Tumgik
#i saw it in fucking KMART and was like
nanobawn · 5 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
{{ ☆ Sorry but I am absolutely losing it at all of the rabbit merch you find in William's office, the movie crew really took his thing for rabbits and fled with it and I for one appreciate that so much—
Tumblr media
13 notes · View notes
notahorseindisguise · 8 months
Text
saw a really really tall and hot trans woman working at kmart. i told her "hey btw you look really pretty". later on i saw her again when i was checking out and she was like "are you just paying with card?" and i was so flustered she was talking to me again i just said "yes" and went to the self serve checkout. FUCK. i wanna be freidns with her
10 notes · View notes
ratherembarrassing · 1 year
Text
2023: WEEK 1
triangle of sadness (2022): nearly didn't go see this because i was deeply nervous about the vomiting scene, which turned out to be hilarious and only a little bit incredibly gross. a tremendous visceral movie about, amongst other things, how lacking in viscera society is at the moment.
the menu (2022): i watched this the day after triangle of sadness, and it was the perfect time to watch it. the impulse, i imagine, if you saw this some random day in your life, would probably be to extrapolate out a general commentary on rich people ruining everything. but it's so much better on a microscopic level, to think about it only and specifically in relation to the intersection of something so fundamental as food and something so abstract as art with a capital A and something so revolting as money.
wednesday (2022, netflix): the 1991 addams family movie and the 1964 addams family tv show are keystones to my existence, so i was somewhat skeptical about this because to be honest i hate tim burton. but i think everyone else involved in making this was likely tasked with tying him to a chair and telling him "no" a lot, because beyond the bounds of where you could feel his touch all over something, there was so much where you could feel his absence, which made the bits where he was allowed mostly better. i did not care for fred armisen's uncle fester.
just a minute (1967-, bbc radio): the answer to what did i do on my two 9-hour car journeys across australia was listen, non-stop, to every episode of just a minute on the bbc sounds app. now i'm making my way through random compilations of earlier series on youtube.
the lgbtqia themed rubik's cube that was going around on tumblr like 6 months ago that finally arrived this week in my mailbox: this thing is fucking hard to do. i can do a rubik's cube, but when you have to also hold the colour arrangements of every pride flag in your head as well, it's fucking hard.
a tiny pink plush cube with face like : 0 embroidered on it: thank you kmart.
23 notes · View notes
ofmermaidstories · 1 year
Note
Do you think yhe Terry face mask makes a difference? Also what are your current fave beauty products if you don't mind💞
I mean—your milage may vary, but when I woke up this morning my skin was a little plumper and more hydrated than usual (which is what I buy the masks for!) so, sure! BUT!!! It’s a pricey mask ($29 AUD), so I only buy them occasionally, for a little pampering (or to pregame an event!)! I really like sheet masks in general because they make a mundane routine (cleaning your face) more fun, but most of the time I buy Korean ones, which are way cheaper and just as (if not more!) effective! My skin concerns might be different to yours, but I buy masks to address one of several problems:
1. I’m having a breakout, and need my skin to calm the fuck down (teatree, generally, something that feels antiseptic)
2. I’m having a reaction, and need my skin to calm the fuck down (ingredients that will soothe it, cool down the redness!)
3. I’m tired and feel dry (so, something that feels nourishing or at least gives me an excuse to go lie down in a dark room and pretend I’m in a coffin for 15 minutes)
I don’t worry about anti-aging promises, or anything like that—sunscreen is the only thing I use that might even address that, and even then that’s less “anti-aging” and more “holy shit I don’t want the face doctor to dig cancer spots out of my face” LOL. As a whole I hate the whole, “omg you HAVE to prevent any visible signs of aging!!! don’t smile, don’t frown, don’t use your skin!!!” rhetoric that skincare and beauty in general markets itself off of. Fear mongering!!! A few lines and squiggles and saggy bits and pocks and divets make us interesting and human and idk—we’re lucky we get to age. 🥺
I use eye patches mostly for psychological reasons lmfao—like when I’ve been staring at a screen for too hard and too long. I have deep-set eye bags that aren’t going anywhere anytime soon, so I don’t bother with anything that claims much more than just “it’ll feel nice for a few minutes” lmaooo. The Patchology Rosé ones were a impulse buy, but they were fun!
After I saw your ask, though, I went and rummaged around in my drawers—I’m going to stay clear of anything too skincare-y, because YMMV, and I won’t include perfumes for the same reason, but after some thought, here’s my current faves:
Tumblr media
From left-to-right, top-to-bottom!
1. Jurlique Rose Moisture Plus Moisturising Cream Mask
2. Cancer Council Face Day Wear SPF50+ Serum (Sunscreen!)
3. Chantecaille Cheek Gelée Blush (I wear Vibrant! I’m also a big fan of their skincare range—I just repurchased the Hibiscus Smoothing Mask, it’s an exfoliator!)
4. Chanel Joues Contraste Powder Blush + Les Beiges Healthy Glow Foundation (I have Orchid Rose, in the blush, and the foundation is a light-to-medium coverage!)
5. Hourglass Veil Translucent Setting Powder
6. Shiseido ColourGel Lip Balm (the colour I have is Redwood! It’s orangey on me. Their eyeshadows are fun to play with and come in single pans, but I got into Shiseido because of their toner! I actually have a complimentary service at Mecca Cosmetica that I need to use—I normally just let them slide away bc I like doing my own makeup LOL, but the girl serving me in-store on Friday was like, “nooo, you should use it! We can play with the Shiseido stuff!” so I was like okeee LOL fml im so easily led it’s not funny 😭)
7. Tatcha The Silk Canvas Primer (it’s novel to play with lmaooo, but it does a decent job! I like how it smells! I originally wanted the ELF putty—but every Kmart I went to was sold out, and a friend was like, oh, that’s a dupe for the Tatcha one so I was like, oke, lmaooo)
8. Caudalíe Grape Water Face Mist (Caudalíe is fun and I love the scent, but be wary of overpaying for it lmfao. I think people see French brands and are like ooooo, so fancy, but it’s basically a pharmacy brand! A great one, don’t get me wrong, but if you’re buying it for like three times the price then just—don’t, LOL. I bought the Grape Water on impulse from Sephora, because I needed a new face spray—but tbh unless you’re like, in France for a bit and walk past a store or a Citypharma then there are other, more easily accessible brands!!! Saying that, I live by their hand cream—it smells like sherbet and it’s such a delight to put on!! i like to give myself lil hand massages when I use it and i’m almost out and im going to be DEVASTATED when it’s gone. 🥹)
I haven’t listed any eye-products because I’m trying to find a mascara that doesn’t try to murder me while driving by stinging my eyes and smearing everywhere and then making the stinging worse which makes me tear up while I’m flying down the goddamn highway—but eyeshadow wise, I only have a couple of palettes, and a few single-pan shades! I have a Pat McGrath Mothership palette (Mothership II, sublime), which is my absolute favourite. And a Chanel quad, which is nice and portable! And then I impulse bought the Huda Rose Quartz palette last year, literally days before I sprained my ankle and ruined my life. I haven’t had much of a chance to wear it since! The colours are very dreamy—shimmery lavenders and pinks and I like the romance of the idea of wearing them, but—oh my God I just gave myself an idea for something. Maybe an anime boyfriend smearing our shimmery eyeshadow with his thumb??? hmmm hmm.
11 notes · View notes
thomas-j-nook · 8 months
Text
Feeling okay.
Did a lot of thinking. I really don't like who I've become.
I know i can change and i crave it. I have fallen into a hole where i crave attention. Not a look at me attention but a help me, comfort me, fix my isses attention. I want to be taken care of. The first person that shows me a hint of compassion and kindness i jump on to. I rely on them because i think i need to be cared for, i need to be loved, i need to know someone gives a shit.
I think i attatched to ginny so quickly because i have never felt care like that from someone before. And yeah it could be mom issues which is embarrassing as hell. Lorraine brought that up. I can't tell if thats the case.
Talking this week to mark and ginny really made me think about a lot of things. Who am I? Mark saw me comfertable at portcon and asked what the difference was at program. That caused me to think a lot.
I thought about my past. After high school i really grew into my own person. I was a bad bitch to be honest. I had my own apartment. I went to college full time, and i worked full time. I worked at kmart for 3 years and the inn for years. I fell into a leadership role at the inn. I was supporting others, and i was good at it. I got a $2 an hour raise just 3 weeks after i started. Now i look at myself and i think i could never work. I can. I can't work with my current behaviors. I look back and i honesty think what the fuck happened? I was always very shy and timmid
I relied on just myself for so long. And now i rely on others to care for me. I really like and care about ginny. I like talking with her but what I've been doing has not been fair to her. Last week seemed stressful for bkth mark and ginny. Mark was in pain, their house needed repairs, ginny juggles day support, shared living and the vets, someone hit her car. I went home yesterday and thought about all their stresses. How they nkt some magical being and has everything under control. They are human. They had a very stressful week and my behaviors on tuesday and Wednesday added stress. I added more to there plate. People who care about people don't do that.
I don't want to be the person who adds stress to others. Yes. I have bipolar but i need to stop using that as an excuse for my melt downs and behavior. I need to be putting in work as much even more work to better myself they they are.
I can sit here and nit pick and complain that we don't go out enough at program or i don't play dnd. Woe is me type atuff but have the ability to change that.
I will say i think the big turning point was actually during therepy yesterday. I asked to play world of darkness a few weeks ago. I was told if i was serious logan would help me. During therapy ginny mentioned to lorraine part of me doing a half day was because i didn't play those games. And she said "if kasey has help, its like someone else was playing for her" that really hurt. It seems like such a small thing. It was not ment to hurt me. But i wanted to try world of darkness to increase my communication. Talking is easier in games. I also chose to do it because I've decided i want to be part of the group. I feel so left out and most the times its because my own actions. Me wanting to participate in world of darkness was a huge step. I agree it's not an easy one. I bought dice. I read about the game. It was not talked about other them me expressing interest m. Yesterday when she said that i kinda felt like it she shut it down. I felt like she didn't believe i could play the game due to its social aspects. I want to try.
When we first played cards against humanity jacob read the cards for me. I didn't speak the entire game and i made the change. One day i said. I'm going to read these cards on my own. And i have sonce that day. Belive me its not easy for me to read cards that say "ginormous penis" but i do it.
What would i like program to look like for me
Staying all day thursdays. Joining world of darkness. If world of darkness does not work i can sit with them and type their story as they go. A recap. Then they have the campain all in a story mode. I can do "last week on world or darkness" and read a brief summary to them. I'd love to play but i do have alternitive back ups.
I want to rebuild a relation with ginny where she is there for support but i also respect her boundries
I want to control my thinking and feelings. If i get upset and i need to go outside and scream and stomp my feet so be it. I can't threaten to go home. I need to re collect myself.
If i need anything I'd like to feel comfertable with approaching other staff. I'd like ginny to know that she can leave without worring and take care of herself/others. I'm starting to feel comfertable with mark. I'm still nervous with logan. I can get into that later. I have reasons. Nothing on him. He's really caring and nice.
I would like to stop shaking my head yes or no. I can verbally say yes and no easily.
Its been hard but these last few weeks have been emotional and I've had many chats with mark and ginny. I like who i am. I don't like how i present myself. I'm really funny, witty, and i love sharing my interests. I don't let clients see that side of me and now I'm afraid too. It would be like if cayden came back tuesday and when asked about his vacation he'd say "it was absolutely amazing. Nothing went wrong. I love my family. Best vacation in the world" it would be different. But if he did there may be an initial shock that hes sunshine and rainbows but the shock with face and become the new norm. Caydens the kind of person that would say "yeah. I saw one of the wonders of the world... But the day after i got a splinter so not a great time" and we expect that. I think i need to not worry about the shock factor I'll recive because a talking kasey can become the new norm. Henry could wake up and decide to never talk about serial killers again. It would be a change but I'd get use to it. I can used to changes in other clients so they should be able to get used to changes i chose to do for myself.
I'm fairly level headed right now. No racing though. A lot of self reflection but not throw myself a pitty party about it. More of a how can i change this. I could be doing more then I've been doing. And the longer i wait to make the change the harder it will get. I've already waited until im 32. I don't want to be 60 and be like this. Im stating that I'm leval headed now because this is not mania talking. I'm not just talking out my ass. As much as i struggled this week i have never wanted to change myself so badly before.
I definitely want to do full days on thursdays. I can do this. I should have no issues after being there 5 years.
I talked to wynter a little about this. I mentioned how i could change and i wish for more community outings but i also stated marks been in pain, some of the clients would rather not go out. And we need to have enough people in agreement. We talked about them hiring a new dsp and wynter agreed that some dsps are horrible. Its hard to just pick someone up off the street and and have them work for your company thay you built from the ground up. We dicussed a team meeting to go over a little of this and i told wynter i felt kind of bad because i don't them to think I'm just bitching but i also want to share my voice because if i never posted about excited i was for world of darkness and how disappointed i was they woukd never know. I would pent that up intil i boiled over. I wish logan wanted to go out more because it would be cool if he was able to take 2/3 of us to bullmoose or places he's familiar with. I did fine riding with him to buffalo wild wings. To be honest i think logan can run group activities and do outings. He's actually really good at it. I don't think he knows that but I've had many dsps and as far as community outings logan is laid back just the right amount but still very attentive. He's similar to ginny. We does not hover yet he know where we are. I've had some dsps who go off shopping for themselves and I've had some who watch me like I'm about to shove something in my mouth. Like right on top of me. There has been times I've been embarrassed to go out with dsps in the community but logans never been one. That can be shared with him. I do respect that he treats us like adults yet offers supports. I think sometimes he may doubt his dsp capability but he's never been on my shit list. Almost every dsp I've worked with has ended up on it, on and off. Taylor made me run...he was on that list for like a month. Lmao. My old baby sitter made it on there often. Caligh has been on it, dawn, mark, ginny. I've had enough anger at him for him to be on my list. I'm not saying he's the worlds best dsp but i like his dsp style. its rare to never have been on my shit list I'm just realizing this
Ive been writing this on and off for a few hours now. I don't want to make 100 posts. But yes i am serious about getting my act together. Last time this happened ginny spoke sturn to me and that was kinda of an omg moment. I need to change. I feel like I've gone back to before she talked stern to me. Same behaviors and attitude. That was also something i relized. When she was stern i got my shit together quick. It was hard to have her be stern but i can't deny that the effect hit me more then babying me. The talk we had yesterday brings similar feeling to that. The i need and i can get myself together feelings. Being asked to leave early sounded like an awesome thing. I can watch tv and chill. But the reason behind it didn't feel so good. I was not being asked to leave early to go home and play video games. I was being asked early because i was not handeling myself the way i should be and ginny needed a break. She needed to do other things and not worry or have to stop to come talk to me. It was not that they could not handle it or they didn't want me around it was that i could not handle myself. I definitely want to stay thursdays. Its not so much the fact i want to prove to them that i got this but i need to prove to myself also. As far as outings. I'd be happy just going down to the gazebo. We could bring a cold lunch and play a round of uno there.
There is a fuck ton i need to work on. But I've been told at program multiple times "tell us how we can help and we will help" they are kind of running blindly around me guessing what will work because i can't tell them. I did some good things the past few weeks but i can see how my bad days outweighed them. I told everything when it was time to pick up and get ready to go home. I reccomended sweet tooth to the group. Even gave a small butchered summary. Ive been trying to text logan more. But i had melt downs that made my two steps forward take 3 steps back.
Kinda just chilling. Thinking about myself. I've been decent today. I woke up crying over the thursday half a day thing and i quickly stopped and brainstormed how i could make it better. Crying makes me feel better but it does fix anything.
Big talks to be had with lorraine and my med manager. I kinda opened up a lot more to wynter today and i can't tell you how good it felt. And we ended up laughing and talking threw my frustrations. She also said infinite potential is on her list of top programs. She thinks they are unique and says it's a pretty special place.
0 notes
heathermason1983 · 2 years
Text
I associate the whole lay away practice in chain stores with kmart. Coincidentally i don't think i've heard the words "lay away" mentioned since the local kmart closed down like ten fucking years ago. To be honest i don't think our kmart even did lay away.
But man do i miss that tiny little grimy fucking horribly disgusting and depressing little caesars pizza in that kmart. You'd see it among the dingy linoleum, almost shining like a beacon, and very occasionally actually shining like a beacon with the faulty flickering fluorescent lights, but it was usually pretty dark in there. The disgusting tables and chairs that had maybe been sprayed down and wiped MAYBE 4 or 5 times when the store first opened but not since then. The tables were red. The chairs had cracked vinyl seats. There would never, ever be anyone standing at the counter. There'd never, ever be anyone at all standing around in there. No employees and no customers. I never, EVER saw a single customer aside from me and my mom and sister ever sit down and eat in there. I had never seen another customer stand at the counter to order. Ever. You'd have to go up to the counter and just wait. Sometimes for quite a while. And then some teenager that wanted to kill themselves would shuffle out from the back and say in the most dismal voice you've ever heard another human speak in, "what can I get you" and i'd always want a plain cheese, i'd settle for pepperoni but i would pick the pepperonis off. If it was a very good day they would have sausage and that would be my first pick any time they had it.
I fucking miss kmart. I feel so old. My bones are practically dust at this point.
0 notes
xignis · 2 years
Text
every day im haunted by the special kmart edition of windwaker i saw at the thrift store but never got. it was so fucking funny
Tumblr media
like cool awesome
1 note · View note
butwhyduh · 3 years
Text
Fit to be Tied
Tumblr media
Jason Todd x reader
Warning: Christmas? And the f word.
Christmas series 2
Jason didn’t pay much attention to holidays. Nope. That was for the living. He didn’t have much of need for it. But he did know that Christmas was quiet and New Years was busy for patrol. He guessed everyone ate Christmas dinner and and then got bored of playing nice. Or maybe that just wanted to start the new year with a big ass bang. Who knows?
Even when he was a kid, he didn’t celebrate the holidays. Too poor, mom too lost in drugs, and dad? Well fuck him. He was a piece of shit when he was around.
Jason kicked a beer can out of his way into the pile of trash on the sidewalk. They didn’t get the trash again this week it looked like. Daddy Bruce could play bat but couldn’t throw his money around enough to keep trash from piling on the street.
It was fine. He had more important things to do anyways. He had to buy a Christmas present. He didn’t care for the holidays but the sweet girl he had at home was a doll and fuck, if she didn’t deserve something. So Jason went down to the local pawn shop. Usually not a problem but it was 2 AM. Not exactly prime business hours.
So yes, Red Hood was breaking into a pawn shop to get a bracelet. He was leaving cash, $20 over the cost too. It was something you had seen earlier in the week and had admired. Gems of some kind shaped to look like a butterfly. You’d taken a minute longer to stare at it.
He left as quick as he came. And it wasn’t long until he was opening the window of your apartment dressed in street clothes. You were asleep. Jason had used the excuse of patrol to get out. But in the early morning hours of Christmas, he wanted to wake you.
“Princess,” he said gently. You moved a little before opening your eyes. You smiled up at him. Fuck, he didn’t deserve the way you looked at him. Your eyes looked so innocent and sweet. You never looked at him like he scared you.
“Jaybird, what’s going on?”
“I got you something for Christmas and it’s technically Christmas..” he said pulling out the box. You sat up, curious.
“It’s Christmas Eve. You got me something? I didn’t think we were- I didn’t get anything. I couldn’t-“ you said turning red. Money was too tight to consider it. The fact that the heat was still on this late in the month was a Christmas miracle.
“No no. It’s fine. Just being here is enough for me. I’ve never really celebrated Christmas anyways,” Jason said pushing the box in your hand. You held the box before kissing him.
You opened the box to see the bracelet you had been looking at the pawn shop. You smiled and stared at the pretty little butterfly. Jason watched you carefully for a reaction. He’d never admit it but he was more nervous now than fighting on the street.
“You saw me looking at it. I didn’t think you’d notice,” you murmured softly as you picked it up. Jason took it and wrapped it around your wrist. He clasped it on and you looked at it, moving your wrist in the light.
“Thank you. It’s beautiful,” you said quietly looking at it. You had a little grin on your face. Jason smiled. That’s the look he wanted. That little bit of happiness that you showed when you were really pleased. He intertwined his fingers in yours.
“Princess, you’re so cold,” Jason said with a frown. He could feel it colder outside but now that he was getting used to the temperature, it wasn’t warm as it should be.
“The heater was acting up again so I turned it down. The blankets are plenty warm,” you said and his heart all but broke. There was no way he was going to let you be cold all winter because the landlord wouldn’t fix things. He might pay this guy a visit. You sensed his anger.
“It’s okay, Jay. Come lay with me and get warm,” you said taking his hands. He let you pull him into bed. He kicked off his pants and shoes and laid on his side. You curled into him as a little spoon. His long big frame all but engulfed you. It always felt to protective. If he was holding you, he knew you were safe. Jason ran his fingers along your bracelet soft as his rough fingers could.
“You’re so good to me,” you said softly and his heart clenched again. Fuck, if you knew all the bad he did. His messed up past. He thought you would have run away when you first learned he was Red Hood but no, you had been kind.
“Naw, Princess you deserve more then this shitty place,” he said, and for the first time, he felt a little bad about giving all of his trust fund to the soup kitchen he would visit as a kid. A little would have been nice to get a better place for you. But he had been making a ton crushing the drug trade at the time and didn’t have a girl back home when he did it. He couldn’t be as reckless now.
You turned in his arms to look in his blue eyes. He has such an intense look on his face that you frowned. “Jaybird, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” he said pulling his face back to normal. “Just thinking. I wanna move you to a better place, a safer place than this,” he said running his thumb across your cheeks. You grasped his wrist and leaned into his touch. Jason would sometimes get like that. Thinking you deserved better. And you humored him even though you wouldn’t even know what to do with wealth.
“We’re moving. Soon. I’m promising now,” he said thinking about the painful conversation he was going to have with Bruce. His adoptive father he hadn’t even told you about. Bruce would do just about anything Jason asked. Probably the guilt of letting him die.
“But Jay, we’d miss the water that went from boiling to freezing at random. And I’m not sure if I can sleep without Mr and Mrs Jancowski having sex every Tuesday at 2 AM,” you said with a smile. He kissed you to shut you up. You were joking but each one felt like a little knife in his guilt. You pulled him over you and the thought of money troubles faded from your mind.
———————————————
Jason woke before you and watched you sleep. You laid on his chest with your hand in his hair and your soft breath on his throat. The bracelet was still on your wrist. You looked so peaceful, trusted him while you slept. Jason carefully grabbed his phone and texted Alfred. He’d also have to tell you about his adoptive family. His very famous adoptive family.
He threaded his fingers in your hand that was flung across his waist. You began to stir. Jason moved hair from your face and you blinked to see his pale blue eyes watching you.
“Morning, Princess,” he said with a rough morning voice. You smiled.
“Morning, Jaybird.”
“I’ve got something to tell you,” he started. “I want you to meet my family tonight.”
“Tonight? Your family? I thought your parents...” you trailed off.
“I was adopted. I never told you because I don’t have the best relationship with them. But I think it’s time for you to meet them. I’ve got to tell you something else,” he said and you could hear his heart beat quicker as you laid on him.
“My adoptive father is Bruce Wayne.”
Silence.
“You’re shitting me.”
“Nope. And tonight I’m taking you to meet him. And my adoptive siblings.”
“You aren’t joking,” you said sitting up. Jason sat up too.
“I’m not. I’m kinda the... black sheep of the family. He adopted me when I was 12. I was trying to boost the wheels from the b- Bentley he was driving,” Jason corrected. It was one thing to tell you he was Red Hood. He couldn’t say Bruce Wayne was Batman.
“Wow. I- wow. Okay. That’s a lot to take in. Also on brand to be honest,” you said and he smiled and shrugged.
“Wait. What the fuck do you wear to the freaking Wayne manor for Christmas Eve?” You said a little panicky.
“Whatever you want. It’s just family,” he said with a sideways smile.
“Oh no. I can’t go to freaking Wayne Manor in a Kmart sweater,” you said quickly.
“You can wear,” he said hopping out of bed. He dug way in the back of his closet for a pretty red sweater that was slightly oversized. “This. Should fit fine. Pretty expensive too.”
“Where the hell did you get that?”
“I’ve had it for year and it definitely doesn’t fit now,” Jason said with a laugh. “Try it on.”
—————————————
The weather sucked. Freaking sleet that threatened everything it touched. You were grateful it wasn’t a night of Jason patrolling. This meant taking your car instead of Jason’s motorcycle. Your car was at least 15 years old and you called it Frankenstein because of all the repairs done over the years.
The radio skipped as Jason drove over a speed bump by Wayne Manor and you burst out laughing. Jason looked at you from the side.
“It’s not that funny,” he said. “What’s up?”
“My car is trash, I’m wearing your old sweater, and we’re late. If you weren’t the black sheep before, bringing me home, you will be now,” you said. He grabbed your hand and parked in front of a random house.
“I’ve been the black sheep since I was a kid and you aren’t going to change any thing for the worse. Trust me. In fact they’ll probably think you’re too good for me,” Jason said with a dry chuckle. “So don’t worry about anything. Except making room for pudding. I know it sounds weird,” he said starting to drive again. “But it’s the best part of Christmas.”
Wayne Manor was huge. You knew that. You’d even seen it on tv. But to see it in front of you was honestly terrifying, especially in the nasty weather. You almost hoped Jason was playing some weird elaborate joke and was going to drive on by but he knew the passcode to the gate. He drove in the covered drop off spot by the front door and parked. You both quickly ran in the building.
The front entry was breathtaking. A gigantic Christmas tree and a full staircase decked out in garland like a Hallmark movie. It was like a magazine. In fact, it was in the Christmas episode of Gotham Life the year before.
You gripped Jason’s hand tightly as you walked down the hall. Your shoes sounded unnaturally loud and you had the urge to quiet them like it was a library. Jason pulled you to the doorway of a dinning room full of people settling to eat. Jadon cleared his throat.
“Master Jason! You made it,” Alfred said excitedly. “I recieved your message but it’s been many years. Sit. Sit.”
“Glad you could come,” Jason’s brother Dick said with a grin. He looked at you in curious excitement. You looked down at some kind of mushroom soup placed in front of you. Everyone else was dressed so nicely and ate so perfectly. It was intimidating.
“Yeah, it’s Christmas,” Jason said shrugging. He gave Dick a look that said don’t ask. It didn’t take much for Dick to drop it because he seemed incredibly distracted. You spent most of the meal trying to keep up on conversations you clearly didn’t understand while trying food you’ve never seen before. You could barely remember everyone you were introduced to. One of Jason’s sister(s?) gave you a big hug along with everyone else when she arrived. You couldn’t tell anyone what was even said after the meal. Or so you thought.
Until right across from you, Dick proposes to his girlfriend. He stuttered around before finally asking. “Will you marry me? Oh god, I have a ring,” he said producing one. Everyone watched as she stared in the box.
“Will I marry you?” She asked faintly and you worried she’d say no. How terrible would it be??
“Please say something,” he pleaded and you could tell the man was practically in pain before she said yes. They kissed, the family applauded, and champagne was served.
Jason watched you from the corner of his eyes. How did you react to this? What did you think? You didn’t look jealous or anything. It made Jason think of marriage. He hadn’t before. He’d thought about moving into something more permanent but marriage. He’d never thought about marriage as his future, ever. Of course when you die at 16 and come back with a vengeance, love is low on the priority list.
“Jaybird, you there,” you asked slightly tapping his shoulder. He blinked and looked at you.
“Yeah, I’m here. Just in my head,” he said and you nodded. He’d do that sometimes.
“The party is moving to the parlor,” you said quietly in a proper rich Gothamite voice and Jason huffed before covering his smiling mouth with a nose rub. The rest of the group was moving ahead of you. Dick and his new fiancé were retiring for the night.
“I’m never going to hear the end of it, am I?”
“I’m so sorry, dearest. I can’t understand you with a silver spoon in your mouth,” you laughed. Jason rolled his eyes before guiding your shoulders towards the door. You heard a soft laugh behind you and you turned to see Tim’s girlfriend smiling.
“Sorry to interrupt but I’ve got to use that on Tim,” she said grabbing her coat and walking out.
After making sure you were cool with hanging with Tim’s girlfriend and their adoptive sister Cass, Jason and Tim started a very competitive game of pool. You couldn’t help but look at things that cost more than you’ve ever even seen. The chess set Damian and his girlfriend were playing with probably cost more than your car.
But it was Christmas and you tried to push your insecurities aside. It was a fun evening. A glass of wine you kept sipping on helped as well.
After a while Bruce announced that the roads were too bad and that no one was leaving. Jason clenched his jaw for a second before looking at you and relaxing. He didn’t want to stay but he wasn’t risking your health in any way. Instead he focused on the game.
“So if I win,” Jason said a full hour later. By this time, Damian’s girlfriend had fallen asleep on his shoulder. Your eyes felt a little heavy as well. “I get the penthouse.”
“Sure Jay. That’s Bruce’s. But I’m willing to gamble it,” Tim said throwing his hands up at the ridiculousness.
“I accept terms,” Bruce said. Both boys looked at him surprised. “Whoever wins gets the penthouse.”
You turned quickly to watch the game. Okay, is that a normal thing for them? To bet property. The look on everyone’s face said that no it wasn’t normal.
Jason was excellent at pool. It was a common for you both to go down to the pool hall and play some games. Jason would occasionally make some money playing and he did often as a kid. It was also a way to waste time when your mom was throwing beers back like a fish, like Jason’s mother did. Tim didn’t stand a chance. He wasn’t as good and looked almost like he was in pain occasionally. But maybe it wasn’t a real competition? Maybe Bruce was trying to give Jason something he’d always want to but didn’t know how. Jason easily won the game.
“So the penthouse is mine?” Jason asked. Bruce nodded and shrugged. Tim softly coughed in his hand. Your heart raced. They couldn’t be serious.
“If you’ll live in it,” Bruce said. Damian was carefully carrying his girlfriend upstairs.
“Deal,” Jason says quickly.
“Deal,” Bruce said looking quiet pleased. Was this his plan all along?
“I guess, deal?” Tim said confused. “Though you should owe me. You’re the one that got me shot.”
Your brain broke. He was shot? And it was Jason’s fault?
“What?! You got him shot?” Tim’s girlfriend asked loudly. Tim blanched.
“Not my fault.”
“Literally your fault,” Tim countered.
“What did you do?” You asked looking at him suspiciously. He offered you a sheepish smile.
“I might have said ‘what are you gonna do, shoot us?’ I meant me. Not Tim! He also has a bulletproof suit,” Jason said. Tim must be a vigilante too. You glared at Jason.
“That’s not in the report,” Bruce said with his eyes narrowing.
“Good night everybody. Merry Christmas,” Jason said pulling you from the room and up to his childhood room.
“You’re in so much trouble,” you said and he grinned.
“I’ll deal with it tomorrow. How do you feel about a penthouse? Better than our current place hu?” Jason said pulling you close. You felt dizzy at the idea.
“Seriously? We can’t afford it,” you said trying to stay grounded. It was too good to be true. Things like that didn’t happen to people like you.
“I think I know a guy who can keep the lights on,” he joked and you gave him a serious look. “Don’t worry about it. Just enjoy the idea of constant hot water. Lights never going off,” Jason said pushing you towards the bed. “No one can hear me make you scream.”
“Tempting. Very tempting,” you said and of fucking course it was. A safe beautiful clean penthouse over your trashy scary apartment wasn’t even a contest. Jason pushed you on the bed and hovered over you.
“What are you doing,” you asked flushed but still encouraging him. It was still his dad’s house and he was getting handsy.
“Trying to have sex with my girlfriend on my old bed like every guy ever has dreamed of,” Jason said. He nipped at your throat. You gasped.
“Got to be quiet, Princess,” he whispered and you pulled him down to kiss more.
————————————
The next morning you woke to an empty bed. You fixed your hair as best you could and threw on Jason’s sweatshirt before going downstairs. You caught a glimpse of the kitchen as Bruce slowly slid a set of keys Jason’s way before taking a long drink from his coffee. “I’m glad you made home for Christmas this year, Jason.” The penthouse.
“Morning,” Bruce said to you nodding before leaving the room. Jason was alone in the kitchen but you could hear others in the breakfast nook a door over.
“Keys,” Jason said showing you. “And no lecture.”
You gave him a hug and looked at the shiny metal keys. It would be a while before you could handle the idea of a freaking penthouse being yours. “But you should get something for Tim. You did get him shot.”
“Let him shoot me?”
“Jason, no.”
1K notes · View notes
turnedahero · 3 years
Text
HAPPY  VALENTINES  DAY  TO  JANET  @mrflayed​  !  
                 he  fought  with  himself  on  this...  there  was  all  these  other  dudes  racing  each  other  and  piling  into  kmart  to  get  that  ‘special’  person  or  whatever  gifts  for  valentine’s  day.  he  sat  back  in  the  leather  seat  of  his  camaro,  watching  behind  dark  aviators  and  snorting  to  himself.  yeah,  he  rolled  his  eyes  at  first  and  vowed  he’d  never  be  that  softy.  but  he  ended  up  being  THAT  softy  when  he  dwelled  on  it  a  day  later  and  knew  how  much  it  would  make  heather  happy.  
      he  was  embarrassed  walking  in,  picking  this  kind  of  stuff  out,  coming  from  a  father  who  tried  to   beat  misogyny  into  him  and  made  him  feel  bad  and  out  of  place  for  just  wanting  to  do  something  kind  without  some  sort  of  agenda  behind  it.  billy  wasn’t  programmed  to  be  so  thoughtful,  but  here  he  was.  disobeying  his  father’s  will  and  sneaking  into  kmart  with  the  rest  of  these  lovesick  goons.  god,  neil  would  have  a  fucking  fit  if  he  knew  his  son  was  acting  just  like....a  gentleman  and  not  a  woman  hater  like  him.
       it  started  with  wanting  to  do  this  for  heather  and  right  as  he  was  eyeballing  all  the  damn  candy  aisle  ten  was  stuffed  with  in  confusion,  all  this  pink  and  red  stuff  was  practically  falling  out  of  the  damn  shelves,  he  thought  of  her  mother  too.  well,  shit.  he  couldn’t  leave  janet  out.  he  didn’t  want  to  leave  her  out.  that  woman  had  been  through  just  as  much  as  her  daughter  and  she  had  been  the  only  other  person  in  the  world  that  had  been  so  nice  to  him.  and  he  would  never  forget  that.  so  it  was  settled...  he  was  getting  two  girls  gifts  they  deserved.   he  chose  some  stuff,  picked  out  of  his  money  he  earned  over  the  summer  combined  with  last  weeks  pay  for  helping  a  guy  with  his  carburetor  and  got  the  hell  out  of  kmart  before  someone  saw  he  was  ever  there.  
Tumblr media
         he  caught  janet  at  the  perfect  time...   with  her  back  turned  while  she  was  doing  dishes.  it  was  easy  to  sneak  right  in  and  place  the  bouquet  of  red  roses  down  on  the  dinner  table  with  a  teddy  bear  that  held  a  heart  shaped  tray  of  cupcakes  from  the  bakery  and  a  big  heart  balloon  tied  to  it’s  arm.  then  he  creeped  up  behind  her  and  casually  nudged  her  out  of  the  way  of  the  sink,   “let  me  take  this.”  smile  growing  wide,  taking  the  plate,  “cause  i  THINK  there’s  something  better  waiting  for  you--  behind  you.”  blue  hues  turn  to  the  valentine  gifts  sitting  on  the  table,  gesturing  her  to  look  that  way.
7 notes · View notes
dastardlydandelion · 3 years
Text
respice finem
ao3 link
content warnings: referenced violence and abuse
part one link
obligatory irl inspo link
Max keeps pacing up and down the diameter of the room. She stretches her hands over her head and Billy thinks her protective hovering is starting to bug the nurses. They both stayed overnight but Billy’s at least taken a couple breaks. He got himself some Doritos from the vending machine. Borrowed and smoked a cigarette even though he virtually quit a couple years back. Took a short drive to a Kmart up the road and bought Max a change of clothes, supposing he wouldn’t able to get her anything of her own if her home was wrapped in caution tape.
“You wanna go down to the cafeteria, maybe? Get something to eat?”
“Not hungry.”
“Okay…did you know they have a gift shop? Wanna go check it out?”
“No.”
“Do you—“
“I’m not leaving, Billy.” Max’s eyes glitter in a stubborn glower.
“Oh, but maybe you should, sweetheart,” Susan says softly. “You’re getting restless.”
“I’m fine.”
“You should get out of this stuffy room. Go for a stroll, stretch your legs. I would if I could.”
Pure heartbreak flashes across Max’s face and Billy feels his own lurch.
“Oh dear, bad joke.” Susan frowns and flaps her hand, the tube connecting it to the IV pouch swaying gently in the air. “That was in poor taste, I apologize. But I do think you need to get some fresh air, Max. I’ll be fine.”
Max pauses. Her hands come together and she taps her thumbs together as she mulls it over.
“I’d feel better if you stayed here.” Max shifts her gaze to Billy.
“Didn’t plan on going anywhere,” he says honestly. Max is obviously wired and getting more antsy by the minute but Billy is the opposite. He’s wiped out after driving for several hours straight and aching from head to toe after scrapping with his dad.
“…alright,” Max relents after a very long moment. “I’ll be back in fifteen.”
She gently swipes the back of her hand over her mother’s cheek. Susan blinks contentedly and hums in approval as Max trudges off to the door. She leaves. Susan's gaze flickers to Billy and then down. She frowns at the guardrail of the bed and uncertainly pushes at it with her palm.
“What’re you doing, Sue?”
“I don’t need this. I’m not going to roll out of bed.” She continues pushing at the guardrail but her efforts are weak and uncoordinated. Even if she had more power and precision behind her pushes, Billy’s pretty sure these things aren’t designed to be collapsed from the patient’s position.  
“It’s fine, just leave it alone.”
“No,” she refuses, eyes narrowing. “It’s in my way, Billy. It’s separating us.”
Something knocks loose inside his chest. Billy hasn’t seen her in three months. He hadn’t been particularly sure he’d ever see her again.
“Okay, okay, I’ll give it a go. Here.” He sighs out and messes with the thing and after a couple tries and a few silent shrieks from his very sore shoulders, he finally figures out how to get the damn rail lowered, adjusting it accordingly.
“Thank you so much,” Susan breathes. “Now it's easier to do this.”
She stretches out her slender fingers and rests her hand upon his knee. She gives it a couple dulcet pats. Her pinky pokes inside the fraying tear in the denim, soft pad of her fingertip cool against his skin. Billy swallows, wonders how much he is allowed to touch. She wouldn’t be this affectionate with him if she knew.
“It’s my fault Neil found you and Max,” Billy admits, heart pumping guilt like sludge in his veins. “It’s my fault he almost killed you.”
“What?” Susan stares at with owlish eyes.
“I wanted to send Max a gift in the mail,” Billy explains, speaking slowly and plainly. “I hid it under my bed. My dad saw it when he raided my room looking for some shit he thought I stole from him. That’s how he got your address. I tried to stop him, Susan. But I couldn’t…I’m sorry.”
“Oh, Billy.” Susan signs, rubbing her lips together. Her hand travels from his knee to his wrist and she gently pushes up his jacket cuff. Billy doesn’t stop her. He watches her eyes darken at the sight of the bruises.
“I’m sorry,” he repeats.
“You said it was a gift for Max?”
“Yeah…new skateboard.”
“I wish you would’ve just driven over to drop it off. Because if you came over, you would’ve seen how nicely we decorated our little duplex…you could’ve seen my darling little gnomes sipping tea and these delightfully clever novelty magnets Max found for the refrigerator. You could’ve sat on our couch and while it’s a bit worn— we got it secondhand —it’s very comfy. Maybe if you saw how nice everything was and sat in our cushy, comfy couch, you wouldn’t have wanted to leave.”
Billy gapes at her, noncomprehending. He just confessed he’s the reason she almost got killed. That it's his fault his dad literally broke into her home to beat her to death with a wrench. And Susan doesn’t seem angry at all. He knows she's on the good shit, but still. She's not out of it. She heard what he said. Ahd she is frowning but it’s a more fretful expression than anything, dimple between her eyebrows, forehead crinkled in concern.
“I waited for you, Billy.”
Oh.
“We talked about this before you left, Susan,” Billy gently reminds her. “I told you why I chose to stay. Remember?”
“You wanted to protect us,” she murmurs, thumb chary as she rolls it over his bruised wrist. “Me and Max.”
Billy solemnly nods his head.
“Mm…” Susan’s eyes rove the room and then settle back on him as her lips curl into a doleful smile. “How well do you suppose that turned out?”
Billy’s eyes travel along the chest tube to the rectangular drainage unit on the floor, the printed numbers and increments he doesn’t really understand. Glances to her legs elevated on the pillows. The right one was more badly broken. Not badly enough to require surgery, but still too swollen for a hard cast. The swelling in her left went down and Susan got fitted for a cast just a couple hours ago. The dark purple color she picked matches the massive bruise that currently blooms across most of Billy’s back.
“I’m sorry.” He bows again even though it hurts, it hurts, he’s goddamn sore but not as sore as he is sorry. Billy feels the knot tremble in his throat and he is possibly more sorry than he’s ever been anything else in his life. There is a beast in his belly with a thousand guilty eyes and shame in every one of its silent, miserable cries.
“No, no, raise your head. Don’t— it’s not your fault, Billy.” He feels Susan’s hand sweep the fringe from his face in a few quick motions, delicate and deft. “Won’t you look at me?”
Warily, he glances up. Susan’s eyes are misting up as he feels his own stinging again. Shit. Max is going to kill him if he makes her mother cry.
“I am the one who needs to apologize," Susan declares. "For the life of me, I couldn’t convince you to come with us. I failed you.”
“What?” Billy scoffs in disbelief. “No, that’s not on you. I’m stubborn, I’m—“
“I am the adult,” Susan cuts him off, voice sharp even as her hand rests against his cheek lamb gentle. “The real adult, you're barely twenty. You did what you thought was best but I’m older and I knew better, and I couldn’t make you see it. I let you stay, I left you in the lion’s den.”
Billy doesn't really see it that way. He doesn't feel like a child, doesn't want to be treated as one. And he's no longer Neil's legally, albeit he's been nowhere near financially independent. Couldn't work for a long time after that gruesome nightmare turned reality that was the worst fucking Fourth of July ever. Had to fork over all his paychecks to Neil even after he could go back to work— supposedly put toward residual medical bills insurance didn't cover, but hell if Billy truly trusted any excuse Neil could and would hold over his head. In any case, that's not entirely why he stayed with Neil. And staying with Neil wasn't even exactly the same thing as not going with Susan and Max, but abandonment wasn't a factor in the equation at all. He doesn't feel that way, how could Susan think that?
“You left me the address,” Billy pointedly reminds her and he does not let himself crane his face into her touch even though it’s cool and soft and he feels his stomach loosen with this, this featherlight clemency so careful and sweet.
Because of course he knows why he was left the address and it was never so he could mail packages.
“I should’ve grabbed you and dragged you to the car.” Susan doesn’t sound like she’s kidding.
“You could’ve,” Billy breathes and he’s not kidding either. “You’ve seen me get grabbed, Susan. I don’t fight it. Not in the house. Never did…not until he found that address.”
Susan’s thumb brushes away the tear that spills over, unbidden. Billy reaches out and does the same for hers.
“I’m not mad,” he promises in earnest.
“Neither am I. In fact, I’m…” Susan trails off, exhaling heavily as she draws her hand back from his cheek. “I don’t know, Billy. He was going to kill me. Maybe both of us and I could never say that I’m glad that happened because I am not. I am not glad Max had to see and do what she saw and did. I am not glad that at present, I cannot even stand without assistance. But…you’re here. You’re here because of what happened. Because of what happened, Neil…I never have to worry about Neil again. I never, ever have to look over my shoulder worrying about when he will find me because he already did.”
“That’s one way of looking on the bright side, I guess,” Billy mutters, voice hollow.
“Your father has done all the harm he will ever be able to do, to any of us, and now we’re together again. Isn’t there something to be said for that, Billy?”
He swallows thickly, nodding his head as he places his hand on the bed. Susan’s fingers slide over his and that’s how Max finds them when she returns.
“There you are,” Susan welcomes, smiling warmly. “That was a bit longer than fifteen minutes.”
Max freezes. “Did you need me?”
“No, honey, I’m fine. We’re fine. I’m just happy that you took a good break.”
Max visibly relaxes and shuffles over, lightly squeezing her mother’s upper arm. “I saw Neil.”
Billy exchanges a look of shock with Susan.
“Yeah, he had a new guard today and we talked for a couple minutes. Cool lady with a cool name, like some Greek Goddess name. She gave me a dollar for the vending machine and let me in his room.”
“Are you okay?” Susan frowns, worry crossing her features as her lashes flutter.
“Yeah, Mom. Neil doesn’t scare me anymore.” Max leans in and presses another kiss to the crown of her Susan’s head. Billy’s never seen her more affectionate than this, so doting and tender with her injured mother. “It was actually good. To see Neil like that…to know I did that. It confirms it, I guess? I mean not that I didn’t know, because obviously I know I didn't dream or hallucinate what happened, but…”
“Seeing is believing, perhaps?” Susan tilts her head, mussy red tresses shifting over the pillowcase.
“Yeah, like that. Seeing is believing, I guess. I saw the neck brace and the handcuffs and now I’m…well I’m not gonna turn into a badger every time you want me to take a break.” Max’s mouth quirks, expression sobering when she glances to Billy. “Are you gonna see him?”
“I don’t know,” Billy answers. He keeps thinking about it.
Maybe he’d feel better like Max does. Maybe he’d feel worse. He thinks he’d hate himself if he wound up having some scrap of sympathy. He thinks maybe he’d rip the pillow out from under his father’s head and smother the rest of the life out of him. He thinks he would have the opportunity to say everything he’s ever wanted to say but worries that he would not have the words, worries they may dissolve on his tongue with that stern, steely stare that’s shackled him all his life.
“Not yet,” Billy decides at least.
“You look weird,” Max bluntly blurts, scrunching her nose.
“That’s not nice,” Susan protests in mild reproach.
“It’s not mean,” Max counters, shrugs a shoulder as she looks back to Billy. “You okay? Is it hard being in a hospital again?”
Susan too raises a brow.
Billy reflexively lifts a hand to his chest, curls his jacket in his fist until the button presses uncomfortably into his palm. Few things in his life had been more challenging than his hospital stay and it wasn’t even being in pain or sick or weak, then weaker, then stronger and still in pain— it was sterility. It was being cooped up. It was no privacy whatsoever and never the right noises. It was everything being terrible except Max and Susan even if Max and Susan being around constantly was sometimes terrible but never, ever because they were terrible because they genuinely weren’t and— and now they’re all here again with some of the details rearranged.
Billy realizes that’s the hardest part, maybe, that the details are rearranged. Discovers that maybe it is worse to see someone you care about hurt than hurt yourself. He cannot speak but maybe they know, maybe they can read it in his face because then Susan’s reaching up again, brushing gentle fingertips over his scabbed up knuckles until he relaxes the death grip on the jacket balled into his fist.
“If you decide you want to see Neil, I’ll walk you to the door,” Max offers.
“Thanks,” he manages, terse but sincere.
“And if you want to see him, Mom, I’ll—“
“I don’t,” Susan breaks in, vehement and almost nervous, hand retracting from Billy’s and clasping fast to the opposite above her chest, IV tube swinging again. “I don’t, Max, I really, really don’t.”
“Okay,” Max promises her immediately, gingerly draping an arm around her in a reassuring embrace. The closest to a hug she can manage. “You don’t have to. You never, ever have to see him again, Mom. If you don't want to, you don't have to and that's that. I won't let anyone make you.”
Susan’s eyes dart back and forth as she leans into Max as much as she can, releasing a shaky exhale. Billy’s taken his breaks. They finally got Max to take her break. He thinks maybe Susan needs a break too.
“You wanna see what’s on tv, Sue?” he suggests.
‘No news,’ Max mouths at him above her head. Billy blinks knowingly.
“Sure,” Susan agrees, relaxing and shifting a bit as Max lowers her arm. “Um...maybe the animal channel?”
“Yeah, okay. Let’s see what nature is up to.”
5 notes · View notes
monalisamontauk · 3 years
Text
My Grandmas funeral was yesterday
I was emotional and doing okay until I went up to her casket to look at her one last time. Then that's when I lost it and starting crying super hard. She look so lifeless (obviously) and other things I can't put into words. I'll never get to hold her hand again, or see her smile or hear her laugh. My siblings like to point out I was her favorite. I can't remember the last time I saw her because of COVID.
I always remember spending the night on Fridays then in the morning getting to eat ice cream and cookies for breakfast. Then we walk to the Kmart and to get there we would have to go through an old abandoned cotton field. She would always buy us a little something even though she didn't have a lot of money. She was so sweet and kind.
She died from COVID pneumonia she wasn't experiencing any symptoms until that evening. She couldn't breathe so my aunt called 911 and my Grandma called her a scandalosa and even told the paramedics that my Aunt was being a scandalosa. Then evidently they had to resuscitate her two times on the way to the hospital. Fuck COVID. Fuck those that don't want to wear a mask.
Tumblr media
3 notes · View notes
purplesurveys · 3 years
Text
1041
survey by chasingghosts
What is the age gap between you and your parents? 27 for both. Technically, 26 years with my mom since she had yet to celebrate her birthday when she had me, but she was going to turn 27 all the same. Guh. I can’t believe I’m just five years away from that and I’m still nowhere near building my own family.
How many bathrooms does your house have? Is this enough? Two. I’d say it’s enough. Two people in the family rarely have to go to the bathroom at the same time so it works out for us.
Have you sent a letter to anyone in the past year? Yeah. I used to give Gabie a handwritten letter every Christmas along with her gifts. I still plan on writing her one, but obviously the content will be vastly different now.
Have you ever video chatted with someone you met online? I did this with Carley a handful of times; we’d video chat when I came home from school which was around the time she would get ready for school. She was such an extrovert who was so lovely and bubbly around me, and I’ve always felt bad that she had to contend with my shy ass with my mic always muted lol.
Are you hungry or thirsty right now? I’m neither but I can go for a light meal right now, which is great because I got myself a chicken barbecue sandwich and a caramel macchiato from Starbucks as a treat for myself tonight :) I went through five video call meetings just for today alone, went through several breakdowns while at work, and am also on my period, so I thought I deserved a break.
When was the last time you ate something, and what did you eat? Literally just had a bite from my sandwich.
Have you ever seen the film Boondock Saints? Nope. Sounds nothing like my type of film.
Do you own a pair of gumboots? Nah. I don’t like walking in floods anyway, so I don’t plan on getting a pair.
What colour is your favourite mug? Copper.
How far away from your town/city is your state's capital city? I already live in my province’s capital.
Have you ever worked somewhere where you had to clean the toilets? I haven’t.
Do you know anyone named Doug? No, not really a common name here.
What cut of jeans is your favourite and why? Do mom jeans count as a cut? I’ve been all over those throughout 2020. They’re stylish and yet so comfy, which are two words that seldom go together.
Do you rate people's attractiveness on a scale of 1-10? Uhhhhhhhh unless a friend asked me to rate someone they know, I don’t really think in these terms.
Name a few of your favourite actors. Kate freaking Winslet. Also Kristen Stewart, Emma Stone, Audrey Hepburn, Brie Larson, Florence Pugh, and Eddie Redmayne. I’d name Timothée Chalamet but I have yet to see a work of his.
Do you collect anything, or have you ever? The first item I ever collected was notebooks. In my past relationship (is it obvious I’m not over it yet and probably never will be? Ha) I initially liked to collect receipts from places we went to and ate at. I’d also like to be able to grow a collection of wrestling memorabilia, particularly action figures and belts. It’s not really a life goal of mine but it’d still be a cool thing to achieve.
So, how has your week been so far? I mean it’s only Monday, so nothing much. I cried and broke down a lot today which wasn’t a good start, but tomorrow’s a holiday so no work; and for Thursday I was invited to the Christmas party of the department I initially interned at and apparently they’ll be sending over a Christmas kit over to my place so I’m looking forward to these! It’s super touching they remembered and still invited me even though I’m not a part of the team anymore, so I wouldn’t have missed the party for the world.
Is there anything that you could cry about right now? Definitely, and being on my period at the moment makes it so much easier to cry. But I already cried too much and too hard earlier today and it felt exhausting, so I’m trying to avoid it tonight.
How old were you when you learned how to tie your shoelaces? I was five. I probably would’ve made myself learn later but one of our ‘exams’ in kindergarten was to show that you know how to tie your shoelaces, so I had to ask my grandma to give me a crash course.
Have you ever slept in a car overnight? Why did you have to? Yeah. I had to pull several all-nighters in college and work at 24/7 coffee shops, but I usually gave up by around 2-3 AM and would sleep in the car by then.
When was the last time you used Facebook? Earlier this evening, but I couldn’t scroll too much because spoilers for Start Up are everyyyyyyfuckingwhere and I’m still several episodes away from the finale, which aired last night.
Do you have a PO Box or does your mail get sent straight to your house? Our mails and parcels get sent straight to our door.
Are you interested in entomology? Do you know what that is? Never been. I think it’s great that insects have a lot of capabilities and contributions that we often take for granted; but I personally find a great deal of them icky as well lol so I wouldn’t say I’m interested in this branch.
Have you ever had to claim insurance? What for? Hmm I don’t think so. Not my own nor my parents’. Do you like to listen to albums start-finish without skipping or shuffling? I’ll do this sometimes with my favorite albums, yes. Fuck knows how many times I listened to After Laughter from start to finish with no skips; it was my favorite for a while.
Do you have any unspoken enemies, or maybe frenemies? I’m not the biggest fan of Patrice, but it’s not something I broadcast to people because why would I? I’m sure she slightly does not like me too, so we’re even.
What was the last thing you broke? That would be my last phone charger cord. I’ve since had it replaced though.
Do you have a favourite state/province/territory in your country? Not necessarily an overall favorite but I do have a favorite place I’ve traveled to, which is Sagada. I need a second vacation to see if it still lives up to my expectations and if it would still be able to give me an experience as cathartic and therapeutic as my first trip there, but for the last five years it has sat on the throne.
How many vowels are in your street name? Is this question too mundane? Three. I mean I’ve never been asked this on a survey before, so I wouldn’t call it that.
What are your three top favourite flavours of ice cream? Cookies and cream, chocolate chip cookie dough, coffee.
How far away is the nearest Target? At least a couple thousand miles away.
Do you prefer Target, Kmart or Walmart? Idk and idc.
Have you ever farted in class or somewhere else you shouldn't have? No. I suppress my farts, even when I’m alone haha it’s just my least favorite bodily function.
What's your middle name? Would you change it? I’m not giving it away. I wouldn’t change it and I’m definitely not giving it up even if I get married. I’m keeping my middle name then just hyphenate my surname so that I get to keep all three names.
When was the last tie you wore heels? What was the occasion? September. Job interview for a position I didn’t really want but still chose to undergo because it was still an interview.
Do you find yourself lost for words often? I guess yeah, depression does tend to do that to me.
Did you share baths with your siblings/cousins when you were a child? Yep, I remember sharing the shower with my sister as late as when I was 10. Then puberty happened to me and I did not want to continue the practice anymore, haha.
Have you ever been a member of an online dating site? How did it go? I joined Tinder while I was in a relationship (she made an account as well at the time so it was fair game) literally just to people-watch. I wasn’t interested in cheating; I was just genuinely curious to see how the app worked. I put on a fake name, age, location and my profile photo was of a cat I saw in school so it was impossible to tell it was me.
Do you know what your neighbours even look like? I would not be able to recognize them if you lined them up with a bunch of other strangers, to tell you the truth. I’d probably be able to recognize the carpenters working on the house currently being constructed in front of ours though; they’re super nice and they’re crazy over Cooper haha.
How many siblings does your best friend have? Angela is an only child.
Do you put ketchup on your fries? No. Ketchup does not go anywhere near my fries.
Have you been lucky enough to make out with anyone in the past week? LOL lucky enough...but no, I haven’t done that in a while.
Have your parents ever worked in the agriculture business etc. on a farm? Neither have.
Do you have an ex that makes you angry with literally everything they do? No.
Are you easily susceptible to brain freeze? No but tooth sensitivity, yes. I have a certain tooth that acts up whenever I eat ice cream, and it can get soooo inconvenient and uncomfortable for a few seconds.
5 notes · View notes
19 35 55 71 82
19. Describe your first queer kiss
This boy named Cameron worked with me at Kmart in high school. I was clueless to the fact he was hitting on me all the time and he was this cute butch skater boy with a skater boy body 🥵
One day at the end of his shift he sent me a note saying something like “I think you’re really cute and I also think you’re gay and I hope we can talk sometime”, with his AIM screen name. We talked for 2 hours that night online.
The next day I went in for my shift and he was working. I was in the back warehouse doing receiving stuff and nobody was around. I saw him walk in and he was heading to the break room and he saw me, made a B-line for me, grabbed my face and just planted an amazing fucking kiss right on my lips and wow. I’ve never had that feeling again. Also his lips were ridiculously soft.
35. Do you always fantasise while you masturbate?
Duh
55. How sensitive are your nipples? Does nipple play turn you on?
Mine are kinda sensitive. I get more turned on playing with cute nipples on a nice chest. @europeanbiguy would be an ideal nipple playmate
71. Do you like it in the butt?
Absolutely not.
Sorry
82. Have you ever had sex with more than two people at once (eg., foursome, moresome)?
Numerous occasions. The sugar daddy I had when I was 17 used to host sex parties at his riverfront mansion. Yes he was a predator and yes I finally realized that and got the fuck outta dodge. There is nothing normal about a 47 year old fucking a 17 year old, guys.
1 note · View note
spicychickentendy · 3 years
Note
Admit Stuff: 1-92 😎
Shit ok, I was not expecting someone to ask for all of them at once but here we go..
1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?
- Fuck yes I would 🤤
2. You talked to an ex today, correct?
- Nope..they don’t deserve my time
3. Have you taken someone’s virginity?
- Yepperz
4. Is trust a big issue for you?
- I wouldn’t consider it an issue but it’s very important
5. Did you hang out with a person you like recently?
- Yeah I guess you could say that we hung out ☺️
6. What are you excited for?
- I can’t wait to watch the new episode of Dickinson that just came out today!
7. What happened tonight?
- Well last night I had a few drinks and listened to some hella good music 👌🏼
8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted?
- No I don’t but remember that the world is shit so have a friend with you
9. Is confidence cute?
- Fuck me, yasss!
10. What is the last beverage you had?
- I’m currently drinking water, remember to stay hydrated!
11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?
- Fully trust? Hmm...probably 1
12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans?
- Yepperz
13. What are you going to do Saturday night?
- After work I’m getting my haircut and then going on a date ☺️
14. What are you going to spend money on next?
- Gasss...a bitches gaslight just went on this morning 🙄
15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed?
- Well I sure hope so
16. Do you think you’ll change in the next three months?
- Maybe?
17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?
- That would have to be my partner in crime
18. The last time you felt broken?
- Yesterday
19. Have you had sex today?
- Not yet but the day is still young 😏
20. Are you starting to realize something?
- I need to keep myself busy with things I enjoy doing
21. Are you in a good mood?
- I’m not in a bad mood 🤷🏼‍♀️
22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks?
- Fuck to the no...well not sober
23. Are your eye’s the same color as your dads?
- Thats a negative ghost rider
24. What do you want right this second?
- To have a glass of whiskey in a nice bath
25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another boy/girl?
- Honestly it depends on the situation
26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color?
- Yepperz
27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?
- Nahh, laughter is hella important
28. What was the last thing that made you laugh?
- The conversation between me and this girl about lube at my job 😂
29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now?
- Yes 🥺
30. Does everyone deserve a second chance?
- Fuck to the no
31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to?
- No I try my best not to hate anyone
32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do?
- Totally 😘
33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?
- No, I’m not perfect
34. Listening to?
- Lover by G Flip
35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore?
- I’m in school so sometimes
36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is?
- She’s at work😘
37. Do you believe in love at first sight?
- I believe in lust at first sight
38. Who did you last call?
- My love
39. Who was the last person you danced with?
- My wife in our living room
40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?
- I always give Heather a goodbye kiss before I leave for work
41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake?
- Honestly I don’t remember
42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today?
- It would be very difficult since they live in a different state
43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush?
- Who hasn’t?
44. Do you tan in the nude?
- I am hella fucking white..when I try to tan I just get burned 😂
45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss?
- No
46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?
- Unfortunately no
47. Who was the last person to call you?
- My lover
48. Do you sing in the shower?
- Of course
49. Do you dance in the car?
- ALL 👏🏻THE 👏🏻TIME👏🏻
50. Ever used a bow and arrow?
- I have but I was not any good at it
51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?
- Um probably on my wedding day
52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?
- Nahh I enjoy them
53. Is Christmas stressful?
- Dealing with my family is stressful
54. Ever eat a pierogi?
- I don’t think I have
55. Favorite type of fruit pie?
- Hmmm...I’ll have to say blueberry
56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were kid?
- I wanted to be a firefighter, police officer, or a professional bank robber lol
57. Do you believe in ghosts?
- Hells to the yes
58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?
- Yep yep yep
59. Taking a vitamin daily?
- I tried but I’m not the greatest at remembering
60. Wear slippers?
- I have some fluffy rainbow slippers 😊
61. Wear a bath robe?
- I don’t wear one but I think I own one
62. What do you wear to bed?
- My birthday suit or a oversized shirt
63. First Concert?
- It was a P!nk concert ☺️
64. Wal-mat, Target or Kmart?
- Wal-mart but with complaining
65. Nike or Adidas?
- Nike
66. Cheetos or Fritos?
- Definitely Cheetos
67. Peanuts or sunflower seeds?
- Umm peanuts
68. Favorite Taylor Swift song?
- Hmm I guess off the top of my head I’ll say the 1
69. Ever take dance lessons?
- Nahh my goofy style just comes natural 😘
70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?
- I don’t want to limit my partner, I’ll support whatever they decide to do and whatever makes them happy
71. Can you curl your tongue?
- Ohh yes I can do a lot of things with my tongue 😘
72. Ever won a spelling bee?
- Nahh
73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?
- Oddly I have 👉🏻👈🏻
74. What is your favorite book?
- Oh that is a difficult question. That is like asking which one is your favorite child..
75. Do you study better with or without music?
- For the most part I study better with music
76. Regularly burn incense?
- Nahh I don’t
77. Ever been in love?
- Only once and still going strong🖤
78. Who would you like to see in concert?
- I really want to see Fletcher in person
79. What was the last concert you saw?
- I went to see King Princess and it was fucking amazing!
80. Hot tea or cold tea?
- It depends on my mood but I love a cup of hot tea with some honey
81. Tea or coffee?
- I have been drinking more tea lately
82. Favorite type of cookie?
- All cookies lol
83. Can you swim well?
- I mean I probably won’t drown but I don’t know about well
84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?
- That’s a negative ghost rider
85. Are you patient?
- For the most part
86. DJ or Band, at a wedding?
- Bands are groovy but I’m going to have to go with a DJ
87. Ever won a contest?
- I believe so
88. Ever have plastic surgery?
- Nope, I’m poor
89. Which are better black or green olives?
- Umm black?
90. Opinions on sex before marriage?
- Eh, I sure didn’t fucking wait
91. Best room for fireplace?
- Living room
92. Do you want to get married?
- Well I’m already married sooo
2 notes · View notes
thomas-j-nook · 2 years
Text
Tired today. I woke up super early due to pain and due to my rabbit just being a rabbit. He gets hyper and runs laps around his cage. he has a hutch coming and will go in the living room when it comes. He’s only in the bedroom now because his cage is kinda broken. So if the cats did jump on it it could fall apart. Which will wake me up if he’s in my room. His hutch comes very soon. I’m still in a lot of pain. I did take medication but it cuts it down like 50% and it was 150% lol so it does help a little. 
I was also late this morning which was not mine or Petes fault. I was leaving and my mom texted me asking is we could bring my dad to the neurologist and pick him up and bring him to work because they only have one car. Then she went on to complain about my cousins husbands funeral and who from the family showed up and who stayed for what amount of time and what they said and what they didn’t say. I didn’t go. it’s a 3 hour ride and with everything going on i’m not adding a funeral to my stress.
I’m not answering my grandmothers calls because she’s telling me to fuck off lol. She’s in the hospital for some reason. We don’t know why. Only my aunt does. and my grandmother is calling me demanding i come get her and i’m like “I legally cant. you need to stay there and get care” and then she yells at me which i know is her being confused from dementia. The hospital is no help. I call and ask for the nurses station and they transfer me to her room. So she called me 4 times saying she was discharged and she was able to come home she said odd fellows does not due transportation after 5pm so I could have to come get her. I know she has dementia So i call twice to be like “yo is she really discharged or what” and they could not tell me and when they transfered me to the nursing station they did it to her room. and she picks up yelling. and i’m like ughhhh. So she’s calling me on the hour telling me she’s being held against her will and she will call the police and the fbi and i’m sick of having to be the one to calm her down from this. It’s even more frustrating because she listens better to me and my brother but we don’t know what is going on. So like i can’t like be like “remember your here because________ and you need to stay here until ______. shes like “Why am i here?” and i’m like “i have no idea man” and i called my aunts twice and my brother had called multiple people and they are refusing communication with us. They have issues with my parents but I have not done or said anything to cause an issue or add fuel to the fire. I’m very tired. I wanted to stay home BUT i feel like i just would have slept all day which would have mit hard for me to sleep tonight. SO if nothing else i’m hoping getting up and coming here will tire me out. 
I’m honestly a little sad today too. I kinda forgot Caleigh and Taylor were moving out of state. We’ve reconnected this summer. I knew the entire summer they planned on moving but with everything going on it didn’t hit me until this morning when i got the text to meet up with them before they left. and i was like shit. That started quick and ended quick. It was nice reconnecting because like when i saw them before we got along but they were getting paid to be around me lol. I got comfortable with them especially how Caleigh did home support for me for a while. reconnecting was just cool just because i did get close to caleigh when she did home supports but at the end of the day i knew it was her job. lol. So it was just nice to be invited because they wanted me there like she obvously didn’t mind me at program but like she didn’t really have a much of a choice. lol SO i was like “she’s just being friendly with me because thats how she feeds her kids” lol. I get it. I didn’t work at Kmart because i enjoyed putting shoes on 90 year old men. I worked there to feed myself lol. But i do think she genually didn’t mind working with me and enjoyed her job most days. 
So yeah like i said i’ve known about them moving for months but this morning i was like FUCK when i remembered. It’s all goo though. I don’t often get invited places and i don’t do like dinner with friends so its super cool when i get to go to dawns house and they are there. It actually feels like i’m hanging out with friends which has not happened in so long. Like an entire group of people. just crazy.
BUt yeah we are not doing much. Pete is driving my dad around and answering calls from my grandmother since pete is the only who she is not mean too at the moment lol. We can all go to hell and get the police called on us but not Pete. I’ll never understands Petes relationship with my grandmother. i mean i’m glad it’s there but anytime she needs anything at all she calls pete. Out of everyone in the family. She has his number written down beside her bed. It’s always been like this and i do think it’s because when she did live in an apartment Pete and i did do a lot of her care. Pete would take her to walmart and help her shop and bring her home and put her food away. he would do her cat box and vacuum her rugs and take her trash to the dumpster. He shoveled in the winter, ect. I mean before off fellows she once called pete at work to let him know she had an emergency because her cat lost a toy under the couch and the cat would not stop crying for it. It’s like 9am and shes telling pete to come as soon as he can it’s urgent. and he stopped by after work got the toy and left. But it’s always Pete. She will call Pete before anyone in the family and she never forgets Petes name. She has called me before. and said “Ohh your not Pete” hung up and called Pete and were sitting next to each other. I was jealous at first. If like spend two hours cleaning her already clean apartment and dusting and vacuming and Pete would come pick me up and walk threw the door and she’d say “Thank god your here pete. She did a lousy job” she does that though, because her dementia. My brother cooks her food at odd fellows and she will pull him aside and tell him her lunch was horrible and they need to hire real chefs when my brother cooked it lmao. 
She has been having issues recently bad and it does stress me. Just like at the wedding she didn’t know who anyone was or where she was. As we go to leave she ask’s me if Alana was going to show up. i’m like “yeah she married kris. She’s wearing the big white wedding dress” She also knew who calliope was last Christmas Like she asked about her all the time and now we don’t give photo’s to her because she gets so confused. I am glad that my brother did sit with her about two years ago and labeled  the back off all her old photos. SO like her grandmother and her mom and her cousins and siblings because now she looks at a photo and has no idea who it is. It started off really slow. She was diagnosed like 6 years ago. And everyone around me was like “oh no” and i’m like “she’s fine.” id go over and help her out and she started forgetting things but i expected that. I never expected it would get the point where she could no longer recognize me some day. Everyone told me it would happen and they saw her decline and i didn’t see it. I saw her good then horrible. I think i chose not to listen and not to see the decrease in skills and memories. I’m like she’s good. It’s a huge decrease. I took her out last summer to tabers so she could watch kids play mini golf and get a hamburgers and she was walking fine with her walker and even asked me to take her to big lots and she walked for over an hour. SO i’m like “see she’s fine” and at Kris’s wedding she could barely stand up or walk with a walker. She didn’t know where she was. We can not take her out anymore and it sucks. Because covid I didn’t see her for like 2 years. I could not take her out and now that i can she’s lost the ability to be taken out. It’s just sad because i has all these plans to do things with her and take her hour and go for rides and get ice cream and do the things she likes and covid came. So she could not leave and now i won’t take her out because the confusion lasts for days. 
it’s a difficult situation for sure. trying to keep my head up. LIke i said me also not being involved with her care sucks because im the one she calls asking questions. I’m the one tha takes the time to explain things to her. I’m theo ne that writes out 106 christmas cards every holiday for her. Which takes 6 hours btw because she adds like her pharmacist and the nice sales clerk that helped her at staples once. He laminated her social security card which is technically illegal lol i guess it’s tampering with government stuff kind of like money. Pete gets a card. She always adds a gift card to Petes card and no one else lmao. If she gives him cash we bring it to odd fellows and out it back into her account lol. But yeah we will all open cards from her. She makes he write one to myself lol and we all open and there is cash or something in only Petes card. We just out the cash amount of the gift card into her account at odd fellows. lol LIke if she gives him a $50 dunkin card we add $50 cash to her account there. 
Just dealing with a lot of family stuff. I have settled into my new apartment. I need to unpack with everything going on i’ve been more focused on coming home, cooking and watching my t.v. Also Pete is trash and getting stuff done or knowing what needs to be done So like i take care of the cars registration and inspection and i had to transfer over renter insurance. He won’t do it on his own or think to do it on his own. I did the change address and all that fun stuff. Yesterday though i did wake up in a bad mood and i had some issues and i ended up getting really upset and i went back to bed and i woke up to a clean house. SO miracles do happen. Not really lol he just didn’t want me to wake up and continue to rage around the house. I woke up and he jumps out of my spot on the couch and hands me the remote. I’m like “Your god damn right you did that” lol. I basically run the entire household lol. Like i’ll send e mails from pete and i do the banking and i do all his shit. i even help with shared living sometimes. 
It’s actually a great mix because i can run an entire household. i can do the banking and pay the bills and stay and plan the meals. And pete does the social stuff. I deal with the reading and writing and he deals with the talking and communication. I do have to step in sometimes with Pete because he would buy a piece of literal shit from someone if they told him it had health benifits. He also helped me do groceries monday and i about died. He knows we are a great value family. I spent way more them usual and it’s because Pete grabs the first thing he see’s. he wants apples so he grabs the $13 organic bag of them. Same with the rabbit though. We feed him hay, pellets and greens and Pete will buy all organic greens for him like boc choy and shit and i’m like like i can’t even afford organic for myself pete. Pete also always tells at me for not rinsing my produce but jokes on him I’ve cooked 95% of his meals the past 14 years and he’s still good lol. I will never wash fruits and vegtables. I’m fine with water, I have texture issues like i can touch an apple, not a wet apple. I can touch a coffee mug, not a wet coffee mug. he does dishes. i will sometimes when we have the sponges with the long handles and i wear gloves lol. 
0 notes
boundlesshart · 4 years
Text
how royal succession works in Almyra + Other Things about almyra that’s been rattling in my head since that nintendo dream interview laid waste on my crops
hi, so after reading M’s @ladamedepique​ drabble about a concubine war kid getting kmarted, i realized that what i actually want to write is the Everything i’ve been thinking about since this nintendo dream interview came out back in march. so i did. it’s 2am and im hungry.
i realize that it’s been a while, so the summary of that interview’s impact on my claude headcanons is “my handcrafted claude backstory that i had to write myself bc intsys decided fuck claude is now irreversibly fucked by the introduction of a bunch of half-siblings he had to be rivals with.” if you ever catch yourself wondering why this is such a mess, well because that’s exactly what this is! this is all subject to change, it’s same kind of “haphazard and bizarrely long half-baked headcanon report” that my dlc thought train was. i’ve changed my mind at least 20 times during this process i will change it again
i’d like to thank zotero for holding all of my journal articles and pdfs on the ottomans and their succession system, and also magnificent century og and kosem, while not being totally historically accurate, for being a fun soap opera to give me some visuals to work with in my head. i now have a positive understanding of what claude’s shitty little beard could realistically look like, which is a gift that i never thought i would have.
Almyran Succession
All of the king’s children, regardless of if they were born in or out of wedlock, is considered a legitimate prince or princess. This is pretty much the only title that they can expect to have, as they and their mothers cannot inherit any lands, titles or wealth that would have been passed to them from their own families. Almyran property law aims to avoid partitioning property between multiple heirs for the sake of maintaining the family’s financial stability. The throne of Almyra works under the same principle, which had led to the introduction, legalization, and practice of open succession.
Open succession, despite its potential to be cruel, is viewed as a necessary step to ensure that the throne would only be held by strong leaders chosen by the people (”people” ending up being the higher-ranking officials that would benefit from a specific child’s ascension). If they proved to be lacking, they would simply be deposed of and replaced. 
What determines who becomes the next ruler of Almyra is not whether a child is the oldest of all the children, but if they and their allies have the political acumen to not only claim kingship but keep it, fighting off their rival brothers and sisters.
All sons and unmarried daughters are eligible to rule Almyra. By law is not only the next ruler’s right but duty to remove other potential heirs to secure their right to rule and the stability of their reign. Generally upon a ruler’s ascension to the throne, their brothers will be killed and their sisters married off or killed if they threaten their siblings’ rule. Exceptions have been made in the past, but they are few and far in between and have led to succession crises down the road. 
The previous ruler’s choice for an heir is usually accepted after their death, and ideal for minimizing the interregnum period. Even so, it doesn’t guarantee that the heir will be able to keep the throne.
Ok, but where do the kids come from?
Rulers of Almyra are allowed to have multiple spouses, but they usually only marry for political purposes.
The vast majority of children are mothered or fathered by concubines with no background of political power, which is preferred. Princes and princesses are allowed to have children once they leave the palace (to prove that they can have them), but if they have too many they may be considered a threat to the king and dealt with appropriately.
I think the one mother-one child rule would have been in place here, not necessarily as a law but as a rule enforced by other spouses and concubines, as well as the ruler’s mother or father.
Princes and princesses aren’t dropping like flies, and murdering them without having the law on your side is considered treason of the highest order. They’re still aware of their competition and fear being murdered when one of their siblings takes the thrones, so few end up becoming friends.
Children are ultimately their mother’s or father’s responsibility. They are expected to guide them through their education and follow them to their provincial post when they are old enough, setting them up for success and paving their path to the throne. King and Queen Dowagers have been incredibly influential in Almyran history and support their children by representing them politically and managing their spouses and concubines. 
Ok, whatever, just tell me what’s relevant to Claude:
Ibrahim, Claude’s father, became the king of Almyra only after 5 year civil war between himself and his two remaining brothers. He got to the throne first and is still feared for the ruthless execution of even his youngest brothers and sisters.
In all, Ibrahim has had 2 wives and 12 concubines, and he has fathered 10 sons and 6 daughters. A few died to childhood illnesses but most made it to at least 13 years old. He’s a doting father and cares for their well-being, though only when he happens to see them. Though he was a constant presence in Claude’s life, his half-siblings usually only saw him during holidays.
No one in Almyra knows that Tiana is the daughter of Duke Riegan, for all they know she’s a Fódlaner that King Ibrahim brought back with him after a short border strife with the Leicester Alliance. Obviously she goes by another name in Almyra, and here is where I think I’m going to bring back the first name I had for her, Desdemona. Suck it, intsys. She wasn’t liked when she first came due to being from Fódlan, and was accused of witchcraft when Ibrahim married her and devoted himself to her at the expense of his other wives as concubines. As the herd of children and concubines thinned, Tiana’s strong personality and battle prowess garnered her respect among the top officials of the Almyran court and even her enemies.
In Fódlan Year 1175, rebels infiltrate the palace walls and kill over a dozen people, from palace servants to princes and princesses. In the moment it was believed to be part of a revolt that was ongoing in the capital at the time and carried out by rebels storming the palace walls and stealing and killing whatever came in their way. After an investigation, it was discovered that that was just a cover up for.... a noble Almyran house trying to make a power grab through either an older son or with their own heir? I’ve been working out the details on this for months and I still don’t have them ironed out don’t look at me. It ends with a couple of older half-sibs dying but more importantly Claude’s older and younger brother dying and Claude nearly dying himself, only to survive with the Crest of Riegan. I imagine that there have been instances before hinted at him having the Crest of Riegan, but it was this incident that confirmed it for Tiana. 
These are the notable royal family members, or the ones I’ve spent at least one second thinking of:
King Ibrahim II of Almyra: Claude’s dad, born Fódlan year 1131 so 19 when he ascends the throne. He is feared but respected, brutal to his enemies, firm with his allies... but you’d be surprised by how easygoing he actually is with friends and family. He’s young at heart and energetic, even laughing at jokes made at his expense, but only in very close company. He loves writing poetry, especially to Tiana, and he frequently sends her love letters so that one can be read out to her every morning and evening when her mail is given to her. Relishes the thrill of battle. Nader introduced him to kumis back when they were boys and to this day Ibrahim regularly drinks a glass each night, claiming it makes him stronger.
There’s a tradition in the royal family that all princes and princesses must learn a trade in case that they fall into misfortune. Ibrahim enjoys goldsmithing when he is alone, a good distraction from his thoughts. Claude’s earring is part of a set given to his mother, crafted by his father as a gift.
Tiana von Riegan/Desdemona: Claude’s mom, born Fódlan year 1135. Claude calls her a warrior goddess and a demon queen that would laugh at his expense, I imagine that she’s in that “dead serious but good humored about it” boat like Claudedad, but less sappy about it. A tough but loving mother, she was very involved in her children’s upbringing and did her best to secure their place in the royal family. She doesn’t teach any of her kids the Fódlanguage because she was distancing herself from That, but Claude is able to convince her to help him learn (though she was reluctant about it and limited their lessons greatly, forcing him to teach himself mostly). She has firmly decided to never return to Fódlan, but a cup of Leicester Cortania is her guilty pleasure. These days Tiana spends her time at her husband’s side in Maragheh, keeping up with her training.
Two older half-brothers: So Claude’s endings have him as heir to the throne without a mention of rivals, but part of me feels like that’s too simple for Claude considering he just up and walked out of there 7 years ago so here we are, two rivals. They’re probably early to mid 30s at this point and have one or two small children of their own. I don’t know their names yet, but my initial ideas are a “nice” brother cool calculated pushing up glasses kind of dude that is actually a huge dick and a chad dudebro who’s just trying to distance himself from these bad vibes.
If I had to give them trades, nice brother likes to fish and sails for pleasure (he governs a coastal province) and chad brother carves wooden thumbrings. 
Orhan: Claude’s older brother, born Fódlan Year 1160. He was conceived months before Tiana went to Almyra (born 5 months after she arrived), so his parentage has been in doubt from day 1. I imagine him as having low self-esteem since he was believed to be a full-blooded Fódlaner, discriminated against in a similar way or worse than what the rest of his siblings went through. Historians would later debate whether or not he was actually Ibrahim’s son.... but we’re not historians, and Orhan was definitely his son. Died in the FY1175 uprising at the age of 15.
No idea what he looked like, he just happened to not look like his parents. His favorite food was salted cod, but he was rarely able to get it. Orhan enjoyed playing the violin.
Claude/Khalid: You know him, you love him, born Fódlan Year 1162 under another name. He’s the only kid that ended up getting the Crest of Riegan, and after one too many accidents where that crest ended up proccing, he’s been accused of practicing witchcraft like his mother. I think this would be a better like, concrete thing for the Almyrans to fixate on rather than a general “you’re half-Fódlan rahhh” and I think it would definitely go with Claude talking about how he was constantly fighting and explaining himself to get out of trouble.
If I’m going with the “kids can only inherit from the ruler of Almyra”, then I’m gonna have to figure out how Claude fits into this. His first move is to probably bullshit a loophole about how actually the Dukedom of Riegan doesn’t exist anymore and I may have destroyed Failnaught after the final battle so technically I didn’t really inherit anything that would give me an edge in Almyran politics. :). Ibrahim is pissed at Claude for going to Fódlan in the first place and getting caught up in a war and he definitely did not sign off on Nader bringing Almyran troops into a war that they have no business being involved in. The first thing Ibrahim does when Claude returns to Maragheh is shout at him and ground him to his apartment in the palace. And then proceed to assign Claude to a governmental post so that he’s out of his sight.
As an aside, I imagine that when Ibrahim dies and Claude rises to the throne, he deliberately delays his coronation so that it coincides with the Almyran New Year. It;s that kind of inconvenient dick move that he would delight in making bc symbolism.
You know what he looks like, in terms of food he strays away from sugary sweet stuff and towards meat and cheese. I’d like to think that he gains a genuine interest in gardening (like, beyond just cultivating poisonous plants as a cover for “gardening”) during his time in Fódlan and brings back different seedlings and scions for grafting back to Almyra. 
Mehmet and Rahimah: Twins, born Fódlan Year 1164. Ok so basically I kind of wanted a dead sibling that was around Cyril and Lysithea’s age for the Drama of it (bc I thought of Claude looking at Cyril and thinking of his brother and immediately went “That hurts. Let’s do it”). But I ALSO thought what if Claude had a little sister, and then I ALSO thought what if Claude has a new full-blooded sibling that got conceived during the five year war, like the shittiest surprise. I’ve combined all those ideas into the twins.
First of all, they have more function than personality. Mehmet only exists to die during the uprising, but I’m starting to like Rahimah bc like... she literally loses most of her brothers including her twin, and then Claude up and leaves her for Fódlan (a place she has little connection to, regardless of her mother). Her only remaining sibling is gone for years, misses seven birthdays, her wedding with an Almyran general, the birth of her first child and the announcement of her second... like, by the time Claude comes back to Almyra she hates his guts and you know what? She’s right! I imagine Rahimah angry, but also grasping for literally any kind of deep and long-lasting relationship at this point. She loves her kids fiercely, she loves her husband, and even though they have their struggles she's still very close to her mom. Fuck her no-show brother Khalid, and fuck Fódlan for taking him away from her.
No idea what Mehmet looks like, like I said he only exists to die. Rahimah is shorter than Claude at maybe 5′4, round-faced and carrying herself gracefully. She’s lactose intolerant but she bears the pain for the sake of eating ice cream, and her husband goes to great lengths to get the ice for her. Likes to sing and dance with her son Ömer.
21 notes · View notes