#i'm a big simp for these bishes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yourunhingedgirlfriend · 1 year

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Disclaimer: All info posted here comes from their respective creator itself so yes, its legit and not just part of my imagination 💯

Interview Rules:

The interviewer can only ask 10 questions.

The interviewer cannot force an answer out of anyone.

The participant has the right not to elaborate their answer.

CW: Long post ahead / Interviewer being a Ketamine simp / Gavin's surprise cameo

Interviewer: Hi Guys! I hope you're doing well today. Thank you for participating on this social experi- *coughs* interview. Btw, you can call me CC, I'm your interrogator today sent by your beloved MC, so please cooperate :) Are we ready? Lets start:

Question No 1: Aside for being a yandere, whats your dream job/profession?

❤️ Casanova: I wanted to be a chef for the longest time, but i’m happy with my job as an organ harvester!

🕊️ Krow: I-I actually like m-my job as a f-forensics cleaner but... I-I'd love to b-be a stay at home s-spouse a-and just do a-art.

🔪 Ezra: I actually really enjoy my current job. I've had it for going on... 7 years now? Almost 8. (Interviewer: Can we ask what your job is? No? Okay. *thumbs up* bish i value my life more)

🔥 Harper: Hmm, if I had to pick any kind of job, maybe a pyrotechnic?

💐 Keith: To become a plant biologist.

🎮 Tenebris: Be a musician.

🖥️ Virgil: My dream profession is to be Game Developer, I enjoy video games and I have always wanted to make a game for others to enjoy, and so that’s why I’m taking classes of game development.

🎤 Adam: I already have my dream job. Although, I did often think about becoming a vet as a kid. Sometimes I wonder how life would've turned out had I pursued that career instead of singing.

🐕 Henry: I’m not sure! I’ll probably do whatever Buttercup ends up doing!

Interviewer: Atleast some of you love their job *sigh* Me? I just want to be a cat, no work, just meow meow *defeated sigh* Back to the topic at hand:

Question No 2: If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be? (Vacation or permanently)

❤️ Casanova: Barcelona, that’s where i was born and it’s really pretty there

🕊️ Krow: Ah! I-India! I-I'm Indian but... I-I actually don't know m-much about my heritage. I... w-wanna go s-see the land of m-my culture. W-with Dove too o-of course!

🔪 Ezra: Hmm... Anywhere with my Sugarsnap? If that's not too cheesy I suppose. But outside of that I'd like to visit Blaire's extended family in Vietnam.

🔥 Harper: I’m definitely more a big city kind of guy, so I’m pretty happy living where I am… To visit though? Hmm… Somewhere with some snowy mountains maybe, do some snowboarding, chill by a fire with some hot cocoa? Yeah, that sounds nice..

💐 Keith: It will be Kristenbosh National Botanical Garden.

🎮 Tenebris: My old home probably.

🖥️ Virgil: I’ve always wanted to go Iceland for vacation

🎤 Adam: As long as I'm by your (MC) side, it doesn't matter where I'm at~

🐕 Henry: Anywhere where Buttercup is good with me! But if we could both go somewhere, Disneyland might be fun!

Interviewer: So if MC just dissapear out of nowhere, thats the list of places where we can found them? Hmm ..

Question No 3: Song that you will sing to MC if given a chance.

❤️ Casanova: baby - eslabon armado

🕊️ Krow: Uhhh... uhhh... I-I guess... T-Together Forever would be c-cute...

🔪 Ezra: A few different songs, most notably... We'll never have sex by Leith Ross, Let you break my heart again by Laufey & Philharmonia or Habits by Genevieve Stokes. I just want sugar to know I want them for more than... anything. I love their heart and soul, it's not physical for me. Though I do find them incredibly attractive.

🔥 Harper: Actually sing myself?... Umm.. Maybe either Day 1 or No Song Without You, both by Honne?

💐 Keith: Can't Help Falling in Love

🎮 Tenebris: Trust by 7 Seconds

🖥️ Virgil: Rises the Moon, it’s a comfort song of mine, my mum sings this to me and my younger siblings when we were little, by then whenever my mother is busy, I sing the song to my siblings. And Hopefully, I can sing it to my beloved, as a way to help them if they need comfort.

🎤 Adam: *fidgeting because he's written one song in particular that he'd love for MC to hear but is worried that MC will wind up hating it*

🐕 Henry: The Promise by When in Rome! It’s our song!

Interviewer: *secretly adding all the songs to their playlist*

Question No 4: Name one food that you will never ever eat.

❤️ Casanova: Mac and cheese, i fucking hate mac and cheese.

🕊️ Krow: I-I'm never... eating b-bland... white people c-cooking EVER a-again.

🔪 Ezra: Beans on toast. I just don't particularly like beans. Or sweet potatoes.

🔥 Harper: Ugh… Raisins

💐 Keith: Rabbit meat.

🎮 Tenebris: Anything with bugs.

🖥️ Virgil: Anything fish related, I do not like fish, but if someone ever served me, I would just suck it up and eat.

🎤 Adam: *doing 5 stages of disgusted face known to humankind* Anything from Saffrons freezer. (Interviewer: Time to raid Saffron's freezer hehehe)

🐕 Henry: I can’t bring myself to eat cauliflower. It's so bland!

Interviewer: *proceed to eat Mac & Cheese to spite Nova* I dont trust people who hates Mac & Cheese.

Question No 5: This would be a little bit of personal, so you have a choice not to answer this okay? Whats your most treasured possession?

❤️ Casanova: Mi vida’s house key, of course! it’s a little mangled bc i keep chewing on it though.

🕊️ Krow: Oh... w-well... t-this pendant is... p-precious but... well... I-I actually don't have m-many possessions. S-so... everything I have has m-meaning. (Interviewer: I can be your possession Krow)

🔪 Ezra: Eliana gave me a tie she made back in elementary school. Neither of our dads are in the picture so she gave it to me instead. I still wear it to work sometimes. (Interviewer: *starts crying bc this answer is so precious*)

🔥 Harper: This lighter here, we have a bit of history together~

💐 Keith: A bonsai tree I got from my father and I had for 7 years.

🎮 Tenebris: My guitar.

🖥️ Virgil: My necklace, it’s a gift from my dad.

🎤 Adam: You (MC). But if we're talking about an item...*he tugs on his earring*

🐕 Henry: A picture / polaroid of me + Buttercup as kids! (though, I do have more updated ones too…)

Interviewer: I am suprised no one answered MC's nose hair or whatever. Hmm.. Im not fully convinced but I will trust you on this one.

Question No 6: Nosy ask, whats your phone wallpaper right now?

❤️ Casanova: a photo of mi vida in the middle of taking their meds!

🕊️ Krow: D-Dove let us t-take a selfie! I-it's so cute aaaa--

🔪 Ezra: I managed to snap a photo of Sugar and Ellie cuddled up on the couch after a movie night once. I've never before felt so much love swelling in my chest. It almost hurt.

🔥 Harper: *proudly present his phone* 1st is my lockscreen and 2nd is my Homescreen. I took it myself..

💐 Keith: A pair of white lilies (Why is this the most normal answer on this whole interview?)

🎮 Tenebris: We share the same phone, so a pair of white lillies also.

🖥️ Virgil: Pixel art of my beloved Galaxy and my puppy Scott, aren’t they so cute in pixel form? (Interviewer: Scotty baby *coos at the phone* )

🎤 Adam: My home screen is of YOU (MC). My lock screen is of a stray kitten I found on my way to the studio that Ethans younger brother ended up taking in. (Interviewer: Do you have any other pics of the kitten? *cat lady vibes intensifies*)

🐕 Henry: A picture of Buttercup sleeping! How’d I get it? (Note: Its in a modern Au bc mobile phone with camera is not yet invented on Henry's time)

Interviewer: MC supremacy yass! If only some surgeon named Ketamine Yetrovzski use my photo as his wallpaper *coughs* (Ketamine shouting "NO" can be heard in the background but still here supporting the interviewer, this fuckin tsundere)

Question No 7: If you could appear in any popular movie/anime/book, which one would you choose?

❤️ Casanova: hmm, i would say the hp lovecraft series! hate the guy but i’m a major monster fucker

🕊️ Krow: Umm... I... I-I wanna be in a Jane A-Austen book. As a p-protagonist. N-no matter what... t-they marry happily in t-the end.

🔪 Ezra: Well... I guess... I'm not sure. I've never really thought about it. I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. I can't imagine my life without Eliana and I don't want to be anywhere without my sugarcube.

🔥 Harper: Ah.. thats a hard one.. If I get powers n shit and I’m not just a normal person maybe Jujutsu Kaisen?... Tbh I play more games than I do watch or read anything haha..

💐 Keith: Sherlock Holmes, because solving murder cases looks like fun. So does creating the perfect murder. *a sudden smoke appear near Keith for dramatic effect*

🎮 Tenebris: Inuyasha. I really want a Kagome. (Interviewer putting their Kagome costume)

🖥️ Virgil: Hmmmm that’s a tough one… Haha I couldn’t think of anything right now.

🎤 Adam: Death note, the anime. I think I could do a lot better with that notebook than light Yagami did. (Hermit, the creator, rolls their eyes behind the scenes and Adam glaring daggers to Hermit)

🐕 Henry: The Princess Bride! That movie is practically about me + Buttercup.

Interviewer: Im with Harper on this one. JJK so I cant prevent Nanami and Nobara Shibuya Arc huhuhu.

Question No 8 : What are some habits you have? Any strange ones?

❤️ Casanova: I tend to scratch at my braces when i’m trying to focus, often i’d end up chewing on my fingers.

🕊️ Krow: Uhh.... I... bite my h-hands... a lot. It's... a comfort t-thing. S-sometimes my forearms too. I-I guess I also make the same expression a-as to what I'm d-drawing.

🔪 Ezra: When eating food like burgers or sandwiches I eat around the edge and then eat the center last. Um... I also tend to rub things with my fingertips when I don't know what to do with my hands. I'm almost always touching my nails absent-mindedly.

🔥 Harper: I have a habit of scratching my fingertips, especially when I’m nervous… Its kinda a bad habit, sometimes I scratch em a little raw.

💐 Keith: Buttoning and unbuttoning my shirt sleeve when Im bored or nervous.

🎮 Tenebris: Leaving my things all over the bed

🖥️ Virgil: Hmmmm, whenever I play a video game that has levels right? And I messed up one thing, I restart the level. Don’t know why, I just like to go through the levels smoothly. It’s pretty frustrating if you ask me ahaha

🎤 Adam: I don't have any strange habits. I'm just a normal guy. (Someone shouts LIAR and its not Hermit, i swear. Or maybe?)

🐕 Henry: Hmmm…I have really bad sleeping habits if I’m being honest! I’m lucky if I can get 3 hours of sleep at night. As for strange ones, nope, I’m perfectly normal! (now the interviewer is also shouting LIAR)

Interviewer: That was the biggest lie Ive ever heard in my entire life Henry. *headache incoming* No one is normal here. Im not even normal smh.

Question No 9: This question was submitted by Gavin Hyeon of Camp Willlow Peak. Its time to test your flirting skill, give me one pick up line that you will probably use when flirting with MC. Gavin said he is watching you right now.

❤️ Casanova: if you were a heart i’d eat you out!

🕊️ Krow: N-no wonder i-it's overcast t-today. All t-the colors are in y-your eyes.

🔪 Ezra: Sometimes I wonder what good deed I did to deserve such a perfect soul like you to enter my life.

🔥 Harper: Pickup lines really aren’t my thing… Gavin did write down this one for me once though… Lets see it’s here somewhere…” *digs through his pockets and pulls out a piece of scrap paper* “Here it is… ‘Hey baby… You got any Italian in you?.. No?... Do you want some?’ …… I don’t get it 😐 *Gavin cheering in the background*

💐 Keith: Im really not a fan of pickup lines, but okay, "You're sweet enough to give me diabetes".

🎮 Tenebris: Tie your shoelaces, I don't want you falling for someone else!" (Legend says that until now, Tenebris is still waiting for MC to wear shoelaces and for them to be untied.)

🖥️ Virgil: Hmmm let me go grab my telescope, so I can admire the beautiful star.

🎤 Adam: *combusts into one giant human blush* (Hermit doing a voice over: He can only flirt on the fly. If he has to think his actions through he'll get self conscious and overheat from overthinking it)

🐕 Henry: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put ‘U’ and ‘I’ together!

Interviewer: *currently helping Gavin to write his will of testament before he becomes Gavin Flavored Toasted Marshmallow, recipe by Harper*

Question No 10: This would be the last question, and I want to thank you again for giving me a chance to interview you. Before we end this, do you have anything you want to say to the people reading this?

❤️ Casanova: if you ever need fresh organs without having to do it yourself contact valentine’s anatomy distribution! we have a wide selection available, and if you’re a fellow yandere homie you get a discount!

🕊️ Krow: Uhh, well? I-I guess... t-thank you for... f-finding me interesting.

🔪 Ezra: Not particularly. I'm not sure why Lilith arranged the interview but I don't mind answering questions. I should probably head back into work soon though... Oh, I will say this. Thank you for coming into my life Sugar, I didn't think I could love someone like I love you.

🔥 Harper: .. Unshrimp your fucking backs, love you~

💐 Keith: Um, hello. I hope my answers weren't too boring.

🎮 Tenebris: No? I don't know 'em.

🖥️ Virgil: Hello everyone, I hope all of you have a wonderful day, afternoon, or night, make sure to take care of yourselves or else I will if you don’t mind hehe~

🎤 Adam: Is...YOU (MC) reading this? Because if you are, I hope to see you again really soon~

🐕 Henry: You guys are kinda weird for wanting an interview! I’m not quite sure what else to say though!

Interviewer: And that would be all. Thank you to our lovely guests for joining us today. And here is the bribe. List of all 2d characters MC currently simping for. Do what you want with that info.

Interviewer: Hi Hi guys! Again, CC here. Thank you again for entertaining this interview. To end this, may we ask for a few advices you can give for those aspiring artist out there or those who want to create their own vn.

NOVA belongs to @cannibalsweetheart : if you’re starting a project don’t feel unmotivated if you don’t get a lot of traction in the first few weeks, building a platform takes time, but soon enough you’ll gain an audience! (Demo link here)

Krow belongs to @thekrows-nest : While I don't have immediate plans for a VN (despite folks begging for it), for artist stuff, keep experimenting and trying out things. Don't be afraid to go to friends for advice. (:

Ezra belongs to @restartheartvn : lshdfksdfhj okay for my answer! My advice? Don't make something for other people. Make what YOU want to see. Make something that YOU are interested in. If you like... make something that you don't love and enjoy making people can tell. It doesn't come off as genuine and you'll burn out that way. Don't think about numbers or anything like that. Make stuff because it makes you happy. I make Restart Heart because I love my little passion project. I love it so much I get my nails done to match my game and spend most of the day thinking about it. I would still be making Restart Heart if no one played. Make something that you would want to make even if no one saw. Even if you were the only person in the world who loves it, make it because it brings you happiness. Sorry if that's cheesy or like super standard but it's genuine. (Demo link here)

Harper belongs to @campwillowpeak : Hmmm, other than the good ol’ practice practice practice?…Try and remember to have fun yeah? Don’t focus on numbers, yeah everyone wants more eyes on their work, thats normal, but if you focus only on how big you are you’re gonna burn out and get discouraged, stuff like that takes time, consistency, and a little bit of luck. In the meantime just have fun and make friends! Besides, people can tell if you’re trying to force it, an audience’ll more often stay if they can tell you’re legitimately having fun! And never just look at where you are now… Look at how far you’ve come from too!~

Keith & Tenebris belongs to @dualityvn : Make sure you set realistic goals for yourself. Taking on too many tasks and planning a project that is bigger than what you can currently manage can be your downfall. Stay positive and always create the things you yourself love! (Demo link here)

Virgil belongs to @wouldyoustayvn : Take your time! There’s no need to rush to make the game quickly! Make sure to take breaks!))

Adam belongs to @unknownhermit : Please get a good chair. It'll help in the long run when you're often crouched over your desk for hours on end. Don't be like me who hovers over my desk like a hermit crab shell.😅 Second thing is to just have fun creating and don't worry about what others think! I used to obsessively worry if my work was good enough and wound up never releasing it because I got self conscious. It wasn't until YOU and HIM that I actually had fun with what I was doing and I think that translated into my work. Create to create for yourself. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks because it's important to create what you love and are passionate about. And I'm sure a lot of us would love to see what sorts of things you'll come up with. 💙 (Demo link here)

Henry belongs to @homecomingvn : Ahh, I’m a really bad person to ask for advice if I’m being honest! I guess all I can really say is that no matter how silly you think your idea is, there will be an audience for it! It can be scary to put yourself out there, but honestly, this community is so incredibly supportive + I’ve met some amazing people here! Also, I’d recommend keeping various docs about your project! It’s nice to have it all in one (or 3 + a google slides in my case) place so you can have a clear idea about your wip + its characters. And lastly, be prepared for people to be horny! ^^ (okay, you dont have to call me out >…< will still send horny ask bc someone needs to 😙)

Just a little self indulgent ramblings. I dont know if anyone already know about this game, but one of my moots recommended this, its DONT LOOK VN and I tell you, its so good. The story premise, the creepy atmosphere and the voice acting are all on point. They have on going Kickstarter and they only have 8 days left to reach the goal. This is my way of helping since im unable to pledge bc the banks here in the country im currently residing are shitty and they keep declining, so please if you have means to support, please do. Lets help them to reach their goals.

Here is the link of the demo also and their socials:

Kickstarter | Demo | Twitter | Tumblr

DO IT FOR CHESTER!!

#camp willowpeak #restart heart #cannibal sweetheart #yandere #duality keith #duality tenebris #yandere male #the krow's nest #you and him #would you stay vn #homecoming vn #Yandere Interview #dont look vn #Please support Dont Look Vn

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stretchyyonko · 5 months

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I just started one piece last month and I'm currently STILL ON ENNIES LOBBY...since I'm busy on school works and etc.

And here I am reacting to one piece Men I have been spoiled nor encountered in spoilers and mostly Tiktok and twitter. ( Part 01 )

1st up OF COURSE IT'S LUFFY

- THIS BISH RIGHT HERE REALLY MADE ME WATCH ONE PIECE AND SIMP FOR HIM LIKE HOW BOA AND BARTOLOMEO DO IT😭 like bro how can you not...(except the pre-timeskip 'cause I don't the FBI banging up at my door)

- Plus the way he never kills his enemies and him being dense asf funny to me, not to mention him having ADHD IS WAY TO FUCKING ACCURATE...

- AND HE'S TOO FUCKING INNOCENT ASF SKRKGKSNSNAAAAAAAA I just wanna keep him in my pocket and watch him smile at me like how he do 24/7

- Would 100% marry him (don't worry I'll fix him to go bath everyday even if I got to fight him using gear 5 nor fighting his simps and ships)

- I also love how he don't kill his enemies and just downgrade them like how what he did to bellamy.

2nd the cook and the swordsman

- Man...this two..well...I would not wamt to meddle into their banters like an old married couple...

- STRONG ASF

- To be honest I kinda like the pre time skip sanji but he grew up more fine after 2 years, plus I understand why he got unbearable during fishman island arc since he got isolate to an island full of homosexual people and even got into one LMAO but he slayed those heels and dress tho...

- As same as his captain THIS FUCKING SWORDSMAN ONLY BATHES ONCE A WEEK...SKRKGODJAJRJFJ I CAN'T WITH THE TWO OF THEM 😭. Also don't get me wrong..but I kinda find zoro more cool than simp cause I don't know what's wrong to my brain that I can't find him attractive...yet the way he handles women as equal to him is good to me...I find him funny and cool asf yet I find his captain attractive asf HOW 😭?!

- And the fact that I knew then as a ship first and their fanarts are just insanely good too 😭.

3rd Ace and Sabo

- To be honest the ever 1st one piece episode I had watch on TV when I was on 5th grade was the Amazon Lily episode where Boa simped for luffy and I got intrigued watching it because I kinda thought luffy would accept boa's confession LMAO, and by 6th grade I again catched a glimpse of Ace's death on marineford arc and I was confused at first why he got killed not until today wjen I saw some spoilers (By the way Those episode that I watch is a tagalog dub from a TV Channel in our country) So that's why back in the years that I still haven't watch one piece all I knew was Ace's Death and Boa having a crush on luffy.

- It's funny I learnt sabo from my friend who reads One piece manga where she was ranting to me about sabo and there I got curious and ask her what happened, and there she explained to me that Luffy has another brother which I got surprised cause all I know back then was Ace and there she was crying how handsome sabo was and was also crying because of luffy meeting sabo again. Back then I always thought that these three is brothers by blood and not by alcohol 😭.

- To be honest Ace's visuals back then was hella majestic but funny at the same time but after the re-animation he got babygirly-fied LIKE BRO HIS ANIMATION ON THAT SCENE IN WANO HIS TIDDIES GOT BIG ASF HELL IT BIGGER THAN MINE.

- Sabo on the other hand well I saw him in the movie Film Gold and Stampede First and also I took a little research about The Revolutionary army BUT WHAT CAUGHT MY EYE WAS KOALA...SHE'S SO CUTE AND GORG MAN...HELL I WOULD FIGH–ehem anyways back to sabo, yeah he's intelligence and strength got me shook cause how can he divide those fingers like that sjrkgks I wanna learn their karate too 😭.

4th Law and Kid

- Well knowing the social media the wano episodes are all over my tiktok fyo page and these two caught my eye since they are always beside luffy in wano.

- Except for Law I knew him on that edit of kamiya hiroshi's voice characters and yes I quickly went to the comment section to know his name.

- I got exposed to knowing him when my friend who stopped watching one piece told me that he often got shipped with luffy and boi after I typed the "LawLu DJ" there I got bombarded with some of their popular comic strips and fanarts that is sometimes questionable and sometimes sweet and fluffy and sweet and some others are traumatizing LMAO SPECIALLY THAT ONE WHERE HE USED HIS DEVIL FRUIT TO CUT HIM AND F HIM 😭. Plus the fact he kinda resemble my boyfriend that's why I found his visual quite appealing...EVEN THE HUMOR AND BRAIN IS ACCURATE LIKE ITS SCARY ASF 😭.

- To kid I kinda find him resemble to bakugo LMAO I DON'T EVEN WATCH MHA YET yet I find him cute and quite funny too.

- Not to mention the manga chapter 1063 and 1079 💀 got me thinking dark humor about then LMAO HELP.

End of Part 1 💗

#one piece #trafalgar law #luffy #roronoa zoro #sanji #eustass kid #portgas d ace #sabo

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dommelody · 2 years

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hey guys its been a while ^^

lately I've became addicted to playing obey me so just decided to write some of my thoughts i mean pure and innocent ones lol just for a change XD and not me totally being a beel simp :") anways enjoy this fluff and wholesome story oh last thing if i find good respond to this one ill maybe make more of those lol enjoy then ^^

☆mc's favoritism☆

♡

It's another morning in the house of lamentation you woke up from your comfy bed opened the windows for some morning air-even tho there's no sun but for some air change-u did some stretching then u wore ur outfit for working out u get it right today ur goin to workout outdoors with beelzebub after he insisted frequently and even gave u some of his cheeseburgers as an exchange for doin morning workout with him although u told him that u will start after breakfast cause no way u ll be able to handle beel's workouts with an empty stomach and he agreed with big smile u went to the dining room

lucifer : "good morning Mc judging from ur outfit i take it that ur going to workout with beel ?"

"yep im starting to notice that i m gaining weight cause of someone lately "

beel with puppy eyes : "Mc did u not like it when i bring u food ? :"("

"NO I FUCKING LOVE IT PLEASE BRING MORE FROM NOW ON"

beel with a big innocent smile : "leave it to me Mc ^_^"

lucifer :" I see ,so because u cant go on a diet due to some indoors food delivery ur only hope is to exercise to lose weight well i dont think uve gained that much weight u look as beautiful as ever*smirk*

"thanks i guess hehe"

mammon : "Hey Mc i found a good place where u can sell stuff and u can gain alot of money there lets go after breakfast "

"oh sorry mammon I'm working out with beel after this"

mammon spaced out for a sec and then blushed : "huh u w-what ?///:

"mammon u perv u got it wrong we r going to exercise outdoors *sighs* even tho u see what im wearing ur still asking ??"

satan:" don't blame him Mc blame that stupid brain of his guess its just full of money thoughts too busy to think properly "

mammon :" WHAT DID YA SAY?IM UR OLDER BROTHER YA KNOW!"

satan:" OLDER BROTHER MY ASS AFTER YOU SOLD MY FREAKING UNDERWEAR TO SOME RANDOM BITCH U CALL URSELF MY OLDER BROTHER !!!STFU STUPID MAMMON"

asmo :"did u literally just go and steal satan's unwashed green underwear mammon u perv~"

satan:" AND HOW TF DID U KNOW ITS GREEN AND UNWASHED BRO THATS GROSS!"

asmo : " iyaa~ dont blame me this time i was PURELY going to wash my underwear then i saw u going out of there then saw it "

satan :"*sighs*AND WHY THE FUCK R U WASHING UR UNDERWEAR AT 3AM,oh wait please don't answer

beel :" Mc try this cake its so delicious :) "

"Thanks beel ^^"

beel :" about our workout i modified urs a little bit because i dont think u can keep up with my pase but for the jogging u have to keep up with me at least 10 rounds around the town *munch* *munch* "

""HUH ?! 10 ROUNDS AROUND THE TOWN BEEL R U TRYING TO KILL ME ?

beel :"Huh ? but ithink its too easy, for me i do about 20 so u can do it but if u reached ur limits don't worry ill carry u home on my back hehe ^^ oh and for the exercises we're going to do all of it together im so excited *excited beel noises *

as beel was eating with eyes sparkling with excitement u couldn't ignore his outstanding appearance beel was used to workout early in the morning so he just made an exception just for u ^^ however his body was aching for some exercising so he did some rope jumping and pushups just minutes before coming to the dining room so he was sweating while wearing a short sleeve black t shirt which were tight around his big chest and muscular arms with sweat dripping from his face reaching his sexy Adam's apple then going straight between his chest just the thought of this big muscular man being excited to workout with u makes u shiver

*simping mc noises (haha caught u bish)

then u try to reach the strawberries which were in front of beel he noticed u staring at strawberries so he picked some

beel :"Mc here , I'll feed u this :)"

"oh thanks beel ^^"

as u ate the strawberries from his hand u licked ur lips and then u felt everyone 's eyes on u as soon as u where about to speak beel licked some of the strawberries close to ur mouth

everyone:" STOP RIGHT THERE !"

as beel realised what he did he turned to a blushing mess cause of his gluttony he just licked it unconsciously

beel :" im sorry Mc i didnt mean to >\\~\\<"

mc simping noises again *touching his cheek :" i dont hate it love~"

then as soon as beel saw the smirk on ur face he was blushing even harder he stood up and hugged u tightly :" lets go Mc cant wait to start our workout /// "

everyone : "AS IF ILL LET U TWO GO ALONE!"

mammom : "I SUDDENLY FEEL LIKE WORKING OUT IM GOING WITH U-"

beel :" but u never workout in the morni-"

mammon:" SHUDDUP!"

"how about going to the witch u sold satans underwear for and give it back to him that will be a good workout right?"

everyone laughed

Lucifer :"*cough* , recently i read that working out will lessen the stress and make u more productive so i think ill-"

"no luci not this time dont pretend that u didnt get a call from diavolo minutes ago to come after u finish breakfast asap"

everyone: "EVEN LUCIFER GOT REJECTED"

beel :" let's go mc :)"

" yea im coming ^^ "

everyone glaring at beel :" UNFAIR "

#obey me #beel x y/n #gn reader #obey me fluff

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lazarettta · 3 years

Text

Misthios

Characters (Reader x Mother Miranda...?) 👀

Rating (T)

Word Count (2.8k)

Warnings (none, first half is has no dialogue, writing while high,)

Once her little warrior, always her little warrior.

I'm sorry if it's hot 🗑💀

The fire was finally the way you wanted it and you could finally fucking rest. You'd been hiking all goddamn day through the rain and snow, and you just wanted a minute to rest and to eat. The sun was starting to set and you still needed to set up your tent, but for the moment you were content to just sit on the log and get warm.

“Who'd ever think a Spartan would be in Rome looking for answers, hm?” it was ironic, how you would've been accused of being a traitor or something like that back then. Ha...back then?

Truthfully you weren't sure anymore where your life really started it's been so long, centuries really if you were being honest. Sometimes even your own secrets were too overwhelming for you to admit, and as the years continued to pass you by it was getting harder and harder for you to hold onto the same principles you once believed in. The wars you've participated in, two of them by choice...and as a favor for the third.

It shouldn't have been possible but it was for you, it was both a blessing and a curse because you were nothing special...you grew up with Spartan blood running through your veins, pushed at a young age to hunt and to protect, it was a common tradition for families then, especially for the oldest or only children. Your didn't ever recall your father, he died in battle before you were born but your mother was there, always. Even if her face was blurry after all of the time that has passed you by—you still remember her teachings and her technique. Your mother was the best hunter in Sparta, proudly.

But after...after her passing, the streets taught you how to be a mercenary at a young age...and then an assassin, not by choice but by necessity because you weren't a good person then, not really, and you still weren't now...but you still had the will do what was right, and so you did.

And maybe that is why the Gods did not let you die in the battlefield when you'd been caught off guard, for what is no longer relevant as it is now long gone, but the scar left through your heart would forever stain you inside and out by some random Greek bastard. You don't remember much of the dying part as much as you remembered how badly it hurt and how livid you were watching him stand over you with his bloody sword raised to the heavens. But just like your pain, that emotion was ebbed away as you laid there dying.

And die you did. And your body laid there for who knows how long but when you woke up, oh you sprung up ready to fight but there wasn't a fight left to be had...the war was over...but you didn't know that until you woke up the second time. Not realizing that your body was next to be burned in the ditch as the battlefield was being cleared of all the corpses from both sides. A gruesome chore performed by the prisoners taken by Sparta.

You had no idea why the Gods healed you and brought you back from the dead, you didn't deserve a second chance (at the time you didn't realize that it was a power). You were blessed by the Gods and that's all that it was, people looked at you with both awe and envy. Some gave all of their iron and dearest family possessions as a gift to the Gods in hopes that their wishes were granted. They hated you and you did not care. You were unstoppable, everyone wanted your attention and your skills—it made you arrogant and stupid for years. And when you caught a pretty nasty gash across your back from a werewolf that ambushed you and your horse, your leathers had been torn and bloody by the time you speared your way through four of those beasts. But while there was blood, there was no wound...the only evidence were the scars it left behind.

Snap!

You turned your head slightly, a few strands of your hair falling in front of your ever sharp (y/e/c) eyes. You stayed perfectly still, eyes scanning the forest surrounding you but there was nothing after several moments. Just as well...with a loud sigh, you finally got up to put up your tent for the night and probably for the next few nights too. You slipped your hunting knife back into your boot but kept it unhooked just in case.

You lived in a time where guns existed but you were always better with a blade. You may not be an active misthios now (mercenary in today's world) but old habits were hard to kick. You were too old and too wise now, even if you didn't look a day over twenty-eight.

The next morning...

You woke with a start your grip around your obsidian hunting knife so tight your knuckles your skin strained against bone. You didn't have a dream but something woke you up, and it wasn't those damn birds chirping literally above your tint. With the help of the morning sun you could even see the spot where one of them pooped. Great. You laid there for a few more minutes, finally relaxed enough to move. You checked your surroundings again, walking around your camp but that feeling of unease didn't go away but it wasn't as strong.

Today was clearer than it was the day before though you still had to deal with the snow and the cold, not that either really bothered you too much. Leaving your camp behind, marking the trees so that you had a way to find your way back through these unfamiliar woods, you set off to find breakfast. You came to an edge, a cliff's peak and you went to stand on the edge of it—to maybe see the rest of the mountain you were exploring but something caught your immediate attention.

When was the last time you ever saw a castle? Not...not those tourist marks they have all over Europe but a castle. The place was eerie but most castles always felt that way to you...but this was different? It was as if the castle was looking right back at you, mocking you. From your vantage point you could make out the edges of a lake through the thick trees, you couldn't see it very well but you could tell it wasn't small nor was it man-made.

It was a pleasant surprise to discover this as you assumed that your trip would mostly be you exploring this cold ass mountain without a proper guide but you didn't need anyone to know why you were really up here, your reasons concerned no one but yourself. That and you knew you'd end up leading your guide. You were better off alone. Or at least that's what you kept telling yourself that but those words stopped being comforting a very long time ago. Not like fate was giving you much of a fucking choice though.

Your stomach growled, reminding you of your hunt...you glanced down at the village below the castle curiously before turning away from the ledge, the heavy aura of the castle still on your back.

Fat and full, that's exactly how you'd describe yourself at the moment. There were more predators in the area than there were prey it seemed but the rabbit you caught seemed plentiful enough. With winter kicking in, the most worrisome predator in the woods would be hibernating leaving nothing but the wolves and maybe a mountain lion for you to deal with if you're lucky. You hefted your smaller backpack onto your back and left your camp, deciding to check out the village to see if you could learn more about the castle.

You were both excited and curious, you'd spent a majority of your modern life exploring the wonders of the Earth and using the currency you've collected throughout your lifetimes to fund whatever myth caught your eye. In other words, you were bored but the thought of war and fighting no longer made your blood sing or your heart race. You've done so much of that already, and lost so much because of it.

“Get back! Get back! Agh—GET THE FUCK BACK!”

Your legs stopped moving immediately and your gloved hand was already wrapped around the hilt of your hunting knife, ears trained. You heard growling and barking not too far from where you stood, maybe two or three hundred feet to your right just through those bushes and that fallen tree. It sounded as if someone was having a bit of trouble with a pack of wolves. Which struck you as odd, you were still pretty high up on the mountains and you hadn't seen anyone else up here in a week, so it couldn't have been a local...could it?

The growling grew more intense and there were sounds of a scuffle and grunts but the man still sounded alive.

And it wasn't your problem. Your days of coming to the rescue were over. You allowed your hand to fall from your knife. You got maybe seven steps away before the man spotted you, he caught a glimpse of your fur lined hood and started screaming for you to help him just as one of the wolves snapped the branch he was holding in half, forcing his back against a tree. His time was counting down now.

He was yelling so loud, you were sure even the villagers could hear him now. There was no way you could walk away now.

“Fucking hell.” with a heavy sigh, you dropped your backpack and stalked in the direction of the soon to be crime scene. You didn't feel the need to mask your presence, you wanted the wolves to know that you were there and that ultimately saved that man's life. The wolves were honed in on you the moment you stepped through the bush but three shots echoed through the small clearing before any of them could pounce in your direction. The echoes faded away quickly, and you sighed again watching the white snow stain red beneath the furry corpses.

The only other sound heard was the man's heavy breathing as he leaned against a tree. You looked down at your gun before putting it back in it's holster on your lower back, you may prefer blades but it was always better to have something and not need it, than to need it and not have it.

“Thank...thank you,”

You looked at the man with furrowed brows...just by looking at him, you knew that he wasn't a native but the moment he opened his mouth only confirmed it. He was American...you spotted all of his gear nearby, torn to shreds and you scoffed.

“I don't think camping is for you.”

“I don't think so either,” He tried for a smile but it was only a grimace, the blonde man pushed himself from the tree and approached you, carefully stepping around the wolves bodies, “I'm uh a bit lost, I guess.”

“And I'm leaving.”

“Wait!” he rushed around you, stopping you and you could've gone through the man if you wanted to...you were taller than him by an inch or two, and you definitely had more mass than he probably knew what to do with, “Listen, I'm obviously not from here, but I'm trying to find my daughter okay, she's—”

“I'm not from around here,” you held your hand to make him stop while simultaneously telling yourself that you're not about to get involved in someone else's mess and derail your own mission, “I'm sorry about your kid, but I can't help you.”

He frowned at you obviously not happy with your answer but he was quickly reaching into his pocket and any normal person, especially someone who is armed, would've taken a step back but you weren't some ordinary person. You simply raised an eyebrow, because you knew that he wasn't going to attack you even though he was probably fully capable of doing so. You assumed that he was about to dig out a baby picture or something but it was just a sheet of paper with writing on it. You took it before he could shove the damn thing in your face and you looked down at it carefully, keeping your face neutral.

“I can't read whatever language that is.”

You glared up at him from beneath your lashes, “And you think that I can?”

“Can you?” he shot back, and you rolled your eyes...your attention back to the paper before shoving it back in his hands, “Well?”

You nearly scowled at his impatience, “It's a mix of Romanian, Serbian and Tatar. Whoever sent that clearly doesn't want anyone else to know what's on it.”

“So you can read it then?”

“Bits and pieces,” You said with a shrug, “I'm not expert but someone named Beneviento is demanding a shorter route for wine delivery from that giant castle.”

He stared at you then down to the paper, which was full from top to bottom, then back to you, “What...that's all? Are you sure?? No, that can't be all...there has to be something about my daughter here! Here, please, just try again slower—”

“That's all I could read.” you shouldered past him, throwing your hood back up and ignoring his calls after you. Your backpack was exactly where you dropped it, you shook off the snow and threw it back on your back not caring about the cool wetness on your back now—you just wanted to get away from this area as quickly as possible. You should've used your knife as those gunshots gave away your position.

“Amateur hour everyone,” you grumbled under your breath...you veered off the path slightly, just in case he tried to follow you (wouldn't be the first time someone tried to force you to help them).

You'd maybe walked for a mile or two down the mountain before you noticed the hairs on the back of your neck standing, you chanced a casual glance over your shoulder but there was no one there, no man nor animal. Licking your dry lips you turned back around but as you were doing so, you caught something in your peripheral. A dark figure, twenty feet away and that's when you noticed how fucking quiet everything was around you...you forced yourself to keep walking even as a feeling of dread began crawling up your back, like two sharp fingers walking along the ridges of your spine.

Pushing the hood from your head, you whirled around with your knife drawn at your side gripping it with the intentions to kill but there was nothing there except two large obsidian feathers fluttering gently down onto the snow at your boots. Feathers?

Cool breath touched the base of your neck when you heard soft chuckling directly behind you. You turned around sharply, easily flipping your knife around but the mass of darkness in front of you disoriented you for a split second and that was all this creature needed. Before you could plunge your knife into it's feathery belly, a pale hand shot out and caught your wrist in a bruising grip as another hand curled itself around your throat, sharp nails oh so slightly pricking your skin.

You were about to kick away when the creature leaned forward, and it's face came from beneath the hood...only it wasn't an it, it was a she, though her entire face was hidden by the gold headgear you could see her lips and...and her eyes.

A pair of eyes you'd never forget in any of your lifetimes. It felt like a millennia ago when those eyes alone had you on your knees covered in fresh warm blood and exhausted from tearing through small armies.

Despite yourself, you were trembling in her ironclad grip, your hand that wasn't still trapped fruitlessly came up to wrap around her wrist as if that was going to help you. You both knew that it wouldn't. She brought you closer until your feet were no longer on the ground and you could feel the tip of your blade pressing against something...no, her...and your nose was nearly touching her helmet.

“ο μικρός μου πολεμιστής...” (my little warrior...) her cool breath washed over your face, her eyes still boring down into yours so intensely you swore you felt the heat, even as her hand tightened around your throat making you choke, but you were fighting against her... “επιτέλους ήρθες σπίτι μου...” her chuckle fell on deaf ears. (you've finally come home to me...)

You were supposed to run into Alcina first 😭, but Miranda works too...(save the best for last obvi) I don't know I am playing Odyssey while waiting for this game to drop and I went The Old Guard route too so then I just ended up writing some shit, and I wanted to try something that's not so maiden-esque lol so I hope it's enjoyable at least...I honestly might make this a WIP...

#resident evil 8 #mother miranda x reader #mother miranda #resident evil #resident evil village #lady alcina #alcina dimitrescu #alcina x reader #dis tew much #assassins creed odyssey #lady dimitrescu #i'm a big simp for these bishes

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taeyamayang · 3 years

Note

Congrats on 200 pea! my name is Yume and i'd like to get matched with a boy pls :)

I do a lot of writing and drawing, playing visual novels, and reading manga/watching anime!

I love listening to music since its very distracting from the loud noises (im sensitive to loud noises so music helps me out a lot + to calm down) hanging out with my friends or just going out to places with somsone and watching horror movies.

I dislike being in crowds and loud noises and loud loud people (but i can tolerate depending who) i also hate insects, i have a big fear of them but i dont hate them, my brain and heart just go bersek when i see one :')

I'm an INTJ, very shy at firsy but once you get to know me there's no turning back from my chaotic nature. I love making people laugh even if its in my own expence (did i word that right? lol my first language isin't english) I tend to be impulsive and talk without thinking and be blunt, i dont tend to sugar coat things and come off as brutal or rude but also kind of funny according to my best friend (even if i dont mean to) normally to others i talk alot and be loud but at the same time im an introvert and its all a facade :''))) so when i just get tired or zone out people around to feel bad for me since they think im sad (apperantly i have a both a sad restibg face an a resting bish face) but im not sad im just chilling in my imagination and simping for 2D people :'b

(I hope i didn't overshare, thank you!♡)

i am pairing you withㅡYamaguchi Tadashi

↬ who doesn't love this gumball like srsly? he's such an angel, a sweet human who had been hurt before yet still managed to keep a tender heart. he's an introvert (don't argue with me on this) i think he fits well with your intolerance with loud noises. im guessing he's not a people pleaser too so when you say something brutally honest to him i think he's the type to smile at you and accept your constructive criticism. he's also sensitive of other's feelings (s3 with tsukki) so PLEASE he's literally a walking fresh breath of air in this vile universe. and i think you'll fall inlove (if you aren't yet) with how soft his voice is plus his giggle?? have you heard of his giggle if you havent appreciated that much yet GO SEARCH FOR IT ON YOUTUBE,, okay i should prolly calm down. last thing, your names kinda rhyme?? yume and yams?? yumeyams?? it's coincidental i promise you. that's all.

your head nods thanks to the man working behind the counter as he hands you the paper bag filled with the books you bought. you grip onto the cotton strap holding the bag as your other hand steadies your phone as you type in your message using one hand.

"i'm done with the bookstore. where are you?" you press on the send button and wait for your friend's reply as you stand idly outside of the store.

"long line, sorry! ill pick you up there since the person i want you to meet will be there in a few!" your eyes narrow at the text your friend sent you. meeting with someone is not part of the plan.

you sigh loudly before pulling your earphones from the pocket of your bottoms. you navigate through the applications installed in your phone. you click on the familiar green app thereafter pressing play on your favorite tune. you let the rhythm carry your thoughts into your own bubble as you hum with the melody.

however, you were quickly snatched away from your paradise when you feel someone tug on the hem of your shirt.

"mommy!" your eyes widen when a toddler refers you to someone you're not. you remove one earphone from your ear to look at the kid once more, taking in the whole situation unraveling before your eyes. your orbs catch on shoes standing near the kid. you look up to see a young man about your age with a worried look on his face. tiny spots of darker specks akin to stars in the midnight sky outline the upper part of his face. your pupils meet and the boy's eyelids stretches out.

"she lost her parents but she won't come with me unless you go with us. she kept insisting you should come." his voice is muted yet loud enough for you to hear. the kid cries louder.

"hey, where did you last see your parents?" you crunch down, folding your knees as you level your gaze with the kid. the boy keeps his eyes on you as you attempt to cease the child's tantrum.

"t-the event." she sniffs as she wipes the tears on his cheeks using her entire forearm. you figured the kid is referring to the family event held in the main building of the mall.

"okay, we'll go find your parents." she sniffs one more time before nodding at you. your soothing voice seem to work on the kid. she takes your hand using her small ones while her other hand latches onto the hands of the boy with troubled face. you bring your eyes to the latter.

"i guess we're going together." you say, earning a tight smile from the boy.

the whole walk to the main building of the mall is in silence. you assumed he isn't much of a big talker and you yourself aren't great at small talks. so, you let the silence fill the whole way to the event, glancing at him from time to time to check on his features. you have been around this area your whole life but you haven't seen him before. the three of you reach the main building and immediately a staff from the event approaches the three of you.

"get your family signed up to get vouchers limited only to those who joined the event!" the woman enthusiastically shows you a fliers with products at discount.

"we're not-" the boy cuts you off,

"maybe some other time, thank you." he kindly refuses the woman's offer, catching you off guard with his choice of words. he made it seem like the three of you are a legit family.

"i don't like making complicated explanations. by simply saying that, it saves time." he turns his head to you.

"mommy!" the kid untangles her hands from yours as she rushes to a woman in her late thirties. she welcomes the kid with her arms in the air ready to collide with her child's embrace. once the reunion is over, the woman nears the two of you. she thanks you both genuinely, worry and gratefulness both etched on her face.

"thank you so much for your kind efforts. you two make a great couple." she shakes each of your hands but her last statement made you raise an eyebrow.

"we, uh," the boy tries to counter her assumption but it's your turn to cut him off.

"it was nothing." you smile at the mother before turning your head to the boy and shooting him a knowing look. he tears his eyes away from your as his cheeks slowly bathes in red. the woman and the child leave both of you behind. you shift your orbs back to meet with his'.

"you said you didn't like explaining complex things to strangers?" you cock your head to the side, teasing him. he scratched the back of his head as he offers you a bashful smile.

"yume!" surprisingly, your friend calls you from a distance, shopping bags clinging onto her forearms. her eyes widen when she takes in the boy next to you. "yams? is that you tadashi? i meant to introduce the two of you to each other but i think I'm late to the party."

in unison, both of you turn your heads to the side. his eyes holding yours and your lips pulling up into a smile; astounded by the unexpected serendipity.

"i guess we're meant to meet afterall." yamaguchi says as his smile grows wider.

a/n: yams is so cute i want to cuddle him,, anyway thanks for joining the event!

#haikyuu #haikyuu!!#hq headcanons #hq oneshots #hq drabbles #hq yamaguchi #yamaguchi headcanons #haikyuu yamaguchi #yamaguchi tadashi #yamaguchi x reader #yamaguchi imagine #pea.events #pea.asks #pea.writes

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