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passionate-hedgehog · 7 years

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I Love You

A/N: @baerrylll gave me my first prompt request and I hope it’s deemed well! It came easier to me than I thought. Y’all were quick with the requests which is MAGICAL. The other ones will be up shortly! It completely obliterated my indents so bare with that. This is unbeta'd (THANK YOU GRAMMARLY!!)

Prompts #11 -His eyes were cold and lifeless as he stared at me. “You have no idea who I am, do you?” and #27- “You love her don’t you?” “Is it that obvious?”

When Spencer called, two and a half weeks after meeting you, signs weren't exactly pointing towards a date. Sure, you guys hit it off when you were introduced but then it was radio silence. You weren’t totally offended but it also wasn’t the best feeling. He was cute and sweet and the conversation was wholly different from anything else you’ve ever experienced.

Maybe that was it? Maybe the conversation wasn’t fulfilling to him. You knew right off the bat that he was a force to be reckoned with, intellectually. He could have spent the entire group dinner talking about theories and psychologists but when you spoke? His eyes never left you. Maybe it wasn’t the conversation.

Maybe it was the job difference. Your best friend Rachel had mentioned something about her favorite cousin being a federal agent, FBI you later deduced, and you were not. You were a DSS and proud of it. You weren’t out there chasing bad guys or investigating murders, but your work was hard and fulfilling. You couldn’t imagine doing anything else.

When the first date turned into a second date, which turned quickly into a third and a fourth and half of a fifth (weather, man.), you came to the conclusion that this could be it. He could be it, The One. At least you had hoped. It took some work but you got along with his team and you knew better than to ask about case specifics. He, in turn, knew better than to ask about your residents. He understood HIPAA and the other laws that permitted you to discuss the finer details about your exact work life.

Formal dates turned into casual get-togethers with his team, or your friends/ co-workers, or just the two of you. You both were at your happiest when sweats and movies were involved. Although, when he would read his favorite poetry to you it was pretty incredible. Likewise for when you would convince him to do some volunteer work at the local cat shelter. The way he looked at you, you just knew.

The home you worked for prided itself on being someplace safe for not only it’s residents but also it’s co-workers, after all, everyone was family. So when it came time for a “family party” (monthly staff meeting that involved you getting your paycheck a few days early) it wasn’t a complete surprise when the conversation turned itself on you. Everyone was still arriving when Cassie, she was 7 months your work senior, sat next to you on the living room sofa with a mug of s’more flavored coffee. She looked a little tired but that’s what happened when you worked full-time, went to school, and had a 3-year-old.

“Heard you had a date last night. What’s that make your total this month? 4?” She asked as she ran her hand through her short chocolate hair as she got comfortable.

You faintly blushed and gave a soft smile. “Yeah. Something like that.”

Melanie, Cassie’s best friend, and fellow 3rd-shifter sat on the sofa, putting Cassie in the middle. “Ooh. Do tell. Where did you guys go this time? Or did you stay in? Hmmm?”

You giggled at your friend’s shenanigans. “No, we went out. His co-workers had told him about this hibachi and he wanted to try it out. So we did. It wasn’t planned. We just really wanted sushi and steak.”

“Look at you guys going on random dates. Going somewhere just because. It’s like Y'all are married or something.” Cassie sipped from her drink.

“Almost.” Melanie winked.

The conversation died down, and the meeting started, but your mind had a hard time straying from what the girls had said, insinuated. You hadn’t even told him you loved him yet, but you couldn’t figure out why. What was stopping you?

You made it home safely from the meeting and decided to settle in for a nap. You’d eventually realize why you had a hard time saying things to Spencer that would make him stay absolutely, make your relationship so concrete.

The dream started like it always did; you were trying to travel somewhere far and you were running late for whatever mode of transportation was going to get you there. It changed, then. Taking the Megabus to the train station turned into taking an unidentifiable convoy to an unidentifiable place. Fear started to settle in you, and for good reason. All of a sudden you couldn’t recognize who was in the vehicle with you, or the passing outside. It was farmland but that quickly turned into a bridge being surrounded by water and that’s when it kicked in. That’s when your aquaphobia made itself known. You weren't even touching the water and it had already begun to feel Ike the air was leaving your lungs.

“Where are we going?” You managed to squeak out.

No one responded. No one turned their heads to look at you. Lemmings, you thought.

“Can anyone hear me?”

Someone sitting behind the driver, a man, began to turn his head around. It moved so slowly, at some point you were concerned about how far he’d turn it. What was he, an owl?

The two of you made eye contact but he didn’t blink, didn’t talk. It was almost like he wasn’t even breathing. But his eyes never left yours. They almost had a familiar feel to them, but eerie. The way he wasn’t blinking definitely wasn't helping.

Then he stood up.

The man turned so he was still within his seat space but his whole body was facing you, You couldn’t quite see his clothes or all the features on is face but you could make out the eyes and the emotion they held.

No, They didn’t hold emotion. Nothing in him held emotion, of this you could tell. You could sense overwhelming dread as he made his way to the aisle of the bus you were still on, that was still going down the road. He was coming right for you but you couldn’t move, couldn’t get up, not that you had anywhere you could go anyway. He stopped right in front of your seat.

You swallowed and tried to move towards the window but he grabbed your wrist and held it tight. Oh yeah, you weren’t going anywhere anytime soon. It didn’t help that he had a tight grip, maybe even cutting off your circulation. You still couldn’t look away.

His eyes were cold and lifeless as he stared at you. “You have no idea who I am, do you?”

You inhaled sharply and his grip somehow increased. But that’s when you saw it.

This is it, you thought. This is where I leave Spencer, and I’ll never be able to see or talk or touch him again. No! He doesn’t even know I love him!

“Let me go!” You yelled and squirmed, but his hand wouldn’t release you. “I have to tell Spencer! I won’t be like you! I need to tell him!”

You took a sharp and haggard breath as you sat up. You were in your bed, under your own sheets. After grasping reality, you ran your hands over your face and counted backward from 10. Numbers helped, sometimes. Numbers and food.

Your stomach growling led you to swing your legs over the side of the bed and out of the bedroom. Before you made it ten steps, you could hear his voice coming from the kitchen talking to someone else. When you didn’t hear anyone else, you deduced that Spencer was on the phone. You decided to eavesdrop, give your heart some more time to let up on the hammering.

“I’m sure, Morgan.” A brief pause as you heard him clinking around in the cupboards.

“Yeah, she was upstairs taking a nap when I got in. I figured a quick cup of coffee would suffice and a sticky note. I probably won’t even wake her.” Water running, most likely into the coffee pot to fill the filter.

A shattering of glass was heard before you heard your boyfriend briefly swear. “And that was my favorite mug. Darn it.”

“You breaking her things, man?” Derek’s voice could be heard, he must have put his phone on speaker to clean up the mess.

“It was an accident. I loved this mug. The coffee never got cold, like magic.”

“If you believed in magic. What’s the total damage, anyway? You basically live there. It could be considered your mug.”

Spencer sighed. “Yeah that sounds good on paper, but it’s not my property. It’s hers. I like to respect it as I respect her.”

“By dropping it on the linoleum?” The other man chuckled.

“It was an accident. Besides...I’d never want to drop Leah or hurt her.” Then Spencer gave an almost whisper. “She’s everything to me.”

“You really love her, don’t you?”

“Is it that obvious?” A smack could be heard. “Don’t answer that. I know it is. I want it to be. I-I want...”

“What, Reid? What do you want?”

“I want- I want to be able to tell her that.”

“You haven’t!? She doesn’t know? You mean to tell me that you’ve been seeing each other for almost half a year and you’re basically living in her house, and you haven’t even said ‘I love you’ yet!?”

“Aw, Derek. I didn't know you felt that way.”

“SPENCER!”

“I know I’m sorry! I-I just… I don’t… I...” He took a deep breath. “I know it’s unlikely but she hasn’t said it either so there’s always a chance that she doesn’t feel the same way. I don’t want the thought that all of this has been for nothing. If I say it and it’s not reciprocated then...then it’ll destroy me.”

“Listen to me when I tell you that you have nothing to be worried about. Y/N loves you just as much as you love her. There’s nothing to fear there, man. Just say it.”

Taking the matter into your own hands, you walk around the wall separating the hallway and the kitchen. You walk up to your unsuspecting boyfriend and grab his face, pushing your lips against his.

“I love you, Spencer. Always.”

He didn’t dare do anything besides blink and if your heart weren’t still hammering from the dream and everything that followed you would have giggled at his dumbfound expression.

“Well, that’s my cue. Thank God.” Derek said his goodbyes and then hung up.

Your eyes never left Spencer, and his eyes never left you.

“I love you, too.” At that, he grabbed your waist and pulled your lips back on to his.

#spencer reid #dr spencer reid #spencer reid imagine #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds imagine #derek morgan #matthew gray gubler #mgg x reader #sr.imagines

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