#i was conned into dating her and then i found put she was a trump supporter

[cooper-r-r-jones]

Con Wrap up

I went to Comic Con last week and here’s what I did.  Sorry for the long post.

Thursday: Got to the convention center early and was expecting a long line since I was headed to Ballroom 20.  However there wasn’t.  There was approximately 50 people in front of me which is unheard of.  I couldn’t help but wonder where everyone else was.  Cause Ballroom 20 is always packed!  Regardless I got in and was 7 rows away from the front.

First off was From the Bridge which is a documentary by Spencer F. Lee about the evolution scifi, fantasy, and horror and how it shaped society.  How it kind of seemed childish and there really wasn’t a place that people could go to for these genres.  Seems really interesting and I wish I could’ve see more.  The documentary won’t be out til I believe November.

Got stuck watching the reboot of Charmed, wasn’t a fan the first time.  Then Tell Me A Story which will be on CBS all access.  A retelling of fairy tales with modern settings.  On the fence about that one.  Next up was A Discovery of Witches, it’s a book series that will turn into a tv series.  Again on the fence about this one, a woman is a witch but denies it cause of what happened to her family.  And she ends up falling for a vampire.

Then it was Bobcat Goldthwait’s Monsters and Misfits a tv series that has monsters and such but humorously done.  An example being a guy goes on a date with a mermaid or a news reporter exposes some guy running for mayor as a werewolf.  Seems funny.  Finally I was waiting for Niantic’s panel and about 5 minutes before it comes on, someone over the intercom announces it’s been cancelled >_< then walked around the exhibit floor a bit.

Friday: Got into the Indigo Ballroom and saw Adventure Time.  Saw exclusives for the movie that’s coming out.  Looks like it’s going to be a battle between Princess Bubblegum and her Uncle Gumbald.  Also incredibly sad that this is the last season.  Found myself nearly crying when I was watching John DiMaggio trying to hold it together himself.  The show has been on for 10 years!

Fooly Cooly was immediately afterwards, most of it was taken up by a preview of the first episode of season 3.  It was great listening to Kari Wahlgren (Haruko).  Also what I thought was interesting was that the CEO of Production I.G. mentioned that the were looking for different directors who had never seen FLCL and see their take on the series.  The things he wanted for sure in the series was that it was set in the same world, Haruko was in it, wanted the original creators/writers/etc. for the series, and The Pillows must do the music.  I like season 2 and I can’t wait for season 3.

Next up was Dream Corp LLC off Adult Swim, not my cup of tea.  Tried to like it but I found it to be annoying.  Then Venture Bros, wondering if I should start this series or not.  Tried to years ago but it didn’t do anything for me.  Maybe things have changed?  Robot Chicken was next on the list, I remember liking it as a kid but now it just bugs me.  Again tried to like it but I couldn’t.

My last panel of that day was Final Space, I waiting to see Olan Rogers.  The cast was hilarious, it just got picked up for season 2.  It’s a very silly series but it also has a lot of sad and real moments within it.  I think my favorite bit was when Coty Galloway (Avocato) saw his name sign with the voices he was doing next season.  The sign said “various” as in various voices, he thought a character had that name XD

Saturday: Got into the Indigo Ballroom again to see Steven Universe.  Holy crap we got to see a new episode and what White Diamond looks like.  We’re also getting a movie! Listening to Rebecca Sugar is always great, just found out she see’s herself as non-binary.

Afterwards I rushed over to Room 6BCF to see Quick Draw that’s always funny to watch.  Usually there’s Sergio Aragones and Scott Shaw but there’s always a guest and this time it was Lalo Alcaraz.  He does political comics, a lot of Trump related junk, my sides were hurting.

Cartoon Voices was up with people like J. P. Karliak (The Boss Baby: Back in Business, The New Looney Tunes), Julie Nathanson (Skylanders, Avengers Assemble), John Mariano (Animaniacs, Hey Arnold!), Kari Wahlgren (Bunnicula, Fooly Cooly), Roger L. Jackson (The Powerpuff Girls, Ghostface), Matthew Mercer (Thundercats, Overwatch).  They read a script that was Rapunzel but put their twist on it and again I died laughing. 

Then went to the exhibit hall and bought more junk I probably don’t need.  Did the same thing on Sunday.  Will post the pics I took however I’ve been having trouble with my phone.  So I apologize, they might not be up til tomorrow

#me #my life #comic con #comic con 2018 #sdcc #sdcc 2018

[coldheartedkitsune]

Bittersweet Candy Bowl: Actor AU

- The cast go by different names in the show. Sometimes they call each other by their stage names when they tease each other. - Abbey is a young Shakespearean actor who is super talented and nobody truly knows why he asked for a role. * He just so happens to be a huge fan of teen dramas and wanted to give it a shot. He also wanted to support his friends who had just made their big break onset. - No one knows (or doesn't want to know) if half the stuff David says is improvised or what the director told him to say. - Lucy and Jordan aren't actually related. However, they still act like siblings offset and are practically inseparable. * They are also the reason that ‘The List of Things We Should Never, Ever Do’ was made. * At the end of any huge dramatic scene that involves one of them, the other can be found cuddling them and offering them Starbucks. - Paulo and Rachel’s chemistry on set is actually a real thing. Rachel was part of Paulo’s band a few years back, so they've known each other for quite some time. * They've been dating for 4 years now. * Whenever someone pans Rachel with some PauloxLucy or PauloxMike spam on twitter, either Abbey or Jessica will post a link to a Star Trek battle scene with the caption ‘Fight me in the pit!’ written below. - Mike is native to Russia, but immigrated with his family when the government started cracking down on free speech. It has taken him years to perfect an American accent for acting reasons, but he sometimes lets his Russian accent loose whenever he screws up a line or whenever he’s offset. - Mike is a famous Russian pop artist, Paulo has been labeled as the next John Lennon, and Augustus is the lead vocalist of a band similar to Oingo Boingo. * When Lucy reveals she had no musical experiences when her character was suppose to reveal she had a beautiful singing voice, the three singers immediately volunteered to train her. What followed was one hospital visit, $5,000 dollars of property damage, threats of lawsuit against the studio, and 17 more things added to The List. * At least Lucy learned to sing better in the end. - Jazzmine’s snapchat, that is all. - When Abbey was introduced into the cast, a rumor popped up saying that he and Paulo hate each other in real life as well. In reality, their rivalry only stems down to the two arguing over who ate the last taco (it's Daisy, it's always Daisy). - Paulo, Abbey, and Augustus have been best friends ever since they starred in a horror movie together. - Mike, Lucy, Paulo, and Daisy use some of their free time on visiting their fans in the hospital. - “Dracula’s balls”, “Jesus Christ on a broomstick”, “Sweet, merciful pandas”, and “Emperor help me” are some of the many improvised curses David comes up with whenever he screws up a line. - Abraham, Abbey’s dad, is literally the sweetest guy off stage. He gives advice to the younger actors about future roles, always brings hot chocolate with him, and is literally the king of dad jokes. * When the scene where Abbey’s character confronted his abusive father came up, Abraham wasted no time to use all his dad jokes. * “I'm not afraid of you anymore!” “Really? Should I have brung my werewolf mask? That thing’s scary as fuck!” “CUT!!!” - When Season 5 (volume 4) was being marketed, the marketing kept hyping up that someone on the main cast was leaving. Purposefully, they kept theories that Lucy was leaving away and tried focusing on either Paulo or Sandy. * The directors laughed silently as they watch Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr explode with shock when Lucy was put on the bus. - Sandy and Mike began dating in real life soon after Season 3 (volume 2). According to Mike, she understands what it's like to flee a hostile country and make a home in a place where you're scorned at. According to Sandy, he's one of the few people in her life to make her laugh. - Jessica, Amaya, and Matt are gay in real life and onstage. In fact, it has become a fact that everyone who stars in the show isn't 100% straight. - Paulo and Lucy both confessed that they were bisexual at a Comic-Con Q&A. When a fan jokingly asked if she was willing to take on Mike and Sandy at the same time, she wrapped an arm around Daisy waist, pulled the mic real close, and stated “Sorry honey, but I've been tapping this fine lady’s ass for 2 years now.” before kissing her in front of hundreds of screaming fans. - Sue and Alejandro are the biggest trolls in the cast. Not only have they made several blogs dedicated to shipping their fellow cast members and theorizing crazy things that would soon happen on the show (but usually no one would believe them), they're also responsible for 75% of the things posted on the list. * They'll still do those things no matter what, just not in her public eye. - Alejandro accidentally hit Lucy for real when he swiped at her face and spent the next half hour freaking out and trying to bandage her face up. - Mike and Lucy nearly went into a mental breakdown after filming ‘December’. It was decided that the show would go into a hiatus for a couple of months while the leads recovered. * The episode actually strengthened the friendship between the two and, for every episode Mike was in, Lucy was determined to help him in both costumes and makeup. - When Lucy came back, the first take she did saw her bust through the wall with John Cena’s theme blaring out of a speaker. * “WHAT’S UP, BITCHES!?!” - Sometimes the cast try to play on the huge shipping wars by flirting with each other or stage kissing in public. It was later added to The List. - When Abbey was asked what if he had to change anything to his character, he coldly replied: “Not treating my girlfriend like property or going full Trump on my friends.” - During a snowstorm that saw most of the cast showed in, they spent the night having a Disney sing off. Paulo and David won after singing ‘Gaston’. - No one dares to bet anything against Sandy after proving she can play Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2 blindfolded to Paulo. The poor fool had to walk around set wearing nothing but a cardboard box for the rest of the week.

#bittersweet candy bowl #bcb #cat drama #mikebcb #lucybcb #paulobcb #daisybcb #I want these kids to be happy #actor au #au

[ahnsael]

Like seriously, two days ago my mom and I talked about my dad. She said she couldn’t understand why he treated me as the bastard child (I was literally from his own seed -- and yet my little sister, who WAS born under a different father, while my mom and dad were still married -- got treated like a queen by him).

This is gonna become a long rant,

Gonna put a Read More here, because this shit’s about to get deep. And ugly. Content warnings now for all sorts of abuse...I’d get specific, but...there were SO MANY kinds. If abuse isn’t something you wanna read about, no matter what kind of abuse you don’t want to see, read no farther. I probably have that kind of abuse behind the Read More.

I mean...obviously my younger sister’s parentage is not her fault. That was all on my mom.

But he accepted her as her own. Which...hey, fantastic. I like to see that kind of love in the world.

But me? I was his own seed (people have said “are you sure?” but seriously...I look in the mirror and I see his dumb ass looking back at me (and I HATE that I look so much like this asshole -- he’s dead, and I STILL can’t get away from him). 

But I have his genes, whether I like it or not; I wish I looked like ANYBODY IN THE WORLD other than him, but I can’t controli that. Okay, maybe I’d rather look like my biological father than to look like Donald Trump, but...that’s LITERALLY the only person who I’d want less to look like. I hate looking like the guy who abandoned me, but I’d hate ever more if I looked like the dumbass who attempts to lead our country right now.

Make me look like Chunk in Goonies. Make me look like any other ugly person you can think of, the ugliest person you can think of. I mean, I’m forever single anyway (seriously, I’m 42½ years old -- the last time I seriously dated someone was before my birthday in 2008, when I was 33). I’d rather be ugly and stay single than to be attractive and end up with someone wrong for me.

I’d rather look like that than either Donald Trump OR my biological dad (who, honestly, would probably LOVE Donald Trump, because my dad was a hypocritical asshole who loved the church, but used all the sermons he heard as reasons why, even if it wasn’t the nature of the sermon, white people should’t mix with black people).

Fuck him for that.

When he found out he was dying of cancer (which had spread through his whole body), he came up to Washington to visit me, both sisters, and my mom. And he said he wanted to take me out to dinner and patch things up.

I only went because so many people here told me that I’d forever regret it if I didn’t try to make amends. I don’t think I follow any of those people anymore. Because sometimes, you’ve been hurt too much, and the other person, even if they’re a parent, just don’t care about the pain they’ve caused, and think that a dinner will patch everything up without any actual emotional effort.

Or maybe, if this case, the people who said I had to “patch things up” were right, but didn’t take into account just how MUCH of an ass my biological dad was.

So we had dinner. Just him and I.

And he literally spent the entire time talking about the kid he adopted as soon as his marriage to my mom was officially over. “Oh, Joshua did this. Oh, Joshua is so good at that.”

He replaced me, basically.

35 or so years after he bailed on me, and ONCE in those 3 years remembered my birthday -- he sent me a $ AMWAY gift certificate because he, at the time, was an Amway salesman and thought he may get a commission off of me).

But this night, when he took me out to dinner (maybe thinking that an $8 dinner without any actual apology would make me love him again?) he wanted to talk about his OTHER son. Adopted (legally so, also), but still...his son. Instead of me.

And then I tried to make things right, because so many had told me that to NOT do so would lead to a lifetime of regret.

But...I emailed this asshole of a father many times after that night. I called him on his phone quite a few times, for almost a month (same with emails...I tried, every few days, for a month). No matter what I did, leaving messages on Facebook, leaving voicemail messages, trying to message him on Facebook...nothing worked.

And then my older sis (who stayed with him after he and my mom divorced; they gave each of us a say in who we stayed with, and since my older sister had a habit of trying to make my life miserable, and went with my dad, I stayed with my mom) told me that he would ONLY talk to me on public posts on Facebook. This fucking asshole wanted to show all of his friends that “look, I’m making up with my estranged son before I die” so they would love him more than his con-artist ass was already loved by fools. I refused. If he wanted to talk to me, he had my email. He had my phone number. He knew my address if he wanted to mail something (after 35+ birthdays that he forgot).

And then we got a call from his wife. He’s about to die, and he wants to see all of us over Thanksgiving weekend. Seriously, FUCK THAT. I wasn’t gonna go. His ass willfully ignored me, after he showed up in Washington and PRETENDED to give a shit about me once, and then spent our entire meal talking about his adopted son...and never once mentioned how much he had missed me.

I know now that my biological dad is nothing but an asshole. But when I was a kid, he was EVERYTHING to me. And then he pulled it all away. Ever hear “Father of Mine 

Both my older sister (his other kid with my mom) and my younger sis (my mom’s kid with a different dad -- I won’t pretend that my mom is innocent in everything that happened, but at least she was FUCKING THERE when any of us three needed it -- well, except that I spent every Little League game with NOBODY cheering for me in the crowd, because this was between the first divorce and the birth of my little sis, and the marriage of my mom and little sis’ dad -- during my games she was off having sex with him, glad to be rid of me for an hour or two and basically my entire childhood sucked except if I was at Disneyland at that particular moment and could escape everything that was happening in real life).

Like I said, neither of my parents are innocent. But my mom learned how to be a supportive parent. My dad never did. So she still gets the benefit of the doubt.

There are only two graves that I will dance (and possibly piss on) if I ever happen upon them. One is Evil Stepdad #1. Seriously, he abused my little sister. He abused my mom. He tried to abuse me once (and partially succeeded -- he slammed my neck in a car door and I was bleeding profusely, but lived -- and the chickenshit cops who we called, even after seeing the blood I was losing, said “try to get along so we don’t have to come out here again” like WE did something wrong by BEING beaten by the fucking asshole). The one difference between me and my sis is that I was emotionally and physically abused. In her case, add sexually abused.

Granted, I was sexually abused before my little sis was born, by a cousin. So I’m not unfamiliar. But...she dealt with it more than I did. I remember two instances for myself, and maybe half a dozen times when I stepped in and stopped something that didn’t look right between her and Evil Stepdad #1

But in the end, I punched his fucking lights out...when I was 12 and he was 53. Because he wanted to “take my mom for a ride” -- after that same phrase had been used to dump pet dogs out of his van in unfamiliar neighborhoods since he was tired of having them around (this literally happened three times that I remember...maybe more).

So when he used that same language about my mom...I kicked his fucking ass. I wasn’t about to let that happen. He passed out drunk, and then woke up the next day with no memory of it, and asked my mom how he’d gotten the bloody lip. She didn’t tell him.

She also tried to get me to promise to never tell him that I had beat his sorry ass because I thought he was taking my mom out to shoot her.

20 years later, I’m living in Illinois. My mom and current-stepdad (not the BEST guy in the world, but DEFINITELY the best person my mom has married in her four attempts) are on vacation. Camping, if I remember right.

Evil Stepdad #1 calls. Wants to talk to my mom. She’s not there, but...I haven’t spoken to this asshole in 15 years. And I WANT to talk to him.

I tell him that the bloody lip in 1986 or so? That was me. Will I tell her to call you back when she gets home? Fuck you, I will not. I don’t even know how you got this number, but if you ever call it again I will find you, and I will LITERALLY end your life.

Granted, I didn’t follow through on that last bit. I don’t have the money. And I DID tell my mom that he had called when she got home (but didn’t give her the number, and also didn’t tell her that I had told him about the ass-kicking I gave him when I was 12).

But six months later he was dead from cancer. While my little sis is still torn over how to feel about this (after all, she’s his biological daughter, even after everything he put her through -- and she is more forgiving that I am towards MY bio dad who just pretended that I didn’t exist for 20 years), one of my happiest moments was when I had learned that he died.

And if I ever see his grave, by some chance, I WILL dance on it. I WILL piss on it (he deserves much worse, but without having toilet paper handy I can’t do the other thing I want to do on it). Odds are, though, that I’ll never find it. And I’m not gonna look for it. But...it one day, I see his name and the approximately right dates for birth and death...they better hope his tombstone can handle what I would do to it. Because seriously, fuck him.

You don’t get to treat me the way you did, and WORSE YET treat my mom and my little sister the way you treated them, and have me “respectfully view your memorial.” Fuck that entirely. I will desecrate his tombstone, memorial, or whatever the fuck is there if I ever actually see it (and I hope I never see it...I realize that what I would do would likely put me in jail -- but if I ever saw his name and the right dates on a tombstone, I’d do everything I could to DESTROY his resting place).

#daddy issues #but seriously FUCK my dad #I'm GLAD his ass is dead #at least now I don't have to wonder about half-hearted #well make that quarter-hearted #efforts to win me back after DECADES of him ignoring me #I don't get on the 'daddy issues' kick too often #because I KNOW I tried #and he wouldn't answer emails OR phone calls #but wanted to reconcile ONLY if it was public Facebook posts #so that apparently God could see him making amends (I guess God can't read messages and private posts) #He was trying to 'buy' his way into Heaven #but that's not how Heaven fucking works #I KNOW that I will never get into Heaven if it exists #because my dad was religious as FUCK and still an asshole #and it turned me off of religion completely #(as well as the church deacon who raped my mom but that's another story) #Most religious people I've knows have been absolute hypocrites #and I just can't associate with them #so fuck religion #and if this is who God has chosen #in his 'infinite wisdom' #and his 'omnipresence' and 'omnipotence' #if this is who God chooses to represent him #then fuck God also #I'd rather spend an eternity in Hell than one minute with the asshole that created all this strife and sorrow #And I'd rather go to Hell than spend time in Heaven with people who made my life miserable for DECADES #Not saying I WILL go to hell #I'm an atheist #because I cannot conceivably believe in a god who would make the world such a shitty place

[thelegendofclarke]

lmfaowow truly spoken like someone who has no idea what they are fucking talking about. you sound like a crazy bitch trump supporter shut the fuck up you don't get to have opinions or talk about other peoples triggers when you have no fucking idea.

Hm yeah ok. 

Well then buddyfriendpal, want to hear a fun fact about me!? I was date raped my freshman year of college. 

I usually never tell this story, it’s not a particularly good one. But APPARENTLY you have to provide your entire DNA profile and a full fucking notarized background check blessed by the Pope to get any respect or decency or have people treat you like a fellow human on this Blue Hellshite. So congrats, you are going to get the story in all it’s full, gruesome detail. 

I was date raped at a frat party my freshman year of college. I still don’t know what happened, I still have no idea who raped me. All I remember is getting ready for the party and then waking up in the hospital two nights later, severely dehydrated with a chipped tooth, a chunk of hair missing behind my left ear from where it was ripped out, a positive rape kit, and enough GHB in my system to choke a small equine. I didn’t even know how I got to the hospital, I have no recollection of speaking to the doctors. Someone found me in one of the frat house bathrooms puking my guts out. My eyes were rolling back in my head, I couldn’t walk or stand on my own, I couldn’t talk, I couldn’t even tell them what my name was. Luckily one of my friends in the frat recognized me. He called my roommate (and then best friend) who picked me up and decided I needed an ambulance. It still barely feels real to me tbh, it feels like something I watched happened to me from outside myself. Sometimes I am terrified that one day the full effect of what actually happened during those few days is going to just hit me all at once. Thinking about that makes it hard for me to breathe. 

I didn’t anyone, not even my parents or my sister. The only person who really knew was my roommate and I BEGGED her not to tell anyone. It took less than a week for her to call my then boyfriend and tell him I voluntarily cheated on him. Only then did I tell the full story to someone who wasn’t her or a doctor. I had to move out of our dorm room together, I couldn’t even LOOK at her after she betrayed me like that. 

I spent every weekend of my freshman year after that locked in my new dorm room. I had to get tested for every STD in the book and started getting paranoid that I somehow got pregnant even though I was given a morning after pill. I started getting night terrors. I got pretty brutal anxiety and started getting sick all the time, I could barely keep food down. I came home from my freshman year at under 90 pounds. I had to transfer schools, if I stayed there I was going to loose my gd mind. 

I found a counselor my sophomore year at my new university. I honest to god have no idea what I would have done with out her. She probably saved my life. I was an anxious, angry, basket case, shell of a person. I felt like I was being buried alive. I don’t know how I would have been able to go on living like that. Idk how I would have ended up, but I am eternally grateful that I never had to find out. 

My stomach still drops to my feet every single time someone asks if they can buy me a drink at a bar or get me a drink at a party. I still have trouble making and trusting close friends. I still haven’t told my parents or anyone in my family or most of my closest friends. This is actually probably the first time I have written out the entire story at once. I am honestly glad I have no memory of who raped me, I don’t know how I would be able to deal with that. I don’t know how I could close my eyes knowing what their face looked like. I can’t even imagine what it’s like for people who have to live every day remembering exactly what happened to them. I truly can’t, even the thought is just overwhelming. 

I came out the other side. I survived, I lived, I dealt with it. I still deal with it, it’s part of me now (no matter how fucking much I wish it wasn’t)… I KNOW what it feels like. I know what it feels like to have to deal with trauma and triggers. I know what it feels like to wish you could pour hydrogen peroxide all over your brain until you can forget and it feels clean again. But that trauma, that experience, those triggers, they are MINE. It’s my job to stay away from fiction, tv shows, and fanfiction that have any of the things that trigger me in them. It’s my job to not read fics with drunk non-con, or watch tv shows with non-con elements like Jessica Jones, or go anywhere near documentaries like The Hunting Ground. Its my job to use Tumblr Savior and Blacklist and make sure I take care of myself. I am not going to place that responsibility on anyone else’s shoulders, I would never and could never ask that of anyone. I know that fandom is NOT my safe space, I know that I have to make my own safe space. To expect an entire FANDOM to not only know what triggers me, but to cater specifically to me, I honestly can’t think of anything more unfair and self centered. 

My pain, my trauma, my triggers, they aren’t weapons. They aren’t tools I can use to shame, attack, or put other people down. They don’t give me the right to police anyone else, they don’t give me special privileges. They don’t give me the right to say whatever the fuck I want to anyone about anything. They aren’t a special pass. They don’t make me more important. They are my responsibility, just like my fandom experience. 

Grow up and get over yourself, your life is going to be a whole lot easier when you do. 

#oh and also kindly go fuck yourself #kgreatthanks #rape tw #date rape tw #Anonymous

[allineednow]

Here's your 'Putin Did It!' Survival Guide...

This article first appeared in November 2016 on GR.

As the Duran reported, it was only a matter of time before the ‘Putin Did It’ (see The Duran Lexicon for more) line crept back into the news in light of a re-opened FBI investigation, following the discovery more incriminating Hillary Clinton emails. Sure enough, Howard Dean, the guy who ended his own presidential campaign by acting like a crazed hooligan on stage, has said that now the FBI and Putin are on the same side.

This comes days after Putin reassured the world that he really doesn’t want, need or care to meddle in the US election. Of course the usual suspects from the western mainstream media don’t hear Putin because he’s too damn reasonable. It appears that western mainstream media are confounded by Putin’s calm, his consistency, his logic and moreover from the fact that he doesn’t seem too perturbed about the issues that western pundits go hysterical over on a daily basis.

To be able to make life simpler for those who ‘question more’ in the following week,  I’t come up with a list of the varieties of people who say ‘Putin did it’ and why.

1. THE OLD ANTI-SOVIET COLD WARRIOR WITH IMAGINARY NUKES AT THE READY

This is an group of people who lost their raison d’etre following the Soviet Union's prohibited break-up. Like the members of the CPSU who rallied against the leadership of Gorbachev in 1991, the loss of power equally devastated this wide variety of person. The lack of the USSR meant that they could talk about nuking Moscow in order from Communism; to & lsquo; rsquo & free the people. In an instant they went from being defenders of freedom, to trigger happy weirdos.

But life has recently got a lot better for them. These people go home at night faking the leader of the Communist Party of the Russian Federation isn't  Gennady Zyuganov  however Vladimir Putin. To them the Soviet Union is back and so too is the wonderful crusade against it.

Many of these people couldn’t care less about Hillary Clinton’her crimes against everybody from Bernie Sanders to foreign heads of state and s mails. They’re happy that a mainstream political figure has allowed them to once more feel relevant. The USSR is back, it has to be destroyed by any means necessary and the former Goldwater supporter Hillary Clinton is their type of gal. Put on your cowboy boots…

2. THE PATHOLOGICAL ANTI-RUSSIAN RACIST

This group has roots which date back far beyond America’s ascension as a world power. Unlike the previous group, these people are no laughing matter. Where the anti-Soviet cold warriors have a particular Dr. Strangelove worth to them, one which even in 1960s America wasn’t fully taken seriously, the anti-Russian racists have been spreading vile propaganda in the west for centuries.

To these people, Russians are barbaric by design. They are expendable and their country is fit as they see fit to be used by powers. This mindset reached a fevered pitch during the so-called ‘Great Game’ between Britain and Russia from the mid to late 19th century.

The kind of propaganda held that Russians have no education no culture, no civilisation and most importantly,  that Orthodox Christianity is a poor faith vis-à-vis varieties of Western Christianity. This was said in spite of Orthodoxy’s direct connection.

When Sir Halford John Mackinder suggested that Russia should be used as a region that the west must control in order to better dominate the Orient this mindset was later elevated to the realm of pseudoscience. According to these people, rsquo, Russia wasn &;t even worthy of colonising, it was a motorway that ought in order to get to the final destination to be pacified.

These ideas consequently became highly dangerous under the Nazis and were refined. Hitler sought Lebensraum or living space for the German race. To be able to achieve this, so Hitler could use the land to provide resources for the races, mainly Russians, Slavic populations, had to be eliminated.

Their attitudes have a similar origin, although few of those & lsquo; Putin Did It & rsquo; brigade associate themselves with Hitler. It is a deep set mindset whereby those of western European lineage and those of a Western Christian persuasion believe they're implicitly superior to Russians, black people, Jewish people, Orthodox Christians, Arabs, all Asian people and indigenous peoples of the Americas and Oceania.     Russia is the target because unity and of the power of the Russian state. But do not be fooled.   These folks are old fashioned western racists, they’re just more careful about whom they publicly insult these days.

3. THE BORING, WILFULLY IGNORANT LIBERAL

‘Putin isn’t a liberal therefor he MUST be bad’: so goes the mantra of those who speak about Russia in a negative light and blame them for everything from the local health food store running from inedible garbage to the fact that their loser kids failed a recent maths examination.

For them, Russia has a DUTY to be a state, because that’s the way the world should be. There’s a racist element to this thinking. Because they see Russia as a state of ‘white folks,’ they expect Russia to do as European nations do and adopt the post-identity liberal way where to quote the song Lola by The Kinks ‘Girls will be boys and boys will be girls It’s a mixed up muddled up shook up world’.

They're incensed not by Russia’s alleged lack of democracy but because Russia is democratic and actively decide to do things the Russian way instead of the liberal European way. Of course this doesn’t match the story Putin is currently forcing Russians to have what they need in a way that is totally undemocratic.

In the event you’re looking for don, logic’t attempt a conversation with one of these liberals. These people know nothing about Russia, they cannot think anyone who looks vaguely wouldn’t want to be like liberals that are good. It must be a result of ‘oppression’.

The insincerity of the pseudo-compassion is exposed. Most of these people reckon they are pros that are Putin and can tell you composed stories concerning all you will need to know about Putin from his childhood to & lsquo; rig the election & rsquo;.

Less familiar to such people will be the titles, Alexander Yakovlev, Yegor Gaidar and Anatoly Chubais.   These folks are often wilfully ignorant that western bandits such as George Soros acted in collusion with Russian traitors from the 1990s to stave the Russian folks. When they hear that in the liberal 1990s, young men were committing suicide left and right, the elderly were starving and homeless, young women who would have been scientists, teachers, athletes or musicians were forced into prostitution; they just tend to cover their ears. To them, the precious story is more suitable than the fact of what Russia’s experimentation did to the lives of Russians.

So go on, ignore reality, and don’t choke on your gluten free smoothie. Keep calm and remember lsquo, & the problem;Putin did it’.

4. THE ‘CAN’T HAPPEN HERE’ TRUE BELIEVER

Unlike the groups, I pity these people. These are the people who were brought up to think ‘the west is the best’. In the west the truth is told by the newspapers and in other areas they're full of lies. Western politicians are honourable men and women who go to improve the lives of their countrymen. There is t and everywhere else there isn & rsquo; free speech. In the west, everybody is honest.

WRONG!

These folks are confounded to lean that powers are as bad or worse than the faraway places they’ve are vastly underdeveloped and backward vis-à-vis the west. These people still believe the myth even though the age of Wikileaks, new media such as  The Duran and RT, social media and an inter-connected world, has made such beliefs increasingly difficult to maintain.

For them, the clichés about ‘truth justice and the American (or French, or British, or Swedish or Dutch) way’ must be clung onto because it makes them feel safe in the world and absolves them of any guilt for voting for war criminals and con-artists.

5. HILLARY CLINTON

She does deserve her own category. Seneca said, “Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful”. This quote goes a long way in describing the modus-operandi of Hillary Clinton. She'll say anything to anyone so as to gain some type of advantage that is electoral, economic or general.

I truly think that Hillary Clinton understands that Putin did NOT do it. But she has found a way to simultaneously exploit wicked racists stupid liberals , old Cold Warriors and believers. It was outside her, those of the world and just after Putin and Trump said some vaguely things about one another that Hillary Clinton started blaming Putin for every one of her own ills.

This demonstrates that the ‘Putin did it’ line is a child of opportunism rather than ideology. Had Trump and China's leaders said vaguely things about each other ‘China did it’ might have easily been her mantra.

However, Donald Trump was underestimated by Hillary Clinton. To quote George W. Bush, perhaps she even ‘misunderestimated’ Trump. Where many less independent minded leaders would have buckled under pressure and eventually said, ‘yes Putin is bad, sorry Mrs. Hillary you can spank me now’, Trump stuck to his principles and he should be lauded for it.

Trump has consistently said that although he doesn’t have a relationship with Putin he would like a good one because, collaboration between superpowers is far better than conflict, because a common policy on ISIS is much far better than a hypocritical and confused one and because Putin is a man who inherently controls respect, something which Donald Trump finds rightly admirable.

The moral of the story is, Hillary Clinton can fool a lot of the people a lot of the time but she cannot fool everybody all of the time. Donald Trump’s has made this especially so.

So there you have it. Your ‘Putin Did It’ survival manual. I have a feeling that over the next week it will be useful.

The original source of this article is The Duran

Copyright ©Adam Garrie, The Duran, 2017

[therealkesslergang-blog]

About us

the infamous Kessler Gang of self proclaimed group of family Gypsies out of Springfield Missouri.Their hustle is to con people into believing they will help you then steal your ID so you are trapped. Then they steal everything you own. Jewel Kessler also goes by the following names Jewel Levin,(this was supposed to be her married name to one Josh Levin, an attorney for General Motors where they lived in Trump Tower and had a child together. To this date we have found no Josh Levin ever employed as an attorney for GM nor a resident by said name at Trump Tower), Vale Stevens, Vale Riverson, (Vale/Val Being short for Valerie or Valentina) and April Hart. She uses several cell phones so there is an account for each name. In addition she will use each identity to tag team commentary in social media to make someone look bad or crazy. Her MO is to get you to trust her by paying your cell phone or another critical bill. When she does this she has you put your phone number on one of her accounts so she can control your number. If you upset her she shuts your number off. Thus creating a situation of you being incommunicado.

he also garnishes sympathy by faking medical ailments. I have personally witnessed her consuming the herbal supplement 'Black Cohosh' a negative side effect is that it causes vaginal bleeding when used improperly. She has a deep understanding of herbs and knows how to use them safely to get the desired result. She also manipulates doctors into providing her health information. 

Her accomplices are James Kessler AKA 'Elvis' makes many claims one of which he had a Vegas Lounge act. This is false as my Nevada connections tell me his act was so weak they wouldn't let perform on the street corner. There two other members of this gang Vernon Hedstrom and Carol Jean Dawson. They are supporting members and play their parts well.. Vernon has a serious growth under his right eye. There is a 25 year difference between Jewell and James. The supporting cast play their parts well, so if you get upset with the psychotic behavior of "Uncle" James she, Jewell,  screams "elder abuse". This gang has properties in the Springfield area. They currently 'rent' to people they know they can take advantage of.Jewel and Vernon may still manage an Apartment complex in Branson, Oak Knoll Apartments.

[seidipaddlaw-blog]

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[literateape]

Diversifying Your Identity Portfolio to Become a Real Live Person

By Don Hall

One of the new storytelling experiments I—and when I say "I," I mean Christen Thomas of GMan Tavern, David Himmel of Literate Ape, Joe Shanahan of the Metro, my wife, multiple storytellers and a bunch of audience members as well as the kickass staff at GMan Tavern, but that takes too long so we'll go with the narcissistic pronoun, K?—am embarking upon is Identity Flip.

Started as a joke between Scott Whitehair and myself as we brainstormed shows we'd never do, the idea of identity and how essential or unimportant it all is niggled into my brainpan until the show blossomed up from the bad idea to a truly interesting and thought-provoking experience.

We've done four of them to date and each one has opened up concepts that were anticipated and have surprised me, in the way all good experiments should I think. Watching straight white men and straight black women switch their personal narratives for about eight minutes a pop reveals how different our life experiences can be but also how incredibly similar our base reactions to the things life throws at us are. Boomers and Millennials flipping was hilarious and moving in turn.

More than anything, the performances have confirmed for me that identity is a choice we make based on a host of factors.  

Speaking with a young black woman last week after the show, she told me how she was black but raised by a white couple and that this confused things for her as she moved to Chicago. This conversation was inspired by Mari DeOleo's story of feeling she was white in the Dominican Republic but was black in Chicago as read by the very white male Sean Keen.  

One of the surprises for me has been that, in curating the evening, I'm very conscious of presenting as much a fully Chicago face on the stage as possible. But each white male I've put onstage has been so different in how he wears that identity. Each black woman I've asked to perform has been so completely unique in how they own both their blackness and their womanhood. Having these stories told by other people instantly opens up the lens of identity and lays bare the crazy contradictions and importance of these labels.

Identity is that which we find our own self worth.  It is the moniker we decide is most representative of our essential I—being professionally successful, being highly educated, making a lot of money, being an excellent parent, being pious and faithful in a chosen religion, being socially and/or sexually popular and desired, being physically attractive or beautiful. It includes areas that we have no control over but decide to embrace—our skin color, our gender, our sexual preferences, our physicality.

Race and gender and physicality are born-in traits but the choice is not to erase them but to either embrace the stereotypes laid upon skin color, sexuality and disability or buck those stereotypes. Culture, hair style, language—the trappings of the outward display of identity - are all conscious choices.

What you choose indicates what you value in life Jeff grew up without. Without money, without the things money could buy, without a sense of security that a bit more cash in hand would provide. He came to value the earning of money as a priority and built his identity around being a breadwinner. He invested in his portfolio, worked 100 hours a week, no amount could ever be enough. He wore the clothes most associated with wealth and power. When Jeff lost his job in an economic downturn, Jeff's very identity came into question and his sense of loss and confusion spun him into a deep depression.

Jeff chose to value money over everything else and when it dried up, he was as a man without a country, a ship without a sail. As the money dried up, so did his self worth.

For much of the last decade-and-a-half, I wrapped my identity up in the Angry White Guy thing (a satirical comment on the stereotype of the NASCAR loving, flag waving, trucker hat wearing rubes I grew up around). It was a badge I wore, an identity I strove to project. Sure, I'm frequently pretty angry ("That's the secret," replied Banner. "I'm always angry.") but those who know me intimately were privy to other facets of the fundamental me that I chose to keep discretely under the uniform.

Around the point that it became obvious that Trump was a possible furreal candidate and the White Nationalist started coming out of the woodwork and from under the fetid rocks they'd been hiding under, I suddenly found myself questioning both the humor of this identity as well as what it was doing for me in life.

The black nerd who goes to Comic Con and dresses up like a superhero. The young woman wholly soaked in the semi-misandry of fifth wave feminism who loves no one more than her Republican father. The middle-aged man who becomes a body builder and has the body of a twenty-five year old and the head of Clint Eastwood's leathery ball sack who collects Hummel figurines. The Suicide Girl who is also a Child Psychologist. The Undocumented Immigrant who runs for public office. The Frat Bro who works at the animal shelter. The Social Justice Warrior who loves Judy Blume books. The Poet who won't miss a Michael Bay film. The Rock Drummer who has five cats. The Sensitive Writer who loves crap TV. The Hipster Guy with a Beard that looks like the brillo-like asshole of a Grizzly Bear who is a surgeon.  

Underneath each of these identities is more. More person. More depth. More complexity.

One side of the conversation will tell you that identity politics is a bane on society. The other side will tell you it is about fucking time. Like all things, the Truth is somewhere in between as each of us is not one thing or the other. In the fight against the binary nature of our snake brains, the diversification of our identities is the road to presenting ourselves as genuine people rather than cartoon cut-outs of the stereotypes so easily digested.

I'm grateful for the opportunity for this experiment in storytelling. As I tell the audience each time, the worst thing that can happen is that they will enjoy an hour of great stories. The best thing that can occur is an hour of great stories followed by dialogue over beer about these very ideas.

#culture of identities #Identity Politics #Identity Flip #storytelling

[topinforma]

New Post has been published on Mortgage News

New Post has been published on http://bit.ly/2kLcePB

Investors are worried about Wall Street rollbacks by Trump

President Trump last week signed a “presidential memorandum to delay the Labor Department’s rules that require financial professionals to put their clients’ interests ahead of their own.” (John Locher/AP Photo)

Well, it’s done.

President Trump issued an executive order that could weaken consumer protections for your retirement funds.

Last week, Trump signed a “presidential memorandum to delay the Labor Department’s rules that would require financial professionals to put their clients’ interests ahead of their own,” The Post’s Renae Merle wrote. “The ‘fiduciary rule,’ scheduled to go into effect in April, has long been a target of Republicans, including close Trump Wall Street ally Anthony Scaramucci, who call it burdensome and costly.”

The new regulation, as The Post’s Jonnelle Marte reported last week, “is intended to cut down on conflicts of interest in investing advice, such as when a broker may be paid by a third party for recommending a particular product.”

Folks, whether you fan or foe of Trump, his actions will shape the retirement landscape. So it’s important you ask questions. Stay informed.

Because, behind all the politics, there are people who are just trying to figure out how to save enough money for retirement or avoid being taken advantage of by unscrupulous financial professionals or outright con artists.

So beginning this week, and every Monday, this newsletter will focus on all things retirement related.

On the first Thursday of every month, I’ll host a live chat where the topic will retirement. And I’ve recruited a team of experts to help answer your questions. The next retirement chat will be chat will be Thursday, March 2, at noon (ET).

In this newsletter, I’ll recap retirement questions that readers submitted during my live chat or post answers to questions they asked that the expert didn’t have a chance to respond to during the scheduled discussions.

Last week, for the first retirement chat, my guest was Carolyn McClanahan, a physician turned financial planner. Here’s a look of some of the conversation. (Some questions and answers have been edited for clarity.)

I think President Trump is going to be ruinous to the U.S. economy, but I’m not trying to make this political. My question is how do I invest my 401(k) in view of the gloomy future that I envision. I don’t believe the current stock run-up will be sustained. Obviously, I have no more prognostication powers than the next person, so I can’t just give up on the U.S. stock market either. Are government bonds a good idea if we end up in a constitutional crisis? Go into cash? Go international? Would retirement date funds be any more immune than other investments? I see bad things coming, but don’t know enough to protect my investments. The answer is certainly a combination of the above; where should the balance be?

McClanahan: It is very important to be diversified because you cannot predict the future. If you are risk averse you would want more assets in bonds, but still need to have some assets dedicated to stocks, including international funds. There are multiple bond classes, and you should diversify into all of these including corporate and international bonds.

Do you expect a major recession with the instability at the White House?

McClanahan: I have learned that predictions are worthless. Given that, the stock market is currently very richly valued however, it has been higher in the past. We recommend that people understand how much risk they can take financially and psychologically and adjust their portfolio accordingly. It is important to stay diversified, so even if your portfolio is conservatively bent, you should always have assets allocated to domestic and international stocks. Likewise, money allocated to bonds should be diversified in domestic and international bonds. Consult an hourly fee only planner to help you determine the right allocation for you, then you can take it from there.

How do I find a financial planner? I have gone to my bank and Google and have been disappointed. Is there a magic answer?

McClanahan: Look at Garrett Planning Network — hourly planners or napfa.org — fee-only fiduciaries.

As a federal retiree with a pension, I find recent stories regarding insolvent pension funds and resulting reductions in retiree pensions scary. Do you think pensions of current federal retirees could be in jeopardy?

McClanahan: I never try to predict the future. If our country (including politicians) understood modern monetary theory and basic macroeconomics, they would quit using minutes to worry over balancing the budget and would focus more on cutting waste and inefficiency.

Given that, it is important that you understand how much of your spending is discretionary versus needed so if they ever do cut benefits, you can make the appropriate changes in spending. And I would also call your lawmaker incessantly to let them know that cutting current benefits is a bad move.

Is there a formula to figure out how much money you will need for retirement? And provide for inflation? Not that this would be a firm figure, but just something that would provide a “ballpark figure” to work off of?

McClanahan: There are many ‘rules of thumb’ but how much you need depends on multiple factors: When you plan to quit work, your health and how much you spend on necessary versus discretionary spending. One rule of thumb is the 4 percent rule — you can pull out 4 percent a year plus inflation and not run out of money for 30 years. However, this may not hold in a low interest rate environment, so you must be careful. For example, if you need $40,000 a year after your Social Security, you should have $1 million set aside. Big numbers but another reason people who are healthy should work as long as possible in a job they love.

We are helping my mother-in-law, who has health problems that unfortunately include some cognition issues. They are manageable at this point. Since taking over her finances (and going after some nasty fraud that she fell for), we found out that she has short-term care insurance, life insurance, but not long-term care insurance. When we’ve spoken to her about this, it’s ended badly. Basically, she says that if she has to stay in some sort of “old people home” for more than 100 days, she’d rather die. So it’s a waste of money. Right now, she lives independently with some long-distance help from us. But I don’t think this is likely to last given her issues. She can afford additional hired help to come to her home, if she’s willing to accept it, but unless something big happens I think she is eventually looking at assisted living. I am afraid that will bankrupt her and make her a ward of the state, so we’ve been pushing for her to get long term care insurance. Do you think long term care insurance is worth it and why?

McClanahan: She would probably not qualify for LTC insurance at this point. Thankfully, she will also not become ‘a ward of the state.’ What will happen first is you will spend down her assets on her care, then she will qualify for Medicaid to cover her long term care needs. Make sure you speak to an elder care attorney to help you plan appropriately. Also, make sure she has updated advance directives that share her quality-of-life choices. Sometimes we push people into things they don’t want, and it ends up making them miserable and can be very costly.

My husband and I have a 14-year age difference, which has always provided some planning challenges as well as benefits (like the fact that my accounts will have that much longer to grow before we can use the money in my 60s). We currently live on less than $40,000 a year when you take out stuff like mortgage and day care expenses — both of which we do not plan to have in retirement. We have Social Security and a small federal pension. The 4 percent rule from 401(k) should provide $80,000 to $100,000 a year from his accounts alone. This seems like SO much money compared to what we are used to right now! But I am worried about health-care expenses (and I’m in my 30s. Can you tell I’m a worrier?). We are both blessed with excellent health, which we maintain by eating organic and living an active lifestyle. But I don’t have a crystal ball. Is there a new number we are supposed to shoot for to ‘self-insure’ rather than purchase LTC insurance? I thought if you had $3 million at retirement you didn’t need the LTCI. Also, I am planning to retire when he does, so in my late 40s, barring catastrophic change to this plan such as one of us or a child becoming sick, disabled, etc. Do I need LTCI or should I be saving to self-insure?

McClanahan: This answer depends on your health, your choice for where you want to grow old (in a home or retirement facility) and your support systems. Long-term care insurance is in flux right now and given your young age, it might not be a good deal. Consider talking with an hourly fee only planner to see if you have enough to self insure

I have read most of the articles about pensions reducing benefits. I generally support the reduction, because it will increase the chance that these funds last for the people who are expecting a benefit from them, and for the people currently working to provide the benefit. Reducing benefits because of poor planning and other decisions that the Baby Boomers made is going to become normal in very short order (think Social Security, too). I think that the Boomers, responsible for the decisions that led to this situation, should bear the cost, but that doesn’t seem to be the sentiment of most. What do you think?

McClanahan: Retirement was ‘invented’ in the 1930s with the advent of Social Security. They picked age 65 back then and the average age people lived to if they lived to be 65 was 72. So people only spent about seven years in retirement. Now, people easily live 30 years past 65. We need to change how we spend our last years — people who stay financially engaged in some form of work are healthier, happier and more financially secure. This will protect them against policies such as reductions in benefits.

The Color of Money retirement coaches You’ve got questions. I’ve got some people who are here to help. Here are the bios of some of the experts who will be my guests for the live discussions. Next week, I’ll introduce more coaches.

Louis Barajas, is a certified financial planner and runs the California-based Wealth Management LAB, a fee-only wealth management firm. He works with clients from all income levels. He has a passion to help people understand investing and money management.

Kate Holmes is certified financial planner and the founder and chief executive of Belmore Financial, a location-independent financial planning practice. Kate works with young professionals in their 20s to 40s “who are ready to challenge the status quo and go after their happiest life.”

Michael Edesess, an economist and mathematician, who is chief strategist of Compendium Finance. He is a research associate of the EDHEC-Risk Institute. He is one of the coauthors of “The 3 Simple Rules of Investing: Why Everything You’ve Heard about Investing Is Wrong ― and What to Do Instead” and author of “The Big Investment Lie.”

Carolyn McClanahan, a physician turned certified financial planner. McClanahan, who founded the fee-only Life Planning Partners, based in Jacksonville, Fla., concentrates on how health intersects with personal finance, including long-term-care issues.

Lanta Evans-Motte, a Maryland-based financial advisor with Raymond James Financial Services, She has a MBA and is a licensed insurance agent, and Registered Financial Consultant RFC. She earned a Certificate in Personal Financial Planning and is a Retirement Income Certified Professional (RICP). She serves as vice president of the Literacy Institute for Financial Enrichment (LIFE), a non-profit organization she helped to co-found.

Barbara Roper, director of investor protection for the Consumer Federation of America, which is an alliance of nearly 300 national, state and local pro-consumer organizations. Roper has conducted studies of abuses in the financial planning industry, state oversight of investment advisers, state and federal financial planning regulation,

Jean Setzfand is a senior vice president of AARP Programs that produce interactive educational programming designed to address health, wealth and personal enrichment concerns for consumers 50 and over. Setzfand also serves on the Securities and Exchange Commission’s Investor Advisory Committee and the Advisory Committee on Seniors for the North American Securities Administrators Association (NASAA).

Retirement Rants & Raves I’d like to introduce a feature that will allow you to rant and rave about any retirement issue. For example, tell me what bothers you the most about saving for retirement. If you’re retired, what do you wish you could have told your younger self?

Or, what’s the best thing about being retired? I’m really looking forward to a time when my time is my own.

How about this: What’s your opinion on the announcement this week that the President Trump plans to rollback Wall Street reforms?

Send your retirement rants and raves to [email protected]. Please include your name, city and state. In the subject line put “Retirement Rants & Raves.”

Newsletter comments policy Please note it is my personal policy to identity readers who respond to questions I ask in my newsletters. When people have to include their real name, I find it encourages thoughtful and civil conversation. I want my newsletters to be a safe place to express your opinion. And all opinions are welcome even if you disagree with me. Let’s talk but keep the conversation respectful.

On sensitive matters or upon request, I’m happy to include a first name and last initial. But I prefer not to post anonymous comments. (I do make exceptions when I’m asking questions that might reveal sensitive information that may cause discord in a family or marriage.)

Live chat this week Join me every Thursday at noon (ET) for a live about personal finance. You pick the topic and I’ll try my best to help you with your financial issue. Or just join the discussion to talk about your money triumphs. I call it “Testimony Thursday.” It’s your chance to brag – and you should – if you’ve paid off debt, saved like never before or just beat back some financial crisis.

To participate in the chat click this link.

Readers may write to Michelle Singletary at The Washington Post, 1301 K St. NW, Washington, D.C. 20071, or [email protected]. Personal responses may not be possible, and comments or questions may be used in a future column, with the writer’s name, unless otherwise requested. To read previous Color of Money columns, go to washingtonpost.com/business.

[thelovecafe]

"I started dating this girl last semester and I really like her. We get along great, she is very supportive, she's intelligent, and she makes me laugh which is a bonus. The thing is we have different political views on some issues happening in the world right now and can get into heated debates. I often walk away feeling like she doesn't understand the reality of social justice needs in this country and consider removing her from my life. Are political views worth ending things over or are there better ways that we can work things out?"

Hi there!

I'm glad to hear you found an amazing girl! Meeting someone supportive, intelligent, and with a similar sense of humor is always a great thing. Because last year was an election year, this country saw people with a wide range of political views fiercely debating a number of topics, including social justice. No matter the topic and no matter the relationship you have with the other person, I think the most important thing you can do is to be empathetic. Your girlfriend may hold her political views because of her parents' and grandparents' views, her religious views, her past experiences, gender, sexual orientation, etc. There's hundreds of possible reasons for why she might hold political views that differ from your own. I can confidently state that if she likes you as much as you like her, she doesn't hold those views just for the sake of arguing with you. I believe that while it may be hard, you should always respect what a person has been through and think about why they feel a certain way. Try that next time you get into a heated discussion with her. As the relationship goes on and you learn more about it, empathizing will definitely get easier. If you find that in a couple of months (or years) you two are simply too different, then maybe call it off then. But for now, I'd stick it out a little while instead of rushing into a break-up. Good luck!

Simran 

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This is my personal opinion and I stand by it firmly with respect to how I live my life, but that doesn’t mean that it’s right for your life specifically. If someone is in line with the opinions of Donald Trump, and if those political views contradict who you are as a person and how you live your life based on your life experiences and your background, I think it’s totally valid to end that relationship. I think in this specific political climate, the issues that are being talked about aren’t the kind that can be ignored or brushed off as a slight disagreement. The issues coming into play recently are crucial to the livelihood and survival of people all over the country. I do feel that letting issues like this exist in a relationship can breed toxicity if left unaddressed, so either try opening up a dialogue where you two can express how you feel about your differing ideologies, or take the space you need from this individual.  It’s definitely better to take some form of communicative action than to let your issues with this person’s beliefs manifest in other ways that can be not as productive.

Justin

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There are tons of couples where both people have opposing views, so you definitely can make it work if you want it enough, through empathizing with each other's positions, using humor, making sure your debates are free of name-calling or personal attacks, or just avoiding controversial topics all together.    If her views make you feel unsafe, and/or you find them so abhorrent that you lose respect for her, then you definitely should consider calling it quits. Relationships are based on mutual respect, and if she holds views that disrespects your identities and/or you lose respect for her based on her opinions, it's not healthy. Vini

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Hello! 

Arguments and small debate are bound to happen in any type of relationship. You might not agree with her political views and she might not either. However, you can weigh out the pros and cons in this relationship. Is it doing you more good than harm? Is it causing you stress? For a relationship to work and last, you must be happy, too! I would suggest to try talking things out and see what her opinion is before making any hasty decisions. Like you said, especially with all of the current events taking place now, these debates might be placed in the spotlight. Can you two put aside your differences and still work well together as a couple? Every relationship is different, and the way you and this girl interact with each other will be as well. If the conversations are civil and respectful, I would think about how content and comfortable you are being in the relationship. If you are constantly overthinking about it and stressing out, then I would suggest reconsidering what you would like to see her as--whether it be a friend or someone more than that. Removing her from your life is an option, but in my opinion, is leaning towards the extreme side of handling with this situation. It is also helpful to view this situation in the perspective that as humans, we have developed and learned to think uniquely many ways. Differences of political views, preferences, religion, etc., will always arise, but it boils down to whether or not these differences are negatively affecting you. Perhaps, if dating doesn't work out, then stay friends? Definitely communicate with your partner so you both can find the best solution to this problem. Good-luck!

Best, Angela

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