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startrekfangirl2233-writes · 5 months

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Bookmark my Heart

Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x Reader

Description: You're not the audiobook type. You much prefer reading over listening to books. It would just be your luck that an audiobook got you into this predicament. His eyes are piercing as you fumble with your phone to mute the volume, his voice blaring from the device.

Warnings: None! (Though I do believe Flirty!Rooster is a warning I should call out.)

Themes: Meet-Cute, Flirting, Coffee, Books, Smut Books

Word Count: 3456

A/N: So, if you all aren't aware, today is the lovely @roosterforme's birthday! I couldn't think of a better way to celebrate Em and all of the amazing things she does more than to write some Rooster for her. Happy Birthday! I hope your day is as wonderful as you are! So without further ado, I'm pleased to present you all with Bookmark my Heart, a fic where Bradley Bradshaw is an audiobook narrator and the reader, nicknamed Paper, runs right into him! All my thanks to @horseshoegirl and @desert-fern for beta-reading this fic and catching all of the places where I've missed commas as well as updating my phrasing!

My Masterlist

AO3: Cross-posted Here!

Wattpad: Cross-posted Here!

You’re not the audiobook type. Something about having someone read the pages, providing inflections and changes of tone to the otherwise inflectionless words tends to kill your imagination. So you much prefer reading over listening to the books you’re in the mood to peruse. It would just be your luck that an audiobook got you into this predicament. His eyes are piercing as you fumble with your phone to mute the volume, his voice blaring from the device. But maybe you should back up a little bit.

It all started, like it usually did for you, with a book. Unlike normally though, you aren’t talking about Keats, Byron, Shelley, or Austen. This time, the book that was your downfall was something you’d usually classify as chick-lit. Not that chick-lit is a bad thing. There are quite a few romance novels which are beautifully written and that you enjoy reading and re-reading. It’s just not normal that a romance novel, something smutty and provocative, would end up being talked about on podcasts and the news. That’s not considering how all of your female colleagues seem to be talking about the very same book. But that’s the other interesting thing. They’re not even discussing the book’s contents. More like they’re discussing the narrator’s voice in the audiobook edition - how deep and smooth and raspy it is.

It hadn’t even been a full day before the curiosity got the better of you and you purchased the book from Kindle Unlimited. It took you the better part of two weeks before you actually screwed up the courage to listen to it though. Maybe you shouldn’t have picked a Saturday morning when you were running errands to listen to the book. In your defense, there was no better time to listen to the book other than a day when you’d be spending quite a long time in the car with nothing else to do. You’d definitely miscalculated. Dear lord, this man’s voice?! It’s deep and raspy, something smooth and dark in how he voices the syllables. It’s the kind of voice you’ve once heard referred to as panty-wetting - an epithet you’ve never understood until now.

The book has you squirming as you walk through the grocery store. There’s sweat dripping down your spine as he talks about something involving fighter jets and the men (and women - you always feel like you have to correct) who fly them. You’d never have thought that flaps and ailerons could ever be that alluring. You have to take a minute as you leave the grocery store, sitting in your car in silence practically heaving just at the way the word “Doll” had dripped off of his lips. Maybe you can buy into the hype a little bit. It’s not often that you find a romance book in the male perspective after all. As far as finding the pilots sexy goes, though, what can you say? You’ve seen Top Gun - both movies - those boys in their dress whites are awfully sexy.

You send a little prayer of thanks to Rooster Bradshaw, whoever he is, for narrating this book. Just his voice has already made your boring Saturday running errands a thousand times better. You don't even mind that you're melting in the San Diego heat without the air conditioning on as you collect yourself. At least there is only one thing you have left to do today. As a reward for finishing up your errands, including odious activities like going to the bank and post office and grocery shopping, you'd vowed to treat yourself with a romp through your favorite bookstore.

Like you mentioned earlier, it all started with a book. What can you say? You're nothing if not predictable. The Breezy Bean is your favorite coffee shop and bookstore. It's a small shop nestled right in the midst of cobblestone streets and overshadowed by apartment buildings on either side. It's always a zoo trying to get parking, but you can't regret the competition for parking when the books are as good as they are and the coffee is even better.

Lara's not at the counter, but her business partner and best friend, Emily is, and you wave at her absentmindedly as you tangle the cord of your headphones around your index finger. The entire shop smells like coffee beans, paper and ink. You could spend forever here, and you're sure you have, at the very least, spent the entire day in the shop before. The shelves tower over your head, creaking under the weight of everything they hold. You're not a woman on a mission today, content to just meander until a cover catches your fancy. The eyes eat first, after all, isn't that what they say? If only you knew how true that statement would be.

The whole time you're listening to the book, tasting the words on your tongue seconds after Rooster says them, teasing the syllables out like you're trying to snatch them from his lips. Is it any wonder that after about four hours of listening to his voice, you're starting to imagine what the main character of the book looks like based on how Rooster sounds? You're only human, after all. It's quiet and dim in the back of the store, the shelves lit only by the small lights shining from the wall sconces. This is your favorite section of the store. There's a squashy green armchair here with a small table, and this is where you usually sit and wile away the hours.

It's rare that anyone ever ventures into this corner of the store. So it's a surprise when you see a man standing right in front of your favorite chair. He's tall and ridiculously handsome, wearing an eye-wateringly bright Hawaiian shirt and slim-fitting jeans. Like everyone in California, he's got Ray-Bans flung into the neckline of his tank top. The truly unique part of his look is the mustache he's carefully cultivated on his upper lip. He’s holding a book in long-fingered hands, lips pursed as he scans the pages, leaning gently against one of the shelves.

You try your best to squeeze past him in the narrow aisle, wondering if Em and Lara have squeezed more shelves back here or if you've just gained weight when it happens — your headphone cord snags on the buttons on his open shirt. You try to untangle it, unsuccessfully, but then your phone falls out of your pocket and rips your headphones right out of the jack.

You were just getting to a good part, something filled with innuendo but not quite at the sex. That's your only silver lining. Because when your phone nosedives to the, thankfully, carpeted floor sans your headphones, the audio keeps playing way too loudly for the hushed environment. To add insult to injury, your phone is closer to him than it is to you, and well, you've embarrassed yourself enough. The last thing you need is to get eye-level with a stranger's dick while your phone is narrating smut in a bookstore.

“Good book?” There's a smile on his face, and you nod timidly as he hands you back your phone. You pause the app and turn the volume all the way down before his words, or well, you should say, the sound of his voice sinks in.

If you weren’t mortified before, you're even more so now. Obviously, your brain does not compute, so your brain-to-mouth filter isn't working as you blurt out, “You're Rooster Bradshaw.”

It doesn’t surprise you at all when he starts laughing - a full body, belly laugh which fills the stacks with the mellifluous sound. If you had any doubts before that you'd run into the Rooster Bradshaw at your favorite coffee shop before (which you didn’t - see your intimate knowledge of his voice from earlier), you wouldn’t have any now. His character had actually laughed not fifteen minutes ago in the book. Well, now what are you supposed to do? You feel hot, embarrassment crawling its way up your throat as you shift your weight back and forth. Rooster's smiling at you as he stands back, lounging against the shelf like he's waiting for you to get your shit together. You'd hate to break it to him, but you don't think that's possible.

“I'm sorry.” You try your best to hide your face because he does not need to see what your facial expressions are doing.

“What do you have to be sorry for?” You shrug a shoulder as you busy yourself by turning around and trying to force yourself to read the titles. “It's not every day I run into pretty girls in my favorite bookstore, listening to me narrate a book about US Naval Aviators.”

Flirting shouldn’t be the thing which puts you at ease in this situation. There really must be something wrong with you. You’ve never done anything like this before. What happened to the girl who would have run away the minute the phone fell? She might not be facing down the sexiest man she’s ever seen, but at least that version of her isn’t at risk of heart palpitations.

“I hate to break it to you, Rooster, but a lot of pretty women are listening to you right now. This book has made its way onto podcasts and PBS. The author herself has been interviewed gushing about your professionalism and how you say the word “aileron.” Despite your mortification, you find yourself mirroring his relaxed position against the shelves. “Though I do have to correct a part of your statement there. What about yoga pants, glasses, and a messy bun makes me pretty? Because I’d call myself a mess.”

“Well, I wouldn’t go so far as to say you’re a mess, pretty girl.” Rooster grins as he tugs the shoulder of your cami up from where it is sliding down your arm. “Don’t you know exactly how devastating you look in those yoga pants?”

You’re left dumbstruck, reeling as he leans even closer to you. All of a sudden, you’re inundated with the scent of his cologne as he crowds into your space, and you’re forced to tip your head up to keep eye contact. Of course, the motion makes your glasses tip on your face, and you can’t lift a hand up to resettle them on your face without brushing up against every inch of the man, nearly squishing you into the shelf. There’s a scant few centimeters between you as you try to string words together.

“What makes you think I don’t know how good these pants make my ass look?” You smirk just a little, screwing up all of your courage to peer up at him. “But really, this outfit is comfortable.”

“Comfortable is not how you’re making me feel, honey.” There’s a heat in his gaze as his voice rasps out the words. “But maybe we can both get a little more comfortable and have a cup of coffee together?”

Only two people will ever know if your hand strays right over the seam at the front of his jeans as you walk away. “I’d love to, but maybe you need to take a few minutes in seclusion, Mr. Chicken.”

You feel giddy as you walk away because things like this don’t just happen to girls like you. You don’t flirt with men you've just met. And you definitely do not brush over the dicks of men you've just met! The counter is nearly empty as you walk up, and you know Em has clocked onto the fact that your hands are surprisingly empty of books.

“Hiya, Paper!” You roll your eyes only a little. Buy a stack of paperbacks once a week from a bookstore for months, and this is exactly what you’ll be nicknamed. “No books today?”

“Hey, Em. Can I get a latte, please? And whatever the gentleman in the Hawaiian shirt orders is on me.” You grin at the sight of her eyebrows ticking up until they’re nearly in her hair.

“What has our sweet little Paper been doing today, huh?” You shrug just a little, grinning as she hands you your drink. “I’ve been reading, Em!”

“Of course you have!” You’re laughing as you make your way to a table for two in the corner.

You’re smiling outright when Rooster swaggers out of the shelves a few minutes later, and Em clocks the Hawaiian shirt on his broad frame. She’s half drooling when he orders an Americano. As she turns to make his drink, you get the messages in short order.

What the fuck, Paper!

This is the man you’re buying a coffee for?

Damn, girl! I’m going to need all of the details. STAT!

You put the device away only when the chair opposite yours slides out, and Rooster settles in. You'd promised a full detailing of the encounter to Em, and you wouldn't be surprised if Lara interrogates you the next time you see her as well.

“So, obviously, you come here often, then.” He’s smirking as he sips on his coffee.

“Yup!” You’re just as chipper as you blow over the surface of your own mug.

“You come here often enough that one of the owners just threatened me with the loss of my…” He pauses like he’s not sure if he should laugh or cry as he says the words, “...crown jewels…” and grimaces before continuing, “...if I hurt you.”

“She also called you Paper. Why’s that, Honey?”

You lean forward, feeling just a little more confident as he mirrors your position. “Tit for tat, Bradshaw, if that even is your last name. You tell me something about yourself, I tell you something about myself.”

“Deal?” You stretch your hand out and gasp when he takes it and sets it down to the side of the mugs.

“Deal.”

“I’ll start.” Your faces are inches apart from each other. He's whispering, and you have to lean forward even further so you don't miss a single word. “My name’s Bradley Bradshaw. I didn’t want to use my real name while narrating those books.”

“And Rooster was what you decided on?” His chuckle and yours rise into the air in perfect harmony.

“It was a nickname I got in college. I was always the only guy in the dorm up before 9 A.M.”

You take turns sharing your life stories and quite a few secrets until your coffees are long gone. You find yourself telling him all about how you got your nickname and how you’ve been feeling stuck for the longest time. With Bradley, it doesn’t feel like another boring first date. If it weren’t for the faint hiss of the espresso machine and the clank of mugs and cutlery you wouldn't think there was another person in the room but the two of you. There are butterflies in your stomach, and your entire body shudders when he hooks his ankle around yours and tugs you closer. That point of contact has your blood turning into molten lava in your veins as his hand trails gentle patterns across your upturned palm.

“Hey, Paper?” It takes an inhuman effort to drag your eyes away from the magic Bradley Bradshaw is committing just with your hands in his own.

“Hey, Em.” As you say her name, you realize how dark it is. “The store’s closing, isn’t it?”

“Yup. It actually closed an hour ago. You looked so cute together that I called Lara, and we made an executive decision to let the two of you keep talking for just a bit longer.”

Your face feels extra hot because Em’s looking at you like she’s liable to start laughing at any moment. You don’t want to know what your hair looks like now, not after hours of running your fingers through it. It’s probably even more of a mess than it was when you literally ran into Bradley hours ago. A great first impression, right?

“Let me settle up then, Em.” If your voice is hushed and a little more subdued, it’s because reality and panic are settling in.

“No, sweetheart.” Bradley’s voice is even firmer as he stands up and places a hand on your arm. “Today is on me, I insist.”

You know exactly when Em puts it together, because her eyes widen to a comical degree. She was the biggest reason why you bought the book in the first place. “You’re Rooster Bradshaw!”

For the second time today, you find yourself laughing along with Bradley, though the sounds of his laughter doesn’t put you at ease in quite the same way as it did earlier. Em’s laughing too, and she looks gorgeous in the golden light. At least she’s put together in a way you’re so obviously not. Maybe you should have taken your mother’s well-meant advice when you were younger - dress to impress, for you never know who you’re going to meet. But you haven’t taken that advice, choosing to dress simply and comfortably. It works when you can’t wear any makeup when you work in a laboratory and when all of your nice clothes would be at risk of chemical spills at worst and covered by a lab coat at best. So you walk through life in a swirl of well-worn jeans, tee-shirts, yoga pants, tank tops, camisoles, sneakers and sandals. There are a few dressier items in your closet, but they’re so far in the back that you haven’t worn them in probably a year and a half. Em’s cute outfit and wavy, non-greasy hair probably feel like a breath of fresh air to him. The same goes for the timber of her voice and how she sounds so elegant.

If you didn't know any better (because you know Em, you do), you'd think that the words the two of them are sharing by the counter now are flirtier than settling up a bill. It doesn’t help the green, envious monster sitting on your shoulder, though. Nor does it help when you run to the restroom and take a look at yourself in the mirror. You look worse than you thought you did. Your face is wan and pale, the bags under your eyes have bags, and your hair is so greasy that it lays limp when you release it from your bun. Your lips are chapped, and fuck, how did you manage to drip coffee onto yourself?! You only drank one cup! What's left to show you that you've made a huge fool of yourself?

Your hands shake as you splash water on your face and put your hair back in its sad bun again. Just a little longer and you'll be home, wallowing in peace at yet another failed potential relationship. At least the water has brought a blush to your cheeks and cleaned the worst of the smudges off your glasses. Bradley probably has Em's phone number by now, right? It's probably best not to get your hopes up too high, else you find yourself falling from a prodigious height.

Instead, you're pleasantly surprised to see him still in the shop.

“Hey!” His face lights up when he sees you, and you're sure your earlier pep-talk about managing your expectations hasn’t worked at all. This is going to hurt. “So, I know talking to a stranger for hours at a coffee shop probably isn't the best first date. So would you maybe want to go on a real one sometime soon?”

“Y-you're serious?” He smiles and hands you his phone, unlocked.

“Put your number in there, Paper.” Your mind's not working at all as you type the ten digits in.

“Why me?”

His smile is warm and fond as he takes the phone back, types something and hits send. Your notification tone goes off soon after.

“It's not every day I run into a pretty girl listening to me reading a romance novel who doesn't fawn all over me once they realize who I am. It's been nice talking to you. I feel like you're the first person in a long time to see Bradley, not Rooster.”

He holds the door open for you, a hand finding its way to the small of your back as he walks you out to your car. He even opens the door for you, a chivalrous action which has your heart flip-flopping in your chest. “Baby doll?”

“Yeah?” He takes advantage of the height difference between you to tip your face up as he feathers a kiss across the apple of your cheek.

“It helps that your ass looks damn good in those yoga pants!”

You're laughing despite yourself as you drive away. Maybe audiobooks aren't as bad as you think? Or, well, at least their narrators aren't.

I DO NOT CONSENT TO HAVE MY WORK POSTED, TRANSLATED, OR PUBLISHED ON ANY SITES OTHER THAN HERE, ON WATTPAD, OR ON AO3 BY ME. IF YOU SEE MY WORKS ANYWHERE OTHER THAN HERE, ON WATTPAD, OR AO3, THEN THEY HAVE BEEN POSTED WITHOUT MY PERMISSION AND I WILL BE WORKING TO TAKE THEM DOWN.

Taglist:

@desert-fern @horseshoegirl @dakotakazansky @sarahsmi13s @teacupsandtopgun @footprintsinthesxnd @roosterforme @beyondthesefourwalls @mak-32 @thedroneranger @chaoticassidy @shanimallina87 @kmc1989

#star writes #top gun fanfic #top gun fanfiction #top gun maverick fanfic #top gun maverick fanfiction #bradley bradshaw x reader #rooster x reader #bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #top gun imagine #bradley bradshaw imagine #rooster imagine #bradley rooster bradshaw imagine #bookmark my heart

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spockandawe · 9 months

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Now. Here's the big project! I made a test notebook for once in my life, but I've never enjoyed making notebooks and I'm always chasing that sweet, sweet dopamine. So the test notebook was like... 90% in parallel with the actual book, just rehearsing each step real quick before I did it on the real thing. And what I did was a fresh binding of 'it's about the bones 👌' by @sunderedstar. I had a typeset file ready to go, I'm in the middle of relistening to the audiobooks, it was perfect! And then I zoned out and accidentally cut a whole cover's worth of leather and not just a spine and the whole project ESCALATED 🤣

First, the k118 binding went beautifully. I really do recommend it. It can be done with an oxford hollow to give you a breakaway spine, but I... didn't do that! I stuck to the old timey examples I've seen where it's a tightbacked style and, yeah, it still opens SO far, it's an absolute doll. The style is characterized by vellum strips on the spine used to attached the cover boards and give them the security and flexibility without added bulk. I got impatient trying to differentiate between PAPER vellum and ANIMAL vellum in search engines and just said screw it and went in with the paper vellum. I still have actual vellum getting shipped to me, but truly, the paper stuff worked amazingly. I'm not sure how durable it is, in terms of years of life, but if feels REAL good now. Also. Finally had a thematic excuse to use this beautiful lacquered paper.

I also remain very proud of my typesetting for this book. Warning that you can glean HtN and NtN spoilers if you read the text closely! But scope out that hand I subbed in for the emoji in the title, that's important.

Because now that I was committed to all this leather. Something I've been procrastinating on for MONTHS is learning how to properly tool leather. I have a set of brass stylus tools that ought to be up my alley! Freehand drawing was my first creative hobby of note! This interest dates back to like, fifth grade, and it was time to GO for it. So. I modified the ninth house skull to have some sick shades, made the IX on the forehead more scrawled and scratchy, and drew a skeleton hand over the art I used for the title page. I printed my lines and traced them through printer paper with unheated tools. This was extremely rad, but I couldn't stop there. The next day, I went back over my lines with heated tools, and the level of crisp was SO delightful. I'm still very new to this, still learning how these tools and the material even handle, but oh man. I am actively antsy to find the next project to do this for, this was SO much fun, I enjoyed it so much, and I love this book to pieces!

#crafts #bookbinding #k118

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thegrimreaperisanerd · 6 months

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hi :) binge read your de fic that you have posted on ao3 last night and really enjoyed all of it! excited to see any updates. was wondering if you have any rec for other fic youve read and enjoyed-- i am not god's bravest soldier and do not enjoy trudging through tags and was wondering if you had read anything yourself that you really enjoyed lolol

Hey, thanks so much!!! Sorry it's taken a couple days to answer this, I'm poor as shit and have two jobs now wah... capitilism...

I'm working on the next 46' chapter, It's about 70% complete and I generally let it sit for an evening once it's done then re-read it the next day to catch the vast majority of mistakes (I edit everything myself) so I'd say expect that in the coming days.

I have some thoughts! I... Have never been asked for fic recs before so I'm gonna list a bunch in no particular order that I enjoyed, and reasons why. I will note that I tend to enjoy meaty plot-based works over fluff, so that's what I'll be recommending. Anyway!

Paddling Out (THE REPEATER CORPSE CONUNDRUM) - @transhitman - So this is the first DE fic I read and it set the bar pretty fucking high. YOU'VE GOT: a very cool and insular setting (don't get me wrong I like fics where they travel around Revachol too, but there's something to be said for building a set and living in it for a while) YOU'VE GOT: extremely harrowing tension and pale-fuckery YOU'VE GOT: some genuinely beautiful, heartfelt moments (I don't want to spoil anything but "people don't need your permission to care about you" kinda undid me) YOU'VE ALSO GOT: Amazing art?! Always a bonus, I wish I could draw people lol

Have You Heard The News That You're Dead? - Wizardlover - Time Loop shenanigans hell yeah! Basic premise: Kim is *unable* to save Harry's life after he's shot at the tribunal, each time he dies he Reawakens in Martinaise on the first day and desperately has to try and find a way to either prevent the Tribunal entirely, or survive it. I think the major draw to this one is how well it's characterised and how well that lends to the major source of tension: trying to convince THE WORLD'S BIGGEST SKEPTIC that you *a man he 'has only just met'* is actually stuck in a time loop. Juicy shit.

The Case Of The Man Who Two-Thirds Wasn't There - @glisteningceruleaneyes - We got another case fic here, gang. This is one of those "they travel around Revachol" numbers I previously mentioned. A lot to love about this fic; the minor OCs are all loveable (or at least well-written, looking at you Mr. Bigot-All-Rounder), the elements of writing in the game's style (particularly use of Harry's 'to do' list that you find in the ledger, you don't see that as often!) are all fantastic. Also without spoiling too much I'm a sucker for hurt/ comfort :) I like when bad things happen to our specialist guy :) ALSO! alternating chapters, Kim vs Harry's perspectives contrast REALLY well! Just a super enjoyable read. - On that note I also wanna include a special mention: there's a podfic for this one and since I mentioned my two jobs, I've been listening to audiobooks at work (I'm a cleaner. It's very boring) and that was a fun change of pace!

The Emergent Causeway - hal_incandenza - Now you KNOW this one is good because it's the only *unfinished* fic I'm recommending. Again, We've got art! We've got a brand new (non-Revachol!) setting that still feels excellently Elysium! We got that excellent balance of humour and misery from the get go! EXCELLENT murder mystery so far, I am intrigued AND also there's a fucking puppy. Hell yeah. This one's from Kim's perspective and does a really good job of it, nothing like a man being begrudgingly sent on holiday and being somewhat relieved to have a corpse to deal with.

A Spilled Kaleidoscope - @spilledkaleidoscope - I'm actually recommending a series here. Real definition of "came for the art, stayed for the writing" I mostly have a soft spot because I got to watch a few "haha, what if-?" musing text posts become a series of written chapters and INCREDIBLE DRAWINGS HOLY SHIT. Like, you really just draw hands for fun, huh? This person made a pact with some sort of devil beasts to draw hands very good, at the bare minimum we can read their fiction.

Nothing To Lose But Our Chains - Lepak - I almost forgot this one and I honestly can't believe it because this is one of these ones that you need a cigarette afterwards. Good fucking god. This is probably the best fic I've ever read in terms of not shying away from the heavy themes that make Disco Elysium such a beautiful, moving game. It tackles a racism in many forms, particularly how people like Kim (in working for the RCM) and immigration laws do their part in upholding racist systems, despite the way it hurts him too. Of course, it's also excellently written with tense scenes and some real funny moments. A real good'un here.

The Catacomb Killer - SupposedToBeWriting - Give Harry more memory loss. Make him convinced he killed a kid. Make *Kim* convinced he killed a kid... Then the plot thickens. I won't lie I can't remember fuck all about this one because I was mostly drunk when I read it, but if it was good enough that I kept reading instead of smoking a spliff or something then it must have been excellent... I will re-read it when I have the time, lmao.

MURDER ON THE AIRWAVES - @randomisedmongoose - I'm just a really big fan of murder mysteries and gore. You show me somebody with brain matter pouring from their earholes and I'm like "yum yum, more of that please." I am a sucker for curious methods of murder and this one's good for that. Lots of trekking back and forth like in the game again. More ACAB - always good.

I did not mean to include this many...........................

Oh well. Here's my list, there are plenty of others I've enjoyed but these are just the ones that came to mind! Thanks again for reading my fic! Always makes me happy when people let me know they enjoy my writing :3

#hey if i tagged u in this and u don't want to be tagged then PLEASE lemme know and i'll remove u #likewise i dont know if everyone has tumblr so if u know somebody does ping this post their way and if they wanna be tagged let me know and #i'll do that #fic recs

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margowritesthings · 10 months

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THE MEANING OF THE SCAR

a RDR2 x Black Badge crossover

pairing: N/A for this chapter, will eventually be Arthur Morgan x reader word count: 2650 words warnings: spoilers for RDR2 ending, violence, Micah Bell, explicit language, major character death and subsequent resurrection, brief mentions of domestic violence YOU DONT NEED TO HAVE READ THE BLACK BADGE TO UNDERSTAND THIS SERIES, EVERYTHING IS EXPLAINED DURING THE STORY authors note: What's that, you say? You want a RDR x Black Badge crossover?? No??? WELL IM DOIN IT ANYWAY

The series that no one asked for tbh. If you haven't heard of the Black Badge, it's a wonderful series of books by Rhett C Bruno and Jamie Castle, where the audiobooks are narrated by Roger Clarke. This series puts Arthur in the shoes of the protagonist, who is doomed to hunt the supernatural to pay off his karmic debts. The prologue explains it a little better, so sit back and enjoy! There will be romance, there will be monsters, what more could you ask for?

BLACK BADGE ORIGNAL SERIES

PROLOGUE

I have seen so many incredible things.

Living on the land for as long as I have, you tend to. I’ve camped under the most breathtaking sunrises, that big orange orb scattering unimaginable colours over our poor souls as it creeps over the horizon. I've seen nature at its finest: baby deer learning to walk, wolves running together in tight packs not unlike us outlaws, even saw a little chick hatching once. Beautiful women from all around batting their long lashes at me, not even all of them because I was a prospective customer. I’ve been a lucky man, to have experienced so many sights.

Never did I think that the last thing I saw living on this Earth would be Micah Bell’s goddamn ugly mug.

The barrel of his gun was shaking in his tight grip, and I used the absolute last of my strength to keep my head up and look right down it.

“You’re not better than me, Morgan.”

Never claimed to be, but if I had more time, I might have argued it, the rat. But that was the thing… I didn’t have more time. I could tell, the simple act of breathing was becoming just too much. I might have gotten a few more days, if Micah hadn’t just knocked the seven bells of shit out of me and the last few days had been a little calmer, but such is life. Such is death, I should say.

After a wheezed cough was pushed out of me, I still managed to get one last jab in, as laboured and choked out as it was,

“Whatever you say, you fool.”

Everything hurt, and I could hear the clock ticking my final seconds out as Micah’s finger trembled on the trigger. He was mad, I could see the fury spreading across his face as he registered what I was choosing to do with my final words.

Maybe it was supposed to be the time for prayers, the time to have my life flash before my eyes while I count my regrets and mourn the things that will never happen, but there’d been enough of that ever since that doc told me my days were numbered. I hadn’t lived a good life, I wasn’t a good man, but I got some peace knowing my final hours were spent getting Marston and his family out safe, making sure Milton didn’t, and insulting the gang’s little pet rodent. If I had any regrets in that moment, they would only be that I didn’t manage any more permanent damage to Micah’s ugly ass mug before he got me. Actually, I might’ve wanted to die at dawn, to see one last sunrise, but mostly the Micah thing.

“Damn you…” he spat, the glow of the moon casting the most horrendous shadows from his twisted expression.

“Damn us both!”

And that was it.

A shot,

and it was all over.

No sunrise, no grand redemption in the last few minutes of my damned life…

Just me, the moon, and goddamned Micah Bell.

═══════☆═══════

I never expected I’d get into Heaven, but I never thought it’d be so goddamn dark down here in Hell.

I stirred as if waking up from a fitful sleep filled with nightmares involving Micah shooting me in the face, and even though my eyelids flew open, there was no light to speak of. There was a crushing weight on my chest, and a burning behind my right eye. What felt like dirt fell into my face with each little movement, and suddenly it all fit together, forming a terrifying reality of my predicament.

It wasn’t a dream. Micah fuckin’ Bell had shot me. Tuberculosis ran ragged through my veins and filled my lungs, I’d been captured, hung in an O’Driscoll camp and tortured for information, hell, I’d been shipped off to goddamn Guarma with nothing but the shirt of my back… and in the end the sorry sight to end my story was a rat with a revolver.

The dirt fell in my eyes relentlessly, so much so I had to close them again. It wasn’t like they were being much use anyway, what with me being buried alive and all. Moving my limbs was hard, but not impossible, I found, giving me hope that I wasn’t too far down in the ground. I never thought I’d hope for a shallow grave, but then again I couldn’t have predicted waking up in one either. None of it made much sense, but I reckoned it’d probably be best if I got back out into open air before figuring out why I couldn’t feel my toes, why breathing felt so strange and unnecessary, or how I’d survived a gunshot to the head.

I started with small movements, flexing my numbed fingers in and out until there was enough room to ball them into fists. I would have shouted for help, if I could, but I knew all I’ll get from it is a mouthful of dirt. I’d have to do this alone, it would seem.

The movement spread from fists to arms, the dirt starting to mould around me until it didn’t feel so crushing anymore, and I was soon clawing upwards. I dared to squint one eye open, finding small holes of light poked through the blanket of nothingness like stars. I felt triumphant when I reached upwards into open air, but it was short lived when I failed to feel the wind or the breeze or the sun or anything to let me know this wasn’t all some death dream.

I pressed on, scraping at the skies until big patches of the Earth fell apart around my body and I could pull myself out of my grave. The sun beat so brightly that I couldn’t help but continue to squint, trying to make out my surroundings. It was dawn, ironically. I always assumed Hell’s skies would hold a lot more fire in them, but the blue hues and yellow rays were anything but hellish. They were beautiful, a sight I was sure I’d never see again.

After my eyes adjusted, I made out the tombstone standing above my grave, a handcrafted wooden cross with my name scratched into the centre. Folk aren’t usually lucky enough (or unlucky enough, I hadn’t yet decided) to see their own graves, and yet here I was. Why? Was this truly Hell, looking over the sunrise while I was damned to sit by my own grave and wait for no-one to mourn me?

‘Blessed Are Those Who Mourn, For They Will Be Comforted’

It was my epitaph, carved into the circle surrounding my name. I hoped it was true. I didn’t know how long I’d been buried, but I didn’t want anyone sitting around crying over me. I hoped I’d done enough, in those last few hours, and that the ones I loved, whoever was left of them, anyway, made it out okay.

I pushed myself up out of the grave, dusting off the mud that clung to me and standing straight despite the complaints of my aching back. I looked over the hill, over what looked an awful lot like Ambarino.

“Beautiful, ain’t it? I tell you, that friend of yours picked a good spot. Shame you’ll get no rest here.”

I froze, my spine straightening on instinct as the voice behind me confirmed that I was in fact in Hell. Even after looking Death in the face and calling him a fool, it still took me a moment to turn and face my father.

I expected anger to course through my veins, for my fists to ball and fury to burn over my skin the first time I saw him after all these years, but it didn’t. I looked my Daddy straight in his cold, dead eyes, and nodded to him. He did the same.

“Pa?”

“Fraid so.”

I was almost too dumbfounded to realise what he was sitting on. Who he was sitting on, I should say. Boadicea stood as tall and as beautiful as that last day we spent together in Blackwater. The sight could have taken my breath away, if I had any.

I wanted to step closer, to pat my girl on the neck and feel to make sure she was really there, but I wasn’t ready to move just yet.

“What… What the hells goin’ on?”

Daddy dearest chuckled, probably at my ironic choice of wording, and Boadicea stomped a foot on the ground. Despite everything, all I wanted to do was to get Lyle Morgan off my horse, but there’d be time for it.

“You’re dead, son. Nasty shot to the head, though you put up a good fight.” He said it like he was recounting the most mundane story ever told, not breaking the news that his only son had died. I considered his words, finding a strange peace with them all.

“...This Hell?” It had to be, right? There’s no other way he could be here, not with the way he treated me and Ma. I dreaded to think what Boadicea could have done to deserve an afterlife with him, but it made more sense than both of us fools being let into the pearly gates upstairs everyone always goes on about.

Pa chuckled again, clearly finding my demise much more casual news than I, “To some, but not in the way you’re thinkin’ of it. I’ve got some bad news, boy.”

“Worse than my death?” It was annoying me, how elusive and blasé he was being about everything, dragging this out for longer than he needed while holding the cards right up close to his chest. He knew what was going on, and yet there he was, sitting on Boadicea like he owned whatever goddamn realm we were in. Surely this was Hell, having this conversation with the man who beat me into who I am today. Who I was, before karma caught up with me and shot me in the face.

“Depends on how much you were lookin’ forward to it.”

My teeth ground together as the frustration at his evasiveness built. He must’ve sensed it, as he dismounted Boadicea and patted her on the neck. It threw me more than it should, watching the man I’d left long behind me interacting with my beloved Boa.

He stood just as tall as the day I watched him hang, the only difference being a nasty scar that wound around his neck and made me dread to think what I might look like. It was like looking at a ghost. Well, I guess I was looking at a ghost.

“You’re still here, Arthur. On Earth. Seems you did just enough good there in the end that they didn’t know what to do with you. Too bad to make it to the upstairs, too good to burn in Hell… for now.”

“Earth? But… I’m… we’re-“

“Dead? Yeah. But you’re stuck here, doin’ their bidding.”

He was running his fingers over Boadicea’s mane, and she shook her head in response. She seemed like she wanted his hands off her as much as I did, but I had to find out what was going on first.

“Bidding? Who’s bidding? Can you just be straight with me for one damn minute-“

“Patience, boy.” He snapped, bringing out one of Boadicea’s signature annoyed huffs, “The White Throne’s bidding. You’re theirs now. You do as they say, or you end up in a far worse position than you’re in now.”

I felt like I needed to sit down, but unless I was going to climb back in that grave, there was nowhere to rest.

“I… I don’t understand.”

Lyle sighed, turning fully towards me and hooking his thumbs in his belt loops.

“The White Throne have chosen you to be a Black Badge, Arthur. You’re not alive, nor are you fully dead. You work for them until they decide they’re done with you, and then…”

“And then?”

“Well… I ain’t sure, truth be told, boy. I never got as far as you, I’m just here to pass the message on.”

None of it made any sense, and I had no idea who this White Throne was. Dad didn’t seem to have the answers, nor did he seem inclined to give them to me even if he did. It was then I noticed that my heart should be pounding out of my chest. Instead, it felt hollow, the anxiety of my situation bouncing around an empty can of nothing.

So this was really happening…

“They’ll call on you when they need you with this,” he turned, rummaging through Boadicea’s saddle bag and handing me a journal. It looked exactly like the one I gave to Marston just before I died, the one I collected my thoughts and sketches in, only when I flicked through the pages, they were all blank.

“Keep an eye on it, it’ll tell you what you need to do, who to look for, or where to go.”

“What am I, a goddamn undead bounty hunter?”

He laughed, a proper hearty laugh that would’ve made my skin crawl had I not been so occupied with the confusion of it all.

“You could say that. But you’re not just after anyone, they’ll send you off to the supernatural stuff. Vampires, werewolves, demons, that sort. You’ll get the hang of it.”

I was so stuck on the whole supernatural thing that I hardly noticed him step towards me, slapping a hand onto my shoulder. I froze, but not because my father had touched me for the first time in decades, but because I couldn’t feel a damn thing.

He must’ve seen the shock on my face, cause his brows pulled together in a pitiful look, “Ah, yeah… there’s some side effects to death, son. But I’m sure you’ll figure that one out.”

‘Side effects’ was a light way of putting it. I’d later find out that we unlucky few in the Black Badge have a fair few impediments. I can’t feel. Not the sun on my face, the wind in my hair, the touch of another, not even the burn of a good whiskey. I don’t feel pain, which can be helpful at times I guess. I can’t taste anything, either. It’s a unique punishment, to be stuck walking the earth but not really living, having no access to those simple pleasures in life like a stiff drink or the touch of a pretty lady. If I’d have known what was waiting for me at the end of all this, well… maybe I’d have made some different choices.

“It’s a lot to take in, I know.”

I glanced to my shoulder, finding Dad’s hand still there. He must’ve sensed my discomfort, removing his touch- or lack thereof- from me.

“You’ll get the hang of it, son.”

If I weren’t so preoccupied with my new lot in life (or death, I should say), now would have been the perfect time to confront the man who stood beside me. Ask him why he did what he did, get some answers for every question my teenage self tortured himself with while he wandered the streets for somewhere to stay for the night. But when I turned, he was gone, without a single trace to suggest he was ever there in the first place. Seems I’d gotten all the information out of him I was entitled to.

That left me and Boadicea, standing beside an empty grave I wasn’t sure anyone would have visited anyway.

I sighed, finally stepping towards her and patting her neck in that spot she always loved.

“Well girl, guess this is it for a while…”

I looked down to the journal in my hand, just in time to see inky black writing appear on the page as if bleeding through the realms.

‘Welcome to the Black Badge, Arthur Morgan.’

#arthur morgan #rdr2 #arthur morgan imagine #arthur morgan rdr2 #rdr2 fanfic #rdr2 fanfiction #red dead redepmtion 2 #black badge #roger clarke #tmots

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she-posts-nerdy-stuff · 3 months

Text

Six of Crows Fan-Written Script

Okay so I haven’t done a great job up until this point of actually separating this into clear scenes so I’ve gone through and corrected that and part 4 is the very end of scene 3, all of scene 4, and the start of scene 5. I’m wishing that I’d put better thought into this from the start so I could’ve posted a scene at the time but unfortunately I didn’t have enough foresight for that so I guess we’ll just have to see how it goes and hopefully at least by episode two I’ll have a more sensible structure going on

As usual: Be warned I've taken a little artisitc licence (eg inserting a reference to my personal Anya headcanon in the opening part) but most of this is direct quotes/takes on direct quotes - and also I've never written a script before so my formatting is my own made up method I hope it makes sense. I’ve had to make some strides away from the book in order to match Show!canon but I’m trying to remain as true as possible. Thanks so much for reading and I hope you enjoy! ❤️

Recap: The last part ended with Kaz and Inej having a conversation after leaving the exchange, with Inej leaving after she said “Men mock the gods until they need them, Kaz”

Also: sorry if there are spelling mistakes in names I’m working mostly from audiobooks because neither of my copies of the books are with me right now

Episode One - Part 4

[KAZ shakes his head, then keeps walking. After a moment he raises his head again, aware he once more isn’t alone. He glances around him briefly, then cuts down a dark alleyway alongside a canal. The scene suddenly darkens as there are no street lamps along this new road, the water of the canal is murky and the yellow reflection of the moon can be seen broken across its surface in between small boats bumping against their moorings as they bob with the movement of the water. KAZ seems to relax once more. A shadowed figure appears ahead of him]

KAZ: What business?

[The figure lunges towards KAZ. He swings his cane towards the attacker and the camera moves in close to the moment that should have been contact - the cane passes straight through empty space that a moment ago was the attacker’s legs, and KAZ stumbles forwards as his momentum pushes him. He rights himself and looks up to discover he’s face-to-face with the attacker. The attacker punches KAZ in the jaw and the camera follows his movement as he falls back then swings his cane around again - only to empty space. The cane hits the wall and then is torn from KAZ’s hands. The camera movements are choppy and confusing, remaining focused on KAZ and showing little of the attacker - we essentially see what KAZ sees: a ghost. A figure steps through the wall - appears as mist and then slowly forms itself into a silhouette wearing a hooded cloak, only the edge of the figure’s face visible in the low light - and KAZ stumbles backwards, terror written across his face. The camera moves close on KAZ’s face as he panics, turning in every direction until a needle is seen being inserted into the side of his neck. His eyes roll, then close, and he collapses out of frame as the screen fades to black]

SCENE FOUR

[THE CROW CLUB. The club is busy; there are patrons at the bar, players at every table, people shouting and jeering. The camera follows the hand of a dealer spinning Makker’s wheel; players shout their joys and sorrows as it lands, completely oblivious to INEJ slipping past them. The club’s patrons are all brightly coloured, a few in the crowd even wear the masks of the Komedie Brute though that’s less common here than on the other Stave, but INEJ is the opposite. The camera watches her from above, moving silently and unimpeded through the crowd, she is an inkblot crossing the bright tapestry. When she stops at a card table the camera moves down through the scene to level with her, and turns to Jesper and two Ravkan tourists sitting at the table. The dealer at the table is ROJAKKE, moving quickly and impressively as he sets up the hand. JESPER is glad to see INEJ. It’s fair to assume she’s spoken to him since her return to the city and he was unfazed by her appearance at the Exchange tonight, but he feels a distance between them that he desperately wants to close. As she approaches, he smiles up at her over his shoulder and references his cards]

JESPER: What do you think?

INEJ: You know exactly what I think

[JESPER looks away. He was trying to emulate the closeness he feels they’ve lost and now fears he had inadvertently made things worse. INEJ turns to ROJAKKE as he finishes handing the final cards of the hand to the tourists]

INEJ: Rojakke, I need a private word - walk with me?

[He frowns but nods, excusing himself from the table and following INEJ towards the private gambling parlours at the back of the club. JESPER glances over his shoulder at them, then shrugs and places two cards onto the table. The tourists play their hands and JESPER grins triumphantly, leaning in to take his winnings when he is suddenly interrupted by ROJAKKE yelling as he marches back into frame - INEJ hurrying after him]

ROJAKKE: It’s not fair - I ain’t no cheat!

[JESPER gets to his feet and the camera follows his steps across the room towards INEJ and ROJAKKE]

INEJ, much quieter: Take it up with Kaz

JESPER: And keep your voice down, you’ll scare off the pigeons. There’s no fights on the Crow Club floor, you know that

[ROJAKKE sneers]

ROJAKKE: Where even is Brekker?

INEJ: I don’t know

[There is genuine concern in INEJ’s tone and she glances at the clock on the wall behind her as she speaks - KAZ has already been gone longer than expected]

ROJAKKE: You always know everything about everything. Isn’t that what Dirtyhands pays you for?

JESPER, murmuring: Not anymore

[INEJ silences him with a look]

INEJ: I don’t know where Kaz is and I don’t know when he’s getting back, but I do know that you won’t want to be here when he does

ROJAKKE: Give me my cheque. I’m owed for my last shift.

INEJ: Brekker doesn’t owe you anything

ROJAKKE: Can’t even face me himself - sent a little girl to gimme the boot. Maybe I’ll just shake a few coins out of you

[ROJAKKE reaches out towards her but he’s slow and has clearly been drinking. INEJ dodges him easily and the camera catches her slipping her fingers into a pair of brass knuckles as she moves. JESPER steps forwards but INEJ shakes her head, then turns and punches ROJAKKE in the face. Use the movement to transition into Kaz’s head movement in the opening of the next scene]

SCENE FIVE

[HOEDE’S OFFICE. Use the sudden movement of ROJAKKE’s head when INEJ punches him to transition into the sudden movement of KAZ’s head at the opening of this scene as a hood is pulled off him. KAZ is tied to a chair in a plush office; mahogany panelled walls with decorative carved shapes, including waves and the three flying fishes of Kerch, grand bookshelves, and an oil painting of a woman with a book open on her lap and a lamb at her feet (with a small but notable signature in the corner says ‘DeKappel’ and possibly a plate on the frame as well to prove its authenticity) are notable features of the set. At first the camera remains focused entirely on KAZ so we cannot see who he is with; someone behind him has removed the hood but they aren’t entirely in frame. KAZ has clearly taken an injury from the fight and there is blood on his face; whatever he was injected with has had him knocked out for an unclear amount of time and he is struggling to right himself. The camera pans back slowly to reveal a MEDIK crouched in front of KAZ, moving forwards to wave a small linen pouch (wolf salts) beneath KAZ’s nose. KAZ shoves back from him as far as his restraints will allow, attempting to kick at the MEDIK but unable to move his legs]

KAZ: Get away from me

[The MEDIK looks at KAZ with distaste as he slips the wolf salts into a small leather container and returns them to his bag. KAZ looks around him with veiled confusion; he expected to wake up in the den of a rival gang but instead is in the plush surroundings of a merchant’s house. The camera moves slowly around the room to introduce us to the scene just as Kaz is: he notes the armed members of the stadwatch at the door, the act that the painting is a genuine DeKappel, and as the camera rotates a broad hardwood desk is revealed, behind which VAN ECK is seated. VAN ECK appears more than simply prosperous. He’s in his forties, has a gaunt air about his face, and has a distinctly receding hairline. His outfit is noticeably similar to KAZ’s and distinctly different from the common trappings that have been seen in the Barrel. He leans on the desk studying KAZ, trying to hide his eagerness and not doing a particularly good job of it]

KAZ: What business?

[VAN ECK appears to be ignoring KAZ. He nods at the MEDIK]

VAN ECK: You may go. Please send me you bill - and I would of course appreciate your discretion

[MEDIK exits. VAN ECK stands and collects a sheath of papers from the desk and the camera cuts close to focus on the gold laurel leaves that make up the fob of his pocket watch and the large, perfect ruby on his tie pin]

KAZ: Van Eck

[It is clear he would have preferred to say something quite different. VAN ECK nods]

VAN ECK: You know me, then

KAZ: I know of you - the Red Laurel crest. You’re one of those merch crusaders always trying to clean up the Barrel

VAN ECK: I try to find men honest work

[KAZ laughs]

KAZ: What’s the difference between wagering at the Crow Club and speculating on the floor of the exchange?

VAN ECK: One is theft and the other is commerce

KAZ: When a man loses his money, he may have trouble telling them apart.

VAN ECK: The Barrel is a den of filth, vice, violence-

KAZ: How many of the ships you send sailing from the Ketterdam harbours never return?

VAN ECK: That doesn’t-

KAZ: One in five, Van Eck. One out of every five vessels you send seeking your fortune sinks to the bottom of the sea, crashes on the rocks, falls prey to pirates. One out of five crews dead, their bodies lost to foreign waters, food for deep sea fishes. Let’s not speak of violence

[VAN ECK is clearly affronted - and clearly trying to hide it]

VAN ECK: I won’t argue ethics with a strippling from the Barrel

[The camera cuts to KAZ’s fingers feeling as far along his chains as he can, subtly adjusting the position of his wrists]

KAZ: Well, if you didn’t bring me here to philosophise: What business?

VAN ECK: I have a proposition for you - or rather, the council does

[KAZ veils his surprise]

KAZ: And does the Merchant Council begin all negotiations with a beating?

VAN ECK: Consider it a warning - and a demonstration

[KAZ frowns, thinking of the way the figure appeared and disappeared like a ghost. He is trying to make himself stop thinking of ghosts]

KAZ: What possible use would the Merchant Council have for me?

[VAN ECK studies the papers in front of him, reading and looking over the top of the page at KAZ as he speaks]

VAN ECK: You were first arrested at ten

KAZ: Everyone remembers his first time

VAN ECK: Twice again that year, twice again at eleven. You were picked up at a gambling hall a few years ago and there was a warrant for your arrest six months ago - but you were found to be incorrectly charged, and haven’t served any time since you were fourteen?

[KAZ grins, shrugging]

KAZ: I cleaned up. Found honest work. Live a life of industry and prayer

VAN ECK: Don’t blaspheme

[VAN ECK’s eyes flash briefly with anger and KAZ notes it - he is keeping track of everything he knows about VAN ECK so far. He’s prosperous, pious, a widow recently remarried to a bride a similar age to KAZ, and there’s a mystery surrounding his son. VAN ECK continues to flick through the papers. As the conversation continues the camera moves between three positions: focus on KAZ, focus on VAN ECK, and a side view showing both their profiles backlit by the window]

VAN ECK: You run book on prize fights, horses, and your own games of chance. You were floor boss at the Crow Club for two years-

KAZ: Still am.

[VAN ECK frowns, looking between KAZ and the papers]

KAZ: We’ve reopened

VAN ECK, continuing as though Kaz never spoke: You’re the youngest to ever run a betting shop and you doubled its profits in that time. You’re a blackmailer -

KAZ: I broker information

VAN ECK: A con artist

KAZ: I create opportunity

VAN ECK: A bawd, and a murderer

KAZ: I don’t run whores - and I kill for a cause

VAN ECK, distastefully: And what cause is that?

KAZ: Same as yours merch: Profit

VAN ECK: How do you get your information, mister Brekker?

KAZ: You might say I’m a lockpick

VAN ECK: You must be a very gifted one

KAZ: I am indeed. You see, every man is a safe, a vault of secrets and longings. Now there are those who takes the brute’s way, but I prefer a gentler approach: the right pressure applied at the right moment, in the right place. It’s a delicate art

VAN ECK: Do you always speak in metaphors, mister Brekker?

[KAZ smiles widely]

KAZ: It’s not a metaphor

[KAZ jumps up from the chair and the chains clatter to the ground behind him. He leaps across the room towards the desk, snatching a letter opener with one hand and grabbing VAN ECK’s shirt with the other. He presses the blade against VAN ECK’s throat. KAZ is noticeably slower than usual, groggy from the injection and with no access to his cane, but he can still easily get the better of VAN ECK and the stadwatch officers in the room- and he is immediately more comfortable now he’s holding a weapon. The guards turn to him with weapons raised, a mixture of guns and swords]

KAZ: I don’t think I need to waste breath on threats. Tell me how to get to the door or I’m taking you through the window with me

VAN ECK: I think I can change your mind

KAZ: I don’t care who you are, or how big that ruby is, you don’t take me away from my own streets and you don’t try to make a deal with me when I’m in chains.

VAN ECK, calling towards the door: Mika

[A figure walks through the wall of the office in the same format of dissipating and reforming from mist as the figure in scene three and becomes a young boy, MIKA, in a slightly faded Tidemaker’s Kefta with a red laurel crest pinned to the lapel. He is clearly ill; his cheeks are hollow, there are large dark circles beneath his eyes, and his face is paled. KAZ panics - he thinks he’s hallucinating from some kind of drug Van Eck has given him]

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archiveofkloss · 2 months

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The Gentle Workout Karlie Kloss Swears By by Olivia Rose Rushing

The model, entrepreneur, and mother of two shares her go-to wellness rituals.

At just 31, Karlie Kloss has already lived many lives.

When she was 21, the Missouri native was a Victoria’s Secret Angel. In 2015, she founded Kode With Klossy, a company that creates opportunities for young women in tech. Flash forward to today, and the mother of two has learned a lot about dealing with change.

“With life as a mother, you don’t lose who you are — you evolve,” Kloss tells Bustle. “My fashion career is still a core part of who I am, but I’m also an entrepreneur and I just had a second baby.” While she still prioritizes aspects of her wellness routine, sometimes things slip.

“If something’s got to give, it might be a few extra steps in my skin care routine, but I’m going to make sure that I make time to break a sweat or even just go for a walk and get fresh air,” she says.

In between modeling gigs, educating the next generation of intellectuals with her company, and annual invites to the Met Gala, Kloss is taking on a partnership with Coterie, a subscription-based diaper service that aims to take one thing off a parent’s plate.

Here, Kloss talks all things motherhood, the wellness rituals she swears by, and finding moments of self-care amid her busy schedule.

What has changed since baby number two?

Not to be cliché, but everything — in the most beautiful ways. That's really what the Coterie campaign is all about — the changes. I'm looking in the mirror and I have mascara left over from last night, I don't even think I've run a brush through my hair today. My self-care routine has definitely gotten more efficient, and maybe a little neglected, but that's OK. I'm enjoying this phase of life, which has made me so much better in a lot of ways. As a businesswoman, I've become more efficient and I make decisions faster, and I think a lot of working moms can relate to that. It's impossible to even anticipate what is about to happen, but it's the most beautiful changes that force you to grow.

What’s your skin care routine like these days?

I just take better care of my skin so I don't have to wear as much makeup. I've found that's been a better investment of my time, so I’m diligent at the end of the day about taking off makeup, cleansing, toning, and using a serum and a retinol.

Are there any non-negotiables that you always make time for throughout the day?

I'd say fitness. I exercise for my mental health more than my physical health. I find that's such a core part of my mental well-being. I’m not as focused on high-impact or intensity — I’ve developed a more gentle exercise regimen post-baby number two, so I’ve done a lot of Pilates lately, which I find helps me show up better in every other aspect of my life.

What’s on your workout playlist?

Anything Beyoncé.

What’s the most out-there wellness treatment you’ve ever tried?

There's this guy who is called The Beauty Sandwich who has some sort of ultrasound technology he uses for facials. I've done his treatments before the Met Gala or a big red carpet, and it does some magical thing to the muscles under your face, your jaw, your neckline — it just pulls and tightens in some mysterious, magical way.

Coffee or tea?

Iced coffee always. There's snow on the ground here in New York and I just went out to get an iced coffee this morning.

Physical book or Kindle?

I love an audiobook, actually. Especially now, I always have my hands full or I'm in transit, so I love to have headphones in and listen to an audiobook.

Do you prefer walking the runway or photo shoots?

I do love the energy of walking in a runway show — it's like a live performance, and there's something about that adrenaline rush that never gets old.

What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?

My dad always used to say to my sisters and me, "No matter what it is that you do, you should always try to be the best you can be at it." Both my parents instilled this idea of pursuing your passions and doing it with excellence. That always stuck with me.

find the interview here

#karlie kloss #03012024 #interview

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thelivingautomaton · 7 months

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so lately i've been curing my brainrot by listening to audiobooks while i crochet, the result being that i have gotten really, really into the wheel of time (which i've previously bounced off of like, 3 separate times) and also been tweeting about it. anyway i have finished the first book and simply must scream into the void about it

jesus, okay, where do i even begin. let's talk about characters

so i KNEW that mat was gonna be The Character Of All Time going right in, i am self-aware enough about what kinds of blorbos i enjoy (read: cocky roguish guy who is actually a sopping wet cat of a man and uses snark to obscure deep-seated angst and/or doubt in himself, his identity, and his goodness). and i do have an affection for mat at this point

although ngl it kind of totally went over my head when i last tried to read these books that he is also? kind of a dick this early on? though to be fair he was having his soul eaten by an evil dagger for like, two-thirds of the book

that being said. what i did NOT expect was for the dark horse surprise contenders for Character Of All Time to be nynaeve and rand

nynaeve is literally the funniest, pettiest bitch ever and i love her SO MUCH. literally what if you were a preternaturally gifted healer and given a position of authority at a very young age so you had a complex about it, but that complex manifests itself as a bullheaded stubborn drive to Take Care Of Your People, and you are ready to throw hands with every magic lady Jedi on the way because you are fueled by Pure Unadulterated Spite at all times

every time she'd try to start a catty slap fight with moiraine and moiraine would just, like, sip her tea unbothered? now THAT'S comedy

sidenote, dear lord do these characters drink a lot of tea. do they have coffee in this nebula. do they have new world crops. i feel like someone must have mentioned potatoes. where was i

oh my god, rand. RAND. literally WHAT IF you were a farmboy from the ass-end of nowhere and you get pulled into this fantastical adventure like a hero from legend, but you spend 700 pages having all of your assumptions about the world and yourself systemically questioned and tested and broken down. and the whole time you're holding onto the hope of going home and going back to the way things were, until you experience the crushing weight of the Hero's Journey and the fact that you can never really go home (read: go back to the simple life and the way things used to be) ever again

EXCEPT!!! THAT THERE IS ALSO WONDER AND EXCITEMENT AND CURIOSITY TOO!!! like, obviously i loved all the times that rand and the other farm kids are agog seeing different parts of the world (especially the cities -- dude, i LOVE the setup for caemlyn) but literally one of my favorite scenes was when rand is on the spray sitting at the top of the mast and he just starts laughing aloud for the freedom and joy of it all. the journey will be long and terrible and arduous but it's so important to show that there are bright moments on the way too. i'm going to puke

also there's a few moments between rand and the dark one (ba'alzamon? bro idk how anything is spelled) that were so *chef's kiss*, like rand telling him "i belong to myself" or in their big fight when he screams that he'll never be a hound for the dark one. more generally i love the emphasis placed on the importance and power of people taking a stand, even if they know it's futile. ESPECIALLY if they know it's futile. (there was this line from moiraine like "the wheel weaves as the wheel wills, but i refuse to believe it weaves an end to all hope". waugh)

also i know the reveal that rand can channel was telegraphed from a mile away but i ain't even mad about it because i feel like the setup was done so nicely. you get a scene of moiraine explaining to nynaeve about how channeling feels the first time you do it (i.e. you have the greatest need you've ever known, then a week later your body has a delayed reaction that feels like a weird flu), you get rand and mat escaping whitebridge via improbable lightning strikes, then you get rand coming down with a weird flu. like, idk, i like it when creators set up dominoes and i as a reader can SEE the dominoes getting set up and i get to go like, hoohoohoo, can't wait for those to get knocked down!

unsurprisingly since rand and nynaeve are my two favs i also am enamored with their dynamic. maybe it's because you're in rand's head the most in this book, and so it's the closest you as a reader are to seeing a straightforward platonic relationship between a male and female character? but okay like, listen. nynaeve is the FIRST PERSON (maybe the only person rn??) rand shares his fears with re: tam not being his dad and him not knowing who he is. and nynaeve immediately reassures him that it doesn't matter, she saw tam and kari with him and she KNOWS they loved him like any father and mother

or like, the scene when rand overhears lan and nynaeve having their whole Dramatic Star-Crossed Romance (which is like, cool, but also, can't wait for lan to get over his TTRPG Tragic Backstory [affectionate] and kiss her already), and the chapter ends with a line like "Rand closed his eyes. He did not think the Wisdom would like it if he saw her cry." good GOD!

how old are these kids supposed to be anyway. like i know nynaeve is older by a few years and she's...24? so are the rest 18-20ish? oh my god you guys, they're KIDS

i'm sure i will have more thoughts about the other characters as these books progress and shit continues to pop off and Get Funky (especially relevant vis a vis perrin going full wolf mode and egwene learning how to be an aes sedai). also i love how often it's repeated that people from the two rivers are The Most Stubborn People Alive, and how rand holds onto that as part of his identity (re: envisioning hardy two rivers soil)

now let us talk about the world because OH MY GOD

one of the things that definitely stuck with me was the secret hidden lore re: "this is actually post-post-post apocalyptic earth", cf. thom telling stories about "lenn flying to the skies in an eagle made of fire" and "salya walking among the stars", because it is so fucking insane as a concept and jordan does it REALLY WELL, in the sense that any references to "our" earth are so oblique and indirect that they're barely comprehensible, which is as it should be if these books take place a whole two ages later

but it's also such a perfect excuse/reason to deliberately echo and make homage to myths and stories that we as readers are familiar with, the most obvious being the legend of artur hawkwing (and also half of our main cast having arthurian-esque names). something something george lucas saying that it's like poetry, it rhymes

the part that really dropped me flat on my ass though was when perrin and egwene and elyas are leaving the tinkers and elyas LITERALLY recites anglican catechism at them ("as it once was, so shall it ever be, world without end"), reader i screamed

that being said. i do kind of wish there was more Weird Religion Bullshit. i mean it makes sense that the cosmology and people's theological beliefs are pretty universal (given that it's a Canonical Big Deal Historical Event that the embodiment of evil punched a hole in reality and made magic evil and fucked up for men forever), but like. where is the variety! where is the spice! where are the religious freaks! give me religious freaks!!!

however this is ameliorated by the fantastic variety in cultures/societies/stories, and also the overarching theme of "the world has moved on from what it once was". like, everything with loial (also strong contender for Supporting Character Of All Time) talking about the groves and how different the world is from what he'd read about in the stedding! the entire scene with the green man (which still makes me feel completely fucking insane, just btw)! perrin and egwene at the ruined statue of artur hawkwing! moiraine telling the people of emond's field about manetheren! WHEWWWWWWWWWW

like, it really does give you this sense of history and loss. but also i hope that as the books go on it gets more into, like, "okay, the world has moved on and nothing will ever be as it once was. so what are we going to do with the world we have? how are we going to keep it safe and let it grow?"

sidenote: the tragedy of listening to the audiobooks is that i can't flip back to look at the map or the glossary if i start getting a little lost 😭 help i just want to get everything Right in my head

i also feel like jordan does a fantastic job of like...getting the reader further and further into the more fantastical or impactful elements of the world step by careful step and pacing out how he escalates the characters' importance to the world. does this make any sense.

like, baerlon -> whitebridge -> caemlyn is a steady stepwise escalation in Experiencing A City. and the one-two-three combo of loial explaining ta'veren to rand + rand overhearing a farmer gossip about queen morgase and her family + the repeated references to seeing the false dragon in caemlyn all leads perfectly into rand falling into the garden and the entire chapter with elayne and gawyn and morgase. (side note: this chapter was fucking incredible, good god i am obsessed with royal political bullshit.) OR having all these moments of the characters with moiraine to establish her nature, then providing an immediate contrast with the introduction of elaida as the "other" aes sedai. DOES THIS MAKE ANY SENSE AT ALL. it's dominoes, baby

okay i have a few other miscellaneous thoughts

i fucking love how unapologetically trope-y these books are. it is so crunchy. not just vis a vis the hero's journey, but also, like, all the repeated motifs? spooky symbolic dream sequences? excerpts from in-universe writings and poetry? Foreshadowing Via Fortune-Telling? chef's kiss

also, dude, i love that robert jordan really dropped all of the fucking symbols for the next who knows how many books into three paragraphs via min. he knew the girlies would go crazy for this. AND HE WAS RIGHT

same goes for the whole concept of ta'veren, like i know on the surface it's kind of a goofy concept that you are Assigned Main Character At Birth by the wheel/the pattern, but also like. this man knew people on tumblr would be obsessing over characters doomed/haunted by narratives 30 years after these books were published. his third eye was OPEN

in a bizarre way so much of the story elements and pacing feels like a d&d campaign. mat is the rogue who picks up stuff he really shouldn't. perrin is a barbarian that accidentally took a level in druid. lan is the dm's npc blorbo with the intricately detailed tragic backstory that gets dumped on the players all at once (this is affectionate i swear). do you see what i'm saying

hi i love these books a lot already and i can't wait for them to get even more insane. thanks 4 ur time

#wheel of time #the wheel of time #wot book spoilers #but not really cos this is all the first book. i just don't know what other tags to add and i want this post to Find Its People #also i'm just now realizing how appropriate it is that i crochet while listening to these books #because. you know. the wheel weaves and whatnot

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illmamnim · 1 year

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5 reasons you should read All That's Left In The World By Erik J. Brown

1. Good queer representation

Without giving much away, the development of relationship and character in the book is well built and darling. As someone who doesn't invest in romance as much, I very much still enjoyed seeing the two characters come to terms with their emotions and grow together. It's a found family as much as it is a romance.

2. Character/World balance at it's finest

I don't want to drag other books, and I certainly won't point them out, but I've seen quite a few YA stories that avoid heavy personal events for the sakes of keeping things in the realm of a "light hearted read", and it always takes away from the gravity of the story. All That's Left In The World is a post apocalyptic romantic story that doesn't favour one or the other. There's harmony in both the truma the characters been through and the prose that keeps it relatable, engaging, and touching. Giving us adorable banter all the while never taking away from the fact that the world truly did end, and actions have serious consequences.

I could go on because I truly love their characterization but we have more points to make.

3. Excellent world building (yes, it is different from reason 2)

This is an American story, full of American references, places, beliefs and more. However, as a non American, no nod or reference disturbed my immersion or felt out of place. The references and jokes aren't put just to fill up space, they genuinely deliver a small level of exposition and a look into who the characters were before the start of the story. As a non American, I can still get a sense of how the world each of them lived in shaped them to who they were when they met.

4. Morality in a changing world

Like I said, the world building is well thought out, and the question of right and wrong is a fundamental part of our heros' journey. The world has ended, people are left to fend for themselves, how do you know what's morally wrong when you're counting down each can of mushrooms? How do you change years of learning to be a good person because suddenly it's you against the world?

Morality, politics and identity are all reoccurring thoughts that our heros' deal with, on their own and together, and try to make the right choices when so much of the world is wrong.

5. Not a coming of age story (and why it works)

Coming of age are some of my favourite stories, both because I relate to them as well as it being a fun light read. But this story, in a sense, tricked me into thinking it is a coming of age, when it deals a little differently. The characters don't grow up because they're learning things about life, but rather are forced to grow because... Well, the world ended. Suddenly having to take care of themselves, their mistakes aren't stepping stones, they are a literal matter of life and death (but no pressure).

If they break out of their shell it's because they need to survive. If they have a hard choise to make- it can but their lives on the line. They still grow and learn about themselves, still question who they are, but the story doesn't conclud with their identity, because the goal isn't who they are- it's others.

Again, I could go on, because this is the tip of the iceberg for me spreading the ATLITW propaganda, but I'll leave you with this for now.

And, hey, maybe in the future I'll do a small analysis with actual spoilers, who knows.

(bonus reason: the Audiobook is REALLY good!)

#tinstuff #all that's left in the world #atlitw #erik j brown #analysis #book rec #book reccomendation #long post #bookblr #idk what else to tag this but PLEASE I love this book so much I've listened/read it 4 times no joke #listened 3 times and then my friend bought me the physical copy :3

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guardian-angle22 · 7 months

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Nine ten books

thank you to @rmd-writes who tagged me (ages ago) in this... not sure you knew what you were going to unleash when you did that but here we are. 😅

I think the prompt for this is just list nine favorite books, but because I can't be normal about books and my taurus energy is strong today... I'm breaking up these book recs into categories, adding visuals, and also adding a tenth book to make it an even number. Cheers!

Books #1 & #2 (Nonfiction)

Ace by Angela Chen - Hello! Your friendly neighborhood asexual over here recommending that everybody read this book! It's such a good exploration of what it's like to navigate the world as an ace person and also the vast spectrum involved within asexuality.

Yoke by Jessamyn Stanley - Even if you've never done a single yoga pose in your life, I think you can gain something from this book. It's not a how-to yoga guide, but instead essays about her relationship to yoga, cultural appropriation within the community, fatness, colonization, capitalism, etc. It's fantastic and funny!

Books #3 & #4 (Excellent on Audio)

Six Stories by Matt Wesolowski - This fiction book (and the following books in the series) follows an investigative journalist who has a true crime podcast. The audiobook is full cast and it feels like you're following along to an actual podcast, but one you know you'll get a conclusion to. Highly recommend all of the books in this series on audio if you enjoy mystery/thrillers.

Where to Begin by Cleo Wade - The author narrates the audio version of this and her voice is like a balm to the soul. It feels a little bit like she’s a counselor guiding you through a thoughtful meditation. It’s short but it packs a punch.

Books #5 & #6 (Seasonally Appropriate)

Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas - This is a YA book following a young trans boy, Yadiel, who wants to prove to his family that he's truly a brujo and attempts to summon the ghost of a murdered family member. Except he accidentally summons a classmate who has no idea how he died. Adventure and mystery ensues!

The Changeling by Victor Lavalle - I've always loved the folklore surrounding changelings, but Lavalle's writing just takes this to another level. This is set in NYC and he somehow managed to make the city feel like a character in itself. Super chilling, creepy read.

Books #7 & 8 (Graphic Novels)

I Hate Fairyland by Skottie Young - This is a 4 volume series about a little girl named Gertrude who is whisked away to Fairyland, where she's told she must go on a quest to find the key to unlock the door back to her world. Turns out she sucks at quests and 30 years pass and she still hasn't found the key. Now she's stuck in the body of a six year old and just murders everything she comes across. The contrast of bright, happy colors vs. the murderous, jaded Gertrude is hilarious and wonderful.

The Magic Fish by Trung Le Nguyen - This is a standalone graphic novel following Tien, the son of Vietnamese immigrants, as he navigates how to come out to his parents. The art in this is wonderful and the use of color to define when we're in the past, the present, or a fairy tale was done so beautifully. A gorgeous read!

Books #9 & #10 (Books from Favorite Authors I Will Read Anything From)

A Psalm for the Wild Built by Becky Chambers - This book/series follows a tea monk who encounters a robot looking for the answer to the question, "what do people need?" It's cozy and comforting. I've read every Becky Chambers book published and will continue to do so. The way she weaves hope into everything she writes is phenomenal.

The Raven Boys by Maggie Steifvater - This series owns my soul. I don't even know how to pitch this other than it has a magical forest, a found family, the slowest of slow burn queer love, and Maggie Steifvater's atmospheric writing. Maggie is another author that I will read pretty much anything from (the werewolves weren't my cup of tea so I can't claim to have read all her books).

OPEN TAG to anyone who wants to list off some book recs/fave books. Tag me so I can get some new recs!! also no pressure tagging: @lemonlyman-dotcom @mikibwrites @alrightbuckaroo @reasonandfaithinharmony

#tag game #book recs #book recommendations #i cannot be normal about books dont ask that of me #guardian reads (sometimes)

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bookaddict24-7 · 3 months

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REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!

EVERY WEEK I WILL POST VARIOUS REVIEWS I’VE WRITTEN SO FAR IN 2024. YOU CAN CHECK OUT MY GOODREADS FOR MORE UP-TO-DATE REVIEWS HERE.

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24. Throne of Glass by Sarah J. Maas--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Re-read January 2024

I've been wanting to re-read this series for a while because I never finished it. I remember really enjoying this first book in the series because of the competition aspect of it and I'd say I still enjoyed that!

I also see the foreshadowing for the MC's ability to attract all of the men in her life LOL. While I might not have enjoyed it as much as the first time, I still enjoyed it for the most part. There were a lot of things I forgot about and was delighted to be reminded of. The MC is a badass, but her constant "I could kill him with two moves" comments at the beginning had me rolling my eyes a few times.

Even though I know book two will break my heart again, I can't wait to pick it up. Also, SO MANY clues in this one about her identity that I missed the first time around. Definitely one of those books that is worth reading more than once just to catch all of the little pieces of the overall puzzle.

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25. Mixed Signals by B.K. Borison--⭐️⭐️⭐️

I have a bit of a gripe with this author. While I like a good chunk of the books she writes, the third act breakups are so infuriating. They take away all of those happy feelings that were building up throughout the book because the drama and miscommunication for the third acts are freaking ridiculous.

I was listening to this book last night when it happened--the inevitable "I'm afraid and a coward and let me let you stew in this miscommunication so that it somehow makes sense for me to break up with you because I'm so scared." Listen, as someone who has anxiety and has relegated herself to singledom because I don't want to deal with the messy emotions, I UNDERSTAND. It's freaking scary. BUT. But for the love of god, there are better ways around this. This manufactured and forced drama is so frustrating. I literally wanted to throw the book out the window.

These characters deserve better.

Three stars because I loved them when they were actually functioning like human beings and not drama puppets. Three stars for the small town side characters, who I have loved the whole way through this series (I'd give THEM a higher rating). And three stars for the diversity of a Latine character (even if the Spanish was sometimes questionable.)

Will I read the last book? Of course. I want to read about the other couple, but I KNOW that I'm going to be frustrated as well. Listen, I didn't think I was going to get as annoyed as with the climax of book one (because book two was actually kind of okay with the climax), but oh man. The FRUSTRATION.

Sigh. Moving on. Read this series if you want cute moments and sexy characters, but be prepared for the moments of frustration. This FMC has a lot of things to work through and I think one of the things that frustrates me the most about these third act breakups is that they feel like they come out of nowhere. They're fine in the moment and then boom, "I'm a coward."

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26. Breathless by Amy McCulloch--⭐️⭐️⭐️

One of the issues I have with adult thrillers is that I sometimes build them up a lot more in my head than the story itself. While BREATHLESS kind of suffers from this, it had its interesting and captivating moments.

I thought the mountain climbing aspect of the book was really cool and I wanted the MC to prove everyone wrong, including her awful ex-boyfriend. Granted I know nothing about mountain climbing, but that aspect of the book is probably one of the main reasons why I kept listening to this audiobook.

The mystery was not predictable but also it kind of was? LOL. It's hard to explain--I didn't actively think it was one person, but when it was all revealed, I thought it made a lot of sense. Like I said, I thought the mountain climbing was the true thrilling aspect of this book.

Overall, this was fun and I loved that ending, but it wasn't something I think I'll be thinking about a month from now. It was good, but *shrug*.

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27. Slewfoot by Brom--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I didn't know what to expect from this beautiful book. I purchased it a couple of years ago because all of my friends were talking about it, so of course I fell to the peer pressure. Just like the beautiful and eerie artwork, the story itself is unsettling and straddles that morally grey line of justified vengeance and anger versus a society's portrayal of evil (ie. a woman refusing to be cowed by a male's authority.)

Reading this gave me this odd sense of satisfaction when everything came to a head--especially thinking about all of the women who were accused of witchcraft and murdered. I especially felt this anger when I think about how many people the MC helped and how those people let their fear and hatred guide their actions against her. I think, beyond the cowardice of a man not accepting defeat, that angered me the most--women turning on each other because of a male dominated society's idealism and "godliness".

Needless to say, I loved this and couldn't put it down. I wanted to know what came next, even though I KNEW it wouldn't be something good. I'm just grateful that Brom knew that I would be looking for those satisfying moments of vengeance.

Also, I'd call this terror in the sense of that overhanging fear of what comes next. But even with the gory bits and the blood lust, I'd say the real terror in this book is humanity and how easily they are swayed. It all leads to me wanting to ask: who is the true devil here?

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28. From Dead to Worse by Charlaine Harris--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I can't believe I've made it this far! Although, I have this feeling I have because the deja vu is hitting me HARD.

FROM DEAD TO WORSE had so much going on, but unlike some of the other books before this one, this one actually took place closer to home. I kind of missed reading about Sookie's misadventures near her home. We got to revisit a lot of her relationships with the men in her life in this one--like the cleanser book for any ends that weren't fully cut clean.

I may have been spoiled for who's endgame, so I am totally seeing how Harris starting laying down the little hints here and there. But even so, knowing this doesn't stop certain moments from feeling bittersweet for me.

More things were revealed and Sookie grew even more as a character. I understood why she made the choices she made because she's finally putting her self-worth above those of the men in her life, but I still DID feel a little bad for her beau in this one. But again, I am on her side because she's been dealt some shitty men cards in the last eight books.

Onto the next one!

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29. The Fake Mate by Lana Ferguson--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

After trying and failing to read Ferguson's THE NANNY, I really wasn't sure what to expect with this vastly different genre of a book. I'm honestly so glad I decided to give this a shot anyway because THIS WAS SO MUCH FUN.

I was hooked onto the story and I loved the different tropes that were used. The whole grumpy/sunshine thing will always be a winner with me, and I am a puddle for this kind of tension. And don't even get me started on the smut. Omg, this man. The dirty talk in this was *chef's kiss*. This man is hot HOT.

I also really liked how the climax of the story was handled, even if one of my least favourite tropes was temporarily employed. I admire a self-sufficient FMC who can slap some sense into the MMC.

I do recommend this book to romance lovers, but I know that the topics explored in this book may be new to some. Research beforehand might be an awkward time LOL.

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30. Just Happy to Be Here by Naomi Kanakia--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I want to preface my review by stating that I am not a member of the Trans community, so my opinions on this book are from an outsider's perspective.

JUST HAPPY TO BE HERE was an intense read, both because of the clear transphobia and because of the MC's youth/naive nature about the people around her. The number of times she was cut off by those around her, or had such clear transphobic comments and actions done against her and she brushed them off was rage-inducing. I think I know why she does this--especially at the end, when it all ties up really nicely together, but in the moment, I felt immense rage towards the people around her.

Kanakia's novel touches on so much happening right now in society and how people twist narratives to fit their agendas and their means. How some people can see one person as an "object" to further their ideologies.

This book just made me feel a lot and made me so angry, but I know I am privileged in my cis-life. My heart broke for the kids who are in these situations and/or are surrounded by people who just refuse to see beyond their own biases and hatred.

I also appreciate the representation of the complex familial relationship between the MC and her parents--it may have been imperfect, but as an adult, I can see the love there for their daughter.

Between the beautiful cover, the emotionally stimulating and thought-provoking story, and the raw reality of a young character trying to figure herself out, I do recommend JUST HAPPY TO BE HERE. I do also recommend that the TWs be heeded: transphobic language, transphobia, internalized racism, transmisogyny. Read with care--but know that this is a pretty important story. Also, Kanakia has a pretty great author's note at the end!

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31. The Probability of Everything by Sarah Everett--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

THE PROBABILITY OF EVERYTHING was so much more than what I was expecting and although my heart feels wounded and my eyes are still feeling that aching pressure after a good cry, I'm so grateful I was able to experience it.

Twelve year old me wishes she had this book to read when my world changed so irrevocably, much like the MC of this book.

This heartbreaking novel follows a young scientist-to-be who likes to deal with probabilities in exchange for the anxiety surrounding her world ending. We are faced with a family grieving the end and how everyone handles it differently.

I don't even know what else to say about this book for fear of spoiling it--but know that it is powerful, important, and heart-rending.

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32. Long Shot by Kennedy Ryan--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Re-read: January 2024

I've been wanting to re-read LONG SHOT for a while, even though it is a very heavy and dark book. I had forgotten just how dark this book gets and while I highly recommend it, I do still super recommend you check out the trigger warnings.

Despite the dark and the abuse, the shining light was the blossoming romance between the two MCs and how, if something is truly destined for you, it'll happen.

LONG SHOT is a book full of emotion, heart, heartbreak, and a bit of magic in the sense that Karma is a bitch and it comes for all. Also, the FMC is one strong woman who did everything she could to protect those she loves. Kennedy touches on the misconceptions that haunt survivors of DA, which I thought was a very important aspect of the book.

Now I want to read the rest of the trilogy, which I never read after the first time I read this one.

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33. Two Twisted Crowns by Rachel Gillig--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I am always wary of sequels--especially when it's for fantasy books I initially really enjoyed. Somehow, Rachel Gillig delivers a sequel that was even better than the first book. TWO TWISTED CROWNS was a delight of a read full of dark moments, high intensity, anger, and a love story I felt more deeply than in book one.

The angst alone between two of the characters I wasn't expecting to see together was better than I could have ever hoped for. This was what made this book even more fun--just me casually waiting for these characters to just cross that line with each other.

Also, I found that TWO TWISTED CROWNS had me reacting more viscerally towards the hateful villains. The way I wanted to smack a bitch in this book because how dare they hurt these precious beings?

And, hi, I wasn't expecting to cry? Imagine that I'm enjoying this darker fantasy novel when all of a sudden, my eyes start to water during an emotional scene.

Let's applaud Gillig for making this a duology (hopefully) and not dragging this in a ten series saga. This whole series was such an incredible piece of fiction. I'm glad I fell into the hype and read these two books.

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34. Holes by Louis Sachar--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Re-read January 2024

I don't even know how many times I read this when I was a kid. Reading it as an adult now was such an interesting experience. For one, the story felt a lot shorter and quicker than I remember it being. I also remembered everything because I'm not kidding when I say that I read this A LOT as a kid.

Being an adult, I can also see how truly sad this story could get--especially one of the historical stories told throughout the book.

Such an amazing classic and truly a gem.

___

Have you read any of these books? Would you recommend them?

___

Happy reading!

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theinquisitxor · 4 months

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December 2023 Reading Wrap Up

I read 11 books in December, and it was a great reading month to finish the year. I read 4 audiobooks, and 7 physical books.

1.The Lost Metal (Mistborn 7) by Brandon Sanderson 4/5 stars. I’m glad I read this series, and reading on audio was definitely the way to go for me. I enjoyed this last installment in the series, and I loved how this book flung the doors wide open for the Cosmere and relations to other books. Adult High Fantasy, read on audio.

2. A Strange and Stubborn Endurance by Foz Meadows, 5/5 stars. I reread this favorite in anticipation for the sequel. This book has a lot of what I enjoy-- a character driven political fantasy romance with plenty of representation and a good dose of drama. I enjoyed my reread just about as much as the first. Adult Fantasy Romance, Queer

3.All the Hidden Paths by Foz Meadows, 4/5 stars. This was a good follow up adventure following our two main characters from book 1. There were some tropes/elements I didn't enjoy as much, but it was still a gripping and engaging as the first book. Adult Fantasy Romance, Queer

4. Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones, 5/5 stars. When people ask me "what's your favorite book?" this is the answer I give. I like to reread this every other year or so, especially around the holidays. Middle Grade fantasy

5.Castle in the Air by Diana Wynne Jones, 3/5 stars. Despite HMC being my favorite, I've never actually read the 2 follow up books. I finally told myself I would read these before the end of the year. This was a fun enjoyable story that takes us to another part of this fantasy land that DWJ created, with new and old characters. It's not nearly on the same level as HMC, but I enjoyed reading it and getting more of the classic DWJ wit and narration. middle grade fantasy

6. House of Many Ways by Diana Wynne Jones, 4/5 stars. Diana Wynne Jones was so clever, and that really shines through in this story. I think part of the reason why I put off reading the two sequels to HMC for years was because I never wanted the story to end and be "done". This was one of the last books DWJ ever wrote, and it really feels like saying goodbye. middle grade fantasy

7. Index, A History of the: A Bookish Adventure from Medieval Manuscripts to the Digital Age by Dennis Duncan. If you enjoy book history and diving deep into a niche topic, then I think this is a great book. It's amazing how the concept of the 'index' has existed in some form since humans began writing. Nonfiction, read on audio.

8. The Dark Is Rising by Susan Cooper, 4/5 stars. I reread this via the BBC Radio production, while listening to the corresponding days for each segment. I really enjoyed this production, with different voices for each characters, and background noises as well. Gave a very cinematic experience.

9. Gathering Moss: A Natural and Cultural History of Mosses by Robin Wall Kimmerer, 5/5 stars. I loved this book narrated by the author herself. I loved learning more about moss, while also getting essays about the authors life, work, and natural world around us. I very much recommend this one. Nonfiction, read on audio.

10. The Blue Sword (Damar #1) by Robin McKinley, 5/5 stars. I really enjoyed my time reading this book and this was a good reminder of what makes classic fantasy so great. This novel is also proof that you can have a fully realized fantasy story with great characters, lore, and plot, and have it all under 300 pages. This is one I can see myself rereading.

11. The Hero and the Crown (Damar 2) by Robin McKinley, 4/5 stars. A good prequel to book 1 and exploration of some of the myths/stories from book 1. This is very much a Girl + Horse + Magical Sword go on an adventure and save the kingdom type story.

That's it for December! It was a strong finish to the end of the year, and pushed me over 100 books for 2023. Here's to 2024 and another good reading year! 🥂

January TBR:

A Winter's Promise (Mirror Visitor series) by Christelle Dabos + book 2?

A Fragile Enchantment by Allison Saft

Realm Breaker by Victoria Aveyard + book 2?

The Atlas Complex by Olivie Blake

Mislaid in Parts Half-Known by Seanan McGuire (audio)

Emily Wilde's Map of the Otherlands by Heather Fawcett

Beartown by Frederik Backman + book 2?

Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer (audio)

#December reading wrap up #2023 reading wrap up #the lost metal #a strange and stubborn endurance #all the hidden paths #damar robin mckinley #the blue sword #the hero and the crown #howls moving castle #diana wynne jones #robin wall kimmerer

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ofliterarynature · 4 months

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DECEMBER 2023 WRAP UP

[loved liked ok no thanks (reread) book club*]

Mixed Magics • Chalice • To Shape a Dragon's Breath • The Haunting Season • Hither Page • The Henchmen of Zenda • System Collapse • The Phantom of the Opera • An Unexpected Peril • A Minor Chorus* • The September House • (The Dream Thieves) • The Fragile Threads of Power • The Pinhoe Egg • (Network Effect) • Some Desperate Glory

total: 16 (audiobook: 12 / ebook: 4)

Happy New Year booklr! Here's to actually getting my last monthly wrap-up post of 2023 out in decent time for once.

Some Desperate Glory - I'm getting myself off to a bad start here because I don't actually remember much from the book and I didn't write a review at the time. oops. But I do remember that once things got going I was hooked, and I couldn't wait to pick the audiobook back up. Definitely some content warnings to look out for, but an incredible read. I definitely need to go back and check out the author's other work.

Network Effect - the last book of my Murderbot reread, still great, glad to have finally read this in a text format! Also better suited to be read *after* Fugitive Telemetry, I wish I'd known to read them in chronological order the first time.

The Pinhoe Egg - a nice wrap up to the main Chrestomanci series! Though if anyone can tell me why on eARTH the 'recommended' reading order is like *that*, please explain it to me. I'd forgotten so many things by the time we got back to Cat, if I ever reread I'm going chronologically.

The Fragile Threads of Power - lord help me, I could do a whole rant. A quick summary of my relationship to this series: loved Shades of Magic when it first came out, did not love/was very annoyed by most of it when I reread them in 2023. Also have not really liked any of Schwab's other work. BUT. I was under the impression that this spinoff would have new main characters, and the old ones would be present but not in the center. If I didn't just make this up, it was LIES. The original MC's still dominate probably at least 60% of the book, and you'd think 7 years in-book and more experience on behalf of the writer would mature them, but a) no, and b) so many goddamn flashbacks. And Kel's assasin-sona was so cringe I wanted to cry. I did actually like the new main character which really is the biggest shame of all. If you see me contemplating the next book please stop me.

The Dream Thieves - I don't know that I have much to add yet to my thoughts about TRB in my Nov post, but I've been having a very strange experience where when I'm actively reading these, I'm having an incredibly good time; when I'm not I completely forget I was reading it. lol?

The September House - this is possibly the closest to my ideal horror book that I've ever found??!!? I have a weird relationship with horror, wherein I am not uninterested, but I almost never enjoy the ones I read (I think it has to do with my irl anxiety, idk). But THIS one. It's such an INCREDIBLE blend of like, mundane horrors and dark humor? I loved it. The "you can live with the horrors if you just follow the rules" is very much my vibe, and the way the author chose to have it integrate with the main character's experiences of domestic abuse was very smart. Deeply enjoyed, but probably won't be a favorite.

A Minor Chorus - this month's book club pick! I really really wish I'd liked this, and I'm torn between "thank god it was short," and "oh I wish this was longer." It's about a queer Indigenous doctoral student in Canada who's somewhat lost his way on his dissertation and is instead writing a novel (maybe), inspired by the stories of people in his community. On one hand, the writing was sometimes very beautiful and the different stories were interesting! On the other, my academic-speak abilities are limited, and the narrator did not hold back. He even explicitly states at one point, oh I can't describe my book this way to [character] because he won't understand my academic language. And...yeah. My brain got a little overwhelmed and I skimmed a lot of those parts. The hopeful part of me thinks if that if the book had been longer maybe I would have had time to "get it," but idk.

An Unexpected Peril - Veronica Speedwell is as Veronica Speedwell does. Had a good time with this even though it's proving to not be the most memorable. Mostly I remember intensely panicking over whether or not V had practiced forging the princess's signature, lol.

The Phantom of the Opera - this was a last minute sub for my classics challenge; I've never seen any of the adaptations, but I happened to see the book on tumblr when I was scrambling for a replacement and thought it might be fun. And it was! Quite ridiculous and dramatic, and I had a good time reading it. I was surprised by the outsider POV on the story, but it was good, just a shame that it didn't allow Christine to tell her own story. If anyone has a Christine-centered retelling I should read, let me know! And are there any adaptations I should watch?

System Collapse - new Murderbot! I was so excited for this, I'm irritated that my brain and work schedule didn't want to cooperate and let me read my nice pretty hardcover; I ended up getting the audiobook from the library instead. I had an incredible time, because it's Murderbot, how could I not? But it's also interesting, because Network Effect felt quite cohesive and contained on its own, but this feels very much like an in-between story (almost like Fugitive Telemetry), rather than a continuation of the same thread. I'll be interested to see where Martha takes us from here.

The Henchmen of Zenda - my last KJ Charles of the year! I did mean to get through all of her books, but things slipped by me these last few months so I still have a couple, but managed to fit this standalone in! It's not the only time she's pulled characters from works of classic fiction, and I admit, I'm now very curious and kind of want to read the original Prisoner of Zenda? Definitely this version had an exciting plot that was fun to read, though I don't think it'll be my favorite of her works (yay for a non-traditional relationship structure tho :)

Hither, Page - I don't think I've read Cat Sebastian before, but I've had this one recommended and it sounds right up my ally - historical/cozy myster/spy shenanigans/gay romance! And it was an incredibly pleasant read, would recommend, but I do think it could have been better as both a mystery and a romance.

The Haunting Season - I almost picked this up in October for spooky season, but put if off for Dec since it's meant to be wintery ghost stories - and only just remembered it in time! I almost wish I hadn't. The first two stories were so meh for me that I almost DNF'd it, I just didn't want the fuss of having to find a new audiobook for work the last day before Christmas break. Luckily Natasha Pulley showed up next with a good story (I really ought to read her books) and there was a good run of 4 stories with another 2 meh to round things out. It wasn't a total loss, but I wouldn't really recommend.

To Shape a Dragon's Breath - If you've seen people singing the praises of this book, they're not wrong! It's a very good if sometimes heavy read, and this is definitely the closest I've gotten to liking a boarding school story since Protector of the Small (I got burned out on them very quickly, lol). It does sometimes read like the debut it is, it's not perfect (lots of infodump speeches, lord save me from the technicalities of alchemy/chemistry, and I would have liked to see more done in her relationship with her dragon), but it's also doing some incredible and unique things that really make me want to see more books in this series and whatever else the author writes.

Chalice - I've read Robin Mckinley before and I've found her work ok, but this one has been repeatedly recommended in the HOTE discord server - I figured it would be a good one to wrap up the year with! And surprise surprise, the fealty-coded discord loves a book about... fealty XD and good stewardship, and magic bees, etc. It's incredibly on brand, and I had a lovely time with this fairy-tale of a book.

Mixed Magics - a collection of Chrestomanci short stories; I actually read one of the stories a few months ago due to the recommended reading order (bleh), and thought it would be fairly simple to finish it off before the end of the year, now that I'd finished the rest of the series. All fun, if not equally interesting, and a nice end to the year. Now I just need to find a new Diana Wynne Jones series to try (not on audiobook, alas, my library is all out of those).

(I did almost consider then binging the Hither, Page sequel on new year's eve, just so I wouldn't split the series, but decided against it :D)

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loveroftoomanyfandoms · 9 months

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Angel of God, My Guardian Dear Chapter 17: Matt

Pairing: Matt Murdock x F!Reader

Rating: Explicit (18+, MINORS DNI)

Story Summary: While speaking at a local school for visually impaired youth, Matt runs into his childhood best friend, with whom he lost touch almost 20 years prior.

Warning/Tags: Phone sex 🔥

Word Count: ~2k of pure porn

A/N: Enjoy some smut, y'all.

Matt sighed and ran a hand through his hair as he sat on his sofa listening to an audiobook he had gotten from the library the previous week. Y/N was out of town at a library conference and he was waiting for her to call.

His book automatically paused as his phone began to ring.

Matt smiled as he swiped to answer. "Hi, angel."

"Hi, Matty," Y/N replied. "How's it going?"

"It's going good. How's the conference?"

"It's fine, just the usual library stuff -- how to deal with difficult patrons, the depressing increase in book banning attempts by morons who've probably never read a book in their life, what to do when you're stuck at a library conference away from your very sexy boyfriend for 5 days…"

Matt grinned. "Learn anything interesting in that last session?"

Y/N huffed out a light laugh. "Actually, yeah, the presenter suggested calling him and telling him how much you miss him."

Matt chuckled, his heart warming. "I miss you too, angel."

He paused, listening for signs of anyone in Y/N's vicinity. "Are you settled in for the night?"

"Yeah, some of the others decided to go out for drinks but I wasn't feeling up to it. It's been a long conference and I haven't been sleeping too well."

Matt hummed. "Well maybe I can help you with that."

"Oh?" Y/N's voice piqued with interest. "How so, Mr. Murdock?"

Matt licked his lips. There had been something else he had been wanting to try with Y/N but the opportunity hadn't presented itself until now. "Remember how I helped you out the last time you couldn't sleep?"

Y/N let out a breathy laugh. "You mean how you made me come so hard my brain went completely blank for a moment? Yeah, I definitely remember that."

"Well, I was thinking maybe we could do something like that… just over the phone."

Y/N gasped playfully. "Matthew, are you suggesting that we have phone sex?"

Matt hummed. "Maybe… if you're interested."

"Oh, I'm very interested. Give me just a second to get situated though?"

Matt moved from the sofa to his bedroom. "Sure, angel."

"Are you in bed?"

"I will be in a minute. I was sitting on the sofa."

"Oh, okay." Y/N paused. "Just for the record… I, uh, I've never done this before, so… apologies if I'm awkward."

Matt shook his head even though he knew Y/N couldn't see him. "Hey, no, it's okay. To be honest, I haven't actually done this either, but it's just like our sexy talk at home, right? Except we'll just have to also tell each other what we'd like to be doing instead of actually doing it."

He grinned and dropped his voice down a register. "Plus you know how much I love the sound of your voice, angel. Can't wait to hear you while you're touching yourself for me."

Y/N sucked in a breath. "Okay."

"Are you settled into bed yet?"

"Uh huh. Oh wait, what are you wearing?"

Matt could feel Y/N cringe over the phone. While yes, that was typically a pretty stereotypical lead-in to phone sex, it actually was a pretty important question since they couldn't see each other.

"Actually I just got out of the shower about 20 minutes ago, so I'm wearing a pair of boxers. What about you? What are you wearing?"

"Oh, um…" Y/N paused as she pulled the covers over her. "A black tank top and black and red plaid pajama pants."

Matt settled in his bed. "Those soft cotton ones you like to lounge around in?"

"Uh huh."

"Mmm, good to know. I like those on you." Matt grinned. "I like them even better on my bedroom floor."

Y/N huffed out a laugh. "Smooth, Murdock."

"Just telling the truth, angel." Matt sighed. "I wish you were here in my bed right now, because you know what I would do?"

Y/N's breath hitched. "Uh-uh, what?"

"I'd cup your face in my hands and kiss you. Love kissing you, angel, thought about it for years before I got the chance."

Y/N let out a breathy sigh. "Mmm, me too, Matty, used to stare at your mouth all the time when we were kids, wanted to know what your lips would feel like pressed to mine."

Matt groaned softly. "God, Y/N, had I known how you actually felt about me back then I probably wouldn't have been able to help myself, would've had to find out what your lips tasted like, both with and without that coconut lip balm on them."

"Good thing you can kiss me all you want now, hmm?"

Matt smiled. "Mmhmm. I'd kiss you breathless then tangle my fingers in your hair and tilt your head to the side so I could move down to your neck. Love to feel your pulse flutter under my lips, angel, have to hold back from marking you and feeling the blood rise to the surface of your delicate skin."

Y/N's breath hitched. "No, baby, don't hold back. Want you to mark me, Matty."

Matt closed his eyes, picturing Y/N whimpering underneath him in pleasure as he tattooed his name in Braille on her skin, soothing each mark his lips left with his tongue before moving on to the next one. "Fuck -- don't tempt me, angel."

"Love to wear your marks on me, sweetheart, know that it's you who put them there." Y/N giggled. "My sexy vampire."

Matt grinned. "Mmm, definitely going to have to mark you up when you get home then, remind you who you belong to."

"Mmmhmm. So what else would you do?"

"I'd slide the hand that wasn't buried in your hair underneath your tank top so I could feel your soft skin." Matt let out a quiet groan. "Used to dream about it when we were younger, sweetheart, what your body would feel like under my hands and mouth if I ever got you in my bed other than to sleep."

"Mmm, and?"

Matt groaned. "The real thing is even better than I imagined. You feel so fucking incredible, Y/N, want you all the time."

He licked his lips as he heard the shuffle of clothing. "Touch yourself for me, angel."

Y/N sighed. "Mmm, Matty, love to feel your hands on my skin, baby, whether you're being gentle and caressing me while we're making love or gripping my hips tight while you fuck me into oblivion."

Matt hissed, his cock starting to stir. "Take your top off for me, sweetheart, want to hear your hand caressing that soft, smooth skin of yours."

He could hear Y/N pulling her shirt up and over her head. "That's my good girl."

Y/N hummed. "What would you do once you got my top off?"

"I'd move down to those perfect tits of yours. First I'd start with the left one, tease it to a peak with my tongue before getting my mouth properly on it." Matt groaned as Y/N gasped out a breath. "That's right, angel, touch yourself for me, imagine those are my hands caressing you."

Y/N's breath hitched. "Mmm, Matty, your hands feel so good on my skin, love the way you touch me."

Matt groaned. "By now I'd be able to smell just how fucking wet you were for me, angel. God, your scent is intoxicating."

"Mmhmm, just for you, Matty. Only you make me feel this way, God , you turn me on so much." Y/N let out a soft moan. "Want your mouth on me, sweetheart, need you."

Matt pulled his boxers down, freeing his cock. "Need my mouth on that beautiful cunt of yours, angel?"

"Uh huh. Feels so fucking good, Matt, God , that mouth of yours is magical."

Matt wrapped a hand around himself. "Mmm, well since you asked so sweetly I'd kiss my way down your stomach while I slowly slid your pajamas down, then when I finally had you naked I'd have to kiss and feel my way down your body one more time before I got to taste your sweetness."

Y/N whimpered. "God yes, please , Matty, want you to make me come on your mouth."

"Go ahead, angel, let me hear how wet you are for me." Matt groaned at the slick slide of Y/N inserting two fingers into herself. "You taste so fucking good, Y/N, could spend hours eating out that beautiful cunt of yours, see how many times I can make you come on my tongue alone."

Y/N gasped. "Fuck, Matt ."

Matt spit in his hand before taking himself once again, the dryness of his hand alone uncomfortable in its friction. "As good as you taste, it's nothing compared to the feeling of being buried deep inside your tight cunt, so once I had drunk my fill of your juices I'd slide my cock through your folds getting myself nice and slick, then I'd ease myself inside you. Gotta start out nice and slow, angel, don't want to hurt you."

Y/N bit back a moan. "Mmph -- fuck. You're so big, Matt, always make me feel so full, baby, stretch me out so good."

Matt sped his hand up. "Your pussy feels amazing, Y/N, like it was made perfectly to fit my cock."

"Feel so good inside me every time, Matt." Y/N sucked in a breath. "Love to feel your cock in me, sweetheart, fucking me so deep, filling me up."

Matt groaned. "Can't wait until you get home, sweetness, miss you so much."

"Fuck, Matty, miss you too, baby, hate not being able to see you, to touch you. Need you inside me, Matt, wanna feel you." Y/N gasped. "Want you to grip my hips tight while you pound into me, make me feel you deeper than ever before."

"Oh, don't worry, angel, gonna stuff you nice and full when you get home, come so deep in that tight wet cunt of yours that you feel my cum inside you for days ." Matt hissed, his orgasm edging closer. "Gonna come for me, angel?"

"Uh huh. Close, Matty."

Matt tightened his grip on himself. "Me too, Y/N. Fuck, you always take me so well, sweetheart, such a good girl for me."

"God -- yes, yours , Matty, always." Y/N's breath hitched. "I'm so close, baby."

Matt pitched his voice lower. "Want you to let go for me, angel, let me hear those pretty sounds you make for me while I'm filling your pussy up with my cum."

Y/N gasped. "Yes , Matt , sweetheart, want to feel it, want to -- Ah !"

Matt jerked himself roughly a few more times, the sound of Y/N crying out his name in ecstasy making him groan as ropes of hot cum shot out onto his stomach.

He could hear Y/N panting on the other end as she came down from her high. "Fuck, Y/N ."

Y/N hummed. "Mmm, love you."

"Love you too." Matt grabbed a few tissues and wiped the quickly cooling cum off of himself. "Feel better?"

"Mmhmm." Y/N sighed. "Still miss you, baby, but luckily I'm just gone for a few more days."

Matt grinned. "I miss you too, and whenever you get home I'm going to show you just how much I'm missing you."

Y/N huffed out a light laugh. "Mmm. Is that a promise?"

"Oh, definitely. You're not leaving my bed for at least 24 hours."

"Deal." Y/N yawned. "I'll call you tomorrow?"

Matt nodded. "Okay, angel. I love you."

"Love you too."

"Sweet dreams."

"Mmm, you too, Matty. 'Bye, baby."

"Bye."

Matt hung up and pulled his boxers up, then lay in bed for a moment silently contemplating before getting up and going to his Daredevil trunk.

He pulled out the small square box he had hidden the day before and ran his hand over the contents, smiling softly before setting it back in his trunk.

He went back into his bedroom as his phone rang once again. "Hello, this is Matthew Murdock."

He grinned. "Yes, hi, thank you for getting back to me. I'm sorry for bothering you, but I need a favor…"

#lotmf writes #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x fem!reader #matt murdock x female reader #matt murdock x yn #AoG Masterlist

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lastontheboat · 8 months

Note

Fandom creators self rec game! Choose five favourites from your own creations (and tell me why, if you like!), then pass on to at least five other people. I'd love to hear what you're proudest of.

Thank you @tackytigerfic for providing me an opportunity for navel-gazing! I enjoyed reading about your own favourites; I find it super interesting to see what other creators value about their works.

Per my last letter (I hope you choke on it)

This is my favourite completed fic for a number of reasons:

1. I had always wanted to try writing an epistolary

2. I had always wanted to try collaborating on a fic with a friend

3. The writing process was an absolute joy

It feels like a distillation of many of my favourite things, but unlike many fics the creation process didn't involve tearing my hair out trying to make it do what I wanted. Whenever I'd get stuck, I'd just close the document and go to bed, then when I woke up the next morning @fluxweeed would have added several new scenes that set my brain on fire. It was an absolutely magical experience for me, and I'm extremely fond of the end result. This is probably the fic of mine that I've re-read the most, and it delights me every time!

Podfic of Stop All The Clocks, by firethesound

I've got a lot of podfics to choose from, but this is one that I'm particularly proud of. The original fic is imprinted on my soul, but the thing that sticks with me more than the actual plot is the sensation of reading it and feeling my heart break over and over.

Making podfics is a very personal craft for me. It's an investment of my time, and I generally choose ones to record that I strongly associate with a particular first-time reading experience. This was my sixth large podfic project, and I really wanted my reading to amplify the heartbreak that's already present in the text. It was a much more emotional recording and editing process than most of my podfics, but it's also the only one I've listened to entirely after releasing it.

I'm extremely fond of every listener who has taken the plunge and commented about their experience of it, and completely understand everyone who has been like "I don't fuck with that fic. You couldn't pay me to listen it."

body electric

This is the first fic I can recall writing that was entirely driven by a feeling. I remember being consumed by the idea of that spark between Harry and Draco, of them needing to feed it and hold it but being unable to act upon it. I was between jobs and had a lot of time to myself, and I wrote this fic in a fugue state over the space of two days. I had never experienced a writing process so feverish before, and I don't know if I will again.

I also need to shout out the beta feedback I got from @zaharya on this one, whose very insightful comments about the passage of time in the second chapter led to me adding a bunch of my favourite lines to it:

“I want to bend you over this table,” he says, panting now. “I want you under me, here in my workshop. You’ll leave here and every time you smell wood shavings you’ll think of me.” “I already do,” Malfoy says, his voice cracking.

Podfic of If The Fates Allow, by saras_girl

I spend a lot of time listening to audiobooks these days, and I really appreciate being able to consume so many stories while driving or cooking. For me, recording a podfic is about giving others the opportunity to experience some of my favourite fics, and trying to capture some of what they mean to me in my voicing.

saras_girls fics hold a very special place in my heart, and this one is my absolute favourite of hers. As a podfic, the biggest challenge here was dealing with the ensemble cast—it stretched the limits of unique voices I could do without them sounding forced, but it was also exciting trying to keep the voices consistent across 25 chapters.

the spirit is willing (the flesh is weak)

This is the newest fic that I finished (the only one so far in 2023), but I haven't made too much noise about it on here because it's attached to my alt account. This one started out as a concept that wouldn't leave me alone (Bill/Ginny fuck or die), but it's also another data point in my exploration of what it's like to write smut.

I still don't think it comes naturally to me, whatever that means—I'm much more comfortable keeping my writing to Teen, but I'm very satisfied with how this fic achieves what I set out to do with it. It was a stretch, but a good stretch!

#my works #navel-gazing #i've always wanted to put together some behind the scenes posts about my creations #thank you helping that process along!

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nonsubstantial · 1 month

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FEBRUARY 2024 ART FASCINATION DIARY

If you missed my post last month, then I'll briefly explain that I thought it would be fun to write a short diary post each month, about the art that I've been obsessed with. Then, I can easily look back and remember what was making me happy all throughout 2024. If you are reading this, then I hope you will enjoy hearing about these things, or checking them out too!!!

MEMOIR / AUDIOBOOK: The Anthropocene Reviewed is John Green's memoir, framed as a collection of reviews of seemingly random aspects of 'the current geologic age'. I want to note that I had never finished any other John Green book, so I was going into this one as more of a hater than a fan. However, I was unexpectedly moved by it and now consider it one of the greatest books I've ever experienced. I also want to note that listening to the audiobook, narrated by John Green himself, really added a lot to the experience (including two additional chapters). Despite the subject matter being intensely personal, the genius of this memoir is that, by framing it as a collection of reviews, John Green is able to place greater emphasis on things outside of himself. Rather than just narrating his singular experiences, he creates a memoir to celebrate and sympathize with all life on planet Earth. It is informative and humbling— fascinating and earnest. I want to highly recommend this book (or audiobook) to everyone, because I feel like it will genuinely enrich your soul. There are chapters that will probably make you cry, but in a way that is healing and constructive. I give The Anthropocene Reviewed... 5 stars.

REALITY / GAME SHOW: RuPaul's Drag Race season 16 started in January of 2024, and has remained as my favorite thing on television for these past two months. It's another example of something that I had no interest in, until I was forced to watch it, and then it became one of my favorite things ever. Obviously, take all reality television with a grain of salt, but if you can do that then it's extremely inspiring to see the immense amount of talent that every contestant brings to the runway. I'm not really into fashion, but even I can appreciate the blend of comedy, creativity, and practiced technique that's on display here. These performers really do tell stories with their drag, and I look at the artform much differently than I did before I started watching. It has made every Saturday something to look forward to, and if you've never checked it out before, then I've got to recommend it.

MUSIC: my favorite album of February was 「Wall Of Eyes」 This is actually a new album, by a band called The Smile, that was released in the final week of January, and I only heard about it because Vinny Vinesauce featured it on one of his streams. If you've heard of Radiohead, then you'll at least recognize the singer, Thom Yorke (although the three person band also features Radiohead's Jonny Greenwood, and drummer Tom Skinner). Despite The Smile seeming (at first) like just a side project of a couple Radiohead members, let me honestly admit that I have never connected with any Radiohead album as much as I've connected with this. I truly think every song on this album is incredible, and I listened to it front to back almost every day this February. Its genre is hard to describe, and maybe that's where some of the magic lies. It's light and acoustic, soft and jazzy... beautiful, but also a little tense and attention grabbing at times. As usual, I'd recommend just listening if you're curious about it at all, with my favorite song linked HERE!

MANGA: I was able to read a few more volumes of Dungeon Meshi this month, and I feel like it might soon claim the title of the single best manga I've ever read. Honestly, it's got it all. The themes, the artwork, the characters, the pacing, the paneling, the story's structure... I'm not exaggerating when I say that any way I look at this manga to critique it, I find excellence. In everything, there is deliberate ingenuity and soul. I will reveal that there is less focus on cooking, and more focus on worldbuilding as the story goes on, but I'm not even disappointed by that because everything it dishes out is still so good. I'm serious about this, especially if you're watching the show, try to find some copies of this manga or read it online. It's absolutely worth it.

#personal #the anthropocene reviewed #rpdr 16 #wall of eyes #dungeon meshi #february #2024 #2024 reviews

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