#idk i do just like to not feel like a horse

[fisheito]

collab #2 with @xenole i was given a chibi yakumo and i.. i...... turned it into thiS

#I AM SO SORRY I DREW YAKUMO AGAIN ADFSJEIADKS LOOK OK so xenole gives me the tiny crying yakumo. #says DO WHATEVER YOU WANT and THUS i get to thinking #my immediate thought was #i'm going to make oli breast boobily while comforting him #bc i was determined to draw xenole's fave this time. i swore it to myself. i WILL stop being so self indulgent #but the chibi on chibi comforting scene didn't sit right with me. it was too straightforward. not something i would draw normally #it was hhhh as u say.... not on brand.? it did not inspire me. idea benched.... #so days pass and i'm still pondering ideas on what to do to the sad spaghetti. #configurations of clan members danced in my head. some defending yaku. some comforting. some bullying #the ideas usually involved at least oli or kuya bc once again. xenole bias #then while i'm in the shower i got frustrated with my lack of ideas and thought #i'll jujst eat.him. just. chew on him. i'm tired of him #AND THE IMAGE OF KUYA EATING YAKUMO FOR BREAKFAST POPPED INTO MY MIND #originally it was going to be kuya eating yakuflakes and oli giving him serious side eye but then the brain went #WHAT IF IT'S YAKUMO WATCHING KUYA EAT YAKUMO. THAT IS FUNNY. IT MUMST HAPPEEN #BUT I REFUSED at first. i was angry at myself. this is not a competition to see how you can STILL sHOVE YAKUMO into a drawing. #plus the composition would shrink xenole's chibi down! i would take over so much space by comparison! THE DISRESPECT! TO THE COLLAB PROCESS #but once i get fixated on smth...well. i ended up doing the idea and just praying xenole wouldnt eviscerate me for it #i'm sorry my liege. my grip on the reins was weak. the goofy clown horses went stampeding #so idk now it's the two of em having a peaceful breakfast in kuya's cabin but only kuya is at peace and yakumo's this close to a breakdown #i feel like there should be something in the space between them. a speech bubble or something . something mean is being said #kuya #yakumo #yakuya

[skitskatdacat63]

2023 Las Vegas Grand Prix - Qualifiying - Fernando Alonso

#half asleep making these istg #yayyyy p9? idk ig i expected him to do better #old man asleep at the wheel whats new 😴 #he was very quick w this interview i wonder if he was eager to get to bed #i certainly am rn #f1 #formula 1 #fernando alonso #2023 las vegas gp #(i wish i could atop feeling insecure abt my gifs. i do it for fun.) #(of course i want them to look somewhat good but i get a bit ill over it) #(there was somw drama on here at some point that made me want to completely stop posting then ngl) #(cause like what is the point if im not as good as others ig :/ this is kinda vague posting but it made me so uncomfortable) #(as i said. i do it for fun in quick time bcs yay jsut wanna post smth i found cute) #(but ever sincce that thing happened its just made me extremely self critical and insecure abt posting) #(idk why im saying this. kinda repressing the urge tk be like 'SRY THESE ARE TERRIBLE. YEAH.') #(i need to sleep. but i often feel like this literally every time i post now bcs some people get on their high horse and ruin people's fun) #(iykyk ig. its smth bothering me lately. but i hate to act so morose. but i still feel bad abt the quality sometimes. i guess.) #we do a little bit of f1

[how-queerious]

been seein lot of posts calling the cast weird for the way they/their characters are being with the whole "destined" aspect of callowmoore but like consider who does and does not seem to outwardly ship it that way.

maybe there are things and dynamics i've been missing but to me there is a clear division between which characters (not actors) are pushing it and which are not; The main people seeming to push for it are FCG, Imogen, Laudna, and Fearne. The main people just watching and not really swaying either way are Orym, Chet, and Ash. Here's my thoughts on the possible motivations for that from a character perspective. With that in mind, I have focused on the PCs here; I have all the love in the world for matt as a DM, but to untangle the intricacies of his character work in literally even just one episode at a time is a whole other post. Accidental essay below the cut y'all.

broad strokes are that the camps are divided primarily* by who has and hasn't had extensive adult romantic relationships. Laudna, Imogen, and FCG are all experiencing what seem to be their first real adult relationships, and have had notably, explicitly little experience with romance at all beyond that. Fearne herself, despite her age, also seems to have had very little experience with romance and love (remembering that casual or platonic sex is not romance). They have all been starry-eyed and naive about love in prior episodes, and Laudna in particular has a childlike view of it. To compound this, Fearne has been lonely the vast majority of her life, just her, her nana, and their companions of questionable sentience and willingness. Exhibited in some of the darker episodes, and stated by ashley (at some point), she is literally just learning how to feel as mortals do in the prime material plane. Many of us as young shippers were drawn to the allure of the "Soulmate AU" for a lot of the same reasons.

On the other side of the coin, we have the three opposed or neutral. Chet and Orym, unlike any of the others, have both experienced long-term mature romantic relationships. Though Chet often focuses on the sex, and Orym tends not to focus on anything if he can help it, both have shown in their character choices and interactions with people from their past that they have the understanding of mature and healthy(ish) romance. As a contrast to their knowledgability, Ashton has only ever been burned by what should have been love in the past, and has not experienced romance. They have spent their whole life fighting fate, and will continue to do so for at least the time being. He is just learning to let themself love platonically, of course they don't want to follow "fate" to a romantic relationship with someone as chaotic and beautiful and terrifying as Fearne. They'll do the cool combos with her, and he'll flirt and tease, but anything else is unknown territory in a field already littered with the casualties of their past attempts to trust.

Though they may seem to be pushing for this fated dynamic in a way that feels very off for CR, there are genuine and realistic character motivations for them to do so. Perhaps I'm putting too much thought and faith behind it, but I think the specificity of who is or isn't pushing speaks great volumes to the fact that these are all people who have a wealth of theatric and improvisation experience and knowledge behind them. They are all actors with more than my lifetime of hard work behind this "silly game" they play, and I think we ought to consider that.

#like idk them personally but c'MON #aside from their DECADE of play experience #they are all professional actors nd improvisors #i feel like we should give them a little more credit here #long post #in this essay i will #critical role #i do kinda ship callowmoore as fuckbuddies btw #i am projecting my maybe-aro-ness onto fearne about it tho #gimme gimme gimme #callowmoore #callowmoore positive #ashton greymoore #fearne calloway #fresh cut grass (cr) #launda #imogen #southern gothic (cr) #orym of the air ashari #chetney pock o'pea #not to interact with the disk horse i was in the trenches of 2017 broadway and 2018 voltron #but i just had thoughts i hade to give to the universe

[oobbbear]

is there anyone who look at a reference photo and go on to draw a completely different thing? I just went on Pinterest to search for pictures of desserts then drew a horse

#bearz rambling tag #that’s why humans can’t be replaced by AI(?) #bc only humans will give you a horse when the prompt is dessert #idk what I’m doing #I look at reference for aesthetics #I just feel like bubble tea has the same aesthetic as a horse

[saturnvs]

i think western au villaneve live just outside of a town on their own farm and they're a mystery to the townspeople, eve and villanelle are talked about like they're folklore even though they're very real and ride into town like once a month to buy stuff. no one truly knows what the two of them got up to before they settled down on their farm, the stories range from them just being vagabonds who chose to settle down, to robbers, to killers.

when they ride into town everyone backs away out of fear but they're equally curious about them. they're always pleasant with the shopkeepers and smile at the children who want to pet their big horses, but the townspeople claim they see blood on their skin and their clothes. no one knows if they're just mysterious but harmless lesbians or if they're mysterious and harmful lesbians :)

#oh my god the typo in the last sentence took me like 2 hours to notice fuck #if i had the brain power i would go on about this #but do you get the vision??? #people paint up all sorts of stories about them but they don't mind #they keep to themselves and they're happy that way <3 #i've been thinking about what they got up to before they moved to their farm #i could go with canon and say that villanelle was a killer and eve was a sheriff chasing her because that would be fun!! #and then they turned into murder wives instead and probably lived the vagabond lifestyle with their horses for a while #before deciding to settle down #their farm is their alaska basically #idk!! it's fun to think about them :) #i feel like i need to name this au... it's really taking on a life of its own #also it's not set in a specific time period it's just about the vibes

[yourhoeshorses]

“sso is ruined” “I miss the old graphics” “the game died when they updated steves”

shut up shut up shut up, go play the season rider games if you want shitty graphics, explode yourself

the only thing they removed from sso that REALLY mattered was the old silverglade music that would make your ears bleed

#occasionally i get an sso video on my tiktok and its all the same thing #oh boo hoo sso is ruined because now theres things you can do other than stand around and the graphics look better!!! waaaa #there are..... other games made by the same company as sso i hope they know #i love nostalgia #but saying a game is ruined because it gets updated so it can improve is SUCH a lame take #idk #perhaps its just me and sso is one of my main special interests #but like.... #bro #its not that deep #you miss how the game was??? #go on ebay and look for the old games #look for a play through online #its not that deep bro #i also feel like its the same people who only play the game to argue with other people that miss the old version of the game #like yeah man. clearly you miss it. all you used to be able to do was bully other players #why would you want things to actually do when you play the game other than just stand around and go afk #im very passionate about my silly horse game #sso #star stable #star stable online

[hexjulia]

just remembered how this morning woke up in the middle of an incredibly boring debate between two strangers on whether horses ridden by christians were christian as well despite the horses not being baptised. I was just wondering why i was there for it when quite abruptly and that was thankfully no longer the case (woke up).

#why was i present in what i figure was a medieval type situation #i didn't peg it as medieval at the time because i was there. it was just two guys casually talking #as they stood next to two large dark horses holding the bridles #waiting for someone idk who to show up #like. do you ever have dreams that are vivid and if you were superstitious could be believed to be you astral projecting into a the past #only. because your mind is kind of a rudderless instrument you just end up spying on the most irrelevant things in existence #that's how it feels. now how it actually happened is probably because i have a severe debilitating wikipedia addiction #and my mind tries to make a narrative out of random bits and bops about historical events and theological debates i'm vaguely aware of

[strrwbrrryjam]

i wish it was feasible for me to run away, get off the grid and just, leave, leave my family, my peers, and my education and just leave, be alone with myself in the woods for a while, not having to worry about the consequences for when i come back

#im too much of a coward to do so. the consequences would be huge and i. really don't know how to survive in the woods #honestly it makes sense that rdr2 is like. a big thing to me and something I've connected the most to #outside of all the death n destruction n heartbreak its just. pure escapism most of the time #youre on your own with just your horse. and its. nice. peaceful. #im so tired all the time. i feel this constant crushing weight on me. im just. idk. #i feel like the real me died years ago n im just. whats left. a husk. #idk. im sorry. #strawberry speaks

[shysimblr]

So once I fixed my horse issue l, I actually started playing with them and as someone who wasn’t bothered whether we got horses or not I can say I keep getting excited and telling my husband to look at how cute my horse is lol 😂

#I am terrified of horse irl #but yeah very cute #I’m like all my sims will have horses now #but we all know that’s not true #also is it just me or does that new world feel very limiting like you can only really do horse stuff in it? #anyhoo #idk what to do in this game rn

[quietplaceinthestars]

I wish people who write lotr fanfic didn’t inevitably end up writing low key constant emotional abuse to their blorbo.

#kicking a hornets nest here #but I’ll start reading something lighthearted and wonder I start feeling more and more uncomfortable the further in I get #the Peter jacksonification and what I suspect are culturally W.A.S.P ppl writing fic #without having read the books or. rely on period dramas for world building #idk it just ends up creating what feels like something deeply insidious masqarading as some teen fixit fic where everybody lives #and then I feel insane and overly sensitive for wanting half the shire Gandalf thranduil and 2/3ds the dwarves & bilbo to kill them selves #bc I cannot fathom how a any fuckjng says that b why would let someone say or do something like that to you #and then I realize it’s. it’s the same reylo #it’s the same 50 shades of grey mentality type stuff #I hate to assume anything about anyone’s identity over one fic. but be fr. either you genuinely believe this is normal or you’re writing #you’re writing it for plot reasons. and like. that’s how you advance the plot? I’d rather read dead dove at this point. #fuck it everyone dies. #talking tag #this is obv. a massive generalization. gods know I beat the hell out of my blorbos #but I am tired. the horse is dead and you’ve beaten it so much it’s glue and fish is toothpaste.

[feartheoldblog]

shoutout to sekiro for being the only game in recent memory to make my want to bite my controller

#HOWWWWWWWW AM I MEANT TO DO THIS 😭😭😭 #bro is on a horse and so fast and i can get like 3 hits in b4 he hits again then parries me ughhhhh #i tried the grappling but it’s hard #why doesn’t wolf just jump on the horse and bite him idk #feel like pure shit just want to see isshin so i can die happy

[stone-stars]

i can already anticipate the “death doesn’t matter now” disk horse if they come back somehow next week, and my counterargument is it would be so boring for multiple cast members to come back in with new characters every few sessions in a high lethality campaign. it’d be fun in a home game, but for entertainment purposes it’d get old after the fourth episode largely dedicated to meeting someone new.

#edit; #this is not a dunk #i think the d20 team cares about their stories #and won’t do something that feels unsatisfying #they will find a way to make things work #i’m adding this because #i went into the tags and sure enough #it is all disk horse #and like. idk #‘the story is unsatisfying/this ruined the story’ #the story is less than a quarter of the way through #give it some time to actually……. happen #dimension 20 spoilers #neverafter spoilers #ofc if they do make new characters every time that’s fine #and i’m sure they’ll find a way to balance it #i just think it’s more entertaining if you can actually watch the characters #yknow #grow #and change #and not [appears / drops some interesting character potential / dies] #hanbles

[socialist-microwave-laser]

all those people complaining about ao3 getting so much money should hear about this thing called the met gala

#idk just. there are other charities that could use this amount of attention. maybe switch it up every year! it just feels like a big circle #jerk. especially on fucking may day!!! idk like don't get me wrong funding the arts is important but also this money isn't even going to The #Arts™️ it's going to the met while arts programs across the country are getting gutted and artists are starving on the street or forced to #not do art so they can survive. actually you know what? the met gala is a fantastic example of what's wrong about charity culture. making #participation a big spectacle to the point that the recipient is fetishized. also zero engagement with the systemic context that is so #integral to actually addressing what the charity purports to address. like yeah it's 'for a good cause' but what's the actual materialeffect #anyway donating to ao3 is not the same imo it is not nearly such a spectacle and it is a much more grounded project. am i making any sense? #my pain meds haven't kicked in yet and i'm having a hard time breathing. forget thinking lmfao #anyway auth leftists go away this post isn't for you. this is specifically about anarchism #also fuck off with that ao3 disk horse bs! archives are so important and ao3 was specifically created to house the stuff that wasn't allowed #on other platforms. yes that means assholes access the website. those are the symptoms of being in an unmoderated space in a society where #assholes live. that doesn't mean we need to take down ao3 #anarchist #met gala #ao3

[supercantaloupe]

beginning to not have fun with these opera bracket posts tbh

#some of you guys are being really mean honestly. and i think that's really pathetic and unnecessary. #'why are people complaining about us voting for the Objectively Best Operas' cause it's not about what's Objectively Best #(there literally cannot be an Objective best if people are this argumentative about it....cause then it's.....subjective....) #it's about what You Personally Like More. every poll is literally titled 'which do you prefer' not 'which is Best(tm)' #which. sure sometimes we like things because we think they're the most well crafted works available #but also sometimes we like things that are just. fun. not necessarily Artistic Masterpieces. but they're enjoyable #and there is no moral or intellectual superiority attached to which opera you like best #for gd's sake. #'why are you people taking this so personally and whining about everything' well you are saying that people should be banned from #Watching Opera and or that you would like to kill someone/yourself if your choice doesn't win #or that people are literally brainless troglodytes for voting against your taste #and like #idk #i think it's valid to be upset about that? #'have you noticed that the people who Complain are Objectively Wrong' how do you say this with a straight face #and still feel comfortable up on that high horse of yours? #whatever i guess. you guys can have fun pretending that the forza or don carlo guys are making out or whatever #but it's just. unnecessarily mean to pretend like anyone who disagrees or has slightly different taste is Stupid and Wrong #i wanna talk about me #it's probably obvious that there's a particular post i'm referring to with this but i'm not gonna link it #because i don't want to directly get embroiled in anything. don't fucking @ me to argue i will honestly just block you #you can reply if you want guess but if you're rude or weird. watch out. #it's yom kippur. i have bigger things to focus on than fucking bitichfights on tumblr over the most pointless popularity contest yet devise

[moonchild-in-blue]

I wanna ride a centaur.

#we watched Chronicles of Narnia last night as well and. hm. #imagine that. like. how would that work #cus you can make out fine with the human part but #i guess the centaur rides you???? can horses lie on their back even??? #would that make an extra long weird human-horse torso??? #i am genuinely intrigued #if a human rides a centaur (and this time i DO mean actual horseback riding) would that be comfy for them? #would they get turned on by the skin contact? or is it like a piggyback ride? #i know female horses have teats cus milk for the babies. but what about male horses? do they have nipples? #would a centaur feel more (as in more sensitive) in the human skin or horse skin? cus the horse half is covered in fur so #idk man i just. mh #queuing this for the morning cus it's quite late and i can't engage in centaur discourse now #Chronicles of Narnia changed my brain chemistry in a lot of different ways. Edmund has a lip cut for most of the movie #and i've always thought that was so hot #i understand now why but back then i was very 👁️🫦👁️ #what about Mr Tumnus though? he kinda- #OKAY it's enough #good morning 🙂

[lettucedloophole]

i hope you are doing well today!

this is a super late response since i haven't been active on here but thank you sm!! 😭🙏 you're so sweet, i really hope you had a good holiday season whichever holiday (if any) you celebrate 💙

#asks #i've been doing good! just more active on twitter rn lol. i think i may take a break though bc twitter is... twitter 🫠 #i miss being on here bc it feels like my thoughts were more coherent and rather than forcing myself to speak on the current Disk Horse #i was able to think through what i said more. and not to say that everyone of my tweets is bad or anything Lol #i just prefer my mindset when i'm on here #in irl news! i moved to a diff more populated & diverse state to start college :] #i'm still getting settled and i've been. at home mostly since idk where to go around here #it kinda sucks but it'll change once i get into school and stuff #now for the monumental task of Make Friend ... 🫡 #wish me luck haha :') #tysm for the ask again! it really makes me feel like a person when i get a hi #i'm always open for convos and questions .. finger guns #okay im getting cringy now goodbye