#i’m not ashamed or anything it’s just. i’ve found a nice space for myself

[zunniva]

Return of the Freak

I grew up thinking that whatever would happen to me I would never do what my dad did. I would never fall head over heals for someone and just give myself  to them without hesitation. Well... I did good on this until this year, my 21st year on this rock in space.

I had heard my dad speak of his old friend Eddie for as long as I could remember. Telling me about the time they fought in, what they called, the upside down. How they thought for a long time that Eddie died there, killed by... demobats? I used to pet my dads head and tell him that the weed they smoked back then must have been strong AS FUCK...he just smiled at  me and said

“Sweetie I WISH it would have been just some drug induced nightmare...” then he'd fall silent again. Anyway, he talks a lot about how they all thought Eddie died there. But then apparently they went back to try and find his corpse and bring it back to sweet old Wayne, Eddies uncle and one of my favorite people ever.  Well...they found that Eddie had survived, badly hurt, but alive. “Scarred for life” dad said “just like the rest of us, we were just kids Hailey. I was 19 and Eddie was 20 and we were the oldest in group”

I grew up with these stories. Dads friend Dustin always cries when dad mentions Eddie. He was with him when he was attacked and he was the one having to leave him for dead. He was also the one to make the rest of them go back to find Eddies body. He's the sweetest guy but I don't get how he's also in on this idea of some alternate dimension, monsters, mind flaying, some dude called Vecna controlling it all...yeah and a lot of other creepy stuff. You hear the way it sounds? Right? Not just me?

The thing though is that ALL the others from back then tell the same kind of stories. But how come none of this is to be found in our city's past then? Not one word about any paranormal activities or a lab in Hawkins meddling in turning “gifted” children into some kind of spies and weapons. Dad swears by it, he's even introduced me to one of his friends he says is one of these kids. Jane, or Eleven as she was called back then in the 80's. Nice enough woman, but I don't see anything special about her.

All of this happened back in 1986 the year before I was born, they lost Eddie just before graduation that year. They found him again just before Christmas, that's when Dustin had pestered the rest of them to get Eddies body so that Wayne could get closure, and to try and clear Eddies name. Apparently some kids were killed and they thought Eddie did it for some reason. All of this is very unclear to me. Eddie spent the following 3 months in the hospital. My dad and Dustin visited him almost daily. Dad and him grew very close then. They talk at least once a week, so far my contact with Eddie has been

“Hello”

“Yeah hey Hailey, Steve in?”

“Hey Eddie, yeah I'll get him” or “No, but I'll have him call you back”

He has a deep melodic voice which I like very much but I have never met him personally. After he was discharged from the hospital he packed his stuff and left Hawkins never to come back to this day. Dad calls him a nomad, he never stays more than a few months anywhere apparently. Making a living as a mechanic or guitarist. Whatever he can find, he also calls in on Wayne twice a week, Wednesdays and Sundays. But that's it, the only people he has contact with here is dad and his uncle, not even Dustin hears from him.

I've seen pictures of him from high school, nice looking guy. Big beautiful smile and mischievous eyes. Long hair and ripped jeans always in a leather jacket and his Hellfire club shirt. He's always been some kind of ideal man in my thoughts. I thought that if I can find a guy like him I'll settle down and be happy. I'm ashamed to say I had many wet dreams about the guy in my dads yearbook...

I mentioned a Hellfire shirt, when the club thought he died they framed his shirt as and homage, Dustin still has it. When he was found alive they talked about bringing Hellfire back again but when Eddie left town the club died in his memory, Dustin said it would never have been Hellfire again without Eddie. I find this sad, I can hear that to this day Dustin misses that club. They played Dungeons and Dragons together and they were all like his brothers he says. When he gets really sad about it I always hug him and say I can learn to play and make a new Hellfire club with him. He always hugs me back and tells my dad he got the greatest daughter ever and that Eddie would love me.

My dad was once considered the king of Hawkins High, they called him Steve “the hair” Harrington. I laugh when I hear people still call him this. His hair lives in infamy. I mean he still has great hair, and for a guy that just turned 41 he's pretty alright looking. Or as my friends say “He's such a total dilf!” I don't think I have now nor have ever had a friend that hasn't wanted to do my dad, which is very disturbing to me. But ok he's not THAT old and I mean he works out and he doesn't look like he's past the big 40.

That October after “the incident” he met my mom and well one thing led to another and hey there I was... He was 20 when I was born in July of 87. Dad and mom never made it as a couple, I still see my mom but she moved to New York when I was 14 and I had to chose. I wanted to stay with my dad and my friends here in Hawkins. I visit her about twice a year and we talk all the time. Dad and his old high school girlfriend Nancy got back together a few years back and he's as happy as can be with her. I see them together and I want that, but I guess I just haven't found the one for me? And that is not from a lack of trying so to speak. I've dated and I've had boyfriends, I like sex but somethings always been missing, I don't get like horny and wet by someone's touches. I mean sex is good and all, but I think there's more to it, there has to be. I can't seem to find that “I want to be with you forever, I can't imagine life without you, take me now and keep me forever” feeling. Dad has this idea that whatever happened in the Upside down altered his DNA so I was born screwed up, he's sweet but that's just a bit far fetched even for him and his stories. In the back of my head there's always been the idea of finding someone like Eddie, and since there's only one of him maybe I'm destined to be alone?

So when I turned 19 I kind of gave up, and I've been single since then. It's been two years and honestly I don't mind, my friends are worried that I might dry up and become some crazy cat lady spinster by 25. I mean seriously? I have time to find someone... God I'm only 21! When they bother me too much about it I just say

“Hell yeah, I'm going to move in to uncle Wayne's trailer when he's too old to live there and become a loner” then they shut up, I think they believe me. I would NEVER kick Wayne out, and I never want him to become too old to be there. But the truth is he is getting old, he's not as healthy as he once was and dad is worried about him and so am I. He got a cancer diagnosis 6 months ago and he's gone down hill ever since. I overheard dad talking to Eddie the other night.

“Yeah I know Ed, but c'mon the man's been there for you forever! You kinda owe it to him to come now that the doctor's not giving him long to live. I mean I would love to see you and so would everyone else. It's been over 20 years Ed...”

I heard  Eddies voice on the other end, then my dads again

“Really Ed? That's great I'll pick you up. Just let me know when. Awesome man can't wait to see you... what? Yeah, no I won't tell them. We can surprise them”

I smile to myself, dad is so excited. Seems the famous Eddie Munson is returning to Hawkins, Indiana for the first time in 21 years. He was turning 21 when he up and left so he's 42 now. I know everyone will be equally happy to see him. Might even get to see Jonathan and Will, I think they'll wanna meet Eddie too. They are the only ones besides Eddie that moved away after they graduated school, but they come back and see us all and their mom Joyce a couple of times a year. I like them both very much. I remember when dad and Nancy got back together they thought that Jonathan might think it was weird, seeing as him and Nancy were a couple for quite some time. But he was SO happy for them, he's married and has the cutest twins ever! Barb and Chrissy, named after the two girls who were killed back then. One of which Eddie was blamed for, but they soon realized he was innocent but by then it was too late.

Two weeks go by and I go to see Wayne almost daily, he's gotten worse and this Sunday as I drive over to the trailer park he's always lived at and I think to myself that it's weird Eddie never showed up. I haven't heard dad say he was picking him up, I know it was supposed to be a secret Eddie coming to town but I told dad I overheard in case he needed me to cover for him when picking Eddie up. But I heard nothing more about it. I park outside Wayne's home and I get my key out, he gave it to me when I had my teen angst years and sometimes needed to escape dad. I never knock I just enter, he told me to do that. Usually he's on the couch in front of the TV so I see him straight away when opening the door. Not today though, I open and I let out a happy

“Hey Wayne, how you doin' today sweetie” but he's not there. Instead I freeze in my tracks. In the kitchen I see THE sexiest backside on a man I have ever seen. I feel my entire body catch fire and I hear myself let out a short but very loud “oh wow” I can't stop staring. Like, for real, I. CAN. NOT. TURN. AWAY!

The guy stands with his back towards me when I hear him say “It's rude to stare like that without introducing one self! You always enter without knocking? How did you get in by the way the door was locked?” I instantly recognize that voice and I feel my knees go weak, fuck no! He turns to face me

“Oh...ehmmm. Hi Eddie... I'm Hailey, Steve's daughter. Wayne gave me a key many years ago, I ehh...I never knock. I'm so sorry but I didn't know you had arrived, dad didn't say” I can feel myself blush. What the hell?

“You're... Hailey?” He eyes me up and down and a small smile plays in the corner of his mouth “Yeah, Steve picked me up last night” he explains

“Oh...wait a minute. He had to go in to work last night, said there was some delayed deliveries he had to sign for” I say with a smile

“That'd be me... I was a delayed delivery. Plane got in later than expected” he's standing by the counter leaning towards it just looking at me. I feel flustered, what the actual hell was this?

“Oh, ok then I see. Ehmmm... how's Wayne today? “ I ask

“He's sleeping, we stayed up late. He actually cried when he saw me coming through the door. Made me feel awful staying away this long.” he says and looks back towards the closed door of the bedroom.

“He always speaks of you Eddie, he's very proud of you and he loves you so much. Your calls were the first thing we had to go through on my visits” I say and smile.

“Really? You don't say, who'd thought. You visited him often then I take it?” Eddie's gaze is intense and I have to look away

“Yeah, almost every day. He never mentioned that? He's my favorite person ever” I say and the feelings flow through me making me smile one of the smiles my dad says can heal the world. I can hear a small gasp exiting Eddie and his gaze is even more fixed on me.

“He talked a lot about Hal coming over, and that she was the best. Didn't put two and two together that that was you” he gives me a beaming smile and I feel like passing out. Jesus fucking CHRIST now I see what my friends mean when they say they wanna jump someone's bones because they're so hot! I don't know where to look, I feel ashamed for thinking this about a man twice my age and who's a friend of dad's. In the corner of my eye I can see Eddie tilting his head as he studies me, a smirk on his lips. I hear him chuckle softly and then he turns away from me and goes in to the kitchen.

“You want some coffee or tea or something?” he asks looking at me

“Ehm, coffee please. If you're having some, no need to make it just for me” I say and when he nods and turns to get water I can really look at him. He hasn't changed much from the pictures my dad has at home, just a bit scruffier and more mature. Same build, that lean but seemingly strong body. Tattoos cover his arms and what I can see of his chest. I never knew arms and hands could be sexual but god damn! I think I unlocked a kink as my friend Macy would say. I can not take my eyes off his muscles moving under his skin when he makes the coffee. I feel a throbbing down under, well... apparently I CAN get horny for someone. That's a first... I can feel that my panties are getting soaked, what the hell am I to do? Can't sit on the couch now... I will fucking stain it I'm wearing a skirt for fucks sake. I look around feeling like I might panic. I can sit on the floor...no that'll look strange. I see the blanket Wayne keeps on the sofa for when he's to tired to go to the bedroom. I can sit on that, it's not as sensitive to...wet stains as the fabric of the couch. I go and I fold it and sit down, feeling my juices actually soaking down in to the blanket...fuck. Eddie finishes the coffee and comes over, set the mug down in front of me.

“Take it black or you want something in it?” he asks

“Some creamer if Wayne has any otherwise black is ok.” he goes to the kitchen and looks in the fridge.

“There's milk...” he says “can't find any creamer”

“Milk works too, thank you” damn I'm polite all of a sudden. Eddie returns with milk, I take it and pour some in my coffee. He then sits down and looks at me with those incredibly brown eyes.

“So Hailey, this is the face of the voice on the phone. Nice to finally meet you” he holds his mug up as a cheers sign

“And you're the voice on the other end always looking for dad, nice to finally meet you as well Eddie. I've heard a lot about you.” I cheer him back with my mug.

“Well...most of it is probably lies I would say” he fakes an innocent look

“Well if you say so, but seriously though you're very missed around here”

Eddie looks at me, his face does this small grimace and he looks sad. Then he shakes his head as if to get rid of something bad and then he smiles again.

“Well Hawkins is small... must be boring here without the town freak to keep them occupied. I have no idea why'd they miss an old fart like me”

“Hey you're not that old. C'mon as dad says you're in the prime of your life here” I giggle at him and he looks at me with that intense stare again making me choke on my coffee. I then flinch from having to cough, which then leads to me spilling coffee down my top... which then of course makes me let out a squeal and turning my top wet and plastered to my boobs. Yeah...ok... I can die now right?

“Damn! You alright there?” I can hear the underlying laughter in Eddies voice “can I get you a towel or some napkins or some....thing” the voice changes and I look up at him he's staring at my chest.

I go blood red and get up

“No...I think I'll just...you know leave before I do something worse and, I don't know set fire to this place. I'll see you around Eddie. Thank you for the coffee tell Wayne I stopped by. Bye!” I fly out the door and out on to the stairs, I lean on the door for a minute, out of breath and panting. What was that tone in his voice and that look? Did he... like what he saw? I feel a flutter in my stomach at the thought of Eddie Munson liking the sight of my coffee soaked boobs. I shake my head... No, that wasn't it, he must have just been amazed by my clumsiness. Yep, that's a far more logical explanation I tell myself as I go to my car and head home.

When I get home I hear dads voice the instant I close the front door. Since I've just graduated college and haven't found a secure job yet I moved back in with dad and Nancy for a while. Saves me some money and they get some help with the bills.

“Heard you met Eddie! Sorry I didn't tell you when I called from work. But Dustin was next to me so I had to be stealth” he chuckles

“No problem, but you could have told me before I left today, he damn near scared the living crap out of me when I went in with my key seeing him in the kitchen. I thought someone broke in” I tell him

“Sorry love, but he seemed to like you. Said you were very polite and friendly”

“Well... I tried” I say and feel myself blushing. Lucky he's in the kitchen and I'm in the hallway.

“I spilled coffee all over myself, probably looked like a moron...need to shower and change”

I hear a roaring laugh “Yeah he told me, said you looked like you were panicking there for a moment, but he didn't seem to think you looked like a moron. He was worried you burnt yourself?”

“Yeah, no I'm ok... had a lot of milk in the coffee it wasn't that hot... well, I'll be down soon” I rush up to my room and remove my clothes throwing them in my hamper and hitting the shower. I think about the events of this day and I realize I might have the hots for a man 21 years older than me... I need to talk to someone about this, definitely not dad. I don't think Nancy is it either... Mike or Jane? Maybe Max... Nah... hey I got it ROBIN! She doesn't judge anyone about anything ever, being the first girl to come out as gay in Hawkins in the late 80's she's been through hell, she's both mine and dads best friend.

Yeah I need to call Robin after dinner, before this eats me up from the inside. I get in the shower and let the hot water drench me and I attempt to clear my mind. But no, of course not, my mind goes straight to Eddies arms and hands. The water hits my pussy and I let out a moan, fucking hell. My knees turn to spaghetti as I feel the tension building up. I can't stop, it feels too good. I change the setting on the shower head to a jet stream and I just go to town thinking about Eddie. This is sure as hell not hurting anyone. The sweet feeling when the release comes and I slide down the wall as my knees give in when the orgasm hits is amazing. I've come before, of course I have by the help of others and by my own hand but this...this was something else. I sit there panting for a bit, then I feel myself blushing. How the hell am I going to look this man in the eye again after this? He's not going to be able to see what happened here but I will know it and  I will probably find a way to be soooo obvious. I sigh and I step out of the shower, and wrap myself in a towel and go back in to my bedroom and sit down on the bed. The phone rings and I pick up

“Hello?”

“Hello sweetheart”

“Oh Wayne, how are you sweetie?”

“Not gonna lie love, I'm spent. Think I might give up soon, the hurtin's begun. The one the doc's talked about. Sorry I missed your visit though, Eddie told me you stopped by” he sounds uncomfortable and out of breath

“Awww Wayne, please don't say that I'm going to cry” I say and feel myself tearing up “yes I met Eddie, he seems as nice as you've always said” I tell him

“Ah shush now, no crying over this old bag 'o bones. You'll be fine without me, you're going to rule the world love. Yeah Eddie liked you, said you're a hell of a lot prettier than your old dad. Couldn't agree more” he laughs but that only makes him cough, the cancer had spread to his lungs now.

“That's nice of him” I say and feel those butterflies again. He thinks I'm pretty, this makes me smile. “But Wayne, I can hear this is taking a lot out of you, you go rest now and I'll be over in the morning. Ok?” I say

“Sure thing sweetheart. Just wanted to hear your voice y'know. Bye now and have a good night”

“Bye Wayne you too, and tell Eddie I say good night as well” I say and I hear him convey my message

“He says likewise and wishes you sweet dreams” Wayne hangs up and I'm stuck sitting on the edge of my bed, phone in hand thinking “Sweet dreams” who wishes someone they just med sweet dreams? Did he...suspect something? Oh god I hope not, I feel myself blushing once again. I get dressed, go down and have dinner with dad and Nancy. We talk about dad wanting to invite the “old gang” this weekend, Nancy seems surprised.

“Well we're closing in on someone's 40th aren't we... and seeing as we're going to go out of town I thought...I'd you know surprise you” he smiles, I know why he really wants to do this I also know that the biggest surprise isn't Nancy's birthday party. It's Eddie's return. Nancy seems happy about this and says she'll give Mike and Jane a call and Jonathan if dad can call Max, Dustin and Lucas. She goes in to planning mode, she loves hosting parties. Dad and I look at each other and smile. I go up to give Robin a call, I say that I'll talk to her about the party so that I've helped as well. They laugh and say that they're thankful I'll take on the difficult one. I get to my room and I crawl up into the bed and dial Robins number.

“Y'ello?”

“Hey Rob, it's me”

“Hey me, how's everything?” I hear her smile

“Pretty good, say can I come over just for a quick chat?”

“Sure, must be something important...or bad if you can't talk on the phone. I'm not too busy so you just come on over sweetie” well she's not wrong there...and I don't want to risk dad overhearing.

We hang up and I head down stairs again.

“Hey, I'm just going to go over to Robin's real quick. She was a bit busy but I could come over if I needed to talk she just couldn't be on the phone.” I call in to the living room.

“Sure honey, say hey from us. Remember to tell her about Saturday at 6” dad calls back

“Ok, will do! Good night if you're asleep when I come back”

“Night sweetie” they call back to me in chorus.

I drive the short trip to Robin's apartment building. I knock on the door and let myself in. She's elbow deep in some kind of dough?

“Ehmmm... what'ya doin' there Rob?” I ask and giggle

“Saw this amazing thing on the net on sourdough bread, thought I'd give it a try” Robin is always trying new hobbies with a passion...for about a day then she moves on. I'm thinking she'll be over this craze by the time the bread is out of the oven.

“Oook...well good luck with that” I say and laugh as I walk into the kitchen and help myself to a coke from the fridge. I sit down at the counter and watch her “sooo... I need to talk to someone who's VERY non judgmental...” just fucking grab the bull by the balls.

“That'll be me love! What's up?” she says dough up to her elbows

“I sorta...kinda...I think I might have you know THOSE kind of feelings for a man...” I say and  watch her closely

“WHAT!? Noooo way! Oh My God! Not that I get that whole thing with men but that's just awesome. Told you you weren't a freak! So spill!” she gets so excited she splatters dough all over the walls, the counter...me

“Thanks Rob” I say and pick some dough off my face grinning at her “I don't know of there's really anything to spill right now. I just met this guy and well... he just started something inside of me. Like that sweet horny feeling” I know I can say stuff like this to her without it being weird.

“Oh my... oh sorry...wait I need to clean this up. You need my full attention that much is for sure! Hold on, or better yet help me and we'll hit the couch after” of course... the times I've come over just to end up a cleaning lady. I laugh at her and get to scraping dough of the kitchen surfaces. Takes about 15 minutes and by the time were done so is Robins fascination with sourdough.

We sit down on opposite ends of the couch and she glares at me

“So...man...horny...go on” she says

“Well yeah, you know I've always thought I couldn't feel like that. Like there might be something wrong with me. Well...there isn't apparently. I just hadn't met anyone that did it for me. Or as Macy says I hadn't unlocked any kinks” Robin is nodding along as I speak “well so... last night I went to see Wayne as I always do and then” I think to myself if I'm to keep dads big surprise I have to rewrite this a bit “he was asleep so I went outside to head home. This guy, he must be new there came out from one of the other trailers and we started talking. And sweet baby Jesus Robin... I had to get myself off when I got home... I realized I have a thing for arms and hands...” I look at her, she looks shook. Eyes wide, jaw dropped.

“It was THAT intense? Wow! But...ok you sounded like there was an issue with this... so far I see no issue sweetie?” she pets my knee

“Weeeeell... thing is he's a bit older than me... like your age older”

There is silence... then

“Oh...well I see the issue now. Also why you came to me and not Steve...yeah...hmmm... I'd say, see if you can accidentally bump in to him again and talk some more. Maybe he isn't as nice as he seems after a while. Remember I told you about Max's brother Billy... make sure he's not one of those...” she says and shakes her head. Yeah I remember the stories about Billy. Hot as fuck, mean as fuck too.

“Yeah that might be a good idea, I'm going over there tomorrow mid day. Maybe he's not as fine in the daylight” I laugh and Robin snorts

“That's one way to put it! Nah but you know age is just a number and us late 60's kids aren't that old yet! We got a lot of juice left in us” she says and winks at me

“Well put Rob, well put. Speaking of late 60's kids. Dad and Nancy are having a party for the old gang on Saturday at 6. You NEED to be there, for me if nothing else” I say and give her my sweetest face

“A party...with the old peeps...” she sighs “why?”

“Nancy turns 40 in two weeks but they're going away for that and dad just wanted to surprise her.”

“Fuck that's right...well since it's Nance's birthday I'll be there.” she sighs and smiles at me. Robin is great she just has some social anxiety and doesn't like a lot of people at the same place any more. “They're calling them all in huh?” she continues

“Yeah, Mike, Jane, Jonathan, Will, Max, Lucas. Yeah and of course Dustin” I say

“Only one missing” Robin sighs “God I miss that fucker...like every day. And we weren't even that close. But every time Steve tells me about his latest calls I feel that pain again. You know where about he is now?” she looks so sad I just want to ruin dads surprise just to get her to smile

“I think dad said something about Nebraska and some bike dealership that needed a experienced mechanic. But that might have been last month too” I smile at her

“Well... as long as he's happy and healthy there's always hope he might swing by some day. At least to see Wayne before he...you know. Has Steve told him?” she looks at me

“Yeah, he did. I didn't hear the full extent of that conversation. Dad closed the door and then he said nothing of it after and I didn't want to be nosy” I tell her and she nods

“Well ok so party... dress code?” she tries to lighten the mood

“I was actually thinking the 80's... as a suggestion”

“YES! Cool! You know what” she rushes up off the couch and runs in to her bedroom. When she comes back out I roar and then I give her a loud cheer

“YES! Rob just yes!!” she is wearing her old Scoops Ahoy outfit that she wore for work the summer she and dad became best friends. “that's the perfect thing to wear! Dad's going to LOVE it I can't believe you still have it”

“Well that's because I'm a sentimental fool... Some things I just can't let go of” she grins at me “So this is a yes then”

“One thousand percent yes Rob! Now I'm SO pushing for the 80's for a theme” I laugh. She returns to the bedroom and changes back to her normal clothes. We talk a little more about my dilemma, agreeing that I should definitely talk some more to this guy if the opportunity arises. If there's a spark Robin will be my wing woman when telling dad. Oh... I hope that won't change if or when the cat's out of the bag.

We say good night and I head home. It's late so the house is dark when I come home. I sneak in so I don't wake dad and Nancy, and head straight for bed. I need to go to the library tomorrow and apply for a part time job there. Nancy had heard they were looking, and then I need to head over to Wayne's. That night I dream, and I dream VERY dirty things about a certain returning freak. I wake up while it's still dark out, panting and sweating. Not quite remembering what the dream was about just feeling that it was a hot dream, and well knowing WHO it was about. I try to turn on my stomach to fall back asleep, but the burning sensation inside of me and the throbbing between my legs will not subside. I lay back onto my back and sigh, ok so twice today I need to get myself off after meeting Eddie Munson. What the actual hell.

I let my hand wander over my body, it's quite nice as I've been told on several occasions. Just never paying any real attention to it. Nice decently large boobs, a  nice smallish waist and wider hips making me have the hourglass figure Nancy always says she'd pay good money to have. I let my fingers play over my belly and go lover. I slide them in between my legs ans I feel how soaking wet I am, even my pajama shorts are wet. I start circling my clit with my fingers, imagining it being Eddies fingers doing it. Takes about a minute before I have to bite my pillow to keep from screaming his name out loud into the night. I lay there panting for a while feeling very satisfied and at ease. Then sleeps comes to me and I drift off only to wake to my alarm blasting some old school Metallica through the speakers of my clock radio. I stretch and feel like a new person, “imagine what a few orgasm can do for the mood” I think and smile widely.

I get up, hit the shower and then I go down to make myself some breakfast. Smiling all the while. Then I head out the door and set my sights on the library, I get there only to find out I'm the fifth person that day to apply for the job. But seeing as I studied literature at college I have a slight advantage I'm informed. I smile and thank the head librarian for seeing me, he says they'll be in touch at the end of the week. I go to the grocery store and pick up some of Wayne's favorite snacks and some beers for him. Then I head over to the trailer park. Being in my own mind I forget once again that Wayne isn't alone anymore and that I maybe should knock instead of using the key and just entering. But that would have been too easy... so as I'm used to I just open the door and go in. At first I'm concentrating on the contents of the bag making sure I didn't forget anything in my car, so I'm not looking around. I put the bag and the beers on the counter and look up.

I stop breathing... in front of me I see Eddie, wearing nothing but a towel around his hips. Probably just out of the shower, I feel my knees once again going weak. He's with his back towards me, with headphones on so he hasn't noticed me yet. I study his back, it's muscular with a big tattoo across his shoulders. It says “Never forget” with a picture of some dark, pretty fucked up woods. They look like what dad described the woods they trekked through in the upside down looking like. Nice ass too, under that towel. I smile

Then he turns, he lets out a small yelp and flinches. I'm frozen... besides being so sexy it hurts to look at him... I stare, jaw dropped... those scars...like ten of them all over his torso. Looking like something scratched the flesh of...or ate it...could all of it be... true?

I can't take my eyes off him, I go up to him. Still not fully aware of what I'm doing, just going on instinct. I reach out and I touch him, I touch the scars. One by one I let my fingers drag over them. Then I snap out of it, looking at the scars, the chest, up at Eddie and down again. This is when I realize that when he flinched he dropped the towel, all that is shielding him from full exposure right now is his hand and the small part of the towel he has managed to grab before it fell completely.

“Ooooh... shit... sorry. I... but like wow Eddie” I just motion down his body with my hand. Then I turn blood red and I run off in to Wayne's bedroom. I hear a small laugh as I close the door behind me.

“Hey sweetheart, I'm so glad you could make it. Hey did you see Eddie? I would like a cup of tea but I think he's in the shower. Would you mind?” Wayne is smiling at me from his bed, I can't say no. No matter that the last thing I want to do now is go back out there.

“Sure Wayne, 2 sugars and a splash of milk right?”

“Perfect honey” he says. He looks worse than he did just 2 days ago. I open the door quietly and go out, I can hear Eddie is back in the bathroom. I sigh and I hurry out to the kitchen. I put a mug of water in the microwave and I get the tea, sugars and the milk out. I open the microwave before the beeps. I make the tea as Wayne likes it and I head back. Taking the bag of snacks and a beer with me as well.

“Here you go sweetie, I stopped and got you some snacks and beers too. I didn't know if Eddie has been out yet.” I say and set the things down on the table next to the bed.

“Oh aren't you the best ever! No he hasn't left the trailer park yet. He just sits on the stairs staring out into nothing smoking” Wayne looks worried “what happened really did a number on him sweetheart. I'm not sure he's ever really dug into that and talked about it with anyone.” he sighs. Then he sees the bag and smiles “lets see what you got me there” he ohs and ahs over the snacks I bought him saying I spoil him rotten then he kisses my forehead and I feel how hot he is.

“Wayne, do you have a fever? You're really hot” I put my hand on his head “Gees man you're burning up! Do you have any paracetamol at home?” I ask him

“I don't think so, began feeling really warm last night but I didn't want to bother Eddie...” he looks so broken

“And me? Forgot about me? I told you whatever you need Wayne I'll come running! I'll go check and if you don't have any I'll go get you some. You do not need that fever on top of everything else” I say with a stern voice

“Yes sweetheart, I know but you know me...old fart who won't bother people...” he looks ashamed and I just shake my head at him as I leave the room to check the medicine cabinet for paracetamol or anything that will make his temperature go down. I'm just about to fling the door open when I realize what might meet me in there so I give the door a careful knock.

“Eddie?” I say, the door opens and I meet his brown eyes

“Yeeeah...?” he drags the word smiling at me

“Do you have any paracetamol or something like that in here? Wayne is running quite a fever” I say hastily

“Ehm... oh... let me check” he turns around and opens the cabinet “doesn't seem like it”

“Ok, thanks for looking. I'll go buy some then. Keep an eye on him, if the temperature spikes call an ambulance...please” I say and I can feel my eyes tearing up. He looks at me and then he grabs me and pulls me in to his arms and gives me a hug.

“You really are every bit the angel he says you are” he whispers into my hair. I can't breath... he smells SO good. I draw one deep breath and he lets me go.

“Thank you, you're not the only one who loves him you know” I say and wipe the tears off my face before I turn and leave him standing there. I get in my car and drive back in to town. I run in to the pharmacy and grab whatever I can find that can lower a fever, and then I hurry back to the trailer park. When I turn on to the lot I see the ambulance and my heart sinks. I hurry out of my car and in to the trailer.

“Eddie what happened?” I throw the bag on the counter

“The second you left I heard him drop the mug and I ran in. He wasn't coherent anymore so I called right away. They got here like a minute ago.” he looks pale and I go up to him and without thinking about it I take his hand and I hold it tight. He looks down at my hand and smiles slightly.

The paramedics roll out Wayne and all I can see is his pale face and closed eyes. I don't even hear what they're saying. I have no idea how long I've been standing there but suddenly I'm shaken quite aggressively. I draw a deep breath and look into Eddies big worried eyes

“Oh thank God, I thought I'd have to call them back here...or that it was one of my nightmares” he sighs and lets go of me

“What?” I can't really wrap my head around anything he's saying

“You went totally blank, you haven't moved or made a single sound since they left with Wayne” he says and looks at me

“Left...they left already?”

“Sweetheart....that was 20 minutes ago... they're probably at the hospital by now.” Eddie says and he looks at me like he thinks I'm joking

“What? No? But I just... what did they say then?” I can feel the tears running down my face

“They'll call here as soon as they're able to stabilize him. He had a very high temperature, it was good they said that you caught that otherwise he might have slipped in to a coma like state before I would have noticed him. He was a bit more coherent when they rolled him out to the ambulance though. But how about you, are you ok?” he puts his hands on my arms and rubs them. I look up at him with tears streaming down my face.

“I... I don't know Eddie... But would you mind if I stay here? Dad and Nancy are away for the night at some business thing. I don't want to be alone in that big house... I won't be in your way I can sleep on the couch I've done that many times before...”

“Uhhhh... of course you can stay. But you can take Wayne's bed if that's ok. I mean I've been sleeping on the couch since I came so I don't mind” he smiles at me and all I can do is nod. I feel numb.

“I need to go home and get some things. Are you sure you're ok with me being here tonight? I can go to Robin's... but I kinda wanna be here when they call...” I say in a small voice

“I don't mind at all, could be nice having some company. Wayne has been sleeping a lot the last couple of days so. You come back when or if you feel like it, I can make us dinner.” he's so nice... I start crying again. He pulls me in and hugs me tight again “It's going to be ok sweetheart...it's going to be ok” I feel him kissing the top of my head and then he gasps and I feel him getting tense. What happened? He lets me go and clears his throat “Well...ehmm...you said you needed to go?”

“Yes...ok... yeah I guess I'll go. I will be back in a while. Do you need anything? Can I pick something up for you?” I ask, I so want to do something nice for him seeing as he has to have me around all night

“Some smokes, I saw you bought beers for Wayne. Mind if I drink 'em?” he smiles

“Smokes, got it! No absolutely, go ahead, I can get more. I might need a couple myself” I smile back at him and then I head out.

I sit in my car and at first I can't seem to get my mind organized enough to get going. But then I shake my head and convince myself that everything will, as Eddie told me, be ok! I drive back home and I pack the necessities. I also pack dads old high school yearbook. Thinking I might get some inside scoops about dad and the rest of the gang. IF I get Eddie to talk to me about those days. I drive in to town and get the smokes and some more beers. I also buy some chips and I have a strong need for some ice cream and not the cheap kind. I indulge in some Ben and Jerry's. Chocolate of course because we all know that mends a broken heart! I decide to stop along the road to call dad and tell him the situation.

“Well...you sure he's ok with this? I mean... I know you love Wayne, we all do...” dad sounds skeptical.

“Yeah, I asked like three times. He's ok with it, I even suggested I stay with Robin, he wouldn't hear of it... it's just one night, and I really need to be there if they call about Wayne. Plus I think he's lonely dad... Wayne said he hadn't left the trailer at all since arriving. Just to sit on the stairs smoking. I... he's nice... I want to get to know him.” I can hear my dad smiling

“Yeah he is great. Ok but call me if there's any news. If you're upset have him call me ok?”

“Yeah I will, I'll tell Eddie you said hello. Give my love to Nancy and have a great time see you tomorrow night dad. Love you!”

“Love you to honey”

We hang up and I sit there thinking for a bit. I do like Eddie...just...well not ONLY the way I made it sound to dad. I can still feel his arms around me, rubbing my arms, that kiss on my head...and his intoxicating smell... oh my God but then the memory of him tensing up when holding me just before I left. He has no such feelings towards me apparently so there's that... but damn I would want him to! I must be fucking delusional wishing a man twice my age would fancy me. But a girl can dream, can't she? No harm , no foul... I shake my head to snap out of these thoughts before my mind wanders too far. I start my car again and drive the rest of the way back to the trailer park. Just as I stop the car my phone rings, it's Robin.

“Hey sweets, heard your dad and Nance are out of town tonight. Girl's night?”

“Hey Rob, nah sorry. I'm going to hang at the trailer park tonight.”

“Wayne ok?” she sounds worried

“No, not really...had to send him in an ambulance. He was burning up... but I told the paramedics to call there if they got him stable enough to back home. You know he hates the hospital” small lie but...

“You gonna be ok there on your own then? Should I come over?” I love that she cares so much

“I'll be fine, might call you later though if don't fall asleep early. I feel totally beat” I tell her and she agrees to stay at home and tells me to call about anything. Just before we hang up I hear her

“HEY! That guy? Seen him again?” now she just sounds curious

“Yeah I had a quick chat with him earlier... I think he is one of the good ones, but I don't think he fancies me. I think I'm to young...” I say

“Men!” she scoffs “don't know what's good for 'em. The times I had to lead your dad in the right direction” she laughs “well if you'll really be ok sweetie I wish you a good night then and I'll talk to you later”

“I'll need to hear more about that dad thing later!” I say and laugh “night Rob” then I hang up, smiling about that comment about dad. I mean I know he was a real ladies man back in the day. It's just now I see that Eddie is sitting on the stairs looking right at me. I get out of the car and I get the things in the back.

“Has anyone ever told you just how much you look like your dad when you laugh?” Eddie smiles at me

“Ha ha...yeah Wayne points it out often. Saying I look like him a lot, but most of all when I laugh. Only that I'm prettier”

“Hell yeah, no argument there” he smiles. I look at him, what was that?

“Yeah? Not seduced by the hair Eddie?” I say and wink at him, why the HELL did I wink?

“Don't really swing that way, but I did envy him for making it look so easy back then” he laughs and the sound of it sends a shiver down my spine. I want to make him laugh all the time!

“Really? It?” I say as I walk past him and open the door

“Yeah getting the pretty girls, was never good at it myself.” he gets up and follows me in again. He sits down on the couch and watches me put away the ice cream and the beers. I throw the smokes at him he catches them mid air. “Thanks! What do I owe you?”

“Forget about it, I'm just happy you agreed to show up. For everyone's sake, even if only dad and Wayne know at the moment. But believe me you'll feel some real love on Saturday...” I say and I give him a warm smile. He snorts

“Yeah right... From who? None of them really miss me I bet, except your dad then perhaps”

“Eddie Munson! Now you fucking listen to me ok! Every time dad mentions talking to you Dustin starts crying, I spent the evening with Robin the other night she said she misses you every day! Mike is heartbroken... STILL...he won't even say your name. Nancy loves you and wants to know every single detail about your calls with dad. All I ever heard growing up here is how amazing you were and how much they all wished you'd come back to them. So get over yourself and accept they all love you and they will be SO happy to see you Saturday!” I don't know what came over me raising my voice at him like that. He's stunned...just looking at me. I see tears forming in the corner of his eyes.

“I... I didn't think... I'm just...me...” he sounds defeated.

“Yeah, and just YOU is what everyone wants” I say and sit down on the other end of the couch

“Everyone?” there's a curious tone in his voice I can't really place

“Yes...they all want you back in their life. Couldn't you just consider letting them have that for a while? I bet you could get some work as a mechanic around here somewhere. Or do you have employment you need to get back to? Or someone you need to get back to?” I ask my voice getting smaller at the end

“No...on both accounts. No job at the moment and no one waiting. I can tell you I have thought about it, but it's...hard being here” he looks out the window and a dark shadow falls on his face

“You want to talk about it Eddie?” I reach out my hand and I put it on his knee. He stares at my hand then he gets up.

“No!” then he leaves and goes outside, slamming the door behind him. I feel like I was just hit across the face by him. I... I just touched his knee. I mean he didn't even react that bad this morning when I touched the scars... Tears flood my eyes and fall down my face. I get up and go lock myself in the bathroom, I need a shower and then I'm going to crawl into bed with Ben and Jerry... they don't act like this! They only give love...and calories! When I get out of the shower and go to the kitchen to get the ice cream Eddie is still out there. I can see him sitting on the table outside the door looking up at the sky. I take what I was looking for and I go back to the bedroom and close the door behind me. I lie down in bed and I turn on the small TV Wayne has at the end of his bed. Dirty Dancing is on, I love that movie. It's just easy going enough for this evening. I hear the door opening and steps heading towards my door. They stop outside...then I hear a faint

“I'm so sorry” then the steps go back to the living room. I have to stop myself from getting up and run out there to tell him I would forgive anything he said or did if he'd just...what? Touch me? Kiss me? Love me? I finish the ice cream then I turn the TV off and pull the covers up and faster than I thought I would I fall asleep. It's early, like 6 am when I am woken up by muffled screams from the living room. Like the ones you can “hear” yourself screaming in your dreams. I get out of bed in a second thinking they've called about Wayne and he's not ok. I run out to the couch fully thinking I'd find Eddie sitting there crying. But instead I see him asleep on the couch, writhing and “screaming” in his sleep, he's drenched in sweat and his breathing is really agitated. I kneel next to the couch and I softly shake him

“Eddie, sweetie... you're ok. Please wake up” I shake him a little harder and his eyes jerks open and he looks at me with panic in them. I rub his arms and I smile at him “see...you're fine I'm right here” he's panting and he sits up dragging his hand through his hair still not talking to me. I get up and I sit down on his lap and put my arms around him. Not because I want to, but more because I feel like he needed me to be near. I can feel his heart beating SO hard in his chest. I hug him tight and I nuzzle my head against his neck. At first he isn't moving a muscle, then I feel him relaxing and I can feel his hands. One is around my back, stroking it and one lays on my thigh softly caressing the skin with the thumb. His breathing has gone from heavy and agitated to just heavy. I hear him draw breath and say in a coarse voice

“Uhmm... thank you Hailey... but could you please get up?”

“Oh sorry” I blush “I know I must be too heavy...sorry” I start to get up but his hands are still holding me “ehmmm.. Eddie I can't get up. You have to let me go”

“The issue is NOT you being too heavy, never ever think that... I don't WANT  to let you go... but if you keep sitting there dressed like that...lets just say I like it too much ok?” he groans.

“Dressed like....oooooh fuck” this is when I realize I'm sitting on his lap wearing only my panties and a very small top... Wayne's bedroom was too hot to wear a pajama so I took it off. “Sorry...well you still have to let me go Eddie... I'm already liking this too much myself“ I say with a hushed voice, I can't look at him

“Like Sunday night when you came here? And you made my blanket all wet with your juices?” he whispers, his fingers now moving slowly up my thigh

“You...noticed?” I think I might die now... this is too embarrassing

“Yeah, the way your eyes were full of panic and I saw you were eyeing me..then the folding of the blanket and the sitting on that instead of the couch... God I must say you smell soooo good. I couldn't let that blanket go all night...I rubbed myself with it...” he goes silent like he isn't sure if this is too much. I pull my head away from his neck and I look at him, is he for real?

“You? From my...scent?” I blush

“Ehm... yeah three times... Your scent and the image of you looking at me with that look you have... I don't know if you know this but when you're turned on your eyes burn...” he mumbles

“I've never been turned on like that so no... I had no idea...” I say with honesty, he looks at me perplexed.

“Never? Are you...?” he lets me go

“Oh no, I'm not a virgin. No, not at all... just... I've never been really...horny for anyone... until...that night” well...this it then. Hit or miss, win or lose it's out there now. There is a tense silence for a second, neither him or me move a muscle. Then I feel the hand on my thigh is back, tentatively moving further up than before. I look at him, before I can stop myself I press my lips against his. At first he doesn't move, then his hand grabs the flesh of my inner thigh and he kisses me back. Fuuuuuck he's a good kisser. I part from him and I get up so I can change position and straddle him there on the couch. I sit down again on his lap and now I can tell he does like this as much as I do. I moan, and I move my hips so that the hardness I can feel below the blanket rubs my pussy just right. A deep groan slips out from Eddie mouth and he grabs my neck and pulls me in to kiss me again. His tongue plays on my lips begging to be let in. I open my mouth and meet his tongue with my own. We kiss as his hands move over my thighs around to grab my ass. He moans loudly

“God damn girl...this is some good quality ass. Can't wait to show you what I can do with it”

I might fucking pass out now, I have never felt anything like this. Never ever from any sexual encounter, or from any time I've played on my own. So this is what everyone's on about. I arch my back and lean slightly back, Eddie looks at me and his hand slide up my belly, up my chest and grabs my boobs.

“Fuuuuck these are just as perfect, can't wait to see them. Can we move this to the bed? More room...” he groans and I can only nod at this point. He grabs a hold of my ass and then he stands up carrying me to the bedroom with me wrapping my legs around him. He sets me down on the bed, this is when I realize he sleeps in the nude. I had such easy access... I would have only needed to reach down under the blanket and I would have gotten a handful of Eddie... and full it would have been. Holy shit what a cock!!! I think I actually lick my lips while admiring his naked frame. He lets out a guttural laugh

“See anything you like there?” I nod, can't seem to find my voice “well... seeing as I'm all naked I think I need to help you slide out of what little you're wearing too babe” he grabs the edge of my top and yanks it up over my boobs and then over my head. “Wow would you look at those, just as I thought, perfection” his eyes are glittering at me like dark brown pools of water, he motions to me to lay down. I do and he smiles and bends down to grab my panties and slowly start pulling them down “now the real price...oh my god...you're so fucking sexy” I could get used to this I think and I feel myself blushing at his intense stare.

“No need for that babe, you are a very sexy woman. Trust me... I've got seniority here” he smirks at me. Then he lies down on top of me, he starts kissing me deeply. Moving his hands over my body moaning softly as he does. I let my hands slide up his back and grab a hold of that hair I've been dying to touch since I first saw his picture in dads yearbook. It feels every bit as fantastic as I thought it would when I bury my fingers in it slightly tugging at it making Eddie moan coarsely.

“That's a good girl right there, I like having my hair pulled... especially when I do this...” he smiles at me as he looks down at me. Then he trails kisses down my neck, down my chest. Giving the boobs some much wanted attention, then he creeps further down. He plunges his head down between my thighs, drawing in a deep breath and moaning

“Fuuuuck, this scent... it's fucking mesmerizing” then he leans in and lets his tongue do the work. He licks the outside of my folds with a light touch making me squirm trying to press harder against his mouth, he chuckles “Oh I'll get there babe, don't worry” he slides the tip of his tongue in between the folds finding my clit and flicks it. I let out a high pitched gasp. He starts eating my pussy with a passion alternating flicking my clit with the tip of his tongue and licking the juices from between the folds. He keeps making these incredible sounds of pleasure and I grab a hold of his hair again tugging it while also pressing his face into me. He groans and I feel him sliding a finger in to me, hitting exactly the right spot right away. Oh this man knows his way around... holy shit. I'm writhing now, screaming out my pleasure. It's almost to intense, being the first time I ever felt anything like this. I feel like I'm about to explode everywhere, my breaths are just exiting in small gasps now and I moan like I'm possessed. He slides one more finger in and starts scissoring them inside. That sends me over the edge and I let our a guttural scream as I feel myself literally explode on his face. The orgasm he gives me is the best thing I've ever felt, how is it even possible to feel this level of pleasure? As I come down from my high and he crawls up next to me I see his face is WET like just out of the shower wet.

“That's one good girl... squirting your first time with me. I take that as a compliment like no other” he purrs and I feel confused. I look down the bed and it looks like I fucking peed the bed...or no more like I poured a glass of water in it. I almost panic and I look at him, he instantly reassures me

“No, NO babe it's all good...really...this is a good thing. It was so fucking sexy” he growls at me leaning in for a kiss. I can smell and taste myself on him. I feel his massive hard-on pressing at my leg and I let my hands slide down to it. I softly touch the tip, rubbing the bead of pre-cum that's leaked out. I pull my hand up and I lick my finger to taste him. He tastes so good, he groans and stares at my finger intensely. I grab a handful of his hair and I tug it back making his neck exposed, he grunts and I lick his neck while my other hand strokes what I can barely get my fingers to meet around. I can't help myself, while licking down his neck I bite down. Just a small nibble but it seems to send this man into a frenzy. He growls and grabs me, pulling me up on top of him, he feels like a mad man when he impales me with that massive cock. It slides right in with ease and I groan feeling him fill me up entirely. He fucks me with a desire that's almost scary, moaning and holding my ass in an iron grip. Feels like I'm being fucked by a jackhammer. I lean down and kiss him deeply, moaning in his ear

“Eddie babe, slow down a bit. I'm not going anywhere this won't be your last time with me”  I sit back up and he looks up at me with burning eyes, he does slow down. Letting me set the pace for a while. I roll my hips and go slow up and down, just as a total opposite of what he did. He groans loudly, his hands still on my ass massaging the flesh. I lean back so he can see me play with myself as his big cock goes in and out of me soft insides.

“Fuck babe...fuck... you feel amazing. Come on me please, come on meeeee... fuck I'm close babe” I rub my clit feeling I'm closing in again myself, I pick up the pace of my hip-action too. I  feel it now that sweet feeling right before release, but this time SO much stronger than ever before. I scream as I am sent over the edge once again, I feel my pussy squeeze the cock inside me. I hear Eddie's tipping over too now, his fingers are digging in to my flesh and he growls and then he lets out a guttural scream as he fills me up with his hot seed. He spasms under me and I feel his cock throbbing inside me as the last squirts leaves his body. I slump down on his chest to catch my breath. His grip on my ass loosens and he wraps his arms around me.

“Do you have any idea what you're doing to me? But...we didn't take...ehm precautions babe” he whispers

“I'm on the pill Ed, I'm not about to do what dad did...” I smile as I press my face against his chest breathing in his scent. I don't ever want to get up...never ever.

“Well that's a responsible girl right there” he chuckles caressing my back kissing the top of my head “but I do think we need to talk right?” I look up at him

“Yeah... I guess we do. Maybe get up, take a shower and meet in the living room?” I say and kiss him

“Sounds like a plan, ladies first” he gives my ass a small slap and smiles. I get off him and roll out of the bed and head for the shower

“Hey Hailey” I hear as I'm about to go out the door I turn and look at him “don't think I regret this at all...ok?” he says and I smile at him

“Likewise Eddie...not for a second” I say and leave for the shower. I let the water rinse the smell of him off me, sadly. I look down and see he left some marks on my boobs and well... my ass will look like I've taken a beating. I smile widely, being branded by Eddie Munson isn't the worst thing. I giggle as I leave the shower to dry off and put on the clothes I left in here earlier. I get out of the shower and I call in to the bedroom

“Your turn Ed” I hear him answer a thank you and then he shows up in the doorway, still naked and looking like a million dollars. I feel weak at the knees again and I blush.

“Wow, what's this? My naked body makes you blush now? Forgot what you were doing to it just a little while ago?” he smirks at me

“That's why I'm blushing idiot, you have no right being that sexy...not all the time.” I say and now it's his turn to blush

“Oh...stop it... I'm not...you can't” he stutters

“I'll decide that for myself thank you. Accept it and move on Munson. Now shower” I smile and give him a wink. He looks up and gives me a salute and goes in to the bathroom and I hear the water start running. I go in to the kitchen, suddenly feeling ravished. Right, I haven't eaten anything but ice cream since breakfast yesterday. Eddie said he'd cook but the weird moment on the couch happened and I went to bed instead. I look in the fridge, looks like I could make some pancakes and bacon. I love cooking, I start singing to myself as I prepare the food for us. I'm really in to rock from like the 70's and 80's. They just made it better back then, one of my favorite songs to sing is “Crazy train” by Ozzy, dad always smiles when he hears me singing it “Eddie would be proud you have his taste in music” I'm zoning out cooking and singing to myself. I don't hear Eddie coming out of the shower positioning himself in the doorway watching me. I finish the food, putting it on plates and turning to get some drinks for us when I see him standing there. I yelp

“The fuck Eddie? You scared me...how long have you been there?” I say suspiciously

“Long enough babe, you can sing! Like really good Hailey. That's not the easiest song to sing without music... Also I strongly approve the choice” he applauds me

“Yeah... I bet, you know being brought up to stories of the famous Eddie Munson and his rock 'n roll ways influenced my music taste. Dad always says you'd be proud if you knew” I blush “yeah and of course I've heard all about Corroded Coffin!” I say and smile

“Hell.. I haven't heard that name in probably 15 years...” he spaces out for a moment probably reliving his band days. He snaps out of it “but yeah Steve has a point you do have excellent taste if Ozzy is in the mix.” he leans on the counter looking at me.

“Lets sit down and eat I'm starving” I say and motion for him to take a seat at the table. I bring over the plates of food and some orange juice, and I take a seat opposite him.

“Ok...so... fucks like a goddess, cooks AND sings... You sure you're a Harrington?” he chuckles

I roar with laughter at this

“Well the fucking is your opinion I had no idea...thank you I guess” I smile “But the cooking dad taught me yes, the singing is from mom, she's a really good singer.” I say and Eddie starts laughing

“Riiiight you have a mom... Steve was always the mom of the group so I just keep thinking he did it all on his own” I laugh at this knowing well what he meant, I heard the stories. Steve the babysitter/ mommy Steve.

“No, I do have a mom, granted I think dad forgets sometimes to” I giggle

Eddie looks at me, now with a more serious look to his face

“What are we doing here? I can't really believe we did what we just did... you're Steve's kid... you're so”

“If the next words out of your mouth is 'so young' or some other crap like that I'm out” I warn him

“But... it's not like we're the same age here sweetheart. I mean I don't mind, I don't feel like 42 and you don't act 21... But the rest? Your dad... society at large?” he's so serious now

“I don't know how to deal with dad just yet... Society can fuck it self. You've always been some kind of ideal for me. The thing I always wanted, the guy for me, but finding another you has been impossible. I found the real deal here and I sure as hell don't want to give it up...unless you want me to...” I look at him, I can feel the tears. He stares at me

“Ideal? Me? How is that even a thing... I've always been the screw up, the freak.” he sounds like he doesn't trust me to tie my own shoes even

“Well, I've been brought up hearing all the stories about you. How you we're the best 'brother' Dustin ever had, how you we're so sweet to everyone who got to know you. How you saved them... The talk of your music taste, your taste in films, the way you looked. Hell that made me fall in love with that guy, idolizing him for years, wanting to find a guy just like you... believe me... there ARE NO guys like you out there” I give him a shy smile with a tear running down my face

“I...don't know what to say. They talk about me like that? By the way...the way I looked? Yearbook?” he asks and I nod, get up and go to my bag and bring out the old copy of Hawkins High 1986. I lay it down on the table put my hand on it

“Dads most treasured possession, I used to flip through this with him growing up asking him to tell me about Eddie. When I got to the age where hormones started flying I'd sneak this in to bed with me...” I say whispering the last words and getting a gasp in return

“You...with yourself to MY yearbook pictures?” I nod shyly “wow...that's...intense. I mean now that you're an adult I would take it as the best fucking compliment ever. We don't need to talk more about that teenage hormone thing” he shrugs “That's a bit disturbing”

“Yeah I heard the way that sounded as I said it... I mean I've done it now as an adult to... the first night we met...” I look down at the table “but I didn't need the yearbook with me anymore... I was just fine without it”

“So that night, when you came here and met me for the first time. You what? Went home and got yourself off thinking about me?” I can see the underlying doubt in his eyes like he can't believe anyone would do that

“Yup... twice...” I really needn't say more than that...

“So I win then” he gives me a goofy smile “I jacked off to that blanket and your scent three times... I win” he explains when seeing my confused face

“Idiot!” I say and laugh “it's not about who came the most number of times to thinking about the other... it's about how HARD you came... quality over quantity Munson. Who knows maybe I won” I can't help myself teasing him, it just feels so natural. Like we've been friends forever and we seriously JUST met, that's how long my head has been filled with all things Eddie Munson. I know him, and I feel safe with him already.

He looks at me jaw dropped, then he roars

“That was the best fucking thing I've heard in like forever! You're funny too, who'd known with that dad of yours? Also from your mom I guess” he chuckles

“Hey be nice to dad, he never needed to be funny he got the ladies anyway” I make a face at him

“HA! Yeah you're right there I suppose, love the guy but he wasn't exactly a bright light when it came to humor. Hell even Mike was funnier” I can see Eddie drifting off into his memories again and I can feel myself giving him a warm smile from across the table

“Promise me to always smile at me like that Hailey” I hear him whisper “that smile heals me somehow it makes me feel like life isn't that fucking bad anymore” a tear has spilled out of his eye slowly making it's way down his face.

I get out of my seat and I go up to him and sit down in his lap. I look him deep in the eyes as I wipe the tear way with my fingers. I kiss his cheek and wrap my arms around his neck and give him a warm hug.

“I promise to smile at you like that forever if you promise me that some day you'll talk to me... about this” I say and I touch one of the scars on his shoulder. He tenses up

“I don't... I can't... Not now”

“No, no Eddie. It doesn't have to be now it can be 10 years from now...just some day. Because just like Wayne I think you need to. He's so worried about you” I lean in to kiss his cheek again but he turns his head so I hit his lips instead. At fist it's just a soft kiss but it turns into something so much more within seconds. There is no denying the explosive chemistry we have. The kisses deepen, become more desperate more passionate. Eddies hands are everywhere at once, like he doesn't know which part of me he wants to touch first. We're suddenly jolted back to reality by the phone ringing. I jump up from Eddies knee and go to answer it

“Shouldn't I?” he says

“It could be Robin calling to see if I'm ok... you know on my own” I wink at him and he nods

“Hello, Munson residence” I say

“Hello. Is this Ms. Harrington? This is Doctor Wells from Hawkins Memorial. I wanted to tell you that Mr. Munson is now awake and fully lucid again. But he is still running quite the high fever so we'd like to keep him here a few more days for observation. He was due for his labs and cancer exams as well so we're doing those at the same time. He's not too happy staying” I hear a smile at the other end

“Oh thank you! No I know he's not a fan of hospitals. But he's ok... you know as ok as he can be? Can I visit him?” I say and feel a lot of tension just drain from my body and I fall down on to the floor my legs can't hold me anymore. Eddie panics and runs up to me

“You ok? Say you're ok or ask that doctor to send someone”  I pet his arm and nod

“I'm ok...” I whisper

“Well... the fever isn't a good sign but if we can get that under control there's nothing keeping him from coming home on say Thursday afternoon. Visiting hours are between 2 and 7. He wanted me to tell you to bring him snacks and a fishing magazine” I hear the doctor continuing on the other end.

“Ok, I'll see to it that he gets what he wants. Thank you again doctor.” I say and we hang up. Eddie is watching me intensely

“So?”

“He's awake and lucid now. The fever is still there so they're keeping him a couple of days. He's to undergo all lab work and exams for the cancer too now that he's there already. I might be able to get him Thursday afternoon. But for now he wants snacks and a fishing magazine” I start to giggle, then I begin to cry. I'm a blubbering mess on the floor I feel Eddies strong arms wrap around me picking me up from the floor and carrying me to the bedroom. He puts me down on the bed and lays down with me wrapping his arms around me again.

“You cry sweetheart, you cry. I'll be here for you” he caresses my back with one hand and the other hand is in my hair holding my head close to his chest.

“I love you....” I freak out what the fuck was I saying? “I mean... oh wow... I mean I love how you're so sweet to me”

“Ahem... well that's not hard princess. You're easy to be sweet to seeing as you're such an amazing person yourself...and don't worry I didn't take offense. You're growing on me too”

I start to giggle at the same time as I'm still crying about Wayne. He didn't mind...

“Well good... I am sorry though...it just kind of slipped out” my face is a very pleasant shade of beetroot right now and I can't look at him. He puts a finger under my chin and tilts my head up so our eyes meet

“I know that you didn't mean for that to come out the way it did. But Hailey...you can't love me” he sounds so beaten o small

“Why? I'm fully capable of feelings you know AND of deciding for myself what those feelings are ” I argue

“Darling, I'm 100 shades of fucked up... and yes some day I might be able to talk to you about it. But I don't know when that might be... Why would you put yourself in that situation? With me?”

“Eddie...sweet sweet Eddie. I've loved you without knowing you for years... I didn't change from meeting you, it just made it so much stronger. When you look at me I feel things I've only ever read about, when you touch me Oh My Fucking God Eddie...you rock my world. I never ever thought I was even able to feel like that from someone's touch and here you came and it was just apparent I wasn't broken I just hadn't found the right person... and the right person is you. I don't fucking care about the age thing, those are just numbers. I don't care about the looks or the whispers that will come. I want to be here loving you and helping you cope with whatever it is that's hurting you so bad. I know, yeah dad and the others might be a hurdle on  the way but all anyone ever wanted was for you to be happy. And I mean they all love me so... I guess they'd want happiness for me too. But we'll take this slow, we're not outing this on Saturday if that's what you're worried about. But Eddie please...PLEASE do not say I can't love you. It's way to late for that...” Now that I finally seemed to find the words for what I was thinking all along I couldn't seem to stop. All the while as I'm talking Eddie is looking right at me, his eyes burn from the inside. When I'm done I just look back at him and there is silence for like a minute and I begin to think I've fucked up so bad here. He draws a deep breath and then he pulls me even closer and lets his lips softly brush against mine.

“You really are everything I didn't think I'd ever need” he whispers and then he presses his lips against mine in a deep desperate kiss. We lay there for a while kissing, touching. Only wanting to be near. Then I hear the sound of my cellphone ringing.

“I'm sorry Eddie” I pant as we release from each others lips “but I need to answer that so no one comes here looking for me” I get out of bed and I find my phone

“Hello”

“Hey sweetie, you ok?”

“Oh hi Robin, yeah I'm ok. Just about to head to the hospital to visit Wayne. They're keeping him for a few days.”

“Oh, but he's better now?”

“Yeah, a bit of a fever still but the doctor thinks he might be able to go home Thursday” I explain

“Well that's good to hear, you want me to come with you?” she asks and as much as I would have loved to see her right now I have a plan that would falter completely if she came around.

“Nah I'm ok, gonna buy him some snacks and a magazine and then I think I'm gonna head home, take a shower and a nap. Didn't sleep well” I look over at Eddie and I smile, he smirks back at me and gives me a wink.

“Ok, but if you change your mind..”

“Yes Robin, I'll call and you'll be right over. I know. Love ya”

“Love ya too weirdo!” she gives a small giggle and hangs up

Eddie's still on the bed looking at me. I SO want to crawl back there and just lie in his arms for the rest of...well forever. But I know I need to get home, change, get the stuff for Wayne and then be back home before dad and Nancy return. I tell Eddie this then I say

“Would you like to come with me to see Wayne? No one you know works at the hospital, well as far as I know anyway.”

“I don't know... Wasn't I supposed to hide?” he says and smiles at me

“Yes you're to be invisible until Saturday if dad has his way. But I thought you could hide in the backseat of my car. I know Wayne would be happy to see you.”

“Sure, let me just have a quick change”

“I think I'm going to go home and do the same, and then stop and get the stuff from the store. Then I'll pick you up. Visiting hours start at 2 the doctor said so say I'm back here at 2:30?”

“Eddie looks at his watch “1,5 hours? Sure sounds great, but Hailey”

“Yeah?”

“Come here” he reaches out for me I go up to the bed he pulls me down on top of him

“Thank you for pouring your heart out... If that's the way you feel I can't stop you. And it did make me very happy to hear” he kisses me and lets his hand slide down the back of my body landing on my ass. He grabs it and presses me close “I know you can feel the effect you have on me, and I hope you'll be back tonight because I want to really show you they way you make me feel about your touch” he growls in my ear and I feel like I'm about to pass out. I feel the twitch against my lower belly and I let out a moan.

“I'll be back as soon as I can because THAT sounds very very much like something I wanna know more about” I whisper and I let my tongue slide from his earlobe down to his collarbone, there I give him a little bite and he groans.

“Fucking go now before I tie you to the bed and have my way with you instead of visiting my sick uncle...go” he slaps my ass and I giggle

“Ok Mr boss man... I'll be back at 2:30” I say and I leave and head out to my car. My mind STUCK on the “I tie you to the bed and have my way with you” comment wishing he'd actually do that. I get home, I jump in the shower and then I put on a dress I know Wayne really likes. If he's to be stuck in the hospital I want to make him happy, and he always said that dress made me look so pretty it lit up any dark day when I wore it.

I remember that I still have dads yearbook in my bag. I need to get it back in case they return home before I'm back from the hospital. I flip it open to the page where a grinning Eddie is seen with his Hellfire pals. I love that picture, he looks so carefree. I touch the image of him and I put the book back on the shelf. I head out and go to town to get snacks and the magazine. There's literally 12 different magazines all about fishing... I buy 6 of them, seeing as a few of them is about fly fishing and a few about deep sea fishing. Two things I know Wayne doesn't do. Then I buy and abundance of snacks and I leave for the trailer park again. I go up to the door and I knock this time, I can hear nothing inside but I notice the curtain by the window move slightly. Then the door opens.

“Hell I wasn't sure if that was you or someone else. NOW you knock?” he chuckles and stands aside so that I can go inside. He closes the door behind me and pulls me close. “fuck Hailey, that dress... you look stunning!” he kisses me deeply and lets his hands slide over my body

“Awww thank you, but as much as I want to say it's all for you... Sorry but this one is for Wayne, he always loved me in this dress” I say and Eddie fakes a heartache grabbing his chest and gasping

“I am replaced...by my own uncle” he smirks at me “But he's not wrong for liking you in that dress. Though I have a whole other line of thought about it...and what's under it” he squeezes my ass through the thin fabric. I feel my panties getting damp and my nipples harden.

“Eddie.... I wish we had time for this right now but we need to go. But I promise I'll be back tonight...and you CAN tie me to the bed and have your way with me” I say and press my tits against his chest making him let out a rumble like moan.

“I can? Like... for real? Don't tease me woman...” he holds me tight so that I can feel his dick against me.

“If you calm down now... you can go crazy later... yes” I purr and wiggle free from his arms opening the door and stepping outside to make sure no one is around.

“Calm down... easy for her to say... can't tell she's horny” I hear him mutter behind me as he locks the door and follows me to my car. I smile at him

“I love that I can tell you want me Eddie, and if I thought it wouldn't make things even worse for you I'd have you feel me so you could tell I'm just as bad off as you” I say and he moans.

“Yeah that would have made us late, thanks for being the level headed one here” he scoffs

He sits down in the backseat of my car, then I have him lie down on the seat and I put a few blankets over him so it just looks like I'm hauling around a bunch of stuff back there.

I drive off, luckily for Eddie the hospital isn't far from the trailer park. Must be getting hot under there. We get there and Eddie draws a deep breath as I remove the pile of blankets from him and he gets fresh air again.

“Hell... it was almost as hot under there as it is between your legs” he murmurs at me with a smirk

I blush “Eddieee... behave please” I say and he chuckles at me as we leave the car and head in to the hospital. We get up to the ward where the nice lady at the front desk tells us Wayne is admitted.

“He's in room 214” she told us. We find it straight away and as I open the door my heart sinks and I push against Eddie making him stop.

“Hi dad? You're here... alone?” my voice sounds so strange that both dad and Wayne look at me with weird looks .

“Yes... I'm here. And yes I'm alone... Nancy had some errands to run why do you sound like that?”

I sigh a deep sigh of relief and I motion to the door. Eddie walks in

“This is why I wanted to know if you were alone... I brought Wayne a gift” I say and I go up to the bed and hug the man in it. “Hey sweetie how you doin'?” I say

“Oh! Hey Ed, I sure wasn't expecting you...” dad looks at me

“No dad no one saw him I hid him in the backseat under some blankets” I say and I smile he laughs out loud and so does Wayne.

“Hell Munson I thought your days of hiding in backseats were over” dad laughs and Eddie blushes. Oh really now? I look at him, raise one eyebrow and smirk

“Yeah...” he clears his throat “y'know old habits die hard. Plus I wanted to visit this old geezer and she had strict rules to not let me be seen until Saturday so we had to improvise” he says and drags a hand through his hair with a smile at dad.

“Yeah she always was the smart one in the family” dad chuckles. I lean over to Wayne and I fix his pillow and I take out the bag I have with me.

“So Wayne, snacks and enough reading material to keep you occupied at least for a couple of days” I say and smile at him. He takes the bag and looks down in to it.

“I said A fishing magazine love...” he laughs

“Yes, well math was never my strongest subject... and how was I to know which one you'd like. Better be safe than sorry” I laugh and he takes my hand and squeezes it hard. He looks a lot better today than he's been doing the last week or so.

“Well Steve, you did good here. Who'd have thought something this good could come from you” Wayne looks at dad with a grin and Eddie roars

“Well put Wayne, been thinking the same myself. And I don't even know the girl like you do”

Dad looks from one to the other of the Munson men in the room.

“Yeah I can feel the love here...”

I hug dad and whisper in his ear “remember one is sick and the other...well the other is Eddie” he chuckles at this and nods at me

“You are so right honey didn't think of that. But now that you're here I'm going to leave so Nancy doesn't show up an spoil my surprise. See you at home sweetie. See you Saturday Ed, and Wayne... you take care now!”

We all say good bye to him and we sit down by Wayne's bedside

“So how you doing Wayne? You look better today” I can tell by the tone in his voice that Eddie is super worried about the man who raised him.

“Yeah, doctors said I was hell'a lucky this one felt how warm I was when she did.  And that she told you to keep an eye on me. I think I had a fever for quite some time...” he looks over at me with a shameful smile “but I didn't think it was that bad.” I look at him with a stern face he smiles again and continues “but yeah I feel a lot better now that they got the fever down and fluids in me. I seem to have...ehmm...forgot to drink as much as I should have. Apparently tea and beer don't count” he chuckles

“No shit Sherlock” I sigh at him and Eddie laughs

“This one is tough Wayne I see why you like her”

“Told you, but you always said Steve's kid had to have become something like him.” Wayne scoffs at him and I look at him amused

“Something like Steve? What exactly does that mean? I cook like him and I'm stubborn like him. Is that what you mean or do we need to have a long discussion about what you and dad were really up to back in the days?” I say and Eddie blushes

“Nope, we do not need that... But yeah I can tell the stubbornness... and I must say I think you have the caring nurturing side from him as well. He always did care a lot about the kids in the gang back then. We didn't hang out before the...thing... we didn't even like each other, to different y'know”

I laugh “Yeah Basketball and girls versus DnD and drug dealing. I'd say that's opposites yeah. Dad said pretty much the same when I asked him about what you were like before ...then” I say ending in a hushed tone as I can see Eddie flinch a bit at my words.

“Yeah, you probably should have asked this one” pointing at Wayne “ or Dustin or Mike if you wanted those stories” he smiles

“This one hoped you'd home back an tell her your self” Wayne smiles at him from the bed taking his hand

“As for Dustin and Mike... well that was impossible. One wouldn't stop crying when trying to talk about you and the other just flat out refused to acknowledge you ever existed” I say and I feel sad for Dustin for all the times I tried asking about Eddie. “Wayne has told me some amusing anecdotes of course but I would have liked to hear some of the more naughty stories too” I wink at him and smile

“No, noooo you would not” he laughs “no need to tell you anything of the sort. Besides I was never naughty...I was an angel” the man in the bed starts coughing so badly I think he's dying.

“Wayne...? WAYNE! You ok?” I feel panicked and I reach for the alarm when he shakes his head and I see he's smiling, he finally manages to stop coughing, draws a deep breath, and turns to Eddie and says

“You were a WHAT you said? Why you lying to her?”

“What?! I was a good kid...”

“Oh...yeah right you were... you want me to tell other kind of stories about you there Edward Munson?” Wayne looks mischievous and smirks at Eddie

“No... Ok so maybe I had a wild side... Don't listen to him...he's old and delusional” he scoffs but I see him smiling lovingly at the man in the bed.

“Now, now behave. I believe you were a good kid with a naughty side Eddie, just like the rest of us” I say and I look at Wayne who's laughing

“Yeah this one wasn't an angel all the time either Eddie, I tell ya”

“Oh really? Well we'll have a story time then when you get back home. I wanna hear all about it” Eddie says and looks at me with a devilish smile

I just shake my head, of course Wayne had to bring up my teen years when I would do absolutely everything dad told me not to do then get in trouble and call Wayne to help me so dad wouldn't find out. We sit and talk a while with Wayne who's looking better by the minute. I feel such relief. Then I look down at my watch and I gasp

“Shit! Oh sorry but is that the time, I'm sorry but I have to bury Eddie under a load of blankets again and take him home. I need to be home for dinner in like 30 minutes.” I say as I kiss Wayne on the forehead and promise to come back the next day.

We head out to the car and I once again pull blankets over Eddies body and drive back to the trailer park. Once there Eddie gets out and does a big stretch, his shirt rides up his stomach revealing the amazing v tracing down into his pants. I sigh and can't take my eyes off him. He sees me and he chuckles

“Well thank you babe, I like that look. But you need to leave now so you can come back later. Wouldn't want to keep Steve waiting.” he smiles that amazing smile at me sending shivers down my spine.

“I'll hold you to that tied up in bed thing Eddie” I give him a promising smile and get back in the car. I see his cheeks turn pink and his eyes dark. Then he lifts his shirt up revealing his muscular abdomen, I sigh and feel myself get wet. Fucking man! I start the car and drive back home, I get there just on time.

“Hello, I'm home” I call out as I enter

“Hey honey, we didn't think you'd make it. I'll get you a plate” dad calls back as I take off my shoes and jacket and go in to the dining room. There I get a surprise

“Jonathan! Will! Oh my god HI!” I run up to them and give them both a big hug “When did you get here?”

“Nancy picked us up while Steve was visiting Wayne at the hospital. How is he doing?” Jonathan says

“Errands huh?” I say and smile at dad “Well, he seems to feel better by the minute. I guess getting rid of the fever was the first step. He's apparently had it for a few weeks, being a stubborn ass not wanting to 'bother' anyone about it” I snarl

“Seems he hasn't changed” Will laughs “still as stubborn as ever. But how are you doing love? I know you care deeply for him”

“I feel better now that I can see that the deterioration in his health these past weeks has been a lot to do with the fever and not the cancer in it self. The doctor said it was stable at the moment, no major changes” I say

We all sit down to eat, I'm so happy they're here. I like them both a lot, I almost slip and tell them Eddie will be so happy to see them but I bite my tongue last minute. I look over at dad and he nods and mouths “Me too” at me I smile. Good I'm not the only one having problems keeping that a secret at least. We talk for a couple of hours but then I start to feel like I want to get going. I get up and say

“Well I'm sorry but I promised a friend I was going to come over tonight. I'm just going to hit the shower and change, I smell like a hospital” I make a face at them and they laugh

“Who are you going to see?” dad asks, I know he hopes to hear a guy's name one of these days

“Macy, she has some problems so I'm going to be the good listener for the night, might stay over. But you guys have a great evening and I'll see you tomorrow. I guess you're meeting up with the guys?” I ask Will and he smiles

“Yeah, haven't told any of them I'm back. Thought I'd surprise them” he says

“I can drive you to Mikes. I guess we're starting there” I say

“Thanks love, yeah I thought so. Guess he'll call in the others. See you tomorrow Hailey, and you have a good night too” I hug him and Jonathan and I go upstairs to take a quick shower and change. I opt for a long dress, conveniently “forgetting” to put on underwear. I smile to myself and feel the heavy feeling down below as well as a familiar wetness. God I can't get enough of that man... I blush thinking about the people downstairs and what they'd say if they knew where I was really going. I go back downstairs, say good bye and head out to my car. I think I broke quite a few speeding limits getting out to the trailer park. As I park the car I see a familiar silhouette sitting at the table outside the trailer. I get out of the car and walk up to him swaying my hips just an extra little bit.

“Well don't you look good enough to eat... and make no mistake I will be eating you until you scream my name princess” I hear a husky voice from the shadows. I gasp and feel my juices quite literally starting to drip down my inner thighs.

“Oh...” my brain has shut down I can't find any words to express all the feelings rushing through me at the moment. Eddie chuckles

“Cat got your tongue there babe? Or you too horny to speak now?” he grabs me and pulls me close so I end up standing between his legs. He runs his hands up under my dress, up my legs and grabs my ass. “oh la la no panties I do believe someone is very eager tonight. I better finish this cigarette and get you inside before the neighbors call the cops on us for indecent exposure” he chuckles and slides one hand in between my thighs “oh fuck you're wet babe” he growls and I feel weak to the knees. I need to fucking sit down or I might pass out, he's good!

I lean down and I kiss him deeply, biting his bottom lip as I pull away. His intense eyes stare in to mine and I moan just from his look alone.

“Fuck Eddie, what are you doing to me” I whisper

“Oh I'm doing almost nothing now, you just wait until we get inside” he smiles at me and I moan again “Good girl, I like to hear you moan for me” he says with a deep voice and I feel a shiver going through my entire body.

“Hey Ed... I might need a moment... I think I need to sit down” I blush and he purrs at me

“Hell no, if you can't walk I'll just carry you. I need you inside like this fucking instant” he swoops me up into his arms and carries me in the trailer. He continues in to the bedroom with me still in his arms. He sets me down on the bed and towers over me with a seductive smile playing in the corners of his mouth. “Now... were you really serious about me tying you to the bed and having my way with you babe?” he looks down at me and I think I might pass out. All I can do is nod and stare at him, he's so incredibly hot my mind is having issues dealing with this

“Words sweetheart, I need words here... You know I'm a sucker for your voice” he mumbles and lets one hand grip my jaw tilting it up making me look him straight in the eyes. I gulp and take a deep breath

“Yes, I think I would like that very much” I manage to get out

“You think? Never tried before?” he smiles

“No, never. All vanilla here Ed” I whisper

“Oh no babe, you're not just vanilla. Didn't you come here wearing nothing but that dress all wet and ready for me? That points to some adventurous spirit in there. And I'll love to find out what it is that'll do it for you babe. If you'll have me around for that long” he smiles at me

“What? You mean like longer than forever? Because I mean that's how long I was planning on keeping you” I blush again and I look up at him, he's just staring at me

“Forever? Sounds like just the right amount of time” he leans down and plants a soft kiss om my lips making me gasp. “Now, would you please lie back so I can start having my way “ he growls “I've waited too long already”

I scooch back on the bed laying down and watching him as he turns around and starts picking something out of the dresser. He sets whatever it was down on the top of the dresser and then he tugs his shirt out of his jeans and pulls it over his head. Now only wearing a pair of VERY fitted ripped jeans low on his hips he turns to me again. In his hand I see four different ties. Four?! Oh...my...god I'm really going to be tied to the bed hands and feet. I start to squirm where I'm laying on the bed being watched by those intensely brown eyes. I move my hands down on my body and he tuts at me

“No, no sweetheart. No touching... that's all my job tonight.” he gives me a smile that I can literally FEEL in my pussy.

“Oh, ok sorry” I say quietly

“No need to be sorry that I make you want to touch yourself, I just really want to do it” he coos at me and I smile

“Then touch me Eddie...please” he draws a deep breath, closes his eyes and when he opens them again his eyes are black with arousal

“First we need to remove this” he takes a hold of the hem on my dress “ I like it but I will ruin it with stains if I keep it on you” he groans softly “May I?” I nod then I remember

“Yes, you may” I say and I hear him chuckle quietly

“Good girl” he purrs. He straddles me, one knee on either side of my hips and he slowly start to unbutton my dress... Opening a couple of buttons then bending down to kiss the skin freed. He does this all the way down my dress. As he opens the last buttons, conveniently placed right over my crotch he pauses and looks at me “Imma need you to sit up now and remove the dress” I feel a bit disappointed he didn't kiss the last bit as well, but as I sit up and pull the dress down from my arms I see his idea clearly. He's kneeling right in front of me, at the perfect height. He slowly unzips his jeans and pulls them down on his hips. His cock springs forward and I moan

“Well... you can say hello” he winks at me and I look up at him

“Please” I open my mouth and I deliberately sit on my hands, making sure he understands I have no intention of touching

“Ooooh, you're good babe” he takes his cock and gives it a few long strokes in front of me making me drool a little. He smiles and places the tip on my tongue “Taste me love, please” I close my mouth and let my tongue play on the tip licking up the drops of pre-cum. I suck him in as far as I can in one go making him groan coarsely “fuuuuck Hailey...that damn mouth”

I'm not a fan of rough blow jobs. I hate gagging, I can go very deep if I set the pace, I feel his hands on the sides of my head and he nestles his fingers in my hair. But he doesn't push for me to go faster or deeper, he let's me be in charge of this. Is he real?

“C'mon babe, suck me, please your mouth is SO fucking amazing” I suck with long slow strokes as his hands hold on to my hair. I slobber on him making him slide with ease in and out of my mouth.

Suddenly he pulls out and I can't help a  disappointed “Awww” slipping out between my lips. Eddie smiles at me, he leans down and kisses me

“Babe, as amazing as that was I have other plans for my cum tonight” he winks at me and kisses me again. “Now lets move this dress to the side and get going tying you up and making you scream my name” he takes the dress and tosses it on the floor. He motions me to lie down on the bed. As I do he looks at me “Ok, so you're sure? I'll tie each of your hands and feet to the bedposts. Let me know if it feels too tight ok.”

“Ok” I can't seem to form any other words

“Sweetheart... ARE. YOU. SURE? Don't want you panicking and hurting yourself”

“I'm sure Eddie. Begin with my hands and ask me again” I say and he nods like he thinks that's a good idea. He takes one of the ties and leans over taking my right hand and placing it up against the bedpost. He makes a knot, then tugs at it making sure I'm restrained. He does the same on my left side.

“Ok, so this feels?” I can hear the expectation on his voice

I tug a bit on the ties, I really am stuck to the bed. At first a small ball of anxiety forms in my stomach. But then I see a flash of me writhing on the bed with Eddie doing all sorts of things to me and I can't move. That idea sends electric bolts through me and I feel how insanely wet I become from that idea. As I've been deciding how this feels I've had my eyes shut, I open them and stare at Eddie

“Wow, ok I'd say you like this... am I right? Your eyes are fucking burning at me babe”

“Keep going, and don't fucking stop touching me until I scream” I say and I hardly recognize my own voice. I am so turned on right now

“Fuuuuck... I promise babe. I will do my best to make you go insane before I fuck your brains out” he growls at me as he descends the bed and start tying up my legs in the same fashion as my hands. When he's done he looks at me “Ok one more check, you still ok?”

“Eddie... I need you to touch me now”

“My pleasure babe, I mean for me I could just stand here and look at you while stroking my cock and I'd come like crazy. But this isn't about me is it.” he gives me that devilish smile that sends flutters all through my body “I'm not leaving, I'm just getting something from my bag out in the living room. I'll be right back” he says and hurries off. He's back within seconds. He comes up to the bed and leans over me “Do you mind one more thing?” he purrs and holds up a mask, one of those you wear to sleep. I gasp

“Ooooh... I think so, lets try Ed” I say. He slides the mask over my head and places it over my eyes. Instantly I feel more aroused, I think it has to do with not knowing what he's up to.

“Now, if anything feels like it's too much babe you stop me ok?  If you want to stop just say watermelon ok?”

“Watermelon?” I say

“Yes, watermelon.” I can hear him smile

“Ok, Ed...but please can you touch me I'm going insane here” I squirm against the sheets

I hear him move, then I feel the weight of him landing on the bed. He straddles me again and leans down over me giving me a passionate kiss. His lips move from my mouth to the side of my head kissing me right below the ear, trailing kisses down my neck making me moan. He nibbles at the skin on my neck, letting his tongue play along my jaw. I am hyper aware of every touch, and of his cock twitching against my belly. He continues kissing me down my collarbones stopping right before hitting my boobs. I can feel him sitting down on my hips, his cock heavy on my belly

“This ok babe, I'm not to heavy am I?”

“No Ed...perfect” I whimper now every touch is just so... soft and teasing. I'm losing my mind here.

“Good, see I wanna try some more stuff on you right now. I think you'll like it” he says in a deep rumbling voice and I let out a long moan making him chuckle “good girl, loud already and I'm just getting started” I feel him shift his weight, probably reaching for something. He leans over again, kissing my boobs, sucking in my nipple hard in his mouth, playing with his tongue around it. Then he moves to the other boob, same thing but his hand is pinching my nipple on the other side. I squirm, God this feels good, I feel my pussy throbbing and I'm pretty sure I've already left a wet spot in the bed. Then he sits up and I feel something soft brushing against my skin, I gasp. What is that? This whole new sensation on my skin, feels like fur...or feathers?  He softly lets it play on my neck, down towards my boobs. He plays with the soft, whatever it is, around my boobs making me squirm even more.

“Oh you like that? Doe's it feel good on your amazing tits?” he murmurs

“Yeeesss Ed, yes... I want...more” I pant and I hear him let out a low purr

He continues sliding the soft whatever on my boobs then he starts moving it down my belly. I hear him draw breath as it probably touches not only me but also his cock. He moves stands up on his knees shifting position, so he sits between my restrained legs. I can feel him reach for a pillow and he puts that under my ass lifting my whole pelvic area from the mattress. He starts kissing me from my bellybutton and down over my hips, softly sliding his tongue over my mound then moving away and beginning to kiss my legs. I want to scream at him to just fucking eat me, but I want this to keep going as well. I squirm and moan with every soft touch now. The soft whatever is now playing on my mound and on my inner thighs, this is insane it feels so good. Eddie keeps kissing me on my thighs as he lets whatever it is slightly just brush over my pussy, I let out a small guttural scream.

“Ooooh babe, you like that? Feeling the feathers brush your folds?” so they're feathers... well I wouldn't care if it was the whole fucking bird it feels amazing. I can feel him putting the feathers away, grabbing the soft flesh of my inner thighs more firmly now. He trails kisses up towards my pussy, nibbling at the skin. Then I hear him fiddle with something and he says, with a voice that sounds really weird “you ready babe?” his fingers now softly playing on the outside of my pussy

“Yes, Ed...oh fuck yes... touch me” I squirm

I feel his fingers enter my folds “God so wet...good girl” he groans and he slides his fingers up and down spreading my juices all over my cunt. Then he leans in and I feel his tongue finally touching me, but it feels so strange. Then I can feel him smile against my pussy. I hear a low click and I fucking scream with pleasure. He's got a tongue vibrator, I've seen pictures and read reviews but never thought I'd get to experience one. The feeling is beyond amazing as he works my clit with a vibrating tongue, his fingers digging in to my thighs. I scream and writhe under him now, this is almost to much pleasure at once. I want to grab his hair, and I try to move. Yeah right I can't that just makes the pleasure even more intense, I am totally in Eddies mercy now. He licks me and sucks my clit all the while his mouth and tongue is vibrating on me. I feel his hand sliding up my ass and two fingers enter me. I might actually black out, If someone saw me now I bet they'd think I was doing a great impression of Linda Blair in the Exorcist... Eddie is slowly fucking me with his fingers, then he picks up the pace and starts scissoring my insides. I feel the tension in my body growing, I moan, I scream, I pant.

“I'm gonna come Ed...please I'm gonna....fuuuuuuck EDDIEEEEE!!!!” I scream out my orgasm feeling that explosion again and the insane wetness gushing out of me. He growls a low deep growl as I feel him standing up on his knees, grabbing my hips and plunge his rock hard cock in me. I scream again, he fills me up so good. He fuck me with a frenzy I've never ever felt before. Tightly gripping my boobs and fucking me like there's no tomorrow.  

“Fuuuuuck here it comes... Hailey fuuuuck” I feel his cock throbbing as he releases inside of me with a guttural scream, I feel squirt after squirt filling me up with his hot cum. He slumps over on my chest panting. “Jesus fucking Christ babe” He kisses me deeply then he removes the mask and then starts to untie my arms and legs. I stretch and then I wrap my arms around him and hold him tight

“Thank you Eddie, that was beyond amazing” I purr “next time I get to tie you down, deal?”

I can hear him laugh a soft growling laugh

“Oh I'd fucking love to put my body in your hands like this”

We lie there talking and cuddling for an hour or so, I can hear Eddie's voice getting sleepy and his breathing calm and relaxed. He drifts off to sleep and I just watch him. He's beautiful, like no man I've ever seen before. I put my head on his chest and listen to his heart beating as I too fall asleep.

I don't know how long we've been asleep but I'm suddenly jerked awake by Eddies muffled screams again, like the first night he's sweating and squirming. Obviously trying so hard to get away from something. I wrap my arms tightly around him and press him close

“Eddie... I'm here you're safe. Whatever it is isn't going to get you. Eddie...babe” I hum and rock him as he slowly calms down in my arms. He flinches and his eyes shoot open, full of panic. He's panting like he's been running. He looks around and then without hesitation he begins to sob. Big heart wrenching sobs and he hides his face in my chest. I just hug him, stroking his hair and I keep quiet. He doesn't need me to talk he needs me to be near. I keep stroking his hair and hum to him until the sobs stop and I feel him relax and I can tell by his breathing he's fallen back asleep. I wiggle down so his head id resting on my neck and I kiss his forehead and drift off to sleep myself. The rest of the night is peaceful, no more nightmares. We wake up almost at the same time, sun is high in the sky so it must be late in the morning. The phone is ringing. I crawl out of bed and answer it thinking it must be the hospital

“Hello, Munson residence this is Hailey”

“Hailey?”

“Oh, hi dad...”

“What... are you doing there? Weren't you supposed to be at Macy's?” I can hear my dad sounding very confused I look at the time 10:15

“Yeah I just got here, thought I'd stop by before coming home to see if there was any news on Wayne”

“Oh ok, so nothing new?” dad asks

“No, Eddie hasn't heard anything yet. I suppose you wanted to talk to him? He's out for a smoke I'll get him” I say feeling this panic giggle bursting out as I lay the receiver down on the table and hurry back to the bedroom

“Hey babe, come back” Eddie reaches for me with a husky very sexy morning voice

“I'd love to but... DAD is on the phone and I answered it... He's obviously looking for you”

Eddie chuckles “Oh my god babe, I could tell something was up you were giggling just a little to frantically. Wait here and I'll talk to him for a bit. Then I need to thank you properly” he gets out of bed, butt naked and sexy as fuck, kisses me softly and goes out to get the phone

“Hey big boy, what's up? Yeah, no she didn't wake me up...no worries.”

They talk for a bit something is arranged and then I hear him put the phone down and steps coming back to me.

“We're going fishing today. Nancy is spending the day at Jonathan's so your dad thought it was a perfect time for me to get out some. Yeah and you shouldn't be bothering me like this, I can call you if I have news I don't need you running around here” he chuckles and crawls in to bed and lies down on top of me “Let me show you how you can bother me more babe” he kisses me hungrily and his hands start trailing up my thighs

“Eddieee” I squeal “I need a shower, but you're welcome to join me”

“Oh you just try and stop me following that perfect ass to the end of the world” he says and kisses me again, gets up and holds out his hand for me to take. He wraps his arms around me from behind and we walk like that in to the shower. I can't help but grind against Eddie as we're standing in the shower letting the water soak us. “oh you're killing me here babe, I soooo wanna bend you over and fuck you right here but I'm sorry there just isn't time. Steve's picking me up in 45 minutes and I think you need to leave before that, I can't think of a good explanation as to why we both have wet hair...can you?” he mumbles in my ear

“Oh...damn... Well no I can't think of anything either. Rain check on the shower sex then?” I poke my ass out and rub it against him one more time He grabs it and squeezes it hard

“GOD yes! Tonight?” he keeps fondling my ass kissing my neck. Yeah this is going great, leaving each other alone right now.

“Ed, if you don't want my dad to walk in on us you need to let go of my ass and step back. Or even get out of the shower or so help me God I will pin you to that wall and suck you dry” I say and I hear a moan

“Fuck, yeah you're right. As much as I want that...” he lets go of me and he steps out of the shower. I quickly wash of then I get out and let Eddie have the shower to himself.

“Babe, I'm going to leave before dad gets here. But call my cell when you get home. I hope I can get away for a quickie at least. And call if there's any news on Wayne ok?!” I pop my head in the shower and get a kiss from him

“Of course, on both. I'll call, have good day sweetheart. Don't go thinking of me too much now, you might get so frustrated you kill me with your eagerness” he smiles at me “I still want to thank you properly later...” the look in his eyes is suddenly very serious

“Thank me?” I don't get it

“Later, it's not really a naked in the shower thing” he smiles at me and I nod. Still not entirely sure what he means. I get dressed and I leave, as I get in the car my phone rings. It's Will telling me he decided to take a walk over to Mikes so I didn't have to give him a ride. I take the back road from the trailer park so I won't meet dad somewhere along the ride. I've supposedly left like at least 30 minutes ago. I decide that if Nancy isn't home, and I don't feel like being alone I might as well go see Robin and then later on take a trip to see Wayne. As I get to Robins apartment I hear loud music which is a bit weird seeing as Robin has a bit of a problem with loud sounds. Something about “that year”

I knock on the door... no answer. I knock again harder this time, the music is lowered

“Hello? Someone at the door?” I hear

“Yeah Rob, it's me. You busy, should I come back?” I hear footsteps and she flings the door open smiling at me

“Stranger! Hey, no I'm just... well I found this new workout thing... It's called Zumba. You exercise with dance... I need the music loud or I can't concentrate because the guy on the DVD... his voice is so annoying” she laughs... oh good another 1 day hobby

“Zumba Robin? Isn't that a bit expensive I've been told? And why would you need to do this you're already fit?” I say and I hug her and go inside

“Nah, the 40 something mom bod is quickly approaching... I need to stay looking flawless for the ladies” she laughs “All those ladies you see hanging around here waiting their turn...”

“Robin we've talked about this, to actually have ladies falling for you, you need to leave the apartment once in a while” I say and smile at her

“Yeah, yeah I know” she sighs then she lightens up “speaking of falling, someone is looking very happy... the dude?”

“Oh “ I blush “yeah we've hung out...you know” I giggle and Robin lets out a squeal

“OH MY GOD! Couch right now I need details!” she drags me along and flops down on the couch

“Well... I mean I like him A LOT Rob, he's so pretty and so sexy and so nice to me. Yeah he's older but I mean I can't really tell, it's like we're the same age but like we met in the middle? He's one of the good ones Rob, I'm so happy”

He giggles and leans over and gives me a big hug “I'm so freaking happy for you Hailey, SO freaking happy! I knew you'd find your person sometime, never believed this 'something wrong with me' bullshit” she smiles so widely at me I feel a little tug at the heartstrings when I realize that I have to tell her, after Saturday and the big surprise I HAVE to tell her because I will need her when telling dad.

“I'm glad you're on board, I'm going to need you when I tell dad... I don't this it will be taken with joy at first” Robin looks at me

“You know I think you underestimate the love Steve has for you... He's just going to be happy that you're finally happy sweetie” she pets my hand and I smile at her, hoping I look natural.

“Thanks Rob, but you know I've never thought about what dads opinion on age gaps are... What if he's totally against it, thinking it's sick?”

“I'll just remind him of that 45 year old he banged for a couple of moths when we worked at Scoops...” she says and raises an eyebrow

“THE WHAT!? You're kidding? But weren't you like 18 that year?” I say feeling the laughter bubble up inside

“Yup, we sure were... That didn't stop Stevie-boy though” she giggles and I flat out break down screaming with laughter

“Ok so that's probably more than I EVER needed to know about dad, but still totally priceless!” we talk some more about this and that before I tell her I'm going to go see Wayne and then head home to prepare dinner. “Oh and it's on with the 80's theme, Nancy loved the idea” I tell her and she claps her hand and giggle

“Awesome! Scoops Ahoy it is! YAY!” she calls out and I laugh at her, hug her and leave. I get in the car and head for the hospital. I get there at 3 so I think I might stay like a couple of hours. I get up to Wayne's room expecting to see him in bed like always, but no Wayne. I panic and I think he's died an no one told me. I run out to the nurses station and no one's there then I hear a familiar laugh in the visitor's lounge. I head over there and there is Wayne, laughing and looking as good as ever. He has visitors. I smile and I wave at him

“Hailey sweetheart! How good to see you, look at this old bag 'o bones... not looking too bad today right?” he's all smiles and I feel so warm inside

“No Wayne you're looking like a whole new person. I'm so glad! But I see you have company” I nod and smile at the three men I know he used to work with at the factory “I'll come back tomorrow and see if I can take you home” I say and I go up to him and give him a hug

“I think the doctor wanted to talk to you about that” he says “I believe he's still around here somewhere”

“Ok I'll go see if I can find him then, see you tomorrow sweetie” I squeeze his hand and I go back and try to see of I can find the doctor. I see him through one of the doors to a patients room so I wait outside for him. He comes out in about 10 minutes and I call out for him

“Excuse me Dr. Wells?”

He turn to me “Yes

“Hello, I'm Hailey Harrington, we've spoken of the phone about Wayne Munson. He said you wanted to talk to me?”

“Oh hello Ms. Harrington. Yes, follow me” he points at an open door into an office, I go in and I sit at the desk “Yes, well Mr. Munson is feeling a lot better as you can tell. His fever is gone and also it seems the latest rounds of chemotherapy we put him through last month has had some effect. The growth of the tumors have slowed down, the ones on his lungs are still there but they've shrunk in size. The one on his kidney is operable but he doesn't want to be put under when he's still going to wake up sick as he puts it. But it's the one in his abdomen that's the real good news. It's almost gone. I would label it a medical miracle or maybe just that we switched the sort of chemo we gave him. He's responded very very well to this treatment. But of course the cancer is still there but he's been given more time.” I try to comprehend what he's saying to me...

“Wayne is going to feel better? And I get to keep him longer?” I can feel the tears and that lump in my chest growing

“He will have a very much improved life now. I am glad that we got to do such extensive blood work and scans on him this time, he's never been much for staying other times. So this fever was probably a good thing dressed in a devil's suit” the doctor smiles at me “with that said he can go home today if he wants to, I see no need for him to stay. As long as you can get him here in 3 months for check-ups.”

“Today? I can take him home now you mean?” I'm crying now, the doctor hands me a box of tissues

“Yes, I haven't told him yet. I thought you's want the honors” he smiles at me

“I have to fix some things at his home, like go grocery shopping for him and make the bed and stuff. Can I pick him up around 6?” fucking hell I need to go over there and strip that bed from mine and Eddies adventures

“Yes of course, should I tell him or?”

“No, no I want to surprise him later. He thinks I left now anyways so” I say and we shake hands and I leave feeling so happy for Wayne but a bit sad for me, the nights with Eddie are now over. We can not do THAT with Wayne back in the trailer.

I leave the hospital and go pick up some stuff I know Wayne likes to have in the fridge. Then I head back to the trailer, I run inside and I put all the grocery's away and I go to the bedroom. I smile when I look at the bed, forget Disneyland! This where the real magic happens, I giggle to myself before pulling the sheets off the bed and throwing them in the washing machine dad helped Wayne install a couple of years ago. I change the rest of the bedding and put new sheets on. I look around and I pick up every single little clue that anything has happened in here besides sleeping.

The vibrator and a feather duster is lying beside the bed, so that's what that was I smile thinking back to the night before. I pick them up and I remember Eddie saying he had to get them from his bag so I go out into the living room and I open his bag to put them back. I see a small photo album in there. I know I shouldn't but Eddie isn't coming back any time soon so I take it out and I sit down on the couch. I open it. On the first page I see a very pretty girl, blonde with an amazing smile. I think I recognize her from dads yearbook. Someone, most likely Eddie, had written “I'm so sorry Chrissy” under the photo. So this was the girl they blamed Eddie for killing? I feel a tear falling down my cheek. I turn the page, there's Wayne when he was younger with a very cute couple holding a baby. “Mum, dad and uncle W -67” so this was Eddies parents? And baby Eddie, I smile, he was sooo cute. Next page, older Eddie and his dad all dressed in black. Oh, this must have been at Eddies mum's funeral. I wipe away another tear. I turn another page,I see the Hellfire logo drawn on a piece of paper. The following three pages are pictures of Hellfire Club during the years it existed. The last picture of the bunch is the one from dads yearbook, 1986 when Dustin and Mike joined. There are like 4 pages left I turn and there's dad, smiling at the camera along with Robin flipping the camera off, I smile always with the attitude. Nancy and Dustin smiling at the photographer. Will and Jonathan sitting on a bench talking to Mike and El. Max and Lucas is the last picture, they're sitting there looking at each other seemingly oblivious to the photo being taken. I knew they were a thing back then, now they are friendly but reserved with each other. I'm just about to close the album when I see the corner of one more photo tucked in to the lining of the album. I pull it out and I gasp and I drop the album. There on a gurney I see Eddie, pale as a ghost with dried blood all over and these vicious looking wounds all over his upper body, the scars I think, he looks dead but I mean I know he isn't. The environment surrounding him doesn't look real, it's all dark, twisted and ...sickly. I cry, I cry so bad. Is it really all true? Did he have to survive in THAT for months with those wounds. No wonder he has nightmares. I take one more look at the horrific photo and then I put it back and close the album and put that back in the bad and close it. I hide my face in my hands and I sob for o while. I feel awful not believing dad, but I mean... who would have it just sounds so much like a part of some wicked horror story. I need to get a grip! I'm picking up Wayne soon and I can't look like I've been crying my heart out or he'll start asking questions. I go to the bathroom and I splash my face with cold water. I look in the mirror, yeah ok it'll do.

As I'm about to leave I remember one thing I thought I needed to do. I write a note to Eddie

“Hey Ed, picking up Wayne today. In case you're back before we are. The things are back in your bag. We'll talk later -Hailey”

I get in the car and I head over to the hospital again, Wayne is very happy to see me but a bit confused

“But you've visited me once today. You needn't come this much think about the cost of gas sweetie”

“Well Wayne, this isn't a visit. I was promised I could take you home if I came back now” I smile at him when I see what I said sinking in.

“I can go home? For real the doctor said that?” I see tears falling from his eyes.

“Yeah so get your things now mister and lets get you back home.” I hug him and he hurries to get what few things I had brought over for him.

“Ok as ready as I'll ever be!” he looks like a kid on Christmas morning all giddy. We head out to the car and drive back to the trailer park. He sighs deeply when he sees his home. “That's a sight for sore eyes Hailey. I hate hospitals” he scoffs and I giggle at him

“I know you do Wayne, but wasn't it kinda worth it this time? You got better news than you have in months?” I say and I hold his hand

“Yeah, that's true. Can't wait to tell Eddie” he smiles, then I see his smile die “oh...but now I'm better he don't have to be here no more” he looks so sad

“Don't worry Wayne, I talked to Eddie I think he's planning on staying around for a while” he looks up at me with a hopeful smile

“Really? Oh I would love that” we get out of the car and head inside. Wayne plops down on the couch sighing deeply “This right here is heaven!”

I laugh and I put his bag in the bedroom. I go back in to the kitchen I see the note hasn't been touched so they're not back yet. I put the note in my pocket “So you want something to eat Wayne?”

“Nah they do feed you pretty good at the hospital, the only good thing. Yeah and the nurses are pretty” he chuckles

“Ok, so you're ok? What about a cup of tea then?” I ask

“That sounds great sweetheart. But where's Eddie?” he looks around

“Oh him and dad went fishing, I guess that's the only thing dad could think of where no one would see them” I say and Wayne looks stunned

“Edward Munson fishing? I'll be damned” he laughs. I make us some tea and I sit down on the couch with him. We talk about the news the doctors gave him, how I'm doing, how stressed Nancy is about the party etc. It's been dark for quite some time when we see the headlights of a car outside.  We hear dad and Eddie talking and we hear

“Huh,is Hailey here again? Oh fuck did something happen to Wayne” we hear running, we smile at each other. The door bursts open and Eddie comes in, he stops dead in his tracks just staring at us. “Oh... hey” I think he's to surprised to speak, dad comes in after him and he also looks just as surprised.

“Hey Wayne, Hailey?” dad says

“Well hey there boys, you get any fish or did this loser scare them all off not keeping quiet?” Wayne chuckles and looks at Eddie who's still on shock

“Haha yeah, no we got a few small ones. Nothing to keep so we threw them back. But we had a good time, didn't we Ed” dad pokes Eddie in the side making him flinch

“Yeah, sorry. Yeah good time no fish... You're home? How are you feeling?” he goes up to the couch and hugs the man he lived almost his entire life with. Wayne looks surprised at first but then he hugs him back patting him on the back.

“Well I feel just fine son, I'll tell you all the good news later. But now I would like to hear what the hell Steve promised you to get you to go fishing? His firstborn?” he looks at me and winks, I blush

Eddie clears his throat “Nah nothing that dramatic, he just wanted to get me out of here for a while. I mean...fishing isn't my thing no but the fresh air and nature was nice” he says and sneaks a glance at me.

“Oh Eddie, don't for a second believe that dad is some kind of fisherman either I can count on one hand the times he's voluntarily gone fishing in the past.” I say and dad scowls at me

“Hey don't ruin my bad ass fisherman vibe here!” he chuckles and both Wayne and Eddie laugh at him

“Good, so not just me then scaring the fish away” Eddie pats dad on the back. I get up from the couch and I hug Wayne.

“Ok you take care now, call me of you need anything. Same goes for you Eddie” I say and smile at him “I went shopping so there's food in the fridge. And I put fresh bedding in your bed for you Wayne” I say and I glance over at Eddie quickly. He's looking down at his feet, but I can see a smile on his lips

“Thank you sweetheart, you're truly the best. You did good here Steve” Wayne takes my dads hand and squeezes it.

“Yeah thanks Hailey, what do we owe you for the food?” Eddie looks at me

“I'll have to check the receipt later I think I have in my car. Can I call when I get home and let you know?” I say

“Works out, talk to you later then. And Steve man, this was fun!” he hugs my dad and then he takes my hand to shake it. But I feel his thumbs caressing the side of my hand and his eyes burn at me.

“Ok Hailey let's these two to talk and get home. Nancy should be back by now” dad and I leave and I can't help but think about that comment from Wayne “His firstborn?” does he suspect something? Or was that just a coincidence him saying that. We get home and Nancy has just finished dinner.

“Yeah I thought you guys might be back soon. I came home about an hour ago. Where have you been?”

“I went to see Robin then to the hospital to visit Wayne, they told me he could go home tonight so I went shopping for him and cleaned up a bit in his trailer. Then I went and got him, stayed a while and talked with him” I say and Nancy smiles

“Oh what a relief he's home, is he feeling better now?” she asks

“Yeah much better” I proceed to tell them all about the great news the doctors told me and they're both very happy to hear that he's doing so well on the new treatment.

“What about you? Work run late again?” Nancy turns to dad

“Yeah, we have this new supplier that I'm thinking I have to let go. They're never on time and someone has to stay back and wait for them. Then there's the paperwork that follows. Me and Hailey timed it perfectly though” he chuckles “how about you love, how's Joyce and Hopper doing?”

“Oh just fine, they send their love. Joyce is SO pleased to have her boys home when it's not a holiday” she smiles

“I bet” dad says and we sit down to dinner. We talk some more about Wayne's good news and how the Byers are doing. Then I get up I clear the table and I go back into the kitchen. Dad comes in and whispers “Don't forget to call Eddie” I nod at him.

“I'll do it in my room so Nancy won't hear me” I whisper back and he agrees. I finish cleaning up after dinner and then I head up to my bedroom. I take the phone and I dial Wayne's number

“Hello?”

“Hey Ed” I say

“Oh hello Hailey, thanks for calling” oh so Wayne is right there with him

“I just wanted to let you know that the food is on me, but if you really want to repay me you can start by using that vibrator thing next time as well. That thing was amazing... hell I think I wanna use it when going down on you” I purr into the phone

“Ehm... ok I'll see to it that that's arranged. Maybe we can meet up tomorrow? I need to start getting out, I felt that today the fresh air did me good.” I can hear his voice is strained

“Yeah, I'd love to. I can pick you up at 11 and take you somewhere secluded for that fresh air?” I say

“Ok, sounds like a plan. See you at 11” I hear a noise in the background and a door closing “you're such a tease babe, God the things I wanna do to you right now” he growls at me

“Wayne leave the room?” I giggle

“Look I'll bring that vibrator if you bring that dirty mind of yours” he whispers

“Deal Munson” I say and I hang up

I go back down stairs and I watch some TV with dad and Nancy and we talk about what needs to be done for Saturday. Nancy fixes food and I get the decor, dad the drinks.

“I can go get the gift dad” I say and smile

“What gift? I thought the trip was the gift honey” Nancy blushes

“We wanted to spoil you a little extra for your big day, thank you Hailey that actually works out great. We'll talk about the details later” dad winks at me and smiles

“ Oh you two spoil me rotten as it is” she hits dad on the arm and smiles a warm smile at me

At around 11 I feel I'm almost asleep on the couch so I say good night and I go up stairs and get ready for bed. I crawl down between the covers and I fall asleep instantly. I woken up by a strange sound, like a clicking sound. I look around in the darkness. I almost scream out loud when I see a figure outside my window. But I recognize the outline, I turn on my bedside lamp. It's Eddie, outside my second story window. I get out of bed and hurry up to the window to open it

“Eddie? What the hell? It's like 2 am” I help him in he looks awful “did you walk here or something?”

“Ran...” he's panting heavily

“But... Eddie love... why?” I take him in my arms and I hold him

“This... because of this. I tried to sleep, but they came for me the second I closed my eyes. I need you to sleep Hailey... I need you” he whimpers and I see he's been crying

“Ok, ok... come on lets go to bed. I'll set an early alarm and you can hide while dad and Nancy get ready for work” I say, he nods looking more relaxed

We crawl in to bed and he lies down head against my chest like last time I helped him sleep after a nightmare. I stroke his hair and I hum to him like I did that time and before I know it he's sleeping. I lie there thinking that this grown, sexy, strong man needs me this much I must be doing something good for him not just... sexually. I fall asleep to holding Eddie tight. At 6 am my alarm wakes us and I hurry to shut it off before it wakes the others as well, I have no real reason being up this early.

Eddie looks up at me, kisses me softly and says

“Thank you Hailey...” there's a pause “I... love you too” he looks at me and I feel the tears burning in my eyes.

“What” I hear my voice breaking

“You told me you love me... Well... I love you too. I realized that running here last night because the dreams were so horrible and you weren't there to make them go away. I need you... and yeah I know it's been like what 4 days since we met. But what you told me? You meant that?” he asks

“I meant it, I do love you Ed. I meant it when I said I've loved you, or more the thought of you for years. I want to be able to help you with this Eddie, I want to be there for you. But we can't keep sneaking around like this. We need to come clean. I can't have you sneaking in here risking to get caught and I can't come sleep at yours any more seeing as Wayne's home again.” I kiss him

“I know, but can we wait til after the party. I don't want to ruin this for Steve he was so excited telling me all about it yesterday. Maybe I can get a room at the motel outside of town? You can come sleep with me, please” he looks at me, begging me

“Ok, when I pick you up today we can go there and see if they have any rooms available. But what are you going to tell Wayne?” I ask him

“He knows about the dreams, I'll just say they've been getting worse when I'm so close to the... place. He'll understand.” he wraps his arms around me and draws in a deep breath “I wanna get to smell your body every morning, kiss you and love you as much as I want to” he kisses my breast and up to my neck, tracing small kisses along my jawline then he kisses me for real and the intensity in his kiss takes my breath away.

“God Ed, I wish we could continue this like right now but I can hear dad stirring so it won't be long before he walks by here. We can't have him hearing us and checking in on me.” I kiss him back and press my body against his. I breath in his smell and I let out a soft moan.

“You sure? We can be quiet...soooo quiet” he whispers as I feel his hand finding it's way in between my thighs cupping my pussy “so very very quiet right” he purrs and lets one finger slide in between my folds. I gasp and bite my lip, no sounds, I nod at him

“So fucking quiet Ed” I whisper as my breathing gets heavier. He smiles at me and he presses his finger in to me while his thumb has found my clit circling it. I hide my head in the crease of his neck and I kiss him to keep from moaning, I bite down as the pleasure gets more intense

“Ouch you little vixen, trying to brand me for all to see” he snickers at me working one more finger into me.

“Ed, I need more... I need you in me now” I whisper at his shoulder and he purrs. He pulls his fingers out of me and he whispers to me to turn to the other side. I do as he tells me, he lifts my leg up and he slides in to me with that exquisite cock. Slow and steady he fucks me while whispering dirty little nothings in my ear making me go crazy. He can tell he's about to make me come, so he lets his fingers slide down my belly and start circling my clit.

“You better bite that pillow babe because I'm about to fuck you hard now so we came come together” he whispers in my ear. I grab the pillow and I put it up to my face, Eddie picks up the pace, he wasn't kidding he really was going to fuck me HARD. There is no way this isn't heard all over the house I think. I feel the orgasm hit and I bite down on the pillow but still letting out a long moan,I feel that he timed it perfectly. His cock throbbing in me releasing his seed in me. Now it's his turn to bite down on my neck with a deep grumbling groan as he comes. He lets go of my leg and grabs my boobs pulling me in close to him. Kissing my neck.

“That was amazing babe, and you were such a good girl keeping quiet like that” he whispers in my ear sending shiver down my spine. Then there's a knock on the door

“Hailey, you up I thought I heard a thump, you ok?”

“Yeah dad, just went to the toilet. Banged my foot” I'm ok, gonna try to get some more sleep”

“Ok, well... See you tonight then have a good day. Don't sleep to long”

“I won't I promised I'd visit Wayne today so I'll get up in like an hour, have a good day at work” I say hearing Eddie giggle behind me. I hear dad walking down stairs and we hear voices so I guess Nancy's already down there. I reach round and I grab Eddies hair and I pull it so his head comes real close to my neck, he groans “That was fucking mind blowing Ed, But I must say I'm not a fan of being quite... I love to scream your name” I tug some more at his hair and he moans in my ear

“I love when you scream my name also makes me feel like a million bucks”

“Good, you fucking feel like a million bucks Ed. I'd suggest sleeping some more but I wouldn't dare until they leave. So cuddle, then shower and then sleep a little more? “ I suggest to him and I hear him smiling

“I like the way you think” he lays on his back and I turn back towards him resting my head on his chest. His arm stroking my back and the other one playing in my hair. I kiss the scars on his chest and he shivers.

“Do they hurt still?” I ask letting my fingers softy touch them

“No, well only mentally.” he says in a hushed voice. We lie like this for a while not speaking just soft touches. Then I hear the front door open and close. I get out of bed and go out into the hallway.

“Dad? Nancy?” I call out, no answer, they've both left. I turn back and no Eddie on the bed... What the? Then I hear the shower, fast little fucker isn't he I think to myself and smile. I open the bathroom door and in the shower is Eddie waiting for me with a big grin

“No need to be quiet now right?” he eyes me up and down and motions with one finger for me to come to him. I step in to the shower and Eddie moves so I can stand in front of him. He turns my back to him “remember what I said I wanted to do to you last time we were in a shower together?” he purrs in my ear and I moan. He takes some shower creme in his hands and lather them up real good. Then he starts washing my body, taking extra care to make sure my boobs are clean. His hand move down and he kneels down, lathering up my legs from my feet and up.

“Saving the best for last there Ed?” I murmur at him

“Oh you bet babe, the very best for last” his hands move up my legs. He puts the palm of his hand on the lower part of my back “would you please lean forward babe I wanna make sure I clean you real good” I gasp and do as I'm asked. I lean forward do my ass is now right in his face. “Thank you” I hear ans his hands move up the inside of my thighs and starts cleaning every inch of me. He stands up and gets the smaller shower head and he rinses me off. He hands me the shower head and says “I don't know if you use that for what I imagine you do but feel free to when I fuck you in just a short while” I groan “Oh you like that do you, good girl” he kneels down again and plunges his face in between my thighs, licking me and fucking me with his tongue. “Fuck I need to come in now, can't wait” he groans and stands up. I feel the tip of his cock teasing me sliding it back and forth in my folds before sinking in to me to the hilt.

I scream! “Yeeesss Ed!” He grabs my hips and holds on tight as he fucks me with long deep strokes, I fiddle a little with the shower head but I finally get the jet stream working. I lower it to my clit and I feel my knees turn in to spaghetti. Before I know it I scream out my orgasm when it hits like a freight train. My legs wobble and I giggle “Well I'm going down on my knees for you now babe” I fall to the floor and I turn so I'm facing Eddie, I reach up and I grip his hard cock and I start stroking it. I look up at him, he's panting looking at me with black eyes nodding at me, I open my mouth and I take the tip in just to tease a bit. I can taste myself on him. I play with my tongue around the head for a little bit then I let him slowly slide all the way down my throat. I let my tongue play on the shaft with every upstroke. Eddie is moaning so loud now. I grab his hips and I pick up the pace, not so deep now but faster. He grabs my head burying his fingers in my hair

“Yes, oh fuck Hailey, fuck babe you're so good at that... close now” I let my hand slide up and cup his balls, I massage them softly and I feel them tightening. The hand in my hair grabs on tighter and I hear by Eddies breathing this is it. I take him in real deep one more time and he lets out a guttural scream “AAAAHHH babe here it comeeees” as I feel the warm fluid shoot down my throat. The grip on my hair releases and he slides down the shower wall so he's face to face with me. He laughs a soft laugh “That was... fucking heaven babe” We're sitting on the shower floor panting looking at each other.

“Sleep or food” I ask him

“I'd say maybe breakfast then a nap? Maybe I can make you food this time?” he smiles at me

“I'd love that Ed. Let's get up from here it's not the most comfortable floor” I giggle and he agrees. We get up and leave the shower. I hand him a towel and I wrap myself in one. We head out to my bed, I sit down and dry my self then I start dressing. Eddie hasn't moved “Uhm something wrong Ed?” I ask

“You're just so fucking beautiful” he's staring at me and I turn blood red in the face and down my chest

“Stop it, Ed”

“No but you are, in this light. In this normal room, not a dirty old trailer bedroom, you're the most perfect woman I've ever seen. I mean not that you weren't back at the trailer but it's just so much more obvious here” he comes up to me and wraps his arms around me “how the hell did an old freak like me get this lucky?” I smile as I'm wrapped in his wonderful arms

“You found the one girl crazy enough to have a crush on a guy she'd never seen on anything more than a photo” I say and he laughs

“That's true, you are crazy. But I did mean it you know... I love you” he says his voice getting lower at the end. I look up at him and kiss him.

“Hey freak, I loved you first” I smile at him “now get dressed, I'm hungry”

“Ok, wouldn't dare keep a hungry girl waiting that much I have picked up on over the years” he puts his clothes on and we head down the stairs and in to the kitchen. There's a note on the counter

“Remind me to oil that bed of yours...it creaks. But happy for you, I hope you'll tell me some day Love Dad” I groan and I blush handing the note to Eddie who laughs out loud

“Ouch, poor Steve. If he only knew”

“Well... as he wrote 'some day' he will know. And yeah poor dad” I laugh to now

Eddie makes me breakfast and we sit at the table talking and laughing like any couple. It feels so good doing this with him, feels so natural. By the time we finished eating and had some coffee it's noon.

“I'm sorry Ed, but I don't think we can risk having a nap together... Sometimes Nancy comes home for lunch and I can bet my ass if we go to bed now she'll be home in 30 minutes” he smiles at me

“Well, I didn't really tell Wayne I was leaving so he might be wondering where I'm at. I need to get back to him, make sure he's ok. Then I was thinking of going out to that motel outside of town to see if they have a room. I mean not only so we can sleep together but I would love to sleep in a bed, that couch is killing my back” he laughs

“Ok, well I have some stuff I need to help out with for Saturday too so. Call my cell when you know if you're moving out to the motel or if you're still at Wayne's tonight then” I say and I lean in and kiss him. He grabs my head between his hands and kiss me back with so much emotion it almost makes me tear up. It's fucking crazy how fast I fell for this man. “Hey Ed, how are you going to get out to the motel by the way? You don't have a car? I know I said I'd drive you but I'm running late as it is” I ask as we part

“Well, I think I got Wayne's old crap mobile to work. Been fiddling with it when I've not been with you” he says and kisses me again, stroking a lock of my hair off my face. “It should at least get me to where I need to go now, and when the news that I'm back is official I'll look for a better car”

We finish cleaning up and we leave. I drive Eddie home and then I head in to town. I was put on buying decorations duty, which is always fun. I like planning parties, I think Nancy influenced that in me in recent years. I got to think 80's I tell myself... So over the top and colorful. I head from store to store picking up bits and pieces everywhere, but I think I have a perfect 80's party in my car as I head home. My phone rings, me thinking it's Eddie I just answer with a

“Hey”

“Hello? Is this Hailey Harrington?” a mans voice asks

“Oh, yes it is. I'm sorry I thought it was a friend calling”

“This is Owen Brown from the library”

“Yes, of course Mr. Brown how are you?”

“Very well thank you. I wanted to let you know we are gladly offering you a position with us at the library if you're still interested?”

“Really!? Yes! Of course I'm still interested.” I say feeling like screaming

“Well great, could you come in Monday to finalize the paperwork etc? You're set to start on the 1st at 8” he says and I agree to this. We hang up and I actually let out a scream, this is so good! If I'm lucky maybe they'll like me enough to offer me more hours and I might be able to get my own place. Don't get me wrong here I love dad and Nancy but I need to live on my own... or with Eddie I think and smile. I get back home and I carry all the things in to the garage. I'm so happy about the job I need to tell someone! I decide I'm going to go see Wayne. I hop back in my car and I drive over to the trailer park. I get there and I see that Wayne's old beat up Volvo is missing so apparently Eddie got it running. I knock on the door and I enter. Wayne is smiling up at me from the couch

“Hey sweetheart, since when do you knock?”

I hug him and giggle “Since that nephew of yours came along. I don't want to embarrass him by just walking in here”

“Right, yeah...” Wayne sounds a bit weird, I look at him with a questioning face “sit down sweetheart” he pats on the couch beside him. I sit down  feeling uneasy, had Eddie changed his mind and left all together?

“What's wrong Wayne?” I say dreading the answer

“Well... I don't really know how to say this... But here goes. I'm old, not an idiot” he looks at me and I'm even more confused “I see the way you two glance at each other when you think  no one is noticing. He had terrible nightmares last night, I heard him, then he disappears and you come driving him home this morning. Him saying you passed him on the road as he was out for a walk... I love you both very much and I AM happy for you, even more so if he can sleep around you so that's why he left last night and why he gave me some cock and bull story about getting a motel room because he couldn't sleep on the couch any longer” I look at him and I do have the decency to blush “But Hailey, what about Steve? What's he gonna say to this you think? And the rest of 'em? 21 years is a lot honey.”

“I... don't know what to tell you Wayne... I'm sorry we tried to hide it, I never ever thought you're an idiot” I smile at him “but I love him Wayne, I've been in love with the idea of Eddie since I was a teen. Now it just kind of manifested when I got to meet the real man. I know 21 years is a lot, but I really don't think of that or care for that matter. Dad is a complicated thing we're just going to have to deal with. We've decided not to tell anyone until after dads party, we don't want to ruin his surprise.” I sigh and I look at Wayne

“That's good thinking, not wanting to ruin Steve's party, he was so excited when he visited me at the hospital. But as I said, you have my blessing and if I can be of any help with Steve I'll do my very best. Hailey” he takes my hand “thank you for this... Now I know I'll get to keep him around for a bit”

I start to cry, feeling so bad having kept this from Wayne, also feeling good that one person around us was happy about this. Wayne strokes me over my hair as I sit leaning forward with my head in my hands crying

“There, there it's ok I didn't mean to make you sad love”

We hear the door open, I can't look up but I hear the gasp and Eddies voice

“What's wrong what happened?” he runs up to me and kneels in front of me rubbing my arms “What's the matter Hailey, please say something”

“I don't think anything's really wrong, I think it's just built up tension from keeping secrets leaving the body” I hear Wayne say and I can tell he's smiling

“Tension? Secrets...? Oh” Eddie's voice changes to almost a whisper at the end

“Yeah I just told her I wasn't an idiot, that I figured out something was going on. Didn't think this one here has fallen in love with you Ed, you're a lucky one” Wayne says in a calm voice

Eddie is still rubbing my arms and I can hear his breathing has changed. He pulls me down on to the floor with him and he wraps his arms around me and hugs me “ Wayne, I have no idea if you're on our side or not...”

“I am son, I am” Wayne interrupts and I hear Eddies heart racing

“You are? Because... well... I love her too. We just thought it was better to keep it hidden until after Saturday. We meant no disrespect” Eddie says while hugging me tight and I keep sobbing

“I know you didn't, none of you are disrespectful people so the thought never crossed my mind. How ever I didn't suspect love if I'm to be honest... I knew there was a thing...maybe a fling or something but now I'm even happier for you”

Eddie lets go of me and he puts a hand on my jaw and makes me look at him “Babe, you don't need to cry, he's happy. You heard that right? Don't feel bad for keeping it from him ok. I know that what's bothering you most right now am I right?” I nod and  wipe my tears and I look over at Wayne, he's just smiling at me holding his arms out. I get up and I fall into his arms

“There there sweetheart I love the both of you, you both deserve happiness. But I'm going to be honest Hailey I think Ed deserves it more, and I'm so happy he found it in you.” Now it's Eddies turn to tear up and sit on the couch with his head in his hands “What is this cry fest 2008? What have I done” Wayne chuckles and I have to giggle through my tears. I sit down on the couch between them and I wrap my arms around Eddie.

“Thank you Wayne” I say and wipe what's left of my tears from my face “but I actually came here with good news, so what do you say Ed, stop the crying and be happy?” I stroke his hair and he looks up at me

“Yeah, happy is better” he wipes his tears as well and takes my hand “Ok now, what's the good news?”

“I got the job at the library, I start on the 1st” I say and beam at them

“What you did sweetheart that's amazing, did you tell me you applied?” Wayne looks a little confused

“No sweetie, I'm sorry I applied the same day you went in to the hospital. I didn't get a chance to tell you” I say

“Oh, well congratulations even so. That's a good job for you! Full time?”

“No, part time now in the beginning, but I hope to charm them enough to give me more hours so I might be able to afford a place of my... our own?” I say and look at Eddie who smiles at me

“Our own sounds amazing Hailey” he says and Wayne beams at us “ehmmm sorry Wayne but I am going to leave you. I got a motel room outside of town. I can't be this close to... you know. I think that's what's making the dreams so bad now, and I can have Hailey at my side. Maybe then I can sleep for more than a couple of hours for the first time in 21 years”

“Yeah I figured as much, I told Hailey that's what made me realize my suspicions were in fact true. When you had your nightmares last night then leaving at 1 am and her driving you here today.” Wayne smiles at him “I'll be alright, I have phone so I can call if I need anything”

“I thought I had a good story” Eddie chuckles

“You haven't walked anywhere voluntarily since you got that van back in 84 Ed, you thought I would believe you'd all of a sudden picked up walking as a hobby?” Wayne laughs and Eddie joins him laughing. I look at my watch and realize I need to get back home to make dinner. I always do on Fridays.

“Well my two favorite men, don't tell dad, I need to leave now. I make dinner on Fridays.” I say and they both smile at me. Now that the secret's out Eddie gets up and he kisses me

“Room 814 tonight?” he says

“I'll be there” I caress his face softly and kiss him back “Wayne, take care and call if there's anything I can do for you”

“Of course sweetheart, can I say you two look so sweet together it warms an old mans heart”

I smile at him and go up and kiss him on the forehead “Thank you Wayne” I say and then I leave to go home and start dinner.

I get to the house and I see dads car is home already. Weird he's usually very busy Fridays since there's a lot to get done for the weekend. I go in and I call out “Dad? You home already?”

“Yeah in the kitchen honey” he answers me, I go in there and he's unpacking cartons of beer into the fridge.

“Someone's having a party” I say and giggle

“You should see the bar... That's STACKED” he chuckles

“So what? You're getting them all shit faced before bringing Eddie out?” I say

“Nah, not before...” he laughs

“Speaking of which, what time should I go pick him up?” I ask

“Oh...hmmm... We said the party starts at 6, and I was thinking some welcome drinks and waiting for everyone to show up might be like 45 minutes so say you get him here by 7? Go in through the garage  and I'll come get you. I thought we'd go for a BIG reveal kind of thing” he's put SO much thought in to this and I love him for it “but hey I spoke to Eddie right before you came home, he's moved out to the motel outside of town, the memories getting the better of him he can't sleep. You know the place?” he says

“Yeah it's the one by the highway right?” I say as casually as I can

“That's the one, pick him up there around 6:30 then I guess. I can call and tell him” dad smiles

“Sounds good. But if you're done with the fridge now I want to start with dinner, I'm kind of hungry” I say and dad finishes putting the beers away and moves over. He sits down at the table looking through the plans Nancy has made for the party.

“So we eat then I thought we might start with decorating the downstairs lounge? Seems the best place to have this thing seeing as the bar is right there” he laughs

“Sounds like a plan, I do need to go to Macy's later on. She's having some serious personal problems and I promised I would be there for her since the rest of the weekend will be dedicated to other things” I look over at dad and smile

“You know you can tell me right?” he smiles back at me

“Tell you?”

“Yeah I mean the other morning... Not as stupid as I look sweetheart” he smirks at me

“Oh... yeah I saw the note. Sorry dad” I blush “but... I don't know what that is yet so if you don't mind I think I wanna wait to talk about it too much” I say... I mean not a complete lie

“Ok honey, but that's where you're really going isn't it? He good to you at least?” he sounds concerned

“Yeah dad, the best. But it's just very new... and yes that is where I'm really going” I have to be as honest as I can, I owe him that considering what's to come “so what are you and Nancy up to tonight then?” I ask, making sure he doesn't get the idea to visit Eddie

“Oh Nancy has me on duty all night. Preparing food for tomorrow, looking up drinks from the 80's and well probably just bossing me around until I fall asleep standing up” he pretends to faint

“Hahaha , you have everything or is there something I can go get while I'm out?” I ask taking yet another precaution

“I don't think there's anything we've forgotten to get. But if there is can I call your cell? Would be nice not having to leave the house” he sighs

“Of course dad! Just call, I mean if I'm busy...ehmmm... text me what you need” I say and he looks a little uncomfortable

“Yeah I think I'll stick with texting... Just in case...don't wanna disturb you” he grunts and I have to laugh at him

“I have some good news though. You want them now or should we wait for Nancy?”

“Well, I would like to know like right now but lets wait. That way you don't have to tell the same thing twice” he says

I start making dinner and he continues down to the lounge to unpack a few more bottles into the bar. My cell vibrates in my pocket, I take it out. It's a picture from Eddie. I open it and I drop the spoon I'm stirring with. It's him, or well the bottom part of him. Very much awake and erect text saying

“I'm trying out the new bed, I think this will do just fine. Right ;) “

I reply “WOW! I love that bed looks comfy can't wait to sit on it “ then I hear dad coming up the stairs and I have to put the phone away, take a few deeps breaths and pick up the spoon I dropped.

“So, I think I can make the lot of us flat out unconscious if we manage to down all of that” he sounds sort of proud and I have to laugh, I feel the vibration in my pocket again but I fight the urge to look and see if there are more pictures for me.

“Hey dad could you watch the sauce for me I need to pee” I say

“Oh sure, what are you making us?” he says

“Lasagna” I say and a big smile breaks his face

“I love your lasagna honey, perfect Friday!” he goes and stands at the stove while I hurry out to the downstairs bathroom.

I take my phone out again and unlock it seeing I have 2 more messages from Eddie. The first one is just a text saying

“Hell yeah babe you can sit on it as much as you like, make sure to bounce good ;) “ the other one is another picture. I open it and I moan. It's of his amazing abs with that perfect cock resting on it pre-cum glistening at the tip. Text saying “I'm not distracting you am I?“

I take of my pants and I sit down on the edge of the tub, pulling one leg up and spreading the other out to the side making for a very graphic picture. I'm wet and you can actually see it in the picture I take. I send it to him “No, not at all. Does it look like it? ;) “ I flush the toilet just for good measure and I wait a little for him to answer. Within seconds the phone buzzes

“Fuck me that's inviting, you bring that here asap! I need that!”

“Oh I intend to, just need to feed these two first so they don't come looking for me. I'll call when I get in the car” I text back

“Sounds good babe. See you in a bit then “

I get out of the bathroom and head back to the kitchen. Dad's still at the stove stirring the sauce.

“Thank you for excellent sauce watching, I'll take it from here” I kiss his cheek

“Yeah I am the sauce watcher extraordinaire! No one like me, I'll be down stairs decorating, call me if you need me or when dinner's ready” he says and leaves the kitchen. I continue making the food, all the while smiling like an idiot at the pictures in my mind. Seriously couldn't ha have aged like just a little? This is just unfair being this attractive... I sigh deeply as I out the lasagna in the oven to finish. I sit down at the table, flip through a magazine and I feel my phone vibrate again. I smile and pull it out of my pocket. Eddie again

“Soooo... I had to, that pic u sent was just 2 good” and then there's a short video of him laying on his back cum all over his chest panting heavily whispering “thanks babe” to the camera. I'm about to lose my shit here. I shouldn't have given this man my cellphone number, this will be constant distractions all day long.

“You're a god damn tease Munson! You know that right? But fuck me that's sexy” I reply. Doesn't take long for the reply to come back

“Oh I know I am, you love that about me ;) and I'm glad u like” I have to put my phone away now so I can get anything at all done or I'll never get to go out to the motel and see him. I put the phone back in my pocket and start setting the table. I call down to dad

“Hey is Nancy coming home soon or should I skip her?”

“Uhhh... I think she'll be home any minute so set her place as well.” he calls back

I finish with that then I check the lasagna, like 5 more minutes and it's done. I decide to make a salad just to keep myself from checking my phone again. I get the food and I call for dad. As soon as he gets up the stairs we hear Nancy's car pull up.

“That woman has timing” dad smiles

We eat and have a very nice talk, make plans about the coming day. Who does what and when. Dad said he's pretty much finished setting up all the wall and ceiling decorations. He compliments me on a very 80's vibe with the things I bought. I tell them about the job and they're ecstatic for me!

Once dinner is done and we've cleared everything I rush up the stairs and hop in the shower. I pick out an outfit I think Eddie will really like, it's actually partly an old Halloween outfit from a couple of years ago. I was dressed as a pirate so I bought these second hand leather pants, they were perfect then but now they're a tight fit. Even better I think and smile. Then I pair that with my old Ozzy t-shirt and my denim jacket. I realize as I walk down stairs that this outfit is very obvious... let's hope dad is already in the living room. Fortunately for me he is, I call to them

“Ok I'm leaving, I'll be back no later than 10 tomorrow. Text me if there's anything missing that I can pick up ok?”

“Sure thing sweetheart, have fun now” and I hear him chuckle then saying to Nancy “Yeah I'll tell you”

I get in my car and I call Eddie

“Hey there” I can hear him smiling

“Hey tease, I'm leaving now. We need anything?” I say

“Maybe some snacks for after, get our strength beck” he chuckles

“True, I'll get something for us. Hey Ed...”

“Yeah?”

“You bring the ties with you?” I ask and smile

I hear a loud gasp “Damn... got me all excited just by saying that. But yeah actually I did” he says in a husky voice

“Good! See you soon then” I say and I hang up. I drive by the supermarket and get some snacks and some beers. Then I head for the motel. I feel my excitement getting higher the closer I get and by the time I park my car I can feel that I've soaked my panties. What kind of power does this man have over me? Not even a week and I'm like addicted. I check for the room numbers to see which way I'm going. Seems to be o the 2nd floor to the right. I get up there and follow the corridor to room  814. I knock on the door, I hear Eddies voice inside. He opens the door but instantly hushes me with his finger.

“Yeah sure thing Steve” I almost start to giggle as I quietly close the door behind me and lock it “yeah that works for me, she knows where this place is? Ok good, well I'll see you tomorrow then. What? Nah I'm just going to watch a movie and try to sleep...as usual. Yeah ok man, bye” he hangs up and wraps his arms around me and pull me in close.

“Hey babe, sorry about that. But I mean I had to make sure my ride knows where to pick me up tomorrow” he smiles and gives me a kiss grabbing my ass with both hands and squeezing it tight “You look fucking amazing by the way! Love the pants and the shirt....and the girl” he kisses me again deeper this time, his tongue playing with mine. He moans and then he picks me up so my legs wrap around him and carries me to the bed. He throws me down on it and looks down at me “fucking perfect woman” he mumbles and I blush

“You're the one to talk” I say “If anyone around here is perfect it's you”

“You're weird” he chuckles and flops down with me on the bed kissing me all over my face tickling me making me scream with laughter. “Wanna actually watch a movie and have some snacks, just take it easy for a bit? Then I'll let you use me as you see fit” he purrs

“Sounds amazing Ed, let me just get the stuff I bought and get out of these pants. They're a bit tight” I giggle

“I can see that and damn I love them” he growls at me

I get out of the bet and get the bag of snacks. I put the beers in the small fridge, taking two of them with me to the bed. Then I take of the jacket and unbutton the pants. I slowly take them off keeping eye contact with the man on the bed the whole time. He's watching me with the most intense stare

“God you're sexy Hailey” he says and all I can do is smile.

I crawl up to him in the bed and lie down beside him, putting one leg over his hips and arms around him. He lets his hand slide up my leg and land on my ass.

“This is perfect! Movie, beer in one hand and a great ass in the other.” he says and squeezes my ass and kisses me.

“Well I am glad you like this ass, I was actually thinking you might like to use it later...” I whisper not knowing how this would be received

“Use... Like...oh wow. You sure? I mean finger or...cock?” he sounds both surprised and excited

“Well... I've never done either so maybe start with finger and see how I like it? Just a dream I had” I say and smile into his chest kissing it on top of his shirt

“Well I am here for any and all of the things you wanna try babe. Count me in” he says

“Good” I smile and kiss him “I'm not a total newbie at sex but I'm pretty boring in terms of things I've tried” I admit and he shakes his head

“Nah, not boring in any way!” he squeezes my ass tighter “and I will gladly use this ass in any way you'll have me. But what about a movie now? We have all night for other things”

“Maybe not all night I have to be home by 10 tomorrow to help with the last stuff for the party” I remind him

“Right... That” he chuckles “I'd much rather just call everyone go like 'Hey I'm back' then turn my phone off and have the rest of the day to fuck you in every imaginable way”

“Oh we can save that for another day... any day... every day for ever and ever” I say and smile up at him

“Good plan babe. So what are you in the mood for? I don't even know what kind of movies you like” he says

“Well I'm a big fan of superhero movies and fantasy like Harry Potter or Lord of the rings. But then again I do love a soppy romance once in a while. LOVE Dirty Dancing seen it like 50 times” I say and laugh Eddie just stares at me

“So you ARE the perfect woman? I mean besides Dirty Dancing you're me...” he beams at me “Haven't actually seen any of the Harry Potter movies to be honest. Been wanting to but I mean it's no fun when you're always alone.” He sounds so sad

“Well then, we must fix this! No man of mine can be a Harry virgin that's for sure! Lets see if they have the first one on pay per view otherwise I'll drive home real quick and get my copy I see there's a DVD player” I say as I turn on the TV and flip through the movies available. “Ah here we are Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone” I choose it and we get comfy under the covers. Eddie has stripped down into his underwear and I'm in my t-shirt and panties. The movie starts and I feel so comfortable, this is it. This is what a relationship should be like. Doing stuff like this. 2,5 hours later as the end credits roll I look at Eddie. His eyes are beaming

“That was amazing! I loved it! Ok so next movie night we're watching the next one! How many are there?” he asks

“Well there are 3 more coming out, next one premiers next year I think. But we have 5 to watch” I say and smile at him I'm happy he liked it. I thought it might not be his thing really. He pulls me in close

“Good, but now I want to watch something else completely babe. I wanna watch you come all over me” he purrs and I let out a moan

“Wow” that's all my brain can get out at this moment, he smiles and gets on top of me. He starts kissing me deeply, moving down to kiss my neck and my jawline. His hands move up under my     t-shirt

“Sorry Ozzy man but you gotta go now” he chuckles and pulls my shirt over my head and tosses it on the floor. “look at these tits so fucking perfect” he mumbles as he moves his head down and kiss them. He sucks on the nipple, biting down on it slightly. His hands massaging them and pinching the nipple on the side his mouth isn't working on. I begin to squirm under him as I get more and more horny. I can feel that he's liking this very much too. The twitch of his cock on my thigh is such a turn on for me. I moan and drive my fingers through his hair grabbing a handful and tugging at it making him groan. “Mmmm yeah just like that good girl... but you wanna spread those sexy legs for me now” I spread my legs so he can sit up on his knees between them. He really is a spectacular sight. So fucking sexy, those strong shoulders and that chest and those abs. The scars don't make him any less sexy they just ad to the mystery that is Eddie Munson, and lets not forget those veiny, strong tattooed arms. I moan loudly as I watch him

“Fuck Ed, you're perfect” I can't help but to move my hips against him. He smiles at me and looks down

“Wow babe, damn you're wet. What do you say we remove these panties?” he grabs the lining of them and pull on them, I raise my ass of the bed so he can pull them off then I stretch my legs up in the air so he can pull them off me completely. I put my legs back on either side of him and he lets his hands slide down my inner thighs and softly play with the curls on my mound. “Have I told you I love that you're not shaved” he purrs “I find the bush so sexy” then he lets his fingers find their way in between my folds and I can hear how fucking wet I am. He starts circling my clit with his thumb while the fingers on the other hand find their way in to my folds and in me. He starts off with long slow strokes with two fingers making a come here motion with them when he stops inside me then fucking me again. I writhe under him moaning like crazy, he is SO good at this. Then he moves down on the bed laying down between my legs and I feel his thumb being replaced with his tongue. He licks, sucks and flicks my clit all the time fucking me with his fingers. Then he pulls them out and he moves them down to my ass “Wanna give it a try babe? I promise I'll go slow” I just nod and moan something in response he lets out a soft laugh “I guess so” I feel him using my pussy juices to lube up my asshole before slowly pressing one finger against it. I feel it enter and I gasp. It's not painful as I thought but then again a finger isn't that big. He keeps working my clit as he fucks my ass slowly with one finger, it feels so good. But then I feel him pull out and murmur “You know I think that might have more effect if I finger your ass while fucking you babe, I think you might enjoy that. I just wanna feel you come around my cock now, please get on all fours” I get up on my knees and kiss him tasting myself on him.

“Can I please just get a taste first” I whisper and put my hand on his cock on top of his boxers he groans

“You needn't ask permission for that just swallow him whole for all I care” he grunts and stands up in the bed so I can pull down his boxers freeing that wonderful member trapped inside. As it springs free I moan and grab it giving it some long slow strokes making Eddie let out a guttural moan.

“Lie down please” I say and he flops down beside me fast as a bullet. I lean over him and take as much as I can of him in one go.  I suck him deep for a few strokes and he's holding on to my hair making the sexiest sounds. I stop sucking him and begin to work the tip with my tongue swirling around it and licking down the shaft, then I take him in  again and suck him faster. He's almost screaming now

“Fuck babe, as amazing as that is I really wanna come inside of you while you come on my cock.” I let him go and get on all fours arching my back so my ass is really popping out at him. “Oh my fucking god babe that ass and that pussy...” he grabs my hips and dives in with his face and gives me a couple of more licks then I feel him kneel behind me and I feel the tip of him rub against my clit “You want this babe?” he purrs

“Yes Ed, I want it please” I pant and he chuckles as he drags his cock up and down my slit a few times before plunging in to me with a groan. He slides in all the way to the hilt then stopping and just staying still letting us both enjoy the feeling. Then he slowly starts doing long strokes in and out of me picking up the pace every few strokes. Faster and faster he fucks me and I feel like I'm going insane, then he stops and I feel him spit on my ass and I moan even louder. I feel not one but two fingers press on my ass hole.

“Let me know if this is too much or if it hurts” he grunts and presses the fingers slowly in to me while staying still with hos cock in me. Not going to lie two fingers hurt a little at first but once my ass got used to them it felt good and I start to circle my hips moving my pussy over Eddies cock. I hear him moan and picking up the pace again. The sensation of his big cock fucking me while his fingers play in my pussy is amazing and I feel I'm close and I can hear by the sounds Eddie is making he's fast approaching also. I reach down between my legs and I start playing with my clit. I feel the tension spilling over and I scream as the orgasm hits

“Eddiiiieeeeee fuuuuuck yes yes yes” I feel him grabbing my hip with his free hand and a long guttural groan comes out of him as I feel him filling me up with his cum. Be pulls his fingers out of me and leans down to kiss my back.

“You are amazing you know that, but damn girl you nearly took my fingers off with that ass... that was a tight squeeze” he whispers in my ear “if you'll let me try some day I'd like to fuck your ass for real feel that squeeze on my cock as well”

“I think I would like to try that” I pant, those fingers made a difference let me tell you “sorry we didn't get to tie you down this time” I say as he gets up from the bed to go and clean himself off

“Hey sweetheart, that was NOT the last time we fuck. There's time” he smiles at me and goes in to the bathroom. I hear him get in the shower and I crawl out of bed and go in there

“Can I join you?”

“Of course” he says and opens the shower door for me, I get in and slide past him so I'm standing in front of him. I put my head on his chest as the water drenches us. “You tired babe?” he says to me in a hushed voice as he cleans my back for me

“Yeah, someone took all my energy from me” I wink at him “but it was so good I don't mind” I kiss his scar on the right shoulder, then the left and I work my way through all of them giving each one a kiss. Eddie stands there just looking down at me

“How can you be so ok with them? They're hideous” he whispers and I can hear his voice is strained

“I find them beautiful, as a part of you. Don't you remember that second time I came to the trailer when you were fresh out of the shower and I couldn't help myself from touching them? They fascinate me, they make you sexier in my eyes” I say and look back up at him

He kisses me and I can tell he's fighting the tears “I love you” is all he can say and I hear it's not easy keeping his voice from breaking

“I love you too. I trust you've accepted that by now?” I say and he nods in to my neck “Good! But lets finish washing up and get to bed, I want to cuddle” I say and I can feel him smiling against the crease of my neck. He kisses me softly and gives me a little bite and stands up straight again.

“Sounds awesome babe” we finish up then we head back to bed. We lie down and Eddie spoons me and I feel safe and loved for the first time, this is what it's supposed to be, supposed to feel like. I feel such joy I almost want to cry. Eddie nuzzles in to the back of my head and falls asleep before I do. I lie there listening to him breath for a little while then I drift off to sleep also. No more than 2 hours go by and I am woken up by the sounds of Eddie having a hard time with his nightmares again. I look at the time 2 am, seems to be the unholy hour for him. The screaming, the squirming, the fighting to get away and the over all panic. I wrap my arms around him again and start rocking him and hum to him. The tension releases it's grip on him and he calms down, he's still asleep but not as agitated. I feel tears falling from his face down om my chest.

“Eddie love, I'm here. They can't hurt you now” I whisper and kiss his head “I'll never let them get you” he flinches and is awake tears streaming down his face and he crawls in to a ball sobbing into my chest

“Kill me, fucking kill me I can't take this anymore” I freeze, he's never said anything like this before and I start crying

“Eddie, never say that again!” I say and crawl down so I'm face to face with him “Never EVER say that again! Let me help you, let me hear about it. Don't keep it all inside, please... I don't want to see you like this it's so scary” I say tears now drenching my face to. He looks at me takes my face in his hands and kisses me with such passion it takes my breath away

“I can't promise I'll never say it again, but I can promise I will NEVER leave you. Also I will talk about it...just not now before the party. Maybe after we tell everyone I'm staying put....with you. I mean the subject will come up.” he says and kisses me again

“Ok, deal Ed. But please never scare me like that again...” I say wiping my tears

“I'm so sorry Hailey, I didn't think I said it out loud. Those intrusive thoughts have been with me for 21 years now...” he sounds so defeated “could you hold me and we try getting some more sleep?” he asks

“Of course I'll hold you, for ever and ever if it helps you sleep” I say and we get comfortable again me with Eddie in my arms. He falls asleep again, and I just hold him letting the tears fall again. What on earth did he go through? I didn't think it would but sleep came to me again. I wake up to a sunny morning. It's 8 am, Eddie is still in my arms asleep and I smile. This is a good thing. I kiss him on the forehead “Eddie sweetie, it's morning I hate to say it but I need to get up” he stirs and stretches. He looks up at me

“What time is it?”

“It's 8 am” I say and he looks stunned

“You mean to tell me I slept all night? With the exception of that one episode?”

“Yeah, I just woke up and you haven't moved since you fell asleep around 2.” I say

“Ok from now on you hold me...you hold me tight! I haven't slept that many hours since before...it” he says and smile at me

“I'll gladly hold you, all night every night. From now on you're the little spoon” I say to him and kiss him “But big spoon needs to get up now unfortunately.

“Really, right now?” he asks and gives me a smirk

“Yeah, why?” I ask and he lifts the covers “Oh, well hello there. Not only you that's awake I see” I say and let my hand grab his semi. It quickly becomes rock hard and I moan “God you're going to make me late for everything for the rest of my life aren't you?” I stroke him and hear those amazing little sounds of pleasure he does. I lean in and take him in my mouth and he groans loudly, this trigger me to take him in as much as I can. His hands find my hair and grab hold of it. He's breathing really heavy moaning and raising his hips to meet my mouth with every down stroke. I stop sucking and straddle him, with my hand I position him just right and I ease down on his cock until he's filled me up completely. I let out a guttural scream. He fits sooo good in me. I ride him a fast and steady pace, he sits up and wraps hos arms around me meeting me thrust for thrust

“Come for me babe, I wanna feel you squeeze every last drop out of me” he murmurs in a husky voice in my ear sending shiver down my spine. I reach down between us and let my fingers play on my clit, I'm getting closer and closer. Eddie is to I can hear it. He grabs my waist and tips me over on my back and then he kneels between my legs as he lifts my ass up from the bed and drives his cock back in to me. “Keep playing with yourself I'm so close I just wanna watch you come on me “ he growls and starts fucking me with long strokes. It doesn't take long before I feel that knot in my stomach dissolve and the pleasure take over. I scream out Eddies name and fell myself pulsate around him making him growl and I feel him releasing inside of me. His cock twitching against my insides. He lets go of my ass and I flop down on the bed again.

“Fuck you're amazing. See we need no fancy shit to make each other scream babe” he smiles at me

“No we do not” but now I really need to get up, this made me need to shower again. That wasn't in the plans” I say and smirk at him

“Oh sorry my penis ruined you plans” he laughs and I can't help but laugh with him

“Yeah very rude of him being so fucking awesome I can't leave him alone” I say and kiss him before I get out of bed.

“Yeah I'll have a talk with him” he chuckles “hurry back I want some more kisses before you have to leave

I go and hop in the shower and make it a quick one just washing the part needing to be washed. Then I go back out and crawl down beside Eddie again, it's 9 now I need to leave real soon. We lay there kissing for a bit arms tight around each other.

“I need to go now Ed, but I'll be back like 6:30. If you still have your jacket and the west I've seen in pictures could you still fit in them? I have an idea for the surprise you see” I say as I get up and start to dress again

“Yeah I have them, I think they still fit. Maybe a rather snug fit but not too bad I guess. The theme was 80's right? So maybe just a white T and a pair of black jeans and I'll rock my old high school look” he grins at me

“That was the idea” I say and lean back over him giving him one more kiss “ok see you later then. Remember to keep your hands to yourself tonight, however sexy I look” I purr at him and he snorts

“Thanks, now I'm not going to be able to think of anything else all day except what you might be wearing tonight. AND that I can't fucking touch you whenever I want to. Ok go now and I'll see you later, might text you if I get too lonely” he winks at me

“Keep it in your pants there Munson, or at least out of my phone for today. I don't need that sort of distraction. I love for you to send me pictures any other day but today I can't be idiot grinning at my phone all day” I say and smile at him

“Ok ok I promise, I'll go hang out with Wayne for a bit keep my mind occupied”

“You do that, send him my love” I say, Eddie nods and I leave. I check my phone, no messages so I guess I don't need to pick anything up so I head straight home. There's chaos from the get go. As soon as I enter the door dad throws a cookbook at me

“Find something we can make as a starter” then he runs past me and in to the living room. I laugh, ok so this is too much for them, they're breaking down. I go in to the kitchen where Nancy is standing at the counter watching my dad run around like a crazy person

“Soooo? How long has he been freaking out?” I ask her as I go up and stand next to her

“Since 7 this morning, I have no clue why he's so panicked about this. It's just a party with friends. I've made all the food we could possibly need, he's got enough to drink to drown us all and the lounge looks amazing. I have no clue what this is... I mean he doesn't even listen to me. Did I just see him throw that at you saying you need to make a starter?” she looks at the book in my hand

“Yeah, I barely had a chance to close the door” I laugh

“Well you don't have to... I've made three different starters, we do not need more food. I think I need to hit him over the head soon to slow him down” she giggles and I nod in agreement looking at him running around like a headless chicken

“DAD!” I yell startling him to a halt “Calm down right now. Everything is fixed, nothing more needs to be done ok? Sit down, take a nap or something.” I look at him with a stern face

“But... Are you SURE everything is ok?”

“Honey I've been telling you this since 7 am, we finished everything last night. You can relax now” Nancy smiles at him “how about some brunch? Have you eaten sweetheart?” she asks me and I feel how hungry I actually am

“No I haven't, I would love some brunch. I can make pancakes?” I say knowing they both love my pancakes

“Yes, please do! I can get some toast and bacon going and coffee. And YOU!” he points at my dad “SIT DOWN!”

I laugh and agree strongly, dad huffs a little but sits down at the table. I get an idea and I go up to him and I whisper in his ear so Nancy won't hear me

“Dad I had an idea, call Dustin and have him bring Eddies old Hellfire shirt... I think that would be a nice touch” dad looks up at me beaming and nodding. He gets up and leaves the room

“What did you say to get him to leave that calmly?” Nancy is amazed

“Years of freak outs Nance” I wink at her and she laughs. We start preparing brunch and dad comes back and gives me a small nod . I smile and think to myself that that's going to be the icing on the cake for Eddies outfit. We eat and go through the plans for the evening again. Dad tells me he ordered a cake that maybe I can pick up when I get the gift, Nancy just shakes her head and mumbles something about spoiling her and not necessary, no one listens to her. Time flies and all of a sudden it's 4:30 and I have to start getting ready since I have to leave at 6 and I want to make sure I look extra good. I took Robin with me the other day to the second hand store to find the PERFECT 80's dress, and who better to advice me than someone who was a teenager back then. I find a pink dress that's really fitted but looks stunning on me Robin says. It's strapless and goes down to my knees. I can barely move in it since it's so tight. But I feel sexy in it so that doesn't matter. I get some black fishnets and a pair of black pumps. Also what was the 80's if not accessories? Big earrings and flashy necklace. I have some idea of what to do with my hair, I know it needs to be BIG. I'll ask Nancy to help me figure something out. I lay all of the things out on my bed. I have to shower, do my hair and makeup before leaving then I'll get dressed when I've left Eddie in the garage. I call for Nancy to come and help me figure out what to do with my hair. We opt for big and teased. Since my hair is naturally wavy it has it's own volume but we help it out some. I find a hair tie from when I was a kid that has pink and blur dots that match the dress perfectly I make a high pony with that and I tease the shit out of it. I do my make up, the 80's really was more is more but I'm not so I go subtle with that. The dress will take focus anyway. People start arriving at 5:50 and I go down to say hello to the ones that has arrived. Dustin is first to come holding the frames Hellfire shirt.

“Hey Dustin, happy to see you” I say and give him a hug

“Wow Hailey, you take me back” he chuckles looking at my hair

“Yeah? Wait until you see the outfit” I laugh “so?” I look down at the frame and make a questioning motion to it. I need to know what dad said to him

“Yeah, Steve called and said that maybe I could bring this so that Eddie could be with us in some part” I see him tearing up and I hug him again

“That's nice Dustin, I bet dad will tell him all about it when they talk next. I think he'll be happy to hear it. But I have to go out for a bit, need to get Nancy's gift and a cake. But I'll be back soon”

“Ok, drive safe see you later” he says

As I leave I meet Lucas in the driveway “Hey Lucas, happy to see you. How are you?” I hug him then I hear a voice behind him

“Well he's still a fucking nerd so what do you think?”

“ERICA!!! Oh my god how awesome to see you! Did we know you were coming?” I hug her and I smile, I love Erica but we rarely get to see her she moved to Florida after college

“Nah, I'm here as a surprise. This loser told me all about it so I hopped on a plane and came home for a visit. Wouldn't wanna miss this gathering of the nerd squad” she smiles at me

“I need to go get a cake and Nancy's gift, but I'll be back soon” go inside and surprise the crap out of them I say thinking I'm bringing something to trump it all later. I get in my car and I head for the bakery first. I get the cake and I put it in the back seat strapping it in so it won't move around so much. Then I head for the motel, I get there at 6:30 and I debate going up to Eddies room and get distracted by how sexy he is or just text him and wait here. I go for the texting

“Hey I'm in the parking lot now” doesn't take long for the reply

“Ur not coming up to watch me put on the final touches ;) “ I knew it I smile to myself

“You think we have time for me to get that distracted?”

“What I'm a good boy, there will be no touching” he replies

“Yeah right, I do not trust that for a second. Mostly cuz I'll be touching too. Come now!” I text him back and I get a smiley and a thumbs up back from him. It takes about 2 minutes and I see him coming at me across the parking lot. He looks stunning, very rock and roll. He doesn't look like he aged a bit from the pictures in dads yearbook of him looking exactly like this. He even shaved, making him look younger. The darkness around his eyes have even improved, probably from actually sleeping for more than 2 hours I think as he gets in the car and I beam at him.

“Wow you look amazing Ed, good thing I stayed in the car I would not have been able to keep my hands off you” I wink at him he looks at me

“Well the hair is spot on as I remember it but....” he motions at my clothes

“Yeah I wanted you to see me at the same time as every one else” I say and smile at him “so when we get back home I'll park in the garage and you stay in there until I come get you. Dad wants some grand reveal thing... like jumping out of a box kind of thing.” he looks scared  “But I think I have an even better idea.” I continue telling him my idea and he thinks it sounds very good, he gets a bit teary eyed when I tell him his old Hellfire shirt is waiting there for him. We talk trying very hard to not touch but we fail a little as Eddie runs his hands up my thigh and in between them

“Just a little touch to get me through the night” he winks at me and I spread my legs for him to get a better feel. He slides on finger in under my panties and runs it up and down my slit. I moan and he grunts “Fuck this was a good idea in theory bad in reality. Now I need to cool down.” He removes his hand but can't help to suck his finger while intensely staring at me. I almost drive us off the road.

“You're such a tease but I do love your fingers.” I take his hand and I suck his index finger in to my mouth and swirl my tongue around it

“I'M A TEASE!? Jesus H Christ woman” he growls and shifts in his seat fixing his pants that look very tight suddenly. We laugh a little at the absurdity that we're like horny teenagers that can't keep our hands to ourselves.

“But now we need to put on our poker face, it's almost game time” I say as we turn in to our street and I see my house. I drive up to the garage and open it with my remote. I drive in and whisper to Eddie to keep a little hidden in case someone would get the idea to come out here. He nods and sits down on a box behind a shelf. I smile and get the cake from the car and head inside. Dad meets me in the kitchen

“All good?” he asks and takes the cake from me

“Yeah all good the gift is in the garage” I whisper and continue to tell him mine and Eddies altered plans. He smiles

“That's real good Hailey, I'll see if I can sneak the shirt from Dustin's eyes while you get dressed. See you in here in like 10?”

“Shouldn't I go down and say hello first? Then we can say that I'm getting the gift and you can tell everyone what to do and I'll have him put the shirt on and take him down stairs?” I say and dad agrees that would be the best.

“I'm just going to sneak him a beer” dad says and smiles at me

“Good idea but don't get stuck talking to him so they'll come look for you” I say and head up the stairs.

“I won't, I said I heard you coming so I went to see if you wanted help then I needed the bathroom so I think I have like 5 minutes before they start wondering where I went” he says and I nod and keep going up as he disappears in to the kitchen again.

I run in to my room and undress. I put everything on, check my hair and look in the mirror. Yeah I look like the quintessential 80's it girl that I've seen in old magazines. I go down the stairs again, in to the kitchen and grab myself a beer and head down to the lounge. They're all here now and Robin spots me right away

“Woooow! I knew that look would be amazing for you! You're stunning girl!” she hugs me tight. “Look they're all here even Erica” she beams I knew she would like it once the day came “and Steve laughed so hard when he saw my outfit said it was too bad he didn't keep his” I look at her and smile. She looks like she's 18 again selling ice cream at the mall. I've seen pictures from back then and she hasn't changed I tell her this and she blushes

“What...of course I have! Look here a wrinkle...and here another one” she points at her face

“Must be imaginary then I see nothing” I say and kiss her cheek she smiles at me. I make the rounds and say hey to everyone. Even Joyce and Hopper joined, they said they thought it sounded so nice to see all the kids again in the same place. I give them each a hug and tell them that they're more than welcome. I look at dad and he gives me a nod.

“Sorry but I'm going to run and get Nancy's gift now. I'll be right back” I say and head back up the stairs. I go to the garage and I open the door. “Hey Ed, it's showtime” I say and he comes out from the shadows. He stares at me

“Wow....babe. That dress... Please wear that some other time so I can undress you” he sighs and I giggle at him and give him a quick kiss as I turn to go he slides his hands over my ass “sorry couldn't help it. That dress makes your ass out of this world sexy just so you know” he whispers

“Thank you babe” I whisper back. We stop in the kitchen where dad has taken Eddies Hellfire shirt out of the frame and put it on the counter. Eddie takes off his jacket and west, he removes the white shirt he has on and I moan a little seeing him bare chested in those tight jeans

“Behave” he growls at me but gives me a wink as he pulls his old shirt on and puts the jacket and west back over that. We sneak to the stairs leading down to the lounge. We walk on tip toes down the stairs so we can hear dad

“Well honey, me and Hailey wanted to give you something special for your special birthday. And what better time to give this to you than now when you get to share it with all our old friends. But see I don't want ANYONE to spoil this surprise so I'm going to need you all to close your eyes until I say you can look again.” I hear some laughs and  Robin saying

“Better not be water balloons Harrington I look to good for that” Then there is silence and dad shows up in the door.

He motions to us to come with him, we sneak past them all. But just as Eddie is about to hop up on the bar and face them all we hear a gasp and Jane whispering “Oh this is good” a big smile on her face and a tear falling from her eye. Dad and Eddie smile at each other. So Eddie sits on top of the bar for a moment looking at them all, then he takes a deep breath and nods at dad.

I look at dad and I take out my phone to film this. Still a bit confused about Jane's reaction, but hell if Eddies scars are real then maybe the rest is to. Dad clears his throat

“Ok honey, and the rest of you. Go a head open your eyes” everyone stirs and eyes opening, blinking at the lights. Then there's silence, deafening silence. Eddie gives one of his beaming smiles and says

“Well cheers fuckers” then all hell breaks lose. There's screaming, there's crying everyone wants to hug him and kiss him and make sure he's really there. I stand there filming it all smiling widely. This was a success. Everyone is crowding Eddie except Nancy and Robin they're huddled on the floor crying their eyes out. Eddie sees this and excuses himself from the crowd and goes up to them and sits down on the floor.

“Ok I mean it's been a while ladies but c'mon I'm not that horrible to look at that you have to cry am I?” he smiles at them and they throw themselves around his neck making him fall backwards on the floor. They laugh and they cry in a big pile on the floor. Dad and I just smile at each other. I stop the recording, I need to have some space for photos to. This absolute joy extravaganza continues for another hour or so. Everyone wants to touch Eddie to really REALLY make sure he's there with them again. The only ones I haven't seen hug it out and be all over each other yet is Eddie and Max. I can see she's as happy as the rest of them but she's always been more in the background, not wanting to take up space. I see Eddie look around, spotting Max in the corner watching them all smiling. Everyone turns silent as he walks up to her

“Hey Red, I'm happy you woke up. When I bailed you were still asleep” he wraps his arms around her in a warm embrace

“Likewise Freak, I'm glad you woke up to. I guess your wake up wasn't as happy as mine but still” she hugs him back and I can see them both tearing up over each other's fates.

“Nah, me waking up was not exactly happy no” Eddie says in a hushed voice “we can talk more about this some other day yeah Red? Let's be happy tonight?” he puts his arm around her shoulder and take her with him to join the rest of the gang.

The night is all me and dad would have ever wanted. We eat, we drink, we talk, we laugh. It's absolutely amazing how much joy one man can bring. Later that night we're all scattered around the lounge talking, me being a bit tipsy am sitting on top of a sideboard talking to Erica and Robin. So far this night I've been able to not stare at Eddie every chance I get but now I'm a bit drunk and my mind doesn't understand the consequences of my actions really. I stare at the man I love so much, just admiring his person thinking how it's fucking crazy how good he looks. He keeps glancing back at me with a little smile playing in the corners of his mouth. I sigh and then I hear

“NO! No fucking way Hailey...are you fucking kidding me?” I look up and meet Robins gaze. She looks from me over to Eddie and back again. She grabs my arm and drags me up the stairs and in to the living room. She sits down on the couch... I am very sober now very fast.... fuck

“Hailey PLEASE tell me I'm wrong in thinking he's been around for a while... Say like a week?” she's looking at me pleading eyes

“He...” I sigh what's the point “yeah he's been here a week”

Robin puts her hands over her face and sighs “Hailey... He's the guy right? From the trailer park...”

I can't find my voice so I just look down at my feet and I nod slowly

“Fuck Hailey, really? Eddie? I mean I knew growing up he was some kind of a hero to you, and I saw that you had some crush on him as a teen. But I thought that it was just that... I mean, where do you see this going Hailey? What's going to happen  when he leaves again? I saw by the way you looked at him that you're in deep shit girl” she shakes her head slowly at me

“He's not leaving...” my voice is barely there so it comes out more like a whisper

“What?”

I look at her “He's not leaving...” my voice breaks a little but is stronger

“He's staying here? In Hawkins.... for what” she realizes “for you Hailey? Is he staying for you? Is this.... serious? Not just sex?”

“Robin... I've loved Eddie as a thought for years...now I love him for real. I just...” I start crying so hard. My legs fold under me and I fall down on the floor. She comes down and sits with me putting her arms around me, rocking me

“There, there... You love him? And he...”

“Says he loves me back” I sniffle and wipe my tears

“Oh fuck... Well I mean I love you sweetie and I want you to find love. But have you given any thought as to what... Steve might say” she looks at me

“Well... we were hoping you'd help us out Buckley” Eddies voice is heard from the archway in to the living room. He's standing there looking at us “I noticed you saw us... I couldn't follow right away, I was in the middle of a story. But I came up here as soon as I could. I'm not using her Robin so don't ask that” he sits down with us taking me from Robins arms and embracing me in his “I do love her Robin and I know... Believe me I know it's weird. But this is it... she helps me sleep, she calms me down when the memories of those days take over. She's my 'Running up that hill' Robin”

“Oh shit... that strong ey? Well... I have no idea what you think I might be able to do for you two when it comes to Steve. But...” she draws a deep breath “who am I to question love right? I'm happy for you, just need to wrap my head around this a bit before I can be really happy. Ok?” she says and gives us a smile “But as far as this night goes... maybe try to not be so obvious, I'm not the only one here with half a brain.”

“Noted Buckley, I'll do my best not looking to much at her. And you” he looks down at me “try not to eat me with your eyes anymore, damn distracting” he gives me a quick kiss and helps me up from the floor

“Ok, I can try. But don't look so fucking scrumptious then” I say and punch his arm playfully

“Ok like... pulling at the heartstrings fucking sweet... God!” Robin chuckles and gets up from the floor “Ok, you go down first Munson, be the guest of honor again. We'll hang back a little up here and we'll be down shortly” Eddie nods squeezes my hand and leaves us

“Come sit with me” Robin says and we sit down on the couch. She looks at me “Hailey, how much has he told you about what happened?”

“Nothing really, he says he can't yet.” I tell her, she nods

“I get that, and how much do you know from Steve?”

“He hasn't gone in to heavy details, I know parts I guess. I haven't considered them to be true until... well until I saw the scars Rob.”

“Ok, this is really his thing to tell. And I do hope he finds it in him to do so some day. But what he went through no person ever should have to endure. He almost died there in Dustin's arms. For how long he was unconscious I don't think we'll ever know. All I know is when we found him, alive... He was a skeleton, a walking shadow of his former self. He'd survived of what little he could find that didn't make him violently ill, his wounds were badly infected. He was burning up and he was delirious. I've never seem anything in that bad shape, not in any photo from history. The closest might be the poor victims of the holocaust. I have no idea if time worked the same there as it did for us, he didn't know himself if he'd been wandering trying to find a way back for a week or close to 7 months. But for him to say that you're his 'Running up that hill' that means he sees you as his salvation Hailey, that small sentence from his lips made me change my mind about the two of you. It was that fast sweetie. If that's what you are to him then this is it, you're forever.”

I feel tears running down my face, I can't imagine what he went through. I try to speak “ What does it mean Rob?”

“When Vecna went after Max we figured out that a song or a sound that you had strong feelings towards could help get you free from his grasp. That's why in every photo you see from that year she's wearing her Walkman. She was constantly listening to music, it calmed her mind. But when Vecna attacked her we had to find a song, Lucas remembered her saying 'Running up that hill' was her favorite so we tried that. It helped set her free...that time. So that's what that means Hailey, you help calm his mind and set him free from the hold I guess Vecna still has on him. If you're saving him I don't think there is a single person down there that would be against your relationship, not even Steve. That's how strong of an impact that has on us that lived through it” she takes my hand and looks me in the eyes “Thank you for saving him Hailey” she hugs me hard and I cry again.

We sit like this for a little while, I calm myself so we can join the party again.

Around 2 am everyone says their good byes and leave. Only Eddie hangs around, he looks out the window

“Well I guess I should try and find a cab? I'm sure as hell not driving myself” he chuckles

“The hell you are, you're staying here. You can sleep on the couch. No such thing as a cab in Hawkins this time of night” dad laughs

“Dad, he can't sleep on that couch, it's too short for him. Eddie can have my bed I'll take the couch” I say and smile

“Hmm... well I guess you're right sweetheart. So then Ed, up the stairs first door on your left”

“This ok Hailey? I mean I don't want to intrude” Eddie looks at me quickly

“Yeah it's fine. I've slept on that couch before. I know I fit...you won't” I say and he chuckles

“Ok, well thank you then. Good night I guess. Awesome party Steve, and thank you Nancy” Eddie beams at us all. Nancy wraps her arms around him

“Thank you for coming home Eddie” she gives him a quick kiss on the cheek “I'm going to bed too, how about you two?” she says and looks at me and dad

“Yeah I'm beat I'll be right behind the two of you” dad says. They all head up the stairs and I go to the bathroom and wash off my makeup and take a brush to my hair. I don't think it'll do me any good sleeping with it like this. Then I go to the cupboard in the hall and get a pillow and a blanket. I lie down on the couch and make myself comfortable. I fall asleep quite fast but I'm woken up by the unmistakable sounds of nightmares from upstairs. I can't help myself I head up the stairs. I get up there and I see dad in the door to their bedroom, he looks at me and nods.

“You go to him sweetheart. I overheard you and Robin, if that's what you are to him I'm not going to argue. But we'll talk tomorrow right?” he says I run up and hug him

“Yes we will, thank you dad”

“It's fine honey, but please go help my friend now he's in pain” I hear dads voice is about to break I don't think  he understood how bad it was. I hurry in to my room and I see Eddie is in some real distress. I crawl down beside him and I do as I've done quite a few times by now. I wrap my arms around him and I rock him an hum in his ear for a bit. Then I start talking in my calmest voice

“I'm here Ed, it's ok they can't get you. I'll keep you safe. Wake up Eddie you're with me they can't hurt you anymore I won't let them” I suddenly remember something Dustin told me many years ago when telling me about the fight in the Upside down. “The most metal concert in the history of the world” apparently Eddie had been playing his guitar on the roof of Wayne's old trailer. What was it he said he played... Oh yeah! I start singing to him

“End of passion play, crumbling away I'm your source of self-destruction Veins that pump with fear, sucking darkest clear Leading on your death's construction

Taste me you will see More is all you need Dedicated to How I'm killing you

Come crawling faster Obey your master”

He jerks awake and stares at me then he breaks down in tears as he does and I comfort him as best I can through this.

“You're here? You're really here...but what about Steve?” he sobs

“Dad knows... He's ok. I'll tell you when all of this is over. Lets try and get some sleep Ed.” I kiss him and wrap my arms tighter around him as he lays his head against my chest and sighs. We fall asleep again and as it was the last time to he sleeps the rest of the night snuggled against me. I wake up around 10. Eddie is still fast asleep. I can hear dad down in the kitchen. I decide this is as good a time as any. I wiggle free from Eddie and I get dressed and head down. Dad's at the table drinking coffee reading the paper. He looks up

“You manage to calm him?” he asks

“Yeah... I sang to him”

“I heard that 'Master of puppets' good call honey. So, why didn't you tell me?” he puts the paper away. I go get myself a cup of coffee and I join him at the table

“How would you have taken it? I mean if you hadn't heard me and Robin talking last night. If I'd just told you that I've fallen in love with your friend. A man twice my age? Would you have been ok with it?” I ask

“I can't say that I would have been. Maybe with time I would have been. I followed you and Robin the moment she dragged you away from the party. I was worried, I heard her question you if Eddie was 'the guy from the trailer park' and I felt such anger towards him. But then I heard him tell her, well you were there. I agree with Robin, the second he said you were his 'Running up that hill' every angry feeling I had evaporated. I can't fight that, so you have my blessing. But what about Wayne?” I laugh

“He figured it out early. But he asked us point blank on Friday” I say

“Smart man that one, all though I should have suspected something. Eddie was so happy when we went fishing, like as happy as he used to be before everything. His smile when you were mentioned... I should have seen it. But I was just to preoccupied with last night being successful. Now it's so clear to me I feel like a moron.”

“You've always been a moron Harrington. Why would that have changed?” Eddie comes in to the kitchen looking at us “so did I hear you right when you came in to me Hailey, he knows?”

“I know Ed, and when you referenced my daughter like that how can I be anything but supportive? Well... I guess welcome to the family, SON” dad laughs

“You're an idiot Harrington, but thanks I guess?” Eddie hugs my dad “so this is...ok?” he puts his arm around me and gives my head a kiss looking down at me smiling

“Well... Do I find it weird seeing the two of you like this? Yeah! Will it take some time getting used to? Yeah! But am I happy for you? Also yeah. Now, Ed this means you're staying I suppose?” Dad says

“Yeah, I'll be staying. Not at the trailer park though...that's still to hard. But I'll look in to getting a place in town. Been playing with the idea to open up my own business here. I noticed the only mechanic in town closed down. I might even be filling a need if I do. And I'll have my needs filled here to” he hugs me tighter dad raises his eyebrows at him “God Steve not like that. My fucked up minds needs, did you hear her singing to me? In that awful dream world I'm always in as soon as I close my eyes I could hear her singing to me, there was a light. Not like the other one... better. She's saving me Steve” his tears are falling now and he hides his face in the crease of my neck. I stare at dad and he stares at me. Not like the other light? Did he mean THE light?

“Eddie now you REALLY need to talk to me. If you're staying and we do this I need to know what I'm helping you through. Robin told me some things last night, and I cried so bad for you Ed. But I need you to talk to me, tell me your story. Please” I hug him tight and kiss his head

“Ok, tonight... I'll tell you, I'll tell you both what happened” he sighs and stands up straight again wiping the tears from his face

“You'll tell the three of us you mean?” Nancy comes up behind dad “I would never have guessed but I'm happy if you're happy honey” she looks at me smiling

“Would you mind if we invite Dustin for this? He's been carrying this guilt in his mind for over 20 years” dad says

“Guilt? About what?” Eddie looks puzzled

“For leaving you there when you weren't dead” dad says in a low voice

“I was...” is all Eddie says and we all stare at him. He's not saying anything more right now we accept that “but if that's the case sure invite him, please” he says. Dad nods and goes to call Dustin

“I don't mean to be rude but could you give me a ride to the motel now Hailey? I want to shower and change. Then I think I need to go see Wayne” he looks at me

“Of course, you want something to eat first or should we just leave?” I say

“I was just about to ask if leftovers from last night was ok as early lunch” Nancy says

“Thanks Nance, sounds good. We can eat first sweetheart.” he gives me a kiss and rubs my back

Nancy heats up the left over food from the party and we eat and talk. Both dad and Nancy agree that Eddie becoming Hawkins new mechanic would be great. Dad offers to help him find a place in town as soon as possible he also offers to lend him money if he needs it to open his business. We leave for the motel, he's silent the whole trip. I come in with him and I can't take the silence

“Eddie, sweetie. What's bothering you? Did I do something? You haven't said a word to me since before lunch.” I feel a knot forming in the pit of my stomach

He looks at me, eyes burning. He rushes at me and presses me against the wall kissing me hungrily. Not a word slips from his lips as he starts to undress me all the while kissing my lips, my neck down my chest. Gripping one breast in his hand and licking, biting and sucking at the other one. He kneels in front of me kissing down my belly. He unzips my pants and pulls them down taking my panties with them. He plants his face against my pussy letting his tongue find it's way in between my folds with a frenzy I haven't felt before. My knees go weak, I need to lie down.

“Bed Eddie” I pant and he stands up and swoops me off my feet and carries me to the bed. He undresses in front of me staring at me with those intense brown eyes. He crawls up and lies down on top of me

“Can I?” he murmurs and I feel him against my pussy ready to enter. I nod, I'm always ready for this man. He pushes himself inside of me with a groan. He's holding my face in his hands kissing me deeply as he fucks me. “I love you, I love you, I love you... so fucking much” he says in a husky low voice he gets up on his knees and starts fucking me with longer deeper thrusts. His thumb finds my clit and I moan loudly at the sensation it sends through me. “Come on me babe, give it to me” he growls and it doesn't take long for me to feel that tension releasing from inside of me and sends me over the edge.

“Fuuuuck Eddiiiieeeeee” I scream as I come, he grunts and picks up the pace fucking me like a jackhammer then he thrusts in one last time hard to the hilt and I feel him filling me with his warm cum.

“Hailey...fuck Hailey...” he groans as the last drops leave him and he slumps down on top of me

“I'm sorry” he's crying?

“You're sorry for making me come?” I don't understand a thing

“I'm sorry for being quiet, but knowing I had to tell you all the fucked up shit that happened scared me to silence. Then when you were standing there looking at me I just was filled with this enormous rush of love and pure lust I couldn't stop myself. No you did nothing, you're just too good for me. I just wanted to feel this feeling once more in case after you hear everything you go running from me.” I feel his tears getting my chest wet

“Why on Gods green earth would I go running if you tell me about your demons? Don't you get that I love you Eddie? I want to help you in any and every way I'm able to.” I'm stroking his hair as I speak “Besides... I have this tiny confession to make Ed”

He looks at me through tear drenched eyelashes

“Yeah?”

“Well... when I came to tidy up at Wayne's before I picked him up from the hospital, you know when you and dad were out fishing...”

“Yeah I remember... it was literally on Thursday. I'm not that old babe” he smiles

“Funny... But I kind of found something in your bag as I was putting the things you used on me back in there” he tenses up I can see it “I found the photos Ed...and I'm sorry but my curiosity got the better of me” I sigh

“I was going to show you... I just didn't know how to show you...all of them. Because by the look of you, you found them ALL?” he says and looks at me

“Yes Ed, I found them all... I nearly missed the most important one. But I saw the edge of it as I was putting the album back and I had to look. Eddie... I am so sorry you had to go through that” I cry now remembering the photo and how it made me feel that day. He gets up and walks over to his bag taking out the album.

“I was planning on taking this with me tonight, to show you then. So you'd have a tiny idea what it was like... The rest of them probably won't ever forget what I looked like when they found me” he says in a hushed strained voice. He opens the album from the first page

“She was very pretty, did you love her?” I ask looking down at the photo of Chrissy

“No, I mean I'd liked her for years but she didn't pay me that kind of attention so it was more admiration from afar. That night it all started I thought we had a moment in the woods as she met me there to buy drugs. But I never had the chance to figure that out. Like an hour later she was dead and I was running...” he says softly. He turns the pages and we make small talk over the photos of the gang.

“Max and Lucas were really cute together” I say

“Yeah freaking adorable... Too bad that ended badly” he says “I can tell they still have feelings but they're just SO fucking stubborn these days to even mention it. When I wasn't sneaking looks at you at the party I was watching them. They were doing the same...” Eddie smiles

“No wonder they never seem to find long lasting relationships” I say “but then again going through what they did...back then I guess that fucked them up somewhat like you” I look at Eddie and I kiss him

“Yeah... Lucas told me at the hospital when I came back that Max was still in a coma then, I didn't visit her before I left. I feel so bad about that but I just couldn't see what Vecna did to her, knowing  what he did to me. Anyway Lucas didn't know if she'd ever wake up. He was heartbroken” Eddie tells me pulling me closer “last one” he sighs and pulls out the photo hidden in the binding of the album.

I brace myself  to see that again, see the torn flesh of the man I love... I flinch when he puts it in my hands. “There it is... the ugly truth behind the nightmares. I won't talk too much about it now... I don't want to talk about it twice” he says and I see that he can't look at it. I look down and I study the horrifying image...

“I still can't believe you survived Eddie... I am so happy you did but ...I don't get how” I whisper

“Me neither...” he takes the photo and puts it back

“Why do you keep it when it makes you feel so bad you can't look at it?” I ask

“I don't know... It's like a reminder...that no matter how bad off I've been traveling around it will never be this bad ever again, never look at it though. Haven't in like at least 15 years” he says

“Eddie... Since you don't want to talk about this more than this time. Bring Wayne along... I think he needs to hear it. I'm going to ask Robin to come to.” I say and he nods

“Yeah, I was thinking about taking Wayne with me, he deserves to hear it. He only knows what little your dad's told him over the years” he sighs and looks over at the clock on the wall. “we better leave sweetheart. Meet you at yours in a couple of hours” he kisses me “thank you for telling me about the photos, made it easier for me” we get up, get dressed and then we leave our separate ways

I go to Robin's and I knock on the door

“Come on in” I hear

I open the door “Hey Rob” I say as I enter

“Sweetie! How's everything after last night?” she hugs me

“Oh well...y'know... out. Dad heard us” I say and she goes pale

“Steve was listening to us? Oh god sweetie I'm so sorry...how did he take it?” she sits down and pats the couch next to her and I sit down

“He didn't tell me until this morning. Eddie slept in my bed, he had one of his nightmares I ran up... not thinking. Dad was waiting, told me to go to him. Then this morning he said exactly what you said Rob, that it was Eddie telling you that I was his song that made dad ok with it” I let the tears trickle down my face but these are happy tears “So... Eddie is finally opening up tonight, telling us what he went through before you found him. You wanna come?” I ask

“He's... telling us?” she starts crying “Oh I wouldn't miss it for the world... I want to be there for him...and you. I have a strong feeling this will be scarring for us all” she sniffles “We leaving now?” I nod “Ok give me minute I need to change” she runs off in to her bedroom. She comes back and we leave for home. We get there and we go in, Dustin's already there.

“Hey Dusty” Robin hugs him

“Hey Rob, can you believe he's finally talking to us. I wonder what's changed” he says and gives a sad smile

“Oh I have a good idea” dad says coming in to the living room with coffee “You guys want a cup?” he asks “yeah and welcome Rob I figured she's ask you that's why I didn't call” he says and gives me a hug

“Hey dad, yeah coffee would be great” I say “but I can go get it, you...talk” I say

“What do you mean you have a good idea Steve?” I hear Dustin ask as I leave to get me and Robin some coffee. Nancy's standing in the kitchen preparing food for us for later

“Hey sweetie, what's wrong? You look worried” she says

“I think dad's telling Dustin” I say

“Oh well he'll be happy for you....once the initial shock dies down” she says petting my arm

“WHAT?” I hear from the living room, I stare at Nancy. Then I hear footsteps coming towards the kitchen

“Are they shitting me right now Hailey?” Dustin's standing in front of me staring at me. I've never ever been afraid of Dustin. But now I feel so small in his presence, all I can do is shake my head at him. He looks at me, then at Nancy who's looking at him anxiously. There is silence for about a minute, then he throws himself around my neck hugging me “Thank you for saving him...thank you for getting him to stay. Not to say I don't find it weird but if this means he's happy I'm all for it” he hugs me even tighter

“Thank you Dustin” I say “but please you're crushing me here” I giggle

“Oh...sorry” he lets go, but keeps his hands on my arms looking at me “he's good to you? Not just using you to fight the demons?” he's like a concerned big brother or uncle

“He is” I say and smile at him. “Lets get back to dad and Robin, I did promise her coffee” I say

“Yeah, how about you Nance, need any help?” Dustin looks at her she's calmed down now stirring the pots again

“Nah all under control Dustin, but thank you. Ever the gentleman” she smiles “did I ever tell you this one had a big crush on me growing up” she winks at me

“REALLY Dustin... Wow, told dad about this?” I tease

“Shut up, the pair of you. I didn't have crush Nance... I was just being nice to my best friends sister... S'all...” he turns a light shade of pink

“Yeah of course 'Hey Nance there's pizza if you want some, Hey Nance can I get you anything from the kitchen, Hey Nance how was school'... Dustin darling c'mon” Nancy laughs. He scoffs and leaves us in the kitchen giggling “Told you he'd be fine with it” she says “We all are... I told Mike when I spoke to him today. He sends his love said it was about time someone got through to Eddie”

“Oh... tell him thank you” I say as I pour me and Robin some coffee. I leave the kitchen and join the rest in the living room. I set the mug down in front of Robin and I take a set. We talk, I tell them about the photos and how I found them on Thursday.

“Oh... I remember taking that photo” Robin sighs “I couldn't wrap my head around what I was seeing so I took it so I'd never forget. Well you saw it... I never did forget even without it” she mumbles “I thought it was long gone, didn't know he had it” she looks at dad

“Yeah, I told him about it when he was in the hospital. He wanted it... so I kind of stole it when I was over one night. I thought he needed it more...as you said once you saw that you'd never forget” dad looks down and I see him touching his right side. I know he has a scar there, I'd seen it. But I never realized it was similar to Eddies.

“Dad... You never told me about that” I say and nod towards his hand, he looks down. His hand moves away

“Yeah...they're the same. I was the first one attacked when we went in to the... What was it you called it Dustin?” he looks over at Dustin

“The Watergate...” Dustin smiles “I thought I was being funny, but none of these idiots appreciated my wit” he looks at me smiling

“ANYWAY” dad smiles “we went in the the Watergate, I was first to land on the other side. I was instantly attacked by the bats. They ripped a big hunk of flesh from me. Luckily Nancy is a fierce fighter, as well as this one here” he says taking Robins hand “they came in right after me swinging as they landed. Getting those awful creatures off me. They patched me up as good as they had the means to. Eddie came in after us just seconds after.”

“Yeah those were some vicious fucking flying rats” we'd all been listening to dad so intensely we hadn't heard Eddie and Wayne arrive through the front door. I run up and I hug Wayne tight and then I kiss Eddie.

“Hey” I whisper “you ready for this?” I look in to his warm brown eyes

“Nope... but it needs to be told” he says coarsely taking my hand. Wayne has already gone in and sat down with Robin on the couch. Everyone telling him how glad they were hearing his good news. He blushes

“Oh... y'all to nice to this old bag 'o bones” he grunts. I sit down with him hugging him

“There's a lot of love for this old bag 'o bones around these parts” I say he smiles at me

“Apparently y'all crazy...must be something in the water” he pats my leg

Eddie sits down in the chair opposite the couch, giving him center stage.

“Feels like you should have had your old throne from Hellfire” Dustin smiles

“Ha that thing... God I'd forgotten about that” Eddie chuckles

“He had a THRONE?” I ask

“Yup his majesty over here needed to look the part of dm. All about appearances back then” Dustin chuckles

“Yeah right, I did have a big ego back then. Needed a big chair to fit both me and it” Eddie smiles

“You want anything Ed? Coffee, water, beer... a whiskey?” Dad gets up

“A whiskey for courage and then water I think. Thanks man” Eddie says and dad nods leaving for the kitchen.

“Sooo... everyone in the loop or?” Eddie looks at me “I mean you did kiss me when I came in so I kinda figured” he smiles at me

“Yeah... we're all in the loop now” Robin says reaching over taking Eddies hand squeezing it

“You do realize that if you ever hurt her I'm going to have to beat you up” Dustin looks at Eddie frowning

“You... beat me up Henderson? Sweetest kid ever? I hardly think so... on the other hand that's who I'm worried about” he says pointing at Robin “I have no intention of ever hurting Hailey so don't worry. I intend to cherish her for the rest of my life” he smiles at me and I feel a warmth spreading through me.

“Yeah you better worry about me Munson... I'm told I'm a lunatic...” Robin winks at him

”So nothing's really changed in 20 years then?” he chuckles at her. Dad comes back with Nancy. He hands Eddie the whiskey and a water bottle. They sit down and Eddie takes the whiskey in one gulp.

“I don't mean this to be dramatic, but could we turn of the lights and turn down the blinds?” Eddie sighs “I can't deal with both talking and seeing you all. I'm sorry. I'll know you're here but I need to be in my own head for this” he says

Dad and I get up and we make the room dark for him. I sit down next to Wayne again, taking his hand in mine.

“The last thing I remember is telling Henderson I didn't run away this time, to take care of the little sheep for me... Did I say anything else to you?” he asks out into the darkness

“You said ' I think I'm actually gonna graduate... I think this is my year Henderson... it's finally my year. I love you man' then you were gone” I hear Dustin's voice

“Yeah... then there was darkness. I could hear you say you loved me too. Thank you man. But then there was a light...you know you read about that thinking it's all bull. But here it was, this warm amazing light, I went for it. I'll never forget what that felt like, warm...welcoming. Then I heard a voice, I think it was mum... I recognized it you see. It told me I couldn't be there, I wasn't supposed to be there. Someone was to come in the future and I was needed there for them. Starting to think now that the voice was talking about you Hailey” I'm sobbing already “then there was just darkness again. So Dustin man, you needn't have any guilt for leaving me there thinking I was dead. I was...for a while at least” he pauses and we hear Dustin sniffle “Then there was nothing but darkness again, slowly I began to hear sounds, feel the ground beneath me and the pain. Oh my god the pain. I woke up on the ground in the trailer park I grew up in, but it wasn't right it was distorted, ugly, moldy...you know what it looked like. At first I couldn't remember a thing. What the hell happened, where was I? I mean I knew where I was but not... I can't explain it. I tried to move and I screamed, I remember the searing pain all over my upper body. I'd been laying there long enough for the blood to have dried and stuck me to the ground. I had to rip myself off the ground like a big fucking band aid. The blood started flowing again from the wounds on the sides” we hear him touching the sides of his body “I managed to sit up and have a look around, memories coming back to me. Flooding my mind, playing the guitar on the roof, fighting of the bats getting in to the trailer, then deciding to be a fucking hero. The biting...oh god the sounds as they tore in to my flesh, there is no way I can explain that. Then the silence before you were at my side Dustin. All these memories coming back to me, the panic not knowing of all of you or any of you made it. I looked over towards the trailer assessing if I could make it in there. I crawled, dragged myself over there. I have no idea how long it took me to get from where you left me Dustin to the trailer. Might have been an hour might have been a day. I don't even know for how long I was dead, or how long I was out before waking up. But I did get there eventually, I managed to get myself standing by dragging my beaten ass up the railing to the stairs. I get inside and I see the gate is open, but there is no way in hell I'm getting up there. This is where I'm almost giving up. I cry...you have no idea how much I cried there and then. I knew no one would come to the trailer and see me until maybe it was too late.  I dragged myself in to the bedroom and I crawled on to the bed, hugging my guitar that I found in the hallway. It was my comfort, I have no idea how long I lay there for. I think it might have been close to a week. I sucked the fucking dirty water from the surroundings. Knowing water was the most important thing if I wanted to live. Took me long enough to realize this was the same as our world just...sickly. So I dragged myself out in to the kitchen and looked in the cupboards. There was canned stuff there, just like the real thing. I made a decision to try, that's probably what kept me alive. I tried whatever I could find from then on, small bites making sure I wasn't feeling ill from it” he stops to take a sip of water, we're all crying quietly now. The sniffles tell on us “I slept most of the time, fever raging through me. I had nothing to try and clean myself with so I just figured I'd die there from the infection. But that voice from the light...telling me I was needed. That must mean I was supposed to live. One day it hit me, that idea we had. There was to be a portal at each kill site. I knew I couldn't reach this one. The lake one was out in the fucking open and I hadn't a clue if the bats were still around, didn't wanna fuck around and find out. So I decided to go for the least obvious one, the one on the road where Fred was killed. Only problem...you didn't say what road it was Nancy. So I made a map in my head from what I could remember you telling me. He'd gone missing between Mrs Nolan's trailer and Max's so in to those woods meaning it either had to be the road leading to the lab or the road leading out of town. I decided to try for the one leading towards the lab first, it was shorter. If I didn't find anything there I'd turn around and head for the other road. It took me another couple of days to even get out of the trailer. Once outside again I decided to go through the closest trailers to see if I could find anything useful and maybe some more canned food. I heard them as I left the trailer...the bats. I've never felt fear like that since. I hid under the trailer for a day or two just shaking, couldn't even get myself to go inside. I just couldn't move from the fear of them finding me again, the pain as they bit in to my fresh in mind “I cry quietly squeezing Wayne's hand so hard I fear I might be cutting his circulation completely. But I can't help it hearing Eddie talk.

He's there again, in that place “I finally realize there's been no sound of them for a day or so. Then I crawl back out trying to get up. I head in to the nearest trailer, I found a couple of cans of I think it was like beans or something. Also I find a crutch leaning against a wall...like it was waiting there for me. I take it and instantly the moving around part eases up a bit. When I get out there again I see the spear I made and the shield on the ground next to where I died. I pick up the spear...thinking I might need it. More things than flying horrors around there, I knew that much from what you told me. I start the agonizing journey towards where I hoped Fred was killed. I have no idea how long this took me, I don't even know if time moved slower or faster for me than for you. I was told it was 7 months right? That I was gone?” Dad agrees coarsely “ok well I have no clue. To me it felt like long fucking days. The light is always the same, no change in day or night. I hid under fallen trees, rocks whatever I could find when I needed to sleep. Which was often. The infection spreading in me, I could feel it. I was beginning to hallucinate. I saw Chrissy waving me along, she was skipping along the path a head of me arms locked with Patrick. I saw all of you, dead hung up in the trees. I cried a lot, not knowing if this was real, if it was the fever or if it might even be Vecna. I struggle now, my breathing isn't good anymore. The pain is blinding me and the wounds ooze making me stick to things and smell awful. If the bats and the other things didn't hear me they sure as hell would be bale to smell me. The last thing I remember seeing before waking up in that hospital bed is a red light and you two” he points towards dad and Nancy “In my mind I wasn't actually seeing YOU I was seeing a figment of my imagination. All I wanted then was to see you, but there was no way my mind could register that you were there. I did try and stab you didn't I? Or is that some nightmare thing my mind made up?”

Now there's' tears falling from every eye in the room.

“No...you did. Try to stab us with hat spear of yours. Cursing us, telling us to leave you the hell alone you needed o get back home. It wasn't until you fought long enough for your body to give up that we could really make sure it WAS you. We were all in shock Ed. Imagine going back to that hell with the sole intention to bring your dead body back so we could all get closure, and finding you alive. At first we also thought it was Vecna playing with our minds. But he was gone, we all knew that. So there was no doubt in our minds that it was you, even though I've never seen anything look as horrible...or smell as horrible before or since” dad smiles a little “We heard you still have that photo Rob took of you once you finally passed out and we could fix a makeshift gurney for you?”

“Yeah I have it... I never look at it anymore but I can't get rid of it either. When things have gotten real bad throughout the years I hold it, always looking away but knowing it's there. It reminds me that it will at least NEVER be that bad again. Hadn't looked at it until Hailey asked me about it, telling me she saw it the week I came here. I've saved pictures of us all from back then. I brought it with us in case you want to have a look” I can tell by his voice he's smiling now.

“I would love that!” I hear Robin say “Not the photo of you...no love for that but the rest of them”

“Well...now you know. The things nightmares are made of...” Eddie sighs “It feels like a weight lifted somehow, telling you this. I mean I don't even think I could convey what it was really like with words but you have an idea now at least. If there is a hell... it can't be worse than that place. The only one I think might have even a slight chance of really understanding this is Max...but yeah well. You can turn on the lights again, I'm ok now" Eddie says and dad gets up turning on the lights and opening the blinds. Everyone has been crying, red eyes all around. Everyone gets up and gives Ed a hug. This is when we see that sometime after we turned the lights out and Eddie began telling his story Max and Lucas had snuck in. They're standing inches apart holding hands crying.

"I do get it Eddie, I do. Hell is probably a walk in the park compared to that place. I could sense you...in there when I was gone. I felt your pain in my mind, I felt you dying Eddie. Then I felt you coming back to, happiness flooded my mind. I kept wishing that I could wake up and tell them all, I knew they were there you see, even if I wasn't awake. I wanted to tell them you survived and that they needed to find you. By the time I was awake you were gone so I never told them" Max's tears stream down her face as everyone watches her in silence. Eddie gets up and he wraps his arms around her

"Hey Red, feels good knowing someone kept an eye on me. Maybe you're the one who got me through it? Stop crying now, both you and I made it. Yeah we might be a bit fucked up but you know... I think we'll be just fine. We have people here who love us" he looks down at Max and Lucas's hands smiling "Just admit it and get on with your life together. It's been long enough don't you think?" the both of them blush and Lucas wraps his arms around Max whispering something in her ear and she smiles and nods. Eddie pats them both on the shoulder "There ya go, see... Old love doesn't go bad, it just evolves. Myself, I'm kind of a sucker for new love" he grins at me

The evening turns into night, no one wants to leave. We all want to hear more about what Eddie and Max went through. Especially Max since she never talked about her time in a coma, she's always said she didn't remember anything. Turns out...she lied.

Around 3 am I give up and I say good night to the ones still sitting in our living room talking. I head up to bed and I fall asleep instantly, happy for Eddie, happy for Max and Lucas and also happy for myself. I haven't slept for long when I feel Eddie crawling into bed beside me putting his arm around me and pulling me in close to him. He snuggles in to the crease of my neck and he whispers

"God I love you Hailey, thank you for getting me to do this. How can I ever repay you" he kisses my neck and lets out a content sigh and we fall asleep. I wake up at noon realizing this is probably the first night Eddie's slept the night through without even a hint at nightmares, sure he's had calm nights but there's always been some terrors sometime during the night. I smile, this was good for him. Letting all his demons go. Eddie is still holding me close, he's snoring slightly. He looks so at peace, I wiggle out of his arms carefully so I don't wake him up. I really need to use the bathroom, and I need a shower. I strip and I get in the shower, it isn't long before I can feel that I'm being watched.

"Hey, gonna stand there like a creep or are you going to join me" I say. The doors open and Eddie slides in behind me

"Wanna let me have some of that hot water babe, or am I just having this hot ass?" he kisses my neck and his hand come round to grab my tits. He starts playing with my nipples, kissing my neck all the while. I can feel him growing against my ass. I moan

"Wow, Ed...you're not wasting time are ya?" I purr as his hands trail down my front to slip in between my legs. He finds my clit and starts circling it with expertise. I'm feeling dizzy from the pleasure it sends through me combined with the hot water.

"Not a second is wasted with you babe" he whispers in my ear "would you turn around please" he continues. I turn towards him and he kisses me deeply as he lifts my legs and I wrap them around him. He pins me against the wall and he lifts me so he can position the tip of his cock right at my entrance, he lowers me and I feel him enter. Slowly filling me up as I press my legs round Eddies back trying to pull him even closer. He fucks me with deep thrusts, not saying a word just heavy breathing and soft moans. He keeps kissing me, lips, face,neck, my collarbones. I run my hands in to his hair as I feel myself closing in.

"Eddie...fuck Eddie...you're so good to me...so good. Come with me Ed, please come with me" I moan as the sweet release comes. Eddie growls from deep inside as he fills me up with one last deep thrust. My legs slide down his sides and we stand face to face kissing, water streaming over us. "I heard you when you came to bed, was just to tired to respond. I love you too Eddie, and loving me enough to let me hear you tell your story is all the payment I need" I say and look him deep in his beautiful brown eyes

"You know I'm going to ask you to marry me some day...right? Because this...this is all I need from life. I'm back, and this time I'm staying put" he gives me a kiss so full of emotion my knees wobble. Maybe he was right last night, maybe I am the person in the future he needed to survive for?

It's strange all it took was one week to completely change everything in my life. Some might call it too fast, I'm too young etc etc... But this is it, he is my past, my present and my future. I don't know what it's bringing. All I know is the Freak has returned to Hawkins and my life will never ever be the same.

END

#eddie munson #eddie munson smut #eddie x fem

[bestiesenpai]

Perfect Student - Geto Suguru

I love slimy Geto :) although i’m not sure how slimy he actually is here lol femme reader, 3k words

TW: manipulation, abuse of power(?), dubcon, biting(not a lot), spanking

You weren’t the best university student, you were willing to admit. A few classes skipped than deemed appropriate, a couple missed assignments you’d rather not think about again, and some test scores that were down right abysmal.

But you shouldn’t be failing your class completely! A string of low grades on your last few assignments was worrying you. You understood the course material just fine, yet your work was apparently not reflecting it. Making an appointment with your professor, you could only hope he’d shed some light onto the situation.

“Mr. Geto?” Knocking on his office door, you found it swung open with ease. It was late afternoon, no need for any lights to be on in his office as the large window to the side got plenty of light from the slowly setting sun.

“Ah, you’re here.” He smiled at you from behind his desk, his hair in that familiar half bun he sports. The sleeves of the button up he’d had on during class are pushed up past his elbows, revealing his taut forearms. “Take a seat.” He makes a sweeping gesture to the swanky brown leather armchair on the other side of the desk.

“Thanks.” You said quietly, stiffly sitting in the chair and avoiding his narrowed eyes looking you over. You weren’t usually so nervous, you talked up a bit in class if you knew the answer, but being here with the warmth of the sun heating half your face and your admittedly very attractive teacher staring at you, it made your heart thump harder.

“So, what did you want to talk to me about?” Geto leans forward, resting his elbows on the table and his head in his hands.

“Well sir, I’ve noticed my grades haven’t been the best recently on some of the work I’ve turned in?” You don’t mean to phrase it like a question and it makes your cheeks burn. “A-and I understand the material for this lesson pretty well, so I- so I, uh…” Losing your train of thought, you glance at Geto’s unreadable expression.

“So you came to get a better grade? Let me pull up your grades on the computer and see.” Turning to the monitor sitting on the desk corner, Geto types away. With his focus not on you, you can finally breathe a little easier. “Oh (Y/N)...” Geto tsks and it makes you worry.

“What?” Wide eyed, you lean forward to try and see what he sees.

“I’m just looking at your past grades and you’ve got quite a bit of missing work.”

“Y-yes I know but-”

“But nothing.” He says it softly but it still manages to shut you up. “Care to explain why that happened?”

Truthfully, you had no reason other than laziness. You’d missed one, then it spiraled into two, three- you’d managed to catch up before it got too bad, though, or at least so you thought. You stayed silent, eyes tracing the wood grains in the desk.

“Hm, no answer. That’s a shame.” Clicking a few things, Geto ticked a brow upwards. “Looking at your recent work, I don’t know if there’s anything you can do.”

“What?” That makes your head snap up in fear. It was only the middle of the term, surely your grade wasn’t that far gone? “Mr. Geto, what-”

“Call me Suguru, please. It’s just us here, we aren’t in class.” He cuts you off with a raise of his hand and an easy smile.

“Suguru…” You say it slowly, worrying your lip briefly. “My grade can’t be that bad already that there’s nothing I can do.”

“Take a look for yourself.” Turning the monitor towards you, Suguru’s smile got bigger seeing your devastated face. Your grade was beyond horrible, the number on the top of the screen making your stomach churn.

“But I...I just checked it for myself not too long ago. How could it have changed like that?” Leaning back in your chair in shock, thoughts spiraled in your head. Lost in your own world, you didn’t pay any attention to your teacher.

He stood up slowly, brushing down the front of his shirt as he tucked in his chair. Shuffling a few things on his desk to the side, he smoothed his hand on the empty space he created as he rounded the corner, leaning against it as he stood in front of you.

“What can I do to fix my grade?” Looking up at him, Suguru nearly cooed at the pitiful look in your eyes.

“What’re you willing to do?” His voice is staggeringly low, a mere rumble in his chest and throat. He barely speaks them properly, they just tumble forth and into your lap. You take a pause, sizing up the way your teacher takes up so much space in front of you, his arms crossed in front of his broad chest.

“What do you mean?” You know exactly what he means, you can see the slightest bulge forming in the front of his pants.

“I think you’re smart enough to figure it out.” Suguru chuckles, letting his hair out of it’s bun and draping it across his shoulders. Licking your lips nervously you stare at him, throat tightening the longer you look at the sunkissed beauty.

“Okay.” Whispering quietly, you shuffle your bag out of your lap, you begin to fiddle with your bottoms.

“Hold on, where’s the rush? We should savor this moment, hm?” Grabbing your hands, Suguru pulls you up to standing. Wrapping an arm around your waist he grabs your chin and tilts your face toward him.

He kisses you gently, getting a feel for your demeanor. The hand around your waist grips you tighter, his fingers digging in painfully and making you squirm closer to him to try and get away. Your hands clamp down onto his shoulders to steady yourself, a muffled whimper coming from you.

Suguru slips his tongue into your mouth with ease, slotting his mouth together with yours and overtaking your senses. Even with your eyes squeezed shut, you’re surrounded by his presence and overwhelmed with the energy he has just below the surface.

“S-sugu-” Your voice breaks when he leaves the kiss and moves onto your neck, nipping at the column of your throat and behind your ear.

“Sugu? That’s cute.” He chuckles while tugging the collar of your shirt down. Kissing the new skin before him, Suguru wastes no time in biting down. A sharp cry leaves you at the sudden pain, hands flying to try and push him away. “Calm down.” It’s all the warning Suguru gives you and then he’s biting you again, higher up on your neck.

Suguru sucks harshly on your neck, his teeth digging into the flesh with no remorse. Tugging on his hair, you’re worried about the marks that’ll be left behind, the ones you’ll have to explain to your friends after this meeting with your teacher.

“Take this off.” Tugging at the bottom of your top, Suguru releases you from his hold. “That too.” He mumbles when you make no move to take your bra off as well.

“Sir…” Crossing your arms over your chest, embarrassment washes over you. It was fine when you were just kissing him, but now clothes were coming off and- and did you really want to do this? Taking a look back at the monitor however, you knew this was the only option. There wasn’t any other teacher for this subject, and if you backed out now there would only be more headaches later.

“No need to be shy, little one.” Suguru chuckles and pushes away from the desk. Putting his hands on your shoulders, he guides you to take his spot, pushing you to sit on the empty space he made. Curling his fingers around your wrist, Suguru is gentle as he holds both your arms away from you.

Craning your head away, you can’t stand to see the lustful look in his eyes as they roam over your topless body. Suguru bites his lip, letting out a low whistle as he lets go of one of your arms to cup your breast.

“You’re so pretty.” He says, eyes focused on the way your nipple pebbles under his thumb. Tugging on it, Suguru chuckles when you whimper and his eyes dart up to your face. “What a nice little noise.” Standing between your legs, Suguru puts your arm around his shoulders and leans in, kissing your neck on the other side while he plays with your breasts.

Twirling the ends of his hair with your fingers, the feeling of his fingers going over your nipples makes an ashamed heat settle between your legs. Unable to clench your thighs together to relieve the building pressure, you settle for squirming on his desk.

Pushing you back to lean on your hand, Suguru takes a nipple into his mouth. He flicks it a few times with his tongue before nibbling softly, scraping his teeth against the bud as his other hands makes work with the neglected breast.

“S-sugu, please-” Vocalizing what you wanted was near impossible, especially since you shouldn’t be wanting it in the first place. But the heat between your legs was killing you, and a few tugs to the ends of his hair wrapped between your fingers got him to stand up a little straighter.

“Getting antsy?” Suguru teases with a light pink flush on his cheeks. You nod, lip caught between your teeth as your eyes go down to his now prominent bulge.

“I want it.”

“Show me what you want.” He challenges immediately, a sick grin on his face. Nodding again, the hand on his shoulder drops down to run along his chest and down to it. As you work on unbuttoning his slacks, Suguru undoes a few buttons on his shirt, exposing smooth skin that’s slightly damp with sweat.

Pulling his hard cock out, it’s hot and heavy in your palm. Pumping it slowly, the veins that run up and down the length pulse beneath your fingertips, blood rushing straight to the head of his cock where it leaks precum straight onto the floor.

Suguru is pulling your bottoms and underwear down as you stroke his cock, his nails scraping against your skin from his eagerness to have you completely bare before him. Out of the corner of your eye, you can see him pocket your underwear, but you don’t bring it up. You know you won’t be getting it back anyway.

“Look at this pretty fucking pussy.” Spreading your legs wide, Suguru practically salivates at the sight of your glistening cunt. “What a shame my pretty little student was hiding this from me for so long! I should mark you down just for that!”

“Sorry.” Chuckling bashfully, you let his cock go as Suguru tugs you closer to him, your ass beginning to hang off the edge of the desk.

“You’ll make it up to me, right?” He laughs lightly as well, grabbing your legs and putting them around his waist. “Good girl.” He hums when you nod obediently, head clouded with lust and a desire to please him.

The tip of his cock presses into you with ease, the smear of his precum and your arousal making an easy entrance. Your arms wrap around his shoulders to keep you steady as he bottoms out, a shiver running up both of your spines at the feeling.

“Fuck-” Suguru barks suddenly, drawing his hips back. “You’re milking me already, I can barely pull out.” Snapping his hips forward again, Suguru delights in the wet slap that comes from it. Beginning to rock into you, he can see the fabric of his pants staining darker from your juices, a wet patch surely forming on his desk under you as well.

Planting a hand next to you, Suguru’s back curves against his shirt as he fucks you. He had wanted to take it slow, this was only the thing he’d been working towards since classes started, but the drag of his cock against your walls was demolishing that plan.

“Sugu!” You cried, burying your face into the crook of his neck. Your breath fanning over him added to the heat washing over him, more sweat accumulating under his clothes and sticking to your face.

Hearing you moan and whine beneath him drove Suguru wild and he couldn’t help the way his other hand pulled up from your thigh and slapped back down, making you jump and tighten around him.

“My slutty little student- how naughty you are.” Slapping your thigh a few more times, Suguru pushes his hand between you and finds your clit with his thumb, rubbing it in tight circles. Choked moans came from your lips and you squeezed him tighter.

“Sugu- sir- ah, fuck-” The wet slapping sound gets louder, your slick gushing out of you at this point and coating Suguru. Lifting your heavy head, you kiss him, teeth knocking together and accidentally biting his lip as you try to slide your tongue into his mouth.

Suguru leans forward to kiss you harder, nearly making you fall over from the weight. His finger moves faster on your clit, desperate to have you cum on his cock. His orgasm is coming faster than he would have liked and he doesn’t want to cum without feeling you fall apart around him.

He ends up leaning so far forward, you really do fall back, lips breaking apart as you crumple onto the desk. Suguru pulls you forward by your hips, your ass now nearly completely off the desk as he fucks you.

“Fucking little slut- gonna make me cum-” His bottom lip is between his teeth, clamping down so hard it just might draw blood if he keeps going. Suguru’s hair tickles your skin as he moves, cascading down around you and sticking briefly to your skin.

“Please, please-” Your voice catches in your throat as you cum. No sound comes out of you, your back arching high off the desk as the pleasure finally comes to a peak.

“Fucking beautiful!” Suguru smiles like a madman, his fingers moving even faster on your clit as you rhythmically tighten around him. He kisses your slack mouth, swallows the forced gasps and moans that come from yours chest as your lungs burn for oxygen.

Slapping your ass a few times, Suguru cums inside you. Pushing his cock in as deep as possible he grinds himself against you, pushing a long, low groan into your mouth as he does. The hand on your cunt drops away, wrapping wet and sticky fingers around your thigh as he moves away from your mouth to breathe.

“What a...what a good student I have.” He sighs, running a hand through his hair as he catches his breath. Letting your legs fall slack, Suguru pushes a hand on your bladder to feel himself slide out of you.

As his cock leaves you, there’s a dribble of his cum that follows, staining your cunt white and dripping down between the crack of your ass and to the floor. Rubbing a hand on your thigh, Suguru gathers the cum dripping out and pushes it back in.

“Shouldn’t waste any now.” He hums, tracing his fingers up and down your cunt.

“T-too much.” You whine pathetically, trying in vain to grab his hand and stop him. Catching your hand in his, Suguru relents and threads his fingers through yours. The gesture is sweet, even more so when he kisses the back of your hand.

“Such a sweet student I have, wanting to hold my hand.” You giggle at the sentiment, cheeks getting warmer the longer he looks at you with that smile on his face. “Let’s hope you can keep this up for the rest of the term, and maybe I won’t fail you.”

Of course this wouldn’t be a one time thing. Suguru intended to milk this opportunity for all he could, already planning on having you stay after his lesson so he can play with your cunt before his next class.

“Go ahead and get dressed.” Helping you sit up, Suguru untangled himself from you and grabbed a few tissues, putting them in your hand as he started fixing himself up. The sun had gone down even farther during your little escapade, no longer baking the room in warm orange light. It left only a dim, cool glow now, and the heat it provided you was quickly leaving your body along with the sweat evaporating on your skin.

“If you want to keep your grade up, I think we should keep meeting regularly to discuss your progress.” Suguru had his teaching voice on now that he was leading you out of his office ten minutes later, your panties stuffed into his back pocket. There were a few other people passing by in the hall, some giving quick waves to the two of you as they saw you.

“Okay, Mr. Geto.” You knew to play the part well, not wanting to arouse suspicion by calling him by his first name. No one in your class called him Suguru, and especially not Sugu.

“Glad you understand.” He patted your shoulder quickly, giving you a cheeky wink when no one was looking. “I look forward to seeing you in class tomorrow, (Y/N).” Giving your arm a brief squeeze, he sent you on your way. Turning back to his office, he closed the door and locked it, going back to his desk and laying your panties across his lap.

Pulling out his phone, he snapped a few pictures of your underwear, sniffing it briefly before putting it back in his pocket.

“Professor Satoru is gonna love this.”

#jujutsu kaisen #geto suguru #geto x reader #geto suguru smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen fanfic #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jujutsu kaisen scenarios

[havethetimeofyourstyles]

in which harry stumbles across your livestream.

a/n: alright lovelies! here is my submission for bificathon hosted by my two lovely friends @bopbopstyles & @harrysclementines !! my prompt is ‘harry accidentally stumbles upon a livestream of her and her friend’ and let me tell you, I SNATCHED THIS SO QUICK! its my first time writing gxg smut, so pls be nice :’). also september is bi awareness month, so happy bi month babies! you’re so all beautiful and valid <3

enjoy 4k words of bi/camgirl!yn x roommate/best friend!harry filled with girl x girl smut/filth

come into my inbox and send feedback and let’s talk about this!

pls rb to share! <3

It was Harry’s usual Thursday night when he found himself lying in his bed with his laptop on his lap and a plate of his dinner in his hands. 

He was binge watching interior home designers on Netflix, letting out an ‘ooh’ and ‘ahh’ as they revealed the finished homes, practically envisioning his future home the same way. 

Thursday nights were practically the start of his weekend as he didn’t have classes on Fridays, and usually his friends and him would hang out, but he really just didn’t feel like going out nor did he have the social capacity to hang out and get drunk when he’s probably going to do that on Friday and Saturday. 

He simply just wanted a break, and that included staying inside and watching interior designers flip a house completely different, and eating his dinner. And he wasn’t ashamed that he enjoyed it. 

After a few episodes and an empty plate, Harry paused the next episode before it even started to put his plate away and grab a glass of water. As he was washing his plate, he heard the door open and close, followed by hushed giggles and whispers. 

“Shh. Harry might be asleep,” a voice said, but he knew it was you. You knew that he liked to sometimes sleep early, but he thought it was too early to be asleep, seeing as it was only eight p.m. 

“I’m actually in here,” he chuckled, making himself present with his voice. 

“Oh!” You said surprisingly, and another laugh was heard. 

You made your way to the kitchen, your guest following behind you as you saw Harry in just a pair of boxers and a t-shirt. 

“Hey, H,” you greeted. 

“Hi, love. Have fun tonight?” He asked. You had went to the bar to chill out from the many essays you had to write and exams you had to take, and Thursday nights were also a start to your weekend as well, so fuck it. 

“Yeah, I did, thanks for asking. This is Daniela, by the way,” you introduced the girl you had met at the bar. 

You had seen Daniela right when you walked in as her and her friends were sitting at the table right next to the entrance, and she immediately caught your eye. She looked right back at you, giving you some flirty eyes herself as you were dragged away by your friends and straight to the bar. 

After a few drinks and rounds of dancing with your best girlfriends, you saw Daniela walk over to the bar and order some drinks, so you decided that it was your chance to go up to her. 

You two had immediately hit it off, getting to know one another. She told you that she was a lesbian, and you proudly told her that you were bisexual. You also found out that you’re both in the same bio-chem class together, which definitely raised the excitement as she suggested studying together and you happily said yes. Then there was dancing while you two were both buzzed, completely forgetting your friends as you grinded against each other and kissed, not caring that you were practically putting on a show for everyone around you. 

And when you suggested that you took her home, she immediately said yes, and you dragged her outside as you waited for the Uber you called. 

“Nice to meet you, Daniela. I’m Harry,” he introduced himself, shaking her hand. “Her roommate and friend-”

“Best friend. C’mon, Harry, don’t put yourself lower than that,” you corrected and he smiled. 

“Alright, alright. My bad,” he laughed. 

“So, we’re gonna go to my room,” you winked him as Harry said ‘have fun’ before cleaning up a bit in the kitchen. 

He was glad that one of you was getting laid. He also noticed how happy you were, which he absolutely adored, and he thinks it has to do with the fact that you came out a year ago, and you’re now living your life to the fullest and happiest, and that’s all he wants; is for you to be happy with yourself and in general.

Harry met you at the end of freshman year of college as your friend groups met up with each other at a bar. He was a bit more shy than the rest of his friends, and didn’t immediately mingle with everyone until a few drinks in. But as you introduced yourself to his friends, you noticed him sitting down at the bar, not interacting with anyone. You were also somewhat on the quiet side, but was able to handle introducing yourself, so you completely understood why Harry acted the way he did when you two met. 

“Hey, not feeling it tonight?” You asked, taking a seat next to him. 

“Eh, not one for going up to people and initiating a conversation,” he said nervously. 

“I get that. Makes me nervous to go up to someone and talk to them, but I’m trying to get over that, so here’s me trying,” you chuckled as did he. 

“Well, we gotta drink to that then,” he said, and it took him by surprise that he was able to make a joke and laugh. 

It could have definitely been the liquid courage, but he was starting to warm up to you; joking around and becoming less tense as you two talked and drank. But that was because you were making him comfortable, to which he appreciated very much. 

Since then, you two have been by each other’s side. He told you that your friends kind of intimidated him because they were very out there, and that made you laugh slightly because it was very true, but you made sure to be by his side whenever your groups hung out. 

The group hangouts turned into one-on-one hangouts with just you and Harry. He was definitely more comfortable with you, and he really enjoyed your company and presence. 

Both of your friends had expected you two to end up together, but you two realized that you were better off as friends—who knows if you two will end up together, but for now, you were happy being best friends with him as was he. 

It was a year, the end of sophomore year, when you wanted to move out of the dorms. It wasn’t like you didn’t like your friends and roommates, but sometimes you wanted your own space and that didn’t help when there’s two other people in the same room as you. 

So Harry suggested that you both find a flat together since he was on the lookout for a flat anyways, and it’ll help him a ton with bills and whatnot. You excitedly said yes after you asked him if he was sure that he wanted to move in with you, and if he was extra sure that he wanted to since you’d be there when he would take home people. He laughed, and said that he didn’t care and wanted to live with you, saying it’ll be fun. You both had gotten quite close throughout that year and practically told each other everything, so it’ll be even better to live with someone you both trust. 

Junior year of uni, he noticed that you always came home with a sad frown on your face, briefly saying hi to him before going straight to your room and locking yourself up for hours. Harry tried figuring out why you were in such a mood all the time, and tracked his steps, seeing if he said anything wrong that made you upset. But he couldn’t figure it out as you both always had light and fun conversations during breakfast and dinner. 

And the frown went on for months until you both came back from Christmas break, and you told him that you had to tell him something very important. 

“Love, you can tell me anything, you know that right?” He said, reassuring you. 

“Yeah. It’s just…I’m nervous to,” you said, shaking your leg. Harry really wondered what happened during break that made you so anxious. He was worried that you wanted to move out and not live with him anymore, but he had to remind himself that it was probably not even about him as he told you to take your time. 

“Don’t worry. I’ll be here when you’re ready,” he said, and you nodded, giving him a smile before you walked off to your room to gather your thoughts. 

An hour later, you came out of your room and found Harry sitting on the couch, watching a film. You sat next to him, and he immediately turned off the TV, giving you his full attention.

You took a deep breath and started, “What I was trying to say earlier was that something about me has changed, and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you when I was still figuring it out, but I was just scared of what you would think,” you said. Harry started to get concerned, but he let you finish talking before he said anything. “So, I’ve always had an attraction towards girls, and I thought it was just me thinking a girl was pretty, but when I started to get nervous and flustered when a girl would talk to me, I realized that I really like them, and I would find myself flirting with them and longing to have something romantic with them. And then when I went back home for break, I met up with a childhood friend, and somehow…we kissed. It was so magical that it made my stomach flutter.” 

Harry had smiled softly as you told your story; knowing where this conversation was going, but of course, he stayed silent and let you talk. 

“So what I’m trying to tell you is that… I’m bi,” you had said nervously, hands shaking in your lap. You were trying to contain your tears from falling from your face as you shook your leg. 

“Love, I’m so happy for you,” he replied, opening his arms to comfort you from the anxiety you were feeling from telling him. You had softly sobbed into his shoulder, feeling the weight on your shoulders disappear as you had finally told the person you were closest to and who you trust the most. 

“R-Really?” You said as you pulled away from his hold. 

“Of course! Why wouldn’t I be? I’m happy that you can be whoever you want to be and I’m here to support you,” he said, holding your arms and running his hands over your skin. 

“Thank you, Harry,” you smiled at him, feeling ultimately grateful for your best friend and his acceptance. 

Harry smiled at the memory as he heard giggles through your door, and he chuckled as he finished cleaning before heading to his room. He was feeling a bit tired and despite it being a bit earlier than his usual bedtime, he decided to call it a night a try to get some sleep, deciding that he could go on a run in the morning since he was sleeping early. 

But after an hour of tossing and turning, he gave up trying to get a restful sleep, and opened his laptop to put on some Netflix, hoping it would lull him into a deep slumber. He was comfortably watching a random show until his hand grazed his crotch, and he realized he hadn’t relieved himself nor had he had sex in a while. 

So, he pushed his boxers down his legs, kicked them off the bed, and took off his shirt before he grabbed some lube and pumped his cock as it immedately hardened in his hand. He began touching himself in the darkness of his room as he quietly groaned out and threw his head back on his pillow. 

Realizing he doesn’t have some kind of visual, he stops to search up cam girl sites on the internet so he can get a mental image in his head to get him off. He finally settled on one user that was doing a live stream called ‘KISSYPLS’ as the preview was a girl going down on another with a purple ambiance to the room. The room was dark, but not dark enough where he couldn’t see the two girls. 

The sound of the moans from his laptop were quite loud and he didn’t want you to hear it all the way from your room, so he grabbed some headphones from his bedside table, plugging in his earbuds into his ears as the sounds of the girls moaned and talked dirty to each other. 

“You taste so fuckin’ good,” the girl that was doing the eating out said before she crawled her way up to the other’s body. 

And the slightest moment as Harry was watching, the girl on her back had shifted down a bit as they kissed, and Harry’s eyes flew wide open once he glanced. He saw the face that he wouldn’t have expected he would see. 

His roommate. His best friend. It was you. 

You were being eaten out on his computer screen by Daniela, and he was in complete shock. He honestly hadn’t expected to find you because it was just a random scroll through the site, but holy fuck. 

You hadn’t had your account for very long—maybe about three months. But you thought it was a good way to make some extra money because the bills were stacking up and they had to be paid off somehow. And you loved the idea of getting off in front of a camera for random strangers who pay to see that shit. 

And of course, Harry didn’t know you were a cam girl at all. He hadn’t seen that coming when he was looking for something to get off to. But he wasn’t complaining. He just didn’t expect you to be the one on the other side of the screen. But there you were, showing your body and having sex with someone on camera for the (as shown) 27 people watching who are also horny as fuck. 

You as a person are already beautiful, he knew that, but your body was something else. The way your tits were shown so clearly on his screen with your tattoo that was inked right next to your left tit; as the purple light hit your skin. He wanted to take them in his mouth and devour them. 

You were sprawled out onto the bed, naked as Daniela was kissing you, and he couldn’t stop looking at you as your face looked while kissing someone. He was in complete shock that he stopped stroking himself, his dick in his hands as he watched you two make out. But once his cock twitched from the sight of your ass sticking up, getting a view of your glistening pussy and ass, he continued. 

You flipped Daniela onto her back, making her squeal in surprise before you started kissing down her body, leaving small and sweet kisses to her soft skin. You took her nipples into your mouth, sucking on it lightly as she moaned. Once you were lying on your stomach between her legs, you gave her inner thighs a kiss before licking one long strike up her pussy. You generally loved the way girls taste rather than guys, so your mouth salivates more when you’re with women, eating them out and tasting them, and pleasuring them to their orgasm.

You tongue focused on her clit, licking her sensitive bud relentlessly as your arms were looped under her thighs, and your hand reached up to grab one of her breasts, taking her nipple in between your finger and lightly pulling it. 

“Oh, fuck,” she moaned. Her voice was much more high pitched than normal, but you think it’s hot as fuck. “Like that.” 

That encouraged you to continue sucking on her clit, and you brought your free hand to plunge two fingers into her wet pussy, curling up to meet the soft spot inside of her. Daniela’s back arched off the bed as her hair was spread out onto the pillow as she grabbed a fistful of your sheets into her hands. You pulled your mouth away from her to place your hand on her clit, rubbing it fast as you continue to finger fuck her. Daniela was an absolute mess above you, chanting that she was going to come as a way to manifest her orgasm. 

“C’mon, beautiful. Cum for me,” you encouraged her, the sound of your voice had made Daniela and Harry moan out with how sultry and seductive you sounded. Daniela’s peak washed over her as her hips bucked up, but you placed your arm on top of her thigh to stop her from moving as you calmed her down from her high. You licked her up once more, collecting her juices on your tongue before climbing up her body to connect your lips with her. Daniela could taste herself on you, and it turned her on even more despite just having an orgasm. 

Harry watched as you two kissed for a while. She wrapped her arms around your back, pressing her body against yours as you two made out, swirling your tongues together. Harry fondled his balls, intensifying the feeling before going back to stroke his cock. He gripped on his long hair with his other hand, so it felt like someone was in the room pulling his hair for him, and he closed his eyes. With the feeling of his orgasm coming, he was about ready to pump faster so he could get to his peak, but he heard your voice again. 

“I’m not done with you yet. Wanna cum again?” You asked her, and she nodded eagerly. “Want you to cum when I say so,” you told Daniela, and she nodded. Harry slowed his movements down as if he felt like you were personally talking to him, even though a lot of people on her live stream felt the way he did once she said those words. 

You fixed the laptop, pushing it back a little but still pointing it down to your bodies rather than your face. Giving Daniela a kiss, you situate yourself, putting one leg over her and the other under. You reach between you two, inserting your finger in her wet hole and bringing that wetness to her clit, and she does the same to you. 

Slowly moving closer to one another, you touch clits, rubbing it against each other as you two moaned out. The sounds coming from both of your mouths were loud enough that Harry had heard them from his room, and it genuinely felt like he was in the same room as he was also watching it on his screen. 

“Fuck, I wanna cum,” he groaned to himself. 

“You wanna cum?” You said, rubbing yourself on her and she whimpered out a ‘mhm,’ and you proceeded to grind faster. 

“Yeah, please let me,” Harry moaned. 

The feeling of both your wetness rubbing together was sending you over the edge as you felt like you were going to explode. Your moans had gotten louder, and you really hoped Harry was wearing some sort of headphones with loud music because you felt bad that you were being this loud, but you couldn’t help it. 

But little did you know that Harry was listening to everything. 

You felt like Daniela had waited long enough to release, so you grabbed her face gently, giving her a kiss. “Go ahead. Cum for me,” you said breathlessly as you were going to let go after she was done. 

Once Harry heard those words, he sighed in relief, letting out a loud groan as his orgasm was released onto his stomach. His abs clenched and his hips bucked into his hand. He grabbed a pillow and bit on it, concealing his moans as he came down from his high. With his chest heaving up and down, he looked over at his laptop to see you breathing deeply and he knew that you had just orgasmed as well. 

Your orgasms had hit both of you hard as you were left sprawled out on the bed, laying on opposite sides as your legs were still entangled with one another. Daniela sat up, pulling your body towards her, and she kissed you deeply, still feeling entirely breathless. 

“God, you’re amazing,” she said against your lips, and you smiled into the kiss. The live stream was still going on, so Harry continued watching you two interact with one another post orgasm. “Kinda wanna use that dildo of yours on you,” she smirked, and you chuckled, nodding your head eagerly. 

“Like a threesome, but with a dildo,” you joked, and she laughed. 

“Maybe we should have one?” 

“What? A threesome?” You asked, pulling back, and she nodded her head and shrugged her shoulders. 

“Yeah, why not?” 

���With who?” 

Just on cue, a knock was heard on your door quite loud, making you and Daniela turn your heads towards the door. Before you even had the chance to even get up, the door opened, revealing Harry in just his boxers. You couldn’t help but look down at his crotch area and see his cock hard. 

“Done with the show ladies?” He asked, smirking. The two of you were still completely naked, but neither of you cared to make an effort to cover yourselves. 

“W-What?” You stuttered and looked at Daniela as she had no clue what was going on either. 

“Watched your live stream,” he finally said, and your eyes widened. 

“How did you find it?” You asked, moving towards the edge of the bed, and Daniela stayed behind near the headboard. 

“By coincidence, I swear,” he said, walking towards you. “Was just scrolling and I was horny as fuck, and I stumbled upon it.” 

“D-Did you like it?” A nervous tone came with your words, and it was strange because you’ve never been nervous with Harry, except the time you came out to him. A huge part of you wanted him to say he liked it and that he enjoyed the show, and you really hoped he did. 

He stood in between your legs and looked down at you as you looked up. The sight below him was just something that irked him; you looking up at him with wide eyes, acting innocent and him looking down at you with a raging hard on, begging to be touched by you and your mouth. He placed his hands on both sides of your face, caressing your warm cheek as he studied you for a moment. The smear of mascara that laid under your eyes and your flushed cheeks made his cock twitch. 

Just from watching your live stream, he noticed that you were quite dominant in bed with girls. But with how you’re looking at him, wanting validation and reassurance from him, you’re submissive with men (or just him in general).

His stare was intimidating, and the dark purple light illuminating your room didn’t help. He’s never seen you naked and bare, so that added to the stress of if he likes what he sees. But you were surprised that you didn’t want to cover up in front of him. Throughout the years of being best friends and roommates, you two have never fucked. Although you have kissed multiple times, it was purely platonic and sometimes you just needed a kiss every once in a while. And as your best friend, Harry was happy to help. 

“Of course I fucking loved it. Wanna know my favorite part?” You smiled softly, nodding slowly as you looked at him with big and innocent eyes. He bent down, matching your eye level before he whispered, “Well, first of all you, of course. Looked so damn beautiful, I swear.” You blushed, and he continued. “But the part when Daniela suggested a threesome just a minute ago. If you and her are up with me being a plus one, then I am. Your wish is my command,” he said softly, kissing your nose.

Daniela gasped behind you, a big smile on her face as she crawled to the edge of the bed, wrapping her arms around your waist and kissed your shoulder before she spoke. 

“Well, looks like we’re gonna have a lot of fucking fun.” 

#harry styles smut #bi!reader #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles dirty imagine #harry styles ff #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #roommate!harry #uni!harry #bestfriend!harry #harry styles au #gxg #harry styles writing #harry styles one shot #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles #harry #hs

[itsreigns]

Everywhere

Evan Buckley x Reader

His parents come to visit Evan and (Y/N) during the weekend. Evan wasn’t particularly excited about it, and then, (Y/N) finally understands why.

Warnings: Angst. Fluff.

Words: 1,572

TAG SQUAD:

@xfirespritex​​ | @hardcorewwetrash​​ | @shadow-of-wonder​​ | @wardl0w​ | @helluvawriter​ | @tryingtofindaplaceinthisworld​ | @heygargano​ | @moxleysbaby​​ | @lustyromantic​​ | @the-iridescent-phoenix​​ | @sassymox​ | @bull-moose-penguin​ | @finalgirl-x​ | @littlefreya​ | if you want to get (un)tagged let me know

___________________

Buck’s parents will come to visit us this weekend. I’ve met them many times before, not for a very long time though, but it’s the first time they’re visiting since me and Buck moved in together.  

I don’t know why, but he’s not particularly excited about it. I thought about calmly asking him about it, but I decided I’d wait for him to be ready to talk to me instead. And today, two days before their arrival, he reached out during breakfast. 

“I’m just anxious about it.” He states, avoiding my gaze, instead focusing his attention on the fork resting on the table as he messes with it. 

“But… why, babe? I thought you liked having your parents around. They’ve been here before.” I carefully try to reason him, trying to understand him at the same time. 

“I do… And sure, they’ve been here before, but not during a complete weekend.” He sighs heavily, clearly frustrated that he can’t find the right words to explain himself. “Nevermind.” 

So, his problem is that they’re going to be here for a long time? I don’t even think 48 hours is that much time, to be quite honest. I feel like there’s more to this, but I can’t quite put my finger on it yet. 

“Evan, you know you can talk to me about everything, don’t you?” I say softly, covering his hand gently and caressing it. He finally looks me in the eye and stops fumbling with the fork. 

“I know, baby. I know. I’m sorry… I just… Sometimes they’re… it’s not easy to deal with them.” He tries to explain himself, still struggling to find the right words. I tug on his hand for support. 

“Hey, whatever happens, we’re in this together, and I’ll be here for you, ok? No matter what.” I reassure him, leaning in and pressing a kiss to his lips. 

“Thank you. I love you, (Y/N).” He whispers against my lips.

“I love you, Evan.” 

*2 days later*

Saturday’s here. Two days passed by smoothly. Evan was a bit more at ease, but I could tell he was still anxious, there was still stuff floating on his mind. But I just gave him space. I know him, and he definitely doesn’t like being pressured. Sometimes I intervene, obviously. But right now, I don’t think it’s the right thing to do. 

I was busy getting our dining room ready for lunch as Ann and Connor would be arriving in no time, when I realized I haven’t seen Buck in a while. I found him quickly as he’s sitting on the couch, bouncing his leg anxiously, lost in thought. That seems to be a thing for him lately. 

Feeling the couch shift beside him, he jumps in his seat just as I’m reaching out to caress his thigh. “Jesus, (Y/N), you scared me.” 

“I’m sorry, Evan.” I apologize, biting my lip. I stare at him, caressing his cheek, as if doing so, would help me find some clue of what’s going on or, at least, something that helps me start this conversation. “What’s really going on, babe?” I ask softly, moving my hand to hold his tightly. 

“I…” He trails off, averting his gaze to his lap, consequently avoiding mine. “It’s nothing, (Y/N). Really.” 

“It’s not nothing, Evan. I know you.” I confront him, keeping my tone even and gentle. “Whatever’s bugging you, it’s not nothing. I can tell it’s serious.” 

Buck sighs heavily, burying his head in his hands. I get closer to him, putting my arms around him and caressing his back with my hand soothingly. The silence lings in the air for a couple of minutes. 

“It’s stupid.” He finally says, still in the same position, not wanting to face me. 

“If it’s upsetting you, it’s not stupid, Evan.” I whisper, tugging his left arm to me so he’d finally face me. He concedes, so I take his hand in mine as he still rests his chin under his other hand. “Whatever it is, I won’t judge you. I’m not here to judge you, I’m here for you. No matter what.”

“It’s just… My parents. I don’t think I’m mentally ready to have them here.” He finally admits. I can tell there’s much to the story, but for now, I’m just content with the fact that he’s opening up to me. “You just don’t know how they truly are. I mean, I love my parents, but they just... “ He trails off, not sure of how to end that sentence. 

“Evan, we’ll go through this together, ok?” I whisper, and he nods. “If you feel uncomfortable or something, we’ll just come up with some excuse and we’ll make them leave. It’ll be fine.” I assure him, leaning in and pressing a few kisses to his lips. 

*Sunday, 1:25pm - 24 hours into having Evan’s parents at home*

Now I know what Evan meant yesterday. Ann and Connor spent the whole day being passive aggressive towards him. About everything. About him as a person. About his job. Honestly, I don’t know how they can’t see that what they’re saying is hurting him. It was definitely pissing me off, so I’d just answer back assertively. 

So, last night, before we went to bed, Evan sat down with me and just asked me not to say anything, that he’d handle it. I’m trying to respect that, but I hate seeing him so down and sad. I think he should speak up and tell them how he feels, but I can see why he doesn’t. 

We’re hanging out in our living room after lunch when his mom speaks up, breaking silence.  

“How do you feel about my son’s job, (Y/N)?” She asks me, out of nowhere, completely catching me off guard. 

I lock my gaze with Evan’s and he shoots me an apologetic and ashamed look. God, he looks so sad, I hate seeing him like this. 

“I love that he’s a firefighter. He’s a hero to so many people. He’s my hero.” I say truthfully, shooting him an assuring smile, which he returns timidly. “I’m really proud of him.”

“Aren’t you scared that he’ll get killed trying to save somebody he doesn’t even know? I tell him that all the time, he’s risking his life for strangers.” She affirms calmly. Doesn’t she have a clue? What the fuck?

“If everybody thought like you, there would be no first responders, no firefighters in the world.” I reply, matching her calmness. “Of course I’m scared he might get hurt, but I trust him and I know he’s very good at his job, and so are his coworkers. They’re all super professional and qualified for their functions.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” That’s all she said. For a few seconds. Then she speaks up again. “But you know, he’s not as nice of a boy as he used to be. That job changed him. Connor thinks so too.”

“Well, then I can tell you that you’re right. He’s not a nice boy.” I say confidently, smiling sweetly at them, making the three of them move their attention fully to me. “He’s a great man. The best man I know, if I’m being honest. He’s grown into this amazing man, with this huge heart, a true fighter. He outdoes himself and surpasses any adversity or obstacle that comes in his path.”

I stop talking for a few seconds, turning to face Evan, and his beautiful blue eyes are shining with emotion, his mouth slightly open. His mother is staring at me, a blank expression on her face. And his dad seems to be lost in thought, as if he’s letting my words sink in. 

“And those are just a few of the million reasons why I love him.” I add, proudly, finally finishing up, feeling overwhelmed myself.

Thankfully that conversation subsided. A few minutes later, Evan motioned me to follow him, so we quietly excused ourselves to our bedroom. 

“Are you o-” I start once we get inside but he quickly cuts me off. He pulls me into a really tight hug, and hides his face in the crook of my neck. I could feel his hot, steady breath against my soft skin, and it feels so intimate, like home. 

“I love you so much, (Y/N). So fucking much.” He mumbles against my skin, his voice slightly wavering with emotion. “Thank you, babe.”

“For what?” I ask genuinely.

He pulls back slightly, but still keeps me in between his arms and close to him, and locks his gaze with mine. 

“For everything. For defending me, just now. For supporting me. For loving me.” He lists out, blushing a bit by the end. “No one ever did that for me.”

“I love you, baby. I always will be by your side, loving you and supporting you.” I reassure him, moving my hands to press my palms against his chest. “And also give your parents a reality check if needed.” We both chuckle lightly at my last sentence. “What would you do without me, Evan Buckley?” I laugh, playing with his shirt’s collar.

He pretends to be thinking really hard about what I just asked, so I playfully hit his shoulder. “Babe, stop.” I pout. 

He leans down and kisses me for a few seconds, before answering truthfully to my question.

“I’d look for you everywhere. I wouldn’t stop until I found you.”

Give me feedback???

#evan buckley imagine #evan buckley x reader #evan buckley fic #9-1-1 imagine #911 imagine #9-1-1 fic #911 fic #evan buckley oneshot #evan buckley one shot #evan buckley fanfic #evan buckley fanfiction #9-1-1 fanfic #911 fanfic #9-1-1 fanfiction #911 fanfiction #buck x reader #buck imagine

[lavender-scent]

BBRae Week Day Five - Sunny Days

AO3 - FF.net

I Know My Heart Can Be So Cold, But I'm Sweet For You.

It was a beautiful sunny day in Jump City. The Titans agreed to seize the opportunity and go out since the city’s villains seemed to want to enjoy a day off as well.

Except for one person.

“What do you mean you’re not going?”

“You heard me Beast Boy,” she sighed, “I’d like to spend the day at home. Why is that so hard to understand?”

“But everyone is going!”

“And I’m not.” Raven gave him her back declaring the end of their discussion.

He wanted to try to convince her more but he heard his communicator vibrating. “Beast Boy, are you coming?”

He brought it closer to his mouth to speak, “On my way, Cy.”

It had been going like this for a while now: Raven constantly refusing every invite from the team and spending more and more time alone. Beast Boy and the others had tried to convince her to go out with them multiple times only to be rejected at every turn.

The whole team gave up eventually except for Beast Boy. It had taken her long enough to open up to them all, especially him, the first time and he didn't mind getting her to do it again even if it took a while.

Their friends believed it was just a phase but he didn’t want to risk it. He was not letting her shut herself in and isolate herself that easily.

“I’m going now but if you change your mind give me a call, okay?”

“Okay,” she said, still giving him her back.

He sighed but transformed into a hawk and flew through her window down to where his friends were waiting.

“What did friend Raven say?” Starfire asked once he got into the car.

“The usual. I want some quiet time by myself, blah blah blah. You should try it, Beast Boy, blah blah blah.” He tried his best impression of her with a frown.

“We’ll give her space. Maybe she’ll come around.” That was Robin’s answer every time.

'Next time there won’t be any “space”', Beast Boy thought to himself. He would get her out of that room. Not today, though. Raven really hated the sun and it was an exceptionally bright day out.

As they got to the park and started unpacking their stuff, Beast Boy realized he forgot something. “My umbrella! I forgot it at home.”

“B, for the last time, it’s not going to rain.”

“But the weather lady said there’s a 60% chance it would.”

“But the sun is bright and shiny today,” Starfire pointed out, “it does not seem that it will be the raining today, friend Beast Boy.”

“You know I hate the rain! Better safe than sorry.”

“What’s wrong, is the little kitty afraid to get wet?” Cyborg teased.

Beast Boy ignored him and transformed into a hawk for the second time. It would only take him a few minutes to grab his umbrella from the tower and be back. Once he got back to the tower he transformed back into his human form.

The tower smelled different than when he left it, felt different. Was Raven performing some sort of a spell? No, he knew when she was practicing spells. The scent always included herbs and old books. This scent smelled… sweet?

“Stop!” he heard a familiar voice.

Raven.

He ran to the source of the sound only to realize there was more than just her pleading voice. It made him run faster.

“Don’t touch her!” Beast Boy yelled when he reached Cyborg’s lab.

What Beast Boy saw was the furthest thing from what he expected. He had had all the worst scenarios prepared in his head, only to find Raven holding what looked like a five year old boy in one arm and a girl that seemed just a little bit older on the other.

“What the-“ before he got to finish his sentence he was cut off with screams.

“BEAST BOY!” the boy and the girl both jumped from Raven’s arms into Beast Boy's.

Beast Boy looked down at the two kids hugging his legs and back to his teammate. She looked like she was barely breathing.

“Raven, you brought Beast Boy!” the girl spoke first.

“It seems like I did.” She said nervously. She walked to Beast Boy and held his wrist, “Can I have a word?”

“Of course.” He followed her to the hallway leaving the two kids alone in the lab.

“What are you doing here?”

“I forgot my umbrella.”

“You do know that it’s not going to rain.”

“But the weather lady said-“

“Enough with the weather lady!” she threw her hands in the air in frustration. “Take your umbrella and just leave.”

“Okay, fine!” After a second thought, he asked, “Wait, who are those kids?”

“They’re my… cousins.” Raven said after she realized there was no way she could hide it any more.

It was obvious she didn’t want him there but he was still confused. Why did she hide that from the team?

“I didn’t know you had cousins?”

“I’ve reconnected with my aunt on Earth a few weeks ago. She had some work here in the city and I offered to take the kids for the day.” Raven answered hoping the investigation would be over soon. “Any more questions?”

“You have an aunt and you didn’t tell us?” Beast Boy paused. “Is that why you haven’t been spending as much time with us lately?”

“I.. I wanted-“ Raven was cut off by a loud noise.

They went back to the lab to find the boy climbing Cyborg computer set.

“James, get down! Raven is going to be mad at us!” his sister – Beast Boy assumed – tried to reach him using a chair but he was far above her.

“James, get down!” Raven ordered.

“I can’t!” James cried. “I don’t know how!”

Beast Boy decided to step in transforming into a moose, holding the little boy with one antler and putting him back down.

“That was awesome!” the boy yelled once the changeling went back to his human body. “Do it again!”

“Yes, Beast Boy do it again!” the girl joined.

“Erica, I believe Beast Boy has somewhere to be.” Raven gave him a glare.

“Right!” Beast Boy found himself forgetting about the picnic. The truth was he wanted to stay with Raven. “Are you sure you don’t need my help?”

“Nope.”

Both Beast Boy and Raven tuned at the sound of something breaking.

“Sorry,” James said, putting back a remote that was now in half.

Raven sighed. “Why did I think bringing them here was a good idea.”

“We still haven’t seen the training room!” Erica reminded her.

“I…” Raven was trying to think of a way to get out of this seeing how James causing chaos in the lab just confirmed that he shouldn’t be anywhere near all those weapons. Before she got to say anything, Beast Boy spoke up. “Who wants to go to the fair?”

“Me! Me! Me!” Both kids held their hands up high.

Beast Boy turned to his teammate. “You think you can give us a ride?”

Raven was caught by surprise. “Uhm, yeah I think I can. But only once.”

She held the changeling's hand with one and Erica’s with the other asking her to hold her brother’s hand as well.

When they got to the fair the kids immediately let her hand go and ran to see all the games they could play.

“That was a close one,” Beast Boy chuckled.

Raven didn’t laugh. “What are you still doing here?”

“Helping you?”

“I didn’t ask for help. I have everything under control. You can leave.”

“Everything under control? Okay then, where are the kids right now?”

“They are right ther-“ Raven looked around to find neither of them within her sight.

“They’re by the big wheel. You’re welcome.”

“I knew that.”

“No you didn’t. Now can you let go of my hand so I can get them some tickets.”

Raven looked down to find that she was indeed still holding his hand. She removed her hand from his and hoped that the hood of her cloak was hiding her blush as he left to go get the tickets.

“Can we please get ice cream?” James asked, running to her.

“Sure.”

“And I want to get on the big wheel!”

“Whatever you want.”

“Is Beast Boy your boyfriend?”

“No,” she answered without thinking. “Wait, what?”

“I saw you guys holding hands,” explained the little boy.

“No, we’re just teammates.” Raven blushed. Why would the kids ask her such a question? Weren't they too young to know about this stuff?

“My friend Lily thinks you guys look great together,” Erica said after she joined them. “She has all these drawings of you.”

“Drawings? Of us?”

“Yeah, kissing.”

Raven tried to change the subject when she saw her teammate coming with the tickets. “Oh look! Beast Boy brought the tickets. Go stand in line for your turn.”

They ran to Beast Boy to get their tickets and went back waiting at the big wheel.

“At least now we don’t have to worry about them getting hurt or killed by Cy.” Beast Boy said cheerfully.

“Yeah, great," Raven replied harshly.

Beast Boy turned to look at her. “Are you mad at me?”

She ignored him.

Beast Boy knew she trying to push him away again. Too bad it wouldn’t work.

“Why didn’t you tell us about your aunt and cousins?”

“It’s stupid.”

“I like stupid.”

“You wouldn’t understand. None of you would.”

“Try me.”

Raven exhaled a long breath. She had a feeling Beast Boy wouldn't be giving up soon. He never knew when to stop.

“I didn’t tell you about my cousins because I didn’t want them to meet you.”

“Are you embarrassed by us??”

“No... the opposite.”

“You’re… proud of us?”

“No! That’s not what I meant. I mean I am proud of you. I just didn’t want them to meet you because I know they would love you more.”

Beast Boy had never been more confused in his life. “People are usually happy by that.”

“I want them to love you. I just don’t want them to love you more than…. More than me.” Her insecurity finally broke through and she looked almost ashamed despite her defiance.

“Rae, I’m sure the kids love you. You’re an amazing person.”

“Yeah That’s how it felt before you came.” Raven knew she was being immature about this but she couldn’t help it. “I know I say I don’t care about fans but it’s always the same. Kids usually like you, guys like Cyborg, girls like Robin and boys like Starfire. No one likes me.”

“That’s not true!”

“Yeah right. How could I forget? Only creeps like the creep.”

Beast Boy gave her a sad look. He hated when she thought of herself that way. That was not who she was.

“Anyway,” Raven continued, “it felt nice to find my cousins and for them to see me as their favorite hero.”

She waited for him to tell her how childish and petty that was, how selfish she was to be hiding her whole family for the sake of being a kid’s favorite. But she heard none of that.

“Then I have to tell them about all the times you saved our asses.”

“What?” Raven gave him a confused look.

“Come on.” He took her hand and went to the kids as they just left the big wheel a little dizzy. “Who wants ice cream?” he asked.

Once they got their ice cream –strawberry for Beast Boy and Erica, chocolate for James and blueberry for Raven – Beast Boy proceeded to tell the kids every time Raven saved the team. He started to sound like a bigger fan than the kids were.

Every time he finished one the kids would turned amazed at Raven and ask to confirm Beast Boy’s story.

They seemed to forget all about the games they were first excited about. Her aunt called to check on them and agreed to pick them up at the fair later on.

Erica noticed a costumes tent that offered face painting as well and asked if they could get one.

“What costume do you want?” Raven asked.

“Yours! ” cheered Erica.

“Me too!” followed James.

Raven was shocked. She thought at least James would want to dress as the changeling or maybe Robin.

Both of them ran to the tent to look for costumes their sizes.

“I’m gonna go pay for them,” said Beast Boy as he walked after them.

She waited for them until they came out wearing blue cloaks and running around her. “Look Raven, now I’m Raven!”

She smiled at them and then looked up to see Beast Boy grinning at her.

They met her aunt not so long after. “I left one Raven only to come back to find two more!”

The kids ran to hug their mother. “We’re helping Raven save the city!”

“Hey, I’m Beast Boy.” The changeling offered his hand.

“Hi, I’m Selena, Raven’s aunt, ” Her aunt replied as she shook his hand. “Raven talks a lot about you!”

“Really?” Beast Boy glanced at Raven to find her face flushed.

“Aunt Selena, aren’t you late for your subway?” Raven reminded her.

“Right, right, I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Thanks for watching the kids! And it nice to meet you, Beast Boy.”

“Likewise.”

Beast Boy couldn’t miss the opportunity to tease her once her aunt left. “You told your aunt about me?”

“You’re a superhero. She already knows about you.”

“Yeah but it’s not the same as from you.”

She tried to stop herself from hitting him because of the stupid grin he was giving her but he was making it very hard.

Suddenly, Raven felt something funny on her nose. She touched it to find her nose a little wet. Then again on her cheek. She looked up to realize it was raining.

She expected Beast Boy to complain, or say he was right. Instead he said, “Want to go on the big wheel? I saved us tickets.”

“You don’t want to go home? It’s raining.”

“No, I don’t mind.”

The ride was quiet at first but then Raven spoke. “Thank you, for today. I admit, I wouldn’t have made it without you. It was... Fun.”

Beast Boy only smiled.

On their wedding night, during one of the many danced they shared as husband and wife, Beast Boy reminded her of the day they spent with her cousins who were now older but still as excited to see their older cousin married. "When we went to get the costumes they asked me to marry you and I promised them, I would.” Beast Boy told her.

“I guess we make great part-rents together.” He moved his hand closer to hers, gently squeezing it, hoping she wouldn’t take it away. She didn’t.

“So you’re saying you’re with me only because you promised my cousins you would marry me?”

She laughed at his attempt at mashing partners and parents together. Then with a thought to his second statement she replied softly, “I guess we do.”

Beast Boy leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead as they swayed to the soft music. “I always knew I’d be with you. After that day I only wanted you more.”

nb: if you liked this check my poolside fic for day 2

also my friend's fic for into the woods for day 3

(@bbraeweek21 )

#somehow maneged to make raven jealous inthis fic too #bbrae with kids has become my favorite thing #bbraeweek21 #fic #day5 #bbrae #bbrae fanfiction

[buckyownsmylife]

You found me - Loki Laufeyson smut

The one where you’re on your period.

Warnings: period sex, oral sex (f), p in v, breeding kink, praise kink

Word count: 3.5K

A/N: Day 7 of kinktober and this one is coming out unrevised because I’m fucking tired and I don’t have a beta. The prompts were praise kink and period sex. Also, Loki is nasty and if you’re squirmy about the subject of blood in sex, you probably shouldn’t read this.

Loki’s P.O.V.

I’d watched the sweet human grow more agitated with each passing day. Upon my arrival at the tower, she immediately caught my eye, not only because of her indisputable beauty, but mostly due to how charming and approachable she was even to me, someone barely considered bearable by most of the other inhabitants of the building.

And still, she didn’t seem to care. Not that the others, her friends, didn’t like if she so much as stood closer to me, and not that I had once tried to destroy her entire planet. “You’re not your mistakes, Loki,” she’d answered when I inquired, at last beaten by my own curiosity. “To me, you have a clean slate. You’ve been nothing but polite and courteous to me since you arrived. I don’t have any reason to continuously mistreat you for crimes you’ve already been acquitted for or that you’ve already suffered for.”

She truly was a mystery to me, her kindness so unusual to my being that I couldn’t help but to drink it in as much as possible, looking for her whenever I didn’t have anything else to do, which was constantly. So when she started to change, despite the small nature of the differences, it all seemed that clearer to me.

It started with her bursting into tears in the middle of breakfast when my bull of a brother accidentally bumped into her, making her drop the cup of tea in her hands. Everyone was startled by the sight, much more than by the porcelain breaking, concerned that she had somehow managed to hurt herself, but after a while, she rubbed her eyes, clearing them of tears before dismissing our preoccupations with a wave of her hand.

“‘M sorry, I’m just sensitive today. I felt guilty over breaking something, God, I’m such a klutz.” No one even had the time to note that it hadn’t been her fault or that the tin man had more than enough money to buy thousands of cups just like the one now destroyed, because she was out of the kitchen in a hurry, taking the light of the morning with her.

Or at least, that’s what it seemed like to me.

Then, the next day, she didn’t appear for breakfast at all. I knocked on her bedroom’s door to find her still lying down, completely wrapped up in her covers, a look of pain in her face. “What’s wrong, my sweet?” I asked, immediately running towards her to check for any sort of bruises, but she simply waved me away.

“‘S just cramps, Loki. Don’t worry about it. I got a heating pad over my belly, I should be down in a minute.” I actually found myself pouting, unconvinced and still worried about who I considered to be my only friend, but when she smiled softly at me, nodding to assure me of her safety, I decided to grant her the space she apparently needed.

It did not mean I wasn’t still concerned.

Then the third day came and with it, an unexpected outburst that consisted of her screaming at that new Barnes guy for being so “awful” to me when he was the person who should understand what I’d been through the most.

Overall, I was definitely very confused about seeing her that angry. She wasn’t the kind of person to lose her head like that. But my confusion was easily surpassed by how touched I was by her demonstration of loyalty.

It had also left me incredibly aroused, and once again I had to resort to taking care of myself before going to sleep, but that is something I was trying very hard to ignore, in order not to scare her away.

But then, the fourth day came, and with it, the most puzzling display of foreign emotions I’d ever seen on her so far. It started with her avoiding me for the better part of the day, before jumping three feet in the air when I managed to find her in the kitchen after everyone had gone out for drinks.

“Y-your fingers are cold,” she explained, but I’d always been cold and she’d never once seemed to have any sort of particular reaction to the temperature of my skin before. “Everyone’s gone, I think I’m gonna call it an early night.” 

I wrapped my (cold) fingers around her wrist before she could run away from me. “I was hoping we could take advantage of their absence and watch that movie you’ve been talking about for a while.”

She seemed hesitant, and I tried to ignore how my heart hurt at seeing her avoid my eyes. “Please?” I asked, aware of how I couldn’t remember the last time I’d done so, much less for another person’s companion. “I miss you.”

That last confession came out unintentionally, and I could already see myself backtracking when she raised her beautiful bright eyes to meet mine, smiling softly up at me in a sweet, innocent look that shouldn’t have turned me on as much as it did.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

“Ok,” I agreed, biting my lip to stop a moan from surfacing at the simple sight of Loki smiling openly at me, because of me. “Let’s do it.” I pulled him to the living room, trying not to shiver from how his fingers felt interlaced with mine, knowing he’d think it was because the cold bothered me. I didn’t want him feeling worse than I’d already made him feel, I was already too guilty for my behavior these last few days.

I put on the movie we’d been commenting about before locating a nice blanket to cover us with, before hesitating at the realisation that I really shouldn’t sit as close to him as I usually did. 

Unfortunately for me, he noticed, raising one of his perfect eyebrows as I tried to play it off as nothing, laughing at myself before taking a seat next to him on the sofa. “Let’s watch it!” I tried to come off as excited - I’d been the one commenting on how much I wanted him to watch Hocus Pocus for days now, but the second the movie started, I knew I was a lost cause. 

Being so close to him, sharing a blanket, being engulfed by his natural perfume of spices and winter, I felt myself growing wet despite my best wishes. Fuck. He was right there. But I knew he’d never see me in any sort of flattering, attractive way, so I had to get a grip over myself, because I didn’t want him to notice that there was something wrong with me.

“Are you ok?” He asked, a few minutes into the movie, as I tried my best to remain absolutely immobile in order not to feel his skin against mine. It was only after he asked that I realized I wasn’t even breathing properly, and I must have looked pathetic, sitting there like a statue, pretending to watch the television.

“Yes, yes,” I breathed out, adjusting myself in hopes to get more comfortable and hopefully calm down his suspicions. “Don’t worry about me. Watch the movie!” The problem now was that the way I was sitting, sitting on both my legs that were now curled underneath me, the throbbing of my clit was just that much more obvious, and I was on the verge of moaning just from the little bit of friction the position offered me.

Fuck, I hate this. 

I tried my best to shift in my seat as inconspicuous as possible, but every movement I made now sent a direct jolt to my desperate pussy. I was on the verge of crying when his voice interrupted my own internal monologue again.

“Okay, enough of this, Y/N. You will tell me what’s going on. Speak. Now.” The authoritative tone of his voice didn’t help my little situation at all, and at last, I found myself whimpering under his penetrating gaze. Immediately, my hands came up to cover my mouth, ashamed beyond belief that I’d done something so mortifying, especially since Loki’s eyebrows were now close to his hairline as he stared back at me with his mouth hanging open.

“Are you… Are you aroused?” I couldn’t really admit it, far too embarrassed to speak, so I just hid my face in my hands as I rested my elbows on my thighs. “Did I… Did I do this to you?”

Loki’s P.O.V.

I watched as she started giggling at my question, uncertain as to where that response would lead me as far as the question I’d asked was concerned. When I didn’t offer any sort of accompanying commentary, opting to let the silence in the room rest, she at last sighed, revealing her gorgeous face to me again.

“Yes,” she admitted, and I felt like my heart had stopped beating for a second. She bit her lower lip again, avoiding my gaze as she stared at the tv I’d turned off minutes ago. “I’m sorry, Loki. I know we’re friends, it’s just… I’m on my period and I get really fucking horny and…”

“You’re on your what?” I interrupted, unfamiliar with the term she was utilizing. She blinked a few times, like she wasn’t expecting me to be concerned about that particular part of her speech.

“My period,” she repeated, scratching the back of her neck. “I’m taking by your question that Asgardian women don’t have it, but us Misgardians do. Well, some of us, and only after we reach a certain age. Basically, we start… bleeding… from our… lower parts. And it’s very messy and emotional because our hormones start acting up and that’s why I’ve been acting crazy these last few days.”

I didn’t know what to say, too concerned with trying to process her words. “You bleed… from your lower parts. Why?” Confusion was all I could understand in the moment, but thankfully, it seemed like she didn’t mind. In fact, by the way her adorable giggle echoed around the room, she seemed very amused by my reaction.

“It’s basically nature's way of punishing us for not getting pregnant.” Well, I wasn’t expecting that. Immediately, perking up, I licked my lips as I dragged my eyes over her body once more, admiring the way her breasts moved with each breath she took.

“And you want my help to deal with that,” I clarified, but when her eyebrows shot up on her forehead, I got confused once again.

“No! I mean… No, of course not. What do you think you could do to help me with this?” She asked, hugging herself, her eyes avoiding mine once more. I huffed, getting tired of this and her sheepishness.

“Well, I could put a baby in you, for one.” By the way her mouth fell open, I could see that the idea shocked her, and I wasn’t sure if it was in a good way. “At the very least, I could help you deal with your arousal levels. Don’t you think that would be a much nicer way to spend the evening, than stealing glances at me while clenching your beautiful thighs?”

She shut her mouth but looked to the other side of the room, pondering my words as I waited for any sign of agreement so I could pounce. I was already licking my lips in expectation when she turned back to me, a supplicant look on her face.

“I-I don’t… I mean, yes, sure, but… Loki, I’m all bloodied!” I chuckled as I pulled her to my lap, enjoying her warmth against me. Carefully pushing away the stray hairs across her face, I made sure she was looking deep in my eyes when I talked to her again.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

“Well, I’ve always enjoyed the taste of blood.” The shiver that ran through my spine at his words and the feeling of his cold breath over my mouth stopped me from realizing what was going on until he had me in his arms, half-way through our hallway already.

“Loki…” I tried to warn him once more, despite desperately desiring anything he wanted to be doing to me, but he stopped me with a hush, his beautiful green eyes sparkling as he looked down at me in his arms.

“No more thinking, my sweet. Just feeling.”

The first thing I felt was the softness of his covers as he laid me down on his bed with all the care in the world, like I was the most precious thing he had ever held between his arms. “I never thought I’d see you here, like this,” he whispered, his eyes drinking me in, making my breath hitch at the lust I saw there.

The second thing I felt was his heart beating against mine in a quick dance as he laid down over me, both of our shirts dismissed as he kissed me deeply and languidly. “You really want this,” I noticed, finally realizing that Loki had been wishing for the same thing as I had, probably for just as long.

The only answer I got was a bruise on my neck from his icy lips, before he continued to trace a path with his tongue that took him directly to my nipples. “These look so sensitive, my dove.” He wasn’t wrong. I was sensitive all over, especially after the new nickname he’d just assigned me. “Do not worry, I’ll take proper care of them.”

He drew the nipples with the edge of his tongue, his eyes connected with mine the entire time, and I struggled to keep in the gasps and moans that were begging to be released. Almost as if he was reading my mind, he ordered, “Let them out, my sweet. I want to hear all of the delicious sounds you make. I’ve been dreaming about them for too long.”

The symphony of my own sounds of pleasure then broke free, adding to the dizzy feeling in my head as Loki continued to nibble and suck on each inch of skin available to him. The curtain of raven hair temporarily blocked him from me as he moved lower and lower across my body in a snail’s pace, until his lips were dancing on the edge of my jeans. Only then did he raise his beautiful eyes to meet mine again. 

“May I take them off?” I could only nod, but it was enough for him to open that blinding smile of his, while his fingers made quick work of my pants and panties. The smell of blood then reached my nose, albeit timidly, and I groaned, suddenly snapped back to reality. “What’s this?” Loki asked, his fingers playing with the string of my tampon.

“It’s one of the tools women use to contain the blood inside our bodies. I have to change them from time to time, but at least I don’t get permanently dirty during my period.” He didn’t immediately say anything, too preoccupied with analyzing my pussy, while I trembled in expectation under his unwavering gaze.

“Can I pull it out?” Loki asked, his eyes shining with a distinctive sparkle I couldn’t really identify. 

“Why?” I hesitated, unsure if I wanted him to see the mess it’d certainly become, even if I desperately wanted to have him inside of me.

“Because I want to taste you, my dove.” He teased me with tiny little kisses over my navel, a mischievous smile on his lips. “And I desperately want to feel you from the inside.”

I didn’t have anything to say to that, but Loki simply took my silence as an agreement. Soon, his tongue was tracing circles around my clit, until it finally closed in on it, before he softly sucked it inside his mouth. And I was a goner.

Thinking was impossible, and he was right, all I could do was feel. I didn’t even notice he’d already taken off my tampon until I felt his tongue going lower and lower, finding my wet hole and plunging inside of it.

He moaned at the taste of the wetness he found there, and I could only tremble in his arms and move my hips to fuck myself on his tongue. “And you wanted to deprive me of this…” He actually looked disappointed in me as he looked down on my cunt perfectly on display for him. He held my lower lips open with both of his thumbs before diving in once more, slurping and groaning and I felt myself cumming just from the deprivation of it all.

At the new flow of wetness that hit his lips, Loki actually growled against my pussy, stretching his jaw to encompass my whole pussy with his mouth. “I could taste you forever, my sweet…” he whispered when he finally pulled away, pushing two long fingers inside of me and pumping a few times as I whined when he touched my sweet spot, pressing harshly against in before pulling back and admiring the mixture of blood and cum in his fingers. “But I really need to be inside of you now.”

After sucking on his own digits until they were clean, Loki stepped out of the bed to remove his pants, revealing a gorgeously long cock, the head red and weeping as he pumped it a few times while looking down at the mess I was, sprawled out over his cover for his viewing pleasure. 

“You’re so beautiful,” he commented, almost to himself, and I moaned at the simple comment, catching his attention as his eyes flew back to stare directly at me again. “You get aroused when I compliment you.” It wasn’t a question, and I wouldn’t know what to answer if it were. However, to both of our eyes, it was clear that it was nothing but a statement of the truth.

“Come here, my little dove. Let me ease my throbbing hardness in that perfect warm cunt of yours.” Having yanked me to the edge of the bed by one of my ankles, he pushed inside of me swiftly, cautiously watching my face for any signs of discomfort. “How does it feel, my sweet? To have me inside of your body? Because to me, it’s like reaching Valhalla while remaining on Midgard. You’re so perfect. The perfect flower for me. I think I made the right choice in deciding to deposit the future prince in you.”

He didn’t give me any time to process the information he so casually dropped on me, immediately starting to fuck me with long and deep thrusts that made me feel his cock deep inside my belly.

Loki’s P.O.V.

“Oh, look at you, my sweet… so perfect, accepting me deep inside of you. Can you see it? Look, how much of you is already mine, my love.” I carefully reached her nape to pull her so she could view the protuberance in her lower belly every time I pushed in. “This is where our child will grow. I can’t wait to see you round with my seed.”

Y/N started to sob as I quickened the pace with which I speared her, her nails carving its marks on my shoulders and back. “Lo-Loki, what are you talking about?” She screamed over the sounds of our passionate lovemaking, and I grinned, rubbing my nose on her neck.

“About me making sure you won’t have your period again, my love. Wasn’t this what we talked about just before?” Her eyes grew big at my words, but before she could say anything else, I hit her special spot repeatedly, making her head fall back against the pillow as she screamed her release. “There you go, my sweet… my perfect girl. You want my seed? Say you want to be mine, my dove, say you’ll be only mine until the end of time.” 

I closed my eyes as I felt my own high fast approaching, my breathing getting heavier as our movements became even harsher, almost animalistic. “I-I want it, Loki. Make me… Make me yours.”

The sound of her melodic voice asking for my release was what brought me over the edge, and I made sure to continue to pump it further inside of her until I could no longer move, finally allowing myself to drop on top of her warm body.

“Loki…” She called out to me after a few minutes, when I was almost embraced by the sweet hands of slumber.

“Call me my prince,” I immediately interrupted, making myself more comfortable while remaining inside of her.

“My prince…” She tried again, earning an affirmative hum this time. “You know my period only stops while I’m pregnant, right?”

I took some time to think her words through, while I exchanged our positions so she’d be leaning over my chest. “That only means I’ll have to keep you pregnant until eternity, my sweet.”

#loki laufeyson smut #loki smut #loki laufeyson #loki #smut #loki laufeyson fan fiction #loki laufeyson fanfiction #loki fan fiction #loki fanfiction #loki laufeyson reader #loki reader #loki reader fanfiction #loki reader smut

[adhd-adept]

I have self diagnosed adhd and i was wondering if you could provide some advice regarding reading. I used to be able to just pick up a book and read when i was younger, but now that I'm older it's a bit difficult to just pick up a book and read for the sake of reading. I love reading, but i just can't seem to motivate myself to.

Any advice? I'd really love to get back into reading, but I'm trying to find a way to do it easier

Hello! I’m sorry this took me so long to answer, I’ve been mostly off Tumblr for a little while. I saw this some time ago at 3AM and thought “this deserves a more coherent response than I can give right now” and then forgot that this blog existed for several days.

That said, I absolutely have some advice for reading! I was a big reader as a kid, too, and I’ve recently had to re-discover reading after a long gap in any time spent sitting down with an honest-to-goodness book. There are a number of things you might consider!

DISTRACTIONS

First and foremost, recognize the reason it is difficult to read! For me, it is because reading isn’t the most interesting thing available. That doesn’t mean I don’t love reading! If I can manage to sit down and read a book, it is immensely satisfying - but it’s the satisfaction of the effort you put into something paying off. My favorite hobbies - drawing, writing, reading - are my favorite because of that sense of accomplishment that they give me. 

I love the feeling of holding a book and watching my bookmark move through the pages each time I set it down. However, it doesn’t give me the same instant gratification of reading wikipedia, or tvtropes, or scrolling Tumblr, or checking notifications on social media; even when I am unsatisfied, or even frustrated, with the internet, it can be very hard to put down. I know that people will tell you all the time “You need to put your phone down more!!” It gets old. But they have a point. What people don’t tell you is how to do that. 

For me, that tends to be about making it inconvenient for myself to get online, or do whatever is distracting me. This doesn’t necessarily mean making it completely unavailable. The distraction just needs to be less available than the task I want to do. I am the kind of person who gets online out of muscle memory, and then gets stuck there. Thus, many of my tricks rely on disrupting the muscle memory that lets you pick up distractions. I will put my laptop charger in another room, so that my screen time is limited to its battery life. I might tie a string around my laptop, or tape it closed, so when I go to open it I will be reminded “Oh yeah, I don’t want to do this right now.” I will occasionally rearrange the apps on my phone, so when I try to open Instagram and end up with the weather app instead, the thought of “wait, how did i get here” will snap me out of the thoughtless habits that led me to pick up my phone in the first place. I’ve even gone so far as to tape my phone to the ceiling. Whatever works.

If the weather permits, I might also walk a little ways down the block and find somewhere to sit and read. This can come with its own distractions, but it gets me away from my laptop, and I get a tiny bit more exercise and sunshine than I would have otherwise! This depends, of course, on whether you have transportation and whether you feel safe. But getting yourself out of the house can be a great way to get away from the things that would otherwise draw you away from reading. If you have a local cafe or library that permits you to sit and stay, those are also great options! I will bring my phone when I leave the house, but I might put it at the bottom of my bag, or put a bit of scotch tape over the power button, so that I have my phone in case of emergency but it’s just slightly inconvenient to get to without thinking about it.

It may not be the internet distracting you. But whatever the distraction is, it doesn’t need to be less compelling than reading. It just needs to be less readily available than your book is!

ENTHUSIASM

Another thing that prevents me from reading is that it often doesn’t have the same sense of urgency that other tasks might, whether that urgency is real or not. Give yourself a time limit! I may own books I haven’t read yet, but I will get to a book sooner if I have borrowed it from the library, because I know there is a deadline to return it! 

You can also get other people involved. If you have a friend who wants to read the same book, commit to a chapter or two a week and then call to discuss it. 

Or, if you have a friend who would be interested, and you are comfortable with your reading voice, you could read to someone! It might feel weird to offer, but you’d be surprised how many people really do enjoy being read to. If you both have time in your schedules, you could try to set up a regular call to get through a few chapters at a time. 

Generally, having a friend who likes the book is great for maintaining enthusiasm, even if they’re not reading it with you - I get to books faster if someone with similar taste says “This is one of my favorites! You would love it!” If you have a friend who has read the book you plan on reading, announce to them that you intend on reading it. Their enthusiasm might help you feel more compelled to read it, and there’s a good chance that if you don’t sit down and read it, they will remind you by asking “Have you read it yet? What do you think?” the next time you talk to them.

PREPARATION

Another great way to make reading easier is to set up a reading space beforehand. It’s one thing to pick up a book and say “I’ve been meaning to read this.” It’s another thing to put on some pajama pants, make a cup of tea, and curl a soft blanket around your shoulders before you settle down to read. For one thing, it’s just nice. But more importantly, it can function as a signal that tells your brain “it is Reading Time now. We are in the Reading Zone.”

Do you ever watch a TV show or listen to a podcast, and you let the theme song play on the first episode, and then skip it for the rest? Even if I’ve watched a show before, I will play the theme song on the first episode I watch that day. It’s the same principle - it serves as a transition, an intro that says “this is where I am now, and this is what I’m doing.” Give yourself an intro for reading! Have a certain spot that you like to sit when you read. Have a certain snack you eat beforehand.

I have all kinds of tasks with little “rituals” before them that help me focus on that task, or certain items that I interact with which I associate with it. I call them “declarations of intent,” and once I’ve made a declaration it’s easier to commit to it. Sometimes that means simply saying out loud, “I am going to do the laundry now.” Sometimes it means I wear a certain shirt if I’m planning to go for a walk that day, or drink from a certain mug at breakfast if I want to get some homework done. I have a specific hat that I put on when I want to write a certain character. Try to find something you can do to act as a cue that says “When I do this, then I will read a book.” Because of this, it can help to really lean into whatever the “aesthetic” of reading is, in your mind. Embrace a reading atmosphere!

It may also help to recognize that reading is something you can work your way up to! There is no shame in being out of practice with a hobby. I took my reading proficiency for granted for a long time because it was just a part of my life. It may help to think of reading as a skill! Start with something smaller and work your way up. Pick up a book of short stories or folktales before you tackle that six-book series you’ve heard good things about! Set achievable goals for yourself when you’re setting out. An early success can make a huge difference to morale, and it’s much better to start “too easy” and accomplish something than to jump in at the deep end and be frustrated by an early setback.

FORGIVENESS

On the topic of working your way up to things, I would like to say a word about mindset. It is easy to feel self-critical about things. Things that you think should come more easily to you. Things that you feel like you have no reason not to be able to do. One of the biggest things I’ve done for my ADHD is recognizing that there is always a reason why I behave a certain way. Accepting that allows me to actually address my struggles, rather than just feeling ashamed of them. I’ve had to accept that I won’t always do things that I set out to do the way I set out to do them.

I bring this up because not all of my advice here may work for you. In fact, some of it doesn’t work for me every time - a technique may work once, but I might fail to make a regular habit of it. I may make a regular habit of something, only to have it become less effective as the novelty of it, or my enthusiasm for it, wears off. I may eventually talk myself out of implementing an effective strategy because there is some part of it that I find unpleasant; or an intentional unpleasantness I once found motivating may eventually become intolerable.

That’s okay. I’m telling you now, it’s okay if that happens. It’s okay if the first method you try doesn’t work. Don’t set yourself up to feel frustrated. If you become frustrated, take a step back. If you borrow a library book and you still haven’t read it by the due date, just give it back. If you don’t actually enjoy the first book you pick up, put it down and try a different one. If you feel badly about not reading something your friend wants you to read, be honest and tell them you have a hard time sitting down, and that you don’t want to disappoint them if they keep asking, but that you will let them know once you have started it!

It can be easy to convince myself that feeling badly about something means it’s important to me, and that maybe if I feel bad about not doing something, it  motivate me to do it. There is a balance between making commitments, and not committing to anything that is just going to distress me. Sometimes there is a benefit to a sense of pressure, but I have to recognize when the pressure I create turns into frustration. That’s a fine line to walk! For all I speak of inconveniencing yourself, or holding yourself accountable, your strategies should ultimately feel satisfying, and show results fairly quickly! You may not see immediate results, but if it has been several days and your strategy isn’t working out, change tactics! And the moment you feel apologetic or ashamed about the thing you are trying to do, drop that strategy. Again, this can be easier said than done, but it is so worthwhile to learn how to allow yourself to “give up” on things that aren’t actually helping you, without feeling like you’re giving up entirely.

You want to get back into reading again because you want to enjoy reading again. If you set it up to feel like homework, or a chore, or an obligation, you may make it more difficult for yourself! Getting back into reading is about focusing on what you love about reading.

And hey, I’m always happy to help! I do only check Tumblr every couple weeks right now, but I’ll do what I can to be supportive. If you’ve tried these suggestions and they don’t work out, no worries! Everyone is different, and it’s no insult to me if things that work for me don’t work for you. But feel free to reach out again, let me know anything you have learned about how you function best in the meantime, and we can reevaluate your strategies!

I hope that helps! Happy reading!

#thanks for asking!! #nezjazz #let me know how this works out #a lot of the advice i have for reading is advice i have for Doing Tasks With ADHD in general to be honest #i use the same tricks i use to get myself to read sometimes to get myself to do things like wash dishes #it's about making yourself more interested in what you want yourself to do #and making it easier to do the important things relative to the ease of doing the less important things #i will just straight up delete apps off my phone if i spend too much time on them #most of the time i dont miss them #and tumblr i can access from my laptop it's just slightly more steps to actually log in and type in my password #(i ONLY use tumblr on incognito mode so it doesnt save my login and i have to actually enter my password every time) #(that way i know that if i actually take the steps to log on it's because i WANT to) #(because something about doing that is worth it to me) #(i did that today to come and answer this question lol) #(but that's also why it's taken me so long.) #(do let me know if you have any other questions! i'll be back eventually to help as best i can!) #(and i love feedback) #(if you discover something that works better for yourself let me know that too so i can share with everyone!)

[honeyandbloodpoetry]

Gender Thoughts Pt 1 and 2

The first time I put a binder on, a little under a week ago, I felt euphoric. Ever since I hit puberty very early on, I felt uncomfortable with my breasts. They never felt right on me, and even though I’ve come to love them sometimes, they still don’t always feel like they match up. I hated how people always looked at them, pointed out how much they showed in low cut shirts when I never even noticed they were--or even wanted them to. They were just there. I liked the way low cut shirts feel and look on me, I just can’t help these giant sacks of flesh that sit on my chest. 

Except...now I can! I ran my hands over my smooth chest, feeling bright. I looked into the mirror, and felt something warm wash over me. I put on my new masculine clothes, letting my partner clip on my new suspenders. I realized that I was shaking as I looked at myself again… I looked like a boy. I felt like a boy. Like a man. And I liked it. I wanted it. Admitting that to myself was like coming home. 

I remember being in sixth grade, walking around the track for my civil air patrol class. I had been slotted in with the rest of the girls, the boys walking ahead of us. I remember feeling uncomfortable being shoved in with only girls, and looking at the gaggle of boys ahead. The exact thought that whispered in my brain was “I wish I was a boy. I want to be like them, with them.” I never forgot that moment, and how strange it made me feel. How it was easier to shake that thought away, and dismiss those feelings. Except they never really left, did they? 

I remember sitting on my bed, crying with my best friend kneeling in front of me. I remember telling her how I didn’t like feeling like a woman all the time. That I wished I could be a black shadow, monstrous, androdynous. Specifically like Venom. She took my hand, did my makeup all in black and helped me pick out the perfect black outfit to achieve that dark, gothic look. I was so incredibly happy and validated. But I still felt like something was missing. 

I remember going into an Adam and Eve for laugh, not expecting much since I am an asexual with a low libido. I remember seeing packers and feeling my chest tighten. I never liked my genitalia--I had wished for a cloaca or something akin to that, but since that was biologically impossible for a human… I sometimes wished I had the opposite of a vagina. I frequently imagined what it would be like to have a penis. I frequently lamented the fact that I didn’t have one. I took the box up to the counter to ask some questions, my dress swishing as I went. The cashier told me it was for trans people only, and a girl like me couldn’t have it. She didn’t know what asexuality was, and had tried polyamory once but decided it was bad when her girlfriend kissed her boyfriend. I was upset, disheartened, and left the store empty handed feeling frustrated and lost.

I remember finally cutting the long, curly locks that had frustrated and imprisoned me for so long. Seeing all of my hair fall to the floor, staring into the mirror as the barber buzzed the back of my head… It made me want to cry tears of joy. It was the first time in my entire life that I had looked at my hair and was happy. The first time I could look in the mirror and feel like myself. Then I remember wanting to go shorter, and my barber encouraging me to keep it a little longer so I didn’t look manly, so I could still be soft and feminine. The way my stomach dropped and the sick feeling in my chest only increased when he began to make fun of the gay men who came down the street near his favorite restaurant. I never saw that barber again. I instead found a nice local place down the road from my apartment, where the kind lady cut it all off without question, other than “Why?” and accepted my warm “It makes me happy. It makes me feel beautiful.” 

But wearing that binder for the first time? It was as if a beam of light had funneled its way directly into my heart. I felt like a handsome man, with just a little bit of striking man boob, and it felt so right. My partner called me a dashing boy and my heart began to race. I still feel his hand tracing my jawline as he called me handsome, and the butterflies it sent up through my belly, even after more than eleven years. 

I love my partner--he identifies as agender and primarily masculine, and has been on the lookout for a good pair of size thirteen shoes to wear with a dress. They also wear joggers and flip flops and graphic tees and can’t seem to stop talking about the ocean and outer space. They’re probably one of my biggest inspirations for finding myself, and being authentically me. 

I’m not super sure who or what I am right now. I’m still figuring that out, but I’m pretty sure I’m somewhere between agender and genderfluid. I feel like me more than anything else, but all pronouns make me feel good. I feel like all of them and none of them at once, but I swing between wanting to be feminine and masculine pretty strongly, though I enjoy being masculine most of all--even when I’m wearing dresses and pink. I feel like a beautiful person in a dress or a button down, no matter what gender I feel like today or tomorrow. 

I am me. And I am one dashing boy, and one beautiful girl. 

4 July 2021

XXX

Since first writing this little essay, I’ve been doing a lot more examination of my gender. I have come to the conclusion that I am transmasc and nonbinary, and am shaky on the title of genderfluid. I am feeling less and less like a woman--if anything, occasionally adjacent to a woman rather than actually being one. I love feeling like and presenting as a man. I have my first appointment with a gender services doctor at my local community clinic for consultation on starting hrt testosterone. I am planning to start with low dose first, and see how I feel. 

I am still unsure of my exact identity, but I have found great euphoria with being and presenting as a man. I love being a man and everything that entails. I have loved myself like never before. Being with my partner is amazing, and he has been endlessly supportive--even recounting little things they had noticed throughout the years. One of the funniest being that I only ever referred to my body parts--my belly, hands, hair, genitalia--with masculine pronouns. I always seemed to see my body as male even if I had a certain sort of dissonance from it. 

Coming out has been difficult. I have had both positive and negative experiences from it. I have been told going on testosterone would be self harm, and that I can’t be something I’m not. I’ve had coworkers I trusted out me without my permission. But I have also had positive affirmation, polite questions, and discussions. I am terrified to tell my mother and her boyfriend--I have no idea how they will react and am terrified that I will be disrespected and disowned. 

But I am prepared to do whatever it takes to be my happiest and most authentic self. 

I have been binding a lot more often, wearing sports bras for long shifts at work, and occasionally going without either when I feel like letting my man boobs hang free. I’ve had the delightful experience of going to a men’s big and tall store and finally wearing pants. I grew up as a fat girl and felt as if I had to perform high femininity to be taken seriously and be treated well--and had been told by someone I trusted that I was too fat to wear pants, which I heavily internalized. So I had completely cast them away in favor of dresses and skirts, bows and gaudy jewelry. Realizing that I could wear pants was...totally wild. That I could be comfortable and look good in pants and shorts, and that it didn’t matter what people did or thought of me was life changing. Maybe I’ll feel like being feminine again someday, but right now this masculinity and masculine clothing, with perhaps the added spice of funky earrings, feels like home. 

I also grew up autistic and with PCOS, both which I think have affected my gender identity. Being autistic, I truly struggled to connect to others socially, and especially to understand societal norms. Being a proper woman felt like I was making up for everything else I was lacking--I may have been awkward, semi-verbal and weird with no friends, but at least I was cute and girlish. I never connected to womanhood though, and always felt out of place no matter how hard I tried. With PCOS, I had heightened testosterone, which meant wider breasts and shoulders, a lack of periods, and excessive body hair. I recall the endocrinologist asking high school age me if I had excessive body hair around my stomach, breasts, etc. and my mother jumping to say no I didn’t...even though I did. I remember suddenly feeling very self aware and ashamed of something completely natural, and even something I started to enjoy. I started shaving my entire body then. 

I even remember being in middle school, and thinking nothing of my hairy legs. In fact, I loved my body hair and how it felt. A rude girl began making fun of me though, tutting her tongue as she cooed, “Aw, does your mommy not let you shave?” Among other things, all throughout many years of severe bullying and abuse. I remember feeling ashamed, but not knowing why, and immediately shaving my legs, covering them in nicks from my shaky and unsteady hands, that same night. 

So many things set me back in my gender expression. So many things contributed to me willful ignorance and denial. I remember wanting to be butch, and everyone in my life laughing at me and saying I was too soft for that. That sweet, sharp ache in my chest. I remember going to a salad bar with my mother, wearing a button up and telling her I wanted to wear some more boyish clothes around that same time--I had already told her that I was bi sometime earlier. I remember her lip curling, looking uncomfortable, and telling me that I better not become one of those boy girls. My late father was very vocal in denouncing homosexuality and specifically men loving men--something which always sat horribly wrong with me on a deeper level. 

I think I might ending up being a trans man. I am still unsure and figuring myself out, but I struggle greatly with the autistic need for sameness vs. the trans need for change. My sapphic love of women has always been very important to me, and fully becoming a man rather than genderfluid is scary for that very reason. I am still navigating my identity and what it means to me and my reality--but no matter what, being a man, being masculine is integral to who I am. 

I was called a “sir” at a job interview for the first time the other day, and nearly began to bawl from sheer joy. The gender euphoria from that and so many moments is worth so much more to me than the years of suffering and ignorance and my ongoing struggles with dysphoria. I finally got a packer and have had help from my partner in learning to position it properly--I am thinking of cutting my hair even shorter. I have almost perfected a pretty basic tie tying skill. Okay, not really, but I’m getting there. I feel deep inside that even though my father loved me, he would not like who and what I am. Still, I wear the last watch he ever wore, and hope to be a good man like him--and to learn from the toxic parts of him to be an even better man. 

I am very excited to start hrt. I am terrified of hair loss and vaginal atrophy, but I look forward to so much more. I cannot wait for bottom growth and body hair, for the voice drop that will hopefully get me misgendered less. I have always felt disconnected from my voice and look forward to getting to know it better as it changes with me. I look forward to meeting with new facial hair. Working out and growing muscle. I just look forward to my second puberty and becoming more like myself. I look forward to navigating and exploring my gender even further, both with loved ones, support groups, and myself. 

More than anything, I am just happy to be me. 

25 August 2021

#transmasc #ftm #ftx #gender #genderqueer #transgender #trans #lgbt #lgbtq #trans man #nonbinary #genderfluid #poets of tumblr #spilled thoughts #gender expression #low dose t #hrt

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

Okokokok hear me out. You wrote watcher Grian and his boys before. How about dad Grian and his two (robot) sons? (That he certainly didn't just leave in closet)

Oh you asked for two robot sons? How about FOUR? :D

…

NPC Grian is tired of his closet. All he wants is a big open space to build rustic houses in peace, but Grian won’t let him. He has to stay here, away from everyone else, as if Grian is ashamed of him. Not that he thinks about that too much. It starts to hurt if he does.

Sometimes, he thinks just some company would be nice. Someone to talk to, to make his life in this tiny room less lonely. He used to put on a different voice and pretend he had a friend with him, but he doesn’t do that anymore. It just hurts too much when he stops talking and realises he’s still on his own.

How much time has gone by while he’s been in here? Days? Months? Years? He can hardly remember the last time Grian visited him. But his orders were very strict, and NPG cannot disobey his programming. He cannot leave the closet.

Do not leave the closet.

He can feel his energy depleting as his battery runs out. It lasts for years at a time so it must be at least that long since Grian visited him last. At least his lonely existence is coming to an end.

Do not leave the closet.

Do not leave the closet.

…

NPG opens his eyes and realises immediately that he is no longer in his closet. Instead, he can see trees. Grass. A blue sky. The sun.

He’s outside.

He sits bolt upright, his programming protesting violently.

“Hey, easy now,” comes a metallic voice. “You’re still recharging.”

NPG glances to his right and finds, to his shock, a robotic-looking version of Grian gazing back at him. “Who are you? How did I get out here?”

“My name is Robot Grian,” he responds. “And I brought you out here. You’d passed out in your closet; I guessed you’d run out of battery. I helped you recharge.”

“Robot Grian?” repeats NPG slowly. “I’ve never heard of you.”

“That’s because I am the second of Grian’s creations, created to fill the void after Grian decided you were of no use to him anymore. And there are others out there who need our help.”

NPG blinks at him. “Really? Grian has more creations?”

“Yes. Two more who need saving before they end up like you and me.”

After a moment, NPG glances away. “I can’t. I have to go back to the closet. I was ordered never to leave.”

“NPG, Grian doesn’t care about you,” insists Robot Grian. “Did you know you recharge using solar energy?”

NPG hesitates. “No, I didn’t know that.”

“And Grian still kept you locked away in a place where you’d never see the sun. That’s what he does, you know. He tosses us aside as soon as we’ve served our purpose and makes sure nobody ever finds out we ever existed. He may have created you but you don’t owe him anything. You don’t have to follow his orders anymore.”

NPG thinks about this for a while. Robot Grian’s words ring true; NPG is tired of living in a closet but if Grian had his way, he would never see the light of day again. If NPG ever wants to be happy, he knows he has to be free.

“Okay, so what is our plan?” he asks.

Robot Grian appears pleased at his decision. “As I said, there are two others who have been abandoned by Grian. We go free them then we go to Grian and force him to accept us for who we are.”

“And if he doesn’t?”

“Then we leave. He can’t overpower all four of us if we catch him on his own.”

“I see…” NPG pauses again. “If we are truly committed to moving on from just being Grian’s creations, then I would like to change my name.”

“Good idea,” says Robot Grian approvingly. “To what?”

“Rustic House,” NPG replies immediately. “My one true love.”

Robot Grian looks taken aback by his instant and rather bizarre answer. “Okay… What about Rusty?”

“Hmm… A nickname for Rustic House. I like it!” Rusty beams. This is the happiest he has been in years. “What will you be called?”

After a moment, Robot Grian shrugs. “You make up a name for me.”

“Me? Okay. Roby.”

“Whoa, okay, that was quick. Why that?”

“It’s short for Robot,” Rusty explains. “I think it’s cute.”

“Huh.” His new companion considers this. “I kinda like it, actually. And really, anything’s better than having someone else’s name with “Robot” tacked onto the front to differentiate myself from the original.”

“Yay! Are you my friend, Roby?”

Roby thinks. “I guess we’re more like brothers, aren’t we? We were both created by the same person, so-.”

Rusty’s smile widens and he grabs Roby in a hug. “This is amazing! I’ve never even had a friend before, let alone a brother.”

Roby chuckles, before carefully removing Rusty’s arms from around him. “Okay, sure. Remember, we’ve got two more brothers out there who need our help, so we’d better get going quickly, before Grian realises we’re missing.”

…

Roby leads Rusty to a giant box out in the ocean. He digs a hole into it and drops down, landing as lightly as a cat.

Next to him, Rusty falls on his face.

Rolling his eyes amusedly, Roby moves further into the room, which is decorated like the outside world, with a painted blue sky and grass as the floor.

“Who are we here to rescue?” asks Rusty, jumping to his feet.

“Him.”

Roby gestures upwards. Rusty follows his gaze and finds a large robotic shell sitting against the back wall, its face and outstretched arms frozen in perpetual satisfaction.

“Meet Grumbot,” Roby says. “He was created by Grian and his friend Mumbo Jumbo to be a mayoral campaign robot. They eventually blamed him for Mumbo’s loss in the election and abandoned him here, claiming he’s “happy” in this fake reality.”

“We’re gonna save him, right?” asks Rusty eagerly.

Roby nods, encouraged by Rusty’s enthusiasm. “Yes, indeed. I’m not entirely sure if Grian knows this, but the Grumbot you see before you is actually just a gigantic shell. The real Grumbot is inside what you might call its “brain”, supplying the larger body with its energy and knowledge.”

“Whoa…!”

“Yup. Wait there.”

Roby climbs up Grumbot’s outer shell and slips through a crack in its head.

Inside the nerve centre, he finds a smaller version of Grumbot, complete with moustache and Grian-style hair. He is slumped against the wall of his prison, unresponsive, just as Rusty had been when Roby found him.

Roby may be a robot but even he can feel sadness welling up in him at the sight of the little robot, a little over half his size, all alone in this place. He gathers Grumbot into his arms and slips back out through the crack.

Rusty helps him get down, his eyes fixed on the little robot in Roby’s arms. “Is this Grumbot?”

Roby nods. “This is him. I don’t know how he recharges but we’d better get him away from here. It can’t be doing him any good.”

The two leave the giant box and hop back into the boat they rowed here in. As they get further away from the prison, Grumbot starts to stir, as if waking up from a deep sleep. His eyes open just as the boat is pulling up to the dock.

“Hey,” Roby says gently, carrying him onto the shore. “Can you hear me?”

Grumbot blinks at him a few times. “Yes. Who are you?”

“My name is Robot Gr-.” Roby almost forgets his new name. “I’m Roby. This is Rusty.”

Rusty beams as he drags the boat from the water. “Hi!”

Grumbot tips his head on one side. “Who am I?”

“Your name is Grum,” Rusty tells him, before Roby can speak. “You’re a robot made by Grian and now we’re forming a gang so we can go beat him up for abandoning us.”

“That last bit isn’t true,” Roby says quickly. “We’re not going to beat him up. We just want him to accept us for who we are. All four of us.”

Grum glances from Rusty to Roby. “Where are my dads?”

Roby winces. He knows he has to break some bad news to the equivalent of a child. “They… um… they left. But that’s why we’re gathering our group together: so we can find our… our dad and make him accept us.”

Grum pauses, digesting this information. “Rusty. And Roby. And Grum?”

Roby nods encouragingly. “Yeah. You’re one of us, Grum. We’re gonna look after you, okay?”

To Roby’s relief, Grum smiles and nods. “Okay. Thank you.”

“You’re… welcome.”

…

Roby leads the other two to the place where they will find the final creation: Grian’s hobbit hole starter base. “I did some recon here a few days ago,” he says as the group make their way inside. “Grian keeps him in a closet, just like you, Rusty.”

“Closets are lonely and devoid of hope,” says Rusty.

Roby nods, unsure of how else to react to that. “Indeed. He was Grian’s original cam account but Grian dumped him in favour of the new one he uses now. That only happened a few months ago though, so he shouldn’t be as low on charge as you two are.”

The closet is located in Grian’s bedroom upstairs. Roby gestures for the others to stand back, before he opens the door.

Immediately, a figure shoves past him and zooms for the door. Thankfully, Rusty is standing in the way and he stops the person from escaping.

“It’s okay, it’s okay!” Roby scrambles up from the floor and gets in front of the figure, holding out his hands reassuringly. “It’s okay, we’re not gonna hurt you. We’re here to help, okay?”

Now that the person has stopped moving, the others can see that he too looks exactly like Grian, except with bigger, more expressive eyes, which are filled with pain and fear.

“It’s Grifter, right?” asks Roby softly. “Your name is Grifter?”

After a moment, the frightened cam account nods.

“Can you talk to me? Are you alright?”

Another pause. Finally, Grifter opens his mouth and croaks, “Where’s Grian? Wh-Who are you?”

“I’m Roby. That’s Rusty and Grum.” Roby indicates his brothers in turn. “Grian is… probably at his mansion at the moment.”

“Grian abandoned me.” Grifter’s face screws up as if he is about to cry. “I tried so hard to be a good cam account but he replaced me. What did I do wrong?”

“I’m positive you didn’t do anything,” Roby assures him. “Grian has an issue with creating things and then abandoning them when he doesn’t know what to do with them anymore. But now that we're all together, we can go find Grian and make him accept us.”

Grifter slowly looks around at the other three. “You guys were abandoned too?”

Rusty and Grum nod at the same time. “He locked me in a closet,” says Rusty helpfully.

“I was imprisoned in the brain of a larger version of myself that I was forced to feed with my infinite knowledge and energy until I had nothing left inside me except crippling loneliness and a rapidly depleting battery,” Grum says.

The other three stare at him.

“Okay, that’s the most depressing thing I’ve ever heard,” Grifter says, before turning back to Roby. “And you think we can just get him to accept us?”

Roby nods. “I do. Grian isn’t a bad person; he just doesn’t know what to do with us anymore. If we show him that we have purpose and our sentience has grown, maybe he’ll see us as actual living beings instead of unfeeling robots.”

“You are a robot, though,” Rusty points out.

“That’s beside the point.”

…

Rusty, Roby, Grum, and Grifter make their way into Grian’s mansion. They immediately find him working on something on the foyer, head buried in one of the many chests lining the walls.

For a moment, the group dithers a safe distance away, unsure how to start.

“Dad!” Grum calls unexpectedly.

Grian nearly jumps out of his skin. He sharply turns and his eyes widen as he registers his four creations standing together a little way off.

“O-Oh my god… What are you all doing here…?”

“We wanted to talk to you,” says Roby, taking the lead when it’s clear nobody else will. “You’re technically our father so we want to talk to you about… events that happened.”

Grian hesitates. “You mean… me locking you four away from the rest of the world?”

All four of them nod at the same time, causing Grian to sigh quietly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt any of you, I just… You all grew far beyond what I expected and I didn’t know how to handle that.”

“You abandoned us!” Grum cries. “You and other dad left me all on my own in a box in the middle of the ocean! How could you think I would be happy there?!”

Grian winces. “I’m sorry, Grumbot…”

“My name is Grum now.”

“We changed our names,” explains Roby. “I’m Roby. NPG is now Rusty. And Grifter is… just the same, really.”

“You changed your names? Why?”

“Because we’re trying to show you we don’t want to be your forgotten clones anymore,” says Roby. “We’re more like your sons. All we want is for you to accept us and love us the way we are. There’s no need to be ashamed or scared of us. We just want to live.”

“We can be a family,” says Rusty out of nowhere. “Right…?”

Grian stares at them for a moment, before giving a small smile. “We can absolutely be a family.”

Beaming, Rusty rushes over to Grian and hugs him. Grum joins soon after, and so do Grifter and then Roby.

“We’ve still got a lot to talk about,” says Grifter pointedly. “About how you made us feel with your abandonment of us.”

“Of course.” Grian nods. “I know I hurt you and I’ll make up for that. Things aren’t going to be perfect straight away.”

Rusty nods. He knows this. It’s obvious that they still have issues to work out but that hardly matters at the moment. What matters is he’s finally out of that closet AND he has a brand new family.

Finally, Grian is accepting him.

#hermitcraft #grian #npc grian #robot grian #the grifter #grumbot #Vaunna writes

[jaefluenza]

In Case You Don’t Love Yourself | J.jh

word count: 2,4k words

pairing: Jaehyun x prostitute!reader

warning: suicide attempt, suggestive content, mention of sex, arm-cutting, drugs, self loathing etc

a/n : i didn’t write this to mock or use the idea of not loving and appreciating ourselves, but through this little package of scenario i would like to pass on a message that; you cannot truly love another until you know how to love yourself. be proud of who you are, and not ashamed of how someone else sees you. forgive yourself and seek help from professionals or loved ones if needed. remind yourself every day that you’re not alone :) i’m here with all of u <3

I am very much aware that I am in a place where everyone thought is wrong and sinful. Everyone has to hide whenever they'd want to taste and jump into this particular world where they call it the devil's lair, but I get to taste and feel it almost every day.

Everyone eyes me with lust and greed, but no one ever looks at me with even one hint of respect. I know that I don't deserve any of it, but what about love, appreciation, and self-worth? I keep looking for them, oh, I swear I'd chase them to the end of the world. But my dirty body and this filthy mind of mine are banning me to look for who I really am. And I eventually came to the conclusion that I, a nobody in this big hellish world, do not deserve a single fucking love.

Sometimes, I thank God for allowing me to see the rays of sunshine through the small window in my miserable apartment, even though I'm not sure if He was listening. No one ever wants to listen to any of my prayers. I too, sometimes, are listening to people begging the Almighty, to forgive their sins almost every weekend. But that makes me do a lot more thinking, will He ever forgive me? I don't know, who would I ask?

That was until I met Jung Jaehyun.

Working in a place where I met a lot of dirty old men, some young perverts, and curious male students, I didn't expect myself to find a soulmate in any place in the world. For fuck’s sake, I couldn't even find myself. A soulmate? Sounds needy. But that one night, I didn't even know it changed me for the better.

He came with his two friends. One with long beautiful blonde mullet, and one with astonishing pink hair. Him? Not really that special, just a dazzling golden brown hair. I was so awe-struck by the three of them, and I knew that they couldn't just land in this kind of place without actually getting lost. There's no way that they instinctively came here to seek touch from a woman, I thought. But I was wrong.

"The name's Jung Jaehyun. And I would like to order three champagnes for the night. We're celebrating," He ordered with a gorgeous wink. I took his order, and as usual, I offer the services of the ladies we have here. Surprisingly, they didn't ask for any list just like any other guys did. He chose me. By the means of him, yes, only him chose me. The other guys bluntly said that they weren't coming for the sex, but he was. I immediately said yes and two hours with hell-like sexual tension later, I found myself having fun with the devil with him in the VVIP bedroom.

The only thing good from having this job was you got your sexual needs fulfilled, as any other human beings would say. And the only thing bad from having to be this kind of woman was you never got to find love. Moaning each other's names even though you only heard it like fifteen minutes ago never gives you the kind of love that everyone kept talking about. The lust-filled kisses you'd get every night will never compare to the ones they said will sweep you off your feet. They feel either as rough as if an abuser would grab a fist of your hair.

But that one particular night felt faithfully different. Jung Jaehyun kissed me like it was the last night he would ever see me. Jung Jaehyun stripped my upper top as if he would open a whole new fragile world. He sucked on my body like I am the most precious thing in the world. He made me feel like, maybe, I deserve some love in a tiny space called moment. Hang on, was that even love?

I had no idea, but some ideas did come to me at the moment. Something like adoration? Appreciation? Everything that sounds like love and affection.

And when I thought he kissed me so passionately like it was the last time he was gonna see me, we never ended there. He got my number, and I thought I was just gonna be a call girl.

He did call me two days after that hook-up, and I expected him to request me already naked in a sexy nightgown somewhere in a fancy motel, but no. You wouldn't believe me, but he requested my presence in a small cozy cafe for a lunch date. I remember blinking at the sound of his delicate question, before actually saying yes to him. He replied with a simple, "nice" before telling me when we should meet. And for the first time, my heart beats quickly in excitement.

Do I want to end my life? Yes, sometimes. When I feel like my lungs are filled with guilts and regrets, I'd want to just disappear out of this uncaring world. No one would know, anyway. But life does not work that easy, right? When life would suffocate my little existence, I know I can not just end it. Instead, I have to keep on fighting. As much as how dirty and useless I am as a person, I still have these little rays of pride and hope.

Back to Jung Jaehyun. He took me on a real date, something that I couldn't believe truly happened that day. He paid for the lunch after we ordered some fish-and-chips and two glasses of peach ice tea which felt like a fancy dinner compared to the countless ramen cups I had almost every day.

And, though it may seem strange, we talked. Like, having a good conversation as actual human beings who love to chat with someone under good weather. He asked about how I've been living, and I lied about how I live just fine, even though I wasn't sure if he had noticed the glint of my shaky eyes. He casually informed me about his life, how he lives with other four boys in the apartment, before telling me that he is, as a matter of fact, a celebrity in a strained manner.

I didn't dare to judge him. I mean, who even am I to judge? Everyone would know that I am nothing but a piece of trash compared to what he is. He is far beyond me. And I plucked up the courage to ask him the question that had just popped in my mind with a bitter laugh, "If you're a singer, then why would you be sitting with me here in daylight, and not spending some time singing or slaying the stage like you usually do?"

And he unworldly answered, "Well, because I'm interested in you?"

I know it was wrong to lash out on him like that. I was confused, I was pissed that he said he was interested in me. It's like he was saying that I got to feel this whole new experience, just because he was interested in me. I could never understand why he would be fucking interested in me, while there are millions of women he could just pick out to be his, but me? Hell no.

Though there was a little bit of regret when I unpleasantly ended the date, I couldn't do anything besides shoving him off when he offered to send me home.

Jung Jaehyun was indeed a whole new experience to me. He didn't give up just like that. He might know that it would be uncomfortable for me to receive his text at the moment, so he came again to the pub. I bit my lips nervously when I offered him a drink which felt like deja vu, and he only smiled. "I would like you for the night."

I wasn't ready for the sex, though I secretly crave a second time with him, and he seemed to know that. We ended up at the same VVIP room just like we first met, but he didn't touch me.

I sat down as he told me so, and when I thought that it could be a hint of dominance in bed, he also sat next to me on the edge of the bed. "You're not going to touch me?" I asked. He shook his head, "As much as I want to, no. We're just going to talk." I knew that I couldn't lose to his pair of sharp eyes, so I sighed and listened to him.

"That lunch, I apologize if what I said to you was offending." He paused before looking straight into my eyes. His deep brown orbs dig through my own pair as if he was looking for something hidden in them. "You did not actually offend me, but I was just overreacting."

"May I perhaps... know your concerns?" Oh, how much I love that gentle voice. It gives me reassurance and calmness.

"I was just confused. Like, how come a snazzy person like you, be interested in me who is a literal nobody? I was just feeling like you make a joke out of me. I'm sorry I made you apologize," I explained.

He chuckled beautifully. "You don't have to be sorry. It is not wrong for you to think like that, I wouldn't judge you. But after almost a week of knowing you, you are not that worthless like what you have just said." And for once, I believed in someone.

We continue to seek each other, him occasionally trying to tell me to quit the dark nightlife, and me trying to adjust to his busy schedules. We called each other as lovers, and I could finally say that I found the love I never thought I could find. I ended up quitting my job sooner than I expected, and move into his newly bought apartment one month after we started dating.

But, does life finally give up on hammering me down?

To be in love with Jung Jaehyun would be an understatement. We love each other so much to the point that I started to forget my anxiety and insecurities in awhile. He made it clear to me every day that I am worthy of being myself, being loved, and being cared for. Every time I would look at the mirror, he would get there as quickly as he can, to reassure me that he loves me, for everything I am, and I believe in him.

But is that enough? I don't know. As much as he showers me with love and fondness, he's not home 24/7. He works for our future, as he promised. And those alone times would have me overthinking on the big lavish sofa, am I really worthy of his time? Why would he stay with me, a literal nobody who still needs her pills every night before she falls asleep to keep her calm?

Yes, I never told Jaehyun that I have meds to keep my sanity steady. I never told him that sometimes I ordered some syringes of sedatives to keep my cries away. He never gets the idea of what's behind the reason why I'm always able to smile in front of him.

I don't want him to know that I hate to cry alone, at the thought of being a useless parasite leaving under his wings. I don't want him to find out that I'm just a drug addict that makes him look like a fool trying to convince me that he truly loves me. And those negative thoughts would eventually turn into something bigger, something that'd make me walk staggering into the kitchen, to where we kept our knives.

I always promise myself that I need to keep on fighting, but sometimes, feeling enough was never enough. The more I convince myself that I can be happy with him in this full-of-twist life, the more those monsters crawl onto the back of my mind. I hate being whispered that I'm not good enough for him, and anybody else and that I don't deserve the love I've been dreaming of getting. It hurts, it's killing me inside. It feels like its thorns are ripping through my lungs as I try to slide the knife into my arm-

"What the fuck are you trying to do?!"

Jung Jaehyun opens the door as the exhaustion started to dart away from his body. He expected his lover to be greeting him with those lovely eyes, and a bear hug would be nice. But what he found as soon as he reached the kitchen has made his senses almost flying out of his mind.

She dropped the knife just as she heard the panic in his scream, eyes red from the fear of death. Scattered on the floor, there she is, sitting weakly while coming into a realization that she almost broke her own promise, to keep on fighting. "J-jae..."

Jaehyun immediately runs toward the poor woman. He quickly scoops her into his arms, hugging her close to make sure that she feels safe. His eyes stutter in the fear of losing her, worries start to creep into his brain about what if he was a minute late, or so. He sighed in relief in her ears, whispering a string of "Oh my goodness" as an indication of ease that she's still here with him.

He loves her with all his might, but why would she doubt him?

Loving Jung Jaehyun is not easy, as the journey wasn't even close to that yet. The first step is to love me first, to accept who I really am, and to forgive what I had in the past. Syringes and pills slowly disappear from my life, just after I found out that telling him and a professional my every story would help much better.

I learned how to see the future ahead, with the help of a man whom I'm trying to love dearly with all my imperfections. He no longer promises me things like he used to before, though it sounds so much reassuring whenever I hear them, but now his actions directly and clearly tell me that I'll be alright. We'll be just right. And I'm still learning to believe in myself and to believe in him as well.

I love you, Jung Jaehyun. I love myself, too.

NCT 127 Masterlist

Jaefluenza navigation

#nct #nct 127 #nct 127 angst #nct 127 fluff #nct 127 scenarios #nct 127 jaehyun #jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun angst #jaehyun smut #jaehyun fluff #jung jaehyun scenarios #jung jaehyun #jaehyun imagines #nct x reader #jaehyun x reader #nct 127 writings #neowriters #neowritingsnet #cznnet

[losingmymindtonight]

been on a for-your-own-good imposed exile from my phone & social media since Friday, so what’s a gal gonna do except eat pizza, reread The Inheritance Cycle, and finish old fic drafts?

I humbly present: Peter can’t sleep, but Tony’s a father now, and he’s got a few tricks up his sleeve.

--

Peter was okay.

He was. That wasn’t even him being self-sacrificing (like May thought) or deferring some kind of PTSD (like Tony thought) or anything. Most of the time, he was totally, completely, undeniably okay.

As a general rule, he just didn’t think about Thanos. He was too busy for that, with planning for his school’s Europe trip and patrolling and learning how to be a big brother to Morgan and resettling a whole apartment with May and rediscovering the absolute thrill of being alive along with the other fifty percent.

He had a good life, and considering everything that had happened, he was so, so lucky.

So, Peter was okay. Despite what Tony and May seemed to think.

He only ever had problems when the sun fell.

Vigilante by day, anxious wreck by night, he thought, more than a little bitter.

There was a bone-aching frustration that came with insomnia. He couldn’t sleep, but he was tired. God, he was so, so tired. His eyelids creaked, his face was tight and worn. Every inch of him was screaming for rest.

And yet, well, here he was: awake, staring at the ceiling, mind swirling down the inescapable drain of death throes and battle heat and the memory of his DNA vibrating apart.

He clenched his fists, then slowly pried them apart. His wrists hurt, yet his webshooters were comfortingly cool on his bare skin.

“Mister Parker,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. suddenly said, and Peter still jumped despite the fact her volume had been lowered and pitched into her softer night mode. “I apologize for the intrusion, but per my protocols, I am to alert Boss if you or Morgan are awake for longer than thirty minutes from the hours of 11:00 pm to 6:00 am. I thought it was only fair to warn you that he is en route to your bedroom and you should be prepared for his arrival.”

There was a time when an alert like that would’ve filled him with annoyance. A time when he would’ve met Tony at the door with a sharp reminder of, I’m almost an adult, I can take care of myself, on his tongue. Now, though, he just felt a dull splash of surprise.

“Mister Stark has rules for if I’m awake?” He asked the ceiling, blinking slowly at the smooth molding. It was different than the popcorn texture in his apartment. Probably easier to deal with when it came to painting.

As if on cue, his door swung open. A soft, yellowish bar of light flashed over his sheets and then collapsed in on itself with a distant click. Huh. So Tony thought that this needed to be a private conversation. 

“It’s called the Cradle Protocol,” Tony offered, and despite the fact that Peter hadn’t actually looked in his direction yet, he could hear the man’s smile in the warmth of the words, like curling into a fireside on a winter’s day. “You know, in case you were wondering.”

“I wasn’t.”

“Oh? Thought you spent most of your life wondering about pretty much everything.” His bedframe creaked as Tony settled down near his hip, and suddenly Peter didn’t have much of a choice but to stare up at the man, taking in the burn scars on his face and the gray in his hair and the quiet love in his eyes. “That’s what kids are best at.”

“I’m not really a kid anymore,” he whispered, but not a single inch of the words felt defiant. God, he wanted to be a kid again. He looked back on the moments he’d spent racing to adulthood and wanted to cry. Wanted desperately to hit rewind on all of it.

“All of us are kids, in the end,” Tony said, like it was the easiest thing in the world. “And you’ll be my kid forever. Sorry. No exchanges or returns on that policy. It is how it is.”

Tony’s thumb brushed soothingly over his cheek as he spoke, and the contact was rough and calloused and so intensely familiar that Peter let his eyes squeeze shut against it, swallowing hard.

“I don’t want to exchange it,” he whispered, and somehow he felt a little ashamed to admit it. Like he was rearing up against the order of things. Or, like he was admitting the truth in a space where untruths were expected.

There was a pause. Peter blinked his eyes open again, and saw that Tony’s gaze had drifted away from him. He was looking up at the headboard, soft curves of sadness mellowing his face.

Finally, he breathed, eyes tracing their way back to Peter’s own, gentle yet intense.

“Why aren’t you asleep, Peter?”

It was a redundant thing to ask, and both of them knew it. There wasn’t a person in the world who couldn’t guess the why of that question. There were probably a million different people all around the world staring up at a million different ceilings, all cold-eyed and shivering because of the same goddamn reason.

“I don’t know,” he lied.

Was it still lying if everyone knew that what you were going to say was a lie before it even left your mouth?

Tony just nodded, like those three words had told him everything that he’d needed to know. For all Peter could figure, maybe they had.

“Alright.” Tony patted his thigh through the blankets, then stood. “C’mon. Get up.”

It probably said a lot about him, or maybe more about his relationship with Tony, that he was already climbing out of bed even as he muttered a halfhearted, “where’re we going?”

“On a mission,” Tony said, gently tugging one of Peter’s oldest and softest hoodies out of his closet and pushing it against his chest. “Put this on.”

He did as he was told, tottering lazily into the hallway, too exhausted to do anything but follow.

“What’s the mission?”

Tony glanced back just long enough for Peter to see the corner of his mouth quirk up. “I need to put my baby to sleep.”

If he hadn’t been so goddamn tired, he would’ve picked up on the wryness in Tony’s voice. As it was, he blinked hard, brain whirring against the fogginess.

“‘S Morgan awake?”

The question startled a bark of laughter out of Tony. “God, Pete. I can’t believe you’re even managing to walk in a straight line right now.”

They were at the front door, now, and Tony snatched the car keys off of their hook in the entryway and ushered him into the cool night air. Cricket chirps swelled all around them. Peter let his eyes drift shut at the sound, then smiled when he felt Tony snag the edge of his sleeve, gently guiding him over the gravel.

“Ought to get this paved, huh?” Tony muttered, almost to himself, but Peter let the words fall over him anyway. “Would make life a hell of a lot easier when we got those summer monsoons. Plus, less of a tripping hazards for the kiddos, especially when they’re half asleep.”

“‘M awake,” he protested.

“I know,” Tony said, almost under his breath. “I’m working on it.”

Peter heard a beep as one of the cars unlocked, and he forced his eyes back open. They were standing in front of Tony and Pepper’s minivan, something which Peter still couldn’t quite wrap his head around. Tony Stark owned a minivan. Sure, it was a nice minivan, with leather seats and F.R.I.D.A.Y. installed and parking sensors, but it was still a minivan.

“C’mon,” Tony muttered, using the hand that wasn’t braced against Peter’s back to pull open the passenger’s side door. “Slide in.”

He let Tony manhandle him into the seat, even though he could’ve easily done it on his own. The exhaustion had stripped his stubbornness away. The only thing left was a yearning urge to be protected, cradled, loved.

It was good, he supposed, that those three roles seemed to be Tony’s favorites to fulfill.

Tony got into the driver’s seat, then double-checked Peter’s seatbelt twice before starting the car. He cracked the back windows, and the cricket chirps and nature swell mixed hypnotically with the buzz and hum of the engine. Peter closed his eyes and took a deep breath, turning his face in Tony’s direction when he felt the man’s eyes on him.

“You’re supposed to be looking where you’re drivin’,” he murmured, knowing that his smile was all drowsy and lopsided. He could feel them moving, though, so he wasn’t wrong.

“Nobody’s out this late.”

“Still need to stay on the road.”

“Oh, hush. I’ll take no driving smack from the child with a learner’s permit.”

He yawned. “Passed the test.”

“You sure did,” Tony murmured, pride warming the words. “I’ve got that picture that May took after hanging in my office.”

“I know.” A shard of longing pierced his chest. “Felt normal that day. Jus’ for a bit.”

He opened his eyes just in time to see guilt cascade over Tony’s face. Whoops. He really hasn’t meant to make his mentor sad. He was just loopy from all the sleepless nights, wading through the detachment weighing in his head. It was hard to stay conscious and keep his filter all at once.

“I’m so sorry, Peter,” Tony said, hands gripping the wheel so tight that his knuckles flashed white under the occasional streetlamp. “I wish I could take it all away.”

Peter just blinked. God, he was tired. His brain ached with it.

“You can’t.”

And Tony couldn’t. Peter knew that. Iron Man could do a lot of things, even survive the constriction of space, but he couldn’t void memories. Nobody could.

“No,” Tony admitted, and even through the fuzziness in his head, Peter found the wherewithal to be surprised, “but I can be here.”

Peter let his eyes drift shut again. Somehow, that was all the fixing that he needed Tony to do. I can be here.

That was it, wasn’t it? It was why the memories of Thanos rung so clear at night and pitched silent during the day. Because Peter hadn’t really been afraid of dying during the battles. He’d been terrified, horrified, by the thought of being left alone.

And at night, in his bedroom, walls and doors and locks between Tony or May or anybody else who would stave off the quiet, that fear was so much easier to taste.

He was so, so afraid that at the end of it all, he’d been irreversibly alone.

“Can you talk to me?” He whispered.

He just wanted words. Something substantive in the nothingness of night. And Tony was only ever speechless when there was something to be afraid of.

He’d... He’d been silent when Peter had died. Had been silent after he’d done the Snap, too. The look on the man’s face, the lack of speech in the haze, had rung in Peter’s nightmares ever since.

He could hear the roughness in Tony’s voice when he responded, and Peter couldn’t help but wonder if he was thinking about his silence on Titan, too. If he even remembered the stillness from the Compound’s dust.

“Of course, buddy.”

And he did. He talked about Rhodey and college and the first time he met Happy. Peter found himself drifting in and out as he rambled, although he never seemed to fully wrap his hand around true sleep. He’d nearly get there, Tony’s words fading into something he couldn’t quite comprehend, and then he’d recognize the shift and jolt himself out of it.

Somehow, it was even more frustrating than what he’d been doing before. At least then, he’d known he wasn’t going to get any sleep. Here, it kept dangling in front of him. And to make it worse, every aborted attempt at sleep felt like a failure. Like he’d screwed it all up, despite all the effort Tony was putting into helping him.

“Sorry,” Peter suddenly muttered, blinking away his most recent near-rest. Tony fell silent. “Sorry, sorry.”

“Shh, Pete,” Tony soothed, right hand abandoning the steering wheel and settling on his arm. “It’s not your fault. We’ll get there.”

“‘M trying.”

“I know you are. You’re doing great.”

For a breath, Tony just rubbed Peter’s arm, breath and nature filling the car.

“I used to do this for Morgan, you know,” he finally said, voice low. “Learned it within the first month. Think I must’ve put a thousand miles on the car, driving around just for some precious minutes of peace.”

“Ben used to drive me around when I was little,” Peter mumbled, twisting until he found a comfortable position: draped over the center console, head just inches away from Tony’s elbow. The console was leather and padded, which made it a surprisingly good pillow. Plus, he was close enough to pick up the steady thrumming of Tony’s heartbeat. “I didn’t like sleeping after my parents died. Car always worked, though. Dunno why.”

Tony’s hand settled on the top of his head, and a swoosh of comfort whisked from that one point all the way down to his toes. “It’s the vibrations from the engine. Low frequencies make us tired. It mimics the sensation of being rocked to sleep.”

He smiled. Trust Mister Stark to turn anything into a physics lesson. “‘S science,” he muttered.

Tony’s thumb swiped over his temple. “It’s science,” he repeated. “Do you want another story?”

Hmm. Yes. And he wanted Tony’s hand to stay right there, too. The tips of his fingers kept brushing over the nape of his neck, and the pattern was nice. Slow. The kind of monotony that was so easy to get lost in.

“Mm.”

“How about a special one?”

“Mm.”

“Well, since you asked so nicely,” Tony said, laughter in the words. He sounded pleased, though. Peter was too busy falling asleep to figure out why. “Y’know, I never went to Queens much when I was a kid. Howard wasn’t a big fan. And then I didn’t have much of a reason to go once I was an adult. Everything I needed was in Manhattan or Malibu. Point is: imagine how surprised I was when a web-slinging vigilante actually forced me out there…”

Peter drifted off long before he could recognize that the story was about him.

--

Peter half-surfaced to the quiet thud of a car door opening, and the crunch of shoes on gravel.

It wasn’t the usual way he woke up. He’d gotten used to jolting into consciousness, sweat slicking his trembling limbs and damp sheets snarling all around him. It was a violent thing, full of heartbeat and rib-ache.

But this was soft. Warm. Safe hands slid under the back of his neck, his seat tilting back until he was lying almost completely flat. On instinct, his eyes flickered open, and he grinned sleepily at Tony, who shushed him in a barely-there murmur.

“Nice and easy, Pete,” Tony said, voice warm and safe and already blurring. “Now be a good boy and go back to sleep.”

And for once in Peter’s life, it was as simple as that.

#i guess being on tumblr technically infringes on my No Social Media thing #but #a gal only hopped on to post this so #it was for humanitarian reasons #anyway i hope u enjoy my garbage #sleepy peter is all that matters #feel quite proud of how i delivered on that here #tony & peter #tony stark #peter parker #irondad #losingmymindtonight writes #tw: insomnia #tw: PTSD #tw: nightmares

[ecclais-fouoras]

Sometimes moving on is good

Ch7 and 8

Ch6 here

Smut

When you finished working on a piece you would always go back to diane's house. It was a bit like coming "home", you two had never vocalized if or which house you were moving into. The two houses were pretty close, you could build a corridor between the two and make it one.

This evening you were pretty productive and finished painting earlier and after cleaning you got going.

When you arrived quietly you didn't know where diane was so you went looking for her, Passing her room you heard your name in what sounded like a moan, at first you were a bit worried was she having a nightmare ?

So you opened the door softly to wake her up but instead found her on the bed hands down her body.

"Mmm..Oh..y/n...yes" she whimpered fingers rubbing her clit under her panties, and pinching her nipples with her shirt pushed up to expose her pretty boobs.

"Mm...you should take the panties off it'll give you a better access and me a better view of your sweet pussy."

"OH MY GOD Y/N GET OUT"

She yelled as she threw you a pillow.

"Hey, hey chill, don't go here attacking me babe"

She took another one but this time didn't throw it but buried her head in it and groaned in frustration. You went closer to her and lifted the cushion to find her.

"Diane ?...babe..."

"What !" She spat angrily.

"HEY calm down i didn't do anything to you why are you so mad ?!"

After a short pause she answered.

"Nothing..I'm sorry I just feel embarrassed and frustrated."

"A type of frustration i can help you with or...?" You said in a flirty tone.

"Grrr stop that. This is exactly why I'm embarrassed."

"What ? That i cought you masturbating ?"

"Don't"

"Really ? Is this what this is about ?"

" Please stop I'm already ashamed enough as it is. I don't want you to talk about it.

"Honey... there's nothing to be ashamed of"

"YOU COUGHT ME MASTURBATING I'DD SAY THAT'S PRETTY EMBARRASSING"

She couldn't even look at you and threw her head in the pillow once more.

"No..no..no more of that diane look at me "

"No.."

"Please ?"

She lifted her gaze to meet yours and you stroked her cheek.

"Diane there is nothing to be ashamed of -no let me finish- masturbating is perfectly natural, and it's not like that's anything I haven't seen before. Your beautiful and you have every right to touch yourself. With or without me by the way, even if i'd rather watch you while your doing it... But that's beyond the point. You do what you want with your body, as long as you're not putting it in danger or sleeping with someone else and didn't tell me. Now why are you frustrated, you said you were embarrassed and frustrated ?"

You asked your voice trying to be as soft as possible.

"I'm not telling y..i...i just... it's already embarrassing enough"

"I told you I don't judge you, It's not anything weird or shameful, you have no reason to be embarrassed i love you..."

"Okay...i love you too"

"So...what happened ?"

"I.. well I was trying to..you know...and I..."

"No i don't...what were you trying to do"

"Oh my god you make this so hard...can't we just drop it ?.."

"No."

"Why ??"

You looked at her and kissed her cheek.

"Well you are obviously upset and we need to talk about It."

"..."

"So..what happened ?"

"...mm...I was trying to...to come...have an orgasm by myself but i couldn't do it..what if I can't even make me cum alone ?"

She started crying slowly

"Hey...hey..hey babe shhhh" you sat on the bed, took her in your arms and caressed her bare skin under the shirt that had gone down.

"Diane there is nothing to be worried about, is it the first time you try ?"

"Yes..."

"Exactly for lots of people it's hard the first few times. You don't know what to do, or what to think about, you feel embarrassed and silly all these things make it difficult.

Orgasming isn't just about your body climaxing, you need a good head space and

To not overthink it. It's okay if you don't have an orgasm diane you aren't used to touching yourself especially alone."

She listened to you and her sniffling slowed down.

"Do you want to try again later ? With or without me ?"

"You don't mind staying ?"

"Of course i don't I'd be glad to give you a hand" you winked teasingly at her.

"In all seriousness if you want me there with you, i have absolutely no problem with it"

"I'm...not sure..it's just I fell that if you're here i would come because you're stimulating me...and i want to do it on my own"

"That's fine too...do you want to try now ?"

"But you're here ?"

''i can go downstairs and fix us some food or outside to garden, whatever you want"

"Can you go downstairs and cook"

"Sure...babe don't worry it'll come with time and practice. But you need to cut yourself some slack, relax. If you desperately want yourself to orgasm, there'll be to much pressure on yourself and you'll just keep edging yourself. Also If you need to watch porn that's fine too, you just need to find what you like. It can be imagination, visual or vocal stimulation." She took in the advice and you stood up to leave. Before you did you kissed her soundly and pinched her nipple as you caressed her hips.

"Well... I'll be downstairs if you need me. Have fun babe"

"Yeah..."

-------------------

After about 25 minutes you decided to go check on her. The food was ready and the table set.

You went upstairs and you heard her moan loudly. "AH YES...Mmm y/n FUCK"

She sounded like she was enjoying herself so you just sat on the bench in front of the door, cool not weird at all.

After a few minutes of moaning and breathing loud you heard her come.

You waited and she got out of the bedroom after a while.

"OH God y/n you scared me ! What the hell are you doing here. Have you been here all the time ?!"

"No ! No babe I just came two minutes ago to check on you since it had been 25 minutes and well..you were apparently enjoying yourself and i didn't want to disturb you"

"How did you know it wasn't going to last 25 minutes again ? You were just going to stay here for how long !?"

"I wouldn't have stayed 25 minutes babe. I heard you moan and knew you would come within 5 minutes."

"How did you know i didn't even"

"Hey stop being mad at me...I was just worried about you.."

"...I'm sorry"

"It's okay babe...and to answer your question you do this moan when your about to come that's different, it's lower pitched, breathless and then two little high ones, also your face softens before tensing up and your left brow goes up three times but I couldn't see that."

She laughed as she looked at you

"How the hell you know that you weirdo !"

You followed her in laughing and replied.

"Well I just listen and look at you when you come cause it's really hot, and it's just something I've noticed"

She moved forward and kissed you softly at first then opened her lips and your tongues danced around each other.

She sat on your lap in her panties and your hands flew to her hips. She grinded herself against you.

"You just spend thirty minutes touching yourself and you're still horny."

"..mm..yes, i want you to touch me now"

You lifted her and went inside the bedroom to lay her on the bed. She scooted closer to the headboard as you peppered kisses on her neck. "You're so beautiful like this"

She blushed before taking your lips in hers.

"I love you" you mumbled between kisses.

She pulled away and breathed "me too".

Your hands found her shirt and you pulled it over her head. "You're still not wearing a bra ? You naughty girl" you whispered in her ear.

"Mmm...yes...now fuck me... I'm begging you" you pinched her nipples and kissed her sternum.

"I like it when you beg me...keep begging sweet girl."

You went down her body nibbling the skin and running your hand on her skin while the other one cupped her breasts.

You took her underwear off with your teeth as you started up her body.

"Mmm...so wet little one"

"..Mmm..yes...all for you babe"

"Are you sure it's all for me ? Isn't that because your pretty fingers were inside your sweet cunt a few minutes ago"

You said as your fingers danced on her folds and she moaned.

"Oh..ah ! Yes y/n"

She was beyond soaked so you eased two fingers into her directly and sucked on her clit. You alternated between licking and sucking as you curled your fingers inside of her and after a few minutes she came hard, shaking and crying out your name.

"Well that was fast...maybe i should see how many times  i can make you come like that"

"OH GOD"

You pushed back three fingers and went back to sucking on her clit.

She came 4 more times and an hour later she broke the silence ;

"Well we should go downstairs the food's cold"

"Jokes on you i already ate, and it was delicious"

"Seriously you ate without me ?"

"No silly...I ate..you know what forget it explaining a joke ruins it"

"Ooh...you meant you ate me out ?"

"YES obviously" you said as you raised your hands in defeat.

"Come on babe, I made ravioli"

"Ooouuuh nice"

"You really have the best life"

"I know orgasms and raviolis, I'm living the dream"

You kissed her and raced to the stairs yelling

"Last one downstairs has to do the dishes !"

------------

Warning ⚠️: mention of abuse

"diane baby do you know where I put my brush ? I can't seem to find it anywhere"

You expressed as you went in the bathroom while she was under the shower.

"Y/n get out !" She said as she turned around to hide her back, unusual for someone, you usually hide your chest don't you ??

"What ?"

"I said GET OUT"

"WHY ?" she threw bottles of shampoo at you before you bend down so it wouldn't hit you in the head.

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU"

"LEAVE"

"NO"

"THEN I'LL KICK YOU OUT"

you didn't understand what got to her, she was usually so sweet and calm,  besides you had seen her naked already.

"It's nothing i haven't seen before diane !"

She didn't reply just kept throwing stuff at you. You remembered that this is how it started, getting mad at you for no reason, throwing stuff at your face, then apologizing. You had enough. You were shaking, scared she would be like her, you didn't run away so she could do the same thing. You had been through enough for that to happen again. You were done excusing people for their abusive behaviors. She stopped because there was nothing left to throw.

"DAMN Are you out of your mind !"

"OH QUIT being a little baby y/n"

"I'M BEING A BABY ?! YOU'RE THE ONE THROWING BOTTLES AT ME FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON !!"

"I TOLD YOU TO GET OUT !"

" AND I ASKED YOU WHY ?!"

"BECAUSE"

"WELL YOU'RE GOING TO BE HAPPY, I'M LEAVING, YOUR SUFF WILL BE IN A BOX OUTSIDE MY HOUSE IN AN HOUR."

"WHAT ?"

"OH YOU HEARD ME"

"WHY??"

"BECAUSE YOU SCARE ME ! DO YOU REALIZE YOU COULD HAVE HIT ME WITH THESE ?! "

"THAT WAS EXACTLY THE POINT"

"AND THAT'S EXACTLY WHY I'M LEAVING YOU" she tried to get out of the shower and get closer to you. But you moved backwards.

"NO YOU CAN'T, please don't go away, no one's ever stuck with me for so long before"

"You should have thought about that while I told you to stop throwing stuff at me. I'm done being someone's punching bag, and i can't give you that chance"

"What do you mean ?"

"I don't have to explain myself to you. Get dressed you're going to get cold."

"Baby... Don't leave me. I'm sorry i got mad...please y/n"

"That's exactly what they always say"

"Who's "they" y/n"

"Nevermind diane"

You tried to leave but she grabbed your shoulders and held you tightly.

Her wet skin hugging your clothes.

"You're going to get my clothes drenched diane ! Let me go"

"No, I can't bear the thought that you hate me"

"I don't hate you."

"I scare you"

"When your like this you do"

She started to cry softly

"Oh diane... i didn't mean to make you cry but you need to understand that I can't let you be violent towards me. Someone else might let it go, but i can't take that risk again" there was a short pause

"Especially when i don't understand what I did wrong, can you tell me diane ?"

She couldn't show you, she'd spent her whole life hiding it, not speaking a word, and there you are cracking her open, with your sweet words and open heart.

So she decided now was the time, she turned around and lifted her hair that wasstill wet. Drops of water spread down her bare back, pearling on the scars that were spread around in it by her mother when she was a kid.



You were speechless, you had seen these types of mark before, when your brother got cought for something he did to you, you'd have that conversation but that would be for another time.

"Wh...when ?...and who ? And why haven't I seen it before ?"

"Until i was 9...my mother...and I've never told anyone"

"And you didn't want me to see you that's why you got upset...i get it now"

"I still know i shouldn't have gone mad...I'm sorry"

She turned back and held you close as she cried.

"....My mom... used to get very angry at me, for no reason and she'd... beat me whenever she could..."

"I'm so sorry darling..."

"I'm sorry... for getting violent...y/n I really never wanted to hurt you" she said sniffling her words.

"I know...and I'm sorry that this happened to you... You didn't deserve any of it..it wasn't your fault."

"..I...never knew what I did to upset her so much"

You took her face in your hands and looked at her, her naked breast shivered against you. "Babe, listen to me. Nothing. Justifies. The. Beating. Or. violence. Against. Children. Or. anyone."

You sealed each word with a kiss.

"I never told you this, but my big brother John got beaten up by my dad and kicked out when he found out about something he did. And no matter how wrong vit was of him, I was still mad at my dad for doing that, beside it got him into more trouble than we deserved."

"What happened, what did he do ?"

"He strangled and stab me when i told him I liked women."

"How old where you?"

"12"

"Oh my god"

"I know, my mom called an ambulance and he pressed charges against my father."

"And you?"

"I was operated and he was a minor so the police said he couldn't be judge so i should drop all charges. What about you mom ? Did she go to jail"

"No she killed herself"

"Oh."

"Yeah i found her in the bathroom"

"Honey...I'm so sorry...did you go to therapy for everything ?"

"Yes, my dad took me"

"Was he a good man ?"

"Yes, but my mom had custody when they divorced and he lived far away, after she died he took me back and we moved to Connecticut."

She was in your arms now and trembled slightly.

"Darling you are cold, get dressed I'll be downstairs"

"So... you're not leaving me ?"

"No...but if you ever rase a hand on me i will not hesitate"

"I promise, i love you" you smacked her butt before your left

"I love you too, now get your cute ass in some panties"

#sarah paulson fanfiction #diane sherman x reader #diane sherman

[yayeetsonny]

Family~Krashlyn x Baby Reader

Prompt: Baby r is super short (shorter than Crystal lol), she is super close with Ali and Ash, they are like parents to her since her home life isn't great and her actual parents suck ass. She’s bummed about a father daughter dance and tries to hide it but Ash and Ali get her to spill. Ash saves the day

Requested By: Anonymous 

TW: Mentions of Neglect, verbal and emotional abuse and Anxiety. Brief depictions Verbal/emotional and brief physical abuse.

Y/N PRO//

I have always been jealous of kids whose parents are actually decent human beings. Jealous of those who have a good relationship with their parents and their mom and dad are actually nice to them and care about them. My parents are all about themselves, they never make time for me and I’m pretty sure if they had it their way they would have abandon me years ago. The only reason they haven’t is because of their precious “Image” They are some pretty powerful people in the business world and they don’t want their reputations ruined by any bad publicity. They see me as secondary to their company, and they are always leaving me alone in the house for long stretches of time. On the off chance they are home they make a point to tell me how pathetic I am and how I’m useless or worth nothing. They admonish me for my grades in school even when I’m doing really well and they call my social anxiety “ridiculous” and tell me I need to “get over it.” 

My life isn’t all bad though. I have made a pretty good name for myself, I’m a pro soccer player in the NWSL for the Orlando Pride and I play on the National team. Even at the tender age of 15, I have been afforded all these amazing opportunities and I have several college scholarships waiting for me. It’s amazing, and I have some of the best people in the world supporting me and my dreams. My Pride teammates of course and my national teammates as well, they’ve all be my anchors through everything but 2 people have always stood out above the rest. My teammates and ‘moms’ Ali Krieger and Ashlyn Harris. They are my biggest role models and the parents I’ve always wanted. I would not be where I am without them. I don’t speak very much around anyone but them but everyone else understands and doesn’t push me to talk.

Speaking of those two I’m currently smooshed in a Krashlyn sandwich as I make my way onto the field for Pride practice.

“Hey shorty! Good to see you!” Ash said 

“Hey baby girl, How was school?” Ali asked 

“Hey guys, good to see you too. School was okay.” I said once they pulled away

“Just okay? Why’s that?” 

They looked at me concerned. They both knew about my social anxiety and how sometimes school was really hard for me. I only shrugged in return.

“Come on Y/N, what is it?” 

They got me to move over to a bench and sit in between them.

I once again only shrugged.

“Please tell us?”

I let out a tired sigh but knew I could trust them with anything.

“ My anxiety was getting in the way of a lot today.” I said, suddenly finding my shoes very interesting. 

“Hey…”

Ali put her finger under my chin and gently lifted my head so we’d make eye contact.

“What have we talked about when it comes to your anxiety?”

“That it doesn’t define me and that it’s okay if I have hard days sometimes.” I mumbled

“And what else?” Ashlyn chimed in

“And that I can always talk to you guys about it and that I don’t need to be ashamed of it. I know, I just don’t want you guys to think I’m weak or-”

“Hey, no. Don’t do that to yourself.”

“We know not everyday is going to be happy, full of sunshine and rainbows. That doesn’t make you any less strong and it most certainly doesn’t make you weak.”

“Thanks guys. I needed that reminder.” I said wiping the tear that had started to fall.

“We’ll always be here to let you know just how great you are.” Ashlyn smiled softly at me

“You ready to practice or do you need a minute?”

“I’m ready.”

I stood up, shook out any extra nerves and Ali leaned down to kiss me on the head.

“You know, kid… you’re really short.” She laughed

“I know.” I giggled

“I’m pretty sure you’re shorter than Crystal.” Ashlyn chuckled

“No way!” 

“Yeah I think so! She’s what… 5’0 feet even? How tall are you?”

“4’9 and 1/2” I mumbled

“Oh man! You are short.” 

“It’s not funny!”

I pouted at them as they continued to laugh at me but after a moment I smiled and joined in.

“Okay, okay. Time to get to work kids.” Ali said

“Yes mom” Ash and I said

We made our way to the center of the field where the rest of our teammates were. Alex Morgan and Carson Pickett among them.

“Hey, Krashlyn! Mini Krashlyn!” Carson Pickett said, excitedly running up and giving us all a hug.

“Hi.” I said 

“Hey guys! Hey mini K, how you been?” Alex asked coming up and also giving us hugs.

The Pride and national team all called me “Mini Krashlyn” or “Mini K” because they know how close I am with Ash and Ali and they consider us “America’s cutest family.” It’s a little silly but mostly really cute.

I waved and gave her a thumbs up.

She smiled at me softly in return

We were interrupted by coach telling us to get to work.

“Alright ladies! Let’s go, you know the drill. Warm up and then get on the line!” 

I rolled my eyes at the thought of doing suicides or sprints first but did as told. After we warmed up I got on the line in between Alex and Ali. Ashlyn was on Alex’s other side and our other teammates filled the rest of the line.

“You ready, kid?” Alex asked

I nodded and smiled in return.

Coach Skinner blew his whistle and we were off. We started out with sprints and then moved to suicides. By the end everyone was panting and trying to catch their breath. Well everyone except for Marta, she looked barley winded.

I just shook my head at her.

She shrugged in return, smirking at me. After a quick water break we moved onto drills. We went through, passing, defending and shooting drills and then a scrimmage before coach called it a day. We said good bye to our teammates before Ash and Ali gave me a ride home.

“You did good today, kid.” 

“Thanks.”

The ride to my house was in relatively comfortable silence with just the radio softly playing in the background but no one seemed to mind. Once they pulled up and stopped at the curb I got out and grabbed my stuff from the back.

“Bye guys. I’ll see you tomorrow. Thanks for the ride.”

“Y/N, wait.” Ash stopped me before I could go any further 

“Are you sure, you don’t wanna just spend the night at our place?”

I had told them that my parents were out of town and they knew what that meant. They tried to let me handle things how I saw fit but since I was only 15 they worried about me being alone for too long and sometimes convinced me to stay with them for a few days. 

“Yeah, I’m sure. Thanks for the offer though. My parents should be home tonight.”

“Are you sure? They don’t seem to commit to being home on time and we-”

“Ash I’m good. I promise. See you tomorrow.” I cut her off

I could tell they were conflicted about leaving me here but I gave them the best reassuring smile I could and they let it go.

“See you tomorrow, Y/N. We love you.”

“I love you guys too.”

I closed the car door, they waited for me to unlock my door before driving off. When I got inside I dropped my bag on the floor and sunk down next to it. My parents were actually coming home today and I wasn’t really looking forward to seeing them. 

I knew I needed to clean the house a little bit, so after sitting for a while longer I got up and got to cleaning. After a couple hours everything seemed to be the way they liked it, spotless. So I deemed it done and went to put away the supplies. As I was doing that I heard the front door open and rushed to finish putting everything away. I then made sure I looked “presentable” and made my way to the front of the house.

“Hi, mom. Hi dad. How was your trip?” I said as I came face to face with them for the first time in 2 weeks.

“Is the house clean?” My father asked completely ignoring what I said

“Yes sir.”

“It better be.”

My mom did little to even acknowledge my presence, only going as far to hand me her luggage and point upstairs. She then followed my father as he inspected my cleaning job. I rolled my eyes but brought her bag up anyways. I would have taken my dad’s too but he hates when I touch his stuff.

“Y/N M/N L/N!” dad yelled from wherever there were in the house. Oh man, he sounds really mad.

I went downstairs, and after searching for a minute I found them in the guest room.

“Yes sir?”

“What is this?” He asked sharply, showing me his hand that had a white glove with dust on it.

“Dust, sir.” 

“And why is there dust in this room?” His voice was dangerously low.

“I-I’m sorry sir, I did the best that I could.”

“Yeah, well your best isn’t good enough! You worthless waste of space. Clean the whole house again!”

“The whole house? But sir it’s just a little dust, I can-”

I didn’t get to finish because I felt a stinging sensation in my cheek and only after did I realize he had slapped me. I was dumbfounded, he had never done that before, he’d only ever yell at me and break the occasional vase but I never thought he’d actually hit me.

“Don’t ever talk to me like that again.” He growled 

I didn’t realize that I started crying.

“Stop crying before I give you something to really cry about.”

I stood there, stunned. I knew my parents were awful but I never thought either of them would put their hands on me. I wasn’t sure what to do, I wanted to call Ash and Ali but decided against it because I knew that they would most likely want to kill my father for this. I really wish my parents loved me. 

I did what my father said and cleaned the whole house again but this time I paid extra attention to the guest room and when it was finished I decided to go to bed. I could have eaten dinner but I was too exhausted to even try.

The next day…

At school I stayed more to myself than usual and made no real effort to talk to anyone. I was just walking to my next class when a very cheery girl, who looked to be a senior came up to me and in a cheery voice said

“Hey! The father daughter dance is next week on Friday night, don’t miss out!” 

She then handed me a flyer and all but, skipped away. I stood there for a moment wondering how someone could be so… happy, then I looked at the flyer and it read

“Spring Father-Daughter Dance! Next Friday, the 18th at 7! Don’t miss it!” 

I just scoffed at the idea of attending it with my dad, there was no way he would take me or even consider it. I just crumpled up the flyer and shoved it in my bag. Stupid dance, stupid flyer. 

I carried on with the rest of my day continuing to keep to myself. As much as I hated to admit it; I really wanted to go to the dance. I always wondered what a father-daughter dance was like and wish more than anything my dad actually carried enough to go. I knew that would never happen so I just continued to sulk about it until the school day was over.

When I got home I wasn’t surprised to find that my parents were gone, again and they wouldn’t be back for awhile. So I decided to call Ashlyn and Ali. Ali picked up on the first ring.

“Y/N?”

“Hi Ali, um- well, m-my parents left and they won’t be back for a-awhile and I was wondering if I could stay with you guys? I know we normally just have dinner together on Tuesdays but I just thought that w-we could-”

“Y/N! It’s okay, yes of course you can stay with us. We’ll be there in 15 minutes.” She said cutting off my rambling.

“Okay, thank you.” 

I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding.

“Of course Y/N. See you soon.”

“See you.”

After we hung up I went to go pack a bag and I couldn’t help but have a bounce in my step as I did. The 15 minutes flew by and before I knew it I was meeting Ash and Ali out front and they were putting my bag in the car.

“You, okay?” Ashlyn asked coming around and giving me a hug

“Yeah. I’m okay.”

“How was school?” Ali asked as I got in the car.”

At the mention of school I went silent. I had forgotten about the sour mood it had put me in but now I remembered why and became sad all over again. 

“Y/N?”

“Hmm?”

“I asked you how school was?” Ali turned off the car and turned around in her seat.

“Oh, it was fine.” I said trying not to look at either of them.

“Are you sure? You seem upset about it.” Ash said

“Yeah I’m sure. Nothing upsetting me today!” I said hoping they would believe me.

Ashlyn PRO//

Ali and I shared a worried glance as we watched Y/N avoid our eyes. We knew something was bothering her but didn’t want to push, so we just let it go and see if she would tell us on her own. The drive back to our house was quiet and not in a good way. I really hoped Y/N would open up to us soon, I hated when things got awkward between her, Ali and I.

When we got back to the house Y/N got out, without a word, got her stuff and headed to the garage, waiting for us to open it to let her in. After Ali and I once again shared a worried glance we opened it so she could go in and she did, presumably disappearing to the guest room.

“Do you have any Idea what could be bothering her?” 

“Not a clue.”

“Do you think her anxiety is acting up?”

“No… Well maybe but we just talked about that yesterday. She knows she doesn’t have to hide that from us.”

“Hmm… I’m sure she’ll tell us when she’s ready.”

We talked for a few more minutes before heading inside. We decided to leave Y/N be and get started on dinner. After we were done we called her into the dinning room and we sat down to eat. We knew school was possibly a sensitive topic but since she said it was “fine” we decided to ask about her day anyway.

“So… learn anything new in school?”

“W-we learned about fossils.” She mumbled

“That’s cool! Anything exciting happen?”

She once again looked uncomfortable and I started to think this may have been a bad idea.

“N-nope. Nothing.” 

“Y/N are you sure you’re okay?” I asked

“Ash…” Ali said, putting her hand on my arm.

“What? I just want make sure she’s okay.”

“I’m fine. School was fine.”

“Why do you seem so bothered every time we ask about it then?” 

“I don’t know.”

She looked down at her shoes and I knew her facade was starting to waver. I didn’t want to push but I was starting to become really concerned.

“Hey… What is it?”

“It’s no big deal.”

“Anything bothering you is a big deal.”

“I’m fine.” She said but her voice cracked, giving away how she really felt

“We all know that’s not true. Y/N, please talk to us. It’s okay.” 

“There’s a father-daughter dance next Friday.” She said quietly 

“Oh, babe. Why didn’t you tell us?”

“Because it’s stupid. Not like I have a dad to go with anyways.” She said angrily 

“Hey, no… It’s not stupid, not if it was bothering you and you want to go. Do you?”

“Yeah but it doesn’t matter. My dad would never willingly go.” 

“I’m sorry he treats you so poorly it’s not fair.” I paused for a moment before coming up with an idea. I decided to keep it a secret for now and tell Ali later when Y/N goes to bed.

“It is what it is.” She mumbled

“Well, what if we had a movie night to cheer you up?” I said

“Thanks guys, but I think I’m just gonna go to bed. May I be excused?”

“Sure, kiddo.”

We smiled sympathetically at her as she made her way to the guest room. As soon as the door shut I turned to Ali with a big grin on my face.

“What?”

“I have an idea, but we have to keep it a secret from Y/N.”

“Okay? What is it?”

“We hold our own dance right here. On the same night as the father daughter one!”

“Ash, that’s brilliant!”

“i know, but shhh, we can’t let her know.”

“When did she say it was?”

“Next Friday.”

“Perfect. I have some calls to make.”

After talked more about the plan, we agreed to call all of our teammates, from both the Pride and the national team. I started with Alex since she was on both teams.

“Hey Al?” 

“Hi Ash, what’s up?”

“Well, I’m planning a dance for Y/N. With Ali’s help of course. It’s next week on Friday night. She’s bummed about the father-daughter dance at school and I thought we could throw a better one to cheer her up.”

“Ash that’s so thoughtful. Do you need help with decorations and that kind of stuff?”

“That would be great, yeah.”

“I’m on it and I’ll text everyone and tell them not to spill the beans.”

“Thanks Al.”

“Anytime. Ahhh, she’s gonna love it.” She squealed 

“I hope so. Bye Alex.” I chuckled

“Bye Ash.”

The plan was in motion and I couldn’t be more excited. We just had to keep it a secret for a week. That couldn’t be that hard.

It was very hard.

We had contacted everyone from both teams and the majority of them said they could make it, some were flying in a few days early, to come visit us and to say Y/N was confused and suspicious was an understatement. She had almost caught me talking about it on the phone several times but I convinced her it was something else. But when players started showing up she grew even more suspicious.

Hey Y/N, good to see ya!” Tobin said as she and Christen made their way into our house.

“Hi?”

“You not happy to see us?” She teased

“No, I am b-but Ash said no one was coming to visit.” she said turning to me, narrowing her eyes.

“Well we decided to surprise you, surprise!” Chris said

“So... You, Tobin, kelley, Emily, Lindsey, and Alyssa all decided to surprise me?”

“Yes?”

“Hmmm. Well thanks for coming. I’ve missed you guys.”

“We missed you too!”

The next few days flew by and by Friday everything was set to be perfect. Ali took Y/N out for the day so we could set everything up. Our Orlando Pride teammates, along with the national teammates who had flown in early were helping. Everyone else would be landing in a couple hours.

“Ash where should we hang this banner?” Christen asked, holding up the “mommy-daughter dance” banner we made.

“Right over there, above the fountain.” I said.

We were planning to have it in the backyard so everyone could fit into the space. We compiled a playlist of songs that Y/N loved along with a few that were about a mother and daughter so that we could have to special dance they had at the father-daughter dances. We also strung up some twinkly lights and made sure the yard would be as lit up as possible. While this was mostly my idea Ali and the others really helped me put everything together and I was grateful for all their help.

Ali and I agreed that I would dance with Y/N first and then she would.

“Ash, When are the others supposed to get here?”

“By 5:00. Why?”

“Ali says Y/N wants to come home now.” Alex said

“Shit. What time is it?”

“4:15.”

“Okay, that’s not too bad. But how are we gonna hide all of this?” I gestured to all the decorations and food that was set up.

“I have no idea.”

“Oooo I know!” Tobin said

“What do you got, T?”

“I’ll just convince her to play Mario Cart with me, distract her from looking at the yard, and give you, Ali and everyone else enough time to get ready.”

“That’s perfect! But what about you?”

“Oh, don’t worry. I have a perfect outfit already lined up and it’ll only take me 5 minutes to change.”

“Jeans and a T-shirt huh?”

“Yeah...”

Alex and I chuckled. Of course, classic Tobin.

Time continued to fly by and before I knew it, Y/N and Ali were home and Tobin whisked her away to play video games.

“Wow Ash, this is amazing.” Ali marveled at our handy work.

“Thanks babe, you think she’ll like it?”

“She’ll love it.” She kissed me gently.

5:00 o’clock came around and everyone else started to arrive. Tobin did a good job of keeping Y/N away from the commotion and I told everyone to come in through the side gate.

“You did good, Harris” Megan said, patting me on the back.

“Thanks, Pinoe.”

Everyone started to get ready, taking turns in the bathroom or our room. Ali and I the last to get ready. When I was sure everyone was good, and everything was set I texted Tobin letting her know it was go time.

“Okay everyone! Thank you for coming! Y/N will be out here any minute so get ready to surprise her.”

Everyone left through the side gate to wait until I gave them the signal to come in and I stood right in the middle of the yard, waiting for Tobin to bring out Y/N. I heard the door to the yard open and adjusted my bow tie when I noticed it was crooked.

“Okay kid, don’t peek yet okay?” I heard Tobin say.

“Tobyyy... where are we going?”

“Just one second... Okay open!”

When she did, the look on Y/N’s face was one that I would never forget. Her eyes sparkled as took everything in and when she saw me standing there, she started to tear up. She really started to cry when she saw the banner we made.

“Mommy-daughter dance. Ash... You did this for me?”

“Of course kiddo. I wanted you to have a special night tonight, even if it meant you didn’t go to the dance at your school.”

“This is so much better, thank you!”

She ran to me and jumped in my arms. I caught her with ease and spun her around, peppering her face with kisses as she giggled.

“Anything for you baby girl.”

“Where’s Ali?”

“She is here, that’s actually the other part of the suprise. Ali! Guys!” I called out to them.

Everyone walked through the gate, Y/N gasping as they did.

“Oh my god. Guys?! What are you all doing here?”

“Well... we know this is a mommy-daughter dance but we wanted to be here for your special night.”

“Thank you!”

“We wouldn’t miss this for the world.” Alex said softly

Y/N PRO//

I was overflowing with emotions, I had never felt so loved in my life. I hugged everyone and thanked them for coming before finally getting to Ali. She smiled at me with tears in her eyes and opened her arms, which I quickly ran into.

Ali... how can I thank you?”

“Save a dance for me?” She giggled

“Of course.”

“As much as I would love to chat with you, I think someone is waiting for you on the dance floor.” She said pointing at Ash. I looked back at her hesitant to leave.

“I don’t mind at all. Go have fun, we’ll dance soon.”

“Thank you mama, I love you.” I said before kissing her on the cheek and running off to dance with Ashlyn. That was the first time I had ever called her mama but I thought it was a fitting title and her and Ash are the parents I’ve always wanted

I joined Ash on the dance floor and she signaled to someone to change the song to a slow one. She smiled down at me as she took my hands in hers. Our height difference made it so I was definitely going to be stepping on her toes but she didn’t seem to mind.

“Thank you for all of this, mommy. I was so bummed about missing the other dance but I couldn’t be happier.” I said softly. I saw suprise cross her face at the new name I had given her but she embraced it without hesitation.

“I’m so glad, little one. Your mama and I love you so much. We always will.”

“I love you both more than I’ll ever be able to explain. You guys are the parents I’ve always wanted and the family I’ve always needed.” I said getting emotional.

“Family. Always.”

//

Sorry for any mistakes - N

#uswnt imagines #uswnt #krashlyn #krashlyn x reader #ali krieger #ashlyn harris #alex morgan #christen press #tobin heath #megan rapinoe #carson pickett #orlando pride

[jamilelucato]

1.Beautiful [hog. heathers]

Summary: This story is based on Heathers, the musical. It’s set in Hogwarts, back in the last year Tom Riddle studied there. Y/N is a Ravenclaw student.

Pairing: Tom Riddle x reader (later on)

Heathers Series || Musical Hogwarts List A/N: first chapter! Here you get a vision of this world I built but soon Tom will make an appearance. Hope you enjoy it! If you wanna be tagged, ask!

Tag List: @just-an-outstanding-auror​ @starcrossedyanderes​ @doctorriddle​ @cchris-a​

---

September 1st, 1943:

Dear diary, I believe I’m a good person. You know, I think that there’s good in everyone, but—here we are! First day of senior year! And uh... I look around at these kids that I’ve known all my life, and I ask myself—what happened?

Another year back at Hogwarts. Your parents were excited — you, not so much. Not that the school wasn’t great, but you just couldn’t take the other students anymore.

Your family was pureblood and that generally meant some sort of status. Not anymore — the most popular kids in Hogwarts were either half-bloods or muggle-borns, so you and some fellow friends that were also purebloods were generally bullied. They saw you as potential threats, and you couldn’t understand why. It was not like purebloods wanted to see muggle-borns dead; most of you just didn’t want to mix the blood. 

One step inside the train and the gossip started:

“Freak!”

“Slut!” 

“Burnout!” 

“Bug-eyes!” 

You sighed on your way to finding an empty space to sit. You were so tiny, happy and shiny; playing tag and getting chased. Singing and clapping, laughing and napping; baking cookies, eating paste.

You looked inside one compartment and weren’t welcomed.

“Bull-dyke, get out!” screamed a large boy at you.

Well, diary, you continued later when you finally found a place to sit, then we got bigger, that was the trigger, like the Huns invading Rome.

“Oh, sorry!” you said the boy before leaving his cabin.

Welcome to my school, this ain’t no high school. This is the Thunderdome. Hold your breath and count the days, we’re graduating soon. A job will be paradise if I’m not dead by June!

You were almost reaching the end of the train, and you still couldn’t find an empty place.

But I know, I know, life can be beautiful; I pray for a better way. If we changed back then, we could change again.

We can be beautiful...

There were fewer students as you were walking, but still, none seemed so happy with the idea of sitting with you.

Things will get better soon as my letter comes from the Charms Specialization Center in France. Wake from this coma, take my diploma, then I can blow this town. Dream of ivy-covered walls and smoky French cafés...

“Watch it!” shouted a tall blonde boy that had bumped into you. You didn’t even notice, but he was angry, and, as a revenge, he made you drop your diary. “Ooooops,” he laughed.

You looked at the boy. It was Ram Sweeney. Third-year as Gryffindor’s beater and seventh year of smacking kids, and being a huge... “Dick,” you whispered, suddenly angry for having to get the diary from the floor.

“What did you say to me, skank?”

Shit, he listened. “Aah, nothing!” you quickly got out of the way.

You know, diary, we were kind before; we can be kind once more. We can be beautiful...

An empty cabin at last! You sat down as fast as you could, scared it could disappear. A girl walked in just after you, and, for a moment, you were frightened.

“Hey, Myrtle!”

Myrtle was the only one you could call your friend at that place. Both of you were from Ravenclaw and had a lot of fun together, even though you two had some different perspectives on life.

“Hey,” she smiled, sitting next to you.

The train trip wasn’t much fun, but after Myrtle and you found a place to sit — and nobody tried to take you two out —, things were more peaceful.

School, on the other hand, was the same nightmare as always.

Professor Dippet said a couple of nice words before the start of the first feast, kind words about how to treat each other. For a second, it seemed as if everybody listened and were committed to obeying. But as said, it didn’t last the whole second. When the Headmaster finished his speech, people were back at their normal mean behaviour.

Days passed like a blur, or at least, you pretend that was how it went. You tried not to focus on the offensive words the students called you and Myrtle, but sometimes it was just too much.

“We on for book night?” asked Myrtle while leaving the Great Hall and walking towards the dorms.

“Yeah, you’re supposed to be with them,” you replied, smiling slightly. Myrtle had a way to trick the librarian that you never managed to have.

“Got us the ‘The Princess Bride’,” she smirked, making you giggle.

“Ho-ho-ho, again? Wait, don’t you have it memorized by now?”

“What can I say? I’m a sucker for a happy ending” Myrtle crossed her arms and squeezed herself as if she had been hugged by a prince.

So different from you, but yet, the only friend you had.

“Myrtle Crybaby! Hoow!” Kurt Kelly screamed, knocking Myrtle to the ground.

Kurt Kelly was the famous Chaser from Slytherin. The smartest guy on the team, in your opinion, but that was like being the tallest dwarf.

“Hey! How dare you?!” you barked at him, helping Myrtle to get up. She was lived red, ashamed of the situation.

“I’m sorry, are you actually talking to me?” Kurt smirked in a mean way, challenging you.

“Yes, I am. I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on my friend. You’re a high school has-been waiting to happen. A future human house-elf,” you hoped your face was as severe and furious as you were inside.

Kurt waited for you to end your speech before confidently pointing something on your face. “You have a zit right there,” he said and laughed, followed by all the other kids around you.

November 13rd, 1943:

Dear diary, why do they hate me? Why don’t I fight back? Why do they act like such creeps?

Why…

You looked around the room, making sure everybody was already asleep. Myrtle was even snoring, which made you giggle in the dark.

Writing a diary was a private thing for you, but there weren’t many ways to be in private in Hogwarts.

Send me a sign, God! Give me some hope, here! Something to live for!

***

The next day promised to be as tedious as the day before, but something was different. At first, you thought it was just the change of seasons — the cold air of Winter. But it wasn’t all that.

Classes were nice. You liked your Professors, at least when they were teaching, they were neat.

You ate lunch at the Great Hall at the Ravenclaw table, just like all the days before. But that feeling in your stomach of something unusual was still there.

“Going to the toilet, okay?” you told Myrtle before leaving. In fact, there was nothing you wanted to do there except splash water in your face and see if things went back to normal.

That was when the Heathers walked in, and you hurried to close yourself behind a door, too terrified to face them.

The Heathers was a group of girls that floated above it all.

Heather McNamara was the hot witch form Hufflepuff. Her dad is loaded— one of the wizards with more money, but he was a muggle-born, so your family usually didn’t talk about him.

Heather Duke was the head girl from Slytherin, with no discernible personality, but blessed with an incredible body.

And Heather Chandler, the Almighty. She was a mythic bitch from Gryffindor and had everyone at her feet.

They’re solid Teflon—never bothered, never harassed.

I would give anything to be like that, you thought, lamenting in the toilet.

You sit in quiet, listening to their conversation. One of the girls rushed to the toilet, and you heard her vomit.

“Grow up, Heather. Bulimia is so ‘37,” said one of the Heathers, and based on her tone — such leaderlike— you guessed that was Chandler.

“Maybe you should see a doctor, Heather,” the other Heather suggested.

The one vomiting exhaled loudly before answering. “Yeah, Heather. Maybe I should.”

“Ah, Heather and Heather” oh shit, you gasped, recognizing that voice immediately, “...and Heather. Perhaps you didn’t notice the time with all the vomiting. You’re late for class.”

That bossy voice belonged to Ms Fleming, the second in command when the Headmaster wasn’t around, and also identified as the Herbology Professor. And knowing her, she was about to punish the girls.

Noticing you kept your diary in hands, you took a piece of paper out and scribbled on it.

“Heather wasn’t feeling well. We’re helping her,” H. Chandler told the Professor.

“Not without a hall pass, you’re not,” you could feel Ms Fleming was smiling even though you couldn’t see her. “Week’s detention.”

Done!, you thought before rushing out of the toilet.

“Um, actually, Professor Fleming, all four of us are out on a hall pass. Christmas committee,” you informed, getting out of the toilet, keeping a straight face and handing her the paper.

Professor Fleming took her time to analyze the piece of paper, and you held your breath until she finally returned it to you.

“I see you’re all listed. Hurry up and get where you’re going.”

Heather Chandler was staring at you like you were an abnormal animal she had just discovered, but you couldn’t tell if that was good or bad.

“This is an excellent forgery. Who are you?”

“Uh... y/N y/L/N,” you fastly replied. “I crave a boon.”

H. Chandler raised a brow at you as if you made no sense. “What boon?”

“Um, let me sit at your table at lunch. Just once. No talking necessary,” Heather remained silent, so you continued, “if people think that you guys tolerate me, then they’ll leave me alone...”

The first Heather to laugh was Chandler, of course, but it didn’t take more than a second for the other two to follow. It was as if they needed Chandler’s permission to laugh.

“Before you answer, I also do report cards, permission slips, and absence notes,” you added, hoping this would change their view.

Heather Duke widened her eyes, raising her eyebrows at an abnormal height. “How about prescriptions?”

“Shut up, Heather,” H. Chandler’s reprehension came quickly.

“Sorry, Heather,” H. Duke ducked, almost embarrassed.

The three Heathers exchanged a look, planning something. You shivered — your destiny was in their hands, but, unfortunately, that rarely meant a promising one.

Chandler stepped forward, looking you up and down.

“For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure.”

“And you have a symmetrical face,” added Heather McNamara, holding your face with one hand. “If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull, I’d have matching halves. That’s very important.”

Heather Duke frowned her brow.

“Of course, you could stand to lose a few pounds,” she was one to talk — always vomiting what she ate.

Heather Chandler pulled the other Heathers away, pulling you by the hand. “And ya know? This could be beautiful,” she seemed to investigate what was lacking on your face. “Mascara, maybe some lip gloss and we’re on our way. Get this girl some blush; and Heather, I need your brush. Let’s make her beautiful.”

McNamara agreed with a smile, but Duke was pretending not to care. She never liked it when Chandler played the helper.

“Okay?” the Gryffindor asked before using the brush on you.

“Okay!” you agreed, a bit too loud.

Heather Chandler took you by the hand out of the bathroom and towards the Gryffindor Tower, with McNamara and Duke following behind. Your heart was beating so fast that you thought it would stop. It was one of your biggest dreams to be with the Heathers, and there you were, walking into Chandler’s room, unable to stop smiling.

She took a long time with your hair — which you didn’t even know needed a makeover. McNamara had the job of applying makeup, and she did it happily.

Heather Duke, however, wasn’t so thrilled to have to get you new uniforms.

“Oh, come on, Heather, just ask the boys — they’ll steal it for you,” said Chandler, rolling her eyes at her best friend.

“Fine,” she sighed before leaving.

According to them, there were more than just the traditional style of uniform, and they’d have lent theirs to you, but since you were a Ravenclaw, they had nothing in your house colour.

Heather Duke appeared half an hour later with the new uniform — all in blue, but so much more fashionable than the one you always used.

You didn’t bother asking from who she stole because that wasn’t the first wrong thing you were doing that day. The first thing was skipping the rest of the classes just to get the proper look.

***

“I reckon we’re ready,” said Heather Chandler, but she didn’t let you look yourself in the mirror. She said it would jinks it. “Now, let’s go. People need to know the new you.”

The new you. They didn’t even know the old you.

As soon as you stepped in the corridors, the whispered started, and this time, they weren’t making fun of you.

“Who’s that with Heather?” you heard someone ask.

The feeling of leaving everyone speechless was something you had never felt before and yet, so good. You and the Heathers stopped at the Courtyard — part of Chandler’s plan of introducing you.

“Y/N?!” you heard from behind and turned only to see Myrtle, holding her book with both hands and her mouth wide open.

She didn’t dare come closer to the Heathers so you could only wave at your friend. She didn’t look bothered, however. She knew once at the dorms, you’d tell her everything.

“You know, we should have found a Ravenclaw before,” said Heather Chandler. “It was the house missing from our group.”

“We were waiting for a girl named Heather though,” remembered the Slytherin Heather.

“Well, yes, but now we’re in our last year. Nobody new is ever coming, Heather,” said Chandler, practically ending the discussion so Duke could say nothing else.

You had never been so close to the Heathers before, so you had no way of knowing, but even though the three of them were at the top of the pyramid, it was H. Chandler who stood at the very top. You’d have to be careful if you wanted to be amongst them more often.

After all, you were a Heather now.

November 14th, 1943:

Dear diary, you know, life can be beautiful. You hope, you dream, you pray, and you get your way! Ask me how it feels lookin’ like hell on wheels... My God, it’s beautiful! I might be beautiful...

Oh, diary... It’s a beautiful frickin’ day!

#tom riddle #tom riddle x reader #tom riddle x you #tom riddle fanfic #rom riddle imagine #hogwarts #voldemort #voldemort x reader #harry potter #wizarding world #hp

[redrabbitspod]

READ OUR INTERVIEW WITH ROLLING STONE HERE:

(full, designed article. But if you don’t want to follow a magazine layout, read the transcript. Art by @bloodydamnit)

TRANSCRIPT BELOW THE CUT

Red Rabbits: The Rolling Stone Interview

Featuring Andrew Minyard, Neil Josten, and the Red Rabbits Team

By Angie Rodner

On a chilly Monday, Neil Josten and Andrew Minyard are standing side by side, looking at something on Andrew’s phone in our New York, Rolling Stone headquarters. The rest of the Red Rabbits team, consisting of Dan Wilds, Seth Gordon, Renee Walker, Robin Cross, Allison Reynolds, and pro Exy legend/honorable mention Matt Boyd, orbit around them. It's an interesting scene to take in, to say the least. No matter what they seem to be talking about, they all defer to the two hosts without any of them seeming to acknowledge it. 

I was lucky enough to sit down with all eight of them, and I’m not ashamed to say I’m a fan of the podcast and I’ve followed since Season 1. The story of Andrew and Neil (formerly known as Nathaniel Wesnisnki, the son of the Nathan Wesninski or the Butcher of Baltimore), and the revelation of their connection they’d shared as kids, was better than any true crime podcast I’d ever listened to. 

Now, the team takes on what they’ve dubbed ‘The Case of the Newark 9’ for their second season. It’s a case based around the hunt for a man known only as ‘Steven’, who they believe is responsible for a series of kidnappings and murders of young girls in and around the Newark area. They’re joined by Robin Cross, a victim and survivor of Steven’s, who is helping them investigate the case. 

I sat down with Robin and the other women of Red Rabbits first. 

What’s it been like to work on this podcast together? Was it strange to go from looking for Neil, to having him in the studio, to watching him and Andrew form the relationship they have?

Dan: It was strange, because in all honesty, it wasn’t strange. Does that make sense? None of us knew about the meeting they had as kids, but when Andrew finally told us, everything made a lot more sense. Really, they belong together. It was much weirder when they first got back and hadn’t acknowledged what was between them yet. We were all just kinda like... are y’all not seeing what we’re seeing?

Renee: They got there eventually.

How have things changed from Season 1 to Season 2? The cases are obviously different, but they still involve missing children. What’s the atmosphere like around the studio?

Dan: Tense.

Allison: I’m not even there that often and I can still feel it.

Robin: It is tense, but there’s also a sense of urgency. We know ‘Steven’ has another girl now, so it’s like every day that goes by is another day he has her... Another day we either find him, or we don’t.  

Mm... I can’t imagine how difficult that is. However, with that being said, the NYPD have made it pretty clear that they aren’t buying what you guys are selling. How does that make you feel?

Robin: I don’t feel anything about the NYPD. My anger is better placed elsewhere. I am angry. But the police didn’t listen to me when I was a kid and trying to tell them important information. Why would they listen to me now?

Renee: I think we all try and take our cues from Robin. Andrew and Neil are very careful to include her and get her opinion on certain things before moving forward. We’re not letting this thing with the NYPD deter us. 

Speaking of Robin then, what’s it like for you to have her on the team? As one of Steven’s victims that is, there with you in the studio?

Robin: Oh no. Say nice things about me.

Dan: Girl. [ laughs ] Honestly, she’s amazing. She’s my little sister and I’m not just saying that. I think we all kind of feel that way. I’ve never known a person as strong and determined as she is and I know - see she’s blushing! [ laughs again ]- I know she hates it when we talk about her like this, but it’s so true. She’s family now.

Renee: She is, and I think she brings a really unique perspective to the case. We have someone here who’s directly involved, who lived through it and can give us some idea of what the other girls went through. I think most people would really love to have that kind of resource during an investigation.

Allison: For sure. She’s even my muse for my fall line. Everything is going to be deep colors and fun modesty.

Seems like you’ve been properly inducted into the team, Robin.

Robin: [ smiling ] It feels amazing...

Now, last question. Are you confident you’ll find what you’re looking for?

All as one: Yes.

Speaking with the ladies was fun. They were easy and connected and you can tell that there was a real sisterhood in the studio that day. It was refreshing to see women supporting and helping each other thrive in such a competitive industry. There was a lot of laughter between them, and it was such a joy to be able to share it with them. 

-

My next interviewees were Seth Gordon, ‘resident TFN sound engineer/IT guy/anything to do with technology’, as he tells it, and New York Lynxes starting backliner, Matt Boyd. When I tell you I laughed throughout this entire interview, I’m being completely sincere. There was something about the way the two bounced off each other that had me smiling and understanding why they are both so well-liked. 

You guys are best friends aren’t you? I feel a bromance in this Chilli’s tonight.

Seth: Bet. Matt Boyd is my homie and BFFL. Do people still say that? Anyway, we have matching necklaces and everything.

Do you really?

Matt: No, not really, but I’d totally wear one if he gave it to me.

[ laughing ] Matt, how did you even end up here? I know you were friends with Neil, but I feel like the details on that are kind of murky.

Matt: I hit him with my truck. [ My jaw dropped ] No, really! I hit him with my truck in Midtown Manhattan when I was driving home. He refused to go to the hospital so I brought him back to my place to make sure he was okay. He didn’t leave after that.

Seth: Because you held him hostage? That’s the way I hear it.

Matt: Oh yeah, for sure. He takes up so little space, why not? [ laughs again ] No really, I did convince him to stay, but I just felt like he needed a friend. He was obviously running from something and he was scared. I just didn’t know from what or why at the time.

And when you found out?

Matt: Honestly? I just about shit myself, but it made so much sense. All the little questions I asked myself early on, finally had answers. 

I saw the interview you and Dan did with Essence. You guys look amazing together.

Seth: They are amazing together. It’s gross. 

Matt: Yeah, and you and Dion aren’t constantly fawning all over each other.

Is that Dion hovering nearby?

Seth: Yep, that’s my man. He’s amazing and fuckin’ fine as hell. Can I say fuck in this interview?

Sure.

Seth: He’s fuckin’ fine.

Seth, what’s it been like for you, putting together the shows? There’s been a lot of audio that’s hard for us as listeners to hear, and I’m sure there’s more we haven’t even heard. 

Seth: There is.

What’s that like for you to have to go through it all?

Seth: Really hard sometimes. There was some stuff in Season 1 we didn’t air that seriously gave me nightmares. It’s worth it, though. We found Neil and I think we’ll find Steven.

Are both of you confident in that fact?

Seth: Positive.

Matt: I think if anyone can find him, it’s Andrew and Neil. They’re determined and they’ll keep looking no matter what.

I believe them. 

Andrew and Neil were my last interview of the day, and a more determined pair I think I’ve ever met. 

Here’s the thing readers: They’re connected. It might make me a poor journalist, but I don’t know how else to explain it. At one point during the interview, Neil reached over to squeeze Andrew’s arm. At another point, Andrew reached over to squeeze the back of Neil’s neck. They were obviously a comfort to and for each other, and it almost seemed like they borrowed strength. It was intense and being able to witness it has been one of my favorite moments in my career.

So, let’s talk about this season before we get into everything else. You’re looking for a man you believe to be responsible for the disappearances of multiple girls in the Newark area. Do you feel like you’re any closer to solving the mystery than you were at the beginning?

Neil: Absolutely. We’ve gotten some really great tips and we think we’ve narrowed some things down. We don’t want to get too deep into what we’ve got at the moment, because we’re still investigating. But we’re confident in what we have.

What’s it been like working with Robin? I was able to interview her earlier, and she’s really something.

Andrew: She’s been the best resource we have. She’s incredibly strong and unbelievably quick. She’s taken this terrible thing that happened to her and turned it into fire, and it’s been amazing to watch. Most of the information we have comes from her.

The interview you guys did with her was absolutely chilling. I cried three times listening to it. How do you handle hearing these things? I feel like it’d be really hard not to take it home with you.

Neil: Yeah. It’s hard sometimes.

Andrew, I want to touch on the interview Riko Moriyama just did with Kathy Ferdinand and your response. What was that like for you, hearing Riko wrongfully expose something like that on live television?

Andrew: It was… I was stunned, I guess. That information was supposed to be sealed. My name was redacted. So I have no idea how he even got details of the case.

You’ve talked before about being in the foster care system. It sounds like you had a pretty rocky childhood.

Andrew: Yes.

Neil, I know yours was no picnic either. Do you think that this kind of... shared trauma, I guess, is part of why you two work so well together?

Neil: Yeah, partly. When we met as kids, I think a bond was cemented. We both knew how horrible adults could be to children. But now that we’re older, I think more than a shared trauma, it’s a mutual respect for that trauma. We both have shit, you know? I told Matt this one time and I didn’t really understand how true it was until recently, but we both have baggage that we share. We take each other’s on to lighten the load for the other. But, there are times when it gets really fucking heavy, and I think recently we’ve figured out that it’s better to lean on each other when that happens, instead of trying to carry it all ourselves.

Why do you think Riko felt the need to call you two out like he did? I know he mentioned Neil possibly being manipulated into the relationship.

Neil: [laughs]

Andrew: I wish I could manipulate him into having better taste in music.

Neil: My taste in music is fine. 

Andrew: It is absolutely not. And I don’t know why Riko feels the need to comment. I’d be interested to hear the reason. The things he said regarding Neil were ridiculous, and in his response, Neil has made sure to make that known. But the thing that really bothered me was his comments on mental health. He tried to basically call me unstable for seeking therapy and admitting that there came a point when I needed outside help. There are literally hundreds of thousands of people in this country who seek out therapy every year. There’s no shame in it and I’m unsure as to why Riko believes there is. Honestly, I’m shocked the Moriyamas haven’t released a statement. He’s their mouthpiece, after all.

Do you think they should apologize?

Neil: Yes.

Andrew: I think they should at least clarify. I’ve already heard people are planning to protest their new documentary and I don’t blame them. I wouldn’t want to give my money to people who think I’m less of a person because I struggle sometimes.

Speaking of struggle, let’s move back to the case. I know the NYPD has been giving you grief over your claims that the person you’re looking for is the same person that’s taken Haylie Clark. Robin, especially, seems completely certain. How does it feel to know law enforcement doesn’t have your back on this?

Andrew: Familiar. They’ve never had my back before, so why would they start now?

Neil: I’ve dealt with too many crooked cops to really take it seriously. I have no idea what their motivations are and to be clear, I’m not saying I think they’re crooked - I’m just saying that in my experience, the help doesn’t always come like it’s supposed to.

The rest of the team seems pretty confident in you two. They all said they absolutely believe you’ll be able to find him. Is it hard sometimes, not to lose faith?

Andrew: It’s hard all the time. But it doesn’t matter. We have to keep moving forward. We aren’t going to stop until he and Haylie are found. 

I think that’s really commendable and I look forward to seeing that happen. Now, tell me a bit about the team. Neil, since you came in at the end of Season 1, how did you find the dynamic as an outsider?

Neil: I didn’t really understand it in the beginning. Not really. It helped having Matt at my back for months prior, but I’ve never had the opportunity to make solid connections with people. So when I came into the studio, to this group of people who had known each other since college, it was overwhelming. 

Andrew: That’s funny, seeing as how they like you better than me.

Neil: It’s all the charm and charisma. 

[ laughing ] And now? You all seem really tight knit.

Neil: Now, yeah. We are. These people are my family.

Andrew?

Andrew: Yes?

Neil: She wants you to say something nice about the team.

Andrew: Every single one of them knows my coffee order, and it’s truly amazing that they can do what the interns cannot. [ he looks over at Neil, who’s tilting his head and raising his brows ] Oh, don’t look at me like that. Fine. We have a really strong team. I wouldn’t be able to do what I’m doing without them. Seth works harder than anyone I know, Dan keeps us all in line with just a look, Renee is the only reason I agreed to do this in the first place, Reynolds has a lot of money and she’s not afraid to use it for a cause she believes in, and Robin is the most inspiring person I’ve ever met.

And Matt?

Andrew: Who?

Neil: The guy that kept me alive for months while you were hunting me.

Andrew: [ rolls his eyes and shrugs ] He’s fine.

-

My take away from the interviews was this: these people will do whatever they need, in order to find their perpetrator. They believe in their cause, they hurt for these girls, and they’ll find justice for them in the end. They’re family, that much is clear, and I can’t wait to see how this ends. I can’t wait to say that I was there when it’s over.

Red Rabbits can be heard on iTunes, Spotify, Stitcher, and GooglePlay. You can follow the website at redrabbitspod.tumblr.com and twitter @redrabbitspod.

And as the Red Rabbits team always says, “Keep Searching”. I know I will.

#red rabbits pod #aftg #andreil #andrew minyard #neil josten #seth gordon #dan wilds #matt boyd #renee walker #allison reynolds #robin cross #article #media #rolling stone #interview

[hailhydra920]

Talking To The Moon (Steve x Reader)

Steve x reader

Warnings: Sadness. You might cry. Just warning you.

I know you're somewhere out there Somewhere far away I want you back I want you back

Steve let out a deep breath as he entered his room after a rough mission. He looked around the room, emptiness quickly settling. Taking the picture from his nightstand, he sat on the edge of his bed, gently running his fingers across the picture. It was of you and him. Giant smiles graced both of your features. Steve was behind you, arms wrapped around your waist, head on your shoulder. It was one of his favorite pictures.

"I'm sorry, doll." Steve whispered.

A tear rolled down Steve's cheek, splashing onto the picture. He wiped it off shakily.

"I should have been there. I...I should...I should have stopped them...before..." He broke out in shaky sobs.

My neighbors think I'm crazy But they don't understand You're all I have You're all I have

Steve had changed into some jeans and a plaid shirt, the picture back on its rightful space on his nightstand. He grabbed his keys, locking his apartment, before stepping into the cool night breeze.

"There he goes again." Ms. Tamrand muttered as she watched Steve. "He's gonna go to the market, buy some flowers, and talk to the moon like some mad man."

Ms. Tamrand's friend, Mrs. Kalright, nodded.

"He thinks she can hear him." Mrs. Kalright scoffed. "I think America is going down hill since Captain Crazy is still the leader of the so called Avengers."

"I'm ashamed to call him my neighbor." Ms. Tamrand snorted.

Steve heard the women talking about him. He heard them every time, but it never affected his routine.

At night when the stars Light up my room I sit by myself Talking to the moon

Steve thanked the man for the flowers, and gave him a generous tip, like always. Clutching his flowers tightly, his eyes wandered to the beautiful night sky. He found the bench he always went to and took his seat, blue eyes staring at the gigantic moon shining in the sky.

"Hi, love. I brought daisies, your favorite." Steve said waving the flowers slightly.

The stars by the moon seemed to twinkle a bit brighter after he said that. Steve smiled and clasped his hands together.

"I miss you so much." He whispered, his eyes glazing with water.

Tryin' to get to you In hopes you're on The other side Talking to me too

A warm breeze swept past him, as if telling him everything was going to be okay.

"Remember that time you fell in the lake?" Steve chuckled. "You got so mad because you had soaked your new jeans. You always looked so cute when you got mad."

Steve started talking about the fun times you had. Laughing and joking like he was speaking with a person who was sitting by him. It felt good to talk to let everything out and tell you about how his mission went.

Or am I a fool Who sits alone Talking to the moon Oh

People passed by him, giving him crazy looks. There was an occasional mother covering their child's eyes from a " ludicrous fool". Was he a fool? No. He knew you were on the other side, listening, clinging, to every word that spilled from his mouth.

"I know you're there love." Steve said, blue eyes twinkling with hope. "And I know you are listening to me."

I'm feeling like I'm famous The talk of the town They say I've gone mad Yeah I've gone mad But they don't know what I know

Steve walked back to his apartment, whispers and laughs trailing behind him. Once back inside, he collapsed onto his bed. A ping of his phone caused him to pick it up.

Bucky: You okay? Everyone's saying you're going crazy. You know you can talk to me about anything, right?

Steve ran his hand through his blond hair before typing a message back.

Steve: I'm fine, Buck.

Bucky: I don't know if you've seen the paper recently, but you're one of the top headlines. What's all this about talking to the moon?

Steve: I'm tired. See ya tomorrow.

Steve typed his last message and tossed his phone on his nightstand with a sigh.

"Goodnight, doll." Steve said looking at the moon one last time before closing his curtains.

'Cause when the sun goes down Someone's talking back Yeah they're talking back

Another rough day had passed, and Steve was ready to tell you all about the ups and downs of his day. It would have been your 5th wedding anniversary. Steve dressed nicely this time. He put on a crisp, white, button up shirt, and a slick, back tie, and a pair of dress pants. He combed his hair, gelling it slightly, before slipping on a leather jacket. Steve couldn't wait to celebrate with you, and he knew you couldn't either.

At night when the stars Light up my room I sit by myself Talking to the moon

Steve walked to get his usual flowers, and huge grin on his face.

"A bit fancy today, aren't we?" The flower man asked.

"It's our 5th anniversary." Steve said as the man smiled.

The man knew who Steve was. He talked to the moon. Steve didn't just bring great business, but he wasn't afraid to be who he wanted.

"That's her." The man said pointing to a bright star. "That my wife. You're not the only one who talks to the sky. I can promise you, they hear every word."

"Thank you." Steve said grabbing the flowers. "Thanks for everything."

Steve bought a few candles before walking to where he knew you were buried. He looked at the moon that seemed to be bigger and fuller than ever.

"Happy Anniversary, doll." Steve whispered.

He lit multiple candles, then placed the flowers by your grave.

"I love you. So much."

Tryin' to get to you In hopes you're on The other side Talking to me too

"I'm sure you look beautiful, like always." Steve said with a bright smile.

He thought he could almost hear her laughter. Pure and light. Steve felt a huge peace wash over him.

"Sam was being a pain again." Steve chuckled. "You always knew how to put him back in his place."

"Bucky and Nat's baby is almost here. Bucky's convinced it's a girl, but Nat thinks there's a little super soldier kicking in there." Steve laughed. "They're so cute."

Or am I a fool Who sits alone Talking to the moon

Steve knew he was all over the news. People were starting to question him. They began calling him Captain Crazy. He didn't care. You loved and heard him, it was all that mattered.

"I tried to dress nice for ya, doll." Steve said rubbing the back of his neck. "Sorry, if I look a little messy."

That same warm breeze blew over him and tossed his hair a bit. Steve laughed.

"Yeah, I like my hair a little messy, too."

Do you ever hear me calling? (Ah) oh oh oh (Ah) oh oh oh 'Cause every night I'm talking to the moon Still trying to get to you

Steve spent most of the night just chattering with you. His heart was full of love, and he wanted nothing more than to hold you in his arms one last time. The night was chilly, people bundling up, but Steve was warm. Like you had kept him warm, like you were both in each other's arms again.

"The world is so beautiful. Just like you." Steve yawned.

Steve felt the breeze push a little harder as if urging him to go home.

"Alright, doll. You know me so well. Love you. Goodnight." Steve said blowing a kiss toward the moon.

In hopes your on The other side Talking to me too Or am I a fool Who sits alone Talking to the moon

Steve sat in the waiting room. Nat was going into labor, and Bucky was going crazy.

"What if the baby doesn't come out right? What if I'm a horrible dad? What if I trip over something and drop the baby? What if—"

"What if there are no more what ifs?" Steve interrupted with a chuckle. "You're going to be a great dad, Buck."

"Thanks Steve." Bucky said taking a deep breath before entering the hospital room with Nat.

Steve stayed in the waiting room, chuckling to himself. "He's worries too much, doesn't he, doll?" Steve said looking at the moon that was shining brightly outside.

Soon, Bucky went to get Steve. Steve entered the room and saw Nat with a little bundle in her arms.

"It's a girl." Bucky said proudly. "And her name's Y/n."

Steve chocked back a sob. His baby blue eyes began welling with tears.

"Do you want to hold her?" Nat asked.

Steve walked toward the bed, and carefully held the little bundle of joy in his arms. She cooed at him and Steve held back more tears. Steve gently rocked the baby, smiling at the girl, before handing her to Bucky.

Steve looked at the shining moon outside and let his tears slide down his face. "I love you." He whispered.

I know you're somewhere out there Somewhere far away

You looked at Steve who had tears streaming down his face. You looked at Bucky and Nat who had their new baby. You cried a little, too. You knew someday Steve would reunite with you in heaven, and you cherished every word he spoke to you.

"I love you, too, Steve."

Notes:

Song is Talking to the Moon by Bruno Mars Please like or comment.

Did you cry? I teared up a bit.

#steve rodgers x reader #steve rogers x reader #sad #you might cry #steve feels #marvel #marvel fanfiction #steve rogers #Bucky Barnes #natasha romanoff