#i take care of myself i take care of my siblings

[ewwww-what]

an archdevil and a presidential candidate sneak into a gay bar

flatcolor + closeups below :)

#they love each other so much you guys don’t understand #they’ve lived together for years. they have seen each other at their worst. #THEY HAVE CHOSEN EACH OTHEROVER EVERYTHING SO MANY TIMES #ITS ALL ABOUT FRIENDSHIP #ITS ALL ABOUT THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE #ITS ALL ABOUT TAKING CARE OF EACH OTHER #my brother just brought me fettuccine alfredo #which is an important addon to this post #(it’s all about taking care of each other) #BY THE WAY #I understand the ‘they are sisters’ response to lots of my bad girls posts but I need to make it so clear that it’s more than that #not to be that guy because I do get it but I’m in a constant state of twisting myself around my art to avoid some things #and something I get a bunch is people seeing things as either ‘they’re siblings’ or ‘they’re dating’ when neither was my intention #because what I’m trying to get across here isn’t romantic and it’s not really sisterly either. love is such a wide range beyond that #+ and I want those types of love to also be understood within my art y’know #all that to say that it’s not that deep and they love each other very very much any way you slice it #d20 #d20 fantasy high #dimension 20 #d20 fanart #fantasy high #fhjy #kristen applebees #fig faeth #fig fantasy high #kristen fantasy high #kristen chilis applebees #fantasy high fanart #undescribed #my art

[curioscurio]

Got up early (for me), ate a light and healthy breakfast, applied to some jobs, took a long mental health walk with the dogs, gave one of them a bath, and even did some phone calls and messaging regarding my medication and pharmacy problems and managed to sort it out without breaking down!!! And! Showered!! Kicking ASS at mental health today

#im studying myself like a bug. with no judgement or compulsive self hate when i see the results. and then doing something different based on #those results #and its working #ive noticed that im much more productive when i have someone else to help or listen to. its a little uh sad because im not easily able to #to take care of myself and do things for MYSELF. but if its for someone else then its like i gain momentum #going out to clean out MY car? well i dont care how gross it is im not worth the effort. #cleaning out my car for my brother who i drive to therapy every other week? fuck yes its going to be nice and clean because therapy is impo #rtant and i want to help you stick with it and so we make it not a chore but lighthearted sibling time #like do you get it #anyway slow progress is still progress #the number of good days are slowly catching up to the number of bad days #post beginning of the pandemic 2020 was so brutal on me. moving back in with my parents especially #but i have a plan now . a real one. and friends to help me as well ! #oops rambling in the tags haha #long tags

[skylardoesthings]

Can i just say, I love how similar Bonnie and Clemont are, in personality and manarisms, but also the fact that they are complete opposites of each other,

#sky rambles #pokemon xy #anipoke #pokeani #pokemon bonnie #pokemon clemont #theyre both so energetic and cheerful- they're full of life and love and care #like #the way clemont treats bonnie rubs off on her on the way she treats pokemon #theyre both so passionate and theyre both just makes me ☹️☹️☹️ /pos #i think i love the two of them a lot is because they remind me of myself and my siblings #with how vastly similar yet different they are #bonnie hypes clemont up a lot - and would also tease him #and clemont takes care of bonnie but also scolds and makes sure she still learns #(also! clemont and korrina also have a lot of similarities!)

[flowerywhispers]

Mu Qing is a million times stronger than I am, I would have jumped Hua Cheng and tried to kill him, uncaring of the fact that it would kill me first, when I saw the red pearl earring

#I would jump my siblings if they took something of my mums and I got accused of taking it but then that something risks my life and the #trust of the people I care about and I looked for it for 800 years only to find out that it was stolen by SOMEONE ELSE #I would have killed everyone in the place and then myself immediately after or just straight up set the place on fire #tgcf #tian guan ci fu #tgcf mu qing #mu qing

[loveandscience]

not me, fevered and with covid watching Earthspark and crying at the thought of having siblings that love you that much

#did manage to make myself cancel sessions #spent yesterday in and out of fevers and sleep #slightly better today but everything still hurts #i actually was going to try to make myself work yesterday and was 'working up' to it #but then school called and wanted me to pick up kiddo and after that just 'collapsed' with fever on the couch #used what little strength i had to cancel sessions and take care of kiddo until husband got home #personal #earthspark #transformers #maybe it's a little grief over not getting to have close sibling relationships bc my mom pit us against each other

[baconcolacan]

Hi hi!! Just a little update from me!!

I’m going to travel to Japan today, on a little business trip/bid to visit my relatives. Meaning I might be slightly unavailable for a while or maybe even the whole day!

Sorry for the slight radio silence!

#neil’s corner #blep! #I worry over leaving my baby siblings behind #as like I said our parents often went away a lot to support us #leaving only myself to take care of my siblings #this is actually gonna be the first time I’M leaving them behind #but one of them is old enough now and I have other relatives to look after them #Its just gonna be weird for them not having my parents AND me there #lol yeah this is why this is hidden in the tags #xP

[theghostofwilburtheworm]

IM BEING TAKEN TO WATCH KFP4 AGAINST MY WILL AAA

#i really did not wanted to see this movie cuz i care way too much abt the kfp franchise áaaaa #but my lil brother wants to go bc his friends invited him and my dad cant go with him and his mom also cant so i have to go #worst thing is that all of my siblings now want to go and so now i cant refuse (they will not let me..) #sigh i have to go take care of the youngsters #smth smth that post abt being born to b a deadbeat older brother forced to b a responsiible older sister/j/j #i do like my lil siblings i just dont want to subject myself to kfp4 sigh #personal #gh0ost txt

[ark1os]

.

I didnt know the tags woulr be so much i shouldve just wrote a long vent 😭😭😭 rip

#lol. there are still times where my brain goes omg what if you’re really a narc #and then i go out of my way to make sure my friends are as comfortable as possible and thati meet all their needs and i apologize every few #minutes for something silly or for maybe hurting them unintentionally and then i remember of #every fallout w people in my life where i was always taking responsibility for my actions n for my role to what led to the fallouts no #matter how toxic the person was and i remember all the times i geniunely apologized to my siblings for my mistakes (without them pointing #out i did smth wrong) and i remember all the tomes someone told me i hurt them and i owned up to it and apologized and then i go #oh ywa. maybe not ? #bonus: all the times i helped someone out in secret to bring some ease in their life without ever telling them or bragging eith it or #using it against them or reminding them that i did x y z for them #and then all the times where my guilt ate me up at nights and i cried and the times where i brought out the best of people because my love #is Nuturing. yea #AND I GUESS THE FACT THAT MY EX BEST FRIEND TOLD ME IM A NARC AND I STRAIGHT UP WENT OMG YEA! PROBABLY! BECAUSE I WOULDVE BELIEVED HER #ANYTHING 😭😭😭😭 BECAUSE INWAS SO SURE SHE KNEW ME BETTER THAN I KNEW MYSELF! 😭😭😭 #BECAUSE I HAD LOST MYSELF COMPLETELY IN THE FRIENDSHIP 😭😭😭😭 NOT VERY NARC OF ME 😭😭😭😭😭😭 #but yea. i guess abandonment issues apathy and lack of communication skills (which leads to passive aggressivness) will make you look like a #narc i get where she came from! but still. if i ever see someone diagnose other people i will simply tell them to shut up #especially based on sentences taken out of context. not very sexy #and also very stupid. #rationally seen i shouldve kicked out the thought that im probably not one when my therapist told me theres no chance i am but. when you get #treated like a freaking mondter from the people you’ve trusted deeply. it does something to you >.> #also when my therapist said that she has No rights to make Any diagnosis or statements about other people because whatever i tell her its #going to tell her more about me than them. i shouldve just dtopped believing it honestly. like freaking sideeye to those therapists thst #told my ex friends im a narc. and a big fat kiss to my therapist for being such a beautiful empathstic underztanding patient beautiful and #kind person #alhamdulillah ^-^ #kicked out the thought thst i am one * #and also a big fat sorry for being hsving no empathy. my communication skills are getting brtter and im working on my abandonment issues #(sfter being abandoned by my closest friends and family hello this is so sexy of me) and im soooo much more st peace w myself n i like and #care aboyt myself ^-^ even just writing a list of positive things ahout me is smth i wouldve never done two years ago #(also my family took me back alhamdulillah eheh)

[sastiel-is-my-serotonin]

I know I don't need to explain or anything but I've been distant with my accounts recently because I have a lot of things I'm taking care of. For instance my ID and school. Not only for myself but for my siblings, so my spare time is going into that and sleep. Hopefully I'll get back into it when things level out. But today I was barely home because I was getting my ID and then I was at the hospital with my sister. She's okay, but there's been some scares this week. So yeah, I'm taking time for myself for once. I'm allowing myself to be human while still caring for my younger siblings.

#i am a primary caretaker for my two younger siblings #and that's a job that never stops #then there's taking care of things for myself #by the end of the day i justvwant to sleep lol #but hopefully soon i can create again

[rainybraindays]

No but the obsession with Colin's theoretical sex life is crazy to me.

Like people are genuinely upset that he could have potentially had sex?? Shaming him for doing something we know hes been mocked about for not doing? Like we see Anthony accuse him of only trying to marry because hes a virgin, you all remember that right? His older brother sees him pursuing a relationship, something he would have noticed earlier if he hadn't been so single minded the entire time, and instead of offering any like useful advice immediately goes and throws that in his face.

If he wanted to have sex just so it couldn't be used against him ever again I wouldn't be surprised. If he did that's fine, and if he doesn't thats literally also fine.

Like maybe its the fact that I also see a lot of people who talk about him needing to be a virgin talk about him being nerodivergent, so it seems kinda infantlizing to me, especially mixed in with the need to portray him like hes stupid but this rubs me so wrong.

Its literally a non-issue why are some of you so hard up on this.

#rainy talks #not tagging because i simply do not care too #you can take or leave this post but I just cannot stop thinking about this #like hes in his early 20s hes a grown up and is allowed to experiment in his sex life prior to settling down #there is no need to be SO upset about this. #like idk maybe its just the insecure younger sibling in me #but if I had been trying to lock down a relationship and it blew up in my face #and beforehand my older sibling had thrown my virginity in my face #I'd kinda wanna get rid of it #just as a fuckin defense mechanism so if i decided to try for another relationship it couldn't be used to humiliate me?? #i dunno just a thought #but hey what do I know this literally isn't a situation I've ever found myself in because my older siblings treat me like an adult #but thats a conversation for a different time.

[vanibear]

as a fellow oldest sibling i think we need to talk more abt how axelea is affected by eldest daughter syndrome

#'none of the surrounding adults are taking care of these kids so now they are My responsibility' #'i have to protect them and seem like everything is ok and ive got everything together when i really just have every problem ever' #'im showing favoritism and i want to kill myself for feeling that way' #'why are my younger siblings fundamentally better people than i am msupposed to be the role model here' but also 'i have to save them from #etc etc. at this point i think it will just be me projecting #but like. even tho hes back together w everyone i feel he must have some unresolved trauma over what hes been through for these kids #imo hes got issues that still exist and should be addressed #axelea #kh #kingdom hearts #kat post

[thepinklink]

greetings and salutations and hi and hello and *hugs you*

you’re a beautiful and wonderful soul and we love seeing you around here and you have a great sense of humor and *shakes you* I will filter out the blues from your wonderful head by means of centrifugal force *throws you in a blender /aff*

*hugs you back*

Jehehtnbensnfnnsbasjnffnnwnss thank you anon <3

You’re so sweet, the blues are definitely leeching away 🫂🥰

#I discovered it may be due to PMS #I’m supposed to start next week #but also I’m famously bad at taking care of myself #and I grew up with 5 siblings #but right now they’re at mum’s house and I’m at dad’s house #so it’s just me and my dad #but he’s working #so I’ve been alone when I’m not necessarily the type of person left alone #and combine that with not taking care of myself properly #I’m lonely and I feel bad but I’ve got few ways to take care of it #and it’s hard to be open with my dab #because i just have a hard time communicating with him #i love him very much #so he didn’t do anything wrong don’t mistake me #i’m just also bad at communicating #XD #which is why I’m telling you all this #because I’m lonely and I feel bad and unfortunately #i wear my heart on my sleeve #and I talk a lot #and one day that will get me hurt so it scares me #see #i just dumped a bunch of details to you #I’m too open for my own good XD #ANYWAYS #ahahahahahahahahhaa knock knock #interrupting cow #MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO #lovely anon #thank you for the ask! 🩷

[astral-catastrophe]

Shoutout to all the eldest daughters who had to basically raise their siblings. You’ve done the best you can, and I’m proud of you

#Really just. Venting my frustrations over having to live like this #I was eight. Eight years old and I had to watch and take care of a five year old and a two year old #I had to make food and clean and care for them #I was eight and already then I had wanted to die #I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the moment things settled and the responsibility had lifted from my shoulders somewhat #Then that’s when the severe anxiety started #Then again. Still too fucking young to be playing in an adults world I had to take care of them again #And again #and again and again #youre the parents. You’re supposed to do this #It should never be the eldest daughter’s concerns over money and food and over keeping these kids alive #Then people wonder why I forget to care for myself. And why I’m always so worried for others while #Disregarding myself #Just look at the childhood and you’ll see I never had time to worry for myself or to heal and I don’t think I can now #Because again I have to join an adults world and play at their game to make sure my siblings don’t fall the way I have #I was eight years old and I wanted to die. Now I’m almost seventeen and I want the same. #Because it seems the only way to get me out of this #I know it’s wrong I know it’s wrong I know it’s wrong #I can’t let the siblings fall the same way I have #jays venting again

[cordiallyfuturedwight]

.

#my friend sent me a gift that is so like by definition ordinary but just makes me feel so cared for on a deep level that I’m over here like #🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓 #i love my friends SO much???? #how we’re they all given to me???? #they are my siblings in life #i am NOTHING WITHOUT THEM LIKE 😭😭😭😭😭 #sorry on my period ✌️✌️✌️✌️ #I just can’t believe I moved hours away from my whole life and still found people who love me this much #I do not take it for granted 😭 #idk I just had to…. say this #I need to figure out how to express myself better lol #for now. I will cry

[sammygender]

listened to three episodes of mabel (the podcast) yesterday. SO good, holy shit. i’ve been meaning to listen for years and i get it immediately. just the first episode was so good. turns out i’m not actually that hard to get into podcasts i just haven’t been finding the right ones…

#i KNOW wtnv is meant to be good. i know i know i know. and the vibes are on peak!! i loooove the energy!!’ #But nothing happens. bro. nothing fucking happens. not yet at least #im sorryyyy i need stuff to grip me!!! i enjoy wtnv when i listen to it but i can never listen consistently bc i never ever find myself #wanting to know what happens next #i mean sure i’m only a couple episodes in #but #is the whole show like this?? or does it get more….. plotty? character driven? #it’s got such a huge fan base on here but then again this is the site that can turn anytning into a fan base #same applies for. like. the penumbra podcast. idk i think i tried to start it and i was just like… don’t care. sorry #i have such an I don’t care. issue with media in general. i don’t tend to watch tv alone because i WILL just switch it off. i gotta pick #something and CHOOSE ok i am watching this for the next few weeks! and then set designated times to watch it with my siblings #its just like mehhhh. idk. im picky and i can take mediocrity and find gold in it but i have to be submerged in the mediocrity for that to #happen #but like anyway. wolf 359 is one of my favourite things ever and i thought it was funny and a cool concept at first but it probably would’ve #ended up like every other podcast if i hadn’t told my brother about it and he hasn’t immediately binged the first season #told me it was fucking amazing #and therefore motivated me to speed through until i got to the endish of s1 and went Oh yeah this is some GOOD SHIT. #so maybe i just gotta do that with more stuff??? #but anyway. mabel is reaaalllly good #mabel podcast #oliver talks

[mephilver]

.

#im very very against crying because it just makes my head hurt and my face ugly #but because im so against crying i havent been able to sleep in months because #i keep having dreams of myself violently sobbing but i have to be super chill about everything #im not allowed to cry im the only one who doesnt cry thats the value i offer to my dying brother #is that im the only person not visibly mourning him yet #i almost cried at the doctor because they asked me how many siblings i had #its so fucking stupid i know #and i feel so bad like i abandoned him but he was slipping farther and farther every day it was horrible having to arrange hospice for him #then he agreed to the third surgery he never wanted to have but insurance didnt cover it #but 3 days later the surgeon did it out of pocket and now hes on new chemo but im still not with him #i ran away and gave my room to his mother so she could be with her dying son and i could catch a break #but it doesnt feel like a break im still constantly on the verge of tears and even though he chose to spend his last months with me #i chose to high tail it to another state because i couldnt stand the sight of him #he wouldnt let me take care of him anyways because im his baby sister 19 years younger than him and its a pride/shame thing i get it #whatever im done now i will always have video games