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angelmichelangelo · 3 years

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i’m about five years too late and nobody asked for this except me and i need to just get this out of my brain because it’s 2am so here’s a list of things i wish happened on glee that didn’t HERE WE GO:

- new directions being actual teenagers. just them hanging out. going to group sleepovers. giant study sessions (because school exists in this universe?) like remember in tpp when they were eating lunch together ? that’s what i wanted MORE of. just them being actual friends. a sleepover episode is all i wanted imagine all the abba songs we could have gained from that episode

- a halloween themed episode. the closest to this that we got was the ‘thriller/heads will roll’ mashup which YES was iconic but im greedy and it’s not enough. my idea for a halloween episode is that the gang gets trapped inside the school after staying behind to idk rehearse? or something? and then things get progressively worse as they start to go a little mad, thinking the school is haunted and they split up into pairs trying to find an escape and they think they’re seeing ghosts/someone lurking around the school and they’re getting real spooked but it turns out it’s just sue fucking with them lmao

- kurt and finn being brothers. THE POTENTIAL WAS THERE and sadly after furt we are left with crumbs. why ?? WHY?? little moments like finn saying that he’s driving back home with kurt or them saying they can’t do something because they have a family thing would have been good enough. more scenes of them hanging out in their home with their parents would have been *chefs kiss* but alas. it never happened because glee writers are bastards

- based off my last point: sam actually living at the hudson-hummel house because he actually did live there? but nothing is ever said like what’s the dynamic there why weren’t kurt and sam and finn close if they all lived together for what? like a year? was sam living in the mf shed? did he ever get close to carole and burt?? where tf did he live when everyone went off to college did he just stay in their house lol who knows not me LMAO

- blaine dealing with his trauma ? mental health was never dealt with very well on this show. emma’s ocd was just ignored after she got married or whatever and blaine mentioned his trauma once and then it was ignored until it was mentioned in passing a few seasons later and even he just brushed it off and it was never brought up again like wtf. i have no idea how they wrote a whole episode about hate crime in bash and they never once thought to have blaine and kurt have a single conversation together, let alone a conversation about how they’d both been victims of a hate crime. AND THE ONLY TIME BLAINE DOES MENTION IT IS IN TESTED WHERE ITS JUST USED AS A REASON FOR THEM TO FIGHT AAAAAAAA no wait im calm it’s okay. i just would have liked to have seen kurt and blaine have an emotional moment together in that episode that didn’t include blaine singing and kurt being knocked tf out. just sayin.

- kurt dealing with HIS trauma !! again, glee gets bad points for talking about mental health and it just is crazy that they had so much potential with kurt, ie: depression, anxiety, ocd (kinda?) his bullying, being literally assaulted (i see u ryan murphy taking that whole plot line so loosely mmhm) and then shoehorning in the fact that he was suicidal AT THE SECOND TO LAST EPISODE when they had a whole episode about suicide and they could have mentioned it at any time but ofc they didn’t because the writers just wanted to shove in as much as they could in the flashback episode AYE AYE AYE the potential!!!! oof.

- literally just more tina. jenna ushkowitz is a fantastic actor/singer/preformer and she was criminally underused. i like the episode props because of two reasons: one. everyone switching characters was amazing. and two. some actual tina scenes. even if she.. technically was rachel but also herself or something? either way. i digress

- this is just in general but MORE ABBA AND ALSO THE CARPENTERS and also some sound of music songs would have worked GREAT but they already had like a million songs and as the show progressed they veered away from old songs and more towards popular songs at the time to help chart numbers blah blah blah whatever it’s cool. but also how did they only do a few abba songs that is criminal

- a more fleshed out ending that wasn’t so rushed. like rachel won a tony and everyone else is just? there? why is sam at mr shue’s house ??? how did artie get up the stairs? did quinn graduate from yale? and where tf was kurt and blaine’s child during ‘i lived’ because burt and carole are vibing in the audience and rachel isn’t pregnant so like? is the baby just?? alone somewhere in the wings?! lmao where are u bby girl!! but once again i know they didn’t have the time to do it so idk it’s fine what they did it just sucks we didn’t get more! but again. fanfic exists so yah im all good

- more of blaine’s mum. or mom, in this case i guess. why cast gina gershon and then give her ONE line like ? ik there was a whole deleted script that explained why she was there but i love that up until that point blaine seemed like he genuinely murdered his parents, lived in their big house all alone and when people got suspicious he just told them that they were “out of town” :) either way pam is great i love her and i wish she had more to do in the one episode she was ever in. not even a moment with blaine?? wasted.

- more of cooper anderson, matt boomer is so fucking funny everytime i think of the emotion tornado i bust a lung laughing like it’s so fucking stupid but oh my good i love it. (and if you haven’t watched the special feature of cooper’s transformers audition tape please please watch it because it’s just so funny.) ik he was just a special guest but i wish they got him back for at least the wedding ep but guess my mans was just busy. boo ;(

- going back a couple of points, i wish they’d done a whole episode like props. every actor here just shines when they’re impersonating each other. finn and puck as kurt and blaine is beautiful and quinn and sugar is incredible. also idk why they refused kevin the right to wear the cheerios skirt; they could have put a little more effort into some characters but that’s glee for ya lmao but yeah. a whole episode like that would have been so much fun

- they should have let chris colfer write more episodes. purely for the fact that he wrote with his own bare hands the whole scene where lea michelle’s character gets dragged down a road by dogs. this guy. it’s a shame he only got to write one since he actually did a really good job! i would have loved to have seen what other episode ideas he had :)

- glee in the summer! obviously it only was centred around the school year but after season 3 who honestly gave a shit about the glee club and mckinley lmao i wanna see them in SHORT SHORTS and POOL PARTIES but nope we just got september - june so like rip all my hopes and dreams

- WHAT HAPPENED TO DALTON? bitch just burst into flames ?? and for WHAT?? oh yeah plot convenience smh this is so sad i wish they’d either written something better than “we need the warblers to team up with new directions so uhhh the school burnt down” like. it’s a private school. if the school is gone and they’re just staying at mckinley what are the parents paying for? they’re just cool with sending their kids off to public school now? every adult in this universe has been murdered by these kids, haven’t they? they’re just doing whatever they want jfc

- a wedding was a good episode. ish. and yknow, huge kudos to them because gay marriage wasn’t legal in the us at the time so im less harsh on the fact that they definitely threw up the rainbow flags and made it less about the characters getting married and more so “we have gay characters and look they’re getting married what a concept” but i do wish we could have gotten some more married!klaine since they don’t really have much to do after this understandably but a little moment alone together after the wedding would have been nice :) IT WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE IM TELLING YOU

- get rid of the hummelberry friendship and send mercedes to new york instead. i have nothing else to add to this other than the fact that i mourn the fact that kurt and mercedes went from bffs to just. school mates. this is tragic this is traaaaagic !! and all for more of the rachel berry show smh

- every day i wonder what was going through carmen tibideaux mind when she watched the kurt hummel preform not the boy next door and was like :) and then watched rachel berry have a breakdown on stage and then proceeded to give rachel the spot at nyada and kurt gets payed literal dust. and THEN she had the nerve to tell him it was because his performance had no heart. AND HOW DID ADAM GET IN THIS BABY GOT BACK MOTHERFUCKER?! nyada is a circus school oh my god !!!!! kurt deserved better im telling yall he deserved so much better

there’s so much more i could rant about but im going insane im so tired and i need psychological help after watching glee so im gonna leave it here and say peace out homies it’s been fun but i need to sleep so bad

#this is insanity #how did this happen #glee #tw hate crime mention #tw suicide mention #tw mental health mention #this was from my drafts lmao

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fuckingthefictional · 4 years

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Secret Shelby.

Finn Shelby x Reader

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Holidays or happy-whatever-you-may-celebrate.

Here’s a crap fic that’s way too long, and half of it is probably gibberish- but hey enjoy!

“Where the fuck is Finn?”

The clock ticked teasingly- it made Arthur more annoyed. By waiting around they were losing time that could be spent working. Or more importantly, getting drunk.

The air was thick with tension. And all of the Shelby’s and the rest of the Blinders were growing increasingly impatient with the youngest brother. He had yet to make an appearance and it frustrated the eldest Shelby to no end.

If there was one thing that the Shelby family expected with the business they owned, it was to be on time- everyone knew that the Shelby’s hated tardiness and the fact that Finn hadn’t shown up was pushing them all into a state of annoyance.

“I said where the fuck is Finn?” Arthur asked again, not particularly asking anyone directly.

“I’ve not seen ‘im.” Isaiah replied from the column he was leant on.

Tommy took an inhale of his cigarette and swilled the whiskey around the glass it was contained in.

“If Isaiah doesn’t know Arthur, then I have no fuckin’ clue. If you’re that bothered about the lad then go and find him.” Smoke blew from his mouth, “Until then, we’re going to talk business like real businessmen.”

—

That same morning on the other side of Small Heath, Finn Shelby was tucked up in bed. His arms wrapped around his loves small frame.

You were still fast asleep-you were tired what from being up most of the night in discomfort.

Finn, however, found himself marveling at his girl’s belly, the skin was stretched taut over the swollen bump. It cradled the baby that had yet to be born.

The young Shelby rubbed a circle into the skin with a rough hand across the top of the bump. The movement obviously had caught the attention of his unborn child because soon after he could feel the small jolts and jabs against his palm.

The action brought a smile to his face but subsequently caused you to groan and hiss in pain.

He’d forgotten how sensitive your belly had become in the weeks leading up to delivery. The doctors had said, that because of your small, adolescent frame- it gave the baby less room to move around comfortably.

Finn knew you’d do anything for your baby to be comfy and safe within your body though, so you had proclaimed that if it meant a few days of discomfort and pain then so be it.

“You okay?” Finn mumbled into your messy hair, “do you need anything love?”

You had to smile at his offer. Ever since you’d become pregnant, Finn had been home a lot more. You hadn’t expected it (not that you weren’t thankful and grateful for it), you knew how much family meant to him- how much the business meant to him. How much proving himself to his brothers meant to him.

When you brought it up with him though, he just claimed that “You’re my family now. You and our little bean.”

“Love?”

You were brought out of your thoughts to see Finn looking worried.

You caressed his cheek, “just hold us.”

He slowly pressed a long kiss to your hairline and then proceeded to wrap his arms around as much of your waist as he could reach.

“What do you think they’ll look like?”

The thought caused you to smile softly, “I hope he looks just like you. With your curly red hair and freckles.”

Finn chuckled into the crook between your shoulder and neck, “so it’s a he huh?” I stroked the bump lovingly, “I think it’s going to be a little girl- a spitting image of her mother.”

The idea of the baby being here made you both sick with nerves but also full of joy and excitement.

Pregnancy was a new concept for both of you, especially considering you were both only 17.

But you were so glad that Finn had stuck with you for the duration of your pregnancy.

He never missed an appointment and constantly talked to the small baby that grew inside of you. He’d even tried to take up knitting, Finn had managed to make a scruffy looking bobble hat for when the baby arrived. It looked crap- but you appreciated it all the same.

Children, however, were a different story. Finn had obviously been in charge of looking after his nieces and nephews in the time when his brothers were abroad fighting.

And he still occasionally did it whenever Esme or John needed a spare hand.

And you were known to babysit and tutor children around Small Heath. You were one of the few genuinely liked people in town.

You weren’t judgemental and were willing to help others- and as much as the Small Heath inhabitants didn’t want to admit they were thankful.

The idea of your own bundle of joy was different. You’d both held and cared for babies that belonged to someone else- and the idea that this child growing inside of you was your responsibility made you anxious.

But you and Finn and soon the baby had each other and that was all that mattered.

“Mum?” The soft knock from the entryway of the office caused Polly to look up from the books she had been poured over minutes previously.

Micheal walked in and took a seat in front of his mother.

“What’s the matter, sweetheart?”

Micheal frowned slightly, he didn’t know whether he was reading too much into this.

“I’m worried about Finn.” His face conveyed serious stature though as his mother looked up at him from behind thick lashes.

“And why is that?”

“Because I haven’t seen him in days.” He licked his lips, “He hasn’t been at the betting den, or the garrison, his apartment is empty every time I check. For fuck's sake he hasn’t even shown his face at the family meetings.”

Micheal shifted in his seat, “Him not showing up to family meetings is not normal. When has Finn ever missed out on a chance to prove himself?”

Polly stubbed out her cigarette into the ashtray, she looked as if she were thinking hard for a solution.

“I’ll bring it up with Tommy, truth be told I’m worried too. Finn has never been gone this long without calling, writing or even just visiting.” Her hand brushed some stray hairs out of her face, “I agree, it’s not like him.”

You didn’t understand how you had grown so big in the last week. You knew you were entering your 38th week and that you were coming into the area of potential delivery dates.

Finn had put you in bed rest and was adamant that it would stay that way until the baby arrived.

Some of the ladies from around town had been keeping you company, their children presenting you with hand-me-downs from when they themselves had been babes.

Staying in bed was nice for the first day or so- but then your pregnancy hormones kicked in and you couldn’t help but feel smothered and miss the absence of using your muscles.

You hated bed rest- but you knew it soothed Finn knowing that his two loves were tucked up and safe in bed.

You knew Finn had been avoiding his family like the plague, he still did jobs that paid the bills and kept money coming in. But whenever he saw his brothers- he’d only speak a few sentences around them.

He’d gotten a right bollocking from Tommy, saying that he needed to prioritize his family over whatever he had been so occupied with.

So that’s what he did, he focused on his new family. He still spoke to his Aunt Poll and occasionally Micheal and Isaiah.

But you were beginning to get frustrated with your boyfriend. You knew that his absence in the Shelby family was hurting them, and doing more harm than good.

It hurt Finn as well as much as he didn’t want to admit. These were the brothers that practically raised him. The boys that taught him everything he knew. The boys that shaped him into the person he was now.

And that had been why you’d persuaded him to go out to the Garrison for the evening- just him and his family (plus Isaiah).

At the time you’d thought it was a great idea, you just forgot one detail. You were heavily pregnant and due anytime soon.

And of course, the baby chose the only time that their father was out to try and make an appearance.

—

Finn walked into the pub, the smoky air and rowdiness of the patrons made Finn feel at home.

Considering he had been coming to the Garrison since he was a young lad, he had become used to the behaviour from the drinkers that spent their time in the pub.

He shouldered the door to the private room, and there sat his brothers, cousin, and Isaiah.

“Oi, Oi who’s this?” John’s cocky voice chirped from the corner of the booth.

“I don’t know mate,” Arthur shot back, “looks like a stranger to me.”

“Shut up.” Finn grumbled back, rolling his eyes.

Finn sat down next to Isaiah, who in turn passed over a cigarette.

The next hour was spent playing cards, they were all completely aware of how uncomfortable the youngest Shelby was. Finn kept looking towards the door, tapping his foot anxiously.

Tommy finally spoke up, “Where’ve you been then, aye Finn?”

“Y’know out and about.”

Tommy and Arthur shared a look, “You know that’s not what I meant Finn.”

Finn was glaring at his older brothers now, he knew that they wouldn’t give up until they had every piece of information.

That was until Harry knocked on the hatch and claimed that there was a phone call for Finn

He abruptly rose from his seat and slammed the door upon exiting.

He picked up the receiver that the barman was holding for him.

“Hello?”

“Finn!”

“Y/N- what’s wrong?”

There was a pause and he could hear your harsh pants through the line.

“Y/N/N?”

“The baby-“ there was more wincing from your end, “The baby is coming.”

“Shit.”

“Just get fucking home now! For fuck sake.”

With a last few reassurances, he put the phone back onto the holder. Finn turned only to see a small crowd comprised of his older brothers.

Finn started to push past them but was stopped by hands on his shoulders.

“I need to go.”

“Not until you tell us where you’re going.”

He was starting to get angry, “For fuck's sake Tommy- let me go!” He broke free and started to break into a sprint.

His lungs were on fire and his legs burnt but Finn continued the pace all the way back to where his girl was waiting.

What he failed to notice was his brothers tailing him in the family car.

—

You were hunched over panting harshly, grasping onto the mattress with white knuckles.

You knew labour was bad- but you didn’t expect it to be this bad. The rippling pain was intense and you hadn’t expected the process to be this quick.

The ladies at the hospital had said that a first-time labour would be a slow process- evidently, that wasn’t the case.

“Come on baby, work with me- at least wait for yer father, yeah?” You mumbled to the empty room.

Another contraction struck your body causing you to yell out in pain.

“Y/N/N?”

It was Finn.

“Bedroom!” Was the only reply you could muster.

A few seconds later your boyfriend rushed into the room, he immediately knelt down to your level and slowly kneaded the bottom of you back.

You let out a few more groans- your belly felt tight. It was almost as if the contractions were seizing your entire body and you could feel a harsh pressure urging you to push.

You found yourself grasping Finn’s shoulder, “I need you to check...I can feel something.”

Finn just gawked at you, speechless. However seeing you in pain, he did as he was told.

And low and behold there was what looked like the top of a head.

“Baby’s coming now, love.”

You grunted in response, as he helped you up onto the stripped mattress.

And then the door flew off of its hinges, and in strolled the Shelby brothers.

Finn seemed to be in as much shock as you were.

His shouts of anger rang out, as you groaned again and again.

At this point you were in a lot of pain and all you wanted was privacy and rest. And to have this fucking child out of your body.

“Did you invite the entirety of fucking Birmingham to witness this!” You screamed, hands finding their way to the metal bed frame which was situated behind you. The men just stared on- seemingly speechless.

“GET OUT!”

They scarpered from the room, saying something about “fetching Aunt Pol”

You didn’t care anymore, you’d given up trying to be rational and following the instructions that had been given at the hospital to you months prior.

If your body wanted to push, then you’d bloody well listen.

Finn had placed warm water, towels and a blanket on the bedside table. He then proceeded to climb behind you and press soft kisses to your sweaty brow.

“Finn I need to push.” You announced, “this baby isn’t waiting for anyone else.”

You could feel him nod behind you, “what can I do to help?”

The words would have been sweet if you weren’t too busy pushing a human out of you.

“Hold my knees back.”

He complied, and you felt your knees raise up to your chest.

And then- you began to push.

It felt like an eternity, but then you felt a release and heard it. You heard a high pitched scream, and a kick to your thighs.

The baby was here.

You looked up at Finn, who was teary-eyed and slowly reached down where your hands met the small body of your daughter.

By the time you sat back up with the baby cradled in your arms, Finn had a pair of scissors in his hand, he cut the cord and then began to clean the baby with the towel that was previously laid out.

You reached for the soft blanket that had belonged to Finn as a baby and wrapped the newborn up carefully.

“She’s perfect.”

You nodded in agreement, “she has your nose.” You smiled widely and stroked the small baby’s nose gently. The action caused the baby’s face to scrunch up- which in turn caused the young parents to laugh and smile in awe.

Finn softly kissed your temple and whispered sweet nothings to you, as you just leant back into his embrace.

The birth was finally catching up with you. You were so tired, and you soon felt yourself drift off into a deep slumber.

Finn took the baby into his arms and gently lifted her down into the bassinet, she mewled in protest to being put down.

The thought made him smile, the fact that his baby was already attached to his parents.

He proceeded to lift the sheets and blankets over your body, giving you warmth while you slept.

Finn then once again enveloped his baby girl into his arms, as he held her up against his chest.

He didn’t know he could be so capable of loving someone like this.

The quiet bliss was soon broken as Polly and Ada burst into the room each of their arms held bags.

“Aunt Pol?”

“What’s the bloody hell is going on?” Polly ranted on, “Your brothers said-“ The older woman stopped mid-sentence as the baby let out a little squeak. Almost as if she were announcing her presence.

“Aunt Pol, Ada- I’d like you to meet the newest member of the Shelby family. this is Theiadora Elizabeth Shelby. Theia for short.”

Polly looked close to tears and the younger of the two women gasped.

“You named ‘er after mum?”

Finn nodded in response.

“And this,” he motioned to your sleeping figure, “is my girl, Y/N.”

Finn just looked towards the two most important people in the world. He softly stroked his child’s face as he bent down to kiss her face.

“Welcome to the Shelby family, Theia.”

—

It was a few days later, both you and the baby were doing good. Finn barely put Theia down, it was evident that even at a few days old- she was a complete daddy’s girl.

Which you found completely unfair considering what your body had put up with for her to even be here.

But you soon got over the minor bitterness that you had felt ,when you woke up to the sight of your boyfriend cradling Theia’s small body and vowing to always protect her.

You’d gotten close to the Shelby ladies in the past few days too. Polly brought fresh food round every few mornings and usually stayed for a cup of tea if Finn was around.

And then there was the Shelby sister, though you had only known Ada for a few days, she’d become your biggest supports next to Finn.

She’d try and come over everyday, bringing her son, Karl with her.

You were thankful for her presence and she made you feel reassured, like you actually knew what you were doing.

Finn had told you that it was because Ada had been in the same boat as you, that she too had been a young mum.

But you knew it was only a matter of time until you were officially introduced to the Shelby family. So when Ada turned up to you and Finns home, you were understandably taken by surprise.

“Ada, is this really necessary?” You asked as you cradled the small baby in your arms. Theia was snoozing and even at a few days old she produced little snores like her father did.

Ada just continued to pin back your hair, “Yes, you have to meet my brothers. So does little Theia.” She paused, sensing your uneasiness, “It’ll go smoothly Y/N, Finn would never put you or Thee into harms way.”

Her words soothed your queries about this introduction. She was right. Finn had promised to protect you both from harm.

And you knew he wasn’t one to break a promise.

—

Finn had already gone to Polly’s house to help set up for dinner- as he knew that the others wouldn’t.

It also gave him time to explain to Polly about why he had kept his girls a secret (Which she had been quite furious about.)

“Why didn’t you tell me? This family does not keep secrets.”

Finn didn’t have an answer to that, he just shrugged.

“How long have you been together”

“Nearly two years.”

The questions kept coming

“Where did you meet?”

“She was tutoring Katie with Maths, I walked into the kitchen and found ‘em doin’ algebra.”

This went on for some time, until Polly finally asked.

“Do you love her?”

“More than anything.”

The sweet conversation was interrupted by the boisterous banter between his older brothers.

John grinned at him, seemingly proud that he finally knew the secret that his younger brother had been keeping to himself.

“How’s fatherhood treating you, Aye Finn?”

Polly smacked her nephew around the head, “Mother and baby are healthy- If you must know.”

“And what are their names?” Tommy’s cool, calculating voice queried from the stairwell.

“The-“

“Theia Elizabeth Shelby.” A female voice beat Finn to the answer. Looking up he saw you holding the baby in your arms, Ada and Karl next to you. “And I’m Y/N Y/L/N.”

You walked over to where Finn was situated and he wrapped his arms around your middle. The tiny baby in your arms was snoozing, and like her father when asleep, had no intention of waking up for a while.

The other Shelby’s looked on as Finn doted on his girls, making sure that they had made the trip safely and asking about other minor details that Tommy, John and Arthur would never have thought to ask their ladies.

“You look familiar.”

You looked over to see who had spoken, John sat on one of the rickety kitchen chairs, starring inquisitively at you.

“Where’ve I seen you before?”

Ada smacked her brother across the back of his head, this caused a yelp to arise from the man.

“‘the fuck was that for?”

Ada just rolled her eyes, “She’s not from a whorehouse if that’s what you’re thinking John.”

The comment didn’t go unnoticed by Finn, who’s face had flushed in anger at the idea of John possibly trying to call the mother of his child a whore.

You laid a hand on his shoulder, “I used to tutor some of your children. Help ‘em with school work or any stuff they may have missed out on.”

Tommy spoke up from his spot in the kitchen, “so you’re a teacher, aye?”

You blinked, “No, I just tutor and occasionally look after children from around the area.”

“Is it good pay?”

You were once again taken aback, “Pardon?”

Tommy repeated himself, “I said is it good pay?”

You couldn’t quite see what the outcome of this conversation was, but you could see the cogs moving in his head.

You cleared your throat, “I don’t get paid Mr Shelby, I do it all voluntarily.” You stared at him blankly, “A lot of the families around Small Heath don’t have the money to pay me for what I do. Besides I’ve always said that support from others shouldn’t come at a price.”

Polly and Ada nodded approvingly, while Finn just looked at you with adoration.

“‘ow old are you then.” John popped up this time.

“I’m-“

“She’s 17, seven months younger than me.” Finn quipped, curling a few strands of your hair around his fingers.

“And how long ‘ave you been with our Finn?”

“Just over two years.” You answered the questions.

“Where’d you grow up, I don’t recall seeing you around Small Heath?”

“I-“

“Bloody Hell boys,” Ada huffed as she set Karl down on the small armchair in the corner of the room, “What is this? An interrogation?”

You shot Ada a thankful look, the questions were beginning to make you feel slightly overwhelmed and out of your depth.

The slumbering babe in your arms began to squirm around, as she started to awaken. Theia let out a small series of yawns, before her face scrunched up and her eyes slowly opened.

The whole room fell into a hushed silence as they watched in awe.

“She has your eyes Finn, lad.” Arthur spoke from his position by the mantle.

“Yeah, she’s pretty perfect.” He replied.

Tommy stepped forwards glass of gin in his grasp, “Aye well let’s say a toast to the newest Shelby!”

They all raised a glass and together chanted in tandem, “to the newest Shelby.”

You looked up to the Shelby you had fallen in love with all those years ago- he pressed a kiss to your lips.

Life felt good- life was good.

#peaky blinder headcanon #peaky blinder imagine #peaky blinder fanfic #peaky blinders #peakyblinders #finn shelby #finnshelby #finn shelby x reader #pregnant!reader

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aw-tryagain · 5 years

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Wow

People really don’t like hearing the truth about what they do and it shows. How can y’all misinterpret what I was saying THAT badly??

Like this was just my final straw I am done with the fandom. Y’all are all so damn ignorant and petty. Y’all will literally hate on someone for doing what you do! How does that make sense?! I’m just tired of y’all and have been for such a long time now and have been less and less involved in this fandom as time went on because I too began to notice things about how yall act and treat each other and yes y’all really are all so fake and after this whole shit show I just can’t do it anymore. Lol like I knew twilight was shitty but there were still a lot of things I loved about the series and I saw so much potential in it and I recognized the shitty parts and also tried to change them to make it better and that’s what a lot of people or pretty much everyone does in this fandom, but y’all just don’t recognize the shitty parts. Y’all try to excuse it. Especially when it comes to the main characters. Y’all will literally jump through hoops to excuse or just flat out ignore Alices racism and how she treats Bella. Y’all will excuse/flat out ignore Edwards fucked up abusive actions towards Bella yet will turn around and vilify Jacob for kissing her without her permission and guilt tripping/manipulating her too. Yall vehemently hate the shit out of Jacob (and are sometimes really racist about it) and will make posts/headcnons/au’s of the cullens beating him up a native brown boy for basically doing to Bella what they literally do to her through the entire series, take away her bodily autonomy and choices and manipulate her. Yall make posts about old white racist people literally beating up a 16 year old Native American boy and jack off to that shit and be racist all while y’alls precious whites can do anything they want to Bella because nothing the Cullens ever do is wrong. Y’all are literally playing right into the hands of that racist author SM and what she wanted and what she pushed so hard in the series you’d have to be blind not to see.. and you don’t see it.

Y’all still perpetuate the bs Meyer pushed and are all so ignorant because Jacob wasn’t like that at first and was never supposed to be like that. Meyer ruins every character she touches ESPECIALLY when it comes to poc but instead of looking at that y’all would rather act like assholes and treat people who like these characters and want to remake them in their own image like shit. Yet you all want people to stop calling you racist for loving and excusing Jaspers time in the confederacy and let you all redeem him and his actions. There was a whole fandom fight about this exact thing when someone called out the racist shit these people were doing regarding Jacob and the Cullens and guess what y’all did? Y’all tried to not only defend what y’all were doing but also tried to defend the fact that Jasper was a literal confederate soldier. Like, Jasper was one of my favorite characters but that doesn’t excuse what he was. You people are the most hypocritical people I’ve ever met. Y’all can make excuses for Jasper being a confederate and say “oh well he learned from that! He’s not a racist!” and y’all can make headcanons trying to redeem him but don’t seem to wanna redeem him from the problematic things he does in the series to this day which y’all seem to always leave out and forget. Y’all can say “oh Meyers and idiot! She didn’t know what she was doing! Jasper should have been a union soldier!” and all types of shit but nobody can do the same for Jacob who was actually fucked over by Meyer and made to do problematic things not only because he was the rival but also because Meyer loves making poc the villains all the time? How can y’all not see that?

Y’all make excuses up the wall for the precious Cullens fucked up actions and will gladly blame the author and not the character for it and will attack anyone who thinks otherwise but when it comes to anyone else? especially poc? It’s time to hate them and treat them and anyone who likes them and tries to actually redeem them from their racist biased author, like shit. It’s funny how we’re supposed to love the confederate soldier who willingly fought for slavery and quickly rose through the ranks in the army and seems proud of that fact when recalling it in Eclipse and he’s just so smart and practical and calculative and is such a great leader and thinks things through and is able to convince others easily and get them to follow him because he’s so charming but we’re also supposed to feel bad for him and hate the Mexican woman who “manipulated” him and lied to him and of course she’s painted as some kind of evil seductress who manipulates the poor defenseless mindless white man that we all must coddle. I italicized those words bc that is supposed to be his characterization. People who are calculative and smart and good leaders aren’t so easily manipulated and aren’t so easily trusting, and don’t fall for one obvious lie for 100 years! Idc what anyone says nobody can keep up a simple ass lie for that long especially when with just a little more thought put into it, the lie can be debunked so easily bc the truth is right there. Also in the end he had the power. He could do what he wanted with his own body and he chose to do what he did. We’re not gonna blame the woman for the actions of the man. Yes she had a part in it and influencing it but there is no way he couldn’t have felt the deception and do nothing about it or at least feel some type of way about it. If he’s so strong and powerful and dangerous and controlled all those newborns and is so much stronger and better than María why didn’t he stage an uprising or something? Don’t give me that “he didn’t know what he was doing” excuse. It’s the same tired ass excuse y’all use for him being apart of the confederation and it makes no sense. He was able to think for himself (and apparently has a strong smart vampire brain) and do for himself and literally had power over himself and others. This is literally me saying that the shit doesn’t add up from what we know from canon. It doesn’t make sense and I’m calling out the plot holes and why it doesn’t make any sense and why it should be taken with a grain of salt. Because it’s bullshit.

This is NOT me saying “men can’t be abused” or some other shit y’all want to put into my mouth. Like you guys do all the time. But of course he didn’t actively choose to make any of those decisions and act upon it on his own, no it’s all the woman (Maria’s) fault for every single thing he did. He was completely mindless and stupid and didn’t stop to think about anything once. I am in NO way saying that María wasn’t wrong for the lie that she told him or the manipulation or whatever it’s definitely wrong but it’s also unfair that she is the only being hated for it when the main characters do the same shit?! Yet everyone ignores it because it’s not abuse when they lie and manipulate. It’s unfair that people who like her and see the error in the way she was created and want to change that or whatever and ship her with Jasper get hate for it yet you guys can do the exact same thing with your faves and their issues? THATS WHAT IM CALLING OUT! I’m not mad bc y’all “don’t ship abuse” I’m mad because you’re all hypocrites and you all fail to see it. It’s said that she did lie and manipulation and it’s “implied” as abuse and people take that little bit of info and run with it (like they do a lot) and make it out like María is the worst person ever to walk the earth and was lying to him constantly about every little thing ever and was sexually abusing him and was physically beating him even tho NONE of this is EVER stated in canon. Y’all vilify the shit out of her (the hate gets so bad I’ve seen people literally act like she’s dirty and impure and beneath compared to the special white savior and all bc she’s the manipulative colored rival and that’s ANOTHER place where the racist undertones come to play.) bc Meyer painted them as this turbulent problematic relationship with the bad colored promiscuous sexually deviant woman and then Jasper finds a pure white woman and they have the bestest, healthiest relationship ever. They don’t tho. Alice lies to him too. Alice lies to him a lot in the saga and actively keeps things from him. Alice talks down to him and teams up with Edward and is on his side all the time to treat him like a child and basically act like he’ll never be as good as them when it comes to bloodlust (Edward legit says this shit about him but yeah this family is sooo loving and they believe in him soo much blow me.) She kicks him and stomps on his foot when he has thoughts or does something that isn’t ~Cullen like~ and that’s okay? That’s supportive? Jasper himself manipulates her emotions without her permission and tells her to not worry about important people that are supposed to be “family” and manhandles her when she had that vision and this is supposed to be so much better? This is supposed to be one of the best relationships in the saga because ~mates~ and tru wuv?! Their whole courtship and mating doesn’t even make a lick of sense why would he go into a diner? full of people? Especially if he was hungry?! That doesn’t make sense! How could she have possibly had a vision of him? and then automatically assumed she was supposed to be his ~mate~ that makes even less sense, and they’re incompatible and are pretty scummy to each other but it’s disguised as pure mated mystical love, by Meyer.

We’re supposed to like it and it’s supposed to be great but it’s not and I don’t because I see holes and I’m not falling for Meyers bullshit excuses to cover her own ass; we know Meyer has a problem with showing vs. telling but we also know she has a problem with making things that are supposed to be good look terrible. but his relationship with the big bad Mexican is the one that’s completely wrong and supposed to be feared? He has more in common with said Mexican woman and pretty much acts just like her! He went along with her and what she wanted and didn’t stop and think about what the fuck he was doing and he’s known to do this in canon because he literally said that he did the same thing with Alice. He was made to feel powerful and capable even if what he was doing wasn’t morally sound. Also omg over time they eventually began to have some real feelings for each other from their little relationship they had on the side or whatever and to this day they’re still friends with each other and Jasper thinks about her from time to time and wishes her well. They actually GREW to be friends and actually had some kind of development and progress in their relationship. Their okay with each other now even with their turbulent past and Jasper doesn’t hate her. Like at all and you mean to tell me that’s bad? It’s just horribly abusive and people have no right to ship it or even like it and/or indulge in it because they may see some potential with what Meyer did with them and want to build on that and improve it??? We ALL know Meyer creates a lot of things, characters, plot points with soo much potential but always ruins it and people in fandom see that and want to change it and love it and bring out that potential but when it comes to certain characters and ships (mainly involving poc) that’s off limits? Yet y’all do the same thing with yalls boring ass white canon characters and ships or just ignore the ships/characters issues in general??? But feel like y’all got the right to play god and be all high and mighty and holier than thou and viciously attack people for doing what y’all want to do??

Now That’s a fucking joke.

Not only is it a joke it’s also unfair. Who tf are y’all to dictate what someone can and can’t like/indulge in??? and I love how everyone wants to claim “oh I don’t ship Edward/Bella Jasper/Alice etc... bullshit! All y’all do is talk about them and make headcanons and au’s and shit that’s what this fandom mostly consists of, quit fucking backtracking and lying. This doesn’t even begin to explain all things wrong with this hypocritical ass fandom but this rant is more so related to what just happened that was my last straw and made me leave that ignorant ass shitshow of a fandom.

You people read that whole passage that I wrote calling out unfair treatment and fucked up behavior and you STILL just watered it down to “oh they’re just mad because we don’t ship abuse” YES YALL DO! and that’s the problem!!! You guys HATE it when people talk shit about y’all and look down on y’all for liking twilight and tell y’all not to like it bc it’s riddled with abuse and manipulation regarding the main characters and you all come up with your own excuses and reasons (however valid or not they may be) for still liking and indulging in it and trying to fix. Yet you turn around and do the same thing to your own people in the fandom who only ask for/want the same thing y’all ask/want from twi-haters? I was calling out y’all hypocritical actions that is sometimes rooted in racism and how it’s fucked up! I was also calling out how y’all vehemently disrespected, mocked and attacked a real life human person and egged on the op for childishly being a dick to someone for no reason and you all made fun of them for VERY POLITELY requesting something Jasper/Maria related and yet y’all call yourselves nice and accepting? If you didn’t want to do it you could have just kindly told them that you didn’t want to do it. You didn’t have to make a joke moodboard post acting like you’re disgusted (funny how we all must be disgusted with the dirty impure Mexican lol) and the rest of y’all didn’t have to reblog it acting like op was so smart and funny and putting shit in the tags like “why do people ship them lol” “like grow a braincell pls” or “open ur mind” like y’all need to open your minds and realize y’all ain’t shit for that and it WRONG! It was RUDE! Wanna ask “why do people ship them” why do YOU ship shit like Edward/Bella, Jacob/Bella, Jasper/Alice, Victoria/James etc...?? Y’all collectively froth over Victoria and excuse her yet she did. the. exact. same. shit!! Albiet badly, but Come ON! now it’s suddenly okay and excuseable when you throw some white skin on it? Why do YOU even like TWILIGHT if it’s riddled with so much shit?! Racism, sexism, homophobia. If anyone needs to “grow a braincell” it’s y’all. Also yes, let’s attack people and call them dumb and stupid all for what they ship. That’s good. Yet y’all have been attacked your whole lives for liking twilight and can’t seem to make that connection. Once y’all get a little bit of recognition and power y’all wanna act exactly like the people that mistreated y’all to other innocent people that just want to be involved because they think you guys are cool. Y’all are so fucking backwards smh you people suck so fucking hard man.

Fuck the twilight fandom and fuck twilight. Y’all have ruined something I actually used to enjoy by being such nasty hypocritical turds about everything that isn’t white and popular and what you all like. You can’t be different or have different thoughts or unpopular opinions. Though y’all always say that you can, you can’t. The minute you even say anything about the Cullens that yall don’t like or the minute you ship anything that y’all don’t like, or have an opinion on a character or trope that y’all don’t like y’all get to shading and vague posting and mobbing up talking mad shit. You are all so damn fake and I hope and pray y’all get what’s coming to yall for being such nasty disgusting people and yes maybe I did come on a little too strong the first time and should have handled it better and spoken better and been more respectful but after being here for so many years and knowing y’all? That shit wouldn’t have worked. Y’all still would have reacted with viciousness and bullshit and miss the entire point. It’s what y’all constantly do. Look at what y’all do to people who politely ask for something you may not want to do??? If that’s how y’all react to innocent people then imma honestly pray for y’all. I repeat the same energy people give out and I repeated y’all nasty ass energy in my response and if you don’t like it you need to look at yourself and y’all need to stop pointing the fucking finger all the damn time. Grow the fuck up. Also if people really wanna insult me for writing PARAGRAPHS about shit YALL do? Not only is that the dumbest most useless fucking insult I’ve ever seen but it also reflects on y’all because of the simple fact that I have to write paragraphs calling out the shit y’all do and putting it in detail because y’all don’t know how to fucking read and comprehend shit, and YALL STILL MISSED MY POINT!!! That is... just wow. 🤦🏾‍♀️

Imagine being that dumb!

#jasper hale #the twilight saga #twilight #twilight saga #jasper whitlock #twilight renissance #tts #twilight fandom #fandom racism #fandom bullshit #yeah im done here #i cant take so much dumbssery in one place #yall come up with the stupidest conclusions sometimes to save your own ass #so you can continue being delisonal idiotas #im finished with this fandom fuck yall #fuck yall and fuck this

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survivorreelsmagicwithin · 4 years

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Episode 4(SWAP)- “I'm happy if anyone goes but these bitches' mouths are sealed”-Raffy

I prayed for a swap... and now I'm regretting it. Honestly, kind of got tribe swap fucked. There are 4 original tribe members and then... me and Owen ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE FROM OUR ORIGINAL HOUSES. So... the odds are NOT in our favour. Hopefully maybe we link up with Juls and Chips and potentially set ourselves down as a four.. but also maybe that four isn't tight and I can wiggle these hips into a majority somehow. Straight off the jump you can tell that Landen/Matt are probably close. They have the same interests, same age, and both don't shut up so.. I can see it. I've played with Lily in the past and she's lovely. We weren't exactly very close and she got robbed by a twist but.... hopefully we can try and pick up where we left off. Chips is... lacklustre. I know when I hosted him he was a busy man.. so maybe it is different here. I AM ALSO OBSESSED WITH JULS. So hopefully she's just as obsessed with me and we can work together but I do see similarities in our games and she's someone who when I saw cast reveal I instantly knew I wanted to work with. Honestly, I know the odds might be stacked against me but.. I'm gonna work harder than a hooker on a busy night to get everyone here to love me and keep me around. PS: I miss Jacob ALREADY.

heyoooo WE MADE IT TO A SWAP!!! so basically hufflepuff was the last in-tact tribe standing, meaning we had all 5 players remaining while slytherin had 3 and gryff/raven had 4, meaning a swap right now COULD work well in our favor, and it did, except for meeeeeeeee my ENTIRE tribe (with the exception of me) got to STAY on hufflepuff, meaning I am alone but not only am I alone, every other person on new gryffindor still has someone from their original tribe and the split is 3-2-2-1, so no one tribe has a majority that overpowers the tribe as a whole since theres 8 people, but I don't have someone to fall back on as much as they might because they all have someone in a similar situation as them. HOWEVER, I did get swapped onto a tribe with jacob and jules who are two REALLY good friends of mine, I have known jacob for like 5+ years, and jules and I were a final 2 actually jacob's big brother series (sry we voted you out again sammy :c) so i am hoping i can find solace in them and maybe their relationships can also become my relationships? but its still scary to be the only person of your og tribe because just by process of elimination you could be easy pickings, so come tomorrow, as its still the night of the swap and most everyone just went straight to bed, i need to get boots on and work some social magic. But i wanted to make this confessional to give my first impressions of how i feel about my new tribe mates! we'll just go in alphabetical order autumn - she seems really cool, she turned it out in selfie scavenger hunt for her tribe which was awesome and hopefully we as a tribe can winning due in part to her dedication, all i know about her is that she played crossroads with jake p who i know and that she WON i think she's fairly well known in the community and its partially if not mostly for her good gameplay? she strikes me as the quieter but more strategic type, shes not gonna make big huge moves but shes gonna set herself up perfectly to make those undetectable moves that no one really sees and then she gets to the end and you think what did she do?? and then you realize when she blows you out of the water with her utr gameplay, but also who knows dan - DAN!! me and him played ts manhattan beach together, which was... a time, we were not really on the same side i believe we voted together a few times and worked together for the sake of making a move but neither of us were ever in the others inner circle until the back to back rounds where WE WENT OUT!!! i voted with him as the only person to do so when he left at final 7, which i dont think he believed in the moment but has since realized thank goodness, but i wanted him to stay in that game and maybe voting with him even tho it got me 6th right after and us ending on a good note actually was a good thing? what i know about him is, he is SMART, but i think he lets it show a little much, he seems passionate and very into the game and when things dont go his way i think he struggles to see the logic outside of his own, which makes sense the guy is really smart im sure if he believes something is wrong he has a reason to but it can make working with him unless your undyingly loyal to him a piece of work. if my memory serves me correctly i believe i tried to pull some fast ones on him in mb, where i lied and voted differently or maybe blindsided him a few times and then tried to damage control that and it caused distrust when the time came and i WAS being honest. so my gameplan now is if i end up wanting or needing to work with him (the jury is still out on that one as its like 2 minutes into the swap) but if i do work with him i want to be as upfront as possible and i want him on my good side at all times, like i said he's passionate so he has a FIERY side and i dont wanna be on the receiving end of it. joanna - me and joanna played tashirojima together and..... i may have blindsided her a couple times too.. maybe this is a wake up call for me, BUT ANYWAYS, we played together and we're aligned but i was playing the middle and then i chose the other side and she tried to vote me out and then i worked with her again and then i turned on her again and then i made final 3 and then she voted for me.. so now that we're all caught up, she's a good player, she is very smart and extraordinarily strategic AND loyal, but i dont think she takes to dishonesty very well, not personally but just in the game, i think she sees a clear smart and she'll do what she needs to make that move happen and she's fairly good at it from what i've seen and heard. My other point with her as opposed to dan, we played but ended up on different terms, i voted her out and then she voted me to win, so i think we're fairly informed on how the other plays and that could work against me BECAUSE I WAS SO FLIP FLOPPY IN TASHIROJIMA but hopefully i can bandaid it up and say oh i've changed im tired of stressing every vote i just wanna be loyal find a group and play out with the people i trust yadayadayada which i DO maybe not RIGHT NOW but i do!! anyways im getting away from my point, she's smart, i'm smart (kinda?) it will either bring us together or drive us apart its all reliant on how she feels, personally i would like to work with her bc i do want to be loyal but i want to be in a group that is also LOYAL and also WORKS, i dont wanna jump on just ANY ship, i want to be on the BEST ship, the one that's gonna sink LAST, when all the other ships are capsized and fully submerged. so we'll see how that goes nicholas - i do not know nicholas much at all, i haven't heard anything about him before this game nor during this game, he seems really fun and nice though, i appreciated his intro video it was chill, as for how he plays i have no information on that but i think him and jacob worked together or at least got to know each other so maybe i can get some info on him from jacob we shall see...... raffy - similarly to nicholas i do not know the guy unfortunately, i got a tidbit of info from an unnamed dr guest who was not fond of him, not a very good start BUT i am not going to let that influence me, im still going to go in with an open mind when i talk to him tomorrow and hopefully i have a different opinion and he's really cool! but yet again we shall see as for jacob and jules who i mentioned above i wanna touch on them a little bit because the dynamics there are much more complex, 1. jules is my number 1 in this game, i adore them, i love them, i will do anything for them, BUT thats how i played candyland and jacob HOSTED THAT, he knows how we played individually AND TOGETHER, but more importantly, he knows how CLOSE we are, and if you wanna hurt one of us you take the other out, i dont know if he would DO THAT but he might which leads me to my 2nd point... 2. i have voted jacob out of like every game we have played together lol. BUT I NEVER WANT TO !!!! i love jacob, he's wild and polarizing but he's a good friend just a good person all around but when he plays he can be emotional and in tashirojima i made a move against his number 1 and i didnt want it to divide us but it did because he wouldn't talk to me, so when i had planned to wiggle back in with him he didn't allow me to and i had to vote him out for it sadly, and then in 2020 our last game together, he was practically dead in the water and did himself no favors with how he handled situations with sammy so while i would have voted with him if it meant saving him (sorry sammy) that was not on the table so i had to vote him out, and it literally sucks EVERY TIME, because i love jacob but him in games always puts me in those positions and i hate it, and i told myself i dont wanna do him dirty, well i never WANT to do him dirty, but im going to try and actually avoid a situation that puts me between a rock and a hard place one of which being having to vote him out. but yeah so while i trust those 2 there's some things that could come out of the woodwork that may not be good for him but hopefully i can prevent those or get around them. its not very long into this swap so i may be overthinking and being paranoid but aha ha haha .. ha haa. *raven symone voice* YEP! THATS ME! ok anyways i could be very off in this "assessment" if you wanna call it that but i was bored and its 3 am so i wanted to confess, here's to making it to a swap!! WOOOOOO

OWEN AND I ARE FINALLY ON THE SAME TRIBE, YAY!!! I'm really sad that Kevin is now on a different tribe and all alone but hopefully he can work his way into a good alliance or something. That would be a really hard spot to be in. Also when I play these things I'm bad about just talking to a handful of people and not talking at all to others but I am being VERY SOCIAL this came I messaged the people that hadn't messaged me already and I want to keep up a conversation with everyone, I NEED to keep my social game strong and start thinking about endgame.

so the tribes swapped last night and before you ask, YES i was blessed, YES i got the right house. i was sorted onto hufflepuff as i deserve, because we are the best house, and i got 4 pretty cool new people on my tribe. oh i also happened to get 3 other hufflepuffs which is great for me because it means i am in the majority :D that was such a marshmallow move, and now i don't have to worry all too much about going HARD on social play or anything like that i can just sort of chill, remain a UTR threat, make new pals, and stay on the right side of things via being in the hufflepuff majority. i'm also well positioned here i think as i have max and juls in sort of weeb trio, but ruthie/lily/myself had a sort of agreement max would go if puff lost. on top of that jess seems really funny and i think we'll get along, i might have a harder time with chips and owen but we'll see because they seem nice. (just not sure if they're people i'd personally bond close with, but that may just be because they're newer to me! it's all a mystery!) i'm also obviously very tight with juls, i love her a lot and we were close in 2020 and will continue to be close here! she is the definition of the word legend and i would throw my own game away for her, yes i would. i already have and i'll DO IT AGAIN! overall this is a tribe of really strong competitors and i can't wait to keep making marshmallow moves, *badgerin* the gryffindors, and ignoring the ridiculous idol hunt that's probably going on COMPLETELY while i vibe.

I really like my new tribe. It feels like a good, diverse cast of OG tribes. I think I might lean towards aligning with those in Ravenclaw because they will have the numbers with only two. Autumn and I can be those 2. I am so glad to have Autumn with me as well. She will easily help the most out in any challenge. Also, I feel like I can trust Dan, but I am going to hesitate for now.

So this swap was pretty okay? I would have preferred Owen over Joanna hands down, but having 3 people from the OG Ravenclaw is kinda cute. My plan is to really focus on building relationships with the people outside of the OG Ravenclaw, specifically with Kevin and either Jacob or Nicholas. I have played with Autumn before and she gets top 5 without even trying, so she is definitely on my radar of someone to try to get out before the merge. She is a great player and I would prefer to not have to fight against her for a better resume at the end. Also, on top of my idol, I found a risk/reward kind of thing that I will likely only tell Jules about. I want to drive home the point that me, owen, and her are my end game people. I am worried that Jules is close with Jacob irl and in this game because I don't want to risk her spilling the beans. I might think on that plan a little more before I put it into action, but honestly I probably will tell her. The power is only activated if I am willing to lose my vote at a tribal council. Honestly if we lose this comp, I might need my vote just to establish trust with people, so if I'm able to save it until the merge and then lose my vote when I have individual immunity, that would be ideal. Gotta check on the rules for it though.

It’s been a while since I’ve given an update and a lot has happened. I’m not sure if this is a blessing or a curse, but I managed to make it on a tribe with 4 original Hufflepuffs. Insane to say the least. Immedietly I felt very relieved. It’s nice to know that the people I’ve gotten to know and built some level of trust with during the first tribe would continue with me for the tribe swap...but idk. It could be a disadvantage in the long run by people associating our loyalty to one another. But I’m hoping the positive relationships I built with this tribe and in the great hall would take the target off of me if I can make it to merge. The odds of that feel good since I’ve been able to avoid tribal for this long, but I’m scared that the first tribal I attend sends me home. I really do like our new tribe but so far I’ve really only had good thin to say about this cast! People have positive attitudes even in such tough times and literally everyone is hilarious! I find myself laughing often! As far as who I can trust most, at this point it’s Ruthie. She is the only one who is deliberately said that she has my back. And I feel the same way. Hoping no one sees us as a power duo, but we shall see. I also think landen has been fairly honest with me about his opinions of the cast and that he hasn’t played with very many people. Throwback eep to when I told him I only know 2 people in the cast but it’s really 5! Ugh that’s gonna haunt me I can feel it when 3 out of the 5 people I know are now on our tribe. Eep! Any who, I’m really nervous for Kevin and hope he does well! I felt like we got along really well on the original tribes. With him being the only hufflepuff on the other tribe, I’m worried he is the easy target. Got my fingers crossed and hoping for the best.

i do be lying doe.....i do be lyin......

2 minutes later

to leak or not to leak to joanna...that is the question...maybe i wait....i dont want them to think they can vote me!

14 minutes later

lemme take some time to praise the hosts and this game!!!!!!! cause i ain't doin confessionals enough LMAO!!!! wow the level of originality...the level of harry potter inclusion....the idol search... ugh its amazing i LOVE it, yall did an amazing job with putting in harry potter but not like TOO much that people who don't know it might get overwhelmed? also yall are just a joy to talk to in my confessional!!! love this, never been so into a survivor game -- this is literally the first game where i've remembered to idol search EVERY day (well, almost EVERY day but STILL!!!) and idk. im so glad i'm playing this!! idc what placement i get as long as i make it to merge!!! thank you hosts!!

I am kind of disappointed on how things turned out for the challenge. I really didn't want to have to go to tribal especially because I do not think that I have established myself well on this tribe. However, I did a good job on the challenge so I hope I can stay for it. No one has been saying a name. Autumn did mention that one of the J's should leave. I think it should be Jules because she did so bad in the challenge. Well, either way, I'm happy if anyone goes but these bitches' mouths are sealed

Winning feels SO GOOD! I really like my tribe. Everyone has been kind of quiet. Surprisingly even with Owen here I talk to lily more and she is currently my strongest connection in the game. I’m not sure if it is going to stay that way but I kind of hope it does! We’ll see what happens haha

Everything was super quiet and then everything started happening all at once. Now I'm in three different alliance chats and nothing seems super solid. All I've heard if Raffy or Autumn and I'm guess Raffy is going? I don't want to vote anyone out, I like everyone, but I'm not aligned with Raffy and I don't want it to be me, so I'm going where the numbers are going I think.

Entering this tribe swap, I had definite concerns as Jacob and I were in a minority position by default. However, somehow Kevin was in a minority of one, so I capitalized upon that and reached out to him! Granted, he was someone I enjoyed speaking to from the start, so minority position or not, I wanted to align. Secondly, I reached out to Joanna. She and I immediately hit it off, and if the vibes and aura I am getting from her is true, I think she’ll be incredibly loyal and fun as a ally! Dan, Autumn, Raffy, And Jules have all reached out to me as well. Dan is someone I have enjoyed conversations with for sure, but I do not see myself necessarily staying diehard loyal. I actually adored Autumn and I’s conversation, but I have to be wary of them! They are strong in competitions, and I do not want that. It’s pretty humorous that I think removing challenge threats means I’ll be able to win more challenges, because I suck. Jules and Raffy are who I vibe with the least, but I also remember Jules screwing me over in the ETC mini, when she played into the Hive Mind and basically allowed me to be targeted simply for being an outsider. I am not going to target her simply for that reason, I believe in forgiving the past and leaving games behind, but I do not trust her so far. Personality-wise, we get along! I decided to form the 4our alliance of Kevin, Joanna, Jacob, and Myself. I believe this will be a loyal core to what could be a stellar alliance! I suggested Raffy and Autumn, so I am hoping Raffy ends up being the plan, which seems likely. In the future, I would like to target Autumn-Jules-Dan in that order, although I am open to switching the order. I do think I have some level of control strategically and socially over this tribe, but I cannot get cocky! I have to be humble and take the journey one step at a time. Raffy, in a game of social connections, just like our puzzle, you cannot slide by without talking to others. My vote is for you. x nick

Whew! I made it to the tribe swap!! And I'm a Hufflepuff now! My ACTUAL house! Don't have to spy anymore. https://media1.giphy.com/media/LsKyE4J9PGjIc/source.gif

Anyway - the people featured on my original tribe are: Me & Juls Cool. She's already been open with me about who she wanted to vote off from the previous tribe so I think we can work together still. From the previous Ravenclaw tribe: Owen Um... boo? I don't know, honestly. He just NEVER has or ever wanted to work with me or even really speak to me in any ORG we have ever played. I would like for this to change and will try but yeah I don't know. From the previous Slytherin tribe: Jess Yay! I wanted a chance to play a game with her. I hear she's cracked out of her mind almost all of the time in games. I am here for it! I hope I don't ruin our game relationship by saying too much or the wrong thing! From the previous (and still on) Hufflepuff tribe: Lily, Ruthie, Landen, Max Yay to pretty much all of these. The fact that they all self-identified as Hufflepuffs means that they are my people! I want to pal with all of them. Anyway, as far as game stuff goes Jess asks me how I feel about the game and I tell her that it's been alright and that our first vote was someone who asked to go and that we haven't really been playing this game. Then I said I hope we don't go to tribal because I think I like pretty much everyone. https://media0.giphy.com/media/5tlq0pRndGu8U/source.gif

Then I made a huge faux pas... I said that if we went to tribal hopefully someone who was original Hufflepuff would go. And gave no context. So I guess I gave her bullets to have me killed at a future tribal if it's a "anyone but me" situation. Our challenge was not for reward. We had to do a bunch of puzzles. I suck at jigsaw so I decided to do slide puzzles. I have no mouse and apparently not having one slows me down exponentially. I did the worst at my puzzle. Our tribes tied. We won tie breaker because EVERYONE ELSE is good at puzzles! Final topic. Idol hunt. Still a fail. Went to the lake. The selkie would not speak with me. I think we're in love. https://media2.giphy.com/media/oBfiN3ZSuUEdq/source.gif

I guess I will vote Jacob if Autumn wants to lol

hi it’s me nichole.. um. smiles. i don’t really know what to say um.. we won! woohoo! another melodrama victory, i’m hoping everyone likes me as much as i’m thinking because :flushed: yes she has a social game.. yes she’s thriving.. i cant get anything in the castle so that’s cute. only hints but is that shit gonna click? No.

hi!!!! so we lost sadly. i did rly rly good on the maze so im proud of myself. tribal seems to be easy enough as we were deciding between raffy and autumn but then raffy decided to throw my name out so i think he's going unanimously now. ill be getting a vote which is cute but idc. once hes gone i defff want autumn out bc im in an alliance with everyone but her and dan but at least dan pms me a good bit!

HERE'S THE GOSSIP - I'm so happy we swapped! I would've been heartbroken if we lost and I had to vote out another Ravenclaw, so this is best case scenario. On first glance tho i look mega swapfucked.... all three of prior tribe members separated from me? But honestly, I think that puts me in a better position. Not only can I make new connections, but I won't be targeted for being a block of three. PLUS? I LOVE being on a tribe with Juls, Lily, Jess, Ruthie.... I'm truly THRIVING rn!!!!!!!!!!!!! Chips hasn't talked to me much. Max is okay but seems kind of fuckin crackt. And I like Landen a lot so far! So we're in a good spot. And a puzzle??? whew, this was my week xo Praying my Ravenclaw babies are okay, and I'm going to work on building maybe a counter-Hufflepuff alliance with Juls Chips and Jess if we lose!

ok I only have 5 minutes to write this so we will fully get into the tea later but to recap: 1. God gave me Kevin because He knew what was about to come next 2. the kids are all voting Raffy and only Jules had the heart to tell me 3. I too am voting Raffy because I don't have time to be on the bottom of the tribe and I think there's some fuckery going on 4. all HELL is breaking loose in the tribe chat 5. I got caught in a lie so I've already had to start an apology tour 6. I still have a headache lmao There is so much that needs to be said but all I'm gonna say is Raffy giving me a good laugh helps our goodbye be less bitter. He is genuinely great, was really understanding about it all (and me having to think long term instead of being loyal) and I want better for him. I also want better for myself since my own tribe has been usurped from me? but I digress. Raffy needed to pop off cause they lied to him and me the entire day so what did you expect. I have a lot of his mess to clean up now but hey I have time on my hands. Long live Raffy I will try to do right by you

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