posting another chapter and getting to talk and laugh with you guys. I love you all so much.

#loki #Loki Laufeyson #loki fluff #loki fanfic #loki fic #loki angst #loki x reader #loki x you #reader insert #Long Reads #longform #marvel fic #marvel fanfiction #Thor Odinson #clint barton #tony stark #nick fury #maria hill #natasha romanov #bruce banner #odin’s a+ parenting #odin #frigga #nicknames #lie to me #dont lie to me

[suitofvibraniumarmor]

Yours Truly [Part Eleven]

Summary: Chris and Layla return from Minnesota.  Pairing: Chris Pratt x OFC, Chris Evans x OFC Word Count: 1810 Warnings: FLUFF. A/N: This fic was previously posted on my multi-fandom account; in honor of OC Appreciation Day, I figured I would queue it all up for your reading pleasure throughout the day! This was a collab with @captain-s-rogers , and I will link her chapters at the end of all of my posts! Some GIFs were difficult to find again, so if there’s no credit, they’re from Google Image Search or from the original post. 

July 13

Caroline,

I skipped a few days of letters, waiting for Chris to head to Minnesota. I dropped him at the Kansas City airport this morning, and in a couple of days, I’ll pick him and Layla up and bring them home.

I have an interview this afternoon with the elementary school that Layla will be going to. I’m excited, especially after having met a few of Layla’s friends at her party. They seem like good kids, and would be so fun to teach. I like the town, and staying close would be good.

How are things with Chris? Ugh, I’m so torn between wanting you to be able to keep your job and not have to deal with the media, but also wanting you two to be together! He’s just so perfect for you, and even seeing you on stage next to him – you’re adorable together. I hope you haven’t completely given up on him.

See how I’m avoiding talking about my Chris? I can’t even write the words, but I guess I have to since we have sworn off the phone again. The date was pure perfection. He made me dinner and we ate outside on the patio with the first sunflower blooms of the season in a vase on the table. We danced to that Billy Currington song I’ve always been obsessed with, and then it started to rain. We ran inside and he kissed me and then – don’t you DARE say I told you so! – told me that he loves me.

Caroline. Why does that terrify me? Chris is amazing. He makes me laugh – like really laugh, not the polite way like when something is kind of funny, but the kind of laugh that comes out when you don’t expect it.

I know why it terrifies me. It’s because he also told me that I filled a hole in their home. What if he only thinks that he loves me because I’m filling whatever void Emily left behind? Honestly though, I think that’s what worries me the most, and it’s because – am I really about to say this? – because I love him, too.

What the hell is going on with us, C?

Yours truly,

Sadie

After donning the same outfit she had worn for her date with Chris, Sadie tucked the letter into her bag to mail out later, and headed for the elementary school.

Mr. McCaffree, the elementary school principal, greeted Sadie cheerfully when she arrived, and welcomed her right into his office. He asked all the usual interview questions, and seemed very impressed with Sadie overall.

“I do have a couple of other interviews, one today and one tomorrow, but I have to tell you, Ms. Coleman, they’ll be hard-pressed to do better than you,” Mr. McCaffree told her with a smile. “But you didn’t hear that from me.”

Sadie smiled back. “Thank you, sir. I appreciate that.”

He nodded. “I’ll call you by Friday.”

“Sounds great,” Sadie replied, shaking hands with the man. “Thank you.”

She left the school, stopped at the post office, and then headed back to the farm. She changed into a tank top and shorts, and decided to take a walk around the property. With the distraction of the interview over, there was only one thing on her mind.

The last few days with Chris had been wonderful. He had apologized immediately after blurting out that he loved her, assured her that he wasn’t out to rush her and there was no agenda behind his spontaneous confession.

“You’ve stolen my heart,” he sighed before kissing her knuckles. “I don’t expect things to happen so quickly for you, but, please, tell me I haven’t ruined what we’ve started.”

Sadie had assured him that nothing was ruined. Though she knew she felt the same way, she didn’t let on to that fact — simply told Chris that rushing things would likely ruin the connection between them, and she didn’t want that.

“It’s more and more clear the longer I’m here, there’s a reason this job posting came to my attention. There’s a reason it all worked out so well, losing my job back home but finding an opportunity here with you and Layla. But, I don’t want to lose this, either.”

They had spent the rest of the evening talking on the couch, once they changed into dry clothes. Sadie avoided going to bed, knowing the storm would keep her awake; Chris wasn’t in any hurry to leave her while she was frightened. They fell asleep together on the couch, comfortable and warm.

The next couple of days after that, Chris gave her her space to process his confession. He was always open when she approached him, but wasn’t in her presence more often or for longer than need be. The night before he left for Minnesota, Chris took her out to dinner in town. Their interactions were easy and comfortable, despite the confusion and uncertainty Sadie was experiencing about their feelings for each other.

At the airport that morning, Chris had kissed her sweetly and promised to call when he could. It was a short flight to Minneapolis, but there would be a couple hours’ drive to the town where his parents lived. Sadie had a lot to think about, but so did Chris. After all, he hadn’t planned on saying what he said; he hadn’t planned on falling in love with the woman he hired to teach and care for his daughter over the summer – and certainly not so quickly.

No closer to reconciling her mixed-up feelings on the matter, Sadie wandered into the shed. She had been in this building only once before, and that was to retrieve Layla who had gone out under the pretense of asking her father a question, then stuck around to bug him.

She looked around at the tools in the shed, recognizing some and wondering about the purpose of others. Finally, she came to Chris’s workbench, smiling at the pictures of Layla from over the short years of her life. Finally, she found a copy of the picture of Sadie and Layla from Layla’s birthday party. Sadie remembered making an extra copy for Chris, but never thought he would put it up anywhere. She took the photo down from where it was taped to the inside of a tool box lid, studying the image for a few moments before flipping it over.

“My girls at Layla’s fifth birthday party,” Sadie read on the back of the photo. As a smile spread across her face, she repeated, “My girls.”

With those two words, every bit of confusion was erased from Sadie’s mind – and her heart.

When the day came for Sadie to pick up Chris and Layla from the Kansas City airport, she was so excited, she left the farm a full hour sooner than necessary. The house had been too quiet without Layla, and just plain lonely over the few days that Chris was gone.

While she waited for their flight to arrive, she sat and read a book, although she was so excited, she had to read several of the pages two or three times. Focusing on the content of the book was not her mind’s priority.

“Adie!”

Sadie dropped her book just in time for Layla to launch herself into Sadie’s arms. Sadie squeezed the little girl tight, feeling relieved at having her charge home once more.

“Did you have so much fun with Grandma and Grandpa?” Sadie asked.

Layla nodded earnestly. “I did! I have something for you, but you have to have it at home Daddy said because it’s in my suitcase.”

“Fair enough,” Sadie chuckled, tucking her book back into her bag and handing the keys over to Chris. “Glad you’re home.”

“Me too,” he smiled, as Layla ran ahead to the baggage claim. “I haven’t told her about us yet. I thought I’d let you decide when you’re ready for that.”

“Soon,” Sadie promised. “Layla, sweetie, stay where we can see you, please!”

Chris’s and Layla’s suitcases showed up about ten minutes later. Once the car was loaded up, they were headed back home. Another rainstorm had set in on the last twenty minutes of the drive, which meant Layla and Sadie made a mad rush for the house when they arrived, while Chris grabbed the luggage and ran in behind them.

“Daddy, now can I give Adie her present?” Layla pleaded.

“Take your bag to your room, let Sadie help you unpack. You can give her your present while you’re in there.”

The two girls made way for the bedroom. Sadie retrieved Layla’s dirty clothes for the laundry, while Layla dug for an envelope. Adiewas scrawled across the front of the photo envelope in Layla’s handwriting; Sadie smiled and took out the paper folded inside.

“Is this us?” Sadie asked, her heart swelling with love.

Layla nodded. “That’s me an’ you an’ Daddy! With the sunflowers. See?”

Sadie looked at the picture, unable to stop her smile. In the picture, the three of them were holding hands, and each one had a red heart on their shirt.

“It’s ‘cause we all love each other,” Layla said, pointing at the hearts.

Sadie held the picture to her chest. “I’ll treasure it always, Layla. Thank you, so much.”

Together they finished unpacking the suitcase, then Sadie tucked the picture safely away in the nightstand in the guest room, under Layla’s close supervision.

“I thought you two went to bed!” Chris teased. “Who wants to watch a movie?”

“Me!” Layla replied, jumping up and down. “Can we have popcorn? And get pizza?”

Chris exchanged a look with Sadie, who shrugged. “I suppose coming back from vacation is a good time for a movie night. You got it.”

“Yay!” Layla cheered, dancing around.

With a little more convincing by the five-year-old, every pillow and blanket in the house was constructed into a fort-type structure for them to watch movies. While Chris went into town to get the pizza, Sadie helped Layla with her bath, got her into pajamas, and braided her hair. Sadie braided her hair as well, got into a pair of sweats and a tank top, and kept Layla busy until Chris returned.

They only made it through a portion of the first movie before Layla was asleep between the two of them. Chris picked her up and tucked her into bed, returning a few minutes later. He put his arm around Sadie’s shoulders; she tucked her head against his chest.

“Missed you while you were gone,” she told him.

“Missed you, too,” Chris said, laying a soft kiss on her lips. “Up for another movie?”

In truth, Sadie was feeling tired, but to be there cuddled with Chris in a pillow and blanket fort – she would never be tired enough to turn that down.

Part Twelve

#chris pratt #chris evans #fanfiction #oc appreciation day 2020 #new to this blog

[charmandhex]

Taako is warm. The bed is warm, the knit blanket from Istus is warm, the cats are warm. It’s blissfully cozy, and with a still half-asleep sigh, Taako rolls over to find his husband.

The sheets are cold. And Kravitz is gone. In a moment, Taako’s eyes are wide open, all traces of softness that crept in with sleep gone from his face, and he sits bolt upright, shedding cats and blankets alike. Kravitz is gone?

It’s then that he becomes conscious of a periodic scraping sound, from outside the house. Delicate brows furrowing in bewilderment, Taako quickly shoves his feet into slippers and drapes the oversized and impossibly soft gift from Istus over himself like a cloak, the only skin exposed his face and the hand holding the blanket closed to preserve a cocoon of warmth.

Taako thumps down the stairs gracelessly, cats following in his currently less than regal wake. But listen, looking good is for a reasonable, non-morning hour and making your husband fall in love with you again for the nineteenth time that day. And the noise isn’t a problem; Angus is probably up already reading, the nerd. Probably reading one of Taako’s old IPRE books. Again, listen, takes a nerd to know a nerd.

Taako makes his way to the front door and opens it, drawing backward from the frigid blast of air billowing inward in greeting, the telltale crisp smell of winter sharp in his nose. It snowed last night.

And there is the source of the noise, answering two questions Taako had and a third he had not asked. Kravitz and Angus, bundled up so snugly that Taako is surprised the kid can move his arms, have been shoveling along their walkway to the street. And they’re practically done already.. While Taako might raise an eyebrow at the needless labor (you’re both magic boys, aren’t you?), they seem to have already constructed their own reward, a methodically built snow fort.

“You have magic! I did not teach you Mage Hand for you to pick up a shovel with your own, Agnes!” Taako calls down, and Angus looks up, cheeks red from cold and effort and eyes practically glowing with childlike wonder or some shit.

“Sir, we made a fort!”

“I can see that.” Taako turns, shutting the door behind him. Might as well get the hot chocolate going; they’ll be in soon enough.

Sure enough as Taako is melting chocolate down, standing comfortably in his pajamas in his kitchen with the blanket from Istus thrown over a chair, he hears the front door smoothly swing open and closed, the kitchen luckily too far for the admitted cold air to reach him, and then the sound of various layers and snow boots being shucked in the front hall. Footsteps follow.

“Angus is still outside, stockpiling snowballs for when Magnus comes by,” Kravitz says, and that’s all the warning Taako gets before two ice cold arms encircle him from behind and an ice cold face buries itself in his neck. Taako yelps.

“Krav, what the fuck?” Taako attempts to wiggle away, but the only thing that gets him is his cheek in contact with the snowflakes that still dot Kravitz’s hair and which immediately melt on Taako’s face.

“Mm, warm,” Kravitz responds, seemingly perfectly content now. Despite his husband’s attempts to escape.

“Yeah, no shit, ‘cause you’re a fuckin’ ice cube. Why do you like this frozen hellscape anyway?”

“Cold, quiet. Peaceful.” Kravitz lets out a soft, content-sounding sigh, which would be adorable, if his breath didn’t immediately raise goosebumps where it hits Taako’s skin. Well, it’s still adorable. Just icy.

“Up until your husband tries to freeze you to death.”

“I would never.”

“You definitely tried. But with crystal.” Taako points out, stirring vanilla into the hot chocolate now.

“That was years ago!”

“And Merle still holds it against Magnus.” Taako feels Kravitz’s grin against his skin and grins himself.

“Mm. It’s... the world is resting, waiting for a new day. Kinda, uh, kinda like me, like I was. And then I met three idiots who died too many times in a half-assed nerd necromancer’s lab. And I gave them a chance to stay alive. And you gave me a chance at the same thing. Even if, even if we had no idea what we were doing at the time.” Kravitz shrugs.

“Oh, uh... by the way... happy almost anniversary, babe.” Taako says casually, schooling his face into neutrality but feeling his ears give him away as they quiver in restrained mirth.

“Huh, oh, uh, yeah, Candlenights is coming up fast, and- Taako. Did. Did you just. Did you just imply that Candlenights is our anniversary?” Kravitz sounds incredibly offended at the intimation, and Taako bursts into peels of laughter.

“Listen. That is when we met. And you agreed before you thought about it.”

“Babe, as you said moments ago, I tried to kill you then.”

“And I tentacled your dick. All’s fair in love and war and all that. That’s a Taako Original right there. Trademark trademark trademark.” With Kravitz’s arms more loosely wrapped around him (and rather warmer) now, Taako is able to turn to peck his husband on the cheek. “Guess, uh, guess we both really did end up with a second chance outta that, huh, Krav?” Taako says, more thoughtfully, the question half to himself as he moves the hot chocolate off the heat, waving the burner off with a cantrip.

“Yes. Yes, we did. And I intend to take advantage of every opportunity that presents itself, from snow days with Angus to the plane’s craziest dinner with the wildest family of any plane. And even absurd ones like first dates at the Chug and Squeeze.” Kravitz teases gently with an even gentler smile.

“Well, your proposal turned into fighting necromancers.” Taako retorts, sticking his tongue out before turning and wrapping his own arms fully around his husband, pressing his forehead against Kravitz’s.

Kravitz is warm. Taako is warm.

Life is good.

#taz #taz balance #taako #kravitz #taakitz #angus mcdonald #taz fic #taz fanfic #charm works #i was too tired to write chapter 12 so i started writing taakitz snow day #and then it just kind of spiraled away from me into 1000 words of fluff #i was supposed to be asleep but then i started writing