you understand them, but do they understand you?
it's as if they don't care, you swore to yourself that. the only visits you got is when they are in extreme crises, wether it's near incurable disease or lack of money. you don't care, at least not anymore. you stopped sympathizing; they stopped caring.
symbiosis mutualism. your quote that is. an abondoned and near unreadable on the small corner of the large cave. an altar is placed in the middle, one covered in moss and it's filthy ugly by now. it's been exactly seven hundred thirty nine years of the last person to have ever visited. you wanted to blatantly yell curses at them, yet you also want to thank them to symbolize your gratitude.
stop hoping, you told yourself. an eternity of yours is spent under the large yet empty cave, sipping on your favored drink on your realm, seemingly never bored of it. by the time, you had went insane. grieving over your 'death' has turned to demonic wrath that it shook teyvat in a form of a rather small earthquake. be grateful I kept on holding back, you gritted your teeth, resisting the urge to just end a nation here and there. you are confused with yourself, why do I kept on waiting? who for, exactly?
the exact moment of eight hundred years passed by once again, filled with loneliness and lack of content. you choose to wake up, drink then sleep, and repeat. die, die, die, you wanted to die, but you just can't, why? or who, exactly?
Traveller, Knight of favonius, wielder of seemingly a thousand title, arrived at your cave with a floating yet no wings human-like creature. they bickered to themselves, muttering how cold the cave is, how uncomfortable your home is, how your forever home is just— unhabitable.
they are getting on your nerves. they are nipping on your patience; they are teasing your faith on waiting! couldn't take it anymore, you swore to yourself, finally choosing to speak up after eons.
"filthy human and a mascot companion, entered a holy cave, embarrassing themselves in front of a deity— do you have no respect?!"
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Hobie Brown Headcanons
long post ahead. will put as much as i can under the cut but i will have a.... loose table of contents.
and im not feeding you everything. i need more content to drip feed you later.
the inspo is driving me crazy but the hands are refusing to write.
the table:
backstory
food
british
animals
lmk if ppl want this to be split up into individual posts per category. cuz its l o n g
BACKSTORY:
Not based on the comics. purely my own attempt at writing his backstory and his particular villains.
Hobie's Doc Oc was a university professor pressured by Osborn's regime to produce weapons. Hobie had met the guy while crashing a university class, but nothing more than that. Octavius snapped and took the revolution to the extreme. he built a WMD and planned to use it on the city. Hobie talked octavius down and disarmed the weapon.
Hobie's lizard was his close friend and bandmate who got jealous over their lead singer's affections towards hobie. they were close friends until hobie started drifting away. curtis was bitter and never really forgave him. the final straw was when hobie returned in full, having just abandoned his spider suit. the band is back together but curtis still has hard feelings. he knew vaguely about hobie's connection with spiderman but thought that it was some kind of special deal or friendship which was just another nail in the coffin. he turns himself into the lizard and attacks hobie, demanding answers and refusing to listen.
the above is just an excuse to hurt hobie really bad >:3 i love my angst and my beating my muses up. i wanted to break his ribs.
electro was a civilian who just happened to get struck by lightning. he is the sole reason hobie has insulated all of his gear and one of the reasons all of his spikes can shoot excess electricity like one of those funky little electrode balls. hobie took one look at this guy and immediately got to work.
Kraven was a bounty hunter hired and possibly engineered by osborn and fisk to hunt down hobie. classic kraven activities. he tried to drown hobie in the thames. hobie managed to escape but couldn't breathe or eat properly for a week after the attack
hobie's ship was hauled from the local junkyard. It was originally just used as a figure head to lead the charge from the government locked dam blocking off water. it somehow survived so he uses it as his hq.
hobie is immune to his scorpion's venom after being stung so many times and stealing samples of it to build up an immunity. yes it hurt. yes it sucked. but it worked. (loosely inspired by a fanfic)
the above are not in chronological order. mostly.
FOOD:
Hobie's world doesn't have a lot of spices. it's a closed state unless importing 'important' materials like lumber, steel and other sciency stuff, food is a lower priority or just a restricted luxury. the spice trade has regressed to something like the 1600s where foreign spices are held by those in power purely as a status symbol. the common man might have access to salt, sugar and cream, but anything else- especially anything spicy- is a luxury item.
hobie would love spicy food. i just dont think he's gotten much exposure to it. day one out of e-138 he opened a bag of spicy chips in the cafeteria, touched one and exploded.
exotic/foreign fruits fall under this same category but for more legit reasons of travel and lack of safe storage. so for example: mangoes, oranges/citrus, kiwi, pomegranates.
boba would freak him the fuck out. he has no idea what those little jiggly things are and its only made worse when one of the kids inevitably shows him the hamster 'is it worth it' meme. he becomes scarred for life.
if you take too long to take a bite out of whatever you're holding and hobie is hungry, he will just lean over and take a bite out of it. sandwich? bitten. spaghetti? stolen off the fork. chocolate bar? wrapper and bar, gone.
his favorite flavor of cake is chocolate or caramel. sue me im projecting onto him
BRITISH
he holds out his pinky when holding cups. it's just an unconscious thing that turns conscious once someone calls it out. in which case he sticks it out even further
flips the police and the royal family off regularly with the one fingered or the two fingered version. will only respect the french for inventing the creative two fingered fuck you, but nothing else.
has a winter fit that is just like a pile of whatever sweaters he has and two scarves. and long socks that make the space in his tight boots even more tight. sometimes cuts off circulation to his feet.
loves going to pubs and just chatting with people. also loves picking fights with the drunk people. Particularly the irish. he thinks their accents are funny and has long arguments with them while they're both speaking absolute gibberish.
knows french but only the insults. has an arsenal of french insults he will just whip out of his back pocket and drop on someone's head.
not really a british thing but i bet he doesn't know how to ride a bike. he was a) too tall and b) not willing to get his entire skeleton rattled by riding over the cobbled streets of london.
wimpy's fan. (its like the british version of mcdonalds but less popular and less famous. according to my research).
ANIMALS
Hobie keeps pigeons. he built a little house when he was bored and was surprised to find three pigeons hiding from the rain underneath it the next day. he didn't really intend to keep them but they nested and he kept bringing them food and water. he did name the brown one hobie jr.
hobie has a cat. again, not really 'has' but rather 'it broke into his boat and wont leave'. he didn't name her because he can't think of a good one. for the longest time he had no idea she was living in his floorboards but later discovered a hole in the side of his boat and found a crawlspace just large enough for a kitten.
he is freaked out by snakes. not as in a fear of snakes. but rather in utter disbelief that they can be the size of a human person. he's read about and probably seen the average snake, about the size of an arm. but anything larger than that will make his jaw drop right off of his face
he did have a symbiote dog for a short time. the dog was badly hurt and the passive symbiote had merged with its body to try and help it. he offered it a place to stay and rest and it happily agreed. it followed him around for the short while they had together and one day went off on its own.
he still sees that dog around (affectionately named 'spider-mutt') and offers it head scratches or belly rubs but they always part ways sooner than later.
loves opossums. thinks they look funny.
part two? maybe....
might add more to this as my brain keeps turning.
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