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#i was SO HAPPY with the songs i happened to get here like WE BUILT THIS CITY
alienwithaguitar · 1 month
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Does anyone else think this Wilbur thing has been blown way out of proportion? First of all, I am in FULL support of Shelby and am not defending Wilbur. As a victim myself, I sympathize with her story, and I will never discredit her experiences. But this community is going to extremes that make me so fucking uncomfortable.
What people forget is that Wilbur has a record label. He CAN'T say whatever he wants. There’s a reason he made a statement not an apology, why Lovejoy hasn’t said anything, why he never mentioned Shelby by name, why he didn’t apologize- because making promises can get you in legal trouble. One of the first things you learn about car accidents is to not apologize, even if it's your fault, because that will be used against you in court. Admissions can even get you in trouble for things you didn’t do, if the other party decides to push for that. He’s almost certainly not allowed to apologize because his record label can't risk the legal trouble. We can excuse Quackity for making poor statements for the same reason, so why can't we keep that energy here?
Wilbur has always been an unstable man. As a long time fan and someone who heavily relates to YCGMA’s themes of being awful and feeling like you’ll never get better, he struggles with a lot of mental problems. His persona has been built around manic, destructive tendencies and that’s something that’s been a part of his brand for YEARS. He's brought up drugs and alcohol use in the past, and one of his closest friends recently passed away, which certainly only added to things. Mental health isn't an excuse, but it is a REASON. (Listen to Mammalian Sighing Reflex and tell me it doesn’t resemble compilations of artists deteriorating as they lose their sanity)
I don’t understand how anyone can actively want him to kill himself. Or wish that he gets worse. You can’t claim to be an advocate for mental health and helping victims if you don’t want EVERYONE involved getting serious help. Wilbur needs therapy, he needs to atone if either of them want to heal. Nobody has to forgive him, or welcome him back into their life, but he absolutely deserves the chance to fix himself to ensure this doesn’t happen AGAIN. 
If you can seriously say that you want him to get worse, and you don’t care about his mental health, then you DON'T care about victims. Leaving a destructive man to rot alone WILL lead to repeat events in the future. As someone with multiple diagnoses for debilitating mental illnesses, when I was at my lowest, I hurt myself. I hurt other people. Mental illness isn’t cute shit you put in your bio. It's terrifying, isolating, exhausting. And if I wasn’t given a chance at therapy and healing, I could have continued hurting people for the rest of my life.
These tweets just confirm none of you actually care about mentally ill people, it's all situational and performative. This is the most clear cry for help I've seen and you're feeding into it. Most of you will never understand what debilitating mental illness is like, how easy it is to hurt people you care about. You can hate him, be pissed, wish he never did it, deplatform him, I AM TOO! But nobody involved would be happy if he killed himself. These are real people, not characters in a soap drama. Actively wishing for him to kill himself is disgusting. If you care at all about Shelby getting closure, Wilbur needs to understand what he did wrong and fix it, so she can move on.
Also the lying I’ve seen is so stupid. The spotify stuff is fake. Anyone who’s a casual fan of Wilbur has known for a long time that’s not his spotify account. It’s a fan account that posts unofficial versions of his songs. So easily debunked and yet people still hold it against him??
Again, I'm in FULL support of Shelby. I fully condemn his actions, and as a victim I'm so proud of her for speaking up. But at the end of the day, we’re people. I'm glad many of you have never had the kind of debilitating downward spiral that leads to you hurting yourself and others, but if you think that makes it okay to wish an unstable man takes his life, then you can’t say you’re a mental health advocate. Take care of yourselves, please think twice about your own morals if you're sitting around hoping fans and creators commit suicide.
If you are one of the people actively waiting for him to kill himself, I pray that you never find yourself hurting others at your lowest, and I pray that people show you the kindness you didn't give to him.
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angelltheninth · 9 months
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Band Member Bakugo Corners You in the Back Alley
Pairing: Band member!Bakugo Katsuki x Fem!Reader
Tags: very suggestive, teasing, post performance, chance meeting, kissing (forced), being searched, groping, mention of cnc, Reader being pinned, dom!Bakugo
A/N: Boy bands are hot okay? They just are, its like, a law of the universe or something.
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Honestly you don't even know why you followed the band's lead singer, maybe because you wanted to make your friend happy, maybe because you caught him smirking at you while he sang, maybe it was because of all the rumors you heard about him, but you snuck to the back
Bakugo knew he was being followed by someone, a real cutie too, just his luck
"Hey! Brat! What's the big idea huh? You sneaking back here, following me. You want an autograph or some shit? I come back here to unwind after a performance, not be followed by a crazy fan." His voice was just as booming and loud as it was during the song, if not louder because he was getting right in your face right now
It did look a little weird, you imagine he's had many girls follow him like this but you weren't one of them, you weren't even a fan of his, "Not a fan? You here with a friend then? Haha, and you ditched them to follow the bad band boy. What's the matter? Wanted to see if the rumors are true?" He walked up to you, backing you up against the cold wall of the alley
With him being this close you could see how well built he was, all those muscles on display now that his jacket was off, his abs clearly outlined under the black tank top
"Now that I have a real good look at you, yeah, you look like my type. Wanna be my next conquest babygirl? Not here though, despite what you heard I don't fuck my fans behind the stage, I have some class. Although by the way you're looking right now I'm guessing you're exactly the kind of girl that would love to be taken quick and rough." One of his hand trailed up your thigh, making you shiver under his rough, practiced fingers
The slap you have him was unexpected, for both of you, echoing though the alley
"Ah. You've got some guts after all. Guess you're not a complete pushover." Bakugo's hand is back on your thigh like nothing happened, his face leaning in close to yours
Instead of a moan you find your mouth covered with his, and even more surprising is the way your body reacts, legs shaking, thighs clamping shut, trapping his hand in between them
"Yeah, don't let me. Fight me. Squirm, come on, tell me to stop." He feels you go stiff as a board under him, an actual scared sob falling from your mouth this time, "Hey, hey, I'm not a psychopath you know. Ever heard of cnc? That's the kinda shit I'm into sweetheart. Come on, if you don't wanna play, tell me your safeword."
Any word would have done the trick but instead you moaned his name, "Good girl. I knew you wanted it. I've done this so many times, I know a bottom slut when I see one. Hands up and legs apart for me babygirl, I need to make sure you're not recording this."
You were starting to think that maybe Bakugo has some kind of magic voice because you were ready to do anything he said if only he kept looking at you like this, "Such an obedient little thing." You moaned in appreciation when his hands roamed your body, from your thighs, up your skirt, then palming at your hips and up to your breasts, thumbs rolling over the stiff peaks, "No bra? You really did want to get fucked in the back alley like a slut." No, you just used the excuse that it was very hot today, which it was
Sadly before Bakugo could see if you were hiding anything underneath he heard the other band stop playing, which meant his break was close to over, which meant he had t stop
"Looks like this is all we have time for babygirl. But my friends and I are staying at the hotel two blocks away. If you wanna see where this goes, feel free to find me after the concert. And... bring a camera this time." As he pushes away he steals another kiss, his tongue forcing moan after moan from you before he leaves you there to catch your breath, his time on stage calling
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beautifulpersonpeach · 7 months
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I'm still here ngl..
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Listen, I see this and feel so much happiness. Jimin dancing, showing who he is, showing the versatility of his style and giving us just a glimpse into the extensive, vast range of his talent.
There's been some revisionism happening regarding BTS that's ratcheted up in the last three years or so. I can't be the only person who's noticed it. People more forcefully asserting things about the members that are just plain absurd, like saying this or that member isn't that talented, or that xyz member has this massive character failing that's only just apparent now for some reason, or that things they've said and done aren't actually the case. After FACE, I noticed people saying shit like Jimin can't sing and can't dance...
That reminds me, I went to a cup-sleeve event in June for another group and someone told me to my face Jimin can't dance and I almost uppercut that bitch. It ticked me off but I didn't actually assault her. What I did instead was ask her to explain what she meant, told her I disagreed, and showed her why by playing Jimin's Black Swan solo DP. She took back her initial claim and said she'd just been in a k-pop group online and all those people were saying is how none of the BTS members are that talented especially Jimin who apparently can't sing to save his life and whatever dancing he can do is limited to a few moves from 6 years ago.
Plain insanity.
Jimin, out of the kindness of his sweet, magnanimous heart, is giving the amnesia patients a crash course in who he is. He's reminding people he is Park Jimin of BTS. The dancer who joined a nearly bankrupt agency, had the shortest training period in that agency's history, and with the least resources, and debuted as the main dancer and lead singer of what is now the biggest group in the world. The man who critics from all over the world laud as a virtuoso, in voice, dance, and performance. His voice has brought men to their knees, calmed babies, enchanted concert halls, made stadiums full of people cry out in pure joy. There's nobody alive or dead like Park Jimin, and the fact we all get to exist in the same time as him is a blessing too many people (for my liking) take for granted.
ThisIsJimin is a gift I'm thankful to Jimin for giving us again.
*
Anyway, I was watching that clip again with a friend and she pointed out how cool the dance practice room was. Noted how it's a massive improvement from the old BigHit halls that had mold growing on the walls and water dripping on live wires in the back. It's taken years, hard work by the members, good business sense from BigHit/HYBE, and a lot of my own hard-earned money as well as the resources (time, money, otherwise) from ARMYs over the years to get to this point - and I just want to say, speaking for myself, even though I still see massive room for improvement, I feel very happy with the state of things.
HYBE is cultivating a solid roster of talent built on BTS's hard work. The world-class facilities in the building is the first good sign, as well as the talent now being fostered there. I love the quality of the army of dancers Jimin had access to for his SMF Pt2 performances, I love that NewJeans is doing so well that Riot Games sought them to feature on their new World's anthem, I love that a whole new generation of incredible groups are growing in the environment created by BTS's own trials and success.
BOYNEXTDOOR is a group that continues to have my attention because all six boys are just that good. They posted their dance practice for Crying today (my favourite song from a rookie group in 2023), and I noticed they did it in a similar dark coloured dance practice room Jimin filmed his #ThisIsJimin choreo in. And that really just put a very silly smile on my face for a reason I can't pinpoint yet.
youtube
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Maybe it's aftereffects from the Jimin Effect after streaming his reel as hard as I'm streaming Indigo lately.
I see the asks you send, about Golden, JK in general, jokers, this or that thing happening in fandom, and I'll get to them at some point but I don't want to talk about them right now. Because I'm still stuck on Jimin showcasing himself in that air conditioned, world class dance practice room that's only possible because of his hard work, tenacity, talent, and love for his group.
I'm still stuck on Jimin and legit cannot move on. He's such a beast. Such a calculating, proud, stubborn, and kind beast of a man.
I'm not sure what's going on with me.
We're in Jimtober so maybe his juju is just extra strong and I can't escape his grip no matter what I try. Anyway, it's a good idea to stream FACE, allow yourself to re-experience his album, check out his other solos as well (played Christmas Love over the weekend and realized it sounds even better on low frequency speakers), and eat a lot of spicy food followed by warm/hot drinks because Jimin is curious about such things (and it really does work).
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allwaswell16 · 4 months
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A fic rec of One Direction songfics where a character hears a song written by another character as requested in this ask. If you enjoy the fics, please leave the writers kudos and comments! You can find my other fic recs here. Happy reading!
— Louis/Harry —
🎼 You Drive Me Round The Bend by TheCellarDoor / @donotdialnine
(M, 77k, hate to love) In which Louis is a spoilt rich kid who’s always on the phone while he drives and Harry is a struggling musician making his way down the mountain. It’s just a matter of time before they crash and burn.
🎼 These Sparks We Light by QuickedWeen / @becomeawendybird
(M, 62k, Johnnyswim au) When Louis' eyes catch on a beautiful man across a crowded room at The Script concert, he becomes instantly infatuated and announces he wants to marry a guy like that.
🎼 Far Away. by dimpled_halo / @comebackassholes
(M, 56k, exes) Harry returns to London after five years. Stuck in the past with "what ifs" and "what might have beens", he sees that his friends and ex (and possible love of his life) Louis have all moved on with their lives while he finds himself questioning his own life choices, past and present.
🎼 Home To You by Crowsonthewire / @crows-onthewire
(E, 54k, childhood friends) At fifteen, Harry wrote his first song for an oblivious seventeen year old Louis Tomlinson. Ten years later he’s a singer/songwriter who cant find any words for his second album and Louis is a closeted actor tired of LA.
🎼 It Happened like a Firefly's Light by LHStylinson / @lhstylinson9193
(G, 47k, famous/not famous) Harry Styles. It was a name everyone knew, a person the public loved. But he had one impossible task. Write and record his third album in a month. This is where Louis Tomlinson comes in.
🎼 Looking Through You by @allwaswell16
(E, 41k, friends to lovers) As Harry tries to make sense of his feelings for Louis, he begins writing his next album to express them as it may be the only way to break through the walls that Louis has built between them.
🎼 all that remains by whimperinglou / @acciohl
(E, 40k, canon) Harry has always written too many songs about him.
🎼 Without you it's a season I ain't needing by @perfectdagger
(M, 38k, break up) A long distance relationship au in which Harry is away for a year and Louis is left to pick up the pieces.
🎼 Bitter Ends Turn Sweet by @allwaswell16
(E, 30k, kidfic) It had been four years since Harry first heard the song his ex wrote about him and far longer since they broke up. He forgave Louis long ago, and now his life was focused on his career, his family, and especially his son, Max. 
🎼 Ever since New York by selfwrittenstars
(E, 30k, canon) The one where Harry writes a song about Louis and he finds out.
🎼 Fall At My Door by @kingsofeverything
(E, 29k, famous/famous) A-list actor Harry Styles and award-winning musician Louis Tomlinson have an acquaintances-with-benefits relationship, so whenever their busy professional lives happen to land them in the same city, they meet up. 
🎼 Better Walk That (Pap) Walk, Baby by @fallinglikethis , @lululawrence
(NR, 25k, exes) the one where, after years filled with the anger and pain that accompany a bad breakup, Harry and Louis have to try to put it all behind them, at least for the cameras.
🎼 Baby, You Were the Love of My Life by therogueskimo / @bravetemptation
(NR, 24k, canon) Harry needs a place to record one more song for the album, and London has him too in his head. He asks Liam if he can use his country house and set up a studio in his front room, and Liam agrees.
🎼 With These Arms Folded by @taggiecb
(NR, 21k, famous Louis) Harry Styles is living a peaceful existence in California as a very successful song writer. He has his lake house, and his cat, and his small town existence.
🎼 My English Love Affair by @isthatyoularry
(E, 19k, famous/not famous) The one where Harry writes a song about his English love affair and Louis sleeps with someone in White Eskimo and all he gets is a stupid song written about him.
🎼 Naked & Proud by kiwikero / @icanhazzalou
(E, 18k, famous/not famous) In which Harry runs an organic store, not a nudist colony, and Louis doesn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed.
🎼 Don't You Remember? by @reminiscingintherain
(M, 12k, breakup) Harry slammed the door behind him and immediately pressed his face into his hands, before dropping them back to his sides and staring blankly at the wall. Louis had gone.
🎼 To Make Your Heart Remember Me by @casuallyhl
(NR, 5k, canon) Harry and Louis play the songs they wrote for one another.
🎼 spill your emotions into my hands by theweightofmywords / @lil0
(NR, 2k, exes) Harry thinks about the words he’s splayed on pages, how all of the hurt in Louis’ eyes have been spelled out and set to music.
— Rare Pairs —
🎼 Could We Live With Just A Taste? by @lululawrence
(NR, 17k, Louis/Harry/Nick Grimshaw) the one where Louis, Harry, and Nick all take awhile to figure things out, but they get there eventually
🎼 When You Know by lazy_daze
(T, 1k, Louis/Liam) Accidental songwriting boyfriends with accidental songwriting confessions 
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shineemoon · 8 months
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SHINee ✨ CLASH Magazine (August 2023) FULL Interview → HERE
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As humans we’re constantly evolving; how have the members’ identities shifted since the release of ‘Don’t Call Me’ (2021), and how is this change reflected on ‘Hard’? KEY: After ‘Don’t Call Me’, I’ve personally gained more confidence, and had the opportunity to experience many new things. With that said, I feel honoured and grateful to have received even more love. TAEMIN: I decided to give myself a break and not to be so hard on myself. I wanted to focus more on the feelings of happiness and the positive energy that people give me from recognizing my work instead of contemplating what I’m lacking and overanalyzing my shortcomings. And because I was able to take a different approach and attitude toward this album, I was able to enjoy this promotion and feel more comfortable. MINHO: I feel that we took another step forward through ‘Don’t Call Me’ and also showcased a new side to SHINee with our eighth full-length album. I do want to express that we haven’t changed after ‘Don’t Call Me’ – I’d word it that we’re continuously growing and evolving.
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I watched videos taken from the latest concert – SHINee World VI – and could hear how much fans enjoyed your older tracks and watching you enjoy performing them. Recently, On MBC World’s I Live Alone, however, Key was looking back on the difficulties of performing such songs as four members, and I wondered when that feeling began to ease and the members grew to love performing their classics again. ALL: Being SHINee allows us to share our past, present, and future vision together. Although it’s not always easy, we hope that those who watch our performances never feel a gap or emptiness. The unwavering support and love from our fans have been instrumental in helping us recover and strengthen our bond with them. We’re truly grateful and fortunate, and always genuinely wish for our voices to reach the skies and the heavens when we sing.
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The words ‘icons’ and ‘legends’ get thrown around too easily these days but SHINee really are both. Does it seem real for you, especially as you’re still an active, progressive group? Do you ever consider the band’s legacy and what you’d like that, ultimately, to be? KEY: I believe that we’re currently shaping SHINee ourselves. I feel that it wasn’t wrong for us to try to create and shape our own path and, actually, I’m curious about where this journey will lead us to in the end. MINHO: Rather than focusing on a specific end goal, we’ll always strive to fill our days with happiness alongside our members, staff, and our beloved fans. But I’m always grateful for the compliments we receive, and although it may feel challenging to live up to those descriptors, we’ll make it happen. TAEMIN: One of my juniors once said to me, ‘I feel like idols’ careers are extending because you continue to be active. Thank you.’ Hearing those words made me feel proud because it seems like we’re pioneering something, and when I see friends who consider me as their role model, it also helps me release all the built-up stress inside of me. Because of that, I feel a sense of motivation, I want to work even harder to inspire people, and I hope SHINee will be remembered as a group that continues to shine and remains in people’s hearts for generations to come.
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watermelonsugacry · 1 year
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i would adore to learn how/when y/n meet mitch! your posts make me so happy!
Choose Your Words
A/N: in celebration of SINCE 2010 turning 1 on Tumblr, here's how the two best guitarists in the world met! 💚
SUMMARY: After almost a year into One Direction's hiatus, Harry craves being in the studio again to make some music. After inviting his best friend and former band member, YN, onto his team, they spend the next two months in Jamaica as they make an album, uncover hidden feelings, and explore uncharted territories. (3.5k)
GENRE: 1dbandmember!yn
SINCE 2010 masterlist // Jamaica series // Previous song here! 🌵
SIDE-NOTE: italicized is voice over commentary (I wrote this kind of like the Behind the Album documentary) bold are things Harry actually said irl
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“So what did you say his name was again?” 
Today marks the first day of the official writing session for Harry’s new album. The last of the team had just finished flying in the day before and settling into their new home for the next two months. 
Much like her time in the band, YN being the only female in this team was given her own room to stay in for their stay in Jamaica. With only a couple of hours in the land of paradise, she’s already traded in her skinny jeans for shorts and her leather jackets for open button-up shirts with tank tops underneath. 
Harry is just too excited to wait any longer. YN could tell how much he’s been holding it in and he has been itching to be back in the studio to make some music. After everyone’s taken naps to overcome the jet lag, it was time to get into the home studio to bring Harry’s ideas to fruition. 
The two of them haven’t experienced writing an album like this before. They were always on the road whenever they recorded, putting down some vocals here and there in a mini van minutes before going on stage to perform to a stadium full of people. They’ve never had the chance to set a month or two aside to solely focus on creating such a magic piece of art. Despite already getting in the studio to get started working on the album, it already feels like a vacation.
But before they could even get started, she had to ask about the last member of Harry’s team that she wasn’t able to meet before making the trip overseas. 
“Mitch. Mitch Rowland. He was Ryan’s roommate.” Harry answers as YN takes a sip of her smoothie she made earlier that morning. Her and Harry walk side by side down the hallway on their way to the built-in home studio. The house they were staying in was absolutely beautiful. It was just sitting off the coast so almost every window in the house had a view of the beach. It has a lot of open space in each room, a spacious backyard and a patio area for get-togethers, but YN’s favorite part of the house is the home studio. She can’t wait until hers gets done by the time they get back from their trip. 
“Wait, what happened to the other bloke that was supposed to come in?” 
Harry takes the cup from her hand and takes a sip for himself, “He bailed.”
“Just like that?” YN raises her eyebrows in surprise as he nods around the cup. “Well shit. Is this new guy legit then?” 
“Ryan said Mitch has been working at a pizza shop for the last couple of years and that they’re pretty good friends.” She nods along before being handed back her cup. “Met him about a week before we came out here and he’s pretty fucking wicked at the guitar. He’s pretty stiff competition compared to you.” 
“Har, har,” YN playfully rolls her eyes at his teasing but the compliment simultaneously inflates her ego and gives her tummy butterflies at the same time. The feeling in her stomach only increases as she watches Harry rake a hand through his new haircut.
Only a week before they need to take off to Jamaica, YN and Harry take the trip back to Holmes Chapel to a very excited Anne. The woman never fails to extend a warm welcome—especially towards the young lady who her son’s been secretly in love with since he was a teenager.
They stay by the doorframe of Anne’s small kitchen and (despite YN’s few attempts to talk him out of it) watch as Harry gets ready for his first haircut in almost two years. He takes off his shirt since he doesn’t feel like plucking the hair off of the fabric, leaving him in his pajama pants. The two women watch as he gets his long locks tied back in a low ponytail and YN can’t help the giggle that tumbles out of her lips.
“What are you laughing at?” Harry can’t help but chuckle as well. As much as this transformation is needed in order to transition into this new chapter in his life, there’s no denying that he’s feeling anxious as well.
“M’nervous! I can’t help it,” YN beams, tightly linking her arm with Anne’s.
“You want to cut a bit of it off?” Harry offers.
“Like hell m’gonna to be partly responsible for this crime being committed in front of me eyes.”
The people in the room laugh at her playfully offended tone and Anne pats her hand reassuringly to the young woman’s arm. YN’s had her fair share of hair transformations over the years. For Harry, his long hair has always been her favorite. She remembers the day he told her he planned on growing it out with the intention of donating it and the day he asked her about some ways he could keep his hair out of his eyes—introducing his love for headscarves and small clips. She remembers when she had a real shitty day and he let her braid his long hair to cheer her up...only for him to keep them on for the show they had later that night. She loved to card her fingers through his hair and watch his eyes fight to stay open.
Right as the hairdresser begins to grab at the low ponytail and brings the blades of the scissors to his hair, YN playfully covers her eyes and digs her face into Anne’s arm, “I can’t watch!”
“I was the one with the long hair. I’ve had it for so much of One Direction that cutting it off just felt like starting afresh.”
YN’s eyes peek through the gap in between her fingers as she watches the deed be done. Harry also has a hand over his eyes and playfully groans out in pain. 
She snaps a couple of pictures of him initially getting his hair trimmed before leaving to the living room to let him have his haircut in peace and have a chat with Anne. And once it was officially over, Harry only adds to the anticipation of his new haircut reveal when he tells her to cover her eyes.
“Hurry up, H. M’already all worked up.”
“Okay, okay,” She hears the sound of wood—presumingly the coffee table—scraping against the floor before he takes a take on it to be in front of her. “Open your eyes, love.” 
Her eyes make their way up from the two birds on his chest up to his head.
“Huh,” She smiles contently at the sight in front of her. Harry’s hair no longer reaches below his shoulders. The curly curtains that once framed his face have been removed. His newly short locks don’t seem as curly as it used to be but they both know it’s still there. Harry’s hair is styled in an upward motion and all she wants to do is run her fingers through it.
So she brings a hand up to do just that. She combs her fingers through the top of his hair and she’s slightly surprised that his hair is not long enough for the action to last longer. Her gaze moves down to his eyes and sees him waiting for her approval. 
“Is that a good ‘huh’?” He asks when she hasn’t said another word.
“It’s a good ‘huh.’” She tilts her head to the side as she continues to stare at him and a smile of his own creeps onto his face. She’s definitely going to miss his long hair, but on the other hand, she thinks his new look suits him as he starts a new chapter in life. And if she’s being completely honest with herself, he looks so fucking handsome.
When he sees her eyes continuing to bounce around the top of his head and around the rest of his face, he playfully pushes at her knee, “Stop or else I’ll get conceded.”
His chest swells when he sees that gorgeous smile of hers only become that much brighter, “Oh I think you’re way past that.” 
“I was about to personify my hair but I decided not to,” Harry huffs out a smirk from his seat in front of his interview chair. 
“M’excited for you to meet him though,” Harry says, rubbing his hands together. “Getting a lead guitarist is just the beginning for all this, y’know? Like it makes this that much more real.”
It’s really exciting to see Harry so excited about his music. Going from being in the band for five years and putting out an album a year was tiring to say the least but the fact that they were making music that they loved balanced out some of the stress. Now as an upcoming solo artist, it was inspiring to see him as passionate about music as he was when she first met him all those years ago.
“Well let’s stop wasting time then and let me go see how wicked this guy really is.” YN smiles and reaches for the door handle but before she can touch it, his hand covers hers. She blinks up at him as he brings their joined hands to his chest.
“You think talking to me is a waste of time, lovie?” Whether it was the teasing look in his eye or the way he smirks at her with his dimpled cheeks, but it has her mind going blank without a witty comment to fire back. Yet this is how they’ve been for years: making jokes that were borderline flirty, causing the other person to smirk or playfully roll their eyes in fake annoyance, acting like one another’s actions didn’t have an effect on them when it utterly and wholeheartedly did. Since they couldn’t do anything about it with the strict restrictions of the no-dating rule in the band, there was no harm or foul with these kinds of conversations.
Now everything is different.
They aren’t in the band anymore.
These stubble comments and questions left them searching for the truth behind each word that pushed past the other’s lips. Did the other person actually mean what they said or was it just them being how they always are? 
At a loss for words, she furrows her brows with a rigid shake of her head, “N-no, I-I mean—”
“M’joking darling,” An amused smile graces his face from seeing her all flustered and tongue-tied. It’s a rare sight so whenever he’s able to catch her off guard in this way, he relishes in it.
YN pulls her hand away from Harry’s with an eye roll and a scoff, trying her best to play off a cool demeanor, “I know tha’.” 
Despite her efforts, he continues to smirk down at her before twisting the door handle and pushing the door open. 
“After you,” Harry extends a hand out towards the room. With one last look at him, she enters the room with the rim of the cup to her lips to hide the heat creeping its way up to her cheeks. She sees two of the producers, Tyler and Alex, messing around with the buttons on the panel and in a light discussion. 
She also sees a guy in the recording room through the window above the huge studio console. His long hair covers his face as he looks down to tune his guitar.
“Is this him?” She asks, feeling Harry behind her. 
Tyler turns around and gives a quick nod, “Should we let him know we’re ready for him?”
YN cocks up an eyebrow with a hand lazily resting on her hip, “Let’s see what he’s got.”
Given the good girl persona that One Direction’s management forced upon her during the majority of her career, no one would really expect her to look so intimidating. Sure, there’s always going to be some slight intimidation for the fact that she’s a member of one of the most famous bands in the world, making music that quickly lands them at the top of the charts, putting out new music, and performing to sold-out stadiums almost every night—but she’s been so prim and proper externally that some people wouldn’t think twice to write her off as anything else.
As the last year of the band progressed, more and more of her personality began to shine through to the outside world. She’s a harsh critic and doesn’t like to sugar coat shit—especially if it comes to a big project like this for one of the most important people in her life.
So as she takes a seat on the leather sofa chair with Harry sitting on the arm rest, she puts one leg over the other and crosses her arms over her chest with a neutral expression on her face. Harry might say that this hippie looking guy is a good guitarist, but YN needs to see that for herself.
“I was a bit skeptical about Mitch at first, m’not gonna lie,” YN lightly laughs in her interview chair. “I mean, v’seen a lot of talented guitarists so far during my music career so I was mainly looking to see like, ‘what’s so different about this guy?’” 
From the first note that the guy behind the glass riffs—as cool as it was—she keeps from showing her thoughts and brings her cup to her lips. Harry pinches at his bottom lips as he watches for her reactions; needing her approval for something as vital as this racks his nerves like no other. 
As Mitch continues to play, Harry sees the way YN begins to slowly move her head to the pretty melody. Her eyes scan the spot on the floor in front of her as she listens closely to what’s being played and the infamous crease in between her eyebrows appears.
“But the moment he started playing, he just...” She shakes her head with a smirk. “...he blew me fookin’ socks off.”
Mitch does a really cool riff on the guitar that has the four of them in the room whoop and shout in amazement.
“Woah!” Harry stands up from his seat and lifts his arms in the air. 
“Holy shit!” YN lets out a laugh, putting her hands to her temple in disbelief. “Are yeh fookin’ kidding me?”
The next thing she knows, Harry’s removing his pink button up, crossing his arms across his torso and removing his shirt to place it onto her lap behind him. The two producers in the room soon catch on and start laughing hysterically at the sight before them.
Harry then proceeds to shimmy out of his tight, black jeans, leaving him in his tiny briefs, and sticks his arms in the air. YN places her index fingers in the corners of her mouth and blows out a loud whistle both for Mitch's guitar skills and Harry's undressing.
The two of them don’t waste another second as Harry takes her inside the recording room to formally introduce her to the newest member of the team.
“Mitch, this is my best friend YN. YN, this is—”
“Mitch fookin’ Rowland,” YN smirks, taking his outreached hand. “S’nice to meet yeh, mate.”
“Thanks, same here,” Mitch gives her a shy smile. “Harry’s told me a lot about you. He told me you’re a musician too?” 
Trying not to be thrown off by his innocent tone, YN glances at Harry at Mitch’s unexpected comment but she’s quick to bounce back, “I am, yeah. Nothing too major though. Play a bit of guitar as well.”
“Yeah, and by ‘a bit,’” Harry throws a hand on her shoulder. “She means she’s practically married to it.”
“You have to show me some of your secrets then,” Mitch motions to the guitar that’s still pressed against himself.
“Sure, but before that, you gotta show me how you did that one riff earlier,” YN says as she’s already reaching for one of the guitars she’s brought for the trip and throwing the thick strap over her shoulder.
It’s strange to meet someone who hasn’t known their band. YN can’t remember the last time she met someone where they didn’t know her name and her success prior to being formally introduced. Since she was sixteen years old, she began to feel like everyone knew everything about her: her feelings, her background, what she was fucking thinking just because they read something in some sleazy, tabloid article. People had preconceived notions about her but with Mitch, it’s the complete opposite. It was an uncomfortable experience at first, but then YN fookin’ loves it.
“The thing with Mitch is that since he had no experience with being in a recording studio and YN having the same, if not more, experience with songwriting and that sort of thing, it really connected us in a way where the three of us sort of, balanced each other out,” Harry explains, before pitching at his bottom lip with his thumb and index finger. “We had each other to lean on and work this out together and the three of us wrote the majority of the album together.”
“The first song we wrote together was Ever Since New York,” YN recalls as she pushes a strand of hair behind her ear. “Knowing from personal experience, the best form of therapy and venting out yeh feelings is in songwriting so...that song was just waiting to come out of Harry.”
A major part of creating music is being vulnerable. It’s an intimate experience to write songs, especially with other people, in letting other people see your hurts, your feelings, and the kinds of thoughts that can keep you up late at night. It’s one of the reasons why YN and Harry are as close as they are. It took some time to get used to it at the beginning of their careers together, but they let each other see the deepest parts of themselves. They tell each other things that they’d be embarrassed to tell anyone else with no fear of judgment; they’ve created a safe space in one another...well, as safe as one can feel when they’re secret, deeper feelings for their best friend.
Ever Since New York came to life fairly easily; songwriting can be that way when writing from life experiences. After finalizing some of the lyrics about Harry’s sick father with YN and working out the chords with Mitch, the next they knew he was laying down the vocals for the song. 
As everyone gets to work in the studio, YN finds herself reverting back to her old demeanor in the band: sitting in the corner of the room watching as the four male producers work their magic in front of the huge console of buttons and sliders. Not that she minded all that much since she was hired as a songwriter, there was nothing in that kind of job description for her to be with the other men producing Harry’s songs.
She knew her place without being told and she’s had years of experience in learning how to be okay with that...but that didn’t stop her mind from dreaming about being up there, moving various sliders, typing away at the desktop computer, and helping fix vocals as they appear in their zigzag form on the screen.
As if hearing her thoughts behind him, YN’s head perks up when Tom—better known as Kid Harpoon—spins around in his seat and beckons her over with a nod of his head.
When Harry comes out of the recording booth, a smile spreads across his face when he sees YN sitting in a swiveling chair with everyone else, clicking away at the desktop mouse as Kid points to the screen. She nods to whatever he’s saying and highlights the recorded vocals to make the needed adjustments.
When Kid sees Harry come up to them, he pipes up, “H, you didn’t tell me we got another producer on our team.”
“Oh, no s’nothing—” 
“I thought you knew,” Harry says in-matter of fact, interrupting YN before she can finish. When she blinks up at him, he nods over to the computer screen. “Wanna show me what you’ve got so far?”
She gives him that smile that has been making his knees weak since he was sixteen years old. “Okay. Okay, yeah. Um, so here’s a bit from the first verse you did earlier...”
As she shows him the work she’s done, it takes him a second to make his eyes stop bouncing around her profile. She speaks so passionately about her work, her eyes lighting up like a kid in a candy store. The way her plushy lips push and pull with each word has him wanting to reach out to run his thumb over her bottom lip.
After all these years, how has his feelings for her not gone away? 
He thought maybe this time it would be different. They’re not in the band anymore...but with her being hired on as a member of his album-making team, they’re practically co-workers once again. 
Harry pulls his eyes away from her face and looks at the computer screen in hopes to drown out those intrusive thoughts. He just hopes this doesn’t affect their work...shit.
Next Song Here! 👻
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jmdbjk · 1 year
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Oh, Jimin...
These are my personal impressions, thoughts, interpretations and opinions on Jimin’s solo FACE album. Some of the things I say here are built on things I know from past original content, interviews and what Jimin has shared personally. Some of it is just me reveling in my first experience with Jimin’s long awaited album. 
It is such a serious album. Jimin said this is the story of what he was feeling, chronologically, 2020-2022, during the pandemic era. At the beginning of 2020, BTS was rising higher than any Korean artist ever had before and then all of a sudden the momentum came to a halt, and there was nothing. Having the life you’ve known suddenly jerked away from you is traumatizing. 
Once the king of social media, Jimin almost ceased by the end of 2020 and never went back. “Oh, he just outgrew it.” No, the man was struggling with his issues and not only did he not need to see the extra crap spewed all over social media but he had nothing left to give, nothing left inside. 
I noticed how Jimin looked physically back in 2020. He was downright frail y’all. The man was trying to give us what we wanted at the expense of his mental and physical health. That breakdown he had during the ending ments in Memories 2020 was too much. They were all stressed out, but Jimin... those that said he was being over dramatic... the man was struggling with his mental health.
I wrote this last June, 2022 but never posted it: 
After Memories 2020 dropped, we’ve heard Jimin say he struggled after everything got canceled. Days upon days that turned into months upon months and more than two years passed before they finally returned to in-person performances. He stated that during isolation and lockdowns he wondered what was the purpose of his life, or that he had lost his purpose.
Jimin’s struggles were most likely much more severe than he let on and he 100% kept it to himself because he didn’t want us to worry about him. That sounded like solo delusional projection but think about Jimin and how he’s behaved in the past...always telling us not to worry. Always saying things to reassure us that he’s happy, he eats well, don’t worry.
There was no working, no performing, their lives and his life changed drastically overnight just like all of ours did. Would we ever get back to normal? What will happen in the future? When will all of this end? 
Face-Off
The album opens with a carnival calliope, it was a little jarring and unexpected. The images it conjured in my brain as the notes played were of a worn out circus winding down. It made me think of the big wild circus that WAS his life, and it just wound down and keeled over. 
Knowing the premise of the album, I think the title, Face-Off, implies Jimin is looking at himself. Speaking to himself. The lyrics could also imply he is speaking to someone else, like people he once trusted. But I don’t think so. 
He was having a confrontation with himself. Reasoning and bargaining with himself.
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Maybe he once trusted himself but in this time and place in which he finds himself, he questions what is he doing? and second guessing himself. Day in and day out, the days are all the same nothingness. Hiding his feelings, faking it, pretending it was all ok. It’s all cool. It’ll be all right. He has said many times he looks back at that time and thinks he could have done more for the fans. Being hard on himself. His own worst critic. 
And then this enters the picture: using alcohol to self-medicate. Getting drunk. Numbing the pain. Forgetting. Drink all night. Oh, Jimin...
We know he has a very high alcohol tolerance. He once mentioned that he used to drink a lot. When he declined the champagne during the live after the Busan concert, we all made jokes about it and moved on. Oh, Jimin. 
Face-Off feels like it could have been a purging song when he wrote it. A little primal, you know... just scream, get it out. Painful but cathartic. 
This is the lyric that was scary: “tonight is a beautiful night, I think I’m close (or I think I have it all/I think I’ve found myself)” were chilling to me because they did not come across as optimistic, they came across as being at the end of one’s rope after becoming a shell of a person. He follows that line with “tonight I don’t want to be sober.” Oh, Jimin. 
His vocals open very low and moody then transition to a plaintive cry, punctuated with anger. 
Pour it down, pour it out... the anger, the emotions, the words, just pour it out. 
Interlude: Dive
Like the calliope that sadly wound down, Dive opens with the melody slowly winding back up to speed. Another day starting. Someone knocks, voices, the ambience of a normal day, breathing, running footsteps. The crowd cheering and Jimin’s voice during his ending ments at the Busan concert, more sounds of people in his life. We hear Jimin’s footsteps trudging, it sounds like we hear him climbing steps, entering his house, closing the door, and first thing he does when he is alone in the quiet is pour a drink and drinking deeply. I am concerned. 
Maybe it is supposed to represent the closing of Chapter 1, about a day in the past that was once a “normal” day, since it included the last things he said during that concert.
The music track is dreamlike, repetitive. Living in a dream. Every day. Same thing. Go home. Drink. Do it again. Dive means go deep. In deep. He’s in deep. 
There is a very subtle line between drinking in order to make it through another day/night versus drinking to relax and wind down. A slippery slope to walk on every single day.
We’ve transitioned from the world changing overnight to living in a daze trying to pretend everything is ok. Coping.
Like Crazy
(I am going to express my thoughts using the English version of the song.)
Jimin has explained the song is influenced by the movie of the same name. 
I have learned that the dialogue from the movie was NOT original to the movie but hired voice actors specifically for the song: “I think we can last forever.” “I’m afraid that everything will disappear.” “Just trust me.” And at the end: “How long again?” “What’s the point?”
He has said the dialogue that was used fit the message of the song. I have not seen the movie. I don’t think the song is a literal interpretation of the movie. I think the song’s basic concept is the emotional struggle trying to maintain a dream. But maintaining a dream is unrealistic no matter what you do to try to make it last. Jimin had to come to terms with that.
Jimin’s vocals begin very light and airy, very dreamy. 
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[God, he’s fine.]
The vibe of the song is sort of retro, very much evokes the artist, The Weeknd. It has a very 80′s synth beat. It is a very danceable song. Like I said, on the surface.... very dreamy.
Vocals transition and it still seems like he’s having a conversation with himself, or with a voice within himself. A voice telling him to “trust me, follow me... I will make it good for you.” Me: gives a side eye to that voice in Jimin’s head because now I know it’s not trustworthy. “I’ll take the pressure off, been reaching for the stars.” Chasing that high. Go easy, Jimin. Please be careful.
Yes, the lyrics are also very sexy... “give me a good ride,” and “Let me have a taste.” Yep, I’m with ya on all that... ahem... 
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[Wow]
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[side note: I love the make up in the bathroom scene with that stroke of silver under his eye.]
“All my reflections, I can’t even recognize.” ...what he sees of himself is not reality. He doesn’t recognize himself. Don’t try to save me. I want to stay like this. 
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To me, the mud on the floor, the mud flowing down the walls, the mud on the hand that grabs his wrist at the beginning of the song, the mud on his hand at the end... could represent his perceived imperfections, flawed, therefore dirty: his struggle to cope, his less than perfect thoughts... substance abuse... the struggle that he needs to be perfect on the outside or the attempt to appear perfect on the outside but there’s all this dirt on the inside that he can’t hide any longer.....the huge pile of mud at his feet is out of place in the otherwise normal room of his life. Becoming overwhelming for him.
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Some of the visuals of this song are, to put it bluntly, very, not heterosexual. Again, these are just my impressions and opinions. But a friend pointed out the photo on the front of his pants and I went looking for information about the art photographer, Robert Mapplethorpe. He was heavily involved in New York’s gay BDSM scene. Some of the things written about him: 
“In a rapidly changing society, he fearlessly confronted taboos surrounding gender, sexuality and mortality, seeking to instill beauty and dignity into subjects that lay outside accepted social norms.”
“... a man who consistently brought his audience face to face with the unknown and the unseen.”
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The song ends with him reaching toward the camera to smear it with the mud to hide his imperfect self. When Jimin puts his face in front of the camera, he doesn’t want us to see his imperfections. He wants to be as perfect as he can, he says it all the time, he wants to look pretty for us, but I hope he has realized we accept him as a real human being even with his very human imperfections. 
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Alone
The alarm clock goes off...yet another day...doesn’t trust the people even if they are nice to him...he’s lost...day in day out... passing out drunk and not remembering...what am I doing? am I the only one feeling like this? Alone, pretending to be ok...every day the same...how much more until I can go back to before? Feeling more and more isolated within his own mind, pretending to be ok but losing himself every day. Mayday. The cry for help. Telling himself it will be all right (we all told ourselves this back then). The small nagging voice that doesn’t believe it. 
Realizing you’ve changed and you are never going back to the way you were before. 
Not gonna lie, that line right there broke my heart. Gives new meaning to Set Me Free Pt. 2′s line: "raise your hands for the past me.” 
He was in so much trouble and no one knew. He reassured us over and over that he was fine. Not to be over-dramatic but I don’t want to think about how close he was... I have seen a few people say this song really resonated with them. It is a very powerful cry for help.
Jimin’s vocals blew me away. The vocals start out very subdued, almost beaten down. His vocal fry squeezes my heart. He ends crying out “what do I have to do to end this darkness?” Bad twilight. Night’s can be hard.
Set Me Free Pt. 2
From my post on March 17, 2023:
Going insane to stay sane. Raise your hands for the past me. Now set me free. This is where I literally cried. Oh, Jimin.
Going crazy trying to fake being ok. 
Now I know this song is about him saving himself, setting himself free from this prison he was in, the depression, breaking the chains of alcohol dependency, of telling the naysayers out there and his own internal naysayer to go fuck themselves, Park Jimin is back. Strong and beautiful and fierce. The light of the moon shining on us. 
We know he still considers soju his joy. He sounds like he’s taken control, not totally abstaining, but in control. I only wish the rest of his days are happiness and stable mental health well-being. 
Letter
So unexpected. I was in shock. My heart floated away. 
People talk about how Jimin’s album has no collabs on it, unlike the previous member’s solo work. My opinion is, when you are sharing deeply intimate feelings and emotions and struggles about yourself you don’t want or need other people/voices on your song. It’s not appropriate. 
The only exception to this was… Jungkook…not exactly a collab, but he’s there. The other songs used background vocalists who are not members of BTS. 
This song was hidden. Yes, there have been other hidden songs. But come on...
Letter has a strong stroke of Promise in the “oh, oh.” And when Jungkook starts singing it is like the world is set right because those two voices blend like nothing else I’ve ever heard. And he comes in in the middle of the song gently supporting Jimin’s vocals. But unmistakably Jungkook. I know it’s up to interpretation, but for me, the lyrics from then on take on something a little extra in meaning with Jungkook there singing with Jimin. 
You held your hand out to me and now I will hold on to you. So simple and beautiful. The sounds of the surf remind me of the song “Okinawa” that Jimin posted once. Which also reminds me of their pics at Santa Monica beach...
Letter seems to be an actual letter. When the members told him to write it down, put it in a song, maybe Jimin’s first impulse was to write it as if it was a letter. The lyrics are simple and very to the point and convey:
“...though I’m not good with words, I want to sincerely say let’s make each other happier. You who showed me I am bigger than my small self. You've been by my side and I will be by yours. I hope we stay together until the cold winter. Though the future is unknown and scary, let’s stay together. Never forget we’re together.”
There are references to past songs: Sea, Spring Day. Both of those songs were from 2017. 
But Jungkook. On a Jimin song. That was hidden. Clever. That we had no idea about...even though Kookie knocked us over the head with it when he played the guitar for us, making sure we knew he’d only had one lesson. Who do you think gave him that first guitar lesson? Jimin... and Kookie blurting out some English in his last live... who do you think he’s been practicing English with? Duh, Jimin. 
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It was a hidden song AND the credits were hidden on the page in the book. They were printed in varnish only, which is basically shiny, clear ink.
You know what I think? Jungkook knew about this song since Festa dinner. The teasing about not being offered the chance to listen to the song. That little shit. I KNOW IT WAS THIS SONG!! I JUST KNOW IT!! This was the rumored subunit. Or at least one of them. I guess we’ll eventually see if there are any more between the others.
They sound so beautiful together. I love them. And as I keep saying, they are fine… they’ve been fine.
Last words...
Anyway, that was a lot of words. Maybe I got too deep. Jimin explained himself about how the album originated. 
As I was telling my friend earlier...everything in this album has peeled a layer, or several layers, away from EVERYTHING I've seen and heard from Jimin and the group since 2020. I had written some things in the past, like last June and even before that, about how Jimin seemed not well mentally. Things that I had no business saying in public because who the hell am I to think I can say something like that about someone I have never met? So I never posted those words. I never thought I would be so close to the mark in thinking those things. He’s been through it, wrote songs about it, and moved on. And I am so proud of him and this album. 
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kittyball23 · 7 months
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Hello How're you ? I wanted to give you an idea to write. What do you think about writing the last act to take place on Wakai Island, like Branch proposing to Papi there or something?
Here it is! It's another minor rewrite of my oneshot "The Proposal"
We Are Family (a Trolls fanfic)
If Branch hadn’t known any better, he could’ve sworn that he was a baby again, standing on the stage with his brothers, feeling happiness fill him with great warmth.
The illusion was a good one, and this time he didn't have to hold any worries over anybody arguing or walking out on each other. If that glorious Family Harmony that they'd accomplished back in Mount Rageous was anything to go by, he, John Dory, Spruce, Clay, and Floyd were tighter than tight - best friends and brothers for life!
And they would prove themselves in that strong bond for their audience.
An excitement built within the quintet as the spotlight turned on them. They stood shoulder to shoulder, hearing Vacay Island's serene waves lap in the background, and hearing the crowd compose of their friends and family clapping and cheering. They grinned at each other. This was going to be a GREAT performance!
"Everyone can see we're together, as we walk on byyy," Branch sang, spreading his arms out wide.
"And we fly just like birds of a feather, I won't tell no lies," Floyd sang, coming alongside his younger brother for a quick side hug.
"All of the people around us they say, can they be that close?" Clay sang, busting a slick breakdancing move that looked to be a combination of a one-armed cartwheel and a split.
“Just let me state for the record…” John Dory sang, making a finger gun, as Spruce finished with “We’re giving love in a family dose!” while winking at his wife, Brandi, and their dozen children.
The five sang the chorus all together, stepping in rhythm with each other, voices strong and proud.
“We are family,
I got all my brothers with me!
We are family,
Get up everybody and sing!”
It was a perfect song to use, because they were a family - a true one, by blood and bond. WIth the rhythm and each other, they were going to be together forever!
From the sidelines, Poppy and Viva cheered enthusiastically, clapping wildly and without end. They just loved the show!
Suddenly, both girls were surprised to find that they were being welcomed onto the stage with them! Branch, in a similar way as he had done the first time on Vacay Island, extended his hand out to Poppy, which she took with a gracious smile. And in a not too differentiating way, Clay extended his hand out to Viva, who blushed slightly as she was brought onstage too. It was then that the two girls, alongside the guys, flowed perfectly together to create a colorful, stunning Family Harmony!
The applause that came afterwards was well-deserved and thunderous. This really was one of the best shows anybody had ever been treated to!
Poppy wrapped her arms around her boyfriend and squeezed tight. “I love you Branch!” she chirped happily.
Branch snuggled and smiled down at her, “Love you too, Poppy,” he whispered. Then, he twirled her flawlessly, suddenly bending down on one knee before her. The motion made the Pop Queen gasp loudly as she realized what was happening.
No... it COULDN'T be... could it??
Is Branch going to ask what I think he's gonna ask?!
“Poppy…”
The Pop Queen almost jumped at her name, brought back to the reality that confirmed that Branch really, really was still kneeled on one knee in front of her. Her heart raced, pounding so fast and so loudly in her chest that she was hoping it wouldn't drown out his words. And the question that he may or may not ask.
But am I REALLY ready for this?
Branch was also thinking the exact same thing as Poppy. Was he ready to do this? One look at his brothers, who were quite delighted with the turn of events, and he knew that the answer was yes. John Dory, Spruce, Clay, and Floyd each wore very supportive look on their faces. They were proud of their little brother taking the initiative, and would back him up. Branch didn’t delay in presenting his question.
"Poppy," he started again, "I, umm... I didn't really plan a big speech or anything. Which, I know, sounds very unlike me – crazy-prepared bunker survivalist guy and all, heh heh..." He paused, letting out a chuckle. "But I did have a question I want to ask you. It's, um... actually something I've been wanting to ask you for a while now. And I'm not sure if you'll say yes, or if you'll say no, if you'll find it cool or too gross and weird. I'm not even sure if you're okay with me asking you in front of everyone like this!" – he gestured to the audience that Poppy had forgotten was even there – "But I won't know the answer to any of that unless I just go ahead and do it." Branch took a deep, calming breath, knowing that Poppy was hooked onto his every word, his every little movement and gesture, watching him closely, anticipating.
Everything felt like it was going in slow motion when he reached for her pink hand, grasping it gently in his, and using the other to reach into his vest pocket.
"Queen Poppy, you're the happiest Troll alive... but you might just end up making me the happiest Troll alive instead if you say yes to my question, which, not required... it IS your choice in the end, but, I uh, I've just really gotta know," Branch said, making sure he didn't continue rambling on and simply cut to the chase of what he was intending to say, the words that had long been aching to leave his mouth finally escaping his lips in a sweet, relieving release. "Will you... marry me?"
There. He'd said it. Finally!
And she'll say yes, right? Branch wondered. I mean, I DID tell her she doesn't HAVE to say yes, but... oh frosting, I really, REALLY hope she does...
Without realizing it, Poppy had started to almost hyperventilate, her breaths coming fast, and her cheeks wet with tears that she hadn't even realized were even pooling up in her eyes.
Branch looked concerned. "Poppy?"
The brothers were watching in awe, Spruce nudging JD. "Dude, I think he broke her!"
But Poppy was not broken. She was the opposite of broken. She was… ecstatic!
"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSS!!!!!"
She screamed her answer so loud that it almost felt like it had broken the sound barrier itself, bursting across the land like a sonic boom! A scream that shook all of Vacay Island like a rumbling earthquake, even more intense than when the isle’s volcano erupted! And she continued to affirm her answer with dozens upon dozens of kisses on her now-fiance’s face.
"YES! – mwah – YES!  – mwah – YES!  – mwah – YES!  – mwah – YES! YES! YES! YEEEESSS!!"
Branch gladly allowed himself to be smothered in her affection, as she made sure that no part was left unkissed. His cheeks. His forehead. His chin. His brows. His lips...
Branch's eyes bulged and a gasp escaped him right after he felt her sweet mouth press against his, even if it was for just one brief second. Reacting upon him, Poppy too gasped. She was about to apologize, when Branch swept her in and closed the gap between them. Poppy’s mind blanked from bliss. It was their first kiss.
Or should she say, kisses, plural.
Because there seemed to be no end to the kisses. Each time they parted, they went in for more, making up for every time they’d had to urge to engage but hadn’t.
Clay raised his brows. “Wow! You’d think they never kissed before,” he murmured.
“You don’t say,” Viva giggled. Then, suddenly, she got up on her tiptoes and pressed her own sweet peck against Clay’s cheek! The lime-green-haired Troll gasped and then blushed heavily, his face growing warm in the spot where her lips had been. John Dory and Spruce nudged him knowingly, while Floyd shook his head in amusement.
“Sis! This means I get to plan your wedding, right?” Viva asked giddily.
Poppy giggled, still clinging onto Branch and not intending to let go anytime soon. “You bet you can!”
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differenteagletragedy · 4 months
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HI i have a domestic brainrot lately and I wanted to see your take on how the olba boys (individually) would be living with mc? either romantic or platonic is ok!
take a flower 🫴🌸
I thiiiink I've done something like this before so apologies if there are any repeats! But yes, domestic boys!!!
-- Cove is not a cleaner, not because he wants to be a messy guy, but he just doesn't think about it. Maybe just talk about a routine, a division of household responsibilities, that sort of thing and he'll be all over it.
-- Like I'm not saying to make a chore chart for him where he gets gold stars for doing his chores and after so many gold stars he can get treats like a pretzel down on the shopping street or a trip to the aquarium (that one is gonna be a lot of stars) but whatever works!
-- I def know I've said this multiple times, but Derek is Mr. Fix-It. If he doesn't know how to fix something (rare), he will figure it out and then he will know forever.
-- This is so serious, like if you end up buying a house and you mention that it might be nice to have like a sunroom or a playroom built onto the back of the house for kids or whatever, the guy is going to learn how to build a whole entire room. Putting up walls, putting down floors, other ... room stuff. It'll be a big project, obviously, but he'll get it done.
-- Imagine going outside and seeing him up on a ladder, banging a hammer against something all sweaty and concentrating hard. Or like imagine respectfully.
-- Derek is also a big time holiday guy. Tons of Christmas lights, the house is all decorated for Halloween and he's got on a costume and a wide variety of candy and treats to hand out to the kids. Your house is THE house to hit up on Halloween.
-- If you have kids and do an Easter egg hunt, Derek is going to be the king of this. Cove is gonna come over and hunt too and he's gonna be mad when he can't find them all.
-- Anyway.
-- Speaking of decorating for holidays, have you guys ever seen those little goose statues that people put outside and dress up for different occasions? Here, let me link it in case you think I'm crazy, this is a thing. You can get silly little outfits for every little holiday you can think of. You and Baxter saw one once and he joked about it, then you got one as a joke, then you got it outfits as a joke, and now no one knows if it's a joke anymore but you HAVE to make sure the goose has an appropriate outfit on.
-- Baxter also has some expensive candles. So expensive that you're kind of taken aback (they are all just wax, where does they money go), but the place DOES always smell really nice. He has seasonal ones he rotates, then some general favorites that work anytime.
-- If you try to light one of the pumpkin-y candles after December starts, he will treat you like you are actually insane.
-- Dance parties with Cove! We always talk about dancing with Baxter, but sometimes you and Cove just have a good time, putting on those songs that were popular when you were kids and being silly. This is really very cute.
-- Cove can't cook, but he goes through a phase where he tries real hard! Please be nice, but if you cannot safely eat something, then you don't have to (this is going to happen at least once or twice).
Cove: *gestures to chicken breast that is clearly pink in the middle* It's like when you go to a restaurant and order a steak rare!
You: No baby it really is not.
-- Derek is a grill guy. He has a "Kiss the Cook" apron and no one ever knows if he's wearing it ironically or not. Please kiss him anyway.
-- What if whenever you and Derek finally move in together, he goes through a stage where he doesn't really want to leave for long stretches of time because he's just so so happy to finally be living how he wants, to have told you how he felts after YEARS and to have you reciprocate those feelings? He would probably get too much energy, he's used to wearing himself out everyday, so he'd be running around the house like a puppy, just all excited.
-- That's not really anything, it's just cute, sue me if you want.
-- Living with Baxter is going to make you surprised that he survived for years on his own, that's how bad he is with mornings. Sleepy Baxter is a menace to himself and everything around him. What if you move into a house and he tells you he's going outside one morning to get the paper, and it's taking too long so you peek outside and he's just like standing out there in his pajamas, vaguely confused but also just not totally there. You're going to have to pull him back inside, it's not safe out there.
-- Derek and Baxter are both very clean, we already know that. They might like a chore chart too though, everybody likes treats!
-- Cove is going to be bringing home little presents regularly, you'll have like a little shelf just with trinkets he's found that made him think of you. Think little sea creature keychain from Step 1, like just so many little items that represent special things to you.
-- Derek is going to take care of you like you've never been taken care of in your life. Also wowee, the cuddles! Derek is a grade A cuddler, super warm and cozy.
-- It might take Baxter a little bit to get truly comfortable with living together, he's going to be scared you're going to leave or change your mind, like you'll realize that he's a mess (like you didn't already know and made it clear that you love him anyway) and be done with him. He'll get there though, please be patient!
-- And if he has to work late, please change the goose's clothes, he doesn't want the neighbors to see it in a pilgrim costume the day after Thanksgiving, how embarrassing.
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onceuponapuffin · 2 months
Text
My Good Omens Season 3 Predictions
Based on the Amazon Playlist and Established Patterns in S1 and S2
I’ve been listening to the songs on the official playlist that Amazon released in December, and I’ve been thinking about it non-stop. It’s been long enough, and now I feel like I have a solid enough footing to have ideas about season 3 based on the information given to us by the playlist (especially the songs Neil provided). Keep in mind that this is my speculation only. I may be entirely wrong, this post may age poorly, but I am okay with that. At the end of the day, I know for absolute fact that I will be THRILLED with whatever season 3 actually brings (But please – for my sanity – let there be a happy ending for Crowley and Aziraphale).
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First of all, we know the season was outlined back in 2005, and I would assume (for the sake of this post if nothing else) that by the time the s3 announcement came, Prime had the general outline. And so, in the spirit of how this show does things, the playlist is full of Clues.
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GIF by fuckyeahgoodomens
I’ll put the songs in parenthesis as I go.
Between “Before the Beginning” and “In the Beginning,” i.e. Flashback 1:
We’re going to start the season with Crowley’s Fall (Midnight Rain). Neil has said that he’s not going to ever tell us Starmaker’s name, so I’m not expecting that. But we know that each season starts with a prologue, and we also know that these flashback mirror the current events. Crowley’s Fall makes a lot of sense to start with because it is the first thing that pulls him and Aziraphale apart. And where are we starting from in present day? The Divorce.
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How Are Crowley and Aziraphale Doing?
Bad (I’m a Mess). Crowley presents fine to the world, but we, who know him, can see he is struggling. I don’t know if he’ll actually go to therapy, but I would adore it if we got a glimpse of Crowley trying it and being like “NOPE” when it got too hard. He keeps expecting Aziraphale to walk around every corner, and keeps replaying the divorce in his mind (Just My Imagination).
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Aziraphale isn’t doing well either. The Kiss, and by extension his last conversation with Crowley plays on his mind all the time (Could’ve Been).
Very soon after the playlist was released, one of my Good Omens friends on Discord (I forget who it was, I am so sorry), suggested that maybe Aziraphale is communicating with Crowley through his dreams. Honestly, I am so on board with this. With the number of songs that mention dreams and daydreams in this playlist, there is no way that Crowley’s dreams and/or imagination won’t play some kind of role in this season (In Dreams, Just My Imagination).
Minisodes
The Titanic
I think the most interesting thing is that we’re going to have at least one minisode about them alone through time. It’s something that we haven’t seen before, and it parallels their current journey.
That being said, I think one of these will be the Titanic (My Heart Will Go On). Here’s how I see it happening:
Crowley is the one on the ship. He’s not there to sink it, he’s just there to enjoy himself. Maybe he plays around with the kids a bit, maybe he makes friends. Point is, the humans have built this supposedly-unsinkable ship of dreams and he just has to see it. He’s there when it sinks. Maybe he even tries to save people or get the other ships to come faster, but he can’t save everyone.
Heartbroken, he returns home to his dark flat. He doesn’t turn on any lights. There are two envelopes waiting for him. He sits at the table to read them in the dark. The first is a commendation from Hell:
“Great job sinking the Titanic! Downstairs are Very Impressed with your work, as always!” He scoffs and tosses it aside. The second one is from Aziraphale.
Oh great, he thinks, Just what I need, a little ‘oh how dare you drown all those people you evil demon you.’ when I’m already feeling like shit. He opens it anyway. The first lines read:
“My Dear Crowley,
I heard that you were aboard the Titanic when it sank. Are you alright?”
Crowley breaks down and cries. ~End Scene~
1941
The playlist has Heart and Soul on it, but not a recent version – it’s specifically one that was recorded in 1939. So we’re almost definitely getting 1941 Part 3.
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GIF by mimisempai
We’re going to find out what happened to cause their huge shift in dynamics from Date Night to 1967, and I think it’s a kiss. Maybe a kiss on the cheek? I’m not entirely sure. I do hope they get to slow dance to A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square though.
The Reunion
My friends, it will not go well. This is one of the songs that Neil chose – Cry Me a River. It just reeks of Aziraphale coming back and Crowley being (understandably, and rightly) being bitter towards him. Aziraphale will, eventually, I’m sure, get back in his good books, but he’s gonna need more than an I Was Wrong Dance to do it.
(Actually?) Saving the World
Okay so being perfectly honest, the only reason either of them are the lead characters in this series is because they’re so freaking loveable. They are very bad at their jobs. Anathema, Newt, and Adam saved the world in S1, and although the Husbands gave Adam a little pep-talk, I think he’s smart enough that he could have managed it on his own if he had to.
So, this time they actually need to save the world and have an actual plan. This is where I think a second body swap will happen – hear me out! First of all, remember that no one aside from Gabriel (who is Someone Knows Where), none of the angels or demons have figured out their trick from the first time. So I don’t think it is the plan, but I do think it will be part of the plan. Where am I pulling this idea from? The Show Must Go On, another one of Neil’s choices. It sounds like it’s from Aziraphale’s perspective, but Queen songs are usually associated with Crowley. Seems odd, right? Maybe because it is. Maybe because they swap.
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The Book of Life
I think we’re going to see The Book of Life, and I think it’s going to basically be The Book of Love. I think this is where we’re going to get the Main Thesis. The Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything, if you will. Love. It’s supposed to be Love.
The Book of Love – another of Neil’s choices.
Epilogue
I predict they get their South Downs cottage (Neil said “not yet,” which implies it’s coming). And there’s also a wedding, though I’m not sure whose it will be (The Book of Love). I REALLY hope that it’s Crowley and Aziraphale, because they deserve that kind of happy ending, and Neil is too much of an Ally not to realize how important it is that they get to Live Happily Ever After.
One Last Thought
I still have no idea what to make of I’d Rather Go Blind. That’s it. That’s the last thought I wanted to share that doesn’t really fit in anywhere else.
Thanks for going on this journey with me. Let’s make our Bingo cards and see if I managed to get anything right in 3-4 years.
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reyalvr · 1 year
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oki i have a req now !! can u make a fic of #18 and #19 with tsu'tey and reader (i have a big fat crush on him) where they're on a date night laying down somewhere just cuddling and enjoying the moment. while cuddling, reader confesses that they've dreamt of having a family before, meeting and being mated with tsu'tey and just indulging with all the love they have at that moment but then also shares to him that they're scared that it'll get taken away from them soon and that sometimes it feels too good to be true (either bec of sky people or for other reasons). hehe its straight up fluff with a hint of angst but you can add more details abt their family status like are they just newly mated or are they already established for n years with kids or with their standings in the clan (olo'eyktan/tsakarem) and etc.
ps. specifically wanted #18 cause i get lucid and prophetic dreams too and they happen way too often for my liking -🐬
SEE YOU AGAIN.
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୨⎯ in which feelings and thoughts are confessed. ⎯୧
genre┊ fluff, slight angst
pairing┊tsu’tey x fem-omatikaya!reader, tsu’tey x tskaha-mo’at’ite!reader 
wordcount┊2.4k
warnings┊ slight movie spoilers
author’s note┊ AHHHHH i love this request sm it’s so cute !! as always, feel free to listen to the song recs i added since these are the songs i listened to while writing this teehee … simon franglen put crack in ‘happiness is simple’ istg 
song recs ┊ see you again, happiness is simple.
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Tsu’tey had many sides to him; fierce, strict, and even cold. But there was a side to him that was unknown to most of the clan. It was the side that had captured your heart, the side that had made you so irrevocably in love with him. 
Gentle. 
You watched from afar as Tsu’tey played with the children by the river, their giggles and laughter filling the forest each time he splashed them. Most knew him as a ruthless warrior of the Omatikaya, even more so after the recent destruction of the sky people. He was recognized as one of the finest hunters your clan had seen in years, his skills and talents surpassing most of the men his age. 
But you knew him as him; kind and patient Tsu’tey. Even in your younger years, he was always softer with you – like he had some built-in switch in him everytime he interacted with you. Needless to say, the match between the two of you was fate. 
Tsu’tey’s voice roared as he found two of the kids hiding behind the rocks, each one encircled by one of his arms as he carried them. They laughed even harder as he spun them around, the other kids coming up to him with fake attacks. 
“Now!” One of the girls yelled to the group as the sounds of little feet splashed loudly towards his direction. 
“What is this! Have I been ambushed?” He said, a mocked expression of surprise painting his face. 
Though your husband was a mighty warrior, not even he would be able to withstand the strength of energized children. He fell back into the water, the kids in his grasp landing on top of him as the other children continued to surround him. You couldn’t help but laugh along with them as you finally made your way to them. 
“Oel ra’un! You have bested me, you sly hunters!” He said in feigned desperation. 
The children yelled in victory as he moved to sit up properly, his smile gracing his features. He ruffled one of their heads, the small child giggling as he did so. The girl who had led the ambush spotted you then, her eyes lighting up as soon as she saw you.
“[Y/N], [Y/N]! Look, we have defeated the river demon of the forest!” She exclaimed, her fist pumping up as she continued to wield her makeshift blade. 
Tsu’tey turned slightly, clearly surprised to see you here. He was not upset, though, as you were already aware of these excursions he had with the village children. He smiled even wider, glad to have your lively aura grace the younglings. 
“I see, ma’evi.” You said, stroking your head as you looked down at your defeated mate. “How very noble of you, the village is safe!” 
Tsu’tey only stared at you as you spoke, his smile never faltering. You held your hand out, pulling him up out of the water. Once he was stable, he pecked you quickly on your temple as his hands came up to stroke your back. The children cringed at his affection, and you only laughed. 
“It is getting late, ma’eveng.” Tsu’tey paused to let go of you momentarily, crouching down to be level with the little ones. “You must return to the village before Tsahik scolds me.” 
Their groans of protests and pleading whines made your heart melt; you were always swayed by children and the light they brought to the harsh realities of life. You almost pleaded with them, almost begged Tsu’tey as well if they could play a little longer.  
But you knew he was right, the children needed to be back soon before it got too dark. The forest was home to many beautiful things, but it was also home to luring dangers. They all looked up at you, their eyes wide with childlike wonder. You only nodded in agreement with Tsu’tey’s orders, and they finally gave in once they realized they wouldn’t be able to persuade you. 
You waved them off as they started making their way back, their disappointment fizzling away as quickly as it came. You felt Tsu’tey grab you by your waist then, a more intimate gesture now that the kids were gone. You smiled at him, your ears pinning back as you made yourself comfortable in his grasp. 
“I didn’t know you were coming, yawne.” He said, stroking stray hairs away from your face. “I have a persona to live up to, you know.” 
“Persona of what? Being the river demon?” You teased, and he nudged you lightly. 
“You know what I mean.” He said with a knowing tone. “I cannot let you have such leverage over me, I am the Olo’eyktan-in-waiting!”
You laughed at him as you moved to place your hands on his shoulders. He was as dashing as always, even more so in the warm light. 
“The children love you, that is not leverage.” You replied seriously, though you knew he was only joking. “It is admiration.” 
He only hummed before he closed the gap between the both of you. His lips were so plush, so soft. It felt like heaven every time he kissed you. His passion engulfed you fully, and your hands came up to cup his face as he moved to wrap his arms around your lower back. When you finally pulled away he pouted, and you stroked his bottom lip with a smile. 
“Come,” You said as you stepped back, arm outstretched for him to take your hand. “I want to fly tonight.”
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Flying on your own was always an exciting feeling, but flying with your mate was something entirely else. It was an experience that you wished upon everyone. The sky people would call it love, but it was more than that. Txasunu was what best described it; to do something you enjoyed tremendously with the person you loved greatly. 
Your laughter filled the night sky as you sent Tsu’tey and his banshee a gust of wind, flying under him to avoid his own retaliation. You sped forward, sending him yet another blow. 
“Skxawng!” He yelled, though you knew he meant it lovingly. 
You looked back at him through your visor, your fangs showing as you beamed brightly. You swerved upwards then, flying over him as you were suspended upside down. Tsu’tey had never gotten used to your skill as a rider, and he figured he never would. Amazing would not even begin to describe you; you were brilliant. 
He laughed as he finally moved to be level with you, the both of you spinning around each other before dipping back down to fly over the hanging vines that connected the floating mountains. You yelled out into the air as you both made it over the rocks, your laughter never fading. 
His hand gestured for you to follow him as he yipped, and you quickly flew to the direction he had pointed to. He was ahead of you now, navigating the both of you up to one of the grass plains that grew atop the mountains. He landed swiftly, and you followed soon after. 
He held you by your waist as you hopped down, his grip secure so as to not let you slip. You thanked him quickly before removing your visor. You could see clearly now, your eyes adjusting to the darkness of your surroundings. The grass glowed as you stepped on it, illuminating your movements. 
“That never gets old,” You said, spinning out of his hold. “How is it that my father chose you as Olo’eyktan-in-waiting when you can’t even beat me in flying?”
“Because Eywa has blessed you with abilities so strong that it leaves you unbalanced.” He smirked at you, grabbing your arm to pull you close to him once more. “Your father chose me to balance you out.” 
You smiled at him before he pulled you down to rest, his back leaning against one of the smoother rocks. You sat in between his legs, your back pressed up against his broad chest. He let out a heavy sigh once you were comfortable, wrapping his arms around you. Your hand went up to hold one of his arms, your thumb tracing small shapes on his skin. 
“Now this,” He breathed out. “This never gets old.”
You laughed lightly as he nuzzled your neck, his lips pecking your shoulder. 
“You are awfully affectionate today,” You paused to tilt your head up to him. “Not that I am complaining, though.”
He chuckled lightly against your shoulder, still peppering kisses along your skin. Your heart was happy in this moment, the solace of being safe in your mate’s arms quelling your tensenes away. You leaned further against him, closing your eyes as you matched his breathing. 
Though you were recently mated, your bond with Tsu’tey had stretched back all the way to when you were still young. He was never good with expressing his feelings – his real feelings. You were aware of the expectations his parents had set for him, and you always did your best to relieve him of the weight of it all. 
He did the same for you, just not outright. But anyone who knew him knew that he only had eyes for you, and that he would quite literally go to hell if it meant that you would be safe. You were grateful for him, grateful to the Great Mother for allowing you to meet someone who cared for you as much as you cared for them, if not, even more. 
Now that you were one with him, you felt it was your duty to make sure he was free from shame, free from the torment of never being good enough. None of it mattered to you anyway, in your eyes he would always be perfect. You kissed the inside of his forearm, right on his pulse. 
And while your efforts seemed to have worked to keep him steady, the suppressed concerns within your own heart had started to take over your mind once again. 
“Tsu’tey?” You whispered. 
“Hm?” He replied, his head now resting atop yours. 
“Can I tell you something?” You looked up at him, watching him as he still kept his eyes closed. 
“Anything, yawne.” He whispered back.
“I dreamt of this once.” You said softly, your hands still holding onto his arms. “Dreamt of being with you.” 
He looked at you now, confused. “Why would you have to dream? Surely you could not have doubted my promises to you-”
“It is not that, ‘Tey,” You reassured, turning your body to face him fully. He did not let go of you, only adjusting his arms to rest on your lower back. “It’s just- I was afraid. And I still am, sometimes.”
“What is it that troubles you?” His confusion was now replaced with concern. “Tell me and I will do everything in my power to stop whatever it is.”
“I believe it won’t be that simple, yawne.” You said as you shook your head slightly. “My fears concern the sky people.” 
He hissed at the mention of the demons, infuriated by the fact that they have been clouding your thoughts. You sat upright then, grabbing his hands to place them on your lap. His lips had formed a slight frown, his expression troubled by your worries. 
“This fear has been brewing inside of me for so long, Tsu’tey.” You said, your tail laying flat as you confessed your feelings. “The day I lost Sylwanin, my baby sister, I was changed. I thought I was going to lose everyone to the sky people – I thought I was going to lose you.”
He sighed as he moved to hold your face, his eyes looking deep into yours. You had no tears in your eyes, only a pensive look as you continued to tell him your thoughts. 
“I pushed these fears away by dreaming, dreaming of what life would be like without the sky people – without all this tragedy.” You said, your hand coming up to grasp his wrist. “I dreamed of a lifetime of happiness with you, dreamed of having our own family one day.” 
“[Y/N], please hear my words as I say this,” His expression softened. “You do not need to dream, because I am here. I promised your father that my sole purpose to the Great Mother is to make sure you remain happy, remain safe.” 
Your heart swelled, a wave of relief washing over your senses. You knew deep down that it was pointless to worry about such things, but still it troubled you. Nobody could ever be sure of what the future held, not even your own mother. The will of Eywa was absolute, and it could be cruel just as much as it could be divine. 
But you didn’t linger on your worries for much longer, finally smiling once again. You leaned forward to kiss him, relishing in his comfort. He was gentle with you, his hands moving to rub your back as you held his face closer to you. The scent of the forest still lingered on him, fresh and earthy. 
You pulled away to rest on his chest, one of his hands coming up to caress your head. You heard his heartbeat then, steady and strong. You laid a hand directly on top of his heart, and he held it as you soothed yourself of any more troubling thoughts. 
“So,” He said, breaking the peaceful silence. “A family, you say?” 
You smacked him lightly as you laughed, your spirits lifted from the dull emotions you had been feeling only a moment ago. 
“Yes, a family.” You said as you stared up at him, a smile gracing your lips once again. “Two children, if we are lucky.”
“Oh, we most certainly are.” He replied almost immediately. “Our first born will be a strong Olo’eyktan, I am sure of it.”
“Or Olo’eykte.” You added, already firm on your decision of succession. 
He hummed, smiling as he did so. “Of course. A girl would be a fierce leader – just like her mother.”
“And a boy would be a mighty warrior.” You said, still beaming up at him. “Just like his father.”
He held you closer, and you felt content – you felt at home. You yawned then, your body starting to succumb to your tiredness. He rubbed circles on your hand as he lulled you to rest with a melodic tune; his songcord. 
“Sleep, yawne.” He said quietly, his own fatigue starting to take a toll on him as well. 
You felt yourself smile once more before you finally drifted off, his voice the last thing you heard before falling into a restful slumber.
“I am here.”
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reyalvr © 2023 ... do not repost, alter, or steal my work.
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taglist┊@wishuroses, @neteyamslovrr, @avatarkv, @cheolattes, @samiiistarss, @normspellsman, @sharkybabe9.
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chouxsardine · 4 months
Text
The Lucky Ones -- Danny Wagner x reader
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Summary: Does superstition still work its magic when it comes to love? --a spontaneous new year tradition leads to confessions between you and Danny
Pairing: Daniel Wagner x reader
Word Count: 3229
Warnings: mention of alcohol, cussing, superstitions, slight allusion to previous abusive relationship, insecurity
Genre: fluff, COTTON-CANDY-GRAPE LEVEL OF SWEETNESS, friends to lovers
Author's note: Here is a VERY LATE Danny's Birthday/New year fic and also my first time writing Danny! Inspired by the viral tiktok trend about amusing new year traditions. I find them very interesting. I wish everyone a belated happy new year and all the best wishes. Please enjoy :))
🎧: The Lucky Ones by Lana Del Rey (by now titles from song is canon lol I'm so sorry)
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You have always been a superstitious person, not religious, not believing in magic or the supernatural, just superstitious. Yes, you do believe ghosts exists, and you try to cover your eyes and ears when watching horror films. You hold awe and veneration for some “higher power” like your primitive ancestors. Since childhood, you have always been meticulous about the details, from the direction in which your slippers are pointing at when you take them off before bed to what to eat for breakfast the day of your school theatre showcase. Growing up, many people misunderstood your behavior as symptoms of OCD, but only you know that it is merely the result of your obsession with coincidences and the compulsion to recreate the happiness they have brought to your life; far from being diagnosed as an disorder.
You are going to spent the New Year’s Eve with Danny. You have known each other since you were little kids and have been best friends for over two decades. Friends and families have been teasing you two about being together, and almost everyone thought at least one of you was going to make a move during Christmas. But, alas, nothing happened as the days passed, and here you are, about to draw an end to another year of your friendship. Your feelings for Danny have certainly have developed beyond just platonic level, but you also didn’t want to ruin the precious friendship you have built throughout the years. Plus, you have to admit that you are waiting for a sign. Ah, yes, it is your superstition at work—you believe that there will be an omen indicating the time is ripe to confess your true feelings for Danny. It is not very often that he gets a break from touring and returns home. For now, you just want to be close to him, spend quality time together, and create more memories.
It is safe to say that you nearly jumped off the couch when you saw the trend about “eating twelve grapes under the table at midnight of New Year’s Day for good luck.” How are you only seeing this the afternoon of December 31st? You are already at Danny’s, and the only food you brought over is your renowned passion fruit cheesecake.
“Danny? Do you have any grapes left?”
“What?” Danny yells back from downstairs.
“Do we have any grapes?” You look around the room. The fruit bowl on the counter is filled with limes, which are for making margaritas later. Oh, you should have known better.
“I don’t think so. Do frosted grapes count?” Danny enters the living room and opens the fridge door.
You watch expectantly as Danny opens the freezer section. To your disappointment, there are only five freezer-burned round objects that could hardly be identified as grapes huddled together in a ziplock bag.
“What’s wrong, y/n? Suddenly craving some grapes?” Danny asks amusingly.
“No…well, yes,” You defeatedly close the fridge door and show Danny the post you just read. “It says you’re supposed to eat grapes for good luck.”
“Hum…”Danny’s eyebrows knit in concentration as he skims the article. “I think grocery stores are still open today.”
That’s the thing about Danny. Although you try to hide your superstitious behavior from others, you are never afraid to be yourself in front of him. Instead of thinking you are weird or childish, Danny finds your “little rituals” cute and endearing. He never presses on with questions, which only makes you more willing to explain them to him. And Danny is one hell of a listener.
Nothing compares to the last grocery run of the year. Maybe last-minute Christmas shopping comes in a close second. You are prepared for sensory overload when you see the preoccupied parking lot.
“Looks like everyone forgot something for their dinner,” Danny pulls open the passenger’s side door. Panic suddenly struck you.
“What if everyone has read about it and grapes were sold out?”
“I guess we will find out in a minute.”
Your worries almost became reality. There were only a few bags left on the fruit shelf, and they were obviously being picked over—from the plastic packaging, you saw a few were squished and watery, the ones near the bottom looked withered and brown. But you were positive that you could knock together twenty-four grapes from them.
“I swear you’re my lucky star, Danny. I bet there would be none left if you didn’t come with me.” You sigh in relief as you put all the remaining three bags into the cart.
“That’s a lovely to hear, y/n. Anything else we need for auspiciousness?” Danny asks half-jokingly.
“Actually, we do!” You remember the title of the little pop-up link as you scrolled to the end of the article and saw it mentioned collard greens and black-eyed peas.
Collard greens were easy to find; the panic threatened to twist your stomach again when you didn’t see any canned black-eyed beans.
“Kidney beans…chickpeas…romano…lentils….” Your eyes move fast down each row. “They only have bags of dry beans and we don’t have time to soak and boil them!”
Danny is scanning the label with you until he reaches to the top shelf and grabs a can of mixed beans.
“Look, there’s black-eyed peas in mixed beans. We can just pick them out,” Danny suggests.
“Oh my god, that’s genius!” You perk up immediately.
“Just making good use of my height advantage, I guess,” Danny beams.
On the way home, you are humming along to Queens playing in the radio and clutching the grocery bag containing a bundle of collard greens, a can of mixed beans, and three bags of grapes in your arms, as if you are taking home a puppy from the shelter. Danny couldn’t help but smile at your little expressions of contentment; he loves how you are always able to preserve the childlike innocence to appreciate all the tiny beautiful things.
As soon as you get back home, you dive into further research. By dinner, you had watched a dozen of different videos and five more articles about how exactly one should eat the grapes, answering your question of which colour grapes should you eat (both are fine, and you made sure to buy both red and green ones), whether you should eat them at the countdown to the new year or the first minute of the new year (the latter) , and whether you should sit under a table while eating it (answers vary on this one, but you decided to do it under the table anyways).
Danny is washing the grapes at the kitchen sink.
“Y/n, do you want to pick out the twelve you’re gonna eat?” He asks as he drains them in the strainer basket.
“Oh yes! Thanks for washing them, Dan,” You scamper over. Danny looks so cozy and relaxed in his sweater. His curls tied back into a small pony tail, a few stubborn strands framing his face. The hot, attractive drummer on stage that has the fans screaming and swooning is so different from the huggable human-sized teddy bear that you get to see a lot more often, but it still has the little girl inside you all rosy-cheeked and fluttered nonetheless. For a moment, you are lost appreciating his profile, his lips slightly pursed, long eyelashes casting shadows as he looks down in concentration. The grapes look delicate in between his strong and lean fingers.
“Y/n?”
You are pulled back from your thoughts and bump right into Danny’s mossy brown eyes staring at you. You feel your cheeks getting hotter. Is it still normal to feel the butterflies even after you’ve been friends for so long?
“You are doing this together with me, are you?” You ask as you hold up two grapes to the light, turning and inspecting them as a gemologist. You never wanted to push your own habits and rituals onto others. You have learned from that mistake in past relationships and have since been careful about not coming across as the superstitious version of the lunatic “horse girl”. Although Danny has been considerably supportive about this—buying the grapes with you, coming up the clever solution with the beans, and now this grown ass man is leaning over the kitchen counter and being the judge of a “grape beauty pageant” —the insecurity deep down still peeks around the corner.
“Of course, my dear. I wouldn’t say no to some good luck for the new year.” You can tell Danny’s smile is genuine. Upon seeing the curve of his lips, you could heard the bubbles of second thoughts in your mind popping.
“Look, we even got the cotton candy kind of grapes, those are your favourite.” Danny holds up a bunch of particularly green and shiny grapes.
You almost let out a chirp at the sight of it. You must’ve ignored the label as you hurriedly picked them up at the store. As the name suggested, they do taste like cotton candy. When your teeth break open the skin, the juices are like pure honey pouring down your throat. “And they make the best frosted grapes too!”
“You’re right. We can make another batch with the left overs to ‘replenish our frosted grapes arsenal’.”
You feel a warm, tingling sensation on your palms. Itchy palms are a good sign, right?
Half an hour to the new year, you have already situated yourself under the bar table in the kitchen, the only table in the entire house that is high and spacious enough for two grown adults to crouch under.
“Mind your head!” You extend your hand to pad the underside of the table as Danny gets down on his knees and scoots next to you, almost bumping his head.
“Ooops, close call,” Danny sat down cross-legged. “You know what, I just realized my house probably wasn’t the safest if there was an earthquake or something.”
“Shhh….Danny!” Out of your superstitious habit, you immediately put your fingers on his lips to shush him without much thinking. “Knock on wood!”
Danny pliantly knocks three times on the table above his head, laughgin at your seriousness.
You withdraw your hand, the softness of his lips lingering on your finger tips. “I don’t think this little table is going to do much anyway if it really comes to that,” you said.
“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you.”
The phrase came out his mouth so naturally, without a single second of hesitation. It transported back you into the time in kindergarten when you were pushed aside while waiting for you turn to play on the slide, you looked up through tear-blurred vision; the time when you were on a camping trip and you were nervous about stepping off from the canoe onto the river bank; the time in the scary escape room where your palms were all sweaty and your teeth were biting your bottom lip so hard that it almost drew blood…all these times, there were always a pair of steady hands beside you and a calming voice saying, “Don’t worry, I’ll protect you.”
You quickly blink a few times, getting back to reality and focusing on the two plates in front of you. It must looked like the weirdest “Girl Dinner”—a forkful of boiled collard greens, one tablespoon of black-eyed peas rinsed and drained straight out of the can, and twelve grapes (six green and six red).
“Okay, enlighten me on how to do this,” Daniel asks.
“So I looked into it a bit more. We are supposed to eat each grape along with each chime of the clock once it strikes twelve, but realistically I don’t think anyone can do that without choking, so we just have to make sure we finish all of them by 12:01. Then we eat the veggies and the beans.”
“Uh-huh, weird combinations,” Daniel muses.
“I know. That’s why I got us champagne afterwards to wash it all down.” You point to the two glasses not very far from you.
“Damn. All teed up.”
“Oh I almost forgot! One more very important thing: you are supposed to think about the wishes for the new year as you eat the grapes, one for each month!”
Your palms grew slimy again as your eyes glued to the counting down on the phone screen.
“Oh my gosh, Danny we are doing this…six, five, four, three, two, one!”
You close your eyes and start popping grapes into your mouth one by one. The excitement and adrenaline crush down the twelve preformed coherent wishes in your mind into word soup. Apart from the recurring ones like “health,” “safety,” and “happiness,” the letters spelled “Danny” again and again. Wishing Danny to stay happy and healthy, luck and success for the band and touring, hoping you get to see Danny more, spend more time with Danny, be with Danny….
You swallow down the last bite of your grapes as you open your eyes. You see Danny looking at you, smiling, his cheeks still puffed like a hamster from chewing. There is something magical about seeing the person you wished for right there the moment you open your eyes. It is like seeing the fairy godmother popping up on your birthday cake after blowing out the candles. You giggle as you both devour the greens and the beans, and your glasses clink together as you gulp down the champagne, releasing the satisfied “ahhh” exhale afterward.
“Oh wow.” You hold up the phone. The both of you watch as the seconds tick to 00 and the minutes change from 0 to 1.
“Happy New Year, Y/n.”
“Happy New Year, Danny.”
You two still sit in the not-so-comfortable position under the table, listening to the echoes of the chimes and the sound of fireworks in the distance, savouring the imaginary freshness of the new year, taking it all in like sniffling the smell of ink on the crispy pages of brand new books. Suddenly, you feel the warm feeling slipping away from you, as if visualizing a red line dropping on a thermometer. You don’t know if it’s the sight of the empty dishes and glasses or the adrenaline ebbing away, you aren’t prepared for the previously tamed insecurity to suddenly resurface. The aftertaste of the grapes turned sour in your mouth and made your skin crawl.
“What’s wrong, y/n?” Sensing the change in your mood, Danny turns to you, immediately finding your hands and soothingly brushing circles on your palm with his thumb.
“Danny, are all these…am I…too much?” Your voice are incredibly quiet, fearing it will break. Before Danny can answer, you continue, “do you think this is too….childish and crazy?”
“Okay, y/n, take a deep breath,” you felt the warmness of Danny’s hands steady on either side of your cheek, grounding you in his loving gaze and gentle touch, “you’re not going to cry on New Year’s Day, that’s not good.”
You take in a shaky breathe, trying your best to ease the stinging feeling in your eyes as the tears threatened to spill.
“Good girl. Now, talk to me. What happened? Why are you sad all of a sudden?”
“Danny, I just felt like…” you are plagued by the flashback of the hurtful words of your ex, it still stings as you recite them, “I need to grow up and quit these stupid superstitious nonsense, quit fooling around like a five-year-old…and, and treating everyone around me like one!” You inhale deeply again to regulate your breathing.
“No, y/n. Look at me, and listen.”
“You don’t make eye contact with the microwave timer when it’s has 13 seconds remaining. You always try your best not to step on cracks on the pavement, which makes you sometimes do those goofy strides. You always visit every wishing well in the cities we travel to.”
Your eyes widens as Danny recounts each of your weird little habits chapter and verse. Wait, he remembered all of them?
“I don’t give a fuck what other people have said about them, and I wish you don’t either.” Danny always tries not to swear in front of you, so you know he really means it when he pulls out those words.
“They are what makes you…you. They are an essential part of being y/n, and that’s important. You should never second-guess or change yourself just because some asshole yaps about it. Remember that one time you told me you always cling on superstitions because you feel like good things don’t often happen to you in life, so when they do, you want to remember the way they come and try to make sure they visit the next time?”
You nod, your heart melting.
“Hearing that breaks my heart, y/n, because I think you deserve all the good things in life. It’s my wish that in the new year, this beautiful, kind, and wonderful girl in front of me will stay away from toxic people, keep the people that love and cherish her close, and always prioritize her own well-being.”
“My wish and my luck is seeing you be happy, you know that? I’m the luckiest man in the world when my girl is the happiest.”
“Danny…” You lean into his touch, closing your eyes for a few seconds to savour the moment. You feel like an air ballon fueled by the love in your heart, free and fearless.
“I really like you, y/n,” he said, “as a friend and more than a friend.”
“I like you too, Danny. My feelings are mutual.” The words automatically fall out your lips, as if they have been prepared for this moment for years.
“Yeah? You know what my other wishes are? I hope y/n can be my girlfriend. I want to prove to her how lucky and deserving she is of all the good things.” He is looking at you as if you are the most precious being in the whole world, and in this moment, you truly are.
“I think…I can make that wish come true.” You say timidly, your hands also cupping his jaw. You can feel the pulse on his neck, eager and quick.
“You know it’s also good luck to kiss loved ones on new year’s day, right?” He whispers as he draws your chin to pull you close. Without any hesitation, you attach your lips to his. The kiss is soft and loving, with the residual sweetness of cotton candy grapes.
Because you were closing your eyes and making your wish, little did you know, Danny was watching you every time he popped a grape into his mouth. Every wish he whispered silently in his heart is related to you. He hoped that you’d be by his side for all the twelve upcoming months. He would be the happiest man in the world if even one of your wishes included him.
It turned out that good things don’t always need a sign to happen. True love is always on the hunt; it may creep up on you or catch you by surprise, but either way, it will always find you in the end.
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Yeah! you made it! Thank you SO MUCH for reading :))
any comments and feedbacks are greatly welcomed and deeply appreciated
Do let me know if we want a tag list :D
Some more of my works: Mariner's Complex || Permission to Fall
Ticked (all my boxes) || Love is a four-legged word
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writerthreads · 2 years
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How to write a satisfying ending
By Writerthreads on Instagram
I found that writing endings is one of the hardest parts of writing. There has to be some emotion behind it, but how much? And do you make it happy, or sad? Satisfying, or suspenseful? All of these are hard questions that you have to ask yourself even before you start. Here are some tips to help you with your story's ending.
Know what you want
When you're planning your story, have a rough idea of how the book or series will end, or at the very least, what will happen to your main character(s). This way, you can revolve your plot around the character and move things around while the final few scenes remain unchanged.
Try different endings
Experiment with different endings for your story. Will there be a final battle or a grand event? Or is there a surprise ending? You could build the story towards an ending that the readers can predict then change course last minute to spice things up.
Mimic the beginning
Does your story start with a phrase or at a special location? Use it again in the grand finale. If the story starts at a New York City penthouse, you could end it there again in a full circle. If it starts with a sentence that a character says, let them, or someone else of significance, say it again. (This works especially well if the original character says it dies.)
Invoke emotions
In my opinion, the best endings are bittersweet and satisfying. Make sure that the readers feel something, so they will continue to think about the book long after they're finished with it. Some of these books include The Fault in our Stars, The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue, The Midnight Library, and The Song of Achilles, to name a few.
Allow room for expansion
If you don't feel quite satisfied by the ending and think that you can go further with another undeveloped storyline in your book, or you want to expand the world you've built, you can always write a spinoff series! This was done beautifully in Chloe Gong's Foul Lady Fortune, that continues a few years after Our Violent Ends.
Make it satisfying
Whatever you write, make sure the story feels concluded. Every major plot point should be purposeful, and they should all lead to the ending that feels closed. Make sure that all plot holes are fixed, and anything left ambiguous can be inferred to be left like that on purpose.
This is a bit hard to explain, so it's better to ask beta readers this question when you send the final draft off to them. We have a post called "Questions for beta readers" for more information!
Whatever you decide to do with your story's ending, treat it well and write lots of versions of it until you get the perfect one! Good luck and happy writing!
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kiyrian · 4 months
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Since we get several Alan's through the game my theory is this:
The "insane" Alan in AW1 DLC -> Scratch in AW2
Mr. Scratch in AW American Nightmare -> Zane in AW2
My rumbling why under the cut
In the Dlc to the first game we see Alan's split himself in two. One part of him wants to fight, to get back to Alice and Barry and everyone he loves. The other is done, he is fed up with himself, and any further tries at escaping. He is rumbling about the darkness. Only when the Alan we play as, the still hopeful one gets to him, pats him on the back they once again become a one person.
For me this version of Alan - one that is hopeless, overtaken by his own Darkness is a previous iteration of what we see in Scratch in AW2. This hopelessness and anger and guilt just manifesting as a 1. Living double in AW1 DLC 2. A dark force that can overtake Alan but can also overtake others. Maybe because is stronger now as a parautilitatian, maybe because it finally has someone else to posses. Although in the second case it still travels after Alan like a lost puppy ("see I made us happy, you're the best author ever now!" - which seems like a daydream someone who is done with reality would escape to). So it's rooted in Alan's insecurities and doubts about himself, just manifested outside.
On the other hand we have Mr. Scratch from American Nightmare. A more playful, outright sadistic version of Alan. He isn't as much grief as he is creativity without moral bounds mixed with 2015 villain vibes. (I love him but I also know "I can't decide" by heart so I'm not a good point of comparison). He is the personification of how public saw Alan - at least when it came to scandals. He has one more quiet moment but seems to give up on trying to work with Alan rather quickly. And of course the Happy Song about how much of a psycho he is. The song that only shows up in AW2 when Zane is there. Zane who offers drinks, goes around half naked, dances with a camera and acts out shooting Alan (with finger guns). Also Zane who seemed soo moved by Scratch'es writing. Zane who is a movie maker (Mr. Scratch in AN did make those movies for Alan...).
So what's happened to Thomas Zane the original? He is gone. The original has been gone for a long time, we have never met him. For what we can see if his photo in the first game he had a short, light hair. He went down with possesed Barbara but then escaped to that bubble world just for them. So we meet the Bright Presence inside his body that guides Alan in AW1. Mr. Scratch doesn't even kick out the Bright Presence from the body - he is simply convincing everyone that Zane always looked like that in AW2.
Also the poems Zane quotes are the same ones that have been delivered in the ARG through the shoeboxes. I think that our Zane is built up from those scraps left by the original Thomas Zane. Yet since the poet has scratched himself from existence there isn't much left and besides Mr. Scratch is too much fun to just be a poet. Nooo, he must be celebrated. He must be dramatic, stage being killed (making Alan sad over supposedly killing his friend) only to smile and spout poetry
The question then would be: where is the Light Presence?
Here I am less sure. Maybe it is still helping Alan but grew weaker as time went by? Maybe that's how the bullet of light got created - it was the Presence that helped Alice. Maybe Mr. Scratch/Zane just destroyed it (I don't think so, but it's a maybe).
Also isn't this funny how much Thomas Zane haunts the story? He's been dead since the '70s but his writing, his visage and his fight for the woman he's loved echo through the whole series
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mlsofh · 4 months
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Theory Three -  Hells war with Heaven
Hello Wayward Sinners! I am here with a theory today about what will happen to the Hazbin Hotel by the end of season one. I have lots of rising suspicions from the entire trailer, so let’s take a look at it all. Just a reminder I have no idea what’s going to happen. I’m taking what I know about modern media and my analysis skills to try and piece together what will happen. I’m happy to be surprised by the Hazbin Hotel staff and everything they’ve created so far. Now, onto theories. My first overarching theory is that the Hotel will become a safe haven for sinners if they want to change. Instead of Charlie trying to get everyone to heaven, she’s going to see heaven doesn’t care about her or the citizens of hell. That’s probably what is going to cause her to bond with her father and get people more on her side. That’s how she convinces him to go to war with heaven. In the ending trailer song, Charlie states how the angels are a deadly threat, and the ensemble says, “We cannot take it anymore, the time has come to go to war.” Suggesting Hell is tired of Heaven’s exterminations. This probably implies that Charlie will have touched Hell’s hearts rather than Heavens. Hell will help Charlie in a way. Heaven I think is going to hire people in Hell to do some dirty work to get the hotel destroyed(See the trading cards.) Thus, why Alastor helps protect it. Also, Vaggie is a little too similar color palette wise to not be related to exterminators and she probably has an idea of what’s going to happen. Sure, Adam could just tell hell “Hey fuck you all we’re doing another extermination because your princess was too pushy” but that wouldn’t be satisfying. I have a feeling that’s why Emily is a character: a connection to Heaven through Vaggie. Emily looks related to Sera (Freckles, heavenly, similar if not same color palette) but Emily looks very warm and friendly on her trading card, which is probably intentional. She looks like a character who’d betray Heaven in order to help Hell. Emily probably sees something in the hotel. Probably even sees something in Charlie. Trying to convince Adam or Seras to give them a chance. I could see this going very poorly in Charlies favor. The war between heaven and hell is what will cause the hotel to be destroyed, but the sinners realize they don’t have to make hell a terrible place. They see how much hard work the princess put in for them. Thus, the rebuilt, higher quality, hotel being built. A symbolic building of how you can enjoy your afterlife no matter where you go. The start of season two will probably handle what is going to happen now that Hell knows they can fight back (and in fact, almost win) against Heaven. I have a feeling this will be a war more delved into in later seasons. (Just a quick side tangent: the fact that the whole season of Hazbin Hotel is supposedly one year which is mind boggling. That is a whole year in eight episodes. Good Omens did something similar, but that was with almost hour long episodes. If Hazbin hotel’s episodes are a flat thirty minutes or more I’ll just be flabbergasted. Also I don't think anyone in the hotel will be dying until season three.) That's all for now, What do you think? Stay Tuned!
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randombush3 · 1 year
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Sunday Morning
florence pugh x footballer!reader
summary: based off the Maroon 5 song ‘Sunday Morning’
words: 1470
warnings: gets a little bit angsty
notes: just a little in-between-er while i work on the lengthier, juicier stuff. And absolutely NOT proofread x
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This is rare.
Waking up to a bed with both of you in it. Not needing to attack the day ahead. Being allowed to listen to the rain falling, softly beating against the windows of your bedroom.
Sunday mornings like this are so special.
You yawn as you slowly open your eyes, skin prickling. Expecting it but feeling betrayed nonetheless, you glance at where the covers should be, knowing they’re bundled around your girlfriend because she gets so cold during the night ever since you developed that habit of rolling over in your sleep. You steal what’s yours back, not waking her but not minding if she stirs. She makes a quiet noise as your cooler skin slots beside her furnace, but this is the only sign of life.
Clouds shroud the light that briefly illuminated the bedroom, and you drift off once again, this time, with your girlfriend twisting to fit the mould you are in, burying her face between the pillows and your arm.
You struggle to remember the last time you woke up like this. You don’t live here half the time, having to find ways to split time between football and actually having a life. Things just get so crazy, and living the life you have built with Flo gets hard to do. She knows you try, and is also to blame when it comes to the lack of occupation your shared apartment has at times.
Every plane ticket you buy to lengthen the distance is bought because you will gladly hit the road, get up and go, if it means that someday you will be led back to her. You can leave easily because you know you will be coming back, and you know that when you head on a flight bound for wherever she is, you are returning home.
Thinking back to the week you’ve had — the tears you’ve shed, the stress, the pain — this may have been all you needed. To hold her again. To love her and to touch her. After all, in the darkness, she is all you see. The light at the end of a tunnel, the encapsulating warmth that draws patterns over your skin and marks you as hers and only hers forever. The happy ending to a horrific seven days.
Your musings must have woken her. Maybe you were thinking too loud.
She murmurs something unintelligible, eyes half-open but indefinitely looking at you. Then, louder, she brushes her hand over your hip, touch feather-light and careful, saying your name wistfully. You are quickly reminded that this day-off has come about due to a fractured ankle, a pang of grief stabbing into your heart like a blunt knife, forced through. You’ve been allowed three days to process and make sure you’re in the correct mental state to even begin recovery. She held you last night while you cried, and asks you again how you are feeling.It is a question commonly used in your relationship, but packs more meaning right now. There are a lot of feelings, obviously.
“I want to do something today,” you reply quietly, not needing to raise your voice barely above a whisper. Such is the tranquillity of two women alone in bed together. (Unless you happen to be doing something else — then forget that statement.) “So I don’t become a lump on the sofa.”
She chuckles, shaking her head. “Rest your bones with me right now,” she whispers, amusement not hidden at all. “And then why don’t we go for brunch later on?”
“Yeah, okay,” you mumble, disappointed once more by the restrictions in place. You don’t bring your crutches into the bedroom for fear they’ll haunt you while you dream. “I can drive us to that place in Greenwich. I’ll go slowly.” It’s a desperate attempt.
Her reply is instantaneous. “Absolutely not.” The attempt fails like it inevitably would. “Can we watch TV? I’ll grab your crutches.” And with that, you start hobbling away to the kitchen to prove you can move on your own, and get tricked into making her coffee. You never want to leave.
Three weeks later, she visits you in Barcelona. Your apartment here is your own, empty of things that smell like her. She changes that quickly, taking over every surface with things she somehow managed to fit in her suitcase, spreading out her shit until you can barely find your toothbrush. You know that brands send her their products to try, but don’t hesitate to remind her she doesn’t have to actually use them. You’re sure your bathroom cabinet might fall off the wall with how full it is.
It’s Sunday again, the fourth day of her trip, but the first day of doing nothing. There's quite a bit to do and see in the city, and she’s forced you to show her around. You get a lie in today because the girls have a game later. You can’t play for another four weeks at the very least, but have promised to watch and support them. Even if the thought of playing still makes your fists clench and your breath hitch. How are you supposed to not do what you were born to do? It’s your destiny, your fate, and a stupid ankle shouldn’t have gotten in the way of that. (But it did.)
“Morning,” she says, blinking in order to adjust her eyes to the light pouring through the blinds. “What time is it?”
You shrug, unable to check because your girlfriend is on top of you and your phone is too far away. “I know that you said you didn’t want to—”
“I recall you agreeing,” she interrupts indignantly.
“Right.” You smile. “I’m really feeling much better; my ankle doesn’t even hurt. So… we can—you know?”
“Feeling frisky?” she teases, sitting up, straddling you. Your fingers trace her every outline, feeling like artwork. Irreplaceable. You would definitely hang her up in a museum. (If she were a painted picture, not a person. No — that would be unethical.)
Flo leans down and brushes her lips against yours, half expecting you to have teeth waiting there for her. You take it slowly at first, however, aware of how big a lie your update on your ankle is.
You’re interrupted by the buzz of the bell at the entrance. Lucy and Keira are asking to be let up, considering they don’t have to start preparing for another two hours. They know Flo’s round, which typically means to leave you the fuck alone, but Lucy says she brought coffees and wants to talk to her favourite person. It makes you and Keira both feel amazing when the person she means is Flo. Really amazing.
With a sigh, you let them up, and enjoy the rest of the day in the shadow of your girlfriend.
Then, when Flo flies back to England and you’re left alone, you suddenly feel out of place and unwanted. It seems the one good thing about you — football — has been snuffed out with a small breath, and there is a crushing weight on your chest all the time. Maybe it has been there all along. Maybe Flo helps you not to notice.
With her gone, all you can do is notice. It consumes you to the point where you stop charging your phone and leaving your flat and attending your recovery sessions. It’s flagged up immediately by the club, who can fix the work-related problems, but you don’t tell anyone about the radio-silence Flo is on the other end of. The poor woman has to reach out to your friends to make sure you’re alive.
After a week, you send her a text; a brief hello. She responds quickly, and you reply hours later. She doesn’t text back for a day. And then you sway back and forth like branches in a storm, stable and unsteady. The weather changes, and you’re still together when the storm ends.
The arguments happen while you are in separate countries, and end within two weeks. The next time you see her, you’ve been on good terms, though some wounds are still fresh. Flo knows that you are going through a time where living is becoming increasingly harder to do, especially since your recovery period has been extended due to your blip in attendance.
Currently, you’re waiting for your plane to taxi onto the runway. It’s raining in Barcelona and you’re not supposed to have any time off, but as you stare out through the glass oval of a window, you swear you catch a glimpse of Flo in the reflection. It’s Sunday morning, and the sun hasn’t risen yet, and you’re hoping your heartbeat emits a signal for Flo. Something that sings ‘I’m coming back to you’. You will always find a way to bring yourself back to her.
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