#i legit remembered the time from my childhood when i have my toy phones

[jaybug-jabbers]

I have moved to a new place, which means going through some very, very old boxes of mine. Here's some running commetary I did for some of it on Twitter

Photo 1: When I was a little lass, I used to buy these chapsticks called Lipsmackers. They came in a zillion different flavors. I used to bite them like candy. To be fair they really, really marketed them as if they were candy. They made many of the caps with a hole in them so you could wear the chapstick on a necklace chain for some reason (which I did).

Why do I still have them? Well when I got older and stopped eating these things, I still liked to use them like a normal human, but also just to smell them, they were very nice smelling. They. Do Not smell nice anymore but that is to be expected. It's been a while.

Anyway that's a very weird product from the past, the joy of collecting all the flavors and wearing them on a necklace was just as much a part of the process as actually using them, they made every single one a unique color and I think that was to appeal to Collectors. Like I got legit so excited when I went to the store and saw New flavors. And the glittery-colored ones were like cracking open a pack of cards to find a Foil, lol

Also, I discovered my Chocolate Milk chapstick has the last name of my childhood best friend in pernament marker, I fucking borrowed her chapstick and never gave it back, which is hilarious to me

Dr Pepper was the best flavor, for the record.

Photo 2: So while I was reminiscing about lip gloss, I discovered the company STILL EXISTS (I assumed they were long dead, as many fads of the 90s go). So I bought a new pack for old time's sake! They're . . . not as good smelling or as tasty as I remember them being, but they probably have changed the formula in the time span of a couple decades, to be fair.

Photo 3-4: I just wanted to say this is peak cell phone design and I miss it. I got to play Snakebar, feel like I was using a Star Trek TOS communicator, I didn't have the incredibly depressing Entire Internet with me 24/7, it actually fits into even women's pockets, it has physical buttons, I see no downsides here.

Photo 5-6: A selection of some of my Littlest Pet Shop collection from when I was a kiddo. They are vastly superior to modern Littlest Pet Shop toys, and it saddens me that kids won't get to enjoy sets like these anymore. Not only do these things actually look like animals, but the attention to detail is incredible and they are functional toys. The frogs can 'leap' with a catapault. The mice can navigate a maze with a cheese that has a magnet in it. The chamelion changes color in warm water. They all did things. And they all came with accessories (food, brushes, cat litter boxes, etc) and playsets.

Photo 7: Typical box of toys from my youth: Dinosaurs dragons bugs monster trucks lizards roaarrrrr oh also a polly pocket, Iguess. This was the duality of a tomgirl who also happened to like Very Small Cute Things. So pretty much my toys were either typical "boy's toys" or they were Cute and Small (Littlest Pet Shop, My Little Pony, Polly Pocket, etc). I didn't like dolls except I did some have Barbies as a VERY tiny tot, but it was because I loved Barbie's Tiny Plastic accessories (tiny plastic shoes, food, whatever) more than the actual dolls, lol

Photo 8: Holy shit you guys I loved Giga Pets so much as a kid. This is a selection of some of them. (Well actually one of the ones in the photo is a Nano Pet) Giga Pets were a very popular spinoff of the Tamagotchi craze. Sadly these Giga Pets have sat too long in storage and their screens are pretty much fried, despite the fact that they otherwise seem functional; but it won't do much good if I can't see them properly. (If I tilt the screen at a really intense angle I can make out the display sometimes) I liked Giga Pets more than Tamagotchi because the Giga Pets had way more features and interesting things to do, as well as a wide selection of animal types. Sadly they are no longer in production.

Fun story, the pink Giga Pet in that photo is a Koala. I kept one alive for 100 consecutive days one time. That's an incredibly long time for a Giga Pet. Once he turned 100, we had a birthday party for him with a cake and everything. Not long after that, he died because the batteries got too low. I felt very sad when he departed.

I used to wear these things on a chain around my neck and went everywhere with them. So I had like 3 or 4 of these things hanging off me quite a lot. Again, I was pretty intense with my hyperfixations even as a kid, and I had a strong Collector sort of craving. I had Digimon as well, btw! I enjoyed the battle aspect to them, as primitive as it was. I wonder where the rest of my virtual pet stash is.

Photo 9: The first home computer our family had, the reliable little Macintosh SE. SOMEHOW, when I got this thing out of storage and flipped the switch, it fucking booted up without any problems. I can't tell you how intensely wild that is, this thing is incredibly old and so many things can go wrong with its parts at this age.

A lot of fond memories with this thing. I spent a LOT of time with Hypercard, making my own stacks and games. Played a lot of the original Manhole too. I know for a lot of folks, their first home computer was an Atari, but I grew up with Macs. Back then they were actually wonderful machines, though modern Mac products now leave much to be desired.

That's all for now for the Nostalgia hype.

#nostalgia #long post #mycontent

[simminglytimeladies]

Ah, to have your phone set to have the same ringtone as Chinese toy phone ringtone

#txt #rambles #bleppingrl #i legit remembered the time from my childhood when i have my toy phones #i was a obvilious kid back then but for some reason it made me happy.

[toonbly]

4 and 6 for bideo games

6: A game that’s changed you the most?

OH MAN THERE’S A FEW.

honestly id have to name two: Pokemon Mystery Dungeon Explorers of Darkness and Pokemon Ranger Shadows of Almnia.

LIKE OKAY.

Mystery Dungeon was my first exposure to large narratives in video games. With all the emotional punches and plot twists and turns all over this thing with some of the BEST foreshadowing and character writing I’ve ever seen in a spin off Pokemon game, this is one of the things in my early childhood that got me really into storytelling. i remember specifically like, my first time doing written out prose was trying to make a novelization of mystery dungeon! i started making stories abt explorer teams with my toys and cards n stuff bc i was like 10 yknow what i mean HFKJDHFKSD

but then i also played Rangers: Shadow Of Almnia. this game was the reason i made my first ever comic! it was basically a comic version of the game but with my ranger OC Lola! she was also secretly a fairy whos parents were vaporeons but she WASN’T a pokemon ok she was a fairy and she has a deep seeded rivalry with darkrai who tries to kill her at some point but its fine.

yeah i was like 8 what do you want from me HJFJDSHFKDS

BUT LIKE LEGIT. THAT WAS MY FIRST EVER COMIC. I WOULD NOT BE MAKING FERRYMEN NOW IF IT WERENT FOR MY WEIRD MARY SUE RANGER FANFICTION I MADE WHENEVER I WAS IN LIKE? 2ND OR 3RD GRADE FHDJFHKSDJF

theyre the games that got me into stories!! and i wouldnt be where i am or who i am today without storytelling

4: Worst game you’ve ever played?

oh baby you already know its YIIK

I’M PUTTING THIS BIT UNDER A READ MORE BECAUSE GOOD LORD DO I HAVE A LOT TO SAY HERE FSJDKHFKJDSF

i bought the game to “give it a chance” sometime last year i think? bc like listen. listen. i only vaguely knew about the problems with it, i knew it had supposedly bad writing and the dialogue could be a little awkward. that was it. i took a look at it and tbh i liked the visual style! like

i genuinely like the art style for the talk sprites! and i get the vibe theyre going with the low poly models and the very bright colors, its supposed to be very 90s-esque!

it does kinda feel like its missing that little Spark that really ties it all together? its missing a little pizzazz to make it really stand out and REALLY get the vibe its going for, it misses the uniqueness mark but! it does its job okay enough for me to get what its going for!

plus honestly i found the intro sequence with the crow asking you questions really charming! in full context of the actual shitshow i was about to get into it was a little tryhard-y, but i liked it when i first saw it!

so i figured hey, what the heck, i’ll give this thing a try. the intros cute and i like the art style, maybe people are giving it too much flack.

and then. and then alex picks up that first phone call.

AND IT GOES. SO DOWNHILL. FUCKING IMMEDIATELY

LIKE OKAY. THE GAMEPLAY IS SO BAD AND REPETIVE AND GENUINELY BROKEN. im no game design expert so i cant really explain why, but combat in yiik DRAGS ON so much that its GENUINELY fucking draining. no joke while trying to complete this game i had to put it down multiple times bc it made me dissasociate. i WISH i was joking. i WISH that was exaggeration. it isnt. it is far fucking from it.

AND LOOK USUALLY. USUALLY. I CAN PUT UP WITH MEDIOCRE OR EVEN TERRIBLE GAMEPLAY IF THE STORY IS GOOD.

BUT THE STORY ISN’T FUCKING GOOD. ITS AWFUL.

it’s somehow both over explained and absolutely fucking nonsensical, characters will repeat themselves THOUSANDS OF TIMES in these long, repetive exposistion dumps that explain every single detail while making sure you understand NONE of it. the characters are unlikable (ESPECIALLY alex, the main character), it’s tone death and insensitive, and it’s just so. fucking. pretentious.

there are other issues in the game like racism, sexism, insensitity towards very serious topics (like using the real life death of Elisa Lam for shock value. no thats not a joke. the devs themselves have admitted this was intentional.)

not to mention all the shit the devs have done which we dont have TIME to get into-- LONG STORY SHORT YIIK IS A MASSIVE FUCKING SHITSHOW OF A GAME AND DON’T WASTE YOUR MONEY ON IT LIKE I DID. i WISH steam would let me refund it. my brains gonna explode.

i think the devs owe me compensation for damages. just damages in general. /j

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #347

“lay your head down, child  /  i won’t let the bogeyman come  /  count the bodies like sheep to the rhythm of the war drums”

Have you ever watched a whole hour long infomercial? Ha, Girt and I have one day when he was hanging out. It was about a vacuum, to be precise. Do you tend to cave into peer pressure? No. Do you think it's attractive for a man to wear eyeliner? Yeah. Are you listening to music currently? Yeah, it's this version of Manson's "Lunchbox" that I hadn't heard before. Have you ever done something you once thought you'd be too chicken to do? Yeah, like going on this one ride at a fair. Y'know, the kind that slowly brings you way up and abruptly drops you. What's your relationship to the child you’re around most? They're my nieces and nephew. Have you ever had an illegal substance in your blood stream? No. What is the worst thing that has ever happened to your hair? More than once, back when I had long hair, it would get so knotted from neglect that I'd brush out just... giant clumps of hair. The joys of depression, right? It's honestly part of the reason I cut it all off, and it's something I seriously recommend for people who struggle with brushing their hair. What do you think about cats? I adore them. Who do you want with you when you're afraid? Absolutely my mom. Who might as well just be your sibling? Ha, Sara. We're just so remarkably similar, and even when we first met in person, we clicked like it was nothing. Would you ever consider working for the government? No; I'm not working with corrupt, lying motherfuckers. What is the weirdest thing you have ever witnessed a sibling doing? Well, your sister "sleepwalking" or whatever she was actually doing and grabbing a knife she'd hidden under her mattress to creep towards her then-boyfriend was beyond just "weird." Your first best friend's name? Brianna. How do you act when you're uncomfortable? "Anxious, impatient, and fidgety." <<<< Same. It's very obvious I want to get out of the situation. What bug would you like to be extinct? Do wasps do like... anything for the environment? I don't want to give a definite answer here that ends up being ignorant, because I appreciate bugs that are even just a regular food source for more vital creatures like spiders, but I don't know a damn thing wasps do that are beneficial. They just kill bees, from what I know. Do you know anyone other than a cop who has ever owned a cop car? No. Have you ever felt fire? I mean, I've never directly touched fire, no. What would you do if your first love asked you back out? I REALLY DON'T WANT TO PICTURE THIS. Do you know anyone that is a lesbian? Yeah. What are your thoughts on roleplaying games? I think they're fun. Do you want to have a bachelor/bachelorette party before you get married? So, true story, I don't even know what those entail exactly. But considering how few friends I have, I probably wouldn't. Ever been texted by mistake and played along & acted like you knew them? No. Would you ever get a name tattooed on you? Noooo sir. Do your parents dress like they’re years younger? Does it gross you out? They don't, but it wouldn't gross me out...? They can dress however they damn well please. Obsession from childhood? Dinosaurs and Spyro probably top the list. Favorite activity to do in warm weather? Just swim, really. I hate warm weather. Favorite activity to do in cold weather? If there's snow, take pictures. If it's just cold, then I like to just stay inside and bundle up in bed. Five songs to describe you? I don't know five, but I know a few I resonate with: "Get Up" by Mother Mother, "That's What You Get" by Paramore, uhhh then idk. Best way for someone to bond with you? Hm. Probably just like... talk about life, like our stories and things we've been through, both good and bad. Just being mutually vulnerable makes me feel connected to people. I like bonding via music, too, and I find it pretty exciting to share songs and, once again, go deeper and share what they mean to you, etc. etc. In summary, I just like getting to know a person at their core. What is the first meme you remember seeing? Hell if I know. Lemonade or tea? Lemonade, by a landslide. Sci-fi, fantasy, or superheroes? Fantasy. Favorite type of cheese? American. If you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? I relate very deeply to Henry Townshend from SH4 with saying "what the hell?" about literally everything. If you were an anime character, what genre of anime would it be? I'unno. Character you relate to? Since watching a playthrough of the game the first time, I've related to Max Caulfield from Life is Strange very deeply. An awkward photographer that cares a lot for people. Favorite website from your childhood? Webkinz. Least favorite flavor of food or drink? Grape, usually. Or orange. Favorite potato food? French fries. PC or console gaming? I prefer console games. Writing or drawing? Shit man, why you gotta make me choose? I feel much more satisfaction after drawing something I'm proud of, but I write way more. Who would you put before everyone else? My mom. How many phone numbers do you have memorized? Literally none. Do you get motion sickness? No. Have you ever been on a cruise? No. Have you ever bailed a friend out of jail? No. Have you ever won anything from a radio station? No. What do you do when you go to the beach? Swim for a while and then sit under the tent or whatever we brought and think about how ready I am to go home and get out of the heat. How many pillows are on your bed? Two. Do you like pickles? Yeah. Do you like camping? I've never been *legit* camping; Dad would just sometimes set up the tent in the yard and he and my sisters and I would sleep out there. I LOVED that as a kiddo. I think I'd enjoy like, one night of actual camping, so long as I have my camera and phone. My technology dependence would probably get me by Day #2, lol. Have you ever ridden a motorcycle? No, and I don't plan to. Wrecking in one of those can fuck you the hell up. Even with a helmet, just honestly, it seems... pretty stupid to put yourself at THAT incredible a risk. Have you ever had plastic surgery? No. Were you ever sent to the principal’s office as a kid? I don't think so... but maybe once? I have this super faint memory of being in the office, but maybe I was bringing them something from my teacher? That sounds about right. Have you ever used a slingshot? No. Have you ever driven an electric car? No. Do you live in an area that is prone to tornadoes? They happen here, but I wouldn't say we're "prone" to them. We get tornado watches/warnings a lot when we have summer storms, but it's seldom they actually occur, and it's even rarer for them to be noteworthy at all. What breed was the last dog you saw? One of our neighbors has a German Shepherd she walks a lot. How long have your parents been together (or how long were they together, if they no longer are): I wanna say around or over 20 years? I don't know. What 5 words best describe your mother’s personality? Loving, welcoming, resilient, selfless, and strong. Do you know any transgender people? Yes. Have you ever had a parrot sit on your shoulder? No, but that'd be cool. In the morning, do you eat breakfast first or brush your teeth first? I eat first. What’s something you’ve been struggling with lately? A number of things, but my weight's the real problem right now. All the weight loss progress I once made has almost been entirely erased... and I'm extremely, extremely upset about it. I'd rather move onto the next question than elaborate on this bullshit. Do you carry condoms? No, I don't have a reason to. Would you date someone with braces? Yes. Do you think people look up to you? God no. How often do you have trouble sleeping at night? Pretty much every night. Any vacations planned? No. We've never been able to afford vacations. Who were you last in a car with? My mom. Did you ever watch Sailor Moon? Yeah. My older sister was ooooobsessed. She even had the little toy wand and would dance to the theme when it came on. What do you want for Christmas? Well, it's rather early to think of that, but if I had to pull out an answer right now, it'd probably be either Venus' new terrarium (if I don't already have it) or supplies for it. If by some miracle I've been able to get everything I wanted for it by then, I would seriously love a hognose snake. If you had to get glasses would you wear contacts? I've worn glasses for many years, and I can live with it. I'd prefer contacts so I can get an undereye dermal piercing, but they're just too tedious for me. Best party you’ve ever been to? Maybe a big party my friend Summer had for one of her birthdays many years ago. We played lots of games like darts and stuff while listening to good music and just hanging out. Have you ever been surfing? I have not. Are you thinking about asking anyone out? No. Pink lemonade or regular lemonade? Pink. Chocolate or strawberry milk? Chocolate, for sure. I hate strawberry milk. Are you subscribed to a lot of channels on YouTube? Oh yes. Do you wish you had a better phone? Yeah. I mean, my phone is fine, but I particularly dislike the poor camera quality. Do you find texting fun? I'm officially becoming an old woman in that I don't really like texting anymore, but only because I make way too many typos. I would much rather type via an actual keyboard. Do you have any friends who have had twins? No. Do you have any past mistakes you’ve made that haunt you every day? Yes. Seriously. Are you bothered by something someone said to you years ago? Things especially Bryar and Colleen have said to me are probably going to die with me.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''pet'' by a perfect circle

[cat-scarr]

Omg! I just watched the B10:AF ep “Veeedle, Vreedle” and I now see what your talking about with Julie! I mean, I always believed you, but now I am seeing it with my own eyes! I haven’t watched Ben 10 in some, just recently started to rewatch it (found you blog and I love it!), and I always remembered feeling weird about their (Ben & Julie) relationship. I didn’t remember this ep I rewatched it and I notices something. (1) when the Vreedles come to repo, Ship is on the offensive & starts morphing

into weapons. Julie tells Ship “I don’t want them to see how valuable you are” and instead calls Ben(who comes with in seconds!!) (2) when with Gwen and Kevin, they find out the court order is legit, Ben says “somebody can use him [Ship] as a weapon” Gwen: “AND you DON’T want Julie to LOSE her pet EITHER, right BEN?” Ben passively says he agrees and Julie calls him out on it not being sincere 

(3) Julie ask Gwen would Ben care if Ship was “just a dog, my [Julie] dog” (4) When Ben & Kevin comes back from court Julie is happy b/c Ben went “halfway across the galaxy” for her. But when Ben tells her that he feels, in light of all of this, that Julie is putting a lot of pressure on their relationship, Kevin tells him “it’s just a dog”. Like people Ship is not a dog! Ship is a sentient Mechamorph! You perceive it to act like a dog! Is there even dogs in space?!

Julie starts the episode saying that Ship is powerful, latter saying the same thing to Gwen, but once Ben says the exact same thing that she says, all of a sudden it’s wrong. I’m with Ben, that thing can kill you, your family, or anyone at any given time! Ship, though friendly, it’s not a toy or pet. Ship is like owning a gun; it’s cool and you can take it to the shooting range for “fun” BUT it doesn’t take away how deadly it is.

Gwen & Kevin might be so relaxed b/c they have seen and can handle things like this. But Julie hasn’t, she literally had to call Ben for help b/c she couldn’t protect herself! And what if he couldn’t answer his phone?! But lucky for Julie he comes on time to help, but after that Julie questions if Ben cares about ship. Girl, he cares about you and Ship on two different levels. Even if Ship was a dog, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t go out his way unless it was important.

Julie is important to Ben & Ship is important to Julie, therefore Ship is important to Ben. But again you can’t ignore how dangerous Ship is, or the potential to be. But the worst thing is Ben opened the conversation about what he feels in the relationship, but Julie looks offended and Kevin dismisses Ben. If anyone says they feel pressure in a relationship, THATS SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT! Your partner should feel safe & comfortable with you not pressure.

His grievances are dismissed but when Julie got a problem, she’ll raise hell for Ben. And note that this is in the beginning of their relationship and latter Ben doesn’t start these types of conversations anymore, he is mostly reacting or apologizing (to my memory, still rewatching). And I’m surprise that Gwen, of all people, doesn’t have Ben’s back more often. In OS when Kai was first introduced, I remember Gwen sticking up for Ben when he was treated unfairly. Seeing this, I personally think Ben stayed in the relationship b/c he’s lonely & wants intimacy with someone. It used to be Grandpa Max & Gwen, but they now have lives and responsibilities outside of Ben. Often times people who are lonely overindulge in intimacy, i.e always wanting to be around people no matter how long & if it’s good or bad . Some who are quick to romantic relations often do it b/c it’s a quick way to companionship.

I’m not saying Ben doesn’t love Julie, I’m saying is that he emotionally needs Julie more that what she knows and what she can give him. It’s funny how in OV when Rook and Ben become friends, girls start throwing themselves at Ben but he doesn’t care. Julie is traveling and he doesn’t freak out, instead believes the best and let her do her thing. Why? B/c he has Rook, he has a friend that will never leave his side. He finally gets that companion & intimacy he wanted. 

Therefore, no longer NEEDING to hold onto or pursue romantic relations. Instead he’s free to get a gf when he wants one. It’s sad b/c Ben is a empathetic guy, he is so open hearted, kind, forgiving, lighthearted, & trustworthy but people see that as a flaw. Ben will fight for you however you need it, at any cost, but rarely is it returned. He can’t afford to feel bad, to be anything less than Ben 10/10. 

I personally think, within story, Ben deserved better romantic partners or should just stay single. The girls say they given more than they get, but they should know who they’re dating. He couldn’t stop being a hero if he tried, b/c it’s who he is! He’s not dumb, he’ll make “gf time”, but he also needs “me time”. He’ll do what they want, but to do what he wants they’re reluctant or wants something out of it *cough* the D *cough*. It seems like they all are in love with

—————————————————————-

Yes!! I’m so glad people are noticing!

First, the “dog” situation…SHIP IS NOT A DOG. Just because he is seemingly programmed to mimic an earth dog, doesn’t make him any less a weapon. It’s the equivalent of having a machine gun painted pink. Cute, but still deadly.

Ben is right to see Ship for what he is, and in doing so, it proves that he cares about Julie because he cares that she’s in possession of what could be highly dangerous alien weaponry.

Why does he need to go half way across the universe for her to see that??

Is he supposed to just agree with her delusion? Okay, “delusion” might be a little harsh, but he’s had so much experience with dangerous alien technology, even being able to become a Galvanic Mechamorph himself because of the potentially dangerous alien technology literally on his wrist, that he would know what he’s talking about. She doesn’t even know the half of it at this point!

Why does she not care that he’s looking out for her?? How does that make him a bad boyfriend? Just because he disagrees with her?

Who wouldn't feel under pressure when this is a problem very early into your relationship?

Part of me just thinks that they’re reading him wrong. Maybe it should be obvious that Ben saying “I think Ship could be used as a weapon” would translate to “I care about Julie’s safety”, but to her it seems to not have been so clear, unfortunately. 

Similarly, I hear a lot of people talk about how much of a problem Ben’s “attitude” is when debating things in relation to this pairing. Although this is probably more common when discussing Ultimate Alien. 

But honestly? If you don’t like someone’s attitude, why would you stay in a relationship with them?

Are relationships for changing your partner to suit your own preferences? And if their own opinions and perspectives don’t line up with yours, even if they’re right, does that make them a bad partner? 

Flaws are subjective. Clearly what these characters thought was ‘bad’ about Ben, we see the good in. 

He is not fundamentally a terrible boyfriend. 

It’s interesting that you say Ben chose to stay in the relationship due to feelings of loneliness and longing for intimacy that he was lacking. I have my own particular issues with Rook, but, for the most part, I’m willing to slightly overlook those flaws because I’m glad he was there for Ben when he needed someone during the beginning of Omniverse. But that really makes it clear why he stuck around.

I hate when people argue that he was neglectful and ignorant towards her, which is what made her leave. Or, more accurately, “ghost him.” 

I don’t recall anyone in “Rules of Engagement” ever definitively saying that it had been months between the last time Ben and Julie spoke. 

Ben is sixteen in both Ultimate Alien and Omniverse, apparently. If that is true, SO MUCH HAPPENS THAT YEAR! He gains fame, takes down his childhood hero (Captain Nemesis), deals with Ultimate Kevin and Aggregor, deals with the Forever Knights becoming increasingly more violent, defeats Vilgax and Dagon with Ascalon, loses his old team, becomes friends with Rook. deals with Khyber hunting him down, has old wounds ripped open and faces off Malware, gets kicked off the planet while the Incuseans enslave Earth before coming back to save everyone…and that’s not even the whole show! 

They had a falling out between Ben defeating Vilgax and Dagon, and the frog war. Compared to how many events can fit into a year of his life. that couldn’t have been an extremely long time. Two months, maximum. 

But more importantly, he must have been so overwhelmed. It’s so unfortunate that he feels like he can’t express that in fear of people not seeing him as the strong, unbreakable hero he is always expected to be. 

Overall, I definitely agree that he deserved better than what he got. And I could be petty and plug my own self insert oc who I ship with him (and do it right lol) but I’ll save it. Thank you for letting me know my words make a difference!

#ask #long post #wow this turned into an essay #but I shouldn't be surprised lol #anyway if you do care about my oc...check my deviantart ;3 #link in bio #benlie #ben 10 #ben 10 alien force #ben 10 ultimate alien #ben 10 omniverse #ben tennyson #julie yamamoto #benxjulie #essay files

[cuddliestbear]

So, I have audible and I use it like all the time. Its not that I don't like just reading books but I don't have the time anymore. I'm always doing one thing or another and don't usually have the time to just sit down and read. At work, in between phone calls I have my headphones in listening to the narrators tell their stories and type away at my keyboard. At home, I will listen while doing chores, or cooking, feeding and cleaning my animals, etc.

I have just used one of my credits to get 'The Silver Eyes' audiobook by Scott Cawthon and some other lady I don't feel like looking up right now. And I've heard about it, I've played FNAF, I've watched countless videos on Game Theorists, Markiplier, Jacksepticeye, NateWantstoBattle and other channels about this game.

I'm only on Chapter 7, and holy shit. I obviously know it's a horror/thriller novel, and it's going to have some thing or another to do with creepy animatronics and missing kids, but just...I guess I wasn't expecting this much? I think this book is canon, too. Like a part of whatever convoluted story is all behind the franchise.

There are spoilers ahead if you wanted to read or listen to the book yourself. You have been warned.

So, there's Charlie, for the most part, she's the main character. I don't remember if her last name was mentioned or not. She's come back to this town of Hurricane to attend a sort of memorial/scholarship giveaway in the memory of her childhood friend Michael. Who was one of the five kidnapped and missing children. and then the story goes on from there.

I just wanna note a few things I have noticed in association with the games.

First the five missing kids. We all know the suspected backstory to the first game. Five kids were kidnapped and killed then stuffed into the animatronic suits. So, that was...interesting.

Then, Charlie's childhood home...I could be wrong but for some reason it gave me serious Fnaf 4 vibes and I'm not sure how accurate that is.

The creepy thing that was in the corner of her father's workshop where he built the animatronics. It sounded kind of like an exoskeleton, and the design reminded me of Ennard, from FNAF 5. But then she made the realization that that exoskeleton was put into the Foxy suit, so it didn't add up anymore. But who knows.

The yellow bunny. Before FnafVr came out it wouldn't have meant much to me other than just the creepy guise the killer used to capture not only those five kids but also Charlie's twin brother Sammy when they were toddlers at the Fazbear Family Diner. It reminds me HEAVILY of Glitchtrap, and I don't think that is a coincidence.

Evidently, Charlie's father started the whole Fazbear franchise. The Diner, then the pizzeria, and the others as well. I have no idea about fnaf 3 or 2 or five, but there are strong connections to at least 1, 4 and the fnavr game

The Freddy Fazbear's Pizza is described to be the same one from the first game, suggesting that during the timeline, that game came before the events of the book, but after the children's kidnappings and murders.

Dave, this "security guard" is def the same dude who wore the yellow spring Bonnie suit to kidnap and kill those kids, but Dave could just be an alias. He's a relatively new character to me still because he was only introduced a chapter or two ago.

Same topic but a little less observational of the story.

I obviously know that bad shit gonna happen because the book is centered around fnaf and knowing fnaf something bad always happens.

If ANYTHING happens to Jason, I will literally kill everyone then myself. Because he is a young child and Fazbear Entertainment and children are not a good combo, bad shit happens.

Charlie, though she is the main character is kind of weird to me because she literally grew up in a room of animatronic like toys. And I do NOT gel with that shit at all. I hate hate hate hate hate freaking animatronics and have long before fnaf was a thing. Charlie was unnatural in her fondness of them and I do not trust those who are not at least wary of things that act alive but aren't.

Jessica's character may just be written this way on purpose but I kind of wanna introduce her face to a brick repeatedly. I don't like her much.

Marla is almost as bad but not in the same way. I wouldn't smack her with a brick but maybe my hand. Who in their right mind as an older sibling would let their younger brother or any younger sibling into an abandoned building where one of their friends had been kidnapped and never seen again???? Like this bitch needs a slap hard across the face for even allowing that shit. What kind of big sister are you to bring your kid brother into possible danger like that?

Then, Charlie again, this bitch legit got attacked by foxy on her second outing to this boarded up and hidden old janky place and decided it would be okay to go back???? With some sketchy dude named Dave???? Sure her friends were with her, but the bitch literally showed them all he knew a fuck ton more about that pizzeria and the operation of those animatronics than any rando property security guard ought to, and they didn't nope the fuck out and all leave?

Then, THEN. One of their friends gets fucking kidnapped right the fuck in front of Jason by Dave dressed in the Spring Bonnie suit and since Jason is apparently too fucking stupid to say that the Bonnie was yellow, Charlie nor John caught on even though both of them would have known what that fucking meant!!!!! Like Jason, my dude, I love ya, ur a cute fuckin kid, but descriptions are fucking important. You are 11, you are smart enough to figure that out.

Also, then Carlton's dad, a police officer just kind of invites them over for cocoa and claims Carlton is pulling a trick on them and will show up. Um bitch no. You're son is probs dead, and you are not even helping to find who is responsible right now. All you're worried about is that the door was chained and the kids couldn't have gotten in. Did it occur to you or your dumb as bricks co-officer Dunn that maybe just fuckin maybe the chains were put on in between the kids leaving to get help and you all coming back? Maybe like idk the kidnapper didn't want you to follow him or interrupt whatever sick and twisted things he's doing?

Anyways, I think that's it for now. I'm going to listen to more and hopefully not fucking give myself nightmares. Wish me luck.

#books #audiobook #ranting #review kind of #fnaf #the silver eyes #spoilers #fnaf spoilers #silver eyes spoilers #i fucking hate animatronics #literally just burn down fazbears #seriously

[whaleyoufeedmenuggets]

Im too lazy to look at the questions so DO ALL OF THEM. (if you dont wanna then go on a random number generator and get 5 random numbers)

ITS REALLY LONG BUT I DID IT KJSHADJS HERE GOES i love oversharing my lifealso im putting a read more line bc its hella long

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

water bottles

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

ehhh depends on my mood. i’d say it’s (dark) chocolate most of the time (love that 70% dark chocolate mmMmMm)

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

cotton candy!! except when it gets all over my face and hair o no

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

common report book comments included

- very active

- bright

- “the live wire of the class”

- usually distracted but still does well

- mischievous

- playful

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

bottles so that i can close it and save the rest for later and not have to chug it yeet

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

sportswear #sweatpantsalldayeveryday

7. earbuds or headphones?

def headphones but they’re inconvenient sometimes :/

8. movies or tv shows?

tv shows!! (also, my adhd ass can’t get through a movie without zoning out oops)

9. favorite smell in the summer?

i haven’t experienced /real/ summer (thank u singapore’s tropical climate) but i rly like the smell of rain :”)

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

making up excuses to skip pe

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

belvitas before morning practice

croissant sandwich and chocolate milk after practice

if there’s no practice, then scrambled eggs from the dining hall lolol

if i’m too lazy to go to the dining hall, then cereal

12. name of your favorite playlist?

it’s literally called jams and the description is “a clusterfuck of stuff i’ve jammed to at some point”

13. lanyard or key ring?

key ring

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

gummy bears/sour patch kids

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

death of a salesman - arthur miller

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

with one foot up on the chair and the other leg sitting normally

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

a pair of asics sneakers

18. ideal weather?

15ºc/60ºf when its like cool but not too cold but also not ridiculously hot and also when theres no insane wind (a light breeze is fine)

19. sleeping position?

on my left side and hugging a pillow/bolster/soft toy

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

i like the feeling of pen and paper but im disorganized as hell so an apple pencil + ipad makes a good enough substitute

21. obsession from childhood?

frogs (i’ve loved them since i was 3 hehe)

22. role model?

a dude i used to train with for a while in 2014. he retired last year but he’s always looked out for me like an older brother since we trained together (he’s 8 years older than me lmao) and even thought i’m so far away rn he still checks in on me and stuff and idk he’s probably one of the swimmers i respect the most.

23. strange habits?

i cant fall asleep at night if im not hugging something.  like. it could be a pillow. or a soft toy. literally anything. once on a school trip i hugged a pair of sweatpants to sleep bc i legit cant fall asleep if im not hugging something.i have no problem falling asleep in class/on buses/cars/planes though.

24. favorite crystal?

idk i never really paid enough attention to crystals to actually have a favorite and know their names. they’re all rly pretty tho.

25. first song you remember hearing?

uhh h h i honestly can’t remember. probably some classical music bc i played the violin and that was my first experience of music that i was actually aware of????

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

switch on the aircon and take a nap / sit in bed on netflix/playing on my nintendo switch. and swimming outdoors i guess.

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

switch on the heater and take a nap / sit in bed on netflix/playing on my nintendo switch.

do u see a pattern here

28. five songs to describe you?

jet lag - simple plan (bc time zones suck and i miss my fam & friends)

avalanche - bring me the horizon (pretty much sums up how tf my brain feels)

high hopes - p!atd

astronaut - simple plan

the reckless and the brave - all time low

29. best way to bond with you?

doing dumb shit with me

also Quality Time™️ like idk even if we’re chilling and doing our own shit i like just spending time with people im comfortable enough with

30. places that you find sacred?

idk

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

a hoodie and sweatpants

for no reason other than that’s what i wear 90% of the time

32. top five favorite vines?

I AM CONFUSION!!! AMERICA EXPLAIN

this bitch empty. yeet.

im in my mom’s car VROOM VROOM

the one of that dad playing the saxophone (???) and the kid slamming the oven door open and shut

road works ahead “haha yea sure hope it does!”

33. most used phrase in your phone?

either lmao or lolol or LMFAO or yeet

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

gOD i had spotify ads stuck in my head all the time before i switched to premium and now i cant remember any of them (thank god)

35. average time you fall asleep?

i’d say 12:30-1ish

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

the tROLL FACE MEME LIKE those rage faces idk what they’re called but BASICALLY THOSE 2010-2012 era memes

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

suitcase!!! i like sitting on them and yeeting myself around on them or getting people to push me around and then falling off

38. lemonade or tea?

lemonade

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

ngl i havent had either of them before

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

so in jc2 (aka 12th grade), for some reason PEOPLE WERE PUTTING PRE-PACKAGED HARD BOILED EGGS ALL OVER THE SCHOOL. like they were still in their wrappers and all but u could open ur schoolbag and find like 5 eggs in there. and no one knew where they came from. i think at one point there were even eggs hanging from the pull-up bars. all i know is that they were everywhere and people in my batch still remember it as the egg invasion of acjc.

41. last person you texted?

my mom

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

def jacket!!! especially when they have zips hehe

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

hoodie

44. favorite scent for soap?

idk man depends on my mood

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

sci-fi bc im a fricken nerd

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

shirt and sweats

47. favorite type of cheese?

cheddarrr also i like mozzerrella sticks

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

a fineapple B)

lmao jk ummmm maybe a watermelon bc when u hit it it sounds hollow, just like how my skull would sound if someone hit it (h a)

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

here for a good time not for a long time

never give up without a fight

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

idk probably some dumb meme. i laugh at a lot of stuff like i laugh anything even mildly funny. some that i can think of off the top of my head are:

- i was tryna type ducky but typed fucky instead and sOmEOnE (could be the person who submitted this ask, idk tho) changed my facebook messenger nickname to fucky and the notification was like ”poopy butthole changed your nickname to fucky” and i think that’s still the funniest sentence i’ve read in my whole life

- one time we went to mcdonalds and a friend said mcfluffy instead of mcflurry and idk why but i laughed so hard at that

- once @doduo and i spent half a chinese lesson cutting out random faces from the chinese newspaper and sticking them randomly all over the classroom and idk. it was the funniest thing ever. until the teacher came over and confiscated my scissors rip.

51. current stresses?

- an essay draft (that i am procrastinating rn by doing this, oops)

- CANADIAN TRIALS (but thats a good kind of stress)

- submitting a proposal for a group project but none of my groupmates are freaking replying my texts ugh

52. favorite font?

avenir next!! i find san serif fonts way easier to read than serif lolol.i like helvetica neue too.

53. what is the current state of your hands?

dry af but also i just got my nails done so they pretty rn hehe

54. what did you learn from your first job?

i…havent had a real job yet

55. favorite fairy tale?

idk i was never rly one for fairy tales even as a kid.

56. favorite tradition?

chinese new year when we get CASH and we spend 3 days just eating junk yEET im rly sad im gonna be missing it the next few years tho

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

hh h h hh hhh hh hh they’re pretty personal i don’t /really/ wanna put it out here but i can text you the answer to this if you want (i’m perfectly fine with that!!)

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

- i think i’m pretty intuitive!!! i can guess anyone’s mbti if i’ve spent enough time with them/gotten a detailed enough description of them /winks/ and i can read people pretty well in general and i can draw links to themes/symbols in lit pretty well….???

- i’m somewhat decent at lettering…i think

- i’m good at pull-ups and also vertical jumps i’m secretly a froge

- i’m decent at photography…i guess….

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

yeet

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

pokemon !!

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

/sweats/ i’m not very good at remembering lines from books/movies/shows WELP

62. seven characters you relate to?

JAKE PERALTA - b99

rosa diaz - b99

linguine - ratatouille (he’s permanently confused and he let a ratto take over his job bc he had no idea what he was doing like damn what a big mood)

dory - finding nemo/finding dory (i relate to the forgetfulness)

percy jackson

kale bae /winks/

mitt (during bad phases) /winks again, but sadly/

63. five songs that would play in your club?

idek man i wouldnt even be at my own club i’d be at home taking a nap i’ll just ask someone else to handle my playlist

64. favorite website from your childhood?

club penguin !!!

65. any permanent scars?

yE one of them was from jumping onto a treadmill going at 13km/h 2 years ago bc i thought i was a good idea

66. favorite flower(s)?

i dont have any

67. good luck charms?

i eat pancakes for breakfast on meet days!!!! altho i think this is more of a habit than a good luck charm tbh lmao.

also i guess pip???? he’s my emotional support narwhal :’)

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

durian. i cant stand the stuff or anything flavored like it ugh.

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

red food coloring is derived from beetles

70. left or right handed?

right

71. least favorite pattern?

overly-floral patterns i guessssss. also i hate wearing stripes.

72. worst subject?

chinese

besides that, math and physics

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

i rly like vanilla ice cream and fries

also i would eat ketchup with nearly anything

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

i usually just suck it up and go to sleep when it comes to pain but i guess an 8??? idk. i usually take advil/ibuprofen only for fevers

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

i got my first loose tooth on january 11 2005 and it fell out on january 18 2005 & it was a tuesday (pls don’t ask me how i remember this bc i dont know)

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

tater tots

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

cactus i guess. idk im not good at plants.

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

grocery store sushi (it was pretty decent in singapore so yeeeee lmao also i ate a lot of that as a kid)

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

its the same photo for both so yeAh

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

earth

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

idk i always called them fireflies

82. pc or console?

console I LOVE THE FEEL OF BUTTONS

83. writing or drawing?

drawing (more like doodlign for me bc i cant draw for shit)

84. podcasts or talk radio?

neither but if i rlllllly had to choose then podcasts i guessss s sss

84. barbie or polly pocket?

neither LMAO i gave all my barbies haircuts when i was a kid bc i didnt know what to do with them

85. fairy tales or mythology?

mythology for sure!! i love greek mythology (may or may not be bc of percy jackson lolol)

86. cookies or cupcakes?

cookies

87. your greatest fear?

losing those i love and care about (could be drifting or actual death it goes both ways)

88. your greatest wish?

rn, for my essay to write itself

for the short-term, to make the olympics (and WUGs…and worlds…and sea games…and asian games…and commonwealth games lmao)

for the long-term, uhhh idk. i just wanna live a life i’m satisfied with and to have a job i actually like and to be able to support my parents

89. who would you put before everyone else?

my mom

90. luckiest mistake?

i always say that i regret doing a year of college in singapore instead of coming here for freshman year but if i’d come in a year earlier like i was supposed to, i proba wouldn’t have made it past swim team tryouts and i made some pretty great friends in my first year of college soooo it all worked out i guessi cant think of any others rn

91. boxes or bags?

bags

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

fairy lights are rly pretty!!but i like natural light :”)

93. nicknames?

deb

debs

debo

debbo

alpha childuhh h h i think thats about it??? i cant remember any others

94. favorite season?

spring’s pretty great rni like fall too (before it gets cOLd)

95. favorite app on your phone?

insta/tumblr/telegram

96. desktop background?

a photo of me looking rly cool at the starting blocks before a race B)

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

4 - mine (singapore & US), my mom’s and my dad’s

98. favorite historical era?

uhh h h idk the ice age seemed pretty cool haha sike it was actually coldmedieval times seemed pretty cool too like damn i want a suit of armorWHEW I SPENT WAY TOO MUCH TIME ON THIS but i had fun so yeet

also if you read all the way down here ily and you’re cool

#ask #this was hella long #but also hella fun

[dontshootmespence]

Supernatural AU: Episode 3 - Home

Part 3

“You don’t believe in God?” Sam asked. For some reason it hurt him to know that.

Bobbie shook her head, lip quivering as the reality of that settled in again. She believed in something – in destiny – but the God her parents had told her about, the one that would always keep her family safe – no. That belief was long gone. It always put on the verge of tears. She wanted to believe so badly. That childhood desire was so hard to shake. “I don’t know how to anymore. Not after what we’ve seen. What we’ve been through.”

“And Dad never had any theories about what it was that killed Mom?” Dean asked, removing the gas nozzle from the tank of the Impala and placing it back at the pump.

For all John Winchester new about the supernatural, he could never figure out what came after their family that night. He never even had an inkling about what it was that had changed their lives forever. “No. Not that he ever said aloud. And I think he would’ve if he’d had any clue.”

“Before we do anything else, we should probably go grab a motel room and do a little research,” Dean said, pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger.

Bobbie and Sam went into the convenience store to grab some food and energy drinks that were undoubtedly taking years off their lives, but it didn’t matter. There were pressing matters at hand.

Alone outside, Dean inhaled a shaky breath and walked around the corner of the convenience store, where he was blocked by rickety metal walls, some wooden debris, a payphone and a dumpster. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialed his father’s number for the umpteenth time. Why wouldn’t he pick up the phone? Something had to be wrong. “Dad, it’s me. It’s Dean.” His voice wavered with each word. Being home scared him more than he wanted to admit. “Dad, I’m in Lawrence with Bobbie and Sam. There’s something in our old house.” He felt the nervousness rattle in his chest. “I don’t know what to do. None of us do. Please…I need your help.”

Bobbie and Sam would probably prefer not having his help. Both held grudges they had trouble looking passed, but he wasn’t afraid to admit – at least to himself – that he needed his father now more than ever.

-

Being the mother of two active children, trying to unpack and keeping track of every repair person that needed to come into the house had to be the equivalent of two full-time jobs – and in a couple of days she had to go back to work. Yay.

As Jenny invited the plumber inside, she held her hand to the cellphone so the man that would be coming in to fix the stove wouldn’t get caught between conversations. “Thank you so much for coming,” she said, shaking the man’s hand. She pointed toward the living room. “If you need anything, I’ll be in here.”

“No problem, Ma’am.”

“And please excuse the boxes,” she said sheepishly. She hated clutter. It made her feel like she was out of control. “Still haven’t unpacked everything yet.”

He gave her a warm smile, his toolbox feeling weighty in his hand and waved it off. “It’s nothing. I’ve seen it all.” He really had. And heard it all too. It was crazy what people would say and do in front of someone they didn’t know and would porbably never see again.

In all likelihood, this was going to be an easy fix. From what she’d said on the phone, it sounded like he would be able to be in and out of this house fairly quickly with a job well done. It was a nice little house. Once the clutter was taken care of and the house looked lived in, it would be even more inviting than it already was.

Kneeling down in front of the sink, he searched around the piping to see if anything of import stood out, but there was nothing. As a matter of fact, the pipes had next to no wear, like they were new. If he was sticking his hand in the sink, he needed to unplug the garbage disposal, so he tugged on the wire and stood up to do the necessary dirty work.

He rubbed his hands together and the friction created a warm, tingly feeling that he needed in the sudden chill of the house before he got back up and checked out the sink. He was going to have to stick his hand in there to figure things out. Gross, but someone had to do it.

Just as he was about to put his hand into the drain, he was startled by a kids’ toy. It was one of those creepy monkeys with the cymbals and it was clicking and clacking all on its own. Brushing it off, he returned to his duties, the rhythmic sound of the toy floating into the background, so much so that he never even noticed it stopped.

His hand slunk down into the drain as it had so many times before and he thought he felt something, but when he pulled his hand out there was nothing there. “Oh well,” he muttered. Back down he went.

When he felt around again, he found nothing. What could possibly be wrong with this thing? The monkey toy turned on again and startled him just as the garbage disposal turned on, crushing bone and slicing skin until there was little left of the fingers that had gone in, the remnants falling out of the bottom of the open pipe while blood-curdling screams filled the house.

-

Something felt especially wrong about approaching their father’s old friends under false pretenses, but they needed answers about John and not the sanitized ones they’d get if they came forward as his children. Despite what they did, Bobbie really did hate lying, but sometimes bad things were done with good intention so she held on to that.

Just two minutes down the road from their old place was one of John’s mechanic friends. Apparently, they’d been friends since they were kids. Astonishing what a lifelong vendetta could do to a friendship. “Hi, Jim Gibson?” Bobbie asked, approaching the older, seasoned gentlemen with an outstretched hand and a perkier-than-usual smile. “My name is Officer Perry. These are my partners, Officers Smith and Springs. We were wondering if you might have a couple moments to answer some questions about John and Mary Winchester.

Confusion stained his face. He hadn’t been asked about John in years and Mary even longer. “About what?”

According to police reports, Mary died in a fire due to an electrical short, so Sam thought on his feet. “Well, a couple months ago John came into the station claiming that it wasn’t an electrical fire that killed his wife. We decided to look into it to placate him, but now we can’t find him either.”

Mr. Gibson shook his head, defeated that his friend has slipped so far into such a dangerous delusion. “I don’t what I’ll be able to help you with, but sure, shoot.”

“What do you remember about John?” Dean asked.

Gibson’s answers were just as Bobbie would’ve expected. “John was a stubborn bastard.” If that wasn’t the understatement of the century, she wasn’t sure what was. But he loved their mother more than anything. “And those kids,” he said with a faint trace of a smile. “Those kids were his entire world. After Mary died, he didn’t smile much, but when he talked about his daughter and sons his face lit up.”

Bobbie held back a quivering lip and glanced to the side, seeing the look of shock on Sam’s face. “Did he ever talk about that night?” Sam wondered. There were so many times that he wished their father had been upfront with him about what happened – how he felt.

“John wasn’t thinkin’ straight,” he said, elaborating a bit when he met Dean’s expression. “He kept claiming that it was something, not someone, but something that killed her. It was an electrical short. A tragic accident. I begged him to get help but he spiraled so much that he even went to see a psychic, Moseley-something.”

After a few more questions that basically got them nowhere, the Winchesters left and immediately Dean’s hands slipped into Baby’s glove compartment to grab their father’s journal. “What’s up, Dean?” Bobbie quickly caught the journal and flipped toward one of the pages her brother described. When he pointed at the line she finally realized what had caught his attention. “Moseley. Missouri Moseley. I always thought this meant the state.” He said he’d ‘gone to Missouri and learned the truth.’

Sam breathed a sigh of relief. “We’re finally getting somewhere.”

-

As soon as they walked into the warmth of Missouri’s home, which doubled as her place of work, Bobbie felt a welcoming vibe. She didn’t remember a lot about Missouri except that she was a legit psychic and not a dime-store sellout. Sitting down in the corridor, they waited for her to finish up with a client. It sounded like he wanted answers to marriage problems and honestly Bobbie wasn’t sure which problem she’d rather have. The supernatural or the real world. Somehow placing your faith in another human being only to have them betray your trust seemed worse than a vampire or a werewolf.

About 10 minutes later, she finished up and walked him to the door, mumbling something about ‘poor bastard’ as she closed the door behind him. “Sam, Dean, Bobbie,” she said, her voice smooth like whiskey. “You’ve all grown up so much. So handsome. So beautiful. Let me look at you.” She pinched Bobbie’s cheeks and she didn’t actually want to kill her. That said a lot for Missouri’s effect on people. “Which is really saying something because you were a weird looking child,” she continued, pointing to Dean. All the ladies threw themselves in his direction now, but before he hit the age of 10, Dean was a little string bean.

Reaching out, she grabbed Sam’s hands in her own and sighed. “I’m so sorry about your girlfriend…and your father.”

“How did you-?” Sam started. He’d met some psychics that could pass for real, but Missouri was the real deal and Sam wasn’t exactly sure how to feel.

With a reassuring squeeze, she let go. “I can sense it.”

“Do you know where he is?” Bobbie asked hopefully.

“I’m not a magician,” she sassed. “I sense energies and emotions.”

Frustration plagued Dean’s entire being. Every time they got close to an answer it seemed they took five steps back. “Then what good are you?”

“I’m not a compass, boy. Now sit. And don’t even thinking about putting your foot on the coffee table.”

Dean’s mouth dropped open. “I didn’t even-“

“You were thinking it.”

Sam and Bobbie suppressed a laugh before the mood changed. “What do you remember about first meeting our father?” Sam asked.

She started wearily and almost guiltily. “He was desperate for answers and insisted that something other than an electrical fire took your mother. I told him about what was out there. What was truly out in the world.”

Dean spoke softly. “Do you know what killed our mother?”

She shook her head and Bobbie felt that small inkling of hope slip away. “No, but I had a bad feeling. You think something is back there?”

All three of them nodded. “I’ve been keeping an eye on the place and it seems like something is there again. Some kind of bad energy, but I can’t place it.”

“Why is it acting up now?” Sam wondered. His dreams about the house sprung to mind, but he didn’t want to bring them up. Now that they were here with Missouri he had a feeling he might know what these dreams actually were, but he wasn’t sure if he was strong enough for the answer just yet.

@remember-me-forever-silent-angel @gaylemonshark  @marveldivergentouatdctvfangirl @lalirang @averagekansan @addsomesalt @stusbunker @sebba-hiddles @fanfictionrecommendations-com @hoppy519 @thatwrestlingfan91 @extremeobsessions101 @spence-imagines @bettercallsabs @whaaatthefuuuuck @letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked @your-imagination-runs-wild @cryinglots @steggy01 @gigilame @sedulous-mind @a-unique-girls-heaven @just-antiyou @rmmalta @original-criminal-fanfics @ties-n-suits @veroinnumera @eurusholmmes @fanficienjoyedreading @astridstark13​ @ties-n-suits @demonlover87 @kennybud @shittyafblogwnopoint @pleasantlyfadingpeace @bulldozed88 @a-gir1-has-n0-name

#supernatural #supernatural au #supernatural fanfic #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fanfiction series #dean winchester #sam winchester #bobbie deanna winchester #bobby singer #dontshootmespence #born to fire #home #s1ep3

[jupiternovak]

So let's talk about Sherlock...

I just watched The Final Problem today and I am very torn on my opinion on it. while watching i didn’t notice almost any of the major issues with it, probably because I was too emotional to pay attention. I came on tumblr right after finishing and to be honest I was overwhelmed by the amount of hate TFP got, although now it’s been a few hours though and the more I think about it, the more problems arise. I would just like to talk about the plot holes I noticed in this and also the things I liked and disliked.

for the record, I didn’t hate the episode and I didn’t think it was horrible, I just think that Moftiss were overthinking and absolutely overlooked some key points and needless to say, almost everyone noticed.

first off

- how the fuck did John get out of the well? he was literally chained to the bottom and they just threw a rope at him, what the actual friggity fuck?!?

- TLD ended with Eurus shooting John, not just shooting at him, John literally said in the beginning of TFP that he got shot. Eurus said she would put a hole in John’s face an I really doubt she’d miss if she really wanted to shoot him. John doesn’t seem to be hurt at all though, guess he must be jesus h. fucking christ in the flesh or something;

- speaking of mysterious healing, tHEY JUMPED OUT OF A FIRST FLOOR WINDOW WITH A BOMB EXPLODING BEHIND THEM AND DIDN’T GET A SINGLE SCRATCH ON THEMSELVES. firstly, they broke the windows with their bodies so they must have gotten damaged from the glass. secondly, they jumped out of a window. remember in scandal in Belgravia when Sherlock threw that guy out of a window and how bad he got hurt from that? thirdly, a bomb exploded behind them. that would have increased their speed and also hurt them. yet, in the next scene they are completely fine and don’t even come and tell me it was a while later because when they talk on the phone they say Mycroft is in the hospital unconcious, which would suggest that the explosion had just happened.

- jumping back to TLD now, what exactly was the purpose of Eurus dressing up as Faith, the girl on the bus and Johns therapist? I kinda understand Eurus helping Sherlock by giving him the letter and leading him to Culverton, but why the other two? I understand that she’s a literal psycho but what benefit did that give her? none. just fucking confusing everyone.

- Mycroft is one of the smartest men alive and yet he lets Moriarty and Eurus meet without anyone checking on them whAT THE FUCK

- how’d the “miss me?” video get all over London in HLV? who the fuck distributed it? Eurus? she can hack now?

- Mycroft: *locks Eurus in Sherrinford* Eurus: *escapes* Mycroft: “hey yknow what’s a good idea? let’s take Eurus back to Sherrinford bc that sounds like a great plan lol!”

- why’d they never look in the well when looking for Victor/Redbeard? tf smh

- how and why tf did Eurus build a fake cell? what was the fucking point?

- one moment Sherlock and Eurus are talking to eachother through a tv screen and literally three human seconds later Eurus is sitting on the floor in her room and basically looks like she’s absolutely traumatised, with no camera or anything. were the videos prerecorded? if thats the case then wtf happened to Eurus while Sherlock was out? this bit and the next one still piss me off the most

- I understand building tension and putting Sherlock under pressure but the whole plane story was literally pointless. did Eurus pretend to be the child? i understand the metaphore of it but everything about Eurus is contradicting itself at this point and her character is just messy tbh

- suprisingly convenient doors in cells that lead to other cells what a coincidence :o

- how did Mycroft Holmes, again, one of the smartest men alive, not see this coming? is he a moron? he knew exactly what his sister was capable of and he was just like tralala Eurus can literally hypnotise ppl and make them do what she wants but shes locked up in a prison so that means no worries for me (*˘︶˘*).｡.:*♡

- where did the fake tombstones come from? did 8 year old Eurus bring them there or something? tf

- the absolute fuckery that happened when Sherlock first went into the room Eurus was in. how did he not see there was no glass? last i checked glass reflects, shouldn’t you be able to see that?

- there are fucking security cameras, did Mycroft literally never check what happened while he wasn’t there and while Eurus was just having a walk around London with Sherlock and having chips, and not only Mycroft, did nOONE CHECK AT ALL? SHERRINFORD IS A PRISOM FOR THE MOST DANGREROUS WHAT THE SHIT

- HOW DID JOHN GET OUT OF THE WELL I’M STILL CONFUSED

This episode wasn’t all bad though (hard to believe looking at literally everything I just wrote) but i did love a lot of things about it.

- WE GOT TO SEE SHERLOCK’S AND MYCROFT’S CHILDHOOD AND WHY THEY ENDED UP THE WAY THEY DID THIS IS ALL I EVER WANTED

- despite everything I still love the way they use the camera when filming Sherlock they’re all so smart about that

- Mycroft mouthing along to that movie

- Mycroft’s magic umbrella

- “hey bro!”

- THE HAT

- Mycroft having to sit in the chair

- MRS HUDSON LISTENING TO NUMBER OF THE BEAST

- Sherlock calling John family

- Sherlock calliNG JOHN FAMILY

- SHERLOCK CALLING JOHN FAMILY

- SHERLOCK LITERALLY GOT SO PISSED AT MYCROFT FOR WANTING TO EXCLUDE JOHN AND C A L L E D H I M F A M I L Y

- “Sherlock the pirate”

- Mycroft disguised as an old man anD THE REVEAL

- Sherlocks fake accent

- Eurus playing the violin

- Eurus being all gay

- Jim Moriarty

- Jim Moriarty stepping out if a helicopter with queen playing in the background

- Jim Moriarty literally hitting on his bodyguard

- Jim Moriarty

- “I am your christmas present”

- the thing Moriarty and Eurus do through the glass

- tiNY SHERLOCK

- FAT TINY MYCROFT

- TINY SHERLOCK BEING A PIRATE

- the absolutely horrifying amount of pressure Sherlock, John and Mycroft were under while doing the tasks

- the kid on the plane, absolutely terrified, but sippin on a juicebox

- John being so sure he could shoot the general but couldn’t

- Mycroft getting sick at the thought of killing

- Sherlock’s voice when he talks to the girl on the plane

- Mycroft and Sherlock deducing together

- Sherlock choosing John over Mycroft

- “soldiers today”

- Sherlock realising Molly loves him

- Sherlock choosing to shoot himself

- Sherlock doing the hand thing when matching the years on the tombstones to Eurus’s song

- Lestrade saying Sherlock is a good man yES

- violin-off

- SHERLOCK AND JOHN BEING ACTUAL FAMILY AND RAISING ROSIE TOGETHER

- HAPPY SHERLOCK HOLDING HAPPY ROSIE AND HAPPY JOHN HOLDING HAPPY ROSIE WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT

- SHERLOCK CALLED JOHN FAMILY I CAN NOT DEAL

- EVERYBODY IS HAPPY IN THE END (except probs Molly)

and now let’s get to everything I didn’t like, excluding the plot holes i described before

- how everyone treats John, like he’s always the dumb one in every situation, Mycroft thinks that, Eurus thinks that, Mary thought that, all the fans only know Sherlock and not him jUST PLS PPL APPRECIATE HIM MORE HE’S GOT IS SO HARD AND HE DESERVES BETTER

- Molly deserved better, she was just thrown around like trash like I get it you don’t wanna make Sherlolly canon (me neither dw) but stop toying with her like she’s nothing please she’s a great person and deserves more

- how John literally couldn’t physically and mentally push himself to watch the “miss me?” video at first but then when he got the “miss you” video he was like “oi Sherlock fam got some mail wanna have a movie night?”

- Moriarty is still dead, how disappointing

- there wasn’t enough Lestrade or Hudson, pls give the real heroes of the show some screentime they have to put up with Sherlock’s and John’s shit

- not enough deduction

- somehow even though Eurus is overpowered in every way Sherlock can still beat her so easily

- not enough Rosie

- we get it her name means East Wind now stop mentioning it every 2 minutes

- every character that is even a little bit LGBT is a bad character (Irene Adler, Moriarty bc let’s face it he’s gay as shit, Eurus etc)

that’s about all I got for now, I’m planning to rewatch the episode tomorrow so maybe I can evaluate it with a clearer head and get a less biased opinion on it. Moftiss could have done so much better when making this, TLD was an absolute masterpiece in so many aspects and TFP was a piece of literal garbage next to it. really hope they redeem themselves in the next season (if there is one) and explain a few things they didn’t this time. I really hope people stop hating on Moftiss for the decisions they made with this episode and instead give them actual legit points where they went wrong. too much negativity in the fandom right now. hope you all have a good day!

#sherlock #bbc sherlock #benedict cumberbatch #martin freeman #the final problem #the lying detective #tfp #tfp spoilers #tld #tld spoilers #sherlock spoilers #johnlock #john watson #sherlock holmes #mycroft holmes #i'm mad #eurus holmes #tjlc

[aesthetic-lover77]

Tumblr Questions

1. What’s your middle name?

The name I usually go by. Danielle. (My full name is Odafenikhoa Danielle Aigbodion (don't try to pronounce it))

2. What are you listening to right now?

Nothing, really. I'm watching some ASMR, if that counts. The last song I listened to was "Lost Boy" by Ruth B.

3. What was the last thing you ate?

Don't remember. I think it was Yorks (the peppermint pattie).

4. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?

My mother :)

5. Do you drink?

Nope :)

6. Do you smoke?

Nope :)

7. What is the first thing you noticed in someone?

Face. It's always the face. Or the personality.

8. What is your hair color?

Blue and Black

9. What is your eye color?

A very dark brown that legit looks like black

10. Do you wear contacts/glasses?

Do sunglasses count?

11. Dogs or cats?

Hm. I love cats and dogs, but sometimes dogs are too...jumpy. Cats are calm and fwuffy :3

(Me and my friends at school made a very stupid joke saying: "The dog is dogged.")

12. What’s your favorite animal?

Unicorn. Peacock. Lion. Fat Fucking Pigs.

13. What’s your favorite television show?

I don't really have one, but "Riverdale," "Pretty Little Liars," and "Married To Medicine" are a few to name.

14. What’s your favorite movie?

"Matilda." "The Parent Trap." Pretty much all the "Chucky" movies.

15. What’s your favorite band/singer?

Panic! At The Disco

Fall Out Boy

Twenty One Pilots

My Chemical Romance

I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

The Young Veins

Billie Eilish

Melanie Martinez

Etc? Etc.

16. How old are you?

I rather not say :)

17. Do you have a crush on anyone?

Yep.

18. What’s your sexual orientation?

Pansexual :)

19. What’s your favorite color?

Black. Dark Purple. Dark Blue. A very light shade of Baby Pink. A very dark shade of Pink.

20. What was your most embarrassing moment?

I don't remember, to be honest.

21. Do you ever wish you were someone else?

All. The. Goddamn. Time.

22. What were you like when you were a kid?

I was one weird ass child.

23. What would your dream house be like?

A fucking castle.

24. What last made you laugh?

My friend putting mint chapstick under her eyes.

25. What is your favorite word?

I don't know.

26. What is your least favorite word?

I also don't know.

27. What turns you on?

No answer :)

28. What turns you off?

No answer :)

29. What is your star sign?

Taurus.  

30. What are your favorite books?

"Wonderstruck." "Windfall." All the books in the F(ive)N(ights)A(t)F(reddy's) Series.

31. Do you have any siblings?

Yes, I do. One is 3 y/o (boy) and one is turning 22 (girl).

32. Do you like to dance?

It depends.

33. What is your definition of cheating?

When someone goes out of their way/marriage to fuck someone else besides their loyal spouse.

34. Have you ever cheated on someone?

Nope.

35. Do you regret anything?

A lot.

36. Do you have any phobias?

Not that I can think of, no.

37. Ever broken any bones?

Never.

38. Ever come close to death?

Not that I know of, no.

39. What is your religion, if any?

Catholic Christian. If I have to get to any detail, ROMAN Catholic Christian.

40. Have you ever been to a psychiatrist/therapist?

Never.

41. Are looks important in a relationship?

Meh. They're just a small percentage. Characteristics dominate.

42. Are you more like your mom or your dad?

People say I look like my dad, but I don't see it. But have both of my parents' personalities.

43. What is your favorite season?

Spring. It's not too hot, not too cold.

44. Do you have any tattoos?

No, but I want some.

45. Do you have any piercings?

Yep! Ear piercings.

46. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?

I've had 1. (I rather not get into detail with him)

47. Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?

Yes.

48. Who is your celebrity crush?

Pete Wentz.

Patrick Stump.

Brendon Urie.

Josh Dun.

Tyler Joseph.

Dallon Weekes.

Ryan Ross.

Spencer Smith.

Need I say more?

49. Are you a virgin?

Yes.

50. Do you get jealous easily?

It depends.

51. What is your favorite type of food?

Italian and Nigerian food are SOO good.

52. Do you ever want to get married?

Yes.

53. Who was your first kiss with?

Um...not gonna say...

54. Have you ever been cheated on?

No.

55. What is your idea of the perfect date?

Pretty much a lazy day.

56. Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

I hate outdoors (sometimes).

57. Do you believe in aliens or life on other planets?

I mean, I need a good reason why to believe it.

58. What talent do you wish you’d been born with?

Drawing. Singing (I'm an okay singer).

59. What is your saddest memory?

When I found out my grandfather died.

60. Do you believe in love at first sight?

Not really.

61. Do you believe in soul mates?

Yes, I do.

62. Have you ever dyed your hair?

Yes.

63. Has someone ever spread a nasty rumor about you?

Yup.

64. Would you go against your moral code for money?

Stealing. Scamming.

65. What are three things most people don’t know about you?

1.) I'm Nigerian, not Asian.

2.) I'm very smart and have a rare sense of humor.

3.) I'm different from the rest.

66. Who are you jealous of?

Nobody. I'm living my life perfectly bitch.

67. Do you sleep with a stuffed toy?

No.

68. How long was your longest relationship?

2 Months (It's very complicated.)

69. Is the glass half empty or half full?

Well, it depends on your mood.

70. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?

Give me a lap dance (BAHAHAHAHA)

71. Who is your most loyal friend?

I don't wanna say her name. I respect her privacy.

72. Are you in a relationship?

Well...yes and no...

73. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?

Her/His/Their humor. Her/His/Their Personality.  

74. Are you a bad person?

No. People think I am, but I'm not.

75. Are you a lover or a fighter?

Both.

76. What did you do on your last birthday?

Have about 20 pieces of cake :)

77. What is your favorite quote and why?

"Love Is Not A Choice" ~ Brendon Urie ~ Girls/Girls/Boys ~ Too Weird To Live, Too Rare To Die! ~ Panic! At The Disco.

Why?

Because love is NOT a choice.

78. If your best friend died, what would you do?

Cry.

Then find the motherfucker who did it.

79. If you had to go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?

My life :)

80. If you only had 24 hours to live, what would you do?

Listen to a bunch of albums, eat a bunch of food, and be lazy.

81. What is the strangest dream you’ve ever had?

Um...

82. Are you happier single or in a relationship?

In a relationship.

83. Who were you in a past life?

I don't fucking know!

84. What is your happiest childhood memory?

When my brother was born :)

85. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?

Yep.

86. Have you ever had an imaginary friend?

Yes, and it was freaky.

87. If you were the president, what would you do?

Legit pamper my school and all my friends and let everyone else SUFFER (jkjk)

88. What is your ideal career?

A surgeon.

89. What is your political affiliation?

I don't really know about that one.

90. Are you conservative or liberal?

Liberal(?)

91. Is the male or female body closest to perfection?

I mean. Girls have curves. And boobs.

Guys have abs. And dicks.

92. Do you like kissing in public?

Meh. I mean, if it's just a peck, sure. But it has to be appropriate timing.

93. If you could change one thing in the world, what would you change?

I would change every bad thing in this world.

94. Where would you like to live?

Right here in my home state (Rhode Island) or New York.

95. Where would you go on your dream vacation?

Hawaii, Paris, or England.

96. Describe yourself in one word.

Me!

97. Describe yourself in one sentence.

I may seem calm when you first met me, but when you really get to know me, I'm one crazy-ass person.

[booksbroadwaybbc]

Don't know what to do with myself. via /r/selfimprovement

Don't know what to do with myself.

Hi. I'm 21 and still in community college, but I did get my provisional admission to this university I wanted to transfer to. I work as a runner at Din Tai Fung and I'm supposed to make bank, but I don't really know yet because I'm a new employee. Headtitle question at the bottom

I think I've lived an okay-ish life, kind of. story time, skip to the end if you dont wanna read it I come from a Korean family, can't say I remember much of my childhood except mostly being beaten and yelled at. There were good times too, but they usually ended prettily shittily. Moved around a bunch, went to a lot of schools. I've dealt with a lot of abusive stuff from both parents, but I'm not going to talk about my mom because things have gotten better and she's still here for me(?). For some extreme stuff- my dad broke my brothers toes in elementary school. In my senior year, he threatened me at knifepoint and forced it into my hands and told me to stab my brother or he would stab me. Beatings from him were pretty bad, and it's not just belts and sticks bad. I played co-ed baseball in 5th grade, so bam, there was that too. He liked to throw chairs and literally flip tables when he was angry (hes a private construction worker, so he's pretty strong). Broke a lot of his phones throwing them at us, the wall, the floor, whatever. Ive had a lot of problems with my social affairs in highschool- anxiety, being cold, being short tempered, aggressive, violent, sharp tongued. I started warming up in senior year because of this girl I dated, which was a pretty big deal because gays are not allowed in this household. And well, im bi but its the same thing to them. Can't say that went too well, because my brother found out and blackmailed me in the situation we were living in. But who cares, because siblings hate each other right? Anyways, broke up with her, broke her heart, treated her poorly and whatever two years later we made up and was able to be friends again. Back to dad- he was usually never around for things like elementary grad, middle school grad, and highschool- my mom made him come, but he sure didn't seem happy about it. In highschool, he only laid down on his phone playi ng his shitty phone games. Doesnt talk to me, doesnt talk to my brother, doesnt talk to my mom. His routine: wake up, go to work, come home, phone games, eat, phone games, sleep. If you try to talk to him, he ignores you. If you press it, he'll give you some boring answer like "go away already".

Anywho, that abusive fuck was caught cheating. Had an affair with a client's sister. Sold the house we lived in, mom moved to Newark, him to San Leandro. Mom didnt want to deal with me, so I got the boot and lived wjth acquaintances in Hayward. Couldnt afford it, so mom told me to move to San Leandro with him. I moved in with my best friend helping me and we saw the evidence. Bambam, hello lady clothing and shit. I went apeshit nuts and he tried to convince me, then threatened that I would be in big trouble if i said anything. (Parents were separated but not divorced). Alright, ill keep my big mouth shut.

I worked for his "girlfriend" at her cafe in Berkeley. Why? Well, it was easy money and i needed it to keep up with my shitty coping habits- partying and party favors, mostly e. You dont have to deal with stress if youre always out partying.

Anywho, fast forward, skip a lot of details. Mom gets a phone call one day from mutual acquaintance saying dad is sick and asks her to bring him some food. Alright. So she does because she still cares, and finds out the truth. Calls me and demands me to come right now and unlock the door- note that this is a 40 minute drive. By the time i get there, theres hella police and a window is broken and theres hella shit going on. Things settled down but being my immature ass i scream at my parents for both being immature, and they shouldve just cut things clean. I yell at my dad for being a fuckhead and cheating, you didnt raise a liar but you are one. I yell at my mom for being irresponsible and breaking things. Police grabs my shoulder but i swipe it off and bam. Im on the floor, face into concrete, chipped teeth and i cant even see where my dog is. Tbh i was more worried that he ran off because he was still a puppy and i was holding him during this whole ordeal. My glasses got knocked off my face when those two officers fucking bodyslammed me into the ground. I'm 5ft4, i weighed like 130 at this time but im just a legit smol asian girl.

What happened next? Well yknow, i got arrested and sent to jail for assaulting a police officer, nbd. Sat there for a few hours, listening to some psycho making weird noises. Finally get some call saying that my mom was waiting for me, and she bailed me out. She was crying a lot and told me that my dad didnt even bat an eye as they took me away, that he smiled and tried to fix his goddamn broken window. I believe it too, because I saw that shitty smirk on his face when i got to the scene. My mom has a bit of an uncontrollable temper so she looks psycho when the other person was the wack one. This was in January 2017.

Skip forward to the next police thing. June 2017. My mom demands that i pack all my shit and move back, and she wants to go with me. I plead no, but what am i gonna do against her? Alright, we drive and she starts saying stuff about lying and calls the bitch a slut and homewrecker and stuff, dad gets up to stand inbetween and stuff. Tells her to move than basically shoves her across the living room towards the door. **insert hysteria and bam again, screaming and each other, his hands on her, me trying to squeeze my body in between them and get his hands off of her. Doesnt really work cos he turns on me, hits me away and goes back to beat her. My screaming doesnt really help either, but i try what I can to claw his arms off of her. Nooooo, bad idea, but better me than her. He grabs me and my head is locked into his elbow so I bite down, arm. Baaaad idea again, but its in self defense imo. Im just trying to help my mom. He p much beats me up into a pulp her, grabs my shirt all the way up and yikes thats embarassing. The struggle goes on and eventually its calm again because slutface is like "honey staph"- note: only words and no actions to get close, buuuut, it works. Me and mom move to my room and start removing all my weebshit from the walls. Mom is muttering and saying a bunch of bs for him to hear and he storms into the room because hes fucking triggered and start the violence again. Oh but this is where i do the fun thing- i lunge myself at him so im like on top of him but holy shit, he legit pulls me off of him and throws me against the wall cabinets, and two hand chokes me, with his knees on my chest. Mom starts screaming at him, claws his face and soon the police are here and shit. Bitch called the police, and this is where it gets more fucked up. I legally live here, its on my license. I came back to move out, so its okay for me to be here, because i came to pack my stuff and take whats mine. So why exactly did the police not believe me? Why did my mom get arrested for putting dumb scratches on his face when he beat us, with pictures - that day- to prove that he inflicted more wounds on us. We were just defending ourselves. He put his hands on us first. Anyways, that starts my worries cos im like. Im 20, but idk what to do. How do i find money to bail my mom out? How do i even do that in the first place? But i managed.

Anywho skip forward, jackass is no longer in my life, tho i have to deal with him through my brother from time to time. Parents officially divorced Feb 2018. I've lived with my mom, she bought a cafeteria for a little bit so I worked there. Things were really hard because my mom had a lot of pent up anger that she would take out on me. My brother moved out because he went to university so he didnt really have to deal with much. Im also the older child, so bam. Anyways, we fought a lot. A LOT LOT. Like apeshit crazylot. I took a lot of beatings. It was like the weekend before Christmas of 2017 where a took a huge beating and ran away from my problems by going to my now-ex's house. He offered me to move in with him and his family, so I did. I had the choice of going back to my moms lifestyle and attempt to make up, or trying to live a different life. I lived with him from like Christmas to March 2018. We started having a lot of problems because he regret inviting me, he wasnt ready to give up his personal space and I was done babysitting someone who was older than me. Doing his laundry, doing his dishes, cleaning his room. I was done with being bored, never going out, being ignored while he did the same thing my dad did. Sit on his phone and not speak a word. Yeah, there were good times too, but they seem so fleeting when it seeps in with your own personal trauma of being ignored. Btw- when i moved to his place, my brother moved back home to fill the gap, but my brother is better with dealing with my mom and she doesnt blow up at him.

After I moved back, it was better. Yeah, shit went down sometimes but i guess overall it was better? My mom cried a lot. I would hear her talk on the phone with her family members in Korea and cry about how she was tired of everything and didn't want to do it anymore. I know exactly how that feels. Well, in the later months of 2018, we got along better and havent really had those blowups. I tried my best to stay home more instead of going out at night because she hated it. I tried to be nicer to her and more compromising. She's in Korea rn and things suck. During the whole parents thing, it sucks to feel like your parents are passing you to each other likea toy they dont want. It sucks to not really feel familial love growing up, where mom is just doing things because shes supposed to and dad just flat out pretends you dont exist. It sucks that it takes two years of partying, drugs and cons to find out

Submitted October 31, 2018 at 10:33AM by xfirelily via reddit https://ift.tt/2CRsVBn

#IFTTT #reddit

[ebiyoru]

second of january, 0102

woke up empty.

met tine and nives @ rob around 2 pm (saw lester on the way to rob) 

ate at bonchon with them.

forgot to give the red ribbon i bought for nives.

> decided to go back home.

drove ate bot jai nash back home.

stopped by starbucks on the way home.

met coach ichan.

the happy tomato i was.

hello.

i know, i’m really bad at maintaining this. maintaining anything. but hey, here i am, 7 days after, trying to relive the best moments i had for this blog’s day, with my oh-so-reliable short term memory.

i’ll try to remember. i swear i will.

so this is the day after the grand moving, right? well, the last day i was so drained and can barely even think so i plopped on the cushion right away. i woke up hours later to eat and watch a movie (Split; tldr it was a nice movie and p.s i watched it while looking at my phone for subs). my mom wasn’t with us that night. she stayed with my dad as they knew more about each others’ real feelings. i knew she was contemplating everything at that point. in the early morning, around sunrise, i can hear my mom and elder sister talking in the adjacent room. i was not in my right senses to listen intently in whatever topic they have, so i just unconsciously listened to their voices and slept some more.

so when i woke up the next morning, maybe around 9:00 a.m??, i stayed for a bit on the cushion, checking twitter updates on my phone because what else can a depressed and drained young adult do in these kinds of situation? later on, i found out my sister’s boyfriend is still with us. then i remember he didn’t have any work that day since it is a government holiday. and my younger sister is still beside me, sleeping.

i finally had the motivation to get up and wash myself when i remembered my plan in the afternoon with my close friend whom i haven’t seen for so long. i stayed inside the bathroom for an hour and so while scrolling through my twitter feed because again, i’m depressed and drained.

i....strangely found comfort in the groups i stan. it’s like they’re in a world free of all the drama, free of all these problems. with all the happy moments they’re showing on screen, it seems like they have a carefree life. it’s strangely comforting to think that such a world exists, although i know what they have off-screen might be the total opposite.

later on, my mom arrived at the apartment the moment i stepped out of the bathroom (apparently, they went to the market; “they” implying my mom went with my dad). i get dressed and prepped myself for my meeting. later on, i can hear ate bot, my mom and kuya adrian talking in the living room about my dad.

my mom feels sympathy towards my father who needs help. even after all the horrible things my dad has done, there’s no denying he’s still our family. we are the ones who can help him through this. through everything. ate bot and kuya adrian understands this as well, and they genuinely comfort my mom. 

for me, i’ve always seen my dad as someone who wants to be seen as a tough man, even though he really wanted to be a fun and reachable dad. he basically is someone who is bad at expressing himself. i myself believes he almost has no control on how he handles his emotions, and i’ve been patient with him as much as i can. but i know i’m also guilty of not properly conveying my thoughts to him. of not talking to him most of the time. and how much i thought i hated him when the worst of these past few days showed his worst sides.

but hearing their conversation brought back my beliefs on how my dad probably thinks. i’ve been in those tough times too, and it sucks. when a demon resides in your brain, sometimes all you can do is surrender. 

but in this case, we can be that helping hand to him. we can be someone who can shoo away the demon, who can keep our hold tight on his arm and get him away of that darkness.

so after that, i walked to the station with kuya adrian. he’s off to fetch my sister because apparently, she had an ulcer attack at work and needed to go home earlier. when i got off the jeepney and was walking to the overpass, i saw a familiar figure walking towards my direction. his tallness, physique, and face is something that i can never forget, i guess. 

i saw L, and he’s carrying bags in both his hands.

i walked past him and looked at him as i continued walking. he wasn’t looking. though maybe he noticed. 

some time later, i went on to meet tine. i brought my gifts for her and her son. i saw her with nives sitting beside a waffle stall in our local mall. when i saw her, i laughed as much as i can and eventually felt like not a single bad thing is happening to me that day. tine and nives were an instant mood booster that day.

when nives saw me, she immediately showed affection to me, as if he’d known me for so long. i grew attached to him that fast too.

we ate at bonchon and catched up with each other. we were supposed to meet with wayne a few days before but our plan didn’t see the light of day. so we were kinda disappointed. but the whole time, she told me all her worries at that time and i didn’t get a chance to tell mine. or maybe i really just didn’t want to. maybe this is something i can dwell inside of me alone.

i enjoyed my time with the both of them. i have this level of comfort with these close bestfriends of mine that i can’t quite explain. it’s as if we only met yesterday. it’s as if all those years were nothing and we just saw each other again like usual. i love that. i will treasure that.

i also love how nives was comfortable to play with me that day. i’ve only seen him maybe 3 times but that little boy is just really charming and lovable. i kinda thought that maybe i can work in a daycare someday. lol that’s a passing thought that i let pass by the way. 

i want to remember what i noticed are things nives like and dislike: he likes potato fries, cookies, yakult (yogurt drink), sweet drinks, balloon and toys and the color red. he dislikes sauces, any green stuff, meat (because of his still growing teeth), and her mommy going anywhere far from his sight.

he’s also a boy who’s great at making people laugh, he wants to sit on people’s laps and lean, and he likes feeding other people. i can vouch for the last one lol.

moments later, we parted ways and my stupid self forgot to give my other gift to them (the pasalubong bundle i bought from red ribbon so nives can eat them at home).

going back to the apartment, i received messages from my sister asking me if we wanted to go back home. for me, i’m okay with it. i mean, not to come clean or anything, i didn’t even propose anything about this whole moving agenda. i legit didn’t know about this plan not until they started sending screenshots of available apartments on the gc. not until we went there with ate leth and family. so of course, i’m okay with going back home. because i believe to resolve all this, we need to face it with all of our hearts.

after my mom’s long, unfiltered talk with ate bot and kuya a., and the humble approach of my elder sister, we all decided to come back home. if i can call it home after all these. when kuya a. came home with ate jmr that afternoon, and after i came back from my meeting with tine, we drove ate bot and her sons home. lj was also with us.

the long ride was hushed but joyful, with occasional laughter here and there. wonders of how the heck any of these happened. i can feel there’s something that changed, but it’s for a slowly changing and growing family. 

on the way home, we stopped by petron stopover to freshen up a bit. it was an early evening but we still opted to go to starbucks. remembering tine’s pasalubong for me, i took the box of chocolates with me to the cafe. (which later on was almost forgotten on a distant table near the queue, yikes). 

upon entering, and a few strides, i saw a familiar figure in my left peripheral vision. i can sense it. i turned my head and there i saw coach ichan. i was hesitant at first to check if it’s him when he immediately stood up from his seat when he saw me looking at him. remembering it now, i’m quite sure he’s the one who noticed first, and that fluttered my heart.

i was beaming with joy. i can’t believe someone from my childhood, from my early teenage, passionate years, still remembers me and my mom and my sister. i immediately called my mom to show her and he immediately hugged her. he asked me a few questions before returning back to his seat. we then proceeded looking for empty tables and waiting in queue. i was still smiling oh, so loudly. 

later my sister suggested i go take a picture with him. i was shy at first but he’s someone i adored when i was 10/11 so it would be a waste not to have a proof of this day, which at first was the worst to ever wake up to but really refreshing to end. i walked up to their table (he’s with friends) and asked for a picture which he gladly obliged. (we used my sister’s phone). again he asked me some questions, and one of those was “what’s your facebook again?” in which i answered, “oh, don’t worry. we’re already friends, [coach]”. 

“oh, avhi anganangan, right?” 

......i’m//

he.....

        remembered

  my

 last nn

ame 

name

BITHC

i was overwhelmed to know he REALLY remembered me after, what, 10 or so years and even so MY FORKING LAST NAME. that’s a big deal to me. and for it to come from someone in one of the most important parts of my pre-teenage years. 

i...kinda want to ask a few questions to him too. maybe catch up a bit. but he’s with his friends so i hesitated.

after we finished our drinks, we drove to the apartment again. we picked up the things we needed for the night. 

kuya a. asked to be dropped off the first gate. we drove back home after.

dad was waiting. he accepted us. we did too. i guess. though my elder sister was still quite stiff. 

a lot of sorry’s were exchanged. he ruffled my hair.

and it was a rough day. and a rather tiring night.

i just want to remember this as the day i get to see three of the people who made me extremely happy whenever i see them.

[see below for my photo with tine and baby nives also my photo with coach ichan hhhhhhh ]

#i was delighted #i think this will be one of the best days of my 2018 #spec: crush #spec: friends #spec: special #2018:01

[whosebody]

back to the hospital

A week ago Monday (or so, I disremember exactly when) I woke up in the night with a charley horse in my left calf. I’ve had these nocturnal cramps off and on since childhood and thought little of it, especially since I’d been reorganizing cupboards and etcetera around the house and had been doing a lot of reaching and stretching. But this charley horse didn’t let up. In fact, it kept building.

So, since I’ve been having a little extra trouble with nausea and vomiting lately, I assumed this was probably an electrolyte issue. I took a potassium tab I had leftover from when I also used to take lasix (a diuretic), and also drank as much Powerade Zero as I could stand, and threw down a couple of magnesium tablets and two extra calcium supplements for good measure. None of that helped, and my next trip to the  medicine cabinet found me looking for some Tylenol 3 leftover from a dental procedure.

I am  not a pain pill kind of gal, and I don’t know why I didn’t take those old T3s to the pill take-back box a couple of weeks ago when I took everything else. But I can’t have NSAIDs after RNY, so I dug these out and took one. This also did not help, although it could have been because they were so old.

On Tuesday night, at NINE PM, OMG, my husband suddenly remembered this urgent bank errand that has to be done right this very second...well, tomorrow. But by then I could barely walk. Not trying to be dramatic, but on a scale of 1 to 10 I would have rated my pain at blinding agony. I was using an old cane I had purchased years ago during my spell of dizzy spells. Since I began treatment for my cataclysmic sleep apnea the dizzy spells have disappeared and the cane has mostly served to hook dog toys from under the sofa, but now I was using it to assist my hobble.  But he still got annoyed when I told him no, I would not be (a) going to the bank, or (b) standing in line at the bank, while in blinding agony.

Expecially not when I am legit having a crisis of my own.

Anyway, you know that rule about not going to bed mad? It does not apply to me! I was totally mad at him.  I was so desperate to escape the pain that I had zero trouble lapsing into a coma. I slept almost twelve hours, but when I woke up I was in tears. I peed myself on the way to the bathroom because I couldn’t walk right or fast enough. And then I cried all the way to the back door to let the dogs out so they could pee. And then I collapsed into a chair and texted--yes texted--my youngest daughter who actually lives here. She normally sleeps most of the day, particularly now that college is out for the rest of summer, and I normally hate bothering people, but I couldn’t stop crying from the pain.

I don’t consider myself a wussy, and just for the record neither does my dentist. She calls me Iron Woman.

My message said, “I need help.”

To her credit, she popped right out of her room. She said, “You’re lucky I’m awake or I wouldn’t have seen your text.”

I said, “You’re lucky you’re awake, because in two minutes I would have started calling and blowing up your phone.”

She helped me get ready, got the dogs in, ran up to the store to get my almond milk for my morning protein. She brought me my pills. While she was gone, I called the surgeon. They were at lunch, but called me back in a few minutes and told me that the leg pain and nausea were probably two different issues and I should go to the nearest emergency room. So Spawn took me. (Tom was at work.)

This is my ER room:

Yes, I was watching Beverly Hillbillies. And yes, I wear velcro shoes. Not because I am too fat or too lazy to tie my shoes, but because they were (a) brown, (b) the right size, and (c) on clearance for $8. Also (d) super freaking comfortable! And (e) get pretty good traction.

Anyway once they decided to admit me, I texted Tom and let him know, and also told him that the staff didn’t think I was in any imminent peril and there was no need for him to rush home from work. I kinda think he likes having a “special needs” wife who requires him to rush home from work...except he really doesn’t and recent events are not representative of what being married to me is really like. I am not that high maintenance.

Next I dispatched the Night Spawn, who was super tired from  not having slept most of the day, to pack me a bag and have it ready for Tom to pick up after work on his way to the hospital.

They took me upstairs and parked me in a room. I have pictures, but most of them have personally identifiable information, so I will not be posting those. But here is a shot of the view from my window. 

And there’s the bag the Night Spawn packed for me. She accidentally packed my Office On Wheels Bag instead of my hospital bag, but it worked, so who cares. I try not to be critical when people are trying to help me, even if they don’t do it quite the way I would prefer. I try. Not that I always succeed.

While they were wheeling me up I started getting Facebook messenger messages on my phone from a certain friend who likes to share every molecule of drama in her life, but then goes radio silent whenever I have anything going on. I am sure I am a huge disappointment to her lately because I have so much going on. By which I mean, I am not really available to mollycoddle her because I GOT MY OWN PROBLEMS.

So she started telling me all about these issues which, in my opinion she brings on herself via her absolute refusal to ever set any boundaries whatsoever (but I relate to how difficult that can be, boy do I ever) and I hugely broke with tradition and said:

“I can’t talk now, I’m being admitted to the hospital for blood clots and cellulitis.”

And she said, “Are they giving you any percocet?”

Because, you know, I’m a percocet dealer and this is the most important aspect of what I’m going through.

And then she went back to prattling on about the drama(s), and eventually I passed out again to escape the pain.

Just for the record, they didn’t not give me percocet. I could barely get them to bring me (regular) Tylenol over the next few days.

I am starting to hurt from sitting here for so long, so I am going to end this entry here and try to finish it up next time.

Spoiler alert:  I lived.

#wls #rny #complications #dvt #cellulitis #i got my own problems

[flauntpage]

How Dr. J and Larry Bird Helped Build a Video Game Empire

Growing up, Trip Hawkins was a big fan of strategy board games; he's been a paying Strat-O-Matic customer for more than 50 years. While a student at Harvard University in the mid 1970s, he created AccuStat Football, blowing $5,000 of his father's money on a few hundred copies of a board game that found hardcore fans but not a larger audience. He loved his simulated pigskin creation, but for his friends it lacked a certain visual pizzazz.

"It was basically a computer game without a computer, and my friends didn't find it all that fun. They gravitated toward watching TV," says Hawkins. "I enjoyed the idea of a sports game that involved thinking, making choices, and living with the outcomes. When I first heard about computers, I thought, Someday, if I can combine the simulated gameplay with the pretty pictures of television, everyone will want to play it."

His first business venture may have been a flop, but he already had a plan to turn his beloved geeky football game into something bigger. Hawkins designed his own major with a focus on game design, and after the first retail store to rent microprocessors opened in Massachusetts in 1975, he began conceptualizing what his video-game company might look like.

After graduating from Harvard in 1976 and getting an MBA at Stanford, Hawkins spent a few years working for a small startup called Apple, eventually rising to Director of Strategy and Marketing before leaving to start his own company. Electronic Arts was officially founded and incorporated on May 28, 1982, with one major goal in mind: Hawkins, a sports nerd going back to his childhood, wanted to change the way sports games were played.

"It was hard to see the football game I poured myself into fail, but I realized two things. I loved being an entrepreneur, and I had a lot to learn about running a business," he says. "I'm not an engineer, but I was working with some of the best software developers in the world, who weren't seen as artists. The angle I decided to take was to embrace them as the creative divas that they were and treat video games as the new Hollywood."

As the company celebrates its 35th anniversary this week, it's worth noting one early title that proved to be especially pivotal in EA's transformation into the $4.4 billion juggernaut it is today, and did, in fact, fulfill Hawkins' dream.

The 1983 release of One-on-One: Dr. J. vs. Larry Bird brought professional athletes into the video-game realm for the first time. It was a big leap forward for the company, and for the industry. There had been games like MLB Baseball for Intellivision that slapped the logo on a box, but there had never been a video game that allowed people to play as the athletes they watched.

"Dr. J. vs. Larry Bird was a major breakthrough for us, and it held up really well over time," says Hawkins. "The all-time best games have mechanics players don't get tired of. One-on-One has that design elegance, and it stayed alive even past Dr. J's retirement when we brought Michael Jordan on board."

Over its lifespan, the game was a huge financial boon for EA Sports, but the biggest payoff was in how it shaped the company. Hawkins says One-on-One gave him the confidence to further develop team sports games, letting players live out their athletic dreams from the couch.

EA Sports now boasts best-selling Madden, NHL and FIFA franchises, but One-on-One was first.

"It's a fantasy streetball version of basketball, instantly appealing because as a fan, you know who Larry Bird and Julius Erving are," says Jeremy Saucier, assistant director for the International Center for the History of Electronic Games in Rochester, New York. "I grew up in Massachusetts, and in the early 1980s, it seemed like the Celtics and 76ers met in the Eastern Conference Finals every year. EA took the cultural currency of the rivalry to create a best-selling game the likes of which hadn't been seen before."

One-on-One was more than just a bridge from the rudimentary video games of yore to today's technical marvels. It was a unique gaming experience that's remembered fondly by kids of the short-shorts era. In a warm tribute to the game at the website Kill Screen, writer Abe Stein says One-on-One can be seen as "a piece of surrealist art" and "absurdist basketball" in comparison to naturalistic gaming experiences like NBA 2k17.

"I'm sure the game looks ancient now—today's games are almost like real life—but I'm proud I got to be part of an early success," Larry Bird told VICE Sports. "Knowing that Julius and I were the first guys ever involved in something like it is pretty cool."

Julius Erving and Larry Bird's on-the-court rivalry helped sell popularize the video game. Photo Dick Raphael-USA TODAY Sports

Other factors helped lay the groundwork for EA's success. One-on-One came out in the same year that the great video-game crash of 1983 decimated the home console market. Some blamed the catastrophic release of Atari's E.T. the Extraterrestrial, thousands of copies of which were infamously buried in a New Mexico landfill. But E.T. was far from the only phoned-in title, and the glut of consoles and games flooding the market is widely believed to be the main culprit.

The Atari 2600 had been instantly popular since its release in 1977, but the company's glory days were over. EA came on to fill the gaming void.

"I considered the 2600 a toy, played for amusement, destined to be an electronic hula hoop that was dead in a few years," says Hawkins. "It only had 128 bytes of memory—notice I didn't say 'K'—so you couldn't do anything with it. What I was interested in was simulation, so we leapfrogged the 2600 and went to home computers. At the time, they cost around a thousand dollars, but were so much more powerful and allowed EA to do real software development."

Originally released for the Apple II, One-on-One would also become available for ColecoVision, Atari 800, Tandy TRS-80, and, crucially, as a floppy-disc game for the Commodore 64, the most popular computer in history. EA envisioned sports games as a staple from the outset, but Hawkins admits that baseball and football came before hoops in his hierarchy. His early focus was on the gridiron. He knew there wasn't enough processing power at the time to do a full 11-on-11 football game, but he had an idea based on his personal fandom.

"I'm a 49ers fan and EA launched the year of their first Super Bowl win, which followed 'The Catch,' Joe Montana to Dwight Clark. I thought maybe we could animate a quarterback, a receiver, and a couple of defensive players," says Hawkins. "The one thing I was certain of was that the game had to have the actual players in it, real-life heroes in a box. As it turned out, Atari made a deal with Montana to be an endorser of its entire product line, so I had to go a different route."

In considering how best to create a mano-a-mano game, Hawkins recalled a one-on-one basketball tournament sponsored by the hair-care product Vitalis. (Hawkins says he saw short black-and-white clips when he was a kid, but the only reference we found to the competition dates it to 1972, when Hawkins would have been 19. Check out the amazing title match between Bob Lanier and Jo Jo White. To honor the concept, the winner was paid $15,000 in singles!) Hawkins believed that a two-player basketball game could work because it would reflect a version of the sport people played in real life. Once he decided on the concept, he knew he wanted his favorite player in the game: Dr. J.

Julius Erving flew to the company's original headquarters in San Mateo, California, for principal photography and to give Hawkins and his team pointers. That was great, but Hawkins also needed to find the perfect stylistic foil to Erving, a sharp-shooting yin to Dr. J's sky-walking yang. And it would help if they were already NBA rivals.

"I played pinball as a kid, wasn't much for video games, but I remember when my agents explained what the concept was, I thought it was a great idea," Bird says. "I specifically remember the cover, it turned out great, really looked like Dr. J. and I just finished working out on a New York City playground… I can't remember if we shot it in New York. We must have. Sure looks like it."

Actually, both men had attended an event at the Hall of Fame in Springfield, Massachusetts. EA photographers went to Massachusetts and grabbed Bird and Erving for a quick shoot afterwards. EA didn't have license to use Sixers or Celtics jerseys in the game, but luckily NBA jerseys wouldn't have fit with the playground motif, anyway.

Instead, EA told both players to wear street clothes for the cover shoot. They also instructed Erving to go shirtless and socks-up, and for both men to give their hardest-ass glare. It wasn't the Rucker, but it didn't really matter. It's not like they would've played an actual game.

"The photo features sprayed-on sweat," Hawkins says. "They both had lucrative professional basketball contracts, so they're not actually going to play one-on-one. If one of them got injured, EA would've had major issues."

Even the way the game shipped out to consumers was unique. Previously, floppy disc games were delivered in standard plastic baggies, no style whatsoever. Hawkins upped the flavor by going with a custom-sized cardboard record-album package. The 8-inch-square gatefold, with a sleeve for the game, was an entirely new presentation.

(For the record, Hawkins' favorite version was for the Commodore Amega, which included ambient sounds he and producer Joe Ybarra recorded live at a Warriors game. The hot dog and beer vendor sound samples were legit.)

The cover for the game was shot in Springfield, Massachusetts. Courtesy Electronic Arts

For all of its early-80s technological innovation, One-on-One would've had all the lasting cultural cachet of Double Dunk had it not been a monster hit. The game starts, like so many amazing basketball careers, with two competitors, one ball, and a playground. It was as cool as Dr. J. from the jump, opening with a Mooged-out version of Scott Joplin's "Maple Leaf Rag" with options to play against the computer, and four levels ranging from "Park and Rec" to "Pro." Or, of course, the version that whiled away many a sunny afternoon indoors, the head-to-head showdown, played either timed or to a certain score. Players even got to choose "Winner's Outs" or "Loser's Outs" on the possessions. (Law of the hooping land: half-court games are winner's outs.)

" One-on-One hit at a time that allowed it to be successful, but it wouldn't have had the same impact if it didn't have such great playability," says Saucier, one of the early video-game historians. "It was only six years after the introduction of Pong, the original sports game, but One-on-One seems like decades ahead in graphic advancement. Compared to Atari Basketball, which also featured two players, the game play of One-on-One has sophisticated movement. It's an extraordinary upgrade."

One-on-One didn't miss a trick. It features "Hacking" fouls called by a diminutive ref, traveling, 24-second shot-clock violations, instant replays (believed to be a video game debut), turnaround over-the-head baseline jumpers, 360-degree pirouettes in the lane, fallaways, putbacks, plus the sartorially correct vintage kneepads, accurate non-NBA jersey numbers, and, depending on your vantage point, rec-specs. There were also nifty audio details: dribbles that sound like a metronome, swishes that sound like rustling leaves, and a referee's whistle that sounds like nails on a blacktop.

"I'm an entertainment designer, it's what I do. I knew if we got Erving and Bird you already have built-in dramatic tension," says Hawkins, who currently teaches entrepreneurship and leadership at UC-Santa Barbara, and mentors men in recovery at his local rescue mission. "We kept the layout simple, half-court with a three-point line, so we could use all our animating power on these two spindly guys and their advanced moves. We wanted the shooting to be realistic, the matchup to have organic flow, and to have the attacking and defending be authentic, so you couldn't just run into a player and nothing happens. Physics had to be accurate. We also added the feature of making the jump and the release of the ball, at its apex, two separate motions. It was the game's most beautiful feature. I used it later with the John Madden 'Oomph' button."

As smooth as the gameplay was, there is one glitch that runs contrary to the popular collective memory of One-on-One. As it was being created, a young undisciplined developer was tasked with using accurate shooting percentages for Bird and Erving to highlight their individual skillsets. He failed to do so, which means they both have the same moves. It's true. Dr. J. didn't dunk more than Larry; Bird didn't make more threes than Erving.

Still, the legacy of One-on-One endures. Sure, it's graphically antiquated when stacked up next to the just-released NBA Playgrounds (which, side note, looks awesome as hell), but its hip-hop vibe is as relevant as ever. EA's statement game dropped right as rap records moved beyond the simple party songs that defined the genre's early years. It was released the same year as Kurtis Blow's "Basketball," which named-checked both Erving and Bird, and came hard on the heels of Grandmaster Flash & the Furious Five's classic "The Message." One-on-One's packaging shared the gritty graffiti-strewn, baked-asphalt Rucker Park ethos of the song that took hip-hop in an entirely new direction, capturing the hard realities of urban living. The lettering looks just like the chalk scribblings on Gotham's streetball meccas. You could totally see The Get Down crew playing it at Shaolin Fantastic's crib.

Electronic Arts cleaned up. In 1983, One-on-One sold for $40 and reached No. 2 on the Softalk magazine bestseller list. (Over the long tail, it kept selling at annual sales cycle reductions to $30, $20, $10.) Hawkins estimates the original version sold more than a million units, with sales numbers of several million over its lifespan. It paid off for the Atlantic Division foes, as well. Both Erving and Bird signed deals for $25,000, and a 2.5 percent royalty rate, according to Hawkins. Dr. J. also got a bit of company stock, a perk not offered to his Indiana counterpart.

In return, the Larry Bird and Dr. J helped turn EA into a powerhouse.

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How Dr. J and Larry Bird Helped Build a Video Game Empire published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv

[wait-what-no-way]

Interview with GOOMBA

When did you start writing GOOMBA?

I've been writing since early childhood, I moved around a lot and felt a need to let people know that "I was here". Naturally I switched my name and developed my style over the years until about '05 when I finally felt I had an established identity. Which I stuck with consistently for about eight years. During that time, maybe around 2008, I came up with a character to represent the name. Somewhat of a mascot, often acting as a shorthand throwie. In about 2013 it was brought to my attention that the streets were under the impression that the name and the face were a duo and not the same writer, so I decided to roll with it, and I separated the two. At that point I had to give my character a name that the streets could associate him with. It isn't a monkey, and it isn't a human. Interestingly, it's a cryptic self portrait of myself, so the name GOOMBA came naturally. I carried two names for a few years, before dropping the other completely, and sticking with GOOMBA.

That's super unique, I don't think most writers would have thought of it as a self portrait.

Big ears, big ears, big nose, big mouth, and heightened senses. He's ugly, but you can still love him. I don't consider myself from this world, and I’m a goon. People are always surprised when I tell them its me, but after getting to know me they can really see it.

Who has influenced your style over the years?

It's tough to say, I'm really disconnected from the world, and try not to be too influenced. Surprisingly however, Keith Haring’s bold and generally curvy line work had always influenced me and I think that comes out in a lot of my work. I didn't always do characters, but coming up in the 90′s, I was always impressed when I saw graffiti characters. You know not everyone could pull it off, and it really wasn't common, but I felt like it really added something. You have these letters that maybe you can read, maybe you can't, but then you had a bboy spritzed next to it and it was like, “Aww shit,” that's fresh. In the early 200′s I’d see these production walls, all these fresh pieces, and then EWOK would tie it all in with all sorts of wild characters. I mean the guy would smash letters, but he was "the character guy" so definitely a huge influence early on. Writers like KEYS, RATES, UFO, CLAW, TWIST, and BONER, really let me know that a character can actually SPEAK your name. At that time, it was very rare in graffiti and definitely tough to be accepted. So those names are huge inspirations to me. I'm big into location, I can say that influence came from coming up and seeing heads like NARK and DRUNK ONE, KID and PK, DYRECT, and at that time the whole ACC CREW (they had uptown fire escapes and roofs on lock.) I remember these guys had the heaven spots, the forever spots, the "How the fuck?" or "What the fuck was he doing here?" type spots. I love that shit, and it lives. These days, I'm influenced more so by my peers and cats that are non-stop pushing the envelope. For example VEW, DISTORT, the WHOLE AIDS CREW, GROPE, and MECRO. I see serious innovation of graffiti through their work, and to me it influences the whole game to keep pushing for bigger, badder, and better.

That's what's up! Characters a few years back were few and far between. What type of spots do you prefer to hit? A lot of writers prefer trains, trackside walls, etc... Or would you say you have a well rounded preference?

I definitely stay well rounded in what I hit, but my intent is to live beyond my years. With that in mind, spots that are too hard to get to so they don't bother trying to buff, will live past most beef, and escape that one toy that didn't do his homework, doesn't know his history, and will end up writing on, are definitely my preference.

What's one of the highest spots you've ever hit?

I believe it was the water tower I did in my segment of the counting sheep collection. It was about a 40 story climb that took about 20 minutes.

Where else have you had an opportunity to paint outside of New York? Outside of the U.S.?

Of course the boroughs, Long Island, all over upstate, obviously New Jersey, the surrounding states, Pennsylvania, Connecticut, Massachusetts, and I was in Colorado for a decade. I'm always bouncing around, but unfortunately I haven't gotten to do a lot of major traveling and I've never left the states.

As a writer of course your main medium is spray paint, but do you other mediums do you enjoy using on a canvas or black book?

I use whatever I got, any paint (oil or acrylic), ink, or rock will do. My canvases and blackbooks tend to be a mixture of such.

Word, mixed medium pieces are always a blast. How did you get involved with the Unusual Suspects art show?

The past few months I've been putting a lot of time into experimenting with different canvas works, and getting them out there showing in various forums. I think people are starting to notice that, and recognize my versatility. So I've been getting a number of offers and invites to show work, which has been a huge honor. My buddy, who I've been building with for a while now and who I really think understands my drive, LOSTO (Get Lost Alot) was co-curating the Unusual Suspects Show along side MOR1, and reached out to me about a month ago prior join the line up. It turned out to be a really great show. (Big up and respect to GET LOST ALOT and MOR1.) Speaking of which I had my first gallery showing at OKAY SPACE, 281 n 7th st in Brooklyn, February 14th along side 10 amazing artists, for a 3 week exhibition called REAL LOVE. It was an incredible show.

What's one of the most wild experiences you've ever had getting up?

I've got a lot of good ones, but one stands out the most as being by far the most intense, and let me preface that there's no real way to understand just how nutty it was without actually being there feeling your adrenaline pumping... On what turned out to be the coldest night recorded in the winter of 2014 me and my brother SERVE(R2B) took a train out to Jersey to link up with the homies LUCK28(C2C) and ESEF(SFG) and smack some highway spots. We started kind of early, by about 1:30 A.M. we're wasted. We had already grabbed a few nice underpasses and we're going for another one. The way it worked was, we had to drive to one city on the opposite side of a river to park up, walk these train tracks BACK across the river to where this intersection of highways meet and cross. We hit the underpass (the trestle of the tracks we just walked,) then the four of us go back up to the tracks and start catching some hangovers on the trestle facing traffic... A car pulls over on the side of the highway down below, So we're all kinda peeping over the edge seeing what's good. We look up, and we see badges in the distance coming towards us on the tracks from the other side of the river (the direction we came from) and the chase began. It's now probably 2 A.M., and this is where things get hectic. When we left the car we were all amped up, drunk as fuck, came out of our car toasty, planning to bang this spot and go back to the car no problem. So we had left all of our shit in the car, jackets, loads of paint, beers, all sorts of paraphernalia, as well as our phones. So we start running down the tracks, opposite the way we came, SERVE and ESEF are ahead of me, I glance back, and I see my man LUCK28 getting cuffed, and others were hit on our tail, so I boogie, and catch up to my other two homies. We jump off the tracks, run down a highway, cross some other highway, and we’re realizing that there really isn't anywhere we can run without being spotted, and we were already seeing police cruisers and lights. We really had no clue where we were at the time, so we just slid behind some bushes along the road, laying on the ground in a position to see the street, almost right next to the street, catch our breath, and see if things would sizzle out... For about 10 minutes we were good, just watching as cops kept cruising by down different parts of these roads that we could see, when suddenly a cop car pulled up right in front of us, we weren't sure if he could see us or not, but we saw him, and we weren't going to give him the chance. I looked at ESEF and said “We out,” we all booked it, SERVE and I went one way, ESEF went another. Never saw him again that night. SERVE and I ended up in an apartment complex, basically surrounded by highway, we're in hot pursuit, but staying one step ahead of the coppers at all times and really not being seen. Before we knew it, the place was swarming with cops and we really had nowhere to go, so for the next few hours, it was the most intense game of cat and mouse. We couldn't stay in one spot longer than 10 or 15 minutes at most. I mean as soon as we dipped from one spot we would literally see them at that spot with their flashlights. It was freezing, we had no phones, no grasp of time, no idea what to do. All we saw was police car after police car, frantically searching the streets, boots, walkie talkies and flashlights spot lighting and casing the area. It was nuts. I remember thinking to myself at one point, not knowing how long this was going to go on for “Maybe just go get bagged and at least not freeze to death,” I WAS SO FUCKING COLD. I then quickly retracted that thought with a second thought of, "FUCK THAT,” at this point, they're going so hard to find us, they've already invested this much time, on foot, in the cold, etc. I don't even want to know what they might actually do to me if they DID catch me, they'd hit me with something a lot harder than a charge." I've seen several people get stabbed in front of officers and soon as the assailant took off, the cops pursued for about a block before shrugging their shoulders. So to me this was bugged out, like I legit forgot what the fuck we were even being chased for, it was so wild. I felt like we were on the run for catching a double homicide. It made no sense. There was one point we were laying up against a fence and we could feel the ground this officer was stepping on, on the other side of the fence. He was Inches from us, but on the other side of the fence. If I farted in that moment, this story may have gone in a completely different direction. There were moments where the action would slow down, you wouldn't hear much movement or see anything, and we'd almost think it was safe to start heading out of the apartment complex and start trying to figure our way home, but sure enough it would always pick back. For hours this went on, SERVE and I just straight skilling the situation, mad stealthy, on our commando A-game. When finally, the sun started coming up, at that point we finally knew what time it was, about 5:40 A.M. approaching 6 A.M. It got a little tense because now we were losing the cover of the shadows and darkness, soon enough people started walking their dogs, and people began waking up and going to their cars, so we took that opportunity to hopefully blend in and get on our escape route. So we did. Now we're walking, no longer in "hot pursuit" and let me remind you, We just went through some serious shit. Like REAL REAL stick ‘n move chase type shit, no break time just go. We are still freezing, but the sun is helping and this is the first real moment that we even get to speak to each other. Immediately we recognize that we really held it down as a team and that it took both of us being on our A-game to make it through that situation, it was a real moment. We still weren't sure what happened to ESEF, but we were out, unscathed, free, and we crushed it. We walked seven miles to the train station, ended up getting home for a victory blunt a little past 11 A.M. Turns out, both the other homies did get bagged, and the police were sweating them hard on who we were, and going ape shit trying to find us all night. Two city police departments, highway, AND railroad police were all chasing us, which ended up making sense because it felt like an army was after us. Long story, but it was a long night.

I could legitimately picture that entire story in my mind. The fact they had two city police departments look for you is nuts.

Technically four. Yeah, they got the car, and EVERYTHING in it... Hot pursuit started at roughly 2 A.M. went on for almost five hours, and a three hour walk. That changed a lot for me. I knew after that, what I was capable of.

How did you get involved with C2C?

Back in '08 I was living in Denver. One of the first people I met and clicked with was this Rastafarian cat, MOTA. We shared a lot of similar ideologies, world views, and it turned out that he wrote as well. So we became real tight, real fast. We spent just about every day building our styles together, we'd hit the streets just about every night, from 10 P.M. to sun up. He'd show me the ins and outs of the Denver graffiti scene. This dude really knew and respected the history out there, and I respected that. I'm similar, because I know my history very well, I understand the do's and the don'ts, I know the who's or who nots. I'm about gaining and sharing knowledge. I've been in the game for a while, and I've always walked with respect regards to my surroundings. That's what we were about. We made a lot of moves, and we held each other down. At the time we used to have black book sessions day in/ day out, hangin’ at my crib with a couple other homies. FRESH who was originally coming from Cali, KUPA or KOOPA who was originally from Arkansas, and later on TEQ who was originally from Michigan. None of them pushed crews. But we were a team. MOTA and I had both pushed crews at one time that both sizzled out. We were both doing our thing, and we knew we had to form a name for ourselves so that people would know that we comin’ strong. But we wanted to be careful, we didn't want to start a gang, and we didn't want our mentalities to stray from our original and conscious ideologies...

C2C is naturally a misfit crew, although a few of us did, we didn't all grow up together, and being that our team was from all over, we called ourselves City2City/Coast2Coast... We rocked with it, put everyone in our circle down, we were a family beyond graffiti, so there were a few homies that didn't write, but they were down. C2C was growing, and making a name for itself, so other variations of the name evolved, Come2Crush, Combine2Create, Can2Can, Crew2Crazy, and wherever the fuck else you can think of... Originally it was CTC, but I think we either caught wind of another CTC crew somewhere in outer space. Sometimes we'd put a 2 instead of the T, but either way we switched it to a number two so that it didn't confuse anyone. Originally it was MOTA and I as presidents. OCAS, EGONE(who wrote WERD at the time), FRESH, CRILZ, KUPA, TEQ, DREW MILO, DOWN, and MANZ. MOTA retired from president, so its just me, OCAS is VP. Some heads stopped writing, some heads stopped repping, and there have been some that have been added to the roster. Big up my C2C family, big up our newest member to the family, ORDER C2C LOR!

Word, that's rad! It's wild how you can start a crew, and before you know it, it becomes way bigger than you expected. How do you think the internet has impacted graffiti?

The internet is gift and a curse. I believe that there's a time and place for everything, and anything in moderation. That being said, You can definitely use the internet to your benefit, but you have to be honest with yourself in order for it to not work against you. The internet has a tendency to confuse the game, people tend to misrepresent themselves, those people are often lead on to believe falsified boasting, it's perpetual to some degree. Everything I know I learned either through experience or it was passed on directly from "big homie", people that I actually looked up to because they had the knowledge that came from experience. These days, no one needs to respect you, no matter your age experience or rep. You know why? Because they can find out on the Internet, or they already looked it up, so "what can you show them?" There's no more patience to wait to learn, you can google it. Then comes "well shit, let me post myself so people see that "I do this" even though you might not really even do this. Again it's not what you do, it's how you do it... So you can say to me “Well you post your own work.” True, work that has already been seen, flicked, and reposted. So take it how you want but it's done in good taste and it works because I'm honest with myself. I know my roots, I know the tools of today, and I use them with integrity. Then you have direct accessibility to anyone, anywhere. I'm talking anyone can order the next "graffiti utensil," charge to mom or their artist major tuition. Which at first thought might seem all sweet and convenient, but this opens the "street art " and "I'm gonna write graffiti because I'm young and it's cool," flood gates. There are people running around with with Montana's, and a YouTube tutorial. Spraying shit that pre-internet days wouldn't see the light of day, let alone have the opportunity to be there in the first place. Spots are constantly put on blast. I can go on, but at the end of the day, do you homie. Are you going be honest with yourself, are you willing to do the foot work, can you keep your mouth shut? People don't realize what the internet really is because we're so engulfed in it with our EVERY step. But you put yourself out there and cats get so caught up with their image that they legit lose sight of the quality of their actual online presence that in our day and age translates to a real life cliff-note, or lasting impression. The Internet becomes reality to a lot of people.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years with your art?

Ten years is hard to fathom. I never expected to be here today, so I take it one day at a time. I strive to do better tomorrow than I did today.

Anyone you want to give a shout out to?

Yeah I got a few brothers and sisters I wanna big up, shout out the whole C2C family, ORDER, DREW MILO, LUCK21, OCAS, SERVE, WEE MAN, GIVE, J8, MANZ, DOWN, my man YAEO and MOTA out in Denver. Big ups my brother VEW GI the tri state killer. My big uncle, FORS44, out in Cali. My brother AREST KIDSET. Big up my sister J8, killin’ the sticker production game, if you haven't already, go check out STICK EM UP INC!! Shouts my guys Garden State Extracts! Big up all the OGS that laid the ground work.

For those interested, First City Project will be hosting an art show March 2nd at 6 P.M. 149 Glen Str. Glen Cove, New York. This show is open to the public! Food, drinks, music and art! 

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