#i’m just gonna try and center my life around God and pray he helps everything fall into place

[pleasantanathema]

Miche Zacharias | Ripe

Pairing: Miche x Fem!Reader

Rating: Explicit (18+ Only)

Warnings: Breeding, Cum Eating, A Lot of Cum, Multiple Orgasms, Established Relationship

Word Count: 1.7k

A/N: This is part of my Nine Muses Event to celebrate 9k! Follow the link to read more fanfics I’m writing to celebrate. All this excessive cum is dedicated to the love of my life @titan-fodder​, thank you for always encouraging me and hyping me up 💖 

          “I can smell when you’re ovulating. It’s sweeter,” Miche buried his nose into your neck, stubble sending sparks up your skin, “thicker.”

           “There’s no way you can smell that.”

         Insistent hands pulled at your shirt, fingers sneaking underneath to rub against your sides.

           He moved you easily, like a doll on strings, pinning you against the door and caging you in with all his brawn. Your palms pushing against his chest were useless; Miche had always been like this, some unmovable force in your life. Always pressing against you, capturing you when you least expected it, just because he could. Because he knew you wanted him all the same.

           “Babe I can smell a titan a mile away, of course I can smell what’s happening in this sweet little body of yours.”

           A purr almost left your throat from how good it felt to have his large hands smoothing over your stomach, thumbs dipping below your waistband to tease closer to what he wanted. Your fingers curled into the green threads of his shirt, toes stretching as you tried to get closer. He dipped his head with a smirk, tongue sweeping into your mouth without question, dark, acidic notes of lingering wine stinging the back of your cheeks. It was bitter, addictive.

           Thrills spread across your back as you kissed him, sloppy, open mouthed and sinful. You liked being his dirty little secret, always fucking him when no one was looking. You’d done it for years, curling around each other late at night, drinking down cum and slick like hidden ambrosia.

          Long fingers wandered further into your pants, sinking into the wetness between your folds. A gasp left your mouth, but still you kept chasing his lips, drowning in him.

           “I should breed you,” he whispered.

           The words made your ears burn, made your lungs feel too hot. It was like you were already in the hazey headspace of sex and he’d barely even touched you.

           “Think about it,” his palms were white-hot heat as he stripped you, lips sucking at the tender places on your body that made you keen, “we’d make the prettiest babies.”

           You would, gods you knew that. Miche’s seed would be strong, virile, would create babies with brilliant green eyes and pretty faces. Something was churning in your belly, something deep, something blooming and ripe that was screaming to take part in the miracles of sex.

           “Everyone would catch on if I started swelling with a baby-sized bump.”

           “They would. But you’re mine anyways, doesn’t matter.”

           He finished tearing the clothes away from your body, heavy fingers trailing over your stomach as he stood, skimming up to your breasts to pinch at your nipples.

           “Get on the bed.”

           You already knew what he wanted, crawling onto sheets that smelled like him—leather and coffee, warm and inviting, like home—and pressing your face into the pillows, arching your hips up as he stood at the edge of the bed stroking his cock.

           “Fuck. Look at that pretty pussy.” A massive hand cupped your ass, his thumb making you shiver as he stroked over your folds, dipping the tip into your wetness so he could watch it stain his skin. “Let’s see how much cum you can take.”

           The burn of him sinking inside of you was always a shock, a smoldering pleasure that made you feel so weak, so full. He used to have to prep you, but over time he learned you liked the arousing pain, liked to feel every fucking inch of him as he took his time letting your cunt suck him in.

           His fingers were already on your clit before he even started moving, making you whimper and nearly buckle from the influx of pleasure that invaded your system.

           “Been smelling you all fucking day, baby. Want you to milk this cock.”

           You almost toppled over when he started to thrust, little waves of delight spreading up your spine with every drag of his cock along your walls. He knew how to play you, circling your clit so perfectly that you were already shaking. Your lower belly already hurt from clenching, all the euphoria rushing to your head and making you feel drunk.

           “God you get so fucking tight,” he grunted, starting the kind of brutal pace that told you he was already aiming for the endgame, ready to fill you up and watch you drip.

           “Fucking god, Miche, you can’t just—” but he could, your walls clamping before you could even enjoy the build up of orgasm, Miche pinching your clit just enough to wring your orgasm out of you. It almost hurt, so fast and hot and had your pussy so tight that you felt like you were going to burst around his cock.

          The tight squeeze brought him closer, had him releasing your clit so he could use his long arms to pull you up by your shoulders. You were still spent, body only moving in response to his powerful hips slapping into your ass. He loosely placed his hands around your neck, pulling you back harder with the fresh leverage.

          Your whole world felt centered around the drumming of his cock on your insides. It all still burned, like a warm, wet glow between your legs, filled to the brim with him. You were gasping and moaning, little sounds you just couldn’t help, too overwhelmed, too lost.

          Those massive hands of his got tighter around your throat. Miche’s grunts were kissing your ears, like a rhythmic hymn that he loved to pray.

          “Yeah, fuck, gonna breed you, baby, fuck my seed into you.”

          Lewd words and sounds made you flush, heat racing up your neck to your ears.

          He almost choked you when he came, hips stilling for a moment so you could both feel the way his cock pulsed. It was already too much cum to keep in, dribbles spilling out over your pussy and around his cock to paint the inside of your thighs.

          But he didn’t stop.

          Miche pulled your back to his chest, stretching your aching muscles as you stayed on your knees. His cock was still hard and twitching inside of you, fat and heavy as he started to push back into you. Your head dipped back against his shoulder, one of his hands holding your neck while the other splayed across your stomach before moving lower. Two fingers slid along the folds of your cunt, spreading around his intrusive cock so he could feel the mess he left behind.

          “I’ve got you, baby,” he groaned, lifting those fingers to your mouth. You took them in, mewling at the taste of cum and slick pooling against your tongue. He kept your mouth stuffed with the digits, allowing you to scream around them as he picked up his pace.

          He was a man determined. He promised you cum, threatened to breed you, and he was going to.

          You could feel the power within his thighs as he slammed into you, feeling his cock buried so deep you knew you would feel its ghost lingering within you for hours, days. Your used, sensitive clit was signing from his balls against it, your legs nearly crumpling from the force of his enormous body against yours.

          This time your pleasure was building, each plunge of cock sending you higher and higher into the clouds of ecstasy. It was too good, too much, and his cum just kept trickling down your legs as the time passed. It was mesmerizing to focus on the feel of the wetness spurting from your conjoined bodies with every rock of hips.

          Miche licked up your neck, beautiful nose sniffing in the scents of your sex, your skin.

          “You’re so fucking ripe.”

          He withdrew his fingers from your mouth, brushing the wet knuckles over one of your bouncing tits, twisting at your nipple.

          “W-want more,” you choked out, neck arched entirely back onto his broad shoulder.

          “More what? Tell me.”

          You took a moment just to gasp with everything thrust of his cock, trying to keep your wits.

          “Cum, mphf, want more of your cum.”

          He cursed into your neck, moving his hands to push your hips down, to bounce you on his cock like you were a tight little cocksleeve. He mumbled something about needing to feel you again, long fingers stretching back to your clit that was spread over him. It was electric, had you spiraling, pussy spasming against him, slick gushing with every crest of pleasure that came over your body. Your ears burned, your throat was dry, your head tingling with desire so forceful you felt like you had exploded. Your climax had you splitting apart, and also sucking him in so deep that it had him pouring his load into you.

          You were both so out of breath, you falling back onto your hands and knees on the mattress as Miche finally pulled his still throbbing cock from your cunt. You were ruined, the tightening of your belly making cum continuously bubble out your hole, drooling onto the sheets.

          “You look so pretty covered in cum.”

          Miche’s fingers were back between your legs, making you yelp as fingertips glided over your clit. Then he smoothed his fingers down your thighs, gathering what cum was still traveling down your legs. He pushed that lost cum back inside of you, making your fists tighten into the sheets. Over and over again he repeated the motion, taking his time to gather every viscous droplet and push it back into your quivering cunt.

          “Can’t let any go to waste,” he chuckled, eyes gleaming as he marveled over how much cum you could take. What still leaked out he gathered again, coaching you onto your back so he could dip his cum covered digits past your lips. You licked against his knuckles, sucking them in with a greedy smile.

          “Tastes good,” you cooed, observing how he was still enamored with staring at your glossy pussy.

           “Get used to it, I’m keeping you stuffed with cum until I put a baby in you.”

#miche smut #miche x reader #miche zacharius #miche zacharias #snk miche #aot miche #Mike Zacharias #mike zacharius #aot #snk #attack on titan #attack on titan fanfiction #aot fanfic #snk fanfic #miche fanfic

[rowanaelinn]

Thank you

rowaelin month day 24 - missing scene from canon

warning: nsfw content

“Sit,” Rowan ordered, nodding toward the small table standing in the middle of their cabin. Aelin, surprisingly, did as she was told. She sat and parted her legs enough so her lover could stand between them. He had brought with him a pitcher of cold water, putting it beside her with an old rag in bad condition, the fabric had been white a while ago but it was more yellow than anything else now.

“Are you going to yell?” Aelin asked and he only shrugged, taking her bleeding hand in his hand and bringing it to his lips so he could depose a delicate kiss on her bruised knuckles. She smiled at the small show of affection. Rowan had never been good with words, but he had been good at showing her how he felt.

“Why would I be angry?”

It was Aelin’s turn to shrug. “Aedion looked pissed that I punched the witch.”

“I would have done worse for what her coven did to you last spring.” Rowan’s tight voice resonated in the room. His magic started healing her hand, even if she didn’t need it. He just needed to take care of her. Aelin felt her own magic woke up at that, coming out to play with Rowan’s. She would never get tired of this feeling, this connection between their souls.

“You’re the one who got shot.” She retorted, still able to see his bloodied body on the grass, an arrow coming out of him. Aelin never wanted to experience such pain again in her life. She’d take every blow if it meant Rowan not getting hurt.

“But they targeted you.” Rowan looked back at her and Aelin could see the frozen rage on his face. They had been too close to losing each other that day, even if they didn’t even have each other yet at that time.

“Maybe I wanted to get shot,” she smirked. “But of course, you had to be dramatic and steal all the spotlight from me.”

Rowan barked a laugh. “Sometimes, someone else other than you needs to be the center of attention. We wouldn’t want your head to grow too big.”

Aelin rolled her eyes but couldn’t hold back the small smile on her lips. Rowan took more time than necessary to heal her, she knew it, but she didn’t call him out on that. Instead, she chose to enjoy the way his thumb stroked the palm of her hand, the way this simple touch heated her entire body.

She liked peaceful times like these between them, moments when they were together and didn’t either sleep or discuss war plans were rare, so Aelin learned how to enjoy them.

When Rowan was done playing with his magic, he took the rag and wet it before starting to clean her hand. Once again, he took his time, and Aelin was delighted by it. She kept thinking about how good life would be once they won the war and would be back in Terrasen.

“Done,” Rowan murmured before placing another kiss on the back of her hand. She smiled, indeed, her hand was clean and healed as if nothing happened. Rowan came closer to her, wanting to kiss her but Aelin had something else in mind.

Gently, she put her hands on his shoulder and pushed him so she had the space to slide off the table. Rowan looked at her, confusion clear in his eyes, as she walked to the door to lock it. Gods knew she didn’t want anyone other than Rowan to see what she was about to do.

Rowan’s frown deepened when she took her time to walk back to him, intensifying the sway of her hips and drawing attention from her lover just there. When she stood in front of him, she allowed him to kiss her. Just a peck, before she dropped to her knees, never breaking eye contact.

He threw his head back when he understood what she wanted to do, his breathing becoming ragged. Aelin was perfectly content for a moment to just want him as she went for his belt, unbuckling it in record time.

“Fuck, Aelin,” Rowan groaned as she put his pants down, followed by his underwear. He was already hard as if the sheer sight of her on her knees was enough to arouse him. “You don’t have to,” He told her and just for that, she wanted to do it ten times more.

Aelin didn’t answer. No, instead she took him in hand and licked his tip. He let out more curses than Aelin ever heard him speak.

Aelin had never done this, never felt confident enough to do it to Chaol last year, and ever since she had Rowan shared their body on that beach, Rowan had never let her do anything, always taking the lead and being the one on his knees. So, for the last few days, Aelin had planned how to surprise him so she could finally give him this pleasure. Of course, she hadn’t planned on beating the witch just so she could suck her lover off, but it sure as hell was an amazing opportunity. Especially when she had felt the slight change in his scent when she had delivered the blow. She loved his wicked mind.

Slowly, she licked him from base to tip, taking the head on her mouth and using her tongue to play with it. If the noises coming out of Rowan were any indication, she’d say she wasn’t too bad at it.

She used her hand to pump the base of his erection as she took more and more in her mouth. Aelin felt the ghost of a thrust in her mouth and when she looked up, Rowan’s pained eyes were on her.

The overbearing buzzard probably just wanted to keep it slow for her, once again putting her before his own pleasure, but Aelin was having none of that today. This was for him, she wanted him to enjoy himself and think about himself for once.

She slid her hand from his shaft to his balls, cupping them. At this, Rowan’s hand gripped her shoulder. She kept looking at him as she took almost all of him, this tip hitting the back of his throat almost making her choke. “Fuck, you’re so good,” Rowan said and it had her clenching her thighs. Seeing him receiving pleasure, hearing him speak to her, shouldn’t turn her on that much.

Tears were rolling down her face when she pulled her head back, taking him in hand while she tried to get her breathing back to normal. Rowan’s hand clenched on her shoulder when she fisted him harder and while it did nothing to her, she still moaned with him.

“Fuck my mouth,” she looked up at him and he cursed. She was probably a sight to behold right now saliva on her chin and rosy swollen lips, tears coming out of her eyes. Rowan shook his head, but Aelin had none of it. “Come on, Rowan. I’m not some pretty flower that will break.” She told him as she tightened her hold on him, his free hand shot to her other shoulder, trying to keep himself on his feet.

“One condition,” he told her and Aelin urged him to speak by stroking him faster. “Touch yourself.”

It was her turn to shake her head. No, it was all about Rowan. All about pleasing him. All about thanking him for everything he did for her.

“Aelin, I can smell how much you want it, your scent is driving me-” he groaned as Aelin twisted her hand, her other one finding his balls. “-crazy. Do it,” he said and when he saw he hadn’t convinced her, he used his last card. “For me. Do it for me,” he grilled through his teeth, and suddenly, Aelin was undoing her own belt before shoving her hand down her pants.

She didn’t even know males were turned on by this, but Rowan definitely was. Oh, gods, she’d have so much fun with that later. She couldn’t help but smirk at every scenario in which she could tease him that comes to her mind.

As her hand slipped under her panties, finding her soaked heat, Rowan took off her hand from his balls and started stroking himself, eyes fixed on her hand moving under the garments. She moaned, letting her head fall back on his thigh, as her fingers found her clit and started circling it.

Not wasting time, Aelin put her mouth back on Rowan, taking in his tip and some of his length, before stopping her movements on him, looking up at Rowan, waiting for him to do anything.

She moaned around him when she slid a finger in her, and it urged him to thrust. Faster than she could comprehend, Rowan’s hands were in her hair, holding her head still, as he thrust his hips erratically in her.

Aelin had nothing do to but keeping her mouth open as she kept fucking herself with her fingers. She hadn’t touched herself since Rowan first touched her on that beach and she could not help but realize how small her fingers were compared to his.

She gagged every time he hit the back of her throat but she didn’t ask him to stop. On the contrary, she kept moaning around him, her silent way to beg him to keep going. “Such a good mouth,” Rowan groaned and Aelin clenched around her fingers at that. She loved it when he was talkative in bed.

She was already so close, too worked up from seeing Rowan take pleasure and having his way with her. He pulled hard at her head, making her release a loud moan, Rowan followed, taking pleasure in the vibrations around his cock. “Fuck, Fireheart, I’m gonna-” He groaned loudly as she took the initiative to make him as deep as she could.

He had warned her to let her retract if she wanted, but Aelin Ashryver Galathynius had never been one to back down from a challenge. She wanted all of Rowan, wanted his taste deep in her throat.

They worked together, each second bringing them closer to the edge, and when Aelin reached that peak, Rowan followed, spilling himself in her throat.

Her orgasm made it harder to swallow, too focused on what she was feeling. So she wasn’t surprised to see Rowan kneeling in front of her, using the rag from earlier to clean her lips and chin. When he was done, Aelin smiled at him and he returned it.

“You’re amazing, Fireheart,” Rowan said as he leaned in to kiss her. The kiss started sweet and loving, but it soon turned needy. It was crazy to Aelin how they could need each other so soon after getting off, but she prayed to all the gods it would never stop.

When his hands went to take off her shirt, someone knocked on their door. Loudly.

Rowan cursed, letting his head drop on her shoulder as she chuckled, using her small hands to stroke his back.

Apparently, they’d have to wait before he could find out how wet, exactly, it made her to touch him.

-----

taglist: @sheharahu // @morganofthewildfire // @thestoriesyoutell // @fromthelibraryofemilyj // @swankii-art-teacher // @itsforeverinnocent-blog // @becarefuloflove // @imnotsogoodatthis // @rowaelinismyotp // @a-court-of-milkandhoney // @feysand-loml // @themoonthestarsthesuriel // @live-the-fangirl-life // @story-scribbler // @loves-books // @fangirlprincess09 // @theysayitscrazy // @hellasblessed // @danibutterr // @endlessdaydream // @thegreyj

#rowaelin #rowan whitethorn #rowan x aelin #rowaelin fanfiction #throne of glass fanfiction #rowaelin month #rowaelin smut #rowaelinmonth #aelin galathynius

[just-dreaming-marvel]

Out Of Time ~ 4

MAIN MASTERLIST

Out Of Time MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 2,325ish

Summary: Steve comes back bigger and with permission to take Y/N with him.

Warnings: none

Steve was gone before Y/N woke up in the morning. She understood that he probably thought that was best for both of them, but she couldn’t help but be a little angry at him. She went to work that day, and the weeks following, with a plastered smile on her face. She struggled to do what she had promised Steve she would do. All she wanted to do was curl up in her bed and cry until she couldn’t feel anything anymore. It was her day off, and she was planning on doing just that, when a knock sounded at her door.

“Coming!” She shouted as she slowly got off her bed. The knock impatiently sounded again. “I said I’m coming!” The knock sounded for a third time just as Y/N had reached the door. She pulled it open. “I said I was coming! Couldn’t you just—“ 

She stopped speaking at the sight before her. A large, blonde man in military uniform stood at her doorstep. Y/N studied him. He was all too familiar, yet not at the same time. When she meet his eyes, that’s when she realized who was standing at her doorstep.

“Stevie?” She gasped.

“Hey, Y/N,” he smiled. 

“What— How— You— You’re taller. An-and you—“

“I got chosen, Y/N/N. They actually chose me. And it worked.”

Y/N was speechless. She turned around and began pacing around the living room, leaving the door wide open for Steve to come in. He came in and carefully shut the door. Y/N silently paced as tears formed. She wanted him to come back, she had literally prayed that they wouldn’t choose him. And look what had happened? God laughed at her and made sure he became the chosen one.

“Are you going to say anything, Y/N/N?” Steve timidly asked after a few minutes of pain staking silence.

“What do you want me to say, Steve?!” Y/N stopped pacing, turned to her brother, and yelled. “Congratulations? Well, congratulations! You successfully became a science experiment and got to join the army! You get to go to Europe and be shot at! Hurray!”

“Y/N—“

“Don’t, Steve. Don’t try to make excuses.”

“I wasn’t going to make excuses. I was going to tell you that I’m actually not going to be heading into battle anytime soon.”

“What?” 

“They— um… they think that I should go around the country selling bonds.”

“Selling bonds? Why?”

“You didn’t see the paper?”

Y/N shook her head. “Haven’t wanted to… I’ve been afraid of what it might say.”

“I went after a Nazi. Saved a child. The story went Nation wide. They think that because of it, I’ll be able to sell bonds.”

“So… you’re not going to be shot at?”

“I still want to go and fight, and if this is how I get there, I’m okay with it.”

“How long will you be gone?”

“I don’t know. But I got permission to take you with me. If you’re willing.”

Y/N sighed, running her hand over her face as she looked at the ground. “What I am suppose to do?”

“We’ll find you something.” Steve took a step forward. “You won’t be useless. I just…” He set his now large hands on her arms, running them up and down in comfort. “I just need you there with me. I need my sister’s support and I need to be able to take care of you.”

“Is this because you’re bigger than me now? Now that five minute difference is going to matter?” Y/N chuckled. “Yes. I’ll go with you.” 

Steve pulled her into his arms. It was definitely going to take some time for Y/N to get used to how large Steve had become. She wrapped her arms around his large frame. 

“I guess I finally have a big brother,” she teased.

“Hey! It’s not funny,” he laughed.

A week later, Steve and Y/N were in a large theater. It was filled with people. Steve was dressed in a red, white, and blue costume. Y/N was watching him as he stood at the center of the stage, just behind the curtain, trying to prepare himself to go out and face the crowd. She could tell he was nervous. Senator Brandt’s aide was there to make sure that Steve didn’t bail.

“I don’t know if I can do this,” Steve second guessed, letting out a deep breath.

“Nothing to it,” Brandt’s aide said. “Sell off a few bonds, bonds buy bullets, bullets kill Nazi’s. Bing bang boom. You’re an American hero.”

“It’ just not how I pictured getting there.”

“The senator’s got a lot of pull up on the hill. You play ball with us, you’ll be leading your own platoon in no time. Take the shield.” Steve put on his mask and grabbed his shield.

“You got this, Steve,” Y/N walked up, smiling encouragingly at him. “Go get ‘em.”

Steve gave a nervous smile before taking another deep breath. Senator Brandt’s aide was clearly done with how long it was taking him, and pushed Steve onto the stage. The singers began singing and dancing as soon as he was out there. 

Y/N moved to the side of the stage to see better. Steve was nervous, clearly, and hadn’t memorized his lines. But he stayed up there, through it all. Afterwards, he signed autographs, with you right behind him. Life went on this way for weeks. Traveling to different cities around the country. Steve was embracing the name of Captain America and finally memorized his lines. The ladies were obsessed with him. Men wanted to be him. Children idolized him. You watched from a far, opting to just be Steve’s moral support, which was definitely needed. 

By the time November rolled around, Steve, Y/N, and the rest of the Captain America crew started touring Europe. They were touring the Allied military camps there. Y/N was confused how a man playing dress up would help cheer up the soldiers, but Senator Brandt insisted that Steve was needed there. And if Steve was told that he was needed, he was going to be there. Y/N was currently standing backstage, watching Steve get made fun of by the soldiers.

 She cringed as they yelled at him to bring the girls back out. Brandt’s Aide quickly ordered the girls back out and Steve came backstage.

“Don’t worry, pal,” Brandt’s Aide put a hand on Steve’s back. “They’ll warm up to you. Don’t worry.”

Y/N rolled her eyes as Brandt’s Aide walked away and she made her way towards her brother. “I knew we shouldn’t have come,” she stated. “Why would soldiers need a man dressed in tights to come and speak to them?” Steve glared at her. “Sorry, it’s just the truth.”

“I know…” Steve sighed as he took off his helmet. “I just believed that coming here would do some good…”

“No. You believed that by coming here, you would see some action. And don’t try to lie to me, Steve. We’re twins. I know you better than anyone else, sometimes even yourself. You just agreed to this tour to try to have an opportunity to fight.”

“Can we drop this right now?” Steve questioned as he pulled on his trench coat and grabbed his sketch book. “All I want is some quiet.” 

He turned around and headed to the back stairs. Y/N sighed as she watched him sit down and begin sketching. Rain started pouring, almost in perfect timing. Y/N eventually moved a chair to sit behind Steve and began reading a book. 

“Hello, Steve,” a British female voice broke the twins out of their thoughts. The woman came up from behind them, taking off her rain coat.

“Hi,” Steve looked up at the woman and greeted.

“You must be Y/N, Steve’s sister,” the woman smiled. “I’m Peggy.”

“Hi,” Y/N greeted. Steve had mentioned Peggy a few times in the past few months, aways blushing and stuttering. She could now understand why.

“What are you doin’ here?” Steve asked the woman.

“Officially, I’m not here at all.” Peggy just above Steve. “That was quite a performance.”

“Yeah. Uh… I had to improvise a little bit. Crowds I’m used to are usually more uh… twelve.”

“I understand you’re ‘America’s New Hope’?”

“Bond sales take a ten percent bump in every state I visit.”

“Is that Senator Brandt I hear?”

“At least he’s got me doin’ this. Phillips would have had me stuck in a lab.”

“And these are your only two options? A lab rat or a dancing monkey? You were meant for more than this, you know?”

“Oh, he knows,” Y/N muttered. “He just wishes he was out there fighting instead of dancing.” Steve hesitates. Obviously waiting to say something, either to Peggy or something about his sister’s comments, but stops.

“What? Peggy pressed.

“You know for the longest time I dreamed about coming overseas and being on the front lines,” Steve said almost wishfully. “Serving my country. I finally get everything I wanted, and I’m wearing tights.”

They’re interrupted by an ambulance honking. The trio turned around to watch the wounded soldiers be taken out of the ambulance. Tears form in Y/N’s eyes as the possibility of Bucky ending up that way. At the possibility of him returning to her in a coffin.

“They look like they’ve been through hell,” Steve stated as they still watched.

“These men more than most,” Peggy said. 

“What happened?” Y/N asked, unable to look away from the wounded men.

“Schmidt sent out a force to Azzano. Two hundred men went up against him and less than fifty returned. Your audience contained what was left of the one-o-seventh. The rest were killed or captured.”

“The one-o-seventh?” Y/N and Steve questioned at the same time, suddenly standing up. They looked at each other. The one-o-seventh was Bucky’s division.

“What?” Peggy wondered, standing up as well.

“Come on!” Steve insisted, grabbing Y/N’s hand as they ran through the rain to the command tent. Peggy followed behind, holding her coat over her head. “Colonel Phillips,” Steve addressed as they entered the tent.

“Well, if it isn’t the Star-Spangled Man with a plan,” the Colonel sarcastically said as he sat at a desk. “And what is your plan today?”

“I need the casualty list from Azzano.”

“You don’t get to give me orders, son.”

“I just need one name. Sergeant James Barnes from the hundred and seventh.”

Colonel Phillips ignored Steve and pointed to Peggy. “You and I are gonna have a conversation later that you won’t enjoy.”

“Please tell us if he’s alive, sir,” Y/N begged. “B, A, R—“ 

“I can spell,” the Colonel cut her off. He looked at the trio before looking back down at the stack of papers in his hands. He stood up, carrying the papers with him. “I have signed more of these condolence letters today than I would care to count. But the name does sound familiar. I’m sorry.” 

Y/N gasped, hand coming up to cover her mouth as she held in a sob. Steve stood there, tall, not letting that be the end of the conversation. He also didn’t want to show his hurt or weakness, though he held onto Y/N’s hand tighter.

“What about the others?” Steve questioned. “Are you planning a rescue mission?”

“Yeah! It’s called winning the war,” Colonel Phillips stated.

“But if you know where they are, why not at least—“

“They’re thirty miles behind the lines. Through the most fortified territory in Europe. We’d lose more men than we’d save. But I don’t expect you to understand that, because you’re a chorus girl.”

Steve’s jaw clenched. “I think I understand just fine.”

“Well then understand it somewhere else. If I read the posters correctly, you got some place to be in thirty minutes.” Colonel Phillips walked away as Steve looked at the military map, clearly showing where the men were lost.

“Yes, sir. I do.” Steve quickly led himself and Y/N out of the tent and into the show tent.

“Steve,” Y/N whimpered once they were alone inside.

He quickly let go of her hand and pulled her into his chest. That’s when she let loose, let all the tears out. Y/N had never told Steve what had happened between her and his best friend, but it didn’t surprise Steve to see her acting like this. Bucky was her friend too. 

“I have to do something, Y/N,” Steve whispered.

“Please, no.” She gripped onto his shirt. “I can’t lose you too.”

“I’m sorry.” He pulled away and began changing and packing somethings. “I have to try and save the guys that are left.”

“What do you plan to do?” Peggy asked as she entered the tent, shaking off her coat. “Walk to Austria?”

“If that’s what it takes.”

“You heard the Colonel, your friend is most likely dead.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yes, we don’t,” Y/N cried. “But if you go in there, you’ll most likely die too. And then where does that leave me?”

“Colonel Phillips is devising a strategy,” Peggy stated. “If he detects—“

“By the time he’s done that, it could be too late!” Steve walked out to a jeep, the women following behind. “You told me you thought I was meant for more than this. Did you mean that?”

“Every word.”

“Then you gotta let me go.” Steve jumped into the jeep.

“Steve! Please!” Y/N pleaded, grabbing onto his arm. “Please don’t leave me.”

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” He leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead. “I have to do what’s right.”

“You can’t drive there, Steve,” Peggy stated. “I have a better way.”

next chapter >

Notes: Tags are struggling right now, for many writers. So I truly appreciate all the likes, comments, and reblogs. It means the world.

#tony stark x reader #the avengers x reader #avengers x reader #iron man x reader #captain america x reader #winter soldier x reader #tony stark imagine #Steve Rogers imagine #Bucky Barnes imagine #avengers imagine #marvel imagine #marvel fanfiction #nick fury x reader #steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes x reader #Phil Coulson x reader #howard stark x reader

[chilling-seavey]

Qui Totum Vult Totum Perdit (d.s.) - 15

A/N ...and a conclusion.

Warnings: This story is centered around a murder so there will be graphic descriptions of blood, death/manslaughter, dealing with corpses, possible domestic abuse (physical/verbal), crime/covering up a crime, shock/grief, and other possibly heavy or triggering topics. Please read at your own discretion.

I didn’t move for a moment, frozen in stiff shock. That couldn’t be true. Jonah had been helping me this whole time…coming over when I called and helping me leave the state…

I slowly tucked the papers into a neat stack with realization and turned casually out the passenger side window, trying to wrap my head around what I just pieced together. I hoped it wasn’t true. I prayed to whatever God above that it wasn’t true. I felt like I was going to be sick. My wife was dead in the trunk of my car and the hand who did it to her was driving me two states over on the run. There was nothing around us for miles so it’s not like I could run for help if I wanted to and even still…would I want to call the cops on my best friend? He didn’t when we thought it was me. But yet, everything he ever said to be the prior twenty-fours hours had been complete lies to set me up into believing this trap.

He had been all too calm.

Jonah sang softly from beside me, the music playing quietly through the car as we drove down the desert highway. He had his sunglasses on and his hat, shading his face from the sun and from me. I couldn’t look at him without wanting to be sick with dread.

“Jonah.” I finally spoke shakily.

“Yeah?” he answered innocently.

I kept my eyes out the side window, curling the corner of the letter under my finger nervously as I fought with myself to confront him. My leg was shaking and I pressed my hand down on my thigh to try and calm the habit. He turned down the music and I could feel him glancing over at me a few times before focusing back on the road. I took a small inhale before whispering to the window, “You did it, didn’t you? You killed her.”

There was a silence. A suffocating tense silence that pressed down on my chest until I swear I was going to choke. The music turned off and the only sounds for miles was the desert winds whooshing past the car. I closed my eyes tightly and resting my fist against my mouth in anticipation for his reply. His hesitation only made it worse.

“Tell me the truth, Jonah.” I ordered as strongly as I could but even I could hear my voice shaking. “What was this letter about?”

Jonah’s hands gripped tighter to the wheel and I heard him let out a strong sigh, “She just blocked my number.”

“Why did she block you?”

A pause.

“Jonah.”

“Because I was in love with her, bro.”

That certainly got my attention. I whipped my head around to look at him, eyes furrowed in his direction, “The fuck do you mean you were in love with her?”

“I loved her. And you were a shitty fucking husband, dude.” Jonah tisked. He adjusted the blue cap on his head, “I could have treated her so much better than you and I told her that but she didn’t like that.”

My eyebrows furrowed as I processed the information my best friend was telling me. I turned back out the window and watched the desert speed past us along the empty highway.

“But did you kill her?” I repeated my initial question.

There was a pause.

His silence was my answer.

“You did.” I breathed.

“Don’t freak out, okay?”

“Don’t freak out? Jonah, what the- what the fuck-”

Jonah huffed as if I was being a complete vexation. God, dear reader, I didn’t know what to think. I tried to form some sort of response, some sort of sentence to figure out why to did it but my lungs had abandoned me and I could only muster a few random panicked words.

“Why- I just- You- She- I- Why- Why did you- Oh my God- Jonah-”

The car slowed down as Jonah pulled onto the dusty dirt shoulder of the freeway. I glanced back at him as he put my car in park and got out, his jaw clenched stiffly and his face stone. I watched him step to the back door and he tugged his bag towards him before shuffling through it and right to the bottom. My chest was heaving with emotion and I swear I could hear my heartbeat pounding in my ears. Neither of us spoke.

And I especially didn’t when I saw the pistol he pulled from his bag.

He slammed the backdoor and walked around the car to my side, angling the gun right towards me through the window, “Get the fuck out.”

I froze.

“Get the fuck out of the car, Daniel.” Jonah repeated darkly.

My trembling hand found the handle and I stumbled out of the car and into the hot desert heat, the papers dropping to the floor of the car and the two cell phones and the denim jacket tumbling out onto the hot sand. The buzz of insects could be heard faintly in the distance between the dry patches of grass that dotted the landscape behind Jonah and beyond the paved highway. I raised my hands up slowly, not taking my eyes off my best friend and the gun in his hand.

“Jonah…” I spoke slowly, cautiously.

This had to be a fucking dream.

“I didn’t want it to come to this.” Jonah said darkly, his voice shaking with emotion.

“We can work something out.” I assured him quietly, now just trying to save my own life.

“Shut up.”

I swallowed thickly, eyes dropping to my cell phone that had fallen beside the feet in my haste to get out of the car.

“Don’t.” Jonah lunged forward and I gasped as he grabbed my arm and yanked me around so he was standing between the car and myself, giving me a shove away. His aggression made me stumble over my feet and the slight decline off the side of the highway shoulder and I fell backwards on the desert ground.

Have you ever joked around with your best friend about loving them so much you’d take a bullet for them? Cruelest twist of fate of my fucking life.

I stared up at Jonah from where I was splayed out on the ground, staring into the end of the pistol and the reflection of my own face in his sunglasses.

“I loved her.” Jonah said sharply. “I loved her more than you did.”

“Jonah…”

He cut me off, “I-I told her not to marry you! I told her you’re too in love with music to give a shit about her but she didn’t listen. I had to prove it to her so I sent you all that work to look over on your honeymoon. I’m not a fucking idiot, Daniel, I could have done it myself; but she had to see that you would put her second to your work if it came to it. Dumb woman didn’t even care. Not even when I met you at home after your flight and spoke to her in the studio that night and gave her all the proof that I loved her more than you.”

Jonah tisked distastefully and shook his head.

“You fought so loudly in there I could have sworn it was over…that you two were over…but she told me that she…that she loved you more than anyone in the whole goddamn world no matter what and I could never come close.”

I felt my chest tighten at that, tears choking me up in the back of my throat as he spoke of her last words and her last moments.

“We could have been happy together, she and I. I could have given her a nice fucking life. I fucking hated seeing her with you…especially seeing how fucking miserable you treated her. So I told her…if she didn’t want me, she couldn’t have anyone.” Jonah said through his teeth. “And she tried to run. And she set off the security alarm but I am the only other person outside of your family who knows the code to turn the alarm off and delete the tapes. It’s her birthday. Of course, I was going to remember her fucking birthday.”

I tensed at his confession, feeling the rough sand and heat of the desert burning through my skin and my clothes as I laid under his control.

“I knew where the knives were. I had this plan for weeks…ever since she first blocked my number before the wedding. She had one last chance to change her mind…to be happy with me and she blew it. And she begged for her life. And she cried for you. And I watched her sweet face fall into the hands of death like an angel.”

I couldn’t hold back the sob that fell from my lips.

“Then you came out. You heard her scream so you came to check on her but I couldn’t let you see me so in the shadows I knocked you out on the side of the piano and left you there, setting up the perfect scene to make it look like you did it with no traces of my own. No security camera tapes, no unfamiliar fingerprints, nothing. And I could have gotten away with it if you…if you weren’t so…so fucking persistent.”

The pistol was trembling in his fist, still directed right at my face.

“Jonah.” I breathed shakily.

“My name is still clear though. You’re the only one who they’re looking for right now, especially after you just told Corbyn she was dead…Jack knows too. The cops are probably tracing your phone right now. They’re probably on their way to lock you the fuck up right now.” Jonah licked his lips and took a breath, “But you’re gonna talk.”

“N-No I won’t.” I rushed out. “I swear I won’t. W-We can set up someone else…we can figure it out, Jonah, I promise.”

Jonah cocked the gun and I scrambled a bit farther back over the coarse sand, scraping my skin over the gravel in my futile attempt to get away.

“Jonah, please, bro, I swear I’ll help you. I-I forgive you-”

“I don’t need your forgiveness.” Jonah walked down the slight embankment to where I was dropped back over the ground and he stood right over me until the sun was blocked by his body and cast a shadow over me.

He was my best friend in the world, my business partner, and we had gone through most of our lives together but looking at him in that moment, I didn’t even recognise him.

“Jonah.” I spoke slowly, cautiously, licking my dry lips under the scorching heat of the desert sun. “Please, bro. Please…we can work something out, I swear.”

“Shut the fuck up, Seavey.” Jonah snapped loudly, his voice nearly echoing across the vast expanse of bare land around us. He dropped his volume as if he was convincing himself, “Fuck it. At least this way I’ll get your shares of the label and a clean slate.”

He was breathing hard as he moved closer and stepped on my hands to keep me from moving, the toe of his designer shoes pressing light indents into the back of my hands as he pushed them against the rough ground. I leaned away from him and the stare of the pistol habitually, praying for any sort of miracle. The freeway was perfectly empty and there wasn’t a car in sight but my own. There was no way out of this.

I let my gaze linger on the closed trunk, swallowing back the tears that threatened to fall at the image of her tucked up like a science experiment in the equipment case. The dust was burning my eyes but I didn’t doubt that the drop that finally trickled down my cheek was an honest heartbroken tear.

If she cried for me, I was going to cry for her too.

“What a Romeo and Juliet love story.” Jonah spoke, his voice dripping in taunting darkness, as he bent down slowly over top of me.

The cold metal of the mouth of the pistol touching my forehead instinctively made my eyes close tightly. The pumping of my heart echoed in my ears and the scorching desert sun dripped sweat down my brow to mix in with the salty perspiration of fear.

“Daniel Seavey killed his wife…” Jonah pressed it harder there, enough to make a whimper fall from my throat, “and then killed himself.”

What do you think of in your last moments? People often say you see your life flashing before your eyes or you see a bright light but, for me, all I saw was Avalon.

Nearly twenty-four hours since I found her. Nearly forty since she died on my studio floor alone and in fear. My world died that night and the only positive that I could possibly reach for was that at least I wouldn’t live in a universe without her for too long.

And yet, thrown there on the side of the freeway with my best friend holding a loaded gun to my head, all I could think about was her. I could hear her laugh and feel the warm of her skin and I couldn’t wait to see her again; to be able to stroke her soft hair and smell her sweet perfume and to be able to tell her how much I really did lov

-(The End)-

Detective Team: @jonahlovescoffee​ @randomlimelightxxx​ @stuffofseaveyy​ @hopinglimelight​ @tempus-ut-luceant​ @br4nd1s​ @xkelsev​ @hiya-its-amber​ @the-girl-who-cried-wolf​

#🔪 #im scared to post this #im second guessing everything #maybe this is stupid #daniel seavey #jonah marais #jack avery #zach herron #corbyn besson #why dont we #why dont we fanfic #daniel seavey fanfic

[demonwifey]

Mommy’s Kissing Who?🎄🎅🏻

Hey guys! Hope you all had a safe and amazing holiday! So this idea literally came to me right after listening to “I Saw Mommy Kissing Beetlejuice” and knew I had to post it for you guys to see. While you’re reading this just keep in mind I didn’t make the reader’s daughter Skye even though she was the one signing it. I’m bad at names so you’ll see the daughter go by she and her for the entire thing. Think about if you had a daughter and what you would name her. Hope you guys enjoy!💚💜🖤  

Beetlejuice x black+fem!reader

Warnings: cursing, hints of sexual themes

Word count: 3,688

“I can’t believe I’m gonna ask this but, Beej, just please try to be on your best behavior.” You practically begged, clasping your hands together near your chest for added effect. 

The demon man let out a hearty laugh before snapping his suspenders against his chest. His costume was like a mix between his normal suit and an actual Santa costume: red and white striped, his regular boots, and a Santa hat to top it off. You thought his overgrown green beard would’ve been a giveaway to your child at least. 

“Come on, babes. Give me a little credit! I’m gonna be the best damn Santa these twerps have ever seen.” He reassured you. His confidence should’ve made you feel at ease but it didn’t. No that it mattered, it was too late to turn back now. You both looked up as the Scout Leader announced his arrival from outside the small room you two were in, basically queuing him to come out. 

“It’s Showtime, babes.” He said to you and gave a flirtatious wink before walking out to the young girls yelling in excitement. 

You watched as they all scurried to huddle around him. You watched your daughter closely, thankfully she didn’t recognize Beej and the other girls didn’t notice anything off. Maybe he was right, you should’ve given him more credit. You straightened your dress and fixed your hair out before making your way over the other parents as they all watched with joy. 

“HO HO HO! Merry Christmas, you little shits!” You heard him yell loudly across the room. 

You stopped in your tracks and your eyes widened almost comically at the sentence you just heard. You prayed to any other worldly being out there that it was only your imagination. When you looked up at the other parents, you could see it wasn’t. Their faces matched yours and they quickly turned their eyes towards you. Yeah, this was going to be one long night. 

****

You didn’t know how you could’ve ended up in a worse position. You were in charge of one thing for the Girl Scout’s Christmas party: get someone to play Santa Claus and have him hand out the girls merit badges. All the other parent’s handled things like food, decorations, etc. It’s not like it was a hard task for you to do. Hell, you found and booked a guy at the beginning of the month. Everything was fine on your end, until two days ago. Your Santa Claus called saying he was sick with the flu. You’d already had a few mishaps with Girl Scout events in the past, so this was your chance to show the other parents that you weren’t a total screw up. Yet here you were on your laptop, scrambling through different websites to try and find a new person to play Santa. 

“Hey Mommy, which shoes should I wear for the party tomorrow?” You heard your daughter’s perky voice ask from behind you. As a reflex, you quickly slammed your laptop screen down and looked at her with wide eyes. She stood behind the couch with each hand holding one shoe from a different pair. 

“Hmm, I think I like the black ones better. They’ll match your badge belt.” You faked a casual tone. 

She looked at the shoe you chose, like she was thinking for a moment, before nodding in excited agreement and running back to her room. You strained a smile as you watched her go before letting out a frustrated sigh and once you heard her door close. You were doing this, not just for the other girls, but for her as well. Your daughter always got so excited when someone mentioned Santa. How shitty would you feel if you had to watch her face turn to disappointment when they were all told Santa wasn’t coming? The mental image alone made your heart sink to the floor. You leaned forward to drop your head into your hands and let out another sigh; this one being much louder. 

“Hey, keep making noises like that and I’m gonna get turned on, babes.” You heard a familiar voice coming from the side of you. 

You didn’t even need to move your head to know it was Beetlejuice. You loved the demon to death but right now, you were in no mood to joke around. You could tell he sensed that when you didn’t respond. You didn’t see, but he awkwardly scratched the back of his head before sitting next to you. He placed an equally awkward hand on your back and started rubbing circles on it. 

“Uh, you’re not gonna start crying are you? I’ve always been bad with that sort of thing. I mean, I had to watch The Notebook with Adam and Barbara one time and I had no idea what to do. They just started sobbing and saying “If you’re a bird, I’m a bird” to each other and it was the stupidest thing I’d seen-” And you stopped him before he could finish. 

“No, Beej, I’m not gonna start crying. But, God, do I want to.” You said while sitting up, his hand still rubbing circles on your back. “It’s like I had one job and it went straight to shit in one day. I’ve looked everywhere for someone to play Santa last minute but they’re all booked! And I don’t have any family members or friends that are free either. Ugh, as if they’d actually do it.” 

The room fell silent for a moment. There was no point in even opening up your laptop again. Not to say you gave up...but you basically gave up. 

“What about the kid’s sperm donor? Maybe the Christmas spirit has him feeling less like a piece of shit.” Beetlejuice spoke; half joking, half serious. You scoffed but then let out an actual laugh. He moved his hand to around your shoulder before and you laid his chest. Your fingers started absentmindedly playing with his tie.  

“If you’re referring to her father, he hasn’t been around since she was one. I doubt anything would make him less of a piece of shit.” You responded. You hated the guy for running out on you and your daughter but you’d never have him around Beetlejuice. You already knew Beej would have murder in his eyes as soon as he’d walk through the door. You moved your neck upward to give him a quick kiss on the cheek, showing that you appreciated his attempt to make you feel better.

“Well, at least this'll be an excuse to ruin Santa for her. Just walk in and say “SANTA ISN’T COMING BECAUSE SANTA ISN’T REAL!”. Rip the band aid off. It’ll be great.” He joked, looking down at you with a sinister grin on his face. There was no doubt in your mind that he wasn’t joking. 

You let out a defeated giggle before flipping his tie up to hit him in the face. You were about to give him another kiss before you heard your daughter’s voice again. 

“Beetlejuice!” She screamed before running around the couch to jump between you two. You both laughed at her sudden presence before Beetlejuice placed a hand on her head. 

“What’s up, anklebiter? Have too many sugar packets before bed?” He joked and her own laughter wasn’t far behind. She quickly climbed on top of his lap and pulled out two of her favorite scrunchies from her pocket. 

“No, silly! I need your opinion. Which scrunchie would look better for my hair tomorrow?” She asked, much like asked you about the shoes before. 

Beetlejuice was always so good around your daughter. Most guys you knew ran for the hills when they found out you had a kid, but somehow, this rude and crude demon didn’t. Maybe it was all the time he’d spent with Lydia but he fell into the ‘cool dad/uncle’ role very quickly. Not that you were begging to have that figure in her life, it was still nice to watch them interact so naturally. You laughed as Beetlejuice plucked the different color scrunchies out of her hand and examined them closely. 

“Nope, neither one will do.” He twisted his face at them before tossing them both to the side. Your daughter only blinked in confusion as she watched Beetlejuice reach into one of his jacket pockets. 

“This one is way more suitable!” Suddenly he pulled out a black and white striped scrunchie with a glitter covered green and black tulle bow at the center. You’d been with Beetlejuice for a while so thankfully the both of you were used to his magic. Your daughter squealed in excitement and grabbed the scrunchie out of his hand.  

“Beej, you can’t keep giving her presents before Christmas.” You laughed, still watching her as she gawked at her new accessory. The demon man ignored you, knowing he was only winning her heart more and more each day. “Alright, now what do we say?” You asked, giving her a knowing look.

“Thank you, so much BJ! Thank you, thank you, thank you!” The child didn’t hold back her enthusiasm as she jumped to give him a tight hug. Beetlejuice let out his usual scratchy laugh while giving her a few pats on the back. 

You watched their interaction before squinting, an idea popping into your head. 

“There’s no way...” You thought to yourself, but the image stuck in your head. Once you saw it, you couldn’t unsee it. From his perfect chubby body to his earthy laugh, you could tell he was the perfect fit for your idea.

“Alright, mini me, time for bed.” You shook yourself away from your thoughts and placed a hand on her head. She turned to face you with a large pout on her face. You stopped her before she could even protest. “Teeth and pajamas, now. I’ll be in to help with your hair in a minute.” You said softly but sternly. 

The girl turned to Beej for help but he only shrugged, already knowing not to protest against you. She dropped her shoulders in defeat before saying thank you one last time and giving him her own cheek kiss. She soon shuffled away to get ready for bed, still giggling about the scrunchie.

“Ya’know, doll. I like it when you get tough. It really does something to me.” The demon man wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. You rolled your eyes before making your way over to him. You swung one leg over his lap and straddled him, using your hands to hold and squish his cheeks together. Beetlejuice didn’t waste time using one hand to hold your thigh and the other to grab your ass. 

“Beej....” You started, staring into his golden eyes with a look that was nothing less than seductive. It didn’t take long for Beetlejuice to be wrapped around your finger. His hands started rubbing slowly in their respective spots as you moved down to pace soft kisses on his neck. “....how would you like to do me a BIG favor?” You asked.

****

Being the amazing boyfriend that he was, Beetlejuice said yes to your favor of him being the replacement Santa, at the cost of you being a wreck the entire event. Did you ever stop sweating? No. You were so used to Beej’s crass behavior at home that you didn’t think about how bad it would be to have him around other people. He started telling you all the ‘fun’ party tricks he had planned for the night. As soon as he mentioned giving the girls candy bags full of dead bugs, you realized the mistake you might’ve made. 

There were more lows than highs throughout the night. Beetlejuice would make crude jokes every chance he got. Most of these jokes went over the girls heads, but their parents didn't find them very amusing. Even in your panicked state, you would have to divert Beetlejuice back to his original task. God, don’t even mention when you got close to him. It’s like he’d lose track of what was even happening to openly flirt and make lewd comments about you, in front of everyone. You lost count of how many times you had to say “haha Santa I don’t think Mrs. Claus would like that” before pinching him and making him get back on track. When it was time for food, he ate the scouts’ precious trope hamster. He played it up as a gimmick but you knew the gruesome reality of it all. The glares and stares from the adults in the room burned deep holes into your back. If you had the option to let the ground swallow you whole, you would’ve taken it.

When it finally came time to pass out the Scouts’ merit badges, that surprisingly went with minimal ease. Again, he was making odd jokes but it wasn’t the worst thing to happen all night. When he got down to your daughter, he was a lot more kind with his words than he was with the other girls. You thought he would’ve blown his cover to her as he went on a 10 minute long speech about how great and deserving she was. He was eventually stopped by the scout leader who cleared her throat to get her attention. You weren’t sure if it was the anxiety you’d been feeling all night, the sweet gesture from Beej, or the look of joy on your daughter’s face, but you were just about on the verge of tears. Despite the craziness of the night and the emotions that were flooding your brain, seeing the two of them laugh together made it all worth it.

****

After a long night out, you were finally back to your apartment. You shuffled through the door with her fast asleep on your shoulder. As soon as you got her in the car, she was out like a light. Now all you had to do was get her into pajamas and put her to bed. As you tucked her in, you could already hear Beej calling in his invisible state. 

“Babydoll~ Told ya’ I was gonna be the best Santa ever. Come on, say my name. Say it so you can sit on Santa’s lap and tell him what you want for Christmas~” His scratchy voice echoed from behind you. 

It took everything in you not to roll your eyes. Thankfully your daughter was fast asleep so she wouldn’t hear anymore of Beej’s lewd humor for the night. You stroked her hair for a second before getting up to walk out of her room, making sure to leave a slight crack in the door. You weren’t free from Beej’s voice as you put some things away and tidied up your living room. He was practically begging for you to say his name. Sure, you were being petty but he put you through hell tonight. A little payback never hurt anyone. Especially when you knew it helped fuel a little feral anger him. Angry Beej was your favorite Beej. 

After about 30 minutes, you could feel the air in the room growing a little warm. You smiled to yourself, finally feeling as though you’d tortured him enough. You whispered his name slowly and sensual as you possibly could. As soon as you finished with the last syllable, you didn’t have time to swat away the thick green smoke surrounding your face before you felt his arms wrap around your waist. His nose was practically touching yours and you noticed the mischievous grin on his face.  It didn’t surprise you that he still had on the Santa costume and soon you felt him pepper quick kisses on your neck. 

“So tell me little girl, have you been naughty or nice this year?” He asked in between kisses. You let out a light giggle as the hairs on his beard tickles your neck. 

“Aren’t you supposed to know that already, Santa?” You asked with added sarcasm on the name. He ignored you as he started nipping at your neck. “Anyway,” You stopped him by grabbing his cheeks with your hands. The way his face looked squished between your hands was too adorable for you to handle. 

“Even though you were giving me anxiety all night, I still wanna say thank you for doing me this favor. It really means a lot.” With your words, you used one thumb to gently rub against his cheek. He didn’t even try to hide the goofy smile that filled his face. The only thing missing from his costume was the Santa hat so you could see the baby pink color that started to creep up strands of his hair.  

“Aw, don’t sweat it, doll. You know I’d do anything for you and the kid.” He said so nonchalantly. It wasn’t until you gave him a fond smile that he realized what he said. It was rare for Beetlejuice to be anything less than crass. Whenever he showed moments of sincerity, it made your heart feel warm. His hair only got pinker as you looked at him with hearts in your eyes. 

“I still want to show my appreciation. Seriously, what can I do to say thanks?” You asked, already knowing the type of answer he’d give. You watched as he acted like he was thinking for a moment. Just as his lip twisted back until an evil smirk, you felt one of his cold hands make his way down to your ass and give a gentle squeeze. 

“Wellllll, how about a kiss under the mistletoe, babes?” He leaned in closer to your face. 

You assumed he would’ve made one appear over you because you didn’t have one hanging anywhere in your apartment. A small puff of green smoke appeared in front of you but when you looked above, there wasn’t mistletoe to be found. Beej still had the arrogant smirk on his face as he watched you look around in confusion. After a second, it finally hit you. You made the mistake of looking down to see said mistletoe resting on the belt above his crotch. When you looked back at him, he wiggled his eyebrows. The annoyed sigh you let out could’ve been heard throughout the whole building. God, this guy was such a dumbass. 

“Well? You gonna thank me or what?” The demon man asked, giving your ass a harder squeeze. You ignored his question and reached down. He seemed to get excited, but you disregarded his expectations that when you plucked the mistletoe off of his belt and held it above your heads. 

“Don’t get too cocky, dweeb.” You saw that he was about to protest but you pushed your lips against his before he could. 

Kissing Beetlejuice was nothing new but somehow this was a little different. You just remembered how sweet he was to your daughter and the interactions they’ve had. You thought about how you loved seeing them together. You thought about how much you loved the three of you being together like a family, like the family you’ve secretly wanted for so long. You put all of those thoughts into the kiss. All the love you had for Beetlejuice, you put into your kiss. 

He was a little flustered at first, but eventually got in sync with you. He could tell you were putting your all into the kiss and was determined to do the same. You dropped the mistletoe to the floor and wrapped your arms around the man’s neck, pulling your bodies closer together. Beej let out a small grunt as you let your tongue slip it’s way into his mouth. You knew exactly what you were getting yourself into with that. Not long after did Beetlejuice shove his own freakishly large tongue until your mouth, and later down your throat. You tried your hardest not to let out a loud moan once you felt the wetness fill up your mouth, but you knew that’s exactly what Beej wanted to hear. 

Even though you wanted to go longer, it would’ve been easier to finish what you started in the bedroom. Your daughter never caught you and Beej in the act, thank God, but there have been times where it was a close call. You hesitantly pulled away from the demon man, and it took a second for his tongue to leave from your throat. You gasped for air as your hands rested on his chest. You could see the ready-to-go feral look on his face as he rested his forehead on yours. 

“Was that a good enough thank you?” You asked, letting out a slight laugh. Beetlejuice let out a heartier laugh as his golden eyes glowed bright like stars. 

“I think I could use a little more convincing.” His scratchy voice echoed through your ears as he leaned down to wrap his arms around your thighs. You didn’t have a second to think as he lifted your body off of the ground and threw you over his shoulder with ease; one hand rested on your thigh and the other held a tight grip on your ass. You tried not to laugh too loudly as he carried your to your bedroom, ending the night in hours and hours of lovemaking. 

With being so wrapped up in each other, you didn’t see your daughter peeking from around the hallway corner. Even though you thought she was fast asleep, Beetlejuice’s presence had woken her up while she tucked you in. She snuck out to watch in both joy and disgust as you two basically made out in the living room. She was glad to see you happy but it was still gross to see her parental figures kissing at all. With Beetlejuice still being in his Santa costume, she was able to put two and two together. She didn’t necessarily stop believing in Santa but she was glad Beetlejuice played the part for her. 

The young girl scurried her way back into her room and gently closed the door so you two wouldn’t hear. Boy, was she gonna have a story to tell her fellow Girl Scouts.

Thank you guys so much for reading! See you guys in the New Year!💚💜🖤 🎉

#beetlejuice x reader #beetlejuice fanfiction #Beetlejuice the musical #beetlejuice #beetlejuice musical

[johnsbleu]

Hold My Hand: John Wick x Reader Chapter 97

warnings: a few quick nsfw moments Hold My Hand Masterlist

The house is almost completely decorated for Christmas even though it’s only the first week of December. You got so excited the day after Thanksgiving, and you went to the store and bought so many decorations. It’s the first time that you and John have been able to really spend Christmas together since he was working this time last year, and you’re so happy to finally have him all to yourself. And instead of going to your mom’s for Christmas, she’s coming to you, which makes you all more excited to show off how nice your house looks for the holidays.

You’re just putting the last touches on the living room while John shovels the walkways and patio since a few inches of snow fell this morning, and you walk over to the window to watch John. His cheeks are tinted red from the cold, and even the tip of his nose has a bit of color too. John waves when he looks at you, and you hold up your mug of warm apple cider to offer it to him.

John told you that Helen used to make it all the time and that he remembered the recipe since it was fairly simple, so he made some this morning. He was so proud of himself when you took a big sip and nodded your head that you liked it, and the smile on his face nearly killed you.

Setting the mug down on the coffee table, you grab the throw blanket and sit down as John comes in and stomps the snow off his boots before he takes off his jacket and removes his boots. He shivers a little as he walks over to sit down next to you, and you wrap the blanket over him and hold him to warm him up.

“You’re so cold,” you laugh, nuzzling into the crook of his neck, “My turn to warm you up, huh?”

John chuckles as he nods, “Yeah, it was a lot colder out than I thought. Hey, the house looks great, by the way.”

“You think so?” you ask, then you shrug as you look around at it, “This is the first time that I’ve been able to really decorate our place. I mean, I did last year, but it was only up for a few days, and you weren’t even home for half of it.”

“Oh, yeah,” John looks over at you and laughs, “I was working then. Anyway, yeah, the house looks great.”

The two of you sit in silence as you look around at the Christmas decorations; the lights strung up, the plump little Santa sitting on the coffee table next to a bowl of cinnamon scented pine cones -- John picked them out because he loved the smell.

One of the things about the living room that you’re always worried about is the fact that the walls are just large glass windows, but you’re starting to warm up to the idea more, especially since it looks beautiful outside with the snow. The Christmas tree is front and center in the window, but it’s bare as of right now since you’ll need John’s help to get lights on it.

“We’ll have to get those lights up on it by tonight.” John says, then he snuggles into your arms, “What have you been doing this morning?”

“Well,” you lean forward a little grab the notebook off the table, “This is probably so dumb, but I really want to do something for your birthday. Before you say anything, let me explain.”

“Baby, it’s fine. I married you, that’s all I would have wanted for my birthday.” he says, and you smile as he reaches over to cup your cheek. “But sure, explain it to me.”

You exhale and look over at him, “We didn’t do anything for your birthday, and I feel bad about it.”

John chuckles as he rubs his thumb over your cheek, “It was three months ago, so it must be really bothering you.”

“Everything was so hectic because our wedding was in just three days, so we just-- I just forgot. I mean, I didn’t forget your birthday, but we just didn’t do anything.” you frown a little, then you perk up and look at John, “I was writing down different ideas for a date night. I want to plan the whole thing for you and surprise you. You do so much for me, so many romantic nights for me, and I want to return the favor.”

John smiles as he nods his head, “That’s sweet.”

You shrug as you hold tight to your notebook since John is trying to take it from you, “No looking! It’s all me. You deserve a surprise.”

“Fine,” he jokingly rolls his eyes and laughs, “Do you have anything in mind yet?”

“I have a few things.” you say as you get up from the couch, and you laugh loudly when he pulls you into his lap and kisses your cheek.

John tucks your hair behind your ear and places another kiss on your cheek, “You look beautiful today, Mrs. Wick.”

“Ah,” you close your eyes and smile, “I’ll never not get butterflies when I hear that. Thanks for reminding me that I’m the wife to an amazing man.”

“Thanks for marrying me.” he laughs against your cheek, “Still don’t understand how I managed that one.”

You wrap your right arm around John’s neck and get situated on his lap, “This is why I want to do something special for you. I want you to know how much I adore you and love you. You’re my favorite person on this planet, and I want you to know that.”

“I do know that,” John lets out a small laugh, “You think I don’t know how much you love me?”

Shrugging, you look down and sigh, “Sometimes I wonder. You just do so much for me.”

“And you do too.” he whispers softly, tilting your chin up so you’ll look at him, “Trust me, I don’t need dates to know that you love me. Just you being here after everything we’ve been through, after everything I’ve told you -- that’s how I know you love me: you’re still here.”

You cup John’s face as you nod your head, growing a little teary eyed, “I’m always going to be here, because I love you. I love this life that we have too. It’s a really good life.”

“It is,” John nods, leaning forward to kiss you as you hug him tighter in your arms.

Tilting your head to the side, you part your lips as John slides his tongue into your mouth, and you hum as his hand glides up your thigh. You lean back and try to look at John as he kisses your neck, “I’m still planning a date, okay?”

“Sure,” he says, paying more attention to getting you upstairs than what you’re saying.

“I mean, you’re probably gonna hate it and everything, but…” you trail off into a bit of a rant as John sucks and kisses on your neck and chest, and he lifts you into his arms as he stands up from the couch and heads up to your bedroom. “I think it’ll be fun for us, and maybe we can -- John, are you listening to me?”

“Yeah,” he says, reaching down as he tries to open the door, but he fails, “Will…will you open the door? Why is the door even shut?”

“I had decorations up here that I didn’t want Bleu to chew on,” you cock up your eyebrow and look at him, “Were you even listening to me?”

John takes a deep breath as he prepares to recite everything you’ve just told him, but he lets it out and laughs, “No, I wasn’t.”

“I said I’m still planning a date.” you hold his gaze as he looks at you, then you reach over and open the door, giving John a disapproving but playful look as he laughs.

“You can plan whatever you’d like and I’ll be on board. I promise.” he say, plopping you down on the bed and immediately laying down on you, “Anything.”

You close your eyes as John kisses down your neck to your chest as he begins to lift up your shirt, and you reach down and cup his face, “Good.”

__

Sitting on your bed, you quickly close your laptop screen when you hear John coming up the stairs, and you close your eyes and sigh in relief when Tess turns the corner with Finn on her hip.

“Hey,” she smiles, setting Finn on the bed and then stretching out her arms and back, “What are you doing? I’ve been calling you all morning, but you didn’t answer. Figured I’d just come over.”

You scrunch your eyebrows up and reach over for your phone, then you sigh when you see it’s gone, “Jonathan Charles Wick! Get your butt up here! And bring my phone!”

Several moments later, you see John poke his head around the corner and smile cheekily, “Hi, baby.”

You put your hand out as John walks into the bedroom, and you tap your palm repeatedly, “My phone.”

John laughs as he pulls your phone out of his pocket, pretending to be shocked when he sees it, “Oh, I must have grabbed yours instead of mine.”

“Oh, save it.” you laugh, taking your phone from him and holding it up, “My case has peaches all over it. I’m positive that you know that this isn’t yours.”

Tess looks back and forth between the two of you and laughs, “What is going on here?”

“I’m planning a date night for John, and he thinks I’m stupid enough to search for everything on my phone.” you say, then you shake your head as you reach out to kiss him, “Get out of here because I’m going to tell Tess about it.”

John chuckles as he leans down to give you a better kiss, then he picks up Finn and kisses his cheek, “Fine, but I’m taking him.”

Tess immediately lays down and closes her eyes, “Thank god. Mommy needs a nap. His bottle is in his bag on the couch if he gets fussy.”

You blow a kiss at John as he leaves, then you open your laptop and look at Tess, “So, I’m planning a date night for John, but you and Jimmy are invited. I want to invite Amanda and Aurelio too -- and their kids. Finny is too little.”

“Ooh, I’m intrigued.” Tess sits up and looks at your laptop.

“90s night at the roller rink in Brighton.” you smile as you look over at Tess, “This place doesn’t just have skating. There’s an arcade, bowling, and laser tag.”

Tess puts her hand over her mouth and laughs, “Shut up! Yes! Let’s do it.”

“John will be totally out of his element, and I’m praying that he loves me enough to do this.” you turn your laptop to show Tess, “They play 90s music all night, and come on, it just looks fun.”

Leaning over to look at the pictures, Tess nods, “I think he’ll have fun.”

“I hope so,” you take a deep breath and look at her, “Are you free tomorrow?”

“Oh, absolutely. I’ll drop Finn off with his Grandma, and then I’m free all night.”

You pick at your nails as you look at your laptop, then you lean down to make sure you clear your search history -- John just can’t stand being out of the loop. You close the laptop and set it aside, then you and Tess head downstairs to see John laying on the living room floor with Finn next to him as they play with some toys.

John is not so patiently waiting for your ovulation day, which is less than a week away at this point, and you’re both hoping like hell that this will be the time. You so badly want to have a baby with him, and you’re just praying that it happens soon.

“Hi, handsome,” you smile as you sit down on the floor next to Finn, and he pulls himself up to you. You look over at John and wink, “You too.”

“John, you’re gonna love this.” Tess says, smiling at him when he sits up, “It’ll be fun, and you love your wife, so you’re not going to complain.”

You scoff, “Yeah, well, we’ll see.”

__

You’re not too thrilled to have to drive in the snow, but you don’t want John to drive because then he’ll know exactly where you’re going. John keeps offering to drive so you don’t have to, but you smile and shake your head.

“I’m not going to get sick, am I?” John asks as you both walk out to the car, and you furrow your brow when you look at him. “Like rollercoasters?”

You laugh as you get in the car, “It’s December.”

“Oh, yeah, true.” John exhales, pulling on his seat belt.

You pull onto the street and begin to drive to Brighton while John fumbles around with the radio to find something to listen to. He lets out a small sigh and reaches into your purse for your phone, then he connects it to the Bluetooth and starts to play a playlist you’ve made of songs for the two of you, and he looks over at you to check for your reaction when one of his favorite songs comes on.

“Ooh, good song choice.”

John smiles as he looks over at you, “This song reminds me of you.”

“Well isn’t that odd?” you glance over at him and smile, “Because it reminds me of you!”

Leaning over to kiss your cheek, John quietly sings along to the song, and you smile when you meet his gaze for a moment before you focus on driving. You’re holding tight to the steering wheel as you drive through the snow, but a smile spreads across your face again as you feel John place his hand on your thigh, causing you to finally relax more.

“I’m excited.” John whispers as he looks at you, leaning closer to kiss your cheek. “Can I have a hint?”

“Hmm…” you tilt your head a little, “I don’t know. Let me think. Well, it could be a sweet date for any age. Families, first dates, teenage couples.”

John laughs, “A carnival?”

“December, John.”

“Oh, yeah.” he chuckles.

“No more guessing, you’re gonna figure it out.” you shake your head and look over at John, “I want to surprise you.”

“Okay, okay,” he laughs, leaning over to kiss your cheek again, “You smell good, baby.”

You smile as you look over at John, and your stomach fills with butterflies when your gaze meets his. How the hell is he your husband? You’re still not quite used to it.

“Hey, am I dressed okay?” he asks, gesturing to his gray t-shirt and denim jeans, “I noticed you were in a t-shirt and jeans, so I just dressed more casual.”

You look over John’s outfit and nod, “Perfect. I love this shirt on you, by the way. You look very handsome.”

“Thanks,” John looks down at it and fixes it, then he inhales deeply and looks over at you again, “Sorry, I keep looking at you.”

“I’ve noticed.” you chuckle softly, then you look over at John, “Why is that?”

John chuckles as he shrugs, “Can’t believe you’re my wife. I’m still having a hard time wrapping my head around it.”

“No shit? Because me too!” you laugh as you look at him, “I can’t believe it. I’m so lucky.”

Reaching over, John places his hand on the back of your head and scratches his fingers against your scalp, “I can’t imagine my life without you, peach.”

You smile softly as you look at John, then you reach over and pinch his cheek lightly, “I really hope you like this.”

John smiles tenderly as he looks at you, “I will.”

__

“Okay, Jonathan, I gotta ask a weird question.”

John chuckles as he looks at you, “Okay.”

“In my purse, there’s a bandana. I need you to put it over your eyes.” you say, and John laughs as he looks at you in disbelief, “Please, baby, I want you to be surprised!”

“Fine,” he chuckles, putting the bandana over his eyes, “Just because you’re so cute.”

Pulling into the parking lot, you wave when you see Amanda and Aurelio have already arrived with their kids, and you pull into a spot next to them. Jimmy pulls up next to you and laughs when he sees John with a bandana over his eyes.

“Stay here.” you get out of the car and walk over to Amanda, “Okay, he has no idea where we are, so we gotta keep it a secret.”

Amanda kneels down next to Benji and looks at him, “Uncle John is getting a surprise, okay? Don’t tell him where we are. Don’t say anything.”

“Got it, mommy!” he says, then he smiles at you.

You open the door and reach for John’s hand, and he laughs as he gets out, “Everyone’s here. You just can’t see them.”

“Hi, Uncle John!”

John chuckles as he blindly reaches out to pat Benji’s head, “Hi, Benji.”

“Okay, I feel bad for the poor thing. Let’s get him inside.” you laugh taking John’s hand as you all head to the building, making sure he doesn’t trip on the stairs. “Oh, there’s going to be music playing, so keep that in mind.”

Pushing the door open, you smile wide when you see the colorful lights strobing around the skate rink, and you squeal a little when you see the arcade is lit up with a black light and neon signs. You turn around and reach up to pull the bandana off of John, and he blinks a few times to get his eyes to adjust.

“Surprise! We’re going skating!” you clasp your hands in front of your chest and wait for John’s reaction.

“Wow…” he laughs as he looks around, then he smiles when he sees his friends. “I never would have guessed this.”

You look at John as everybody walks away to the arcade and skate rental, and you shrug when he looks at you. You bite your lip nervously and shrug again since John isn’t really having a reaction. You look over your shoulder as Tess and Jimmy lace up their skates, then you look to your right to see Benji and Aurelio playing a game in the arcade.

“Hey,” John wraps his arms around your waist and smiles, “This is good.”

“Is it? You didn’t have much of a reaction. If you don’t like this, please tell me and we can go somewhere else.”

John shakes his head and leans down to kiss you, “No, no, this is great! I just…I can’t skate.”

“Are you sure that’s it? Don’t tiptoe around my feelings, it doesn’t help me.”

“I am positive, but…” he pulls you closer and smiles, “I’m willing to put on a pair of skates and let you teach me.”

You smile as you lean up to kiss John and wrap your arms around his neck as he lifts you up. He walks over to Jimmy and Tess with you in his arms, then he sets you down.

“Get your skates!” Tess says, standing up as she looks at you, “I’ll go with you.”

You give John a quick kiss, then you hold hands with Tess as you walk over to get some skates. You sit down on the ground and put them, rolling a little in place to make sure they’re snug, and you smile when you see Amanda tying Benji’s skates.

“Aunt Y/N, will you help me?” he asks, looking up at you, “My mom can’t skate with me because of my little sister, and my dad said he’s too cool.”

Amanda laughs, “No, baby, he didn’t say that. I said he thinks he’s too cool.”

“I would love to help you. Aunt Tess is going to help too!” you say, snapping Benji’s buckle on his helmet.

You take Benji’s hand as he stands up, and he grips so tight to you that your hand turns a little red. He grabs Tess’ hand too, then he slowly skates with you over to the opening to the rink. Tess lets go of his hand so he can hold onto the wall and your hand, and you smile and wave at John as he leans over the wall to watch.

“Can you make it to Uncle John?” you ask, pointing at John as he waves at Benji. You let go of Benji’s hand and stand in front of him, skating backwards as you put your hands out, “I won’t let you fall.”

Jimmy dances past as you laugh, then he quickly skates up behind Tess. You look back at Benji, and you feel John’s hand on your back when you get to him.

“You made it!” you smile at Benji, then you watch him as Jimmy and Tess take his hands and skate with him. You look at John and lean over to kiss him before you dance away from him as you sing along with the song, and you wave him over.

John shakes his head, “Soon though.”

Skating over to Tess, you smile when you see Benji laughing as he clings to Jimmy’s hand, and Tess watches with a smile on her face. You look up as you get closer to John, and you dance by as he talks with Amanda. You stop in front of him and jokingly dance to get his attention, and he reaches out for you, pulling close by your fingertips.

“Amanda, why don’t you skate with Benji?” you ask, and you look over at Aurelio struggling to skate, “Benji convinced Aurelio.”

“Our first date was to the roller rink when we were 17.” she laughs, then she shakes her head, “He’s just as bad now as he was then.”

John looks at her and shrugs, “I can watch Harper.”

Amanda smiles as she hands Harper over to John, then she quickly walks over to get a pair of skates. You look at John as he bounces Harper in his arms, and you lean against the wall and smile as you watch him.

“You look good with a baby.” you smile, then you gasp, “I love this song. I gotta go.”

John and Harper wave at you when you skate away, and you sing the song as Tess skates over to you. The lights start to dim as a disco ball spins in the center of the rink, and you smile when you see Jimmy with Tess, and Amanda and Aurelio with Benji. As you skate past John, you see him bouncing Harper as he sits down on the bench, and you head over to the wall to sit down next to him.

Tess plops down next to John and exhales loudly, “I’m dying of thirst.”

“Wanna head to the arcade?” you ask John as Tess takes Harper, then you get up and change back into your shoes. You hold tight to John’s hand as you head into the arcade, and you smile when he feeds a few dollars to a machine in exchange for some tokens. “So, be honest, are you having fun?”

“I am,” he nods, looking at you, “It’s fun seeing you out there, and now I’m gonna win you something.”

You jokingly roll your eyes as you cling to John’s arm, “Okay.”

John stops in front of a shooting game and winks at you as he puts a token in the machine. He holds up the shotgun and watches as a deer runs across the screen, and he shoots it. He does the same thing several more times until he sees the tickets coming out of the machine.

“Ooh, 10 whole tickets. I can totally get the slap bracelet.” you joke, and John scrunches his eyebrows as he laughs.

“No, I’m winning you that teddy bear.” he says, pointing at the tie-dyed teddy bear hanging on the wall, and you smile as you look at him. “Only the best for my girl.”

__

As soon as John realized that they had laser tag, he couldn’t be convinced not to play. You’re all standing with the ugly little vests on, and it’s husbands against wives, well, it’s John, Jimmy, and Aurelio against you, Tess and Benji since Amanda has Harper, but John offered to watch her again after this round.

“I’m gonna kick your ass in this,” you tease as you look at John, “Just watch.”

John puffs his chest up and scoffs, “Sure.”

You give John one last kiss before you head into the door opposite of the door he’s going in, and you jokingly glare at him as he laughs. Benji clings to your back pocket, and you and Tess both stand in front of him as to protect him so he isn’t out right away.

Tiptoeing slowly into the room, you look around to find a corner for Benji, then you point at it and kneel down, “Wait here, Aunt Tess and I will lure them over to you, then you’ll get them with a sneak attack.”

“You know you’re not whispering very quietly, peach.” John says, and you immediately turn around to protect Benji.

You look over your shoulder at Benji, then you and Tess both begin to tiptoe around the little arena. It’s not completely dark since there’s a light with different strobing colors, but it is really hard to see. You know that John is probably having no trouble at all -- he’s trained for this.

Tess squeals loudly as she runs away from Jimmy who is chasing her, then you hear Benji laughing when Aurelio spots him, which means John is probably stalking right behind you or somewhere near you. Taking a deep breath, you stop in place as you look around, then you immediately turn around as John shoots you.

“You ass!” you shoot John back and laugh as he grabs you by the waist and pushes you against the wall, “Oh, what? You’re gonna kiss me and make it up to me?”

John leans down to kiss you, then he quickly looks over to his left and shoots Tess when she runs past.

“Hey! No fair!” she whines, and you look at John as you laugh.

You shrug a little, “Won’t lie, that was a kinda hot.”

You look down at your vest and see that you only have two red dots left on it, and you look up at John and see he only has two as well. You both hold each other’s gazes, then you immediately shoot him again just as he shoots you.

“One left, peach.” he whispers as he leans down to kiss you, sucking on your bottom lip a little as you lean in for more, but he stops and starts to walk away.

“I’ll find you again.” you say, and John scoffs as he backs away from you, lifting his laser gun up. “You wouldn’t. I’m your wife!”

John smirks as he stops walking, and you look down to see the last red dot has gone out.

“You ass!”

__

“Time to strap some skates on you.” you laugh against his lips, and John jokingly groans. “Don’t worry, no one is going to look at you and laugh. Everyone’s worried about themselves.”

“I just don’t want to embarrass myself in front of you.”

You tilt your head slightly as you smile, “Trust me, you’re not going to. I fell earlier, and I wasn’t embarrassed -- I just laughed!”

“I know, but this is really out of my comfort zone, I can’t lie.” he says, and you nod as you hold his hands. “I love you, I really do. And that is why I am going to get some skates and pray like hell I don’t fall on my face.”

Smiling as you look up at John, you stand on your tiptoes and kiss him as he wraps his arms around you, “I don’t want to make you do anything you don’t want to do.”

“Nah, it’ll be fun.” he says, then he looks over when Benji runs up with his skates, and he looks up at John in hopes that he’ll help him tie them.

“Uncle John, are you gonna come with?”

John nods as he ties Benji’s skates, “Yup, just gotta get my skates.”

Tess and Jimmy are back skating around the rink, and you look over at John before you get your skates. You get your skates on and smile when you see Benji holding tight to John’s hand as he gets a pair of skates. Amanda says something to make John laugh, and he shakes his head as he smiles, putting on his skates. You watch as the two talk, and she reaches over to touch his face.

Amanda is like a little sister to John, and you absolutely adore her. You really look forward to spending more time with her once you have a baby of your own. You know how often Tess and her hang out now since they both have kids, and you totally want in on that. In fact you cried to John the other night because you called Tess to hang out but she was out with Amanda. It’s safe to say you were a little jealous.

You smile at John when he looks up at you, then he waves you over to him. You quickly make your way back over to John, and you reach for his hands, pulling him to stand up as he wobbles in place a little. He looks so incredibly out of place in this setting, but it warms your heart how he really wants to do this. His long limbs looks so funny as he wobbles in place, and you put your hands out to keep him from falling.

“You got this, John!” Amanda laughs.

“Go slow.” John whispers as you start to skate backwards with him to the opening of the rink, then he holds onto the wall and stands up straight. He’s so much taller now that he’s wearing skates, and you strain your neck almost to look up at him. “Okay, I think I can do this.”

You keep your hands out in front of John just in case he falls, but if he does, you’re going down with him. Jimmy skates past and slaps John on his back, causing John to teeter a little, and Jimmy grimaces. You reach out to hold John, but his skate slips from under him, and he holds tight to you with his hand on the back of your head as you both tumble to the floor. You’re both laughing hysterically as people skate past, and you check to make sure he didn’t get hurt.

“You’re good?”

John laughs as he nods his head, “I’m good, you?”

“I’m good.” you get up from the floor and help John back up. “You’re doing great, babe.”

Holding tight to your hands, John starts to gain more confidence as you pull him with you, and you smile at him when he inhales deeply, standing up with even more confidence. You dance to the music and sing along to the song while John watches, and you pull him a little closer to kiss you.

“How are you so good at this?”

You intertwine your fingers with John’s and continue skating backwards, “Tess and I went to the skating rink all the time when we were younger. It was the hangout spot for us. Mom would give us each 10 bucks and tell us to come home for dinner. We’d spend the entire afternoon there, but the best was on weekends because all the cool older kids were there. They taught us some cool moves.”

“Did you go on a date to a roller rink in highschool?”

“You know what? I did!” you laugh as you look over your shoulder a little to make sure you’re not going to run over Benji, then you look back at John, “Though my date wasn’t this fun, and definitely not as cute as you.”

John scoffs, holding tighter to your hand as you start to round the corner a little, “But he was a better skater than me.”

“Actually he wouldn’t even put on a pair. He was so boring, yuck. Never went on a date with him again.” you say, then you shrug, “Anyway, I was a junior in highschool when they closed on local roller rink, so we found one that was about 30 minutes away that had these special nights, just like this, and we’d have a blast.”

“This is fun.” John whispers in your ear, and you lean back and smile at him. “I love you.”

“I love you!” you say, then you cup your hands in front of your mouth and yell, “I love this man!”

Sliding his hands into your back pockets, John pulls you closer and whispers in your ear, “Can’t wait to get you home. I’m dying to taste you, hear you scream my name.”

“Well, this is your birthday party, and whatever the birthday boy wants, he should get.” you say, cocking up your eyebrow.

John leans over the wall and looks at you, “Yeah?”

“Yup,” you hop onto the wall and scoot in front of John as you lean closer to his ear, “Can’t wait to get home either, then I can feel you in my mouth, taste you on my tongue…”

John bites his lip as you lean back to look at him, then he looks down at his watch, “Damn, it’s getting late.”

“Shut up!” you laugh as you hop off the way and skate away from John.

__

You’re holding tight to the tie dye teddy bear that John won for you as he drives home, and you melt when you see the sweetest smile on his face. He won the bear for you after he actually skated with you for a bit, then he pulled you back to the arcade because there was photo booth calling your names. Today went exactly as planned, except for falling several times with John, but that’s okay! He laughed it off and stood back up, and he was determined to get around the rink once without falling.

“I had a lot of fun today, mouse.” he says, glancing over at you, “Thank you for today.”

You reach over and place your hand on his thigh, “You’re welcome. Thanks for indulging me. I know you were so out of your element, and it warmed my heart how you badly you tried to skate, but sweetheart, you’re awful.”

John laughs loudly, nodding his head, “Skating is not my forte.”

“I could see that.” you chuckle, then you lean up to kiss John’s cheek before he pulls into your driveway, “I can already tell I’m covered in bruises from falling so much.”

Groaning a little, you get out of the car and rotate your neck as you rub a sore spot on your lower back, then you look at John as he rubs his left knee before he gets out of the car -- it’s always the left knee.

“Knee bothering you?” you ask, and John nods. “Well, look, I got a present for you--”

John shakes his head, “No.”

“It’s your birthday! Sort of! Just let me give you a birthday present, Jonathan!”

John is still giving you a disapproving look as he unlocks the door, and you roll your eyes as you start to take off your jacket.

“Christmas is only a few weeks away.” John walks over and turns on the Christmas lights, then he gestures to the tree, “There’s already gifts under it for me.”

“Oh, like you don’t have gifts around the house in your sneaky little spots.” you laugh, walking back over to him, “Just let me give you my present.”

Taking a deep breath, John exhales and sits down on the couch, groaning quietly when he bends his knee, “Fine.”

You clap your hands as you walk over to the tree and find the gift you tucked behind it, then you sit down on the couch next to John and hand him the bag with a huge smile on your face.

“There’s a few things in there.”

John leans over to kiss your cheek as you watch him, then he turns his focus to his gift. He reaches into the bag and pulls out something, pulling back the tissue paper to see it, and you watch the smile spread across his face when he sees a wedding picture of the two of you.

“Oh, wow…” John smiles as he looks at you, and you shrug as you grow nervous.

“Look, I know this isn’t something you’d usually get your husband, but we just bought the record player last month, and I had the idea of doing this for our anniversary, but…” you lean over and pull out the vinyl record, “It’s the song we had our first dance to.”

John wraps his arm around you and smiles, “I love it. I’d say we should put it on and dance, but I think it’s safe to assume we’re both very sore.”

“Yeah,” you nod, then you gesture to the bag so he can look at what else you got him.

No matter what the occasion, you always make sure to put a bag of M&Ms in it for John, and he’s always so excited about it. He reaches in and pulls out a small box, then he opens it to remove a nice new leather wallet.

“I noticed your old one is getting a little worn out.”

John chuckles, “I actually was just thinking about buying a new one -- or hinting at it for Christmas. You know me so well, peach. What else do we got in here?”

You watch John closely as he reaches his hand back into the bag, and you smirk when he pulls out a bottle of massage oil. He looks it over as he reads the box, then he looks up at you, a wide grin spreading across his face.

“Kinda perfect since we’re both so sore,” you say, taking it from John to read the side, “The oil blend promotes deep tissue softness while also providing a natural slip. Creating passionate sex and massage ability.”

John laughs as he looks at you, “Say that one part again, about the slip.”

Leaning closer to John, you brush your lips against his and smirk as you whisper, “A natural…slip.”

The two of you maintain eye contact as you slide your hand up his thigh to the bulge in his pants, and you stand up from the couch, groaning loudly from the pain in your back while John puts his hand on his knee and winces.

“Baby, you know I love you. You know how much I want you…” John says, and you start to nod in agreement before he even says anything. “I want you all the time, every single day, but I don’t think my body is going to allow it tonight.”

“You and me both.” you laugh as you look at John, “Why don’t we just go lay down?”

John winces as he stands up from the couch, then the two of you shuffle off slowly to the stairs, dreading the fact that you’ll have to get up them somehow. You both groan and wince as you get up, and you start to laugh as you reach your room.

“So, this is what it’s going to be like when we’re old, huh?” you slowly make your way over to your side of the bed and start to undress.

“Well, I’m already old, so, yeah…” he jokes, then he furrows his brow when he sees the large bruise on your thigh. He quickly pulls his clothes and gets into bed, grabbing the lotion off your nightstand so he can rub your back. “Lay down.”

You toss your clothes in the hamper near the dresser, then you look down at Bleu as he lays at the foot of the bed, “We’ll have to give him extra t-r-e-a-t-s tomorrow since he didn’t get to go for a w-a-l-k tonight.”

“He’ll be fine. Come here,” John pats the bed and smiles as you lay down on your stomach, and you close your eyes when you feel the cold lotion on your bare back. “Thank you again for today. I love you so much.”

Opening your eyes, you look up at John and smile, then you move closer to lay against his chest, “I wanted to do something nice for you, and I promise next year that we’ll do something on your actual birthday.”

“I’m not worried about it, but I am happy to know I have such a thoughtful wife.” he whispers, moving your hair away from your face. “You looked so cute skating out there. I’m still amazed by the fact that you were so good.”

You jokingly brush your hair off your shoulder, “Well, ya know.”

“You looked sexy.” John laughs, then he leans closer, “I’ll admit it, I’d love to go there again some time. I liked the laser tag.”

“When we have kids, huh?” you say, and John nods. “Sweet little family day there, that’d be fun. Speaking of kids, that’s part of the reason why I wanted to do this now. I’m still on track for my ovulation day, which is only a few days away -- so fucking exciting. But I was thinking, if we waited until spring to go do this, I might be pregnant by then, or who knows, I could be pregnant on your birthday. So, really, this was just me being selfish.”

John chuckles as he leans down to kiss you, “Not at all. I had so much fun with you today, with our family too.”

You bite your cheek as you begin to tear up, “I love when you refer to them as your family. I’m sorry, it’s just so cute. They all love you so much, I hope you know that. As soon as I called Amanda and told her, she was immediately on board, same with Aurelio. They adore you, baby.”

“They love you too.” he says softly, leaning down to kiss you again, “Benji has a huge crush on you, by the way. He told me that he thought you were very pretty.”

Letting out a small laugh, you look up at John, “So sweet.”

“Amanda kept asking if I thought you were pregnant yet -- not that she thought you looked pregnant or anything. She just knows how much we want to be.”

You smile as you reach over for your phone to look at your ovulation app, then you turn it to show John, “Just a few more days, Wick, and you and I could be makin’ a baby.”

“I can’t wait.” John smiles softly, then he presses a kiss to your forehead as you snuggle into his arms, “I can’t wait.”

__

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** i updated my tag list recently, so if i missed you, just let me know! make sure you have tagging turned on!

#john wick x reader #john wick x you #john wick imagine #fic: hold my hand #i want to live inside this chapter #like they're all just having fun and i want that #i can't even explain how excited i am for these next few chapters #anyway i hope u all enjoy! #:))))) love yall

[kpop-cakepops]

Help// Johnny Seo

Anonymous asked:

“heyyy! can i make a request? Since i love suffering can i ask for some heavy angst with Johnny but with a happy ending since my heart is still weak? I'll love you forever if you make it possible💕”

(I had to repost this this way because for some reason the post couldn’t be found when I searched it on the search bar.)

word count: 2,864

WARNINGS: Toxic relationship (mental/emotional a*use), mentions of drug and alcohol a*use, attempted su*cide.

SPECIAL NOTE: If you are someone that is in need of instant help or that is battling su*cidal thoughts or abuse, here are some resources that might be of help. You are loved.(( Domestic violence crisis hotlines  Su*cide prevention Crisis Centers ))

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was complicated, to say the least.

Whatever type of bond you'd managed to concoct with Johnny Seo was twisted and cryptic and muddy and unlabeled. You found yourself often spending nights tangled in a spiral of lust, sweat and limbs with him, only to wake up the next morning and find him gone.

Uncertain.

If you had to describe Johnny with one word only, you'd choose uncertain. One moment he was by your side, the other he was gone. One moment he wanted to hold you and tell you about his dreams of making it big, the other he was in your face yelling and screaming rabid hell your way... just as he was doing right at that moment.

"MAYBE IF YOU WEREN'T WHORING YOURSELF OUT TO JUST ANY DUDE THAT LOOKS YOUR WAY, MAYBE I WOULDN'T BE THIS MAD!" he screamed.

You, however, only walked past him. A numb expression plastered on your face.

Used to it.

"He offered to buy me a drink and I accepted. Get the fuck over yourself." You grumbled as you flopped on your couch and started to work at the strap of your heels.

"I don't think you're understanding here. I don't  like it when people look at or touch what's mine." He fumed. His volume was lower, but the anger and bite were still there, almost like he wanted to hurt you with his words.

He did.

"You're so unfair." You let out as you stood up, your height now dwarfed by his due to your lack of heels. "Do you have any fucking idea how I felt when  I saw you dancing with all those girls?! ON MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY, JOHNNY."

He held onto your wrist stopping you from stomping away from him. "Why, were you jealous?" He asked with a raised brow looking down at you provokingly.

"No... no I wasn't jealous but I did wonder why I had to put up with someone like you on my fucking birthday. I wondered why I keep wasting my time here when I could be with someone that will take me seriously. Someone that only has eyes for ME and who would be okay with just laying in bed with me and hold me-" you choked up unable to continue.

It was always the same. He'd yell, you'd yell back, he'd poke and prod at you until you cried. A cycle.

You shoved past him and stomped into your bathroom ready to shower and praying he'd be gone by the time you got out. You weren't exactly lucky....

By the time you stepped out of the bathroom you found Johnny sat on the ground, his back pressed to the side of your bed. "I'm sorry..." he mumbled barely audibly.

You ignored him and stepped up to your dresser. Your reflection only causing a tear to roll down your cheek as you untangled your hair. You really wondered when your reflection had become something you hated.

Warm hands wrapped around you from behind. Johnny's chin now resting on your shoulder. "I'm sorry... I really am sorry that I'm this fucked up. I'm sorry."

You remained silent as you stared at both of you in your mirror. It seemed that the 2 people you'd been when you met 2 years before had disappeared. "Johnny... what are we going to do?" You finally ask.

His eyes meet yours on the mirror and you could tell he's confused. "What?"

"In the future. What do you want? Who do you want to be?" You pried his hands from your body and turned so you were facing him with your arms crossed.

He was scared.

"I don't  know." He admitted. "What do you want?"

"I want to fall in love" you admitted looking at the ground. "I want to fall in love, I want to get married... I want to have a family."

Something in your words caused Johnny to lose his breath. "What does that mean?" He asked.

"It means that I'm scared, John. I'm scared that I'm gonna be stuck being in love with you all by myself for the rest of my life. I'm scared that I'm gonna be stuck chasing after you all my life. I don't want that." You finally let out.

Johnny didn't like it when you talked that way. It scared the daylights out of him to hear you talk about commitment and a family. Why couldn't life be simple? Why couldn't love be easy?

"I..." he couldn't bring himself to say it. He knew he loved you. He knew he wanted you to be with him forever. You were, after all, the reason he was sane and sober. Yet to you, his lack of words meant he didn't.

"You understand that I can't do this forever right?" You finally asked. He wasn't looking at you, his hands were clasped to his sides and his eyes locked on the ground. You waited for him to say something, anything to stop you from doing what you were about to.

"Johnny?" You asked almost pleading him to speak.

He didn't.

"I think you should go." You spoke again. He visibly flinched at that. His eyes finally snapping up to meet your teary ones. "This isn't going to work. I don't have the strength nor the patience to do this anymore. You can pick up your things some other day, but for now please just go"

"Y/N-"

"Go." You groaned not wanting to give in. You knew that if you let him talk he'd somehow convince you to not end things the way you were.

So he left and didn't return. Johnny had gotten the message very clearly. You didn't want to see or hear from him and he tried to understand.... but why was his heart hurting as much as it did. Why were people asking him if he was okay? Why was it that whenever he fucked some random girl in a bathroom stall of whatever musty club he'd stumbled into, all he could think of was you?

Why would he cry?

It would stop at some point, right? He'd stop hurting and crying over you someday, right?

Right. He stopped.

He wasn't sure what scared him most, the previous pain of not seeing you or the fact that he was no longer feeling anything at all. The fact that he was numb all the time and every single emotion he showed was a half-assed reflection of what his friends and the people around him were feeling... yet none of that was real, none of those feelings were his. Johnny couldn't even pinpoint the last time he'd genuinely laughed in the past 4 months... the 4 months he'd spent away from you.

Falling down a spiral of old bad habits is exactly what Johnny found himself doing. Medicating and drinking until he was hallucinating about you, it was the only way he could feel what he used to feel. It was the only way he could see you.

It's also how he found himself calling you in the middle of the night.

"Hello?" You groaned.

"Why do we have to have a label?" He asked, voice slurred. "Why can't we just continue to say we're just friends? Why do we have to complicate shit so much? No one labels shit nowadays, why do we have to be different?"

"Johnny?" You asked. The sleep was gone out of your voice as soon as you realized the state he was in.

"If you want to hear it so bad, then yes. I love you. I fucking love you" he exclaimed into the phone. "At first I just wanted us to fuck but-"

"John, you're drunk. Where are you?" You snapped already putting on pants to go look for him.

"Let me fucking finish!" He yelled causing you to freeze on the other end of the line. "At first I just wanted us to fuck. You were hot and you were fine with it... but then suddenly, I stopped medicating and you gave me the spare key to your house, I was spending nights at your place talking to you about my stupid fucking dreams..."

He stopped talking and only then did you realize you were crying. You were already on your way to his apartment which was only 2 blocks from your complex. "Johnny?"

No answer.

A sense of panic invaded your senses and you started to run the rest of the way to his place hanging up the phone you found his spare key almost immediately above the door frame. Your panicked form stumbled into the dark apartment and towards his bedroom. The stench of alcohol took over the entire place, almost as if he'd purposely filled every crevice of his apartment with liquor.

"John?!" You called.

There was no answer but the soft sniffles coming from his bedroom had you instantly running his way. Sure enough, there he was, resting against a corner of the dim lit room. His knees were up to his chin and his arms were splayed to his sides with his phone laying  several feet away from him.

"Shit" you mumbled and walked up to him. "Johnny. Hey, can you hear me?" You asked as you took his face into your hands. He was running a fever.

"Y/N. You have to run away. Love isn't shit. Everyone leaves in the end, Y/N you need to run before you end up like everyone else" he sobs.

A tight knot forms in your throat as you hear him cry. It was a first and you hated it. You hated it to no end. "Johnny, you're running a fever. How much did you drink?" You ask trying your best not to cry. If you cried you'd lose it and what Johnny needed was help, not another reason to feel bad.

The intoxicated man pointed at the splay of bottles across from him and you cursed internally when you spotted what seemed like an empty xanax bottle next to the many bottles of liquor. "Oh god... oh my god. Oh God, did you take that?! Johnny did you take the xanax with the alcohol?" You wanted to scream.

You needed to take him to the hospital.. Your shaky hands reached for your phone and you instantly called 911 to get an ambulance to his place as soon as possible.

Everything that followed happened as if in slow motion. There were paramedics and an ambulance, people asking you questions, but you were too shaken up to even form a proper sentence.

When you got to the hospital you called Taeyong, Johnny's best friend. "Y/N!!-"

You cut him off instantly, "Tae, Johnny was medicated and drunk. I don't know how much he took but he's running a fever. I'm freaking out please come to the hospital. Taeyong I'm scared." you cried.

"What do you-"

"ASK QUESTIONS LATER TAEYONG, I NEED YOU TO PLEASE COME TO THE HOSPITAL!" you yelled still on the brink of having a mental breakdown.

Almost two hours had passed and you found yourself still sat in the emergency waiting room, your hair unmade as you waited next to Taeyong for the doctor to come out and tell you what room Johnny would be moved to. You had cried yourself dry by then, Taeyong's hand rubbing up and down your back to calm you down until you were both silent.

"Why did you go see him?" He asked.

"He called me... he didn't sound okay"

"When has Johnny ever been okay?" Taeyong countered.

You didn't answer because you knew he was right, Johnny had never been okay. Not before you, not with you and most definitely not after you. You used to think that you were doing him good by letting him depend on you for his well-being... and yet there you were waiting for him to finish getting his stomach pumped or suctioned whatever they did in cases like this.

"I thought I was helping him" you mumbled.

"Johnny needs professional help, Y/N. We can't help him alone, you can't help him alone. Look where we are. What would have happened had he not called you?" Taeyong snapped.

You could feel his angry gaze on you and you knew he had every right to be angry. Everyone around you both had warned you, everyone had asked you to be careful... but you both chose to go your own toxic way. You called it 'loving intensely' when in reality you were both so in love that you didn't know how to properly show it, instead playing a game of cat and mouse. Chasing, capturing, yelling, fucking, apologizing, never truly valuing the feelings you two really felt for each other... why? Because it wasn't cool? Because other people told you that love wasn't a real thing? Because labels were fucking stupid and both your parents were divorced and bitter?

"I know." You whimpered.

"John Seo?"

You almost sprinted towards the nurse as he called out Johnny's name. "That's us."

"The patient is stable. Had you come in an hour later we wouldn't have run into the luck we did today. He's going to be moved to an observation unit shortly. Just go to the lobby and they'll give you the number." The nurse looked at you sternly as he spoke. "And miss... if you and your boyfriend are seeking help, we have many programs we can recommend. We wouldn't ever want to see a young man like that lost to an addiction."

You looked over at Taeyong who was staring back at you knowingly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Johnny woke up only a few hours later, you were seated right beside his bed. Your head resting on the edge of the soft bedding, eyes closed and breath shallow. You were asleep.

Johnny's eyes took in his surroundings. His daze dissipating and final realization coming to him upon hearing the light beeping of the heart monitor beside him as well as the slight tightness of the IV stuck to his arm. His head fell back into his pillow and he wanted to scream.

Your eyes opened instinctively at the slight movement. "John?"

He looked down at you and met your eyes for the first time in 4 months. To say he felt suddenly disarmed would be an understatement. He wanted to rip that IV out of his arm and drop to his knees in front of you. Beg for your forgiveness. Tell you that he... loves you.

"You almost..." you trailed off. How were you supposed to bring it up? There was a tight knot in your throat and a horrible twisting of your stomach.

"I know" he rasped out, taking you by surprise. Your worried eyes moved to meet his teary ones. "I know because I was planning to go"

It was like all air had been suddenly knocked from you. "y-you mean... that was supposed to be goodbye?" you asked.

He stayed silent for a few seconds. "It was. Then I heard you screaming my name and I realized that I didn't want it to be. I realized I didn't want to die."

You weren't breathing. How could he... how could he want to end it all? How could he be so willing to throw his life away. Your throat was so tight as you bit back sobs. How could you have failed him this bad? "Johnny, I love you," you murmured as you felt his large hand take yours. "I'm so sorry, Johnny. I don't want you to die. I want you to live. I want you to be okay. I want us to be okay."

"Can we be okay? Haven't we done too much?" he asked shutting his eyes. He wasn't sure if he was tired, or if he just couldn't bear to look at the dark circles under your eyes. Probably caused by him.

"We've done too much of the wrong things and not enough of the right ones, Johnny... I want us to get better. We need help." You uttered. "Let's get help. You and me, professional help. They have so many programs, so many rehab centers to help people like us."

He didn't say anything to that. Johnny knew he needed the help, but he wasn't sure his ego would ever allow him to get the help he needed, especially if it meant being away from you again... Yet one look at your tired form did it for him. One look at you triggered the dark memories of the previous night. The way you cried by his drugged up, almost dead body. He remembered how much he wanted to live. He remembered the future he saw slipping through his fingers when he thought he'd be gone.

"Okay"

You looked up at him, he was avoiding your gaze, but something deep inside told you he was being serious.

"Let's get help... let's get better... and when we do, let's properly meet again, and give that future you want- no, that future we want a shot," he answered giving your hand a squeeze.

Relief invaded your entire being, a sigh of relief leaving your lips unconsciously. "Okay... we'll give it as many shots as you want."

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SPECIAL NOTE: If you are someone that is in need of instant help or that is battling su*cidal thoughts or abuse, here are some resources that might be of help. You are loved.(( Domestic violence crisis hotlines  Su*cide prevention Crisis Centers ))

#Johnny suh #john suh #johnny suh au #johnny suh scenarios #johnny seo scenarios #johnny nct #johnny suh nct #nct one shot #nct 17 #nct #nct u #angst #johnny angst #johnny suh angst #johnny suh one shot #johnny seo one shot #johnny suh fanfic #nct fanfic #fanfic #nct angst

[mooncruiser]

Heyy!! I’ve been meaning to pin my testimony, so here it is :)

So, my life wasn’t really the greatest growing up. I mention C-PTSD in my bio, and that’s what I’ll get into a bit. I’ll try not to be too graphic, but I can’t guarantee it’ll be totally safe.

There were some questionable things in my toddler years, a neglectful daycare center for 3 months, my dad being in and out of my life due to fear of getting attached at first, him flying off the handle once with me (my mom got on him for it, so it never happened again) but I think the trauma started with my cousins leaving me stuck out in a baby swing twice, a near death experience with a dog bite, and a homicidal attempt on me and my mom by my sister, who was 16 at the time (I’m 5 years old). 

There was also the dog cage incident I believe at…6 years old? Me and my brother were playing and he forgot me on accident. I pretty much accepted at this point that life was gonna chain me up and try to kill me lol, but it let up for a good while, and I had a pretty decent childhood. At 9 years old, there was the torturously loud school program in the gym I had to sit through for 2 hours, I think. 

It was at 10 when things became chronically ongoing. Domestic violence at home from my sister (physical, emotional abuse on me and my family), more physical and emotional abuse at school from my assistant teacher because I was on an IEP for my autism. At 11, I was sexually abused by my female friend who was 12, and her female cousin, who was 13. I was abandoned by my cousins and aunt, and I was being placed in a seclusion room at school during standardized tests (which was sensory deprived solitary confinement) even after I was finished for the day. At 12 years old, I started being emotionally neglected by my mother.

I mean, I was so angry and depressed and secretly suicidal at 10, but by 12 I was severely dissociating (I had been dissociating during trauma at various times prior). I had so much fear and anxiety that by the time I was 13 I’d be feeling like passing out 24/7, so I got on meds, which only helped the more severe physical symptoms, I guess. 

At 13, I started being groomed by this high school girl that liked me. She was a Sophomore, and I was in 7th grade. She noticed the neglect and told me she knew me better. She would give me gifts, teach me to ship gay pairings, gave me a gay pedophilic manga. Shamelessly told me she had sexual relations with her male cousin and his friends who were around my age. I blocked it out. 

I also had a very abusive friendship with a girl online who had BPD. My assistant teacher, who came with me to middle school, restrained and tortured me with the marching band’s loud music in the hallway, which only intensified my dissociative symptoms (I was actually switching alters at this point regularly and having no idea).

I remember at 13 being confused about my gender and sexuality. My mom was no help and just wanted me to hide it from my family and everyone else, for reputation purposes and she didn’t want me bullied. That was actually how I decided to get in contact with my grooming abuser, which I wonder at this point whether that was my fault. I didn’t expect her to really take over like she did, but I was essentially brainwashed into accepting whatever I was feeling for her benefit. I just wanted advice and a friend. 

I was so lonely, I had been desperate for friends for years, and I was desperate for someone to love me in any way, honestly. I was overeating. I’d spend hours daydreaming, in video games or entertainment to escape from school and everything else. During meltdowns, I’d be doing self injurious behaviors. 

So by 14, I come out as a lesbian. Had a couple relationships with girls who just saw me as a sexual object (I remember saying yes to sexual things even though I didn’t want to, just so that they wouldn’t abandon me. Dissociating off and finding it disgusting), would cheat on me with multiple people, ignore me for new friends, etc. 

The BPD friend I dated, when I broke up with her, immediately attempted suicide so that scarred me more into our trauma bond. She’d show me self harm pics she took from time to time. It scared me into making sure I didn’t trigger her again, but u know I never knew what triggered her in the first place, so, like with everything else, I had no strategy to life. It was either fight, run, dissociate or nod yes to everything. She took up the latter lol. 

I came out as trans my Freshman year, and stayed that way into my Sophomore year. I was bitter about dating because of the whole sexual object thing, and full of shame at the same time, thinking no one would want me. I thought I was asexual. I tried out a career high school honestly just to get away from the memories of my old school. 

Some feelings about being trans started to fade, but not entirely, so I went by genderfluid/genderqueer from 17-19. I was excited to make new friends at my new school, but my anxiety kept me from it. I opened up very awkwardly about my dating history to one girl (which tbh I shouldn’t have, but I had been brainwashed so lol) and she told all the girls in my lab, and I was excluded and bullied (and cyberbullied) from thereon. 

I didn’t know it at first, it was so subtle. But once I knew, I tried standing up for myself and told the principal, which made them leave me alone for the most part. They’d glare at me, use me at graduation, cyberbully me one last time 8 months after graduation, and that was it. I still had to deal with domestic violence until I was 22, but once I graduated everything pretty much hit me.

I knew I’d be too stressed out to go to college or work. School indoctrination tried to teach me to be neurotypical and expect this, but it wasn’t happening. I was too afraid to leave my house for a year, and too afraid to be honest online for fear of being watched and bullied, or stalked. I was seriously considering suicide down the line. I thought I had nothing left to live for. I was useless. Nobody cared. Friends moved on to their new lives and I was dying. 

That’s when Jesus stepped in.

I guess I started being curious about God again for the first time since I was 12. I always believed in God, was grateful to Him for being there for me during the domestic violence and never blamed Him for it. I found out about worship music and was thrilled, and a question came up. Was being gay a sin? My grooming abuser taught me that God made me gay, so it was alright. But I wanted to know for sure this time from the Word. 

To my surprise, she was wrong. The Bible said it was indeed, a sin (the practice, not so much the identity aspect). I couldn’t piece together why, so I struggled with it for months. On my 20th birthday however, when I got done creating fanart of a gay pairing, I felt strongly convicted by the Holy Spirit that it was wrong. So I went to God.

I said, “If it is wrong, please change me so I can make You happy, because I love You. In the meantime, I won’t do anything in support of it for a while. If it’s not wrong, don’t change me, and I’ll know which way is right because I trust You.” When I look back on it, it was a pretty crazy prayer. Lots of people have said they couldn’t “pray the gay away”, and I do wonder what the difference was with me.

After 3 months, I stopped to check if I still felt anything, and the feelings were gone. My gender dysphoria was gone, too. I was way too afraid to tell anybody yet, but I remember when I did, one of the first people I told was my grooming abuser. 

She was livid, tried one last time to intimidate me. Another time we crossed paths (she came out of nowhere saying hi, said she worked at that market, complimented me and walked away smiling) and I was triggered, I messaged her and told her how she hurt me and I couldn’t bear to be around her anymore, but I hoped she’d have a good life. She didn’t respond online, but she complained to my sister that I thought she was a predator, and by the end of the conversation tries to get her to tell me she said hi. When she had kids, she was planning on raising them to be nonbinary. Her husband was abusive to them, so she ended up losing them. She never bugged me again. 

I was blown away by how God had changed me. How He opened my eyes to the truth. I prayed for Him to open my eyes to whatever else I had been blind to, and He slowly began lifting off the amnesia surrounding all my traumas, urging me towards recovery with Him. I realized I might have OSDD-1b recently as well, which is strange that I could have possibly had DID prior to losing my amnesia? 

I have been on this journey ever since, journaling, blogging, researching, and finally in a wonderful therapy called EMDR where I truly release the traumas from my body, hear God’s new positive beliefs to replace old negative ones from my childhood, and experience loving extraordinary visions while processing that teach me to focus on Jesus, trust Him more, love and pray for my enemies, and have a real satisfying relationship with Him that’s unattainable with anyone on Earth, along with daily Bible study. 

The picture on the left was me at 16 in my old life, the one on the right is me in my new creation :) God bless all of you, thank you for reading this far 💕💖

#testimony #long post

[kirishwima]

Hey lovely! Would you write some headcanons about Jumin, V, Zen & Seven dealing with MC who has a hard time accepting compliments? From awkwardly laughing them off, straight out denying then or even believing they're meant to be ironic? Loves to you ❤

oof i relate to this a lot tbh ;-; hope you’ll like it~!

JUMIN:

* For him, MC is the most beautiful person he’s ever seen

* He doesn’t care wether he’s objectively right or not-and since when was beauty something that can be decided by a checklist or popularity?

* The gentleness in MC’s eyes, the way they laugh, their gait-everything was absoloutely stunning to him, and he couldn’t help but voice his thoughts as much as possible

* He was taken aback the first time MC laughed to his face when he mentioned just how beautiful they are. Why were they laughing? Did he say something funny?

* “Ah, nice one Jumin”, they’d sigh, tears forming at the corners of their eyes from how hard they’d laughed, “but it’s not nice to joke around like that.”

* He was so confused???? Nothing of what he said was meant to be funny??? When he told them so, MC just shook their head and told him it’s impossible that he’s serious. How could he?? It’s Jumin freaking Han??? The most beautiful man alive???? And he was calling them beautiful?!

* The mere thought of MC thinking of themselves as anything else than heavenly infuriated him. He needed his beloved to know just how he saw them.

* And so he comissioned a painter to paint MC the way he viewed them; their appearance exactly as is, only with a pair of wings sprouting from their back, the light in the painting’s background forming an almost halo around their head.

* He brought them to the painting after a night out, pulling MC into an embrace as they both looked to the painting.

* “You’re my light in the dark, an angel that saved me when I needed help the most. I’ll never let you think of yourself as anything less than that.”

* He knew it’s not possible to change MC’s thoughts from one day to the other. But he’d try. God, he’d try.

ZEN:

* Dating an actor was hard

* Dating an actor that was as beautiful and charismatic as Zen was even harder

* And dating a literal marble statue when you have the self-esteem of a limp noodle is nearly impossible;

* Zen would constantly compliment MC, call them his beloved prince/princess/royalty, his sweetheart, his beloved; and each time MC would brush it off, would laugh a forced giggle and leave it at that

* Zen frowned each time, but he didn’t give up. Instead he only upped his ante, complimenting MC about anything and everything he found attractive about them, from their delicious cooking, to the way their cheeks blushed when he kissed them.

* And still-nothing! MC would roll their eyes, laugh, or flat-out ignore Zen’s words, moving on as if he’d never uttered them.

* Eventually Zen called MC out on it, furstrated as to why they refused to even acknowledge Zen’s words, and the answer...boy, it tore his heart in two.

* “I’m just-” MC started, their words caught in their throat, “I’m not-you’re you you know? You’re gorgeous, you’re funny, you’re sweet and I’m just-I’m nothing near that, I don’t-” tear formed at their eyes, threatening to spill “I don’t know what you see in me.”

* Zen was FLOORED. His sweetheart felt this way all this time and he didn’t even realise?!?!?!

* From then on he swore he’d never shut up about how gorgeous his MC was. NEVER. He’d tell them how much he loved them and why until his dying breath, promising to show them every day until they started to believe it too.

* He’d absoloutely talk like the love-struck fool he is about MC in interviews, telling the entire world how and why he was so enarmored with this person. He’d let no person think anything less of his MC, not even MC themselves.

V:

* This boy LOVES MC. Do you hear me? LOVES.

* Everything about them is just-God!! He just loves them so much!! Everything they do, eveyrthing they say, they’re his saving grace, he loves them like a praying man loves his gods-his love is bigger than religion, bigger than life.

* To him it’s almost terrifying how much he could fall for another person. When he thought there’d be no one else for him than Rika, when he thought he would never deserve love again, when he pondered wether he’d ever felt love at all-this single person came around and swept all those worries away, replacing them isntead with gentle kisses, touches so tender they made his skin crawl. His love was terryfing, and he wanted to let it seep into his bones, fill him from the inside out.

* So he wanted to do nothing more than to let MC know of this, everyday of his life. He’d greet them in the morning with kisses and compliments, loving even the way their hair would stick up in all sorts of directions when they lifted their head off of the pillow.

* He was so proud of MC, reminding them how smart they were whenever he saw them working hard at their job or studies, placing a kiss to the nape of their neck and telling them how bright they were.

* And yet MC never seemed to acknowledge any of his words. They’d smile, a forced thing that pained V’s heart to see, would mumble a thanks and immediatly carry on the conversation as if he’d never mentioned anything in the first place.

* He wasn’t a fool-he’d been at the very same place MC was, knew what it was like to hear words you couldn’t believe in. It took him so long to start believing in himself, and it was only with MC’s help that he could ever start doing so. MC was his pillar, and he wanted to be their pillar too.

* He tried to explain why he felt the way he did-prove to MC that each of his compliments was fact-based. They were beautiful because beauty is subjective, and to him beauty came from within. They were smart because they worked hard and were always eager to learn, were bright because their smile would always make him smile too.

* He often centered his pieces, be it paintings or photographs, around MC, would try and capture the reasons he loved them so with his lens and paintbrush, mere mediums to express the feelings burning him from the bottom of his ribcage.

* It wasn’t easy. If he could open MC’s chest and take their insecurities out of their soul he would, but it doesn’t work that way, so for now he’d be content to just love MC until they too started to love themselves. It worked with him afterall, and he wanted it to work for MC too.

* He wanted to be their light too.

SEVEN:

* Hoo boy

* Mr.Insecurities over here never accepts compliments either, turning them into jokes or flat out rolling his eyes at them, thinking it’s just irony.

* So he instantly knew MC does the same when, as he leaned back after kissing them and telling them how beautiful they were, MC simply rolled their eyes, a snarky smile on their lips.

* Seven frowned at that, grabbed MC’s cheeks with his hands, making their lips turn into a silly fishy pout.

* “Now you listen here you sass master” he chided, “you. are. beautiful. In every single way. Words won’t bring you down!”

* ‘Seven are you quoting Christina Aguilera to me right now-”   “YES I DO SHE HAS A POINT, SHUT UP OKAY”

* Jokes aside, he let go of MC’s cheeks to bring them into a bone-crushing hug, tugging their head to his chest.

* “Listen, I mean it. I do. I know, I know how hard it is to see it when you believe the world’s out to get you, how you’re conditioned to think of yourself as less than you really are but-you’re my whole world you know?” his voice shook, softer than MC ever heard  him speak before. There was a profound gentleness there, a vulnerability they doubted he’d ever shown anyone before.

* He leaned back, allowing MC to see his small smile, the way his frows burrowed as he bit back tears in his bright eyes.

* He kissed MC, soft and quick before leaning back. “I know it’s cliche as fuck but-I just wish you could see yourself the way I look at you. You’re so damn amazing and I really thought I was no match to you-I could never for the life of me figure out why you decided to be with me.”

* MC opened their mouth, tried to argue that no, it eas the exact opossite. He was beautiful, brilliant, talented and so soft, a boy with so much love to give but no one to give it to-MC was honored to be on the receiving end of Seven’s love, and they wanted-no, needed him to know just that. But the moment they tried to speak, Seven put a finger to their lips, shushing them so he could continue.

* “I’m not gonna lie and say I don’t think this way sometimes still because yeah, I do. You know I do. But it’s not-I don’t think so all the time now, not anymore. Because of you. You showed me love when no one else would, and it made me think that maybe-just maybe, I might not be as shitty a person as I might think I am.”

* He shrugged, running a hand through his hair nervously. “I’m not saying that love fixes everything-you and I both know that’s not true” he said with a bitter smile, remembering the hardships, the years worth of fights and tears they both went through to reach this stage in their relationship, “but it helps. It really fucking helps, and I hope you’ll eventually come to realise it to.”

* He brought out his hand to you, extending his pinky. “I’m not asking you to change right away, I just-just promise me you’ll try alright? Maybe start with not rolling your eyes at compliments anymore. Promise?”

* And well, who can ever say no to those eyes? A pinky promise is a pinky promise. So you’ll try. You’ll try because, at the end of the day, love doesn’t fix everything-but it sure fucking helps.

((i hope you liked these! please remember you’re enough just as you are

-send me a headcanon/scenario for the mystic messenger character(s) to react to!-

#i tried posting this before and it wouldnt post i hope its ok this time #mystic messenger #mysme #mystic messenger prompts #mysme prompts #mystic messenger headcanon #mysme headcanons #Jihyun Kim #mysme V #Jumin Han #Luciel Choi #Saeyoung Choi #mysme 707 #mysme Zen #Hyun Ryu #Anonymous

[chelsfic]

Part Six - Wish You Weren’t Here - Diego Jiménez x Reader - Starz Power

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five

A/N: Here is some much needed smut. Along with some friendship fluff with Julio!

Warnings: Smut

Julio sends you a text when he gets to your building. You peer down through the sheer curtains of your living room window. The shiny, black Cadillac SUV sticks out like a sore thumb on your street. Your neighbors probably think you’re in witness protection or something. If they only knew the truth…

You send him thirty heart emojis in response. It’s been a week since Julio started driving you and you think you’ve managed to successfully weasel into his good graces. The key is to annoy him with friendship. A talent of yours, luckily.

You press a kiss to Pig’s head on your way out the door. 

“Bye, my baby!” you whisper into her calico fur. She blinks up at you and stretches out on the couch in luxury as you leave. 

It’s flurrying outside and now that you don’t have to walk in it you can appreciate how pretty the city looks under a fresh blanket of snow. You hop up into the passenger seat--literally hopping, you’re short and this vehicle is giant--and take pleasure in the heated leather seats. 

“Hey,” Julio greets you, handing you a cup of coffee.

You stare at it like he’s just handed you the Olympic torch. Then he gestures to the box on the center console and you squawk in joy.

“Julio! You got me coffee?? And...and--” you open the box--“Croissants! You went to The Usual Place? For me? I knew you liked me. Now we’re friends forever!”

Julio rolls his eyes and groans dramatically but you spot the tiniest indentation of his lips, the smallest hint of a smile. 

“Just don’t eat all the chocolate ones,” he grumbles.

You smile and warm your hands on the coffee cup as he pulls away from the curb. You’re really getting spoiled having him drive you to and from work every day. How will you be able to deal when you have to get yourself to the store to buy groceries this weekend? Unthinkable! You laugh a little under your breath. How quickly the snobbery becomes you.

Julio watches you from the corner of his eye and smiles sadly. He went out of his way this morning to make you happy. He’s still pissed at Diego. Julio has watched his boss pull you into passing kisses and embraces all week long. He doesn’t think anything else has happened yet--God knows Diego’ll let him know when it does. But he sees how you can’t stop smiling after Diego kisses you. And--despite his best efforts to remain aloof--you’ve somehow managed to make Julio like you. So he was pissed when his boss asked him to pick up Francesca and two of her friends last and bring them to the penthouse. He loves Diego but the boy can be stupid. And unintentionally cruel. He just prays you don’t find out. And he prays Diego isn’t stupid enough to continue his exhibitionist shit with you now that everything is...changing.

“Julio?” 

You startle him from his musings and he arches an eyebrow at you comically, watching you stuff the last bite of croissant into your mouth.

You take a sip of coffee to wash it down and continue, “Has...has Diego ever had a--girlfriend?”

Oh. God. You are thirteen years old. You’re starring in your own dumbass rom com Thirty Going On Thirteen. You slap your hand over your eyes so you don’t have to watch Julio’s face as he answers.

Julio clears his throat but he doesn’t succeed in covering the short laugh at your antics, “Diego? I’ve known him almost ten years. I’ve never seen him with a...girlfriend.”

You let your hand fall away from your eyes and look over at Julio earnestly, “So...he’s never had anything...serious?”

Julio turns to look at you as he stops the car at a red light. The pity in his eyes forces you to look away.

His voice is soft and you want to punch him. “His life just makes it...hard. You shouldn’t…”

His voice trails off. He wants to warn you. To help you. He likes you, damn it. You’re a little weirdo and it’s hilarious that his boss is so enthralled with you, but he knows Diego is going to hurt you. Still...it’s Diego. His boy. And he can’t bring himself to say something that would feel like a betrayal. You decide to save him.

“I know, Julio,” you offer him a fake smile. “Thanks.”

You do know. Really…

***

...It’s so easy to forget when Diego’s lips are trailing fiery kisses over your mouth, your jaw, the crook of your neck. You forget all the reasons this isn’t a good idea--all of Julio’s unspoken warnings. Your mind is given over to your body’s needs, overcome with the pulsing secret inside you, the yearning to ride Diego’s love into a blinding light that will doubtlessly eclipse all others. 

The mop clatters to the floor beside you and you launch yourself into Diego’s arms, forcing him to support you or buckle beneath the sudden attack. He perches you up on the kitchen counter, never letting his lips leave yours. If you had room to think you might marvel at how quickly this man has conquered your shyness, your reserve, your logic. 

He breaks the kiss to whisper into your ear, “Would it kill you to wear something with a little more...access?”

He grinds his hips against you for emphasis. Even through the denim fabric of your jeans you can feel the sweet bulge of his erection and you mewl in wanton need, pressing your mouth into his stubbled cheek to muffle the mortifying sound. 

“Sorry,” you huff, your breath shaky and short, “mini dresses with holes cut out the sides aren’t really p-practical…”

The words stutter to a stop when Diego’s fingers go to the waist of your pants, popping the button open and lowering the zipper. He shoves his huge hand inside, cupping your sex in his warm palm. All thoughts of Francesca and her ridiculous outfits fly from your head. You grind against him with a needy wail, burying your face into his shoulder in embarrassment as pleas fall from your lips. 

“Oh...my god, Diego. Please, please, please…” 

Diego smirks and lets his fingers drag through your folds, circling your mound with a feather-light touch that forces you to thrust your hips to gain any friction. You groan in frustration against his shoulder. He uses his free hand to grasp your ponytail, wrapping your hair around his fist and pulling it back until your upturned face is exposed to him. He eyes glint and he grins arrogantly as he increases the pressure against your clit, rolling the sensitive flesh between his fingers, all the while watching your face as you come undone. You’re sure you look pathetic--mouth hung open in lust, eyes dazed and half-lidded--you wish you could hide from his knowing gaze but when you try it, Diego tightens his grip on your hair and shakes his head slightly.

“I’m gonna watch you come on my fingers, guapa,” he hisses and laughs when the words evoke another lustful moan from you. “You like that, huh?”

He keeps his thumb rubbing relentlessly against your clit as his fingers dive down to plunge inside you, thrusting away into your wet cunt until you’re quivering around him and nearly sobbing with your coming orgasm.

You suddenly hear Julio clearing his throat from the elevator entrance and your body immediately tenses in alarm. Diego’s hand stills and you give the smallest cry of protest. Oh, god, you’re so close. But this--being watched--might be Diego’s thing... but it is definitely not yours. You lock eyes with him and you see the realization in his.

“Julio!” he growls, looking over his shoulder, “Turn around!”

Diego turns back to you. He releases his grip on your hair and lets you hide your face against his shoulder, cradling your head and ducking down to whisper, “Come for me, now.”

He starts up again, rubbing, circling and pulsing his hand against your wet sex. His movements are frenzied but expert and you’re crashing into your orgasm in seconds, swallowing your cry and clinging with your arms and legs wrapped around him like a baby koala. He rubs his hands over your back soothingly and ducks down to kiss you.

Julio pipes up apologetically, “Jefe...we have that thing…”

Diego lets out a ferocious growl and nips your lower lip sharply enough to make you gasp, “Ouch, Diego!”

His eyes go soft and molten and he kisses you gently to make up for it. He leans back and your arms fall away from his shoulders, you’re both out of breath and flushed. 

“Okay,” Diego grunts, running his hands through his hair. He’s already transforming before your eyes into the steely, dangerous version of himself that he wears out into the world. His eyes fall back to yours and soften a bit as he says, “We probably won’t be back until after you leave for the day...”

Quelle romantique. You’re sitting there, looking utterly debauched with your hair a mess and your pants undone, smelling of sex… Diego really has drawn you into something whether you like it or not. Julio’s unspoken warning lingers in your mind. There’s no room in Diego’s life for a serious relationship. If that’s true then you’ll just have to learn to accept it. But you don’t want what this is to be entirely on his terms--frenzied exchanges between murders and business meetings. You guess if you want something more you’re going to have to ask for it.

“Maybe--” your voice sounds high and squeaky in your ears-- “afterwards you can come by my place. I’ll order some Chinese food and…”

Diego looks up from tucking his gun into the waist of his pants. His face is a comical blank.

“Your place?” he repeats.

“Yeah…” you smile playfully, letting your hand brush up the length of his muscled arm and resting your palm against the back of his neck. You can see Julio’s guarded, worried expression from the corner of your eye but you ignore him. “My place.”

My rules.

Diego looks half intrigued, half reluctant. In the end all he’ll give you is, “Maybe. If we don’t get done too late.”

You try not to look too deflated, certain you’ll be spending another night alone. 

“Well...text me if you’re coming and I’ll order the food.”

Diego looks unnerved as he leaves the penthouse. Julio casts you an exasperated look and you shrug your shoulders with a grimace of apology. You don’t know what’s wrong with you either.

***

Walking home from the train station that afternoon you have to shake your head and laugh at yourself for reveling in the luxury of being driven around this morning. You’re still a poor girl even if your bank account is looking a little healthier lately and you may or may not have a millionaire drug lord coming over later for snuggles and...you know. A giggle erupts from your throat and an elderly lady passing by gives you a mean glance. Whatever...your life is so weird you might as well go with it.

As you’re skipping up the steps to your apartment something shiny a little down the street catches your eye. You glance over and do a double take. Dang--someone must’ve won the lottery. A gleaming, midnight blue muscle car is parked a few cars down from your building.

Well...good for them, you think and forget all about it.

A/N: Omg! Whose car is that?? It’s Tommy’s!

Tag List:

@lockedoutofmyotherblog @1zashreena1​ @lannister-slings-and-arrows @glowingpena​ @flower-petal-blooming​ @symbiont13​ @pullthedamnlever​ @sparrows-books​ @joalsglasses​ @ishqinbbc​ @pre-schoolervengance​ @skys-luce-stellare @popculturepriestess​ @nolongertwo​ @ughwhyareyoulikethist​ @squidlywiddly87​ @damndamer0n​ @xboxdudett​ @khicks3

#Diego Jiménez #Diego Jiménez x reader #Maurice Compte #Starz Power #Damnit Diego #chelsfic #smut

[lunarimagines]

OASIS [1]

Summary: When the world’s oceans start disappearing, everything is sent into chaos. You’re forced to either start moving towards the city center or perish. It almost feels hopeless... until you meet Kim Taehyung.

Warnings: language, future smut

A/N: I hope you enjoy the new series! Send me a message if you would like to be added to the taglist for this series :)

It was fucking hot.

Sweat dripped down your forehead and into your eyes and, god forbid, dripped off your nose in salty splashes against your lips and shirt. Kim Seokjin, your traveling partner, was faring no better. His white shirt was plastered to his broad back with sweat and the ends of hair dripping with sweat below his scarf covering. Both of you had wicked sunburns and tans, the effects of the extreme heat.

Four months ago the oceans had suddenly begun to dry up. The waves had disappeared, then the shoreline retreated the next day, and suddenly the ocean was collapsing in on itself. At first there had been fears of a tsunami but as the event appeared to happen to coasts worldwide, something else was very, very much wrong. Scientists had been stumped. How could such a massive body suddenly start to disappear? But there appeared to be no answer. The effects were devastating. The temperatures around the world began to rise, the rain and snow came less, humidity was practically unheard of. The forests were slowly receding. Concrete and asphalt were unbearably hot to stand on. Dehydration was common. The whole world was crumbling.

When scientists began to understand the phenomenon was not going to reverse itself, sand and dirt were poured over the concrete and asphalt in cities, cars were banned, and water was immediately rationed. The fear was lakes and rivers eventually drying up once the ocean water was gone. Terror was widespread.

When the whole world had seemed to collapse you had been an average university student studying abroad and living in an off-campus apartment with two other exchange students. When the news broke the apartment had cleared out as people rushed home - including your roommates - leading to higher airline prices and backed up flights for days, then months. You had stayed, rationing water from the grocery stores and packing instant food. Your next door neighbor (now travel buddy) Kim Seokjin had decided to stay in the apartment where he was safe from the overwhelmingly poor elements. The two of you had bonded through sharing resources and, as apartments began to be cut off to preserve energy and water, the two of you moved in together. By the time the whole apartment complex had run out of energy and the power and water shut off, the two of you had devised a plan to head inward toward the heart of the city rather than stay on the outskirts. Surely, surely, there was someone in the major city who could save you, offer an oasis.

But, God, it was hot as shit out here. Your throat was aching and scratchy from the dust. You didn’t dare to take another sip of your water.

“Let’s stop here for an hour,” Seokjin finally suggested as he rounded the corner on a concrete building. Though slightly dilapidated, the building didn’t look like it would fall down on your heads like some of the other structures in the city.

You agreed, following him through the hole in the wall where the door had once been. Inside it was stifling, the airflow nonexistent. You dropped your bag on the far wall away from direct sunlight and pulled your scarf off of your head, wringing the sweat out of it. Seokjin followed your lead, offering you half of his granola bar when he finally collapsed onto the floor next to you.

“Thanks,” you mumbled hoarsely. Then, after a bite, “How long do you think it will be until we reach the city center?”

Jin shrugged and sunk lower into the floor, closing his eyes and fanning himself softly. “I would guess about another day. I don’t think we’re that far, but this heat feels like it’s getting worse and we’re definitely going slower because of it. We have enough food and water left for two more days so let’s pray they have water in the city center.”

Your stomach flipped at his mention of resources. In reality, the two of you had enough water to last you another week, max. But in order to have water left in the event that the city held nothing, you had enough water rationed out for one more day. The thought of running out of water completely scared you. Your headache was already fierce from the slight dehydration you were facing. You didn’t even want to imagine what severe dehydration would feel like.

“I’ll set a timer for thirty minutes,” Seokjin said as he pulled out his battery-operated timer. It was the only electronic thing you had left besides your watch currently strapped to your wrist. Cell phones were long gone. “You can sleep first, then I will.”

It wasn’t necessarily that you feared an attack, but with water and food scarce and plenty of wild animals moving into the city because of the deforestation, it wasn’t impossible.

Settling in, you rested your head on your pack, adjusting the lumps in it to surround your head in a nice cradle. It didn’t take much before you were out cold, your body going limp as exhaustion pulled you into a deep sleep.

You knew you were tired when you had no dreams. By the time Seokjin was gently shaking you awake so you could take the watch as he slept it had felt like no time at all had passed. Standing up to shake the sleep off, you set the timer for thirty minutes. Wandering toward a window, you looked out the cracked, dusty glass at the surrounding buildings. Heat was shimmering off the bone-dry dirt and stone buildings. You rubbed dirt out of your eyes as you stared around, eyes watching for movement. You weren’t expecting any movement. At most, people had moved either to the countryside or, as you and Seokjin were trying to do, to the city.

You lost track of time by drawing designs into the dust on the glass lightly. Some of them were simple and some were more elaborate as you tried to recreate the landscape around you. The good thing was you needed no color; everything was in varying shades of beige and white. The sun and heat had all but bleached the buildings.

The ringing of the timer woke Seokjin with a start. He stretched lightly, his shirt lifting slightly to expose his hips. He had lost some of the muscle he’d had when you first met him simply from a lack of nutritious food and plenty of water, but he was still quite toned. You couldn’t help but notice that… While you couldn’t imagine anything romantic in this climate you were allowed to still look, right?

“I wish we still had cameras so I could tell you to take a picture,” Seokjin joked as he stood up.

“Please,” you answered with an eye roll, “I’m sure you’d love to take a picture of my ass to look at in times of struggle. That’s all you stare at when I lead.”

“Sue me.”

You smirked at the banter, slinging your pack over your shoulders and situating your scarf over your head again, knotting it under your chin firmly. Sliding your sunglasses on, you turned to Seokjin.

“Ready?”

“God, you look like such an old lady. Yes, babushka, I’m ready.”

“Enjoy your eyeballs burning, pretty boy,” you said, turning to lead the way out of the building and East toward the city.

“HEY! HEY!”

You and Seokjin whipped around to see two figures running toward the two of you. They were a good football field away from you, but closing in fast. Your heartrate sped up as you quickly glanced at Jin.

“Y/N, run,” Seokjin commanded sternly, gripping your elbow and taking off. You stumbled behind him, your mind malfunctioning at the sight of other people.

“In this weather? Are you fucking crazy!?” you huffed behind him, the dust from your steps going straight into your throat and lungs.

“You want to get mugged and lose all of our water and food or suffer a little bit of dehydration and heat exhaustion?”

“Shit,” you exclaimed, picking up your pace to overtake Seokjin and pull him behind you instead.

“Wait! WAIT!” the voices behind you called.

You focused on your feet hitting the ground, the gravel under your shoes feeling hot and rough. Seokjin’s presence beside you was calming. He seemed secure as his eyes were trained forward, trusting yours which were trained on the ground to help him avoid tripping. It wasn’t difficult. The ground was fairly undisturbed, not travelled on.

“Fuck, this heat,” Seokjin panted, his hand gripping your arm more tightly as the effects of fatigue began to take over. The two of you were not as strong as used to be. The extreme heat during the day, the odd coldness during the night, the lack of water and essential vitamins and nutrients were all taking a toll on you.

The lactic acid in your legs was making them heavy and feel as if they were on fire. Your lungs were filling up with less and less air with each breath. The only thing keeping the two of you going was adrenaline and the half hour of sleep you’d just gotten.

“They’re getting closer,” Seokjin huffed after a quick look over his shoulder. “How are they getting closer?”

“If you stopped talking you’d be able to save more air and run faster,” you puffed out, half-joking half-deadly serious.

“I’m gonna sacrifice you if you keep being petty,” he joked and you couldn’t help but laugh, a quick outburst, at his witty remark. It was times like these, potentially life-threatening, that you were glad Seokjin was the one you were stuck with. It made the days a lot less terrifying even though you could hear the footfalls of the two figures chasing you clearly now.

“Everything hurts-”

“Look… who’s talking… now,” Seokjin joked.

“-and they’re going to catch us anyways. I’ll spray them with my pepper spray if they try to attack us but I cannot run anymore, Jin, I’m sorry.”

“Oh thank GOD,” he stopped running suddenly and turned, his chest heaving and his cheeks pink. Sweat dripped down his nose and off of his hair as he stared at the two figures now only ten feet behind you. “I thought I was going to DIE.”

You laughed as you unhooked your pepper spray from your belt and flipped the tab to get ready to spray in case things turned sour. “If we do die, though, I need to be sappy first.”

Seokjin fake gagged but you could see the wry smile on his face as he stared down the figures. They were only five feet away now, their faces becoming increasingly clear as they came to a stop in front of you, panting. One placed his hands on his knees as he caught his breath, the other raising his hands above his head and groaning loudly.

“We called out to you… in the hopes… that… oh my, God I think I’m going to… to pass out… we called because we hoped we could work together to survive but I think… the two of you… are actually trying to kill ALL of us,” the shorter of the two spoke between breaths. The taller one laughed happily. It would almost sound crazed if you didn’t understand exactly how exhausted he was feeling.

“I mean this in the nicest way possible, but you two are the stupidest people I’ve ever seen,” Seokjin replied dryly.

The short boy stood up straight and you finally got to see his face. His jaw was set in defiance and his dark eyes stared underneath his hat at Seokjin with a certain intensity you hadn’t seen in a long time. They sparkled with a challenge and annoyance. His hands came up to rest on his hips and he chewed on his cheek as he continued to stare Seokjin down. “Oh?”

“What kind of dumbass yells at people during an apocalypse and then chases after them? Sure, we’re stupid for running, but at least we can say we did it to try and save our resources. You could have mugged us for all we knew!” Seokjin threw his hands up, his voice raising slightly. You shook your head and wiped sweat off of your forehead.

The boy’s friend laughed again, but it sounded sweeter this time. It was bright and felt comforting because there was no mirth behind it. Only pure happiness and amusement radiated from it. His eyes were bright and, although nearly the same colors as his friends, they seemed lighter with the amusement dancing in them. His cheeks were beautifully rounded when he smiled. You could feel yourself smiling just looking at him.

“He makes a good point, Yoongs,” the boy replied, smiling at his friend who, in return, seemed to relax. At the very least the tension was released from his shoulders. He cracked a smile at the taller one as he turned back toward you and Seokjin.

“We’ve been following you for about a day now, I think,” the taller one explained. “We aren’t asking that you share any of your resources, but we are asking if you would be willing to let us join you as we go toward the city center. I don’t know how much safer it will be, but it feels like it should be safer in a group of four rather than a group of two. I heard there’s a lot of people going to the city center anyway, so more people in the group really does seem safer.”

Seokjin glanced at you and you shrugged your shoulders. He made sense, and if there really were more people going to the city center than you anticipated the extra numbers would be much safer. The thing about large groups of people in hysteria was that violence and deceit always seemed to follow. Plus, the boys had made it clear they didn’t intend to take resources… although the jury was still out on that one. You would be sure to keep all of your belongings close to you when you slept and kept watch tonight.

Stealing a peek at Seokjin you could tell he was still ruminating. The two of you didn’t have much time if you wanted to reach the city center by tomorrow during the daylight hours. It wasn’t an option to reach the center at nightfall when the city was cloaked with a deep blackness that made it nearly impossible to see.

“Fine, but you either have to lead or walk beside us,” Seokjin finally decided for the both of you. You nodded at his decree. The boys also nodded and the four of you turned in a large circle so the boys were in front of you. The taller of the two nodded at you before turning on his heel and starting forward, sticking close the shade of the buildings as he went. His friend followed somewhat reluctantly, but fell in line quickly. You and Seokjin opted to walk side-by-side, your arms brushing lightly as you bent your heads together to talk.

“We don’t even know their names… are we stupid for doing this?” you mumbled. Your voice could barely be heard above the crunch of the gravel underneath your feet.

“Is it too late to ask their names? I feel like it’s weird. They’re just nice one and slightly less nice one to me…” he joked back

“No, it absolutely feels too late to ask. I think we just don’t refer to them by anything other than ‘hey’.”

Seokjin snorted at your comment before straightening up again. His eyes were trained slightly ahead of the two boys on the increasingly tall buildings coming into sight. It felt like an oasis in the desert, which truly wasn’t far off. You sent a prayer to the universe that the solution to your problems would be found in the city because you didn’t want to think about dying yet. You were simply too young and beautiful to die.

Honestly, you weren’t sure what kind of oasis you were hoping to find. Sure, you were hoping to find water and food, but beyond that you weren’t quite certain. Maybe you were looking for a group you and Seokjin could dissolve into so that you wouldn’t have to fend for yourselves anymore. You were so, so tired of having to fight your way through every single day in order to survive and make yourself continue to move, your feet continue to pound against the hot soil and sand, make your lungs continue to fill with air and then expel it. A moment of rest with people who understood your struggle and wouldn’t try to hurt you. Plus, you knew Jin was exhausted. He had dark circles under his eyes and his usually soft and highly groomed hair was crusted with dirt and despair. He took smaller strides each hour it seemed.

But he had never given up. He’d kept cracking jokes with you and making sure you had a shoulder to lean on, sometimes physically rather than metaphorically. You’d fallen asleep on his shoulder every single night since you’d left the apartment. It wasn’t just fatigue. It was wanting to make sure he was real, he was really there. There had been moments you weren’t even sure you existed. You faced an unbelievable heartache cut off from your previous life.

A few hours later, the sun was beginning to set. The boys in front of you slowed their pace as they began searching for a good building to spend the night in. They settled on a small brick house that had been abandoned based on the fact that the shorter boy had called out “HELLO” and nobody had answered. You liked that the door locked, but you were skeptical of why the house seemed to be in such good condition.

“I think here’s good.” The taller boy dropped his pack on the dusty couch, a plume of sand and dust coming off of it from the weight. He wiped a spot haphazardly before plopping down, spreading his legs and draping his arms across the back of the couch. “Take first watch?”

The other boy nodded as he dropped his pack beside his friend’s on the couch. He took a small sip from his water bottle before tightening the lid and slipping it back in his pack securely.

“You want to sleep first?” Seokjin leaned down to whisper, his lips brushing your ear slightly. He blew into your ear lightly just to piss you off before straightening up.

“You can sleep first. I slept first this afternoon.”

Seokjin nodded and went into the second room to find another couch in pristine condition. You followed behind him, suddenly uncomfortable to be alone with the two boys. You still didn’t know their names.

You sat down with your back against the couch as Seokjin spread across it. His hand came down almost automatically to run over your hair lightly. He traced shapes on the back of your neck as you stared down at your watch. You could barely see the time in the dim dusk lighting, but you read the time: 6:45.

“Do you want to eat now?” you asked quietly as you rummaged in your backpack for a protein bar. You would make breakfast with some of your instant noodles in the morning.

“Hmmm… can I have a bite of yours?” Seokjin asked, opening his mouth.

You rolled your eyes but allowed him to take a bite.

“Tastes like shit.”

You snorted. The protein was truly the star of the granola bar. It was bitter and made your mouth feel grainy, but it offered enough energy to keep you going. But yeah, it tasted like shit.

Leaning your head back, you peered up at Seokjin as he shifted onto his side to look at you. “Do you think we’re safe?”

Seokjin let out a deep sigh. His shoulders were slumped and his eyes were drooping as he tried to focus on you.

“I really hope we are. If you don’t feel safe tonight wake me up. I’ll wake you up if I don’t feel safe, too. Keep your pepper spray open.”

You nodded as you settled back to stare at the wall. Soon, the soft sounds of Seokjin snoring filled your ears. His slightly parted lips led out a puff of air onto your head each time he exhaled, providing the only breeze you had felt in ages. The air was still hot around you, the sand still warm. You knew it would cool down soon, though. The land always lost the heat sooner than water had, letting a slight reprieve seep in.

After a while, you stood up to stretch your aching legs. Your knees popped. Glancing at Seokjin, you wandered to the doorway where the smaller boy was leaning, staring out the window toward the city.

“How long have the two of you been together?” he whispered once you’d settled against the doorframe.

You let out a splutter, not expecting him to be so blunt. “Well, I mean… we’ve been living together for about three months and traveling together. But we certainly aren’t dating.”

“I get that,” the boy replied, “because it’s nice to have companionship, even if it’s not romantic. I feel pretty alone out here. I never realized how dark the world was without light pollution. Even camping you know there’s still light in the cities. Now? Not so much.”

The way he spoke had you nodding slowly as you took in his words. He was extremely well spoken. It almost surprised you but not quite. The way he carried himself had clued you in earlier that he was an astute person.

“How long have the two of you been together?”

He seemed to have to think for a minute before answering.

“We’ve been friends for about ten years, I think, and it just seemed natural that we go together…”

You nodded as he trailed off, staring back into the pure darkness. You could barely make out his frame in the gloom.

“What do you think we’ll find in the city?” you finally asked after the silence seemed to encompass the both of you, suffocating in the darkness.

You could hear him sigh and shuffle so he was leaning on the doorframe opposite you. “Honestly? I’m not sure. I think it’s ridiculous to think we’ll find anything functioning but I think I’m still kind of holding out hope that we find a functioning community. Like in a dome, you know? Which feels stupid now that I’m saying that out loud.”

“I don’t think it’s stupid,” you interjected quickly, “or if it is we must both be idiots because I think that’s kind of what I’m hoping for. I haven’t heard anything about how much longer we’ll have the oceans, but I hope somebody can figure out something quick.”

“One and a half months.”

“What?” you questioned, your eyebrows knitting.

“One and a half months until the oceans are completely gone. Then I think we only have a few weeks left to survive. The heat will wipe us out first, I think. If not that then lack of water. If not that, then lack of food. Not to be morbid.”

Ending a sentence with “not to be morbid” never makes it less morbid, especially when the future appeared especially bleak now. You let out a harsh breath and rubbed your eyes roughly.

“Can’t believe there might actually be a day I miss eating these protein bars,” you joked lightly and you heard the boy snort before he began laughing quietly. You could tell he was stifling the sound behind his hand.

“No, last week I had one that was lemon. I was like damn, can’t go wrong with lemon. It felt like I was eating lemon-infused dirt. Literally could have scooped up the dirt from the ground and eaten it.”

You let out a light cackle at that, immediately slapping your hand over your mouth to muffle the sound. The boy was snickering.

“It might have expired. I have no idea what today is, to be fair.”

“Amen.”

The two of you spent the rest of your time in comfortable silence. You could only hear the soft snoring of the two sleeping boys and the light breathing of the other across the door frame. The temperature was finally bearable and you could feel yourself relaxing and cooling down as the sweat drenching your shirt cooled. You knew you would be chilly for the same reason soon. But for now you simply basked in the slightly cooler temperature.

The soft rustling behind you a few hours later let you know Seokjin was up. He gently grazed your arm as you turned to look at him. His hair was pushed up to one side with, a sight you could barely make out in the complete darkness. The only reason you could see anything was from the full moon and the stars outside the window. You reached up to smooth his hair down lightly, the coarse strands caked with dirt and sweat. You didn’t mind. He’d done the same for you before.

“You still have another hour if you want to sleep,” you mumbled quietly as you smoothed his hair. He’d bent down slightly to give you a better angle.

“It’s okay. I woke up naturally so I think that’s my body’s way of saying it’s time for me to get up.”

You smoothed the last strand and patted his head affectionately before he straightened up.

“If you’re sure…”

“I’m sure. Go sleep,” he said with a gentle push toward the couch.

You couldn’t really complain anymore. Your body went to the couch on autopilot, spreading across it with your head on your backpack before immediately passing out. Your body relaxed finally for the first time in hours, and not only did you sleep well, but you even had it in you to dream.

They weren’t serious dreams. Most of them had to do with your life before the apocalypse. Spending time with the people you loved in your hometown. It felt like a fever dream. You felt like you were looking at yourself from the outside rather than living it. You weren’t that Y/N anymore in some ways. You held the same name but you weren’t sure you spoke the same, looked the same, or thought the same. However, the dreams were happy ones and by the time Seokjin was shaking you gently awake you found yourself feeling content and refreshed, though perhaps also slightly nostalgic.

“Let’s have breakfast before we start again. I think we should get there by late afternoon,” Seokjin said as he rummaged through his backpack for food and water.

You sat up and rubbed your eyes. Cheers to another day, you supposed.

“Ahh, I love the taste of incredibly chewy, salty noodles in the morning,” the taller of the two new boys said as he sat down across from you, his friend following behind.

“Be grateful you have food at all, Hobi,” the shorter one grumbled, tearing open his own packet of noodles.

Yoongs and Hobi. You were guessing those were nicknames. Cute.

Your group of four ate silently. You couldn’t really talk much as you tried to chew through the undercooked ramen noodles and forget how salty they were. They certainly wouldn’t help with your dehydration but when they were the only things left to eat that offered more than 190 calories you couldn’t truly complain. Besides, the more you ate them the more you forgot how they should actually taste. At this point these noodles were becoming a delicacy, albeit a chewy one.

“I think we’ll make it to the city by mid-afternoon maybe,” Yoongs said, as he finished his breakfast and placed his wrapper in the dusty trashcan standing in the corner of a room that looked like the kitchen. His actions amused you, but you found yourself following suit out of habit. Refraining from littering a wasteland… ironic.

“Let’s get going then,” Hobi said, slinging his pack over his shoulder and securing his hat on his head.

You decided to pour a dash of water over your scarf before you tied it to your head as you felt the heat permeating every inch of the air. It would be a small sacrifice to help ward off the heat fatigue.

The blisters on your feet were raging today as you began walking beside Jin, following the two boys from shadow to shadow. The buildings seemed to grow taller with each step. Their windowpanes were increasingly busted which worried you. The climate was not different enough on the outskirts of the city from the city center to cause such breakage. The only explanations were riots or violence. You weren’t sure how effective your pepper spray would be against a large group of people.

Your eyes scanned the building windows and, beside you, Jin kept glancing over his shoulder. It hadn’t been more than a few hours before Hobi was abruptly stopping.

“Wait,” Hobi said quietly, holding up his hand to signal to you and Jin to stop. “I don’t know if I’m just being paranoid… but I feel like we’re being watched.”

Goosebumps broke out on your arms and head as you understood what he was saying. You felt like you were being scrutinized. Yet, you hadn’t been able to see anything or anyone in buildings or out in the open. Still, the fact that you were so close to the center of a major city and there had been no people other than the two boys in front of you was suspicious.

You unclipped your pepper spray and twisted the tab open. Beside you, Seokjin unsheathed the small knife he kept strapped to his muscular thigh. His eyes were scanning in front of you as he backed you and himself against the wall of the nearest building. Your pack dug into your back and hips as you got as close to the wall as possible to protect it. Yoongs jammed in beside you and Hobi jammed in on his other side. You waited with bated breath. The air seemed even more stifling.

“Oh my, God! Can you just come out so we can get this over with!” Yoongs suddenly called out, rolling his eyes in annoyance. Despite his confident call you could feel how tense he was.

Figures cloaked in various shade of brown appeared from the buildings surrounding you. Your breath caught as you watched person after person step out. There were at least twenty of them surrounding you before one stepped forward. You couldn’t see their face beneath the hood, but anyone who was so rude had to be absolutely fucking ugly, you thought.

“Holy shit,” Jin whispered, his hand clenching around his knife. His knife began to look comically small amongst the crowd. “How much pepper spray do you have in that thing?”

“Never had to use it before. If I’m careful I can probably get half of them.”

Nobody else spoke. The heat shimmered off the ground and the buildings swam. You wished someone, anyone, in that group would talk. Finally, the one who had stepped forward did.

“How much water do you have?”

It was a woman’s voice. Her voice was gruff, the sound of gravel rolling around a metal tube almost. It made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

“None,” Yoongs bluffed. “Why else would we be heading toward the city center.”

You could feel Jin holding his breath beside you, waiting to see if the group bought the lie. They seemed to grumbled slightly, shifting from one foot to another as they waited for their leader’s decision. She seemed to contemplate it.

“See, why don’t I believe you?”

“You have trust issues?” Seokjin asked, and Hobi snorted from the other side of Yoongs. You sucked in your cheeks to stop yourself from smiling. Even if you were going to die you’d all go out acting petty.

“You think you’re funny-”

“I know I’m funny.”

“-but I still think you all have water. Since you were so rude to us I think we’ll have to take all of it. We were thinking of saving you some-”

“Bullshit,” Yoongs mumbled.

“-but I’m not feeling very kind now. You can either give us your water or we can take it by force. If we have to take it by force I’m not sure we’ll leave your food with you either.”

You couldn’t even be mad about Jin possibly ruining your chances of escaping with your food. His humor and wit were needed against their rudeness. Seriously, who did these people think they were?

Your hand holding the pepper spray twitched as the group moved closer to box you in. You couldn’t see their eyes well enough to aim and you didn’t want to waste your pepper spray, the only thing you had to defend yourself besides the boys on either side of you.

“Water. Now.”

The four of you stayed still, jaws clenched in defiance. Your hands were clammy as you waited. What you were waiting for you weren’t sure. Maybe someone to save you. Maybe heat exhaustion to strike you down. Maybe someone else in your small group to step forward first.

Thankfully a fourth option was presented to you in the form of a man’s voice coming from a window above you in the building you were currently pressed flush against.

“This is so boring will someone please just do something.”

His voice was so deep that it caused shiver to run through you. You took a chance to crane your neck up to see the arms of a man draped over the window as he leaned out casually to watch the scene unfold. He tapped his fingers against the brick impatiently.

“Stay out of this, Namjoon,” the girl called back, flipping him off.

Yoongs snorted beside you at the childish gesture and for just a second the situation seemed less terrifying. You felt a surge of relief course through you because at least there were other people here who maybe weren’t friendly but were also not foes.

The sound of a body dropping out of the window closest to Hobi startled you as the light thump and resulting rise of dust seemed to cut through the tension. Another body dropped down in front of you, landing gracefully on his feet, his hand touching the ground to stabilize himself. He stood, dusting off his hands. The flash of tattoos on his hand caught your attention as you found yourself almost entirely mesmerized by his hands as he reached to unsheathe a knife strapped to his hip.

“You must be scared if you’re sending your guard dogs down,” the girl called up, but she and her group had retreated back a few steps.

“If I was doing that Taehyung would also be down there. As it stands now, I’m not too concerned. This group seems like they could give you a run for your money. I’m sure pepper spray to the eyes in this dry heat would hurt like a bitch,” the man, Namjoon, called back. Your hand gripped the pepper spray tighter as you noticed the boy in front of you turning back to take a glance at the pink container clasped in your hand. His hair flopped roughly into his eyes as he looked up at you and grinned, his cheeks growing round and his shoulders relaxing.

“We just need water, Namjoon. Are you going to give that to us or do we have to take it?”

Namjoon seemed to think that over for a second. He hummed.

“What can we get in return if we give you water?” The girl seemed taken aback at his question.

“What do you want?” she questioned slowly.

“Jimin! What do we want?” Namjoon called.

The boy beside Hobi straightened up and put his forefinger to his lips, pretending to think. He tapped his plump lips lightly before smiling.

“I happened to hear you have painkillers you’re hoarding. Those are quite the delicacy… I think those would be a sufficient trade for some life saving water. What do you think, Jungkook?” The boy in front of you cocked his head to one side as he also pretended to think. “Seems like a pretty fair trade to me.”

“You heard my boys! Bring back the painkillers and we’ll give you even more water than you could possibly get from this group. I would suggest you hurry. I think my deal will expire by midnight.”

The girl turned to look at her comrades who nodded under their beige garments. She turned to flip Namjoon off once more before turning back to her group and dissolving back into the buildings around you, the plumes of dust from their feet the only indication they were moving from shadow to shadow. Your group stood there watching them, almost in a sense of awe and wonder, as Jungkook and Jimin walked back toward the door leading into the building.

“You all going to stand there until the oceans come back or are you going to come in?” Namjoon asked from above, his voice tinged with amusement.

The question stirred you from your daze and you turned in a uniform line to follow Yoongs and Hobi toward the door, slipping your pepper spray closed and clipping it back onto your belt as your feet shuffled forward. Jin grabbed your elbow lightly and leaned down to whisper, “Stay close.. I’m not sure I trust them yet.”

You could only nod as you were met by Yoongs and Hobi halting. Jimin was leaning against the doorframe, his leg sprawled out to block the entrance.

“What’s the password?”

Yoongs huffed in annoyance. “You’ve got to be shitting me.”

“I am, in fact, not shitting you. What’s. The. Password?”

“I’m gonna knock your pretty little teeth out?” Yoongs grumbled and Hobi snorted.

“Thank you,” you sighed to Jimin, craning your neck around to look him in the eye. His eyes shone with amusement and even glee at your answer.

He grinned as he stepped aside. “Bingo.”

“My next guess,” Yoongs shrugged. You shook your head at him. Even though you’d only met the boy about a day ago you had to admit you kinda liked him. He sometimes had a blunt way of speaking but he was also funny and charming and intelligent.

You followed the boys in to find the building had been almost completely gutted. The upper floors wrapped around the edges to leave an open center that looked up to a chandelier filled with candles. Their lights flickered dimly against the square brick ceiling. Faces peered over the edges of the railings and out of rooms. It reminded you of a fancy hotel. You had grabbed Jin’s wrist, earning a look from Jungkook that he shared with Jimin from behind you, as you took in the building. This was your oasis. This.

“Welcome to your new home,” Namjoon said as he stepped off of the last step on a staircase tucked behind a wall. “You’ll always be welcome here as long as you pull your weight.”

“What the hell is this place?” Hobi asked, his eyes wide and his mouth parted slightly as he watched people move.

“Um. I mean. We don’t really have a name,” Namjoon replied awkwardly, his eyebrows crinkling. “We’re not that lame I don’t think.”

Yoongs let out a laugh at that and truly smiled for the first time since you’d met him. It was a cute, gummy smile that had you smiling, too.

“Taehyung!” Namjoon called, cupping his hands around his mouth. “Sorry. Taehyung’s like our unofficial tour guide and, apparently, one of our guard dogs.”

Jungkook snickered behind you and Jimin stifled a laugh.

Jin nudged your thigh with his hand and gave you a pointed look that said, “Do we stay?”

You shrugged your shoulders and shook your head to say, “I have no fucking clue.”

His question was answered when you saw Taehyung, however. His shaggy hair brushed the top of his eyelashes, his dark eyes filled with a warmth and kindness that made your chest feel light. His tanned arms were crossed over his chest as he regarded your small group, his eyes landing on you. He smiled softly and you nearly choked at how gorgeous it was. His deep chuckle had butterflies in your stomach. This boy was affecting your whole body already. You were drawn to him. You wanted him.

“Hi,” he greeted. “I’m Taehyung.”

#bts reactions #bts scenarios #bts smut #taehyung reactions #taehyung scenarios #taehyung smut #kpop reactions #kpop scenarios #kpop smut #bts #kpop #taehyung #oasis m.list #sorry for reposting! #myimagines

[himbowelsh]

You can totally ignore this if you want but I could I request some sad headcanons about the guys. Like how they deal with ptsd or insecurities or traumatic childhood incidents.

Richard Winters

dick isn’t emotionally open in general.  he keeps things in.  that’s how he was raised, how he’s grown up, and the only way he really knows how to cope with things.  talking about his feelings...  is uncomfortable.

that said, he processes them well.  dick doesn’t let negative emotions fester.  he finds releases for them, either through doing things he enjoys or spending time around his loved ones.  he’s not the sort of person to linger on things.

will definitely overwork himself when his mind is in a troubled place.   being productive helps him so much.  focusing on things he can control, things that need to get done...  sure, he’s going to bed at 3am, but it’s not because he’s upset, it’s because he was working.

doesn’t...  like being alone when things are on his mind.  it’s too easy to get sucked in, for those loud thoughts to drown everything else out.  being around other people...  not sharing, but just not being alone...  it helps.

Lewis Nixon

*summon the folger’s theme song*  the best part of waking up...  is an obscene amount of high-shelf liquor in your cup!!

hey, it’s nine o’clock...  in the morning.

literally.  nix is of the opinion that if you can’t drink the bad thoughts away, then they’re not worth thinking at all.  the thing is, his brain summons them anyways, because brains are awful like that.

he’s got a lot of trauma!!  so much trauma!!  his childhood was miserable, his family’s the worst, he feels like a disappointment and has no desire to try to prove himself to parents whose love was questionable from the day he was born...

lots of insecurities too.  can you tell?

he won’t talk about any of it unless he’s really, really drunk, with someone he counts among his closest friends.  then sometimes the negativity just rushes out.  he can’t help it, and it gets ugly.

otherwise, he broods, he holds it all in, and he drinks.  would he benefit from therapy?  yes, absolutely, but alcoholism tastes so much better.

Carwood Lipton

this is a healthy man right here

he copes with things.  lip has interests, outlets he can channel his frustrations into, and the ability to rationalize things internally and get them off his chest.  most things don’t weigh on him for long, because he’s got those sweet coping skills.

this isn’t even angsty.  he doesn’t have a lot of emotional angst.  he works through things, mostly by processing them on his own  ---  but if something’s really weighing on him, lip will turn to his most trusted person  (his mother gives great advice)  for an outlet.

Ron Speirs

heh heh.  ohhhh boy.

he’s...  he’s speirs, okay.  he’s not gonna open up and talk about what’s bothering him, because that’s his business, and no one else needs to know.

ron...  gets impulsive.  reckless.  places less regard on his own life.  he’ll do obscenely risky things because he’s kind of an adrenaline junkie; that burst of danger actually helps him cope with what’s bothering him.  at least, it gives him a good reason to keep going.

he retreats into himself when it comes to anything emotional.   broods a little, but if anyone asks what’s on his mind, he won’t say a word. 

“well, we’re all on a steady march towards death anyways, does anything really matter?  no.  i’m already dead so nothing has any consequences.  yeet.”

jesus christ, get this man some therapy.

Harry Welsh

talks it out.  literally, he’s just... gonna share things.  he’ll literally just do that.

harry sometimes can be an oversharer, but he never really learned to put a filter on his emotions.  it helps that he’s sort of the “water off a duck’s back” type of person; he doesn’t take a lot of things personally, so when he does need to rant about something, it’s usually big.  he turns to his loved ones, because he trusts them, and usually they can help.

but it is kind of weird for guys like nixon and winters, whose life mottos are “i’ll keep all of my emotions right here and then someday i’ll die”, to hear harry be like  “I’M UPSET TODAY AND HERE’S WHY”.  like...  he really doesn’t care who knows what’s going on in his soul, huh?  he’s really able to open up like that.

(harry is the most emotionally healthy man here, good for him)

Buck Compton

it’s called impostor syndrome, and buck has it.

he’s a confident guy, but under the surface, has insecurity in spades  ---  he feels like he has a lot to live up to, and doesn’t believe he’s doing everything well enough.  he’s supposed to be exceptional, and that’s a heavy burden to bear.  there’ll be a part of him that’s always going to feel like he’s not good enough.

like...  he seriously doesn’t know quite where to begin when processing negative emotions, because he feels like he should be able to deal with them himself.  his first instinct isn’t to talk it out, or seek out positive outlets; he keeps it all inside because he feels he can handle it.

don’t get me wrong, buck handles things well  ---  he’s resilient.   but every so often, the emotions just get so overwhelming, and boil up like a toxic spill inside of him; it can get overwhelming.  

Eugene Roe

conceal don’t feel buddy

look, gene...  never acquired coping skills growing up.  it wasn’t anyone’s first priority, and he had too many sisters monopolizing his mother’s time.  as a kid, gene had genuine anger issues, and would get into trouble often, because he just...  didn’t know how to deal with what he was feeling.

his grandmother was the one who stepped in and taught him how to pray.  that’s the closest thing gene has to comfort; he is quietly devout, and turns to god in his darkest moments when desperate for some guidance.  if he can’t talk to anyone else about what he’s feeling  ---  and he usually prefers not to  ---  he can speak freely to god.

but god can’t help him shoulder his burdens.  genuinely, gene just needs to learn to open up and share. keeping everything bottled up...  is not good for him.

George Luz

laugh the pain away, until you no longer can.

people assume george luz processes his emotions in a healthy way.  these people are incorrect.  his “fake it til you make it approach” isn’t the worst, but 9/10 therapists would not recommend.   (the 10th is luz, doing his best impression of a therapist.)

he laughs things off. it’s easier than to do that than to let people in.  george hates burdening others with his feelings.  he’s got a natural talent for keeping peoples’ spirits up, so bringing them down with him is...  a frightening idea.  it feels like failure.

for the most part, george is good at keeping things in and processing them internally.  if something’s really bothering him, people close can tell  ---  he hardly smiles, and his jokes aren’t as funny as they are dark  ---  but he’s usually able to recover without any help.  he’s good at dealing with things on his own.

he tries not to drink too much, because if he gets really really drunk, he loses his grip.  then it can all come spilling out, in a big messy wave of feelings, and he’d prefer to avoid that at all costs.

oh gosh, there’s this amazing fic that actually centers around babe and roe dealing with their problems, but there’s this one scene with luz, and it breaks me

Joe Toye

in a word?  not well.

joe dealing with things...  is not a pretty picture.  he prefers to not deal with things, to be honest, because it’s easier to pretend all the emotional shit doesn’t exist and just push it down until he can’t feel it anymore.  sometimes it even works.

truth is, joe has a lot of insecurities, and really struggles to deal with them.  they plague him]...  and while he can channel some of it into anger  (there’s a reason my modern!toye takes up kickboxing)  a lot of it just gets sent straight to depression central.

it’s not something he talks about easily, either.   he wasn’t raised in an environment that encouraged men talking about their feelings; joe comes from a tough irish family where everyone, especially the men, are supposed to keep a stern face and power through.  he’s only able to opens up to a few trusted people   (malarkey, maybe guarnere, maybe luz).  when the emotions reach a boiling point...  they don’t have anywhere to go.  they feel like they’re going to consume him.

he’s contemplated some dark things before, and it’s not something he’s proud of.

Bill Guarnere

what the hell is this man even made of???

bill takes all his negative emotions and converts them into fuel.    every tear his body forces him to shed adds an extra year to his life.

he’s incredibly resilient, and can power through pretty much anything.  losing his leg didn’t take him out for long; sure, it was a blow, but he bounced back from it as strong as ever.  losing his brother was agonizing  (worse than the leg, honestly)  and it made bill furious  ---  but that fury kept him going, and kept him alive.   he reacts to grief by turning it into anger, and once that anger dulls it’s just raw energy keeping him moving.

bill copes by being around people.  honestly  ---  just put him in a room with his best friends and his problems gradually fade out.   it’s not like he bares his soul to them; he just needs to be around friends, enjoying life. their presence helps him work through things better than any therapist.

(peak extrovert energy omg)

Babe Heffron

just like bill, babe also recovers by being around his favorite people.

he draws energy from them; it’s like he’s low on cash, so he asks his buddies for a few dollars, but in this case it’s emotional stability.  babe just copes better around other people.

left alone with his own thoughts...  things can get messy.

this man doesn’t do well with being alone in general  ---  he feels isolated, almost forgotten, and will seek out the nearest person just to chase those dark feelings away.  when babe’s struggling with something, he also struggles with how to deal with it.   the emotions are like a pot bubbling over inside of him, and he’s fighting to make sense of them all.  he can’t do that alone.

he has to express himself to someone.  ideally someone he trusts, but it might just end up being whoever’s available, or whoever’s nearby.  his dark emotions are very potent, and very painful; it takes a while for him to be free of them completely, but having someone else help make sense of them  (or just offer reassurance)  helps.

he’s a crier.  he’s not proud of it, but when babe’s really at his brink, he cries.  it’s an ugly sight.

Shifty Powers

just freaking...  goes off into the wilderness.

no, literally.  shifty needs some quiet time.  when he’s struggling, he’ll take his gun, take his car, and vanish for a while.   (that sounds...  worse than it is.  shifty’s not the kind of person to consider hurting himself.)    he just disappears into the woods.   

the longest he’s ever been gone was two whole days...  but he always returns with a clear head, willing to talk things out.

Joe Liebgott

he just...  straight up doesn’t, man.  he doesn’t deal with shit.  he pushes it aside, forces it back  ---  it’s not exactly repression, because the Bad Stuff is always there on the outskirts of his mind at all times, lieb just actively chooses not to deal with it.

(he’ll pick any fight except the ones in his own head.)

you’ve got to understand, he’s had his share of trauma.  he didn’t have an easy go of it before the war, and definitely not during.  liebgott collects emotional baggage like baseball cards, and at this point he’s got a full set.

if he can run from the emotions, he will.  this leads him to self-isolate, cutting himself off from the people who might be able to help; he doesn’t want to share all the negative emotions, because he doesn’t know how.  at his worst, he also tends to lash out, and...  other people don’t have to deal with that, okay?

joe will put off dealing with things for as long as possible, and never truly deal with them at all.

David Kenyon Webster

writing is literally his therapy.  putting his emotions down on paper helps.  formulating them into words is like a release, and having them laid out in front of him, where he can analyze it all lets him look at the problem objectively.  webster writes just to get things out...  sometimes because he can’t bear to hold it all inside any longer.

he also loves sailing, partly because of how freeing it is to be out on the open water.  he’s completely in control of his boat, and can go anywhere, anywhere in the world  ---  if he wanted, he could leave everything behind.  the notion is tantalizing.

webster really isn’t open about his negative feelings with others.  when it’s something personal...  it takes a lot for him to open up, and he’d have to trust that person implicitly.  a part of him feels that baring his emotions is just an invitation to be mocked, so he’s hesitant.

at least he processes them.  he’s not tormented by things, because he’s got his releases  ---  writing, and sailing.  if the mind is a prison, they set him free.

Donald Malarkey

catch malarkey right there in that kickboxing class with joe toye

look.  don feels things deeply, and takes things personally.  he can’t help it.  he doesn’t let go of things; if he’s been hurt badly, it’s an open wound on his soul forever, and it never heals.

he’s never a wreck.  like, he’s perfectly able to function, and has a unique ability to power through even in the darkest moments...  but those shadows are always there, and they weigh on him.  they smother him.   he can never really escape.

tends to avoid the topics which hurt him; when they come up, he can get testy  ---  or worse, teary!!  ---   and that’s not something he wants to burden anyone else with.     his greatest hurts are very private things to him, and he doesn’t want the people he cares about affected by them.

Skip Muck

skip channels his bad feelings into energy, and that energy needs to find its way out.

he’ll play guitar and sing along really aggressively.  he’ll deep-clean the entire house.  he’ll run just to feel the burn in his lungs, the ache in his limbs, until he’s too worn out to feel anything but exhaustion.

honestly, he gets a little manic when something’s bothering him.   he needs to chill.

skip is...  more willing than most to talk things out, so long as he has someone he trusts.   it’s not too hard for him to open up, he just needs to be able to open up to the right people.  his sister is a frequent confidant, as are malarkey and penkala.   skip doesn’t like many people seeing the darker side of him, but being able to talk about his feelings helps immensely.

Ralph Spina

genuinely... doesn’t have any baggage.

no childhood trauma.  no agonizing breakup story or betrayals.  no emotional damage whatsoever.  and when something is bothering him, his instinct is to just talk it out, and then it’s done. this man sleeps like a baby.

it’s freaky.

#eat up that sweet sweet emotional trauma #band of brothers #headcanons #tw depression #tw self-harm

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Ice Queen sister; Peter Parker x twin sis reader

*Author’s note*

OKay so I’m gonna stop messing around and move some more stories that I have on my wattpad account onto here. I promised you all that I would move some more Peter Parker fanfics I had but I was either too busy or lazy to do so, but in light of the quarantine, I’m finally getting off my lazy ass to finally move them to here so that you all could see them. This was written god I wanna say 2 years ago so here are some serious warnings here:

Warnings: murder (Uncle Ben’s death), HINTS OF SEXUAL ASSAULT/RAPE (NO DETAILS BUT MENTIONS OF IT. If it makes you uncomfortable, just be warned but like I said there’s no scene of it being done, just mentioned), violence, and a stab at the police system.

I hope you all enjoy this fic and I promise the next Peter Parker fic I’ve got for you guys will be fluffier than this one.

Taglist:

@waddles03​

@psychosupernatural​

@plethora-of-things​

@ixchel-9275​

@platawnic​

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels​

_______________________________________________________

Spiderman was holding a girl in his arms, unfortunately the girl was bleeding immensely from her side and he refused to let her go even once. But he had an even bigger problem since the criminal before them now held a gun in his hand and aimed it right at Peter's head. How did they get into a situation like this, well that in itself is a long story.

Many of you believe that Peter Parker was an only child right? Well you're wrong, I am his twin sister, his older twin by 12 minutes. My name is (Y/n) Parker and I've always been different from the moment my life turned to darkness or should I say coldness.

I don't know when it first happened, maybe after Peter and I had learned when our parents died in a plane crash but all I remember was feeling so cold that I had to be taken to the hospital and be put in the Intensive care unit for over a week till my body temperature got back to normal before Peter and I went to live with our Aunt May and Uncle Ben.

Then that car-jacker murdered our uncle, and it was then I finally snapped. I remember going to an alleyway, letting out a piercing scream and all of a sudden an icy mist came out of my mouth and froze the entire alleyway. I also took notice that my long (n/h/c) had turned almost pale white, like snow.

Ever since that day, I had changed completely. My heart had become cold that night and I vowed vengeance against my uncle's killer.

From that day on I had called myself the "Ice Queen" and vowed to give the proper punishments for those with hearts as cold as ice. Prison wouldn't change the fact that these criminals would still be breathing while their victims were six feet under, so any cold blooded killers out there, you better pray you don't feel my cold wind at your neck.

To hide any suspicion from my Aunt and brother, I would use my magic to make my hair appear to be the usual (h/c) it's always been but when it comes time for me to "go out", the magic fades and my snow white hair comes out.

Once I became the "Ice Queen", I vowed to never involve May or Pete into it because if any of the crime lords found out I had a weakness in my ice cold heart.....I don't even want to think about what they would do to them. I refuse to lose anyone else in my family.

It was your typical after school day. Pete and I were walking home from school when he had gotten a text on his phone and he said.

"Ahh its Mr. Stark hey (y/n) can you tell May that Mr. Stark wants to see me".

"Of course Pete, just try to be home in time for dinner. I'm making my special Chinese dinner tonight".

"And miss the chance to eat your cooking I don't think so. Thanks (n/n) love you!" He pecked my cheek and he took off running.

Stark. Oh how that name made shivers run down my spine, and I don't mean in the good way. I had known of my twin brother's little secret of him being Spiderman. Oh he can fool May but he can't fool me, I'm his twin and we got a super power of our own and we can tell when the other is hiding something. That and I snooped through his room and happened to find his Spiderman suit (I have a right to do that as big sister it says so in the book).

But still it's no excuse that someone as big as Tony Stark came into our apartment asking for Peter for a "grant" that I knew he never applied for to suddenly go off to Germany and when he comes home, he has a black eye. That is unacceptable in my book, no one hurts my little brother or leads him into danger and gets away with it.

After arriving home, I went into my room and released my magic and my hair turned back into the snow white it had become nine months ago. My room was kept cold due to my powers but I didn't care, I lay on my bed and let out an icy sigh as the ceiling began to frost over.

I then turned to a picture of Tony Stark that I had taken from a newspaper and quickly made an ice shard out of my hand and threw it dead center at Stark's smug face.

"You dare bring my brother into danger, if I see another injury on him I'll make you suffer" I sneered coldly to the picture.

"(Y/n)? Peter? I'm home!" I heard Aunt May's voice ring out. I looked up at the ceiling and made the frost disappear, I also got rid of the ice shard as well as the picture and made my hair turn back to my normal hair color and cried out.

"Hey May!" I left my room and helped her put the groceries away and as I put the milk up she asked me.

"Is Peter with that Tony Stark again?"

"Oh yeah, supposedly Mr. Stark had texted him for another assignment, happened after we got done with school".

"Ahh I see, well can't say I'm a fan of him though. Always taking Peter out of his school time you know I had gotten a call from his principal about him sleeping in class again today".

"You and me both May, you and me both. But he said he'd be home in time for dinner, did you pick up what I needed?"

"Right here, when can you start?" She took out some of the ingredients that I needed.

"Well school was pretty exhausting but I can start cooking within an hour or so, just to allow me some time to rest up and recuperate after a long day".

"Understandable, come on I also have some other things to bring in since I made several errands today, mind helping me?"

"Of course". I followed her to the elevator and I helped her bring in the dry cleaning, some art supplies, and a new sewing kit. After a little rest for about an hour and a half I began preparing my delicious and famous Chinese meal.

By the time 6 o'clock struck, Aunt May and I prepared the food but Peter had yet to show up. As May and I sat down at the table and of course as a run of thumb in her house "No one eats until the whole family is here". I began to get a little antsy about Peter's wellbeing. After that Vulture incident I knew he was getting himself into more dangerous waters that only I knew about and did not want him to be involved in.

By the time it was almost 8pm, May decided that we should just pack it up and not let it go to waste so we cleared up the table and she said that she was going to get us take out while I cleaned the rest of the kitchen. All my hard work gone to waste, Peter promised me he would be here but no Stark once again kept him from being here with his family just so he could go off and put himself in more danger than he's ever had in his whole life.

I then heard the sound of a window opening, I revealed a small ice mirror into my hand and from the small bit of frost I had hidden in Peter's room to judge my suspicion on whether he was Spiderman or not, I saw him coming into his room in his Spider suit. I allowed the mirror to disappear and I tried to keep myself calm as I soon heard called out to Peter.

"Where have you been little brother?" I heard him muttering then he called out.

"I am so, so sorry (n/n) but Mr. Stark kept me in later than I had expected. I really did try to come home in time but you know how he is". I soon heard him walking into the kitchen as I now held the pot that held my Sweet and Sour pork.

"You know you could've called or at least had the decency of sending me a text before bailing out on my dinner".

"I am so sorry (y/n) you have to believe me you of all people need to believe me how hard I tried to come back home. Here why don't I cleanup since you spent hours making the meal". Now I didn't mean for it to happen but my cold, icy heart made me lift up the pot, turn to Peter and slam it right on the table spilling out everything as I growled at him.

"IS THIS ALL A GAME TO YOU!? I was frantic!"

"What are you talking about?" Peter asked with such fear in his eyes. Seeing him afraid of me I tried to calm myself out as my voice whispered and choked out.

"You Pete, alone. In the city at this time of night, I thought—thought someone had hurt you". Soullessly I turned to the table and began to gather up the pork and noodles in my fists as tears filled my eyes and I continued on with a quiver in my voice, "Like our parents.....Like—Uncle Ben".

"(Y/n) I'm fine. I promise I may not be the biggest or the strongest guy in our school, but I know how to outwit someone should they try anything, I promise you won't get a call from the police to ID my body. I refuse to do that to you and May, especially after.....well you know that night". I felt Peter hold me in his arms and I leaned my head against his chest feeling my twin's heartbeat telling me that he was alive and well until I looked up at him.

"Peter what happened to your eye?"

"What oh that umm—it was an accident. As I was getting something from the top of Mr. Stark's shelf, I accidentally slipped and the binder fell onto my eye thus creating this". Liar. I knew he was lying, someone did this to him and I'm going to find out who. Composing myself I stood up and told him.

"I'll get you an ice pack". I got out of his arms and walked towards the cabinet and took out a large bag then hiding behind the open freezer, I used my powers to fill the bag with ice then I grabbed a towel and wrapped the bag in the towel and handed it to Peter and he thanked me but I turned away from him and continued to clean up.

Outside we both heard the sound of police sirens and I stated soullessly out loud.

"This dreadful city we live in. The darker it gets, the more dangerous it becomes, someone outta do something about that don't you think?"

Aunt May had come in and we ate our Chinese takeout then we all decided to turn in for the night. Just as I was turned on my TV, there was a news update about a car chase that about had been going on for the past two hours with a suspect that police had been chasing down for six months but each time they try to catch him, he slips free and avoids capture. Well not this time.

My hair slowly turned white and my usual clothes turned into my Ice Queen armor. A chainmail like ice color dress with small ice sharps coming down from my neck to my lower abdomen. I also made my Ice Queen mask that covered my entire upper face so that no one would be able to see who I was. I levitated in the air and then took off flying with the wind towards the street the guy was last seen.

*Basically this dress but imagine it as an icy blue/white color and the mask is below. I do NOT OWN THE RIGHTS TO THESE PICTURES!! THEY BELONG TO THEIR RIGHTFUL OWNERS!!*

Police cars and sirens were lighting up the streets and their sirens piercing the Queens streets. The car they were chasing exhilarated as fast as I could until it slammed into the yard of an old abandoned warehouse and soon the driver got out as fast as he could and disappeared into the warehouse.

Inside the man held out his gun ready to fire at anything or anyone that would come out as he held his big sack of money that he had 'obtained' from the bank down on 14th street. Suddenly he heard a clank from behind him.

"Who's there!?" Frost began to form from the windows and being the completely paranoid thief he was, he fired at the window only to see nothing there. Soon he felt a cold nip at the back of his neck and he turned around so quickly he probably gave himself whiplash. "I'm not playing anymore! Come out before I pump you full of lead!"

A small trail of ice slowly crept up behind him then suddenly it shot out freezing his feet to the ground. He let out a cry and tried to fire at the ice but before he could pull the trigger, his gun became so cold he dropped the gun as he cried out in pain from the cold. He looked at his hand to see it was completely broken out and frost bitten from where the gun handle was.

"Metal and steel always attract the cold, didn't you ever watch Titanic and see what the iceberg did?" I then stepped out from the shadows and the guy already terrified. Like all my victims before him he pleaded for his life to be spared.

"You don't understand. I was framed! Just give me a chance. Just give me a chance!"

"You don't deserve that chance. Robbing a bank, suspected for over 20 murders and rapes in the last six months". I then gripped his face tightly in my hand and removed his ski mask and from the police search lights shined right on the guys face and my felt my cold exterior literally crumble to pieces.

This man was the one who killed Uncle Ben. How do I know it was him? Because I was there when it happened.

I was scheduled to meet with a couple of friends at the library for a podcast project for one of my classes, I wanted to walk there but Uncle Ben insist that he drive me there. He felt that it wasn't safe for me walking 7 blocks alone at night. I tried to reason with him that I would be fine but like the father figure he's been to me since our parents died, he didn't budge and I let him drive me to the library.

Just as I was about to get out, this man comes out of nowhere and asks for the car. As stubborn as he was, Uncle Ben refused then the man forced my Uncle out of the car and the two of them began to rumble a bit. I tried to help him but he shoved me off and then he got on top of me pinning me to the car before trying to take off my shirt.

Uncle Ben got him off me but that's when he pulled out a gun and shot Uncle Ben right in the heart. Traumatized from what almost happened and from what I just saw, I could only crawl up to Ben and the car-jacker drove off with my Uncle's car and Ben died right there in my arms. After police and ambulance came and wanted to check on me, that's when I left and went into that alleyway and my powers soon revealed themselves.

As I stared at this man with wide eyes I felt something inside of me just snap. I gripped his throat and allowed my hand to become so unbearably cold, it literally burned his skin. The man cried out in agony as I sneered at him.

"Do you remember what you did 9 months ago at the Public Library? You better remember like your life depended on it you bastard!"

"I don't....please......"

"Don't bullshit me damnit! Why don't you take a closer look at my face"? I then revealed myself under the mask and showed im who I was. I even used my magic to turn my hair brown so that way he'd remember who I was. As soon as he saw me, his face was all I needed to know. "I've been waiting a long time for this!" I sneered as my hair turned back to white and my eyes phased to soulless grey mist color.

I released his feet but kicked him in the ball then I formed an ice bow staff and began to repeatedly beat on the guy as hard as I could. With each blow, I growled louder and more animalistic until I raised the staff high in the air before bringing it down across him sending him to the wall. He coughed out blood and I stated again as I strutted towards him.

"That was just for all that you've done to the people of this city. For all the women you've raped, the people you've killed and the places you've robbed. But what I have for you killing my Uncle, will be slow. Intimately and you will know every ounce of pain you've caused me and my family that night when you pulled the trigger".

"Hate to break this lovefest up but I think the proper judges will give him what he deserves". I looked up to see my twin brother in his Spiderman outfit just chilling above the catwalk of the warehouse.

"This doesn't concern you Spiderman!" I sneered trying to get my brother out of this.

"Sorry to tell you this babe but it is my problem. Cause from where I'm standing if I was a cop and I saw this, I would arrest both of you right here and now. So let me take care of him while you go run and hide. Didn't you know the Accords has been imprisoning any stray super humans lately?"

"Then why aren't you locked up with them?" I sassed at my twin.

"That—that doesn't matter I'm just trying to protect you here!"

"Well so am I now get out of here Pete before I make you leave!" I snapped.

"And I told you—wait, wait a minute. Did you just call me Pete? Only one person calls me.....Oh God (Y/n)?" I sighed deeply and briefly revealed my hair color to show him that it was me. "Wha—how... (N/n) how did....."

"I get these powers? Funny story actually. You remember when mom and dad died and I had to stay in the ICU for over a week? Well it was around that time my powers awakened. But it wasn't until this savage killed our Uncle that my powers truly came out. He's the one who killed Ben Pete and he deserves to be punished!"

"I agree (y/n) but not like this. Let's just take him to the police together and they'll—"

"The cops!?" I let out an icy laugh then I sneered at him. "The court won't do shit brother. They'll just give him a life sentence with no parole or if they do give him the death penalty, he'll be waiting sometime between 10-50 years before then, maybe even then he'll die in his prison cell. Well not this time, not him. This time I'm calling the shots, I've called all the shots on all those other low-lives who have killed people or tried to take advantage over people in the Night". I turned back towards the brute sprawled out beneath me.

"(Y/n) please. You can still change this, you won't have to do this anymore. Look at what this man has already turned you into. This is not who you are, I know you more than anyone else in this world, and do you think I will sit here and watch you destroy yourself. Remember what Uncle Ben always told us when we were kids?"

How could I ever forget the life lessons that Uncle Ben told us? He only told them to us every day ever since Pete and I became teenagers but this one word of wisdom I will never forget. And I bet most of you probably know what that is.

With great Power, comes great Responsibility.

I soon felt Peter's gloved hand take mine and he pleaded to me one last time.

"Please sis, let go of your hatred. Don't let vengeance consume you any longer that it already has. Please, I want my twin sis back". I looked at him and he looked at me. Taking his mask off, I could see the tears forming in his eyes wanting me to let go of my vengeance and take the rightful path and go with him to turn this murderer in and have him be punished the right way.

Suddenly I felt pain in my left side. I let out a gasp as I slowly began to crumble to my knees as Pete caught me in his arms and held me close to him trying to call out to me but everything was beginning to look blurry at least to me. I felt wet on my side and numbness took over me as Peter was calling out to me but I couldn't hear anything.

*3rd POV*

As Peter held his twin who had just been shot by the crook in his arms begging her to hang on he looked up to see the crook holding his gun up aiming right at him.

"So you brats were related to that old geezer with the car huh? Well meet him in hell". Suddenly frosty mist surrounded the warehouse so thick you could barely see the end of your nose. Pete felt his sister rise up from his arms and as the mist began to clear, standing before the two boys was a haunting image of (Y/n) Parker.

Her outer appearance now looked like a haunting lake spirit. She almost glowed a dark black and grey and her eyes were now pure black instead of white. She raised her hand up and the crook was levitated in the air and as (Y/n) spoke in a deep, almost demonic voice, the crook screamed in pure agony.

"You have no power here. William B. Franco. You are meaningless! Pathetic! A morsel! Now burn in the Icy Hell FOR ALL ETERNITY!!!" As William let out one last painful scream, his whole body was now completely covered in frostbite as he had been frozen from the inside out, he then exploded into black ice before a powerful magical light exploded throughout the warehouse and (Y/n) was now back to normal with the gunshot still at her side. She stumbled backwards as she groaned in pain but her twin was there to catch her and hold her in his arms once again.

As he saw the ice bits of the man who had murdered their Uncle scattered everywhere, he was shocked at what he had seen his sister do after just being shot.

"Holy shit (y/n)" Peter mumbled.

"I'd agree with you on that kid, by the way you're welcome for hacking into the police department for taking them away from the warehouse just before your sister went all Dark Ice Queen on the guy. Is she alright?" Peter looked up to see Tony Stark in his Ironman suit.

"I don't know Mr. Stark uhhh Karen read me her vitals!"

'Your sister will live Peter. That sudden Power she just experienced somehow stopped the bleeding but her energy is draining fast, she's got about a ten minute window before the bleeding resumes'.

"Mr. Stark please can you help my sister!?"

"Alright but on one condition".

"Anything name it".

*Time skip to Avenger's Facility 1st POV*

I woke up to see bright lights everywhere and I heard machines beeping softly beside me. To my left I saw Peter out of his Spiderman uniform and back into normal clothes.

"Pete?" I rasped out.

"(Y/n) oh thank god you're alright!" He embraced me tightly which made my groan in pain making him release me and apologize profusely.

"Where are we?" I asked.

"Avengers facility. I had your brother bring you here and our medical team managed to save you before your wound reopened. How you feeling Elsa?"

"Don't call me Elsa!" I sneered icily.

"(Y/n) please I know you never liked Mr. Stark but he saved your life".

"Yeah which means you owe me kid, and I know just how you can pay me back since your brother has agreed along to the terms I have for both of you".

"I swear if I'm stuck bringing you cold ice cream, I will freeze this entire facility" I growled.

"Nope. But I won't deny getting the ice cream was my first proposition but I've come up with something better for yah kid".

*FF a few weeks later*

"So you still coming to the Decathlon meeting next week right?" asked my friend Mikaela.

"Of course just as soon as I get done working at my new Internship".

"You know I had a feeling with Peter taking the Stark Internship that he would eventually come find you, took him long enough didn't it?"

"Yeah well I'll admit that Pete's more of the brains of the bunch. Well see yah Kee-kee".

"See yah (n/n)!" I then got in the limo that was here to pick me up and I was taken on the 2 and a half hr. drive Upstate to the Avengers Facility. Standing outside the facility was none other than Tony Stark and my brother Peter. I got out of the limo and hugged my brother and he said.

"Glad you agreed to this (y/n). Oh man this is gonna be awesome! Spiderman and the Ice Queen working together to become the next Avengers!"

"Don't go getting too far there kid, you're still grounded from that Vulture incident. You're lucky I gave you back the suit when I did, let's just hope your sister here will be better behaved than you". Mr. Stark said as he put his shades on and urged us to follow him inside. "Welcome Miss Parker, to the Avengers Facility".

This was the agreement Tony had for me. Once I was feeling better, instead of turning me over to the government for unleashing my powers to the public and revealing that I was the Ice Queen, he offered me a position in training alongside my brother to become an Avenger's trainee.

Reluctantly I agreed and now here I am. As I walked through the facility and saw everything they had to offer, I began to think maybe this wasn't such a bad idea I mean at least I'm not in a prison cell away from my family for doing what I believe was right for the people.

Plus I think Mr. Stark might have a soft spot for me since I may remind him of a certain soldier who's now a war criminal. But as long as I'm with my brother and I can finally keep an eye on him to make sure he stays out of immense trouble, I'm okay with this.

#peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker x sister! reader #marvel #marvel fandom #marvel imagine #marvel imagines #mcu #marvel mcu #tom holland #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland imagines #tom holland fanfic #tom holland imagine #peter parker imagine #peter parker imagines #peter parker fanfiction #spider-man #spider-man homecoming #mcu fanfiction #mcu imagine #mcu imagines #mcu fandom #spiderman imagine #spiderman fanfic #spiderman x reader #marvel fanfics

[askmyboys]

Xovarkzis

Here’s the last god/goddess I made so far! More to come im sure lmao

| Name: Xovarkzis (pronunciation: Zo-Vark-Zis) God of Time (also has some power over life and death)

| Nicknames: Xo (again pronounced as Zo) or Vark/Ark

| Gender: He/Him, They/Them, She/Her, and It/It’s, gender doesn’t STRICTLY matter for them, you can call them a god or a goddess either one

| Age: It’s speculated that perhaps Xovarkzis has been around since the beginning of time, their specific age is unknown BUT it’s clear that he is over countless centuries old

| Height: 500ft (when they come down to visit Earth they shift down to about 6’3”)

| Species/Race: Well its obvious but still, just to reiterate- God/Goddess

| Hair Color: The left side of his hair is White and the right side of his hair is Black (his hair is a quiff style)

| Eye Color: Left eye is pure white and the right eye is pure black (they have a third eye on their forehead that is mixed between black n white, it isn’t two eyes, its just one eye with split colors, the left side of the eye is pure white and of course the right side is pure black)

| Skin Color/Body Type: The left side of his body is black and the right side is white (ayo a bit of a reversal there lmao) and he’s pretty lanky tbh

| Appearance: She’s got a few outfits BUT the main one is a white toga with a long black silk piece that’s draped over his shoulder (it’s got some white wording sewn into it but the language seems to be unknown, Xo’s language has been lost for centuries, you’d be lucky to find ANYONE aside from the goddess themself that speaks it or can even translate it, if you REALLY wanna know I’ll tell you, it’s basically going to translate into a blessing) it wears black and white victorian style boots (you know the boot got them h e e l s) for some reason he seems to have antlers, b i g ones- likewise the left side is a white antler and the right side is a black antler, he has necklaces hanging from those antlers full of Turritella Agate stones(it is believed to help in times of change, dispelling negative thoughts and reliving conditions of fatigue) and Snowflake Obsidian stones (it’s a 'stone of purity' bringing balance to the body, mind, and spirit. Said to be beneficial for the skin and veins) and she has a necklace she wears on her neck that is a Sodalite Stone (it helps to calm and clear the mind, bring joy and relieve a heavy heart. Said to aid the metabolism and lymphatic system)

He wears a white glove on his left hand and then a black one on the right (they cut the tips out of them so their black and white claws can peep through BUT ONLY for the claws, I’ll explain the gloves being a VERY crucial detail in side facts)

They have razor sharp teeth (they also have a circle beard btw, it being the colors of each part of the respective skin color ya know), their ears are pointed and they also wear black n white gauges and other earrings of that color in their ears as well, that’s all for the jewelry however- they can also grow black and white wings (v feathery n fluffy wings), they also have a black based tail and then white fluff at the end (p much a dragon-esque looking tail), they seem to have a few scars here and there but nothing TOO major, it just appears to be from a few fights that must’ve ensued sometime in her life.

| Personality: Xovarkzis is an… Interesting being, it usually spends time by itself, tending to her own world and keeping everything in order, he’s usually VERY calm and collected in every situation possible since he’s seen it all pretty much, they’ve seen most outcomes when it comes to life, all the questions, the answers, etc- Xovarkzis is essentially almost an all knowing being, when it comes to fighting Xo has never been one to choose a side, they always stay out of matters that don’t concern them, it’s just… What happens a f t e r  a fight, especially if it gets… Messy… They do warn of the consequences of every action, every choice has it’s consequences and if someone thinks they are ABOVE consequences? They are a fool, even Xovarkzis to be as powerful and high ranking being as she is, even he’ll admit he is not free from consequence and he never will be... 

Xovarkzis finds mortals to be such… Interesting beings, Xo loved to study them whenever they could, always watching and observing from afar whatever it may be, whether their making decisions and choices or simply going about their life… Life ...Another subject as well as death, that Xo knows very well, Xo’s seen such much death in her centuries, at first she had questioned why death had to really exist, why did people have to be taken, taken away from their loved ones, taken away from the living, and so… Easily too... Ark had even gone as far to see if it could even s t o p death but hah, when they look back at that, such a f o o l i s h desire, death, albeit a tragedy by most… Can be beautiful in many ways, a lot fear death, Ark cannot blame them nor would she ever BUT, people tend to forget, there IS still beauty in death just as there is beauty in life.

Xovarkzis always tries to show any mortals that wind up before them that fact, it’s not a way to ease them into death, there is no such way to ease into death unfortunately, but there’s still the beauty, at the VERY least Xo can show them that before leading them to their final destination, Xo might be the god/goddess of life and death (as well as time which I’ll get to in a moment) but they cannot bring a person back from the dead, that would go against EVERYTHING they believe in and it’s impossible anyways, death is permanent, and even if there were a way, if they brought them back, that person would NEVER be the same… Well in THAT regard anyways BUT there is a… “Special Rule” If a person is taken before their time is up? ...There CAN be a pardon but it depends on the person really and the situation, and it still goes against what Xo believes in, in, well a way but… Sometimes an exception needs to be made, if their time was not up and it happened to be an… “Unfortunate” circumstance then they must continue on their journey.

Xo will even admit “Despite my beliefs… Your time has n o t run out… There is still so much you must do, so much to accomplish… So, just this once, I will send you back… But remember, life isn’t something you should take for granted, so many loved ones, whether it be a friend, family, or partner… You have someone who truly cares about you out there, so try and live life to the fullest every day possible… Remember, you w o n ‘ t get another chance like this, next time, it will be permanent I’m afraid…” now as for time, Xo holds time with a fondness… Time can be a blessing and a… Curse to some… Xo used to see time as a curse but they learned quickly, you must do what you can and will with the time you are given, never be afraid to get out there and do whatever it is you desire, time may seem so short… It may even feel as though time is plotting and working against you, but that is simply not true… It’s all about working with the time you are given, there is no such thing as more or less with time, and you had better make the most of the time you ARE given, for one day, your clock, as will everyone else’s, will run out.

Xo keeps the time in order (kinda like father time in a way), she CAN control it in a way, meaning it can stop and start time BUT there could only be one reason for stopping, starting, and speeding up time- And if that reason EVER comes to pass ...Whatever god/goddess/being you worship, you had better p r a y to them, pray as hard as you can… (Xo cannot reverse time however technically speaking, unless you wish to count them bringing a person back via unfortunate circumstances then I suppose in a way she can do that but still) Xo’s always been fascinated with how time worked to be honest, it’s interesting all the things time can make happen… Mortals, plants, etc- those grow up, worlds they age and sometimes become more progressive than others, and mostly people change with time, some anyways- Everything changes with time marching ahead, and that, to Xo is a wonderful thing…

That’s honestly the best I can sum them up?? There’s obvs gonna be more to them but for now this is good for personality basis (Xo despite being so blunt with things, Xo is a sweetheart who just wants the best for everyone, just wants peace, equality, and for people to live life to their fullest potential, Xo wants to see them succeed, failure? ...Failure is natural and should not be something to fear, you can always learn from the mistakes you make and next time you try something, then you’ll know what to avoid next time around, failure in a way should be treated as growth, as growing and learning because it is)

| Side Facts: Xo isn’t one for weapons BUT it does wield a black handled scythe that has a white blade attached to it (if you REALLY want, Xo can be technically called a Reaper even if he is much more than that, but if you wish to classify her as that then so be it), Ark’s world is also made up of black and white (literally if you look at the world, it’s split down the middle, black and white, nothing more nothing less, it’s world is actually considered a “Void” given that there isn’t anything really there, the only thing there in the split is Xo’s “throne” of course because it’s literally right in the center of the world it’s black and white as well, they have decorated it with various stones (like the Turritella, Snowflake, and Sodalite stones) there are a few others that are p much otherworldly, those stones can only be found in Xo’s world (I’ll leave those up to interpretation lmao), there ARE shelves lining the “room” however full of hourglasses, all of various types, various names are labelled on them.

Even Xo’s own, for even Xo, despite being a god/goddess n such, does have a due date himself, all the gods/goddesses do, one day their time will be up just like everyone else’s, granted… They D O live a LOT longer than mortals, animals, etc… Hence why their hourglasses are so big and almost infinite, but Xo knows, deep down, despite their infinite size, the sand will reach the bottom one day and then that will be it… Xo isn’t scared of death anymore, they haven’t been for MANY centuries now (they used to be afraid, they used to not understand why they had to even deal with the things they did, why they were the god/goddess they were, but one day, it finally understood… And that was that)

(If Xo and Thanatos (side note, i do realize that’s an actual god name but this one in particular i made is… woo b o y, just- yikes), but Xo and Thanatos would honestly be at each other’s throats, Xo has never liked picking a side in a fight, has never been one for fighting anyway- but Thanatos would disrupt EVERYTHING… That sick disgusting excuse for a god doesn’t even deserve his status, he treats death like a game for his entertainment, he’ll LITERALLY go out of his own way to make everyone suffer in any way he can, and Xo will not have any mockery and slander toward life nor death in this way so those two would c l a s h)

You would think Xo would live forever given their status and being the god they are BUT, it’s definitely not true! They can even be killed even though ...That’s LITERALLY near impossible, not ABSOLUTELY impossible but still, someone would have to get a REALLY lucky and fatal shot in, however even if they were to fade (if Xo dies, imma say this right now, there’ll be a spotlight on them and they’ll start fading away into little specs and drifting into the wind) the balance of life, death, and time will not implode, there are many other gods/goddesses that will be ready to take Ark’s place even if it may be sooner than expected, there’s always a chance after all…

Also fine, yeah- Unus Annus inspired me p heavily here BUT not ENTIRELY?? I just wanted to make another god/goddess for the world, Osmundus has never met Xo despite Xo sometimes visiting other worlds/Earth, and literally meeting his husband- speaking of… Arvish? ...Xo will forever remember what he did to everyone, to all the mortals, his own people even, everyone he hurt and killed- However, Xo holds no grudges, Xo will not haunt him, besides Vark knows deep down Arvish is tormented constantly by his own head, it’s a wonder the old beast hasn’t driven himself insane with all that guilt, Xo has told him before however “You cannot change the past, what’s done is done… However… ...You can make anew for yourself, it all depends on the choices you make in the remainder of your life, so if I were you, I would make the right choices as best I could” Arvish… Took Xo’s words to heart especially, and told Xo he’d try his best.

Also one thing they have to question now… ...Why is it that the mortals want them to say “Memento Mori” so much? Granted, they DO know what it means and even the words “Unus Annus” I mean she knows what BOTH words mean but it seems to hold such value and significance to the mortals...

#Xovarkzis #my oc #original character #god of time oc #god of life and death oc

[contemplativepancakes]

15x09 coda: wouldn’t be gone

for @casthegrumpy (;

or read it on AO3:

“You couldn’t forgive me, and you couldn’t move on. You were too angry. I left, but you didn’t stop me,” Cas spat.

Dean had just stared at Cas. He wanted me to stop him? He didn’t say anything then, but he’s regretting it now. Now that Cas is missing, now that Dean’s alone in purgatory, again. Dean stops and puts a hand on a tree trunk for balance, tracing his fingers over the rough bark.

Cas.

Cas, I hope that you can hear me. Wherever you are, it’s not too late…

I should’ve stopped you. You’re my best friend, but just let you go, because it was easier than admitting I was wrong.

I don’t know why I get so angry… I just know that it’s always been there and when things go bad… It comes out. And I can’t stop it. No matter how bad I want to, I can’t stop it.

And I forgive you. Of course I forgive you.

I’m sorry it took me so long.

I’m so sorry it took me until now to say it.

Cas, I’m so sorry.

By the time Dean’s choked his way through his prayer, tears are dripping down his face, but he has no time to waste. “Okay,” he breathes. “Okay.”

He clambers up from his knees, feeling them creak because of the dampness seeping into his bones. At least this is familiar territory. He knows how to look for Cas here, right? But last time, there was no time limit. Fuck, how is he ever going to do this?

 Somehow, through a miracle to beat all miracles, he finds Cas leaning against a tree. Dean shudders a breath of belief. He can’t believe how lucky he is. He lurches forward to fold Cas into a hug. He clings to Cas, clutching his fists in that ridiculous trench coat. Cas tells him how he got away from the leviathan, and Dean just lets the smooth cadence of Cas’s voice wash over him, breathing in and out in time with him.

“Cas, I have to say something,” Dean says. He takes a centering breath. He thinks he’s ready to say it. Fuck, he loves Cas so much. What would he have done if he never found him? It’s unthinkable, and Dean can’t bear the thought of Cas not knowing. Not knowing how much he means to Dean, to everyone he’s ever touched. Dean doesn’t think he’s ever met anyone as good as Cas, as unwaveringly loyal. And, God, it’s so far past time he let Cas know.

But then Cas is saying, “You don’t have to say it. I heard your prayer.”

Dean swallows, his adam’s apple bobbing in his throat. Well, fuck- way to put a pin in it. But Cas is right, the clock on how long the rift will be open is counting down, and they need to move. There’ll be another opportunity. Dean watches as Cas walks away, but this time Dean’s determined to stay by his side.

 Later, as they’re sitting together in the bunker’s kitchen, Dean’s trying to work up his nerve again when Sam walks in. Dean looks up. “Did she leave?” he asks, about Eileen.

“Yeah,” Sam says tonelessly, and Dean wishes he could impart some hard won wisdom on Sam, but some things you just have to learn for yourself.

They talk for a minute, brainstorming about how they could defeat Chuck. Dean knows they’ll think of something; they always do.

Dean knocks back the last of his whiskey, but he doesn’t find the liquid courage he was seeking. “I’m beat. I’m gonna go to bed,” he yawns.

Cas watches him as he stretches, and Dean’s face flushes red. “Night,” he says and beats a hasty retreat.

 Dean dances around the words for days. They haunt him, those three little words. He’s always thrown his hands up at the protagonists in the rom coms he claimed not to like when they couldn’t nut up and get together, but now he has a little more sympathy. Although, he muses, his life is probably more like a soap opera than a rom com. Less comedy, more stupid plot twists.

He looks up from staring down at the table in the library when Cas turns a page more violently than Dean would deem strictly necessary. “Problem?” Dean asks.

“No,” Cas says, but he hesitates. “I told you I heard your prayer, right?”

“Yeah? And I meant it, Cas. I’m sorry. I was a dick. Nothing that happened was your fault.”

“Yes, I know,” Cas says, and Dean snorts. “I just meant… you haven’t stopped praying since then.”

Dean looks up, feeling less like a deer in the headlights and more like roadkill. “W-what?”

“I’ve been waiting for you to tell me, but, I’m impatient. I told you I wanted you to tell me to stay, but maybe I needed to give you a reason to. Dean, I lo-”

“Wait!” Dean blurts, and Cas looks at him in exasperation.

“Dean, this is getting ridiculous,” Cas huffs, “I-”

Dean pushes back his chair and jumps up. “Just- wait. I have to tell you this. I mean, you already told me once, right?” Dean laughs weakly.

He kneels beside Cas’s chair, and Cas raises an expectant eyebrow at him. Dean gulps. “Cas, man, you’re right. I haven’t stopped thinking about this since I got you back. Fuck, you were almost stuck in purgatory again. I don’t think I could have dealt with that. And, yeah, I agree. This is ridiculous. It got ridiculous five years ago. It’s stupid to be scared of this when Chuck could snap his fingers and end it all at any second.” Dean breathes. “I’m not scared. I love you.”

And then Cas is on him, almost falling out of his chair to catch Dean’s lips in a kiss. It feels so fucking good, and Dean would almost think waiting ten years was worth it if it didn’t mean they could have been doing this the whole time.

Cas pulls back, his lips slick with saliva. “I love you,” he whispers, and pulls Dean’s head to his shoulder.

They clutch at each other, running fingers wherever they can touch, seeking reassurance that this is real. Cas’s words from weeks ago come back to him. We’re real.

Dean pulls back and ducks his head bashfully. “Sorry it took me so long to say it.”

Cas runs a hand through Dean’s hair. “It’s okay. Some of us are more emotionally stunted than others.”

That startles a laugh out of Dean. “You little shit,” he says, but then Cas is kissing him again and any other words get lost between their mouths.

Dean’s already panting and starting to chub up when Cas yanks them to their feet and shoves his thigh between Dean’s legs. His thighs are everything Dean’s ever imagined they’d be, but he can’t help but wonder what they would feel like in some other positions. Dean drops to his knees, the first time he’s been on knees because of his love for Cas instead of his grief, and Cas looks down at him in wonder as he runs his hands through Dean’s hair. Dean’s sure his hair is a mess, spiky and unkempt with the way Cas keeps touching it, but he finds he doesn’t mind. Cas tugs, and that’s enough of a signal for him. He unzips Cas’s slacks and pulls them down, mouthing at his boxer briefs. Cas is starting to harden when Dean reaches up to pull him through the slit in his boxers. Dean feels the heat, the velvet slide, the heft, and he is thoroughly appreciating it, pumping his hand up and down Cas’s shaft as he strokes him to full hardness.

“Dean,” Cas pants, his voice even deeper than usual, “that feels so good.”

“You ain’t seen no-”

“Hey guys, I think I found something.” Dean turns his head to see the very unfortunate sight of Sam approaching, his tablet in hand. He hasn’t even looked at them yet, and he grabs at Cas to try and tuck him back into his underwear, but all that results in is his hand on Cas’s dick when Sam does look up.

“Oh my god! Are you for real? In the library?” Sam looks scandalized, and the tightness in Dean’s chest lessens when he realizes the thing Sam is most upset about is them defiling all his precious books.

Dean manages a smirk as he shakily rises to his feet. He combs a hand through his hair, confirming that Cas had done his best to make it look like he stuck a fork in an outlet. He shrugs his shoulders. “What can I say? I don’t know man, Cas just got, like, overcome with this animal lu-”

Sam cuts him off with a raised hand as Cas elbows him in the ribs. “More information than I need to know. What I do know, though, is that you guys have your own room. Two, even, between both of you. And you couldn’t have moved this there?”

Dean shares a heated look with Cas. “You know what, Sammy, you’re right. Let’s go, Cas.”

Sam shoots him a bitchface, one of the classics, and Dean can’t help but grin in return. He grabs Cas’s hand and drags him towards the door, but Sam shoots out a hand and holds Dean by the elbow.

“Hey. I’m happy for you,” Sam says softly.

“Yeah, Sammy. Me too,” he replies as he looks over to see Cas’s gooey expression. “Me too.”

When Dean wakes up the next morning, stretching and smiling in contentedness at the pleasant ache thrumming through him, the bed is cold. His smile fades as he gropes around on the other side of the bed and his fingertips don’t catch on anything but rough sheets.

He gets up and pulls his robe around him. He ambles through the bunker to the kitchen, poking his head in, but there’s no one.

Next, he goes to the library, but Cas isn’t there either, just Sam, resting a book on his stomach as he sleeps.

“Cas?” Dean calls, a crack in his voice.

There’s no answer.

#supernatural #spn spoilers #coda #15x09 coda #15x09 #destiel #contemplative writing

[dailyaudiobible]

01/28/2021 DAB Transcript

Exodus 5:22-7:25, Matthew 18:21-19:12, Psalms 23:1-6, Proverbs 5:22-23

Today is the 28th day of January welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I'm Brian it is an honor to be here with you today as we just lock-in, come around the Global Campfire together and let it all go and let this center us where we belong and orient us to God. So, we are reading in the book of Exodus. We’re just getting started in the book of Exodus, the second book of the Bible and we've been introduced to Moses. Moses has been tasked to be the…the representative of God, basically, God's prophet and to go before the king of Egypt the Pharaoh and demand the release of the Hebrews who have grown to become strong and numerous as a nation themselves. But God is now wanting to set them free from their slavery and so far, that's not going well. And we’ll pick up the story. We’re reading from the English Standard Version this week. Exodus chapter 5 verse 22 through 7 verse 25.

Commentary:

Okay. So, let's catch ourselves up in Exodus in the lay of the land. the Hebrew people, remember Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, who became Israel and had children, the children of Israel. And then Joseph goes to Egypt and then famine comes and those people, 70 of them, go to Egypt and are saved. Those 70 people, we are 400 years in the future now, and those 70 people have become tens of thousands and tens of thousands of people. Moses is one of those people. He was supposed to be as an infant thrown into the Nile River to die, to drown, because Pharaoh was doing away from…well…he was trying to eradicate the male population because these people were becoming…were becoming too powerful. In the end it's Pharaoh's daughter who saves Moses and he's educated, and he kills an Egyptian while defending a Hebrew and he has to go on the run where God appears to him and says, basically we’re gonna go back and set the people free and you're gonna be my mouthpiece. So, he goes back and starts making these announcements and we’re just getting going in the very famous story of the plagues upon Egypt that will one day set the people free. So far not going so well. And this is an important thing for us to look at here because God tells Moses it's not gonna go well, that He’s gonna harden Pharaoh's heart and he's going to resist until he has to be broken essentially. That doesn't seem fair, though, right? That God is going to somehow against the will of Pharaoh make his heart hard so that he has to resist God in order to be broken and he doesn't…like he has no choice in the matter. That’s not what's going on here. What would it take to harden your heart? Maybe way less than we realize. Suppose that you have a bit of authority at your job. You have maybe a whole department under you, representing hundreds of people or maybe, you know, you've a couple of people who have to answer to you. Let's suppose that a subordinate guess an appointment with you and comes before you, demanding that you do something that doesn't make any sense to you and yet they are demanding it it's. And, so, because of the situation and your flummoxed and your like, “wait a minute. Like I’m your boss, not the other way around. And are you trying to take my job?” And then all this kind of pride kind of begins to emerge. And, so, we want to push that person back and put them in their place because they've hardened our hearts. Or they come in with a threat. “If you don't do what I'm telling you to do then bad things are going to happen to you.” And they say that God is going to do this, but they happen to be of a different religion than you and so you don't really respect any of their traditions. And, so, you're like, “I don't know who this is. I don't know what you’re…I don't know what you're trying to do here. Get out of here if you want to keep your job”, right? The heart gets hardened when we are pressed to do what we don't want to do. We don't want to submit anybody's authority. This is exponentially more difficult for Pharaoh because Pharaoh thinks he is a God. And, so, what we have going on here is that the most-high God is speaking through a Hebrew man demanding that the Hebrew people be let go. And Pharaoh is like, “I don't know you're God. Who cares what your God thinks? I am a more powerful God then you're God or you wouldn't be my slaves. Get back to your job. And I'm not supplying you anymore. Get back to your job and find your own supplies.” That is the long and short of what's happening here. And the Bible tells us that pride goes before a fall. And we might…might even know how this story ends. It's a famous Bible story. So, we could say that in the and Pharaoh does find that he is humbled, whether he likes it or not, but then we have to understand that these stories also become a mirror into our soul. What would it take for us to submit in this kind of scenario? And would it be our pride…like would we resist until we were completely broken? Because pride goes before the fall and God does not appreciate pride because pride exalts us. It exalts us above all things. And God in the Bible or in history does not suffer that for long. And, so, yeah, we’re in the middle of a pretty dramatic story but let's find ourselves in this story. And one way to begin to find ourselves in the story today is to observe the hardening of the heart and begin to observe ourselves when our hearts are being hardened because most of the time we’re gonna find pride is a part of that recipe.

Prayer:

Holy Spirit we invite You into that. It is not our desire to be arrogant and prideful people. And yet we’re encouraged to be just that all the time inside of our culture. We need to be dominant; we need to be powerful. And yet this is not the path that leads to life, this is not the way of the gospel. The way of the gospel is that strength is actually found in surrender and that strength is actually found in weakness. So counterintuitive to the way that life is been presented to us. And yet this is the way we were made. So come Holy Spirit and help us to interpret our own hearts by observing when they are becoming hard. Come Holy Spirit we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen

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And that's it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Good morning DAB family this is Flourishing in the Desert and it's Sunday January 24th 2021. I just want to say thank you to all of you. Last year 2020 was a really hard year for me not because of Covid but because of oh the push from God to finally leave an abusive relationship. It was such a struggle. All of last year was such a struggle. And then a dear friend of mine, All the Treasures from Wyoming told me about DAB and I started to listen and I just want you guys to know that your faithful prayers for others for everyone in this community just encouraged me on so many levels and I am forever thankful for your love for the body of Christ, your willingness to put your issues out there, to seek prayer, and also your willingness to pray for others in need. God has blessed me abundantly through you and He continues to carry me through and to bring joy to my day. And I just want to let you guys know that, yeah, you're the best and I just so appreciate you. You touch the lives of others in so many ways, in ways you just don't understand. So, I tip my hat to each one of you and I thank you. Be encouraged today and to know that your blessing others even as you pray for those who are in need. God's blessings on you all. This is Flourishing in the Desert in Cheyenne WY.

Hello Daily Audio Bible family I'm a first-time caller I’ve been listening for about two years and I'm going on my third year and I've become a double DABber listening to the Chronological Bible as well. Thank you, Jill. I live in Texas and I'm calling myself Joyful Paradise in Texas. I chose that name not because my life has been easy, but because through everything I've been through the Lord has been the joy of my life and the one who's carried me through everything and sustained me. I met the Lord at a camp revival as a child and I've walked with Him and I've I've…I've…I've grown in the Lord over the years and this year I turned 70. So, it’s…I've had my share of ups and downs. A good friend of mine downloaded the app on the on…on the…of the Daily Audio Bible onto my phone and said, listen. So, I did, and it has been a blessing to me. It really has been a blessing and I'm so grateful. I'm so grateful to get to know each one of you, to hear your voices, to hear your prayer requests and my heart has been deeply touched many times by many of your requests and I…and I hope to hear more from each one of you. You…and we'll just keep praying for one another. Thank you for this podcast Brian and God bless.

Hello Daily Audio Bible family this is His Dearly Beloved in Minnesota. I've called in a couple of times recently asking for prayer for a pain I've been experiencing. I'm scheduled for a total hysterectomy on February 2nd so I very much would still love your prayers for that. But I'm calling today to encourage each one of you. Today is February 24th, it's a Sunday…January 24th, sorry. It's a Sunday and Brian has been talking about our hearts and how we need to guard our hearts because life springs forth from our hearts. And I'm nearing 60 years old right now. So, I have definitely had my fair share of pieces of my heart strewn along the way and have needed mending. And I'm here to tell you that God absolutely does mend our hearts. My…probably my biggest heartbreak was ten years ago when my husband of 25 years who had been my high school sweetheart. We dated 8 years before we were married at…I was about 21 at the time and he finally released me from our marriage because he had…was feeling that he missed out on a life of dating. And…and as you can imagine that was…that was pretty rough for me. But I'm here to tell you 10 years later God has completely…completely healed and mended my heart. And I wanted to share my intention for the year, which is to give my first…give my wholehearted best first and foremost to God loving and trusting the Lord with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength, shining that love, joy, peace, hope, and light into the world each day. I love you take care.

Hello this is Rachel from Oregon just want to call in for the lady who asked for prayer whose husband of 46 years just left her. This prayer was posted on January 20th. Today I am praying for you on January 24th. And you just got out of the hospital recently from Covid and you have no one to help you at home. And I can't even imagine how hard it must be for you right now the things that are happening in your life and in your situation and feeling so alone. And I am so so sorry. My heart breaks for you. I really really wish that I could come help you. In a heartbeat I would. I would be over to help you at home, but I don't know where you live and chances are it's not nearby me. But Lord I come before You today to ask You to intervene in this lady's life. You know all her needs. You know the pain in her heart and the cry of her heart Lord. Will You please bring her the peace that passes all understanding and help her through this hard time that her husband has left her. And please convict him to repent of leaving her and this divorce and also please bring her in abundance of people in her life to love on her and to help her in any way that she needs. We are meant to serve each other as a body in Christ Lord and I ask that You will just show her Your love through other people and help her to find her hope in You. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Good morning Daily Audio Bible family members this is Abby calling from Maryland. I trust you are all doing well. My goal for this year is to call more often. So, here I am. And I have been so blessed listening to people calling in, you know, especially those who are joining us on board this year 2021. I've heard this lady who is so excited, you know, I believe she's blind and she's just been having a wonderful experience with this community. Welcome to every new member and for…I specifically want to pray for a young man or a man who had called I believe his name was Tilly from Florida who is currently in the hospital. He's scared and, you know, he has chest pains and he said that he's broken hearted because he had to make a confession to his wife. I lift you into the hands of the almighty God and I pray that God heals you. I pray that God wraps His love around you and God shows you how much He loves you and God just restores you, restores your health in Jesus’ name. I pray for each and every member who has called for one thing of the other. God meets each and every one of you at the point of your need. And yes, I am so excited to hear when China does deliver her child. I am looking forward to that. Thank you, Brian for always being awesome. Thank you, Jill for always being awesome. Thank you, this amazing community. You guys are…you are my community. I just look forward to getting into the word of God with you guys every day. You all have a blessed week. This is Abby from Maryland. Stay blessed.

Good morning everyone this is Mary from the United States. As Brian talks about endurance, I just want to join with him and encourage you. Endurance sounds like a strong word of suffrage and drudgery, yet there's freedom in endurance. There's joy in endurance. There's confidence and grace in endurance. Their strength in endurance. There's wisdom in endurance. There's a vision and a sense of purpose in endurance. Endure in love, endure in joy, endure in the morning, endure in the evening, endure in the Lord to the very end. Endurance brings with it joy, peace, rhythm, meaning. Endurance is a gift we can choose or deny. Open the gift and discover its treasures in the box of endurance. Breathe in, breathe out the blessed joy that we can endure in love. Put on foot…put one foot in front of the other, breathe in breath out. The riches gain in endurance. The interest compile in endurance. A rich abundant life as we endure in love.