#idk if this needs a negativity tag or not but i’ll add one just in case

[sobuildabeautifulcity]

Your disappointment warrants a disclaimer though, otherwise you're seeding a certain sentiment a lot of trolls and shill are trying to whip up. Don't be that person who thinks writers and actors owe you endless content for less than a living wage.

i respect your opinion and you’re not strictly incorrect but… thats not my point lol & you’ve kinda proved my issue.

the main part of my thoughts was that i have an issue with, and i quote: not being able to post when you’re experiencing multiple conflicting feelings without explaining all of them without being attacked.

it’s not only about the strikes, it’s anything that someone thinks you cant have complicated emotions towards if you don’t explicitly say so. my example was about the strikes because thats the most recent thing i’ve seen, but it’s more than that. not allowing people to express only their negative feelings in their own space online, simply because it might overlap with people being dicks intentionally about it isn’t the right way to go about it. for example, saying you’re disappointed because your favourite band pushed back their album release doesn’t mean you’re not sympathetic to the fact they delayed it due to health issues, it just means you’re disappointed because you were excited about it & had planned for it happening on a specific day. you expressing that upset online shouldn’t need to involve a disclaimer, because it should be implied - until proven otherwise - that you care about your band’s wellbeing. if you send a string of posts abusing the band for postponing it, yeh, youre a dick. but if you send one which is ‘aw man this sucks so much we wont get the album’, thats not something you should associate with the people being dicks about it despite it being negative in tone.

idk, i like to assume the best of people rather than thinking they’re dicks & don’t feel a complicated way about things.

if someone expresses disappointment about their plans changing due to something, that doesn’t mean they disagree with the thing that changes their plans? it solely means they are disappointed that their expectations for the coming time period changed & to assume otherwise unless proven only makes your worldview more negative.

this… insistence that all your feelings must be explained entirely and in full in order for you to grumble about something online is exhausting, and unnecessary if you simply assume the best of people. and, quite frankly, it is why i stopped using my tumblr for anything beyond reblogging stuff until recently.

i’ll add a disclaimer here, as well as the one that’s in the tags, bc my point is being proven lol: i support pretty much all unions & their decisions to strike (us police unions are not included hence my ‘pretty much all’). i am 100% sure that the wga & sag aftra should strike & fully support them doing so, shutting down hollywood is a great way to have bargaining power. the conditions they are expected to work under are abhorrent & they need better protection. it is also absurd to say that you can’t express disappointment about things you were looking forward to being cancelled without needing to add a disclaimer that your frustration is aimed at the other side of the negotiations for not capitulating, and not at the sag members. if you are posting your feelings on your blog, you should not need to caveat those feelings. the default of people assuming the worst of others makes the world a worse place.

i have a tendency to over explain my point so that it gets across, and often that means my coherence suffers lol. please bear in mind i am cognitively disabled & severely ill.

#eli’s nightblogging #like i said in my other tags - i am always pro strike #but that support for actors getting appropriate contracts that arent exploitative #does not negate my disappointment that something i anticipated is no longer happening #and that is okay!! #because i am human and can experience multiple feelings at time #this is made even funnier to me by the fact i barely watch tvs/films & when i do its british stuff atm lol #*tv oops #i think i was gonna write tv shows #anon please dont take this as a personal attack - i dont mean to be rude or cruel #im just tired that the assumption is people are acting out of malice rather than just expressing upset #this might be a mish mash because writing this on mobile is hard for my brain & im already in pain that’s making it worse #but hopefully i got my point across #im happy to continue a polite discussion about this #but my opinion hinges on ‘assuming people are complicated and arent being dicks until proven otherwise’ #and im not sure that can be swayed atp lol #if you’re really worried someone’s maybe being a dick then do the mature thing and ask them #even if its ‘hey whats your opinion on the strikes?’ #assuming makes an ass out of you #wish you could edit tags on mobile. urgh. i wrote time above when i meant ‘once’

[hisbutler-problematic]

.･˚*☁︎⁺˚･⋆☾ tags masterlist ☽⋆･˚⁺☁︎*˚･.

❤︎ here is a list so you can block any tags you need to ❤︎

sebaciel is always tagged in my original posts. it is NOT tagged in reblogs

i'm lowkey (highkey 😔) too lazy to comprehensively tag my rbs but i WILL tag that it’s an rb. let me know if there’s anything you need tagged & i’ll try to remember

☁︎ rb.img / rb.txt - reblogged images (pics and gifs) / text posts

☁︎ sky reads bb - it’s like liveblogging (manga) but it’s not live. includes manga screenshots. i can’t guarantee it will be spoiler free

☁︎ sky watches bb - it’s like liveblogging (anime) but it’s not live. these probably won’t have images. warning: i don’t have the highest opinion of the anime (esp the original), so even if i’m not outright negative, there might still be some negative vibes 🫡 gomen 🙏

☁︎ bb anime /neg - i’m being outright negative abt the anime. h8ers gonna h8. or whatever.

☁︎ sky talks - not fandom related posts. answered asks and random thoughts. that kind of thing.

☁︎ sky posting - literally anything i’m the original poster for. if you block this one then genuinely idk what we’re doing here

☁︎ thread - twitter was right about one thing and it was threads. since this is tungle i guess we're gonna have to go w rbs! (aka separate but connected thoughts added in an rb)

☁︎ rb add bc ilu - rb additions of or in response to someone being incredibly correct on my posts

☁︎ blorbo tagging - one we all know! i saw a post, thought of a blorbo

︎☁︎ implied nsfc - (implied nsft/nsfw) “implied not safe for ciel”

☁︎ nsfc - (nsft/nsfw) “not safe for ciel”

☁︎ in this house sebastian is a sub - my original sub!sebastian posts

☁︎ subastian - i have dreams of reblogging sub!sebastian posts too. if i ever do, this is the tag i will use. (will use it also for og sub!seb posts just so they’re all under one tag)

for posts of a deader dove variety i’ll use the tag “dead dove”. i will also tag common cws (if i miss any or you need a specific one let me know)

#tags post #will update as needed #sky talks #sky posting #now that i’ve posted my tags i can finally post 🔞 with a clear conscience 💕 #i didnt get a chance to check the links so let me know if something isnt working #some of the tags are still empty too

[izgetspersonal]

hi it’s izzy!! (main account: @izzyseemsfizzy)

this is just for like. rants and vents and stuff idk, i’ll also post artwork that i like here <3

•

-please refrain from talking about controversial topics (ex: war, politics, religion)

-i use tone tags, and if you don’t want me to around you, let me know. BUT PLEASE do NOT use the /nm tone with me, it fucks with my head.

-please don’t spread hate, especially not here. this is supposed to be a safe place for me to write things.

MAIN TAGS:

izzyrambles: good rambles, like infodumping or smth idk

izzyrants: non-personal, like ranting about a tv show, opinions, etc.

izzyvents: personal vents, usually /neg and involving my head.

izzyart: literally just my art lol

•

intrusive thoughts: any post involving my intrusive thoughts. block this tag if you need to.

izzy interests: relating to my interests

bad brain thoughts: any disturbing thoughts i have have. block this tag if you need to.

izzy cussing: any posts with cussing in them. block this tag if you need to.

discrimination: any type of discrimination mentioned. (ex: ableism, (likely going to be a big one) homophobia, transphobia, racism, etc.) block this tag if you need to.

izzy ocd: relating to my (diagnosed) ocd. block this tag if you need to.

izzy autism: relating to my (suspected) autism. block this tag if you need to.

let me know if i need to add any more tags!!

•

#izzyrambles #izzyrants #izzyvents #izzyart #intrusive thoughts #izzy interests #bad brain thoughts #izzy cussing #discrimination #izzy ocd #izzy autism #INTRODUCTION POST!!!

[everlastingspiral]

hi hi, in your ask ‘cause of a tagged post and wanted to say i disagree about people going on “crusades” when it seems like (unless i missed a post??) people want others to draw/write what they want for the listeners (i do agree the whole ’not *the* listeners, *your* listeners’ thing is silly tho like lol the latter part is implied automatically) but just tag/note so they can decide to engage or not. but anyway, i scrolled your tumblr and found a few things i agreed with (xavier being introduced just to die, the consequences of inversion where 1500 people died not quite being at the level that would be expected of an event like that for major characters, the feeling that all antagonists need to be like 100% bad). it’s the first time (other than a youtube comment here and there) i’ve seen someone be critical even a little of redacted’s work and i’m fascinated lol! i don’t agree with everything on your tumblr lol but but i’m wondering what you would you change about a couple of plots or characters that bother you rn (for me i would chill on the ‘every time alexis is mentioned it’s something immensely negative’ like she can’t be 1000% all bad can she?? there has to be a reason she’s still a major part of the clan and inversion would have taken out a character we actually know maybe or had xavier actually be a major or major supporting character for awhile first; not a writer tho so idk).

I use the term “crusades” from the history of this fandom to get riled up over something very inconsequential, but now that I check again, in my exhausted stupor I mistaked posts from one person for multiple people. I’ll apologize for that at least.

I’m surprised I’ve been having more people on here that don’t act like I want Redacted burned at the stake. I get mad at him sure, but really, it’s not that big of a deal. To be frank most of the things on my “sin list” aren’t things I’m that mad about, it’s more the culmination of them altogether. I’m just venting. Thanks for being so open to conversation. I expected more anon hate when I started posting here, but I digress.

Alright. Anon. You have done it. You have unleashed the floodgates. My third critiquing eye has opened and the planets have aligned. Hell as we know it is freezing over as I type. You have triggered a rant that is far too long and that I had to go back over to add commas in. I guarantee I missed something because that’s how long it went on. I didn’t have any ideas for specific future events in any storyline but I did go over the flaws in his writing, why they were flaws, and how to correct them in the future in a bullet-pointed list. You’re welcome.

Absolutely stop treating Alexis like she’s pure evil. As you’ve said, if it was truly that much of a problem, I don’t understand why the king would keep her around in the first place. The way Sam described his turning also gave me no indication that she turned him out of malice as opposed to concern. She doesn’t need to become a major character, but she needs to stop being brought up as if she’s Adam.

(I’m reading over this response and I want to add that from a character’s point of view of their own trauma, yes, they might 100% villainize and hate whoever caused that trauma. There’s no need for someone to forgive whoever traumatized them that badly, but there’s also a possibility to show a character’s maturity or growth by having them come to an understanding about why someone took the actions against them that they did. For example, I hate the people in my life who have abused me in the past, but I also understand that they were abused themselves, or I was just a person readily available to lash out against. It doesn’t mean I forgive them, the effects of my trauma have been healed, or that their actions were okay. It means I understand that they are people struggling through their own lives like I am. This is a very difficult conclusion to reach but is a remarkable sign of maturity. I’m in no way perfect either and I struggle reaching that point just like anyone else. Just look at my blog, I clearly have anger issues.)

As for other villains, a simple way to portray grey evils is to give them aspects that may be otherwise seen as “good.” They don’t have to be saints, but they may have specific biases you wouldn’t expect of someone bad. To pull up a possible idea for Quinn, perhaps something traumatic happened to him that left him on the streets and he began his nomadic lifestyle in order to help others who also were/feel ostracized from their families. He began helping strays or getting homeless people to shelters and picked up people along the way to help him. That doesn’t sound very “evil” does it? Then we could either have him on a “went mad with power” route, or we could say that the friend of Darlin’s that he killed violated a very personal rule or idea to him, and it resulted in that friend’s death. What was the violated rule or idea? Was it severe enough to justify that friend’s death? This could be as severe as killing someone or being framed for it versus maybe turning their back on a person in need. Was the friend’s death an accident and Quinn ran away without explaining himself, or Darlin’ won’t allow him to?

If attacking Frederick and Bright Eyes was still canon, that alone could be considered a grey area depending on how you go about it. Aside from his trespassing, vampires are made to prey on humans. Is he considered evil for not drinking from them “politely” or is he simply being a vampire and feeding himself? Humans don’t exactly ask for consent when killing wild animals for food, so is what Quinn did much different? That’s a very blurry area that could be debated, and there’s no true “right” answer to it.

This is an example of making a villain “reasonable.” Another I can think of is Vega, who is a compelling character that overstepped his boundaries and twists truths into ugly realities. Demons are also meant to feed on humans, albeit in a different manner, but was it right of him to trap people in an endless cycle of torment for a food source? On the one hand this is resourceful, and on the other this doesn’t take into account his two victims as individuals. His idea is reasonable if you break it down, but the manner he goes about it could be considered going too far, especially as what is established in canon law, which is what makes him a villain. He’s not wrong, but he’s not right either.

As for his more “pure evil” villains, for the love of God, if the fandom doesn’t see a villainous character as pure evil, he doesn’t need to make them worse. Despite how loud a certain portion of the fandom is, it overall was still fairly divided over Kody’s situation. Making a realistic allegory to sexual assault is a very heavy undertaking, and I applaud his desire to want to handle it properly in reference of real life college atmospheres. However, that attempt still failed in the end since about half the fandom didn’t see it as severely as he attempted to make it. Instead of ending this storyline where it seemed to have properly needed to end, he chose to continue it and made Kody be antagonistic where he didn’t need to be in order to make him seem more like an “evil” character. This was not only unnecessary since we already had the Inversion taking place as our major conflict that could break into several smaller conflicts, but it also seemed like a desperate attempt to make up for something he failed to do previously. He should have simply left the plotline alone and forgiven himself for the mistake, learned from where he failed and where he succeeded, and taken that knowledge with him to the next storyline. This same thing goes for incorrectly portraying “good” characters too.

If Redacted decides to have another major event like the Inversion, he needs to remove a major character for it to be impactful. While I would say he should kill them off, he doesn’t necessarily have to if he’s worried about the fandom reaction. Ivan didn’t have to die for his storyline to end. The impact would be heavier if a character died, but he could still “fake” a death and reveal in an Aftershock equivalent that they lived, but there’s some circumstance removing them from the major storyline. I’m not exactly sure if 1500 people can be considered a large or small number since we don’t know how many people were in that situation. However, if it was a large amount, then that number is probably too low, if it was a small amount, then there’s little chance every single major character and listener left that event nearly unscathed.

I said in another post to stop with the “political messages” and I realized later that it wasn’t exactly what I meant to say. Again, venting, my bad. A better way to word it might be “let characters be flawed, make lasting mistakes, suffer consequences for them, and work towards improvement.” He did this more in the beginning, and I genuinely can’t tell you why he might have changed this without making assumptions. In recent history, Redacted has been including talks about consent where they shouldn’t be and immediately covering up any possible conflict between the characters and their listeners. The prime examples I can provide of this, or that made me the most peeved perhaps, are what I added in the list about Geordi and Vincent.

In Geordi’s case, it feels inappropriate to begin his storyline eliminating a potential conflict that would likely be very prevalent with the characters involved. Which for this portion is Geordi and Cutie who’s a telepath. Rather than showcasing the characters and their potential plotline, at least to me it felt like the highlight of his first video was this conversation about “consent” when reading his mind. I’m in no way saying that this is bad, and let me say this for anyone who may happen across this post, I am in no way saying that including discussions about consent or boundaries is a bad thing. It’s more the fact that it was inappropriately placed from a narrative perspective. Anyways, this could have been a building conflict between the two where Cutie kept reading his mind, and maybe even just a video or two down the line, then he comes to them about the consent talk. Redacted could possibly expand on this by having Cutie slip up or put them in situations where they must read Geordi’s thoughts in order to communicate with him when he may not be able to “consent” to it. That could open the door to a major conflict that is readily within reach of the characters and has had prior content to build up to it. In Vincent’s case, Redacted once again threw away an aspect of conflict with Lovely being turned, which was Vincent’s ability to invoke them and lie to them. The king’s ability to remove these being ridiculous aside, this is another situation that could be built on with Vincent learning to control his ability to invoke or simply trying not to lie to Lovely. He could have slipped up in a video where he tells a small lie and apologizes, then tells the full truth. This would have been a much better method of portraying Vincent as caring and trustworthy, and would have probably been more endearing for people to listen to Vincent trying to make Lovely comfortable until telling the truth becomes natural for him. Aside from a conflict where Vincent lies to Lovely about something major happening, such as Quinn hurting Sam or some other major event we may learn about later or through other characters, there’s also the possibility he uses his ability to invoke to save them. The king saved Vincent by forcing him to drink blood, and Vincent could be forced to save Lovely in a similar manner despite his guilt for doing so. It could be making Lovely drink to parallel the moment with Vincent, or it could be something else entirely. Something minor could be making Lovely move if they’re paralyzed in fear, something major could be forcing them to injure or kill someone in self-defense. In both Geordi’s and Vincent’s scenarios, these actions are by no means okay just because their breaking of “consent” or other promises helped someone. That doesn’t mean Cutie or Vincent are villains for taking those actions, they were navigating a situation in a way they best knew how and it got them out of it alive. I’m no expert, but this is how characters, in this case the “good” ones, are generally portrayed as grey. They can still be considered “good” while saving the day in a manner that could be considered “wrong.” Despite my complaints of it, I liken this to Avior’s current situation where he messed up by hiding Starlight’s memory loss from them and is trying his best to explain himself and indirectly promise to better himself from his mistake. (Depending on how Starlight approaches their questioning of him, there’s a 50/50 chance of them forgiving him realistically. If I were in their situation, I would at least need some time away from Avior to think things through, but I again digress.)

These talks of “consent” or being in the “right” have come to my attention specifically because of the inappropriate placement and the elimination of conflict as if to play it safe. I find it difficult to believe that every single vampire in existence has been turned with consent, and delving deeper into that concept opens up a lot of very uncomfortable realities as a result. It’s ludicrous that vampires are somehow absolved of fault by asking a person on the verge of death if they’re willing to completely abandon their old lives in return for having to drink blood, live in the night, and live for eternity, expecting a response made in desperation of survival to be equivalent to consent given with a clear mind. In a way I can understand Sam’s reasoning for having this mindset, and in another I can understand that Lovely is already familiar with the concept of being turned and a vampire’s lifestyle, but these instances don’t come off as characters acting on past experiences or past knowledge. They come off as Redacted saying “consent is important.” Which is a good message, but these situations are far more complicated than simply “obtain consent before doing.”

Similarly, I don’t find Avior calling himself “manipulative” as something that his character would say. He didn’t even seem to act on those past events that happened before Starlight lost their memories to be considered “manipulative”, even from an outside perspective. At most he’s a liar that’s been hiding that fact from them, and that’s how I would expect this character to describe himself as. Maybe this is up for debate, but describing him “manipulating” Starlight as opposed to “lying” to them sounds more like an author’s words than a character that’s in that story, this idea being emphasized by other important but inappropriately placed messages Redacted has made. As for my bit about Frederick’s story being removed, I’ll refrain from talking about the reasoning I mentioned in the list since it’s more of a crude assumption.

Looking over everything again, I can add that if a character has a reliable support system, they shouldn’t be acting like their trauma from 20 years ago happened yesterday. At most, I’ve witnessed people with “resolved” trauma be mildly sensitive to discussing it, and the most sensitive on an “anniversary” of the cause of it. Both Vincent and Sam discussing their trauma sound as if they’ve been alone with no reliable person to help them work through their thoughts and emotions on those events, which makes the king and his clan sound distant and unavailable. The king’s interactions with Vincent as a reliable and supportive mentor, and Vincent and Sam's bond like brothers, feel completely forced when you take into account their reactions to those past events. These topics would undoubtedly have come up at some point and have been talked about with other characters, which would lighten the reaction they would have presently. This is probably the result of certain characters only being added in at a later time, and simply not enough forethought put into how the relationships between these two characters and “background” characters affect how they react to certain past events. In short, a lack of worldbuilding. This is still something Redacted could keep in mind for the future though.

For the last point I believe is a major aspect of Redacted’s to improve, here’s my thoughts on Darlin’s story. It boils down to the fact that Darlin’ in their story is constantly chastised and has their agency removed from them. Them hunting down Quinn’s scent is revealed to be a “blood bond” outside of their control. Sam chastised them for acting on their own and getting hurt as a result, and proceeded to chastise them for not having any food, or otherwise being bad at self-care. (This might be more of a personal opinion, but that particular video felt more to me like Sam was scolding a disobedient teenager than showing passive-aggressive affection for a potential love interest. You can imagine how uncomfortable I felt with the rest of those videos.) David and Sam’s follow-up conversation did not progress Darlin’ and Sam’s relationship. David then chastised Darlin’ for acting on their own and seemed to make it more about himself and the pack than about Darlin’, which again robs Darlin’ of their agency and puts their actions in a bad light. Another way I can put this is that there’s no middle ground conversation for Darlin’s behavior, it’s only them being punished for it like a misbehaving child and they don’t do it again. (Similar to how Bright Eyes was constantly put down with no middle ground, but their storyline was removed before their conflict could be expanded on.) There are no opportunities for Darlin’ to look powerful or independent that aren’t put down by other characters, which renders them being portrayed as horribly incompetent instead.

From a writing standpoint and not an emotional one, this plotline is a train wreck. I would say it’s up to par with other ASMR videos, which render listeners incredibly stupid and lacking any sort of agency, but I expect more from Redacted given every other listener he’s created. While not entirely in control, they still have a good amount of control over their narratives, which makes them more solid as individual characters. The fact that the fandom still takes away the idea that Darlin’ is powerful I would chalk up to their fascination with the idea of the character, and the emotional “manipulation” of hearing the characters’ voices, which is a far different experience from analyzing the story writing itself. I will admit, Redacted is a fairly good voice actor.

As for all my other points, I would say those are more trial and error mistakes that could be fixed as he went along, or otherwise tie back into my points above. I will add that the fandom certainly puts a lot of words into Redacted’s mouth, and more often than not are those words entirely obscured. Trying to dig for the truth doesn’t help my frustration with him, especially as he continues to make very questionable writing choices, but it’s not his fault his fandom lacks the ability to critically engage with his content. It is his fault for encouraging it.

I will say at least, that regardless of my personal opinion of him as a person (that being, he doesn’t exactly come off as someone I would find pleasant to be around), he has a lot of potential as a writer. If anyone sends this his way out of malice against me, include this sort of tl;dr message: Redacted has written a lot of mediocre but fun moments and a lot of great ones too. He’s got the potential to be a fantastic writer, and he’s got great ideas that could be shaped into a very memorable world. However, he’s only hindering himself by cutting out conflicts, doubling down on portrayals of “good” and “evil” characters, and playing it safe seemingly out of fear that his writing would be taken the wrong way. I believe even the most visceral reactions outside my own have assumed the best intentions from him, and I think he needs to similarly forgive himself for his mistakes, learn from them, and continue on while still taking risks and trusting in his own vision. If he finds himself written into a corner or his portrayals go the wrong way, he needs to either work with what he’s made or try to conclude it the best he can and try again with another story. Using retcons and cure-alls will not help him grow as a writer, and writing only fluff will hamper the impact of any major events that come in the future, nor will the actions of characters in those events likely make any narrative sense.

On a more personal note, he doesn’t have to be so concerned about “torturing” his fans with plot. He should be well aware that his fans are sensitive to all of his content, and over-exaggerate a lot of their reactions whether out of being frankly ridiculous, or just generally having an excited outburst from their enjoyment. While I won’t tell him to not be careful with his content, he can absolutely write impactful stories with gritty conflicts without being grim and dark all the time. Just look at the roots of his channel. There is a way to satisfy both people who want an actual plot and people who want a comfortable set of videos to relax to. However, he has to build up to those stories for that impact to be real. I’d say that he does drop bits of lore in his videos, and has done bits of foreshadowing here and there, and that’s just a skill that needs to be worked on to be perfected. That being said, he needs to stop expecting perfection from himself every time.

Redacted. If you won’t take it from the people who worship the ground you walk on, then take it from the crankiest person in this fandom: you do not need to be perfect. I’m not mad that he fails, I’m mad that he’s continuing to fail and sabotaging his own efforts. If he’s that concerned, then he should find people to critique his writing. Not people close to him or anyone from the fandom either, as that’s basically recruiting yes-men which, politely, he does not need. If he keeps trying to walk on eggshells, he will attract an audience that requires and expects that from him constantly, and no one can withstand the immense pressure that places on them forever.

This has gone on far too long. I’ve been writing this post too long and I probably missed some things too. As you can see, there’s a lot I’ve been wanting to say, and I just want to personally sit down with Mr. Redacted and hand him a mug that says “World’s Okayest Writer” and maybe on the back it says “for now.” Anyways. I’m done. If you need me to elaborate or actually talk about future events, anons are open. I’ll try my best to be civilized. Goodbye.

#i need a nap

[omiscurls]

Heyhey! I couldn’t find your rules, so idk if this is allowed or not, and if it isn’t feel free to ignore this, but may I request Childe with a reader who has depression? Thank you

tough

a/n: hi!! sorry for that, the rules are added by now, i chose not to describe depression itself, because it looks different on everyone, and you may not relate to what applies to me, but i'm hoping you'll find this enjoyable instead!!

plot: character helping the reader out of a breakdown, or a bad headspace

contains: tartaglia, kaeya

warnings: bad copying mechanisms, low mental place, nothing too serious mentioned

tartaglia

now, he's a man of action less than words, even though he's good with those, too

and to add to that, he's also a very perceptive person - if some negative vibe lingers on you for too long, he'll notice right away

however, relying on his experience, he opts to give you space to figure it out on your own, first, he wouldn't like to be making a huge deal of something that was just a worse couple of days

it's when you don't show up at your usual dinner spot, that he gets a little tingle in his brain, telling him to not dismiss it this time.

and so, he makes his way over to your place.

"ya there?" you hear on the other side of the door, followed by urgent knocking, sort of breaking you out of a trance, but you can't find it in you to go and answer it. he'll go away, you think, even better. your apartment is messy, you're messy, too, and it's not the right time to be receiving visitors. so you stay quiet.

"you do know i know you're in there, right?" he speaks up again "the blinds would be down if you weren't"

come in, you want to shout, and although no voice leaves your throat, soon the door opens anyway.

"hey, what's up, you weren't on the- oh." he stops in his tracks in the middle of the corridor, and you're already mentally prepared to a snarky remark about your sorroundings, but the only thing he says is a lighthearted "why're you sitting on the floor?"

the first thing he thinks about is to level with you, so he plops himself down right beside you, and you bet it looks funny - you in yesterday's clothes, in a big, probably smelly, mess, and then a harbinger in full military outfit right beside you.

"i-" you try to say, but your throat seems too dry and worn out, so you opt for a whisper "look at his place"

he indeed does, hinting the small note of desperation in your voice.

"what about it?"

"it's a mess!" you sigh, covering your face with your hands, out of both embarrassment, and fatigue. you take a big breath before continuing "so i wanted to clean it up, i even brought all the... all the things, but it's so much stuff to do, and i'm tired, and- and i don't know!" you choose to stop as not to snap right then and there. "i can't even do my shitty chores right like an adult" you mumble, massaging your temples.

"and is sitting on the floor helping?" he simply asks, and for a second, you're almost mad at him for not being more... cooey and fuss over you a bit more. he sounds cold.

"what are you-"

"really, is it helping?" he repeats "because from how i see it, every little thing would seem bigger if you looked at it from this angle. come on" he nudges you before standing up, and offering a hand to lift you up. you, however, shake your head.

"i really can't deal with it today, childe, i'm sorry"

"just stand up" he pleas, and the second you take his hand, he helps you up in less than a second. when you're on his level again, he sneaks both his arms on the sides of your waist, and sort of sways around a little, before speaking again. "what if, what if we do it little by little? look, we'll start over there" he puts his hand on top of yours, and lifts your arm to point to the full sink along with his. "and that'd be it for today! and then tomorrow... actually, let's not make plans. we'll just pick something tomorrow, and do it then. does the sink sound like a lot to do?" he asks.

"do you want me to be honest, or do you want me to say no" you mutter, earning the heartiest and brightest laughter you've heard in days from him.

"always honest. but come on, i'll help." he rolls you out of his embrace, causing you to feel a sudden wave of cold, it was comfortable back there, you think.

however, as he works through the dishes with you, the pile does seem to lessen, and doesn't rule over your kitchen anymore. every time he hands you a plate to dry, he smiles as wide as he can, and it doesn't seem to bother him at all when you don't smile back.

"remember" he starts again, after a while of comfortable silence. he looks ridiculous, doing the kitchen duties in an outfit designed mostly to look presentable and slay enemies in it, but the look on his face is dead set. "the first lesson you've gotta learn before going off to battle something, is that the best defense is always, always to fight back. and if you don't think you can manage that, well, that's why nobody ever battles alone. it's common sense to have someone watching your back. and as for you, not only are you a great warrior yourself, but you've also got the best second-in-command willing to help you out. don't forget that."

kaeya

as for him, he's also perceptive and empathic, but the difference between him and tartaglia is that he does believe people have the right to figure some things out on their own, he's a firm believer in the magic of secrets

that's probably because he himself doesn't like to share too much about his deeply personal feelings

so he'd obviously see some wave of difficult emotions coming your way, but would he immediately start worrying? probably not

the guy doesn't have healthy copying mechanisms himself, don't think he expects those of others

every other night the two of you meet up at the tavern, kaeya always ordering wine, you asking the bartender for whatever was in store today, but it's never anything alcoholic.

and just like nearly always, you're seated at angel's share, him noticing you're not particularly in the mood for talking, and choosing to entertain you with as many stories of the day that went by as he can remember.

the waiter interrupts him, asking if your minds are already made up regarding the drink. now, kaeya always has you picking first, but since he sees you're still analyzing the card (as if you expected to find anything new), he goes first with a drink he knows charles makes really strong.

to his surprise, when it comes to you, you just mumble "i'll have the same he had"

before the waiter has a chance of writing that down, kaeya tells him that actually, you're gonna need a minute or two more, and to erase the order you've both put in.

as he walks away, the calvary captain's eyes pierce through yours.

"that's a pretty nasty drink you wanted there" he starts, feeling he can't let you handle your mess this time, preparing to dig a little deeper into what's on your mind.

you shrug your shoulders.

"hey" he speaks up a little firmer, hand moving to cover yours, and even though they twitch as to retreat from his grip, you let it be. "tell me what's up."

"nothing's <up>" you accentuate. "can't i even have a drink now?"

"obviously you can" he nods "as long as i know you're trying it just for the taste, and not for the strong kick it's gonna offer, cause that's a dangerous path that only leads to nasty places." concern shines through his gaze, and an encouraging smile is wandering somewhere in his expression, however his lips are still pressed into a tight line, the same he forms when he's either fighting or arguing.

you stay silent for a good long while, before sighing.

"maybe i want the kick. good, or bad, maybe i want to feel... something."

the sentence sounds all too familiar, as he shakes his head and takes your hand, leading you towards the exit.

"what're you-"

"you're obviously not in the right state to be in a bar, of all places" he states almost coldly "so i'm getting you somewhere safer."

the two of you leave the bar, and walk out into the cold of mondstadt's street, covered in the darkness of the night. you walk past him, not leveling up to him, just tagging along to whatever he's going.

it comes as a surprise, that you're neither headed for your apartment, nor his, nor the knights' headquarters. he's guiding you in an unknown direction, until you reach a dead end.

he clims up a small building, offering you a hand and shaking off your confused expressions and questions. "you'll see" he says. the two of you walk from roof to roof, and countless times you tell him it's ridiculous, but then, he jumps onto the city's wall, helping you out with two hands this time, sitting you down right next to him on the stone surface of the wall. it's a little wet from the night's humidity, and cold, and probably dirty too, but the moon shines right at you, and from this perspective, you see thousands of lights in houses, taverns and shops, from the bottom up to the cathedral.

going up from that, a calm and peaceful lake paints the landscape blue on the left, and even from up here, you see a sea of lampgrasses shining through the leaves of wolvendom forest. if you squint, lights are still on in dawn winery, and the path to liyue and all the other lands swirls around near diluc's house. there's so much you can see, even if the night limits your vision.

"i like to come here when i need to gain some perspective over what is happening in my life right now" kaeya speaks really softly and quietly, bordering on a whisper. "it's a beautiful view, even someone as insensitive to art as i am can see that, but other than that... it's huge. and even though it is, it's also alive. every single one of those beings whose lights are dying out as they slowly go to sleep one by one, they're alive. they're not a scenery, they're their own, individual worlds. and they all coexist with each other in such a clever manner, don't you think? they have their differences, they might even hate each other, or wish the worst upon the other's name, but from up here? they fit together like puzzles of one, big picture."

"that's a nice way to put it, for sure" you whisper, looking down onto your knees. his finger pushes your chin slightly to make you face him, and he smiles at you gently, thumb brushing against the skin of your cheek.

"you know, we each have our own worlds, built from scratch from such fragile materials. we have our worlds rise, shine, and crumble before our sights. we look over the ruins of them and think, this is the end of the world. there's nothing more, it's all dust now. but from up here, you see how many other worlds there are - everyone has their own. not everything that is happening in your world is true. you see it from first person's perspective, and therefore the view might be disturbed by many different aspects. you might not see the picture, you just see the broken puzzle fragment that can't fit with the rest, and you're ready to throw away the entire picture, without finishing it. but being here, it reminds me... the world doesn't end on the ruins you see. you can always ask someone to help you build them up again, and of course, you can expect it to fall into pieces once more, but this time, you'll keep in mind, there're-" he stopped, pointing to the city's lights. "so many people to help you raise it up to the clouds."

"your metaphor is really complex" you chuckle, but his face stays still.

"it's not the end of the world if your puzzle piece is broken. and the ruins are not unfixable if you feel too tired to build them up all by yourself. if anything, that's a start." his hand travels up to keep the hair from getting on your face, since the wind blows pretty hard on this height. "what do you say we start your puzzle once more, toghether?"

-

your friendly reminder that you can request things [here]

#kaeya x reader #kaeya fluff #kaeya headcanons #tartaglia fluff #tartalgia #childe fluff #childe x reader #childe headcanons #childe #genshin impact x reader #genshin headcanons #genshin fluff #genshin impact #genshin impact fluff #gender neutral reader

[ohnopoe]

Potential Breakup Song | Jack Daniels

Ship: Jack Daniels x Reader Summary: It’s your birthday, and all you want to do is have a few drinks with your boyfriend, but when he doesn’t show, your coworker, Jack, takes it upon himself to check on you Word Count: 2.2k+ Tagging: @the-purity-pen​  Author’s Note: Ok so this... idk how this happened tbh. BUT I’d kind of love to write more for these two, I have some slight ideas, but idk... so if you’d like to see something more please let me know!

Sitting there alone at the little booth you had claimed over an hour earlier certainly wasn’t how you had expected the evening to go. You had been happy, excited even, when you finally grabbed your coat to leave Statesmen for the day, readying yourself for a proper, fun night out with your boyfriend.

Sure, you’d had to remind him twice already to meet you at the little bar you liked that was not far from work, and sure maybe it would have been fun to invite some friends too, but this was your birthday, and even having a few drinks with your man seemed better than nothing.

But the day had seemed to drag on, as if it knew you were anticipating the well-needed break.

With every knock on the door, a part of you couldn’t help but hope for something, although you couldn’t quite tell what.

Would it have been nice if your coworkers had realised what day it was? Sure. But then, hiding it off facebook had been your decision, and you couldn’t truly blame them for not knowing when you were so careful about keeping things separate between work and home. But with each interruption to your work came a following disappointment. Reports were required, devices needed testing, and not one person seemed to have anything but more work to add to your pile.

Dread was dancing in your periphery, but you refused to give into it.

You had decided this. You had been the one to do that damn stupid idea and hide your information in some desperate plea that someone would remember you even without the irritating little notification Facebook offered. You couldn’t blame others for your own actions, no matter how much it hurt to feel so damned forgotten on your birthday of all things.

But, as you sat alone in the booth at your favourite bar, well, that dread sure was starting to egg away at you.

Another glance at your phone, a silent reminder of just how long you’d been waiting along with the lack of any explanation, only helped solidify your negativity. What if he wasn’t coming? What if he’d forgotten too?

The drink you’d been nursing for the better part of an hour sat before you, the ice had melted into the mix, making it weak and watery as you took a hesitant sip once more. If he wasn’t there by the time you finished, you’d leave. That’s what you’d said to yourself some thirty minutes ago when the drink had arrived. But even you could see you were drawing out the inevitable now, taking slow sips in the hopes of prolonging what little chance there was.

“Either that’s the worst damn drink you’ve ever had, or somethin’s on your mind,” a familiar voice almost cooed from above you, amusement tangling with something you couldn’t quite place as the silhouette of Agent Whiskey blocked out a good portion of the bar.

Offering a half hearted smile, you took a determined gulp of the drink in your hand, stubbornly meeting his gaze as you did so. There was always something about the agent that brought out a fierce competitive side in you, and maybe it was the sheer determination to not appear as pathetic as you felt, but you found yourself offering a smirk as you placed it down on the table without a word, silently challenging him.

“Alright, maybe not,” he offered a chuckle, lips pulling into a smile and drawing out that dimple that caught far too much attention.

“Something I can help you with, Whiskey?” and damn it, that didn’t come off half as harsh as you had hoped. Hell, it didn’t even come off sarcastic. The usual fire in your tone seemed lost, and you could only hope he didn’t hear the way your voice broke ever so slightly with the question.

You weren’t used to this. You’d kept your private life private for a reason, kept yourself away from the work functions and the celebratory drinks in the hopes of distancing yourself from the people you worked with for the most part, and now, having him in front of you out in the real world, when you were already so damn close to breaking… it wasn’t something you were quite prepared for.

“You looked like you could use some company,” he answered simply with a shrug, and if his eyes hadn’t blazed with that intensity you’d seen so often when he was in the field, you might just have believed he was as nonchalant as he attempted to appear.

But his statement brought another thought, more harrowing than the last, and you had to take another sip of your drink to wet your suddenly dry throat as it plagued you.

“How long have you been watching me?”

With a sigh, that playful smirk you’d seen so often slipped from his lips. With a quick point to the opposite side of the booth, he waited until you nodded your consent before slipping in with yet another sigh, but still he didn’t answer your question.

“Don’t see you around here often,” and it almost sounded like a line, were it not for the curious way his gaze took you in as he spoke.

Your shrug was an attempt at something casual, but you knew he was too damn good at reading people to fall for that. “Maybe it wasn’t my idea,” it was. “Maybe someone asked me here,” they didn’t.

But he seemed to read more from your words than you thought you had offered, his attention falling from you to the drink in your hand, before darting around the room and landing on the door.

“Well, he’s a damn fool to leave you waiting,” he huffed, and, while you still felt on edge being around the agent you worked with day in and day out, a small, albeit genuine, smile broke through your demeanour.

It was just a line, just a statement anyone would make upon hearing someone had potentially been stood up. Your mind was screaming at you to remember that it didn’t truly hold the weight you desperately wished it did. But your heart clung to those words.

Were you really this desperate for someone to actually care about you on your birthday that you were clinging to hollow words said out of propriety? Damn, maybe you were. Maybe Ginger had been right all along, you really should go out with her some time, maybe having some real friends at work wouldn’t be all that bad after all.

“Alright, what about this,” Jack broke your harrowing line of thought with that charming smile he had down pat. “I buy you a drink, we relax, have a good time… if he shows, he shows, and I’ll leave y’all to it, if not, well, hopefully I’m not the worst company.”

A laugh, the first you’d managed all day, escaped your lips as you shook your head at the cowboy’s poor attempt at humility.

“Why would you do that?” the question sounded meeker than you would have liked, and you had to glance away when his confused gaze met yours. But the bar was filled with distractions, even if it wasn’t particularly busy, and you quickly clung to them as you regained some sort of a backbone. “You know damn well half the bar is eyeing you off, you don’t need to waste your evening on me, Jack.”

If his breath caught at hearing your slip up, hearing you utter his name for the first time in far too long, well, he was damn good at hiding it behind that playful smirk. But there was still that shine to his gaze as he watched you so intently that you could feel it even as you focused on swirling the small remainders of your drink.

“And leave you to this lot?” he questioned playfully, raising a brow as he gestured around you both comically. “Honey, I know all too well what these types would do to a pretty lil thing like you, all alone.”

“You would know,” you scoffed a laugh, and, damn it, how was it so easy to relax around him? You’d known him for years, sure, but never personally, always keeping that carefully concocted professional appearance in place.

“Darlin’, are you implying something here?” there it was, that playful lilt to his tone that he always seemed to offer at just the right time, almost cracking your hard exterior more times that you’d care to admit.

“You forget, Whiskey,” you pause, giving him a pointed look that didn’t quite have its usual impact as your lips desperately struggled to hide that playful smile that wanted to break free. “I’ve been on the other end of the comms during far too many of your missions. I know all too well what you’re capable of.”

The smirk he gave in response held a twinge of danger, his eyes lighting up as he leant forwards just enough to capture your full attention. This was a side of Jack you had seen through his glasses many times, a side he hadn’t shown you since you shot him down cold at the very beginning of your working together, and it was a side that could thrill even the most cold hearted of individuals, you were sure.

“Oh, darlin’, you have no idea.”

Well, that certainly shouldn’t have affected you as much as it did.

You’d been working with Whiskey for years now, you knew all too well what he was like, how much he liked to flirt and mess around. You’d watched through his glasses camera on numerous occasions as he flirted his way into the beds of targets, each time rolling your eyes to yourself because you’d surely never fall for something so cheesy.

But then, you’d always been safely seeing things from his perspective, hadn’t you? You’d never seen that intense gaze he offered along with those words, never watched as his tongue darted out to wet those plush lips… damn, maybe you weren’t as strong as you had always thought.

“Babe, hey!” a puffed out breath came from beside you, drawing your attention away from the perfect cupid’s bow that was hidden behind that neatly trimmed moustache.

You almost jumped at the sound, turning quickly to see your boyfriend standing there, looking none too happy to see you sitting there with another man, and, despite the fact you’d been waiting for, was that two hours now?, you felt guilt creep in.

“Hey!” you offered the brightest smile you could, even if it felt somewhat off as you glanced between the two men.

They couldn’t have been more different if they tried. One, the epitome of the suave cowboy, the other in what he so affectionally labelled ‘prime casual fashion’, or, as you secretly called it, jumped up t-shirts that had no right to charge as much as they did. Jack was leaning back in the booth, exuding comfort and confidence, while your boyfriend stood there glancing between you and Jack with a tense jaw. In fact, the only similarity between the two seemed to be the intense fire that sat in their gazes as they eyed one another up.

Oh good, yet another display of stupid macho masculinity. With a roll of your eyes, you cleared your throat, quickly gaining the attention of the silently feuding men. “Jack, this is my boyfriend, Tim-”

“Timothy,” Tim interjected, standing up even straighter, as if the use of his full name would hold some form of power.

Closing your eyes to avoid rolling them once more as you watched him look down his nose at Whiskey, you ignored the interruption. “Tim,” you started once more, more than a hint of irritation in your tone at the fact the same man who had left you waiting for so long was now trying to play some kind of stupid game. “This is Jack, we work together.”

It seemed the two didn’t particularly care about introductions, or, for that matter, manners, as they continued to stare at one another in silence for a long moment.

“I’ll leave y’all to it,” Jack spoke suddenly, breaking the tense atmosphere with a nod as he moved far too smoothly out of the booth. How he always seemed to move with such elegance had often caused you to wonder. It didn’t seem to match the macho cowboy exterior he gave off, but worked so seamlessly when he was in a fight. It was a part of him, small and subtle, that had caught your attention more times than it ought.

Only when Tim sidled up next to you, pushing you further into the booth did your mind fall back to reality with a frown. Words were already falling out of his mouth, mentions of his day, of the clients he had dealt with, and not a word of apology for how late he was, and that same resignation you had felt earlier seemed to sweep over you once more.

“Happy birthday, Y/N,” Jack spoke softly, the words somehow a farewell. His smile was gentle as he met your surprised gaze.

And then, just as suddenly as he had appeared, he was gone, leaving the bar’s doors swaying after him as your boyfriend clambered for your attention.

#jack daniels #jack daniels x reader #agent whiskey x reader #agent whiskey #kingsman #My fic

[ddaenghoney]

Series: Flora

Finale

masterlist link in blog description

After spending more than a decade establishing a career as an acclaimed actress, you decide to go on a sudden hiatus while also discreetly moving to a new townhome, renting out the second room to your old friend from high school: Kim Taehyung

Pairing(s):

Kim Taehyung x Y/N

ft. Lim Jaebeom x Y/N

disclaimer: any character depicted do not represent the actual personality of the respective idol in real life.

Series warning(s)/genre(s): Social media/Fake Text AU, Roommates au, somewhat Slow Burn relationship (or is it more oblivious to lovers ?), Actress!Y/N, Flower shop owner and model!Taehyung, fluff, drama(bc it’s me), romance, angst (updated as needed)

If you enjoyed, PLEASE let me know!! Thank you so much for reading the entirety of this story! I really enjoyed making it! I’ll see you in the next story! 

Tag(s): @atulipandarosee @jaienn @lemonteacyst @swanboysuga @kennedaddy00 @cribabieee @betysotelo18 @sherizaraiyah 

Below the cut are some fun facts about the story!

Do people read these haha idk but anyways here we gooo

The name “Flora” is a noun that refers to all of the plant life of a particular place. I used the name because, like plants (in particular, flowers) face various adversity to bloom, so do the characters of this story! It also adds an element of care, because certainly flowers can bloom on their own, but they can also reach new, greater heights when given assistance along the way. And lastly, “flora” refers to many different plants rather than just one, and Y/N begins the story on her own, but learns to learn others in as she takes control of her life!

Originally, Taehyung wasn’t going to be a florist; he was going to be a member of BTS and would have met Y/N when he co-starred in a movie with her!

I don’t personally think Rose is much of an antagonist, so much as a misguided friend. She really did think what she was doing was for Y/N’s own good, but of course learned that to not be the case.

If you had to ask me, I think Y/N caught feelings before Taehyung did, but did a lot more to push them away and ignore them. I would say around the time she went out with Rose and Jueun was when she’d already started crushing on him.

Taehyung, Jeongguk, Jimin, and Y/N had all attended the same performing arts high school. Jimin and Yoongi met when they were in the same company, Namjoon knew Taehyung from when he was still trying to be an actor, Jeongguk met Seokjin in college, and Hoseok and Seokjin went to high school together. And that’s sort of how they all knew each other somehow LOL.

Y/N had a crush on Taehyung in high school! I hinted at that, but never got too deep into it haha, maybe I’ll write a blurb featuring the concept in the future.

Instead of Y/N’s CEO being such a negative character, I also contemplated having her parents be antagonistic. I mean, she did work in the acting industry since she was around 12 so it would make sense they had something to do with the plot, but I decided against it because it would’ve further complicated the plot to bring in a familial dynamic issue as well. 

I thought about making Jueun much more manipulative, like succeeding in befriending Y/N, driving her to kick Taehyung out, making her and Taehyung date for a bit, but I just,,,,, it made it too much lol. Like, she had her ulterior motive against Y/N, but all of the extra stuff just made her too malicious for what I wanted the story to be, and I think how it is now is more realistic anyways. 

Speaking of Jueun, her manager sucks doesn’t he lol. I made him like that because I didn’t even her situation to be free of the struggles that Y/N has to go through. In a lot of ways many of the celebrities (Y/N, Jueun, Rose, and Namjoon) all showed a lot of different ways that they’re inhibited from acting as they like, because to some extent they’re all just cogs in a machine. Sort of dreary isn’t it LOL

I imagine that Y/N returns to acting years later, maybe about four.

By that time, I figure she and Taehyung would be married haha

Taehyung didn’t do much on social media compared to past guys from my other stories; it’s because using it, especially after all hell broke loose, really made him nervous. This au’s Taehyung isn’t fond of fame to any degree.

Originally, I was going to use Jinyoung as the secondary male lead, but I switched it to Jaebeom because I wanted to drive one of my friends crazy lol 

In her break from celebrity life, Y/N works at the flower shop with Taehyung, but also eventually gets into helping direct/produce productions for kids/teens at a local community theater; I intend to write a piece about that eventually!

I also have this xxx thing that I’d like to write at the flower shop but LOL ANYWAYS

Thank you so much for reading! I greatly appreciate feedback and comments if you enjoyed, because it really gives me a lot of inspiration and motivation to continue writing. Even small comments, anonymous comments, any comments at all mean SO much. Thank you again! See you soon!

#taehyung smau #taehyung series #taehyung fluff #bts smau #bts fluff #bts series #all #series flora

[lavender-lotion]

Fanfic Writer Asks

I was tagged by @asarcasticwitch - thank you so much!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

737, which is an ugly number :(

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

1,890,054 words, which ... AH I might actually get to 2mil by the end of the year!

3) How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

thank you, ao3 dashboard for this handy list:

Teen Wolf (TV) (377)

X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies) (187)

Marvel Cinematic Universe (93)

Glee (29)

Young Justice (Cartoon) (11)

Kingsman (Movies) (9)

Original Work (9)

The Avengers (Marvel Movies) (8)

Criminal Minds (US TV) (7)

Thor (Movies) (6)

Deadpool (Movieverse) (5)

Weird City (TV) (5)

X-Men (Original Timeline Movies) (4)

Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga) (4)

Ragnarok (TV 2020) (4)

Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies) (3)

Teen Wolf (TV) RPF (3)

Iron Man (Movies) (3)

The House in the Cerulean Sea - T. J. Klune (2)

Venom (Marvel Movies) (1)

Stranger Things (TV 2016) (1)

Captain America (Movies) (1)

Fate: The Winx Saga (TV) (1)

Power Rangers Ninja Storm (1)

X-Men - All Media Types (1)

Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan (1)

Riverdale (TV 2017) (1)

X-Men Evolution (1)

Push (2009) (1)

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

With You, I Belong

Mates and Marriage Proposals

The Perceptions of You and I

(baby) maybe that matters more

Breathing You In

5) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

ughh so, fair warning, I have a lot of works. I definitely do not remember all of them, however I do have four works tagged as Unhappy Ending and then another nine works tagged Ambiguous/Open Ending, which is way more than I’d thought I had! 

however, there is one fic that stands out in mind when I think about which of my works has the angstiest ending! Heed the tags :)

And Now?

Teen And Up Audiences | Major Character Death | M/M | Teen Wolf (TV) | Chris Argent/Peter Hale/Stiles Stilinski | Chris Argent, Peter Hale, Stiles Stilinski | Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Canonical Character Death, Peter Hale Dies, Unhappy Ending

Stiles Stilinski finds out who his soul mates are by setting one on fire.

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

ughhhhhhhh I truly do not know??? 

7) Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I don’t write many crossovers at all! I have some mcu/teen wolf cross overs, I have a teen wolf/glee cross over plotted (that i’ll probably never write), but my strangest is probably this teen wolf/x-men cross over!

what-ifs (don’t fuckin’ matter to no one)

Teen And Up Audiences | No Archive Warnings Apply | M/M | X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies)Teen Wolf (TV) | Logan (X-Men)/Sheriff Stilinski | Logan (X-Men), Sheriff Stilinski, Stiles Stilinski | Memory Loss, Telepathy, Mentions of War, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Child Neglect, Grief/Mourning, Telepath Stiles Stilinski, Telekinetic Stiles Stilinski, Nightmares, Cuddling & Snuggling

There’s somethin’ there. Somethin’ that has him sleeping curled up on his side with a pillow tucked to his chest, somethin’ that has him splittin’ up his food ‘fore he eats ‘cause he don’t need as much as a baseline. Has him turnin’ to tell someone shit that ain’t there. There’s just...there’s just somethin’ there that’s missin’ and it shouldn’t be missin’.

8) Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

sometimes! I don’t write a lot of smut because I actively dislike writing it, but the smut I do write is super super soft and sappy and full of emotions lol

9) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I respond to almost all of my comments! comments i won’t respond to: negative comments, unsolicited criticism, comments that aren’t relevant to the fic itself, comments simply asking for more 

I love love love responding to comments! I love every single comment that I get and I want to show how much I appreciate getting them, and personally I think responding to comments is the only way to do that! everyone has different comment philosophies, but for me, if someone is taking the time to comment on my fic like I so badly want them to, I think it’s important to respond to show my appreciation! 

10) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

aha YEAH I DO. this past weekend I actually got a number of shitty comments and had to file two ao3 abuse reports for harrasment (: I love it

I am no stranger to hate comments. I write copious amounts of age difference fic. I write copious amounts of incest. I am not going to apologize nor am I going to feel bad for enjoying either.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

ughhh I sure as heck hope not! 

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! I have a number of them :) I always always do my best to make sure it’s linked to the original fic, AND that I add a tag noting that there’s a translation!

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have made a few attempts! the only successful attempt is there's nothing i wouldn't do to make you feel my love which is a collaboration with @flightinflame, not quite a co-write!

14) What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I am unable to answer this lol I don’t have an all-time favourite. mutli-shipping forever.

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

god okay this is such a good question! imma ramble about a few so bear with me here! (i may have 700 posted works but I also have a few hundreds wips & ideas floating around in my gdrive, too)

gone & past - this is a starrish wip i’d started in 2017. I ended up deleting it from ao3 to rewrite it and never got there, but I have about 20k of content! I built my home, inside of you - thorki human au with college jock thor and high school dancer loki. i’ve got a start and nothing else Sheriff Stilinski Gets Some Sweet Sweet Lovin’ - massive wip where... well, the sheriff fucks his way through the entire pack. I want to write it but. trans allison au - this is an au where allison is trans and that changes the entire season 1 canon. it features stallison, petopher, and a looooooong ass outline that will never exist beyond my wips You Fill My Heart (With Such a Gentle Love) - this is a stetopher a/b/o au with pregnant omega stiles and alpha pair petopher falling in love. it started as a labour of love to someone I no longer have in my life. I have about 30k, a full outline, but idk. makes me sad to think about it they slipped briskly into an intimacy from which they never recovered - this is my big x-men first class rewrite that I honestly don’t think i’ll ever finish. I have a few thousand words, a full outline, but no love lost for cherik so. doubtful Physiotherapy (I'll Be Your Baby) - this was a fic I was SO excited about, and then it kinda flopped and stayed a wip because I didn’t have a plan or the motivation to finish it. it’s a winterspider human au with amputee bucky and science twink peter that I adore the premise of but who knows breathing you in chapter 2 - I have a massive second chapter planned for this fic but the first did so good so fast I am way too intimidated to write more in case everyone hates it lmao

there are more arjgoirjeg there are so many more but these are the bigger ones I can think of right now!

16) What are your writing strengths?

ughhhhh I hate answering this because I have, like, seriously bad imposter syndrome around my writing BUT I do think i’m able to weave poignant backstory into narration & i write strong, distinctive narrative voices!

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

literally I can’t write settings at all. I don’t know how people vividly describe settings but I absolutely cannot do that and it’s one of the reasons I haven’t delved into original fiction. I need to write the town my characters live in?? fuck that imma just use a location we’ve seen on screen & let readers fill in the blanks lmao

I am also shit at long fic. I don’t have the mind for long and interesting plots, and I don’t have the focus to write long fic (which is why every long fic i’ve ever posted has taken me literal years to complete smh).

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I like it! both as a reader and as a writer. as a writer, I generally only use a few words, or small sentences that can be understood by context, and I generally don’t 

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

the last thing I wrote and posted was this one:

Languish

Teen And Up Audiences | No Archive Warnings Apply | M/M | X-Men (Original Timeline Movies) | John Allerdyce/Bobby Drake | Bobby Drake, John Allerdyce, X-Men (Team) | Not Canon Compliant, Future Fic, Established Relationship, Summer, Teasing, Fluff

It was a really, really hot Saturday, and most of the school was outback, enjoying the sun, not caring about the heat, and having the time of their life.

Everyone but Bobby, of course, who was melting away.

“I just want to remind everyone that I make ice. I am the Ice Man. I am not built for the heat and soon enough I’m going to melt away into nothing.”

20) What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

this is another impossible question! I have a few I really enjoy, but I really don’t think I have a favourite that stands out above the rest!

i’m tagging: @4magicandmayhem @insertmeaningfulusername @midrashic @wynnefic @ikeracity @stronglyobsessed @elledelajoie @wolfnprey​ & anyone else who sees it and wants to do it! seriously! go ahead :)

blank questions below the read more!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

3) How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

5) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

7) Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

8) Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

9) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

10) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

14) What’s your all-time favorite ship?

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

16) What are your writing strengths?

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

20) What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

#lavenderlotion #my writing #writing tag #writing meme

[notmymainblog]

if you're accepting requests, could you do a post-azkaban sirius x reader where she's the same age as tonks so they're in like a more secret relationship but somehow the whole order finds out?

I just deleted all of my progress, and I’m ready to die.

Idk if you see responses to your asks unless I tag u so I'm tagging you @msmb

I believe the age gap between Remus and Tonks is ten years?

I put Trewlany in the order to add some spice

If i forget a member of the order: no the fuck i didn’t.

TW: stressed Sirius </3 fluff, mentions, of war, them making out cause it’s literally unavoidable. uuuh that's it.

Master list

InteractiveFics

To use:

Download obvi. Click the icon (upper right by the search bar) in the first box to enter your name. If you did it correctly y/n should read as your actual name. Under that it will say something along the lines of “need to change something other than y/n?” there you can change anything you want.

y/h/c and y/h don't work together so please enter y/ho if you're inputting your Hogwarts house

Here’s a song I like:

There was a war coming. A dangerous war against a dangerous man. Everyone was freaking the fuck out, especially Sirius. The boy he was supposed to be protecting was caught up in the middle of it all.

You were the best method of stress relief. Your y/h/c hair, soft skin, smell, taste, voice, laugh, everything about you made Sirius slow down, take deeper breaths. Sometimes you were the only way he could fall asleep.

But he was old, or so he thought, ‘I’m thirty fucking six, and she’s in her twenties. This is ridiculous. She can’t really love me,’ he’d think.

But time and time again, you proved him wrong. Showing him how much you loved him with every kiss, with every touch, with every word, with every breath. And he gave your love right back. You were there for him, and he was there for you.

As you were lying in bed, you turned to face him, “I want to tell them,” you said.

He pulled you close as he whispered, “I know you do, but what would Molly think? Or Remus? Or Harry? Hermione would flip her shit and Arthur-”

“Ok, ok, I get it,” you grumbled.

He made up for it by placing a kiss on your nose. He moved to your mouth, and one kiss turned to three, turned to four and five, as you made out. His beard tickled your chin, and his mustache brushed your cupid's bow. Your hands made their way to his hair. God, you loved it when it was long. Threading your fingers through it and pulling gently.

As he moved to your neck, and suddenly the tugging wasn't as gentle. Small gasps and mewls escaped your mouth. His hands rubbed your sides, slowly moving your shirt up your body. He was in no hurry, but you were.

“God, Sirius, please just touch me, baby. I love you so much,” you gasped.

“I love you too, y/n,” he whispered.

“My word!” Molly exclaimed, dropping her laundry basket.

“Molly, I am so sorry, just please don’t...tell,” you trailed off, seeing she had already left.

You turned to Sirius, “what do you think?” you asked.

“I think,” he began, “that she’s going to sit with Tonks after the kids have gone to bed. I think she’s going to get a little tipsy. I think she’s going to tell Tonks. And I firmly believe the whole Order will know by the end of tomorrow.” he said.

You smiled, “would that really be the worst thing in the world?”

He kissed you, “no, but the lectures will be.” he laughed.

You groaned, “I don’t wanna think about it.”

A knock on the door startled you both into sitting positions, “y-yes, come in,” you stuttered.

Fred opened the door, “Mum wants you downstairs for dinner, dunno why she didn’t tell you herself,” he smirked, “nice side part Sirius, please get rid of it as soon as possible it makes your face look asymmetrical.”

“oh my god, Fred and George are going to kill us,” you whispered after he left.

“what’s really scary was the side part you gave me on accident, never again y/n,” he smiled, nuzzling the side of your face affectionately.

“no, that tickles, hey! Quit it! I’m serious, oh don’t you dare,” you warned.

“hmm, I’m pretty damn sure that I’m Sirius,” he said, looking at you for a reaction.

You clenched your jaw before getting up and walking down the stairs. You and Sirius refused to look at Molly the entire time, and Molly did the same.

“I’m sensing an energy,” Trewlany began. You internally groaned. She closed her eyes and raised her hands above her head with her palms facing upward.

“A nervous energy between two, no! Three people. At this,” she pointed away from you, “end of the table,”

Hermione glowered at her.

“Hermione dear, I can feel that it is radiating off of you specifically from your heart,” she said.

She got up from her chair and put a hand over Hermione’s heart, “Ah, yes. So sad, so hopeless, and suddenly angry, whatever could have caused that?” Trelawny pondered.

“I’ll be back with black sage and crystals, dear. I can help you become at peace with the darkness inside yourself,” Trewlany said, walking away from the table.

“She is absolutely batshit,” Hermione whisper shouted.

“I dunno ‘mione she might be right,” Ron said, shrugging.

“Oh shut up, Ronald,” Hermione groaned.

“Hey, you two,” You said, pointing at them, “break it up. Now I’m feeling the negative energy too.”

Hermione rolled her eyes before going back to her food.

The rest of dinner was quiet until Trewlany shuffled into the room, “there, there, dear, I’ll fix it in a millisecond,”

You gave Hermione a glare. She clenched her jaw and let Trewlany get to “work.” A few minutes later, Hermione was “cleansed,” and dinner came to an end.

You and Sirius took a seat on the couch. He looked around before pressing a firm kiss to your lips which you returned gladly.

You both chuckled when you pulled apart.

“Sorry, just couldn’t resist,” he whispered.

“It is more than alright,” you whispered back.

Little did you know the youngest ginger girl residing in the house was watching with a hand clapped over her mouth.

She rushed upstairs, “Ronald, get out of my room. You’re such an asshole,” Hermione said.

“Fine, fine, I’ll go,” he said, putting his hands up in surrender, “Oh hi Ginny,” he said.

As soon as he left, Ginny closed and locked the door.

“You’re never going to believe what I just saw,” she said, grinning.

“Well, go on,” Hermione said, obviously impatient, “spit it out!”

She took a deep breath, “I just saw y/n and Sirius snogging,” she gushed.

“No,” Hermione gasped, “You’re fucking with me!”

“y/n and Sirius?” George said, from behind the door. You looked down to see an extendable ear.

“George, what the fuck!” Hermione said.

“When Ginny ran up the stairs, I knew it was gonna be good, but this, this is amazing, this is priceless, this is- I gotta tell Fred,” he said, running away from the door.

“do not pester that poor girl, or I’ll hex you!” Hermione called after him.

“No promises!” he called back.

She turned to Ginny, “I think one of their only talents is eavesdropping” she nodded.

Meanwhile, in the boy’s shared room, Fred’s mouth hung open, and his eyes were wide.

“No!” Fred exclaimed, as George nodded, “But he’s so old!”

George elbowed him, “he’s not that old. He’s only...I have no clue how old he is, but he’s not old,”

“Oi, do you still have an extendable ear?” Fred asked.

“how do you think I heard it, dummy?” he said as Fred rolled his eyes.

Fred and George crept down the hall to your room. When they discovered you weren’t there, they crept up to Sirius’s room on the third floor. The ear wriggled under the door to hear soft voices.

“You have to be the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen y/n. I am so lucky to have you. I have to be the luckiest man on earth,” he whispered into your ear.

“oh, hush,” you said, they could tell from just your voice that your cheeks were pink, “Besides, look at you. God, you’re fucking artwork, Sirius,” your hand ran up and down his chest.

The twins heard his lips press to your forehead. Of course, they had no idea it was your forehead. They could definitely tell when his lips hit yours. The kisses sounded wetter, and your laugh was muffled. They quickly pulled the ear back from under the door making disgusted faces at each other and shaking their heads.

You and Sirius fell asleep pretty quickly, Fred and George debated bleaching their ears, and Molly did, in fact, get drunk with Tonks. At breakfast, you and Sirius felt five new pairs of eyes on you.

‘what if I just kissed her right now?’ he thought, ‘in front of everyone.’

He shook it off, deciding against it. Towards the end of breakfast, he felt your hand squeeze his, bringing a smile to his face. After breakfast, you sat in the living room with Harry and Ron. It seemed that the only people who didn’t know were Ron, Harry, Remus, and Trelawny. You and Harry had always gotten along well. He saw you as a protector, someone to help and comfort him.

Your heart warmed every time he came to you for advice or just to vent. He was funny too. It was rare when no one laughed at his jokes. Ron liked you a lot also, mostly because Harry liked you and you “weren’t mean like Hermione,” Ginny and Hermione saw you as their best friend too. You had sleepovers at least once a week.

You were joyful and youthful, and everyone wanted to be near you. Even Fred and George would (rarely) avoid pranking you or ask for help. You didn’t get on as well with Tonks and Molly. Ever since Remus rejected her, she had been depressed. Now that she knew you were with Sirius and that the age gap between you two was the same as hers, there was a coldness in her tone. She may have even slightly resented you.

Molly was lovely but quite judgmental, and things were just...awkward. Arthur was kind, but you didn’t have any overlapping interests. And, to quote Hermione, Trelawny was “absolutely batshit,” You got on well with Remus, which always made Sirius smile.

Two ginger boys ran in being chased by a brunette and another ginger girl.

“Fred and George Weasley, don’t you dare!” Hermione said.

“Oh, we dare!” they said in unison.

They stopped in front of Harry and Ron.

“Boys, what are you-” you began.

“y/n and Sirius are snogging,” they said together. They were pretty damn good at it.

Harry was processing the new information very slowly and, well, we all know that look Ron gets when something confuses him. Then they turned to you and Sirius. He sat back on the couch with a small smirk while your eyes were wide with blush covering your cheeks.

“You look so cute like that, y’know,” he said, grabbing your chin to face him.

“Sirius,” you hissed.

“What? They all know,” he shrugged.

Much to his delight, your cheeks grew even warmer.

“So you're, ” Harry started; his reaction was the one you were most worried about, but a large smile graced his face, “y-youre gonna be like my godmother, right?”

You looked at Sirius who nodded, “yeah, yeah I am, ” you smiled.

Harry got up and hugged you, “hey, were not engaged or anything everyone calm down, ” you joked.

“Well actually y/n, ” Sirius smirked.

“Youre fucking joking,” you said.

“Yeah, I'm joking, but someday I won't be, ” he laughed.

Remus just leaned on the doorframe, watching this all go down. When everything calmed down, he walked through the room, stopping to pat Sirius on the back.

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Ok, msmb, I have a warning about the next request of yours I'm posting: it fucking sucks. I mixed fandoms with MHA because I have an obsession with a wrinkly psychopath and man who looks like burnt toast that I just needed to get out of my system. I will ONE HUNDRED PERCENT rewrite it for u love <3

#sirius black #sirius black x reader #harry potter #harry potter marauders #x reader #marauders era #fan fic blog #fan fiction #fanfic #fluff #sirius orion black #sirius x you #sirius black fluff

[scaryorganmusic]

sorry this is really petty but like. this drama is so funny bc ultimately ppl are being accused of liking w*ncest just for like. being mildly dean critical. babes you know you can just block people for disagreeing with you. it doesn’t have to be that deep. in fact it’s literally the only way to survive fandom with more than a quarter of your brain cells left. anyway I’m a dean stan bc I imprinted on him as a child but when I see posts about how he sucks I either agree, disagree and ignore it (and sometimes just unfollow bc I’m curating the most fun online experience for myself as I should), or just say “that makes a lot of sense but it makes me sad so I’m just writing it out of my personal secret good spn”. It’s not that hard.

also like. fellas is not wanting to talk about incest on the blog you run for fun the same as supporting incest /s

also also. the cycle of destiel shippers being annoying and condescending to non destiel shippers -> non destiel shippers understandably deciding they dislike destiel shippers -> destiel shippers being offended for being called annoying is SO funny. tony you CHOSE to do that- like I ship destiel and even I think you’re annoying lmao

Okay I don't plan on talking about this too much anymore but I'll take this as an opportunity to address some things

It is wild how lightly people are treating very awful accusations here. I understand being suspiscious before following someone, because I have accidentally followed people who put that content on my dash (untagged too! because i do have it blacklisted) and it felt so gross. But people are just taking anything they don't like as "sus behavior"

Here are things I've seen people honestly mention that makes you suspicious: obviously being mainly a Sam blog, being "dean critical", being too intense about liking seasons 1-3, shipping sastiel (????), posting mainly about the brothers and not about Cas, criticizing an actor, being reblogged by one of them (even though we also hate when that happens! but it's not something we can control because i don't know every single one of them in order to block) and of course being associated with someone else that's sus.

And here's where I completely agree with what you said: people could just block others for all those things without throwing accusations around! You can just say "most of Sam blogs, or all Sam blogs who don't post destiel, are annoying as hell and i'll block them all" and that's fine! Or, better yet, don't say anything, you don't need to publically announce when you block someone.

Also yeah, a lot of people don't add banners on every post or post nonstop about how gross the wincest shit is because we prefer to avoid it and not be constantly thinking about it. I have the tag blacklisted but I don't do a deep investigation of OP of every post that makes into my dash, and that's kind of a wild expectation.

Quick note on the "dean critical" thing, I've never seen a fandom so weird about people critizing a character. The whole reason people started using the tag was exactly so we could still hang out with people like you, who love him and maybe don't wish to see negative analysis on him, so you could have a tag to blacklist instead of unfollowing! And although it's the bare minimum, I respect the honest attitude of "I know this happened in the show, but personally it's not an aspect I want to read/write meta about" instead of straight up denying stuff.

It is a wild cycle, with so many people (including myself) rejoining the fandom recently it's like you could see us going from "this is fun! i'm gonna follow a bunch of spn blogs" to "this is mildly annoying" to "i hate all of you, blocking spree". Not to be a hypocrite, I was onboard with destiel for most of my time in the fandom, I think I fell out of love with the ship partially because of my rewatch (and it shouldn't be that weird that rewatching something as an adult your perception on it changes!) and partially because of the fandom being so very Like That about it. And the whole fandom experience once you leave that ship is just very different. The bitterfication of the sam girl or whatever.

I do still have destiel mutuals who I appreciate very much, I don't even blacklist the tag because y'all have some amazing artists and I'm always up for fanart, even of things I don't ship (of course with the exception of gross ships).

Anyways yeah it is so infortunate that all of this happened but we move on, idk if anyone took the time to read all of this because it turned more into me venting than anything else but I also appreciate the support i’ve been getting from some of y’all

#fandom wank #Anonymous

[rurifangirl]

For the character ask thingie <3

Syndra

Their mother? How do they think of her? What do they hate? Love? What influence - literal or imagined - did the mother have?

Is your character street-smart, book-smart, intelligent, intellectual, slow-witted?

What does your character’s home look like? Personal taste? Clothing? Hair? Appearance?

Are they basically negative when facing new things? Suspicious? Hostile? Scared? Enthusiastic?

Kayn

What are your character’s manners like? What is their type of hero? Whom do they hate?

What does your character’s home look like? Personal taste? Clothing? Hair? Appearance?

What is your character’s weaknesses? Hubris? Pride? Controlling?

Is your character aware of who they are? Strengths? Weaknesses? Idiosyncrasies? Capable of self-irony?

Hwkskkskwkd aight letsa go

🥀Syndra-

So about her family, I kinda wanted to keep It secret for now but yeah, fuck It, It had a pretty good relationship w her mom, for most of the time being. (This Is all from Syndras past life naturally)

They weren't that particulary close either, like It was more of a "Yeah you exist" kind of relationship rather than your normal mother relationship.

Her mother did influence however its later tendencies with weapons and in specifical swords, as her mother was a blacksmith, so most of the time It was helpin her out.

Nothing much Is needed to add, since I'm planning to also do another comic, but in a way or another Syndra is somewhat still grateful for its mothers ways, but would rarely even to this day mention or talk about her.

----------------------------------------------------------

I'd probably say street smart, put purely because Syndra never really relied on anyone for her part so basically it had to learn everythin by herself, both in her yokai and human life.

----------------------------------------------------------

Her shrine Is pretty much a normal one? I mean in theory, since It has its perks, such as the main patters being mainly reddish ones and having,like swords kinda everywhere, so that's that for instant.

She has many red lamps too and as such it gets onto a really pretty place durin the night. It doesn't have much variety in clothes other than, traditional ones, but she does have a wardrobe of vestes to use especially when training/trying stuff out.

All of her appereance is on her post ofc so I don't think I need to expand more on that, just that, she doesn't rly focus on brushin her hair so either the dumbass quartet has to help it or Syndras done 😭😭

----------------------------------------------------------

Absolutely, if anything she's the one that Is the most unsure about new things and would need a lot of time to get used to It. Even for the human thing this has happened. So Id say, hostile in that case. But suspicious in any other one.

🍇Kayn-

His manners are, polite/kind ones for sure. He's really self aware of, whatevers goin on with him so he'll try to seem the best he can especially with new people. As for the hero part, he could seem like the normal good guy person but I really don't agree w that.

Mainly because I've always seen Kayn as yes a gentle giant and all of that, but at the end of the day he still does MAJOR errors that led to even more horrible conclusions. Like im not talking really about Ruri in this case, but there's other perks that could've saved more people and even if knowin this, he didn't

. He'll try to get as many people as he can, but he knows his limits. And there's no going further that. So even if you'd call him an hero, he wouldn't agree with that. He ain't an hero. He's just, someone trying to avoid awful scenarios for sure and that's something, but he isn't trying to change the world.

He has still many things going on and things he still has to leave behind, so If anything he'll have to get even more development before anyone could call him an hero.

As for the hate thing, yeah Osho. And mabye Chisei but that's more of a gut-hate kind of thing. Other than that he dislikes other few people but really doesnt hate hate them.

----------------------------------------------------------

So idk If I ever mentioned It, but him n Ruri live in the same apartment, so they both kinda have their things around and there ain't a constant theme. Like for example there could be some idk, Bloody-themed stuff and then a bunch of plushies could be outta nowhere

As for the style anything goes for him really. He'd wear more comfy Styles though but only because they're comfortable to walk/live in, since this Is most of the reason why ya ain't seeing him going full goth or cyberpunk stuff.

----------------------------------------------------------

About weaknesses, well both that he's physically really, REALLY weak. Like terribly at that. And his kindness can still bring much trouble in specifical cases, n since he uses to get into trouble quite a lot that's the case. Even his paranoia/self worth can still get in the way though

Ahkdkkskd I've written a lot bout him so I'll try to be brief now

----------------------------------------------------------

Yes, he's pratically the most self concious of the whole gang, both because of bitch Is a tree and also because of his use into physical battles, so he knows that fully. He also knows how good he can also be w negotiation sometimes and can use that as a sort of advantage. But rarely would do so, just, he's vibin

Tags undercut;

@a-chaotic-dumbass @spoopy-fish-writes @damnfoxx @nadi-117 @dopesaladlady @ahmanetsmultifandom @audre-falrose

#ruruasks #rurusocs #oc #ocs #syndra #kayn #kayn my beloved #dragon raja #dragonraja oc #oc dragonraja #mc dragonraja #dragon raja mc #kamisama kiss #kamisama hajimemashita oc #kamisama kiss oc

[ashenhawkfeathers]

my elaborate plot so I can have both HawkAsh & Mothpool

this is unedited and all over the place and IDK if i’ll ever do anything with it but whatever gonna post it,,, og canon is stupid have this instead Anyways here is my main canon changes for Ashfur & Hawkfrost ((i’ll add more cats later)) Ashpaw grew up being friends with Bramblepaw so when Brambleclaw tried to reunite with his half brother Hawkfrost, Ashfur ended up tagging a lot a lot and the two got lots of feelings for each other but didn’t do anything about it UNTIL Brambleclaw left on the big journey and then Ashfur and Hawkfrost originally hung out bc “oh we miss bramble” but they got really gay instead Meanwhile on the journey Bramble’s compulsive heterosexuality and wanting Firestar’s approval convinced himself that he “in love” with Squirrelpaw and Squirrelpaw’s own denial and guilt of her own sexuality just went along with it ((she totally had a thing for Feathertail))Anyways blah blah journey stuff - main replacement is Leafpool fell in love with Mothwing instead of Crow and Moth was trans so she’s the eventually other parent of the trio Tigerclaw continues to train the brothers in the dark forest but this time Hawkfrost doesn’t eat up his manipulation because he develops love for Ashfur and holds bitterness @ his father for murdering Ashfur’s mother and all the angry feelings of his father never being around for him and blaming Tadpool’s death on the absence of his father etc etc Hawkfrost DOES still want him and Bramble to become like a Thunderclan and Riveclan leadership duo like he’s still ambitious and bulheaded at times - just not bloodthirsty like Tigerclaw wants them to beSquirrel flight is offended by bramble’s friendship with Hawkfrost and they have their big fight and hangs out with other ppl, Ashfur 100% sees her a niece in this canon and is just protective over her like he is with his sister Leafpool and Mothwing do the run away thing - Hawkfrost distraught that his sister is gone goes to Thunderclan to get Bramble to help, Squirrelflight lashes out on them, but Firestar intervenes wanting the safety of his daughter and says he’ll let Bramble go look for Hawkfrost, Squirrel protests a little but calms down when Ashfur offers to go with them as well ((no one knows of Hawk and Ashfur’s relationship))Leafpool gets the dreams of Thunderclan being under attack and Spottedleaf persuades her to go back Mothwing is sad about it but says they’ll always have excuses to see each other being medicine cats On their way back they’re meet with Hawk, Ash, and Bramble who are relived to see that they are safe and sound However they don’t dawdle as Leafpool gets a strong vision of Thunderclan under attack and they run to their aid Hawkfrost at first tries to argue with his sister to leave the Thunderclan cats on their own but refuses to go without helping and he relents because he wants to protect Ashfurblahblah tragedy Cinderpelt dies (cries) which seals Leafpool’s fate as being the medicine cat of Thunderclan Hawkfrost and Mothwing return home IDK prob some very Gay shit happens between Hawk and Ash during the battle idk who will see but it happens Over at Thunderclan, Firestar accepts Greystripe’s “death” and makes Bramble deputy Hawkfrost seeing his brother be named deputy and still being prideful brat wanting to be leader and adored by the clan still encourages Mothwing to make a fake sign about Stormfur and Brook but big reason for this is Hawkfrost blames Stormfur for Feathertail’s death and Feathertail was one of the few cats who was always friendly to Hawkfrost and Mothwing etc etc Tigerclaw tries to encourage his sons to be bloodthirsty and take the leaderships themselves, alone he belittles and shuns Hawkfrost into doing what he wants Hawkfrost sets up the trap for Firestar but tells Ashfur what’s going on out of guilt and asks if he will save Firestar before it’s too lateAshfur rush with Firestar’s daughters to save them but Brambleclaw and Ashfur are still fighting because they’re both conflicted on their own loyalites Ashfur pushes Brambleclaw out of the way to save Hawkfrost and gets an injury in the process with makes Hawkfrost panic as he never saw Ashfur bleed so much beforeHe willingly goes with as a poisoner because he’s afraid Ashfur to die without him and Firestar observing this eventually has a discussion with Hawkfrost when Ashfur is deemed safe Hawkfrost in emotional exhaustion and protectiveness of his mate admits to Tigerclaw training he and his brotherFirestar says he can leave and he won’t tell Riverclan of his attempt to kill him if he breaks ties with Tigerclaw Hawkfrost is conflicted but talking with Ashfur when he first awakes he reluctantly agrees to Firestar’s terms Leafpool discovers she is pregnant with Mothwing’s kits and panics telling her sister that she needs to pretend she is having Brambleclaw’s kits - Squirrelflight who was on the path to accepting she was a lesbian and not attracted to Brambleclaw finds herself back to square one and fake her own happiness with him for her sister’s safety Mothwing is aware of Leafpool’s pregnancy and is angry with the concept of clans and only wants to be with her mate, one day she vents to Hawkfrost about all of this, Mistyfoot over hears Mothwing’s (nonexistant) beliefs about starclan and tries to get Leopardstar to throw out Hawkfrost and Mothwing for “scheming” against their clan as Hawkfrost escalates with argument way too fast and Mistfoot acts like a dick bc of her anger with Hawkfrost mostly Hawkfrost and Mistyfoot have a physical fight to where Mothwing defends her brother before Mistyfoot gives him a fatal injury Feeling betrayed by Riverclan Hawkfrost no longer longs to be leader of a group of “cowards and traitors” This leads him to tell his sister that they should just go to Thunderclan and be with their mates Stormfur tries to argue that Hawkfrost is just like Tigerclaw but Firestar welcomes the siblings Hawkfrost not wanting to be around Stormfur hints that he should return to Riverclan which the two consider this or returning to the tribe Hawkfrost is very melancholy and negative, only cheered up by the presence of Ashfur, and cold toward other Thunderclan cats Mothwing eagerly tries to convince Leafpool to be truthful about their kits and it causes a lot of stress and arguments between the two- Squirrelflight over hears one of this and begs her sister to go with the truth as she doesn’t love Brambleclaw and knows Thunderclan will come to accept Leafpool Leafool eventually agrees and a lot of cats are disappointed or unhappy with her but Firestar silences their disapproval and accepts his daughter and her mate Mothwing publicly being the parent of Leafpool’s kits is what seals the deal for Hawkfrost and Mothwing staying in Thunderclan During the next big meeting Leopardstar, conflicted, tries to convince Hawkfrost and Mothwing that they belong in Riverclan and that Mistyfoot was too harsh on them But Hawkfrost very aggressively denies this suggestion, he is extremely bitter against Riverclan which gives Mothwing the courage to say no as well even though Leopardstar pleads they dont have a proper medicine cat The gathering gets very heated but Brook offers to medicine cat if Riverclan were to welcome them back and Leopardstar and Mistyfoot agree Leafpool eventually gives birth to the Trio, taking place in the nursery as Mothwing takes over being official medicine in the meantime and the clan upset that Jaykit is born blind but his mothers love him regardless Hawkfrost actually becomes a very stubborn defend of Jaykit’s potetional as a warrior Hollykit being super close to her mother’s and thus becoming very engrossed in medicine still becomes medicine cat appretience Lionpaw still gets Ashfur as a mentor but Ashfur is less of an OOC asshole Brightheart works hard with Jaypaw to use his blindness to his advantage and Hawkfrost becomes a second pseudo mentor as the clan still feels too weary about Hawkfrost to give him an appetence but it’s his sister kit and ppl believing Jaypaw cannot become a warrior bc of the blindness pisses Hawkfrost off Hawkfrost is the first to learn of Jaypaw being able to walk amongst other cats dreams but encourages him to keep him to himself as the clan would use “any excuse” to have him not be a warrior

#warrior cats au #hawkash #unedited #someone give me ideas of who squirrelflight can be a lesbian with

[crowstan]

Sanders Sides post except I haven't seen it before

Ok this post is inspired by an absolute flood of Patton and Logan in a skirt, on my Instagram, which was not anything related to any of the dnd or homestuck tags but whatever. That whole mess that happened yesterday inspired this, because as y'all know: I love analyzing things weirdly and what is blogging but analyzing your own thoughts in an odd way? Anyway, spoilers ahead because this is what I've unfortunately been leaked, which means I got this stuff via spoilers.

What is Sanders Sides? So, I actually have no idea and I want to go in bare bones because. I never get to go in with little info. All i know is that it's by Thomas Sanders (he apparently does have a tumblr, I did not look up what it was because, once again, trying to get the barest and best experience I can and I worry that may taint it in some way). All I know about Thomas is that he did vines that I really like and that he has his pronouns in all of his bio's, which so far makes him very ok in my books because I have not met one person who is in any way harmful to others who has their pronouns in their bio. Then again i don't see it often anyway but regardless. And that's literally all I know about him and Sanders Sides, so. Stuff that I have worked together with the unhealthy amount of spoilers I didn't willing get that made me want to make this. -They are all symbolic or are humanoid versions of like, different parts of someone? They're also color coded which my little color coding heart loves sm! There's morality, creativity, creativity #2: electric boogaloo, logic, anxiety, and deciet which may also be denial? not sure about the last bit. -Morality's (moralities?) name is Patton, and his color is light blue. He is the dad character and is bad with any "negative" feelings, which, mood. He is one of the sides i saw in a skirt and may be my favorite possibly, simply bc I Do Not Have Good Male Figures and he's a dad character. Name a better duo than good dad characters and my lack of any positive guys in my life that aren't my age. He's part of the "core four", whatever that means. Really likes animals? I mean that does make sense bc, morality, but also that's different for each person. overall conclusion: now my dad. (/j) -Next up: Anxiety. Name is Virgil (?), color is a shade of purple. Don't know what one bc purple is one of those colors i can't remember too well. Seems like how I imagine my anxiety but a little less focused on death. I would befriend him were in not for the fact I Cannot approach people unless I'm actually dying and even then I can't. Apparently was a "dark side" at some point but now isn't? Redemption ark ig, idk what a dark side is or if it would be equivalent enough with "evil" to have that be a redemption ark. Final conclusion: wait, is that me but cis and let loose in a hot topic? -Creativity #1. Name is Roman, color is red I think. A prince character, and I'm not sure what else to add. I think he is a theatre fan, amd also I would avoid him at all costs because as friendly as he is, we don't have the same vibes and i would panic. Definitely drinks his "respect women" juice, and it's actually "respect women" juice n not whatever the hecc it is that people who /say/ the drink "respect women" juice drinks. he'd go out of his way to make sure your drink doesn't get spiked. this man is hella good, 10/10, would trust but not talk to. -Creativity #2, apparently the brother of Roman? His name is Remus, color is green, and i say this with my full heart: I love him. he seems like the kind of person who barked at people in middle school bc he thought he was a werewolf. who drank an entire bottle of glue in kindergarten at had to go to the hospital and did it again. he's the kind of person who would offer you up a worm and tell you disturbing facts about animals and then go off and play his little games he made up with twisted scenarios. and you know what? that's amazing and i absolutely love that so much. I know nothing about him except he eats deodorant and is the embodiment of intrusive thoughts and "oh god /why/" scenarios you thought of for some reason. -Logic. Name is Logan, ah, really similar to what he represents but I mean, still a very good name. His color is dark blue, aka my favorite color besides dark grey. Really likes jam? I feel like this man has read the dictionary and has "different vocabularies" he uses for different events and people, which may be a self projection but. Def Ravenclaw vibes bc!! hear me out!! not stereotypes!! I feel this man, the literal *embodiment* of logic, would value learning and knowledge which is part of what makes a ravenclaw! so it is not self projection, it is *knowledge* (/hj). that's it, i would absolutely love to debate him sm but i feel like that would be similar to that time i talked about Quadrants with a friend for an hour and they had no idea what was going on at all.

-Last one, deceit/denial. I don't know if he's denial as i got that from a little comic that i thought was funny because it had a pun. His name is Janus (don't know how to pronounce it, been saying it like Jay-Nuhss), and his color is yellow. apparently part snake or something and!! I love snakes. Apparently was in a courtroom at one point, and we all know those are fae territory, so possibly a fae (hj). apparently has multiple arms!! which does not fit in with the snake bit, as snakes have zero arms, but regardless still cool! I know the least about him, and I'm definitely looking forward to watching him!! i love snakes sm.-

moving on from the sides slightly, apparently there's another one, who's color is orange! from someone who vaguely knows about colors but knows enough that each side more or less relates to their color, i have no idea what this side could be! best guess is it's just Thomas in a top hat. I never learned about orange because orange, yellow, some reds, and some blues are very stabby to my eyes and i will get a headache so I just. never learned it. why would i learn about a color i literally can't look at without my eyes hurting? I do know orange is a caution color, and in nature it cam be found on dangerous stuff as a "stay away!" color, and pared with black it doesn't kill my eyes and those are the Halloween colors. So maybe caution? Or some dangerous thing? It doesn't make sense, as those aren't really "sides" in the traditional sense, nor with anxiety being a sort of "caution" thing. Anyway, I would need more info on orange and, depending on how the orange color is, i may react more negatively. Like with blue Christmas lights.

-there are lots of puns!! i love puns!! i don't take the opportunity to make many, but i love them sm. just like snakes! and cats! in fact i actually know a lot about cat behavior

lmao that's literally all i have, I'll go watch the whole series and also talk about that later in smaller posts, each post being one or two episodes depending on how long it is

(ah jeez it got all messed up again, under maintenance!! sorry about that!! the tags got all mixed around too!!)

(update #2: still messed up but I'll need to not use my tablet to fix it, which i can't do rn! sorry y'all :(!! )

#oh yeah my brain makes the wrong soup a lot!! yeah I've kinda adapted to it no worries! #oh ok! i hope you... brain makes better soup. #and then you get a feeling of #sanders sides #ts spoilers #i dont know if im tagging these right? #i sure hope i am #spoilers are not good for your soul unless you want them! #also format is funky #that's because i had to write it in note #on my tablet #and post this using the desktop version of tumbler #also on my tablet #which is really buggy and likes to mess things up a lot #date is December first 2020 #to be fair about sanders sides i have never actually watched it but I've seen a lot of it and seeing patton in a skirt? #listen #*everyone* looks good in a skirt ok #it just clicked that it was thomas sanders #and i loved his vines #and imo that is hella quality content and so? i had to watch #weird ass logic but i mean. pretending my anxiety is just my a humanoid version of my brain and it keeps making soup #but the bad kind of soup #helps me somehow #and them i immediately panic and have a small lock down about the interaction #did they understand what i meant?? did i confuse them?? am i faking it?? isn't it more of a gravy?? what if they hate me?? oh no they're pr #n then oh n o" for the next five hours #or until something like that happens again #which it will #because it simply *will not* shut up

[wondersbeyondcompare]

PLEASE READ THROUGH THE WHOLE POST BEFORE WATCHING THE VIDEO ABOVE;;;;; I WANTED TO HAVE IT AT THE END, BUT APPARENTLY I CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS

THIS IS JUST A SAMPLE CLIP TOO;;; NOT THE WHOLE THING

OC Introduction Videos

So, y’know the voice claim hype got me thinking... “Hey, this reminds me a lot of the Twst character intro videos!”

like this

So then my next train of thought was... what if I made introduction videos featuring everyone’s Twst OCs! (・∀・) And before anyone says anything, don’t worry, I think I’ll be able to take care of most of the hard parts.

I already made templates for all the dorms! (Also, if anyone has a clear screenshot of the outside of Ignihyde, could you send that to me? (´；Д；`) I tried to sharpen the one I got from the video, and it doesn’t look too bad but...) 

So all you need to send me are:

1. A bust-up/waist-up sprite or drawing (something I can easily edit into a transparent png plz (´；ω；`)) of your OC(s)

(Don’t worry too much about the quality of your art! Or if the drawing is digital or traditional!)

2. Their name

3. Their name in katakana (there are some katakana charts online that could help you out with this)

4. Their year (1st year/2nd year/etc.)

5. Their birthday

6. Their height

7. Their age

8. A clip of their voice claim (about 5-8 seconds plz; it can be a little bit under or over, but not a full minute) AND THE NAME OF THEIR VOICE CLAIM

A translation of the clip would be helpful! But it’s not required!

9. Their dorm (All 7 dorms are included plus Ramshackle dorm; 🤲 please don’t hesitate to send me your MC OCs as well)

10. What blog you want tagged on the video post

PLEASE READ:

- If your OC has any “???” for things like their age/birthday or anything else, that’s fine 😆I have an OC that’s like that too.

- Each person can send up to 5 OCs; I can definitely be persuaded to do more than 5, but please don’t go into the double digits _(:3 」∠)_ I can only take so much...

- If you have an idea of a voice claim but you don’t have the voice clip, I can try to download it for you as long as you show me which video it appears in

- There can be characters with the same voice claim/twisted inspiration, but they must have different lines; I’ll check in on both users if this ever happens; don’t worry, I’ll try not to put characters w/ the same voice claim back to back in the videos

- If you don’t have a voice claim for your character but still want to be in the video 👍 That’s okay; just make sure to tell me

- If any of you already made the little intro card for your OCs, you can just send that to me along with the rest of the stuff I’ve requested! 🥺🙏 What a saving grace...

- I want to do fan dorms/schools too, but I also want to see how much attention this post gets 1st before jumping into that! I’ll make a separate post for that if this post does well!

- I’ll make a separate post for staff OCs too!

- If you’re sending me your stuff via reblog, plz don’t chain reblog! I don’t want to clog everyone’s feed, so just respond to this post, and don’t add on to someone else’s submission!

- And if you want to send your stuff through email or other social media, I can do that too; just DM me if that’s the case

- Or just DM me your stuff!

- Don’t worry if we’ve never interacted before (it’s probably my fault b/c I suck at interactions... 😢); I just want to showcase the many lovely OCs this fandom has made so far!

- Shoot me a message if you have any other questions!

- And please don’t yell at me if you see me posting stuff other than the videos (´；ω；`) I need a break sometimes, y’know?

- Don’t be rude to others or diss their OCs. I will drop kick you to the moon; I have no tolerance for that kind of negativity

- Reblogs just to boost this are appreciated!

I have a small clip of what I expect each part to look like (featuring my idiot boy Kodi)! 

yes you can scroll to the top now

Once all the students are introduced, it’ll end the way the Twst intro videos did! This clip was just abrupt b/c it’s just my tool of a son right now 😔

I’ll leave the submissions open until the end of June! Might close it a bit earlier if I get a lot of OCs (I’m a pretty small blog, tho, so Idk about that...), might extend it if I don’t get that many responses. If you need more time gathering everything/help, just tell me!

#twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland oc #twst oc #writing #mun taro speaks #this is saved as dumb plan for my dumb blog in my notes app #if you watched the video before reading the post #then yes kodi's apparently the only octavinelle student at nrc lol #my art #my post #edits #video #Malleus #Kodi

[seijorhi]

asks

fair warning, a lot of this is about shitty discourse :/

ignore the antis, they are either actually children or just really dumb with a severely warped sense of reality. You and your writings are a gift to this world (also I hope you’re recovering well and getting lots of rest post surgery)!!!

i don’t even care that they don’t like it or think that i’m gross for writing it or whatever, just let me do it in fucking peace you know? i tag my stuff responsibly, it’s not under the main tags, you can’t find it unless you go looking for it. because i’m not gonna change their minds and they sure as fuck aren’t gonna change mine but it’s just frustrating to see hate again and again in my inbox.

also thank you, you’re a gem 💕

People must be bored that they started attacking you guys again. Anyways, I love you, Rhi and do I see an alternate AU for Inarizaki manager fic????? 👀👀👀👀👀👀

... honestly i’m low key tempted with the atsumu/kita/manager idea but i have so much other writing to do first so idk

i love your content so much holy shit don’t let anyone/anything makes u feel bad you’re 💯 - @arixtsukki

thank you, bby! 💕💕💕

Rhi I just want to tell you I'm so sorry for your shitty week I hope you get better soon and antis just need to go away nobody cares about their stupid opinions. -_-  

- @pokemonfreak666

bby, you have my heart, thank you sm 🥺

onLY LOVE FOR RHI 🥰🥰😍😍😍😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰🥰😘😘😘

I LOVE U BBY COME GET UR KISSES!!!

Its been an awful week for you but know we see your struggle and love and support you hundreds or thousands of miles away love you UwU

ahhh thank you so much, sweetheart!!!

Honestly i'm so fucking tired of people saying the same damn thing about haikyuu and bnha. THEY. ARE. NOT. REAL. Even their laws and physics doesn't apply to us (and vice versa) because??? THEYRE NOT REAL. NONE OF IT. If u're one of those people that says "fiction can affect reality", u're the one that needs to go and touch some fucking grass. (sorry for the rant rhi)

it’s the same shit that resurfaces every few weeks and i’m tired of seeing it, tired of explaining the same stuff to people who don’t care and won’t listen and frankly just want me to feel bad for the content i produce and consume and i am over it :) 

YOU'RE AN AMAZING WRITER AND ALL THOSE NEGATIVE PEOPLE CAN GET THEIR STOOPID ASSES OUT OF HERE. IF U DONT LIKE WHAT SOMEONE WRITES THEN JUST.. BLOCK THEM, ITS THAT SIMPLE. KEEP DOING WHAT YOU'RE DOING BABES, YOU'RE AMAZING. - @aslutforsuna

honestly i cannot believe that 2020 is almost over and these dumbasses still don’t know how to use a block button smh

Rhi, could I ask for another pov for the soulmate twins au? 👉👈 I just really loved the last one

like you want me to write the fic from the pov of one of the twins?

I’m ok with Atsumu living in ur mind cuz he lives in my mind too and when u post u just fuel my love for him so keep going( but only if u wish to) also why would people read stuff they don’t like than bash people. It’s basically saying an opinion is right and everyone against it is wrong

haha, i don’t think i’ll ever be over atsumu so i’m glad y’all are here for it. and thanks bby, like i said it’s a shitty thing and i’m very tired of seeing it directed at me and my dc moots :/

"wRiTing dArk fIcs wilL nOt help yOu coPe w/ yOur trAuma but hey I'm gonnA buLLy yOU and thReAten you and aDD another trAuma"

-every single fucking hater ever

also let’s not forget that pestering people about their trauma and invalidating how they choose to cope with an deal with that is super fucking hurtful but n e ways 👀

I just now read invidia and I was kind of happy you used that title, bcs envy literally translates as invidia (as I'm in a latin country).

it was my sleep deprived attempt to be *fancy* but i’m glad it made you happy hahah

i re-read breaking point and meet the parents version of it and rhi... especially tension on the meet the parents part is 10/10. i love it. thanks for writing!

ahh thank you, bby! glad you liked them <3

Why isn't your bd every month?? 😩

a question i ask myself every day, anon

#ask #BD answers #tw discourse

[bellatrixobsessed1]

Okay so tumblr did something super weird with the formatting and I couldn’t fix it; for some reason it had the page cut under the ask itself (as if the ask itself had the page cut in it) so I literally couldn’t edit it out and re-format it right. So I just took a screencap of the ask and I’ll respond via a standard textpost.

Gonna give a little warning because I’m gonna be talking about child abuse a bit.

Glad to hear it, anon. :) I try to keep an open mind with these discussions.

Tbh, I kinda get uncomfortable with some of the stuff I've seen in her tag regarding Zuko especially. I've seen a handful of people kind of dismissing him as being whiny or sensitive, and I just don't really vibe with that. I don't have anything against any of the people I've seen posting it, but I just don't vibe with.

I'm also gonna take the opportunity to try to break some of the misconceptions about the Azula fandom by saying that I don't feel afraid or intimidated to kinda go against a good portion of the fandom in a sense. And that's because, fellow Azula fans have never really outcast me or tried to fight me for saying that I think that Azula's a bit of an abuser. The Azula fandom imo, isn't full of bullies and hateful people; everyone I have talked to has been very open to a nice discussion. I think that it just depends how you approach them with your arguments.

All of that said, Imma get back on topic here; It’s a little tough to talk about Azula's flaws sometimes because I feel like (though, thankfully this hasn’t happened on tumblr to me yet) that some people take pointing out flaws in your faves as bashing them or posting hate.

But honestly this is really cool to hear because back when I first opened up this blog I used to do that thing where I’d justify everything that my faves did, which was a bit of a problem because my faves are all antagonists! xD So there has been a lot of progress made.

I think that there are three main reasons that people have a hard time admitting that she’s an abuser too.

I think that the biggest one is that a lot of Azula fans lately have been massively on the defensive. There has been quite a bit of hate in her tag, there have been things said by the writers (taken the wrong way or not), there have been a lot of generalizations, and so on. And all of it kind of puts fans on the defensive. I see so many posts about how Azula is irredeemable and just the worst, most evil character in the show and so people kind of swing hardcore the other way (Azula did nothing wrong) to make up for all of the demonizing she gets. One extreme usually leads to another. Seeing Azula get so much shit, like being called a killer and a sadist, provokes the Azula is a cinnamon roll reaction. Basically when a fandom gets put on blast for being 'the crazy' or 'mean' side of the fandom, I feel like it creates a cycle where that part of the fandom starts to actually act meaner because they feel backed into a corner. The more they are called 'delusional' for seeing good in Azula the more radically they will start to defend that belief until the shades of grey start disappearing, if that makes sense.

But this is just a theory of course.

The second reason I think that people tend to dismiss the things she does do wrong is that there's this association with criticism and hate. And this goes beyond the Avatar fandom. In general I feel like people find it hard to say bad things about their favorite characters because they feel like they're bashing their character and/or they don't want people to think that they are being negative. Plus it's just kinda hard to say bad things about something you like/love. Speaking as someone who used to do this; I always felt really weird about or like I was being negative when admitting that things I like have flaws. I'm not exactly sure why I used to feel like this because it wasn't an, 'I seem myself in this character, so insulting them is like insulting me' thing because I usually have almost nothing in common with my faves. Idk, it's just always been way easier for me to find things I like in a character I hate than it is for me to find things I don't like in a character that I do. On a personal level, it might just be because I'd rather focus on liking things that I like than hating things that I hate?

I guess that I think that it's just easy to forget that 'I don't like xyz aspect of Azula' is not the same as 'I don't like Azula at all'. I think that it's possible to love a character but not love everything about them, just like real people; you can love your mom to death but there will always be those things about her that drive you nuts.

And really, imo, I think that fans who are able to see flaws with their faves are the ones who understand them the best. I'm definitely not saying that the people who don't see/acknowledge their fave's flaws don't understand their fave. But I think that they are missing out on very crucial aspects of their favorite character. If you like a character you should like them for what they are in canon, not what you want them to be or what they could be.

I see a lot of potential for growth in Azula. I see potential for a redemption arc and I do love what her character can be. But I also love her character as is. Currently in canon, she's manipulative and goal driven to the point where she has a disregard for people. Currently she's an antagonist and I love her for that. Because antagonist, unredeemed Azula is the character I liked in the beginning. I don't condone her being manipulative and I don't like that as a personality trait. But I do love it as far as, she is a fantastically written antagonist. And those cold, manipulative, abusive traits add to her complexity when juxtaposed against her own abuse, insecurities, and need to be loved.

And that's kind of what I mean when I say that, if you like Azula, you should like her despite the flaws.  If that makes sense. I feel like people who say that she isn't an abuser (at least to some degree) kind of have a misunderstanding of her character. I think that one of the points of her character is to show that some abused kids don't come out okay. It's a tragic reality.

But with Azula I think that there's still room for her to change and start to break that cycle. I feel like she'd have a much harder time doing it than Zuko, because she has been subjected to his mental abuse in close range for much longer than he has. And I think that it would be something she'd struggle with her whole life, but I see good in her.

That said, I think that the third reason people have trouble seeing her as an abuse is because it is just really hard to see abuse victims become the abuser. I've mentioned before, but I come from a family where the chain ended with one of my parents. Said parent has told me many times how hard it was to fight that kind of upbringing. That's the real tragedy of abuse, it just goes on and on until you're mentally strong enough to fight yourself and break that chain. And the sad thing is, that some people just can't seem to do that. And I think that when discussing Azula, this comes into play a bit; it's just hard to look at even a fictional abuse victim and knowledge that they've become the abuser because it is all that they have known.

It's just a really hard topic and  that's why it's so easy for discourse like this to get heated; a lot of people have an Azula in their lives or relate to her in some way.

Thanks for the ask, sorry it took so long to reply! I wanted to make it thoughtful and word everything the best that I can.

As always, everyone is welcomed to chime in and give their own opinions.

EDIT: There are a few things that I don’t think I was clear enough on with the initial post lol. First and foremost, I’m definitely not saying that these three reasons are the only reasons people don’t talk about Azula’s flaws. @wingsfreedom​ made a good point about differing ways of interpreting scenes. That’s another biggy. 

The other thing I want to clarify is that I don’t think that Azula is a full on abuser. I think that she displays tendencies and does some abusive things. But I also don’t put her on the same level as Ozai. I feel like she’s a bit more merciful than him. Like Ozai is pretty much too far gone; he’s an abuser and his mind is set there. Azula, I think still has the capacity to break the chain. She’s not a lost cause. I also feel like she can be reasoned with more than Ozai. Ozai is all about power; Azula is motivated more by desperation (be it for her father’s love, to keep the last bit of control she has, and to keep her friends). It still leads to that harmful behavior, but I don’t think that she’s a lost cause like Ozai. Like, she has some abusive tendencies now, but I can also see her being able to break the chain under the right conditions.  If that makes sense. 

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