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#i really didn’t think it would affect me this much lol
plussizeficchick · 5 months
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The Weekend | Eren x Chubby!Reader
Summary; Eren and Mikasa have been “dating” and while reader originally had no interest in him, the way Mikasa’s been acting sure does make him look more appealing ;)
Warnings; Smut, “cheating”(they’re not explicitly boyfriend and girlfriend), College AU! P in V, cunnilingus, cum eating, slight breeding kink, Mikasa and Historia are pick me’s and terrible friends lol. Loosely based on the song by SZA(might make a part 2 idkk, not proofread) PART 2
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It was a bit difficult making friends at your University. For the most part, everyone had their set friend group so you knew it wouldn’t be easy finding people to hang out with during this new semester. 
That’s why you were glad to meet Mikasa and Historia. 
They were both in your Sociology class at Eldia University and they were having a bit of trouble when you offered help. They were nice, though they could be a bit catty. They introduced you to their other friends so you thought they were nice enough, but you noticed a change when they were around the guys. 
They would make offhand comments about your figure, your outfits, sometimes your attitude. It was off putting, to put it lightly. So, you’re thicker than the two of them, so what? It shouldn’t affect them. And while they may be comfortable suffering in silence, you were definitely going to speak up when you felt like it.
You were certain it was jealousy. The way they spluttered when you asked them to elaborate, the way they flustered when you mentioned that maybe they just couldn’t pull off plus-sized the way you could, had you feeling vindicated. And the way the boys always seemed to laugh at your jokes had them blatantly envious.
It was a bit pathetic to witness sometimes, the way guys would defend you from their “playful jabs” had thinly veiled sneers etching onto their faces.
— —
It was clear to everyone Mikasa had a thing for Eren and while you thought he was attractive, you could see him being more suited for her. And if the way he casually draped his arm around her shoulder meant anything, you’d say he thought the same. You were sure that she was his type, so she didn’t have anything to worry about.
That’s why it was such a shock when Historia told you she’d slept with him.
“I mean, if he really wanted her, they’d be together already, y’know.” She casually dropped the bomb when it was just the two of you. She was so blasé about it, applying her lipgloss as she made you promise not to say anything, throwing in a thinly veiled threat, “I mean, it’s not like anyone would believe you anyway. Plus, you don’t want to be by yourself, right?” 
It wasn’t so much the threat that made you keep your mouth closed, honestly, you had more morals than that, it was more so Mikasa’s attitude toward the hypothetical.
Throughout your entire “friendship” with the two girls, they’d always seen you as a non-factor. When you’d go to parties, they’d flirt with whomever showed even the slightest bit of interest in you and whenever you’d bring it up, they’d just gaslight you. “If he was really interested, then he wouldn’t have gotten distracted, would he?” And for the longest time, you had explained away their behavior because, yeah, you don’t want a guy that’ll easily stray, but, fuck. If it didn’t piss you off.
You’d originally wanted to tell her in a roundabout way, asking how she would feel if one of her friends were interested in Eren. Her answer, however, caused an unfamiliar feeling in your stomach. “Like who? Historia doesn’t see him like that and no offense, but you know Eren wouldn’t like someone like you.” That got you to thinking.
They think I’m a joke.
You wanted to tell Mikasa. You wanted to tell her when she spent nights crying to you and Historia about how Eren doesn’t open up to her anymore, how she felt he was slipping away.
You wanted to tell her what Eren really thought of her. The way he spent some nights ranting about how he felt obligated to date her, that sometimes he thinks of her as a fucking nuisance, like a snake that keeps coiling around his neck, suffocating. The times he’d wished she’d just take a fucking hint and get that he didn’t see a future with her.
You wanted to tell her about all the times Eren flirted with you, told you not to listen to any of her comments because, yeah, she could never pull off looking as good as you do. The times when he’d purposefully walk behind you, gripping at your soft waist and brushing his clothed cock against your ass, making sure you can really feel the length of him.
You wanted to tell her that even though she might be “dating” him, he was always coming back to your dorm late at night, hiking up his shirt around your waist and pressing his face into your chubby pussy, tonguing at your walls and pulling wave after wave of pleasure from you. That even though Historia may have had him that one time, he’s with you damn near every weekend, playing house.
— —
You’re on all fours, your back arched perfectly to make the glide of Eren’s cock in your sopping cunt that much easier. “Fuck, baby. You’re g’nna make me cum.” He grits out, teeth clenched. You’re squeezing him like a vice, your pussy creaming around his dick so deliciously he can taste the orgasm on his tongue.
He’ll never get tired of this, he’ll never get over how perfect your pussy molds for his cock, the velvety feeling of your cunt clenching around him. He’s panting, sweat dripping from his forehead before landing on the deep arch in your back, trickling down. Fuck, he just wants to devour you all over again.
“‘Ren, g’nna cum.” You moan for him, fuck, your voice is so fucking cute, the way your voice gets all high and whiny, has his cock throbbing inside you. “Cum f’me, pretty. Make a mess f’me.” He groans out. 
It’s embarrassing, the way your pussy squelches as he fucks into you. He fashions your hair into a makeshift ponytail before pulling, bringing your back flush against his chest. His hands are everywhere, groping and pawing at your soft flesh. 
He picks up the tempo of his thrusts, cock slamming into your warm, gushy center. He’s whining in your ear about how good you feel, how perfect you are for him, but it’s not until you hear him mumble about fucking a baby into you that you cum around his cock for the nth time that day. Your orgasm triggers his and before long his cock is pulsing as he fills you full of him.
You’re both panting as you slowly come down from your highs, Eren slowly removing his cock from your abused cunt and the sight of your poor battered pussy has Eren feeling a bit.. peckish.
You’re too busy catching your breath to notice Eren kissing along your spent body, only letting out a surprised yelp when you feel his hands spreading your cheeks and licking a bold stripe up your center. 
You gasp as he eats you out like a man starved, slurping up your combined essence before sucking on your clit. His hands grope the flesh of your ass, occasionally leaving a bruising spank to each side. 
He’s practically making out your cunt, tonguing at the soft flesh and pressing wet kisses to your clit before lapping at the bundle of nerves.
It doesn’t take long before another orgasm washes over you, soaking Eren’s face in your arousal. When he finally comes up for air, he’s pulling you into a wet kiss, the taste of you dancing on his tongue.
He pulls back slightly, pressing a quick peck to your cheek before getting up, moving to get the necessary items for aftercare. He cleans you up, dresses you in one of his favorite shirts and slides on a pair of boxers for himself before sidling next to you. He pulls you flush against his chest, pressing sweet kisses to your forehead as he traces shapes down your back.
This is why you always feel slightly bad for Mikasa. You know she craves for this level of intimacy with Eren and you know that her heart will break when he breaks the news of your relationship to her on Monday.
*sigh* If only she didn’t feel like a 9-5.
— —
Taglist: @xogabbiexo @kinq-sleazee @dabilovesme @blkchxrryblyss @tenyaiidasslut @luna-indigoduh @bookwormsenpai @bl--ankhaeji @thicksimpx @namjoonswifeyy @nasty-quillz @haikyutiehoe @musicisme333 @unsatisfiedanddisappointed @celi-xxmoon
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kinopio-writes · 2 months
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Hi! Would you be willing to write something for Adam with a sensitive reader?
Everyone knows that he is loud-mouthed jerk, even reader, and she loves him regardless, but one day he crosses the line and says something particularly mean that makes her cry. Like REAL mean. To the point that he pauses because he did not think before speaking (or, well, less than usual lol)
I'm happy with whatever format you feel like using! Thank you!
A/N: I will be more than delighted to write that for you. But would you excuse me for a moment? AHHHHHHDISJDIOEOFJSKXJND—I’m sorry; I love this idea so much. Reading ‘Adam with a sensitive reader’ got me hooked instantly. But I’ll go over that in the headcanons, along with the general stuff. And I’ll add a oneshot at the end that plays the exact scenario of Adam taking it too far.
Holy sh!t. I made it so that the reader being sensitive is their greatest but also weakest point and it turned out pretty angsty. Has a bit of hurt/comfort, though. Did I go overboard? Maybe. That’s why it took so long. Sorry, anon.
Words: 2,328 (edited the end a bit because it didn’t sit right with me)
Warnings: Sex is mentioned (only a bit, surprisingly), Angst, Adam being Adam
———
Adam w/ a Sensitive!Reader
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• ha, this man is also sensitive himself
• well, sensitive about himself
• he feels his own emotions strongly, so he’s not the caring, easily able to pick up on other’s feelings and empathize type of sensitive
• I’m also pretty sure he has rejection sensitivity
• you, on the other hand, are on the opposite end of the spectrum compared to Adam
• so you experience other people’s emotions just as strongly as yours
• you easily know what makes someone tick
• you’re selfless
• you’re able to admit your mistakes and apologize
• you’re respectful and actively listen to people when they talk about themselves
• you don’t push people down to make yourself seem better
• you try to make everyone feel good and comfortable
• you’re everything he isn’t
• because you fit in Heaven perfectly
• you deserve to be there
• and Adam knows that he doesn’t belong (subconsciously at least)
• you’re able to draw people in just for being yourself
• and he’s envious of it
• so he demeans you and is snarky about everything you do, and every time people give you praise or affection, he tries to divert the attention to himself or just stares at you with utter hatred from afar
• although all of that is just when he hasn’t even had a conversation with you
• after a while of being around you, he’ll cling to you because you give him the reassurance and validation he oh-so craves
• you acknowledge all of the things he puts his worth to
• heck, you hang out with him—you sometimes even initiate it—willingly, and you’re genuinely interested in everything he has to say
• but he‘ll only hang out with you where no one recognizes you (so you don’t get all the attention)
• terrible transition here, but he notices that you mimic people’s expressions often
• he definitely makes fun of you for it
• and also mocks you
• up until he realizes that you do the same thing to him, too
• which is fine and all, if only you didn’t do that when he’s upset
• well, you mimic him when he’s joyous as well, but he (already subconsciously) expects you to. I mean, why wouldn’t you? He’s fucking hilarious!
• so you copying his negative emotions just stands out more
• and he…doesn’t like it
• that’s only really what he doesn’t like about you
• and the fact that you hog all the attention
• and the fact that people see you as perfect…
• buuut what happens when he gets to see a new side of you that isn’t exactly upholding that image?
———
Your phone lit up from your bedside table, brightening your otherwise dark room along with the soft glow of your halo. You only moved your eyes to the light, not wanting your tears to spill and dampen your pillows.
You had an inkling as to who was texting you this late—if the fact that your phone lighting up several times in the span of 5 minutes had anything to say.
When the texts stopped pouring in after a few seconds, you heavily sighed, wings ruffling. You resisted the urge to rub your face as you went to grab your phone.
HEY (2:34) HEY (2:34) HEY (2:34) ARE YOU UP? (2:35) I’M BORED (2:35) GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE (2:36) IF YOU’RE UP (2:37) ARE YOU? (2:38) DID I TELL YOU THAT BITCH WITH THE HUGE TITS GOT FIRED TODAY? (2:39)
Figured. Of course, it was Adam. He was the only person you knew who’d be awake at this ungodly hour. And the only person you knew who’d disturb your peace if it meant curing anything that ailed him. Which was now about boredom, it seemed.
You read a few of his texts displayed on your lock screen before tapping one of the notifications and opening the app, scanning the rest of the unread messages.
Adam was going on about ‘that bitch with the huge tits’—her name was Tiffany, you were sure—and how she was rumored to have slept with an archangel to assume higher authority. He also went on to complain about how he didn’t have the chance to bed her anymore since she was basically deemed an outcast and that he couldn’t be seen with someone like her.
You frowned, not believing any of it, but you didn’t have time to think about it enough when he began typing again.
SO YOU’RE AWAKE (2:43)
You barely finished reading the new message when another one popped up.
DON’T IGNORE ME BITCH (2:43)
You frowned deeper, quick to type out a reply.
i’m not (2:43) i was just reading your texts (2:43) don’t worry (2:43) i’ll be there soon (2:44)
When he stopped typing, you placed your phone back on the nightstand, sitting up on your bed as you carefully wiped away your teary eyes. You hugged yourself for a moment, wings functioning as a cocoon while a hand tugged on your hair.
Today had been draining—both mentally and emotionally. Just like the day before, and the day before that. But you didn’t want to think about it, lest you start to cry some more and smear your face with tears this time. What mattered was that everyone was back on their feet again.
Since you didn’t bother changing into your sleepwear when you got home, you only checked your face in the mirror to see if your eyes were puffy or not. You then took in deep breaths, holding up your drooping wings before putting up a charming smile.
You couldn’t stay in the bathroom for long, quickly leaving to tread the path to Adam’s.
•••
“BOO!” Adam’s masked face suddenly peeked from the corner of his hallway, earning an indescribable scream from you as you jerked back. He burst out laughing, brows creased in confusion but also amusement. He couldn’t even make fun of you for getting scared. “What the—what the fuck was that scream?”
Recovering rather quickly as you blinked, you only smiled at him. You were expecting him to wait for you on his couch as his front door was left unlocked, but you weren’t complaining; his action took away any drowsiness you just had.
When Adam didn’t hear you laugh with him, his laughter subsided as he opened his eyes to look at your face. He raised his brows and placed the back of his hands on his hips. “What’s up with you?”
Shit. There was no way Adam was seeing through you.
“Nothing; I just love hearing you laugh.” You heard a tiny squeak in response. “Anyway, what did you make me come over for? Surely not just to scare me.” You moved past Adam and tightly crossed your arms, entering his spacious living room.
“Pshh, fuck no. You’re so easy to spook. Though that was a first. Didn’t know you could hit high notes, (Name).”
You didn’t know what to say to his…compliment? And sort of insult? Was it really either of them? Should you thank him? But in a sarcastic way? No, you weren’t known for being sarcastic, so he might think you were being genuine and look at you weirdly. And it would also seem highly egotistical.
Not as if Adam had much to say about that…
You tugged at your hair when you caught yourself with those thoughts. Shit, that’s so rude! You can’t think that! You shouldn’t think that!
You settled on an awkward chuckle, making yourself appear smaller as you averted your eyes to his TV space.
It was different, certainly. The modular couch pieces were rearranged into a pit sectional. And it looked as though he had chucked a bunch of pillows and one large blanket as an afterthought. It appeared messy, but at least it looked cozy.
“What’s this?”
“Hm? Oh, well, since you were taking your sweet ass time coming here, I thought to switch things up a bit.” You flinched when his head appeared right on your shoulder. “What’d ya think?”
“It looks super comfy.” Adam wore a goofy grin behind you as you walked closer to the area and noticed that he already prepared snacks on the low table. “Is this a way to say you wanna do a movie marathon?”
“You know it, baby.” He flew past you and landed on the sofa, patting the space beside him with a smile you just couldn’t reject.
•••
Heaven’s natural light beginning to peek through the open windows indicated that it was already dawn. Thank goodness you didn’t have work today.
You two—or rather, Adam—had settled on watching the film series, Die Hard. Every single one. You didn’t mind, but you didn’t understand why Adam invited you over if you two were just going to rewatch the film series for the eighth time.
He had also been pretty immersed in the large screen in front of him, so he hadn’t attempted to converse with you ever since the first movie started. In all honesty, he could have just watched them all by himself.
But you didn’t question it. This time was the same as the last seven, after all. You always concluded that maybe he just wanted someone to watch movies with, no talking necessary. Even if the no-talking part sounded a bit out of character.
Was it though? Because he did that quite often. For instance, he constantly brought you along to whatever mundane errands he had to do during the weekdays and never really talked with you unless he found something cool and pointed it out.
Although, the earlier times you tagged along with him on his errands, he kept yapping his mouth off about the ‘totally awesome’ things he does. He talked about music, his own albums, his band, women, sex, and himself as the first-ever man.
As time went on, however, the talking was replaced with silence. You wondered if he just ran out of things to say or if he found it unnecessary to talk anymore.
You also sometimes wondered what was going through his head when he thought you didn’t see him glancing at you while he was doing something he believed was boring.
The sound of Adam’s stomach rumbling broke you out of your train of thought.
You both looked at each other blankly as if either of you were to blame.
He blinked to break the eye contact between you. “(Name), I’m hungry.”
You snorted, facing ahead. “You ate all of our snacks before the first movie even finished.”
“Don’t blame me.” He hugged the pillow he held tighter. “I’m still fuckin’ hungry, though.”
You hummed as you reached for your pocket. “Do you want me to—oh. I…I forgot my phone.” You frowned. You never forget to bring your belongings.
Adam merely stared at you, unblinking.
You averted your eyes and held your legs tighter. “Uhm, We could get delivery if you want. Can you lend me your phone?”
“Oh, yeah, sure.” He casually tossed you the device before laying on his back and looking up at you. “I’m down for anything.”
His phone hit your knee before you could catch it, silently landing on the cushions. “Are you sure?” You picked it up, opened his unlocked phone, and stared at his basic home screen.
He didn’t really use his phone that often to know that it could be changed. He only really used it to fetch one-night stands or occasional dates, text, play music aloud, look at outdated memes, take random blurry photos, and right now, order delivery.
“Totally.” His crow’s feet displayed on his mask as he puffed out his cheeks.
“Because last time you said that, you didn’t like what I had to pick.”
“That’s because the 5 ʼn 2 is so fucking overrated!” he suddenly started to complain. Your wings ruffled. “Jeez, I swear, every fuckin’ time I take a chick out and ask her what her favorite eatery is, basic bitches always go, ‘Oh, bREaD & fIsH, ceRTAinLy’ or ‘bReAD & FiSh’S a cLAsSIC’” He used his hand as a puppet to imitate their words before waving it. “Like, helloooo? Can’t you see the joint that’s literally on the other side of the street’s a hundred times superior? It’s cheaper, too, unlike Bread & Fish. Overpriced ass. You get me, right—?”
“Then you pick!” Adam jumped at your volume, and your eyes widened upon noticing yourself. You quickly gave back his phone as you turned your face away from him, and he slowly took it with a weird look.
“Shit, chill, (Name). The fuck’s up your ass?” He kept his gaze on you before turning to his phone.
While he was serious about his opinions of your bland tastes, he didn’t think it was that personal. Your preferences were the same as everyone else and that was boring. He was just being honest. And you usually didn’t take the things he said that seriously.
“Adam, I’m sorry,” you spoke up after a moment of silence and ran a hand through your hair. “I didn’t mean to yell at you.”
“ʼs not a problem.” He was still a bit weirded out, but he was willing to shrug it off.
You insisted, however, “I mean it. I’m not mad at you.”
“Okay…?” he muttered when he saw a notification pop up from Lute. Her message consisted of how some of the exterminators got into a quarrel during roll call and the ones involved got injured in the process. She said she was going to discipline them.
Adam did not want to know what she meant by that and was most likely not going to stop by their place today.
“Really. I’m not. Sorry. It’s just that yesterday’s been…”
“Uh-huh…” At this point, Adam was not listening to anything you were saying. But when he still heard the static noise that was your words, he groaned. “Look, sweetie, I really don’t give a fuckin’ shit about your fuckin’ apology, ʼkay? I don’t fuckin’ care. Now what do you want?”
You saw Adam’s confused yet concerned expression after he looked up from his phone and immediately noticed that you were starting to cry. You instantly turned your face away as you carefully wiped your eyes.
“Sorry. Sorry. I’m not crying because of you.” You didn’t know if that was true. You didn’t know if you were crying because of his words or were crying because of everything else.
That was the first time he ever used a sweet petname for you in a long time. He only ever used that to demean or mock other people.
Shit. Stop thinking—you were going to cry more. But even after carefully wiping your eyes away, new tears kept flowing. You couldn’t stop. This was humiliating. You wanted to disappear. You didn’t want anyone to witness you in this state. It was mortifying.
“Shit.” Adam’s voice came out panicky as he held his hands out towards you, but he hesitated. Hesitated in what, he didn’t even know.
He…didn’t think you could cry.
Adam didn’t know what to do; this emotional shit wasn’t his thing. He couldn’t ask you to leave, he knew that much, but he didn’t want to leave himself. This was his place. Why should he leave?
So, he did the only thing he could do in this situation.
You suddenly felt something warm envelop you.
You didn’t look up, but you knew it was Adam. You could feel the texture of his robe on your hands and the side of your face. You could feel his hands on your shoulder blade, but you couldn’t quite feel his arms on you.
You stopped wiping your eyes for a moment.
No one had ever hugged you before when you were sad.
No one had ever let you be sad.
Adam heard you sob.
Fucking great. He made it worse. What the fuck was he supposed to do then?
But when he went to unwrap his arms, he felt yours slip around his midsection, pulling him closer than before as he grunted from your firm hold.
So you wanted to be hugged? Alright. Whatever.
Adam slowly hugged you back after you muttered a ‘sorry’ and loosened your grip.
The next seconds were silent, so when he heard muffled words coming from you, he looked down. You also looked up moments later when he didn’t respond, realizing he must’ve not heard you.
Your gaze softened as you two held eye contact, and with teary eyes, you smiled. “Thank you, Adam.”
Something about his expression changed, but before you could stare any longer, you felt a hand behind your head push you back to his chest as the arm on your back held you tight.
“Yeah, whatever…”
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earthtooz · 10 months
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x : AVOIDANCE :*+゚
in which: falling for blade was not on your agenda, so naturally you decide to distance yourself. however, the last thing you'd predicted was blade being upset with the sudden space.
warnings: 2.3k wc, FLUFF, ooc!blade probably bc i'm still trying to figure it out, kafka meddles with the two of you, gn!stellaron hunter!reader who has a past lol, NOT PROOFREAD, idiots in love bc i love that trope, bad writing
a/n: thank you to the anon who gave me this idea :D much appreciated, i had a lot of fun with this one when my angstier fics were draining me af. i hope you enjoy, apologies if it's a little low quality, but it's my child <3
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when you first joined the team of stellaron hunters, you didn’t expect to get much out of it, especially since the team looked so cold, calculating, mischievous, and unforgiving, greeting you with vicious smiles and muddy eyes. preemptively, you assumed the most you would receive is acquaintanceship.
however, time has proven you wrong, because on the contrary, you have found comfort, friendship, and stability in the form of this mismatched group.
you never expected to find love either.
but you did, and it might be the worst decision your heart has ever made.
“y/n, there you are. kafka and i are thinking about going out to lunch. want to join?” silver wolf’s voice interrupts your train of thought, disrupting your peace in your private spot amongst the gardens.
“oh, hi silver wolf,” you murmur, shutting your book after shoving in a bookmark. “who else is going?”
“kafka asked blade and he agreed.”
the genius hacker doesn’t notice the way you tense upon hearing a certain swordman’s name. instead, you play it cool by opening up your book again, scanning the pages in hopes of ignoring the racing of your heart.
“i think i’ll pass on this one. thank you though,” you mutter.
“really?” the silver-haired asks, popping her gum before shrugging. “whatever you say. i’m off!”
“bye!”
hearing her footsteps fade, you slump in your seat, your memories with blade hauntingly eminent in your mind. you don’t recall when you fell for him, or why exactly, all you have in your recollection is a series of moments that you look back fondly upon with a full heart, love slowly seeping in to you and causing your affections to grow to the size that they reside at now.
when you had realised, the love had already grown too big to deflate, and dejection struck moments after; a big bang of butterflies in your stomach that all disintegrated straight after.
how brutal- perhaps this was an indication that blade was rubbing off on you too much, and you need to cleanse yourself of his influence.
love, although fickle, was not something that you avidly rejected. despite having lived like a hunted deer, your experiences have been fleeting, building your delicate heart for a life of meeting, falling, then leaving when you least wanted to, needing to run before an arrow pierced you- and certainly not cupid’s one. 
but with blade, everything is different. there is no arrow to run from, not in the life that elio has foreseen for you. for the first time in your life, you can stop running away and try fall into the arms of love with little remorse.
it's just ironic that you fall into the arms of a man who should not be touched.
“y/n’s not coming with us today,” silver wolf reports after meeting up with the other two stellaron hunters.
“oh?” kafka hums, “usually y/n’s always willing to hangout, why’s that?”
“busy or something, i don’t know, i didn’t care to ask.”
the slight scrunch of displeasure in blade’s expression passes by the keen eyes of both kafka and silver wolf. if either of them had noticed then perhaps it would have been a topic of interest, but for the time being, the pair move on (faster than the third member), your unusual absence dismissed in favour of where to get food.
as the days turn into nights and elio issues more missions and mumbles more futures, blade feels as though he sees you less and less.
it’s not intuition more than it is you purposefully ignoring and evading blade in your everyday, though.
“good morning,” kafka’s voice greets when she walks in to the cafeteria, where you were eating breakfast alone. setting down your phone, you regard her with a mouth full of bread. “gross. at least swallow first.”
“screw off,” you murmur. “how did you sleep?”
“fine fine, i woke up in the wrong position though and my neck is killing me, but what about you? seems like you’ve been up a while.”
“i’ve been up since asscrack of dawn.” 
the purple-haired regards you with amusement. “why’s that?”
“body clock or whatever,” you lie, staring down at your glass of water.
“i see,” kafka hums half-heartedly, as if seeing right through you. “well, i’m going to get some coffee, i’ll be right back.”
“mk.”
you’re left on your own for only a few minutes, waiting patiently in silence for kafka to return. the morning is cool and pleasant, and the smell of rain is still heavy in the air as the morning dew lightens the atmosphere. the weather will surely get hotter as the day matures, but for now, you enjoy the gentle caress of sunlight on your back.
or rather- you were enjoying the gentle caress of the sun, but the methodicalness of it all is ruined when you spot a certain figure with dark, long hair beside kafka.
suddenly the last thing you know is peace and calm, and the abrupt, painful scraping of your chair against the floor symbolises that.
“going somewhere?” kafka asks.
picking up your scraps, you avoid blade’s gaze. “yeah! i- uh, realised that i have some documents to drop off for elio by twelve or whatever.”
“won't you stay to keep us company for breakfast,” the purple-haired tempts, “it feels like it’s been so long since we’ve spent some proper time together.”
“has it?” you laugh nervously and kafka easily picks up the pitchiness of your tone. “i’ll make it up soon, i promise, i’ve just been overflowed with things to do.”
“alright. you be off then. don’t work too hard.”
“i won’t. my head is remaining tight on my shoulders, don’t you worry!” you reassure before scrambling away, feeling like your legs could not be any slower as you retreat away from blade’s scrutinising gaze. when you round the corner, you sigh a breath of relief. 
it’s laughable and simultaneously admirable how dedicated you are about dodging every interaction possible, but for the record, you think you’re doing quite well. not that space was doing many favours for your heart, but persistence is key. 
whoever believed that distance makes the heart grow fonder just clearly didn’t try enough, because yours feels like it’s about to hammer out of your chest with how fast it is racing, and the sensation is equivalent to something like pain rather than fondness.
“i’m worried,” blade mutters, gaze lingering on where you’d just disappeared. “and why does y/n talk like i’m not right here?”
“aww, are you upset?” coos kafka, taking a seat. the swordsman mimics her.
“why wouldn’t i be? it feels like y/n has been ignoring me as of late.”
kafka hums thoughtfully, swirling her coffee cup around.
“do you know anything about that?”
“nup. nothing at all,” she answers, feigning ignorance to the many suspicions that are bubbling around in her mind. the last thing kafka is, is blind, your unusual behaviour has not bypassed her perceptive eye at all, but she believes she has uncovered the reasoning as to why; said reasoning being a certain swordsman.
the revelation is definitely interesting, and she might just be able to give the push you both need.
“y’know what, bladie? if it concerns you that much, i’d say you go check up on y/n later,” kafka suggests.
“why not you?”
“i’ll be busy, but i think some support in dire times is just what y/n needs.”
“okay. fine.”
when blade gathers the courage to check up on you, like kafka recommended, the time is nearing 5pm. the sun is beginning to cool, the animals are retreating into their nests, and the big, bad, intimidating stellaron hunter is roaming around the archives, where you’re situated to work, hoping to locate you.
it takes a few laps around to finally find your placement because you’re fast asleep, only identifiable to blade by the jacket you hung on the back of your chair.
the sight of you hunched over your desk over a multitude of forms and papers causes a wave of concern (however much he can feel) to wash over blade, and suddenly, he does something completely foreign to him: dote over someone.
gently lifting your jacket to cover your shoulders, he stills when you shift a little, your eyebrows furrowing in your sleep. deciding to leave you alone, all blade spares is one lasting look at your vulnerability before leaving. 
he wonders what it is that could be making you so frustrated. 
(if only he knew). 
a few days later, kafka confronts you about the suspicions that’s been creeping to the forefront of her mind.
“did you do something to piss a certain bladie off?” 
kafka’s saccharine voice is laced with mischief as she leans towards you, chin resting on the palm of her hand. she certainly does not miss the way you tense up at the mention of the swordsman’s name and her smirk widens when you shuffle away, subconsciously turning away, as if avoiding the subject.
“i can’t think of why i would have,” you murmur, crossing your arms. “why?”
“oh, nothing, he’s just been complaining and crying a lot recently.”
“he does that all the time.”
“so he does,” your fellow stellaron hunter hums. “except he’s mentioning your name a lot more nowadays.” 
you freeze. “what?”
“hm? did i say something peculiar?”
inhaling a deep breath, you steady yourself. you know what kafka wants out of you and you’re not going to give it to her despite how innocent and pretty she spins the web to look. after all these years together, you hope to have learnt a thing or two about how to avoid her snare.
“what is blade saying about me?” you quiz. 
she blinks at you. “why so curious if you haven’t done anything?” 
“can i not ask about something that involves my name? besides, he’s my friend, i want to know what he’s saying,” you lean against the back of the couch, trying to calm the involuntary shake in your legs. you despise that the slightest mention of blade can cause a bottomless pit to form in your stomach and it’s not because of how intimidating or threatening he is. 
no, it’s because you’ve fallen for him, hook, line, and centre.
and blade would have to die before you ever tell him.
“mostly just grumbles about wondering where you are,” kafka expands, waving her hands about to match her words. “he asked silver wolf and i if you’ve been talking to us and when we said ‘yes’, he looked pissed! when i asked why he was being a sourpuss, he just stormed off.”
“so temperamental, that man,” she sighs. then, she looks back at you with those half-lidded eyes that have always gotten her what she wants, and in this case, they’re answers. “so tell me, y/n, what did you do to our bladie to have him all riled up like this?”
“nothing. absolutely nothing.”
“are you sure?”
“positive.”
“positive?”
you avoid her curious gaze. “positive.”
“maybe i phrased the question wrong. has bladie done something to you instead?”
panic settles within you. “no,” you lie through your teeth. “he hasn’t.”
“so if i asked you why you left breakfast so abruptly that day, you wouldn’t say that it’s because of him?”
“i had work to do, kafka, you know how busy my job gets.”
“i know, i know,” she persists, “then why weren’t you in a hurry before blade arrived that morning?”
you don’t know how to refute that, letting silence speak volumes instead.
“and why did you skip out on lunch with silver wolf and i? was it because we also invited a certain someone?”
“okay! fine, you’ve got me. what do you want to know?” you explode, tossing your phone on the couch in frustration. 
“so it is about blade?” questions your coworker.
“yeah. it is.”
“what about him? did he do something to hurt you? you know he’s accidentally mean sometimes-”
“it’s not that, he’s nothing but a sweetheart.”
“so what’s the problem?”
“that is the problem! he’s just… he’s him.”
“is that bad?”
“for my heart, yes.”
“oh my- so you like him?”
you exhale exasperatedly, “don’t act like you haven’t already figured that out, kafka.”
the cheshire smile she then flashes sends shivers down your spine. for whatever reason, an oppressive feeling grows in your gut, resembling something like a warning.
“you’re right, i knew,” she flaunts. then, her gaze cuts to look behind you. “but i don’t think blade did.”
your heart lurches out of your chest with enough force to pull you off the couch and you stumble around to see that, lo and behold, blade was indeed standing in the hallway. the expression he wears tells you enough; he heard you, he knows.
kafka somehow sneaks her way out of the room, leaving you alone to deal with the face of rejection. it’s daunting being in the same space as him after so long, you almost forgot about the intimidating pressure that blade naturally exudes and projects in every space he enters.
“hi,” you start, looking away. 
he stalks over to you, footsteps soundless before stopping a feet in front of you. instead of saying something, the swordsman merely gazes down at you whilst you keep your eyes glued to the side.
“can you reject me already? the silence is kinda killing me,” you snap after a few seconds, crossing your arms protectively. 
instead of obeying to your request, blade does something completely unexpected; he very gently lifts your chin with his hand, and red eyes bore right into yours. is it odd to feel seen in your demise? because blade is looking- no, surveying you with such immense focus and clarity that your heart stills, frozen in position because it wants him to see the most picturesque part of you. 
(he sees it, but he wants to know more of you. the pretty, the ugly, the likeable, and the unwanted.)
“would you like to go on a date?” he asks.
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© EARTHTOOZ 2023, do not steal, translate, repost my fics and do not recommend my fics onto any other site.
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satoruhour · 8 months
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AFTERCARE
a/n: an aftercare collection from da old blog, enjoy! plus also i had an anon asking abt nanami aftercare !!! u read my mind lol / tagging @na-t0, @jabamin who do i tag !!!!!
wc: 2k
warnings: overall fluff, contains nsfw at the start, pet names for all, praise, protected sex, implied breeding, tickle fight (gojo), unprotected sex, creampie/breeding (geto & nanami), implied fwb, cuddling, unprotected sex, creampie/breeding (toji), n*sfw under the cut
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✶ GOJO
“oh, good girl, that’s it,” gojo mumbles out breathlessly, forehead against yours as you both come together. his lips continue to mutter out praises because he knew how much they affected you, and he hopes that you’d forget all of his saccharine words just so he could make you shiver and whimper all over again. your back arches into his hold one last time, digging your nails into his back.
“you did so well for me — shit — i didn’t think you still had any energy left,” gojo laughs breathlessly at how tired you two were after a mission, yet you know none of you could hold back on each other when passion took over. there’s a slight smile lingering on his face at your sweat-filled forehead and heaving chest and he loves, loves that he’s the only one to make you feel this way. the way moonlight weaves through the window makes you look stunning, and gojo’s smile can’t help but widen.
“what?”
he shrugs, removing his flaccid cock from you and eventually, the condom from himself. he ties a knot quickly, dumping it into the trash beside the bed, but before he can make a move to the bathroom to get you a wet towel, he feels your weight on his arm. it makes his heart flutter and sends shivers down his spine at the thought of doing away with contraception altogether — how would you look with his baby? who’s features would they get? what— 
“satoru.” gojo snaps out of his stupor, observing silently while you moved across the bed to him (hell, you sometimes forget he has a king sized), kneeling so you’d almost be at his height. “why were you smiling at me earlier?”
he eyes you with a levelled stare, grin turning into a smirk, “nah, no, it was nothing, baby.”
“hmm… really?” your arms hang limply over his shoulders, “i feel like i should know, you know.”
gojo simply winks, cutting off the teasing atmosphere with a deep kiss before he takes advantage of the situation, hands flying to your sides and you yelp, loudly. your laughter breaks through the quietness at 1am, making your stomach hurt and body squirmy.
“just planning a tickle attack s’all, princess.”
“y-you— fiend!” you try your best to escape the torture, but gojo is relentless in seeing you suffer, his laughter mixing with yours as his initial agenda is yet again interrupted. “satoru!” you both collapse into the soft sheets, giggles slowly subsiding to broad smiles as you admire the other, and him, you.
“god, you’re beautiful.” gojo’s stare bores into you and you avoid eye contact just like every other time he’s told you that, but your lover made it a point to make it clear to you.
“i love you, my pretty girl.”
✶ GETO
geto doesn’t stop giving you kisses even when he releases in you, helping you through the overstimulation by holding you tight until the euphoric feeling subsides and everything halts. there’s a moment of quietness, save for some concerned questions from your boyfriend like he hadn’t just blown your back out.
“sweetheart? you okay?” his eyebrows knit together, always worried that he might’ve hurt you in any way. but you’re always too tired to answer after, simply settling for a delicate hand to his face and a faint nod.
“kiss me,” it comes out as a whisper and dies out, dazed and still on cloud nine and geto indulges you like the lovestruck lover he is. even if he doesn’t need your palm to guide him, he lets your hand bring him right to your lips where they lay waiting. his kiss is soft, unlike before, moulding against your lips perfectly and like always, it makes you sigh and smile. “how’re your lips always so soft?”
geto smiles, hair falling from his loose hair tie. it shields his face and you think he looks like a greek god. “they just are, darling.”
your boyfriend’s always prepared when it comes to cleaning you up, so he usually has towels draped across the bedside table’s railing. wetting it with some water, he warns you gently with the free hand that strokes your thigh.
“but i also sorta use the lip balm gojo uses.” he cheekily admits, hand still diligently wiping at your core. he makes sure to cover it one, twice, thrice, before turning around to stand up. “i can buy it and we’ll share it instead.”
from here, his eyes skim over how the sheets cover you, and how your pose is provocative yet guarded — like an unnamed muse in a romanticism painting. there’s a teasing tone in your smile, a slow and languid drag to your movements. your dramatic gasp cuts off his thoughts, and your acting falls apart when you see geto’s jaw dropping in faux shock, “so you’ve been indirectly kissing your best friend this whole time? how dare you, suguru?”
geto slaps you lightly with the towel, laughing, “you’re crazy.”
“and that’s why you love me.”
he simply rolls his eyes, crawling back onto the bed to come face to face with you, the you who’s still feeling a bit playful, the you who grins at him and thinks that you like your suguru unkempt and messy and drunk in love with you.
the kiss tastes a bit like cigarettes, a little less prominent than earlier, but it tastes like him, nevertheless. “yeah, yeah. although, you’re the only one i’d wanna kiss — no one else, but you.”
✶ NANAMI
nanami groans into your neck with a final thrust, skin feeling the way your body shivered and trembled at how his cock twitches in you. he pumps you full, drinking in the moans of his name and he stays sheathed in you, face buried in your neck like none other. you realise it’s his favourite position — to stay close to you, to feel your pulse, to hear the almost inaudible sounds.
“you’re perfect, fuck,” nanami says, breathless, body propped up with his elbows by your ears; and of course you’ve heard your lover swear — at gojo, at some stubborn curse, at the terrible dishwasher in your home in kuantan and at you, sometimes, but never said like this. nanami looks at you like you’ve the breeze of the beach and the sunset that dips below the horizon.
you had the privilege of seeing that everyday, yet nanami choses to look at you each time, even if you’re always fixated on the scene. today you get the chance to see the love he has stored for you within his irises, and before you can retaliate, you feel his lips on you. nanami moans into the kiss, the need to feel you again taking over him as he deepens it, kissing down your jaw and neck and chest until you remember the abandoned pancake batter you were mixing.
“kento, honey,” he hums into your chest, acting like a child dreading school. “we can’t leave the batter out in the open.”
nanami grunts, “just leave it. i’ll cook eggs and have some kaya on toast or something later.”
“but that’s exactly why we decided to cook pancakes!” you laugh softly, hands running through his blonde hair. it’s starting to whiten a bit, too, but you don’t mind. if anything, he makes getting old look good, “to have a change from our normal breakfast.”
nanami sighs, blinking tiredly at you as he lifts his head to look at you, and every time he fails to resist your expression. you’re not even doing anything, sitting there looking pretty and your husband simply can’t fathom the action of saying ‘no’. he doesn’t want to move from his place — because your profile against the endless stretch of the ocean is a vision he never thought would come true.
nanami gives in, like he always does.
“fine, you win.”
you cheer with a big grin that escalates into giggles as nanami sweeps you off the sheets, placing a kiss against your temple. he smiles at you, at the possibility of living here until he dies; and if that possibility is compromised, he’d fight to make it okay again. he would bring them to hell himself if he could.
nanami kento never liked killing curses, but for you, he would spill blood again just to keep you safe.
✶ TOJI
toji never gave up the chance to fuck you stupid, always propped up in some dingy motel while the money from his sorcerer missions are left on the bedside table. he has yet to splurge it, the need to gamble getting less and less the more and more he sees you. he grunts into your hair behind as your hands make a mess of the vanity table — both too needy today to use the bed — one hand under your leg and the other on your waist as he spills into you.
“that’s a good girl,” your pupils are blown wide at the unexpected orgasm as his cum spurts into you, hitting you like a truck that you’re begging for toji to slow down until he pulls out and his cum drips to the floor. but you notice he doesn’t scoop it up and tease you like always, he doesn’t tell his little insults while slipping on his pants, nor does he avoid aftercare like the lazy and non-chivalrous man he was — no, you notice the silent movements of toji. he was never this quiet, surprising you even more when he sits on the bed.
“what the hell are you starin’ at?” his eyes are locked on the floor, the distance from your to the bed a few mere steps yet it felt like crossing the globe.
you swallow. after all, he was still a large, bulking man, and while his gruff voice did wonders, it always made you a little terrified out of sex. “oh— uhm, nothing.” with another sigh from him, your curiosity gets the better of you, inching towards him with cautious steps. “toji-san?”
his hands are hesitant to reach out towards you, but they make haste to grip onto your waist and although they’re nothing like the rough ones earlier, you still get a flutter in your heart at how big his hands seem to be. they wrap around your waist before his head falls onto your stomach. too scared to ask, you just settle for playing with his hair, content with the warmness of the embrace.
“you’re making me confused.”
frowning, you raise his head from his safe place, “how so?”
you’re careful, because you know about toji’s past through rumours, you know about his hesitancy to show vulnerability. you’re holding his heart, and you’re hoping the words you mutter out don’t shatter and make him bleed again. toji grunts, yanking you down to sit beside him before staring into space as the night winds down. you can both hear the rooms quietening down and the world going to sleep.
“i don’t like this.”
and your heart breaks, because of how toji hates love and how every experience has never ended positively. we fuck and i leave, got it? if you tell me you like me or something, i’m breaking this off. so you lean forward to hold his cheek, offering a small smile. ironic that he’s told you that and yet he feels like he’s the one who broke his own rule.
“it’s okay if you don’t, i’ll be here no matter how you’re feeling; i won’t even say a word.”
toji curls his lip in disgust, but you know he doesn’t mean it when he grabs your hand, “that line was cheesy. i fuckin’ hate it.”
“it was good, i liked it.”
he only shakes his head with a sigh and lies down along with a gesture that says are you coming or what? before your smile is uncontainable and you’re moving to his side. even if you’ve only known what his body feels against you, you’re already hoping it’d happen again and toji reluctantly feels the same, wrapping an arm around your waist with lips to your hair. your heart soars when he doesn’t move away from your hand interlacing with his.
“not a word.”
you giggle at his tone, and the harshness of it. and if you read in between the lines, you’d see that there’s a bit of endearment in him, you just hoped you had the rest of your life to make him love love again.
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lowkeychenle · 4 months
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See My Sea [ZCL] (M)
Description: You never expected your lab partner to be the captain of the basketball team...or a decent human being, but you get proved wrong twice. Despite a rocky past of your own, you find yourself falling for him faster than you thought. Maybe, with his help, you can finally find your way home and see your sea.
A/N: this is inspired by Marine Turtle sort of ??? it just gave me these vibes oops. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!! I hope u take this fic with u into 2024 lol
Genre: Fluff/Smut/Angst (College AU where Chenle is captain of the basketball team like he DESERVES)
Content Warnings: SLOW BURN! Drinking, alcohol, intoxication, some instances of friends being shitty, verbally abusive ex-boyfriend appearances, mentions/instances of anxiety and insecurity, a panic attack Smut warnings: This might be some of my mildest smut omg, usage of pet names 'baby' and 'sunshine,' oral (f & m receiving), slight dirty talk? there's not much rip
Word Count: 20,040
Pairing: Zhong Chenle x fem!Reader (feat. Mark & Jisung, a male OC named Woojin, and three female OCs, Soobin, Jiyoon, & Heewon)
Juliet's Masterlist | Tell me what you think? :)
Taglist: @carelessshootanonymous @thisisnotjacinta @soberhani @fullsunstrawberry @midmourn
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“I think your answer’s wrong,” the boy next to you says, leaning over your shoulder to look.
You blink in frustration, already hating the new seating arrangement your college professor forced upon you. When you turn to give him your best glare, you hesitate for a brief moment when you see the genuine concern on his face.
His black hair is draped like a curtain over his forehead, just a bit too long. Soft brown eyes stare back at you, unblinking for several seconds as he scans over your expression. His lips are slightly parted as if he wants to continue, but isn’t sure what to say.
“Sorry,” he mutters. “It’s just…if you get it wrong, it kind of affects me now, too.”
“Why would it affect you?” You recoil and slide your paper farther from him.
“This…is a lab.” He frowns. “And that makes us lab partners for the foreseeable future.”
“Ah, great.” You close your eyes and drop your head into your hands.
“I’m trying to help,” he replies.
“Well, I actually prefer to work alone.”
You don’t know exactly where your snippiness is coming from, but you don’t appreciate this random ass guy trying to correct your work. He could’ve at least introduced himself first instead of immediately selecting the douchebag category.
“I don’t think we really have a choice.” He taps his fingers on top of the table. “Sorry if I pissed you off, I was just…”
He clicks his tongue, presses his lips into a thin line, and his eyebrows jolt up quickly before he turns away from you and back to his own work. You take a deep breath, your heart sinking at the idea of snapping at him when he didn’t deserve it.
It’s taken you a long time to get used to people genuinely trying to help you, and your brain sometimes doesn’t get the memo that not everything is a derogatory comment.
“Sorry,” you say softly, inhaling deeply. “You were being nice. And I’m being a bitch.”
“I wouldn’t use that word.” He snorts as he scribbles down some words on his paper.
“Seriously?”
“I don’t like using it in a bad way.” He sets his pencil down and runs his fingers through his hair to push it back.
You laugh. “Don’t men find things like that funny?”
“What kind of guys are you talking to?” The boy scrunches up his nose and shakes his head.
“I…” You pause, pursing your lips. That’s a good question. “But really, I am sorry. I hope we can rewind and work together.”
“Luckily for you, I don’t hold grudges.” He grins and holds his hand out to you. “I’m Chenle. I’m a senior getting a degree in music theory and I’m the captain of the basketball team.”
You think about the information for a second—he seems like a nice person from what you’ve seen thus far, but the basketball team makes him lose a couple points. Most boys in college sports don’t have the best reputations.
Your palm meets his as you take his greeting. “I’m (Y/N). I’m also a senior, but my degree is in Fine Arts. And I’m the captain of embarrassing myself and my friends.”
He chuckles at that one before brandishing his paper over to you.
“What?” you ask.
“I’m gonna help you figure out the right answer.” Chenle beckons you closer.
You hesitate for a moment, but eventually decide nothing will happen in the middle of your science lab. Scooting your chair over to his, you allow him to lean toward you. You ignore the nervousness gathering as the scent of his cologne invades your nostrils. It smells smoky, but in an artificial way. You doubt the man has ever touched anything bad for him in his entire life.
“This one is easy to fuck up,” he murmurs, his pencil scratching against the paper as he leads you through it.
You attempt to pay attention, but as much as you hate to admit it, the smell of him is intoxicating and him being near you has every single one of your senses on edge. Sweat starts to form on your skin, and you almost curse under your breath.
He glances at you out of the corner of his eye, looks back at the paper, and then his gaze rests back on you, like whatever he saw during his first sweep caught his attention.
“Are you alright?” he asks.
You blink, frowning at him. “Why are you asking me that?”
“Uh.” He wets his lips, his cheeks reddening slightly beneath fluorescent lighting. “You’re staring at me instead of the answer I’m giving you.”
Embarrassment rushes through you like a wildfire in a dry forest, and you immediately snatch the assignment away from him and move your chair away. Disbelief wracks your body, because you only realize at that moment that he’s right—you were much more interested in his facial features and the softness of his skin instead of the only reason you let him around you in the first place.
It’s been a long time since anyone has distracted you in that way. All it does is make you want to run away at full speed, but there’s still a few minutes of class left.
“I’m sorry,” he says. “I didn’t mean to offend you or anything.”
“Just…forget it.” You shake your head. “I’ll figure this out so you don’t lose points.”
“And then what?” He raises an eyebrow at you.
“Huh?”
“It’s not only this assignment.” Chenle taps his fingers against the desk. “It’s all of them. And I don’t want to be a dick, but I’m kind of used to people staring at me.”
You laugh incredulously, dropping your head into your palms. “The universe has fucked me.”
He doesn’t respond, seemingly waiting for you to continue whatever’s on your mind.
“That was kinda douchey.” You fidget with your pencil.
“It’s not douchey if it’s true.” He scoffs. “And I haven’t even done anything to you, so I don’t understand where this hostility has come from after being around me for ten minutes.”
“I just don’t like—”
“Men?” he interjects.
“You.” 
“Okay, well.” He rolls his eyes, inhaling deeply. “I don’t know what your problem is. Did I breathe incorrectly in your direction? I’m trying to help you and you’re not being nice at all. You were the one staring at me, I feel like I should remind you of that.”
“I was not star—”
“Alright, class, your lab assignments have been finalized. You’ll be working with your partner for the rest of the semester, and if there are any issues, you’re adults. Figure it out. The first set of problems will be due tomorrow at the start of class,” the teacher interrupts your thoughts, and leaves both you and Chenle gaping.
“Professor, I have a basketball game tonight—”
“Well, then you’d better finish the worksheet early, Mr. Zhong,” she insists.
“For fuck’s sake,” Chenle murmurs under his breath, running his fingers through his hair. Stress melds through his expression as his brows pinch together, and it almost makes you feel bad for him.
You know next to nothing about basketball. In fact, you weren’t 100% aware your school even had a team.
After he takes a second to calm down, he turns to you. “What are you doing for lunch?”
“I meet my friends every day.” You shrug.
“Oh, great. I’m coming with you.” He starts shoving things into his bag, not giving you a second to comprehend what he’s saying.
“It wasn’t an invitation,” you say.
“I’m not failing because of you.” Chenle sets his bag down on the table. “I don’t know what I did to give you such a bad impression, but you haven’t done much better yourself, okay? The sooner we get this done, the sooner I can worry about getting to practice on time.”
“Practice? I thought it was a game.”
He stares at you blankly, blinking slowly. “I…I practice before my games.” His tone is sharp, as if he expects you to know that already.
“You’re the captain.”
“No shit.” Irritation sparks in his gaze. “Which means I have to be good. And prepared.”
“Now who’s being a dick?” you shoot back. “Am I supposed to just know everything about you already?”
“This…is going to be fucking impossible.” He massages his forehead and takes a deep breath. “We’ll try to finish it in the next ten minutes before class ends, then.”
Spoiler alert, you don’t finish by the end of class, which means, unfortunately for you, you drag Chenle in tow with you to lunch, where your three friends wait for you. The girls are distracted in their conversation as you approach, and you already know what their reaction will be.
“(Y/N), you’re finally here—who’s this?” Alarm flares in Jiyoon’s brown eyes as she glances back behind you at Chenle as if you don’t know he’s there.
“You don’t know him?” Heewon asks. “Pretty sure that’s Zhong Chenle, you know, the captain of the basketball team. He’s friends with your boyfriend.”
“I’ve never seen him before.”
“Yeah, he’s right here.” You nudge Soobin’s arm so she’ll scoot over. “So if you could maybe not act like he’s not.”
“Why is he with you?” Soobin asks.
“It’s not by choice,” you grumble, dramatically gesturing to the seat next to you. “Did you guys eat yet?”
“I’m invading,” Chenle says. “I’ll go buy lunch, alright? Pizza good for everyone?”
“What? You don’t have to—”
“Just answer the question,” he says.
“Pizza’s good.” Jiyoon grins. “Thanks, Chenle.”
He presses his lips together, grabs his wallet out of his backpack, nods at you, and then heads in the opposite direction. You know the second he’s out of earshot, the girls won’t let this go. They apparently know more about him than you do, which isn’t all that surprising.
Jiyoon started dating Jisung a few weeks back, and while you’re happy for your friend (and the fact her boyfriend isn’t the worst man ever), you could never justify wasting your valuable time on anyone else right now.
“Yeah, just walk in with Zhong Chenle and don’t warn us first—”
“I didn’t even know he was a big deal. Or that he’d be coming for lunch,” you defend yourself. “We’re lab partners, and apparently, we’re being forced to work together.”
“He’s not a bad guy,” Jiyoon says. “From what I’ve heard from Jisung, he’s really passionate about basketball and stuff. So like, he takes it seriously. He’s not an ass.”
“That’s not what I’ve experienced.” You roll your eyes, wishing more than anything they would stop before they’re ahead.
“I get you’re in your ‘I hate men era’ or whatever, and I respect it, but you’re allowed to be friends with good guys. You’ll be hanging out around the team soon, anyway. Jisung wants to get our friend groups together.”
“Maybe Jisung isn’t awful, but you know how sports guys are.” You almost shiver involuntarily at the thought.
“Jisung wouldn’t hang around assholes, (Y/N),” Heewon interjects. “You haven’t met him. The kid’s an angel. You morph into the people you’re around, and if he was around dicks, he’d act like one. Or have a single red flag, at least.”
“And, to be honest, some of the team has been mentioned in some sketchy situations, but I’ve heard good things about Chenle, Jisung, and Mark. They’re not man-whores, and they—”
“Glad to hear that’s a criteria for being a good guy.” Chenle’s voice nearly sends Soobin’s soul out of her body.
Her cheeks and the tips of her ears turn bright red, and she quickly mutters out an apology.
He puts the box in the middle of the table, a small chuckle passing by his full lips as he takes a seat next to you. “No worries. I’ll pass the message to Mark. He’ll get a good laugh out of it, considering he’s probably got the highest body count on the team.”
You shift away from him slightly, this topic of conversation not entirely helping your situation with him.
“Mark?” Jiyoon snorts. “Mark Lee?”
“Surprisingly, I don’t know any other Mark.” Chenle grins. “But not every guy is vocal about how much he gets laid. Girls throw themselves at him—”
You tense, wanting nothing more than for the conversation to stop. Chenle cuts himself off, a minuscule glance in your direction making his eyebrows pinch before his poker face returns.
“Anyway, pizza.” He clears his throat, gesturing to the box.
“Wow. Mark Lee.” Heewon runs her tongue over her teeth. “And what does a girl have to do to get on that donation list?”
Jiyoon elbows her, nodding in your direction. An odd silence fills the table before Soobin opens the box and grabs the first slice. Your appetite has oddly disappeared, and none of your friends seem to realize it.
Chenle continues his conversation with Jiyoon—something about Jisung and the practice dates—but while he does that, his pen scratches across the paper on the table in front of you, and when he slides it in your direction, it’s almost unnoticeable.
you should eat
You nearly scoff, grabbing a pencil out of your bag to write your response while your friends still cluelessly converse.
not hungry
“You know, we’re having a party after the game,” Chenle mentions. “You guys should come. Assuming we win, it’ll be time for celebration.”
“Oh, you’ll win.” Jiyoon’s eyes widen. “I’ve seen clips of games online and stuff. Mostly Jisung’s. But if you’re all that good, I can’t imagine you’d lose.”
“Glad to see you’re as obsessed with him as he is with you.” He chuckles and runs his fingers through his hair. “You should all go.”
His gaze rests on you, and Soobin laughs outwardly.
“(Y/N) doesn’t go to parties.”
“Why not?” He frowns.
“It’s a long story,” you interject before any of your friends can spill your secrets. “But maybe it’s time for a change. I’ll go. If Jiyoon is going and if she promises not to ditch me for Jisung.”
“Oh, please, you haven’t been to a party since before Wooj—” Heewon stops herself with a hand over her mouth. She cringes as your chest deflates.
Leave it to your friends to rehash old wounds. You already had a shitty day between your random argument with Chenle, him tagging along with you for lunch, and now Heewon is basically telling him your secrets buried deep.
“Um,” you say, sighing. “We have an assignment to do. Do you want to go to the library or something?” When you turn to look at Chenle, he’s already gathering his things and shoving his materials in his bag.
“Yeah, sure.” His eyes scan over the table. “I’ll see you guys later.”
“(Y/N), I didn’t—”
“Not now, Heewon.” You shake your head, slinging your bag over your shoulder and heading off without another word.
It’s been many, many months since Woojin was in your life. The man who essentially tore your life apart little by little until there wasn’t anything of the real you left. You were a shell of who you used to be, and it took you much too long to realize it. Hell, you’re not 100% sure if you’ve even brought yourself back from that brink. It’s hard to figure out who you are when the person who’s supposed to love you not only drags you down to the bottom of the ocean, but buries you beneath the sand.
But none of your friends get it. They see who you are now—a mask of confidence shielding the gaping open wound—and assume you’re normal again.
Healing isn’t a straight line. You don’t wake up one day and decide to be okay, and admittedly, there are some mornings that are better than others. For most, you find it hard to come up with a reason to pull yourself out of bed.
Chenle follows you silently as you walk across campus for the library. He walks side-by-side with you and stops once he sees the cafe come into view.
“Hey, I’m gonna get some coffee,” he says. “Come with?”
“Uh, yeah. We can just do the work in there, if that’s okay.”
He gives you a half smile and nods, gesturing toward the building for you to lead the way. Once you make it to the door, he opens it for you. You frown, but walk in regardless.
“I’ll get it. What do you usually order?” he asks.
“Oh, no, that’s okay.” You wave him off. “I can get my own—”
“Tell me.” His tone is soft, yet firm, as if you don’t really have any other option but to tell him what coffee you want.
With a sigh, you tell him your order and he walks off with a smug smile on his face. You set all of your stuff up on one of the tables, deciding which questions you need to work on first while you wait for Chenle.
He places a cup in front of you before clasping both hands around his own. Standing there, he doesn’t move until you look up at him, wondering why the hell he isn’t sitting down.
“Can we start over?” he asks. “We clearly got off on the wrong foot, and I don’t want you to hate the entire semester if you’ve got to work with me.”
You pause, clearing your throat. “I’d prefer it that way, I think. If we started over, I mean. I was kind of a bitch, and it wasn’t even your fault, I just…have some issues with trusting people.”
“I noticed.” He chuckles, a grin plastering on his face as he takes his seat across from you. “And I still don’t like that word.”
“Sorry. I was being an ass. Is that better?”
“Yeah, it is. You were an ass.” He sips his drink.
You press your lips together to stop your laugh, but it doesn’t prevent your eyes from rolling.
“And I’m sorry, too. If I made you uncomfortable earlier. Or if I did, indeed, do something to make you hate me randomly.” His fingertips tap against the table. “It really wasn’t my intention.”
“It’s not you. At all.” You scoff to yourself, flipping through the stack of papers before you. “I don’t want to talk about it. But I’ll try to remind myself people are innocent until proven guilty.”
“So…you’ll come tonight?” Chenle hesitates briefly, wetting his lips. “You could come to the game, too. I’m sure Jiyoon would like someone to sit with besides Jisung’s parents.”
“I know nothing about basketball,” you reply, quirking an eyebrow at him.
“Well, yeah, but you could always learn. And now you have friends on the team, so it doesn’t matter if you know or not.” He grabs the first assignment to look at it, pretending as if your answer doesn’t impact him.
You think about it for a moment. After all, maybe you were wrong about him—maybe he’s not some awful guy, and you were wrong to assume that after knowing him for five minutes. The longer you spend time with him, the more genuine he seems. You could use more friends, but you can’t help but wonder if Chenle is the type of guy you should entertain.
Woojin had you fucked up. Between the sports teams and friend groups and everything that went wrong with him, it was so hard to even imagine being friends with Chenle or any of the other guys on the basketball team.
“I’ll think about it,” you mutter. “Don’t get your hopes up about the game, but I’ll be at the party for sure.”
“Party’s a strong word, by the way. It’s just the team and our close friends, so it won’t be like…a rager or anything.”
You nod, chewing the inside of your cheek. “Alright. We should get started before we run out of time again.”
You weren’t planning on going to the game. Not in the slightest. But when the time got closer and closer to seven, you realized there was an odd urge within you that made you want to go. You made the split second decision to text Jiyoon and tell her to pick you up.
Jiyoon brought you a shirt to wear—a simple school T-shirt that said the basketball team’s name on it—and insisted you change before the two of you left. You did as she said, and by the time you got to the gym, you were almost regretting your decision.
You and Jiyoon sat in the bottom row right in the middle. There goes the opportunity to pretend you weren’t there. Maybe he wouldn’t see you. He’ll be too focused on the game, and he won’t even give you a second glance. You’re not sure why the idea of him knowing you’re here makes you so God damn sweaty, but you choose to ignore it.
“What’s wrong with you?” Jiyoon asks, nudging your arm.
“Huh? Nothing.” You shake your head. “I’m good.”
She clicks her tongue. “I’ve been your friend for years, (Y/N). You look nervous.”
“I don’t think I should really be here, I guess, like…I was an ass to him earlier, and now I’m sitting here like I know what I’m watching and like I belong here when he probably doesn’t even like me at all—”
“Dude, you’re rambling,” she cuts you off, placing her palm on your shoulder. “You said he was the one who told you to come. So I don’t think being unwelcome is your problem. Everything’s gonna be fine! I promise. I give you full permission to stare at Jisung the whole time if you have to.”
“He’s not my type.”
“Is anyone at this point?”
“I…” You purse your lips. “I guess you’re right.”
You’re surprised to see the seats fill up quickly, and despite Jiyoon only dating Jisung for a few weeks, she seems really friendly with both of his parents as they sit down in the two spots next to her. Jiyoon leans close to you.
“The couple that just sat down next to Jisung’s parents are Chenle’s parents. Ji and Chenle have been friends since they were really young, I guess,” Jiyoon explains.
Curiosity gets the best of you, and when you look at them, you try to figure out which one he resembles the most. His mother turns and meets your gaze, and you quickly avert it as your face burns. What the hell are you doing?
You wait in anxious silence with Jiyoon until the game begins, and your eyes immediately seek out Chenle. At first, you think you’re looking for Jisung so you can point him out to Jiyoon, but you’re still watching the boys enter the court long after Jisung is already out.
When Chenle makes it out on the court, the wide smile on his face takes you off-guard. There’s no denying the truth—he’s attractive. That’s the extent of what you know about him at this point, but you see plenty of attractive men every day. It’s not like they’ve ever garnered your attention in a way that made you want to watch them.
Unlike earlier, his hair is part down the middle now, probably from running around in practice and preparing for the game. He runs his fingers through it as he walks up to Jisung. The taller man was already standing with their other friend, who you can only assume is Mark. Chenle’s jersey has his last name printed in big letters on the back, along with the number 30.
You try not to study him, but somehow he’s like a damn magnet. No wonder he said he was used to people staring at him.
Jisung glances once in your direction, and then he nudges Chenle and gives him a nearly non-existent nod. He turns, and the second he sees you, his brows jump up in some sort of surprise. Then he grins at you.
“You’re being weird,” Jiyoon mentions, breaking you out of your trance.
“Huh? How am I being weird? He looked at me.”
“Yeah…because he invited you. And you’re here.” She snorts, running her fingers through her hair. “Speaking of which, I think he’s coming over here.”
Your eyes widen, and your head shoots up just in time to see Chenle jogging over to you. You have to crane your neck upward to look at him when he’s right in front of you, and you’re sure the shock on your face is what causes laughter to drop past his lips.
He pulls a simple bracelet off his wrist—one made with blue and gold thread—and holds it out to you. “Wear this for me?”
You blink up at him. “Why?”
“If you wear it and we win, you’re our good luck charm,” he states simply.
Your cheeks burn (hopefully unnoticeably) as you gently take it out of his palm. Your fingertips brush against his skin despite how hard you tried to avoid touching him, and once it’s completely in your hand, he backs away from you as Jiyoon helps you tighten it around your wrist.
“Are we gonna—” Jiyoon starts.
“Say nothing,” you cut her off. “Not a single word about that.”
She giggles to herself. When the game is about to begin, Jiyoon leans forward, hyperfocused on Jisung and the way he carries himself. You want to make fun of her for it, but you know she’ll come back tenfold with jokes about Chenle.
“Also,” Jiyoon whispers, getting closer to you without removing her gaze from the court. “He was totally fucking with you. He just wanted you to wear it. They haven’t lost a game this entire season, so.”
“Why would he do that?” you ask.
This time, she does look at you. She clasps her hands together and stares expectantly.
“Oh, come on. Don’t be ridiculous.” You scoff.
“Dude. His parents are five feet away and he just asked you to be his good luck charm. For a game everyone already knows they’re going to win.” She shakes her head. “Maybe he’ll be good for you.”
“It’s been a day. One day. And I didn’t like him at all for most of it.”
“Yeah, well, you don’t usually like any man on the first meeting, so cut him some slack.” She pats your knee. “But also, the game’s starting, so watch.”
Honestly, you’re not sure what you were expecting. It’s been a long time since you’ve been to a sporting event—especially so for a man, but you try to convince yourself you’re here to spend time with Jiyoon.
But you have to admit, watching Chenle weave around the court is intriguing. He moves with unmatched grace. It looks effortless despite the amount of work you know goes into it. You fiddle with the bracelet on your wrist, chewing on your bottom lip as you concentrate on the way he blocks shots from guys much taller or how he never misses when he passes the ball.
“Told you he was good,” Jiyoon says.
“Sh.” You wave her off.
At one point, Chenle attempts a shot from the middle of the court. You’re hanging onto the details like a lifeline, afraid to even blink and miss something. Much to your surprise, your heart thuds in your chest.
And when the ball goes straight into the net, something launches you to your feet next to Jiyoon as you cheer. Thankfully, the entire section stood, so you didn’t look ridiculous by yourself, but Chenle looks over at you, almost like he’s checking if you saw the points he scored.
You didn’t realize how wide the smile on your face was until you made eye contact with him. Clearing your throat, you brush off your jeans and sit back down in your seat.
“Come on,” Jiyoon whispers. “He’s like…ugh. You should see where it goes.”
Your face burns. “I just like sports, Ji, okay?”
“You dirty liar.” She snorts. “You guys are lab partners anyway, so good luck trying to avoid him. He’s a good guy, he plays sports, he’s smart as hell, and I heard he can sing, actually—”
“I get it,” you grumble. “I’m not interested.”
“You just screamed and cheered when he made the half-court shot. You’re interested.” Jiyoon laughs. “Whatever happens…just let yourself have it, okay? Have a good time. You deserve it.”
Chenle’s team absolutely dominated the other one. They barely scored a couple points the entirety of the game. He didn’t have time to talk to you right when the game finished, as he went back to the locker rooms with the team, but you figured you’d see him at the party anyway.
Mark, Chenle, and Jisung rent a house together near the school, so that’s where their get-togethers take place. He didn’t lie when he said it was more of an intimate get together—only a handful of people were there when you arrived. As much as you would deny looking for Chenle, you spent half an hour doing so, scanning the room back and forth to find his presence, and you were completely lost. On the bright side, Jisung was also MIA, meaning Jiyoon stuck by your side in the kitchen as you made yourself a drink.
You sigh quietly to yourself, the sound almost lost in the music from the living room as you brace your palm on the counter.
“You good?” Jiyoon asks.
“It’s been a while since I’ve been to a party,” you remind her. “You know what happened last time. It just feels…out of place, I guess.”
“Yeah, well, nothing’s gonna happen like last time,” your friend reassures you. “Regardless of who it could be, the guys would never be okay with something like that.”
You tap your fingers, resuming your scan of the room. “They’re not even here.”
“(Y/N).” Jiyoon’s tone catches you off-guard, almost like it’s a bit sharp and pricking at your skin. “I know you don’t know them, but they’re good, okay? They’d never let anything happen to anyone. Let alone someone like you.”
You tilt your cup to your lips, taking a big sip of the fruit punch. When you set it back down, you make eye contact with Chenle, his back pressed against the door frame with his arms over his chest. Your breath hitches at the sight of him. His hair is damp, forehead exposed as the strands stick to the sides of his face. He wears a simple black T-shirt, but something about the way it fits him has every logical thought racing out of your head.
You hated feeling this way. Like you were intimidated by him and the softness of his presence. He made your palms sweat and your mind whirl.
“I’m gonna go find Jisung,” Jiyoon speaks up, bolting past Chenle before you can stop her.
“I didn’t think you’d come.” Chenle pushes himself off the wall, walking over to the counter opposite of you, gaze soft as he looks you over. He hones in on the bracelet on your wrist before flicking his eyes back to yours.
“I probably won’t stay long.” You wet your lips and sigh. “I just feel off.”
“Do you wanna talk about it?” he asks.
“With you?” You blink at him.
He chuckles, running his fingers through his damp hair. “Yeah, with me. There’s a swing out on the patio if you’d feel better away from people. It’s kinda stuffy in here.”
“It’s your party, though,” you remind him. “You just won a game, Captain. That’s a big deal.”
“My lucky charm was there.” He glances down at your wrist again.
Your cheeks burn, and you clasp your hands together behind your back. “The patio sounds nice.”
He gives a small, satisfied grin, and makes his way toward the door to your left. He opens it and waits. You get the hint, shuffling past him to the backyard. His scent—a graceful blend of vanilla and sandalwood—wafts toward you, fresh and strong. Once again, your face reddens at the realization of how much attention you’re giving him.
The porch is wooden, the slats beneath your feet slightly creaking as you walk to the swing. You watch Chenle closely as he follows you, equally relieved and disappointed by how much distance he leaves between the two of you.
You sit in a comfortable silence for a moment, you crossing your legs and Chenle using his feet to propel forward and backward without ever leaving the ground.
Breathing in the night air, you relish in how fresh it feels filling your lungs. Inside, your worries swarmed you, but out here, you’re alright.
Chenle closes his eyes and leans his head back, allowing you a moment or two to appreciate more of him. Your gaze sweeps down his face and over his neck, and you wonder why you’re even paying attention to such things.
“Why don’t you like parties?” he asks.
“It’s not that I don’t like them.” You shrug and pick at the seams on your jeans. “A couple bad experiences just…makes you weary, you know?”
“Sure.” He pauses. “Thanks for coming, by the way. To the game. And the party, too. We didn’t really start off on the right foot, but I’m glad we didn’t leave it there.”
“Oh, speaking of which.” You push your wrist toward him, the blue and gold thread wrapped around it reflecting the light from the opposite side of the window. “You can have this back now.”
“What’ll I do without my good luck charm?” He quirks an eyebrow at you.
You chuckle quietly and roll your eyes. “Jiyoon told me you guys don’t lose either way. I don’t think you need me.”
He tentatively wraps his fingers around your arm. Your gaze darts to his, the breath caught in your throat. You hadn’t expected the warmth from his touch, or the way you swore sparks just whizzed through your skin.
“C’mere,” he murmurs, giving you a gentle tug. “I’ll take it off if that’s what you want.”
You shuffle closer, and without much thought behind it, you’re nearly pressing against him, with your feet planted on the opposite side of his lap. You’re somehow not touching him still, but you’re engulfed in the body heat radiating off of him and the smell of his cologne.
He places your hand on top of your knee and twirls the bracelet around until he finds the knot. “Was it someone I know?” he asks, concentration taking over his tone.
“Who?”
“The guy that somehow convinced you not to go to parties anymore.” Chenle doesn’t look at you when he says it, he continues working away at the thread on your wrist.
“I don’t think so,” you reply, gulping as you pull away until the bracelet is out of his reach. “Not sure you really hang out with that crowd.”
He rests his hand on your knee, his face scrunched as he debates with himself what he should say. “I don’t know the full story, but nobody should control you. Especially not some dude who clearly is a prick. Whatever habits you picked up from him, I really hope you’re able to forget them and be who you want to be.”
“Thanks,” you mutter, not expecting the surge of emotions to hit you until your eyes start welling. You laugh at yourself, shaking your head and taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry. For class today. I’ve learned it’s always better to assume the worst.”
“I noticed.” He smiles, tapping his fingers.
His feet keep the swing moving even with you positioned over him like this. You try to pretend you don’t feel the movement of his sweats against your jeans. What the hell’s gotten into you today?
“Keep the bracelet,” he says. “Can I give you my number? In case you ever need anything?”
You grab your phone out of your back pocket, unlock it, and hand it to him. “Just send yourself a text.” You lean closer while you watch his thumbs dance over the keyboard. His shoulder brushes yours, and when he finishes his text, he looks over at you.
You’re much nearer to him than you anticipated, gulping once you see the swirls of brown in his irises. He wets his lips, fingers splaying out further around your knee. Shifting toward you, he turns ever-so-slightly, his face only inches away from yours.
You’ve known him for less than twenty-four hours, but somehow, you find yourself wanting to kiss him. Maybe it’s from the way his full lips are parted, fresh mint on his breath, or perhaps it’s that odd craving of intimacy you’ve missed since you left Woojin in the first place.
“If you need anything,” he whispers. “Anything at all. Call me, okay?”
You nod, entranced by the little details of him that come together to make him who he is. The cologne. His finally-dried hair parted in the middle. The softness of his touch. His sympathetic stare that doesn’t feel at all like pity, but you can’t place how someone you just met could actually care about you.
“Sorry, for some reason, I just really, really want to—” He’s interrupted by the door opening, the music loud enough to make both of you freeze as if you’re doing something wrong.
“(Y/N), are you out here? Jiyoon said she left you alo—oh.” Soobin halts as soon as she sees you and Chenle. She blinks a few times, like that’ll change the sight in front of her.
“Where’s Heewon?” you ask.
“She went upstairs with Mark.”
Chenle snorts, scratching his forehead. “Girl knows what she wants, huh?”
“She’s not shy,” you reply.
“Are you ready to go?” Soobin asks. “Pretty sure Jiyoon plans on staying with Jisung, so I’m ready if you are.”
Disappointment floods your chest at the thought of cutting your conversation with Chenle short. You look at him to ask what he’d prefer.
“I’ll see you in class tomorrow?”
He smiles softly. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”
You not-so-gracefully swing your legs over his lap to reach the ground, stopping once you’re on your feet to glance back at him. “You sure you don’t want the bracelet back?”
“I like how it looks on you,” he says, shaking his head. “It’s all yours.”
You give him one last smile, and then you walk past Soobin inside. She leads you through the house to the front door, and it’s only when you’re in her car that she looks at you expectantly.
“What was that?” she asks you.
“What was what?”
She glares at you. “Oh, come on. You were on top of him. Your faces were so close I thought I was about to witness you kissing a man.”
“I was not about to kiss Chenle.” You give her a pointed look.
“Oh, my God, and now the man has a name?” Soobin’s face scrunches up. “First, Jiyoon starts dating Jisung, second, Heewon is hopping on Mark’s dick, and I really thought I’d be safe with you, but Chenle?”
“There’s nothing going on between me and him,” you remind her. “He’s my lab partner. And I’m allowed to have friends.”
She opens her mouth to speak, but your phone dings obnoxiously in your lap. You look at it, and when you see the contact name Chenle gave himself, you chuckle.
“Who is it?” Soobin asks.
“Oh, it’s…” you trail off, annoyance creeping in when you realize the reaction you just had to him. “It’s Chenle.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake.” She lets out an exasperated groan. “I’ve already lost the war.”
The next few weeks pass by. You see Chenle in class every day, and he somehow convinced you to go to the games he had over that span of time. Jiyoon hadn’t lied to you—they simply do win every game they have.
It became normal for not only Chenle to eat lunch with you, Heewon, Jiyoon, and Soobin, but Mark and Jisung, too. Seeing Mark actively talking to and hanging out with Heewon shocked you, but you were pleasantly surprised.
You’d grown quite accustomed to Chenle and his friendship, to the point where he always sat next to you, so close that your legs touched. His bracelet was still latched around your wrist. You rarely took it off, and when you did, the second you were able to put it back on, you did.
Jiyoon rests her head on Jisung’s shoulder, and his arm loops around her waist and pulls her tight. Mark whispers something to Heewon, who giggles and pushes his shoulder gently. Soobin sits next to you and Heewon, but the more the latter giggles, the closer to you Soobin scoots.
“(Y/N), you’re coming to the game tonight, right?” Mark asks from across the table.
“Unfortunately, you’ll be without me tonight,” you tell him, bumping your knee against Chenle’s. “I have a big test on Friday. But I’ll be at the party.”
Mark salutes you and gives you an apparent nod of approval. “Don’t know what Chenle will do without his good luck charm.”
“He’ll do just as well as he did before he knew I existed.” You laugh and run your fingers through your hair.
Chenle grabs your hand to look at the thread, gaze darting over to yours as a tiny smirk forms on his lips. “As long as you don’t take this off, I’ll be fine.”
“Right, because if I do, you’ll be so sad you can’t play.” You fake a pout, and his smirk turns into a full-blown grin.
“Broken hearts kill people, (Y/N). Be considerate.”
“Wow, they’re flirting in real time,” Jiyoon says, nodding.
“Weird, because Chenle doesn’t do that in front of us usually,” Jisung mutters back to her.
You crumple up one of the papers in front of you and throw it at your friends, and it bounces right off Jiyoon’s forehead. 
“Nice.” Chenle high fives you, and you laugh at Jiyoon’s narrowed eyes.
Neither of you deny what’s happening, and it makes your stomach twist and turn with something you can’t recognize. Whatever’s happening to you, you don’t hate it, but it makes you nervous. Your heart races in his presence, and any time you’re alone with him, you want to kiss him.
Soobin and Heewon have another class to attend, so Mark offers to walk them there. The three of them stand and say their goodbyes. Mark loops his arm through Heewon’s and watches her fondly as he walks away with her.
“I thought he was a player,” you muse. “Now he’s all over her.”
“No, no,” Chenle replies. “I said he has the highest body count. But when he likes someone, he takes it seriously. He’s not a player or anything, he just happens to like sex.”
You nod in understanding and shrug. “I guess I didn’t think that was possible.”
“I mean, no offense to Heewon at all, but we were surprised he wanted more. Not anything to do with her, but he was just planning on going with the flow for the last couple semesters,” Jisung adds, chewing the inside of his cheek.
“Surprised on behalf of Mark, I get it.” You hold your hands up before dropping them back in your lap. Grabbing your bottle of water, you sip from it.
“And what about you two? You seem awfully close lately. Anything happening behind closed doors?” Jiyoon wiggles her eyebrows, and you full-on choke on your drink.
“Classy,” Chenle says to her, putting his hand on your lower back. “Are you okay?”
“Yep.” You try to clear your throat, your face burning at the realization he hasn’t vehemently denied or confirmed anything. Like he’s not going to answer until you’ve made yours clear.
“It’s a pretty simple question,” Jiyoon replies. “And you guys have been hanging out a lot. And I don’t really think he can say he doesn’t want to—”
His touch is now burning a hole right through the small of your back, and when you tense up, he’s quick to remove it.
“I don’t think we should talk about this,” Chenle interjects, resting his elbows on the table.
“See? That wasn’t a denial.” Jiyoon grins widely as if she’s proud of herself.
Your friend seems acutely aware you haven’t said anything either, and you know this is her way of trying to push you out of your shell. Chenle’s not denying his attraction to you, and you almost prefer it this way. Most people would jump to the ‘no, we’re just friends’ much too quickly for comfort, but it’s clear he’s not going to do anything to confuse you.
“I’ll see you after the game, right?” he asks, gaze soft despite the topic Jiyoon brought up.
You smile at him. “Yeah, of course. If I finish my homework at a decent time, I’ll try to make the game.”
“Cool.” He nods and stands up. “Jisung and I have a class, so I’ll see you later.”
Jisung kisses Jiyoon, placing his hand on the back of her neck. It lasts too long for comfort, which leaves you and Chenle to exchange awkward looks. Jisung pulls away first, pressing another quick peck to her cheek before he stands up and walks away with Chenle.
“I feel like that wasn’t really necessary.” You scrunch your face at her.
“The second you kiss Chenle, you’ll realize how necessary it really is.” Jiyoon grins, reaching into her backpack for a bag of chips. “It’s been a while for you. Live a little. Not that you’ve ever really…had a good experience with that kind of stuff.”
“Ah yes, thank you for the reminder.” You snort, looking over your shoulder to see Chenle and Jisung in the distance. “I will not be kissing Chenle.”
“Why not?”
“Why would I?” you counter.
“Uh, because you like him?”
“Kissing requires both parties wanting it, Ji.” You shuffle through your notebook, absentmindedly looking at your notes.
She frowns at you in silence.
“What?”
“You think that man doesn’t want to kiss you? Or get you undressed?”
“Okay, maybe. But just because we want to doesn’t mean we should. Or that we will.” You close your book and sigh as you look at your friend. “I’m not ready for something like that.”
“Not ready? That’s such a sad excuse and you know it. He’d never treat you like Woojin did.”
“It’s really only been a few months, okay? If he really likes me, he’ll give me time. If not, he’ll move on, and we’ll be the same way we have been for the past few weeks. We’re friends, Ji.” You gather your things to put them in your bag.
“I think you’re just scared he doesn’t want you.” Jiyoon narrows her eyes at you. “Try it. Literally try to kiss him tonight and see what happens.”
“You’re crazy. I will see you at the party.” But as you finally move away from your friend, images of kissing Chenle flash in front of your brain, and you realize how much that really is everything you want.
You were gonna kiss him. After the rest of the afternoon debating with yourself, you decided that was the best course of action. The past be damned, you deserve good things—and if Chenle is one of those things, then so be it.
You’ve been at his house for an hour, hanging out with him, Jisung, Mark, and a handful of other people you didn’t really know. You sat next to him on the couch, his arm loosely thrown over the cushion behind you.
Shifting closer to him, you rest your head on his shoulder, and his grip tightens naturally, his fingertips brushing the skin of your forearm. There’s no way you’ll kiss him in front of a group of people, but you’re not sure how to pull him away. He talks animatedly with his friends, laughing and celebrating their most recent win.
After a few moments, he leans close to whisper in your ear. “You okay?”
“Hm?” You blink at him, turning and nearly forgetting how to breathe when you see how easy it would be to press your lips to his. “Yeah, I’m good.” You lift your drink, but as soon as you do, someone hits Chenle’s arm behind you, and it makes you jolt as well, half of your alcohol pouring down your front. You gasp at the chill, gaping as you stand up.
“What the fuck?” Chenle sits up to put his drink down, throwing a glare over his shoulder to whoever ran into him.
Before you say anything, he’s right next to you with his hand on the small of your back. You allow him to lead you to the stairs, your face hot with embarrassment.
“Sorry, Chenle, I should go home and change—”
“You can just put something of mine on,” he says, opening the first door on the right and allowing you to walk in first.
The room is somewhat bare, beige walls and dark flooring. There’s nothing really showing someone lives here despite the sweatshirt haphazardly thrown over the desk chair. His bed isn’t made, the gray comforter bunched in the middle.
The music fades to background noise when he closes the door behind him. He goes into his dresser and pulls out a black T-shirt. When he hands it to you, you timidly take it from him.
“You can change, I’ll wait for you downstairs,” he tells you, already turning.
“Chenle, wait,” you call out, cringing at how quickly you said it. “Stay. Just…close your eyes or something.”
“Okay.” He frowns in confusion, but nods, facing the opposite direction.
Without wasting any more time, you pull your ruined shirt over your head and exchange it for his. It’s the school’s logo on the front, and even though you don’t look, you know his jersey number and last name are on the back.
Nerves eat away at your stomach as you approach him. Logically, you know he won’t reject you. He likes you just as much as you like him, but something still has you choking on the thought.
You put a hand on one of his shoulders. “Chenle.”
He gulps as he turns back to face you, but you don’t give him the time to say anything. Your hands move from his shoulders up to his face, cupping his cheeks and pulling him toward you. He allows it, gaze meeting yours once before his eyes flutter shut and your mouths meet.
His lips fit so perfectly with yours, it has you sighing against him. He wraps his arms around you, fisting your shirt as if he needs to ground himself. The pace is slow, his body flush to yours as your touch slides into his hair. It’s softer than you imagined it to be, and you just can’t get enough of him.
“Fuck, wait.” Chenle pulls away. “You’re not drunk, are you?”
You slap a hand over your mouth, face on fire as you turn away from him without an answer.
“Don’t go,” he says, reaching out for you. “Look at me and tell me you’re sober so I can kiss you again.”
Your heart skips a beat, and you allow him to pull you back until your chest bumps into his. You put your hands flat on his chest, surprised to find his heart thumping just as hard as your own beneath your palm.
“I think you forgot you made me the one drink I had…half of.” You peer at him through your lashes, the shine of your lip gloss reflecting off his lips.
“You’re so fucking pretty,” he groans, his hand finding the back of your neck.
As soon as his mouth is on yours, your body arches into his, molding into him like you’re an extension of him. You’re not sure exactly what you’re doing, but you know you’ve never felt so comfortable with anyone else before. You move him backward until the backs of his knees press against his bed.
“(Y/N),” he whispers as you push him down until he sits on the mattress.
“Is this okay?” you ask him.
“Yeah,” he mutters breathlessly, pulling at you. “C’mere, Sunshine.”
A shiver runs down your spine as you climb onto his lap, staring right into his eyes while you crave his kiss. You reach up and swipe your thumb across his bottom lip, entranced. “Call me that again.”
“Sunshine.” He presses you as close as possible by the small of your back. “My Sunshine.”
You kiss him, and when you shift on top of him, you gasp at the feeling of him hardening beneath his sweatpants.
“‘M sorry,” he murmurs. “We can stop—”
“Is that what you want?” you ask him, leaning back to look at his face.
He shakes his head, and it’s the first time you’ve ever seen him so nervous. For the most part, Chenle’s a confident man, so seeing him with even the slightest bit of hesitation warms your heart. His vulnerable side is on full display for you, and you’ll be damned if you’re the one who stops this moment.
“But, (Y/N), I need you to know that—”
“Chenle, can you come help? This fucking guy won’t—Oh, shit. My bad.” Mark stands in the doorway, and instead of flying off Chenle’s lap, you bury your head in his neck. He cradles the back of your head as he looks at his friend.
“What’s going on?” Chenle asks.
“Some dude is refusing to leave but he’s been making a couple girls uncomfortable, and I have no idea where Jisung is.”
“Probably in his room with his girlfriend.” His chest rumbles as he narrows his eyes at Mark. “Yeah, I’m coming.”
You move off his lap and sit next to him on his bed. He presses a quick kiss to your cheek.
“I’ll be right back.” And then he’s gone, following Mark downstairs.
You lie flat on his bed, patting your cheeks and fighting off a smile at the thought of what you just did. Amidst your happiness cloud, you don’t realize your phone is vibrating in your pocket until it’s on the last ring. You grab for it, unsure of who would be calling you at a time like this when all of your friends are downstairs.
When you see the screen, you immediately shrink in on yourself. The contact name has been labeled as “don’t answer,” and by that logic, you already know who it is. As soon as you see it, the call stops, and it turns into a notification instead. You anxiously wait for the second call, knowing Woojin better than you’d like to.
Your breath catches in your throat and anxiety sprouts at the base of your spine, and sudden guilt smashes into you when you process what you’ve done with Chenle. Your hands shake as you get a second notification, one that notifies you that you’ve received a voicemail.
You unlock your phone and immediately play the message.
“How fucking stupid do you think I am? Like I haven’t heard what’s going on with you and Chenle. Seriously, (Y/N)? You gonna let the whole basketball team get in your pants, too? He’s not as good as me. I bet every time you’re on his dick, you wish you were with me. You’ll come back when you realize he doesn’t really want you. The second you stop putting out, he’ll drop you so fast, just wait. The thought of you with him makes me so fucking—wait ‘til I fucking see him, and you’ll see. Do you know what you’ve done? You’re such a bitch, you’re pitting people against each other. I’ll get you back.”
The voicemail ends abruptly, and bile rises in your throat. Your eyes well with tears, and you cradle your knees up to your chest, your phone falling onto Chenle’s mattress. You become acutely aware of the way his shirt feels on your skin, and your guilt rages on. You’re not sure how long you’re sitting there before Chenle comes back.
But it doesn’t matter, because you’re hysterical—you can’t understand a word of what he’s saying, and you fight against his grasp like he’s suddenly not the same man you know.
“Hey.” He cups your cheeks, stopping your abrupt movements and forcing you to look into his eyes. “Breathe, talk to me. What the hell just happened?”
Your chest heaves and you stare at him in shock. You’re sure anyone else would have sent you away at the sight of the mess you became in seconds.
“Was it me? Did I do this?” he asks, thumbs stroking your skin.
Your heart pangs in your chest, and you quickly shake your head, unable to open your mouth to explain. Chenle’s face scrunches in relief as his chest deflates.
“Come here.” He tugs at you until you practically fall into his lap. You curl into him, and he lets you cry on his shoulder.
“Sorry,” you choke out, gripping onto his sleeve. “I wanted tonight to—”
“Don’t do that,” he says. “You don’t need to apologize to me. Can you…please tell me what happened?”
You’re almost too embarrassed to tell him about the message. He’d find out things about your past, and it might change his opinion of you. Although, the concern in his gaze as he wipes your tears away becomes enough convincing. This is Chenle. You trust him, inexplicably.
“Voicemail,” you whisper, jaw quivering all over again.
Chenle kisses your forehead and reaches for your phone. You feel queasy as he finds what he’s looking for and puts the device up to his ear. Faintly, you hear it play. You watch Chenle’s face closely, waiting for the disgust to show like you expect.
Instead, as the recording finishes, his jaw clenches, fire raging in his brown eyes. He tosses your phone to the side and tugs you closer to his chest. You sniffle, and his grip tightens on you. He’s rigid, unmoving except for his hand that runs through your hair.
“Chenle, I haven’t said anything about you to anyone.” You look up at him. “I don’t know where he heard any of that from, ‘cause I’d never spread rumors.”
“I didn’t think you did,” he says, tone soft. “I don’t think any part of that is your fault.”
“You’re not mad?”
“At you?” he asks incredulously. “Of course, I’m not mad at you. His actions can’t be blamed on you.”
For the first time since you received that call, your heart calms. You stare at him, lips parted in shock, and wait for the other shoe to drop. Wiping the rest of your tears, you clear your throat. Fear creeps up your spine, and the only thing on your mind is not scaring him off. Not doing anything to rock the boat so you can keep him, because you’ve already unknowingly fallen for him.
You sniffle, readjusting yourself on his lap so you’re straddling him again. He looks at you in confusion, but his hands find purchase on your hips. You tangle your fingers in his hair, swallowing the reproach you feel toward this situation, and kiss him like the past half an hour doesn’t exist. He returns the gesture, but it’s not like it was earlier. The passion has all but drained, and his touches are tentative.
He pulls away, eyes scanning over your face. “What are you doing?”
“What we were supposed to do in the first place,” you mention, grinding down on him.
He opens his mouth to speak, but a quiet curse comes out instead. Your hands shake as you reach down to the hem of your shirt and tug it over your head. Like Woojin said, as long as you’re giving Chenle what he wants, he won’t leave you.
“Stop,” Chenle breathes out, making you freeze above him.
“What’s wrong?”
“I can’t do this right now.” He drops his head into his palms. “Is this about the voicemail? You think you have to do this for me?”
Your silence is the only answer he needs.
“God, what the hell?” He removes you from his lap and stands up, tugging his fingers through his hair in frustration.
“Don’t go. Please.” Your voice is so small, you barely recognize it. “I’ll do better. Whatever you—”
“No.” He strides over to you and helps you to your feet, hands cupping your face as he kisses your forehead. “No, baby, I’m not going anywhere, promise. I just need a second, okay?”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. Let’s get your shirt back on.” He leans down to grab the black fabric off the floor and helps you pull it back on.
“Chenle,” you whisper.
“Yeah?” His eyebrows pinch together as he looks at you.
“Did you…want to?” You cringe at how small you sound. “Earlier, at least. You wanted me?”
“I did. I do. But I want you to want it, too,” he explains. “You shouldn’t ever feel like you have to do something you don’t want to, especially not things like that. No real man would ever ask you for that.”
“Thank you,” you say, taking a deep breath. “Can I stay with you tonight? Please?”
“I’d prefer it that way, actually.” He chuckles. “I’m gonna be right back, okay? Gonna tell Mark to end the party now, and I’ll be right back. You’ll be okay by yourself?”
You nod, and surprisingly, you actually mean it.
“If you don’t want to sleep in your jeans, you can get a pair of sweats from my dresser.” He kisses your cheek before heading downstairs.
While he’s gone, you change out of your jeans, a dull ache in your head from the sobbing. After you have his sweats on, you climb into bed and slide beneath his comforter. You’re surrounded by his scent like this. You want to melt into the sheets and never leave, surrounded by everything he has to offer all the time.
When he comes back, he locks his door behind him and lays down next to you. He doesn’t make any moves to pull you close, so you take the initiative and bury your head in his chest, wrapping an arm around his middle.
“Get some rest,” he whispers. “I’m sorry you have to deal with that piece of shit.”
“I’ll be okay,” you tell him, sighing. “I have you now.”
His grip is firm on you when you wake up, the steady rising and falling of his chest telling you he’s fast asleep. You sigh in content. You’d never really understood what people meant before, when they said things about not being able to get close enough. He’s pressed flush against you, but you feel as if it’s not enough.
You have no idea if your friends are here, but you carefully crawl out of bed so as to not disturb Chenle. Rubbing your eyes, you grab your phone to check your notifications. Jiyoon texted you a few times to ask if you’d gotten home okay. She’d been upstairs long before you, so it doesn’t surprise you she has no idea you stayed with Chenle.
He stirs with a short groan, but doesn’t open his eyes. You bite back a smile at the softness of his face. His cheek is smooshed into the pillow, and you’re surprised by the odd urge to kiss all over him. Instead, you opt to go into the kitchen for some water.
When you walk in the room, you’re met with Jisung, Jiyoon, and Heewon. Your friends blink at you in surprise, and Jisung laughs to himself.
“Think we found her.” He nudges Jiyoon.
“You could’ve just responded to my text and told me you got dick last night.” Jiyoon throws her hands up in exasperation.
“Nothing happened.” You shrug. “Jisung, water bottles?”
He points to the fridge, you give him a thumbs up, and then you grab one, twisting the cap off and sipping from it.
“You dirty liar, you’re in his clothes.” Heewon narrows her eyes at you. “His last name is on your back.”
“I spilled alcohol on my clothes,” you reply. “Mark was there, ask him.”
“Nothing happened?” Jiyoon asks. “Nothing at all? Not even some light petting or you know, head?”
You glare at her. “You’re such a perv.”
“Mark said he saw something last night,” Heewon blurts out. “And then I said, what? My sweet, innocent (Y/N) would never do something like that. But then I thought about it, and it obviously had to be you because Chenle wouldn’t randomly take another girl in his room.”
“Oh, my God.” Your face heats up. “Yeah, we kissed, but that’s it. Let me breathe before you start interrogating me.”
Jiyoon exclaims in excitement, shaking Jisung’s arm. “They finally fucking kissed!”
You grab a second bottle for Chenle, and then you make your way back toward the stairs.
“Wait!” Jiyoon calls. “You have to give me the details. You can’t just drop that on us and then leave!”
You turn toward her, giving her a pointed look. “Not telling you anything. I’m going back upstairs.”
“Yeah, go kiss Chenle again.” Jiyoon snickers.
“Maybe I will.” You whirl around, gasping mid-laugh when you smack right into Chenle’s chest. Embarrassment shoots through you as one of the water bottles tumbles from your hand. “Oh, I was just about to—”
“Kiss me again?” His lips form the tiniest smirk.
“Water. For you. But—”
“It’s okay, I’ll do it for you.” His palm finds the back of your neck, pushing you closer to him so he can connect your lips. You immediately melt into him, the other bottle falling as you wrap your arms around his shoulders.
The only thing that pulls you away from him in that moment is the obnoxious sound of Jiyoon and Heewon cheering behind the two of you. Your face burns, and you put your palms flat on his chest.
“Good morning.” You clear your throat.
“Would’ve been better with you in my bed instead of the kitchen,” he whispers in your ear.
“Hey, hey! No secrets.” Jiyoon pouts.
“Sorry, she’s very convinced we’re…you know.” You purse your lips. “Did you want to stay down here?”
“Came to see if you were still here,” he admits. “I’d much rather be upstairs with you right now.”
You glance over your shoulder at your friends and Jisung, glaring at them before returning your attention back to Chenle. “My peaceful attempt to get water was thwarted by my loser friends assuming we had sex.”
“You’ve got some nosy friends.” He grabs the water bottles from the floor and gestures back up the stairs. “Exactly why we lock doors in this house.”
When you get to class the next day, you’re surprised that Chenle’s nowhere to be found. He hadn’t mentioned anything to you, so you grab your phone and send him a quick text. Half of the class passes by before you start to worry. He hasn’t messaged you back, and he’s still not here.
You walk up to your professor, fidgeting with your hands. “Excuse me, sorry if this is weird, but did Chenle email or anything about not being here?”
“Not that I’m aware of,” she replies. “But I do think the basketball team had something planned for today. If you’re looking for him, he may be in the gym.”
You nod at her to thank her, and then you do exactly as she says. It’s unlike him to be MIA all day, and you’re sure he wouldn’t be upset seeing you, so why not?
You’re not expecting the room to be so full when you walk in. You don’t see him immediately, but you see Jiyoon and Jisung, so you approach them.
Jiyoon spots you first, confusion sprouting on her features. “(Y/N)? What are you doing here?”
“Um.” You blush, suddenly embarrassed that you came all this way to find Chenle. “Have you heard from Chenle? He wasn’t in class and he wasn’t responding, so…”
“You’re so cute when you worry,” Jiyoon says, nudging your shoulder. “Yeah, the captains of the sports teams do this once a year or whatever. He’s been here all day.”
“Oh, okay, well, I’m gonna head to lunch. Are you coming?” You tilt your head and adjust your bag.
“Heewon’s here, too. You didn’t know about this?”
You frown, taken aback by everyone knowing what’s going on but you. It gives you an uneasy feeling, your stomach twisting.
The door on the far end opens, and Chenle walks through, clearly frustrated at whatever he just witnessed back there. His anger melts the second he sees you, and he makes his way over.
He pulls you into a hug. “What’re you doing here?”
“I…” You pause, throwing one of your arms around him. “You weren’t in class, and our professor said you might be here. I’m a little confused.”
Chenle glances around before he gestures toward the door. “C’mon, I’ll explain.”
You let him lead you away from Jiyoon and Jisung. Once you’re far enough from the crowd, he grabs your hand.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about this,” he tells you. “I just…I figured you knew, but this is a schoolwide event. Which means everyone on a sports team is here, and I didn’t want you to feel pressured to come knowing—”
“Zhong, not inviting your girlfriend to things? Isn’t that frowned upon?”
You freeze at the sound of that voice, and suddenly, everything makes sense. Chenle runs his tongue over his teeth, immediate irritation sparking on his face.
“Didn’t we just have a conversation about you being around her, Woojin?” His body tenses as he turns toward the other man. “Don’t make me get us both in trouble before such an important week.”
He stands directly in front of you, blocking your view of the man. You hold onto the back of his T-shirt and tug gently to tell him it’s not worth it.
“Well, if she’s over me, what does it matter if she sees me? Are you scared you’ll lose out to a better man?” Woojin’s tone seeps with misplaced confidence. “C’mon, she’s not that good to where you have to get so defensive.”
Chenle quickly moves forward, making you lose your grip on him. Fortunately, Jisung and Mark jump in, hands on his shoulders to push him back.
“Hey, calm down,” Mark says in his ear. “We can’t play without our captain.”
Jiyoon and Heewon shuffle past the boys over to you, but you’re focused more on Chenle than yourself at this point.
“C’mon, let’s go,” Jiyoon says, tugging at your arm. “Let Chenle handle it.”
“What? No, he’s clearly not handling it. I’m okay.” You move around Mark to stand in front of Chenle, not sparing Woojin a glance. Despite the uneasiness you feel, you care more about calming him down than giving Woojin the satisfaction of a response from you.
You put your hand on his chest, and his anger all but dissipates when he looks at you. His eyes soften, and he nods at his friends so they’ll let him go.
“I’ll be back,” Chenle says. “I’m gonna take her home.”
“You don’t have to leave for me.” You grin up at him. “I’ll make it fine by myself. I shouldn’t have come.”
“Trust me, I need a walk.” He brushes his pants off and puts his arm around you, guiding you in the opposite direction. The glare he throws at Woojin would be enough to send chills down your spine if it was directed at you.
Once you’re out in the fresh air, you finally feel like you can breathe. Chenle’s still tense as he walks you through the courtyard.
“Are you okay?” you ask him. “I’m sorry, I should’ve just waited to hear from you, but I was worried.”
“Don’t apologize. You have nothing to be sorry for, you’re not the one who’s an asshole.” He pulls you tighter and kisses the side of your head. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m good.” You nod, looking down at your feet as you walk.
He pauses, fingers tapping against your skin. “I’m really not mad at you. I wanted you there, but I didn’t want you to be in a situation like that. So, if anything, I should’ve told you about what I was doing today. I didn’t mean to make you worry.”
You stop, frowning at him. He tilts his head at you and raises his eyebrows in confusion.
“You did that for me?”
He gives you a small smile. “It definitely wasn’t for me. If I was being selfish, I would’ve brought you.”
Instead of responding, you tangle your fingers in his hair and kiss him. He finally relaxes and rests his hand on the small of your back.
He drops his head on your shoulder, sighing. “Don’t wanna go back. Do you care if I just stay with you for the day?”
“Well, you missed our assignment directions, so I think you probably should.” You intertwine your fingers with his and resume your journey.
You and Chenle end up in your room, and he sits next to you on your bed while you shuffle through your papers from today. He shifts, spreading his legs to pull you between them, his arms squeezing around your middle.
“He makes me want to commit murder. I can only imagine how you feel.” He breathes you in.
You chuckle, leaning back on his chest. “Honestly? I just wanted you. I didn’t care about him or whatever he was saying. Plus, he has no idea what he’s talking about. He sucks.”
“Oh, that’s working,” he murmurs. “Tell me all about how he sucks, please.”
“He never let me go to parties. Couldn’t have a simple conversation with any man that wasn’t him. Always hung out with his friends instead of me. I had to ask permission if I wanted to do anything. Even if it was with Jiyoon or Heewon.” Your face heats up, and you’re glad he can’t see you. “He talks about being this great man but he never actually…took care of me.”
Chenle tenses all over again. “What?”
“Uh.” You clear your throat and shake your head. “Nothing.”
“No, no, sorry, I shouldn’t have done that,” he says. “I’m just…I guess I shouldn’t really be surprised, huh? Any man that talks like that probably doesn’t even know how to use his parts.”
“Yeah, he kinda sucks.”
“I’m stuck between wanting to kick his ass or showing you what it feels like.” He kisses where your neck meets your shoulder. “Is he the only guy you’ve been with?”
Your thighs clench together at the sudden heat you feel, and you gulp, nodding. “I mean, I’ve…done things to myself. But yeah. He’s the only one.”
“I…” His eyelashes flutter against your skin. “God, I could kill him.”
You turn your head until you meet his gaze, heart pounding in your chest as you work up the courage to say what you want. His eyes dart down to your mouth before he wets his lips.
You trace your finger over his cheekbone, shifting back against him. “Why don’t you stop thinking about him and show me?”
He kisses you hard, hands clenching at the fabric of your shirt. You try to move so you can straddle his lap, but he tightens his grip instead.
“Relax, baby,” he murmurs. “You don’t have to do anything. Just lay back and let me take care of you, yeah?”
“Are you sure? I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
“Do you want me to touch you?” Chenle’s hand slides down to the button of your jeans, and your breath catches in your throat.
“If you want—”
“Do you want me to touch you?” he repeats. “I’m not doing it if you don’t want it.”
“Yes.” You look into his eyes. “Please.”
“There you go.” He gives you a small smile as he pops the button and unzips the zipper. “Lift up for me for a second? Wanna get these off of you.”
You do as he asks, and he pushes the fabric down to your knees. With anyone else, you’d feel embarrassed to be seen this way, but Chenle’s lips against your neck and fingertips exploring your bare thighs has you forgetting all about it.
You lean back on him, already panting at the thought of him so close to where you want him. He traces along the hem of your panties before tracing down to your core, ghosting from your entrance to your clit. You bite your lip to stop yourself from making a sound.
“You can stop me whenever if you want to, okay? Don’t think you have to do this because you already said yes.” He rubs tentative circles on you with just enough pressure to have you squirming.
“I want it,” you tell him. “I want you.”
“I know, baby. I’m letting you know it’s okay if you change your mind.” His cock is hard already, digging into you back as he presses a little harder.
This time, you can’t hold back the moan fluttering past your lips. You put your hand over your mouth, and he uses his other hand to pull at your wrist.
“Let me hear you.” His voice is deeper than you’re used to, thick with want for you. “Tells me if I’m doing a good job.”
He stops his movements to slide his hand beneath your panties. His fingers move to your entrance, and he curses under his breath and the feeling of your wetness. You cry out when he slips them inside you, not sure what to do with your hands as your eyes roll.
“Good?” he asks, kissing along your neck. His body radiates heat. It pours into you, your chest heaving while you reach up to tangle your fingers in his hair and kiss him hard.
“More,” you whimper.
His tongue enters your mouth, delicately wrestling with yours. He pumps his hand faster, his palm finding your clit with every thrust. You’re embarrassed by the way your legs shake, but you don’t break the kiss. Your hips buck up, a knot forming in your stomach that you’ve only ever felt by yourself. It’s more intense when it’s Chenle, the butterflies swarming around the closer you get.
He curls his fingers, finding your spot. You squirm and moan as your high takes you, your grip on his hair tightens while you grind down. While you float on the cloud he created for you, he moves slowly to bring you back down to earth, and he kisses all over your face. He gently removes his fingers and wipes them on his shirt.
“God, I wanna fucking eat you out so bad,” he pants. “Fuck.”
You push your jeans off the rest of the way and turn around to straddle his lap. His hands find your hips, holding you away from the noticeable bulge in his shorts.
You frown. “What about you?”
“Baby, I’m good. I’m just gonna go take care of it in the bathroom.”
“You don’t want me to—” Your chest deflates.
“That’s not it.” He chuckles breathlessly. “I promise you, the only thing I want more than being inside you right now is making sure you know that me doing things for you doesn’t mean you have to for me, too.”
You’re silent for a moment, blinking at him as he traces shapes on your hips.
“Are you okay?” he asks.
“I—I think I’m in love with you,” you say it so quietly, you barely hear the words yourself.
His eyes widen, and within seconds, he’s pulling you in for another kiss. He cradles the back of your head as he flips you over. Resting between your legs, his lips work on yours like he’s never kissed you before.
When he pulls away, your face is still on fire from your confession.
“I’m so sorry,” you tell him. “I don’t know why I’d say something like that, and you don’t have to—”
“I love you, too,” he cuts you off, smiling. “Give me, like, five minutes, Sunshine. I’ll be right back.”
Before you protest, he’s jumping away from you and heading into the bathroom. You splay out on your bed, giggling to yourself as you replay what happened in your head. The thought of him taking care of himself in there has your imagination wandering dangerously. You start to wonder what would happen if you offered to help him.
You finally decide to get up and grab a pair of sweatpants from your dresser. As soon as you have them secured on you, Chenle comes out of the bathroom. He wraps his arms around you, pulling your back to his chest.
“Sorry you had to do that,” you murmur, taking a deep breath.
“It’s not the first time,” he admits, chuckling.
Your jaw drops and you turn to look at him. “Seriously?”
“The world will fall to its knees when you finally accept how fucking perfect you are.” He kisses the tip of your nose. “Come lay down with me. We’ll worry about homework later, yeah?”
You curl into his chest when you join him on your bed, legs tangling with his. He runs his fingers through your hair, pressing his lips to the top of your head. A giddy feeling runs rampant in your chest, and all you want is to stay here forever with him.
“Thank you,” you whisper to him, squeezing his waist.
“You don’t have to do that.” His reply makes his chest rumble. “I promise I’ll always treat you the way you deserve.”
“I don’t doubt that for a second,” you hum, closing your eyes.
His heart thrums in his chest, the sound filling your ears and calming you despite how fast it is. You make him as nervous as he makes you, and that thought alone puts a smile on your face.
He gives you a sense of calm you haven’t felt in a long time—you’re safe.
For a week, you don’t see Chenle except in class. It disappoints you, but as his championships approach, he’s been practicing nonstop. He offered to come over after his practices, but he’d be stumbling in past midnight, so you declined.
You’re getting ready for bed when you hear a knock on your door. Hesitating, you’re not sure who would be at your place, let alone knocking. You check your phone to make sure you didn’t miss any texts, and then you look out the peephole.
You recoil at the sight of Woojin, stumbling back until you bump into your table. What the hell was he doing at your house.
“(Y/N), open the door.” He has to be shouting. His voice is much too clear. “I just wanna talk to you. I know Chenle’s not here, babe, let me in.”
Your first instinct is to grab your phone out of your pocket, but you’re not sure what you plan on doing.
“Let me in or I’ll find a way in without your help,” Woojin warns.
You turn away and bolt back to your room, closing it and locking it before your first instinct is to dial Chenle’s number.
“I was just about to call you,” he answers. “We got out early so I was gonna see if—”
“Woojin’s outside.” Your voice warbles as you try to stand steady, tugging your fingers through your hair. “He said he’s gonna find a way in, and I don’t remember if all the windows are locked or—”
“Hey, hey, listen to me, okay? I’m on my way. Go to your room and lock the door. I’ll be before you know it. He’s not going to get to you.” His tone switches from lighthearted to dead serious, but somehow still comforting despite the situation.
“Chenle—”
“I know, baby. Make sure your door is locked.”
Woojin pounds on the front door more, and you drop your phone.
“If you think he’ll make it before I get to you, you’re wrong. This could’ve been fucking easy, (Y/N)!” A cold edge takes over Woojin, and tears well in your eyes.
This man was forcing his way into your house, and fear paralyzes you from head to toe. You can’t move, no matter how much you try. At least the noise alerts you to where he is, but when the silence sets in, you feel bile in your throat.
You sit on the floor, cradling your knees to your chest as you rock back and forth as your only option for response. Nothing changes, and suddenly, you hear a familiar voice through your bedroom door.
“(Y/N)? It’s Mark, are you okay? Chenle’s outside.”
It’s not enough. You can’t speak or move to unlock the door, and you don’t want Mark.
“He’s taking care of it,” Mark continues.
After more silence, he seems to get that you’re not going to respond to anyone but Chenle.
A few more minutes pass, and a light knock sounds.
“(Y/N), open the door,” Chenle says softly. “I’m here, Sunshine. Come see me.”
You pick yourself up off the floor and make your way over to the door, unlocking it but not having enough energy to open it. As soon as he hears it, he’s in your room and wrapping you up in his arms.
“Are you okay?” He kisses the top of your head, his heart pounding in his chest. Pulling back, he grabs your face, wiping away the tears you don’t recall shedding.
“He tried to—” You choke on your words, opting to bury yourself in his grasp instead.
And then you see his hands, some of his knuckles split and bleeding. You gasp and grab his wrists, gaping at his injuries.
“Chenle, what did you do?”
“Just taught him a lesson is all,” he tells you, shaking his head. “I want you to come stay with us for a little while, okay?”
“Huh?”
“I want you to pack a bag and come stay with me, Sungs, and Mark for a while.”
“I can’t do that.” You put your hands on his shoulders. “You said you handled it, right?”
“Please?” He cups both your cheeks. “It’ll make me feel better. I know he won’t try anything there.”
Reluctantly, you agree, and he helps you gather your things. He insists on carrying it for you, and he leads you through your house. When you make it outside, you see a handful of people you don’t know and Mark and Jisung. You turn to look at Chenle.
“Is…is this the whole basketball team?” you ask.
“We were all leaving when you called. They offered to help.” He shrugs.
You’re exhausted by the time you make it to Chenle’s. Jiyoon and Heewon are already there, and when they see you, the looks on their faces tell you everything you need to know. Chenle guides you upstairs without a word.
“Chenle,” you mutter after he closes the door.
“Yeah?”
“I don’t wanna talk about it, okay?” You fight your tears and grab his hands. “Let me help you clean up, and then I just want to go to bed.”
“Anything you need.” He kisses your forehead.
“Do you have a first-aid kit?” You sniffle and wipe at your eyes.
He leads you into his bathroom and grabs a plastic case from under the sink and a bottle of hydrogen peroxide. Sliding onto his counter, you spread your legs to allow him room close to you. You don’t say another word, you just get to work. He flinches when you wipe his wounds, and you sigh at the amount of damage done. All of it for you? It didn’t make sense.
“I’m sorry,” he tells you, staring down at your movements. “It just makes me…so mad that he thinks he can get away with trying to hurt you. So, I’m sorry if I hurt you by doing that, but I’m not sorry for protecting you.”
“You brought the whole team.” You chuckle and kiss his cheek.
“You’re important to me, and by definition, that makes you important to them, too.” He shrugs and pulls his hands away from you to grip the edge of the counter. “You’re safe with them.”
“I wasn’t done,” you scold him, but you enjoy his warmth anyway.
Chenle shakes his head. “Just let me look at you for a sec.”
You’re sure your face is puffy, eyes bloodshot from tears you barely remember, but he stares at you so fondly you forget all about it. He gives you the faintest smile.
“Come to bed with me?” His voice is so soft, like he’s afraid of any louder octave breaking you into pieces.
You cup his cheeks, stroking his skin with your thumbs. “What if it gets infected?”
“It won’t,” Chenle reassures you. “I’m exhausted. And I have class in the morning.”
You nod, and he takes a step back to allow you to get down. Following him into his bedroom, you feel how heavily sleep tugs on you, too. You sit on the edge of his bed as he moves his comforter so he can get under it. Watching him over your shoulder, you appreciate how soft he looks. All you want is to be close to him at all times. Whenever he’s away from you, the air is so much colder.
Chenle wraps his arm around you and pulls you to his chest so you can curl into him. “I love you. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.”
“I love you, too. And you got to me in time, that’s all that matters.” Your mouth brushes his gently at first, and then you allow him to part your lips with his tongue. 
Despite that and the way he holds you so tightly, there’s no real heat behind this. You wrap your leg around his waist, and his hand moves down to your ass. Sighing, you shuffle again, getting lost in his kiss and the feeling of his hands all over you.
He squeezes you, making a short moan escape your lips. Resting his forehead against yours, he closes his eyes.
“We should stop.”
“You’re the one touching me,” you point out, tracing your thumb along his bottom lip. “We can stop if you want to, but I want it. So, don’t stop on my behalf.”
He rolls his hips toward you, pressing his hardening cock against your clothed entrance. “Does it feel like I want to stop?”
“I want you so bad.” You sigh as you grind on him. “I haven’t stopped thinking about you since—” Your face heats up at your confession, but he smiles.
“I let you cum one time, and now this,” he teases you, biting back a wider grin.
You smack his shoulder. “It felt good.”
“It’s supposed to,” he retorts. “And if you’re ever with me and you don’t finish, you’d better tell me. Because I’ll make it happen.”
“I haven’t finished yet.” You continue grinding on him, his hardness sliding perfectly against you.
He massages your ass, the pressure of it slotting him firmly between your legs. You kiss him hard and let out a shuddering breath at the stimulation of your clit through your pants and underwear. His teeth sink into your bottom lip, and he tugs until you let out a short whine.
“God, I don’t wanna have you for the first time while Mark and Jisung can hear,” he groans, burying his head in your neck. “Need to hear how I’m making you feel.”
“So let me just take care of you.” You move your hand down his body until you squeeze his bulge.
“You don’t have to,” he says, voice strained.
“If I want to?” you ask.
He inhales sharply, but doesn’t exhale. “Whatever you want, Sunshine.”
“Close your eyes and relax.” You kiss him gently before moving beneath the blanket.
He shifts onto his back, and you pull his pants down enough to palm him over his boxers. A short gasp leaves his lips. That’s enough for you to decide to slide your hand inside and grip his length. He throbs as your thumb rubs over the tip.
You're more nervous than you’d care to admit, but when you put the head in your mouth and suck, his low curse is all you need. You sink down further, attempting to relax your throat to take him deeper. He struggles to keep quiet, his moans sending bursts of wetness to your core.
You grab his hand, finding it fisted into the sheets, and bring it to your hair, hoping he’ll get the message. He immediately starts guiding your head up and down on his cock, and the slight sting from his movements has you moaning around him.
“Gonna cum,” he warns you. “Fuck, baby, your mouth is so good.”
You dig your nails into his thigh, sinking all the way down until your eyes water from gagging on him. With one last groan, he spills down your throat. You swallow what you can, climbing out from under the blanket while he readjusts himself in his pants.
“You’re fucking killing me,” he groans, reaching up to wipe the corner of your mouth. Before he moves away from you, you take his thumb in your mouth and suck.
“Feel better?” You quirk an eyebrow at him.
He shifts, laying you on your back so he can settle between your legs. You’re a little surprised when he kisses you hard, tongue and all, considering you swallowed his load, but he doesn’t seem to care about that.
“Your turn,” he mutters, kissing and nipping along your neck.
“You shouldn’t.” You run your fingers through his hair. “Your hands are—”
“Oh, baby.” He chuckles. “I don’t need my hands for what I’m about to do to you.”
“What happened to not having to do things just because the other person did?” You chuckle as he plays with the hem of your pants.
“You fucking earned it.” He nips your collarbone. “Plus I’ve wanted to taste you for so long. So, really, this is for me, too.”
“That feels backwards.”
He lifts your shirt up so his lips can graze your skin on the way down, tongue dancing along. Your breathing becomes uneven from the anticipation. With him between your legs, you can’t move to create the friction you crave.
“Is this okay?” he asks you.
You nod, helping him remove your panties. His gaze darkens as he sees your core, surely slick with your arousal. The pause he takes is minimal, and within seconds, he’s licking a broad stripe up your core. Your hand flies to his hair, whining as your back arches. He sucks your clit into his mouth, tongue flicking it fast. His arms wrap around your thighs to stop them from clenching around his head, and his nails digging into your skin amplifies your pleasure.
You squirm beneath him, moaning as he dips into your entrance. His nose nudges your sensitive bud, and you wonder how you’ve gone this long without feeling this kind of pleasure. Lewd sounds emanate from where he’s attached to you as he works your entrance like he’s done it a hundred times.
You look at him, at the sight between your legs, and feel a whole new burst of heat between your legs. It feels like a rubber band is being pulled tight in your stomach, and you know damn well how soon it’ll snap.
The second his gaze flicks up to yours while his mouth is attached to your core, your orgasm hits you hard. Your back arches as your hips buck, and you tug hard on his hair until he’s moaning against you.
He doesn’t let up, helping you ride out your high before he starts to slow his pace. When you’ve come down from it, he separates from you, sitting up on his knees to get a good look. His lips glisten with your arousal, and you wet your lips at the thought of the evident bulge in his pants.
“Not tonight, baby.” He wipes his face with the back of his hand. “Not with them in the house, and not after everything.”
He grabs you a clean pair of panties, sliding them up your legs before he kisses you deeply. You moan at the taste of yourself.
Once you nod, he practically collapses on top of you, his head resting on your chest. You like feeling the weight of him and his warmth, so you wrap your arms around him and hold him while you will your heart to calm down.
In the morning, Chenle kisses all over your face to wake you. You groan, pushing at him despite only wanting him closer.
“I have to get to class,” he tells you. “And I have practice later, but I’m gonna leave a little early.” His lips trail to a sensitive spot below your ear.
“Leave practice early?” You fake disappointment. “Why would the captain leave early?”
“Because the captain is tired of his roommates being home when all he wants is alone time with his girlfriend. So, he’s gonna take some time to do the things he’s been dreaming of the past few weeks.” He drops his weight on top of you, resting his head on your chest. “If that’s okay with her, of course.”
“Oh? What things?”
He smirks up at you. “I’m gonna take you on a date, and then, if you’re up for it, I really, really wanna be inside you all fucking night.”
Your face heats up at the bluntness of his confession, but you nod.
“Just for bonus points, I’ll tell Mark and Jisung not to come home tonight, yeah?” He lifts himself up on his palms until he’s hovering over you.
“Why don’t you stay here, and we can be without them all day?”
“I have a test.” He sighs, placing one last kiss on your collarbone. “If that were an option, I’d’ve already picked it.”
Chenle pats your hip before rolling out of bed. He’s already changed into jeans and a T-shirt, but you admire him anyway. You turn to your side and curl into the blanket, planning on staying in that very spot until he comes back.
“I’ll see you later.” He grabs his backpack and heads for the door, glancing once more over his shoulder before he disappears. Even though he closes the door behind him, it doesn’t take long for it to open again, Jiyoon poking her head through.
“Hey.” She gives you a nervous smile. “How are you feeling?”
“I’ve been worse,” you reply, sitting up. Pursing your lips, you remember your pants are on the other side of the room. Jiyoon notices at the same time you do.
“Y’know, I thought I heard something last night,” Jiyoon jokes, sitting at the foot of the bed. “But then I was like, no way. (Y/N) is celibate.”
“Oh, come on. Celibate?” You glare at her.
She holds her hands up in mock surrender. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me the second it happened.”
“It hasn’t. That’s why you haven’t heard about it.” You shrug.
“That explains why it’s only your pants.” She frowns. “Why’s it taking so long?”
“It’s only been a couple months, Ji.”
“Yeah. That’s like six years in guy time.”
“We’ve done…stuff. Just not that.”
“Oh, my God, wait! I have to get Heewon before you spill.” Jiyoon squeals in excitement and runs out of the room.
You fall back against the pillow and sigh. As much as you want to tell them, you also want to keep it to yourself. It feels…private. Magical. Something only shared between you and Chenle.
They’ll ask you questions about him—and you’ll only ever be able to answer in one way. He’s perfect, and every second you spend with him makes you want more.
You end up in the living room with them after changing your clothes for the day. Jiyoon ordered pizza, and shortly after Chenle left, Mark and Jisung head out for practice.
But Chenle comes back a lot earlier than you expected. You, Jiyoon, and Heewon share an awkward glance. It must be right after his class, considering it’s only been an hour and a half.
“I thought he said he was still going to practice?” Jiyoon whispers.
You shrug. “Yeah, he did.”
He exchanges a look with you, and you realize immediately that he’s not happy. Shaking his head, he turns and immediately heads upstairs.
“Did he look upset to you guys?” you whisper.
“I think he wants you to go with him,” Jiyoon replies, pushing your arm.
“I’ll be right back.” You wipe your hands off on your napkin before following him to his bedroom. He’s on his way back out when you make it up there.
“What are you doing?” he asks.
“Checking on you,” you tell him. “You’re back early and you don’t seem happy, so I wanted to make sure you’re good. Why aren’t you going to practice?”
“Why would I practice if I can’t play in the game?” He raises his eyebrows at you.
“What do you mean you can’t play?” you shoot back, eyes widening. “Is this because of me?”
“No, it’s not your fault.” He wets his lips. “I don’t really wanna talk about it right now. Let’s just go downstairs, yeah? If I don’t get to hold you, I might go crazy after everything today.”
You nod and intertwine your fingers with his. “Yeah, of course.”
When the two of you take your seats, you motion at Jiyoon to tell her not to ask him any questions. You sit next to him with your legs over his lap, and his thumb rubs your thigh through your jeans.
You rest your head on his shoulder, listening to whatever story Heewon is telling. When you look over at him, he’s relaxed back on the cushion, eyes closed. You know something’s bothering him, but you don’t want to push or make him feel uncomfortable by prying. Instead, you shuffle closer to him.
He pulls you onto his lap, squeezing his arms around you and letting out a long sigh. It worries you more than you’ll admit, and when you glance over at your friends, they’re talking to each other in hushed voices.
“We’ve got a class,” Jiyoon says, standing up with Heewon. “We’re gonna head out. Talk to you later?”
“Yeah, of course.” You smile at her, and then quickly mouth ‘sorry’ before she waves you off like it’s no big deal.
Once they’re out of the door, you look back at Chenle, shifting so you’re straddling his lap to allow you a good view of him.
He runs his fingers through his hair, gaze traveling over you. “Would you hate me if we took a rain check on the date day?”
“I could never hate you.” You frown at him. “Whatever you need. Just tell me and I’ll make it happen.”
“Come take a nap with me?” he whispers, eyebrows furrowing slightly. “All I want is to hold you and forget today exists.”
You give him a soft smile. “Of course.”
You’re not sure what it is exactly that has him so upset, but he said he didn’t want to talk about it. He guides you upstairs, fingers intertwined, and closes his bedroom door behind you once you’re both in.
Rummaging through his drawers, he grabs a shirt and hands it to you. You take it without question before going to your bag to get a pair of shorts. Without a second thought, you take your own shirt off and drop it on his floor, glancing over your shoulder at him to see him changing into a pair of sweatpants. You secure his shirt on before unbuttoning your jeans, pushing them down your legs until you can kick them off.
His arms snake around your waist, pressing his chest to your back. He kisses your cheek. “This was supposed to be a good night. I’m sorry, Sunshine, I’ll figure it out soon, okay?”
“Hey,” you murmur, turning to him. “You don’t have to apologize to me. We have all the time in the world for dates.”
“Thank you. I’m fucking exhausted.” Chenle moves toward his bed, and you follow without hesitation. When you’re both settled beneath the comforter, you curl into him like you can’t get close enough.
You’re not sure who falls asleep first, but you wake up before him. The dim lamp in the corner is now the only lighting, the sun no longer illuminating the walls in orange. A door opening and closing downstairs followed by Mark and Jisung laughing together is what stirs you.
Reluctantly pulling yourself away from Chenle, you grab your shorts from the edge of the bed and slide them on before heading toward Chenle’s friends. You rub your eyes to help you adjust to the brightness of the kitchen, and Jisung and Mark stop their conversation as they notice you.
“Hey,” Jisung says, fingers tapping on the counter.
“Don’t let me interrupt.” You chuckle, your voice still heavy with sleep. “I just wanted to ask you guys something if that’s okay.”
Mark nods. “Yeah, of course.”
“Why wasn’t he at practice today? He said something about not being able to play?”
The two boys share a look, and for some reason, that makes you feel as if you already know the answer.
“It’s because of me, isn’t it?”
“Not you,” Jisung replies. “But…”
“But what?” You cross your arms over your chest. “Come on, if there’s something I can do, I want to help.”
“Woojin reported Chenle for kicking his ass. And Coach asked him why he’d do something like that, but he wouldn’t say anything. He didn’t want to air your business or whatever, and he’s pretty much banned the rest of us from defending him. Honestly, he didn’t even want us to tell you. But we’re gonna lose without him, and this is the last championship before graduation.” Jisung pauses, pressing his lips together. “Not that we blame you, because what happened wasn’t your fault at all, but it’s just…”
“No, I get it,” you tell him. “Don’t tell him I know. I’ll fix it.”
“That’s not exactly what I meant by that, either.”
“I’m not letting myself be an inconvenience to him, Jisung.” You chew on the inside of your cheek, contemplating your next move. “Where is the coach at after mine and Chenle’s lab?”
Jisung and Mark explain to you where to find him, and then you make a mental note of it before you thank them and go back upstairs to Chenle. He’s fast asleep when you make it back, and you already know after all of the things he’s done for you, telling the truth is the least you can do for him.
Like nothing happened, you climb back into bed and resume your place against his chest.
After your lab, you make an excuse as to why you won’t be at lunch that day. You kiss Chenle’s cheek quickly, and then you’re off in the opposite direction to find his coach. Luckily for you, Jisung’s directions were foolproof, and you made your way to the office easily.
You told the truth—everything about your past with Woojin, how he’d been harassing both you and Chenle, and how he was attempting to break into your house when Chenle came to help you. It was hard to get through the story, but you knew he deserved to play in the championships. There wasn’t anything that could convince you otherwise.
You told the coach to verify the story with any of the rest of the team, and they’d corroborate it. Once you left, a weight felt like it’d been lifted from your shoulders, but you could only hope it was enough to get him his spot back.
Soon enough, you're back in Chenle’s room, sitting at his desk doing your part of the assignment from the lab. Practice starts an hour after lunch, which means you weren’t expecting him for a while yet, but when the front door opens downstairs, you’re sure it’s him.
“(Y/N)?” Chenle calls up to you.
“Homework,” you respond, nervous for his reaction.
You stand up as you hear him approaching. He opens the door, and within seconds, he’s right in front of you, tangling his fingers in your hair and smashing his lips to yours. Your surprised gasp gives him the opportunity to slide his tongue in your mouth, his other hand finding the small of your back to keep you pressed firmly to him.
He rests his forehead on yours, panting. “As much as I should kill Mark and Jisung for opening their big fucking mouths, I can’t believe you did that.”
“Are you mad at me?” you ask. “I didn’t want you to get in trouble and lose out on your games because of me, and when I—”
“No, baby, I’m not mad at you. I’m just so fucking in love with you.”
“I love you so much,” you tell him. “Are you playing next week?”
He nods, grinning. “Yeah, but I told Coach I’d come back next practice. And I also told Mark and Jisung not to come home tonight.”
You don’t respond, instead kissing him once again. He moves softer this time, his hands moving down to grip your ass. Mind whirling, you sigh into his mouth.
“I like this better than the idea of finishing homework.” You chuckle, gripping his shoulders.
“I want you so bad,” he continues, kissing up your neck. “I can’t believe you did that for me.”
Your body heats at his words, images of the ways he’s made you feel before flash across your mind. “I’d do anything for you.”
His lips are on yours again, walking you backward until the back of your knees hit the edge of his bed. You tug on his hair, and the groan he lets out sends shivers down your spine. This is what you’ve been waiting for—and when he pulls away to ask you if it’s okay, you take your shirt off in response. Both of you pause for a moment, him to look you over and you to gain the courage to keep your confidence up.
Turning the two of you around, you gently push him until he sits on the mattress, and then you climb onto his lap. He immediately grips your hips, fingers digging in hard.
His touch ghosts along your skin, making a shuddering breath escape you as every brief second of contact has you on fire.
“I love you,” he says. “Absolutely fucking everything about you.”
“Lucky me,” you murmur, reaching down for the hem of his shirt. He helps you take it off of him, pulling you closer. You gasp at the feeling of his hardening length against your core, and you start to grind down on him.
His eyes darken as he leans forward until his lips brush yours. “No. I’m the lucky one.”
You lift yourself up to push your shorts down, trying your best not to be too awkward with getting them off your legs in your current position. Chenle uses it to his advantage, kissing along your chest and nipping until marks form on your collarbone.
You pull at his pants, the way you need him so desperately making him chuckle as he moves to assist you. After he kicks them off, you continue moving your hips, his bulge rubbing right on your clit through your thin panties.
“Are you sure?” he asks, palms sliding down to your ass so he can squeeze it. “We can wait, Sunshine.”
“If I wait any longer, I might implode,” you tell him breathlessly. “I need you.”
He watches you closely as he reaches the clasp of your bra. You give him an encouraging nod, and he quickly removes it from you. He guides you on top of him, but he wets his lips before putting his hand on your back and lowering his mouth to your nipple. You groan, feeling the knot forming in your stomach at the stimulation on your clit. Whining, you move faster to reach your high, your grip on his shoulders tightening as you get closer.
His gaze meets yours briefly, and then he kisses you hard. Your pleasure becomes so overwhelming that you can’t focus on kissing him, instead a moan escapes you, and he swallows it. He holds you tightly as you practically spasm on top of him, euphoria spreading through every inch of your body.
“I can already feel how wet you are,” he mutters, inhaling sharply. “Let me make you mine, baby. Let me have you.”
“I’m yours. You’ve had me since day one.” You cup his cheeks and kiss him, heart racing.
You’ve never wanted someone as badly as you want him, but it’s only at this point that nerves start to sweep you up in their whirlwind. Like he can read your mind, he pauses, blinking up at you.
“Just relax,” he says. “Whatever you need, tell me.”
“You.” Sitting up again, you try to push your panties down. He takes the opportunity to lift up as well to take his boxers off.
“Do I need a condom?” Chenle asks, cursing under his breath when you wrap your fingers around his length.
You shake your head. “I’m on birth control.”
He gulps, lining himself up with your entrance. You sigh at the feeling, preparing yourself to sink down on him. As he slides inside, you throw your head back. The moment the two of you really connect, you realize you must’ve never been in love with someone before. There’s something about the way your heart beats for him that increases your pleasure. You’ve never felt this good before.
“Good fucking God,” he groans, grip tightening on you.
Once he’s fully in, you pause to look at him, finding his lips parted and his eyebrows furrowed. He kisses you gently and wraps his arm around you. You don’t waste anymore time and opt to set a steady pace, unafraid to let your sounds escape as his length drags slowly against your walls.
“That’s it.” His voice is strained, like he’s holding something back. He works his hips up gently every time you sink down. “You’re so fucking tight, Sunshine. You feel so good.”
You whimper at his words. The only thing you want is to pleasure him—so you pick up your speed, rolling your hips as you sink back down. When he squeezes your ass, your body jolts.
“How you feeling, baby?” he asks, massaging your butt as you work on top of him.
“Good.” Actually, like you’re on a cloud of pleasure, and every time you take him deep, you think how you want him to be inside you forever. “So good.”
He secures his grasp on you before flipping you over onto your back. You immediately wrap your legs around his waist and lock your ankles together. He moves faster, thrusting at a steady but mind blowing pace. Your eyes roll, and you can barely think coherently with his cock throbbing inside you. His chest presses against yours, the closeness making your body so much hotter.
Sweat forms on your skin, and you tangle your fingers in his hair to lead him down to kiss you. You moan into his mouth when his tip kisses your spot. Every vein in your body is on fire, every thrust brings you closer to Chenle. Sounds of your arousal sound with each movement, joined in harmony with both yours and Chenle’s moans.
He snakes his hand between the two of you, his finger connecting with your sensitive clit. Your pleasured cry is louder than you anticipated, but it pulls a similar sound from Chenle.
“You gonna cum for me?” he mumbles against your mouth. “C’mon, Sunshine, squeeze my cock.”
Your back arches into him, nails digging into his shoulders as your walls clamp down on him like a vice. Euphoria bursts throughout you, and you swear your vision blacks out for a second as Chenle’s thrusts pick up in pace. He fucks you through your orgasm until he lets out a string of curse words.
“Fuck, baby, where do you want it?” he asks, voice tinged with desperation. “I’m so close.”
“Inside. Cum in me.” You lift your hips to match his thrusts, dazed from your own orgasm. All you want is to feel him fill you up.
He drops his head on your shoulder, thrusting one last time before his warm cum coats your walls. Both of you lay there, unmoving. He kisses the base of your neck, panting as he tries to regain his breath.
You pull him up to kiss him, lips working gently on his. He hums against your mouth, nails scratching up and down your thigh.
“Was that worth missing practice?” You grin up at him.
“I’d miss a whole lot more than practice for this.” He smiles, shaking his head as he slowly pulls out of you. “Take a bath with me?”
“Only if you carry me there.” You push his shoulder. “My legs are a little…”
“Just the way they should be.” Chenle winks at you before he gets up to head into the bathroom to start the water. 
Once it’s filled, he scoops you up in his arms and places you in the tub, somehow the perfect temperature, and climbs in behind you, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you flush to him.
As you relax with him, allowing him to wash your body ever-so-delicately, you realize this is how it always should’ve been. You feel free, like you’ve been unshackled from your past just by loving Chenle and being loved by him.
It’s as if you’ve made it to your destination—like the journey matters just as much as the end. You look at him over your shoulder, and he kisses you so softly, you let out a sigh of content.
The teams were tied—Chenle was visibly irritated by the way the scoreboard had yet to change with minimal time left on the countdown. This has been the closest game all season—most of the others had been clean sweeps—yet here he is, during the last one of his college career, and he’s close to losing for the first time.
You and Jiyoon sit with Jisung’s parents and Chenle’s parents, leaning forward in deep concentration. Playing with the thread bracelet on your wrist, you watch in earnest as you see the time ticking down. Chenle blocks the ball from going into the net, effectively taking it and running across the court til he gets to the middle. The other team basically bombards him, but as he lines up to take his shot, you grab Jiyoon’s arm and squeeze it. The countdown hits three seconds when he throws it, and it’s like the ball moves in slow motion.
Your jaw hangs open, and right as the clock hits zero, the ball sinks into the net, putting Chenle’s team one point over the other. You and Jiyoon both launch up, shouting and cheering. He turns to you, as if to make sure you saw that, and when he finds you grinning at him, he moves toward you like it’s a reflex.
You leave your spot in the bleachers and meet him in the middle. He picks you up as you wrap your arms around him, and you laugh as you hold on tightly. His smile is wide as he sets you back on your feet, kissing you hard. You giggle against his mouth, and an overwhelming sense of pride settles in your chest.
“You did so well,” you praise him and press your lips to his cheek.
“It’s all ‘cause I had my good luck charm.” He squeezes you tightly. “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” you reply.
The words had never left your mouth so easily, nor have you ever meant them as much as you do now. You’ve only just hatched into the person you’re supposed to be, and with Chenle by your side, you know it’s only going to get better from here.
But you love here, too, because in the distance, finally you see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Finally, you see your sea.
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Hello:))) been reading ur newt hcs and absolutely adored them YOU WRITE HIM SO SWEET. But i was wondering if you would do newt cuddling hcs with a f!reader please? (I haven’t requested for you before so if this isn't the type of thing you do just delete this lol)
thanks<3
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hello anon!! i'm happy you like those!! i think that newt is the type of person that treats their s/o gentle !! i hope you like this:))))
Newt who can't keep his hands to himself when you're both cuddling. Newt who would pull you into his chest with your back against him so he can kiss your neck. Newt who would put his arm around your waist just to touch you. Newt who would be crazy and rambles whenever he sees you wear his shirts to cuddle or sleep (and when you ask him why, he says "you look hot- i mean beautiful, wait i didn't mean it like your not hot, cause you are hot, i mean- your hot- wait that's not the point- but you look bloody amazing with my shirt"). Newt who can't sleep without you in his arms. Newt who would be very clingy and glued to you when both of you are alone (he's starved for your attention and affection). Newt who doesn't have a 'favourite cuddle position' but he loves it so much when you rest your head on his chest and just lay there. Newt who runs his fingers through your hair and leave a bunch of kisses all over your face whenever he gets the chance. Newt who sometimes wander his hands underneath your shirt (with consent of course) and he just trace circles all over your skin. Newt who sometimes would just lay in your arms tiredly because he’s exhaused from doing all work, helping around the glade, and having many meetings with Alby and the runners(he's a busy man). Newt who would smell a little more earthy when you guys are cuddling before shower. Newt who prefers to cuddle after shower because he thinks you'll like him more if he smells 'sweet like a candy' when you're both cuddling (he used your soap and shampoo because he said it made him "smell like sweets and vanilla" lol ). Newt who would sleep with you with hardly any space between each other. Newt who loves it when you bury your face in his neck and when you play with his hair. Newt who will always pull you back onto the bed and back into his arms if you try to leave or stop cuddling. ("Newt we have to get up! Alby will be mad at us-" "2 more minutes, please love? i'm sure Alby will be fine without me" "Newt, you said that 20 minutes ago."). Newt who doesn't mind being a big spoon or the little spoon when you're both cuddling. Newt who likes it when his arms are securely around your waist & his face in your hair when he's being the big spoon. Newt's arms will be the place you wake up every morning. Newt who would ask if he can play with your hair every time you're both cuddling (he wants to make sure you're giving him consent even tho you've reassured him that he doesn't need to ask that). Newt who would randomly compliment you when your almost asleep ("your so beautiful. like really bloody beautiful, love"). Newt who would sometimes talk in his sleeps because he gets nightmares when he's cuddling you ("please stay, please. don't go. stay with me." "i'm not going anywhere love"). Newt who would easily get sleepy when you run your hands through his hair. Newt who would fall asleep on top of you, then wakes up only to ask if you're okay, if he made you uncomfortable, and why didn’t you wake him up in his raspy sleepy voice. Newt who would have a staring contest with you and then make stupid faces so you laugh and he wins the contest (later on he tease you about it). Newt who would stay up with you and just have deep conversations as you both cuddle when you can't sleep ("why do people has to lose the person they love first, to realize they're bloody value and worth? doesn't make sense, what do you think?").
I GOT SO CARRIED AWAY MAKING THIS, IT TURNED OUT SO LONGGGG. I'M SORRY IF THIS IS TOO LONG FOR YOU
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hooniblr · 1 month
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𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒 (𝐘𝐄𝐓) 𝐈𝐈𝐈
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PAIRING ▸ nishimura riki x female feader
WORD COUNT ▸ 4.4k
GENRE ▸ high school au, brother’s best friend au, fluff, angst
SYNOPSIS ▸ After spending the better part of your adolescent life crushing on your brother’s best friend, you finally decide to call it quits on your unrequited feelings when you come to the conclusion that’s all they will ever be—unrequited. The only problem is that getting rid of these feelings that have been lurking in your heart is much more difficult than you anticipated. Especially because the object of your affections keeps making it hard for you to move on.
Or the one where everyone ends up with emotional turmoil.
WARNINGS ▸ reader as sunoo’s twin sister, riki as sunoo’s bestie, feat. some of the newjeans members, misunderstandings, pining, slow burn, hurt feelings, mentions of claustrophobia, reader has a panic attack, hoonie is kind of mean in this one (sorry lol)
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NOTE — if your user has a line through it that means you could not be tagged! please change your settings so i don’t remove you from the taglist! mdni banner made by @/benkeibear
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Nishimura Riki was many things, but an unhelpful jerk was not one of them. Those close to him knew that he could never ignore a person in need. Every time he was asked for help, he would do just about anything in his power to do just that. It was near impossible for him to say no, and the situation he suddenly found himself in was no exception.
“Please?”
Song Yura’s clasped hands were resting under her chin prettily, her pleading eyes shining brilliantly like she was holding back tears. Riki’s expression softened because like most guys in his school, he couldn’t bear to say no to one of the prettiest girls he had ever seen. And while he didn’t immediately agree to her request, it didn’t mean that he wasn’t being swayed.
Okay, so the favor she needed was borderline unreasonable and downright toxic, but a large part of Riki didn’t care because it directly involved messing with Lee Heeseung.
“Can’t you just tell that idiot how you feel?” Riki’s tone was slightly rough. “Using me to make him jealous isn’t going to make him want you.”
Yura scowled at him. “How do you know? Jealousy is a powerful emotion.”
Riki’s jaw ticked. He knew that her stupid plan had a 95% chance of failing because anyone with eyes could tell that Heeseung was down bad for you. And as much as it killed him to witness it, he was pretty sure the feeling was mutual.
“Whatever you say.” Riki scoffed. “I still think this is a terrible idea.”
His friend only blinked at him before a victorious smirk slowly spread on her lips. She didn’t hear a no. “But you’ll help me, right?”
Riki’s tongue poked the corner of his lips, narrowed eyes glaring at the shorter girl with resignation. Maybe he would come to regret his decision, but if he could help his friend while getting that jerk away from you, then so be it.
“Yeah. I will.”
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ⋆✦⋆ ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
Sunghoon was usually not one to pay attention to rumors, but even he couldn’t avoid hearing that Nishimura Riki and Song Yura were talking. It’s not a rumor that particularly interested him since he didn’t really care about his cousin’s love life. However, it did break his heart for you. In spite of what you wanted him to believe, he knew you never really got over your crush on Riki.
That’s why he disregards reason and goes out to look for you when he heard some of his classmates talking about the new hot couple of the school. Maybe it was foolish of him to do so because he was the one to walk away from you in the first place, yet he couldn’t care about any of that. He just needed to be there should you be in need of comfort.
Except when he made it outside and saw you just a few feet away from the school’s entrance, he belatedly realized that you had already found a source of comfort in the form of Lee Heeseung.
The sight made Sunghoon feel sick. You seemed oblivious to the way the taller boy was staring at you with a stupid look on his face. It made his stomach turn with bitter jealousy. From the looks of it, he could tell that your involvement with Heeseung went beyond a simple friendship. It killed him to see just how brightly you smiled at Lee Heeseung. You claimed to not have any feelings for him, but maybe you were just in denial.
And now, Sunghoon could only watch with a crestfallen face as Heeseung handed you a cute little box. Your eyes lit up brightly to the point that it looked like they were nearly sparkling. It killed him to see how prettily you smiled when you opened the box and pulled out a star necklace.
Heeseung smiled softly. “Do you like it?”
“It’s so pretty.” You couldn’t keep the excitement out of your voice.
You gently place the necklace back in its box before throwing your arms around your friend. When he said he’d get you a prize for finally beating him in a match, you thought he was just going to treat you to a meal or something. “Thanks, Hee.”
Sunghoon refused to watch any further, turning on his heel and walking away from the sight that made him feel like someone punched him in the gut. Right then he decided that he was going to get to the bottom of your relationship with Lee Heeseung even if it was the last thing he did.
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You were going to kill Minji.
When you told her she could invite people to join you for karaoke, you didn’t think she would be stupid enough to invite Jungwon. It’s not like you had anything against him, but anywhere he went, your brother and Riki followed. This wouldn’t have been such a big problem had you not been avoiding Riki and if you hadn’t invited Heeseung to come along with you.
And to make matters worse, Heeseung brought along his friends which included resident puppy boy, Jake Sim. Much like Jungwon, you had nothing against Jake, but he happened to bring along your insufferable ex and his lovely cousin who he was apparently very close to.
“Should we get something to eat first?” Danielle wondered, trying to ease the obvious tension and discomfort that surrounded the group.
“There’s a chicken restaurant by the karaoke place.” Sunoo said cheerfully. “Let’s go there.”
A chorus of agreements paired with Jay and Jake’s enthusiastic cheers broke some of the lingering animosity, but not completely. As everyone walked in the direction of the restaurant, you quickly pulled Heeseung aside. Your eyes were wide with anger, and it wasn’t just because of the fact that Sunghoon kept staring at you.
“What the fuck, Heeseung?” You hissed, slapping your friend’s arm. “Why would you let Jake bring him?”
“Why did you let Minji bring Nishimura?” Heeseung countered, feeling like he was about to pop a vein.
“I didn’t know she invited them! I don’t want to see him with Yura any more than you do.”
It wasn’t like they were making out in front of you or anything, but they were giggling and whispering to each other like they were in their own little world. Also, Riki had casually slung one of his long arms across Yura’s shoulders, keeping her close to him as they walked. Just seeing them all hugged up was enough for you to consider ending your night early.
“I’m sorry.” Heeseung sighed, knowing that now you were not only forced to see your crush with someone else, but also forced to tolerate your idiot of an ex. “You think they’ll notice if we leave?”
Hearing you laugh was a relief. Maybe the night could be salvaged after all.
“I told you your plan wouldn’t work.” Riki whispered through gritted teeth. “Your little boyfriend could care less that you’re here.”
Yura pouted, chancing a glance back to where she could hear the sound of a cute laugh. It was true. Heeseung was so engrossed with watching you giggle that he didn’t seem to notice how close her and Riki had gotten. Not that she could blame him. You were especially pretty when you laughed.
With a huff, Yura looked straight ahead. “Whatever. The night isn’t over yet.”
Riki looked back. His eyes landed on a sullen Sunghoon who hadn’t taken his eyes off of you since he and Yura arrived. It’s not like Riki felt bad for him or anything. He saw firsthand how devastating your breakup with him had been. However, in that moment Riki almost felt like he understood exactly how Sunghoon was feeling.
Seeing you laugh happily with Lee Heeseung made Riki physically sick. Especially after you sent him a text asking him to just let it go this once since you technically couldn’t avoid Heeseung at this point. It made him more upset than he thought was possible.
Dinner went by in a forgettable blur which you were grateful for. So far, you and Heeseung had done a decent job at hiding how devastating it was to see Yura and Riki together. It wasn’t until the group was going into the karaoke place that your night started to sour.
“Y/N.” Sunghoon’s voice was soft as he gently pulled on the sleeve of your jacket. “Can we talk?”
Unfortunately, Heeseung was the first one inside since he was eager to out-sing everyone which meant you would have to deal with Sunghoon alone. You let the group go ahead, giving Danielle and Minji a small nod so they wouldn’t feel bad about leaving you alone.
A frown lined your lips as you faced Sunghoon. “What do you want?”
Your voice was cold and distant, and Sunghoon felt himself deflate. “I want us to go back to the way we used to be. Before… everything, we used to be friends. Now, you can barely even look at me, and I hate it.”
His unreasonable request made you scoff. You’re not sure why he thought you two could ever be friends or anything close to that again. There was a building tightness in your throat as you tried not to unleash all of your stifled emotions.
“That’s not going to happen. I got over what happened between us, but that doesn’t mean I want you around.”
“Why?” Sunghoon demanded. “Because of Heeseung?”
He was overstepping, but you somehow managed to keep your emotions in check long enough to answer him. “So what if it is?”
“Does he know how you feel about Riki?” It was a low blow, but Sunghoon was too upset to take his words back.
Your icy gaze got colder, and it was taking everything in you not to hit Sunghoon like you wanted. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Now it was Sunghoon who scoffed. “Yeah, right. You’ve always liked him. Even when we were together, you had feelings for him. Don’t think I didn’t notice.”
You swallowed thickly. While his words were not untrue, Sunghoon didn’t realize he was the only guy who had ever moved your heart to the point where you started to forget about Riki. Not that it mattered anymore.
“What do you care who I do or don’t like? Just mind your own business.”
“I may not be friends with Heeseung anymore, but he doesn’t deserve only half of your heart.” Sunghoon’s voice trembled, and he knew that once everything was said and done he was going to regret his harsh words. But right now he could only vent his sadness and anger on you even though you didn’t deserve it. “It’s not right for you to make him your back burner just because Riki doesn’t like you.”
The second he spoke those harsh words, he regretted it. Your face crumbled, steely gaze twisting into one of hurt and shock. The sight alone made Sunghoon feel like someone struck him in the chest. “Y/N, I—”
“You don’t know anything.” You told him through gritted teeth, barely holding back angry tears. “Not that it’s any of your business, but Heeseung and I aren’t like that.”
Sunghoon grew indignant again. “Oh yeah? Then why did he give you that necklace you’re wearing?”
You were at a breaking point, but you weren’t willing to let him of all people see you at your worst. So you didn’t answer, but your silence didn’t deter him.
“That’s what I thought.” Sunghoon frowned, not liking the turn the conversation took. “You have to be honest with him so he doesn’t get hurt—”
“Why do you care so much about us, anyway?” You snapped, sick of him acting like he knew what was going on. “Stop acting like you’re doing this because of Heeseung when all you care about is hurting me.”
Us? The word had Sunghoon clenching his jaw. Had he been right all along? Did you and Heeseung have something more than just a simple friendship? “I don’t want to hurt you. Believe it or not, that’s something I never wanted to do.”
You let out a breath that sounded like a mixture of a scoff and a laugh, knowing you had to get ahold of yourself before going inside. But the hurtful emotions wouldn’t stop growing. They only got worse with each passing moment. “That’s funny because that’s all you do, Sunghoon.”
“Y/N.”
You looked back to see Riki glaring at Sunghoon. At that moment you felt your heart drop into your stomach. How long had he been listening? Riki’s angry stare didn’t falter even as he walked over to where you were. He grabbed your wrist and pulled you away from your ex.
“Come on.” Riki finally took his glaring eyes off of Sunghoon, only to look at you softly. “The others are waiting.”
Normally, you would avoid being dragged anywhere by your crush, but Riki’s appearance came like a blessing to you. The last thing you wanted was to spend another minute with the boy who only insisted on adding to your misery. So you followed him, hoping with all your might that he didn’t know about your feelings for him.
Sunghoon watched with a raised eyebrow as Riki guided you away from him. Interesting. He had doubted that the thing with his cousin and Riki was real, and by the looks of it, he was right. The gag of it all was that your little unrequited crush didn’t seem to be so unrequited after all.
“Did you hear everything?” You wondered quietly as Riki guided you to the room everyone was in.
He looked over at you, frowning when he saw how embarrassed you looked. In all honesty, he’d only heard the last part where you said all Sunghoon did was hurt you. But since it seemed like you were completely mortified, he decided to lie a little. “No. I just know you didn’t want to be out there with him so I came and got you.”
You visibly relaxed. “Thanks, Riki.”
It was easier than expected to pretend like you hadn’t just been through the emotional ringer. The rest of the night proceeded without any further incident, and you thought it would end smoothly with you putting it behind you. As always, you weren’t so fortunate.
You went outside to see Heeseung staring at the street, or rather, the two people by it. Riki and Yura were standing closely, talking and laughing like they had been doing all night. His gaze became colder the longer he looked at them. If jealousy could be personified, you imagined that it would look something like Heeseung did at the moment.
“Don’t be a masochist.” You tried to keep your tone light, but it sounded resigned and miserable. “Giving them the evil eye won’t change anything.”
Heeseung let out a sigh as he followed you into the street, doing his best to keep his eyes off of his crush and the guy he hated more than anyone.
“Are you guys leaving?”
Yura’s friendly question was tempting to ignore, but you couldn’t. After all, she couldn’t be blamed for Riki’s lack of attraction toward you.
“Yeah.” You gave her what you hoped looked like a genuine smile. “See you guys later.”
With that, you and Heeseung left the pair behind, not realizing that you dropped the necklace your friend had given you.
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ⋆✦⋆ ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
Just because you were avoiding Riki, it didn’t mean you were extending that same treatment to his family. Over the years, you had grown close to his little sister. You were really fond of her, and since her birthday was coming up, you decided to go to the mall to pick out her present. It was supposed to be a quick thing, but that all changed when you ran into Heeseung.
The unexpected run in wasn’t unpleasant since he was your friend after all, but there was something off about his demeanor. His expression wasn’t as cheerful, and you could see that there was this muted anger in his expression that wouldn’t go away. You decided not to comment on it since he clearly didn’t want to walk about what was bothering him.
Everything took a turn for the worse when Heeseung asked you to follow him. There was a moment where you thought following your perturbed friend would only lead to trouble, but it was fleeting. He was probably ready to leave and so were you since she hadn’t found the shoes Riki’s sister mentioned that she wanted. Even as you two ended up where the elevators were, you didn’t think anything was out of the ordinary.
Until he guided you toward the shutting elevator, that is.
Heeseung surprised you by sticking his hand out to prevent it from closing. You could only stare with wide eyes, unable to understand why he felt the need to act so irrationally when there were plenty of other elevators you could take. Your shocked confusion didn’t last long. The doors opened fully to reveal none other than Riki and Song Yura.
They seemed as surprised as you felt.
The entire situation would’ve been comedic had it not been for the animosity that was quickly closing in. You spent half a second contemplating on running in the opposite direction until something caught your attention. Your gaze settled on the cute little shopping bag in Riki’s grasp. It was a bag from his sister’s favorite clothing store. Your heart jerked painfully when you realized what was going on.
Ever since you got close to Riki, he had enlisted your help to buy his sisters (his younger one in particular) the perfect gifts. It was practically a tradition at this point. Seeing that he had asked for Yura’s help instead of yours felt like the equivalent of someone punching you in the chest.
You didn’t get any time to focus on your hurt feelings because from the looks that were exchanged between the two boys, you knew that you had just been dropped in the middle of a crossfire.
Heeseung grabbed you and pulled you inside the elevator without any hesitation. You gave him an incredulous glare. It was obvious that he had some poorly-crafted plan to wedge himself between Riki and Yura, but you didn’t understand why he felt the need to involve you. At this point, all you wanted to do was run back home and have a good cry.
“Hey!” Riki’s death stare was piercing he looked at Heeseung. “What the hell do you think you're doing?”
“What about you?” Heeseung countered. “What are you doing?”
During this brief exchange, you made eye contact with Yura. Her eyes drifted down to where Heeseung was still holding onto your wrist. The disillusion on her face probably resembled the look on your own face. Although, you were too busy trying to process the crazy turn of events to make sense of Yura’s disappointed expression.
“Hee.” You whispered the plea while attempting to free yourself from his hold. “Let’s get off.”
Using all your strength, you managed to get to the edge of the elevator (right between the doors), but Heeseung’s iron-like grip prevented you from leaving. Riki pressed one of the buttons to keep the door from closing without taking his glaring eyes off of Heeseung. By now, your heartbeat seemed to be ringing in your ears as the two boys kept exchanging words you couldn’t make out. You were vaguely aware that they kept pushing the buttons sporadically, but only came back to reality when the door jammed and nearly crushed you.
With a startled yelp, you were pulled back into the elevator by Heeseung—who was now questioning Yura on what she was doing shopping with Riki. The words spoken still sounded muffled and indistinguishable.
You could feel your heartbeat skip a beat when the elevator came to a sluggish stop. Immediately, you became aware of the fact that you were now trapped. No. No no no no no, no. Not here. Not now. Trying to stop yourself from panicking was futile. Your hands began to clam up and you could feel your chest tighten with anxiety. The tremors always started out faint, but it never took long for them to worsen. The shortness of breath always followed, and you only hoped the others wouldn’t notice.
Shutting your eyes never helped, but you did it every time. The back of your eyelids were painted with horrible thoughts of being trapped in a confined space. You had been working through your phobia slowly, and you naively thought that you had finally made some real progress. None of that seemed to be true now that you could feel yourself trembling like a leaf.
“Y/N! Kim Y/N!”
Your eyes flew open. At some point, you had lost the feeling in your legs and fallen to the floor. Riki was crouched down in front of you, eyes full of panic and worry. His hands gently cradled your face as he delicately wiped the tears you didn’t realize were falling from your eyes. “Y/N, look at me. It’s okay. Breathe. Just breathe.”
Sunoo had told Riki all about his twin’s claustrophobia. He was vague when he said it was because of something traumatic that had happened to you as a child, but he mentioned that you would get horrible panic attacks because of it. That’s why you didn’t like taking taxis or even buses. Riki couldn’t stand seeing the horrified look on your face. The sheer terror in your eyes killed him.
“Wh-What’s wrong with her?” Yura asked, feeling her own heart start to race.
“She’s having a panic attack.” Heeseung said, the raw emotion in his voice peeking through. He didn’t try to hide the horror on his face. This was all his fault.
“R-Riki.” You wheezed out. “I-I can’t– I can’t bre—”
You couldn’t even finish your sentence, the tightness in your chest hindering you from going on. Everything seemed to be closing in, and you didn’t know what to do. All you wanted was your brother.
“You can do it.” Riki reassured you. “It’s going to be okay. Count with me.”
And you did. Slowly and feebly, but you did it. Your breathing was nearly back to normal when the doors of the elevator were pulled open. The four of you looked up at the point of escape, wanting nothing more than to get out. With all your rational thoughts pushed to the side, you recoiled from Riki’s touch.
“Y/N—!”
You ignored Riki’s heartbroken voice and quickly scrambled out of the elevator, feeling more mortified than ever.
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ⋆✦⋆ ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
Riki stood outside of your house, awkwardly shifting on his feet. In all the years he had been friends with you and Sunoo, he never hesitated to knock on your door (even when he came by unannounced). But this was time different. After the way you ran off at the mall, he wasn’t so sure that you wanted to see him.
Even so, he needed to know that you were okay.
Just as he walked up your driveway, the front door opened. Riki’s eyes narrowed instinctively when he saw a familiar face come through the door. “What are you doing here?”
Heeseung blinked once, clearly irritated. “I came to make sure Y/N is okay.”
Riki clenched his jaw. He had no right to be as angry as he was since seeing the boy you liked would no doubt make you feel better, but he couldn’t stand Lee Heeseung assuming a role that wasn’t meant for him.
“That’s funny considering you’re the reason she wasn’t fine.” Riki spat, not caring that he sounded harsh.
Heeseung was very conscious that he was (partially) at fault, but he didn’t need to hear that from Nishimura Riki of all people. “You’re one to talk. Aren’t you too busy with Song Yura to care about what’s going on with Y/N?”
It’s weird that he brought up Yura, and it was even more strange that he was bringing up the fact that you two haven’t been as close lately. Now he knows for sure Heeseung was the reason you seemed to want nothing to do with him anymore. But he still couldn’t figure out how Yura played a part in all this. Had her crazy plan actually worked?
“What happens between Yura and I has nothing to do with Y/N.” Riki’s steely gaze slowly morphed into an amused one. “And it has nothing to do with you either.”
Based on the way Heeseung’s face scrunched up in anger, Riki could tell there was definitely something there. It made his stomach turn with disgust because how could he be stringing you along while also feeling something for Yura?
“You can keep following Yura like a lost puppy, but don’t bring Y/N into it. I won’t let you mess with her feelings."
Heeseung raised his eyebrow with a loud scoff. “I’m not the one who’s messing with her feelings.”
His brazen attitude made Riki explode just a tiny bit. “Don’t act fucking stupid. I can tell you like Yura, so why the hell do you keep hanging around Y/N and acting like you like her?”
“The only one who’s acting that way is you.”
Heeseung words were biting, and for the first time in a long time, Riki was at a loss for words. The statement itself was so absurd that he nearly choked on his own spit after hearing that moron say those words. Riki wanted to tell him that the only thing he was acting like was a good friend. For some reason the words couldn’t come out.
“I know where I stand with my feelings.” Heeseung said in a way that sounded like he was accusing his former friend of something. “Do you?”
Riki didn’t say anything even when Heeseung walked away from him. Those asinine words were bouncing back and forth in his mind until he really digested them and the implications they came with. His heart was pounding as he stared at the Kim household. Could that idiot be right? Was it possible that these protective feelings stemmed from something more intense that he wasn’t ready to acknowledge?
No. It was impossible. There was no way he would ever betray his best friend by liking his sister.
Although, the longer he thought about it, the bigger the discomfort in his chest grew.
365 notes · View notes
meyousing · 4 months
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𝐋𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐀 𝐒𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐝
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𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: you’re used to light being distant, so when he decides to lay the affection on heavy and proposes a new idea to you at the same time, you’re helplessly intrigued. 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: nsfw, yandere light yagami x reader, idk if this matters to say right off the bat but you’re wearing a skirt :] also mentions of death like always lol but none fr! alsoalso this idea has probably been done to death by now but to be fair I started this A YEAR AGO!! pls enjoy despite that lol ily <3
“What is it?” his eyes sharpened as they narrowed at you from across the room, voice laced with blatant boredom. That was what you told yourself anyway, truly hoping that it was boredom and not annoyance because the look he always gave you at times like this made you cave in on yourself, instantly regretting whatever you had done to be such a bother. All that you were doing now was laying idly on his bed, legs swinging out of habit as you were on your stomach and flipping through a magazine that he had given as a pacifier. Maybe he knew that you were actually keeping your eyes on him this entire time, rather than the sheets before you.
“What do you mean?” playing dumb never worked with Light, but you would always do it anyway. It could provide a delay of the inevitable if nothing else. 
You heard the tap of his pen as he dropped it on his desk, followed by the soft thud of his notebook closing before he stood from his chair. A regular notebook, you noticed, thankfully.
“Trying to outsmart me again?”
Right, his interpretation of your playing dumb was much less simple than what you intended to get across. Of course, he knew that you knew better, so your deception was instead seen as defiance; a flaunt of superiority. 
“Of course not,” you shut your magazine, sliding it to the side of the bed and cringing when it slid off of the bed, crumpling up in an ironically tense pile on the floor. Surely Light wasn’t too attached to it, as he merely spared it a passing glance before casting his eyes upon you once more. Then he began to approach, making you swallow a newfound lump in your throat as you scampered back to sit up on your haunches. 
“Then what is it?” he leaned over you, his hands resting at your sides with your faces inches apart. His breath was slow through his nose, soft and cold as each exhale blew onto the tip of your nose. 
How to tell him that the stupid magazine didn’t pacify you at all, that only his attention could soothe you? And how embarrassing it could get if you admitted to the exact type of attention that you needed. 
He began leaning closer as your mind raced, thinking of a different possible answer, but then it went entirely blank as he was close enough to brush his lips over yours. Tantalizingly, the gentlest nudge and he only did it once before pulling back slightly, you could have missed it had your brain continued thinking so hard. The sensation nearly made you crumble, a chill shooting down your spine as you inhaled and resisted the urge to wet your now trembling lips, focusing on maintaining your posture. He knew how to break you, you didn’t want him to see it happen this soon.
“Nothing” was all you could say without simply blabbering out every dirty thought plaguing your mind.
“You never stare at me like that for nothing,” he said pointedly, even adding a cheeky but very slight tilt of his head. Had your stare really been so obvious? You truly did try to be subtle. Either way, you found it humorous how he could go from cold with seemingly deadened emotions to a teaser within minutes. Finding it humorous helped you cope with how scary you knew he could be. 
With the lightest shove to his chest you could muster alongside a bashful turn of your head, you tried creating some space between yourselves to alleviate the fast beating of your heart.
“Really, it’s nothing. I didn’t mean to distract you from your work…” Your hand lingered on his chest after the little push, kneading the material of his shirt idly as you hoped this excuse would suffice. This mannerism alone proved the opposite of your hopes to him. 
When the full press of his lips fell upon yours in a genuine kiss this time, you knew that you had failed. Even more so when you subconsciously deepened it with a lean closer, making your grip on his shirt firmer to keep him from moving away. Though it seemed he had no intention of doing so, instead easing you down to lay your back against his mattress, crawling over you as soon as you were horizontal. 
This kiss, unlike all of his others which would be quick and half-assed–your lips barely meeting before he was already turning his head away to tend to some other matter–was compassionate. One of his hands found the side of your face and he caressed your cheekbone with his thumb, his other fingers which became entangled in your hair from the placement were massaging your scalp soothingly. The sensation lulled you and had you sinking even deeper into his bed while pulling him along with you, your fingertips meeting at the back of his neck and fiddling with the ends of his hair. While this kiss was unusual, it was not unwelcome. 
You didn’t know that there would be a catch to this sudden affection.
You could feel Light smirking against you, his entire aura darkening once he did, so much that you could feel it–and your reaction to such a peculiarity was communicated with a tensing of your shoulders. Upon sensing this, Light was quick to groan and prod his tongue against your bottom lip, which surprised you further and allowed him to invade your mouth. The intimate sound he let out and the way he just seemed so infatuated with you right now had your heart racing. 
This moment ended almost as quickly as it started though, he pulled away from you and nudged his nose against yours. You tried not to show your disappointment, but you knew that it must have been obvious when a frown graced your lips. 
“I want to try something.”
This could go in any direction. He was always so unpredictable, mood changing on a dime whether it was for better or worse. 
“What’s that?” you asked with a small voice, indicative of your anxiety about the unknown. You were already playing right into his hands.
“I want to reward you for being so obedient.”
A reward? Who is this and what has he done with your Light?!
His hand on your cheek rubbed it once more before he lifted himself off of you, steadying himself with hands on your waist as he did. You remained in your place, only watching with your eyes as he leaned over to reach into his desk and a drawer.
The drawer.
You turned your head with a gulp as you watched him retrieve his arm, now holding the dreaded notebook that you had tried to shield yourself from, trying to stay ignorant for the sake of keeping your relationship peaceful with the man you couldn’t help but love. 
“So long as your obedience remains the same, you’ll be rewarded. We’re going to test it right now.” 
He placed the book by your hand which had fallen to your side once he moved, putting his pen between your loose fingers and adjusting it until it stayed still there without tipping over. Your limbs had frozen, so it was no tough feat for him. You were shocked even further when Light’s expression altered somewhat once he actually took notice of how tense you were. Last you could remember, he couldn’t care less when your discomfort was so obvious. 
“It really is going to be rewarding for you. Don’t you trust me?”
He always had to ask you that. How much more obvious could you be about your unequivocal devotion to him, your infinite trust? You’d been by his side all this time, yet he would still ask, nearly daily, most commonly before asking you to do something that you didn’t want to do. As if anyone else would remain with him when finding out his secret, and he still doubted you.
“You know I do.” You murmured, fingers twitching around the cold pen in your grasp. 
“Then at least hear me out” he chuckled dryly, not with any sense of legitimate humour. You tried to be subtle as you swallowed the lump in your throat, having heard such an impatient laugh come from him countless times before.
“This won’t be going away any time soon,” he patted the notebook, “and I can tell that you won’t be either. I mean, as long as you keep following along with me, here.” He glimpsed at you differently then, as if his eyes were asking you to challenge that statement.
You only nodded. Light grinned.
“Good.”
His fingers moved to peel open the book, and you glanced away from it as he skimmed past so many pages that were filled from margin to margin with names. The crisp sounds of paper brushing together stopped once he found a blank one.  
Your eyes stayed on him, and you could feel some burning bile churn and slosh around in your gut as a little smirk pulled at his lips. His eyes darkened when they met yours.
His free hand, which was out of your line of sight, traced the waistband of your skirt. You flinched slightly in surprise, and Light’s smirk widened as he leaned closer to you.
“Write your name.”
Despite being unmoving already, you froze even further, stiffening like a stone and watching him desperately, trying to detect any hint of jesting in his demand. But the wickedness surrounding Light was unrelenting; he meant what he said. 
“What?” you asked quietly, needing to hear it again to really believe that he meant it.
“Start writing your name. Trust me, won’t you?” 
“I-I do–”
“I know. So do it.” Light’s tone was more firm now. 
You could only hold your breath when your eyes flitted over to your hand, your fingers readjusting the pen as you tried to point it toward the paper. The book itself felt alive, you could sense its unreal gaze–like it was taunting you, mocking and laughing at you, tempting you to write, and calling you a coward if you dared to show any hesitation because it shouldn’t be that hard. 
Having been with Light for so long now, you fully understood the notebook’s functionality. Knowing that, would it really be so crazy if you were being a coward about this? 
“Any time now, love” Light’s voice became impatient, and when you looked up at him, his kneeling posture was equivalent to being on the edge of his seat. He looked like he could implode had you made it this far and chose to back out now, he was so eager. You’d hate to disappoint him, even if his little pet name for you was clearly insincere.
Your body went cold and numb once you pushed the tip of the pen against the page, watching the smallest droplet of dark ink soak into the lines. Your hand remained stagnant following this, and you spared a short glance up at Light, noting how his eyes were stuck on the pen. You took in a breath, holding it and letting your lungs fill so you’d become a little lightheaded–a little less aware of this horrible reality–before moving further with utmost reluctance to drag the tool, lining the shape of the first letter in your name.
You could hear Light exhaling as you finally did. You couldn’t let out that breath of your own just yet. Maybe your cause of death would be suffocation, then.
Your focus was ripped away from the note in an instant once you felt a cold fingertip trace over your clit from above your panties, making your body jolt as you met eyes with Light. He wasn’t looking at you yet, only doing so once you stopped writing. 
“Go on. I’m staying true to my word.” To emphasize this, he pressed down against your clit again, his push firm but gentle–leaving you on the cusp of craving more as the sensation gave you chills, yet also sent heat through your lower half. 
So pathetically, that small second of pleasure was enough to incentivize a continuation, and you managed to finish printing that very first letter. 
“Good…”
He resumed what he had been doing, gently circling your bud and using the advantage of that added layer from your panties to optimize the friction; encouraging you. You could feel the way that you were starting to get wet, soaking the material and only making such movements smoother for Light. 
You paused as the feeling grew slightly more intense, coping, and your pause made Light do the same. You two were playing a little game, it seemed, and you obviously didn’t want it to stop–you had to keep going. You had wanted him minutes before this, after all, and you were finally getting what you craved.
Letter two manifested; your grip on the writing utensil weakened as he pulled your panties aside to touch your skin directly. 
You shuddered from the sudden cool air that brushed along your exposed skin, and he dragged some of your slick up from your pussy, using it to make rubbing into your clit that much easier, that much more pleasurable. Your limbs shuddered and you had to breathe out a more vocal huff of air in exasperation, your lungs aching while your muscles tensed in delight from Light’s direct tending to such newfound sensitivity. 
You remained paused with your eyes shut firmly as you became accustomed to the bliss that he inflicted. Light, seeming to understand exactly what he was doing to you, was a bit more forgiving now–continuing his ministrations even when you stopped, but not changing his pace or furthering the intensity enough for those feelings to grow, to bring you closer to any type of climax. It still made you moan though; still made your heart skip a beat and made your walls tighten around nothing. 
Perhaps you had been successfully swindled into playing with fire because now your mind understood a simple formula; if you wanted more, you had to keep writing. Would he let you come if you wrote your entire name down?
Would you even feel the aftershocks of your release before you died?
The prospect of death hit your lust-fogged mind like a truck, and your eyes shot open–that slowly building knot in your abdomen became a tightrope clenching out of fear rather than anticipation. This was a death note, and you were already on track to penning yourself down within it. 
Light could sense your change in stature and returned his gaze to your face once again. His hand slowed, but it was as if he could detect your worry and didn’t want to let you succumb to it–he wanted to keep you within the cusp of pleasure, to keep you malleable and submissive to his desires, not whatever lies your mind was telling you. So he kept touching you.
“You know that you can’t stop now that you’ve started, right?” He looked cocky, like he had you right where he wanted you. And it seemed that he did, because now with such confusion and so many conflicting feelings plaguing you, you weren’t sure about that–could you back out now? Was the damage already done now that your first name was almost down entirely?
Your drying lips parted as if to ask, but you couldn’t find your voice. Light let out a short, dry laugh and nodded his head, his face inches away from yours, like he fucking knew.
“Mhm. You have to keep going, now. You’d better hurry, too. You know that there’s a time limit… don’t you?”
Your lungs were burning and your hips squirmed as he traced his fingers around your core, swirling them within your copious wetness and gently prodding his fingers, hardly getting inside of you, yet you still writhed from the sensitivity of such a precise, close touch. 
You shook your head deliriously in delayed response to his words and all Light did was nod his own head toward the book again. Suddenly you were reminded of the pen in your grasp which had now absorbed the growing heat from your palm; hot to the touch. 
Noting that apparent time limit, you felt your heart thrumming as it raced and you started writing again. The pace of your fingers scraping the pen back and forth was a little quicker than before, yet you couldn’t shake that lingering hesitance even while knowing that you really should have been rushing. Light hummed as he watched, nonchalantly pushing a finger inside of you as you progressed, which made a whiny sound catch in your throat, and made your back lift slightly off the bed. 
Your arm trembled and your chicken scratch ceased again, but Light knew that he had you, because you hurried to carry on with haste once more, and he didn’t bother to stop stroking inside of you anymore. He even slid in another finger following the last time he pulled out, the added thickness made your thighs attempt to close from the new nerve-tingling pleasure that it gave, even despite the way that his body between your legs kept you nice and open for him. 
“Please,” you bartered, voice muffled and representative of the state you were in; wholly weak. He grinned and kept going, his body solid in its place on top of you, forcing you to take it even as his skilled fingers overwhelmed you so deliciously. You wanted the end result now–you wanted to come, to feel that sweet release by his hand. 
Light initiated this entire thing, he set his rules, and you knew that finishing wouldn’t happen just like that, because it wasn’t what he wanted. 
“Please what, Y/N? You already know what you have to do. Don’t play stupid.” 
The little jab at the end hurt only a little bit, making your stomach drop, making you feel as stupid as he said–but his fingertips rubbed along and pressed into your sweet spot which made you whimper, and that feeling was all you could focus on now; remedying the sting of the insult with the soothing cradle of his fingers. Oh, how successfully he was able to distract you and change the path of your thoughts once again. You could hardly bring yourself to care about such blatant manipulation, because release was getting closer and closer, and that was all you wanted.
You couldn’t even tell if the pen was pressing into the paper hard enough to leave any writing behind at all; your hand was hardly moving because your eyes remained shut in elation, and you chose to squeeze the pen in your fist as you coped with his touch, but Light just seemed content with the fact that you were resuming any transfer of penmanship at all. He was certainly rewarding you as he promised, keeping his fingers inside of you until his knuckles pushed into the plush of your pussy lips, and they rocked into you so good that you could almost feel that hard pressure in your stomach. 
It was starting to become too much–you knew how close you were getting, but you didn’t know if that’s what Light wanted. He liked to be in control of most things in his life, and you were at the very top of that list. 
“I-I can’t, I’m gonna–” 
A gasp-like mewl left you once you felt a hot, wet stroke against your clit at the same time that Light pushed rather hard against your g-spot, holding his fingers there and making you squirm. Your eyes shot open and you craned your neck off of the mattress to look down, watching as his lips closed around your clit and sucked it into his mouth, rolling his tongue over it and keeping his eyes on yours the entire time. Your entire body shuddered, it was so intense that you had to try and pull away, but he wasn’t having it, using his free hand to pin your hip down and keep you still.
“Light,” you whined, a warning to him that he was pleasing you too well too quickly, you were about to come and you were hardly finished with writing down your first name. 
His eye contact only became bolder, he didn’t relent, if anything he was trying to get more out of you; intent on making you come now. He hadn’t instructed you otherwise, so you felt safe enough to finally give in–with a weak, raspy whimper you felt yourself release that buildup of desire, your vision turning into static behind closed lids as your body writhed and churned even while he kept you down, putting himself against you with more force. Your hips rocked into his mouth to ride out every last remnant of your orgasm until you felt no more, the only sound that you could hear was your own heavy breathing and Light’s last few caresses against your audibly sopping wet pussy.
 Light moved off of you slowly, and you noted that his eyes were trained on the book rather than your body that now glistened with a light sheen of sweat. Before you could say anything to him (but even then, what could you say?), his eyes scanned over the page and your writing while he nonchalantly wiped your release off of his fingers, onto the material of your skirt. 
You followed his line of sight and looked over your work, seeing how scribbled and disastrous it was. You had probably produced better writing back in kindergarten. 
Now that your heat had finally been tended to, however; your arousal sated, you blinked a few times, then realized exactly what you were looking at: part of your name, written in the death note. 
What about the time limit? Was your first name enough to make it work either way? Your heart began to race and so did your breathing–were these the side effects of the incoming, inevitable heart attack?!
I suppose the cause wasn’t suffocation after all, a fleeting voice said so sarcastically in the back of your head, making you grimace. You propped yourself up on your elbows in a panic and your eyes flew back to Light, who was still skimming over the page with a look of maintained scrutiny. He was so… calm. Were you not about to die? Did he not care?
“That’s a good start,” he murmured, reaching out to trace his index finger (the one that wasn’t just buried in you to the hilt) along the shaky lines that hardly resembled any of the alphabet. 
“Wha–” You could only heave the word out since it felt like your heart was beating in your throat, though your body gradually relaxed as Light seemed completely neutral to the situation. The longer that he did nothing, the more time passed, and you realized that… you were still here.
When silence fell completely between both of you, Light looked over with such casualty that you felt like none of what just happened even did. 
“If we can get to your last name next time, too, maybe I’ll actually fuck you.” He slid off the bed as he spoke, his tone so normal as if he was just talking to you about the weather, making your jaw drop. He grabbed the book and closed it, walking over to the drawer and taking his sweet time ensuring that it was properly put away. 
All you could do was lay there in silent disbelief, watching him with wide eyes while he acted like nothing even happened.
“I’m fine, then?” you asked, your voice firmer and a little louder than normal, more demanding for direct answers. Light glanced over at you and laughed coldly, standing up straight once the drawer was closed once again, his hands on his hips lazily.
“I like that you’re a little dumb, Y/N. It makes things like this more exciting, don’t you think?” 
Before you could respond verbally–only able to scoff for now–Light turned to leave the room, murmuring a nearly inaudible “I’ll get some water” before the door closed behind him. His muffled footsteps became more distant as he descended downstairs, isolating you to the top floor.
Helplessly flumping back against the bed, you stared at the ceiling, reliving everything that had just happened in a mental state that you imagined neurosis to feel like. Although, you didn’t have to worry for long… you would get used to it. You understood that this was not going to be the first time something like this would happen, Light was truly only getting started with you. 
© meyousing 2023. do not share/export my work on to any other platforms. do not translate my work. 
490 notes · View notes
allysunny · 5 months
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Guiding Lights | Nanami Kento x Fem!Reader
Synopsys: Nanami barely acknowledges you once he gets home. It's late and you've been waiting for hours. Again. Lately, it's all you seem to do for your husband. Wait, while he arrives home later and later. You decide to confront him about it, and things escalate.
Words: 6.5k
Warnings: Angst, heavy angst. Like, super angsty. Arguments and yelling, mentions of cheating, neglect and death. A very tired Nanami who's overworking himself. Angst with comfort, angst to fluff. Very happy and cheesy ending. Hopefully not OOC Nanami. Do let me know if I forgot something!
A/N: Hey guys!!! Oh my god I have been working on this fic for quite a while hahaha! I started it a few months ago, but then you guys started sending in your (lovely) requests, and it sort of got lost in my drafts. But I really wanted to get it done, so I focused on it again. Also, I'm terrible at summaries, I'm so sorry!! </3
I think this is my Magnum Opus so far. I really like how it turned out. I love my man Nanami, and I love angst (lol obviously), and I've always thought about this specific scenario. This is sort of like, the fic I've always wanted to read, you know? A "fine, I'll do it myself" fic, if you will, hahaha!
Well, I hope you enjoy reading it!! I certainly had a blast writing it <3
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The door to your apartment closed as softly as it opened, and if you weren’t so intent on confronting the man who had just walked through it, you wouldn’t have heard the sound.
Looking up from the show you were watching and just paused, you take your husband in. He’s clearly seen better days. Shirt and tie slightly dishevelled, hair askew, large bags under his tired eyes. There is a big cut ripping his suit, and a smaller one on his jaw. 
“I’m home.” Nanami mumbled, taking said jacket off and placing it on top of the couch.
“Hey,” You replied, unsure of what exactly to say. You’d been awake for hours now, patiently waiting for him to come back, but now that he’s standing in front of you, you don’t know what to tell him.
You must’ve not thought things through, because instead of keeping quiet and letting this man enjoy some peace and quiet (something he seemed to lack), you decide to speak your mind.
“You’re late.”
Nanami sighed. He does not dare to meet your eye, instead making his way towards your kitchen to pour himself a glass of water. “There was a curse that needed to be exorcised. I was closer to the location, so they sent me.”
“You could’ve called.” He hadn’t even kissed you. Just walked straight to the kitchen, barely acknowledging you. “I was worried.”
“Well, I was busy.” Nanami put his glass down and rubbed his forehead. He looked drained. The sharp edges of his face look like they could cut your fingers, should you touch him. The exhaustion was piling over him, and it was clear to see.
You didn’t wish to push his buttons – God knows how hard his work as a Jujutsu Sorcerer was. But it’s not fair for him to leave for hours on end without telling you his location. You don’t want to control him, nor keep tabs on him all the time; you just want to make sure he is safe and doing okay.
You just want to make sure your husband will return to you and your son at the end of the day.
“And you couldn’t have spared me a minute? Just a text would’ve been fine.” You said, standing up and walking to him. Too busy to call? It would take him less than a minute to tell you he was safe.
“[Y/N], I didn’t have the time to call you.” Now he looked at you. Those beautiful hazel eyes which usually regarded you with affection and care, looked fatigued and weary. These eyes belong to a man who has seen too much, a man who is in desperate need of rest. But no matter how much you tried to coerce him into taking a break, he wouldn’t have any of it.
Ever since you had your son, he was more intent than ever on working and making sure curses were exorcised as soon as they appeared. All to keep your bundle of joy safe, to make sure he grew up in a better world. But lately, it seemed like he was stretching himself too thin, taking on every single mission, arriving home later and later.
“I was worried sick. You look hurt.” Nanami looked away once more when you approached him. Just as you were about to raise your hand and inspect his jaw, he turned away from you.
“I’m fine. You should go to sleep. It’s late.” His voice was almost devoid of any emotion. Is this what Jujutsu Sorcery did to people? Wear them down, strip them of their humanity and emotions until they were but a vessel of what they had once been?
When you first started dating, Nanami couldn’t get enough of you. He’d get home on time, every single day, just so he wouldn’t keep you waiting. He’d treat you like you were precious, because to him, you were. And now it seemed like he was perpetually tired, like there was something holding him back from the sweet man he had once been. You suspected he hadn’t held your son in a few days. Nanami always stopped by Haibara’s room before he went to sleep, just to watch his slow breathing and make sure all was well. But it had been weeks since you had seen him hold his child.
“Kento, you’re not fine. Just… Stop pushing me away. Please.” You reached out to touch his arm, and he shakes it away.
“Look, I appreciate your concern, but it’s just a scratch. I’ve had worse.” How could he be so careless about his health? Was he not aware of the family waiting for him at home?
You shake your head. You really didn’t want to do this. Not today. Not now. You’re tired – Haibara had been fussy all day, asking for “papa”, and there was nothing you could do to soothe him. And your husband looked tired too. Let’s not do this today. Not now. Go to bed, you thought. Go to bed.
Unfortunately, your mouth was quicker.
“Oh, yeah? Well, when’s it gonna be enough?” You questioned, crossing your arms over your chest. “It’s just a scratch. Well, yesterday was just a scratch as well. So was the day before. And the day before that. Is tomorrow going to be just a scratch as well?” Your voice was rising, and you were fighting hard to keep the tears away. “It’s always justa scratch. When is it going to be enough for you to stop? When’s it going to stop being just a scratch? Huh? When you break an arm?”
“[Y/N].”
“When you lose a limb?”
“[Y/N].”
“When you lose your life?!” You tightened the grip you had around your body, using your arms as a shield against the despair and hopelessness you felt. You seemed to have stunned your husband into silence. Nanami breathed softly, looking at the floor. “When is it going to be enough for you?”
“I’m doing this for your sake.” He mumbled softly. 
“Maybe you were, once. But not anymore. No, you’re doing this for yourself.” 
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Now it was your husband’s turn to raise his voice ever so slightly. His fists were clenched by his side, and his shoulders moved in sync with his breathing. “I’m out there, every night, doing this for you. For our son, for our family.” 
“No, you’re not!” 
“Yes, I am! If I’m out there, exorcising those disgusting creatures, it’s because I want our son to grow up in a safer world! I don’t want him to live in fear, I want him to be safe. And that’s exactly what I do.” 
“You say you care about your son, but you haven’t seen him in days.” You scoffed and shook your head. How could he say such things when you knew damn well he hadn’t even seen him? Let alone hold him or play with him. And the lack of attention from his father was clearly taking a toll on Haibara, who cried and cried, eyes anxiously looking for the tall figure he learned to associate with comfort. Not that he didn’t like you - you were his mother, and arguably, the only person he truly knew, but a baby boy needs his father, and Haibara didn’t seem to have his. 
You stare at your husband, noticing how time has changed him. The once gentle features have turned knifelike, his eyebags have become wide and deep, his eyes perpetually tired behind the fatiguing-looking glasses. What could possibly be more important than his family?
An unsettling feeling starts pooling in your stomach. You’ve tried not to entertain this idea for long - hell, you couldn’t think about it without becoming nauseous. Because he would never, would he? He’s your husband. The father of your child. Meeting another woman behind your back is clearly unthinkable, right?
The voice in your head that you’ve been trying to quiet down this whole time gets louder and louder. Ask him, it says, ask him and find out the truth. You deserve to know it, you’re his wife. What if he’s hiding something? Ask him. 
You want to trust your husband. You really do. You love him and always have and always will. But your mind is playing tricks on you, the weariness of the day and lack of comfort from this very same man messing with your brain. 
“Is it someone else?” You ask, feeling braver than you felt.
“What!?” he looked at you, eyes wide in surprise. As if what you’d ask was completely preposterous (to him, it was). 
“Have you been seeing someone else, Kento? Is that why you’re not home?” You were sounding surprisingly calm for a woman accusing her husband of cheating on her. 
Your husband shook his head vigorously, looking you in the eye. 
“I’m not. I haven’t been seeing anyone else.” You got a glimpse at your Nanami, the one who’s caring and sweet, the one who holds you when you cry and talks softly when you’re overwhelmed. You see him right now, in the way he assures you there’s no one else. 
“You’re not home. You arrive late, leave at the crack of dawn. Don’t hold our son, don’t touch me. Is this why? Do you have someone else? Do you love someone else?”
“[Y/N], I told you, there is no one else. I’m not seeing anyone,” he sighed, signalling his own exhaustion (as if it wasn’t evident by the way it clung to his face, body, and soul). “I’ve just been busy.” Nanami repeated, turning away from you, to place his glass in the sink.
“Too busy to see your own son?” 
“I told you, I’ve been busy, [Y/N].”
“He’s your son!” 
“This is my job - “
“We’re your family!” 
“Well, you can’t expect me to stay home all the time and cater to your every whim, can you?” Nanami had never yelled. Never in your time together you’d heard him raise his voice at anyone, let alone you. But the man before you couldn’t be your husband because he’d done just that.
“I’m not asking you to stay home and cater to my every whim!” Tears clouded your vision, and you stuttered pathetically, still trying to hold your ground. “I’m just asking you to be more considerate!” The more you spoke, the more you stuttered, the more your tears fell. Nanami, your sweet Nanami, your caring and loving husband would’ve never allowed this years ago. He’d have embraced you and kissed your forehead and wiped your tears. The man before you has no intention of doing that. 
“I have a job to do, [Y/N], I have a duty, I made a promise -” 
“You made a promise to me when we got married!” You wiped your tears away. Or tried to - they wouldn’t stop coming, big lousy tears that ran down your cheeks and made you feel even more miserable. “You made a promise to our son when he was born! And now look at you - you haven’t held him in days!” 
“He’s a baby, [Y/N]. He won’t die from lack of affection from me. God damn it, he won’t even remember it! You’re making a big deal out of nothing!” 
“You say that because you don’t spend time with him! I’m not making a big deal out of nothing; I’m telling you you’re neglecting your son!” 
“[Y/N], he’s a baby!”
“He misses his father!” Now it was you yelling, sleep and rest long forgotten. No, right now, all you wanted was to get to the bottom of this, to once and for all make your husband see reason. “He cries for you because he misses you! I miss you! Your family misses you terribly and all you’re doing is pushing us away!” 
An ear-piercing cry erupted from the monitor next to you. Hell, you probably didn’t even need the monitor. Haibara’s cries were loud and heart wrenching, and you snapped out of your rage fuelled trance as soon as you heard them. 
“Haibara,” you whispered, pushing past your husband and all but flying upstairs. You opened the door to your son’s nursery, and maternal instinct took over as you made your way towards his crib and picked him up. His tiny fists were clenched, and he waved his arms and legs around, crying his little heart out. 
“Shhhh, shhhh…” You cooed softly, taking him in your arms and pressing soft kisses against his forehead. “Mommy’s sorry, my love… Mommy was yelling, wasn’t she? She’s sorry… It won’t happen again my darling, I promise… I’m so sorry…” You cried, cradling his little body against yours.
Upon hearing your voice, his cries subsided, and the baby looked up at you with teary eyes, hands coming up to touch your wet cheeks. 
“Mama?” He asked in that tiny voice of his.
“Yes, my love, mama’s right here. I’m sorry. Mama was yelling, it must’ve been so scary.” You wiped his tears, kissing the top of his head. 
“Mama,” he said again, tapping his hands on your face once more, as if making sure you were there.
“Yes baby, mama’s here. Mama’s right here.”
“Papa?” Haibara looked around, and his lips turned into a pout once more. “Papa?” 
“I’m sorry, my love. Papa’s busy. He’s working hard to keep us safe,” Please don’t cry again, you thought, go to sleep baby, just go to sleep. Mommy needs rest too, especially after today. 
“Papa? Papa?” His cries became more insistent, and you tried your best not to burst into tears again. You felt like a failure. A failure of a wife, a failure of a mother. You felt like the home you tried too hard to build and cherish and fill with love was crumbling apart. 
“Go to sleep baby, okay? Papa’s busy, but he’ll see you some other time. Right now, he needs to rest because he’s been working so hard… And so do you, baby. Just get some rest, alright? Please.”
You sniffled a few times, singing and talking to him slowly, the way you knew calmed him down. “I’m so sorry for yelling honey, so, so sorry… It won’t happen again… How scary it must’ve been for you… It’s alright now, see? Mommy’s here, she won’t yell anymore…” 
You rocked Haibara and placed him so he was lying down in your arms. He looked at you first with a confused gaze, then with a small smile, and finally with a sleepy expression. Your sweet baby boy, who was all furrowed brown and blonde locks of hair, exactly like his father. Your sweet, sweet son, who’d babble in excitement when you twirled him around the living room and danced around as soft music played and knocked his head against yours in a loving gesture. He was your one weakness. You’d do anything for him. 
The love you have for this child is stronger than words can communicate, and you wonder how Nanami can possibly ignore him as easily as he does. 
You rocked Haibara some more, humming a tune you knew he liked. Once you turned around, you spotted Nanami leaning against the door, staring at the both of you in a mix of awe, hurt and sadness.
You returned his gaze, unsure of what to say. 
What even was there to say? 
The life you’d so lovingly built for yourselves seemed to have come crashing down, until all that was left were broken pieces.
Nanami approached you two, with slow heavy steps. Once you managed to get a good look at his face, something inside you broke. 
Nanami was crying. 
Big, silent tears rolled down his cleverly sculpted cheeks, and his eyes drifted to the sleepy baby in your arms. 
And then he did something neither of you were expecting. 
He sobbed. 
Loudly. 
So loud, little Haibara stirred in your arms, looking over to the source of the sound. 
His face twisted in confusion, and his pouty lips parted to utter a single word. 
“Papa,” he babbled, hand pointing in his direction. “Papa. Papa. Papa.” Haibara mumbled over and over again, arms flailing in Nanami’s direction. He twisted his whole body, muttering “Papa” and whining loudly.
“Haibara,” Nanami whispered, hands coming up to cradle his son - an adorable sight, really. Your husband, with his big, strong hands, handling a tiny baby with the utmost care. He held Haibara straight, and cried once the baby knocked his head against his, gurgling in excitement and flailing his arms around. 
“Papa!” If your son was or had been sleepy, he didn’t show it, instead babbling a single word repeatedly, hands either coming up to touch his father’s face, waving around, or clapping. “Papa!” 
You wondered how long it had been since Nanami had held him. It was clear Haibara missed him, and although the sight before you was heartwarming, it still hurt that, for this to happen, Nanami had to ignore his child. 
“My son,” Nanami cradled Haibara carefully, leaning his forehead against the baby’s. “My sweet, sweet son. I have been such an idiot. I’m so sorry…” He kept on sobbing, kissing Haibara all over his face, head, and hands, as if trying to convey his regret in some way. “I’ve failed you. I’m so sorry.” 
It was both heartbreaking and heart enriching. There he was, your husband, finally holding his son, finally apologising, finally making amends. You knew him to be telling the truth. Nanami might be stoic and cold on the outside, but you got to him. You knew him, inside and out. You could tell when he was genuine, and, well, he’d never been more genuine than now. 
Nanami turned to look at you, eyes still puffy from the tears. He shook his head once, then twice, then turned to face his son once again. 
“I’m so sorry… I’ve been neglecting you all this time… My family, my own family… I promised to take care of you…” This confession only made him sob louder. Your son quickly picked up on the atmosphere because he too started pouting, and expressing his discomfort through sounds. 
“Oh -” Nanami was quick to change the baby’s position, making him lie down on his arms. “Shhh, it’s okay. Everything’s fine now, alright? Why don’t you go to sleep and give your mother some rest?” 
“Papa,” Haibara blinked his eyes once and reached up to touch his father’s face. Nanami smiled, holding his son’s little hand in his, pressing a soft kiss against it. 
“That’s right. Papa. Papa’s here.” 
“Pa - pa,” Your son was interrupted by a big yawn. He blinked at his father once again, and quickly turned around, snuggling against his arms and chest. 
There was something about tall and strong 7 to 3 sorcerer Nanami Kento melt while holding a tiny baby in his arms that made you chuckle. You wiped your tears and watched as your husband kissed your son’s forehead one last time, before putting him down on his crib once again.
Nanami made sure to check Haibara’s crib, gazing at him with that adoring look in his eyes, before exiting the room. You did the same and did not need to be told twice - you followed your husband, who was already in your shared bedroom, sitting on his side of the bed and facing the wall. 
Leaning against the doorframe, you stared at him. 
None of you wanted to break the small bubble you’d been immersed in. Although you hadn’t spoken with each other, the last few minutes with Haibara had spoken volumes. It was as if the ocean of hurt and neglect had been breached by the child who was a careful mix of the two. 
And yet, it still hurt to address the elephant in the room. 
You’d hated yelling at Nanami. You’d never done it. And he’d never yelled at you. Not even towards his most eccentric and insufferable coworkers, Nanami dared to yell. He believed arguments and misunderstandings could be solved without raising one’s voice. But he’d gone and done the one thing he promised never to do.
It was Nanami who, after what seemed like an eternity, reached across the ocean. 
“I’ve lost my focus,” he said, still staring at the wall. “I’ve gone and ruined the one good thing in my life.” 
All you could do was listen. You’d waited too long to hear these words. 
“The truth is, I’m scared.” There it was again, that vulnerability in his voice, that softness and truth that reminded you your sweet husband too was human. “I’ve been scared ever since Haibara was born. I want to make the world a better place for him. I don’t want him to grow up surrounded by curses, always looking over his shoulder in fear…” He clenched his fists, only this time, the anger wasn’t directed towards you. 
“I thought if only I worked hard… If only I worked all these extra hours, I'd be making a difference. I’d be protecting my family.” 
You had no control over your body, but it didn’t matter. Your heart would always follow Nanami Kento, and right now, it was telling you to go to him. You stood near the bed, just a few feet away from his sitting figure. 
“You are protecting your family,” you said, just as softly as him. 
“No - no, I’m not. What if something happens while I’m gone? What if I’m not home, and someone gets to you first?” Nanami sighed, voice laced with fear. You could tell he was close to tears once again. “I’ve been so busy trying to take on each and every mission, I forgot to protect my family in the most important way - next to them.” 
You remained silent. 
There was nothing you could come up with. He was right. Those were your words and your thoughts. Then why was it that when they were finally uttered, you felt sadness rather than happiness or relief? It pained to see your husband hurting. 
You sat down next to him, and placed a hand on his shoulder, an encouraging gesture. 
“I miss you…” he continued, tears now running freely. “I miss you two so much… Haibara… Haibara’s growing up without a father… And it’s all my fault…” Hunching over his knees, Nanami took his face in his hands, crying silently. “And you, my love - you’ve been here all this time, working so hard to keep our family together, and I was too blind to appreciate it… I’m so sorry…” 
He then looked at you, and you saw years of your relationship fly by. 
In his eyes, you saw your first meeting. You saw the day he bought you coffee for the first time. Satoru playing matchmaker. You saw your first date, full of nervousness and a fleeting kiss that lasted no longer than a few seconds but was enough to leave you both flustered and breathless. You saw the day he asked you to be his girlfriend, a bouquet of bright pink camelias in his hand. Him holding you close after you’d loved each other for the first time, hands tracing patterns on your back, whispering words of appreciation and love in your ear. 
You saw your wedding day, the first dance you two shared and how he smiled like a fool despite all the teasing from Satoru and his students. You saw him carry box after box, unpacking items and decorating what would later become your loving home. You saw the way he cried in your arms when you showed him the positive pregnancy test, and how he kneeled before you to kiss your stomach. 
You saw him holding your hair back while you puked, always so attentive, making sure you were fine. Him massaging your feet, rubbing your legs and preparing you meals according to your cravings. You saw him hold Haibara for the first time, hazel eyes ever the softest. You saw him sleep with your baby the first few weeks to ensure you had enough rest. 
You watched as he got up earlier and earlier each morning, some of them even going as far as to forget to kiss you goodbye. You saw him arrive later and later, claiming he was “too tired” to eat with you, “too busy” to see your son. 
You saw all of this in a span of just a few seconds. You saw all the love, the regret, the hurt, the pain, the happiness and desire, all of it. You saw the life you had carved together, the house decorated to your and his liking, the way it just felt like home, and lately felt like anything but.
Nanami left the bed and knelt before you, eyes still watery. 
“I’m so sorry,” he started. “I’ve been a neglectful husband. I’ve been taking you and our son for granted.” Slowly, he took your hands in his. You allow him, having missed his warmth, his comfort. “Will you forgive me?”
That was the question. 
Would you?
Could you? 
“You don’t have to answer me right now,” he shook his head, thumbs circling your palms affectionately. “You can take all the time you want. You can think about it, make me suffer all you want - hell, I deserve it, after all that I put you through. Just… think about it. Please. Even if you never forgive me, just know that I am so, so sorry for all the suffering I caused you. I’ve been such a terrible husband…” 
HIs cries don’t seem to subside, and he lays his head on top of your hands. 
It breaks you to see your husband like this. No matter how much you were hurting, no matter how much you missed him and his absence broke you inside, you never wanted to see him hurting.
Instinctively, your hands flew to his hair, caressing it softly, massaging his scalp like you always did during lazy Saturday mornings, when he’s clingy and needy after having worshiped your body thoroughly, or during Sunday afternoons, when you watched your son play with his toys in the garden. 
Nanami’s shoulders sagged, and he rested his head fully on your legs.
You think about what he said. 
Forgiveness. 
Could you ever forgive you husband after all the pain he’s caused? 
After the late nights spent with dread, fearing the worst, after the early mornings devoid of any affection and love, after the distant weekends and inexistent holidays?
But even as you thought this over, your heart had already decided for you. 
You’d walk to the end of the earth for Nanami Kento. And you were sure he’d do the same. 
Delicate hands are placed on the sides of his face, and your husband looked up, a pained expression in his eyes. 
“I love you,” you whispered, hoping that somehow, someway, these three little words would convey just how deep your adoration for this man goes. “Of course I’ll forgive you, Kento.” 
His chocolate brown eyes seem to sparkle, and he holds his head higher. 
“What?”
“I love you. We can fix this. I know we can.” 
“Yes - [Y/N], yes. We can. I can. I will. I promise you.” Kento placed his hands on top of yours, holding them gently. After all, he’s holding the entire world in his hands. 
And although you just want to skip to the good part, you shake your head, interrupting him before he can get too excited. 
“But,” you began, “You need to change. This needs to change, Kento. I… I can’t raise a child on my own. I can’t nurture a home all by myself.”
“Yes - yes, you’re right. My love, I’m so sorry.”
“I won’t ask you to give up Jujutsu Sorcery.”
At this, he seems to tense a bit. You knew how important your husband’s job was to him. After all, he was keeping people safe, making the world a better place. It was terrifying, but it made him happy, and that’s all you could ask for. 
“Just… Be more careful.” These words are uttered with the utmost softness, in fear of breaking the little trance you were in. “You have a wife waiting at home for you. A son. Your family needs you. And I know you’re making a difference out there, but we also need you here. With us.”
“And if some day, you do end up working overtime, just… Please say something. Just to let me know. I don’t want to know your whereabouts all the time, I don’t want to control you. I just need to know you’re safe.”
Nanami nodded. Eagerly. It was as if you’d just told him you would gift him his weight in gold three times. In fact, you’d given him something better than that. Your love. Your forgiveness. To Nanami, getting you back, winning your trust again, that’s what truly mattered. 
“Thank you.” He kissed your hands. “I will. I promise, I’ll change. I’ll be a better husband for you, and a better father to Haibara. My love… My sweet wife, the love of my life… I can’t believe I took you for granted. I was so worried about failing you, I forgot what was truly important. My family.”
“Kento,” you said, shaking your head. Your eyes filled with tears once again. “You have never disappointed us. You will never fail us.”
“If I didn’t work hard enough to clear the world of curses, I would. If I don’t make a difference, I’m letting you two down. I want to protect you. I don’t want to lose you like I lost…” Nanami was unable to finish his sentence. You knew he still felt responsible for the death of his friend. Too responsible. When you suggested naming your son after his best friend, he’d choked up and cried. It is a beautiful tribute, he’d tell you later. “I don’t want to disappoint you.”
“Nonsense.” You spread your legs and pulled him by his face. Nanami quickly got the hint and stood in between them, facing you directly. “You are making a difference, Nanami Kento. You’re making the world a better place. Haibara and I are so proud of you.”
Nanami wept, and you wept with him. He leaned his forehead against yours, and you cried together, not sure of where his tears ended and yours began. You closed your eyes, hands still on his cheeks. 
“I’ve been such a terrible husband. Such a terrible father.”
“It will get better. Promise me you will be better.”
“I will. I promise. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
“It’s in the past now, Kento. Let’s focus on the future. Please.”
“I’ll make it better. Cross my heart, [Y/N], I will. I’ll start right damn now, by doing something I haven’t done in a long time.”
Nanami took your chin in his hand, angling you towards him. Then, he leaned forward, kissing you softly. You let out a noise of contentment and kissed him back, hands pulling his face impossibly closer. It’d been a while since he’d touched you, let alone kissed you. You missed this. You missed him. 
You kissed him with the hunger of a starved woman, and he kissed you with all the regret he had. You poured all your sorrow into this kiss, while he tried to communicate just how much he loved you. Your tongues moved in sync, and the kiss felt like home. 
When you eventually parted for air, Nanami opened his eyes, taking you in. Eyes red from the tears, cheeks puffy, lips plump and swollen. He hated seeing you in pain but thought himself deserving of torture for making you suffer this much. 
“I missed you,” he whispered, kissing your lips again, this time quicker. 
“I missed you too,” you replied with what looked like a hint of a smile. You hadn’t smiled in a while. Nanami knew this and chastised himself mentally. Never again would you suffer like him. And never again would he be the cause of your pain. 
“I’m taking the rest of the week off,” he mumbled, staring into your eyes. He’d almost forgotten how they had the loveliest of colours. In fact, they’d become his favourite shade. Waking up to those gorgeous eyes of yours had once been his greatest joy in life. He would make sure to make it a priority once again. “Damn it, I’ll take the whole month off. We’ll spend some time together. Just you, me, and Haibara. How does that sound?”
You giggled. And how lovely was the sound of your laughter.
“That sounds perfect. I’d love that very much. I think Haibara would too.” 
“Yeah? You think so?”
“I know so. He’s been missing you too much. I’m sure he’ll be delighted to spend some time with Papa.” 
“Well, I am ecstatic to spend some time with my little one. And my beautiful wife as well.” This one earned a bigger smile from you, and you wrapped your arms around his neck, crashing your lips onto his with vigour. 
Nanami chuckled against your lips, and parted from you, getting up and extending his hand towards you. When you cast him a confused look, he nudged his head towards the en-suite bathroom. 
“I need to wash the day off me. Will you join me? Please?” 
And how could you refuse when he asked you so nicely?
The bath was by far the most relaxing time you’d had the past few months. You sat with your back against Nanami’s chest, and felt the tension leave your body as he lovingly massaged your shoulders and back, placing kisses along the line of your neck. 
You washed his hair, massaging his scalp and putting his hair up in all sorts of weird shapes, earning a few smiles from him. 
You kissed him with slow languid kisses, caressing his jaw, shedding a few tears of happiness, sadness, sorrow. He replied tenfold, whispering words of adoration against your lips. 
It wasn’t sexual or lustful. 
It was caring, slow, loving. It was a man showering his life with love, showing her he cared, showing her he loved and cherished her, and would never again take her for granted. 
Once you two had rinsed off and dried yourselves with towels, Nanami gently applied body lotion in your body, kissing the spots he’d covered in hydrating cream. 
“You smell nice,” he mumbled against his skin. 
He carried you to bed, lying you down and scooting over to you. How you’d missed being held by the man you loved. How you’d missed his weight next to yours, his arms around your waist, pulling you close. You turned to him, nuzzling his torso with your nose, placing your hand on top of his chest. You could feel his heartbeat and relished in it. It meant he was alive. He wasn’t dead in some ditch, all alone and away from his family. He was right there next to you, safe and sound. 
“I’m sorry for getting lost.” You heard Nanami whisper a few moments later, when the world is quiet and dark, when you two were the only souls still awake.
“You’re back now. You came back to us. Thank you for coming back.” You kissed his pectoral, and he kissed your forehead. An exchange. 
“I won’t get lost again. I promise. Not as long as I have you to guide me. You’re my light, [Y/N]. My guiding light. You and Haibara. I love you two so, so much. I would do anything for you. My family.” 
“We love you too. We’re so glad you’re back.”
“And I’m here to stay. I really am. Tomorrow’s going to be all about you two, I promise. I’m sorry I yelled. I’m sorry I said Haibara wouldn’t remember. I wasn’t thinking straight. I was tired. I know that’s not really an excuse, but I promise to make up for that behaviour.”
This is what you loved most about your husband. He was down to earth. He recognised his flaws and worked on them. Whenever he made a mistake, he made sure to apologize for it. Your arguments in the past (although small and dumb compared to today) had never gone unresolved, with calmness and willingness to listen from both parties. You could count on your husband to be the respectful diplomat.
You looked up at him. He had his brows furrowed, the way he always did when he was thinking, the way you’d seen your son do once or twice. He was the spitting image of his father.
“I know,” you said, caressing his jaw. “I’m sorry too. For yelling. For saying all those things. Saying you didn’t care about us. I know you do. You’ve been busy, but –“
“No.” Nanami interrupted you. “Don’t that. Don’t say it’s not my fault. I appreciate your apology, and I understand what you mean. But you were right. I mean, I do care.  You know I do. But I lost sight of what truly mattered.” The cadence of his voice soothed you, and your eyes got heavier as each second went by.
“I was actually going to say, ‘You’ve been busy, but that’s no excuse to brush off your family’. Oh no, Mister, you aren’t getting off the hook so easily.”
Nanami chuckled and kissed your forehead once again.
“You’d never let me, I know.”
A few silent moments went by, with only the sounds of your and Nanami’s soft breathings signalling your presence.
“[Y/N]?” It was quietly ushered, and you’d miss it if you weren’t so connected to this man.
“Yeah?” you replied, just as quietly. It was such a fragile moment. Better not to speak too loudly in order not to break it.
“I love you.”
You smiled.
“I love you too.”
He heard the smile in your voice, and it made him smile too.
“You’re the love of my life.”
“You’re the love of my life as well.”
More silence.
Followed by your husband, again.
“I love our family.”
“I love our family too.”
You snuggled closer, inhaling his scent. It was intoxicating. Musky and manly, and it made you swoon every time. Great choice in body wash – a choice made by you.
“Are you smelling me?” Nanami chuckled, his eyes too closing.
“You smell really good.” Now you were the mumbling one. Nanami had to work really hard to understand what you were saying.
Perhaps the night had run its course.
“Goodnight, my love,” he whispered, placing one last kiss on top of your head.
“Night night, ‘Nami…”
You fell asleep in your husband’s arms with a content smile, and a full heart, and Nanami refused to let you go.
He’d lost focus, been to hell and back, too afraid to let his family down.
But as he held half of his world in his arms (and lovingly thought about the other half, comfortably tucked in his crib), Nanami felt blessed. He’d gotten incredibly lucky, with an amazing woman who loved him for who he was and always made sure to remind him of that, and a son who inspired him to be a better man every day that went by.
As he thought about how wonderful his life was, Nanami smiled.
You and Haibara, his guiding lights.
He would never get lost again.
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A/N: That's it! Whew!!! Well, once again, I really hope you guys liked it! I loved writing it - Nanami and angst might be my favourite combination, hahaha. Or anyone and angst. I just really like the feels. Anyway, I hope you guys have an amazing day!
475 notes · View notes
transmascaraa · 21 days
Note
Hi, Hi, Hi! How are you?
I am the one, who requested the FREEZING hands and I loved it. Thanks for the food. I really, really loved it! And I have another request! Their s/o just randomly telling them what their first impression of them was, when they first saw them. They always heard of like their intimidating/cold behaviour or looks, but when their s/o first saw them they didn’t think that. They thought like “Such a cutie patootie! Awww! Look at how adorable he is! I just wanna squish those cheeks!”
Could I request Cyno, Alhaitham, Wriothesley & Diluc with that? (And could I be an anon? 🪶 anon please? Pretty please?)
STAY HYDRATED, EAT ENOUGH AND HAVE A PROPER SLEEP SCHEDULE!
multiple characters headcannons!
"cutie patootie!"
characters: cyno, alhaitham, wriothesley, diluc x gn!reader
author's note: OFC I ALREADY ADDED YOU TO THE ANONS ON MY INTRODUCTION POST^^ i love this and this is probably how i would act if i was actually in genshin aka teyvat idk anyways enjoy reading this!!
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๑ Cyno
-you when you just told him this he still had a neutral look on his face.
-"and they all told me you were so so SO scary! but when i first saw you- I WANTED TO BITE YOUR CHEEKS AFFECTIONATELY!!!"
-he looked a little confused.
-"bite my cheeks?-"
-"THEY'RE SO SQUISHY!!"
-you got closer to him and cupped his face in your hands, basically squishing his cheeks, and then giving him a kiss on the nose.
-"y'know, i still feel the same about you. i don't know what the hell others are going on about."
-he's never received much affection in his life before so he's kinda confused about it, despite his cheeks getting redder and warmer by second, ever if he didn't realize it.
-"uh- thanks?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
✧ Alhaitham
-you start ranting to him but the first few minutes he isn't even listening to you and is instead reading some book even tho he said he's literally listening.
-"'haitham! are you even listening?"
-"huh? uhm- sorry- can you repeat what you were saying?"
-you're a bit annoyed but do it anyway, and this time ge actually listens.
-"yeah? what about us when we first met?"
-he's impatient for you to finish but also curious about what you're about to say.
-now he's a bit surprised.
-"I JUST WANTED TO SQUISH YOUR CHEEKS AAH!!!!!-"
-he's SLIGHTLY blushing and has a MICROSCOPIC smile on his face but yeah.
-he's happy to know it but also- how the fuck did you think that he was a "cutie patootie" as you said?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
✿ Wriothesley
-bro would be flabbergasted but smirking at you teasingly the whole damn time
-"AND I THOUGHT YOU WERE SO FUCKING CUTE!"
-"mhm..."
-"oh~?"
-"yeah..~
-you would be blushing halfway but he'll let you continue lmao
-then he'd start talking about how he felt when you first met too and it would honestly be really cute imo
-but like okay dude why you looking at me like you'll ask me to kiss youu
-he probably will tho tbh
-not much left to say but he'll really enjoy listening to you and all cuz bffr you're 753 times more special to him cuz you didn't find him intimidating like literally everyone told you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
✯ Diluc
-he'll deny it the whole time that he finds you so adorable ranting to him about it
-but then again he appreciates it
-even tho he wishes you actually found him scary or intimidating
-"AND LIKE- YOU LOOKED SO CUTE THAT I WANTED TO JUST GRAB YOU BY YOUR HANDS AND JUST KISS YOU WHOLE FACE ALL OVER AND-"
-"i don't understand you... how the fuck do i look- what was the word... skrunkly-?"
-you laughed your ass off at that but like okay
-he looked even more confused lol
-but no matter how little he understands you, he'll always be sure to actually pay attention to you cuz he doesn't want you to feel forgotten or worth any less than you are
-he'll do his best to not come off as too rude or mean but he genuinely thinks your thoughts sometimes are weird af
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
loved this one definitely
i didn't know what other word to use except for skrunkly but alr
HOPE YOU LIKED IT‼️
| 🪶anon | @mariaace <3
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seohwang · 1 year
Text
Bedroom mishaps. (Hyung line)
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An Ateez reaction to getting into an embarrassing/awkward situation while intimate
Genre: fluff, smut (nothing too explicit, though)
Word count: 6 401
Warnings: mature themes (obviously), embarrassing moments and just awkwardness in general, lol
Dynamics: mostly sub!ateez-leaning or with no dynamics, except for mild dom!Seonghwa
A/N: So, this whole idea randomly came to me when I was reading @blu-joons​​‘s fic about Ateez getting a massage (which is why Yeosang’s scenario is kinda similar to theirs in the beginning, hope that’s okay!!) and my mind just kind of went on from there, haha. I’ve always loved reading fics about the more awkward/funny/weird parts of sex, so I’ve decided to write my own as well ♥ Hope you enjoy!
A/N 2: I’ve just posted the maknae version of this fic as well! You can find it here.
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Hongjoong
Hongjoong is a busy man.
In fact, he can get so busy with his work that you barely even see him during the entire week
You knew what you were getting into, though
After all, he’d made sure to tell you about twenty times when you first began dating
You obviously decided to step up to the challenge nonetheless, knowing full well that it wouldn’t stop you from wanting to date him in any way
And while that still held true for both you and Hongjoong, it definitely did get pretty lonely at times, especially during the past few weeks
Your boyfriend was working on a huge song project this month, meaning he barely even had the time to care for himself, let alone to properly indulge in you as his partner
You didn’t seem to mind, however, cheering him on from afar and bringing him food to the studio whenever you had the time
And even when you didn’t, you still made sure to let him know you were thinking of him through the occasional texts you’d send him
And while it didn’t really seem like much to you, to Hongjoong, your love and care were an absolute lifesaver
Whenever he was having a hard time or finally decided to take a short break from working, he always made sure to check his phone first and foremost, looking forward to everything that had accumulated in your private chat by then
It didn’t matter whether it was a cute message of encouragement or a random meme you’d stumbled across
To Hongjoong, it was the closest feeling of home he would probably be able to afford that day, if not that week
But as encouraging and heart-warming as your gestures were, after a while, he couldn’t help but feel guilty
Guilty for being away for so long, for not giving you nearly as much attention as you gave him and rightfully deserved, and just for everything in general
So, when he was finally done with everything and had a few-day break after what seemed like forever, he was rushing home to you, ready to make it up to you in any way he could
Luckily for him, you were already home when he got there, relaxing on the couch after a long day with the whole weekend ahead of you
He didn’t get to see you like that, however, as by the time he closed the door behind him, you were already rushing to the entrance yourself, thrilled to finally see your boyfriend home again
“Hongjoong!” You called out excitedly as you ran to him, jumping into his arms when he turned around at your voice
Barely managing to catch you in time, Hongjoong let out a small grunt, which was quickly followed by a chuckle as you snuggled impossibly tight into him
“Hi, baby,” he muttered into your hair, giving the crown of your head a small kiss as he held you in his arms
Sooner or later, though, you had to pull yourself away from him, letting him take off his hat and jacket properly
Your affection didn’t cease one bit, however, as you then proceeded to follow him all around your apartment, giving him little hugs and kisses as he did his usual routine after returning home from work
At last, the two of you found yourself in the bedroom, with you sitting on the bed while Hongjoong went on to change into something more comfortable
One would think he’d be a bit more apprehensive or shy about you watching him change, but, honestly, after being together for so long, there really weren’t any more secrets between the two of you
With a small, tired sigh, Hongjoong finally managed to take off his hoodie, only to realize he still had another layer of clothing underneath to take off
He let out a dissatisfied whine at the realization, making you chuckle as you watched the whole thing unfold before you
“Hold on babe,” you suddenly spoke, making him stop in his tracks as you got up and walked over to him, “let me help you.”
Any other time, Hongjoong would have probably rejected your help, fully capable of taking off his own clothes, thank you very much
But right now, after countless hours of stiffly sitting at his computer, it felt as if his arms had turned into stone, tired and sore whenever he raised them up too high
So, with a soft “thank you”, he let you grab the hem of his T-shirt, pulling it over his head carefully before tossing it into the hamper
“Want me to take off your pants too?” You asked him, not realizing how your question sounded until you saw the blush spreading across Hongjoong’s face
“I, uh, s-sure,” he managed to stutter out, feeling his entire face heat up at the sudden glint in your eyes when he said that
Without wasting a single second, you dropped to your knees, hands swiftly unbuckling the belt of his pants before pulling them down fully
Hongjoong let out an embarrassed sound at your actions, the visual of you like this being too much for him in that moment
He hadn’t seen you properly in so long, so to see you like this all of a sudden? He was positively melting
You definitely knew what you were doing, that much was obvious
From the increasing handsiness to the playful spark in your eye and your teasing smile, which only seemed to widen when you noticed the growing bulge in his pants, Hongjoong could tell that there was only one thing on your mind right now
Getting back up, you moved closer to him, giving him a sly smile as one of your hands wrapped around his waist, the other pulling his own hand up to do the same to you, effectively pressing the two of you together
“Y/N...” Hongjoong said in a mere whisper, only now realizing just how much he’d been missing your touch
“You wanna take this further?” You asked softly, eyeing him up and down as you spoke, “if you aren’t too tired, that is.”
Hongjoong grinned shyly at your words, heart fluttering at the care in your voice and actions
Gently cradling your cheek in his free hand, he brought you into a sweet, chaste kiss
“I’m never too tired for you.”
Well-
It would soon turn out that maybe, just maybe, possibly,
Hongjoong can sometimes be too tired to give you the attention you both craved
You were lying under him, one hand tangled in his hair and the other gripping at his back, pulling him into a deep kiss as he thrusted into you
And although Hongjoong was loving every second of his current situation, after a few minutes, he could quickly feel the stiffness and fatigue from his work creeping up on him again
He tried to accommodate to each of your commands, going at whatever pace you desired
But as time went on, the tension in his thighs started to hurt, until it eventually became too much to keep up properly
He could feel his arms starting to give out as well, making it even harder for him to hold his balance above you
So, when you moaned out another “faster” to him, Hongjoong stilled instead, dropping his head to your chest as he caught his breath
“Joongie...?” You softly called out to him, watching your boyfriend’s hunched-over form with a worried frown
You moved your hand up to fix his sweaty, messy hair before lightly grabbing his face to make him look at you, “you okay?”
Hongjoong let out a small, sheepish chuckle at the question and sluggishly sat back up again
“Of course, don’t worry,” he began, letting one of his fingers trace shapes against your thigh absentmindedly, “there’s just this...slight issue.”
You raised your eyebrows at that, trying to suppress any nervousness rising within you at the cryptic comment
“Which is...?” You questioned, trying to get him to elaborate
“Which is that I might actually be too tired in the end like you said,” Hongjoong admitted with a chuckle, though you could tell he was embarrassed by the blush spreading all the way down his neck, “sorry.”
You let out a chuckle of your own at his words, finding his flustered expression utterly adorable, “okay, and?”
"Huh? Well, uh, that’s it,” Hongjoong replied, confused by your question
Moving to sit up as well (or at least as much as you could, given your current position), you gave Hongjoong a small, understanding smile
“Then what are you apologizing for, baby? It’s okay. You’ve been working so hard lately I was surprised you were even still up to do it tonight.”
Hongjoong smiled bashfully at your words, once again being reminded of how foolish he was to feel embarrassed about this with you
Taking his shy silence as your cue to continue, you spoke again: “Do you want me to get on top then?”
Moving off of you, Hongjoong nodded sheepishly, “if you’d be so kind.”
You laughed at his awkwardly formal words of appreciation, sitting up to move into his lap, “why are you so polite all of a sudden? You’re acting like this is the first time I’ve been on top.”
Hongjoong’s blush seemed to get even deeper at that, one of his hands coming up to hide his red face
“I don’t know, okay? I guess I just wanted to treat you after being gone for so long, but it turns out I can’t even do that now,” he whined, the pout on his lips audible even with his face covered
Your eyebrows furrowed at his self-deprecation, gently pulling his hand away from his face to look at him sternly
“Hey now, don’t say that,” you chastised him, making his own expression soften, “I’m not the only one here who needs love and care, am I now?”
Hongjoong conceded with a small shake of his head, casting his eyes down
“Exactly. There’s no need to push yourself when I’m perfectly fine and happy to take care of you instead. Got it?”
Hongjoong smiled softly at your words, moving his hands to interlace them with yours, “got it.”
Leaning down, you pressed a loving kiss to his lips before straightening back up with a warm smile, “good.”
“And now, let’s show my boyfriend how it’s done, hm?”
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Seonghwa
“Ah,” you whined, feeling your thighs tremble for the nth time, “Seonghwa-”
Seonghwa just grinned, meeting your eyes as he looked up at you from between your legs, gripping your thighs even tighter to hold them in place
You’d had a long day today, coming home from work absolutely exhausted
Which didn’t exactly match the energy of your boyfriend, who was elated after an unusually fun and smooth day
He’d hoped to celebrate it with you, but upon seeing how tired you were, he knew that a nice, peaceful evening would suit you a lot better
And so he did everything he could to make you relax, focusing on you and you only for the rest of the night
From cooking your favorite dish for dinner and letting you vent about everything that had happened to you today, to giving you an amazing massage on the couch, to then gently scooping you up into his arms and bringing you into your bedroom to let you relax in a slightly different way
Which is how you ended up like this - lying in the middle of your bed with your bottom half completely naked, legs spread just enough to allow Seonghwa between them while he ate you out like a man starved
You could tell how hard he was trying to make you come, doing everything perfectly to a T, just as you’d taught him over the course of your relationship
So, to say you were feeling incredible would be a big understatement
You could practically feel all of the stress within you melting away with each movement of his tongue, letting you forget all the bad events from today
And it’s not like you were trying to hide your pleasure either, if the way you tugged at his hair while his name breathlessly fell from your lips was anything to go by
But as the minutes passed by and you were still teetering right before the edge of your orgasm, you knew it wasn’t enough for you
Or, rather, that there wasn’t anything for you to get past that edge right now
Because normally, if Seonghwa pulled on you what he was just doing, you’d be coming within a few minutes without a miss
But now, as the imaginary timer neared 20 minutes and you were still stuck in that same spot, you knew you’d have to call it a day
Unfortunately for you, it seemed as though Seonghwa misunderstood you, brushing your whines of his name off as just another sign you were feeling good (all thanks to him, of course)
And so, you had to try again, being a bit more pointed with your voice this time
“Seonghwa, please,” you spoke again, using the fingers tangled in his hair to gently tug him away from you
“Yes, honey?” He asked in a sweet, teasing voice, panting as he finally parted from your core after what felt like ages
“I, um, I think we should...” you trailed off, unsure of how to phrase your troubles without hurting your boyfriend
“Yes? What is it?” Seonghwa spurred you on, giving you a genuine, warm smile this time
“Ah, it’s- it’s nothing, really,” you began again, trying your best to focus as his thumbs softly brushed the insides of your thighs, “I was just thinking that, maybe, we should stop for tonight?”
The second you finished your sentence, you could see the smile on Seonghwa’s face drop, replaced by a look of concern instead
“What? Why?” He asked in a quiet, confused voice, eyebrows furrowing as he looked up at you, “did I do something wrong?”
You panicked at the sudden sadness in his voice, seeing you’d managed to do exactly what you were trying to avoid doing - hurting the man’s feelings
“No!” You blurted out, getting up on your elbows to face him better, “no, you did nothing wrong, not at all, just- come here.”
You beckoned him over to you, to which he quickly obliged, crawling from between your legs to lay down by your side
You turned onto your side as well to face him again, noticing the small, hopeful sparkle in his eyes as he watched you nervously
Unable to stop yourself, you leaned in to steal a short, chaste kiss, catching him off-guard just enough to distract him from his worries before pulling away
“You didn’t do anything wrong, okay?” You repeated your words from before, reaching out with your hand to caress his cheek, brushing the skin with your thumb affectionately
“If anything, you were really good, actually,” you uttered, feeling your face warm at the admission, especially when you noticed the small smile on Seonghwa’s lips as a reaction
“It’s just that I don’t...I don’t think I can, well, come, tonight,” you finished, finally expressing what you were feeling properly
Seonghwa let out a quiet hum at that, letting the information settle in his head as a small, adorable pout subconsciously settled on his lips
“I see...” he began, before meeting your gaze once more, “but why do you think that is? Is it because you’re so tired from work or...?”
“Yeah, I think so,” you agreed, mirroring the pout on his lips without realizing, “I just feel like the stress is preventing me from being able to let go completely, you know?”
Seonghwa hummed in understanding, finally comforted enough to reach out and rest his hand on you as well, bringing you closer to him
“Oh well, if eating my girlfriend out isn’t going to help her destress, is there anything else I can do to make her relax?” He suddenly asked, giving you a confident smirk
Your mouth opened in shock, surprised by his sudden bluntness, “okay, first of all, how crude of you to say that,” you retorted sharply, lightly shoving him away in faux annoyance
He just chuckled, amused by your reaction as he let you continue
“But yes, there is something,” you admitted, watching as he perked up at your words
“And what would that be?” He urged on, looking at you expectantly
“Well, it’s not exactly as exciting as ‘eating your girlfriend out’“, you explained in false dejection, looking apologetically at Seonghwa, whose turn it was to blush now, not expecting you to use the same choice of words against him so suddenly
“B-but?” He asked, noting the glint of mischief in your eyes as you silently got your petty revenge on him
“But do you think we could take a shower together?” You requested, giving him your best puppy eyes, “I’m just feeling way too tired and cuddly right now to do it alone.”
Seonghwa just smiled at that, finding your wish utterly adorable
Reaching forward again to grab your waist, he gently pulled you on top of him
“Of course we can,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of your head before sitting up, still cradling you in his arms
Carefully, he moved to stand up from the bed, holding you comfortably as he began walking over to the bathroom
“Just let me take care of you, okay?”
“Okay.”
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Yunho
It was quite late already, the clock on Yunho’s nightstand nearing 9 PM
Glancing over at it, he quietly sighed to himself, turning another page of the book he was currently reading
Today was one of the few rare days when you would come home a lot later than him, switching the usual dynamic you two had going on
At first, he didn’t see it as a big deal, killing time by playing games, watching TV, cooking, eating, you name it
But as the hours dragged on, he was steadily growing more and more lonely, longing for your voice, touch, and just company in general
At last, he had found himself in your shared bedroom, picking up a random book to read through out of sheer boredom
It felt as though nothing interested him anymore, not when you weren’t there to join him and hang out together
Zoning out and looking away from the pages before him, he suddenly began wondering just how the hell you managed to do this every time he was the one to come home late like this
The thoughts of you moping about just like him every time you were alone in your apartment for too long made a small pout appear on his face, suddenly getting too sappy and emotional for his liking
Luckily for him, before he could get any softer, the door to your bedroom suddenly opened, revealing your tired, yet oddly happy form
Yunho’s eyes widened in surprise, having been too distracted by his own thoughts to hear the front door opening and closing
He immediately sat up in his spot, not even bothering to mark where he’d left off in the book before setting it aside with a bright, adoring smile
“Hi!” He greeted you warmly, watching you approach the bed with a playful grin
“Hey there, honey,” you replied, pulling the thick sweater you were wearing over your head as you walked over to him, “how have you been?”
“Oh, I was so bored without you, you wouldn’t believe it,” he sighed out a small chuckle, the happy smile never leaving his face as he spoke
“Is that so?” You questioned absentmindedly, too focused on undoing your pants to pay him your full attention
Yunho began shuffling over to the side, wanting to get up to welcome you properly, but you quickly stopped him with a hand on his chest, making him look up at you in confusion
“Now, now,” you chided softly, looking down at your boyfriend with eager, lidded eyes, “no need to get up just yet. There’s something I want us to do first.”
Finally noticing the sultry tone of your voice and the way your eyes roamed all over his body, Yunho took the hint, a small blush rising to his cheeks
“N-now? Are you sure?” He inquired surprisedly, though not stopping you from pushing him down on the bed, watching as you quickly discarded your pants before straddling him on the bed
“Mhm,” you hummed in agreement, letting your hands wander all over his broad chest while looking up to gauge his reaction, “been thinking about doing this all day, actually.”
The sudden brazen confession took Yunho off-guard, the blush on his face deepening as he felt his own pants tighten
You let one of your hands slip under his clothes, fingers splaying across his stomach as the other hand gently grabbed at his hair, making Yunho whine
“What do you say, hm? Wanna make up for all that time apart today?”
You never got a proper reply to your question, as the next thing you knew was Yunho planting his lips on yours, feverishly kissing you as he held you close
Sooner or later, the two of you moved to the middle of the bed, giving you all the necessary space to continue
Yunho had made no attempt to take over, enjoying the view of you on top of him far too much to put up any fight
It’s not like you minded either - very much the opposite, in fact, as you watched your boyfriend gradually lose himself to the pleasure, resting an arm over his eyes as he panted loudly
You were starting to get out of breath yourself, but for an entirely different reason;
As much as you loved being on top like this, the position proved to be far too much to do for someone who had just come back from a grueling day of tireless work
And so, after a few more minutes, you slowly came to a halt, hands resting on Yunho’s chest as you tried to catch your breath
Pulling his arm away, Yunho looked at you confusedly at first, before an amused grin made its way onto his lips
“Tired?” He asked, and though there was a teasing edge to his tone, you knew he was just being playful and caring
“Yeah,” you sighed, a small smile of your own gracing your lips at the way his eyes sparkled when he looked up at you
“Want me to help?” He continued, to which you only let out a tired, agreeing hum
Without any further ado, Yunho shifted his legs on the bed to get more leverage, grabbing your hips carefully but firmly before starting to move for you from below
The sudden change of pace and angle made you whine loudly, propping your hands next to Yunho on the mattress to support yourself
Closing your eyes, you slouched over Yunho, mind empty as he lightly jostled you on top of him with his thrusts
You were positively blanking out at this point, only able to focus on the almost delirium-inducing pleasure coursing through you
Slowly but surely, you could feel yourself getting closer and closer, and judging by the way Yunho’s thrusts became even more erratic, so was he
“Yunho, I’m-” you tried to speak up, only to interrupt yourself with a wanton moan as he managed to angle himself just right
The reaction from you made him smirk, the grip on your hips tightening as he tried to squeeze out the last bits of energy left to make you get over that imaginary edge
“It’s okay, babe, I’m about to- OW!”
The sudden cry made you instantly open your eyes, startling you out of your daze completely
You watched the pained expression on Yunho’s face, feeling confused and panicked at the same time
“A-are you okay?! What happened?” You asked worriedly, unsure whether you should get off him or not
"Ah, fuck, holy shit,” he hissed, sitting up as much as he could with you still on his lap, one hand staying on your waist to keep you stable while the other reached somewhere behind you
“What? What is it?” You questioned again, lightly resting your hands on his back to stabilize yourself, but not too hard in fear of potentially hurting him more
“I-I’m sorry,” Yunho began, pausing momentarily as his face scrunched up again in discomfort, “but I have the craziest leg cramp right now.”
It took you a second to process his words before you turned to look behind you, and sure enough, his hand was holding onto his calf, and you could see the muscle in his leg tensing
“Oh- oh!” You exclaimed, everything finally setting in, “I’m so sorry, let me get off-”
But before you could try to move, the hand on your waist rose up to your shoulder, gently pressing down to stop you from getting up
“No, no, it’s okay!” Yunho reassured you firmly, letting his forehead rest in the crook of your neck, “just- just wait a bit, it’s starting to go away now.”
You wordlessly obeyed, leaving the two of you to awkwardly sit on top of each other as Yunho tried to catch his breath
After a few moments, he finally pulled away with a deep breath, letting himself fall back down on the bed
“You good?” You asked, the concern in your voice making Yunho’s heart flutter
“Yeah,” he sighed, though you could still see the cogs in his head turning as he tried to process everything, “yeah, I am. Sorry about that.”
You chuckled at his apologetic words, making him look up at you curiously
“What are you apologizing for? You didn’t do anything wrong,” you consoled him tenderly, idly drawing invisible shapes on his chest with your finger as you spoke: “you were just being a good boyfriend and fucking your girlfriend into the next week like she’d asked you to.”
Yunho let out a heartfelt chuckle at your words, a precious, cheeky smile spreading over his lips, “yeah, I guess you’re right.”
You were about to say something, but then a surprised yelp left your lips as you were suddenly being flipped around, Yunho now hovering over you with that giddy, playful look in his eyes that you adored so much as he spoke:
“And I’m about to do it again.”
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Yeosang
You heard the front door open and close, followed by a series of heavy footsteps and panting echoing down the hallway
Turning your head away from the TV, you watched as Yeosang made his way over to you, barely keeping himself upright with the heavy duffel bag over his shoulder
Quickly springing to your feet, you ran over to him, helping him take the big bag off his sweat-drenched shoulders
“Hun, are you okay?” You asked worriedly, cringing at the loud thud of the dumbbells inside the bag hitting the ground
There was a moment of silence as Yeosang desperately tried to catch his breath, holding a hand up weakly as a signal for you to wait a bit
“Leg day at the gym-” he paused again, taking another big breath before continuing, “almost missed the bus, then the elevator didn’t work and-”
“Baby, slow down,” you stopped him, letting out a small chuckle, “it’s okay, just take your time to calm down and then you can tell me everything, alright?”
Yeosang gave you a tired, dazed look, taking a while to process your words before finally resorting to a small, compliant nod
“Good,” you said, relieved to see your boyfriend’s breathing finally starting to even out, “now, is there anything I can do to help you?”
Yeosang shook his head at that, waving his hand dismissively before speaking again, “no thanks, ’m just-” another exhausted sigh left his lips, ”tired, sweaty, gross-” huffing again, he decided to just put it simply, not having enough energy to elaborate: ”shower.”
You giggled at that, amused by your boyfriend’s spastic thought processes, making Yeosang’s lips curve into a small smile as well
“Alright then, off you go,” you replied, giving Yeosang a light pat on the back to get him moving
And even though he did get going, you didn’t fail to notice how he tensed at your touch, face scrunching up softly in discomfort
You didn’t say anything, however, deciding to just let him go for now and deal with it later once he came back
Fortunately, you didn’t have to wait too long before the bathroom door opened again, revealing a tired, but seemingly content Yeosang
You watched (or stared, rather) as he stood in the doorway, swiftly tying a towel around his hips which left little to nothing to the imagination
Almost as if feeling your gaze on him, his eyes flitted up as well, meeting yours with a small, unassuming smile
He then made his way over to you on the couch, carefully sitting down next to you before looking at the TV curiously
“What are you watching?” He asked softly, resting his still slightly damp hair on your shoulder
You couldn’t help but chuckle, amazed at how innocent your boyfriend could get sometimes
Did he really not realize what he was doing to you by all this?
“Well, I was watching a Netflix show, but not anymore, damn,” you replied brazenly, not even bothering to hide the interest in your eyes as you ogled his exposed body
Yeosang lifted his head up from your shoulder, turning to you with a confused look on his face
Until he saw the way you were staring at him, that is
“Y-Y/N,” he stammered, feeling his cheeks heat up at the sudden feeling of exposure, hands fumbling in his lap
It was then that your gaze fell to his sculpted back, however, reminding you of your previous plans
“Oh, right! I almost forgot,” you suddenly exclaimed, standing up from the couch before lending your hand to Yeosang, “come with me.”
“Um, may I ask why?” He asked back, even more confused, but accepting your hand nevertheless
You helped him stand up, taking note of another wince washing over your boyfriend’s face before being quickly suppressed again, just like the last one
“You, sir,” you began, giving him a playful grin as you began leading him down the hallway, “are coming to the bedroom with me.”
Walking in the front, you didn’t get to see his reaction, and yet the surprised hitch of his breath told you more than enough
Without another word, Yeosang let you pull him into the bedroom, his free hand holding onto the slowly loosening towel
“Alright, lie down on your stomach for me,” you commanded, gesturing to the bed
Only then did Yeosang pause, giving you a puzzled look: “Wait, on my stomach? But...why? What exactly are you going to do to me?”
You only chuckled at the question, paying it no mind as you spoke again: “You’ll see soon enough. Now lie down for me, will you?”
Understanding he didn’t have much of a say in this, Yeosang sighed for what seemed like the thousandth time today (though this one was more out of being flustered than exhaustion), finally giving in and laying down the way you wanted
You watched on with a triumphant smile, waiting for him to get comfortable before climbing on the bed to straddle his hips
“Y/N, seriously, what are you-” Yeosang began once more, only to be cut off by his own groan as your hands started massaging his shoulders
You just giggled at his reaction, content with the effect your skilled fingers had on him
“What did you think I was gonna do to you, huh?” You teased, “look at you, jumping right to the dirty thoughts.”
Yeosang could only moan in reply, feeling the knots in his upper back slowly beginning to relax
“Ah- shut up. You’re lucky you’re so good at this, I don’t even have the energy to get mad at you right now,” Yeosang grumbled, words getting partially muffled by the pillow under his face
“Hm, you’re right,” you hummed in agreement, “and to think I’m giving you this incredible massage for free? That’s almost criminal, you know.”
Despite having his face buried in the pillows, you could still hear Yeosang’s faint chuckle, accompanied by a slight shake of his shoulders
“Is that so?” He asked, finally gathering the strength and willpower to lift his head up from the bed to speak more clearly, “is there a way I could repay you for such a generous service, then?”
You couldn’t help but smirk at the suggestive question, halting your massage in order to lean down, pressing your chest flush to his back as you spoke
“I think I have an idea, actually,” you said in a sultry whisper, making a shiver run down Yeosang’s spine
“A-ah, is that so?” He replied, though his voice was noticeably less stable than before, “and what, uh, what would that be?”
You grinned at the response, thinking he was getting weak for you already
Which, to Yeosang’s defense, he absolutely was, feeling his mind spin at the sudden seductiveness in your voice
It’s just that there was another thing making him nervous as well, maybe even more than the sudden shift in atmosphere
This thing, uh, how should he put it
He wasn’t getting hard
Like, at all
Even as your nails slowly raked down the expanse of his back, lightly scratching at his sides just the way that gave him goosebumps every time, his dick was just refusing to perform
He could feel the waves of anxiety washing over him, both from the confusion of what and how and why this was happening
As well as the horrifying realization that you were definitely going to notice he wasn’t hard whatsoever and what if you’re going to think he doesn’t find you attractive or doesn’t want to have sex with you and-
“Yeosang?”
The sudden, concerned call of his name caught him off-guard, effectively bringing him out of his quickly spiraling mind and making him turn around to look at you
“Y-yeah?” He asked back, failing to keep his composure in front of you, which only served to worry you further
“I just asked you to turn over for me but you weren’t responding,” you repeated, patting his hips gently, “are you okay?”
Silence filled the room as Yeosang stilled, unsure of what to say
“Hun?” You spoke again after a while, growing increasingly worried, “you know you can tell me anything, right? I won’t judge you or get mad, I promise.”
Yeosang only whined at your words, dropping his face back down into the pillows in a strange mix of guilt and frustration
You were about to say something again when you suddenly heard a quiet, muffled voice mumble something you couldn’t quite decipher
“Hm? What was that?” You asked again, getting off your boyfriend and sitting down next to him to hear him better, “I couldn’t hear you, sorry.”
“I said I can’t get hard,” Yeosang replied, a bit louder this time, face burning with humiliation
“Oh.”
The room fell silent once more as you processed the information, unknowingly making Yeosang’s stomach churn even more from the embarrassment of the situation
He couldn’t even look you in the eyes at that moment, honestly feeling like he was going to burst into tears if you didn’t say anything very soon
But, of course, you did
“It’s okay,” you suddenly spoke, voice surprisingly calm in contrast with Yeosang’s anxious expectations
Finally mustering up the courage to face you again, he lifted his head, looking at you hopefully, “really?”
You couldn’t help but giggle at the hopeful twinkle in his eyes, finding him way too adorable considering the current situation
“Um, yeah? Of course it’s fine,” you assured him, raising a hand to card through his hair gently, “this kind of stuff happens sometimes, it’s no big deal.”
Yeosang couldn’t believe what he was hearing, genuinely taken aback by how calm and understanding you were being just now
But the more he thought about it, the more it made sense
"Yeah,” he conceded at last, “I guess you’re right.”
You chuckled at the look of absolute concentration on his face, ruffling his hair a bit
“Obviously,” you replied confidently, “you’ve had a stressful day today, Yeo. Not to mention how exhausted you were just an hour ago when you came back home. Honestly, it probably would have been more surprising if you did still get it up after all that.”
Yeosang whined quietly at the bold expression (much to your amusement), but nevertheless, he agreed with your reasoning
“So you don’t feel disappointed by it or anything?” He hesitantly checked one last time, wanting to make sure you genuinely weren’t feeling hurt
“Of course I don’t, bub,” you replied, leaning down to softly peck the cute birthmark on his temple that you’d always adored
“Besides, we can always try again later anyway,” you continued, offering him a warm smile, which he shyly returned as well
“Okay,” he replied quietly, feeling his eyelids growing heavier by the second, the stress and exhaustion of today finally beginning to catch up with him
Not missing the little faces of pain from before, you were definitely able to notice how drowsy Yeosang was getting now, words slowly beginning to slur more and more with each response
“Someone’s getting sleepy, huh?” You whispered with a grin, to which Yeosang could only nod weakly, feeling himself drifting off
“Alright then, let’s get you cozy, shall we?” You asked quietly, not even expecting a reply at this point from your half-asleep boyfriend
Sitting back up slowly, you carefully untied and removed the towel off Yeosang’s body, throwing it off the bed before draping the blankets over you both
As you lay back down, you noticed that Yeosang was still trying to stay awake, watching you with tired eyes and a small smile
“Goodnight,” he whispered, reaching over to hold your hand under the covers
You couldn’t help but smile at the sweet gesture, leaning forward to kiss your boyfriend’s lips one more time
“Goodnight.”
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Thank you for reading! And remember, feedback is always appreciated! ♥  
2K notes · View notes
springtyme · 7 months
Note
Hi, I'm so excited your requests are open! I love the way you describe scenes, you take the reader around the full area to understand how the setting affects the emotions of the story so beautifully (thinking of your Simon piece, Homeward Bound, especially).
I'd like to put in a request for Sydney Adamu x reader (gn afab is fine!), something very tender and intimate. I'm imagining an established relationship that's still very new, like maybe they're sharing a night routine for the first time, or on a date at a garden/museum?
Craving something v sweet with a bit of "healthy tension" lol, maybe a little soft smut if you are up to it! Thank you so much for sharing your work, if you don't feel like writing this no worries!
𝐀 𝐒𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 ♡
Thank you so much dear! I love scene setting so hearing that you enjoy it makes me so happy! <3 I had so much fun with this Syd piece (seriously, I love her so much!) so thank you so much for this request, I hope you like it :)
Sydney Adamu x afab!Reader || Masterlist || Sydney playlist
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summary: You and Syd are about to spend your first weekend together. Dinner is being eaten and so is something else.
word count: 3.7k
warnigs: Smut! (18+, mdni!) Food. Fluffy smut, cunnilingus/face-riding, vaginal fingering, nipple play/sucking. Reader is afab but there is used no gendering terms. I'm sorry if there is mistakes or anything seems rushed, I wrote this in one sitting and I haven't had time to proofread yet.
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As you step onto the crowded L train, the familiar sounds of the city surround you. The rumbling of the train, the chatter of fellow passengers, and the occasional screech of brakes fill the air. You find a seat by the window, your packed weekend bag in your lap as you gaze out at the passing cityscape with a mix of excitement and anticipation. 
The weekend ahead holds something special for you – it is the first time you’ll be spending it entirely with Syd, just the two of you. Sydney finally has a whole weekend without any restaurant related obligations which just happens to align with the week her father is out of town and as the train glides through the city, you can’t help but think about how happy you are to have her in your life. 
The two of you had met on a cold afternoon in late February. Little frost crystals had formed at the outside of the windows of the little café you were seated inside of. You had come there to get some work done, your small studio apartment didn’t really allow your creativity to flow and you had hoped that a change in scenery would help you, but without any luck. You had instead ended up staring out of the window at the freezing Chicago. Your laptop closed shut as you sat inside the little warm cocoon that was Kasama, feeling small and alone as you looked out on the outside world of Chicago. You had, at some point, looked up and there she was, Sydney, seated at the other side of the café already looking at you. That’s how it all had started. The two of you had started talking, which then had led to Syd inviting you to join her on a culinary journey across Chicago after she told you that her friend and business partner wouldn’t be able to join her, which otherwise had been the plan. 
You can’t help but smile  as you think back on that day and as the train nears your destination, your smile only grows wider. You walk the short distance to Sydney’s apartment building, your heart beating a little faster with each step. You just can’t wait to see her, she has, in the short amount of time you have known her, become very special to you. 
You press the buzzer, hearing the faint sound of Sydney’s voice through the intercom. “Come on up,” she says, her voice filled with warmth and excitement. With a smile on your face, you step into the elevator, your heart pounding in anticipation. As the elevator doors open on Sydney’s floor, you take a moment to compose yourself. You want everything to be perfect, to show her just how much this weekend means to you. You knock on the door, and when it swings open, you’re greeted by Sydney, clad in a comfy sweater, looking gorgeous as always.
“Hi,” she greets you, her eyes sparkling with joy and a gentle smile tugging at her lips. 
In that moment, all your worries and nerves melt away. You step into the apartment, right into Syd’s outstretched arms, feeling an overwhelming sense of ease fall over you.
“Hi,” you answer her, enjoying the feeling of her arms around you, as she hugs you tightly. You tow off your shoes and shed your coat which Sydney takes from you to hang up for you before taking your hand in hers, leading you into the apartment.
As you find yourself in the kitchen, Syd kindly takes your bag, and tells you to sit down while she puts your bag into her bedroom. The warm, inviting aroma of simmering spices fills your nostrils  and you can’t help but smile at Sydney’s culinary prowess. The soft glow of the day’s last sunlight filters through the curtains, casting a comforting glow upon the apartment, adorning everything with a soft golden hue.  
“Whatcha cookin’?” You ask, loud enough for her to hear in the other room.  
“Butternut squash soup with a hint of cinnamon and nutmeg as an appetizer. And for the main course, we’re having rosemary roasted chicken with a maple glaze and caramelized Brussels sprouts.”
“Wow, that sounds amazing, smells delicious too. Are you sure you don’t need any help?” You ask from your seat at the kitchen island. 
“Nah, I’m good, and I’m almost done anyway, I’ve wanted to try this recipe out anyway,” she tells you, like cooking the enormous amount of food was nothing. “You can help with the dishes after though,” she adds with a cheeky smile on her face as she reenters the kitchen. 
“Well, that, I surely can. I might also just be more in the way than any help with the food,” you say with a light laugh.
It’s not that you’re bad in a kitchen, but you are nowhere near Sydney’s level and even though a part of you feels incredibly guilty for not helping you can’t deny how much you love watching her work. Completely in her element. So you let her do her thing and stay put . Nimble fingers dancing across the pots and pans, her brows knitted with focus as she begins to compose the meal, orchestrating a symphony of flavors. “No, you wouldn’t be in the way, that’s not what I meant, I just want to cook for you… It’s like the thing I know how to do, and…” she trails off for a second, eyes staring down at the food before continuing. “I love cooking for the people that are special to me, I guess you could say that it is my ‘love language’ or whatever.” 
She does air quotes at ‘love language, but you can’t help but smile at her words. You feel incredibly lucky as you watch her work her culinary magic, especially after what she just said. The way she moves with such grace and confidence in the kitchen is truly mesmerizing. As the mouthwatering aroma of the cooking food fills the room, you find yourself captivated by her artistry, her words really tugging at your heartstrings. 
You understand her desire to cook for you, to express her love through her culinary creations. You reach out and gently take her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
“I know,” you say softly, your voice filled with warmth and appreciation. “It’s one of the things I admire the most about you, you know… It’s not just about the food, it is about the care and thought you put into it. It really is something special Syd. The way you care… It’s really admirable.”
Her eyes soften, a small smile playing on her lips. “You know what?” she says, her voice filled with gratitude. “Having someone to cook for means the world to me. So, thank you for wanting to eat my food, just having you sit there is actually a great help, it helps remind me why I love cooking.” She lets out with a warm laugh, but the sincerity of her words aren’t lost in the slightest by it. 
So you stay put. The sizzle of vegetables hitting the hot oil and the occasional clatter of utensils against the countertops create a rhythmic melody that fills the room. And so, you continue to sit at the kitchen island, watching Sydney work her culinary magic.
You watch as she gracefully garnishes the soup with a sprinkle of fresh herbs, roasted pumpkin seeds and pieces of finely sliced chili, transforming the dish into a culinary masterpiece. The delicious smell of the dish wafts through the air, teasing your senses and making your mouth water in anticipation. 
Finally, Sydney places a steaming bowl of soup in front of you. The vibrant colors and rich aroma enticing you.“Well, bon appétit,” she says, during a little hand gesture towards the bowl, an almost shy smile on her lips but her eyes gleam with excitement as she sits down at the other side of the table with a bowl of her own.
As you take your first spoonful, the velvety texture and warm spices dance on your tongue, filling you with a comforting sensation. You savor each bite, cherishing the meal Syd  has cooked with so much care and love. 
The two of you eat and talk and laugh and after the meal you do the dishes together, the jokes and banter flow freely, and occasionally a blob of soap sud will playfully be flickered at the other, turning the usually so mundane task into a delightful ordeal, the clinking of dishes becomes the applause for your comedic genius.
With the dishes done and the kitchen cleaned up, you both find yourselves in the cozy living room, contemplating what to do next. Sydney suggests watching a movie, and the idea immediately sparks your interest.
“Sounds good,” you say, a smile forming on your lips. “Anything in mind?”
Sydney thinks for a moment, her eyes scanning the shelves of DVDs. She has told you about her father’s love of physical media, which has led to a sumptuous collection of movies, music and books filling out multiple floor to ceiling shelves of the apartment. “How about a rom com? I could do with something light and heartwarming.”
You nod in agreement, appreciating the idea of a feel-good movie to complement the warmth and happiness you already feel being in Sydney’s presence. Together, you browse through the collection, but you don’t really find anything that peaks any of your interests. Finally she turns to you when it is clear between you that maybe a movie wasn’t the right call after all, something about the idea of having to look at a screen instead of each other suddenly feeling immensely silly to both of you. 
“We could also just sit for a little while,” she says, a lovesick gleam in her eyes. 
You smile at the suggestion and feel your heart flutter at the adoration in her eyes. The idea of simply enjoying each other’s company without any distractions sounds perfect. “I like that idea,” you reply, your voice filled with affection. 
She redirects her attention from movies to the record collection, pulling one out from the shelves. Shedding the vinyl from its sleeve before delicately lifting the lid of the beautiful vintage record player. Placing the album onto the turntable, handling it with utmost care, gently lowering the needle onto the vinyl. The smooth sound of the Delfonics filling the room, as they start to croon for you. 
You settle onto the soft couch, leaning against each other as you both take a moment to soak in the tranquility of the room. With the sun now fully set the only source of light in the room comes from a single table lamp and the candles which Syd had deliberately lit for the two of you, their warm glow casts flickering shadows across the walls, creating an ambiance of cozy intimacy. 
You lean your head on Sydney’s shoulder, feeling the warmth and security of her presence as your body’s intertwine. The silence between you is comfortable, filled with a deep sense of understanding and acceptance. As you sit there, Sydney’s hand finds its way into yours, your fingers lacing together. The gentle touch sends a wave of comfort and contentment through your body, and you can’t help but feel grateful.
Without needing words, you understand each other’s thoughts and emotions, and it feels like time stands still. In this moment, the world outside seems to fade away, leaving only the two of you in this bubble of love and tranquility. It’s as if nothing else matters except for the connection you share and the giddy happiness that comes with new love. 
“God, I’m so glad Carmy was being a little bitch and ditched me that day at Kasama,” Syd lets out a breathy giggles, shaking her head gently as she finally breaks the silence.
You lift your head, your eyes finding hers. “Me too,” you say, a soft smile tugging at the corner of your lips. 
“Yeah?” She grins down at you. 
“Yeah,” you nod, a grin of your own now plastered on your face. 
In fact the word ‘glad’ doesn’t even come close to how you feel about it, the word seems way too weak to hold all the feelings you have on the topic. Grateful, ecstatic, completely and utterly over the fucking moon, those are words that might be a little closer to describe how you actually feel about it. But you don’t say that, not yet. It’s not that long since that fateful afternoon when you and Syd had first met, and even less time has passed since the two of you got your shit together and actually confessed your feelings towards each other. One day, you’ll tell her just how incredibly happy you are that Carmen decided to be ‘a little bitch’, to use her own words, which led to you and Syd meeting. 
“You think Hallmark sells ‘thank you for being such a little bitch’ cards?” Syd giggles. You know that, despite her choice of words, she actually cares a lot about Carmy. Her and her coworkers are basically family, maybe sometimes a bit dysfunctional, but nonetheless one that does care deeply for one another. Syd had, apparently, stabbed Richie in the ass one time, which they seem to have reconciled nicely from, and somehow only has made Syd all the more attractive to you. 
“I don’t think so, but I can get you some paper and crayons if you wanna get crafty,” 
Her warm, affectionate laughter fills the room while ‘If I ever saw a girl that I needed in this world you are the one for me’  is sung from the speakers and you can’t do anything but agree with the statement. You snuggle a little closer into her and she does the same. The two of you have become completely entangled by now.  
“I love moments like these,” she whispers, her voice filled with affection.
“Yeah, me too,” you reply with a soft sigh.
She dips her head down as you lean up, and your lips meet. What starts out as a slow and gentle kiss soon turns more heated. The two of you move in sync, changing the position on the couch, with Syd now lying beneath you, her back pressed down into the soft cushions, with you  hovering over her, maintaining the kiss without breaking it even once. And you continue until your lungs are burning and you have to stop to catch your breath again. The both of you panting heavily as you break apart but you don’t take long before you again plant your lips on her, this time kissing down her jaw and neck. You feel how she squirms under you, little muffled whines escaping from her closed lips as she grows more desperate for you.
“You’re so beautiful,” you whisper into her skin, your voice filled with admiration. You lift your head again, your eyes finding hers . “Can.. Can I take these off?” Your voice laced with a little shyness as you ask her, your fingers ghost over the hem of her pants. But your shyness disappears when she nods with eagerness, pulling off her sweater as you start to undo her pants which she is quick to kick off, leaving her in only her panties and bra. You take a second to take in the view of her all spread out on the couch for you and you can’t believe how lucky you are to have met her, let alone that she reciprocates your feelings. 
“You’re so gorgeous,” you sigh with admiration, dipping your head down again, this time planting a trail of kisses down from her collarbone towards the vale between her breasts, continuing down her stomach until you get to the band of her underwear. 
“You want me to take these off too?” you ask, looking up at her, through heavy lids, your heart beating loudly in your ears. You and Syd have been taking things slow, the two of you never have been this intimate before, but it feels so right in the moment and the sweet sounds she is making for you only makes your need to taste her even greater. Your eyes lock, she moves her hand down towards you, sweetly cupping your cheek, stroking the pad of her thumb gently over your cheekbone before nodding. “Please, do,” she almost pleads.           
You keep eye contact as you get into a better position. Your fingers tug at her panties as you start to slowly glide them down her legs. As the garment has left her body, Sydney spreads her legs wider for you, offering you a better view of herself, her pussy already dripping from eagerness.         
“God, you’re so gorgeous,” you purr before lowering your head, kissing up her thighs until you reach her glistening cunt. Burying your face between her legs you flatten your tongue against her entrance, sliding your tongue through her wet folds, a warm shiver running through you as you taste her for the first time. You hum into her, loving the way she tastes and feels against your tongue, lapping into her, flicking your tongue against her clit, making her whine out with pleasure which just makes you even more eager to hear more from her.      
“Fuck, right there! Right, fucking, there…” she pants out as you work your tongue a little harder against her.
She bucks her hips upwards, gently pressing her mound against your face. This makes you hum into her pussy again as you feel a warm rush run down your spine by the firm feeling of her against your mouth, which makes her let out a breathy moan from the vibration. Your hands find her hips. Tender fingers, softly digging into her skin as you help her find a rhythm as she starts to gently grind into your mouth.   
Her moans grow louder and higher in pitch, which only makes you move your tongue with even more determination and her body starts to tremble. You move your lips, beginning to slowly suck at her clit as she comes closer and closer to her release. You let your thumb take over the work on her sensitive clit, circling it gently as you start to lick into her again. 
“I-I’m… I’m so close,” she whines out, making you hum into her again, letting her know that you don’t have any intention to stop. You feel how her walls tighten around your tongue, as she starts to cry out in pleasure, sensing how her muscles relax as she starts to come undone on your tongue. You keep going, keep lapping into her, keep fucking her with your tongue as she rides out her climax, and you have never tasted anything sweeter. 
You finally detach your mouth from her entrance, your chin and lips glistening with a mix of her arousal and your own saliva, your eyes blown wide, feeling light, almost drunk from her juices. 
“Come here,” Syd whispers, her pupils dilated, making her already dark eyes look like two glistening forest lakes at night. She is so beautiful, you almost can’t take it. A sweet, gleeful smile on her face as she pulls you up to her again, pulling you into a sweet kiss, the taste of her still on your lips. 
Her hands sneak under your shirt, palming your warm skin underneath before pushing the cotton up your body, prompting you to shred the garment like she had with hers just before. You break the kiss, only for long enough so that you can pull it over your head, flinging it on the ground before connecting your lips again. Her hands find your exposed chest, gently kneading at the soft skin before she ends the kiss, moving her head down, taking your right nipple into her mouth, swirling her tongue around it before starting to gently suck it into her mouth. Her hand starts playing with your left nipple. 
You let out a series of soft moans as she works so tenderly on your tits. She lets go of your nipple with a soft ‘pop’ before moving on to your left breast, taking the other into her mouth. Her now free right hand starts to travel down to your entrance, sneaking it into the hem of your pants and down your underwear. 
She slowly slides a finger through your folds before beginning to tease your clit with slow firm circles. You gasp out from the sensation, your body feeling lighter and lighter. after a while she moves her hand, slowly gliding first one, then two, fingers inside of you, stating to slowly fuck you with her fingers. The wet squelching sound of her fingers pumping into you now rings in your ears. 
She keeps going and when she curls her fingers at just the right angle you feel how the last string snaps, falling over the edge. Your eyes roll back in your skull and your toes curl as your climax washes over you in electric hot rushes. You tap her shoulder, making Syd release your nipple so she can kiss your lips instead. She kisses you through your climax, turning you into putty in her hands.      
“That was nice…” She pants when the two of you finally brak apart, a lovesick smile on her face. 
“Yeah… very nice,” you agree, wit a smile mirroring hers. “Should we go get cleaned up?” 
“Yeah, we should, but let’s just stay here for a little while first,” she replies, a tired but blissful smile painting her lips.
So you do. You both lay there, breathing heavily, bodies intertwined, basking in the afterglow of the moment. The room is filled with a mix of warmth, desire, and a fulfilling sense of contentment. Time seems to stand still as you cherish the intimate connection you’ve just shared.
The world outside this moment seems distant and unimportant. All that matters is the warmth of Syd’s body against yours, the rhythm of your heartbeats synchronizing, and the blissful intimacy you’ve found in each other’s arms. The silence between you is comfortable, filled with unspoken words and a profound understanding of the depth of your connection.
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bunniesanddeer · 2 months
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I really really LOVE the Touch chapters with Alastor. You write it so well! Although you have a fic on touch now already I was wondering if I could request something similar?
Persoanlly I think I'd be a really affectionate and touchy person but I simply cannot initiate touch without knowing where to touch, how long, how much pressure and so on. And asking people before hand makes them really confused and tbh I hate having to explain myself and sound needy about it. Idk if it's just me having some weird thing going on.
Anyways, would you consider writing Al with a reader that just got to the hotel and is very straight forward with people about their fear of initiating physical contact during times where reader knows someone would appreciate a hug or pat or any kind of physical contact but reader can't give it them before clearing just how hey want the touch to be.
So Alastor notices that reader acts very affectionate in moments with people who initiate touch (cuddles with Angel on the couch, does Charlie's hair). But at the same time he notices that they shy away and sometimes flinch away when reader touches someone by accident (handing someone something and their hands brush, etc) and apologizes as if they had just burned them.
He goes to figure out why that is and kind of challenges reader to touch him (after him consenting of course) whenever because the struggle and fear amuses him plenty but somewhere deep down he wants them to grow comfortable and confident since that is how their personality is over all and it suits them way better than the cowardly insecure overthinking reader who is too scared to ask for a hug on an especially bad day, even when it could literally save their afterlife.
Just fluff and more physical affection and soft Alastor
You don't have to though! We have already been blessed with some amazing works by you
Would appreciate it to the moon and back if you would take this request (or add another part to your Touch chapters because I am a girl OBSSESSED and starved, hungry for more lol)
Thank you sooooo much for reading and I hope you have a lovely weekend!!!!! <3
Hi! I hope this is something like what you wanted? I had fun writing this. Sorry it took me a little while, haha.
Challenge
Pairing: Alastor x Reader
Tags: Fluff, touch sensitive reader/Alastor, slightest tinge of angst
Word Count: 2,839
When you had come to the hotel, Alastor was sure you weren’t going to last long. You avoided eye-contact with others, and your hands constantly fidgeted. You shifted on your feet, and rocked back on your heels constantly. Even when standing in one place, you couldn’t seem to be still. You seemed shifty, and he was sure you would pull something, and he would have to remove you. Alas, he was wrong. You stuck around, even if your weird tendencies only got weirder.
In the several weeks you had been residing in the hotel, not once had you initiated contact with anyone, not that he had seen. Alastor was sure you didn’t like it, until he saw Angel pick you up like a stuffed animal, and make you cuddle with him while watching the television. You had melted into the embrace, nuzzling against the soft fur of Angel’s upper shoulders. So Alastor needed to keep watching, and come up with a new explanation for your behavior.
At some point, Charlie had begged to ‘play’ with your long hair, so the two of you ended up dragging everyone into the sitting room for an impromptu ‘spa’ day. Charlie sat behind you, you were nearly in her lap, braiding one section of hair, and Vaggie was painting your claws. Angel was brushing out Husker’s fur. Niffty and Sir Pentious were talking and looking at the make up laid out across the coffee table. Alastor merely watched, amused by the group's antics every once in a while. 
He watched the way your eyes fluttered when you were embraced by the girls, and the way you seemed so at ease. Nothing seemed particularly amiss. He wondered if you hadn’t been comfortable yet, and had nearly settled with that. That was, until Angel came home, nearly in tears, one day.
“Fuck!” Angel yelled, tossing his phone harshly. It was rare for Angel Dust to have such an outward burst of anger. He always put on a show of being satisfied with his work, even when he clearly wasn’t. When Angel had settled on one of the couches, his face collapsed into his hands. “I’m so fucking tired of Val…”
Angel mumbled to himself as you entered the lobby. You glanced at Angel, and then his shattered phone. You frowned, your soft features looking nearly angry, and then picked up his phone, and made your way to him. Alastor watched from the bar, interested to see how this interaction went.
“Hey, Angie. I uh, I got your phone,” you said quietly. You sat off to the side of the couch, looking out of place, and uncomfortable. 
Angel mumbled something back, and your frown grew more severe. “I uh,” your voice trailed off, and your eyes started darting around. “Do you - do you want, like, a hug? I don’t really know what you need right now, I’m sorry.”
Alastor watches as Angel turns his head and whispers something to you. He doesn’t seem confused, not like Alastor is. He is clearly missing something. His eyes narrow, and he watches as you crawl up on the couch and awkwardly settle yourself against Angel’s side. 
How bizarre! How could you possibly not know what he needed? You were a very empathetic person, always looking out for others, and you liked being held, clearly, so how would you lack this kind of knowledge.
Alastor decides to confront you about it, at a later time. He needed to know everything about this. Perhaps it would be useful!
The next day, Alastor decides to try and get you to touch him, and then go from there. (It had been a little while since he had decided to ‘wing’ something like this. How exciting! You weren’t a bore at all!) His best bet would be to invite you to assist him for the day, so he invites you to when you’re heading down the stairs that morning.
“Ah! Just the woman I was looking for! How are you this morning, dearest?” He settles his hand on the banister, near where yours is resting, and waits.
“Oh! Good morning Alastor. I’m doing okay. What is it you needed me for?” Your smile is gentle and your demeanor open, even if you can’t keep eye-contact. 
“I was wondering if you would like to assist me today? We haven’t had much ‘bonding’ time as you and the others! I was hoping to rectify that,” he responds. He keeps his normal flair and watches you giggle at him.
“Of course, Al. It’s not like I had much going on today.” You pull back from the banister and twist to look at him better. “What do you have in mind?”
Alastor merely nods, and starts leading you down to the kitchen. “I was thinking you could assist me with breakfast, and then we can do some minor paperwork! We’ll decide what to do after that.”
You happily agree, and trail after him, leaving just enough space so you can’t ump into him. 
“We are going to make french-toast, fried green tomatoes, and ham. Should be simple enough, dear!” He snaps, and the two of you are wearing aprons. You let out a surprised laugh, and smile up at him.
“I will never get over how cool that is!” 
He waves you off, and starts pulling things out of the cabinets. He hands each one to you, waiting for you to make contact. 
Then it happens.
You jerk your hand back so fast that the whisk he’d been handing to you falls to the floor with a clatter. Your whole body seems to shrink in on yourself, and your expression collapses.
“Oh. Oh, no. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” You start rambling apologies, and it makes Alastor’s head cock to the side.
“Why are you sorry, dear?” His voice lilts with just the slightest amount of amusement, but you don’t seem to catch on to it. 
“I- I touched you! I’m sorry! I don’t know how to do it appropriately, and I’m sorry! You have more boundaries than the others and I just-” Your rambling starts to annoy him, just the slightest bit, and his eyes narrow.
“I would tell you, if I had a problem with it,” he starts. “You don’t normally have a problem. Why is it a problem now?”
You frown, harshly. It is the first time he has seen such a negative emotion on your face. (Something in him is unsettled at the sight. He ignores it, as he often does). “What do you mean? That’s not the same!”
Alastor is now genuinely confused. It is absolutely the same! How could it not be?
You seem to catch onto his confusion, and a small growl rips from your throat in frustration. “I’m okay with people touching me first, because that’s initiating contact, and they lead the whole time. It’s easier to understand what people want, and where it is okay to touch, based on how they feel, and how they are touching me. But, but when I do it first, it’s hard to know what’s okay! I don’t have someone to mimic, and it’s- it’s hard!” Your face contorts further, and you’re palpably angry. 
“All these social rules, and stuff can be so hard sometimes! It’s easier to just not do it! How can I hurt anyone if I don’t give myself the opportunity, you know?” You sigh, and drop your upper body on the kitchen island’s counter. “It sucks,” you say, your voice muffled by the counter.
Alastor feels a modicum of sympathy. You nearly have the exact opposite problem to him. You want to touch other, craving that closeness, but don’t know how to go about it. He would rather go without it, but knows exactly how to use touch on others, especially to get what he wants.
His mind whirls with thoughts of how pathetic you seem like this. You are normally so confident! Why let this silly worry prevent you from being the best you can be? His thoughts settle on a plan before he can really acknowledge it. 
“Alright then, dearest!” Alastor smacks the counter, drawing your attention. “I have an idea. A challenge, if you will. To help you get over this silly fear of yours, I challenge you to this; you must touch me every day, at least once. Each touch must be a different kind than the last, and it can’t be for the same reason.” Alastor tilts his head at you, waiting for you to take the bait.  “You are allowed to do it without asking, and it can be as big or small as you are comfortable with, but you need to do it. If you can do this, to the point where you are comfortable hugging the others without worrying about “hurting” them, then you win.”
Your head pops up from the counter, and you narrow your eyes at him. “What do I win?”
Alastor feels his grin widen. Yes, you would be fun to play with. “A small favor. Something simple. And confidence. It’s a shame that you are being held back by something so simple!”
You huff, but nod your head. “Fine. I touch you, once a day, unsolicited, and it’s gotta be different each time, or something like that. I win when I can hug everyone else without being touched first.”
“There’s my girl,” he says, watching your whole body stiffen in response. He laughs, and picks up the whisk from the floor. “Let’s continue with breakfast, yes?”
The first time you touch him is during a “movie night” that Charlie sets up the next day. She demanded Alastor participate, despite his well known hatred of television, and everything to do with that technology. You had silently approached him as the group set up pillows and blankets on the floor around the TV, and against the couches. The two of you watched idly, before you spoke up.
“Can I sit with you,” you asked softly. 
“Of course, dear! Good company might make this terrible idea more… palatable,” Alastor grumbled. You smile at him, and laugh a little. 
“Oh, the horror. Sitting with your friends, and relaxing,” you respond, tilting your head at him. His static surges for a moment, but he says nothing in response. You laugh again, although he’s not quite sure why.
When the group finally gets settled in for the movie, and the lights are turned off, he watches you shift about in your seat. Your eyes dart around the room, and your hands fidget. It takes a few minutes, the intro to the movie already going, for you to finally look at him. You scoot closer to him, more than halfway across the couch. You wait another moment, and Alastor’s eyes don’t move from your form. He just watches you fidget with amusement. Finally, you speak up, barely a whisper.
“Hey, can- can I lean on you?” You are so hesitant, and it makes his eyebrows furrow, just the slightest. 
“Of course, dear,” he whispers back, his static barely a murmur. Your body slackens, all the tension drawn out. 
“Oh, good,” you mumble, pressing your small form against his side. It takes a few moments, but then you are completely calm against him, head pressed into his arm, your hands against his waist, and knees curled up under you and tucked against his thigh. You mumble something about him being warm, and all Alastor can do is agree. 
You are so very warm, and it has him almost anxious. He isn’t sure what about, as the room is calm, and the silly animated picture-show is easily ignored. You are so very warm, and he can feel each breath your body breathes in. He can nearly hear the soft pound of your heartbeat, even over the picture-show. His nose twitches at your scent. He will have to take a far-too hot bath later to remove it. It’s fine, though. It’s all part of the game. 
Alastor ignores that you’ve fallen asleep on him. It’s for the best.
The next day, you offer him a “fist-bump”, which he doesn’t understand. You laugh, and explain the gesture, and show him how it looks.
“You do it when you did something cool, or when you’re having fun with your friends.” You smile at him and constantly gesture with your hands while you talk. It keeps his attention quite easily. “Ah, here, let’s see if you understand. What was the last cool thing you did? It can be whatever.”
Alastor thinks over the last few days exploits, and shrugs. “I made a sinner cry by merely looking at him, this morning.” 
You go stock still before bursting out laughing. “Really? Oh my gosh. Seriously, fist-bump,” and you offer your knuckles. Alastor hesitantly returns the gesture, knocking your hands together. However clumsily it was done, it makes your smile wider. “Nice! Yeah, that’s exactly how you do it!”
If he tries the gesture on the others later on, he never tells you. Charlie got a kick out if, though. He refuses to tell her who told him about it. 
One day, you’re assisting Niffty cleaning, but can’t reach a spot way too high for either of you to get. Neither of you can find a ladder, and Alastor is watching with a far too delighted smile. When you spot him, you smile mischievously.
“Alastoorrrrr,” You call, your eyes narrowing playfully. “Come here. Please.”
He strides over, not letting his hesitance show. “What can I do for you, my dear?”
“Can I get up on your shoulders? I need to be able to reach that spot with the duster.” You point up at where you need to dust. He looks over at it, and realizes you are definitely not getting  up there without help.
Alastor cocks his head at you, thinking over the logistics, and then nods. He kneels down, and feels you pull yourself onto his back, propping each leg over his shoulders. When you are still, hands gently around his neck, he stands up straight. He feels you wobble and then balance with a laugh. Your hands let go of him. He feels each breath and laugh and words from you gently vibrate his head with how close the two of you are. 
“I’m so tall! Hahah! This is great! I wish I was always this tall, haha!” You keep laughing, and readjust your duster, pointing at your destination. “Onwards, my steed!”
Alastor rolls his eyes at your antics, but obliges, standing closer to where you need to be. Niffty is squealing, and it’s making you laugh harder. Alastor joins in at some point, and then the three of you are running around the first floor of the hotel, terrorizing the others with your hijinks.
Alastor thinks, privately, that you make him laugh over the little things, something that he hasn’t done in a while. He isn’t sure how to feel about it.
It’s several weeks after the challenge had been initiated, that he finds you hiding in a side-closet. Alastor isn’t sure how he knew you would be there, but the discovery throws him. You’re crying. Nearly bawling your eyes out, and you look uncomfortable with the way your small body is curled into a tight ball, surrounded by cleaning supplies. 
“Oh, hey, Al,” you say, your voice rough. “How’d you find me?”
“Just needed to follow the sound of despair, apparently, my dear,” he responds without a thought. He nearly winces when his words process, and he shakes his head. “I’m not sure, dear. Whatever are you doing in there?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Something upset me, but I can’t remember what.” Your voice trails off, and you look at where you have situated yourself. You huff, and pull yourself out with a grunt.
You dust off your knees, and the back of your pants, frowning. “Sorry you had to see that, haha.” You try to muster a smile, but Alastor sees right through it. “Right.”
Alastor simply watches as you shut the closet door, and try and calm yourself down. 
“Gosh, I feel dumb.” You frown at the ground, and sigh. “Alright. Can I have a hug?”
Alastor’s eyebrows raise. Oh. You were finally ready to hug him. How interesting. 
“Of course, dear.” He opens his arms, not even bothering to check for others seeing the interaction. You rub your face, and then step between his arms. You wrap yourself around him, loose at first, and then you embrace him hard. His arms fall around you, and he pulls you in close. His head settles on top of yours. 
You are still so warm, and you smell wonderful; something comforting, something familiar. Your heart thrums against your ribs, and he can feel it pounding. His ears twitch at every soft sound. 
This is nice. Although there is still time, part of him mourns the day you are ready to win his challenge. He supposes he can enjoy each little bit of connection the two of you have, until then. 
Taglist: @numetalnerd2007 @girl-nahh-two Remember, you can be added to my taglist by replying to the tagged post on my page!
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mostlymarvelsstuff · 1 year
Text
Yours For The Taking
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Authors note: everyone say thanks to @romanoffsbish (and sorry for the late post guys, didn’t realize it was the 4th lol)
Warnings: Nat has a penis, typical a/b/o stuff(claiming, mating, knotting), sexual content (oral sex, vaginal sex)
Word count: 6632        Nat Masterlist   Marvel Masterlist
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    To say Natasha wasn’t like other Alphas would be a massive understatement. After everything you've done to gain her affections and attention, any other Alpha would have pounced on you by now, but not Natasha. And even more frustratingly it’s not like she's ignoring you or uninterested, the way she reacts to you tells you she is, but she never acts on this.
   Every gentle caress you give her arm or cheek has her leaning in, chasing more of your touch. Every compliment you give her has her smiling shyly with pink dusted cheeks as she softly compliments you in return. Every flirtatious remark you give her leaves her blushing profusely and has her looking down at the floor in order to stutter out a response. And on the rare occasions where she's the one to flirt, well it's the most pitiful thing you’ve ever heard. It's nothing like what she can accomplish on missions or when she's being playful with the guys, no it's more akin to what a nervous college boy would say while at the bar.
  And whenever you pump out your pheromones in an attempt to lure her in, you see how she reacts. In fact you take great pleasure in watching how you affect her. It starts with her eyes dilating, followed by her licking her lips. Next her breathing increases and her limbs tremble ever so slightly. Then lastly she shifts to adjust her pants before promptly leaving the room. 
   So really it's quite clear she harbors some type of feelings for you, but for some reason she just doesn't act on them. You’ve never known an Alpha to behave in such a way, but then you've never known an Alpha that had such an unusual and cruel upbringing as she had. You figured it had something to do with her shyness and quietness with her obvious attraction, it's why you tried so hard, you wanted to work her out of her shell. Unfortunately that approach is slow going. 
   “Have you seen Nat?” you ask, entering the kitchen and to your annoyance  Wanda gives you a knowing look. Damn perceptive Alpha
   “She's at SHIELD” Kate answers through a bite of Yelenas special mac & cheese, “I think she's doing something with the recruits today. At least that's what Clint said”
   You nod, “Thanks Kate. If anyone needs me- ”
   “You’ll be at SHIELD” Wanda finishes, sending you a wink
   It doesn’t take you long to get to SHIELD, and once you get there you’re treated for a show. Natashas in her black leggings that hug her form perfectly, with her black tank that shows off her sculpted biceps off to match. Her hair is back in a tight braid and she wears a proud smirk as one of the recruits, an overconfident young Alpha by the looks of him, hobbles away from her spot on the training mats. Seems she had been given the task of teaching the recruits hand to hand combat today, and she's not going easy on them. 
   Half of them looked like they've been asked to hogtie a rampaging Hulk, and the other half looked like they’d been run over by him while trying. You decide to hang back in the shadows by the doorway. You suspect she knows you're there, she is the Black Widow after all, but it's much more fun for you to watch this than make yourself known to the recruits in the room. It's not often you have the opportunity to shamelessly ogle her out in the field, so this is a very welcomed change.
   She easily fights her way through the next handful of recruits, offering them advice and criticism as she does so, and god does she look hot. Muscles flexing, sweat dripping down her porcelain skin, mischief shining in her eyes with that damn cocky smirk. You love getting to witness her in her element. Even more so when you know just how much she squirms when you remove her from it.
   “Alright, that's enough for today” she announces, wiping the sweat from her brow, “I don’t want to break any of Furys new guys”
   The crowd erupts in a symphony of groans at her remark, but one of the Alphas, the young man you remember from earlier gives her a defiant growl, “No way an ex KGB turncoat could break me”
  Her eyebrows knit together as she glares at him, a growl of her own leaving her throat, “Well, I’m not just an ex KGB agent McKinnon. I'm also a level 10 SHIELD agent and an Avenger, so rest assured, if I wanted to I’d send you to Fury in pieces. You're all dismissed.”
   You watch with a smug smile as she puts him in his place, making all the recruits quiet down before they all file out of the room. There's a definite slump to McKinnon's shoulders that has you quite proud of the Russian and you almost feel bad knowing that you're about to make her a stumbling mess
  “Hey Natty” you call out, walking towards her with a smile
   Her gaze shoots over to you and a familiar pink settles across the apples of her cheeks as she remembers that you walked in a while ago, which means you not only got to witness her fighting skills but you also got to see her tell off the younger Alpha. She secretly hopes you enjoyed both displays of strength
   “Hi-Hey” she stutters, and her brows furrow in frustration at herself. She takes a deep breath before trying again, “Hi Y/n”
   Your smile never falters which helps put her at ease, and a smile of her own breaks across her features, “Have fun tossing around Furys new rookies?”
   “You have no idea” she replies, her cocky smirk returning briefly, “I don’t understand why they always hate hand to hand combat training.”
   Your eyes rake over her as you chew on your bottom lip, “Yeah, me either”
   Her blush returns ten fold and she fidgets with her fingers in her nervousness, “So uh, what um, what brings you over here?”
   “Well…” you draw out, letting your hand trail up her bicep, making her swallow thickly, “I thought you might be hungry after such an active afternoon. Wanna grab lunch?”
   “Yeah, sure” she answers, trying not to sound too eager to spend time with you even though she absolutely was, “Where were you thinking?”
   “I haven’t decided yet. Why don’t you go grab a quick shower, and by the time you're done I’ll have a place picked out”
   She nods, “I’m holding you to that”
   “And what's that supposed to mean?” you ask, a knowing smile on your face
   She smiles and holds her hands up in surrender as she takes a few steps back towards the locker rooms, “Nothing, nothing. You can just be a little indecisive, that's all”
   “Don’t make me go to lunch without you” you tease, knowing full well you would never do such a thing. But the slight crease of worry in the Alphas brows tells you she doesn’t realize that, “Go shower Natty. I’m not leaving without you.”
  “Ok” She blushes, still not entirely used to your ability to read her so easily, “I won’t be too long. Be right back”
   You nod and watch her walk away, shamelessly letting your eyes look over her toned back before traveling down to glance at her muscular thighs. And you'd be lying if you said you didn’t admire the sway of her hips as she walked through the locker room door. 
   There was no doubt Natasha was a very physically attractive Alpha, and you did admire her muscles and her beauty, but there was far more to her than that. Her smirk could give you butterflies, her sense of humor never failed to make you laugh, her sarcastic quips always amused you, her laugh always made you smile, her kindness was incredible for someone that had been through so much hardship, her smile could always brighten your day, her protectiveness always made you feel safe and cared for, her eyes were always so warm and welcoming, her physical and mental strength was awe inspiring, her gentleness proved how good of a heart she had as most Alphas were much more rough, and her touch. 
   God her touch, it practically set your skin ablaze and had your heart beating wildly inside your chest. But the adorable Alpha was so shy and unsure that she didn’t indulge in this too often, much to your chagrin. But when she did, you could tell she felt the same sparks you did. Which made her lack of initiation frustrating at times.
   “Hey, you ready?”
   Her voice brings you out of your thoughts and you nearly sputter at how quick she was, “Jesus, if your hair wasn’t wet I would think no water even touched you. You were only gone like six minutes”
   “Well, you know SHIELD taught us those quick military showers when we were recruits and anytime I’m here that training just sorta kicks in” She laughs it off trying not to let you know she was so quick because of her excitement, “So, where are we eating?”
   “I was thinking Italian, so B’artusi?”
   Her eyes light up, “Yeah, sounds good. Come on, the subway will get us there the quickest”
   As you descend the stairs into the subway you try not to let your anxieties show, but as usual the Alpha is able to read you easily
   She eyes you carefully, “Everything ok?” 
   “Yeah, I'm good. I just don’t take the subway too often since it's not really that safe for Omegas on their own, so seeing and smelling all these Alphas makes me a little nervous” you reply, taking a deep breath in an attempt to focus on her pine and jasmine scent, “That must sound a bit silly coming from an Avenger”
   “I don’t think it's silly” she replies, looking at you in the gentle way that she does, “In a way i can understand.”
   “Really?” you ask, finding comfort in the fact that the brave Alpha could relate 
   She nods, “Yeah, all the scents can be overwhelming. But if you get stressed, just remember I’m right here.”
   “Thanks Natty” you say, smiling softly making her heart melt
   The two of you make your way through the crowd until the subway car is in view. You both allow the people in front of you to file in before following and Natasha heads in first. She leads you to an empty section of seats towards the back and lets you sit down first before taking the seat next to you. The doors then close and the subway takes off.
   The ride proceeds as normal, stopping a few times to let people on and off before taking off again. During all this you focus on Natasha, having an easy casual conversion to distract yourself from the constant changing smells of Alphas. It works, for a while at least. But at the last stop a group of four rowdy Alphas board. 
   They’re loud and obnoxious, but nothing you haven’t seen before. Their scents bother you though, and by the looks of their attire it's easy to understand why. They’re fresh from the gym and high on adrenaline, and coupled with their rowdiness their pheromones are working in overdrive. It's bad enough that you even see the redhead's nose twitch a few times.
    Their gaze eventually turns to you and subconsciously your leg starts bouncing to help quell your anxieties. To help calm yourself further you reach out for Natashas hand. Not expecting the contact from you, the Alpha stiffens at first, but when realization hits her she settles and tries to ignore the warmth rushing to her cheeks. Distracted, she fails to notice the group take in her unusual reaction and being more brawn than brain they don't read it as shyness, they see it as a lack of interest.
   “Hey there baby” the gruff voice of the lead Alpha calls out, “Why don’t you come over here with me and my boys? We’re more than willing to give you our undivided attention”
   “Yeah, might even give you a nice treat” another of them snickers, adjusting the crotch of his shorts 
   “Back. Off.” Natasha growls, her hand moving from your hand to your hip, and she pulls you closer as she pumps out her pheromones. You know it's to drive the other Alphas back, but you can’t deny that it has the opposite effect on you. You’d do anything to melt against her right now and bury your face against her neck.
   “I think you're the one that needs to back off.” he says, chuckling with a cocky smirk, “In case you haven’t noticed, you're a little outnumbered. And I think we’re better suited to care for her needs”
   Her lip curls with another growl, a deeper one this time as she puffs out her chest. Cleary these dumb, overly cocky assholes had no idea that the Alpha they were messing with was an Avenger. Let alone the Black Widow, an Alpha that could easily mop the floor with all of them. But you both have a feeling they're very close to finding that out.
   “Poor ‘mega. We can take care of you baby” another one of them suddenly says, stepping closer to you. He pays no attention to your obvious discomfort as you attempt to shift away from him and closer to Natasha, and he crosses yet another line by cupping your jaw, “One of us might even keep you after we’ve all had our turn”
   And that's all it takes for Natasha to lose what small shred of patience she had left.
   A few minutes later the train stops at your station, and Natasha makes her way back over to where you sit. You smile as she takes the incentive to grab your hand, and she leads you over the pile of unconscious Alphas towards the train's exit. Once the two of you make it to street level your sense of peace returns and Natasha is able to relax once more and put her focus back on you and your lunch date. At least that's what she hopes this is, though she won’t risk asking.
   “I was thinking about getting fettuccine alfredo at first, but now I'm thinking about shrimp penne.” she tells you with a smile, “What about you?”
  “Mmm, I’m thinking baked ziti. Oh! Or maybe a creamy chicken carbonara”
   “Good choices” she says, opening the restaurants door for you
   The two of you get a table near one of the main windows, giving you a nice view of the bustling city life. Cars, cabs, bikes, buses and people pass by in blur as they all go about their day and you're content to watch them do so from your cozy seat inside the quaint restaurant. 
   “Sometimes I forget that there's a certain beauty to city life” you hear the Alpha across from you admit, “You can’t really notice it when you're caught up in it, or world saving missions but when I take a step back, I can easily see it”
   Your gaze shifts from the window and over to her, and you're almost taken aback when you find her already looking at you, her eyes shining with emotions you cannot seem to place. She offers you a shy smile and you don’t hesitate to smile in return, letting your hand brush against hers on the table. Her pinkie twitches, but she doesn’t move away.
   “Thanks for deciding to take a step back with me today, Natty”
   When the waitress shows up neither of you accept the menu she offers, instead you both go for one of your earlier options. Nat decided to go with the fettuccine and you choose the carbonara. It doesn’t take long for your meals to be brought out to you and neither of you wait to dig in.
   “How's yours?” she asks after swallowing a mouthful of her own pasta
   You nod, “Very good. What about yours?”
   “Delicious. I’ll definitely be ordering it again.” she says as she gathers some up on her fork. Before she can bring it to her mouth though your hand grasps her wrist, and you bring her hand, and fork over to your own mouth. She watches with pink cheeks as you take it into your mouth.
   “Mmm, you're right. That's very good. I’ll have to order it next time.”
   “I uh, I- yeah. Yeah.” she stutters, finally bringing her arm back over to her plate
   Enjoying her flustered state you can’t resist the urge to release some of your pheromones, further antagonizing her. It’s not that you want to upset her, no, you just want her to act on her natural Alpha urges. And she desperately wants to, but it's not like the Red Room taught courses on the subject of courting and mating, quite the opposite really. They did their best to strip those instincts from her, leaving her perplexed on what to do in situations like these.
   You watch as she inhales your strawberry and plum scent, making her eyes dilate and you focus on her tongue as it pokes out to wet her lips. You give her a not so innocent smile and her grip tightens on her fork as she tries to rid herself of the not so appropriate thoughts running through her mind. And as if she was unaware of the affects you have on her, her cock twitches, further proving how much she wants you.
  She averts her gaze from you and squirms slightly, really hoping that no one in the restaurant, especially you, notices her particular dilemma. But she decides to play it safe and excuses herself to the bathroom before it can get any worse. 
   She swallows thickly and leans against the sinks countertop, taking a deep breath before looking at her reflection. She internally curses at how lust crazed she looks, but the curses don’t stay internal once she sees the tent in her pants.
   “Damnit, get it together” she chastises herself, moving her shaking hands over to the sink. She turns the water on and collects a bit in her hands, bringing it up to splash her face. To move her focus away from the throbbing in her pants she does some deep breathing, and she's relieved to find that seems to be doing the trick.
   After about five minutes she returns to the table and she really hopes it wasn’t obvious why she had left. It was though, to you at least because you knew exactly what you were doing. Still, you don’t tease her about it.
  “Do you want to get dessert before we leave? We can split it if you want.”
   She sits back down across from you and smiles, “Yeah, I’d like that”
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   It's been almost a week since lunch with Nat, the two of you have unfortunately been kept at a distance with all the missions and paperwork that have been assigned. Sure you'd seen each other and been able to say a handful of words but it was much different than the way you'd both normally be able to do things together like watching movies, working out or just talking over coffee. But at least the two of you had still been able to text. That's how you knew she was free this afternoon after training the SHIELD recruits again, and thankfully you were free too.
   “Where are you off to?” Tony asks, watching you walk through the compound with a pep in your step
   “Gonna surprise Natty over at SHIELD. I haven’t seen her in a few days.”
   He does his best to hide his knowing smirk with his cup of coffee, “Well have fun watching her beat them up”
   “I will!” you reply, making your way to the elevator
   Once you make it over to SHIELD headquarters you're a bit surprised to find Yelena in the training room, watching her sister work.
   “Hey Lena”
   “Oh, hey Y/n” She greets with a smile, “What are you doing over here?”
   “Well, Natty and I haven’t seen each other in a few days so I was hoping to do something today, but if you have plans with her…” you draw out, trying not to let your disappointment show
   “No, no plans” she tells you, “Fury just wants me to start training recruits as well so today I was made to watch her teaching technique. It's very….”
   “Rough?” you offer, as resounding thud of a recruit hitting the mat rings out
   The blonde smiles, “I was going to say hands on, but yes. Rough fits”
   The young and cocky Alpha from the other day currently leans up against the back wall. He's angered by the fact that he, and none of his other fellow recruits have managed to even make Nat break a sweat, let alone get the upper hand on her. But when he sees you enter the gym, he decides on a different approach to get under the Alphas skin.
   Just as she's about to dismiss everyone off to the locker rooms she spots him approaching her, and she huffs in annoyance as she knows something is coming
   “Wow” he breathes out, looking past her, “Y/n is absolutely gorgeous, isn’t she Romanoff?”
   Her jaw clenches at his tone, but she does in fact follow his gaze over to you. A warmth bubbles in her chest when she sees you, she's missed you these past few days. Unfortunately she's not able to appreciate you long as McKinnon still has more to say.
   “And to think she's still unmated. Means I still have a chance, I am afterall a worthy and untainted Alpha, unlike you. How red is your ledger exactly?”
   She's taken aback by his statement, not only because he's never once said anything about you indicating his attraction but also because no one has ever been so forward with her, essentially challenging her in her affections for you. But what really sets her off isn’t his dig at her past, it's how his gaze glues itself to your ass 
   Yelenas eyes suddenly meet hers and she realizes that she doesnt think like he does, meaning she really could be the Alpha for you, even if she doesn’t have a clue on what she's doing. She sees you, all of you, and she enjoys it all. That has to make her worthy, right? 
   “Listen here McKinnon” she growls, pointing a finger deep into his chest muscles, “If you put even half as much effort into your training as you did making me mad, you’d already be a level four agent.”
   His eyes widen slightly as she takes a very protective tone and he instinctively takes a step back from her. It does no good, as she simply steps forward, smirking at the way his knees nearly buckle as her angry scent surrounds him
   “A word for the wise, agent. It's not very smart to piss off someone that has both the clearence and the skill to make you disappear without a trace” she growls, roughly shoving him before turning on her heels
   She starts making her way over to you and her sister then, hopeful that her confidence from putting him in his place won’t fade as you're sure to make her stumble. Yelena had seen everything as she kept you busy with conversation and she gives the older Russian a knowing smirk as she approaches. .
   You notice her before she's even beside you, her scent is strong today. Much stronger than usual. It makes your knees wobble and your hands sweat. And the way her muscles all flex when she greets her sister with a side hug has your mouth going very dry. Both of which are things you're not accustomed to dealing with when it comes to the Alpha.
   “Hey Y/n” she greets, her normally shy smile replaced with a natural one that has butterflies erupting in your stomach as your heart races
   “Hi Natty” You greet in return, wrapping your arms around her for your usual hug
   There's the smallest amount of irritation and discomfort lingering in her scent, something you can really only notice when you're this close to her. Subconsciously your instincts take over and you end up scenting her to help ease her. Though you don’t notice you’d done this, she does, and it thrills her. In response to this her grip on your hips tightens, almost possessively so as her eyes bore into McKinnon's who is off sulking behind you. And the longer you stay in her embrace, the hazier your mind becomes.
   Eventually you both break apart and Nat is sure to puff her chest out to McKinnon to further deflate his ego. Watching her show off to the younger Alpha while her scent swirls around you has arousal pooling in your belly as your mind wanders to all the things you’d want Natasha to do to you, and with wide eyes you finally realize what's going on. Your heat has been triggered.
   It had already been closely approaching, but you thought you could handle yourself around Natasha, like you had in the past. Apparently your exhaustion from the past few days was enough to lower you to the edge, and with your need for the Alpha her scent had been enough to throw you over head first. And you absolutely cannot be out in the open for this
  “Well, it was nice you Yelena…Natty, I’ll uh, I’ll text you!” you rush out before quickly fleeing
   Nats' confused reply dies on her tongue as your scent hits her and Yelena like a truck. Her brows furrow when she picks up on how different it is. It lingers in the air longer than it normally would and it's sweeter too. Did that have something to do with why you’d taken off like that? It had to, because why would you come all the way to SHIELD only to leave without even having a conversation with her…were you hurt? Sick maybe? She wasn’t sure, but she knew she had to find out.
   “Somethings up with Y/n. I need to make sure she's ok.” the Alpha stresses, not wanting to just abandon her sister but needing her to understand
    “Go. Check on your Omega” she tells the older woman
    “She's not mine” Nat hisses, her cheeks once again turning pink as she turns to practically bolt off to the locker room
   A knowing smirk spreads across the blondes face and she mutters a quiet, “Not yet anyway”
   The redhead quickly gathers her belongings and heads for the garage, hardly even noticing how she manages to shoulder check McKinnon on the way out. She hops on her motorcycle, revs the engine and speeds back to the compound. By the time she gets there she's too worried to wait for the elevator, and opts to take the stairs instead. She takes them two at a time, hardly even huffing as she exerts herself.
   Finally she makes it to the main floor for the Avengers, and she tries her best to not just burst through the stairwell door. She takes a deep breath to calm her racing heart and her nerves before opening the door and walking in. She makes her way through the entryway and living areas without bumping into anyone, but unfortunately that comes to an end once she reaches the kitchen.
  “Hey Romanoff” Steve calls out, beckoning her to come closer for a conversation. Her muscles tense in irritation at his poorly timed request but since he is head Alpha, she relents. 
   As he begins to drone on about whatever it was Fury said she finds her mind checking out of the conversation. She can feel her frustration bubbling under her skin, he's keeping her from you. It's not intentional, she knows that. But she also knows that something is going on with you, and she doesn’t like not knowing if you're alright.
   In your room you squirm in your nest, a futile attempt to get comfortable as a layer of sweat starts to cover your body and you let out a pitiful whine when your core throbs painfully. Trying to comfort yourself you bring your shirt up and inhale deeply, letting the lingering scent of the sweaty Alpha you hugged earlier seep into you.
   Unfortunately this does the opposite to help you. You can feel your slick dripping down your thighs as your entire being aches for the redheaded Russian and despite knowing she very well may be oblivious to your current plight, you can’t stop yourself from reaching out.
   The Alphas phone dings suddenly and she manages to check it while Steve continues to ramble. What she sees, makes her heart race and her worry grow
    I need you. Please
   “Steve” she stresses, “I’ve gotta go”
   “Now wait just a minute” he tells her, grabbing her arm as she attempts to turn away
    She immediately turns to him, letting a growl slip past her lips. Surprised, the older Alpha lets her go and backs down against this challenge. He knows she wouldn’t brush him off without a reason if it wasn’t something important. She nods in thanks before running off down the hall that leads to everyone's quarters. When she arrives at your door she's too anxious to knock, instead she rushes in, only realizing that may have been a bad idea once the door shuts behind her and she finds herself within arms reach of your nest. 
   “Oh fuck” she exclaims, her mind already going hazy as your scent envelopes her, and her cock eagerly twitches, “You…you're in heat”
   You whimper, confirming this as you lock eyes with her, “Natty, need you so badly”
   Her mind races, at your declaration. She wants to believe you mean this so she can care for you and claim you as her own. But between how naturally needy heat can make an Omega and with how her Red Room training affects her Alpha instincts so much, she has her worries.
   “I-  you…you don’t know what you're saying right now” she stutters as she subconsciously takes a few steps closer to you
   “Baby, no, please. I want you so bad.” you whine, grabbing her hand, “I've always wanted you. Please Alpha, let me show you"
   The way you're looking at her has all hesitation fleeing her, unfortunately the nervousness didn't follow, "I uh…o-okay"
   "Yeah?" You question, pulling her closer to you as you sit up
   She nods, "Go ahead Omega. Show me"
   Your heart hammers at hearing her say it and you practically launch yourself into her arms to capture her lips in a searing kiss. Her arms wrap tightly around you, holding you protectively as you take her breath away. Unsure if it's the intensity of your scent or the lack of air that's causing her dizziness she breaks away.
  “That was…wow” she stutters, a large dopey grin spreading across her face 
   You return the grin before nuzzling into her neck, breathing in her strong scent. Her hands gently rub your back and a soft purr escapes you as you bask in her presence. You've longed to have her this close and judging by the way her hold on you tightens, she's longed for it too.
   Eventually you back out of her grasp, but still hold onto her hand and you begin to lead her over to your bed. She follows, her hand in yours as you lead her to the bed, and you gently press your lips against hers once more.
  "This all because of me baby?" You hum, your hand softly cupping her bulge
   "Yes" she whimpers, pushing her hips further into you, "Your scent drives me crazy…"
  "Yours drives me crazy too" you admit, placing a gentle kiss against her scent gland as your hands begin to pull at the bottom of her shirt
   She eagerly lifts her arms for you, allowing you to practically rip it off her before tossing it to the floor, her bra quickly joining it. Gently you press your hands against her shoulders to get her to sit. She does so, shifting around in an attempt to get comfortable as her hard cock strains against its confines. 
   Your hands travel to her waistband then and she lifts her hips allowing you to pull her pants and boxers down and she lets out a sigh of relief as her clothes pool around her ankles.
   Your mouth waters as you watch her cock rise to almost meet her toned abs, and you give her a smirk before letting one of your hands begin to slowly jerk her off. She groans, letting her head fall back slightly as you pleasure her and you watch a drop of her precum drip onto your thumb. It takes everything in her not to whine as she feels you let go, but her pupils blow wide as she watches you lick your thumb, tasting her essence. 
   “You taste better than I imagined” you purr, watching the way she blushes
   “You- you imagined tasting me?” she asks, her hopeful tone sending a warmth through you
You smile at her, “Of course I did, I imagined everything with you Natty. I told you, I’ve always wanted you”
   You kneel before her and lick your lips before taking her tip in your mouth, causing her hips to buck slightly. She gives you an apologetic look but you don't really mind as it allowed even more of her cock to enter your mouth and you quickly make her expression turn to bliss as you begin to bob your head up and down, taking what you could of her down your throat.
   She brings one of her hands to your head, tangling her fingers in your hair in an effort guide you, “Come on detka(baby), open wider for me….oh fuck, just like that”
   She guides the rest of her cock into your mouth with ease, letting herself enjoy its warmth as her eyes begin to roll back. Not used to something so big you gag a bit and the Alphas eyes immediately shoot open as she stares down at you with concern. It warms your heart to see her be so attentive to even the slightest of changes with you, but to ease her worries you let your hands rest on her bare thighs as you continue your actions.
   After a few more minutes you can feel the way her muscles tighten beneath your grip as well as hear the way her breathing picks up. Intent on pleasing your soon to be Alpha you double down on your efforts and are rewarded with a guttural moan from her as her fingers tighten in your hair
   “Y/n, I’m gonna….gonna cum” You hum around her cock in an effort to tell her it was ok, and she gets the idea, spilling her seed down your throat 
   After swallowing every drop you release her still hard cock with a ‘pop’ and happily smile at her as you stand. Without any warning she grabs you by the hips and pulls you into a kiss. It’s full of her passion for you, and you have no objections as she begins to remove your bra. It lands on the floor somewhere, and your underwear do too.
         Your hands find purchase on her shoulders before you swing your leg over hers as you straddle her lap. She can feel the heat of your core above her and her cock throbs as a bit of your slick drips down on her. You look her in the eyes as you slowly lower yourself, your hips softly swaying as you do, and her hands grip your waist tightly as you let out a moan.
    “You're so big” you whimper, taking a moment to adjust to her size
    She nuzzles against your neck to distract herself from the urge to wildly begin trusting up into you and begins to kiss and suck your soft skin. You take that as your queue to continue sinking down on her lap and you both let out a moan as your hips meet hers, letting her be fully buried inside you
  “Fuck, Y/n” she moans as you begin to bounce on her lap, “You're so warm around my cock detka(baby)”
  She begins to kiss and suck the soft skin around your neck, trailing her mouth down to your supple breasts until she can take one of your nipples into your mouth. You arch yourself further into her, wrapping your arms around her neck and burying your hands in her red locks and another moan slips past your lips as she hits that perfect spot inside you
   “Alpha!”
   Hearing her title fall from your lips while she's sheathed inside you does something to the Russian. It's like it unlocks all her hidden and buried instincts and brings them to the surface, and now there's no holding her back from her desires
   Suddenly and without warning  you're on your back on the mattress with Natasha hovering above you, her hips moving almost frantically as she pounds into your soaked cunt. Your nails dig into her shoulder blades and your legs wrap around her hips as you try to keep her as close as possible and the sounds you're making spur her on even more
   “Ooh, Natty!” you cry out, clutching at her as you quickly feel your orgasm approaching
   “You sound so pretty for me detka(baby)” she grunts, bringing her forehead to rest against yours, “On;y for me, right?”
   “Yes!” you answer, nodding as best you can, “Only want you Natty”
   She croons at your answer and nuzzles against your neck once more. You nuzzle against her as well, letting her scent overwhelm you and your mouth waters as you eye her scent gland. Without even thinking you give into the urge, sinking your teeth into her skin
   She moans as she feels you mark her, and her knot begins to form. You feel it too and just as it slips inside you, you strike. She moans as your teeth bite into her scent gland, her cum filling you as she locks into place and she's brought back to her senses by your gentle purr
   “All mine Alpha. Just as you should be”
   She hums in agreement before eyeing your scent gland and she takes the opportunity to sink her teeth into you then, causing you moan as you feel her teeth break through your skin. 
   When she pulls away she lovingly cups your face, her eyes glistening as she looks at you, “My beautiful Omega”
   You watch as a few tears spill down her cheeks, her other emotions finally catching up with her. A loving Omega that wants her, despite her abnormal Alpha behaviors and harsh past is something she never thought she’d be able to have. She never even hoped for it really, not until she met you. So now, having you claim her as your own is a dream come true
   You bring your hands to cup her face, letting your thumbs brush away her tears, “I love you Natty”
   “I love you too, Y/n” she admits, smiling at you, “So much. I just never knew what to say, or what to do”
   You smile back at her, “I know baby, and that's ok. We have each other now and that's all that matters.”
   She nods and lets her forehead rest against yours once more, “I’m going to do everything I can to make sure I take care of you properly, my Omega. I promise”
   “You already do Alpha. You have nothing to worry about.”
Taglist: @wandaromamoff69 @mmmmokdok @nataliasknife @natashasilverfox @when-wolves-howl @danveration @naomi-m3ndez @sheneonromanoff @sayah13 @likefirenrain @nighttime-dreaming @readings-stuff @chaoticevilbakugo @crystalstark02 @wackymcstupid @xchaiix @iaminluvwithnat @lovelyy-moonlight @blackwidow-3 @mistressofinsomnia @that-one-gay-mosquito @yomamagf @yourfavdummy @justarandomreaderxoxo @scoutlp23-blog @whoischanelle15 @lissaaaa145 @eline03 @wizardofstories @imthenatynat @marvelonmymind @fluffyblanketgecko @bitch-616 @dakotastormm  @zoomdeathknight @rayeofmoonlight ​
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footiehoefics · 7 months
Text
Chose to be friends, meant to be lovers
gif: @bracedes
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Hi guys! I've been working on this fic for a little while. It is the longest I've ever done but I always say the longer the better (lol). Let me know any feedback you have and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it! :) 7.0k words, TW none, Angst/Fluff, tags: @nightlockcornucopia
Y/N
“You know…Mason will probably be there tonight.” your friend said, smirking at you. To be honest you were not paying much attention to whatever she was saying, too concentrated on applying mascara. 
“Y/n did you hear me?” Aliyah said, waving her wand in front of your face. “Stop, you will ruin my makeup” you said giggling. “Sorry, yes I heard you.” You replied, closing the mascara tube and placing it where it belonged. You noticed Aliyah was still staring at you. 
“Can I help you?” you asked confused as to why she was still staring at you. Although you know why she was staring at you. “I said Mason will probably be there.” she said again. “Yea he probably will be so?” you said trying to sound unbothered. 
“Sooo…are you like gonna try and shoot your shot finally?” she said, leaning towards you smiling and waiting for your reaction. You rolled your eyes at her statement. “Will you stop with that please?” you said standing up. “Oh come on Y/n I know you better than anyone I know you’ve been falling for him HARD lately.” She was not wrong, you hated that she was not wrong. 
You tried to distract yourself by searching for an outfit in your closet. “Am I wrong?” Aliyah said, again bringing you back to earth. “Aliyah, please,” you said, more annoyed. She was not wrong; however, you know that the possibility of Mason having feelings for you was near 0. 
You had met Mason through a mutual friend at a party. It turned out you had a lot of friends in common and you started seeing him more often at parties or dinners. Of course, when you met him you knew who he was. You could not avoid the big murals for him around London. That and also, you could not avoid his radiant personality. He was charming, always with a smile on his face, and chatted to everyone. He was just a nice human being, very funny and of course, very dreamy. He was probably the most beautiful man you had ever met. 
At first, you and he were not close. Not because he didn’t try to talk to you. You were very shy. Social interactions, the majority of the time, make you feel awkward. Meeting someone new was hell for you, it was hard for you to just have a natural conversation without feeling self-conscious.  He became really good friends with your friend group, hence why you got more comfortable around him as time went by. You loved the way he would include you in conversations, try and get your opinion at times where you were not really talking. 
Fast forward a year later, you and him talked almost on a daily basis. You two were close but you always refrained yourself a little bit. You had noticed how he was always touchy with everyone, he loved to have his arm around someone while talking, hugging everyone. You knew if that man showed you even the slightest bit of affection, you would crumble. You already liked him physically and his personality. All of that combined with his love language would make you fall harder than you already have. 
It's not that he would never hug you or touch you, but you always told yourself “he does this with everyone, it does not mean anything with you.” Sometimes you did pull away and felt bad after the fact because he would look upset. 
“Y/n! I’m your best friend, why won’t you just admit it to me?” Aliyah asked with a pout. “Because there is nothing to admit, okay? We are friends and that is all we’ll ever be.” You closed your closet door and headed to the bathroom to get changed. 
Once inside, you shut the door, and rested against it, closing your eyes. You didn’t think it was that obvious you liked him. You really thought you were hiding it very well. You didn’t like when people tried to figure out if you like someone or tease you about it. It made you uncomfortable and it also made you act differently towards the person you have feelings for. 
You got dressed and looked at yourself in the mirror. You liked what you saw, and hoped Mason did too. Were you trying to look good for him? Yes. Would he say something about it? Maybe, but he probably would say the same thing about another friend. 
Once you stepped out, Aliyah looked at you smirking. “I think Mr. Mount will like it” she said, wiggling her eyebrows making you laugh. “See you're laughing!” she exclaimed. “I’m laughing because you are so annoying and weird.” You said in between laughs. “Yea right y/n.” 
You stopped again to look in the mirror hanging behind the bedroom door. “Y/n, you look great. I promise. And I mean it, Mason will like it.” Aliyah assured you hugging you from behind. “I love you.” You said smiling at her. “Well, I love you more. Ready then?” “Yes, I’m ready.” Both of you grabbed your purses and headed out to the car. 
Once you arrived at the party, two of your friends were already waiting for you at the door with drinks. “C’mon drink up, you guys have to catch up!” your friend Harry exclaimed. “Oh Jesus” you murmured to yourself, dreading the sting this shot of alcohol would cause.  You grabbed the shot glass, placed it in your mouth and threw your head back to drink it as fast as possible. 
Aliyah wiped her mouth and yelped at the flavor of the tequila. “Okay then, this will be your confidence boost to go talk to him.” She whispered in your ear making you giggle. 
Honestly, alcohol sometimes did that to you. It made you more social but in the mornings, you would end up regretting it. 
You walked inside and the place was packed. It was a house party, although right now it did not look remotely close to a house. You could not spot a single piece of furniture since it was so packed. 
“Oh God, finding everyone here will be hell.” Aliya stated, almost shouting because of the loud music, at you. 
Once you got through the swarm of people, you managed to reach the door that led to the back yard. When you stepped outside, you took in a big breath. It felt like there was no oxygen inside the house from the amount of people in there. 
Lucky you, Ben, Kai, Sophia, and all your other friends were outside drinking and hanging out. “Wow you guys made it through no man’s land” Ben said as he spotted you, Aliyah, Harry, and your other friend Nicolas. You all laughed at his comment. 
You all got settled in the outdoor furniture and started talking, laughing, and drinking. You didn’t spot Mason anywhere, not even when you were walking inside the house. You started looking around, trying to spot him but nothing. After 30 minutes, you decided to go inside to get another drink, well that’s what you told your friend. In reality you wanted to see if you could spot Mason. 
Squished between all those people, you could barely see anything. It started getting hot for you, you felt sweat on your forehead and your neck. You didn’t know if it was someone else's sweat or yours at this point. 
You couldn’t get past everyone to go back outside so you decided to head towards the bathroom. You wanted to tidy up, go back out and go around the house to the backyard. 
Once you reached the bathroom door, you opened it and saw your worst nightmare. Mason. With a girl. Kissing.
“Oh shit, um I’m so sorry!” you panicked and slammed the door closed. You stayed there frozen in your spot for a little bit. You were trying to get that image out of your head, but you couldn’t. Mason was against the sink, his arms firm on the sink. The girl had her arms wrapped around his neck and her lips on his. 
You couldn’t tell who the girl was. I mean how could you, you saw a microsecond of it and shut the door. And the microsecond you saw was her face mushed into his. 
You snapped out of your thoughts when you heard the doorknob of the bathroom moving indicating someone was opening the door. You moved away from the door and panicked, not knowing if staying waiting for him and her to come out was better than just running and pretending you never saw anything. 
Mason opened the door and saw the look of panic and shock in your face. He was about to say something when the girl stepped out behind him. 
You couldn’t believe it. You knew Mason was a lady’s guy, everyone knew that. You knew he would hook up with people, it hurt but what could you do? You were just his friend. You knew the type of girls he would hook up with, but you never thought he would go so low as to hook up with her. Alice. 
Alice was the only person in Mason’s friend group that never liked you and she made it clear by showing no interest in you. She would never talk to you, every time you said anything in a group conversation, she would roll her eyes. Aliyah always said it was because Mason was always with you at gatherings, and she felt jealous, part of you thought the same thing but why? You and Mason were just friends. 
You would always tell Mason how Alice never tried with you. He would always say you should try and talk to her to figure out why, but you never did. Well, you intended to but once you wanted to start the conversation, she shut you down. She made you feel like an idiot and said a lot of hurtful things. 
Of course, you told Mason, and he was furious. You told him not to do anything about it. Although not doing anything about it did not mean going out with her. 
It hurt regardless of who the girl was, but the fact that it was Alice hurt even more. He knew how shitty she made you feel. He knew and had witnessed her being crap to you. Yet here he was making out with her. 
“Sorry the bathroom was unlocked so I just opened it, I should’ve knocked.” Your voice was shaky, you felt like the waterfall of tears was threatening to fall. “Yea you should have.” Alice said, annoyed. You looked at her, then at Mason. Mason was red in the face and looked worried. 
You couldn’t bear the sight of them so you started heading towards the front door. 
“Hey Y/n, wait up!” you heard Mason from behind, but you were not in the mood to have that conversation right now. 
You felt him grab your arm once you got to the front door. “Y/n please listen-“
“Mason don’t, sorry I interrupted your time with her.”
“Y/n I’m so sorry, I know it looks bad-“
“You think?” you asked sarcastically, interrupting him again. 
He looked around, opened the door and pulled you outside with him. 
“Listen, I’m sorry, I was trying to take her to the kitchen because-“
“Mason please, stop. I don’t care what you two were going to do. You know, more than anyone, how shit of a person she is, especially with me, and you go and make out with her?” You didn’t mean to raise your voice, but you were hurt. You know you had no right to be mad at him for making out with someone but, your feelings were taking over your brain. 
“Okay, yes I understand, I know how she is, I promise kissing her was not what I wanted to happen, but why are you getting so mad?” he asked, taken back at your rage. 
“I mean, regardless of who it was, I don’t understand why you are so mad, you’re not my girlfriend.”  he said, making your face drop. 
Ouch. 
“Yea I’m not Mason but I’m your friend, right? And that is a slap in the face. What would you do if you found me making out with Nicolas?” you asked. 
Nicolas was one of your friends that didn’t vibe with Mason at all. You tried to brush it off but sometimes it was too visible. Mason had told you he didn’t like him, and vice versa with Nicolas. You tried to ignore them on that matter and just encourage them to talk to each other to settle their differences.
“That is different Y/n…” Mason replied. 
“Is it though?” you asked, raising your eyebrow.  
You didn’t want to keep harping on the subject. Yes you were not his girlfriend, but you wish you were. Now most definitely you would never be. 
You felt dumb and pathetic. You spent almost 2 hours getting ready to look beautiful and for him to maybe say something only for this to happen.  
You walked away from him to the main gate. You wanted to leave, not only because you saw what you saw but you knew emotions were getting the best of you and tears were filling your eyes. You didn’t want to make a scene at a party. 
You heard footsteps following you, and when you turned around you figured you would see Mason but it was Nicolas. 
“Hey hey where are you going?” he asked. Tears had already fallen and you looked hurt. 
“Hey, I’m um-“ you tried to get the words out but you choked on a sob. 
“It’s okay, I’m here.” Nicolas said, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you into a hug. 
You hugged him back. You didn’t care if it was him, you were hurt. 
You heard footsteps approaching and you figured it was maybe Aliyah, but you were surprised to see Mason again. 
“Nicolas, can I talk to her alone please.” Mason said sternly. 
Nicolas looked at you, then at him, and back at you. He put two and two together, realizing he was the person who hurt you. 
“What the fuck did you Mason?” Nicolas asked angrily. 
“It’s none of your fucking business, okay? I need to talk to Y/n, alone, so please fuck off.” Mason replied stone cold. 
You didn’t want this to get more heated so you intervened. 
“Stop, okay? I’m fine, I’ll just go home-“
“I’ll drop you off” Nicolas interrupted you, still not glancing away from Mason. 
“I think it’s better if I do, we need to talk-“ Mason tried to say. 
“I’m getting an uber so stop, both of you. I’m ordering it right now.” You said pulling out your phone not wanting to entertain any more bullshit. 
“I’ll wait here with you for the uber.” Mason stated 
“Me too.” Nicolas said, turning to you.
You rolled your eyes at how childish they were being. You waited about 10 minutes for your uber. 10 awkward minutes of silence. Once you finally saw a car approaching the house, you were grateful. 
You didn’t hug either of them goodbye, you just got in and left. 
Mason
Mason did not want to be at the party. He was ready to call it an early night, maybe ring you and ask if you wanted to go to his to watch a movie and order food. 
He was not in the mood to drink, party and definitely not in the mood to take care of drunk friends. He had a rough week filled with physios and meetings. 
However, Woody ended up convincing him. How? By stating you were going. Mason had developed feelings for you, this had been going on for a while, now that you two were much closer. 
He loved everything about you, but he couldn’t help but notice you sometimes pushed him away a bit. He didn’t know why, he had never given you a reason to. He tried to brush it off, but now that you two always talked and would always hang out, he wanted nothing more than to be more touchy with you and you resisted it sometimes. He knew you didn’t feel the same way, and it hurt him. 
Once at the party, Mason started scanning the sea of people to see if he could spot you. He couldn’t find you anywhere, so he went outside where all his friends were and asked Sophia if she had seen you. 
“No she’s not here yet, I think she and Aliyah were on their way.” She responded smiling. 
Mason thanked her and went back inside. He spotted Woody with some girls, of course. Once Woody saw Mason, he approached him smiling. “Mate I need your help.” Woody pleaded. “What do you want?” “I met this girl, she’s the one in the blue navy dress, see?” Mason moved his head a bit to see who she was. “Yea I see, what do you want me to do?” Mason asked, confused. “I need you to take Alice somewhere else, I want to be alone with her but she came with Alice so they are attached to the hip.” Mason rolled his eyes. “Mason c’mon, I’m not asking you to do anything with her I know you are waiting for your princess.” Woody said, teasing Mason, making him smile. “I’ll take her to the kitchen so she can talk to other people but if she comes back, it’s not my fault.”  Mason stated, moving towards Alice. 
Alice was always very flirty with Mason, and a lot of his friends knew that she had feelings for him. He didn’t want her to get the wrong impression. 
“Hey Alice, why don’t we go to the kitchen and get a drink?” Mason asked, immediately regretting it. She was visibly drunk, and he had just offered to give her even more alcohol. “Masey, hey of course!” she slurred. 
Alice grabbed his hand and dragged him to the kitchen where all the mixers and bottles were. She poured a drink for her and him with way too much alcohol. Mason was trying to get her to talk to everyone, but she was being very touchy with him. Grabbing his hand, rubbing the back of his neck when they were talking to someone else. He wished it was you doing that, not her. 
Shit. If you saw him right now with Alice all touchy and handsy, he knew you would get mad. He knew you despised her, and she despised you. 
Alice pulled him out of his thoughts. “Mason, can we go to the bathroom?” Hell no he thought. “Um, what do you need? Are you going to be sick?” he asked nervously. “Yea” she said, almost hanging from him. Mason sighed and agreed. He was almost carrying her to the bathroom. He didn’t want her to be sick in front of everyone. He didn’t like her, but he had to be a good person. 
Once inside the bathroom, Mason closed the door without locking it. 
“Okay, do you want me to hold your hair or do you have like a pony tail so your hair doesn’t get dirty?” he asked, and once he turned around he saw Alice just smirking at him. 
“Mase, seriously?” she said, almost laughing. 
Mason gulped. He didn’t want to be in this situation right now. 
“You know something I’ve always wanted to ask you?”
Mason looked nervous and confused. 
“Do you find me attractive?” she asked, batting her eyelashes at him and getting closer. 
“I mean, every girl is beautiful.” He said. 
Alice was very pretty, Mason knew that. But he never saw her as something else. Especially now that he had feelings for you. 
Alice got closer to him, and he backed away but stopped once he reached the sink. His hands were firm on the sink not wanting to do anything that might look like something else to her. 
“Mase c’mon, aren’t you like a lady’s man?” she asked, smirking. She was now closer, her hand around his neck.
He didn’t know what to do. He could perfectly smell the mix of perfume and alcohol. 
Without hesitation she leaned in and kissed him. He was taken back and didn’t stop it. He was frozen but the kiss didn’t last long. 
Someone came in and swung the bathroom door open. Mason pulled away quickly, trying to compose himself. Why did he just let her do that? Alice just pulled away laughing. 
Mason rolled his eyes at her. He grabbed the doorknob to open the door. 
Once he opened the door, he saw you. He didn’t know it had been you who had walked in just now. He was as shocked as you were. 
“Sorry the bathroom was unlocked so I just opened it, I should’ve knocked.” you said with a shaky voice. 
Mason felt horrible. He knew what he did was wrong. He wasn’t thinking about how you would feel at that moment, but to be fair he couldn’t think about anything. His mind froze. 
Alice stepped out of the bathroom a second later. “Yea you should have” Alice said, pulling out her lip-gloss from her purse and reapplying it. 
Mason saw you walking away from the scene and shouted at you to wait up. He wanted to explain everything. You wouldn’t stop walking and once he saw you reach the front door, he grabbed your arm to stop you. 
“Y/n please listen-“ he tried to say
“Mason don’t, sorry I interrupted your time with her.”
“Y/n I’m so sorry, I know it looks bad-“
“You think?” she interrupted him again . 
He looked around, opened the door and pulled you outside with him. 
“Listen, I’m sorry, I was trying to take her to the kitchen because-“
“Mason please, stop. I don’t care what you two were going to do. You know, more than anyone, how shit of a person she is, especially with me, and you go and make out with her?” you said, raising your voice. 
Mason knew what he did was bad, but he didn’t think you get this pissed off and emotional about it. Part of him hoped it was because there were some feelings involved but he didn’t know. 
“Okay, yes I understand, I know how she is, I promise kissing her was not what I wanted to happen, but why are you getting so mad?” he asked, taken back at your rage. 
“I mean, regardless of who it was, I don’t understand why you are so mad, you’re not my girlfriend.”  he said, making your face drop. 
He regretted saying it instantly. He didn’t mean for it to sound bitchy. He just wanted to get to the bottom of it. He wanted to know what you felt. Did you have feelings for him the same way he did with you?
“Yea I’m not Mason but I’m your friend, right? And that is a slap in the face. What would you do if you found me making out with Nicolas?” you asked. 
Mason hated him. Why? He knew and he could tell he had feelings for you. He also hated the fact that he had more confidence with you. Ever since Mason met him, they didn’t like each other but it was more of an unspoken thing. 
“That is different Y/n…” Mason replied. 
“Is it though?” you asked, raising your eyebrow at Mason. 
Y/N
Once you thanked your uber, you got out of the car and rushed to your front door. The whole drive back to your place your sobs were almost coming out of your mouth. 
You don’t know who you were madder at, him or yourself. 
Why on earth did you think he could feel the same way you did about him? Why? You were just friends. He was him. He was way out of your league. Why were you dumb enough to think you could end up with someone like him? 
All these thoughts plagued your mind while you were taking your makeup off. Removing the makeup revealed the redness on your face from crying. 
You washed your face to try and compose yourself, but all you could think about was that horrible image of Mason kissing her. 
He was right, you weren’t his girlfriend so why were you so mad? Alice is a good reason, but you were more jealous than mad. But how the hell would you tell him “Oh yea I’m mad because it’s not me you’re kissing, it’s her.”
After doing your skin care, you decided to just go to bed and try to get some sleep. At the end of the day, you could not let this ruin your life. It’s just a boy, that’s what you told yourself the whole night “it’s just a boy”, the problem was he was the perfect one. 
The next day, you were thankful you left early from the party. You were not in the mood to deal with a hangover. 
You did your normal morning routine, but also went in and checked on Aliyah. You knocked on her door, no answer. You knocked again, nothing. 
You opened the door and saw a sight you never thought you would see. Aliyah and a guy in her bed. Thankfully, they were covered, and nothing was out in the air. You giggled to yourself and closed the door. 
It was a free day so you decided to clean up a bit around the apartment and make yourself a yummy breakfast. After an hour had passed, Aliyah and the guy came out of their room. Her cheeks were bright pink and you could tell the guy felt awkward, scratching the back of neck. 
You couldn’t help but laugh at the sight. “Oh, shut up y/n” Aliya said, rolling her eyes. You laughed more and introduced yourself to the guy whose name was Andrew. “Well, it is nice to meet you, I cleaned up a bit around because I knew we had a guest over.” You said trying to tease Aliyah and making her laugh. 
They said their goodbyes and both of you sat down on the living room sofa. “Good night then?” you asked, taking a sip of your tea and raising your eyebrows. “Amazing” Aliyah responded, making you chuckle. 
“What about you? Nicolas said you left kind of early, what happened?” It all came back to you; all of the events from the night before. You had done a pretty good job at hiding it and not thinking much about it but now that Aliyah asked you couldn’t hide it anymore. 
You opened your mouth to say something but were quickly cut off with tears pouring out of your eyes. “Oh honey! What happened?” Aliyah asked now concerned and pulled you in a hug. You hugged her back tightly, just wanting to cry the emotions out. 
Once you had cried for a bit, you pulled away and tried to articulate everything. 
You told Aliyah everything. How she had always been right in saying you had feelings for him, how you dressed up yesterday for him, how you saw him kissing Alice, what he said to you afterwards and how mad you were at yourself for being so pathetic. 
“Hey stop it! You are not pathetic! You are allowed to feel sort of betrayed by him. And, you are allowed to have feelings for him and try to impress him. There is nothing wrong with that.” She said comforting you, rubbing your arm. 
“Babe, why didn’t you tell me when it happened? I would’ve come home with you and talked about it.” “No, no, I just wanted to be alone. Nicolas found me crying and I didn’t tell him either but he knew it had something to do with Mason and was mad.” You said remembering Nicolas had waited for you to get in the uber as well. 
“I mean duh, of course he would be mad. He has feelings for you.” Aliyah said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “What?” you asked, confused. “What?” “You just said he has feelings for me?” Aliya rolled her eyes at your question. “You are so naïve sometimes, oh my God.” “Aliyah, he has never said anything.” “I mean he doesn’t have to, it’s obvious. Also, why do you think he doesn’t really vibe with Mason?” Everything Aliyah was saying started making sense. “I guess it could be true…?�� 
Both of you spent the day on the sofa catching up on a series you started watching the week prior. You were both caught up on it, but the doorbell made you both look at each other. “Did you order anything?” you asked, thinking maybe she had ordered some food and it was the food delivery guy. Aliyah stood up to open up and replied with a no. 
Once she opened the front door, you both saw Nicolas standing there with some flowers. 
“Hello you!” Aliya said, hugging him. “How was your night?” he said, raising his eyebrows, he clearly knew what Aliya had been up to. “Well, obviously better than yours.” She said laughing. 
Nicolas stepped in the apartment and saw you curled up in the sofa, making his heart melt. “Hey Nic” you said smiling, standing up to greet him. He smiled and hugged you. “Whose are these for?” you asked confused. “Well, um they are for you.” He said shyly. You could see Aliya had that “I told you” look on her face. 
“I’m going to go take a shower and leave you guys” Aliyah stated rushing back upstairs to her room to give you both privacy. 
“Oh wow, why?” you asked, smiling a little. “Well, I wanted you to feel better after last night.” You started blushing. “Thank you, you didn’t have to.” You took the flowers and placed them on the kitchen counter. “I’m going to add water and put them in a vase, thank you.” “No worries.” 
You offered him some tea, he accepted and both of you sat in the living room talking. 
You liked Nicolas, he had been your friend since your first year of college. But you never saw him as something else. Honestly, maybe you should. However, you didn’t want it to turn into something just because you want to get over Mason. You respected him enough to not do that to him. Once you chatted for about an hour, you thanked him again for the flowers and said your goodbyes.  
You cleared up the tea mugs and were about to go upstairs until the doorbell rang again. 
You opened the door, and this was a sight you were not expecting to see. Mason. With flowers in his hand and a card. 
You both just stood there for a moment without saying anything, frankly you didn’t know what to say. He broke the silence, “Can I come in?” he asked. 
You stepped out of the way so he could come in. Once you both reached the living room and kitchen area you immediately regretted letting him in. The flowers Nicolas brought you were still on the kitchen counter in full display. 
Mason stopped in his tracks, taken back. His mind had a million thoughts going through his head. Were they yours or Aliyah’s? If they were yours, who gave them to you? 
“Did someone beat me to it?” he said, chuckling a bit, trying to cut the tension. He was hoping you would answer they were not yours, but his face dropped when you answered. “Um, kind of” you said, chuckling nervously. “Oh, I thought they might have been Aliyah's.” he said, whispering the last part to himself. 
“Can I ask, whose are they from?” Mason asked, dreading the answer. “Nicolas.” You spoke. 
This made Mason’s blood boil. Why would Nicolas bring you flowers? What did he want from you? Mason placed the flowers and the card on the kitchen counter. 
“Why did he bring you flowers?” he asked, annoyed. This now annoyed you. You didn’t owe him any explanation, especially after last night. 
“Why do you care?” you snapped. Mason looked at you with rage. “Just, because” he replied, trying to keep his voice calm. 
“Oh, well you’re not my boyfriend so why are you so mad?” you asked, satisfied with giving him a bit of his own medicine. 
All this tension had even made both of you forget his flowers and the reasoning behind it. Mason’s face dropped, and it gave you a weird feeling in your tummy. You didn’t want to hurt him, but after last night and how he was being right now he deserved it. 
“You know what, I came here to apologize and explain what happened last night but honestly fucking forget it.” He said scratching the back of neck frustrated with the whole situation. He didn’t say anything else and just left. 
You don’t know why you wanted to cry. You knew you hurt him with that comment, but he hurt you too. 
You went upstairs and instead of going straight to your bed, you knocked on Aliyah’s door. “Come in!” you heard from the other side of the door. 
You stepped in the room with tears in your eyes. “What the fuck happened? I thought it was a good thing what Nicolas did?” She pulled you in a hug yet again trying to comfort you. 
“Fuck, I feel so lame I’m crying over a boy.” You said sniffing and pulling away from her. You wiped the tears from your face. “Mason came by after Nicolas left.” “What!? What did he say?”
“Not much, he brought me flowers and a card as well, he saw the flowers Nicolas bought for me and got annoyed, started asking who gave them to me and I said Nic and he got even more annoyed, and then I said the same comment he told me yesterday, got mad and left.” You said, grabbing a Kleenex that Aliyah handed to you. 
“Babe this is like a rom com,” Aliyah said, chuckling to herself. “you’re like in a love triangle who would’ve thought.” She said teasingly trying to cheer you up. “C’mon Aliyah.” “Y/n I’m serious! Why else would Mason be mad that Nic got you flowers? They despise each other because they both have feelings for you. Damn, how are you so smart yet so naive?” she asked herself. 
You thought about it for a second, it made sense but at the same time why would Mason have feelings for you. 
“Wait, did you read the card?” Aliyah said, interrupting your thoughts. 
“No, it’s downstairs.” You said. Aliyah jumped out of bed and ran downstairs to go and get the card. She came back panting from running up the stairs. “Okay well then, read it, maybe it will give you more clarity.” She said handing the card to you. 
You opened the card and saw Mason’s handwriting.
“I don’t even know how to start a letter, so don’t laugh at me. 
I’m so sorry about last night. I would never do something to hurt you like I did last night. Your feelings are more important to me than her or anybody else. I’m sorry for getting defensive last night, you had every right to be mad and I shouldn’t have said what I said, it was low of me. 
You’re my friend and I owe you this apology. Sometimes I wish we were more than that. I wish it had been you I was kissing. I wish you would feel the same way. But if that is not the case then, being your friend and being by your side is enough.
Love,
Mase”
“What does it say?” Aliyah said, curious as to why it left you speechless. 
“He…he has feelings for me” you said in disbelief, almost tearing up again, not looking up. 
“y/n! I told you! I fucking told you! Wow I’m like a genius at reading people” Aliyah was proud of herself. 
You tilt your head up to look at her, with tears brimming your eyes. 
“No, no, no. We are not doing this again. You are not going to cry. You are going to get ready, go to his place and talk to him and tell him you feel the same way.” 
“But-“ you tried to say. 
“Nope, I don’t care, c’mon get up.” Aliyah said pulling your hand so you would get up her bed. 
“But I said something hurtful-“ 
“And he did too, okay? You both did, and you will work It out. Try and work it out.” 
That was exactly what you needed to hear. You left her bedroom to go get ready and drive to Mason’s place. 
Once you put on a hoodie, shoes and got your purse and keys you were heading to Meson’s house. The drive to his house was a bit long, making you start overthinking everything. Maybe this seemed like a good idea 20 minutes ago, but now? What if he’s hurt and you can’t make him forgive you?
You arrived at his house and the nerves started getting bad and settling in your tummy.
You knocked on the door, waiting for him to open up. You heard footsteps approaching the door. There he was, in joggers and a hoodie, with a confused look on his face. 
“What are you doing here?” he asked. 
You hold up the card, again tears forming in your eyes. 
Mason glanced at the card, and then back at you. 
You reached out for him, and he smiled. He grabbed you by the waist and pulled you into a hug. You both stayed there hugging for what felt like forever. You were crying, again. “Fuck, this like the 3rd time I’m crying today.” You said sniffing, making Mason giggle. 
He pulled away, letting you into his house. 
He grabbed your hand and took you to the living room. Both of you sat down and turned slightly so you could look at each other. 
“I’m sorry Mase-“
“Don’t, you don’t have to apologize.  I kind of deserved that either way.” He said cutting you off. 
“Doesn’t mean I’m still not sorry about it.” You said wiping the remaining tears on your cheeks. 
“Why didn’t you tell me you had feelings for me, Mase?” you asked. 
“I feared being rejected by you. I didn’t want to risk losing our friendship. I was scared that if by some miracle you did feel the same way, my lifestyle would be too much, and it wouldn’t work. I was scared by a lot of things. I also, I feel like you sometimes pushed me away a bit. And as for last night, I was trying to be a good wingman to Woody and it backfired so hard. I just froze when she started getting closer to me.” He said not looking at you, almost as if he was ashamed about it. 
“I forgive you.” You said, grabbing his hand. 
“Mase, I always had feelings for you. I pushed you away because I knew if I didn’t, I would just be falling more and more for you. I was also scared of you rejecting me. You know, you are who you are and have this amazing life and everyone loves you, and I’m just me. I didn’t think you would ever feel the same way about me.” You said choking up. 
“We really need to communicate better, fucking hell.” He said, making you both giggle. 
He placed a hand on your cheek, caressing it with his thumb. 
“How can I not fall for you?” he said whispering. 
Your heart melted and just leaned your head against his palm making him smile. “I’m too awkward to even admit all of this to you.” You said smiling. He chuckled. 
He started leaning in more and more, your noses bumping into each other. You finally closed the gap between you both and kissed him. 
You had always imagined this moment. Ever since you met him, and so did he. 
Your lips were moving in sync and it was the best feeling in the world. You didn’t want it to end. You both pulled away and rested your forehead together. 
“You know I wish you would see yourself the way I see you.” He said whispering. 
“Mase…” you said, almost tearing up again. 
“Don’t bring the water falls again,” he said giggling. 
You both embraced each other the whole night. Explaining everything that had happened the night before and that same morning. 
“I don’t want to ruin the moment.” You said looking up at him. 
“Oh uh…” Mason replied, looking down at you. 
“I should talk to Nicolas Mase. I owe it to him.” You said afraid of what he would think. 
Mason thought about it for a second. As much as he didn’t like him, he knew you were right. On the positive side Nicolas would know it was him you wanted and not Nicolas. 
“Can I ask you something?” Mason said not looking at you. 
“Yes of course.” “Did you ever had feelings for him?”, you chuckled at Mason’s jealousness. “No Mase, never.” You got up a bit to be face to face, and gave him a little kiss to assure him you never did. 
“I promise, I just need him to know how I feel about you and to say sorry if he thought there was something else between him and I.” 
“I know, I trust you.” He said, looking at you now. 
“But that can wait,” he got up from the sofa, and reached his hand out for you. 
“Stay here today, with me?”  he asked, giving you puppy eyes. 
“Okay you said smiling.” 
Both of you got ready for bed, he had given you one of his t-shirts and boxers for you to sleep in. 
Before falling asleep and getting into bed with him, you gave a quick text to Aliyah.
You both got under the covers and cuddled each other. The night was filled with kisses, Mason whispering sweet things, and you blushing. This was heaven for both of you, and what you had craved for so long. 
491 notes · View notes
jingsyuans · 11 months
Text
Hugging Jing Yuan
. a/n: lol this isn’t very good because I wrote it for Me because I want to hug him. Goodbye
He’s noticed the question that never quite makes it way out while you’re at work. Your hesitation
The way you often put your hands on your hips or cross your arms against yourself when you hesitate
Clearly, you want something. Jing Yuan just can’t quite figure out what it is. One of the things he strives for at work is to know his subordinates and what they need, what he can give.
He’s a nice man in that way. He likes to give people that work with him at the Seat of Divine Foresight undivided attention every once in awhile ; because sometimes people need that. To look at someone in the eye, even if it’s him, and be an individual for a little while
Usually they’re reserved, because Jing Yuan is the ‘boss’ after all, no matter how much he reassures them that as long as they’re not in battle, there’s no need to be shy. He’s communicated this same thing to you, and you’re yet to take full advantage of it, like everyone else
But he’s determined. Seeking you out throughout the day with that calculating look in his eye, trying to figure out what that lingering question is that sits on your tongue.
It’s only a matter of time until you sigh, letting him win. Shuffling your feet as you suddenly look embarrassed.
‘All I really want is … to …’ the words are strained and shy. ‘Hug. Somebody. Anybody.’
Of course your answer surprises him
He didn’t think it would be something so simple, so… humane. He tries to think of the last time he actually hugged someone himself, and he’s surprised that he comes up short in his memory
So he offers. ‘Would you mind if I volunteered?’ He asks, smile on his face as he watches you frantically shake your head. As expected.
‘You really don’t need to do that, general-‘
‘Well, it’s not just for you,’ he teases, wanting to take a step closer to you but respecting your boundaries and staying firm in his spot. ‘I think it would be nice. There’s no need to hold back.’
You’re clearly thinking his offer over, hesitation written all over you. But you must be desperate, must be lonely, because soon enough you’re taking the step forward and wrapping your arms around your general’s middle.
He reciprocates in kind, hands staying in appropriate places. Usually, a hug only lasts a few seconds- but that’s not really what you need and he knows that. Jing Yuan squeezes you lightly, pressing you into him, softly persuading you to relax the tension of your body. Let go.
And you do. Your cheek pressed against his chest, you hug Jing Yuan close and squeeze him close. A soft breath leaving you as you soak in every inch of the affection he’s offered.
And Jing Yuan… never realized how nice an embrace could be, how long he’s gone without it. The longer you both stay together, the harder it is to convince himself to part. Sleepy sort of man that he is, he could easily doze off with the comfort of another against him. Even if the two of you are still standing.
Of course, he is still your boss. Eventually, for practical and appropriate reasons, he has to let go. When he takes a step back and loosens his grip, you break out of your reverie and follow his lead, putting space between the two of you.
He’s… surprised by how quickly you changed. The air around you lighter, eyes happier and your stance more relaxed than before. ‘Thank you, Jing Yuan,’ you tell him genuinely. ‘I needed that.’
Of course. He nods you off and you both continue your day, maybe feeling a little bit warmer than before. Jing Yuan continues his work at his desk, his mind a bit more clear than it was earlier, much to his surprise
Maybe he needed that, too.
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