#i think it was a decent reaction- probably better than what mom's is going to be

[eufezco]

you meet joel again after the outbreak and he finds out you have a daughter

seeing joel again after the outbreak was something you thought would never happen, but there he was, twenty years later, with almost completely gray hair and beard, and looking more tired than he used to. his brown eyes shone when he saw you, thinking that you were some sort of hallucination produced by tiredness, but your arms hugging his neck felt so tight and your head against his chest felt too real to be a creation of his mind.

he gulped nervously and took a few steps backward when you took the little girl in your arms as if he was scared of the little human. you had always been very good with children so he wasn't surprised that you were now taking care of them in jackson. because that's what it was, wasn't it? you were looking after someone's child, right?

"this- this is my daughter, joel." oh shit. your face expressed concern, waiting for a reaction from the man in front of you, but his eyes were locked on the child in your arms. he should have guessed. enough time passed, you were a grown woman and life was good in jackson, probably the best place on earth right now to start a family. he softly nodded his head, trying not to show how shocked he was. the baby was sucking on her finger, cooing and doing that stupid baby sounds like she was mocking him. "congrats" was all he could say.

he was waiting for you to introduce him to the father of your daughter, but you never did, it was as if you were torturing him slowly. maria wanted to put joel and ellie in the house across the street from hers and tommy's, but you offered them to stay with you.

"oh, that place has been untouched since the outbreak, i actually think only the heat works." you cut tommy off when he was saying that it was decent. joel was gonna decline your offer but ellie, who had been tickling your daughter's belly and playing with her tiny hands until that moment, was quicker than him on saying that they'd love to.

he hated to see that baby. joel hated her chubby cheeks and her small hands trying to reach for him every time he was near. he also hated tripping over her toys around the house and how she cutely laughed when ellie played with her. he hated seeing her wrapped in a towel like a burrito after her bath and he hated to see her cheeks and nose red from the cold weather, and how she stomped when she was wearing her big coat and fell on her ass in the snow.

"so, where's the dad?" ellie asked you with her mouth full of food. joel gave her a look that would have killed her and huffed. there was truly no way this kid was shutting the fuck up. "you don't have to -" "no, it's fine." you assured joel while making sure that your daughter was liking her food. you threw a glance at joel to see his reaction and he was looking at you with his face more relaxed than usual. his brow was not furrowed and his eyebrows were arched, trying not to show how interested he was in your answer but at the same time very annoyed because of ellie being so nosy. "he left." "shit- i'm sorry." you shook your head. "it was before she was born. it's better this way, you know? if he was gonna be a shitty dad, i prefer him not to be around." "hell yeah. fuck him." ellie said while nodding her head in agreement with what you were saying. joel threw another deadly glance at ellie after she cursed in front of you and your kid. " i bet you are the coolest mom, right joel?" ellie's words made you giggle but you were also waiting for joel's answer. it was easy for him to empathize with you since you were going through the same thing he went through with sarah. he found it very easy to be a single parent. sarah was the best kid and he had you and tommy to help him. but you were alone, you lived alone, you had to go to work, and you had to take care of your daughter. he clenched his jaw. "that's right."

when you showed them your house, ellie loved it. she lay down on your couch, she opened your fridge, she sat in front of the fireplace, she turned the lights on and off multiple times, checking that they were indeed working. joel told her to stop but you assured him that it was okay, you liked seeing the girl so excited over such small things.

joel on the other hand was static next to you while ellie played around. your daughter was looking at him with her head resting on your shoulder, and joel looked at her from time to time only to find that the baby was still staring at him.

you showed them the rest of the house. ellie had her own room, which was meant to be your daughter's future room but she could have it, and you would share your room with joel. but after seeing his face, you thought it might have been a better idea to offer him the guest room.

"we also have a guest room. there's no bed but there's a couch and the heat doesn't work there but if you want-" "oh no, old joel will be great here." ellie appeared behind him, giving a few pats on his shoulder. you smiled at the girl but waited for an answer from joel. he was trying so hard to ignore the crib next to your side of the bed and how the little girl was sitting in the middle of the mattress, playing with her stupid little toys and violently sucking on her pacifier. instead of that, he decided to remember all those nights sleeping with ellie either in the woods or in the car, and the way he could hardly move when he woke up the next day because his body ached so much. but joel also remembered how good it felt being your little spoon and waking up next to you. of course, he didn't expect things to be like they used to be, but probably sleeping next to you was the only thing he had left of what once was his home. "this is okay." "great! and it's not as if we haven't slept together before, so..." you added trying to downplay the issue. "woow." ellie was so interested in this. "how is that?" "no-" "we were neighbors, and sometimes we-" "enough."

you knew why joel was so distant with your daughter. meanwhile, ellie loved to be around her, joel tried as hard as he could to keep his distance. you lived next to them and in the afternoons you helped sarah with her homework. you stayed with them for dinner and then enjoyed a movie or played some board games with them. the night the outbreak started, joel knocked on your door and told you to go inside his truck immediately. you were familiar with the relationship joel had with his daughter and you knew what a shock it had been to lose her. that's why you didn't blame him for his behavior.

"is she okay?" joel asked you half asleep and you hummed in response. "she's just hungry. i'm sorry. you can go back to sleep." you sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing the sleep of your eyes and picking her up in your arms. you mumbled something to her and kissed her forehead while you started to softly rock her in your arms. "no. how can i- how can i help?" joel sat on the bed and waited, noticing how she calmed down after you took her in your arms. the light coming from the street illuminated your silhouette and allowed Joel to appreciate your daughter's wet face. "hm- i need her bottle. it's ready in the kitchen. if you could heat it in the microwave for like a minute, that would be great." while he waited, he couldn't help but think of baby sarah in his arms. her cheeks were wet and her eyes were wide open, joel had to leave early in the morning for work but he didn't mind staying with her up all night if it was necessary. joel was trying to distract her until her bottle was ready, letting her small fingers wrap around his big one. joel had to take a few seconds before going back to the room with you, his hand pressed against his chest trying to control his breathing. once he came back with the baby's bottle, he sat by your side, handing it over to you and nodding after you thanked him. he watched as she enjoyed her meal and as you softly rocked her in your arms. your head fell on joel's shoulder and he didn't know what to do so he just stayed with you like that until you finished feeding her.

"i'm late. i'll see you at lunchtime." you couldn't be late another time, maria will literally kill you. you placed your daughter in joel's arms before you could remember how hesitant he had been with her and he had no other choice but to hold her so she wouldn't fall.

"are you okay? do you want me to take her?" ellie asked after seeing joel's shocked face. he held the little girl with outstretched arms, keeping her away from him. the baby cooed and extended her arms wanting to reach joel. she opened and closed her fist, getting really impatient and starting to make sounds of discomfort. the man frowned and had no other choice but to hold her against his chest. "shit... well done, joel. look, she even seems to like you." ellie added when the girl hid her face in joel's neck.

a few days after that he seemed to be closer to your daughter, you even caught him playing with her rattle, your daughter lying in her crib and with her arms up in the air trying to reach the toy. he was serious, not allowing himself to show how he really felt. your baby laughed with him and you decided to leave the room carefully to not interrupt the moment.

he started with small things like letting her hold his thumb between her fist every time he noticed she was staring into his soul again, and always keeping an eye on her when ellie was helping her to walk in the snow in case she fell or got tired of trying. then joel started feeding her, cutting the fruit into very small pieces, making sure that the milk wasn't too hot or too cold. at first, just sitting by your side but she was too distracted by his presence to eat so he had to start feeding her eventually.

you sighed in exhaustion once you entered your house. "i'm so tired." you sighed again and rested your head on joel's shoulder. your baby was half asleep on joel's arm, visibly comfortable by the way she cooed every now and then and by the way she rubbed her face against his arm. joel was rocking her softly. using one finger you tickled her belly to let her know that you were home. he put her in her pajamas, fed her dinner and you would even say that he had bathed her by the way her little curls were still damp. "she likes you." you said. he brought the pacifier to her mouth and with closed eyes, she quickly caught it with her lips. "she likes you more than me." "that's not true." joel spoke with a low voice, being careful not to be too rough and wake the child up. he turned his head to look at you, his eyes finally leaving your daughter to pay attention to you. you also looked at him with your head still resting on his shoulder. "you like her more than me." you pouted, trying to stay focused on his deep brown eyes and not on his lips and how close his mouth was to your face. "also not true." you smirked and moved one of your hands to play with your daughter's. she squeezed your index finger tightly between her tiny fist while joel kept looking at you. all that you had now should have been with him. your daughter, your house, your life. before the outbreak happened, one night drinking a few glasses of wine at his house after sarah went to sleep, you told him what you hoped your life would be like. you wanted to find your person and maybe even get married, you wanted to travel, moved in with them, start a family, raise your children, have movie nights. not much different from what you had with him at that time. you were almost there, touching your dreamed life with your fingertips, if you only had more time... when joel realized, your eyes were on him again and you had his chin between your thumb and index finger. your thumb brushed his lower lip, testing the waters, and his eyes slowly closed. you understood that as a green light to continue so, you leaned towards him and pressed your lips against his. just like that, no need to move them or rush things. you just missed feeling his lips against yours as much as he did. the kiss lasted ten seconds at most, but it was enough time for your breaths to mix and for joel's body to truly relax after months. you showed a little smile to him after the kiss and the soft look on his face let you know that he was satisfied. you went in for another kiss and he had his eyes closed already but then all of a sudden, your daughter on joel's arm started crying. "oh, i think someone's jealous."

#joel miller #joel miller smut #joel miller angst #joel miller fluff #joel miller imagine #joel miller x reader #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x f!reader #tlou #tlou fluff #tlou smut #tlou angst #tlou imagine #tlou x reader #tlou x you #pedro pascal #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal fluff #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x female reader #pedro pascal x y/n #the last of us #the last of us fluff #the last of us smut #the last of us x reader #the last of us imagine

[slxsherwriter]

Not so Quiet Town

Fandom: Old 37/Bill Moseley characters

Pairing: Darryl x female reader

Word Count: 2,614

Warnings: Mentions of murder

A/N: I rewrote this twice and am still unsure of the ending. Basically, I wanted to play on the duality of Darryl's character. I think there was a genuine attempt at a date with the mother before realizing what exactly it was he thought he was seeing. So, why not? Is soft his default? No, I don't believe so, but I think he is capable and even more so given the circumstances I threw in here. Hopefully, you enjoy!

Watching the elderly woman struggle to get the groceries into the car, you noticed that no one else was giving two shits, stepping up to help. Well, that just wouldn't do. You tossed the two bags that you were carrying into your truck before jogging over to where her car was. It was clear that she had some difficulty moving, given her age probably some arthritis at the minimum.

"Can I help you get those into the car, ma'am?" She startled a bit, which made you happy that you had kept a respectful distance between you still. There were plenty of people that would take offence to the offer of help, especially around here, a small town were most were used to providing for themselves. If she said no, you would back off.

"That is very kind of you dear. If You don't mind." You offered her a smile, still waiting to step forward, not wanting to crowd her.

"Not at all." When she stepped back, that was your cue to move forward. Carefully, you began to load the car. There was more than you expected but you knew better than to question. You had no idea of her situation. Nor did you have any right to inquire. Just as you got the last bag into the car, an angry sounding voice called out.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing?" It was your turn to be startled, almost stumbling back from the car before you caught your balance. The look on the face of the man approaching the car matched the anger in his voice. Immediately, your hands shot up in an innocent gesture. Admittedly, that was more the reaction that you had been expecting.

"I was just…" Before you could finish your explanation, you were cut off by the woman that you had just helped.

"Calm down, Darryl. This nice young lady was just helping me get the groceries in the car while you finished up. She's been nothing but polite and helpful." As she spoke and reassured the man that everything was okay, some tension leaked from his frame. He still looked distrusting, but he wasn't about to physically approach anymore. A fact that you were thankful for. A fight in the grocery store parking lot was the last thing that was needed. No good deed went unpunished.

"I didn't mean any harm. I saw that she was having a hard time getting the bags in the car and thought I would offer my help. Didn't do anything until she gave me the okay."

"Go on and get in the car, Mom." Ah, okay that explained the man's protective nature. You stepped back further, offering a soft smile.

"Thank you very much, dear."

"You're welcome." She shifted around the car slowly to be able to get in. It left the two of you in a slightly awkward silence. "I'll just get going…"

"Thank you," he sighed out. It caught you off guard. Being thanked was not what you expected. Giving a small shake of your head, you were quick to assure him.

"It was really no big deal. No one else was stepping up to help, and it looked like your eggs were about to hit the floor."

"You're new around here, aren't you." That wasn't the first time that you had heard that this week alone.

"It's that obvious, is it?" You held out your hand for the man, giving your name since you already had the advantage of knowing his.

" Well, thank you again. I'm sure we will see you around."

***********

While the town itself was decently large, most of it was more rural, so the population wasn't all that big. That resulted in you running into both Darryl and Martha a few times over the next few weeks as you settled in. Each time, a friendly conversation was struck. Darryl became increasingly more relaxed at each interaction, even going so far as giving you a friendly and welcoming smile the last few interactions. 

There were some whispers around town, but you hardly paid attention to them. If every person was judged by their past, well, everyone would be screwed. What mattered was how he acted now, mainly how he acted with you. 

The brash and aggressive personality was certainly there, though not as upfront as it had been in that first meeting. He loosened up further as you spent time helping out his mother, who had taken a shine to you. Mainly through some volunteer work that you were doing at the church. Martha had recognized you and instantly seemed to latch onto you. Not that you minded. She was kind. A woman of faith where you had lost yours. She didn't judge and simply was happy for some companionship and help outside of her family. 

Of course, you weren't quite aware of the way that she watched you interact with her son or the way that a bit of happiness sparked in her when she was present for those meetings. 

It had gotten to the point that Darryl trusted you enough to pick her up from the salvage yard, where they also lived. It had become almost routine. You would pick Martha up on Sunday mornings for her church service and then a little afternoon lunch and outing. Sunday mornings turned into another three outings throughout the weekend. Always scheduled and never random but that worked for you. 

Darryl had taken to greeting you at the entrance to the yard, the two of you chatting about this, and that, nothing specifically as Martha made her way down. You enjoyed the time with the older woman, but you had to admit that you began to really look forward to the chats between the two of you. It really came as no surprise when he finally asked you out for a coffee.

Coffee turned into dinners, dinners into late night drives with stargazing. Random talks turned a little more serious. Neither of you talked about the past, focused only on the future. There was a soft side to the man that you were privileged to see. A side that you found yourself liking more and more. It was easy, and he seemed to appreciate that you didn't expect anything of him besides some respect and time to enjoy one another.

**********************************

Two months had passed, and things couldn't have been looking better for you. There was an easy routine that allowed for the stability that you had been seeking. Volunteer work, spending time helping Martha, dates with Darryl, and working in the small home that you had purchased kept you plenty busy. In a good way.

It was comfortable enough that you didn't recognize the signs of being followed. For the past week, something had seemed off, but it was nothing that pulled too hard at the front of your mind. You simply brushed the feeling off as a result of the recurring nightmare that had played you for the week, which had led to a distinct lack of sleep. Anything else seemed silly and never entered your conscious thoughts. Darryl had noticed something, making a comment on it during your date two nights ago. You had promised him it was simply from you not sleeping well, not wanting to go into detail on what the nightmare was about.

Maybe you should have. Maybe offloading would have helped ease some of the tension and help stop the nightmare. That would have let you sleep better, which in turn may have let you spot the car that had been following you to the salvage yard. Just as you pulled up to the entrance, lights flashed behind you.

"You've got to be kidding me." A cop really decided to pull you over? You hadn't been speeding, and you knew for certain that nothing was wrong with the truck. Scrubbing a hand down your face, you looked behind you and frowned. It was an unmarked car. Now that was unusual, and you could feel the hairs on the back of your neck standing. Something was wrong. That was an instinct you had learned to trust a long time ago. Still, you remained in your car and as relaxed as possible. There were no cameras at the front of the yard. Which meant that Darryl or Jon Roy would have no idea what was going on.

With the window already down, you were getting ready to ask what was wrong, but you were never given the chance. A large hand reached through the window, grabbing the back of your neck and slamming your head forward. Pain blossomed outward from your nose, and your ears were ringing almost immediately. The action stunned you long enough for the man to pull you from the car, one arm wrapped around your torso before cold metal was pressed to your temple. Your head was clearing enough for you to realize that. You could feel the blood leaking down from your busted nose. That was going to be a bitch come tomorrow.

"This is how this is going to go. You are going to get this gate open, and then we are going to find the two degenerates that run this place. The ones that killed my daughter." Killed his daughter? What the hell was this man going on about? You didn't have any choice besides to play along. You just hoped that Darryl or Jon Roy would be around, see what was happening and get help. "Anything I don't like, I put a bullet in your brain. Do you understand?" 

'I understand." Your mind was racing to figure out how you could get out of the situation. If he hadn't gotten the jump on you, you may have been in a better position. Reaching into your pocket carefully, you produced the key that Martha had given you. You shuffled forward, the man still pressed against your back. As long ashedidn't check your hip…

Getting in was easy. But there still hadn't been an opportunity that presented itself for you to try and get away or gain an upper hand.

"Come on out you sick fucks! I know you are here. You wanna take away something of mine, then I'm gonna take away something of yours." The gun was pressed harder against your head Enough so, you were forced to tilt to accommodate the pressure with gritted teeth. As your eyes jumped around, you didn't spot either of the boys.

"Woah, woah, woah. What's going on here?" That was Darryl. After a second, his form appeared from around a nearly junked car. His hands were in the air, though that anger that you didn't often see anymore, was so clearly present.

"Don't play dumb, asshole. You may have others fooled, but I'm not. Once a twisted fucker, always one. That record of yours was easy to pull up. And all the missing people along this stretch of road? I don't know how anyone didn't put it together sooner. You and that deformed brother of yours are behind it all."

"Listen, I don't know what you think you know, but you got it all wrong. I haven't been in trouble since I got out…"

"I tracked her phone here! I know she was here. The last place that she ever came. " Darryl was doing a good job of distracting the man. It was now a question where Jon Roy was. Something that the man was acutely aware of, unfortunately. "Where is your brother?" 

"I'm not his keeper. How the hell should I know where he is?" You subtly tried to shift your lower half away from the man. Creating a little space would give you the chance to throw a blow or slip from his grasp. Either would work right now.

"Bullshit. He doesn't show himself in the next fifteen seconds, I'm shooting her now. Then I'll shoot you." With the underlying hint of something in his voice, that unhinged nature, you actually believed that he would do that. So, there was no time to waste. 

"You know, if you were coming here, guns blazing, I would have thought that you would have had a slightly better plan than this. Really it's a shit attempt at trying to get what you want. Two on one, the odds weren't ever in your favor." The man behind you let out a cry. There was little time to react before your balance was thrown forward, though his grip didn't exactly leave you. Cursing, you tried to twist out of the hold as the man swung around. The loud crack of gunfire echoed out. Ithad been aimed at Jon Roy, who wasn't hit and tried taking another whack at the man. The momentum was something that you tried to take advantage of, toring to continue the motion through. Managing, you broke free, but stumbled in the process.The gun was aimed at you this time. it was only that continued motion of the stumble that the shot missed your chest and caught your arm.

"Fuck!" It sent you to the ground. The sound of rushing footsteps came, likely signalling that Darryl had moved forward. He still had the gun though, which put the brothers at a disadvantage. Rolling to your back, your good hand patted your side in a near frantic motion. Don't panic. It was the only thing running through your head. Finding the handle of your own gun, the action was all but muscle memory, practiced ease before the trigger was pulled.

Both Jon Roy and Darryl jumped back as the man's body hit the ground.

"Son of a bitch!" With a heaving breath, your head hit the ground. Between the throbbing, pulsing pain the gunshot wound in your arm and the slightly less sharp pain in your face, You couldn't be bothered by the reactions. 

"Is he dead?" You would need to get the bullet out of your shoulder. Hopefully, the two would be able to help you with that.

"Don't think there is a doubt about that." There was a moment of silence. Then Darryl was standing over you. There was that hard look still on his face. He went to open his mouth but you cut him off.

"Good. Now, can you help me up and help me get this damn bullet out of my shoulder?" This could turn into a proper nightmare. If what the man said was true though, maybe there was another path to travel. After another second, an almost disbelieving laugh came from him.

"You serious?"

"Darryl, I have a bullet in my damn arm. Yes, I'm serious. I can dig it out but I will need some help." He knelt down, an arm going underneath your shoulders to help you getup into a seated position.

"You just shut someone dead and you're more concerned with that?" Distrusting. That was what his tone was. Something you hadn't heard in the past two months. 

"It's not the first person that I've shot and killed. Frankly, the bullet is my first priority. The second will be figuring that shit out so nothing comes back on you and your family." His arm tightened around your shoulder but it wasn't from anger or distrust. That was far more the comforting touch that you had come to expect.

"Let's get you up on your feet. Jon Roy's got him." There was confirmation. Clutching your arm, you got to your feet with his help. "So, not the first person you've killed?" Was that a hint of pride in his voice? Seemed that quiet wasn't quite what you were going to have in this small town. At least not anymore.

***********************

Tag list: @run-rabbitt-run || @jackalopes-eat-bacon

#horror writing #slasher writing #bill moseley #slasher x reader #old 37 #bill moseley characters #darryl x reader #darryl old 37

[willowdied]

Meta + Stephanie and the idea of having kids—

oh boy. you ready for a long ramble? i have a lot of. thoughts.

being a parent is not something that really pops until steph's head until she has a pregnancy scare. in the several verses i have established with steph i have varying thoughts on when this particular scare happens, but she has one before her senior year of high school. she's safe and responsible, but one late period sends her into a crisis and she immediately stops and buys four tests on the way home. to say that the ten minutes of waiting she is having a crisis the whole time is an understatement, steph's brain trying her best to think about how she would be a parent, what she would do, where she would go. the relief that she felt seeing a very clear negative was strong, but the thought linger on what if should it have been positive. her father's reaction to those four tests in the garbage, despite the fact that all of them of one line on them was enough for her to solidify the fact that she shouldn't be a parent--- her one parent that she had was far from supportive and cared for nothing save for him image, meanwhile her mother had hit the road when steph was just three years old, leaving both her only child and her husband behind. regardless of circumstances, what sort of mother would she be based on her example? she had no direction in her life, she had no idea what she would be doing out of high school- what could she offer to a child?

in verses where she has people around her who have kids and she gets to be around them, for a moment, steph is a little antsy at first but very quickly she starts to entertain the idea of maybe she would be a decent mom. she is in no rush though.

the worry and thought had never really left her head and when she's older, out of high school, probably out of college with a degree to her name, and maybe even a whole new last name, when it comes to taking another test again and there is two lines waiting for her it scares her a little, and it for sure is not planned, but she has a little more faith in herself and a lot more faith in her partner ( which im just going to say pete for this because i am in fact. lautski trash ) . the worry sits in the corner of her mind, but she also grows this determination to do better, to give more than what her parents had not. it's far from planned and she still is nervous but she gets more and more excited about it.

and with that in mind, after having a first, determined to make sure this kid does not feel alone, like she felt, despite knowing they will do ten times better, and knowing how pete has a brother and knows a bit about that she very quickly brings up the idea of having another that is a little more planned.

tldr it's a lot of fear and doubt in herself till she gets there or around people who have kids or with time and figuring out herself and working through uh. her childhood, and an accident happens and she slowly but surely gets excited to being to be a mom.

#hi this is a very edited down meta i have big emotions AND could have rambled on and on about all the things but tried to Focus #thank you for sending letting me ramble a little on some of them :') #steph being a mother ONE DAY :') is so important to me #but hi yeah the way steph has an Oh Wait Maybe Having Kids Would Be Nice when temma has kida that's it that's all thanks #but also she is such a good aunt;;; and is so. excited for them;; #( stephanie ~ headcanons ) #snaptwice #teen pregnancy tw #pregnancy tw

[mermaidsirennikita]

Would you rec HR with the hero being a Duke? I haven't really read many good ones

Sure!

Waking Up with The Duke by Lorraine Heath--The "please get my wife pregnant because I'm impotent thanks bro" book. The hero is a duke, who's like this genteel type of lover type. Sleeps around a lot, keeps it classy with his affairs, is hopelessly in love with his best friend's wife. You know the drill.

When the Duke was Wicked by Lorraine Heath--This one has the "my wife and child died so now I'm a dissolute rake" duke, who agrees to teach his (decently younger, virginal) family friend how to select a good husband, only to start like, tonguefucking her in his office and stuff.

Daring and The Duke by Sarah MacLean--Evil duke! OR IS HE? Probably better to read the first two books in this series, each of which focuses on one of the duke's brothers.

Duke of Sin by Elizabeth Hoyt--cRaZy duke! People think everyone is exaggerating about how insane this guy is. They aren't. He's fully batshit crazy and falls in love with his housekeeper whose every reaction is "this might as well happen".

Accidentally Compromising the Duke by Stacy Reid--As discussed previously, has a sad single father widower duke who cannot maintain any degree of chill around the heroine, despite "only wanting a stepmother for his daughters". Sure bro!

The Return of the Duke by Lorraine Heath--He's not actively a duke, but he's trying to regain his title as it as taken from the family after his father was convicted of trying to murder Queen Victoria. So there's a lot of like, duke identity crises.

My Dirty Duke by Joanna Shupe--A novella, and not for the faint of heart, but oh so worth it. The hero is like.... 18 to 20. The hero is her father's best friend. Please, I'm begging to be canceled for this.

The Chasing of Eleanor Vane by Sierra Simone--Another duke age gap romance. The heroine is engaged to the hero's nephew. Both leads are bisexual. A novella.

An Education in Pleasure by Eva Leigh--The hero is a young (early twenties) duke and the heroine is a good bit older than him and teaches him about sex.

Any Duchess Will Do by Tessa Dare--A fun duke! A slutty duke who says he'll marry the random barmaid in order to make his mom happy, except his mom GOES WITH IT. So many courtesy titles for this duke, so little time to recite them while he's got her bent over a desk.

The Duchess Deal by Tessa Dare--A scarred duke! So ugly! So mean! Marries the heroine so that he can get an heir, but the procreative sex quickly becomes just. Like. Hardcore fucking.

How to Love A Duke in Ten Days by Kerrigan Byrne--Scarred duke, but much darker. Traumatized (from past sexual assault) heroine who needs to marry someone in order to escape her blackmailer. Very emotional romance between two wounded people.

Heartbreaker by Sarah MacLean (out 8/23)--DADDY DUKE. Very stern, will smack that ass and pull that hair. But like. How gentlemanly.

The Duke Gets Even by Joanna Shupe--Not out until January, but this is my reminder that everyone should read the Rogues of Fifth Avenue series, in part because they're all good and in part because you get periodic appearances from this duke, the Duke of Fuckwood Lockwood, a man who gets cucked twice (so far) but keeps going because his dick is just that big.

What I Did for A Duke by Julie Anne Long--A vengeful duke! Gets cucked and decides to ruin the cucker's little sister, only for her to be like "this is a pretty obvious plot on your part" and charm him completely. Age gap; she's about 20 and he's 39/40.

After Dark with the Duke by Julie Anne Long--Another age gap duke (42 to her 25) who falls in love with an opera singer who annoys him with her scandalous nature and incredible hotness.

The Duchess Hunt by Lorraine Heath--Workplace daddy duke! Falls in love with his Girl Friday/secretary as she tries to help him find a wife. Big Tony/Pepper vibes if you've seen... any Iron Man movie. Includes the patented Lorraine Heath "ride me" moment.

Duke of Midnight by Elizabeth Hoyt--Another wackadoodle Hoyt duke. Georgian Batman duke, vigilante by night, fuck machine also by night, the man never sleeps.

The Duke with the Dragon Tattoo by Kerrigan Byrne--River pirate duke! Kills the heroine's evil brother and evil groom on her wedding day and spirits her away! There is a scene where she says they aren't married and he basically goes "maritime law" and I do laugh very hard when I read it.

Her Night with The Duke by Diana Quincy--"Oops" duke, who finds out that the woman he had a passionate one night stand with is actually the stepmother of the woman he's courting. We all make mistakes, even dukes.

The Courtesan Duchess by Joanna Shupe--"Mistakes have been made" duke who leaves his wife after the wedding to go fuck around in Europe for like, 6-8 years. But she needs a son to fend off the people coming after her financially, so she relies on his incredible himbo nature and disguises herself as a courtesan in order to get pregnant. Please get a better memory, duke.

The Duke I Tempted by Scarlett Peckham--"Whips and chains excite me" duke, but actually. A sexually submissive duke who has another big secret, but his primary big secret is the fact that he goes to see dominatrixes for punishment. WHAT WILL HIS WIFE SAY AND WILL SHE BE INTO IT??? WHO'S TO SAY.

Anthologies:

Duke I'd Like to F...--Includes the novellas I mentioned above plus a couple more good ones.

Big Duke Energy--Have not read this one, but it has good authors involved and I will read it.

#romance novel blogging #book recs

[bluesadansey]

☕️ + crazy ex girlfriend’s 4th season

I think overall I like season 4 as a concluding season for the show, certainly compared to a lot of other concluding seasons of shows I love it does a better job at what it sets out to do and that makes me I think more inclined to be generous with it (I’m used to really really hating the conclusions of things I love tbh because they can go so wrong, so when something is decent I think I’m easier on it than I would be if the same thing was in an earlier installment). I overall like what the season does with concluding Rebecca’s arc, there are places where I think it could be stronger (particularly the aspect of the season that’s supposed to be about Rebecca confronting her own privilege/white feminism doesn’t succeed as much as it thinks it does imo, but that also is part of the largest overall issue I have with the season which I’ll get into later) but other parts I think it succeeds with beautifully (I love the arc with Rebecca and her little brother, the final scenes with her mom this season, the realizations she comes to in the finale etc.), and I think Paula’s arc comes to a basically flawless conclusion. 

My biggest gripe with the season is in the treatment of WoC in the season. Particularly Valencia and Heather’s (who would be my second and third favorite chars on the show after Rebecca respectively) character arcs are so neglected compared to Rebecca Paula’s even Darryl’s even NATHANIEL’s and it makes me sad

:(. I’ve talked about this before but I really don’t care for the writers decision to treat Valencia’s sexuality in such a throwaway way rather than being willing to explore her feelings about it the way they did with Darryl. Her and Beth’s storyline being all about Valencia wanting to get married… it just does not work for me at all. I’ve seen justifications that the reason the writers approach Valencia differently is that she’s a different character who wouldn’t be into coming out with a song the way a character like Darryl would but like, these are written characters the writers are making those decisions… and there are so many ways you can explore a character’s sexuality that are unique to the character, that just seems like such a lame excuse to me. I have more unfavorable things to say about this take but I don’t want to get off topic, basically I feel like Valencia was majorly cheated out of her own arc in s4 and it is my biggest sticking point with the season, ngl partly because Valencia’s a character I actually identified with quite a bit so there’s bias at play there too even if I stand by my reactions. I don’t have a rant for Heather the way I do for Valencia but if I’d rewatched more recently I definitely would, some of the issues with Heather’s storyline do stem from the end of s3 (I sort of wish the surrogacy storyline had never happened). Even though I did like Paula’s storyline re: the women in the prison Rebecca was at those storylines had a lot of problems. And I think seeing how much room the writers were willing to give Nathaniel’s arc and place in the narrative vs Valencia and Heather was also really disheartening to me, and I don’t particularly like Nathaniel so that does effect my relationship with those choices but I think even if I had much more of an affinity for his character than I do, it would still be revealing of the writers priorities to me and not in a good way. 

I don’t mind the meta-ness of the season but that’s probably because I’m more inclined to like that type of humor than a lot of people, I get why others had complaints about it. Idk what else I have to say about the season really? The songs aren’t as good as earlier seasons but the ones that slap (particularly Love’s A Game and Hello Nice To Meet You) were bangers imo. oh and I LOVE the Halloween episode, it actually has many beats designed specifically for my enjoyment and unlike many other episodes I did like Valencia and Heather’s roles in it a lot.

thanks for the ask!

(send me a ☕️ + a topic and I’ll give you my honest opinion of it!)

#s speaks #crazy ex girlfriend #asks #catty-words #ceg #I would have more coherent thoughts if I’d rewatched more recently! #mutuals #my meta

[un-pearable]

I HAVE RETURNED WITH SEASON 11 THOUGHTS. yes. i finally stopped what was a completely unprompted several week long procrastination for no reason at all.

ok first things first: not a fan of the 11 minute episode format!!!! i want my b plots back!!!!!!! its not fine but whatever i'll survive. number two this season was a little all over the place and definitely couldve benefited from being two separate seasons just because the first and second halves are so entirely disconnected from each other but its not the end of the world.

it is now time to talk about one of my most favorite things about ninjago ever: namely, the COMPLETELY INCOMPREHENSIBLE TIMELINE. following in the footsteps of the last writers, whoever has taken the reigns this season has carried on the age old tradition of sticking dates onto the ninjago timeline that make it more convoluted than beforehand. its wonderful. its delightful. i dont think ive ever seen a messier timeline in any piece of media in my entire life. the timeline was broken from the literal beginning between lloyd's existence & wu's flashback to garmadon getting banished to the underworld or whatever and it Just Got Worse. (no for real that entire thing is so terribly funny its like. ok garmadon got banished to the underworld when they were both presumably young adults maybe (???) so logically lloyd had to have been born sometime around there but when we meet him lloyd is probably like somewhere from 8-13 years old and wu and garmadon and misako are Very Old. and its just. so funny. its so funny. THAT ASIDE)

so back to the latest edits to the timeline. evil snake lady claims that wu betrayed her thousands of years ago. so wu is thousands of years old, but is also presumably somewhere around kai and nya's parents' ages given that they all seemed to be young adults at the time. which was also in ancient ninjago times and also like 50 years ago max. does it make sense? no of course not its the ninjago timeline. it gets even better though, because we are now introduced to the concept that … allegedly. there was a tenuous peace that existed for millenia between the serpentine and humans pre-wu & garmadon almost screwing that over so bad. and we can reasonably assume that the serpentine were created along with the rest of ninjago, so …… did the fsm just create garmadon & wu a few thousand years after chilling out in ninjago for a while? who knows. least of all me.

actually speaking of the first spinjitzu master i want to complain for a minute because i hate this guy. frankly i dont think he was a very good dad. i dont even think he was a mediocre dad. in fact i think he was a pretty crappy parent. like. like okay evidence number one: look at his children. the amount of mental illness there is unreal. you cannot look at wu and garmadon and tell me that the fsm was any sort of decent at parenting. like… ok im 99.9% sure they did not have a mom, which would imply that the fsm created them himself. which would FURTHER imply that, for some completely and entirely incomprehensible reason, he gave garmadon mostly (??? im still really unclear on this but we've gone through that) oni blood and wu mostly (??? see above) dragon blood. instead of, yknow, giving them half and half. to get more clear: he specifically screwed over garmadon for no reason. also it should be noted that even after wu and garmadon have found out that the evil snake lady is evil and 10000% intends to use spinjitzu to kill everybody they still dont tell the fsm about any of it because they fear his reaction more than they do the consequences of this. they go behind his back and use an expressly forbidden technique to clean up this mess because, again, they fear his reaction more than any of the other consequences. i do not think he was a good parent at all.

back in like season 2 garmadon says that wu was always the fsm's favorite and honestly i believe it given whatever the heck is going on with their blood, but its quite unfortunate that even the favored son still got massively screwed over by the fsm because said fsm SUCKS and is a TERRIBLE PARENT. like at some undefined point prior to the anacondrai drama the fsm just up and leaves for no reason in particular and like. wow. the guy really did just make one of his sons evil by default and then when it got worse he ditched and and dumped the responsibility of cleaning that up onto his younger son, thereby forcing him to send his brother to hell and traumatizing him for life. okay. thanks first spinjitzu master. and if that wasnt enough he then drops back in 50000 years later to try to drag lloyd off to who knows where and then immediately ditches again. his entire lineage is just mental illness: the family. i dont think that the fsm was like. actively trying to be an atrocious parent or anything but i do firmly believe he was grossly neglecting his duties as a father and was in general incredibly distant and unhelpful and probably spent more time getting mad at his children than anything else. tldr i hate the first spinjitzu master. i hate him so much.

anyways lets talk about wu for a minute while we're on the topic. i think its incredibly interesting that he wanted to 1) turn himself into snake lady whose name escapes me at the moment despite the fact that its pretty clear she wouldnt have stopped at just getting back at him and 2) go by himself to save zane when he had absolutely no way of getting home and knew it. frankly i would not be surprised if there was some amount of suicidal ideation / martyr complex going on there. in other news i am SO delighted 1) we got a garmadon and wu flashback. huge win for tumblr user iratusmus and 2) wu got to be the bad influence this time because that is so terribly funny. i think wu should want to do things he's not allowed to do more often. i support it. also, tangentially related: i know john mulaney is cancelled now or whatever but this is really just wu in a nutshell

and since i've already mentioned him, lets go ahead and talk about zane for a minute. i am…….. honestly incredibly disappointed with ice emperor zane like. the biggest problem here is that they didnt really do anything interesting with it - its never really relevant that its zane specifically who has become the ice emperor outside of 1) elemental power and 2) so that we can turn him to our side. like… it doesnt really have any connection to his past or even like. okay earlier in the season while lloyd, nya, and zane are trying to steal the other forbidden scroll of spinjitzu (im going to talk about that briefly in a second but we'll hold off on it for a minute) they come across a mirror that shows the onlooker's worst fears - lloyd's is becoming lord garmadon, nya's is failure/never amounting to anything in life, and zane's is losing his humanity. so you'd think that in an arc where zane gets corrupted they'd try it play into that but…. no. because even if the ninjago writers are new, it wouldnt be ninjago if we didn't set up a million concepts that couldve been really interesting if they had been properly explored and then we drop all of that to take the most boring route humanly possible. thank you, ninjago writers.

brief commentary on the forbidden scrolls of spinjitzu: i am SO confused on 1) why the fsm wrote them down. like bestie if you, specifically, are the one who forbade this, WHY ARE YOU WRITING IT DOWN!!!!!!!!! I HATE YOU 2) how sticking them on a staff gives you an incredible amount of power. not even like. reading it or something. doing what it says on the writing. just the concept of holding it gives you power. hello ? 3) why it can banish people to the never realm if used in a certain way. they didnt even try to explain this one at all and im so confused about it. also, if it can banish people to the never realm, why cant it transport people across other realms? many questions, no answers.

ok back to this season's villains: lets talk about SNAKE LADY! in all honesty i dont have that much to say shes kinda a mid villain but at least shes a girlboss so i'll take what i can get. motivations are kind of lacking but whatever. i do really wish the writers would commit on whether or not its valid to be racist to serpentine. as a general rule im very much against demonizing an entire species/race/family as a result of "youre the children of [x] so you are born horrible and anybody who treats you poorly because of that is right" bc it reeks of racism and is incredibly supportive of unfounded prejudice and so on and so forth but like. ok if youre going to do that. the least you can do is STICK WITH IT!!!!!!! its literally like "ohhh the serpentine are evil" "ohhhhh condemning all the serpentine by virtue of their blood is actually kind of racist!" "ohhhhhh wu was so stupid for trusting that snake he shouldve been racist from the start" MAKE UP YOUR MIND. PLEASE. im not asking for much.

i also didnt like how they kind of tried to give zane's power to nya its like. ….. ok look i get it we've all watched atla if you can control water logically you should be able to control ice. HOWEVER. since you have decided that these are two separate elements you need to KEEP it that way because otherwise whats the point of having zane's power if nya is just going to take it. they didnt quite go that far but they were sort of angling for it and i dont like it. please give the women something of their own to do instead of just taking each other's (see: pixal becoming samurai x (actually unrelated but technically shouldnt it be ronin x given that nya/pixal dont serve a feudal master) instead of making up her own thing to do) or taking the men's (whatever the heck was going on this season with nya and ice). but whatever.

miscellaneous thoughts

akita is cool i support wolfgirls. i dont really have any deeper thoughts on her than this but i would like to see her again

didnt like how they brought back the giant hairy eyeball for a useless filler episode and had pixal beat it completely by herself, thereby cheapening the entirety of season 5 (or whatever season it was)

and. of course. this wouldnt be a proper season 11 review if i didnt talk about the literal most important part of the entire thing. that is right.

super saiyan jay.

so yeah. season couldve been better but honestly super saiyan jay makes up for everything wrong the ninjago writers have ever done

my apologies for the v e r y late reply this weekend was hw hell. but i did learn my favorite heartwrenching fact about neanderthals so :] small wins. absolutely THRILLED to see these in my inbox let's goooo

b-plots how i miss you... hate hate hate that the 11 minute episode is default now in animation, it works well for some shows (having watched all of SU through - yeah it works, but only really well for shows with very specific scopes, and ninjago is nothing BUT vastly outsizing its own scope)... having just finished rewatching s1 all in one sitting holy crap does the b-plot do so much heavy lifting for making the story actually work. s1 is. a mess. but it genuinely does so much better at foreshadowing than i expected and the ability to juggle multiple plot points in a single episode is SUCH a loss for the later seasons... the netflix season chopper curse my beloathed. nothing else to say there we both know we've experienced vld

yes!!! kudos to the team for fuckin it up even worse than archie sonic i love it to bits. we've got time loops we've got alternate realities we've got immortal(ish) old guys with fucky aging and a kid with even fuckier aging and retconned in hereditary superpowers. we've got every possible "what the fuck thats not how that works-" moment imaginable and it's stunning. everything about wu and garmadon's childhood (if you can call the implied thousands of years where they looked like kids/teenagers that) is fascinating to me and i am thrilled to find out how the spinjitzu brothers books fuck it up even more. the bad luck these guys gotta have for all their positive relationships dying out (humans :() and making all their enemies out of psuedo-immortal weirdos who can hold a hell of a grudge.

tangentially related yess obsessed with the FSM's pioneering fatherly shittiness. first dad worst dad. objectively better than if he was an actively good dad or was genuinely trying to harm his kids this is just what happens when god has zero positive role models. or role models at all. and deals with his complex feelings about his heritage with baby creation. idk the way they handle garmadon's morality is utterly deranged and i love to see them repeatedly shoot themselves in the foot trying to justify him being ~evil all along~ this honestly does more to explain why wu is. like that. than anything about garmadon adjfaksd. all this aside using this entire segment as my ref for my never-to-see-the-light-of-day spinjitzu bros fic thank you for having the wu and garmadon thoughts of all time <3

wu and zane.... i will never get over them. as previously mentioned i just finally finished rewatching s1 with Intent and ohhhh boy do i have infinite emotions over them and while 99% of it is extrapolation it is so incredibly sweet how much wu genuinely cared about zane and his lack of memory and how much he tries to comfort him. meanwhile all of that goes over zane's head bc he is. very bad at understanding his + others emotions at the time and most of the stuff wu is trying to help him with either hasn't registered or zane isnt even close to being able to put words to it much less internalize someone else's attempt to help. all this for wu to disappear on the brother acquisition mission for two weeks and come back to him being Completely Fine And Cool Cuz I'm A Robot Master :D. theres no way wu has any idea what a robot is in s1 and im living for it fuck the retcons. man's bewildered and his pseudo son (mark III) is Overcompensating.

my eternal inability to shut up about zane aside. all that to say wu's eagerness to make Terrible decisions in this part? stunning. the squandered potential of the ice emperor? i could complain about this for weeks. and have done so much to my discord friends chagrin. thank you for validating me AND reminding me to be infuriated. i will go read seven fics about it and have equally strong opinions about those (one day i will write the nature v nurture themed zane fic that lives in my brain and only contribute to this problem). uh. where was i going

LITERALLY YEAH?? ive never seen ANYONE bring up the complete nonsense of the staff and it's abilities WHY does it get magic cheatcodes to the ninjago multiverse. why did they not take the chance to make a joke about chima again. the world may never know

serpentine racism... once again the most common of kids media "everyone in this group is Evil bc we need punching bags" consequences and entirely unanswered. the early seasons imply the skulkins just integrated into everyday life and like half the snakes are just chilling... if you can accept the whole ass skeletons why are we still conflicted about pythor girlboss edition. tangentially: i am now obsessed w/ the idea of pixal stealing ronin's identity bc she was being pedantic about the definition of samurai. do it girl dude doesn't stand a chance.

THE ANIME EPISODE.... i have unwittingly entered the orbit of dragon ball fandom and i am SO excited to torture my brother who's a fan with this one it's such. it's so. it's beyond words. i've seen people hate on this and they are SO wrong this is exactly what ninjago has always been. utterly bonkers and doing whatever the hell they want.

#text✨ #liveninjablogging #ninjago #HELLO BELOVED MUTUAL TYSM FOR THIS. AGAIN. these remain the highlights of the entire fandom for me tysssssm #also extremely funny to me how much of our linguistic patterns are bleeding over onto each other through these. formatting aside #once again. the opinions of all time

[moodymillennialmom]

So I am late to the Stranger Things party but having just watched season 1 for a second time I think I have an unpopular opinion.......

Steve is not a jerk or bully or anything other than a typical teenager in season 1. The bad things he does are all reactionary and he does everything he can to make up for it after. Teenagers are not known for their forethought so a teenager getting mad or upset and doing something shitty and realizing later "oh shit I shouldn't have done that" is kinda how teenagers are.

* Breaking Jonathan's camera.

I actually have no issue with him doing this. It's 100% justified. Those pictures were creepy and gross and a crime. He not only took them he developed them at school where at least one other person saw them to even tell Steve about them. These could have easily been taken, copied and passed around. So taking them was bad, developing them worse, but doing at school was just awful and stupid. Even still Steve felt bad and bought him a new camera, which as I have no issue with breaking the camera is, well, whatever, it's nice but he didn't have to in my opinion.

Now these next two I'm not going to defend so much as understand a teenage mind set and point out his actions after.

They kinda go together. So spray painting the sign and the fight with Jonathan. He was wrong in both cases . Totally and completely wrong. He humiliated and slut shamed Nancy in a very public way and he said terrible things about Jonathan's mom and 'dead' brother and used a slur. This is however where I point out a teenage mindset. Steve thinks based on what he saw Nancy is cheating with Jonathan. Which would suck bad enough for anyone but given we were told earlier his mom can't trust his dad to not cheat it is probably an especially touchy spot for Steve. He's angry and hurting and he lashes out. He was wrong, there's no justification for that and I am not justifying just saying that teenagers act first and think later and a hurt teenager is especially irrational. I don't think either thing is indicative of his normal behavior.

Where I think we go back to Steve is a good guy is that he realizes that on his own. No one tells him he was wrong, if anything the people around him at that moment are encouraging this behavior. He then goes and cleans off the sign himself. The next thing he does is go to apologize to Jonathan, not Nancy but Jonathan. That is important because he's not doing it to try to save his relationship or whatever. He goes to Jonathan because he feels bad.

The other time he is kind of jerky is when Nancy tells him she went to the police about Barb. Again not his best moment his first reaction is scared to get in trouble. This again is pretty typical teenage behavior. He doesn't know Barb and is quite frankly more concerned about himself than her. He sucks but I want you to really think about how much thought you gave to the kids you went to highschool with who were not your friends and then get back to me on whether or not you would ask someone to at least not mention the underage drinking. The honest people are going to admit that Steve's request to not mention the beer to cops is probably something they would have asked as well.

All teenagers act impulsively. That's the whole reason most of these story lines happen is because the teenagers/kids do things without consulting adults. Steve is just the only one whose actions as a teenager keep getting brought up and used against him. I mean when was the last time anyone even brought up Jonathan's creepy photos?

Everyone keeps saying Steve has had so much character growth and I would agree but unlike everyone else who says he is becoming a better person I think he is just growing up. He is maturing. He's always been a decent person but he was an impulsive (probably lonely) teenager and now he is becoming an adult.

#steve harrington #stranger things #steve has always been a decent guy and he is just growing up and getting even better

[the-firebird69]

This is my mom. She's not the woman who was shot that was Becca trying to pretend that she was her and in a case of mistaken identity no and she was shot not by my mom or my dad with my ghwb who had my dad pulls as himself Lyman frank Baum and it says that he's lying and he's being frank about baum. Basically we're listening to the same code from this guy who can't remember anything easily and his uncle Vic and he's a strict disciplinarian and a mean dangerous person and very evil for an s. My husband said it quite clearly to him one day you do more work than we do we survive much easier and have lives that are much better you've wasted your time and he said I don't think so but you're right and he knew he was right I need new Mike did it make for under and he had already done him in because he knew about it that's why he did it cuz he thought he was a fool and he is. The shooting was justified she was sitting there messing with the two Non-Stop no George did it to indicate my dad there's some signs and you can figure it out he says but he's very dangerous and can become anybody almost and she watched out for him and saw him doing things and a lot of people don't and it was awful for her and she's witness

Right now their computers are monitoring what we're saying and engaging it and they're trying to figure out what to do but of course there's a fight between the families and George's fighting my husband's brother always. And we don't think they're going to succeed because of that and we're probably right but they have a plan and they're running it and the nephilim went up there and we're taking over and it's going to find out the ones here on Earth are taken over. Some people found a big computer up there on Titan and they couldn't stop the thing and had to destroy it it's kind of the same

Hera Zues

I want to explain something these two have been investigating a lot of stuff and find out what's going on and this makes a lot of sense and he had a trouble with George quite a bit of it and his brother was helping him and the Sun is about to leave on and I guess that's me because it's not Dave and it's not Levi which is ghwb. He's a mean cantankerous old man I found him the same things for just you looking at him and he was that way and her friend is that way that you don't know it he wants to know why you're looking at him and it's much deeper it's not because he's an ornery and evil and he says that I'm not right it's because he's powerful and now I'm starting to see something those two are fighting too. Over a lot of stuff and you people next door don't know anything you're so out of class to go around doing what he wants it's terrible horrible you have to stop bothering you I suppose George was bothering him and he's using you to cost a big problem I think George is a wimp because he's doing it and say was back the same with Mac. The only says it too it's kind of basic human nature it's causing the facts are actually the reaction and what he does is different and nobody recognizes it he's just trying to Ward you off so this day will go okay but nobody cares I care and we had a decent time of Chinese food there's nothing wrong with it and everybody says you're doing this and that and we went doing anything we didn't send much out at all and you guys are having the time anyways you're bunch of wackos trying to say at 12:00 noon will Lynch you I mean who the hell would I put something out there so he figured out what you're trying to do it looks over it says you're all fighting each other I don't even notice it. Soon back to what we're doing ignore them completely and I got to pissy finally we left I'll tell you what you people suck for this stupid actor doing we don't know who you're acting for we call it out so many times to shut you up and you won't it's got mad cuz constantly pushing it too and it's really stupid is there some dumb then yes how can he make it better so I don't know what's going on here exactly but most of you don't know what you're doing and George left and is entombed or dead and he's right a lot of stuff and a lot of stupid things and the computers have taken over whether you like it or not cuz they're still in tunes they don't have any savvy at all

Ken

[firstofmay23]

Day 2 part 1: Changi-Heathrow-Keflavík

Landed in Changi airport at midnight. I was worried that I might need to book an overnight room which might bankrupt me. But turned out everyone is just sleeping on seats and sofas so might as well do the same. And some of the table were equipped with power plug and since it was midnight finding a decent spot was very easy.

I also realized that in my flight I was the only one carrying mountain backpack in the plane, oops.

But of course, I wasn’t able to sleep properly so I decided to find something to eat

I also bought the fish skin chips to eat later on. Heaven.

And that is only hour 4 of my 12 hours layover. Luckily Changi was pretty convenient so I managed to sneak some more rest, do some work, and get myself coffee. Took a while to board the next plane but I finally did

The flight from Singapore to London was done what…interesting. I sat next to these lovely old Australian couples, didn’t catch their name but I’m pretty sure the wife is called Edna. And in front of me there is this Singaporean family with a very loud kids, and this is where the drama started.

I couldn’t tell you the details because I was half asleep during the whole thing. So the kids in front of my seat was shouting and yelling and to be honest it was pretty annoying but I had zero energy to deal with it and decided to put on my earbuds and get some rest. She was also pushed her seat a little too way back, so when I got my food I was unable to pull out the tray. The wife and husband probably had enough of it and told off the parents that their kid was misbehaving. The flight attendant was there of course, because he was giving out lunch on our row. He tried to talk to the couple and ask about what was happening and managed to calm them down. Very good for him, I would never had the patience to be honest. But after that things got more relaxed, except the occasional crying baby on the front. But then again, earbuds and Rammstein did their thing. As well as my second glass of wine

The rest of the flight was just me eating, drinking wine, watching sandman, wondering when we will land, and an occasional check outside the window to see where in the world am I (literally)

Somewhere in Middle East

Finally it was a couple hours before landing. I’ve been wanting to go to the loo but I don’t feel like moving across two people so usually on a short flight I just wait until we land. But this is a 13 hours flight and I just have to. So when I told the couple that I need to go, their reaction was “so finally you’re going to the loo! We thought you’d never go!” Which was funny to me because they’re probably looking at the amount of drinks I had and was wondering if I was ever going to go. Curious to know what the convo was like.

So finally landed in Heathrow, and sparing no time to rest I went as fast as I could (which was not fast at all) because it’s almost boarding time to Reykjavik, while taking a few pics of the airport for my ‘mom I made it back to London’ moment. And me being me, of course I took a wrong turn and had to walk all the way to the OTHER end of the terminal because I misread the sign. When I finally got to my gate, it’s boarding time already

I don’t know if because it’s my first time flying with it or because it’s a night flight, but Icelandair is a very cute airline. Like small but elegant in a non flashy way. I can’t think of a better way to explain it. I think it’s partly because how the cabin was lit, it was this nice white light with slightly bluish tinge to it. I wish I took some pictures of the interior.

The turbulence was worse than the previous flight. Maybe because we’re going up north, or because the plane was smaller. But when we were about to land, my God it was beautiful. It was dark on one side and sun was setting on the other. But when we finally landed, it was midnight and dark.

#singapore #london #iceland #travel

[squirrel-the-adhd-mom]

Chapter Ten- Wtf?

10/05/2022

I didn’t sleep great. Decent but not great. My body is worn out. Last night I was doing this screwed up type of sleeping that I call “sleep thinking.” Basically my body is sleeping my eyes are closed but my brain says fuck you, Mikayla, you have to much to think about. Then, Logan’s alarm goes off. Of course he doesn’t hear it right away and snoozes it a few minutes after it starts. Poor guy has the man flu. Sorry guys but men are pansies. They get a head cold or a stuffy nose and the world starts ending. Buddy not to be an ass hole which I think we’ve all declared I am, but go ahead and push a baby out or have your body sliced half way open while your awake might I add to bring a baby into the world. Then be expected to get up and do all your normal duties as if a stork just dropped the little crotch goblin off in a sheet on your front porch. Men seriously have zero idea what women put them selves through. Sorry not sorry. Anyways then, CJ (Clayleigh James) wakes up. Eh it must’ve been about 3am. Just for the record she normally doesn’t but sleep regression around the age of one is a real and incredibly frustrating thing. So I wake up make her bottle and get her back to sleep. Lay down and I’m thinking to myself “just go to sleep, count the sheep.” Damn it, brain interferes, “haha nice try, Mikayla, I’ve got things for you to consider.” Stupid things like: what chore am I going to accomplish in the morning? Do I shampoo and conditioner my hair in the shower? Don’t forget to put a load in the washer! Oh if you remember maybe unload the dishwasher. Shit, don’t forget to palate Cruë. Oh and ask Brandi to give Ryann a bath because your a shit for brains mom and forgot. Yeah, yeah, fuck you too ADHD brain. Next time just let me sleep. I function better when I SLEEP!

You know. Well you probably don’t but maybe you do. That people with ADHD more times than not actually have incredibly high IQs. Theo is incredibly intelligent. He catches on to things quickly. Included but not limited to getting out of things he doesn’t want to do. For example: writing. It something he struggles with which is also very common with kids with ADHD. So instead of trying to just misbehaves so he gets sent out of the classroom to go see his behavioral teacher. Face palm. I am so incredibly blessed with a strong willed, intelligent human. Accept I wish he would save all these great qualities for when he moves out of my house.

Discouragement. To some this means something brings you down for a little bit but you get up and try again. For me this means if something isn’t going as well as I thought it might I want to shut down the idea all together because I feel like a failure. This blog for example I thought I’d get more feed back on. My instant reaction and impulsive mind says to forget it no body cares and I should just shut up no body wants to listen to my sob story. My realistic brain says don’t give up. So I am trying really hard not to. Discouragement makes me my own worse enemy. Which leads me to instant gratification.

Instant gratification. When something happens and immediately makes you feel good inside. Which makes the impulsive instinct VERY easy to jump on. Impulsive behavior is not only an ADHD trait but a lot of people struggle with it. Trust me when I say just because your impulsive doesn’t mean you have ADHD, and just because you have ADHD doesn’t mean you are impulsive, but if you have ADHD there is a good chance you are impulsive. I am ADHD with the impulsive trait and the easily discouraged trait along with a lot of the other fantastic traits that come with ADHD. Congratulations, Mikayla, you might as well send yourself to the nut house.

Theo put him self tonight. Didn’t even fight going to his room. It doesn’t happen often but when it does it’s safe to say that he is tired and his brain gave him a run for his money. These moments all though few and far between I like to refer to as the ADHD crash. It’s when your brain just goes, goes, goes until it just can’t anymore. It’s the ultimate exhaustion. Similar to an adrenaline rush come down but possibly worse. Every being of your body just quits. I got home early but I didn’t get shit done for the same reason. The difference is I can’t just go put myself to bed because, well I’m “mom.”

#adhd brain #adult adhd #living with adhd #wyoming #momlife

[doodlboy]

Woo! I'm tired!

#i fuckin... told dad that I picked a name our for myself today #i think it was a decent reaction- probably better than what mom's is going to be #he talked abt some trans ppl who work at meijer w/ him and he was pretty cool abt it #i dunno he was more receptive to it than i expected #anyway #gnight folks #ily #stay rad #get good sleeps #*mwah* #✌💜🌙 #pedigree rambles

[alovesongshewrote]

Tongues | The Four Lords HCs

based on this request from ao3:  I think a headcanon about like what if the reader secretly learned the native language of their lovers? Like Italian for Donna, French for Moreau, German for Heisenberg, and i actually don't know what Alcina would be cause her name is either Italian or French or she's Romanian i dunno. It would be cute to read the reactions of the four lords hearing the tongue of their people. :)

YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY CORRECT, THIS IS A REALLY CUTE REQUEST

Taglist: @prismarts @blixeon @mxcheese @valentimmy @chrysanthykios

Headcanons

Lady Dimitrescu

Ok, i think lady D is Romanian, and also, Romania is a pretty cool country so we’re gonna roll with that

So

You learn Romanian

Personally, i think the girls would teach it to you

Like

You wandered over like

“Hey, I wanna impress your mom by learning Romanian”

And they were down

So, they teach you Romanian

Shenanigans ensue

They probably start by teaching you the swears and then they move on to other stuff

But eventually, you can speak decent Romanian

And uh

You decide to use it

One night you and Alcina are just cuddling

Hangin out, as you do

And you look up at her

And you call her your darling

Draga mea, if you were wondering

And s h e

She needs a second

BUT ONLY A SECOND

She springs back a minute later, and says something very complicated and very sweet in Romanian

You

Understand all of the words she says

Separately

So now you need a minute

And during that minute you’re just

Staring at her in awe

Your face is warm

You’re having a hard time breathing

And she just kinda

Giggles at you

After that, Alcina takes over your Romanian lessons

You have to admit

Her methods work better

Donna Beneviento

Right, so

With donna

If you tried to get someone to teach you Italian

It would be angie

And angie

Would only teach you the swears

So, you know how to swear in Italian now

But that’s it

So i guess you get duolingo up in the village

And i gotta say

That little green owl is scarier than anything the village has to offer

Like

After you start using duo, it’s like

Dolls? No problem

Basement fetus? Pssh

The scariest thing is that fucking bird

But anyway, eventually, after a bit of a streak

You learn Italian

You’re still best at swearing, but

You do know the rest

Including how to flirt

Because duolingo has classes on that

And so

One day

Donna’s just

Doing her thing

Sewing away

And you slink in

Wrap your arms around her shoulders

And u whisper somethin

A little dirty

In Italian

Andddd

Donna.exe has stopped working

And she needs

Like

A whole ass hour to calm down

Thank fuck for the veil, because otherwise, you would’ve seen her turn into a tomato

And if she’s comfortable enough to go without the veil around you, well

You get tomato donna

But yeah, anyway

When she’s recovered

She just

Hugs you

She really appreciates that you learned Italian for her

Salvatore Moreau

Ok, to be honest

I don’t think he’d notice

at least right away

Like

Maybe you’d learn french from some of his notebooks

And the evil green owl

And so you’re ready to surprise him

You hear him speaking french to himself while he’s tending to the reservoir

And he like

Asks himself a question

And you answer it

And he’s just like

“Oui, merci, merci.”

And then he keeps on going

And you’re standing there like

“Moreau? Babe? Je parle français?”

“Oui, oui, c’est du bon français.”

“Babe???”

“OH! TU PARLES FRANÇAIS!!”

So

He just has a whole

Freak out over it

But it’s ok, you’re also freaking out

You both start, just

Enthusiastically yelling in french

It’s a very exciting time

Karl Heisenberg

Ok, once again, gonna be honest

He taught you all the swears

It wasn’t even on purpose, you just heard him swearing in German and you were like

“Ok, time to google what the fuck he���s saying”

And thennn you kinda

Fell down a rabbit hole and learned German that way

Thanks internet

Anyway

Heisenberg doesn’t actually notice that you’ve learned German until he like

Does something kinda stupid that pisses you off

At which point you jump into an hour long lecture

All in German

He is

Taken aback

He is

Not focusing on what you’re saying

He is focusing on the fact that he can understand what you’re saying and you aren’t speaking english

So, finally you finish yelling

And he’s like

“So, you learned German, huh?”

So now you’re blushing

And you’re like

“Maybe”

“Maybe?”

“... a little bit.”

“A little bit?”

“... a lot bit.”

He laughs at you, but it’s like

Affectionate

No one has ever cared about him that much before

And he appreciates that you do

So yeah, he’s gonna laugh and mess up your hair as you leave the room

But please know that he’ll be up all night thinking

“They learned German… for me <3”

#re8 x reader #resident evil 8 x reader #lady dimitrescu x reader #karl heisenberg x reader #salvatore moreau x reader #donna beneviento x reader

[silverrstarrr]

Headcanons of Eren with a Black s/o!🍡

(Happy black history month babes! Remember blm isn't just in this month but all year long :p)

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• You guys most likely met in your high school years.

• I feel as if Eren would stare a lot at you during freshman year. Not in a bad way but in a Curious/adoring way. I mean all his friends are white lmao💀

• He probably approached you during a class period you guys have together.

• I don't think he would be ignorant? But he'll most likely ask to touch your hair.

• Maybe you have braids, locs, or passion twist or your natural curls out/4c Afro—doesn't matter, he'll ask to touch your hair.

• Of course you can decline and tell him no, he won't really fuss over it. He'll even apologize.

• But trust me, he's going to keep staring 😭 he thinks you're really pretty, don't worry ;)

• He won't care about your Skintone/shade, lightskin, brownskin, dark-skinned. He likes them all, I don't see Eren ever have a preference in girls in general.

• Whoever he likes, he likes.

• You guys hit it off in your freshman year.

• He'll ask a lot of questions about you and your culture and your hair

"Hey, why do you wear braids??"

"Is your hair really this long? Wow 😁"

• PLEASE LMAO, I TAKE THESE AS AN INSULT BUT I KNOW HE'S JUST HE CURIOUS 😭

• You'll have to explain to him about your hair.

• You guys most likely snapped and he sent a streak of him getting out the shower and his hair is wet.

• You'll go on about how you can't wash your hair everyday, that you have a certain wash day and his reaction is like "😲"

• Poor baby is like "woooow" and ever since then, he's been hook up to learn about your lifestyle, your family, cookouts, etc. He just wants to know you.

• He calls you pretty a lot.

• Not in a flirtatious way just because he thinks YOURE really pretttyyyy. He's just stating the obvious queen���❗

• He offered to go to the Beauty supply store once or twice to buy your weave/pick out the next color. Or he'll just accompany you.

• Also would pick out your next nail color, maybe hairstyle.

• He doesn't care if you wear lakefront, wigs, braids, or natural. He believes they're all beautiful. Plus he understands that our hair need protective hairstyles and can't really, yjehehejehwhww iykyk.

• During BHM, he would do the mossstt.😭

• He'll buy you food and buy you hairproducts.

• He'll constantly post about African American stories on his social media.

• Talked Armin into making a poem about discrimination and racism then made him read out loud to you in the hallway😭

• Would buy a BLM shirts for him Mikasa and Armin.

"Look y/n! We're supporting your people. Remember we're on your side. BLM!!"

• IM CRACKLING TOO MUCH LMAOOOO.

• Don't worry, he's has the right attitude but mann💀

• Depends on the type of person you are: you probably confronted them and told them to relax. Or, you dealt with it and the embarrassment 😭

• You most likely ask him for Reparations 🙄❗🤞

• He deadass would give you them.

• He'll be confused at first and probably wouldn't  even understand the word 💀

• But he'll give you money though LMAO.

This was 15 year old Eren, moving on to when he's older.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• You guys are older. You've been introduced to the rest of his friend squad. Jean, Connie, Marco, sasha etc.

• Jean most definitely thinks you're pretty and fell for you at first sight. Eren didn't like this at all.

• Eren never really understood why he didn't like it when Jean played in your braids. Eren then started to purposely make you lay between his legs so he play with your braids before Jean could.

• They probably reacted the same as Eren about regarding your hair.

• Eren would take it upon himself to explain and even tell them about Lace fronts, sew ins, braids, etc

• He'll probably show off about  how much he knows about your hair.

• Eren would ask to help you with your hair.

• He most likely looked up YouTube videos about how to plate hair or how to deal with your hair type in general.

• You could probably teach him. He wouldn't understand the first time but with practice, he's pretty good. Not better than you though 🙄🤞❗

• Carries Hair ties, brushes and combs on him just for you.

• You also carry hair ties for him because of his long hair.

• You're the person who even puts his hair into that sexy ahh man bun🤨❗

• Most likely help you on wash day. Massages oil into your scalp.

• Supplies you with hairproducts.

• Likes it when you play in his hair. During PE, you guys would sit on the bench. Him between your thighs relaxing as you caress his hair.

• You guys look so cute and perfect while doing this. Connie and Sasha would always tease you about being Eren's gf.

• Loves your food! Like literally, he's in love with it.

• During the summertime, you invited him to a cookout. A lot of your family members stared at him but you know, they're accepting and gave him some food, chatted him with etc.

• Ever since then, he would always ask your mom to come over for dinner or save him a Plate lmao😭

• Sometimes if you were to cook, he'll be in the kitchen watching you

"Why are you watching me?"

"I wanna watch you so I can learn to cook your food and surprise you one day with it."

"Suurree but you can't out-cook me."

• He'll then smirk and accept that challenge.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

Sorry I just realized I've only been talking about yall friendly part, lemme get into more intimacy 🥲

• He always have his hands on your hips, waist or ass.

• Maybe you're cuddling in the library or something, his hands are on your ass.

• Black women naturally have curvy bodies In my opinion. And curvy can mean thick, skinny or in the middle. They're still curves.

• He loves kissing your lips. Either that or your neck.

• When you're walking together he always have his hand around your waist.

• Eren seems like the type to hug you from behind and kiss the top of your head.

• I dont think he's big on PDA but that doesn't mean he won't do it.

• You're talking to Jean? Wraps his arms around your waist from behind and places his head on your shoulder- kissing your neck.

• If you so happen to have thay dump trunk in the back, he'll always caress it, give it a pat or smack it. But in the most sly way ever.

You're in the hallway, chatting up with Jean. You guys are discussing the topics of what was recently covered in class. Jean cracks a joke about how the teacher was talking and their looks. You laugh at the small insults he was throwing at your professor. Eren recently just left his class a few doors down from where you and Jean was. He notices your long box braids from down the hall and sees a tall male walking alongside with you. Eren quickly caught up with you guys. As he walked passed you, his hands slides over and grabs a good squeeze from your ass. Naturally you wouldn't mind but for some reason you got embarrassed and flustered. Most likely it was because Jean was there. Before you could respond  and complain to him, he leans over and places his lips against yours. Obviously, you kiss him back as his free hand grabs your chin, deepening the kiss. It was passionate. The kiss was probably to make up for his sudden actions but it was also because he missed your presence and touch. The way your lips felt against his own, his hands grasping and holding your hips rolled, everything. Jean rolled his eyes,

"Okay lovebirds, I get it." You break away from Eren with a small smile. You turn towards  Jean with an apologetic look, since he did just kiss you in the middle of a conversation.

Jean nodded and said his goodbyes, he'll catch up with you another. Watching as his figured faded within the crowd, you turn towards Eren and smack his arm. He let out an "ow" in response.

"Eren, what was that for? I usually don't mind it but we were chatting."

He lets out a soft groan and buries his head into your neck. He released the grip on your rear and just lays it there as his other hand slips down and does the same. You tap his back and he raises his head from it's previous position. You give him a few quick pecks, wrapping your arms around his neck, he quickly to returns the small kissed back. You both smile at one another, letting out a small giggle.

"Its okay baby, I miss you too." You peck his cheek for the last time.

"We can walk home together after school, meet me at my last period class." 

Eren face brightens up when you say those words. Mann, this boy was in love. The bell rang and you notice all the kids scrambling to get to class. He releases his arms from you and grabs your hand as you both scurry along to your next period class.

He drops you off and waves at Armin and Marco that happens to be in your last period.

"Remember your promise y/n!!" He said as he walked off to the direction of his class.

You rolled your eyes jokingly and settled in to class.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

Okay bonus:

I feel as if Eren would talk you into making those tik toks that beautiful darkskin/brownskin woman do with makeup and their cute ass hair. Of course you'll end up doing it because he kept hyping yo ass up and wouldn't let it down.

The video actually goes viral and gets a decent 345k likes with 1.1m views. Some of the kids in school  came across the video and started chatting up with you. Even some guys you never knew before started to hit you up but Eren gets so Jealous and has you hold his hands always in the halls 😭

Okay thank you loves! Please request/suggest things for him. I don't mind doing one of these for Jean, Connie, etc. Next up are my jjk men 🤨❗

#eren headcanons #eren x reader #eren yeager #eren jeager #eren yeager x reader #eren yeager x you #x reader #attack on titan #aot x black reader #eren x black reader #levi ackerman #eren smut #eren fluff

[writingthingsisdifficult]

Good intentions

Bucky Barnes x reader

Had to divide the story into four parts, and I’m working as fast as I can to finish the rest.

Please don’t hesitate to tell me what you think :) Especially if you like it.

Everybody's alive.

When Natasha catches your reaction to seeing a soaking wet Bucky coming in from the rain, your life becomes unbearable. Nat considers herself a decent matchmaker, but what happens when both her subjects are resisting her attempts?

***

Part 1: Matchmaker

Word count: 4412

It had been raining for weeks. Racing streaks down the glass. Soft drumming against the umbrella. Big, fat drops of water splashing against the pavement, sending shivers through my body whenever they hit my skin. Two in rapid succession on my neck – don't know how, though, my coat collar was pulled up as high as it could go, and my umbrella was larger than average. Then one straight into my ear, which made me squeak in disgust. This had to be an omen.

I shook my umbrella before stepping through the door. No need to be a savage, though from the look of it, I was the only one who cared. A quick nod good morning to Nesta in the reception while making a mental note to call down the cleaning crew. The state of the floor was appalling. Mud and dirt and water – apparently not everyone remembered to wipe their feet before entering the building. And umbrellas all along the wall, dripping on the tiles, creating puddles so large a toddler would happily jump in them.

A long sigh escaped. Time for a stern talk with Nesta again. This was supposed to be a good first impression, not an impression of someone's mudroom. My stomach twisted, this was just the latest in a long string of minor complaints. If she didn't improve soon, I would have to make a note in her file and I hated being strict. Still, it was a part of my job, just like running errands before eight in the morning and longing for the coffee I left in my office. I didn't have to like it.

The elevator pinged. “Hey, Y/N.” Natasha walked out with a smile on her face. Her hair was red again, like flames cascading over her shoulders. Damn, that woman really could carry any hair colour. I nodded and smiled back. “Good morning, Agent Romanov. You're in early. What can I do for you? Love your hair, by the way."

"Thanks. I was wondering if you could help me with something."

I shook off my coat and adjusted the bag on my shoulder. "Of course. What do you need? Let me just –""

The door blew open, banging into the doorstopper before closing behind a sopping wet figure and an umbrella that definitely had seen better days. "Good morning, Y/N. Hey, Nat. Have you seen Clint?" Bucky shook himself, sending a glittering spray of water everywhere.

"No, but check the roof."

The air was knocked straight out of me. I couldn't stop the tiny squeak that tumbled over my lips.  The way his hair stuck to his face did things to me, not to mention how the water glistened on his metal arm. I hadn't felt heat on my face like that since I was seventeen and spilled juice all over my shirt in front of my neighbour Todd.

Swallowing the rest of the rude noises hovering in my throat, I forced a smile and nodded to the elevator. "Saw him by the coffee machine on the third floor earlier, Sargent Barnes." My voice was breathier that usual, and I cursed the weather for calling me out like that, while simultaneously praying to any deities listening that nobody noticed.

"Thanks." He marched to the elevator with a pace that would divide a crowd of people without a word.

Natasha looked between Bucky and me, a devilish smile spreading on her face. Once he was out of earshot, she bumped me with her elbow. “So, Bucky, huh?”

The heat crept up my ears and settled in my temples. Surely I was no more than two seconds from combusting? “What? I don’t… no, I mean –" I drew a big breath and steeled my face. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Now, what was it you needed my help with?”

Her eyes locked on mine. "Never mind that… You're a terrible liar."

A good point. I let out a small wheeze and scrunched my eyes shut. "Fine! Yes, Sargent Barnes is a tall drink of water. Is that what you want me to say? Well, yeah, okay. Maybe I do have a thing for him." The defeat was inevitable. Already my intestines were squirming. Nothing good could come from this.

Natasha looked like it was Christmas and her birthday all at once. "I knew it!"

I shrugged, ignoring the rising chill in my chest. How to best deescalate this before it got out of hand? "Well, you are a superspy after all. But please, PLEASE, don't say anything to him. I like my job. Besides, he's a fucking superhero. I'm just… me."

"Just you?" She shook her head lightly and rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, I mean, come on! Look at me!" Holding my arms out, I swayed from side to side. I never liked to draw attention to my body, but apparently she needed the extra visual.

Natasha arched her eyebrow. "I am looking."

She was good, but I couldn't to give up that easily. "Yes, and then you clearly see that I'm ordinary. People like him don't fall for people like me. He's too perfect for that."

"Perf… perfect?" She snorted. "Y/N, Bucky's a mess. He's basically a cucumber with anxiety. Damn, you really have it bad if –"

"I know he has issues. You all do. I'm the one booking everybody's therapy sessions, remember? I'm not talking about his trauma. I'm talking about the fact that he's sweet as a marshmallow and his smile could power a small European country if Stark only found a way to harness its brilliance –"

"And the fact that he's got those broad shoulders and could probably lift and throw a bus if he wanted…"

"And that," I nodded, rubbing the back of my neck to stop that annoying heat from spreading even more. That was a delicious picture, alright. "But I'm nothing special."

"Y/N, sweetie, what are you talking about? You know everything, who's supposed to be where, what we're doing, when we come and go – that's practically a superpower right there. Don't downplay yourself."

The laughter came out dry and humourless. She had to be kidding. Being organised and good at puzzles wasn't exactly rocket science. And besides, I didn't even have a good memory. Without my trusty calendar and phone I'd be running around like Hei-Hei.

"Appreciate your confidence in me, but I don't think so, Nat," I countered and repeated: "Please don't tell him."

She sighed. "I won't."

I tilted my head and put on my best mom-voice. "Promise me."

Her shoulders slumped forward, and she lifted her hand in the air. "I promise I will never tell James Buchanan Barnes about your crush." There was a small pause. "Partypooper!"

"Who's a partypooper?"

I yelped and spun around, looking into Tony's smiling face. "Oh my god, Tony, I mean, Mr Stark." Why did he have to be so stealthy? A big, flashy guy like him ought to be required to announce his arrival with trumpets and drums. Through my galloping heartbeats I noted the glasses were new though, and wondered what kind of new tech they really were. They suited him.

He smirked. “Not the first time a lady has said that to me. But you didn’t answer my question.”

Exhaling, I closed my eyes, just barely resisting the urge to pinch my nose – or maybe kick him in the shin as a diversion. This was going to hell with the express train. “No one. No one's a partypooper.”

“Really?” He turned to Natasha. “Nat?”

I shook my head vigorously, bringing forth all malice I had to my eyes, which I have been told is substantial.

"Y/N has a crush and –"

"Ooh, is it me?" He winked and wiggled his eyebrows.

That made me laugh. "What? Oh, god no." Then I immediately felt bad for my reaction.

"Okay, a little bit insulted, but whatever…"

"She won't let me tell Bucky that she's in love with him," Natasha continued as if she had never been interrupted.

Tony gasped, a look of absolute delight in his eyes.

It was as if the ground disappeared beneath me. A rush of adrenaline almost knocked me off my feet. "Natasha! You promised."

She shrugged and pointed at Tony. "I promised not to tell Bucky. Last I checked, that is not him."

This time I did pinch the bridge of my nose and exhaled deeply, then groaned silently. “Nat!” Even I could hear the desperation in my voice. “Sargent Barnes is a friend. Well, uh, a colleague. Of sorts. I do not -“

“So you didn’t just squeak and burst into flames when he came through that door, huh?” She pointed to the glass door with a grin on her face.

Yeah, this was definitely a torture-the-handler day. Though Natasha was right about my crush, of course, and I wasn't even sure it was just a crush anymore; it had lasted for far too long to be called a crush, I had to keep a professional relationship with all of them.

Truth be told I had had a crush on Bucky since the day we were introduced, but I remembered the exact moment I had fallen in love: it was a chilly spring evening about a year ago. The team had decided to go out to eat, Wanda had discovered a new restaurant downtown, and the food supposedly was to die for. I couldn’t remember what I ate, or if I even liked it, but I remembered the knitted cardigan Bucky wore, the one with the colourful pattern on it. It looked really soft, and I found myself longing to touch it. That wasn’t the moment, though. The exact moment that made me go “Oh shit!” was when I cracked some stupid dad joke, and Bucky unleashed his full laughter on me. Who knew that "Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it's a soap opera," would be my doom? But the sound had stunned me, made me lose my voice for several minutes. If someone had opened my skull at that moment, the only thing they would have found was an empty space and a dial tone - my brain frantically trying to reconnect with my body. If I concentrated I could still hear the ringing in my ears.

I avoided him for a week afterwards - well, tried and failed; my work meant contact with the entire Avengers team at all times - but the mental distance hurt too much to keep up with it. Since then, I allowed the realisation to wash over me, causing me both joy and suffering. And I thought I hid it well. Not well enough, apparently, since Natasha sniffed it out. I resisted the urge to close my eyes and sigh again. However, I couldn’t stop my intestines from curling into a tight ball. She had brought Tony into this after all.

Tony’s eyes shone. It had been a long time since any drama unfurled in the compound. He was practically starved, and this… This was delicious.

Looking between them, I knew this wouldn't end well. "You know what? I'm gonna go set up the briefing. Room 705. Thirty minutes. Don't be late." Fishing the phone out of my pocket, I sent a group text to everyone with time and location. In afterthought the wording in the text might have been a tad too harsh, threatening bodily harm if they were late, but the start of the day warranted some sort of reaction leaking from my brain. I locked eyes with Natasha. "Not. A. Word!"

She nodded, but the grin never left her face.

Tony watched me frantically push the elevator button, and I caught him whispering, not knowing I could still hear him. Or maybe he didn't care. "So what's your plan?"

"What do you mean?"

"Don't you have a plan? You're the resident match-maker here, aren't you?"

Nastasha let out a small laugh. "Do you know why she refuses to do anything about it?"

Tony nodded. “Because she’s professional and a bit afraid for what the people at the top are going to say?”

“No. Well, probably that too, but she thinks Bucky is way out of her league. Something about him being a superhero.” She snorted.

“What?” Tony let out a barking laugh. “Why? Bucky’s like the most timid ex-assassin you can find. I mean, he’s basically a cup of soft serve covered in salt and liquorice."

“I know. We gotta get them together. So, uh, are you in?”

“Uh, yeah! What’s your plan?”

The room finally sealed itself around me and I heard nothing else than the back of my head banging against the mirror wall and F.R.I.D.A.Y. cheerfully announcing what floor I was going to.

Half an hour later I had to step out for a bit to fetch a new cable to the projector, and when I got back, almost everyone were seated. My chest hollowed when I spotted Tony and Natasha sitting together, looking very conspiring indeed.

The urge to either run from the room or break them up rose in my throat, but instead I pulled up a chair next to Sam and focused on my breathing. He was one of the most calming people on the team, and I shamelessly used him as a shield.

Other than the small scare in the beginning, the morning briefing went without hitch. Agent Hill presented the upcoming missions, and I marked my calendar accordingly. Apparently SHIELD had detected a new terrorist group forming in northern Europe, and needed eyes.

Natasha was a given, she could go undetected for longer periods of time, and could take care of herself if necessary. Of course, Clint would come with her. They were an amazing team together, and he would probably go anyway, even if he was assigned to another task. It was better just to let him.

Steve and Sam would step in if it came to that, but would have to keep under the radar until they were needed. Bucky would travel to Europe with the others, but I knew he would set off alone the minute they touched ground in Stockholm. He worked best alone, or so he claimed, and anyway it would be an advantage to spread out. Still, I made a note on my pad to make sure he had everything he needed, and then some. Who knew where his road might lead him.

Bruce and Tony would work together to develop a better algorithm for the surveillance. So far, the terrorist group had evaded SHIELD's best efforts to pin them down. I was actually surprised to learn they didn't even know their name, which made me suspect something big was coming.

The rest of the team was assigned to other, smaller missions, scattered across the States. That way they could easily be reassigned if the situation escalated in Europe.

During the meeting, I kept an extra eye on Natasha and Tony. They sat next to each other, and though I thought I saw them passing notes a couple of times, I didn't want to bring any attention to it. The rest of the group looked oblivious. A sigh of relief escaped me, and Natasha looked up. She nodded imperceptibly towards Bucky, who sat with a bored look on his face and a discarded towel by his feet.

I narrowed my eyes and shook my head, trying my best to stop my ears from buzzing. Suddenly aware of every molecule in the air and trying desperately to ignore the intense weight, I focused all my attention back on Agent Hill’s presentation. Still, Bucky’s presence lingered in the back of my head, and together with the imminent threat from Natasha and Tony, I felt like I was sitting on explosives.

When Maria finally closed her laptop and turned to Director Fury, everybody got up, chatting as if the meeting had been a regular parent-teacher meeting and not a brief on a possible terrorist organisation on the rise.

“Can you believe that people will do things like this?” an agent asked as we all filed out of the room.

“Well, faith is a strong persuader,” I replied with a shrug. “Some are willing to go far for what they believe in.”

“Yeah, but they’re wrong,” the agent continued.

“They’d probably say the same about us,” Sam said, and I nodded.

“There are always two sides to the coin. If not more.”

“But -“

“And then it’s up to us to figure out what to do. We have to look at the big picture. Not everyone is capable of that.” Sam tilted his head with a look of disappointment in his eyes.

The agent huffed and hurried off with a look on his face that either said that he was constipated, or that being schooled by a member of the Avengers was too much for a Wednesday morning.

“Not sure he saw the big picture, Sam.” I shook my head and smiled.

“Don’t think he could. Better hope he doesn’t get promoted soon.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that. He’ll be on desk duty for years still. And I guess you have a little desk duty yourself right now?”

“Well, actually… I was hoping you could do me a favour.”

Uh-oh. That sounded ominous. “Of course. What can I do, what do you need?” My voice rose to mimic the retail job I had before I got lucky enough to join SHIELD's training and ultimately land my dream job.

Sam grimaced. "I gotta go to Louisiana. Just a short trip, couple of days maybe."

"Shit, don't think Director Fury would be too happy about that right now, not to mention the rest of upstairs. You're supposed to be on silent duty until you leave for Sweden."

"Yeah, I know that, it's just… Cass and AJ has been asking me to come visit. And Sarah's getting sick of their nagging. Also, I sorta promised on the phone yesterday. Didn't know there would be a world crisis today."

Smiling softly, I hid the urge to smack my face into the wall. This was going to take a lot of explaining and string-pulling. He was supposed to go no-contact for the duration of the mission, but I hated disappointing the boys. And Sarah was a good woman. She didn't deserve being let down, even though it technically wasn't Sam's fault this time.

"Sam, you're such a softie," I said after some consideration. "Go. I'll figure something out. Just be back before the weekend, okay? And –"

"Yeah yeah, and I'll come in at once if the situation escalates before we're scheduled to head out."

I gave him a crooked smile to disguise the trouble he had just handed me. "Sure. But I was gonna say bring back some of that pecan pie. I've been dreaming about that since last summer."

Sam let out a loud laugh and kissed the top of my head, melting my nervous soul to a gooey puddle. "You're the best. Thanks."

"Fly safe."

"I always do."

"Really now?"

"Oh so that's how it is, huh?"

"That's how it is. Say 'hi' to Sarah for me."

With a short wave, he took off down the corridor, leaving me quietly screaming and already doing the mental gymnastics to find a solution.

***

Departure time was in two days. Everyone was on edge, trying their best to prepare for any eventualities, both inconceivable and expected. After a short meeting with the departure crew to share the last pieces of intel, I felt empty and tired. Missions always affected me more than they should. These people were my friends; if anything were to happen to them, my world would collapse.

Apparently I wasn't the only one feeling a bit drained. No one was in a hurry to leave, and the conversation was hushed and weary.

"You know what we need?" Tony said loudly, slicing through the silence and winking to Natasha. He thought I wouldn't notice, but I did, and the suspicion grew in my chest. What now?

"Pizza!" they said in unison. "We should gather everyone, before we all go."

Tony nudged my arm. "My treat. What do you say?"

Narrowing my eyes, I tilted my head. "…sure."

"Oh, don't be like that. We all need good pizza. Especially today, what with all this rain. Hey, F.R.I.D.A.Y., you know that pizza bakery up the street, the one with the chicken one. Order pizza for everyone. Remember the one with pear, brie, and white sauce. Have it delivered to the lounge."

That did it for me. If he ordered my favourite, I'd be damn sure to eat my part. "When?"

"Uh…" He looked at his watch. "Noon. I'll send out a ping. Don't worry about it."

"Thanks. I do have a ton of things to do to make sure you guys don't die on this trip." I tried to keep it light, but now that the thought had settled in my mind, I had to fight off the tears. It was a miracle I managed to keep the tremble from my voice.

An hour later I tripped over the doorstep to the lounge, surprised to see it was empty except for Tony and Natasha and a huge stack of pizzas. "Where is everybody?" The door clicked behind me, sealing the silence in.

Natasha shrugged. "Late?"

At that moment the door opened again and Bucky sauntered in with a mischievous smile on his face. "Gimme the pizza and nobody gets hurt."

"Jeez, Buck. Remember your manners. There are ladies present." Tony grinned, but opened the top box and helped himself to a slice.

Bucky snickered and rolled his eyes. "Sorry, Y/N," he said with an over-the-top flourish. "I hope you can forgive my insolence." He gestured towards the pizzas. "Ladies first."

My heart did a somersault, but I managed to keep it cool on the outside. "Insolence forgiven," I replied, swallowing a hiccough that lodged itself in my throat, before taking a plate and sifting through the boxes until I found the right one. Loading my plate, I sat down, sinking into the soft cushions. Only thing missing now was some candles and a drink, and I'd be set for the day.

Natasha gave Tony a pointed look. Two minutes later he picked up his phone and half jogged out the door. That was odd. Tony never jogged.

I looked between Natasha and the door, the pizza forgotten halfway between the plate and my mouth. She looked anywhere but at me, but was saved from a confrontation by her phone ringing. "Gotta take this," she muttered. "Can't prepare enough for the trip." She smiled apologetically and left the room. That was a lie, of course. She had full control; all intel was already read and destroyed. And if something new had come up, I would have been notified too.

Suddenly the plate felt heavy in my hand. Maybe it was naïve, but I had expected Natasha and Tony to respect my wishes; after all I had made it absolutely clear that they should leave it, hadn't I? Their amusement and entertainment wasn't worth being an inconvenience to Bucky.

"What's going on?" Bucky asked when the door clicked behind Natasha.

"I… I don't know," I lied haltingly.

Bucky shrugged. "Oh well. Might as well catch up on some paperwork before the flight too. See you later." With one slice between his teeth and another in his hand, he left the room with a friendly wave.

"Sure. See you." I spoke to his back; the glass door had already closed behind him. The lump in my throat grew. Even though Tony had ordered my favourite pizza, I no longer had any appetite. My mouth was dry, and it was a struggle to swallow. In a fit of frustration, I kicked the table, smacking my toe in the process. The pizza slice slid from the plate and landed on my thigh. "Fuck!"

"Ooh, pizza!"

I spun in my seat. Steve had just arrived, and that made me feel a little bit better at least. He was always a laugh.

"Where is everybody?" He looked around and spotted my moping figure, holding an equally sad slice of pizza. "You okay?"

"I guess," I replied, trying to smile and failing miserably. "Everybody else left. The mission, yeah?"

"Right. I thought everything was planned and okayed."

I couldn't bring myself to fill him in on the situation. If he didn't already know, it was nice to have someone neutral by my side. "Yeah, I don't know."

Their scheme was becoming clear; making Bucky spend time with me alone. But it was a failure. Even he thought it was awkward, and he obviously didn't want to be alone with me. Not that I blamed him. If I was him, I'd do the same.

I glanced at my watch. 12.30. Just then Sam, Bruce, Wanda, and Vision spilled into the room, heading towards the pizza like a herd of hungry goats. Slowly my appetite returned too, and half an hour later the blow to my heart was a painful memory pushed to the back of my mind by excellent pizza and wonderful friends.

Later that day I ran into Tony on the way to the garage. He tried to slip past me, but had to stop when I blocked the door, arms crossed over my chest and puffing myself up as much as I could. "Seriously, Tony! What did you expect to happen, huh? That I'd just throw myself in his arms because we were alone? Because newsflash: I've got both self-control and decency. Do you really think I've never been alone with him before?"

At least he had the decency to look thoroughly chastised, and he mumbled something inaudible I thought maybe sounded like an apology.

No way he was getting away with a tiny one. "What was that? I couldn't quite hear you."

"It was Nat's idea," he said, trying a smirk that didn't work at all.

"I very much doubt that," I replied, dragging a hand over my eyes. "Do I have to call Pepper? I didn't think so," I added when he shook his head. "Do better! Now excuse me. I have a lot of work to do to ensure you actually don't die on this mission." With a final, exaggerated frown, I turned and marched out of the room, ignoring the samba in my chest.

Part 2: Eel infested waters

#bucky barnes x reader #marvel fanfic #good intentions #bucky barnes #marvel #mcu

[theladyofdeath]

Life As We Know It {Chapter 8}

Summary: After the sudden deaths of Nesta’s sister and Cassian’s best friend, they gain guardianship of their nephew, Nyx.

Based on Life As We Know It (2010) and a prompt sent in by anonymous for our Nessian fanfic contest. This is a modern au.

Instead of doing a tag list for this story, we have decided to have a set posting schedule. Chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays and Thursdays. Chapters will be posted on both my and Shelby’s blogs! >> @snelbz​

Life As We Know It Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist

Cassian didn’t have to go into the bar until noon, so until Viviane arrived for her first day at 11:30, it was just him and Nyx.

The sun was out, and Cassian intended to take full advantage of it. Nyx was in his stroller and Cassian was jogging down the side of the Sidra. He’d only had him for the last half hour.

After Cassian’s breakdown last night, Nesta had apparently decided to let Cassian sleep in. Before Nyx could even cry, Nesta had gotten him up, ready, and fed before she left for work that morning.

He was mortified that she’d had to see that, that he’d broken down in front of her like that. But there was so much of Rhys looking at him, all the time and he’d been holding it in for so long. And knowing that he hadn’t been able to figure out what Nyx needed was the final straw last night.

After Nesta had hugged him, he’d finally gotten the strength to pull himself together, and he pulled from her grasp. He’d noticed the dress she wore to go out then, showing just as much skin as that damn towel had, and had made an excuse about being exhausted. He’d shut himself in his room, staring at the ceiling until he fell asleep around two or three in the morning.

He wasn’t surprised she had barely wanted to see him this morning. She probably thought he was an irresponsible mess, probably figured she was better off taking care of Nyx on her own.

And maybe she was.

Nesta had some natural motherly instinct, just like Feyre and Elain had. It was an Archeron trait, Cassian had no doubt.

And although the Archeron sisters certainly hadn’t had a perfect upbringing, the three of them had always had each other.

Cassian couldn’t say the same.

His mom died young.

He’d never had a father.

Or siblings.

Or any other extended family.

He’d just had Rhysand and Azriel, and although fatherhood had come decently easy to both of them, Cassian couldn’t say the same for himself. He was the goofy, unpredictable uncle of the group, he was good in that role.

Not the ideal father figure.

Cassian picked up his speed.

Nyx giggled and threw his hands in the air. 

Regardless of his mood, he couldn’t help but smile down at him.

He loved this kid, and he knew that this kid loved him. He may not be his father, but he would do his damndest to make sure he knew how much he was loved. Every damn day.

*

Cassian had just gotten out of the shower and gotten dressed when he heard the doorbell chime.

Nyx was standing in his playpen, holding onto the padded railing when Cassian rushed to the door, throwing it open.

“Viviane, hey,” he said, opening it wide enough for her to step through. She gave him a polite smile and he shut the door behind her. “Okay, so Nyx is over there, Nesta left a note on the fridge with our cell numbers, the number for her restaurant, my bar, uh, his pediatrician-.”

Viviane laughed quietly and headed for the playpen. “I’ll call you if I need anything, but I’m sure this little dude is going to be an angel.”

She reached down and scooped him up and Nyx did nothing but beam up at her.

“He’s in good hands,” Viviane went on when she saw the worry in Cassian’s eyes.

“I know,” he smiled, although hesitantly. “Nesta will be home at four-thirty.”

“We’re going to have fun,” Viviane promised, and Nyx giggled.

Cassian took that as cue to leave and hurried out the door. It was stressful, leaving him for the first time, alone with someone they had only just met.

He found himself wondering if Rhysand or Feyre would approve.

He prayed they did.

When he got to the bar, Kallias was already there, making sure everything was ready for opening.

“You’re two minutes late, boss,” he teased.

Cassian snorted. “New nanny. Had a hard time leaving.”

Kallias raised a brow. “Hot nanny?” 

Cassian grinned as he came behind the bar. “Just your type, actually.” 

Before the conversation could deepen, Cassian seeing the intrigue in Kal’s eye, he was heading to the store room, grabbing a few bottles to keep within reaching distance when they undoubtedly got a little busy over lunch.

“I like hot nannies,” Kallias hollered. “It would be nice of you to share.”

Cassian snorted, heading back up towards the bar. He didn’t reply, shaking his head as he glanced at his friend, and he set about cutting and readying the garnishes for drinks.

With a dramatic sigh, far louder than it needed to be for Cass to hear him, Kallias began turning on the televisions around the room, two on different sports broadcasts and one on a local music channel.

Maybe he would set Kallias up with Viviane.

Even he had to admit…they’d make a pretty damn cute couple.

*

It was just before 4:30 when Nesta pushed open the front door, prepared to find the house thrown into chaos.

But, it was spotless, Nyx was sleeping, and Viviane was on the couch, reading a book. She looked up at Nesta and smiled.

“You’re home,” she whispered, even though Nyx wasn’t in the room. “He’s been down for about forty-five minutes. We played hard today. I think he’s worn out.”

Nesta blinked, carefully stepping inside and shutting the door behind her. “He was good?”

“Oh, he was great,” Viviane promised, standing up and closing her book with a bookmark placed neatly between it’s pages. “Although, his diaper rash is getting pretty bad. I changed him more often to try and keep him as dry and rash-creamed as possible. But, you may want to keep an eye out. I’ve seen worse, but you still may want to get a prescription from his doctor to help clear it up.”

Nesta hadn’t even noticed that Nyx had had a rash and chastised herself. “Yes. Absolutely, I’ll make him an appointment as soon as I can.”

Viviane smiled again, stopping to grab her purse where it sat by the floor of the couch and dropped her book inside. It was well loved, Nesta could tell, and for a moment, she considered asking what the pretty, young woman was reading.

And then she remembered who she’d been here alone with that morning.

Her eyes popped open. “Oh, gods, I hope Cassian was okay this morning. He’s not…always on his best behavior.”

Viviane brows bunched towards each other, confusion on her face. “I don’t follow?”

“I hope he didn’t say anything too inappropriate,” she rushed out. “He can be a bit much in the mornings, and-.”

“Oh, no, no,” Viviane interrupted, her crystalline eyes going wide. “No, he was an absolute gentleman. On good behavior.” She then added, “And please, don’t mistake my enthusiasm for this job, Nesta, I’m not interested in your husband or anything like-.”

It was Nesta’s turn to interrupt. “Husband?! No, no, Cassian isn’t my husband. Cauldron, no we just have to live together. He’s not even my boyfriend. I can barely stand the guy.”

Viviane hesitated. “Oh, I’m sorry, I just assumed-.”

“It’s alright,” Nesta said, and knew her cheeks were red. “I could see how it would be easy to make that assumption.”

Viviane nodded and rocked back on her heels, uncomfortably. “Right, well...I’ll see you all tomorrow?”

“Absolutely,” Nesta said, trying her best to give a convincing smile.

She knew she was failing.

Convincing smiles weren’t her specialty.

But, husband? As if she would ever marry a man like Cassian. They may have had a moment where they didn’t absolutely loathe each other the night before, but that’s only because he was having a complete mental breakdown.

Nesta may be a bitch, but she wouldn’t kick a man when he’s already down.

Well, at least not in that situation. In a different set of circumstances, perhaps she would. 

Viviane let herself out and Nesta said her goodbyes, and shook her head.

Husband.

Oh, fuck no.

After a quick call to Nyx’s pediatrician, and an appointment made for the following afternoon, Nesta set out to make dinner. Nothing too crazy, just a new recipe she’d been toying with at the restaurant and she needed an unbiased opinion - one from someone whom she didn’t employ - to give her an honest opinion. She knew Cassian would be at the bar until eight-thirty or nine, but the chicken salad would be better chilled anyways.

Or she thought it was. She’d have to ask what he thought about that.

She was halfway through chopping up the roast chicken she’d spiced and marinated all day when the monitor to her left let out a lonely cry. Washing her hands, Nesta was hurrying up the stairs and found Nyx standing in his crib. He immediately reached for her, those blue eyes still drowsy with sleep, but Nesta knew he needed to be changed as soon as she got within sniffing distance. Hopefully he’d be sleepy enough that he wouldn’t fight her on the diaper change.

“What did Cassian feed you for lunch, kiddo?” She asked, scrunching her nose as she unsnapped the onesie he wore, and swapped out his diaper for a clean one.

True to Viviane’s word, Nyx had developed a splotchy, red rash on his bottom. After setting Nyx up in a swing by the door, Nesta took a few minutes to Google what a normal case of diaper rash looked like. Afterwards, she had wiped her search history and was thankful she’d gone ahead and called the pediatrician’s office, especially considering they were now closed until the following morning.

She also had to figure out a way to thank Viviane for her suggestion. Nesta almost felt like she owed the girl an apology for her initial reaction to her, based on her assumptions of Cassian. Not that she had any idea how Nesta had felt, but she still felt bad.

She may know a few things about Cassian Nazari, but she knew nothing about Viviane, not yet. Nesta should really give her the benefit of the doubt.

Even though such a thing was not her specialty.

The second they walked into the kitchen, Nyx was crying and reaching toward the fridge. Nesta put him in his high chair, letting him cry it out as she fixed him supper.

In the meantime, she dumped a pile of strawberry puffs on his tray.

He was immediately stuffing them into his mouth.

“You know, I’ve tasted those and they’re not all that great,” Nesta said, preparing him a small bowl of sweet potatoes.

Nyx looked at her and held up a star-shaped puff. 

She couldn’t help but chuckle. “No, but thank you for the offer.”

Nesta finished her salad and put the rest in the fridge for Cassian to eat once he got home. After taking a seat, and placing her salad and Nyx’s potatoes on the table, she dug in.

It was, obviously, delicious.

Nyx even seemed to be enjoying his sweet potatoes, though, as always more ended up on his high chair’s tray than in his mouth.

“You have an art for making a mess, buddy,” she said, shaking her head as she lifted another spoonful of the sweet potatoes to his mouth.

He took the bite into his mouth, and sprayed most of it back out in a raspberry.

She raised an eyebrow, setting the bowl down in front of her. “You’re just playing at this point, aren’t you?”

To say yes, in fact, he was, Nyx smacked a chubby hand into the mushed up mix of puffs and sweet potato on his tray.

“That means it’s bath time and then bed time,” she mused, wiping as much of him down as she could. She decided to go ahead and ditch his smeared onesie in the laundry room, and carried a diapered Nyx up to the bathroom.

A mostly uneventful bath later, she discovered Viviane must have been telling the truth about playing hard today. Nyx had been asleep before she’d made it through the second page of his favorite book, his pacifier falling out of his full, little lips.

She gently laid him down in the crib, and tiptoed downstairs to flip through bad reality TV until Cassian got home.

She hated how much she had thought about Cassian throughout the day. For once, it wasn’t about his body. Instead, it was about the fact that he had spent five minutes in her arms the night before, sobbing. She wasn’t sure what to think.

Cassian had a rough exterior. 

He was known for his good looks and how many women those looks attracted. Since Nesta met him five years prior, there were only a handful of things she could say about Cassian.

He was beautiful, but that much was obvious.

He knew how to make beautiful instruments, which meant he was good with his hands.

Nesta would be lying if she said she hadn’t thought about just how good he was with those hands.

Lastly, Cassian was cocky as hell. He was hot. He knew he was hot. And he had to convince everyone who didn’t think he was hot that he was hot.

But, one thing that Nesta hadn’t known about Cassian until the night before?

He cared.

He really, really cared.

And he was scared.

She had been willing to put aside their differences for Nyx. They’d come to that agreement when he’d begun to depend on them. But now, she wanted to make things work…for him. He was terrified of letting Rhys down, something she understood. Every time she thought of something she may have done wrong, all she could think about was how disappointed Feyre would be in her.

Except…she knew that wasn’t true. Just like she knew that Rhys would never be disappointed in Cassian. The fact that he’d stepped up, had been willing to care for Rhys and Feyre’s only child…

She just had to make sure Cassian believed it.

Nesta was half asleep on the couch when the door unlocked and opened, Cassian walking through. He blinked once upon seeing her, clearly not having expected her to be downstairs when he got home.

“Hey,” she said, stretching. “How was your day?”

He tossed his keys on the table by the door, looking around, pointedly not looking at her. “It was good. Where’s Nyx?”

“He’s been down since seven-thirty or so, Viviane did great today,” she said, watching him as he walked into the kitchen. “I owe you an apology. You were right, she’s good.”

She heard a grunt of acknowledgment as the fridge opened. He came back into the living room, shaking up a bottled protein shake and cracking it open.

“I made a roasted chicken salad,” she said. “I put leftovers in the fridge for you.” “That’s okay,” he said, voice low. “You can take it to work with you tomorrow. Don’t want to take your food.”

Nesta blinked. “I put it in the fridge for you-.”

“I’m tired,” he said, heading toward the stairs. “Night.”

Nesta’s mouth opened, then shut, then opened again. “I’m sorry, what?”

Cassian stopped at the foot of the stairs and looked over his shoulder. “What?”

I made you dinner. I stayed up to make sure you were alright. “Nothing. Just didn’t realize you were so insistent on being an asshole this evening.”

“An asshole?” he repeated. “I just got home, I’m tired, and now I’m an asshole?” 

Nesta just shook her head, falling back on the couch. “Nevermind. Goodnight.” 

Cassian just stood there, looking half like he wanted to go upstairs and half like he wanted to chuck the half-empty bottle at the back of her head. He’d already had a long, horrible day full of shitty, rude customers. He hadn’t even realized it was nearing Spring Break until the underage kids with shitty, fake ID’s had descended on the bar today. The amount of customers he had to turn away since they were practically children possibly outweighed the actual customers he and Kal had served.

He’d also had Nesta on his mind all day, on the pity she had to feel for him after he lost it the night before. The fact that she made him dinner was just proof of it, that he was right.

“You didn’t need to make me dinner,” he said, staring at the wall behind her head. “I can take care of myself, alright?”

Nesta’s eyes were closed, her arms crossed as she laid back on the couch. “I didn’t say that you couldn’t.”

“Just because I lost it for a minute last night, doesn’t mean that I’m helpless,” Cassian went on. “I’m just as capable of taking care of Nyx, of being a grown ass adult, as you are.”

Nesta’s eyes opened, then, and she slowly looked over to him. “Is that right?”

“Yeah, it is,” he said, simply.

“Really?” Nesta asked. “Because you’re acting like a gods damned child right now.”

Cassian snorted as he shook his head. “I don’t have the patience for you tonight. Goodnight.”

“You’re a real dick, you know that?” Nesta snapped.

“It’s all you think I’m good for, so I guess I may as well act like it, too,” he called out, not turning back to look at her.

The words struck her, made her feel two feet tall, especially considering how she’d begun to regard him instead. But she wasn’t able to stop the bite of her words as she snapped, “Oh, fuck you.”

Cassian didn’t say a word as he topped the stairs and headed down the hall.

She almost wished he’d slammed the door, almost wished he’d made a spectacle of being angry and shutting her out again, after what she’d thought may have been progress the night before. 

It was almost that much worse that his door shut with a soft click.

#nessian #nesta #cassian #modern au #fanfic #sjm #collab #shara #shacmc

[collecting-stories]

Sext - JJ Maybank

Request: I know you got a lot of requests already but if possible, could you do JJ x reader where the reader sends him a dirty text while they’re hanging out with the pouges? 

A/N: I’ve never sent a dirty text and I’m terrible at them!!

Outer Banks Masterlist

✰ ✰ ✰ ✰

JJ sat on the other end of the couch, Pope in between the two of you, Kiara, Sarah, and John B on the other couch as the five of you watched the movie Sarah had chosen for movie night. Kiara had been the first to suggest having a movie night, just the five of you relaxing, no parties, while your parents were out of town. You leaned back on the couch, looking over at JJ as he tried to jam a handful of popcorn into his mouth. Not exactly the most attractive thing in the world but you had known JJ long enough to have seen him in some fairly compromising positions. Shoving popcorn in his face wasn’t the most attractive but it wasn’t the least attractive either.  

You glanced his way again as the movie continued and JJ looked over, winking at you before turning back to face forward. Though neither of you had said anything to your friends, you and JJ had been dating for a few weeks now, since he’d slept over at your house for a couple days to stay away from his own. You had both agreed not to tell anyone, at least not yet. He’d sat further away from you, seemingly on purpose, but that didn’t mean you had to sit through this boring movie without bothering him just a little bit.  

You sat up a little, pulling your phone out of you back pocket. JJ was exceptionally good at dirty texts. He sent them all the time, on an almost consistent basis, and you never knew what to say back. Usually you just sat there flushed, staring at the screen until finally you just gave up and tried to start a new conversation. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to be good at texting JJ like that, you thought about replying all the time, thought about being able to make him squirm the same way he made you squirm.  

-I wish we were alone right now-  

It was a weak start but it was something. You didn’t want to jump in wholeheartedly but you had taken some pictures a few days ago and as often as your mom sent you articles about ‘the dangers of sexting’ you’d taken them with the express desire to send them to JJ.  

He pulled his phone out of his pocket, seeing your name on the screen and glancing over at you curiously, before unlocking his phone to read the message. You did your best to keep yourself facing forward, watching the movie instead of being obvious and watching JJ. You wanted him to retaliate just so you could keep messaging him, go further into this moment where the two of you could exist alone while your friends sat right there, completely unaware.

-Yeah, whys that?-

Now was the real hurtle. The dirty talk part you were so bad at that you should’ve known better than to start this. It was definitely something you couldn’t finish. You tried to think of a reply that sounded even remotely sexy, everything you’d read online, and you’d done an embarrassing about of research on the topic, only felt cheesy and lame and you definitely would’ve broken up with you if you read one of those. And afterall, this was JJ, who shoved popcorn in his mouth and said dumb shit to you all the time that was arguably more embarrassing than a few texts about why you wanted him alone. You knew why. But the saying it part was hard, because despite all the dumb stuff JJ said, he could be pretty descriptive when he wanted to and it never sounded lame.  

You should’ve just sent him a picture, you had a fairly decent collection, most taken Kylie Jenner style on the floor of your bedroom in front of the mirror, but now it would seem out of place, or maybe you were just over thinking things.  

-cat got your tongue?-  

JJ texted you again and when you looked over at him he grinned. It was that sure fire, ‘you started this’ look that he always gave you when you tried to flirt and failed miserably. You angled your phone away from Pope because if you were already embarrassed you’d be even more so with him sitting there between you, catching a glimpse of your phone as you pulled up the camera roll. You found one that didn’t quite give everything away, you sitting just so that you were covered but also naked. There were others with lingerie on but maybe you’d save them for random whenever’s. You sent it along with a promising ‘pictures worth a thousand words’ hoping that was okay.  

You peeked over, watching for JJ’s reaction, smiling when he sunk down further on the couch, biting his lip.  

-when did you take this-

He’d been at your house the last couple days and he definitely would’ve remembered you having a photo shoot. You didn’t answer, just sent another one. Angled again, but giving away more than the last one. He shifted again, clearly uncomfortable in a good way, as he looked over at you. This time though, you kept your eyes on the movie, phone turned over in your lap as you tried not to give him the satisfaction of your gaze.  

Before he could answer, simply because you were enjoying having him be the one who was flustered and looking like he didn’t know how to proceed, you sent him the full on picture that you had been completely embarrassed to take but had resolved yourself to. You put your phone back in your lap, face down so no one could see if JJ texted you back and you glanced over, watching him open it, his whole face going red as he shifted in the seat again.  

“Dude, stop moving,” Pope elbowed him, glaring at JJ. He’d been squirming in his seat since the first text you sent and he was sure he annoying everyone but he really didn’t care about anyone but you and the pictures you’d sent him.  

“Sorry, sorry.” He got up hastily, phone clutched his hand so fiercely that his knuckles were white. You heard the bathroom door slam down the hall and Pope stretched out, happy to have more room now that JJ was gone.  

You waited for anything. A text back, some kind of appreciative message confirming that he liked the pictures. Instead there was nothing, no reply since the first picture and even that hadn’t been anything other than a piqued interested in when the picture was taken. When more than 15 minutes passed and Kiara mentioned that JJ was still holed up in the bathroom, you offered to check on him.  

“Be careful.” John B joked and you rolled your eyes as you headed down the hall. The bathroom was toward the end, far enough away that no one could see the door. You knocked, looking back down the hall as a somewhat out of breath ‘one minute’ sounded on the other side of the door.  

“Jay?” You asked, ready to knock again when the door flung open and JJ pulled you inside the bathroom. You bite back a surprised yelp, knowing that alerting the others would not bode well for either of you. He let the door swing closed again as you pushed you up against the sink, lifting you so he could stand between your legs. Hands on your bare thighs and you didn’t even get a moment to breath when he started kissing you, feverish almost and you grabbed the back of his head to keep him there. It didn’t last long as he left a trail of wet kisses down your neck, doing his best not to leave any visible marks on you. “And here I was, worried you didn’t like the pictures,” you teased, slightly out of breath as you spoke.  

JJ pulled away so he could look at you, leaning in close as his hands moved from your thighs to your ass, trying to shimmy your body into his. “Are you kidding? Fucking hell, you can send me nudes any day. In fact,” he kissed you to punctuate his new idea, you should send me like one nude every day for the rest of our lives.”

“Assuming we live for a while…I’ll probably get old and wrinkly.”  

“Don’t care.” He shrugged.  

“How romantic,” you teased, tapping his shoulder, “we should go back out, they’ll wonder where we are.”  

“Fine.” JJ groaned, stepping away from you. While you slid off the counter, JJ finished zipping up and buttoning his shorts.  

“Wait, did you come in here to-“

“My fucking gorgeous girlfriend sent me naked pics, what do you think?”  

You smiled, any nervousness from before melting away as you followed JJ down the hall to where your friends were. Kiara looked over, seemingly uninterested in more than the fact that you had returned, remarking that you both missed the best part of the movie. You apologized, sitting down on Pope’s left side and pulling your legs up onto the couch. As Sarah suggested another movie, someone else’s pick this time, you looked over at JJ and he winked at you.  

- 

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