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#i've loved hanging out with my aunt so much. she took care of me a lot when i was a kid so in lot of ways it feels like being a kid again
xoxoemynn · 10 months
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Alluded to this post yesterday. Just some releasing into the void/explanation for potential quietness, cw: talk of terminal illnesses
In December 2021 my Aunt B lost a nearly 10 year battle with Alzheimer's.
Right around that same time my Aunt M was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.
My Aunt M is one of the kindest people I know. She's also aggressively positive and leans heavily on her faith, so it can be difficult to get an accurate update on how she's doing.
However, it became clear in the past two weeks she has taken a turn for the worse. It's not at the point where the end is imminent, but the optimism for having more years with her is greatly diminished. She won't beat the cancer; it's just a question of how much longer her body can hold out.
My dad wanted to visit her before she got worse, so he went to see her this past weekend. I was his chauffeur to/from the train station. He came back looking very shaken. I don't think he was expecting her to be as weak as she was.
Last night Aunt M was admitted to the hospital with an infection. We don't have much in the way of updates yet.
While he was gone, I was also going back and forth to my mom's. She has a number of physical ailments herself, including some daily care she can't tend to herself. It took a lot of coordination/trust for her to be able to be without my dad for a few days and for me to take care of her.
To top it off, Aunt B's widower, who was diagnosed with lung cancer back in 2003 and given a year to live but managed to keep on kicking, opted in the past week to stop chemo and enter palliative care.
Flip side, my 104 year old great aunt is still going strong and told my 76 year old dad he looks very young. She had TMNT on while my dad visited her.
All this is to say, it was a very heavy weekend. I was so busy for most of it that it didn't really hit me until Monday when things calmed down and now I've just walking around in a cloud of sadness. To be clear, I was never super close with my aunts/uncles, although, like I said, my Aunt M is just outrageously kind and her diagnosis was heartbreaking. But I especially feel horrible for my dad, who's probably losing both of his younger sisters in a span of a few years. I'm thinking a lot about my own parents' mortality and what that means and how we'll take care of them once one of them goes. I'm extremely aware there's not really much that can be done, other than to make sure everyone knows they're loved and provide as much comfort as we can. There just seems to be this cloud of illness and death and sadness hanging over my family. It's.......heavy.
I took a last minute PTO today to decompress a bit, and I do overall feel like more of a human. But if I'm quieter in the coming [insert duration of time here], that's why. The sadness just feels inescapable right now.
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I'm married and have children with WHO?!
Summary: Francesca and Violetta meet up with a magical girl named Roxy who takes them through different universes, where in every universe, something is always different and not everyone is with the same person they were with previously. Things get weird. And confusing. Send help.
The Violetta and Francesca we meet from this story is from what I would call "universe 1". It's a universe where Leonetta, Diecesca, Luty and Camila has children. Pablangie also has a kid, and Maxi and Andres is hinted to have kids. There is also a "universe 2" where everything here is the same, except that Franletta instead are married with kids. Often when I write fics, it either takes place in universe 1 or 2, the ones Vilu and Fran are together with determining it. Every other universe shown in this fic is simply made up for the occasion.
Violetta and Francesca sat in Violetta's backyard, clinking their glasses together. They were wearing their bikinis, and sunbathed as they had a careful eye on their respective daughters. Violetta's daughter Isadora and Francesca's daughter Diana were 2 years old, and played in the pool. A kiddie pool, don't worry, they did not let their toddlers go loose in a big pool.
It was soon time for the girls' naps and Violetta and Francesca hoped to let them tire themselves out. 
"Vilu, do you ever think you want to have more kids?" Francesca asked.
"I don't know. We'll see what the future holds. Right now I'm so pleased with just my little Isa."
"I feel the same. You know, I wanted to have three kids initially. But... you know how much Diana inspired me to write more songs."
"Yeah, your songs were beautiful on that album." As Vilu and Fran had gotten their kids just around a month or two apart, they spent a lot of time together taking walks and hanging out as they took care of their little ones. Similarly to what Violetta's mom did for her, both her and Francesca felt inspiration to write songs based on motherhood, and their love for their children. They released an album together and often sang songs from it as lullabies for their girls.
"I've realized just how much I wanna continue with my music career," Francesca said. "So, I think, once Diana is a bit older I'm gonna go back fully. I don't think I'm gonna have time to have more kids right now."
Violetta nodded. "I feel the same. I think it's so luxurious we can be home and work on music, but I wanna get out again."
Their daughters seemed to grow tired, so they saw it as a perfect opportunity to get them to bed.
Just 10 minutes later, the toddlers had fallen asleep, cuddling in Isadora's crib. It went smooth today.
"What do you wanna do now?" Violetta asked.
"I don't know, relax?" Francesca chuckled.
Violetta gave her a smug face. "I have a new wine."
"Really?"
"Yeah, I had to hide it really well, because Isadora is in a phase where she likes to open and close and grab onto everything she sees."
She dug out the wine bottle. It had the name Roxy on it.
"Camila gave it to me," Violetta said. "You can imagine why..."
"Did she make it herself? It seems a bit homemade..."
"Yeah, either she did it or her witch aunt. So let's hope there's no weird spell in this. She didn't say anything about it, though."
"Let's taste it and see what happens!"
They both poured up a glass each and took a sip.
"It tastes like regular wine," Francesca shrugged. 
"Yeah, it was fine..."
Then suddenly, and without warning, there was a flashing light. At first, they thought it was just the sun getting brighter, but no... it was something else. 
Something seemed to emerge from the flashing light... a red haired person? Blood red. Like... the wig Violetta had when she was... 
Suddenly, a carbon copy of Roxy, Violetta's alter ego, stood in front of them.
"Uh..." Violetta let out, "Who... are you?"
"I'm Roxy!" Roxy exclaimed.
"Yeah, but like... how? Who are you really? Roxy doesn't exist."
Roxy giggled. "Oh, in this universe, I don't! But you see, from my universe, I do exist!"
"Violetta, am I drunk?" Francesca asked. "This is not good, I can't go home later drunk with my toddler, I have to spend the night..."
"If you're drunk, I'm drunk," Violetta said. "But wait... I've never hallucinated when I'm drunk..."
"Are we drug tripping?! Was there drugs in Camila's witch spell wine?! Jesus Christ, keep it away from our children!"
"Take it easy," Roxy said. "Take my hand."
Violetta and Francesca unsurely looked at her.
"Take my hand," Roxy repeated. They did. 
As Roxy held both of their hands, she closed her eyes and exhaled slowly. Then suddenly, they traveled through this... void... it kinda looked like the digital world the three friends entered in that australian kids show. 
"Do you feel calmer?"
"Kind of?" Violetta asked. "But where are we?"
"We're traveling through the universes."
"Ok, but like... why?"
"Because it's fun."
"Hold on," Francesca said, "What exactly do you mean by that?"
Roxy took a deep breath, "Ok, you see... you live in what my device calls 'universe 1'. The ones you're married to, the ones your friends are together with, it's all supposed to be like that in that universe. But in other universes, things may be a little different... you might be married to completely other people, have completely other children, and live completely different lives. In some universes, you might not even know each other. Francesca, there's a universe in which you never moved from Italy! Violetta, there's a universe in which your mother never died when you were young!"
"Okay..." Violetta said, "And are we gonna see those universes?"
"Nope! That would take too long! We're simply gonna look through the universes in which you had the exact same upbringing as you had now, only that your current life is different!"
"I'm still very confused," Francesca admitted.
"You won't be for much longer! We're now entering universe 2!"
-
They ended up at what appeared to be Camila's house. 
"Who lives here?" Roxy asked.
"Camila," Vilu and Fran said in unison.
"Alright! Checking my device, she... still lives here. And she has a child named..."
"Kim."
"She does in this universe, too! Huh! So that's still the same."
They teleported to a new place.
"Ludmila and Naty lives here," Violetta explained, "In our universe."
"According to the device, they still live here, with their daughter... Stella?"
They nodded. This was the same.
Roxy went through the list. "Ok, I'm comparing universes here. Many similarities to your universe... Camila is the same, Ludmila and Naty is the same... your families are all the same... Maxi and Andrés have their twin boys in this universe, too..."
"Wait, what?" Violetta asked. "Maxi and Andres... they aren't even together!"
"Oh..." Roxy then started giggling. "Well, spoilers! They're gonna have some twin boys down the line!" Then she gasped. "Oohh... there is one thing that sticks out from this universe!"
"What?" Violetta asked.
She smirked. "Let me show you!"
They teleported to a brand new house.
"Who lives here?" Francesca asked.
"You."
"Me?"
"And you," Roxy pointed at Violetta aswell.
"We both live here?" Violetta asked. "Why?"
"You'll see..."
They suddenly noticed a little girl running out from the door. 
"Aww... she looks like you, Vilu!" Francesca said.
Then a slightly younger little girl came running out.
"And she looks like you!" Violetta said.
"Wait, girls!" a voice called. It sounded like Violetta.
Indeed, the Violetta from this universe stepped out on the porch. She was holding a little baby, with red curly hair. Francesca from this universe stepped out, too, standing next to her.
"Is that my kid?" Violetta asked.
"It is. He's adopted."
"That black haired little girl looks like me," Francesca said, "But she doesn't look like my Diana."
"And that brunette looks like me, but she's not my Isadora," Violetta said. 
Roxy turned to Francesca. "Have you ever wondered how it would be if you had three kids, like you originally planned to have before you settled with just one?"
"How do you know I-"
"I know everything. Anyway, in this universe, you do have three kids!"
"What? Where's the other two?"
"All three are in front of you!"
"But... aren't...?"
Suddenly, the Violetta and Francesca from this universe turned to each other with a glance. They then shared a kiss.
"Eww!" the brunette girl exclaimed.
"You have to accept that your mommies love each other, Elina!" this universe's Francesca said in a sing-song voice.
Meanwhile, the Francesca and Violetta from universe 1 stared in shock.
"Are we...?" Violetta said, lost at words.
Roxy smiled. "In this universe, none of you could really work it out with any of your boyfriends, and you instead started dating each other. This lead to a marriage, which led to three kids. Two of them produced with IVF, your beautiful daughters Elina and Carolina, and one adopted son named Oliver."
"I don't know how to feel," Francesca said. "I mean, I..." She smiled awkwardly at Vilu, "I wouldn't mind it... but..."
"I get it," Violetta said, smiling back. "We seem very happy together in this universe. But... where's Leon? And Diego?"
"The device does not say," Roxy said. "Literally, it just gets an error message. Maybe the universe has not decided yet..."
Violetta and Francesca weren't sure they wanted to know what that meant.
"But even if our kids in this universe look very adorable, I miss my Diana!" Francesca exclaimed. Violetta nodded, missing her own daughter aswell. 
"Well, then I have happy news, because you'll see your respective daughters again in the next universe we travel to!" Roxy assured them. "The next universe is called the 'canon endgames universe'."
"What does that mean?" Violetta asked.
"Don't worry about it."
-
As they entered the new universe, they ended up outside the house Violetta and Leon lived in with their daughter. Violetta sighed in relief. "Am I married to Leon?"
"You are," Roxy assured her, "And your little Isadora exists here. And your Diana exists, because you're married to Diego in this universe, Francesca." 
"I'm glad," Francesca said, "Mostly because of my daughter, but my husband isn't so bad either, hehe..."
"Well, while you two are back at the status quo... basically everyone else you know have it quite different."
They teleported to a park. Roxy immediately pointed at a teenage girl walking further away. She resembled Broduey in a way, but there were other genes mixed in too.
"Broduey has a daughter?" Francesca asked. Broduey didn't have any kids in her universe.
"Mhm... and guess who he has a daughter with."
Violetta and Francesca thought for a moment.
"You can go up to her, we're invisible," Roxy said. So, Francesca and Violetta did just that. 
"Is it just me, or does she also look a bit like... Camila?" Violetta whispered. She didn't know why she whispered, as no one could hear her as they were invisible.
"I know!" Francesca said, "But that's impossible! Broduey and Camila never worked out!"
"Maybe not in your universe," Roxy said.
Suddenly, a middle-aged looking Camila and Broduey ran up to the girl. Both of them were carrying toddlers. It seems like they had four kids in total, but the other three seemed to be triplets. Twins and triplets ran in Camila's family, so it wasn't too surprising. But oh boy, they seemed to have their hands full. 
"I don't wanna talk to you," the teenager said. 
"Sweetie, please," Camila said.
"I'm gonna go meet my friends," the teenager snapped and walked away from them. Broduey and Camila sighed. They were clearly stressed, holding three toddlers who wanted to wiggle out of their grip, and also a moody teenager at that. 
"I wanna hope that their marriage is healthy and good," Francesca said, "And that we just caught them on a bad day."
Broduey and Camila then started arguing, the way they always argued when they themselves were teenagers.
But then, like a minute later, they stopped, catched their breaths and put down all three toddlers so that they could share a kiss.
"I'm sorry," Camila said.
"I'm sorry," Broduey said.
They then noticed all three toddlers had ran off in different directions.
Camila took a deep breath. "Ready?"
Broduey took her hand. "Always."
They then ran in opposite directions, catching a toddler each, and then with the two toddlers on their grip, both went towards the third and grabbed them quickly. 
All in all, it seemed like their life was chaotic, but they seemed to manage.
"Ok, they seem to make it work," Violetta said.
"I say the triplets might have gotten their marriage a new spark," Roxy said, "Before they were born, and they just had their daughter... I don't wanna speak about it. It's why she is the way she is. Anyway, let's move on!"
Francesca and Violetta didn't have time to even say anything before they suddenly got teleported to a new house. 
They noticed a child around 12 years old standing by a car. "Mom! Hurry up!"
Out came Ludmila. She was also looking pretty middle aged.
"Is everyone older in this universe?" Violetta asked. "Camila and Broduey have a teenager."
"Yes, I forgot to mention, this universe is 10 years ahead. Your kids are almost teenagers, but I didn't want you to see them," Roxy explained, "I wanted you to watch them grow up for yourselves, in your own universe."
"Well, that's nice," Francesca said. "Is this Ludmila's... kid?"
"Mhm!"
"And let me guess... not with Naty."
"Not with Naty, no."
"Who, then?" Violetta asked. "A girl she met later in life, maybe?"
Roxy shook her head. 
Out came Federico. He wrapped his arms around Ludmila and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
"She and Fede...?" Violetta asked. 
"Is Ludmila closeted in this universe?" Francesca asked. "Or does she have a different sexuality?"
"Now, universes may be different, but people's personality and sexual orientation always stays the same," Roxy explained. "But Ludmila is not bisexual, nor pan, nor likes any other gender other than girls. She is closeted."
"Yeah, we know... she had a rough coming out with her mom..." Violetta said. 
"There is a universe in which Priscila Ferro married a woman named Sharon instead of your dad," Roxy said.
"What-"
"We won't visit that universe, as that does not have anything to do with you. But it's fun, Ludmila got a stepsister that was in a similar situation to her and the two bonded together and stopped their moms from taking over the world, which they were fully capable of doing because both Sharon and Priscila are dangerous women... anyway, in that universe she at least didn't push you down the stairs, Vilu, but she did push another teenage girl down the stairs. But I'm getting off topic, that universe as I mentioned has nothing to do with you!"
"Mom, you're so slow!" the kid sighed, "I wanna go to the mall!"
"We will go to the mall," Ludmila said very calmly, "You just have to be patient."
"She never raises her voice at her kid because she wants to do everything opposite from her own mother," Roxy explained.
"That makes sense," Violetta said. 
"While you go to the mall, I'm gonna go make some dinner for my two stars!" Federico said in a cheerful tone. Ludmila smiled at him. There was kind of a sadness in her smile, but it was there.
"They do have a happy marriage, they do," Roxy assured them, "But their kid definitely suspects Ludmila. I'm sure in a few years it's gonna be some drama with that. Anyway, wanna see who Naty ended up with?"
They teleported to a new place. Immediately, they saw Maxi and Naty together in the backyard of a house. They had two little children, one boy and one girl, running around. Naty sighed in relief.
"At least they don't destroy everything in our house now," Naty said. 
"Only our backyard," Maxi chuckled.
"Now, Naty is also closeted, but so is Maxi, so it's ok," Roxy explained. "And they have a decent life. They got twins a few years back. Wild little things, they like to run around a lot, Maxi and Naty are often exhausted. But hey, that's parenthood."
"So Maxi gets twins in every universe?" Francesca asked.
"Maxi does get twins in every universe, yes. In every other universe he has them with Andrés, but in this specific one, he has them with Naty."
"I'm still so surprised him and Andrés are gonna be a thing," Violetta chuckled. "But it also makes sense."
"They seem to be doing ok together," Francesca said, "But I still think Naty and Ludmila are happier together."
"Yeah, and Maxi and Andrés."
"Maybe in your universe," Roxy shrugged. "Despite what I've told you, we have only seen a small glimpse of their relationships. But I can tell you there's one relationship that I'm happy is only in this universe."
They teleported to Violetta's childhood house. 
"What are we doing here?"
Roxy put a hand on her shoulder. "Violetta... I don't know how I'm gonna put this in the best way... your aunt and your dad are married."
"What?!"
"Mhm. And you support it in this universe."
"I-"
"Wait..." Francesca said, "Do they have children?"
Roxy shook her head.
"That's a relief," Violetta said, "I can't imagine them... but also... poor Angie... she really wanted kids. But I can understand she doesn't want to have kids with dad."
"Let's look at a glimpse of their marriage life," Roxy said, teleporting them inside the house.
Germán sat on the couch, as Angie came inside with some tea.
"I decided to give you some tea while you work," she said gently.
"Thank you, Angie." Germán laid back, "Ough, could you give me a massage, too? My back really hurts."
"Of course." She smiled and started giving him a massage.
"Aaah! That's the spot! Ooh, you're so good at this, Angie! I love you!" He kissed her arm that was leaning over his shoulder. 
"I love you, too."
Violetta stared at this in disbelief. "I have to admit I had a dream they'd be together once... but that was before I really knew how bad my dad was and I just wanted Angie to stay with me forever. I don't care if they have a happy marriage or whatever, I don't... like it. I think it's weird! Am I a bad daughter?"
"Yes," Roxy said. "But it's ok, he's a bad father."
"He really is," Francesca said. Violetta stared at her. "What?" Francesca asked, "It's true!"
"But it might also be weird because I know just how happy she is with Pablo in our universe," Violetta said. "And they have their daughter... and Angie is happier than what I've ever seen her."
"Can we go to another universe?" Francesca asked.
"Sure! Let us spice it up!" Roxy exclaimed. "Now, how do you feel about polygamy?"
"Uh-"
"No time to speak, we're gonna travel now!"
-
They ended up in a large room. It appeared to be a party of some sorts.
"Who's birthday is it?" Violetta asked.
"It is very unclear," Roxy admitted. "It might not be a birthday at all, but just a gathering."
"Look! Naty and Ludmila are together with Stella again!" Francesca exclaimed, pointing at Naty holding baby Stella, as Ludmila was cooing at her.
"And Camila has Kim!" Violetta added, noticing Kim sitting on Camila's shoulders. They were happy to see their friends have their kids back.
They then noticed Maxi and Andrés leaning against each other in the corner.
"Oh, they're together?" Violetta asked.
Roxy nodded. "In this universe, they just got together, but the twins are not here yet! But the important thing here is you four over there."
They noticed this universe's version of Violetta, Francesca, Diego and Leon stand over at a table. Violetta and Francesca were holding two girls that appeared to be their separate daughters at home. 
"I wanna say right off the bat, that's not Isadora and Diana," Roxy explained.
"Why?" Francesca asked.
"Because Isadora and Diana can never be siblings. Neither can Stella and Kim."
"Why not?" Violetta asked. "And what do you mean with siblings?"
"When your daughters turn into teenagers, something will happen with their relationship that would make any other universe very weird if they were siblings. And about that... these two girls you see in front of you were conceived with the ones you are married to in your universe... but they have other names here, and while they aren't biologically siblings, they... are."
"Hold up, what?" Francesca asked, feeling super confused. 
Roxy formed a mischievous grin. "Violetta, do you notice that you're pregnant?"
Violetta looked down on herself and frowned. "What?"
"No, not you, the other you! This universe's you!"
Indeed. This universe's Violetta handed over the toddler she had carried to Leon, and the second she did, you could see her bump. 
"Me and Leon are gonna get another baby?" Violetta asked.
"Not you and Leon. You and Diego."
Violetta stopped her tracks. "But... who's the black haired toddler that Francesca is carrying?"
"That's also Diego's."
"You lost us," Francesca said. 
"Remember when I asked you how you felt about polygamy? Well, in this universe, the four of you got very close on your trip to Madrid that one time... and you became so inseparable that you all four decided to date each other!" 
"Uh..." 
"None of you are married, that is still illegal. But you wanted to start a family, so you got yourself two kids, paired up Violetta and Leon and Diego and Francesca. But now, you're ready for a third, and so Diego decided to try mixing his genes with Violetta. Who knows if you get a fourth mixing Leon and Fran's, that all depends on how much you can handle three children."
"I..." Violetta tried to figure out how to react to this. "... ok..."
"As long as we're happy...?" Francesca said, raising an eyebrow. 
Roxy lit up. "Oh, if you say that, you're gonna love the next universe we're visiting! I call it the 'nothing-is-the-same-as-any-other-universe-universe'!"
-
They arrived in a living room. Violetta looked out the window. "Huh. We're in Madrid...?"
"Yes, you live here now," Roxy said. 
"Okay... why, and also with who?"
"You live here with your husband who missed his home country so much, and you were happy to move here for him!"
Right then, this universe's Violetta came in with groceries. She turned around. "Come on, can't you help me carry at least one bag?"
"They're so heavy!" a whiny voice replied.
Violetta and Francesca stiffened. They recognized that voice. It sounded like Sniff from the Moomins, but more a much darker voice. 
Out came Tomas, and gave Violetta a kiss on the cheek. ”Can you be a dear and get the rest of the grocery bags?”
”Okay,” This universe-Violetta playfully rolled her eyes. 
”How did I end up with Tomas?” Violetta asked.
”Well, you never forgot about him after he moved, and he never forgot about you either,” Roxy said as she wiggled her eyebrows. ”You kept in contact and eventually started dating… and now, here you are!”
”Do we have kids?”
”You don’t. It’s not that you don’t want them, but making them is hard, because Tomas has a tendency to… finish quickly?” 
Both women scrunched their faces up and shook their heads as they waved their hands around. 
”Thanks, I don’t wanna hear!” Violetta exclaimed.
”Why not, it’s your husband!”
”My husband is Leon and he’s the only one I can picture be a father to my children!”
”Is he the same as Tomas in bed?”
Violetta went silent for a moment, not sure if she would share such intimate details. Then she remembered Francesca practically knew everything as the two of them talked about intimate subjects a lot, and Roxy was this weird all-knowing universe bender. ”I’ll have you know Leon knows exactly how to satisfy both me and himself. Thank you.”
This universe’s Violetta came back upstairs with the last of the groceries.
”You can at least put them where they’re supposed to be,” she told him, ”I’m gonna go shower.”
As she left, Tomas started packing up the groceries. Right away however, they noticed he was putting things all wrong. Things supposed to be in the fridge was put in the cupboard, he put apples in the freezer for some reason, and just left it very disorganized.
”He’s doing it on purpose so that he doesn’t have to do it in the future, because you’d think he’d ’only do it wrong’,” Roxy explained.
”Lazy ass fuck,” Francesca mumbled. Everyone turned to her, as she usually didn’t swear. ”What? Let me!” 
”I’m annoyed,” Violetta admitted, ”Why does me in this universe stay with him?”
”Because you love him in this universe,” Roxy said. ”When you come out of the shower, you’re gonna go give him a massage because you love him so much.”
”Oh my god, I’m Angie in the universe where she’s with my dad! Quick, can we go see where Francesca is instead?”
”Sure thing!” Roxy snappad her fingers and suddenly they were in a new living room. This time, in what appeared to be Milano. Francesca was cuddling with someone on the couch.
Walking forward for further inspection, it appeared to be Marco.
”Marco?” Francesca asked, surprised. ”I married Marco in this universe?”
”Yes,” Roxy said. ”You never broke up. As Marco went to London, you wanted to be closer to him, and thus moved back to Italy. You had your singing career here, and as he was done with his studies, he moved her with you and now you’re married and go on vacations with Violetta and Tomas around Europe.” 
”Aww,” Francesca said, ”Well, that’s nice. Except I’m still skeptical about Tomas, but otherwise than that, it’s nice.”
”Imagine if I had ended up with Clement,” Violetta joked.
”You never will or have in any universe,” Roxy said, ”There was never a chance you and Clement ever would be romantically involved.”
”I’m guessing me and Marco don’t have kids,” Francesca said. 
”Well, check yourself.”
Francesca checked her alternate-universe counterpart and noticed that there was a bump sticking out from her. She gasped.
”I’m pregnant!” 
”You are,” Roxy said, ”Congrats!”
Francesca wasn’t sure she was supposed to say thanks, considering it wasn’t her that was pregnant, but it was still her from another universe, so it was her.
”Marco, can you get me a soda?” this-universe Francesca asked.
Marco got up. ”Anything for my princess!”
”He’s still a Ken to your Barbie,” Roxy remarked. ”But hey! You might wanna know what happened to your husbands from your own universe!” 
She snapped her fingers. They were now in Buenos Aires, in some garage. Diego and Leon were sitting down on a couch, holding a beer each. 
”What do you say we rehearse later?” Leon asked. ”After I walk the dog.” 
”If I have the energy,” Diego chuckled.
”You have the energy, you’re just lazy.”
”I’m not lazy!” 
”You are. You are so lazy!” After Leon said this, he gave Diego a quick peck.
”Ooooh…” Violetta said, ”They are ones married to each other this time.”
”Correct,” Roxy said. "Since you were so busy with Tomas, Diego spent more time with Leon than with you, which lead to them having a relationship and also lead to Francesca staying with Marco! But I don’t really know how all events led up to each other, but I guess it can make sense…”
Violetta and Francesca nodded. 
”Leon and Diego don’t have kids, but they do have dogs! And they’re planning on getting a parrot, too.”
”I have a weird question,” Violetta said, ”Is there any universe which Diego and Marco are together?”
”According to my device, they are together in the same universe as Priscila marrying a woman named Sharon. Possibly other universes too, but it won’t load. Anyway, that universe also has Angie being together with Jade and Ludmila and Camila being together.”
”Who’s Angie with in this universe?” Violetta asked.
”Jackie.”
”Our old dance teacher?” Francesca asked.
”Yes. Also, in this universe, Naty and Camila are together. Should we go meet them?”
"Sure...?"
They teleported to a kitchen. Immediately, they saw Naty stand by the stove, cooking something. 
"Mami!" someone shouted. A little child soon came running inside. It was a little girl, but it was not Stella. 
"Dinner is ready soon," Naty assured the child. 
"Guess who woke up from their nap early!" Camila said, making her announcement by saying that. She was carrying a little baby.
"Did you?" Naty joked. "Good thing the baby woke you up!"
Camila went up and kissed her. "What's for dinner?"
"It's a surprise."
"CHICKEN NUGGETS?!" the little girl exclaimed.
"No, not chicken nuggets," Naty laughed.
"I want chicken nuggets!"
"Tomorrow," Camila promised.
"'Morrow?"
"You'll get nuggets tomorrow."
The little girl seemed happy with this promise. 
"They might get a third child eventually," Roxy explained, "And even a fourth. The universe has not decided that yet."
"What a cute little family they have," Violetta said. "I know both Naty and Camila are great mothers from our own universe, so I'm happy they still are here."
"Yeah, even if it's weird not seeing Naty with Ludmila..." Francesca admitted.
"Yeah, where is Ludmila?"
Roxy tried to look it up on her device. "It... doesn't say."
"It doesn't say?"
"No... maybe the universe has not decided what she's up to."
"What does that even mean?" Francesca asked. "Does that mean she... doesn't exist in this universe?"
"No, no! She does exist! It's just that we don't know what she's up to or if she's with someone. She might not be with anyone! She might be single! She might be with Broduey, it doesn't say what he's up to either."
”I doubt Ludmila is with Broduey,” Violetta admitted.
”Ok, you’re right. In this universe, she’s either single or with another woman. We don’t know.”
”May I ask,” Francesca said, ”Any of these pairings we’ve witnessed here… do they exist in any other universe?” 
”Yes. There’s a lot of universes that mixes these together. We for example have universe 22 where you two are married, as well as Naty and Camila AND Diego and Leon. I don't know why this is called the universe in which nothing in the same as the others, maybe because there's not two or more pairings that both is the same in another universe?”
”Why are some universes numbered and others have a title?” Violetta asked. 
”Don’t question it. There’s also a universe in which you and everyone you know are a part of a tv show and are played by actors, and then people in their 20s write fanfiction about you!” 
”I have decided to not question anything anymore…” 
”And then those people in their 20s who write fanfiction about you are fictional characters in one of your universes and you might write fanfiction about them!”
Roxy then stared right at you, the reader, and smiled as she asked you: ”Which character would you want to write fanfiction about you?”
-
As they entered the white void that was in between all the universes, Roxy took the women’s hands.
”We’re soon gonna travel back to your universe again. But before I need to ask you: Did you see any similarities between the universes?”
”Well…” Violetta said, ”I don’t know…” 
”I’m gonna give you a hint: In every universe, there was a couple that always remained, and never changed, not even in the nothing-is-the-same-as-any-other-universe-universe.”
”What?” Francesca said. Both her and Vilu tried to recount all the different universes. Some had the same couples as the previous, but not all of them. 
”No, I’m lost,” Violetta admitted. ”Please, who is it?”
Roxy smirked. ”It’s two that you seem to have forgotten about. Makes sense, you only hung out with them for a year and then seemed to move on from them. But they were there…”
”Huh? Who?”
”Braco and Napo!”
"Braco and Napo?" Vilu and Fran exclaimed in unison. 
"Are they together?" Francesca asked. "I mean, I always had a feeling about Napo being gay, but Braco?"
Roxy shook her head and tutted disapprovingly. "You clearly have not kept in contact with them."
"No... I guess we haven't," Violetta admitted. "They're dating in our universe, too?"
"Yes. And in the universe where you two are married, and in every other universe! There's always them!"
"But how come they're an exception to the rules?" Francesca asked.
"Think about it, Fran... when you picture Napo or Braco with anyone... who do you picture?"
"Uh... I guess... I don't really... have thought about it."
"Exactly. In the universe in where you are fictional characters in a tv show, Braco and Napo disappeared after one season."
"Did they do that because we lost contact with them in our universe?"
"Probably. Oh well! We're back in your universe now!"
-
They were back in Violetta's kitchen.
"We're back to our universe?" Violetta asked.
"We need to get our kids," Francesca said, "We've been away for such a long time..."
"No, no time has passed at all in your universe," Roxy assured them. 
"I feel very odd," Violetta admitted.
"Yes, you feel that after seeing yourself living in different universes. And we didn't even visit all of them! Did I tell you about the one where you changed your name to Tini?"
"Why did I do that?"
"No one knows."
"Can I ask you something?" Francesca asked, "My brother Luca. In this universe we're in, he's not with anyone, nor has he any kids. Does he in any universe?"
"Yes, in several of the ones we visited! But I forgot that you'd be interested in that," Roxy admitted.
"Oh... okay..."
"Maybe next time!"
"Maybe next time, yes..." 
Roxy put her arms up in the air. "Well! I better go!"
"Where are you going?" Violetta asked.
"I'm sensing someone else needs some universe-travelling... in another universe."
"I see..."
"But it was very fun hanging out with you!" Roxy exclaimed and shook both of their hands at the same time.
"I'm just surprised that you even exist," Violetta said, "Considering you're my alter ego in this universe..."
"I'm your alter ego in a lot of universes! It's your fault, or your credit, that I exist as my own person in my own universe!"
Violetta stared at her, slightly confused. "How does it look in your own universe?"
Roxy shrugged, "I live in a universe where alter egos exist and always have existed! We are not born, we just come into existence as the age we were when we were created. Our universe is just a void that bends and changes, which is why we like to travel to other universes!"
"Ok, makes sense..." Violetta wasn't sure it made sense, but she was just too dazed by everything she just decided to accept it. 
"I need to go now!" Roxy said. "Goodbye!" 
She jumped and with a pop, she was gone.
"I wanna travel through universes again sometimes," Francesca said, "I wanna know what Luca's doing."
"Yes, although it feels weird to see us being with other people and having other children..."
"Yeah... wait, what were we talking about?"
"What?"
"What?"
What Roxy didn't tell them was that, as soon as you come back from a multiverse trip, you soon forget all of it. 
Maybe it was for the good, because you could easily get driven insane by knowing what you did in other universes...
Violetta and Francesca in universe 1 just thought they had been tasting a wine they friend had made, and that Roxy was simply a character Violetta came up with. They thought their daughters were children they had with Leon and Diego respectively, and forgot all about universe 2, in which they instead were the ones married and had three children of their own. Violetta never remembered visiting the universe where she was married to Tomas instead, and Francesca never remembered seeing herself in that other universe married with Marco and expecting a child with him. And none of the two remembered the universe in which, instead of being married to Leon and Diego separately, they had a polyamorous relationship with them.
They didn't remember their friends being together with anyone else than who they currently were and weren't together with. 
And all the Francescas and Violettas from all the other universes had no idea either that things were different. They all lived their lives happily unaware. 
Although, despite forgetting everything, Violetta and Francesca from this universe would always and forever have this feeling that they were going through something, but they can't remember what... and they would wonder that for the rest of their lives.
-
Camila, or her witch aunt, did not only cast a spell on the wine. One of them also cast a spell on the text you're reading right now. Don't ask me how they did that. 
Roxy is coming for you right now. You should be lucky the universe you're in is one of the few in which teleportation is illegal, because otherwise she'd appear directly next to you.
She just landed 100 meters from your location. She's running. Lock your doors if you're at home, and if you're not, then... have fun on your multiverse trip! You won't remember much of it anyway when you're done!
You could make it a drinking game every time "universe" is written... /j So, as I mentioned in the beginning notes, in my fics I only keep it in two universes, where the only difference is if Franletta or Leonetta + Diecesca is canon, and all other ships remain the same. The plan was that they'd just visit each other between these two, but then I decided to go completely chaos with it. A long time ago, I tried to figure out next gens for many of the canon ships, and it was those that showed up in the "canon ships" universe. The other universes were just me toying around. And there's probably hundreds of universes left... I don't have next gens for that many ships, so many of these were either "IF this ship had kids, this is how I could picture it", or "this ship would not have kids together". The only actual next gens I have are the ones that are mentioned by name. I also mentioned some ideas I've had about writing someday, like "the universe where Violetta is not relevant" ;) We'll see if I write it someday. Hope you liked this fic! Also, Roxy is by your door now. If you have it locked, she'll leave soon. If you see her or open the door, she'll come in, but the second your trip through different universes where you live your life differently ends, you'll forget it all, and it will just feel like a repressed memory that you can't recall.
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starseneyes · 10 months
Text
Goodbye Cheryl Anne Marek 1984-2023
If you've been around for a while, you've probably seen me talk about my dear friend Cheryl in my Metas. Well, this morning, she lost her fight with cancer after a 5 year battle.
Under the cut is what I wrote on other Socials to remember her... not by how she died, but how she lived.
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CHERYL UPDATE: At 1AM, my beautiful friend left this mortal plane.
I've had so much time to prepare, you'd think I'd be impenetrable, but I admit I'm aching knowing she's gone.
For 5 years, she battled terminal cancer. But I want to share a few memories of how she lived.
Cheryl and I met when we were 11. Gifted kids, both of us. We shared most our Middle School classes.
Middle School was an adventure that we all survived together. Cheryl and I were always friends, even if I don't think either of us would have considered each other a best friend at that point.
We shared a lot of the same friends, so it was natural we hung out together.
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By high school, we were both in the chorus. I tried track Freshman year, but there was a snag.
Despite Mom working 18hr days as a film/tv hair & makeup artist, she couldn't afford to give me money for dinner out after track meets.
I babysat, but couldn't earn fast enough.
When I told Cheryl why I had to quit, she offered to pay for my dinners the rest of the year.
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It was $7 once a week to Sonic, but to me it was an overwhelmingly kind gift. I wanted to turn it down, but something in me said to accept.
That was Cheryl's first gift.
After Sophomore year, I moved to Virginia. We didn't see each other for nearly a decade until she moved to Virginia—a half hour from me.
We started hanging out, again. Cheryl wanted to do a Fun Run, but I was strapped for cash. She gifted it to me. Another gift.
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I had three kids, and when the Littlest was not even a year, I was laid off. I built my freelance career bit by bit, but that first year was tough.
Cheryl saw the strain and took me for dollar tacos every Wednesday. Sometimes the baby joined and flirted with other tables.
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I hosted chili cook-offs and game nights, and lots of other fun over the next few years.
Cheryl was diagnosed with esophageal cancer and given 2% odds of living a year.
She missed her commissioning as a Civil Engineer in the military by three weeks. Her Cancer battle began.
The short version is that she beat it… then was diagnosed, again, then beat it, again.
We saw each other as much as her schedule of treatments and trips allowed. You see, Cheryl didn't let Cancer stop her.
She went skiing, ice climbing, adventuring, and built memories.
Cheryl came on a camping trip with me that Matt couldn't make. We had SO much fun… until my Eldest nearly knocked out 4 teeth.
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As I sped down the mountain she made calls. When asked how long we'd be, she said, "It won't take long. Rachel's driving like a bat outta hell".
We tried an RV trip together, once (LONG story), and the kids had a marvelous time out on the water with Aunt Cheryl.
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One of the last good times before Cancer came back a third time. And still, as she was fighting to finish her Doctorate (she did) and finding ways to help those she loved.
The biggest gift Cheryl gave me was a friend who understood me. She got me. And I got her.
Talking to Cheryl, she understood my drive. My passion. How I'd forget to take care of myself while taking care of others.
Because she was the same way. We were two of a kind.
Our last text exchange was one of gratitude and love. I only hope with all that Cheryl gave me, I gave her something precious in return. Because, golly, I loved her.
Rest in peace, Cheryl Anne Marek. Your fight is over. Your legacy will live on. And I will always love you.
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chilly-me-softly · 2 years
Note
Hey love you mason dad series have you considered what it would be like at matches and training with the kid x
Hi! Thank you 🥰 In the end it came out as a Mason reflection about matches and training, but anyway I also plan to write something with an actual training/match day. In the meantime though I hope you like it x
"I quit" silence fell in the room, everyone looking at him as if he had suddenly grown another head. He knew that dinner wasn't meant to be about spending time together as usual, they've been discussing the same thing for days now. Everyone worrying about his future, about how to help both of them by keeping up with his schedule when by eliminating the source of so much stress everything would disappear. Everything would be easier.
"What?"
"Well yeah, I have enough money to raise Alice properly until she goes to school. Then I'll do other stuff... I guess - I don't know" he looks impatient, as if none of that touches him in the slightest, when in fact he has a pain in his chest that gives him no peace.
"Mason you're delusional" his mother is already prepared to reason with him but he quickly stops her.
"I'm not!" the cutlery jumps slightly and the bottles wobble from the fists hitting the table hard - "I'm fine. I've made my decision... end of story" his tone drops at the end as he gets up from the table causing his chair to scrap against the floor. And the woman signals for everyone to let him go, they all know where he is headed.
-
"You're my little baby, my little mounty, yes you are" Mason leaves a kiss on the little girl's forehead inhaling her baby smell, the shadow of a smile on her face as she snoozes in his arms. "Daddy won't let you down, he will always be with you"
"You're right, you shouldn't let her down. But don't you think that will happen when you teach her that it's okay to give up at the first opportunity?!"
"How can I do that if I'm always away?" the boy sighs defeatedly as he sits on the rocking chair in the room looking at the little girl in his arms.
"Just... don't make any rash decisions, okay? Take some time to think about it"
"Mom she's my daughter. I don't want her living with her grandparents, with her aunts and uncles... anyone but me"
"Mason, let us help you - the woman lays a hand on her son's shoulder - This is a particular time, both for you and for her, and you need all the help you can get. The time will come when you will be able to cope on your own, but it's not now. So stop feeling guilty"
-
Eventually Mason took his mum's advice and thought about it. Very hard, to the point of not sleeping at night. Nine times out of ten the right choice is to hang up his shoes and take care of his daughter. Right, except it wasn't what he wanted. Ugh was he selfish if he didn't want to give up his dream?
He had cried after being honest with himself. In the darkness of his room he had felt so fragile and in need of someone to hold him and remind him that everything would be alright. But he was alone, there was no one there for him and he had suddenly realised on his skin what it would be like from then on. It was going to be up to him to pick himself up out of the dark times, pull himself together and sort out all the crap; him and no one else to share all that weight with.
That night however had triggered something inside him and despite not having had much rest, he had wrapped the baby to his chest in the early morning and headed for the training ground. Determined to discuss a good solution to everything and above all to manage on his own.
They had been quite helpful, saying that he could bring the little girl to the facility any time he needed to. There were some really capable and helpful people there and then it happened to everyone from time to time to have to take their children with them and they certainly didn't interrupt training every time.
He was determined to be as professional as possible, try not to get too distracted by everything. After all, he too needed time to wrap his head around that new reality and let his mind and heart heal above all. And if at first he had started to take her with him every day, then he had started to let his mother or sister take care of her, not wanting to take advantage of those people's helpfulness.
Gradually he had learned to manage his time, his emotions and to let go and build a routine in the new life that lay ahead of them from now on. When he was in training he had to have his mind on the next game, on the next goal, while when he was with his little girl he could devote as much time to her as she needed.
Only on one thing had he been adamant, coming to terms with the fact that he would need a big hand from his family. He had begged them to bring Alice to every one of his home games. It didn't matter if she was still too young at the time, it was for him. Seeing her there every time served to remind him that they were making it, that all the sacrifices and late nights had a purpose.
Seeing her smile in his mother's arms first and run towards him then, each game made him realise more and more how much she was growing and above all that they were both doing well.
Little Mounty
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hope-m11 · 3 months
Text
𝙵𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍 𝙻𝚘𝚟𝚎
Chapter 16
It's New Year's Eve, my family has gone to celebrate, after a long time reassuring me that I can manage on my own. I haven't seen Tom since the day before yesterday, when I told him about the pregnancy he was understanding and told me that I didn't have to go through this alone. To be honest, that wasn't the reaction I expected from him, but I think it had something to do with my father giving him a sermon beforehand. I can hear the neighborhood counting down, I count along quietly. And as the New Year dawns, I stroke the little bump that's starting to form.
"I promise you that I will love you no matter what." I wipe away my tears. "I also promise you that I will take care of both of us. You have people around you who already love you.”
Poppy cuddles on my stomach and sighs contentedly. My phone vibrates, I pick it up from my bedside table, my brothers call me on FaceTime.
“Happy New Year Jersey” they shout loudly, I have to turn the volume down.
,,Happy New Year." I say and smile. "Where are Mum and Dad?"
"They make out like they're teenagers." Harry says, scrunching up his face in disgust.
,,Very embarrassing." Paddy's face turns red as he shows me our parents making out.
"Hey Jersey." Zendaya appears on the screen. ,,Happy New Year."
,,I wish you a happy new year, too." I say and I can tell from her look that Tom has told her about the pregnancy and she will talk to me later. We both understand each other that way too. So I nod my head and she does the same.
After we chatted for a bit, I got tired and fell asleep straight away. But if I'm woken up by my cell phone without opening my eyes, I fumble for it and answer the call.
,,Hello?" My voice sounds rough from sleeping.
"Aleia, I'm Briar Rose... I can't see you."
I immediately sat up and startled Poppy, I took the phone away from my ear and Briar Rose was sitting in her room. My chest tightens when I see her sad look.
,,What's up?" I ask.
"It's... I just miss you and Poppy so much." She wipes a tear from the corner of her eye.
My eyes fill with tears too. "I miss you too Briar Rose." Poppy jumps on me and when she sees Briar Rose on the phone she starts barking.
Briar Rose and I talk for a while, she tells me about Christmas and I tell her about mine and then what she did today and I tell her what I did. When she hears her mother's voice, she grabs her cell phone under the pillow and leaves. I'm out because I can't hear her or her mother anymore. And since I didn't want to hang up without saying goodbye to her, I waited for the screen to flip back over. I put my phone away from me and try to find a better position to find a bed. When I look back at the phone in front of me, Briar Rose is even sadder than before.
,,I have to go." she says. "I told my mom I was talking to a friend on the phone. You’re my girlfriend… Aren’t you?”
I nod. "Of course I'm your girlfriend." I say. “Is that your number?”
She nods. "Yes, Daddy bought me a cell phone." Her eyes shine.
“Okay sweetie, then sleep well.”
“You too Aleia.” she says. "Goodnight Poppy." Poppy barks.
When she hung up, I sobbed so hard that Poppy licked my tears away. After about an hour I fell asleep from exhaustion. And I don't wake up until I throw up. Morning sickness is killing me. April told me that it stayed with her until the third month of her pregnancy. Once I've washed my face and brushed my teeth, I sit on the bar stool and eat breakfast. I look at my friends and family’s stories on Instagram. When I get a message from April, I push the plate away. It's a picture of Abel smiling sweetly in his Mickey Mouse suit and matching hat that I bought. Misses his aunt. I have to smile, then I guess I miss them both terribly too.
After breakfast I decided that a walk would be good, so I dressed up as it was still very cold outside.
,,Where do you want to go?" Paddy is standing in front of me.
,,Stroll." I say and put on my boots.
,,I'm coming with you." He starts to get dressed, but I stop him.
"If you don't mind, I'd like to go for a walk alone."
He looks at me worried. I tiptoe and place a kiss on his cheek. "I'm fine, Paddy Bear." I open the front door and the cold air greets me. I walk around London, grab something to eat, go to the library, buy some new books and chat to a few fans who have recognized me. I sign the books I bought, take a few photos and then walk back home. As I walk home, I think about the fact that now that I'm pregnant, I should buy my own little house. So I decide that when I lie in my bed, I will immediately look for houses, preferably not that far away from my parents.
                                        ***
I spent the next three weeks looking for houses, but nothing I liked or was close to my parents, so I gave up looking. I wait patiently in the gynecologist's examination room when she comes with a smile and starts to smear gel on my stomach and then shows me my baby on the monitor. I keep crying. Unfortunately, my mother couldn't be there today because she has an important appointment that she couldn't cancel. I'm not mad at her, otherwise she always accompanied me. I just stare at the monitor and am beside myself with joy.
"So Miss Holland next week you'll be in your first month." says the doctor.
After a bit of conversation with the doctor, I go home and squeeze onto the couch next to my brothers. You are watching an action movie. Tom silently hands me the popcorn, I accept it gratefully and start stuffing popcorn into my mouth. I wake up to the smell of chicken, Sam is standing in the kitchen with his apron on, when he turns to me I laugh so hard. It says on his apron. The best uncle in the world. When Paddy comes into the kitchen, he is wearing a T-shirt with the same slogan as Sam's apron. Harry is wearing a cap with the same inscription and Tom comes into the kitchen wearing a T-shirt, just a different color.
"When did you make these?" I laugh and wipe the tears from my eyes.
"After you told us about the pregnancy." Say it all together.
"But just to make it clear," says Tom and grins mischievously. "I'll be the coolest uncle among us."
,,Why that?" Paddy asks in horror.
"Because I'm Spider-Man." says Tom.
My brothers got into a discussion. While I'm putting food on my plate, the chicken looks so delicious. I put the plate on the dining table and pull out the chair, sit on it and take a sip of the water before I start eating the chicken. The discussion was still going on until my parents finished it when they came into the kitchen from outside.
“It doesn’t matter who will be the coolest or the best uncle.” My dad looks at my brothers. "Because I'm the coolest and best Grandpa."
My mother rolls her eyes. "I beg you, I will be the coolest and best Nana."
“Nana?” We all turn to her.
She nods. "Yes, Nana."
My brothers try to suppress their laughter. I go to my mother and give her a kiss on the cheek. My heart swells as my family speaks in a gentle tone about what they want to do with the baby. It's not a lie when I say I have the best family and my baby will have uncles and grandparents who already love him.
We make ourselves comfortable in the living room, our mother tells us about the photo shoot she took today and they were happy customers. My father tells us about the book he is currently writing. When tiredness gets the best of me, I wish everyone a good night and go to sleep.
                                       ***
When I thought I had given up looking for houses, I forgot that I had previously written to an agent. Now I'm standing in front of the house, which is only 8 houses away from my parents and you can easily walk to them. The real estate agent parks her car and then comes up to me with a huge smile.
“It’s nice that we’re finally getting to know each other in person.” Her whole face is really beaming. "I'm a big fan of her books."
I smile politely at her. ,,I am happy to hear that."
She opens the front door for me after we climb the porch stairs. The first thing the house shows is a long hallway and stairs. To get to the living room you have to walk a little more, the living room is large. And when we reach the kitchen my mouth drops open, it's a medium kitchen that has a great view of the garden. I imagine my baby playing outside in the garden and I smile. When the real estate agent wants to show me the bedroom, we go up the stairs. The first bedroom turns out to be one with a bathroom inside. The second is a guest bedroom which also has a small bathroom. The third and final room is a slightly smaller room than the others, but you could still fit a lot into it. And suddenly I see the cot, the changing table, the little cupboard with the little clothes and shoes in it. And the rocking chair by sitting on it and stroking his or her hair while watching their eyes close. Without realizing it, I put a hand on my stomach. The real estate agent keeps talking, I can't really listen to her anymore, I'm too overwhelmed by this house.
                                         ***
My parents were sad when I told them about my move, but their mood changed a bit when I told them that I'm only 8 houses away from them and I won't be moving in there until next month. My mother helped me choose furniture for the house. I ordered the things for the baby's room in a neutral color. I'm watching some TikToks on my phone and my For You is full of Hayden. I shouldn't be interested, but I still scroll down and watch his videos. I miss his smile and his grin. His wonderful blue eyes and how they shine when he tells me something. But I don't want to wallow in self-pity or mourn Hayden anymore, so I step out of TikTok and pick up my laptop and start writing a book. Later, when I look out the window, it's already dark and I look at the time on my laptop and widen my eyes. I sat for 3 hours just writing. When my phone pings and shows me that April has sent me a new photo of Abel, I smile. Abel is such a sweet baby who always makes such funny faces when April takes a selfie with him.
The story is also available on Wattpad.
Name: @Hopeee_m11
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Text
Title: A Day With Matt and Gabby
Age: 2
TW: none
A/N In this story, Gabby and Matt are married.
Jay's pov
Time 9:30 A.M.
Intelligence just caught a big case, so I am going to see if Catie can go to the firehouse asking. She would be at her daycare right now if half of it didn't burn down because of the restaurant beside it that caught on fire. I pull out my phone and look for Matts number and call him. It takes him about 3 rings before he answers, "Hey, what's up."We just caught a big case, and I need someone to watch Catie." I say. "Yeah, of course. Just bring her over to the firehouse." He says. I breathe a sigh of relief and say, "Alright, thank you so much. I'm sorry I would take her to her daycare, but you know."It's no problem, really. You and Catie are family, and we take care of family." Thanks again, bye," Bye," he says and hangs up. I waited for Voight to stop debriefing us, and when they were fixing to leave, I say. "Hey, I'm going to take Catie over to 51, and I'll meet you at the scene." He nods, and they head out. I walk into the break room, and Catie runs up to me and hugs my legs. "Daddy," She says. I walk around, grabbing her bag and her bear. As I say, "You want to go hang out with your aunts and uncles at the firehouse."Yeah, yeah, go see Aunt Gabby and Uncle Matt," she says while bouncing up and down, and I finish grabbing all her stuff, throwing her bag over my shoulder. I smile at how cute she is and walk over and pick her up, and we walk out to the car. I opened the back drives side door and put Caitlin in her car seat and buckled her in, and sat her bag beside her. I then got in myself and buckled. I started the drive to the firehouse, which isn't far from the district. I smiled as I listened to Caitlin quietly singing a song while looking out the window. When we got there, I texted Matt telling him we're here. A few minutes later, as I was getting Catie out of her car seat, Matt and a few others came out to see us. I grabbed her bag and walked over, and Matt took her bag and I say "If I'm not back when you're shift is over just take her back to your place and I'll pick her up there if that's okay." Yeah, that's fine. I'll text you when we leave so you know I'm home," he said. I nodded and looked at Catie, who was playing with the chain on my badge. I called her name and said, "Catie, I've got to go to work, so you're going to stay with Matt and the other firefighters, ok?" She nodded and said, "Otay, Daddy, wove you." I love you too," I said and kissed her forehead. I was going to pass her to Matt, but Gabby quickly reached out for her, so I handed her to Gabby then walked back to the truck to get her car seat, and handed it to Matt. I said bye to everyone, then got in my car and drove to meet up with intelligence.
Matt's pov
Time skip 1:30 P.M.
We just finished lunch and are cleaning the dishes when we get called out to a scene. It's nothing major. A kid just got his head stuck in the railing of a staircase. We got him out, and he was fine. Catie was standing on the side of the firetruck with Cap, watching us help the kid, and I could catch certain things that he was saying to her. With what I heard him say, I quickly figured out he was explaining what we were doing. We quickly finished up, and Gabby and Sylvie took the boy and his mother to med to look at the small cut on the boys neck while the rest of us headed back to the firehouse. When we got back, I took Caitlin up to the sleeping quarters. I grabbed her blanket and her police bear out of her bag. I really need to get her a firefighter bear. I sit down on one of the beds with her in my arms. She has one arm holding onto my shirt, and her bear tucked safely in her arms. I start softly humming so she'll fall asleep for her nap. I give her about 30 minutes to fall asleep fully before I lay her down on the bed and cover her with her blanket, her bear still in her arms. I set an alarm on my phone for 30 min to go and check on her.
Time skip
Caitlin woke up an hour after I layed her down for a nap. When she woke up, we played some, and we had a few calls, but now it's time to go back home.
Time skip 5:30 - 8:30 P.M.
While I get all her stuff together, Gabby takes her and puts her in the car. When I finish grabbing all her stuff, I walk out to the car and get in, and we head to my apartment. I already texted Jay and told him we are headed home, and he said alright. When we get home, we get out and go inside. Once we get inside, Caitlin is looking around at everything. She looks at the pictures in the living room. She walks into the halway, so I follow her so she doesn't get hurt, and Gabby goes into the kitchen to make dinner. She gets to the end of the hall where my bedroom is along with the guest bedroom and bathroom. The laundry room is at the beginning of the hallway. She turns into the guest bedroom and starts to look around until she spots a few pictures of different people. People from Med, PD, and Fire. She ran over and stopped just far enough so she could see them. I picked her up and walked closer so she could see them. She looked at them all with a big smile. After she looked at all the pictures and asked a lot of questions, she started squirming, trying to get down. I put her down, and she ran out into the kitchen. I laugh and shake my head and follow after her. I sit her bag on the kitchen counter. Caitlin comes over and reaches for her bag. I picked her up and sat her on my lap. I opened her bag, and she reached in and grabbed her small bag of toys. She opened it up and grabbed out a few toys, and handed me some, and we started playing. We played for a couple of minutes, and Gabby said, "Dinners ready. Matt, can you get the plates and silverware, please," Yeah, Catie, do you want to help me," I ask before standing up she nods and I sit her down on the floor and she runs into the kitchen. She gets distracted by the pictures hanging on the fridge. She pointed at one and said, "Dat you and Daddy," "Yeah, and who's your Daddy holding," I asked, looking at her with a smile as she looks at the picture. "Me," she says excitedly. "Yeah, that was your first birthday. When you had your first birthday, your dad made sure you got a picture with everyone so he could give to them as a thank you." I said. I glanced up and saw Gabby staring at us with a smile. "You have one, too, Gabby," Catie asked her. "I do, and if you look in the background of mine, you can see your uncle Will making a face." Gabs said as she made a weird face, and Caitlin laughed. I grabbed the plates and the silver wear, and we sat down to eat. After dinner, Gabby headed off to take a shower, so I took Caitlin in the living room, and we played with her toys till Gabby got out and when she did we switched me getting a shower and her playing with Catie. After I got out of the shower, we sat on the couch and started watching a movie. About halfway through the movie, we could tell Catie was getting tired because she wouldn't let herself sit still, so Gabby grabbed her blanket and bear and took her into the guest bedroom and stayed with her till she fell asleep then went to bed herself.
Time skip 12:30 A.M.
I stayed up a little while watching whatever was on TV waiting for Jay to come pick her up. It's a good thing I don't have work today. When I got a text from him saying, "Sorry I'm texting you so late I thought I could get off soon but it looks like this case is going to run late so I will just pick her up tomorrow."It's fine. I don't have work tomorrow. She's been great. I had no problems getting her to take a nap, and she's asleep right now." I reply. "Good I was worried she would fight you on nap time. She loves bedtime but nap time is a whole different story." He said I looked up when I heard the floorboard creak and saw Caitlin with her bear in her hand rubbing her eyes. I stand up and walk towards her I crouch in front of her and ask, "What's wrong." "I had a bad dream." She said which mad me take notice of the tears stains on her face. "Do you want to talk about it." I asked. She shook her head and said, "Nuh-uh, I want my daddy." I pick Caitlin up and walk back to the couch and sit down with her in my lap. I text Jay and ask if he's on break. He replies, "yeah why is something wrong." "No nothings wrong Catie just had a nightmare and wants to see you." I replied, and about 2 minutes later, I got a FaceTime notification from Jay and I answered it. As soon as Caitlin saw him, her eyes lit up, and she smiled. "Daddy," She said. "Hi baby, you ok." Uh-huh, I miss you." I miss you too." I sat there and let them talk for about 20 minutes till Jay said, "Catie I've got to go back to work ok I'll see you later. Goodnight." Okay, goodnight love you." Love you too baby," Jay said before the call ended. I looked at Catie and said, "why don't you sleep with me and Gabby huh." Ok." I stand up with Catie in my arms and walk into my room and lay her in between me and Gabby and wait for her to fall asleep before falling asleep shortly after.
Time skip 8:30 - 10:30 A.M.
We all woke up 30 minutes ago and we are eating breakfast. Jay said he'd be here at 10:30, so we have an hour before he gets here. We have been playing for awhile now Jay just texted me and said he is on his way so Gabby and I are cleaning up Caitlin's toys with a little help from Caitlin. We finished picking up her toys and are now sitting on the couch when there's a knock. I open the door and see Jay I let him come in.
Jay's pov
I walk inside the apartment and Matt leads me to where Caitlin was. When she saw me, "Daddy, "she squealed and ran towards me. I crouched down, and she ran into my arms. I picked her up, and walked into the living room to say hi to Gabby we talked for about 20 minutes until I decided to take Caitlin back home. I have the rest of the week off so I'm going to spend time with Caitlin.
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deadsnothere · 2 years
Note
Hiii! Can you tell about what your monster prom/camp dr is like? I'm planning on shifting there for a while and it's so cool to see someone with the same intention!
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆ Monster P/C
Monster camp and Monster prom are very fun dr's to have, but can be very stressful sometimes and very triggering if you aren't careful with what you've scripted into them. Once that's out of the way your free to have as much fun with it as you want!
୧ ‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡ Changes?
my dr follows the plot line of both games but backwards. After a year at CHB with my adoptive father (chiron), I went to monster camp for the summer, and than spooky high for the school year after (although they are still two different dr's with different love story timelines)! I had previously gone to spooky highschool a year before meeting some new friends and having fun my freshman and sophomore year!
Something I did change was adding Zoe, Billzo, and Ranboo to monster camp! It's definitely not necessary but very fun. I also added different characters like Polly, Scott, and more who aren't in monster camp that I added just because their fun characters!
In both monster camp and prom there are a lot of triggering things that are a lot different to hear about than actually witness, Like no one want's to see what damien does daily but we're fine about laughing about it when playing the game! Now i've scripted things like "bl00d looks like water" or "kni7es look like pink baseball bats" just small things that will make it less fucked up to be in that reality! As well as things like "If commit ars0n no is hurt or d1e's" just small things that will maybe make you feel better or make you feel more comfortable in your dr!
୧ ‧₊˚ ☁️⋅ My dr!
I'm a child of Poseidon and half demon. My demon family didn't want me and of course Poseidon couldn't take care of me, So Chiron took me in! I grew up mostly in CHB, but when Chiron was able to take a break, we went to a house near Spooky high, which is about an hour away from CHB!
there was someone on my demon side who did visit often! she was my aunt and Chiron's good friend. She had a beach house in Maryland that I take my friend group down to almost every summer ever since she past.
Growing up in CHB I helped with a lot of quests. I went on the original quest with percy, annabeth, and grover. I fought in the war, I defeated Ares 1 on 1 and stole his sunglasses angering the god (Chiron was not happy about that one).
Currently I live alone in the house near Spooky high. Every new school year Chiron will come visit for the morning to send me off the school from the house with a kiss on the cheek and a good luck! Zoe, who's my best-friend in this dr, practically lives with me as well as her adoptive brother Billzo.
In school I'm head cheerleader, don't get caught skipping almost at all, and my dad is never called due to no phones in CHB, which leaves me to sign most of my own stuff. The people i hand out with mostly is Damien, Zoe, Billzo, Ranboo, and Polly. We hang out at party's, during lunch, or just when skipping.
˗ˏˋ •Ending• ˎˊ˗
Remember to make yourself comfortable in dr! That's one of the most important things. To make yourself more comfortable it'll be easier to enjoy your dr, unless you like the feeling of adrenaline like me, but genuinely please be careful! and shift safely people!
deadsnothere
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what-if-nct · 1 year
Note
(this is sneeze, i changed my mains layout and also i figured i didnt need to use anon mode because everyone knows who i am anyways-)
awwww your new profile picture is adorable!!! I love those idiots so much, when Shotaro called Xiaojun 'sunbaenim' and Xiaojun told him not be so polite I love them
I'm afraid im getting off kpop even tho Mark will always have a special place in my anus heart. I love that guy he's amazing. And adorable. I love the way he laughs at stupid shit because same. He has worsened my humor. I'll always love NCT and SHINee and Stray Kids (although i have drama with all three fandoms xD) (not everyone tho, but most online friends who're stays turned out to be toxic as hell, but well who knows do they think like that about me). Changbinnie will always be my cute little pie.
(Striped part in next paragraph contains gore)
I bought rangers apprentice and the tgcf books and i am obsessed. There even is a month for my favorite ship which is FengQing (Feng Xin x Mu Qing) which is January and I've participated with writing. I literally loved writing those stupid little drabbles. Mu Qing canonically has a habbit of rolling his eyes and its hilarious. Also theres this guy who literally eats bodies and hangs them in trees to fucking look cool and hes my favorite character help-
How have you been? I wish i had more words to send you except my stupid obsessions, I want to be a good friend, really. Please be okay, alright? I dont know why I say this but I'd always like care for you because you're too sweet. Sorry I'm sorry for not coming here often, I really am. I love you so so so much!!!
-sneeze
YOUR HEADER EXCUSE ME I LOVE ITTTT
Also someone commented on my first ao3 fic and I'm so fucking happy right now they were so nice help I'm gonna cryyyyy
Yes, I love Taro and Xiaojun so much it's the cutest picture of anyone ever! The header I had to I said Yuta's belly button piercing will return one day. Today is that day. Understandable. The kpop fandom is pretty toxic which is why it's just important to create a circle of people who you feel comfortable talking to and are chill and get you. I only really had one close friend who was into kpop. I have like three now! (Sorry I'm so annoying and suck at typing) And of course all of you guys! And honestly Stays kinda scare me. So I'll just be in my Stayzen corner. All other Stayzens please join. And that sounds like really cool. A little scary but cool. And im fine I did cry last night and this morning but I'm fine just had an issue with my hair. I had put in extensions the way I usually do it which is how it is on Instagram I think we follow each other there. But my aunt's friend wanted to fix it for me but she did it way to tight and I took it out last night and the front got pulled out from how tight it is. And I was so sad plus I don't like the color I dyed it red to match the extensions and I don't like it and I'm fighting the urge to buy green hair dye. Cause green will neutralize red. But I have to fade it first so it will get to a color I can dye over. And it's been a whole kerfuffle. But I'm fine. I'm a Leo so I'm dramatic over my hair. I'm okay. And thank you for caring about me. I have a horrible mindset of no one cares about me so it's nice being reminded there's people who do. I love you too. I hope you're doing well and you're having a good day.
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gardengobbo · 11 months
Text
My mother told me recently that when you get old you start loving gardening and birdwatching, at least that's what happened with my aunt.
And the more I think of it, the more I realize she's probably right. Except I'm like, 20-30 years early. But to be fair, I've felt like a grumpy old man since I was in high school, so I'm not that surprised.
I've literally never been good at gardening, nor did I ever enjoy it. When I first moved out of my childhood home, I took with me a bulb of a Stargazer Lily from the garden. They've always been my favorite flower. My partner and I moved into an apartment for our first place, so I'd planted it in a planter on the balcony. (Fun fact: Lily's are posionus to cats. So it wasn't being grown inside as I had a cat. Just one at that point. For future reference, her name is Bruce, and she's still with me.) Sadly that apartment had a pigeon problem, and they ended up roosting in the planter and killing it before it had a chance to bloom.
Steven (My partner.) and I moved to a new place about a year later, a townhouse with an actual garden bed and small backyard, and now also had a Dog. His name is Oy, after the billybumbler from the Dark Tower novels. My parents had actually purchased their first house and moved shortly after Steven and I first moved to that previous apartment. So when we were now at the townhouse, my mom had copious amounts of haustas to give me from her new garden. I was also gifted some new Stargazer Lily bulbs to plant as well. The garden also had a peony bush already planted, which also happens to be another one of my favorite flowers.
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The first year, the Stargazers bloomed beautifully and in abundance. The peonies were lovely and haustas did their thing. I'm a big fan of green leafy gardens. Because I've always just straight up killed anything I tried to grow. Anything I've mentioned already has been the few semi-success stories I've had. So seeing the garden grow so well was an accomplishment for me. I might even say I was proud of em.
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Sadly that was the one and only year that the lilies bloomed. The next they were completely overrun with Japanese lily beetles and before I even knew what they were and how to deal with them, the flowers were toast. The haustas and peonies were fine at least, but man, it sucked having the lilies destroyed. Steven helped me stay on top of checking for beetle eggs and he'd get the actual beetles off the plants the following year, but I never get the same incredible amount of blooms as I did that first year.
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What I think really kinda kicked off my gardening interest for me was actually an accidental spread of catnip from my neighbour's. I'd actually originally had catnip in the front garden, but I think it was too close to the grass and the landscapers for the townhome just thought it was a weed. But in the backyard, my neighbour's had planted some and it ended up spreading like mad and even past the fence and into our yard. So when I realized what it was I decided to harvest it. At that point I didn't know much more than, cut it and hang it to dry, so that's all I did. At this point it was kind of just a thing that was there so I might as well dry it for my cats. (Sometime during our years living in this place, we did adopt another cat. Her name is Kezia.) Also the flowers look like tiny little snapdragons and I think it's cute.
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After we moved to our next rental, a place we were splitting with a friend so all of us could have a nicer place for a decent price, I'd brought the surviving lily bulbs and the haustas with me. Believe I also brought the catnip, or some of it. There was already a garden with many plants in it at this place, so I sort of just made room for mine where I could. This year wasn't great for me on the mental health front, so I didnt really care for anything. As silly of a thing as it is, I still admire Steven for diligently killing any lily beetles that showed up during this year because I was in no state to be caring for a garden, but seeing the lily bloom did make me happy.
Finally, in this long and mostly pointless story, we get to the last couple years. After a year at the previous rental, we ended up moving into my mom's basement. My dad passed away in 2016, so my mom had been living alone in the house they bought. We're still there, and it has a lot of downsides, but that's not really what I want to talk about on this blog. One of the biggest plus sides is the backyard. It's perfect for Oy, and I really enjoy just sitting outside listening to the birds. But when we moved here, I'd again brought the lily bulb with me, the catnip (though Mom already had a fuckton of catnip in the garden.), and the haustas. I may or may not have also brought a couple pink hyacinths and a black tulip with me too..
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Thing is my mom's backyard is just entirely bordered with a garden. She's got tons of different plants and flowers already, but I got to claim a chunk of it. Sort of by accident really. It was already overrun with unattended catnip and that's where my lily got planted since it's a full sun spot. So when I say "my garden" this is the spot I'm referring to. As of right now it has one massive hausta at the left side, catnip for a couple feet, my Stargazer Lily, the pink hyacinths, a cactus of some kind that was my mom's, and I recently moved the mint over there too. Followed by even more catnip, a big huge grass like plant? and then some lavender! The lavender is a fairly new addition, as I'll talk about in later posts, but this chunk is from Steven's mom.
To wrap back to the beginning of this post, I've discovered in the last year or so I actually really enjoy spending time just watching the birds in the backyard and, even more recently, found myself enjoying taking care of the garden. See last year I spent hours outside just snipping the catnip and preparing it. I wanted to meticulously cut it so no stems woth in the final batch, and specifically cut the flowers to dry separately. I learned that was much easier by sitting beside the plant to snip the leaves and such off rather than snipping the whole plant and hanging it to dry. As soon as the whole plant is dry, the stems and stuff all just crunch and fall off with the leaves, making it much more of a task to remove them from the dried leaves afterward. I really enjoy the process of just sitting outside, listening to music, snipping away at the leaves.
This year, I've gone whole hog on the garden. I'm planning on making a few queued up posts going over everything rather than just posting it all right now. (especially since it's almost 3am and Steven's def wanting to go to bed but I'm also washing my duvet and drying it takes 600 years.) But in short I'm just genuinely surprised that everything is growing, alive, and hell, even thriving. I've got plants I've grown from seeds sprouting inside under a grow light and stuff in the garden is going well too. It's hard for me to admit but I'm pretty impressed with myself.
So all in all, I want to use the blog as a record of my gardening, and sometimes bird watching, journey. I'm not really expecting anyone to read it or even follow it, but either way it'll be like my own little outdoor adventure diary. Plus it's easier to share the photos if I wanna share them if they're all grouped together nicely.
That being said, that's all for now. Toodles!
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sorry-i-ship-drarry · 3 years
Text
31. Would you come back to me?
Prompt used- doing a pinky promise. This post have been inspired by one of @drarry-is-my-therapy recent reblog and one of @fqirycircle drawing, which is absolutely amazing. TW- ANGST | HURT/COMFORT | Harry's heart had always belonged to the boy by the lake.
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" dad" Albus said as he watched his father cleaning off the used utensils
" yea " harry replied looking over his shoulder to his son sitting behind the kitchen table.
" I- I was talking with mom the other day and she told me something " Albus nervously said
" oh yeah, what'd she tell ?" Harry chuckled
" why you guy's really separated " Albus replied. Harry stopped dead for a moment looking blankly at the utensils until he resumed washing, not replying anything yet.
Once done, harry wiped off his hands over his apron, handing Albus the cold coffee he had just brewed, taking one for himself, he sat down in front of Albus with a curious smile.
" so what'd she tell you ?"
" well- she doesn't want me talking to you about these things but I- think I'm big enough to know these things now, don't you think ?" He nervously asked once again.
" well- albus I think you are " harry gave albus a friendly frown and with that Albus immediately loosened up, giving harry a genuine smile.
" so what did she tell you ?" He asked once again pointing Albus to drink his cold coffee.
" well- she told me- that you guys didn't love each other " Albus said
" I do love your mom Albus-"
" just not the same way, right ?" Albus asked. Biting the inside of his cheek harry deliberated whether he should actually let Albus know or not, until he did, knowing if he were where Albus was, he'd want to know too.
Harry nodded hesitantly.
" but you guys seemed to love each other so much? Like all the things you did, I mean i don't get it how could you just fall out of love you know ?" Albus asked a little irritated by the fact that his parents had actually fallen out of love. Harry is suddenly strongly reminded of a very Vivid situation, the situation he'd been so familiar with.
" Albus- I think what you're trying to say is that we Always cared for each other. We often confuse love with care. At much later part of our marriage, before separation we had almost forgotten what was it like to love each other and simply cared for one another" harry explained.
Albus clenched looking at his father, " so you're saying one day we eventually fall out of love ?"
" what- no- Albus, no that's not what happened- hell " harry immediately responded.
" then what happened ?" Albus aggressively asked
" it's- it's just more complicated than it seems Albus but I want you to know that love is real, alright. Just because your parents didn't work out doesn't mean love cannot exists, look at your uncle Ron and aunt Hermione, I've rarely ever seen love like that and hell I can't even tell you how much time they had spent crushing desperately over each other for years. We're sorry- really for setting such a bad example but we're not perfect, nobody is. It's simply is we couldn't make it work and we regret it " harry sighed pushing his hair back from falling over his face.
Albus shoulder slumped down a bits, staring at the water ring on his coaster absent mindedly.
" just say it albus. Don't keep it in " harry encouraged knowing his son was deliberating about saying something.
Albus looked up at harry strangely, a look he had never looked at him with ever before, " she said- that you- you've never truly loved her. She said even though you loved her but a part of your heart Always belonged to someone else "
And everything stopped. Harry's breath caught in his throat, his hand stilled in the air, even his hair on his forehead became still. He was shook Ginny had told him something like that. It wasn't as if harry wasn't ever prepared for such conversations but the way it had twisted into something, it was unpredictable and he found it hard to focus on one thing.
" is it true dad ? That you loved someone else too ?" Albus contemplated nervously.
Harry looked up at albus, not realising when had he ever leant down and cleared his throat to gain his voice back.
" I never cheated alb-"
" I know. She knows that but she says she knew that you Always have loved Someone else too " Albus bit his lip nervously hoping he hadn't offended harry by saying something so personal.
" i- I never thought she'd actually tell you this" harry eyes widened in surprise as he cleared his throat once again.
" w- I shouldn't have bought this up- this is just-"
" hey hey, it's fine- you said you're big enough to know these things now- well then " harry interjected nervously " she's right. I- my heart as she put it, one part of it has always belonged to someone else " harry sighed closing his eyes, glimpsing back in his memories of that one Particular person.
" oh- who ?" He asked curiously
Harry raised his eyebrows, chuckling nervously, not believing it even for a second that he is infact about have this conversation.
" someone" he finally replied.
And with that harry is brought back into his memories from years ago, that one person's laughter resonating in his head, that one smile which was only reserved for him, that voice which echoed in his head every night, as if it was calling harry to it but just as he reached the bottom, there would be another bottom and he would be stuck. Everyday. And as harry started to finally tell Albus about his first love, he flows into his memory of the last day of 5th year after harry had recently lost Sirius and was extremely vulnerable, around the black lake away from everyone, in just his own little bubble with him.
The lake reflected with the red and yellow light of the dropping sun from across the mountain and a faint breeze drying Harry's face covered with tears. He has someone's arms around his shoulder, cooing him, reminding him one day everything would finally be fine but he didn't had it in him to even understand what he was saying. He was crying, heavily breathing because of the heart clenching pain, the void in his heart which had finally filled had now grown bigger, how was anything ever supposed to be fine..
" we need to end this " harry abruptly said
" what ?" He asked confused by Harry's sudden outrage with something complete nuisance.
" we can't- I can't keep doing this " harry replied numbly
" wha- why not ?" He asked furrowing his eyebrows, feeling slightly hurt by such abysmal suggestion.
" don't you see, I lose everyone one day and I- I can't- I don't want to deliberately lose you " harry replied looking at him.
He frowned " you're not losing me harry-"
" then will I not ?" They had never talked about future, only because it remained so uncertain that they hated the idea of future
" no- you will not " he replied
" and you are absolutely 100 percent sure ? Isn't there a possibility someone would find out about us and it'll spread like a wildfire and everyone would desperately try to separate us !" Harry exclaimed
" okay harry- first calm down. Nobody have found out about us in the last one year, it seems highly unlikely someone would-"
" voldemort knows " and suddenly both of their breaths came to a halt. One word and everything they owned collapsed onto the ground as if it was the fragile chandelier hanging on the top of a broken roof.
" how-"
" he can see in my head. We can't keep doing this-"
" then we fight-"
" I'll fight- can you ?"
And there was silence. He wanted to respond that he would but he didn't trust the world, even if he trusted himself. He hated the world. He was weak, fragile and in a fight against the world, he knew he'd always lose, over and over.
" we are on opposite sides of war. Voldemort's came out. He'll be rebuilding his army. Everything is going to change. Even us" harry tried to explain without wanting to break down. This was the first time harry after sirius had sensibly talked but it was self preservation speaking for him, he couldn't afford to lose someone he really loves, once again. For once he wanted to protect his heart, he couldn't roll it over his sleeves when his sleeves were covered with thorns. It would be a death call and he couldn't give in, just yet.
" you and I- people like us don't belong together. The world will never understand us and this is the first fight we'd lose. I want this but it's going to be difficult. We can't be together as Long as we are on opposite sides-"
"Then I'll be on your side- "
" you are " harry responded giving a weak smile
" but I belong on the other side" he replied looking far ahead over the lake as if the realisation had finally dawned upon him. Something he had always known but had now slapped him right in the face.
"yes " harry replied looking at him, Saving in his memories the last time what he really looked like, his smile, his long lashes, his crooked nose, his pale skin, his tinted cheeks, his soft ears, his soft hair, his storm filled eyes, his pink plumped lips he had kissed so often. Saving it away for one day what it would look like in a pensieve.
" we knew what we were getting into but we took the risk nevertheless. It was a deranged path and we knew it from the beginning " harry softly said clutching other man's fingers with his own.
He didn't reply, he just longingly stared at the waters, as if he was remembering them not harry.
" so we give up ?" He finally asked turning to harry with unseen part of his face wet with tears. Harry reached forward wiping away his tear but they didn't stop, they only flooded more with Harry's touch.
" no, we- we promise to come back once again after all this is over" harry smiled softly.
" and you believe there will be coming back after all ? What if one of us- dies " he hesitated In fear of only imagining it.
Harry started at him knowing it was one of the possibilities but wasn't ready for such thing. It was a huge possibility that one day harry might lose " I have hope for us " harry suddenly spoke out loud. The thoughts In his mind had unknowningly reached his lips and there wasn't a going back from that.
The other man stared at harry long enough, he too concealing this part of him for that one day they'd meet again.
" promise me then if we make it through, we'll come back to each other " he asked, his voice sounding not more than a quivering sound.
" I promise that If I make it through one day, we'll meet again and come back to each other" harry replied
" pinky promise ?" He smiled.
Harry chuckled, then nodded
" do you promise ?"
" I promise "
" what happened then ? How'd you wind up with mom ?" Albus asked curiously, a faint yellow light from the evening bouncing over his brunette head.
" did he- die ?" Albus asked almost heart broken
" what- no " harry chuckled
" then what happened ?" Albus asked again
" he- broke the promise. We belonged to someone else much before we could've even belonged to each other. When I met him after the war and his probation, he had changed completely " harry replied reminiscing about the specific day
" then didn't you ever ask him again ?" Albus asked almost jumping off his chair.
Harry gave a small smile " I couldn't "
" but why- what if he had still loved you ?" Albus asked
" as I said he was completely changed. He wasn't the man I fell in love with. He never asked either. It died out over time. Besides I'm pretty sure he had already forgotten about it. Also I think he was engaged by the time we met again, it didn't make sense" harry replied
" then didn't you ever like try to stop his wedding like In those romantic comedies mum watches ?" Albus asked excitedly
Harry laughed picking up their glasses and going over to the sink " she's always loved them. You've got to stop watching them if that's what you're cooking in your head Albus. Real love Is different than what they show, it's not just one fight and making it up. Its so much efforts, fights, pain, drama and so many other things"
" but If it's the right person, it'd never feel like that would it ? If you really love someone then those fights wouldn't be so bad or there wouldn't be pain or drama. It'd be a happy relationship, wouldn't it ?" And in that small sentence albus has unknowningly managed to define true love.
Harry looked at his now grown up son, crossing his arms smiling impressively. And nodded.
Albus sighed in relief, slumping down in his chair. Harry quizzically analysed Albus until his expressions changed to sometimes brief.
" who is it?" Harry asked knowingly
" what?" Albus blushed
" who's this person you're suddenly relating everything to ?" Harry teased poking Albus Playfully.
" there is no one dad" Albus blushed embarassed, jumping off the chair, taking a few steps back.
" come on- I told you my story. I atleast deserve to know who it is " harry smirked crossing his arms in front of him
Albus sighed rolling his eyes" he's from school"
" ooh, someone from school. Like father like son" harry teased
" dadd " Albus whined blushing
" okay- fine, fine. Who is it then ?" Harry asked giving up with the teasing.
" it doesn't matter, he doesn't like me " Albus sighed crossing his arms in front of him in disappointment.
Harry carefully analysed Albus's face again, remembering exactly the same way he felt "it's the Malfoy kid, isn't it ?"
Albus's eyes suddenly shot up in surprise.
" how did you-"
" you're my son. Of course I'd know" harry sighed uncrossing his arms and stepping forward and placing them in the kitchen table, leaning forward.
" don't make the same mistakes I did. Ask him out. Write to him maybe. I'm sure he'd agree " harry suggested.
" mistake ? What mistake did you make ?" Albus asked curiously.
Harry gave him a firm smile before he putting his hands away from the table to his sides " it's a story for some other day, your mom is gonna be here to pick you up in an hour. Do your stuff and we'll talk about it next week? What say ?"
Albus frowned before letting go and nodding.
" one last question dad "
" shoot" harry said as he started washing those used cups again
" did you ever love mom as much as you loved that someone ?"
Harry smiled this time not stopping " I- love like that happened only once. I loved your mom a different way. I loved him a different way "
" but who'd you love more then?"
Harry turned around to see Albus standing there leaning over the kitchen table curiously " I will not answer that. Now enough with my love life. Go do your homework " harry said a little sternly in his father like adamant voice.
Sighing Albus gave up.
" okay, just one question, I promise " Albus plead again. Harry sighed before nodding.
" if now he came back in your life and asks you for a second chance, would you go back to him ?"
Harry smiled Shaking his head" yes- yes I would "
The next week when Albus came back for the stay, he seemed far excited than anything else. As soon as Ginny had left, Albus squealed.
" whoa there squirrel, what's got your knickers in a twist ?" Harry chuckled
" I've got an invitation. Can we please go to scropius's place. He offered for a while. I'll promise we can come back and do homework, he really wants me to see his collections. Can we please dad, please ?" Albus gave harry his puppy eyes in desperation..
Harry sighed before nodding.
" for an hour.. "
And with that after an hour, they flooed to scropius's place. The Malfoy manor.
They were recieved with a rather very pleasant place. It was no longer a dark, submerged place, it had been refurbished with mostly white and brown. It seemed like an entirely new place. Not one part of Malfoy manor looked like what it did ages ago ,and yet harry liked it better. It was welcoming. And just then he walked in, with scropius.
" potter "
" Malfoy" harry sternly nodded at Draco, losing himself again in that brief reminiscents of the past. He hadn't changed even a little bit as he remembered him from the day by the lake, yet everything had changed. Everything.
" we're gonna go " Albus didn't even wait and ran off with scropius, leaving harry and draco alone, both staring at each other thinking how the other had forgotten of the promise..
( I've really been writing shit lately. Anyways hope you liked this one, I'd been very excited for this one but It haven't turned out as good as I wanted to, so .. )
Requests open
Part 2 & 3
Day 30- scared, potter | Day 32- reasons not to be in love with Draco malfoy by Harry
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peakyblindersxx · 3 years
Text
whiskey business - john shelby x reader (part 8 of ?)
Tumblr media
gif by @thesoldiersminute can i send you a cake or something cause fuCk!!!!!!!!!!! he's beautiful
a/n: to everyone still reading this fic, my sweet angels, ily!! this fic is so near and dear to my heart and @stxdyblr-2k has just done such an amazing job with it i can't even thank her enough. as per the last part, this one is also mostly her, just me editing but i hope you guys love it as much as i did!!! don't worry, there's gonna be a lot more :) and i apologize for being not as active, i'm gonna try to get a couple of requests up that i'm really excited about this week tysm for being patient with me <3
love, abi xxx
read part one two three four five six seven | my masterlist
prompt: ada has some talking to do, and you're not about to deny her.
warnings: fluff, semi-angst, tommy being the cocky mf he is (let's be real, it's only acceptable cause he's so damn fine), john being cute and in love and jesus i am head over heels
tagging: @datewithgianni, @mayaslifeinabox, @deepdonutkid, @springsoulofengland, @lilymurphy03, @operation-spot
You had planned to go to Ada's after work, but she obviously had other ideas. She didn't even bother walking in and asking to speak to you; instead, choosing to bang on the window closest to your desk and yelling at you to "fucking hurry up!" Your boss opened the door for you expectantly, not offering you any protection; he was firmly in the Shelby's ever growing pocket and as long as he could go home to his children, his sickly wife and their six bed in the country, with a full time nurse and nanny, he had no interest in crossing Thomas.
"Ada, I was coming to see you after work, I swear."
"I know. I was going to let you but..." She trailed off. "We need to talk. I don't know what the fuck is going on with you. John said he'd seen you last night and you asked after me."
John had indeed seen you last night. It was strange waking up with him, used to leaving almost immediately after he was finished with you. Your small bed could barely comfortably fit you both, having to intertwine your limbs with John's to not fall off the edge. You had awoken to John pressing a kiss to your forehead before lazily trailing his fingers between your legs, waiting for you to open your eyes before settling between your thighs, tongue swirling around your clit, making you cum before sunrise.
"Do we have to do this in the street?" You practically begged, the shouting having attracted onlookers.
"I wanted to talk to you before anyone else in the family gets to you because I need you to be honest."
"Ada-"
"No, I'm doing you a favour here, so you fucking listen. Right now, between you and I, no bullshit. No tactics. No white lies. You have to tell me exactly what we're dealing with." She looked frantic, scared for some reason.
You nodded, walking her down the side street, careful not to link arms with her. You knew she was doing you a favour; this wasn't about forgiveness or friendship, much more was at stake here.
"To what extent was Thomas involved?"
That took you off guard. Ada read the confusion on your face and sighed impatiently, her subtle plea for you to keep up.
Shit. You remembered your conversation with John, how she thought this was her brother's way of pushing her out of the company.
"Don't spare my feelings. What did my brother say to you?"
"He said it was in our mutual interest that you didn't find out. He didn't care who John slept with but cared who you trusted so I had to trust him. He said there was no point in upsetting you over one of John's conquests who he'd tire of in a month."
"That all?"
"Pretty much, I didn't know Arthur knew. He never talked to me about it, did laugh at Thomas' digs now that I think on it-"
"Did you know Isaiah and Michael knew?"
"I thought they were aware but no one ever talked to me about it."
"Of course they wouldn't." She hissed, frustration causing a nerve on her neck to jump.
Ada and you had spoken for years about the rampant misogyny of her brothers and any men you two came into contact with. Although you were both far more reserved than you used to be as rebellious and adventurous thirteen year olds, you'd both grew increasingly angry at how you were treated. She'd long written off her brothers as womanisers, who saw women as purely sexual and entertaining, objectifying them. You both long despised how they dehumanised women. She was amazed that Thomas had attempted to settle down and managed a somewhat loving marriage, but resented him for his carelessness and need for power which inevitably killed his wife.
"Ada, I just want to say..." You licked your lip nervously, unsure of how to continue.
"You need to talk, Y/N. No bollocks."
"Before last night, he'd never been to mine or called. I always went to him."
The muscle in her jaw tensed.
"You slept with him last night then?" You met her question with silence and she rolled her eyes. "The second he said he saw you I knew you had, he wanted to tell me that he was going to continue seeing you and that he hoped I'd be able to accept it one day."
"We never intended to hurt you. It was meant to be fun at first, but now..." You cut yourself off with a sigh, unable to admit you'd fallen for her brother.
"Isn't fun for me. It's fucking embarrassing." She paused, lighting a cigarette, nervous to offer you one, conflicted within herself. She raised her eyebrow, prompting you to continue, the mannerism so similar to her brother’s.
"It should never have happened. I am never going to be able to fix this, I'm so fucking ashamed for doing this to you, Ada."
She sulked, silently drinking in your words.
"Obviously it's not going to be the same, yeah? I'm really fucking upset. I'm so fucked off with you but Poll's really worried about a coup. She thinks you're being used as blackmail against John to keep him on side with Tommy while he expands."
"Makes sense."
"You're part of a much bigger game, you know?"
You nodded. "Yeah, and I knew I would lose from the start. Fucking tragic, Ada."
"My brothers keep pushing, keep growing the business. They keep chasing this prize but I don't think it even exists."
"If it does, it isn't worth it if this shit is the cost. I didn't mean to play into his hands."
"You couldn't have known." She said with a shrug, " 'Siah thinks John loves you."
"He told me last night." Several times, this morning also. You would never tire of hearing him moan those words into your neck or being yelled from your front door as he left for the office.
"You love him, don't you?" She said bluntly, a statement more than a question, your face suddenly hot with embarrassment.
Everything you'd suppressed for months, everything that you'd hidden, every time you lied smiling, every knowing glance from a stranger, every degrading comment from under Thomas' breath.
"I do, an awful lot."
She pauses, relighting her cigarette, "The worst thing about the entire situation is it could've been fine if someone told me. I wouldn't have loved it, obviously, but-" Ada sighed, rubbing her temple with her free fingers.
"I thought you'd hate me."
"How could I? I'd be more angry that you'd drop your standards for my brother. Seriously? Him? Mate…."
"Come off it, I've always thought he was charming. He's funny, smart-"
"Don't gush over my brother, it's grim. I'm just so fucked off you all lied to me." She peered at you through her cigarette smoke. "If you love him and he loves you..." she pressed her lips together as she tensed her jaw, "I could get over it. If it'd make you both happy. But that's going to take a long time. A long time."
"Ada-"
"Look I have meetings and shit to sort, I have to run." She interjected, checking her wristwatch, adjusting the cap which sat atop her trendy short haircut. You caught her arm before she could turn away.
"Thank you. For understanding."
She shrugged you off, "I don't get it, I'd never do that to you. But you also don't get to choose who you're attracted to. I'm really hurt, but I do love you and John a lot. He mentioned that after last night you helped him, got him cleaned up. I have to believe that you both do love each other. So I have to believe that this is a good idea for you both and not stand in your way."
"I love you, Ada. Can we hang out soon, just us two?"
She shook her head. "I need some time, I'll be in touch, yeah?"
You nod, stretching out your pinky finger. She sighed and linked it with hers, as you'd done since you were children, a silent signal to each other after a fight that you still had the other's back.
"Right, I've got to get back to this meeting, Tom is getting done by Polly for nearly getting John killed. I need to be there in case one of the lads needs patching up."
"Your aunt has a nasty left hook, I'll give her that."
"She'll be pleased you think so, she wanted Tommy to slice you to bits for crossing me."
"Fuck’s sake, thanks for the warning, I'll keep my head down. Good luck with the meeting."
Ada nodded and you watched her walk away, a Blinder suddenly appearing by her side seemingly from nowhere. This city was crawling with them. They clambered into Ada's car as you watched the car disappear into the distance before walking back to work. Thankfully, with your head still attached to your shoulders.
*******
Ada arrived at Thomas' estate, following the swell of shouting voices to his exquisite library. It was eye roll worthy and typical Tommy to choose the location of his post-fuckup debrief to be where he had the best view of the gardens, river and rolling hills. She could bet he'd sit in a corner and stare at the view, zoning out their aunt's lecture.
An armed blinder she vaguely recognised opened the door. Thomas was making a statement today with the armed guards, she noted. Her brothers really were fucked up. Arthur was an alcoholic killer who couldn't understand that Thomas would betray them all eventually, Finn was letting the tokyo and the razor chasers that circled him distract him from keeping the family together, John was apparently in love with her best friend, and finally, Thomas nearly got Arthur and John murdered last night with his foolishness. At this point only herself and Polly were holding everyone together, keeping everything silently moving along.
The door opened, and she was the last to arrive, Polly glaring as she murmured an apology, standing next to Finn. His eyes were bloodshot, grey-purple smudges under his eyes, he'd obviously had a heavy night. The last thing the poor lad needed was Polly's shrill yelling and the blinding sun streaming through the large immaculately crafted windows, which he'd tried to block with the brim of his cap. John caught her eye, acknowledging his sister with a nod, which she returned with a small tight smile.
Ada couldn't bear to think about the reasoning behind her brother's smug interjections in between Polly's rant to Thomas who was listening wordlessly, smoking.
Y/N and John? It didn't make sense. They had a similar sense of humour, sure, but she was far too intelligent for him. He also had a swarm of children, while Y/N preferred a wild night out only staggering home at daybreak.
It made far more sense for Y/N to end up with Michael, or if it had to be a brother, Finn. They were younger, so had less responsibilities and commitments so they could keep up with her. But John? Of course she knew he was believed to be the Casanova of her brothers, he was kind, he was an excellent father, yet he could never keep anyone around long, usually John was chasing someone new after a month or so. That's why the revelation that John had been involved with her best friend for almost half a year had taken her completely by surprise. Maybe that was why she was open to them being together. That had to be it. This relationship was completely out of character for John; she needed to believe that he was serious about his feelings towards Y/N and wasn't going to fuck her over. Because if he did, John would be a dead man.
"I don't know why you're all bleating at me. Yeah, I overlooked some details in the planning of last night's meeting-"
"Such as warning us that they were really fucked off because you'd helped bomb their warehouse." John pointed out.
"What do you want me to do? Apologise? Grow up, John." Tommy snapped back.
"They had loaded guns against their heads, they deserve an apology." Ada interjected, John giving her an appreciative flash of smile. She did love her big brother. Despite the fact that she'd pretty much only been yelling at him for the past month, John never dismissed her feelings and only apologised. It was confusing to admit to herself, but when Isaiah told her that he was confident John loved Y/N, she felt a wave of relief. At least he cared about her; it was the bare minimum but the Shelbys were notorious for not even meeting the bare minimum for acceptable social interactions.
"They didn't fuckin’ get shot." Thomas stated, his voice matter of fact and condescending.
"Do you ever hear yourself speak?" Polly spit back at him. "They didn't get shot this time. But it was too fucking close."
"It won't happen again, Polly." Tommy sighed. "What else can I say? Sorry lads, take the weekend off?"
"It's a good start." Arthur countered, "You're also paying for the extension on my house and my wedding."
"Fuck’s sake Arthur I was joking. But fine. Sure."
"You can't buy your family off." Polly scoffed at him.
"Think of it as compensation, a settlement." Thomas coolly corrected his aunt. "What do you want, John? A fucking farm?"
John hesitates while Finn whispered suggestions to him, Ada meeting his stare, John raising a brow to her in question. She sighed and nodded her approval.
"You can pay off my mortgage Tom, give me the kids' birthdays off-"
"So you'd never come into work then?" Finn cut in, Ada elbowing him in the ribs. She usually enjoyed Finn's remarks but she knew where John was heading; she could barely breathe.
"Tom, you're also to leave Y/N completely alone. If you have a problem with her, you come to me about it." He said firmly.
Arthur and Tommy traded knowing looks, obviously more aware of the ins and outs of his relationship than Ada was.
"Also if you're paying for Arthur's wedding I want the equivalent in cash." He adds.
Tommy shrugged. "Whatever. As long as we can move past last night and focus on today's order of business."
John nodded, satisfied. He knew Tom wouldn't care, but just saying out loud that he was involved with Y/N and having his family aware was a relief. He hadn't realised until he finally admitted how stressful keeping his relationship a secret was. Now, he could stop worrying about Tommy interfering.
Polly rolled her eyes, lecturing the brothers on their lack of moral backbone to allow themselves to be bought off, but dismissed them. She caught Ada's arm in hers on their way out, pulling her far from earshot.
"So Y/N and John are together now?" She asked, her face firm and scowling.
"Polls, I talked with her, she's aware of what she's done. She apologised and meant it. What more can I ask for?"
"Her not to have fucked him in the first place."
"She said that. Look, Polls, they're happy right? John seems happy-"
"He always is when he gets a leg over."
"You know she looked after him last night? Fixed him up after the meeting."
"Meeting? It was a fucking set up." Polly hissed but her face had softened. "She cleaned him up?"
"Antiseptic, bandages and all."
Polly looked subtly impressed, although she'd never admit it. "He went to hers? Not yours?"
"He wanted to talk to her." Ada shrugs, "I saw her this morning and-"
"What do you mean? You bumped into her?"
"I went to her work." Ada admitted, her aunt shooting her an exasperated glare.
"Why do I bother? Nobody listens to me."
"I had to talk to her, I'm glad I did. She reckons she loves him, he told her last night that he loves her, so..."
"We are talking about John? Our John?"
"I know Polls, I'm as amazed as you."
Her aunt huffed, unimpressed. "Are you okay with it though?"
"I guess, I just want them to be happy. I've told them to give me time with it."
"She was a good friend growing up, but people change, sometimes for the better, often for the worse."
"Poll, it's Y/N; she's my best friend. At the end of the day, we'd do anything for each other."
"Sweet Ada, you're going to be so miserable if you keep letting people walk all over you." Polly said wisely, kissing her goodbye affectionately. "I hope you're right. If she makes you cry again I'll kill her myself."
"Thanks, Polls."
She knew her aunt wasn't joking.
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newtonsheffield · 3 years
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Hello, beautiful!! It's been only a few weeks (a month I'd say) and I can officially say I've got hooked to the Bridgerton and Sons 'verse and its headcanons and it's WONDERFUL. I love it so, so much, and your writing in general! Please, continue doing it -as much as you feel comfortable- because your stories makes other people's days. 🥰 All this said (because you deserve being complimented), which headcanon would you love to write but no one has asked you yet? I bet you have got a "little" something you're excited about, yet you have not shared yet. Love from Spain (yep, this has reached Spain)! ❤️
And, another stupid fact: I'm your same age, and my birthday is in September too! #VirgoForTheWin, I guess! 😂
Ahhh Thank you to you for taking the time to read this ridiculous ‘verse and I’m so glad that I’ve kept you entertained this month, I have to say I’m becoming rather curious as to how everyone found this blog, was it purely through my shameless self promotion of Ao3 or ?? Let me know some other time! 
Spain??? My Goodness. That’s insane! I think of this as purely a local sort of blog although the fact that 2 people I know in real life have read it, is a little odd and Mortifying to me for some reason (I have refused to give anyone else the link including my older sister who eyed with a sort of Why are you like this? Look that only a truly exasperated sibling can pull off with appropriate love and concern when I told her what I’d been doing) Oh heyyyy! Birthday Buddies! September is a truly heinous time of year in Australia, because it’s strating to get ht and all of the flies and insects depressingly make themselves known again but there we have it!
Okay! I have been absolutely itching for someone to ask me about Edwina+ Kate and Anthony’s kids and absolutely no one has! I’ve been over here like “Guys! She’d be really cute with them!” And not a single one! So you didn’t really ask for them but here they are! 
When Edwina Sheffield found out she was going to be an aunt for the first time she was... beyond excited. Kate may have thought she would die single and alone but Edwina had known better and her heart had ached because she knew Kate would be a truly amazing mother. People had a tendencies to think of Kate as all sharp edges, and dry witticisms, but at her heart she was warm, and patient, and the way she wrapped her arms around you had a way of making you feel like nothing could ever be wrong again. So yes, Edwina was thrilled! And also because, yes, she may take a little bit of credit for Kate and Anthony’s relationship as a whole.
From the minute Eddie found out she was researching. Though she made the mistake of telling Kate this at brunch one day, 4 months into the pregnancy. Kate I’ve been researching and I’ve read that pregnant women really shouldn’t- Kate hadn’t even let her finish. She’d dropped her silverware loudly on the table stood up and said Eddie not you too. I’m so disappointed in you. and left the room leaving Edwina and their mother a little stunned. Anthony had barely been ruffled, he’d scoffed and said Edwina don’t worry about Kate, She apparently doesn’t believe in RESEARCH yelling the last word so his wife could hear him. Kate had called back I’l tell you where you can shove your fucking research! Edwina did not bring the matter up to Kate again though she did send Anthony articles every few days. 
When Edmund was born, Edwina loved spending time with him. She’d take him to the park, or the museum and they’d sit for hours, with her talking away, telling him about Anthony, and Kate, and the difference between a Stegosaurus and a Triceratops, strapped to her front in a tiny baby carrier. Even when people told her that Edmund was a baby and he really wouldn’t remember, she didn’t care. And when people would come up to her and comment on what a beautiful baby he was, and to Edwina’s mind there had never been a more beautiful one, she’d smile blindingly in the way she’d learned as an 18 year old startled people just a little and say Thank you! He’s my Nephew! Her heart brimming with pride. 
When Kate was pregnant with Miles Edwina was just as thrilled, She’d just gotten engaged to Matthew Bagwell and she absolutely could not be more thrilled. than when she sat at lunch with Kate and excitedly said Matthew asked me to marry him! And Kate had cooed over the ring and said how much she liked Matthew and then said dryly You should be careful though, Men lure you in being so sweet and charming, carrying their sons round in little baby carriers with a plastic dinosaur in there hair and it’s just a trap to get you pregnant again. Edwina had laughed loudly and when Miles was born a few months later she watched how gently Kate Held Edmund, who had the tiny baby in his arms and it brought a tear to her eye as she took a picture just like the one hanging in her Mother’s living room.
Thanks so much for indulging me with these!
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sunnyie-eve · 2 years
Text
One | A Year Ago
Series: Complicated | The Amazing Spider Man
Word count: 1498
[ Past Death, Mention of Suicide, Trauma, Fluff ]
Here comes the rain again Falling from the stars Drenched in my pain again Becoming who we are As my memory rests But never forgets what I lost Wake me up when September ends
"What the hell?!" I pull out my earbud looking towards my bedroom door to see Peter standing there smiling.
"I knocked, I called your name, and you still didn't hear me." He comes into my room.
"So you throw a barely drunken water bottle at me?" I turn my music off.
"How else would I get your attention?" Peter jumps onto my bed.
"Come up to my bed, get into my view so I know you're here. Why are you here?" I asked, gathering my stuff on my bed to put up.
"Am I not allowed to see my best friend?" He leans back onto me.
"You can but I was just wondering."
"Well you didn't go to school today." I finally noticed his face was slightly swollen.
"Did Flash do this?" I make him sit up.
"You ignored my question." He says as I pull his hood off.
"You ignore mine too." I cross my arms.
"You know he did so asking was dumb." I nod my head agreeing with him.
"Why didn't you go?" He asks and I try not to cry again like I've been doing all day.
Peter looks over at what I was drawing and his face drops, pulling me into a hug. "I can't believe I forgot." He rubs my back making me cry into his chest.
A year ago I saw my father kill himself when he took us on a camping trip. It was to celebrate my mom's birthday because she used to love camping. We ended up losing her a few months before her birthday in a car accident.
My father was having a much harder time than I was trying to get back to normal without her. On the trip I woke up hearing my dad leave his tent but I thought he just had to use the bathroom. When I knew he was taking too long I got out of my tent to go look for him.
Luckily but not at the same time I followed his footprints in the mud to a old zip line tree platform. I remember looking up to see his back side before he jumped.
In the moment I was in pure shock seeing my father just hanging there. The jump was so high that the rope just snapped his neck.
I'm sure I stood there frozen for a good amount of time before letting out a horrific scream making nearby campers run to see what had happened.
The first person to reach me was a man about the same age as my father. He covered my eyes and as a couple came running up he told them to take me to my parents.
The couple kept asking me where my parents and I just remembered crying into the woman's chest pointing my arm back and up at the tree. She asked about my mother and I shook my head no.
From the campsite to the police station I didn't remember much. Everything was just blurry till my aunt from my dad's side came and picked me up.
Even though my life was now terrible, I tried to think positive that she moved into our place so I could still be home. She didn't want to move me away from Peter since he was all I had left.
"I'm gonna go home real quick to let Aunt May and Uncle Ben know I'm gonna spend the rest of the day with you. Okay?" Peter says into my hair.
"You don't have to come back." I wipe my tears away.
"I don't have to but I want and need to. I'll try not to take so long. I'll be back, I promise." Peter gets off my bed running out of my room.
Part of me wanted Peter to hurry up and come back but at the same time I just wanted to be alone. I just get in bed listening to music till I fall asleep.
-
As much as Peter wanted to stay home after finding his fathers' bag, to look through it more, he took it to his room so he could look at it later. Right now Madeline needed him.
"Oh, I'm gonna go spend time with Maddie because it's been a year today." Peter tells his Aunt and Uncle heading towards the door.
"Poor girl." May remembers.
"Take care of her." Ben tells Peter as he rushes outside jogging a few doors down.
"I promised I'd be back." Peter smiles at Maddie's Aunt Quinn.
"I just peeked into her room and she's asleep." She tells him but he wasn't gonna go home. "You're not gonna leave her, huh? I'm glad she has you Peter. That's why I moved here instead of moving her to me. You're all she has left." Quinn gives him a sad smile.
"I can assure you that I don't plan on leaving her side anytime soon or at all. You're stuck with me." He gives her a hug. "And I'm not all she has. She has you too." Quinn smiles at that as he goes up to Madeline's room.
As he opens her door he sees her curled in a ball asleep with her earbuds in still. Madeline meant a lot to him and he was the only one who knew how much.
To the adults, they thought because they basically grew up together, but that was only part of it. Peter himself wasn't sure how much he liked his best friend.
He loved her as a friend but the older they got his feelings started to slightly change. It actually scared him because what if or when he really falls for her and she doesn't feel the same. Their whole friendship would become awkward and fall apart.
Peter walks over to her carefully taking out her earbuds, turning her music off without waking her up. After setting it down on her desk, he crawls into bed with her.
Immediately she cuddles into him as he puts his arms around her pulling her closer to him. He couldn't imagine how she felt. Yeah, they both lost both of their parents, but with her own eyes she saw her dad die.
Peter couldn't fully grasp the whole reasoning why her father would do it. Yes, he had a hard time going on without his wife in his life. But leaving your daughter on her own... on her mother's birthday.
Why take your daughter out camping then leave her alone in her tent wandering out into the woods to find a spot to end your life?
"You came back?" Madeline whispers with her eyes closed.
"I promised. You know I don't break my promises to you." He holds her tighter.
"Can we just stay here till you need to go home?" She asks him.
"Whatever you want. I found a case of my dads." He tells her.
"What was in it?" She moves her head to look up at him.
"Nothing really." He sighs so she rubs his arm.
"I'm sorry." Peter shakes his head at her.
"Don't tell me sorry. You don't wanna hear that word today and neither do I." Madeline just lets it go.
"Other than Flash hurting you. How was your day?" She changes the topic.
"Gwen talked to me. Asked if I knew my name to see if I had a concussion." He laughs while Madeline slightly smiles.
She knew Peter had a crush on Gwen and she tried to ignore how it made her feel. She's always had a crush on Peter but since he never gave hints if he felt the same she tried to move on from it.
"Did you remember your name though?" She laughs at him.
"Of course I remembered my name because I didn't have one." He rubs her back.
"What happened for this to happen anyways?" She asks pointing at his chin.
"I stood up to him helping another guy getting picked on." Madeline smiles at him.
"What? Why are you smiling?" Peter asks, confused.
"I'm proud of you. Usually I do it for you. My boy is growing up." She jokes with him.
"I hate you." He pinches her side, making her slap him.
"If you hated me, you wouldn't be laying in bed with me trying to take my mind off from seeing my dad being a tree decoration for Halloween." Peter grabs her face making her look him in the eyes.
"I get that's your way of joking to get through this but don't say that. It's not funny. I know it traumatized and scared you because every Halloween you can't stand seeing a plastic skeleton hanging from a tree. If you look too long you fall apart." Madeline's eyes tear up, making Peter hold her as tight as he can against his chest.
NEXT
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Text
Can you save me from this nothing I've become?
Pairing: Kook!JJ x Pogue!Reader
Word Count: 4.5k
Summary: Life Swap AU. JJ grew up as a sheltered boy in a golden cage in Figure Eight and doesn’t even have a clue how life in the Cut is like. That is until he meets you, the perfect example for life in an abusive household drowning in poverty. 
Warnings: A little bit of sadness, mentions of abuse, mostly fluffy tho
Available on: AO3
A/N: @outabanks​ asked me to write this for her so I tried. It’s a little different from anything else I’ve written so far and it was quite hard to find a tone for JJ now that he didn’t grow up in a physical abusive home and probably wouldn’t react with so much violence. I went with him feeling trapped, lonely and just sad inside due to him more suffering from emotional abuse. Also, switching POVs! Have fun!
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“Yes, Charlotte, I make sure to pick out my best outfit.” JJ groaned at his stepmother and went to his own bathroom to take a shower.
She was really annoying sometimes but after his mother and father divorced, he had been quick to replace her to maintain the image, dragging his mother’s name through mud in the process.
Figure Eight was a place where you grew up comfortably and never had to worry about a thing, at least on the outside.
JJ had grown up as the typical rich kid, getting everything he wanted. Problem was, he had been showered with money, not love, meaning he was missing what was most important. Back when his mother was still here, she had been the only person to show him what life really meant but she hadn’t been around for too long. Actually, he never got to know why she had left.
When Charlotte had married his father, it got even worse. Money here, fancy clothes there. She had never been a mother to him, she also never even tried as she wasn’t interested in him and only the money his dad had.
Whatever, he didn’t care about her either, he just wished she would leave him in peace once in a while but whenever he planned to go outside and do something she always came running and told him how to dress so he would look the best.
Tomorrow was another charity event and she had been stressing about the right clothes for weeks and he wouldn’t have any of it.
JJ got out of the shower with a sigh, towel around his waist and hair still dripping a little on the floor beneath him. He knew he had a good life, technically but sometimes he wondered how it felt to be a normal kid, growing up downtown or the Cut. He had never been down there actually, only heard that people from the Cut were poor but in comparison to the people from Figure Eight, poor couldn’t be too bad, right?
The reason he had never been down there was his father. He might look like the perfect father on the outside but on the inside, he was rotting away, fueled by his addiction for money and a wealthy lifestyle. One wrong step and JJ would suffer, in either emotional and very rarely physical way.
He was trapped in a golden cage he couldn’t escape until he was old enough which would still take a few more years. He just had to hold on, pretend to like his life when they were in public and just be done with it.
“We’re off then, son. See you tomorrow!” his father yelled from downstairs as JJ got dressed in some loser clothes so he could enjoy his time home alone.
“Yeah, have fun,” he said nonchalantly, not really caring about them leaving to visit the Cameron’s to talk about some preparations for tomorrow.
When he heard the front door shut he let out a sigh of relief and lay down on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. They wouldn’t be back until past midnight, that’s always how it went.
It was the perfect time to think about how lonely he actually was. His parents divorced, his mother not even calling or writing him, his dad only caring about money and his new wife. Friends? Sadly none. Kook Academy wasn’t the place where he wanted to be and he had a hard time blending in. It was a place where everyone was so narcissistic and wanted to show off all they had. Also really competitive people. Who had the bigger car, who had the more expensive outfit, things like that.
The only person he rarely talked to at events was Kiara, a wealthy girl from the neighborhood next to his own. He heard that she was hanging around with the Pogues in the Cut but he never asked her about it. They mostly just saw each other, nodded briefly and started drinking together. He listened to her rambling about saving turtles in a drunken state later on while he made flirty comments she always shut down very quickly. It was a simple way to pass the time while trying to get through the evening.
His father told him to befriend the Cameron’s but to be honest? No. Wheezie was just a little girl, Sarah was the princess around here and he had no desire to walk around with royalty and get judged by only that. Rafe was a dick, he had actually tried to befriend him when they were younger but that boy had massive issues.
So yep, loneliness it was. On the outside, his life was perfect but on the inside he was struggling. One day he would escape, go to the mainland and do his own thing. He wanted to get far away from Outer Banks and his father, all these riches he had. There was enough money on his own bank account to help him get started but JJ wanted to work with his own hands, get dirty, live the life he wanted.
Suddenly he heard a crash in the front yard and he shot up from his bed, opening the door to his balcony and looked outside, trying to see something in the darkness. It took a moment for his eyes to get used to the missing light before he scanned the garden. A vase was shattered to the left and to the right…
Shit!
Someone was face down in their pool and it looked like they weren’t moving.
JJ rushed downstairs and to the garden, quickly jumping in to get the person out. He put the body down next to the pool, slapping the cheek slightly. Luckily enough he had been quick enough and the person was waking up, spitting out a little bit of water.
“I don't think it’s the best time to take a swim,” he said while he sat there on his knees, looking over at the girl that couldn’t be older than he was.
She wasn’t answering, just looking at him for a moment before closing her eyes again, passing out once more.
    When you woke up, you had no idea where you were. The bed under you felt softer than your own and you had a huge headache. Also, you were wearing comfortable clothes for some reason. Still a dream? Maybe.
You slowly opened your eyes, afraid that feeling of warmth would be gone now but it didn’t vanish. As you were looking around you noticed a boy on the ground, wrapped in a blanket and you blinked. 
Looking down at your body told you that you were totally not wearing your own clothes. These were really fine and soft, it almost felt like they were giving you a warm hug.
It took awhile for you to connect the dots but then your face turned white. The boy on the ground had seen you naked.
“Perv!” you suddenly yelled and threw the pillow behind you at him which caused him to stir.
“What the fuck,” he mumbled and got up and for the first time, you got a good look at these blue eyes and the messy, blonde bed hair. “This is what I get for saving your ass?”
Saving your ass? You frowned and now that you thought about it, you had no idea what had happened last night after you ran away from home. You knew you had been drinking to try and stop the pain but then it all went black.
“What do you mean?” you asked and tilted your head a little to the side like a lost puppy.
“Apparently you were either really fond of having a swim or trying to drown yourself in my pool,” he said while he got up, stretching and showing off his body to you. Of course he was not wearing a shirt, why would he. It was too hot for that anyway. He was too hot. Shit, focus!
“I wasn’t drowning myself,” you said even though you wished that had worked.
Silence fell over you for a moment while he just stood there, looking at your miserable form before he rubbed the back of his neck and looked clearly uncomfortable.
“Look, I’ve seen the bruises…,” he started and you looked back at him, clenching your jaw. Of course he had seen the bruises, he had seen you naked and they were quite visible all over your body.
“It’s nothing. Where are my clothes? I want to leave.” You didn’t want to stay here and talk to a stranger that apparently saved you from drowning. Oh. That was probably why you were wearing different clothes, he had taken care of them so you wouldn’t get a cold. Well, not exactly the first thought you had but thank god you still had your virginity.
“Do you need help?” he asked softly and crouched in front the bed which caused you to frown. No one had ever asked you that. It took a long moment before you shook your head.
“No, I’ll be fine.” You nodded and got out of bed which made him stand up again. He was taller than you were and you bit your bottom lip while looking around in his room some more. This was clearly not the Cut. This looked like a Figure Eight house. Oh god, had you wandered that far?
“Can I make you breakfast at least? My parents are still asleep,” he said and you chewed on your lip a little before you nodded. Your stomach was dying inside as you hadn't eaten in two days because your aunt prefered to let you starve while she spent all her money on alcohol and drugs. You wished your parents were still alive but that wasn’t an option.
“Alright, wait here, I’ll bring you some up.” With that he was already gone and you went back under the soft blanket. If you would stand up more your head was probably going to explode and you would fall due to it’s spinning non stop. Laying down was good. Sitting upright a little was good too.
You had never seen this boy before which wasn’t a surprise given that you had been to Figure Eight only one or two times with Kiara. The Pogues were the only reason to get out of bed in the morning but currently, they were all doing their own thing which was fine but also made you sad a little.
The blonde boy was up quicker than you thought and he put the tray down on your legs with a smile.
“I’m JJ, by the way,” he said as he grabbed the chair from his desk and rolled it over, taking one of the plates from the try to put some food on it.
You blinked at all the food in front of you and you were sure you hadn’t seen that many at once, at least not something you were allowed to eat. Bread buns, scrambled egg, different kinds of sausages and grapes. He must have noticed how skinny you were.
“I’m (y/n),” you simply said while staring at the food, not even sure if you could eat but when you looked at him eating and he smiled at you, you couldn’t stop yourself.
It was a feast for you. Did he always have breakfasts like that? God, what a lucky person.
“Nice to meet you, (y/n). Wanna tell me now why you were swimming in my pool at midnight?” he asked and grinned a little. He wanted to get details but he didn’t want to completely ruin the mood, something you could appreciate.
You didn’t know him and you weren’t easily trusting a person but he saved you, made you breakfast and you would probably never see him again, so you kinda owed him, right? Also he had already seen the bruises and given all the books he had in his room, he seemed to be a smart boy that had figured it all out on his own already.
“I was trying to get away from life,” you mumbled with your mouth full and he raised an eyebrow at that. “Got beat up, didn’t eat for two days, ran away to drink the pain away and then it went all black but it seems like I wanted to get a look at a life I’ll never have and then I somehow ended up in your pool. I wasn’t trying to drown myself, I promise.”
Well, the mood he had been trying to maintain was totally ruined by your words now. You spoke them so casually like they were no big deal but you saw how his eyes widened and he stopped eating while you still continued. Yes, your life was pure shit but it would be okay one day. One day you’d get out of your aunt’s death grip and get the life you deserved.
“I-,” he started but didn’t seem to be able to finish so you waved off. 
“It’s fine. It happens. Something you can’t understand, no offense.” He was living a good life full of privileges and riches, of course he wouldn’t understand what you went through and that was okay. You didn’t want his pity, he didn’t seem to care about people at the Cut anyway. 
“I might not understand your life but you obviously don’t understand my life either,” he chuckled and took some grapes to eat. You raised both eyebrows at him, what did he mean? Apparently he could read the face you were making and continued. “Life here isn’t all that great either. I may not suffer from a lot of physical abuse but emotional one. Being rich isn’t always good, ya know.”
“I’d kill for being rich,” you blurted out and it made him laugh. He had a beautiful laugh but it also sounded really sad for some reason.
“Yeah, that’s probably how a lot of people here became rich.” That made you laugh too, he was probably right. You knew a few Kooks that looked like they had killed for their wealth.
You both ate in silence and when you were done, he put the tray away to look at you with a look that you couldn’t quite place.
“Where are my clothes?” you asked to break the stare and he nodded.
“I’ll get them, one second,” he said and walked over into a room which was...his bathroom? God, he even had his own bathroom. What the fuck.
JJ came out with them again and they looked so much cleaner than before. “Did you wash them?” you asked because it didn’t look like it was just the pool water.
“Yeah, they looked like they needed it,” he said and put them over the bed. When you grabbed them you felt how soft they were now after the cleaning and you smiled a little to yourself. They also smelled really good.
You got out of the bed and pressed past him into the bathroom so you could get changed. When you came out of it again you felt old and new at the same time. Thankfully, the headache was slowly fading away.
“Alright, thanks for saving me, I’ll be off then,” you exclaimed as you had occupied him enough now. He already knew more about you than a stranger should and you had to get out of here before he tried to play your savior.
You had already a hand at the doorknob when he reached out to you, grabbing your arm to stop you from leaving. Of course he had to do that.
“I know this isn’t any of my business but if you ever need help, come here, okay? I’ll try my best,” he said and normally you would huff at such an offer as you had been disappointed so many times in your life but for some reason, he sounded so absolutely genuine that you nodded. You believed him but you also had no desire to get back here any time soon. Figure Eight wasn’t the place you wanted to be, it only reminded you of what could have been but wasn’t.
“Thanks,” you mumbled and he let go of you.
    Two weeks had passed and he couldn’t get the girl out of his head. There had been something that made him want to save her even though she seemed to be the kind of girl that didn’t want saving. 
Something deep inside of him was screaming at him to find you and that’s exactly what he did right now. His father would kill him but he didn’t care anymore. It was like there was a strange bond that was pulling him closer to you and away from the life he didn’t want.
The Cut was different than he had expected. During his sheltered life, downtown had been the only area he had visited, it was almost like an invisible wall that his father had placed here, not allowing him to go any further. As a kid he had been curious about it but after a while of useless attempts to convince his father he had given up on getting to know the rest of the island.
He couldn’t say why he didn’t try again now that he was older. Maybe he really wasn’t interested anymore after all those years. Maybe it was his father’s voice that was echoing in his head the closer he got to that invisible wall.
Until he broke through it. He drove past that magical line that had kept him and suddenly he saw what was really going on. They weren’t just a little less fortunate than the people from Figure Eight. His dad had lied to him and he felt sick for a moment.
He drove past small shacks, some looking like they would get blown away by the next storm. They were just poor and lived in poverty. Well, maybe not all of them but the further he drove away from the downtown area the more sad and wild it looked around him. There was also a strange feeling of freedom to it, he couldn’t really describe it.
Figure Eight was all beautiful houses and big mansions, perfectly cut grass, cars and pools. Everything had to be perfect but this? Lots of people didn’t care about their grass, he saw some old cars and trucks, some people had a small boat but nothing compared to the yacht his father owned. It was so different and he hated himself for never coming here. When did he become such an ignorant person?
Something suddenly jumped out of the bushes to the right and he hit the breaks, barely stopping in front of the person who was standing right in front of his car, looking straight at him.
“What the fuck?!” the girl yelled and he would always recognize that voice, it had almost burned into his soul. She was so different from everything he knew. Looks like the string that was pulling him had reached its destination.
    Great, now some idiot tried to run you over while you were busy running away from Barry. This couldn’t get any worse. You were about to keep running when you saw who got out of the car. It was the blonde pretty boy with the sad eyes from Figure Eight that you kept dreaming about for the last two weeks. A wink of destiny? Either way, it looked like he was your escape.
JJ got out of the car and smiled at you, slowly coming over to you, probably wanting to make sure you were okay but he barely scraped you. 
“JJ?” you asked in disbelief and he chuckled a little. It was weird to see him here, out of place, so far away from home.
“If I wouldn’t know any better I’d say you tried to get him by a car this time,” he said and laughed when he saw you glare. You really didn’t have time for this bullshit. Yes, being dead would be better sometimes given your circumstances but right now you’d prefer to prevent that.
You threw a look behind you and then back at him. “In the car,” you hissed and shoved him back to his side of the car while you got in on the other side.
“Drive,” you said and looked out to the right side where you had been coming from but he looked at you confused.
Barry came out of the bushes and you turned around to JJ in a split second, pressing your lips against his, hoping to make Barry think that it was just a rich couple that came down here to make out. He wasn’t the brightest candle on the cake after all.
When you saw him leave out of the corner of your eye you sighed into the kiss but only slowly moved away. JJ’s lips felt good, pressed against yours like it was the only thing he had ever wanted.
Reality hit and you pulled back, swallowing slightly. “Sorry uhm...just needed to distract that guy,” you mumbled and licked your lips, still tasting him.
“What was that about?” he asked and seemed a little dumbfounded by the sudden kiss.
“I was running from our local drug dealer,” you explained like it was the most normal thing to do. Maybe you had stolen him some money but you only wanted food and you knew where he stored it so you might as well just borrow it. For a very long time.
“You could have just hidden on the backseat, you know,” he teased and wiggled his eyebrows which caused you to slap him slightly against the shoulder.
“It was a distraction kiss, nothing else. Don’t let it get to your head,” you said ang took a deep breath when you felt your body relax.
“What now? Any place I can drive you to?” he suddenly asked and you looked over at him, thinking for a moment. You’d be safe with John B and the others as you wanted to meet up later anyway. You nodded and gave him some quick directions.
“So, what are you doing here?” you asked and watched him drive. He had such a pretty face if those eyes wouldn’t be so sad. You wondered why he was like that, he had everything you could wish for and yet, he was still so sad.
“Actually, I was looking for you. I also had never been down to the Cut, my father always keeping me from it so I wanted to take a look.” His voice was so smooth and you had the urge to just press your lips against his once more.
What the fuck was going on in your head? God, that needed to stop, he was a Kook after all. No good came from them.
“Why were you looking for me?” It was beyond you why he would come here only to find you. You were just some girl he had saved from her own stupidity. On the other hand, you couldn’t deny that you hoped to see him again shortly after you had left his place back then. There had been something about him that was pulling you closer and those dreams you had weren’t for nothing. He was special in a way you couldn’t describe just yet.
“I don’t know, to be honest. I just had the feeling I had to,” he said and it confirmed your feelings. He also didn’t really know what he was doing here, just like you didn’t know why you wanted him here.
It was a strange connection that had formed within a couple of hours two weeks ago, a connection that didn’t break. Normally people meet other people, establish some kind of relationship between them. Acquaintances, friends, work colleagues, stuff like that. Sometimes you just meet a stranger, talk to them and then break the connection off.
That’s what you thought this would be but the connection was still there, it was deep in your bones and your mind.
Stupid Kook, about to turn your world around.
You arrived at the Chateau where John B was already coming over before JJ could turn the motor off. He obviously wasn’t used to such cars arriving at his place, that’s why you got out first.
“It’s me!” you yelled and JB visibly relaxed before taking another look at the car and the boy coming out of there.
“Who’s that?” he asked and frowned at you but you just waved off. 
“That’s JJ. He saved me, two times to be exact. He’s cool.” You waved JJ over and he followed you step to John B. You gave him a quick hug and then saw how JJ held out his hand.
You glared at John B and he groaned slightly before shaking JJ’s hand.
“I don’t know why you’d bring a Kook here,” he grumbled and you hit his arm slightly.
“I told you, he is cool. He’s pool boy.” You might have mentioned that accident to your friends without any names or mentioning that your blonde savior was a Kook. Oops.
“Pool boy?” a female voice said while coming out of the house and you waved at Kie.
“Kiara?” JJ suddenly said and looked over at her, watching how she stopped in her tracks. You looked between the two of them forth and back.
“JJ?” Yup, they totally knew each other.
“Donkey?” you threw in and laughed a little at your Shrek reference, causing the others to laugh too.
“You know each other?” John B said in choir and the both nodded.
“Yeah, he’s the guy that keeps me grounded at all the Kook events. We drink and make it through the night somehow. He’s cool,” Kiara explained and JJ nodded in agreement.
“See, told you,” you teased John B and he just rolled your eyes. He sometimes acted like a big brother when he wasn’t drowning in his own shit.
“Are you staying? I know what it feels like to be a Kook, so I might as well show you my escape”, Kiara said and JJ rubbed the back of his neck with his hand.
You laughed a little because he seemed so out of place right now but you could tell he probably needs an escape from life once in a while.
“Okay, show me,” JJ said and you grinned at him. It was a reckless thing to do, taking a Kook in but technically, Kiara was one too and if she and JJ got along, he would also get along with Pope and John B. It might just take a while but it would be okay.
There was this feeling inside of you that was telling you to help him, to make his eyes look sad and to hear a genuine laugh from him.
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agirlneedsgoals · 2 years
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This got long. Boo.
I can hear my mom on the phone with my uncle encouraging him and my aunt to move here. Please no. I love them, but please no. The latent racism and homophobia are rampant and since I can't respond to it (mom asked me to keep the peace and this is her house) I find myself dissociating. Plus, mom drinks like 5 x as much when they're around because they're lowkey alcoholics but don't realize it.
I'm writing. I can't believe it. I have 10k words of fanfic that nobody's gonna read or care about. BUT I'M WRITING. Like, I almost don't care about that because TEN THOUSAND WORDS. I'm disappointed it's not my own stuff, but who cares? I'M WRITING. 😊
I'm supposed to go to dinner with mom and her friend Linda tonight. I bail a lot and I feel very bad about it. I worry Linda will think it's her because she hangs out with mom the most but I bail a lot whenever I'm invited out because I don't feel good or--like today--I didn't get to sleep until 6 am and I feel like death inside.
Oh, God, why is my mother talking about Tinder with my uncle???
Oh, good, I'm hearing internalized misogyny. My favorite.
I'm trying really cheap drugstore makeup lately. I haven't used drugstore foundation in...years and years. But I can't afford anything high-end anymore. In fact, I can't afford the drugstore stuff, either, but I'm shameless and don't mind asking for handouts. The MISSHA M Perfect Cover BB Cream is still my go-to for full makeup but I want something I can just slap on before I leave the house so I don't look so...me. I tried the L'Oreal Paradise Water-Infused Tinted Moisturizer. It is. Not a moisturizer. At all. It went on dry, went patchy, I got it too light for my skin. Ugh. Maybe someone with an actual skincare routine can use it better so I'm giving it to @clockwrkheart to see if she likes it but I'm disappointed. So now I got the L'Oreal Paris Makeup Magic Skin Beautifier Anti-Redness BB Cream. Goddamn, what a name. And BB Cream is redundant. Beauty balm cream. ANYWAY. I hope it's better than their other stuff.
I have to pause here and say, I am suffering through my mom gushing about Jack Reacher... I mean, valid. But also awkward. I'm still bitter about Hawk. I get the actor leaving but did they have to do him like that???
I want to go back to having a skincare routine. Clearly, I do not have the executive function to do my 17 - 21 step Korean-based skincare. But if I could just get into a routine where I have a wash, a mask, a serum, and a moisturizer, I'd be happy. Unfortunately, most of my stuff is still scattered through boxes. Because I fail as a human.
I have some concealers coming: COVERGIRL TruBlend Undercover Concealer in two colors for contour and highlight. I haven't used COVERGIRL anything in like over a decade. Their lipsticks oxidize on me and turn pinky.
Fuck, I have to cut this, don't I. I've hit the babble portion of exhaustion. Just be glad you're not here in person. Ask my friends, it's like a compulsion, I just...talk.
I need to do stuff. Like anything. I'm frozen and stuck sleeping when I can because I can't usually sleep. I went down to the Valley what, two weeks ago? A week ago? Idk, time is weird. But it took me like 3 - 4 days to recover. Weak. Frustrating. All my craft room stuff has just been...shoved into my craft room. Why do my extra rooms always end up looking like there was a hurricane in a storage room?
Maybe I can suss out my makeup. I had it all nice in the giant pink rollie train case but then I found more makeup. So we bought a giant black rollie train case but it's just thrown in there haphazardly. Also, I shoved my hair dryers and stuff in the bottom and I have to undo all 3 layers separately to get to the fourth because I can't lift all 3 layers together and maybe this wasn't such a good idea for my makeup storage. Idk. I wanted something portable. And it is! But it's not flight-portable. One knock from the pusher and they'd pop open.
Oh. I might be writing so much because the babble achievement has been unlocked, I just realized. Huh. Doesn't explain the fanfic over original stuff, though.
I swear I actually had something to say but I can't remember it. I'm just kind of letting my mind wander right now because I don't have the energy for any kind of mental structure. So many words, so little meaning.
I'm reading a very good medieval au right now. I love it. I want to squish it. I hope Bucket is endgame but it might be Steeb, idk. The author is not known for happy endings.
I'm also reading a mob au on my phone which is also very good but I've been dragging my feet because I suspect someone gets shot or something in the next few paragraphs and I don't wanna.
I also downloaded a bunch of new books to read. Half of them are YA fiction but whatever. Maybe it'll inspire me. I'll take writing teen romance if selling through Amazon would pay me enough to make my credit card bills.
DOES ANYBODY FEEL LIKE BETA'ING A FIC? I'd go over details with you privately. I'd need grammar/spelling and just general check-over plus opinion on plot and pacing. Obviously, nobody's gonna see this here so I might make a post asking someday.
Jeez, this post is like looking at a wall of text. I'mma take a nap.
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goldenavenger02 · 3 years
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Susz's Halloween Recommendations Part 2: Books and Fics.
Books
Pet Sematary by Stephan King
Dr. Louis Creed and his wife, Rachel, moved to Ludlow, Maine with their two young kids, Ellie and Gage, and their cat, Church. In the woods, near their home is a pet cemetery with a sign that was spelled sematary.
Notes: this book made me scared of my own cats for about two weeks. I really enjoyed it but that scene with the cat was very excessive.
Sadie by Courtney Summers
The book chronicles teenager Sadie Hunter’s quest to find the man who killed her sister. In alternating chapters, Sadie’s subsequent disappearance becomes the topic of West McCray’s podcast The Girls.
Notes: this audio book is so fantastic, especially the podcast elements! Trigger warnings for Sexual Assault and Child Abuse.
The Project by Courtney Summers
But dealing with her ex is the least of Hannah's concerns when a terrifying blood ritual interrupts the end-of-school-year bonfire.
Lo Denham is used to being on her own. After her parents died, Lo's sister, Bea, joined The Unity Project, leaving Lo in the care of their great aunt. Thanks to its extensive charitable work and community outreach, The Unity Project has won the hearts and minds of most in the Upstate New York region, but Lo knows there's more to the group than meets the eye.
Notes: a book about a journalist trying to learn more about the cult who took her sister from her. If you have siblings, this one hurts even more than if you don't. This has a frick ton of triggers, so please look into that before picking this up.
These Witches Don't Burn by Isabel Sterling
Hannah spends most of her time avoiding her ex-girlfriend (and fellow Elemental Witch) Veronica, hanging out with her best friend, and working at the Fly By Night Cauldron selling candles and crystals to tourists, goths, and local Wiccans. 
Hannah spends most of her time avoiding her ex-girlfriend (and fellow Elemental Witch) Veronica, hanging out with her best friend, and working at the Fly By Night Cauldron selling candles and crystals to tourists, goths, and local Wiccans. 
But dealing with her ex is the least of Hannah's concerns when a terrifying blood ritual interrupts the end-of-school-year bonfire.
Notes: a queer witch book with plenty of action and magic throughout! This book is so important to me and I'm currently reading the second and final book!
The Beekeeper's Apprentice by Laurie R. King
Long retired, Sherlock Holmes quietly pursues his study of honeybee behavior on the Sussex Downs. He never imagines he would encounter anyone whose intellect matched his own, much less an audacious teenage girl with a penchant for detection.
Notes: one of my mom's favorites and this is one of the best mysteries I've ever read!
The Devouring Gray by Christine Lynn Herman
On the edge of town a beast haunts the woods, trapped in the Gray, its bonds loosening…
Notes: this author has been involved in some not great things involving being anti semetic (I hope I spelled that right), so if you still want to read this, please don't do it in a way that financially supports her. That being said, I read it before that stuff came out, and I liken it to a queer Teen Wolf season 3 type story.
The Cheerleaders by Kara Thomas
First there was the car accident—two girls gone after hitting a tree on a rainy night. Not long after, the murders happened. Those two girls were killed by the man next door. The police shot him, so no one will ever know why he did it. Monica’s sister was the last cheerleader to die. After her suicide, Sunnybrook High disbanded the cheer squad. No one wanted to be reminded of the girls they lost. ...
Notes: an amazing murder mystery and one that I highly recommend! A bit slow at times, but the fast scenes make up for it.
The Assassin Game by Kristy McKay
At Cate's isolated boarding school Killer is more than a game-it's an elite secret society. Members must avoid being "killed" during a series of thrilling pranks-and only the Game Master knows who the "killer" is. When Cate's finally invited to join The Guild of Assassins, she knows it's her ticket to finally feeling like she belongs.
Notes: this takes place on an small island near Wales and it's one of the most atmospheric books I've ever read! The first chapter is really nasty, but after that, it's so good!
Two Can Keep a Secret by Karen. M McMannis
Echo Ridge is small-town America. Ellery's never been there, but she's heard all about it. Her aunt went missing there at age seventeen. And only five years ago, a homecoming queen put the town on the map when she was killed. Now Ellery has to move there to live with a grandmother she barely knows.
Notes: this was like reading a CW show. That's all I can say about it.
The Spiderwick Chronicles by Holly Black and Tony DiTerlizzi
Jared, Simon and Mallory, who finds a mysterious Field Guide hidden in the attic, written by their great-great-uncle Arthur Spiderwick, who studied Faeries — magical beings who hide themselves from Humans using a type of magic called glamour.
Notes: I can't say much about this because I barely remember it. But I remember it freaking the crap out of me.
Fics (all of these are MCU)
Pumpkins and Stitches and Monster Mash by @marvelous-writer
Notes: I told myself to pick one fic from one writer, but with Marvelous-Writer, I just couldn't do it. I'm not gonna give synopsis' for the fics, because you really just need to take my word for it and read them.
too sick for clowns by @hailing-stars
Notes: short and sweet. Hailing-Stars is an icon and everyone needs to follow her.
Vein Drain by @ciaconna on Ao3
Notes: absolutely fantastic and humorous.
Trick Or Treat (Or Traumatize) by @awesomesockes and @whumphoarder
Notes: I just freaking love this writing duo.
No doubts about it by @angels-creative
Notes: my queen, my bestie, and the fic she had to send me the link to cause I couldn't find it XD
And I think that's all for this year! Have a safe and happy Halloween everyone!
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