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#i never thought a friendship could be practically subtext but
greypetrel · 1 year
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Hi! c: From the Wholesome Ask Meme, 4, 9, 12, 30 for Aisling :D
Hello! :D Thanks for the ask, sorry too for being late but it was very late and the questions were long xD (and the light was shit for doodles and I really wanted to draw the flowers one)
4. What is the thing they like the most about their friends and what is the thing their friends like the most about them?
For her about her friends is generally speaking people being passionate about their interests and showing that passion, whether it's something she has some interest into or not. Could be something she likes or not. Would stay hours hearing Solas talking of this or that memory "he saw in the Fade", or Dorian of speaking of whatever weird idea he's thought this particular morning (thus weird experiments are born, he launches an idea, she suggests how it can be done in practice. Everyone in Skyhold braces themselves and hope they won't decide to experiment on explosives today). Or Sera and her weird theories, she never frankly thought much about human society, but she talked so much and with so much emphasis that she'll eventually join the Red Jennies herself (Spoiler?). As well as listening on while Cullen speaks about chess even if she doesn't particularly like the game. And, she tends to bond and appreciate kindness towards others, and people acting emotional. She'll hate Orlais -save for the baking, she'll swoon for those cakes-, and will never make friends with Vivienne because even if she can understand why she behaves like that, she respect her abilities and intelligence, she just can't accept her trampling over other people's feelings with words like that. The "Keep your pet demon at bay" said to Cole? She became RABID.
On the contrary, she's liked because she's kind and a good listener. She tends to make questions that are pinpointed and very precise over any issue, going straight to the point. But, she can listen, keep a secret and offer support and not solutions.
9. How would they react if a person they love (friends and family included) gave them a flower bouquet unexpectedly?
Ok, let me tell you. She's always been the one who fell first and has to court her love interests, and has not much experience in flirting and getting into a relationship. Fell first for her long-term girlfriend, the WHOLE clan knew -love interest included, it was very embarrassing and it went on for 3 years before they eventually got together. She's used to be the one to give and do things for the other, so I can imagine that before they actually got together and she just read it as "friendship"…
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And then, when the relationship is established and she knows there's a romantic subtext…
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(when she reached out to confess, she was absolutely sure it was one-sided and that she fell first, yes.)
12. What is their safe place? And what does “safe place” mean to them?
Ok, for her this is kinda difficult. As a Dalish, the "safe place" is not a material one. More than that, she spent most of her childhood feeling constantly out of place and "the one that got adopted" with the Lavellans, no matter how much love and care they showed. She registered it, was very grateful, learnt like that that kindness is the most important thing. Still, she kept feeling she had something to prove to them to show she really belonged, put all that much effort into studying and being a good First because she felt she had to earn her place. She equals "Safe place" with either actions that relaxes her when she can do them freely, like treating Elfroot or stargazing or spend hours with hallas/horses/weird mounts she finds around Thedas and adopted for the joy of Master Dennet; or people, she's at home everywhere if there are people she loves and can be herself without masking with.
30. What is their love language?
TOUCH. She's touchy-feely, the annoying person who absent-mindedly reaches out and look for contact when she's speaking with you, if she likes you. Will hug you, hold your hand, pat your shoulder and just sit close so you touch even in friendship, will fuss over you, even platonically. She's the one that goes around conventions with the sign "Free hugs".
Romantically, it's just less casual and more searched for. Popping back out this (I'm planning on colours and maybe a digital clean up) because it well explains it. Also, I found the most simple solution to the weird sitting situation: when in doubt, the desk always comes for help.
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And, a mix of acts of services and quality time.
The one she reacts the worst to is Words of affirmation (Solas: "You're not like other girls." Aisling: "… Thank you I guess…?
This is the ask list!
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Hi! There's a non-xanon polyam ship I thought I'd write about and send to you and share since your blog's all about discussion of polyam in media.
The series The Big Bang Theory has a practically canon ship: Raj, Bernadette and Howard. Howard and Bernadette are married, Raj and Bernadette are ship-teased and Howard and Raj get a billion gay jokes.
They honestly are SUCH a throuple.
I have a LOT of problems with TBBT, a LOT. Toxic masculinity, racism, misogyny, queerphobia, ableism...
But it's entertaining and I still want to at least acknowledge this ship.
What's really dissapointing is that the series, like many, constantly jokes about characters being LGBTQ+ (Amy's bisexuality, Howard and Raj...) to the extent that it only isn't canin because it's "obviously" just jokes because gay so funny.
And it would have been so EASY to commit to the joke and ACTUALLY have LGBTQ+ characters. They wouldn't have had to write ANYTHING differently or hire new writers, literally just have the show exactly as it is... But make the gayness canon. Some good could have come out of that problematic show... But nope. And it is SUCH a missed opportunity.
And, back to Howard and Raj, them being a throuple woukd have worked REALLY well.
One of Raj's main traits was wanting love and hating being single, and his romances always failing. The 3 of them being together would have fixed that. He would have a fufilling relationship with a woman he loves and Howard, the character he's shown to be tye closest to. It's literally perfect. AND THEY ROBBED HIM OF IT-
It's rather frustrating that the writers were clearly lazy bigots, and couldn't bother to actually follow through on the jokes and rather blatant threesome subtext...
Anti-woke ppl often criticise representation bevause it's some huge deal and would ruin everything... But... It's not.
If they'd made it canon, it wouldn't have changed the characters or the dynamics at all, it wouldn't have been a big deal. The reason it's made into a big deal is because a lot of ppl think rep = entire character focus and narratives about issues, and don't understand "casual representation". Casual rep in TBBT coukd have existed, but tye writers wasted that opportunity. I could go on about how much Raj/Howard/Bernadette make sense and how it could habe been signgificant rep given how popular the series was...
Also quick shout-out to the lowkey non-monogamous vibes of Amy dating Sheldon and crushing on Penny (she literally imagined Penny/Sheldon fanfic in one scene) who's dating Leonard.
Anyway, so that's about it. Your blog is all about poltam ships and I wanted to share one I personally love tho I have a LOT of issues with the source material lol
i never expected big bang theory asks but i can see ur point and i think ur right the writers are cowards. thank u for rambling to me about this i love reading yalls takes on polyships and stuff
and hey maybe theres someone reading this who agrees w u and more friendship could blossom in powerpolyculeshowdown which is my new goal here tbh i want ppl to get along and have a good time
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ranger-kellyn · 4 months
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Getaway Car WIP 4
reading through my nano doc trying to get back into the thought of working on this again. i thought i wasn't going to write another world tournament chapter, but then i realized i could have all kinds of fun exploring the emotional aftermath of letting diantha be a little petty. as a treat. :)c
there is a small skip note towards the bottom bc it's a nanowrimo draft but ¯_(ツ)_/¯ wygd
-- -- -- --
Elesa dragged Burgh with her over to one of the tunnel’s lights, needing better sight to get his mic pack back in place.  A light that was probably out of earshot.  
Diantha knew an opportunity when she saw one.
She could play mind games with the best of psychic specialists.  
“By the way,” she began, keeping her voice casual.  “I’ve been meaning to tell you that your villa in Undella is absolutely stunning.” It certainly wasn’t a lie.  
Caitlin’s head tilted to the side, as if lost in thought.  “Thank you,” she said, tone unreadable to Diantha.  “Forgive me– did I ever rent to you?  It would have slipped my mind if you had a filming company reach out to me,” she continued.  
She might have been fishing for context, but Diantha was going to snag her line with nothing but subtext.  
She shook her head.  “No, Cynthia has had me over quite a bit while we’ve been filming the past few months.  You have impeccable taste,” she said. 
Caitlin hummed, carefully studying her features.  “You’re too kind.” 
“And this is probably a silly compliment, but Cynthia said you had the bathroom remodeled, and it absolutely shows.  Only a tall woman would know to refit it with a bathtub that would be enough to actually soak in.  Practically big enough for two people,” she continued. 
She didn’t miss the way Burgh and Elesa had both stopped talking at their end of the hall.  They were clearly listening in, but she couldn't be bothered to care. 
She also didn’t miss the very subtle raised brows from Caitlin.  “I do try.” 
“And don’t get me started on that bedroom.  The way you can watch both sunrise and sunset– absolutely stunning,” she said, lowering her voice just enough to hopefully keep at least Burgh from overhearing.  “Can’t say I’ve ever had a bad morning waking up in that bed.”  
“The main reason I picked that particular villa,” Caitlin said with an edge to her tone. 
Forgoing any other compliments, Diantha instead aimed straight for her jugular.  The true ace she had been waiting to play.  “In some ways I know Cynthia and I have the film to thank for giving us a chance to be friends, but that lanai of yours.”  She paused, a small shake of her head.  “Can’t tell you how many hours we’ve spent out there just chatting and enjoying one another’s company.   I think I really do have you to thank for our–” It was an intentional pause.  Just long enough to make Caitlin dig her fingers into her arms, smothering any reaction.  “Friendship.” 
“Always happy to help Cynthia branch out,” she said.  
Diantha didn’t have to be a psychic specialist to know she had gotten completely under her skin.  The look of utter disdain–  
In some ways, Diantha had never been so eager to make an enemy for herself…but then again, it wasn’t entirely fair to call Caitlin an enemy.  Enemy would have implied she was even a player in the game– and judging by Cynthia’s own obliviousness to her affections…she wasn’t even a contender.  
“Field’s all set!” the assistant yelled from the back end of the hallway.  
Diantha smiled at Caitlin, in truly what was her best and most well rehearsed shit-eating grin.  “See you on the field, darling!” 
Elesa was quick to catch up to her, pulling her along the underground hallway so they could make their way to the other side of the field.  “Oh my god–” she began once she was sure they were at least out of earshot of Burgh and Caitlin. 
Just as quickly as she had been reveling in the satisfaction of it all, the realization of what exactly she had done crashed over her.  Anxiety clawed up her neck, marring her face and shoulders in hot shame.  
Elesa paid no mind.  “You know– I even fucking had the thought, and I almost even said something to Skyla!”  She said, laughing through talking.  “But then I was like, ‘No, I’m not gonna do that to Diantha! I’m sure she gets enough shit as it is with being accused of dating everyone she goes near’ but like! Oh my god!”  They had finally reached their end of the tunnel, still a few minutes to spare before they would be called onto the field.  
Diantha just hoped that none of the tunnel security cameras captured too much audio. 
“I have never seen anyone actually shut Caitlin down like that before– are you two fucking or what?!” she asked with the biggest grin.  
The heat had yet to leave her face, and she was sure it was showing even though her makeup.  “That was highly unprofessional of me.”  As though she wasn’t literally the champion of another league that was in the same alliance–
Elesa stopped her spiraling in her tracks.  “Oh, uh-uh, shove it!  That was hot!”  She said it so matter of factly, it could only make Diantha laugh.  “And like– look, if I’m being nosey, tell me to back off I’ll get it, no hard feelings– but I wanna be nosey.  Are you two, like, together-together?” she asked.  
Had it been practically anybody other than Elesa, she would have kept her mouth shut.  However, it was Elesa. While not an actress, she was someone who dealt with a similar level of public scrutiny.  Someone who likely understood all the varying ways her hands were tied.  
“We’ve been…” She wasn’t even sure how to really describe it all.  “Casual up to this point, but…” She grimaced.  “That wasn’t exactly a casual reaction, was it?” she asked.  
Elesa snorted a laugh.  “Was gonna say,” she teased. 
Diantha shook her head, crossing her arms.  “We were going to talk about it today, but– then we were asked to join this, and from the moment she called Cynthia to invite her I’ve been worked up, and…” She shook her head again, forcing herself to drop her shoulders to release all the tension that had built up. 
Elesa nodded.  “Hey– look, I get it.  Caitlin isn’t subtle, she’s never been subtle– but it’s also Cynthia.  This isn’t a knock against her at all, but like– it’s Cynthia.  I know I’ve watched people throw themselves at her left and fucking right.  It’s not easy being with someone like that– trust me.  Talk to Skyla.  It’s something we’ve been working with…” 
[fill in rest of convo later]
“I'm warning you now, Elesa– I will be sending out Gardevoir up front,” Diantha said, getting a harder laugh from her.  
“I’m about to start crying– oh my god– I had no clue you were like this! I am living for this!”  She sifted through her poké balls, holding up the green and yellow capsule.  “If you’re going for the petty angle of beating the psychic specialist with a psychic pokémon, then I’m joining you and beating the bug specialist with my own bug!” 
Her Galvantula. 
Diantha grinned.  “See, this is why I’m glad you and I partnered together.  I’m glad I didn’t even have to explain that to you.” 
Elesa pulled her in by the shoulder.  “Let’s kick ass, babe!”
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kyrodo · 27 days
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I found there is a nitw 2. I do realize how stupid and mindless my head canon was back then but it's clear now Choskey makes a way better Gregg than Ronnie. He's a prankster by nature and loves cracking jokes and doing random things with someone. With the added benefit of being completely enamored with everything about me all the way down to being heavily aroused by my voice. An Ace who's being driven to the brink of wanting me to do anything to them. The added benefit of not being a toxic asshole who snaps and lies whenever they please without warning. So ready to fix a target to everyone they know whether it's truthful or justified.
I instead have someone I can actually communicate with, someone I can love so fully and so completely where the slightest inquiry isn't enough to completely set them off. Who actually talks things out who actually makes sense. Despite his legitimate difficulties he has with verbal and written communication and word choices, he still makes a genuine effort to do so. He doesn't treat everyone he meets like total ass. And even if he doesn't get along with someone he doesn't go after them.
I can't think of any other time in my life where every single one of someone's actions have been so clearly driven out of spite and intense distrust that so clearly betrays all practical thought. I have not forgotten my stabs in the dark my passive aggressive monologues against said person that also often pushed into imaginative extremes. My own version of sensationalizing someone's actions, though my portrayals were rarely that far when I was all too often reiterating the events that took place.
Seeking every potential metaphor, making every possible obscure reference while still making it easy to follow for the person that was reading between the lines. I do wish I had stopped trying when things were already clearly over but I could not find it in me to let go. I wanted so badly for such intense feelings and thought to not fall flat, for everything that happened to have some kind of lasting meaning through friendship or otherwise. It was too disappointing, it was too deep a fall and too harsh pain that I was not ready for. It felt so sad, so tragic and a part of me still deeply wished even after all the times I felt I had thoroughly shat on any possibility of us having a connection that I still wanted to try anyway.
And I knew each time it was already over but I couldn't accept it. Not after it seemed like our lives could completely change if we did connect, and most likely for the better at least for me. And I wanted that so badly I wanted my feelings to not be for naught. That basic thought kept me going, even after all the pitiable self digging that I perceived would keep them from ever wanting me in their life. All I really did was make myself an easy target. I was self destructive enough at the time that even if the thought occurred it wouldn't have mattered. I was self destructive but didn't want to take any action that would get me to lose Red. Instead I flirted with the possibility, of poly if nothing else so I could still feel hopeful.
I couldn't choose even if they had been 100% willing to go for it, that was the first time I'd ever been that close to actually considering an additional to our relationship seriously. I was not ready to confront Red about it. We hadn't done anything together, we could barely hold a conversation. We never got the chance to play anything or hop onto discord. So I wouldn't have been able to make a good case anyway if I did talk to Red about anything because everything was subtext and subtext is not fact and not a good talking point.
I feel that if we had at least gone further to the point we could actually sit down and talk or play anything that we could have gotten there but every attempt to do so was met with another underhanded attack. And I don't know why beyond my rants and my clear depression and anxiety evident in my words and actions. It would have been so easy I felt for things to have improved but those efforts always fell flat for reasons unknown.
If we could have just been friends I felt that would have been enough to keep me happy.
I get Choskey. Choskey is the very essence of love and excitement and mutual approval and affection. So much so that even Red's romantic sing and dance has been put to shame. He so clearly enjoys being around me and I felt like even back then it would have been possible with Ronnie too if he wasn't a complete asshole. I know many parts of me have improved since then, but the fact that I am me hasn't changed.
I can only point to the circumstances of our meeting. Vrchat we see each other, we hear each other before we even get to discord or anything, we get to do stuff together without having to slide into dms or something. Being a raving lunatic in the midst of depression on Twitter however doesn't make for a great first impression. In the vrc days I had gotten over everything, I'm lucid I'm calm I'm supportive. And that already defines completely different environments for both encounters. So much so that even without Choskey clearly having a less reproachful personality things still would have undeniably gone better. Because I'm not a rando this time. I'm trusted more than anyone else in the world, so much so that I'm the only one he truly shares his kink with. Everything is so clearly turned upside down and it is so easy so natural, so positive and wholesome on a level my ex would never have reached with me in a thousand years. Ironically I became a black cat anyway, just without posing as Mae or anybody. This time I am me and only me. And it was so much easier to tell Red about someone I "actually" met.
And the funniest thing about it all is the first time I was suddenly blown off, you yourself indicated I didn't even do anything that bad. You just do it. You just lie to my face at the slightest breeze, the slightest impulse with no real explanation and it confuses me every single time because the lead up always seems ok. The only stupid games Choskey ever played with me were actual games.
I'm not saying it'll be everyone's gut instinct to side with the one who writes essays insulting them whenever things go wrong, but I seem to recall we didn't start there. You lie to my face and the moment you get confronted about it in even the slightest way it's over. I was pretty damn immature but I wasn't dealing with someone I could be mature with. With every year that goes by the more I shed off your influence the more confident and happy I become. Because the only thing you were ever good for was making me constantly doubt myself. I thrive in a world where I can actually say what I mean to say. But the only world I can do that is one where you aren't around.
I could only be so meticulous about my words when I was by myself because it was the only time you ever acknowledged their meaning. The only time we would ever be on the same page. And that stressed me out so much and I'm so glad you're over. I feel like anybody else in my position wouldn't have been hurt for this long,but I felt it. I overcame an overwhelming amount of nervousness every time we directly interacted. And it was always somehow worse than I imagined it would go. And it's only because it was you. I wish so much that literally anybody else had taken your role. Because nobody else does what you do. Nobody else gaslights so damn hard, everybody else doesn't snap when they actually have to say something real. Anybody else would have been willing to acknowledge everything and talk about it. But with you it's always the stupid way or no way. You claim it's easy, that anybody could talk to you. But I'm the only exception you and never explain why. At any point you could have put a stop to things and actually tried to talk everything out with me but you always chose to watch me suffer. Every time you had the chance to, you cut me off.
And I'm always observing how everyone can just reply to you without any strings attached but I'm always forced to talk sideways or you'll pretend it never happened and want nothing to do with me. And I kept wondering if there would ever be a day that we could. I never wanted something so basic so badly. And now I finally get a second friend/love interest that I can actually take at face value for once.
And yes it's kinda sad that I need a 2 in the first place but If I let Red continue to run things we would die on an abandoned mountain somewhere away from all signs of social life, besides his dysfunctional family. And I don't want to waste the rest of my life that way.
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wonderfullyalone · 3 years
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you think your life is hard? i’m emotionally invested in kaz and jesper’s friendship
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fairymascot · 3 years
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when i started watching harley quinn TV, about the last thing i expected of it was to be feminist in any way. i mean, it's an adult comedy cartoon. it's based on 2016 suicide squad's take on harley. the poor woman doesn't even wear any pants. but man, the more i think about it, and the more i consume other dc content featuring those characters, the more appreciative i am of its takes on its female cast.
let's talk about ivy. i watched the btas episode 'house and garden' today, and was honestly appalled by how blatantly male it all felt. in this episode, ivy 'rehabitilates' herself by getting released from arkham, marrying her therapist (which nobody even pointed out is illegal?!), taking care of his two kids from a previous marriage, and basically living the perfect suburban housewife dream. when batman suspects she's up to some shit, she tells him she's never been happier, and no longer has any need for crime. of course it turns out to be an elaborate ruse, but the ending reveals that she wasn't completely insincere -- she does, in fact, dream of having a husband and children, something she cannot accomplish due to the infertility caused by her powers.
unfortunately, this episode must have had a serious impact on ivy's characterization, as the book 'cycle of life and death' from 2016 is heavily founded on it. in my humble opinion, it's terrible. i mean, i get it, it was the nineties and written by men, and tv writers only really started picking up on how to write women as complex multilayered beings in recent years, but damn.
ivy's original character is already rooted in a very male, distorted perception of women. she's a textbook femme fatale-- she's dainty, gorgeous, scantily clad, and her powers are seducing men into doing her bidding. and to pile further on top of her misogynistic foundation, the only way they could think to humanize her is by forcing more of their stereotypical male perception onto her-- how do we show she's a sympathetic character? by making her deep down a 'normal woman', who has normal woman dreams of being a housewife with children. the rather blatant subtext that she turned to a life of villainy because her infertility denied her that dream -- a failed woman that has turned into a despicable monster -- only makes this depiction all the uglier. i'm actually amazed this take on her character managed to survive all the way to 2016.
but then you have hqtv ivy, who takes all that and unceremoniously dumps it in the trash. it rethinks the basics of ivy's personality and attitude from the ground up. she's a misanthrope -- the only company she seeks outside of her plants is harley -- why would she make a villain career out of seducing men? why does she have to be sensual and coy? no. instead, she's awkward, stoic, and anti social. she dresses a whole hell of a lot more practical, she's blunt to a fault, and wastes none of her time trying to appeal to men.
the sexual element of her powers has been removed, or at the very least severely limited-- no more poison kisses or seducing men to do her bidding. the only scene that incorporates that element at all is when she has to peck a bunch of dweeby 12 year old boys on the mouth to reverse the effect of her toxin that's been slipped into their bar mitzvah punch bowl by mistake. it's ridiculous, it's absolutely mortifying for her, and it's funny. nothing about it is remotely sexy.
as for her dreams of becoming a housewife... well, ivy very clearly doesn't know what she wants for her future. or rather, she's so repressed that she doesn't allow herself to want. she always saw herself ecoterroristing it up solo-- but then harley happened, and she found herself going soft, and opening up to other people through harley's influence as well. she allows herself to acknowledge that she's lonely, and that she does crave human connection. specifically, she craves harley -- but that's a part of her she had to seal away, out of fear of ruining their friendship. this leads her to pursue a relationship with kite man (or rather: be pursued by him), even though at every step of the way she pretty obviously has to force herself farther into it.
it's not that she doesn't like kite man. the opposite. she can tell he's a good guy, he treats her so well, he cares for her so deeply. for someone like ivy, coming from a life of abuse and isolation, that's rarer than rare. and that's why she forces herself to overlook all their differences, all the aspects of their relationship that clearly aren't working, and clings on to it regardless. finally, someone genuinely wants her, cares about her. she'd have to be stupid to let that go, right?
but she doesn't want it. that's spelled out the most blatantly on their wedding day-- while he's reciting his dream future of them living in a nice house with a white picket fence, a dog and three kids, ivy is horrified. unlike btas' ivy, who would've surely been delighted, it's completely removed from anything this version of ivy ever wanted for herself. and in that moment, she realizes she fucked up. she locked herself into a life she never wanted because she thought it was the best she could hope to get.
and then their wedding goes up in literal flames, kite man calls it quits, and ivy finally lets herself pursue what she really, truly wants: harley.
it's such a great, fresh take on ivy's character. she's written as a woman, but not some male writer's narrow view of one, but an actual honest, human woman. her struggles and insecurities are incredibly relatable to me as a female viewer, because she's allowed to breathe and grow and have depth outside of the list of stereotypes female characters are so often shoehorned into. she's aloof, she's cynical, she's a loner; she's carrying years of trauma that's made her insecure and closed off, and she's just starting to grow past that; she's desperate for love but forces herself to settle for tepid affection because she's too scared to pursue anything more; she's a genius biochemist and a badass with the power to control all of plant life, but she's fucking chickenshit and wishy-washy and doesn't know how to be honest with her feelings, leading her to hurt those she cares about. and the fact that they took btas' ivy's dream of getting married and having a family, and used it as a stepping stone-- subverted it as part of ivy's self-realization and growth-- that's just the icing on the cake.
hqtv ivy is hands down the best take of this character i've seen to date. god bless, i cannot wait for season 3.
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lovely-v · 3 years
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LOTR (films) Review
So I finally watched the LOTR films (20 years later). I’m super excited to review these because I read the books very recently so I feel at least a little prepared to voice some opinions. Overall I loved the films, here’s a very long (but by no means exhaustive) compilation of my thoughts, which are of course, totally subjective:
(Warning: a lot of me saying “well, actually, in the book...”)
THINGS I LIKED
- Casting! not much to say here, I thought the casting was great. One of my favorite actors that I didn’t think i’d have a huge opinion on was David Wenham as Faramir. I was kinda ambivalent on him when I saw pictures but i thought he did a great job. he showed his quality.
- Music. so much has been said about the films on the music front. I can’t offer too much original insight but when a bit of the Shire theme started to play as Frodo tries to make his way up Mount Doom I cried a little.
- Boromir and Aragorn. I liked the scene where they interact a little in Rivendell. I also like how Aragorn saves Boromir in the Moria battle and gives him this little nod of friendship. I think the films did a great job portraying the dynamic they have where Aragorn is clearly suspicious of Boromir’s motivations but grows to respect him to the point where he doesn’t even blame Boromir for being corrupted by the ring because he understands that, at heart, Boromir is a good person. 
- Sam and Frodo in Osgiliath. I expected to be kind of annoyed with the way this plot point played out (I knew ahead of time that it strayed from the book), but I actually liked it a lot. As I’ll say later, there’s some gripes I have with the way the films extremely play up the disagreements between Frodo and Sam, but I loved the scene where Frodo pulls the sword on Sam and then seems so defeated when he realizes what he’s done. I was pleasantly surprised by how emotional this scene made me. It’s admittedly A Lot, but it was done nicely, especially in conjunction with Sam’s “there’s good in this world” speech.
- Treatment of the ending. I almost think I should dislike the ending as it is in the movies, but my heart is soft and I like that they sugarcoated it a bit. I know the whole point of the Scouring of the Shire and Frodo’s depression conveys a lot about war and trauma and I think that is important, but after watching these things for twelve hours I just wanted Frodo & co. to be happy and I was kinda relieved that they cut the Scouring. Does that make me weak and perhaps bad at film analysis? yes. do I care? no. I was also very glad that the movies didn’t portray how depressed Sam was about losing Frodo in the end. Yes, he cries, but when he walks home to his family he seems happy and in the books that scene came off so much bleaker. I definitely liked the lighter tone.
THINGS I WAS NEUTRAL ON/DIDN’T LIKE
- Arwen. (Neutral) I don’t hate her, I don’t love her. I think the story she and Aragorn have is compelling and I 100% get why the filmmakers decided to add it to give her character more depth, but it felt misplaced at times. maybe it’s just because it was the only storyline I didn’t know in depth, but the scenes with the Arwen/Aragorn flashbacks felt a bit confusing and disorienting. Don’t have anything against Arwen as a character though, I think she’s pretty alright.
- Gimli. (Complicated thoughts) I want to start off by saying I don’t dislike Gimli. I like him a lot! I just think the movies did him a bit dirty. He had some good movie-exclusive moments, but I think his character really fell into this place of being the butt of too many jokes. Would have liked to see some more serious Gimli development, especially with his relationship to Legolas. Their friendship felt too much like subtext here, whereas it’s explored far more in the books.
- Two Towers Pacing. (Didn’t really like). The pacing of TTT was...weird. maybe I’m going into this with a closed mind because of the books, but it was odd to have the movie begin with Frodo and Sam and then have them only appear for a few rapid scenes after that. I think the fact that a WHOLE LOT of what happens to Frodo and Sam in TTT is moved to RotK is what makes it feel that way? In the books, Two Towers ends with Sam discovering that Frodo isn’t dead from Shelob’s sting, and I was surprised by how long it took the movies to get to that part. However, I will give the films a little leeway because I think they needed Frodo & Sam content for RotK, since most of what happens in that book is them walking through Mordor basically starving and dying. Doesn’t make for great cinema I guess, so they had to put the whole Shelob/Cirith Ungol saga into the final film. Still, I think there’s a weird lack of Frodo and Sam’s presence in TTT.
- The go home/missing bread arc. (Full of rage abt this one) yeah. so. my criticism of this is gonna sound pretty tired because people complain and complain about this part of RotK. but I’m gonna complain some more!! I don’t think the split between Frodo and Sam does anything for the plot. I really don’t. I guess it emphasizes the fact that Sam doesn’t understand how much Frodo is projecting onto Gollum, but it’s just. unnecessary angst? They had enough angst in the Osgiliath scene! Which I actually liked! And it simply doesn’t make a lot of sense for Frodo to suspect Sam of eating the bread when Sam had already offered Frodo his own food and made it clear that he would very much starve if it meant making sure Frodo could eat. But what I hate most about this scene is not that Frodo gets mad and tells Sam to go home. No. It’s that Sam actually... thinks about doing that? he actually? goes down the staircase? emotionally this is bad because Sam clearly cared enough about Frodo to follow him this far, to nearly drown for him, so why would he leave now. Practically this is bad because 1. how would Sam get out of Mordor alone and 2. where would he go. He turns around almost immediately, yes, but what was his plan. where was he going. why.
THINGS I LOVED
- For Frodo! This line, and every other shoutout to Frodo. In the books, they didn’t really actively talk about/worry about Frodo (and Sam) as much as they do in the movies. I like that they talk about Frodo more in the movies! I like that they’re thinking about him! I know it was implied that they were in the books, but I really like how it’s shown here. I think it gave a more complete picture of how much they all care about him on a personal level in addition to just needing him to succeed from a pragmatic standpoint. 
- Merry and Pippin! I feel like Merry and Pippin were so well rounded in the films. I’ve heard criticism about them being turned into comic relief characters (which they always were a little bit) but it honestly didn’t feel that way to me. They had a bit of a rough start because the films didn’t make their motives for going with Frodo as deep as the books did, but I think that by TTT they were absolutely amazing characters in every scene. In RotK their respective arcs hit really well and the scene where Pippin is singing to Denethor? *chef’s kiss* poetic. beautiful. sad. idk man I just feel like I have such a newfound appreciation for Merry and Pippin.
- Parallels! people have pointed out the parallel of Frodo and Sam’s hands before (drowning scene/mount doom scene) and I love how the movie did that. Just stunning. Also! The moving of the Smeagol & Deagol scene to RotK surprised me because in the books it was like,,,at the beginning of Fellowship, but I think the placement of it in the movies really helped emphasize the similarities between Smeagol & Deagol and Frodo & Sam (and how much Frodo fears this similarity.) There were a lot of other well done parallels between storylines and a few bits of dialogue that were repeated with great timing, but I can’t remember all of them at the moment.  
Edit: here’s one I remembered! when Frodo wakes up after being rescued and sees Gandalf, he says Gandalf’s name in a very similar tone to the one he used at the very beginning of Fellowship. It was a nice little subtle connection.
- I can’t carry it for you...alright this is self-indulgent. everyone knows I love this line. I’m just so glad it made it into the movie intact. Sean Astin’s delivery was amazing. I cheered. My mom cheered. It’s a raw line and it makes me feel secret emotions...like if shrimp colors were feelings. that line makes me feel shrimp feelings. idk i’m so tired i just watched twelve hours of movies this review is decreasing in quality by the minute but i’m about done for now anyway
Various silly afterthoughts
- I would have liked to see Sam kiss Frodo’s hands at least once. This happens 50 thousand times in the books, they could have given me one scene. one little extended edition scene. Please Peter Jackson I’m dyin’ out here
- They literally made Gollum so hateable. kinda the point yes, but I was so on board with Sam’s murderous rage. I know why Gollum’s a profoundly complex character, I know why Frodo pities him, I know why murder is bad, but I too would throw hands with that creature. also he literally body shamed Sam so much what was that skdjksdjksd. Sam is lovely. let him commit a small homicide. 
- the scene where merry and pippin drink the tall boy juice (as someone once referred to it in the tags of one of my posts)... not accurate to the books (since they don’t ever drink it with the end goal of getting tall) but so accurate to life. if I found some water that made me taller than my friends? let me at it
- Frodo panicking when he falls into the spider webs. so real bestie. i felt just as panicked watching that. i am terrified of spiders and Elijah Wood did an amazing job doing exactly what i’d do in the situation. yelping a lot and falling down.
- I feel like it’s never stated that Sam’s a gardener (or at least that he’s specifically Frodo’s gardener) until he tells Faramir he is. Did I miss this. Or do they really never say.  are you just meant to know. are you just meant to pick up gardener vibes from him.
*
This has been a very chaotic lotr movie review. Thanks for reading.
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potteresque-ire · 3 years
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Hi, I hope you're doing well! I recently read what you shared RE: the risk of being outed for GG/DD & I appreciate your insight. Would you mind sharing your thoughts on the popularity of The Untamed in China, and the production of other BL dramas given the issues of censorship and cultural perceptions of queerness? If dramas with queer subtext are profitable, are those in power willing to "overlook" the queerness as long as it's done in a way that can be plausibly denied? Thanks for your time!
Happy 2021 Anon! I may not be the most qualified to answer the question about popularity, because I feel these answers can only be discerned at the ground level-- ie, I have to live in China, or have to have followed the the developments on China’s social media since the airing of the series. Because of time limitations, I’ve been satisfying my curiosity about the cultural aspects surrounding The Untamed and BJYX mainly by scouring the internet for news, social commentaries and opinion pieces. This weekend is the first time I do more than observe and interact  directly with fans of the series and the pairings. :)
Re: censorship, and the government’s response to the onslaught of “adapted” BL dramas (“dangai”). Here’s my admittedly still very limited knowledge so far. First of all, I think it’s important to emphasise that there are three censorship issues surrounding these dramas:
1) the original works from which the dramas are adapted, which are often called IP (Intellectual property). These stories are published online, and therefore bypass the censorship board  
2) the queer / BL elements of these works, in word form
3) how the queer / BL elements are handled when they are adapted for TV, which has its own set of censorship rules.
International fans often focus on 2) and 3).  1), however, is the one that I believe has got the most attention from the government — it’s a flaw in the country’s tightly-controlled speech environment. Millennials are avid IP readers; IPs are also very popular among overseas Chinese readers (ie, they can be effective propaganda tools).
I’m not sure if this is common knowledge among its international fandom, but this is something I think all Untamed fans should know:
In 2020 November, the author of MDZS, Mo Xiang Tong Xiu (MXTX) (real name: Yuan Yimei 袁依楣, was sentenced for “illegal business operation (非法經營) ”. The details of the sentence — including if she’s found guilty or not — was not disclosed (Reminder that China isn’t a transparent country). According to insiders, MXTX was sentenced to three years imprisonment, + 400,000 RMB (~61,227 USD) in fines. (Sorry, can’t find a good English link)
(This is yet another example of China’s lack of transparency.) (For reference: the conviction rate in China’s judicial system is 99.93% in China in 2013, and 99.97% in 2018 and 2019.)
News of her arrest first spread in August 2019 (when The Untamed aired). At the time, Jinjiang, the site where her works were hosted, denied being under any investigations related to her. Still, fans continued to be suspicious as MXTX was known to be very good at advertising her works, creating merchandise etc. She hadn’t updated her site since February 2019 and remained quiet through the airing of the Untamed, when most authors would ‘ve said something, especially considering the series’ popularity.
What does it mean by “Illegal business”? Some says it means publishing their works without going through publishing houses. This has been a common practice among IP writers; all publishing houses in China are licensed through the General Administration of Press and Publication  (GAPP) and have the rights to screen / censor / ban and so, to bypass publishing houses is to bypass the censorship apparatus. Some says it is a cover for her selling pornographic material. MXTX isn’t the first BL author to get jail time. Since 2017, there have been, for example, Tian Yi 天一 and Shen Hai Xian Cheng 深海先生. Some are charged for selling pornography, some also for “illegal business operations”. 深海先生 was considered to be the first BL author imprisoned for her work (she got a 4 year sentence). In 天一’s case, the author and the owner of the printing shop both got a 10-year sentence. The cover artists got a 4-year sentence. The internet shop owner who sold the books got ten month sentence. They sold 7000 books total. 
Was it the pornography that hits a nerve of the Chinese government? The queerness in the pornography? The bypassing publishing houses? No one really knows for sure. The co-sentencing of the printer and seller seems to suggest the issue is with the illegal publishing, but that, again, is a common practice. So is writing BL. If no one knows what hits a nerve, it means…no one knows how to avoid it for sure.
What people do know is this: The rights to adapt MXTX’s Tian Guan Ci Fu (天官賜福) into Donghua was sold for 40 million RMB (6.1 million USD) in 2018 July. Her arrest and sentencing have not deterred the airing and popularity of the donghua, or the preparation of the live-action drama. Not only has The Untamed been highly profitable, THE China’s state newspaper, People’s Daily 人民日報 (Overseas version), dedicated an article in praise of the series, which is considered a very high honour. The article focused on the series’ artistic direction and brushed over the dangai element, described LWJ as WWX’s best friend. 
The messages from the state have therefore been mixed and inconsistent. It seems to approve of the TV series but isn’t happy with the source material, which seems to support the hypothesis that as long as the romance in the original work is modified into “socialist brotherhood” (what fans of these dramas calls the modified relationship), the government is okay with these adapted BL series. However, plausible denial from the production team isn’t the same as perception from the audience, and the temporary ban on The Guardian 鎮魂 (2018), which many would call the predecessor of The Untamed as the first popular adapted BL series, seems to suggest that the censorship board would still move to remove the drama from the shelves if the audience decides that the central relationship is queer. As far as I can tell, The Untamed didn’t generate a lot of noise before its airing, and the production team never tried to sell the drama as a thinly veiled BL — in fact, it did the opposite, intentionally or not; the rumour that Wen Qing would be paired with WWX (which, according to the unofficial BTS, seemed to be a backup plan) enraged the book fans, but also provided an impression that the BL element could be completely eliminated from the product. So, when the article from People’s Daily came out within the first few days of the series’s broadcast, it could describe the relationship between LWJ and WWX a simple friendship without irony.
This isn’t true anymore with the adapted BL dramas currently in the works. They are hotly anticipated, and internet is already filled with articles describing their BL element, and the beautiful men who will/may play the leads and what these leads have done in the original IP (that has mostly bypassed the state’s censorship board). The most likely series to challenge The Untamed in terms of popularity, Immortality 皓衣行, is already building its cp (“couple”), and is doing so for both the characters and the actors. Leaked photos not only show the leads touching each other, arranging each other’s costumes etc etc on set, but them wearing couple necklaces and matching brands of clothes off work.
(The title of an article says: even BJYX didn’t do that.)
This strategy works in that it generates buzz, successfully captures the attention (and ire, in some cases) of The Untamed fans who the marketing teams see as the target audience. I’m not sure how well or long the state can tolerate this kind of “advertisements”, however, because the underlying message is this: the “socialist brotherhood” is a joke to fool the censorship board, which isn’t a message a regime so intent on demonstrating its might wants to hear. Assuming that the economic health of c-ent isn’t in such shambles that these dramas are its only hope of avoiding financial ruin, and if I must put in a guess — there have honestly been too many logic-defying policies by the Xi regime to make educated guesses — I’d imagine, after a series or two, one of the well-respected state media will call out on these publicity stunts. Depending on how harsh the critique is (and how well the already aired dramas fare), it may put an at least temporary hold on those that haven’t been aired.
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icecreamkink · 3 years
Text
watched all of the untamed / cql in two weeks after my friend 1 told me abt mdzs a hundred years ago and my friends 2 and 3 tried to get me into cql for like two whole years and there are.
feelings.
very first scene is a very dramatic death in the middle of nightmare battle on sith planet land . i will forget abt it in the next tenish episodes and then will be very surprised when it becomes Extremely Painful
anyway magic flying gays and possession and human sacrifice! we are off to a great start
in retrospect, chaos goblin wei wuxian must have had a blast pretending to be so cRaZy and be as disruptive as he could as mo xuanyu lbr
listen. why is fire always evil coded. cant a magic clan wear red, black and orange and have flame motif while being wholesome?
For Legal Reasons These Are Not Zombies
i wish the politics of the sect were a bit clearer, especially at the beggining when the wen clan had sm power, was wen ruohan the chief cultivator? is that why they were so slow in responding to the attacks? im v confused by the pre yiling patriarch politics
fighting in the roof by the moonlight as way of flirtiiiiiiing. as i understand this is a wuxia/xianxia trope and honestly...... thank u for ur service
slight bullying and being a nuisance in general, as a way of flirting we love to see it
wwx: if i drink on the rooftop, thats not inside the cloud recesses! hmmm check and mate :D lwj: i will fuck u up so help me god   wwx: :0
i lov them
through hell or high water (quite literally) wei wuxian rem ains a trashfire gremlin till the end and i love him with my whole heart
in the pt subs wei wuxian calls jiang cheng a stubborn duck and i dearly wish that had come back
my opinions on almost every character goes from love to hate u - Hmm Me Like U - BABY. ILY. and i am Very Pleased w that. its been a while since i loved such a complete cast so much i think
no really. i WONT go into a detailed rant abt what i love about each of these characters and each of their relationships to each other. but i COULD. 
some lan disciples in the loudest whisper ever: YEAH THATS THE JIN BASTARD MENG YAO HEARD THE GOT SUPER HUMILIATED BY HIS DAD LOL SURE HOPE HE DOESNT TAKE SLIGHTS TO HIS CHARACTER TO HEART
lan xichen, immediately: i must Love him 
being into problematic ppl is in the Lan genetics, we come to realize
wen qing deserves so many awards for so many things but not snapping and just stabbing wen chao is at the top 
that scene at lan qirens class where wwx talks about using resentful energy to fight a violent spirit. exquisite.
 It establishes Good Student lan wangji, wei wuxian as curious and questioning and not afraid of taboo,  lwj sees that wwx is not, in fact, a dumb ass hes just a Dumbass,  shows us the audience (esp. a western audience) how shocking the idea of disrupting the dead/dying and controlling resentful energy actually is,  the theoretical foreshadow arguing, everyone else like ‘shUT UP’,  “and how could you ensure that the resentful energy would obey you and not hurt other?” “well i havent thought that far” and of course, lan qiren just straight up lobbing a hard object at wwx head,. chefs kiss
fellas is it gay to bother the hot rule obessessed nerd from ur school and make drawings of him with flowers in his hair and then hide gay porn in his book to antagonize him and ask him to hold ur hand and be ur friend and talk to him all the time and get him drunk and give him bunnies bc you know he likes them and give him a lantern and always want his attention and dedicate yourself to getting him to smile-
and after all of that wwx rly said oh i Admire him, aksd like yeah we all were there in high school buddy
i have Learned. caves = gay.
 accidental marriage +beint physically tied together with the sacred married ribbon+ gay panic+foreshadowing+bunnies! in the cave (1)
the story abt lan yi and baoshan sanren tho. i would like to see it
early days wen bros pull my heart strings like a guqin 
EVERYTHING about the lantern scene; disaster hets jiang yanli and jin zixuan; how wwx made lwj a bunny lantern. how soft and touched lwj was. wwx gleefully pointing out he was smiling and lwj IMMEDIATELY PULLING HIW SWORD ON HIM LMAO. tragically foreshadowy promises to do right by pepople, living without regrets. lwjs 'oh no do i love him??' face. just. all of it. 
i have it on good acc that in the novel lwj is explicitly Repressed Gay Panicked Big Horny which is delightful and rly Adds to the performance
 baby lwj is really just conceal dont feel dont let them know u have EMOTIONS (derogatory)
jiang cheng rly went "why dont.u go play with HIM if u like him so much"
jc and wwx have big BIG annoying sibling energy dont think too hard abt it or youll cry
lotus pier is soo pretty :((((((((((((((((
up until episode 13 you could think this could be a magical ancient chinese gays pride n prejudice w swords and shenanigans ................youre just not prepared for the game of thrones of it all
seriously ha ha ha i cried so much w this show my eyes genuinely swelled up . like. physically. fun timez fun timez
that being said, its hilarious that wen xu goes to cloud recesses like 'come out or ill kill all these hostages' and then DOESNT WAIT FOR AN ASWER AND KILLS THEM ALL IMMEDIATELY. do u know how blackmail works sir
 would like to make it recorded that from day one i was like 'CALL A GODDAMN CULTIVATION G20 THIS ASSHOLE SECT IS LITERALLY MASSACRING YALL!!' and it took them like 3 or 4 massacres to do anything and they STILL sent their heirs into their territory  LIKE
when wwx cites the gusu lan rules to wen chao tho. that rebel/attention whore/cutie pie 'look lan zhan i DID memorize the rules after all' ‘also a big fuck you to the wen sect :D :D’ sweet spot that scene achieves . delicious
all the cultivator young masters being petty af even though they are practically prisoners at the cave is hilarious and i love them
hurt and comfort + gay mistunderstandings + watsonian gay declaration music + accidental evil acquisition! at the cave (2)
its like where do i start? the fact theyre both trapped and kind of heavily injured inside an isolated cave with a murder turtle? wwx gay panicking lwj into coughing up bad blood? lwj being jealous as wwx babbles abt mianmian? telling him he shouldnt play with people and wwx saying he never played him? wwx going Oh. I See what is happening. YOU like mianmian, and lwj absolute done face ??? (iconic) wwx touching the sacred married ribbon Again? the telepathic communication? the sword? WEI WUXIAN ASKING LAN WANGJI TO SING TO HIM AS HE IS PASSING OUT AND LWJ SINGING HIM. THE SONG. HE WROTE. FOR WWX. AND THAT HE CALLED. THEIR SHIP NAME????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
they are SO insufferable pleeeeease
in the words of my friend 1 : “CQL is so gay we were all amazed how it got past the censors Ofc unfortunately it can't be novel level gay But they did their best And we love them for it”
in the theme of songs THIS OST. WUJI HAS BEEN LIVING IN MY MIND RENT FREE SINCE I FIRST HEARD IT the whole ost is so so sO beautiful.
 the costuming in this is also soooo exquisite. the embroidery? the fabrics? the details? how every sect and clan has a distinct style and architecture? (also ik they based each off of dif periods in chinese history which is REALLY fucking cool) just chefs kiss
the direction too!. i enjoy the unusual camera movements and i think they give it that Vibe, also their composition is PARTICULARLY good when it comes to telling the subtext through position of camera/position of character (like nhs off to the side in scenes he at first glance doesnt need to be/ how lwj is often centered when hes Jealous Yearning at wwx being affectionate w other ppl, wwx return from burial mounds etc)
ik madam yu is like Badass Milf Check and shes not getting any mom of the year awards but im delighted at how messy she is. IMAGINE that woman on tiktok
you better have enjoyed gay cave (2) bc its Just Pain from here on out! 
jiang fengmian and madame yu win the Most Dramatic Way to show they do care about each other, actually ..... ever :)
i thought jiang yanli jiang cheng and wei wuxian forcing themselves to escape yunmeng barely holding on after their parents are killed was going to be the height of pain in this show. ha. 
the family dynamics in general on this showwwww, both blood/ adopted/ found families, brotherly bonds and lifelong friendships just. rly. truly. fucked me up. theyre all so important and complicated and well rounded and beautiful and tragic
and beyond being a Win For the Gays im so glad the relationships w wwx and jiang yanli/ wen qing were NOT changed from platonic bc they are so much better like that imo. like maybe if we didnt Live In A Society it wouldnt be so, but the fact wwx and others can love and value them so much and theres nothing romantic or sexual abt it is like. so refreshing. especially @ jyl, with the way he and jc are overprotective of her and shes such a nurturing/care taker figure for them, it would just not vibe as well if they made it romantic
i love that this is a story abt Wei Wuxian, the Yiling Patriarch aka Actual Satan/Boogey Man/Village With/Public Enemy Number One , my dude is literally a necromancer who only dresses in black and has evil smokey black tendrils wafting out of him, but the really edgy one is still jiang cheng, pastel purple fashion icon
and speaking of best/worst siblings wei wuxian and jiang cheng *immediately starts crying* 
The Golden Core Transfer i just. no thots only tears 
wen qing and wen ning putting themselves in so much danger just.... to help them. wn saving jc from wen chao. wq finding a way to get wwx to transfer his core. like thinking about the monumental work these two did to help wwx and jyl and jc... jyl trying so fucking hard to be strong and keep on moving and giver her little brothers comfort after losing everything... jiang cheng. losing his parents and his home and his ability to do anything abt it and his complete desperation and lack of self worth and turning on them with agression  when he didnt realize all that they did for him ... hhhhhhhhhhhhh
me, pointing at the whole cast “i just LOVE them mom!!!”
its sad tho, that BARELY ANY of the women have like.... actual important conversations let alone relationships with each other at all in the story. and like wq and jyl have stayed at the same place for extended periods of time, where wq actively took care of her TWICE,  and still! not one measly convo, nothing! ................ .𝓌ₕᵧ
everyone in this show need a good sip of Self Worth and Stop Sacrificing Yourself juice 
ngl the sword flying looks very dumb 
“a-cheng, please bring a-xian back.” “i will, i promise.” ;-;
the whole calling each other by the More Intimate Version of the name, first as teasing and later as true intimacy. mmmhmmm yes
untamed where everythings the same but wwx evil flute song is eoeo
related that scene when wwx comes back from the burial mounds for the first time w demonic cultivation and he acts all formal and calls lwj hanguang-jun and keeps being evasive and distant and mean and soooooo................. facetious 
and how hes kind of desperately trying to keep intense lwj at bay (A FIRST) and avoiding actually talking to either of them and its all tension ughhh and then he MOCKS his and lwjs relationship, he jokes w him in this like... mean echo of their usual ~banter~ oof 
 and like!!! uncertain but so relieved jc who just HUGS him w no reservations for once and its not like he isnt just as worried as lwj abt wwx and what hes doing, but he chooses in that moment to enjoy getting him back first and mmhmMMMmMm yes (maybe my favorite scene in the whole show? MAYBE SO. ) 
highkey hurt me but also. i might be into mean wwx. i will take no criticism.
lan zhans sad eyes tho :((((((((( 
on one hand i wish we could have seen what happened at the burial mounds but on the other the timeskip adds so much flair to his return so im hnnn
also i love that hes been missing for 3 months reappears kinda melancholic and bloodthirsty and knowing malign tricks and jc is like 'so. are u sad bc of lan wangji'
when ur bae survived the war but he thinks ur evil/ might be evil so you cant kiss :///
hmmm talking at the rooftop under the moonlight not mentioning everything that stands between usssss
they are the two jades of lan and we’ll be the two heroes of yunmeng is the type of line u dont even need to know whats gonna happen to know thats gonna be sad
when they fight wen ruoshan at the nightless city i thought that was the battle we see at the first ep and its not and its so easy and theyre all like ‘yayy we won go wwx!’ i was just. SCREAMS WHAT is gonna HAPPEN
so like. post burial mounds/sunshot campaign pre yiling patriarch wwx is like. ultra arrogant, ultra mocking, peak lil shit and it gave me e v e r y t h i n g i wanted
even tho having the wen prisoners at the targets at phoenix mountain and still having wwx and jzx shooting the arrows was???? so.... tone deaf 
wwx: fucking w demonic energy   jyl: he has never done anything wrong in his life, ever <3 <3 (mood)
the parallels between meng yao/wei wuxian (and even xue yang a bit?) are Seen and they are Valid
wwx post burial mounds: can yall SHUT UP abt the goddamn sword (suibian left the chat)
LIKE truly, we talk abt the angst and yearning with wangxian. but what abt wwx and suibian. xianbian / xianqing angst and comfort 100k
take a shot everytime someone coughs up blood
zidian is simply the coolest spiritual weapon rip to suibian and chenqing and bichen and sendou and baixa........ but tis the truth 
cons: everyones families died in a nightmare war! everyones homes burned to the ground! everyone is traumatized! pros: everyone gets cooler clothes and weapons!!
wen ning and a-yuan and yanli bestest babes squad dont touch me rn
everyone: brooding and fighting                                                                wq and jyl: why dont you try some acupunture/drinking some soup and calm down huh? how abt that bitch?? 
showing the battle/massacre at the nightless city first was genius actually bc then everytime we have a cute scene w yunmeng bros and theyre like 'we'll be together forever! uwu' youre like oh. oh no. oh no no no. 
justice vs lawfulness vs means and ends 👁
jc: stay in the right path and practice the art of the sword                        wx: yeah thats not gonna happen chief
my reaction to wwx renouncing to the sect politics to help the wens was just that elmo burning gif in succession
the dramatic rain. wen qing desperately calling out to wen ning. the ghosts/puppets killing the guards. how terrifying wn actually was while wwx was controlling him :( lwj goeing after him to try and stop him and then he just; he Sees him and understands him even if he cant actually do anything about it other than let them go. 
“there must be somewhere in this earth we can go to :(((((((((”
"IF I HAVE TO FIGHT THEM, I'D RATHER IT BE YOU. DYING BY YOUR HANDS WOULD AT LEAST BE WORTH IT." oh my god oh my god oh my goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooddddddd
also lwjs umbrella is white w black smoke.. .  . nice
yiling patriarch / demonic farming burial mounds settlement is like one of my favorite concepts. they an "EVIL" FARMING COMMUNITY LED BY THE VILLAGE WITCH COME ON
they planted TURNIPS and LOTUS FLOWERS and ONE (1) baby and made lanterns and a common hall :(((((((
wen qing and wei wuxian, baddest bitches and genius science best friends i absolutely LOVED to see it. they rly went ‘is anyone gonna sibling/project partner that’ and didnt wait for an answer
both wwx and jyl getting lotus ponds at the burial mounds and in lanling bc they miss lotus pier ;;;;;;;w
;;;;; wish jyl had actually gone into the burial mounds. we were robbed of jyl and wq meeting again and jyl meeting a-yuan and seeing the settlement and the homes and all ;w; at least jc did go, stab wounds and broken arms and all
wwx like... having thrown his whole life away to help the wens (yeah the sect leaders and jin guangshan in particular wanting his stygian tiger amulet was an Element but still) and not.... necessarily regretting it, but grappling with all of the consequences of it... becoming moody and drepressed at times, missing his family and lotus pier and his friends and probably simply missing being around people and causing trouble, extrovert that he is, lashing out at the wens and at a-yuan, just in general the whole messiness of that experience
the way the resentful energy does affect his temperament is rly nice bc its not too in your face,(i mean outside of the Shaky Hands of Rage) but like he clearly has a much lesser control on his anger and impulsivity (tall order) than both before bm and after hes ressurected
on that note A-YUAN BABIEST BABY BOY BEST BOY
lan zhan being like oh hey there wei ying fancy meeting u and our son here. just passing by u know how it is hmmmmMm and then PLOT TWIST having defied orders to go see him and being punished for it. oof;;
 they habent seen each other in like? a year? and now theyre tgt 10 seconds and are already parenting a child together
also lwj rly kneels down in the snow way too much to be healthy
wwx: calm down guyssss i wont lose control of demonic cultivation omgggg  .   spoiler alert: he loses control of demonic cultivation
did u enjoy cute children? good bc now the Real Pain Begins
jiang yanli and jin zixuan rly out there APROPRIATING both disaster gays AND bury ur gays huh ;w;
i KNEW jin lings birthday was gonna fuck something up but the GASP that left my body when wwx lost control of wn and killed jin zixuan .. . . 
im sorry and thank you aaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAaAAAAA 
when wen ning and wen qing were telling wwx their plan i was saying NO NO NO NO NO NO out loud in despair 
also can we talk abt how wq is definetely talking about only the both of them surrending themselves but then? everyone else just surrenders w them? IT MAKES NO SENSE LIKE WHY WOULD THEY what would be the Point
 sometimes there are some pretty gaping jumps in logic and continuity that are just like                     ?          ?
wwx: oh so when you try to murder me its justified but when i survive through dark magic and murder all of you its a "war crime"
unsurprisingly, his most feral, most spiraling moment talking to the sect leaders on the roof and attacking them and even fighting lan zhan is among my favorite scenes... its like, so painful to watch but also   so       thrilling   (and maybe my wen bbs dying arose some resentful energy in me what can i say) 
and its JUST, all they ever wanted was to do good but then... war. and trauma. and hubris. 
jiang cheng on the ground clearly thorn between what to do and feel is a Mood, lets just say
i was already crying when jyl showed up, but if i wasnt-
 i suffered SO MUCH through this series trying to figure out WHY jc would kill wwx. and when i understood. its somehow not as bad as i thought and also MUCH MUCH WORSE
a look into my group chat during the last flashback episodes:
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SO ANYWAY. after the BLOOD BATH and RIPPING YOUR HEART OUT and FEEDING IT TO YOU  the untamed goes ‘ayy back to the present!! tu du dud ud du’ 
literally it ends a quarter into an episode and then KEEPS GOING i had to pause and stare blankly at the ceiling for an hour
babie cultivators and detective soulmates . i do need some cute after All of That 
(not that the pain is over LOL)
lwj is significantly less emotionally repressed in the present and its delightful. hes just ALL IN with wwx. and not just in the ‘i would and have killed various men and risked my reputation for you’ but also ‘ur tired here have a drink i brought it up cause i know u like it and it want you to be happy, always’
“when everyone praised me and wanted my power, you were the only one that challenged me. now that everyone hates me and wants me dead, youre the only one that stands by my side.” hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnn 
and just filling in the blanks how lan zhan searched for him. for all of those 16 years he searched for him and was punished for it and raised a-yuan, the only survivor of the burial mounds settlement, as his own in gusu......
and jiang cheng.  being the tough love uncle . having raised the yunmeng jiang clan from the rubble all alone, his whole family dead, some of it on the blame of his own brother, his siblings, his closest friends gone.......and only jin ling there needing his guidance. 
THE PARALLEL BETWEEN JIN LING BEING A LIFELINE FOR JIANG CHENG AND A-YUAN FOR LAN WANGJI AFTER THE BATTLE AT THE NIGHTLESS CITY  
great now i made myself sad
and like . the fact! that lwj and jc dislike each other!!. jc projects blame onto him for wwx both “leaving” him and indirectly causing their families deaths and when hes so consumed by it he makes wwx an enemy, lwj is there now? trying to protect him?? and lwj, who can never understand the pain that wwx , indirectly or not put jc through, but who was right there when jc tried to kill him and will never allow him to hurt wwx again. and how they like. in a way project blame of their tragedies onto each other while dealing with some type of survivor guilt and in their own way still loving wwx through it all???  amd in way its kind of fundamentally selfish but also tragically understandable? and like when u put it against the fact that after he disappears during the sunshot campaign they were looking for him together and fought together??
JUST. THE CHARACTERS. AND THE RELATIONSHIPS IN THIS. MAN. UGH. GOD. 
and like i think thats what makes it so good? its such a sad and painful and violent story, edgy even, but its compelling bc at the center of it there are all of these relationships and different types of love and hope and. :( i love it
enough crying lets talk abt wwx sleeping at the jingshi with lwj and wearing his under garment for a minute 🙏
 jin ling just has that Was Raised by JC energy tho lmao i love him
babie cultivator squad is the perfect ammount of cute and comedic relief while still bearing the weight? of the narrative in a way, both from sizhui and jin lings existences, and also. like. how do i put this. they feel hopeful? they were born after a war, they came of age at a time of relative peace, they dont hold on so closely to the resentments of their parents/father figures, they are specifically shown as more accepting and open minded. and its like.... Hope for the future  
one of the ?? things  i love the most is the fact that the main cast are often in situations where theyre hunted/running but they like. never wear disguises... just going around in their gorgeous expensive clan clothes and hair ornaments and distinctive spiritual weapons.... maybe w a straw hat on, just for kicks
wwx teacher 🥺🥺🥺
so this is why its called Yi City Misery huh
a-qing is such. an icon. im so sad. my girl even knew to leave xys dumb self rotting by the road but no one listens to her thats why theyre all dead or sad 
her and xue yang measuring each other up was so entertaining lmao
 its the funniest thing when hes like. HERES MY SAD STORY. FOR WHY IM A SADISTIC MURDERER. I BROKE MY HAND ONCE. 
like ok someone broke his hand in a horrible way, and like Poverty, i get it but also like.......... that lost the brunt of a proper sob story like, 50 sadistic murders ago bby
and i love that xingchen does not entertain that for a second hes like ‘not ?????? good enough???’ and the best thing is he wasnt even like 'u hadto be the bigger person' or sth but ' well then break that dudes hand back, rip his arm off for i care, what do the rest of us have to do w anything???” 
anjo sensato :(
xue yang is like..... the sexy sadistic evil version of a himbo..... a meanbo...
the fucked upness of xy’s feelings for xxc/ xxc and sl feelings for each other... like my dude literally gave his bf HIS EYES. and xy getting so attached to xxc .... the fucked up fake domesticity.... having him hurt sl..... then desperately trying to bring him back ...................... oof
song lan........... literally had his eyes AND tongue removed, his bfs eyes put in place, was almost killed, turned into a puppet by his bf unknowingly, manipulated by xy, sees his bf killing himself in despair.... and STILL finds the strenght to get up from there, and keep on traveling and helping people and attempting to fix xxcs soul.......... like, my man. damn. 
wangxian looking at songxiao and seeing an Actually more painful parallel for themselves. ft. that Color Coding. 
THE A-YUAN/SIZHUI REVEAL PUNCHED ME IN THE HEART but in a good way for a change
should have know that he would be the Best Boy the cute one w all the braincells
the butterfly AND the bunny lantern. i see how it is
u know is very convenient that no one can see the stark black veins on wen nings neck, ever 
BAT WEN NING 
wns face when lwj comes into wwx room like ‘:0 omg did u two finally get your shit together? good for you master wei good for u’ 
(they didnt) (yet)
DISASTER DRUNK LWJ. JUST. THRUST SOME CHICKENS TO SHOW UR RESSURECTED BAE THAT U LOVE THEM.
i have absolutely no idea WHY they gave lwj the same punishment for fighting his own sect/allies to protect the burial mounds as when they got drunk on cloud recess class days.... like? its such a ... emotional continuity error again
also is lwj gonna get an actual friend besides wwx , ever
mianmian marrying and having a family and a cute life after saying FUCK U AND UR SYSTEM TOO in a much less unhinged and dramatic way than wwx......... fills me w joy
also lol the idea that like. her husband not knowing that shes friends w satan/the boogey man/the village witch is hilarious
i love nie mingjue bc hes the resident Though Guy but also the most dramatic bitch in this show and thats Saying Something
jin ling cant have one uneventful relative can he
the fact that everyone present already knew “mo xuanyu” was wwx at the stairs is so funny, their faces are like ‘oh............ wow. that. sure is a development. shock” 
in the tradition of extremely loud whispers wwx tells lwj with twelve guards standing like one meter away from them: HEY PSH LAN ZHAN PRETEND IM FORCING YOU TO STAY W ME DO IT
oh my god oh my god
the absolute Yearning on his face when he leaves wwx and a-yuan at the burial mounds and refuses to stay for dinner was already Enough but the fact?? they brought it back?? to this declaration of love?? their expressions??????? strike me dead right now just go ahead
lFor Legal Reasons We Cant Kiss but we will have a very sappy declaration of love and trust and look at each other in way that is the actualization of 💞💘💗💖💓💘💞💗💖💘💗💖💕💞
also icb all the sect leaders and guards are standing there watching them say they like like each other with a dozen swords pointing at their neck
i enjoyed the depiction of the fickle public perception and how easily it can be used to scapegoat people. when the sect leaders turn on jgy and wwx knows thats its more for convenience than anything else...
poor lxc is literally like 'oh so when YOUR problematic boyfriend gets called evil its a misunderstanding but when its MY problematic bf-'
ok like i cant get over nmj let jgy play a song that messed with his temperament at all, like maN u KNEW he might be shady wth
wwx: “hey dont say anything bad abt lan zhan hes not an arrogant dick, thats just his face. 
ME ON THE OTHER HAND"
the cultivators as wwx is poking holes in their narrative is literally *nazaré meme*
"wei wuxian-!" "what did i break your leg, too?" not to be problematic but i laughed so hard
not as hard as "you dont have the rank to talk to me " tho
i Enjoy that, over the course of story, wwx sees that... theres nothing truly to Do, but move on. he saw how his arrogance and his mistakes hurt others, and hes trying to fix what he can, but he already did die for his mistakes and there are things he cant fix and that's. just how it is. even towards jgy, the narrative doesn't go gleefully and completely with "lets make THEM pay bc theyre the big bad" bc its not that simple, and it wouldn't lead anywhere but more pain...
re him and jiang cheng and the wens and kinda. isnt that what nhs did? scheming to displace jgy out of revenge more than any justice and doing so in the most painful way?
idk if that actually makes sense im truly just babbling
i thought the scene at the lotus pond would be CUTE but the context was PAIN again
jiang cheng finding out about his golden core and his conflict with wwx at the guanyin temple .... destroyed me but in a nice way kinda.... same way it destroys him look at his face oh god
and. the fact??? he sacrificed himself for wwx?? first?? and he'll probably never tell anyone much less wwx???? keeps me up at night
i havent decided if the neckbreak transition between jgy does sth super Evil or does he he does OR Does He yes he does O R does heeeee is sth i dislike or not
jin guangyao and wei wuxians most interesting parallel is that... theyve both seen 'hmm hey this system is fucked up' and wwx went 'so fuck it all i will renounce it and challenge it' and jgy went 'so fuck it i will use all of it to my advantage and manipulate it to my goals and whims'
the fact jgys mom was actually great and he loved her and his whole issue w it was more than simply being ashamed of being a bastard kinda got me ngl
never trust a dude with a fan.
nhs and jgy: the first rule to a convoluted and decades spanning violent revenge plot is to have fun and be yourself! 
when a-yuan finally FINALLY remembers ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; wen ning has someone in his family back and a-yuan has someone to talk abt his wen family and wwx has him back bc he survived and lwj raised him anD HES THEIR SON. THEYRE MARRIED AND HAVE A SON. UGH.
and theyre allowed to heal. everyone is allowed to try and recover and be happy
netflix put all of the 3 endings on top of each other and it looks kinda weird actually BUT I DONT EVEN MIND :’’’’’’’’’)
the gasp that left me when lwj says ‘wei ying’ and wwx turns.........
there was also a screen with ‘thank you mxtx for creating these characters, we hope their wishes come true’ and i might. have cried then too. maybe. 
that was . a ride. as is proven by this behemot of a ramble clearly i just really needed and Outlet. i am currently trying to convince dumb monkey brain to not consume the other medias of mdzs immediately bc i REALLY need to like. live. a life. and take care of real responsibilities.  *longest oh boi ever*
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If you're still taking requests, how about some fluff with Aaravos reuniting with mc after escaping from the mirror
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Aaravos x Reader - Everyone Needs a Friend
A/N: thank you so much for your patience, Nonny! I've had a hard time with school during the pandemic, and my health has been pretty shitty, but I was so excited to do this request and I'm so happy I was able to get to it! In this, the reader is some sort of cleaner in the castle that came across Aaravos many months ago. it picks up sometime after season 3 after Aaravos has theoretically emerged from the cocoon. Not explicitly romantic, but I there's definitely some subtext (who can tell with this elf though, he comes across as such a flirt). Someone give this touch starved star touch baby some hugs!
It has been months now, and I am still heartbroken. I do not know where Lord – King? The politics are confusing – Viren took the magic mirror after King Harrow’s death, but he took it somewhere I could not find nor reach. Perhaps I allowed myself to get too attached. After all, I have never even heard his voice.
Aaravos… he was the one bright spot in my life. I am not sure he meant to reveal himself to me that day I was cleaning the study, but ever since then, he became one of my dearest friends. He offered me a way to hear him, and in hindsight, I wonder if I should have taken the chance, but I cannot do magic. We settled for written notes to each other. His: a glowing elegant script that floated in the air, and mine: messy scrawls on whatever ink and spare paper I could find.
He particularly seemed to enjoy hearing about humanity, about the five kingdoms and our advancements. It seems he has been in that mirror an exceptionally long time. It is heartbreaking to think how lonely he must have been, and I so desperately wished to help him, but I have no power to do so. All I could do is provide a little company.
I hope he is not lonely wherever Viren took him. Now that the temporary king is dead… does anyone else know where the mirror could be? Or will he be alone again? What if he is lost forever? Perhaps I should go looking for him? But wherever Viren hid himself for whatever dark magic he practiced, it was somewhere none of the castle guards could find him. What hope do I have?
Today is the first day going back into Viren’s old study. Once the armies marched on Xadia, it did not need as regular a cleaning. I wonder what the room will become now that he is dead. First things first, it needs a decent dusting.
Being here makes me think of the elf, of his sparkling cheeks that glowed when he smiled, of his golden eyes that so often twinkled with mischief, and my heart aches all over again.
A couple spiders have made their home in one of the high corners of the room. I climb a ladder and begin my work at clearing out the cobwebs. The door to the study remains closed, but a moment later I hear someone clear their throat in introduction. I whirl around in surprise a little too fast, my precarious position on the ladder causing me to fall.
I land in a warm embrace, and for a moment all I can see is a deep purple fabric covering the chest of my rescuer. “I apologize, I did not mean to startle you,” he says. His voice is deep and smooth, and he speaks softly in my ear. I lift my eyes to the speaker and find a face I thought I would never see again.
How is he here?
I feel my mouth curve into a smile mirroring his as Aaravos looks at me with a certain fondness in his eyes. I brush my knuckles along his sparkling cheek, barely believing my eyes. When he speaks again, I realize I could listen to that sound for the rest of my life. I had not imagined his voice to rumble with such a melodious baritone, but it suits him. “You did not think I was gone forever, did you?”
I have half a mind to slap that pretty face for how cavalier he is about this. I settle for a gentle smack to his arm. “I was worried about you, you jerk!”
Aaravos laughs, pulling me closer in his embrace. “Finally, I hear your voice. It is as lovely as you are.” He pulls back to look in my eyes again, cupping my cheek in his hands.
Now that I have found my voice after my initial shock, every question I have comes spilling from my lips. “What happened? Where did you go? How did you escape the mirror? How did you get here?”
Aaravos only seems to half-listen to my questions, his hands gliding along my shoulders to stroke down my arms as if I am some miracle to examine. He takes my hands in his. I feel so ordinary next to him, my simple flesh contrasted by his sparkling lilac fingers. But maybe I am something interesting in his eyes. Those that live in the plains are fascinated by the mountains. Those that spend their whole lives inland are amazed by the sea. I can only hope that I am interesting by being so different from him, I suppose.
The elf brings my hands to his lips with a ghost of a kiss to my knuckles. He glances at me, then moves his eyes away as if shy. “It is a long story. Perhaps I could tell you on our journey?”
I tilt my head. “Journey?”
He murmurs my name then clears his throat. “When I escaped my prison, I emerged in Xadia, and I will have to return soon. I do not… that is… I have not had the luxury of friendship in a few hundred years, if ever. You have been a friend to me, and I thought I would return the favor... and take you with me.”
I let out a slight laugh at the thought. “So… you came all this way and found me because you want to be my friend?”
Aaravos’s cheeks turn a deep violet and he frowns. “You make it sound frivolous.”
I laugh out of sheer joy and throw my arms over his shoulders and hug him. “I missed you,” I mumble into his chest.
Aaravos chuckles. “You told me you have never been outside your hometown, and I am curious how the world has changed in the last few centuries. What do you say we see it together?”
“I’m insulted you think you even have to ask,” I respond.
Aaravos grins and takes my hand, leading me out the secret passageway he took to find me. We exit the castle hand in hand, and I feel Aaravos leaning into my shoulder as we walk, as if he has never had a hand to hold.
I lean back into him, resting my head on his shoulder for a moment. I am happy to be that person for him, happy to be needed for nothing more than my company, happy to be a friend to a lonely elf.
And I do not tell him how much I needed a friend, too. I just enjoy the tale he spins of his adventures since he saw me last.
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smugraccoon137 · 3 years
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Supergirl Season 2 episode 8 Medusa review part 2
If your curious part 1 was just my breakdown of Kara and Mon-els relationship that got way too long. But as always SPOILERS AND GAY THOUGHTS AHEAD
Me and kel get so excited when Lenas in an episode. Like practically giddy. I can’t help smiling when shes on screen honestly. And yes Katie McGrath is beautiful, but beyond that such a pretty smile and lovely voice. I’m sure ratings started to spike when she joined the cast. Okay enough about pretty girls on to the review 
Tipsy fucking Alex though guys I can’t get over this mess of a person. 
Alex: if I have to come out to my mom then I choose to do it drunk
Kara: no your not *yoinks beer*
Alex: wait no my coming out juice
Kara Danvers sneaky sneaker extraordinaire can totally interview Lena and find out Cadmus things without anyone knowing. The confidence this goofball has is top tier
Underrated relationship: Alex and Winn though. I really really love Winn and honestly Alex is such big sister energy to both him and Kara. 
wow Lenas pretty in the interview scene. A touch of auburn hair from the sunlight really makes this shot and we never get to see her with her hair down. Fan service honestly, or maybe she heard a certain beef cake reporter was gonna come by and wanted to dazzel her.
Lena: hair up is for business. Hair down is for flirting friendship time with Kara
Poor baby thinks she falls short nooooo. Your doing your best godamn your only like 25 jesus. Kara give her a hug she needs love and affection
Kara thinks shes being so sneaky in this interview. Such a golden retriever, bad at sneakin. As soon as she toes the line Lena catches on and kicks her out. Really good acting in the scene, the subtle change in expression to show Lenas guard raising. Good job Katie.
Real quick Lena why is your office so ugly? How do you keep it clean? You spend 99% of your days in this place and its whiter than a hospital room. I hate it. Why is your desk an oval? and why does it have a hole in it? Kara cant eat you out in secret anymore damn. 
OOHHHhhhh noooo the fucking gas bomb in the bar what the fuck. EVERYBODIES DEAD JESUS WHAT WAS THAT
Poor Mon-el. What happened at the bar was fucked up, and he feels like its fault when its obviously not.
Love that he and Kara are having bro time playing some Monopoly. Oh no not Kara asking if he likes her. Honestly thought these two had good chemistry in this scene. Im a sucker for dumbass not understanding certain words and phrases. So Kara having to reiterate her questions and finally being like “You don’t want to mate with me do you?” was super fun. Omegaverse vibes mfs. Although I am confused by mon-els reaction “I mean have you seen the kind of women I’ve been attracting?” I honestly don’t know what this means.
Kara internal reaction though: Oh thank god
Wow Kara really just has no regard for her own life, huh? she just opens the door and possibly contaminates herself. It’s good to want to help people, but love you gotta care about yourself too
Good reveal with the fortress of solitude. Oof Kara gonna feel like its her fault all those aliens died and mon-els sick. They do a really good job of showing Karas relationship with her parents through their holograms. She wants so badly to see them again, to talk to them. And she can, but not really. They just aren’t real.
Lena cattily to her mother: im used to celebrating holiday weekends alone at my desk
me to Kara: please invite her to thanksgiving
Okay so Lena being adopted is another interesting parallel to Kara. Also the fact that both Kara and Lena fall into there families shadows, and are left behhind or forgotten. Really interesting how Lena and Karas relationship is so similar to Clark and Lex’s for obvious purposes. Though the CW queer coding the fuck out of their relationship in Smallville really only adds to Supercorp fever. Its always been Homoerotic subtext Harold!
Me watching Lena and Lillian trade verbal blows: Wow ya’lls relationship is fucked up. Lex and Lionelle would spar and fence but you two are on another level jesus
oooooof that last line. 
Lena: I know your lying
Lillian: and how could you possibly know that?
Lena: because you told me you loved me. And we both know thats not true
Who wrote this jesus fuck my heart. The PAIN.
Bonus thought Lena thinks Karas smart. Goofball beefcake sneaky sneakster who doesnt know the difference between flirting and friendship is smart she thinks. I love these idiots
Wow Kara just doesn’t wait huh? Oh cadmus is going to be at LCorp? Not on my watch. Lena’s there. I know this because I tune into her heart beat just to check on her cus she likes to work late. Don’t worry Alex it’s for friendship reasons.
That LCorp security guard got princess carried for .2 seconds. Best moment of his life.
God its like dark out. Lenas working on a holiday weekend into the night. I hate this, give her friends.
Lena looks so scared when Kara gets thrown into the giant LCorp sign
And then hurt Kara looking up at her with dread.
Kara internal: fuck don’t come out now. I came here to save you
God I love the protectiveness. Its *chefs kiss*. Hank throwing the beam at Lena and Kara even in her hurt state throwing herself in front of it. Sometimes self sacrifice is gay. But how Lena looks at her after wards like “I can’t believe I’m alive. I can’t believe she chose to save me”. Met with a gruff “Get out of here!”. mm yes this is my kind of content. Fight for me.
I was robbed an aftercare scene but I doubt it will be the last time. (*COUGHS* the “im leaving” phone call *COUGHS*)
Talking about the virus Eliza: what about Lena Luthor?
Kara: What about her?! (super defensive is also a super power maam)
Winn: Luthors can be pretty good actors
Kara: No, I looked into LENAS EYES. She doesn’t know anything about cadmus or her mother
J’onzz: Would you stake Mon-els life on that?
well I guess that really puts Lena and Mon-el right next to each other in priorities huh? Which one is more important? 
Wow Lena totally has a crush on Supergirl after that. Flustered dork. 
Lena: *laughs nervously* you know that doors not really an entrance
Kara: *upsettit stone face pupper*
Lena: :,) 
Okay but the way Lena just says “Anything” all breathless and helpful when Kara says she needs her help. Shes crushin hard
Kara tells Lena her mother is in charge of Cadmus. 
Lena: >:(
Annnd the crush is dead. That did not last long. Really love that Lena has such a different relationship with Kara vs Supergirl though, good dynamic having her reactions so different. Which I believe actually relates as a Clark and Lois parallel? Seeing as how Lois has two separate relationships with Clark and Superman. 
OOf the way Lenas throat bobs with genuine sadness because who she thought Supergirl was is wrong. Shes just like the rest of them. Thinks Lena is just another crazy Luthor. It hurts
Kara: I know what its like to be disillusioned by our parents, but Im a pretty good judge of character, and you are not like your mother. She is cold and dangerous. And you are too good and too smart to follow in her path. Be your own Hero.
Wow just what a good line. They are capable of some things here and there arent they? Melissa's delivery on this is excellent. And the way Katie McGrath is able to show such depth of sadness and bitterness even from a shot of her BACK is really cool. Great acting in this scene in particular. And I can see why the “desperation to be good” is such a highlighted part of these two relationship. Its the one thing in common between Lena and Supergirl, the place where they can meet in the middle. And the way Lena looks after her as she leaves! AHHH thats the good shit, the pining
Okay big Mon-el scene in coming so if you dont want to hear my ranting skip over this part. 
Funny how as soon as Kara has this big impactful scene with Lena full of tension and emotion the writers were like: shit we almost forgot Mon-els dying. 
Kara: *staring sadly back into Lenas office kind of wanting to go back in*
Writers: *cough cough* KARA He’s DYINGGGG
Kara: Oh shit right. Mon-el Oh no. My *looks at poorly written handwriting on her palm* romantic interest?
Wow Mon-el looks like shit, poor guy. Someone swaddle this pillow princess and get him some soup.
Heres a question. Kara is visibly upset that Mon-el is dying. Is it because she’s sad that the guy shes likes is dying. Because her friend is dying? Because her father created the virus thats killing him (what the writers want us to think)? Or because no matter what Kara does the people she loves keep falling through the cracks and shes helpless to stop it?
Her parents. Clark. Her adoptive father. Now Lena. Now Mon-el. Why can’t she ever do anything? Why is it always her fault? This poor kid has some deep seeded abandonment issues
Mon-el: you know you look beautiful with the weight of all these worlds on your shoulders.
I do remember my reaction here, cus I thought this was a weird line. A line that was obviously meant to be romantic and complimentary, but it felt unsettled in my stomach. Coming back and watching the scene it sits even more uncomfortably there. He obviously means well, but this line is kind of just shitty. Its a very selfish and unthoughtful thing to say to someone. 
Kara’s entire fucking life has revolved around other people and making sure they are happy and taken care of. But having “failed” at such a young age to do the impossible things asked of her (carrying on Kryptons legacy, raising Clark) she overcompensates. Any normal person would just make their life revolve around their family and friends, not healthy but it works. But Kara feels responsibility over an entire world of lost people and lives. So the amount she overcompensates is ungodly. She does have the weight of worlds on her shoulders. This is not a joke or hyperbole. Its just her life. And thats so fucking shitty. And to have someone actually see that and acknowledge it. To make it a reality so to speak. Then to have them say “yeah you look good like this” while you’re a shaking Atlas being crushed. It is just a little too much isn’t it? That pain to have someone see you finally, and then completely miss the point. For them to go “oh wow your so strong. your so brave” instead of “let me help you. you shouldn’t have to do this at all, forget by yourself. But now I am here”. 
I imagine this was the scene that crowned my darling himbo boy Mon-Hell? Which is so unfortunate. I hope Im wrong, but I feel that his character might just end up a big missed opportunity
I want everyone to know that me and Kel screamed through the entire enxt few seconds of the scene. We knew the kiss was coming from how they were building it up. But god was it painful, especially for it to be delivered after a line like THAT. But yeah very loud angry screaming
Also not to be that bitch but Kara and Mon-els scene was a total of 1:53 RT, and Kara and Lenas ran at a 1:57 RT. Just sayin...
No Lena don’t be evil thats too sexy...
Okay but the way that Lena just tricks Lillian is so good. Shes so clever. And added bonus she makes her ask for her help, which is nice actually. Lillian's obvious vice is weakness and that is often shown in embarrassment. A woman like this asking for help borders that line of weakness and its nice to see on such a dislikable character. Lena didn’t just get what she wanted she got a point over her mother.
Lena looks good in the purple coat. Repeat she is pretty
Love the mental chess game between Lena and Lillian. Lena offering help right off the bat and giving her the isotope free of charge. And then Lillian making Lena launch the virus to prove herself. Good stuff.
Kara appears: don’t do it Lena!
Lena: why not? im a luthor
Okay so obviously Lena switched the Isotope and the Virus won’t work. But thats what makes this line so perfect. Throwing it back in Supergirls face. Like “Yeah, Im a luthor. And Ill show you what im capable of.” But instead of mass death and destruction Lena saves the day. She saved thousands of lives, and its because shes a Luthor that she was able to do that. Really nice way to full circle that 
Wow Lillian really just starts booking it without Lena, huh? bitch
I really love the scene of the virus falling all around National City. The choice of an orangish snow falling was a really really good one. Paired with some excellent music for the mid season finale.
Its sad but I do love Hank just being ready and at peace with death. Im sure he misses his wife and daughters. 
Okay but Lena calling the cops is tea. Send your mom to jail honey. 
So we’re really not gonna talk about how Lena saved everyones asses? Like don’t you think Supergirl would want to talk to the woman that A) kind of tricked her, and B) saved National City. Thats just what makes sense??? But no we’re going to ignore that the DEO is a kind of shit at their job sometimes. And that the woman that they were accusing of having a part to play in all the xenophobic shit is the one who did their job. BY HER SELF. 
Okay rant over. This was a long one review dear god. Really really good episode though. I enjoyed rewatching all the scenes even if it was a mixed bag of feelings. Thanks for reading hope you enjoyed all the screaming!
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AWAE 3x1 rewatch: thoughts and reactions
So we’re finally here, up to the (unfortunately) final season of AWAE. I will be rewatching and reacting to the first half of the season only, since I’ve already posted my reactions to episodes 5-10 when they were coming out. Just thought I’d say that here. 
For this rewatch, I will be adding onto the notes to myself I made when first watching the episode. Also, this is dedicated to Amybeth McNulty for her birthday today.
So, without further ado, I suggest we dive right in.
Can we talk about how Anne’s beautiful green ribbon gets untied and flies into the air while she is riding through the snow and she doesn’t even seem to care? I mean, she looks back and smiles at it, but doesn’t even think of trying to retrieve it… If I were her, I would have turned the horse around. Although it did seem like the ribbon was too high up in the air for her to reach. Also, her hair is beautiful flying loose in the wind… like we’ve never seen it before. [Present-day note: of course we’ll see it like that again, and from Gilbert’s point of view. That scene was magical. Truly magical]
So… Ruby still has it for Gilbert… and she has it going on strong… she’s supposed to be covering the hockey game for the school newspaper, but she’s dropped her notebook in the snow [Present-day note: again, my dislike of ruining material objects speaks here, but - I felt really bad for that notebook. It’s done nothing to deserve being ruined by the snow] because she only has eyes for one of the players… and so does Anne. I really hope the budding love between her and Gil doesn’t shatter poor little peach Ruby’s heart. [Present-day note: I’m so beyond happy she got over him before Anne realised that she was, as they would say on Friends, ‘under’ him.] She’s a dearie and deserves the best.
The hockey field (probably nothing more than a frozen lake, but this is the 19th century, so, you know) has apparently turned into a place of courtship, as Billy is giving his attentions to Josie and Moody to Diana… but her parents won’t allow it. “Too rich to be a minister’s wife?”, Josie teases. But then the attention shifts to Gilbert who stares at something undefined between Anne and Ruby, leaving it ambiguous which girl his affections are directed to. The whole thing is very awkward to watch, and with no Cole around to reassure Anne that Gilbert has a crush on her, and her only, she may as well think he’s finally returning Ruby’s sympathies. That scene is intense.
The natives appear – a man and a little girl, presumably his daughter, the girl that was mentioned in the articles promoting this season. It turns out the man is the one who makes the hockey sticks for the boys, and the difference in nature between Gilbert and Billy is once again emphasised by how they each treat him. Billy is superficially polite, saying “Thank you” when receiving his new stick, but he says it in a sort of patronising way, like the subtext here is “We whites are better than you”. Gilbert, on the other hand, is just as polite and respectful as he would be to any white man – or woman, for that matter. I mean, he lives with a black couple, so he can’t be racist at all. I mean, he’s an absolute cinnamon roll.
Anne is even better with the natives, as in, she doesn’t even notice anything about them that would make them superficially different than her and her peers. She asks if she could write an article about the man, but not about his lifestyle or different standards, but about the sticks he makes. She sees the quality work, not that the man doing it is non-white. And I bet she’ll be learning a lot about their life and culture later on, in a perfectly respectful and inclusive way. This is beautiful.
Billy comes back and is all kinds of disrespectful, so the girl, Ka’kwet, shows her dislike of him very clearly, and her father warns her against “stir[ring] trouble with the white man”… the tension can’t be ignored anymore. It can practically  be cut with a knife.
The man offers a great judgement of Billy – “The little man with the big ego” – in his own native language, so only Ka’kwet understands. But he couldn’t be more right.
Billy walks away, muttering “Savages” under his breath. Anne, however, isn’t shaken for a millisecond in her wish to visit and interview them later.
So, Billy won’t even be coming back to school, as he’s stepping into the family business. I’m hoping we won’t see much of him anymore. [Present-day note: Unfortunately, we will. And when I say unfortunately, I mean devastatingly. Before this season, I didn’t think this excuse of a guy could get any worse, but in the latter half he’s proven to be an absolute entitled monster. I loathe him, and I’m not even sorry for allowing myself to feel such negative emotions.]
Jane is “chaperoning” Josie and Billy as they walk back from the game? I mean, yes, she is his sister, but she’s younger than him, I think. But well, I’m not sure how chaperoning works in such a situation.
Anne arrives at the natives’… village? What is it, exactly? Anyway, her new budding friendship with Ka’kwet (which, the poor thing says, just means “starfish”; now she and Anne can bond over wishing they had a different name – although Anne isn’t as resentful of hers anymore, now that she’s signed the family bible as “Anne Cordelia Shirley- Cuthbert) is just so beautiful… this show is pure aesthetic. [Both visually and in terms of content.]
Marilla disapproves of Anne’s having fraternised with the natives… the tension builds up. I guess Anne won’t be stopped from seeing her new friends so easily, though.
At the Pye household, Josie’s mother is pressuring her to “get a hold” of Billy before someone else does. I mean, she’s a Pye – an unpleasant person as per the book, so she deserves him. Let her have him, as long as Gilbert is reserved for Anne and Anne alone. [Yeah, in retrospect, not even Josie deserves this imbecile. But I didn’t know back then just how bad he could be.]
So Anne’s words “seems to me I was destined to be the bride of adventure” from the teaser are part of her evening prayer – a change from the (apparently) usual plea to make her good-looking, which she now, on the brink of age 16, sees as a childish wish and not a real prayer. Anne has grown!
“Many suitors or even just one…” Come on, Anne, are you blind? You have one – The One at that. Take Notice of him… I mean, the Take Notice board will be returning as per a gif set I saw here on Tumblr, so I really hope Shirbert moves on a bit quicker than it has so far.
Bash and Mary have a baby! Since when? I don’t know, but I love it. Is Gilbert the godfather? Seeing as he is Bash’s best friend and honorary brother, he must be… oh dreams…. [Either way, he’s her Uncle Gilby]
Her name is Delphine? That’s beautiful. Also, Gilbert just kissed her forehead before going out to school… the dream has come true.
The unlikely duo of Rachel Lynde and Miss Stacy takes centre stage in the next scene where Miss Stacy says she doesn’t need a man as she has discovered self-sufficiency after her husband’s death. Mrs. Lynde, of course, wants to play matchmaker for her. As I said, this is an unlikely duo and I would very much like to know how this relationship turns out further.
Anne and Diana are dreading the nearing day of their separation as Di goes to finishing school in Paris and Anne goes to college in Queens. I really want to know how this separation will turn out. [Fortunately, I won’t have to find out, and neither will they.]
 Another line of tension builds up with the resurrection of the Take Notice board, as the girls discuss the pressure to get married soon and Josie teases Anne about becoming an old maid, as seen in the trailer.
Poor Ruby takes the blow instead of Anne as she, who will apparently be going to Queens with Anne and Gilbert – only in order to remain close to him (poor unfortunate soul), is desperate to receive any advance from him. I really don’t want her to suffer, but here she is now, crying about him not noticing her. I almost want her to not end up going to Queens, as that will most probably be the place where Shirbert’s relationship will finally bloom, and I don’t want her to witness that. [AWAE Ruby would have loved to be Book!Ruby, as she gets much more attention from him there - but she doesn’t care as much. However, seeing as how Book!Ruby ends up, AWAE Ruby should be glad she’s not quite her.]
Anne “bet[s she] can help” Ruby’s Gilbert issue – but if she is the root of the problem and she doesn’t know it, how can she possibly be of any use to poor Ruby?
I’ve never seen Anne ignore someone so hard as she just did Moody – he greeted her and she barely turned her head in his direction, muttering a quick “Hi” before returning to her conversation with the girls… good thing he is not one of her suitors. Although she doesn’t pay much more attention to Gilbert, you know. 
I see Moody has grown up a lot since last time he was seen, and he’s now a close second to Gilbert, at least the way I see it. That’s quite a glow up he’s had. But I kinda wanted Diana and Jerry to be a thing – and now I’m low-key shipping her with Moody “your dress is very… blue” Spurgeon. The poor guy has always been awkward around her; it’s obvious he likes her. [See, I told you I only ship couples that have explicit signs of potential to happen. Even though Diana and Moody didn’t happen even for a second, I’ve apparently seen something in her and Jerry stemming from that one single conversation they had. I mean, he did call her ‘the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen’, so that must have been what made me ship them - even before I had the slightest idea they were going to be a thing this season. I still can’t get over the fact that they were not endgame. In my mind, at least, they are - somewhere in that future we didn’t get to see.]
 And now the super famous “take notice” scene between Anne and Gilbert is happening… oh the tension. [You know, this scene reminds me of Vanessa Hudgens’ Rather Be with You. If you haven’t heard that song, go listen to it and then try to tell me I’m wrong here.]
Anne was apparently talking about Ruby in this scene, and Gilbert was blabbing on about “the right person” and stuff… Shirbert is on!!
Well, that was a turn of events! The second Anne mentions Ruby you can actually see Gilbert’s emotions change. Kudos to Lucas for portraying that only with his eyes. How to those kids do that? 
And poor Ruby has been observing him during the conversation, of course… she is so deluded, the unfortunate thing – she thinks his reluctance to post means he’s looking for a much more romantic advance to make… Poor thing. Shirbert will break her heart and might just ruin her friendship with Anne forever… and she dies young in canon. I just hope Moira finds a way to give her the happy ending she deserves… [And, as we know, Moira didn’t disappoint there. I’m so glad things turned out for Ruby the way they did]
Jerry can read long complicated texts now… he’s reading Frankenstein [Little did I know how important this book would be for his story arc this season], for goodness’ sake! I stan one (1) beautiful [inside and out] French farm boy!! And I ship him with Diana even more now. Although if her parents won’t allow her a future minister, how will they allow a farm boy?
Diana has actual royal ancestry… but that ancestry is “keeping [her] from Queens; from [Anne]”. Isn’t this a tragical Bro-mance right there? It is indeed.
Marilla is helping Mary with the baby… makes me wonder if she has been dreaming of one for so long but never got to have it and this is why she’s so attached to this one… this series is beautiful but dramatic… it really tugs on my heartstrings.
Diana stands up for herself and her own wishes in front of her parents… but she doesn’t achieve more than angering them that way… poor little rich girl, indeed.
Also, I just love how the Barrys express their anger. Diana sits at the piano and starts playing angrily, while her mother embroiders angrily and her father reads his newspaper angrily. [I had no idea two out of those three things could be done angrily. I’ll leave it to you to figure out which two.]
The Take Notice board has a note on it saying “Susan has her sight on Moody Spurgeon”. Who is this Susan and why is she eyeing Moody if he’s courting Diana?
Anne is super excited about turning 16… “Once upon a time this was the happiest day of my parents’ life”. I really want her to find out about her ancestry eventually. But I want her and Gilbert to finally get together more. [Of course, both of these will happen in this season. I sort of knew that even back then.]
Let’s sum up: Anne has beautiful hair, but, more importantly, dreams of finding out her family history; Ruby has it bad for Gilbert - but we already knew that; Ka’kwet and her father make their first appearance and create tension in the process; Billy is racist on top of everything - but we all expected that; courting is in full swing; Rachel Lynde plays matchmaker; lots of tension caused by the Take Notice board; eye (and eyebrow) acting; Jerry reads Frankenstein; Marilla is a really good mother, and not only to Anne; who’d have known embroidery and reading could be done angrily; who is Susan; Anne is nearing 16 and things are about to change forever.
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zuzuslastbraincell · 3 years
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☕ Aang.
He's a character I don't see you talk about much, so I'm curious about you thoughts on him, his character arc, what you like or dislike about him, etc.
The short answer: Love Aang. He’s great! Feel like a lot of the dislike of his character (while fading, at least in the circles I’m in) is misplaced. People who think Aang didn’t make the right end game decisions don’t understand his character / miss the point, IMO. That said, dislike some of the character decisions especially r.e. Katara/Aang.
The longer answer: I really love Aang and I feel like the hate he receives from various parts of the fandom is very unwarranted, though I wonder if it stems from watching the show as a child his age and finding his playfulness unrelatable - like as a kid I might have found it exasperating but as an adult I find it very refreshing and it is so obvious to me that Aang is A Child, it informs how he behaves and his decisions massively, and I wonder if the dislike comes from the lack of perspective and being unable to view Aang as a kid, being kids themselves when these haters watched the show?
That said, all kinds of people do dismiss Aang as immature and it frustrates me to no end, because being cynical =/= maturity, a willingness to make difficult decisions that betray deeply held beliefs =/= maturity, and Aang’s decision to stick to his beliefs should always be viewed in tandem with the context that he is a victim of genocide, that genocide includes the destruction of a culture’s common beliefs and practices too, and whether those beliefs live or die in the future starts and ends with him.
Additionally, I feel like Aang does possess a lot of emotional maturity for his age, even if he has bouts of being immature (like, normal, honestly). Like he processes his anger in a way that is largely healthy, actually? I think that’s a thing most people don’t understand, they don’t see that as part of Aang, when really Aang processes his emotions like someone who’s had very clear healthy models for it. He does feel anger, and grief. When Aang tells Katara in the southern raiders episode vengeance isn’t the way, that’s something that he’s fought hard internally to believe in, that’s something that he’s learned.
Tying into that, I think an overlooked aspect of Aang’s development is how in season 1 Aang spent a lot of time looking for Fire Nation citizens who were good / who could be good, because the idea that the Fire Nation is fundamentally evil contradicts his world view (”the monks taught us all life was sacred”), but I think that was probably a perspective he clung onto as well as a way of dealing with his grief. Like, I feel like Aang has fought hard to reaffirm his beliefs in a world that seems determined to “prove him wrong”, surrounded with characters who largely don’t share or understand them & see it as naivety because they lack perspective and have only known war / understand the brutality of the opponent they’re facing on a personal level. I think we don’t see a lot of this explicitly, it’s largely subtext and often an internal debate -- Aang doesn’t have many people to soundboard these kind of thoughts off, there’s no one who is an air nomad or of a similar kind of upbringing around.
Tbh I feel that Aang is best in season 1, largely because his developments in later seasons also incorporate his feelings about Katara as part of his general development, and if I’m just completely honest with you all, I mean no disrespect to Katara/Aang folks you’re cool in my books but I’m just not sold by it at all. For example, because Aang’s journey mastering the avatar state involves him reckoning with his earthly attachments and the idea of letting go, and that conflict revolves around his feelings for Katara, and because I am not particularly sold by Aang and Katara, that impacts on how I view that whole arc. I love a good friends to lovers arc where the depth of those feelings extends to both friendship and romance but I feel like the way ATLA writes romantic arcs often involves a character suddenly looking at another with heart eyes and very little actual bonding to justify that sudden change, very few *journeys* or *arcs* that culminate in feelings (unrelated, but this is my theory as to why Zuko is shipped with almost everyone, because he literally has several life-changing journeys with other characters at the tail end of S3), and it’s fairly unconvincing / pretty flat to me? Especially since we do not get anywhere near as much an insight into Katara’s feelings in that regard? I get that romance isn’t always a grand arc or whatever but given that it’s tied to a lot of Aang’s S2 development, I think it ought to have more prominence.
If I’m honest, I also feel like Aang’s development regarding Katara and the Avatar State was incomplete, and that made a lot of his S3 development frustrating because in other aspects I think he came into his own and matured - usually in subtle ways, like his attitude in the Southern Raiders, but also we see him from being understandably upset about having to hide his identity, to incorporate aspects of Fire Nation dress into his final late S3 look - but in that aspect, his arc felt incomplete to me? This might be a poor reading of it, but to expand on how I see it, in S2, Aang is incapable of letting go of Katara until literally the most critical moment, when he has to -- at which point, he is struck down by chance. In S3, the concept of entering into the Avatar State being a matter of difficulty is literally not mentioned, so we can presume he’s come to terms with letting go of Katara - which directly contradicts the pushy behaviour he shows in Ember Island Players, the way he ignores her boundaries? And then that’s literally never addressed, Aang never apologises, Katara and Aang never have an important conversation resolving the conflict there, and in the end Aang gets the girl? It’s frustrating.
Like, the way I see it, “letting go” of Katara shouldn’t mean putting no importance on her - I actually like the idea of Aang not being willing to leave his friends behind, his compassion and care is important in this aspect. Rather, if I were in the writer’s chair, I would have it that “letting go” means a willingness to face rejection. Aang lets go of a romantic prospect of Katara - and acknowledges she can and might reject him, and that’s always a possibility, but opens his heart to her anyway out of trust (and when they get together, it’s not because he’s proven himself worthy, but because Katara wants to be with him). I think that would have been such a monumentally *powerful* message, especially in a late 00s cartoon, prior to the likes of Adventure Time and Gravity Falls quite explicitly deconstructing the idea of the male protagonist always getting with their crush (I feel like a vital context new viewers miss r.e. Katara/Aang is that the male protagonist would always always get with the girl in cartoons, it always happened, to the extent that female characters existed as much as love interests as characters in their own rights). I honestly don’t think it would even require that much in terms of change! I might show that in S3 Aang still has difficulty with the Avatar state at times - he can go into it at will, but not always - and that’s because he’s in the process of letting Katara as a crush go. I’d still keep the kiss in Day of Black Sun - tbh, I have no issues there, he thought he’d never see her again quite possibly, he’s impulsive, it makes sense - but I’d maybe highlight a slight awkwardness afterwards. I might even keep the awful Ember Island Players conflict - but crucially, I think Aang would have to learn from this. I think when Aang might realise he’s still struggling with the Avatar state as late as Sozin’s Comet episode 1, panic, realise he needs to internalise that belief more, and I think he’d leave Katara a note - including an apology for his actions before, for pushing her when she wasn’t ready, but explaining also, that he needs to go on a journey by himself to figure this out. Rest of Sozin’s comet goes ahead as normal, more or less. I’d end with Katara, maybe at the tea shop afterwards, talking to Aang and asking him why he went off by himself, explaining that she & the gaang would be there for him, he didn’t have to go on a journey alone. Aang would explain that he didn’t expect they’d understand, they’re not monks, and Katara explaining that maybe they wouldn’t, but he could *try*, that’s a risk you sometimes take (but concedes they could have been more understanding). And I think over that conversation it hits Aang it’s not about being alone. Everything’s connected. It’s about not clinging on. it’s about being willing to lose. It’s about trust. I think by the end, they agree to try and communicate better, and Aang then asks Katara out - mirroring “Do you want to go penguin sledding with me?”, similar kind of activity. He almost tries to over-explain and say ‘listen it doesn’t have to go anywhere’ but Katara just smiles and says yeah. And they leave to go on their first real date.
Anyway that’s how I *would* have handled it and that is what I think could be an interesting and compelling arc that wouldn’t take much adjustment to add. Aang is afraid of losing Katara, and realising that he can and might lose her is important.
.... that’s way more than I intended to write but yeah. I feel like a lot of Aang’s development ties in with his feelings for Katara and that’s where I take issue.
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kewltie · 4 years
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“So this is where you���re hiding, Freckles.”
Startled, Izuku swivels around and sees an approaching dark figure cloaked by the shadows of the Astronomy Tower. “Touya,” he says, warmth resting on the surface of his chest. “What are you doing here?”
“Your little friends were running around like headless chickens looking for you all dinner,” Touya says with a careless shrug.
Izuku winces. “I wasn’t hungry.”
Touya’s legs carry him right beside Izuku. Elbows brace on the railings as he leans his back against it, adopting a casual and dismissive posture, but the intensity of his focus is all on Izuku. “Did the Angry Bird do something to upset you again?”
Izuku’s lips thin out and he looks away briefly, unwilling to meet to meet Touya's expectant gaze.
Silence.
“Ah,” Touya clicks his tongue knowingly, “should I kick his ass for you?” he offers, flexing his right hand pointedly. He always liked to resort to his fists more than his wand to get his point across, even though Izuku knows he’s arguably one of the best duelists in Hogwarts.
Coolly indifference and aloof, Todoroki Touya neither stood out nor slipped under the radar completely. Purposely not showing off all cards he wields, keeps all his secrets and talents close to his chest. It’s something that upset the Todoroki patriarch gravely, which is precisely why Touya never give his all to any of his classes. The hateful mind games that Touya often play with his father is equally confusing and troubling.
Izuku has little hope in ever understanding it.
“No, thank you,” he politely declines, turning back to look at the stars once more. It’s quiet up here. Just the perfect place to hide and sulk in peace. Mostly. “I think I’m more upset with myself than him. I stupidly thought that we were far past that now.”
Touya doesn’t say anything to that; his face is a placid mask of inscrutableness. The only sound that cut through the air between them as silence reigns is the steady rhythm of Touya’s fingers tapping against the metal railing.
He waits patiently for Izuku to continue.
“I-I,” Izuku chokes up on the hurt he had been nursing all day, “I forgave him a long time ago because, you know, for all his arrogance and sense of superiority over lowblood muggleborns like me he wasn’t necessarily cruel. He just didn’t like the idea of having a mate this weak.” He can still vividly recall the revulsion in Katsuki’s eyes when even at six, Izuku still hadn’t shown a trace of magic in him. “Kacchan is practically a wizarding world royalty; a strong pureblood lineage with a powerful tie to a magical beast. His mate should be someone of his worth and standing, but he got me instead.” He laughs humorlessly. “No wonder he had hated me back then. I was a squib for the first ten years of my life before I met Professor Toshinari,” he says. It’s not as much of a black stained of his past anymore, something he’d long accepted it, but the scar is still fresh in his heart. “Then coming to Hogwarts I was sorted into the house he’d thought was the weakest and most pathetic.”
For someone as prideful as Katsuki to have to settle for a mate like him, it must have been a crushing blow to realize this at such a young age. It was no surprised to Izuku that Katsuki had chosen spurn him, but even as he gets the why of it all, it doesn’t make it any less hurtful then and now.
He wraps his arms around himself as though it can protect him from the memories of those painful first years. Alone and adrift with nobody to lean on, Izuku had fought long and hard to earn his place and friends he got now, but in his darkest moment he doesn’t feel it is enough.
Katsuki always manages to shine brightly no matter where he is and who is around him. So strong and smart and a juggernaut in magical power, he is Izuku’s ultimate goal. He didn’t even dare to dream to being Katsuki’s mate just as long as he was allowed to stand by his side, but even that was an unforgiveable wish.
“S-sometimes, I think he only bothers to even look at me now is because I’m not that useless little squib anymore,” Izuku confesses his deepest and darkest fear, setting it free into the world at last—the thing that had haunted his dreams for so long. “He never shown any romantic interest in me and now suddenly he wants to take me to the Yule Ball?” he demands heatedly. “Without even asking any of my opinion on it?! Especially when he’d told me how he hated the idea of having a mate in the first place because he was stuck with someone like me!”
Upset swiftly gives way to a deep seeded hurt as he recalls that afternoon in the library and the look on Katsuki’s face when Izuku outright rejected his assumption that they were going to the Yule Ball together.
He didn’t bother to ask. Didn’t seem to care about how Izuku feel at all. 
“He’s a stupid, arrogant little shit,” Touya says cuttingly. It’s the first words he had spoken since he’d let Izuku took over their conversation. “Should have hexed him when I saw him earlier.” His fingers curl tightly around the handrail.
Izuku smiles crookedly. “Please don’t.”
“Some people aren’t worthy of your forgiveness, Freckles,” Touya states quietly, but the words carry weight. It hangs heavy in the air between them like a knife edge. The words are meant for Katsuki, but the intent behind it is aim as much toward Todoroki Enji as Touya, himself.
His knuckles go white as the railing seems to bend under force of Touya’s resolution, because for all his callousness toward the world, Touya is even harsher to himself.
“That depends on me, doesn’t it?” Izuku muses, looking at Touya pointedly. “Don’t I get to decide that?”
“Not everyone deserves your kind of absolution,” Touya bites back. “There is a wretched lot of people in this world who should just be left alone to rot in their sins.”
Izuku heaves a sigh, turning around to face Touya with grim determination. “Kacchan had messed up, and I was hurt because of it,” he admits, “but I don’t think he did it out of malicious intent. Ignorant, yes, but hardly cruel. If he was anything like that, he wouldn’t have to look so wounded when I confronted on it. Acknowledgement is the first step to righting a wrong. Regret is the second.” He smiles softly at Touya, carefully running a hand down his scarred arm covered up by his robe—a crisscrossing map of untold violent left behind by a sectumsempra curse thrown his way.
Touya doesn’t flinch, but it’s a near thing. That bloody night was only a year ago, but it’s still have been still fresh in his mind.
“I forgave Kacchan for how he had mistreated me, and I forgave you, Touya, for the wounds you’ve given me.” His smile widens as Touya deliberately turns his gaze away, his fingers tapping an insistent beat that ring into the night. “It may be stupid of me, but I feel lighter for it. Now, forgiving yourself is another matter entirely,” he says cheerfully.
Touya raises a hand to his face and groans into it. “Are we still talking about Bakugou or is this some kind of subtext I’m supposed to read between the lines?”
“Both,” Izuku answers with a grin.
“Your hopeless optimism is truly revolting,” he grumbles, flexing his hand once more.
“I try,” Izuku says, lips twitching. He glances down at Touya’s hand, clenching and unclenching around the handrail. It has been twitchy all night. “You know, I can see you trying to resist lighting up a smoke. Just do it already.” He shrugs.
It’s a habit Touya unfortunately had picked up since he’d seen it in a film in Muggle Studies—a class he’d chosen mostly to rile up his father and to go against his family’s pureblood code, but Izuku thinks it’s also because he’s actually like it.
Tenya, who is also in that class, always came back with a complaint about how weird it is that a seventh year Slytherin pureblood like Todoroki Touya, who adopted the moniker Dabi just to spite his father, easily took to Muggle Studies and even bother to go to Izuku for tutoring on it.
Izuku simply shook his head and smiled in answer to his friend's general confusion. It’s the same way he also responded when they question of his strange and enigmatic friendship with a rebellious Slytherin boy two years his elder, an outcast even to his own house.
It’s not so much that Izuku won’t answer, it’s because he can’t.
Their friendship is as mysterious to outsiders as it is to them. There is Touya. who comfortably and easily wields the dark arts like he was bred for it and just on the edge of slipping over to the dark side completely, and Izuku, who is born to the light and destine to forever fight the Dark Lord until one of them die, who stand on the opposing side—the Savior of the Wizarding World and the One Who Will Fall; Izuku and Touya. Touya and Izuku.
Opposite and opposed in their ideals. But that is not all they are. Not all they have chosen to be.
Touya, who had found Izuku at his worst, saw a crumbled mess in the boy’s bathroom in Izuku’s first year when he was beaten by the older students for his polluted blood and his lack of magic, and had broken all the bullies’ arms that night as he laughed at their pain and suffering.
This was how they met, Izuku who had suffered under their cruelty and Touya who had dealt the callous hand victory. One fell victim to violent and other begot it. 
Touya didn’t do it for Izuku, he didn’t even know Izuku then. But to an eleven years old who was far away from home and didn’t have a single friend who he could turn to that first few months, Touya was his saving grace even when he couldn’t rightfully call Touya a friend then.
So, no, Izuku couldn’t explain his friendship with Touya, not for the scars that Touya had given him and certainly not for the way he would sometimes catch Touya looking at him with such inscrutable longing in his eyes that Izuku’s heart would throb at the sight of it.
His friends had strongly tried to discourage it, Katsuki had tried to forbid it, and even Touya’s youngest brother, Shouto, had tried to warn him against it, yet here they both are alone and sharing the same space in the Astronomy Tower, and Izuku has never felt safer.
“No.” Touya scowls, stilling his anxious hands that have been itching to hold a cigarette all night. “I won’t smoke.”
Izuku blinks. “Why not?”
He grimaces and looks heavenward as though Izuku was being frustrating on purpose. “You don’t like it,” Touya finally says.
“Oh,” he says stupidly for lack of any better word
“Don’t read into it,” Touya snaps with a furious, embarrassed growl.
Izuku stifles a giggle as he says, “Too late.”
Touya scowls even harder now. “So are you going to let me know if I should punch Bakugou or not?” he says, trying to divert the topic to Izuku’s earlier problem. “I don’t mind teaching him a lesson.”
Holding back a sigh, Izuku roll his eyes. “I said already no, so please don’t pick a fight with him.”
Katsuki is already annoyed at the thought of Izuku and Touya’s somewhat amicable relationship in public so if he finds out that they actually often meet up in the Astronomy Tower alone to have a heart to heart talk often that Izuku couldn’t even share with his closest friends, he would be beyond furious. Enough to even trigger to his veela’s anger and set the castle on fire, possibly.
“Then are you going to go to the Yule ball with him?” Touya asks with a pinched look on his face, like the thought of it pain him, but he has to ask, anyway.
Izuku frowns. “Yes, wait—no. Maybe, I don’t know.” He shakes his head. “The pain is still fresh right now, so I’m not sure I can say yes if he asks me again this instant.”
“And what if he apologizes?” he presses.
Izuku chews on his lower lip in thought. “Well, perhaps then. But I might not even go to the Yule Ball at all. It only gives me headache so far.” Why does the Yule Ball require dates, anyway? So embarrassing and stressful. 
Touya sighs, rolling his head back. “Who cares, just go with your friends instead. Screw Bakugou and his stupid feathers brain.”
Izuku pouts, crossing his arms. “All my friends got a date for the ball. I would be the awkward third wheel in the group.”
“You kids and your teenage drama,” he mutters like he isn’t one himself as Izuku sulks beside him. A significant beat passes between them, then, quietly, he says, “Just go with me then.”
Izuku opens his mouth, stops, and opens it again. “You hate this kind of thing,” he accuses, staring at Touya with heavy skepticism. The Todoroki likes to host a lot of these social functions as the premier pureblood family in wizarding society and Touya can’t stand any of it, always finding a way to either crash it or avoid it as much as possible.
“I do,” he admits grimly.
Izuku’s brows furrow. “Then why?”
He straightens up, pushes himself away from the railings, and turns to Izuku with a glare. “Because I’ll do it for you.”
“Oh,” Izuku says again, and just as stupid as the first time around. “Oh.” And blushes furiously, hoping Touya can’t see any of it. Merlin, he hopes the moon and the stars are the only witnesses to his embarrassment. “W-well, um,” he starts, grasping for an answer as his brain frizz out at the sudden proposal, “you know that is, uh, I would love to, but Kacchan and I, well, we’re—”
A hand flies toward his face and almost crashing into it as it cuts off the rest of his rambling speech. “Just stop it already, I can see you struggling.” Touya roll his eyes, dropping his hand back to his side. He heaves a sigh, square his shoulders, and stares at Izuku right in the eyes—a stormy sea of turquoise that threaten to swallow Izuku whole if he’s not careful. “If you want to go with Bakugou that’s fine, but if you want to go with someone else, also fine. It doesn’t matter who you take as long as you’re happy,” he tells Izuku firmly. “I’m not asking you to go to the Yule Ball with me. I’m telling you that I’m an option. You can make me your last resort if you don’t want to go alone.”
Ah, there is that throb again, Izuku thinks as he reaches a hand over his heart. “And you’re fine with being use like that? It doesn’t seem quite fair to you.”
Touya’s hand rises like he’s about to reach for Izuku, but it quickly falls and tucks behind his back. “It doesn’t matter to me, Freckles,” he says, shrugging carelessly.
“You’re very kind, Touya,” Izuku tells him as a smile makes it way toward the surface and seemingly settles there permanently in the face of Touya’s scowl. “Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”
“Shut the fuck up. That’s a lie.” Touya glares at him with the full force for ten thousands suns before pointedly diverting his gaze. His cheeks are unusually flushed and somehow Izuku doesn’t think it’s because of the cool air.
An off-kilter Touya is too cute sometimes.
Izuku giggles and extends a hand out to wrap it around Touya’s arm, because he always has to be the first one to do it since that horrid night that had led to a hundred cut on Izuku. He has to be the one to reach out first. “C’mon I’ll treat you to some dessert in the kitchen. The house-elves always leave something extra for me just in case I wanted a snack.”
“That’s because they love you,” Touya grumbles, but allows himself to be dragged along. He would always put up a fuss about it like he couldn’t be bothered, but he doesn’t have in him to ever reject Izuku’s hand on him. Never.
For someone capable of so much violence and hatred toward the world and himself, Touya tries to be ever so careful with Izuku. So gentle that it hurts sometimes. Izuku isn’t breakable in any way, but the way Touya is so devoted to not consciously reach out for him unless Izuku instigate it first and only when he let himself give in to Izuku’s touch, his resistance crumbles away so easily like his resolve was held up by faulty walls; it’s heartbreaking.
Touya may not understand why Izuku was so quick to forgive him for the scars that he has now, but it’s because Touya made it so easy to do it when he’d visit Izuku’s hospital bed every night afterward to watch over his sleep like a silent sentinel. He didn’t say a single word to Izuku during those nights, but his guilt was palpable. It was carved into the lines of his shoulders, into the agony of his eyes, and into his flesh and bones, because after that horrific night when Izuku bled in the Great Hall, Izuku wasn’t the only one who had his own scars.
Touya’s own just aren’t visible to the eyes. 
So it’s not that Izuku’s heart is big and capable of so much, it’s because the people who seek his forgiveness want it so badly that to look at their face is to stare into their open wound—yearning, hopeful, and so full of self-loathing.
He had seen it first in Touya. Then in Katsuki.
That’s why he will mostly likely forgive Katsuki after this when he stops being so dumb and stubborn and decide to come to Izuku for another chance, but till then he would like to see some groveling done first because Izuku may be kind and open-hearted like everyone say he is, but he’s no pushover in the end. 
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screechthemighty · 4 years
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FR Octane is 100% one of those characters where I can see all the building blocks of WHY he behaves the way he does, but also acknowledge that his behavior is...Bad, it’s not great. And guess what, I accidentally wrote an essay about it if anyone cares! (Listen, I paid a lot of money for an arts degree, if I can’t over-analyze everything then that money was wasted, humor me) ETA: also if you’re thinking of dragging me for this post, please read this first and consider not doing that.
 We’re going to be looking at two big aspects of his character for this analysis. One is more subtext than actual text, but since all the evidence is there (and, if how they handled Wattson’s autism is any indication, will likely never be canon regardless of all the evidence) we’re just going to treat it as canon for the sake of argument. The other one is paracanon which, to be fair, isn’t as canon as “evidence actually in the text”, but again, for the sake of argument, we’ll treat it as such.
Fact the first: Octane, most likely, has ADHD. From the way he behaves, I’m assuming it is either undiagnosed OR he was never adequately taught how to manage his symptoms. The most relevant symptoms to this discussion are his seeming overreaction to Lifeline teasing him (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria being a common ADHD symptom), his persistent and VERY canon inability to handle boredom, and his equally persistent and canon poor impulse control (especially related to the boredom but in this case it also goes hand in hand with the previously mentioned RSD).
Fact the second: He grew up in an emotionally neglectful and dysfunctional home--his dad had multiple re-marriages (and lbr, probably was cheating on his current wife with the next wife every single time), he was raised more by an assistant who didn’t care to learn his wants and needs, so on, so forth. IMHO, this fact does explain both his larger than life personality AND manipulative behavior. If he stands out and acts out, he gets the attention he craves. If he’s manipulative, he can actually get what he wants/needs from the uncaring adults in his life. He behaves badly because of childhood trauma.
So, with all of these facts in mind, here’s the sequence of events:
Octane is relegated to a task he considers painfully boring (keeping in mind that boredom is one of the worst sensations for the ADHD brain). He is forced to stay in said task by an authority figure who doesn’t listen to his input about what he’d rather be doing or what tasks he might be better suited for.
On top of that, he is teased by someone he considers a close friend (practically family by his own admission) in a way that a) makes light of the situation he finds uncomfortable and b) compares him to an “accountant”, something that is anathema to what he wants to be. Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria kicks in; the comment becomes genuinely hurtful and not just slightly unfunny but well-meaning ribbing.
His intolerance for boredom says “no, we’re not doing that task anymore, let’s go do the fun thing.” Poor impulse control and no buffer to mitigate the effects of poor impulse control say, “the first thought to pop into my head is right, let’s get that dopamine!”
His manipulative tendencies say, “If I make a big fuss, do something stupid, and let Ajay know it’s partially because she was mean to me, then she’ll understand that she hurt me and feel bad about it.” Unresolved trauma means that he doesn’t even THINK to communicate that to her, which would be the HEALTHY thing to do but likely not a method that has ever worked for him in childhood. Instead, he leaves an emotionally manipulative letter and peaces out. 
As of right now, we don’t know what the ULTIMATE outcome is (my money is on him getting his ass kicked TBH). But the IMMEDIATE outcome is that Lifeline feels responsible for something that isn’t her fault and now she and Gibraltar are both going to be put at risk of getting hurt. Octane has also put himself in a position where he’ll probably be hurt. This isn’t going to end well, is what I’m getting at.
NOW. Here’s the thing. The two facts I listed up above are not his fault. Him having ADHD? Not his fault. Him not getting the right help he needed as a child? Not his fault. Him growing up in a dysfunctional environment that had a negative impact on his emotional and interpersonal development? DEFINITELY not his fault. Everything about his behavior based on those two facts makes sense, and I’m not gonna sit here and act like he’s a bad person for being a neurodivergent abuse victim.
But, to paraphrase the very smart Jessica “How to ADHD” McCabe, it may not be his fault, but it is his responsibility--in this case “it” being how he treats other people, which is very much within his control. I get WHY he did it, but he IS being an absolute ass to Lifeline for the second time (that we know of), and that IS wrong. He HAS to learn at some point to not be like this. It’s already temporarily lost him a friendship, and it COULD get him or someone else killed this time around. He’s a grown adult, and despite my/the fandom’s jokes, he does have all his brain cells. At some point he’ll have to realize he can’t treat people like this and adjust his behavior.
To be fair to Octane, I completely understand and acknowledge that getting help and admitting to the things clogging up your brainspace is incredibly hard. Trust me, I have firsthand experience with this one, and my problems are small potatoes in comparison to what’s going on with him. So he’s not necessarily a bad person for not having taken those steps, especially because I’m still not sure he REALIZES he has a problem. Now, if he knew that he was hurting people and continued doing so because “that’s just who I am, they’re the ones who are wrong, actually” against all evidence, then that IS him shirking his responsibilities to other people and himself and I could criticize him for that. But I don’t think he’s at that point yet. Right now he just seems oblivious, which, yeah, we’ve all been in that position where you’re oblivious to your problems even as they’re slowly burning your house down (I cringe looking back on childhood me exhibiting early anxiety symptoms that went unchecked until now, when I’m well past college age).
I also think it would be helpful if someone told him in a CONSTRUCTIVE manner that his behavior is worrying and was able to help him get to that place where he can realize that himself and get help (not saying they should bear the majority of the emotional weight, AM saying that he seems like he needs the extra help and that’s valid, all things considered). Unfortunately...pretty much everyone in Apex Legends is their own flavor of messed up and they ARE in the middle of a crisis, so they’re likely either unable to see it or unable to help because y’know, lot going on.
In conclusion: I say none of this to demonize Octane? I say it because a) I think his character is really neat, flaws and all, hence me referring to him as a “problematic icon”, and b) because I think it does a disservice to his character to ignore his flaws. I don’t want him to be turned from a complex character with a lot of neat stuff going on to an uwu tortured sad boy who’s never at fault. I haven’t seen anyone do that YET (everyone seems to love him for being a trash baby and that’s valid), but, y’know, doesn’t hurt to start the conversation preemptively.
(QUICK sidebar that I didn’t think of until I was tagging his: his privilege as a rich child from a rich family definitely is a contributing factor to his behavior and another stumbling block to him getting help for a lot of reasons? I won’t go into all my thoughts on this because that could be its own essay but tl;dr Rich People often don’t believe in consequences as it is and don’t like to admit to being wrong, and some of this definitely wore off on Octane and is exacerbating the rest of it.)
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Mayday IS NOT a Mary Sue!
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I’ve heard this assertion before and it’s just bullshit.
To tackle this topic I’m going to crank the dial up to ‘Very difficult’ and strictly look at Mayday’s debut in What If…v2 #105. Were I to take her entire character history into consideration the accusation would crumble like wet paper.
Now, there is no absolute definitive definition of what a Mary Sue is, though there are broad overlaps between the definitions. Those overlaps really boil down to an over idealized character/female character (the male equivalent is Gary Stu or Marty Stu).
For the purposes of this discussion (and because this is what I’ve seen the accusations revolve around), the idea of her being a Mary Sue hinges upon three key points:
She is not flawed
Everyone likes her
And
She masters her powers/wins her first fight with no difficulty
Let’s tackle them each at a time.
She lacked personality flaws?
Well she seemed a bit of a hothead, rather melodramatic and arguably (because she planned on returning to action) deceitful at the very end of the story. She also considered herself a freak and was upset that her athletic accomplishments were the result of her powers not her own hard work. And of course her sense of self was radically rocked when she learned her father was Spider-Man.
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Whilst not a personality flaw per se, a source of contention in her life was that she didn’t fit in neatly with any of the school cliques. She was smart enough to hang with the nerds but also athletic enough to hang out with the jocks and as a result was forced to choose between them. This in turn hurt her romantic prospects the boy she liked, Brad Miller.
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This is integral to the story because through her alter ego Mayday can combine her intellect and athleticism and be her truest self.
Ah, but does this not then reinforce the accusation that everybody likes her? Poor Mayday. Her problem is too many  people like her. Cry me a river right?
Well, hold on a minute. Why is the idea of people liking the character a mark of a Mary Sue in the first place? It can’t just be a realism issue as many characters can be celebrities or beloved public figures. Bruce Wayne (out of costume) and Wonder Woman are beloved by most of the general public. So is Thor, Captain America and arguably Tony Stark and ¾ of the Fantastic Four.
Obviously villains dislike them though. In this vein then Normie Osborn in What if v2 #105 would dispel the accusation. But let’s be honest, that’s a little cheap isn’t it? Obviously villains aren’t going to like the hero, they wouldn’t be effective villains if they did *glares at Kylo Ren*.
So why are those characters not regarded as Mary Sue’s then? Well, the simple answer would be that the general adoration from others isn’t really that big of a deal for most of those characters. The general public do not strictly speaking need to like the F4 (and in fact have vacillated in their opinion of them), they just need to be famous.
In contrast Spider-Man had a poor public reputation due to Jameson and this is regarded as a hallmark of the character. It’s such a hallmark that it made it into the first 2 movies and later in Spider-Girl the fact that she had a far better public image was highlighted more than once.
So what’s going on here?
Well basically a character is a Mary Sue when everybody loves them at it either serves no story purpose, or if it’s a cheap way of conveying how much the audience should love a character. Or if it makes the character’s lives easier without them putting any work into it.
To give you an example from anime Son Goku and Usagi Tskunio (from Dragon Ball and Sailor Moon respectively, two of the most popular anime ever) typically made friends easily and even converted enemies into allies more than once.
Does this make them Mary Sues?
No, because the people who became friends or allies didn’t just immediately or easily evolve into those roles. Work and effort was put into that by Goku and Usagi respectively. They endured pain or displayed bravery or sacrifice or put their hearts on the line to convince someone to bet better
Now, I’m not saying Mayday’s popularity came about through methods like that. We do not know how Mayday became as popular as she is, though we can easily infer it’s due to her athleticism, physical attractiveness and brains. She’d fit into multiple cliques in school so it’s not unbelievable that her company would be desired by them.
What ultimately disproves her as a Mary Sue in this regard though is that there is a price to pay for that popularity. She is forced to choose between the groups and thus undermine friendships with one group or another. And she can never fully be herself…until she becomes Spider-Girl that is.
Basically Mayday being popular doesn’t make her a Mary Sue because it comes at a personal cost. Her life would honestly be easier if she was just a jock or a nerd.
Of course the counterpoints to that are that it’s a pretty minor concern all things in the grand scheme of life. And if she brings those two halves together as Spider-Girl then she’s solved her problem hasn’t she?
Well for starters, not fitting in exactly with any one group, undermining one set of friendships due to servicing another, juggling those social circles?
That might be a piece of cake next to what Peter Parker dealt with in high school, but for many teenagers it is actually pretty important.
In much the same way that scale matters in super powered conflicts, scale matters in terms of emotional conflicts too. We might argue May has it easier than Peter, but Peter had it arguably easier than the X-Men, or the Silver Surfer or ben Grimm. This is why his romantic or financial struggles were as compelling as (if not more so than) those of the Avengers efforts to save the world.
Mayday is 15. She is growing up. She is still figuring out who she is. So yes, her place in the high school hierarchy (especially in 1990s America no less) and social situation would be important to her. And it is she who is ultimately our POV character.
As for the second point about the two halves of her lives, it’s true. Mayday’s emotional conflict of being pulled between two groups reconciles by the end of the story because she bridges the gap. But for starters, let’s remember Mayday was designed to be a done-on-one character with merely the possibility of a continuation. So reconciling her emotional conflict by the end of the story makes a lot of sense narratively. However, the reality is when she became an on-going character it really wasn’t a big deal.
This is because, whilst she bridged that gap as Spider-Girl, she can’t be Spider-Girl ALL the time!
She has to at some point take the mask off ad go to school and in that environment she still needs to juggle not seeming nerdy to the jocks but not seeming like a jock to the nerds. She would still need to sacrifice potential romance and team building experiences with the jocks or sacrifice arguably more substantial friendships she’s held since childhood.
Okay, so being liked by everyone in context  doesn’t render Mayday a Mary Sue.
But surely we cannot defend her fighting prowess? In her first ever encounter with a villain, her first ever fight, her first ever use of the webshooters she won, and seemingly didn’t stumble.
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How can this be defended? Isn’t that at least approaching Rey from the Star Wars sequels levels of unearned skill?
First of all, May should be graded on a curve for the simple reason that she wasn’t invented to be strictly speaking an on-going character. Her whole character arc might’ve begun and ended in What If v2 #105 so given the story, of course we weren’t going to see a training montage.
But even if you ignore that the accusation doesn’t really add up.
For starters it’s pretty obvious her opponent (unlike Rey’s rival, Kylo Ren) was not overly experienced. He seemed to know how to use the weapons in his possession but was clearly emotionally unstable seeing as he was beaten by such an obvious way.
May’s internal thoughts throughout the fight also make it clear she is mostly winging it. She isn’t fighting as effectively as an experienced Spider-Man against an experienced Goblin. She is mostly riding on instinct and her strategy, whilst ultimately effective, is also very rudimentary.
She spots Normie’s gloves are capable of an electrical discharge when she webbed up his hand.
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She knows he uses pumpkin bombs because she saw one when he attacked her earlier; plus it’s likely someone just knows about such an infamous super villain.
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So she waits for him to pull out a pumpkin bomb then webs up his hand again, hoping he’ll react by using his discharge and blowing himself up. 
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Amidst this she needles him to make him emotional and throw him off balance increasing the chances he’ll use his best weapon (the pumpkin bomb) and not think through his actions. 
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Let’s also consider she webs up the same hand twice, which would make Normie consider his reaction even less.
It’s a basic but it got the job done. Mayday wouldn’t have needed to be a genius or an experienced fighter to have come up with that plan.
But as it happens her parents are two people who between them have scientific acumen, strong social skills, a penchant for getting inside people’s heads or under their skin and are very quick witted and resourceful. It’s not really necessary for the story to spell out for us that Mayday could have inherited these traits and/or observed them in practice growing up.*
From a storytelling POV, because we the audience are familiar enough with Peter and MJ (even if you don’t know that many specific stories) that context is part of the subtext of the story. So Mayday possessing those essential skills isn’t a cheap ass pull or anything.
But what about her use of Peter’s powers? She didn’t stumble with them, not even once.
Well, putting aside how the narration makes it clear she’s riding by the skin of her teeth more than once, this is justified when we compare to Peter himself.
I know that in Spider-Man 2002 and Amazing Spider-man 2012 Peter practiced with his powers and did stumble a bit in his use of them. But those were live action movies that demand a certain greater degree of realism because we have actual human beings right in front of us. They were also made 4-14 years after What If v2 #105. Additionally, whilst Maguire and Garfield’s Peter’s did have to stumble a bit, the key phrase there is ‘a bit’. 
They got the hang of their powers pretty quickly, with Maguire’s Peter trouncing Flash Thompson with ease.
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Garfield meanwhile defended himself from people in a tiny subway carriage practically by accident.
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Maguire’s Spidey got the hang of web swinging on his second try.
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For the original 616 Peter Parker, the situation was even easier. IIRC aside from one flashback story showcasing Peter accidentally failing to control his strength, Peter had a handle on all his abilities pretty quickly, including web-swinging. Very  early into his career he held his own against four experienced heroes simultaneously. Specifically the Fantastic Four.
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This was (in publication order) the first ever time Peter battled anyone with powers of their own. And remember, this event is 100% canonical to Spider-Girl’s universe. Her version of Peter Parker (her father) battled the F4 exactly this way.
Ah, but that was written in 1963. Standards weren’t as believable or grounded as they were circa 1998. Well, what about Ultimate Spider-Man from 2000? A series that was actually bucking trends because  it was more grounded and realistic (allegedly)? In this universe Peter had his powers for a while before he first ever super villain battle and had dealt with some petty crooks before.
Nevertheless he too was very effective when he first fought Ultimate Green Goblin. Ultimate Goblin wasn’t great at critical thinking, but he was overwhelming stronger than Peter and more durable. And yet, Peter at the very least held his own in the fight.
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So it seems spider powers don’t require much practice before you can use them in combat. You can at least avoid attacks, hold your own and grasp the basics of web-swinging pretty quickly.
When looking at the 616 version of Spider-Man’s (and by extension Spider-Girl’s) powers this makes a lot of sense.
To begin with wall-crawling was second nature to Peter in the 616 universe and Ultimate Universe.
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More importantly the Spider Sense is a MASSIVE factor in Peter and Mayday’s respective fighting styles and was explicitly a factor in Mayday’s duel with Normie.
The Marvel wiki had this to say about Peter’s spider sense on his main page:
Spider-Sense: Spider-Man possesses a precognitive danger or "spider" sense which warns him of potential or immediate danger by the manifestation of a tingling sensation in the back of his skull, and links with his superhuman kinesthetics, enabling him to evade most any injuries, unless he cognitively overrides his automatic reflexes… Spider-Man's spider-sense is directional and can guide him to or away from hidden weapons and enemies. Sudden and extreme threats can cause his spider-sense to react with painful intensity. Spider-Man can also sense and dodge attacks directed randomly or by an artificial intelligence. Using his spider-sense to time his enhanced reflexes, Spider-Man can casually dodge attacks up to and including automatic-weapons fire, provided there is sufficient distance. His spider-sense is sufficiently well-linked to his reflexes to the point that a threat can trigger them even when Spider-Man is asleep or stunned.
This is further corroborated in ‘The Amazing Spider-Man: The Ultimate Guide Updated Edition’, written by Tom DeFalco, co-creator of What if v2 #105
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Additionally, ASM #656 established that Peter’s Spider Sense helped him greatly when web-swinging by subconsciously guiding his aim towards safe anchor points.**
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So Mayday’s proficiency with her newfound powers is actually not all that surprising. Her Spider-Sense actively compensated for her lack of experience. And if we look at her battle with Normie her predominant tactic is to just dodge and keep him distracted. The latter doesn’t really require training just some common sense and guts. The former is practically the wholesale function of the Spider-Sense in the first place.
Still don’t buy it?
Still think this is all a stretch?
Think that the Spider-Sense is just cheating?
Maybe you think dodging is one thing, but Mayday actively attacks Normie three times in the battle.
She saves herself from freefall and then transitions that into a strike against him.
She webbed up his hand accurate in the midst of the fight twice!
Her ability to do all that in her first fight, with no training, surely proves her for the Mary Sue she is.
Well here is something even I never considered until today…Mayday was already  athletic before  she gained her powers.
Mayday had won herself a spot on the Midtown High girls basketball team.
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The story doesn’t say when this happened but her familiarity with the team and the popular kids not on the team heavily implies she’s been on the team for a while. She talks about possibly getting a shot at scholarship or going pro. This again implies basketball isn’t just a recent new hobby, that she’s been into it for a while; an idea confirmed in her on-going solo book. This is further alluded to when Mayday laments that she believed her athletic skills were the result of training, practice and hard work.
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That line itself implies Mayday has in fact had her powers all along and been unwittingly been using them. This would mean that Mayday had been practicing on the court for many years, giving her a handle on her skills that she could bring to bear against Normie.***
However, earlier in the story Peter and MJ have a shocked reaction to Mayday’s slam dunk. Along with their dialogue this implies Mayday actually didn’t have any powers before the start of the story.
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Regardless, if Mayday trained, practiced and worked hard as a basketball player (and was good enough to make the team) she’d have developed certain skills. Skills that would have been transferable to her duel with Normie.
She’d have developed hand-eye co-ordination. Hence her ability to aim her webs and strikes accurately.
She’d have developed an awareness of the physics of he body. As in what movements in relation to the situation would generate what result. Like for example when she transitioned her swing into a kick.
She’d have had a certain knowledge of basic physics, because she’d need the ball to go where she’d need it to go. As in if she pushes off left with her arms out she should travel X distance. If she curls up her body it will slow her down, etc.
She’d have developed muscle memory and been able to move on instinct. Hence she could still be great at dodging even without her powers.
She would’ve known how to observe terrain and her opponents. E.g. she knew how to use the bridge’s shape to create a pendulum motion and kick Normie. And she knew observed his electrical discharge attack and pumpkin bombs.
She would’ve learned how to use the terrain and her opponents’ strengths and weaknesses to her advantage. Hence she, you know…won the fight.
And she would’ve known how to perform under pressure. She wasn’t thrown off by her powers or Normie’s almost lethal attacks.
All of these factors would’ve served her incredibly well in her fight.
When taken all together NO.
Mayday Parker is not, and was never, a Mary Sue.
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*Mayday’s scientific knowledge would also have served her very well in being able to figure out the right way to move in the battle. For example when she broke her freefall and turned the swing into an attack.
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**We might also speculate it was the Spider-Sense that guided Mayday in how to use trigger the web-shooters through the double-tap mentioned in the story.
Although frankly Spider-Man being such a famous and well documented hero the general public have probably seen him shoot a web and thus know about his famous hand gesture. So Mayday, being intelligent (let alone scientifically clever like her Dad) probably deduced how to activate the web-shooters.
***Not to mention, the scene demonstrates Mayday testing out her powers. So she didn’t walk into battle with Normie completely unaware of what she might be capable of.
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