#idk i wanna draw more about this topic.

[skiespaintedblue]

If ur romantic f/o has any siblings, they're ur in law(s) now!!! How do you feel about them? How do they feel about you? What does your f/o think about you guys? Do you hate eachother, or are you friends?

#selfship #selfship community #self shipping #fictional other #selfship imagines #sort of #idk what tags to use aaaa #hope people see this post tho #i really wanna get more integrated into the selfship community cause i just like. reblog stuff #i wanna b friends with people!! if anyone is looking for selfship mutuals hmu #its probably cause i dont make much actual content. i should draw more stuff #but anyway about the actual topic of the post dgfjgkd #this came up for me cause i was thinking about leo and was like hey if hes markus's brother doesnt that make him my brother in law #and i was like :0 #fuck yeah we'd vibe so well together fr!! #im convinced we'd be besties even if i wasnt in love with his brother #we both got that tboy swag ykwim #platonic t4t? is that a thing? idk #but yeah we'd get along great. markus would be happy about it too until we started doing some stupid shit then he'll regret everything #i also have brother in laws on connors end w nines and sixty #honestly. i think realistically id be scared of sixty #he'd torment me i know he would #if i yawned around him he'd stick his finger down my throat #fucking spawn of satan #nines would be very different #i think it might be a bit awkward at first bc. youre sticking two bitches with social anxiety in a room together #one of which barely speaks #but i think eventually we'd get along just fine :D #id prolly enjoy going shopping with them. nines just feels like a good person to shop with #maybe ill make a post for parental in laws too cause i havent thought about hank and carl as much

[vampstel]

I forgot I was gonna talk about this oops but here we are. Let’s go!! The Gender Talk™️ below the cut so be warned!!

I have a very complicated relationship with gender and it’s something I’ve always wanted to discuss to other people but never get the chance to. I tell people I’m trans and leave it there but I’m more than just that. To be more specific, I partially identify as a male. I don’t feel a full connection to manhood and it’s always left me feeling confused about my identity because I’m still in that toxic mindset that I *need* to be completely in the binary or completely out of it to be a “real trans person”

It’s a ridiculous notion I’ve had ever since I was young and its damaged my perception of my identity. My perception only gets worse when you consider I’m neurodivergent… societal norms and gender roles are not a thing I understand and I won’t pretend I do. I’ve always felt like an outcast and had little to no feeling about who I am until I turned 14. Even then, at 17 I still struggle.

But only recently have I come to terms that I’m not completely in the binary or out of it. I’ve adopted the label “demiboy” because of this.

The best way I can describe my gender is that I’m masculine. I’m a boy, but not entirely. My gender’s almost fluid, in a way. Some days I feel more masculine, other days I simply have no gender. You could argue it’s counterintuitive of me to feel connected to one gender yet feel like I lack gender but that’s simply how I am and I’m slowly growing to accept it.

I’m guessing you can tell where this is going. I’ve been dealing with internalized transphobia again. My dysphoria often manifests as apathy and dissociation which leads me to doubting my identity. It’s stupid and I hate it. Then with that doubt comes with scary thoughts of detransitioning (which is funny in hindsight because… if I’m scared of detransitioning cause I don’t want to be a cis woman, isn’t that solid proof I’m trans?)

So, as a way to cope, I’m trying to remind myself that detransitioning (that happening to me is unlikely but still) is perfectly fine. That should be making me feel reassured instead of scared. If I was wrong about my identity then shucks. That’s part of the journey and that’s okay??

Two things for sure though: I hate my voice and I hate my chest. Not only do they make me dysphoric, my chest gives me a lot of issues and leaves me overstimulated. Love being neurodivergent lol. Can’t wait to get top surgery someday.

On a different tangent: While I still feel doubt about my identity, I honestly don’t get affected by transphobia and it’s very odd to me? But thank goodness. I get transphobic comments a lot even as a small content creator and I’ve laughed at all of them without fail. I dunno,, it’s funny when strangers think I give a shit whether or not they think my identity is valid. I know who I am and that’s what matters. I don’t need validation from anyone but myself.

Anyway that’s all I have to share bye bye ^^ I’m still sick jsjsjs

#꒰ v’s rambling ꒱ #• about: personal/miscellaneous #I wanna make a video about this someday #maybe during pride month Idk #anyway… so I’ve been drawing a lot #and also been coming up with video ideas #I’m more productive when I’m sick apparently #that was completely off topic but yeah

[aaagustd]

for the night | min yoongi

title: for the night

pairing: drug lord!min yoongi x waitress!(f)reader

genre/rating: angst, childhood best friends to strangers to friends??, unrequited love, valentine’s day au, smut, romance, 18+

summary: Yoongi lives a dangerous life. So why is he so afraid of you? 

warnings: idk what to say about these two, just a bunch of feelings (spoken & unspoken), light pining, pov switches,  mentions d*ath & grieving,  mentions dr*gs and violence, swearing, bl**d & injuries, p*stol wh*pping/ mild description of t*rture, crooked justice systems (it’s the wild wild west out there), mentions a robbery & a**ault (nothing involving the main story), mentions illnesses & health related topics, alcohol/drinking but no intoxication unless you count staring at yoongi for too long, black hair with the undercut yoongi, chains, rings, TATTOOS…. oh my !!!, yoongi has a gl*ck (a piece, that iron… whatever you wanna call it), everybody’s shipping these two but they’re just…yeah, eye f*cking from both parties, explicit content, the friend version of kiss & makeup??, dry h*mping, Dom!yoongi, yoongi getting head is a warning, protected s*x, gagging/deep throating, throat/face f*cking, hair pulling, crying, i’m sure yoongi has Sir kink hiding in there somewhere, manhandling, face slapping, yoongi’s fingers down your throat, missionary with your leg over yoongi’s shoulder, big d*ck!yoongi, his jewelry stays on bc why would it not?, cl*t stimulation, teasing, spitting, org*sm control, c*m shots, body worship, p*ssy eating, throat grabbing, i think that's all...

wc: 11.6k

release date: february 16, 2024; 10:15pm est

note: sorry i took forever. this is my first oneshot in a while so i apologize for mistakes. i'm just finding my footing in this writing thing again. thanks to @itaeewon for my banner and @cafekitsune who makes these pretty dividers. please follow both of them for cool graphics. anyway, happy late valentine's day. i love you guys.

masterlist | playlist | ao3 version

“Enjoy the rest of your night… and be safe!”

As you wave goodbye to the last lovely couple dining at your restaurant tonight, you express how thrilled you are of their return. 

You stand in front of your father’s little restaurant and watch the lovebirds bundle up as they make their way to their vehicle, embracing each other and protecting themselves from the same frigid temperatures that threatened to ruin their Valentine’s day plans.

It’s nights like these that make the sacrifice of putting your nursing career on hold well worth it. This neighborhood doesn’t have a lot to offer as far as entertainment goes, so keeping this place in business is your top priority. This is your home, and the people you love put their all into this establishment. 

You’ll make sure it thrives and continues to be a source of comfort to the community.

You’re excited to tell your father about tonight’s turn out. You know he will be pleased. It’s been busy all day with dine-ins and take outs; everyone looking for the perfect date night meal. 

“The food is made with love,” is what your dad always says.

He always looks forward to this time of year, and he’s always talked about seeing you sitting in one of his booths with a special someone of your own some day. 

You only nod when he brings up your dating life; sometimes his love for you blinds him from reality. You’ve never brought anyone home, or ever mentioned being involved with someone to him. Even if you came out and said it, he’d never believe you’re the problem.

A chilly breeze in the mid-February air snaps you out of your thoughts—so as soon as the couple’s sedan departs from the parking lot—you slip back inside. 

The warmth instantly envelopes your trembling figure, and draws a small exhale from your lips.

Looking at your watch, you notice that it’s almost midnight. You switch the sign from open to close, but don’t bother locking the door because there’s one more visitor that should be arriving shortly.

You keep that in mind as you begin to clean the front of the house. 

One by one, your father’s employees complete their duties in a haste, then clock out so they can go home to whoever is waiting for them. Their eagerness only brings a smile to your face.

As you’re sanitizing a table, you catch a glimpse of one of the waitresses dashing towards the door.

“Well, see you tomorrow, Kaci!”

She halts, then turns around to say her goodbyes—and to gossip. 

“Night, boss lady,” she chirps.

Why she calls you “boss lady” is a mystery to you; your dad only left you in charge, but you’re just a manager. You still get on the floor and serve tables like everyone else.

You’re curious about the bit of mischief hidden in her tone. It’s not long before she reveals her true intentions.

“Did he stop by yet?”

And of course…she’s talking about Yoongi.

Usually, someone stops by on his behalf to collect the rent. His family allows your father and a few others to occupy the buildings on this lot for business. Payment is always to be paid in cash, so you make sure you visit the bank the morning of collections. 

Your family has had a close relationship with the Mins for years, so they’ve been working with you while your father recovers.

You met Yoongi right in this restaurant at the young age of four, and from there, your friendship blossomed. You were inseparable throughout grade school, but senior year is when everything shifted.

It had to be the first time you both realized that you were on different paths after graduation. While you prepped for college, he was being introduced to the hustle that built his family’s empire.

If that didn’t tear a rift in your relationship, the underlying tension and unspoken feelings surely did. People used to always say at least one of you would eventually want something different, and you used to always laugh at them…until it became a fact.

You’ve always wondered if he ever felt the same as you did—or if he ever thought about exploring something more.

Unfortunately, you’ll never know what he was feeling. After graduation, he shut you out and never looked back. That was so long ago, though. You’ve grown, and the pain of losing someone you cared about eventually went away.

…So you thought.

Being home again brings back so many memories and forgotten feelings. Things you wish you still had, and things you wish you could have had. After experiencing so much throughout college, and learning more about yourself, you’d kill to go back in time so you can handle things differently. 

You can’t help but think your friendship was torn apart by nothing more than a curious mind and raging hormones.

Yoongi’s so different now, though. However, you still see glimpses of the boy who would sneak into your window just to watch reruns of 90s cartoons with you. You smile just thinking about all the fun times you’ve shared, and all the trouble you got into.

“Look at you getting wet just thinking about him! I knew it. You’re whipped!”

“Can you keep your damn voice down,” you hiss. “Last thing I need is gossip right now.”

You’re so fed up with her teasing. If you two hadn’t just clicked when you took over the restaurant, you’d probably just kick her ass out in the cold.

“And, no. He has not. So, you can leave now, ma’am.”

“Oh, for sure,” she sighs dramatically. “Hell only knows what you two do when you are alone.”

Your jaw drops. 

Sometimes this bond you share is a blessing; but other times, it’s a curse.

Kaci’s a sweetheart, but her mouth… Well, let’s just say these comments are normal for her. 

And just like your father, she loves to play Cupid. No wonder he hired her.

“Just get your ass out of here.”

You can barely keep your laugh from bursting through your lips as you send a rag flying towards her. She dodges it, then proceeds to give you a middle finger. She has another shady comment ready to roll off the tip of her tongue, but then she glances out of the glass door and smirks instead. 

You scoff. “Bitch, what is it now?”

Kaci then shakes her head. 

“Nothing, babe. I’m out,” she winks. Kaci then points towards the parking lot and whispers, “Daddy’s here.”

“Huh? What are you talking about—”

Crawling into one of the booths, you partially open the blinds with your fingers and peek out of the window.

About seven sets of headlights stare back at you, all belonging to vehicles that are as dark as the midnight hour. A BMW sits in the center, blacked out with tinted windows and black custom rims. However, you don’t need a look inside to know who it is. No one else would pull up like they own the lot.

All the businesses are closed, which means these aren’t customers. It’s the boss.

Your heart rate builds up when the door opens and his sneakers touch the concrete. He stands there for a moment fixing his jacket and discreetly observing his surroundings. 

Your eyes follow his movements. You can only hear the bass from his music and the noises coming from your throat as you try to gulp down the saliva building up in your mouth. 

All you needed to see was the top of his head to confirm what you already knew. 

Yoongi’s here, and he’s the one coming to collect payment tonight.

You don’t know why your heart is about to pound out of your chest like you’re hexed by some teenage crush. Maybe you are still hung up on him a little bit. You can’t deny how attractive he still is. He definitely wears age well.

The dark hair suits him perfectly. You can remember the horror stories about the color experiments gone wrong when you were teenagers. It’s a surprise that it’s still luscious and healthy as it is.

However, that isn’t the only thing that has changed in his appearance.

They’re hard to spot under his jacket, but his torso, back, and arms are covered in tattoos. You only know about this because another waitress working here loves to share the story of how she was on her knees in a bathroom giving a shirtless Yoongi a blowjob. 

You would never admit jealousy, but damn; that lucky bitch.

Yoongi starts to make his way across the parking lot, pushing back his hair with his ringed-fingers to grant better vision out of his peripherals. You know he’s always watching his back; he can never be too careful when he’s making moves.

His haircut allows you to get a glimpse of the ink crawling up his neck, disappearing behind his ear. His earring dangles in the wind as he strides in your direction.

Each step is confident and dominant;  his aura dark and mysterious. 

A man who is about his business, it’s no shock that heads turn when he steps into the room. He’s reserved, but not afraid to enforce his authority when he deems necessary. You heard stories, and crossing Yoongi is considered a death wish. 

He’s like the hot badass described in movies or books, but he actually is that guy. Handsome, street-wise, tattoos and scars; paired with money, jewelry, and you’d be stupid to think he isn’t packing. 

You can smell the power and Dior emitting from his body all the way from where you are. 

Each step he takes towards the entrance of the restaurant gives you a better view without being noticed. It’s a sin how good he looks and he’s just wearing a simple outfit with some sneakers. You have no business feeling these kinds of things, but it’s impossible to not.

“Can he just bend us over already?”

You hear Kaci whisper the same words you were just thinking. But she can’t know that, so you swat her again for good measure.

“Fine…I’m leaving,” she whines, walking to the door.

You back out of the booth and move over to the host stand so you can roll silverware and act like you weren’t watching him.

Kaci opens the door just as he’s about to reach for the handle, and of course, she gives him a warm welcome.

“Hi, Yoongi,” she beams. You roll your eyes the second you hear that annoying high-pitched voice she uses when she’s being coy.

“Hey, can you hang back for a bit? It won’t be long.”

“Yeah, sure. Everything okay?”

The look he gives her sends your radar up, so you set down the utensils in your hand and join them in the lobby.

“Hey,” you greet him when he notices you. “What’s going on?”

Yoongi sighs before he answers, shaking his head as he gathers his words.

“You know the alterations shop over there?” 

His head nods in the direction of the Leonard’s shop a few stores down. Both of you nod because they take lunch breaks here everyday.

“Somebody hit them up about an hour ago. Left their daughter in bad shape before they stripped the registers,” he informs.

“Are you serious? That’s awful.”

“Yeah, they’re good people. Who would do something that disgusting?” Kaci asks.

Yoongi only shrugs. “Don’t know, but as soon as I find out…”

He doesn’t even need to continue. It’ll be bad; probably worse than you can imagine. One thing the Min’s don’t tolerate is disrespect. You mess with one of their people, you get handled. In this case, you can’t even feel bad for the bastard. That family doesn’t bother anyone. It’s a shame they were targeted.

“Anyway, I don’t want either of you lingering around here at night anymore. Stick together during opening and closing until we catch this motherfucker understand?”

“Yeah, got it,” you reply, and Kaci also agrees.

“Sure, not a problem.”

With everyone on the same page, you make a note in your mind to update the security system in the restaurant and think of some safety tips for employees. No one can ever be too careful, especially after what just occurred so close to home.

“And Kaci?” he calls, just as she’s getting ready to depart. 

“Yeah?”

“Don’t walk home. Your pepper spray is expired. Ask one of the guys to drive you.”

“Is Hoseok out there?” 

You and Yoongi share a look. He’s probably wondering what it’s about, but then again, who doesn’t know they’re fucking?

“Yeah…he is—”

“Kay, bye!”

Before the door slams in your face, you call out to her. 

“Text me when you’re home!... Or when you’re able to use your hands.”

Yoongi chuckles as the both of you watch her dash across the lot. You aren’t sure how she’s able to spot the right SUV, but she does within seconds.

“This has been going on for a while, huh?” Yoongi inquires.

“Mhm. Fight, fuck, repeat.”

After a moment goes by, you realize you forgot to bring the money you owe Yoongi. You snap your fingers when you remember why he’s there in the first place.

“Oh, yeah. Come on, it’s back here,” you tell him.

Yoongi follows you toward the back of the restaurant until you reach the small manager’s office tucked in a corner of the kitchen. While you dig in your apron for the key, Yoongi checks in with you to see how everything’s going.

“How’s your dad?”

You pause to look at him and answer with a proud smile. Your father’s been working really hard on his road to recovery; it’s nice to talk about his accomplishments without someone looking at you with pity, which Yoongi never does.

“He’s been doing better. Lots of physical therapy, but he walked on his own yesterday.”

With a nod, Yoongi’s expression softens.  “That’s the shit I like to hear.”

“Me too.”

Once you find the keys, you unlock the door and the both of you step inside the dark room.

“Thanks,” you whisper when he flips the lightswitch for you. 

You can feel him watching you as you walk around the desk, and when you squat down to open the safe underneath, you hear his footsteps approaching. 

You start entering the combination while he whistles and looks around your office. 

You’re curious about what he’s looking at, but right now you can't even take a peek without him noticing. Instead, you focus on gathering the cash you owe him for last month and this month while he’s busy snooping around.

After a while, you figure he’s found something interesting because the room becomes quiet. You grab the stack you set aside and close the safe, making sure it’s locked before you do anything else.

“So how was your day?”

Yoongi’s deep voice tears a giant rift in the silence, startling you and causing you to bump your head on the edge of the desk. Thankfully, his back is turned and he didn’t hear the small thud because you’d be beyond embarrassed.

“It was okay,” you reply as you regain your footing. 

Yoongi turns in your direction when he hears your words become clearer, indicating you’re no longer digging around in the safe. He meets you halfway and you extend your hand with the stack of money resting between your fingers. 

“This is all of it.”

Yoongi looks at the stack before he responds. Most of the time, it’s so hard to know what he’s thinking because his expression is always so stoic.

“Just okay?” he quizzes. 

“Yeah, pretty much. It was busy so I was stuck in autopilot most of the day.”

He still hasn’t made a move to accept the money. You feel kind of awkward being so close to him as is, and his lack of response makes you feel even more anxious. 

Finally, he speaks. “Do you even have this to give me?”

“Yeah, we’re good. Please, take it.”

You gesture for him to take the money, and he reaches for it, making you believe he’s going to grab it.

“It’s all here. If you want me to count it, I—”

“Don’t worry about it,” he insists.

“What do you mean?”

“Exactly what I said,” he shrugs.

“Yoongi, no. We haven’t paid in a month. My dad would already be mad at me for being behind.”

“Does he have to know?” The look Yoongi gives you reminds you of all the times he’s talked you into doing something wild. He’d always take the blame if you got caught, but the thrill always made getting grounded irrelevant to you. “Keep it. We’re good until he gets back, okay?”

“Yoongi, I can’t.”

“You can’t?”

“I won’t,” you declare confidently.

“So you’re arguing with me?”

Your eyes widen, realizing that he wasn’t giving you an option.

“I-I’m sorry. I was just—”

“Don’t worry about it, alright? Just keep doing what you’re doing. I only hear good things about this place,” he concludes.

“Okay, ok. Thanks, Yoongi.”

“Don’t mention it.”

As you’re returning the money to the safe, Yoongi brings something to your attention.

“I don’t see your car outside.”

“Ah, shit. It needed to be serviced. I was supposed to pick it up on my lunch, but I forgot.”

After visiting the bank this morning, you dropped your vehicle off at the dealership for maintenance, but the breakfast rush swarmed in as soon as you arrived at work. By the time you thought about picking it up, it was well after business hours.

“Um, do you mind—”

“Wanna ride?” Yoongi offers.

“Please.” Relieved, you exhale a needed sigh. “If it’s not an inconvenience.”

“Not at all, love.”

You quickly grab your purse and switch off the light in your office, ignoring that feeling you got from the little pet name. 

Yoongi leads the way this time. As you’re following him through the restaurant, you’re sure to double check everything before you leave. Even Yoongi turns to ask you if you’ve secured everything.

“Good?”

“Yeah, everything’s turned off and we’re locked up tight.”

“Cool.”

Walking into the dining area, you give everything a quick once-over before following Yoongi to the exit. Everything looks tidy and neat how you like it so you step out into the cold night with your chauffeur. 

He waits with you while you lock the front doors, looking around for any curious eyes. After you’ve finished turning the lock and key, you give the handle a tug to make sure it doesn’t open.

Growing up in this neighborhood will teach you a thing or two about being cautious and aware of your surroundings.

“It’s freezing tonight,” you comment.

Sometimes you like to make small talk with Yoongi, see where the conversation goes. Depending on the mood he’s in, he’ll either have one sentence responses or he’ll engage in light conversation.

You don’t mention the past much. It seems like pretending it never happened is easier for both of you. However, sometimes you have an impulse to bring up the subject, or at least try to mend what’s broken. 

If that’s possible.

“Cold? This is perfect weather.”

You roll your eyes. He’s definitely fucking with you.

“Oh, whatever. You know it’s freezing out here.”

You don’t care how ridiculous you look speeding towards his car. You’re shivering and Yoongi takes forever to unlock the door.

You shuffle from foot to foot, wiggling to build up some body heat. You can hear the fabric of your jeans rubbing together due to the friction.

“You know it’s already unlocked, right?”

Oh.

You climb inside and relief washes over you. The heat is blowing warm and strong, making the leather seats even more comfortable. The seat warmers keep your butt cozy, and the vents are aiming towards your upper body. It’s perfect; you could fall asleep right here.

When Yoongi gets in the driver seat, your head lolls in his direction.

“Thank you.”

“For?” he asks.

“Your car feels like heaven right now.”

Yoongi scoffs softly.

“It isn’t always this warm. Trust me,” he replies.

“Well regardless, thanks. I appreciate it.”

“Not a problem, love.”

Fuck.

Yoongi’s engine revs as he pulls out of the parking lot. A thought comes into your mind as the vibrations travel up your body.

“Does it ever make your balls tingle?”

He coughs, clearing his throat while checking to see if he heard right.

“Uh, what?”

“The car,” you elaborate. “When you’re driving it…You don’t feel anything?”

Honestly, you’re just chatting to keep yourself from falling asleep. You don’t even expect him to answer as you stare out of the window, watching the SUVs fade in the distance.

“I guess I never really thought about it,” he responds.

You nod, vibing to the music. He’s turned the volume down since you’ve joined him, so you can actually hear each other speak.

“Hm. Sure does make your pussy tingle.”

You don’t think he heard that part. It was barely a whisper. If he did, he chose to ignore it.

“You alright?”

“Yup,” you answer. “Just ready to unwind.”

“Any plans tonight?”

You sit up in your seat, and turn to him.

“You bet.”

Yoongi laughs. “Oh, yeah?”

“I have a date with my bed, and I’m gonna let my blanket top me.”

“Gotcha. So you’re locked down, huh?”

“I wouldn’t say that.”

“Well, it sure sounds like it. I never see you having any fun.”

You give him a look. 

“Well, look who’s talking. Besides, you know I’m dealing with a lot right now.”

“Fair enough, but you’re still allowed to do something for yourself for a change. Some of us don’t have that privilege,” he replies.

“I think everyone has the privilege to do something for themselves. You just have to be selfish enough to go for it, I guess.”

“That is true.”

Yoongi then turns the music up a few notches. You already know what that means. He’s over conversation and wants to get lost in his thoughts. 

As you cruise through the streets, people may look on the surface and think this is some young bachelor taking his car for a late night drive—maybe heading to one of the city’s hot spots. 

But Yoongi is all work, and no play. If it’s not about moving product, it’s placed on the backburner.

You can relate, but tonight you’re switching it up. Self care is calling your name and you aren’t hanging up this time.

“What happened to the garden?”

You’re pulled from your thoughts by Yoongi’s voice. 

As he pulls up to the curve in front of your childhood home, he can’t stop himself from teasing you about your dying plants. You really tried your best with them, but unfortunately, you weren’t gifted with nurturing hands.

“You’re not funny,” you mutter, acting ignorant.

You know you’ve destroyed your dad’s flower bed, but he doesn’t have to make fun of you.

“I’m just saying, shouldn't you cover them?”

“I forgot!”

“You always do,” he mumbles.

You giggle as you’re opening the door; finally having a carefree conversation with your old friend again feels nice. As soon as you step out into the elements again, the winter air nips at your cheeks and you know you’ll be trembling by the time you get to your doorstep.

“Well, thanks for the ride.”

Yoongi just nods and tells you that he’d do it anytime you needed him to.

As you stand outside of the car, you start to get that feeling in your gut. That urge you know you shouldn’t have, but the temptation is stronger than ever.

Yoongi tilts his head, wondering why you’re standing in the cold. You’re frozen, silently debating on what you should do.

Ultimately, you go for it, knowing the risk you’re taking without being prepared for the aftermath. 

You’re even sure why you’re asking, or where you expect things to go. But tonight made you realize something. You miss having a best friend. 

Your best friend.

“Hey, it's late. You wanna come inside?... If you don’t have any plans.”

Regret washes over you as soon as the words leave your mouth. You weren’t ready, neither was he. You curse yourself for rushing it. The silence goes on for ages, but you’re so numb, the cold doesn’t faze you.

Finally, he gives you an answer. “You know I can’t do that.”

Well, now you know you’re the only one still holding on. By can’t, he means he won’t. 

Nodding, you lie and pretend that you understand where he’s coming from. “Yeah, I get it. Sorry about that.”

You were sure he’d be more open now that time has passed. However, you’re still stuck where you left off. He still won’t hear you out.

“There’s no need,” he assures. 

Still, you feel guilty. Selfish.

Foolish.

“Well look, I'll see you around, yeah?” He checks his phone and tosses it on the passenger seat. "I have to go deal with something."

“Okay, thanks again for the ride. Stay safe.”

You try not to look disappointed, but it’s probably no good. You’re sure he hears it in your voice. Or maybe you sound more tired than anything. You are exhausted. Maybe it’s your restless mind that's causing you to get ahead of yourself and open old wounds. It’s best you go inside before you can dig yourself a bigger hole. 

“You'll call me if you need me, right?”

If you need him… 

You always need him. He’s your rock. Well, probably not anymore. How do you learn to forget someone who’s always been there for you?

You swallow the bitterness coating your tongue before you reply. You’ll get over it. You always do. 

Just not right now.

“Yeah, I’ve tried that already. Goodnight, Yoongi.”

You shut his car door and retreat to the safety of your home. You’re unsure if he says it back or not. You walk away before he can respond. 

Everything in your sight becomes blurry as your vision is blocked by a wave of pending tears. You urgently open your front door in case he’s following you. 

A part of you wishes that he did. 

But the longer you stand there, back pressed against your front door, secluded from the same world you’ve just finished servicing—you realize that the chances of that happening are too slim to hold onto. 

Minutes go by, and you start calming down. You find your strength again, and you realize that your vulnerability made you panic. You got too comfortable, and that’s your fault. 

Tonight will just be another solo night; nothing you aren’t used to. 

You wipe your face and rid yourself of all the negative energy. Tomorrow you’ll be fine and the blow of rejection will start to fade away. Shaking your head, you clear your mind and start taking off your clothes.

You put it in your mind that you won’t hold this against Yoongi, and whenever he’s ready to talk—if ever—you’ll tell your side of the story if he wants to hear it.

Until then, you’ll just focus on you because he was right about one thing.

You should treat yourself; you deserve it.

“Get your sorry ass up.”

Yoongi stares at his hand as he walks away from the battered man lying on the ground. His knuckles are bruised and covered in the thief’s blood. The sight would bring shame to his father. He shouldn’t be out here behaving like a street thug when he’s got power moves to make.

But when he found out there was danger lurking so close to you, he had to deliver the message himself. He’s sure it was heard loud and clear.

Possibilities played through his mind with every blow that rained down on the guy. What if it was your father’s restaurant that had been hit up? What if you had been inside?

He’s furious, enraged; but mostly at himself for how he keeps letting you down. You wanted to forgive him tonight, put everything that happened behind you and maybe try again. But what did he do?

He ruined it.

He always figured that he would, but it’s what you needed to hear. He’s not a good guy or some bad boy you can turn good. Yoongi’s in this too deep to be pulled out. There’s no way he could ever look your father in the eye and tell him that he’s put your life in danger. 

That’s why he refuses to address those feelings he has for you. He’d either end up breaking your heart, or getting you into a nasty situation.

If the wrong person were to know that he has a thing for you, you’d become a weapon for an opp to use against him. Yoongi’s respected by many, but there are some who want everything he has; you’d be added to the top of that list if they knew he’d died for you. 

He can’t lose what his family’s worked hard for, but he can’t lose you either. 

There’s only two options if that line’s ever crossed. Either you’re with him, and you’ll have to step into his world; or you’re not; and the streets deem you fair game. 

The latter infuriates him. He’d kill anyone who would ever think of laying a finger on you. That’s why he has to make examples out of motherfuckers like the one behind him.

“You need to find you something safe to do, my friend.”

Yoongi turns around just as the man rises to his feet, staggering and weak from the beating he’s received. One of his arms cradles his torso while the other wipes blood from his lips. He’d receive pity from anyone without the context, but if they knew what he did to that seamstress—they’d be wondering why he’s still alive.

This is far less than what this scum deserves. His apologies fall on deaf ears. Yoongi’s men don’t give a shit about his apology, and neither does he.

“I’m so sorry. I…I didn’t know this was your block too. I was just—”

Yoongi pulls out his glock and fires a shot near the guy’s foot, barely missing him. He doesn’t recall asking him to speak.

“You better assume every block is mine, motherfucker. I own this fucking city. Have you forgotten?”

“I—”

Another shot nearly blows his head off because once again, Yoongi never asked him to talk.

“Who told you to open your mouth?...” he seethes. “Speak again and I won’t miss.”

The man nods, lifting his shaky hands as a surrender. 

Yoongi’s jaw clenches as he contemplates his next move. A few minutes ago, he was set on ending him right in this spot, but after thinking about you he’s calmed down a lot. 

That’s the only reason this man’s life will be spared. His mind is somewhere else now; all he can think about is his own mistakes. This guy’s learned his lesson; no need to waste anymore of his time here.

“Look, don’t ever put me in this situation again. Am I clear?”

“Yes, Sir. I won’t. I promise.”

Yoongi knocks the guy out cold with his gun. He looks over at the officer who was escorting the guy to jail and gives him a nod, giving him the clear to take him in. 

“This was a citizen’s arrest,” he insists, handing the cop a wad of cash.

“You got that.”

He dismisses his men, and goes to have a cigarette while he thinks.

After the criminal is placed in the back of the squad car, the cop rejoins Yoongi as he sits on the hood of his vehicle, having a smoke before he goes on with his night.

“Never thought I’d see you get dirty, especially tonight.”

Yoongi scoffs. “Yeah, me either.”

Yoongi looks at his personal phone, looking to see if you’ve texted him, or called. He doesn’t know why he’s checking. He shouldn’t expect you to reach out after how he left you tonight. It’d be a miracle if you ever wanted to see him again.

“It’s not too late, you know.”

“The fuck are you talking about, Shark?”

Shark is one of his longtime friends. He comes from a long line of crooked cops. 

He’s been present through the ups and downs of his friendship with you. Shark’s always been rooting on your side, always telling him to reach out when you left for college.

Yoongi has never taken his advice, though.

“I’m just saying. Maybe you should just call her,” he explains.

“Who?”

“You want me to say her name out here?”

Yoongi shakes his head. “Absolutely not.”

Both of them share a laugh at Yoongi’s reaction, but then silence falls over the night. 

Now that the adrenaline is wearing off, Yoongi’s hands are beginning to throb with pain. He tries focusing on something other than that awful feeling, but he can only think about you.

Why couldn’t he just hear you out? That would have been fair. He’s regretting more and more as time goes by, wondering if the opportunity has slipped away.

He notices the way you look at him, the way you perk up when you see him. He knows there are a lot of unspoken words because honestly, he’s always had deeper feelings for you. It was way before you realized you like him as well. He bottled that shit up throughout high school, and when he had the chance to tell you how he felt, he fumbled.

You even gave him a second chance to come clean, and he still couldn’t get it together.

“Seriously, what happened tonight? I see it all over your face.”

Yoongi sighs. “I took her home, and she invited me inside.”

“And you said no? Dude, no way.”

Yoongi looks over and finds his friend’s face stuck in a grimace. He feels shame creeping up his neck, so he quickly shifts his focus somewhere else. 

“What was I supposed to say? You know I can’t let anyone see me walking in her place,” he argues.

“You could have invited her to yours, explained things a bit more. I’m sure she’s capable of making decisions for herself.”

Yoongi’s at a crossroads, but every way he turns leaves him with doubt. It’s like he’s damn regardless. 

“What if it doesn’t change her mind? What should I tell her dad, huh?” Yoongi rants. “He asked me to keep her safe, man.”

“And what do you think he meant by that?”

Shark looks at his watch and turns to Yoongi as he prepares to leave. 

“Look, my shift ends soon, so I gotta go. But I think you know as well as I do that you have the old man’s blessings. Just stop overthinking it. You’ll screw yourself.”

With that, Shark walks to his vehicle, and puts it in drive.Before he pulls from underneath the overpass, he rolls his window down and yells out.

“It’ll be alright, brother. Trust me!”

When Shark leaves, he switches cars with his right hand, not wanting to double back to your part of town in the same ride. As he starts driving away from the secluded area, he thinks back on how tonight has gone so far. That’s when something you said hits him…and it hits him hard.

“You said you needed me,” he whispers.

All day you’ve been surrounded by people, loving each other; only to go home to an empty house. You just wanted some company, a distraction. You wanted a friend.

It’s then he realizes that he’s hurt your feelings more than a little. You weren’t hung up on a crush you had over five years ago. He’s so stupid. How did his brain not perceive what you said as an invitation to hang out?

Just like you used to.

Yoongi does a U-turn and heads straight for your house. He has no idea what you’ll say to him, or if you’ll speak to him at all. But he needs you to know one thing; he gets it now. And he won’t ever let you down again.

No matter how many times you watch it, the horror classic Thirteen Ghosts never gets old. Your dad laughs whenever you call it your comfort flick, but he’s also not a horror fan so he just wouldn’t understand. 

That bath worked more magic than you could ever imagine. It’s super late, and you should be in bed, but you’ve been thinking about the bottle of wine you bought the other day since earlier.

You aren’t really a drinker, but the bottle was cute. You figured tonight would be the perfect chance to eat some snacks, watch a movie, and give it a try. But as soon as the glass touches your lips, your doorbell rings. 

You’re not expecting anyone this late. When you don’t answer, they pound on the door, startling you. Wine spills all over your hands. Quickly, you use your shirt to dry them off before making a bigger mess. You drink what’s left in the glass in one gulp before checking your Ring camera, letting out a gasp when you discover who’s standing at your doorstep.

“Yoongi?” you whisper.

Placing your phone and empty glass on the coffee table, you go to see what he wants. If you’re honest, you’re a bit worried. Did someone break into the restaurant? 

Your dad would be devastated. 

Without a second thought, you open the door, and interrogate Yoongi before he can even open his mouth.

“Is everything okay? Did something happen to my dad’s—”

“Oh, fuck. No! No, that’s not why I’m here,” he interrupts. 

You breathe a sigh of relief, clutching your chest as the panic slowly leaves your body. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.”

“No, it’s okay. What’s up? Are you okay?”

Now that you’re not shaken with worry, you notice how disheveled he looks. His hair is messy; his expression seems anxious, his knuckles bruised.

“Were you fighting?” you quiz.

“Huh?” Yoongi looks confused but then suddenly seems to remember his injury. “Oh, this is nothing. I’m good. I just came to uhh… To see you.”

Your eyebrow raises curiously. “To see me?”

“Yeah,” he confirms. 

“Okay, well… that’s nice of you, but I was planning on going to bed in a bit. I have to get up early.”

You aren’t sure why he’s acting weird. Is he in trouble? Surely, he’d tell you if he was. If so, why would he come here?

“Um, okay. Sorry,” he answers.

You tell him goodnight and attempt to shut the door, but Yoongi lodges his arm into the opening.

“What are you doing—”

“I’m listening.”

“What?”

You open the door once again, fully believing this man has lost his mind. It’s freezing out there, and he’s just standing there babbling.

“I said I’m listening,” he repeats. “Tell me.”

“Tell you what, Yoongi?”

You’ve never been more confused. First, he drops you off and hauls ass across town. Now he’s pacing at your doorstep, fumbling all over his words. Something’s going on.

“You wanted to talk, but I ghosted you, remember?”

Oh. So he remembers that.

“That’s water under the bridge. Just forget it,” you insist.

“So now I’m water under the bridge?”

“What?! No! That’s not what I said.”

“Well, explain,” he pleads. “Or just tell me it’s too late.”

“Yoongi…”

“I just wanna be friends again, but this haunts me. If you have feelings for me, I can’t—”

“I don’t,” you admit.

This is the first time Yoongi has stood completely still since he got here. He stares at you with wide eyes, not uttering a single word. 

It took you a long time to understand your feelings for Yoongi. You had to experience a few unnecessary hook ups and break ups to realize you weren’t in love. You just wanted to fuck him like everyone else.

Who knows where things would have gone? But it would have been nice to let things happen naturally than to bottle up feelings.

You open the door again, and step to the side. 

“Come in. It’s cold.”

This time he doesn’t reject your invitation. 

Yoongi follows you into your living room, looking around and probably reminiscing over the past. Nothing’s really changed other than the furniture. However, the memories of the days you two used to run around while your mom scolded you for messing up the floors are still present.

You point to the couch and offer him a seat while you stand there gathering your words.

“You can sit here.”

“Thanks,” he replies.

Yoongi sits and does that thing he does with his hands when he’s nervous. His fingers intertwine and he just watches his thumbs chase each other in a loop. He used to do it all the time whenever he’d stay too late at your house and his dad would come looking for him.

Your parents always were able to calm Mr. Min down before he could reprimand Yoongi. It took him a while but he finally understood that you and his son were best friends, and your place was Yoongi’s second home.

There are so many evenings he’d miss basketball practice to hold you while you cried after your mom died. Yoongi never left your side. Even when you were unrightfully resentful and angry with him for still having his mom in his life; he understood every stage of your grief.

So no, he’s not just water under the bridge to you. He could never be. He may be wrong for shutting you out, but everyone has their breaking point. 

“I wanted to tell you that I was in love with you. That I wanted you to go with me to college,” you confess.

Yoongi’s jaw nearly hits the floor. You can tell he’s shocked because he starts tripping over his words.

“I-I… I didn’t know that. I’m sorry. You—”

“...Was confused,” you add. 

You can’t help but laugh at yourself and at the situation. All this time you’ve been scared to rip the bandaid off, and the wound’s already healed.

“I didn’t have anyone to talk with about dating and stuff; not from a young woman’s perspective, at least. I would watch rom-coms and thought I had butterflies whenever I saw you. Whole time…”

You fold your arms and lean against the wall, watching the television with a blank stare. Already, it feels like a weight is being lifted off your shoulders. So much tension has built up over time, so many unspoken words and unresolved feelings that it’s a relief to get it all out.

“...My pussy was throbbing.”

Yoongi picks his mouth up off the floor, and straightens in his seat. Once again, he’s caught off guard.

“Huh-What?”

You snort. “I was horny, curious… I just wanted you to bend me over and deflower me.”

“Deflower you? The fuck?”

Yoongi’s laughter erupts from his chest, lightening the vibes in the room. It’s nice to hear him laugh, like genuinely grin and reveal his cute smile. You didn’t realize how much you missed seeing the image until it’s presented to you at that moment.

“Well, it’s true!”

“I see you are still an over-sharer,” Yoongi chuckles.

“And you’re still stubborn.”

Both of you look at each, shaking your heads and sharing a fond smile. You can tell this has been weighing on him as much as it did you. He’s regretful of how he handled the situation, and you’re sorry for staying away so long.

You should have tried harder. Yoongi always did whenever it got tough. 

Regardless, it’s in the past. It’s time to move on.

You walk across the room with your arms open, inviting your friend into an embrace.

“Seriously? No way,” he grimaces, trying to get up before you can close him in.

Unfortunately, he’s not fast enough.

“You know you want to. Come here.”

Wrapping your arms around Yoongi, you giggle when he acts like he’s all tense. He always pretends he doesn’t want to hug you at first, but then, he gives in.

“Fuck it,” he groans, pulling you closer.

You melt in his arm almost immediately. You don’t even care if you slide to the floor. All of your weight rests on him, but he still holds you up while complaining about you smothering him.

“I wish I could breathe,” he gripes.

“Fine…”

Yoongi expects you to back away; but instead, you climb on his lap.

“What are you doing?” 

You shrug. “My bad. I thought we were cool.”

Maybe you did move a little too quickly, but it’s nothing you haven’t done hundreds of times. You’ve shared beds, seen each other naked… accidentally found each other’s Pornhub accounts. You were just acting on instinct. 

You’re about to stand, but Yoongi stops you. “We are, but aren’t you mad at me?... From earlier?”

“A little, but…”

“But what?”

“Can’t friends kiss and make up?” you propose.

His hands rest on your bare thighs, fingers gently nudging at your big t-shirt. The room seems warmer now that there’s no distance between you. Or maybe it’s just the fires building in your belly that’s making you hot?

“Maybe…”

You trace his lips with your finger tips while looking in his eyes. You could spend the night like this if it were up to you. He’s beautiful; inside and out.

“Wanna try and find out?” he whispers.

You respond by softly connecting your lips, moaning instantly as your entire body begins to tingle. 

Yoongi pulls you closer, holds you tighter, and encourages you to deepen the kiss you share by parting your lips with his tongue. You don’t deny him, and he invades your mouth—taking over and leaving you dizzy from the lack of oxygen.

Suddenly, he pulls away, and you’re quick to whine.

“I smell wine,” he comments. “Are you—”

“I had a sip, and the rest spilled all over my hands.”

You show him the stains on your hands and shirt, and he just stares in disbelief. “Only you.”

“Whatever,” you dismiss, trying to steal another kiss from his wet lips. “I need you.”

You drag your crotch across his lap, seeking friction. You’re shocked when he grabs your waist, thinking you’re overstepped once again.

“Hold on.”

Yoongi reaches under his shirt and grabs his gun from his waistband. He shoves it in the folds of your couch, and throws you a wink.

“We’ve kissed. Now let's make up.”

With a smile, you get up and grab his hand.

“Follow me…”

“Get on the bed,” he moans against your lips, pulling away to take off his shirt. 

You begin to move, but a thought pops up in your mind. 

Instead of climbing on the bed, you watch him remove his t-shirt and reveal his ink covered body. You bite your lip in awe at the masterpiece standing in front of you. He has no idea how hot he looks while simply undressing. You’re ready to pounce on him right now, but you pace yourself.

You have all night.

When Yoongi notices you’re still standing in the same spot, he tilts his head with a puzzled expression.

“Change your mind?” he quizzes.

You shake your head, and close the small space between you. Before he can say anything else, you drop to your knees. With skilled hands, you pull on his belt until it's free from the buckle. You flash Yoongi a smirk when you discover he’s watching you with those dark eyes. 

As you pop open the button on his pants, your other hand flattens over his denim covered dick, noting the way it begs to be freed.

“I can’t wait,” you murmur, stroking it over his jeans. 

Once you’re finally able to access his underwear, you reach inside and retrieve his thick, warm cock. You don’t care if you moaned before your lips even touched it. Shame is long gone, and you aren’t afraid to show Yoongi how long you’ve been waiting for this.

“I can tell,” he scoffs.

You let his smart remarks slide for the sake of your impatience, and move in to run the tip of your tongue up and down his slit. His precum oozes out and coats your taste buds, giving you a tiny sample of what he’ll taste like when he dumps his load on your tongue. 

Yoongi hisses, probably reacting to sensitivity. You keep going, giving him a moment to ground himself before you give him the real deal.

While you tease him, you admire his girth. He’s heavy in your hand, but his dick is the perfect size to wrap your hand around it. It’s smooth, but textured and veiny—just like his hands.

No longer able to wait any longer, you part your lips and let your saliva cover the tip. You use your fingers and palm to lubricate the rest of his shaft so that it slides into your mouth with ease. Only when he’s dripping wet with spit do you take him in, and his reaction is golden.

“Ahh, fuck.”

If you could smile, you would right now. Knowing you have him on his tiptoes almost feels as good as the blunt head of his dick touching the back of your throat. 

You can feel his muscles tenses up once your head begins to bob up and down, purposefully slurping loudly to create sinful noises.

“Fuck,” Yoongi curses. 

His voice is rough as he pants through his words, attempting to keep his composure, but failing. 

When Yoongi’s hand finds the back of your head, you look up to see what he’s doing. You keep going as you watch him whisper profanities into the air, running his ringed fingers through his dark strands.

He gathers your hair in his palm, making your scalp tingle and sting due to his strong grip. He starts controlling your movements, managing how much of him you take in at once. It’s not long before you’re choking and gagging on his cock. 

Drops of your spit and tears fall to the floor. Your head starts to spin from the vigorous motions, but the feeling doesn’t prevent you from allowing Yoongi to fuck your throat until it’s raw. 

Craving more, he thrusts into your mouth. The look on his face and the desperation of his movements lets you know he’s almost near his peak. However, once he realizes what’s happening, he swiftly pulls out, leaving you coughing due to the sudden intake of air.

“Look at me,” he commands after you catch your breath. “You’re fucking hot for that.”

“Thank you—”

Yoongi’s hand smacks the smirk off your face. You’re caught off guard, but that doesn’t stop your pussy from gushing at the change in his tone.

“But is that what I told you to do?”

You try to shake your head, but he’s still holding your hair.

“No, use your fucking mouth.”

When you try to speak, he shoves his fingers in your mouth, pushing them deep enough to gag you.

“You like using your mouth, don’t you?” he asks, but you know he isn’t looking for an answer. “So speak.”

“I do,” you croak around his digits.

“Now get the fuck on the bed like I told you to the first time.”

Yoongi snatches you up, and you scramble to the bed. You sit and wait for him to take off the rest of his clothes, trying to remain patient as you see he’s not in the mood for disobedience. You weren’t bothered the slightest by his lack of respect.

In fact, you crave more; and if you have to beg for it, you will.

“Second thoughts?” he asks randomly.

You notice that his wallet’s in his hand and after a few seconds he pulls out a condom. You get butterflies the moment he places a knee on the bed. For you, it’s not even happening fast enough.

“No way.”

“Good,” he winks. “Because I’m not gentle.”

“And I’m not glass.”

Yoongi growls when he hears that response, crawling over to you at lightning speed.

“Come here.”

He grabs your thigh and pulls you closer, pushing your legs apart so he can access your center. His fingers trace over your lace panties until he ultimately decides to rip them off of you. 

You squeak in surprise when you hear the fabric tearing.

“Yoongi!”

“Shh,” he coos. “They’re ruined anyway.”

With a face burning with embarrassment, you turn away and stare at the wall while Yoongi puts the condom on. You can feel his eyes on you, observing the way he makes you fidget and squirm.

You get too comfortable lying there in your own thoughts. The sensation between your thighs catches you off guard. 

“Ooh, shit Yoongi!”

Your body reacts the instant his dick rubs against your clit. You’re already worked up and ready to be filled, but Yoongi doesn’t want to skip the foreplay.

“Damn, it’s wet.”

He rubs the tip over your crevice, taunting you each time he passes your entrance. Just when you think he’ll slide in, he moves up to your throbbing clit and repeats.

“Please stop teasing,” you beg.

Yoongi laughs. “Why should I?”

“Because—”

You begin to whine and complain, but your words get stuck in your throat when Yoongi suddenly enters your pussy.

“Oh my god.”

Your wetness allows him to slide in easily, but your body wasn’t prepared to take him all at once. 

You grip your sheets for support, but the initial shock of him moving so quickly takes almost a minute to subside. 

Yoongi’s patient, giving your body time to adjust before he worries about pleasure. His thumb slowly massages your clit, getting you to relax under his touch. When your grip on the sheets finally loosen, he makes tiny strokes to test the waters.

“Good now?” he asks.

“Mhm.”

With your approval, he positions himself over you and fucks you a little deeper. Once he finds the perfect rhythm, he moves your right leg and places it on his shoulder. 

You’re already moaning loudly, not caring who hears. You cry out everytime his dick digs into your cervix, exploring places you never knew could be reached. 

You’ve begged guys to go deep, but they’ve always been scared to test their limits. Not Yoongi; he’s giving you everything he has, and even though you’re barely holding onto your sanity, you’d probably cry if he stopped.

“Take that damn shirt off,” he growls, gripping the giant t-shirt draped over your body.

You almost can’t figure out how to get it off, but by a miracle you manage. Now completely naked, you toss the clothing aside and start groping your tits while you lift your hips to meet his thrusts. You thought Yoongi would enjoy watching you, but he’s not impressed.

“Who told you to touch yourself?” he presses.

You don’t answer quickly enough for him. Honestly, you weren’t going to reply because your mind is so far away that his words just drift through your ears.

A hand around your throat snatches you back to real time. He’s pissed, biting his lip and trying not to spill his load before he’s ready.

“Answer me.”

This time you speak up immediately. “No one.”

“Hm. So you just do what you want?”

The sound of his deep voice mixed with the sound of your slapping skin and squelching juices turns you on beyond explanation. That familiar tension starts to build in the pit of your stomach, informing you of what’s soon to follow.

“I don’t like rules, Yoongi.”

“Oh, you will,” he promises.

Yoongi’s thrusts get stronger, making your body shift towards the top of the bed. He somehow keeps you in place using the hand he has wrapped around your neck, but you’re still being bounced around like a ragdoll.

“Since you don’t like it, I’ll finish up and leave.”  His movements suddenly become faster, and it doesn’t take you long to figure out what he’s implying. “You can make yourself cum, right?”

“What?” you shriek. “No!”

His laughter resonates through your bedroom as he mocks your desperation. You try reaching between your legs, attempting to induce an orgasm yourself but he forbids.

“Uh-uh.” 

He pushes your hand away and pins your wrist to the mattress, leaving you with no other resort.

“Yoongi, I wanna cum. Don’t be an asshole.”

“Better watch what comes out of your mouth then.”

You groan, realizing he’s too stubborn to give in. He’s not bluffing; he’d actually leave you stuck. 

You can taste the pleasure on your tongue. You’re so close, but Yoongi’s thrusts are starting to become wild. If you don’t give him what he wants, you won’t get what you crave.

“Tell me now…” he grunts, lust oozing from his lips. He leans forward, pushing your leg to your chest as he tries to come closer. The coolness of his chains pressed against your feverish skin brings you a little relief, but it’s not nearly enough. “You sorry?”

Fuck.

“I am.”

He chuckles. “I know.”

Yoongi’s thumb then wipes the single tear rolling down your cheek. Your body’s restless and seeking some relief from all the tension building inside your core. 

He finally slows down, pacing himself so he’s no longer ahead of you in the race to ecstasy. His finger gently tugs at your bottom lip, silently asking you to relax your jaw.

“You’re mine, right?”

You nod. “Yeah.”

“Good... Now open.”

Gauging your reaction, he smirks when you don’t oblige. You stick out your tongue, waiting for what you already expected.

Yoongi spits directly into your mouth, and you don’t even flinch. You look into his eyes as you close and swallow. He’s pleased when you reveal that nothing’s left when you open again.

“Good girl. Good fucking girl,” he moans, repositoning himself.

Whatever he says after that is lost between his swearing and muffled cries as he presses his lips against your leg. He slowly picks up his speed this time, allowing the heat to fill up inside of you before he drills you like before.

“Fuck, you feel so good.”

“You too, Yoongi.”

You’re desperate for more tension, but you’re afraid you’ll be punished if you chase it yourself.

“More, please.”

“More?”

“Please…”

“I got you,” he assures.

Without another word, his thumb finds your clit. His name rolls off your lips over and over, surely traveling far outside your bedroom. Your body tenses aside from your fist pounding the bed. 

“Cumming!”

You can hardly breathe, air getting trapped in your lungs as his hips snap violently into yours. Your back arches as a wave of pleasure hits you like a ton of bricks. Your cries begin to fade away and all you can hear is your rapid heartbeat erupting through your ears.

Yoongi doesn’t let up, giving you his all until your body slowly falls back on you. He then pulls out and peels the condom off of his pulsing cock. As soon as it’s freed, he releases his hot seed onto your skin—painting your stomach and breasts white and sticky.

Both of you stay where you are, panting and struggling to catch your breaths.

You can see Yoongi through your heavy eyelids, slumped over and exhausted from everything he’s given in the past few minutes. His hair hangs over his eyes, but you know he’s just staring at your pussy, replaying everything that just happened in his mind.

“Yoongi?”

“Hm?” He snaps out of it at the sound of your voice, gently lowering your leg before he crawls toward you.

You feel like you’re melting when he kisses your lips. It's almost like a dream being this close to him again. Even after so long you remember the way he smells, the way he breathes… You remember everything like it was yesterday.

“You’re so perfect,” he whispers against your skin.  lips make one final journey over your body, kissing every inch of you and not caring about the taste of his cum staining your flesh. He gives you endless compliments and praises, making you bury your face in your pillows. “I can’t forget to taste you.”

“Wait!” you gasp when he spreads your pussy and devours you.

Your sensitive clit throbs in his mouth as he slurps up all your juices. Your body is limp by the time he’s done, eyes nearly shut and your mind shut down for the rest of the night.

“Goodnight, sweetheart,” he mumbles into the darkness.

Whatever he says next is a mystery because your tiredness ultimately puts you into a deep slumber.

“I’m so fucking stupid.”

You groan as the sun pierces your eyes. Throughout the craziness of last night, you forgot to bring your phone to bed with you. Now, you’ll have to walk and—

Or you can ask Yoongi.

With that in mind, you roll over and unfortunately find an empty bed.

Of course, he left last night. He was probably out of the door as soon as you shut your eyes. You can only hope it’s because he has work to do and he’s not avoiding you after everything you talked about. You won’t even let your mind go there.

Instead, you get out of bed and stumble to the living room—finding your phone on the coffee table right where you left it. You’re still getting notifications as you pick it up; most from Kaci, one from another employee, but nothing from Yoongi.

Before you make your daily morning phone call to your dad, you text back that server regarding time off, and see what Kaci’s fussing about.

6:58am Kaci: BITCH YOU’RE STILL AT HOME!? 

7:10am Kaci: you so got fucked last night. i want all the detail STAT heaux

You roll your eyes. She won’t be getting anything other than the usual shoulder shrug. Last thing you need is for her to make a scene every time Yoongi’s in the room. 

7:23am You: omw. please cover for me.

7:23am Kaci: already am. get some ‘good morning’ dick sis

“I swear I wanna kill this girl sometimes,” you sigh.

Before you can leave the messaging app, your phone rings. The number isn’t saved so you answer it with caution.

“Hello?”

It’s Yoongi.

“Hey, what’s up?”

You hope he doesn’t hear the puff of air you let out as relief washes over you. You were sure you’d lost him again after the things you did and said to each other during the heat of the moment. Not like you didn’t mean everything you said, but you aren’t sure if he did.

“Nothing, just late for work. What’s up with you?”

“Not much right now. I might go home and catch some sleep,” he replies. “Your car’s outside, by the way.���

“Really?” You walk over to the window and open the blind, shocked when you see your car parked in front of your house. “How did you…”

“I told them I was taking it as collateral.”

“What?!”

Yoongi laughs. “I’m kidding.”

If he was standing next to you, you’d punch him. You don’t know how you fall for it every single time.

“I have my ways. Just um… do me a favor?” he asks.

“Yeah, anything.”

“I think my phone’s somewhere in your house. Can you check later?” 

You look around to see if maybe you can spot it but it’s nowhere in plain view. 

“I know you’re already late so…”

“Oh, yeah. For sure,” you respond. “If you want, you can stop by and look. The spare key is in the same spot it’s always been.”

“It’s cool. I’ll wait until you’re off work.”

“That works.”

Both of you stay silent, waiting on the other to speak. You realize you should be getting ready for work so you decide to end the call.

“Well, I have to get ready so… I’ll text this number later?”

Yoongi clears his throat before he answers. “Yeah, it’s a burner but I’ll get the message.”

“Kay. Bye then.”

“Hey,” he calls out before you can hang up.

“Yeah?”

“Still mine?”

A smile grows on your face, and you don’t try to stop it. You didn’t want to bring it up, but you were definitely still thinking about last night, wondering what it would mean today.

But you can’t let him have what he wants so easily, can you?

“Maybe,” you tease.

There’s a pause, but when Yoongi does speak his tone grows dark.

“You still haven’t learned, have you?”

You smirk. “I suppose I haven’t.”

“Well, then. I guess I’m coming over later.”

Shit.

If you didn’t think the restaurant would burn to the ground without your presence, you’d tell him to get his ass over here now. The mere thought of a repeat of last night has you clenching your thighs together.

No working late tonight. You’re sure it’ll be slow anyway.

“I guess you are.”

“I’m not being nice this time either,” he warns.

You bite your lip, trying to conceal your excitement, but you’re really bursting at the seams. You’re sure you’ll be anticipating his visit all day, letting your mind flood with scenarios. You decide to go ahead and taunt him some more, adding fuel to the already roaring fire.

“Good. Neither am I.”

He begins to speak but you end the call before he can get it out. 

As you stand in your living room giggling, a wave of nostalgia hits you. You remember he’d do the same to you after you’d complain about something silly. You’d be pissed, so the thought of him tasting his own medicine puts you in the lead on your imaginary scoreboard.

You’ve probably done a lot more that got on his nerves in the past, but who’s counting? It’s your job to push each other’s buttons and make up.

Isn’t that what friends are for?

hope everyone enjoyed !!! let me know what you think !

#yoongi x reader #yoongi fanfic #yoongi smut #bts x reader #bts fanfic #bts smut #bts fics #yoongi fics #yoongi imagines #bts imagines #min yoongi smut #min yoongi fanfic #aaagustd.fics

[snowsonlylove]

hii!! i commented about making a fic of coryo w or about the song haunted by beyonce, i was thinking maybe something smut if ur comfortable! if not its okay but the fic could be academy!coriolanus x academy!reader and theyre school rivals both working hard to beat each other and theyre obsessed with each other but they hide it with the fact they wanna win but they j wanna fuck (or get together) maybe theyre both possessive and jealous or coryo is the one thats really extra with it,, the story could go rlly slow too and then theres just a part where the facade and tension goes away and theyre needing each other so badly at that moment rushing everything, just like how the song goes idk if i made any sense :o im so excited to see the result!! this song just gives me coriolanus vibes

You Must Be Haunting Me..

a/n note: hii!! yes, i loved your idea and i mostly stayed with your vision, only changing some minor things so the situation makes sense and dw i managed to deliver 🫡 hopefully you like it!! tysm for your idea and i look forward to seeing if there are some things you want to expand on (maybe with little blurbs on this dynamic bc i absolutely LOVE this trope!) & i'm totally comfortable with smut so dw about sending me kinky asks or requests. i totally accept them!!

Pairing: Academy!Coriolanus Snow x AcademyRival!Reader

Summary: Y/N Y/L/N and Coriolanus Snow have been academic rivals ever since the beginning of their journey in the Academy. It’s no secret that both Y/N and Coriolanus are the two top students of the Academy, both of them only being able to beat each other, the rest are just no competition for them. However, they genuinely have no idea why they're doing this constant battle against each other. Little did they know, both of them always think about each other behind closed doors and are obsessed with each other, each equally impressed at the other at how intelligent they are. One day, things just boil over with how Coriolanus constantly riles Y/N up and they explode in a huge fight which results in a turmoil of deep, rough and passionate sex. 

Fic Type: Smut (NSFW) 18+, Enemies to Lovers trope, dramatic behaviour from both of them, a wee bit of angst (mostly derived from the name-calling but in my head this is more funny than it is angsty 😭😭😭)

Warnings: unprotected sex (don’t do this guys, use a condom. reader is on birth control), rough pushing, harsh words used from both Y/N and Coriolanus, degradation (use of whore), cunnilingus (female receiving), squirting, lmk if i missed anything else

Word Count: 2k

I do not own Coriolanus Snow or Y/N Y/L/N (cuz it’s you, boo). All credits go to Suzanne Collins and her team. Song credits also go to Beyonce and her team. 

I do not allow my works to be republished or translated under any circumstances. Any instances of this happening and YOU WILL BE BLOCKEDDD. 

Also, ageless and empty blogs will be BLOCKED as this is a 18+ fic. Report my fics and you’re blocked cuz if u don’t like it, LEAVEEEE.

Y/N Y/L/N and Coriolanus Snow began this disastrous journey from the age of 11-12. Both students entered the Academy with an air of poise and elitism about them as they knew what it took to defeat the competition in the Academy, most students not even being a possible candidate to them. It was all fine and well, until one year, Y/N and Coriolanus were put in the same class for the year, and the rivalry then started..

The first assignment of that year was an individual project on what each student thought the Capitol looked like during its earliest times. Each student was tasked with coming up with a drawing with their thoughts on said topic. This was their chance to go up against each other. Both Y/N and Coriolanus would stay up in the library after school and collect piles of books and do their research and by the time the task was due, Y/N and Coriolanus obviously submitted the best sketches.

After acknowledging this, the professor asked the class to vote for who’s sketch was the best. Small pieces of paper were given out to write either Y/N’s and Coriolanus’s names and as the professor then collected the papers, making both students anxious. As the professor counted the votes, Y/N’s heart was beating out of her chest, Coriolanus’s as well. It was then announced that Y/N won, which made Coriolanus furious as he spewed a full speech on how much he hated her. “You’d never be as good as what they say you are. You’re just dirt under my feet. God! You’re such a bitch!” He screamed as the professor and the class started at him in astonishment as they’ve never seen him lash out before.

Y/N was heartbroken when she heard this as sometimes when Coriolanus wasn’t looking, Y/N would sneak glances towards him and she started to be enamoured by him. Their time together after hours in the library would usually end up in them having conversations about their day and this time together helped them bond better. With this in mind, Y/N truly thought Coriolanus was at least civil enough to be respectful towards her. Y/N felt tears well up in her eyes as she ran out of the classroom, the professor telling her to wait.

Coriolanus, still blind with rage, kept on screaming and yelling obscenities about Y/N as he stormed off to his seat, his face red and his whole demeanour fueling with rage. Unfortunately, this fateful day was what started the vicious rivalry between Y/N and Coriolanus as the two would fight over who got the better grades, which teacher favoured which student more, the differences in their scores in each assignment every single day.

As of current, both Y/N and Coriolanus are 18 and in the midst of graduating. One of their last assignments was unfortunately a pair assignment. Dr Gaul once scoped out the Academy and witnessed one of the fights between Y/N and Coriolanus and she noticed how by getting them near each other, she could make them into the power couple of Panem and have them continue the Hunger Games, which inspired her to whisper in the ear of Dean Highbottom to get them to be in the same class and for them to share a table together until they graduated. Both Y/N and Coriolanus were very unhappy about this, both choosing to ignore each other while they were in their seats. 

With both of them getting older, both Y/N and Coriolanus started noticing certain things about them. Coriolanus noticed how Y/N’s facial features were more prominent, how her ass got bigger, her breasts more plump, making him unable to control a certain urge at times which led him to mastrubate thinking about her sometimes. Y/N also noticed a few things about Coriolanus. How he started to grow muscles, how they cling to his academy uniform whenever he took off his academy jacket, how his jaw was sharper, how his nose was becoming more emphasised, how he lost his baby fat. She can honestly go forever and forever about how attractive he is.

That being said, there was one particular day where everything just blew over the water. Y/N and Coriolanus were taking notes during Dean Highbottom’s lecture when Y/N felt Coriolanus’s elbow dig into her arms whenever they got to writing. This obviously made Y/N frustrated as she harshly whispered to Coriolanus to stop a few times, which led to a hushed debate between the two before it grew louder and louder until they were screaming at each other, making the whole class look at them and Dean Highbottom staring at them in shock before yelling for them to stop and stay after class for detention.

Both Y/N and Coriolanus felt embarrassed as they were lectured by Dean Highbottom after class before an assistant of Dean Highbottom requested him to join Dr Gaul for a meeting about the Hunger Games. Dean Highbottom sighed as he looked at the two young teenagers, “Look.. I feel that you two are now old enough to know what is acceptable behaviour in class. I’ll be back soon, do not kill each other while I’m gone.” As Highbottom left the classroom, the tense atmosphere began to build as the door closed behind him.

Almost immediately after he left, Y/N and Coriolanus stared at each other with the most hateful expression ever. Y/N menacingly glared at him while saying with gritted teeth, “See, Coriolanus! If you’re long ass elbow didn’t fucking dig in my arm every single time, that old fart wouldn’t lecture us for one fucking hour! My god, you’re truly dumb!” Coriolanus glared at her before stating, “It’s not my fucking fault that happened with you were taking over the whole goddamn table with your arms everywhere! Geez, Y/N! I thought you’d be more modest!”

Y/N looked at him, shocked, “ME?!! You’re blaming ME for something YOU did! That is so fucking misogynistic coming from you, a man! I swear to god, this is discrimination towards women at its core! Grow the fuck up, Coriolanus! We’re not children anymore! God! I’d be spending my time with Sejanus right now if it weren’t for your stubborn ass!” Y/N huffed while rolling her eyes. Coriolanus stared at her, his face full of jealousy before gritting out, “Sejanus? What the fuck are you doing with Sejanus?! You’re such a fucking whore! Ugh, you’re such a bitch!” Y/N looked at him, offended, “Bitch, weren’t you just fucking Clemensia a few weeks ago? Yeah, I heard about that! Everyone was practically talking about it! Don’t pretend to be so innocent, Coriolanus!”

Coriolanus looked at her, his expression turned dark as he stalked towards her, her taking a step back until her back had hit the wall. Coriolanus leaned towards her, lifting one of his arms to go above her, bringing the other hand towards her chin and lifting it. At this point, the height difference became very apparent as her head was tipped far back, her still glaring at him. “Are you baiting me, Y/N? You talk so much for someone who just fucked Felix Ravinstill of all people a few days ago..” Y/N continued to glare up at him, “At least I had the decency to keep it in my pants longer than you! God, I hate you!” Coriolanus looked taken aback as he muttered while leaning in to cup her cheeks, her face wiggling to be let out of his grip, “Well, I hate you too, sweetheart…” 

Coriolanus leaned in as he captured Y/N’s lips with his, their mouths fighting for dominance as they kissed each other as if they needed each other to breathe. The previous tension broke into a more sensual type of tension as Coriolanus wrapped his hands around her hair ravenously while Y/N’s hand made friends with the back of his neck. One of Coriolanus’s hands found its way to Y/N’s waist as he dragged her away from the wall, pushing her towards a nearby desk before propping her up on the desk and spreading her legs, allowing him to be closer to her, not once breaking their kiss. Y/N broke their kiss as she moved her lips to Coriolanus’s neck and trailed them down his Adam’s apple while taking off his blazer and unbuttoning his shirt, Coriolanus doing the same to her.

As they undressed each other, they continued to slide their tongues against each other, the sound echoing around the classroom. They managed to undress each other down to them both only wearing underwear before Coriolanus kneeled down so that he was face to face with the apex of her thighs. Coriolanus leaned in and captured his teeth to her underwear as he slowly pulled it down, revealing her aching, dripping pussy. Coriolanus licked his lips as he roughly shoved two fingers in her cavern as he curled his fingers in and out her folds, creating a beautiful sensation as he found her G-spot with no difficulty.

Y/N moaned as she threw her head back and slid her hands down to Coriolanus’s hair and tugged on it while pulling him closer to her heat. “Oh my gosh.. Coryo, it feels so good…” As he kept pumping his fingers in and out of her, he suddenly attached his lips onto her clit as he sucked on her clit and pumped his fingers harder, each movement feeling more and more intense for Y/N. He kept on going as he curled his fingers one final time, which made Y/N yell out as she squirted and covered his fingers with her wetness.

Y/N sighed in satisfaction as she helped Coriolanus up and gave him a deep, passionate kiss while tugging down his underwear and hooking her legs on the bottom of his back, Coriolanus leaned in closer as he aligned his erection with her heat, tapping his dick on her clit a few times before pushing his hardness in her heat. He only pushed in half of it when Y/N suddenly exclaimed, “Coryo, it’s too much! I can’t take all of it!” 

Coriolanus leaned down so his forehead was laying against hers before whispering in a comforting tone, “It will fit, Y/N. Trust me, trust me..” He closed his eyes as he leaned in to capture her lips with his as he pushed in slower this time, now being able to fill her pussy with his cock to the point where their hips were against each other. Coriolanus groaned as he slowly pulled out before thrusting in again, “Fuck, Y/N… You’re so good. Such a good girl..” 

Y/N moaned at hearing him praise her as he started to thrust his dick in faster, each time harder and rougher than the last. The room started to echo with the sound of her moaning, his groaning and the sound of skin slapping. Y/N closed her eyes as she moaned, her mouth forming an “O” shape as she threw her head back once more and arched her back, needing to feel closer to him. Coriolanus wrapped his arms around her waist as he pulled her in closer and kissed his way all around her neck, leaving furious red hickeys which would soon turn purple.

The pace in which he was fucking her got rougher each time he would thrust his aching hard dick into her dripping pussy, the slapping sound really turning them on and his balls slapped to her ass, their moans becoming louder and louder each time. The furious force in which he was fucking her started to reach a boiling point as Coriolanus moaned, “Ugh.. I’m fucking cumming, Y/N. Oh.. You’re such a good girl. Such a tight and wet pussy..” 

“Ohh.. Coriolanus… So good, so deep… I’m gonna come, gonna come.. OH MY GODD!!” Y/N screamed as she came. Coriolanus groaned as he came inside her, sighing as he tried to bask in the afterglow of his orgasm, holding Y/N tight against his chest in the process. Y/N left kisses and hickeys around his neck as she looked up at him with a dazed but satisfied expression and kissed his lips however, this time the kiss shared between them wasn’t one full of hate, it was one full of love.

As they pulled away from each other and started to get dressed, Coriolanus faced Y/N and said, “You know, if you wanted to fuck me, you could’ve said so.” He said with a smirk. Y/N turned to look at him, acting shocked as she huffed in feign frustration, “Oh shut up, Coriolanus!” She smacked his chest as both of them gave each other a silly grin before hurling in laughter.

#academy!coriolanus snow #coriolanus snow #tbosas fanfiction #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #hunger games #coriolanus x reader #coriolanus snow x reader #snow x reader #coriolanus snow smut #coriolanus snow angst

[goo-berz]

Talking about Vivziepops' weird art of minors

I've never been the biggest fan of Vivziepop, I've always knew about their weird behavior (since like 2018 ~ 2019) before they were as popular as they are now.

She has done a lot of weird stuff but the thing I mainly wanna focus on in this post is their character Addison. Addison is a 17 year old gay effeminate fox humanoid from Zoophobia, he's in a relationship with a 19 year old Teacher's assistant named Gustav. Many people get confused by this but Addison has been CONFIRMED to be 17 years old by Vivziepop. Someone had changed Addison's Fandom Wiki page back in 2019 to say they're 18, when this is not true, Vivzie has confirmed they're 17. I did go back and change the age to 17 on the Wiki with the correct age in hopes that people stop believing incorrect information.

Vivzie confirming their age: https://twitter.com/vivziepop/status/1128064633166712832

The tags in this post brings up the fact that Addison is nearly 18 - not 18 yet - They're still 17.

Edit: Oh yeah, I want to add on context to this tag: "I should mention the characters canon ages are higher then when I first made them because as I wrote the story any big age gaps were uncomfy"

I've heard multiple older fans of Vivziepop say that Addison was originally meant to be 14-15 years old, and I've heard that Gustav was originally meant to be in his 30s.

Addison was created 2010, She began shipping Gustav with Addison in 2011, and Zoophobia began in 2012. So the fact she shipped a 14-15 year old character with a 30 year old one to begin with, and encouraged her friend to draw intense NSFW art of them together is so.. weird.

Anyways, Vivzie also hints at Addison being a minor, using wording indicating how young they are in age in their Blogpost introducing the character

"I finally created a few concepts, but the one I have been toying with the most is a young character much like Gale. An albino boy, with an identical albino sister"

If you need more proof, Addison is also preyed on by Mirage, a character that SPECIFICALLY goes after minors... that's basically her main personality trait, that she's a p3d0. She goes after Addison because he's a young submissive boy and easy to manipulate.

Anyways, back on topic. I personally I don't see anything wrong with the age gap of 17 & 19, however I do think it's weird to have this relationship between Addison and Gustav.. he's not exactly a teacher, but he still holds power over Addison due to the fact he's the voluntary teacher's assistant. Back when Zoophobia was popular there were people who found this dynamic weird & creepy considering the fact that Addison is basically a student under Gustav. Also, I just wanna bring this up because I find this weird, Gustav was originally under the impression that Addison was a year one student and much younger than he actually is, yet he still tried to flirt with him.. erm..? Yeah..

Anyways, that isn't the main point. The point is that Vivzie DREW NSFW OF HER 17 YEAR OLD CHARACTER AND HIS 19 YEAR OLD TEACHER... erm.. holy cracker balls? Literally how can anyone excuse these?

Vivzie also drew Gore of Addison too, but I won't post it here cus it's very graphic and weird and idk why she drew it!!

And .. possibly the worst drawing of them all.. Holy titties what is this... If you're wondering, the stuff under the censors is ACTUAL NSFW. It's not suggestive, or implied s3x, It's their ACTUAL WEE WEEs.

These accounts are poorly archived, so it's hard to find the original post and what it originally said. However after some digging I was able to find out the original text said

“ dollcreep: “ i can only see ‘dark-Günter’ exposing him and addi to a public area like so…so. yeah. Günter says; merry Christmas. god this question is super old. vivz reminded me about it"

So, I'm assuming that Dollcreep drew this, not Vivzie. However I was also able to find out from the limited resources there is that Vivzie reposted this to her accounts Vivzie-zp (unarchived) and ZPanswers, which are also now deleted, but if you view the accounts tumblr archives over the Wayback machine you can see that she did indeed repost this. http://web.archive.org/web/20120801182958/http://zpanswers.tumblr.com/archive

If you don't know, Dollcreep and Vivzie used to be best friends, however aren't anymore. Dollcreep originally designed Gustav, originally named Gunter, and Vivzie bought the design from them. Vivzie designed Addison back around 2010, and taking into account the old caption, this means that Vivzie.. allowed Dollcreep to draw NSFW art of their underaged character ;-; oh my gawd!!! Whatthe heck guys... like I said at this time Addison was still 14 - 15 and Gustav (Gunter) was in his 30s.

Also I want to mention that this drawing was from 2011, so that means Vivzie had this pedophilic ship with Dollcreeps OC for years, & after she bought the rights to the character she decided to.. keep the pedophilic ship and write it into Zoophobia by making him Addisons teacher. That's crazy..?

Anyways, because I brought up Mirage. Mirage is written pretty bad. She was a character meant to be in.. or scrapped from Zoophobia, she was meant to be a villain who preyed on the kids, mainly Addison. Her main trait is that she likes kids

Vivzie's made a bunch of drawings of Mirage preying on kids which I think is pretty weird, especially considering how poorly some of them represent it and make it seem like a joke instead.

and yeah, we all know about this infamous drawing she made of Mirage preying on Kestrel, a 14 year old. Pretty weird

Also when I looked at the web archive of Vivzie's ZPanswers blog (a Zoophobia ask blog) she accepted many weird asks about Kestrel, 14, and Addison, 17, like an ask asking if Kestrel had ever been fucked by a horse & how Kestrel, Addison & others would act when they were drunk. Which is also pretty weird to me I won't lie

Anyways that's all for now. Sorry if this is all over the place its 4am and I just wanted to get my thoughts out that vivziepop is kinda a weirdo

#vivziepop #hazbin hotel #helluva boss #vivzie #zoophobia

[rauberrauber]

line up baby

wanted to make a sort of ref for everyone so i can keep track of everyone's designs, heights, etc

side hcs below cuz i wanna ramble lol

fyi any links are just for pictures to help visualize what im trying to say

also add to these with ur own i love reading hcs :]

general:

the sides work with a kind of cartoon logic (kinda like who framed Roger rabbit) which is what their shape shifting and such is, they can survive pretty much everything, dont bend to reality type thing

i also dig playing around with the idea that they just arent human, they dont need to eat, sleep, even breathe or blink if they dont wanna. They just play more human around thomas so they dont freak him out (everyone but remus at least, dude doesnt give a fuck lol) they all have their priorities regarding that kinda stuff. like logan doesnt eat or sleep almost at all (there r exceptions tho obvi (crofters))  while patton rly likes to cook and bake so why not eat the stuff you make? meanwhile remus eats literally anything he can find

they can also float if they wanna, same thing where they just dont around thomas. this came about me just imagining remus consistently floating around in the mindscape instead of walking for whatever reason? so yeah they can do that

theres a core mindscape and a ‘dark’ mindscape, that sorta works like the upside down from stranger things (as in the dark mindscape is like literally upside down and mirrors everything, like this)

everyones also got their own unique doors to their rooms. logans is very sleek and modern, pattons in more childlike and almost vintage, romans resemble castle doors while remus’ is more like a dungeons, virgils is typically angsty teenager with tons of posters and ‘keep out’ signs, and janus has tons of locks on his

design wise the core sides have straight teeth and fluffier hair while the dark sides have sharp teeth and rougher(?) hair (since changing, virgil has vampire-esque fangs)

logan:

square rimmed glasses

loves the rain

unintentionally fidgets with his clothes, always adjusting his glasses or rolling his sleeves up and down or messing with the buttons or his tie

playing more into the whole ‘sides dont have to eat thing’ he finds food kinda nasty lol, again only rly eats stuff thats very good to him (ultimate picky eater basically) patton has tried and failed many times to get logan to try and like new foods

roman was the one who got him to try crofters

watches those long ass video essays about random topics on youtube for background noise

patton:

round glasses and heart eyes

has roller blades/skates! specifically these ones that retract the wheels. good way of getting energy out (even if hes super clumsy with them)

tallest + dad bod

tons of bandages, kinda playing around with the phrase ‘broken heart’

him and janus play video games together (both of them are terrible lol)

definitely listens to dad rock/dad music

roman:

starry eyes!

crown can float on its own (same w/ remus’)

has one of these couches in his room to dramatically faint onto

him and remus dont share a room, but they have a sort of portal to each others rooms if that makes sense. a big mirror but instead of reflecting, its showing into the other room and only the twins can go thru

wants to be his own side after the split

roman and remus pierced each others ears when they were younger

virgil:

decently tall but slouches a lot which hides it (slouching hes shorter than the twins but still taller than janus) also rarely stands or sits straight at all so it kinda shocked the core sides when he showed them how tall he rly was (queue roman being mad cuz hes actually the shortest of the main four lol)

has stereotypical emo hair and still has some purple dye in it

hot topic skeleton fingerless gloves and muddy sneakers (idk why it just feels right)

tons of random bruises

draws his nails black with sharpie

listens to metal music to calm down. remus got him into a lot of numetal, screamo kinda music when virgil was still one of the others, it was one of the few times theyd hang out and virgil wasnt 100% freaked out by remus

definitely experimented with scene fashion when thomas was a teenager

drinks tons of energy drinks

janus:

shortest ha

yellow eyes

bow wrapped on his hat

long flowy cape and heeled shoes with spats (thats what theyre called right?)

uses the staff from pof as a walking cane

speaks fluent pig latin, remus and logan are the only ones who can somewhat understand what he says (remus cuz hes been around janus so long, and logan wanting to research and understand whatever the hell janus is saying) it also has always drove virgil up the wall cuz hes never been able to get it, janus will start speaking it just to annoy him

only rly relaxes when by himself, always kinda putting on a mask with the others and thomas, regardless of how trustworthy he considers them

constantly coming up with proper plans and schemes, typically wouldnt let remus near them with a 10 foot pole (affectionately)

knows how to lockpick

scared of the ocean

remus: 

broken crown

eyes can go all crazy, pupils can be different sizes and such (there was a cartoon that did this where the eyes would go red and have a ton of rings around the pupils like spirals kinda? i cant find a pic of what im rly visualizing rip i hope that makes sense)

ton of rings (one of em is an eyeball ring)

is like half an inch taller than roman and will never let him live it down

enjoys all the ‘bad’ disney/pixar movies. (cars, home on the range, etc) and like unironically enjoys them. prolly started ironically to mess with roman but he genuinely find those ones the best and cant fathom why theyre disliked (totally not self-indulgent cuz some of those movies are my favorites)

comes up with random weird plans and ropes janus into them whenever possible, janus plays along best he can

somewhat wants to fuse back with roman (even if hes unsure why)

remus and virge used to make fun of roman together all the time

remus is the one who gave virge his septum and gages

#thomas sanders #sanders sides #logan sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #sanders sides headcanon #ts #tss #logic sanders #morality sanders #creativity sanders #creativitwins #anxiety sanders #deceit sanders #weapon tw #food mention #ask to tag

[kxmikomrade]

🍁˖࿐ Artist! S/O - Isagi, Bachira, Reo, Sae

╰┈➤Hcs of them with an Artistic S/O!! Genre: Fluff and crack Gn!reader or Any gender Warnings: Swearing, Not proof read bcs im lazy, idk wat else but lmk if theres anything else Waiter's Note: OH LOOK WHO FINALLY PULLED THIS OUTTA THEIR DRAFTS AFTER A WHOLE ASS 5 MONTHS LMAOO I HOPE U GUYS ENJOY <33 Reqs Open as usual!! Masterlists

Now Playing: An Art Gallery Could Never Be As Unique As You

Very VERY VERYYYY fascinated on what you do, he thinks it's really cool

He canonly likes art too so let him join in!!

Draw him in any way like even a small doodle and he WILL COMBUST

He decorated his wall infront of his desk with your drawings and doodles, other things like custom keychains, origami, glass paintings are on his desk so he can see it everyday when he wakes up 🥹🥹

Study dates with you two often end up in drawing-cuddling sessions

Starting with studying so you can both pass your exams to you two beside eachother, legs tangled under the kotatsu table while you both lay on your stomachs, drawing whatever you felt like drawing 🫶

Let's just hope that you both pass your exams 😭😭

When you have art block or you feel stressed, he offers to take you out to a walk (yk he loves those esp with you)

It may seem kinda annoying at first but trust me, it does WONDERS

YOUR WORKS ARE DISPLAYED THROUGHOUT THE ISAGI HOUSEHOLD ✨

His parents like your creations too but they ALWAYS remind you whenever you come over that it's okay to take breaks and do other things 🥹💖

He's not rich by all means, but he's willing to spend his money to get you supplies u want

When he got the letter for blue lock, you both agreed to meet at a park at night and you talked things through, promising to work hard and improve while you both are separated

Whenever the topic of art or s/o comes in, he just ends up talking everyones ear off in blue lock and the question was just from a truth or dare game😭

Whether or not you got recognized for your art and got more commissions/promotions or quit art to start something new that interests you, he's supportive just as you are for him 🫶

HE LOVES ART, AND YOUR AN ARTIST?? MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN

Introduces you to his mom <33 you both share tips and tricks and now she's like your teacher ITS SO CUTE

But Meguru gets pretty pouty if you just sit there beside his mom talking about art related things all day 😭

If you let him lay down on your lap and give him occasional kisses then he'll be able to sit still for a while longer

You gave him a bee-themed soccer ball you painted once and he ALWAYS has it on his bed so he can fall asleep hugging it 🥹

He doesn't play with it tho, atleast not outdoors bcs he doesn't wanna ruin it 😭💖

Painting with him and his mom if she isn't busy!!

He always plays around and puts paint on your face, his mom scolds him for it LMAOO

Don't take him to art museums pls 😭😭 HAVE YOU SEEN HOW HE WAS IN THE LIGHT NOVEL?? you both would get in trouble just because he was bored 💀

BRAGS TO EVERYONE AND ANYONE IN BLUE LOCK ABOUT YOU THAT THEY LITERALLY KNOW YOU AND EVERY SINGLE ART PIECE YOU HAVE DONE BEFORE EVEN MEETING YOU OR SEEING THEM 💀💀😭

Has tried to eat paint before 🧍‍♂️Much worse if you paint food then bro might try it again 💀💀💀

You sit on a bench nearby and draw while he practices, it's relaxing, just watch out for the ball 😭💀

Oh boy

Id say for a FACT that you were broke until you started dating him unless you have really cheap materials or you're just really good at saving

Yk how art materials and art school is so ridiculously expensive?? Well, your LOVELY boyfriend here has it all covered

Mans literally already bought a whole art shop 💀

Its not like it's anything new *looks at art big art studio*

PLEASE get a frying pan and smack some sense into this man's head bcs he was just about to buy his way into getting your art showcased in an art gallery/convention

He might, MIGHT stop if you use his own words against him. Like the whole 'i want to carve my own future' thing

Lets be fr, he won't stop, the most he could do is stop bribing his way to get your art showcased

Bby supports you alot tho :((

He just admires how much effort you're able to put in each work

When art block kicks in, he'll take you to go to expensive art galleries or to wherever the Mona Lisa is currently being showcased at

Just drag him out and tell him u wanna learn soccer 😭 it's honestly more fun than roaming around an art gallery

Paint him with his parents and they'll already start planning your marriage 💀😭

Bro when collage comes along, then your tuition fees and apartment bills are already paid like??? I wonder how 🤔

PLS DRAW HIM AND SHOW HIM THAT THERE ARE OTHER WAYS TO EXPRESS LOVE OTHER THAN MONEY SPENDING BCS HE'LL ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND WITH ALL THE TIME, EFFORT AND SKILL YOU PUT IN

He DEFINITELY frames all the drawings/paintings you give him. No buts

Let's be fr, he probably has a room in his house filled with your creations 🧍‍♂️

I'm pretty sure that blue lock allows anything to be brought unless it's a phone or something (because they'll have to earn it back) so Reo brought this photo album/journal decorated by you and/or your drawings

AND YK THOSE MINI PRINTERS??? HE BROUGHT ONE TOO SO WHENEVER YOU SEND A NEW ARTWORK, HE PRINTS IT 😭😭

Talks Nagi's ear off every time 💀

Supportive bank in general 👍 jkjk pls don't use him just for money or I will come for your eyeballs 🤗

Sae is pretty chill compared to his hardcore emo brother like did you see that one panel where he wanted to go home in the middle of a game while applying lotion???

He doesn't seem like the type to check social media often too so I hc that he draws after practices when he gets home to cool down for the night yk

I can definitely see him drawing his favorite characters from Chibi Maruko-chan whenever he feels stressed or has a bad day because of his stupid teammates who play like headless chickens 🙄(his words not mine)

So like when YOU came in, it's like he's surrounded by comfort when you two draw in silence while listening to your shared playlist 🌼

drawing fanarts for him that you wanna show off to everyone since he's beautiful and he's even more beautiful in your artstyle <33

he doesnt know about it tho because thats too embarrassing

rin follows you on that account with his private acc LMAOOOOOO

LISTEN. IMAGINE DRAWING HIM WITH HIS YEE YEE LOOKIN ASS BANGS AND TEASING HIM ABOUT IT HAHAHSHAHA

you secretly sent one to Rin for funsies once and he sent you a pic of Sae when he was young back, now you both have this sketchy deal thing going on that Sae doesnt know SHIT about

dw tho, both your mouths are sealed because now you got Rin to approve of you

If you live with him abroad, then your apartment/house is FILLED with notes/drawings/sketches/paintings/origamis, etc. im not exaggerating at ALL.

Imagine those cute and decorated fridges but make it the ENTIRE house

You both just slap some sticky note on walls, tables, chairs, cabinets, shelves, counters and draw on it,and neither of you clean them up, you just leave it there 😭😭

it comes off when it comes off ig 🤷

If you dont live with him abroad, then you guys have a minecraft server you both share thats literally FILLED with builds. Somehow, Sae's RIDICULOUSLY fast at learning these things and now hes an architect 🧍‍♂️

Also those cooperative drawing websites/games?? yeah, you both have them OFTEN, like, every night other than when hes like SUPER tired

just stick to screenshoting him and drawing on his face

He buys you anything you need/want too and theres basically no stopping him 🤷🤷

Tagging: @inariezaki

[1341 words]

#blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #blue lock x you #blue lock headcanons #bllk isagi #bllk bachira #bllk reo #bllk sae #itoshi sae x reader #sae itoshi x reader #blue lock sae x reader #sae x reader #reo mikage x you #mikage reo x reader #reo mikage x reader #bachira x reader #bachira meguru x reader #meguru bachira x reader #isagi x reader #isagi yoichi x reader #yoichi isagi x reader

[tuliptic]

Guerilla: Break The Wall

Hi I’m back for a short while before I disappear to focus on life. I guess? Idk. But yeah, here’s something that I’ve worked on and I’m happy with how this turned out!

What walls of expectations do I need to break? What unhealthy habits do I need to fight so that I can be my very best self?

Close your eyes, meditate on this topic and ask yourself the question: “What walls do I need to break for me to be a better version of me?” Breathe in and out, make sure your mind and heart is calm. Then, open your eyes to see which pile talks to you the most/draws you in the most. Once you’ve found your pile, scroll down to the respective parts to see what are the messages for you.

Pile 1    -     Pile 2

Pile 3    -     Pile 4

Disclaimer: This is solely for my entertainment purposes. Take only whatever that you feel like it. If it doesn’t resonate, it’s okay to just drop it. That aside, I do not consent to my work or here to be used by third parties on this platform or other websites.

Decks used: Luna Cat Tarot Deck (Major Arcana), Linestrider Tarot Deck, Sweet Dreams Oracle Deck, Starcodes Astro Oracle Deck, self made lyrics deck.

Pile 1

Card of querent: The Emperor

You’re probably someone who has been fighting through life. A definite fighter. You’ve been acting on your passions and dreams, and have been fighting and charging towards your goals. There’s also a sense of pain? A sense of loneliness. You’ve been struggling and fighting towards your goals that you’ve lost sight of the people around you, and you ended up being alone. You’re the emperor, but you also have no one by your side, only your throne with you.

1. What negative/unhelpful expectations do I have towards myself? - The Magician

I see that you have huge expectations of yourself. You kinda wanna be Jack of All Trades, and Master of All. You’ve been wanting to master all aspects of life, like the financial aspect, career satisfaction, relationship happiness, etc. Lemme clarify once again, you do not want to only have satisfaction in these aspects of life, but you want to master them, to excel in them, to gain a certain reputation in it. You’ve been wanting to achieve it and to manifest your dreams, and you wanted more of that something than you need. And this expectation has been wearing you out.

2. How have those expectations been holding me back? - Queen of Cups rx

Wearing you out is one thing, but most of all, it’s been making you lose touch with yourself, lose touch with those around you. You have spent time fighting the outer world, and ignoring your inner world. You have been distancing yourself from your heart, your home. You have not been nurturing yourself, your inner child has been pushed away by you to achieve whatever that you have wanted. You feel as though you’re unable to return to your roots, return to where your heart resides. It’s as though you’ve been squeezed dry.

3. Why should I break those walls of expectations? - Justice rx

To do yourself justice, to return to the balance that needs to be maintained, to have a clearer, healthier way of thinking. Instead of seeing a balance of the mind, I’m seeing more on the balance of action. What you do to yourself, what you do to others, and the consequences as well as the results coming out from them. The scales in this card reminds me of… If I recall correctly, the afterworld in Egyptian mythology, where your actions/heart is weighed against the feather. That. I just went and checked that the feather symbolises truth and justice. You’re called to think more about your actions.

4. How do I break those walls? - Six of Swords

By exploring. You’re called to explore the different thoughts, the different cognitive behaviours. I have a feeling that this is gonna be more psychology-ish, where you explore to understand yourself better. To see what helps you and what doesn’t, and you leave those that don’t help you behind, travel forward with what helps you. The journey of exploration will only begin when you follow your inner passion, where you honour your inner child’s grace. With that, only you’ll learn to set eyes on other things as you move forward.

5. How do I tune into my feelings? - Five of Wands

Understanding and unwinding the cords of conflict may sound difficult but these are necessary. There are a lot of emotions that you need to unbox, to sort them out, to understand them individually. It’s like… Understanding why this thing is a trigger, understanding why you’re having this particular emotion, understanding why things happen, understanding how to deal with things that are out of your control, and all that. There are a lot of noises in your head, and those thoughts are fighting with each other. It’s difficult to deal with it but it’s not impossible. And most of all, it’s necessary. You’ll need to fight this through. It may sound like a long journey, but the time will pass anyway. And who knows, the good things will come to you sooner than you think.

6. What happens when I welcome the world with my new found feelings? - Temperance rx

This is another card that symbolises balance. When you’re able to welcome the world with your new found feelings, you’ll be able to regain the balance that was once lost. You’ll be able to ride along the waves and head to a new direction. It’s like… the clouds obstructing the sun have been moved and you’re able to see it clearly. That’s the same with how you look at your future, the world. The dark clouds are gone and you see your future, your world with a new found light, to still be yourself even when you’ve changed.

Overall energy: Wheel of Fortune, Ten of Cups rx

I’m seeing that this is a change that you’ll need to go through. If you go through it willingly, if you yourself made the decision to change yourself for the better, you’ll be granted the ability to go through them easier as compared to having changes being thrown onto you. There’s an emotional conflict and discomfort that you’re going through right now and in a sense, it’s telling you to make the necessary changes so that you can align yourself better. Connect with your inner child through fun and play, let your inner child guide you through. There’s a huge theme of a brighter future with a new you, so have faith and welcome the new you coming through.

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Pile 2

Card of querent: The Hierophant

For some reason, I’m seeing you as someone who’s private. You are the type who doesn’t share the bright and dark side of your life to people, unless those close to you ask about it. If they don’t ask, you won’t say a thing. I’m seeing two different groups of introverts here: one’s an introvert naturally, where you’ve been quiet and hang out only with a few friends; and the other group is the one that used to be shut down for quite a long time in your life, resulting in you learning to suppress your feelings and emotions (I have a feeling that most of y’all will be in the second group). There’s some sort of heavy energy that has been suppressing you.

1. What negative/unhelpful expectations do I have towards myself? - The Hermit

That you have to be quiet, that you have to burn yourself to warm others, that others are of a higher priority than yourself. Not gonna lie, you’ve been treating yourself harshly and have not been healing yourself. You’ve been used to helping others, and some of you may have people pleasing tendencies, where you help others at the expense of yourself. Some people are appreciative and grateful to what you’ve done for them, while most have been feeding off you. As time went on, the negativity grew on you but you’re afraid of cutting ties. You’re unable to clear your mind and regenerate your spirit anew.

2. How have those expectations been holding me back? - Wheel of Fortune

These unhealthy expectations have been denying the entrance of good things into your life. See, there’s so much potential and good things in life. But it won’t come to you if you keep passing them to other people. Good luck has been wanting to go to you, Fate wanted to change your course for the better. But due to the expectations you have for yourself, you’ve built a wall, a barricade to stop and block them from coming to you. With this going on, you’ve been unable to invite the good things into your life. 

3. Why should I break those walls of expectations? - King of Wands rx

You’ve been through the ups and downs of life, and have adopted a warm, kind and understanding persona. However, there may be a certain anger in you that has been slowly eating you up. Something in you that’s slowly burning up your core beliefs, your inner kindness. If those walls of expectations are not taken down, you’ll be burnt inside your castle. You’ll need to act, find your passion and dreams and break out from the place you’ve built around yourself. I’m feeling two things from this question: feeling like my insides have been scrunched up badly, and extreme emptiness. These would be the outcome if the walls of expectations are not taken down.

4. How do I break those walls? - Ace of Swords

Clarify the necessary expectations you need to let go. Know that you wield the sword to cut down the thorns that have been covering and hurting your heart. You may be injured during the process of struggling, but it’s necessary and doable. Know that you are blessed as each step you take will bring you to the freedom you’ve wanted, know that the abundance in life is coming to you as you leave the place that no longer nurtures you. Once you’ve clarified the necessary, take action. Cut them down swiftly. 

5. How do I tune into my feelings? - Six of Wands

Let yourself be proud of what you hold, what you’ve been through. Take hold of your achievement, let yourself shine through. You’ve been pushing the good things to others. Now it’s time for you to accept them, to acknowledge them. Let yourself be the spotlight occasionally. You really gotta take things into your own hands and feel the satisfaction yourself. Slowly build up your confidence as it is gonna be one of the greatest assets you hold. It’s difficult, coming from someone with an inferiority complex. But it’s achievable. Be kind to yourself and take baby steps to build yourself up into a brighter you.

6. What happens when I welcome the world with my new found feelings? - King of Pentacles rx

You’ll be able to nurture yourself more, slowly letting yourself out to explore the various opportunities and chances. Happiness and success are built from various achievements and you’re slowly getting there, realising that the self has great values. You’ll slowly cultivate a positive yet humble attitude, growing to explore yourself and what you are bound to achieve.

It’s like betting everything to show that there are things that only you can do, and you strive for it. Instead of saying that you can’t do something, you’ve learnt to try it out first. Luck will follow you as you step out into the new paths, finding and meeting the new you in the future.

Overall energy: The Fool, The Hanged Man

I’m seeing that there will be an opportunity for you to get this sort of self revelation, to go on this new journey of self realisation. You have to confront your demons, your fears, your shadow side, and let your heart be opened to love as it manifests into the world. Know that there are people around you who are willing to help you, and your inner child who promised you to walk through this journey together. Your voice may be soft at first, but let yourself grow, let yourself shout out and break the walls around you with your vigour.

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Pile 3

Card of querent: The Sun

Straight off I'm feeling the vibe of an activist. There’s probably a fiery side in you where you tend to focus on the good in life, the good in people. You want to shine, shed warmth to those who are in need of them, want to help people in their weakest time. For some reason I’m thinking of Princess Diana? Like… She helps and yet she shines. She knows the strength and her fame, and she uses them for the well-being of the minorities. Kinda energy. The Sun here isn’t scorching, isn’t blazing. It’s warm, gentle, and comforting. This is what I’m getting from this card.

1. What negative/unhelpful expectations do I have towards myself? - Queen of Pentacles rx

If you identify as a woman, I feel that you may have expected yourself to be a femme fatale kinda character, being the boss bitch, won’t wanna let anyone tie you down. And with that, I’m also feeling that you’ve wanted to be financially free and this manifests in the sense where you’ll be impatient with yourself when you can’t achieve it. I’m also seeing that you’ve been looking for the meaning of life, and I’m also seeing/feeling some unhappiness from this when whatever you find doesn’t seem to align with what you expected. If you don’t identify as a woman, you probably will want to embody the bad bitch energy and may end up pushing people away from you. Suddenly have the thought of like... You’re strong that’s why you can be alone. Kinda mentality. I hope I’m making sense here.

2. How have those expectations been holding me back? - Five of Cups rx

It has blocked you from seeing beyond the walls, from experiencing new things as you quickly shut them down when you don’t like it or when you think it doesn’t align with yourself. There are better things that are waiting for you beyond the wall, but I’m seeing stubbornness here as well. There are many opportunities in life’s challenges, but instead of learning those lessons, you’ve chosen violence in the sense where the anger and grief is redirected at yourself, and sometimes towards the outer world, creating an imbalance in your heart.

3. Why should I break those walls of expectations? - The Moon rx

There’s a lot of messages on alignment that I’m getting from this pile. You’ve been through a lot of traumatising events, a lot of tension ever since you were a child and it had all made you a… Mess (the severity of it differs according to each individual). The path of healing gets much more difficult as you let time pass, so it’s best if you take charge and make the necessary changes now. There are many old, limiting beliefs, and one of them that I’m seeing is that you may feel that you’re not deserving of love. You need to surrender and throw them aside, so that you can be reborned into the limitless possibilities out there. 

4. How do I break those walls? - Seven of Swords

Work smart, not hard. I’m not sure how you can work smart with healing as it takes time, but I’m also seeing something like… Replacing? For example, replacing certain thoughts with another action. There may be times where you’d yell out in frustration and throw things when you’ve reached a certain point. Replace that with maybe…. Counting? Counting in various languages to calm yourself down. Rewire your brain and action, condition yourself. I hope I’m making sense here. 

5. How do I tune into my feelings? - Six of Cups

Emotional satisfaction is one thing I’m seeing as you’re called to reconnect with your inner child. There’s some form of recollection? Like, remembering the past to affirm yourself in the present. There’s a lot of anger I’m sensing in your current phase and that you’re called to remember the past, to remember the nice and not so nice things that have happened to you, telling yourself that you’ve worked hard and did your best despite all that had happened to you, that you’re doing a good job even when you’re walking on this lonely path, that you’ve sustained yourself and held on to the light and prayers you’ve been having with you.

6. What happens when I welcome the world with my new found feelings? - Seven of Cups rx

There will be some form of clarity that you’ll obtain, allowing yourself to proceed ahead with a goal in your head. There’s some form of awakening, where you wake up and pull yourself away from all the imaginations and illusions that you’ve been drowning yourself in. You know that you’ll get stronger day by day as you live truthfully to yourself, and that’s what you will and shall do. I’m also seeing that you’ll learn the beauty of life where you learn to appreciate it, and start to be more passionate about life.

Overall energy: The Emperor, King of Swords

I’m seeing a sharp energy over here. Emperor and King denote some temper here, where you can be acting kingly. High chances are that you’re in a leadership position, or have been leading yourself out of the troubles of life. Weirdly I’m also seeing something like… The sharp energy being directed inwards, where you may have caused some form of discomfort in yourself when you make a particular decision. Still, you surround yourself with those who support your vision, and there’s a sense of promise here where you’ll stay with those who you value and cherish.

.

..

...

Pile 4

Card of querent: Strength

You’re holding in strength and you’re not unleashing them anytime soon. It’s a quiet strength that I’m feeling, where you’re allowing yourself to grow stronger day by day, making sure that you’re working on whatever that’s gonna benefit you. I’m also seeing gentleness. Where you’re learning to be gentle to yourself and to also learn about acceptance, overcoming challenges by accepting things as they are and by being kind to yourself.

1. What negative/unhelpful expectations do I have towards myself? - The Magician rx

Similar to Pile 1, I feel that you may attempt to master as many skills as possible. But there’s a hint of competitiveness I’m seeing here, where you tend to compare yourself to other people who are 1) more experienced than you or 2) who have better chances/opportunities than you. The starting ground is different and yet you attempt to achieve better results in a shorter time, which makes the expectations you have for yourself unhealthy. There’s also this side of you who’s… Unwilling to accept the fact that outer circumstances can influence your capability, and you may end up putting more pressure onto yourself, which will make you end up in burn outs.

2. How have those expectations been holding me back? - Queen of Cups

They have obstructed you from being in tune with yourself. You’ve been so goal oriented to the point you’d sacrifice yourself and sometimes, even others, so that you can achieve what you wanted. Slowly, you start to lose yourself, lose your values, and maybe even lose what you thought was yours. For example, friends. You’ll need time and effort to maintain a healthy friendship. But sometimes, you’ve been so immersed in achieving your career goals to the point you may push your friends away and get close to someone else just for the sake of networking. In this case, you slowly lost the friendship that you thought wouldn’t change, but when you look back, things have changed drastically, especially in terms of emotions and interpersonal relationships. The reason I came up with this example is cuz Cups rule over emotions and the Queen rules over inner nurturing energy. 

3. Why should I break those walls of expectations? - Justice

It is to do yourself and the people around you justice. There are so many instances where your expectations have obstructed you from the balance in life. This aside, it has also stopped you from listening to the voices of the people around you. I’m seeing that you’ve been in your head for a long time and you actually have problems in getting out of them. The main colour theme in this card here is purple, but I’m also seeing some sort of fear and denial? So yeah, to do yourself justice, to treat the people around you with the needed kindness, to be able to be in tune with yourself so that you can receive the messages around you. It may sound difficult when you’re very much in your head, but there’s a need to trust in your feelings and let them guide you at times.

4. How do I break those walls? - Eight of Wands rx

Be patient, do not rush things through. The walls can only be broken down bit by bit. Even when life crashes in like a wrecking ball, the walls won’t be completely crushed within a single hit. It’ll take time, constant effort and patience. This in time, will be frustrating to you. But have faith, allow yourself to transition from the old to the new. These all sound difficult to achieve, but instead of looking for reasons to convince yourself that it’s impossible, know that time will pass eventually and you might as well use that time to pull the best out of yourself.

5. How do I tune into my feelings? - Knight of Pentacles rx

In your case, I’d suggest trying something traditional? Going back to your roots, to look at what you’ve done in the past and try gaining some insight from your experiences. There’s some sort of stagnation and you may have problems figuring out how to tune into those new found feelings. Probably going back to your roots and picking up a new habit, where you’ll be required to have patience and to continue doing the same thing everyday to make it a habit. For some reason, I’m seeing meditation and exercise. It’s gonna take time, and you may feel like giving up, but try doing it everyday to make it as natural as eating. 

I’m also seeing that you may want to try rekindling your past passion. You once were into something because that something provides comfort. It would probably be nice for you to try getting back to it where you can reconnect with a nostalgic past. Maybe start painting, pick up a book, or something like that.

6. What happens when I welcome the world with my new found feelings? - Four of Pentacles rx

I feel that you’ll be more self secured and stable, financially and physically. It feels like things have been rather rushed for you for these while. There is a lot of tension and motion that has been going on in your life, where you slowly lost touch with yourself. Once you’ve released the tension, you’ll be able to complete things and tasks at your own pace, and to not lose yourself from all that has been happening around you, to not be swayed by the waves around you. I’m seeing that you’ll be able to stand and welcome the wind that’s blowing against you. 

Overall energy: Temperance, Wheel of Fortune

The theme of balance is once again being reminded here. Ngl, I’ve had trouble writing this pile, like there’s some sort of blockage, some sort of stagnant energy. But paired with the Wheel of Fortune, I’m seeing this as a divine timing, where it’s just the perfect timing for you to head towards your dreams, to achieve whatever you’re aiming, to manifest your goals and desires. You probably may have some self esteem issues? Where you think you have to earn your own value? The cards want to assure that you’re beloved, you’re good enough for being yourself. 

#tuliptic #🌷 #pick a card #pick a pile #pick a picture #tarot reading #general tarot reading #break the wall #yes my atiny soul is here and it's back full fledged #i actually planned this since uhhhhh february lmAO #but couldn't come up with the questions for it #so now you have it! #yeet #hope y'all enjoy it

[wehaveimagineshere]

Hmmmmmm. Noticed no one has requested some Carlos smut yet and that last fic gave me an idea. How about a fic where the two "break in their new bed" for the first time. afab if you need specifics. Happy writing!

(Also idk if this will be an issue but could you avoid the topic of degradation? It's a bit of a trigger for me. Just wanna make sure cuz sometimes people add it in when I don't specify. Thanks.)

Thank you for being my first Carlos smut request <3 I've been so excited to write this, you have no idea.

Of course! Honestly, I'm not much of a fan of degradation myself. Besides, I think Carlos has a huge praise kink and wouldn't even think about degrading unless it was something his s/o was into. Thank you for specifying and making sure (: I always want to write something that makes the requestor happy, so I never want to make you uncomfortable. The more specifics, the better!

~*~*~

A new place always came with an undercurrent of excitement. Finding where each little nick knack belongs, decorating just the right way to scratch that long time itch, learning more about the person you're with by seeing how they unpack with you.

It was always a lot of work, but by the end of the day, seeing all the new placements and knowing everything is yours can't be beat.

"Look at it," you hear Carlos from the bedroom as you peek your head in. Hands on hips, you find his eyes surveying the bed.

"Look at...the bed?" you ask, lips pulling up.

"Yeah, look at it. It's so...neat."

"....Yeeaahh?"

"We can't have a neat bed."

"....Wwhhyyyy?"

"Because you and me don't do neat beds." He smiles at the utterly confused look you give him. "We need to break it in."

"Break in a bed?"

"Yeah. You. Me. Naked. On this bed. Having the hottest sex of our lives."

Your eyebrows raise as you give the bed another, different appraisal, and the heat in your eyes as you shift your gaze back to your husband makes him smirk. Giving a dramatic sigh, you lean against the doorframe. "I really wanted to get the kitchen all unpacked before the day was over though."

He takes a step toward you. "Did you?"

Looking at your nails in faux attention, you sigh again. "It might take all night."

You hear him chuckle, then feel his hands glide down your sides to rest on your hips. "You need to take a break at some point." His fingers find the edge of your shirt and push up, fingertips grazing your skin.

"Breaks are important." Abandoning your nails, you wrap your arms around his neck and plant a kiss to his jaw. "What did you have in mind?"

Warm hands trail up your sides and spine, tugging your shirt up with them. "You, me, and this bed." Before you can respond, he steals your lips with your own, diving his tongue into your mouth almost desperately.

You immediately draw closer, pressing your body up against his, returning the kiss with equal fervor. He breaks apart only to shuck your shirt off, hands immediately going back to trailing fire across your skin as your own fingers find their way into his hair.

His kisses are always intoxicating, and by the time your knees hit the edge of the bed, you've lost your pants and he's lost his shirt. As your back hits the brand new comforter, his lips find your collarbone, trailing down your sternum, find a nipple and suck it in, teeth biting down just enough to smart.

Your back arches without your consent, flames licking down your veins as his tongue flicks across your nipple before moving to the next, a stray hand stroking gently down your stomach and along the edges of your panties.

You're squirming by the time his lips abandon your chest and move lower, that incessant hand still stroking, teasing. It's not until his lips graze your panties that that hand hooks and takes the fabric down your thighs, bearing you to the tongue that quickly slides between your folds.

Hands grip the comforter as your breath hitches, and you can feel Carlos' smile against your skin as he licks you again, and again, gripping your thighs to keep you still. He keeps a slow, agonizing pace, pressure almost a whisper, and you love and hate that he's pressing your hips down to prevent the friction you so crave.

When your nerves are wired and anticipation drips between your legs Carlos finally leans back, quickly chucking the rest of his clothes to the floor and slides up, positioning himself at your entrance as he kisses you, your taste flooding your mouth.

"Ready sweetheart?" he asks, voice husky, and all you can do is nod.

He goes slow, giving you time to adjust as he slides in. Your hands grip his shoulders as he fills you, stretches you, the fire turning to molten lava when he makes it to the hilt and slides out. A nod from you tells him you're okay, and that's when he really moves.

Not too fast, not too slow, he finds just the perfect rhythm to get you a squirming, sweating mess. Breathing becomes an afterthought as his thumb pressing against your clit and all you can feel is him, the pressure, the movement, the friction, and you know he's driving you the climax when your stomach tightens.

"Look at you," you hear him breathe, thumb rubbing circles over your swollen clit.

"Carlos," you nearly beg, language slipping from your mind and tongue like sand.

"I know, baby. Cum for me."

So you do.

It slams into your hard and fast, wiping your vision into white as you arch back and cry out, nerves fraying and snapping as wave after wave of pleasure crashes into you.

"I've got you," you hear him beside your ear, not knowing when he'd wrapped his arms around you. "I've got you." Kisses pepper your forehead, your cheeks, your jaw. "I've got you."

Finally you can take a breath, the stars in your vision fizzing out. Carlos brings your head to his chest, his heartbeat loud and fast. "Give us both a couple minutes and we can keep going."

A chuckle escapes as you lean over and give his cheek a kiss, a hand already gliding down his stomach. "You think you get a rest, big guy?"

The smile he gives you is absolutely wicked.

#resident evil #carlos oliveira #carlos oliveira/reader #carlos oliveira x reader #smut

[raven-the-claw]

A Complete Guide To Chaotic Academia

bc its my fav aesthetic and there is not enough content about it

Outfits

most people say that chaotic academia is just dark academia but a little bit more messy, and, well, chaotic. the truth is, chaotic academia is A LOT more messy than dark academia. you can still use dark academia as kind of a "base", but you are going to replace your blazers with flannels, your turtlenecks with tshirts. as for pants, you can go with litteraly anything: cigarette pants, tailored trousers, ripped-up jeans or normal black leggings. i personally really ike ripped up overalls bc they give that "i dont really give a damn, im so misunderstood, my parents didnt love me, im a crazy lonely introverted teenage child" vibe...idk. whatever you wear, make sure you feel comfortable in it! even tho in chaotic academia there are almost no rules at all, here are some things that might help you!

colours: any earthy tones are fine, brown, caramel, dark green, dark red, white, etc etc

fictional characters that might inspire you:

-remus lupin

- any dpc character

- jess mariano

- sydney novak

accesories: flannels (a personal fav + they make even the most boring fit look better), cardigans, converse (bonus points if you draw/write on them or if you have them laced in a weird way), bracelets or necklaces that mean something to you, harry potter back packs, tote bags...

hairstyles: whatever you want, just make sure your hair is ALWAYS messy, looking like you just fucking woke up

Activities and Traits

ok now we're getting to the actually important part bc (repeat after me): chaotic academia is not about how you look, its about how you live and how you act. so here r some thing that might help:

- annotating books with the most unhinged random thoughts

- learning poetry or speeches word for word but not remembering most of the things for school

- studying in the (school) library and being besties with the librarian (optional)

- leaving notes (on trees, mailboxes or library books) for strangers to find

- "studying while listening to classical music" and then instead of studying you end up agressivly mouthing your favorite song

- im sure yall already heard this one, but yes, swearing and slag while discussing deep academic topics is incredibly important

- speaking of important topics: posting something important on social media knowing no one will read it

- doodles on your hands 24/7 (NO SUSAN, I DONT GIVE A DAMN THAT ITS BAD FOR MY SKIN)

- sarcasm. a lot.

- random thoughts

- random quotes

- knowing a ton of conspiracy theories that you dont even beileve in by heart

- listening to all different types of podcasts

- one day reading the classics, the next ya fantasy and day after that ao3 smut

- multifandom, multishipper

- tea/coffee addiction

- adding b.c. to todays date when writing it in school

- random thoughts and the weirdest annotations in your school notebooks, especially the classes that you find boring

- "going to the bathroom" and then spending half of your math class drawing/reading/smoking/crying/thinking/whatever the fuck you wanna do there bc ur tired of everything

- stealing random stuff from stores (tho it is not encouraged blah blah blah)

- watching gilmore girls every fall

- telling people ur favorite colour is green even tho it isnt just to let them know that ur gay

- reading in class, on breaks, at home, parks, meetings, aethletic events, and generally all the fucking time

- doing (mostly) everything last minute

- bad at photography, but you enjoy it

- cold tea my beloved

- wearing one item every day: it can either be a necklace, a flannel, a bracelet, a badge, headphones, earrings etc etc

- extremely messy handwriting, always writing with black pen

- crying at least once a day, but only when ur alone, being super emotional but never showing it

- hobbies include reading, screaming in your pillow, learning unique languages that you will probably never use, rewatching dead poets society, harry potter, enola holmes, end of the fucking world and gilmore girls

- massive bookworm, reads all the time, always has a book with them

- skipping class, not that often tho

- 💫anger issues💫

- hyperactive and lazy at the same time

- uses big words but makes fun of other people when they do it

- writes (rebellious) book quotes everywhere, every single one of their notebooks had IF WE BURN, YOU BURN WITH US written in them lol

- random useless powerpoints

- analysing taylor swift's folklore and evermore instead of sheakspeare because its just better

- retired almost-emo, had a phase when they wore black and acted all mysterious but were never really emo i cant explain it

- likes mcr. this one speaks for itself.

- gay and sad. no explanation needed.

Books, Movies and Music

Books:

- Harry Potter by you know who (WE DONT SUPPORT HER THO)

- The Secret History by Donna Tartt

- Night School by CJ Daugherty (is that how u spell it lol)

- The Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo

- Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo

- Heartstopper by Alice Oseman

- Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

- Emma by Jane Austen

- Hamlet by Do I Really Need To Say Who

- The Perks Of Being A Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

- The Picture of Dorain Gray by Oscar Wilde

- Frankenstein by Marry Shelley

Movies/TV Shows

- end of the fucking world

- heartstopper

- harry potter

- enola holmes

- dead poets society

- gilmore girls

- httyd (no kidding lol)

im not really a film girlie so if yall have any recs please lmk

Music:

- Mother Mother

- Taylor Swift (obviously)

- Lana Del Slay

- Conan Gray

- Olivia Rodrigo

- My Chemical Romance

- Lovejoy

- Bowie

- Queen

- Radiohead

- Björk

- Those random Disney songs i know you scream to at 3am

also whoever sings the IMJUSTATEENAGEDIRTBAGBAABBYY song

here is my playlist if yall wanna listen to it

hope that helps lol

#chaotic academia #academia aesthetic #light academia #dark academia #jess mariano #dead poets society #dead gay wizards #why is everyone dead help #gay and sad #books #fanfiction #remus lupin #wolfstar #anti jkr #Spotify

[ukulelegodparent]

hey i just wanted to send an ask as someone who has been like really struggling with this for a while. it was your tag on post about white south africans that went something like people acting like having ancestors in europe gives them some magical tie to that place. i see a lot of posts telling people like me to reclaim their european roots rather than appropriate stuff that doesn't belong to me. is that really the answer? i just feel like i don't l have another option. seeing people with cultural ties that they can draw pride, inspiration, wisdom from and then looking at my own lack of any of that just kind of opened like a deep pit of dread in me as i thought about it more and more. idk even know if you have the answers necessarily its just been eating away at me and that tag kinda just kinda made me really wanna ask on the off chance you had any sort of answer.

Hey, I mean I'm no expert on the topic and can only really speak from my own experience which is mostly as a European interacting with Americans. This won't necessarily match your situation, but I just know more about the situation in the US bc of well. The everything of it.

I mean embrace your roots all you want and look at the culture of your ancestors and keep what you want and leave the rest. It's yours. But let's take someone who is German-American. Their ancestors came there in the mid 19th century and that is their latest direct cultural tie to Germany. Or German lands or whatever. It's the middle of the 19th century. It's complicated. Point is those ancestors left a society where their specific culture (whatever region they were living in) was the majority and went into a culture where it was the minority. So either they assimilate or they form a smaller community with other Germans. Either way at that point they are cut off from the main bulk of what they consider their culture. They themselves will have strong cultural influences from the culture that surrounds them and even without that the culture on it's own will slowly warp and change. So too will their language. Maybe they stop speaking German in the first generation, maybe during one of the world wars, maybe there are still parts of the adult population of that community that speak a form of German. What that German-American person would consider the traditions and culture that were passed down to them from the German side of the family might have very little to do with anything that was part of the culture of those initial immigrants to the US. Now while all that was happening German culture in Germany also changed a lot. Between Unification, a world war, the establishment of a democratic system, the absolute turmoil of the 20s, female emancipation, fascism, another world war, a refugee crisis, another dictatorship, a lot of immigration from Turkey and Italy, the establishment of the EU, reunification etc etc. German culture in Germany is also drastically different from what it was in the mid 19th century when those ancestors left.

So that is the one slightly odd thing that like. People talk about their what they consider their own culture and they call it eg "German" or "Polish" or whatever, but the culture they have has just been through a lot of washes. Which is fine, but it is a bit silly when people post pictures of two old women on a cemetery and they want to call them 'sweet ladies' but end up calling them 'old hags'. But also by calling it like a culture that has a whole country attached to it it's a bit like they're declaring themselves experts which. I mean it leads to miscommunication is all I'm saying. And also there's the point that ethnicity just doesn't work like that in Europe. It's just not carried down that far through the family. I might have had Polish or Dutch or Danish ancestors in the early 19th century but I literally would never know. So it's odd to us here for people to build their identity around something that lies so far in their past. Again. This is the part that is just a little odd, will get people made fun of etc. Maybe a little annoying at times but whatever. 'you have yours over there and we have ours over here' is the name of the game.

The frustrating thing is when people with this history act like they have any sort authority on these things. And especially the frequent (Especially American) 'Bull in a China shop' moments you get where people then base their entire personality around stereotypes and come here and act like they belong. And just. There is sometimes this deep unawareness with especially Americans that they are foreigners here. Of course with Americans the cultural imperialism plays into the frustration here but I see it even with my cousin who grew up in Aotearoa and who also just. I mean both of her parents are German, a lot of their friends are and they've visited almost every year she's been alive and yet, when she says she wants to study here all I can think is 'Girl you will have the biggest culture shock of your life' and her parents literally barely have Kiwi citizenship.

And it might also be from the European side an attempt to remove oneself from colonialism, though I don't think that's the case. There is a huge cultural divide, especially between continental Europe and the Anglosphere. But mostly I mean culture is a living breathing thing that people have to actively participate in to be a part of it. And wherever in Europe your roots may lie, by nature of living on the other side of the world you cannot participate in those traditions and you will be part of a different culture. Like my culture to me is Easter Fires just as much as getting a Döner after a long night out and getting fresh bread rolls from a bakery on a Sunday morning and not being able to go shopping on a Sunday and terrible terrible Apres-Ski music (that I must admit I indulge in sometimes) and the stellar parody dubs of 2010 German Youtube and hearing church bells, and the architecture and the language omg the language, the beautiful poems, having to suffer through Faust in school, the supermarkets, the way towns work here, the way winter smells, the way my grandfather talks and the way my great-grand aunt talks, the forests, the mountains, the fields, not going to the Oktoberfest, not because I don't have the means to but because growing up I was taught to despise it and all things Munich with it, good Brezen, amazing lentil stew (from the can of course), the list goes on and on and on. And some of these are really specific to me and some are more general. And like if you want to connect with your roots, I'm genuinely happy for you, have fun! But for our hypothetical German American, whatever sits at the heart of German and European culture (bread and a certain grumpiness seem to be a big component of both) it will probably never be truly hers. Even if she were to move here. And that's fine. I mean. Idk which post you saw bc there actually were two where I left comments like that in the tags, but one of them listed a lot of examples of what culture can be and of why the 'haha white people have no culture' thing is inaccurate. Maybe it's just that it's hard to see sometimes when your culture is so squarely the majority you never ever have to think about it. Idk. I look around me and even between the regions I've lived in there are such stark cultural differences. Culture can be the songs you sing for children to fall asleep, what the most prominent mode of transport is, where you go to eat, what you eat, what you cook, whether you cook at all, whether you go to church, whether there are crosses hanging everywhere despite rarely anyone ever going to church, what you wear, especially outside of traditional clothing. Maybe at the core of this discomfort I expressed in those tags is also the big question of 'why are you looking here for guidance? You are so different.'

#this is chaotic but I hope it was at least a little helpful? #it's also very long #feel free to add to it or whatever #I will go get groceries now #ask #anon

[wiiltted]

Meet the Spraypainter!

DISCLAIMER: I HEADCANON MEDIC AS AGENDER AND BISEXUAL!! Medic x Spraypainter is Yuri!!! 😭

okay I wanted to make a proper introduction post for them .. and fair warning their lore is pretty intricate and detailed. If you don't wanna read it all I totally get it!

The Spraypainter is the tenth class, their job is to mark enemy territory, they also can assist other teammates by marking spies. They have a bratty personality and are very stubborn. They enjoy cats, drawing, spray painting, and researching random topics. They hang around Heavy, Chemist, and Medic the most.

TW: Experiments, kidnapping mentioned!!

They are Heavys adopted sibling, and lived most of their childhood in Siberia. Until one day, they had wandered out of the house and was kidnapped by Engineer's father, Radigan Conagher. He wanted to test the effects of Australium on the body; Needing a test subject, he kidnapped some random kid he found in the woods. (Can you tell I haven't fleshed this part out yet...)

Luca spent the rest of their childhood in a secluded lab. They don't remember what it was called really, but they knew that they were surrounded by trees and trees and more trees. They learned English from CMedic (classic Blu medic bc he looks like he'd be nice idk...) and also met young Engie. He tagged along with his dad at work sometimes. They got along very nice. Sometimes, Admin would bring Luca into her office and let them play with toys while she did her work. Somewhere deep down she felt a little bit bad for the kid, but obviously not bad enough to stop the experimenting on them. She also enjoyed the thought of having a kid, despite never having her own child. They filled that void for her just fine.

At some point, they were able to escape the lab. Somewhere at about 17, they spent days walking through the woods and hiding from the guard dogs at the lab. But hey, they made it out alive and that's all that matters.

From here their backstory gets kind of rocky. I'm not sure what their life is like from this point on until they receive a letter from Pauling, explaining that she needs them to work for her and Admin.

Some extra facts!

-They have a cat named Mojo

-Some Australium is still in their blood, although very little. The only reason the Australium lingers is because of the amount of times it was extracted and injected into their bloodstream. It kind of mixed with their blood. It doesn't give them any extra buffs or anything, but it did change their hair color to grey and also gives their blood a slight metallic effect to it.

-Their favorite color is blue and they hate their uniform.

-They are pretty rich, their shirt is expensive and they flex their richness off to spy. (These two don't get along)

Thanks for reading! I hope you guys enjoy them as much as I do... also if you have ideas for their backstory or anything please let me know!

#art #artist #original art #original character #tf2 zhanna #team fortress 2 #tf2 heavy #tf2 medic #tf2 spy #tf2 engineer #Self insert #self insert x canon #TF2 Spraypainter #Spraypainter TF2 #i am cringe but i am free #Pls like

[theloveinc]

just watched southpaw for the first time and cant stop thinking about boxer bkg yum yum yummmmmm

(this is so messy, i’m sorry) yughhh, I have such a hard time w/ boxer!aus because I never want to be … cliche with them. You know, meeting when he saves you from something and then slowly falling love only for him to defend your honor in a match of some sort. Like I love that, don’t get me wrong but… i don’t wanna copy or just write a do-over, either!!

Plus, I’ve never seen southpaw, nor do I want you to die… so I wonder, how do you meet? How do you fall in love??? (the only boxing movie I’ve seen is million dollar baby and we all know how that ends…)

But i like the thought of being boxer!Bakugo’s partner or spouse……. and the thought of visiting him at his dojo🥺 … always bandaged up in his ratty gym shorts, topless and showing off his numerous scars and bruises and tattoos…

There’s one by my aunt’s house that has these big glass windows that let you see inside, so I’m kinda imagining that maybe you stop to watch the sparring for a couple minutes every day. Still in work clothes, wrapped up in your cute little scarf and hat to keep you warm outside in the cold.

It’s not even the hot guys that draw you in to watch (the tank of a man with red hair and spikey teeth, the monster with green curls), but just how interesting it is. How they can fight so brutally with each other only to get back up and laugh just as quick (and if the blonde that always seems to notice you doesn’t smile, well, who are who to care).

And idk. Maybe one day they invite you inside, maybe one day you don’t show up and they’re concerned… or maybe you just end up working a double and only cross the dojo’s path when everyone is on their way out… the blonde with a gym bag and the keys locking up and holding back a snarl when you try to rush by.

(He’s not mean, but he’s not sweet yet, either. Just catches your eye for a bit which stops your walk home entirely. he says, “you’re late,” then asks, “gonna get home safe?”

You can’t help but smile. Or try to, at least, feeling a bit silly trying to wave the whole thing off. He doesn’t seem to care.)

But that’s not the end of your interactions, and soon, the man who introduces himself as Bakugo, a boxer, is holding the door for you to come watch the hub from inside. Is waiting for you to arrive to start. Is walking you home every night too, BLAHHH.

Anyway, I’m kinda rambling. Like I said, not the best at this topic, though flattered you came to me w/ it🥺

I just think it spirals from there. Or it started off at a different point, and still continues on. To you bringing him warm dinner to take home with him after practice, to sharing the large cupcake your coworker sent home with you … to like, going home with him in general, when he wants to cook for you, too, in return.

And then of course, the other fighters pick up on things, too. I mean, they knew Bakugo had a thing for you (the cute girl in the window, they called you) since the moment they caught him watching you, but now that things are more… official, it’s like you’re the rink mascot they all love and look out for (lest bakugo beat their ass, but that aside).

You become kind of their cheerleader. Prep their ice and stand on their backs. Go to their matches and sit with whoever isn’t competing, leaving marks in kirishima’s thighs and denki’s palms whenever Kat is in the rink… and running to the rail when he wins (always, usually) and getting pulled up by the collar of your shirt to give him his kiss…

(Not to mention all the good luck love you give him before matches, in the locker room, too…)

Despite how aggressive he is with competitors in the rink, once Bakugo finds you, I feel like he starts to calm down a lot more after fights, too. No longer feels the need to boast and gloat (as much) because you’re already there cheering for him, caring for him, waiting to take him home so you can reward him and he can thank you. He honestly refuses to let you go, even during the aftermath when he’s being interviewed or helping to clean up, you’re there with him, making him happier than he’s ever been before to have chosen this path.

(Plus, when you have a beautiful, doting lover, everyone is already jealous, win or lose…)

Interviewers are like, “how are you feeling, Bakugo?” and he’s just rolling his eyes, “like I wanna take a fucking ice bath with my baby. Move.”

-

(kids tw from here on our) And when you finally have your little daughter with him, after you’re married (the whole community coming to your wedding, even former opponents), she’s the literal pride and joy of the dojo… worshipped and SPOILED as all heck by all her aunts and uncles, they probably even carve out a few hours a week for her to do stretching, gymnastics and tumbling on the squishy, gym mat floors.

She always walks into the gym carrying the bag of snacks you made for everyone, and Bakugo never hesitates to stop whatever he’s doing (even if it means sero gets dropped on the floor) just to pick her up and carry her around the whole place instead of practicing. She even gets the hang of yelling at people the way he would, too… calling Kiri “kiwi” and telling him to tighten up his butt when he’s in a plank LOL.

She’s probably even the reason Bakugo ends up semi-retiring (phew) and becoming a coach, because she eventually starts wanting lessons, even if he’s SOOO nervous about her actually fighting anyone.

(He’s like, “maybe we can start with Kiri teaching you mma and wrestling?” And she’s like “I want to punch things, dad :/“)

Nebfjsjdjrkdjjrkfjrjfjfkdkjdjskdjrjrn!!! I adore it!!

#Bakugo #I’m tired #I hope this was okay anon :( #it feels like I didn’t say much even tho I said a lot #but I had fun with it so !!! 💕💓❣️ #I go bed now #caitie things #gen #anon

[starrixle]

my final thoughts on sootcest

ok, so officially im gonna close off my thoughts here. ive received a good amount of feedback so this will be the last thing ill say abt my thoughts on glitterduo/sootcest:

i am indifferent on selfcest shipping. idk if its proship or not, but i will remain distanced either way, for my own and other people's comfort with me and my content

i still enjoy bursonas and i will still keep drawing them and be present in the fandom, but i will not be involved in anything relating to shipping

any glitterduo art i post will be strictly platonic, same for any of the other bursonas

i do not hate or support sootcest, nor will i attack anyone who ships it. i do not care what your opinion is, i won't hate you for shipping bursonas together. just do not involve me in it

it is not my or anyone else's place to speak on wilbur's boundaries, only himself

as for my own boundaries:

do not involve me in discourse relating to sootcest (or selfcest altogether). i dont want to be associated

do not repost my old romantic glitterduo art. i cant force everyone, but id appreciate if any reblogs relating to my older art were deleted

if you disagree with anything i say, it is not worth any more of my time or energy to argue back, and it is not worth yours either

please stop messaging me about sootcest!!! i will leave my inbox open but i will close it if i continue to get messages about it

i haven't given myself much of a chance to step back and realize how much getting involved and constantly feeling the need to post lengthy texts towards by thoughts has taken so much energy out of me. i do regret having an aggresive tone in my past impulsively made posts, which is why ive deleted a lot of them. but from now on, i wish to just remain as an artist that just likes drawing silly little wilbur personas. shipping bursonas shouldn't be a big deal to me. i have made my own mistakes throughout this whole thing, but i at least wanna close things off here.

i know my old glitterduo art has brought enjoyment/comfort to many people, but it has also brought discomfort for others including myself. i know im not gonna be able to please everyone and people will have their disagreements towards me no matter what.

but for the sake of my own comfort, im stepping away from this subject. i have no ill feelings towards anyone who has communicated with me about this topic, and i thank everyone who has been civil towards me and given me advice.

im moving on.

#important

[2d-dreams]

The Four Horsemen of Flatland Art Styles

+ a personal style i came up with.

These are the ones I know of/have seen/draw, and how I refer to them. If you have come up with or seen any other styles let me know ::D

I usually alternate between these styles when drawing depending on mood or the drawing's scene's tone or what characters I'm drawing.

1- "Simply shapes" or faceless or plain style idk

basically they are Just shapes and lines. Colorless/grayscale perhaps. No organs or facial features: merely shapes. Maybe ur tired of this anti chromatist non sense, you just wanna have fun with the shapes, so you color their insides. Pretty simple.

The 1965 Flatland short film is a great example. It is also very great. Go watch it! ::D

2- "Bi-dimensional cellular organisms" AKA Flatland Film style

They look like bacteria lol. Pretty identifiable! have one eye and mouth on one of their sides and little hairs all over! Usually also have simple visible organs, and a characteristic cog shaped brain.

You may either draw Women as stiff lines like in the film, or as bendy lines like snakes.

3- "Bill Cipher" or "Flat Dreamers" style

The shapes are simple, occasionally colored on the insides or bearing patterns. Occasionally also wear clothes or accessories! They usually have one eye on their inside and limbs.

4- "Insides out" or charseraph style

I believe it was charseraph who came up w/this. Correct me if I am wrong ::D

This style portrays a more realistic organ design/arrangement, and is most prominent by the fangs or beaks of the Flatlanders! It is easier to distinguish from the bacteria style because it lacks eyes and hairs/cilia.

Bonus: I made the last/extra style based on non-Euclidean geometry. The style and the world of Flatland inspired by it arent finished yet as I am barely learning about this topic. I will post about it soon though ::D it also bears my view of Flatlander organs, with really the only interesting thing to note being that they have 1 lung and it works more like an accordion than a balloon. Kinda like bug breathing. Will make post on Flat Biology laterrr.

Note: Yeah I forgot about Shapehumans, Humanified Flatlanders, and the Flatland Movie. Cuz I don't draw in those styles. But hey I'm acknowledging them right now !!!

#flatland #art styles #flat dreams #flatland 2007 #funny shapes lol

[yeagerfate]

what their hugs feel like.

pairings: eren, jean, armin, reiner

genre: angsty hurt/comfort

warnings: panic attack (in eren's), jean has to relocate reader’s shoulder, reader walks in on reiner when he’s about to shoot himself (sorry), i love them, you can tell jean and eren and reiner are my fav aot boys (i love them soooooo much mwah mwah), s4 spoilers in reiner's, s1 spoilers in jean’s, can you tell i wrote jean's, reiner’s and armin’s way after i wrote eren's. anyways reiner makes me so sad i want to hug him :( he is so

note: hi, this is my first post on tumblr! i am so excited to post some of my ideas on here. currently, my requests are open. if you have any ideas, let me know! reiner’s is by far my fav out off all of these and i really don’t like armin’s lol, i don’t have a beta reader so i tried to proof read this but idk if it worked, also my top 3: eren, ymir, and reiner/jean i can't choose. is this bad please tell me this isn't bad

-

EREN:

Eren's hugs are determined yet soft.

All he wanted to do in that moment was make you feel safe; an expedition had just ended. You were shaken from the titans you'd seen, eating innocent soldiers who were just doing their jobs

"It’s fine," Eren murmured to you as he held your hands tightly to ground you. It wasn’t fine, and he knew that, but he still told you it anyway. He just wanted you to stop being so terror-stricken

Your hands were shaking, your eyes were darting around like you were looking for a titan to come get you, and you were breathing heavily

"N-no it isn't," You replied, your voice small. "You don't understand, Eren. Those people-"

He had cut you off when he pulled you into a warm hug. "Shh. It’s okay,” He whispered. "We’re okay now, I won't let anything happen to you."

His embrace was welcoming and comforting, and for a moment you'd almost forgotten about what you'd just seen

Your face was hidden in the crook of his neck as you began to calm down. Eren slightly turned his head to the side to kiss your cheek sweetly, his eyes closing as he comforted you silently. His hand went up to cup the back of your head, and he began to rub his hand back and forth as you sobbed quietly

His free hand was drawing circles on your back. Your arms, however, were wrapped around his neck desperately

"You’re my girl," Eren whispers. "I promise I’ll keep you safe."

JEAN

Jean’s hugs are warm and tight. I imagine he has a firm handshake too but that’s off topic lol

During the Battle of Trost, You ran out of fuel for your ODM gear and had to make a run for it while a titan was coming at you. (Though you were saved by a strange, mysterious titan with long brown hair and green eyes. You thought he had a striking similarity to Eren but would never say such a thing out loud especially since you knew how much he hated the titans. Later on you found out you were right though. He does have titan powers!)

While you were trying to get away you’d dislocated your shoulder. Because you’d taken health classes during training, you’d immediately realized what had happened, and a terrible sense of dread ran down your spine. You really didn’t wanna deal with the pain of someone relocating your shoulder

Once you’d found Jean, your best friend who you had a huge crush on, You told him what had happened

His face dropped

“Please, I need you to fix it for me. I don’t want to let some random nurse do it in an uncomfortable, smelly tent after this is over. It hurts so bad, please, jean,” You begged. Nurses and doctors already gave you a lot of anxiety when you were a kid, and now that you were in a life-threatening situation it was even worse

“Okay,” He replied. “Okay, okay, okay…” He muttered to himself, and took a deep breath. He was extremely scared he somehow wouldn’t do it right despite his first-aid training and would hurt you even more

It seemed as soon as he started he finished, but it was the worst pain you’d ever felt in your entire life

You screamed in agony and discomfort, and even though you only dislocated your shoulder, it felt like your entire body was aching

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” He cried out. He immediately pulled you into a hug, wrapping his arms around your back and pulling you in

Tears streamed down your smoke and bloodstained face, and everything felt so overwhelming. You were just glad Jean had done it for you and not some stranger

“Holy shit, fuck, fuck, fuck, that hurt like a son of a bitch,” You gasped out. Your voice was hoarse from all the screaming

And a couple days later, when you finished truly recovering and you finally had time to think about what happened, a small blush had risen to your cheeks, thinking about the way your bestfriend had helped you.

Maybe, you did have a chance…

ARMIN

Armin's hugs are soft and sweet. They’re laced with love

Armin had been completely humiliated in combat training today. Shadis had partnered him up with Marco, one of the worst fighters in the 104th, and yet he still couldn't hold his ground.

He was so embarrassed he didn't even show up to dinner, which made you, Mikasa, and Eren even more concerned. Marco felt horrible

So, you decided to sneak into the boy's dorms. No one else was even there anyway, and you'd never really gotten in trouble before, so you weren't afraid of Shadis

"Armin," You called out, but your voice was cautious. You didn’t want him to be caught off guard

As you walked to his bed, your heart broke. Armin looked like he was both famished and in complete despair. His knees were tucked to his chest and tears spilled out of his baby blue eyes. His blonde hair was messy and knotty, and you could tell he was stressed. You sat next to him and the bed creaked obnoxiously

"How am I supposed to make it if I can't even do good in combat training? It’s so basic, I’m not gonna make it if I can't get better. what am I gonna do? I don't wanna be shipped off to the fields. I-“

"Armin, honey," You cooed, and placed your warm hand on his shoulder. You guided his head to lay on you. "You underestimate yourself. Who cares if you're not as good at combat training? We’re fighting titans, not people. You excel in the education part of training, and you're respected by your peers. I am so proud of you, Armin. I know you will succeed. and if you get shipped off, I’m going too."

Armin sniffled, and as he looked up at the confident look on your face, he knew that you were right. He pulled you in for a hug, and hid his face in your neck.

"Eren’s worried about you. He says he'll beat Marco up if you want him too!"

"NO!"

REINER

Reiner’s hugs are desperate and hesitant. It’s strange for him to receive affection after everything he’s been through

One day, you decided you wanted to surprise Reiner at work. You could tell something was off with your husband but you couldn’t quite tell what it was; you wanted to cheer him up

You didn’t even think of knocking. You visited him so much nowadays that it was an afterthought. And thank the Lord it was

The sight before you was horrifying. You opened your mouth, but not a sound came out. As soon as Reiner saw you enter his office, he freaked the fuck out

He dropped the gun, watching as it made a loud clatter on the wooden floor. His eyes were wide and his sweaty hands were shaking. He looked almost fearful; like the little boy he once used to be… the one who would get screamed at during training because he was so weak

“What… is this?” You dropped the cookies you had made specially for him, but you didn’t care. Suddenly, you were breathing heavily, and if you blinked one more time tears would fall. Your vision was blurry, and the entire room looked shaky.

“What are you doing? Honey… Reiner, please, please don’t leave me. I need you here, please, Rei, stay, stay,” You pleaded, and suddenly your arms were wrapped tightly around him, his face hidden by your stomach. He was still sitting in his chair, completely in shock

You were hyperventilating, shaking, and were about to throw up. What happened? Your sweet Reiner was going to do this to himself? You thought everything had been going good… had you not been paying enough attention to him?

A thousand thoughts were running through your head but they all were interrupted when you felt his strong, muscular arms wrap around your torso. His shoulders shook rapidly, his face hidden away in your shirt, and for the first time in your entire life, you saw him cry

“Sorry, ‘m sorry, please don’t-“ His voice was laced with anguish and despair and all you had ever wanted in that moment was to take his pain away. The sounds of his weeping broke your heart, and his deep voice almost sounded unnatural while crying. You were not used to it at all; he’d always tried to “act like a man” around you, and not worry you. All he did was bottle up his emotions, unbeknownst to you

“It’s okay, we’ll do this together, honey, it’s fine, you’re fine, it’s good,” You breathed out, your voice heavy. You both knew it was definitely not fine, but you’d work through it together. Reiner was your husband, after all.

#eren yeager #eren yeager x reader #eren yeager x you #eren fluff #eren headcanons #eren yeager fluff #eren yeager x y/n #eren jeager #eren jeager fluff #eren jeager x reader #eren jeager x you #eren jeager x y/n #armin arlert #armin arlert fluff #armin fluff #armin arlert x reader #attack on titan #aot x you #aot x reader #aot x y/n #attack on titan x reader #jean kirstein #jean kirstein fluff #jean kirstein x reader #i HATE TAGGING ANDJDDJJSNSM #reiner braun x reader #reiner braun #reiner fluff #reiner angst