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rose-sophia-isabella-rogers · 7 months

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A Tide That Turned Everything: Chapter IV - I Still Think of You as My Friend

Chapter Summary: You leave to find Morozova's workshop and, hopefully, some clues about the Firebird. You meet Alina and you two finally have an honest conversation. Can you find out where to look for the third amplifier and convince Alina to join Aleksander's side?

Pairing: Aleksander Kirigan/Reader, Alina Starkov/Mal Oretsev, Ivan/Fedyor Kaminsky

Characters: Aleksander Kirigan, Reader, Alina Starkov, Fruzsi, Baghra, Fedyor Kaminsky, Ivan, Vatra, Mal Oretsev

Word Count: 4345

A/N: Inspired by prompts: https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389089584618/ https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389089684652/ https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389089571712/ https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389089683698/ https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389089559872/ https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389089571708/ https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389089683673/ This chapter also contains some plot from episode six of the second season, and one dialogue from the episode fifth of the second season.

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added or removed):

@budugu

@intothesoul

@mizelophsun11

@pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy

@zeeader

You pack things in your chambers. Most of them aren't really yours. You didn't bring anything from the Spinning Wheel. And earlier you didn't bring much from the Little Palace. It makes you a bit sad. Thinking how much you have lost.

There's a knock on the door. You don't turn. Part of you hopes it's Aleksander. Part of you hopes it isn't.

'Come in,' you call. The door opens and someone walks in. Two people. Not Aleksander, then. You're both relieved and disappointed.

'Already packing?' Fedyor asks. You turn. Two of your favourite Heartrenders look at you. Kaminsky is smiling.

'If I want to stand a chance in being there before Alina, then I should leave soon,' you explain.

'You mean "we",' Ivan says. You blink. They straighten up. You smile and shake your head.

'You should stay with General,' you say. They open their mouth to protest. You silence them with a raised hand.

'I will leave feeling better, knowing he has you two by his side,' you say and look at them pleadingly. 'Please.'

Fedyor sighs, while Ivan exhales slowly. You relax, knowing you've won.

'Have it your way,' Kaminsky says and smiles. You smile slightly back and look away.

'But you have to let us choose who's coming with you,' Fedyor says seriously. 'We have to make sure you're going to be safe.'

'Go ahead,' you say with a nod. Fedyor nods back and exchanges a look with Ivan. Kaminsky leaves the room. You turn and return to packing. The Heartrender stares at you in silence.

'Is there something you want to say?' you ask after a moment. Ivan doesn't answer. You look behind your arm and see him staring at you with furrowed eyebrows.

'Ivan?' you ask, confused.

'I thought you'd want to stay close to General after weeks of being separated,' Ivan finally speaks up. Ah. You turn your sight.

'I can be more of use by going after the Firebird and Alina,' you say. 'I'm more than his lover, you know.’

'I know that,' Ivan says. 'I… We just thought…'

'Yes?' you ask. You turn to look at him again. Ivan stares at you.

'We thought that after all that happen you and General would be alright again,' he finishes. You smile sadly at him.

'I thought so, too,' you say and look down. 'I hoped for it. But he…'

You trail off. You remember how suddenly he pushed away. And how he keeps to the shadows whenever he speaks with you.

'I feel we're even further away than before,' you say. 'I still love him and I'll fight for us, but… it hurts.'

Ivan walks to you. He puts a hand on your shoulder.

'Fedyor was there when you called him,' he says. 'He later told me how they were talking and suddenly, he froze. He's always calm and collected, but at that moment emotions flashed on his face. Disbelief, hope, joy… and then fear, panic, anger. He told us all to get ready at once. He loves you. I don't know why he acts like that… but you must know he cares about you more than about anyone.'

You smile sadly at him. Ivan looks at you softly and pulls you in for a hug. You close your eyes, stopping the tears from falling. You press yourself against him, needing this hug so much.

There's another knock on the door. Ivan pulls away from you. You take a step back.

'Come in,' you call. The door opens and Aleksander walks in. Your heart skips a beat. He puts his hands behind his back.

'Ivan, can I have a moment alone with [Y/N]?' he asks.

'Certainly, General,' Ivan says. He squeezes your shoulder and leaves, closing the door behind him. You look at Aleksander. His eyes meet yours.

'Are you here to convince me to not go?' you ask. Aleksander shakes his head.

'I know you well enough not to do this,' he denies. 'I just… want to ask you to be careful.'

'I will,' you promise, nodding your head. For a moment you stare at each other in silence.

'Is there something else?' you ask, barely managing to mask hope. Aleksander exhales slowly.

'There is,' he answers. 'I… Since there's a chance you'll meet with Miss Starkov, I want to be the one to tell you this, rather than her.'

Your heart stops. No. He can't mean… Saints, no. You can't lose him to her again. Anything but that.

'Tell me what?' you ask. Aleksander gulps.

'Because of the Stag… there is a… connection between her and me,' he explains, causing you to frown. 'We've met a few times in dreams, both of us thinking it's just that. But they're not. I was also able to… show myself to her as a projection. She saw me and I saw her, but my body wasn't there.'

You try to process it. Then, you remember how the day you arrived here he was in his room, his back to you, his hand extended.

'That's what you were doing after we got here,' you say quietly. Aleksander doesn't deny.

'She can do that as well,' he says and your eyes snap to his. 'She visited me once. I think she was hoping to break the connection. I didn't let her get close enough to me to do it.'

'Why?' you ask before you can stop yourself.

'It can prove useful,' Aleksander explains and hesitates before slowly taking your hand in his. 'It's nothing more, milaya. You're the one on my mind. In fact, I dreamt of you more often than of her.'

You look at him with hope. He smiles softly at you.

'You dreamt of me?' you ask quietly. Aleksander moves his hand to your neck. You almost close your eyes.

'Very often,' he says. 'We were talking, missing each other. I wished so much our conversations were real. And that you'd tell me where you are. You were always so sad. Once, you said that you want to see me. Hold me. Hug me. Touch me. Kiss me. Cuddle with me. Love me. That it would stop you from being sad.'

You freeze. No. No way.

'And I told you that-' Aleksander starts.

'That you want it,' you interrupt him. 'So much.'

Aleksander stares at you with surprise. Your heart is beating fast.

'You said I looked beautiful on the night of the fete,' you continue. 'And that I was extraordinary during my performance.'

Aleksander's eyes go wide. You shake your head, still not believing it.

'So, it was real?' you ask. 'We… But how? We don't have such connection as you and Alina.'

'I think we do,' Aleksander says and grabs your necklace with his hand. On this hand is his ring that is the pair to it.

'David did a better job than we thought,' he says and cups your face. '[Y/N], I want you to know-'

He's interrupted by a knock. He closes his eyes, controlling his emotions.

'I'm very popular today,' you say, amused. 'Come in.'

The door opens. Fruzsi enters and puts her arms behind her back.

'I'm sorry, General, but you are needed,' she says. Aleksander nods, not looking away from you.

'Promise me you'll use it if you need it,' he asks. You smile slightly.

'I will,' you swear. Aleksander kisses your forehead. You hope for more but he turns and leaves with Fruzsi. Things are still not okay between you two. But you have now hope they will be.

Along with you are five Grisha. One Healer named Ted (Aleksander, Fedyor and Ivan insisted), one Squaller named Jordan, one Durast named Gerard and two Inferni – Vatra and Stefan. They're not very talkative. And neither are you. You have hand on your chest, feeling a little vial hidden there, and think about your conversation with Aleksander before your departure.

I need to ask you a favour.

You know you can ask me anything.

I need your blood.

… Come again?

I don't understand most of Morozova's writings. But the topic of blood comes up very often. I'm sure he has some security measures defending his workshop. I suspect something that involves his blood. And the blood of his descendant-

May be the key. Yes. That may be true. My brilliant [Y/N].

He went to Vladim for a vial and cut his forearm without hesitation. He put it in the vial and handed it to you, then a Healer patched him up. You were touched by how much he trusts you. Enough to give you his own blood.

'How far yet?' Jordan asks. 'Should we start searching for a place for a camp?'

'No,' you deny, shaking your head. 'If I'm right, it should be somewhere here.'

True enough, not long after you come to a place hidden by roots of a tree. It looks like a tomb.

'Now what?' Ted asks. 'The roots are covering the door.'

'I can burn them,' Stefan offers. You shake your head.

'We can't let anyone know we're here,' you say and tilt your head. 'I remember from school that plants are up to 90% water. What if…'

You bring your hands together and focus on the roots. After a nervous moment they slowly move, uncovering the door covered with markings. You smile, while others stare at you, impressed.

'There is no doorknob,' Jordan points out and looks at Gerard. 'Can you open it? Or we can try pushing it?'

You climb to the door. You take out the vial and pour some of Aleksander's blood on your finger. Then you press it to the place where normally would be a doorknob. The door rumble and open.

'Not at all omnious,' Vatra murmurs.

'Come on,' you say and take a step forward. But the Stefan grabs your arm. You look at him, surprised.

'General would kill us of something happened to you,' he says, giving you a pointed look. He walks in first, creating a ball of fire to give you some light. You all follow him. You with a blush on your cheeks. You force the roots to go back to their place and close the door.

Inside you find two tombs. You walk past them. You walk into another chamber that used to be Morozova's workshop. It looks as if it was suddenly abandoned. As if the owner was going to come back here.

'So, what are we looking for?' Vatra asks.

'For any mention of the Firebird,' you answer. 'Start looking through the journals. Something must be here.'

You and your companions start searching. Until suddenly you hear a rumbling, letting you know the door is opening. You all freeze, alarmed.

'Hide, now,' you order. You all quickly back away from the workshop. The Infernis blow out the fireballs and you hide in some nook. Just in time, as Alina, Mal and Baghra walk past you. Thankfully, they don't notice you.

You listen to their conversations with tension in your bodies. You fear to be discovered. Your heart breaks for Alina, listening how Mal lets her go so she could stitch Ravka back together. Then he follows Baghra to the room with tombs. You nod at two Infernis, They follow carefully behind them, to listen to their conversation. A moment later you see them leaving.

'When they will be coming back, warn me and slow them down,' you say to the remaining three. 'Don't interrupt us. And don't you dare hurting Mal nor Baghra. No matter what.'

Your companions hesitate, but leave. You take in a deep breath. It's time for a confrontation with Alina.

Slowly, you enter the workshop. Alina's back is turned to you. She's looking thorough the journals and papers. You put your hands behind your back.

'Fancy meeting you here,' you speak up. Alina jumps, startled, and whirls around with a ball of light in her hands. She freezes, seeing you. You raise your eyebrows. The light goes out.

'[Y/N],' Alina gasps and takes a step forward, as if wanting to hug you. But she stops herself and eyes you carefully. You calmly stare back at her.

'How did you get in here?' she asks and then her eyes widen in fright. 'Mal-'

'He's safe,' you interrupt her and slowly walk around the room. 'I do not wish him harm. Nor you.'

'And yet you left with Aleksander,' Alina says. 'Why? After everything he's done, all the suffering he caused-'

'Because he's all I have,' you interrupt her. She looks at you with hurt.

'What about me?' she asks. 'And Mal?'

You scoff and shake your head. Alina frowns at you.

'You never noticed how much pain you were causing me,' you say bitterly. 'Or in how big pain I was in the Spinning Wheel.'

'Why didn't you say something?' Alina fires back. 'I would have listened to you. I would… stop pursuing Aleksander. I would be your friend. But I had no idea how you feel.'

'Oh, don't be a child,' you scoff. 'I'm sure you heard rumours. About me and Aleksander. Maybe not that we're in love with each other but that we're sleeping together.'

Alina blushes and looks away. Of course she heard.

'You never confirmed them to me,' she defends herself.

'You don't confirm such things,' you say, shaking your head. Alina gets frustrated.

'But how could you fall for him?' she asks.

'Same way you did,' you answer, staring back at your friend. 'I saw magic in his eyes. Dirty, black, beautiful magic.'

You smile softly. You think about your special moments with Aleksander.

'From the moment we met, he's seen me like no one else does,' you say. 'He knew right from the start I was special. He was ready to be with me even when I still was just a servant… an otkazat'sya. He sees me, Alina. He sees me and… he calls me beautiful like it's my name. No one has ever made me feel like he does.'

'And how many times did he put you in danger?' Alina asks.

'And all but once he came to save me,' you retort. 'And I know he will continue to do it. I trust him with my life. I trust him with my heart.'

'[Y/N]… he's… he's evil,' Alina tries to put some sense into you. 'He's… he's devil or maybe even worse! How can you love someone like that?'

'Do you remember how my parents treated me? Even before I was Grisha? Even before my sister died? I've… felt unloved for such a long time. Aleksander was the first one to show me I deserve to be loved.'

'Tommy loves you as well. I know he does. I saw how he looks at you. Natasha and Jana also confirmed he has feelings for you.'

'I know. But I needed something he can't give me. I wanted something more. Surely you understand that.'

Alina looks away. Because she does. She feels what Aleksander told her. That she was meant for more. She wants that more.

'I don't care if I fall in love with a devil, as long as that devil will long me the way he loves hell,' you say softly. Alina looks at you with a hard look.

'Then why he was hiding your relationship from everyone?' she asks. 'Why was he hurting you? Why I'm the one that shares a bond with him?'

Her words feel like a slap. Because she says what you feel. It hurts he was never honest how he feels about you with others. It hurts how he was flirting with Alina, how he kissed her, how he still thinks of her. But that bond…

'You're not the only one that was meeting with him in dreams,' you say. Starkov looks at you with surprise. You touch your necklace. You're sure David has already told her about it. She looks at it and you see she understands.

'You lied to David telling him you had lost it,' she says, her tone accusatory. You sigh and look down.

'Believe me, I feel bad about it,' you say. 'But I couldn't have any of you knowing about it. I needed this in case…'

You trail off and exhale shakily. Alina frowns. She opens her mouth, ready to ask you why did you call him in the end. But you're quicker.

'He hurt me, yes,' you say. 'He hurt many other people. No, he's not perfect. He's human and flawed, but he's perfect to me and that's all that matters.'

Alina looks at you pleadingly. You know this situation hurts her and you hate it. But you can't abandon Aleksander.

'[Y/N], please,' Starkov says. 'I know you hate seeing people hurt. And if you side with Aleksander, more people will get hurt. Please, choose the right side.'

'Don't,' you say harshly. 'Don't do that. Don't make me choose. Every time I'll pick him. Every time. And I can't have you hate me for that.'

You have tears in your eyes. So does Alina. But you manage to give her a sure look.

'I'm with him,' you say. 'For better or for worse.'

'It'll probably be worse,' Alina points out. You smile.

'I knew that the day I met him,' you say, remembering how you were sent to bring him breakfast after his former personal servant was moved to the Grand Palace. How things have changed since then…

'I believe in him, Alina,' you say. 'He can fix this country. Make it so Grisha can feel safe.'

'So can Nikolay and he can do it without killing those that oppose him,' Alina says, her look hardening. 'He believes that Grisha and otkazat'sya can live together in harmony. He can keep everyone safe.'

'And where was he when his brother's soldiers tortured me and even-' you spat with venom but cut yourself off. Alina looks at you with wide eyes. She starts to suspect what happened. You take in a deep breath.

'When they attacked the Little Palace, I rushed to get children out safely,' you say. 'I did it but I had to buy them some time. I got caught. I wasn't imprisoned long, but during those days they hurt my body in ways I never imagined. I was beaten, cut, tied and hung in very uncomfortable positions. They didn't even realise who I am at first. So, all of that was because I am a Grisha. And when they realised who I am they planned on worse things. But I managed to escape before it. But not completely. They did it to me in the end…'

'"Worse things"?' Alina asks, dreading the answer. Your look darkens.

'One day Vasily came to my room,' you say. 'In the Spinning Wheel. He wanted to… how did he put it… "a bit attention from me whenever he asks".'

Alina stares at you with wide eyes. You smile wryly at her.

'I refused, of course,' you say. 'Same as I did when he asked me to spy on Aleksander for him. He made my life difficult then… and this time as well. His soldiers, same that had tortured me, entered. He left, because he wanted me to come for this to him. Naive fool. But his soldiers… they… took advantage of me.'

You exhale shakily. Alina looks at you with pain. You blink away the tears.

'I was… scared… and alone… and it hurt so much… I just wanted to feel safe… loved…' you say. 'So, I called Aleksander.'

'Why didn't you say something?' Alina asks, crying for you. 'To me, to Nikolay, to anyone…?'

'It was my word against theirs,' you explain, shaking your head. 'Before someone would believe me, I'd already be executed for treason.'

Alina opens her mouth. She wants to deny it… but she knows you're right.

'Nikolay is different,' she says. You smile.

'I know,' you agree. 'And it hurt me to turn my back on him.'

'You can still come back,' Alina says with hope.

'No one will welcome me or trust me now,' you say, shaking your head. 'There's no coming back for me now. But you can still change your mind. You and Aleksander can change the world. Let Grisha feel save.'

'Would you really let me to get close to him again?' Alina asks. You smile sadly.

'To save Grisha?' you ask. 'Yes.'

Alina stares at you with disbelief. She opens her mouth to say something. But is interrupted by a roar of fire.

You and Alina run out of the workshop to find complete chaos. Everything is on fire. Baghra and Mal are trying to block Grisha's attacks. It looks like they're all going to be dead soon.

'I seem to remember telling them not to hurt Mal nor Baghra,' you sigh, pinching your nose. 'Unless that's their idea of a distraction…'

'Well, it's distracting enough,' Alina scoffs and calls on the light. You grab her hand. She glares at you. You glare back at her.

'Don't you dare hurting them,' you growl.

'Oh, and they can hurt us?' Alina says through gritted teeth. You squeeze her hand.

'Let me get through to them and we will leave,' you say.

'Do you really expect me to just let you go?' Alina asks with disbelief.

'You could come with us,' you say quietly. Starkov shakes her head.

'No,' she says. 'I will never join you. Tell that to Aleksander.'

You stare at each other sadly. You know that next time you see each other, it will be on the battlefield, on opposite sites. You let go of her.

'I'll never forget our friendship,' you say and turn.

'Neither will I,' Alina calls after you. 'I can't say the same about him. Just ask him what he did to Genya.'

You stand still for a moment, then walk away. Infernis notice you at once and force flames not to hurt you. You join your Grisha.

'That's your idea of a distraction?' you ask. Jordan shrugs.

'It worked,' he says. He puts barrier of air around you and you walk out of the cave. But before you do, your eyes meet Baghra's. She mouths something to you.

Save him.

You nod and leave. You rush to your horses. You climb on top of them and gallop away toward your hideout.

'So, I'm guessing she's not changing sides?' Gerard asks. You shake your head.

'It was a complete waste of time,' you sigh.

'Not exactly…' Stefan says slowly. You turn your head, frowning.

'Explain,' you say. Others exchange a look.

'We heard Baghra and the tracker talking,' Vatra says. 'And we watched them.'

They tell you what Baghra told Mal. About her sister being resurrected by Morozova as a third amplifier. How this ability passed on through generations… until Mal. She proved it to him by telling him to open the door with his blood. It opened. You can't believe it.

'Not a word of it to General,' you order and see their confused faces. 'I… I'll explain everything to him. When I'll be telling him about my conversation with Alina.'

They accept this explanation. For some time, you continue to ride in silence. Until you hear a twig snap.

You all stop, alerted. This is a mistake, as at once you find yourself surrounded by a small party of the First Army.

'The Darkling's Grisha,' one of them spats. 'Get them!'

'Can we hurt them?' Stefan asks. You nod grimly. The party advances on you… and the fight begins.

It's not long. There's more of them, but not much and you have your powers. But still one of them manages to take you by surprise.

You gasp when you suddenly feel pain in your side. You fall on your knees and prepare for death. But Vatra saves you.

'Saints, we're dead,' she groans and turns. 'Ted, we need-'

She cuts herself off. You know what she's looking at. You noticed it a second before your fall. Ted is dead. So is Gerard. You feel tears in your eyes. You failed them.

'We're near our hideout,' Jordan says. 'While I don't like how close to it they were, we can manage to get her to others in time.'

'And then General will kill us all,' Stefan says grimly. They manage to put you on your horse. They climb on theirs and you gallop to your hideout. You are bended forward and grip reins tightly. You can do it. You can do it…

You almost cry with relief when you ride on the courtyard. Your companions jump off their horses.

'Healer!' Vatra shouts. 'Now!'

Your vision blurs. But you still see Aleksander coming out of the mansion. He rushes downstairs.

'What's going on?' he asks and freezes, seeing your pale face and bloodied kefta. '[Y/N]…'

'Aleksander…' you say with relief and fall from your horse. Straight into Aleksander's arms.

'[Y/N], no,' he says, panicked, and cups your face. 'Stay with me. Stay with me, do you hear me?! Please! I can't lose you! Not again…'

He cries. You smile weakly at him. You caress his face, breathing heavily. You're slipping. You can feel it.

'Healer!' Aleksander screams. Just then someone kneels by your side. You sigh, feeling the pain lessening. You close your eyes and soon you're unconscious.

'She'll be alright, General,' the Healer says quietly. Aleksander caresses your relaxed face.

'How did this happen?' he asks coldly.

'A party of the First Army sneaked out on us not far from here,' Stefan answers. 'We lost Ted and Gerard.'

Aleksander nods and picks you up bridal style. He turns to the door but first looks at gathered Grisha.

'Fruzsi?' he asks. The Tidemaker comes forward.

'General?' she asks.

'Take down the First Army encampments,' he orders.

'Understood,' Fruzsi says with a smile. 'We will refocus our efforts. And what of the Sun Summoner?'

Aleksander looks at your face. He feels anger boiling in him.

'The whole world will hear it… when I make her scream,' he answers and climbs up the stairs to the mansion.

A/N: Thank you for reading! Let me know your thoughts! Reblog, like and comment if you could.

This can also be found on Archive of Our Own: https://archiveofourown.org/works/49965037/chapters/126532174

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titlemewickedwonderland · 1 year

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Ghoul Game Night Intro

Summary: Everyone played the same as at least once in their life no matter their species - Ghoul or Human alike. It's a popular game played by the Siblings of Sin. But what happens when Papa's newly summoned Ghulah gets stuck playing it as a way to get to know her new pack? Well, they find they enjoy the doe eyes and flush.

Fandom: Ghost Band (Sweden Band)

Pairing: Poly-Version with multiple versions.

Triggers: Spiciness, sexual tension, maybe some fonding, dirty talk, shit-talking, shy ghoulish, and more.

Auth. Note: Let me know if you want to be tagged for a specific ghoul's turn or join the tag list for the entire series!

Workshop Hub!

She didn't trust that smile. It was too straight. Too white. Too perfect...and all Swiss. Had she known that she'd be stuck with Papa's ghouls she may have thought to reconsider her contract. It was not as if Papa was in desperate need to add to his collection - he had only summoned her at Sister Imperator's prompting. Not that it should have made her feel any less unwelcome than she had...it was them that she was concerned about. It had been so long since she'd had the company of other Ghouls and Ghulahs that she felt so out of place within the pack dynamic. She was essentially the baby of the group; newly summoned not more than a few weeks during the most critical and hectic time of the Ghost Projet too that she didn't have the unholy graces to be able to bond with her new pack members until just now.

And what would you have thought if you were cornered during your decompressing stages at the end of the crazy day by you're so-called 'family'. If she were anything like the Ghoulettes of Papa's pack like Cumulus, Cirrus, and Sunshine Y/n would have had the backbone to stand up against the charming menace. But she wasn't. She was simply Y/n. And she was shy as fuck with no backbone to speak of.

Swiss' body was lithe with muscles beneath the black dress shirt and his skin a ashen grey that did little to hide the strength of veins and muscle of his arms from being on display as he casually raised them to grab the top edge of her door frame as his unmasked face peered down at her.

"I-I'm sorry?" she finally squeaked out while gripping the edge of her tail staring up at him like a mouse under the gaze of a hungry feline.

"I said~" Swiss drawled flashing a cocky fanged grin as if he knew what he did to his new pretty little packmate "It's been such a hectic couple of weeks, yeah? You haven't had the chance to properly get to know us right? So, why don't you join us for game night? It'd be so purrfect." his voice vibrated in a pure on that last word causing Y/n to swallow and cast her gaze down to her feet and flush.

"I-I don't think I'm up for it tonight. I'm sorry, It's just been a long day. I'm going to tuck myself into bed...m-maybe another night?" she stuttered softly

"Aye, you've been saying that for the last few times that we've asked. No more excuses; let's go pipsqueak." Dewdrop's head popped into the visible space from behind Swiss' towering frame with a disdainful expression on his face as he scratched idly at his horn.

"I'm not making an excuse!" the Ghulah replied wide-eyed as she snapped her read up to stare at the Fire Ghoul. "I am really tired! Papa had me practicing the recent songs and-"

"Nah, none of that. No excuses kit. Come on. It'll be fun! Don't psych yourself out too much." Aether's calmer voice spoke from somewhere behind the multi-ghoul and spitfire.

Y/n's fang pierced her bottom lip nervously as she shifted on her feet and the grey skin beneath her mask flushed when Swiss groaned from in front of her. "Shit, sweetcheeks. If you don't come out here and play with us...I'll give you something to play with lookin' like that."

"I'll play!" the younger demon yelped and ducked between the two at her bedroom door and found Aether standing with his back against the wall across from her room and his broad arms crossed over his chest.

Y/n felt far less threatened in the presence of the quintessence ghoul; perhaps it was because he could feel her emotions. Perhaps it was the fact that he could calm her if she panicked. Or maybe it was because outside of the rest of the pack upon summoning it was he who had been there every step of the way to be able to help her acclimate to her new home and body.

"Damn. I was seriously hoping she'd refuse." Swiss grumbled only to yelp when Aether whacked him on the ass as he passed by with Y/n by his side nearly gluing herself to his side.

"Come on, kit. Mountain and Rain are getting the common room ready for us." Aether told her with an arm slung around her shoulders protectively making her sag a bit in relief to be under his metaphorical wing.

They entered the common room to find bean bags, pillows, cushions, and blankets laid out on the floor. The couch had been shoved to the side askew and the coffee table had been shoved to the outer edge of the makeshift gaming floor. Amongst the piles of comfort were bottles, cans, bags, and boxes filled with different assortments of junk food, candy, and drinks for their pleasure throughout the night.

Shyly, Y/n took a slow descent into a pile of blankets realizing slowly by the mixture of different scents that they came from each of the ghouls that were making themselves comfortable on the floor around her. But unfortunately, the Ghoulettes were not here for the game night; something about Aether mumbling a girls' date night or something.

A throat cleared softly off to her side and she whipped it around to find herself looking into the curious but kind eyes of Rain - the Water Ghoul was looking at her. He raised a hand to his face silently and Y/n blinked at him confused until his soft voice spoke up.

"Are you going to take that off?"

Y/n blinked again before she looked around realizing a few things. One, all the ghouls surrounding her wore their sleep clothes and were comfy. And two, they didn't wear their masks. She was the only one wearing hers and she swallowed feeling her hands tremble; grabbing a fistful of the soft blanket in her lap when she'd realized with a start that she hadn't...well she hadn't taken her mask off in front of them before. She usually hid away after duties were done and it was only through the door did they ever really speak. This would be the first time she'd be revealing herself if she had the courage to do it.

"I mean...if you aren't comfortable yet that's okay I know-" Rain began but Y/n shook her head quickly and gave a small smile.

"I...I honestly didn't really um...think about it before." she swallowed thickly thinking of what they might think of her if she did take off her mask.

"If you can't...may I? If it's easier." Rain offered to raise his hands to hover on either side of her head in silent permission or invitation she wasn't quite sure.

But she nodded her permission anyway before she could back out and Rain was gentle as he grabbed the edge of her mask and began to pull it from her head. Her hair came down first like a soft sheen of shiny color and her eyes shone like liquid gold up at him causing a tinge of blush to cross his features as he stared flabbergasted at her. She felt herself panic thinking perhaps she looked funny but as she reached for the mask again she was brought back to reality as Swiss whistled.

"Beautiful...."

She flushed and ducked her head only for her to look back up when a larger figure came to sit on her free side. A large warm hand plopped down onto her head between her horns and rubbed affectionately. She stared up at the towering Mountain - realizing just how small she was compared to him but everyone was small compared to Mountain, still - she appreciated the affectionate touch as he shot her a small smile. He did not say a word to her but she gave him a nod as if she understood his unspoken language and instead tucked her knees to her chest; resting her cheek against the soft blanket that smelled like a bonfire, and crisp autumn leaves with a hint of cinnamon. Dewdrop. This must have been his blanket - the scent was warm and it relaxed her nerves a bit as she rubbed her cheek against it before looking around the others.

"So...what are we playing then?"

Aether cleared his throat and picked up two cardboard boxes. "Truth or Dare...Ghoul's version." his lips curled into a teasing grin.

"What's the difference?" Y/n spoke up looking around with a squinted stare as snickers escaped from a few members.

"It's sort of like...spin the bottle and truth or dare combined." Aether began holding up the two boxes.

"You spin this bottle here..." Dew piped up grabbing an empty beer bottle.

"And whoever it lands on gets to choose truth or dare to ask you...the twist to it is you don't get to decide on the truth or dare....you pick it out of the box at random."

Y/n frowned over at Swiss before pointing at the boxes. "And what happens if I don't want to do whichever one my partner picks?" she questioned suspiciously.

"You take a shot." Dewdrop grinned waving a full unopened bottle of fireball. Typical.

"You game sister?" Swiss added leaning over with a wicked gleam in his eye.

It took a moment for Y/n to reply. Weighing her options. But at last, she gave a firm nod. "Well, if I'm to be part of your pack...I-I suppose seeing the worst up front is a good way to start."

"Excellent, let the chaos begin!" Dewdrop grinned throwing back a premade shot for himself.

Dewdrop Ver. Swiss Ver. Aether Ver. Rain Ver. Mountain Ver.

#Ghost Band #Ghost Swedish band #Ghost Band fandom #Ghouls #ghost ghouls #nameless ghouls #aether ghoul #dewdrop ghoul #swiss ghoul #rain ghoul #mountain ghoul #truth or dare #spin the bottle #Ghost one shots

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poledancingdinos · 1 year

Text

You've Got Me Hooked - Epilogue

Pairing: Captain Syverson x OFC (Riley McKenzie)

Word count: 4K

Warnings: Sex work, Stripper, OnlyFans, Smut, Breeding kink, Hospital, Childbirth

Catch up: Series Masterlist

Taglist: @amberangel112 @utterlyhopeful-fics @marantha @kebabgirl67 @littleone65 @omgkatinka @luclittlepond @marytudorbrandon @enchantedbytomandhenry @narnianaos @foxyjwls007 @peaches1958 @identity2212 @summersong69 @liecastillo @islacharlotte @evansabove1981 @eskiix @lilacwineandthesinkingsunmain @tryingtoliveonmywishes @geralts-yenn

A/N: OMG THIS IS IT. THIS IS THE CONCLUSION TO THEIR LITTLE STORY 😭 I'm really emotional and grateful to all you guys for following this journey with me. Expect a cheeky little bonus scene in the next week.

I don't think I'll ever be completely over these two. I'd love to hear what you guys think happens along the way in this universe. Who knows, I might even write a few more bonus scenes 🥰

If you want to be added or removed from my taglist, let me know! If your name is crossed out, I can’t tag you for some reason.

Masterlist

6 months later

"You're up early."

Riley lifts her head from whatever she’s preparing and greets me with a smile.

"Actually I'm up late. I just got back."

I let out a low whistle, settling on the stool across the island from Riley. "Damn, that's a long day. Didn't you leave the apartment mid-afternoon yesterday?"

I’m sure she texted me around two to let me know she was leaving. When our work schedules conflict too much we still just sleep in our own rooms to avoid waking each other up. I didn’t expect her by my side but I also didn’t expect her to still be awake at this hour.

"It was a long day but I had a bunch of things that needed to get done before I went to the club. Then there was this celebration thing for one of the girls who’s leaving and, of course, there was no food, just booze. I'm starving."

She moves to the pantry and pulls out a loaf of bread then rifles through the spices above the stove. The big hoodie she’s wearing — my hoodie — rides up, exposing the tiny flannel shorts she’s wearing underneath. I should probably help her reach what she needs but that thought comes second to admiring the view. She looks adorable. I can’t help but think back to how she was when I first moved in. How she used to hide but was still always unashamedly herself.

"I was just making French toast if you want any," she offers, setting the ingredients down on the counter.

I’ve never been much of a cook beyond my regular bacon and eggs or most combinations of meat and potatoes. I normally take care of myself in the mornings though if she cooks before going to bed she always leaves me some. French toast sounds way better than whatever I can manage.

"I'd fucking love some. Ya need any help?"

"Nope, it's all good. You have time to shower while I finish this up."

"Yes, ma'am." I give her a mock salute that makes her giggle and head off to the hall bathroom.

When I get back to the kitchen I have a pair of coveralls on over some loose shorts. It’s hot as hell right now in the workshop so I try to keep the clothes to a minimum. I have coveralls zipped only halfway with the sleeves tied around my waist to keep from stepping on them.

Riley turns her head as she hears me approach, her eyes lingering on my bare chest. I have a black tank top hanging out of my back pocket for later but I figured I’d let her look her fill first.

She seems to remind herself that she still has a hot cast-iron in her hand and shakes her head in order to return her focus to preparing our two plates. She slides them into place on the island then goes back for our coffee, pouring two large mugs. Riley has this superpower where she can down about a gallon of coffee and still be dead to the world in bed ten minutes later.

We eat in comfortable silence with me occasionally sneaking a treat or two down to Aika. Unfortunately she chews so loudly that there is no way Riley doesn’t notice it even if she’s practically falling asleep with her head in her plate.

I take our dishes to the sink and start to fill it with hot water but Riley comes up behind me, wrapping her arms around my waist and placing a kiss between my shoulder blades.

"Hey, don't bother yourself with those, I'll get them in a few hours when I get up for the day."

I turn in her hold and she sets her chin on my chest to look up at me.

"I can't do that, my Mama raised me better than to leave a lady with the dishes after she cooks me a meal." I lean down, stealing a slow kiss. Well, I guess it’s not really stealing if she’s happy to oblige. “Go get some sleep, darlin’.”

She nuzzles her head into my chest and squeezes me even tighter. “In a minute. I’m not done hugging you yet.”

“I love you,” I say as I place a kiss to the top of her head.”

“Love you too,” she mumbles back.

12 months later

Riley

I keep staring at my computer, expecting the numbers to somehow change or for some pop up to open and plaster the word “PSYCH” on the screen but the display doesn’t change. I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting here, only moving to slide my fingers over the trackpad when the screen goes dark.

Balance remaining to be paid: $0.00.

I can’t believe it. I’m finally, finally free. A while back I paid off the last of my credit card debt and today, I made the last payment on my student debt. It’s finally over. My days of working three jobs and losing over half my wages to loan payments are over.

I should be happy but somehow I’m mostly terrified because now… Now I actually have to choose. Before, stripping and running my OnlyFans seemed like my only options. No one was hiring and I had no way of proving my worth to a potential employer anyway.

Now I have the chance to give up one of the three jobs. I guess it would have to be the diner since that’s the one that pays the least and since the club and the OnlyFans sort of feed into one another.

Or I could keep doing what I’m doing now. I’ll be able to start living a more normal, less restrictive life or maybe I’ll start putting whatever I used to reserve for loan payments into some savings. That seems like a smart thing to do.

Then why does it feel like both of those options make me a coward?

“Your thoughts are really loud.” I look up to find Sy settling in the chair beside me at the table. “What’s wrong?”

“Do you think I could keep doing what I’m doing? Running my OnlyFans and working in clubs, I mean.”

“What, like, as your career?” I nod. “Yeah, I guess for a while. Don’t know much ‘bout it but it seems to me like something people only do for five, maybe ten years at most.”

That’s true. The oldest stripper at the club is maybe in her early forties but she spends a lot of money on trying to look younger. The men who come to us tend to get bored when there isn’t a fresh batch of newly legal dancers every now and then. I’ve changed clubs a lot in the last year to keep the money from drying up.

“What’s really botherin’ ya, sweetheart?”

“I never thought about… after. Like, I knew eventually I wouldn’t have to dance but I didn’t… I didn’t really let myself believe I would make it out. And now that I can…”

“You’re scared,” he finishes for me.

“Yeah,” I whisper.

Sy pushes his chair back enough to pull me to sit sideways on his lap. I love it when he does this — when he just holds me to let me know I’m not alone.

“When I got discharged… I felt lost. I’d given 17 years to the army where every decision was made for me. Sure as a Captain I told people what to do but most of the time I was just passin’ on whatever orders the higher ups had given me.”

It’s weird to think that a man like Sy felt lost. Or scared. It feels like I’m the one having constant meltdowns and he’s holding me steady through the storm.

“If ya keep dancin’ that’s your decision. But I don’t want ya to keep doin’ it because it’s familiar. You should do it because that’s what ya want deep down. I know you must be terrified of fuckin’ everything up because that’s exactly how I felt when I came home. You’re worried that you’ll make the wrong choice so you’re tryin’ to avoid choosin’ at all but I see that sparkle in your eye every time Don calls ya up for help. Don’t pass that up.”

I pull my socked feet up, curling myself into a little ball on Sy’s lap. He happily shifts his hold to hug me closer as I press my face into the crook of his neck. I do love working with Don. And I think I might actually be good at it too. Sy’s right. It’s time.

“I might need you to make that speech again in a few weeks.”

“I’ll tell ya again and again until it sticks. You’re amazin’, Ri. You can do this.”

I can do this.

“Okay. I’ll shut everything down tonight.”

21 months later

“The purchase orders for the parts are in this file. You’ll want to double check the invoices from Collins, the new girl they hired is still getting used to their computer system and sometimes bills the same part twice. I had Sy change the code for the safe to your birthday and the bills for tomorrow’s pick-ups are all filled out and ready to print unless there are last minute changes.”

Riley is talking about a million miles a minute. Since she took over managing RD’s she’s been practically impossible to pull away from that desk. Convincing her to go up to a cabin with me for a week was no easy feat.

“Miss McKenzie, I ran this place for damn near 40 years, I think I can manage one week without your assistance. Now get, you and Sy both deserve the time off.”

Riley looks around, seemingly trying to decide if she’s forgotten to mention anything important. She eventually nods and throws her duffle bag over her shoulder. It’s packed to the brim with everything she needs for the next week but if I have my way, she won’t be wearing any of her clothing. Well, maybe that new order of lingerie she doesn’t know I know about could be the exception.

I hold out the keys to the truck, not moving from where I’m leaning against the doorframe.

“Go get settled, I’ll be out in a minute.”

She gives Don a kiss on the cheek and hugs him goodbye before taking the keys and heading out of the office.

I make sure the shop's front door is closed before pushing off the frame and walking over to Don’s — well, Riley’s — desk.

“Did ya get it?”

“Boy, when have ya ever known me not to follow through on my word?” He reaches inside his coat pocket, peaking towards the door to make sure it’s still just the two of us. When he’s sure the coast is clear, he produces a small black velvet box.

“Guess I won’t be callin’ her Miss McKenzie for much longer.”

“Not if things go my way.”

He hands me the box and I open it to take one more look at the ring. It was my mama’s. I dropped it off at a jeweler to be resized and I asked Don to pick it up for me so Riley wouldn’t accidentally find it. My parents were dirt fucking poor when they got married and my mama insisted that one simple wedding band was enough. My dad always regretted not being able to get her a flashy engagement ring so he gave her one when they renewed their vows on their thirtieth anniversary. She told me once that when the right woman came, she wanted me to have it. Said a ring like that deserved to witness a love story from the beginning.

“You don’t need any sorta luck, Sy. That woman is head over heels in love with you.”

I snap the box shut and shove it in the side pocket of my shorts. My hands are fucking sweating just thinking about dinner tomorrow night. It’s our two year anniversary tomorrow which is how I convinced Riley to go to the cabin with me. She’s cooking up something fancy although I don’t know what since she wanted it to be a surprise. Little does she know, I’ve got a life-changing surprise of my own.

“Were ya nervous when ya proposed to Charlotte?”

“Every man gets nervous, Son. But you wouldn’t be askin’ if ya actually thought she’d say no. When it’s right, it’s right.”

It’s definitely right, so fucking right. Riley is the best thing that ever happened to me and I don’t ever want to be without her. I know she feels it too.

So much has happened since I first met her. So much has changed. Riley took over managing this place for Don while also doing some freelance consultant work. She’s not that reserved, timid girl I met that first day. She’s still herself, just a more self-assured and confident version of herself.

“I should go. If I stay much longer, Riley will start wonderin’ what we’re talkin’ about.”

Don drops into the office chair, running his hands over the leather of the arms rests like he’s getting reacquainted with the feeling.

“Make sure you get a picture for Charlotte. She’ll have your hide if ya don’t.”

That makes me laugh because I know it’s a hundred percent true. She takes her responsibilities as godmother very seriously and she is absolutely in love with Riley. She loves to tell Riley all the town gossip when we go over there for Sunday dinner.

“I’ll be sure to do that.” I readjust my cap on my head as I head for the door. “Call if ya need anything.”

“Ya don’t mean that,” Don scoffs.

“Damn right I don’t,” I call over my shoulder with a smirk.

“Drive safe, Son.”

36 months later

Riley

I’m almost done packing up the last of my newspaper wrapped mugs into a box for the move next week. It’s so strange to see the apartment so empty, even if that means it’s currently filled with boxes instead.

“Hey, Ri?” Sy calls out from the bedroom.

“In the kitchen!”

Sy walks into view with a familiar blue gift-wrapped box in his hands.

“Oh… That was supposed to be for your birthday in May,” I explain quickly. I thought I’d have a few more weeks to figure out how I was going to bring this up. If my words failed then he was supposed to just open the gift and know what I had to say.

“Well, I haven’t opened it yet.” He extends the box for me to take back.

This is my out. I could take back the gift, shove it in one of the boxes and forget about it again until I gather the courage to do this all over again or I could just let this happen.

“You know what, it’s fine.” I place the box of mugs on the ground by the door and turn my full attention to Sy. “Open it now.”

Sy frowns at me, tipping his head to the side. “You don’t look sure.”

“No,” I take a deep breath, letting it out slowly, “go ahead.”

Sy knows something is up, looking between me and the small box in his hands. He turns it over, looking at it from all sides.

I can imagine what’s going on in his head. How he’s probably analyzing the way the contents rattle as he drops onto the couch. How the box feels really light compared to what you would expect for the size.

I’m a lot more nervous than I thought I would be. That’s part of the reason I was waiting until his birthday to bring this up. I figured the added pressure of it being his birthday would be the final push I needed to broach the subject.

I sit on the coffee table across from Sy, rubbing my hands over my thighs. Am I sweating? Is it hot in here?

Sy picks up on my nerves — obviously — and he takes my hand in his. I look down at where his thumb rubs over the back of my fingers, lightly brushing my wedding ring.

“Ri, what’s going on? You’re worrying me, here.”

I can’t help but feel so incredibly fond of him right now. This. This right here is why I married him. Just like that, my worries are abated.

“Just,” I sigh, smiling, “open it.”

I watch as Sy peels back the tape torturously slowly and lifts one side of the paper. As I expected, Sy doesn’t immediately recognize the box. He frowns as he reads the packaging but then his mouth drops open when he finally understands his gift. Or rather, when he finally understands the meaning behind his gift.

“Are ya serious about this?” He holds up the box of ovulation test strips, trying to mask the hopeful expression on his face. We’ve talked about this, of course. It’s typically good practice to make sure you and your partner agree on whether or not to have children before you marry them but we’d always just talked about doing so at some point in the future.

I knew this was something Sy really wanted but as with everything else, he’s just patiently waited for me to be ready too. The house we just bought has plenty of room to accommodate a growing family. And the new puppy Sy promised we could get soon.

I bite my lip but it doesn’t help contain my smile. “I’ve already checked with my doctor. I can go off my pill whenever we want to start trying.”

Sy looks back down at the box on his lap and is unnervingly quiet for a moment before he throws it to the other side of the couch and pulls me to straddle his lap.

“Sy!” I squeal, taken by surprise. I don’t have time to process what just happened before my shirt is ripped over my head and Sy attaches his lips to my neck.

“You haven’t started the new pack after the sugar pills right?” His hand dips under the band of my leggings and his fingers dig into the flesh of my ass. “You were supposed to start it tomorrow?”

My eyes fall closed and I bare my neck to give him better access. “How do you…”

“I take notice to my wife’s health, sue me.”

My bra comes off next and then I’m lifted into the air.

“You gonna fuck me, Captain? You gonna knock me up?”

All I get is a growl in response and he sits me on the edge of the dining room table. I lean back on my forearms and lift my hips to allow my pants to come off and Sy pushes his jeans down just enough to free his already impossibly hard erection.

“Fuck yeah, I’m gonna fill ya up and keep ya filled ‘til you’re good and pregnant.”

“Do your worst, Cap,” I taunt as he pushes in, spearing me with his dick.

I guess I had no reason to be nervous after all.

47 months later

“You’re doin’ so good, sweetheart, you gotta keep goin’.”

Riley looks absolutely exhausted. She has deep circles under her eyes since she hasn’t slept in almost 36 hours and she’s panting like she just ran a marathon. The last hour has indeed been a grueling test of her strength but she’s so so close. On top of all that, if the way she’s crushing my hand is any indication, she is in excruciating pain.

“I can’t, Sy. I’m sorry, I can’t do it, I can’t...” She collapses back on the bed. The hand that was clasping the side rail covers her mouth as she sobs and I wish so badly that I could fix this for her but, unfortunately, that’s not possible.

I look towards the doctor at the foot of the bed and hold up one finger as a silent request to let me try something before she intervenes. We’ve talked about the possibility of a C-section and I don’t want that for Riley if we can avoid it. Recovering from surgery is difficult enough without being almost a thousand miles away from home. There’s no way Riley would handle the ride home just a few days post op. We already have to make the drive with a newborn in the backseat of the truck. At least I had the sense to put the baby seat in to be ready for when Riley made it to her due date.

“Darlin’, look at me.”

Riley’s eyes are shut tightly as she shakes her head. Fat tears fall down her cheek and I wipe them away with my thumb.

“Ri, sweetheart, look at me.”

She sniffs as she opens her bloodshot eyes, her chin quivering as she tries to regain her composure.

“Just you and me.” That’s not quite true, there’s the doctor and a handful of nurses in here with us but she understands what I mean all the same.

She releases a shaky breath. “I’m really glad it’s you, Sy,” she answers, leaning into my touch. I press a kiss to her forehead, smoothing away a few strands of sweat soaked hair before helping Riley as she pushes herself back into a seated position. Well, as seated as she can manage with her legs spread wide and her remarkably large stomach.

When it’s time to push again, Riley follows the doc’s gentle encouragement and she bares down, managing to get through the next fifty seconds like a pro. I wish I could say it only takes a few more contractions to get the job done but it’s another half hour before a sharp wail fills the little room.

Riley falls back onto the bed, rapidly heaving air into her lungs as she attempts to catch her breath. I’m vaguely aware of the medical staff speaking to us but I can’t hear them over the pounding in my ears. I’m transfixed as the tiny human is gently deposited on the towel over Riley’s stomach.

My amazing wife reaches down to trail a finger over our baby’s forehead, barely daring to touch at first before cradling them against her. We’re both quiet as we admire our child, only looking away when I’m handed a pair of scissors and told where to cut.

It’s a lot harder than I would have imagined it would be, taking me two or three snips to fully get through the thick cord. As soon as I’m done, I go back to the head of the bed and all but collapse over Riley’s chest. She presses her face into my neck and her arms wrap weakly around me.

“You did it, Ri. I love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

“Okay, Dad, are you ready to hold your baby boy?”

I turn to see one of the nurses holding my son who they’ve cleaned off and wrapped up in a bundle of blankets. I’m aware that he’s not actually that small for a newborn but he looks so fucking breakable.

I hold my arms out and the nurse places him against my chest, making sure I’ve got a good hold on him before stepping back and giveng me a Riley a bit of privacy.

“Hey, bud. Let’s say hi to your Mama.”

Riley’s crying again but I know that they are happy tears. “Hi baby,” she coos, using all her remaining strength to lean forward and kiss his forehead. “I want you to know you have the best Daddy in the world.”

“Na,” I argue, “your Mama is the best. She made sure you were nice and warm and safe before you came out to meet us.”

We could argue back and forth like this all day, both of us pressed close together with our son between us. I count my blessings because I am one lucky son of a gun to have the most breathtakingly beautiful and phenomenal woman to share this moment — and my life — with.

It’s fitting, really. From the moment I met her, something about Riley had me hooked. And now with our son? Well, I can’t tear my eyes away so what does that tell you?

Bonus Scene

#captain syverson #captain syverson fic #captain syverson fanfic #captain syverson fanfiction #captain syverson fluff #cpt syverson #cpt syverson fic #cpt syverson fanfic #cpt syverson fanfiction #henry cavill #captainsyverson

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eleanor-bradstreet · 5 months

Text

20 Questions for Fic Writers!

Thank you for the tags @suspendingtime, @colettebronte and @fayes-fics 💙 Following Faye's lead and answering while inebriated 😅 Saturday night fam...

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

24 thus far. I should toss LMBYA on there - I think it may be well received.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

144,232

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just Bridgerton. It's the only thing that has stirred my soul to write for since I was a teenager...

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

On AO3:

Love to Spare 135

Young at Heart 128

Touch 126

A Brother's Love 122

Willow Bark 98

Tumblr notes:

Still Going 1730

Touch (my next top 5 are the Touch series at 3777 cumulatively)

Locked Out 417

Gala 395

Young At Heart 300

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Absolutely. Every single comment gets a response because that level of engagement from readers deserves celebration and recognition. It makes my heart soar.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

LOL HAVE YOU MET ME? I have something of a reputation... But if I had to pick, I'd say Number Ten and I'll Be Seeing You rank as my top angstiest endings for A & B Bridgerton respectively.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hmmm. Young At Heart was for sure the fluffiest thing I've ever written. But I have a soft spot for the tooth-rotting sweetness of Two Lines and A Special Day.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Fortunately no. I haven't encountered any negativity for my fics yet. The Bridgerton fan community has been lovely.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do, but I don't feel that it's my strong suit. It started just for Benophie but I have branched into x Reader. I don't think I'm great at it. I prefer to write whump and angst.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

No, no real crossovers. I enjoy AUs that dip into vampire/zombie/apocalypse territory though. My friend suggested I combine my fixations and have the Bridgertons discover a portal to Middle Earth in their hedgerow 😅 Let the madness begin...

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I think so. I granted permission for a fic to be translated into French.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not officially, but I have had such fun brainstorming and workshopping fic ideas with my mutuals. I wouldn't have written half as much as I have if it weren't for them.💙

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

Benophie is my OTP, obvi.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

WOOF. I have 17 WIPs. I'd say the most at risk is a concept for Anthony on each of his siblings' wedding days. I have to read all the Bridgerton novels to finish this one, and that's a tall ask.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm aight at conveying emotion. Feels are kinda my game - good and bad.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Writing TOO much about feelings 😜 I skew verbose and can get wordy as fuck because I'm trying so hard to paint a very precise picture. I always have to remind myself to reel it in so readers aren't bogged down.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I have sprinkled some French for Benophie and Tamil for Kanthony into my stories. Just little phrases that I always research thoroughly.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

First ever? X-Men 😋 I was 12. The first film came out. I was a goner for Wolverine...

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Guh, they are all like children to me. But my heart is drawn to my multichapter character stories. Let Me Be Your Anchor is the first Bridgerton fic I started writing and the only one I ever intended to. It's novel length and will be my greatest accomplishment. A Brother's Love was the first fic I actually finished and has the most soul in it IMO. Then I see Willow Bark as my most clever 'fix it' story - if the show could adopt my ideas on that one I think we'd all win 😉

Everyone I know has already been tagged so - just here to share 💙

#tag game #writer questions #love these qs

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halfelven · 11 months

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love random not even logged in readers just dropping their 'constructive criticism' on your 100k+ story that you're putting online entirely for free. this is just a rant btw

"You obviously have a great talent and I think you should work on honing it some. As much as I’ve enjoyed the story, there are a few things that stand out that you might consider looking at. I feel like the story isn’t sure what it wants to be at times; is it character driven or plot driven? It doesn’t flow smoothly because sometimes we have these wonderful character vignettes, like Illumi and Kalluto on a road trip or Kite/Leorio/Gon/Killua in an apartment where plot doesn’t really feel important, followed by what feels like heavily plot driven beats, like Kalluto and the spiders. In addition, it contributes to confusion because sometimes we see established characterization turned on its head. Especially the weird way everyone all of a sudden just sort of was OK with Kalluto being a spider and then working with Illumi when they just went to all that trouble to escape him? It all kind of feels forced and not natural. You know?

Anyway, I’ll definitely keep reading and look forward to seeing what happens."

first: love you trying to sound legitimate with your "in addition" like this is some kind of writer's workshop. second: in what way would I, the writer, think that an incomplete part of my story in which the reader does not yet know most of the main motivations (they are only hinted at so far) feels forced and not natural when I know what's happening, where it is going (and where I haven't had other readers comment with confusion about that part)

and moving on. don't do this. also like i said this is a wip in and no, no one is cool with Kalluto being a spider and no they're not cool working with Illumi, really. it was already established that some of them /have/ been working with Illumi before this~ he's someone that they know. like have you never been in a seriously dangerous situation that you just have to get through before you get back to what you want?*** also at this point Chrollo's real motive hasn't been entirely revealed.

Killua keeps changing his mind about what he's doing because he's a scared kid whose self-hatred is destroying him from the inside out. the POV is so tight that I have to keep dropping reminders that what is stated in the narrative is often not true! Illumi's POV, for example, keeps showing Killua as really loving him and being happy he's around but struggling with a desire for freedom, while with Killua's POV he's terrified of Illumi most of the time. like how is that not obviously a distorted POV where you can't trust the narrator?

"where plot doesn’t really feel important, followed by what feels like heavily plot driven beats"

this part is especially irritating because it's like yeah that's how I want to write it? this isn't a published novel. I don't have to commit to making sure every scene is important to the plot. I can spend time writing a full scene about someone drinking a glass of water and then 13 chapters in a row that are for moving the plot forward. I didn't even tag it as a novel... I did tag it for unreliable narration and I keep getting annoyed that people keep ignoring that.

"I feel like the story isn’t sure what it wants to be at times; is it character driven or plot driven?"

it's both??? it's neither??? it's a fanfic??? why do I keep getting comments lately where people are expecting me to adhere to like fucking publishing standards. this keeps up and I will write a chapter which is entirely about a minor character drinking a glass of water. watch me. I'll write one about phinks drinking a glass of water and you'll like it*

"Overall, the story is good and presented a compelling alternative to CA. Look, each fan has their own opinion on CA and I know I didn’t like it. I think it was a product of what Togashi was going through as he began to experience health issues and then finding himself right back where he said he wasn’t going to be mentally after he ended his earlier manga. We can never know for sure, but it certainly had a “watch it all burn vibe” to it near the end. I honestly believe he wanted it to end with the finality of Gon’s suicide as a capstone statement, but was probably convinced to go a different route, which kinda of left a jarring feel in the narrative and culminated in a rather unsatisfying end to Gon and Killua’s journey. Despite that, I am very reluctant to read fics where the events of CA are erased or grossly modified and honestly yours is really the first long AU/alternate timeline I’ve enjoyed"

okay first of all, I love the CA arc. but I had to split a point off where Kite was going to survive. why do you have to leave this whole paragraph about how you think Togashi was or wasn't going to go with the CA on my fanfic? I didn't even write this as 'oh look at my alternative to CA bc I hated CA' I don't really look forward to hearing comments about how random people didn't like so and so aspect of the story that I'm basing my story off of. I've never written fanfic for a story that I didn't like (except for some things that I don't have published I wrote at a request for friends for a fandom they were into that I wasn't really) and yeah I've wanted to 'fix' aspects (like tolkien's treatment of women for example) but I am not looking for your 'this is what I hated about the source material' comments on my stories

tired of getting comments with little 'oh I didn't like your style at first but now I do' or 'here's how to fix your story!' unsolicited advice from people who aren't better writers than me (I don't even want it from people who would be better writers than me on stuff I'm just doing for fun and for free)

when did stuff like this become normal? at least don't be a coward and be not logged in so you can't even get a response notification. like girl they aren't cool with it! why do you think everyone is on guard standing around like they're in a fucking hostage situation? how do you see such wildly different interpretations from different character's POVs and think it's not intentional? what part about Kite watching Killua like a fucking hawk makes you think he's going to let Illumi take him after this?

like if you've never had to smile and pretend to be cool with your abuser (pretend to love them) or someone who was threatening you to keep someone else safe then good for you! it fucking sucks! also don't know how to explain to you what a child who is growing up in an extremely isolated abusive situation goes through (though I keep writing about it in this story you should catch on...) but it's a million back and forths with emotion and feelings--especially if their abuser does (to in some way or to some degree) love them. and it is often blaming themselves. I'm not letting my years of studying human psychology and child development go to waste here**

is this story perfect? no but I'm not gonna hire an editor for a fanfic. and everyone's interpretations of characters will be different. especially with child characters who are going through huge changes in the world around them and their personal lives. part of the appeal of fanfiction is 'who would they become if this happened instead?' *sorry I keep writing about starving and not having clean drinking water but I will never stop because that's what I grew up with and it's hell. also phinks drinking water would be compelling since I assume he'd have harder access to clean drinking water

**hunter x hunter is also one of the only stories I have encountered with characters who have backgrounds as fucked up as mine and Togashi's interest in human psychology really stands out.

***like good for you but that was most of my life and you sometimes just have to shut up and get through it. and no I will not put my notes in the right order bc I'm not being paid enough****

****I'm being paid nothing

#sorry i got one too many comments that irritated me #feel free to chime in if you're getting comments like this too #it's been really getting on my nerves lately #and making me not want to post anything #you're not my teacher or editor #and i don't use a beta reader bc i'd never post anything #if i had to think of it as work and not just for me #i already do writing for work where i have to really consider the reader #i also didn't like one commenter pointing out typos #i'll catch them at some point #they were like great chapter! here's all the mistakes i saw #so download the story and fix them yourself if they bother you so much you have to run through and do line edits #if you don't want typos i'd have to wait two to three months so the story looked fresh #to catch them before posting and i'm not doing that #you can think this sounds bitchy but writing is hours and hours of work #i could jot down five sentences just for myself and have a story for years just remembering what i was thinking when i wrote those #you want a perfectly edited story? then go read a professionally published book #oh i guess that's not good enough for you either #okay now i am being bitchy but in my defense #i'm not forcing them to read it

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quietlywatchingwritingreading · 1 year

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So i made a little poll about what sort of fanfic I should write over here.

So this is the short little oneshot of Espresso and Madeleine spending some time together.

Fanfic was looked over by @robocatfan, for typos and other small mistakes. Content warning: No major ones, but there is a discussion of Animal Testing being a thing. I prefer to try and warn of any triggers. If anyone wants me to add any triggers I've forgotten/not realized, let me know and i'll edit this post, or add additional tags.

Also this is a really long post.

Madeleine couldn’t help but admire the sunrise whenever he returned from his travels. It was as if the Divines themselves were welcoming him home after a long and cold night. A fleeting moment of peace and relaxation before he would once again return to protecting the kingdom and its inhabitants.

It wasn’t time to relax. Right now, he needed to find Espresso. It had been several days since he had last seen his friend, even in passing, and he was starting to get worried.

Not that the Professor was in any sort of danger. Madeleine had made it a point of pride to protect this kingdom! Therefore there were almost no roaming thieves or vicious beasts to threaten him, or any other cookie!

Still, the professor was known for locking himself away for days on end. He could spend just as long at his friends' workshops, or at the libraries. Never mind his long sleepless nights researching any number of topics, or the long sleepless nights traveling to the Wafflebot Workshop or Parfedia Institute.

Fortunately, the knight knew exactly where he might find him.

It was still not quite dawn when he arrived at the park. It was nestled neatly between the residential homes and the market, making it the perfect place for gatherings and picnics. Even now, the aroma of fine coffee hung in the air.

Espresso was sitting at a small table, waiting for his pour over coffee to brew.

“Espresso cookie!” Madeleine boomed. “How are you faring today, my friend.”

Espresso shuddered, before he let out a long, defeated sigh. “Hello, Madeleine. I wasn’t expecting to see you this soon. Or early.”

“Oh? Well, of course I’m up early! I’m the knight commander, and there are always cookies that need to admire my glorious armor at all hours of the day!”

“Right. Coffee, then?” Espresso pushed a glass to an empty seat. “There's some milk in the basket over there.”

“Ah, thank yo-wait. Espresso , you never drink milk. Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I don’t. But I had a feeling that I'd have a guest this morning. Most cookies can’t handle a truely bitter coffee.”

“Huh? Oh, were you expecting me, then? That’s quite an honor! I’ll be fine, bitter or sweet“ Madeleine couldn’t help but laugh. Espresso just looked, frustrated.

“Well, Espresso? Did you need my help with anything?”

“I’m quite fine, Madeleine. I don’t see why you worry about me so much.”

“I-How could I not?! You spend days working without rest! Wonderful work, that helps so many others! But the cost to your health and happiness–”

“Madeleine-”

“I’m serious! How can you be happy working yourself to the crumb!?”

“My results speak for themselves. Do you think I would get favorable results if I spent my day lazing about?”

“That didn’t answer my question, As long as you’re happy, Espresso, then that’s all that matters. I'm glad to see you take a moment of your day to enjoy the light! There's so much to enjoy outside of that stuffy laboratory!”

Espresso sighed. He couldn’t understand. Madeleine wasn’t the first cookie to show concern for his work habits, but he was by far the most consistent. Every other cookie was perfectly willing to accept his answers and excuses, but Madelene always went back for him.

More than once, that knight had managed to herd him into some sort of celebration or picnic. More than once, that knight had managed to catch onto his frustrations and problems before he’d even said a word. More than once, that knight had tried to cheer him up or distract him from his failures.

He couldn’t let him know how much he appreciated that.

Still, he had a feeling that the knight already knew. Or, he wanted to think Madeleine knew.

“Did you have a bad time in your science classes? Or did the Creme Knights not teach such classes? You seem to have a certain distaste for laboratories.”

“Oh? Oh! Of course, the Creme Knights taught a wide range of classes, from fine dining to first aid! Though I must admit, it wasn’t my favorite subject. I always got distracted, and forgot the exact measurements of the experiments. Still, it wasn’t my worst subject, even if it is related to my greatest childhood failures. “

“Oh?” There was a glint of interest in Espresso’s eyes. “You? You did something bad? Care to share, or is this a secret you keep to your grave.”

“To my Grave!” Madeleine yelled. His blue eyes quickly darted around the park. Once he was certain they were alone, he leaned closer. “It was nothing that bad. I and some other Paladin Students felt bad for the Sugar Mice that were to be used in some of the experiments. And well, we broke into the school and released them.”

“Awww. That happens more times than you would think. I believe most schools have banned that practice-”

“-Into House Custard.”

“Hek–” Espresso started choking on his coffee.

“I think they’re still dealing with those poor mice, and their great great grandchildren!! Ah-I know now that this was a terrible way to handle the problem. All I can do is try and learn from my mistakes. “

Espresso was struggling to breathe, holding his chest. “You just-did you -how did you?! Did you throw them over the fence?!”

“Espresso for your safety and mine, we should not discuss this further!”

“Hard to imagine that the star pupil of the Creme Knights would have a rebellious side. “

“Espresso. I’m certain you must have a story or two as well!”

“The Parfaedia Institute absolutely does not partake in anything quite as oh I can’t even try to keep a poker face!” Espresso was smiling. “There’s always something. Do you know how many wizards are planning to try and prank Almond Cookie? 647 of them! I’m the one in charge of flooding his office with Balloons!”

“Huh? That seems petty-”

“Petty? Of course. Safety is important, and I’ve nothing but respect for his work. However, trying to cage curiosity must always be rebelled against! Especially in petty, harmless ways.”

“Still, that’s unlike you, Espresso!”

“I owed Latte a favor. Still, I’ve not done anything too noteworthy outside of my discoveries and reports. As a student I did help with an experiment to try and revive a prehistoric creature.”

“I see. So Scorvilla is the only reasonable school to send my future children to, understood.”

“Madeleine!” espresso was laughing so hard, he had to place his coffee down. “Its not-its not that–”

“If I have a child who desires to become a mage, I'm sending them to Scorvilla. That is clearly the best choice for them.”

“I would have assumed any of your children would follow the family tradition of becoming a paladin?”

“Of course I would love that! But they need to be their own cookies, and they have to choose their own paths in life. If they want to be politicians, mages, or stonemasons, then that’s their decision!”

“Hmm. I can’t say I disagree with you.” Espresso sighed. “I should probably get back to the lab. Unless you wanted to become a test subject for the magic candy-”

“That sounds boring! I think I'll stick with patrolling the kingdom and shaking hands with the locals!-”

“Did you want to join me in flooding a detective’s room with an obnoxiously large number of balloons?”

“That also sounds fun! -this isn’t going to disrupt his work, is it?”

“My magic will be able to clean his office up in seconds. I might need you to bail me out of jail though-”

Madeleine laughed. “Oh, of course! I’d never let you end up in such a dreadful place! You’ve done nothing to deserve such a fate! ”

Espresso smiled. Madeleine was far more reliable then he wanted to admit. “Thank you! Ah-and perhaps there’s something you’d like to do? I don’t believe you’ve visited the Magic Institute before?” Perhaps, for one of these meetings, he could lead the day’s events. Of course, he was under no illusions. Madeleine would eventually take the lead. This, along with his endless confidence, no longer bothered him nearly as much as it had. It was just part of his many charms.

#cookie run #espresseleine #espresso cookie #madeleine cookie #my writing #longpost #cookie run fanfic

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writingonjorvik · 2 years

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Riders of Jorvik

So I realize I've not been terribly active on here lately, but as I was tagged in the recent SSOblr D&D post and I noticed in the tags someone mentioning ROJ, I figured I'd make a post real quick filling in about ROJ. There will be a reblog very shortly of this post with a list of relevant links to ROJ so it doesn't die in the tags.

For those of you who don't know, I've been working on a project called Riders of Jorvik. You may have seen some of the Circle sigils and faction symbols I've made for this project on here already. Riders of Jorvik (ROJ) is a TTRPG inspired by SSO. The shorthand is to say that it's D&D for SSO, though more technical in TTRPGs ROJ is its own system. It would be like saying that D&D and ROJ are both board games, but they both have their own rules, one isn't an expansion for the other. That said, my aim is also to make ROJ easier to pick up than D&D, and I'm getting very close to rereleasing the guidebook with its 1.1 update with a lot of feedback from the community, which will likely coincide with some limited physical editions in giveaways.

I've been mostly active on Insta as I've been working on ROJ for almost two years now, and while I appreciate all the support the SSOblr community has shown WOJ and my projects in the past, my work with JC proved something I already knew, that the Insta community is the largest of SSO's communities at the moment that doesn't require recording, and I wanted to get ROJ in front of as many people as I could to find playtesters. That said, I have promoted the ROJ Discord in the past here and would recommend it again if you have any interest in playing ROJ, news about ROJ, or TTRPGs in general.

I have, before ROJ, run SSO in D&D before on an old podcast that is now deleted. That said, I still have all the resources for it and if there is anyone with an interest in the supplements I built to get that setting to work, they're available on the Discord, or you can DM me for the link. All of the ROJ files are available for public download on the ROJ website as well if you want to pick it up, but don't want to join the Discord. Even though it's not done, I would recommend the 1.1 beta file for the added TTRPG glossary and resources, particularly for new players picking up the hobby. I'm also happy to help beginners pick up their first games on the server and learn the ropes, of ROJ or D&D.

If you're interested in playing ROJ but don't have a current table, I run open games on the ROJ Discord. You don't need any play experience with any TTRPG to join, please just bring a completed character sheet. And if you don't know how to do that, on alternating weeks to my one shots, I hold open character creation workshops on call and am always available on the server to answer questions. The next one of these workshops is this Sunday actually (Sept 11 at 4pm EST)! These one shots will be going on hiatus soon so I can finish 1.1 for release, so please come join while I'm running them.

If y'all have any other questions, my asks are open, anon should be on, and y'all can poke me on that Discord. Like I said, I'll be reblogging this shortly with links.

#ridersofjorvik #riders of jorvik #sso #star stable #star stable online #starstableonline #starstable #ssoblr #woj dnd #woj writing #woj ttrpg

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finniestoncrane · 1 year

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Hi hi Finnie!! Congrats on reaching 1k! I've been going back n forth if i should request this because,,, nervessss, but can I pleasse request no.9 ever fallen in love with someone?

I'm 5'3, have blonde buzzed hair and a curvy, chubby body. I'm afab genderfluid & bi so i joke my gender and sexuality is just everything/everything XD

I LOOOVE making really bad jokes, like dad jokes, puns, dirty jokes, and some of my favourite jokes dont have spoken punchlines so i stare at people with a goofy face until they get it :D I love listening to other people rant about their passions and learning new things, even if i dont fully get it, and enjoy being able to do the same back.

I'm very creative so most of my hobbies are with my hands, from drawing, to sewing, resin and woodwork, i like to try a bit of everything. I really enjoy seeing a finished product that i made on my own! I also like reading and playing dnd so I'm really good at crafting strategies or creative ways around problems in the game (and describing how i get to defeat my enemies, because im squeamish with real blood, but i love some good ol fictional gore.)

I'm very outgoing and bubbly, and i dislike being formal with people. I'd much rather be my casual and crude self, and skip any awkwardness. I am naturally very loud so i can have some issues around quieter people but i try my best to adjust so I'm not cutting them off. I also have a very dirty mind and am a very physically affectionate person, I'm always flirting with, hugging someone, linking arms, or holding hands, whether were platonic or romantic!

Asfghgjfla thank you for letting me ramble and for doing all of these for us!!

🎀 No.9: Ever Fallen In Love With Someone 🎀

tell me a little bit about yourself and i'll give you a rogue pairing a/n: ok i am bestowing upon you what i consider to be the greatest gift because truly you just suit him so well 💚 1k milestone info! 🔞minors dni🔞 • kofi • tag: finnie1k

ok this is my own headcanon but it's practically legit canon in my mind by this point, but thick bodies are his favourite type of body so checkmark there

also, exceptional gender and sexuality choice. i feel like yeah he's a cis bisexual boy, but also i don't think he cares enough to put any sort of label on it, and he has more important things to be concerned about, so he'll identify as whatever the fuck makes you leave him alone and stop questioning him quickest

look i'm not pulling out my files on his dialogue in the games, but trust me when i say that this is the dorkiest dweeb in the universe and his ability to make the dumbest jokes and be so satisfied with himself knows no bounds

good about the listening thing, because you won't be allowed to get a word in edgeways. and besides, he's the best, so he deserves everyone's attention at all times while he talks about whatever the hell he pleases (but he might also let you tell him about something you love if he's too tired to talk)

yeah, stinky boy is down there in his little workshop using his little raccoon paws to get up to all sorts of nonsense so he'd be super pleased to have someone with some capabilities in that kind of area to help him with some projects

and being able to be strategic and creative with problem solving? sounds like someone just got promoted to riddler apprentice and chief "evil plan" coordinator

outgoing and bubbly are probably going to grate on him but god knows he needs someone to be the face of his operation, and it'd be good for him to have a brightness in his life

also it's fine to be loud because you need to be able to cut through either the sound of his welding or yelling or ranting

and truly very much so he needs physical attention and affection, which i'm sure he'd warm to eventually if you just keep at it. relentlessly, even if he's pretending to hate it and it's making him grumpy

#finnie writes #finnie1k

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astralyavie · 9 months

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I'll Burn My Eyes Out, Before I Get Out

Tagging: Yavie with mentions of @hayliel

Location: Sky Home, Akadi Realm

Timeframe: Night before the troupe departs for the Astral Sea

Notes: Yavie receives a compass from the soratami

Content Warning: Implied Depression

From the alcove where the fall eladrin had perched, he could see the entirety of Sky Home stretched out in front of him. Yavie found himself waiting, taking time to wonder when the twinkling lights of the soratami’s efforts would retire for the evening. Some blinked away while others took their place, tireless efforts of toiling - from here he could hear small bursts of laughter alongside the rumble of a language that Yavie didn’t quite understand. He hummed a tune and found it carried away with the wind, swept up in power that the fall fey didn’t quite understand.

Hayliel would love this, Yavie thought. Theneras would have too. It was rare that the eladrin stumbled upon something new, that was a large part of why he’d come on this expedition - nobody had asked him, but Yavie had come to expect that. He’d found Aurora a blade and helped recover a relic, had tried to barter secrets for Aegnor’s virtue but still it felt obvious that at least some of the troupe would have preferred that Yavie had stayed home. There was so much here and so much potential, truthfully the fey couldn’t help but wonder if it would be better if he just asked the soratami if he could stay. All about him was magic, the city, the air itself. There was a song in every breath and every speck of gilding. Sympathetic automation as tools and resources reacted to the needs of the soratami, Yavie spied through the open air to their workshops and saw how magic itself seemed responsive to them. Endless pursuits of knowledge completely uninhibited.

Staying meant he’d miss out on whatever came next though, and most importantly it meant not going home. There was the thought, errant as it was that he could easily choose one above the other - in truth, Yavie only had one reason to return to the mortal realm. He didn’t care about the fighting with the drow and he didn’t care about the conflict with the Asphodel. Mortals were fleeting and boring, cumbersome with their easily wounded egos - but none were more tiresome than these creatures that called themselves Gods. It was all so… Small. Trivial, even. As brilliant as Severon was he was millennia behind these Moonfolk and he could not teach the fall eladrin nearly as much. Hayliel remained Yavie’s singular reason for wanting to go home, which was more than enough for him.

“Why are you sad, child?” Telepathy spilled into Yavie’s mind as one of the Soratami floated from an alcove above.

“I’m never sad.” Yavie corrected.

“You’re always sad.” That didn’t feel true and fey couldn’t speak any lies… But Yavie supposed he had gotten very good at lying to himself.

“Your home is beautiful,” Yavie remarked, “Perfect.”

“We detest that word: perfection. Nothing is ever truly perfect, the moment perfection is achieved then there is nowhere to go. We look beyond, we strive for greater and greater.” Their hand touched the eladrin’s cheek and he couldn’t help but smile - though it failed to reach his eyes; Yavie supposed there was some truth to what they were saying. “You don’t strive for perfection, you strive for improvement: that’s your gift, my rotten one.”

“Why do you call me that?” It felt like an insult and while the fey was rarely slighted, he couldn’t help but think that they were mocking the magic he had cultivated within his court.

“Fallen fruit rots into the earth, returns to the soil, and feeds the stars: to rot is to be reborn.” He fell uncharacteristically quiet at that, people were rarely very good at making him feel better. Hayliel and him were good at distractions: songs and dancing, but laughter always ended eventually. Everyone else went on about responsibility, told him who he was, what he was born to, or what he should or shouldn’t do. Yavie had come to resent it - as if being himself was either too much or not enough for the people around him.

“I love it here.” Yavie admitted after a long pause where the soratami lingered in his space, “But still, I’m homesick.”

“Home is never a place, just a feeling.” They lifted their palm as air and starlight swirled with hidden notes and responsive song, it solidified and darkened in hue as a green compass was produced in the soratami’s palm. The moonfolk extended it towards Yavie, a gift. “To take with you on your journey home.”

The soratami shifted into the light and disappeared into some of the long shadows cast by the gilded structure, their mane and robes flowing with the still wind as they fluttered from Yavie’s field of vision. The green compass in his hand, Yavie stared at the device with some wonder as he considered its use. Open air of Akari was directionless and there was nothing etched into the compass’ surface - just an arrow that fixed itself towards the sky. He wondered if it would lead him home, or if it would lead him towards some other adventure… If this was some test of temptation, or a boon given to him by the soratami. Yavie was inherently curious, so his decision was already made as he thought fondly of Hayliel and all the stories the fey would have for him when they were together again.

To the distant hum of twinkling lights and magic, Yavie let his eyes drift closed - quarters abandoned as he slept perched on the ledge, head tilted against the alcove wall with the open air around him. Tomorrow would bring even more adventure.

#mirror #musing #selfpara

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