currently thinking about when you let kim know you found out about the pale while he was gone, and that if you tell him its terrifying hes like "so trying to spare you from it was a good idea", or that if you tell him its unreal he says how a lot of things are unreal, or that if you ask him where you are he says they are in elysium, but that all of them involve him comparing the pale to water, death, and "the fact we are all stuck behind our eyes, between our ears, talking for all eternity, like every other human being". and then saying heavy topics are not his forte and acting as if he never said that. you cant just say "heavy topics are not my forte" after dropping that. both the caring and trying to protect harry, and that water, death, and having a mind is terrifying/unreal/just how the world is...
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Really fascinated by the focus on base destruction this series? It always happens, but it's normally collateral when they're trying to kill or it's arson.
But this season there's a concerted effort to destroy entire structures. Scott destroying Skizz's meeting room, the bombings of TIES tower, and the complete destruction of Bread Bridge- these aren't normally how things work. Yes griefing and theft are always technically allowed, but they don't normally happen like this.
Imo this is the most escalated this series has been since 3L. People have always been willing to play a bit of murder chicken, but there were multiple times this session where people got very close to killing each other, intentionally, when they aren't supposed to
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I’d have to imagine that both Ryan and Min-Gi grew up poor, the Akagis being a big family that struggles to accommodate for 5 children, the Parks being first generation immigrants who struggled to find jobs in a mostly white country. Ryan was the kind of kid who would feel frustration with his financial situation, but he learned to work with what he had and not complain because it’s not like him being upset would fix anything, right? Then Min-Gi had the bulk of the burden thrust onto him because he was at a greater advantage than he parents, being a born Canadian citizen and all. He was made to work himself to the bone to not only be independent for himself, but to help his family too. He carried the stress of his family on his back his entire life, so allowing himself to be selfish and pursue his own happiness over financial stability is something he’s just not allowed to think of at all. Meanwhile Ryan, while not financially stable, still can feel more at ease about taking the leap of faith because he’s never had to be the sole provider for his family. He’s allowed to be the disappointing son, he’s expected to be, and while he’s definitely not okay with that, it definitely explains why he isn’t looking at running away with the same fear that Min-Gi is
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Hey babes, sorry I've been dead, but I coulda been literally dead if I had not gone.
I didn't hurt myself and we're still figuring things out. I would love to share but I've already forgotten what I've learned. I hope I get more guidance and time for healing and learning on how to lead my life in a better direction than where I was. But that takes time and effort.
I hope to get some rest, get some support, and get it together. But right now, I don't think it's healthy for me to worry about art in the way I do now. I may not express it here, but trying to maintain my art endeavors/projects while there's so much bullshit going on backstage is not helping me. Especially since I'm not even obligated to do so. But trying to force myself to do something I am currently unable to do will just make me feel worse. I'll follow my dreams and passions one day, but I've been putting off the healing process for years.
So I guess it's better to get better now so I can get the ball rolling again. Why drive on a flat tire?
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