@igodownwithmyshipz The Pumpkening™️ is happening
1. Scale ingredients. We measure by weight ‘cause it’s more accurate. Keep wet separate from dry (sugar counts as a wet ingredient).
2. Mix oil and sugar together.
3. Add eggs, mix. Scrape the bowl and mix.
4. Start incorporating dry mix into wet mix. Scrape the bowl again when this is all added.
5. Add the punkin purée. Pro tip: don’t drop a big blob of it onto the floor when you already don’t have quite enough. It will irritate you. And then you have to mop again.
6. Scrape the bowl again and mix for like thirty seconds. It will look nice and flufferly. Yes that’s the word I’m using. Don’t @ me.
7. Prepareth thine pans and tins with spray/paper of parchment or what-have-ye.
8. Scale out your batter into said pans/tins by weight or by measured scoopin’ device. I utilize both methods. Note: this is a full sheet cake, 18”x23” and I think it’s like about 13-1/2 pounds of batter in there. She’s gonna need a few extra minutes in the oven.
9. Make streusel for your muffins ‘cause you’re better than Dunkin’, damnit, and because the holy autumnal trinity of oats, vanilla and brown sugar is too strong to be resisted.
10. Bake them shits at 350 degrees (if you’re playing along at home, that is…this is a convection oven, so I drop the temp to ‘bout 330-335 degrees to compensate for the hotter temp/blower fan) until done. I don’t know how long that is, I just know when they’re done. I use the toothpick test for this method.
Will follow up with pics of the finished product. To make you jealous/hungry??? I don’t know. I felt like it was time to make these—I’ve been craving them.
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My favorite thing to bake is banana bread! I think baking is a nice way to pass time. I haven’t baked banana bread in a while. I haven’t really done much baking recently and I should really get back on that!
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Homemade chocolate Christmas cake
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How about this strawberry crunch cake I made last month 🥰 it was so freaking good and he loved it.
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for the yes or no game: would you bake with me?
OMG YES I WOULD! what are we baking?
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I made some cupcakes today. That is all.
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Mother's Day. It's a "holiday" that I just feel like it's not needed. All this pomp and circumstance to live up to. Kind of like New Years Eve. As a mom the best thing to do on Mother's Day is to leave me alone in the peace and quiet to do whatever it is I want.
That is not normally want happens thought because... obligations.
I decided to bake today to compliment the grilled salmon that I'm not taking care of :)
So I made Cinnamon Sugar cupcakes, half with a butter cin/sugar toping and half with a buttercream icing. Then I made two batches of corn bread. Why? Because I bought a quart of buttermilk for the cupcake recipe that called fro 2/3 cup. And instead of wasting it, which is normally want happens, I made the corn bread.
In hindsight this was too much and I've spent most of the afternoon in the kitchen instead of... other things. But we tested the corn bread and it is super yum.
The spoils of my efforts:
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I am making a funfetti cake in air fryer. Wish me luck 🍀
Update: it didn’t go well so I made the Oreo funfetti cupcakes instead on the regular oven.
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probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
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bruce, without batman would probably be the most ANNOYING parent at any and all of his kids' extracurriculars.
dick has a gymanstics meet, bruce is giving the pep talk of the century but absolutely slamming on the other kids, "you're the best thing walking, bradely cant even breathe the same air as you."
jason's on the debate team, bruce has spent the entire meet going "great point! that's my son!" relentlessly muttering about how jason might as well just be the whole team by himself at this point.
tim's in the robotics club and they're holding their annual robot games, bruce is barking in the crowd, front row, "cmon timmy you got this"
damian's art was picked for a charity auction, bruce is pulling out all the stops cuz his kid is better than everyone else's and so is work and he'll be damned if anyone's painting goes for more than his
bruce is just the most annoying, insufferable, asshole parent that's full tiger mom for his kids but like, hey, they're happy. all those kids walk out of each event with a new trophy, a new medal, a new plaque grinning from ear to ear, blushes on their face with their dickhead father right behind them happier than a pig in shit, as proud as he can be
in my head, pta dad bruce is an absolutely brutual soccer mom who operates under "fuck them kids" unless they're his 😭 that man is raising WINNERS
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little cats to send to ur favourite person 💌
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Oh real fast. That bread i baked came out fkn stellar I’m such a baking god
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Homemade strawberry cake - fraisier
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