#i mean. maybe i COULD. i just dont want ppl irl knowing what im up to

[midnight-moth]

Cw death / grief/loss mental health things but tldr all im grateful for all the little people inside my computer/phone

Today is the anniversary of my father’s death. It gives me many complicated feelings that I won’t get into but can be summed up as I hate him but there’s some kind of biologically informed attachment. My mom is also dead. I wanted to write she’s gone but that implies she could come back. I don’t know why but I feel the need to sugar coat the fact that my parents are dead to make the information more palatable for others. I find myself saying things like it’s ok, no don’t apologize.

I end up consoling people after they ask about my family and what I’m doing for the holidays and I inevitably tell them this. In general it’s my instinct to minimize every emotion I have even though I have huge feelings about everything. I also have a lot of empathy. (The stereotype that ASD/nd ppl don’t have empathy is very much BS) So much that it makes it hard for me to not want to console or in some way help every single person I care about if they’re in pain in any way. Like I mean anyone. Online mutuals to irl friends.

So many people have a hard time with the holidays. So many people have a hard time with winter. So many people are just having a hard time. I don’t blame anyone for the way I process these things but between my regular mental health issues, the additional pain that the holidays bring, the dead parents thing, and the collective mental health of everyone around me crumbling, it feels real heavy.

Normally I just disappear. I also dont talk about how I feel. I feel guilty for saying I feel sad. I feel like a burden for expressing any negative emotions. It all inevitably comes spewing out when I feel safe enough with one person to do it. Even then I try to soften the blow of my own trauma.

This is more like a diary entry than a post I want or expect people to read. And it’s because I am sort of saying this into the void of the internet rather than a person so it isn’t attached to the inherent guilt I feel for basically being who I am. I guess I just wanted to vent, but also to say that it doesn’t matter how small it is, every little comment or conversation I have here means something to me. I don’t have a lot of irl friends. (I mean I have like two) one who I got into an argument with when I told them my name and pronouns of choice and it was ugly)) anyways…

I just appreciate all of you. And maybe I should have put that above the cut because everything under it is probably either very triggering or very depressing to read. So sorry if you did venture under here and that happened.

A disclaimer of sorts. I know very well that people see posts like this as attention seeking, validation seeking, whatever. First of all, that’s kind of the opposite of what I want. hence why I don’t express any of these things to anyone irl. I really don’t like having anyone’s focus on me. I don’t want to be perceived most of the time.

But Also, what’s wrong with needing those things? I’m tired of seeing people being shamed because they need care, support, reassurance, love. And shamed for it online. Maybe they can’t find it in real life. Trashing someone for that is really the most despicable thing.

I know this is all very disjointed but whatever if you read all this you deserve a cookie.

#yes the Christmas ghouls cheered me up immensely #cw grief and loss #cw rant

[leejenowrld]

asking this with pure genuine curiosity (ignore if makes u uncomfy or dont get my point bc eng isn't my first language)

well idk if u have a 'minors dni' but what do u think about minors (13-17 years old) reading ur writings or smut in general here in tumblr for example

?

i think that some ppl think that bc someone is minor they're oblivious or they have no idea about anything and maybe these young guys are more experienced.

if im not wrong, im much older than u but basically our generation is the same or at least is similar so, i grow up knowing when my classmates lost their virginities and all of them were minors at the time so, in general is almost the same in other countries.

bc since I've got this account (like +10 years before) and even more since i became part of the kpop community (at my 22, now im older lol), most writers who post smut are under the 'minors dni' and i think is perfect, is not like im against it, but i couldn't stop thinking about the fact that most of these teenagers are not virgins anymore so why they shouldn't read some smut on the internet? like, my point is not that i want minors to read smut or something like that god no, but aaag idk how to put it in words im sorry

like I know is for good, but what's the point of some writers being so angry when someone tell them 'im 17 and i love ur works' bc we dont know each others and sorry idk where im going with this just ignore me. im sending it to u anyways bc i wrote a lot (of nonsense i fear)

minors should not interact with my page. it’s clear and simple. doesn’t matter if they’re 13 or 17, i can go into this deeply but reading about intense smut is very damaging especially if you’re like 14 years old and have never experienced anything like that irl. it gives you misconceptions and false ideas

minors dni is a responsibility we have as writers. such as trigger warnings. we advise and i, along with any other writer, believe it’s for best. we can only advise, we can’t physically stop minors from interacting but yeah i would feel incredibly uncomfortable if minors read my works especially the intensely sexual ones. it’s plain and simple, minor means minor. there’s a reason why age warnings are so common

you’re entire argument being about minors who are in relationships and active sexually or whatever… there’s a whole lot i could go into just about that but i can’t be bothered rn

as for the last paragraph 😭 idk what to say because i haven’t reacted like that so i can’t speak for writers lmfao maybe send the authors who have reacted that way i guess they can explain why lol

[pekodayz]

u ever just want to vent but u dont wanna bc ppl might just find you a vibe killer so u just sit there with ur head throbbing repressing it. ok sorry i need to vent. I’m gonna look back on this in 5 mins and wince

I’ve just been thinking abt how throughout my life well maybe just growing up. I’d be sitting with my friends and someone comes up and compliments one of them, I never gotten that. Well besides my eyebrows. Never my hairstyle, there’s literally nothing wrong with it..I never understood that. Like outside of high school ppl say things now but back then I never was complimented like that. I know this sounds selfish and stupid but I kinda wish someone flirted with me im not ugly right. I know I’m not ugly. all my friends got and still get flirted with, i never gotten that im not ugly right im. I’m pretty ?? Yeah. I’m a pretty gal I wish someone had a crush on me growing up. I will never know, if someone had feelings for me that wasn’t online. Like a real person, who saw my face. I sound so stupid why am I upset about such trivial things. I have a job, friends, ppl that care about me but this is something that has been fucking with me for years. I don’t wear makeup like them. Unless im doing some gyaru shtick. But even then, they still get flirted with. What do I know. I shouldn’t be complaining about this this is shallow. Maybe that’s why over the years I just stopped caring for love and affection and I’m on the ace spectrum now. I lost my ability to even have a crush bc im petrified of what could come of that. I had a crush once in 9th grade and hell, even I knew then I wasn’t worthy of this. I’m never probably gonna have someone be with me and that’s okay. I don’t wanna deal with the heartache. My heart hurts I wish someone would hug me and tell me somethin. Idk what tbh but something would be nice. I’m not lonely but I suppose the feeling of “haha yeah I remember when [name] had a crush on me lol” is kinda endearing. even if it probably was stupid. That’s probably the only things I’m jealous about towards my friends, pretty fucking dumb tho. I’m slowly getting over it, but oughh it’s wrong im gross for thinking that. I’m not mean to ppl irl idk what’s wrong but I don’t really care..that much anymore ig. I’ve come to terms with it, sorry if I sound selfish. More money for me i guess. I wish platonic cuddling was real at least. I’m not touch starved I think I just wanna have somthint in my life. just a little bit :3 ! But it’s okay………I can just be pathetic behind my normal irl persona and talk to a fucking bot to satisfy this pain. I’m glad I have gyaru tho, at least I feel cute..I don’t need to be wanted I think. It’s fun having a mask on. Ughhh. Ok well um sorry if you read through this hellish and disgusting vent . Yeesh! Im pretty, I’ll keep that in my thoughts so I won’t start crying again. EW OKAY UHHHHH emotional amirite! 😯😯😯😯😯😯😯😯

#.vent .. #ok sorry im never ever gonna admit this to anyone irl so it’s better if i say it online lol! #i just buy the cutest shit and wear it indoors. I don’t wanna deal with others. i think I’m kinda ough in the head #ik ai is terrible but those dumbass bots help unfortunately

[terraliensvent]

multiple ppl close to kinah were able to verify that they were in the hospital recovering when the attempt happened. all of those ppl could not collab and lie so one person could get “extra attention” in ur words. Im frustrated with terra staff aswell but that doesn’t mean its ok now to call someones suicide attempt fake so ur feelings seem more valid. I find that extremely sickening. U have zero evidence or good reason for doubt or else u would have vented about it already. all u have is ur feefees. u do need therapy. And mod pls stop validating baseless speculation on smth so serious. what happened 2 people needing proof for claims like this

alright yeah im deleting kinah asks now

first off i dont think that people should just believe whatever they read on the internet, because you dont know who these people are irl. again, thats not to say that you shouldnt give support where you can or that you should make public callouts saying that it was all fake when you dont know for sure, BUT at the same time theres a level of speculation regardless because its the fucking internet. people are wild, people are strangers, and there is a non zero chance that people could have lied. just because people have a level of speculation on something they read online, that doesnt mean they need therapy and it doesnt mean theyre a bad person, it means they have a brain. if YOU want to believe it without a shadow of a doubt then thats fine, and if other people have some doubt thats also fine, just dont go out of your way to fucking bother people because thats just unnecessary.

second off, i need proof for accusations like “so and so is posting feral” or “so and so is an abuser,” saying things like “the way that kinah bounced back into cs makes me speculate” isnt an accusation.

the views of the anons i post here arent reflective of my own views, and if something is a problem i give my own input on it in my response. when i created this blog i didnt want to delete asks because i feel like that controls a narrative and makes me an unreliable narrator when it comes to these discussions. if people want to talk about things like this, i didnt want to force silence because thats not how you hold a discussion.

as an additional note: anons have been becoming increasingly aggressive in my inbox, whether its towards one another or towards myself. i implore all of you to stop being so aggressive, stop making assumptions, and stop playing this holier than thou card. so much of the art and cs community is made up of people who will virtue signal and place themselves on a moral pedestal and my inbox is the last place for that. if you want to rant and complain, go ahead, but stop acting like youre better than each other because you have the Correct Opinion on everything and believe everything you read on the internet.

my final thoughts on this are as follows: there is a non zero chance that everyone is lying. is it a small chance? sure. does this mean we should spread the narrative that it was all fake? no. are you a horrible person who should die in a fire because you dont 100 percent believe that the attempts were real? no, but also dont go out of your way to be an asshole because of that belief. i think we should all publicly operate under the assumption that the attempts were real. if you want to privately speculate, go fucking wild. could kinah going back into cs and making stuff for terras possibly be bad for their mental health? maybe. but also, its none of our business. and thats what im ending this topic with, a lot of this shit really is just none of our business and i think you all give way too much of a fuck about someone who you will never know irl.

i dont dislike kinah, in fact i actually really liked them when they were on staff for terras. but at some point we all gotta throw our arms up and say why is this taking up so much of my brain power when this person is just someone i follow on fucking toyhouse.

we are done with asks about kinahs attempt now, unless anyone has important info or something new to say im deleting them.

#closed species vent #terralien #closed species #terraliens #vent #mod rambles #kinah #yall are insufferable sometimes

[idealspawn]

tbh now that i think of it i kind of needed him not for himself but for myself too. so that is fucked up a bit maybe from my side too. like that i needed someone secure enough to kind of mm trust them and be truly honest and transparent and loving and giving but not because i so very much loved them and wanted to give TO THEM but to see if i can trust myself to let myself be giving. if that makes sense. to let myself try be securely attached. but not necessarily because im madly in love. but like train my vulnerability. he said he read my poem and it was nice, cheesy at times but with good parallels and metaphores. i explained one part to him more in detail too bc it was pretty open to interpretation. he said he will write it down but i dont think he will. but it also feels so cringe because he was meant to read it when he still had feelings for me. also a good um.. stepping stone for me i guess. to admit i have feelings for someone still when they dont, although im acc not too sure myself how much i was truly madly attached either. feels good to swallow my pride though. i also tend to lose feelings when ppl arent attracted to me which is good. i dont have a problem w chasing him. im attracted to ppl being attracted to me which in a way, from me, is also a bit fucked up. he also didnt become a part of my real immediate daily routine as i didnt really text w him too much. we just were together irl a lot and really present in those times. and i also made sure i didnt abandon my friends this time so i still massively have my support system w me. but it sucks a bit bc i literally talked abt him to so many of my friends but its okay like i dont owe anyone anything to last just bc i talked abt it. and shit changes. just bc i said sth true in one moment doesnt mean i has to stay true forever or that now that it isnt true anymore that it couldnt have been immensely true at one point. one thing that was pretty fucked up tho is that he told me he wanted to have sex w me just bc he was looking for certainty and answers abt his feelings from there not bc he acc felt connected to me. like i usually.. want to be intimate when i feel love not disconnect..... and now he said he didnt find it from there. but like.. we were literally both so high and it was such a bad situation. no wonder you cant feel a spark bc i was literally numb like a vegetable. he said he knows it was a bad decision but like why do you take this situation to tell you clues abt what next then. and like. the same way with all our previous hangouts when i felt sth off. like the reason it was off was bc he was off and not fully honest abt it. it felt like such a relief when he said all the words out so rawly at last and i felt i could come out of this weird anxious shell of a performance i had on w him the past few times bc of the way i felt sth was weird but i couldnt tell what it was so i couldnt fully be normal myself either. so like the last times he gave me "chances" couldnt have been proper chances to show him anything true bc it didnt feel like... normal. there was an elephant in the room that was standing right between us. but he refused to address it when i tried to. i guess i got my answer that its not that im weird that i keep getting into these awk situations but that the other person feels weird and that is the thing affecting me. im fucking normal. i cried a bit too like its not that i am not affected by it at all but i think im kind of fine. i anyway didnt see him for 2 weeks now. its just weird bc we had plans which made us be together daily for like 2 weeks straight and um. i dont know if i can do that. even if we are friends bc i dont usually do that w my friends really. its weird. but like. fuck idk.

[isabelguerra]

sexuality hcs for the main cast? :D

NO idea what brought this on but yeah sure! unless stated otherwise my work usually writes everyone bi by default, even if they haven’t realized it yet, but it can be really fun to play with different interpretations too. honestly its not something i think about often or keep too rigid, sometimes it depends on what kind of story im writing and what messages i want to convey. but sometimes we stay silly

- isabel max johnny violet are bi

- isaac dimitri stephen are gay

- ollie tends to flip between ‘future bear’ and ‘token straight friend’ it usually depends which is funnier in context

- lisa and suzy being lesbians has always been a constant in my brain

- if im feeling REALLY indulgent ill spice max up with some lesbianism. hit him with the dyke beam

- ed usually isnt cis to me so whatever goes on there tends to switch up a lot. i dont try to name it i just focus on feeling it. when ed IS cis i think him being the token straight friend is pretty funny. like hes the really enthusiastic type but means well.

- RJ is similar to ed. sometimes i like them as a lesbian. sometimes i like them not interested in anyone. sometimes i like shipping them w ed. sometimes other ppl. theyre a really fun character to write actually

- jeff is gay but he doesn’t realize for a long long time. where everyone else is a bit more comfortable with themselves hes still got a lot of low self esteem and internalized stuff going on, not in a constantly sad way but like he’ll be the type to think ‘man i wish *I* could marry my best friend! too bad im straight haha’ or like when theyre teens he kisses cody and has a crisis over liking it before thinking ‘wait! what am i worrying about! codys gay, yeah, so maybe it meant something to him, but im not gay so that means i dont have anything to worry about. i should focus on supporting my good friend. its totally cool if he kisses me because im straight so its like a pass!’ he is wrong and he is gay

- whenever i write izjo its always bi. if anything their bisexuality makes a bigger spectacle out of how they like an opposing gender rather than liking their own which i always get a huge kick out of bc its as if i got so accustomed to being around gay people irl and online that sga became the norm and i had to remind myself that mf couples exist and its an option and its okay. there are a couple works ive never posted where this is actually like THE central theme

- i joke bc i like making fun of izjo but from testimonies/talks/essays ive heard/watched/read this is actually a very common experience among bi ppl

- like when ur young and just learning how to exist and be confident as an lgbt person and taking such wild pride and comfort in your sga that u forget your oga. maybe even feel a little weird about it. confusion and nervousness. dare i say shame.

- im flipping the script…… of COURSE youre gay what are you TALKING about… what youre going to feel confused repressed nervous and weirdly guilty over is liking a BOY. or like yes son we know you like boys we live in mayview. but youve never liked a girl before and you dont know how to and it terrifies you. and then sometimes it has absolutely no significance at all and it’s just normal. again it depends on the themes and what i want to get out of my brain. that post thats like ‘no gay pairing written by a straight person will ever be as unhinged as a straight pairing written by a gay person’ etc. is it bc i want to write a casual+ comfortable gay existence bc ive seen so many bad u happy ones? is it bc i enjoy exploring societal dynamics by reframing them in the perceived norm? is it yuri? is it yuri.

- i just reread the phrase ‘youve never liked a girl before and you dont know how to and it terrifies you’ and im thinking i made it yuri. is johnny my puppet. have i been using johnny as a puppet this whole time to work out my feelings towards liking women. izjo is bi because i write johnny like a gay girl who just happens to just be a boy.

- i got distracted anyway spender is meterosexual

#paranatural #this is probably so not what you wanted im sorry #asks #anon #anyway im going to sleep. night ✌️

[asscrackcreed]

part 2 after the author replied i wasnt sure if i should carry on but with their unapologetic attitude ofc i went through with it

STOP WITH THE KADAR AND MASTURBATING THING ITS FUCKING GROSS WHY DOES HIS BROTHER A N D MOTHER KNOW !!!!!!!’ ENOUGH

omg kadar is 16 and maliks 19 shut the fuck up EWWWWW

ok let me explain it properly this author fetishised kadars teenage hormones why do we keep coming back to kadar wanting to have sex esp if hes a minor its disgusting theyve made a point that u can explore gross things in fiction because yk its fiction and not irl and tbh idgaf because youre telling me you enjoy reading about a minors sexual life? youre telling me you enjoy reading about a brother telling his MINOR brother about HIS sex life? defend incest if u want im not here to change ur mind about incest but if u think that u can just write about minors sexually u are fucking disgusting

a lot of talk about god but none of it relates to the story or being gay so idk not interested

DES AND EZIO KISSED. WITH TONGUE. AND EZIO INSTIGATED IT?

chapter 27^ i cant do it anymore its 3am as im typing i’ll finish the rest when i wake up

kadars only personality trait is being horny tf

adha is very religiously strict and thinks altaïr is a godless pig uhm. ok… making adha rude is very uncalled for you couldve chose to use a random woman like…. a stranger but no it had to be canon altaïrs dead ex… and altaïr says ‘i dont know much about islam’ i dont understand why some fanfic authors insist on making altaïr completely atheist, i feel like altaïr wouldn’t be religious tbfh but hed still have islamic norms and values. when we can write characters in a way the original source material doesnt why cant we include cultural and religious aspects? why do ppl try so hard to remove the fundamental aspects of islamic culture. altaïr not knowing islam just drags the story more because if he did then hed understand adha and like idk hed connect with malik more and adhas anger would be justified but here she is being an ass and assuming the worst because…? she could’ve just called him an asshole idk why she dragged religion into this its reminding me of strict religious ppl who hate the new generation so far there hasn’t really been much about the good things of islam

adhas apologising now for assuming the worst. she paints smth for him? doesnt really make sense but alright

if altaïr can honor his mum with a tattoo (which is haram but anyways) he could surely honor his dad by celebrating eid or smth or just praying some time idk the paragraph im reading is about how his grandmas not religious and his dad was a practising muslim but never taught altaïr which ok he died when altaïr was 5 fine but idk the authors very intent on making sure altaïr isnt muslim but personally if he was muslim it’d be interesting because then hed struggle with his faith and himself i mean malik doesnt seem to struggle at all so idk ig everyones different

excuse me? so we can add black fetishisation to the list as well cuz wtf was that? it doesnt even add to the story its so random and unnecessary?

uhm altaïr and adha fell in love not a lot of depth to their relationship considering this mustve been over the course of days maybe even a few weeks idk just not a lot of time as it is to uh fall in love but shes engaged so theyve left it at that still not a bad plot point ig but it doesnt affect malik as of yet which undermines this plot point but lets see what happens

leo and sofias interactions are cute i like this leo malik and sofia friendship going on

im not gonna comment on any more incest its obvious this author just has a thing for it and theres so many fics that have incest and if i was to really fight that id do it for the other fics too also i wont comment on their writing as a whole anymore the main issue here is the cultural erasure and fetishisation

these do not affect the plot in any way shape or form, yes its an old 2014 fanfic but the author seems to not give a fuck that theyve written gross things. as well as poorly write islamic characters, it feels like a ‘youre either religious or your not’ and writing things like this is harmful! youre telling readers that muslims are either very harsh (like adha was) or very sweet (like maliks mum for being okay that maliks gay) but what about the catholic side of the family? theres no indication that they’re homophobia stems from religion. also ppl think its okay to just make altaïr unaware of his own heritage and faith? yes hes not muslim per say but hes syrian? his father died young but you can choose to write about the family wanting to help altaïr keep his customs alive. its white. its so white. it makes me more upset that the author will only focus on us disliking incest rather than accept that they’re wrong for cultural erasure. youve told hs that he’s syrian and white but just added that he misses his dad. and u cant defend sexualising kadar at all i wont hear anything about that because what u enjoy in fiction is also a reflection of what you enjoy irl. if you think incest is cool you will have a natural interest of it irl theres a reflection of your interests in your writing. if for example i wrote angst you would naturally expect that i like it or have a connection to it in some way, that i enjoy somehow. but i dont really like angst i could write for it but thats from my experience and thought process. someone who writes smut doesnt mean that they’re sexually active but theyve thought about it, they might’ve done some research to it. do u see what im tryna say? you are actively advancing on your interests when you right about them in fiction, you have a connection to it. if you hated smut someone would assume you hated it irl. the logic applies here too, if you dont like incest irl and it grosses you would simply not read incest in fiction because it grosses you out. if you dont like cultural erasure and sexualising minors irl then why tf would u add it to ur fic? why would u think that the boundary fiction would allow that to be okay? and the thing is micro-aggressions back in 2014 were bad and i know that but the author having had feedback and not even acknowledging it in this day and age is disgusting. ppl say they like sass verse, i have to say the plot of it is interesting but there were so many unnecessary aspects that did not contribute or feel nice to read at all. even if someone uses the excuse that they didnt know smth about islam, i as brown muslim you can not dismiss my feelings towards the way they wrote any muslim characters.

#im so tired i cant believe i have to defend my own faith like this #assassin's creed #ac #text #fic review

[slowjamastan]

tumblr for me has always been about stress relief, a fan outlet, and a means of collecting nice pictures. but when ppl post abt their real life i feel jealous! id like to be comfortable linking my online self to my real self. id like to not be so self conscious that i miss opportunities to find happiness and connection.

if i opened up more on here (posting face pics, talking abt real life non-vaguely, etc) maybe people would open up in return and we could be friends but if i start opening up then im publicly on the internet and findable/stalkable. with controversial opinions attached and also basically diary entries. i dont want to Exist online but i do want to exist online. i dont want to be seen but i do want to Be Seen. or something like that.

i do like having no one anonymously in my business especially tech corporations and ad companies. but god thats not really avoidable no matter what huh. google knows my location as long as i have a phone or whatever. the only middle ground is "no social media" which is just "the big corporations can know where i am and what im doing but not my friends and family"

like whats my goal here? not existing online for the sake of being unknowable? and yet im here now wishing i was more known? so isnt this just all making me lose touch with people more than necessary? i cant think of any upsides that dont boil down to "sense of superiority" — the main exception being sn*pchat i hate that app so much lmao

i guess another reason is that giving myself a Public Image is exhausting. if im a contactable shiny microinfluencer on instagram i would ignore SOOOOOO many messages. i hate replying to messages. if anyone tried to be like omg ur on insta now long time no talk :) id ignore them ......... theres no point in putting myself out there bc its the opposite of what i want.

i guess in the end id rather be known 5% by a group of tumblr strangers than 10% or more by irls. i dont know if this is just comfort in habit or what. i do know that this gets easier when you dont have a tumblr at all. i didnt feel the drive to post my feelings when i didnt have a place to put them. i was happier for it. idk

i dont want my friends and family to know anything about me tbh. i always want to cut everyone off and ruin my own life, and i dont know how to work around that. i can make friends but i cant keep a healthy friendship and love my family but i dont want to talk to them about anything important or really at all! and i end up very alone at the worst times. again i do not know how to work around this!

#post #man idk i didnt want to delete all this tho

[batarangsoundsdumb]

hae interrogationes multae respondeant quia demens .

if you read this entire ask post you deserve a gold star and financial recompensation

Um, Obviously because when you’re adopted by a white guy you automatically become white duhhh

this is about this post lmao and yeah youre absolutely right, you have to hand your poc card in when you get adopted by a white guy.

Do you think Cass would listen to Yanni, the YouTube channel epic symphonic rock, or some other stuff? There's some cool mashups but idk if that's up your alley, I kinda feel like I'm pushing it with my weird taste of music by recommending an orchestra cover of metal, but i just love that sort of thing and mashups :P @harvestyourcherries 

i haven’t heard of that? but in my personal (correct) opinion steph listens to classical music, and then both modern and older, and then also stuff like black sabbath, iron maiden, but also hardrock and hardcore. i like the idea of cass just liking the most extreme screaming songs full of noise and then also listen to pachelbel’s 370th sonata yanno? THANK YOU for the rec tho

speaking of ur cass playlist hc...reminds of the time (yesterday) i found 2 playlists randomly on spotify from the same user. one was abt 3 hours of instrumental/classical "dark" & "nostalgic" music. the other almost 11 hours of nothing but hardcore bass/synth/electronic music. just an incredible tightrope act to put on in public. the synth one was also called like "psalms for synth sluts" which is Also incredible

tbh i LOVE synth SO MUCH like for no reason at all but then also cannot handle a poppy electronic beat lmao. but this seems like the kinda thing i’d do but just in one (1) playlist bc i just sort songs by vibe instead of genre? that’s how i end up with britney spears and billy ray cyrus in the same playlist. 

Oh, I want Kate Kane playlist next! It would be amazing if you could do one when you have time and will 🙏

how rude would it be of me to just say no? like sorry kate but idk you and also you seem way too keen on the us military for an institution that homophobically targeted you? (and also commits war crimes) but let’s unpack the fact that the institution that caused the death of your mom and sister and also got you blacklisted for being gay is still one you align with???

'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' --- when i tell you i fucking screamed LOL!!!!!!! i can imagine the cameraman not knowing if he should cut to commercial or keep it on these two weirdos fighting on stage (bruce definitely ruffled dick's hair/noogied him right?? 

about this post but yeah lmao. this cameraman just turns to like the audience to get a reaction and it’s just multiple moments of CLEAR shock.

you are the only funny person on this hellsite

how egotistical is it for me to say that i get this ask multiple times a month? bc it literally happens so often it’s hilarious to me.

Wish there was more john/Bruce content 😔😔😔 was so hungry I actually looked at canon media 😔😔😔 (Justice League Dark babeeeyyyyyy)

check out batman: damned for some mediocre content but at least it’s john/bruce (also very interesting story and stuff, just got very >:( over this weird part where harley quinn tried to r*pe bruce or something? it’s not for everyone)

dick grayson but he's nicki minaj

his anaconda don’t want none,,, unless...... 

Dick Grayson was never a cop, he played Marshall on Paw Patrol

you are SO right. also paw patrol is a fucking good show idc. that shit could’ve been the new steven universe on this hellsite.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CS1lI0bLI7-/?utm_medium=copy_link

...

why do people keep reposting my CONTENT. if you are not funny yourself don’t just grab shit off of tumblr and post it on insta,,, get a life. sidenote: should i start an insta and get all these ppl to take my content down that would be funny as hell.

Might I suggest for a Gotham City Meme: something about the true crime fandom thirsting for the rogues gallery

ok can i just say something slightly controversial?? no? i don’t find true crime ppl who are into criminals funny, that shits disturbing irl im not gonna bring that into my very chill universe.

i may have never seen a 'jason cleaning guns in sink' fic but i do know he WOULD

THANK YOU

bestie im sorry to say this to you but while you can, and people do wash their guns in the sink, that is a lot of lead in a very vital part of the kitchen.

people tend to do it in the bathtub.

WHY???? like damn why do you even have guns

i dont think i read many gun sink fics exactly but i have read lots of fics where jason cleanes his guns in the living room. usualy dissembles them and cleans them with a rag i think

lmao fair enough, like i think that’s a large part of what i remember as well.

if you say you've seen/read gun sink fics I believe you. I think those of us who didn't see them are lucky or maybe didn't search for fics by tags or something idk

i mean ive never sought them out but i HAVE seen them,, like definitely i know almost for certain.

saw your tags and I'm interested in Steph/Kara now. They would be the most chaotic couple <3

literally thoooo, i have a wip where they get together in a zombie apocalypse and like UGGGHhhh i am so in love with them.

I am the Breece anon. Thanks for the recommendation; am reading now. I’ve always been a hardcore Superman fan because I love my pure himbo farm boy. My logic is, if one Bruce is a Broose, then multiple Broose are a herd of Breece. And this is a hill upon which I will perish.

fair enough,,,, like moose, meese, goose, geese, bruce, breece. i get your logic and i stand by it as well. (glad you enjoyed the comic recs!!!!)

It's a beautiful day in Gotham, and you are a group of horrible Breece

OH my god dude lmao

there only being 42 fics on ao3 for tim and bernard is honestly so sad i need more

it’s like twice that now!!! we did it lads. (tho very sad that my fic isnt number one but like number 4 :((((  )

i'm too late you already did the poll lol but may i suggest bethy (bernard + timothy)

shit dude that wouldve been so fucking funnyyyyy. think ppl have just stuck to timber tho, tim/bernard kinda died down recently and i think it’s too bad, they’re a great couple and i love them.

Wait, hear me out

Bernothy @redlightofdawn

great recommendation (lmao this ask is from like a month ago) but very sorry to announce that NARDTH is the superior shipname

Wait, we know that bernard likes milfs (Tim's step-mom) but what about dilfs? gilfs?

Wait no, I regret sending that ask

these were two seperate asks and they’re HILARIOUS. in my personal opinion tho,,, milfs, gilfs, dilfs are just about vibes and bernard is just attracted to sexy ppl who may sometimes be milfs, dilfs, or EVEN gilfs.

crime in bludhaven would drop to half if nightwing had a boob window. in this essay i will-

WHERE’S THE ESSAY ANON, WHERE’S THE FUCKING ESSAY

Wait if Barbra and Tim r at opposite ends at all times what happened to Barbra once everyone’s Tim’s ever love before started dying lol

she won a lottery ticket and spent 2 weeks on a resort in the bahamas before returning home and finding out that the joker was arrested for tax evasion and then spent a month staying at her big tiddie goth girlfriend’s house before conner came back to life and she broke her pinkie playing table hockey.

Why is the opposite end thing so funny and compelling to me. Tim comes back from his depression quest for Bruce and Babs is now a literal god

lmao when tim loses his spleen barbara reaches nirvana.

Are you still taking music recs because I have three songs that remind me of Jason that I think you'd like

send to me or lose a toe

🌸 ⭐ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity! ⭐🌸😋

thanks, i wont tho on account of i wont.

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMduBy3Sr/

⬆️

This is the whole of Blüdhaven and everyone anywhere.

Nightwings ass alone saves more people in a calendar year and does more for so society than most heroes do their whole career.Also u are one of the funniest tumblr pages out there. The vibes are unmatched and the memes and tags ✨send me✨.Thank u and goodnight @julia-flow 

fanksss also lmao.

That's going to be a little bit difficult to explain, but

There's some music that you listen to and you think, "oh my gosh, I can perfectly imagine Dick Grayson singing this song, with the same voice as the singer because that voice matches with Dick Grayson"?

oh yeah totally lmao. i have a lot of songs that i think are just entirely dick grayson yanno? kind of all of my playlists have that vibe, but i really find bleachers to fit with dick? idk.

"Lois lane/Superman" fics this, "Lois lane/Clark Kent" fics that, (/lh) let's get into the real good stuff. Some people ship Lois, Clark, and Superman as a throuple. Most popular fic tag for sure

yes totally, i think they’d be absolutely killer on ao3 and clark gets so fucking embarassed about it.

I miss your post, hope you’re doing okay!!

haha this was like 2 months ago, but i was doing fine then too! just didn’t have a lot of inspiration in terms of content.

Doot doot!

noot noot

I’m confused. What did DC do now? Like with nightwing? And another sibling? Please spoil everything for me

lmao they gave him a secret sister plotline where they had his dad cheat on his mom with tony zucco’s wife, bc dick’s life wasn’t traumatic enough yet.

sorry but it's so funny that batman is called "the dark knight" when the gotham city baseball team is called the gotham knights. it'd be like if a vigilante was running around new york called like "the scary yankee"

lmaooo no. but like yankee comes from dutch names or something so wouldnt it be HILARIOUS if gotham knights came from like german names and bruce would be running around called the dark KLAUS UND NIEK @graysonnightwing 

(not a batcest shipper) it’s so funny to me that the responses are “i’m a batcest shipper because i can differentiate fiction from reality and and it doesn’t bother me personally, but i understand why you oils think it’s weird” to “i wish all batcest shippers a very fucking die”

yeah lmaoo. i personally basically flipped my entire stance around to ‘i dont care please leave me and everybody else alone’ bc i think there’s really no point in starting a moral dillema over some fucking fandom bullshit. Please just,,, go home,,, log off, find a nice forest to have a little walk in and remember that somewhere in history, somebody probably died in the place you’re standing. and you will also die someday, and somebody will have to look at your internet usage and see you fighting multiple people anonymously while being named ‘nightwingsbuttchin200186′ like... calm down, we’re all gonna die this is not the thing to worry about.

so since like "wards" don't really exist in modern society almost all the batkids are foster kids, right? i used to work in the system and imagine: monthly visits from social workers and guardian ad litems, bruce having to get permission to take the boys anywhere out of state, calling their social worker at like 8 a.m. like "yeah dick broke his arm again... a gymnastics accident this time...." their poor social worker. bruce send her a huge bouquet and box of chocolates every month to stay on her good side

i imagine the social worker just getting into the case like ‘yeah let’s get this kid a good guardian’ and then ending up having to work with 22 y/o bruce wayne and his 50 y/o dad. and so this social worker is like ‘okay we can work with this, this is the best home i can find’ and then like it ends up landing on its feet and then the kid gets adopted and then they get a call a year later like ‘uhm so hi, this kid tried to steal my tyres can i adopt him?’ and like 3 years later. ‘okay so basically, my neighbours’ kid imprinted on me and now they’re dead, can i keep him?’ two years later it’s like ‘okay so this assassin child-’

ever since I saw that one post of yours, the meme that's something like "I know that abba's backup dancer got me" with a picture of discowing, I've been haunted. Every once in a while I'll be minding my own business then the image of abba's backup dancer dick grayson aka nightwing aka discowing will flash in my mind and I'll be frozen in place. Today at work I was in the middle of folding clothes and suddenly once again discowing entered my mind and I suddenly lost the ability to see anything except He. Thank you.

wow. the IMPACT.

Braver than any US marine man props to you🤝

this shit is about the time i wrote an article on batcest, like man,,, the fact that i didn’t get cancelled is MIRACULOUS. also like,,, uh if anybody on here did gossip on me,, send screenshots i’d love to see it.

Hello, just wanted to say your article was great. Thank you for taking the time to provide an unbaised answer. It should provide people with nuances they couldn't possibly conjure on their own.

May I ask where your username originates from?

yes you may (also thanks!!!) i thought it up when i was trying to find an original username bc i didnt want to be called like ‘timdrakes something something’ or ‘jason todd something smoething’ or ‘dick grayson something something’ yanno? so i thought batarangs, they sound so dumb and that’s my username story... now it’s my whole entire brand lmao.

yno that bit in kick ass where red mist asks kick ass if he wants a hit of his blunt, was that the inspo for stoner tim

no? it’s bc i think stoners are hilarious and drugs are great. (dont do drugs tho) 

How would u feel if someone actually wore one of those bruce or ollie pride shirts u edited

fenomenal next question.

Dick as lil huddy and Jason as James gave me radiation poisoning and now I’m screaming crying throwing up so thx for that

(Rico suave as Tim is perfect tho literally no changes needed)

i was so funny for that shit wasn’t i??? lmao i loved those weird ass fancasts

You're doing the Lord's work by providing us with all these Gotham/Metropolis citizens memes, thank you for being so relentlessly funny @nellethiel-aranel

you’re welcome!! i really enjoy making memes, but getting validation for my content and my memes is REALLY nice.

Bruce is such a slut in your memes and honestly i love that for him @rhodey-rhudert-rhodes-main 

he’s that much of a slut irl too dw.

Bruce and Alfred have an emergency pride flag for the batkids. Oliver Queen printed an emergency "I love my gay son" t-shirt and as soon as Roy told him he was dating Jason, Oliver started wearing that shirt everyday and Roy always cringes when he sees it. Oliver also has an emergency "I love my lesbian daughter" shirt just in case for Cissie.

lmao YES i had a post like this bc like all of their kids/family members are so gayy

stop bringing back batfam fancasts it is not real it is not real it is not- 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

oh yes it is my darling.

did discowing burn down the notredam because he hates the bees? @allulily

no he did it bc fuck the french.

im gonna beg for 1 thing and 1 thing only. please please please put physical by olivia newton john on dick's playlist

okay then beg. bc i wont. physical reminds me too much of glee and that hurts me mentally.

your playlist is sorely missing some Madonna. Specifically Into the Groove, Like a Prayer, and Vogue

i’m scared of madonna that’s why she’s not on there. she haunts me in my dreams.

suggestion: son of batman by aaron dews for dick’s playlist🤩

sorry, i listened to it and the vibe didn’t agree with me.

Hear me out, metropolis citizens sending rare pair fics of Clark Kent x Superman fics to Lois to edit

yes, absolutely hilarious. even more funny if they send like physical copies, no address attached and lois sends it back marked with red ink, SOMEHOW

Imagine all the smut Clark must of read editing the fics

clark reads smut confirmeeed

NOT LOIS READING SUPERBAT PORN AND EDITING IT A 2AM 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

hc that alfred is a meta that boosts healing factor of the people around him. if the bats are injured as much as they seem to be they would be doing bat stuff MAYBE half the year. no one including alfred knows about this. whenever the kids move out they inexplicably dont recover from injuries as fast and feel better whenever they visit the manor they just chalk it up to homesickness. bruce just thinks he heals really fast. alfred thinks everyone doesnt take care of themselves properly @finchcollector

that’s actually such a great idea, but i think that alfred would find out and learn how to concentrate it better so he can help more people, bc he’s great and i love him.

One of your dickfast posts reminded me of that tweet that goes: 'so you've had sex how many times? Yeah technically that's not a bromance' lol that's dickwally or dickroy

literally tho. like that’s all of dick’s friendships. once it gets past a certain time dick is like ‘wow i wonder what it would be like to make out with wally, wally come make out with me’ and wally’s like ‘we’ve done this like 40 times, dick, you know what it’s like’ and dick is like ‘sorry are you complaining?’ and they just make out.

superfam and batfam associations??

-batman and superman

-dick/barabara and supergirl?

-conner and tim

-jon and damian

pls enlighten me I am confused

nope,,, uhm batman and superman, but dick and superman as well, and then conner and tim, jon and damian and steph + babs with supergirl

I came across a fic in which Wonder Woman calls Batman "Stella" (like Stellaluna, the children's book) and I can imagine the batkids hop on the trend and maybe copies of the book appear at random places (aka, everywhere Bruce frequents)

sorry can’t reciprocate that was the name of my high school chemistry teacher and it gives me nightmares to think about.

good human what are your pronouns?

wouldn’t you like to know?

I need me some gothamites preferring harley over joker memes

everyone prefers harley over joker youre just very fucked up if you dont

don't understand why people try to add like veteran policy to the batfamily

dick pulling out his veteran batfam member card so he can eat first: step aside, peasants

Do you know the song Simmer by Haley Williams? It (the first verse anyways) reminds me of Jason? It's about rage.

damn yeah i LOVE HAYLEY!!!! youre right thoo

Okay so I like listen to your stoner Tim Drake playlist 24/7 but would he listen to skegss? Also I keep adding songs mentally it’s killing me 😩✋🏼 Anyways,, I literally love and worship your playlist 😃🤞🏼 And uh yeah have a good day ✨

stoner tim drake playlist is lyfeeee. also dont know who skeggs is? i’m stupid? have a good day!!

All the Robins (and Batgirl) decide to trade costumes for one night just to fuck with Batman and all the villains in Gotham. @subspacecadet 

batman knows it’s them youknow but like,,, what does he call them? he’s like ‘red hood?’ and 3 people answer and he’s not about to compromise some identities so he’s just Pissed.

I aspire to treat cops the way my dad treats them. This man is a 45 year old Asian immigrant to the US and the treats them like his pets. He talks about them like unruly children. Sometimes he pays off local cops to shut up and stop acting racist. And usually it works. I don’t know why but I can see Oliver Queen doing this

vibes... and also yes? oliver queen handing a local cop a donut to shut the fuck up lmao. but yanno i commit enough crimes to not really want to ever see a cop ever, so they kinda scare the everloving fuck out of me.

seeing as tim hasn't aged in years, that means he was 17 at peak emo tumblr era. im back on my emo tim bullshit and im not letting it go

emo tim had a wattpad account send tweet

People seem to think that batman is so dark and serious when the rainbow batsuit is right there. He wore it with no shame.

dude the 60s were a DIFFERENT TIME

dick grew up in a circus, jason grew up on the streets, and tim was probably raised by the internet

all of them cuss every other word and you cannot tell me otherwise

bitch i KNOW but dc has to change to an 18+ rating if they want to sell comix with swear words in them so we gotta deal with imagining the swear words in ourselves

thoughts on teen titans and young justice

haven’t seen teen titans on account of havent seen it and young justice was LITERALLY my favourite thing ever, tho i do gotta admit it’s not at all similar to the young justice comics unfortunately. i really wouldve liked to see timmy bart kon cassie and cissie animated on tv!!

ew ew ew how to delete batcest shippers I genuinely digust them

log off tumblr?

Okay as poc who was called racist for calling an Italian pastabrain: in the batfam are Italians bit Damian just yells various insults about the others being Italian. Just him yelling “What are you doing you moronic spaghettihead!” At steph etc

huh? i meant real italians. homeboy is telling steph he hopes she chokes on her fucking garlic.

I think it's dumb as hell to pull the batman is the best fighter in the batfam argument because like it's just irresponsible of Bruce to let his kids fight when they couldn't possibly be on his league or something

fair enough, but also like who cares they could all kill you just sit down and take a beating.

lady shiva, thalia al ghul and Selina Kyle are all milfs @notanothertimburtonenthusiastugh 

unfortunately, i have to admit,,, you’re right

why tf didn't someone give joker a death sentence already? like he's a mass murderer...give him the electric chair treatment wtf

idk i think plenty of people would have tried to murder him already (boring answer is: he is a popular character so they can’t kill him off bc he brings in lots of money)

There’s no such thing as “ copaganda”.

all american media is propaganda. happy to clear this up for you

is it bad that I find lady shiva owa owa

no. find her as owa owa as you want.

aight I'm guessing the order of your favs in batfam:

1. tim

2. Steph

3. dick

4. Duke

5. the rest

you’re wrong but it’s cute that you tried, i generally don’t have favourites, but i have a special place in my heart for steph, tim, dick and cass. bc they were like my introduction to batfam. but damian, jason, duke, bruce, babs and alfred are NOT FORGOTTEN OR UNLOVED

oh my god i was literally just readily willing to believe that italians werent white ty for clarifying it was a joke im so dumb sdkvjskdfs

i mean some italians aren’t white? italian is a nationality as well as an ethnicity, so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

since I saw so many people doing headcanons about the nationalities of batboys, I see Dick as an Italian.

dont know if youre serious or not, but sure.

super random but

jason 🤝 damian

old english

lmao fair enough.

tim absolutely has 1 gay uncle and his parents shit talk said uncle all the time so after bruce adopts him he specifically reaches out to this uncle to be like "heyyyy just so you know you majorly influenced my life yes i know i havent seen you since i was 5 and at the family reunion yes i know you dont remember my name idc thank you im gay too" and then they never talk again.

yuppp lmao that’s definitely something that could happen. i can also consider tim having no family members, like none. until he does like a dna test and he realises he has like an aunt living barely 2 miles away from him who’s like some illegitimate child of his grandpa.

I dare you one of them sends clark superman/clark fic and clark corrects the shit out of it and then goes like ps his dick is not that big, just telling as someone who has seen it. internet either explodes or goes who tf did he not fuck at this point.

i think everybody would call clark a buzzkill and try to cancel him over that.

so you're telling me Tim Drake wouldn't buy Starbucks?

no. dunkin donuts all the way

One of my favorite things is imagining people finding out jason came back from the dead and being like "oh no does he have magic powers now?!?!?" and he just pulls out a gun and tries to shoot joker

now he doesn’t even have the gun :) lmao

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

bruce gets codename ‘ugh’ everytime. he hates it.

crazy that tim being a 17 y/o ceo and a stoner who does brand deals are all actual canon things written in detective comics comics and not made up for shits and giggles by you, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb @rowdeyclown

SO CRAZY HUH?

batman au where everything is the same but his utility belt is bright pink

absolutely, but i raise you, his boots light up like sketchers when he kicks people.

unbeknownst to the superhero fandom writers in the dcuniverse, clark and BRUCE are one of the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag on ao3. clark writes the best lois x superman angst, full of unhappy endings and scenes that are a so detailed you'd think you were in the middle of a superhero beatdown. bruce made an ao3 account to fuel "the do the butts match" thing, and makes batman/bruce fics from time to time. he wrote a superbat fic as a joke but ended up making it REAL porny. @concrastinator

dude they’re WAY too busy for that. Oliver Queen and Hal Jordan on the other hand are the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag writing what is Mostly porn.

When the dining table topic gets to politics, Steph says "eat the rich" as the solution

bruce just silently takes away her fork and knife while she’s talking.

#literally if you got through this i just respect you #this is mainly just for the people who sent me an ask in the past few mask #i hope your ask is in here :) #sorry for everybody else #ask #bataranswers #this took me 4 hours to do so i hope youre happy #also sidenote #does anybody know the latin translation for 'to become' #bc i just used future of 'esse' but it could be a different verb #who cares tho latin is a dead language #big congratulations to everyone who translates my sentence #here's a bonus sentence: tuam matrem futueram

[ot3]

if you dont want to discuss this then feel free to delete this, but i thought id add my 2 cents as another trans man:

you say that women who hate men dont engage with them, and while thats largely true, it still happens, probably more often online than irl. like idk it sucks that whenever i see any positivity posts for men (trans or not) theres always some hateful comments on completely harmless posts. what im trying to say isnt that were opressed more, since these are just examples of some situations online, im just saying that while for you its logical that since you hate men you want to avoid them, there are people out there who take their frustration/anger in ways that do affect men, including trans men.

also, im not gonna try to defend people i know nothing about, but i feel like while some people unfollowed you because they didnt agree with you, others could be men who just dont like to read ppl about hating them, with no hard feelings. its your blog so its your right to post about how you feel, but also people have no obligation to keep following you when they know they could feel hurt by your posts, you know? and i know this sounds like a bunch of "what if"s but im mostly just describing my own experiences, so its not completely made up. thanks for reading

oh for sure, people are absolutely free to unfollow me if anything i post makes them uncomfortable for whatever reason. i'm not mad about that.

definitely i think it is unquestioningly and inexcusably rude whenever Any positivity posts get derailed by nasty comments but, once again, as you pointed out, this really is mostly an issue of Online Spaces and tends to happen much less in person. it definitely sucks that people are derailing posts men make for/about each other, especially trans men.

i'm really not trying to defend any shitty intentionally cruel behavior here, it's just VERY deeply frustrating as a woman to see posts that rhetorically position 'women complaining about how much they dislike men' as something that holds any sort of. actual power beyond maybe a few hurt feelings.

there's also cases where white women will weaponize womanhood against black men, like i'm not here to claim women are Incapable of causing harm to men, but it really is. it really is so often the case that 9/10 time posts about how 'hating men isnt cool actually' what op means is 'a mean lesbian on the internet said something on their own blog that hurt my feelings and i need it to frame it as a Big Problem in order to feel rational for having my feelings hurt'

[seoafin]

tbh,, i havent read the raws of the interview yet, only the translated ver from fan-translator and b4 i start, i think that this will be just me talking in circle and in no particular order AND a real mess (my brain does weird things after exams) but uhh here we go

gojou collects talented people, and by doing so he finds the people he can most probably relate to, except that he can't, not really, because something in the universe shifted when he was born. and it makes me think of how he's always known it, that he is special, and he's proven it, time and time again— he wants to take in talented ppl and he does, but there rly isn't much he can do for them. for they are talented, more talented than the world can understand,,

but they aren't gojou satoru

gojou took in megumi, bc he knew megumi was strong, and would grow up to be someone even stronger, but gojou can't facilitate or encourage his growth, bc for all they're similar, they are so fundamentally different. ALSO,, while geto was in his life, gojou rly judged everything according to his understanding of geto’s moral compass. gojou wears a human suit and geto is how he learnt to wear it well 🏃

the dragonfly analogy regarding to geto’s response to gojo, who was shown wearing a dragonfly patterned yukata in HI arc,, i’m trying to not think abt the fact that dragonfly symbolized victory in jpn....pain. i quoted from a web here for more explanation : In Japan the dragonfly is known as the "victory insect", or kachimushi, because of its hunting prowess and also because it is known to never retreat. Dragonflies are agile and fast fliers and can even hover, but never fly backwards

and bringing this up again, matricide and patricide are 2 of the 5 worst act to commit in buddhism, and it was said that if u commit one of those act u’re going to spend a real long time in the deepest pit of hell before continuing the samsaric cycle (higher chances to be born as an animal after that probs)— this might be geto’s divine retribution. held no power over his own body and could be considered that he’s the same as those “monkeys” 💀

ALSO the fact that sukuna's interest is "eating" rly drives home his hedonistic philosophy of seeking pleasure for himself. and he’s a cannibal...makes me think if he’ll just chomp on ppl with the mouth on his stomach

randomly, to date i think he hasn't really called himself a human, shaman, or a curse, and has held himself apart from all 3, and we've also the intro of the cursed wombs so i wonder if he’s trying to become, or is, a different entity altogether

so onmyoji got mentioned in the interview and what they practice is called onmyodo and abe no seimei and kano no yasunori were the notable practitioners,, and the kamo in jjk is the same as irl who served the imperial court back then

maybe i was right when i said that the relation between the govt. and jujutsu elders are similar to how the shogunate and imperial court work (ie, the former holds the actual power) but... lets see later,,

and i cant believe that i actually nailed it on the analogy of jujutsu practices by religion,,, so mahayana buddhism, shintoism, and taoism is present in jjk along with their respective jujutsu practices...but between the 3, it shld (?) be taoism > shintoism > mahayana buddhism (which could took a path to pure land buddhism)

it’s weird that the number of curses are supposedly higher in jpn comparable to other countries when taoism was brought from china....tengen sus

so the zenin family tree is sth like :

brothers: [toji's dad] ; naobito ; ougi

so toji, naoya, and maki & mai are cousins of the same generation

[toji's dad] → jinichi (probs) ; toji → megumi

naobito → other brothers, naoya

ougi → maki, mai

but yea i’d call anyone who’s within/close or below my age range as cousins and others above 30 as uncles/ aunts LMFAO,, i dont rly memorize my own family tree 😭😭 especially since most call the other by honorifics instead of names : aunt, uncles etc or attaching said honorifics at the end of a name for an older sibling figure/ older cousins [but like ppl in my country also call the other who are older with sibling honorific even if we’re strangers,,, rly similar to korea’s hyung/oppa—eonnie(unnie)/noona but some uses more genderless honorific] (1)

tw // topic of incest, mentions of abuse

if anyone got the wrong idea when reading this : i am not glorifying/ romanticising incest(uous themes),, i’m looking at this with absolutely no lenses of bias even tho im rly against it

初恋 = literally : first love, or puppy love

恋 = romantic love/ deep longing

i literally don't know how else to put this...🧍and with language barrier...using a western interpretation of the eng word "love" to explain a jpnese term is not quite that simple, unfortunately

that thread omg,, i rly do understand how exactly someone could associated kindness with love bc of my upbringing, it was when i was slightly older that i was just...oh so its not like that orz,,, so the most plausible explanation would be that

but the problem is that,, akutami never specify when exactly she had a crush on them,, and when megumi answered todo’s question she had a “♡” reaction 😶,, uhmmm there’s rly no way to look past this if its this way or be in denial

i’ve seen some of "why wouldn't mai react that way after hearing megumi say he'd like someone who's compassionate when she's surrounded by men like naoya",, well I MEAN,,, that, but also mai probs admires that megumi grew up so well out of the clan, regardless of the fact that he had the foundation (10 shadows) to do so. imo she seems happy for him the way she can't be for maki, bc maki ultimately had to leave her behind

hate to say it but yea,, the 3 clans most likely still practice inbreeding in order to preserve their power and presumably their wealth too 😀

i had an idle thought abt it at first but i filed it deep in the back of my mind asap,, bc i ont wanna jump to conclusion abt this out of all things too early. it’s probably not even in jjk, but all those elite clans in other ani/mangas that produce powerful heirs and whatnot also do the same,,, but this way of (my personal) thinking was influenced when i first got into tsukihime (type-moon),,, i read abt the nanaya family background and found out that they practice that in order to keep their bloodline “pure” (to keep it short : they have an optical power),, and i had this kind of assumption ever since so there’s that

i’m,, convinced the zenins' inbreeding made it more difficult for them to get powerful shamans bc they got 2 jujutsu technique-less children with heavenly restrictions in the same generation: toji & maki

even more convinced that maki might be a bit stronger than toji bc toji could see curses without aid while maki can't so the pay-off must be higher,,, SJJASN IDK ,,, plus naoya sort of implies his older brothers are nothing compared to him, and idk if we should take that as his arrogance or that his older brothers rly are weak/powerless. it would make sense as to why naobito had a lot of sons, ig, as head of clan

i feel so bad that if one of the factors that can caused heavenly restriction is inbreeding,, toji and maki and mai had no say in how they wanted to be born but are scorned for it,, typical asian families projecting their traumas and ideals onto their kids but get mad when they realize that those ideals are ugly...😁😁😁

since the zenin are conservative,, i wonder if they still hold onto old jpnese dining traditions. where in ancient jpn, hierarchical relationships were made readily apparent even within families. a dining table where everybody sat down and ate as equals would be unheard of. rather, each individual is given their own table that indicates their status,,, someone who is not considered “strong” according to the zenin’s views most likely have no place at the table, and probs eat when those who are “strong” finished/ serve them when they are eating

if toji was tossed into a swarm of curses,, i dont think abuse during said time is below them,,,

the zenin clan was already great, but they further amassed power and strength by, what i assume to be, marrying and adopting powerful individuals into the clan 🤔 ,,, i imagine they're like the hiiragi but without doing what they did to shinya (ons reference)

BUT after all that, i like to think that since akutami’s a big horror fan, jjk might be an outlet to explore said topics or even darker ones, so i wouldnt be that surpised abt it. given that there’s more than enough “red flags” before this was dropped : a reference to “tale of hikaru genji” when a grown woman asked for gojou’s number in HI arc (out of all things); granny who transformed into the man’s daughter, sat on his lap and man just touched her waist; mei mei and ui ui ; and...this (incestous theme is in the novel btw)

lets not start with whatever the fuck in kubo’s head in the interview otherwise i’m writing paragraphs with every curse words possible,, those big 3 mangakas are so— UGH,, a planet w out (cis) men like him sounds real good rn 😌 if one of yall out there decide to do it,, pls hmu rly cant do this shit anymore

akutami said i like my men pretty and i like women who will step on my neck and spit in my face (I REMEMBERED TATSUKI FUJIMOTO’S INTERVIEW WHEN HE WAS ASKED ABT MAKIMA AND IT WAS SO 😭😭😭😭) but ykw,, love that for both of them <3

when i said 3 : one piece, bleach, naruto. aside from the blatant depiction/ characterize of women in those 3,, idk if some ppl arent aware yet but oda is friends with two (2) convicted pedos,, man...the major disappointment and disgust when i first find out abt it

anyways this is just my 2 cents (which i think rightfully belong to the trash can) so pls just take this w a lil to no grain of salt - 🐱

YEAH THE ♡ LMFAO I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST A “good answer ♡“ heart BUT NOW IM RE-EXAMINING?????

honestly i wouldn’t be surprised if the three clans practiced inbreeding. but ik people are going to be  😡😡😡😡😡 about it when the queen of fucking england is literally married to her (something) cousin. i’m not justifying it but like....love the double standards, just as always with the west 😍

DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THAT FUCKING PED* LIST THEY SHOULD ALL BE IN JAIL. JAILLLLL. it’s all so gross. that’s why i fucking hate when people look towards manga for positive representation because the chances of that are super slim to zero, especially since the industry is saturated with misogyny and ped******* and a lot of other gross stuff.

i think ppl forget jjk is a horror manga LOL so obviously it’s going to confront darker themes. the question is whether it’s going to be done tastefully or not......

#honestly I don't have high hopes unfortunately 😭 #but who knows I might be...pleasantly surprised #idk I don't have high hopes in manga nowadays so hmmm #anyway as always I enjoy ur thoughts <3 ❤️❤️ #hope ur doing well!!! #and getting all those genshin impact goodies #🐱 anon #long post

[lostinmcyt]

Hello gamer I am here from the Dream post because it won’t let me copy paste because mobile is ass. This ask is /pos to you!

liking a character is super different than excusing or even liking their actions. I really like techno n a lot of people would say I’m excusing doomsday and stuff lmaoo.

My best friend is in a similar boat with Dream, and while we disagree on some things we can still interact positively because liking or disliking a character doesn’t effect shit. There is a huge difference between liking dreams character and like. Saying that Tommy deserved it or that Tommy is at fault for anything inflicted and ppl need to realize that. Liking a character doesn’t equal excusing their actions, and because of the extreme polarization in this community people forget.

Sorry if this doesn’t make sense or misinterpreted your post, im kind of inept sometimes. I’m off anon so you can block if u want, I don’t want to cause any harm.

hello gamer thanks for reaching out! you dont have to worry you didn't say anything harmful <3

and yea basically i agree, you'd have to search far and wide to find a c!Dream apologist/enjoyer/whatever the fuck you want to call us who'd say Exile the way we saw it was deserved, obviously not, what the fuck, c!Dre, how about maybe you chill a little, this was not very poggers of you. as I said in a different post today, c!Tommy getting outta there is one of the best things ever imo for multiple reasons and if I could I'd yeet c!Dream off a cliff during that time my damn self (and then I'd send him straight to therapy. both of them. very very far away from each other)

which is why it's so annoying/jarring/straight up hurtful when people look at c!Dream fans and go 'ah yes they are the worst people out there they are actually dangerous in real life' - like guys please you've seen me make a shitpost and/or analysis about a fictional character you have no idea about my irl morals or my personal story or anything else about me or my other Dreblr friends, or c!Techno fan friends, or any other character fan friends because let's be honest so many characters did some fucked up stuff on this server- (not you personally, general you @ at the people saying this stuff)

it's just like. people throw around these big words and serious accusations and don't think that it actually means anything, but newsflash, they do, and I'm past the point of Not calling this out when I see it, you know? if no one taught these people better, then I can try, although often times it's a lost cause because people are not willing to listen

anyways thanks for sharing your opinion!! and sorry for the ramble in the reply lmao, I tend to do that

#lostanons #otterunderwater #discourse #abuse mention

[maid-of-the-golden-deer]

should this be public? prob not but this is the only space that people MIGHT care while i am not directly placing these heavy emotions on my friends. plausibly deniable care

anyways i want to fucking scream. i dont feel capable of succeeding at anything. my ability to interact with other humans has become so severely stunted that someone could say theyll think of me of a friend unless a time comes when they directly say otherwise and ill just naturally kind of think "well even if theyre mind changed theyll never say anything about it bc theyre too nice"

and before u say ppl dont do that do they do. they fucking do bc i do bc im too scared of conflict, even healthy conflict, so ill hobble along in a distant friendship hoping theyll pick up on my vibes and end it for me. bc i care more about my own feelings than other peoples. like factually and undeniably this is the case. i have screwed people over countless times and my only consolation is i have JUST enough of a conscience to feel bad about it, but not enough to stop doing it

i tanked this semester at a school bc i moved out too early when i couldnt emotionally or financially afford it even tho my family was willing to put me up for several more years bc i projected my own self hatred onto them and assumed they want me gone. i have probably severely ruined my schooling maybe permanently but my fam dont know that and im too afraid to even look at my email let alone explain myself to my professors, who already gave me AMPLE, and i mean AMPLE time and help that i blew off time and time again. i have burned every bridge ppl wre practically tripping over themselves to build with me

like im not even fundamentally unlikable!!! people DO like me!! i can start friendships easily. i can talk to people and say the right things and weasel my way out of nearly all my problems until lately with a well acted and practiced excuse. im extremely adept at navigating surface level social interactions. but when i attempt ANYTHING deeper i fall apart. i fail to message back bc i assume that ill be bothering them, bc our friendship likely was intially build on a level of lies. bc for most people (and this is mostly about irl ppl) i am absolutely lying to them. not normal lies. like lie i could get caught in of they fucking looked over my shoulder scrolling social media by accident one day. easily disproven shit i didnt need fo lie about, but i feel the need to make myself more likable on that surface level even that makes it harder and harder to my true self to be liked

and in many ways i am fundamentally mean and cruel. i think that im a failure bc my art on social media doesnt do numbers and ya know what i think that about about ppl too. when i say a bad thing about myself that could apply to others? i do mean it about them too. fuck. i absolutely do. bc im selfish so if im a failure i can take solace in the fact that others are as well. i dont always want to get better, i just want others to suffer alongside me. im also not untalented i know that. fuck in a total contradiction to my self loathing i fully believe i am a better writer than most people who do better than me. just too all over the place and impatient to succeed. im a rlly good writer. because of course those who talk down on themselves the most in some way see themselves as superior and when its not acknowledged they swing hard the other way.

i make myself so hard to fucking like but people do it anyway. they forgive me when i am totally unwilling to forgive them. they can be angry at me... but then move on. ive never let go of that anger. if i thought you were mad at me once, i will permanently be a little more distant. i will assume you still hate me for it, bc i still hate me for it. and if u piss me off, i have never forgotten and wont forget. nor will i forgive, ill mostly just not have the emotional capacity to care about it until its brought up. but when it is brought up, those bad feelings will return in force

and people will maybe read this and still like me and ill think its a fucking stupid choice for them to make! if ur my friend know im fully confused as to why. i never compliment other ppls work with more than an "ooooh neat" and then proceed to post my own, desperate to be praised. i only message first if i have something i want to say about me. its an active struggle to qsk about other people and their lives and interests. and i only do bc i know ill be hated if i dont at least make a passing effort. its all fake. i rllt barely care about anyone outside of myself. even if i do like you and do care, its in a selfish way. i take and take and take and give fucking nothing.

im mean and im selfish and im cowardly qnd im going to fucking regret in this in the morning. its a fucking good thing i dont celebrate christmas outside gifts with my fam or else id be killing the vibe lol

#long post #venting tw #idk basically if u dont want to read about someone tear themselves apart and say mean shit about their loved oned #dont read this #this isnt like. targeted at anyone either im just generally terrible to the ppl in my life

[moderngirlmp3]

hey i mean you want to talk about how long it took for me to answer this? because the answer is. too long. for absolutely no reason i'm so sorry

!!!! you should that would be so iconic of you tbh. if you do decide to Embark on an Artistic Journey, please send/post update pictures i love art dude. so much.

FHSKDLFJKSLDJF YOUR LIFE OR THEIRS. amazing joke i remember this !!! from the time i read half of this and promptly got distracted,, i'm sorry. looking at this, it's not even that long?? of a thing to answer??

YEAHHH people always say that audiobooks are great if you have trouble focusing on paper books or are busy and stuff and i Do Not Understand

!!!!! yes. this. that sounds wonderful and heck yeah! ideal house will trap you there forever but dw because it's voluntary and so nice <3

SUDOFIJSDKX AMAZING. bro i wish you were in my closet (in the least weird way possible i just. want to meet you irl) but !!! that's very swag. thievery <3 /hj but nonetheless that sounds like a very cool shirt.

mhmm i get you. i think the sheer amount of People being People would be too much, although it would be super cool to see a live concert performance thing,, yeehaw anywhoodles. !!! YEAH YEAH YEAH you've gotten me hooked on august is a fever lmao. a friend told me about motion sickness a little while ago and !! yes. very much agree.

ooh hm. i'd say operate by vesperteen and trying not to cry by cavetown (but. only the version on youtube. the spotify one's more electo-funky which is cool! but not exactly my vibe and it doesn't hit Nearly As Hard yknow)

!!! the little fuzzy gray willow bulb things. idk what they're called but they're so sOFT and wonderful. miss the most? probably being in person and at school with all my old friends. and i miss being good at school, which sounds all kinds of stuck-up but i think this might be my gifted child burnout year and Yikes. i miss,, i miss not worrying so much about gender. that's a lot of things but y eah.

i'm afraid that i'll drop my phone through the gap between the elevator car and the floor landing, because it'll just what. drop to the basement?? never be seen again?? and it looks like it could fit my phone but i can't be sure and i certainly don't want to test that theory shdfjskdl. something deep uhhh. i'm afraid that i'm lost in the sense of "everyone else knows what they want and i don't", or i'm afraid that i'm so wrapped up in myself and my thoughts that i just become. really goddamn stupid. idk dude i'm afraid of a lot of things usedhfjk

something mundane and something deep you're afraid of? what's something small that gets you excited? least favorite thing to receive as a gift? what color palette do you use on tumblr dot com? - 🌵

no literally and now i'VE taken forever to answer so i think. i think we're even. shfsdjfsdfkjsldfjslf

ahhh ok ok i have been doing random doodles in my notebooks and stuff so i will maybe spam u sometime!!

SDFJSLDFJSLFJ i wish u were in my closet too <333

oooh i will queue both of those songs rn and they will play while i answer the rest of this!! ill let u know what i think :D

okay update my wifi is out so i cant listen to them but I WILL LATER!!!

no no i also miss being good in school. switching from gifted kid to gifted kid burnt out stuff is literally the worst feeling im so sorry </33 also yeah gender... yeah

okay actually that is such a mood tho because i also have no idea what i want to do with anything and it feels like everyone around me is starting to figure it out and i just don't know

something mundane is probably just. bees. i am so fucking scared of bees every kind of bee even the ones ppl say are harmless. i legitimately get panic attacks sometimes and i just. can't do it. and ppl get ?? mad at me for this ??? theyre like oh but bees dont even wanna hurt u :( like okay im not trying to make them extinct im just saying i can't be around them without hyperventilating. thanks.

something deep.... definitely that my perception of myself is just 100% incorrect. i'm terrified that i've just completely misjudged myself and i'm nowhere near as self aware as i think, and that i'm nothing like how i've interpreted myself to be.

something small that gets me excited is for sure just going on my phone after a few hours of not being on it and seeing messages from friends. like. good morning messages or things sent while i was in class. things like that make me feel so <3333 like oh !! people think of me people like me that is so <3

least favorite thing to receive as a gift is for sure expensive things. i havent really received any but i just don't want to ?? like i would lose them really easily and for me theyre just objects so i wouldnt feel extra grateful?? idk. that doesn't make sense. but like for example someone gave me a super fancy pen for my birthday and like. okay thanks but it's just a pen?? i like normal cheap pens better sghsjdfsjf

dark mode dark mode dark mode !! might switch it to a halloween one tho for spooky season <3 probably not tho

what color palette are you on? whats your least favorite thing to receive as a gift? do you make wishlists for things? do you like floral patterns? what's something that made you angry today/recently? what's something that made you really happy?

#plu answers #radio silences #ash tag #greyson my greatly adored #cactus to my mushroom #cactus pal #🌵anon

[letluigisaythefword]

For the irl ask game thing I think your like. Very undercover about tumblr usage and things like that. Seem very normal. Maybe like some died hair, piercings? You look queer irl if you get what I mean? Chill in neither a engaged nor apathetic way. Don’t do bare minimum, will put effort into things but it’s not 100% unless you really want to. If you wanted to get a drink you would get up and get one. These are all guesses who knows !:)

i, this is so indepth, im not sure how to respond to this, dear anon /lh

yr definitely right abt most of these! im very neutral on other ppl knowing i have tumblr, kinda dont ask dont tell kinda vibes my hairs not dyed anymore, it faded :( but it is bleached! god, i wish i had more piercings, i just have earrings rn i Hope i look queer, thats the entire goal!!! very glad i convey chill vibes! however, if i wanted to get a drink i would sit and think abt how i need a drink for like an hour before getting distracted before i could get one bc i have Hell Brain:tm:

#thank u for the ask #as promised i will love u forever