#i wouldn’t even go as far as saying she was even criticised – it was pointed out and everyone agreed it was unfortunate

[queenshelby]

Yes! Mr Murphy (Rewritten)

PART FIVE: NUDES

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Warning: Angst, Age Gap, Teacher x Student, Mentions of Depression, Anxiety

PLEASE COMMENT AND ENGAGE!

A few more days had passed and, even though you saw Cillian every day at school, the situation between you had not changed.

You tried to keep your distance from each other and, again, he never called you out to answer any questions which, at least to James, seemed strange.

On several occasions, he asked whether Cillian was intimidated by you and, of course, this comment itself amused you.

“Why would he be intimidated by me? I am his student” you explained which is when James put the lack of interaction between Cillian and you down to the fact that you were doing well in his course. Perhaps, Cillian did not have to call you out because he knew that you knew the answers to his questions.

Despite your lack of interaction with each other though, quite often, you noticed Cillian glance at you in a very unconventional way. It was almost like he was day-dreaming about you and you enjoyed this kind of inadvertent attention from him. It was a fixation and desire of some sort, which was undeniable for you both and it made you feel wanted and desirable.

Unfortunately for you though, his interest in you grew to a point where he noticed everything, but not in the way you had expected. He noticed the changes in your behaviour when you were around him and he noticed that, during the past few days, you had been standing up to James who, as usual, was criticising you for not wanting to go out partying with him.

Then, on Tuesday morning, when you arrived at school, Cillian also unfortunately noticed some bruises on your face and wrists which, despite your best efforts to hide them, you could not.

You had already taken a day off because of them but, since you needed to comply with your scholarship conditions, another day of leave was not an option for you without a medical certificate.

“What the fuck happened to you?” Cillian thus asked pretty much as soon you walked into the lecture hall before anyone else had even arrived yet. You had ballet practice at seven o’clock that morning and were early as usual.

“Nothing, I just fell” you lied, not wanting to tell him the truth.

“You fell? How?” he enquired, not believing a word you had just said to him.

“When dancing. Don’t worry. I am fine” you reassured him while, the truth was, that you were far from being fine. You were hurt, upset and scared.

The bruises were not the result of an accident during your routine at all but rather the wilful act of your very own boyfriend. It was not the first time he had done this and you knew that it would not be the last. James had hit you in a drunken state after he found out that, during the break you took from each other, you slept with another man.  

Whilst he did not know who the man was, he knew that he was much older than you and this bothered him. It was something your friend Lorraine had told him after Lorraine and you had a fight the day prior. She thus broke your trust and her promise to secrecy, accusing you of getting involved with a stranger at a bar who was twice your age.

With that knowledge, and in a rather drunken state, James did the unthinkable to you. He hit you across the face and called you a whore before threatening you if you ever thought to leave him again.

“I am not an idiot Y/N. I know what these bruises are. They aren’t the result of an accident” Cillian told you but you did not want to talk about it any further.

“Please Cillian. I am fine. This is none of your business” you told him but Cillian would not let it go.

“James did this to you, didn’t he?” he asked, causing you to sigh. “You need to report him” he then went on to say, but you shook your head.

“No. I can’t. You wouldn’t understand” you said just before a few students walked into the room, interrupting your private conversation.

“Let’s talk later, alright?” Cillian then asked and you nodded before getting yourself another coffee from the cafeteria.

Two hours later…

While Cillian thought about you and pondered about what happened between you and James and why, after all this, you would be staying with him, he knew that he had to concentrate on class. He had to focus and put his mind at ease which, in the end, he did.

He continued with the curriculum as planned and literally none of the students were prepared for what he had in store for them that day, including you.

“Now that everyone has been assigned an individualised role to work on with me in a one on one lesson, we will also be working on a character role in a group scenario. Every student will perform the exact same scene and I can tell you that it will be a challenging one” Cillian said to the class as he was introducing a new play to his lessons.

“You will each be given a partner to act out this scene and the point of this exercise is for you to learn how to improvise on stage. You will each only get thirty minutes to rehearse and this means that, whilst you need to try and remember your lines in a short amount of time, I do not care much about how accurate your repetition of the lines is when you are in front of an audience. So long as you play the part and improvise, you will be fine…alright….” Cillian went on to say before explaining that, in the end of your subject, and after you have been assessed on both performances separately, namely this one and your individualised one, you will be writing an essay, comparing both roles and experiences.

“Does this make sense guys?” Cillian then asked and, after everyone nodded, he carried on.

“Good. Now, since we have an uneven number of students in this class, I will be participating too and, unfortunately for the person paired with me, we will be going first” Cillian announced before asking Lorraine to come up and assist him with the drawing of names, noting that the couples were to be selected at random from a large plastic bowl filled with snippets of paper, each containing one name.

“Yes, of course, Mr Murphy, but only if I can role play with you“ Lorraine teased in the most seductive way possible, causing you to cringe and Cillian to furrow his eyebrows.

“Trust me Lorraine, you don’t want me as your partner for this exercise. It will be much easier with a fellow student” Cillian told her almost sternly, but she would not relent.

“Well, doesn’t that depend on the kind of exercise and role play you want us to partake in? I mean, none of us know what the scene will be yet and, for all I know, it could be rather kinky” Lorraine then joked but Cillian did not appear to be amused.

“Moving on…” Cillian thus gestured and, with that, Lorraine adjusted her tight skirt and walked up towards Cillian in order to help him with the draw.

Unlike her, you hoped that your name would be drawn with someone other than Cillian (or James for that matter) and, when you heard James’s name come up first, your heart began to pound rapidly. He was your boyfriend, yes, but he was also a terrible actor who, just two days ago, had hit you across the face, causing you to break up with him once more. Plus, he most certainly did not take this unit seriously and this, too, bothered you more than a little considering the effort you had put into your education.

Luckily for you however, and unfortunately for Lorraine, she was paired with James as her name was called out second in line and even Cillian’s sense of relief was obvious to you when Lorraine pulled her own name from the hat. He was becoming annoyed by her constant sexual advances towards him and so was the remainder of the class. They were appalled and, ever since your fight, her behaviour had gotten worse.

Then, a few more names were called out until, eventually, your name was drawn and written on to the chalk board by Cillian.

“And Y/N will be paired with…” Lorraine began to say after discarding the piece of paper with your name on it and reaching for another.

She unfolded it slowly and then sighed with frustration. “Cillian” she sighed and your heart sank into the ground. Ideally, you wanted to request a redraw but you knew that, if you were to request such redraw, you would be looking like a fool. So, you remained silent until all the names had been drawn.

“Great, now teams, you have thirty minutes to learn and rehearse your lines and, if you forget some of them, don’t worry. The play is a difficult one and I want to see you come up with some improvisation skills on stage. This is what acting is all about” Cillian explained and, when you read through the script he had handed out to you and the rest of the class, you realised that this was a play you were familiar with. You had read it before, more than once. It was a piece that fascinated you. It was one of your favourites and made you smile.

The play was called “Yerma” and had been written by the Spanish dramatist Federico García Lorca. It was written in 1934 and first performed that same year. It was a tragic poem in which a woman by the name of Yerma had to deal with the inability to conceive a child with her husband Juan, in this case portrayed by Cillian, after he had prompted you take on the role of Yerma herself.

 Since the play was dealing with the themes of infertility, isolation, passion, and frustration, you knew that your character was a difficult one to portray. It was all about showing Yerma’s emotions while taking into account the underlying themes of nature, marriage, jealousy, and friendship.

It was intense and you knew that acting this scene out with Cillian could become somewhat problematic.

“How is this not going to be awkward?” you whispered to him as, just like the others, Cillian approached you and sat down with you, one on one, to rehearse your lines.

“It won’t be if you just focus on your character, I promise” Cillian then said reassuringly and, much to his surprise, you turned over the script and began raddling down the lines.

The act he had chosen was the final act of the play where Yerma kills her husband and you already knew how it panned out.

“You know the lines?” Cillian asked surprised as you spoke them quickly, causing you to nod.

“I read that play over and over again a few years ago when I was going through some things. It is an amazing piece of writing and it is one of my favourite plays” you told him and he was clearly impressed by the fact that you knew about it.

“Did you ever see it being performed?” Cillian then asked and you nodded again.

“Yes. But only through a stream online” you told him while you already knew what he was about to say next. He wanted you to show your emotions, in front of the entire class and you were afraid to do so.

“Right, then put some emotion into your performance Y/N. You can do it. I know you can” Cillian reassured you and you tried it again, and again until, eventually, you got there in the end and he pulled you up on stage.

Of course, just as you were standing in front of the class with him, your nervousness sat in and when you heard James and Lorraine giggle in the background, you felt sick to the core and immediately forgot your very first line.

“Breathe and forget about them. I can hear them too, but I choose to ignore them. You can do it too” Cillian whispered so that only you could hear him before addressing the class once more, asking them to be quiet while you performed this scene with him.

The scene began near a hermitage high in the mountains, a place to which many barren women, including Yerma, had made a pilgrimage. Young men were there too, hoping to father a child or to win a woman away from their husbands and your respective dialogues began just after an old woman told your character Yerma to leave her husband Juan and take up a relationship with her son instead.

But, in this scene, Yerma held on to her sense of honour and dismissed that thought which was something her husband Juan overheard. Juan then told his wife to give up wanting a child and to be content with what she had.

***Start of Scene***

 Cillian: This is your last chance to resist this continual lament for shadowy things, outside existence, for things that are lost in the breeze.

Y/N (with dramatic astonishment): Outside existence you say? Lost in the breeze, you say?

Cillian: Things which haven’t happened and neither you nor I can control.

Y/N (violently and filled with anger): Go on, go on!

Cillian (emotionally and upset): For things that don’t’ matter. Do you hear? That have no importance to me. That’s what I had to say to you. What matters to me is what I can hold in my hands, what I can see with my eyes.

Y/N (falling to her knees, desperately): That’s it. That’s it. That’s what I wanted to hear from your mouth. Truth is not felt when it’s inside oneself, but how vast it is, how loud it cries, when it emerges, and raises its arms! It’s doesn’t matter! Now, I’ve heard you!

Cillian (approaching you and embracing you in order to help you rise): Think that it had to be so. Listen to me. Many women would be happy to live your life. Life is sweeter without children. I’m happy without them. It’s not your fault.

Y/N: What did you seek in me, then?

Cillian: Yourself.

Y/N (excitedly): You wanted a home, tranquillity and a woman. But nothing more. Is that true?

Cillian: It’s true. As everyone else does.

Y/N: And the rest? Your son?

Cillian (firmly): Didn’t you hear, it doesn’t matter! Don’t ask me again! Do I have to shout it in your ear so you can understand, and live peacefully for once!

Y/N (pulling Cillian onto the ground): And you’ve never thought about it even when you could see I wanted one?

Cillian: Never.

Y/N: I’m not to hope for one?

Cillian (before embracing you): No. But we shall be living peacefully. Both of us: in gentleness and friendship. Embrace me!

Y/N: What do you want?

Cillian: I want you. In the moonlight you are beautiful.

Y/N (crying): You want me as if you were wanting a pigeon to eat.

Cillian: Kiss me…like this.

Y/N (before grasping Cillian by his throat and acting out his death and then your own): No! Never! I’ll sleep, without waking with a start to see if my blood announces new blood. With a body barren forever. 

Y/N (addressing the audience in tears): What do you want? Don’t come near me: because I’ve murdered my child! I’ve killed my own son!

 ***End of Scene***

 Just as you finished the scene with only some minor improvisation on your part, Cillian glanced at you with surprise. The way you portrayed Yerma was incredible and it took you a little moment to snap out of your character again.

You were well and truly surprised by your own abilities and, for a short moment, you were lost for words until reality sank back in and you heard them again.

James and Lorraine were giggling still while Cillian addressed the class and thanked you for your performance.

“Jesus Christ Y/N! This was intense. I am surprised you didn’t just make out with our lecturer on stage. So inappropriate” Lorraine teased, causing James too laugh. “I would call this sexual harassment Mr Murphy” he said, trying to annoy you and causing Cillian to cock an eyebrow.

“Do you guys have anything of value to add, perhaps? Because, if you do not, then I would like to move on without any further interruptions from you” Cillian then said, causing Lorraine to flinch and James to laugh.

“Should I be jealous of our lecturer Y/N?” James teased, seeing that Lorraine had turned quiet now rather quickly. “I mean, clearly, he was holding back a little when he told you to kiss and embrace him. Maybe he fucking wants you and, knowing what I know now, you probably like him too. He is old enough to spark your interest, isn’t he? Twice your age, just like that dude you hooked up with a few weeks ago? Bloody disgusting” James said as you sat back down in front of him and, by this point, you were well and truly fuming with anger.

“Shut up James. I was doing what we are meant to do. We are here to learn how to perform on stage but all you do is act like a little brat. Because that is what you are, a spoiled little child” you spat so that at least half of the class could hear you, including Cillian.

“Oh, I act like a child now, do I?” James asked. He was angered. Very angered. “You just fucking cried like a baby about some stupid play while hitting on our lecturer like a slut” he then laughed, referencing your tears on stage and, luckily for you, Cillian heard everything what was said.

“James, enough. What is going on?” he asked sternly, wanting to pull James aside to tell him off.

“Nothing. I am just having a word with my girlfriend” James explained but you were emotionally drained and rather upset by this point.

“I am not your girlfriend anymore” you reminded him but James shook his head.

“We will see about that” he told you and, again, you sighed with anger.

“No James. I done with this. I am fucking done with you. No matter what you do I am fucking done” you said quietly but sternly and James quickly took hold of your wrist before pressing down on it harshly.

“No you are not done with me” he spat. “You always come crawling back to me because you have no other choice. Just remember that” he then went on to say while you tried to pull away from him, which is also when Cillian intervened.

“Enough James! Let go of her arm! Now!” Cillian said as he approached James who quickly retreated from you.

“Alright man, here…I won’t touch her again. She is a fucking whore anyway” James chuckled and, by this point, Cillian had enough and asked him to leave the class room with him.

“Come with me James” he ordered while waiting for him with his arms crossed.

“No” James responded bluntly but Cillian would not and did not relent.

“You either come with me now or I will call security. Behaviour like this is intolerable and needs to be addressed by the board. Now stand up and move” Cillian said, forcing James to follow him while giving the other students a break and telling them to keep rehearsing their lines.

***

With James gone and the likelihood of him being temporarily expelled from school over his conduct in class, Cillian postponed the remainder of the lecture until tomorrow while dealing with some administerial concerns.

Not only did he have to write a report about James and his conduct in class, but also did he have to speak with you and the student counsellor about the possibility of you bringing assault charges against him.

Knowing what you have been through in the past however, Cillian was aware of the fact that you might not like to speak with the counsellors at the school and, thus, he gave you the opportunity to speak with him first, in private.

With that in mind, you walked to his office after the lecture had been postponed and just as he opened the door and you entered the room, you broke out in tears.

“I am so sorry. I feel like a fool” you said while, somewhat inappropriately, Cillian took you into his arms, embracing you in a tight hug.

“So, you feel like a fool?” Cillian asked while holding you tight. “It should be James who feels like a fool, not you. You did nothing wrong” Cillian then told you and you pulled away from him, simply just to look him into his eyes.

“No, it is me. I am acting like a fool. I should not have gone back to him after what he did to me. It wasn’t then first time his hand slipped and, to tell you the truth, I am just used to being treated like this” you told Cillian who used his thumbs to wipe away your tears.

“No one should treat you like this. You are a strong woman and should stand up for yourself” Cillian then said while gently brushing over your bruises and you nodded reluctantly in response.

“Is he being expelled?” you then asked and Cillian sighed, seeing that you still cared about James.

“That depends on what I write in my report” Cillian told you before asking you what it was that you wanted him to write.

“He went through a lot as well. He’s been through therapy and all…” you began to explain to Cillian who interrupted you quickly.

“There is no excuse for his behaviour. I know that you love him, but he cannot treat you like this. He is being abusive and it needs to stop. You are a smart woman and surely you can see that he is hurting you” Cillian lectured you and you were quick to respond.

“I do not love him Cillian. I haven’t loved him for a long time but he is fucking obsessed with me and has threatened me many times” you said and Cillian queried your use of the word “threat”.

“Threatening you with what?” he asked and you turned silent again before taking in a deep breath and telling him everything.

“Violence. Exposing things that I have done and exposing pictures he has of me. Many things really” you told him but Cillian still believed that you should report his abusive behaviour to the school board as well as the police.

“Maybe one day I will, but not now” you told Cillian just as you heard a knock on the door to his office.

“Mr Murphy? It’s Janice, the school counsellor. I have been told that there was an incident in class with a male student attacking one of the female students” she blurted out from outside the door and, just as you were ready to leave, Cillian opened the door and allowed the counsellor to come inside.

“Is this the student?” was what she asked right of the bat when she saw you and, just as Cillian confirmed this to be the case, you spoke up.

“I am but I am not in need of counselling” you told her sternly before informing her that you already spoke to Cillian about the incident and have asked him to file a report on your behalf.

“Alright then, but if you change your mind, this is my number” Janice told you while handing you her business card and you took it quickly, shuffed it into your back and then said goodbye to Cillian and her.

The following two days…

Following numerous calls from James and messages containing both threats and apologies, he was expelled from school while the board began their investigations into the incident.

Just as you allowed it to happen, Cillian filed the report following your ex-boyfriend’s behaviour in class and this was enough for the dean to formerly remove him from all lectures and workshops on campus.

He was not allowed to come near you when you were on school premises but, since you did not have an apprehensive violence order against him, nothing prevented him from rocking up at your house.

Thus, just as you got home on Wednesday night, you found a note from him under the door with yet another threat and another apology and whilst you did not think anything about his somewhat obnoxious behaviour, nothing could prepare you for what you were about to wake up to the following morning.

The next morning, just after Emma had left the house in order to attend a three-day conference in Cork, you looked at your phone and were shocked to see that you had received over twenty notifications, being both calls and messages across all of your social media accounts.

You opened them all, one by one, to see what was going on and there it was. The unthinkable. A picture of you from two years ago which James took without your knowledge.

You were completely naked, laying on his bed in a compromising position and literally every inch of your body was visible to everyone who received this photograph.

To be continued…

Please comment and engage. I love getting comments and predictions pretty please!

Tag List

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#cillian murphy #cillian murphy fanfic #cillian murphy fanfiction #cillian murphy smut #cillian fanfic #cillian murphy x you #cillian murphy x reader #cillian murphy x y/n #cillian murphy x oc

[xpoisoned-stardustx]

THE SHOWS ARE HOLDING BACK!!!

Tw: mentions of sewer-slide, mentions of mental illness, mentions of trauma (I’m just putting this here for cautions)

And by that I mean holding back on angst

I’m not just talking about TSAMS or TLAES, I’m talkin’ ALL SHOWS (granted, i haven’t watched all of the recent show things but I do know they haven’t been to angst)

Now, you might think, “oh stardust, but we’ve had lots of angst! I mean think of Cassie on TRWAGS-“

Yeah, Cassie, the only one who has recently had a lot of angst, and it was only really her being mad her phone wasn’t working and talking a bit about her dad (im not including The Musical btw). I also feel like we should’ve had a lot more Gregory angst after Rocky’s death. I mean Gregory blamed himself for that, it wouldn’t just go away. And Circus Baby should be had more angst after Gregory almost frickin died!!! The characters recover so quickly and just go back to their goofy normal lives. Obviously I won’t cover everything for these shows but some of my main thoughts.

“uh but what about Glamrock Chica on TFFAGCS?”

Not. Enough. Glamrock Chica was easily back to normal after blaming herself for their whole issue because of stuff out of her control, having an exstistential crisis after being kicked out of the PizzaPlex, getting a message from her parents she doesn’t remember and so on. Also if ANYONE is getting angst it should be Funtime Foxy and his brother. Funtime Foxy almost drowned when he was around 10, Fexy (the brother) tried to stab FT.Foxy while screaming “THIS IS MY BODY, I WANT IT BACK” because they were in the same body at some point, he and his brother burned their house down because when FT.Foxy was running away from his brother they knocked over candles, then his brother literally tried to commit s—-ide by not leaving the burning building and saying “if I can’t have this I’d rather die” so FT.Foxy had to drag him out the house, then Fexy got sent to a mental hospital/asylum/psych ward (idk which one exactly) and lots of other things. And we haven’t seen ANY Lolbit angst whatsoever. Don’t even get me started on Mangle or Ray. (You can just tell this is my favourite show, can’t you?)

“…uhhh TFAFFS??”

Tbh I don’t watch that one alot but FT.Freddy Deffinetly has abondonment issues, as far as I know we never find out where that came from, Shadow Freddy had a bit of angst, Freddy is doing loads of things that I’m not bothered to say and ‘The Evil Gang’ or whatever their name is are another case of ‘comic relief villains’ I think.

“TLAES or TSAMS?????”

I already posted about this by rebloggin soemthing but ‘Sun gets Therapy’ was so disappointing, Lunar acts like things are normal, I feel like Solar should be seeing things after killing his Moon because as the Old Moon said “when you kill someone, they’re not there, but you can see them” or something like that, Moon just screams and gets mad at people for angst and he did apologise to Monty and have that whole “I’m a loser blah blah blah” but that’s it, Sun is hiding ALOT and other things.

“but TMGAFS has alot of angst”

which is why it’s my second favourite show. I’m just sad Foxy said him and Monty are more acquaintances than friends :(… I respect that show. If anyone else wants to criticise the angst there, be my guest.

Anyways I’m just rambling here. I’m gonna go listen to the entire C.C.C.C. album again, toodles.

#tffagcs #tsams #tfaffs #trwags #tcahs #tlaes #tcbagfs #tmgafs #ffagcs #sams #faffs #RWAGS #cahs #laes #cbagfs #mgafs #sun and moon show #the sun and moon show #lunar and earth show #the lunar and earth show #freddy and funtime freddy show #the Freddy and Funtime Freddy show #tsbs #the security breach show #the security breach shows #the Funtime foxy and Glamrock Chica Show #funtime foxy and glamrock chica show #roxanne wolf and gregory show #the Roxanne wolf and Gregory show #cassie and helpi show

[almondbiscotti]

Hard Knocks

Jan 2021. Possibly my favourite. So far.

I barely remember life before they came, unannounced, stomping through my front door, deliberately intrusive and demanding my attention. I tried everything to keep them out, I changed the locks, I added new locks, moved across the city, and even changed my name. But they are persistent, and they do not need to know my name to find me.

Monday is the loudest of them all. Blue like the ocean and dark as a storm. She ate everything I had in the pantry and terrified my neighbours. I wish she wouldn’t ask me questions I cannot answer. What is your fancy arts degree worth, inflation adjusted? Does your boss hate you? How many Zoom meetings can you take before you go clinically insane? I pretend I can’t see or hear her but she is too unpleasant to ignore. Her visits are the worst. I think she knows, and she enjoys my suffering.

Tuesday is best friends with Monday. They say they’re close, but I have never seen them in a room together. She says little but sits at my table and makes lists, things to do and groceries to buy. Lists I find scattered in random corners of my apartment, her reminders of how I have failed to live up to her expectations. I am more at ease when she leaves. If looks could kill, Tuesday kills me every week.

Wednesday is a depressing shell of a man. He is the only one that knocks, 3 listless taps even when the door is open. He leaves me alone mostly, crying silently on the couch. Sometimes he sighs loudly and sneaks furtive glances at me. Once he sang a song and I threw my cup at him. Nobody likes Wednesday and he only has himself to blame.

Thursday bursts in like the sun. She brings me flowers and fruit and nags when I skip lunch. She makes good Bolognese, and we watch re-runs of The Nanny till I fall asleep. When I wake, she is gone and all I can smell is the faint scent of rain and freedom.

Friday visits when the sun sets. He drinks endlessly and wears nothing but black. He drags me out and insists on introducing me to women. I secretly wish I was Friday, Friday could sell ice to an Eskimo. I wake just past midnight to pounding on the door and in my head. I open the door to a smiling Friday with a bloody, unconscious Saturday slung over his shoulder. I feel the back of my head throb and taste iron when I swallow.

Saturday is exhausted, beaten senseless by Friday. I crawl into bed with him and wish we were both dead.

I clean the house of Saturday’s blood and vomit while Sunday lazes and watches. Sunday says he’s a God-fearing Christian and observes the 7th day of rest. He tuts while I do the laundry, pointing out unmovable stains and criticises my choice of detergent. Sunday reminds me of Monday.

At night I lie in bed, hating Sunday for leaving me. The seconds drip away, and I know when I open my eyes, Monday will be here with her questions.

#Nessa Writes

[everythingroyalty]

Of course Royal fucking Central is the breeding ground for an article so half-assed that Sofia’s completely harmless answer immediately is misconstrued into a dig at Meghan 🙄

#r*yal c*ntral proving ONCE AGAIN that 'journalist' is not a protected title #hope the traffic was worth losing whatever credibility y'all had left 😘✌️ #text #hot take: r*yal c*ntral's articles on non-british royals should come with a preface that they're pretty much just google translations #at this point i simply can't imagine they aren't #they just pass on with NO context or critical thinking whatsoever #i've had them on my shit list since 2018 when they essentially just copy-pasted a danish tabloid clickbait article after henrik's death #just uncritically passing on a right-wing politician's self-serving holier than thou condolence post #then they did that article on mary’s handshake blunder where they not only straight up misreported the incident #because newsflash she WAS NOT supposed to wear a face mask outside #checking literally any of our government guidelines would’ve told you this but i guess it’s easier to just google translate the ig post #thus COMPLETELY missing the point and passing on inaccurate information #but they also managed to make it sound like she was very nearly crucified for it in the danish press #which AGAIN is just forwarding clickbaity tabloid headlines #i wouldn’t even go as far as saying she was even criticised – it was pointed out and everyone agreed it was unfortunate #THAT'S IT #and now this #if i were sofia i'd simply sue them :)

[no-reply95]

I'm a new mclennon fan and I'd like to ask what to make of paul's interview in 2012 denying that john was obsessed with him yet

Hi anon, thanks for the ask :)

I’m not 100% sure what interview you’re referring to but I’m gonna guess that, based on the year, it’s the interview Paul did with Howard Stern, shortly after John Lennon: The Life, by Philip Norman, was released. If you’re referring to a different interview please specify in a subsequent ask and I’ll respond on that basis!

The interview with Howard Stern can be seen here for anyone who hasn’t seen it before.

Firstly, I think the way Stern approaches the topic with Paul destroys any chance for Paul to address this topic in any meaningful way. First off, he asks Paul if he’s ever slept with a man before, he says it in a jokey way but still, it’s likely Paul would have had his defences up at that stage, then he goes on to say that a new book about John has come out, before trailing off as Paul goes on to criticise books in the past that have included rumours about John’s (and maybe by extension his own) sexuality. Paul’s defence is that none of these authors knew John, unlike him, and that there was ample opportunity for John to have revealed his homosexuality to Paul over the course of their friendship, so since that never happened, John can’t have been gay.

Putting aside Paul’s faulty rationalisations regarding the questioning of John’s sexuality (hey he never propositioned me so how could he have been gay???) the particular rumour included in John Lennon The Life isn’t purported to originate from Philip Norman himself (who didn’t have a personal relationship with John) it originated from Yoko, who of course did. The quote from the book is as follows:

"Indeed, John's anger was more that of an ex-spouse than ex-colleague, reinforcing a suspicion already in Yoko's mind that his feelings for Paul had been far more intense than the world at large had ever guessed. From chance remarks he had made, she gathered there had even been a moment when—on the principle that bohemians should try everything—he had contemplated an affair with Paul, but had been deterred by Paul's immovable heterosexuality. Nor, apparently, was Yoko the only one to have picked up on this. Around Apple, in her hearing, Paul would sometimes be called John's Princess"

The quote from the book isn’t directly from Yoko’s mouth, due to the legal issues between Yoko and Norman around the book’s release, so we don’t know how Yoko phrased her suspicions to Norman, only that she did. Had Stern framed the discussion of John’s sexuality as something being questioned by Yoko, Paul wouldn’t have been able to use the “they didn’t know John” defence, he would have had to reckon with the fact that someone who knew John, even more intimately than he did, had cause to question his identification/idealisation as a heterosexual man. Instead Paul pretty reflexively bats away the discussion, without properly engaging with it.

In short, Stern fumbled the bag. He had the best shot that anyone has ever had to have a, somewhat, open conversation with Paul regarding John’s sexuality and he let it become yet another case of Paul vs Beatles authors claiming to know John and his relationship to John better than him, of course he’s going to be defensive, especially when the author in question was Norman, the man behind Shout, which was the foundation scripture for Paul’s reputation diving into the toilet post John’s murder.

Stern also zeroes in on a claim that Paul used John’s attraction to him as a means to manipulate him (I haven’t read the book so no idea if that’s a Norman invention or something that’s substantiated by Yoko or someone else) but again, at that point, no matter what Stern raises, because it’s all coming from one of the dreaded Beatle authors, Paul isn’t going to engage in a conversation that substantiates any of their claims, least of all on a topic as sensitive as sexuality. As a result of this, I don’t really take much from what he said personally.

#the beatles #paul mccartney #john lennon #john and paul #mclennon #philip norman #asks

[extremelyblackandwhite]

falling.

pairing: carter baizen x reader

warnings: angst, cheating (sorta?)

part 1 / part 2

and it kills me 'cause i know we've run out of things we can say. what am i now? what am i now? what if i'm someone i don't want around? i'm falling again, i'm falling again, i'm falling. what if i'm down? what if i’m out? what if i'm someone you won't talk about? i'm falling again, i'm falling again, i'm falling and i get the feeling that you'll never need me again ...

Stay away from me. I don’t want to see your face.

Those words were burned and scarred onto his mind and no matter how much he drank, how much he smoked, how much he slept, he could still hear her voice echoing those same words which hit him like daggers. She’d meant those words, he knew her well enough to know when she meant something and she had meant every single letter of every single word she had muttered. He couldn’t escape them and the worse thing was, he couldn’t escape her face. He hadn’t seen her in the last three months but he couldn’t forget the look on her face, the look of disappointment and hurt. He was used to disappointing his family, that’s all he could do but he’d never disappointed her before. She’d been upset at him, he’d been upset at her but they’d never been disappointed at each other. They’d always been there for each other but now she was just gone and he daren’t even try approaching her. He knew her threats weren’t empty and he knew way too well not to mess with Y/N. She was sweet but at the end of the day she was a Vanderbilt heiress and if you got on her bad side, you could easily see it. Yet, that didn’t mean he didn’t miss her.

How could he not when she had been around since the very moment they were introduced for each other? He couldn’t really explain what they were and he didn’t want to dwell on it, he’d rather think to himself that she was gone rather than admit he was the one responsible for it. After all, wasn’t that what he always did? Run away from his problems and avoiding them, instead creating even more issues. It was easier after all. However, what he did not expect was to find her doing the exact same and he couldn’t help but admit how angry he was to see her with someone else. At Cotillion, with Chuck, it was easy to know it was nothing; after all, everyone with a pair of eyes knew all Chuck Bass was interested in was Blair and once Nate was off the picture, the two immediately became a thing. But now? Now he couldn’t convince himself of it, he couldn’t tell himself that she was trying to make him jealous as she stepped into a MET exhibition accompanied by someone whom he didn’t know. A Kennedy, he had heard, and how could Carter compete with a Kennedy? He could not but seeing his Y/N with someone else made his blood boil and his grip tight around the champagne glass. Clearly he had forgotten he was here with someone else as well, yet, that didn’t mattered. What mattered was that his Y/N was with someone else. 

He hadn’t even want to come to this exhibition in the first place, he’d even tried to argue it out with Serena yet it was no use, he was here now and he could see it; he could see them. He could see the man pointing to his Y/N introducing her to everyone in the room as if she didn’t already know them. And that smile, that smile that always got him to do anything she wanted. A smile that was for him no longer yet looked his way and faltered. He downed the cold champagne in his glass, staring back at her before she moved her gaze away, hand wrapped around her date’s arm. Carter shoved the champagne glass on one of the floating silver trays before making his way through the crowd like a wolf hunting its sheep until she reached her. Whomever she was with had left her alone, probably to get some drinks but he didn’t care.

      - We need to talk. 

      - No, we do not. - she grabbed a canape from a passing tray, a habit she had whenever she was uncomfortable at parties. 

      - Can you at least give me that? You ruined my family’s appearances at social events, you made your point. You owe me a talk.

      - That’s rich. - she looked over her shoulder, hoping her date would come and interrupt their interaction. 

      - Please. - his eyes scanned hers for any softness which still laid for him, yet he couldn’t read her eyes. They were hooded and hidden by thick black shadow and dark eyeliner which took away from how watery and bright they usually were, from how happy he remembered them. It’d been a long, long three months and part of him hopped all the care she had once held from him hadn’t died. He still held her in high regard and while he didn’t expect her for even care for him anymore, part of him still hoped she wouldn’t let him bleed out if she found him wounded. However, Y/N was much too smart to let her own emotions take over her in public situations and so she walked away.

Her gown dragged away all her insecurities and all the faltering which still seemed to dance around her whenever he was around, yards and yards of fabric dragged all that was bubbling all the way to her throat and she found herself walking faster and faster to the bathroom. Her hands flew to the porcelain sink, holding herself up as if the weight of all she had ignored for the past three months was pushing her down into the centre of the Earth. Her head snapped up, watching her reflection in the golden mirror; she thought maybe if she could see how pathetic she looked, she would snap out of it. 

     - Y/N. - her grip on the porcelain tightened up as she turned her head to see him against the closed door.

     - I hate you. - she almost barked those words at him, voice filled with poison as if she had wanted to say them a long time ago. His eyes softened, corners looking down, a far cry from how unreadable he always was. - With every fibre of my being, I hate you. 

     - Fine. - he made his way towards her, standing by her side. - I just wanted to say that I’m sorry I hurt you. I never meant to hurt you.

     - You humiliated me in front of everyone. - her eyes looked into his for the first time that night, old wounds still not completely wounded. - You kissed me in Santorini when you were with Serena. You are a bad person, Carter. 

     - I know but I wasn’t with her like I was with you.

     - Details of your relationship do not interest me, Carter. If you wanna talk about your relationship, I’d suggest couples therapy. 

     - We weren’t a couple in Santorini, Y/N. Did you seriously think I would’ve done that to you?

     - I don’t know you. - she spewed those words, letting go of the sink and walking backwards, away from him. - I don’t even trust you, Carter.

     - I hope you know I’m not asking for forgiveness from you. I’m just apologising. 

     - I don’t need your apology, I need you away from me. I want you away from me.   

     - You’re spoiled, you know that? - he pointed his finger at her. - Just because the whole world revolves around your family does not mean I’ll stop going places just because you don’t want to see me. You don’t get to decide what I do!

    - For someone who hates this lifestyle, you seem so bothered. - she stood there, not completely happy with the adjective he’d just placed upon her. Y/N Archibald was many things, but spoiled was not one of them. No matter how many riches she had, she did not expect the world to bend to her will.  - Why are you here if you’re just going to criticise me anyway? 

The two of them remained in that match, almost to see which one of them could hurt the one the most, as if hurting each other would somehow make the fact they weren’t together hurt any less. The truth was, both of them were stubborn individuals and while Y/N had been the most forgiving of the two, seeing the man she had always hoped would someday be hers with someone else had almost erased all of that. Maybe she was spoiled for expecting him to someday magically want her by his side but he was spoiled too. They were two flawed human beings staring each other, waiting to see which one would break apart first until he realised one thing; he did not want to see her break apart. He was bitter, angry at her even but deep down he knew there was no one to be angry at but himself. He had caused this and he was lashing out at her, hoping that by hurting her, he’d feel better about her hating him so much. However, he did not want to hurt her. At least no more than he’d already done, either willingly or unwillingly. 

    - You win. - he lowered down his hands in defeat. Y/N, however remained still yet if one were to touch her arm, they could feel she was trembling. - I can’t fight with you any longer.

He almost left her there standing, not sure of what to say. He really was going to leave, he was going to disappear for a while yet his decision faltered as his eyes almost too quickly scanned her, noticing the thin gold bracelet around her wrist. He had given her that bracelet, something he’d got from one of his first travels to Europe. It was nothing too special, in all honesty, compared to what she was wearing, it was probably the cheapest thing she had on her person but he remembered that bracelet way too well. He remembered giving her the small little bag, her little argument about how he shouldn’t have gotten something for her, how she promised she’d never take it off. She still had it, she still wore it. 

     - You’re wearing the bracelet I gave you. - he pointed towards her wrist and she immediately covered it, looking at it for a bit before looking up at him.

     - Fine. - her voice almost broke as she tried to undo the clasp.

     - Don’t. - his voice however broke down as she found the clasp. - You promised. 

Her aura softened, shoulders lowering to a neutral position as her hand unwrapped from her wrist, her eyes gazing the shiny gold metal before she looked up and at him. Whatever fire her anger had ignited within her went down, washed away like the waves onto the sand and for the first time she moved forward until she was close enough to feel his breathe on her face. Her eyes heightened up to his, lips half parted as her hands cupped his face, the same face she had seen grow older over these years yet remain the same blue eyes which were so typically his. Her finger grazed his cheekbone, the mere action making him nuzzle his face against her warm. She always had warm hands and the both of them no longer wanted to fight. She was tired and Carter was deadly afraid of not ever talking to her again, he could not lose her. He did not want to lose her. 

There was no sound, not even the soft music outside seemed to break the silence, all that was around was their breathing, soft and slow. Her eyes moved from his to his lips, pink tinted, tainted with the taste of champagne which she could smell from his breathe. Soft emotion filled eyes looked his for a second before she moved closer, closing the distance between them. Her hands moved from his chest to rest against his chest as she tasted the champagne on his lips. His hands held her waist flush to him, before he two broke off the kiss, foreheads leaned against each other.

    - Don’t leave.

#sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan/reader #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan/you #sebastian stan x y/n #sebastian stan/y/n #sebastian stan imagine #bucky #bucky x reader #bucky/reader #bucky x y/n #bucky/y/n #bucky/you #bucky x you #bucky imagine #carter baizen #carter baizen x you #carter baizen/you #carter baizen x y/n #carter baizen/y/n #carter baizen x reader #carter baizen/reader #carter baizen imagine

[sankyeom]

i spy with my little eye | l.jy

pairings: lee juyeon x reader (she/her/hers pronouns) genre: spy au, rivals to lovers warnings: some descriptions of fighting, injuries, explosives, and guns summary: in which the company you work for is the main rival of juyeon’s company, and you’re known for always being one step ahead of him; even when it comes to realising his feelings for you (based on this timestamp that i wrote before the stealer came out) word count: 8.3k series: sankyeom’s 2k followers celebration

masterlist

“I hope you understand how important it is that we get our hands on that file,” your boss, Mrs Kwon, explained to you after briefing you on your next mission. Your agency was the leading organisation in espionage, amassing over 30 countries. “The encryption on it is extremely advanced, so we’ll need it back undamaged so our cyber division can recover the files,” she finished, closing her tablet and glancing at you. “My understanding is that CKR have their best agents on the job as we speak.”

You nodded, “I’m familiar with them,” you told your boss, having come across the agents from CKR on several occasions, especially Juyeon. “They won’t be a problem.”

Your boss gave you a curt nod in agreement, handing her tablet off to her assistant. “You must know how important this is, Y/n. I cannot stress it enough. I chose you for this mission because you have proven yourself to be loyal and competent after the three years you’ve been here. I trust you to complete your mission well; this cannot fall into the wrong hands.”

“I understand,” you assured your boss. “I won’t give anybody the chance.”

“That’s what I like to hear,” Mrs Kwon nodded. “Now, the gala is starting in six hours. I suggest you stop by costume and weaponry before you go. We wouldn’t you to stand out or be unprepared.”

You paused for a moment, thinking it over. “Maybe that’s exactly what we want…” you trailed off as you exited your boss’s office and made your way to the costume department.

You had purposefully made contact with the head of governmental cyber security multiple weeks prior to the gala. Knowing that he had the key to hacking into governmental firewalls and protections meant that you couldn’t let it slip through your fingers that night.

Mr Kim had recognised you immediately, since your stunning red outfit couldn’t be missed. You had clearly made the right decision to wear it, because Mr Kim couldn’t keep his eyes off of you the whole evening.  

“Do you have eyes on the target?” Sangyeon’s voice rang through Juyeon’s earpiece. Juyeon had been undercover for the duration of the gala that evening, staying low-key in a formal but simple suit in order to blend in with the crowd. Sangyeon was surveilling from a getaway car parked nearby for a quick exit. Not only was Sangyeon the team leader, he was also their best and most efficient driver.

As subtly as possible, Juyeon placed a hand on his earpiece to reply to his team leader. “Affirmative. Exiting main ballroom through the North door,” Juyeon informed as he followed the short man who was speedily walking through the crowd; the man looked flustered and slightly tipsy, despite being the head of cyber security for the South Korean government.

“I trust you’ll secure the package and not let it slip like last time,” Juyeon could hear Kevin tease through his earpiece. He spotted Kevin sipping on champagne in the corner of the ballroom, raising his glass to him to further poke fun at Juyeon’s previous failures.

Juyeon rolled his eyes. “Don’t worry about it,” he retorted, placing his glass down on the nearest table and following the target out of the ballroom.

Before he could exit the room, somebody stood before him – dressed in a stunning red outfit that could capture attention from ten miles away – and blocked the doorway. You stood in before Juyeon, an eyebrow raised as ran your eyes down his body. Most of the time when you met him, you were both dressed in your all-black protective gear; it was a nice change to see your handsome rival in a black suit, hair styled to perfection.

“You clean up pretty good for someone who works for the second best agency in the world,” you taunted as you dragged your eyes up to meet Juyeon’s eyes.

Juyeon gulped.

He had always been attracted to you, and this had been his downfall.

The two of you worked for competing agencies and were always put on the same missions, being the best and most experienced agents at your agencies. However, nearly every time Juyeon came close to completing his mission, you already had it in the bag. You were clever, stunning, and always a step ahead of him. You also knew that Juyeon was fond of you, and you used it to your advantage whenever possible.

Juyeon couldn’t find it in him to hate you for it.

“I don’t have time for this,” Juyeon said, trying to sound as passive and bored as possible. By the smirk on your lips, he could tell you weren’t convinced, causing Juyeon to falter slightly. “I’m-“

You pulled a USB stick out of your pocket and dangled it in front of his face. Juyeon’s eyes narrowed, and he could hear Kevin and Sangyeon cursing in his earpiece. Dread filled him, overpowered only by the adrenaline he felt whenever he was in your presence.

You had beat him to it, again.

“-looking for this?” you finished his sentence, titling your head to the side to feign innocence. Then, you grinned, tucking it back into one of your pockets safely. “You should get to know your targets better,” you criticised with a smirk. “Maybe it’ll get you somewhere instead of trying to sneak up on them for the first time the night of a celebration.”

Juyeon narrowed his eyes at you, unsure of what to say. “That outfit draws too much attention, how did you manage to get it before I did?” he wondered instead.

You shrugged. “Sometimes you need the target’s attention,” you reminded him, leisurely stepping closer to Juyeon and leaning in so you lips were next to his ear. “Poor Mister Kim kept his eyes on me and made it easy to snatch this,” you patted your pocket. “Right from under his nose.”

“Abort,” Sangyeon told Juyeon through his earpiece. “Get out of there. We need to regroup for Plan B before we’re out of time.”

Seeing how worked up Juyeon was at your victory only made it more enjoyable for you. Before Juyeon could exit through the door, you bushed your lips against his cheek in an almost-kiss. “See you for round 2,” you told him with a wink, leaving Juyeon behind with his heart pounding erratically as you disappeared through the door.

“What the hell happened?” Sangyeon asked once Juyeon and Kevin were back in the car. “You told me you had eyes on him.”

“I did,” Juyeon snapped, trying his best to calm his temper. Realising how rude he sounded, he softened. “I’m sorry,” he apologised. “Y/n got to him before I even realised. She probably knew his routine by then, maybe even personally came into contact with-“

“I don’t want to hear about Y/n again,” Sangyeon interrupted, sighing. “What are you doing, Juyeon? You’re the best operative at the agency, yet the same person keeps intervening on all of your missions. It’s making you look incompetent, and our team look weak.”

“He’s doing his best,” Kevin piped up to defend Juyeon, who slumped in his seat. “I was in the room, and you had surveillance on Mr Kim the whole time. Y/n got past all of us, not just Juyeon. She’s just too good at her job.”

“You’re right,” Sangyeon allowed. “I’m sorry, Juyeon. I shouldn’t have blamed you like that.”

“It’s okay,” Juyeon mumbled. “I get it. You’re just looking out for the team.”

When they returned back to CKR headquarters, Sangyeon called for the whole team to gather so they could put Plan B into motion.

“We know where the USB is,” Sangyeon explained. “Y/n is too far from her headquarters to get there by tonight, she’ll have settled somewhere nearby and will be waiting to get transportation back tomorrow. We have to intercept them before that happens.” He decided.

“How are we supposed to do that?” Sunwoo, the intelligence analyst, wondered. He was one of the youngest members on the team, but was no less competent than the older members. “If Y/n has custody of the USB, we’re hardly going to be able to pry it out of her fingers.”

“No,” Sangyeon agrees. “She’s only going to hand it over to people that she trusts,” he added. “So, we need to become people that she trusts.”

“Pose as her team,” Jacob, one of the main intelligence operatives on the team, realised. “If she thinks that we are her transportation, she’ll have no problem handing over the USB.”

“Exactly,” Sangyeon agrees. “We need to have Chanhee run cryptography as soon possible. From what we understand, the information on the USB is timed. We only have 72 to decrypt and access it before it self-destructs and erases everything. And we need that information to be kept out of the wrong hands.”

“She’s not just going to get into any car and hand over the USB to somebody she doesn’t know,” Hyunjae pointed out from where he sat, spinning himself in circles on one of the wheeled office chairs. “I’m sure they have a system where she gets the licence plates so she knows she’s in the right car.”

“It’s a small window, but we can make it,” Sangyeon was sure. “After we know the message has been transmitted, we take down the driver and send in Juyeon to pose as her driver. She’ll recognise him as soon as she gets into the car, so we have to act fast.”

Juyeon was unsure. “I don’t know…” he trailed off, thinking. “It seems too simple,” he admitted. Juyeon had dealt with you enough to know that nothing got by you so easily.

“Simple is best sometimes,” Sangyeon retorted, crossing his arms. “If we think about this too much, or create an extravagant plan, I think Y/n’ll see it coming from a mile away.”

Juyeon nodded. “Alright, leader. I’ll trust you on this,” he decided, knowing that Sangyeon had been operating for far longer than Juyeon had.

The next night, after the sky had darkened, you packed up in your lavish suite at the hotel a few blocks down from where the event was held last night. You were staying down low so that you could get to headquarters as soon as possible. You knew that Mrs Kwon was right when she said that the information on that USB stick was incredibly important; it also had a timer on it and wouldn’t stay relevant for long. There were only around 48 hours left on the information.

After receiving a text from your usual driver saying he was a block away, you secured all of your belongings and tucked the USB into a hidden compartment of your black cargo pants. Tying your hair back, you made your way out of the room and left your key at the reception. They already knew who you were and took it wordlessly, allowing you to slip out the revolving door to wait for your car in the back alleyway.

As the familiar black SUV came rolling around the corner, you smiled and headed over to sit down in the back. “Good evening Phil,” you greeted, getting in and moving to buckle your seatbelt.

The familiar click of a gun made you freeze in place, hands on your seatbelt as you glanced up to see Juyeon sitting in the driver’s seat. “Oh, hi,” you greeted casually, as if your biggest competitor wasn’t just sitting in a car he had abducted. “Nice to see you in more casual clothes. Do you think you could step on it? I’m kind of on a time crunch, here,” you said.

Juyeon narrowed his eyes. “Stay right there,” he told you, trying not to fumble with his gun. He didn’t want to have to harm you in any way, so he hoped for his own sake that you’d be compliant.

You rolled your eyes. “How is it that I’m always one step ahead of you?” you wondered. Quick as a flash, you lifted your leg and kicked the gun out of Juyeon’s hand, taking his surprise as a chance to grab the gun for yourself and point it at him.

Juyeon cursed, freezing in place. He should have known that the threat of a gun wasn’t going to scare you; you were better trained in hand-to-hand combat anyway. “Get out of the car,” you told him in a slow voice, looking at him through narrowed eyes. Juyeon could see the hurt that lingered in them, and guilt filled his gut at the realisation that you somehow felt betrayed by him.

“Y/n,” Juyeon began, trying to convince you otherwise.

“Do as I say, Juyeon,” you replied, opening your car door and slowly following him out. You realised that the narrow alleyway behind the hotel you were staying in provided the perfect place for someone to hijack your car. “Now, what exactly do you think that you’re doing?” you wondered, motioning for Juyeon to step away from the car.

“Y/n, just listen,” Juyeon pleaded. “I know this looks bad, but I just-”

Before he could finish, a giant force threw the two of you into the air. The force of an explosive going off in your car.

Juyeon hit the ground hard, winded from the explosion and coughing as smoke and fire enveloped the black SUV. You had also been thrown to the ground, but your closer proximity to the car meant that you had suffered worse injuries than Juyeon. Both your side and wrist had hit the ground at bad angles during your fall, your head spinning as a result from the impact.

“What the hell?” you exclaimed, coughing on the ground. You had a ringing in your right ear, which had been facing the car when the blast went off, and were struggling to properly get up due to the injury your ribs had apprehended during the explosion.

Civilians had started running away from the surrounding area, terrified. “You just tried to kill me, you asshole!” you exclaimed, horrified at Juyeon’s approach of getting the USB stick from you. Explosives? Really? “What did I do ever do to you?”

“That wasn’t my explosive,” Juyeon snapped in response.

“You pointed a gun at me,” you retorted, coughing. “Why should I believe that you didn’t try to kill me?”

“We need you alive and you know it. Besides, why would I blow up a car that I was planning on driving?” he added, slowly getting to his knees and attempting to stand up.

You let out a shallow breath, realising what this meant for you.

Your boss, Mrs Kwon, had sent a car with a timed explosive in it.

To kill you.

Had Juyeon not hijacked the car, you and your usual driver Phil would have been dead on the way back to headquarters. Police sirens neared you, and you did your best to drag your feet up.

“We need to go,” you murmured, Juyeon trying to help you up as best as he could. “Now,” you added firmly, wincing as you used your non-injured hand to take Juyeon’s arm. Head spinning, you did your best to adjust to your surroundings.

“I know a place,” Juyeon suggested.

Unsure, you glanced up at him. “And why should I trust you?” you asked.

Juyeon paused, eyes softening at the sight of your injured and scratched body. He sighed, “You know why,” his eyes implying even more than his words did.

And you did know.

Ever since you and Juyeon started meeting during your assignments and missions, the attraction between the two of you was clear. Competing against one another had only added to the heightened emotions and energy between the two of you, and when Juyeon realised he had fallen for you, you were once again ahead of him.

You knew the second he was emotionally invested in his relationship with you. But someone as honest and expressive as Juyeon, almost to the point where he seemed innocent, couldn’t hide how he felt.You had never used his feelings for you against him, and you had never indicated that you felt the same either.

“Besides, what other choice do you have?” Juyeon added. “Mrs Kwon just tried to kill you,” he had also caught on. “I’m the best shot you’ve got at hiding out until it’s safe for you again.”

You weighed out your options. “Okay,” you gave in, mostly because you could barely walk on your own. And partially because your gut was telling you to trust Juyeon. “Where are we going?”

After a short argument about whether or not you would let Juyeon fireman carry you, you had won the fight and did your best to hide how badly your ribs were really injured, holding your tongue and diligently following Juyeon. You had sustained many injuries from missions in the past, and you were quite sure that your ribs were just badly bruised and not fractured.

Juyeon turned on the lights to his apartment, helping you over to his sofa. “This is my place,” he explained. It wasn’t too far from where the blast went off, and it was the only safe place Juyeon could think of letting the two of you hide out. He went into the kitchen and rifled through his drawers for his first-aid kit.

“I thought you were just going to take me to your headquarters,” you admitted. “Why didn’t you?”

Juyeon paused his search, spotting the first aid kit and pulling it out quietly. “I don’t know,” he replied, sighing. “You’re hurt and I can’t take you to the hospital because we’re spies and I’m not trying to let you bleed out or anything,” he added, kneeling in front of you and tending to your wounds. He had clearly looked after his own injuries before in the past, as you often had to do after missions, so you let him help you as the two of you sat in silence.

You had always known that Juyeon was handsome. The first time you met him, it was the first thing you noticed about him; his sharp features, small eyes and narrow nose. Something about the combination of his characteristics made him more stunning than you could comprehend.

“Stop staring at me,” Juyeon mumbled, sounding more shy than teasing under your stare. “It’s making me nervous.”

You rose an eyebrow. “I didn’t think spies got nervous,” you replied.

Juyeon paused his handiwork to meet your eyes, an eyebrow raised. “We don’t. I can disarm a bomb anytime. Get information out of the least willing witnesses. But you. You make me nervous,” he retorted. His words caused your breath to catch in your chest, eyes widening slightly at his candour.

You allowed Juyeon to finish tending to your wounds in silence, thinking better than to provoke him again. You weren’t sure what you would say if he responded to your questions like that again, so you decided to not say anything at all. When he finished, you thanked him quietly and let him wrap your torso to support the injury on your ribs. Silently, you watched him tend to his own, much milder, wounds.

“You’re very soft,” you observed as Juyeon quietly put his first-aid kit away and brought you some water. He was far more graceful than you had expected him to be. “The way you move and handle yourself. I know you’re stealthy because of your job, but your movements are very controlled and elegant.”

Juyeon took a seat next to you, handing you a glass of water. Despite everything the two of you had gone through, it felt very comfortable and natural to sit with him like that. “I used to be a dancer,” Juyeon said. You perked up at his confession. “When I was younger. It was all I wanted to do.”

“I can see you as a dancer,” you said, tilting your head slightly, as if imagining Juyeon standing on a large stage and performing. “You have that air of control about you; like you do a lot with your body,” Juyeon hummed. Feeling the need to level with him, you opened up more. “I used to want to be a magician.”

Juyeon burst out in laughter. “You’re kidding,” he accused in disbelief.

“I’m dead serious,” you swore. “I wanted to be a magician. Not a real wizard or someone with real powers, I just wanted to convince people that I could do magic,” you explained.

Juyeon perked up at your words. “A magician,” he murmured, as if trying to picture you with a top hat and a fake wand as a child. “I see that. You always have something up your sleeve whenever we’re on the same mission.” Juyeon recalled.

You smiled. “Sorry about that.”

Juyeon’s eyes shimmered with amusement. “No, you’re not.”

“No, I’m not,” you agreed reluctantly. “It’s one of the few talents I have. Other than elite espionage.”

Juyeon laughed. “God, you’re good at your job,” he sighed. “How is it that you beat me every single time we have the same mission?” he wondered, giving up on trying to pretend like he didn’t know you were the better spy. “Level with me on this. Every single time.”

“I’m good at reading people,” you shrug. “After a while, I got to know how you thought and how you problem solved. Then, it just became a matter of being a step ahead of you.”

“Which you always are,” Juyeon shook his head in disbelief. “Right when I’m about to act, you’ve already finished the job.”

“Like I said, magic tricks and espionage are my only talents,” you reminded him. “It just comes easily to me. Some people are great painters. I’m great at… physical combat? Logistics? Fooling people?”

“I think you’re an overachiever,” Juyeon mentioned it so casually that you actually laughed.

“Maybe so,” you mused, a grin playing on your lips. “Or I just really like winning.”

“Now that I can agree with,” Juyeon said, nodding to himself. “Everything between you and I is a competition, and you always win.”

“Not everything between us is a competition,” you whispered.

Juyeon smiled slightly, closed-lipped and slightly forced. “I wish that were true,” he replied.

You supposed he was right. In terms of your careers as spies, most of the times you met it was due to having the same mission. This meant that a large part of what made up your relationship was the competitive drive you felt whenever the two of you were together.

Perhaps that was why you tried so hard to deny the fact that you returned his feelings for you.

You sighed. “I wish that I never knew you were a spy,” you mumbled, hugging your legs and resting your head atop of your knees, your glass of water set on the coffee table. “I wish that you and I met at,” you thought about it. “A coffee shop. Or university. Or somewhere else, I don’t know.”

Juyeon nodded in agreement, following suit and mirroring the position you were in, resting his chin on his knees. “Me too,” he agreed. “I wish that I didn’t have to hide you here. Hide you from your horrible boss Mrs Kwon, and my team…” Juyeon groaned. “My team. Oh god, I have no idea what I’m going to tell them.”

“Right,” you recalled. “This was your mission. To get information from me,” you said, the thought making you pout subconsciously. “I’m a mission.”

“You’re not a mission,” Juyeon denied. “You were a part of my mission.”

“Two hours ago, you were pointing a gun at my head,” you reminded Juyeon, raising an eyebrow. “I’m a mission, Juyeon.”

“You’re not,” Juyeon insisted. “You’re… special to me. You’re not an object or an assignment. You’re a person.”

“This is so messed up,” you buried your face in your knees, willing everything to disappear around you. “Up until this morning, you were just the guy that I flirted with during missions.”

“That’s all I was to you?”

“No,” you admitted. “But that’s all our relationship was. Now, I’m on the run from my boss, who’s trying to kill me, and you’re hiding from your team, who assigned you to basically kidnap me for intel.”

“Why do you work for her?” Juyeon wondered. “She’s dangerous, and you’re doing missions for her.”

You shook your head. “You don’t get it,” you told him. “It’s not that simple.”

“Then simplify it.”

“Drop it, Juyeon.”

“Why?” he exclaimed. “You’re putting yourself in danger for somebody who wants you dead, and you don’t want to tell me why?”

“You’re right, I don’t want to tell you why.”

“Fine,” Juyeon huffed, purposely moving his body so he wasn’t facing you head on anymore. “I just saved your life and you still don’t trust me.”

“Do you trust me?” you retaliated.

Juyeon’s silence was enough to answer that one.

“Then we’re back to square one,” you rolled your eyes, moving your legs to stand up. “How-“ you cut yourself off with a cry of pain, having forgotten how badly you injured your ribs in the car blast.

You fell back against the sofa, Juyeon leaping to his feet to help you sit back down. “Are you okay?” he asked, voice rushed as his eyes flitted across your body, searching for any visible sign of pain.

Your eyes clenched closed as your severely bruised ribs throbbed, the sharp pain slowly fading now that you weren’t moving your upper body. When you opened your eyes again, you met Juyeon’s deep brown gaze. His expression had softened when he realised you were no longer in immense pain, and his close proximity made you glance down to his thin, pink lips.

“I’d really like to kiss you,” Juyeon whispered, his breath fanning against your cheeks as he spoke. “Is that okay?” you nodded, not finding the words to reply to him; drawing him in with your eyes.

He leant forward, bracing his hands on the sofa on either side of your body, lips meeting yours in a searing kiss. His lips were warm and soft, and his touch felt familiar despite it being your first kiss with him. You exhaled a sigh through your nose, relishing in how close Juyeon was when he normally felt so out of reach from you. Pulling him closer, you threaded your fingers gently through his hair, parting your lips to deepen the kiss.

This closeness, the fact that Juyeon was within your grasp, caused warmth to blossom in your chest and stomach. For as long as you could remember, your attraction to and feelings for Juyeon had always been pushed to the back of your mind; a fantasy you would never reach. And here you were, wrapped in his embrace.

Waking up in Juyeon’s bed was heaven.

Of course, your whole body felt sore from the impact of hitting the ground after the explosion, and you still couldn’t stand up properly without it hurting due to your ribs. But still, you felt satisfied.

“Hey,” Juyeon greeted, running his fingers through your hair, eyes bleary from sleep. “You okay?” You nodded, wordlessly tracing shapes onto his t-shirt covered chest, not wanting the moment to end. “Your wounds look like they’re closing,” he mused, searching your body. “I think a shower might be due.”

After setting you up with a towel and clothes to change into, you stripped your t-shirt off – having gotten rid of your cargo pants for comfort the night before – and made your way into the bathroom to shower.

Your reflection looked awful.

You had several cuts, bruises, and lacerations on your body from the impact, and you ribs were terribly swollen after you unwrapped it, blue bruises forming across it. Wincing, you hopped into the shower and scrubbed all of the dirt and dried blood from your skin. After using Juyeon’s shampoo and body wash, your chest felt warm and cozy as his scent filled your nose.

After lying in bed for a few extra minutes, Juyeon decided to clean up a little. He made his bed and picked up your clothes from where you had carelessly dropped them in his living room the night before. He paused, feeling the cold touch of a small metallic object in one of the inner pockets.

The USB.

Juyeon hesitated, not sure what to do with it.

A part of him wanted desperately to pocket the small device, a deep desire within him begging him to finish his mission and do the right thing. He knew that the USB falling into the wrong hands would be detrimental to the safety and wellbeing of many government officials and innocent citizens.

Another part of him wanted to tuck it back into the pocket he found it in. The information on the USB could only be encrypted for a short period of time. If Juyeon did nothing, then the information would disappear in 30 hours. He would preserve the progress he made with you the night before and  could make other plans to protect you from Mrs Kwon.

Juyeon didn’t realise how long he held the USB in his palm. Your footsteps snapped him out of his daydream.

“You found it,” you said, too shocked to continue towel-drying your hair. You had gotten changed into one of Juyeon’s long sleeved t-shirts, sweatpants, and socks after your shower. Had it not been for the situation at hand, Juyeon might have told you how stunning you looked in his clothes. “What are you gonna do with it?” you asked him, biting your bottom lip.

Juyeon glanced up, stepping towards you. “Nothing,” he replied, pressing the USB into your hands. He closed your fingers over it, covering your closed fist with his own hand. “I don’t need to do anything about it.”

The moment was ruined as the front door to Juyeon’s apartment was kicked down, several agents and elite spies from Mrs Kwon’s organisation making their way into the living room, guns pointed at the two of you. “Minho,” you said calmly, recognising your team leader.

Minho’s eyes had hardened as he observed the position you and Juyeon were in. “What were you thinking?” Minho asked, his voice unnervingly calm. “Why would you come here with him instead of going back to headquarters? You had a mission, Y/n.”

“She was hurt,” Juyeon defended your actions. “Her car exploded just metres away from her. I wasn’t just going to bring her back to your headquarters after your boss tried to blow her up.”

Minho watched the way you quickly pulled your hand out from under Juyeon’s, raising both of your hands in the air. Juyeon followed your actions, curious about why you were surrendering so easily.

“This is interesting,” Minho mused. “Is this why you keep failing your missions?” he asked Juyeon, tilting his head and mocking him with his words.

“What are you talking about?” Juyeon asked, narrowing his eyes.

“You’re purposefully failing so that Y/n can succeed?” Minho said it in a teasing tone, as if he was revealing Juyeon’s crush during recess in the playground.

“No,” Juyeon denied. “That’s not true and you know it.”

“She can’t be that good of a spy,” Minho retorted. “She’s beat you out on seventy eight missions over four years.” You remained silent, unsure of what to say with so many guns pointed in your direction. “How long have you been together for?”

“Stop it,” you interrupted. “Are you going to fight me, Minho?” you asked.

Minho had been your team leader for almost three years. You had each other’s backs, and the fact that he and the rest of the spies from your organisation were pointing guns at you didn’t sit so well with you.

“I might,” Minho admitted. “If you don’t hand over the USB.”

“I can’t do that,” you said. “Mrs Kwon tried to kill me for this, I’m afraid I won’t just let go of it so easily,” you admitted.

“Please,” Minho rolled his eyes. “That car blew up after your little boyfriend stole it from Phil. He clearly planted it. Why would Mrs Kwon put an explosive in your car? You’re her best agent, and she wants those files,” he recalled. “Forgive me if I just don’t buy it, Y/n.”

“Okay,” you shrugged. “I forgive you.”

You turned, nodding at Juyeon and balanced your weight across your feet before you leapt at Minho, swinging your arm in a punch. Juyeon followed suit, turning to kick the guns out of your colleague’s hands and ducking under their jabs. You took on Minho alone, since he was the team leader and the most experienced spy on the team other than yourself.

Usually when you fought with Minho, it was sparring during training; honing in your skills and building each other up. Now, you were fighting to get away from somebody you used to consider close to a friend. “You sold out,” you accused Minho, kicking his gun away from where he had dropped it during your fight.

“So what if I did?” Minho replied, raising an eyebrow. “You think you’re always a step ahead of everyone, but this time, I was,” he added, striking you in your torso. You yelped, falling to the ground as the pain in your already injured ribs intensified. “Any more tricks up your sleeve? Or just a fractured rib?”

“Asshole,” you exclaimed, biting your tongue to suppress more shouts of pain. You struggled to fend off Minho’s advances. He was larger, stronger, and in better condition than you were. Even when the two of you sparred during training, you could only ever win against Minho if you outsmarted him somehow.

Getting to your feet, you tucked your hair behind your ears and squared your shoulders. Minho approached you, diving with his hands stretched towards your torso; by that point, he had realised that you were injured and had a weak spot. You blocked it easily, using the momentum of Minho’s slight stumble to aim your fist at his jaw. Minho exclaimed in pain, falling to the ground and holding his jaw.

You risked a moment to look at Juyeon, who was easily taking on two men at once. The swift and calculated manner Juyeon moved in reminded you of how he said he wanted to be a dancer when he was younger. This, you could easily believe after seeing him in action.

You struck Minho further while he was disoriented from your hit to his jaw, not letting the gruelling pain in your ribs stop you from doing your best to defend yourself. Minho pushed you against the wall, both of your actions getting sloppier from the injuries you were both sustaining.

“Enough,” you exclaimed, taking the USB from where you stashed it in your pocket and holding it out of the open window. Juyeon and Minho audibly cursed, everyone stilling at your bold choice. “One more step, and I drop it,” you warned, the sound of the traffic outside reminding everyone that a car would immediately drive over the USB if you dropped it.

“Y/n,” Juyeon said slowly. “Are you sure you want to do that?”

“Listen to your boyfriend,” Minho agreed. “Don’t do anything you’ll regret.”

“Regret?” you echoed. “I almost got blown up because I had this. You think I’ll miss this thing when it’s gone? The only person who loses out would be you,” you told Minho. “This is your recovery mission.”

“Juyeon!” a shout came from the hallway leading up to his apartment. You turned, seeing Sangyeon, Kevin, Jacob, and Haknyeon rush into Juyeon’s apartment. They seemed to have realised where Juyeon was soon after Mrs Kwon’s team had, and were shocked at the scene in front of them. “Are you hurt?” Sangyeon asked, causing Juyeon to shake his head.

“The rest of your boyfriend’s team is here,” Minho drawled. “So, what’s it going to be, Y/n? Are you going to hand it over to me, or him?”

“Why do I need to hand it over to anyone?” you retorted. You had kicked Minho’s weapons out of his reach, and now that Sangyeon and his team were there, Minho was outnumbered. He wasn’t likely to try anything stupid. “What are you going to do? You can’t win this one, Minho.”

Juyeon watched with bated breath as you opened your palm, dropping the USB from the twenty-fourth floor of his apartment building. Sangyeon and Minho gave angry shouts at your action and you stepped away from the window, opening both of your hands to show your empty palms.

Minho moved forward, his fist colliding with the side of your face. You fell to the floor, Juyeon yelling as he ran towards Minho. Sangyeon held him back, stopping him from doing anything he might regret. “I’ll deal with you later,” Sangyeon told him. Juyeon startled; Sangyeon had never looked at Juyeon with so much disappointment before.

Your chest heaved with deep inhales as you tried to catch your breath, propping yourself up using the wall behind you. “And what about you?” you asked Minho, raising an eyebrow; challenging him. “Are you really going to go to Mrs Kwon empty-handed? The USB is gone. About ten cars have crushed it into the road by now. She’s not going to want me, dead or alive. She’s going to want the team leader that let her precious files slip through his fingers.”

Knowing you were right, and seeing how Sangyeon and his team had outnumbered him, Minho glared at you before fleeing from the scene, most likely going to hide from Mrs Kwon and her resources. Sangyeon didn’t stop him; Minho was of no interest to him now that he didn’t have the USB, and he was from a different organisation. Elite spies aren’t a part of law enforcement; he wasn’t going to chase after Minho like a police officer would.

“You don’t know what you’ve just done,” Sangyeon accused you, seething with anger. “You’re protecting Mrs Kwon under the facade that you don’t care what happens to the information on that USB.”

“I can’t believe you did that,” Juyeon added quietly. “You were almost killed for that, twice. Don’t you think we could have used what’s on there?”

You nodded. “I suppose you’re right. It’s a good thing I always have,” you pulled the USB out from under the sleeve of Juyeon’s long-sleeved t-shirt that you were wearing, an ode to the many magic tricks you learned as a kid when you dreamed of being a magician. “A trick up my sleeve.”

“We can trust Y/n,” Juyeon insisted, rushing after Sangyeon and Kevin as they led you out of his apartment complex to their SUV. “She hasn’t done anything wrong. Mrs Kwon tried to kill her!”

“Except she has done things wrong,” Sangyeon retorted. “Y/n’s boss is corrupt, Juyeon,” he informed. “Mrs Kwon has been giving government and civilian security details to the highest bidder. That’s the reason her company is the best in the world. They sell private information for profit, and hundreds of people have died for it.”

Juyeon felt his heart drop to his stomach at Sangyeon’s confession. “That’s her boss, not her,” he tried to defend you as best as he could. “It’s a job, Sangyeon.”

“Elite espionage doesn’t exist for the rich to play games with innocent people for money,” Sangyeon snapped. “Our organisations exist so that we can protect people and put away bad guys.”

“I agree,” you voiced, causing Sangyeon’s eyes to meet yours as you neared the car. Despite his harsh gaze, you weren’t intimidated by him. You had nothing to hide or be ashamed of. “Believe me, that’s why I took this job.”

Sangyeon studied your expression, trying to find a hint that you were lying or deceiving him. Then, he held his hand out to you. “I’ll take that USB,” he said. You gave it to him, seeing no point in trying to keep it from him at that point. Minho and the other spies from Mrs Kwon’s agency were long gone, and Sangyeon and his team wouldn’t be able to crack the code without you anyway. “Get in,” Sangyeon told Juyeon. “We’re going to headquarters.”

If Sangyeon wanted to take you to CKR, you had no reason to fight him.

“What’s the status?” Sangyeon asked Chanhee, who had been working on decrypting the files on the USB for over an hour.

You and Juyeon had been driven to CKR headquarters in seperate cars. Kevin did his best to be kind to you, but you remained silent and allowed him to lead you to a simple room with a one-way mirror in it.

Juyeon had debriefed the team on exactly what had happened when he tried to bring you to headquarters the night before. Sangyeon remained unimpressed that Juyeon hadn’t immediately brought you to them, and scolded him for taking away an extra 15 hours of time they could have used to decrypt the files and question your organisation’s best spy.

“There’s over 200 digits in the password,” Chanhee explained, still typing out potential passwords onto the laptop in a blank document. “There’s only three chances before the files self-destruct. I already used one of our chances, and I don’t want to try again until I get a better idea of what it could be,” he said, lush lips stuck in a concentrated pout. “It would help if I knew anything about Mr Kim, but he seems to be a pretty elusive man. Does’t have much of an online presence, which makes sense since he’s in charge of cybersecurity.”

Sangyeon sighed, rubbing his forehead as if he had a headache was coming on. “If Mrs Kwon was willing to kill Y/n to keep this information out of her hands, we need to get to it,” he said.

“What’s on it?” Eric wondered from his place on the sofa, playing a game on his phone.

“I don’t know,” Sangyeon shook his head at the youngest. “Boss won’t say.”

“Maybe we should ask Y/n,” Kevin suggested. “If Mrs Kwon wanted to keep it out of her hands specifically, maybe she thought that Y/n could crack the code?”

Sangyeon had already thought of this option, but he didn’t want to have to bring you in. “She works for that awful lady,” he reminded his team. “I don’t trust her.”

Juyeon frowned. “What’s she ever done to make you distrust her?” he wondered. “Other than the fact that she works for an organisation that we think is corrupt? Most of the missions she was on were ones that you sent me on, too. That means that she’s been doing a lot of good during her career in espionage,” he pointed out.

“Bring her in,” Sangyeon decided, sending both Jacob and Kevin in to collect you. You soon appeared, wincing as you limped your way over to the team leader. Your bruised ribs had probably become fractured from your fight with Minho, and any other contusions you had sustained from the fight were starting to bruise a deep purple. Juyeon wanted nothing more than to rush over to you, but he figured this would be the wrong move.

“Can you solve this?” Sangyeon asked you, pointing at the screen.

You shrugged. “I can’t be sure,” you admitted. “But I have a pretty good hunch.”

“Which is?”

“I got to know Mr Kim personally before the event two nights ago,” you explained. “Before he started his career in cybersecurity, he was a chemistry major at Yonsei University for his undergraduate degree. He used to go on and on about how he had to memorise all these different formulas and numbers to pass his exams,” you recalled. “But there was one thing he was particularly proud of, something that none of his classmates could do.”

“Don’t tell me it’s the first 300 digits of Pi,” Chanhee said, frowning. “Because that would be so boring. I could do that when I was eleven.”

You shook your head. “He can recite the atomic numbers of every element on the periodic table,” you told the cryptologist. “In order.”

“Pull up a picture of the periodic table,” Sangyeon ordered to Sunwoo, who quickly complied and pulled it up to the large screen in the centre of the room. “Chanhee?”

“On it,” he mumbled, already typing in the numbers in order. When he was done, he stared at the screen in surprise. “The number of digits perfectly fits,” Chanhee told his team leader. “Do you want me to enter it?”

Sangyeon glanced over at you. “I don’t suppose you made up an elaborate lie that just so happened to work in your favour?”

You shrugged. “Wouldn’t be the first time I had that kind of a trick up my sleeve,” you admitted. “But no. I’m not lying.”

Sangyeon’s brows furrowed together. “Alright,” he agreed. “If Juyeon trusts you, I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt this once. And we always have one more try, then I’ll know for sure if you were lying.”

Sangyeon gave Chanhee the okay to give in the password. Chanhee tapped on the enter key, a grin forming on his lips as he started typing frantically. “I’m in,” he said, causing cheers to burst out around the room.

The boss of the CKR spy agency entered the room, pleased to see the success that Sangyeon’s team had during their mission. “That sounds like good news,” he said, causing all the members of the team to bow in greeting of their boss.

“Yes, sir,” Sangyeon confirmed. “We just got into through the encryption with 28 hours to spare.”

“That’s wonderful work,” their boss complimented, smiling at them all.

“Y/n provided important details about Mr Kim’s life that helped us,” Sangyeon added, surprising you. “Without her help, we wouldn’t have been able to figure it out.”

“Excellent work, Y/n,” the CKR boss complimented, reaching over to shake your hand.

You beamed. “Happy to help, sir,” you told him cheerily. “After all, it is my job,” you reminded him with a wink.

The room went silent as Sangyeon’s team stared at you in shock. “I knew I made the right choice trusting you,” the CKR boss told you, looking proud. “There aren’t many people that can outsmart Juyeon on his missions, as well as work undercover long enough to deeply infiltrate Mrs Kwon’s organisation.”

“Did you just say work undercover?” Juyeon wondered, voicing everyone’s thoughts.

“Yes,” his boss admitted. “I hired Y/n five years ago to infiltrate Mrs Kwon’s organisation and expose her corruption. That’s why these files are so important,” he explained.

“Oh my god,” Chanhee muttered, flicking through the files on the USB. “This traces Mrs Kwon’s online presence, dating back over three years. It’s incriminating information against Mrs Kwon’s organisation; she can be sent to jail for the evidence on here.”

“That’s why she tried to kill you,” Juyeon realised, addressing his words to you. “Because Mr Kim uncovered her online footprints.”

“I told you it wasn’t so simple,” you reminded him, giving him your best smile. Juyeon beamed. He often wondered if he was naïve for trusting you, but you had proved to him that you were worth the risk. A double agent. Somehow, Juyeon felt incredibly proud of you.

“Thank you for your hard work, Y/n,” CKR’s boss thanked you. “And now that we have what we need on Mrs Kwon, I’d love for you to continue working here for my most elite team,” he invited you.

“That’s us!” Eric exclaimed happily, now solving a Rubik’s cube upside down.

“As long as they’ll have me, I’d love to,” you told your boss.

Everyone glanced over at Sangyeon, who had the final say on any new members as the team leader. After seeing your skillset that day, everyone on the team was excited to work with you. You had something to offer in almost any area they specialised in. Plus, you were a fairly famous spy amongst the different agency; known as the best of the best. Sangyeon seemed to be struggling to comprehend the situation, having gone through a pretty confusing day.

“So you’re been working for CKR all this time?” he asked. You nodded. “And you’ve been gathering information on Mrs Kwon to use against her with Mr Kim from cybersecurity?” Another nod. “And you really did outsmart Juyeon on all of his missions?”

“I’m afraid so,” you confirmed.

Sangyeon seemed stunned. “Then I think you’d make a good addition to the team,” he agreed. Kevin and Eric cheered, excited that someone as well-known in the spy community as you would be a part of their team. You were infamous around CKR for always outsmarting their best team, and it turns out that you were CKR’s best asset all along. Your boss said his farewells, allowing you to get to know your new team better.

“I can’t believe all of this,” Juyeon breathed out in surprise, helping you onto one of the sofas in the back of the room, careful of your injured ribs. “You’re…”

“A double agent?” you filled in for him.

“…Even more amazing than I thought,” Juyeon finished his train of thought. You grinned, letting Juyeon press a kiss to your cheek and hug you. “And always a step ahead of me, it seems,” he kissed you gently.

“That’s going to take some getting used to,” Younghoon mumbled, wincing at the sight of you and Juyeon kissing.

“My little magician,” Juyeon sighed happily against your lips, pulling away to beam at you. His eyes, tired and worn out from the last two days, glimmered with excitement. “This is so much better than competing against you.”

You laughed, wrapping your arms around his shoulder and hugging him tightly, wincing slightly at the impact on your ribs. “Who says we’re going to stop competing?”

note: here is the long anticipated full version of my spy!juyeon timestamp!! i hope you guys enjoyed it! it wasn’t super romantic like the other ones but i hope i capture the spy juyeon concept i was going for well :)

#the boyz #the boyz imagines #juyeon #juyeon imagines #juyeon x reader #the boyz x reader #the boyz scenarios #the boyz fanfic #tbznetwork #lee juyeon #the boyz drabbles #fic: i spy with my little eye #2k celebration #deobiwritersnet

[magnus-the-maqnificent]

Ok soooooo… @raziyekroos and I were talking about this post on @khaleesiofalicante’s blog (quick disclaimer - don’t fucking send anyone ANY hate. I’m not criticising the asker in the post or Dani, anyway. Most of my criticisms are directed at Cassandra Clare. But yeah. If I see any hate going around I’ll whoop your ass. I’m serious.)

ANYWAY, back to the point, I… have some beef with the fact that “Alec killed himself because Sebastian was hunting him down for information otherwise he would’ve fought on even after he lost everything” is supoosed to be irrecoverably canon cause… BISH WHERE??

WHERE IS IT CANON???

Sorry about the caps. We’re returning to lowercase now.

Let’s start with Qoaad, the book where we found out about Thule, about everything that happened in Thule.

Starting with this scene:

“Magnus Bane was one of the first great tragedies,” said Livvy as if she were reciting an old story everyone knew. “Bane realized he was turning into a demon. He begged his boyfriend, Alexander Lightwood, to kill him. Alec did, and then turned the sword on himself. Their bodies were found together in the ruins of New York.”

Julian had gone whiter than paper. Emma put her head down, feeling like she might faint.

Magnus and Alec, who had always been a symbol of all that was good, so horribly gone.

This is where we find out that Magnus was killed by Alec, and then Alec killed himself. We don’t know anything about Alec’s motivations, or why he killed himself.

But we do get an idea in this scene:

Clary sighed. “Jace hates being away from Alec at times like this. There isn’t anything he can do, but I understand wanting to be with your parabatai when they’re suffering. I’d want to be with Simon.”

“It’s not like he’s there just for himself,” Emma said. The sky was dark blue and chased with fading clouds. “I’m sure it’s better for Alec, having him there. I mean, I think part of what was so awful for the Alec in Thule was that he must have felt so alone when he lost Magnus. So many of his friends were already dead, and his parabatai was worse than dead.”

Clary shuddered. “We should talk about something more cheerful.”

Emma clearly says that losing Magnus, along with several other friends and his parabatai was what drove Thule!Alec to suicide. Clary doesn’t deny it either - in fact, her reaction suggests the opposite, like she sees exactly what Emma means and she understands. Neither of them know about Alec having information about the resistance and about Sebastian looking for him. They’re not confused about why Thule!Alec did what he did, they’re not questioning his motives or thinking “Alec wouldn’t do something like that, there must be something more to it”

Okay, moving on- we also have this scene

“Okay, let’s talk about the important part.” Magnus turned to Alec with a furious look on his face. “You killed yourself? Why would you do that?”

Alec looked startled. “That wasn’t me,” he pointed out. “It’s an alternate universe, Magnus!”

Magnus grabbed Alec by the front of his shirt. “If I die, you are not allowed to do anything like that! Who would take care of our kids? How could you do that to them?”

“We never had kids in that world!” Alec protested.

“Where are Rafe and Max?” Emma whispered to Cristina.

“Simon and Isabelle are looking after them in New York. Alec checks in every day to see if Max is getting sick, but he seems fine so far,” Cristina whispered back.

“You are not allowed to hurt yourself, under any circumstances,” Magnus said, his voice gruff. “Do you understand that, Alexander?”

“I would never,” Alec said softly, stroking Magnus’s cheek. Magnus clasped Alec’s hand against his face. “Never.”

They all looked away, letting Magnus and Alec have their moment in privacy.

Magnus’s reaction in these scene says a LOT. There’s the fact that he’s seen Alec’s self-sacrificing part before ofc, but it’s undeniable that here, he sees Alec killing himself, in a landscape like Thule, as a very real possibility - enough that it SCARES him.

Magnus isn’t questioning it either. Magnus isn’t saying “That doesn’t sound like my Alexander, are you sure there’s nothing more?”

There’s NOTHING in any of these scenes from qoaad that suggests that Alec killed himself not out of hopelessness after he lost Magnus but because he knew Sebastian was after him for information. NOTHING.

Now, note that qoaad is part of the main canon. It goes without saying, and Cassie knows this too, that the main series (tmi, tid, tda, tlh, and later twp) are… slightly more canon than the other books (tbc, tftsa, gotsm and tec), in that the first set of books has a much wider audience. People are more likely to read them than the second set of books, which act more like a side to the main series. These books are more likely to be read by fans interested in knowing more about their favourite characters than the mainstream audience.

Sooo… if Cassie wants Thule!Alec’s motivations to be clear, why not just put it in qoaad? It would’ve been like, one extra line? Why put it in the side course instead of the main dish? There’s a lot of people who will just read tda without reading gotsm. They’re all gonna believe that Alec died because he was hopeless and not because of any heroic sacrificial reasons. If Cassie wants “Alec killed his self because of Sebastian hunting him down” to be the unequivocal truth, why not just put it in qoaad? Why put it in gotsm?

Speaking of which, let’s look at the side dish gotsm. Keep in mind here, that Forever Fallen, the short story in which this takes place, was released more than SIX MONTHS after qoaad came out, enough time to make small edits and add in some details, and definitely more than enough time to review people’s reactions and see what they thought about Thule!Alec. (I’m not accusing Cassie of anything, I’m just speculating here)

THIS is the scene that reveals Thule!Alec’s supposedly true reasons for killing himself.

Janus remembered another world. Alec had still been clinging to what Magnus had become, at the very last. Those strong scarred archer’s hands, always swift to protect and defend, held him fast. Even in death, there seemed no way to break Alec’s grip.

Janus hadn’t had the chance to take Clary in his arms one last time, as Alec had with Magnus. Janus understood the choice his parabatai had made, the only choice he could’ve made with evil on his threshold and all he loved in ruins.

When Janus and Sebastian found them lying together in the rubble, Sebastian had been furious. He had wanted to capture Alec alive. Alec knew secrets about the resistance, about small pockets of hidden free humans: information Sebastian craved and that Alec had died to hide.

With a howl, Sebastian had kicked at Alec’s body. The desolate lack where the parabatai bond had been screamed. It was one of the few times Janus was able to think, Kill him.

Okay so hmm… where do I begin.

Janus says that Alec died to protect secrets about the resistance from Sebastian, and I’m not arguing with that of course. Sebastian was definitely part of why Thule!Alec did what he did.

BUT, in the paragraph that comes right before that, Janus acknowledges that losing Magnus, along with a lot of other people and things that Alec loved, was part of what drove him to killing himself.

Also, there’s this paragraph from Forever Fallen…

Max, thought Janus. Long ago, the youngest Lightwood. In this world Magnus was alive, so Alec was alive. Alec was the Consul, and they had children. Alec had named his son for that lost Max.

…which pretty much confirms that Alec would NOT have killed himself if Magnus hadn’t died first.

Like, yes, gotsm says that Alec killed himself because of Sebastian hunting him down, but ALSO because he lost a lot, including Magnus.

Now, again, this begs the question, why not just put it in qoaad? If everyone knows about how Magnus and Alec died without having been there, surely they’d also know that they were being hunted by Sebastian? Cameron had insider information since his family was sworn to Sebastian, surely he’d know that Sebastian was looking for Alec? If Magnus and Alec knew they were being hunted, surely everyone else in the resistance would know, too?

It feels almost as if this explanation - that Alec killed himself because he knew he’d be forced to give up information if he lived - was an afterthought. Created in response to backlash, maybe? This isn’t the first time that Cassie had a character with a tragic life kill themself after their partner died and then backtracked on the suicide part to make them look more ‘noble’ instead (*cough* Celine *cough*)

Anyway, speaking of afterthoughts and backlash, there’s also this ask on Cassie’s tumblr

What Cassie is basically saying here is that Thule!Alec wouldn’t have killed himself, no matter what he lost, and only did so because Sebastian was hunting him buuut um *looks at the scenes I added above* it kinda disagrees with her own books?

Like, if Alec only killed himself to protect the resistance then… why isn’t it more explicit in the books? Why mention again and again how Alec lost everything, and especially how he lost Magnus? Why is it in a fucking tumblr post that only die-hard fans are going to see, Cassandra? 🤨

Like I said, it feels SO MUCH like an afterthought.

And also like… about a lot of the fandom’s attitude towards Thule!Alec… so what if he didn’t sacrifice himself and committed suicide instead? So what? Why should it make him any less of a hero?

Like… I’m not gonna say it’s romantic that Thule!Alec committed suicide after he killed Thule!Magnus because it wasn’t. It was tragic and cruel and it’s MEANT to be tragic and cruel cause that’s the whole point of Thule! And it’s not entirely black and white like… Alec killed himself because he lost Magnus. Alec killed himself because he lost a lot. Alec killed himself because Sebastian was hunting him down for information. It all coexists!!

Saying that Thule!Alec only killed himself because of Seb and that it’s canon is… well, incorrect, cause it’s BARELY canon. The author had to confirm it in a tumblr post. Meanwhile, the books provide plenty of evidence that Alec losing a lot of people, especially Magnus, had a huge role to play in his decision.

Also, Thule!Alec committing suicide doesn’t take away from his character in any way. It doesn’t make him any less of a hero, any less of a badass, any less of ANYTHING, and saying otherwise is just… ????

Anyway, yeah. If you’ve read this far you get a cookie. Thanks.

#people’s attitude towards suicide #especially in this context #is so weird to me??? #like yeah suicide is BAD but because it’s tragic #not because it’s morally reprehensible somehow? #like I don’t get their logic #oof anyways #alec lightwood #thule!alec #thule #qoaad #tsc #tw suicide #tw death

[regencyslxt]

In His Defense

1555 words.

Imagine Bucky catching you defending him at work.

warning: like 1 swear word.

You had been in the office now for around 7 hours. You were an agent in training, however, so far despite the sparring and training you had done in the compound with Steve and the other Avengers you were yet to progress further than your desk. You wouldn’t have minded, you knew your computer skills were advanced, if it weren’t for a couple of agents on your floor who didn’t quite understand that sound travels. Meaning every word that slipped past their lips, you heard. And you ignored it too, that was until they started talking about the blue-eyed god Steve always brought to your training sessions.

Bucky Barnes. Ex Hydra assassin turned hero. Your work crush. In fact, he was your crush out of work too. He seemed to have wormed his way into your every thought, not that you were complaining. He had been nothing short of a sweetheart. Holding doors open when he sees you coming, telling you good morning when you get to work early. Let’s not even talk about his constant encouragement during 1 v 1’s. He could sweep you flat on your ass and he’d still tell you what a great job you’d done. God you were whipped. And the worst part is, you knew he didn’t think of you even remotely close to the way you thought of him. How could he? You weren’t an avenger; you weren’t even a field agent yet.

Anyways, you could handle your co-workers (not that you enjoyed working with them) gossiping about you.

“Look at her, it’s no wonder Fury hasn’t put her out on the field yet.”

“She’s always glued to that screen and if she not staring at her monitor, she’s staring at Agent Barnes.”

“It’s so pathetic.”

You were used to it. Ever since they found out about your little crush on Barnes they hadn’t shut up about it. It was to be expected, it was all they were good for. The last mission they went on together went bust, they gave away their position within a half-hour of them arriving and almost got the team they were with killed. Dumbasses.

Recently, however, instead of focussing on you they had directed their attention to the metal armed veteran that walked through the corridors.

“I can’t believe he’s here…like how many people did he kill, and we’re just expected to work happily alongside him, I don’t think so” one scoffed.

“I know, I guess being best friends with Captain America means everyone turns a blind eye.”

…

“Do you think he remembers? I hope he does.”

“He doesn’t deserve to forget.”

…

You were very well aware of what he had done in his past, who wasn’t? You were also aware, though, of how hard he was trying to make amends. How every day he was trying hard to figure himself out, to figure out who he was before the Winter Soldier. So, when these two agents couldn’t keep their mouths shut for five minutes whilst the avengers were meeting in the conference room, you found yourself biting your tongue.

“He should’ve stayed frozen, maybe then they could get a mission done without having to worry about a random Russian guy triggering him.”

“Imagine actually trying to convince everyone he’s a good person after what he did, what a joke.”

You turned to them, unable to hold your tongue any longer.

“Can you guys shut up? I mean is it so hard for you both to just sit down and do the job you’re being paid to do instead of chatting shit because the last time I checked that wasn’t on the job description…” you spoke out.

They both looked at you wide-eyed.

“Excuse me? Who do you think you are?”

“It doesn’t matter but I know you know who I am because you’ve had nothing but my name in your mouth since I started.”

You stand from your chair and walk over to them. They step back a touch. The conference room doors open behind you as you go.

“What I do want to know, is what makes you think you have the right to stand here and criticise Agent Barnes for moving on with his life. For trying to fix everything he’s done. He feels bad enough as it is, he doesn’t need you two chiming in with your rude comments every time he walks past or makes an appearance. So, you can stand here and act all high and mighty but in reality you’re both crap at your jobs. I genuinely don’t know how you managed to be let in the field because as soon as anything happens around here you are both the first ones to cower away and tuck your tails between your legs,” You exclaim.

They stand there, mouths gaping trying to think of something to say but they fall short.

“Y/N…” a low voice speaks from behind you.

Your body tenses and you inhale a sharp breath. You close your eyes and look down at your feet, all the confidence you had before was now washed away. You had done it now, all the time you had spent forming a friendship with the man was now wasted. You really didn’t want to turn to face him but you knew you would have to at some point so you slowly spun on your heels to face his direction. His boots were a nice view, at least that’s what you told yourself knowing you couldn’t bring yourself to look elsewhere.

“Look at me please...” he whispers, stepping closer to you. He looked towards Steve and the others and silently pleading for them to leave.

“I think we have somewhere else to be don’t you think guys?” A round of murmured agreements could be made out.

“You two as well, I’m sure Fury wants a word with you both.” Steve motioned for the two agents to follow him, and they quickly made their way over and trailed behind him.

It was just you and him now. His hand made its way to your chin and he tilted your head up.

“There you are…” he chuckles. You can feel your cheeks burning as he stares at you.

“Come on doll, don’t get all shy on me now. You weren’t shy 2 minutes go.” He laughs at your embarrassed expression.

“That’s not funny! “you groan.

“I didn’t know you were all there…I would’ve kept my mouth shut if I had.”

“Are you telling me you wouldn’t have defended me?”

“NO, I just meant that- I mean- You- “You let out a huff of air.

“You don’t need me to defend you, you’re James Barnes. You can quite easily defend yourself…”

“That is true but it’s so much nicer having a doll like you do it for a change,” he smirks as he traces his fingers down the length of your arm, taking your hand in his.

“And I’m hoping since you spoke so highly of me before, that I might actually have a chance with you.” He quirked an eyebrow. You gaped at the man in front of you.

“A chance? With me? You want a chance with me?” To say you were shocked was an understatement. To be honest you weren’t sure if your ears were playing tricks on you or not.

“Y/N you can’t seriously be that oblivious can you?”

“Oblivious to what?” What on earth was happening?

“You seriously haven’t realised that you’re the only trainee I force myself to talk to. It’s not because I have to, but because your voice is the only thing I want to hear at 8 o’clock in the morning when I’m still half asleep. You are the only person that makes my mind go blank, that’s why even if I want to spend my entire day talking to you all I can bring myself to say is good morning. You fluster me Y/N Y/L/N, and it’s an issue because Sam won’t leave me alone about it.”

You laugh softly, still completely in shock at the fact the man you have had feelings for since you got the job here is currently confessing his feelings for you.

“So to answer your question yes, I am asking if I have a chance with you.” his hands wrap around your waist and he pulls you close, his eyes move to meet yours and your breath catches in your throat. You blink up at him, moving your own hands to the nape of his neck, subconsciously playing with his hair.

“I can’t believe this is happening right now,” you admit.

“There isn’t anything on this earth that could make me say no to you Bucky, so yes. I will give you a chance. And one after that, then one after that…” you continue until Bucky catches you in a kiss. You pull back in surprise, but quickly return the kiss, pulling him as close to you as possible.

You both separate a few moments later, Bucky tucking a strand of hair behind your ear as you do. A yawn escapes your lips, and Bucky smiles adoringly at you.

“There’s a coffee shop nearby, we can go get something if you’d like...”

“I’d like that Buck.”

He connects his hand with yours, and you make your way towards the elevator.

“It’s a date.”

#imagine #x reader #regencyslxt #marvel imagine #marvel #bucky barnes imagines #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #winter soldier #winter solider x reader

[tuiyla]

What's your favorite thing about each of the 6 Glee girls?

This question is right up my alley! Glee girls love, always. I'm gonna pick thematic things if that's alright, those are juicy.

Rachel Berry

Oh, Rachel. This girl is so intense and dramatic but it’s clear form the beginning that she does care about people and what they think of her. In fact, she cares so, so much and gets so convinced that she only prove herself via her talent (which isn’t true but people keep reinforcing this idea) that she loses sight of other people. It’s an interesting conflict, that she wants to be successful to be loved but in the process hurts and annoys people. She’s only doing it to be liked but at some point her ambition gets the best of her and she can be so single-minded that she doesn’t care about the bridges she burns. Basically just please someone tell her that she’s still worth so much even if she’s not a star. But hey it all makes for a good story and it sure makes me love her even when she is annoying and when does callous things, even unintentionally.

Mercedes Jones

Rewatching the show made me realize that Mercedes is by far the most stable in her own sense of identity and values. It doesn’t come naturally and she does doubt herself, of course, which is perfectly understandable for a teenage girl. But it’s so interesting to me that she stands by her own values, her own worth and her friends in ways that no other Glee chs really do. I love that about her and I love that her journey is standing by that and achieving success in her own way. And as early as Laryngitis in season 1, Puck explains what the status quo is like and Mercedes takes one look, decides that upholding this is not for her and quits the Cheerios. That’s it, no corruption by the social hierarchy or going back on her beliefs that this is wrong just because she’s on the top now. Nope, her principles are more important. Go off, queen.

Tina Cohen-Chang

I'll be honest and say it's hardest with Tina, not because I don't consider her to be one of my girls but she really was given scraps if even that. She was so screwed over by Glee as a show but we can still work with what we've got.

Tina goes from a painfully shy girl to taking up space freely, to demanding it while staying mindful of other people. I know people get annoyed by the attitude they gave her in later seasons but I kind of dig that she learned to be unapologetically loud, even if has its drawbacks. Because why shouldn’t she take up space? She should have gotten a lot more support while doing it and then maybe she wouldn’t have stumbled so much but she still does it and good for her, too.

Quinn Fabray

Quinn's stuck in this vicious cycle and somehow still keeps persevering. She's expected to be Little Miss Perfect and when she's crushed by the weight of that high bar, she's criticised for even wanting to reach perfection in the first place. But it's others who put it on her and then turn around and call her fake or vain or whatever for wanting to live up to those very expectations. Add on top of that, her trauma and issues get dismissed because oh, she's a privileged pretty girl so it must just be champagne problems, she's fine. Even when she’s clearly crying out for help she’s just told to “grow up already”, as if her childhood wasn’t already taken from her at 16. Nothing she can do is right because the world keeps chewing her up and spitting her out. Ain't that a metaphor for womanhood in general huh.

Like yes, Quinn seems to be going back to square one a lot and it's partly the writers not knowing what to do but on a Watsonian level, it's other people making her be stuck and damning her for it. Honestly if I was Quinn I'd have burned down a lot more than just the damn piano.

Brittany S. Pierce

I love this girl so much, okay. So Brittany’s this oddball who might be well-liked but she’s constantly dismissed and looked down on because people write her off as a stupid and vapid cheerleader. But Britt isn’t dumb, she just sees the world in such a unique way and for a long time she mostly just gets told off for that. This is why I like the genuis storyline because my favourite thing about Brittany is her finally getting that recognition, that “oh yeah you aren’t uselessly dumb, you’re just different”. And I like that she turns her back on MIT, too, because they might have given her external validation but what Brittany really needed was to believe in herself and be allowed the agency to do whatever she wants with her extraordinary way of thinking. So she leaves that behind and stays a genius in her own way, hanging out with her cat and living her best life with her wife. As she should!

Santana Lopez

There are so many things I love about Santana but I think thematically, the favourite would be the vulnerability she struggles with throughout the show and in general how her emotions manifest as she grows. At first it’s all anger and lashing out so much at the world and all the anguish that comes from trying to deal with her sexuality. And all that’s because she’s terrified of what others will think, how they’ll perceive her. Even after Santana’s out as a lesbian it still doesn’t come easy to her to process and express her feelings in productive ways because she has so much to unlearn and grow into. It makes for a really interesting character journey where there’s always more beneath the surface and even when she wholeheartedly tries she still stumbles and falls. The beauty is when people start not expecting the worst of her and she starts believing in herself in return.

I think all of the girls’ stories could be circled back to themes of self-worth, self-respect and finding a healthy way of expressing that within their community. Now there’s an idea for further elaboration! The season 4 newbies fit in that as well, all of whom I also hold very dear and could go on about.

#glee #santana lopez #rachel berry #quinn fabray #mercedes jones #brittany s pierce #tina cohen-chang #glee girls supremacy now and forever #you know what's up anon lol it's loving THEM time #glee asks #anon #ask #anonymous #my thoughts #i want to talk more i love my girls #if only glee didn't hate them #favourite things about

[antiloreolympus]

9 Anti LO Asks

1. I keep trying to find the episode where Persephone waters Minthe in lingerie but am not sure which one it is, can anyone point me in the right direction?

2. Love how RS thinks that “This could’ve been an email!” is funny when it just goes to show how overly illogical and convoluted the plot is lmao. On another note, Persephone watering Minthe while wearing lingerie is an apt depiction because that wasn’t an actual occurence in the comic’s canon, it’s only Thetis’s warped portrayal of P.

3. I think LO would have been much better if it had been focused solely on Persephone and her personal evolution/grow. There's a lot of themes to speak about: shielded child starting a life of her own, Persephone's  relationship with Demeter and Olympus friends, TGOEM never being what Persephone wanted herself, accepting your real identity/power. Hell, they could have even made her morally grey and shown that deep down she enjoyed killing those people in the moment of wrath.

Her meeting with Hades could have happened in the very finale with her being matured young woman knowing what she wants. It could have been such a nice touch.

I don't see any Persephone's personal growth now; Hades just took Demeter's place being Persephone's shield and I don't hope Persephone will gain some autonomy after the trial and all the things coming. I expect some  doubtful HEA with Hades functioning as her parent figure rather than husband and this is very sad. 

4. i really wish there wasnt this infertility plot around hades because not only does it now put all this pressure on persephone to give him kids (god forbid the 20 year old have her own life and goals, her only use is being his brooding mare) but also itd be nice for a major romance story to show a couple doesnt need children to be "complete". itd be cute if they were the doting aunt and uncle to their nieces and nephews instead of  being stuck with kids neither seem equipped for.

5. Not an ask and u dont have 2 reply but I love ur blog it just hits everything I've seen + more tysm 😭

6. Bruh LO stans and people who say we should just move on from critiquing this webtoon and saying we made a whole anti community for this series make it seem like this is our only personality trait.

1) we critique this series like you would any other source of media. It's no different then when y'all like to go around talking about shit you didn't like in the media you consume

2) some of the people here are actually fans of the series who want to talk about it, flaws and all. Maybe they wouldn't be here and maybe we wouldn't be called 'antis' if the actual LO fandom spaces allowed for healthy discussions of the series and people didn't have the threat of being attacked online for even the mildest of criticism of it. Which happens often btw.

And lastly, if a white woman is making bank off of a culture she's not even part of, making a mockery of the gods that people still worship, and refuses to take criticism from the very people who's culture she's profiting off of, then I sure as hell am gonna criticise her and her story when I want to.

I'd actually be far less inclined to criticising if her and the stans didn't constantly say she was like the peak of Greek mythology or whatever bullshit. It's not like this is the first time someone's done a retelling of the Greek gods, modern or otherwise, but the way RS executed it, her need to be in fandom spaces, and refusal to accept criticisms from the people she's affecting are the real reasons why I personally come back every now and then to talk about it. 

7. ngl LO might be the only series I've ever come across in which it's dragging everything out forever but also simultaneously rushing and cramming everything into it. 4+ years publishing, 1 month has canonly passed in the series, yet there's a million different plot points and the main couple has the most shallow and rushed romance. Kinda amazing in a trainwreck sort of way, tbh.

8. I see a lot of discussion on how "romantic" it is that Persephone is gving up so much for Hades and all I keep coming back to is ... what exactly is Hades giving up or compromising for HER? Because she's throwing literally everything away for him, meanwhile he's done nothing for her in return. I realize the narrative claims it's about giving Persephone agency and all, but I've yet to see her get a single thing she wants while Hades instead is constantly rewarded for absolutely nothing.

9. idk to me i just feel like all this added plots are both so badly done (ive yet to see any that have wrapped up been wrapped up well) but also just make the product overstuffed and boring? like people got invested because of a single relationship, focus on that instead of making 5 new plots a wek and putting them on the back burner, only to try and include them in convoluted ways to overstate hxps importance when they were so minor in actual myth. it has so much in it yet it's still so shallow.

#anti lo #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical #lo critical

[mochii0park]

meraki; 02 I jhs

Title: Meraki

Pairing: Hoseok x Reader / Jin x Reader

Part of series: Waterlilies and Japanese Bridge

Genre: literaryscout!hoseok x writer!reader

Word count: 4.4k

Summary: Throughout your whole life you lived in your sister’s shadow, watching from side-lines as she formed herself into a successful businesswoman with an envying life. Never being able to fill her shoes you gradually understood the meaning of an estranged family and the burden it carried. The twenties began slowly slipping from your grasp which had been embedded with insecurities and longing for fulfilment. Pouring your heart out to strangers with a pseudonym meraki, you began second guessing the decision when an email lands in your inbox.

Author's note: unedited, i had fun writing this chapter tbh

Taglist: if you want to be added to the taglist message me

@namsope32 , @cuteipat , @ofvopemin

Masterlist

Meraki masterlist

<  chapter 01 | next chapter >

You absentmindedly twirl in your chair, chewing on the pencil in your hand. The ticking of the clock was inaudible from the loud sound of keys smashing against the keyboard. Your mind raced in different directions and to say you were anxious was an understatement. A black polished oxford shoe lands harshly on the surface of your chair halting your twirl. The stain is starkly visible, inhabiting your mind and annoying you endlessly.

Min Yoongi pulls his foot back; the action makes your chair stroll backwards the back hitting your desk. “I am not paying you to slack off during work hours.”

It took a lot of willpower not to roll your eyes. He exhales, leans forward, and takes the sheet of paper from your lap. You could feel the level of disappointment rise with each sigh as he reads the lines of the text.

“I understand inspiration has to come to you, but it’s been months.” He scraps the paper throwing it into the bin, the action itself telling you what he thought of your work.

To be honest your thoughts on it didn’t differ much.

“I am sorry. It hasn’t been my month.” Or your year. You cower further into the chair. It was embarrassing enough to fall behind because of your private issues but having your higher up pity you was by far worse.

Yoongi shakes his head taking a seat on the sofa. He unbuttons his sleeve pulling them until they reached his elbows. Working for him for over two years made you know that whatever matter he was about to discuss was serious.

“The single didn’t do well,” you nod as you recall seeing it flop dramatically,” We need to produce an album that will reach the top ten charts. That won’t happen if you sit here twirling for hours with nothing to show me.”

“I understand.” He clicks his tongue, a ding from his phone gaining his attention as he signals for you to hold your thought.

You mumble hypocrite under your breath relieved when he gives no reaction to the word as he locks his phone looking straight at you. He crosses his legs, hands intervened on his knee as he rocks back and forward.

He glances up at the ceiling whistling an unfamiliar tune. After a few seconds, he stops rocking, taps his knees enthusiastically and walks towards the guitar. He whistles the tune over and over until he manages to perfectly string it through guitar chords. You stare at him watching closely as he scribbles a few notes and tosses the paper to you.

“Try to write something that would go well with this tune.” -was the last thing he said before he put the guitar back in its stand and left the room.

You let the frustration out through a scream, the soundproof plates securing it between the four walls. Ignoring the papers laying in front of you, you dig through the content of your purse. You extract pack of cigarettes. The clock on the desk flashes 10 pm and you know a long night was ahead of you.

The lobby was empty, the patter of your shoes cutting the silence. You tap your foot impatiently as you wait for the lift to take you to the rooftop. Smoking was forbidden in the KT entertainment building so your only options either the roof or the yard in front of the company.

“Graveyard shift?” A voice to your right says.

You scoff placing a cigarette in the mouth. “Yeah, you too?”

Baekhyun nods following you inside the lift. “I wish trouble wouldn’t follow Jungkook everywhere he went.”

“He got into a scandal?” Baekhyun catches the doubt in your voice and smiles.

He closes his eyes, resting his head against the mirror. You watch with pity as he breathes out in defeat. “It wasn’t him per se. A friend of his caused ruckus in a karaoke bar in Busan. Somebody sent an image of him leaving the bar. He was drunk and accompanied by a girl.”

You whistle at the last part. Idols getting caught with a female was almost like a death sentence for their career, no matter if the female was just a friend. Jungkook was the star of KT Entertainment, the one who brought the revenue. The idol has had a clean image so far. He did drink and lit a cigarette with his friends but, who didn’t? Although he wasn’t problematic, he had a knacker for attracting trouble.

The lift stops at your designated floor and Baekhyun jumps already halfway through the door. You follow behind him, wrapping your arms around yourself for some warmth. The cold night leaves traces over your cheeks, reddening them. You inhale the air, the scent reminding you of last year’s autumn. The image of Seokjin smiling at you as he crunches leaves is shattered by Baekhyun. He stops in front of you a spark flashing from his lighter casting different shades over his face.

You lean in, inhaling the nicotine as the tip of the cigarette burns. You observe him as he inhales a smoke before exhaling it and making a circle out of it. You often forgot he was six years your senior. His youthful face and the lively person often misled people believing he was far younger.

He leans against the rail, a hand in the pocket of his jeans. The scenery in front of you looked like a young adult novel. The light of the city flashed behind Baekhyun, his figure coming out as a blur because of the smoke. His newly dyed red hair catching your attention.

The silence between you wasn’t an awkward one, on the contrary, it was comforting. Finding a smoke-buddy like him was a blessing. He wasn’t very talkative despite his upbeat personality; he somehow distinguished your emotions well and knew when to speak and when to be silent.

“Did Yoongi punish you again?” He breaks your train of thoughts, choosing the spot closest to you to stand.

“Well, I wouldn’t call it punishment,” you throw the bud on the floor stepping over it lightly before you throw it in the bin, “but I do have to write some lyrics to a beat of his choosing.”

“Sounds like a punishment to me.” He chuckles as he lits another cigarette.

You shrug your shoulders. Working with Yoongi hadn’t been at all difficult as how people told you it would be. When you applied for the position, you read various posts on forums about Yoongi’s wrath and the difficulty of the tasks he gave. Many people criticised him for his mentorship, but you had found it refreshing. He never sugar-coated his opinion; he was straight to the point kind of a guy, and you liked it. Well, not every single time but you can’t have the best of both worlds in this industry.

“I can handle it. He’s right, I am behind deadlines, and I should focus on work instead of my personal life.”

Baekhyun looks like he wants to say something but quickly changes his mind. Throwing the bud over the rail he presses the down button. You punch him on his shoulder, hating the way he never cared much about the environment and the disposal of his trash.

“I’ll see you around. Maybe for a coffee next time?” Baekhyun smiles as you exit the lift, and you hum a quiet yes before going in the direction of your studio.

A part of you always felt bad for turning down Baekhyun’s invites for a coffee. You knew his motives were nothing but friendly seeing as you’ve met his long-term girlfriend Dayhun. The two were a match made in heaven having the same humour and playful personality. Sometimes it came to the point where they morphed into one person which gave you the creeps.

You laid on the couch, legs looking at the ceiling, back twisted and the head narrowed to the floor. It was half-past midnight, and inspiration was lacking in every sense. You scrunched the papers with words you thought were bad and aimed for the bin in the corner. You have yet to hit the bin, the papers lying next to it.

You were about to throw the next paper when your phone buzzed. Deeming the notification oh so important you fish it out of your back pocket staring at the screen. Yoongi’s name appears under the official e-mail inviting all the employers of the KT Entertainment tomorrow for a celebration of Jeon Jungkook winning an award for the Male Musician of the Year Netizen Vote and his single Still with You winning the Best Pop Song.

You sit up straight preparing yourself to decline the invite when a message pops up.

Min the Boss Yoongi

The invitation isn’t optional for you. You are required to come.

Y/N

You didn’t even ask if I was busy tomorrow night?

Min the BOSS Yoongi

Are you busy tomorrow night?

Y/N

No, but that’s beside the po-

Min the BOSS Yoongi

Great, see you at 8 pm tomorrow.

You massage your temples trying not to sink further into the frustration you felt for this man.

Y/N

Fine.

Min the BOSS Yoongi

I wrote that everyone could bring a plus one if they desire, seeing as the two of us and Jeon’s manager will be working tomorrow night, I highly advise you not to bring a plus one. I won’t mind if you do, but they might since you will be by my side most of the time.

You type a quick reply and toss the phone into your bag. Sehun wouldn’t be opposed to the idea of a plus one knowing he wanted to infiltrate himself into the upper society. Meeting people of such status equalled cases with greater stakes and greater stakes meant higher pay. You were gathering your belonging when a soft knock on the door caught your attention.

Baekhyun’s head pops behind the doors. “I was about to leave do you need a ride?”

You smile at him and nod. Baekhyun gives you a thumbs up, happy knowing he won’t be driving home alone at this hour. Luckily for you, he lived nearby and had given you plenty of times a ride. You get up from the couch and throw your purse over your shoulder, locking the studio.

As you walk to the car you discuss tomorrow’s party in Jungkook’s honour. You chuckle as Baekhyun grabs his head already imagining scandalous scenes pernicious for Jungkook’s career.

                                                      ______

At the sight of the guests’ attire, you felt severely underdressed. The sleeveless v cut dress tightened by a small knot on each side of your shoulders fell a little bit above your knees. Combat boots were your go-to footwear on such occasions, unlike the rest of the women at the party you needed to feel comfortable in order to finish tasks. You had to run around from one place to the other, obeying each order your boss gave. Sometimes you felt more like a secretary than a songwriter. Under such circumstances, high heels weren’t an option unless you wanted blisters.  

The metal rings on your fingers clanged against the glass deconcentrating you. The room swarm of people of different ages and statuses. You fell back blending well with the rest of the staff you tolerated. Baekhyun stood next to Jungkook, the younger if closely examined looked exhausted. Yoongi stood a few feet away talking to a group of men, some that you recognized.

A hand taps your shoulder, a familiar lavender scented perfume reaches your nose. Momo lays her head on your shoulder. “I thought this was a party. It feels more like a business gathering.”

Momo had been the main choreographer at the KT Entertainment. She was the type of person whom you couldn’t hate even if you wanted to. Kind natured and a bit naïve, she was the heart of the company always ready to help you or brighten your day.

You chuckle as you pat her head while she twists the straw in her cocktail. “Well, Min Yoongi organized it. He wouldn’t know what fun was even if it hit him straight in the face.”

Momo chuckles. “But he sure knew what handsome meant. Look at those men at his side.”

Something you noticed while working for him was the pallet of handsome men he knew which he called close friends. The first you met was Park Jimin, a highly respected dancer that occasionally stepped in to fill for Momo when she was absent. He was very charming and well equipped with words that bared red shade to the cheeks of female employers.

After Jimin, you’ve met Kim Namjoon, a literary professor who frequently reviewed your work. He was shy which often came off as reserved but overall, he was a pleasant company to have when going through your lyrics. He gave them the spark that was much needed to make the song into a hit.

Next to Namjoon stood Kim Taehyung. You’ve met him on one occasion when you barged into Yoongi’s office after he sent a rather rude message. Out of all Yoongi’s friends, he was the one you knew the least. Unlike Namjoon’s unintentional cold behaviour Taehyung’s was deliberate. He didn’t even introduce himself as he left the office making you feel like shit for interrupting what seemed an important meeting.

Another person who was part of Yoongi's close circle is Kim Seokjin, who recommended you to Yoongi. The two were childhood friends and somehow, you’ve never heard of the name Yoongi until two years ago. As much as you hated Jin now, you were still grateful for his help.

The last person in the circle was unfamiliar to you. He fitted well with the others, his handsome face wearing a smile that never flattened through the conversation as he jumped into Yoongi’s words a few times causing the gang to laugh. He had to be very close to Yoongi for your boss not to bash him for interjecting but rather send him a smile.

Momo lifts her head from your shoulder and stands in front of you. “Did you notice one of Yoongi’s friends absent from parties?”

You swallow a lump at the thought of your best friend before you quickly shake your head. “No, not really.”

“Call me crazy but I’m sure I saw Kim Seokjin at these parties before.”

“Can’t recall. Why do you care about him when Park Jimin is over there?” You try to change the subject hoping Momo would take the bait.

She huffs rolling her eyes. “You know I am not a big fan of him. Sure, his work is splendid but him? His personality? It needs a major rework.”

You chuckle at her disgusted expression as she jabs the olive pretending it was Jimin’s face. “Well, then you have Jeon Jungkook.”

“What am I? The company’s serial dater? Can I be honest with you?”, Momo says you follow her line-of-sight landing on Jungkook.

“Sure.” You say as you watch him push past people before he stands next to Jimin, engulfing the older one in a hug.

“I am sorry I know you work with his team, but I hate his songs. They feel like all the washed pop songs you hear on the radio. The whole night I’ve been lying to people saying his latest one is amazing.” You laugh loudly at her confession partly sympathising with her. It was ironic how much you both loved the songs you wrote for him and hated.

“No need to apologize just because I work for him.” You shrug off her apologetic smile, her lips fall into a straight line after she swallows a big sip of her drink.

“It’s still kind of awkward. We work together Y/N, I make all of his choreographies.”

“So? Just because you work together doesn’t mean you have to be a fan.” She nods soaking up your words. She goes to take a sip of her drink, but she groans in surprise at the empty glass.

“I’m going to get another cocktail. You want some?”

You shake your head, and she shrugs her shoulder starting to walk away. Before she can disappear from your sight you call out for her. She turns around tilting her head slightly. “Who’s the fifth guy in Yoongi’s circle?”

You watch as she searches for Yoongi and the rest of the gang. The man in question seemingly sensing you spoke of him looks up at you offering you a smile. He was by far the most handsome one in the group by your standards. Dressed from head to toe in red he, stood out in the mass, the waisted suit hugging his body showing off his well-built figure.

Doubting the smile was for you, you look around searching for the real receiver not wanting to look like an idiot if you return it. Seeing your action, the man laughs which catches the attention of the group.

When Yoongi turns around motioning for you to join them you flush. As you pass Momo her touch lingers for a while on your elbow. She darts close whispering in your ear.

“That’s Jung Hoseok.”

The information left you out of breath, the e-mails he kept sending replaying themselves in your mind. You stumble a bit when Momo’s light touch disappears. Feelings a set of eyes on you, you regain your footing and walk towards your boss. Each step feeling heavier.

There was no one else to blame for the situation you found yourself in but yourself. You knew who Hoseok was in theory, he published many bestseller books and everyone who was even remotely into writing had some knowledge of him and his famous company. Although in the last couple of months your newsfeed lacked information about Hoseok’s whereabouts, you brushed it off as him working on a new book.

You knew about him all, but what he looked like. Jung Hoseok managed to avoid the press like his life depended on it. You saw articles of his assistant Yuta standing in his place at promotions and any other public event. If you only dug deeper or asked for the guest list, you could’ve avoided this.

Yoongi places the palm of his hand on your lower back guiding you into the circle. Jeon Jungkook waves giving you a soft but tired smile, Kim Namjoon nods in your direction slowly sipping the wine, Park Jimin gives you a polite greeting while Kim Taehyung acts as if you never existed. You saw Jimin elbow him lightly, but the man never wavered.

Your eyes stop at Hoseok who beams at you stretching his hand. Yoongi leans and whispers into your ear, the loud beating of your heart making it hard to differentiate his words. “Y/N this is Jung Hoseok.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you.”

Finally? What did he mean by that?

You muster up what you thought was a smile albeit a weak one but there. “The pleasure is all mine.”

Different questions race through your mind. Was he here because he found out it was you behind the username? Was he even Yoongi’s friend? Had this all been a plot to finally meet you?

“He hasn’t shut up about the Jungkook’s single. Something about it speaking out to him. He’s very excited to meet the writer behind it.” Yoongi tells you making your head snap in his direction.

There was a silent argument going on between you. It took you months before you accepted Namjoon into the small circle of people who knew that behind another pseudonym of yours stood your name. The songs you wrote for Jungkook mostly spoke of unrequited love and heartbreaks and it would mortify you if people knew it was you who wrote it. The pity looks you might get sent a shudder through your body.

“I can’t wait to hear the future songs you will write.” He says clapping enthusiastically unlike you who couldn’t even utter a word besides thanks. You felt like you kept were being rude. You tried your best not to let the events get to you, but it was hard with him bombarding your inbox constantly.

To your side, Yoongi smiles as if silently answering your question. Hoseok didn’t know you wrote the other songs, nobody knew except Namjoon and Yoongi. You exhale in relief, but the tension remains as you look up at Hoseok. He seemed like the mood maker of the group his smile permanently resting on his face.

“We’re currently working on a new song,” Yoongi announces, and you feel like you want the floor to swallow you up.

You notice Jungkook now paying attention to the conversation as Hoseok leans in. Yoongi turns to you putting you on the spot probably knowing you hadn’t written anything. Trying to calm your nerves you imagine Momo or Sehun standing in front of you instead.

The tension in your body slowly shimmers down, and you can feel yourself take control of the anxiety that was the result of the shock you felt from seeing Jung Hoseok.

“Something with a happier note I hope,” Taehyung says, and you wince at his stoic voice.

Hoseok tsks at him. “Whatever Y/N and Yoongi write will be a hit no doubt.”

“Whipped.” Jungkook coughs under his breath and Jimin giggles slapping him softly on the back of his head.

“We’ll see.” Yoongi smiles, and you follow his suit ignoring your burning cheeks.

Whenever you glanced at Hoseok he was already looking back at you. The attention he gave you every time you spoke offered you a feeling of importance that contributed to you speaking more freely in their presence.

“Did you manage to find anyone interesting to publish their work?” Namjoon’s sentence tickles your curiosity shifting your gaze to Hoseok whose smile for the first time tonight drops.

He plays with the drink in his hands prolonging his answer. “I did find someone, but I am not sure if we’ll sign a deal.”

You stiffen at his answer, the e-mails in your phone suddenly felling heavy.

Namjoon’s brow quirks up. “Not satisfied with the writing?”

Hoseok shakes his head, a weak smile on his lips. He bites his tongue before plopping it to the corner of his mouth. “On the contrary,” this seemed to confuse Namjoon,” they haven’t been responding to any of my e-mails.”

“That’s hard to believe.” Jimin joins the conversation, your attention changing between them as they speak.

"Did you offer them a bad contract?" Namjoon buts in jokingly once he finishes his drink.

Hoseok puckers his lips, slowly looking at Namjoon. "There was no contract to begin with."

"Your conversation gives me a headache. Can you finish the story in one go?" Taehyung speaks up and you silently agree with him.

Hoseok places the glass on the table in front of them, pushing his wavy hair to the sides. His eyes seemed even more mesmerising as they looked over the edge of his glasses.

"I've seen their work on a site and tried to contact them via e-mail. I’ve tried searching for them on other sites but with no results.”

"Why don't you call them or text them? It's the 21st century most people don't use emails as a form of communication."  Jungkook adds his two cents, and you see the rest of the table roll their eyes.

"Just because you use messenger and kakaotalk as communication doesn't mean others do. This isn't a chat between two friends, it's between possible business partners." Jimin scolds the younger and you stifle a laugh.

Namjoon pats Jungkook's back affectionately. "It's unprofessional to contact people through apps especially if you're someone of Hoseok’s status.”

"Anyway," Hoseok coughs straightening his posture," I don't know their name or number. All I have is the user under which they write and well the e-mail."

"Are you sure they are worth all the fuss?" Yoongi adds and you look at Hoseok who immediately nods.

"You should read their poems, Yoongi. They are magical, raw. You can feel each emotion slowly seeping into you. Just like with Y/N’s and yours song. It's powerful."

You tense up at the mention of your name which goes unnoticed by the rest as they engage in a lyrical discussion. You can see Taehyung backing away from the table with Jungkook following behind. Jimin occasionally nods to Hoseok's interpretation of your poems not interested but not wanting to be rude either. Yoongi and Hoseok go back and forward for a while before Namjoon excuses himself leaving the four of you.

"Anyway, I don't want to bore you with my work," Hoseok finishes the discussion turning towards you, " it was lovely meeting you Y/N. I hope to see you soon."

Highly unlikely you wanted to say. "Likewise."

He disappears in the crowd as Yoongi turns to you. "Jimin and I should talk to the other producers some more before we call it a night."

Soon enough they are out of your reach, and you feel like you could breathe for the first time tonight. Pulling your phone from your purse you head straight for the exit. You tap the familiar number, one you’ve dailed many times.

"Hello?" Sehun's voice cuts through your hectic thoughts.

"You will never know who I just fucking met."

"Seokjin?"

"What? No. It’s Jung Hoseok."

You say as you watch the said man lean into the wall of the lift before he notices you standing not far away. The last thing you see before the doors close was his smile turning into a smirk.

"Jung fucking Hoseok."

Miss/Mister Meraki,

I am writing you this mail in hopes of getting a response from you. Wishing the previous mail had landed in a spam box (rather than you not answering), I am writing you another one filled with more hope. After reading your poems I couldn’t help but notice the sad tone most of them carried.

In the light of the discovery, I am going with my hunch and will say freely that you are probably wary of me. Therefore, I’ve decided to take the time and let you get to know me. I’ll start by writing you little facts about me after I read one of your poems. Hopefully, by the end of the journey, you will choose me.

Kind regards,

Jung Hoseok.

#jung hoseok x reader #bts x reader #jimin x reader #taehyung x reader #jungkook x reader #namjoon x reader #hobi x reader #hoseok fanfiction #jhope x reader #hoseok fluff #hoseok angst #bts fanfiction #nct 127 #yuta x reader #idol x reader #hoseok reaction #hoseok fantasty #bts fantasy #bts angst #bts fluff #bts x y/n #red velvet #twice #baekyhun x reader #exo x reader #baekhyun x dahyun #twice x exo #bts x exo #meraki chapter 2 #meraki

[twstheadcanons]

This is a lore question and a slightly specific one. Cater as a character and otherwise is super interesting to me but at the same time insanely confusing. While at first I thought he would end up having maybe slightly abusive family there's a possibility that's not the case. His sister's seem to enjoy dolling him up and his mother seems to go along with it and his father's a bit more absent. I think I would mainly like to know what his true self is truly reflecting and also if Trey seems to know about this 'true version'. Don't feel pressured to anwser this if you can't btw ❣️

Cater fans come get yall’s food.

S, iideally I’d go through events Cater’s prominent in (Beans Day, Halloween), but that would just make this whole post longer.  So I’ll be using Cater’s card stories for now.  What we know about Cater, on the surface level, is that he comes across as happy-go-lucky, energetic, social, trendy, superficial, flaky, and insensitive at times.  But that’s Cater on a surface level.

So for Cater, his major issues from his background are:

his family frequently moving to accommodate his father’s occupation as a banker

his sisters dragging him into their own interests that he was expected to accommodate as well

Cater repeatedly states he disliked getting dragged around by his sisters and having cutesy stuff he wasn’t genuinely interested in shoved into his face.  This would even happen on his birthday, where his sisters got him things they’re more likely to enjoy, which made Cater feel frustrated since he was supposed to be the focus on his own birthday.  But despite that annoyance, Cater understands his sisters didn’t really mean any harm.  From the sounds of it, they liked hanging out with Cater, and assumed that Cater enjoyed how they spent time together as well since Cater preferred to go with the flow, rather than rock the boat.  

In his Bday SSR, Cater mentions that his sisters became more considerate of his own interests and asked him what he wanted.  All three coming from a family where they move and lose close friends a lot, the sisters are probably close and want to stay close to their brother as well, since they’re the only consistent company in a similar age range.  His sisters are each other’s best friends, Cater didn’t have that growing up.  He also mentions his sisters and mother’s sweets-making kick, and how he eventually got over having sweets every day.  But when he protested, it’d disappoint and sadden them/they’d have dejected looks on their faces, which Cater didn’t know how to handle, so he made himself go along with their whims to keep them happy.  

This pours into his social media life, where he’s a peppy, cheery guy that posts upbeat content and responds with light, casual, carefree messages to people.  His Lab SR literally has him state that he ‘should always be happy and excited, after all’.  So, clearly, whatever dynamic the Diamond family has, while not what I’d call something as heavy as abuse, isn’t considerate of Cater’s feelings and views Cater’s ‘go with the flow’ ways as approval.  If he ‘breaks character’ of the devil-may-care person he is on the surface, it raises questions, and Cater would rather just avoid all that and enjoy himself instead of getting involved in anything heavy.

Again, Cater doesn’t like to rock the boat.  He also mentions in his Lab SR that this obsession with cutesy stuff became rather invasive, and he’d even be criticised or second-guessed if he didn’t go along with the idea.  Cater ends up accommodating that interest to prevent any debate, even if he didn’t actually care for them.  That said, with such an emphasis on aesthetics being the way he grew up, Cater has a good understanding and practical knowledge of decour and eye-catching designs, which makes him helpful and invaluable when the time calls for decour.  This is something Cater knows he’s good at, and enjoys showing off since the focus is on himself and he’s acknowledged for his skills.

With their family moving all the time, Caters gained and lost friends a lot.  Cater has an outgoing personality, at this point, it’s safe to assume he’s an extrovert, so making friends comes naturally to him.  But when you’re moving a lot, maybe sometimes in the middle of a school term, .  Cater needs engagement and social interaction, but at this point in his life, he’s tired of trying to keep up with old and new friends on deep levels, hence his interest and obsession with social media.

One thing to note about Cater: he likes cutting corners.  a lot.

In his R card “Portrait of Rosalia”, it’s understood that Cater being nice to Rosalia by throwing her a party with some lively students around is a way for him to get on her good side, because Rosalia overhears the teachers’ discussions of tests and future lessons so that he wouldn’t have to study for an upcoming history test: while Cater’s idea of a party to lift Rosalia’s spirits is in good nature, he wants something out of it that benefits him.  But while disappointed the plan didn’t work, he’s quick to brush it off, and Rosalia’s anger, by mentioning that she’s cuter when uptight anyway.

In his PE card “This betrayer!” Cater only have five laps left to do in PE.  But he hates how sweaty he is and how tedious the overall task is.  So he uses his UM to try and avoid doing all five laps himself.  Riddle catches him red-handed, and Cater tries - albeit I’m sure he knows it’s a lost cause - to flatter Riddle at the last minute.  Trey’s also involved, and despite leaving Cater in the dust, Trey also returns with Riddle, because Trey knows that Cater’s the type that tries to cut corners whenever possible, something against the rules in Heartslabyul.  Honestly, as far as Trey goes, Trey’s someone used to the way Riddle holds himself back.  Cater’s exterior personality wouldn’t be hard for Trey to recognise as Cater pushing himself or exaggerating points of his personality just to keep up an image. especially after being in the same dorm for three years.

In short, while he isn’t malicious about majority of the time, Cater will use others to get out situations and tasks he wants no part of.  This is a huge thing reflected in his UM, as it allows Cater to be in more than one place, so that he personally doesn’t have to be involved.  Growing up with two pushy older sisters, it makes he develops a UM that complements a need for escape when pure wit won’t work.  And despite being someone with a superficial interest in trends, that experience accumulates in him understanding the basics about social media and how it affects others, himself included, since it became the only way he could stay in contact with acquaintances and ‘friends’ from previous years. 

 Cater has a good understanding of how people, in general, work, especially those in his agegroup, which makes him rather crafty when he wants to string others along and get out of a situation.  This doesn’t make Cater a mean or conniving person, and in fact, he’s generally amicable and social.  Cater lives by a pretty ‘live in the moment’ credo.  He enjoys having fun and not getting overly serious about issues when he can help it.  There are instances where he doesn’t care about the situation he’s in, or thinks it’s lame/boring, but he tries to make the most of it as something to post about on MagiCam later to engage in low-effort social interaction for a mental break. 

Cater pretty much states this in his Halloween SSR:

“If I left there, they remained there. That’s why I’d rather have a casual and happy time with everyone instead of going steady. It’s like a circus troupe, you know, having fun hanging with people all over the world and then leaving. And that’s why MagiCam is the best. I suddenly got messages from acquaintances from the school I went to 3 years ago. Aren’t my casual and light relationships multiplying? It’s lovely! “

Social media helps him keep in contact with people on a low-effort level, so the risk of moving doesn’t damage his relationships online like it would physical friendships.  As for family, Cater’s feelings towards his family are difficult, tricky ones he has problems with.  He certainly doesn’t hate them, but their lifestyle, the moving and pushy personalities, don’t mesh well with Cater’s personality overall.  When Lilia tries to relate to Cater’s experiences of fleeting relationships, Cater can’t help but dismiss Lilia’s empathy as surface-level, since, to CATER’S knowledge (it’s not like he knows Lilia’s old as shit), Lilia’s always lived in the VoT with his own family and friends, which hits a sore spot with Cater:

““Cater: ….Family…huh.

Flashback Lilia: I feel like I understand you. But it is just as Cater says, it might be the truth that you should not attach yourself too much to one person in particular.

Flashback ends Cater: (That was full of lies. For a guy who grew up in the same place and never had to deal with rebuilding relations over and over… He wouldn’t understand my worthless and meaningless feelings.)

/Notification

Cater: Hello, Trey. What’s up? Huh? Are we doing our rehearsal for our night show at the stamp rally now? And is Deuce from my committee lacking in hands, so Ace is helping him out? Darn, Ace is definitely going to use this to ask me for a favor later!

Cater: Argh! And is Riddle on the verge of a rampage? I’ll be back soon, Trey, please calm him! It was such a pain getting involved in the biggest crisis of this Halloween week! No, for real! I’m not lying. That’s why you don’t have to say such cold things to me, kay? URGH, TREY, YOU’RE SO CRUEL!!

Cater: Now that Diasomnia’s turmoil has settled, it’s time to change the mood. No matter how you slice it, we’ll still separate if we become 4th years… It would be different if I repeated a year though. Anyway, I should just enjoy the memories I’m making “now”! I’ll surprise everyone with this charming skeleton costume! I’ll show them my serious side!”

Cater calls his own feelings ‘worthless and meaningless’, which likely ties into how he got dragged into his mother and sisters’ own interests over his own, and sometimes even criticised if he didn’t go with their flow.  He also expects the friendships he’s made in NRC (as we see with him talking to Trey about the rest of the Heartslabyul cast), to inevitably disappear after he and Trey are fourth years with their own internships and lives to live.  Because to Cater, the future of his life and relationships appear disruptive and inconsistent, so instead of fretting about them, he wants to live in the moment and enjoy what he’s doing at all times, hence why he cuts corners to make things easier on himself.  This is why he can come across as superficial and easy to get along with, because he doesn’t want to fret over the details.

unrelated but we’re team ‘former dorm leader cater’ here because him doing it because it sounds cool and fun fits perfectly with his personality

#cater diamond #twisted wonderland #Anonymous

[beewolfwrites]

An Iron Box - The Black Envelope

@cheshiya @tenseoyong @szallejhscorner @something-more-original-please @ofsunsetsandpoetries @nek0dzuken @allozaur @hiqhkey @serenzippity

Finally got an update for you all! It only took about a week :’) Hopefully this wasn’t too boring a chapter, but there’s Kuina content, so does that make up for it? 

I will also update the master post too, I promise!

Here’s the AO3 Link. 

Thanks for reading <3

----------------------------------------------------

The black envelope was nothing more than a pointless ritual created by Hatter to fuel his paranoia. But it was almost incredible seeing how many of the executives and militants still obeyed it. Niragi had suggested opening it right then and there, only Aguni refused and decided to leave it until the next day - an unusual choice for someone who should’ve been desperate to become number-one as quickly as possible. 

Perhaps there was more between him and Hatter than he let on. 

I’d invited the others to join me in my room to go over the plan, and as expected, Kuina was the first to arrive. From the moment she closed the door behind her and jumped onto my bed, it became apparent she still hadn’t let go of our conversation this morning. 

‘You,’ she said pointedly. ‘Did you really think I’d have nothing to say about what you told me earlier?’ 

I sank into a chair by the window. ‘What I told you isn’t any of your business.’ 

‘Uh-uh. That’s bull and you know it. She’s our friend…well, she’s my friend, god only knows what she is to you. If you’re going to hurt her it’s absolutely my business.’ 

Hurt her? That simply wasn’t possible. If anything, nothing would ever change beyond what it is now, and the one who gets hurt wouldn’t be her. The thought made me smile. 

‘I have no intention of it.’ 

Kuina drummed her fingers on her knee. ‘Why do I not believe you?’

‘I don’t care about romance,’ I replied. ‘And what she doesn’t know can’t hurt her.’

At this, Kuina’s fingers stilled. ‘You mean, you’re not going to tell her?’ 

‘Of course not.’ 

‘You can’t do that, Chishiya,’ she said. ‘You just can’t.’ 

‘And why not?’

She slapped her hand on the bed. ‘Because that is hurting her.’ 

That’s ridiculous. Telling her would only push her further away. 

Before I could respond, the door cracked open. We had a guest. Arisu shyly stepped inside, Usagi and (name) shuffling in behind him. 

‘Just in time.’ I gestured towards the chairs and the couch. Arisu and Usagi took two of the chairs, while (name) seated herself on the end of couch closest to my seat. ‘Kuina, make sure the door’s shut properly.’ 

‘It’s shut.’  

Her voice was clipped, and the way she was pouting was simply childish. She could try and make a point all she wanted. What I had confessed to her would stay a secret, whether she liked it or not. I reached into the drawer of a side-table and pulled out the walkie talkies I had collected weeks ago. 

‘I’m sure you’ve already guessed this, but Hatter didn’t come back from his last game.’ The statement was meant for Kuina, Usagi and (name), as Arisu had already witnessed the body, however nobody seemed shocked by the news. ‘The militants are saying that he was shot in his game, but his body was actually discovered floating in the river by one of the supply runners.’ 

‘Wait,’ Usagi cut in. ‘How do you know about his body?’ 

I could’ve done without her skepticism, but she was the key to Arisu’s cooperation. ‘The supply runner told An in secret after our meeting, and I just happened to be nearby. Either way, Hatter was ambushed and shot, and Aguni is now the Beach’s new leader.’ 

The room fell silent, until Arisu whispered, ‘It’s just like you predicted.’ He ran his fingers along his mouth, rocking gently in his seat. ‘This plan of yours, you’re thinking of doing it tonight, right?’ 

‘Tomorrow,’ I corrected him. 

I passed the walkie talkies around one by one, savouring the warm brush of skin as I placed (name’s) in her palm. I could tell from the way she leaned in that she was struggling to keep up with the conversation, and though it was her own fault for not trying hard enough to study Japanese, I still found myself slowing down while talking. 

‘The playing cards,’ I explained, ‘they’re kept in a safe hidden somewhere in the royal suite. Nobody knows the passcode except the current number-one. But because there’s always chance that the number-one could die in a game, the code is also kept in a black envelope. The black envelope is only opened when there’s a new number-one.’ 

Even if we used Arisu to find the location of the safe, we wouldn’t know whether the code was correct or not until the moment itself. I had a few theories about what the code was, but it all depended on Aguni’s reaction during the ceremony. 

‘There’ll be a meeting tomorrow,’ I clarified, ‘and Aguni will open it in front of all the executives.’ 

‘It’s only read by the number-one, right?’ (name) asked.

‘That’s right. But as for the safe itself, Arisu will be the one to infiltrate the royal suite.’ 

Arisu sat forward, resting an elbow on his knees. ‘What about the passcode?’ 

Seeing how invested he was, I smiled. ‘I already have an idea about that. I’ll tell you when you’re in front of the safe.’ 

‘You really are cautious.’ His face twisted into a knowing grin - a little ironic, considering the circumstances. ‘Got it!’ 

And now for the others.

I glanced between the three of them, only (name) flinched and immediately lowered her head like an embarrassed teenager. The movement caught me by surprise, however I paid it no mind. 

‘You three will be on the lookout.’ 

Usagi rolled the walkie talkie in her palm and hissed, ‘It’s too dangerous. If we’re found out, we’ll be killed.’ 

I would’ve said something more, but there was no need. Arisu, the ever-loyal puppy, jumped straight in to defend the plan he knew almost nothing about. 

‘It’s fine Usagi,’ he said, echoing the same words I’d spoken during our rooftop conversation. ‘With Hatter dead, there’s no unity at the Beach. This is the only way.’ 

You only believe that because I told you it was the only way. You really are this gullible. 

Knowing I had Arisu convinced was enough for me. Usagi would never be completely swayed, but that’s just who she was. She was far too loyal to Arisu to abandon him and the plan now. And besides, the militants would deal with her later. 

I broke down everyone’s positions; me watching over the executives during Aguni’s speech, Arisu waiting at the end of the hall before heading inside the royal suite, Usagi standing guard outside, and the other two outside the elevator to the top floor. 

It was straightforward enough, and if any of them were suspicious they didn’t show it. At this point, everyone was so desperate to abandon the Beach, they would try anything. Arisu and Usagi eventually left, whispering between themselves. 

I waited for the Kuina and (name) to join them, except neither made a move. Kuina was combing through her braids and messing up my bed without a care in the world. The latter looked even more nervous than before, as though she had a question she was too embarrassed to ask. Some of the details had likely gotten lost in translation, and part of me enjoyed being able to control how much she understood. Another part hated how reliant she was. 

‘Why don’t I go in the royal suite instead?’ 

A cold tension washed over me, as if the empty void I was so familiar with had suddenly dropped open. That wasn’t what I had expected at all. Kuina’s hand slipped out of her braids, her mouth parting. 

‘No,’ I said firmly. 

‘How come?’ She shifted forward in protest, ‘I want to help.’ 

‘If you want to help, you’ll keep out of the way while Arisu finds the safe.’ 

‘Chishiya.’ Kuina’s stern look reminded me of our earlier exchange. Her language skills may have been less practised than mine, but she was vaguely following along, at least enough to criticise me. 

‘But what if I go in there with him?’ (name) suggested. ‘Two people searching are faster than one.’

Was this because I told her and Kuina to stay together? Silly girl. For someone usually so sharp, she was truly incapable of reading between the lines. 

‘If the executives start heading back,’ I pointed out, ‘you won’t be able to understand the others quickly enough.’ It was the best excuse I could come up with. If only she would take it and be quiet. 

Kuina slid off the bed and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. ‘It’s better this way, believe me. It’ll look more natural if you and I are together instead of just waiting around on our own. We can pretend we’re talking.’ 

(Name) pulled a face at how things had panned out. If she chose to go behind our backs and swap positions with Arisu there was little I could do to stop her, except perhaps cancelling the plan entirely. However that would raise more questions than it answered, and there wouldn’t be another chance like this. 

Leaving no room for debate, I tried to explain to her that Arisu would be better for the job, but with Kuina’s gentle insistence, she gave up pestering me about it and finally accepted her place in the plan.

‘Fine, fine.’ She raised her hands in mock surrender and stood up wearily. ‘You guys win. I just… I don’t know. I’m kind of tired. I’ll see you both tomorrow, okay?’ 

Hearing those words did little to relieve the unease I was feeling. Kuina’s smile was too fake, and once the door had closed and (name) was out of earshot, I reminded her, ‘You shouldn’t make it too obvious. If she knows about Arisu, she’ll get in the way.’ 

She slid into the chair where Arisu had been sitting, and rubbed her fingers against her temple. ‘This is a nightmare.’ 

A funny choice of words. 

‘We’re in a parallel world playing games to survive,’ I said. ‘This isn’t as easy as a nightmare.’ 

‘It’d be easier if you told her the truth.’ 

Kuina’s obsession was starting to get repetitive, and I was already bored of it. I got to my feet and pulled my hood over my head. The movement seemed to catch her attention, her head snapping up as I walked towards the door. 

‘Hey,’ she called, ‘where are you going?’ 

Fishing my headphones out of my pockets, I considered dropping by a certain room, but after remembering the way she recoiled when I looked at her, I decided better of it. ‘Somewhere where I can get some quiet. Tomorrow, you should go to her room before we start. There’s a chance she could offer to trade places with him.’ 

Kuina started to object, but I didn’t care enough to listen. Her voice silenced as the door closed behind me. In times like this, when my head was crowded and the hollowness was clawing at my mind, all I craved was the silence of the roof. 

----------------------------------------------

As the story went, Hatter had died purely in his game, despite how his body had never been cleaned up, nor the way it had been dumped without a care in the river. And now, the numbers had been re-shuffled, making Aguni the new number-one. At least, that’s what they intended to tell the residents. However, Aguni wasn’t officially number-one until he opened the black envelope. 

One by one, the executives all filed into the meeting room, Niragi lazily stretched out in the seat across from me, and Last Boss leaning against the wall. The former number-two, Kuzuryu, was calm as usual, resting his laced fingers in front of him. He shared a look with Mira who only grinned in return, a little too interested in the ceremony. 

My focus, however, was on the man at the head of the table. 

From the corner of my eye, Aguni drew the envelope closer and pried open the bright red seal. Then he paused. 

Well, isn’t this interesting? 

There was a slight delay where his expression froze, taken aback by the paper before him. His brows drew together, then all at once, as if it had never happened, he folded up the sheet and slid it into the envelope once more. 

Aguni wasn’t a man caught off guard so easily. Whatever he’d seen on the paper was the opposite of what he’d expected. Either the code was more complex than just a set of numbers, or the page contained something different entirely. It was when Aguni took Hatter’s ring and stamped it across the hot wax seal that everything suddenly clicked. 

The wax hardened, leaving behind a mirrored embossing of the word “BOSS”. A mirrored embossing that resembled a set of numbers. 

Hatter really was a paranoid man. 

The passcode was 8022. 

#alice in borderland #Imawa no Kuni no Arisu #aib #chishiya #chishiya shuntaro #Chishiya x reader #chishiya x oc #chishiya alice in Borderland

[miracle-sham]

Long for Who You Could Have Been.

| {Jasonette July 2021, Week 4, Day 19: Mistakes} |

| [Ao3 Link] | | [Masterlist Link] | | [Spotify Playlist Link] |

———

| They might be monster hunters and that might mean their lives are fraught with chaos and danger. But there were moments in between the contracts and courts, fragile and wavering like the dying embers of a flame; where pasts, and hopes, and dreams were shared in the refuge of the campfire. |

| Word Count: 1,764. |

———

| A/N: So this is my second to last Jasonette July fic but the last to actually be posted in July since the other fic (Prompt: Loss) is taking longer than expected to write, whoops! Anyway here's a shorter Witcher au that's mostly fluff with a tinge of sadness here and there. Definitely feels weird to be using/needing so few tags for the first time in a long while! Lastly, thanks to my friend Saf whose reactions to the snippets I send her, absolutely fuel my will to write! |

| Also side note, Don’t Like? Don’t Read. Also also, please do not criticise any of my writing. This was written for fun and receiving criticism, even in a compliment/criticism sandwich, is the exact opposite of fun. |

———

The fire crackled gently, flames flickering in soft almost hypnotising patterns. The light and warmth were all that was keeping the chilling coastal mist at bay, from reaching their little makeshift camp.

Crescent moon and stars twinkled above, shining their silvery light down to mix with the ghostly mist below.

It was almost haunting, in the precious silence, punctuated only by the gentle lapping of waves against the cliff rocks not too far away. And the low hum of the local nocturnal bugs and other such creatures; the flap of bat wings, the cry of an owl, the flutter of moths and beetles, the scuttling of hedgehogs, mice, and foxes. The air was still, not even the faintest sea breeze and yet the fret rolled and crept and seeped into every nook and cranny outside of the protective glow of the campfire.

Jason sat on one side of the fire, on his bedroll and worked on cleaning his silver and steel swords with a rag, not quite humming as he quietly mouthed the words to a jaunty little tavern song, the Fishmonger's Daughter.

On the opposite side of the campfire, on her own bedroll, Marinette had a cloak splayed out across her knee with a needle and thread in hand. Tongue sticking out slightly, in concentration, carefully she darned away at the numerous little holes that had formed from walking through the thorny bush filled forest that their current contract had led them into entering.

With a huff, Jason threw the cleaning rag at the saddlebag on the ground beside him. He sheathed his swords and pulled out his favoured weapon, the crossbow with steel and silver-tipped bolts. Immediately he began checking the bolts for any potential damage and ensuring the shooting mechanism on the crossbow hadn't jammed.

“Something on your mind, Blue Jay?” Marinette asked, glancing up from her needlework for a moment.

He tipped his head back and sighed. “I've been thinking…”

“That's new.” She responded, mirth glinting obviously in her eyes and the bubble of laughter in her tone.

Jason gasped in faux offence, mindfully dropping his crossbow and scrambling for the cleaning rag just to throw it at her face.

Before it could hit her, Marinette plucked it out of the air with two fingers. She hummed mock-thoughtfully. “Your aim's off.”

“You take that back! My aim is impeccable. Alfred said so!” He argued back.

She snorted. “Alfred is biased because he's your grandfather figure. And I'll take it back next time we get through an entire contract without you missing a single shot.” To punctuate her point, she tossed the rag back at him.

He half-dived for it, grabbing it with both hands and with it safely in his grasp, placed the rag inside the saddlebag beside him. Throwing his arms up in mock-exasperation, Jason scowled playfully at her. “C'mon! That's not fair, you've never gone an entire contract without messing up or missing with your magic either!”

“Yeah,” Marinette agreed with a nod of her head and a smirk on her lips, “but I've never claimed to be perfect at magic!”

Her words caused him to falter slightly. “Right,” he swallowed a breath of air thickly, “That reminds me of what I was going to say before we got distracted.”

She frowned, furrowing her eyebrows and putting on a softer tone. “What is it? As much as we joke, I'd never actually judge you for missing shots or anything else, you know that right?”

“Yeah, I know… I just.” He huffed in frustration. Hesitantly, he held her gaze with his own but not a second later, winced and shifted his to stare down at the flickering embers of the campfire pit. Avoiding eye contact with her. He clenched his fists. “D'you ever, I don't know, feel like this was all… a mistake?”

Scrunching up her face in confusion, she squinted at Jason. “What do you mean? As-as in taking the contract?”

“No! Well, yes but no. I mean…” He waved an arm, gesturing vaguely around them, “just everything. Becoming a Witcher. Or I guess in your case, a Sorceress. Do you regret it?”

When she didn't immediately respond, Jason huffed again, hunching his shoulders up and practically bristling like a particularly grumpy and grizzling moggy. “Look, never mind. Stupid question.”

“It's not stupid!” Marinette retorted, “I just… wasn't expecting a question like that at this moment.”

He stared at her expectantly. “Well?”

Tipping her head back slightly, she fiddled with the needle still in one hand and sighed. “I suppose I do, I know I shouldn't… but I miss the easy days. Like before I knew what I was capable of. Before I knew what horrors the world could bring. Back when my only worries were getting stitches right and not messing up when dealing with expensive materials. Or maybe having to worry if the Alderman's daughter was going to harass me at some point during the day.”

Marinette tilted her head forwards again, a frown gracing her lips, and shrugged. “What brings this up?”

There's not an immediate response, as Jason casts his gaze away from the fire—towards where the sea could be heard but not seen. His fingers twitched midair, almost as though plucking the strings of an instrument. “I never wanted to be a Witcher. I was a Child Surprise, dunno who was the one that offered the Law of Surprise though.”

“Ah, I sorta get that. I'm also a Child Surprise, didn't get to choose to be a Sorcerer either.” As she spoke, she nodded in solidarity.

Jason jolted, gaze immediately snapping up to stare at her, completely taken aback. “Wait seriously? You're a Child Surprise too? How'd that happen?”

“Well, my parents' bakery was attacked and Félix, y'know my mentor, saved them. He invoked the Law of Surprise, expecting to get bread or some other baked goods.” She snorted, “he was awfully surprised to end up getting me instead. And when I accidentally cast my first ever spell trying to escape the Alderman's daughter, I ended up teleporting to Félix.”

“So, wait Félix fucking invoked the Law of Surprise to get food? And got you instead. Holy fucking shit that's hilarious!” He wheezed, doubling over in raucous laughter.

Huffing, she cast a spell, causing a vine to sprout up out of the ground beside him and slap him on the knee. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up!”

“Ouch! Hey, no fair!” Jason mock scowled, choking back any further laughter. Quickly, in retaliation, he cast a weak Aard.

The telekinetic wave knocked into Marinette, pushing her onto her back from the weakened force.

“Wha—! Oh, so the vine isn't fair but throwing me to the ground is!” She griped, crossing her arms (carefully as to not prick herself on the needle) but made no attempt to get up.

Half-shrugging and grinning smugly, he replied, “you started it!”

She made an exaggerated groaning noise in response before slowly shifting her position to push herself back up into sitting cross-legged. “Well, now you know how I became a Sorcerer. How'd being a Child Surprise tie into you ending up a Witcher, if you don't me asking?”

“I dunno,” he shrugged with both shoulders this time, “I tried to steal the infamous Bat of Gotham's horse, he asked me my name. Reluctantly and after some bribery of hot food, I told him. Didn't think to give a fake one, at the time. He made a face, invoked the Law of Surprise owed to him and dragged me back to the Bat Witcher school.”

“Huh,” Marinette responded, “so if you hadn't… what would you have done with your life?”

Jason raised an eyebrow at her. “Seriously? This is me we're talking about. I'd have gone to Bard College, obviously. I'd have written poems and shit. And books, I'd have written books.”

Scrunching up her face once more, Marinette glanced down at the needle in her hand. “We're by the coast.”

“What?” He asked incredulously, giving her a bemused and questioning look. “What does that have to do with poetry and books?”

In a rush of words, she rambled, “we could take a holiday. I could find out about the spell to disguise your eyes… and uh hair too. That way no one will know you're a Witcher. And we can go to the bard college-town that's down the coast from where we are. We can scavenge together enough gold for you to attend, and you can write your poetry and books.”

Jason stared at her in shock, tears pricked at the corners of his eyes. Softly, as though anything louder than a whisper would cause the offer to shatter like his childhood dreams once had. “Oh, oh, could you really?”

As warmly as the fire between them, Marinette smiled, “of course! I'd have to ask Félix first of course. But he fell in love with Bridgette and she was a Witcher and he came up with a spell to disguise her whenever they weren't doing contracts or courtly politics. So I don't see why he wouldn't show me how to do it!”

Shakily, he wiped his eyes and smiled back. “Fuck, I'd love that!”

“Okay then! I'll contact Félix on the xenovox tomorrow.” As she spoke, a yawn slipped past her lips. “I think I'm gonna head to sleep now. I'll see you in the morning!”

“Good night, Marinette. I'm gonna stretch my legs real quick first.” He answered, hefting himself up and stretching his arms. “Sleep well, though.”

“Be careful!” Marinette yawned again and packed away her needlework for the night. She then wriggled into her bedroll. “And I'll try, g'night!”

“Night,” he whispered once more.

Quietly, so as to not disturb her, Jason slipped away from camp. Following the direction of the fret, he made his way down the safest cliff path he could find in the dark until his boots hit the sand. Step by step, he walked across the beach until the sea spray spattered against his clothes. He's close enough that the waves gently lapped at the toes of his boots.

Clutching one hand to his chest, just over where his heart was, Jason sighed and gazed longingly at the mist-shrouded sea.

“I never thought I'd get to continue my dreams after becoming a Witcher.” He whispered to the wind. “And now I can, thanks to her.”

He sighs again, heart warmed. And silently in the quietude of the beach at night, he cries alone. For his heart is too full with the kindness of another to contain the feelings any longer.

———

| Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed this little fic! Comments, Likes, and Reblogs are much appreciated! |

| Also feel free to send me any comments with any questions you have regarding this fic, I’ll be more than happy to answer! |

| @jasonette-july-event |

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[kanmom51]

BTS give us a ridiculous amount of music and content within the average year. We get almost too much and we take it for granted. And on top of that we judge everything they make by an extreme standard of excellence. But not being allowed to be mediocre is bad. Mediocrity should be allowed. If Lorde can come back after 4 years and drop a light, breezy track like Solar Power, then BTS can put out PTD. Excellence is too restrictive of a concept.

I am not saying that PTD is not exellent. I like it a lot. But point is, the backlash speaks to something fundamentally unfair: if BTS make something that a significant enough group of hardcore fans don't like, it will get treated like it's the end of BTS. I have been a fan for six years and I have been seeing the same anger and insecurity since BST days. Maybe everyone took a long nap this year and forgot BE the album existed and that it contained tracks like Dis-ease and Blue and Gray.

Many artists on the western side of things can afford to take long hiatuses from music and return to critical acclaim. BTS don't have such a luxury for practical reasons. My question to you and your readers is, why does it seem like so many people would prefer an absence of anything over getting song like PTD? My friend told me the other day that PTD had 'let her down.' She took it personally lol. Everyone can have an opinion and it's all cool to me. But ARMY, why are we like this? Are we too invested in BTS? Is this the flip side or love?

I agree with you anon. I think, for reasons I really don't want to go into at this point, BTS, being a successful K-pop band, are unfairly held to a higher standard.

A ridiculously high standard, one that Western artists aren't held to.

It's bloody infuriating.

Now, we can't put all of those who criticised the song into one boat, because, as I see it, there are at least two kinds of critics. Fans that say they want the deeper BTS songs in Korean, or non fans using PTD to bash BTS. The first want BTS music, just not the light poppy music in English, while the others would prefer BTS not create at all because they are threatened, in a way, by their success.

I didn't love PTD to start with. It has grown on me. Just like Dynamite. It's a fun song. But in any case I wouldn't go so far as to say I am disappointed in them. Quite the contrary. I am proud of them being able to continue and create and perform even through the pandemic, being able to bring us sad and deep music (BE) with happy and uplifting music too (Dynamite, Butter, PTD).

There was something I was thinking about, why this whole backlash with PTD happened with army. These are thoughts off the top of my head here, so yeah...

Dynamite was their first song in English. It was fun and succeeded immensely, but it was, and don't get angry with me, a whole load of gibberish as far as the lyrics (that btw were written by an English speaker). They were nominated for a Grammy but still the song was made fun of. That clip made with the actors reading the lyrics made me cringe a little, this wasn't about having fun with the song, but more like laughing at it (the George Clooney clip). Then came BE, an amazing album, followed by the next fully English song Butter. Butter's lyrics were great, there was BTS singing & rapping in English, and the fans loved it. Expectations were high. I think they were extremely high, that is also part of the problem. And then came PTD, which, in a way, went back to Dynamite. Same vibe. Lyrics are better, much better than Dynamite as far as meaning, but maybe fans being afraid of the criticism BTS would get, so much so that they themselves verbalized it even before the critics even did. Idk. Just thoughts.

#ask #anon