#i wil like all versions i have bad taste and im just okay with that

[thisartemisnevermisses]

Going Under 4/-

Paring: Mostly Steve Rogers x Reader; little Clint Barton x Reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, out of character acting, probable smutt in later chapters, sad reader, broken, sweet ending.

Summary: You work as head oversight for the Avengers. After a party and a little kiss, you start crushing on Steve. Only an event from you’re rookie years, is sabotaging the possibility of your crush to evovle into something more.

A/N I mean wow you guys. All the likes and even followers, I feel honoured. So, this is chapter hold another piece of the puzzle. It also introduces your team (beta team), it's necessary for the next chapters, so you know who were talking about. I mean wow you guys. All the likes and even followers, I feel onnoured.

Chapter 4: broken

“How could it get so out of hand?” Bucky continues.  “Well, to get to that point, I need to tell you what happend two years ago. It has to do, with my crush…on…Steve” you continue your story, blushing feveresly. Steve raises his head, what was his role in your story. Oh god, what did he do? Wait what, she has a crush on him too?

“After that day, I left the compound and joined team beta…” you continued.        

After your encounter with Clint, you made sure the most important belongings were packet. Without saying goodbye to your colleagues you walked to the hanger. The quinjet that would bring you to the airbus of team beta, stood waiting. Glancing back at the hangar and the attached compound, you remember all the good times you had here. It was where everything started. Where you grew as an analyst, had your first mission as an agent. It was also the place you were humiliated and broken. Your faith in love was damaged, maybe even darkened. You had your flings, but you had never ventured into a relationship. At least if you could call this a relationship. Twenty-four hours on each other's lips, maybe it was normal to get feelings for one another? Did you overreact?

Taking your seat in the quinjet, you rethink the events that happened recently. His kiss, the way he touched you, the burning sensation that you still feel on your body. The way your heart shattered when you saw him with his wife. You feel tears forming in your eyes. Thinking about that morning after you had seks. You stayed in bed, talking about what you want most. How Clints perfect day would look like and how he would spend it with the one he loves. At that time, you thought he was talking about you. You were so wrong. The way his eyes looked at you, how he held you and made love too you for the second time, taking his time, savoring every little bit of you. How could he do that to you, to her, to their unborn child. You felt nauseous of the idea you were a homewrecker. It didn't help that Clint had treated you wrong in the office. "Sleeping my way up, huh as if" you mumble to yourself. Thinking of it, who was agent ca..and what had he or she told Clint about you, telling him lies. Your thoughts were interupted.

“Is this seat taken?” a young woman with braided dark red hair asks. She is about your age and casually clothed. You look at her with sad eyes,  barely registering her question, she excuses herself. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disturbe you. Are you alright?” She said looking concerned. Wiping at the corner of your eyes, swallowing before speaking “yeah, no..no I’m fine” you say scraping your throath. “What was your question” you ask looking at the young woman.

“I wondered if this seat was taken. It will take a while before we get tot he hangar where the airbus is located” she says smiling. “Sure sit down, just me, myself and I” you smile. “Oh good, you have a split personalty too.” The woman laughs and for the first time, since feeling so miserable you laugh. If she is part of the team you’re going to work with, it could be fun.

“Im Lexi Star, beta’s engineer” she says while holding out her hand. “Hi, I’m y/n, soon to be analyst of beta team.” You answer shaking her hand. “Welcome, to our team. It’s going to be fun. I think you’ll fit wright in. Seems we have the same kind of humor.”Lexi smiles, her whole face lights up. You’re going to like her, you already know that.

During your flight, you two chat about all kinds of stuff. How you were trained at the academy, complaining about your professors, to your first assignment as an missionanalyser. When Lexi asks you if you have any field expierence, you quickly answer with a yes and change the subject.

Arriving at the hanger, you see agent Coulson talking to a tall man in a suit. Could it be that, this was agent Robbins? You’ve read about him in the files you got. Walking towards the two men, you adjust your cloths and check your hair in a window. “Ah, agent y/l/n, you’re here.” agent Coulson says smiling. “I was just telling agent Robbins, how lucky he is with you on board. I’m very pleased about your work. You got a goodone Robbins. And if you let her, she could be more then just an analyst” agent Coulson says while patting agent Robbins shoulder. “Well then, I will do my very best to let her use her full potential.” Agent Robbins smiles at you. “Come agent y/l/n, I will introduce you to the rest of the team”.

You two walk towards a group off four people, two woman, ofwhich one is Lexi and standing next to her is a tall woman, with long black hair. The two men are discussing something on a tablet. One of them is tall and has broad shoulders. His haircolor stand out, he has strawberry blond hair. The other has a very short hairdo and is two to three inches smaller then the other guy. “Y/N, this is Agent Callie Strong, bio-chemist of this team” agent Robbins says, while you shake the tall black haired woman hand. “You've already met Agent Lexipedia.” agent Robbins laughs, Lexi turns her eyes, “That joke is getting old, Finn.” Lexi adds. “These are Agent Owen Lake and Avery Rhinebeck, our fieldagents.” Agent Robbins points toward the strawberry blond man and his teammate. “Well team, this is our new analyst, agent y/l/n.” agent Robbins introduces you. “Lets get this thing in the air and I will brief you about the upcomming mission. Agent y/l/n, Agent Star wil show you, to your room.” Robbins says before heading towards the coackpit.

-------------------------------------------

You stand infront of the mirror. Tonight would be the night. After almost 8 years you head back to where everyting started. Sinds that day, you never went back, making sure every contact you had went via e-mail or video calls.

Looking at your reflection, you ask yourself if you look okay and your thoughts even go to Clint for a second. You shake your head and skold yourself for even thinking the slightest about him. You pull at your dress, which is a black sleeveles a-line dress. It goes to your knees and has a lace embroaded bodice. You’re skirt is made of tule and you wor black high heels on. You felt elegant and pretty in it, it made your girly side scream. Your smockey eye make-up and romantic hairdo made you look gorgious. Turning again you look how your skirt twirls and the sound the tule makes you relax. You would have fun tonight and noone would stop you. There’s a knock on your door and Lexi comes in. “Wauw, you look stunnig” she compliments. “Thanks Lexi” you answer shy.

“Well, ready to party” Lexi asks while dancing. “Lets get wasted” Avery yells while crashing into your room. “Get out Avery, only ladies alowed” Callie says walking in and shoves Avery out of the room. “Well, that leaves you out” Avery mockinly says, “Love you too honey.” Callie answers smiling, while flipping him off.

“So before we go to the party. Are there things we need to know.” Callie asks smiling mischievous.

“Like uhmm has Bucky have bad breath or how much alcohol can Sam hold? Whats Thor’s soft spots.” Lexi gigles, her face is getting redder by the minute.

You smile, “Sorry guys, I can’t give you an answer. I don’t know them. The Avengers didn’t excist during my time in the compound. I can only tell you to watch out for Clint Barton. He’s an asshole.” You say staring into space.

“Oh…do tell.” Callie smiles a devilish smile. “Are you speaking out of experience.” She asks wiggling her brows. “You got yourself a piece of the Bartonpie.”

“Yeah and it tasted bittersweet.” You answer softly.

Lexi looks at you, seeing the shift in your appearance. You look at yourself in the mirror, blinking a few times. After all these years, you still felt the pain in your chest. The pain Barton caused by crossing you.

“You..you don't have to talk about it.” Lexi says seeing how you try to controle yourself. “Its okay” you breath. “Lets talk about it on our way over to the party. Maybe telling you about it, will help me finale close it. Hell, maybe it will even help me face him tonight if I would encounter him.” You say taking your purse and leave your room.

“I don’t understand what Steve has to do with this sofar.” Bucky interrups you.

“I will get there, you see, I encountered Clint at that party and fled to the balcony. But we're getting ahead of things. I know the story is long, but you gave me the chance to tell my version. I don’t want to let anything out.” You say looking at Bucky. He could see te determination in your eyes.

#Steve Rogers #steve x reader #steve rogers x reader #clint barton x reader #clint x reader #marvel #marvel fanfiction #fluff #shield