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formulaonesmut · 7 months

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Better in red – CL16

important message

writers note: I have dyslexia, which means that writing is difficult for me, but I really want to continue doing this. Sorry if everything isn't always right!

Warnings: Smut 18+, P in V ( be safe!) sort of first time, sweet Charles turning into dom. Insecure reader.

Sorry for not posting this but I really don't like this fic, I don't know but I'm not happy with this one.

let me know who you want to be next!

this is my work and i do not consent to use this

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Saturday 19 November 2022 ahu Dhabi Final race,

Exactly on this day, 4 months ago you met the one and only Charles leclerc. A dream that came true. You started a year ago with your new job at F1, you started with being a extra hand. That meant that you helped with the interviews, making it ready, making sure everything was there in time.

Almost a year later your dream came out, you started officially working as a journalist for f1TV. And there it was, questioning drivers about their races was amazing but not the easiest job. And it didn’t got any better when you started to gain feelings for Charles leclerc. At first you thought that it was only a crush and he didn’t seemed interested, until 4 months ago. You were standing alone in the doorway, Charles passed by but within 10 seconds he called your name

´´yn is it right?´´ he smiled, offering you a hand, of course you took it before you gently shaked it.

´´ yeah i am. Is there anything wrong?´´ you blushed, he totally caught you off guard and you were already preparing yourself

´´ so ehm- im not really good in this, and if you don’t want too is that okay, but eh´´ Charles rumbled but you were quick in stopping him.

´´ hey, its okay! Go on spit it out leclerc´´ you chuckled, your finger pads slowly running up and down over his hand palm.

´´do you wanna go out with me?´’´

There is were it all started, and now you guys are dating. It still feels unreal sometimes, your dating the one and only CHARLES LECLERC!!!!!

Its weird and iknow many people wont believe you, but you guys haven’t had sex, or something you needed to be naked for. Yes hand jobs and fingering were something, but Charles knew that you just had sex, for once. He always letted you set the pace, and making sure YOU were comfy with it.

Maybe it was weird, but you guys didn’t wanted to make it official for the world, so you both decided to not share a room. This so no one noticed that you guys were almost a couple. And to be honest, it was hard to act normal when you were in the paddock. This guy had you around one finger and you loved him so so so much.

You were running late for your interview with Carlos in the Ferrari hospitality. Yes, when i say running you were running.

´hey princess´ Charles smiled when he saw you running through the halls.

Your eyes quickly scanned the room before running up to him.

´´ how late are you back? When are you done´´ Charles smiled down to you. God this guy.. so handsome, every time you saw him you just could not hold your self in and just started smiling.

´ may i.. kiss you?´ he asked you, his hand came upwards to cup your cheek. Brushing some hair behind your ear.

´yes .. please Charles kiss me´ you half begged him before he dipped down to your level and kissed you.

It felt so unreal and you just couldn’t stop searching for his touch, his fingers intertwined with your hair both off you don’t want to let each other go.

‘’ah here you are. Love birds I have a interview’’ Carlos chuckled before leaning in the doorway.

Carlos was the only one along side Pierre that knew that you guys are something. Not that you wanted them to know but they caught you already a few times kissing.

‘’I’m sorry Carlos’’ you sight before letting Charles go.

‘’I'm done at 6 babe’’ you smiled before giving Charles a quick kiss.

‘’good, see you tonight baby’’

- later that night –

When your phone ringed you immediately rushed too it, your hands quick in grabbing it and picking it up while you were fixing your hair.

´´ there is my pretty girl´´ Charles smiled through the phone.

´´ hi handsome´´ you smiled while your bottom lip was stuck between your teeth.

The call was innocent, a lot of talking about F1 and small other things. But something inside you snapped when Charles started whining.

´´ baby, cant you pleeeaaase come over i really miss you´´

´´ Charlie, you already saw me today´´ you smiled

Charles is really nervous because he is starting 3th tomorrow in the last race off 2022. There is a lot off pressure that’s on his shoulders, he is standing second with 290 points amazing right? Not really.. checo has the same amount off points and is starting second.

Charles was so hectic today, picking his hands, moving his leg up and down and he was talking non stop. That was for you a easy sign to see that he was nervous, and it wasn’t weird.

You knew you had to do something to take his mind off racing for a night, you knew you were ready and this was the perfect timing to.

You walked to your bed before laying on your belly, lifting yourself up on your elbows. So you were Giving Charles THE perfect look, your shirt was hanging down a bit giving him a sneak peak off your boobs that were covered in your new red and gold lingerie bra. you could see his eyes immediately shooting down, he was really trying not to look. But it just happened and he wasn’t sorry for it, Charles loved your body and always tried to help you start loving yourself.

´´ baby.. don’t make it harder for me to stay in my room´´ he smiled, his cheeks already heating and coloring up.

´´’what’s wrong handsome?´´ you questioned him, but of course you knew what was wrong. And once again his eyes shooed down and stayed there.

´’i can see my pretty baby’s´´ he smiled. ´´ oh come on baby, you know what i mean´´ Charles winked, his eyes quickly shooting from your boobs to your eyes.

´´oh? Do you want a better view so you can sleep well?´´ you teased back, Charles quickly nodded yes before you tugged your shirt over your head. Charles mumbled a quick ´fuck´ before he turned his head away, a big smile was on his face and his cheeks were even more red.

´´were are you staying handsome? I wanna come over´’

´´room 418, be quick. The door is already open´’ and with that Charles ended the call, and fuck he knew what your plans were.

The tension between you two was unwritable, from little teasing through out the day to sending him a photo in your new lingerie.

You were quick in chancing, grabbing only your phone and a bathrobe. You shooed it over your lingerie and rushed out, and yes. The door was already open and when you opened it you could only gasp.

Charles had changed into a white blouse, it was hanging open and the room was dark, but filled with candles. On the bed was drawn a heart and there was music playing on the back ground.

´I knew that you were quick´ he smiled before walking up to you, his hand brushing over your shoulder.

´´ you didn’t had to do this Charlie´´ you smiled while your eyes where wandering around the room.

´´ I wanted to make it special for my special girl´´

You could feel Charles his eyes burning on your skin, even when he stepped a little closer to you. His body pressing against yours, his warm breath on your skin and his eyes trying to look what you were wearing underneath the bathrobe.

´´ give me a kiss handsome´´

And within 3 seconds Charles his lips were pressed onto yours, his tongue parts your lips and you could feel his body shivering with desire,

Charles his hands shooed to the back off your thighs. That was a signal for you to jump into his arms, you slammed your legs around his waist without braking the kiss. And before you knew it your back was slammed against the wall.

´´fuck handsome´´ you moaned into the kiss, giving Charles perfect access to explore your mouth, Charles had trapped you between him and the wall, and on this moments he was so happy that he was an athlete.

You could feel that One off his hands sneaked upwards trying to open your bathrobe.

´´ no no Charlie ´´ you slapped his hands away from your bathrobe while you broke the kiss. Your head overloading with ideas. And one perfectly matched.

´´oh. Didn’t knew you were in charge´´ Charles smirked, that goddamn cocky bastard.

You softly pushed yourself away from the wall before jumping out Charles his arms.

´´what are you-´´ Charles frowned slightly before you pushed him backwards.

´´ come on sit ´´ you patted the edge off the bed. Charles wasn’t a person that loved to obey someone but today, he wanted to give you a chance.

´Your hands slowly moved up and down his chest and his breathing was already gaining up in speedy mode.

You slowly took a step backwards, your hands made a way to the knot in your bathrobe before untying it. The bathrobe perfectly fell from your shoulders, completely exposing your body in the brand new red and gold lingerie set.

It was the set you got from Charles, and he was always complaining about it. He wanted to see you in it.

´´ fuck... so pretty baby´´ Charles breath out, and just completely sat there, admiring your body. his hands came up to feel your body, almost as if he was dreaming this.

´´ fucking hell baby. you look so so good in red baby´´

And yes it was such a beautiful set! The bralette just covering enough off your boobs, it perfectly hugged your skin and it made your body look like you were on fire, but you still felt insecure about it.

Before Charles could talk again you took place on his lap, facing him and Each leg beside his. His mouth hung open and his eyes are locking in with yours.

´´you look so good baby.. Fuck your driving me crazy´´ he repeated, his eyes scanning you up and down again before reaching out for your hands. he could tell you a thousand times how good you looked.

´´feel what you do to me baby´´ he blushed, his hands took yours to his chest. Placing it on his chest so you could feel his heart beating.

´´fuck i cant take my eyes off you. and im so proud to call you mine´´

´´don’t stare so much Charles.. that’s rude´´ you chuckled but he definitely could hear the in secureness in your voice.

´´’don’t see what’s wrong with your body, your perfect the way you are I’m just disappointed that you don’t know how gorgeous you are´´ Charles smiled while one of his finger traced your jawline.

´´ its just.. i think i could be a little more .. trimmed´´ you sighed while looking down.

´´ Cherrie i love your body, everything you ´hate´ about it is what drives me crazy.´´ Charles smiled before softly grabbing your jaw, making you to look at him.

´´fuck you don’t know how many people in the paddock are looking at you when you enter i almost feel jealous the way they look at you´´ he told you. His eyes searching for yours before he brought you in a big long hug

Its almost weird how comfortable you felt yourself in his arms, it immediately felt safe

´´you don’t have to be shy or insecure around me okay? Your my perfect girl and i want you to feel special baby.´´ Charles smiled before he placed his hands on your waist, he adjusted you a little bit better on his crotch before his hands started to roll your hips over his crotch.

´´ mhm fuck Charlie´´ you breath out while you hid your face in his neck. Planting a few kisses in his neck while his hands kept rolling your hips.

Charles his hand shooed to your ass before grabbing the back of your thong, pulling it a bit upwards what made you moan. He pulled it backwards so it was more pressuring your clit and once his hands started moving your hips again you could only moan in his ear.

You have done this so much together, just like two honry teenagers. Grinding on each other, he even made you ride a pillow in front off him because you didn’t dropped your attitude.

´´fuck Charles please i need you so badly´´ you say while kissed his neck.

´´ you sure Cherrie?´´ Charles asked you, he waited 3 months long for his moment. But he had too make sure that you wanted this just as bad as he wanted.

´´ yes Charlie I’m ready and i want you now´´ you smiled while you tried to hide the blush that was coloring your cheeks.

´´ then you don’t hear me complaining, do you want me to be in charge Cherrie´´ Charles was always so caring and it really made your heart melt.

´´ you please. Please please pl-´´ before you could finish Charles connected your lips with his´. His tongue was exploring your mouth while he was quick in flipping you over so he was hanging on top of you, one of his hands came upwards to push the hair that had fallen in front off your face behind your ear before reaching his destination around your throath. He squeezed it gently but enough to make you head go fuzzy.

He took this as a opportunity to get more power over your body, he tilted your jaw up, placing kisses alongside it while his hand is still around your throat. And he clearly enjoyed the feeling when you swallowed.

´´ open that pretty mouth Cherrie´´ Charles demanded you, you were really quick in obeying. You opened your mouth and sticked out your tongue. A string spit quickly followed from Charles his mouth to yours.

´´now swallow it like a good girl´´ Charles breath out. The feeling off your throat moving underneath his hand gave him a powerful feeling. Small whimpers and whines were heard as he licked a stipe down your neck. Charles moved his attention lower, trailing more kissed to the exposed parts off your neck, before sucking a hickey.

You and Charles talked a lot about sex, so knew you that Charles loved to be in control but also loved your mouth, and he quickly knew that you loved it to got treated as a bad girl.

His mouth was lowering to the straps of your bra before grabbing one in his mouth. He carefully shoved it down your shoulder, the feeling of his stubble and the warm breathing on your exposed chest were giving you goosebumps.

When they both were hanging loose around your shoulders he easily flipped you around, his body still towering above you while he settled both knees on the outside of your thighs.

His both hands came down, his fingers tracing from your neck down, over your shoulders down to your bra, too your waist and stopping by your ass.

´´ such a beautiful back baby´´ Charles mumbled before pushing his hips forward, pressing his crotch against your ass, you could feel the outlines of his harding dick against your ass. Each off his hands layed on one of your ass cheeks before gently squeezed it.

´´oh god please... Charlie do something´´ you whined.

´´ I’m going to show you´´ he says while running his hands up and down over your bra before taking it off. ´´ who your god is Cherrie´´ he continued.

His fingers were playing with the end off your thong while he bended down and licked one long stripe up from your ass to your neck.

´´mmhm Cherrie turn around´´ he said while he hangs in a high plank above you.

And so you did, pushing yourself upwards just like a push up before coming up with your knee to help you. Your ass perfectly pushing against his crotch before you could turn around.

It made you both laugh because it seemed easier then it was. And just for a second you didn’t realized that your boobs were fully exposed to him.

´´ such as beautiful as i thought Cherrie´´ he smiled and leaned down to give you a quick kiss, his mouth immediately wandering down, to your jawline, neck and slowly down to your breasts. His tongue painfully slow running over your nipple before giving it a quick suck.

´´ please char do something, i cant- just cant wait any longer. I really need you´´ you whined out, your eyes were almost glued to his arms, those veins that were running over his arm, they looked like they were going to explode.

´´ you want my fingers baby?´ ´Charles groaned

´´ mhm´´

´´ come on use your words Cherrie, where do you want them´´

´´please inside me.. please daddy´´ you could see Charles swallowing by the nickname ´daddy´ even tho he never wanted to admit that he liked it.

He settled himself on his knees between your legs, after his hand quickly made work off your thong.

´´ spread your legs wider princess´´ Charles told you. He could see the scariness in your eyes and it wasn’t easy to just spread them, but you trusted him.

His finger easily found his way down to your already wet pussy, his fingers dipping into your wetness, spreading it over your pussy before circling his finger pad on your clit.

´´ so wet already´´ Charles mumbled ´´ come on darling let me hear you´´

It was scared but you tried to take your mind off that, the way charles his fingers perfectly circled over your clit made you already see stars.

´´fuck yes Charles!´´ you moaned out. Hands gripping the sweets. Nails digging into the fabric.

His finger teased your entrance before giving in and slowly inserted his finger.

´´fuck you feel so good already baby, cant wait to feel you clenching around my dick´´ charles moaned

Charles was definitely a talker in bed, and fuck that was so hot. The way he can turn you on so easily just by words.

His finger started pumping in and out you, those hands can make a woman dream so easily.

he brought his thumb to your clit. Circling it over your sensitive bud The squelching sound of your wetness reached your ears while he pumps his finger in and out you.

His thumb sets a faster pace on your clit, making your toes curl and your nails dig into your hand palm.

‘’ that’s it princess’’ he said while adding another finger , curling them upwards, making sure the pads of his finger where touching that sweet spot inside you, your body begins to shake, your walls clenching around his fingers.

‘’your going to make a mess on my fingers princess?’’ you nod while moaning heavily.

‘’’yes .. yes char.. I’m s-so close’’ your mind falls blank, just feeling and hearing his fingers inside you, touching constantly the sweet spot that was driving you closer and closer to the edge.

And then it just hits you, your back arched off the bed, goosebumps all over your body, toes curled while you moaned Charles his name.

Charles gave you a little bit time, his hands slightly massaged your upper thighs

´´ I’m not done yet baby, I know that you easily could have a second run without a brake´´ Charles winked before diving into your dripping pussy. His tongue perfectly lapping your clit while he pushed 2 fingers inside you, his fingers angled a little bit upwards. Making sure to hit your G-spot inside you.

‘’oh fuck ..’’ a slightly louder moan had slipped out, suddenly as his nose dragged over your clit perfectly while his tongue continued to make your toes curl.

He hummed in appreciation of your praise, sending vibrations through your core before he moved his lips to your clit, managing to slip a finger inside you.

‘’ come on princess, let the neighbors hear who you belong to’’ he practically cooed up at you, not wasting any time in adding a second finger, pumping them in and out you in a fast pace.

‘’ oh god charlie.. ‘’ you moaned out, stomach twisting. His lips where back at your clit, causing you to roll your eyes back. He did everything right every time, his fingers stretching you out did not make a wrong move as they thrusted in and out you, his tongue flicked perfectly over your sensitive bud.

´´ you taste so good Cherrie´´ Charles mumbled

You could feel yourself getting closer and closer, the knot in your stomach was already forming while Charles settled the pace even higher.

‘’char.. I’m c-close’’

‘’your not allowed to cum baby, keep it in I know you can’’ Charles commanded you.

His fingers perfectly hitting your G-spot while his mouth and tongue were perfect in stimulating your clit.

‘’i-i- cant ..’’ you breath out.

‘’you cant what?’’’ he asked you while he took his mouth off you.

‘’im so close I cant h-hold it’’

Charles didn’t wanted you to finish that quick because he had all the time to make you feel special. He took carefully his fingers out before licking them clean

´´you taste always so good baby´'he smiled before leaning down and kissing your forehead.

‘’you did so good baby’’ he whispered.

*not a while later* ( small time skip, don’t know what to put here XD)

You turned his hand slowly before you pressed the tips on his middle and ring finger against your lips, you gave them a kiss before slowly wrapping your lips around them.

A grunt rumbled through his chest as both fingers sat in your wet mouth, tongue running between and around them. You pulled them out before pushing them right back in, lips tight around them as you slowly moved your head back and forth.

Your hand drifted towards his waistband, Charles was quick in grabbing your hands.

´´let me help you please Charlie´´´ He was making sure you 100% wanted to, and not the feeling you had to. Charles was quick in letting your hands go as you dragged his pants down his muscular thighs. Leaving him in his tight white Calvin’s.

Painfully slow you pulled his Calvin’s down, his hard cock slapping against his lower stomach, the tip coated completely in pre cum. Charles had propped himself up on his elbows to be able to look at you.

´´mhm so big char´´ you blushed.

You teasingly pressed a kiss onto his tip, watching it as it twitched and smiled to Charles who had already his eyes closed in anticipation.

´´ mhm fuck baby you know you don’t have too right´´ you only hummed in responds before your lips closed around his tip. A hissing sound left Charles his mouth, this was the first time he had you around his dick.

Your mouth was slowly bobbing up and down, spit dripping from the tip down his shaft.

Charles thought he was dreaming this. Fuck you were so perfect and just what he imagined

You kept bobbing your head up and down, charles was big but you managed to fit it all. You had no idea what to do so you kept repeating your movements.

‘’your doing it amazing baby- so goo-d’’ Charles moaned one hand intertwined with your hair helping you to hold your hair out off the way.

´´ tu le fais si bien ma princesse´ ( your doing it so good my princess) charles moaned out when the tip hitted the back off your throat.

You sped up your movements a bit in witch charles twitched. Moans filled the room and gosh it sounded so good.

You clenched your thighs together trying to get some friction. Even tho you had the most mind blowing orgasm 5 minutes ago you felt yourself so horny. Your body was feeling hot and it was almost if you could cum without even touching yourself.

Charles his hand came down to your head his fingers intertwined with your hair trying to make a swift ponytail.

´´'is this okay baby.. Fuck!´´ he cursed when you took him down your Throat

´´look at me baby.. fuck those eyes..´´ you followed his instructions while you kept sucking him. When you made eye contact you could only moan.

But before you knew it charles gently tugged you off his dick. And all you could do is whine.

´´stop whining so much or i will make you whine baby girl´´

´´ make me.´´ you told him, your bottom lip tugged between your teeth. You had no idea where the confidence came from but you needed to say it.

´´oh?´´ he smirked before leaning down and almost swallowing your lips. His tongue danced against yours. His hands grabbed the back off your thighs before turning you around, making you lay against the headboard on your back.

His mouth found once again your neck, sucking a hickey. His hand came down to his dick before his tip runned up and down your folds.

´´merde tellement mouillé pour moi´ ( fuck, so wet for me) he groaned before he looked at you.

´´you still sure you want this baby?´´ he asked you.

´´yes yes yes charles please ... please i need you to fill me up please´´ you begged him, your legs slammed around his waist trying to pull him closer.

He was slow and made sure you were okay. He slowly pushed his dick inside you, making you moan out loudly. The tight feeling made charles see stars too.

The way he filled you up was perfectly, the stretch, the sound and not to forget the feeling it was so amazing. His dick already Pressing against your G spot as he stilled his movements, giving you a moment to adjust to his size.

´´fuck you feel so so good and tight baby´´ charles groaned. his fingers digging into your hip making you move a bit.

´´fuck baby´´ charles groaned ´´are you okay baby?´´

´´yes Charles please.. just fuck me” you moaned, rolling your hips into his making him groan.

You could feel Charles twitched at your words, his hips gaining speed. Your mind falling blank at the feeling. His dick perfectly hitting your G-spot making your eyes roll back in your head.

‘’fuck, eyes here darling’’ he muttered between the heavy breaths, one of his hands were on your throat, his finger pads digging into the skin. Making your eyes rolling back even more.

‘’I said eyes here princess” he corrected you, his hand was on your neck to hold you in place when the other one rested beside your head.

He had you under his grip, moaning at his touch and begging him to keep going. His lips kissing and pinching at your skin as loud moans escaped your mouth, his trust became harder and harder.

But out of nowhere he stopped, trying to catch his breath while pulling out you.

“Don’t stop Charlie pleas-“ you whined

‘’ get on all fours baby’’ charles commanded you,´´ get on all fours don’t make me tell you again´´

You were quick in obeying him, you felt 2 hands grabbing your ankles and pulling you to the edge. Making your knees hit the small couch that was standing before the bed while your chest was on the edge off the bed while Charles settled himself behind you.

He got quickly his pace back, hitting every sweet spot inside you, your pussy clenching around him making it even tighter then it was, he spanked your ass having you jolting forward. A load moan escaped your mouth when he slapped you again, harder this time

‘’please charles.. don’t stop.. I really want you’’ you whined out

At that moment he thrusted his hips into yours making sure to fill you full, before pulling out to the tip and slamming in again.

‘’fuck so tight.. ‘he breathed out. He laced his fingers through your hair, pulling it to his chest, so your chest was raised off the bed. With every thrust from charles in his new position, your hips were slamming against the bed edge, causing you pain but the feeling inside you barley even allowed you to register it in your mind.

You let a small giggle at his words ‘’you act like you didn’t like it but we both knew that was a lie’’ he pushed you back onto the bed, his hand that was in your hair was coming down to your neck, his finger slowly wrapping it around your neck as the other was grabbing your hip.

“Fuck you look so good with my dick inside you baby” he groaned

You were grabbing onto the bed so hard that your knuckles were turning white. Charles picked up his pace and with every thrust he was getting deeper than you even knew was possible.

“Ah- I’m so close-“ you breath out, your hands grabbing the sheets digging your nails into the fabric.

“I’m gonna cum” Charles moaned in your ear.

The knot in your belly grew bigger and bigger and before you knew you felt your orgasm take over you as he continued to thrust into you at a steady pace allowing you to ride out your high. Once your orgasm was complete you felt him fill you up.

“ you did amazing my cherrie”

#charles leclerc smut #formula one smut #f1 smut #f1 x reader #pierre gasly smut #carlos sainz smut #george russel smut #lando norris smut #max verstappen #max verstappen smut #formula 1 smut #daniel ricciardo smut #smut

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roseghoul26 · 1 month

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Charles Smith x gn!Reader

"Keeping your hand on his cheek, your lips brushed the shell of his ear. 'Although, I do think you looked rather beautiful.' He practically shuddered, a pleased smile on your mouth as you leaned back again. Keeping only a few inches between your faces, you watched as his eyes flicked down to your lips before returning up. 'Yeah?' You don’t think you’ve ever heard his voice so low." Synopsis: A brush with hypothermia forces you and Charles to camp out in an abandoned cabin. Having to resort to some more intimate means of survival, will you be able to keep your feelings in check for the hunter, or will the proximity force you to confess?

Tags: Fluff, Smut, Friends to Lovers, Hypothermia, Huddling for Warmth, yes this is a cuddle for warmth fic, idc if its cheesy, Oral Sex, Gender-Neutral Reader, Fem Anatomy for Reader, Face-Sitting, Love Confessions, but in a twist its not the reader who gets frozen, surprise!

Author's Note: listened to chappell roan the entire time while writing this (hence the title). i also got so distracted by stardew valley my addiction has returned also, there’s a moment where the reader touches charles’ hair. as a non-indigenous person, i’m not fully educated when it comes to hair and the importance it holds in native american culture. i did research, but i could still be wrong. if i have made any errors, please let me know, and i will change it.

If you never had to see snow again, you’d die happy.

Tightening the fur coat around your body, you tried to preserve what heat you had left in you. The cold air of Colter was like a leech, sucking you dry of any warmth and joy. And it wasn’t just affecting you, you noticed. Glancing around the room, everyone seemed to be in a similar situation, with as many furs and clothes on their bodies as they huddled around the laughably small fire.

The gang had been in Colter for about a week, hiding away from the law after the disaster that was Blackwater. You don’t remember much from that day, most of it a blur in your memories, but you remember the bloodshed. Pointless, ruthless bloodshed. You hoped you’d never see something like that again.

Shivering, you almost regretted giving your extra jacket to Abigail, who had wrapped it around Jack. You were only feet from the fire, but it might as well have been hundreds of miles away with the way it was doing nothing to warm you. With a huff, you rubbed your fingers together, simply sitting and passing the time until someone asked you to do something or you had to go back on guard duty. That was all you could do, really, the snow and remote location making it impossible for you to do your normal robbing and thieving.

There were many times during this week that you’d debated leaving the gang after you all made it out of Colter. You’d only joined about a year and a half ago, Dutch personally inviting you to his group after hearing about your notoriety across the states. Sure, it was nice to have a group like this, but this wasn’t what you signed up for, especially the events at Blackwater. You were promised opportunity and freedom, not brutality and hiding and cold-blooded murder. You wondered, would it be easy to slip away?

Sighing, you slumped forward, and your legs were numb from sitting on the hard floor. You were on the precipice of coming to a decision, but there were still some things preventing you from taking the leap. You’d become somewhat close with the members of the gang, your lone wolf attitude dissipating as you created bonds with the others. It was easy to get along with Arthur, the two of you becoming fast friends, frequently doing jobs together. You spent most nights chatting with the girls in camp, chatting until late in the night. You respected Hosea, and even Dutch for some time, the recent events shattering that respect for him. To some degree you’d created a connection with each member of the camp, keeping you tethered to one place.

There was one person in particular, however, that kept pushing those thoughts of leaving out of your mind. Charles Smith, the taciturn hunter that you’d become weirdly fond of these past few months. You’re not sure what you’d call your relationship with the man. The two of you were friendly, maybe even friends. When Dutch sent you out on jobs together, it always ended well, working together quite decently, if you’d say so yourself.

Still, you wished you were closer with him, but it wasn’t for a lack of trying. You found it hard to try and initiate conversation with him, never quite knowing what to say that wouldn’t make you seem like a fool. And when you would talk to him, it felt like you were just talking at him, but if he was annoyed by you, he never showed. He’d just politely nod along, adding a few words here and there.

But you knew he didn’t dislike you, finding him frequently looking at you around camp, just silently observing. Whenever you’d catch him, he’d just give you a polite smile, before turning away to do something else. Every time he did it, you found yourself grow bashful, your heart skipping in your chest. His starting was certainly not helping the infatuation you had with him.

Yes, your stupid heart had fallen for him, making it hurt to even entertain the idea of leaving. It was ridiculous and irresponsible to have feelings for him, and you knew that. They’d been there since he joined, and you figured that they would’ve gone away by now, but that was months ago. You’d never met a man like him before, someone so strong and fearsome, yet honorable and kind at the exact same time, and you figured that’s why you were so drawn to him.

Arthur knew about your feelings for the man, drunkley telling him during a night out at the bar in Blackwater a few months ago. He almost said something to Charles, who was somewhere in the same bar that night, claiming that ‘this life is unpredictable’ and ‘you gotta do somethin’ before it’s too late’, but you quickly shut that down with a swift kick to the shins. But that didn’t mean he stopped asking you if you’d done anything yet, and each time you’d respond with ‘no’.

You knew that Charles didn’t think of you that way. You’re unpredictable, reckless, fiery, everything opposite of what Charles is. Where you were chaos, he was calm. Fire, water. And you didn’t want to ruin what relationship you had with him, so you kept your mouth shut (and never got too drunk around him).

A gust of sharp cold wind and the creak of a door broke you from your thoughts, a shiver wracking your body as you turned to see who just entered the cabin. In some cruel timing from the universe, the man who had just been haunting your mind walked in, a fresh dusting of snow hitting the ground as he shook out his jacket. A chorus of greetings came from the group collected around the fire, a gentle smile coming from you before you turned back to face the fire. Charles calling out your name had you slowly turning to him again.

“Will you go hunting with me? The deer me and Arthur caught didn’t last as long as we’d hoped.” You now noticed the bow in his hand, along with a small quiver of arrows.

“I mean, sure,” you stood up, your cold muscles aching as you stretched, “but I ain’t much of a hunter, ya know. I usually end up scarin’ away animals instead of catchin’ ‘em. The others might be more well-suited for this.”

“But I’m asking you. And I can’t exactly do it myself.” Charles held the bow and arrows out for you to grab. “Is that a yes?”

“Yes.” Not like I could ever say no to you, you thought as you took the weapon and slung it over your shoulder, and secured the quiver on your hip. “Let’s go.”

With a nod, Charles opened the door, holding it open to let you step outside into the harsh Colter weather. Wincing at the bright light bouncing off the white snow, you were temporarily blinded as you made your way to where your horses were, Charles not far behind you. A light snowfall came down around you as you walked, not terrible visibility wise, but enough to be obvious. You just hoped that it wouldn’t pick up later.

There was probably a good foot-and-a-half of snow on the ground, making your movement sluggish and awkward. From what little you knew about tracking, though, it meant that it would be easy to pick up an animal's track, so for that you were somewhat grateful.

It didn’t take long for you to reach your horses, and you went to mount up, only to notice that your horse just wasn’t there. Spinning around, you looked to see if maybe she got unhitched and wandered somewhere nearby, but there was nothing. Whistling, you waited a few moments, seeing if you’d hear the sound of hoofbeats and winnings, but there was nothing. She was just gone.

As Charles mounted, looking equally as confused as you were, you turned and looked to see who was currently on guard duty, thinking maybe they had seen something. “Javier!” You called out, the poor man nearly jumping out of his skin at the sudden loud noise. “Where’s Hera?”

“Arthur took her!” He shouted back, and you couldn’t help groaning in annoyance. I’m gonna kill you, Arthur Morgan.

“And you let him?” Javier had made his way over to you now, and you saw him open his mouth to respond, but you stopped him with a wave. “Nevermind, it’s not your fault or your responsibility. I’m just… frustrated.” You took a deep breath, and a cloud left your lips as you exhaled. “Where’d Arthur go?” You heard the ground crunch behind you as Charles approached on Taima.

“I dunno,” Javier shrugged. “Him, Dutch, Micah, and Bill went out a few minutes ago, he’s been borrowing everyone else’s horse since his died. Guess it was Hera’s turn.”

“Well, shit,” you sighed, crossing your arms. “You don’t reckon they’ll be back soon, right? Maybe they forgot somethin’?” You missed the way Charles let out an amused huff, your back facing him as you conversed with Javier.

Javier lightly chuckled. “Look, if you need to go, I’ll let you use Boaz for a bit. It’s not like I’ll be needing him for a bit,” he gestured to the repeater currently in his hands. “If anything happens to him though…” he threatened, gesturing again to the weapon in his hands.

You were about to respond, but Charles beat you to it. “Or you could ride with me. If you’d like.”

You tried to keep your face neutral as you turned to respond, but you had to stop and glare at Javier who was sniggering. Apparently your facial expressions weren’t as subtle as you believed. Thank God you had your back turned, then.

You turned again, and when you weren't so rudely interrupted by Javier’s childish antics, you responded to Charles. “Are you sure?”

He extended his non-injured hand to you as he nodded. “We gotta get moving though. Only a few hours of sunlight left.”

“Alright.” You linked your hand with his, letting him help you on to the back of his horse with ease. Javier had long since left, already halfway back to his guard post, not before giving you a knowing smile. As you wrapped your hands around his waist, you tried and failed to keep your breathing even, your heartrate picking up substantially.

Sighing, you refrained from resting your head against his back. This was pure torture, but you knew you were going to enjoy it.

Thank you, Arthur Morgan… I’m still gonna kill you, though.

─•~❉᯽❉~•─

He wasn’t quite sure why he offered to let you ride with him on Taima; he was just making it harder for himself to stay away from you. He scolded himself, because someone else had your heart, and he would just end up hurting his own if he kept doing things like this.

The two of you had sped out of Colter, Charles setting a brisk pace that made the air bite at his skin. The pain was good, as it distracted him from thinking of you. You, who subconsciously shifted closer to him to shield yourself from the air. He felt you adjust behind him until his larger frame was shielding you entirely.

He expected you to have started talking by now, making some comment about the weather or cursing Arthur out. When you didn’t he felt himself start to grow a bit panicked. Did I make you uncomfortable? Is this too much?

He kept his voice steady, and he gently called out your name. “You’re awfully quiet.”

“I figure that must come as a relief.”

I could listen to you for hours, he thought. I don’t ever want to stop hearing your voice. “Are you alright?”

He felt you shift behind him, your hands tightening where they sat on his waist. Your touch wasn’t even improper, yet he still found his breath hitching in his throat. Charles just prayed that the howling winds around the two of you drowned it out. “I think so. It just… this place is really terrible.” When he nodded in agreement, you continued. “And I’ve got a lot on my mind. Blackwater, the gang, my future… It's a little bit overwhelming.”

“Do you… want to talk about it?” He offered, and you sighed.

“I… I can’t stop thinkin’ ‘bout Blackwater, ‘bout everything we did wrong, what we should’ve done differently, the choices we made. But I especially can’t stop thinkin’ ‘bout that girl that Dutch murdered. The way he killed her, no mercy or falter, I ain’t even seen nothin’ like that from him before. Or maybe I chose to look away before…” you trailed off.

“You’re not the one who pulled the trigger. Dutch is the only person guilty of that.”

“Maybe I didn’t pull the trigger, but I’m sure as hell ain’t innocent. I could’ve- should’ve done somethin’. There was plenty of time for me to.”

“Don’t go beating yourself up about the past. The only thing we can hope to do is learn from it and continue on towards the future.”

“But the future is just as terrifying as the past! I’m scared for the gang, for its future. We’ve become so bloodthirsty, and now all Dutch talks about is revenge.” Your voice was becoming more and more distressed. “Is that what we’ve turned into? A bunch of no-good killers who think with their guns? I ain’t- I don’t wanna be that. That ain’t what I joined up for.”

Charles didn’t know how to respond to that. He’d noticed that shift in the gang over the last few weeks, the members become quicker to jump to violence and bloodshed. He wasn’t a saint, the blood on his hands equal to yours, but he was even becoming disturbed by the amount of unnecessary killings happening.

“I’m thinkin’ ‘bout leaving.” Your voice was barely a whisper, like you were ashamed to say it. Charles stilled, shock running through his system. “Once we get out of here. This… this isn’t what I wanna do. I don’t wanna be associated with the Van Der Linde gang if it’s gonna continue heaidn’ in the direction it’s goin’. And I don’t wanna find myself at the end of a lawman’s barrel, noose ‘round my neck.”

“Oh.” Charles found himself at an impasse; did he just keep his mouth shut, or say something that might reveal too much? If you truly wanted to leave, then he didn’t want to guilt you into staying by revealing his true feelings. He understood why you wanted to leave, those same thoughts frequenting his mind as well, but he’d found a reason to stay: you. He hadn't told Arthur that when he asked why Charles was still hanging around a few days ago. His conversation with the other man when they hunted had solidified his stay with the gang, for better or for worse.

Did you feel the same way? You fool, Charles chastised himself. They don’t want you that way.

“Does anyone else know?”

“No,” you sighed. “You’re the only one.”

A selfish part of him was glad that he was the only one that knew, but he quickly pushed those thoughts away. “Well,” he began, “the only thing I can say is to not do something that you’ll regret… and just know that there’s a lot of people here that will really miss you if you decide to leave.” I will miss you so much that it hurts.

He felt your head connect with his back as you slumped forward, and he jolted at the contact. “Why can’t you just make the decision for me, Charles? I trust your judgment.”

Stay. Please, stay, he screamed in his head. “I can’t tell you what to do, how to live your life. Unfortunately, the decision comes to you,” was his reply.

“You’re right. You’re always right, Charles,” you laughed half-heartedly. “I haven’t made up my mind yet. Still got a ways until I have to.”

“Whatever decision you come to, I’ll support you.” Liar. “Just… don’t leave without saying goodbye, you hear?”

“I promise. Now,” your usual chipperness returned to your voice, “where are we headin’?”

He explained that he was taking the two of you to Lake Isabella, following the Spider Gorge down. The lake had started to melt, meaning animals were more likely to start coming out as the weather warmed. As the two of you rode, you kept close to him, significantly closer than you were when you left.

Charles pretended not to notice.

─•~❉᯽❉~•─

There wasn’t much to look at on the ride down. Everything was white, splashes of black rock breaking up the monotonous landscape, and the occasional tree made itself known. There weren’t any animals, not even a rabbit. It was like you and Charles were the only living souls in the area.

You only spotted a couple of buildings, two of them a small cabin that could house one or two people. One was absolutely destroyed, time and weather causing the ceiling to collapse in, only a skeleton remaining. The other still stood, smoke coming out of the chimney, but you had no idea if the occupants were home or not.

Taking a mental note of the building, before returning your attention back forward. Charles seemed to be content with just riding in silence, so you settled against him, your head nearly resting on his shoulder. You hadn’t meant to spill so much to Charles, and you certainly hadn’t meant to tell him that you thought about leaving. It’s just that you felt so comfortable with him that you couldn’t help the words from coming out, and you felt ten pounds lighter because of it.

You didn’t want to drag another person into your troubles, especially over something so trivial in comparison to what the rest of the gang was going through. A part of you wanted this to be the moment in all those cheesy romances you read where the love interest confesses their feelings in order to make the main character stay. But this was real life, and this was Charles you were talking about, the man who would put everyone’s needs before his, even if it hurt. And besides, Charles had never done or said anything that gave you the impression that he had feelings for you. From what you could tell, he saw you as a friend, and nothing else.

Right?

God, you were so desperate for the man you held on to.

He made no comment when you did actually rest your head on his shoulder. If he did ask why, you’d just say you were cold. You knew you just wanted to pretend that he was yours.

Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath. It did little to calm your erratic heart.

Eventually, the partially frozen Lake Isabella came into view. This area wasn’t too unfamiliar to either you or Charles, having been there a few days prior to dispatch a group of O’Driscolls. Having opened your eyes a few moments prior, you were able to make out a few deer drinking from the newly exposed lake water. You gestured to them, but Charles had already seen them, bringing Taima to a halt behind a large bush.

By this time, the snow had begun to pick up, the sheets coming down obscuring your view ever so slightly. But it wasn’t enough to force you indoors.

Dismounting as quietly as you could, you readied the bow in your hands, letting Charles lead the way as he snuck closer to them. It was almost supernatural, the way he was able to move so silently. For someone of his stature, you’d never expect him to be able to move so quietly and with such ease, yet here he was. You tried your best to move like him, taking a bit longer as you followed in his footsteps. Charles led you around the edge of the lake, the shore edge mere inches from your feet, occasionally splashing against your shoes.

Luckily, the deer hadn’t noticed either you or Charles, still drinking without a care in the world. He had stopped by now, moving to the side to let you move ahead. The deer were in range by now, and you only needed to move a few feet closer, making you halt underneath a large tree. The branches drooped under the weight of the snow, a few globs falling off and hitting the ground around you.

Weirdly enough, you felt at peace. Not because of the hunting, but because of the man who stood a few yards behind you. You felt safe under his gaze, like nothing could hurt you. As you drew the arrow back, you let out a confused noise as the deer suddenly scattered, spooked by something you couldn’t see.

You turned to look back at Charles, but you realized then that you probably shouldn't've had your guard down so much. A large weight dropped on you from the tree, too heavy and too warm to be just snow. You let out a startled cry, blocking out Charles shouting out your name, panic seeping into his voice.

Whatever fell on you landed on your back, your face pressed in the snow as you lay on your stomach. It clicked now that there was someone on you, a hand yanking your head back by your hair, warm breath assaulting your face as your attacker spoke. You couldn’t quite make out what exactly he was saying, snow and shock causing your hearing to be spotty. All you were able to make out were a few curses, the word “kill” multiple times, and some racist phrases aimed toward Charles.

Even before the initial shock had worn off, you were fighting back, squirming and moving desperately against the man’s grip. He just laughed, then you heard the unmistakable sound of a gun being cocked. He rested the barrel against the back of your neck, the cold metal pressing against the exposed skin. Dread washed over you, numbing your senses far beyond what the cold could do. With the way the man gripped your head, you couldn’t move it, and you strained your eyes as you looked around, desperate to find Charles. Is he alright? Please, let him be alright.

You saw a flash of movement out of the corner of your eye, and as soon as the weight was on you, it was gone. An alarmed yell left your attacker as he was tackled off of you, being pushed a fair distance before falling onto the frozen Lake Isabella. Rolling over, your hand fell into the cold water, and you quickly pulled it back.

Standing as quickly as you could, the world spun for a moment, your body confused with the many different orientations you were just in. Pressing your back against the tree for stability, you watched as Charles and your attacker rolled far across the ice. You saw the distinct green handkerchief around his neck, and you couldn’t help the exasperated groan that left you. No matter where you went or what you did, you couldn’t escape the O’Driscolls.

Shouts from behind you had you spinning around, quickly drawing your revolver, the bow long since discarded on the ground. Three more O’Driscolls came running from the woods, only a few yards away from you now, their cries of alarm coming from the two bodies of their members lying in the snow, which you had just noticed. Keeping your aim steady, you took three shots, the gunshots cracking through the still air. The first one hit right in the heart, the second one finding a home between his eyes, and the third one hit the final O’Driscoll right above the shoulder, merely grazing the skin, and the only non-fatal shot. Still, it caused all three of them to hit the snow.

With the final man falling relatively close to you, you ran over to him. Pulling him up by the scruff of his shirt, you held your revolver right below his chin, the hot metal burning his skin. He could not have been more than eighteen years old, a sliver of childhood innocence still left in his eyes as he stared up at you, fear and pain rendering him mute. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” You snarled, pressing the barrel harder into his skin. “Gimme one good reason why I shouldn’t kill you right here, boy?”

Your words seemed to go in one ear and out the other, a few tears leaving him as he stared at you blankly. He was shaking, and you wondered how long he’d run with the O’Driscolls for. He was obviously young, and if this was his reaction to being held at gunpoint, you gathered that he didn’t have a whole lot of outlaw experience under his belt. Against every instinct in your body telling you otherwise, you felt yourself loosen your grip on the boy, a pang of sympathy running through you.

Sighing in exasperation, you holster your gun, a relieved noise leaving him as you did. Glancing forward, you saw two horses hitched to the trees, seemingly the rides that they came in on. “Go,” you waved. “You ain’t even grown.”

“Th-thank you!” He nearly wept, getting to his feet shakily.

“But if I ever see ya again, especially as a damn O’Driscoll,” your hand hovered above your weapon. “I’ll not hesitate to put a bullet in your head. You hear me?”

“Y-yes.” He clutched at his shoulder.

“Now go!” you shouted. “Get outta here! Before I change my mind.” As soon as he sped off toward the horses, you turned back toward the lake. Charles stood above your attacker, beating the life out of the man, his face pure crimson. He was using his injured hand, but he paid it no mind. Blow after blow, Charles’s strikes hit true, the thuds echoing across the water.

You really should not have found it as attractive as you did.

You let yourself watch for a few moments longer, before you were snapping out of it. “Charles!” You called out. Immediately, he was looking up at you, the man below him no longer even on his mind. Wiping away a smear of blood on his cheek, he slowly made his way toward you, his steps slow across the ice.

Concern etched across his features as his eyes raked over your body, looking for any injury or hurt on you. “Are you alright?” You asked, trying your best to push down the flush of your cheeks as he stalked towards you. He had an almost murderous glint in his eye, his movement predatory; you especially should not have found that attractive.

“Did he hurt you?” He completely brushed off your question, his eyes wide with panic. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him this disheveled and worried before.

“Only my pride.” You sighed. “I’m sorry.”

Charles opened his mouth to respond, but was promptly cut off when the ground beneath him gave way, the weakened ice no longer strong enough to hold him. Immediately, he was submerged under the water, but luckily he was close enough to the shore that it wasn’t too deep. He reemerged seconds later, sputtering and coughing.

As soon as you heard the crack of the ice, you were running toward the edge, stepping precariously on the ice. In retrospect, it wasn’t the smartest idea, especially when you started walking towards where Charles fell through, but at the time you didn’t care. All that mattered was getting him out.

Scanning around, you quickly assessed the best way to save him. The hole that was created was way big enough so he could get his arm up, but as soon as he pressed at the ice it shattered, unable to hold anything. As you stepped closer, you felt it begin to break as well, and you quickly moved back to the shore.

“Fuck…” your hands went to you head, your gloved fingers pulling at your hair. A large stick from the tree you assaulted jumped down from sparked an idea. Grabbing it, you started chipping away at the ice, smashing and breaking it until a path big enough for Charles to go through was created. Standing at the shore, however, you realized that neither your arms or the stick was long enough to reach the man, who was starting to get dragged down from the weight of the water in his clothes.

Quickly unhooking your lasso from your belt, you created a loop for him to grab on to, throwing it at him with an accuracy from years and years of practice. It landed right in front of him, and he grabbed on to it as quickly as he could, his movement sluggish. Wrapping it around your hands, you began to pull him to shore. “Hold on!” you shouted at him, and he let out a noise in response. You’d take that over nothing.

It wasn’t incredibly hard to pull him closer, the water helping carry him over. But once he got to the shore, and you discarded the rope, pulling him up onto the land proved to be almost impossible. Grabbing underneath his arms, you pulled with all the strength you had, the muscles in your back and shoulders crying out in pain, but you paid them no mind. It took an incredible amount of effort, but eventually he was fully out of the water, laying splayed out in the cold snow.

You didn’t let yourself get a moment to recover, instantly running over to his side. Turning his head toward you, you let out a sigh of relief when you say his eyes flutter open. He was absolutely drenched, his heavy winter gear made even heavier with water, and you watched him begin to shake and his teeth begin to shatter. And, if your luck wasn’t already terrible enough, a full on snowstorm had started, causing cold blasts of snow and wind to pelt your bodies. Chalres shivered even harder, and you let out helped sit him upright. “We gotta get you indoors, and soon. You ain’t gonna-” a lump formed in your throat at the thought. “It ain’t gonna be good for you if you stay out here. I’ll need your help, though. I can’t lift you on my own. Just… just find what energy you can to get up. Please.” You couldn’t help the panic in your voice. To say you were scared would be an understatement.

You’re not quite sure he fully comprehended what you said, but he started to get up, and you forced him to lean a bit of his body weight against you as he did so. When he was up, you slung his arm over your shoulder, nearly sagging under his weight as he nearly collapsed. You called for Taima, whistlin the same pattern you’d heard Charles use for her.

Within seconds, the sound of neighing and hoofbeats filled your ears, his loyal steed coming to a halt right in front of the two of you. She let out a worried snort, and you reassured her with some soothing noises. “Alright, Charles. Here comes the worst part.” It took quite a bit of maneuvering and effort, but after a minute Charles sat where you did on the ride there.

His eyes, which were onced unfocused and confused, had regained some clarity to them, and you heard him mutter out your name. You smiled as reassuringly as you could, before you were mounting up on Taima, sitting in the saddle and the reins in your hands. “Hold on, darlin’.” You were too panicked to notice the name slip out, and you took the gasp from Charles as being from the cold.

With little urging, Taima moved forward, almost immediately breaking into a gallop. You led her back up the trail, heading toward the cabin you saw on the way down. It would take too long to return back to Colter, and with the way the storm raged around you, you doubted either of you would be able to make it.

As you rode, you felt Charles slump against you, exhaustion taking over his body. You reached behind with one hand, grabbing his knee and shaking him awake. “I know you hate me right now, but I need you to stay awake for me… please.”

He grumbled something in reply, his speech slurred and indecipherable.

“I’m gonna talk at you, like I always do,” you tried to joke. “And you’re gonna do what you do, which is nod along and pretend you care. Just… just stay awake. You hear me?”

“I care…” you heard him protest, and you just shook your head.

“Uh-huh.” The wind was biting into your cheeks, and your eyes were watering, but you didn’t dare slow. You filled the couple minute ride with your voice, telling stories of your childhood, or random anecdotes you’d picked up from your travels, to recounting the bar fight you’d gotten into a few weeks prior. Charles, despite being exhausted, kept alert, giving one-word responses from time to time.

He shivered the entire time, and you couldn’t tell if that was worrying or comforting. Panic was steadily bubbling in your chest, finding it hard to keep focus on your stories. Halfway through the ride, much like you did, he rested his head on your shoulder, burrowing his face into the crook of your neck. You suppressed a surprised noise as you felt the freezing skin against your own, his nose and lips unnervingly cold.

“Stay with me, Charles.”

─•~❉᯽❉~•─

It was cold.

Everything was cold.

Could hair get cold? It sure felt like it. Charles had never felt such coldness in his life before, and he never wanted to experience it again.

He should’ve never gone on to the ice, his brain was screaming at him.

But he had led with his heart, shoving the man off you and following him on to the ice. As soon as he had seen you go down, the other man on top of you, it was like time had slowed down. He had seen red, the two men attempting to hold him down quickly meeting their ends at the hands of his fury.

He prided himself on being able to keep calm in situations, his anger rarely ever taking a hold of him, and it had never happened since he joined the gang. Guess that streak was broken now. Not that he had any regrets.

Well, he had a few.

He should’ve registered the footprints in the snow leading up to the base of the tree. He should’ve noticed something was wrong, should’ve not been so distracted by you. He should’ve said something.

Maybe none of this would’ve happened then.

But he’s just a man, and man is selfish. He was glad this happened.

Without this happening, he wouldn’t have his arms wrapped around your body, his face buried into your neck breathing you in. Without this, you wouldn’t have called him darling, causing his heart to thump erratically in his chest. Without this, he wouldn’t have been able to pretend right now that you and him were more than friends, a fantasy that he had played out a million times in his dreams.

You were talking to him, but he couldn’t make the words out. A shiver wracked his body, and he burrowed deeper. God, he was so cold. And so tired.It would be so easy to just close his eyes, to let unconsciousness wash over him…

He was jolted awake by a hearty shake of his knee, and he heard your voice break through the fog of his brain.

You had such a lovely voice. He hated how worried it sounded, and all because of him. Or maybe he was happy you were worried about him. He couldn’t tell. Everything was unclear. The only thing he was certain about was the fuzzy feeling in his chest that grew with each glance and each soft word from you.

He was in love with you.

Stupidly in love, in fact.

He couldn’t stop himself, the words tumbling from his lips like a freefall. But it came out as gibberish, and he felt you shake your head, unable to comprehend him.

That’s alright. He’d repeat it as many times as you needed.

And as another shiver tore through him, he felt you rub his thigh reassuringly. Despite the thick material of your gloves, he could feel the warmth of your skin, practically burning against his frosty skin. The butterflies in his chest bubbled to life, and he couldn’t stop the small laugh he let out.

He was infatuated.

─•~❉᯽❉~•─

The short ride felt like forever, the monotonous landscape that had once been soothing now tormenting you as you searched for the cabin you saw prior. The smoke trail was impossible to spot out in the snowstorm, so you used what limited navigation skills you had to get you there.

Eventually, the frame of the cabin broke through the sheet of snow, and you nearly cried in relief. You were starting to freeze, and you couldn’t even begin to imagine how Charles was feeling. Taima huffed as you brought her alongside the entrance, the steam from her snout dissipating instantly. Quickly dismounting, Charles nearly fell off when you moved, slowly slipping into unconsciousness.

“Oh, no you don’t,” you snarled, roughly shaking him awake. Yes, you were threatening the hypothermic man. No, you did not care. You were almost inside, and you were not going to lose him. “Do not pass out on me, Charles Smith. Now, let’s get you off Taima.”

Charles muttered out an apology, his eyes reopening as he struggled to get off. His clothes were starting to solidify, clumps of ice forming across his jacket. You helped as best you could, catching him when his feet made contact with the ground, nearly sending you both to the snow. Again, you slung his arm over your shoulder, your other arm holding your gun as you entered the cabin, ready to clear out any homeowners.

A blast of heat hit both of you as you creaked the door open slowly, and you heard Charles sigh with relief. A quick scan around proved that it was empty, and you gently set Chalres in front of the still burning fire. You realized now that the occupants were probably some of the O’Driscolls that just jumped you, and the cabin now stood empty for you and Charles. Relaxing slightly, you put away your gun, then added a few more logs to the fire pit, the flames lapping at the wood eagerly.

To call the cabin small would be an understatement. It was large enough to fit both you and Charles comfortably, but you can’t imagine that the few O’Driscolls camping here temporarily had a lot of legroom . A single twin sized bed was lined up against the wall, cloth and other materials covering the windows beside it. There was a fireplace, a small stewpot, a nightstand, and a chair. Extra sleeping bags and rugs adorned the floor, a few cans of fruits and vegetables scattered across the floor. You saw the occasional empty bottle of alcohol, and you even found a pack of cigarettes.

Charles seemed to wake some, the warmth of the fire breathing some life back into him. You saw him look around, body still shaking. He looked even worse than you thought, his normally warm-toned skin devoid of any color, and his hair was plastered to his face. As you crouched down in front of him, you went to push back a few strands, your gloves long since discarded, but you refrained.

“A-Are you alright?” You heard him ask again through chattering teeth, and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes. Even though he saw freezing, likely suffering from hypothermia, he was more worried about your well being.

“I’m not the one who fell into the freezing lake. What were you thinking?” You weren’t angry, your words surprisingly gentle despite the fear in your heart.

“I-I wasn’t… I-” his body cut him off, shivers wracking his body.

“We gotta get these clothes off of you,” you picked at the offending garment, the material barely budging. You started to work the heavy coat off his shoulders, the roaring wind outside the only noise.

Suddenly, Charles was grabbing at your wrist, stalling your movement. You were halfway done with taking it off, the water melting off of it coating your hands. “Taima…” you heard him say.

“I’ll go make sure she’s secure,” you quickly rose to your feet. “Just get undressed. We need to get you warmed up.”

Stepping outside, the gusts hitting your body caused you to let out a curse. Taima was still where you left her, stomping impatiently in the ground, shaking out her coat as she tried to keep warm. When you clicked your tongue, she came prancing over, ready to get out of the wind.

You led her to the attached stall, which was in pretty decent condition. It blocked out a lot of the wind, and it shared a wall with the fireplace, letting some of the warmth to the horses as well. There was some hay left scattered on the ground, and you took off her saddle, setting it on the stand. You left the horse blanket on, giving her some extra protection.

When you were done, you moved to leave, and you felt Taima brush affectionately against your head, nuzzling her snout into your shoulder. Laughing, you pet her neck affectionately before she removed herself to continue eating at the hay. Making sure the gate was secure, you headed back into the cabin.

Charles was still undressing when you entered, his back to you. Even his undershirt was soaked through, the material clinging to his body like a second skin. It was at that point it clicked that the man you were infatuated with was going to be bare before you soon. You found yourself turning away, uncharacteristically embarrassed, shrugging off your own jacket and laying across the back of the chair. If it was any other person, you’d’ve not reacted this way, your lifestyle not allowing for much privacy. But of course it had to be Charles getting undressed in front of you, and you found yourself growing quite warm.

Taking the lasso from your belt, you strung it across the room, making a makeshift clothesline to hopefully dry his clothes faster. His jacket, which was a wet pile of fur, was the first to be hung up, the rope creaking precariously under the weight. Luckily, it held, and you added each new item as he took it off.

You made sure not to look directly at Charles, and you saw in your peripheral vision as he worked off his shirt. Your throat was suddenly dry, hands shaky as you continued to hang items up. Why, out of all people, did it have to be Charles? It was like God was tormenting you, giving you what, but keeping it just out of reach.

You must’ve made a noise, because Charles was turning toward you, concerned. You finally let yourself look at him. He was partially done unbuttoning his shirt, the collar open, but you saw that he was struggling with the small buttons, his fingers barely working. “May I?” you asked, gesturing toward his shirt. The sooner he was out of the wet garment, the better.

He paused for a second, contemplating. “Yes,” he consented, lowering his hand at his side. Stepping forward, your hands resumed his work, quickly undoing the rest of it. Do not make a big deal of this, you repeated in your mind. You were simply helping a friend not die from hypothermia, not unbuttoning the shirt of the person you were hopelessly in love with. He shrugged it off, practically peeling it from his body. You were especially careful to only look him in the eye now, not daring to look at his newly exposed chest.

Turning your back to him to hang up the shirt, the unmistakable clang of his belt hitting the floor had you stilling. Exhaling shakily, you heard him take off the remainder of his clothes, all making themselves comfortable on the floor. You didn’t dare turn around to grab them. Instead, you headed towards the bed, pulling off the heavy duvet. Walking backwards, you held it out to him behind you. You heard him murmur out a small thanks, taking the blanket from your outstretched arms.

You gave him a few moments. “Are you… decent?” you asked, keeping your gaze up even with your back turned. When he gave a noise of confirmation, you finally turned back around. After situating his discarded clothing, you gathered some of the canned goods strewn about before setting your boots next to Charles’ beside the fire. You sat down next to him on the various furs and bedrolls. Charles had the blanket wrapped around his body, and you tried really hard to not concentrate on the fact that he was completely bare under the duvet.

You opened one of the cans with your knife, tossing the lid of it behind you and handing it to the man beside you. “Eat. You need to get your strength up.” You saw him open his mouth to protest, but you cut him off before he could. “There’s plenty of food for the both of us. Now, eat.” You pushed the can of what looked to be sweetcorn in his hand, and he finally took it, tipping it back into his mouth and eating slowly.

He was still shivering, but he was slowly becoming more and more alert, and his teeth had ceased their chattering. Quickly finishing the can of food, he placed the empty can beside him, rubbing his hands together beneath the blanket. You were looking into the fire, and you could feel his eyes on you. He didn’t say anything, just observing you like he normally did.

This time, however, it felt like his eyes were picking you apart, like he could see every secret beneath your skin. Clearing your throat, you stood up, gathering up the remainder of his clothing and hanging them up. You were scared that the longer you sat by him, the likelihood of you having to confront your secrets would increase tenfold. “You need anythin’? More food? Water? Coffee?” You asked, drying your hands on your pants.

“I’m g-good,” he responded.

“Have you warmed up at all?” He shrugged in response, the action barely noticeable with the heavy blanket around his shoulders. You didn’t bother to hide the concerned frown on your lips as you crouched beside him. Running the back of your hand, you winced when you were met with deathly cold skin. “Shit…” you cursed, pulling your hand away, and you failed to notice Charles chasing after your warmth.

Standing up, you began to pace the room, trying to keep the dread you felt at bay. Your mind was running wild with thoughts, all ending in worse case scenarios. Taking a deep breath, you tried your best to keep calm, just for Charles’ sake. You wouldn’t do him any good if you were freaking out. You tried to think back on the basic first aid you’d learned through the years. Most of the things you’d already done, like getting him out of wet clothing, getting him food, getting him in front of a fire. Was there anything else you could do? Or did you just have to sit and wait and pray that what you did was enough.

You knew Charles was watching you pace, doing nothing to calm your racing heart. You ran your fingers through your hair, a gasp leaving your lips when you finally remembered. Body heat, which means… oh.

Goddamn it all.

You hoped you didn’t look too alarmed. It’s not that you were opposed to the idea, but it would make it significantly harder to bottle up your feelings. In fact, doing this might just smash the bottle all together, causing you to spill your heart to him. “So…” you began nervously. How the hell were you supposed to ask this?

“So…?” Charles repeated, raising a brow.

“I-I… well…” you ran your hand over your face. The wall was looking quite interesting right now. “I was wondering if you’d like… I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable or anythin’... if you’d like for me to share my warmth?” That sounds so weird. “It’s just, you’re not gettin’ any better… and I don’t want anythin’ to happen to you. I couldn’t bear it.” The last part you whispered, and you doubted he even heard it.

Something flickered across Charles’ face, too quick for you to recognize. He looked conflicted, and you chewed nervously on your lips. Did I cross a line? Oh God, did I make this weird? He’s gonna hate me-

“I’d like that,” his voice cut off your minds’ rambling.

Letting out a breath of relief, you gave him a small smile, which he returned. Okay, this is happening. Again, do not make a big deal of this. This means nothing. Your hands, which weren’t steady, began to work at your button up. Charles slowly looked away, his eyes darkening slightly. “I’m not gonna take everythin’ off,” you reassured, taking the look in his eye as concern. Taking your gun belt off and setting it on the bed, your pants and socks were off next, joining the belt, leaving you in only your undergarments.

Slowly, you approached him, your steps uncertain across the bedrolls and furs. You tried to keep calm, but the reality of what was going to happen quite soon was causing your heart to pound against your ribs. He watched you approach, head turned back around. You couldn't imagine it was comfortable for his neck, but he didn’t seem to mind.

Finally, you stood in front of him, partially blocking the fire, which caused your shadow to cast over Charles. Without breaking eye contact with you, he pulled the blanket back, inviting you in. Your shadow, thankfully, blocked out any newly revealed skin, but you still found a blush creeping up your neck.

Without giving yourself a chance to back out, you sat yourself on his lap. With your legs wrapping around his hips, your ankles were barely able to interlock. His following sigh sounded pleased, and you found yourself smiling as he wrapped the blanket around the two of you, creating something akin to a cocoon. He kept his hands braced on the ground beside him, refraining from touching you.

Charles was indeed freezing, and you let out a discontent noise at the contact. “Sorry,” you more felt than heard him say, your faces mere inches apart.

“I should be the one who’s sayin’ that…” you sighed, and you rested your hands on his shoulders, beginning the process of warming his body back to a normal temperature. “I should’ve been payin’ better attention, then we would’ve never ended up in this mess.” Not that I’m complaining too much.

The two of you sat together for a few minutes, letting Charles simply enjoy your body heat. “I don’t think either of us were expecting an O’Driscoll to come falling out of a tree.” You heard him say.

“It certainly wasn’t on my list of things to happen today,” you laughed, your hands moving down his shoulders to his biceps. Having him under your touch like this really put into perspective his sheer size. “And neither is this. Any of this. I’m sure you weren’t plannin’ on takin’ a bath in Lake Isabella today.”

“Can’t say I was. But, you-” Charles cut himself off, his eyes widening the tiniest bit. If you weren’t so close, you probably wouldn’t have noticed. You gave him a confused look, and he just shook his head. “It’s nothing. I almost said something foolish,” he tried to dismiss, embarrassment evident on his face.

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you say somethin’ foolish the entire time I’ve known you.” You tugged at one of his arms, bringing it between your bodies after he shifted his weight on to the other arm. You clasp his uninjured hand between yours, blowing hot air and trying your best to return some life back to the ice cubes that were his fingers. “You know I ain’t gonna tease you for what you say, right?”

“I know,” Charles sighed, but he didn’t elaborate further. You didn’t push, not wanting to wreck this moment between the two of you. You felt him flex his fingers between yours, a relieved noise leaving him as more feeling returned to them. Eventually, you let go of his hand, but it seemed like he didn’t quite know where to put it, hovering a few inches above your waist before returning back to the ground. “You can touch me, Charles.”

You held back a content noise when you finally felt him grasp your waist, his fingers resting on the waistband of your undergarments. Occasionally, his fingers would brush your bare skin, your undershirt having rid up when you had sat down, and you felt goosebumps erupt across your skin.

Moving to his injured hand, you eyed the now wrecked bandage, blood and water causing the material to practically dissolve. You tsked disapprovingly, and began to peel off the old wrapping, discarding them across the cabin. You were expecting to see the wound completely reopened, especially because of the punches he threw at the O’Driscoll, but were pleasantly surprised to find a pretty much healed injury. It was slightly irritated, sure, but it must’ve been healed for at least a day or two.

“And here I was scared that we’d have to chop off your hand,” you joked, flipping his arm over as you examined the now scar. “This has been healed for a day or two now. You’re probably only gonna have a light scar from this.” Realization dawned on you, and you chuckled. “Charles, you could’ve gone huntin’ on your own today.”

“I could’ve.” He didn’t even bother trying to deny it. “Still, I did want to do it with you, but I could’t just ask. I needed an excuse.”

“You never need an excuse, Charles. I’ll gladly go huntin’ with you, injured hand or not.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

You felt him squeeze your hip gently, a playful grin on his face. It had your stomach doing somersaults, and you tore your eyes away to begin warming up his other hand. It was strange, seeing him so carefree like this. It was a look you’d never really seen on him, but you rather enjoyed it. “Only hunting?” he asked.

“Maybe,” you teased, drawing out the syllables. “Whatcha have in mind?”

“Not quite sure yet. But it’ll just be us.”

“Like a date?” You joked, trying not to sound too hopeful.

“Sure. Like a date.”

A giddy smile cracked across your lips, and you gingerly kissed the back of Charles’ hand before letting it go, where it immediately joined his other by settling on your waist. Your ears were burning, a flustered blush growing across your body. Here you were, sitting on a naked Charles’ lap, only the thin material of your undergarments separating the two of you, but the thing that made you bashful was him asking you on a date.

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you rested your head on his shoulder. You felt him chuckle, the hands on your waist moving up your back, keeping your body pressed close to him. The digits were still a bit chilled, but you didn’t mind. The blanket around the two of you was barely hanging on at this point, and you tried your best to keep it around him. Like he did on the horse, you felt him bury his face in the crook where your neck and shoulders connected.

Although it was significantly less cold than the last time, you still shivered at the contact. You felt his lips brush against the skin, and you could barely feel the light kiss he pressed there, gone in an instant. So many thoughts and emotions were running through your mind at that moment. You mostly felt relieved, your feelings for the man no longer feeling so one-sided. Your mind was so loud, in fact, that you barely heard him mumble something against your skin. You realized that he was thanking you, and you responded with a confused noise.

“You saved my life today. Twice. I haven’t thanked you yet.”

“I wouldn’t’ve just left you, Charles. I couldn’t. I…” you trailed off, a confession ready to leave your lips. The bottle had cracked, its contents spilling out as you tried to damndest to keep it all contained. “If I remember correctly, you also saved me today. Nothin’ good would’ve happened if you weren’t there today.”

You felt him tense, an almost pained sound leaving him. “When I saw you like that… I don’t ever want to see that again.”

You moved back so that you could see him again, and you cupped the side of his face with your hand, relieved to find the skin significantly warmer than it was moments ago. “I’m alright. Thanks to you, I’m safe.”

He relaxed slightly, but his eyes were filled with so much sadness that it had you frowning. “I don’t think I’ve ever been that scared before,” he whispered, resting his own hand atop yours. “The best thing in my life, and I almost lost it today.” Both of you seemed surprised by his words, but you didn’t let him backtrack.

“But you didn’t. You are the one who got that man off me, and showed him the error of his ways.”

He chuckled at that, but then another frown adorned his lips. “I didn’t… unsettle you, right? I… I saw your eyes widen after you called me off him. You’re not-”

“Never. I know you’d never hurt me.”

Relieved, you felt him go fully lax under your touch. His whole body had returned to a normal temperature, you noted, the heat under the blanket beginning to become sweltering. With your thumb, you stroked his cheek, feeling the raised skin of the scar across his cheek. He let go of your hand, moving it back to the ground to keep the two of you propped up as you leaned forward. The duvet fell slightly, exposing his shoulder to the air, but he didn’t seem to mind.

Keeping your hand on his cheek, your lips brushed the shell of his ear. “Although, I do think you looked rather beautiful.”

He practically shuddered, a pleased smile on your mouth as you leaned back again. Keeping only a few inches between your faces, you watched as his eyes flicked down to your lips before returning up. “Yeah?” You don’t think you’ve ever heard his voice so low.

You nodded, the fingers on his cheek moving to brush a few strands away from his face. His eyes were dark, pupils blown out but not because of the low light. “I always think you look beautiful,” you murmured.

He hummed in response, and you felt the hand on your back creek up, resting at the nape of your neck. He didn’t pull you forward, he just held you. “Next to you, however, I imagine I look quite plain.”

“Oh, hush,” you chided while smiling.

“I’m serious.” You felt him play with the hair at your neck, fingers running lightly through the strands. “It’s distracting, how beautiful you are. Whenever I walk into a room and you’re in there, you’re the first thing I look at, and I can never bring myself to look away. At night at camp, you look so at ease, the fire illuminates your face in a way that makes you look ethereal. I can do nothing but watch you, too stunned to speak. You plague every waking thought, and you haunt my dreams. You’ve unknowingly burrowed yourself into my heart, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

You were at a loss for words, your mouth moving but no words actually came out. Choosing to ignore the way your heart celebrated, you let out an airy chuckle. “I think that’s the longest I’ve ever heard you talk.”

He laughed. “I can keep it short, if you’d like?”

“I didn’t mean that,” you scoffed. “What could possibly condense all that?”

Charles gave you a look, like he couldn’t believe you hadn’t caught on by now. A part of you knew what he was going to say, but you wouldn't believe it. You needed to hear it from his lips. The hand playing with your hair stilled, the only sound being the crackling fire behind you.

“I’m in love with you.”

He said it like it was the simplest thing ever, like it hadn’t just completely flipped your world upside down. He had taken your bottled up feelings and opened it himself. Taking your responding silence as a negative thing, you felt his hand fall slightly, a worried look crossing his face. You didn’t give him much time to worry, pulling him closer with the hand still cupping his face. Your foreheads connected, and your lips were almost brushing. “You mean it?”

“Of course.”

“Well… for how long?”

“How long have I been with the gang?”

Surprised, you laughed lightly, and he visibly looked confused. “So this entire time, you felt the same way?”

It took a second for him to process your words, a wide grin appearing when he did. “I guess so.” He paused for a moment, and you felt him take a deep breath. “You love me?” He asked, his voice small and uncertain.

You moved your face back an inch, giving you room to nod. “I do. For the same amount of time, too. I was too scared to say anythin’, I didn’t wanna ruin what we had. And I kinda thought I annoyed you to death,” you chuckled. “But if today reminded me of anythin’, it’s that this life is too unpredictable to have regrets.”

“Arthur gave you that lecture too?”

You rolled your eyes. Of course he didn't heed your warning about not playing matchmaker with you and Charles. But still, you might have to thank him later. “Despite what he claims, he’s a nosy bastard.”

He hummed in agreement, and a silence hung over the room, anticipation heavy in the air. With the lightest touch, you felt him bring you forward with the hand on the back of your head. “I wanna hear you say it,” you heard him ask.

“I love you, darlin’.” Both hands now cupped his cheeks, and you hovered your lips above his. “Kiss me?”

“Gladly.” You felt his hand move to cradle your head, pulling you in the final distance until your lips were colliding. There was only a hint of chill left on his skin, easily melting away against your warm mouth. His lips were soft, softer than you imagined, and you let out a pleased sigh. It was a surprisingly quick kiss, and you sucked in a breath when you felt him pull away, his eyes blown out.

He was also panting, and his fingers wove into your hair, like he was grounding himself. Moving forward, you tried to reconnect your lips, but he moved his head so that your lips collided with his cheek instead. A jolt of panic shot through your body, thinking you horribly misread the situation. “I want… I want this,” he reassured. “But I want to make sure you want this. That you want… me.”

You’d never met a man like Charles Smith, and you’re sure you’d never meet another like him. Never, ever had you heard of or met a man explicitly asking for consent like this, and it got you more excited than you thought it would. “I’ve wanted this for a while now,” you admitted, resting your touch on the junction where his shoulders and neck met. “I’ve dreamed of a moment like this more times than I can count. I want you, Charles. I need-”

In a complete switch up, he crashed his lips against yours, muffling your words. If the first kiss had been gentle and hesitant, this one was hungry and confident, lips eagerly moving against yours. He was practically devouring you, like he couldn’t get enough of you. With every small noise that left you, he seemed to grow more bold, and you felt the fingers in your hair tug slightly. It didn’t hurt, but it caused your lips to part. Within seconds his tongue swept into your mouth, eager to explore you.

The blanket had long since fallen off, bunched up on the ground surrounding the two of you. Pushing him lightly on his shoulders, you eased him on his back. Your hands planted on his chest when he made contact with the furs, your lips not separating for a moment. He was a pleasant temperature under your fingers, his skin surprisingly soft, just like his lips. You were straddling his waist now, your hands barely keeping you from laying your entire weight on the man.

He had let go of your head, his hands moving to your waist to keep you secure. His grip was strong, but not enough to leave a mark. A part of you wanted him to, but you didn’t say anything. If he wanted you like you wanted him, then there would be a next time.

Rocking your hips, you felt a growing hardness barely separated by your thin undergarments. You felt him groan when you did so, and he tugged at your bottom lip with his teeth. When he moved his head away to suck in some air, your hands snaked back up his neck, nearly covering his ears. You’d thought your attempts at warming him up were fruitful, but when you felt how cold his ears were, you made a concerned noise, your lust temporarily forgotten. “Your ears are freezing…”

He looked like he couldn’t care less, but then a mischievous smile crossed his face. “You gonna warm them up, then?”

“What do you think I’m tryin’ to do?” You giggled, and you made sure that your hands fully covered them. You had easy access to his lips, and you gave him a quick kiss.

“Not with your hands, my love.”

You smiled at the endearment, but his statement confused you. Cocking your head to the side, you moved your hands off his face, settling them back on his chest. “What-?”

You didn’t get to finish your question, the hands on your hips effortlessly pulling your up toward his face. Your knees now straddled the sides of his head, your thighs practically where your hands were, covering his ears. You looked down at him with wide eyes, a flush creeping up your neck at the implications. Surely he doesn't want that, right?

Charles let out a satisfied noise, and with his hands now on your thighs he eased you on to him. You let him, but you kept a few inches between his mouth and your body. He genuinely seemed upset by that, and you felt him press a quick kiss to the inside of your thigh, causing a shiver to run through your body.

“Please, let me taste you,” he pressed another kiss to the inside of your legs, this one closer to your aching center. If he moved any closer, he was bound to feel your wetness through the fabric. “I want you to fall apart on my face.”

You exhaled shakily. “You want to?” You asked, almost in disbelief. This man was unreal.

He nodded, the action causing his chin to brush against your center. “Let me make you feel good, my love.” When he pulled you down again, you didn’t keep any distance between the two of you. You felt him press a kiss to your clothed center, a smug grin on his face when he felt your arousal. He didn’t say anything, just pulling you down closer to his face until your legs were fully wrapped around his head, no space between the two of you.

You felt his tongue flick out, simply tasting you through the damp fabric. He did it again, and again, and his hands tightened on your thighs. He was indirect with his tongue, but each swipe had you letting out small moans. A mix of his saliva and your arousal was causing the fabric to become even more wet; they were most certainly going to be wrecked.

The small kitten-licks were nice, but you needed more. Charles knew this too, and you felt him work his fingers under the material of your undergarments, pulling them down your ass and thighs. It took some awkward maneuvering, but eventually the garment was off, being tossed somewhere to the side by you, leaving you in only your undershirt.

He wasted no time, pulling you back down onto his face with a growl. Parting you with a pass of his tongue, he let out a pleased noise, the vibrations shooting straight to your core. Charles was insatiable now, lapping and drinking you like you were the best goddamn meal he’s ever had. His eyes were hooded, drunk on you. When his broad strokes turned into concentrated flicks on your clit, you moaned loudly, your thighs turning vice-like around his head.

It spurred him on, working your clit with markman’s accuracy, bringing you closer and closer to your climax in record time. You heard him groan something under you, and you let out a breathy sigh when you realized he was groaning your name over and over again.

This entire time, you had kept your hands to yourself, but you were growing more and more desperate to touch him. Reaching down, your hands tangled in his hair, and then almost immediately releasing it like it burned you. For a second, you panicked, thinking yet again you crossed a line, which seemed to be a repeating event this evening. You knew his hair was an important part of his culture, and you would never forgive yourself if you did something to upset him.

Without even slowing down a beat, you felt him grab your hand, leading your back towards his head. He closed his eyes when he felt you weave your fingers through the locks, his hips bucking when you tugged slightly.

You were getting close now, and you felt yourself moving against his face in time with his tongue. “Charles,” you whined, and he hummed in response. “I’m- I’m gettin’ close, darlin’,”

As you neared your release, you heard the sound of skin-on-skin from behind you. Turning around, you saw Charles stroking himself, getting off to eating you out. “Oh my God… Charles…” you breathed out, barely able to tear your eyes away from the beautiful sight behind you.

His eyes were hazy with lust as he peered up at you from between your legs, and you could feel yourself begin to tip over the edge. Sighing out his name, you felt him grin. Before you could even process it, he sucked on your clit, pushing you over that edge as you came hard on his face. You were crying out his name, but your voice sounded distant to your ears, temporarily out of your body as you orgasmed. Charles kept his tongue moving as you came, drawing out every bit of pleasure from your body.

It took you a few moments to recover, and the first thing you were able to hear was the obscene noise leaving Charles’ mouth as he drank in your release. Secondly, you realized you had a death-grip on Charles’ hair, and you quickly let go, and you tried to apologize, but your words were jumbled. He continued to lap at you, but it quickly became too much, your body beginning to feel overstimulated. You rolled off of him, being mindful of the fireplace even in your post-orgasmic haze.

Glancing over at Charles, you found him already watching you, just like he would do in camp. With a soft smile, you scooted closer until you were pressed into his side. He gave you his arm to la on, and you felt him kiss the top of your head. It was silent between the two of you, simply taking the moment to catch your breaths and recover.

You couldn’t help looking down, though, having to stifle a gasp when you saw how big he actually was, having only gotten a glimpse of him early. He was going to feel good, but you knew you would be sore for a few days after. Not that you cared.

Looking back up at him, you let your fingers trail up his chest, resting right above his heart. It was beating erratically, just like yours, and you heard him let out a noise when your fingers “accidently” brushed over his nipple. You heard him whine out your name, and you slowly sat up. You were able to see him clearer now, and he looked like a mess. His face was covered in your slick, glistening in the firelight, and his hair was all tousled from your fingers. But the best part was the pure bliss on his features.

It was almost comical, the way his eyes snapped open when you pulled off your shirt, exposing your chest to him. “You’ve got somethin’ on your face,” you tried to joke, but your voice was quite hoarse. You tossed your shirt at him, giving him something to wipe his mouth with. He merely set it to the side, unbothered with the mess. Propping himself up with an arm, he offered you his free hand, pulling you forward when you took it in yours.

You nearly fell right on top of him, your muscles pure jelly. Laughing, you were just able to get upright before he was kissing you. It was weird, tasting yourself on him, but you found you didn’t mind. You didn’t keep your lips on his for too long, moving down his jaw, then down his neck. You weren’t straddling his hips, so the positioning was a tad bit uncomfortable, but you didn’t care.

Moving down further, you trailed kissed across his collarbones, then down his sternum, his breathing growing uneven as you went lower and lower. A hand now rested on the back of your head as you continued downward, reaching a patch of hair that started at his belly button. It surprised you, the rest of his body being relatively hairless, but you weren't complaining. In fact, you were imagining seeing it peek out from under his shirt as he stretched, his clothing riding up with his arms. Even though it was relatively innocent in the light of everything else the two of you were doing, it had you pressing your thighs together, trying to relieve the returning ache between them.

Following the happy trail, you ran your fingers through the hair as you adjusted closer to his member. His was achingly hard at this point, and his breathing stilled when you ghost your lips over the tip. Leaning over him, you flicked your tongue out, licking up the bead of precum. The hand and your head tightened into a ball, and you could tell he was fighting every urge to buck himself down your throat. Next time, you thought.

Moving down further so that you sat between his legs, you spit into your hand before you grasped him. He was velvety soft as you slowly began to stroke him, a mix of your name and a moan leaving his lips as you did so. With heavy eyes and part lips, he watched you pleasure him. “You feel so good in my hand,” you murmured, “butI think you’ll feel even better in me, no?”

His response was slightly incoherent, but you could tell he was agreeing with you. “In a second, darlin’. I wanna taste you, too.”

“You don’t need to do that.” Charles found his voice again, although it sounded very strained.

“But I want to. Don’t make me beg for it.” You weren’t really intended to suggest anything, but the look on Charles’ face at your comment had you grinning. “Unless you want me to?”

“I-” he was stunned, but you could tell he was imagining it, and liking it.

“Please, darlin’, let me suck your cock,” you fluttered your lashes at him. “I bet you taste so good… just let me taste you, please. I need it so bad, darlin’. I need your cock-”

“Fuck, you’re gonna be the death of me.” Charles cursed, which was more arousing than you thought it would be. “Yeah, go ahead, my love.”

Pressing one last kiss to the tip, you flattened your tongue and ran it up his length, and you heard him moan. You did it a few times, receiving a similar reaction each time. Eventually, you slowly took the tip of him into your mouth, swirling your tongue around while doing so. Taking more and more of him into your mouth, you were only able to take him halfway before he was pressing against the back of your throat, and you relaxed as best you could, not wanting to trigger your gag reflex.

Taking the rest of him in your hand, you began to bob your head up and down. Hollowing your cheeks until you reached the tip of him, you then ran your tongue across the slit, before moving back down his length, keeping your tongue flat. You repeated this action for a while, falling into an easy rhythm. You felt him buck up a few times, but other than that he kept his hips relatively still, letting you have your way with him. His hand didn’t push you further down him, he just simply held you, moving back the hairs that tried to fall in your face.

You heard him moan out your name, and you groaned. “You feel so good, my love,” he praised. His words turned into a surprised moan, whe, with your free hand, started moving slowly up his thigh, moving inward until you brushed against his balls. He nearly jumped with the contact, causing his cock to go further down your throat than you'd like, causing you to rear back coughing.

Immediately, he was apologizing. His hand was now on your cheek, wiping away the spit around your mouth as you recovered. “Are you alright?” He asked, and you nodded, not trusting your voice at that second. You could tell that he still felt bad, and you pressed a kiss to the inside of his wrist.

“I’m alright,” you managed to get out, and you cleared your throat some more. “Just caught me off guard, that’s all.”

“So did you, touching me like that” he teased, his earlier concerns dissipating when he saw that you truly were okay. “I wasn’t gonna last long even before you did that.” Pulling you up to him, he kissed you, and you finally straddled his waist, his cock resting between your bodies.

You weren’t given much time to savor his lips before your world was quite literally turning as he flipped you on to your back. The furs nestled nicely against your skin, and you locked your legs around Charles’ waist, grinding yourself against his member. His head fell against your chest, and you felt him brush feather-light kisses across your skin, much like you did. But a new eagerness had overtaken you, and you grinded again against him, and you felt him chuckle. “Patience, my love.”

“I’ve waited long enough, Charles. I need you in me.”

“You think you’re ready for me?” If those words came out of any other man, you would’ve laughed at the arrogance those words held. But you knew it came out of a place of genuine concern for your wellbeing, scared of hurting you. He was large, and you knew that it was probably going to hurt when he entered you, but your lust fueled brain did not care. You need him in you now, consequences be damned.

“Please,” you whispered, and he adjusted so that his face was level with yours.

“Alright, but if at any point-”

Kissing him quickly, you smiled at him, brushing back a long strand of hair that fell in his face. “I will. I trust you. Now,” you kissed him again, “fuck me.”

He didn’t respond, pressing a kiss against the tip of your nose before you felt him press into you. He kept his eyes on your face, gauging your reaction as he slowly entered you. The initial breach was always the worst part, and you couldn’t help the slight grimace that crossed your features as he breached your entrance. He halted, but you urged him further by pressing your heels into his back.

The stretch was unlike anything else you’d ever felt, satiating a need you didn’t know you had. Tangling your hands in his hair, you pulled your face against yours, resting your foreheads together. “God, you feel so good,” you panted as he pressed himself deeper into you. You were certain that he was going to ruin you for any other man.

Hearing him chuckle made you realize you said that last part aloud. “After this, you’re stuck with me, my love.”

Because you couldn’t keep your mouth shut, and you were curious to see how deep his possessive side went, you pushed further. “Am I now?” Yes.

For a second, it seemed like Charles couldn’t tell that you were teasing, but when he saw the playful glint in your eye he played along. “Do you think anyone else could make you feel like this?”

He was nearly fully sheathed in you, and you fought the urge to just pull him the rest of the way into you “I dunno. If I remember right, I asked you to fuck me. It sure don’t feel like you’re doin’ that.”

Finally, he was fully in you, your hips flushed together. You both let out content moans, and Charles gave you a moment to adjust. “You want me to fuck you?” He confirmed, and the words sounded even filthier coming from his mouth.

“If you don’t, I’ll find someone who will.”

Letting out something akin to a growl, he pulled out of you quickly, leaving only the tip in before he was slamming back into you, hands gripping your hips tightly. He set a brutal pace, and your head rolled back, your moans and cries filling the air. With the way your head was, it caused your back to arch, meaning your breasts were right in his face. With zero hesitation, he took one into his mouth, sucking and toying with the nipple in his mouth. Releasing it, he switched to the other one, making sure to give both apt attention.

Tugging at his hair, you brought his attention upwards. Smashing your lips against his, your kiss was open-mouth and messy, more tongue and teeth than anything. His hips were snapping against yours, incessant as he pounded into you.

“Yes! Charles,” you wailed, tearing your lips away from his to do so. He kept his lips busy, nipping and kissing the skin at your jaw and neck. A particularly hard bite had you gasping, and you felt him smirk against your skin. Your senses were completely overwhelmed in the best way; all that you could register was him, the way he felt, the way he tasted, the way he looked.

He leaned over you now, broad arms caging your head in. His dark hair fell in waves around him, blocking out any other visual in the room. All you could do was look at him, and he was a sight for sore eyes. Color had long since returned to his cheeks, the skin there darkening with exertion. His eyes were locked on to you, dancing around your face and chest like he couldn’t quite figure out what he wanted to look at. His plush lips were parted, soft gasps of air leaving him with each thrust.

Another snap of his hips had you grasping at his back and shoulders, pleasuring washing over you as another orgasm began to build up. Your nails dug into his skin, no doubt leaving marks, but it didn’t seem to deter him. In fact, he let out a low moan, and it had your cunt clenching around his cock.

Babbling his name, your nails ran down his back, leaving in its wake angry red lines. “You feel so good… like you were made for me.”

“My love…” he sighed, and one of the hands at the side of your head cupped your face, bringing you right to his lips. His length was reaching places in you that you didn’t know existed, filling you deep and hard, just like you wanted. You were going to become addicted to him.

“I’m so close, Charles…” Releasing one of his shoulders, you snaked your hand between your bodies, moving to start touching yourself. You weren’t expecting him to quickly grasp your wrist, bringing it out of the way and replacing your hand with his much larger one. He began to rub at your clit, slow circular movements that juxtaposed the fast in-and-out of his cock. His ministrations had you seeing stars, and you felt yourself reaching completion again that night.

“Charles, I-”

“I know. Let me feel you fall apart.” He pressed a quick kiss to your lips.

His slow movements turned rapid, groaning when he felt you clench around him. With a cry of his name, you came, pleasure rolling over you in waves. This one was stronger than the first, feeling like every nerve in your body had been set aflame. Your eyes rolled back, the world temporarily turning dark as your eyelids shut. He kept his eyes on you the entire time, a reverent look in his gaze. With the way your walls were fluttering around him, and the quickened pace of his hips, you knew that he wasn’t going to last much longer either.

His arms went back around your head, continuing to move as he chased his own release. You heard him gasp out, quickly pulling out of you, and you let out a discontent noise as he no longer filled you. He stroked himself a few times, hand moving fervently up and down his length. If you weren’t so fucked out of your mind, you would’ve had taken him in your hand yourself, wanting to feel him as well. Moaning your name, you watched as he came, his release spilling over your stomach. His hips canted forward a few times as he worked through the aftershocks of his orgasm.

You loosened your legs that were wrapped around his waist, and silence hung over the two of you as you both processed what just happened. A small laugh left you, breaking the trance, and you saw him smile back at you, mirroring his laughter with his own. You watched him grab the blanket that was still bundled up on the floor, and he tore off a section of it, the sound of fabric ripping startling you slightly.

Wiping his release from your skin, he tossed the soiled cloth to some corner of the room. It’s not like this was your place, anyways. Opening your arms, you invited him to lay with you, and he gladly accepted. He was careful to keep his full weight off of you, but he still lay partially on top of you, his head resting on your chest. It was comforting, and you felt yourself begin to grow a bit sleepy. “Are you warm yet?” You teased, running your fingers soothingly through his hair, and you felt his chest rumble with laughter.

“I think so,” he responded, bringing the blanket around your bodies. The fire was starting to die down, but neither of you moved to add fuel to it. He murmured something, and you gave an inquisitive sound. “I love you,” he repeated, his brown eyes filled with emotion as he stared up at you.

“I love you, too.”

He opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but he quickly shut it. “What is it?” You asked, and he sighed, his warm breath tickling you.

“Does that mean you’ll stay?”

In all honesty, you had completely forgotten about your earlier conversation. The vulnerability in his voice had your eyes watering, and it didn’t take much thinking to reach your answer. Sure, you were scared for the future of the gang, and you were scared that with each passing day you’d find yourself closer and closer to finding your end at a rope or a barrel, but none of those fears mattered, not anymore. Not when you finally had all that you wanted in your arms. And who knows, maybe you’d end up leaving in time, but you knew you wouldn’t be leaving alone.

“Yeah, I’ll stay. Besides, you still owe me a date.”

His responding smile solidified that you had made the right decision. Whatever the future held, you knew it would be easier with Charles by your side.

#charles smith #charles smith rdr2 #rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #charles smith x reader

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topgun-imagines · 1 year

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Nothing to Lose

Requested: no

Summary: The real reason behind why Jake Seresin’s flying is so reckless.

Word count: 2.1k

Warnings: Mentions of car crashes, death, child loss.

Note: I apologize in advance.

Parings: Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x Wife!reader

It was amazing how fast rumors could spread at Top Gun. People were constantly gossiping about who did what, who had a drink with who. A common one was who slept with who. That one seemed to be the topic of right now. Many pilots and WSO’s could be found in the Hard Deck discussing this particular topic, eyes darting around the room as they watched people leave. But, as usual, the pilots and WSO’s of Top Gun ran out of rumors to spread. When they were especially bored, they would turn to people’s flying, critiquing their skill and ability until they inevitably gave up on that too. There was still one incredible rumor floating around Top Gun. It had yet to be answered but there seemed to be new theories every day.

Why was Jake Seresin’s flying so reckless?

The answer was simple. While no one knew it, everyone speculated. He had a mission go sideways overseas, he was overly cocky, he was flying against the ghost of the man his father wanted him to be; the ideas seemed to get crazier with every passing day. Regardless of how many theories there were, no one would ever get it right. Jake kept that secret closely guarded. No one else knew about it. And if Jake had it his way, no one would ever find out.

He was sitting at the bar, listening to people gossip all around him. The pilot had been called to Top gun a few weeks ago. He practically jumped at the chance to escape his old town. Austin was full of too many bad memories. Jake had never been close to anyone, and coming to Top Gun as the only member of his squadron seemed to prove that to him.

Just as he was about to pay his tab, a man approached him. “Hangman,” The man started, staring down at the blond with a small smirk. “I’m Coyote. Nice to officially meet you,” Jake bit his tongue before forcing a smile. He had seen the man in class the day before; he seemed like the kind of man that was easy to make friends with. Which was exactly what Jake didn’t need right now. Jake slid his card over to Penny. He couldn’t wait to get back to his quarters. “Me and my friend have a little wager,” The taller man nodded back toward a black-haired woman that was sitting by the dart board. Jake raised a single eyebrow, not really caring where this conversation was going. “She says that you have a girlfriend. I said no way in hell.” The blond pilot sucked in a sharp breath.

Without responding to the man, Jake plucked his card out of Penny’s hand and turned around. He left the bar, leaving the man standing behind him. “What the hell man?” Coyote called out. With a shake of his head, he made his way back to the table. He wasn’t going to let some blond pilot ruin his night with Natasha.

The truck was silent as Jake drove to his quarters. He had shut off the radio the second he climbed into the beat-up truck. The window was rolled down, fresh air streaming into the truck as he sped down the highway. Honestly, he was shocked at the fact that the man’s statement had affected him as much as it did. Jake spent the rest of the ride with his head in the clouds, mind drifting back to a past that he thought he had left behind.

He pulled into the driveway of his temporary housing. To him, it was far from a home. The headlight flashed against dark windows, briefly displaying the emptiness inside of the house. Jake killed the engine. He sat in the truck for a few minutes, willing himself to forget everything that had just rushed back to the surface. Everything that he had tried so hard to push down. With a final shaky breath, he hopped out of the car and headed into the house.

Flicking the lights on, he slipped out of his shoes. The pilot moved through the house slowly, eventually winding up in the bathroom. The reflection that stared back at him was blank, barely showing any hint of emotion whatsoever. He pulled his T-shirt over his head quickly, discarding it into the growing pile of dirty laundry by the door. When his eyes landed on his dog tags his breath hitched. The rings that dangled from it taunted him, mocked him for why they were hanging there. His eyes drifted down to his own ring finger, finding the shiny gold band glinting back at him.

Jake cleared his throat and finished getting ready. He brushed his teeth quickly, attempting to ignore everything that he was feeling. Memories attached to those rings couldn’t help but rush to the surface. When he was done Jake climbed into bed and let his eyes slip shut, willing his mind to allow him one night of peaceful sleep. But after today’s events, he knew that that was unlikely.

Jake awoke with a start. For almost a year now his dreams had been plagued with memories from that day. He checked the time. 5am. That was longer than he usually lasted. Even though he hadn’t been there to witness it, the horrid image from the hospital was enough to fill his mind with pictures of what could have happened. With a sigh, the blond hopped out of bed. He flicked on the bedside lamp as he began to get ready for his day.

First, he made a coffee for himself. It had the perfect amount of creamer. Just how you used to make it. Then he practically chugged the drink, inhaling sharply as pictures of her flooded his mind. He pulled a random T-shirt over his head before slipping on his leggings. A quick run by the beach should do him some good. He didn’t bother locking the house as he exited. It’s not like there was much inside that he valued anyways.

The air was crisp as he began his run. At this time of the morning the sun was barely above the horizon, only a small sliver of light peaking up over the sea. The house that he had been given was right on the beach. Wind that blew in from the sea helped clear his head. He kept running, mind moving faster than he ever thought was possible. You were the light of his life. Until one faithful day that was all taken from him. Jake ran faster. Maybe if he focused on the pounding of his heart the pain would disappear.

Before he even realized it he was back in front of his door. The pilot heaved a sigh and headed inside. The house was still dark when he slipped into the shower. After a quick rinse he was pulling on his service khakis and hopping in the truck. The drive to base was around 20 minutes. Jake kept the radio off as he drove. When he finally pulled into the parking lot the sun had just begun to rise above the horizon. There was only one other car in the student section.

Jake walked through the long hallways before stepping into the classroom they were scheduled to be in today. Inside, he found the man and woman from the night before sitting next to each other. They were laughing quietly together, the woman’s hand resting on his arm. The second he walked into the room the pair quieted down. When Jake took his seat near the back of the room the man, Coyote, if he remembered correctly, approached him and slid into the chair next to him. He paid the man no mind, opening his journal and beginning to take down a few notes that he missed from the day before. “Hangman,” Coyote started, clearing his throat awkwardly. “Nice to see you again.” The blond pilot simply scoffed quietly.

This man seemed to love getting on Jake’s nerves. “What do you want?” Jake didn’t bother looking up at him. When the man beside him didn’t respond Jake’s eyes cut up to him. He raised a single eyebrow Jake sighed and leaned back in the chair. “Can I help you with something?” That seemed to snap the man out of his daydream. Jake’s breath caught when he saw that the man’s eyes were trained on his wedding band.

“About last night,” Jake could have punched his lights out over that sentence alone. Coyote could sense the man’s discomfort. “Look, I’m sorry,” He started. Jake’s eyebrows furrowed. He watched as the woman at the front of the classroom stood up from her seat. Checking the clock out of the corner of his eye he saw that they had around 30 minutes before class started. Why would she be leaving now? Before she left the room she leaned down next to Coyote and whispered something in his ear. He responded with a soft smile. He turned back to Jake before continuing. “I really didn’t mean to offend you or anything.”

Jake watched him curiously. “It’s fine,” he dismissed. When the man didn’t move from his spot Jake came to realize something. Coyote wasn’t just apologizing, he was waiting for Jake to answer his question from last night. Instead of answering directly, he responded with one of his own. “How much did you put on this bet?” He could see Coyote’s mouth drop from the corner of his eye.

He stuttered slightly. Eventually, he cleared his throat and responded. There was a small smirk on his face as he spoke. “A significant sum.” Jake could hear the confidence oozing from his voice.

Nodding his head, Jake finished what he was writing before shutting his notebook. “You lost,” His voice was sharp and clipped. Coyote opened his mouth as if he was going to apologize when Jake cut him off. “You wanna know the truth?” He honestly didn’t know why he was going to tell this complete stranger one of his deepest secrets but something in his gut told him he could trust him. Coyote couldn’t help but nod softly. “I had a wife, and a child. And one day, just because some truck driver couldn’t keep his hands off his phone for 30 seconds I lost both of them.” Coyote instantly regretted ever asking in the first place. It was apparent to him now more than ever that this was not his place.

“She was on her way to the hospital,” Jake continued. “I was out of town, running a few errands and I was supposed to meet her there,” Jake’s eyes became watery. This was the first time that he had opened up about what happened to you. “She was going to have our baby,” A single tear trailed down his cheek. Jake wiped it away quickly. The man beside him continued to listen in silence. He could tell that Jake needed someone to talk to. “The truck came out of nowhere. It was speeding through the intersection and didn’t stop in time,” The blond's eyes drifted down to his wedding band. “I never got to see her or our baby again.”

Coyote could tell that Jake was finished with his story. All the teasing that he and Nat had been doing over the past few days suddenly made him want to vomit. He had made a game of a man’s personal life. He had made a game out of a man’s wife and child that had died in a horrible accident. Who does that? “I’m so sorry, man,” His voice was gentle, trying to soothe and not piss off the aviator in front of him. “I didn’t know.” Jake just nodded in response, wiping the remaining tears from his lashes.

That was the beginning of a beautiful friendship. The pair had agreed to start over, Coyote deciding that maybe Jake wasn’t as bad as he seemed. Eventually Jake opened up more to Coyote, filling him in on personal details that no one else knew about him.

And now Coyote knew why Jake’s flying was so reckless. It wasn’t because he was cocky, or because he had a mission go sideways. It wasn’t even because he was flying against someone he would never be. Finally, someone had the real answer to the age-old rumour. And it wasn’t nearly close to anything that had been speculated. People would still gossip, but for now only one person knew the truth. The reason that Jake Seresin flew so recklessly, was because he had no reason not to. It was because, for nearly a year now, Jake Seresin had nothing to lose.

a/n: Thank you for reading! Requests are open.

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dreamescapeswriting · 2 years

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BTS Reaction Mafia || You’re Pregnant And Disappear On Him

⤜Copyright: © DreamEscapesWriting - August 2022

⤜MASTERLIST

An: I got a little carried away with a few of them ahh sorry!

SEOKJIN: 1.7K

Jin shook his head at you as he continued to walk around his home office in search of everything he was going to need for the night. You'd started fighting with one another the second you found out that he was going to be gone for the night.

"You don't even see a problem with it do you?" You yelled as you stared at your husband who was, once again, getting ready to leave you alone here all night long. Locked up inside of the safehouse as if you were some kind of fairytale princess that needed to be kept away from everything else in the world. Ever since you'd gotten here you'd not been outside unless it was for the baby and even then you were taken to the car door, escorted into the hospital and brought straight back here. You couldn't remember the last time you'd been able to go outside and stretch your legs for longer than two minutes. Even the balconies were off limits to you while you were here.

"No, I don't. I see me, protecting the love of my life from everything bad outside," You rolled your eyes at the statement. It was the same one he had used when he first bought you here. That was under the promise that nothing would be different and you would still have all of your freedom but all of that was a lie. Jin had practically locked you inside and threw away the key, even changing all of the combinations on the doors that lead to the outside.

"You're being insane! I just want to go out for a little while, god. Why is that so hard? Just a small walk around the Han River, what is so bad about that?" You threw your hands up in defeat and Jin turned to stare at you. He couldn't believe that you weren't able to see the possible dangers that would come along if you were seen outside in your state right now. Everyone knew of your pregnancy and it would be idiotic to let you out of the house while you were practically a walking and talking target.

"You could get kidnapped, you could get stabbed or someone could easily take you and keep you until you deliver my baby," He stated as he stared down at the bump, you looked as though you were about ready to pop which worried Jin even more. What if you go out and you go into labour while you're walking around the streets? No one but your guard would be with you and you'd be in trouble.

"Our baby! She's ours!" You grumbled, running your hands over the bump. You couldn't stand it when he referred to your baby as just "his" as if he was the only one who had a hand in creating the little bundle that was growing inside of you.

"You don't know it's a girl," He grumbled bitterly as you rolled your eyes. Not only had he called your child an "it" he'd been holding out hopes that it was going to be a boy. It wouldn't have bothered you that much but you knew that he only wanted a boy so he could take over Jin's empire without hassle. God forbid if a woman became the leader of his entire life's work.

"Will you stop calling our baby "it"? Don't you feel any kind of attachment to them? Or was it just another way to get higher up in the mafia life?!" It was a low blow and you knew that but right now you didn't care right now you were laying out all your feelings onto the table. It felt as though Jin had used you to get married and have an heir to his throne only to leave you when got exactly what he wanted from you. Everyone knew that the top dog had to have someone to pass his lifework down to and you weren't dumb. Your marriage had been an arrangement at first until the two of you truly fell in love with one another.

"You didn't just say that?" He grumbled, his voice sounded hurt but you stood your ground. It was about time he heard how he was making you feel.

"I did. Because that's what it feels like! You're never here! You're always out of the house, you miss appointments and I can't remember the last time you spoke to our child," Jin shook his head as he began to walk out of the office, you were hot on his trail following him into the main entrance of your home.

"Because it's a bump! There's no child to talk to yet," He harshly said as he turned to look at your guard. The man was around 6'3 and standing by the door to make sure you didn't try and run as soon as Jin left.

"But it doesn't mean they can't hear you," You were hurt by the whole thing. From everything, you'd read about other people and their babies the father had always been so attentive and caring toward the mother and bump. You wanted that with Jin, you knew he wasn't the big and scary man he made himself out to be since he'd always been soft with you.

"You're being ridicilous," Jin said as he shook his head at you, no longer wanting to have this discussion, he was going to be late.

"I'm being ridiculous?! I haven't spent a night with my husband in three months. You're never here!" You screamed out as he turned his back on you and began to put his keys into the door, unlocking it as you stared at the back of his head. Tears rushed to your eyes as you realised he was just going to walk out even after you expressed you didn't want him to.

"So you're just going to walk away?"

"There's nothing to talk about and I have to get to work." He murmured as he got the door unlocked and turned to look at you, his heart broke seeing you crying but he wasn't going to back down. There was no way he was going to risk you going outside and getting hurt and all of this overtime was for you. If he could get everything he needed to do done and out of the way he could spend more time with you when the baby came.

"Nothing to talk about? So you don't want to talk about how you haven't been to a single scan since the first one?" You questioned, folding your hands over your chest as he shook his head,

"No."

"Or that your wife feels as though you don't love her anymore all because she got pregnant?" The statement hit him harder than he was expecting it to do but all he did was walk out of the door, slamming it shut with brute force behind him.

[X]

When he got home he expected to find you in bed but you weren't there, then he frantically checked every other room in the house and began to yell for all of his men to find you. He'd come back a few hours later after leaving the house, he'd bought flowers and all of your favourite snacks as a form of apology. He'd not been able to concentrate on anything at the office and all he wanted was to come back to you but when he got home you were gone. Completely gone. Your guard was out cold on the sofa and the bedroom was empty, including every other room inside of the safehouse.

"This wouldn't have happened if you hadn't fallen asleep!" Jin screamed as he walked around the Han River, all of his men covering every inch of it and walking in different directions in the hopes of finding you.

"Sir,"

"No. You're an imbecile! How could you let a pregnant woman drug you?!" He screamed as he thought about the sleeping tablets he'd found inside the kitchen. It was rather smart of you but Jin wasn't going to admit that,

"If even so much as a hair is hurt on her I'll end you. I will torture you with torture that hasn't even been invented yet," He warned before turning to look around for you, calling your name out over and over again.

"We found her," One of his men panted, pointing over to a bench that was overlooking the river. They'd all tried to get you to leave but it wasn't going to happen any time soon when you didn't want to go anywhere.

"I told you not to go out," Jin stated as he came and sat down beside you, you didn't even turn your head to look at him and it worried him. It wasn't like you to be this calm and he couldn't stand it.

"I needed fresh air," You mumbled, shivering a little as you stared down at the water. It was a beautiful night and you were glad you'd snuck out when you did. It'd been too long since you got to sit under the stars,

"Do you have any idea how worried I've been?" Jin quizzed as he slipped off his blazer and put it over your shoulders, staring at you as you didn't even react to him touching you.

"Don't worry. Your baby is fine." You were being frank with him and he couldn't stand it, he should have just stayed home and taken a walk with you then none of this would be happening.

"I was worried about the both of you," He told you, reaching his hand out and squeezing yours but you just move your hand away from him making him flinch.

"Don't lie. We both know you're only worried something might happen to your baby and you'll not have anyone to pass it down to." You stared at the water and Jin stood up and blocked your view.

"I came home to take you out, to go for a walk before the two of us would go home and watch sappy movies all night long," Your heart clenched as you stared up at Jin, it was obvious now that he'd been crying and you whimpered a little.

"I freaked out when I saw you were gone...Please...Don't take my protectiveness as not caring. I've been working overtime in hopes of being able to spend more time with you when the baby comes,"

"Jin..." Your voice trembled as you got up from the bench and stood in front of him, placing your hand on his chest as he looked down at you with tear-filled eyes.

"I assure you that I would never do something if I didn't think it was for the best," You smiled weakly at the statement before kissing his lips softly.

"Take me home," You begged as he nodded his head and took your hand in his, all of his men walking behind you and making sure you weren't being followed.

"Nice job on the sleeping tablets," Jin whispered as you finally made your way back into the safehouse. A smirk grew on your lips as you stared up at him,

"I'm a genius, are you ready for sappy movies?" You quizzed as you took your husband's hand in yours and began to pull him toward the bedroom.

YOONGI:1.3K

The doctor's office was cold with your bump exposed the way it was but you were just sitting on the bed while the nurse watched you nervously. Your guard was manned outside of the door to make sure no one would come in while you were in a vulnerable spot.

"You said you would be here," You grumbled down the phone to Yoongi who hadn't bothered to show up for your final baby scan. You were inside the doctor's office sitting on the bed refusing to let her touch you until your husband was here. But as it turned out he was going to be a no show,

"I know but I'm running late and I have a shipment to take care of because Jimin-"

"I don't want to hear your excuses. I wanted you here." It sounded childish but this was your child, the child that you and Yoongi had made together and he was treating this as if it was all some kind of joke to him.

"Yn, you know what this life is like." Yoongi sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose as he overlooked everything that was on the desk in front of him. He would have killed to be with you right now but some things just couldn't be helped, especially when he had dumb workers who weren't doing what they were supposed to be,

"I don't care. This is our child and you're supposed to be a part of all of this," You mumbled bitterly, glancing at the nurse who was doing everything she could to avoid looking in your direction. All of the hospital staff were under strict obligations not to mess with you or Yoongi and you knew that he'd gotten the best of the best inside of the hospital to take care of you.

"Babe," Yoongi sighed, getting up from his chair and going to grab his jacket. If it meant that much to you he was just going to put someone else in charge of the order and get there as quickly as possible.

"Don't babe me," You snapped, it was the same passive-aggressive tone he would use whenever he wanted to be condescending to you and you couldn't stand it. You'd done everything he'd told you to since getting pregnant.

You cut down on what food he wanted, you didn't go out as much because you knew you were a walking target and not to mention you'd even agreed to private health care when you were perfectly fine with your original health care.

"I'll be there as soon as I can. I don't think I'll make it to the scan though," He stated as he looked down at his watch. The scan should have started five minutes ago but you'd refused to until you knew whether or not he was coming.

"Whatever." You grumbled before hanging up and staring at the nurse, waiting for her to begin the scan.

"Miss Yln, I don't think Mr Min would want you to do this." Your personal guard said as you walked straight past the car that you were supposed to be climbing inside of. Yoongi still hadn't shown up and you'd waited for well over an hour now, you refused to wait inside of a hospital any longer than you had done already.

"Mr Min can take it up with someone who cares," You mumbled as you slammed the door shut and continued to walk along the streets. Your guard stared at you anxiously as he didn't know whether to follow you or wait for Yoongi to drop by.

"You can come with me if you're worried," You smirked as the guard began to follow along with you.

[X]

"Where have you been?!" Yoongi yelled as you suddenly walked into the house, staring at him and all of the police that was inside your living room.

"I went shopping," You said as if it was the most casual thing in the world, dismissing the policemen as you walked right past them and stood in front of Yoongi who looked as though he'd seen a ghost.

"I got some cute baby onesies and then we went and got some toys," You told him with a giant smile, holding up all of the bags you were carrying - which weren't many since Hoseok told you he would carry everything for you.

"We?"

"Me and Hobi," You said as you pointed at the struggling guard, he was attempting to bring in all of the heavy boxes. Everything you had purchased was in his hands, it had taken multiple trips to get everything into the house.

"You went out?"

"Yeah, I knew we were in need of some toys and you weren't going to take me anytime soon," Yoongi sighed as he told the police to leave and sent most of his men with Hobi upstairs to the nursery to drop off everything you bought.

"Was it payback for me missing the appointment?" Yoongi sighed as he realised you had done this all out of retaliation. When he showed up at the hospital he completely freaked out about you not being there. He saw the car and instantly thought that something awful had happened to you. Then when Hoseok stopped answering his messages Yoongi felt so sick he called every police department in the district, there was no way he was going to let something happen to you.

"Hmm?" You asked, turning to look at him and feeling a pang of guilt as you saw the state of your husband. His hair was all over the place and it looked as though he had been crying for a while now. You never would have done it if you thought he was going to cry, you just needed to get out for a while and enjoy being out of the house.

"Making me sick with worry, getting Hoseok to ignore direct orders and ignoring all of my calls. Was it payback?" His voice cracked as he moved closer to you, taking your hands in his and giving them a tight squeeze as you bit down on your lip. Maybe you had gone a little overboard with making Hoseok promise not to text Yoongi, you just hoped he wouldn't get into trouble for something you had ordered him to do.

"Maybe," You admitted shyly and he let out a small chuckle, even if you had annoyed him by running away he still found you incredibly adorable with the way you were acting.

"Maybe?"

"Yeah, I was mad at you and I didn't want to come home right away," You licked your lips slowly and turned to look up at your husband. It was wrong and you knew that and it was petty but all you wanted was to have your husband by your side during a pregnancy scan. What was so hard about that?

"Yn, you know the dangers, something terrible could have happened to you." He looked at you and you smiled a little, looking down at the small onesie in your hand. It had all been worth it to you since you managed to get everything you wanted for the baby.

"I know but we needed to get stuff too..." You looked at him and he smiled down at you shaking his head slowly as he thought about it. If you'd asked he would have taken you in a heartbeat,

"I would have taken you, all you had to do was ask."

"Really?" Your eyes lit up and he felt bad that you hadn't thought about asking him in fear of him saying no.

"Yes, you know I can't say no to you." He chuckled and you let out a small giggle at the thought of it. It was true, you could still remember asking him for something embarrassing in front of all of his men and he did it without even thinking.

"Hmm it is a huge weakness of yours," You smirked as he pulled you close to him, smiling down at you as you let out a whine at the feeling of being moved. You were completely tired and didn't want to move for the foreseeable future.

"Which you happily exploit," He teased before you kissed him softly, slowly moving off the sofa to go and show off everything you had gotten for the baby.

HOSEOK:1.2K

The longer you went on about all of this the more Hoseok wanted to go to work, which was something he'd been dodging for the last month. With you being so close to your birth date Hoseok wanted to spend as much time with you at home as possible in case you went into labour but the longer he sat here the more he regretted that. Maybe he should have gone to work and got one of his men to message him when the moment was coming. At least that way he would have been able to avoid all of this happening.

"I was not looking at her," Hoseok grumbled as he followed you through the house and into the living room of your luxury home. The two of you had just gotten home from having some lunch outside when you decided to pick a fight on the way home. You claimed that Hoseok had been checking out the waitress that had been serving you but he really wasn't. In fact, the whole time at lunch he was on edge expecting someone to come over and spark a conversation with him when all he wanted was to be alone with you. It had been so long since the two of you actually had some time alone together and he had very much been looking forward to it.

"Sure, just like you didn't stare at her ass," You grumbled while taking off your shoes and sighing out at the comfort you got about not having to wear them. Pregnancy was no joke and you were pooped just from walking from the car into the house.

"I wasn't. In case you haven't noticed, I only have eyes for one woman in my life and she is standing right in front of me," Hoseok smiled at you as he pointed to the ring he had on his finger but you still weren't convinced. You know for a fact you'd seen him looking at her perky little ass and you hated that it wasn't yours that he was looking at.

"You haven't looked at me that way since we got pregnant," You mumbled annoyingly at him. Ever since you'd gotten pregnant you felt as though he had been ignoring you and looking for someone younger, someone better. Someone that didn't look as though they had swallowed a planet. But that was the joys when you were carrying twins.

"I look at you that way all of the time you just never notice," Hoseok sighed as he sat down on the sofa and rubbed the bridge of his nose. He knew that your hormones were going to be all over the place but he never would have imagined that they would get this bad.

"I only have eyes for you babe," He cooed while holding his arms open, expecting you to walk right into them and smile but you didn't. You walked past him and shook your head, there was no way he was going to sweet talk his way out of this one.

"You can look at whoever you want, you're Jung Hoseok, the most feared man in Seoul." You said dramatically while walking toward the bedroom, you wanted to change into a baggy shirt and eat your cravings, not having to worry about anything else right now.

"Yn, you're being a little childish, don't you think?" You froze as soon as you heard the words leave his mouth, your body turned slowly and it creeped Hoseok out a little. It was like one of the scary movies where the ghost slowly turns around and just stared at the camera.

"wow! So now I'm childish?!" Hoseok groaned rolling his head back against the back of the sofa, it was going to be a long night if you were going to sit and pick on everything he was going to say.

"Yn, come on! I didn't mean it, I was just-" He stopped speaking when you slammed the bedroom door and he groaned staring up at the ceiling.

"It's going to be a long night," He mumbled to himself before shutting his eyes in hopes of getting a little sleep.

[X]

When Hoseok finally woke up he checked the time and decided he needed to go and check on you. It was almost four in the morning and he was ready to kiss and make up with you - providing that you'd calmed down a little first.

"Hey, baby?" He whispered while walking into the bedroom only to find the bed completely empty and all of the lights were switched on.

"Yn?!" He cried out while running toward the balcony door that was wide open, the balcony gate wide open since it was on the ground floor and looked right out into the back garden.

"Babe! You out there?!" He yelled while walking into the back garden to find absolutely no sign of you anywhere in sight and he rushed back inside to grab his gun and phone in the hopes of finding you.

[X]

"Welcome to your new home," You giggled while walking into the house with a puppy by your feet, Hoseok looked up from the laptop in front of him and froze.

"Cancel that last order," He mumbled into the phone without taking his eyes off you, slamming his phone down as he got up from the sofa.

"Yn?! What the hell?!" He rushed toward you, holding your face in his hands and tilting it from side to side looking for any signs that you could have been hurt while you were out.

"You've been gone all morning!" He yelled as he finally realised that you were perfectly fine, you got down onto your knees and let the puppy go so he could walk around the house and get a good sense of everything.

"I bought a dog," You smiled as though there was nothing wrong with what you had done. You'd originally only gone out so that you could get some air but you'd ended up coming across an animal shelter and you couldn't just leave the little puppy alone.

"I can see that. What were you thinking?" Hoseok sighed as he followed you through the hallway and toward the kitchen so that you could give some food to the dog.

"I was thinking that the twins are going to want a dog eventually so why not get one now."

"No. I mean," Hoseok sighed as he tried to be as calm as possible about all of this so he didn't start another fight with you. All morning long he had felt unbelievably sick to his stomach, he thought someone had taken you hostage and he was seconds away from calling a raid on one of the other men's homes.

"I don't care that you got a dog, what were you thinking when you left without telling me?" You glanced at Hoseok and looked down at your hands, maybe it had been childish and immature of you but you'd been mad at him.

"I was mad at you and then I wasn't mad...I would have text but-"

"Your phone was here," He said as he held up the phone and you smiled weakly, quickly walking into his arms and hugging him tightly. "I'm sorry I was a mess yesterday, I know you didn't stare at her ass," You whispered as he rubbed your back softly, kissing the top of your head and smiling a little.

"I'm sorry I called you childish," He smiled before kissing the top of your head once more and getting you to introduce him to the new addition to the family.

NAMJON:1.4K

"I suppose you think it's funny? How funny would it be if I shot you right now?" You heard Namjoon yell followed by the cries of someone begging for their life. It wasn't something you weren't used to by any means but you were trying to sleep and the last thing you wanted was to hear your husband torturing someone in the basement of your home. Normally Namjoon wouldn't bring his work home with him but this was something different, something personal and he would be dammed if he was going to let this man get away with what he had done.

"Can you shut the fuck up?" You asked as you walked into the basement, staring down at the man that was being held onto a chair with a gag in his mouth. It looked as though the boys had just finished pouring water over a towel on his face and he looked terrified. Once again, it wasn't anything you hadn't seen before and it didn't scare you. Nothing seemed to scare you now that you were married to one of the most feared men in Seoul, no one messed with you. You were completely untouchable to everyone around you.

"Yn, go upstairs," Namjoon ordered not lifting his eyes from the man in front of you who seemed to be staring at you, smirking under the gag that was inside of his mouth. You eyed the man up before turning to look at Namjoon, you didn't care what Namjoon did as long as the man didn't wake you up anymore.

"Not until you get him to shut up, cut out his tongue if you have to. Some of us are trying to sleep and your baby appears to be trying to keep me awake." You grumbled at him. It had been two weeks of broken sleep for you and you were beginning to get driven up the wall. All you wanted was one decent night of peaceful sleep but it appeared as though it was never going to happen for you.

"Babe, please." There was a slight pleading tone to Namjoon's words and you stared at him confused, he'd never gotten like this with you before when you'd walked in on him doing something like this.

"Joonie?" You frowned before everything happened within a couple of seconds, the chair hit the floor and people scrambled to grab hold of the man that was now on the loose and running straight for you but he never made it to you. A loud gunshot sounded and the guy hit the floor right beside your feet, splattering your face with blood as you turned to look at your husband in shock. Your whole body was shaking as you realised the man had been attempting to grab you and if it hadn't been for Namjoon he probably would have succeeded and who knows what could have happened.

"I told you to fucking go upstairs!" He boomed out, his face turning red as he got angry with you. How could you not follow a simple instruction?

"Are you that dumb you don't know how to follow a fucking order?!" He yelled out without thinking about his words first, all he cared about right now was the fact that someone had just tried to attack him.

"You're saying this was my fault?! You're the idiot that didn't have him tied down!" You weren't going to let him get away with passing the blame onto you. It was simple if you were torturing someone you tied them down so they didn't have a chance to get free and leave.

"I gave you an order," Namjoon was seething with anger as he stared down at you, your eyes staring back into his with just the same amount of anger that he was giving to you.

"What did I tell you about you and your orders?!" You asked him while letting out a dry and sarcastic laugh. When you first started dating you had told him you weren't one of his men, nor were you a puppet to pull the strings of.

"Do you have any idea what he would have done to you?! What he could have done!?"

"He didn't though, I'm fine." You grumbled as you walked away from him, wanting to shower instead of standing there covered in some man's blood.

"Don't walk away from me!" Namjoon called out but you slammed and locked the bathroom door just to make a point of not following his orders and he began yelling at his men to clean everything up.

[X]

It had been two weeks. Two weeks and there were no signs of you anywhere, your phone had been turned off and left at the house so there was no way of tracking you. Namjoon knew he never should have taken the tracking device off your car and the one on your necklace, he should have known better.

"I want every house, shop, bakery and everywhere you can find searched!" Namjoon yelled at the man in front of him who appeared to be shaking. Ever since you'd walked away Namjoon had been worried sick, barely sleeping and had become more irritable than ever before. It was a miracle that most of the people he was working with weren't dead already with the way that they were acting in front of him.

"Boss," One of them mumbled as the front door opened to reveal you and your mother-in-law smiling at one another and carrying bags.

"Where the fuck have you been?!" Namjoon's voice was deep and loud as he got up from the sofa and stared over at you,

"Language," His mother scolded before taking the bags out of his hand and handing them off to one of Namjoon's many men, ordering him to take them straight up to the bedroom.

"I told you I was going to stay with your mum," You said as you watched his mother go to make some tea for everyone. The house was a complete mess and you wondered what had been going on for the last two weeks.

"No, you didn't." He mumbled trying to remember anything you might have said that would even hint as to where you might be but you had. You'd told him weeks ago that you were going to be spending some time with his mother.

"Yes, I did. Three weeks ago, I told you I'd be going to stay with her so I could get some peace and quiet." He shook his head at you, he was almost positive that he couldn't remember you saying anything.

"No."

"Namjoon! I even wrote it down on your many calendars and added sticky notes around the house." His mother could be heard laughing softly from the kitchen.

"What?" Namjoon hadn't seen any, mostly because he'd been too busy panicking to think about looking for sticky notes.

"I added one to the food in the fridge." You stared at him before realising that he probably hadn't been eating properly like he was supposed to.

"I've been...e-eating mostly take out while I was out looking for you,"

"Joonie." You sighed, walking over to him and then down at everything that was on your coffee table. A list of places that had all been ransacked as they had all been searching for you, and not to mention a list of serial killers all dead now since Namjoon thought they'd taken you.

"You could have called your mother,"

"You could have taken your phone," He countered your argument and you looked up at him, you were partly to blame for a lot of what had happened but you never would have expected any of this.

"I was mad at you," You admitted before sighing,

"Let's clean the house up, we should do that and get something- oh god," You groaned, suddenly holding your bump as you gripped onto Namjoon tightly.

"What? What is it?" He questioned repeatedly before his mother walked into the room,

"It's time," She said calmly, rushing over to you and holding your hand in hers as you began to breathe deeply through your nose trying to manage the pain as best as you could.

"Time?" Namjoon frowned staring at you as you both headed for the front door of the house,

"To have a baby," You yelled out at him as if it wasn't obvious enough what you were going through right now.

"B-But it's a month early!" Namjoon called out as he rushed to grab the "go" bag that you had waiting for you for months now, standing on the other side of you and holding your hand.

"Babies don't do schedules, son. Let's go!" His mother chuckled as she began to help you out of the house and in the direction of the car while Namjoon ordered his men to get the house prepared.

JIMIN:1.1k

The sunlight was blinding to Jimin and he groaned trying to fall back to sleep but the giant lightbulb in the sun was making it too hard for him to actually fall back to sleep.

"Fuck," Jimin grunted as he slowly rolled over in the bed to cuddle into you, only to find cold and empty sheets where you should have been sleeping. It wasn't right, he remembered going to sleep with you in his arms...or rather falling asleep in the same room as you but you weren't here now. It wasn't like you to wake up and not wake Jimin up at the same time.

"Babe?" He called out, slowly getting up from the bed and changing into some fresh clothes. Maybe you'd gotten up to make breakfast but he couldn't hear the usual music you would play while cooking. Nor could he smell the burning of the first pancake. He rushed to check the bathrooms, maybe you were having morning sickness but you were nowhere in sight.

"Yn?" He called out once again before walking into the living room to find it completely empty. The only sign of someone being there was the cleaner and his two guards who were all staring at him and waiting for instructions to do something. It was Sunday which mean Jimin had the entire day off just to spend with you, it was upsetting to him that you had just left without a word about it.

"Sir? Can we help with anything?" One of his guards asked when he noticed how distressed Jimin appeared to be getting when he couldn't find you.

"Have you seen Yn? She didn't mention anything about going out," Jimin explained as he rubbed the back of his neck, frowning as he tried to remember anything from the night before but most of it was a blur. He'd been drinking while out to dinner with you and he'd gone a little too hard on the drinks,

"Not since last night when the two of you came home," The guard explained while shaking his head. None of them had seen you since the previous night and it was no wonder you had walked off without explanation after what they had heard.

"She hasn't checked with you before going out?" Jimin frowned, it really wasn't like you to go out without telling anyone about it. Even if you and Jimin were fighting you would usually leave a note or take a guard out with you.

"No, sir." Both of them answered, an uneasy feeling began to settle inside of Jimin as he thought about what could have happened to you. If you'd gone out alone there was a possibility someone had taken you and Jimin wanted answers.

"Check the CCTV footage for me and find her. NOW!" Jimin boomed before looking to the cleaner who was staring back at him saying nothing but Jimin could tell by the look on her face that she knew something.

"Did you see her?" He asked harshly before she shook her head,

"Not since your fight last night,"

"Fight?" Jimin couldn't remember a fight with you, at least not a big one that would make you run away from him.

"The two of you came back late and you had been flirting with someone at the bar,"

"Oh...Right," It all rushed back to Jimin about what had happened. The two of you had gone out to dinner when he humped into an old friend. Someone he used to date and he began to talk with her a lot, catching up with her and your pregnancy brain instantly took it as him flirting with another woman. Blowing up into a huge fight as soon as you got home until he passed out on the bed from exhaustion.

"I want her found, now." He panicked turning around and heading back up to his office to try and go through the CCTV footage he had inside of the house to see if he could see you coming or doing anywhere.

[X]

There was no sign of you anywhere, the guards had checked all of the rooms that they could find but the place was huge. Not only that but most of the cameras inside of the house hadn't been working the night before thanks to the storm and Jimin was worried you were out in the streets. So he was going out with a team while another team stayed in in case someone called or you came back home.

"What are you doing?" You asked suddenly when you saw Jimin rushing toward the front door covered in a layer of sweat and looking ill. You figured he was hungover or something but as soon as he stared at you he let out a shaky breath, You'd just come out of the spare bedroom to see him and a bunch of the guards rushing around the house looking quite panicked,

"Where the fuck have you been?" Jimin snapped harshly making you stare at him in silence, you didn't just come out of the room to be insulted. You'd come out for food and some clothes not to have someone yell at you. You were over the fight from the night before and you realised you were probably being over dramatic about everything.

"Sorry...I- Where have you been? Why didn't you tell someone where you were going?" You frowned, it wasn't as though you'd gone far and you figured he and everyone else would have seen it on the footage where you were.

"I was in the guest room. I was staying away from your drunk ass after we fought," You mumbled before he kissed the top of your head softly, bringing you closer to him as he shook his head at you.

"I'm sorry about last night, I wasn't flirting...But I'm sorry we fought so badly you slept somewhere else," He told you as he walked you toward the kitchen, nodding to the cook to start making you both something to eat.

"I'm sorry too, I think the hormones were making me crazy jealous," You admitted shyly as he shook his head at you, promising it that it was all in the past now.

TAEHYUNG:1.5K

You threw your arms around the waist of your husband and smiled as you cuddled into him. He was supposed to be getting dressed but you had been distracting him with non-stop cuddles for most of the morning. But it was finally time for him to head out for the day and he couldn't keep putting it off because of you.

"I'm going out for tteokbokki today, do you need anything while I'm out?" You quizzed as Taehyung pulled on a tie and frowned at the thought of it. You hadn't mentioned anything about going out yesterday or this morning when you were discussing the day's events. He wracked his brain trying to remember if you'd said anything to him a couple of weeks ago but he couldn't remember you saying anything or even adding it to the calendar.

"What?" He turned to face you and you began doing his tie-up for him with a giant smile plastered across your face. You'd been looking forward to going out for lunch for the last week and it had completely slipt your mind to tell Taehyung before now.

"Tteokbokki...With the girls, we want to go out for lunch together. I forgot to say something when we first made plans. But I think we're also going out shopping to get a few bits for the baby," Taehyung nodded along, he saw nothing wrong with any of this as long as you took Jimin or Hoseok with you to keep watch on you while you were out. There was no way he was going to let you go out there alone, you were like a walking target for anyone that wanted to hurt Taehyung.

"The girls?" He questioned, just to be sure he knew who was going to be there and they were who he approved of. Not that he told you who you could and couldn't hang out with but there were some people you knew who he just didn't trust.

"Me, Jin's wife, Jimin's wife...Namjoon's girlfriend said she wants to come too," You shrugged your shoulders and patted his tie down as you finished doing it for him. As soon as he heard that Namjoon's girlfriend was going he knew you weren't going to like what he had to say,

"No."

"No?" You frowned, looking up at him. It wasn't as though you were asking his permission. You'd only asked if he wanted something brought back from the shopping trip.

"No."

"I think you're confused, I wasn't asking for permission. I'm not a child." You stated while standing your ground, putting your hand onto your hip as you stared up at your boyfriend. What part of him thought he could tell you what you could and couldn't do?

"But you happen to be carrying mine."

"So? That doesn't mean you get to dictate every little thing that I do." You mumbled while heading over to the wardrobe to look for something to wear but Taehyung wasn't letting this go. There was no way on this earth that you were going to go out with Namjoon's girlfriend.

"True but you're not going out with them,"

"Why?" You turned to face him. He'd never really had a problem with you going out before and it wasn't as though you were asking to fly to another country. It was a simple girls' date in the middle of the city for food and some light shopping, you'd take the guards with you since it was a mandatory thing for you these days.

"I don't trust Namjoon's girlfriend," He answered plainly, giving you no reasoning behind the statement.

"Why?"

"Because they're not married yet, who knows what she's up to." You frowned at this, what did that have to do with anything? She just didn't want to get married and there was nothing wrong with that.

"What are you talking about?"

"She's said no to marrying him three times, I don't trust her. She could be using him to get closer to you." You blinked at him, you could hardly believe that was what he truly believed Namjoon's girlfriend of five years could be doing. If he was right - which he wasn't - she was playing a very long game in order to get close to you.

"You're being paranoid, she's just not wanting to get married that's all. Please, I'm dying to get some tteokbokki," You groaned at the thought of it. It had been one of your pregnancy cravings lately and you were dying to get your hands on some at a specific restaurant in the city.

"No. I'm being smart. You can go for tteokbokki with Hoseok and Jimin later when they get back," He shrugged it off and you stared at him, you couldn't believe he was being this idiotic about something.

"But I don't want to go with them, I want to go with the girls so they can help me with pregnancy questions," You tried to play the pregnancy card but it wasn't going to work on him. He knew you knew everything there was since you'd read all of the pregnancy books you could possibly get your hands on and if - by some miracle - there was something else. You had the internet to ask for help.

"You have google for that,"

"Tae!" You yelled out but he was already at the bedroom door and ready to leave, he looked at you one last time before saying,

"I'm serious. You're not going and that's final." He slammed the bedroom door and you smirked to yourself, you'd just see about that.

[X]

Taehyung had done nothing but text and call you all afternoon but you were being petty and ignoring him. Decided to spend time with just Namjoon's girlfriend just to piss him off that little bit more and the two of you were finally heading home for the night. Only there were Police everywhere you turned and it was quite jarring to see them working so hard on something. You thought a child had gone missing at first but you hadn't seen any distressed parents walking around and there was no sign of a large group of people all looking for a child.

"What happened?" You asked as you moved closer to one of the officers that appeared to be hanging something up on the wall in front of him. Namjoon's girlfriend had headed to get the car while you walked to take a look at what was going on,

"We're looking for-" He turned to face you and he turned pale quickly before blushing and smiling proudly to himself,

"You."

"Me?" You frowned staring at the man,

"Yes. You!" He said as he began to point at the poser he had been hanging up. There it was in black and white, a photo of you with all of your specifications and you let out a deep groan. How could Taehyung do this? You'd gone out for a few hours and you even told him you'd be out, it wasn't your fault if he decided you weren't allowed to but went anyway.

"That reward is as good as mine," He smirked before taking your wrists and handcuffing you making you hiss out in pain, the cuffs were a little too tight and you could have sworn you felt them digging into your skin.

"Excuse me!" You cried out as he began to walk you to his patrol car,

"You're coming back to the station," He said to you as he helped you into the back of the car, you stared at him and struggled against the cuffs you were in.

"If you let me out of the handcuffs I'll come with you easily." You mumbled but he shut the door in your face and got into the front of the car.

"I'm not taking that chance, there's a million won on the line,"

[X]

"You're lucky I'm not firing you!" Taehyung yelled once he saw that your wrists were bleeding a little from how tight the officer had cuffed you.

"It hurts," You whined as he gently kissed the marks and got you out of the cell,

"Sir...About the reward," The officer said as he came closer to you and Taehyung, both of you staring down at the balding man as he had the nerve to ask for something after hurting you.

"I'll take that as a no," He said before leaving you both alone together. Taehyung shook his head and let out a small sigh,

"We'll go and see a doctor, I told you not to go out with Namjoon's girlfriend." He scolded but you ignored him, rolling your eyes a little.

"In case you aren't aware, this-" You held up your wrists for him to see,

"Was because of your dumb reward, Namjoon's girlfriend and I were having a nice day and talking about how she's planning on asking Namjoon to marry her this time," You grumbled, following Taehyung outside to his car as Taehyung stared at you, feeling bad for not trusting her enough to be alone with you.

"I just want to go home," You admitted as he kissed the top of your head, apologising to you as he helped you inside of his car.

JUNGKOOK:1.1K

That morning when Jungkook woke up to find you fast asleep he smiled to himself, he was going to be back before you even woke up if he was lucky and he would save on arguments between you both. Ever since you'd gotten pregnant the two of you seemed to be fighting a lot more but he put it down to all of the hormones within your body. So he didn't want to wake you up and tell you he was going to be gone if it meant he was going to be back soon.

Only it hadn't exactly gone to plan since he'd been at work for almost eight hours and now he wasn't able to get into contact with you. He'd been leaving voicemails all day with you and your personal guard but you must have been ignoring him for being gone.

"What do you mean she's not here?" Jungkook asked as he stared at your guard who appeared to be completely nonchalant about you not being anywhere in the house.

"She went for a walk, boss. She said you said it was okay for her to be alone," Jungkook couldn't believe what he was hearing, how could someone who worked for him be so dumb? Jungkook thought he had hired the best of the best, not some idiot who didn't think to double-check the facts that he was being given.

"And you believed her without checking with me? Are you stupid?!" He screamed making the man flinch in front of him before looking down at the floor bowing a little as he began to apologise over and over again.

"I'm sorry sir, I should have called."

"You better hope she's not dead or hurt because if she is, it'll be your life on the line!" He yelled before grabbing his keys and going on the hunt for you. You had to be somewhere, it wasn't like you to go very far when you were upset so Jungkook was going to stay calm as he checked all of the usual spots for you.

[X]

It had been hours since Jungkook left the house to come and look for you and he was starting to feel sick to his stomach. There was no call for a ransom though so he was holding out hope that you were perfectly safe and ignoring him somewhere comfortable. But he'd checked all of the usual spots he would find you when the two of you would fight. The cafe owner said he'd seen you that morning for breakfast but you'd left as soon as he had bought up Jungkook into the topic of discussion.

"I'm going to throw up," Jungkook told Jin - his right-hand man - as they walked into the house together. The police were on patrol for you trying to find you as quickly as possible and Jungkook was about half a second away from calling in outside forces if he needed to.

"She'll show up," Jin said as he noticed that your shoes were by the front door when they hadn't been earlier, it was the only sign that Jin knew you were home.

"When?! Huh?! Have you heard from her?!" Jungkook asked sarcastically before shaking his head at the man and groaning. You could have been anywhere in South Korea by now, all of that time wasted because some dumb guard - that was fired now - hadn't thought to check with Jungkook himself.

"No...But-" Jin tried to speak but Jungkook ignored him and cut him off too quickly,

"You don't understand it! Do you? She's pregnant and completely exposed when she's walking around the streets without protection! She could be killed! Someone could take her and then take the baby before killing her!"

"Sir, I don't think that's very likely." Jin once again tried to explain that you were walking toward them down the hall right behind Jungkook and you looked upset and you were. You knew it was wrong of you to run off the way that you did but you had been sick to death of your husband leaving you alone all day while you were stuck with guards. All you wanted was for him to take you out on a small walk since they were supposed to be good for the baby.

"Oh? Do you know something I don't?"

"Actually, I think-"

"You don't know anything," Jungkook said as he once again cut Jin off from what he was trying to say, you smirked a little at the sight before you felt a pang of pain radiate up and down your back before you bent over and whimpered. There was pooling in your pants from where your water had just broken.

"Sir," Jin said as he pointed behind him but Jungkook shook his head, still in a blind rage about the guard he had fired earlier that morning.

"I'm going to fucking kill that guard when I get my hands on him. How much of an idiot-"

"Junkook!" You screamed out as you stared at him, your body leaning against the wall as you panted heavily trying to catch your breath, the contractions were stronger than any of the birthing classes had ever prepared you for and you hated it.

"Baby?!"

"Jungkook...Please, we need to go." You groaned out, stepping closer to him as he wrapped his arms around your waist slowly walking with you toward the front door looking completely confused.

"Go?"

"Go! It's time to go!" You screamed before pointing down at your pants which were still wet and Jungkook's eyes widened as he realised what was going on. Panic hit him as he realised that it was finally happening and you were about to give birth to his son.

"Shit, shit! Shit!" Jungkook screamed out as he began to panic and run around looking for your "go bag" that you had packed in readiness for this moment. It was only a couple of weeks early but you were both more than ready to become parents to a beautiful baby boy, Jin smirked at you as he picked up the bag from the living room counter. It was close by the front door so that neither you nor Jungkook would forget it on the big day,

"Kookie...Lets go," You begged as you began to follow Jin out of the house, your hand getting taken by Jungkook as he mumbled everything he was going to do as soon as he got to the hospital,

"Private room, private doctors, got to call our parents and all of the men." He mumbled repeatedly as you smiled a little quickly kissing his cheek and apologising for running out on him that morning.

Tagline: @millenniumspec @chiisaiblog @rjdy-367 @tinyoonsblog @sw33tnight @taestannie @cherrybubblesandvodka @army24--7 @acciocriativity @mitzwinchester @heyjiminnie @kimahnjung98 @halesandy @jin-from-the-block @aerastus @namjooningelsewhere @ratherbefangirling @psychosupernatural @afternoonteabiscuit @lyoongx @periandernyx @heeseunger24 @laylasbunbunny @jeonsorchid

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oliversrarebooks · 5 months

Text

The Rare Bookseller Part 31: Fitz's Showtime

Masterlist

June 1905

TW: mind control, captivity, hypnotic induction

Fitz wasn't one for making plans, normally trusting in his ability to wing his way through any situation life threw at him. That approach had worked well enough until it had ended up with him imprisoned in a vampires' auction house.

Over the past few days, he'd already suffered what was practically a fate worse than death: being left with nothing to do but stew in his own mind. His treacherous brain had helpfully supplied an exhaustive list of every mistake he'd made along the way to end up here, and all of the ways he could have avoided this fate now that it was too late.

But with his cell neighbors unresponsive -- and he didn't want to think too hard about how that might have come about -- there wasn't anything at all to occupy him apart from meals and sleep. The meals were surprisingly generous and varied, and Fitz supposed that if they really were vampires, they must be fattening him up the way you would a prized pig. Sleep was less generous, as the pitch blackness, complete silence, stiff cot, and vampire guards all conspired to make him uneasy.

So he had plenty of time to think of how he would approach it when Lily came for his mind. Now, he'd ended up in a plush, too-comfortable chair, facing down the vampire who'd captured him.

He wasn't even tied down. He'd been nothing but ingratiating towards the vampires the whole time he'd been here. Lily had made it beyond obvious that he wasn't going to escape through strength or speed, and on his first night, he personally witnessed an angry, cursing, struggling man being dragged away and coming back a hollow shell.

No, that sort of struggle was pointless. He could instead bide his time. Be friendly and charming. Hope that someone would let their guard down or give him a special privilege. He'd have an easier time of it and more opportunities to free himself. At least, that was the theory.

Of course, all of that was for naught if he were actually put deep under whatever mesmeric spell they were using to keep the other captives still and silent.

He knew very well now that Lily was capable of it. He also knew that simply resisting would not do -- little chance they would give up and let him go instead of trying over and over again until he was broken. No, the only thing to do would be to play along, pretend to be under her spell, and hope he could keep the spell from touching him in truth. The longest of long shots, but he didn't have a better idea.

"So I hear you've been on your best behavior," said Lily with a smug smile. "Joking around with the blood grader and everything."

Fitz lounged in the chair as though his existence weren't on the line. "I wouldn't dream of being rude to a man who calls my blood special grade A fancy."

"And here I worried you might be trouble. But it seems you do know your place, better than you think," said Lily. "That's why I have a proposition for you."

"If it's another five dollar bet, I'm going to have to respectfully pass on that."

"Oh, no, nothing like that," she said, amused. "As I told you before, I'd like to sell you to a friend with deep pockets and a soft heart. I think he will appreciate you. The less you resist the conditioning, the more I can allow you to keep that wit of yours. That works out for both of us, doesn't it?"

"Oh, yes, just peachy," he said. She couldn't possibly think he was daft enough to trust her a second time, not when she held all the cards.

"I know you don't believe me, but it's actually a great deal for you. You'd live in a mansion and have an easy life, all in exchange for just a bit of blood." Her words were honeyed, and Fitz could practically feel them worming their way into his mind. "You won't have to be Fitzwilliam de Hastings, disgraceful and useless third son of the de Hastings shipping conglomerate. You won't have to be Phantom Fitz, scraping and clawing for fame with your little magic tricks. You can just be Fitz. Loved. Wanted. Cherished."

If only any of that were true. If only it weren't just a trick to soften his mind and get him to accept a vampiric master, one who would "love" and "cherish" him the same way he might "cherish" a fine bottle of wine.

"As intriguing as all of that is, and as flattered as I am by those lovely descriptions of me, I'm going to have to decline your offer," he said with a tight smile.

Her own smile turned predatory. "You haven't really given me a chance to persuade you."

"I think I've heard --"

"Have you, though? Or have you been half paying attention while focused all on yourself?" she said, leaning in closer. "Here I am, my entire focus centered on you, and you aren't repaying the favor. Why don't you focus, Fitz? Why don't you relax?"

There was no doubt she was exerting her power this time. Fitz could feel the magnetic pull of it. This was it, this was showtime -- the moment he had to somehow convince her that he was being enthralled, without actually falling. He couldn't make it seem too sudden or she wouldn't buy it. What should he do? Should he be visibly affected by what she just did? But he'd hesitated and --

"You think too much," she said. "I'm going to need to stop that first. Slow and soothe your mind, make it so hard to think that you just give in and listen. Look where all your thinking and scheming has gotten you. Won't it feel so much nicer not to do that?"

He nodded, with a bit of hesitation, widening his eyes, playacting that her mesmerism was taking him down once more. Lily was good at luring a mark, but so was he.

"Yes, isn't that easy?" she said, amused. "Just let my words soothe you so you can listen. It'll feel so good when those racing thoughts slow down. We both know it's inevitable, so why keep searching for an escape that won't come? Why not take the easy and pleasant path?"

"Because, as I told you before, I don't care to be a vampire's convenient lunch box," he said, making sure to slow his voice and lace it with doubt. The more she thought he was falling, the more careless she would be.

"It's so cute to watch your thoughts turn in your head. I can practically see them, dear. I can see that machinery working those threads of thought, weaving them together into plans and fears and witty little comments. I can see all the weaknesses in those gears, all the places where they can easily be slowed. Can you see it?"

"Hm?" he said, caught off guard, not sure how he should respond to that one. Did she suspect what he was up to? Of course she might, she might've mesmerized hundreds of people for all he knew, and he surely wasn't the first to think of pretending.

But that didn't mean she was always successful. Of course she claimed that she was. That was an important part of the confidence game; he would've done the same in her shoes. But for all he knew, her actual success rate was poor. Surely he wouldn't be the first to fool her. After all...

After all, he was...

Fitz blinked, trying to remember the end to that thought.

"...you don't even need to listen as your mind slowly drains of its cares and worries... so relaxed... so comfortable..."

He shook himself in mild alarm. She'd been talking this whole time and he'd zoned out thinking and hadn't kept up his act. He arranged his face into what he hoped was a convincingly dazed expression.

"How are you feeling, Fitz?" she asked.

"...Good," he said, an answer that seemed safe, as he wasn't quite sure how she expected him to feel.

"Good," she repeated. "Isn't this nice? Having someone's full attention on you without having to fight to earn it? Isn't it nice to be so wanted?"

His brow furrowed. "Well..."

"That's how it's going to be from now on. No more fight for attention, no more fight for approval, no more fight for survival. You'll have your needs taken care of and overflowing praise to boot. Just like you crave, deep down."

Oh, she was good. Good enough to make his chest ache with the thought of what she was offering. If only...

"You're going to be the best thrall, Fitz. I've never seen anyone as delectable, handsome, and charming, with such an intoxicating scent. You'll have your vampire eating out of the palm of your hand -- literally, perhaps."

Fitz blinked slowly, wondering how he should react to keep up the game, trying to ignore the warm sensations he got from the praise, no matter how manipulative and insincere "Do you think that cheap flattery will work on --"

"Look at me," she said, hooking a finger under his chin and gazing straight into his eyes. "You can see it, can't you? A future of being cherished and loved?"

"I --"

"Imagine a vampire who wants you, one who wants so badly to drink deep of your blood that he practically worships the ground you walk on. He'll want you always by his side, his beloved prize, protected and treasured."

It wasn't hard to imagine. It wasn't as if he hadn't thought about things like this on lonely, difficult nights. Something beyond sex and courtship. Intimacy. Comfort.

The kind of things that he hardly dared to think about for long, lest he feel their absence too keenly. The kind of things that were meant for those who had grown up wanted, who knew how to trust and let themselves fall in love. These delights weren't meant for the kind of person who wore a mask wherever he went and conned everyone he met.

"Just relax." She ran her fingers through his hair. "No more pain, no more struggle. No more struggle, now. No more struggle."

If any of this were true, it really wouldn't be so bad.

"No more struggle, no more fighting, no more resisting."

"I'm..." he mumbled. "I'm not..." He had to pretend that he was falling. He let his eyes blink so slowly.

"Oh, my dear, my Fitz, I know you aren't. You're doing such a good job right now."

His eyelids fluttered. "I am?"

"Yes, yes you are. You're doing such a good job. I told you, you're a natural. You're perfect."

He couldn't help but smile. That was good. She believed it was working.

"That's a good boy now. All you really want is approval, isn't it? For someone to see you and decide they're exactly what they need."

"Yeah..."

"You're going to have that, and all the praise and approval you could ever want," she said. "I promise."

He couldn't trust her, he remembered. This was all fake, just like every other time he'd been promised something. But he had to pretend that he believed. He was good at pretending.

"That's right, you're good at pretending. You're doing such a good job pretending to go under for me, Fitz."

Fitz felt the relief wash over him. Thank goodness for that. He'd been so nervous about this the past few nights, trying to convince himself that he'd be just fine outsmarting a vampire and saving himself.

Wait --

"It's okay!" Lily laughed. "It's okay, really. I know what you're up to. I expected that from you, of course. And I know what you fear. You fear being made mindless and docile like most of your cell-mates."

Fitz crushed down his panic. His plan wasn't working, his mind already felt hazy and sluggish from Lily's mesmerism, and now his worst nightmare might be about to come true. He'd spent so long escaping from a family where every little word and move was regimented, scrutinized, criticized, judged and punished. At least in those days he could escape into his head. Now, he'd be brought back to that place, with no recourse.

"...Yes, obviously, I fear that," he said, hating how vulnerable he sounded but not knowing what else to say. "Who wouldn't?"

"Who wouldn't?" she echoed. "But it doesn't matter, ultimately, because I've already given you a powerful hypnotic trigger the first time I had you in my thrall, and told you to forget it."

Adrenaline surged through him. "No, there's no way you --"

"Showtime, Fitz."

He only had one more brief moment to panic before his mind shut down entirely.

---

"...two, one, and wake. Come back to the land of the living now, Fitz."

He opened his eyes, feeling like he'd just awoken from a really refreshing nap. It took him a second to realize where he was and what had just happened to him, and all relaxation was immediately wiped out by his fear. Miss Lily had given him a hypnotic trigger, she must have erased his mind, he'd be nothing more than --

Except... he clearly wasn't.

"Confused?"

"You..." He wasn't really sure how to approach this. "You didn't wipe my mind, sir."

"Did you want me to?" she asked with a grin.

"No! Absolutely not, sir," he said. "But you had me -- you knocked me out --" He pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to make sense the overwhelming swirl of thoughts in his mind. Grateful that he still had an overwhelming swirl of thoughts in his mind. "What did you do, sir?"

"I made you obedient to vampires. I removed your ability to escape. And I made you crave our feedings. Nothing more, nothing less."

Fitz stared. It couldn't be that simple. Not that he was thrilled about the changes, but he had expected much more and much worse.

But he didn't feel different. He was still capable of thought. He was still nervous. He could still remember who he was.

"If that's all you were going to do, sir... why did you bother with all of your setup? Why not just mesmerize me the moment I walked in?"

"Because mesmerism is a performance, dear Fitz. I thought that you of all humans would understand that," she said.

Fitz could feel his eyebrow twitch.

"There's magic involved, of course, or it wouldn't take so strongly, but magic alone doesn't make me so effective at molding perfect thralls. Cold reading, misdirection, distraction -- all of these are critical to what I do. I needed your original plan to fail before I truly conditioned you, and I needed to plant the seeds that a vampire might cherish and accept you. The results speak for themselves, don't you think?"

"I'm not even sure I can tell what the results are, sir."

"Precisely."

Fitz scowled. Was he really that obedient now? Did she actually make him "crave their feedings"? So he would just accept some bloodsucker gently tilting his head to expose his vulnerable neck... a wicked grin as sharp fangs grew closer... his mind growing hazy with pleasure...

"Oh, goddamn it, sir."

Miss Lily laughed. "Now do you see?"

It was a relief, in a way, that he could feel the results of the thrall now. That meant he could get a bead on what she'd done to him. "Yes, I'm afraid I do, sir -- hold on, you also made me call you 'sir', didn't you?"

"Any vampire. Yes. But you're allowed to say it as sarcastically as you want."

"Thank you for that most gracious allowance, sir."

"Oh, you're very welcome."

Part 30.5 >> Masterlist >> Part 32

Extras: Emily's Crayons Fitz in the Snow

Fitz's Volunteer Part One

Thank you for reading about Fitz.

@d-cs @latenightcupsofcoffee @thecyrulik @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night @wanderinggoblin @whumpyourdamnpears @only-shadows-dwell-where-we-are @pressedpenn @pigeonwhumps @amusedmuralist @xx-adam-xx @ivycloak @irregular-book @whumpsoda @mj-or-say10 @pokemaniacgemini @whumpshaped @whumpsday @morning-star-whump @shinyotachi @silly-scroimblo-skrunkl @steh-lar-uh-nuhs @pirefyrelight @theauthorintraining-blog @whump-me-all-night-long @anonfromcanada @typewrittenfangs @tessellated-sunl1ght @cleverinsidejoke @abirbable @ichorousambrosia @a-formless-entity

#whump #whump writing #vampire #mind control #hypnosis #captivity #rare bookseller #fitz #lily

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scarasimping · 11 months

Note

But have we talked about Pirate! Scara angst?

He knows he’s a pirate and he steals and gets in trouble but it doesn’t you from loving him, he’ll distance himself not wanting you to get hurt, if he got caught stealing something of value you would run after him and the guards, you know when they lost him were he would be and when you find him…

Insert fluff

note before you start!: I haven't mentioned it in anything yet, but in my mind the princess is under strict watch, so it's almost impossible for her to leave the castle and see scara....almost. I'm also trying to stick closer to the plot I have in mind for pirate scara and the princess’s story, so it's a little different than the request. hopefully it all makes sense.

also i was listening to work song by hozier while writing this i think its fitting for how scara feels about the princess.

word count: 1.85k

Pirate! Scara believes wholeheartedly that he does not deserve you. He's a liar and a thief; he can't wash away the blood on his hands from all of the battles he fought, where someone had to die and he couldn't let it be him.

Yet, these same hands are the ones you hold so gently, the ones that you bring to cup your own face and kiss the palm of. He feels as though being with him is going to stain your perfect and gentle soul, that he's smearing the blood he's taken onto you while you just smile so beautifully and tell him how much you love him.

He doesn't even notice he's begun to distance himself from you; it happened instinctively. His nightly visits soon turned to every other night, to once a week, until he stopped showing up all together.

It wasn't like you could ask someone to check up on him, or else that would give away all the rendezvous you were having, so you really had no idea why he stopped coming to see you. All you know is that in his more recent visits before he disappeared, he seemed so much more...sad. He clung to you tighter, his voice cracked like he was going to cry, but the tears never fell, and his responses were much more vague, whereas before he would tell you all sorts of stories in great detail about his adventures on the open sea.

For a while, you thought he left your kingdom all together, without even saying goodbye. That soon proved to be false, however, when you overheard some guards talk about how they heard someone sneak into the people’s bank on the far side of your kingdom, and how they almost caught him, but were a few seconds too late.

So, not only was he ignoring you, he was getting sloppy with his work, meaning something had to be wrong with him, and you were determined to find out what.

When the moon rises the following night, and the kingdom is asleep, you put your plan into action. Waiting until just after a set of footsteps passes your door, since there’s usually a large gap of time between each person passing, you step out onto the terrace and start climbing down the same way you had watched your lover do many times before. It definitely took a lot longer than he would take, too scared of falling and getting gravely injured to go any faster, but eventually you made it to the cold, grassy ground underneath. Pulling the hood of your cloak over your head, you made a break for the treeline that separated the castle from the ocean. After a short run through the miniature forest, the sound of waves crashing against the rocks and sand reaches your ears, soon followed by the ocean coming into view. Though there were many ships at the pier, it was easy to tell which one was Scaramouche’s, his being the only pirate ship in a swarm of those meant for business only.

The crew members on night watch easily picked up your presence as you approached, as any cloaked figure nearing the ship would be suspicious and hard to miss. Though you hadn’t met most of them before, you could tell the man staring down at you from the edge of the ship was Xiao. Scaramouche had described him before, and said he was the only crew member with tattoos.

He was observant and knew who you were as well, staring down at you with an unblinking and piercing glare.

“I know why you’re here, but if I let you on, you won’t like what you’ll see,” he warned, and a loud thud coming from the ship drew your attention away from his face. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that it was Scaramouche making that noise.

You look back at Xiao with a determination on your face, your own glare matching his own. He sighs, turning his back to you and lowering the gangway for you to climb on. Walking on the ship without Scaramouche right next to you is definitely a different experience, and one you are not happy about.

Xiao watches as you approach the captain’s cabin, before walking away, not wanting to invade at a moment that should be private.

The thudding you heard earlier only gets louder as you approach the door to Scaramouche’s quarters. You knock softly, barely audible, and there’s no answer, so you assume he didn’t hear you.

You’re cautious as you open the door, peeking your head inside. Scaramouche is there, standing over his desk with his hands gripping the wood so tightly that his knuckles were turning white. Crumbled pieces of paper were scattered across the floor, his bottle of ink thrown across the room as well as his hat. Everything was shoved off of his desk as well, as if knocked off in one fell swoop, and many other things were thrown around in anger, making a mess of his usually neat room.

“Did I say you could come in?” Scaramouche seethes, looking up with such fury in his eyes, it had you scared. He didn’t seem to realize it was you until after he said those words with such a bitter tone. When his eyes lay on you, they soften just a bit and a look of regret washes over him. He never wanted you to see this side of him - the angry and harsh side he only showed to his enemies or his crew when he was really upset.

“You..” he starts, sighing and dropping his head to avoid looking at your fear-stricken face. “What are you doing here?”

“Did you really think you could disappear and I wouldn’t notice?” You responded, shifting awkwardly where you stood, still behind the door.

“Can I…come in?”

Scaramouche runs a hand down his face, shaking his head at his own foolishness. It was clear you were trying your best not to upset him more, and that only made him feel worse.

“Yes, yes, of course, get in here.”

At his words, you cautiously step inside his room, closing the door behind you softly. Still, you were barely inside, hanging by the door and attempting not to overstep. Scaramouche sighs once more, moving away from his desk and sitting down on his bed, head in his hands. “Sit.”

Though it’s true he was a man of few words, how little he was saying made you anxious. You sat down on the bed, keeping a few feet of space between your bodies.

“So what happened, dearest?” You asked him, breaking the silence that had grown between you.

“Nothing, I was just writing, that’s all.”

“Just writing?” You looked at him incredulously, glancing at all of the papers and the ink bottle spilling on the floor. “What were you writing that could have possibly made you so angry?”

“It’s not necessarily what I was writing, more so that I couldn’t explain everything the way I wanted to,” he responded, and true to his deceptive nature, you could tell he was only telling half-truths. It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the whole story.

“I’m sure it’s not so bad, let me see,” you say, leaning down and picking up a crumpled paper from the floorboards, unraveling it in your hands.

“No! Don’t read that!”

Scaramouche snatches the paper from your fingertips, but it was too late. You had already seen the most important part.

“You were going to leave? And you were going to tell me through some letter instead of coming to see me?”

Scaramouche sits in silence, tonguing his cheek as he looks away from you, crushing the paper once more in his hands. It took him a while to form words, and for a second you thought he simply wasn’t going to answer. He closes his eyes, taking a deep breath before, finally, he speaks.

“It’s for the best…that way you can finally marry someone like your father wants who would treat you way better than I.” Again, he doesn’t say the whole truth, but growing up with a dismissive father and a mother who never spoke up, you have learned to read between the lines.

“You don’t think you’re enough for me, do you? Is that what this is?”

His silence answers your question for you, and the fact that he couldn’t face you only enforced that fact. You scoot closer to him, closing the distance that separated you two. One of your hands rests on his shoulder while the other cups his cheek, turning his head to look at you. His face was tinted red and tears welled in his eyes. You decide not to point that out though, as to not ruin how far you had gotten to being able to comfort him. When it came to emotions, Scaramouche was difficult, to say the least, so the fact that he was almost crying around you was a big step.

“I don’t want some pompous prince or a rich man’s son; I want you.”

He simply clicks his tongue at this, rolling his eyes. He takes hold of the hand that holds his face and removes it, simply planning to let go afterwards, but you intertwine your fingers instead. When comforting a man that’s as emotionally constipated as Scaramouche is, persistence is key after all.

“Dearest, if you weren’t enough for me, I wouldn’t be with you despite the universe being against us or sneaking out of the castle to come see you. I only want you, so stop being an idiot and avoiding me!” You tried to reason with him.

He simply drops his head once more, and you lean your forehead against his. He bites his lip, holding back a smile as you insult him in this situation.“Alright, I get it, now drop it please.”

A small chuckle escapes you, and once again you hold his cheek in your hand. His eyes look up, meeting your own, and you can see the relief flooding through him.

“Are you still going to leave?” You whisper, and Scaramouche shakes his head.

“Not yet, though you know I will have to eventually? A man like me can’t stay in one place for long.”

“We’ll figure that out when the time comes, but for now, can I stay with you?”

Scaramouche doesn’t answer; he simply leans forward and presses his lips against your own. The hand that holds onto yours tightens as he pulls you even closer, turning his body to face you even more. His other hand holds onto your waist, thumb caressing you over your shirt. He’s smiling as he kisses you, each movement filled with more and more longing than the last. Even without words being spoken, you can feel how much he’s missed you these past couple of weeks. He’ll allow himself to taint you with his hands that have committed countless sins just this once, and be selfish with you, because who knows how long it will be until his hands can’t hold you anymore.

#pirate!scara #genshin impact #genshin #genshin fluff #wanderer #wanderer x reader #wanderer genshin #genshin x reader #genshin drabble #scaramouche fluff #scaramouche x reader #scara x reader #scaramouche #genshin wanderer #scaramouche angst #wanderer angst #genshin angst

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gothamslostboy · 5 months

Text

Marko W/ A Werewolf Mate

DAVID MICHAEL PAUL DWAYNE

A/N: I FINALLY DID IT! Here’s the final part to the lost boys with a werewolf s/o series. This started last year when I made Paul’s post, and I really didn’t expect me to take so long finishing this💀 sorry to all my marko lovers that his took almost a full year to complete and enjoy:]

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Marko finds you while strolling the boardwalk

He had separated from the boys in order to steal pick up some new paints

He’s a little disappointed that you’re a werewolf for 3 reasons

He thinks the idea of turning his mate and “corrupting” them is pretty hot

It’s easier to understand his mate’s emotions and feelings if they are eventually the same species as him

He’s been told since the day he was turned that werewolves hate vampires and now he’s scared you’ll reject him for it

But he doesn’t let it stop him from overall being excited about finding you

It’s been a couple decades since he got a new mate and he’s extremely curious what your personality is like

Will you be like any of his current mates? Or maybe something entirely new?

Marko’s mainly just hoping for someone who can keep up with his shananigans

Pauls fun to cause mayhem with but he’s also clumsy as fuck and normally they end up kicked off the boardwalk

At least until they can eat the guard who bands them

While Marko is still thinking of all the possibilities, you manage to catch his scent

Immediately you start running towards him

He notices you and starts to greet you

But Paul caught your scent, and wanted to protect his boy

He ends up tackling you into an alley and holding you down

Paul keeps asking you why you were trying to attack Marko but doesn’t trust you when you say he’s your mate

Well at least until Marko throws him off of you

It’s safe to say it wasn’t the first meeting either of you expected

But once everything got sorted out, and Paul gave an embarrassed apology, it ended up okay

Paul left to tell David and Dwayne what was going on, so you and Marko got to talking

He asked you to help him get the paints, and with the extra help, he also got a new sketchbook and some markers

With your supernatural speeds the two of you manage to out run the security guards and end up hiding under the dock, huddling together in order to avoid being seen through the cracks

He looks at you and breaks out into laughter, as quiet as he could, until you can’t contain your own laughter

Both of you whisper about the successful haul, until the giggles naturally die off

Staring at each other without speaking, you take in the other’s scents again

After the moment passes Marko has an idea

He smirks quickly before stuffing the stuff into his “shopping” bag and pulling you by the hand

Together you flee the boardwalk and don’t stop until you’re about 50 ft into the woods near the cave

You ask him what he’s doing and he tells you to listen to the noises around

Focusing as hard as possible, you notice a couple things: rushing water from the creek, an owl on the hunt, various animals walking, and finally, a group of ppl laughing near a camp fire

He proposes a challenge, first one to get a kill gets to make the first move

You chuckle at the idea but end up agreeing, shifting into your wolf form and darting towards the group

Marko is a bit in awe of your transformation

He had never seen anything like it

He doesn’t let himself fixate on it for too long long bc he realizes that now you’ve had a head start

Going as fast as he can, Marko gets to the campsite just in time to see you pounce

“Fuck!” He lets out a playful sigh as he helps take out the group, making sure there isn’t any stragglers

He fakes annoyance as you shift back, gloating about your victory

Marko is about to respond when you lean in and kiss him

He pulls away after a few seconds and you guys spend the rest of the night joking and getting familiar, eventually going back to the cave and meeting the others

Date nights for you two tend to involve some kind of scheme or murder

You pretending to be a dog and luring ppl into the woods to kill, testing each others abilities and seeing who’s better at certain things, messing with the rest of the pack, etc.

Marko also loves to play fight, so thank god you both have advanced healing

The full moon tends to make you more playful and increase your sex drive, and Marko is more than okay with both of those things

The only time Marko is gentle with you is the night after a full moon, when you’re dazed and tired from the heightened emotions and sensations you experience

But he’s right back to his normal self as soon as your better

After a couple years he starts getting sad about your mortality, so you both go to Dwayne for help

He figures out the rituals and items you need, and you and Marko set off to complete them

If you thought Marko was a sadist before, well you’re in for a shock now that you’re not a risk of death

He likes to howl at the moon with you at night, even though he doesn’t fully understand why you like it so much

He wanted to know if you play fetch since he met you, but didn’t know if that was a rude question to ask or not

He goes to the boys for advice on how to ask you but David just gets up and asks you right then

Now it’s a game yall play as a group

After a hunt they take a limb and throw it as hard as they can

If Marko is trying to hide something from you, like a gift or a conversation, he tends to throw things in the opposite direction

Your instincts are to immediately go get it

After the 3rd or 4th toss you figure it out and manage to stop chasing it though

He also thinks it’s funny to jokingly call you “bad dog/good dog” at random times and laugh when you give him a dirty look and growl

Marko doesn’t think it’s as funny when you bury his things in retaliation

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