#im prepared to fist fight anyone that says otherwise

[irregulardiaryposts]

16:35 01/03/2021

so. its now march!!!!! march is an okay month. but it also means its been a year since corona really kicked off and thats proper weird to think about. it feels like absolutely fuck all has actually changed but yet im a very different person yk. i played minecraft for 10 hrs last week. im addicted to it. this time last year i was kinda sick and we thought i had corona but since testing wasnt really available i just had to stay home ages. it was horrible but to think that was a whole YEAR ago is absolutely fucking wild. 

anyway back to minecraft. i absolutely love it. its such a simple game and you can truly play however you want to. like. if u dont want to bother beating the enderdragon or doing any serious grind stuff, you can literally just fuck about doing whatever you wanna do... u wanna build a little cottage in the woods? yes. u wanna pick lowers and decorate and build cute farms? yes. u wanna explore a vast and expansive world filled with literally endless possibilities and find pets and loot and different biomes and blocks? yes. you wanna mess around with ur friends? yes. u wanna do pvp or multiplayer games? yes. u wanna meet new people? yes. u wanna play by yourself and become exceedingly rich? yes. u wanna do all this and comforted by the melodic tunes and beautiful landscapes? yesssssssss. it literally has something for everyone but people get so pissy about how others play its soooo annoying. like so what if someone wants to go into creative and cheat or they wanna play on peaceful or they have keep inventory on? they are playing the game in the way they enjoy the most, the way that makes them happiest, makes them comforted, allows then to enjoy playing it. coz i bet if everyone was made to play the exact same way and there was no way to customise your experience, it would not be nearly as popular as it is. it probs wouldve died out if people werent enjoying it because they got frustrated by it, or too scared to lose their things to progress in the game, or too anxious to play because its scary and they dont know how to beat things. or if people play solely in creative and they enjoy that the most and wanna try survival, they dont deserve to get made fun of coz they want to ease their way into harder things. or if someone just wants to build or just explore or just tame a million dogs, as long as they are happy they are already enjoying the game to the max, they dont deserve people being like “ if u play without X youll enjoy it more coz thats the way we play it” like fuck off it would be like if a hardcore players was like “play in hardcore or ur stupid” ppl would get mad because thats not the way they want to play it and they wouldnt enjoy it as much or at all as the hardcore player does. and dont even get me started on this whole bedrock vs java bs. this its such a waste of time like??? who benefit from this argument? because its silly java players think they are automatically better than every bedrock player because they have java. 

like obviouslyyyyyy java is better and im sure a lot of bedrock players would rather java, but u cant lie and say that a lot of og players didnt start on bedrock and then upgrade to java, because as kids u cant really afford a proper pc but everyone has an xbox or an ipad lol. like they literally forget that they probably started playing on bedrock too. and its so stupid because yes while bedrock is a little shit in comparison to java, ITS STILL THE SAME FUCKING GAME just be glad were not fucking fortnite players jesus its pathetic. yes this is essentially a minecraft post and what fucking about it. i told u im obsessed with it. 

i should talk about something else. perhaps my crippling procrastination? its absolutely abysmal how shit at school i am now. i get two unconditional offers and suddenly i think i dont need to do a single bit of work (its kinda true tho) i only have three classes and in doing 1 and 1/2 of them. im not even bothering studying for prelims/exams whatever the fuck because im hopeless. theres no point because even if i do end up doing the exam and i fail theres absolutely no consequences because i have 0 shame. ill walk out of an exam i failed with my head held high because i know uni will be so much better - ill only have one subject, one i actually enjoy and want to do work for (only somewhat tho, my procrastination problems still carry through, im actually doing this instead of a 15 min thing for class but whatever) ill have a reduced working day, i can focus on just one subject, ill have other things to work on too like a part time (scary) and car (exciting) and ill get to meet new people that also want to learn spanish and are interested in it too, and i want to make more friends and i want to be more independent (moving out??? hopefully but also scary) 

i cant believe im actually at a point in my life where im actually interested in the future and want to live to see it (lol yeah) like i wonder what 13 yo me would think. even 15 yo me. i wonder how 20 yo me will look back on this. hi me if ur reading. do u have a s/o?? or new friends? how many new experiences have u had? are u comfortable in ur life? struggling ? happy? i hope ur happy coz u deserve to be. i deserve to be. i hope u have a good time reading these. i dont know if ill ever forget about this blog or not. what was i talking about tho. procrastination. its horrible, I hope u get that fixed pls tell me u do. also please tell me u get better at typing.  this has accidently turned into a speaking to ur future self thing. ill stop now. 

im a very good procrastinator. and my ability to actually focus on stuff has been getting comical. idk if its the pandemics fault or mine or schools but is a bloody issue and it needs to get better. i guess its coz i just have absolutely 0 energy do do what i need to or it just absolutely does not interest me to do it and i know theres absolutely no consequences to it looool. 

every now and then theres a day where i feel very unproductive and lazy and it feels like how it used to. a sort of growing annoyance at myself and feeling like a slug. idk some days i feel teleported back to like almost 4 years ago and idk what to do about it. i used to have a coping mechanism (?) where if i felt bad about stuff id just shower, wash my hair and put on new pjs and do something i wanted to do. it kinda put me in a clearer headspace and allowed be to get out of a slump for like 20 mins. u could call it self care or whatever but it genuinely was like washing the bad thoughts away and starting anew (is that the word) like i was able to think more rationally and get back into the semi real world but i was also doing it because i never used to have a proper shower routine, i used to go days without showering or getting out of bed for much and it kinda feels good to have this little reboot thing where i just shower to get me away from straying back there. 

idk. am i articulating well enough. ive written a lot i think. is there any more updates? nothing really apart from my growing disinterest in all things school lmao. anyway until next time i suppose (will probs be either never or like june lol)

#this is horrible rambling #i dont think i make a singular concise point #anyway that doesnt matter because i do what i want #im listening to mincraft music at the moment did i tell u that #i goddamn love this music #it is literally better than the beatles #im prepared to fist fight anyone that says otherwise #maybe not actually i dont think i could be bothered hahahahahahahahahahahahah #march 2021 entry #2021 the year of fun

[katedoesfics]

Lacuna | Chapter 11

To Kahli’s relief, Sam was the only one in the Civil Corps building that evening. Sam looked up excitedly when Kahli entered, and she jumped to her feet, punching a fist into her palm.

“Alright!” she exclaimed. “Let’s kick some ass, shall we?”

Kahli saluted her playfully. “I’m ready. Show me your moves.”

“First thing’s first,” Sam started. “If you wanna be a good fighter, ya gotta learn all about the proper stance. It’s all about balance. You stay in balance, and you already have an edge.” As she spoke, Sam demonstrated, standing with her feet apart, knees bent, and her fists up. She hopped to the left, then to the right, and back and forth. “You can dodge and move all around your enemies without losing a beat! Once you perfect that, I’ll teach you how to throw a couple of good punches. We’ll work in a few kicks, and then get into some real sparring.” She threw a few punches out before her, then kicked her leg around, returning back into her proper stance.

Kahli frowned. “I thought we were gonna play with swords.”

Sam grinned and straightened. “We’ll get there. You gotta learn the basics first.” She pulled her gaze away and hesitated. “And admittedly, I’m not exactly the best swordsman. Don’t get me wrong, I can do what I need to do, but it’s not exactly my forte.” She spoke quickly to reassure Kahli, brightening slightly. “But, ask anyone! Ya gotta know the basics first. And Django is pretty good with a sword. Once you graduate from my lessons, you can get him to show you how to use a sword.”

“Alright,” Kahli said. “I trust ya.”

Sam smiled. “Good. With both of our skills, we’ll make you the best damn fighter Portia has ever seen! You’ll be a Civil Corps officer in no time!”

“Let’s see if I can survive these robots, first,” Kahli said.

Kahli spent the following weeks training with Sam. Spring warmed into summer, and Kahli already noticed herself getting stronger and more agile. And when she wasn’t training with sam, she was gathering materials in the mines and exploring Portia. She began work on the dee-dee transports, and with Emily’s help, she even began construction on a barn, eager to fill her property with cows and sheep - and someday - a horse.

She mostly admired the horses from afar, occasionally coming to the paddock fence to offer them handfuls of grass or apples and carrots. One horse in particular caught her eye; a white mare that often came to her when she sat on the fence to offer her treats.

When the barn was finally ready, she made her way to MaDonald’s to arrange the purchase of two cows and five sheep. She was counting out the gols she had saved as McDonald chatted on about the quality milk his cows produced.

“I’ve noticed you eyeing the horses, too,” he said to Kahli. He grinned at her when she handed him her money. “Ever ridden before?”

Kahli shook her head. “I’ve always wanted to learn. But there weren’t exactly a lot of horses in Barnarock.”

McDonald nodded. “Tell ya what,” he said. “I’ve got a busted barn out there that needs fixing. If you can give me a hand, I’ll give you lessons. And maybe I’ll give ya the friends and family discount on Star over there.”

Kahli looked over her shoulder to the white mare he pointed to.

“She’s a fast one, though,” he warned her. “But I see you’ve both taken to one another. I think I could part with her if she goes to you.”

Kahli met his gaze and smiled. “You got yourself a deal.”

After bringing the two cows back to their new home - and going back for the five sheep - Kahli set to work, spending the rest of the day fixing the barn for McDonald. By the evening, she had finished, and she stepped back to admire her work.

“You don’t mess around,” McDonald said as he approached her. He looked over the barn and nodded in approval. “Well, then, a deal’s a deal, hm? I’m sure you’re pretty busy these days, but I’ll l give you lessons whenever you’d like.”

She did have a pretty full schedule. She had just finished her training with Sam, which she did three nights a week, and she would be training with Django. She spent most of those days working on commissions, and the days in between gathering materials and crafting in the workshop. But she was eager to keep busy. For the first time since she arrived, she didn’t think about her father. She didn’t think about her feelings of abandonment or hopelessness. She didn’t doubt her worth as a builder any longer. For the first time in a long time, she was starting to feel like she had found a purpose. She wasn’t just some girl with nothing in her life. She had friends, she had a social life, and things were starting to feel right in the world.

“I think I can manage two days a week,” Kahli said.

McDonald laughed. “Ambitious. Alright, Kahli; I think I can make that work. I’ll see you tomorrow morning for your first lesson, then.”

Her first lesson with Django was that afternoon, and Kahli met him just outside of the plaza.

“Sam tells me you’re a natural,” Django said. He handed her a wooden practice sword. “She filled me in on what she’s been teaching you. I’d say you’re off to a good start. Itching to be a part of the Civil Corps?”

“Just trying not to get my ass kicked by more bandirats,” Kahli said.

Django laughed. “Well, that’s a good goal to have, too. Never know where they might show up, especially if you’re gonna be ruin diving like you have been. Those places are filled with all kinds of nasties. Good to be prepared. Show me what you know so far.”

Kahli was feeling confident in her skills, but she should have known better than to think she would be able to break through Django’s defenses. It didn’t take long before he had kicked her legs out from under her and she lay groaning on the ground. Django looked over her and grinned.

“Never underestimate your opponent,” he said. He reached an arm out and helped Kahli to her feet, and she dusted herself off.

“But Sam wasn’t wrong,” Django continued. “You’ve got a solid basis under your belt. Throwing a sword into the mix will be a challenge, but I think you’re up for it. Shall we?”

Django showed her how to hold the sword, how to balance with the sword in her hands, and how to swing it around her and at her opponents. She wouldn’t learn it all in a day, but she was eager to practice and learn everything she could. For once, she had something to be proud of, and she wanted to chase that high.

*****

“And then I punched those damn rats! It was totally insane! You missed out, Arlo!”

“You didn’t miss anything,” Remington said.

“You’ve dealt with bandirats before,” Arlo said over his shoulder to Sam.

“Yeah, but these guys weren’t like the others,” Sam said. She patted her horse’s neck as they rode along the coast. “In fact, I’m quite sure they’re similar to the bunch Kahli ran into a while back.”

Arlo glanced over his shoulder. “She’s not trying to take on more of them, is she?”

Sam grinned and waved a hand at him. “Please,” she started. “Those things don’t stand a chance against her. I may have been showing her a thing or two. She’s gotta learn to fend for herself, yanno.”

Arlo sneered at Sam. “You’ve been what?”

Sam rolled her eyes. “Come on, man, don’t be such a nerd. What’s wrong with teaching her to defend herself?”

“It encourages reckless behavior,” Arlo said.

“Right. Because she’s totally reckless.”

“Little bit.”

“She didn’t exactly expect to run into those bandirats,” Sam pointed out. “Besides. Who knows what else she might run into.”

“Nothing unless she goes somewhere she doesn’t belong.”

“Stop being so lame,” Sam said. “Believe it or not, she’s not helpless.” She brightened and stood in her stirrups. “Look. See? What I tell ya! Even Django is helping!”

Arlo followed Sam’s gaze, just barely making out Django and Kahli on top of the hill, swords in hand. They were sparring, and to his surprise, Kahli seemed to be holding her own against Django.

“Are you coming?” Sam called to him

He hadn’t even realized his horse had stopped. Sam and Remington were ahead of him, and they were stopped, watching him expectantly. Arlo kicked his horse forward, catching up to them.

Sam grinned. “Impressed, hm? Afraid she’ll show you up?”

“No,” Arlo said simply. In fact, it only worried him. Bandirats were moving in closer to town. Old robots were coming to life in the ruins. Something wasn’t right; the last few weeks proved that. Their patrols had nearly doubled and they had to fight off more hoards of monsters than usual. The last thing he needed was to have more work for himself. What other trouble could she possibly get into?

*****

The next morning, Kahli found herself at McDonald’s farm. McDonald stood beside a chestnut gelding, and he smiled at Kahli as she approached.

“Ready for your first lesson?” he asked.

“Galloping off into the sunset?” Kahli said with a grin, and McDonald laughed.

“Heavens, no,” he said. “You won’t be doing any galloping until you learn how to saddle the damn thing, first.” He picked up the saddle from the paddock fence and demonstrated to Kahli how to tack the horse.

“You put this blanket on first so the saddle doesn’t give the horse sores. Then you place the saddle like so. Right here, see? The horn goes right at the withers. And the girth comes around here, right behind the legs. You might have to cinch it a couple times to make sure the saddle is secure, otherwise ya gonna fall right under ‘im!”

Kahli watched closely, and when McDonald took it all off to let her try, she did exactly as he told her. When the saddle was secured, McDonald moved to show her how to bridle the horse, and once more, Kahli copied his instructions, taking the bridle off and putting it back onto the horse.

When the horse was tacked up, Kahli mounted the horse, listening and watching as McDonald instructed how to get the horse to move.

“A light tap with your heels here will tell the horse to move forward. You hold the reins in this hand. Yes, just like that. And you move your hand over here to tell the horse to go left, and here to go right. See how the rein touches the horse’s neck? That’s what it responds to.”

Kahli did as she was told, and when she moved the reins, the horse stepped to the left, then to the right. When she tapped with her heels, the horse started to walk forward and a lazy pace.

“Good,” McDonald said. “Now, test your brakes. To get ‘im to stop, you gotta pull back slightly on the reins. Not too hard, now. Good. And release. Always release when you get what you’ve asked for. If you keep pulling back, the horse will back up. Yes, just like that. Careful you don’t keep hitting him with your heels; that tells him to go faster. The key is to have steady hands and steady legs. Signal with your heels only when you want to go faster. Now sit up straight. Shoulders back and look ahead. There ya go.”

Kahli walked the horse around the paddock for a while, turning this way and that, stopping and backing up, quickly getting used to the horse’s movements. She listened when McDonald corrected her posture, straightening in the saddle and making sure to keep her hands steady and her feet from kicking the horse’s sides.

The lessons went on like this for the first couple weeks as she learned to keep her balance in the saddle, and soon, she was trotting circles around the paddock, and then cantering. And when McDonald felt confident in her abilities, he introduced her to Star.

“Really get to know each other first,” he said. “See if you’re a good match in the saddle, too. If you can handle her - she is a bit of a spitfire - I’ll let you buy her.”

Anxious to make the horse her own, Kahli spent as much time as she could at the barn, grooming and feeding Star, then riding around the farm. As sweet as she was on the ground, McDonald was right; she had a mind of her own once Kahli sat in the saddle. And though the horse couldn’t speak to her, Kahli swore she could tell just what the mare was thinking when her ears pinned back and she lurched forward, clearly testing the new rider on her back.

But Kahli found herself enjoying the mare’s spunky personality, and it wasn’t long before the two came to an understanding. Star had become familiar with Kahli as her rider, and though she still didn’t hesitate to give her opinion, she learned to trust in Kahli, becoming more responsive to her rider, and soon, they were bonded to one another.

Kahli had to take on extra commissions, working twice as hard as she had done over the spring, but on a particularly hot, summer day, Kahli found herself counting out her gols to McDonald, finalizing her purchase of Star.

McDonald smiled up at Kahli. “I think you two are a good match,” he said. “I’m glad I didn’t ship her off to someone else. Seems like you were made for one another, hm? She’ll take good care of ya, I know it.”

#lacuna #lacuna11 #mtap #my time at portia #fic #fanfic

[everyman0]

A PALE BLUE GHOST

over on the discord, i announced my decision to make another trip to the Edge to try my luck at finding any kind of clue that could help me make sense of it. patrick gave me a whole lot of lip about not using his fucking mirror and other bullshit, but ill save that for another post. this is a lot more fresh and painful for me.

going back outside was a mistake.

i journeyed the five hours it took to get to the impenetrable black wall of the Edge. my plan was to walk down its length, survey anything unusual, you know. obviously i wouldnt have been able to observe all of it in one day as ive mentioned the area it covers is rather large, but i felt some effort was better than none at all, and i wasnt exactly comfortable with the idea of spending the night this far away from the house. simple enough right? there was nothing out of place on the way out here, so i hardly expected what i saw just as i approached the wall. 

it was jeff. sort of.

when i first saw him, he appeared almost like a reflection of me in the blackness. as i stepped closer to the wall, so did he step forward as well - until eventually seeming to step out of the wall entirely. we stood face to face, a mere foot apart, and i noticed then that his entire being was tinted with a pale blue.

i was terrified. i wanted to run away, but i couldnt make myself do it. so i asked timidly, "what are you doing here?"

jeff seems to come alive then.

"what? you told me to grab some stuff for the video today."

fucking bastard. i was still scared, but somehow i just knew he was mocking me. i frown, reaffirming my stance. i had to ask myself if jeff would even do such a thing to me...and then i figured yeah, probably - ghost or not.

"dont you dare pull that bullshit on me," i said, "those days are long gone." and they were. 

jeff laughs. "don't you miss it? simpler times." he splays his hands out like an offering. "cant be all that bad to pretend, for a little while."

i squint my eyes at him - both of them. these days i dont bother wearing an eyepatch, since the point was for evans comfort to begin with. now it doesnt matter that i have a gaping fucking hole in my head for all to see.

i ball my fists at my sides. "i dont have time to pretend, and i dont have time for this conversation - so lets get to the point. why are you here?"

"to see my old friend again! and to tell you there's always more than meets the eye." jeff then taps a finger underneath his left eye, and a phantom pain throbs in my own empty socket. i try to ignore it. 

"yeah, no shit," i say, and cross my arms. i was losing my patience. "if you're just going to spout vague nonsense at me like every other motherfucker does on a constant basis, i'm sorry to say but i will have to pass. i have more important things to do."

"like stand in front of this wall and bitch? is that what you're doing here?" jeff grins, and tilts his head at me. i just scoff, and deciding i had enough, i begin trying to do what i came to the wall for in the first place and begin walking parallel to it. jeff follows after me.

"im only bitching because here you are to distract me," i say, side-eyeing him, "so if you don't mind, kindly fuck off."

"i do mind, actually. why do you even want to leave? its paradise in here. no need to eat or drink, perfect climate, no irritating neighbors or awkward staredowns at the grocery store- you'd love it!"

i stop in my tracks. i hate that the sound of his voice is enough to get me to actually consider his words. but i do, and then i say:

"you know, for a while there, i did enjoy it. to an extent, anyways. you can only enjoy so much when you are all too aware of every little fucking thing. and maybe i could have handled the ghost thing, right? like you said, no neighbors or weird interactions. but then i saw this wall, and now i feel like a trapped animal - and im not okay with that."

"so if you couldnt see the wall, it'd be fine?"

i shake my head, "i came out here the first time to see if i could leave, and i wouldve kept walking if there was nothing to stop me. maybe i would have returned, after a while, had i done so. maybe not." i shrug, somewhat frustrated at the thought. "a wall is a wall, whether i can see it or not. seeing isnt the problem, the existence of the thing is."

"well yeah, but you can't just leave." jeff says it like its obvious. in hindsight, maybe it was. i could already imagine a few reasons as to why, but i wanted to pry out what jeff seems to think the answer is.

so i ask, "and why is that?"

jeff answers: "because there's...people, out there? like, innocent fuckin people, dude." well duh.

i roll my eyes, "im aware. but what does that have to do with me, exactly? habit is already somewhere else doing god knows what."

jeff looks on blankly. "we don't need two of you out there."

ouch. and unfortunately, on some level i believe it to be true. and the implication that i would intentionally hurt or even kill anyone like habit would...im sadly all too aware of the likelihood, really. it doesnt hurt because i feel bad, it hurts because i dont. however, i wasnt about to let this guy know that.

i say, "it's not like id be very social anyways. at this point, i dont think i could even stomach it."

jeff takes on a darker sort of air about him. "evidently so, based on how you treated evan. do you have your head screwed on straight, dude? because like, holy shit was that hard to watch."

i tense up, and i can feel a spark of anger rising from within me. guess it didnt matter what i tried to hide, jeff knew what weak points to hit.

"i was just trying to protect him." 

"uh huh," he nods, "sorry vinny, but you're not the guardian in this one."

"clearly," i grumble, "but i was fucking trying, okay?" i was trying. jeff thought otherwise.

"yeah, trying to get everyone killed. thanks for that one, by the way. you've been self absorbed, irresponsible, reckless and horrible to everyone around you that isn't the entity playing games with our lives, and you can't keep pretending it's not true! do some soul searching. meditate. i don't care. but you're not leaving any time soon, so you'd better get used to it." jeff jabs me in the chest with a pointed finger.

it didnt take but a moment to process jeffs words, and ultimately, i agree with him. im a terrible fucking person. i just am. but i wasnt going to give jeff the satisfaction of me fessing up to it - because i felt like all of this was beginning to become unproductive bullshit and i wanted to do what i came all the way out here to do dammit.

i go to smack jeffs hand away from me, but i come to find that i simply pass through him like he was air. i felt the jab, though, even if superficially. this confirms my suspicion about the ghost thing, but jeff was different from the ghosts in the town; like being able to talk and acknowledge my existence.

i take a step back, "we'll see about that. who the fuck made this wall, hm? you of all things must know right? since you are apparently a plethora of knowledge of good and evil now. can you do that much for me jeff?"

jeff considers my words before he turns away from me to face the terrible wall, his hands on his hips, and his head craning back to presumably observe the wall's endless climb into the sky above.

"habit designed this gaudy architecture as part of his grand scheme. you probably could have figured that much, eh? but what you wouldnt know is that its been here since the very beginning, before you even arrived at the house." he looks back at me, "come on vin. you should know by now that habit is well prepared...even if this timeline is bonkers. you shouldnt need me to tell you that."

i grumble in annoyance, but consider his words carefully. sure, maybe i didnt need him to tell me habit was a suspect in all this, and maybe i could have figured that out just by doing what i had originally planned with scouting the perimeter of the wall. but...here jeff was, telling me things outright. it was a convenient time saver really, even if he was going about it in a bitchy way. i needed to take advantage of this.

"so, if habit made this cage to keep me in, why shouldnt i try to break out? why shouldnt i try to fight his subjugation?"

"one, because habit has eons of experience over you and you'll likely fuck something up really badly," jeff says, and turns towards me again. "two, you're part of this place now. removing you would shatter a really delicate balance. the house is a place of fluctuation, because there's not enough power to sustain herself. and you're radiating power, dude. would you really just abandon her like that, after all she's done to keep you safe and alive?"

ouch again...ugh. i dont usually feel guilty over a lot of things, but jeffs second point seemed to get to me.

i relent. i cower my head to stare at the ground. "i wouldnt have left her forever."

jeff gives me a disappointed sigh. "go back home, man. she's really worried about you."

i bite my lip and give the slightest of nods. i still want to do what i can to escape, and i hadnt forgotten about why i came to the wall in the first place...but jeff's words had me thinking about my desires for the house. in truth, the house and i have formed a strange sort of...i dunno, friendship? its the closest human word i can think for it. i would talk to her, she would listen. id even clean up her rooms, even though ive observed that she can do it by herself.

i think she may be the only thing in this world that can understand me now.

so i feel like in some weird way, the house cares about me. she has done quite a few favors for me, after all; favors that kept me safer. jeff was right again, and i couldnt shake the wrongness of abandoning the house enough to continue talking my way out of this bind.

it was time to go then. but first, i look back up at jeff.

"what about you?" i ask, my mood seriously taking a nose dive off a cliff. sad and desperate and pathetic and lonely. "you came all this way from wherever, however you did it, to tell me all this...are you going to leave me now too, just like evan?" fuck. "i wouldn't blame you if you did...but i have to admit, it was nice seeing you again."

and truthfully, it was - despite the treatment i received. its fine. i deserved it.

jeff leans in, and i can feel the pity in his eyes as he puts a hand on my shoulder.

"that choice isn't mine to make."

and then he shoves me away from the wall with a force that sends me tumbling across the ground a good few feet. i think it fucked up my shoulder. its fine. deserved that too.

and then i went home.

>>

#evrymn0 #phase??? #everymanhybrid

[onepunchmiss]

OPM s2e5 Live blog

“The Martial Arts Tournament”

Alright I’m back to the regular live blog schedule and theres 2 things before we get started. 1) OH MY GOD DO-S IS THE EPISODE THUMBNAIL WE GET TO SEE ALL THE MONSTERS POPPING UP and 2) DOES THAT MEAN WE’LL SEE ZOMBIEMAN TRAILING MARTIAL GORILLA BECAUSE IF SO I sincerely apologize in advance yall must be aware by now how that’s going to go down on this blog. Anyway, as always I’m watching this from the perspective of someone who is caught up on both the manga and web comic. Los geht’s!

Yup the centipede movement is still creepy as hell. I saw people saying it was cgi last week which I didn’t catch right away, but regardless it’s done so well because it looks unnatural.

EYYYYY ok actually I kind don’t care about Metal Knight. What this episode is actually going to be is me screaming about all the monsters liKE RHINO WRESTLER AND PHOENIX MAN GUYS I LOVE THIS STUPID BIRD SO MUCH HECKING HECK. I’m gonna vomit like him and Do-S PLUS Garou vs Bat PLUS the other S Class heroes (Tatsumaki and Flashy Flash??) I am not physically mentally or emotionally prepared.

Yo this seems to be a trend with the monsters and me, I am evidently never prepared for the garish color schemes they get. Not mad just surprised every time?

hhhhhhhhhhhhh Ok the fight! I’m… I’m gonna try really hard to not pause every 2 seconds because I will inevitably have many words to say and screen grabs to take but that would be more than excessive sooooo ok here I go

Lol I failed immediately. I love that they’re going shot for shot with the fight. I’ve said it before, but I really think Murata captures movement and action sequences so well in the manga that if the anime were to try and deviate, it just wouldn’t be as good (especially with all the flack JC staff has been catching). Also I ADORE Metal Bat’s theme music when his fighting spirit comes out??? It’s so corny and triumphant and bad ass at once it fits him so well?? Ok wait a second I thought that after metal bat hit the manhole cover it ricocheted and came back at Garou what the heck??? That was such a cool move on Bat’s part and demonstrates he’s not just brute force, but tactical too. Why’d they leave that out??OH COME ON THEY DID WHAT THE HELL WHERE IS THIS??

This is actually my least favorite thing about season 2 biggest complaint what the fuck they did my boy dirty here. Oh thank god Zenko is here to quell my anger. Also Bat’s glowing eyes of murderous intent. Look at her. A legend.

Garou: “...haa?” Yup still love his voice actor. Perfection. Also Zenko. Just. Metal Bat and Zenko. Moshi moooshi? Just. This whole thing was almost perfect. So close. The fight felt so short, and it was because they cut out some good stuff. So close to perfection uhg

AH MY STUPID BIRD MAN he sounds exactly like what I wanted him to I’m so glad and HAH the fuckin hand I forgot about that. Side note, Anyone else play Arkham Asylum? The monster association logo looks like Scarecrow’s symbol in that game…. ANYWAY I need to take a moment to appreciate that little Phoenixman chuckle it was hella cute ok

Rh-Rhino Wrestler basically just said “Then Perish”

Oh Fuck

Oh God

Martial Gorilla  

Oh fuck

O H F UK

oh false alarm im ok my heart rate skyrocketed for nix Oh Maiko Plasma!! I love her voice wtf its cute? Phew ok the tournament. Wait that’s not giving me a break either because MAX AND SNEK M A X AND SN EK

I love him and his stupid hair omg. I’m REALLY hoping that the anime branching out and giving other characters more spotlight will help them grow in popularity a bit. Every single character in this series is underrated imo. Even the popular ones like geNOS LOOKIT HIM clapping for his sensei. Genos is baby boy I lov

“Dark Corporeal Fist?” Isn’t Void Fist just easier to say? really now. Oh My God Sourface chanting “I’m ok I’m ok I’m ok” is literally my daily Mood™. Damn look at Bang taking out some frustration I’d hate to be that monster. Me too my dude Smile Man.

WHOA I was NOT expecting that transition!! Heart! Hard! HIT! It’s the Monster Wife!! And She definitely looks more monstrous in color oof those eyes ❤❤

OH FUCK OH GOD WAIT MARTIAL GORILLA AGAIN DAMN IT I WISH I REMEMBERED EXACTLY WHEN Z SHOWS UP MY BLOOD PRESSURE CANT TAKE THIS ofuck ok false alarm again but I’m low key freaking out as they pan through all the monsters because the S Class is so close like we’re about to get Child Emperor, Flashy Flash, Pig God, Drive Knight, Darkshine and so on who got next to no screen time in season 1 its giving me anxiety im so pumped??

OH FUCK GUYS PUREBLOOD OH SHIT FUCK I FORGOT WE SEE HIM THIS EARLY CAUSE HIS DESIGN KEPT CHANGING he looks stupid with his hair behind his ears and his voice is NOT what I imagined and that manga panel redraw I did was way off with the color scheme but I don’t care I have read and re-read that fight countless times this monster just grew on me by default oh no UHG and look at Super S again it looks like they’re going panel for panel here with her and I’m not complaining

They keep hopping to the tournament but I don’t have much to say about it until the shit starts going down….. and like I’m so excited for that Snek and Max moment (you know the one) but until then I’m just so overwhelmed by all the other plotlines happening I don’t have much in the way of comments for it

I lied ok that eye twitch got me. But see then it cuts away too quickly and the episode is over. I get that there’s a lot happening at once but the tournament feels dragged out a bit. It’s different when you read the manga at your own pace but cmonnnnnnnnnnnnn gimme moreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

HAH THANK YOU POST CREDIT STINGER YOU DELIVERED MY WISHES AND ZAKKOS IS SOME WEAK SAUCE.

NEXT WEEK GUYS ITS HAPPENING

Final thoughts. Um. I wish the Garou vs. Metal Bat was a tad longer just for that ONE moment. I’m still heartbroken over it. But otherwise? I’m so excited for next week, I can’t convey my excitement without being excessively obnoxious? this episode was pure hype. There are no buts about it- we are getting the S Class next week. I… think I’m going to leave work at noon to catch the episode right when it airs. I was saving that for an episode with Z but I don’t think I’ll be able to function at work if I stay. At this point every character is a fave and now we’re getting all of them, I feel so overloaded and we haven’t even seen anything yet. I don’t know what to even say about the future of these crap ass live blogs- they have no structure as it stands right now, but like they are going to devolve into just me screaming. Not even real words. just something like keyboard smashing and tears, probably. I’m so sorry, but anyway, as always thanks for reading, see yall next week assuming I survive

#you can tell im mildly freaked out at the end because I'm actually typing like a normal human being #I dont know why I'm like this #genuinely having mild anxiety because im TOO excited #someone help me #spazz with me pls #metal bat #garou #opm #s2e5 #live blogging #one punch man #metal knight #super s #do s #phoenixman #zenko #saitama #genos #lightning max #snek #spoilers #anime #opmiss mumbling

[thecouriersix99]

A Courier’s Journey

Ch.9

Finding the ghouls friend was one thing but sneaking through an entire basement while trying to hide from a whole group of giant invisible mutants was another. Six didn’t know where to start “Do you think we have enough time on the Stealth Boys to find her? “ she whispered to Boone to which he just shrugged in response. She paced back and forth with her fist tucked under her chin and the other on her hip “Okay! So here’s the plan, we use the Stealth Boys and couch throughout the rest of the basement. I know it’s not ideal but it should keep us out of their field of vision enough to sneak by. If we can’t see them then they can’t see us!” She nodded to herself and looked at Boone who look for a second maybe a little impressed but not much.

Activating the Stealth Boys they made there way deeper into the basement. It’s was humid and smelt of burnt flesh. As they crawled through the basement they noticed the sound of large footsteps up ahead, before six could make a wrong step Boone grabbed the back of her vault suit collar and pulled her back. Her butt hit the ground with a slight thud causing the mutant to stop and think right in front of her, she was about to let out a small screech when Boone found her mouth and covered it with his hand muffling it. “Must be hearing things.” Said the mutant on a cracked voice. As he walked away Boone let go of her mouth and they continued down into the very bottom of the basement.

Reaching what final floor they slipped past another guard and headed into the jail cell which is what the last room was called. As they got to the door it appeared to be locked “shit!” Six whispered “What is it?” Boone whispered back from behind her “The door is locked, the guard must have it. We need to knock him out somehow and get it.” They snuck back up and just before she was about to get right in front of the mutant, her Stealth boy deactivated and exposed her “Change of plans!” She shouted as the mutant screamed “Intruder!!” The mutant charged his incinerator but before he could fire she sprung into action and grabbed right onto it using her entire body “Stupid human get off!!” He waved it back and forth and she clung on for dear life “Boone a little help!!” Boone was already aiming at the it but couldn’t get a clear shot. All of a sudden the mutant screamed “Enough!” And slammed Six and his weapon against a wall. Six collapsed onto the floor out cold giving Boone the perfect shot and fired. Boone rushes over to her and checked her pulse “Courier? Can you hear me?” He sighed with relief as he felt her pulse and that she was still breathing. He quickly checked if anything was broken and then took the key from the body of what he knew them as the Nightkin.

Six woke up to a sore back, arms, and legs, but she was alive so that was a plus. “Hey.” Came a familiar neutral voice. “Im guessing you got whatever kind of mutant it was that beat the shit out of me.” He nodded as she stretched out her arms and got up slowly. Looking around she realized they were in one of the jail cells “Had to get to a safe space until you woke up.” He stayed as if it was the most normal thing. “Thanks buddy.” She have him a small smile, they looked threw the last cell and found the ghouls friend laying on the floor. She sighed and turned around before shutting the door. “We don’t have anymore Stealth Boys so we gotta get out of here fast.” Something felt wrong to her about leaving the ghoul laying there like that but there wasn’t anything she could do. They made there way back to the ghoul waiting for them. Hearing the news she could tell he was upset but he kindly got out of there way afterwards.

Finally dealing away with what they called themselves the Nightkin she and her sniper friend went up to inform the ghouls upstairs. Jason’s thanks was short and sweet as he rushed into the basement with his other disciples as he waved to Six for them to follow him. As they reached the basement he gave her the rundown “I waited to speak with you one las time before I descend to the launch pad, wanderer. I want you to know that we will remember for all eternity how you delivered us to the threshold of the Great Journey.” He waved his hands in the air majestically trying to show his excitement “Our preparations are nearly complete, but the rockets that carry us to salvation are yet missing vital components.” Six shook her head and sighed knowing where this was going. “If you would still help us, wanderer, speak to Chris. He can tell you what is missing. There is no way we can thank you enough, your arrival here was a blessing. We will remember you always.” He smiled brightly and with that Jason Bright bowed his head and walked down to the launch pad with the rest of his followers.

Chris walked in looking slightly grim “Jason says that I am to cooperate with you on the final tasks necessary to launch the Great Journey.” She nodded “How can I help?” He told her the items and a very vague way to find them and with that they Six and Boone made their way out of the basement through a latter “ Why waste out time with this?” Boone’s voice was laced with irritation “I don’t think we are wasting time, If it helps them find happiness.” He looked at her bewildered as she was studying where to go on her pip-boy map. Help them find happiness? He hadn’t seen it that way at all. Why does she even care? No one helped anyone in the Mojave, but she helped him with not even a thought of payment. Why is she trying so hard? He couldn’t wrap his brain around it. “Okay so I think I know where we can find one of these things, it’s a little bit of a walk past Novac.” He just nodded and she lead the way forward.

Gibson’s Garage was the first stop on the map “Hi there. I’m old lady Gibson, or so they tell me. I’ve got odds and ends for sale, and I’m pretty good at fixing things too.” Six chatted with her for a bit and talked about how Gibson missed her husband, and how they used to scavenge REPCON. It wasn’t easy but Six managed to get a good deal on the part they needed “Thanks so much ma’am!” They shook hands and headed off the the next location. Which was harder to find then the first but she eventually did “Alrighty we should be good. Let’s get back to Chris!”

After they returned with all the stuff they needed she needed to get something off her chest that has been bothering her “Hey Chris, why won’t they let you control anything on the launch pad?” Chris sighed in annoyance “When I joined the flock, Jason made it clear that he wanted me to supervise the repairs, not do them myself. It would be a waste of my gift to work on just one system at a time. Form up here, I’ve been able to supervise the entire project.” She shook her head “The radiation down there would kill you, Chris. Because you’re human.” He crossed his arms and grumbled “Typical human trying to mess with me. I was human once, you know. Grew up in Vault 34, northeast of here. Nice upbringing of you like assault rifles and target practice. But oh, you like machines that don’t shoot people? Not so nice the.” She looked back at Boone for a second who just looked bored “Who should maintain the Vault’s reactor? Houser? Mitchell? No -make it Haversam. He likes machines!” He ranted for what seemed like hours but was only seconds “So you left your vault because.....you were bald?” Rage showed in his eyes “Bald? You call this bald, smoothskin? I’m a monster! A monster!” His hands turned into fists “Look Chris, Jason told me himself, The Great Journey is for ghouls only. You’re not going.” His eyes widened and suddenly he realized “Oh god! You’re telling me the truth aren’t you..!” He was so angry and upset for a second he couldn’t think straight and even contemplated sabotaging the whole project until six convinced him otherwise “There’s a little town called Novac up the road, you could set up your new life there.” He looked like he had tears in his eyes “Life among humans again? That’s what you’re suggesting? I guess....I guess it’s the only chance I’ve got.”

As they walked out of the basement and headed upstairs they heard Jason voice on the speakers, he was talking to his followers about how the Great Journey will save them and how they were grateful for Chris and her. Six and Boone entered the Launching pit and set off the rockets. Loud music played as they witnessed the rockets launch high into the sky faster then anything she had seen before. The room filled with smoke and they quickly headed out of there. “I still don’t understand what the point of that was. It’s idiotic to think that they will actually find a great beyond.” Six stopped and look up at the stars “I don’t think it was....I mean sure it sounds far fetched but I think it’s amazing to have something that gives you so much hope, real or otherwise. It’s something to fight for, something to make each day count.” She looked down at him and gave him a genuine smile. “Come on, your friend Manny owes me some answers.” She headed off first as Boone stood there in shock by her words. Fight for hope? I guess that’s a good enough answer...for now.

#fallout fic #fallout new vegas #courier six #craig boone #come fly with me #fallout oc

[comedicreliefonlyworkswhenfunny]

Villain! Deku au; chapter nineteen: A Glimpse

If being paired together wasn’t bad enough for Bakugou and Todoroki, the smog that polluted the air diminished their visibility and made it hard to breathe. The heterochromatic boy had picked up one of the Class B students, Kosei Tsuburaba, who had collapsed mid-scare. Bakugou cursed as he could have sworn that he saw that tree before, or was he just losing a his mind from this thick fog? “Do you think the villains did this, too?” they both had seen the smoke rising from the tops of the trees. ‘No, this was a quirk that their allies had released to hinder their battle capabilities! How could he overlook the quirk that clearly no one on their side had!’ the blonde bit back the retort, not wanting to waste what little air he did have. “I hope the others are doing okay, but there isn’t much we could to do help them…” the gas made his thoughts swirl, so he was talking to try and keep his sanity. Bakugo hated it; it reminded him too much of Midoriya’s mumbling. He could still recall that unreadable expression on his face as he jumped. The exhausted boy standing in the subway. What had happened? What did it all mean? “We should get back to the facility, since this test of courage isn’t important anymore,” saying the smallest things, “Ragdoll was at the midway point, so she should have this area covered.” It pissed Bakugou off. How dare this bastard remind him of a memory he worked so hard to repress. Hadn’t Midoriya died? Was he just some sick joke haunting Katsuki at the most random times. “Don’t give me orders,” he snapped, trying not to think about the weak smile of the useless hero-wannabe. A person? “We were one of the first ones out-” if not the first, so there shouldn’t be anyone in the path, right? That apparently wasn’t true, looking at the creep in front of them. Todoroki was uneasy; there was just something about this guy that he didn’t like. That something happened to be everything, but his aura, his stature, hell, the very idea of him just seemed to send a shiver down his spine. “Pretty, pretty,” he loomed over something that the boys couldn’t see from their positions. “I gotta work, work, work, but I don’t wanna leave it,” he was clearly in a dilemma over this object that he found. “Tokoyami and Shouji!” Todoroki just barely recalled the pair leaving before them. Neither of the two had paid much attention to the groups, so it was no wonder that it took them so long to figure out. “Alluring flesh, blind me no longer. I need to get to work,” Moonfish hadn’t heard the boys behind him, being so wrapped up in his obsession, until they spoke loudly and clearly. “With this psycho on the loose? There’s no way I’m not engaging,” Bakugou hissed. A chance to protect his classmates and get his mind off of his childhood friend that’s existence was clouded in mystery? Hell yeah!

Regret was almost instant. His weird teeth quirk had both range and strength. Bakugou couldn’t get close enough to land a blow, narrowly dodging the blades. He continued to charge forward, looking for any opening. Todoroki, however, was getting quite annoyed with his partner, having to always throw up a guard when dodging was completely out of the question. Maladay’s voice called out: “The students are the targets! Fight back if you must, but don’t engage otherwise!” Moonfish didn’t really want to be here. He quite disliked fighting and was quite attached to chaining up corpses from his kills, but fighting? There were just too many ways to mess up the pretty flesh that he loved looking at. “We are the targets, don’t you get it?” the gas was way to flammable for Bakugou to have any input in this fight, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to carry Tsuburaba’s unconscious body. “Fight back, don’t fight back- make up your damn minds!” he charged forward, “Fuck it! Fighting is our only option!” Bakugou rushed forward, a spark ready in his hands. Moonfish had heard his obvious battle cry, sending a tooth his way. The blonde barely dodged it, watching a wall of ice emerge from the ground. Moonfish had heard that, too, the cackling that the ice made before it shot up. He hated the split haired boy’s quirk. Ice was cold. It didn’t feel good. He hated it. He wanted meat. Meat was warm. Flesh was pretty. He wanted meat now. The two hero trainees were arguing about Moonfish’s credibility. He had been on death row and back again; two lousy kids didn’t matter. They weren’t kids, per say, more like bags of meat with pretty, perfect flesh keeping that meat together. “An explosion would start a massive fire, you know that, right? It could kill all of us,” Todoroki knew that Bakugou wasn’t stupid, but he was doubting his knowledge, seeing how revved up for a fight the blonde was. His stance was open and his fists raised, legs bent as if he was about to lunge. “I’m not a dumbass!” his partner doubted that. Moonfish didn’t care, digging his teeth into the ground, trying to find that warm blood he craved.

Deku had no regrets leaving Kota where he was as the villain trudged through the thick underbrush. He searched the forest for a target, not wanting his only action to be defeating Muscular and saving a kid that wasn’t even from his team. He stepped through the forest, his eyes catching a dust of frost that most likely belonged to that Todoroki kid. It would be best not to engage with someone like that just yet; he wanted to save the strong ones for when he put on a show. He felt a wave of pure negativity wash over him. Good, it was someone easy to manipulate. The screams got louder and louder until they were ringing in his ears. There were two distinct screams; that of the boy and that of the beast. Deku debated how to get the beast’s attention, feeling sorry for the boy caught inside the black abyss. Just as the shadowy head was about to jerk his way, Deku felt himself being pulled down. Shoji tried to calm his breath, just barely catching the kid before Tokoyami noticed. Not recognizing the silhouette, the boy thought it was a Class 1-B kid, but, looking closer, he realized that assumption was wrong; he just saved a villain. Deku felt all of the fear that the six armed boy- Shoji- had been feeling. He felt the regret and sorrow. “Your friend has lost control, huh? Since his quirk resembles a shadow, I’d say his weakness is light, right?” a moral dilemma fell upon Shoji’s shoulders. Surely he couldn’t just tell this person- a villain- his friend’s weakness! However, he might need to if either of them wanted to get out alive. “I think I know where we can find some light,” Deku spoke absentmindedly. He was almost certain that the frost belonged to the half-fire, half-ice boy, so if he could just get the guy to use his quirk and calm the morphed shadow- Tokoyami, if he recalled the hero beside him’s memories. “What do you mean?” just how much did this villain boy know? Shoji immediately cursed himself for being too loud, attracting Dark Shadow’s attention. Deku pushed the hero student over to avoid being hit with a devastating blow. “We need to hurry! Now! Are you going to follow me or let yourself get killed?” heroes and villains were titles that didn’t matter at the moment; the only titles that had significance in that moment were dead or alive. Not-Tokoyami was already preparing his next shot. Shoji had no choice but to believe the boy, even if he was a villain. “Do you want your friend here to be a murderer?” Deku hissed, manipulating the hero student so easily. Shoji couldn’t let Tokoyami deal with the pain of having a dead on his shoulders. There might not actually be any light up ahead, but it beat staying where they were.

Moonfish didn’t look the brightest knife in the crayon box, but the creep could fight. He used his unusual quirk to fuel his desire for flesh. It was just their luck that the classroom pretty boys were up against a powerful pervert. Both being much too socially awkward to talk to other people, it was no wonder that they couldn’t talk to each other. They were running out of time and ideas fast. Both boys were dazed as an unexpected saviour showed up. Dark Shadow was violent and wild, attacking haphazardly and just angry at the world. “He’s out of control. I’ll light a fire-” Todoroki began, but Bakugou cut him off. “Don’t, not yet,” this was the best thing that could have happened to them. Deku and Shoji ran, catching the attention of Moonfish as well. “Meat! Mineeee! No, no no!” the creep was clearly disgruntled; he hated kill stealers, like the ominous shadow before him. His dagger teeth shot forward, “I will slice up their bodies! Me! Only me!” he yelled. However, that didn’t work for Dark Shadow, with Tokoyami’s fighting desire to not hurt his friends, along with Dark Shadow’s defiance, “Don’t order me around, weakling!” Dark Shadow screeched, tossing Moonfish around as it crushed him in a shadowy grip. “See that?” Bakugou pointed out; it was a good thing and cool as hell, but even he was terrified at the moment. The boys who were once so still jumped forward; Todoroki igniting his hand and Bakugou sparking his palms. Tokoyami fell to the ground in an instant as Dark Shadow recoiled from the light. “Oi!” Bakugou yelled before Tokoyami had a chance to spew nonsense about how sorry he was or how much stronger he needed to be. Bakugou had eyes on the one trying to get away. Shoji would admit that he was about to let the villain go; he couldn’t find himself viewing the green haired boy, whose name he didn’t know, as a villain after everything he did. Todoroki sent a wave of ice towards the figure running away. Deku dodged easily, jumping into the light where the hero students could see him, “Good evening,” he smirked. None of them could move. Tokoyami was trying to keep his emotions in check. Shoji was shocked that the male could make a face like that, despite the fire in his eyes when he was convincing Shoji; “Do you want your friend to be a murderer?” it still stuck in his mind. Todoroki immediately noticed the face of the boy who barged into his waiting room, who reassured him that his fire was his own. Bakugou looked at a face he hadn’t seen in what felt like forever.

Asui and Uraraka were just up the path from where the boys were, facing quite the enemy. Toga bubbled, seeing two cute girls within her grasp. She managed to sneak up on the cute brunette girl, cutting her arm. Asui took stance to protect her friend, “Are you alright, Ochako?” she wanted to make sure. Toga had such terrible luck with finding people to drain, but her luck had changed! She found two cute girls. Examining her knife, however, soured her mood slightly, “It’s so shallow, not good, not good,” she whined. “Who just runs at someone with a knife? What’s wrong with you”” that was a stupid question on the girl’s part, obviously they were in a fight with a villain, and there were many things wrong with the blonde in front of them. Toga, however, wasn’t listening, “I’m Toga! You two are adorable!” she beamed, not quite understanding the true concept of an enemy. “Urakawa and Asui!” surely if she demonstrated that she knew their names, the girls would be less alert, though Toga had a bit of a lisp when speaking. “To think I used to have to make a biiig wound and slurp you up!” she was never taught how to filter her words, when to say things, when not to say things, so she kept talking, “But down I just need a kiss and it sucks it up for me!” Her costume was such an upgrade compared to what she originally had to go through. The girls yelled as Toga charged at them once more. Asui wrapped her tongue around her friend and threw Uraraka far enough to get a bit of leverage. “Get to safety! Just because we can fight doesn’t mean Aizawa wants us to!” she yelled- her mistake. Toga saw the opening as broad as day, throwing a knife dead at the girl’s extended tongue. Uraraka’s “Stay safe, Tsuyu,” was pretty useless, seeing as her friend got hurt the moment she said it. What it did do, however, was bring joy to Toga’s face. Tsuyu! That sounded so cute she just couldn’t help repeat it, “Tsutsu! Tsutsu! That’s s cute! I wanna call you Tsutsu, too!” she beamed. “Only my friends can call me that!” Asui’s meaning and Toga’s interpretations were two entirely different things. “So we’re friends, now? Great!” for obvious reasons, Toga didn’t have any friends. She was far too much of a sociopath to understand true “love.” However, the blonde wasn’t dumb to battle strategies. She saw Asui leaping forward and threw her vial like a dart, catching the cute loops in the green haired girl’s style. “Tsuyu!” Uraraka saw her friend being pinned to a tree as she was trying to run away. Of course, she immediately turned around. “You’re bleeding, Tsutsu! How cute! You really are adorable!” Toga had no indication of boundaries, and Asui was getting pretty tired of it. The scene felt off as Asui looked into Toga’s gleaming, terrifying eyes. Her face was only getting closer and closer, and twelve feet away was too close her Asui’s tastes. “Get away from her!” Uraraka yelled, charging towards Toga. The blonde didn’t worry too much about technique, throwing her knife forward, knowing that the chances of the brunette dodging that were slim. However, Uraraka had no intention of dodging that. ‘Grab their wrist and the back of their neck, while pivoting to a blind spot. Push down as hard as you can, and then pull their arm up their back:’ it was what she learned at her internship with Gunhead. “Can you tie her up with your tongue, Tsuyu? Assuming it doesn’t hurt to badly” Uraraka knew that the chances of her holding this were slim. Asui was in awe of her friend, despite looking like the human adaptation of a puppy, she could turn almost terrifying in an instant. “You’re amazing!” she had to gush before helping the girl out, “Just give me a minute.”

Toga said the first thing that came to mind, “Spectacular is a girl in love~” she cooed, recalling something she had heard back on the streets, “You’re in love aren’t you?” Toga loved distracting her opponents and having conversations with cute girls, so this was a win-win! “I get it, I get it, I’m a girl too~ You’re probably thinking about them right now!” even if she wasn’t, she was now. Though Uraraka couldn’t think of anyone like that, surely the blonde didn’t mean her friends. “You think about them, act like them! Don’t you just wanna be like them? Do what they do; live how they live! Thirst is unquenchable! Until, before your eyes, you take over that person; you are them!” people typically can’t handle the things that go on in Toga’s mind- it was why she liked Deku so much. The blonde knew that her words creeped people out, so, if she kept talking, their guard would go down. “Do you have a type? I do! I like people who smell like bloodshed and look like a fight! I just can’t help it when I look at their mangled bodies as I chop them up! They’re so fun, hey, Ochako?” The brunette was to disturbed to notice the small shifts as the blonde talked. Her needle found its way to Uraraka’s thigh, “Gulp, gulp,” she cooed. “Ochako!” Asui’s tongue rushed to her friend’s side when she saw the the stab wound, since she was still stuck to the tree.

Shoji, Todoroki, Tokoyami, and the unconscious Tsuburaba broke through the tree line. “Everyone!” Asui called out. Toga pushed the brunette off and started for the woods. “I don’t feel like dying tonight, so I’ll say bye bye!” she bounded off to find weaker prey. “Are you two okay?” Shoji stepped forward. Asui helped Uraraka up, “Yeah, we’re find, but what about you guys?” the brunette spoke up. “We were chasing a villain- well, Bakugou was,” Tokoyami spoke up, the only one who could truly view the green haired male as a villain. “Then where are they?” Asui spoke up, not seeing Bakugou or this supposed villain. “They weren’t that far ahead of us…” Todoroki swore he had just seen the violent blonde locks two seconds before they broke the tree line.

((Once again I apologize. I might not be able to link the following chapters))

[janetbrown711]

‘ c’mon, lazybones. you’ve slept enough. ’ obviously Louie and literally anyone else

"C"mon, lazybones. you’ve slept enough," Donald rolled his eyes, "Get up so I can get you three to school on time," he started playing with the light switch. Louie groaned. "Uncle Donallddddd," Louie groaned and covered his eyes."Louie, I let you sleep in a whole half hour later than your brothers. Get dressed now," He signaled 'I'm watching you' and walked out of the doorway. Louie groaned and rolled out of the bed. He stood for a moment, adjusting to the motions of the houseboat, then stumbled to the closet to pull out a green button up jacket with one too many holes in it and a dark green shirt with a pattern of a spaceship on it. He walked up to the door and peeped through the crack to make sure no one was coming down the halls, which no one was. He darted back into the closet and took out a slightly beat up laser pointer, a t-Rex toy, and a yo yo he had all found in the garbage the previous day. He took the items and shoved them in the pockets of his jacket, which he noticed was starting to get holes in the pockets themselves. He made a small mental note he knew he'd forget to ask Donald for a new jacket... Preferably a sweat shirt this time. Slowly he walked back into the halls and into the small kitchen where Huey, Dewey and Donald were already done and cleaning up breakfast."You slept late," Dewey grabbed a blue backpack from a coat hanger. "Shut up..." Louie sighed and sat down."Louie, we don't have time to wait. Here," Donald handed him a piece of toast, "eat this, we need to go." Louie nodded slowly and Huey gave him a nervous look."A-are you sure Louie feels well? Sleeping in can be a sign of a sickness such as the flu, uh... Measles...? A few other things... According to the Junior Woodchuck Guidebook," Huey tried act like Louie looked sick, but he was always the worst liar."Boys, I don't have time for this. We need to get going now," Donald grabbed the other two backpacks and shuffled them out of the boat and into the car. Louie sighed and stared out the window as Donald drove onward. They arrived at the school in the matter of a few minutes as Donald quickly dropped them off and said goodbye. The triplets waddled into the main play room and set their bags down in a cubby. Dewey ran off immdietly to the playground to go and play pretend pirates on the playground, and Huey wandered to the sand and started digging. Louie sat on a bench by a tree and waited for his first costumer to come by, which didn't take long.A young owl boy walked over with crumpled up money in his hand. "Hello Owen, so what'll it be?" Louie asked."You know what I want," he tapped his foot. Louie suddenly remembered that he was a whole year older than himself so he got straight to the point and pulled out the laser pointer."State of the art, you're lucky I found it in such great condition. That'll be eight dollars," Louie grinned and held his hand out."Woah, eight dollars? Im not paying that much," Owen crossed his arms"I'm sorry good sir, but I'm only selling it for eight," Louie pulled away his hand."Wait!" Owen sighed, "I have eight... Here," he opened his hand to actually reveal a crumbled up ten, Owen was not the brightest Bulb. Louie smiled and took the money."Pleasure doing business," he gave him the laser pointer and Owen walked away. He made eye contact with Huey from across the playground, who sighed and shook his head. Louie looked away and shoved the money into his other pocket. Louie sat and waited for someone else to walk by, but neither of his other clients showed up, so he set his head down and closed his eyes in defeat. After about two minutes of rest he felt a tap on his shoulder. "Hey, kid," it was some big guy... Perhaps a fourth or fifth grader, much older than Louie himself, "you sold me this, right?" he held key chain of a dog that when you pressed the button, his eyes lit up and he made a really obnoxious sound. How could Louie forget? He nodded."Well it doesn't work anymore and i want my money back!" the guy slammed his fist on the table, but Louie didn't flinch." I'm sorry, I have a strict no returns policy," Louie tried to sneak around him, but the kid wasn't alone. Two of the guys friends surrounded him. Louie gulped."Well then we have a problem now, don't we?" the kid cracked his knuckles. Louie looked around for a way out."Look, I make sure everyone is aware of my policies and such. It-its not my fault you broke it.""It broke after two days. Gimme my money back or I'll pound you!" the kid got closer to Louie."I don't have your money!" Louie said."Well, looks like its pounding time for you then!" his to friends grabbed Louie and held him down while the main kid prepared to punch. Louie flinched and closed his eyes. Just as the kid was about to strike, Louie heard a "stay away from my brother!" and heard the running of feet. Huey and Dewey."Oh yeah? Whatre you gonna do to stop me?" the kid didn't move from his pose of 'about to punch Louie in the face'. "We're gonna beat you up sooooo bad," now it was Dewey who cracked his knuckles."Or... Maybe we can be civil and talk about this. No one has to get hurt," Huey had a bit of sarcasm. The kid glared at the triplet brothers. "Unless you have fifteen dollars I don't wanna hear it," the kid raised his fist higher. Huey lunged into position, waiting. "We do not," Dewey said. Louie internally slapped his forehead."Well then... Your funeral," the kid punched Louie square in the face and Dewey leaped at him. Suddenly, all Louie saw was punches and hits and older boys and his brothers, he didn't even know what he himself was doing anymore. It felt like self defense, but who knew. Out of nowhere a whistle blew and all six boys froze in their place. A goose teacher walked over and snapped at the boys to all go to the principals office, to which they all groaned, but obliged. As they walked Louie looked at his brothers and say that Huey's knuckles were bruised, but there wasn't much damage otherwise. Dewey looked far worse than him, he looked like he had a bleeding beak, several bruises on the arms, it was a mess. Louie didn't want to guess what he looked like.First, the three older boys went into the office, then the triplets did. It was boring, and was the usual talk of 'don't get into fights' and 'we don't accept bullying or physical violence, but that doesn't mean you have to fight back' and blah blah blah. The only good thing that happened was that the principal only said he'd levae a message for Donald, not make him come and pick the boys up, which was a relief for all three of them. Then, the principal wanted to talk to Louie all by himself. His brother walked out slowly and with a fake sense of shame on their faces as they slowly nodded to Louie as they left.Once they were gone, Louie looked everywhere, except at his face. He looked at posters, mirrors, chairs, jars of lollipops, star student awards, all sorts of things. He pondered how much a kid would pay for one of those..."Louie, why do you do this?" the principal asked. Louie glanced at him."What... Do you mean?" "Why do you always get in trouble?" he sighed and took off his shiny red glasses. Louie made an 'I dunno' sound and he sighed."Louie, I'm going to ask you something and i want you to answer honestly."Uh oh. That's never a good sign.Louie nodded."Is your Uncle Donald the most capable person go take care of you and your brothers?"The question. That stupid question. Everyone had it on their minds, but only few had the guts to say it to their faces. Louie felt his blood boil. Words couldn't describe how much he loathed the question. "Yes," Louie said with a grim and assertive tone."Now look here, Louie I-""Shut up!!! You have no idea what its like!! My brother's and I are happy. Uncle Donald keeps us happy, and fed, and educated in your stupid school!!! He is he best guardian I could ever ask for!!! Don't you dare ever say such a thing ever again!" Louie stood. The principal was stunned into silence. He tried to say words but it turned into a stuttered mess. Louie waved his and walked out of the office, slamming the door which made the office ladies all jump. Louie stormed down the halls, hearing the principal call out his name, but choosing to ignore it and ran off to the janitors closet to hide. He got in and turned off the lights. He sat on the ground next to the mop, pulled up his knees to his chest, and started balling. He hated school. He hated this. He hated all of the adults and some of the kids whispering. He didn't want to be here. He wanted to be home. He wanted to sleep. He wanted his family to have money, but he only knew one way how. Finally, he heard a knock on the door, nd heard the lock click. Louie looked up and saw it wasn't any of his brothers, or any janitors, but Donald..."Uncle Donald! I-I" he quickly wiped the tears from his face and stood up. Donald hushed him and gave him a tight hug. Louie was quick to hug back. " I'm sorry, Lou," Donald whispered."What about that job interview thing?" Louie asked."It doesn't matter. I'm sorry," Donald hugged tighter, "are you okay?""Yeah... I'm okay... I'm okay..." he took a shaky breath in and out " I'm always okay, as long as youre still here, Unca Donald."

[artificialqueens]

Raja's new outfit (Raja/Raven) ~ Hobnob

AN: AU where Raja gets a God complex and Raven has soft skin!!

My Dad has a bit of a God complex i think. Not all the time but when he’s doing lego he’ll make the little men do stuff like fight to the death and de-limb eachother. Once he made a houses of parlament lego model and did an all out lego election in wich he had final say over everything, proper unsettling. I leave the house whenever he starts that shit then sit outside tesco for a bit.

Anyway, set your standards lower than a limbo bar, its time to get freaky.

The room felt stuffy as Raja and Raven sat together in the now empty studio, cameras and various bits of tech facing towards them. They had just finished filming Fashion Photo Ruview, and were eager to escape the studio to grab a pint.

Raja didn’t dare look up, not after filming. The cameras did something to her emotionally. Each device felt like individual pairs of eye’s looking over Raja’s every feature, as if they were casting judgemental stares and broadcasting them to millions of viewers.

In a sense that was what Raja was doing too. She was critiquing outfits queens had put work, time and effort into, casting them aside as if they were nothing. She was in no position to take any moral high-ground when it came to judgment.

She felt like some sick false God. For Raja Fashion Photo Ruview used to feel more light, less forced. Nowadays she found herself wincing every time she uttered the words ‘boot’ from her mouth. She was shattering emotions with a single catchphrase, hurting feelings with a cheap gimmick.

A sick sick god.

Raja contemplated wether Raven felt the same sometimes. They were both equally ruthless when it came to critiquing, but she never saw that bit of hesitation in Raven. Part of Raja envied that. She kept her gaze fixed at the floor.

“Raven?” Raja spoke finally, turning towards the large green screen behind them. Hell, even the background was fake.

Raven looked up from her phone, raising a perfect brow. She looked immaculate as always, a total toot. Youtube comments seemed to agree, though people were always less than enthusiastic when it came to Raja’s looks. She used to be ’the look queen.’ Where did she go wrong?

“Ive been thinking it’s time to stop the show.”

Raven did a double take, her nude lips hanging open, her eyes a mixture of disappointment and confusion. Raja snapped her head back to the floor, biting the lower part of her lip.

“Raj I don’t understand” Raven began, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Everything’s been going fine…Is something wrong?”

Raja went tense. She scrunched her eyes for a moment as she was forced to think about all the pain she’d caused.

“Who are we to tell people what looks good and bad.” Raja balled her fists, locking eyes with Raven. “What gives us the right.”

Raven sighed, moving her hand away. Her lips thinned into a sympathetic smile. “Is that it? I thought I’d done something to upset you.” She chuckled to herself, flattening out a few stray hairs around her wig. “It’s just harmless fun raj, people know that. Beauty is subjective.”

Raja grimaced. Fun? It was anything but fun. How was she meant to toot and boot looks with all this crippling guilt. Why didn’t Raven feel the same way? Surely she felt something.

“i-i don’t look better than half the girls we judge. Im such a hypocrite.”

Raven was taken back a little bit. She paused as if considering her words. Aesthetics had always been a sensitive topic for Raja, and she wasn’t really keen about touching upon it.

“I used to be an icon Raven, you know that? A fashion icon. And here i am looking like-like…” Raja gestured to her outfit. It was a beige suit with a small stain on the corner from last nights lasagne. “This! telling other people what they’re doing wrong, just to feel better about myself.”

Raja embraced the silence that followed as Raven looked at her with concern. She needed to say that more than anything in the world. Her breathing felt erratic. After a long pause from the pair Raven finally spoke up.

“If it’s about feeling…inadequate then…lets get you a new outfit!”

A new outfit?

“The ultimate toot, maybe even a shoot?”

What Raja wouldn’t give to wear a look worthy of a shoot. She’d combust on the spot. She could almost see the youtube comments gushing over her eleganza.

The ultimate toot.

Raja was having her very own personal epiphany. She knew that a show stopper outfit would put her back in the book of legends. She’d be able to judge makeup and outfits without a hint of remorse, and even better, toot and boot again.

“Raven you always know just what to say.” Raja laughed for the first time that day. She looked up to her friend who was returning the smile.

This outfit would have to be something pretty special to rudeem herself. Something unexpected. Something…nude coloured? Raja looked over to Raven. She really was immaculate. Her face was beat for the god’s. She never managed to look stale despite wearing her makeup the same every day. Gorgeous.

“I don’t want to hear any more talk of you leaving.” Raven interrupted her train of thought, popping a mint into her mouth. “I don’t know what i would do without you.”

Raja offered a smile before patting her hand. Raven’s skin felt so smooth as her touch lingered for a little too long. Raven furrowed her brow but otherwise smiled back.

Smooth. Immaculate. God Raven was perfect.

Raja’s new outfit, needed to be made…of Raven’s skin.

“Thats enough emotions for one day, don’t you think?” Raven quipped, getting up from her chair. Raja needed to take action immediately if she was going to pull this off. Almost instinctively she grabbed her arm in protest.

“For fucks rake Raja what now?”

A pause ensued.

“Does…does this rag smell of chloroform to you?”

~

Raven groaned and reached to rub her face, only to find her hands had been restrained. Her eyes shot open as she felt her chest rise and fall erratically.

She looked down to her arms and legs, mouth agape in terror. All her limbs had been tied down with thick tulle fabric and hair. The entire scenario was odd to say the least.

She wasn’t at home.

She wasn’t in the studio either.

Raven’s surroundings were dark as her head darted around, searching desperately for any kind of answer.

“Nice of you to wake up.”

She recognised that voice anywhere. Raja Gemini.

“Raja why am i tied down? This prank is proper messed.” Raven said through shallow breaths, settling her gaze on the shadowy figure ahead of her.

“Prank? No…” Raja spoke softly taking a large step forwards, ruvealing grim contours of her face under the dim lighting. “Messed? Yeh a little lol.”

“Alright well…thats enough now just let me go.” Raven spoke with an urgent tone, giving an unconvincing smile. She noticed the glimmer of something metallic grasped in Raja’s hand. Alas, it was slightly too far out of her peripheral vision.

“I’m afraid I can’t do that Raven.” Raja deadpanned rolling a large metal table over. Raven feared the worse.

“Remember what you said earlier? An outfit worthy of the ultimate toot? Maybe even a shoot?”

“i-i may recall that yes.”

“Well i need you for that outfit Raven.”

“Like sewing tips?”

“I’m going to use your skin for my outfit.”

“What the fuck.”

Raven should of seen this coming. Who asks whether a tissue smells of chloroform. She’d been dicked over.

“You little shit i should’ve known.�� Raven said, clenching her fists. “Untie me so i can knock you around.”

“SHhhhhhhh” Raja dragged a finger along Raven’s lips and smeared it around a little. “You and me Raven, we’ll go down in the year 7 history textbooks because of this.”

Raven began to sob. “How do you expect to make my flesh into fabric even i don’t think you thought this through.”

Raja brought a knife into Raven’s line of vision and grinned. “Goodnight Raven. Nevermore shall the burden of this heavy world drag you down.” She said, slowly hovering her knife over to the centre of Raven’s chest. “Any last words before i shank you up?”

“Yeah Manila should’ve wo-”

The knife was plunged. Raven’s expression softened as all life drained out of her.

Perfect. She was ready for…preparation.

~

Raja sat in the chair she always sat in.

Green screen behind her.

Cameras in front.

She grinned. The crew had entered the set moments prior and were enamoured by the craftsmanship of Raja’s outfit. Her poise, her elegance, the draping of the garment. Every move she took was her’s to control.

Raja had done it. She was a God.

Skinning Raven had been quite a task, though suprisingly satisfying. She’d dealt with network executives before, so skinning her best friend was nothing she couldn’t handle. After that it was all a matter of hems and stitches.

“Were about to…start filming…Where’s Raven?” One of the camera crew managed to choke out, never tearing their vision away from Raja’s masterful display of artistic genius.

Raja needed to come up with a classic excuse. Shit. What did they always say when one of them didn’t show up?

“She’s…sucking dick.”

All the camera crew nodded, seemingly satisfied with the answer provided.

The director gave a countdown. The cameras began to roll, casting their visions to millions of viewers. After all, what is a God if not a public figure with influence over others? The bending of wills, planting opinions and views into young minds.

None of that mattered anymore though really.

All that mattered was Raja is the ultimate toot. ~

AN: If anyone knows how much stamps cost can they message me thanks.

#hobnob #raja's new outfit #raja gemini #raven #raja x raven #tw gore #rpdr fanfiction #submission #crack fic

[gastricpierrot]

Title: When Stars Align

Series: Daiya no Ace

Pairing: KuraRyou

Rating: T

Summary: Nothing good ever comes out of an intimate relationship between a human and a youkai, Ryousuke knows. He’s heard more than enough stories on betrayal, on disasters, on families being shunned. And being an onmyouji, he knows better than anyone else.

And yet, he lets himself fall.

Note: im late aGAIN AHAHAH im gomenasorry

Also on AO3

[Ch.1][Ch.2][Ch.3]

[Ch. 4]

As per usual, Ryousuke’s greeted by the foulest mash of aura to ever grace the land of Japan before he even sees the first signs of the Capital city.

He squints towards the distance as though to judge the night itself, chanting a spell under his breath to strengthen the layer of barrier between himself and the abomination of the Capital’s presence. Really, he fails to understand how anyone with even the slightest spiritual sense would be able to remain there for even a week. Ryousuke could feel malice pressing against himdespite being this far away; nauseating, making it difficult to breathe. It’s another reminder of how baffling human adaptation could be, he supposes.

He turns back to poke at his fire, exhaling a slow breath through his mouth. He’s high-strung. The Nine-tailed Fox; the overbearing city; him being so far away from familiar territory—it all builds up as pressure in his chest. That’s not good. He can’t let it affect his performance, can’t let his guard down for even a second if he wants to come out of this with minimum setbacks towards his own wellbeing.

They’re watching. He can sense youkai practically surrounding his campsite; curious, wary. Ryousuke keeps his gaze towards his fire, having learnt by now that it’s always better to ignore them as long as they don’t stir up some kind of trouble. Stay away, he makes sure the message’s extra clear anyway because he really doesn’t have the mood to spare dealing with them at the moment. If you value your life, I’d suggest for you to keep that distance.

Fortunately for him, none of them are stupid enough to test him, and he manages to find some sort of rest through his final night of travelling.

Despite the overwhelming youkai energy infesting it—so much so that even Ryousuke has to pause before strolling in past the layer of barriers—the mortal side of the Capital is lively as ever when he arrives. It’s late afternoon and the streets are packed with people; parents trying to keep their children from wandering too far off, errand boys shouldering bulking sacks as they hurried to their destination, people leading their horses by the leash, carts transporting goods and the higher class. As he makes his way further towards the city centre, canvas stalls and wooden houses are gradually replaced by solid buildings and stores, unnamed lanes to developing districts.

Unsurprisingly, youkai are also everywhere.

Ryousuke sees them everywhere he looks. In the urn at the entrance of that restaurant, perched on rooftops, lounging on people’s hats and shoulders, peeking from alleyways. There seems to be even more of them than Ryousuke remembers, both in number and variety. The barriers have no doubt worked to keep youkai out, but it’s also trapping those who manage to slip in from exiting. Most of them look harmless, but it’s not unusual for even insignificant youkai to manage something bad if they had enough numbers. What was the Bureau doing, letting it all progress to this point?

“Ryousuke-san!”

Ryousuke focuses towards the direction of the voice, taking a moment to spot its owner among the loose crowd of people around him. A young man in the Bureau’s standard uniform wades his way towards him, features set in a grin brimming with underlying mischief.

“Kazuya,” Ryousuke greets, “skipping out on your job again?”

“Straight to the point as always,” Kazuya winces slightly. “But nah, you were taking a bit of time to arrive so I volunteered to come escort you in case you got lost or something.”

“If you had that much free time, you could’ve done something about this place.” Ryousuke makes a vague gesture around them. “You guys are probably used to it, but it reeks here.”

“Oh, believe me, we tried,” Kazuya says, falling in step with him. “We’ve done our best to keep the larger and stronger ones under control, but the small guys are just endless and plain stubborn. With all that’s going on recently, the Head eventually decided to ignore them and focus our efforts where it’s needed more.”

Ryousuke hums, peering towards the first signs of the Imperial Palace. He knows better than to voice it there and then, but the timing of it all is too suspicious for it to be a coincidence. It’s not difficult to guess that the Fox’s presence is what’s causing this sudden influx of youkai everywhere; the malevolence is so profound this close that Ryousuke could almost feel her physically behind them, watching their every move. He clenches his fists, fighting to keep his sudden wave of irrational fear in check. Stay calm. I’m still in control, he reminds himself firmly. I’m still in control.

“Come to think of it,” Kazuya continues, though Ryousuke senses the growing discomfort in his tone. They had never gotten along all that well, so having their conversations die down after some quick exchanges have never been rare. He guesses Kazuya must be pretty unnerved himself, to make the effort of keeping it up this time. “How’s my dumb cousin doing?”

“Knowing your kind, you’d have to specify which one you’re referring to,” Ryousuke remarks, chuckling his apology at Kazuya’s subtle expression of long-suffering pain before going on. “But if it’s Eijun we’re talking about, all I can say is that he still hasn’t quite grasped the concept of an ‘indoor voice’.”

“I’m surprised you still haven’t exorcised him after this long,” Kazuya observes, to which Ryousuke only shrugs. “Did Haruichi ever end up making him his familiar?”

“I don’t think he’d want to even if he could,” Ryousuke says, “though it’s not like their relationship would change much even if he did.”

“Nothing less to expect from Ryousuke-san’s brother, huh?”

Ryousuke smiles, otherwise making no further comments. Fortunately, he doesn’t need to. He nods his greeting at the guards on duty at the gates of the Bureau as he passes through, finding himself subconsciously taking comfort in the familiarity of his surroundings. The Capital City may be a madhouse compared to the tranquillity of Ryousuke’s village, but at least his workplace pretty much has the same vibes wherever he goes.

“I expect you should know your way from here, so I’ll be leaving first.”

Ryousuke doesn’t even flinch when he turns and faces a completely featureless Kazuya. “Sure.”

Kazuya’s expression is one of exaggerated disappointment when it blinks back into existence. Ryousuke doesn’t know why he even tries. That trick has long gone stale for him, after all those years of trying to console and convince a much younger Haruichi that no, Eijun’s face isn’t gone for good he’s just kind of terrible at transforming. At least Eijun’s improved a lot on maintaining his human form now; Ryousuke’s had enough of all the times he’s called to investigate a place for a noppera-bo sighting only to have Eijun running over a bit later to apologize for his carelessness. He’s in fact mastered it to an extent that it’s easy to forget he’s a mujina at all, since he barely ever reverts back to animal form now.

Ryousuke takes a deep breath only after Kazuya leaves, putting the thought aside as he heads to report his presence. Now’s not the time for reminiscence; it’ll only make his situation feel more dreadful than it really is, more final. He’s got to focus.

It’s far easier to focus on what he has to do than what might happen to him in the process.

xXx

Haruichi winces at Eijun’s fifth sneeze, silently hoping he wouldn’t return his handkerchief until he’s at least given it a rinse.

“I’m okay,” Eijun declares before he can ask, running the cloth messily under his nose after taking a huge, messy sniff. He mutters his thanks when Haruichi passes him a glass of water, gulping it down with a sort of comical exaggeration his almost every action always carries. All his life, Haruichi has arguably not seen anyone as extra as Eijun when it comes to… well, a lot of things. He supposes he’s partly responsible for that; Eijun’s somewhat grown into the overly boisterous image of himself he’s tried to project for his sake when they were younger despite knowing how risky it is for him to attract so much attention. They were fortunately able to cover up for all his misses over the years; it’ll be a pain if people were to discover that one of Kominato Ryousuke’s younger brother’s closest friends is a youkai himself. Though with their lineage, Eijun being a youkai in disguise is the least they’d feel scandalized over, honestly.

“Is it because of the dust, I wonder?” Haruichi muses aloud as Eijun works to clear his nostrils. Eijun shrugs, trailing behind him towards one of the shelves in Ryousuke’s study. Haruichi scans over the neatly lined books, picking out the few he thinks would contain the information he wants.

“Are you looking for more stuff about the Fox or whatever that onii-san’s gonna face in the Capital?” Eijun asks, squinting at a title on a book spine with words even Haruichi can’t read. Haruichi hums, adding one last book to his stack and making his way back outside and to his own room. “You sure you want to know more, though?”

Haruichi knows he means well, asking that. Even if he doesn’t have the ability to change anything, he wants to at least be prepared for any worst case scenarios. Ryousuke might try playing it off as the usual, but Haruichi is aware that the match-up this time could not be worse.

“Say, Harucchi?” Eijun speaks up a bit after they’ve settled down on the floor. Haruichi makes him wait until he’s finished the sentence he’s reading before glancing up at him, prompting him to go on with a slight raise of his eyebrows. “I know I’m probably not in the position to ask, but is there something wrong with onii-san?”

He shifts uncomfortably when Haruichi straightens to face him properly, reaching to rub the back of his neck. “How much did you overhear the other day, exactly?” Haruichi asks, already contemplating over how much he should reveal. There are some things he simply doesn’t have the right to tell, not if he respects his brother.

And he respects him a whole lot.

“Uh, everything, basically,” Eijun admits hesitantly, tensing in expectation of a few sharp words from his companion. “I remember you mentioned about something acting up?”

Haruichi falls silent to that. They’ve always managed to keep Eijun away whenever Ryosuke’s episodes happened, haven’t they? Eijun hadn’t been close enough to him yet for frequent sleepovers during the times when Ryousuke would still spend entire nights alone somewhere in the mountain forest, working himself to the bone learning how to tap into the powers of the entity residing deep within himself while keeping it from taking over his body. He’s never seen the numerous times when Ryousuke’s impenetrable composure could still falter because of the monstrous effort it takes for him to maintain control. He doesn’t know how when Ryousuke first started his training he merely had the abilities of an average person, and how people used to look at him with faces ranging from pity to utter doubt when he used to declare he’ll one day be one of the best onmyouji that’s ever lived despite his stature and the fact that he couldn’t cast a single spell until his early teen years.

Eijun doesn’t know that part of the reason why their parents are never around is because of Ryousuke.

“It’s okay if you can’t tell me,” Eijun quickly amends when Haruichi’s silence stretches out for a tad too long. Haruichi is honestly at loss over whether he should tell him anything at all. There doesn’t seem to be any merit to it; Eijun could accidentally mention it in a conversation and possibly cause some sort of uproar. Onmyouji with youkai relations aren’t exactly the newest things around at this point, but the stigma around it still persists. Ryousuke most likely wouldn’t want him to know due to more personal reasons as well; he’d loathe it if he’s going to be treated differently just because someone knew the truth—especially if that someone chooses to feel anything besides a certain level of healthy fear towards him.

“I’m sorry, Eijun-kun,” Haruichi decides, absently thumbing the page corner of the book on his lap. “I don’t think I’m in the position…”

“No, no, like I said—it’s all fine!” Eijun assures, gesturing wildly with his hands. “It’s not really any of my business in the first place.”

Haruichi flashes him a small, grateful smile. “If you’re really curious, I think it’s best to hear it from aniki himself.”

Eijun nods, reaching over to fetch the topmost book out of Haruichi’s stack. He opens to a random section, absently flipping the subsequent pages over. “So. You’re looking for things about kitsune, yeah?”

“Nine-tailed ones, to be exact,” Haruichi corrects, focusing on his own book once more. “I want to see if I can find anything besides what I already know.”

“If it’s a weakness or something, wouldn’t onii-san have already read about it by himself?” Eijun asks, stopping at a page with a particularly striking illustration. Haruichi stares at its title, trying to decipher the upside-down characters but to no avail.

“Well, yeah, but…”he can’t seem to say the rest of it, fearing that if he does they’d inevitably come true. Ryousuke’s strong and he’s not working alone this time and yet it’s because of who he is that Haruichi feels a new wave of nausea at the sudden concern that seizes him. Foxes have a fierce sense of connection with their own kind; if there’s anyone who can possibly influence Ryousuke by sheer will, it’d be a nine-tailed fox spirit. And even if she doesn’t get the chance to do anything to him, what consequences would the potential public revelation bring? How would the Bureau react?

“Harucchi.”

At the sound of Eijun’s voice, Haruichi jolts out of his thoughts.

“Onii-san will be fine,” he assures, grinning with a confidence that doesn’t waver like Haruichi’s own. “It’s him we’re talking about, after all.”

“He’d be severely offended if he finds out we’re worrying over him like this, huh?” Haruichi manages a slight laugh, reluctantly allowing himself to take in some of Eijun’s positivity. Still, it doesn’t change the feeling of helplessness that comes with only being able to wait. “It’s frustrating, but I suppose all we can do for him now is pray.”

He blinks at him when he sees him stiffen visibly, very obviously hit by some sort of idea. Eijun steers their conversation away before he could ask, though, proceeding to launch into an animated recollection of his experiences with the kind of youkai described on the page he’s stopped at. Haruichi finds no further will to question him, deciding that some things are still best left to Eijun and his own devices.

He just hopes he’s not going to do anything overboard. Again.

xXx

“You want me to what.”

Youichi thinks it’s probably about time for him to clean his ears because he’s pretty this brat just asked if there’s any way he could check on Ryousuke for Haruichi.

Was it something he did? Had he done something lately that gave him the idea that he doesn’t value his life? Because Eijun might as well have asked him to exorcise himself first to save Ryousuke the trouble of kicking his butt for hijacking his mind. Unlike actual gods, Youichi isn’t omnipresent, so the only way he’ll be able to more or less “see” how he’s doing is by entering his consciousness. Ryousuke was merciful the last time, but Youichi isn’t sure he’ll be as lucky right now. Or ever again in general, really.

Though, he does have a pretty good guess that Ryousuke’s extremely distracted by something at the moment. Against his better judgements, Youichi’s left a miniscule remnant of the short link he’d formed with Ryousuke the other day, also with the subconscious intention to make sure he’s at least still alive. Ryousuke would no doubt have already noticed and gotten rid of it if he’s his usual self; he either can’t be bothered now, or he hasn’t realized yet. Whatever it is, Youichi can tell he’s ridiculously stressed at the moment. He could feel his tension even through the slight, negligible link between their minds; he’s like a rope pulled taut for so long that the edges at the centre are already beginning to fray before it eventually snaps. Youichi can’t help marvelling at him for being able to function despite bearing that sort of weight on his shoulders. What he’s feeling is merely a fraction of the real thing, a second-hand sensation of sorts—and he already feels slightly queasy.

But even more than his borderline inhuman drive to keep going regardless of his inner turmoil, Youichi ponders more over the root of Ryousuke’s anxiety. They’re talking about a person who has the power to even stand up against a minor god here; what’s there about the nine-tailed kitsune in particular that has him so tensed up and on guard? Sure, she’s been impossible to beat for a century now, but Ryousuke would still have enough confidence in himself without lowkey fearing for his life, wouldn’t he?

Or has his every confrontation with youkai actually been like this? Was it just that Youichi never noticed because Ryosuke has simply achieved that level of skill when it comes to hiding it?

“Who do you think keeps this place safe while Ryou-san’s off doing his thing, huh?” Youichi sighs wearily when Eijun repeats his question with a volume about a solid hundred levels louder. Really, just because mujina are good at projecting their voices doesn’t mean Eijun has to do it when they’re just two metres apart.

“Can’t you spare some time during the day or something? You spend most of your time just lazing around anyways,” Eijun argues, and Youichi just about to explain that there are very important reasons to his lazing around when he decides it’s not worth the effort.

“Look, I know you’re doing this for Haruichi’s sake, but you have to understand one thing—“he proceeds to tackle Eijun into a headlock and grind his fist against his scalp—“Ryou-san would probably flay me alive when he comes back if I do that, and you’re an idiot.”

“Isn’t that already two things!” Eijun protests, thrashing violently until Youichi releases him. “And only idiots call others idiots!” he accuses, jabbing a finger at his direction.

“Yes, yes.” Youichi makes a dismissive wave before crossing his arms. “If you’re thatkeen to know, though, why don’t you just turn into a bird and fly there or something? I don’t think it’ll take that long by air.”

Youichi braces himself for more yelling when Eijun opens his mouth, but he clams up without saying anything in the end. Huh. Did Youichi accidentally thread on a sensitive subject?

“Don’t tell me,” Youichi raises his eyebrows, “you’re bad at transforming?”

“’Course not!” Eijun denies, and Youichi could practically feel every sentient being within a fifty-meter radius wince simultaneously. He hesitates a bit before speaking again, mumbling under his breath as he does so. “It’s just that I promised onii-san that I’ll take care of Harucchi while he’s gone.”

Youichi takes half a minute to process that. Then oh, the implicit message behind Eijun’s words dawns him. It must be the Capital City that he has issues with. Youichi can’t exactly criticize him for that; he isn’t that fond of it himself. He’s passed by a few times during some journeys with his master, and the impression he immediately got was along the lines of ugh no thanks. To put it crudely, the smell alone reminded him of his master’s feet—which reeks like a pile of rotting fish—only about fifth times more pungent. He remembers being sourly told not to involve himself at all with the gods residing there if he could help it too because they’re all pieces of work who think they’re better than everyone else.

Frankly, Youichi always thought his master’s always been a little overdramatic, but he figures he has nothing to lose listening to him when it comes to deities. They’ve never been fond of youkai, and the feeling’s mutual.

“Well, sorry to break it to ya,” Youichi sniffs, “but I’ve been asked to watch over him while Ryou-san’s away too.”

“Then doesn’t that mean you’re already multitasking? What difference would doing one more thing make?” Eijun demands, and dear lord Youichi can’t tell if he’s seriously that dense or if he’s simply refusing to listen. He spends a moment to study him; spotting the telltale furrow across his brow, the tension in his jaw, the way he’s clenching his fists—and feels something in him soften. He’s genuinely just trying to support his friend in whatever straightforward, albeit slightly outlandish way he can, isn’t he? As much as Youichi hates to admit, he’s a sap for stuff like that. He can’t dislike him for doing his best to look out for someone he cares for.

Youichi exhales a long breath, deciding he’s probably going to regret this. A lot.

“Okay, listen,” he begins, holding up his palms in a sort of placating gesture. He sends a quick prayer to whoever’s kind enough to bother listening for Eijun to not start freaking out. “If it makes you feel any better, I am still maintaining a tiny link with Ryou-san’s mind right now. What I can deduce through that is extremely limited, but at the very least—“ he shoots Eijun a stern glare to shut him up before he can speak—“I’d know if he’s dead or alive.”

For a second, Eijun looks like he isn’t able to accept that. Then as Youichi watches, the fight seems to leave him all at once, and he averts his gaze, slouching his shoulders. So even he can look like that sometimes, Youichi muses. Even someone as aggressively stubborn as him could finally realize when to give in.

“I’ll definitely let Haruichi know if anything happens,” Youichi assures, doubting his own words the moment he voices them because can he really tell he boy if there’s a chance he won’t ever see his brother again? “Though, I’m sure Ryou-san would have everything under control somehow or another.”

When he realizes that isn’t enough to get rid of Eijun’s pensiveness, he does the only thing he could think of. He trudges behind him, and kicks him at the back of his knees. Eijun yelps, promptly proceeding to demand what that was for and accuse him for being a horrible guardian deity because people in his position shouldn’t be needlessly harming other youkai. Youichi merely answers with a trademark cackle and some snarky retort, hoping to keep this front up until Eijun leaves. Call him superstitious or whatever—it’s always foreboding when the boisterous ones become quiet. Youichi has his own unease already; he doesn’t need Eijun to make things worse.

Because surely, Ryou-san knows what he’s doing and getting himself into, right?

xXx

There’s a blanket of tense silence settled over the group of onmyouji entrusted with the task of aiding the holy ritual.

Ryousuke moistens his lips as he moves with them towards the designated hall in the Imperial Palace, willing his heartbeat to find its calm already. It doesn’t help that the summer heat is extra overbearing that day; harsh sunlight beating down on them in the exposed hallways, their robes doing more to trap the heat in than keeping it out. The only good it’s doing is making Ryousuke’s sweat less conspicuous since practically everyone’s mopping their faces every five minutes or so.

They’re led by the main person in charge of casting the spell, a man said to be a descendant of Abe no Seimei named Abe no Yasunari. He’s skilled, yes, though not to the point of being “spectacular” per se. Definitely not as prominent as his predecessor, but since Abe no Seimei had direct blood relations to a youkai it’s not much of a surprise. If anything, the fact that Yasunari is as good as he is now proves that he’s a person worthy of carrying the weight of his family name. Ryousuke’s seen him work a few times firsthand; his methods are highly efficient and effective,albeit slightly orthodoxical. Just because he doesn’t particularly stand out like his grandfather or the few among them including Ryousuke himself doesn’t mean he isn’t amazing in his own right.

They eventually stop before a set of sliding doors, Abe no Yasunari exchanging a few words with the men standing guard before they’re granted access. At this point, the tug in Ryousuke’s gut that’s been building up ever since he entered the city has morphed to something resembling an intense burn. She’s close, and it’s starting to react to her presence. Ryousuke takes a deep breath, swallowing thickly. It’s alright, he’s trained enough to handle this. He’ll be fine, he’ll be fine.

He then steps in through the entrance of the hall, and meets the gaze of the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen.

*to make things clear, miyuki's a tanuki and eijun's a mujina!

#kuraryou #kominato ryousuke #kuramochi youichi #diamond no ace #daiya no ace #i wanted to put this up a week earlier but then i discovered that my phone doesn't support copy pasting formatted text so??? welp #fanfiction

[sweater-daddiesdumbdork]

Stay Safe (Early Years)

Summary- 3.7k Curtis Everett x Y/N. Curtis is appointed by McGregor as second and preparing for the McGregor Riots. Traumatic almost Non Con event described. Written by request for @that-damn-girl​. Thank you so much for your love of Curtis babes. This is a complete rewrite, I have another version that I might post later as a “this could have been what happened between these two” lol.

Curtis sat among the men, his back braced against the wall, listening. They were collected to hurry to Gilliams, which could only mean one thing. McGregor got word somehow about the next part of the plan, for the revolt. The revolt they been planning for the past two years, Curtis had just been allowed to join McGregors inner circle, and now he leaned forward to see a map of the train cars and McGregor had his finger on one. "The water car. This here is where we gotta get past. From what this map says, there is only one water car.” 

Curtis scanned the map, but it was so dirty and worn, it was hard to tell what else they were looking at. It seemed a good portion of the front end was sleeper cars, entertainment cars. The middle, working class. They were growing food, making goods, and what also looked like hospital cars. Then a few storage cars and finally water. It made no sense to Curtis why they would have the water car so far back, just before the prison. Shouldnt it be near the front?

“Okay, so we go take the water car, or get past it?” Another member asked, shrugging. “Its like 7 cars to get up to the water car. How much further do you want to go McGregor?” Absently McGregor scratched at his beard, thinking. “What do you think Gilliam, make it the goal to get up to at least these food cars? We need it, desperately. They been halving our rations for some time now.” 

“Tactic to weaken us.” Gilliam sighed, rubbing his face and leaning forward slightly on his cane. “They know were gonna feed our children first. Weve already proven that ages ago.” The mans rheumy eyes glanced at Curtis, who looked away from the gaze.

Curtis’s placed his palm against his arm, easily feeling the scar through the fabric of his jacket. Most everyone... The guilt of his actions in the past flashed across his face momentarily before going back to his cold demeanor. Clearing his throat, he spoke up. “Where did you even get this intel anyways? Does anyone know if this map is accurate?”

“Its accurate, I paid dearly for this, and lets leave it at that.” McGregor gruffly stated, agitated that he would be questioned. Curtis quieted his questions as McGregor continued, laying out the rest of the plan. Which was simple enough. The ones in the first row would charge the meager amount of guards who did the daily head count, and get a hold of there weapons. Keep one alive, that was the important part. They needed his accessibility to open the doors. “Remember, Keep at least one alive, prefer two though. Just in case.” He stressed to all of them. “Not a word to anyone either. This will all stay hush until were finally ready.” 

“When is that gonna be?” Curtis decided to question again, and Gilliam this time answered. “Its almost new years, and there will be more activity back here.” The whole group groaned. Every year Minister Mason brought the tail end boiled eggs, and did a long winded speech in several languages about how Wilford was the divine and merciful. “So after we cross the bridge and do the tail end mockery, we will start.” Gilliam rubbed at his face. “Okay, leave me now. I need to rest.” 

With shuffles the people started to filter out, when McGregor stalled Curtis from leaving, leaving just the three men left in Gilliams space. “Curtis, we needed to speak with you specifically.” McGregor said, and Gilliam nodded in confirmation. 

“What?” Curtis asked, his brows arching in question. 

“Im tempted to keep you from going son, simply because if something happens to me, I need you to take up this cause.” McGregor tapped on the map. And Curtis shook his head in confusion as to what he is saying. 

“I dont understand, nothing is going to happen, were going to make it to the food cars.” Curtis stated with conviction. 

“We probably will, but we also need to be realistic here Curtis. If we dont get that far, there needs someone to take right over and keep this up with Gilliam. Getting the people out of this cage is the most important. I know your young son, but people already respect you. Your cool headed and smart, I know I will be leaving it in capable hands. And its just a precaution. Plan B.” McGregor explained. “And no one but Gilliam knows, so dont go mentioning it to anyone.” 

Curtis nods, still trying to process, and he looks between the two men. “Im not sitting this out, I refuse to. Weve come to far to sit it out.” and the two other men shook there head. 

“We already figured you refuse to sit out, but your not gonna be in the very front in that initial charge, your going to bring along the rest until we at least get enough weapons in hand.” Curtis was glowering already at this news and before he could say anything, Gilliam said sharply. “Curtis its already settled. You will do this cause Im asking you to.” 

Blue eyes that were enraged shut down at those words, and he gave a nod. Turning, he ducked out, stuffing his hands in his jacket pockets, lost in his thoughts as he weaved around the people doing there usual activities. When a holler caught his attention, and lifting his gaze, he saw you with a whole pile of kids racing down the aisle. Grabbing one into a hug, your tickled him and he squealed, making all the kids twist back like a flock. They all tackled you, and you mocked scream, tumbling out of sight into a bunk with them. His worries temporarily set aside, he made his way down to where you all disappeared. 

“Y/N, you still alive in there?” He ducked down enough to look in, and your hand shot out to grab ahold of his, which he pulled you out, your face flush with laughter, and you grab a hold of his coat to steady yourself. “With those little hellions? Never... they make me so proud, I raised them to be ruthless.” Giggling while you are still trying to catch your breath and you wag a finger in the bunk. “You all better be hidden when I come back.” Hooking your arm through Curtis’s, you pull him away, still brushing your hair from your face and smiling up at him. 

“Where you been all day?” you questioned as the two of you walk away from the bunk, and the kids scramble out to go hide away from you, you glance over your shoulder to take notice where they are headed, not that there was many options for them to go. As long as they werent disturbing other people to much. Turning back to Curtis, you tilt your head to look up and study him, his face was clouded and agitated, you could see where he was tensing his jaw enough to tic, something was certainly on his mind. 

Giving you a side ways glance, he gave just one word and then it all clicked for you. “Gilliams.” Of course, not that you were exactly privy to it, but you heard the whispers making there way through the train. It was like a match sparked being thrown on gasoline, snaking its way among the people, giving them all hope, and restlessness. Already you seen a spike in your parents clinic of people getting into mild fights. Dabbing away at the cuts and scrapped knuckles, warning them to keep clean as possible cause infections set in so easily. 

It was a ignited fire that was only getting hotter with time. 

You press your shoulder against his to drag more words out of him. “What else Curtis?” He looks like hes about to say more, working the words up from his chest, his eyes sharp in there resolve, and before he can open his mouth to fill you in, McGregor comes up from behind, and clasps Curtis’s shoulder in greeting. “Hey you two, coming up to the front soon? They are about to hand out protein bars.” A look, one that you very well caught, passed between them. An uneasy feeling sinking in your chest. 

“Yea, we will be headed up soon.” Curtis snaps a bit at him, and you wrinkle your brow at the odd interaction. Curtis watched McGregors retreating back, and tugged you lightly off to a small cubby, you stumbling into the out of the way place between the pipework that crisscrossed in the space between some bunks. “Curtis? what is this about?” 

“Listen to me Y/N, shits about to happen. And its gonna be just what youve been hearing. Im sure you and your folks will be part of clean up, but promise me you wont leave this car till weve made it through, okay?” Curtis’s eyes searched yours looking for confirmation, anything that you were going to listen to him. A slight nod is given, and you pick at your hands before reaching out, and fisting your hands in his jacket.

“Dont fucking get killed either Curtis, promise me that, okay? I know your going to insist on going.” So matter of fact, you knew your friend, he wouldnt be able to live with himself otherwise. You watched him for years punish himself for his desperate acts in the past. That fear that anyone would hold it against him, the way he grasp at his arm when he thought it was all to good for him. You knew, Curtis still hadnt forgiven himself. 

“I wont, I promise...” Fake promises, he couldnt look you in the eyes when he said this, no one could never know if they will return once they leave this car, but your look made the man ache in his chest. How he wished he could bring back that smile you had on just minutes earlier. You shined, a softness in all this hellish darkness. You have been there for him since the beginning, you came right out of that darkness from where you were hiding with Mat and fell to your knees, trying to stop the bleeding where he tried to cut off his arm. Curtis didnt even know how to react that day, when you at 13 showed more compassion then any of the others did, then he did. Your eyes wide in your fear, and yet you refused to pull away from him “Its okay, you dont have to do this, see?” Your words still echoed through him. 

It just continued, always you were piecing him back together again, seeking him out to wrap an arm around him when he missed human touch, making sure he felt you vibrate against him in your laughter when you leaned against him, your grin seeking his to flutter for a moment on his lips, teasing voice singing his name.The times your tears soaked on his shoulder, your hug rattling in his hold as your sadness penetrated the anger. When did it all really matter that much he held onto you like a life line? His life line. At some point for him, you crossed that line as just friend. And he felt it blossom through him with a heated desire he never felt before. What would it be like.... to have you as truly his? Forever his? You were just to good for the like of him. He would be a dark mark on you,  scrubbing forever to rub out his stain. 

Curtis didnt know how it happened, but in that moment, he had to know. Had to know if you were just as soft in his arms as you were strong, and his hands moved to cup your face, your cheeks fingers pressing back into your hair, and that was just what he imagined, silken tendrils wrapping around his fingers. You went wide eyed in those seconds, and yet never pulled away as if he was scaring you in any way. Your eyes softened for him, and when he pulled you in closer, your head tipped to meet him. That first touch, a soft press of lips was innocent sweetness, soft brushes of lips and breaths. 

Your innocence certainly made him continue forward gently, a tilt of his head and soft nibbles on your lip, a press of his tongue made you open in surprise and he let that kiss deepen. You were clumsy in it, always a little behind, but Curtis led you with encouraging strokes, the whole sensation dragged out a moan from you, a flush of your body pressing into his. His hands tightened slightly in your hair, and breaking from you, his forehead leaning against yours with soft pants shared between you. No you werent his, but what he wouldnt give for you to be. He was still trying to calm the fire you laced through him in that kiss. 

“I promise... I will come back Y/N” Crystal blue eyed promises now, and you accepted it far better this time, your lips still tingling from the contrast of soft kisses and brush of bristling beard, to his tongue filling your mouth, laying claim to you as his. 

But havent you really been his for a while? Even when you didnt know it, he was your safety, your dark guardian. 

Always looking out for you, protecting you.  

Drawing your way out, you are sure to slide the curtain closed for your patients privacy, and start making another round to see to other people, chat with them, just see if they need anything in general. You dont notice the wandering eyes following you, weaving through the people till you got to a quieter part of the tail end. You didnt notice, not until its to late when an arm shoots out in front of you, making you pause momentarily as it blocked you. “What the... Eric, what do you want?” You try to duck under his arm, but the mans grasp on your arm pauses you. A glance his way showed a handsome young man, blond locks curling around green eyes, that glinted coldly at you, and he firmly without any choice of your own backed you against the wall. “See youve been playing little home nurse again Y/N”

“Just helping mom and dad, can you please let go?” You try tugging your arm from his grasp and his other hand came up to your face to trace the curve, obviously not ready to loosen his hold, for whatever reason you would clam up around him, your heart fluttering and your breath quickening. Some would think it was innocent attraction. But it was more fear of what he would eventually do to you if given the chance.

“When you going to let me kiss you huh? I dont see why you keep fighting me on this.” He hovered closer, his breath washing over your face and you wrinkle your nose at it. It was hot and sour to you, you tried to pull back but there was no where else to go, so the back of your head would thump against the cold metal wall.

“Im not, I dont want to and you cant change my mind.” You wriggle once more trying to get him to stop digging into your arm. “So how about you go find one of the other girls? I know there are plenty who want to be with you.”

“To easy, I rather like the one who denies me” His voice dropped deeper, making you panic sightly. His eyes, you hated the way he would stare at you, following you from wherever he was, like you were a prize to be had. "I figured it's about time I change your mind about it though." You strain out of his touch on your face and go to push against his chest to stumble him back.

"I said no! Fuck no would I ever be with you, let alone kiss you" you snap at him, turning to leave, put distance between you two, back in a crowd. Eric was to coward to try to anything with people around. He snarled though, wrapping an arm around you.

Effectively he pinned your arms helpless and your back against your chest, falling back harder then you expected, making you helpless, his hand clasped over your mouth, effectively muffling any protests you had. "What you think your to good for someone like me sweetheart. If your good enough to get Curtis's dick wet, think you can mine as well without this much of a fight." Your eyes widened at his words. I haven't, were not, stop!... Just friends, you think in as your panic is washing over you, and he manipulated your head to fall back to his shoulder, you try twisting out. Then he pressed his face in your neck, and bit you, what started as a sloppy kiss turned into a bruising bite, yelping at the shock of pain and you try kicking him hard enough in the leg behind you to drop him. The tread of your boot slid down the inside of his leg, and he pushed you away from him to crash you against the trains wall, hard enough to bounce you off, making you groan from the harsh impact.

Erics hand whipped you around, effectively pinning you with his body. No way to leverage a kick again, and hands pinned your arms down to keep from attacking. "Fucken shit head!" Your voice raised into yelling at him, where was everyone? It was eerily quiet and no one around, he smirked at your struggles, dawning on you when you saw how turned on, felt how turned on. That foreign bulge dug into your belly. "Keep struggling Y/N, just makes me hard for you, so cute thinking you don't want this."

"Your vile Eric, like those front end pigs" nothing but disgust dripping from your tone, trying to hide your fear. But he knows, it just widens his predatory grin knowing your words were masking the fear coursing through your veins. His lips hovered so close, mocking tone as he brushed them barely against yours, as you tried tilting your face away. “Come on Y/N, just one little kiss for me. Do it and I will let you go.”

You glare at him and spit, right in the fuckers face, it runs down his eyes and nose, and you smirk at him as he starts cussing and wiping his face on his sleeve. “You little fucking cunt whore! Nasty pig think you can get away with that shit?!” His hand releases you and goes to hit you when a grasp catches his wrist, wrenching it back. Both yours and Erics eyes go wide in surprise, and you see Curtis glowering behind him, firmly twisting Erics arm hard, then harder again he snarls out. “She sure as fuck is gonna get away with it. I think she told you no”

Curtis jerked Erics arm further and a crack was followed by Eric screaming and letting you go, you slid away from his grasp, Curtis jerking him forward to take where he had you pinned before. They were evenly matched in size, but Curtis had him crushed between his body and metal, his face distorted as you glanced up. It struck you in this moment just how opposite these two men were. Curtis never once raised his voice in the time youve known him,but he had to raise above Erics squealing out in pain and anger. “When a person tells you no, It fucking mean no. You owe Y/N an apology.” He pulled Eric off the wall, and kicked at the back of his knees to drop him in front of you.

Curtis loomed over him, his arm still firmly twisted up between his shoulder blades, and growled in the mans ear. “Say it, or Im going to wrench it right off your body.”

“Im sorry!” you could see the effort it took Eric to say it, but Curtis clearly wasnt satisfied.

“AGAIN!” This time he really roared, Eric cowering a bit, and remorseful, he started again.

“Im sorry Y/N, I promise to never touch you again!” Curtis glances at you and nods that its okay, he had him firmly and you stepped forward, grasping the mans hair, and tipping his head back.

“Touch me ever again, or ANYONE on this train, your dead, do you hear me Eric? I will have no problem watching you die, either by my hand or another. Am. I. Fucking. CLEAR?”

“Yes! god yes, just let me go, it wont happen again.” Eric pleads, and you step away from Eric, and circle around to Curtis’s side. Shoving him harshly away, Eric rolled to a stand and clutched his arm, racing away as fast as he could. The coward, would probably make up some lie to cover face when he made it to your father to reset the arm. You stood next to Curtis, still fuming. Your fear from earlier forgotten, now you were just enraged watching where the coward disappeared.

“Hey, he aint gonna try messing with you again.” Curtis let his hand rest against your shoulder, looking down at you.

And thats what Curtis always did, he never expected more from you, not a thank you, not any kind of favor. He simply needed you to be safe, that was all he ever asked for from you. It was something that you could give him, he so desperately needed. 

You lick your lip, they are still swollen from the kiss, and you blush just a bit at the memory of his mouth on yours. He tipped his head, letting his thumb brush lightly on your cheek and he moved to kiss your forehead. 

“Thank you for that Y/N.” and you shifted in closer to press your face against his chest, your arms sliding around his torso, just holding him, memorizing this feeling right here, cause your first kiss, shook the words right out of you. 

You didnt know what would happen in the days to come, but you knew that right now, things between you two changed, having finally crossed that line. 

Tags-  @jtargaryen18 @what-is-your-plan-today @official-and-unstable-satan @p8tn0lish @stardancerluv @princess-evans-addict @patzammit  @that-damn-girl @curtisbbq @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @thatweirdwalangpake

#curtis everett #curtis everett x y/n #snowpiercer #amber writes #sweater writes #soft #trauma #fanfic #chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #curtis everett fanfiction

[redlemonz]

Day #9

Nothingness again. I furthermore am reaching the conclusive clarity that she's already moving on with her life away from me. And once again, that's great, but when it seems as though it's so easy for the other party - I'm not sure where it leaves me at all in everything, let alone her life. Who am I to her at this very point & what does she feel? It's not something I can question or have any right to for that matter, because it's not my business at all. The reality keeps sinking in that we're not together regardless of how we act towards each other - even if there are aspects of our relationship that feel so unchanged, familiar and comfortable as if we were still best friends, as well as more. But we're not, and the distance continues to inch her away from me which each day that passes. I want nothing more than to see her and be in her presence, even as a friend right now, but that's just one of us at this stage because she's made it clear that I can't come to see her at this point. Meaning, don't interrupt her period of healing and moving on from any leftover thoughts about me in that way, because well, even though she joked about giving it a couple weeks of distance - could it actually be coming to fruition? Am I just another meaningless soul all of a sudden? Well is exactly how I feel unfortunately. Either way, my mind is the culprit of doing this to myself once again - the overthinking & drawing of conclusions that would hurt my heart, and accordingly punish myself in preparation for the potential correctness of my perception upon us. All of our friendly banter and conversation - I've just overly romanticised a bit in my head due to the fact that it makes me so uniquely happy, when really it's just nothing more than as stated - friendly banter and conversation. And the snaps she sends me are unlikely special for just me - I'm probably just part of a generic group who receives them all. Because I'm not actually special.. at all. Not anymore. I smirk at myself, as this dawning revelation (which should've obviously been common, logical sense right?) reminds me yet again, that I'm an idiot. Day 9 - fear of being forgotten At work, mid week - it's gonna be the second social soccer tonight without her. Sucky. She's been a soccer star since she was very young after all (and was of course my shining star also). Still reflecting upon my craziness and stupidity to even think about looking for an alternative job in her town. Dropping everything for a girl who doesn't even want me anymore, after we've fallen apart. What in the world was I even expecting would change? Nothing. She probably still wouldn't even wish to see me even if I were down there, and would ultimately and ironically distance herself even further away from her overly attached past. It's not even about utilising that last hurrah mentality of "what more do I have to lose?". Because there is still much to lose. It would undermine my affection and care for her a friend, and our current after- relationship circumstances, as it implies that is not enough. I've been more than graced and lucky to even still have her in my life the way I do, and part of my mind is telling me to ruin that by taking inevitably non-positive leaps in the wrong direction. Because there's always underlying, yet absolute minuscule hope that we as human beings create for ourselves - fake as it may be. To help us get through. If only I could find a balance between this craziness and leaving things completely into this nothingness I feel. What kind of loser just steps back and watches it all fall apart, even when all the odds are stacked against him? It's not very superhero, or vigilante like, for that matter, of me. It's just not me at all to give up like this so soon. But I'm learning that not being me is a good thing, especially in this case. The fact of the matter is that she wants me to step back and give up, though knowing my otherwise nature. And even it kills me and my principles, I at least have to try.. for her. So I'm the kind of loser who has to keeping reminding himself that this is the best methodology to ensure I'm putting her first, above my own selfish desires. Being human is truly fucked up. Never having the knowledge upon what's right and wrong for certain, with the exception of what your own brain and accordingly, perception, dictates it to be. Just a constant, damned life of learning until it's too late, and you've already missed out on what really matters. What I can visibly identify is wrong is the fist fight that me and one of the three just witnessed outside the mall in our break. Up to 10 teenagers of mixed gender just swinging away at each other - just another fucked up representation upon our society today, and how we devalue each other as human beings. Even more messed up, back in the office, the first question we received upon explaining what just happened, is whether we video recorded it. No - didn't even cross my mind, because it's absolutely stupid and even more messed up. We called the police straightaway and stuck around in a reasonable vicinity, so not to put our own lives in harms way, but to also ensure there was no fatal results. This all just conveys how incredibly mindless people can be - which doesn't rule me out as an exception. Just because I'm not violent in the physical sense to others, doesn't mean I haven't been emotionally or mentally. Which I have been to her and others in the past I suppose, due to my own inability to think and function as a better human being. Because look at me even now - pondering the selfish ways in which I could ultimately screw up her life even more. Though it would never be my purposeful intention ever, acting upon the possibility and risk of that knowledge is just as criminal, maybe even worse when you can grasp an understanding of it. All I know is that I'm not a good person, no matter what I do. Because I either can't do anything right, or can't ever do enough. Just like how I'll probably be a liability in soccer tonight too - not looking forth to the social surroundings, and having to speak to people once more. I don't wish to answer any questions directed me about how I'm doing, and how I'm handling everything that's going on. Which is why I'm probably being an asshole and I'm not responding to a few concerned friends who keep messaging me. I don't want their pity, I have enough an endless supply for myself already in this bottomless pit I keep falling through. I just hate the amount of effort required these days to try and continue to function in every environment Im placed within. I'm not normal and I can't be, and never will be. I've been messed up since much before than I can even bother to remember, and though I've made it this far, my march is slowing down, and my feet are just tired of waking on this burning coal. Football went as expected, nothing much to say. Tried my best to be upbeat (probably too much - many occasions of utilising bad puns than usual - likely subconsciously also inspired by her) to hide any light or visible display of feeling like an outcast from society. The pack still felt empty without her presence. These occasions just continually make me miss her more. Perhaps we wouldn't have gotten smashed either in tonight's game if her goal scoring feet of fire were present. Anyway, so I went home alone after soccer again and got some takeout on the way - reminiscing yet again, and promoting the lonely soul even further. A part of me really has been lost.. it remains with her. Can't put your heart into things as much as you'd like when it's still damaged I suppose. So she snapped me a picture - received my little package in which I sent her some pieces of our city. I can now reveal the very anticlimactic truth that they were simply shells from various different beaches around the City. Also a small pack of chocolate shells to make up for the disappointment and well, feed her addiction (that has been emphasised upon in a previous day). She took it well I guess, because she didn't get mad about it - visibly to me anyway. Hopefully she didn't mind the gesture. Yes I'm still potentially thinking too much about it, and even more so, as a negatively conclusive thought. But hey, pessimism is key right? I mean I've said countless times now that I can never do the right thing, or enough for that matter. Nothing makes a difference in the end - my fate has already been sealed. I'd rather just time hurried up & let me die alone already. It's what I deserve for not being enough, and not being able to live up to anyone's expectations. A constant disappointment who probably peaks at first impression, and then rapidly fades into an oblivion of insignificance and plain, boring, and empty personality with nothing to offer you. Seems as though time isn't necessarily always a healing factor for all, and for me it's certainly more of a time-bomb ticking away rather than a clock. Because as those hands continue to turn, day by day, my acceptance level of my own worthlessness continues to grow.. until the day that bomb finally explodes. Anyway, dark & suicidal themes and thoughts aside (I can assure you and trust that they will remain that way), she also is restarting soccer, or as she calls it, futsal tonight. Late game. You go, goal scorer - all the best. I miss you - and it's sucks that we're slipping away from each other.. but good for you, cutie. That team is lucky to have you on their side, like I once did. Speaking of this absolutely sucky situation of mine (I mean it's all I talk about after all), reflecting back to a work moment today where I conversed with my own previous (and favourite) team leader regarding this general subject. When I say conversed with her, I mean ranted to her and had a 12-year-old salt-spree about love and marriage, and everything I essentially wanted all being an absolute sham, and not being an existing reality for anyone in any situation (thankfully she understands my current circumstances and more importantly, my sense of humour - I'm not purposely a dick to other people, come on). Though I was having a light hearted kid-around about the subject, I started to detach a bit from the simple fairytale of love, and love as a concept at all - as when spoken aloud - you can't help but question the reality further. That maybe such a simple idea such as true love doesn't really exist at all. People just have temporary moments of ultra joy, and well, that's about it. It's just a stupid concept we made up to explain such non-lasting behaviour or feelings. Oh if only I could ever believe any of it - it'd make life so much simpler, wouldn't it? But I can't. She's a constant living proof and reminder to me that true love does exist. And furthermore, it's worth every bit of pain and suffering - before, during, and even after. Her smile is all that matters. Also, I have a wedding to officiate tomorrow evening, so I should probably stop having a tantrum about my own failed love life. At least I can continue to bind others together, even if I'm ultimately left behind on my own.

[priscillaravenclaw]

70 questions game! tagged by @wheeinthighs thanks cutie!!  💖

i tag @doomtotheuniverse, @anothercallowaysister

1: DO YOU HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENTS? yes, more or less. i do love them dearly

2: WHO DID YOU LAST SAY “I LOVE YOU” TO? man i don’t remember. probably a family member

3: DO YOU REGRET ANYTHING? mmh yeah. i honestly wish i could erase the memories some ppl have of me because i opened up too easily

4: ARE YOU INSECURE? yes.

5: WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP STATUS? gnrfifniwnjcjnk why you gotta come for me like that. single

6: HOW DO YOU WANT TO DIE? the thought of death kind of triggers something bad in my brain so i wont answer this one

7: WHAT DID YOU LAST EAT? plum sorbet.

8: PLAYED ANY SPORTS? no. i hate sports and i hate the fact that i have 3 hours of p.e. class every goddamn week

9: DO YOU BITE YOUR NAILS? not anymore.

10: WHEN WAS YOUR LAST PHYSICAL FIGHT? i have never really fought… i just try to w my classmates sometimes when im drunk

11: DO YOU LIKE SOMEONE? no.

12: HAVE YOU EVER STAYED UP 48 HOURS? not that i remember.

13: DO YOU HATE ANYONE AT THE MOMENT? no, but some ppl do get on my nerves.

14: DO YOU MISS SOMEONE? no, at least not really. just when i remember the good ol’ days

15: HAVE ANY PETS? yes!! two cats, felix and salem

16: HOW EXACTLY ARE YOU FEELING AT THE MOMENT? im tired, lonely and kinda annoyed but i dont know why gnfnpiwbgb

17: EVER MADE OUT IN THE BATHROOM? no :(

18: ARE YOU SCARED OF SPIDERS? no!! im usually the one who takes care of them when my arachnophobic friend spots one

19: WOULD YOU GO BACK IN TIME IF YOU WERE GIVEN THE CHANCE? no. i know i dont have the power to change anything 

20: WHERE WAS THE LAST PLACE YOU SNOGGED SOMEONE? i dont know what this means what

21: WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS FOR THIS WEEKEND? i’ll work a bit and then i’ll go out to celebrate my sisters bday w my family!! also i have to watch lion and prepare myself mentally to face the long ass oscars night

22: DO YOU WANT TO HAVE KIDS? yes, a few. idk why

23: DO YOU HAVE PIERCINGS? a tragus and a helix

24: WHAT IS/ARE/WERE YOUR BEST SUBJECT(S)? english and italian.

25: DO YOU MISS ANYONE FROM YOUR PAST? kinda. my grandma and my childhood bestfriend 

26: WHAT ARE YOU CRAVING RIGHT NOW? affection ((i need a gf))

27: HAVE YOU EVER BROKEN SOMEONE’S HEART? idk??

28: HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CHEATED ON? nope

29: HAVE YOU MADE A BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND CRY? nope

30: WHATS IRRITATING YOU RIGHT NOW? i honestly dont know…. i just know im irritated

31: DOES SOMEBODY LOVE YOU? i hope so lmao

32: WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOR? purple, any shade of it. baby blue and pastel pink too

33: DO YOU HAVE TRUST ISSUES? yes.

34: WHO/WHAT WAS YOUR LAST DREAM ABOUT? i dont remember exactly but i know for sure it was some weird shit bc when i sleep on the bus i usually make some odd ass dreams

35: WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU CRIED IN FRONT OF? my sister when we where watching goblin gnjngjjbfwhrfwfb

36: DO YOU GIVE OUT SECOND CHANCES TOO EASILY? yes. i need to stop doing that.

37: IS IT EASIER TO FORGIVE OR FORGET? forgive for sure.

38: IS THIS YEAR THE BEST YEAR OF YOUR LIFE? idk yet!! we’ll see

39: HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU HAD YOUR FIRST KISS? 17

40: HAVE YOU EVER WALKED OUTSIDE COMPLETELY NAKED? no id die

51: FAVOURITE FOOD? spaghetti with clams!! i lov them. also my grandmas chicken wings and my grandpas pork ribs

52: DO YOU BELIEVE EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON? mmh no not really

53: WHAT IS THE LAST THING YOU DID BEFORE YOU WENT TO BED LAST NIGHT? i watched some youtube videos… probably of red velvet

54: IS CHEATING EVER OKAY? no.

55: ARE YOU MEAN? i surely hope im not

56: HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU FIST FOUGHT? 0 lmao

57: DO YOU BELIEVE IN TRUE LOVE? maybe? idk ive never been in love and ive never met someone who has found their true love

58: FAVOURITE WEATHER? when it storms. thats my shit. or when its sunny but not too hot, and i can lay on the grass feeling all warm and fuzzy

59: DO YOU LIKE THE SNOW? only when im home and i can look at it through the window. OR during snowball fights

60: DO YOU WANNA GET MARRIED? uhm i think eventually. if i find someone i really want to spend the rest of my life with.

61: IS IT CUTE WHEN A BOY/GIRL CALLS YOU BABY? if i like them (even as friends) yes i melt immediately. otherwise i find it creepy

62: WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY? learning and understanding new stuff, girls, nice ass books, tv shows & movies. basically anything w a good storyline. being appreciated!!

63: WOULD YOU CHANGE YOUR NAME? no

64: WOULD IT BE HARD TO KISS THE LAST PERSON YOU KISSED? not if i were drunk gnjfjwfblw. but if id do it when im sober then yes, very.

65: YOUR BEST FRIEND OF THE OPPOSITE SEX LIKES YOU, WHAT DO YOU DO? bitch i run. i dunno how to handle these kind of situations.

66: DO YOU HAVE A FRIEND OF THE OPPOSITE SEX WHO YOU CAN ACT YOUR COMPLETE SELF AROUND? mh kinda. he doesn’t approve of some things i do but who cares gnjfnrcnjd im old enough to drink and not regret it.

67: WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON OF THE OPPOSITE SEX YOU TALKED TO? my friend

68: WHO’S THE LAST PERSON YOU HAD A DEEP CONVERSATION WITH? i THINK one of my classmates. but since we were talking abt him idk if it counts. last time i confessed deep stuff abt myself was w a friend.

69: DO YOU BELIEVE IN SOULMATES? i believe in all kinds of soulmates

70: IS THERE ANYONE YOU WOULD DIE FOR? the people i love.

#things i'm tagged in #sorry this is so late gndndjb