Tumgik
#i'm not putting this in any tags but i bet y'all immediately knew who they are lmfaoooo
planetlunaa · 8 months
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𝚃𝙷𝙴𝙴 𝙿𝚁𝙴𝚃𝚃𝚈 𝙿𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙲𝙴𝚂𝚂
character: Kirishima x Rock Angelz Yasmin - coded Black!Fem reader
synopsis: Kirishima loves his Little Rock Angel
note: full collab for @mypimpademia 3k event
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he's in awe of you. like you constantly blow him away and he just can't believe you exist most of the time
you were introduced to him when Bunny Boo insisted that the rest of the Bratz hang out with her boyfriend's friend group. he was initially a little shy around you which made you all the more attracted to him.
"hey yo Bunny Boo, who's that," you say cocking your head towards the pretty boy with crimson hair across the room from you
"oh girl that's kirishima he's totally harmless," she speaks chuckling at your apprehension to the handsome stranger
he's like full package husband material - kind, compassionate, caring, a little awkward, and fine as hell. who could ask for more. so you take to flirting with him almost immediately in your own witty little way. of course he's oblivious of it, he's too busy trying not to fumble around you
"kiri I've heard you're a big fan of the band, do you have a favorite song," you say to the boy you've decided on antagonizing with your charm
"hmm probably Nobody's Girl," he replies a noticeable smirk in his tone
"interesting," you teased admittedly a bit taken back by his straightforwardness
what's crazier is that he's been a fan of the band since y'all's real obscure days before the Rock Angelz were the Rock Angelz. so imagine his surprise when his best friend starts dating of one the singers and as fate would have it so would he
he's always with you whenever its around showtime. helping you fix your hair, finding outfits for you and your crew, cheering you on, and calming your anxiety (if you happen to have any at the moment). heavy on the cheering you on though. since he's been a fan of the band for so long he knows every song even the old unreleased ones.
he's always on the sidelines just watching you like you're some kind of divine being that stumbled into his life. he's actually really attached to your music which only enhances his relationship with you. helps out with the songwriting and adds elements to the mixing whenever you're stuck. you're a logical thinker so you put him to work on making remixes of your top hits - Island mix, Afro mix, etc. he has all this creativity might as well put it somewhere right
"you look amazing baby," he mutters in between soft good luck kisses on your temple trailing his hands over the ends of your current costume
you break away from him to spin around a bit before jumping into his arms, "thank you love, m' gonna rock this thanks to you"
your own little tradition trapped in your own little world ignorant to the anticipant screams of your adoring fans
because he's your cheerleader and you're his pretty princess
"nah that was all you you're the superstar," he chuckles before setting you down to rush out to your fans
also he's quite literally built like a brick wall so its safe to say that no one gets to you unless you say so. he tries so hard. not to be mean about it but he does have to shove people out of your way whenever they overstep your boundaries. he's such a sweetheart all you hear is, "i'm sorry but please move before I have to tackle you." between him and bakugo, they might as well put the band's security out of a job
he helps you out like a little assistant lol. oh you're planning an outfit concept bet he's over there like I think an afro with baby breath in it will go great with the soft rock concept. like boy where did you learn it from. or I saw this makeup look on Rico Nasty and I thought you could recreate it
speaking of looks, he loves to tag along when you shop with the girls. kirishima is a simple man when he goes shopping it’s a in and out trip. he never knew that shopping could be classified as a sport until he met you, Bunny Boo, Angel, Roxxi, and Kool Kat. he mostly tags along so he can buy you anything you even glance and put anything he thinks you might like on a future list of things to buy you. he’s a spoiler it’s in his dna I fear. but it really is like an olympic sport with y’all, running around finding any and everything to add to an outfit. sometimes he’ll wonder how you’ll work a piece into your semi bohemian alternative style but he’s learned to trust the process.
his kindness to you is always paid for in your own form of appreciation for him. you care for this boy so damn bad it makes you wanna scream at the top of your fucking lungs. on a more civilized note, you’ve written and dedicated many songs to him on multiple occasions. you bandage him from his little hero missions and support him anyway you can. mostly in really intense kisses but hey that’s a win win situation. plus you’re always keeping an eye on him and making sure he’s not exhausting himself which is kinda built into his superhero complex. he’s not hard to love, well not to you but then again maybe it is a job for just you.
sometimes though the grandness of it all does get to you. after all it is a lot. a lot of people, pressure, expectations, and you're only human. kirishima does not hesitate to give you his all in times like this. he really doesn't like leaving you alone in times like this because thats when your anxiety consumes you the most. he just opts for sitting you in his lap and saying affirmations to you. it grounds you, lets you know that he does care, and that you are in fact capable of doing you. screw everyone else
between sets he keeps the mood light by convincing you to do silly tiktoks with him and making sure you're fed. everyone loves him its really a red flag if you don't because what's wrong with you. the other Bratz love him to death he's so caring it sickening. checks on them, gets them snacks, and tells them their doing a great job. he's like a middle aged dad it so cute lol.
your fans love him even the male ones which is especially shocking. there's mad compilations of him just rocking out on the sidelines and being completely oblivious to the fact that most fans can see him. even more so there are compilations of y'all being extremely cute on and off stage - him brushing a hair out of your face, getting you water, goofily singing off beat on purpose. he hangs with the fans from time to time too. just pops in says hi and asks them how they're enjoying the show. during break one time you had to pry him away from another fan who happened to be a Crimson Riot stan. they just wouldn't shut up but he's definitely the type to make friends everywhere
though there was this one particularly stubborn heckler who had to be removed because he was trying to convince you that he would be a “better” boyfriend. it didn’t end particularly well
"YOU SHOULD DUMP THAT LAME FUCK YOU'RE WITH PRINCESS," heckles a random stranger in the crowd.
you signal someone to stop the music and usher in security to remove him but you can't help asking "what was that?"
you know it's wrong to antagonize a heckler but what's the harm right?
"BE WITH ME," he shouts trying to escape security by moving around the crowd
your solution to this is to drag your very pretty boyfriend on stage and wrap your arms around him
"why would I do that," you laugh your head resting against kirishima's bicep, "i mean giving up my boo for a sewer rat reincarnated is kinda crazy to think about"
the whole crowd bursts out into loud boisterous laughter combined with persistent boos as security captures the crazed fam
eventually you plant a kiss on kiri's cheek leaving behind a mark of golden glitter lip gloss and get to rocking again
• kirishima wanted really badly to be the one to handle the situation but he knows you like the back of his hand so he trusted the process
• after all he’s your man and your gonna stick beside him, rockstar or not
tags: @mypimpademia @miirene @dojathascammer @fairestinthelibrary @katsumox @katsuphobic @pnkweb @jogeto @adoremvney
thank you for visiting planetlunaa………
© planetlunaa tumblr 2023. all rights reserved
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luvrlixie · 3 years
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KILLING ME SOFTLY
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【REQUESTED】 - OKAY OKAY SJDBJSISH I WAS GONNA REQUEST A SKZ SEEING YOU IN THEIR CLOTHES OR SOMETHING BUT THEN I STARTED THINKING ABOUT BINNIE SEEING YOU IN SHORT SHORTS AND HIS SHIRT WHICH IS LIKE HUGE ON YOU (ALSO THIS MAN IS DEF A THIGH GUY) AND MY MAN GOES F E R A L. SO. YOU LET HIM RIDE YOUR THIGH <33333
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tags: changbin x gn! reader, soft dom reader, thigh riding/dry humping, very soft, exhibitionism????????? idk they aren't alone in the dorm but no one walks in. not a lot of smut sorry y'all </3 mostly just sappy emotions.. but still nsfw... lit rally wrote at 4am and don't feel like editing lmaoo
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"seriously binnie! if you're gonna spend so much money on clothes, you should at least wear them. you have so many cute sweaters and the fact that they're collecting dust in the back of your closet is a crime."
changbin sat up and peered over the back of the couch as you entered the room. he was ready to shoot back a snarky comment but his words died on his tongue as soon as he saw you.
you stopped by the studio to visit him earlier, where he and the rest of 3racha were working on a track for the next album. you hadn't planned on staying long since you knew your boyfriend would be busy. but about 20 minutes after showing up chan was ushering everyone else out of the room, claiming that he had everything he needed from the other boys for now and that they both deserved a night off. any worries you or changbin might have had about chan overworking himself were immediately replaced by the realization that the two of you would finally have some time alone.
and that brought you to where you were now. standing in front of a blushing boy, wearing shorts and a long shirt of his that completely hid said shorts. you had decided to change after your boyfriend proposed that you spend the night. (at the time he was excited for movies and cuddles, but now it was an offer that he was starting to regret as he could already feel himself growing hard). the shirt you wore was one that changbin never put on due to it's size, he didn't think the whole oversized clothes style was really his thing.
but holy fuck it was yours.
"you uh- you look good."
changbin swallowed and you squinted. he was always a sucker for you wearing his clothes, but it was still odd for him to be turning so red just from seeing you in an shirt of his. luckily it didn't take long for you to notice the way his eyes wouldn't meet yours since they were focused on a different part of your body. you couldn't help but let out a little giggle. seeing you in his clothes might make him weak, but his biggest weakness was your thighs. he'd never exactly talked about your thighs in particular, but it was something that you had picked up on as your relationship progressed. you couldn't help but notice how changbin was always making sure to leave little marks on the inside of your thighs, and would jump at the chance to lay between them when he got sleepy, and how he would often pull out just in time to paint your thighs with his cum.
"like what you see?" you asked playfully as you took a few steps forward so you were standing in front of him.
"like what i- fuck yes... you're gonna be the death of me y/n."
you hummed in amusement, loving the affected you had on your boyfriend, and tangled a hand in his hair so you could guide him forward and let him press kisses on your thighs.
"mm seriously, on my gravestone it's gonna say your name after cause of death" changbin breathed out as he happily trailed his lips over your skin.
"that makes it sound like I murdered you, I'm not a fan of that"
you stood there for a few more minutes. finally moving away once you sensed that changbin was growing impatient. although you loved making your boyfriend beg, now was not that time for that. even though you moved to sit down next to him, changbin whined when you stepped away. knowing you, the poor boy was worried that you were gonna make him suffer through the whole movie with a boner. however, you had much different plans in mind for tonight.
with a smile, you slid a hand between his legs. "such a pretty noise, that little whine. wanna make it again for me?"
changbin's mouth went dry, he opened it to say something but nothing would come out. how were you always able to make him speechless? he did want to make that noise for you again. he wanted you to coo over how cute he sounded, but not here. not in the living room with minho still tucked away in his room, and with hyunjin and seungmin who were expected back at any minute.
"please, please let's go to my room. I need you."
you shook your head and started palming at chnagbin's crotch through his sweatpants, making his body go slack. "shh baby it's okay, calm down. I was just gonna let you grind against my thigh, let you get off like that. we'll be fully clothed so if anyone walks in it'll be pretty easy to play it off as cuddling or a makeout session."
that seemed to be all the reassurance that changbin needed. the way you were touching him paired with your soft voice was making his head spin. all he was focused on now was making you happy and chasing his orgasm. not even a second went by until he was moving onto your lap so he was facing you and straddling one of your legs.
"there you go! good boy."
you helped him settle into a comfortable position and pulled him close so his chest was pressed against yours and his face was buried in your neck. as changbin started to move his hips, you continued whispering words of encouragement and gentle praises since you could feel how tense he had gotten. changbin hadn't exactly done this before. and although the whole thing seemed rather self explanatory and he had gotten off by rutting against a pillow multiple times, he felt a bit self conscious with you watching his every move.
"It's okay bunny, there's no right or wrong way to do this. just whatever feels good." you whispered soothingly into his ear, catching the nervous look in his eyes and the way his movements kept faltering.
it was silly of him to be nervous, he realized. the safest he had ever felt was with you, and over the course of your relationship you had both tried out plenty of new things together (both in and out of the bedroom). thigh riding? this was nothing, you had certainly seen him in much more embarassing situations. so changbin nodded and finally started settling into a steady pace, trusting your words entirely.
every drag of his cock elicited a soft ah sound from the dark haired boy. luckily, you didn't have to worry about him being too loud. he was vocal and made plenty of noise, but always quiet whimpers and soft choruses of "oh"s. you could get him to be loud if you wanted to, you knew how. for now the tiny noises he was making was more than enough to satisfy you as you played with his hair and peppered his forehead with kisses. "there you go bun, bet it feels so good huh?" as you spoke you pressed your leg upwards, applying extra pressure to the whimpering boy's cock. the gasp he let out made your eyes widen in entertainment and you repeated the action, taking pleasure in how he squirmed everytime. "keep going little slut, don't slow down. doesn't my bunny wanna make a pretty mess for me?"
"m-more'" changbin panted.
normally you'd chastise him for not saying please. but right now you honestly couldn't care less. you just wanted your boyfriend to feel loved. wanted him to be as proud of himself as you are of him. so you smiled and pressed your leg up again, hands gripping onto his hips so that you can help guide his movements. "that song you were working on when I visited sounded so good. I know you've been working so hard on it. you're so talented baby, so amazing." changbin let out a sort of strangled noise and tightened his arms around you, pulling himself as close to you as he could get. the absence of words didn't bother you. sometimes changbin babbled on and on while you ruined him, telling you how good he felt and how much he loved you. while other times he just clings onto you, settling on a variety of whines to communicate. both were good.
as the familiar tightness grew in changbin's body, he focused on following the push and pull of your arms. if it wasn't for you guiding him he would have entirely lost his rhythm. knowing that your boyfriend was getting close, you started bouncing your leg and kneading his ass with one hand.
"changbin.. binnie, hey. c'mon let me see your face" you softly prodded, waiting for him to pull back. when he did, your heart squeezed in your chest.
he was so beautiful.
his lips were parted and his bottom lip was glossy and red from biting down on it too hard. his hair was sticking out in a few places, and his eyes were so full of pleasure. you could tell from the glassy look that changbin wasn't entirely present, his thoughts were elsewhere.
"m'gonna..." changbin slurred, hips twitching and back arching. you caught on immediately and softly grabbed his chin to make sure he didn't hide his face again, you always loved to see his face screw up as he comes. this time was no different.
"good boy, good boy let it all out for me"
you helped him ride out his orgasm and leaned forward to kiss him. not even caring that the kiss was messy and mostly just teeth since changbin was panting far too heavily to give you a proper kiss. when changbin's orgasm had finished washing through his body, you let him crash back into your chest. as you waited for him to catch his breath you rubbed his back and buried your face in his hair, giving him time to compose himself before talking.
"I love you binnie"
"..love you too y/n ... but seriously you're way too hot ... gonna die from sexiness overload"
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Welcome Home Part 4
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Summary: Winter is here. Peyton has her match against Shida, Kenny has his match against Moxley, Brandi shares some information with Peyton.
Pairings: Cody Rhodes x OFC (Sister), Brandi Rhodes x OFC (sister), Kenny Omega x OFC
WARNINGS: 18+, explicit language, allusions to smut, a heated make out sesh, heel turn.
Word: 1,957
A/N: y'all i'm sorry this took so long. I hope this is as good as the other parts. <3
Tonight was the night. “Winter is Coming” had an action packed card. There was a rumor going around that someone was making their AEW debut, but only a certain few knew who. (Here's a hint: IT'S STIIIIIIIIIING).
My match against Shida was after Cody’s tag match with Darby against Team Taz. Brandi and I watched the AEW Dynamite Diamond Ring Battle Royal as I prepped, put my gear on and stretched. I rolled my eyes watching as MJF weaseled his way into a win. “One day, Wardlow is going to kick his ass.” I bet as I turned to Brandi. She nodded in agreement. She had been acting different lately. “You alright, sis? You seem off.” I asked her, genuinely concerned.
Brandi looked around the office space we were in, before getting up to close the door. “You can’t say anything, especially to Cody.” She made me promise before continuing. She was starting to scare me. “I’m pregnant.” She beamed, pulling a scan photo out of her bag.
My jaw dropped, eyes wide open. “I’m gonna be an aunt again?!” I all but squealed, taking the black and white photo from her. “Brandi, that’s so exciting! I know how much you guys have been wanting this.” She enveloped me in a hug.
“I haven’t came up with the best way to tell Cody yet, but it’s gonna be this weekend. So, you won’t have to keep the secret for long.” Brandi was positively glowing. This was the best news to get right before my match.
“Thank you for trusting me. I can’t believe this. It’s gonna bring me good luck, I just know it.” I smiled, hugging her again. A knock on the door pulled us back to the night at hand. “It’s open.” I yelled.
It was Cody. “You’re up, Pey.” He said as he walked in over to Brandi. “Hi, honey.” He whispered sweetly, giving her a kiss. I mock-gagged telling them to get a room before I left. It was time; My time.
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A twenty minute long, extremely physical match later and I did it. By the skin of my teeth, I was able to get Shida in a roll up. For good measure, I used the bottom rope to my advantage, leveraging more pressure on the pin. Luckily, Rick Knox didn’t see it.
“Here is your winner, and new AEW Women’s Champion, The Dream Killer, Peyton Rhodes.” Justin bellowed into the microphone. The crowd was split between cheers and boos. Tony had met me at the stage.
“Peyton, any comment on the match?” He asked, obviously hinting at the rope thing. I smiled and shook my head.
“What Tony? You mean the match I just won? The one where I became champion? I think it went great.” I flashed him a toothy grin.
“But the rop-”
I cut him off. “Let me stop you right there, Schiavone. I don’t know what you’re talking about. I won that match, fair and square, with blood, sweat, and tears.” I growled into the mic, “Excuse me, I have a celebration to plan.” I stalked off down the heel tunnel. I only had about fifteen minutes before spot with Jon and Kenny.
Shit, I thought. I almost forgot about the conversation a couple of weeks ago. When Cody said he wanted me to turn on Jon, really solidify my heel turn, I didn’t think he’d want me to help take his title. Tony Khan wanted Kenny and I to play a ‘Power Couple’, basically take over the show.
I quickly changed out of my ring gear, back into my street clothes. The black skinny jeans were distressed and paired well with the grey tank top and tight leather vest I had pulled over it. My feet were clad in black combat boots.
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I stood at the Gorilla monitors, watching Kenny’s match. I was still feeling high from winning my match and becoming AEW Women’s champion. I was waiting for my cue from Kenny to rush out. The last few weeks, Kenny had been dropping hints that he was turning heel. Tonight, I was sealing that turn and helping him win the AEW title.
Kenny had climbed to the top rope, looking like he was about to attempt a moonsault, but Jon rushed him. Kenny noticed and jumped to the outside of the ring. I gasped, worried he had landed wrong on his knee. Only relaxing once I saw him jump back up on the apron. Jon hit him with a forearm, knocking him off balance long enough for Jon to slide out of the ring and pull a foot out from under him.
Kenny went face first into the apron. Jon grabbed him, looking like he was going for the paradigm shift, but did a slightly awkward snapdragon into a speaker. Kenny laid there, defenseless. I grabbed my mic, and got ready to run out onto the stage. The ref was trying to keep Jon back, while the ringside medic checked on Kenny.
More referees came out to assess Kenny, and I could tell Jon was getting pissed. He stalked back over and tossed the extras out of the way, trying to get to Kenny. Jon rolled him back into the ring and began pounding on his head. Kenny brought his hands up to protect his head, shooting a signal that only I knew to look out for.
I rushed out the heel tunnel, mic in hand. “Jon, stop. Please, stop.” I begged as I got closer to the ropes. Jon paused, confused as to why I was out there. “He’s down, Mox, stop.”
He moved off of Kenny, walking over to me. “What the hell are you doing?” He asked, throwing his hands up. He turned his back to me, doing Kenny’s signature finger gun gesture. I reached over the top rope, grabbing at his shoulder. He turned angrily, causing me to jump back, strategically dropping the mic into the ring for Kenny. “Get out of here, Peyton!” Jon yelled at me before turning back to Kenny.
I had the referee distracted long enough for Kenny to grab the mic, and smack Jon in the head with it. He had busted Jon wide open, the blood staining his face. Kenny pulled down his knee pad, hitting a V Trigger one, two, three, four times. I was sure Jon was unconscious. Kenny pushed him into a corner, fatigue settling in. He used the turnbuckle as leverage to lift Jon up, preparing for a One Winged Angel. He slammed Jon into the mat with such force, that the entire ring shook. Kenny grabbed one leg, all but laying over Jon, pinning him.
“Here is your winner, and NEW AEW world heavyweight champion, Kenny Omega.” Justin Roberts announced, and the crowd booed. I slid into the ring, taking the title from the ref, giving it to Kenny. I went to raise his hand, instead Kenny pulled me close. One of his hands grabbed the back of my head, pulling me toward him. I froze as his lips met mine. Quickly, after recovering from the shock, I pulled away. Kenny kept me close as he raised the belt. My mind still blank from the kiss, he moved us towards the rope, carefully holding them open for me to step through.
Once we were backstage and out of sight, I turned to face him. “Care to explain what the fuck that was?!” I fumed. Kenny’s face went beet red. He swiped a hand down his face. I knew he was exhausted, but I needed answers.
“Look, I promise I will explain, but Callis has a chopper ready to get me the fuck outta here. Come with me.” He swore, gesturing to the back door. I nodded and let him lead me outside. As we neared the chopper, Alex Marvez stopped Kenny to ask what happened. Callis stepped out of the chopper, telling him that he, along with everyone else, can find out Tuesday on Impact.
They must have anticipated my joining them as I found my duffle, along with my title and phone on the floor of the chopper. The pilot flew us to an undisclosed location, which I soon found out was the landing pad at Kenny's hotel. Callis ran straight to his room, hunkering down from the fall out of tonight's show. Kenny opened the door to his room, gesturing for me to come in. I walked inside, getting comfortable on the couch.
I quickly pulled out my phone, letting Cody know I was with Kenny. He immediately responded stating they were about to send a search party. I huffed out a laugh and Kenny looked over at me.
"I guess I have some explaining to do huh?" He sighed, running his fingers through his blonde curls. I nodded sharply. "I want to apologize first. I shouldn't have kissed you, especially without your permission and I'm truly sorry." He amended, " second, I really wish our first kiss would have been under better circumstances." He smiled sweetly. This man always finding a way to melt my heart.
"I accept your apology, this time Omega." I teased. "What made you do it though?" I asked, unsure if I wanted the answer.
"You know, the adrenaline was coursing through my veins, and there you were looking like a damn angel. And I thought to myself, the only thing that would make this better would be to kiss you. Before I could stop myself, my lips were on yours." Kenny blushed, explaining himself.
The man looked like a damn dream. Still clad in just his wrestling tights, blonde hair a mess of curls, chest red from the hits he took. And to top it all off, his lips looked down right kissable. Only Kenny Omega could look this good after a grueling wrestling match. I thought, smiling to myself. And even though I was upset that our first kiss happened on Live TV with millions watching, I wanted nothing more than for it to happen again.
“Can we get a redo?” The words fell from my lips as a whisper. Kenny’s head snapped up to look at me. He took three big strides to the couch where I was sat, pulling me up to my feet. One of his hands, which I never noticed were so big until they were cupping my face, tilted my mouth up toward his.
Torturously slow, Kenny brought his lips to mine. My eyes fluttered shut as my hands came up to tangle my fingers in his curls. Impossibly, Kenny pulled me closer, causing a small gasp to leave me. He took the opportunity to slide his tongue against my own.
The kiss was sweet, passionate, and full of emotion. When we finally parted to breath, Kenny was the first to speak. “That was,” he stopped, trying to find the right word.
“Breath-taking.” I finished his sentence and he nodded in agreeance. “Ken,” I started. He cut me off by kissing me again. I quickly melted into the kiss. My hands began to roam his body, slipping under the tight T-shirt, feeling the taut muscles of his back.
I pulled away from his intoxicating kiss and pushed him back toward the couch. Once back in a seated position, I straddled him. “Fuck, Pey.” Kenny moaned as my lips attacked his neck. He pulled my face back so that our eyes met. His blue eyes were almost black with desire . “Can’t have you leaving any marks there, princess.” Kenny growled. I cocked a brow and ground my center down on him. Kenny immediately flipped us, so that he was hovering over me. “You’re playing a dangerous game, Princess.” Kenny had started to unzip my vest when we were interrupted by banging on the door.
Tags: @rach-supreme93
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fluidityandgiggles · 5 years
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Sleep Is For The Weak - Chapter 12
Previous Chapters: Prologue, Chapter 1, Chapter 5, Last Chapter
Writing Masterlist - for previous chapters not otherwise linked, Read on AO3
Notes (I guess): Thanks a lot to @ilovemygaydad for updating y’all about my wifi situation, the wifi works semi-well now, and... well...
WRITING THIS CHAPTER WAS HELL AND A HALF AND IM SO GLAD ITS FINALLY FINISHED.
Ahem. Excuse me. I have a couple of very important things to say, though.
If any of you haven't read the latest chapter of Keep Him Safe, which is right here, please go do so. I read it the moment it was posted and... I was at dinner with my family, so I had to hold in my squealing... to be perfectly honest with y'all, I already knew what was going to happen in that chapter since I started writing chapter three, I think...? So I have known about this for a very long time, but it still made me super happy to see it actually happen in writing. So... go read KHS, y'all. You really should. It's awesome.
(Quick update: I checked my screenshots and... yeah, I've known about that since July, which is when I started writing this fic. Again, I've known about what happened in sleep for six months, and surprisingly didn't spoil almost any of it to anyone around me. I deserve a fucking prize.)
To anyone who just came over from Eva's shameless plugging of me - hello, nice to have you here. In this fucked up piece of angst we discuss queer history as well as Remy's personal history, or - as I said to myself while reading and re-reading what Eva has to say about this fic - "well, this story is as much about queer history as it is about Remy, where he came from, where he's going, where he came from cotton eye joey'n". And to anyone who's a regular reader, I'm so glad you're sticking around to read this... this thing. It's become a monster in my head, I can promise you that much.
As always, thanks to @broadwaytheanimatedseries for the original idea, to @whatwashernameagain for the original fic (can you believe it’s been six months since we came up with chapter 23?), to @anony-phangirl and @asleepybisexual and @winglessnymph for the help wherever needed, and a special one to Morgan - again - for helping me get the word out. All of those people are my shining stars and I love them so much.
Tag list (sort of): @bunny222, @ab-artist, @sweet-and-sour-shadowling, @your-username-is-unavailable, @virgilcrofters, @why-things-go-boom, @ilovemygaydad (thanks again, kiddo!), @violetblossem. @maybe-i-like-the-misery, @book-of-charlie, @thatsanswitch
(Wanna be tagged? Just lemme know!)
Trigger warning: period appropriate transphobia (the early 00s were not exactly trans-friendly). This chapter discusses rape again, this time in a bit more detail (nothing graphic, it’ll never be graphic, I promise), and includes a... panic attack of sorts. Be warned.
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January 24th, 2003
Emile's smile faltered.
"...so what if I got raped?" He muttered, putting down the stack of chairs he was holding. "What's done is done. They had their fun—"
"They…?" India tilted her head. Oh shoot… "There was more than one person?"
"More like three… what? Why are you looking at me like—"
The stack India was holding fell to the floor.
"Did you tell anyone?" Emile stared at the floor. Maybe she'll go away if he doesn't cooperate. "Emile! Did you tell anyone?"
"I told the doctors…" Emile's voice faltered. "What's going on?"
"I'm surprised you're even alive right now!" India's pacing was… terrifying. For some reason… she suddenly just… turned so scary. "Mixing date rape drugs with alcohol, which is what I'm assuming happened to you, is so dangerous! And I'm only assuming that's what happened because I heard from Remy that they found GHB traces—"
"I'm not proud," Emile managed to stutter. "Of… all this. I just… I can drink, okay? I made some mistakes in the past—"
"You're seventeen!"
"I made some mistakes in the past, and… this one makes me feel like all those mistakes have been trying to tell me that I shouldn't exist…"
"No… no, peach, please." He already started crying by the time she stepped in to hug him. "I get that. I really do. Sometimes I think about how much better my life might've been if I pretended like I'm 'cured' of being transgender after conversion. My cousin wouldn't have done what she did, that's the biggest plus. But… I wouldn't have come here. I wouldn't have started on my way to become a statistics analyst. I wouldn't have met Jenna. I would probably be living a sad, closeted life back home, and that isn't such a nice thing."
"You were too…?"
"I was too, yeah… as victims, we gotta stick to each other."
The wet spots on India's sweater were getting larger by the second. But she didn't mind it.
"Like I was told when I was sixteen," she said, much quieter than before. "Nobody is going to believe a man who says he was raped. We gotta stick together, whether we like it or not."
——
"Hey, isn't that that friend of yours?" Remy heard behind him about two minutes before the meeting started.
Oh, good.
"Hey, didn't you deliberately choose to forget that I live in the other side of the US from you because you wanted to be a little fuck?" Remy asked back, looking at Chris turn redder than a tomato.
"I swear to god, I had no idea!"
"Suck it and your excuses, Mendez."
"Hey, hey… come on, Remy. Won't you at least let me make it up to you?"
Remy couldn't stay angry… well, he could. But not as angry. It was a stupid reason, too…
"I will." Chris beamed at him. "But it'll take a very long time."
"...you have a week."
"I won't let you down," Chris said with the same wide, obnoxious grin, quickly kissing Remy's cheek and taking a seat.
Fuck him and his obnoxious self.
On the third of January, Remy and Emile sat down on the hotel bed in what was probably the fanciest hotel Remy's ever been to (though he never really visited any hotels in his life, no time or money for that). They were listening to Gustav Holst's The Planets as Emile performed a one-man dramatic reading of No Exit, and Remy couldn't feel more at peace.
This situation right here - all the people, all the tension, Chris right there a few steps away from him - was the exact opposite.
"Do you want me to leave?" A quiet voice said and Remy felt himself being squeezed so tight, he was sure his ribs would crack. Emile. "I can leave if you—"
"Come on, sit next to me," Remy said as quietly and took a rather far seat from Chris. Serves him right.
"Happy Friday, everyone," India opened the meeting. "I see that we got some new people after the break, so we're going to do another name round. Who wants to start?"
Emile raised his hand almost immediately.
"I'm Emile, I'm— do we mention our major?"
"If you want to."
"I'm Emile, I'm a psychology major, and I'm probably gay. Or asexual. I just… don't really know if I'm more gay or asexual yet."
——
Monday, January 27th
"Look, I find some of what you teach suspect," Emile hummed to himself as he skipped behind Remy back to their building after a particularly entertaining sols 20 class. "Because I'm used to relying on intellect, but I try to open up to what I don't know, because reason says I should've died three years ago…"
"Em, stop it," Remy half-laughed. "I get it, you're still thinking about Rent."
"It was such a good show!" Emile whined - well, sort of. "Jai Rodriguez was really good!"
"I met Idina Menzel through this," Remy said with another chuckle. "She's nice… kind of a diva, if you ask me."
"So… like you?"
"What do you mean, like me?"
"Nice, but kind of a diva." Emile nudged him. "I'll bet you she's totally selfless and sweet but acts like she doesn't care about anything in the world—"
"No, actually… she isn't." Remy sighed. The memories were foggy - it was over eight years ago - but… "Dad is working on some project with her again. Her and Kristin Chenoweth…"
"Kristin?" Emile shrieked. "Good golly, I love her! She's so sweet and talented!"
"I'm really not supposed to tell you anything," Remy laughed, and then stopped.
A figure made him freeze at his doorstep. A small, shaking figure, with braided brown hair and an ill-fitting, black, puffy coat.
Leah was rapidly knocking on Remy's suite door.
——
"Why did you think it was a good idea to come here?" Remy asked, careful not to scream. Leah sat in the living room, her hair dripping wet from the shower he made her take, wrapped up in the clothes she brought with her in her lime green schoolbag. She was waiting on her hot chocolate.
"I wanted to."
"How did you even get a bus ticket? You're seven!"
"I took money from mom and went to the bus station!" Leah huffed. "I know where the buses are, and I know how to—"
"I didn't say you don't know, Leah Mae," Remy chastised, putting the cup of hot chocolate on the table quite forcefully. "But you're seven years old! This was incredibly dangerous of you—"
"I don't wanna live at home anymore!" Leah screamed. "Mom was mean all of Christmas, and Lizzie wasn't being nice when we went back to school, she didn't want me to be her friend anymore, and Rachel was annoying—"
"Sweetie, they're going to think I kidnapped you!" Leah was taken aback. Remy was worried to the point of terrifying. "They're going to think I kidnapped you, Leah. It won't end well!"
"I didn't think…" the tears started coming out. Oh shit… "I didn't mean it! I just… I don't like being home! Don't be mad at me!"
"Oh, baby, no, I'm not mad at you!" Remy was quick to take her in for a hug. His poor baby sister… "I'm just worried, Leah. Extremely worried. Never do such a thing ever again, okay?" She nodded in his arms. "There's nothing we can do about this now, but—"
The door opened with a bang, and "I brought the bunnies!"
Leah immediately perked up. Mycroft tried to hop straight into her lap the moment he was close enough, since he already knew her and was very worried for the tiny human, but Lestrade took his time getting to know her. She was new, and he didn't know her yet, and what if she wasn't going to be nice?
"Leah, this is Lestrade," Emile said with a huge smile, closing the door and coming to cuddle them all - Remy included. "He's Mycroft's brother, and I adopted him after Christmas!"
"But you don't celebrate Christmas."
"No I don't, but you do." He booped her nose, making her giggle. "Lestrade is a nice boy. Give him a bit, he'll jump into your lap in no time."
As Leah entertained herself, playing with the bunnies and telling them stories, Remy pulled Emile to the side.
"She ran away from home!"
"I heard that when you asked me to go get the bunnies, Remy."
"She's seven years old! What do I do with a seven-year old runaway? Is it even a thing? A seven-year old runaway?"
Emile kisses Remy's cheek quicker than he could process it happening. "It's going to be fine. Call Linda, let her know that Leah is here—"
"Leah asked me not to tell anyone she's here," Remy sighed, rubbing his face in frustration.
"I understand, but… Linda is still your mom. Leah is still seven years old. She needs to go home, whether you like it or not." When Remy still seemed like he's having trouble processing it, Emile pulled him into a hug. "Do you want me to talk to her about it for you?"
Remy could only say a very weak "yes please" before Emile went back to the couch, to talk to Leah.
He was jittering. He was angry, and scared, and disappointed, and proud, and he felt everything so intensely and was so shocked and confused that he couldn't name it. He barely turned eighteen last July, he didn't even know how to drive yet, and he was absolutely, most definitely, going to be in trouble for this seven-year old child showing up at his door after running away from home.
He wasn't going to call Linda. But he couldn't keep Leah over. And he didn't know shit about raising children, for the period of time he was going to have Leah over, until he figures out what to do. Remy wanted to scream, how much he wanted to. But he couldn't.
So he did the next best thing he could do. He dropped to the floor and started crying.
He was too tired, physically and emotionally, to pick himself back up at that particular moment.
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