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pixie-cocaine · 4 years

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ATEEZ reaction to: their S.O. being a former Playboy model

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A/N: I really did hella research on this because Playboy's rules and shit are a lot more strict and confusing than you'd think. BUT, good news is that you can model for Playboy without having to be a Playboy playmate (which is a lifetime job I think). Anyways, it's kinda long because I like to make each scenario different in terms of style and what you wear, but I hope you enjoy :)

Songs Listened To: Sweet Insomnia - Gallant, mentiras - Alaina Castillo

(Also, mature/explicit so read at your own risk!)

Hongjoong ♡:

• you'd ask him to go get you a shirt from your drawers while you were in the shower

• he'd be going through the wrong one, your underwear drawer, when his finger brushed against the plastic cover of what felt like a magazine

• his curiosity would get the best of him, also the fact that he thought it was porn and he'd be able to tease you about it

• and he'd pull it out

• he definitely wasn't expecting to see you on the front cover, body adorned with silk lingerie that held accents of cherry red ribbon and deftly tied loops. Everything about you was carefully laid on; the flawless red matte lipstick, your hair which fell over your eyes in gorgeous tendrils, even the neatly-placed bunny ears and cotton tail.

• the thing that got him most was how you sat on your knees, a sickly sweet smiling playing on your lips as your hand slipped beneath the thin fabric of your panties

• he almost thought he was dreaming when he saw the title 'Playboy', plastered across the heading in big bold letters

• he wouldn't think twice about throwing the magazine on the bed and waiting for you to come out of the shower to go see why he hadn't given you a shirt like you asked

• when you finally stood in the doorway, robe covering your nudity and an eyebrow raised, Hongjoong would hold up the magazine with a smirk

• "You never told me you were a Playboy bunny"

• "You never asked, and why would I tell your nosy ass anyways?"

• he'd chuckle and you'd finish getting dressed, but he wouldn't stop thinking about it

• you'd end up fishing out your old Playboy outfits to wear for him

Seonghwa ♡:

• you and Hwa would be getting ready for the sexy-themed costume party San had the bright idea of throwing for Wooyoung's birthday party

• since Hwa didn't have any costumes, he'd go with the simple but classic loose black button-up and pants before sitting on the bed, waiting for you to come out of the bathroom

• the sound of your heels clicking on the polished floor had him looking up from his phone, and to say his eyes damn-near popped out of his skull was an understatement

• literally, this man would probably be drooling like a saint Bernard

• you looked like an enchantress; gorgeous royal purple forplay bodysuit, complete with jeweled fishnets, dual cuffs and a cuff collar, the iconic large bunny ears, cotton tail, and redbottoms all had him in a daze

• he literally could've pounced on you right there if he had no sense of self-control

• your smile, god your smile was what set it off. Especially with the way your lips curled delicately and accentuated the bloody red lip tint, a few stray strands of hair kissing at your forehead

• "Do you like it? I used to wear it back when I was a bunny and modeled every once in a while," you'd say, feigning obliviousness to how Hwa drank in your form

• to be honest, Seonghwa couldn't give less of a fuck whether you modeled and strut around in skin-tight clothing for hundreds of hungry eyes

• all he cared about was whether he'd be able to finish fucking you before you were late sifbjeuzysha

• in a nutshell, he absolutely loved the fact that you still had your Playboy bunny outfit, but didn't mind your past contract with them

Yunho ♡:

• you were always the secretive one in the relationship so it was no surprise that one day when Yunho dropped his phone under the bed and sat on his knees to look for it that he found it sitting by a big black box

• just because you were secretive didn't mean he couldn't find a way to get past the point of you hiding it in the first place

• you were in the kitchen at the time, cooking your famous homemade jajamyeon, but Yunho knew you'd come to check on him, so he had to make it quick

• after he finally popped open the stubborn lid, he'd looked in to see something he wasn't expecting to see at all

• magazines, all of them with you in various positions on the covers, sat in stacks to the right of the box. Beside it sat a headband with large familiar bunny ears and.. was that a half see-through bodysuit?

• well, he didn't even have time to identify the rest of it, because the sound of your amused voice filled his ears

• "Yunho, what are you doing?"

• "N-nothing!"

• he'd scrambled to close the box and push it back under the bed, but he would get his fingers jammed in the top, letting out a yelp as it caught on the tender flesh of his digits

• "tsk, tsk, tsk. Clumsy boy.."

• but still, you'd giggle and crouch down to his eye level before removing his hands from the box and rubbing the tips of his fingers

• "I didn't know you were a Playboy bunny"

• was the first thing he asked lmao

• you'd giggle and answer questions about your past contract with Playboy before treating him to your jajamyeon and a band-aid

• it was only when you were cuddled up on the couch did he bring it up again

• "um, babe?"

• "yeah?"

• "would you be fine with it if I asked for you to pose in your Playboy uniform?"

• I swear, this bitch-

Yeosang ♡:

• to be honest, nobody knows how he found out

• this bitch sneaky

• all you know is that he came into the living room where you sat, holding up your folded Playboy uniform and a glass of wine

• "Do me a favor and go put this on, gorgeous. I wanna see how you look in it."

• and that's how you wound up standing in front of Yeosang, occasionally tugging at the bowtie hugging your neck or pulling at the back of your bodysuit

• but Yeosang paid no mind to your fidgeting. He was completely entranced

• he couldn't comprehend your beauty. The black Velvet of your bodysuit wasn't anything special, but the way it framed your curves and stuck to all the right places was enough to make anybody gasp in jealousy. The dual cuffs linked to your wrist added to the whole 'sexy waitress' look, and the bunny ears and cotton tail made you look adorable, all Yeosang wanted was to worship your body and all of your flaws

• which is what he did

• he sat before you, his forehead resting on your stomach as you stood there, a hand on his shoulder for balance that might be needed, and sighed as you savored the feeling of his hands roaming every inch of your body. He started at the stockings; pinching the thin fabric between his forefinger and thumb, before moving up to slide his hands around your waist and finger at the textures of your clothes.

• the rest of the night, he made work of your body

• literally, he was so soft and tender

• he wished he would've seen the photoshoots you'd been in, but overall, he didn't really care

• it was something you liked, and he respected that

• literally, I know this man has a huge body worship kink nsjdkwksj

• you didn't hear it from me

San ♡:

• you both would be watching movies together when you stood up

• "I'm gonna go pee real quick, you can keep it playing if you want."

• and you were outy 😔🤙🏼

• just when he was about to go back to the movie, your phone began to buzz, the screen lighting up along with the vibrations that rattled it's being

• now, San's nosy ass wouldn't wanna be too rude by touching your phone without permission, but he couldn't help checking the caller ID

• his jaw dropped when he saw just who was calling

• 'Playboy 👯'

• was the caller ID

• he kinda would just freeze up and make excuses in his head

• "Nah, that's probably just one of her friends."

• he'd ask you when you came back out, but still tried to make sure you understood that he in fact did not snoop through your shit

• "I'm just curious, that's all. If it's something that you liked to do, then do what you want."

• really supportive, even if you told him that you left that job and they were only calling back to see if you'd pick up a last-minute gig for extra money

• "Baby, I wouldn't care if you decided to go back."

• actually likes the idea a lot

• he'd be searching up your name in Playboy while you were asleep lmao 😂

Mingi ♡:

• you wanted to do something fun towards the end of his birthday party

• so what better way than to blindfold him, sit him in a chair in the middle of the bedroom, and go put on your old Playboy uniform?

• he'd be kinda nervous, but also excited

• the telltale signs of his clammy hands and constant leg jumping gave it away

• maaan you were abouta blow this man's moinnndd

• his head would perk up at the sound of your heels hitting the floor, getting closer with each shaky breath rattling Mingi's chest, his heart threatening to jump out of his ribcage

• one moment his vision was obscured, the next, you were standing in front of him with a hand on your hips, looking like a wet dream personafied

• he literally felt like he might nut in his pants at the mere sight wonfjwjwjw

• hair, messy and tucked behind your ears. Lips, curled in amusement at his shocked expression, painted over with a subtle brown lipstick which glistened in the soft orange glow of the lamplight to your left.

• his eyes traveled lower, almost helplessly

• the black latex bodysuit enveloped your figure, fitted like a second skin, and cupped your hips as you shifted your weight to your left foot. Bunny ears sat atop your head and swayed with your small movements, a tied bow clipped to your throat, and your legs slipped into glossy-looking sheer tights

• Mingi felt like a starved animal, staring at you as if you held the key to his ecstacy

• which, let's be honest, you did

• y'all began to fuck straight after HAJAJAJABDBDJS

• (he definitely liked the idea of your being a Playboy bunny, but was pretty left-leaning to the fact that a bunch of other men probably looked oggled at you back when you did occasionally waitressing)

Wooyoung ♡:

• sooo, Wooyoung is a pretty flexible person (??)

• i mean, he has to when he has the sex appeal of an expensive stripper that always wears a custom-made silver crown when she gets on-stage to show that she's a bad bitch

• so when you and him decided to skip work in favor of booze and some Disney

• he'd be kinda excited when, as you both were talking about stupid shit you did in the past, you brung up the fact that you'd used to model for Playboy

• he'd be a little thrown off at first tho

• "Woah, woah, woah. Like, signature bunny ears and cotton tail Playboy?"

• "Yeah, I did a couple photoshoots for them in my time. Why, do you suddenly have the desire to hurl up your breakfast, lunch, and dinner at the sight of me?"

• "No, no, not at all. That's kinda hot, if I'm being honest"

• not even ashamed that he immediately pulled up your photoshoots and looked through them with you

• "Yeah, see that one? They had me lay in a tub of melted chocolate for it, I'm not even gonna sugar-coat it when I say that it got all up in my hoo-hah"

• "Lucky! I wanna pose in a pool of chocolate like a sexy french girl, too!"

• it'd become an inside joke for you two

• like when you'd complain about it being cold, he'd say some stupid shit like:

• "Playboy bunnies never get cold, you can deal with it"

• it'd be really cute 🥺

Jongho ♡:

• ugh the sweetest baby to ever exist

• for lack of a better scenario, you both would be laying in bed, half-awake, and talking about life in general

• you'd been the one to bring up the topic, considering your usual bouncy, sweet Jongho had been stressed lately

• you wanted to calm him down, relieve him of any exhaustion

• so that's how you ended up in bed with him, limbs tangled together, and your head resting on his chest as he recounted his childish ways of the past

• you'd look up at him with full heart eyes bro

• and I really don't blame you

• and ease him into your own actions

• you'd hesitantly bring up being a Playboy bunny, and bb would immediately sit up and be like

• "Uhhh, pardon?"

• you'd think he was against the idea, but after you sputtered out excuse after excuse, he'd start giggling

• OH MY GOD LET ME KISS YOU JONGHO

• and then once he stopped laughing

• he'd reassure you that it was fine with him

• if you liked doing something, who was he to stop you. Yeah, the idea might be a little iffy to him because he wasn't so keen on sharing you with anybody, but he didn't wanna stop you from being happy and getting ya money

• why? Because uhhhh he's a baby?

• Why would you even ask? That man can do no wrong HE GOES TO FUCKING ELDERLY WOMEN SINGING MEETUPS

• he'd ask you to tell him some funny stories about being a model, and he'd eventually fall asleep due to you running your fingers through his hair

• ugh I'm in my feelings

(oh yah, and sorry for posting this a couple days late lol)

#ateez fluff #ateez yeosang #ateez reactions #ateez #ateez mingi #Ateez hongjoong #ateez jongho #ateez yunho #kpop related #jongho #hongjoong smut #hongjoong #ateez seonghwa #Seonghwa #yunho #i love these babies

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el-moscorrofio-y-el-mercachifle · 3 years

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By "easy" I mean, she had the company and the damning letter in her hands. The expose and revenge could have been much worse for those two in the hands of somebody with more malice. Even they (Armando & Mario) were aware and admitted that buying the mercedes and expensive lunch invites for el cuartel were a small price to pay for all the work B & N had put in and the power they actually had. Also, most of what Armando was going through during that time, came from the paranoia that he [and Mario} created and fueled all on their own. As much as I love Armando, it's hard for me to empathize with him over Betty in this situation given the context. She played him at his own game, and she really didn't have to do much to make him go insane. I mean, she was straight up about Nicholas from the very beginning. A & M chose to ignore what Betty had told them and stirred up a storm in a glass of water all on their own and hurt her in the process. Betty & Nicholas had a brother-sister dynamic/relationship, that would have been so obvious had Armando actually met with Nicholas that even the implication that he was Betty's love interest would have been a joke. But Armando never bothered to get to know Nicholas, even though he was technically working for him, and the fears he had about him taking his company, came from his own prejudice, classism and malice (apart from the guilt and confusion about his feelings for Betty of course). Plus, Betty was going after his rich man ego, she didn't know he actually had feelings for her and that he was mostly affected by losing Betty's affection to Nicholas. Both of them were going through a lot and the whole situation was complicated, but my favorite bit from all that, is how despite all the hurt and mixed emotions, eventually Betty comes to and realizes how seeking revenge didn't help her feel any better about herself, and that was the beginning of her being able to find herself again. Even though the vengeance itself wasn't healthy for anybody, I do think it was an important part of Betty's process for healing. Heartbreak almost killed her the first time around, with Armando, at least she was able to react in some way and defend herself. And well Armando... my man needed the humbling lol. It was chaotic, but ultimately, it helped him get perspective on relationships. Again, we go back to the whole moral ambiguity of it all. No one is free from flaws or errors here. And it's fascinating to see how people interpret and analyze the same things in different ways.

What was so frustrating about Marcela, was that she had so much potential to be a better person. She clearly wasn't an idiot, nor was she trying to be a bad person/bad boss. But her negative traits and environment got the best of her and caused her to lose perspective on the way she treated Betty and handled her relationship with Armando.

LMAO when Mario does that hunchback of Notre Dame impression of Betty 😭🤣🤣🤣You can tell those two enjoyed the hell out of those scenes. JEA and Ricardo talked about how much they improvised and how they were the ones that came up with some of Betty's nicknames on the spot lol. The cutest thing is that JEA said that when Mario left the show, he was so sad because he had so much fun with Ricardo, that he almost wished for Armando to end up with Mario instead of Betty 😅.

I didn’t mean to imply that Armando didn’t need or deserve Betty’s vengeance or that Betty herself didn’t need it. They both absolutely did, and it’s a GREAT part of the novela; it’s amazingly written. Both Armando and Betty needed complete destruction to be able to rebuild themselves back up as improved versions of themselves (as the novela itself put it, they “died”).

It’s true that Betty thought that she was hurting Armando’s economic and masculine ego (by both using “his” money and “cheating” on him with an ugly guy) and that she could have done A LOT worse of economic “damage”, but she was also aiming towards psychological harm— she was constantly setting up perfect scenarios that would lead Armando to believe she was with Nicolás, then acusing him of being “weird” and “crazy” whenever he tried to know what was going on, and twisted things to make it seem he was just seeing ghosts. That’s gaslighting, and I can’t help but feeling bad for him for going through that, even if I still think he deserved and needed the suffering. It’s also true that most damage came from Mario and Armando’s paranoia, but it was a paranoia that Betty was very aware of and decided, conciously, to exploit.

I agree that Armando would have saved a lot of suffering from both of them if he had met Nicolás sooner. Most of his fear, tho, didn’t come from classism or malice— it came from a “profecy” mixed with his jelousy; he only used classism to rationalize his exaggerated reaction because the true root of it was jealousy. He always trusted Betty and never doubted of her nor her family for being of humble means or low socioeconomic class, therefore classism wasn’t the root of his distrust of Nicolas, just a way to rationalize it.

I love it too! Betty needed that revenge to process her feelings, and at the end understood that hurting Armando also hurt her and it was doing no good to any of them. I am not trying to paint Armando as a helpless victim nor Betty as a villain, at all. Both of them did bad things and paid for it all, but it helped them both get the best out of themselves and each other. Also, that board meeting scene was fire 🔥

I agree about Marcela completely. I think the novela handled a cycle for the main three: the Being, the Death, and the Reborn (I call it this way because the novela itself makes a references and metaphors about desth representing a change). Betty and Armando went through the three phases and we saw it (The best example I can think of is of when Catalina said that “if Armando killed [Betty], he’d have to commit suicide later”. The next day, Betty “died” the day of the Letter, saying thise exact words over and over again, and Armando tried to “kill himself” when he understood what he had done; exactly as Catalina had said. What followed was their reborn, for better or worse) but Marcela stayed on the Being phase for the whole novela, and we only saw her move to the Death phase, when she decides to leave her old life behind (Armando and Ecomoda) and therefore “die” (there was a line about Marcela killing herself, a metaphor as well. I think it was the night of the museum, if I’m not mistaken). We can only assume that she’d follow the same pattern and eventually, after some time, would come around to the Reborn phase in which she’d change her mentality and attitude, hopefully for the better like Armando and Betty did.

Lol yesss! Mario and Armando had amazing chemistry, even though they were suuuuch a toxic friendship lol. The ArMario ship took so much force in the fandom after that statement, even though they’d be soooo bad together lol

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purplesurveys · 3 years

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1154

[created by: joybucket]

What was the last thing you ate? We had adobo for dinner. I didn’t find it filling though, so I might get some of my mom’s bread pudding sometime tonight as a midnight snack.

What is one thing you're a hoarder of? Receipts, for no reason whatsoever other than the frequent nagging feeling at the back of my head telling me I might need to pull out a certain receipt one of these days just in case I get into any issues, so I end up keeping all of them.

Do you collect magazine clippings? No. I used to but they’re all gone now.

What rating do you normally give surveys? I just take them on here. I visit Bzoink pretty often but I never made an account so I haven’t been able to rate the surveys I’ve taken.

Name someone you wish acted the way he/she used to. I wanna say Gab, but she’s better off figuring out who she wants to be and is meant to be for now. Otherwise, I don’t really have an answer to this; all the people I know are pretty dang fantastic.

Have you ever worked in food service? No.

What was your favorite job that you've had? I’ve only had one job, and I definitely can’t complain about it.

Does your stomach hurt currently? Nope. I’m actually on day 2 of my period, but fortunately the pain really ever only takes place on day 1 for me. The rest of my period usually goes smoothly.

What's one medication condition that you have? I don’t have any. I have one medical condition – scoliosis – but I don’t take any medication for it.

Do you forget passwords a lot? LOL yessssss, because websites have varying rules on what they can count as a password – some want 8 characters, some want 12, some want upper case letters, some want a symbol; so even though I use the same password for everything I typically have to make 84954983573475 variations of them anyway that I end up forgetting.

What is the most you've ever weighed? Not sure, maybe a little over 100 lbs.

Do you plan your wedding on Pinterest? No, I never understood how Pinterest worked :/ I lasted all of 5 minutes on there until I felt bored.

Would you want your first child to be a girl or a boy? I’d love a girl.

Who are the cutest babies on Facebook? The Song triplets will always be babies to me, no matter how big they get.

Do you refer to coral as pink, orange, salmon, or coral? Those are four different colors/shades that you’ve just named right there.... < Lmaooooooo same thoughts. I would just call it coral because that’s what it is.

Name someone whom you wish would apologize to you. I have a name in mind and you guys already know who it is. I’m at peace regardless if I get an apology or not (I definitely won’t), though – and I count that as a win. It’s absolutely batshit insane that I never heard one apology but instead got a million “Can’t you give me credit for trying?” I can’t help but chuckle every time I take myself back to those moments. Thankful I got out of there :)

Do you own a record player? I don’t, but I’d love to have one.

Do you have many regrets? No.

Do you wish your regrets would stop coming back to haunt you? I don’t have a lot of them, so I don’t let them bother me to begin with.

Have you had any regrets in the past week? Can’t say I’ve had any.

What do you not know how to say no to? Requests/favors. I’m a people pleaser through and through.

Have you ever been mad at God? Yup, that’s why I let go of religion at a very young age. I was going through shit no kid should’ve been going through and the idea that some deity is making it happen because it was supposed to encourage me have more faith was utterly stupid. I had no problem disowning whatever god I was desperately trying to latch on to by the time I was 10.

If you don't have a car, do you feel like you're missing out? I have a car. I don’t own it, but it was designated for me.

What is your favorite cousin's name? Jereth. I keep forgetting where they got his name from, but it was from like a German movie or something like that.

Who do you wish were your best friend? Hayley Williams.

Would you ever consider moving to L.A.? Never. Just never seemed like my kind of city. Not to mention the amount of Asian/Asian-American hate crimes I’ve been hearing about recently. The US is undeniably out of my list of places I’d want to step foot in, much less live in.

List 5 other names that start with the same letter of your name. Rhiannon, Riley, Rocky, Rachel, and Russell.

Have you ever known anyone who's name started with a "Y"? Yes, I went to college with a girl named Yumi. Yanna is also still a good friend of mine and we catch up every once in a while.

^If yes, what was it? Oops, mentioned them already. There are also a couple more Y people I know but I’m not close to them nor are we in the same social groups, so idk how to classify them.

Did you hear laurel or yanny? It’s been a while since I let myself get carried away by that ~meme, but I think I heard yanny.

Owls or penguins? Penguins. But owls are great too.

What is your go-to comfort food? Probably something with grease that is fried. < This is an awesome answer. Right now though, I’ve been frequently getting spicy tuna salad every Friday to reward myself after a work week.

What is the best coffee shop in your town? Tim Hortons. < Tim Hortons is greeeeaaaat, but all the branches are in Metro Manila and not at all near me :( That said, my pick would probs be Starbucks. There’s a new local coffee shop where I live called Ghost Coffee and I had been meaning to check it out, but quarantine part two happened.

Do you prefer Pinterest or Tumblr? Tumblr, but then again don’t they have different features and purposes?

Do you think blonde is the best hair color? No.

In your opinion, what is the best hair color? I don’t think that there really is a “best” hair color... < Same. Tbh I’ve noticed that I only ever get attracted to brunettes, but I don’t think that necessarily makes it the best hair color.

If applicable, what is the name of your YouTube channel? I think it’s just my name since my account is linked to my Google.

Do you wear glasses? Yes, but I haven’t worn mine in a while since one of the legs snapped. I’ve been managing well without it, but I plan on getting a new pair soon. At least as soon as I grow the pussy to book an appointment HAHA

What's one nickname you have? Leigh calls me Robs. It’s not my favorite, but Leigh is like a sister to me so she’s the only person permitted to call me such.

What's one thing you miss? Being in crowded places and living in those moments.

Do you have a favorite spot in church? I hate being at a church; but to answer this, my very enthusiastic mom used to always pick the very front and center row for our family to sit at, so you can imagine how glad I am not to have to do this anymore because of Covid :)))

Who was the biggest bully in your high school? Bullies stopped being a thing in high school. All the friend groups just minded their own business for the most part, ours included.

Which news story has still stuck with you years later, and why? Manila hostage crisis. It was really scary and the fact that the entire thing was being streamed live on the evening news at a time when livestreaming was still a fairly unfamiliar concept made it even more unsettling.

Have you ever REALLY had a celebrity crush? On Kristen Stewart and Kate Winslet, yep. These days my eyes are on Kim Seon Ho hahaha, and I also feel a future crush on BTS’ Jungkook coming through.

Did you ever have to wear a school uniform? From preschool to high school. Didn’t have to anymore once I started college.

Do you collect washi tape? No. I neverrrrrrr saw the big deal, but then again I’m probably just not craftsy enough to see the point lmao.

Tell me something random that happened to you today. I took an afternoon nap for the first time in many months, and I woke up feeling completely disheveled and confused about the day and time. It’s been a while since I got that sensation and I did not miss it.

If you're a girl, are you on your period? I am, actually.

Are there any balloons in the room you're in right now? Yeah, the balloons we had set up for my dad for his 50th birthday celebration are surprisingly still alive. We originally had them in our accommodation in Tagaytay, but we brought the balloons home and put them up on the 2nd floor corridor, and they’re still all up there.

Do you have the windows open? I do, because the wind is actually pretty chilly tonight. I’m even wearing a hoodie in freaking April, which never happens.

What's one good name for a new puppy? Depends on their personality. It took hours for us to name Cooper, so it wouldn’t be easy to think of a name for a puppy I’ve never even met.

Would you collect antiques if you were rich? Depends on what kind, but yeah, I might consider it.

Did you dream last night? Yes.

Do you forget dreams or remember them? (or do you not dream?) I remember them in the first few minutes of waking up, but my memories of them gradually fizzle out throughout the day.

What color is your phone? Black.

Do you often have your phone on vibrate? Yes, because I often have meetings and it’s a big nuisance whenever there’s a ringtone that chimes in the middle of one.

Name something that gives you headaches. Working in front of the laptop for too long.

Do you have a secret hiding spot? My car, sometimes.

Have you ever lived in a place that had a secret passageway? Nope.

Did you play with legos as a kid? Yes, but I was never too imaginative for it. I just liked making tall towers and then dismantling them right after.

If applicable, what color is the rim of your bedroom mirror? White.

Can you be scatterbrained? Sure.

#survey #surveys

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becky69lu · 5 years

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Fictober Prompt Day 16: “Listen. No, really listen.”

Marie Kanker x Eddward Vincent (Ed, Edd n’ Eddy)

This was meant to go up on the 16th but I had so much to write for it that it took longer than expected. Oops lmao

"Listen. No, really listen." Edd shut his mouth at her request, flabbergasted at the girl- no woman, in front of him.

Marie Kanker was his kryptonite throughout middle school. She would harass him, assault him and even try to kiss him. When freshman year of high school came around however, she stopped.

While May and Lee ran around chasing Eddy and Ed, Marie was seen making friends with the stoner and art kids. By the middle of sophomore year, May and Lee stopped chasing the boys around too. In fact, the girls treated them like they were any other student.

Eddy and Ed rejoiced at their luck. Edd was just as happy, realizing that the Kanker sisters grew up. They grew out of their childish habits. May had her front teeth fixed, thus fixing her lisp. She joined the cheerleading team and became great friends with Nazz. Edd on occasion would have a civilized conversation with her.

Lee dropped out of high school, opting to get her GED online at home. One day Edd had the courage to ask May at lunch about the sudden disappearance of the red headed sister. May explained how Lee wanted to work and do school at her own pace. Edd was happy for her.

Marie was the most illusive. He rarely saw her in the hallways. He never saw her in classes because Edd took all AP's. Sometimes he'd catch a flash of vibrant blue in the cafeteria. Once in the parking lot he saw her sitting with some kids on the back of a car. They were passing around a blunt, listening to heavy rock music. Edd wasn't familiar with the kids she was with.

It was senior year at this point. Edd submitted his college applications and worked at a quaint bookshop in town in his spare time. By this point in his life, the blue headed Kanker sister had long slipped his mind. He was happy and ready for the next chapter of his life.

One day in the middle of November he was grabbing a book from his locker when he saw a figure push up against the locker next to his. Without a thought, he shoved the book in his bag, shut his locker and looked up at the figure.

He jumped when he realized who he was looking at. His heart started to pound in his chest in a familiar way. He felt a wave of spontaneous recovery as he met blue eyes. This was the first time he had a good look at her in four years.

Her hair was still a vibrant blue color, yet it looked soft and luscious. He was curious on how it could be so nice looking after years of constant hair damage. Her hair was also longer, going slightly past her shoulders. Her right eye was no longer covered by hair, instead pushing gently behind her ear.

Her freckles seemed to have grown in numbers. They were scattered across her cheeks and nose in dozens. Her eyes were a vibrant blue due to the thin line of eyeliner painted on her eyes. She wasn't wearing the signature blue eye shadow he remembered.

Her clothes seemed to grow more feminine but stayed in the same punk rock style. Her skinny jeans were a faded grey with purposeful holes and tears. She was wearing a black spaghetti strap tank top with a baggy black and white flannel over it. Around her neck was a thin black choker. She was wearing black converse to top off the whole outfit.

After evaluating the girl he once knew, he met her eyes with slight fear. He knew he shouldn't be frightened by her. Marie was barely a topic anymore. Although she was a notorious Kanker sister, now-a-days she kept to her group of friends and rarely caused trouble. He heard when she did get in fights it was almost always for a reason.

He knew she wouldn't hurt him. It was just the fear of the unknown.

"Hiya Double D." This was a phrase she used to say in a high pitched teasing sneer. Now, her voice and tone was much different. It was the first time he heard her speak in years. Her voice was velvety soft and much more mature. She said the phrase in such a melancholy tone that it took him by surprise.

"Oh! Uh.. Hello Marie! Lovely day, correct? What brings you to my corner?" Edd winced at how wordy he was being. He supposed it was a nervous tick but it was still embarrassing.

"I just.. I need to talk to you for a minute. If that’s alright." She asked sincerely.

She had her arms wrapped around herself, a subconscious sign of discomfort. Edd nodded. She stepped away from the locker, starting to walk towards the end of the hallway.

Edd followed her curiously, keeping a bit of distance away from her. On the way to their destination, Edd saw Eddy and Ed staring at the pair in shock.

"What?" Eddy mouthed to Edd in anger and confusion. Edd understood his friends confusion, considering he was just as confused. "I'll talk to you later." Edd mouthed back as clear as he could. He then turned back to see where Marie went.

She was slightly hunched over as she walked, not caring about her bad posture. She finally led him to an empty classroom. Edd was always very nervous about entering a classroom without permission.

He was curious about Marie though. This time his curiosity outweighed his anxiety.

He walked into the room, shutting the door gently behind him. When he looked back he noticed Marie sitting on a desk, playing with her fingers.

"So listen, I need to say some things." She started.

"If you need help with homework or college applications I'm sure I could ask Ms. Smith to help you out." Edd started to get nervous again as word vomit fell out of his mouth.

Marie looked up at him in confusion. "Homework help? No I need-" "Need help with exams? I'm sure-"

This time, Edd was cut off. Marie hopped off the desk.

"Listen! No, really listen." Edd was finally able to stop talking. The woman approached him, standing a few feet a part for his sake. Edd appreciated that.

"For an assignment in English, Mrs. Clark asked us to write an apology letter to someone we wronged. I would've just thought of it as dumb, but Mrs. Clark is my favorite English teacher. She sat with me and explained that next year we'd all be gone for college. She asked if I had hurt anyone from school. When I told her yes, she told me it'd get weight I didn't know was there off my chest. And make the person I hurt feel better." Marie explained, putting her hands in her back pockets casually.

Although her posture was relaxed, it was evident how nervous she was in her expression. Her blue eyes darted around the room not focusing on one particular thing.

"Anyways. I did write an apology letter for a grade in the class, but I felt weird reading a letter or giving you one. Instead I just want to talk to you. Like a normal person."

Edd nodded. Marie looked straight into his eyes, standing up straight. "I'm really sorry Edd. For how I treated you in junior high. I was an attention seeker. As a middle child you kinda end up getting ignored sometimes and I took out my anger on you. That wasn't right of me. That's why I stopped doing it in 9th grade."

Edd was happily surprised. He never knew Marie to apologize or even be sincere. Yet here she was pouring her heart out to him. He wasn't sure what to do, so he was glad when Marie spoke up again.

"You don't have to forgive me, I just had to tell you. Thanks for listening I guess." Marie started to walk past him when he gripped her arm gently. She stopped in her tracks, meeting his eyes with confusion of her own.

"Thank you Marie. Truly. All is forgiven and I hope things go well for you after graduation." Edd spoke gently.

Marie snorted, making Edd let go of her arm in shock. He also hasn't seen her laugh in a long time. It was a good look on the bluenette.

"You always look for the best in people, dontcha Double D?" She said in a mirthful tone, her smooth voice raising an octave.

Her smile could light up an entire room. Edd found himself mesmerized by the dimple on her cheek.

"I don't have to wish you well after graduation. I know you're gonna do great things." She spoke these words before retreating out of the classroom. Edd was too in his head to notice he didn't say anything back to her.

He walked out of the classroom with the intent to track her down when he was stopped by a shorter figure.

"What the hell was that?" Eddy asked. Edd thought for a moment.

"I'm not sure.." All Edd knew was after sixth period he would be looking for a blue headed girl.

#not my best work but i tried #ed edd n eddy #eene #edd #double d #marie kanker x double d #double d x marie #edd x marie #edd x marie kanker #marie kanker #marie #mariedd #my writing #fictober #fan fiction #fic

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kennythecarrot12 · 5 years

Text

I’m Leaving

Taken from one of my stories in AO3, maybe someone on this site might enjoy this.

Ever since Jumin and I came back from our honeymoon, I thought everything would change.

I mean, those days left at the resort were heaven. I spent so much time with my husband, it felt like a dream.

….was it?

We got back, and he got triple the work he usually got. Many businesses, contracts, projects, and deadlines were coming up and it felt like I was being pushed aside.

“Jumin, dear, I thought we could go out and see-” I try to say. “Not tonight, MC, I've got to work until late today. The office has been chaotic as of late. I'll be back later.”

And with that, he was gone. It's been this way for months.

I don't think I can live like this.

Because you don't listen to what is so close to you,

Only the outside noise

And I that I'm by your side disappear from your eyes

But… I wasn't helping either.

During his day off, he asked me:

“MC,” I turn to him on the bed. He stared at my eyes. “I was thinking we could go out and look for a new dress for yourself. Seems that you're in need for one.” I narrowed my eyes.

“I already made plans.” He seemed confused. “Which I've already told you. Two days ago.” I turn back to my side of the bed. “I told you I was going out with Yoosung to the park with his cat. You even told me,” I clear my throat. “Alright. Have fun.” I try to imitate his voice.

He only stares at me. I feel his body leave the bed, and I sit up to see where he's going.

He goes to the bathroom and shuts the door. I jump at the sudden noise.

After getting up and dressing up, I see him with his suit on and suitcase in hand.

“I thought it was your day off?” I ask before he heads out the door.

“I have plans now too.” and with that, he leaves before I can answer.

I'm not going to cry and say I don't deserve this,

Because it's probably that I deserve this but-

That day, I decided to cancel my meeting with Yoosung.

“Are you feeling alright, MC? You've never canceled on me… or anyone actually.” he says over the phone.

I sigh. “yeah, sorry Yoosung. I'm just… not in the mood, ya know?” I say. I felt bad for canceling on him but… I couldn't bear myself faking a smile when i felt rotten inside.

“Alright, but call me if anything comes up! You know you can count on me for anything!” I smile and nod, as if he could see me. “you bet.” and with that I hung up.

Jumin has been even more distant from that day on. He left on more overnight trips than usual, almost like he was asking for it.

I usually called Yoosung or Seven when I was feeling down, as they knew how to cheer me up easily. But I stopped calling.

I wanted to leave.

Leave this worthless life, being a wife that is not even loved.

Being a member in the RFA that didn't deserve their friendship.

--But I don't want It,

And that's why I leave

I began thinking about this a lot.

It would be best to leave. Jumin would be better off.

Before I knew it, I was sending letters to each of the RFA members. I thought it would be better to also send little things that remind me of them.

I told Yoosung that I was sorry for this, that I never meant to say goodbye this way. I kept thinking of my last words to him… but I couldn't remember no matter how hard I tried. In his package, I gave him LOLOL plush toys, of his and my avatars.

To Seven… I now knew what it would be like to run away from family. And that I was sorry I was doing it to him again. I wished him happiness. I gave him a cat plush toy with the words “God Seven” sewn into it.

To Zen… I wished him success in his career and that I would be watching him succeed. I truly appreciate him. I gifted him multiple face masks of his favorite and a copy of our first selfie together.

I wrote to Jaehee how I regret not spending as much time with her, as she was always busy because of Jumin. ‘I always begged Jumin to give you days off.’ I gifted her a coffee machine with her favorite type of coffee in it. I also gave her a poster of Zen.

To V…. I actually recorded to him. I knew he was losing his eyesight and was refusing treatment. I gifted him a photograph I took of him with his camera when Jumin and I came over. It was a picture of him looking at the sky.

“Hey, V. I um… I decided to leave. Leave RFA and… to leave Jumin. It's just… not been okay for me. I felt unloved. Lonely. I even…” I chuckled. “I even wanted to escape forever without telling anyone… the only difference here is that I'm saying goodbye.” I inhaled. “You will all hate me for leaving so suddenly, but… I hope you understand, V. You know… knew… Jumin the best. You know how he is,” I smiled. “He is perfect in my eyes…” a tear escaped my eye but I quickly wiped it off my face.

“But even perfection has flaws. I wasn't happy by his side. Don't get me wrong, we were okay for a while but… I was too lonely and too neglected. I just hope you can forgive me.” I give a sad smile and turn off the camera.

I send the tape to V’s home to arrive the day the letters will arrive to the other members.

The last one is Jumin.

Because I know that something better waits for me,

That which sweetens salt, and makes the sun come out

Me, that thought I would never leave you,

that this love was good and for life,

but today I understood that there isn't enough for both of us.

I went to a lawyer and got the divorce papers. It was easy to move around since Jumin was never around.

The bad thing was paying people off to be quiet about my whereabouts.

Except to Driver Kim. He asked where I would like to go, no questions asked. I trusted him.

Eventually, I got home with the papers ready and signed from my part.

I wrote to him now.

“Dear Jumin,

It's been a hard year. You've been away so long, and I couldn't take it anymore. I'm sorry that I couldn't tell you this in your face, but I knew that once I told you this, you would convince me to stay. I can't do that anymore. On the bed, I left the divorce papers. They're all signed from my side. When you sign them, call my mother and she will pick them up. Please don't try to contact me or tell Seven to locate me… it won't be possible. I'm sorry I couldn't be stronger for you. I'm sorry I didn't have what it takes to be with you. I'm sorry I never gave you a family like you always wanted. I'm sure someone better awaits for you.

Someone that isn't me.

Please take good care of yourself.

P.S. Please take good care of Elizabeth the 3rd, she seems to miss you a lot.

Signed,

I'm not going to cry and say I don't deserve this,

Because it's probably that I deserve this

but I don't want it

so that's why I leave

What a shame but goodbye

I say goodbye to you and I leave

What a shame but goodbye

I say goodbye to you

I could feel my heart pounding out of my chest as I leave the note next to the divorce papers. This wasn't going to be easy. But I need to leave.

To get away.

I pick up my luggage. I leave almost all my clothing, the one Jumin had bought me. I take the one I came into this home with. Mostly consisting of sweaters, leggings, t-shirts, underwear and such.

I inhale deeply as I pet Elizabeth the 3rd. A couple of tears escape.

“I'm sorry… that I'm leaving. If there was a way I could keep you, I would. I know how lonely you'll be here. Same as me… but even worse. You won't have me as company anymore.” Elizabeth purrs and rubs her head on my leg. I exhale.

I leave food and water for her.

A temptation comes from going in my phone. I sigh and log in the RFA chat.

Yoosung, Seven and Zen were in.

MC has entered the chat room.

Yoosung☆: MC! Hi hi hi!

707: MC!!!

707 : SO GLAD YOU'RE HERE!! ☆☆

707 : TELL ZEN HERE THAT CATS ARE THE BEST PLZ

ZEN: *annoyed emoji*

ZEN: There's no point in trying to convince me, I'm allergic lol

MC: hey guys

MC: leave Zen alone lmao he's allergic

ZEN: Finally someone with common sense!!

Yoosung☆: Hey MC you ok?? You haven't been missing your meals have you??

ZEN: Yeah, you have barely logged in this week

707: do u want me to come over?!?!?

707: Jumin is working late today right??? I can keep you company AND see Elly!!!

707: B☆O☆N☆U☆S☆!!

MC: lol I'm ok just tired

MC: and yeah he is working late as usual

MC: but don't worry I'm ok lol

Jumin Han has entered the chat room.

Jumin Han: Hello, MC. Are you and Elizabeth the 3rd doing alright?

MC : yeah.

Jumin Han: I'm glad.

707: ooooooooohhhh!!! Is our heir busy tonight?!?!?!

ZEN: *yet another annoyed emoji*

ZEN: That dude is always busy, I have a feeling MC is always alone;;

Yoosung☆: Yeah… me too.

Jumin Han: Nonsense. She understands I'm busy.

MC: …..

MC: I got to go. It was nice talking to you guys

MC : I love you all

707: awww!!

707 : *hearts emoji*

707: We love you back!!!!

Yoosung☆: have a good day MC! Don't skip meals!

ZEN: call if you need a friend, MC;;

Jumin Han: She has other people she can call other than you, Zen.

MC has left the chatroom.

You didn't realize you had been crying. That was your last chat with them.

You wipe the tears away and leave the phone beside the letter and divorce papers before leaving the penthouse.

You get some looks from people inside the building, as you were carrying luggage.

Once inside Driver Kim’s car, you told him to drive you to the airport. He seemed worried for you.

You smiled at him. “I'm… okay.” He nods and continues driving. Once there, there was no going back.

“Next flight to… New York… leaving in 10 minutes.” that was your call to your new life.

That Night.

Jumin opened the door to his penthouse, noticing how quiet it was.

A sudden ‘meow’ startled him. It was only Elizabeth the 3rd rubbing against his leg.

By now, he would be hearing MC giggling at the TV show she usually watched. But… the house seemed quiet. Too quiet.

“MC?” He asked out loud. “I'm home.” he was met with more silence.

He checked every room until he got in the bedroom.

He saw a couple of papers on the bed and MC’s phone. He looked confused.

Once picking up the papers, his face went white.

“W...What…?” He said to himself.

‘Divorce Documentation’ read at the top.

This wasn't possible. It couldn't be.

He saw how every page was signed by MC.

He then noticed the paper next to those.

It was a letter from MC. He read it, and hasn't realized he was crying. It was not often he cried, but…

He physically felt his heart shatter.

He had driven his wife away from him.

Jumin then grabbed the phone she left behind, to tell him any clue as to where she had gone off to.

Jumin signed on her RFA account.

MC has joined the chat room.

Jaehee Kang: Hello, MC. How are you?

MC: ljkip

Jaehee Kang: MC?

MC has left the chat room.

Jumin couldn't believe this.

He called his chief of security, telling everyone to see or find out where she went.

He spent all night and all day the next day looking for her.

Jumin received a call from Driver Kim.

Jumin answered immediately. “Yes?? Do you know?” there was a pause. “airport?”

He hung up.

He went to his bed, no, -their- bed and cried. She was gone.

What a shame but goodbye

I say goodbye to you and I leave

What a shame but goodbye

I say goodbye….

And I leave.

☆☆☆EXTRA☆☆☆

His phone suddenly started ringing. It was V.

“Jumin… please go to the RFA chat room. Something has happened.” Jumin immediately logs in from his account.

Jumin Han has entered the chat room.

Yoosung☆: Did anyone get a weird package from MC??? I haven't opened it yet

707: …….

ZEN: yeah… I did too. Open it, Yoosung.

Jaehee Kang: So did I…

Jaehee Kang: Mr. Han…..

V: I don't know what to say. She sent me a tape.

Yoosung☆: a tape?? Why you?? I only got a letter T_T

Yoosung☆: oh nvm there's stuff here!!!

V: She was worried I wouldn't be able to read because of my eyesight.

Jumin Han: She gave me divorce papers.

ZEN: ?????!???????

ZEN: what???

Yoosung☆: omg …

707: she's leaving?????

Jumin Han: She already left… she hasn't been in the penthouse since yesterday, around the time she came in last time.

Jaehee Kang: Wait, Mr. Han. Are you sure? She came in last night and wrote random letters and left.

Jumin Han: That was me. I wanted to see with my own eyes that this was her phone and her app.

ZEN: Wait so she's gone?

ZEN: what the HELL did you do Jumin!!?

Jumin Han: …..

Jaehee Kang: Zen… please. Mr. Han must be having a hard time right now. He hasn't come into work all day today.

Yoosung☆: ….. We were supposed to go roller skating next week. How could she leave us like that?

V: She was having a hard time, Yoosung…

Jumin Han: it's all my fault. If I had been home more often to be there for her… I shouldn't have been mean to her.

ZEN: mean??? So you admit to treating her badly????

V: Not in the way you think, Hyun.

ZEN: Then?? What the hell is going on?;;

707: Jumin

Jumin Han: ?

707: I know where she went, but I'm gonna need time to locate her exact spot as she has no cellphone

Jumin Han: Where is she????

Jumin Han: TELL ME!

707: New York, USA

Yoosung☆: …..

ZEN: How did you find out so quickly??

707: She used Jumin’s account to pay for the ticket with card, but it shows she deposited the same amount of money later on on his account in cash

Jaehee Kang: I can only assume that she didn't want to owe Mr. Han any money…

V: Are you going after her, Jumin?

Yoosung☆: Obviously he is!!!!

ZEN: Yeah… He can't just leave her;;

707: idk

Jumin Han: No.

Yoosung☆: ???????

Jumin Han: She left for a reason. I can't change that. She's as stubborn as…

Jumin Han: point is… she doesn't want to be found.

Jumin Han: I'm signing the papers.

Jumin Han has left the chat room.

#mystic messenger #jumin han #jumin x mc #angst

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corroded-cofffin · 6 years

Text

Don’t Go, I Can’t Do This On My Own || Pairing: Steve Harrington x Reader

Warnings: None, maybe angst?

I’m a messss anyway this is from a prompt from this list. It’s “Please, come with me.” I’ve been slowly working my way down this list. Most of them have been Steve so far lmao

You were dying to leave Hawkins as soon as possible. You hated your family and you hardly had any friends. It didn't bother you because you knew as soon as you could you'd leave the damn place.

Steve Harrington was the one person who made this hell hole tolerable and even now he was in a sad jerk mood because Nancy broke his heart or some shit. He wouldn’t talk much about it.

You hated that you were gonna add on to that hurt. So you shoved your acceptance letter to NYU in your binder and ignored it for the rest of the day.

“Let's go to Benny’s after school. I'll pay and you can vent or mope. Whatever.” It had been two weeks since whatever the hell he had been doing at the Byers and he still wouldn't tell you what happened.

It had been a week since Nancy and Jonathan started holding hands in the halls and kissing when they thought no one was noticing. (Its high school someone is bound to see and spread that gossip like wildfire.) Billy had kept on teasing Steve relentlessly, though this was the least of Steve's worries, and you had to tell him you were leaving soon.

All in all things weren't great for Steve, he agreed to go to Benny’s with you though.

After school he drove you over there listening to a sad mixtape you assumed he made himself.

He put on a front for the kids and Nancy. Said it didn't bother him.

When you got to Benny’s you began talking to him like normal.

“So I saw Mike Wheeler with some new girl? She have anything to do with your adventure you refuse to tell me about?” you still tried to pry info out of him.

“You know I don't want to talk about that. I will eventually just not now. It's like everything is happening so fast I haven't had time to wrap my head around anything.” that was the most he spoke on the situation and you understood to an extent.

“I can't believe Nancy and Jonathan like...it hasn't been long enough and I feel like Nancy was with you long enough to tell when you're lying about your emotions. What is even up with her?” You just wanted him to let some of it out, he was going to explode if he kept it in, and the only way to get him to talk is to put some pressure on him.

“Leave Nancy alone it isn't her fault.” You ignored him.

“Isn't it though? She strung you along. All that time. For what? Nancy was my friend too. I'm allowed to be appalled at her actions, which were wrong, even if you aren't.”

He sort of nodded in agreement. He started patting his pockets. “Forgot my wallet.”

“I said it was on me.” You answered and he smiled.

“I'm not gonna make you pay for me. I know you're trying to save up.” He knew you hated Hawkins, but you always talked about maybe doing some community college classes before moving on.

He didn't know your home life got worse. He didn't know that you couldn't wait to leave.

He excused himself and went to his car. You were mindlessly playing with the sleeve of your jacket when he came back looking pissed.

Your brows furrowed together, “What's wrong?” he silently slammed your letter on the table.

Your face felt hot as you noticed other customers looking towards you guys. He was making a scene.

“What the hell?” he said simply, but loudly.

Your voice was low, “Steve, please, can we talk about this...somewhere else?”

“Why?! You don't care about these people! Or this town! Or…” he took a deep breath as if he didn't want to say what he was going to say next, you were standing at this point, eyes searching his face, your hands twitching and aching to reach out to him. He finally finished his statement before walking out, “Or me.”

You were in shock. He really said that to you. You couldn't move even as you felt all eyes on you. Tears were forming. You swallowed harshly and willed them away.

Finally someone spoke, “Um, don't worry about the bill it's okay.” It was Benny and suddenly your embarrassment came back full force.

“I-I am so sorry.” You stammered out. You snatched the letter off the table before storming out of the diner.

Surprisingly Steve was still there. In his car, his hands gripping the steering wheel so tight his knuckles were white.

You walked over and peered into the window. “Steve...I have so much to say and yet I can think of anything.”

“I was gonna leave but then I thought how will she get home. Who is gonna take care of her?” he looked like he was about to cry and it broke your heart. “who's gonna take care of her in New York?” He swallowed and you felt tears threatening to form in your eyes as well. “Who's gonna take care of me?” he finished and finally looked at you.

“Steve…” you exhaled and steadied your breathing. “I-I don't want to leave you. You're the best part about this garbage town. You're the best part of my life.” You wished you were in the car speaking to him. You wanted this to go so differently.

“Then why?”

“You always knew I was going to leave.” You responded simply.

“I know-” he slammed his hand on the steering wheel. “Fuck.” he said he was crying now and it fucking tore your heart up. He cleared his throat. “I just thought I had more time. I thought I'd have time to convince you to stay.”

You were sad, mad, and a mixture of confused. Steve had been hiding things from you and had been pretty tore up over Nancy lately. He had been distant, you never thought Steve felt this strongly towards you.

“I'm getting in the car.” You said and quickly got in. You guys didn't look at each other and sat in silence for a while, both of you regaining your composure. “I hate it here. I hate the kids at school. I hate my aunt and uncle. They hate me. I hate the weird shit that no one will explain. Like the stuff with the Byers kid or why Barb went missing and suddenly her death is discovered. Things seem off here and I don't like it. I want to be happy and I know I won't be here.”

“Even if it was with me?” he asked finally looking over at you. He looked hopeful.

“I'm usually always happy with you, but I can't stay here. Steve, you were just moping over Nancy.”

“You… you're misunderstanding. Yeah, it was a little upsetting when her Jonathon decided to be more...public with their relationship, but I've had time to get over that stuff with her. It's all the other stuff I'm having trouble with.”

“Which you don't want to talk about.” You sighed. “I'm not saying you have to.”

“So, do you want to hear something embarrassing?” he suddenly changed his tone. You looked at him skeptically but nodded. He let out a large breath. “I'm sure you remember the Halloween party and what I told you about the bullshit speech?” you nodded again. “I ran into Nancy while...things were crazy and I told her to go with him, Jonathan, and she told me that I deserved to be happy too and I needed to talk to you.” You lifted an eyebrow. “I didn't ask her what it meant for a while. I asked her about a week ago and she laughed and called me an idiot, which was….hard for me, but she told me she had never felt like she could commit to me because I always loved you.”

Your heart stopped. Just from the story you knew he had feelings for Nancy, it was obvious, but maybe you could believe he had feelings for you. At least at one point.

“You still care about her.” You said and he nodded.

“But if she left I would get over it. It would be fine. If you leave I'll be devastated.” So maybe he did have stronger feelings than you thought.

“There's a solution to this.” You said and you saw hope in his eyes.

You sighed because you know he would never agree. “What is it?”

“Come with me.” his face fell and you began crying you couldn't hold your tears back anymore, “

.” You were almost begging but you couldn't help yourself.

“I...you know I can't do that to the kids.” You wanted to be selfish. You wanted to remind them they had parents and each other and Nancy and Jonathan and Hopper, but you didn't.

You just nodded and tried to stop crying but you couldn't. “I want to.” he said sounding helpless.

“I can't stay here, Steve.” You said with finality.

You both faced forward. He started the car and began driving.

“I know you can't stay here and as much as I want you to I guess I won't ask again. I won't have you resenting me over something as dumb as Hawkins. I'm sorry I can't go with you.”

But you can, you wanted to say. “I am too.” You said instead.

“Stay with me? Until you leave?” he said quietly.

“Like...at your parents house?”

“They're never home and when they are I can say you're just staying the night or whatever.”

You were shocked and your first instinct was to decline, but you thought about staying with him or with your aunt and uncle. He was definitely better company and it was only a month.

It also could make things more difficult for you two.

“Okay. Yeah.” Your mouth said before your brain could talk you out of it.

“Really?” he said excitedly.

“Yeah. Fuck it.” You said with a smile.

So you stayed with Steve Harrington for a month. His parents came home twice and didn't even mention you.

But you and Steve were getting closer and closer all the time, which you had thought impossible considering how close you two were before all this.

One night, a week until you were scheduled to leave, you guys were eating dinner and watching a movie.

“I'm going to miss this.” he said it absentmindedly.

You smiled at him, “me too.”

When you were done eating you guys snuggled on the couch, a thing that had been happening a lot, a thing you immensely enjoyed.

“Can I tell you something?” he said into your hair.

“Of course.” You responded instantly.

“I...want to tell you about what happened with everything.”

You almost gasped, but stopped yourself. “Okay, tell me whatever you're comfortable with.” You replied.

He told you everything. What happened with Will and Barb and what happened recently.

You immediately thought he was lying, but he was serious, and emotional. Your gut told you he wasn't. You sat up and looked at him.

“You've been keeping this to yourself all this time? No wonder you were such a mess. That's a large load for one person.” You responded.

“But it was all of us. We all dealt with it.”

“But they all have each other and the kids rely on you. There was no one to take care of you.” You frowned and wished he would have told you sooner. Your hands ran through his hair, an attempt to soothe him.

He smiled a little smile. “I survived just fine.”

But he was still sad. You could tell.

“You're incredible.” You replied simply unable to word what you wanted to say.

But that made him smile wider and he wrapped his arms around you.

“You're the incredible one.” he whispered and kissed your cheek.

You guys spent the rest of the night cuddling and fell asleep watching a movie.

The night before you were scheduled to leave you began freaking out a little. It was exciting and scary. When you noticed Steve leaning in the door jam watching you pack you felt sad.

“Fuck, I don't know what to say as usual.” You said throwing some clothes into a suitcase.

He laughed at you. “No goodbyes right now. I'm just trying to memorize every detail about you.” You rolled your eyes and ignored the blush you knew you were getting.

“I'll visit. As much as I hate this town I love you.” You said and your eyes grew wide as you realized what you said.

There goes your mouth again, not letting your brain catch up.

“You...love me?” you scoffed and rolled your eyes.

“We always say that to each other Steve.”

“But this was…” you finally glanced away and continued packing. “was it different?” he asked and you sighed.

“I guess, yeah.” You said not wanting to have this conversation.

“I love you, you know it took me quite some time to get used to the idea of falling in love again, especially with someone who won't be in the same state as me.”

And there it was, the whole reason you didn’t want to do this.

“I don't think we should go down this road.” You said still packing.

He grabbed your hands and you reluctantly looked at him. “We aren't. You're going to be too far away. I'm not suggesting we try to make this work.”

“Then why do this?”

“I need this last night with you. I needed to know.”

“But this is going to hurt you.”

“I'll survive.” He smiled at you and finally kissed you.

Your world seemed to fade away. You completely melted into the kiss, it was slow and tender, full of love you didn't even know was there. Your hands wrapped in his hair and his held your face. You felt the kiss lasted a lifetime.

He pulled away and you kept your eyes shut and attempted to steady your breathing. Your eyes finally fluttered open and Steve was just staring at you like you were the greatest thing in the world.

His thumb was stroking your cheek. You suddenly wanted to stay. Knew that you wouldn't.

“This is a mistake, Steve.”

“I need this night with you.” he responded and that was enough for you.

You guys kissed and cuddled all night, talking through the night. You were going to be exhausted tomorrow but it was worth it.

When it was getting into the early hours of the morning he got a little more serious.

“I think if you stayed, and this is just a scenario, we'd have a little two bedroom house, and we'd do game nights or movie nights with the kids and Nancy and Jonathan. You'd become a novelist, and I'm going to school to become a nurse-” You shot him a look he hadn't told you he wanted to do that. He looked slightly embarrassed, “Yeah, it's something I've been thinking about for a while. I want to help people and not like Hopper does or anything I've done enough of that.”

You smiled at him, “Okay finish your story.” You desperately wanted to hear the end of his fairy tale.

He chuckled. “After we got steady on our feet with jobs and had a nice amount of savings we'd plan our wedding. It would be a small thing but I think you'd want something elegant, just seems so you.” You rolled your eyes. “Maybe we'd have kids but who knows.” he stopped there.

When he started you loved hearing it and towards the end...your heart sank. He had put a lot of thought into this. Into a life you could have had together.

“Do you want to hear the scenario if you come with me?” You asked and he nodded. “at first we get a small studio while I finish school. Unfortunately we're both going to be working shitty jobs to pay our bills, but after I graduate I'll get a better steadier job with pretty good pay. You could also go to school to be a nurse and start that. When we saved enough we find a nicer apartment or maybe a small house. I kind of want a house so we can have a small garden. We'd get married in spring. Maybe have a kid, not several. We'd come and visit everyone here and if we had enough money fly them out to visit us. I'd be happy.” You finished finally.

You guys basically just made yourselves sad. It felt good to say though.

“I'll visit you as much as I can.” You said quietly.

“It's alright worry about your future. I'll be here.” You didn't know how to respond to that you just cuddled closer to him.

You fell asleep, got a couple hours then you were up and he was driving you to the airport. Your heart was pounding. You wanted to cry. You also wanted to clap with joy.

It was a conflicting time.

He got out and walked with you a bit.

“So here we are.” You nodded, unsure of what to say. He sighed. “Don't worry about me. I'll call you and you can visit. If I ever get steady income I can visit. I will visit.”

“But...are we together? What's going on?” you didn't want to ask but you did.

“I...don't think we should do that. I think we should just wait until we figure things out a bit more.” You nodded.

“I think so too, but I need you to know I love you.”

He smiled at you. “of course I know that. I love you too.” You guys shared a small kiss before you left to get on the plane.

You wanted to go back and beg him to come with you. He'd miss everyone but you guys would be happy.

You glanced back at him and he smiled and waved.

You returned it.

You couldn't be that selfish. You couldn't ask him to change his whole life because you couldn't deal with a shitty family in a shitty town.

So you turned around and left.

#steve harrington #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #stranger things #stranger things imagine #my stuff #writing stuff

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deepdickdaniel · 7 years

Text

Yoon Jisung | Soulmate!AU | Handwriting

prompt: you have the same handwriting as your soulmate.

note: this was a request by an anon! my ask box is here and open! enjoy!

you remember being a kid practicing your letters in pre-k and hearing your teacher gasp in excitement

two other kids in your class had been assigned next to each other and when your teacher was walking around to check over their work, she noticed their handwriting being the same

every curve, every line was identical - it was like a printer copied them onto their papers

that was your first experience with someone finding their soulmate

and ever since then, you had been desperately searching for your own

you always snuck looks at your classmates’ papers to see if their penmanship matched your own, but to your disappointed, they didn’t

one year, your grade was chosen to send letters to students a few years older than you from a different school as a sort of pen pal mentorship exchange

you were assigned a student by the name of yoon byeongok so you sent a letter according to the rules of the program

he sent one back quickly, introducing himself and even drawing little smiley faces and cute shapes around his letter

you were relieved that your pen pal seemed to be kind and encouraging - his first letter already had a lot of awesome tips for applying to high school

after a few letters, you started to notice the similarities in his and your handwriting

but you didn’t want to embarrass yourself in front of someone you respected, so you kept your theory to yourself

that is, until byeongok himself asked you about it

one of his letters wrote “ah, and this might sound strange, but did you happen to notice that we have the same handwriting...? do you know what that’s supposed to mean?”

now you had hope that he was looking for his soulmate, too

so you wrote him back, explaining that you had actually put your letter and one of his on top of each other and held it to the light, comparing individual words

they were written identically

ever since you sent that letter, byeongok started acting a lot more casually with you, treating you more like a friend than someone he had to mentor

and you did the same, leading you two to eventually become best friends

the way you got along with him, you knew you were soulmates, even without physically meeting him

but byeongok still kept in mind your slight age gap, making sure to not approach you romantically just yet

so you continued to be just best friends

...until you moved from busan to seoul

you had failed to give him your new address in your last letter and the box you kept his letters in, and therefore his address, seemed to disappear with the move

all you knew was that he was planning on attending university in seoul and hoped that the universe would lead you to your soulmate once and for all

when you got to seoul, you settled in right away and made friends, but a part of you always felt like something was missing

you hadn’t talked to your soulmate in ages and while you had best friends, no one understood you like byeongok did

eventually, you graduated high school

and a new family moved into the house next to yours during the summer before university, where you were surprised to see someone familiar

it was park woojin, the cute little boy you always babysat back at busan

you guys hung out and you showed him around seoul during the weekends

he told you that he came into contact with daniel, another friend of yours from busan that moved to seoul a year or two back

woojin and daniel had met other guys in seoul and they became a whole group of friends

woojin would always tell you about the different guys, never shutting up about how cool and fun they were despite being a lot younger than half of them

when you met up with daniel again, he introduced you to sungwoon, who you found out would attend the same university as you

and daniel told you more about the guys woojin never shut up about

he especially went on about the mom figure of the group, but you weren’t really paying attention to the name

but you remember smiling at the mention of the guy, despite not knowing who he was

school started again and your first day of university arrived

you shared a class with sungwoon and met other friends as well

one day, after class, sungwoon asked if he could take your notebook home so he could copy some notes

he was asleep during class lmao

so of course you agreed and the next day, he came up to you looking suspicious while handing you your notebook

“...have you found your soulmate yet?”

you were surprised to hear this, feeling like it came out of nowhere

“i technically have...but i haven’t heard from him in a long time”

he nodded his head and remained quiet all class, which weirded you out but you decided to not say anything about it

after class, he told you to come eat dinner with him and a few friends

there, you saw daniel and a few unrecognizable boys at the table

you walked to the table in the middle of a guy wiping off daniel’s face and scolding him to eat more cleanly

“ya, you’re so old now, stop eating like a child”

you giggled to yourself as you got closer, mentally noting that this must be the mother figure that woojin and daniel were always talking about

sungwoon whistled, calling the guys’ attention and introduced you to them

the mother figure turned around and you swore your world stopped turning for as long as you guys locked eyes

everyone introduced themselves and when it came to the mother figure, you listened intently for his name

“hi! it’s really nice to meet the one woojin and daniel can’t stop talking about! i’m jisung!”

your heart absolutely dropped at hearing his name

despite your heartbreak at the thought of finding your soulmate and then discovering it wasn’t him, you made the most of dinner, quickly growing comfortable with the guys

seongwu’s jokes and seeing minhyun challenge the guys to shots despite his being filled with water LMAO made you feel kinda better

at the end of the night, most of the guys headed home, but jisung insisted on bringing you to your house

for some weird reason, sungwoon patted your back and winked before running to join the other guys

jisung offered to carry your things for you that you had brought from school, being really sweet despite you guys just meeting

you were a little tipsy and therefore, a little more talkative than usual, but jisung listened with an ever present smile, nodding his head and laughing at appropriate moments

you guys were halfway home when he asked if you guys could stop by a small park

he had you sit on a swing and sat in the one next to you, looking like he wanted to say something...so he did

“did you know we have the same handwriting?”

oh boy, you sobered up real quick

“w-what?”

“you’re my soulmate”

as much as you wanted to believe it, you knew your soulmate’s name wasn’t jisung

he noticed your hesitation and got a bit nervous, continuing,

“sungwoon hung out at my house last night and took out your notebook to copy notes...your handwriting is exactly like mine”

“..”

“i’m really happy that i found you after all this time”

not understanding his words, you decided to tell him the truth,

“listen, jisung, as much as i wished you were my soulmate, i know that you aren’t because i’ve already found mine...”

he looked confused and sad, lips unintentionally pouting

“what do you mean?”

you sighed, explaining about your lost love, byeongok, who lost contact with you when you moved to seoul

and when you were done with your story, you looked to jisung to see he was smiling and even tearing up

“i see”

“yeah, so i’m really sorry and i hope we aren’t awkward from here on out...”

“well, i’d hope not since you’re my soulmate”

“did you not hear anything i just---”

“i’m byeongok. i legally changed my name to jisung a little after we lost contact with each other”

you stopped talking and stared at him in shock - you hadn’t told jisung your soulmate’s name

he just smiled and stood up from the swings, walking over to you and holding his hands out for you to take, which you did

he pulled you up and hugged you, nuzzling his face into your shoulder

“i’m so happy that after all these years, we found our way to each other...”

he trailed off as you felt your shirt grow wet where his face was settled; he was sniffling but he wouldn’t let you go

you made him pull away so you could see his face and wipe away his tears while you were trying to hold in your own

“thank you for finding me, jisung. thank you for not giving up on me”

“as if i could ever give up on the love of my life”

he said this teasingly, leaning in to give you the first of many kisses that you would share with your soulmate

that night was the start of your relationship and your place as jisung’s soulmate guaranteed you a spot with the rest of the boys for life

and since jisung refusd to give up his title as mother of the group, you became their father (sorry minhyunnie)

sometimes, jisung would come to pick you up from the class you shared with sungwoon

“awww, hyung! you came to see me!”

“bye, i’m not here for you”

“WOW, what a neglectful mother!!!”

the guys absolutely adored you and were happy to see that jisung was no longer alone

and whenever you were with them, sitting with jisung’s arms around you, you were thankful for the family that came with you finding your soulmate

#yoon jisung #jisung scenarios #jisung imagines #wanna one #wanna one imagines #wanna one scenarios #jisung #soulmate!au #yoon jisung imagines #yoon jisung scenarios

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monolid-monologues · 5 years

Text

TMI meets TMO. (as in, sharing Too Much Info will Talk Me Out of heartbreak, maybe?)

#6.

And yet another week flies by..with nothing to publish. because i haven’t been writing over the week.

Actually, plenty of writing, but, very personal writing. Where it was not happening: my tinyletter drafts. Where it was: my yellow moleskin journal i lug around everywhere. And THESE DAYS I really mean everywhere every day because…………….. well………………… WELL. WELL, HERE:

Let’s start with some context.

My last Mainstage production at UC Davis before graduating was the great beautiful and miraculous The Bluest Eye. I kid you not, I felt in my BONES how much this production would affect me. I needed to be in it. I had conflicts with another show overlapping rehearsal/show times. I got cast (joy!!!!!), then dropped (NO!!!!!!!). I caused a lot of ruckus and trouble lol. I insisted I NEED TO BE A PART OF THIS. My gut was one thooooooousand percent right. I wish this kind of ensemble experience for every student theatre artist. In this show, I enjoyed the presence of the most colorful mothafking cast i’ve ever seen in a play. We understood the importance of our work and the importance of each other in this work. We threw ourselves into shared purpose. We created and held a treasured space for love and chaos. We brewed so much love it was like a drug in a league of its own; we gave and received so much energy together we were all bonafide high off each other’s presence.

This show was selected to participate in a festival and compete for national awards and recognitions. Like 1 of 30 across the country. Part of me cannot believe a theatre production from UC Davis Major University for the Sciences was invited to this robust/artsy-theatre-program-school-type-shit festival. But also, part of me knows how special what we put on was, is, will be. The life-sized puppets, the ensemble work, the story, the purpose — we shared something rare, relevant and powerful. White Theatre Be Shooketh.

As you can tell, i’m fiercly in love with this production. And the point of this context is that we are now reuniting to put this show back together and take it to Oregon for 1 week this FEBRUARY!

and i’m getting to my point now....

That spring, i told you, i knew being in this show was going to impact me beyond words. But what i could NOT have known. What i never expected. What has been haunting me for months: Falling in love with someone in this show. I couldn’t have known that someone I’d never known before this show was going to shake. me. to. my. core. In meeting this person, knowing this person, falling in love with this person, and letting go of this person, i have undergone and am still getting through a terribly overdue re-awakening of my independence.

It gets really messy okay. For me to go INTO it, i need to go into my my open relationship, my relationship with my then partner of nearing 5 years (who was set to move in with me in the end of spring, closing the gap on our LDR), and my trapezing around town with this person I just met. The short version is this: I was careless, reckless, and naive; ignorant of my partner, ignorant of my needs, and of my own spiritual well-being. At that time, with just that person by my side, i felt fucking invincible. But I was being real clumsy.

Fast forward to the end of that spring — my partner moves back in with me, i tell this person we need to just be friends now, and everything feels wrong. I’m lying in bed with my partner, crying my eyes out because i hate letting go of this person. My partner is finally back home with me and I’m crying my eyes out because the truth was i have never felt for anyone what i felt for this person, and that included my partner. This is, of course, when i realize my partner and i need to break up.

I’m dumb in love with the most awful timing — it is absolutely not the right time for me to “be with someone” — and the most obstinate hubris — “I can handle the drama”. The relationship between me and this person is becoming increasingly tumultuous. I feel distance; I feel coldness; I feel confused. I keep biting my tongue; I keep second-guessing myself; I keep killing my impulse. I keep telling myself this is what I want! I want HIM! But what the fuck do I know about what i need? I haven’t been single in 5 years. I can barely recognize myself. There’s so much self-discovery to do. I had no business trying so hard to be with someone, when i didn’t even give myself the chance to consider what it meant to be alone.

I was absolutely in need of time with myself. Time for myself. time alone. alone. alone. alone. alone.

I understood this when I spent the following summer in Vermont. off grid. in frequent solitude. and the fellowship of a beautiful few.

I nearly forgot it when i came back from Vermont, and started trying to be with That Person. Dare i admit i became desperate? I opened myself wide open to you, in such haste, that I nearly hallowed myself of all my hard-earned and beloved sacred energy to make any kind of space i could so that you would fit. so that i could maybe possibly somehow someway make it fit, make it work. Obvious spoiler: it didn’t work.

When i was trying to make it work, i was someone different. My best friend had never seen me in such a state: so in love with someone, and so unable to get a grip on myself. Sitting across from me, or soothing me on the other end of the phone, she is shocked to witness me so paralyzed, so fearful, so insecure. She wants the best for me and i don’t care, i just want him. As I run this back through my memory, I am shocked too. I’m a little embarrassed but mostly deeply empathetic towards myself then: i needed to be alone, but i couldn’t let go. Whatever i was trying to have…Whatever i was holding onto…was suffocating my life. And I insisted on being choked and being fine.

How did this become the cliff notes to my love life? I want to share with you the magnitude of this person’s affect on my heart, so that when i say: I HAVE TO SEE HIM AGAIN FOR THIS FESTIVAL

you understand

the

storm

resurging

in a place i thought was healing.

I was healing. I was letting go molecule by molecule. I was steaming off the memories layer by layer. I was cutting myself off from dangerous dwellings. I was doing my god. damn. best. to thoroughly leave this person in the past where this whole thing belongs.

Yet, The Bluest Eye is reviving for at least one more stretch in February. I’ve just come back from Davis (last night Sunday); we had our first full meeting and puppet rehearsal. This is to say, i saw the guy, in the flesh, and spent the whole week prior bracing myself for it. In the spirit of self-effacing honesty: i nearly didn’t go. But i decided it is a test of strength and it is a test of independence and it is allowing my craziness to overcome my insecurities. I was going to be in a room with this guy for 5 hours and dig my nails into myself, stay loyal to myself, and be Who I am unyieldingly. I felt really good about it when i left. I proved to myself that i could be the open and loving person i am even if the guy wrenching my heart is 5 feet away.

Being so distracted and confused by the pain and longing that i missed the opportunities to exchange energy with the rest of the room around me would have been my biggest regret.

As i said, i left feeling quite good, proud, and at peace with my vulnerabilities.

Maybe i’m not 100% recovered, but i’m clearly, very clearly, in the THICK of recoverING, and i am truly growing, and moving forward step by step by step.

In Davis, my good friend tells me: “if it’s not good for you, it’s not love”. Before I left for Davis, my best friend reminded me: “you’re trying too hard to fill in the blanks.” I’ve learned: “You can’t give what you can’t give.” (More familiar is the saying: you can’t give what you don’t have.)

To be completely honest, this beautiful show getting this beautiful chance at national recognition has ripped open such deep, old, ill-healing wounds in my heart. with a GIANT sigh, i am re-facing re-surfacing emotional ghosts, hurled back into combatting some very volatile mood-swinging emotional crises. In my personal journal this week i worked up a motherfkn STORM. My journal may as well be dripping from all the gel pen.

and meanwhile, my tinyletter’s been blank blank blank blank empty dusty blank………… and somehow, addressing my lack of tinyletter-ing, has revealed a very private part of my life. it is true: i was very busy private journaling, i didn’t have steam to write for the blog.

now i feel kind of sick this is the story for this week, i mean this is what came out, but this is all “VERY PERSONAL TERRITORY KEEP OUT”’. it’s honestly sort of unfortunate that this week’s letter has be to about my love life.

well there we go anyway.

Wow, Well, To leave on a more caustic, casual note~

THOUGHTS I KEEP COMING ACROSS AS I USE HINGE............

so many Del Playa/Newport, suit wearing, beer touting, IM ON A BOAT white bro motherfuckers (this is the first demographic i kept seeing on my recommended. happy to say hard passing each and every one of them has changed the algorithm).

why tf is pineapple on pizza such a hot topic lmao

BUT WHAT’S THEIR ENERGYYYYYYYYYY LIKE??????!!!!!!

But how old are these pictures man *scrutinizing any available time stamps*

Oh, :O HE’S………not the cute one in the pic………….

Pictures say 33 but profile age says 23, iooonnooooo sir

weird flex weird flex weird flex

if you think they’re 20 miles away from you, always add 20 more…………..

am i having an averse reaction to your profile because you remind me of someone? ~_~

am i really attracted to your profile because you remind me of someone? ~_~

ARE THESE SHENANIGANS THE BEST USE OF MY TIME???????????

It seems this is what comes out of me when I have nothing prepared to write about...

Nothing like rashly revealing too much info to motivate a better, more though-out next week. LOL.

wish me luck, and see you then.

* * *

i’ve committed to being vulnerable in writing every week. if u want it straight shot to your inbox: https://tinyletter.com/rose-artrat

previous letter: #5.) God Bless a Good Mess

for random thoughts, random questions //

http://monolid-monologues.tumblr.com/ask

#tinyletter #rose kim #too much info #heartbreak #why am i sharing this #why did i write this #look away

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