acc been hating the feeling of being a little drunk but not really it feels like shit
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I’m digging myself a hole, and I’m never coming out.
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is anyone else fucking sick of being plagued by pilk and cookies or are you guys getting normaler ads
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The morning after having two drinks and being in your 30's ...
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tired of the obsession with "ethical" vampires and also "good" vampires who don't eat.
i think there's a lot to be said about fatphobia and the glamorization of EDs in vampire media, particularly in more modern depictions... i don't want to place the blame solely on twilight because this was happening way before the 2000s but i do think that had a huge impact with meyer's weird obsession and unwillingness to depict the vampires as anything other than thin and pale (and her singular fat aka tall and curvy vampire is described as "intensely feminine" and we don't have time to unpack all of that in this post)
saying that vampire venom "melts the fat" off of people, or that the vampire venom turns a person into their "ideal self" - who is the one saying my ideal self would be skinny? why is that the ideal at all?
i also just find it soooo fucking boring to neuter your vampires in this way. the whole point is to explore these deep desires and impulses and especially in romance these power imbalances that come from human/vampire relationships. i find the "good" vampire to be such a cop out. why even make them a vampire. twc vampires are just glorified super soldiers that work for the government. twilight vampires are just a bunch of mormon models. there's no real substance to them. even if you wanted to make an argument about edward, it falls flat because stephanie meyer doesn't write him intentionally, she genuinely thinks this shit is romantic & isn't ever really interested in exploring their age gap or edward's hunger.
i think interview with the vampire (the show) approaches the "good" vampire in an interesting way with louis. the decision to make him a gay black man adds so much to his desire to be "good" (accepted) and there's more to it than just him not wanting to eat humans; he's worried about the way the world will perceive him. and he still has so much love for claudia despite how different they are and the things she's done (but ultimately he still chooses lestat over her!!!) and he tries to influence daniel's perception of her, too. i also like that they still actually show him eating, versus the cullens, who i don't ever recall being shown on screen (or in the book) eating anything.
when i write about the hunger in blood choke, i worried about how people would react to the hunting scenes in ch2. overall, way more positively than i expected. there's a lot more i want to expand on especially in the next chapter, and i worry about how it may look right now in the game's unfinished state. i don't want the hunger to be something bad, at least not at its core. everyone is hungry. everyone eats. and i wanted to make it so the vampires in my world could not just opt out of it. they can't eat animals, they can't sustain on blood alone, they have to eat.
when it comes to the mc, they struggle with the hunger, but it's more than that. like with louis, it's the combination of that visceral hunger but also being gay and gender nonconforming, someone who has always been an outcast in society struggling to find their way back in after having their memories and sense of self completely wiped clean. their hunger is a manifestation of this idea they have of their past self - the potential for them to become the next Standard - and their physical/sexual desire that they repressed for so long now untethered due to their lack of memories as well as waking up in a more accepting world.
i think this is a much more interesting way to approach the hunger as opposed to painting the actual act of eating as inherently evil. in twilight, all the good vampires don't eat, even when bella is a human she doesn't eat. in dracula, lucy is only ever good when she doesn't eat. and when she does eat, she becomes an evil, indulgent sexual demon that is a threat to all men and she has to be destroyed.
female vampires always get the worst of it; they are sexual deviants, they want to kill all men, they asked for it, they're disgusting and vile for desiring anything from food to sex to independence. this of course goes way back; again, look at lucy. even in more "progressive" vampire media like bit, the lesbian vampire is evil, hates all men, and is tricking and seducing her female companions into it.
it's interesting to see how far back these trends go. dracula and carmilla all the way up to the modern depictions today. the "good" vampire narrative almost never works; i think because the idea of what is "good" is always going to be influenced by the person creating it. edward is not a "good" vampire. he is a 108 year old man who preys on a teenage girl; this should have been far more important to his character than whether or not he, as a vampire, drinks human blood. but instead he's considered good because he only eats deer and he's skinny and white and looks like a model, and because stephanie meyer says he is.
i don't write all this to say that these topics can't be explored (twilight is terrible for many other reasons, and i think iwtv does do it well) but just to point out why, in my opinion, the "good" vampire is usually such a weak narrative. who decides what is good? and there are other ways to explore the themes of desire and humanity than just restricting their diet... just because your vampire doesn't eat humans does not make them automatically good. and to be frank no vampire will ever be ethical!!! that's the point!!!!
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