#i would cook people breakfast

[crimeronan]

3-ingredient low-energy meal. take corn or flour tortilla. add a handful of mexican-style cheese blend from the grocery store. drench in ur fave spicy salsa. fold up burrito-style. make another one, microwave for 3 minutes. bam. done. dry-mouthed autoimmune bitches will love how goddamn easy the melted cheese-salsa combo is to eat (YAY WET SLOP) hydroxychloroquine autoimmune bitches will love how the cheese provides so much protein that it's OK if you don't feel hunger and forget to eat again for many many more hours. also you dont have to use the stove or stand for more than 5 mins. thanks everyone i'll be here all night

#autoimmune tag #cooking tag #listen this is tongue-in-cheek in that i know most people would not consider this A Meal and that this is not a real recipe. #it is however earnest in that autoimmune bitches often have bizarre dietary needs and Special low energy #obviously this does not work if youre lactose intolerant. use corn tortilla if celiac. etc. #but anyway. dinner/breakfast that took 2 mins to make 3 to microwave is so easy to eat and feels like a full meal. yass #food

[lexicog]

ohhh LOL i get it im getting April Fooled (lol!). trans day orf visibility is tomorrow.

#trans day of visibility #trans day of eating food #i love bein a fuckin transsexual... and i love food #breakfast was almond butter + strawberry preserves + butter sammich. more filling than i thought it would be #ouuuhh i have so much celery and spinach i need to use before it goes bad but im almost out of miso paste #pro tip for you people out there make very hot miso broth. put raw vegetables + spices in it. cover it and let it sit maybe 10-15 minutes #add a carbohydrate & or protein and maybe some sort of dairy or sauces (naysayers and haters may bring forth vitriol and venom for this but #an unsweetened greek yogurt goes great in miso. tangy creamy & savory flavor. it awesome) #consider adding oil for flavor and for the absorption of fat soluble nutrients oft found in vegetables #and there you go big breakfast warm healthy and no cooking tastes good every time #well you might need to cook the carbohydrate/protein but the method goes great with big batch cooking / using leftovers #its not the definition of high cuisine but breakfast must come and go each day and some days the stove is an enemy of the people. #OH I GOTTA SAY. SCRAMBLED EGGS TASTES SO GOOD IN THERE. YOU GOTTA IF YOU WANNA. you just put it in #it circumvents the scrambles 1 fatal flaw by stopping them from going dry and becoming a torturous texture to endure. kind of genius. #art #drawing #digital art #my art #transgender art #transgender artist #transgender #trans #trans pride #lgbt #this year i would like to. somehow get out of where im currently living. so i can finally start transitioning. #another year gone by without it and it's weighing heavy.

[meownotgood]

Hear me out please,,,

Imagine a control devil Aki, hypnotic spiral blue eyes perhaps and maybe,,, maybe reader being this version of csm but Aki isn't after pochita, no he wants you

He sees through you and he knows he wants to keep you as his personal pet. He's so serious at the workplace but to you he's such a sweetheart,, he loves you so much his pretty little pet

He doesn't need a silly little leash and collar to let you know your his, his handprint on your wrist from those nights he claimed you, the bites on your neck and just his smell all over you alone let's you know that you're under his control

I'M ACTUALLY SO GLAD YOU BROUGHT THIS UP BECAUSE I WAS THINKING OF CONTROL DEVIL AKI A FEW MONTHS AGO AND NOW I CAN RAMBLE ABOUT IT

aki who is the control devil and head of division four instead of makima.... aaah with the cool spiral blue eyes, and I also imagine him wearing the trench coat and loafers that makima has, maybe a more formal hairstyle too, like half-up and half-down ponytail. thinking of him with makima's powers, like when she squished people in the shrine scene.... his large hands...

I feel like control devil aki would be just as intimidating as makima, but he still clearly has a softer side underneath all his coldness. and he still has a strong sense of justice, so he only uses his power on those he thinks deserve it. he doesn't really need to use his powers to control people anyways, because his appearance and his status as the division's lieutenant is usually enough to get him what he wants.

and that brings him to you. you're so easy to please, so loyal to him to a fault. you're always so obedient, you listen to every command he gives you without asking twice. you're someone he's found to be worthy of his protection, and worthy of being his pet.

#thinking about control devil aki who's lowkey a stalker using his power to watch you and make sure you'll be safe #and he controls people to make things go your way #thinking of the one finger biting scene but with you and aki instead.... #I feel like instead of having a billion dogs at his house aki would have a billion cats lol #he seems like more of a cat person #thinking about going on a casual movie marathon date with aki #the scene where you would ask him if you have a heart and he presses his face to your chest #IF THE READER IS CHAINSAW MAN WHAT ABOUT THE SCENE WHERE THEY FIND DENJI IN THE WAREHOUSE #BUT INSTEAD IT'S AKI HUGGING YOU #you ask him what you'll get to have for breakfast and he'll probably tell you he's the one cooking for you #our brains are so aligned right now #who else sees the vision....... #ask mags #aki <3

[pan-de-queer]

thinking of the supercorp ph uni au again and just like

kara teaching lena about a new level of white privilege that she has in the philippines that lena is aware of bc she learned racism well in the luthor mansion but that privilege is different in the ph.

like it doesn't matter that kara isn't as rich as lena or that she probably has to work to pay for her own tuition, the fact is that kara understands that her nationality and appearance already give her a ridiculous advantage in the ph job market.

and though lena might not feel that white privilege as much within the (many) walls of dlsu, visiting kara in upd and exploring qc and the rest of manila with her introduces her to a whole new level of white privilege and classism that being in metropolis never would've taught her

and when they aren't learning Serious Things about the world around them, then kara's touring lena around her campus and eating lunch with her in the sunken garden or teaching her to bike around the oval or watching student films or plays in whatever theater might be playing one.

in turn, lena sneaks kara into dlsu every chance she gets. lena introduces kara to bloemen and agno and makes her giggle every time they pass through the warp zone and introduces her to the turtles that were moved from the amphitheater.

they explore each others' cities in ways they'd never done before, excited and feeling every bit the young twenty-somethings they actually are. and for once, they don't feel the weight of a family legacy pressing down on them continents away from home

#cw supergirl #supercorp #kara danvers #lena luthor #supercorp ph uni au #oh i am brain rotting over this au SO hard #actual places i know!!! #actual weather i understand!!!! #actual experiences i've gone through!!! #i WILL spam post about this au bc now it's cooking in my brain like a fucking lechon #oooohhhhhh acTUAL FOOD I EAT ON THE REGULAR!!!! #i can make them eat hotdogs like i did in that one fic where two whole people were like 'lol no one eats that in the usa' (but VERY nicely- #-i need to emphasize that they were nice i just felt SOOOO self-conscious after that aklsdjaslkdjs) #anyways in this au kara WOULD eat hotsilog for breakfast along with every -silog variant known (and unknown tbh) to humankind #my writing #queer bread writes

[scoobydoodean]

As someone who grew up in a christian household with very christian and very republican relatives, it is very funny to me for someone to tell me that Dean and Lisa sleeping and living together outside of wedlock, being dual breadwinners, and parenting a child together born out of wedlock who isn’t even Dean's biologically, is about christian and republican values.

Simultaneously, when I am told in very thinly veiled terms that Dean and Lisa are damaged goods whose value as long-term romantic partners was ruined by their existing sexual/romantic histories, I am apparently not supposed to see christian/republican values in that take or think about the sexual purity lectures I got as a child at church comparing me to like a pearl or a rose or some shit getting dirtied by premarital sex until no one could want me anymore.

#the house is also Lisa's the neighborhood is Lisa's Dean cooks the breakfast like SHE took HIM in she's the primary breadwinner #i know people who would be sooo weird about this. They'd be like Scandal! She dares to have something not provided by a MAN???? #How DARE she have a home she built without a man and then invite a man #she is not married to into it!!! Having filthy evil sex outside of marriage! #i mean if you see this I already told you personally how I feel privately but like feel free to lmk what nuance I am missing to this lol #spicy spicy ghost pepper extract #2nd part is actually so bad that even many christian groups themselves have depopularized it and shame the past groups for those lectures

[countess-of-edessa]

im aware that this is just like,,,the nature of food. but it’s kind of galling when something takes 5+ hours to make and the family member who had the least to do with its creation eats seventy five percent of it in fifteen minutes

#this is about my father eating like 35/50 of the pot stickers my sister spent all day cooking (there are four people in our family) #but it’s also about my father eating approximately the same proportion of the peirogis we make on Christmas Eve #(we being my mother sister and i while my father plays video games) #and also how my mother made him dinner and made me a separate thing i like very much the other night and he ate both #pretty much every day i eat five potato chips for breakfast and then like fifteen more for dinner lol #that’s fine no need to get fat over the summer #im buying a bathing suit from an asian company so i want it to fit my large American body lol #i wouldn’t want to have sons for many reasons but one being that men eat too much and it’s gross #And no men you don’t really need to eat that much sorry you’re not Michael Phelps and being male doesn’t mean you automatically need 4x #more calories than the average woman. It’s like maybe a little more than 2x + whatever’s needed when exercise is factored in #(Like 1200-1400 vs 2500-2800 i think) #If I had a husband and more than one male child I would need to make an honestly insane amount of food and then still not get to eat anythi #because it doesn’t matter how much you make. my mom makes a lot of food. If there’s still dinner and it’s something my father likes #he will just take all of it. I can’t imagine if there were other men in our family I think my sister and I would have starved to death lol

[femvaylin]

*eats nothing but ultraprocessed microwave food, snacks packed with food dyes, and takeout* why do I have depression and adhd

#i get it it's very tempting these foods are LITERALLY designed to get you addicted #it's not your fault but it IS your responsibility to do better for yourself and your loved ones #this isn't even my most controversial opinion #addition: i don't mean you should be eating nothing but organic vegetables and grass-fed beef #sure that would be ideal but that's beyond the economic means of most people especially if you're feeding a family #just. regular normal food made from ingredients. #it doesn't have to be fancy literally just boil some potatoes and roast a chicken idc?? #make a bean soup or whatever #i probably spend less than two hours a week cooking and eat basically exclusively homecooked meals #it's SO MUCH cheaper too #i do a big cook once or twice a week for dinner and make snacks/lunch/breakfast daily #i basically eat OMAD during the week though but on my days off i'll eat several meals

[captaindibbzy]

There is easy low hanging fruit here, especially about the US and salty tea. And I'm so SO tempted.

But also I'm super in to tea and I'm bored.

The perfect cup of tea is how you want to drink it, and if you do not LIKE tea then drinking it a different way, or a different kind of tea, vastly changes it.

A pinch of salt makes things less bitter, this trick also works with coffee. But other things that affect taste are tempriture, length of time it brews, where the tea was grown, the climate, the soil, and how big the leaves are. Some of the cheapest tea has little more than dust in the tea bag while more expensive teas you will notice have more structure to the leaves.

Tea brewed in colder tempeitures needs longer and creates a different taste. It may require more tea to get the specific flavour you want, and generally it is less bitter for it. Similar thing to spices where if you cook them, use them hot, toast them first, etc, you get a different set of flavours to using them cold.

Like wine, tea can have lots of flavour profiles and colours. Assam for example is very dark, malty, and strong, it can get quite bitter. Ceylon is much lighter. Darjeeling is good with lemon, but Assam is better with milk, in my humble opinion. Lapsang Sushong is very smokey. Earl Grey

Most people will drink a mix. English breakfast is usually a mix of Assam, Ceylon, and Kenyan. Earl Grey is flavoured with bergamot.

White, green, and black tea all come from the same plant, just different parts of it, treated differently. Black tea can take a higher tempriture, but boiling water on green and white tea will scorch the leaves and make it very bitter. Agitating the tea can also have this effect as it releases more tannin.

As a general rule there is a tea for everyone, and a way to drink it that you will enjoy, whether that's hot, cold, mixing it with spices, flavourings, fruit, milk, sugar, lemon, and yes, even a pinch of salt.

I would not, however, recommend tea that has been in the Boston harbour.

#captain reads the news

[kissitbttr]

this is miguel o’hara being a dick

pairing: miguel o’hara x fem!reader

-

miguel knows he’s fucked.

he has been neglecting you, putting his work above your needs and ditched on dates he can’t count with his fingers. at first you were okay, given that you’re dating such a busy man like him, you understand the consequences.

but you’ve had enough. there were nights where you cooked dinner, only to be left untouched by him or where you softly cried yourself in the middle of the night because he was still out. the only time he comes home is when you’re already asleep, then he left to the HQ in the morning before you’ve gotten the chance to wake up.

you confronted him about this. paid a visit to his office before going to work. Jess and Lyla had warned you to not disturb him but you managed to make them back off with a single frightening look.

yes. they are scared of you. a lot of them are. they do not want to test you at all.

the moment you stepped into his office, he didn’t even bother to look. eyes were just too focused on his work that he assumed Jess was the one who walked in.

“oh, you’re fucking your co-worker now?” your tone laced with sarcasm and anger with arms crossed over your chest,

hearing the familiar voice, he had never whipped his head so fast. “y/n? what are you doing here?”

“well” you start, heels clicking against the floor as you step towards him. “since my boyfriend has been MIA for almost a week i figured i should stopped by.”

his head shook, turning his focus back to what he thought mattered most. “not right now, mi amor. I’m working.”

“i can see that, dumbass” you respond in a cold tone. frowning as to why he couldn’t take one second off from that god damn screen. “you and me are going to get breakfast together. now. before i go to work.”

“i told you I can’t. I’m busy” he replies, brushing you off with his hand. “next time.”

“i’m a busy woman too!” your voice shakes, wanting so bad to scream at him and throw that tiny desk at his head. “but I always want to make time for you, Miguel!”

no response. he muttered something under his breath but you couldn’t hear him.

un-fucking-believable

“you’re such a fucking asshole, you know that?” tone laced with venom as you spit the words. clenching your fists by your side as you struggle to hold back the tears. “i feel like this relationship is one sided, the only person that is truly making an effort is me. you don’t—“

Miguel couldn’t take it anymore. he threw a desk and it went flying, thankfully it didn’t hit you. though your eyes went wide in shock, a loud gasp left your lips as you covered your mouth with your hands.

“you’re right! I don’t! I don’t care about some silly little fucking breakfast when the universe depends on me!” he pointed at himself as his irises turned red when he looked at you. his breathing went heavy and he still wasn’t aware how scared you were at him at that point.

“do you have any idea how fucking hard it is to keep all this shit together?! how many people will die if i don’t do what i gotta do! I don’t always like it, y/n but i have to do it! and here you are trying to play house with me it’s fucking pathetic!” he scoffed, putting his hands on hips.

oh he did not realize how much his words hurt.

the room was filled with silence. you stared at him in disbelief but remained a stoic expression. you were taught better than to be weak before any men. Miguel was no exception. your mother would be disappointed if you let a man win.

“wow” you breathed, nodding. “that was a good speech actually, the longest one I’ve ever heard you talking” you tried to sound sarcastic but how you felt and how you sounded failed you.

Miguel was quick to notice this and his features quickly soften. he reached out quickly to hold you.

“cariño i—“

“I’m returning back to my apartment by five. do not fucking look for me” it was final. the way you said it, how your eyes remained empty as you spoke to him. Miguel knew better than to test you,

but he just did and now he’s paying the price,

his heart broke when he heard you said that. you were so tired of him and you just wanted him back. you want your man back but he couldn’t see how that mattered to you.

“baby, please—“

you held your hand as you turned around. “don’t you even think about sending Jess or Miles my way.”

with that you walked out of his office without uttering another word. leaving him speechless and heartbroken. he knew better than to follow you out, it would just make things worse. he was just going to let you cool off.

he didn’t know how long it was gonna take.

it has been almost a month that you two have been living separately. and he’s losing his mind. he can’t sleep, he can’t eat, he can barely walk out of the house without seeing all the things that remind him of you. the team even sensed something is wrong because he has been more short tempered than before and it almost made the rest of spider society terrified of talking to him.

he’s gotten more violent, that’s for sure. every enemy he encountered, he would leave them bleed with their faces unrecognizable. it was his way of taking his stress out. not exactly healthy but it’ll do for now.

but he thinks that this has gotten too far. he misses you terribly, your scent, your laugh, your voice, your body, and mostly… your pussy

God, the amount of times he sniffed your panties while he jacked off as the image of you clouded his mind was simply not enough.

and now here he stands before your apartment door. dressed nicely in a white buttoned up shirt with his sleeves rolled to the elbows and a pair of black pants. his ring cladded fingers nervously grip around the boquete as the other hand shoved into his pocket.

Miguel had never been this nervous before. toeing his shoes and tapping his toes against the floor rapidly. it’s probably already been fifteen minutes that he’s standing like that staring at your door. thinking far too carefully what he wants to say.

he decides it’s now or never as he raises his fist and knock softly against the wooden door, hoping that you’re home.

“coming!” he hears your voice, his stomach somersaults hearing that after what it felt like a thousand year. “i am so hungry, why are you delivery guys always taking so—“

soon as you open the door, you freeze. definitely not the takeout delivery boy and instead it’s the one person you’ve been avoiding for God knows how long.

Miguel’s mouth hangs open slightly as he slowly taking in the sight of the gorgeous woman before him. you put on your favorite lime green night gown that stops just above your knees with a white silky robe, your hair fall down gracefully. natural curls framing your face. eyes glinting under the light, he almost falls to his knees and thank the Lord for your existence.

beauty doesn’t even begin to describe how you look tonight.

Miguel realizes how he probably looks like an idiot. clearing his throat to regain his composure as he smiles awkwardly at you. “Hi.”

you stare at him as your features then showcase a displeased expression. “what are you doing here?”

you’re leaning your body against the doorframe, arms crossed in annoyance. eyes flickering from his face to the flowers he’s holding and back up to his eyes. as much as you hate to see him, you can’t help that little feeling of butterflies in your stomach when you see the flowers he’s holding.

tulips. your favorite

he takes a one step closer to your frame, breathing out a sigh as he looks down at you. “I’m sorry, mi amor.”

that earns a scoff from you, looking away. “good start.”

“i was a horrible boyfriend.” he admits, gulping as he sees how sadness and exhaustion taking over your face just like that. “you don’t deserve that. what i said to you that day… none of it was true. you were not… pathetic, nor were the idea of having breakfast together… I appreciate every single thing we’ve done together, baby. believe me, por favor…”

a hard stare is the only thing he gets from you. the way your lips form into an angry pout and how your eyes seem to get tired and bored from his confession.

you’re a difficult person to please. he knows that.

“i know that being stress is no excuse of what I’ve done… I should’ve—fuck I should’ve done better. a month without you was like hell, mi corazon. ay, me sentí como si estuviera perdiendo la cabeza.” he sighs in frustration, head shaking as he recalls many sleepless nights. “i love you so so much. i do not want to go through that again … i know that it’s going to take forever to get your trust back and everything, but i swear on my mother’s grave that i—“

“stop talking”

he shuts his mouth after that. eyes looking up to you when he realizes you’re talking to him after a prolonged silence that’s taking over.

seeing how broken he looks almost feels like your heart got plucked. as mean as you are or as much as you wanted to look like you don’t care, you can’t when it comes to Miguel. you love this man far too much and despite his cold cold persona, that’s a huge sweetheart underneath.

“you hurt me, Miguel.” eyes casting down the floor as you try to keep your voice low. “you threw a desk to my direction…”

he shakes his head at that, resisting the urge to cradle your cheek. “lo siento, mi amor. I didn’t mean—“

“yes i know, i heard you.” you sigh, eyes closed momentarily. “you scared me”

Miguel feels his heart breaks when he hears how your voice breaks. he carefully lifts his hand to softly palm your cheek, thumb grazing against the skin. he exhales a soft sigh when you aren’t pushing him off.

“I didn’t mean to do that to you, my love. fuck, I’ve hurt you. i will never forgive myself for that. i was supposed to be the one who protect you and i was being a huge asshole.”

“a cute one though” you pout at him,

he chuckles at that, feeling the tension between you two are finally cutting down. “you’re too sweet, baby… after all i had done to you”

“nothing compared to how you treated me for the past two and a half years.” you smile sweetly at him, hand wrapping around his wrist. feeling at home once he holds you in his palm. “still a good man.”

he shakes his head in disagreement. “no, no that doesn’t excuse it… i was in the wrong.”

you hum in response, looking at the pretty flowers still in his hand. “are those for me?”

he nods with a smile, “you’re my only woman, no?”

you bite the inside of your cheek as you smile, taking it from his grasp as you sniff the pretty petals. “i love them. thank you.”

he once again goes quiet, taking another step closer. eyes looking down at your glossy lips and he can’t take it anymore. he doesn’t care if he’s stepping boundaries here. “i miss you, cariño. can i show you just how much?”

his offer sends shiver down your spine, making it impossible for you to stand still. Miguel always knows your sweet spot, how to make your knees feel wobbly without having him to touch you.

you do miss him touching you,

“i have a ballet class to teach tomorrow, papi. Saturday morning class, you remember ?” a pout formed on your lips, yet you still allow him to pull you close to him as he closes the door behind. “plus don’t you have work too? i bet Jess needs you.”

Migue nearly growls at you calling him ‘papi’. his jeans growing tight as you look up to him with doe eyes that you know he loves. though sometimes, you don’t understand the effect you have on him.

“that can wait… you’re more important to me than anything” he whispers, giving your open hand a kiss. large palm coming down to grip your waist, giving it a light squeeze. “do you want me too?”

you respond with a slow nod, biting back a smile as you interlock your hand with his pulling him inside. his smirk grows wider as he leans over to capture your mouth in his,

“let me fuck you real good then we can come home, eh mi vida?” he promises against your lips, slipping your soft silky robe off of you before picking you up in bridal style causing to shriek and giggle,

“i wanna hear you scream my name.”

-

part 2?

#miguel o’hara blurbs #miguel o’hara smut #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o’hara angst

[mayra-quijotescx]

:/

not instagram recommendeds shaming me with that video of Anthony Bourdain saying 'if you can't cook a few basic meals for yourself and your friends, yeah, you should be ashamed of yourself" right after I spent almost 20 minutes trying to make a pasta recipe I'd just seen only to have to feed the entire damn thing to the garbage disposal because I got the ratios too far off

and yes I know that video was out of context. look at me. do I look like someone who remembers how to care.

#all that work just to have to eat the same thing I had for breakfast and lunch but with a sink full of uselessly messy dishes #if I can't cook worth a damn can I at least be satisfied with having to live off of bare minimum depression shit and food other people made #food cw #well really if it counted as food I wouldn't be making this post now would I

[trainer-aer]

🚫Don't date people who refuse to learn how you like your eggs cooked. 🍳

#this sounds like some deep proverbial shitposting but honestly #my abusive ex just decided how he was going to cook my eggs when he made breakfast #and I had to just smile and pretend I liked them because he would get so angry at me if I ever mentioned things like that #he would scramble them in loads of butter and I'm not a scrambled egg person #I'm an omelette person #he never bothered to learn how to make my eggs the way I liked #and he was so insistent on cooking breakfast and made a big deal about how nice of a thing he was doing #it wasn't just the eggs either #he decided his way of doing things in the kitchen was right and however I wanted was ridiculous #it didn't matter if I asked him or showed him how I'd prefer things #because he didn't give a crap about me #he was a narcissist and only cared about himself #aer talks #so yeah. #don't date people who refuse to learn how you like your eggs.

[eyivibyemi]

✧ I won’t really write descriptions for these, but see original post tags for explanation/commentary on the song snippet ✧

#beepo tag #another one similar to the boiled egg for breakfast song snippet where it's just.. somehting I hum in the kitchen inspired by what I am #actually doing. extremely straightfroward. #I am seriously afraid of meat based illness though and do always overcook it. Even though I prefer steak medium rare and am very #sensitive to meat being ''tough'' or hard to chew. that only applies when OTHER people who are procfessional chefs and actually #know what they're doing cook it. when I cook it (has no training. is not chef) then I have to just cook it until it turns into litt #le evil bricks of charcoal so all of the microscopic bastards out to get me are well and surely perished #this is also one of those ones that sounds familir to me for some reason but I can't tell if it's because I've subconsiously picked up the #tune from somewhere else or if it's just one of those things where you hear something multiple times while recording it and then it starts #to sound like something you've heard before because you HAVE heard it before but only because you've played it for yourself #the age old dilemma #inconsequential anyhow. i dont think anyone takes experiemental joke music recorded in like 10 minutes or less that seriously #i doubt copyright people would be after me even if I somehow accidentally replicated a song exactly lol #anyway ghjhbj

[thef1diary]

Little Big Fan | Three

— Little Big Race

Series Masterlist

wc: 2.4k

Usually, you had a hard time waking your daughter up, and unfortunately she got that habit from you. It was something your mother laughed at a lot whenever you told her about it. She would always say, "you were a troublesome child so now you have a troublesome child but she's cuter."

Today was a different story, Isabella was the one waking you up. "Mama, mama, mama, wake up, we have to see Maxy race today!" She jumped up and down on the bed even though you've tried to tell her not to.

Groaning, you peeked out the blanket to see the biggest toothy smile on your daughter's face and it should've been enough to wake you up. You looked over and saw the time, it was way too early for her to be this energetic. You still have no idea how she musters up so much energy in her little body.

"Bella, qualifying is seven hours away, let's sleep a little longer?" You asked and easily wrapped your arms around your little one. Covering her in the blanket, you hoped to at least get another hour of sleep.

It took her less than two minutes to fall back asleep in her mother's arms. That habit, was from her father who never had an issue of being unable to sleep quickly.

The hour passed by rather quickly, and this time Isabella woke up as soon as she felt you getting off the bed. The giddy excitement was still there and rightfully so but it was a little calmer than an hour ago.

Since you only had to order room service instead of cooking breakfast, the morning was a lot less stressful for you. As soon as Isabella was finished eating breakfast, she ran to her little suitcase and took out her outfit for the day.

Once you helped her change, your little girl was decked in a blue dress with red glittery clips in her hair according to her wishes, her reason being, "Maxy always wears red and blue."

Soon enough, you two were enroute towards the track. You had gotten your passes when you first checked in at the hotel because Max had dropped them off before you arrived.

It was simple enough finding your way towards the entrance, but it was a whole different story after. There were so many people, albeit less than outside, and they all looked like they knew where they were going.

Holding Isabella's hand tightly, you continued walking in hopes to figure out where you're supposed to go. "Where's Max, mama?" Your daughter asked but you didn't have an exact answer.

"Hopefully somewhere around here, angel." You contemplated calling him, unsure whether or not he'd be busy. But then again, if he is then he won't pickup so there was no harm in trying.

Keeping your gaze on Isabella, you called him. After two rings, he picked up, "Hi, I was just about to call you, are you here?" You could hear him panting on the other end as if he ran to pick up your call, but you decided not to comment on it.

"Yeah, I don't know exactly where we are though," He laughed on the other end, "it's okay, just describe the area and I'll come find you." 

You did as he instructed and Max was walking towards you within three minutes. However, he was not alone, there was another man in different coloured teamwear walking next to him. 

Isabella's smile grew when she spotted Max but since you were holding her hand, she couldn't run towards him. Max crouched down and held his hand up so Isabella could give him a high-five. 

The man standing next to him the same, and Isabella was mesmerized, gasping, "Daniel Ricciardo." She probably butchered the pronunciation of his surname but he didn't seem to mind.

Max shook his head, "no, Isabella, he's Daniel Avocado." The comment made Daniel burst out laughing, and you couldn't help but join in. 

The sound of your laugh directed Max's gaze towards you and once it was on you, it was stuck there. Even when Daniel nudged him and asked, "introductions?" 

A few seconds passed by without Max saying anything so to save him from further embarrassment, Daniel decided to take the liberty of introductions. Once you introduced yourself to him, Daniel had a knowing smile on his face. 

"So you're the one who's daughter ran away because of Max," he chuckled while your cheeks grew red in embarrassment, "unfortunately yes, how did you hear about that?" You asked, having an idea that Max probably told him.

But the answer Daniel gave you was surprising, "I've heard the story around ten times so far since someone keeps bringing you up in conversations." 

Max's eyes widened but you laughed, "is that so? Well Isabella hasn't stopped talking about Max either." 

You and Daniel collectively looked at Isabella who was still starstruck by not one but two drivers, the shock of being in the paddock finally catching up to her. Then the two of you looked at Max, who was also unusually quiet according to Daniel, and burst out laughing once again.

"Looks like both of them had too much to say and now it's not enough," Daniel commented and you agreed with a nod. "Your daughter is adorable by the way," he added to fill the silence and nudged Max harshly when you looked at her. 

"How about I show you around?" Max finally found his words, and you looked at him skeptically, "I don't want to take up your time if you have something else to do." 

"I've got some time, plus it would be very unfair if you came all the way here and I didn't spend time with you and Isabella." Max didn't wait for a response from you, instead turning his gaze towards your little one, "right?" 

Isabella gave him a sharp nod, and you couldn't help but smile as you saw the two interact. "Alright then, lead the way." 

It took him thirty minutes to show you around the paddock, but he mainly focused on the RedBull Energy Center, as that was where all the driver's guests could relax and enjoy some team catered meals.

Isabella asked him all sorts of questions, and Max even stopped for an extra minute to grab some noise cancelling earmuffs for her little ears. 

Your eyes widened when he placed them on her head, mentally cursing at the fact that out of all the things you could've forgotten, it was the headphones. Once again, before you could hide your expression, Max noticed it and muttered, "it's okay, that's why we have them here." 

He explained that since it was his home grand prix—something you didn't know until he mentioned it—most of the fans were rooting for him. 

Then, Max was approached by someone from his team, telling him that he was needed back in the garage. The rest of the day passed by quite fast. You watched qualifying from the hospitality as per Max's suggestions. 

As the session continued, you slowly understood some of the terminology, but it would still take a few more races to fully understand what is going on. On the other hand, Isabella clapped happily every time Max's RedBull passed by, and you even joined her after a few times. 

—

It is race day. You and Isabella were back in the paddock and this time you had figured out where to go. You were proud of yourself for navigating the area after only being shown around once. You reached later than you hoped due to the traffic, but fortunately, there was still a while before the race began.

Max had told you to meet him near the garages and when you neared them, you could see him speaking expressively to a small group of people. Based on their outfits, you knew they were drivers. The only one you remembered other than Max was Daniel, as you've met him yesterday. 

"Mama, walk faster," your daughter urged, her pace fastened as soon as she spotted Max, tugging you along. You were glad that she didn't leave your hand. 

"Maxy!" Your daughter cheered as soon as she was in hearing range of the drivers. They all collectively turned towards the noise, Max's face lighting up as soon as his gaze landed on you two. 

"Isabella!" Max cheered with the same amount of energy, and you let go of your daughter's hand so she could run up to him. 

He greeted you as well, taking a step closer to you and with a sheepish smile on his face he spoke, "I got something for her." Max said quietly enough so Isabella didn't hear him, since he wanted your approval first before he revealed his surprise. 

You nodded, encouraging him and with a big smile he placed a cap on Isabella's head, surprising her. She took it off to look at it and when she saw his driver's number on the cap, she gasped.

Then, she placed it back on her head and turned to look at you, "mama, look!" You chuckled, "very nice, what do you say, angel?" 

Isabella didn't think twice before hugging him, "thank you, thank you, thank you!" 

Max held out another cap for you, and before you could say anything he added, "I need everyone to know who you're cheering for." Deciding to tease him you responded, "what if I want to cheer for Daniel?" 

You saw his smile drop, making you break out into a smile to let him know you were just joking. You pointed to the number on the cap, "number 1 driver, yeah,” you stated, the implication of him being the number one driver both literally and figuratively was heard loud and clear.  

"Mama," Isabella grabbed your attention, pointing at the driver in a red suit that you've yet to be introduced to. "Lightning McQueen," she added, making the group of drivers around you laugh at her words. 

Charles pointed at himself, "me?" he looked at you for an answer and you nodded, "yeah, can you really blame her though, you're all decked out in red." 

As if you were lying, he looked down and then shrugged, "fair." 

Isabella was content with being the center of attention between the drivers that you now know the names of; Charles, Lando, Alex, and George.

Max pulled you aside. "I wanted to ask you this yesterday but we didn't have time. Do you think Isabella would like it if I let her sit inside my car?" 

Your mouth quite literally dropped open, and you had to blink a few times as if it would make you understand his words better. "Huh?" is all that left your mouth. 

"My car? Is she going to like it?" He asked again and you nodded, "she would love that, are you even allowed to do that?" 

He chuckled at your question, "it's my car, I think I can do anything I want with it." 

Before he could turn around to speak to Isabella, you reached for his hand to stop him, "Max, you have no idea how much this would mean to her." He nodded in understanding, "make sure to take lots of pictures." 

You heard her squeal in excitement as soon as Max asked the question, watching her eagerly nod. You followed them into the garage, heart warming at how Max held Isabella's hand the entire time. 

With the way Isabella hasn't stopped smiling, you would think her smile was permanently stuck on her face. You took loads of pictures, a few even with Max's helmet on her head that was way too big for her. 

Even the team principal, Christian Horner, stopped for a moment to look at the joy on both Isabella and Max's face. It would make one think that it was Max’s first time around a F1 car as well.

By the time the race started, Isabella's energy had significantly drained, but she remained awake for the entirety of the race. Watching the race from the garage unlocked a different joy on her face, and she would cheer when Max came into the pits for fresher tyres. 

As soon as her eyes drooped, something would occur in the race that would cause her to brighten up again. Max barely had to overtake as he started off in pole position, only needing to pass the other drivers after coming out of the pitlane. 

Just like Isabella, your eyes didn't waver away from the race despite how fast your heart was beating due to nervousness about the drivers' speeds. 

You knew they were the best of the best, very professional, but ever since you've gotten to know them personally, you couldn't help but worry for them. Especially Max. 

Turns out, you didn't have to worry too much as Max crossed the finish line first, winning the race in front of his home crowd. 

Everything after that was a blur. You just remember Christian leading you towards the crowd underneath the podium, ensuring that no one had the audacity to push or shove you. Isabella was safely in your arms, watching the celebrations with wide but sleepy eyes. 

As soon as she saw the trophy being handed to Max, she rested her head on your shoulder and was out like a light. 

Once the champagne was sprayed, you made your way through the crowd, walking towards the exit. Your daughter was sound asleep and you didn't want the noise waking her up and disturbing her much needed rest. 

Other than the one extra hour of rest in the morning, she hadn't taken any naps since she was mesmerized by everything around her. Now, since it was all over, all you focused on was getting back to the hotel. 

As soon as Isabella was comfortably in bed, you decided to take a shower to wash away all the built up and dried sweat. While you were busy, your phone rang with two calls, both from Max, that were inevitably sent to voicemail. 

After your shower, you ordered some food and turned on the tv in the other room. Around fifteen minutes went by before there was a knock on your door. Thinking it was room service with your dinner, you opened it without checking who it really was.

Max was stood on the other side, changed out of his race suit but still in a Redbull polo.

Taglist: (let me know if you want to be added or removed) @xjval @mrsmaybank13 @cherry-piee @urfavnoirette @solphin @burningcupcakefire @nessacarty1 @dreamsarebig @omgsuperstarg @fanficweasley @redbullgirly @llando4norris @minskzy @wonnou @randomgirlnumber13 @dark-night-sky-99 @chanshintien @leilanixx @gisellesprettylies @peachiicherries @monsieurbacteria6 @67-angelofthelordme-67 @arian-directioner @loliaa @distancedss @bache3 @morenofilm @sachaa-ff @lighttsoutlewis @teamnovalak @casperlikej @lexiecamposv @sadg3

#little big fan fic #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #thef1diary fic #max verstappen fluff #max verstappen x you #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen fanfic #max verstappen fic

[gojorgeous]

if gojo has a wife he's acting one of two ways:

He gushes about you constantly. i mean, you cannot get this man to shut about about his wife. he's obsessed- literally lives and breathes for you. he's talking about how cute you are, how adorable it is when you wake up early to cook breakfast, how you wear the cutest clothes, how you pack him the best lunches. he will yap to anyone around him about how much he loves you. nanami is about to slam his head into a wall every time gojo so much as approaches and his students have learned to just tune him out.

He never mentions you. loves you so so so much, but never really sees a reason to bring you up when he's at work or with his students. would of course talk about you if the topic came up, but so far... it hasn't. when the topic does come up one day, it's something small. he says some shit like "i can't wait to get home. my wife is making my favorite for dinner." and his students just fucking lose it. except megumi- he's known the whole time LMAO. everybody suddenly wants to know everything about his mysterious wife and he's kind of bewildered, but is completely willing to show you off. when he arrives home that night it's with over half a dozen people behind him, all of whom want to meet you. he just offers to order take out lol.

#either way he's a doofus #gojo #gojo fluff #jujutsu kaisen gojo #gojou x reader #satoru gojou #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #jjk gojo #gojo x reader #jujutsu gojo #gojou satoru x you #jujustu kaisen #gojou satoru x reader #gojou satoru x y/n #jjk gojou

[vettelsbees]

sugar, spice, and all things nice

max verstappen x baker!reader

fic type: social media au

summary: max is dating a chef/baker and she basically finds out that people hate max and is genuinely shocked

note: i've decided i'm going to learn how to do smau's!! it has been a learning process so far, but hopefully, I start getting better!! this is my first one so if something is weird i am sorry! any constructive feedback is welcome

---

tagged: maxverstappen1

@//yourusername: what i've been up to this week: breakfast foods!!

-@//bakingbyy/n: looks delicious!!

-@//lastlaplando: best wag

-@//maxverstappen1: ❤️❤️❤️

---@//littlelionmax: standard max response

-@//cookingisdelicious: I would kill for this cinnamon roll recipe

@//yourusername posted on their story!

caption: max is a little sleepy after our flight

caption: operation bribe red bull racing to love me is a go!!

@//yourusername posted on their story!

caption: someone is happy to head home!

tagged: @//maxverstappen1

tagged: @//maxverstappen1

@//yourusername: weekend recap with my champ. love you, max!

-@//breadbyy/n: where's our baking mother

-@//championoftheworld: win 80 for max...again

---@//lolalovesf1: he's making the sport boring

-@//roscoandalbonpetsstan: tell him to let someone else win

---@//yourusername: I think he's happy where he is!

-@//berriesandcream: im so sick of his stupid anthem

-@//georgieferrari: i would rather any other team win even freaking haas

@//yourusername posted on their story!

caption: enjoying our week off!!

tagged: @//maxverstappen1

@//yourusername: date nights with max. endlessly happy

-@//purplebulls: he seems like he cant cook

-@//mercedesfan8: happy until he does mad max on your ass

-@//maxverstappen1: ❤️❤️❤️

---@//youngcharles: let someone else win, dick

-@//estelleandf1: he's so smiley around y/n!!

---@//loganraaaamerica: i'd smile if he wasn't winning all the time

---@//theredcar: maybe he'll burn himself and be out for the next gp

@//yourusername: this is your villain. grow up.

comments have been disabled.

#f1 smau #f1 social media au #f1 instagram au #mv1 x reader #mv1 imagine #max verstappen x reader #mv33 x reader #mv33 imagine #max verstappen smau #max verstappen x baker!reader

[a-hazbin-reader]

it's valentines day tommorrow- what's alastor gonna do for reader?

I totally forgot about Valentine's Day-

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Alastor being a cannibal, Alastor scaring people off

Description: 👆⬆️

Alastor 100% forgets that it's Valentine's Day no matter how hard everyone tries to remind him

He can remember everything else important like birthdays, anniversaries, and other key events in your lives

But somehow, he manages to always forget Valentine's Day

He is so fucking smart but somehow so dumb at the same time, Rosie is the one who saves his ass every year

She literally plans it now, inviting him over the day before Valentine's Day

"So Alastor~ How are you going to spend Valentine's Day with Y/N tomorrow~?"

"How kind of you to ask-What was that now?"

"You forgot again. Didn't you."

Long awkward sip of tea

"You hopeless man, here's what you need to do..."

If it were anyone else then Alastor would be fucked but luckily he's tHe RaDiO dEmOn so he's able to scramble together something impressive

You'll never know he forgot

You wake up to your favorite flowers in your bed and all over the hotel, Niffty having a breakdown because she can't clean them up

Not Alastor standing in the kitchen with an apron on, cooking breakfast for the two of you

Kiss the cook? Don't mind if I do~

He won't accept any gifts from you until he's finished giving you the Valentine's Day you deserve

Mostly out of guilt over forgetting tho

After the most delicious breakfast you've had in awhile, he invites you out for a walk

He's shamelessly checking you out the entire morning, visibly approving of your outfit for the day

He takes you to one of the most beautiful and lush places in the pride ring that he can find, adoring the amazed look on your face

You almost feel like the two of you are a normal couple enjoying the day together, not two sinners in hell who are walking through faux earth scenery

If there's anybody else around then he scares them away so that you two can be alone and unbothered

Keeps an arm wrapped around you the entire walk, resting his head on yours because if he looks at you then he'll lose his mind

You just look so fucking cute rn

While it might just seem like a romantic walk, it's all a ruse to get you to a planetarium

Again, there's nobody there because Alastor wants privacy with his S/O

Because there's nobody there, Alastor took the liberty of decorating it in romantic lighting and getting more comfortable seating for the two of you

Seating might be the wrong word

The two of you end up snuggled together in a hammock, gazing up at stars that used to be familiar to you both

If you can name the stars and constellations then Alastor will happily listen while pulling you to his chest

Maybe you two feed each other snacks

"No, I'm not feeding you a finger, I love you, but I'm not touching that."

"You love me? How embarrassing that must be for you~"

"Still not feeding you that."

"Maybe I should eat you instead~"

KEEP IT PG YOU TWO

If you fall asleep then maybe he'll smooch your face a little bit until you wake back up

Maybe you're only pretending to be asleep

But the gifts don't stop there!

When you two leave, he takes you to the radio tower for a romantic dinner, and that shit is CANDLELIT

🕯 🍝 🕯

It is legitimately a lady and the tramp style dinner date with him doting on you the entire time

He's been a suave gentleman the entire day so far, doing everything he can to make you blush and swoon

But when you finally get the chance to give him your Valentine's Day gift, no matter what it is, he's genuinely flustered

Stares at it while blushing in silence for what feels like the longest time

"You got me this..? For me?"

"Who else would it be for?"

Not his tail wagging

Once he composes himself then he invites you to slow dance with him, holding you inappropriately close to him

Good thing you two are alone

Alastor is a fantastic dancer and a handsome man so that alone is enough to make you flustered

But slow dancing with him while he stares at you with that rare soft expression, with love in his eyes???

You're just a blushing puddle in his arms which is totally what he's going for, cooing at you sweetly

And he only makes it worse once he starts whispering sweet nothings in your ear throughout the entire dance, confessing everything he loves about you

Alastor legitimately has his breath taken away when he looks at your face afterward

You look so grateful for all that he's done for you today, but he still feels guilty for forgetting in the first place

When he thinks of your gift then he only feels worse, cupping your cheek gently

"Y/N...I have something to confess to you..."

"This is all last minute because you forgot about Valentine's Day?"

*shocked Pikachu face*

"...how did you know? Did Rosie tell you?"

"Alastor...darling...baby..."

Not your hand pulling on his cheek before giving it a few condescending pats

"You forget every year~"

Oh yeah

"But you always make it the perfect day~"

Brags about what you said to him the next day with Rosie, not at all noticing how done she looks with him

Hnnnng!! I love this man

#hazbin hotel x reader #alastor hazbin hotel x reader #alastor hazbin x reader #alastor x reader #hazbin x reader