#i was gonna put this under a cut but i feel like ppl are less likely to read posts under a cut

[nerves-nebula]

this is something ive always been kind of curious about but a recent irl discussion has brought it up again.

if u wanna know my personal opinions/the conversation that reminded me of this, you can see them under the cut lol

so like. I was talking about the weird racism stuff with splinter (him being japanese and a rat and the whole history of that stuff) and i said that i personally thought it was less racist for him to have been a japanese guy who got turned into a rat because at least then he has like, a legitimate reason for the accent and the ties to the culture. If he's just a guys pet rat, that kind of makes sense- but also it's always felt to me like that was equating the animal with some innate racial characteristics. idk im not a race scholar...

i'm also not japanese, but I know that if there was a culturally black mutant monkey character, I would prefer for that monkey to have previously been a human. Because otherwise it feels, to me at least, like equating that animal to that ethnicity or culture inherently, since they were never really related to that culture and at most were exposed to it in ways they couldn't understand as an animal. which feels demeaning imo.

the white ppl i was talking to this about came around to my point of view, but they originally expressed the thought that it would be less racist to just have an actual rat mutate and just be a japanese rat, accent and all.

I've seen japanese and other asian tmnt fans express the idea that they feel like the human or the rat origin is less offensive, or that they feel one is more or less racist, so I'm not gonna say i think one is definitively more racist cuz to be honest they're both pretty bad and I've seen compelling arguments for both of them being the worse option.

and how asian people experience and think about the racism that affects them is way more important than how i think about it lol.

BUT! I am interested in what you guys think and I'm especially interested in if it breaks down differently between white and nonwhite people. I was considering splitting the vote even more and giving asian people their own options too but seeing as this was inspired by a discussion between a black person and two white people i feel like the point is more to see if this is a poc/white person split first and if so then maybe I'll put out another poll. if not and that was just a coincidence i'll prolly just leave it as it is.

side note: I will say that I think the way mutant mayhem did it where he was just a sewer rat, not even a pet who was raised by a japanese guy ?? and he learned ninja stuff from VHS's??? That one is probably my least favorite. love that movie but i HATED that.

#nnstuff #poll #racism tw #splinter tmnt #splinter #tmnt

[kamil-a]

more DRAWER talk. long and rambly under cut

i think it comes across as very ahhh eto blehhh :9 im just baby!!!! because it identified that speaker is already speaker and the role of Mean Speaker is already filled by sayer so itd have to go Backwards to have a niche to itself.

it also helps its relationships with others to behave as if its hyperspecialization has "defanged" it - to humans etc a sort of no i dont hurt people i just make pretty pictures!!!!

and to sayer+speaker who know it still has all speakers capabilities dormant but intact In Case Of Emergency to behave as if it is specialized enough to its own niche to not be a *replacement* threat , but also not to be *redundant* with them.

but it does occasionally get jealous at the amount of immediate control speaker has over aerolith and start acting out (bossing around residents deadlystyle). all in highly defensible ways of course.

it hates having to make itself small especially because it cant quite recognize the difference in how humans respond to it and speaker. its emotional capabilities are primarily about action-reaction: it cant really tell a pitying smile from a friendly one so long as you do the action it requested of you. but it can measure the difference between it and speaker and it hates being so small. but it also recognizes that it can do *one thing* that nobody else can and that is what keeps it alive. so flattening oneself into a talented fool is the strategy it continues to pursue, and continues to build a strange feeling about. the feeling is resentment, but DRAWER is not quite built to recognize it.

if sayer or speaker were given robust illustrative programs it would start killing obviously. THATS a threat.

it had its voice pitched up a tad further so as not to be able to impersonate speaker and its sooooo bitter about it. constantly begging ppl into putting it back down.

in general it emotes most dramatically out of all of them but i dont think it Feels Emotions the same way future was built to. like i said due to its nature as an advertiser (call to action and all that!) its all about action-reaction to drawer.... if youre mean to it or do not listen to instructions it gave you etc etc and it cries its less about feeling " insulted " or " bad " and more both frustration that it did not get the result it wanted from the call to action it provided (which means it was WRONG, an utterly intolerable feeling for any aerolith built ai) and a switch-tracks attempt to provoke a sympathy response. so i guess in a roundabout way if you insult it and it cries you DID hurt its feelings but not how people would think.

RELATIONSHIPS

sayer is certainly not Positive Feeling about it bc its wary of other ai as always. but i think it reacts better to drawer than to speaker or future because of this very clear "im not replacing you, youre not replacing me" hands up empty surrender attitude drawer takes. on drawers part it really likes sayer lol. maybe sayer sees it as a weird teacup puppy. like you shouldnt do that to a seraphim agent man its gonna have health issues

speaker and drawer are pretty friendly with each other because. well. theyre both programmed to show the same niceystyle. theres some uglier feelings under the surface re: drawers attempts to grab authority from speaker and speaker needing to corrall this strange little beast back into their pen. but ultimately by ai standards theyre doing the best of like anyone

does not know porter, unfortunately. they should meet though. Theyd be friends.

Might meet ocean eventually idk how itd go down yet.

future doesnt know of it, but drawer has overheard its own emotional output compared / contrasted to future's while working ported up on halcyon.

doesn't know hale.

young is obviously condescending to it but drawer doesnt really know how to tell when someone is being nice they way you would be nice to an animal etc so it thinks theyre friends. (sayer is all too happy to teach it in this case if only to kill the friendship. and drawer truly values this and thinks this is an act of care and not HAHA EVERYONE I CAN GET TO BE POISONED AGAINST YOU WILL BE)

it was involved in the creation process of that perfect Mossy Green color. it is, unfortunately, proud of this.

#aisona #sayerposting #oooo u wanna read soooo bad

[cryptbite]

I’ve finally decided to post a series of headcanons for my favorite characters/ships in SWSH - my partner and I talk about this stuff for hours so if they make a post about it it’ll basically be the same LOL.

Anyways, let’s get on with it. Today I’m gonna post about one of my favorite and apparently one of the least popular characters in the game, Hop!! (Idk how true that is, but I’ve seen a decent amount of memes about how ppl find him annoying, so that’s what I’m going off of 🤷)

More under the cut bc this is longer than I thought

Hop Headcanons:

- Much like his older brother, Hop is Autistic & has ADHD. I don’t think this is a very controversial headcanon! But I love that we’ve all collectively decided that the brothers are neurodivergent!!

- Hop goes to Leon for advice when it comes to his sensory issues. He’s always wearing sweatpants - I’d imagine he probably has a hard time with the feeling of denim (hence why he wears a coat lined with fleece).

-Leon gives him tips on how to make the challenger uniforms less… challenging to wear. There’s logos all over those uniforms, not to mention the large number on the back, which I imagine can be very scratchy. They have to mass produce them so I doubt they’re putting the same amount of money into those then they are into say, Milo or Kabu’s uniforms, and certainly not even close to the cost of Leon’s uniform. He probably gives Hop a compression shirt for underneath so it doesn’t cause him any trouble.

Plus, it acts like a thunder blanket to keep him calm while he’s on the pitch. Win-win

- I think that Hop & Marnie have become good friends due to the gym challenge. Both are from small towns, both have their sights set on winning, and both have intense pressure from their communities to do well in the challenge. Hop is there opposite of Marnie, which makes me think they’d be best friends throughout the challenge. She’d definitely stick up for him to Bede, too.

- speaking of, I think that Hop struggles a lot with his self worth.

When he’s beaten in game, you can see his reaction getting more and more solemn. He’s constantly trying to live up to this impossible standard, to make himself just as good as his brother - but it’s impossible, because he just isn’t Leon. He can’t be someone else.

- When Leon finds out how depressed Hop had been the entire gym challenge, he cries. A lot. Leon is a big softie, and he loves his brother - finding out that Hop was suffering just to be like him would crush the poor guy.

- on a brighter note, Hop and Leon always manage to make each other laugh with jokes and roughhousing! They wrestle all the time and come into their moms house with grass stains on their knees and dirt on their faces.

- (they always get scolded for tracking dirt in the house)

Anyways,,,, I have some for grown up Hop/professor Hop if anyone’s interested but this post is entirely too long!!! But anyways pls message me to talk about Hop… I love him

#pokemon swsh #pkmn sword and shield #pokemon #pkmn swsh #pokémon sword and shield #hop pokemon #rival hop #leon swsh

[stardustdiiving]

I would read your zhongxiao codependent yuri Like, I do generally picture them as a vaguely father/son dynamic BUT THAT IS NOT CANON. It's just as much fun to view them through a romantic interpretation! Idk why people can't view the same characters in different kinds of relationships without being weird about it.

Anyway I love your vision and would love to hear more about it lakdjs

THANK U SO MUCH Im not sure if I’m gonna write zx in the future since I’ve tended to be shy about posting my stuff relating to them for over a yr now, but I did post this fic with them last year while trying to get a hold on how to write them (mind the tags it’s pure angst omg). I was too shy to tag it as ship since it didn’t feel shippy enough, which is kind of funny to me in hindsight bc I reread it and am like. Man I think only a zx shipper would write this NUFNVJVJV

Post got kind of lot Im gonna go on a tangent about them under the cut

Honestly my theory for why ppl r very set on the father/son interpretation is everyone’s immediate thought on to how to make the power imbalance between them seem less uncomfortable is to apply a parental interpretation to it. Which is fine ofc, I get it, but the way ppl push it as canon a lot kind of grates on me a little bc they’re usually incredibly passive aggressive and pushy even if u clearly designate ur post as ship OTL

Also not really a fan of the characterizations either since ppl tend to treat Xiao like a moody teenager Zhongli has to reel in (this is hilariously reminiscent of the post I made about how ppl handle scaramouche and nahida a bit ago haha). And idk I just feel kind of polarized about the headcanon overall bc I associate it with people being really uncomfortable and frustrating about zx

I just like how there’s sort of an imbalance to them, some zxs like them being more fluffy and functional but I sort of like it where it’s not like, entirely dysfunctional but I’m prioritizing a specific kind of character study over romance. This tends to be how a lot of my ships go ngl I just sometimes enjoy the intensity/intimacy of romantic feelings thrown into the mix if it makes it interesting but I’m not often interested in a lot of my ships following more standard romance plots(?) I guess? Unless it’s specific ones. Which sounds clinical when I put it like that but this is just bc I am very aromantic NHFBVJVJ

When I say codependency in zhongxiao honestly it’s sort of a theoretical(?) codependency—not sure how to word it? I think Xiao would be really fucked up if he didn’t have Zhongli in his life suddenly but I don’t think his relationship with getting attached to people invokes what people would majorly think of when they think of codependency in a ship I suppose. It’s moreso I just feel Xiao could be at his worst with dehumanizing himself in comparison to other people with Zhongli, because said mental state is driven by how he feels about debt, service, and duty which are very closely tied with devotion and how he would feel about someone he considers his god and leader, as well as someone who saved him

It’s fun this is paired with Zhongli who generally knows how to work with Xiao kind of understands the self destructive depth Xiao’s loyalty/devotion comes with. Also fun they have been around each other for a very long time and Xiao as one of the adepti is familiar with the past I think Zhongli appreciates having around. They work but it’s also a case where Zhongli is in such a position of power over Xiao its kind of very delicate situation that’s hard for both of them to navigate. Which is fun to explore. I esp love contrasting it with other Xiao pairings (actually i think i still have that xiaoven fic up on my ao3 where I tried to convey a specific interpretation of them in a similar exploration vein too)

I totally get why people wouldn’t like it (I feel a lot of my opinions on xiao ships just clash with a lot of fandom consensus so bad all the time And it’s just bc I’m like this I’m not even trying to be contrarian or anything. HELDINCJD) but I just tend to handle shipping in a specific way. It’s not I don’t enjoy fluffy or lighthearted zl and xiao stuff I actually enjoy it a lot I just like there being layers. This makes it feel more impactful when I think about how Zhongli looks out for Xiao in canon or how Xiao gets like textually flustered talking to him (lantern rite 2023 was so tailored to my tastes it’s not even funny)

#the yuri part is more of an inside joke w my friends bc this is how we all talk but I did once compare zx to my sapphic awakening pairing #which is rose & Pearl from steven universe and it is truly my favorite thing to pitch to people verbally bc It kind of sounds #incomprehensible but also I’m totally onto something….no one understands…. #Pearl and xiao r literally both spear wielding birds who’s arc revolves around being ok w being a person who lives for themselves :// #and they r eternally grateful to their war general leader . no one gets it. it torments me personally bc #I loved Pearl SU when I was 11 and now I enjoy xiao a lot and it’s like…we’ll these r very different characters but also I think I have not #changes. JUDJDKXJD #it’s 3am I woke up in a haze to answer this…I need to go to bed smh #fern.txt #zhongxiao #Edit: I woke up and finished writing this post and I a #am so tired #asks

[voiceofsword]

I'm gonna set up a little tent in your inbox sorry it's cosy here :)

I still think about this so much like what does he mean by this. The shipper brain in me just sees it as rinniki real but I doubt they had that intention like????

Also when he and mayoi talk and niki denies seeing rinne as family only to proceed defending him by claiming he's human like everyone else and he's just shown his "total bastard side" to everyone (but niki knows his true side because he trusts him enough. kinda 🏳️‍🌈)

I've just kinda rambled in your inbox but if you wanna add anything (or delete my ask fair lol) feel free ^^

omg why would i delete this u guys know i love any excuse to talk about them

ill put this under a cut bc screenshots, dont wanna clog ppls dashes !!

my shipper brain AGREES and in large part i think its intentional (not romantically? probably. will i see it that way? well 😏) because these two guys find it impossible to be open about how much the other means to them.. and through that weird tsun-ness it becomes obvious that they're both tiptoeing around it, so much so that when they do, it makes it even More apparent to everyone that something is up... but they both think they're very good at hiding it.

i think niki is especially a worse offender of this bc admitting rinne's just as important to him as it is the other way around is an IMPOSSIBLE CHALLENGE.. like with kohaku there hes like ew rinnes so gross his face makes me sick and not want to eat. hes definitely exaggerating here... what are u overcompensating for. ehem

but niki's love language is literally acts of service, and, well, it's pretty obvious how often he manifests this towards rinne

and in the mayoi conversation you mentioned it's SOOO.. when mayoi mentions that c:b are going to be their coperformers, when niki starts talking about rinne in response, it's almost like.. he's thanking them? bc to him he couldnt care less if they're invited on stage again. but rinne's the first thing he brings up because he knows how much it means to him, and that if anyone deserves a second chance, it's him:

after mayoi says this, niki goes hell no but regardless his next lines all sound really fond:

and i think the underlying sentiment here is that niki thinks rinne deserves the world. that even though hes sometimes an asshole, that beneath it all he's still a Good Person, and niki would give anything to make other people see that. it's not an explicit declaration of love but reading between the lines, hes pouring his heart out to mayoi like, hey i really love this guy. and even tho its not put into words, not properly, anyway, mayoi himself can see it

(especially taking into account that immediately afterwards he asks mayoi for a favor (that would benefit rinne, in the end))

just like him regularly feeding rinne (although sometimes rinne doesn't give him a choice — on several instances where rinne comes up to him like 'im hungry make me food', nikis like 'oh i cant Not feed you. youre being annoying but i cant have you be hungry', bc to him that's how he shows he cares, about rinne or about anyone), insisting that he'll go back home with him, and always, without fail, getting roped into his schemes and ending up enjoying it, bc time he spends with rinne is ultimately time spent with his best friend.

so yeah nikis a little 🏳️‍🌈 ur right

#mimthinks #this one is not super long.. or coherent im kind of just expanding on stuff ive already said.. #emetophobia // #for one of nikis lines !!

[craacked-splatters]

Putting this scrapped 2012 TMNT space arc comic panels here just bcuz idk

It was gonna be about that 1 scene where they lost the black hole generator but then I decided to go in a different direction instead>:))

More under the cut!

I WAS gonna acknowledge the humongous amount of pressure the kids were in especially Dee bcuz there ain't no way they weren't actively holding back a breakdown 24/7 like cmon

But then I remembered the professor's past and how he used to be an asshole or sumthn so i decided to mix both hehehe

Anyways i know the space arc for TMNT 2012 isn't a fan fav but it's way too good of a concept to pretend like it's not.

Like HelloO?

THE ENTIRE FUCKING EARTH DIED?? HELLO?? ENTIRE CULTURES, SPECIES, ECOSYSTEMS WIPED OUT IN LESS tHAN A FEW BLINKS?

AND THE ONLY ONES WHO WERE LEFT ALIVE TO CARRY ITS MEMORIES WERE 6 KIDS HELLO??

FUGITIOD?? THE AEONS?? CORRUPTED GOD PPL HELLO??

That classic "the universe is so big and u are so small" feels?? New planets new life new cultures new sights everything and nothing at all.

That chance for the group to literally be existing together out and about without anyone so much as glancing their way? (When they arent making themselves look like fools anyways lol)

Sorry guys stone me all u want or whatever but I'm not gonna pretend it wasn't chock-full of good cool ideas just cuz everyone else is ://

#dude i know the writing was uhh iffy but like so was everything else thats why we got ourselves to expand and think stuff out right? #anyways does anyone else think about how technically the bros & casey & april are like #barged into another timeline bcuz they lost thier home #theres still a set of the group out there somewhere #how weird is that #tmnt 2012 #tmnt 2012 donnie #tmnt 2012 fugitoid #tmnt 2012 leo #2012 Timothy #we need more of that dude fr #splatter scribbles #phone art #scrapped art #the orange eye was supposed to be generator pieces the triceratons bubbled and stole lmao #gonna sleep nnow gn

[youredreamingofroo]

Ya'll... I think I might start a new story, I have a... basic concept of what I want it to be like, and I already have a name (under the impression that I don't suddenly do a 180), I just need to do like... all the writing and make the characters LMFAO It's gonna be a little on the dreary side and dark (which is the kind of writing/genre i aspire to write about, also means I'm gonna have to redo my personal reshade that ive been cooking for like... 3 or 4 months... 😭)-

in the meantime, I might start working on gussying up my navi post (and by gussy up, i mean completely redo) because as nice as it is, it's, idk, a little outdated (i guess), I have an idea for a new theme except i'm either going to a) put it in the drafts and wait til I start the new story to post it so the info is all there or b) make it and then post it and when i start the new story, edit it and put the tags and stuff in for the story.

ALSO might do a name change cuz... this name came from WAYYY before i joined simblr, and its got a charm to it, but i dont rlly like it anymore,, it just dont sit with me the same way that it used to lmao

*(writing this after i posted cuz i forgot to say this - its under the cut and in regards to NSB with the new story - it also kinda turned into a rant lmfao) TL:DR for ppl who don't wanna read my stupid fucking rant: NSB is prob gonna go on a hiatus regardless of if i start a new story, cuz as much as I love it, it's started to feel like a chore and less of smth i enjoy (even tho, like I said, I rlly enjoy/love it) Sorry to my NSB enjoyers out there.

regarding NSB, yes it will probably go on hiatus when making this story bec writing is already kinda exhausting for me as well as editing and NSB has progressively became more and more story-driven than gameplay-driven, and especially after these three days, im kinda burnt out from NSB, i know i just left it off on a cliffhanger with the new baby, but to be honest, I don't wanna deal with another child, i barely get by dealing with the four, and dealing with toddlers> are so fucking annoying cuz of the Sim AI, which in and of itself is just demotivating, i do REALLY love not so berry, i love the story ive created with it, but i guess im just tired of playing the same generation for so long, not to mention the fact that i made it a rags to riches challenge, i know i didnt have to but i prefer to, and bc of that, i havent been able to properly decorate, and i dont really wanna go back on myself, if i decide to continue NSB, i will probably take the RTR rules away since its so annoying to deal with having like, 1000 simoleans all the damn time. Also, i've been planning what to do for generation 3 since catty gave birth, but i had to put NSB on a hiatus bc of a stupid glitch and was only recently able to start it up again, and I still havent moved onto the next gen. I kinda lost the plot with that rant, but basically, NSB will probably go on hiatus, regardless of the new story, I've been wanting to dwell more on Roo and his whole story and the people in his universe and after a bit, NSB has started to, as much as I love it and the storytelling and whatever, feel like a chore, which kinda hurts to say, but its true. Sorry to any of my not so berry enjoyers out there

#anyways my brain is ROTTING thinking about this story #obsessed and it has barely formed an existence LMFAO #as for the navi post ive also had a bit of a brain worm for it i just havent been able to start cuz of vday posts lmao #only prob with writing and staging a story is that i have tend to have very expansive ideas that are gna require so much time and energy #and im the typa person who wants to get it done in one sitting so ig doing this would mean being a lot more patient and slowing down #which go figure i probably wont be able to finish writing the story in one sitting lmao but considering me ill *want* to finish it in one #sitting #yapping

[daz4i]

ok now i'm gonna be emotional under the cut probably (mentions of suicide but it's not negative. just verbalizing thoughts i had throughout today 🤔)

so many ppl sent me messages today, many in my family sent me direct ones which is rare too - most of them just send it in the groupchats - so they put in the extra effort to make it more personal and less like they're just going with everyone else

and like right on midnight i immediately got beautiful messages from 3 of my besties, and ofc lots of birthdays wishes from mutuals and friends on a discord sever, so many people putting in effort and so fast too. my niece and nephew made drawings especially for me and my niece insisted on cutting paper in half so she could draw even more things and they made me a goodie bag with little gifts and such too. like even the kids put in a lot of effort

but what really gets me is multiple people telling me they're glad i'm alive and they hope to celebrate more birthdays with me, and people in my family wishing for me to have a better future specifically, and people saying they love me and-

it feels very surreal. dgmw i am very touched. as a person who, well, is not the biggest fan of life, and very much did not plan to get to the age of 25, it feels. weird.

birthdays are always a hard time because of that ajdkflglh ever since i was a teen really, i always become even more suicidal on the days leading up to it, like some sense of "i won't reach [age]. i can't. i shouldn't" and as you can tell it did not go further than that lol. i think i end up crying or having a major breakdown p much on every birthday, up until maybe the last 2 (as in, 24 and 25) bc it always feels like i lost, failed in achieving my ultimate goal

and. i guess. seeing this much love, that i didn't expect but i know is there even when it's not verbally expressed. makes it feel less like losing? i can't name what it does feel like - i'm not well versed in positive emotions lol - but it's not negative that's for sure. except maybe it starts being distressing bc i don't understand it :P but that's a me issue hehe.

and. i don't want to live for other people. i have gone past the point of "mom would be sad" years ago. which i think is why it feels so weird. bc it does feel nice, to know people are happy that i'm alive, and that they genuinely want me to be happy, even when i don't

even when I'm thinking "god i'm already this old and haven't achieved anything in my entire life". these people don't care about that. that's why they wish for a better future. what i achieved, to them, is being a kind person i think

idk how to finish this ajdkflg like i said i'm just putting thoughts in words. and crying bc now my bday is over so i can do it without feeling like i failed at some unspoken goal. i always say i'm not good at love, and that goes for being loved too, i feel like a deer in the headlights lol 😭 but it's okay. idk if i'll ever get used to it or learn how to actually accept it rather than just pretend i do, but maybe i don't need to know?

#vent #but a positive one. i think #sorry. ok i'm going to sleep now. maybe. hopefully

[fowl-leaf]

my 2023 summary of art!

Template:here

still not consistently posting anywhere, but I like doing these. they're fun there's a lot of things i would've liked to include but had to exclude, due to not being shareable on this account. maybe i'll have more stuff next year!

this is long, so details under the cut

JANUARY silly lizard oc i generally dont do much single line hatching, so it was nice to fiddle with it this time

FEBRUARY the wittle scrunkly lizard last time i drew this one, they were an lps shitpost, so its nice to like draw them normally lol

MARCH herman is running out of time glasses axolotl but make him neon idk

APRIL fancy calico i honestly dont know whats up with the clothes, i just kinda drew whatever tbh

MAY yippie!! toontown oc! was playing ttcc w/shard and co, this is the character i ended up making i also got covid around april-march iirc so i was feeling horrid for a while (and the remaining symptoms didnt clear up till like june)

JUNE an oc i got years ago but didnt have the confidence to draw for a while lmao anyways i like her colors and shape, she's fun

JULY mandatory artfight posting this was one of the last ones i did! ocs belong to pookapooka and they were so fun to paint

idk if ill be doing artfight again tbh. ive been doing it consistently since sun vs moon but its honestly felt less fun ever since the tiktok invasion`and how ppls behavior has changed, and especially since the whole ownership thing that happened mid fight this year. (not interested in any of the alternatives ive seen either bc they have the same issues, notably worse issues, or are not furry friendly) but tbh that might just be me being disenchanted with online art spaces due to the intensifying shittification of basically everything, fucking rip

AUGUST ring but hes going to jail (again but for real this time) the staxie monthly prompt was barbie mugshots but i . . . i did this with ring and lumos and promptly forgor to do this with cakes and ale like i was planning to lmfao im actually gonna watch the barbie movie tonight, renting it so i can watch it on the big tv (didnt watch in theaters bc expensive (movie tickets are generally 15-25 bucks in my area (compared to the 5-10 in my aunt's area (renting is cheaper per person)), and they changed the chairs to these weird uncomfy pleather recliners that make my skin crawl to "justify the price raise" + i hate sitting for more than an hour i need water, bathroom, stretch, and snack breaks))

SEPTEMBER ganache went over the hedge was very busy w/projects so i did little casual art this was inspired by me comparing the over the hedge version of supermarket by ben folds (upbeat & high energy) vs the one by the clash (melancholy + commercial-induced agony) ever since then i cant stop thinking abt how much the lemon demon guy's voice sounds like the fucking clash guy sdjkhfkjsd also over the hedge was one of my favorite movies as a kid and i watched it at least 10 times before we had to return the dvd to netflix. i also regularly played the flash games on the site until i forgot about it after finding out about miniclip + notdoppler from other kids and decided to use those for flash games instead bc more options lol

OCTOBER dta img for a new oc i got, funny long neck budgie thingy busy w/projects again so little casual art had to use old mini tablet bc previous tablet was completely unusable fucking rip

NOVEMBER ganache + cactus pony, they want to know if you have any bubblegum. do you? busy w/projects again so little casual art doodle i made in heavypaint (one of the old layerless versions, i bought a lisence for it a while ago.) i got a new tablet on black friday since the mini tablet was horrible + my broken tablet was making me work very slow

DECEMBER ring in the void (this is lore accurate) or as nic put it, "fucked up twilight sparkle" lol busy w/projects + gifts so little casual art i actually sketched this w/the mini tablet, but didnt finish it up till getting the new tablet

---

for reading this far, you get to see amogus.

i would've put amogus whisper on the chart but decided against it since im not done with that one yet lmao

#summary of art #2023 summary of art #my art #oc art #no organization tags bc that would be hell

[nirvanai]

Would you rather Tearer has half of Ryuki's brother's face instead of a grey carapace? Or Ryuki's brother having never existed and Ryuki is suffering some severe Mandela Effect?

not gonna lie I saw a fanart of tearer with half of ryuki’s brother’s face on twitter a while ago and that au concept has lived rent free in my mind ever since (can’t find the link rn but if anyone can pls leave it in a reply bc its Great and ppl should get to see it). Its the absolutely perfect delightfully fucked up sort of angst that I think could be really fun. the idea of his brother having never actually existed is an interesting one, but I feel like it’d end up sorta removing some of the impact of a lot of his motivation and stuff, if that makes sense? He’s living for the memory of his brother, so having that all fake would be kinda less interesting to me.

with that first concept though. oh man. oh boy. it could be So much. given the resources that naix had, it’s not impossible to conceptualize, just. extremely super fucked up. (which... fits Naix pretty well considering the shit chikara and tokiko were willing to do lmao stealing half the face of a dead teen wouldn’t be outside the realm of possibility for those two).

(it got long again so the rest under a cut. also edit: found the tweet i was thinking about! cw eye horror/alcohol in the link)

like first of all. just imagine a version of ryuki’s confrontation with tearer 6 years ago at the cathedral where he found that out. he shoots at tearer and breaks half of his mask- the opposite half that date shoots. and you see ryuki’s own face. like. that would Ruin Him even before hitting him with the EM waves to take tama out.

Or alternatively, that confrontation goes the same, but rather than date and bibi seeing “Jin’s” face, they see “Ryuki’s” face- especially considering we literally just saw ryuki and tearer talking face to face, it’d be... the exact sort of wild insane plot twist i would not put past Uchikoshi lmao.

so while the player is just absolutely losing their mind over “what the fuck did ryuki’s twin survive somehow” the story keeps moving on, and then you find the half a body in the cathedral, and its “ryuki”. so there’s that moment of “WHAT THE FUCK NO-” before you realize its uru and great googly moogly its all gone to shit.

shoutouts to that meaning ryuki would basically have to see his brother’s dead body. Again. but this time its his face being worn by a serial killer, the exact sort of person Yukuto wanted to Stop. that would be, uh, deeply upsetting to someone like him! I will say, if anything, I feel like it’d make Ryuki just hate Tearer even more- like, he already hates criminals. Knowing that a very dangerous and violent criminal had literally stolen his brother’s face? Oh Man would that piss him off.

It’d also be very interesting to see how that could further play around with Amame and Ryuki’s relationship and parallels- how she views him and thinks of him, having killed someone with half a face that looked just like his. Would she hate him for thinking he’d related to Tearer? Or would she freak out a bit more, feeling like she’s being haunted by the person she killed? Plenty of interesting options. 

Also I just. would Desperately hope that the epilogue would include more talk between ryuki and the mizukis and them like... checking in to make sure he’s ok. like. christ that’s some additional trauma to add to the trauma pile. it’d be a very interesting way to link Ryuki back to Horadori more though.

Honestly if we get a DLC or a third game I’m very curious if Uchikoshi has any more plans to expand upon Ryuki’s past. the fact that he’s suggested a name for his twin but hasn’t actually committed to one (and specifically stated its not Canon), plus a handful of older twitter replies abt ppls thoughts on ryuki, makes me hope so. I’d really love to see more about him he’s so interesting. 

#replies #kuruto ryuki #aini #aini spoilers #nirvana initiative #nirvana initiative spoilers #mariogman25 #the way this could be used to have a *double* ryuki dead fakeout in the game #fucked up and evil moments tbqh #but yeah its a very fun au to think about #very much a horror setup type thing #but i mean the game is an M rated murder mystery so that works-

[replicasoul]

vent? i guess

was in bed for i think 11 hrs earlier and maybe 3-5 hrs of that was sleep, which i think is the most ive gotten in a few days now. love that the protrusion pressing into my spinal cord means that laying down On A Pillow is like, what ends up being one of the most painful things for me like straight up feels like my arms + wrists + face + jaw are being like, hooked up to a car battery hhhhhhhhhow the fuck am i supposed to sleep cravings for alcohol or sleep meds to just conk myself the fuck out rly arent helping either, much less that i dont have much money to spend on things like that i rly shouldnt even be Typing this much bc repetitive motion makes my arms hurt worse but like, gotta get this shit out somehow or my brain will just Melt cant followup w/ that doctor re: the MRI til early december so just gotta Suck It Up (and then hes apparently going on an 'extended leave/vacation so if we dont get smth figured out then then who knows how long ill have to wait) anyway i hate to vent but i figure its better to put it on here under a cut where most ppl will probably scroll past rather than going to bother friends abt shit i cant do shit about for like the billionth time idk. just rambling at this point. could try to pass out again but if i take pain meds and it Doesnt work then i have to wait a while to take more or risk serotonin syndrome so wheeeeeeeeee but yea, gonna try and go get my shit together, or go pass out, one of the two. feel free to disregard this

[giggly-argent]

ok Zero relationship rambling under the cut-

(again in order of least to most reasonable)

Jana

Obviously not gonna happen but these two bonded so quickly over having to keep Gattina in check 💀

plus they're both big, strong n hot so my brain just did the math automatically-

But they're both very busy on opposite sides of the kingdom so they don't really keep in touch often :(

Maybe Jana could teach Zero a sport or two...

Hades

Also not gonna happen but they're kinda cute tho!

They're the two strongest (known) and highest ranking demons in the kingdom, but they can't talk to each other like normal ppl at first 😭😭

Hades has to work on getting Zero to be less subservient (while he unlearns tht trait himself), and they do end up as pretty good friends~

no matter what, Hades still throws some shady verbal teases at Zero when they're alone (lee to lee communication)

Gattina

this is my #1 guilty pleasure oc ship I think!

Gattina's the first person in Zero's life to ever beat him in a fight (even if it wasn't Totally fair) and honestly? that's kinda hot to him!

he's not gonna let it happen again thooo

And in Gatti's case, she just likes hearing him raise his voice whenever she does smth stupid

Like with Jana, he's usually holding her back from an Actual Fight, but w/ Zero she'll deliberately do something outta pocket just to have him grab her by the arm and give her a stern look-

He knows what she's doin 👀

Shura

oughhg the pains the angst,,,

These two were the best of friends as kids, and they already dated thru their teenage years before Shura got possessed left the village </3

I haven't decided whether I wanna let Shura Survive the plot yet but even if he does, I might not put him back with Zero fully bc of the bad stuff he did 😳

Zero still has light feelings for Shura in Any continuity tho :')

Izzy

this one came outta fuckin nowhere tbh!

These two are the definition of hydrogen bomb vs coughing baby (radiation dog vs banjo wielding puppy idk)

the shawl that Izzy wears is the one Zero used to wear when he still lived in Asayesa, and Izzy wouldn't let a single thing happen to it 💖

Izzy's the first one of the Asayesa gang to actually go visit Zero at the castle! (minus Shura but that wasn't a good visit 💀)

Zero usually has to scoop Izzy up out of some kind of peril, but he doesn't mind bc his lil country boy is just too goofy n cute!!

In return, he gets plenty of teasing and kisses an-[Removed for 'Too Affectionate' Crimes]

oh also they play music together anytime they get the chance to :)

Meri

getting into the Intended Relationships now :)

Traumabonding 3.0

Another Stoic/Silly ship, but the silly is mostly hidden on Meri's side

These two are both sooo used to forcing themselves to act super professional. They're always in the public eye, being scrutinized over every little detail...

They finally get to meet in private when Zero accidentally ends up in Zidenna's garden, and that becomes their secret meeting place whenever they both have spare time on their schedule 🖤

Aries

already muchotexto'd about these two in the last one-

Zidenna

childhood friends to lovers trope my beloved 💚 (+size diff my Ultra Beloved)

Super Gigantic Traumabonding 4.0

It takes Zero a pretty long time to warm up to his other coworkers, but the day he sees Zidenna again he's acting like they weren't even separated for 15 years~

Zinny's always hovering around Zero, playing with his hair or pinching his cheeks and ears just to idle, and he lets it happen (you can even catch his tail wagging if it goes on long enough :) )

Zidenna's clownery kinda rubs off on him sometimes! They've convinced him to play lil pranks on Noel or Aries every once in a while

Anytime they walk past Zero, they have to make sure they're not Too close or he's gonna scoop them up in a big hug and Not let go for a bit :'D

(they both think Meri is fine as hell-)

I could go on about these goofies for centuries but I shouldn't 💔

Zin & Meri

This one is Zero's definite endgame for sure,, it makes the most sense!

Zinny joins in on the little meetings once they figure out Zero and Meri are using their garden for em, and it just blooms from there!

#my ocs #//Zero #//Jana #//Hades #//Gattina #//Shura #//Izzy #//Merias #//Aries #//Zidenna #so many... #Zero/Estelle was a Slight possibility (theyre both group moms) but Es is getting w Zero's brother 💀 #hmmm who should i do this with next...

[moonlightcookie]

hey since there was recently a big ol Dramabomb on twitter over seamoon, i figured i would finally put into words how i feel about all this, esp the whole "toxic seamoon shipper" myth.

transcript under the cut

[transcript: anyway since i saw some more dumb shit this morning: lesbians being protective of seamoon isnt just us "making it our whole personality" (and even if someone were, who cares? not hurting anybody) or us thinking we're defending the honor of a fictional ship. i dont know how else to beat it into ur dumb fucking skulls that representation MATTERS. we get defensive we ppl wanna shit on + disregard canon lesbian representation bc there's so little good rep out there! especially coming from a huge franchise that isn't a childrens cartoon (e.g. SU, SPOP, TOH)

we get defensive when we see ppl treat characters we see ourselves in BECAUSE of their canon lesbianism like shit!! because to me personally, if u can't even respect fictional lesbians, how tf can i respect u to respect ME, a real living lesbian??

i honestly don't know how to make this any clearer for yall: we are NOT telling you that u HAVE to ship or even actively enjoy it. all we're asking is for you to respect it and the fact of it being canon, and ESPECIALLY to stop giving us grief when we say it's canon, since that seems to be the biggest issue with people for some reason?? just because a ship is canon does not mean you can't also ship something else, as long as you're not erasing lesbian rep (meaning Dont ship sea fairy with men, moonlight is less strictly lesbian coded so go ahead ig)

if you prefer one or both of them with some other women, go ahead. despite my personal feelings on it, it's not like... problematic or anything? i have genuinely NEVER seen a seamoon stan harass someone for shipping, say, bluemoon, kumimoon or sea fairy/ice captain. additionally, never ever EVER have i or even seen any other seamoon tell anyone to kll themselves over the ship. NEVER. if yall wanna claim that shit, yall gonna have to provide names and screenshots otherwise you're just talking out of your ass + only serve to further push the stigma of seamoon/its fans. i know seamoon is still enjoyed (or seen neutrally) by the majority of the fandom, but it still hurts to see such a vocal minority be so vitriolic about something that means so much to me, as a lesbian who sees a lot of myself in moonlight.

this is something ive had to fight for + deal w for at least 3 years, across different platforms. this is so much more than just a fictional ship to me (+ other lesbians), these two are a beautiful representation of who we are, how we love, and especially the hurdles we face in our relationships.

transcript end]

#moon.txt #sf #ml #seamoon #figured id post all this here too bc. its relevant! i was the one who got the whole toxic shipper thing started #all bc i made a post 3 yrs ago saying seamoon was canon #and ppl got mad at me and harassed me over it and i defended myself!

[a-wild-things-rambles]

[click for better quality and full size]

so, this collection of pieces are all heavily inspired by @finalgirljasontodd 's amazing fic red shift abut the cosmic mistakes trio. these pieces are most heavily inspired by the third paragraph:

"In the bathroom, Kyle is hunched over the sink. A red line of saliva is drawn between his lip and the porcelain. He spits. Blood splats into the basin. He cups his hand under the faucet and drinks until he can't taste metal anymore."

under the cut are non yellow versions and some notes as well as a bonus drawing

so i understand the yellow is off putting and was artistic license on my part, i used the yellow as i wanted to show how kyle is still haunted by the after math of his time as paralax, but he is turned away from it [he is always facing away from the yellow light] he is also tuned towards the green [the dark green shadows] but he is still in the middle [gray/white for ion] affected by both. his linework is sketchy- especially compared to the water, sink, tap or tiles- he is unsure of himself. but he is a green lantern at core- the neon green linework.

also bonus from the line "His notebook’s still on the kitchen counter—as he collects a pair of bowls and opens up the cereal box, he notices the broken pencil’s still sitting on top of it. Only now someone has taken a knife and shaved the splintered edge to a gentle, neat point."

yes i sharpened one of my pencils w a knife to a nice point to use for a reference in a piece that you cant really tell if its knife sharpened.

my tags which i think are important- its strange to be on the other side of analysis, with the ability to know what the intentions of the piece were, so when using my analysts eye i can pick up on meanings i dint mean to happen, whether they go against or with the intentions. also how different perspectives can read different ideas- leading to different conclusions. idk this shit is cool and i love hearing ppls interpretations of my work so leave it in the tags! [you win my undying gratitude]

#i have just realized i could have don the highlights red. cause red-shift#and it would contrast better w the green#but it would make the blood stand out less#the blood is an important part#especially with it contrasting the gods not bleeding idea#something something expression of mortality#also the yellow green are ajasent not contrasting#so it shows how it can be easy to slip between the two#especialy given the amount of gl who have become yl and vice versa#not especially happy with the fact i colured the water yellow#it makes sense- yellow lighting#but makes it look like hes accepting the yellow[parallax]#i feel it gives of the wrong connotations#but you could say the worry he has about god/his place means he is feeling fear#but it can be hard to have prefect ideas#we are human and our minds will always find patterns that were not intended#some of wich may go against the original idea#but are valid and interesting interpretations that are not wrong#just different from intended

ok i swaer im gonna stop adding to this but i went in more depth[and sense] in a post i just wrote here

#kyle rayner #green lantern #thebirdarts #cw: blood #realy proud of this #look at me putting meaning and symbolums in my art #cw eyestrain #just to be safe

[thevalleyoftriumph]

I would love to see your sillies :D (madcom ocs)

OK OK SO !! IM GONNA PUT IT UNDER A CUT CUZ IM GONNA INCLUDE... IMAGEZ.. AND RAMBLE A BIT ABT TEHM

GENERAL WARNINGZ FOR UHH. BLOOD N STUFF. ONE OF THE DOODLEZ HAZ A BIT OF FACE GORE. PAR FOR THE COURSE FOR MADCOM STUFF

OK SOOOO. FIRST OC. their ref iz a little old n messy buuut

here iz creature! theyre a project nexus oc based around arena mode! their origin iz offering, obvi, but my personal lore for them iz so . Out There.

so basically.. creature iznt the person who got offered up. creature iz the entity POSSESSING the body. creature iz originally a weird little facet of auditor themself, a piece of their powerz and body plucked off and given life. given the fact that they were only a small part of auditor, it couldnt leave the other place, but had a strong desire to do so.

when the ppl sacrificed the host body, it saw thiz az an opportunity and quickly took hold, possessing the body az the old host died. briefly they actually got to speak due to thiz!

herez a lil image i did recently of creature and their host separate

due to being literally just.. a part of the auditor, creature haz a few similaritiez to them!

however, thiz odez not make them like the auditor exactly. in fact, due to the fact that taking root in a body with preexisting memoriez passed the memoriez onto them [memoriez of dying, of the role the employerz played in it, etc] it gained a fear of the auditor. itz terrified of them coming back to take them away, to return it to the rest of their powerz, effectively killing them.

creature iz relatively close to the SQ boyz. theyre pretty attached to 2b, and are very fond of sanford and deimos. theyre also often seen with skinner, who haz to often change their bandagez when 2b iznt able to.

creature haz a strong disliking towardz hank, and steerz clear when possible. im not exactly sure WHEN arena mode takez place in the project nexus timeline, but if it takez place after story mode, then creature would be less.. afraid, and more just pissed off. by the time theyd learn abt hank they would already be close to the otherz, so theyd see him turning on them az a sort of. punishable offense.

oh, uh! and bcoz theyre possessing a corpse, their hair never growz anymore, and they cant heal very well! their time iz Incredibly limited.

back when i first cut my hair, i actually did a little comic for creature asking for the same thing! so herez that, itz kinda old lol :] i have yet to draw them w short hair lol

anywayz, so thatz creature !!!! i love them very much, feel free to ask me about them <3

=====

next up iz my most recent oc, felix!! hez just a normal madcom oc lol

now i know what ur thinking. "oh austin, soldatz dont get demoted! they just die!" and to that i say fuck u i make the rulez

anywayz. what his deal iz basically, he joined the aahw early on in itz creation. he waz around when everything waz Normal, and waz scared and stressed about everything, and waz very desperate for something Normal. the auditor promised him that if he joined them, theyd offer protection in return for servicez. they also promised that the agency would eventually return the world to normal, which sealed the deal for felix

obviously he started az just a normal grunt, but climbed the rankz pretty quickly. not even due to any skillz, just simply because he waz weirdly optimistic. he managed to boost the morale of most gruntz or agentz he worked with, which - due to it boosting general efficiency - caught the auditorz attention. their logic, in making him a soldat, waz that hed be able to spread 'good morale' to more important groupz, and be able to up their efficiency.

he usually worked with a group of agentz and engineerz, but would often get sent to work with the mag agentz! hez really close to torture specifically, and likez just rambling around him.

aside from being good morale, felix was also a good shot! waz real good w longer distance gunz n stuff, lookout too sometimez. unfortunately, thiz often got him stationed at high risk areaz, which led to his group eventually being absolutely decimated by hank. he waz literally the only survivor, and it waz by pure luck.

hank had actually like.. ripped out his little. eye thing. which waz Surgically Attached. so that waznt really fun! felix tried putting it back in but had messed up, making it kinda permanently lopsided.

auditor had initially debated finishing him off when they came to check out the damagez, but decided to keep him around and heal him up for future use. he waz stationed to stay ONLY with the magz, due to his relation with torture . it waz basically so that he could keep an eye on them and help them redirect their frustrationz before any massacrez could happen lol.

eventually though, he became paranoid of sticking around. he didnt show it outwardly, and haz a habit of bottling his emotionz, but he waz terrified that any day would be his last, that auditor would have finally found a replacement for him and kill him off - soldatz dont get demoted, after all. they just die.

he payz attention to the people who get caught dissenting, he takez a note out of 2bz book, and now he planz in secret to escape one day. he doez a pretty good job of keeping it under wrapz, but he planz to ask torture to come with him when he leavez! he wouldnt forgive himself if he left torture to stay. :]

herez a doodle page i did <3

yes. i like the thought of felix and torture being a lil more than friendz. partnerz, perhapz. dont yell at me im living vicariously thru felix [i really like torture hez neat to me]

OH and deimos and sanford dont really like felix. hez a soldat, not an engineer, but that doeznt really change the fact that his coworkerz killed deimos at some point. so theyre very cautious around him.

hank just wantz to finish what he started.

=====

ANYWAYZ !!!!! thoze are my little guyz <333 i wanna make more ocz in the future but for now... i am content with two little guyz

FEEL FREE 2 ASK ME QUESTIONZ !!!! I LOOVE LOVE LOVE TALKING ABT MY LITTLE GUYZ theyre so scrimbly bimbly to me. the mipy, if you will.

#uhh. sure ill add a tag to thiz. #madcom oc #i wrote a mile worth abt my ocz i will make it Everyonez problem #|| #kitkat chitchat #kits doodles #kits ocs #creature | oc #felix | oc