#i spent so long as a kid writing all my characters white

[vagabond-umlaut]

paper planes

brother to fushiguro tsumiki. (unofficially adopted) son to gojo satoru and you. nephew to a host of sorcerer uncles and aunts. (unwilling) assistant to the white-haired idiot. and, finally, ringbearer at your and gojo's still-undetermined wedding.

one teeny-tiny boy with one too many identity is what fushiguro megumi is - until he isn't. with lots and lots of sniffles and sniggers...

▸ gojo satoru x fem! reader; established relationship; post hidden inventory arc; manga spoilers; proposals; adoptions; alternate universe happy for everyone except toji lovers (sorry ＞︿＜)

▸ two fics in a week, wow. guess this is what is called a brainrot, huh? read this post by @/mintmatcha on tumblr and started writing this lol. but the plot of this story is miles, tons, eons away from that post, i swear. also, this fic is set in the same universe as blue hawaii but you need not read that first to read this. treat this as a stand-alone if you wanna! 😊 anyways, gif, divider and characters ain't mine. please don't plagiarize, translate or repost this. enjoy reading! ❤️

"yeah, yeah, i've got it all planned."

a discreet eye roll is all megumi gives as he goes through the menu card in his hands. a little distance away, he can spy tsumiki and you seated at a table, you tying his sister's long hair into braids while the latter laughs, probably at a joke you cracked.

a tiny smile rests on the little boy's face at the sight - which vanishes when he feels a large hand tousle his hair. you had spent hours and hours righting his hair into a proper shape; why must this idiot always mess everything up?

megumi looks up to find his guardian looking down at him with a shit-eating grin; though he can clearly see the nerves it's covering.

idiot.

phone wedged in between his ear and shoulder, gojo mutters a "one sec, suguru," and crouches down to the boy's eye level. the latter gives back an unimpressed stare.

"decided what you wanna have, 'gumi? remember mom and sis there asked you to choose for them today."

megumi feels an urge to say you two aren't his real parents - but stamps it down instantly. the both of you have been as good as real parents can be to their kids - or maybe even better. the boy has read books, watched movies and listened to his classmates talk about their families; the tiny urchin-head knows.

with a huff, he points at the double chicken fillet burger box - it's tsumiki's favourite and you too don't seem to dislike it. with a nod, gojo rises and placing his orders, returns to the call, beaming expression again directed at megumi.

"yeah, yeah, don't worry, man," he speaks into the phone, then drops his volume to a mere whisper, "'my little kiddo here is a born actor. he remembers the entire plan, step by step - don't you, buddy?"

megumi gives an imperceptible nod, itching back to get back to the table. he already would have - needless to say, the little munchkin prefers your company to gojo's, way way more - but their orders have not been delivered yet and the boy promised to be-

a little tap on the shoulder draws him from his musings and he cranes his neck up to find gojo frowning. "no, megumi didn't want to discuss the plan with me before leaving. no, he doesn't like you better- hey," the man looks at him, sunglasses sliding down the bridge of his nose revealing his indignant gaze, "you wanna discuss with uncle suguru one last time?"

an indifferent shrug is all the reply he gives.

while uncle suguru isn't the best uncle he has, he isn't the worst either. the others are- oh, wait. the others include uncle kento and uncle yu. they are literal angels compared to him. so... maybe... he is the worst... never mind. it's too late to back out anyways.

grumbling, gojo hands him the phone. "hello uncle," megumi greets just like you and tsumiki have taught him to. the man behind mutters something along the lines of ''traitor" or something; the boy pays him no mind.

"hey champ," the voice floats over the line, pleasant, kind and the way people talk to babbling babies. megumi's bored face turns irritated. "let's discuss the semantics one last time before boarding your flight, okay?"

"yeah, okay," megumi says, and casting a sideways glance at his bundle-of-nerves guardian, continues, "we're going to reykjavik," he looks at gojo, silently asking if he pronounced it correctly. the man sends him a thumbs-up with an encouraging grin.

the kid continues, "the plane will land at noon day after tomorrow, which is mom's birthday. first, we will go to the hotel. then, after resting, in the evening, we will head out in a car to watch the northern lights. and then-"

"-when it's the right moment, your dad will pop the question to your mom and you'll click the camera. got it, mr. future ringbearer?" finishing the rest of the sentence for him, the man at the other end asks, sounds of pans clacking and food sizzling in the background. nana-chan and mimi-chan must have woken up.

megumi nods. "yeah, got it, mr. future best man."

a chuckle comes in response to his comment. "you're a lot like your mom, y'know?"

"yeah," he mumbles, waving back to you and tsumiki, a little smile on his otherwise-impassive-but-always-adorable face, "i know."

"good," the man says, then pauses when a loud crash booms through the air and through the phone, a set of two wailing voices following it not soon after. megumi can quite literally picture the wincing frown his uncle is wearing as he says the next words in a hurry, "okay, 'gumi. talk to you later. bye, and best of luck! satoru's counting on his little assistant."

"yeah, thanks," he responds but is too late - the call is already cut by then.

giving the phone back to gojo, who's tapping his sneakers-clad feet on the floor, he looks back ahead, wondering when the hell heck their token number will be displayed and when they will get their food.

to the kid's great relief, it doesn't take a lot of time.

before long, the four of you are seated around the table, gojo stealing a sip from your drink and you stealing fries from him, all the while tsumiki giggles loudly at your antics. megumi smiles, before he hides it behind the burger which he takes a bite from.

the four of you really look like a family, don't you?

"hey, guys, can i have your attention for a sec, please?" your sudden question startles him from his mind. the boy turns to find you with your usual grin, albeit a smidgen of anxiety can be found in the way your fingers drum on the table.

megumi shares a look with tsumiki and gojo. they look as confused as he feels. "do i have your attention, people?" you ask again, manner growing a tad solemn unlike your usual, though the affection is still evident in your tone.

gojo and tsumiki nod immediately. you turn to him, gently smiling, "can i have your attention too, 'gumi? please?"

the boy nods his head instantly. "yeah, yeah. sure," he replies, scooting his chair closer to yours. you send him a relieved smile. "good, 'cause what i'm going to say next is very important. so, listen to me carefully, 'kay?"

all three of them are eager to nod in affirmation and anticipation.

scouring through your backpack, you retrieve a couple of pretty important-looking papers, and placing them back on the table, clasp your hands atop them. the kid spots gojo shoot you a worried look to which you respond with a reassuring smile.

the man's frown fades a little.

gaze now darting from one kid to another, you begin, "you two know, right, we love you very much?"

"yeah!" tsumiki exclaims, but is quick to fall silent when megumi shoots her a glare. you proceed, lips pressing into a thin line, "but we cannot adopt you two, in spite of how much all us want it to happen. we tried to, many, many times. but those higher-ups just won't let us do that."

a second passes - one wherein his young brain registers your words - before, lower lip wobbling, the boy casts his gaze down upon his light-up sneakers.

is this where you'll say he'll be sent to those zen'ins? away from his sister? away from you and gojo? away from all his uncles, aunts, nana-chan and mimi-chan?

megumi feels a hand card through his locks gently. looking up, he finds you with a soft smile. "but the thing is 'toru and i didn't let them defeat our purpose. we thought, you two can choose to be my clan's wards. not 'toru's, because of fucking - sorry, please forget i said that word - i meant, idiotic clan politics. so, what do you think?"

megumi turns to his sister, a pensive look plastered on her face the way it is on his. gojo adds, a tender smile in place of his usual stupid grin, "no pressure, kids. the both of us won't love you two any less and will be equally fine in case you choose not to."

"you guys can take how much ever time you need to think. there's no hurry," megumi hears you say, your warm hand rubbing circles on his back, as he turns back to his half-eaten burger.

a long moment passes.

passengers enter the cafeteria, they leave the cafeteria. the four of you remain seated, quietly munching on your food.

the boy finally removes his gaze from his now-empty tray and sends an inquiring, confused, hopeful look to his sister. tsumiki smiles back with a tiny nod. the little kid feels his heart burst with joy.

"we want to," the two of them answer in unison, and within a fraction of a second, megumi finds himself swept up in a warm hug alongside his sister, by you. "thank you for giving me, for giving us a chance," he hears you mutter quietly in a tear-choked voice. the boy simply pats your back the way you do to him. he soon feels another set of arms wrap around the three of you.

megumi thinks he has never felt happier or safer than in this moment.

a while passes with the four of you in this manner, enwrapped in an embrace, before you all finally pull away from each other.

the boy returns to his seat, rubbing his eyes. a minute passes in composing all of yourselves before you state, munching on another fry, "so, step one, including tsumiki and megumi into my legal family is done and successful. thank you, my loves."

tsumiki beams back at you; megumi returns a tiny smile. you grin at them - which, the kid watches, turns slyer as you switch your focus to your boyfriend.

the little boy stares at you, then stifles a snicker - he thinks he has a pretty good idea of what's gonna happen next. his gut instincts are rarely wrong, after all.

"but, 'toru..." you drawl, grin giving way to a smirk as gojo smiles back - perplexed but loving all the same. "for the step two, making you my legal family too, guess i need to wait to say 'yes' until the northern lights viewing two days later... don't i?"

a beat passes, then another, and another.

a loud gasp sounds from tsumiki. megumi turns to his dad - who's gaping wide-eyed at his mom now, the man's face whiter than his ugly hair - and smirks. just like the imp the goggles-wearing idiot always calls him at home, despite you repeatedly telling him not to.

gojo looks back at him, shock written on, engraved into his features.

"though i didn't really help you propose, i'm still the ringbearer, right?"

▸ masterlist

#gojo x you #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru x reader #jjk x you #jjk x reader #jjk drabbles #jjk fics #jjk imagines #gojo drabbles #gojo fics #gojo imagines #jjk fluff #gojo fluff #gojo satoru #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #kit posts 📝

[lovelytsunoda]

tell me something girl (are you happy in this modern world) // tom “iceman” kazansky

summary: after thirty years of marriage, heather kazansky reflects on the time she spent and the love she shared with tom as she prepares to write her eulogy and say goodbye to her husband.

pairing: tom kazansky x wife!oc (named heather)

warnings: canon character death (Tom) and mentions of gooses death from the original movie, depictions of grief, mentions of mental health and medication,

authors note: this is the fic I firmly believe I was put on this earth to write. I wanted to do so much more with it, but honestly would have ended up with like 16k words or something like that.

April 2022, Miramar, California.

“is that the admirals wife?”

“jake, shut the fuck up.”

heather kazasnky had never thought of herself as an impressive woman. she always found herself timid, shy and a little anxious. it wasn’t until the first offshoots of gray started to sprout in her hair, and she’d watched all three of her children grow up that she truly thought sh had done something impressive with her life.

she sat alone at a table in the corner of the hard deck, oblivious to the wandering eyes of her husbands trainees as her slender fingers navigated the keyboard of her MacBook.

“heather?”

she started at the voice, cheeks marred with the flush of someone who had just been sobbing as she turned to look at the speaker.

“peter,” she hummed. “it’s good to see you, maverick.”

heather got to her feet, pulling the other pilot in for a tight hug. “nice to see you too, heather. how are you doing.”

“the best I can. the kids are supposed to be coming up tonight to help with the funerals.”

there were always going to be two funerals. the first was the formal military funeral, where her husband would be buried in the same cemetery as nick bradshaw, and the other was more like a reception, something more human and less structured. for the people who knew him not as admiral kazansky, but as tom.

“I miss him, mav. the house feels strange without him in it. I’ve spent so long being heather kazansky, I don’t know how to go back to being just heather.”

maverick shook his head, taking a seat next to her. “you’re still you, heather. you’re still a mother to three incredible kids, and grandmother to two.”

“with another on the way.” she coughed, somehow managing a smile. “joshua’s new girlfriend is expecting. he told tom before he died.”

“congratulations, heather. how are the kids doing?”

“as well as can be expected. as usual, mitchell is the glue holding us together. cassie’s a wreck. she always was her father’s daughter. and for it to happen so soon after she had jamie just seems cruel. tom was going to retire, did you know that? he was ready to put his papers in, we were going to go to greece. it was finally us time again. he gave so much of himself to this country, and I was so excited to finally have him back.”

pete rested a hand on heathers shoulder, squeezing it through the fur of her cardigan. she was strong despite her age, still well built and sturdy, face marred with laugh lines but not a single telltale old woman wrinkle. “I’m so sorry, heather.”

“thank you.”

she turned back to her laptop, showing the other pilot what she was doing. “I’m gathering pictures for the reception. but most of them are of me. tom always had his fucking camera with him. I should have let the kids do this part. all I’m doing is making myself cry.”

she cast her eyes back to her laptop screen, resisting the urge to reach out and run her finger over the photo, soaking in the good memories as they came flooding back. in the picture, she and tom stood on one side of the kitchen counter, laughing with each other as they cut gingerbread cookies.

it had been their first christmas together.

“oh my god,” maverick laughed. “is that iceman in a cable knit?”

“he was so nervous about meeting my dad for the first time. I had to talk him out of wearing his dress whites.”

December 1985, Richmond, Virginia.

they had been together for six months, give or take the few weeks his team had spent deployed in the gulf, and nothing had intimidated tom kazansky more than meeting his girlfriends father. he had wanted to wear his navy dress whites in an attempt to make a good impression before heather had laughed and made him change into jeans and a sweater before they left the apartment.

even then, he had changed sweaters four times before setting on the white cable knit he was currently wearing.

iceman knew how stressed his girl got during the holidays. her family could bring out the worst in her, and they were both highly strung when they walked in the door.

now, she was off to the side with her sister, cradling a mug of hot coco in her hands as she watched him with a smile, chuckling as he dropped a cup of flour down the front of his jeans.

“you really like him, don’t you?”

heather looked back at her sister, who raised her eyebrows as she took a sip of her hot chocolate.

“I do. I really do, abigail. he makes me feel like I’m worth loving, if that makes sense. everything with tom is just so…easy.”

abigail frowned. “he’s a lieutenant, isn’t he? that means he’s going to be deployed a lot. are you sure you can handle that?”

heather sighed, taking a sip of her drink. “we’re trying. he was out in the gulf for a few weeks in september, and we got through it.”

“he’s barely taken his eyes off you since you got here. and when he looks at you, I don’t see anything other than pure, unfiltered love. I bet he’s got a polaroid of you in his cockpit.”

heather laughed, a warm and giddy feeling in her chest. it was clear how much her family loved iceman, and how quickly they were welcoming him into the fold.

“you know I’m losing him for two months in the new year. he’s off to california, got into some fancy fighter jet training program.”

“you can still go see him, right?”

“yeah, I’ve got a few vacation days saved u- oh fuck.” heather cursed, thrusting her mug into abigail’s arms as she saw what her boyfriend was doing. “give me one second, I’ve gotta stop him from screwing up the gingerbread.”

she pushed up the sleeves of her jacquard sweater, socks skidding across the kitchen tiles as she loosely knotted her hair behind her head.

“kaz, sweetie, give me the rolling pin. you’ve gotta knead the dough.” she smiles softly, putting herself between the pilot and the counter.

one of tom’s flour coated hands came to rest as her waist, his chin on the top of her head as she watched her dip her hands into the bowl of flour, and proceed to knead the gingerbread dough by hand. her lovers hands came to rest over hers, his lips soft and warm against her skin as they kneaded the gingerbread dough together.

“see, you don’t always know everything, lieutenant.” she hummed giddily, running her thumb over his wrist.

“yeah, but I know I love you, and that’s all I need.” Tom laughed, gently using his finger to guide her head towards his and placing a soft kiss on her lips.

April 2022, Miramar, California.

heather paused, wiping a tear from the corner of her eye. "i loved that man so much, pete."

the hard deck was getting busier, off-duty pilots and seamen flooding in from the base at miramar as shifts changed for the day. heather knew all about the dagger squad and the hazy series of events that brought pete mitchell back to the academy, often having to speak for her husband in meetings once his first cancer operation had left him unable to speak for himself.

"auntie heather!" a familiar face looked over from the pool table. bradley bradshaw was a spitting image of his father, right down to the way that his moustache was trimmed.

for heather, it sometimes felt like seeing a ghost.

"brad!" she perked up, waving him over to the table. "how are you?"

when she first came to visit her husband at miramar, somethign about carole bradshaw had pulled heather in. she hadn't known the bradshaw's long, but by the time that goose's accident happened, she felt like she had known that family her whole life.

she did what she could to help carole out afterwards, especially when it came to raising bradley, but as rooster got older and time flew by, it was so easy for carole and heather to fall out of touch.

"you look just like your dad." she hummed, hugging the pilot. "it's like seeing nick again."

bradley nodded solemnly. "i was sorry to hear about admiral kazansky."

"thank you. it had been a long time coming, but there's no way to properly prepare to lose the man you love."

rooster gestures to the group behind him, the mismatched group of people coming to meet him at the table. “aunt heather, I’d like you to meet the dagger squad: jake, natasha, robert, reuben and javy. we knew the admiral well.”

“hi.” heather said weakly, introducing herself. “I’m heather, the admirals wife. or, widow, I guess. I’m still not used to saying that.”

“are you getting ready for the funeral?” jake asked, promptly getting jabbed in the rib cage by natasha.

“what hangman means to say is: we all respected your husband very much, and we would be honoured to help you plan his memorial service.” phoenix corrected, taking heathers hand between both of her own.

“thank you for the offer, natasha.” heather smiled. “bradley, I want to show you something.”

she sat back in front of her laptop, using the touchscreen to pull up a video taken the first summer she came to visit miramar. she had timed the visit to coincide with her birthday, a small selfish part of her unable to fathom spending her birthday without tom.

bradley pulled up a chair next to the table, watching as the screen crackled to life, the date stamp in the corner reading june of 1986. they were inside the o bar, the video opening with heather resting her head on tom’s shoulder, then panning over to the massive birthday cake and sparklers set in front of her. carole bradshaw sat on one side of her, and charlie blackwood was at the head of the table, sitting next to maverick.

“is that my mom?” Bradley smiled fondly. “she looks so full of life.”

“she was.” heather laughed. “and you might remember charlie, she was one of mavericks many lovers.”

“hey!” pete scoffed. “things just didn’t work out.”

“she was always too good for you, pete.” heather laughed, pointing to another space on the screen. the group was singing happy birthday, supported by a rockabilly piano backing track. “bradley, there’s your dad.”

goose was sitting in front of the grand piano, a toothpick hanging between his teeth as he hammered away at the ivory keys, aviator glasses over his eyes.

“happy birthday dear heather, happy birthday to you.”

the camera panned back to heather and tom as she blew out the cake candles. tom pulled her in to a soft kiss while the rest of the table cheered, and then the video cut to black.

“mitchell has been digitizing all of this stuff for us. I caught tom watching our wedding videos before he died.”

“remember when slider and wolfman got absolutely shitfaced at your wedding and tripped down the reception stairs?” maverick laughed to himself “did anybody ever get that on video?”

heather shook her head, a bright smile on her tear stained face as she hunted through the original wedding folder. “I’ve got you one better.”

September 1987, Monterrey, California.

mrs. heather kazansky. she could get used to that.

she was sitting with her sister and tom’s parents, the former two who were conversing with each other in polish. she twirled her wedding band on her finger, face flushed and spirits high as she looked on at her husband.

tom was with maverick and slider, the group of aviators dressed in their best white uniforms, beer bottles lifted high as they drunkenly hollered the words to an old rod stewart song.

“and I know your name is rita, because your perfume smells sweeter.”

abigail was filming, zooming the camera lens in on heather as she asked: “are you sure you don’t wanna back out now? till death do you part, you’re bound to this dumbass now.”

heather laughed, playfully smacking at the camera. “yes, I’m sure!”

“stay with me, come on stay with me!”

sliders voice was three decibels louder than everybody else, and he was also significantly drunker. one of the bridesmaids had her eyes on him, and there wasn’t a doubt in anybody’s mind that ron kerner would have somebody in his bed that night.

iceman’s face was flushed, his arm thrown around maverick as they rocked on their feet, skin sweaty and hair mussed.

but in the midst of all this chaos, he still managed to look over at his new wife, blowing her the softest kiss. she smiled, catching the kiss in her hands and pressing it to her heart, a moment her sister was able to capture frame for frame on digital video.

tom had watched the video hundreds of times as he sat alone in his office, struggling to come to terms with the fact that he’d be leaving not just the love of his life, but his three beautiful children as well.

April 2022. Miramar, California.

“that’s the kind of love that people only dream about.” natasha smiled softly. “you’re lucky you got to spend as much time with him as you did. most couples don’t make it as long as you guys did.”

heather smiled shakily, reaching for her drink. she’d left the sprite so long that the ice had half melted, condensation dripping down the glass.

“he was so good with the kids, you know. I was on and off depressed for a while after joshua was born. my mental health had never been perfect and I was on a low dose anti-anxiety medication for a long time. but after Josh was born, everything just got so much harder and I could barley get out of bed in the mornings. tom would take the kids to school, make their lunches. he was teaching full time at top gun by then, so he took a few days off to stay with me, make me feel like myself again.”

“he was a good man.” robert smiled, rubbing her shoulder.

“yeah, he was.” heather bit her bottom lip, pulling a photo up on her laptop that had the dagger squad letting out a chorus of ‘awe’s’

the picture was taken in 1989. tom was dressed in a gray waffle knit shirt, a pair of pit viper sunglasses on his forehead as he held a smiling baby in his arms. mitchell’s wide eyes looked up at his dad, his tiny fingers wrapped around in of tom’s larger ones.

his name was mitchell ronald kazansky, because tom had made a lame bet with maverick and slider (that he lost) and had to name his firstborn after both of them (because he was a fucking idiot at times, but she loved him anyways).

the boys were both easy children, but cassandra? she was a daddy’s girl through and through, and tom would have moved heaven and earth for his little girl. whatever cassie wanted, she often got, well into adulthood even. she was the spitting image of her father, from her honey blonde hair right down to the birthmark on the underside of her jaw.

when tom walked her down the aisle at her wedding three years ago, he cried all the way to the altar. but not half as much as he sobbed when he held his granddaughter for the first time, cancer-stricken and barely able to speak, but still brimming with joy as he held jamie to his chest.

“he lead a good life. one he was proud of. he used his last words to tell me as much.” heather choked out, overwhelmed by emotions. “I just wish we’d had more time.”

pete placed his hand over hers, squeezing it reassuringly as natasha rubbed her back, and rooster gently squeezed her shoulder.

there was still so much love that heather kazansky still had to give.

still so much love that she was surrounded by.

and maybe that was tom’s way, even from the grave, to tell her that everything would still be alright.

TAGS:

@magnummagnussen @libraryofloveletters @httpiastri @sidcrosbyspuck @twinkodium @sidcrosbyspuck @oconso @thatsdemko @lorarri

#top gun x reader #top gun imagine #tom iceman kazansky x reader #tom kazansky x reader #top gun fanfic #tom kazansky #tom iceman kazansky imagine #top gun (1986) #top gun fanfiction #iceman x reader

[sugarcloudsky]

Ok my request is the ancients or the republics reacting "giant" yn cookie (plottwist they are a witch) with a severely eating disorder and insane

Often asking what is alive or not, what should i eat, WHO i should i eat? What is being alive?

But is mostly bottling its HUNGER and insanity

To the point it gos berserk (when summoned to Battlefield)

And the (cookies in choice) tries to calm down but does fail

Gingerbrave is the one can EASILY calm them (gives them flashbacks when escaping the witch)

For simpling reminding what they fighting for to PROTECT THOSES we cherish against yourself

Yn locked it self below the castle as a crying mess

So the cookie (in choice) comforts them and reasure them

Because gingerbrave is a kid should Deal with should heavy matter

You take the rest bye

Sorry for being long

「Ancient Cookies with a Giant Witch Reader」

characters: the five ancients

wc: 569

cws: mentions of consuming other cookies

small note: i did not completely include the eating disorder portion of this request, i apologize! i did not feel comfortable with writing such a heavy topic, as i do not want to romanticize it or spread misinformation.

hi!!! should hopefully be back into my writing groove now!! going to try to finish my oldest requests first!! ^_^ i also made this in hcs format just so it could be easier for me to write, apologies!

• So hungry…

• You’re so hungry.

• There’s so many cookies around…

• You’re so hungry… You haven’t eaten in so long.

• You’d been suppressing your hunger for so long, not wanting to hurt your friends at all.

• Your friends… the Ancients…

• They were so kind to you… they treated you like an actual cookie. They weren’t scared of you… or your size…

• They treated you so kindly, and it warmed your heart. You didn’t want to hurt them. You couldn’t bring yourself to hurt them.

• The drinks you shared with Hollyberry… the long talks you had with White Lily…

• The time you spent with Golden Cheese… the stories you told with Dark Cacao and Pure Vanilla…

• Those moments were ones that you held dear to your heart.

• You could never hurt these cookies… they never did anything wrong to you. They treated you so well..

• But you were hungry… so hungry… it was becoming more and more unbearable.

• You just wanted to eat… just one bite…

• And you couldn’t take it anymore.

• It wasn’t long until you finally lost control of yourself, destroying everything in your path.

• Cookies all around ran for their lives, in fear of you, the witch.

• The Ancients all did their best to calm you down, to stop you from destroying their beloved homes. To stop you from truly crumbling any cookies.

• Hollyberry and Pure Vanilla pleaded with you, come back to your senses!

• Dark Cacao and Golden Cheese yelled as loudest as they could, you had to listen to them!

• White Lily could only stare at you, with an unreasonable expression on her face. She does her best to use her lillies to help you.

• Although the five of them come out to be unsuccessful in their efforts.

• It’s not until Gingerbrave himself arrives where you begin to finally calm down. He yells to you, pleading with you to come back to your senses.

• Gingerbrave… your friend…

• Destroying the cookies… Gingerbrave reminds you that this isn't what you wanted. You want to protect… not to destroy…

• It didn’t take long for it to all come crashing down, choked sobs escaping your lips before you disappeared completely.

• The five Ancients look at Gingerbrave in shock. How was he able to manage that so quickly? There is so much such a little cookie can do…

• Gingerbrave wants to go find you, to comfort you, but he's stopped by the Ancients. They reassure him that they can find you, and he shouldn't worry about such a thing. They will handle it.

• After a long while of searching, and searching, you’re finally discovered by Pure Vanilla.

• He found you locked up beneath the castle belonging to the witches. He had to sneakily navigate his way throughout to avoid being caught.

• You’d been crying, he noticed. He quickly runs to your side, holding you gently as you sob, feeling guilty about what you’ve done.

• He listens to you. He comforts you. He tells you, everything will be alright.

• One by one, the other ancients begin arriving as well. They all do their best to comfort you. They all give you a big comforting hug, which is enough to lift your spirits, at least a little.

• It was fine… everything was fine…

• They all reassured you that they still love you dearly. If anything ever happened again, they would be there. You’ll never have to go hungry again…

• Everything will be alright.

#cookie run x reader #cookie run kingdom #crk x reader #fanfiction #cookie run x you #crk #x reader #hollyberry x reader #dark cacao x reader #golden cheese x reader #white lily x reader #pure vanilla x reader

[quinloki]

Birthday Request Event

"It's my birthday and I'll write what I want to \o/"

Gift Details ♥ Reader: afab!reader Character: Eustass Kid Kink: #15 Bratty Reader Prompt: #20. "Kiss me like you missed me." Gift Giver: @swampstew

Summary: Eustass up and vanished for a whole day, and gave orders to keep you on the ship no matter what. Then he had the audacity to expect a warm welcome.

Content Notes: oral sex (reader receiving), of course he calls them mouse, vaginal sex, inappropriate use of a devil fruit >.>, cream pie, swearing, short but mighty - fluffy end

This birthday party is 18+, consensual unless explicitly stated otherwise, and BYOB

Kid’s golden amber eyes were on you like a predator watching its prey. His head was between your thighs, and after a few teasing kisses against them, he was now buried in your cunt, eating you like a man starved.

It felt good.

It felt really good.

But you’d be damned if you were going to let him know how good it felt, or how much you missed him.

He’d been gone before you woke up, and came back so late you were truly dead to the world by the time he came to bed. The day had dragged without him around and no one on the ship seemed to know what had kept him. Only that Hip and Hop had explicit orders to keep you aboard. No exceptions.

When you’d woken up, wrapped in his arms, you’d wriggled yourself free with the intent of just being somewhere else when he woke up. Your movements, careful as they were, had been enough to wake him. After you’d refused to kiss him, and he’d refused to tell you what he was up to, you ended up here.

Kid was certain he could fix your bad attitude and had spent the last ten minutes kissing your body and stripping away your pajamas. You didn’t deny him, didn’t tell him to stop, but you refused to kiss him back until he told you what he was up to.

Damn him and his skills.

The first soft moan escapes you, and you can feel the grin on his face with his lips pressed against your pussy like they were. There was no winning for you now, and even if you didn’t want to give in, your body was done trying to protest.

Your legs trembled as he gripped your hips and twirled his pierced tongue against your clit. Your hands grabbed the sheets so roughly your knuckles were white, and a much louder moan was ripped from your throat as he sucked harshly on the bundle of nerves.

You could feel the familiar hum that followed his devil fruit power, and nearly swore as a smooth, round, long, and cold metal object began to rub your slit, just below his lips. It was a gift you had given him some time ago, a perfectly smooth glob of metal that you had happened upon after a particularly fierce battle.

It reminded you of a wish stone, aside from the fact that it wasn’t a stone, but for Eustass Kid it was a perfect one. You told him about wish stones, gave it to him and just left it at that. It had been a few months before either of you had admitted your feelings.

You were delighted to know he kept it on him all that time, but you couldn’t believe what he was getting ready to do with it.

“Is… is that my g-gift?” You didn’t want to talk, you didn’t want to give an inch, but you were too surprised by the revelation.

Eustass only looks at you, spreading your legs wide as he teases your clit with his teeth. Your body freezes, if you buck you could hurt yourself, but the hard, almost sharp sensation of his teeth against your throbbing clit was sending lightning through you.

The brute could be terrifyingly precise when he wanted, and you’re nearly whimpering as the metal wish stone pushes into your cunt. You can’t move, you can’t twitch, all you can do is accept every single drop of pleasure. The stone’s nothing compared to Kid, but it’s vibrating as it slides back and forth inside you while he pays careful attention to your clit.

The pleasure’s building, your toes are flexing, and you’re worried you’re going to leave holes in the sheets as you try not to move.

“Kid – Kid, please. Please. I ca-can’t take it!” You cry as the pleasure seems ready to overwhelm you. You need to move, you can’t stay perfectly still when you cum, you know you can’t, and you want to squirm and scream and cry for him on top of it.

Everything stops, except for a few heavy, lazy licks from Eustass against your shivering clit.

“You miss me, mouse?” He questions evenly, bright eyes regarding you from beneath hooded lids.

You almost cry, nodding. “Yeah.”

“Gonna show me how much you missed me?” He prompts, the wish stone slipping out of you and into Kid’s hand as he changes positions, caging himself over you.

You nod as thick arms hook your legs and push them open, Eustass Kid leaning down closer to you as his heavy cock presses against your clit. You reach out as he leans down closer, letting your hands disappear into his fiery red hair, pulling yourself up to meet him and kissing him.

The press of your lips together included the push of his throbbing cock into your pussy. Your fingers gripped his hair tightly as you gasped from the pleasure, Kid leaning into you and diving into the kiss as he thrusts deep inside you. He took you, devouring your cries and moans with relentless and aggressive kisses as his hips slapped into your thighs.

He was so precise. So exacting. Even at his most bruising, Kid took you to the limit he intended. Limits you weren’t even originally certain you could reach. Not just behind closed doors either.

“K-Kid!” You cry, your voice muffled by the continued kisses. His lipstick is a mess on his face, it’s a mess on yours, you’re sure. How late did he get back, that he didn’t even clean it off?

“Yeah, sweetheart?” The question falls from him in a grunt as he continues to pound into you.

“F-fuck, fill me up, please!” You beg, feeling yourself melt at the glint in his eyes as the devious grin slips along his face.

“Missed you too, mouse.” He grins before leaning down and kissing you again. His tongue pushing past your lips as he commands control of both of your mouths.

Your body tenses, shivering against the immovable will that his Eustass-goddamned-Kid as the pleasure within you crests. Your cry of pleasure breaks the kiss as you’re squirming uselessly under him. His lips find your neck instead, teeth and tongue leaving their mark and urging more desperate growls of pleasure from you as you orgasm against him.

A few heavy thrusts, a satisfied grunt that sinks into your neck, you can feel his pleasure already leaking down your body. He slumps against you, head resting against your chest, as you both just enjoy the quiet afterglow for a moment.

You wonder idly if he got any sleep at all last night, and what could he possibly have been up to? What the hell happened yesterday that would leave Kid docile and spent after a single round?

It would be some hours before you would know. The velvet wrapped custom wooden box was still perfectly wrapped in Kid’s coat. From the box to its contents, he had made everything, in a single day, at someone else’s workshop, because he didn’t want you to see anything.

Not until he was ready.

Check out the event - requests are accepted until 7/31/2023 EST

#birthday request event #one piece drabble #eustass kid #eustass x reader #x reader #reader insert #Raven my sweet sweet dear friend thank you thank you so much for this prompt. #Happy birthday to you dear friend ♥ #I hope this is a good gift =D #writing gods forgive me I love writing Eustass Kid fics.

[luffyslove]

Hello! I saw your post and was wondering if you could do a Death the Kid X autistic! Reader? If not that’s totally fine and hope college is going well for you :)

Hi Anon!

I was pretty scared to start writing this since I'm not on the spectrum and I didn't want it to be offensive in any way. I did my best to research and reached out to some of my friends to help!

I didn't know if you wanted this to be a fic or headcanons so I did both!

Pairing: Death the Kid x GN!Reader

(Please keep in mind all characters are aged up, none of them are minors)

Warnings⚠️: Kid is kinda rude in the beginning but it turns into fluff I promise

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How you meet

You walked into Lord deaths office, being the newest transfer student of the academy. Lord death invited you to take a seat right in front of him.

"Ah, Y/N, correct? I am very happy to have you at our academy. I'm sure you'll fit in just fine!" He hands you your new schedule. All you do is stare at the paper. It's like it's not even real. You feel yourself drift away, like you're in the clouds, floating. You can hear Lord death talking to you, but you don't process it. Not at all. Who knows how long you stayed like that, drtifting away. It's not until the first bell rings, and he tells you to make your way to class that you realize you didn't catch anything he said. Not wanting to seem rude, you smiled and left. That was some time ago. Now you were in the middle of some hallway, wondering where you took the wrong turn.

You looked at your schedule and back at the school map, schedule, school map, schedule-

Where was I again?

That's right, class, you were trying to make your way to class. Just then you felt yourself become overwhelmed. You didn't know where you were, what to do, or who to ask for help. As you walk by, trying to take in your unfamiliar surroundings, you reach into your pocket and start playing with a bobby pin.

Maybe I'll calm down more with this. Maybe I can find my classroom before the next class starts!

You begin to giggle at yourself, wondering how you got here in the first place.

THUD!

Not looking ahead, you ran into what seemed like a wall, until you see papers flying everywhere and a man in front of you.

"What the hell is wrong with you?! Can't look where you're going?!" He shouts. This causes you to shut down. No longer are you giggling and smiling trying to make your way to class. You're on the floor staring at this man, not daring to say a word. He had black hair with white stripes, golden eyes, and, a suit? Weird. He goes on and on about how he organized the papers for hours on end, ready to place them around the school at their respective corners, each one at the same height. As he continues to ramble, your eyes look around, you need something to ground yourself in this situation.

My bobby pin! Where's, where's my bobby pin?

You start searching for your precious bobby pin on all fours. While trying to find it you feel tears well up in your eyes. You try to blink them away but it's no use, and one falls. Coincidentally, it falls on one of those paper flyers the other guy had. And he saw.

No longer is he shouting at you for what you did, no longer is he glaring at you, instead he stares softly at you.

"Are you looking for something?" He asks. You look at him, a lump in your throat preventing you from speaking.

"I'm sorry I got carried away, I just, I spent a long time organizing these flyers for the school, my father asked me to. I'm Death, Death the Kid." He extends his hand out for you to shake, but you just loom at him. You want to move, but you can't, you want to talk to him, apologize, maybe even scream back, but you can't. You want to, but at this moment it's like the whole world is suffocating you.

He gets up and reaches his hand out "Come on, I'll help you up" Your hand trembles as you take his, he pulls you up. He picks up your schedule, "Y/N huh? So you're new, now I feel like more of an asshole" He laughs. "Come on, I'll take you to the bathrooms then I'll walk you to class" As you both make your ways to the bathroom and Kid stays outside, you look in the mirror at yourself. Your hair disheveled from the impact, mascara running, puffy red eyes from the tears. You do your best to make yourself look presentable and walk outside the bathrooms.

Kid looks up, "Feeling better? I can walk to class if you would like, I don't have anything better to do." He smiles. You feel it, you can feel yourself trying to talk to him, to tell him something. "The flyers..." You meant for the sentence to come out bold, but instead it came out barely above a whisper. "Hm? Is something wrong?" He asks. If it were earlier you would've been talking his ear off, info dumping like there's no tomorrow. "I'm sorry about, about, the flyers" You spoke up a little louder, fidgeting with your hands. "Oh, I can always print out new ones" He smiles. "Right now, we need to get you to class" He grabs your hand and leads you down the hallway you both came from. Your eyes scan everywhere, but bobby pins are pretty hard to find when there's papers scattered everywhere they shouldn't be. You let out a sigh, "If you're looking for something, I can help you find it" He suggests "I need to clean all this up anyway. Can you, tell me what you're looking for?" He asks. "B,bobby pin" is all you could manage to say. But before you know it Kid is on the floor grabbing the flyers and stacking them neatly, all in their respective piles while looking for your bobby pin.

"Got it" He yells, causing you to cover your ears. "Sorry, did I scare you? I guess you don't like when people are too loud..here" He places the bobby pin in your hand. You smile, wishing you could thank him, but a smile will do. "Come on, let's get you to class before, oh, there's only 10 minutes left." Your small adventure had taken too long and now you missed your first class at the academy, before you began to spiral Kid gripped your hand tighter, "It's okay, we can spend them together." He smiles. There was something about him that made you think you two were similar, and that you two would grow very close in the future. "Alright, what now, Kid?"

When you date

A complete sweetheart

Adjusts his rooms lighting to your liking

Buys you things to fidget with

Let's you talk his ear off about whatever you're obsessed with at the moment

Doesn't make loud sounds with you, tries to tell others to be quiet

Introduces you to his friends

You go to black star when you're feeling understimulated, he always gets you going

You guys have study dates

Never works out, Kid can't write his name, you can't focus on the paper

Hand holding!!

If you're in a crowd and it's too loud, Kid knows when you need time. Rubs his thumbs in circles on the back of your hand

If it's too much he will take you outside and you two will talk, your head leaning on his shoulder while he whispers sweet nothings in your ear

Will always kiss you on the forehead

Talks for you at restaurants or with new people

He just wants to make sure you feel safe and heard!!

A/N: I hope this wasn't bad! It's my first time writing in awhile so please let me know what you think!

Xi

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#x reader #i havent written in so long #im tired #i want candy #death the kid x reader

[blood-choke]

Hi, I have a question about mc

So, I’m still in the beginning part of chapter two (mostly because I keep pausing to read other variations of my options I choose instead of just playing the game uninterrupted lol); and I was just wondering about some things.

I’ve gone through most asks on her about V and the way she treats mc when mc doesn’t go her way and I sort of understand her aggressiveness though it’s still triggering as I’ve not really seen the good parts, cuz my mc doesn’t trust her and finds her secretive nature suspicious; but I wonder like, was mc a bad person before entombment?

Like obvi everyone isn’t black and white and has grey areas in personality, but in the beginning Val just seems so triggered (?) that mc is alive again and here again with her. She only seems chill when you pick options that align with what she wants, but outside that, she seems truly disturbed like she needs to take a breather or sth.

This also came to mind cuz of how Hana talks about us TO us. Like saying how she expected us to not be like Val and her seeming disappointed that we were similar to Val, in that scene were we discover phones for the first time. Like, is that just cuz of the choice that prompted her jealousy, or is that because of how mc was a person before?

I hope I constructed those questions well lol, but it just makes me wonder if certain ways they react towards the mc are just cuz of how they are a people or cuz of how mc was as a person. Cuz it seems like she and Val had a pretty turbulent relationship; was that due to their personalities or the times they were in? I feel like that’ll be answered as the story goes on, but yeah; I do wonder if mc’s previous personality majorly influences how H and V act towards us.

this is not solely directed at you anon but i have gotten a lot of asks that essentially boil down to "who is the Correct one in this situation" and i've been kinda vague or ignoring the messages because it goes against the whole point of the story, but i've received enough questions like this i'm just going to do a blanket response to explain what my intention is with writing this and why there will be no straight answers to most of these questions.

i'll put it under a cut because it's going to be long (and i guess if you want to avoid potential spoilers). i'm not going to get into details, mainly just the overarching themes that i'm trying to communicate through the narrative and with characters like the mc and Valentina.

first, to start, let me talk about Valentina:

Valentina is written in a very intentional way. she is meant to be erratic and hypocritical and not very nice. she is hundreds of years old, and at this point nearly the entire last century of her life was spent in a controlling, abusive relationship. she is going to be both defensive and aggressive because she's still in a lot of pain and struggling to work through it. she has trust issues, she thinks everyone is using her for her money, she is very paranoid and sensitive. she, as the kids say, needs therapy. this does not absolve her of her poor treatment of Hana and the mc currently, but i hope this explains it better. she is meant to be a polarizing and challenging character.

i've said a few times now that you are never going to know who is telling the truth about Standard, you're never going to get a moment in game where it tells you exactly who is Right or Wrong. i've written Valentina the way i have because yes, you are supposed to doubt her, but also i'm a bit astounded by how many people seem to just have no sympathy for her at all (again not directed at you anon but just in general.) while you're never going to know if it was her idea or not, if she chose Standard or not, or even really know what happened between her and Julien, the indisputable facts are that she, as a lesbian, had to marry a man out of desperation and was forced to be his wife and daughter for nearly 90 years. she is not going to be well adjusted after this. she is not going to want to talk about this. she has valid reasons for being reluctant to share the horrible things that happened to her, as well as being a little suspicious.

she is a tragic character. she is the antithesis of the "perfect victim." we will get to have a bit of a "confrontation" with her at the start of the next chapter, and i'm hopeful that this will get across exactly why Valentina is the way she is in the text.

as for her relationship with mc, it has always been a bit intense, but they did love each other genuinely before. it's why mc did what they did to end up entombed in the first place. i would blame a lot of the problems of their relationship previously on the time period they were in. it wasn't easy for either of them. like i said before, being a vampire was not a get out of jail free card. it's been hinted at but mc and Valentina were living in poor conditions until the 1910s, where they finally started getting a foothold, by trapping and killing men and with mc themself dressing up as a man. but then what happened, happened, and mc was entombed in the 1920s.

was mc a bad person? i mean they very much did murder people along with Valentina. it's up to you how you feel about that. she murders people now in the demo. she's a vampire, she doesn't really have the same ethics as we do. was she bad to Valentina? sometimes. Valentina was bad to her, too. were they "toxic"? maybe. mc doesn't remember, and honestly Valentina doesn't remember that much either.

the mc waking up with no memory, while a convenient plot device in an IF game like this, was also done intentionally. you're never going to know if the mc was really a "bad person" though playing through you can probably feel that the mc does suspect that they were - is it true, or is this an insecurity around their butchness, a fear of her own masculinity? we don't know. part of the narrative is the mc reconciling this fact, as well as understanding that either way they can choose to be better - she's been given a second chance. she does not have to be a certain way because of who she is - the parallels being drawn between her and Standard are there to acknowledge this negative view of butches as just "men lite" as well as this bioessentialist idea that masculinity = bad. but just because the mc is butch does not mean she will end up like Standard or Atlas or Julien. and those three aren't bad just because they're men, they're bad because they choose to be bad and abuse their power over marginalized people. this is something that will be expanded upon as the story progresses and mc gets more comfortable in their identity and we see more of the council, particularly Sasha and Cassius.

and now with Hana, she's never met the mc before, so she kind of has this preconceived idea of her, and you do get that comment both because she's a bit jealous but also because she's afraid of the mc's jealousy. if you're at the start of ch2 you may have not had the conversation with Hana yet, but her irritation comes from the fear that you will get jealous of her and want to shove her out, despite her close relationship with Valentina, and this being her home, too. she assumes you're asking because you're trying to "sus her out" and decide whether you're going to align as friends or enemies. she says you're like Valentina in that regard because, like we touched on, Valentina is very paranoid and jealous.

to be clear i do understand the game is early on, we're only on ch3, so i don't expect readers to be able to magically intuit exactly what i'm writing (some of the stuff about mc is impossible to know at this stage). but i cannot stress enough that everyone in this story can be considered "bad" in some way, and you're not going to get a eureka moment where everything is clarified. it's meant to be messy and confusing. i'm never going to outright say "this character is the One True Villain, and this character is the Righteous one." hopefully this does clear a few things up, though, and better helps you (and everyone else that has been asking) understand what's going on, and what the deal is with both the mc and Valentina.

#again sorry anon this is not like personally directed at you im just using ur ask as an example #i hope ur enjoying exploring all the variations :-) #and i do hope this helps you understand; we will get 'softer' scenes with Valentina eventually #mc #valentina #ask #anonymous

[ghostxrose]

Worship Me Like I Worship You | Bakugo Katsuki & Reader

Summary ~ You love Katsuki. You worship him like the God he is. You would do anything for him. So what is this switch that flipped in your mind when you finally have him?

Tags/Warnings ~ Fem!Psycho!Reader, yandere themes, characters are in their 20's, stalking, roofying, dubcon/noncon but sex doesnt happen, Idk what else to tag.. psycho-shit, I guess lol

Note ~ Hey y'all.. I really have no explanation for this one.. I wanted to try my hand at writing twisted/psycho stuff and this is what I churned out. Now, it is based off of a couple of songs (All Around Me by Flyleaf and God Complex by Violent Vira) so just like Nicotine, I'm sorry if it's cringe. Welp, buckle in Lovelies because Reader really said "Marbles? What marbles??"

The day you got hired on as a secretary for Dynamight’s hero agency was the single greatest day of your life. You had been following the progress of Dynamight’s career since he started to get famous back in high school. Ever since you were thirteen years old and had first seen him on your TV during the UA Sports Festival his first year, you had known that he was the one.

Every video, news article, and picture uploaded online of Dynamight, aka Katsuki Bakugo, was automatically saved to your phone or computer so that you could look at him anytime you wanted. His loud and brash personality, explosive Quirk, and frequent encounters with villains made sure to keep him within the media’s sights and it really felt like he was all around you.

“Every time I see his face.. it’s like he’s thickening the air I’m breathing but in the best way possible. Like I’m burning and not used to seeing him, not used to seeing a God. Something about him makes me feel like I’m alive.” You dazedly tried explaining to a friend one day when they had noticed your obsession taking off not long after Katsuki’s hero debut.

Of course, your friend had no idea what you were going on about and had looked at you with such concern and.. fear. You couldn’t understand how your friend didn’t see the white light that shone behind Katsuki, illuminating the sacred being so brightly that you cry sometimes. How, in your dreams, Katuski takes your outstretched hand and promises to never leave you as you shout your beliefs in him, tell him that you worship him, and make sure he knows that he owns your heart and soul.

Now, years later, you no longer speak to that friend or any of your old friends. You don’t speak to anybody, really, but you don’t care. All you need is Katsuki and now, working at his agency, you’re going to have him.

Your Quirk, when it manifested, was registered as a weak and non-threatening anesthetic gaseous-type Quirk. When activated, your Quirk came out of your mouth upon an exhale as a colorless and odorless gas that you could control the potency of if you were to train it. The only tell that your Quirk had when it was activated was your body feeling physically colder to the touch. And, luckily enough for you, you are immune to the effects of your anesthetics with the exception of hypothermia from overuse.

Weak and non-threatening; that’s what your Quirk had been.. when you were a little kid. But you’ve trained with it in secret over the years, your test subjects being any animals you could get close enough to and unsuspecting people. You have worked hard to master the levels of potency depending on the subject, the proximity you would need to be to a subject, and keeping yourself warm so as to keep from developing hypothermia when pushing the limits of your Quirk.

You spent years putting together your plan and perfecting every single detail. The final piece of your puzzled plan falling into place when you discreetly snagged the Quirk canceling cuffs from an overly flirtatious officer that was chatting you up one day at the agency. You had blown a puff of weakly potented gas their way and the fucker had spent the next 20 minutes in a dazed high too busy poorly flirting with you to realize that you had made any move to touch them at all.

Currently, it’s a little after ten at night and Katsuki has just walked into the agency to finish up his shift then change out of his hero costume. You’re sitting in your car that’s parked not far from his in the lot and getting into character. You have about twenty five to thirty minutes until Katsuki walks out of the building and to his car, the perfect amount of time.

Your forehead is resting against the top of your steering wheel, your hands clutching the sides tightly with white knuckles, and loud sobs leave your mouth. A knocking on your window startles you and your head jerks up to see who it could possibly be at this late hour. There is a watery and truly pitiful look on your face when your eyes connect with sharp crimson ones.

You reach a shaky hand out to the door handle and open it slowly so Katsuki has time to move back to allow you to open the door fully. Your car’s interior lights don’t kick on, in fact none of your car’s lights come on, when you open the door and you let out a pathetic whimper.

“What are you still doing here?” Katsuki asks, his gruff tone holding slight irritation and discomfort.

Mentally you melt over the sound of that rough voice speaking words to you. You let the sound play on loop in your mind as you answer him in the most ‘helpless-damsel-in-distress’ voice you can manage.

“I-I’m s-so s-sorry, Dynamight, S-Sir.. M-my car w-won’t s-start.. I-I’m not s-sure wh-what’s wrong with i-it..” You stutter out between sobs.

“You didn’t think to call a friend to come get ya? Or maybe a tow truck?” Katsuki questions exasperatedly and you let out a couple more sobs.

“I-I h-haven’t m-made any fr-friends, y-yet.. I-I’m s-still new a-around h-here.. Pl-plus m-my ph-phone i-is d-dead..” You cry and stutter out then put your face into your hands.

Katsuki lets out a heavy and annoyed sigh, “Okay, okay, just calm down. Fuck, alright, let me take a look. I know some shit about cars.”

Your head snaps up and you look at him with max amounts of pathetic relief, “R-really?! Th-thank y-you so much, Dynamight!”

Katsuki rolls his eyes, “Yeah, yeah, and just call me Bakugo. I’m not in my damn hero gear right now. And pop the hood.”

“S-sorry, Bakugo..” You quietly apologize, then attempt to look for the lever to pop the hood. Out of the corner of your eye, you see the emotions of Katsuki’s short fuse flicker across his face before he schools his features and takes a deep breath.

“Move. I’ll do it.” He says curtly and you move out of the way for him.

“Thank you so much, Katsuki.” You say, your voice sultry and free of the shaky patheticness it’s held the whole time.

“The fuck did you just s-” He tries to angrily question but you’ve already blown a cloud of gas his direction and the effects are almost immediate. His face changes to surprise as his body gives out and falls back into your driver’s seat, then within seconds his eyes close and his breaths deepen.

You act quickly, pulling the Quirk canceling cuffs from behind your back and securing them around his wrists. You hum a happy tune to yourself as you move his unconscious body to the back seat with minimal struggle. Luckily, you have been hardcore working out in preparation for this part of the plan. You just knew that like any other God out there, Katsuki was built and densely packed full of muscle.

Once you have him situated in the backseat, you pop open the hood, reconnect your battery, then slide into the driver’s seat and start the car. ‘I know some shit about cars too, my lovely Katsuki!’ You think with a giggle as you leave the parking lot.

You drive for a few hours, occasionally blowing mentally measured doses of anesthetic gas into the backseat to keep Katsuki asleep. Finally, you drive carefully down a dirt road that leads to an old family farmhouse that you have fond memories of. The better of those memories being the most recent ones where you came out here to prepare the house so that it may be fitting of a God such as Katsuki. Though as you half drag, half carry his unconscious body into said house, something in you begins to feel.. ungratified.

You bring Katsuki to the guest room on the first story of the house and get him onto the bed. As an extra precaution, you blow a bit more gas into his face before going back out to the car to get your bags. Quickly getting back into the house and locking the front door behind you, you bring all of your stuff to the guest room and get to work.

In hindsight, it may have been a bit excessive buying chains to keep Katsuki in place.. but what if the cuffs failed at some point, huh? If you used rope then he would be able to blast right through them. At least chains would give him more of a challenge, and if there is anything that you know for sure about Katsuki, it’s that he loves a challenge.

So you get to work chaining each of his ankles to the bed posts at the foot of the bed. Then you disconnect the chain between the wrist cuffs and attach chains to each of his wrists that connect to the headboard. You stand back to look over your work, to take in his peaceful sleeping features, and realize that maybe you should have changed him before chaining him up.. Oh well, too late now, hopefully his jeans are comfy. All that’s left to do is wait for Katsuki to wake up.

It takes a total of three and a half hours for Katuski to finally stir and begin to wake from his forced slumber. Grumbles of slurred curses fall from his mouth and his eyes flutter open as he brings a hand up to his head. You watch this whole waking process from a chair in the corner of the room, some thoughts that have accumulated over the last few hours weighing heavy in your mind.

“Where the fuck am I? The fuck’s going on?” Katsuki angrily asks, the slur of his words starting to wear off.

“You are in the presence of your biggest worshiper, Katsuki.” You answer calmly, your legs crossed and hands clasped in your lap.

“Jesus fucking christ! I’m gonna kill you, you psychotic bitch!!” Katsuki shouts and aims a hand at you in an attempt to send a blast your way while he also tries to launch himself off the bed.

When neither action is successful he stares down at himself in horror while you just let out a semi-tired sigh. He looks back up to you as horror, shock, rage, and whatever else may be bubbling under his skin fights over who gets to contort his face.

“Maybe I was your biggest worshiper.. I’ve been having some interesting thoughts and feelings since we got here.” You ponder out loud as you pick at the threads of your pants.

“You’re fucking crazy!! What the fuck have you done to my Quirk?! Do you know how fucking screwed you’re about to be when people find out you’ve.. Find out about what you’ve done?! Ever heard of fucking Tar-”

“Enough, Katsuki.” You say sharply while holding a hand up. “Isn’t this what you wanted? Why you became a hero? So you could be praised? Loved? Worshiped like the God you are? I mean, your full hero name is Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight.” You say, a now dark and twisting devotion gleaming in your eyes and a small smile on your lips.

“You have always been a God to me, Katsuki. Someone I have always found worthy of my love and devotion and worship. But finally having you here with me, something has changed..” You look down from Katsuki to stare intensely at a spot on the floor.

“You mean you finally lost your last fucking marble?!” Katsuki snarls out as he looks at the chains on his limbs.

“You can’t lose something you never truly had, my lovely Katsuki.. No no, it’s these feelings inside of me. They’re not so much conflicting as they are two sides of the same coin..” You try to explain but Katsuki is having none of it.

“You’re not making a lick of fucking sense to me, psycho bitch! Now, let me the fuck out!!” He shouts but you wave him off which aids in pissing him off more.

“My old feelings.. I’ve spent all of these years screaming to you that I wanna be your true love, the only one for you.. That I could be just who you need.. But now.. These new feelings.. I want to be the God now.” You say, your voice distant as pieces inside of you click.

You stand from your chair and Katsuki’s body tenses as he glares harshly at you and snarls. You step towards him with the body language and face of a mother who is trying to sweetly calm their child. Right as Katsuki brings his hands up, making to punch at you, you blow an invisible cloud of low dose anesthetic gas towards him.

You watch as his body relaxes and his glare softens to something more neutral-dopey. You send him just a little bit more, just to ensure your own safety, and wait for it to take effect before you climb onto the bed. You straddle his lap, your arms looping over his shoulders, and look into his clouded and dazed crimson eyes.

“Won’t you just plead for me now, Katsuki?”

“Y-yess..”

“You make me your God, Katsuki, and I’ll tear down the sky for you.”

“Y-Youu w-willl?”

“Mhmm, I’ll do it all for you for life, my love. We are meant to be, Katsuki Bakugo.”

“W-wee a-re m-eant t-to be..”

“Darling, please worship me..” You breathe against his neck, then start to kiss along it slowly.

The bottom of his jaw is as far as your lips get before something is suddenly coiling around your body and yanking you away from Katsuki. You shove down the urge to scream in favor of pulling in air so that you can exhale a large cloud of anesthetic gas but something wraps around your nose and mouth before you get the chance.

Your eyes dart to the doorway and connect with the glowing green eyes of Pro Hero Deku. Tears involuntarily begin to pour from your eyes and you’re not sure if it’s the fear, heartbreak, or lack of oxygen that’s getting to you. Your cries are muffled as Deku brings you closer to himself via the tendrils of his Blackwhip. He turns your body away from him while he slaps Quirk canceling cuffs on your wrists but you can feel his livid and burning gaze melting through your skull the whole time.

“Z-Zuku? Y-you’re here?” Katsuki questions dazedly from the bed.

It’s then that you see the ring on Katsuki’s left ring finger. It’s glowing a slowly pulsing red color and you scream at yourself for not checking him for tracking devices.

“Yes, Kacchan, I’m here. It’s okay now, Kacchan, you’re safe.” Deku says as he moves over to the bed to free Katsuki, all while Blackwhip squeezes tightly around you.

“Th-thanks, Zuku. Love you.” Katsuki murmurs to Deku but you could still hear him.

“I love you too, Kacchan, let’s go home.” Deku says as he breaks the final chain and picks up Katsuki.

“If there is any God that Kacchan worships it’s me, you psychotic bitch.” Deku darkly informs you as Blackwhip squeezes you even tighter and he drags you out of the house.

Note ~ Sooo.. did you like the little sprinkle of BKDK at the end there? Cute, right? *insert nervous laughter* Anywho, I hope that this fic does better here than it did on my AO3, Nicotine certainly has, so I have some hope. Stay tuned, My Lovelies, I think I'll start posting my newest fic soon! Oh and.. Happy Valentines Day, Lovelies, much loves to you all! <3

#bakugo brain rot #bakugo katuski #bnha bakugou #mha bakugo katsuki #mha bakugou #bnha #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki x you #bakugou katsuki x y/n #bakugou katsuki x midoriya izuku #bkdk #mha bkdk #bnha bkdk #midoriya izuku #deku #pro hero bakugou #pro hero deku #reader insert #x reader

[phoenix-rising-starbird-one]

Can u write something phoenix x hangman?

Hello Anon. I can and I did. I wasn't sure if this was for Trick-Or-Treat but this turned into a Halloween-ish one-shot. A little angstier than I wanted but also fluffy and soft Jake. Also, I'm a huge fan of Toy Story, hence the costumes and title.

Every Hour We Spent Together, Lives Within My Heart

Pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x Natasha "Phoenix" Trace, friendship (for now, might expand later on) Wordcount: 1,300ish Warnings: Mentions of illness, cancer, sick kids (I'm sorry), mentions of death, mentions of grieving, mentions of loss This will be cross-posted to my AO3! Also, I usually make my own mood boards, but if anyone wishes to make one for this, I'd love you forever.

“Come on, Phoenix. Please? Pretty please?” Natasha raises a ‘what the fuck’ brow. Hangman never asks nicely. Or beg for that matter! But here he stands, batting his lashes with his best impression of puppy dog eyes, and Natasha can’t help but snort. “Why don’t you ask Bob or Rooster?” She starts walking, trying to leave Jake in the dust, but he’s quick to fall into step with her.

“Bob’s on leave. And Rooster already signed up. So did Fanboy, Coyote, and Mav, by the way.” Natasha stops in her tracks and Jake nearly topples the both of them when he crashes into her body. “So why do you need my help?” Nat crosses her arms, raises a brow. “Because the more the better. Come on. It’s for a good cause.” Nat rolls her eyes and groans. “If I say no, you gonna guilt trip me until next year, aren’t you?” Jake grins in triumph even though Natasha hasn’t agreed yet. “God, you’re so obnoxious.” She shakes her head. “But… okay.” “Alright! Knew I could count on ya.” Jake waggles his brows, completely unbothered by the fact that Natasha flips him off when she leaves. “And no worries about the costume. I have everything ready for us. Just make sure to wear long jeans.” He calls out, laughs at Natasha’s very obvious and very grumpy “yeah, yeah”. And it’s not like Natasha is against this thing. In fact, she loves the idea. But the fact that it’s Hangman who reels her into this cause kind of makes her want to scream. Out of all people, why him? But what is done is done and two days later, she’s there, Jake already holding a bag out to her, along with a red hat with a white-corded brim. “Really?” “Yes, really.” Jake grins, already dressed in his costume, space boots and all. “Why do you get to be Buzz?” Nat quirks a brow and Jake laughs. “Because Jessie’s hat is too small for my head and red’s not my color.” Nat’s eyes might just get stuck from rolling them so often, but really, Jake isn’t making it easy with that all-knowing grin that matches his ego. “I’m not wearing the cow print chaps.” “The costume won’t be complete if you don’t.” Jake pouts and Nat rolls her eyes, again. “Remember, it’s for a good cause.” Jake reminds. He knows he’s won when Nat just grabs everything with a huffed breath. Again, Natasha loves the idea. But Jake? As in Lieutenant Jake ‘career is my actual middle name’ “Hangman” Seresin? Nat can’t help but wonder what’s in it for him. If he has ulterior motives. Or if it’s just a ploy to pick up women. But she is here now, changing in the locker room made available for the volunteers. And damn it! It is for a good cause! So she even braids her hair before she sets the red hat atop her head.

Nat takes a look in the mirror, shakes her head, mutters a “what the fuck” under her breath before her lips tick upwards. She’s gotta admit this: the costume is cute. And it evokes a type of nostalgia she thought long forgotten: childhood memories of owning a doll of the very character she’s dressed up as now, memories of yelling “yee-haw” and running around the living room with the doll on her shoulders. “Ready?” Jake smiles when Nat finally emerges from the women’s locker room and Nat does a double take. Usually, Jake’s face will split with his signature ear-to-ear grin, but right now, there’s something softer, something kinder, and Nat still doesn’t quite trust it all. “Why are you doing this?” She asks when they make their way inside the elevator. Jake pushes the button for the fifth floor and shrugs. “Can’t be an asshole all the time, right?” There’s something solemn in his voice but before Nat has a chance to ask more questions, the doors open, and then it’s all a bit of a blur. “More volunteers .” A nurse rushes towards Nat and shakes her hand. “Thank you so much for being here today. You have no idea what this means to the kids on this station since most can’t go trick-or-treating with their peers and all. I love your costume, by the way. Come. Come. Let me show you around. Please make sure to sanitize your hands before entering each room. Gosh… Jake, I mean you know the drill. He’ll show you which rooms require extra steps before entering them. Again, thank you so much. Your friends are already making their rounds…” Nat kind of feels like she’s been hit by a hurricane with how fast the nurse talks and walks, but she’s kind of thankful for the distraction, cause what does the nurse mean by ‘Jake knows the drill?’ “This is Jamie’s room. Jake, you know Jamie.” The little group stops in front of room 503, the blue door with a big glass panel closed for now. “How’s she doing?” Jake’s features have dropped to a seriousness Nat’s never seen on him before. Not even on deployments. “She’s doing well today. Much better than last time.” The nurse nods encouragingly. “I’ll let you guys get to it. I have to check on a few patients. If you need help at any point…” “Just push the button. I know the drill.” Jake reminds and the nurse smiles before she moves on to her next patient. Jake’s hand is already on the handle when he asks “Ready to meet Jamie?” His mouth ticks upward with a caring and somehow simultaneously mischievous smile, and Nat nods before he opens the door. “Well hello there, little lady. How you doin’ today?” “JAKE!”

And that’s how it goes all afternoon. Jake enters each room with a cheery “well hello there” and the kids scream his name. And for each child, Jake seems to have some sort of routine. With some, he reads. With others, he helps color in their favorite coloring books or plays their favorite board game. He listens to their stories. He tells them how brave they all are, how they’re heroes in his eyes. And with the littlest patients, Jake sings a lullaby or two. And Nat swears she feels her throat tighten a few times over, trying to swallow that damn lump inside and force back a tear or two. Who is this man and what has he done with Lieutenant Jake ‘career is my actual middle name’ Hangman Seresin? After, the lot of volunteers round out their day at the Hard Deck with drinks and a few games of pool and darts; and a song here and there, laughter in between. Penny’s gone all out with decorations this year, especially with the Jack-O-lanterns. Jack-o-lanterns line the path to the entrance. Jack-o-lanterns line the paths around. Jack-o-lanterns line the patio facing the ocean. And that’s where Nat finds Jake. Sitting on a chair, he’s nursing a beer, staring off into the distance. She startles the usually observant pilot, coaxing a chuckle from him when she sits down in a chair next to him, the red hat still on her head, a little more askew now. Jake knows Nat’s watching his face like she’s trying to find some kind of new truth, so he beats her to the chase and answers her question before she can ask by pulling his wallet from his jeans and handing Nat a small photograph. The edges are torn. Colors a tad bit faded from age. But depicted there, centered on two by three inches of photopaper, is a fairly young Jake, and in his arms another boy -maybe three years or so younger- with similar eyes and similar smile, but no hair, head as bare as a few of the children they’d visited today. “My little brother,” Jake confirms, his face graced with the softest and simultaneously saddest smile he’s ever shown. “He loved Toy Story.” And Jake doesn’t have to say much else. Nat understands now, understands the why.

So she lets Jake sit, lets him gaze out into the distance. It’s when Rooster pops his head out the back door to say “last round” that Nat moves from her seat, ready to head inside. And it’s then that Jake stops her gently with a hand on her wrist. “Thank you.” He whispers. “For tagging along. Made their day. And… mine.” Nat nods, sweeps a gentle hand across Jake’s forehead, places a soft kiss there after. “Next year, I’ll pick the costumes.” She smiles and Jake gently kisses the inside of her wrist. “Deal.” He whispers before he lets go. And just when Nat crosses the threshold inside the bar, she leans back, smirks. “I hope you like pink.”

#jake seresin #jake hangman seresin #natasha trace #natasha phoenix trace #glen powell #monica barbaro #writing #mine #my writing

[pippin-katz]

Post Red, White, & Royal Blue Viewing Thoughts

Okay, I have now watched this film from start to finish four times since it dropped, and I think I'm ready to share my thoughts. This is a lot of thoughts, so if you click "keep reading", be prepared to read.

Total Word Count: 6,579

Part One: First Impressions

After the first watch, I didn't really know how to feel. I finished it not feeling very satisfied.

After the second watch, it clicked.

I adore it. It is a beautiful movie full of hope and love and it is definitely one of my favorite movies now.

I realized that I had watched it wrong. I was enjoying myself watching the film, but my mind was far too focused on thinking about what would and wouldn't be in the movie to truly watch it for the movie it is. This movie is not the book. It's not trying to be. It is a separate entity with its own unique take on the story. It is an adaptation, not a recitation, as Matthew Lopez put it.

If you watch it focusing on the book and wanting it to be a perfect copy, you will be disappointed. However, that's part of the point. It is not trying to recite the book.

Part Two: Film VS Book Format

In order for a perfect, 100% accurate recitation of the book to film to even be possible, a series would have to be made. Red, White, & Royal Blue is not a very long book, but it is truly stuffed to the brim with content. Casey did not have to worry about a budget or time constraints when they wrote it. That meant they could write lots of scenes with the side characters, and whole side plots without a problem.

That is simply not possible to do in a single movie. That is not what the format of a film is made for.

That's why sequels and series exists. That's why the television format exists. Multiple plot lines can be explored at once and you have more time in total, however the trade off is the audience dynamic changes and the risk that brings.

A series needs to have a strong concept in order to for it to successfully hold its audience and keep it watching through to the conclusion of the plots. It's bit different now due to streaming, but with series, if your audience does not remain interested and active, you may not get to even finish telling your story. All that time spent on the side plots and great scenes is wasted because you never even got to follow through with the main plot, let alone those.

A movie is made and then it's done. They can't unmake it. That story is always going to be told from start to finish in that movie, however it tells it.

With the way the industry works nowadays, getting anything more unique than the expected blockbuster movies to be made is difficult. The corporate side of the film industry has practically made it impossible to make anything that doesn't already belong to a franchise. I have not seen a trailer for a romance centered film in what feels like years.

This is a romcom, which have already been struggling, but also a QUEER romcom. It's incredible that the movie was made at all when you think about Hollywood and its absurd views.

We've already seen that Red, White, & Royal Blue got an R rating in the US despite not really showing anything actually explicit. Matthew Lopez even voiced that he believes if it had been a straight couple, it would've been PG-13. I believe it 100% would've been PG-13 if it was a straight couple.

To anyone who might be wondering why the rating matters, the maturity rating of a movie can heavily impact its audience and marketing. Obviously, an R rating steers away any preteens and parents with kids, but it also puts a preconceived notion of the movie's contents into the heads of anyone who sees the trailer.

When you see that R, you expect either heavily graphic sexual content, extreme violence, or vulgar language, sometimes all three depending on the movie. There are lots of adults who are fine with the idea of a bit of sexual content in their media, like a scene that implies it but cuts away or shows the bare minimum of the actions for the viewer to get the idea. But I think a lot people draw the line at something graphic enough to get an R rating, like Fifty Shades of Grey for example. They're going to the theater to watch a romance film, not a pornography film.

Red, White, & Royal Blue already has to fight for its audience by being a queer romance, and getting an R rating adds an extra hurdle that impacts what kind of audience will even consider their movie.

All that being said, it would've been unbelievably difficult for Matthew and the rest of the production team to secure a series rather than a movie.

Part Three: Adapting Your Point of View

In the case of this adaptation, it is not meant to be the book. After I realized this, rewatching the movie as the movie fixed my reaction.

It recontextualized the movie for me. I stopped sitting there like, "oh he didn't say this line" or "damn they cut that scene" for the entire thing. I approached it as a separate entity, so they didn't "change" the story, so to speak; I completely pushed the book aside and focused on the movie.

Lots of things are different in the movie world, but instead of focusing on them being different from the book, approaching it is as the standard of the movie allowed me to appreciate it. Some examples:

So Henry's last name is different; not to them! To them that's always been his name!

So June got removed; not to them! To them Alex was always an only child!

So Luna got removed; not to them! They don't know who that is because he never existed in their world!

The book still exists the way it has always existed. It is not changing, and not going anywhere. It's world will always be there within those pages. The movie exists someplace else, in its own world. What makes it an adaptation rather than an original story is the common denominator of the main characters and their relationship. Everything else is secondary.

Part Four: Cuts

To expand on that last statement, everything other than Alex and Henry's relationship is secondary. Their story, their scenes, their dynamic comes first before anything else. They are more important than June, than Nora, than Pez, than Luna, than anyone else. Their dynamic is more important than the campaign, the divorce, than the sexuality crisis, than Nora, Pez, and June's polycule, than the Powder Princess, than anything else.

Alex and Henry's relationship is the most important thing.

It's not a story focused on Alex learning his bisexual identity. That's a side plot.

It's not a story focused on Nora and Pez (and June in the book) hooking up. That's a side plot.

It's not a story focused on Beatrice's past with cocaine. That's a side plot.

It's not a story focused on Luna's role in exposing Richards. That's a side plot.

People need to understand what a side plot's role in a story is. It pulls away from the main story to discuss something different, but relevant. They're good for development, filler, or connecting dots between major events, but without them, the primary plot should be able to stand alone.

Red, White, & Royal Blue's plot stands alone. The plot of the first son of the president of the United States falling in love with a prince from Britain is an independent storyline.

With Alex and Henry, they're rivals-to-friends-to-lovers, so there is so much to say and show with so little time. It's not like two best friends realizing they're in love; their bond has been on screen the entire time already, it just changes into something more. It's not like a meet-cute where they go on one date and fall madly in love in minutes. Alex and Henry have to dislike each other, then build an understanding that they can like each other, then further that understanding into loving each other.

That takes time! Think about how many pages of emails are in the book! Those are there to show the reader the progress being made between them, and there's a lot of them, probably canonically more than the ones we get to read. A movie can't spend half its runtime narrating emails, it does not have time for that.

Believe me, someone adapting a piece of media that they love, as much as Matthew has said he loves the book, does not take pleasure in removing things. You find interviews he has done where he's talked about it, and admitted to having to be very ruthless when it came to cutting things. We know that the original cut was three hours long! He did not set out to hurt your feelings by removing and changing things.

Part Five: Miguel & The Waterloo Letters

Aside from the obvious removals, I think the biggest change in the movie is presence of Miguel. I've seen a lot of people already unsure or hateful of his character, though he did not bother me that much because I see what he's there for.

Miguel is a combination of Liam's character and Luna's/Richards' plot line.

Liam is obviously in the book as part of Alex's realization that he's not straight. He's the "I've played around with the idea" character. They have that phone call about their past "relationship" and he's done. Other than that, he's a cameo role that shows up like two times.

Miguel flirts with Alex and he gets a bit embarrassed/flustered because we learn that they had a make-out session while naked in a hot tub. Alex does not flirt back with Miguel; if anything, he ignores the insinuations that he's clearly making. He actively refuses to acknowledge their hook up when talking to him. He's not looking for a relationship with him, despite being aware that Miguel definitely wants to hook up with him. This is a symptom and storytelling method of giving off the impression that he's not really sure about his sexuality. He's not in complete denial, but clearly not super confident in himself to even acknowledge Miguel's attempts at flirting with him. It can be swept under the rug or brushed off. He only acknowledges Miguel's attempts to hook up again after he's slept with Henry, after he's become more comfortable and confident in his bisexuality.

Miguel is also a substitute for the Richards plot line, specifically the exposing Alex part. He's not the same as Luna by any means, but he was someone Alex was friendly with that turned around and stabbed him in the back, which is what he believes Luna to have done for most of the book. Miguel is clearly the one who got ahold of the emails and leaked them, filling in for the role Richards' campaign has. He's the one who has his team stalk Alex to expose him. Again, Miguel is not Richards by any means. He does not actively stalk Alex, but he fills in the role of the person behind the leak for nefarious reasons. Richards wants to expose him to win the election. Miguel wants to expose him for his journalism and because he feels personally slighted by him. It's not the same, but it works. They're both self-serving reasons for why the emails got leaked.

Part Six: Keeping It Light

I've definitely seen some people upset that the leak wasn't played as big of a deal as it was in the book. I think this change is tied to the role of Miguel filling in for Richards, and I believe it's intentionally not as intense as the book.

They have made it clear that the movie's goal is lift people's spirits, to give them hope and courage for the future, to make them feel seen, and bring joy.

The side plot of Ellen's competitor legitimately stalking her son and setting him up is fucking horrible to say in the least. That part of the book is the heaviest of the despair and public humiliation that hits them.

While it's important to the plot that the emails get leaked, I think Matthew made a point of skipping around it a little because it would've brought the entire tone of the movie down to a truly depressing state. It's heartbreaking to read, and probably would've been absolutely devastating to watch, and while there's angst, Alex and Henry's story is meant to be a happy one, an inspiring one. They would not have had the time to properly engage with that level of angst and then get out of it without the viewer getting whiplash.

I think that's probably also why the conversation with the king was far shorter than the conversation with the queen in the book. With the goal being to make people happy, spending too long on the seriously negative parts of the narrative would have been problematic and counterproductive. Like I said in part two of this essay, Casey had all the time in the world to set that up and drop that bomb on the reader, and then all the time in the world to get Alex and Henry to climb out of the hole they'd fallen into.

The movie doesn't remove all the angst and heartbreak, but it does its best not to pull the viewer out of the fantasy. When something on screen hits too close to reality, when it's not supposed to, it can ruin the movie experience.

I just watched Indiana Jones: The Last Crusade the other day, and legitimately had myself yanked painfully back into reality with the Nazi scenes, specifically the book burning one. That movie takes place in the past, the idea being that things aren't like that anymore, but with the way things have been going in America, and specifically in the state of Florida, where I live, it was too much. It used to be ridiculous to watch historical fiction where Nazi's hung swastikas everywhere and burned books, but now I see pictures of modern day swastikas being worn and flown and it crushed me. I couldn't enjoy the rest of the movie, despite it obviously being a piece of action/historical fiction about the Holy Grail, not actually about WWII.

I think it's also why they removed the Luna and Richards plotline, because an older Republican politician using their position to take advantage of young girls and boys is very, very dark. It's too close to what we hear coming out of the news every day.

I can also see this being the reason they decided to keep Ellen and Oscar together in this version. The book has the time to go into how their divorce both negatively and positively effected their family dynamic.

I saw someone complaining that Oscar talking about his and Ellen's relationship being a risk didn't work because they were still together, and the conversation in the book is to make Alex realize that it's worth it even if it doesn't work.

Yes, that's the point in the book. That is not the goal in the movie.

Again, they wanted this to be a fantasy romance that uplifted everyone. Approaching that decision with the more pessimistic idea that they probably wouldn't work paints a different mood than the hope his parents being together gives Alex for him and Henry. These are two entirely different approaches! It's intentional!

If Red, White, & Royal Blue had done more with those parts of the book, it very likely would have pulled the viewer out of the immersion and remind them of the depressing realities of real life, which is not the goal.

Part Seven: Intimacy

I was absolutely blown away by the intimate scenes in this movie. I'm demisexual, on the the ace-spectrum, and I am not personally a fan of sexual content in film. This is mostly because it's usually poorly executed, unnecessary, or over-the-top. It pops up in places it doesn't need to be, and makes me roll my eyes or get pissed off.

Part of this frustration undoubtedly comes from my bias as part of the queer community, and I'm willing to admit that. I've developed a slight bitterness towards most portrayals of straight couples in media from it being shoved down my throat my entire life.

It was new for me to see intimate scenes with a queer couple, or rather a gay couple specifically. I have encountered lesbian sex scenes, like in Wynonna Earp. However, I had never seen two men together. I think the reason for this difference is fairly obvious, as it's been widely known for some time that lesbians are very often fetishized by straight men, who are unfortunately the majority of higherups in Hollywood. It is far more likely to have a straight executive sign off on a lesbian sex scene than a gay one, because to them, women together is "fun", while men together is considered "uncomfortable".

This is not to say that gay men aren't fetishized, because they unfortunately are too, but only to point out the disproportionate amount of lesbian intimacy vs gay intimacy in film.

The point being that I had never seen two men be intimate with each other on screen. I was nervous going in because of my issues with most sex scenes, but there was something magical about how they handled them in this movie.

Like I said, I hate when sex scenes are tossed in for no reason, but in the case of Alex and Henry, it is a core part of their relationship and its development. It was the first time I watched a sex scene start without going "here we go with the sex" with a sigh. Their sexual dynamic is part of their dynamic as a whole, that is a key element in becoming closer and understanding each other more.

The thing is, I say all that knowing that there is still a lot of "gays being horny" moments in the book, some of which making it into the movie. What was wonderfully done about that though was that the fast and aggressive encounters were limited. They didn't show any further than making out and the motion of taking off pants. All of those horny moments were handled perfectly to provide the right amount of comedy and yes, sexiness, without shoving it down our throat (pun not intended).

I personally don't need to see a guy giving another guy a blowjob in a romantic comedy film! Ace-spectrum or not, if I wanted to see that, I'd go to a porn website like everyone else. Romance and pornography are not the same thing! Having them go far enough for the viewer to know what they were doing without showing it was perfect.

That brings me to the sex scene. Yes, the work of art that is their first time in Paris.

I said before that a lot of sex scenes make me annoyed or roll my eyes, because most of them are just thrown in for the sake of playing to their audience. In this case, this scene was not for the audience.

I've seen several people say this, and I have to agree, that watching that scene feels like you're intruding on something very personal and it is the truest example of intimacy I've ever seen. It's the most graphic scene in the film, yet it does not show the graphic parts, if that makes sense. Yes, they're naked, and you know what they're doing, but they don't film them in a way that made me uncomfortable, aside from feeling a bit bashful because, I mean, have you watched the scene?

There's no showing of their genitals or private areas at all. It's almost entirely focused on their faces, and the few cuts to their bodies only include Henry's hand on Alex's back and shoulder, in his hair, and the two of them holding hands. This is because they're not just "having sex", but as Henry put it "making love". Yes, that's a bit of an old fashioned way to put it, but it makes far more sense than simply saying it's a sex scene.

It's not just "two characters have sex whoo!". They're not crazily fucking like porn stars. They're clearly going slow and cherishing each other. It's almost impossible to put into words how intimate the scene feels and how not like a sex scene it feels despite being one. There's only some soft instrumental as the background as well, not some pornographic moaning and whatnot that you might find in other movies or shows.

This is all coming from a demisexual who has no interest in sex and gets genuinely annoyed with how often it comes up in film. That is how different this scene was. Their intimacy coordinator, Robbie Taylor Hunt, deserves a huge bonus.

Part Eight: Taylor & Nicholas

I mentioned this in a post before the movie came out, but I'll gladly say it again now that I've seen it. I've never seen a couple on film convince me so entirely that they were two real people in love, and not just fictional characters. It's astonishing to me, and I cannot put the feeling into words. I've seen couples in real life that look less in love than they do.

Both of them deserve awards for their performances in this film. Their chemistry on screen together is indescribable. They are amazing in every way. Both of them nailed their characterizations and nailed their dynamic together.

I had never seen either of them before this, and I can say that I desperately hope they are given the opportunity to be in another project together after this. I've been reading the interviews that were conducted prior to the strike and my respect for the two of them is immeasurable. They are both incredible actors and they did not take the responsibility of the representation lightly, and you can tell. You can tell through how electrifying the two of them are in every scene they share and in their individual moments of standing up for themselves.

Alex's speech about the queer community was beautifully written, but Taylor's execution is what drove it home. The energy he put into Alex on a whole truly brought him to life. Nicholas is one of the most expressive actors I've ever seen. His facial expressions spoke so much with no words in the way Henry has to because he's not allowed to share his thoughts.

I have so much respect and admiration for them, and I hope that even though they can't say much at the moment, they can at least see the impact they've had after just the first day of it being available.

Part Nine: Queer Identity

"The conformity of the closet cannot be answered with the forced conformity in coming out of it." - Alex Claremont-Diaz

I have never heard such a beautiful sentence regarding coming out. It could not be more perfect, especially considering how people immediately started assuming that Taylor and Nicholas are straight men playing queer roles.

As far as I know of, neither of them have publicly discussed their identities, and they do not have to. That does not give anyone the right to assume they're straight. If they are, I see that only as another testament of their skill and talent as actors. If they aren't, then they aren't and maybe they used their own personal experiences as part of their performances. Either way, they don't have to tell us. They have a right not to.

Nicholas obviously did a fucking phenomenal job with Henry and was amazing in portraying how that lifestyle can effect someone like him. He was truly heartbreaking to watch in his sad scenes.

The multiple lines where Alex discusses being bisexual are fantastic. The B is not silent! Having his bisexuality continuously reenforced to the audience was a great call, and they did it without being obvious about it. It's not like he's saying it every five minutes, but he doesn't just say "I like both" and never mention it again. He specifically uses the label bisexual when speaking to Henry and telling his mom. It's important for people to hear that word and be unable to ignore it.

Even though Alex had less of a crisis about being bisexual than in the book, there was still an arc to his confidence in his label. You can feel the uncertainty early on through Taylor's performance. Alex pretends to be suave and confident, but as soon as he goes to tell Henry his label, it takes him a second to say it. Then in Paris before their first time, he admits he's never had sex with another man before, and is clearly nervous. Taylor nailed those moments where Alex's confidence cracks. And you can see Alex become more comfortable with the label as the movie continues. When his mother asks, he's laughing and simply says "I'm bi" without any preamble, unlike when he needed a minute to breathe before saying it to Henry.

Speaking of his mother, although they didn't have the time to do the PowerPoint presentation, they still made sure to have Ellen not just be accepting, but supportive too. She doesn't just say "okay, that's cool", but takes it seriously as a part of her son's life. As embarrassing as it is to have your mom talk sex with you, it shows how she was immediately prepared to help him feel safe and healthy while being in a relationship with a man. She did not tiptoe around it or shy away from it. That is not just acceptance, that is support. That is important.

This movie is important in so many ways. It is honestly still hard to believe it exists.

Part Ten: Pacing

The film moves fast, but this is because the book also moves fast, but the film has way less time to get the same point across. I may be in the minority, but after I disconnected the book from the movie, I didn't feel like it was rushed.

Here's the thing, a lot of movies have a nasty habit of being stuffed with filler. There's so much unnecessary stuff that's put into films to pad the runtime, make it longer. Most people don't really think about it, but it's actually super common, and annoying for those who notice.

Red, White, & Royal Blue does not move too fast. It simply does not waste time.

The minimum runtime to be considered a feature length film in the US is 60+ minutes, but a lot of movies nowadays try to get closer to 120+ minutes, which is a big difference. Consider the original Avengers film, 143 minutes, which is a lot, and then we got Avengers: Endgame which was 183 minutes.

For some perspective, The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers released to theaters with a 179 minute-long runtime, but the extended edition runtime is 235 minutes. The Lord of the Rings films are notorious for their extended versions and the fact that they are extraordinarily long. Almost everyone who watches the extended edition trilogy spreads it out over several days, if not a week because it is too much to watch in one sitting unless you have the entire day free.

These massive numbers come from the fact that they have a lot to show, most of which is vital to the plot. Too many movies now add unnecessary content to make their runtime longer.

There is not a single scene in Red, White, & Royal Blue is meaningless. Even the fun montage scenes like those at the lake house are there to communicate the development of their relationship, and how far they've come.

While we can see their love showing up early on, obviously they lead with friends-with-benefits relationship that makes for most of their physically shared time being sex centered. The lake house shows them genuinely enjoying being around each other outside of that context, like reading together on a hammock or Henry doing drunk karaoke. Their small conversations are picked carefully to showcase their banter, then their growing connection.

The story is about them, and therefore, there's no point in taking a winding sidetrack to go into the details of Alex's college classes or the campaign progress. That's all great for the book, but in the movie, they don't need to do that, and the decision not to was the right one. It only would've taken the focus off of them.

They have a lot to do with just them. There's no reason to drag their feet around, so they don't! There's no point in spending fifteen-twenty minutes to show something they can accomplish in five. There's no point in dragging out the passage of time.

The fast pace only doesn't work if their progression as a couple isn't believable, and we've already established that their progress as a couple is perfectly balanced.

That's my take on the pacing, that it's not rushed. I prefer them just going, not wasting any time. That's the other part that makes the cuts not bother me.

As much as I love so many scenes that didn't make it, they didn't need to be there for the story to progress as it needed to. Trying to cram more in would've only made it hard to keep up with. That would've made it rushed. The way it is is fine.

Part Eleven: Texts VS Emails

I saw some complaints that they didn't continue the way they did the text messages with the way they did the emails, and I have to say, I disagree that they should've.

The texts are conversational and work really well to have pop up graphics and edits, but those emails are letters. They are a lot more serious, and using purely voiceover is far less distracting. You can focus purely on what they're saying and the inflection of their voices. It also gave them a chance to show the progress of time through Alex's campaign work.

Most of their emails are exchanged over a period of time where nothing particularly interesting is happening. They are the interesting thing. Alex is busy with college and Henry's just doing his royal duties. That doesn't make for the most entertaining action on screen.

Alex's devotion to Texas in the book is his binder. It works really well in the book because we can hear Alex's thoughts, considering there's not much actually said about the binder. He has that confrontation with that guy in the White House, but the binder is his private, secret project. Hearing his thoughts and feelings directly works better than how it would've played out if they did the same thing in the movie. It would've been some shots of him with it, foreshadowing and hinting at it, but its true importance would've been lost on those who haven't read the book.

Instead, they were direct about it. He tries to get his strategy implemented from the beginning, while in the book, it's a secret plan that he doesn't intend to share yet. Instead of the argument with that coworker, he has the argument with his mother, which hits the beats of his desires for Texas. He wants to go out there and make them feel heard and reach out to the younger population, and that's exactly what he tells his mother in that argument.

Having him working on the campaign during that stretch of time between Paris and the lake house accomplished what all those thoughts and emails and Luna's role did in establishing what politics means to Alex, what Texas means to Alex.

Being able to watch him working while hearing him and Henry write to each other through the emails was a perfect blending of two parts of the book.

And again, their phrasing in the emails is very different from the texts. The pop-ups would've felt a bit odd. In the texts where they do that, they're bantering back and forth, sending the articles, and sharing interests, but in those emails, Alex is talking about the pressure he's under to succeed and Henry is talking about how inspiring he is. It's better to keep the audience focused in on them rather than the fun graphics and whatnot.

Part Twelve: Alex's Speech

I've been seeing some people upset about the changes to Alex's speech, and I have to say that I feel like they're overreacting. What he said in the movie was so, so important, and for the people who are freaking out like "he wouldn't confirm their relationship without talking to Henry first", do you not realize that people can have an unspoken understanding?

We don't get the same conversations, but Henry is obviously scared about going public, but he never gives off the impression that he doesn't want to, or that he wants to lie about it. There's also the undeniable fact that they had conversations we did not get to see, book based or not.

You think they didn't say anything else to each other the rest of the night after the V&A visit? You think we got all the emails they shared over the year they were seeing each other?

This is one of those moments where I'm like, "get over yourself" to those people. Who do you think knows Henry better? You, or the actual character he's in a relationship with?

Part Thirteen: Important Messages

Another thing I've been seeing driving me up the wall is people complaining about some of the messages from the book not being in the movie, and again, I have to say, do you not understand what an adaptation is?

The message of this movie is the primary message of the book. That love should not have to be justified to others.

That's essentially what Henry says to the king near the end. He directly questions him about maintaining a traditional royal image, and puts the king in the position of having to admit his discriminatory views. The king had been skirting around it, saying things like "your love is genuine" and whatnot, but still forcing them to lie and hide, which Henry puts his foot down to. He doesn't let him get away with dancing around it.

Henry's line of being who he is and not who they want him to be is powerful and potent. He refuses to keep justifying who he is. Philip refers to their love as a mad infatuation, and Henry shuts him down. He and Alex are in love with each other, and he is not going to pretend otherwise even though he's scared.

That is the core message, that love is love, and love wins.

The other messages are still in the book. They haven't gone anywhere. They simply did not fit into the movie format, but that does not mean they're not going to be heard. The opening credits tells you right off the bat that this is based on a novel, and those who enjoy the movie are likely to go read it afterwards if they hadn't previously.

Trying to cram too many themes and messages into one movie can destroy the impact of all of them. Sometimes it's better to focus on nailing one major theme and making sure that it hits powerfully than bouncing all over the place in an attempt say as much as possible. Messages that are alluded to or mentioned, but never followed through on harm the movie more than their inclusion helps it. It makes them feel hollow, like they're just there to be like "see? we're talking about this important stuff, give us credit".

I feel like people deep down know that, that if they had tried to fit everything they would've disliked it for a whole different reason, but they're still so determined to be cynical and negative that they can't acknowledge what the film did say.

Part Fourteen: Final Thoughts & Cake

Congratulations if you've read this far! I did not expect this essay to be as long as it was, but everything I wanted to say needed more explanation, which led to more branch offs, and that's why I ended up sectioning it.

I can safely say that I absolutely adore this movie. I am going to be watching it on loop for the next couple days since I have the house to myself for the weekend.

This movie is definitely its own entity. It is unique from the book, and should not be judged by how "accurate" it is. It's a different telling of the story, and a fantastic one. It deserves to be appreciated, and gushed about.

If anyone tries to bring you down with their negativity towards this film, ignore them. I don't mean people who are politely providing valid criticism. I mean those people who have been basing their opinions entirely on how the movie compares to the book, and deciding that any changes made automatically makes it inferior. The people who are ignoring all of the fantastic aspects of the movie because they're so wrapped up in their own head.

I'm finishing this off with that reminder, that the movie is not trying to be the book. Please keep that in your mind when you watch it. For those who may have felt a similar feeling of unsatisfaction after watching it for the first time, rewatching with this as your focus may allow you to find what you were missing from the experience before.

To put it into a simple metaphor, Red, White, & Royal Blue is a cake. Yes, I'm aware of the irony, but it works very well here.

Let's say that the base story of Red, White, & Royal Blue is a chocolate cake.

The book can be a chocolate cake, with buttercream between the layers, pink icing, and sprinkles. The movie can be a chocolate cake with chocolate mousse between the layers, blue icing, and flowers.

They are both chocolate cakes. They are the same and different at the same time. Most people are going to have a preference, but that does not mean you can't enjoy both.

You have two chocolate cakes! It's a win-win!

And to the people who are simply trashing this movie, I'd like to stop and ask you something. How is it that the original author, and creator of these characters and story, approves and loves this adaptation, but you can't?

I'm an author myself, and I'm fiercely protective over my characters and ideas, and immediately get my claws out when someone suggests a major change I disagree with or a false interpretation of it.

Casey themselves has said basically the same thing I did at the start of this when I explained that the movie exists separately to the book, and they love it. If the original creator loves it, sorry, but I really don't give a damn what you have to say about its "accuracy".

To everyone else, remember to try and not let people's negativity influence you too much. If you love the movie, you don't need to justify it. You're allowed to.

Thank you for reading this. Seriously, fucking congrats if you made it this far. I'm expecting this to get like no notes and still spent an entire day writing this lmfao

#red white and royal blue #rwrb #rwrb movie #rwrb book #rwrb thoughts #rwrb spoilers #alex claremont diaz #taylor zakhar perez #henry fox mountchristen windsor #henry hanover stuart fox #nicholas galitzine #matthew lopez #firstprince #history huh #bet we could make some

[justzawe]

ZAWE ASHTON

Through writing, actor Zawe Ashton is slowly shifting her role from object to subject.

Words by Hettie O’Brien. Photography by Pelle Crépin. Styling by Holly White. Hair by Bjorn Krischker. Makeup by James O’Riley.

FILMS ISSUE 45

The work of a convincing performer is to make a practice of disjunction, blurring fact and fiction until it’s no longer clear where the performance ends. Zawe Ashton, an actor and writer from East London, has been performing for so long that she sometimes feels as though she has “just woken up.” “There has been this eye, this gaze, that has followed me since birth,” she says. This is what it is to have grown up as a child actor, an experience that would be strange, were Ashton to have ever known anything different.

It’s only now, at the age of 37, that Ashton feels she has managed to “reshuffle the cards,” as she puts it. We’re speaking over Zoom: Ashton from the northwest London home she shares with her fiancé, the actor Tom Hiddleston, and me from an office room that I describe, when she asks, as a “Zoom booth.” “Are they the new thing? They sound sexy,” Ashton says with characteristic provocation. “They sound like the new location for a fresh scandal to me. It happened in a Zoom booth!”

There is a sense that runs through Ashton’s work of someone chafing at the limits of their discipline. She is best known in the US for her role in Velvet Buzzsaw, a satirical horror film set in the Los Angeles art world in which she starred alongside Jake Gyllenhaal. She grew up in Hackney, East London (her parents were both schoolteachers; her mother is Ugandan, her father English) and attended Anna Scher, a theater school in Islington that banned the words “star” and “fame” from the classroom: Stars burn out, Scher taught them, but the career of an actor persists regardless of fame.

Ashton’s first notable role was in the British kids’ TV show The Demon Headmaster. In her early 20s, she took bit parts in crime dramas and hospital soaps; her break came when she was cast, at 27, as the chaotic, drug-taking, straight-talking student Vod in the series Fresh Meat. One article from the time suggested Ashton was “the coolest thing on TV right now.” But Ashton felt herself growing increasingly frustrated. “I hit a wall in my life—whether it was burnout, or [an] existential crisis, where I was like, Hold on a minute . . . . I’ve spent the past 30-something years performing, and I have no idea who for.”

What Ashton really wanted to do, she tells me, was to be a writer. In the basement, her mother still keeps a box of the stories Ashton wrote as a child, including one, from when she was six, about a dinosaur having breakfast with Elizabeth Taylor. “I think language, and how surreal and expressive language is, has always been part of my wanting to be in this world.” So, alongside her acting jobs, Ashton wrote a play. For All the Women Who Thought They Were Mad centered on the experiences of Black women in the corporate workplace and was praised for its darkly comic study of prejudice when it was staged at the Hackney Showroom in 2019.1 She also wrote a pilot for a TV drama about a woman having an early midlife crisis. “I was treated extremely badly at the hands of television executives,” she says. The pilot was passed over, and Ashton “put it in a drawer because it was just too traumatic.”

A book agent read that defunct script, and asked if Ashton would consider authoring something longer. “It’s one of the hardest, best things I’ve done,” she says of the resulting book, Character Breakdown, a playful, tragicomic account of an unnamed protagonist’s acting career. “So much of my life has been scripted; so much commitment has been to saying other people’s words and inhabiting other women,” she explains. “I thought . . . I can sit down and write this without anyone giving me permission.” Writing was an opportunity to stop acting—for a while. Ashton spent some time living in Margate, a blustery seaside town popular with people priced out of London. She nicknamed the book, which took two years to finish, “the cockroach in the nuclear disaster of my life.” For a while, it felt like the only continuity she could grasp at.

Character Breakdown defies the very definition of the word order—it is composed of fragmentary conversations retold in a weaving chronology. The protagonist receives different character synopses that are irritatingly sexist (a silent woman in a civil rights protest, a sexy spy, a dead body on a mortuary slab). She takes calls from her agent, sips lukewarm wine, changes her hair to appease casting directors and remembers being bullied at school after first appearing on TV. It is loosely fictionalized: Ashton says that if the book seems like an “actor’s memoir,” she has “done something very wrong.” “It was an attempt, or an opportunity, to try and crack open the difference between fact and fiction before slamming them wholeheartedly back together again,” she explains.

Although magnified in the acting industry, the banal occurrences of casual misogyny and racism that Ashton’s protagonist endures resonate far beyond the book. “Thinking about acting became like a blueprint for a way that I could look at my experience as a woman in the world,” she says. She missed her publisher’s first deadline, a misstep that turned into a gift. By the time Ashton submitted the manuscript, revelations of sexual violence in the film industry had started to break. “Me Too really reframed my writing completely, because I thought, No one is going to want to hear from an actress about stuff that’s gone down and how it might relate to the wider world. And suddenly it was all anyone wanted to hear.”

We’re speaking a month before the release of Mr. Malcolm’s List, a sugar-frosted Regency rom-com in which Ashton plays a lead role. The film revolves around the wayward schemes of Ashton’s character, Miss Julia Thistlewaite, and will please anyone who enjoyed Bridgerton.2 In period-drama obsessed Britain, it would have been unthinkable for a mixed-heritage British woman to land this role even five years ago. The multiracial elite portrayed in Mr. Malcolm’s List is a fantasy that omits the reality of colonial racism in Regency Britain, casting actors of color as dukes and duchesses. “There is a lucrative market . . . . for the depiction of racial difference in the absence of racial inequality,” the British author and journalist Gary Younge recently wrote of Bridgerton, taking issue with the genre. Ashton is critical of this argument. “What’s crazy is there’s only a handful of [similar] shows,” she says. “When you get real diversity is when there are so many . . . . that some can show one aspect [of history], some can show another aspect, and this is a spectrum.”

The protagonist of Character Breakdown reflects that “nothing good comes of being visible.” Together with this film, and her forthcoming role as a Marvel villain, Ashton seems poised to become the kind of highly visible celebrity who occupies a different plane of existence: rich, distant and chauffeured.3 Yet that’s not how she comes across in person. She is open and disarming, throwing back bigger questions to those I ask. I wonder if she enjoys the control of writing in her own words, as opposed to speaking those of others. “It doesn’t even feel like control,” she says. Ashton tells me about the American visual artist Lorraine O’Grady (about whom she made a film for the Tate). “She wanted to play with the idea of being subject and object,” Ashton says. “You want to shift the lens, shift the perspective on your work and life as much as you can. And that’s how I feel.”

#zawe ashton #kinfolk magazine #interview #article

[tuttocenere]

I guess this is a weird question to phrase but what languages do you know? Know isn’t really the right word, but like what languages do you have any experience in, maybe

(Asking because I saw something about knowing lots of languages in some tags and got curious)

I will tell the story of me and the foreign languages I have known. Putting a cut because it's a bit long.

So when I was a little kid, maybe three or four, my mom got me my first English book. It was a picture book with cute orange cats showing various words like jobs, numbers and so on.

As a European I was naturally also exposed to a lot of other languages, Italian, Ukrainian, Turkish and such, in the street, on vacation, on the radio, in church. But I didn't actively try to learn any of them.

When I was maybe eight I found some old university books on Russian that my mom had. Alas that language remains my white whale. I can't really say anything beyond "I like music" and "Larisa is the best traktorist in Odessa" (the book was old). Reading anything takes very long. My accent is atrocious.

From age ten or so, in school, I learned English (easy), Latin (meh) and French (argh) one after the other. I was and am pretty good at all of them although I'm only really fluent in English.

Then as a teenager I liked Mangas and so I started to learn Japanese. I really liked the Chinese characters they use, so I decided to learn Chinese as well. In university I put a massive amount of effort into that, spent a year in China and all that, and I'm pretty good at it now although it's rusty because I rarely speak it. But I can read fluently.

I'm also kind of OK at understanding Japanese but not to the point where I could just read a book or anything.

Throughout school and uni I took a lot of one semester electives on various languages like Esperanto, Arabic, Turkish, Cantonese and so on. None of them really stuck, but at least I have a basic idea of how they work and know a word or two.

Through knowing Latin and French, and through listening to a lot of opera, and through spending some time traveling in Italy, I can understand Italian. I can only say the most basic things actively and I can't really even write down things I hear because I'm unsure about spelling and grammar, but I can read anything.

Through knowing Latin, French, and Italian, I can basically understand Spanish and especially Catalan. I have started actively trying to learn it this year for reasons I have stated elsewhere.

I tried to pull a similar gambit on the Slavic languages by learning Polish, but while that is actually a very interesting language that is kind of halfway between German and Russian, I mildly gave up on it a while ago because I didn't have enough time.

I've also dipped a toe in some duolingo courses on various languages like Gaelic, Danish, and so on, but I don't remember anything.

It's all a bit ironic because I'm not very outgoing, so usually I'm too shy to speak at all, never mind in a foreign language. But I can read poems and stuff and that's really what I wanted.

#about me #languages tag #ask me things

[morningmarionette]

THIUGHTS ON THE GUILD GO! I loved them sm they were my fav faction and all the characters make me deeply insane I am WAITING for them to come back they have to asagiri set up too many plot points not to bring them back. Sigh. my favs r lucy n poe n mitchell n hawthorne n steinbeck but I like all of them

Omg omg okay i LOVE thr Guild I spent like 30 minutes last night trying to predict the different Guild members because Autism. (I FUCKING LOOKED UP MARk TWAIN BC I WAS LIKE U CANT HAVE AMRRICAN AUTHORS AN NOT HAVE MARKY YKW??? LIKE HES LItERALLY BROUGHT UP IN EVERY SINGLE LIT CLASS IN AMERICA BRO and nothing came up OU IM SO MAD)

BTW, I tend to use a first name basis with authors btw theyre actually all my best friends i know them on a deeper level (my mom said that i need to seek help today, this is what happens when all yr friendships are superficial as a kid methinks)

anyways. here are my thoughts:

Mr Francy Pants (Francis Scott Key Fitzgerald): i wasn't too opinionated on him til I learned his ability (like i said we need to stop letting white ppl get rich bro...) and then i was like i need this guy dead and then i learned his motive and i was like oh my god hes literally just a guy he wants nothing but to mAKE HIS WIFE HAPPY OUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH so he slays actaully i hope hes alive :((

Louisa May Alcott: LOMLLLLLLLL i love little women so im extremely bias towards her but wtv when Francis was going on his lil rant abt owning her and everything i was like woah now careful abt how you speak to my girl

Nathaniel: Lord....forgive me...... HES SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FINE OH my GODDDD Nathaniel was made for the girlies with complicated relationships with religion i fear (ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME )

Margaret: love me a woman who dresses like that okay but im fairly certain the actual woman was racist soooo kinda mixed feelings?? but the character is amazing and perfect (ignoring the restoring her family's honor.........) and i actually loved her accent lol it was southern enough to be southern but not too southern to be fake lol southern accents actaully arent always there for my area lol they come and go and are stronger when angry/ come out stronger on certain words or phrases loll

Lucy: OUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH seeing that she got caught PAINED ME LIKE NOOOO ATSU WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ABLE TO GO AND SAVE HER BUT NOW I FEAR HES FORGOTTEN IN ALL THE EVERYTHING GOIONG ON OUGHHHHHHHHHH

Anne is SOOO Cutie Pie too btw and I love that one she looks like Anne of Green Gables (obvi) BUT ALSO Raggedy Anns!!!!!

Marky Mark: HES SO CUTE ACTUALLY ???? I love his "im just here for the fun of it" attitude that was rlly nice AND HUCK AND TOM ARE SOOOO CUTE and i love the fact that hes a gunsmith despite im pretty sure the book characters he brought to life and real life author being like these scrappy lil southern boys lolll i like that they didnt go the kenji route with him and have him be like a (read this in a southern accent btw) lil farmer boy with good intentions for everyone :D type character !!!!!! love him 10/10 scrunkly

John Steinbeck: his grape thing freaked me the fuck out the first time he did it i was so thoroughly gagged like...... hes cute but in term of design he and Francy look soo similar I got tired of these basic ass white men sorry TvT (looking at them made me feel like i was watching hetalia again LMAOOO) hes scrunkly poo too tho and i love his quirk (mha gagged with quirk im sooo sorry)

Lovecraft: He rlly puts the love in Lovecr....Im gonna stop there sorry :( that sounded jsut as bad in my head LMAO I LVOE HIM i love the fact that him turning into Kraken is just. smth he can do. not his quirk hes jsut like that. (okay actually he didnt write Kraken so idk what the fuck he turns into but he just like me fr) i love his absolute apathy to everything he rlly is sucha girl like he just wants to sleep fr !!!! he had empty eyes and long lucious hair and thats enough to make me love you so i literally DONT CARE bout NOTHIGN ELSE !!!! 10000/10 hes so fine omg....

Melville: hes actually so chill. i like him! he had honor and standards that he upheld himself and i heavy respect that! going down w yr ship is like the easiest way to gain my respect cuz that troupe >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

AND LAST BUT ABSOLUTELY DEFINETELY NOT LEAST:

Edgar Allan Poe:

do I, Dorian Nico di Marionette (my legal Tumblr name), even need to say anything about how much I love this man. I'm not even just talking about the bsd character. I'm talking about the actual author too. He's literally so cool. Like so cool. He came, he lived, he fucked around and found out, and he died!!! He is literally everything I wish to be. Cool, Autistic, Mysterious, Silly. And now specifically the character: I love his need for praise bc ME tOO. I love that he had given himself ONE PURPOSE and that purpose was to beat Ranpo and give him the mystery of his life like yes girl devote your entire being and existence to that ONE (1) man !!!!!! (me) (we need help)

i love that he has a pet Raccoon esp since the general agreement is that he died of rabies like...... ( i personally think he was murdered but idk... ijust feel like someone didnt like him bc he accomplished alot and they probably couldn)

he and ranpos lil friendhsip warms my lil heart to like................... like i said in my tags they remind me of Hikaru and Kaoru in a way where their world was "us" and "not us" and like they are the only ones who can keep each other on each others toes and constantly getting better and giving the ultimate form of praise (theres nothing like getting praise from someone in your field of work, esp someone that you regard as "better than you") and thats so.......... (and if i say codependcy (I WILL PUSH CODEPENDCY ON EVERYTHING BRO I NEED TO SEEK HELP))

anyways these are my excessive thoughts i need help lol

#mari answers !! #mutuals :> #tia tag 🩵 #bsd 🗞️ #this was osooo fun omg i love answering asks I WIH TUMBLR GAVE MY NOTIFS ABT THRM !!!!

[pmd-etu]

Hey there ETU readers!

[TLDR If you don't want to read the giant blocks of text: ETU is coming back, but in written form, on my AO3 account, come October of this year!]

I know I’ve made posts here and there, between this blog and the main blog saying I’m working on the comic. And this was true! I love ETU, and I loved working on it at the time!

However!

It takes far too long to draw. I made a bunch of black and white pages- but they take just as long to draw as the colored ones in my style, plus [in my opinion] they don’t look as good.

My work schedule is also all over the place, and there's a lot going on in my life that won't be slowing down anytime soon. Finding time to draw a full comic is. Hard. To say the least.

All in all, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to make this a full comic. I simply don’t have the time, energy, or motivation. If I spent every last drop of my free time I could make more pages- but I have other hobbies then art, and I like to draw other things too. Hell, the 80ish pages of ETU that exist barely covered the prologue of the game and they took me two years to draw. The story would have taken decades to finish at that rate.

HOWEVER (2) I love Pokémon mystery dungeon. (Excluding “The Cat Lady”) it is my favorite game of all time, certainly my favorite Pokémon game of all time. It was one of the reasons I got obsessed with OCs and story creation. My first ever written story as a kid was a PMD story! It means a lot to me.

So I’ll be writing (and FINISHING) the story as a written piece. I know that’s not as fun to most people as a comic, but I want to see this story finished one way or another, and this is the most feasible way of me doing so. I’ve been working on ETU since 2016(the comic started in 2019 but that’s when I made Amoris!)and I want it to be completed!

Honestly, my grammer isn't great. And I’m willing to admit that my writing isn’t perfect- I got too self conscious about writing stories for a good 5 years and am just now getting back into it. So what I’m saying is it won’t be perfect- but neither was the original comic, so I hope you’ll enjoy it anyway!

Anyway, it’s going to be up on AO3- I'll be starting it by posting the first 10 chapters weekly! [Will take a break after that for a little while to Ensure I have enough of a buffer between chapter releases to edit to my liking and work on other projects!]

I’ll be posting updates on here when I post new chapters too but I recommend following me on AO3!

https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrinceSheepish [I also write other things there, of course!]

My goal to post the first chapter will be October 1, 2023! [So every Sunday!]

As a bonus though, because I am primarily an artist, I will be drawing scenes and character references for ETU, as I was doing before- those will also be posted here!

#ETU #ETU news

[ducktracy]

What inspired you to be an artist?

OOOOOH this is a weighted question, which i like, so i shall provide a weighted answer! this is really long so for that i apologize

i know it’s a bit of a cliché to say “i’ve been drawing ever since i could pick up a pencil”, but it’s a cliché that’s true because i’ve been drawing ever since i could pick up a pencil! it’s always just been something i’ve known and done. i just knew ever since a very young age i wanted to draw for the rest of my life no matter what the medium—i wanted to be a children’s book illustrator because i adored looking through different books and staring at the illustrations, i knew i wanted to draw cartoons all day because i watched too much TV as a kid (which paid off because i work in TV animation now) and knew i wanted to make or help make characters come alive on a screen, etc etc etc.

it was always just something i KNEW i needed to do and did constantly, i remember my old kindergarten teacher submitting my name in a county wide art competition and i got second place when i was like… 7 years old! THAT’S BRAGGADOCIOS OF ME I REALIZE HAHAHAHA i’m not trying to be a braggart but essentially just trying to illustrate the point that it’s been something i’ve been involved with for a long time and has always been an association

i joined social media at way too young and impressionable of an age, but in the very long run it was beneficial because here i am now. discovering other people could see my drawings and i could draw whatever they wanted really incentivized me to draw more and a LOT, and it just ended up something i’d always be doing. there was a point in time where i’d be drawing 10+ fully rendered drawings (this was in MS Paint so “rendered” is used very liberally) a day for months and months and months on end, and of course having the attention span of a flea means i spent much of my school time doodling and drawing rather than anything super productive

BUT because i don’t want this to be an “it all started when i was born” story, i will say that i always knew i wanted to work in animation as i got older and taught myself how to animate, but never really got serious about considering becoming a professional and thinking about the industry until about 3-4 years ago. getting into Camp Lazlo was incredibly enlightening, i adored (and still do) the wide cast of characters and how distinct all of their personalities are, how music and the backgrounds and certain acting decisions all affect the atmosphere… it was to the point where i was writing essays in high school about how when i die after a lucrative career in cartooning, Joe Murray will be the person i meet in the afterlife and reflect upon my life because he inspired me most and is how i got to where i am. (i feel the need to add that this was based on a writing prompt for my literature class and not something i came up with completely on a whim and i swear i am not as creepy as this sounds)

and of course CL led me to revive/make my own cast of characters, and wanting to study how to make them move nicely or seek inspiration from the classics that i could pour into my characters i turned to Looney Tunes (Tuesday will mark 3 years since i got into it!) since i had heard good things about it… my characters completely got sidetracked because i became positively enraptured at how cartoons could move and sound and look this way, woah, you can track the culture of the period depending on when the shirt was made, wow, they made LT cartoons in black and white, woah, Daffy used to be crazy and likable, dang, i never knew Porky could be so funny and charming, etc etc etc. my Lazlo obsession is what sparked my interest but LT is what really put my nose to the grindstone and made me want to learn about absolutely everything the medium has to offer

this is getting long so i’ll try to begin to wrap it up here, but i always knew i wanted to work in animation and never knew what i wanted to do. i only decided that i wanted to become a storyboard artist not even a month before i got asked to freelance on SpongeBob. this wasn’t even two years ago! but i positively adore storyboarding.

cartoons dominate every aspect of my life, and i know that’s a very “touch grass” inducing statement (and not one i wholly disagree with either) but this personal relationship i’ve had with my art has manifested itself in the form of cartooning. i love cartoons because they’re so personal. this is going to sound ridiculous so bear with me, it’s just an artistic philosophy and i know it sounds silly. but when i draw, i have a very very very personal relationship with the characters i draw, and it’s not something you can really force. i try to get into the minds of my subjects—how do they conduct themselves, what are they thinking, how do they think, how do they talk, how are they responding to me. sometimes it takes a little for them to warm up. gotta break the ice first. but it’s a very communicative process, i like to try and talk to my subjects and communicate with them THROUGH my drawings and talk back and forth to get the best results. and this is one reason why i love storyboarding so much, because my entire job revolves around getting in the heads of these characters. characters like SpongeBob or Daffy or Porky or whoever are very important to me because, again, as ridiculous as this sounds, it’s like i know them!

maybe this is a very lonely thing to say (even though i don’t consider myself a lonely person by any means) but my art is guaranteed company. i have a lot of reasons for why i draw. sometimes it boils down to something as simple as “it’s my job” or “i like it” or is something more complex like “i want to bring others the same happiness and solace art and cartoons and illustration have brung me over the years” or “i want to communicate with these characters because they’re begging to communicate with ME and i can’t just sit here idly and tune out that urge.”

i like to experiment. i have a reputation as “the vintage artist”, and it’s one i’m very happy with! drawing with more traditional and vintage sensibilities in mind isn’t really me trying to pull a “look what i can do” so much as it is just something i feel i HAVE to do, those sensibilities speak to me and the nostalgia and warmth and sincerity of it all impacts me so much i want to share that same warmth with others. but i like to break out of that, too, and try to. one piece i’ll do in a more comic book style, the next one will be painted. one will be more flat with bold colors, the next i’d like to emulate a pencil look.

i try to switch it up and experiment as much as i can (though to be honest i could stand to be more self indulgent, i have many more “experimental” ideas that i don’t act on enough for completely arbitrary reasons and need to break out of that—“if i don’t, who will?” has a tendency to sound self centered but it’s a motto that’s boosted my confidence time and time again) and never settle for just okay. i have a tendency to obsess and can often burn myself out because i operate at a very “all or nothing” attitude and will needlessly fret over very inconsequential details (I WILL NOT BE SMITED IF I DRAW TWO SPONGEBOBS IN A ROW!) but i think that consciousness has allowed me to do a lot of problem solving and thinking i wouldn’t have been able to do otherwise, so as much of a pain as it is, i’m grateful.

I AM SO SORRY THIS IS INCREDIBLY LONG. i promise i’m not trying to sound egotistical or self important in the slightest, i know this is a needlessly elaborate response and has a lot of heightened language that sounds pompous and attention seeking but i truly truly truly truly promise that’s not at all my intent. i just have so much to SAY and it’s something i haven’t thought about much before, so i appreciate you giving me an attitude to blab! TL;DR it’s what i know, and it’s what i enjoy, especially knowing someone else can enjoy it too.

#anonymous #asks #long post

[linisiane]

Netflix’s Wednesday (2022) is for Fanfiction Readers who Actually Liked My Immortal

The first episode features a main character who is too goth and edge-y for the preps at her school. Just like My Immortal’s long descriptions of fish nets and corset outfits, the show seems to have spent more time on the gothic sets and make up over the writing. Wednesday’s gorgeous sets and lovely fashion fare much better than its dialogue or character writing. Though that’s a matter of taste, as I’m sure if I were interested in love triangles with white boys and being not like the other girls, I would have been a lot more interested. 

See, the problem is that I spent the whole episode with a bored sense of deja vu. An outcast girl entering a new school. A queen bee who recently broke up with her ex. Snarky lines about mean girl tropes. Cliques with snappy names. Even the nerd-y boy with asthma. It was clear that they were writing a “high school” show, instead of just a story set in high school. Aren’t writers tired of pushing out this same schlock? After all, I was in high-school recently—I know that high school has more stories to tell than the same, tired 80s high school movie tropes!

And I know that the tropes are tired because My Immortal was already parodying them in the 2000s, in addition to its pitch-perfect fanfiction satire. The structure and charm of the type of stories My Immortal parodies features at least 3 things: a relatable outcast girl main character, a love triangle with two cute white boys, and the main character girl impressing those two cute boys with how quirky she is! Self-insert your heart out!

My Immortal makes fun of how shallow and ego-centric this version of ‘being different’ is. People laugh at how absurd Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way’s name is—the embodiment of a 13 year-old making their first OC stand out by being as special and edge-y as possible. Enoby wears black lipstick and combat boots and flips off all the preps who stare. She’s different but all of it is skin-deep. Whether her gothic love interests—Draco and Vampire—like her is up to whether she’s a stupid prep that wears ‘slutty’ clothes or a goff like one of them.

Wednesday Addams, similarly, is obsessed with being different from her prep peers, never mind that the new school she’s switching to is supposed to be filled with outcasts and weirdos like her family. She’s more weird and mysterious than the rest, don’t you see, with her attempted murder and usage of a typewriter to write her novels, unlike those other squeamish kids with their blogs and cellphones. Every scene she’s in is meant to highlight this, with her threatening one-liner clap-backs or her girlbossily beating up cartoon bullies in front of her normie barista crush or her dramatically playing her cello to vent for the whole campus to love (and of course, who wouldn’t love such masterful playing during study hours). 

The thing that I struggle with is not that the show does this, but rather that it does this with a straight face. We’re passed the time where we can play these cliches straight, as My Immortal demonstrates. I kept waiting for the moment where the show would pull the curtain back from the cliche perspective and reveal a twistier view of this high school narrative, where Wednesday is an edge-y teen girl writing gore-y self-insert fanfiction on a typewriter and alienating herself from the peers that could connect with her out of a fear of rejection, but the way things are going, the show might actually be headed the other way, where her peers, parents, and teachers are actually the ones that need to learn to be more like Wednesday.

Not that that narrative couldn’t work! Just that it doesn’t work here because Wednesday, so far, is the second coming of Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way. Who reads My Immortal and The Addams Family and thinks every character should be more like Enoby?

#wednesday 2022 #wednesday netflix #literary analysis #meta #my thoughts #teen angst aesthetic

[hdawg1995]

Get to know me!

I GOT TAGGED IN A THING! I don't remember the last time that happened! Tagged by: @haelleno Share your wall paper:

its a pixel art i made titled over and over.

Last song you listened to: From Now On We're Enemies. Its a mood and also just makes me feel better on days where I feel too stressed from the nothing I did.

Currently Reading: I'm not gonna lie, i'm currently reading all the non shippy RE fanfics that have sprung up because of the RE4 remake AND a YA book called The Black Dragon Codex. a lot of books haven't been able to draw me in (even this one didn't get my attention right way, i only bought it and started reading it cause its a extension of a fantasy encyclopedia i read as a kid) which really sucks cause i miss reading.

Last Movie: I think it was Glass Onion. Watched it with my mom but she had a hard time paying attention so i spent most of the movie explaining things than enjoying it or following along with the mystery.

What Are You Wearing Right Now: Red Wings shirt number 365 and some running pants. my PJs basicily.

How Tall Are You: i'm 5 foot nothing and some times i'm mad about it but most of the time i'm just glad i don't have to duck into a car or dodge tree branches.

Piercings/Tattoos: they're the same answer so i lumped them together. No. Never gonna happen. I think they're dope on other people but I wouldn't want them.

Glasses/Contacts?: Yup! for most of my life actually! my current pair are blue metal frames that tint blue in the sun. bonus: they have that yellow/blue light layer so looking at screens doesn't hurt my eyes, and i'm told it makes the whites of my eyes tinted blue.

Last Drink: a cold pepsi. nothing special, was just the pop that was in the fridge today.

Last Show: Ghosts (the 2022 version). I watch it with my mom every week, we're having a good time with it and although its mostly second hand embarrassment I like that it puts it on it's head every now and then.

Last Thing You Ate: Dinner! box pasta and some shredded chicken. I wanted to try one of the recipes i found on here but i didn't have most of the stuff i needed.

Favorite Color: Orange! If its orange i'm going to love it and its bright and warm. Runner up colors are blue and green.

Current Obsession: Resident Evil. A friend of mine is playing the remake and i've been watching him stream! and of course the fanfics (although the RE fandom is drinking their horny juice so there isn't actually a lot for me to read at the moment).

Unrelated Obsession: I have been writing little ficlits of my WoL oc being friends with Thancred Waters from ff14 and nothing will stop me from writing about how they are buds.

Any Pets: sadly no. Had a dog who died in 2020 (she was 14 if my math is right). right now closest thing to a pet I have are the three stray cats who use the backyard as a in between since its the only yard without a dog.

Do You Have A Crush On Anyone?: I've given up on perusing crushes. I still have them but I've accepted i'm better off ignoring it than acknowledging it. honestly thought about ignoring this question but i've made it this far!

Favorite fictional character: Thats a long list i'm afraid, so i'll list the same number of characters Haelleno listed. Tomix (DF) Thancred (ff14) Liger Zero (Zoids) Leon Kennedy (RE) Yosuke hanamura (P4) and Arata (Digimon: Cyber Sleuth).

Tag Someone: no :3

#get to know me #aaaand thats why i don't get tagged in things #i don't want to bother people #also i'm in a MOOD sorry