#im exhausted folks

[honeybyte]

got a lot of shit goin on

#wip wip wip wip wip wip wip wip #wip #im exhausted folks #but by god i will finish at least one of these

[trainingdummyrabbit]

god actually. continuing off that last post, the thing that really helped draw me into ruinacorp to begin with Was the fact that there was little to no focus on romantic or sexual attractiveness or thematics. like... not in a ">:) hehe im being so subversive look at me you expected??? me to talk about sex??? well im NOT haha." it just straight up. doesnt fucking mention it At All. not a hint. any character that Is in a relationship simply... Is. its still uncommon, anyhow. and even if there Is that pre-established relationship, theyre still like... people? theyre just people about it.

the only time it really Is is with roland, and thats only when hes being a little shit and teasing people On Purpose. otherwise? no baity remarks, no weird implications. just people. and like, the horrors, but still. people. even in th community too, (at least on tumblr iguess, i dont go anywhere else,) theres just. not a huge focus on ship content with the cast. and even when it is, it feels a lot more comfortable than some other circles ive been around in. like. yknow. Man(tm).

#and like!! im not Opposed to ship content; is the thing! its just i can only see so many takes of #'characters looked at each other once theyre sooo in love and [explicit comment] [explicit comment] [explicit comment]' #before i start getting; what the cool kids call; Kind Of Bitter. KJDNGD #piktalk #projmoon #(asterisk also the angela thing aside bc i dont think i need to explain that either end asterisk) #n like. god. i dont dislike limbus from a story standpoint (<- asterisk still hasnt finished) but thats kinda why its been such like. #a hard transition? bc it certainly still isnt as egregious as other circles but i look at some of th pull art and. hmmrmm. #and then the. horrors. but i dont need to like... right? right. #and that extends to the Limbus Only circles too where like. god youre all probably super nice n stuff but like #i am an Entirely different brand of person and it is showing Painfully in some of th stuff i hear. scared of some of these folks. rahh. #anyway. mild complaining aside. again. not opposed; shrimply exhausted. and picky. yip o7

[quarterprioritymidnight]

some silly little pictures of my silly little band over the past week ❤️

#personal #bastille #my run of shows is over now folks 😔 #my wallet is so empty but my heart is so full #this tour felt so special idk how to explain it #i am so exhausted but it was so worth it #and i was so lucky like i was second/third row for most shows and i only queued for threeish hours at two shows??? #and dan came right by me during happier twice like??? #im getting better he's not as scary to me now #this photoset is just dan smith slowly advancing lmao #@ the band bastille let me tour with u and take pictures i am literally always free

[greyeyedmonster-18]

(idk when the world decided that hooded eyes were like, not the vibe, because once upon a time they were called sleepy sexy bedroom eyes and last i checked gigi fuckin hadid and blake lively have hooded eyes and—-?????)

#im ancient #so my media feed is all about plastic surgery now #and was listening to pretty isnt pretty by olivia rodrigo #and its like it never fucking ends #like youre young and glowing but its about getting rid of baby fat in your face #or the cheekbones #and then youre old enough to have cheekbones #but now theres wrinkles #and when does it end #and even the pretty folks #are told theyre not pretty #and being a woman is exhausting the end

[bogkeep]

i saw the hunger games prequel movie last night! i haven't read the book for it but i thought it was pretty good, especially the first part. i have a lot of fond memories from the heyday of the hunger games trilogy, so it was exciting and nostalgic to have a new experience.

that said 2 hours and 37 minutes is a RIDICULOUS runtime. remember when movies used to be 90 minutes

#i think the hunger games were the first books i read on kindle #and i went to all the midnight premieres i think #i had a mockingjay from a popcorn box on my locker at school #(until it disappeared and it was a Whole Thing) #i played an extra (and also foxface) in a local cosplayer's parody videos #actually during one of the premieres i was dressed as a capitol person and drew winners for a lottery #GOOD TIMES #i havent read the prequel book bc i wasn't sure how i felt about having the Backstory Of The Antagonist #especially not if it was gonna be about some doomed romance #but as it turns out it's actually very interesting worldbuilding bc it goes to the early days of the hunger games #and also there's folk music <3 #the hunger games is a really good series actually. it knows what it's about #the YA dystopia genre has a Reputation for sure but the problem it has is bc they like the aesthetics of dystopia #and make up things to be dystopic about. which is a risky move #i think sarah z made a whole video on that it's good #i just. now that time has passed i have more of an appreciation for the hunger games and how good those books are #im having Feelings about things but im so so so exhausted i can't word things rn #it's like. it's a story about propaganda. and how the revolution sings.

[loserchildhotpants]

so many annoying takes today on all social media platforms what is in the water

#super sad when a mutual is like #‘freaks DNI’ #‘if you [engage in fiction in some specific way] fucking block me!!’ #‘if u ship [x] literally unfollow me 🤢’ #like okay i will #didn’t know u were a Thought Cop here to measure my morals by what media i consume rather than like my character and deeds #im Like 30 or 40 And do Not need this lol #new age fandom Puritanism is fucking exhausting #i have that old school fandom mindset too like i keep showing up to functions at the fandom ymca #and im making friends and sharing my homemade cookies and having a fine time #and then someone is loudly like ‘if u use ur imagination in the wrong way gtfo’ #it used to be so much easier to make friends in fandom now i get daily jumpscares by folks unthinkingly touting neo christo-fascist shit #melanie lives #I’ll just go offline today maybe #ugh

[agayconcept]

if anyone has a few spare dollars to help a disabled trans person travel to a doctor for care that's been systematically denied to them (!!) it would help a lot ♡

this situation has become urgent & i have no other way to cover the costs- i'm unable to work & do not receive any assistance with transportation. i really need help in order to access the treatment i need (which at this point is considered life-saving).

☆ my friend helped me set up a donation page bc i don't have reliable access to technology rn ⬆️ (link is above & here)

reblogs also help, tysm !! 🏳️‍⚧️

#boost #transphobia mention #my doctors office has simply cut off all communication at this point. so i cannot acces /any/ healthcare thru them #(yes a report is in the works. it takes Forever.) #anyway ive been on the phone w almost every other provider of hrt / gender affirming healthcare and am on all the wait lists #but am working to find something i can access before the next calendar year #and that will require me to travel p far and i simply Do Not have the $ to do so #especially bc the reason im not on disability ?? my doctors office was supposed to finish my application. they've ghosted me. so idfk #what will happen w that #🤦‍♂️ #*access #im too exhausted to go back and correct my typos. u get what u get sorry folks #i am at any given moment 3 days into an insomniatic anxiety riddled dissociative episode. i cannot be held accountable for my grammar

[cosmic-kaden]

I can't... Not again... Please just looking at this brings me close to tears please no more... I can't deal with it again

I retract my statement. I am crying over this.

#this post is entirely serious #im exhausted still from the first one this morning- just i dont have proper distractions here. i can't listen to loud music or else #folks get pissed. they think my phobia is a joke. im distressed rn and it hasn't even started #vent.tw #storms;

[savage-rhi]

✨️Magenta🔥

#looking at the mental health and therapy positions open in my area #therapists are leaving left and right that a clinic i used to work at that treated me like utter shit is almost offering 140k in salary #to keep folks retained #i remember just a few years ago the max a therapist made there was 75k #seeing other places too where its like 67 to 85 an hr with sign on bonuses upward to 5k #its not a good sign professionals are leaving in droves #but damn it do i wish i had my license already so i could hop on and not live in poverty for a hot minute #im not fooling myself based on how inflation and the economy is running if you make over 100k its gonna be like making less than 45k #cause we getting gutted #but still god damn it #i got 2 and a half more years to go #fuck if i made that much right now i could get out of debt and spend a good chunk on people that need it #cause i don't need much else to keep my ass happy #this is the little flag that gives me hope #I'll be able to make a living doing something i love and helping people and getting my damn fucking bread #if i could make a living full time writing tho that would be fucking amazing #same thing with my voice over stuff too #god theres so much i aspire to do i got the ambition for it alright #but i got the disability that makes me take ten steps back and i live in a capitalistic hellscape that wants me tired and exhausted to where #i can't accomplish anything else but keeping the machine going #i feel like my writing sucks lately thats probably just burnout but god damn #this got bleak #k magenta can go fuck itself lets reword this jay #you're gonna get your license you're gonna have SOME FUCKING STABILITY you're gonna help people you're gonna be content and #you're gonna get your mother fucking bread that you've been promised #magenta mother fuckers magenta

[ronkeyroo]

Returning briefly before Art Fight begins to remind my moots i'll be attending this year, if you wanna have some artsty fun together! Its the one event I allow myself to fully indulge in no matter the mess im under at the moment. So yeah! Feel free to add me up, if you want to clash penswords ⚔️ ✏️ Its launching tomorrow!!!!!!!

#ive been so so busy with work trying to cover the massive expenses this month that i didnt get a moment to even breathe properly... #forgive me if ive been hard to catch this month because of it ;; Im emotionally and physically exhausted and im working on it #i keep missing out on folks because im barely even around tumblr nowdays so hopefully this could be a fun pickme up ;_; #despite the mind fog and persisting numbness...im actually feeling the spark of excitement #Art Fight

[sycopomp]

Question, no pressure involved, is there a chapter 2 for OOIE in the works? ((Munching on chapter 1 (again)))

Friend did u miss the part where im in the hospital and literally can't even walk rn

Like cmon, u couldn't have waited a few weeks to send this? or checked the tag for the last time i was asked?

#im too exhausted to even be mad #went to read the lovely messages i got from folks wishing me to get better #and saw this lmaoo #sighs into hands #god i could never be famous lmfao id hate it #and no im not taking this time im bedridden to write fanfic for yall #im taking this time to rest and take care of my mental health #which understandably took a massive nosedive during this traumatic experience #anyway #a patient threw a stool at a nurse tonight #that was fun #goodnight

[sparring-spirals]

have i walked back in on ashton giving laudna advice?

.... is laudna just making her rounds around the bells to ask for advice?

-oh FEARNE is here now, so i guess its happening whether she wants it to or not-

#of all the episodes for me to miss huge chunks of... THIS ONE... #critical role #cr spoilers #cr liveblogging #ashton #laudna #oh man wh at #c3e25 #spar speaks #folks im mildly loopy with exhaustion but i AM going to watch this rerun i swear to god.

[going2go-away4-awhile]

I got to see my fave folk singer live 😭😭😭!!!!

#odie leigh #concert #folk music #im exhausted #10 hour car ride was worth it thou 🙌

[blow-me-a-kis]

I'll tell you one thing I learned from dropping out that most ppl who champion their college experience struggle to comprehend: Ppl who don't do college traditionally or at all are worthy of respect and have their own valuable, meaningful, and transformative life experiences.

Going away to college isn't the only way to grow up, experience new things, or meet ppl from all walks of life. College isn't for everyone. Formal education isn't for everyone. Its not open minded or mature to judge anyone for lacking The College Experience or college aspirations.

#anyway just had the most exhausting conversation with some folks #going on and on about how college opened their mind and made them sooo grown up #and then they laughed at the idea of someone attending college and becoming a manager at a retail store?? #like?? a man has a job whats funny?? #if the college experience is to turn you into a judgey class traitor ass clown then Im glad I skipped it