#i know virtually no one follows me here but after about 30 messages sent to tumblr staff that all went ignored

[vtforpedro]

long, long health update - tw in tags please read them

I am going to speak very frankly about suicidal ideation; please don't read further if this is triggering for you ;3; but please know that I love you I had my follow-up appt with my neuropsych on monday to go over my results and whatnot. it was virtual, and I was in the middle of a head episode and I told her I wasn't doing well, but within about 5-10 minutes, she was saying I should probably go to the ER lkajflaj I guess it looked pretty bad lmao anyway I told her all the reasons I couldn't. medical trauma, being dismissed b/c I have doctors who manage my headaches, and I know it's not life-threatening even if it is 10/10 agonizing, so why are you here. they're so dismissive. she said that they have medication to possibly help break the cycle of constant migraines but I've been treated with those before and they didn't do shit migraines are secondary to iih. it's the iih that needs to be fixed ._. she said I still deserved to not suffer and that the ER is very strict about keeping covid patients away from other patients and I didn't have the heart to tell her they intubated a covid patient 10-15 feet away from me last time I was in an ER 😭 anyway so the results. she said she wasn't worried about anything going on that was concerning or indicating something wrong in my brain. I DID score quite a bit lower for someone my age on information processing (which is exactly what I said I was struggling with to my two neuros who were both like ehhh) and some issues with memory but they weren't super specific and so it could be something neurological, could be my migraines and constant agony lmao, could be my Emotional State. could be all of them at once, I suppose ;) she went into more detail about some of these things but it was the two questionnaires I filled out that were HNNN. so once all the data is entered from like 300 questions it shows a good look into my personality and perceptions and all that and it makes a cool little graph (OR SO I THOUGHT). the kind that looks like mountain peaks. so she points at the one that is waaay higher than the rest and nearly touching the top of the box and she's like 'do you see this one' me: yeah 😬 her: this is your feelings and ideations about suicide me: 😬 😩 😬 her: when I see a score this high, I stop what I'm doing and I call the police to have them escort you to a hospital me: 😬😬😬😬😬 her: but I didn't do that. because when we spoke in office you told me you felt this way and why you don't do it. you told me it's something you've lived with for a long time and the pain you are suffering is what makes it so bad. and I trust you me: 😭😭😭 okay her: do you see this line down here? this is people who have suicidal ideation recorded on this test. you scored 98% higher on suicidal ideation compared to people reporting suicidal ideation HNNNNNN. she said it probably wasn't surprising to me and asked me if I was safe again and all that. I assured her I was and said in my previous appointment; I've had suicidal thoughts since I was like 12? maybe earlier. there have been very few times in my life not surrounded by abuse and trauma so I'm never really free of it. I've had four traumatic incidents causing increasingly horrible episodes of ptsd in nine years. all through my 20s. still here woo, lol and she said she knew that and had a patient not long after my first appointment who had similar circumstances in their life. and they told her it's almost a comfort having it. cause I was saying it's in the back of my mind at all times and I won't do it, but yeah, it's always there. anyway she said they said the same thing; it's always there, always in the background as 'hey I'm an option!' even though we aren't going to harm ourselves. it's a comfort knowing there is an option even if we plan on never using it? idk it just spoke to me and I felt it in my soul we talked about some emotional stuff after and I cried and it was a thing. it felt really good to speak to a psychologist who, just as she was in the first appointment, seemed genuinely concerned and wanted to help

me. I told her I was ready for therapy and she said she'd already looked for therapists for me lkasjdlkja and gave me a group that I emailed yesterday. I don't think they'll take my insurance but she said to message her through the portal if they don't and she'll try to find someone who does I don't remember if I mentioned it, but since she knew about the head shit before I met her, she dimmed her office lights without asking if I needed it and like as soon as we started the virtual visit, she leaped up and dimmed them and said she should've thought about it before the appt 😭 (I keep my brightness really low on my computer and use the warming feature 24/7 on comp and phone and my apt is really dimmed but it still helped a lot when she did it) she kept saying 'you did nothing wrong. it was the choice of others to do what they did. you don't deserve to carry their choices. you deserve to be able to hand it back to them. you don't deserve to be in pain. you did nothing wrong. you deserve to be free of what they did and you deserve to not suffer in such physical pain' I'm so wary of doctors but I really like her and I feel fortunate to have been referred to her ;3; speaking for a long time and especially emotionally is hard for me, so I might try to do two sessions a month once I find a therapist and see if I'm ok with that. trying to keep everything virtual while delta is out there I read her report and her official diagnosis is uhh really strong for major depressive disorder, severe. and severe ptsd with disassociative symptoms so!!! I claimed both of those on my disability application and the person handling my claim told me when I had this appt to call and let her know because she wanted the info. I signed a release the day I was there when I told my neuropsych that cause MH stuff is different than other medical records. she said she faxed it to the woman handling my disability application but I was gonna call her and ask if she received it and also tell her I have a new neuro so she will probably request his stuff too I called today and her voicemail box is full so lol try again later today's been awful. last night was horrible. got a bill for over $800 from my colonoscopy/endoscopy even though I asked numerous times if insurance was covering it and was told yep, every penny. so I was on the phone with insurance and the surgery center for 45 minutes. insurance seemed confused af but the agent I spoke with got some help from people who handle this stuff I guess finally she told me not to pay it, they're going to send them a letter to get it sorted (idk if this means I won't have to pay it at all or if they're going to try to make it that way. but I think govt insurance, which is what I have, works differently. like doctors kinda have to follow what they say vs. the other way around) and not worry about it for the next 30 days. I'm still gonna worry about it lmao they used a nice scare tactic on the bill that this was the 'LAST AND FINAL NOTICE' despite the fact they've never sent me anything else. my mom and the insurance agent said nah that's just what they do to scare people into paying fuckin love america <3 land of the free. the american dream! greatest country on earth 💜🖕💜 I just don't want it to go to collections and have to fight credit bureaus to get it off my credit so it's not destroyed |: anyway my head hit like 10/10 bad while I was on the phone cause of the talking a lot and trying to PROCESS INFORMATION and stress and also the fucking hold music, which I have to hear in some way b/c I gotta know when they're back on the line hnnnnn bad day. it's 1pm and bad, bad, bad day. bad month all around. I want this shit to stop anyway. I'm sorry about the suicidal ideation talk, but it's important to talk about that stuff. it can get severe but it can also get better. it does, eventually, even if it comes and goes. it always does get better I'm sorry, I also really needed to get this down somewhere. feel like I'm going to explode emotionally AND physically and I need to talk about it. hopefully

soon I'll have a therapist to talk to so I can get a lot of this stuff worked on. got my whole life to chat about so it'll probably take a long time but I'm willing to let it lmao therapy doesn't usually work for me anymore but idk I've had a lot of shit happen in less than two years so maybe it will this time I'm trying! I really am trying if you read this rambling monster, thank you. love you all and please stay safe

#vtforpedro personal #tw suicidal thoughts #tw suicidal ideation #tw suicide #tw mental health #tw depression #tw anxiety #tw mental illness #personal #medical #also she is obligated by law to report suicide risks and right now that's to the police so I can't blame her for that #we desperately need crisis intervention rather than fucking asshole cops but that's just what it is right now

[blogadrianaleite-blog]

O DIA EM QUE PERDI A VIRGINDADE

na internet

O DIA EM QUE PERDI A MINHA VIRGINDADE

NA INTERNET

 Você só perde a virgindade nas redes sociais quando é notado. Alguns têm a felicidade de terem um post super compartilhado, milhares de amigos de uma vez só, mas o jeito mais comum é pela treta (briga virtual).

Briga, um questionamento virtual pesado, com palavrões, ou com ataques e critica pesada ao seu post ou comentário.

 Eu entrei bem tarde nesse ramo.(com mais de 30 anos!) O Orkut era a rede do momento, cheguei a receber o convite, mas os meus parcos conhecimentos digitais, fizeram com que eu nunca entrasse novamente na página que abri, e perdi o contato com a amiga que me enviou o convite.

A minha primeira rede foi o Facebook, que pouco a pouco, em passos largos, devoraria o Orkut.

Minha página era pequena, e até hoje ainda é. Tenho um pouco mais de 300 amigos lá, e pra mim tá bom.

Num post sobre a bagunça dos alunos em sala de aula, citei como era a minha turma do oitavo ano ginasial.

Batalhas de carteiras. Brigas onde a porta da sala de aula foi arrancada entre socos e empurrões.

Também havia o corredor polonês, mas era coisa dos nojentos e metidos a besta do segundo grau. Eles ficavam de costas nas paredes dos corretores. Os distraídos que passava por ali, se fosse menino, da oitava série, (a minha série) principalmente, eram chutados, meninas tinham as suas saias levantadas, vaiadas ou um puxão no cabelo.

 Na minha ingenuidade, disse que a minha escola era particular.

Apareceu um bostinha me chamando de “patricinha”, “filhinha de papai”

Jesus, eu não estava preparada. Não sabia que essas coisas aconteciam por aqui. Pouco tempo depois, o Brasil ficaria conhecido mundialmente como a rede com internautas mais ativos e furiosos do mundo. Somos os reis da zoação, e da fúria também.

 Até hoje, não tenho o costume de responder a esses babacas com palavrões. Se estou com paciência, eu uso argumentos, senão, ignoro.

De início, falei que a minha época de escola, era os anos 80, foi início da decadência escolar pública, onde as escolas ficavam sem aulas por até 6 meses com greves de professores, lembro que os alunos da rede pública, praticamente perderam dois anos com essa farra dos professores, em outro, foram aprovados de qualquer maneira, sem as provas finais, pois não haveria como recuperar as aulas pedidas.

 Que na minha escola, apesar de ser particular, nunca foi de elite. Havia os bolsistas, havia os filhos de faxineiros, zeladores, porteiros, lixeiros. Os com melhores situações financeiras, eram os filhos de donos de boteco e padaria. Tinha um aluno da minha classe, que tinha vergonha do empreendimento do pai: padaria.

E Sim, sofria bulyng dos ainda mais ricos: os filhos de médios empresários, filhos de funcionários públicos, quando estes descobriam que eu era filha de sucateiros.

 Mas ele continuou com suas gracinhas.

Joguei a minha cartada final. Disse que a palhaçada dele não me atingia, mas estaria sim, ofendendo os pais das crianças que ralavam muito para mantê-las na escola. Meus pais principalmente, que começaram o negócio catando lixo reciclável nas ruas.

No final ele aceitou a derrota e disse que eu era uma pessoa legal. Descobri logo em seguida que a minha primeira treta virtual teve plateia. Os comentários seguintes foram sobre nos dois.

Recebi até mensagem no chat.

No dia seguinte outro amigo, pela rede, falou com nossos amigos em comum o que havia acontecido.

 Houve outras, em uma, eu mesmo iniciei a treta. Quando a blogueira comunista postou afirmando que o Brasil é o país campeão em reciclagem de latinha, por termos empresários, sucateiros, que vivem de explorar a miséria do povo.

Virei bicho.

Contudo, sem palavrões , com argumentos, calei a boca da gorda.

Houve hates que me deixaram trauma no Twitter. Demorei a aprender a lidar com a rede. Mas a pior de todas foi a falecida g+. Não fiquei nem um mês por lá. Tudo que postasse, comentasse, era motivo para desrespeito e ataque.

Não vingou. O g+ pra mim foi a minha maior perda de tempo que já tive em uma rede social. Palavra de quem já apanhou várias vezes no Twitter...

THE DAY I LOST MY VIRGINITY ON THE INTERNET

You only lose your virginity on social media when you get noticed. Some have the happiness of having a super shared post, thousands of friends at once, but the most common way is by (virtual fight). Brawl, a heavy virtual questioning, with profanity, or with attacks and heavy criticism to your post or comment.

I got into this business pretty late. (over 30 years old!) Orkut was the network of the moment, I received the invitation, but my meager digital knowledge, made me never enter again the page I opened, and Lost contact with the friend who sent me the invitation. My first network was Facebook, which little by little, in stride, would devour Orkut. My page was small, and to this day it still is. I have a little over 300 friends there, and that's fine with me. In a post about the students' mess in the classroom, I quoted what my eighth grade class was like. Wallet battles. Fights where the classroom door was torn between punches and jerks. There was also the Polish runner, but it was the disgusting and son of the beast of the second degree. They'd sit on their backs on the walls of the brokers. The distracted who passed by, if it was a boy, eighth grade, (my series) mainly, were kicked, girls had their skirts raised, booed or a poke in the hair.

In my naivety, I said my school was private. A little girl came along calling me "missus", "daddy's little girl" Jesus, I wasn't ready. I didn't know these things were happening around here. Shortly thereafter, Brazil would be known worldwide as the network with the most active and furious internet users in the world. We are the kings of mockment, and of fury too.

To this day, I'm not in the habit of answering to these swearing. If I'm patient, I use arguments, or I ignore it. At first, I said that my school days, it was the 80s, was the beginning of public school decay, where schools were without classes for up to 6 months with teachers' strikes, I remember that the students of the public network, practically lost two years with this spree of teachers, in another, were approved anyway, without the final exams, because there would be no way to recover the classes requested.

That in my school, despite being private, was never elite. There were the fellows, there were the children of janitors, janitors, porters, garbage men. The ones with the best financial situations were the children of pub and bakery owners. I had a student in my class who was ashamed of his father's venture: bakery. And Yes, bulyng suffered from the even richer: the children of middle businessmen, children of civil servants, when they discovered that I was the daughter of scavengers.

But he went on with his cute little ones. I played my final card. He said his antics didn't hit me, but he would be offending the parents of the kids who were too much to keep them in school. My parents mostly, who started the business picking up recyclable garbage on the streets. In the end he accepted defeat and said I was a nice person. I found out right after that my first virtual had an audience. The following comments were about in both. I even got a message in the chat. The next day another friend, through the network, spoke to our mutual friends what had happened.

There were others, in one, I started the myself. When the communist blogger posted stating that Brazil is the champion country in recycling can, because we have entrepreneurs, scavengers, who live to exploit the misery of the people. I became a bug. However, without profanity, with arguments, I shut the fat woman's mouth. There were hates that left me trauma on Twitter. It took me a while to learn how to handle the network. But the worst of all was the late g+. I haven't been there for a month. Anything he posted, commented on, was a reason for disrespect and attack. You didn't get it. The g+ for me was my biggest waste of time I've ever had on a social network. Word of those who have caught several times on Twitter ...

#high school #ensino médio #treta #palavrão #facebook #twitter #internet #netvirtua #virtual relationships #virtual life #scool #orkut #g+ #briga #lifestyle blog #blog #blogueiros #school #anos80 #80s

[elsabarnitt]

CASE STUDY - ‘The Book That Grew’ DandAD 2020 Annual Graphite Pencil Award

1.     FRONT PAGE (slide 1)

For my case study I chose “The Book That Grew”, which won a graphite pencil in the DandAD 2020 awards.

On screen is the first image I saw that made me want to find out more, so I thought it was appropriate for it to be the first image you see. I’ll be honest, I only started looking into this project because this image looked cool, and I’ve never seen anything like it before so want to find out more. Looking in further I found high levels of collaboration, thought and a moralistic purpose to help a community become better.

2.     WHAT AM I GOING TO TALK ABOUT (slide 2)

I am going to talk about a book that was grown with the aims to improve farming practises.

Ireland heavily relies on farming as their main source of economic income.

This development of this book was a project which spanned 6-7months and was a collaboration between the Allied Irish Bank, Teagasc; Irelands agriculture and food development authority, Rothco a design agency and the artist Diana Scherer.

In this presentation I elaborate on the creation of this idea, the processes involved, the limitations and the design.

3.     WHY IT WAS MADE (slide 3)

Agriculture accounts for 30% of total emissions in Ireland which is its largest carbon emissions contributor. This can’t continue. The Irish economy is dependent on farming, with 6 billion euros of food and drink specifically reliant upon grasslands for their production. So for this level of farming to survive, it has to become sustainable.

AIB, the Allied Irish Bank has a business relationship with 35% of the farmers in Ireland and therefore this issue is of much importance to them. AIB partnered with Teagasc, who identified 10 tangible lessons and 10 pieces of practical advice to maximise sustainability and increase the profitability. The 10 steps help farmers to achieve a ‘perfect’ 10 rotations of grass grazing per year and produce 10 tonnes of grass per hectare – this is a powerful number that will greatly improve the sustainability of even the most efficient farm.

Hence, 10 being a major theme for this campaign. Which appears in their campaign video as well as the book.

This advice was compiled into a 22 page organically grown book using the very grass that Irish farmers nurture as the medium to carry these important lessons. And I believe this is a perfect example of getting the right message to the right people in the most suitable way.

4.     INTRO INTO IDEA (slide 4)

I contacted the Irish design agency, Rothco via Instagram with a few questions and the offer to have a virtual coffee. To my surprise I got a response and Rob Maguire and Fabiano Dalmacio on the Creative team at Rothco were more than happy to have a zoom call with me.

It was great to be able to hear first-hand, how an agency works with a well-established client relationship to anticipate issues and be able to be proactive about providing solutions. It was also great to explore the whole process and the problems they came across face to face.

From my research I realised they had a long-standing relationship with AIB, and so one of the questions I asked was “Did AIB come to you with a brief, or did you go to them with an idea?”

The answer I received was that: No brief had been released, but Rothco knew AIB was passionate about sustainability and they have a lot of ambitions to do greener work, and knew there was an agricultural brief on its way. They were constantly looking out for things, and said they have a WhatsApp chat where they send ideas to each other at all hours of the day and night.

Fabiano initially came across an article about a visual artist called Diana Scherer who used grass to sustainably make fabrics. His initially reaction was ‘this is really cool, and we have to do something with her’, so they contacted the creative director at AIB who suggested a book or an annual report, because if Diana can grow patterns and textures, she can grow letters and numbers. And from there they contacted Diana to see if it was actually possible, and even she wasn’t completely sure, which shows the risk everyone was willing to take.

Rob and Fabiano were also kind enough to send me photos they had taken of some testers and unused versions. Two of which are on screen now.

As you can see the number 25 hasn’t formed properly.

5.     DIANA (slide 5)

Diana Scherer, a German artist living in Amsterdam, explores the relationship of man versus natural environment. She has come up with a truly unique process, which no one else in the world knows how to do.

She has designed templates which had to be to a specific standard to allow grass roots to grow into them to form patterns. This is called ‘root-weaving’. I got told she is very protective of her work and didn’t show anyone else how to do what she does throughout the whole process.

She has a lab in Amsterdam where she curates her work, which is where the pages were all grown.

6.     LIMITATIONS (slide 6)

The Rothco Design Team went out to Amsterdam to visit Diana to learn about the limitations of her process. One of the main limitations of the technique she has created is that everything has be connected in the template.

For example, if there was a font, it all has to be connected otherwise the roots would simply not take to it. As you can see in this picture there are very small lines connecting each of the letters together.

This project was being curated during Winter, which in terms of gardening isn’t the best time. Diana informed the team that growing in Winter versus Summer would have quite different outcomes and urged them to wait, however due to the time limit Rothco were under they weren’t able to wait but had to make it work in Winter.

From the moment it was harvested the pages started to die. Due to the nature of the project the team decided against using a preservative as that went against what they were trying to achieve. Because of this they decided to have a photography project running alongside it so that you could capture what it looked like the moment It was harvested.

Another limitation was that the size of the page. This really mattered as that would be a deciding factor of how big the typography could be and therefore how legible it was. They decided on 11 x 17 inches, which is roughly the size of an A3 page.

7.     GRID SYSTEM, FONT, SYMBOLS (slide 7)

Due to the constraints I have just mentioned, the design team had to come up with a way to display all of the information in the most efficient and understandable way. They ended up condensing all the information they needed into a grid system inspired by the farmers fields using symbols to tell farmers what to do instead of words. I think its also important to say each page was set out to mimic the yearly calendar to make it easier for farmers to follow.

To the right of the screen I have displayed just a few of the symbols they used. The middle one being one of their field diagram designs.

Top left means Soil

Top right means fencing,

which I’m glad they have a key because I never would have guessed these otherwise.

When on the Zoom call with the creative team I asked what Type style they used and they couldn’t remember, however through one of the images they sent me after our call there were hints that it was ‘Helvetica’, and since comparing the book to this font I am almost certain it is.

SWITCH SLIDE (slide 8)

This is a close up of one of the pages to show you what the symbols look like in the book. Letters were also used as a symbol, for example the T and the F stand for Test and fertilise.

8.     TEMPLATES AND DIANA CHECKING THEM (slide 9)

As spoken about on the previous slides, getting the right size and making sure everything was connected was vital. Therefore, it wasn’t as easy as just choosing fonts and point sizes from a printing point of view, but you had to do it from a gardening one as the pages would grow pixel by pixel. Every time the design team would finish a template, they would send it off to Diana for her to then check it over and see if there was anything wrong with it.

An example that Fabiano gave was that they had some numbers on their templates and Diana would say ‘the size of the zero, you need to increase that otherwise it is going to close in on itself. If you wanted that circle edge you need to make it bigger’.

With this kind of collaboration and exchanging of information the outcome just kept getting better.

SWITCH SLIDE (slide 10)

Here is an image of a digital template beside the root woven version of itself.

As you can see the root woven version on the right hand side isn’t as legible as the digital version. The roots aren’t as bold and perhaps as structured as white is against a black background, however as they were working with nature, it was okay for it not to be perfect, and for the letters to not form 100% accurately.

9.     BOOK BINDING (slide 11)

The book was grown in Amsterdam and was being bound in Dublin by letter press printer and bookbinder Jamie Murphy of the Salvage press.

Each page took roughly 2 weeks to grow and then were all sent separately by courier. As this book is the first of its kind, one of the main challenges was finding the best way to bind it. Jamie was given several test runs that had failed to practice binding with. Everything was so delicate which you can see from the picture on the screen now so special techniques had to be used.

A challenge that Jamie faced was that Rothco were persistent on everything being made out of grass as keeping it as pure as possible was very important to them, so despite Jamie asking for some plastic features he had to find another way to do things.

Jamie burnt the grass in order for it to find a new life as an ink, and also used it to make more pages to act as dividers in the book to protect the delicate pages. Even the cords that hold the book together are made from bamboo

This all demonstrates that when a material such as grass is managed correctly it can work wonders.

10.  CHANGE (slide 12)

The Book That Grew toured round Ireland, and was given the title ‘The best Grassroots campaign of all time’, with the main event being the National Ploughing Championships.

I have been told the book had a very good reception there as well as the knowledge that some farmers have already implemented some of the lessons within the book.

I think that this project has huge relevance in today’s society as sustainability is becoming a top priority for a lot of businesses.

I started off this project with the impression that this was cool, however after researching further no wonder I thought this as it is the world’s first, every page, every word, and every diagram in a book to be formed by real grass roots as they grow. An aspect of this project that has really stuck with me is the fact that you had to wait for the book to make itself as opposed to being able to physically make it and therefore patience was key.

After speaking with Rob and Fabiano on the Creative team at Rothco, I saw the human aspect behind the project and saw the good that they are trying to make which is something that has really inspired me. It is bigger than just its typography which is what it won the award for.

REFLECTION

- I have found this case study project to be very helpful and very interesting. I feel as if I have learnt different ways to find out information as at the beginning of this project I found it quite hard and was coming across the same information over and over. Something that I think had hugely benefitted me was getting in contact with the design agency RothCo and I am so thankful they took time out of their day to speak with me. 

BIBLIOGRAPHY

https://www.lbbonline.com/news/aib-releases-worlds-first-book-literally-grown-from-grass-roots

https://musebycl.io/makers/agency-grew-book-out-grass-support-irish-farmers

https://m.bizcommunity.com/Article/196/614/210434.html

https://marcommnews.com/aib-and-rothco-release-beautiful-new-book-literally-grown-from-grass-roots/

https://www.irishtimes.com/sponsored/teagasc-making-money-by-watching-the-grass-grow-1.1619570

https://www.thedrum.com/creative-works/project/rothco-aib-the-book-grew

https://www.thestable.com.au/rothco-aib-grow-a-book-entirely-from-grass-roots/

[randomwritersview]

cybersecurity

"Ping" rings your mobile. You reach out and check for that notification. Wait what? 

"40,000 has been debited from your account". No god this cannot be true.

One side of your mind asks "what did you do bro?" 

The other replies "bro I didn't do anything!". 

Okay wait now what ? Inform parents?

duh,that's the last thing we do!

 Cyber crimes! oops, scary. Okay let me start. Nah don't want to show you a pie chart or some percentage with perhaps two decimal places like you are going to remember it all. I'll tell you a story. A story that sent chills down my spines and it started this way.

A team wanted to do some research on cyber bullying .So they faked a 30 years old woman as a 15 years old and posted pictures and what happened next? She received a lot of messages. Oops should I call it DM? Posh. 

Anyways what were those texts? Well most of them were censored, so you can imagine what kind of texts those were and guess what? Such texts were received within a minute she created that fake account. Later she replied to all of them like how a teenage kid would. I just wanted this story to end because I was already disturbed by those texts and later one among those guys asked her to meet him at a place. Oh my god. I do not know what made me shiver at that moment. Just like how some people cry or laugh watching a serial picturizing themselves in the actor's or actress's position and at that point I felt the same way. So now how to meet this guy? The lady there was 30 years old and making her look like 15  was quite a job. Well there's make-up you know. Soshe was ready and they met. He spoke rubbish which was again censored and all I could hear was beeeppp. Later he compelled her to come over to his place but as expected she kept refusing. 

The video ended here. Okay what else do you expect? A hero to pop out and punch this guy? Nope that doesn't happen in real life. People do get injured and face trauma for the rest of their lives. Not just the trust on social media is lost but faith in the entire humanity is being questioned. Who should be blamed? The victim or the accused? The parents of the victim for not teaching her how to be cautious or the parents of the accused for not teaching him good manners. Whatever the matter is, whomever you blame, at the end of the day the victim suffers and suffers in such a way that she wants to undo all this, may be press Ctrl+Z but just can't do that and at last you know what she does? Ctrl+D to her entire life.

When a guy says” baby I'll protect you” or when a brother says “I'll protect you sister”, that's heroism but when the same guy harms someone else that is supposed to be OKAY. Why? Couldn't she be someone else's baby or someone else's sister? So it all means your baby must be protected but someone else's?

 Nahh who cares.

  Let’s jump to another story.

You want to move into another home and hence you need someone to help you with lifting, transporting ,etc. So you go online and search. You find a site where the ratings are 4.7/5 and isn’t that awesome? But wait, you dig deeper and find that it’s very expensive. Well, we all hate spending right?. I mean we demand for branded shoes, branded bags(okay forget,that's a secret) but for transportation and stuff? Waste of money, isn’t it?

Now what? You search for another website and wow, you just found another company whose prices are reasonable and you give all your information, close your laptop and inform your parents not only about the final cheaper company but also about the previous costlier company and how greatly you found this god gifted website. Somewhere deep in your heart you have that immense joy that you just saved a fortune. So yes, people come and start helping you with the lifting and loading it on to their trucks . You tell them where your new house is and they say "ma’am shall we unload  these in your new house?, you take rest ma’am and come within an hour, no worries". Man, how good are these people. So you tell them to move and perhaps after an hour you go there and find out the truck has just vanished. You wait and wait, nope yet nothing happens.  Suddenly you have an idea  “why don’t I open the website and contact them?”.

Wait! the website disappeared too? Now  what?

Hell of a story isn’t it?

 Another trend. This is a bit funny one. I personally receive texts, almost every day saying 'you have won 20 Lakh rupees, please contact us'. You know, when they say so, I actually feel proud that all of a sudden I became rich, just like that. 

And what's more funnier is that some believe it innocently and send their information thinking they actually got lucky. 

And you know what's the funniest? There are a few who know all this is fake yet for their curiosity or must I call it adrenaline, that makes them want to give it a shot. First they say ‘just deposit 5000 we'll transfer 20 lakhs to your account’. 5000 isn't a huge amount is it? or should I tell 5k to make it shorter? Anyways, these so-called "smart " people deposit 5k but you know what, you can actually just tell them to cut 5k out 20 lakhs and tell them to send the rest. 

Okay forget, that doesn't work.

 So by doing this tiny step you fall into a huge trap and rest we all can imagine. Nobody gives you 20 lakhs for no reason,remember that. I mean we all are not that lucky that some random person comes out of nowhere and be like "hey keep this 20 lakhs bro.full on party you do okay!". No no that doesn't happen or I’ll  give another example. A random girl calls you up and she be like "sir my friend had taken my phone number to send some OTP but accidentally he interchanged the last two numbers which happened to be your number. So sir can you please forward me that OTP which you received? sorry for this inconvenience sir and thank you for your time" Wow when someone speaks like that, she can't be fraud right? I mean come on she just called you 'sir' and she said an awesome reason and at last 'sorry' and 'thank you' too. She must be a literate person and when a girl addresses you as 'sir', that's next level. Hold on. Don't you dare think that way. She just narrated an amazing grandma tale and you believed it like a kid, like how we all thought that there's an actual rabbit on the moon. So the question is whom to trust and whom not to? Well, that's your problem. Because when the cheaters are getting smarter you can't use the same 70's technique that "I will be a good guy and help everyone". That will definitely drown you.

   But why is there less awareness or shall I say ‘more ignorance’ regarding such disturbing crimes?. We all think that this might not be a big issue like how murders or rapes are, even though people do lose lives in cyber bullying just like how they do in murders or rapes.

cyber crime or corruption, due to limited laws or due to ignorance, could be like rust, you can and will ignore them initially but one day you will fall ,as they might not be rapid but that doesn't mean that they do not do their job. I feel that rather than changing laws we need to bring a change among us. There are already so many laws and you know, our country’s constitution is one among the best ,yet why are there crimes? Earlier for rapes ,penalties were put later laws changed and death sentences were generally given to the accused. So now there’s a new “trend” these rapists have due to this law. They burn the victim so that no evidence could be obtained and they could save themselves from being hanged. Hence it becomes difficult to obtain samples if the body is burnt. Remember I told you earlier no  matter what, the victim suffers at the end. At least she  could have survived if she wasn’t burned. So yes, we can make laws but first we need to change. More than change, I’d like to say we need to become more generous ,responsible and all other ‘good adjectives’.

Now, how can I prevent all this from happening to me? What should I do if I'm already going through all these? Friends, please do understand that all instances I have written  above are related to  money, except one and that one is actually a very sensitive issue. So if there are any victims among the readers, I would like to say one word 'communicate'. There are people out there who can help you, even if there's a fault from your side, it's absolutely okay. It’s absolutely okay to be wrong because it was all a trap, which may be ,you didn't figure out. So if there is someone who you really trust let them know. It could be anyone, your parents, teachers, friends, etc. They'll surely take careful measures without making it a big issue, if that's what you are scared of. So please communicate. Whatever happens suicide is not an option guys. Every problem has a solution if properly tackled and also remember ‘we have more days to live than the days we have lived’. Hence you can correct any mistake or solve any problem.

  Cyber crimes are not about computers, it’s about the behaviour, both yours and theirs.

 and do not trust someone blindly. She might have the sweetest voice or he might be the most handsome man yet DO NOT trust. Their techniques keep getting updated but we should not fall for them. Virtual world is absolutely fake. Though some may have millions of followers on social media, yet they  do commit suicide because of lonliness. . So counting your friends in numbers makes no sense.

So, you may have hundreds or thousands of followers on Instagram but that doesn't mean you have them all when you need them and nobody knows how many are fake accounts among them. So do not fall for someone's profile and take a step further because you are unknowingly falling into the trap on your own.

   So here I’ll be ending my essay. To be frank, I have not used any fancy words to show off  my terminology. Isn’t a spelling bee contest here. Moreover I wanted to make you understand what I wanted to say and if I was successful in it, I am really proud. Proud that  I made at least a few aware and perhaps safe from the threats they may face someday. Remember,Patriotism isn’t shown by putting status or sticking flags on vehicles for one single day. Show it by not doing such crimes or by helping our own country men by preventing them from falling into such traps. Rather than just be an Indian ,let us all be responsible Indian and work for the betterment of our nation.

JAI HIND.  

#my first blog #showsomelove #randomwriter

[weemsbotts]

The Giving Tree Near Dumfries: The Treasure Map Filled with Family Memories and Clues

 By: Lisa Timmerman, Executive Director

While many people are drawn to Dumfries to check our extensive genealogical records, Allan L. Davidson came with a map from his deceased father. The clues: “From Dumfries follow the bed of an old narrow gauge railroad-rails and ties removed to an old mine dump cross brook and follow dirt road back past two shacks until it fords creek and find tree in right opposite corner.”

During WWI, Allan Davidson’s father, H.F. Davidson, served as in the U.S. Marine Corps, spending a few months at Quantico before deployment to France. He used the opportunity at Quantico to look for a tree that J.R. Hoy (Allan Davidson’s great-grandfather) and J. Murray carved their names into during the Civil War. Once located, H.F. Davidson drew a map and carved his own initials into it, relating the story to his family and saving this precious map. Let’s  join Allan Davidson in 1997 as he headed to Dumfries police station meeting with then Lt. Charles Reid.

“He wanted to go with me on the search but couldn’t get away. He sent me to see Joe Calpin who has a “tourist trap” – Old Mine Ranch, an Old Mine Road; Petting Zoo for the kids and horseback trail rides.” In fact, one of his trails follows the old railroad bed. He, too, showed great interest and took me by foot – not horseback – to the old road bed. We followed this for about half a mile to the old mine dump, and crossed Quantico Creek on stepping stones without getting our feet wet…

We headed back downstream. The old road and two shacks my father referred to are no longer in existence. In a hundred yards we came to a spring run into Quantico Creek. I couldn’t decide whether this was the second creek referred to or not. In crossing this “creek” all we could find was a stand of old pine trees and almost impossible briar bushes. Not a beech tree in sight.

I was about to give up, conceding to time and nature, but Joe encouraged me on, telling me that we were then on Prince William Forest National Park land; and to go talk to the Park Rangers. This I did, Jacque LaVelle, a park ranger, found an old topographical made early in this century, which showed the old dirt road and two shacks; and more importantly, the South Fork of Quantico Creek about four hundred yards downstream from the bramble bushes I had been in earlier. The park rangers graciously took me in a four-wheel-drive vehicle down a private park road to near the confluence of the South Fork and Quantico Creek. At a point about seventy-five yards upstream on the South Fork where there was a faint semblance of an old road, we forded the South Fork – again on stepping stones. And there was “the tree” in front of us; right where my father’s map said it was! Nothing succeeds like success! My ingenuity never ceases to amaze me.

Time has made the carvings all but illegible. You can pick out a letter here and there by stretching the imagination to see what you want to see. After all the carvings are 135 years and eighty years old. But I am confident that we found the right tree. At least I will always think we did.”

The family researched the movements of J.R. Hoy knowing that he enlisted in the 144th Regiment NY Volunteers Infantry relying on James Harvey McKee’s Civil War Record book and research. They could place Hoy near Dumfries. They also tracked the movements of  three other family members serving in the Union Army: George Davidson (72nd Regiment of the NY Volunteers), John Davidson (89th Regiment of NY Volunteers), and Thomas Davidson (144th Regiment of the NY Volunteers). The Davidson family have faithfully served the country throughout their history. While George survived the war, John died from injuries suffered during the Siege of Suffolk (04/11/1863 – 05/04/1863) and Thomas died at the battle of Honey Hill, S.C. (11/30/1864). H. Fletcher Davidson served in WWI in the Verdun sector receiving the Good Conduct Medal, Silver Star, and the French Croix de Guerre. (Side-note: Cher Ami, a carrier pigeon, also received the French Croix de Guerre after delivering numerous crucial messages, despite significant wounds from gunfire). Allan Davidson served in the Air Force during WWII and the Korean War. 

So, did Davidson add his name to the tree? “My response “Not very likely with two park rangers standing behind me. They take a dim view of people carving up their trees!”

Note: Starting your holiday shopping early? Consider purchasing an HDVI membership for your family and/or friends! Memberships come with free use of our Lee Lansing Research Library and alerts to our programs, such as our free virtual November Member Cookie Swap (prospective members welcome)!

(Sources:  HDVI Archival Files: The Tree by Allan L. Davidson; Smithsonian National Museum of American History: Cher Ami)

#family history #local history #parks #research #genealogy #treasuremap #civil war #world war 1 #familymemories #folklore

[wenevergotusedtoegypt]

Today just...was not great. It was the first day of my husband’s semester and he had a class from 9-11 that was prerecorded, and a class from 1:30-5:30 that was live on Zoom and he had to have his camera on and be there the whole time. So since our no-longer-babysitter had said she’d be willing to do some part time hours this week, I decided to send the baby there from 2-5:15.

I spent a bunch of time in the morning when I couldn’t concentrate that well on work anyway trying to find new leads on childcare. Nothing particularly promising.

When we first got to the babysitter it seemed like things were going to go really well. I went into another room to set up his bed there and he started crying, but then I came back and got him set up with some Cheerios and he perked up. I left the room again and he didn’t cry, so then I came back and said goodbye.

What was supposed to happen was he’d eat his Cheerios and some cheese, digest/play a bit, she was going to take them on a walk, they’d get back by 3:30 and he’d go down for his nap. I wasn’t sure how he was going to handle that in a new setting, so I told her to do his pre-nap routine, let him cry for up to 15 minutes, go in if he was still crying and comfort him but not take him out, wait another 15 minutes, and if he still wasn’t asleep at that point I’d come pick him up. So basically by 4pm either he should be asleep or I should be on my way to get him. If he hadn’t fallen asleep we’d be home by like 4:30 and he’d have plenty of time to nap here, and I would continue working during that.

I asked the babysitter at 4:08 if he’d been able to fall asleep, and at 4:10 she told me he was awake but they got home late so she hadn’t actually put him down for his nap until 4:05. So fantastic, he was already starting out with the disadvantage of being overtired. At 4:18 she sent a message that he was “winding down but still crying” and asked if she should take him out. I took like 5 minutes to see my phone and by that point she had already done so, without doing the check-in. At that point it was already so late that if she tried again he wasn’t going to have a very long nap by the time I came to pick him up (I CALCULATED WHICH HOURS I WANTED HIM THERE BASED ON HIM HAVING TIME FOR A NORMAL LENGTH NAP BEFORE PICKUP, which was totally ruined by them staying out past his nap time, but anyway) so I said I would just come get him.

When I got there she seemed kind of traumatized by the whole nap thing. Their baby falls asleep by herself but I guess they did something other than Ferber, I don’t know. She said she felt so bad hearing him cry (yeah I mean, so do I, but) and suggested that maybe next time he should just skip the nap because he didn’t seem so tired even in the stroller on their walk anyway. Meanwhile she’d sent me a video at 3:16 of him in the stroller where i could already tell he was tired...and when I started walking home he fell completely asleep in less than 5 minutes (he didn’t even wake him up when I bumped the stroller up steps....and normally if he falls asleep on a walk it takes like 45 minutes and he wakes up the moment I bring him inside). So not only did he not get his nap there (which may or may not have happened no matter what with the new environment), but she didn’t listen to my instructions AND she’s apparently terrible at reading him. 

Unfortunately when we got home he woke up when I tried to transfer him to the crib, but even though he’d only been asleep maybe 10 minutes he would NOT go back to sleep, and we gave up after 45 minutes because it was getting too late.

Between packing up him and his stuff and walking there and back twice, I basically spent an hour and a half of my workday getting him there just for less than 2 hours of work time, then couldn’t even work after I got him home because he never took that nap.

I feel like it’s not even worth it to bring him there again tomorrow. If the babysitter isn’t going to follow my instructions for nap time he isn’t going to fall asleep, and I don’t want to keep going through this trying to get him to adjust when this is a very temporary situation anyway. 

But also my husband is going to be out of the house for class for like 5.5 hours of my workday tomorrow, and even most of the time he’s home he’ll be in virtual class and only of limited help. I CAN’T DO THIS. I need help. I feel like I have no decent options. My dad is offering to fly out here and ignore the legally-and-scientifically-mandated quarantine, my mom is suggesting I fly to them and leave my husband behind indefinitely since he has to go to class (I have literally spent ONE night without him in the past over 22 months we’ve been married and it was the night after I gave birth and was still in the hospital and it was Shabbos and he went home for the shalom zachor, and that was after fighting tooth and nail trying to get the hospital to release the baby and me before Shabbos, there’s no freaking way I’m doing that even without the pandemic in the picture).  I keep seeing articles about how women are at a disadvantage during the pandemic with being forced out of their jobs due to lack of childcare, but I can’t even freaking choose to quit my job because I’m the sole breadwinner, and there’s nothing my husband can do to increase his availability. I’m at a loss here.

[skia-oura]

Closing Costs

A/N: Just a fun lil fic about the Ben Trio going house hunting :)

ao3

___________________________________________________

CORDALINE GABLES

Senior Sales Associate

[email protected]

Phone  HomeStar Inc. Messaging

 Originally from Fairfax, Old Jersey, Cordaline Gables made her home in Norfolk over a decade ago, and has worked in real estate for nineteen years. She double-majored in Business and Transcendence-Age Architecture at the prestigious University of San Antonio. Her expertise is in finding gems hidden in the crooks and corners of suburban Norfolk, but she is additionally skilled at scouting lovely apartments and homes further away from the city center. When she isn’t matching clients to their dream homes, Cordelia enjoys playing recreational badminton with her partner and taking long walks together with their beloved dog, Sniffles. Please place your trust in Cordelia!

Audio Version             Non-English Versions             Font Adjustment

 -

 New Automated Message: New Customer Application Form

NAME: Torako Lam

PARTNER: Yes [2] ; NAME: Bentley Farkas ; NAME: Tyrone Pines

CHILDREN: No

AGE: 27 ; DOB: June 17 3016

PHONE  EMAIL

PRICE RANGE: Up to $350,000  flexible inflexible

LOCATION: Within [75]km from [Niklakka Labs]

SIZE: 450—600 m2

BD: [3+]        

BTH: [1.5+]    

K: [Yes]          

LR: [No]

GRG: [No]

BY/GDN: [Yes]          

à SIZE: 125—175 m2

ADDITIONAL REQUESTS HERE:

--No dimensional subspaces

--Away from magically-charged hotspots

--Customizable Security Systems

--Garden Shed on premises, please

--Large Windows a Plus

Thank you for accommodating us! We look forward to hearing back about the properties under your purview and making our viewing appointments!

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: Hello from Homestar Realtors!!

RECEIVED: July 19th, 3042

 Dear Torako Lam,

           It’s a pleasure to make your virtual acquaintance! My name is Cordelia Gables, and I’m your HomeStar Inc. appointed estate agent. I look forward to working with you and fulfilling your needs in this new chapter of your life. I have attached a list of five properties that I think may fit your needs. Please view them with your partners and let me know if there are any that don’t fit your specifications so that we may get them out of the way before viewing the homes in person. I await your reply at your earliest convenience!

 Sincerely,

Cordelia Gables

HomeStar Inc. Realtors

 House Profile 1/5:

1345 16th Avenue

Norfolk, VA 68C 22980

4 Beds  | 2 Bath  |  529 m2  | $298,000

[49 img]

 A lovely four-bedroom family home, this property includes high-quality faux-wood flooring, recently renovated wallboard, and a lovely spiral staircase straight out of a 2500’s property magazine. The kitchen boasts a brand-new stove and oven set as well as a state of the art StayFridge™ made from the finest recycled materials from North Africa. The front garden is already blooming with the loveliest daphnes, and the entire property is fenced in by rosebushes. The backyard is perfect for the smallest feet, whether those be of children or beloved pets. Don’t forget the stylish and practical EverExpanding Cabinetry installed in every part of the house—you will never run out of storage space! Each bathroom boasts a shower-tub combo, and the upper floor bathroom comes with gorgeous hand-tiled floors.

House Profile 2/5:

195 St. Phillip’s Crtwy.

Norfolk, VA 68C 22980

3 Beds  | 3 Bath  |  501 m2  |  $311,000

[12 img]

 This three-bedroom, three-story property sits in the center of the city, a mere five-minute’s walk from two elementary schools and ten minutes from the nearest junior high school. While the original structure dates back all the way to 2258, its most recent renovation was completed less than five years ago in 3039. You are certain to love the open kitchen-dining-living room setup that comprises the bottom floor, leaving the remaining three beds and two baths on the upper two floors. Each bedroom has a Magical View Window, with settings that include worldwide destinations as well as the default ‘Real’ setting for those who prefer to stay close to home. Comes with a Laundry Room in an AltBasement. Gardening space and shed included.

 House Profile 3/5:

98 Summer Estates 29¾ th St.

Norfolk, VA 68C 22981

5 Beds  | 2.5 Bath  |  598 m2  | $253,000

[28 img]

             Don’t let this house’s exterior fool you! This customizable and generous home is sure to make you feel a sense of belonging inside with its cozy ethically-sourced carpets, warm ReelWoodTM paneled walls, and burnished staircase leading to a second floor. This home includes a basement for any storage needs as well as an attic! An antique kitchen with a real non-stasis fridge are sure to fill you with longing for older, simpler times away from the busy heyday of modern life and modern worries. While the garden needs some tender love in the front (perfect for those who love a project!), the back hosts two sheds and plenty of space to grow your own produce!

 House Profile 4/5:

637 S. Felicity Dr.

Norfolk, VA 68C 22982

4 Beds  | 2 Bath  |  645 m2  | $290,000

[118 img]

             Comfortably situated in the hilly outskirts of Norfolk, this property will let you live out all your rural life fantasies without sacrificing the conveniences of urban living. Located close to a municipal transport station and within a ten minute’s bike ride of a small neighborhood shopping center, this two-story house boasts an expansive front porch and a balcony off the master bedroom. Each bedroom is larger than average, and each bathroom has a shower/tub room separate from the toilet and wash sink. The kitchen is recently renovated with state of the art appliances included in the price of purchase. The grounds around the property are large enough for both a garden and for outdoor activities such as badminton or good old fashioned tag. A basement provides adequate storage space without the hassle of dimensional subspace installment or upkeep.

 House Profile 5/5:

12841 NE 112th Pl.

Norfolk, VA 68C 22981

3 Beds  | 1.5 Bath  |  398 m2  |  $215,000

[56 img]

             Boasting a reasonably large garden, this cozy home is at the southern end of the city, within convenient distance of a major hospital, a police station, and several schools. Public transportation is not an issue! And neither will be cooking in the quaint kitchenette, set directly across a furnished dining room. One bedroom and half bathroom are on the bottom floor, and the remaining rooms are located on the second floor. Please see the attached images for more information!

 -

 July 19th

KoraTora

I’ve forwarded you the message the realtors sent me. Objections to any of these before I comb through them for my own preferences?

 DipTipTyrone

i still vote we just shack up with the sheep

 KoraTora

Oh my stars dips that’s

we agreed that’s not a possibility

we would literally go insane

 Bentley:

No, we would go mad almost immediately

Yes what Tora said

Um, looking at them, House 1 is out for sure. You sure you specified no extra-dimensional subspaces?

 KoraTora

You know I did

 DipTipTyrone

i got a perfectly good house up there. antique. ud love it. historians dream. excellent neighbors too. dont pry. no drama.

also protip house3 has some srs bad vibes. I think I actually recognize the basement wallpaper, on second thought.

 KoraTora

????

 DipTipTyrone

Yeah, that striping—oh, that was a pretty good one. Didn’t need to answer a call for the following five years.

 Bentley

In that case, I think we’re not going to do house 3, Tora.

 KoraTora

Ohshit

Whaddya mean, Ben?? Don’t want to live there?? It could???? Be fun!!!!

 Bentley

Yeah no

 KoraTora

Roger that, no worries.

So no to 1 and 3, any others problematic?

Oh wait Ben, u might want to take another look at 2 if u haven’t already.

 Bentley

?

What do you mean, it looked fine?

3 stories are good by me

Sure the counters in the kitchen are ugly in the photos but?

 DipTipTyrone

AltBasement and Magic Windows

u wont like them

 Bentley

Oh

Okay, then 1-3 are all out. You good with 4 and 5, Tora? Dip?

 KoraTora

Yeah I hated 2’s counters too

So I’m good with checking 4 and 5 out for now.

We can always see others after this too!!

 DipTipTyrone

youre the ones actually living there

 KoraTora

Don’t u start on that mister

ur living with us, even if you’re not always around

 Bentley

It’s gonna be your home too, you know

Anyways, I can make time for an appointment next week, Tora, so don’t worry about timing on my end too much

They keep trying to send me home early anyways. Keep talking about PTSD and resting and whatever.

 KoraTora

What happened??

I will drag you home

And lay on you

And make you rest

 Bentley

Nothing happened!! They’re just worried

All the time

…Dipper you did not show up at the front desk.

This is not a good place for you

Dipper

 KoraTorako

Dipper yes!!

But also no!!!!!!

 DipTipTyrone

We’ll be home soon.

Love you.

 KoraTorako

<3

But also that was dumb shit you just pulled

 -

Appointment Notice

7/21/42

SSA: Gables, ID 980039385

CLIENT: Torako Lam +2, ID 64239

PROPERTIES: House #4428, House #6609

START TIME: 10:30, from HomeStar Inc. HQ

END TIME: 12:30, SPECIAL ALLOWANCE Late Lunch Hour, Gables, ID 980039385

NOTES:

Will initially view House #4428 before venturing out to the outskirts of Norfolk to view House #6609. Hopefully one suffices; if not, consider suggesting Houses #1103, #4345, and #3327.

Potentially choosy clients.

 -

 Shari Ndadia, 11:28 AM

Cords, I heard you’re back early?

What happened?

 Cordelia Gables, 11:29 AM

My intuition was right, they are uncannily choosy clients

We didn’t even make it into 4428 before one of them stopped still and said ‘No.’

 Shari Ndadia, 11:29 AM

Holy shit

What??

What was it?? It couldn’t have been the exterior. It was so nice in the pics I’ve seen.

You always snatch up the nice ones.

 Cordelia Gables, 11:30 AM

Apparently

The InvisiFence was too magical

 Shari Ndadia, 11:30 AM

What the?

But, like, almost all the houses in Norfolk proper have InvisiFences?

 Cordelia Gables, 11:30 AM

Exactly

Which is why I thought ‘oh thank God we’ve got 6609, no InvisiFence’

And it went well at first, but then I told them about the security system

And the tall one was like ‘oh no’

And I was also like ‘oh no’

 Shari Ndadia, 11:32 AM

Wait

Wait

You’re still at square one with these clients?

 Cordelia Gables, 11:32 AM

Yes.

 Shari Ndadia, 11:32 AM

You? Queen of Sales?

She Who Strikes Yes On At Least One Initial Property?

 Cordelia Gables, 11:33 AM

Like I said: choosy.

 Shari Ndadia, 11:33 AM

What was wrong with the security system?

 Cordelia Gables, 11:33 AM

Not customizable

Though to be fair

They probably were only going to give that house a maybe

They weren’t too thrilled about the stasis fridge

 Shari Ndadia, 11:35 AM

…choosy.

I wish you luck with them. You going to go through our backlog of communal properties yet?

 Cordelia Gables, 11:36 AM

I’m not that desperate yet.

 -

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: Issue with Client Lam [64239]

RECEIVED: July 30th, 3042

Mx. Pinkflax

           I regret to inform you that I have truly exhausted all of our listed properties for Client Lam and her partners. They have refused everything I have offered; I wonder myself if the property they want even exists within Norfolk. Between their confusing and adamant disdain for any kind of dimensional subspace (including things as mundane as storage spaces) and their insistence on customizable security systems, as well as their avoidance and hesitance around any kind of technology that involves stasis in any way, shape, or form, it has been impossible to fulfil their needs with the properties available to us.

           My suggestion moving forward is to either assign them to another Realtor within HomeStar, or to transfer their entire application to another company. If I recall correctly, you are on friendly terms with Lindquist Realtors. Perhaps something in their directory will suffice.

 Sincerely

Cordelia Gables

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: RE: Issue with Client Lam [64239]

RECEIVED: July 30th, 3042

Cordelia,

           Are you sure there’s nothing? You’ve gone through the communal backlog? I’ve looked over the application and I have some thoughts. What about House #7421? Or #8577? They’re a bit above price range, but I believe they could work.

 Olive Pinkflax

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: RE: Issue with Client Lam [64239]

RECEIVED: July 30th, 3042

Mx. Pinkflax,

           With all due respect, I have met with this trio every day for the last week. I dug into the backlog. I have recommended over 50 properties and shown them about a third of those. I was close with #4443, but the damn pet flap and subspace pet room killed it. If I don’t get a break from dealing with these very nice, very terrible clients, I will explode. The brown haired one has taken to very poorly concealed laughter whenever the hoodie-mask one refuses to set foot on the property. I cannot.

           If you have ideas of properties that would suffice, please be my guest. It would be nice to get back into the practical side if things, wouldn’t it?

 Sincerely,

Cordelia Gables

 -                              

 OLIVE PINKFLAX

Senior Realtor

[email protected]

Phone  HomeStar Inc. Messaging

 Born and raised in Norfolk, Olive Pinkflax hasn’t always wanted to be in the real estate business. They studied History of Architecture and Design in Georgia at the University of Savannah with the intent of pursuing a career in either graphic design or interior decorating. They then went abroad to work at non-profit agencies for a total of five years—in which the job market back home changed, largely at the fault of the Recession of 2978. Due to a lack of job openings, however, they eventually took a secretarial position at UniqNorfolq, a small real-estate business. There, they learned the tools of the trade due to insufficient staffing. By 2995, UniqNorfolq had become HomeStar under Pinkflax’s capable hand. While still small, they have grown the company into a name synonymous with quality, perseverance, and dedication to their clients. When not busy at their company, Pinkflax enjoys painting at home and doting on their pet rat, Squeakums.  

Audio Version             Non-English Versions             Font Adjustment

 -

 Client Transfer Notice, HomeStar Inc. Realtors

7/30/42

CLIENT: Torako Lam +2, ID 64239

ORG SSA: Gables, ID 980039385

NEW SSA: Pinkflax, ID 980012114

REASONING:

Client Lam and her partners have proven to be challenging cases. As this is the case, I have decided that the current best course of action would be to handle their properties personally. Attached to their case file are a list of all the properties that they have been recommended and shown, as well as notes describing their reasons for discontinuing interest. I am open to collaboration and ideas.

Pinkflax

 -

 July 31st

KoraTorako

We’ve been transferred to another Realtor at HomeStar, guys. Apparently it’s the owner of the company.

Bentley

I was afraid this would happen.

We’re being so picky.

DipTipTyrone

Better to be picky now and end up with what we want later!

A quickly made deal is always worse for the receiving party. Better to bide our time.

KoraTorako

Yeah, what Dip said

Also, of course we’re picky??? We’re traumatized.

We’re allowed to be picky, even if they don’t know why.

Bentley

I mean…I could live with a subspace we’d never use, I guess

KoraTorako

No

DipTipTyrone

No

Bentley

Why??

It’s my hangup

KoraTorako

You’re already compromising on stasisware

Bentley

We can always replace that!!

KoraTorako

So?? It still makes you super uncomfortable for completely valid reasons.

I still think we shouldn’t compromise on that.

Bentley

If we didn’t compromise on that

There would be nothing in Norfolk

I’m starting to think there is nothing with our current demands

The house on Clement was cute, wasn’t it? It was nice!

DipTipTyrone

It had the subspace pet flap

Bentley

That we’d never use!!

KoraTorako

You looked ready to start sparking

Or glittering

And also you had that ‘I’m on the edge of reexperiencing all of my recent traumas’ face on

Bentley

If I can deal with everything in daily life

I can deal with a pet flap

KoraTorako

But it’s our home

You shouldn’t have to deal with it at home

This is supposed to be a safe space.

DipTipTyrone

Home isn’t daily—ok Torako got me.

Bentley

It’d be better than the apartment we’re living in right now

Which

If you remember

Is where I got kidnapped from

DipTipTyrone

I do keep mentioning we can live with the Sheep

KoraTorako

You make a fair point, Bentley But also, this is a house we’re going to be in for a long while

Let’s make it worth it, ok?

Bentley

I

Fine, whatever

KoraTorako

I don’t want us to live here either

If we need to we can, I don’t know, AirDrop an apartment for a couple months

Keep our stuff in the apartment so that we don’t have to move it all immediately

We can make this work, Ben. We can have our steak and eat it too.

…

Bentley?

 -

Appointment Notice

8/03/42

SSA: Pinkflax, ID 980012114

CLIENT: Torako Lam +2

PROPERTIES: House #7421, House #8577, House #2468, House #1697

START TIME: 12:30, departure from HomeStar Inc. HQ

END TIME: 15:30, departure either from House #1697 or from HomeStar Inc. HQ in best case scenario

Starting with Houses #8577 and #7421 on the very outskirts of Norfolk, we will work our way into the center of town where both House #2468 and #1697 are located. None of the properties have any listed subspace technology integrated into the premises, none of them have magically-powered fences or windows, and only one comes equipped with a stasis fridge. Will make offer to replace fridge with an older but still highly functional device free of charge if the property is accepted.

 -

Client Profile Update

DATE:8/03/42

CLIENT: Torako Lam +2 [Bentley Farkas, Tyrone Pines]

CLIENT ID: 64239

CLASSIFICATION: Buyer

SPECIFICATIONS: Listed below

…

PROPERTY RECORD:

SSA: Gables, ID 980039385

 House #1212: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: Extra-dimensional installations and heavy reliance on Magitech Appliances. [detail: Kitchen Appliances, Cabinetry]

 House #3958: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: Extra-dimensional installations and heavy reliance on Magitech Appliances. [detail: Alternative Basement, Windows]

 House # 2249: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: Basement wallpaper and house history. [detail: 2950’s owners were heavily involved with the Cult of Futures Past, Decorative Preferences]

 House #4428: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Heavy reliance on Magitech Appliances [detail: InvisiFence surrounding property. Client Farkas refused to cross the boundary, saying “No” nearly immediately. Apparently sensitive to magical energy. Caution moving onwards is advised.]

 House #6609: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Security System installed in the property is incapable of being customized. [detail: Client Lam has expressed that a non-customizable security system is out of the question. Furthermore, Client Farkas expressed discomfort with the Stasis Fridge. Caution moving onwards is advised.]

 House #1033: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: Interior did not align with Client Decorative Preferences. [detail: shag carpeting, loud wallpaper, windows too small]

 House #3290: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: Security System installed in the property is incapable of being customized.

[detail: Client Lam somehow pieced together the security code engraved around all the doors and windows, researched it, and discovered that the code is unalterable without starting over completely from scratch. IE, a warding expert carefully sanding down the inscribed code and then re-installing it to customer specifications. The House Profile has since been updated. Client Lam has since expressed that she would be open to having an initially insecure home to make secure herself. Uncertain if actually qualified to do such work.]

 House #5533: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Household Electrical Wiring is too reliant on MagiTech. [detail: Client Farkas, again, expressed his distaste with the whole affair immediately upon entering the house by saying, “No,” and walking out again. How he noticed the wiring through solid wall is a mystery for the ages. Sensitivity to magic alone cannot explain it.]

 House #7567: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Interior did not align with Client Decorative Preferences. [detail: Upon seeing the decoratively engraved floorboards up close, Client Pines recoiled and uttered, verbatim, “The day I spend any significant amount of time in this accursed home is the day I lay waste to the whole of humanity.” Apparently the script contains excerpts from the original Twin Souls literature. Housing detail has been accordingly updated.]

 House #2675: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: Interior did not align with Client Decorative Preferences. [detail: Apparently, Clients Lam, Farkas, and Pines are not fans of rooster-themed kitchen décor.]

 House #1181: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Basement too reliant on MagiTech and extra-dimensional subspace technology. [detail: The basement was a secret basement. Client Pines stared at the living room floor for an uncomfortably long time before raising his head and telling the SSA, “You might want to be careful opening that.” Property Owner has since been alerted and advised to proceed with caution.]

[UPDATE 7/29: Property has been pulled from the market while police reopen a case and conduct an investigation.]

 House #4482: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: Interior did not align with Client Preferences. [detail: 3 bedrooms minimum is non-negotiable and the bathrooms were too cramped]

 House #5319: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: Interior did not align with Client Decorative Preferences. [detail: They don’t like the color of the walls. Note to stay away from overly bright greens and yellows in the future.]

 …

[scrolling]

…

 House #5497: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: House Address. [detail: like many other clients before them, the prospects of living at 6969 Dickinson Straightway appear to have caused the clients to decline this particular property.]

 House #9569: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Building Materials not up to Client Standards. [detail: After showing the clients around the property for fifteen minutes, Client Lam hummed, squinted her eyes at the nearest window, and said, “Does that window look like somebody could break through it to you two?” The next five minutes were spent by Clients Lam and Pines discussing the fragility of triple-reinforced glass against various potential weapons, tools, etc {not limited to but including demonic powers, a bazooka, and a thumbtack} while Client Farkas sat down on the floor, put his gloved hands over his face, and muttered a nearly unintelligible “I’m sorry” to presumably the SSA. These clients are hopeless.]

 House #4443: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Pet Flap and Pet Room are too reliant on extra-dimensional subspaces. [detail: Client Farkas stared at the pet flap, turned around, and put his hand on the SSA’s shoulder before saying, “No,” and walking out. Housing information has since been updated to include the unlisted Pet Room.]

 House #3944: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: Unclear. [detail: Client Lam, in the emailed response, simply said, “Look, we’re all tired and this house is too square(?) for {Client Pines}, so we’re just gonna give it a couple days before trying again.”]

[SSA is going to file for a transfer of client.]

 SSA: Pinkflax, ID 980012114

 House #7421: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Distance.

Detail: Too far from nearest transporter station.

SSA Comments: Clients appeared pleased with most aspects of the house. As per SSA Gable’s consultation, Client Lam appears most concerned with matters of household security. Client Farkas is harder to read, due to constantly wearing sunglasses, a hoodie, and a surgical mask despite the weather, but does not hesitate to make his opinions clear. Client Pines is…a mystery.

 House #8577: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Décor, House Layout, Location.

Detail: Housing does not come with security, but the spackled walls and ceiling are apparently difficult to do the variety of warding Client Lam is used to. Layout is, according to Client Pines, confusing. House 8577 is also apparently on the edge of a minor magical hotspot, as Client Farkas has confirmed.

SSA Comments: The difficulty in getting the clients a suitable home is evident. Client Farkas appears to be the biggest wildcard, despite his consistency in what he refuses. There simply does not seem to be a reliable way to ensure that the properties will not set him against them and are simultaneously up to other standards shared by all three clients.

 House #2468: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: House Size, presence of Extra-Dimensional Subspace, Décor.

Detail: At 780m2, the premises were too large for upkeep. While Client Pines seemed to disagree, offering to do more cleaning in exchange for snacks and ice cream, both Client Lam and Client Farkas weren’t convinced enough to ignore the décor (the elaborate crown molding is too “ostentatious” and “creepy,”) and certainly not when the non-disclosed extra-dimensional subspace was discovered in a false wardrobe.

SSA Comments: After the clients left, I investigated. Inside the subspace, kept pristine likely only by the fact that time does not pass quickly within those places, was an additional bed and a luxurious bathroom. The style of bedsheets and drapes indicates that the subspace was installed nearly a century ago, which seems odd seeing as subspaces in those days were unstable and tended to disintegrate. On a different note, this time it was both Clients Pines and Farkas who balked at the presence of the subspace. Take note to pay more attention to reactions in the future, and to survey properties properly before visitations.

 House #1697: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Security System.

Detail: Client Lam disagreed with the validity and effectiveness of the existing security system, and upon a close study of it (25 minutes), declared that it would be too difficult to properly alter and that removal would only be slightly easier.

SSA Comments: I would pay for the removal myself if it made these clients buy the house. There were no other issues with it. Upon my making the offer out loud, Client Lam laughed and said, “No, no, that’s all right! I’d rather find something a little more ready first!”

 House #2292: Declined w/o viewing.

Reasoning: House Layout.

Detail: House is built like a townhome, with a main room and bathroom on each of its 5 levels; Clients professed concern regarding the kitchen being on a separate floor from the living and dining room.

SSA Comments: Unfortunate. The building fit all of their specifications—the security system installed is simple to both customize and remove, there are miraculously no extra dimensional spaces on premises, and the only significant presence of magical technology in the entire property is the mailbox, which can be replaced at a very low cost. We investigated ourselves. Client Lam, their partnership’s point of contact, did say that it was a close call, but that ultimately they would only purchase when completely satisfied.

 House #1357: Viewed, but declined.

Reasoning: Décor.

Detail: Client Pines felt the colors were too ‘smorple’ and ‘floreen’ and several other descriptors that do not appear in any dictionary. When asked if he had noticed the issues when viewing the profile sent to them, he confessed that the colors simply ‘were different in person.’ Client Lam agreed that she didn’t appreciate the tile flooring in the kitchen. Client Farkas was quiet.  

SSA Comments: I hate to admit it, but I know a lost cause when I see one. Do they even want a house?

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Attached: ClientRecord64239.qbf

SUBJECT: A Professional Request

RECEIVED: August 7th, 3042

Dearest Qilar,

             I hope that this message finds you well. How is your family doing? I (and Squeakums, for that matter) look forward to our bi-weekly dinner and movie. I know you’ve discussed that the last full moon has left you feeling worn out, and I look forward to relaxing with you for a night.

           I write this message in the hopes that you would be amenable to taking on a client of ours. Unfortunately, we have been incapable of finding a property that would completely satisfy their desires. We have exhausted our listings. I know that you have several properties in Norfolk, and even those close to major terminals outside of Norfolk. I also know that you like a challenge.

           Attached is the client file for your information. Names and personal information have, of course, been redacted. They will be readable upon your agreement to take these clients on. The clients have of course been notified about this possible course of action. Should you decline this case, I would be more than understanding.

 Well wishes to you and yours,

Olive Pinkflax

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: Welcome to your experience at Lindquist Realtors!

RECEIVED: August 10th, 3042

 Dear Ms. Lam,

           Hello. My name is Qilar Lindquist. You and I have not had the pleasure of meeting, but I am sure that when we do, it will be wonderful. As you may know, my good friend Mx. Pinkflax conveyed to me their concerns that they didn’t have the property best suited to you in their register. However, with access to a larger company such as Lindquist Realtors, they hoped that you would have more success. If you are still obliging, I am more than happy to take you and your partners on as clients of Lindquist Realtors. It would be thrilling to find you the house you and your partners have been dreaming of. Please respond to this message as soon as you are capable, so that we may begin the process.

 Sincerely,

Qilar Lindquist

Lindquist Realtors

 -

 QILAR LINDQUIST

Senior Realtor

[email protected]

Phone  Lindquist Realtors Homepage

Alternative Display Options

             While not born and raised in Norfolk, Qilar Lindquist has been settled in this fine city for the past 20 years. A born werewolf, Qilar has always wanted to follow his parents’ footsteps. He succeeded as well, opening up a new branch of Lindquist Realtors in Norfolk at the tender age of 28. He studied business, architecture, and chemistry at the University of Des Moines. Intelligent, quick-witted, and charming, Qilar Lindquist is dedicated to serving his clients in any way he can. Outside of work, he is involved with the local community theater and can be found volunteering at various non-profit goodwill organizations around the city. His husband often joins him in these endeavors.  

 Back to Realtor Biographies Homepage

 -

 August 13th, 3042

Chat with Saint Akuapem

6:36 PM

Thank you for the scones the other day. Hepsa enjoyed them.

So did I.

How is house-hunting going?

6:59 PM

Sorry, still working that Thompson case.

Thanks for working with me on it.

And the house hunting’s not going so great.

7:12 PM

Of course. You’re bright. I like hearing your input.

Just not situated to be a public officer of the law.

What with your friend.

7:13 PM

I know.

7:13 PM

I’m sorry to hear it is not going as well as hoped.

Would you like to talk about it?

7:14 PM

The realtor company you recommended couldn’t find anything for us

So we’ve been transferred to another realtor.

7:15 PM

Nothing? Really?

What realtor?

7:15 PM

Yeah, nothing. Lindquist Realtors.

7:16 PM

Hepsa says they are good. You are in good hands.

7:16 PM

Yeah, we had our first house hunting today.

I’m just worried it’s going to go nowhere here as well.

7:18 PM

Sorry for saying but. I find that hard to believe.

You will find a house.

What are your specifications?

7:19 PM

Ummm 3 BR 2 BTH Defs LDK

450-600 SQM

Garden with like 100-200 SQM?

No Magitech if possible, no exdim subspaces at all

Security system gotta be customizable or not there at all

We can be a little picky with décor sometimes

And house gotta be sturdy

There’s probably something else

7:26 PM

I see.

That would be difficult.

Are you willing to compromise on anything?

7:27 PM

Price. I put down 350k but if it gets me the house I want

Then I’ll pay more.

7:27 PM

Understood.

Where are you staying now?

7:27 PM

Still in the apartment

Got the lease to finish

Hate it but until we have somewhere else

7:29 PM

…how is Bentley?

7:29 PM

He’s stressed.

With the house, and being here

He’s always having nightmares

So tired all the time

Insists on going to work though and I cant talk him out of it

I want to get a house for him

But I don’t want him to have to deal with all the shit he is in the apartment

He doesn’t see himself as important enough to take care of, sometimes

So I have to take that into account

7:32 PM

What exactly is going on, Torako?

How is Bentley not taking care of himself?

7:32 PM

Like, it’s not that I don’t understand where hes coming from

I get that I might be being a bit unreasonable

But he keeps saying ‘oh I can just DEAL with having an exdim subspace in the house’

‘never mind that it’s a huge trigger for all my trauma’

‘and that I sometimes cant stop looking at it just to make sure its still there and im still on the reality side of things’

‘ill just wear my magic-cancelling glasses all the time’

‘and be unable to sleep from the headache’

‘it’s not that big of a deal, torako, let’s have the magitech here that hurts to look at too much’

‘who cares, it’s just a fridge torako!! Not like it was used to TRANSPORT ME to a FOREIGN COUNTRY so that a MADMAN could CONDUCT EXPERIMENTS ON ME to the point that I almost took FATALLY DRASTIC ACTION’

He keeps saying he’ll just put up with his trauma like it’s a minor inconvenience!!

And he shouldn’t have to do that.

Not in a house that’s our own.

7:36 PM

Bentley was what now.

7:36 PM

Oh right

You didn’t know that part

7:36 PM

You went to get him.

7:36 PM

of course

I love him

7:36 PM

Therapy?

7:36 PM

Bentley? Yeah.

Hell of an NDA.

7:37 PM

No, you.

7:37 PM

She’s the only other person who knows everything.

Like, everything everything.

wait what?

7:37 PM

Torako.

I think you’re not doing as well as you think you are.

7:37 PM

Bentley was tortured

I wasnt

7:38 PM

I’ll believe you on that.

But you still devoted yourself to finding him.

And he was tortured, and you have to deal with the consequences of that too.

7:38 PM

???

7:39 PM

You sound stressed, Torako.

And scared.

7:39 PM

Maybe a little

But Bentleys more important rn

7:40 PM

I would say you’re both equally important.

Sorry, Torako, Hepsa is calling me; we’re going to a late night movie.

I’ll keep my eye out for you.

7:40 PM

OK

Thank you

I really appreciate it

 -

 Client Profile Update

DATE:8/15/42

CLIENT: Torako Lam +2 [Bentley Farkas, Tyrone Pines]

CLIENT ID: IMP64239

CLASSIFICATION: Buyer

CAUTION: PICKY, SPECIFIC, UNCOMPROMISING

SPECIFICATIONS: Listed below

…

LINDQUIST REALTORS PROPERTY RECORD:

SSA: Lindquist, ID 109A854D

…

…

NEW UPDATES 8/15/42

 HOUSE ID: 798A 209X

ADDRESS: 389 West Hampton Drive

SELLER: Mx. Adelaide Hanson

STATUS: DECLINED

NOTES: Unfortunately, despite attempts to the contrary, the clients were not impressed with the security system. We discussed it at length at Lindquist Realtors and felt it sufficient, but Client Lam insisted quite sternly that she needed to have full control over the system. RapierSolutions is a top of the line system. I tried to convey that to Client Lam, but she refused to hear sense. “I need to be able to alter it,” she said. “If I can’t alter it, it’s a no-go—especially with those weak windows and the shallow hinges on the entryways.” Mx. Pinkflax was not kidding around when they said Client Lam was a bit controlling over safety specifications. Possible paranoia?

 HOUSE ID: 665D 187L

ADDRESS: 9821 NW 4736 PL

SELLER: Mr. and Ms. Nakatani

STATUS: DECLINED, INACTIVE

NOTES: We combed the premises for subspaces personally. Nevertheless, Client Farkas quietly pointed out that there was a secret bunker hidden under the premises, and that it spanned the entire property. While he hastened to assure us that it wouldn’t be that much of an issue, Client Lam overheard and insisted that they wouldn’t buy any property with extradimensional subspaces. When Client Farkas attempted to tell his partner that they weren’t going to use that garden gate anyways, Client Lam shut him down. Client Pines also wandered over from where he was inspecting the brick wall of the garden, said “This place might be cursed,” and waved his partners cheerily off of the premises.

Upon notifying the authorities as required by law that there may or may not be a curse on the premises, the police shut down the premises. Any attempt to contact Mr. and Mrs. Nakatani beyond alerting them to the existence of the subspace has been unsuccessful.

UPDATE: the extradimensional basement is now the scene of a crime. 665D 187L is now under government jurisdiction.

 HOUSE ID: 278K 396V

ADDRESS: 421 Wildstar Avenue

SELLER: Mr. Fegelhorn and Mr. Gil

STATUS: DECLINED

NOTES: Client Lam, predictably, criticized the ‘astounding lack of security’ in the warding system, the ‘structural instability’ of a perfectly good cellar window, and the presence of a stasis fridge on the premises. Client Farkas was silent. Client Pines said that he ‘liked the staircase’ but that the upstairs bathroom tub was ‘too small for his preferences.’ Naturally, the clients declined the home.

 HOUSE ID: 525P 792S

ADDRESS: 98 Maplefarm S. Street

SELLER: Mrs. Polinski

STATUS: DECLINED, INACTIVE

NOTES: Surprisingly, it was not Client Lam or Client Farkas who had reason to decline the property. This is probably because Client Pines, five steps past the garden gate, hissed and bodily hauled his partners away from the grounds. When asked what the matter was, he snarled out in the most terrifying voice something about unquestionable evil and the screams of the undead. As required by Law, we have notified the authorities.

UPDATE: Property is now under police jurisdiction. Norfolk Government Demonologists and Exorcists evacuated the entire block for a full 48 hours. It seems Mrs. Polinski was being possessed by a terribly old demon, Hyutgen the Voracious and had been for an undetermined amount of time.

What is up with these Clients and finding horrific crime scenes?

-

August 15th, 3042

Chat with Handsome <3 <3 <3

5:28 PM

Darling, what’s up?

You seem to be staying late at the agency today

As of late, really.

Is it The Clients?

5:57 PM

I’m so sorry.

Yes, it is.

This is much more difficult than anticipated.

Olive called it a challenge and I was foolish enough to think I had it in the bag.

The Clients are insatiable.

There’s always something wrong with the properties. Always.

And they keep uncovering properties as crime scenes??

6:03 PM

I’m so sorry darling.

6:03 PM

I don’t know if I can do this anymore, Bayani.

I’m so tired.

I’ve shown them over 30 properties, personally.

6:04 PM

Do you want to talk it out?

I can get your favorite dinner together

We can curl up on the couch

Put on some Strandson

6:05 PM

You know what?

Yeah.

Yeah, that sounds nice.

I’ll be home in 10 minutes.

6:06 PM

See you soon <3

6:06 PM

<3 <3

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBKECT: Realtor Change Notification

RECEIVED: August 16th, 3042

 Dear Ms. Lam,

           My apologies in advance for the contents of this email, though I hope it finds you well. Unfortunately, due to my position as head of company, I am unable to continue being your Realtor. I have transferred you to the care of one of my very capable senior agents. Mx. Ya-en. I hope that you understand, and that Mx. Ya-en can see to your needs better than I have.

 Sincerely,

Qilar Lindquist

Lindquist Realtors

 -

 HARLEY YA-EN

Senior Realtor

[email protected]

Phone  Lindquist Realtors Homepage

Alternative Display Options

             Harley Ya-en, despite xir elderly age of 84, is one of Lindquist Realtor’s most capable senior Realtors. A psychic who can read auras, Harley Ya-en is capable of anticipating the client’s needs and emotions. This allows Mx. Ya-en practical insight into which properties will suit a buying client’s needs. Xe also has a wealth of knowledge regarding the Norfolk area due to living here for the past 50 years, and is a font of trivia sure to satisfy the most curious of souls. Xe lives with xir husband and wife, and enjoys taking road trips—

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: LOL NO

RECEIVED: August 17th, 3042

 Qilar,

           Holy fucking shit you do not pay me enough for this. You have to transfer them. I cannot work with these clients.

Sincerely,

Harley

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: RE: LOL NO

RECEIVED: August 17th, 3042

 Harley,

           What happened?? What did they do??

 Qilar

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: RE: LOL NO

RECEIVED: August 17th, 3042

 Qilar,

           They didn’t do anything in particular. They’re just impossible clients—I’m thinking it’s not even their fault, entirely—and I have read their file. Even with that, I was hesitantly down for the challenge until I saw their auras and interacted with them today. I am Not Doing It. I am too old for this. Give me another assignment.

 Sincerely,

Harley

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: RE: LOL NO

RECEIVED: August 17th, 3042

 Harley,

           I’m sorry, I need more explanation than this to take you off immediately. I handled a week. So can you. You can’t use your age as an excuse all the time.

 Qilar

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: RE: LOL NO

RECEIVED: August 17th, 3042

 Qilar,

           Fine: here it is.

           I only got the two Clients. Client Pines was, as they said, out on important business, who knows when he’ll be back. Something was fishy about that but okay, I won’t pry, and these two are setting me off on edge a little as is so maybe it’s just that.

           Then the more I interact with them, the more I realize that Client Farkas’s aura is just fucking weird. Bananapants, CocoNutPuffs, whatever you want to call it. It’s all muddled and patchy and a headache and a half to read. It’s like somebody took his aura, threw out most of it, and stuffed a bunch of excess aura in to fill the gaps. There’s no way he was born like that, and there’s no way whatever happened was pretty (or probably even painless). He’s definitely trying, though, so I figured aight, we’ll see if we can’t compromise with this whippersnapper.

           The problem is Client Lam.

           Client Lam doesn’t want to be pleased. Client Lam, for whatever reason, is terrified. And overprotective of Client Farkas. And she’s absolutely looking for reasons to be disappointed, or she’s at least seeing shadows where there are none. We could present Client Lam with a fortress and she wouldn’t be satisfied. My bet is that whatever happened to Farkas’s aura was traumatizing, and Lam was impacted by that trauma. I showed her two viable properties at excellent prices with wonderful locations and an astounding lack of extradimensional pockets or Magitech gadgets, and she found fault with them. Neither were crime scenes, thankfully.

           You may want to assign them with somebody who has experience—but you could also use this opportunity to show some junior realtors how tough clients can be. Also, the junior realtors might not be so entrenched in the practice, and they could have some excellent ideas.

           Or you could just…send these clients to somebody else. Your choice. I’m just not dealing with it. They’ll drive me into an early grave if I take this too seriously, and you know how I get.

 Sincerely,

Harley

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: Realtor Change Notification

RECEIVED: August 18th, 3042

 Dear Ms. Lam,

           Hello! What a pleasure it is to meet you. I’m writing to inform you that unfortunately, Mx. Ya-en is unable to continue handling your case. The upside is that I am able to do so in xir stead! My name is Amar Shirvani, and I’m going to be handling your case from now on. I’m excited to work with you and your partners, and hope that you are as excited to work with me! I promise I will do my best to help you achieve your housing dreams!

 Yours,

Amar Shirvani

Lindquist Realtors

 -

 AMAR SHIRVANI

Junior Realtor

[email protected]

Phone  Lindquist Realtors Homepage

Alternative Display Options

             Native to Norfolk, Amar Shirvani is the youngest member of Lindquist Realtors at 22 years old. He recently graduated from the Offet University of Business with honors. While not the most experienced, Amar brings exuberance and creative thinking to the team at Lindquist Realtors. He has been involved with volunteer work from early childhood due to his parents—

 -

 TweetyFlaps Trending

#clientwoes

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself

@Silverforks

So I’ve got a kind of sort of customer service job, right. And so far it’s been fine! I’ve had ok clients. And then Bossman slides me a paunchy one cross the table and I start to understand #clientwoes for the first awful real time. 1/ 10:48 AM        23 AUG 3042

______________________________________________________________________

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself                            

Replying to @Silverforks

2/ i know from the start its gonna be a Ride. Like, chalk and candles intensity. Client file is thicc w/rejected properties (im in housing). But I’m game!! Im always game, you know me haha. Unfortunately… 10:50 AM        23 AUG 3042

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself                            

Replying to @Silverforks

3/ these are clients from hell. I wouldn’t be surprised if they were actually demons in disguise. Here to torture me. For something. I aint actually ever summoned nothing. But like, it’s unreal how BAD this exp has been. 10:51 AM        23 AUG 3042

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself                            

Replying to @Silverforks

4/ for 1, they all look normal expt one of them. Head to toe, covered. Would think was vampire, but that’s usu specified in reports. Nobody’s seen his skin other than flashes. Aight, tho, I aint prejudiced, i’ll roll with it. 10:53 AM        23 AUG 3042

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself                            

Replying to @Silverforks

5/ so they super picky clients, right. I thought nah, they cant be that bad!! Just haven’t hooked the right worm yet. So I pick out a coupla worms (houses) that I think they might enjoy and hoo boy was that a chore, but im satisfied! Spoiler: they aint. 10:56 AM        23 AUG 3042

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself                            

Replying to @Silverforks

6/ they aint never gon be satisfied. #1, not-vampire client mentions v v quietly to me that sorry, theres a thing he cant deal with on premises, but mb they can still keep it in mind?? But (super good hearing???) another client hears and squawks about it. he aint having it, apparently.   10:58 AM        23 AUG 3042

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself                            

Replying to @Silverforks

7/ and then third client (Harpy) hears bc squawk, and she SUPER aint having it, so we just go to the next house. And the next one. And—u get it already.   10:59 AM        23 AUG 3042

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself                            

Replying to @Silverforks

8/ and like, im patient. Im pretty lowkey. But today’s house was—perfect?? There was nothing wrong with it. Client Hoodie didn’t say nothing bad. Liked the rooms. Client EllieEars don’t complain bout no weird curses or dead bodies or bad décor. But Client Harpy?? Client Harpy is impossible. 11:02 AM        23 AUG 3042

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself                            

Replying to @Silverforks

9/ u kno what she said?? She said, and I repeat: the front door is too thin.

The front door. Which is a solid 5 cm of wood (real!! Wood!!). is too thin. It’s “Insecure”. 11:03 AM        23 AUG 3042

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself                            

Replying to @Silverforks

10/11 I didn’t say it bc im a good worker, but I really wanted to go off on her. She’s impossible. This is the worst assignment ever. Ive worked so hard my soul’s gonna feel it 5 carnations down.   11:05 AM        23 AUG 3042

 world aint gonna end til I end it myself                            

Replying to @Silverforks

11/11 srsly. 5 cm of solid wood!! Insecure. Unbelievable. #clientwoes 11:05 AM        23 AUG 3042

 -

 August 23rd  

Bentley

Sally Mihn at work sent me this.

You might want to take a look.

https://tweetyflap.com/silverforks/status/1199679934986810752

 DipTipTyrone

oh boy

that’s about us alright

 Bentley

Yeah

It is

Torako

We need to have a fucking talk

 KoraTorako

We do need to have a talk with the realtors

That’s unacceptable

 Bentley

What we need to do with the realtors is apologize

What we three need to do is discuss what the fuck we’re doing

 KoraTorako

No, that was completely unprofessional

And what do you mean, what are we doing?? We’re looking for a house.

 DipTipTyrone

I’ll take care of the tweets for a pack of gummies

 Bentley

No, Dipper

Torako

We have been house-hunting for a month

We have looked at over 200 houses by this point

 KoraTorako

Thanks dip but probs not

 Bentley

And you have said no

To all

Of them

We need to fucking compromise

 KoraTorako

Compromise on what?? Our safety?? Our comfort?

 Bentley

No, on your unachievable standards

 DipTipTyrone

Oh

Oh no

 KoraTorako

Who says they unachievable??

 Bentley

The 200+ houses we’ve looked at to dismiss out of hand!

 DipTipTyrone

This is a fight, isn’t it

 KoraTorako

I’m just making sure that whatever we get will be safe!

 Bentley

Most of them HAVE been safe!

You’re just being STUPIDLY overprotective!

 DipTipTyrone

oh no im the

im the middle party aren’t i

 KoraTorako

I am not!

 Bentley

Yes you are! You need to trust me to make choices for myself!!

 KoraTorako

Well, I would if you weren’t so insistent on ignoring your own wellbeing!

 DipTipTyrone

How does one mediate

 Bentley

I’m just trying to find a fucking house! I’m trying to meet them in the middle!

 KoraTorako

Not on that you shouldn’t!

 Bentley

It’s MY choice!

 KoraTorako

And it’s MINE TOO!

You shouldn’t be in an environment that causes you to have so many fucking nightmares!

Like you are NOW

 DipTipTyrone

Uuuhhh shit shit shit um

You’re both right and both wrong?

 Bentley

Love you, but Shut up dip

And maybe I’m having nightmares because we’re still in this fucking apartment

 KoraTorako

I told you we could stay at another Rental until we found a house!

And shut up dip, im the right one here

 Bentley

You’re the right one???

We can’t solve everything with money, Torako!! And at the pace we’re going, we’d be in that rental place until our current lease is up Next January

 DipTipTyrone

…maybe this is an in-person convo?

 KoraTorako

I just want our house to be safe!! What if something happens again?

 Bentley

It won’t fucking happen again! Fantino was a one-off. I haven’t pissed off any other researchers overly invested in their research lately!

 DipTipTyrone

What about that one guy at work?

Wait no ignore that

 KoraTorako

But it MIGHT! We! Don’t! Know for sure!!

 Bentley

We don’t know that it WILL happen, Torako!

You need to just let this stupid fucking paranoia go

 DipTipTyrone

Uh

 KoraTorako

Stupid?? Fucking paranoia??

 DipTipTyrone

Bentley that was not uh

Not good

 KoraTorako

It’s not paranoia if it could happen again. It happened once.

I can’t forget that, Bentley. I can’t forget going to open that door and finding it unlocked. I can’t forget opening the apartment to you being gone, and to the wards being destroyed, and to everything I thought was keeping us safe not actually keeping us safe.

I’m not doing that, Ben.

The house we’re getting?? Is going to be fucking safe, and I am going to make it that way.

 DipTipTyrone

Torako…

 Bentley

Look, I get that

But there were ways of making the houses we looked at safe that you weren’t willing to entertain.

That one, with the green roof and the cute staircase?? That was totally viable. We absolutely could have torn the security system out with no trouble.

We literally have Dipper to do that for us.

But you said no! Like you said no to the one with the nice garden, and the one with the really big open windows.

I just want a house, Torako.

It’s not even like we’re necessarily going to live here forever? So if it’s not perfect, I’m ok. I just want somewhere to live that’s not the apartment.

 KoraTorako

And I just want us to be safe, Bentley.

I cant do this right now.

I have to go.

 DipTipTyrone

Is it over?

…fuck it isn’t, is it.

Fuck.

 -

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: Important

RECEIVED: August 23rd 3042

 Dear Mr. Lindquist,

           Hello. I’m writing to inform you that one of your employees—I’m assuming our current agent, Mr. Amar Shirvani—vented about my partners and I on a public forum. Here is the link: https://tweetyflap.com/silverforks/status/1199679934986810752

           While I understand that we have not been very accommodating clients—myself particularly—I don’t believe that this appropriate behavior. Venting is important, but the place where Mr. Shirvani chose to express his frustrations wasn’t the right one. Please convey this to him for me.

           I don’t want him to lose his job. He’s young and hasn’t learned this particular lesson yet. But I also find myself hesitant to keep working with Mr. Shirvani. Would you be willing to either transfer us to another realtor, or recommend us to another company like Mx. Pinkflax did? I would really appreciate it.

 Sincerely,

Torako Lam

Private Investigator

.

-

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: RE: Important

RECEIVED: August 24th 3042

 Dear Ms. Lam,

           I’m very sorry to hear about what Mr. Shirvani did. We’ve discussed the incident and he understands the impropriety of his actions. Thank you for bringing this to my attention.

           While I believe that we have exhausted our properties here at Lindquist Realtors, I am happy to recommend you to a few other businesses in the Norfolk Area. They’re smaller, but perhaps they have the specific kind of property that you are looking for. I will do my best to put in a good word for you. Should that fail, I will personally endeavor to find you the house you need.

 Sincerely,

Qilar Lindquist

Lindquist Realtors

 -

 August 24th

Chat with Reynash Pines

11:01 AM

Hey Reynash

Can I ask you a question?

11:02 AM

What a surprise to hear from you via text!

Usually you just pop in and scare my soul out of my chest.

But for your question-- please ask

There’s nothing to do at work at the moment.

11:02 AM

Wouldn’t you usually leave?

Or have things changed again without me realizing it?

11:03 AM

Oh no, normally I would

But I have an appointment at 11:45 that I have to stick around for.

What’s your question?

11:04 AM

Torako and Bentley are fighting over housing.

We’ve told you about the house-hunting, right?

11:04 AM

Oh dear. Yes, I know.

Why are they fighting?

11:05 AM

Trauma. I think. They didn’t say themselves.

But I think it’s trauma.

Anyways, that’s not the important part.

What’s important is how do I help them?

11:06 AM

From the incident back around May?

Oh dear.

Are you sure that’s not the important part?

11:06 AM

Mostly.

Anyway. I just need to know how to mediate.

I haven’t mediated in…

In forever?

I can’t remember.

11:07 AM

…why are you even asking me?

11:07 AM

Because not many people know me as me

And you’re one of the only people who has known me as me for a significant amount of time and are also NOT ben or tora

And also you’re pretty calm mostly except when I show up and scare you

11:09 AM

Well

In my defense, I think most people would be scared if you showed up out of thin air and yelled strange things like WHAT YOU CRAVIN or whatever.

11:10 AM

Are you…sassy?

11:10 AM

Possibly

Back to your predicament: mediating

Have Bentley and Torako been able to talk to each other in person about this?

11:11 AM

No :(

They’ve been very quiet around each other at home.

And Bentley’s going on a trip soon.

So they won’t have a chance for a while.

Do they have to??

11:12 AM

It’s just easier to mediate when you’re all there.

Basically

They have to have the conversation, right?

Your job as mediator is to make sure they stay on task

And that no thoughtlessly cruel words are said.

11:12 AM

So they can say mean things

But they can’t mean the mean things?

11:13 AM

Okay, let me rephrase:

They’re mad at each other. They might say mean things that just hurt each other. Words that are meant to hurt each other.

They should not do that.

That does not help the conversation.

11:13 AM

Oh

Hm

So if one says the other is being stupidly paranoid

That’s where I say no, stop?

11:13 AM

Right.

11:14 AM

And if the other says one is being needlessly reckless with his own mental health

That’s where I say no, stop?

11:14 AM

Er

Maybe not, depending

Is he being needlessly reckless with his own mental health?

11:14 AM

I don’t know? Maybe? How do I tell?

11:15 AM

I can’t believe I’m saying this but

We might need to have this conversation face to face.

Please come he0-awekjhwel

11:39 AM

And remember what we discussed

And the pamphlets I sent you

And also please remind Torako and Bentley that Lata would like to see them sometime next month if they’re able to.

11:39 AM

Thanks Ray!

I really appreciate everything

Sorry for making you scream!

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: RE: Professional Request

RECEIVED: August 25th, 3042

 Dear Qilar Lindquist

           Thank you very much for the request. I’m honored that you would consider sending us clients that you yourself could not satisfy. It honestly instills an incredible, renewed sense of capability in us here at Khoohoo Realtors.

           Upon viewing the file you sent, however, one of my junior realtors raised concerns that these particular clients may be too difficult for a firm of our moderate size to adequately deal with. Between yourselves and HomeStar Realtors, these three clients weren’t satisfied. That, to us, is a bit of a red flag. We reviewed their specifications in comparison to our own catalogue, but don’t believe we have anything that they would be interested in actually buying. Therefore, in the interest of saving everybody a great deal of time and energy, I must admit that we cannot at this time take on your clients.

 Have an excellent day,

Simon Khoo

Head of Khoohoo Realtors

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: RE: Professional Request

RECEIVED: August 25th, 3042

 Dear Qilar Lindquist

             Thank you very much for this request.

           Unfortunately, we don’t have the time or patience for clients that would require a great deal of energy. From the looks of the file you attached, that seems to be the case with these clients. Therefore, in short, no.

 Yours,

Lance Fraiser

Senior Realtor

DreamHome Realtors

 -

 To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Attachment: 2042-PoliceRecoverKidnappedManwithHelpFromCivillian.qbf

SUBJECT: RE: Professional Request

RECEIVED: August 27th, 3042

 Qilar,

           Long time no talk, friend!! Wow it’s been a while, I guess we’ve both been busy. I know this is a professional request and all, but we should get drinks or something!! I hear there’s a great alfree bar that’s just opened up downtown. Apparently it has killer drinks, and it of course it doesn’t have alcoholic stuff so you’re good to drink whatever.

           I took a look at the client rec you sent me, and hoo boy they’ve sure got a record! RedFin usually takes whatever, and you know that, but I don’t actually think we can get them anything?? I’d feel bad chucking properties at them that I know they won’t like. I think they’ve already checked out like three quarters of Norfolk lol. Talk about trying to summon with a broom and a lighter!

           Also, they really remind me of this one tweety I read recently? Oof, if that was one of your kiddos who posted it, you should really tell them that’s a bad call—both for them and the clients. These clients aren’t going to get anything in Norfolk, not with that popular tweety paired with that record. And if it gets out that your kiddo was the one that posted that??? Aint nobody gonna hire them, not with all this client confidentiality and all at stake. Gotta be careful what you post online, even when it is venting.

           Yo, but hey, hope you find somebody for these clients! They seem like they got some scary baggage. The one who nopes around magitec and exdims reminds me of something I read in the news a while ago—it was an article that was hushed down p quickly out of respect for the victim, but I still got the doc. I’ve attached it if you want to read! It might even help you figure stuff out with your clients, even if they aren’t the same.

 Let’s meet up for drinks sometime!

Naita Fellen

Owner of RedFin Realtors, Norfolk

Senior Realtor

 -

 August 27th

KoraTorako

I just received an email from Qilar that he’s going to continue to handle our case, but that it may take a while to comb through what properties they have left.

I said it was fine because Bentley’s off on a trip.

 DipTipTyrone

Great!!

This seems like a good time to have a heart to heart, don’t you think?

 KoraTorako

I, uh, what?

 DipTipTyrone

Bentley’s doing nothing right now! Bentley, talk

Bentley, talk or I’ll make you talk.

Bentley I know you’re at your hotel.

 Bentley

Oh my stars dip

What??

 DipTipTyrone

You guys argued a lot last time we really had a discussion

And you’re angry

And you need to talk about why you’re angry

So that you have a healthy conclusion to your argument

And so that you understand each other’s viewpoints better.

It’s important!

 KoraTorako

But why…now?

 DipTipTyrone

Because you sent that message

And I’m sure Bentley’s feeling vicious about it

 Bentley

No I’m not!

 DipTipTyrone

Yes you are

I can see your aura, and while it’s difficult to read, you’re very dlskajlkwjelkjewnsd;nlab

Aslkdjgwaelkl;kwa;ljk

Dlkjaw-000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

 KoraTorako

What the fuck

 DipTipTyrone

You can’t take my phone away from me!! Ha! I win!

 Bentley

You can’t just half slide through the wall so that I can’t tell you’ve blipped in!

What the hell??

 KoraTorako

Okay okay so youre serious about this

Fine

What do you want us to talk about

 DipTipTyrone

Your feelings, I guess?

Like, Bentley. Tell us how you feel about Torako’s latest message.

 Bentley

You’re not my therapist

 DipTipTyrone

No, but we’re family

Which means communication

So tell us.

 Bentley

Uuuuuggghhh

Fine

Torako, that email proves why it was stupid to just dismiss all the properties as soon as we saw them and I feel vindicated but also tired

 DipTipTyrone

Hey, um, you gotta cut all the negativity against the other person out of your message

Try again!

 Bentley

…

The email proves that it was wrong to dismiss the properties without really thinking further about them. I feel vindicated. I feel tired.

Happy?

 DipTipTyrone

Better!

Torako, your turn!

 KoraTorako

Oh my stars are we really doing this

This is so stupid

 DipTipTyrone

Do it

 Bentley

Yeah tora, do it

If I have to, so do you

 KoraTorako

Fine

I’m just tired, ok?? This has taken so much longer than I thought it would. And I know I’m at fault for some of it!!

But I’m sick of Bentley falling to the pressure of ‘picking’ because it’s what’s expected of us. I don’t want him to feel scared or uncertain or uncomfortable in whatever house we pick, even if we’re only there for a couple years until we can pay off the place.

 DipTipTyrone

Thank you Torako! I don’t see any unnecessarily hostile language in there, so that’s A-OK, you pass. Bentley?

 Bentley

I just feel bad because everybody’s trying so hard

And we’re being so hard on them

And sometimes I just don’t understand why you reject the houses? So what that the security system isn’t perfect. I don’t mind going to the effort of pulling it out and starting it again. Heck, I would pay Dip to do it easy!

 KoraTorako

But that’s not your problem

That’s a me problem

I just…I want it to be good from the beginning. I want it to work from the start so that we don’t have to worry about it.

 Bentley

But that’s not going to happen

Sometimes you have to work to make something work for you

And if we gotta do that

I’m fine with it

 KoraTorako

I…I guess

I’m still not completely comfortable with that

 Bentley

We can work on it together

And hey

If I promise to not say yes to houses that make me uncomfortable will you promise to give things like security systems and house integrity a chance?

Like, not dismiss them immediately?

 KoraTorako

…yeah. I can do that, I think.

 DipTipTyrone

Good!! I’m glad we had this discussion

You know, I’m a pretty great mediator!

 Bentley

Dipper I watched you leaf through those pamphlets during the discussion

But yeah

Thank you, dipper

 KoraTorako

Thank you, dipper <3

 Bentley

He’s blushing!!

Compliment him more

 DipTipTyrone

No!

Stop ganging up on me!

 KoraTorako

You’re so cute, Dips!!

 Bentley

The cutest

Aw, he’s glowing

 DipTipTyrone

I should have let you keep fighting

 -

 August 29th, 3042

Chat with Saint Akuapem

4:12 PM

Torako, how are you?

Hepsa says hello

Are you still looking for houses?

4:15 PM

Yeah, we are

Say hello back for me

I’m ok, but a bit tired.

4:15 PM

Excellent

A parent of one of Hepsa’s students mentioned that their mother passed away recently

And that they were willing to sell the property

It seems the mother was afflicted with a curse that prevented her from using most Magitech

And she didn’t trust extra-dimensional spaces

It was a family home, so there are 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, a nice garden.

Would you be interested in looking at it?

4:17 PM

Are you fucking serious.

Yes please, a thousand times yes

When can we look?

4:18 PM

Let me ask Hepsa to ask for me.

4:49 PM

Would you be available tomorrow afternoon?

3:30 PM.

 4:51 PM

Oh gosh oh yes

What’s the address?

4:51 PM

Just meet me at our apartment.

We will walk you over.

4:51 PM

Officer you really are a saint

I could kiss you

4:52 PM

Bring some more of those brownies. It’ll be even then.

 -

 “So? What do you think?”

           Torako trailed her fingers across the mantle for the fireplace. It was a real one; apparently, pure electric fireplaces were hell to install and more hell to maintain. There were no runes carved into the rough brick, no faint thrum of magic that Torako could now pick up if she closed her eyes and concentrated really, really hard.

           The whole house had very little by the way of magic.

           “It’s…” Torako looked down at the fireplace proper. It had been cleaned, recently, shiny in the way that old things gleam when properly taken care of. The house had been loved, she was sure of it. “It’s not bad.”

           A touch to her elbow. She looked over at Bentley, whose eyebrows were quirked. “Torako. Please. Be honest.”

           She hummed, turned to lean against the mantle and look out the big windows that provided a view of the garden space. Unmaintained, a little wild. They could put a vegetable patch there, she thought. Maybe a couple fruit trees.

           “I’m not a fan of the front porch steps,” she said, “or the ramp. It’s a bit rickety.”

           “We can fix it up,” Bentley said. He paused, tilted his head, then gave her a sly little grin. “Or at least, we know somebody who works cheap for that kind of thing.”

           “Hey, you can’t let me hear that,” Dipper said from the other room, where he was laying flat on the ground with his ear to the floorboards. “My prices might go up.”

           “Is it all good over there?” Bentley asked in lieu of answering. Torako looked up at the ceiling, where runes or wards or protective magics would be. Magics that would be hers, so they would hurt less to Bentley’s sensitive eye.

           “No creepy basements filled with cadavers or slaughtered cultmembers, if that’s what you’re asking,” Dipper said. Thankfully, Illya had left them to look over her dead mother’s home one last time, so there were no surprised gasps or queer glances. “Though we may want a couple rugs. I think this floor gets cold in the wintertime.”

           “Windowpanes are a little thin,” she muttered to herself. Her fingers tapped against her leg. “Could stand to be a bit more reinforced—though the French doors are probably okay, they seem sturdy enough—”

           “Torako.”

           Bentley’s warm hand slid over the one on her leg. Torako looked at him again. He peered at her over the rims of his oversized sunglasses, golden eye shimmering just a little. “Is there anything seriously wrong with this place? Anything that can’t be fixed?”

           Torako pressed her lips together. The aching anxiety in her chest pressed against her sternum. She tried to ignore it, and the thoughts of shadowy figures cutting through the glass panes, burning through the front door, squeezing through the cracks in the floorboards to steal Bentley away from—

           “Hey,” Bentley said, soft.

           “Hey,” Dipper said, a little brighter and brasher. He took her hand in his human hand. “We’re here, okay?”

           Torako turned her head to Dipper, brown eyes crinkled at the edges (and when had he put wrinkles on?) and grin still just a little too wide for human mouths to stand. She took a deep breath, and exhaled.

           “No,” she said. Bentley inhaled, sharp. “No, not no no! I just meant, ugh, there’s nothing I don’t like about this house that can’t be fixed. That no. Not the ‘let’s not do this’ no.”

           Both of her boys relaxed on either side of her. “Yeah,” Bentley said. “Yeah, I thought this was a good one, too.”

           She twisted her hand in theirs so that she could hold them.

           “Plus, it’s like, dirt cheap,” Dipper said. “Who knew that buying a house without a Realtor handling fee would result in such a bargain?”

           “Okay,” Torako said, a grin starting to pull at the corners of her mouth. The sunlight from the window was warm against her feet, reaching up to soothe the phantom pains in her shins from all those months ago. “Let’s tell Ilya.”

           It would be a good home.

 -

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

SUBJECT: FWD: Thank you for your help

RECEIVED: August 31st, 3042

I don’t know whether to be furious or relieved. Mostly I’m just tired.

You up for dinner tonight?

Qilar

 >>To: [email protected]

>>From: [email protected]

>>Attached: NewHouse+US.png

>>SUBJECT: Thank you for your help

>>RECEIVED: August 31st, 3042

>> 

>>Dear Mr. Lindquist,

           >> I email you to thank you so much for all your assistance. I don’t think we would have gotten as far as we did without you. Due to this journey, my partners and I realized some very important things.

           >>As you might have realized based on the name of the attachment, my partners and I have found a house through one of our acquaintances! It was lovely and off-market, and I probably wouldn’t have said no if it weren’t for our experiences with everybody at Lindquist Realtors and HomeStar Realtors. Thank you so much for your time and effort and energy, and I hope that you have a chance to relax now that we’re out of your hair.

>> 

>>Thank you again,

>>Torako Lam

>>Private Investigator

 -

 From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

 Qilar,

           What the fuck, even. Truly. What the fuck.

           I’ll bring the sparkling apple cider.

Olive

#transcendence au #tau fic #my fic #bentley #dipper #torako

[patriciahaefeli]

A Cautionary Tale? A Love Story? You Decide

It's been one of those rollercoaster weeks, one that began with a great deal of pain, which I tried to ignore at first, so as not to ruin my 17- year old’s already Corona-compromised birthday party. At some point during our 5 p.m. family Zoom celebration, I quietly left the room and went upstairs to lie down, writhe in pain, get back up, bend over, moan, repeat. This continued through the night Monday – and at one point, I remember thinking that labor wasn’t this bad and that I should probably go to the emergency room. In this new world we’re in, that thought was quickly dismissed by one word: COVID. I paced the floor at 3 a.m., alternately moaning and then bopping my head and sort of softly singing what kept running through my head, which was the chorus of The Knack’s 1979 hit song, “My Sharona.” Only my version went “My Corona.” Yes, even while suffering, I’m clever that way. 

By Tuesday morning the pain had subsided. I was exhausted however, and slept throughout the day. “Tricia! Drink this! Jesus, she’s burning up.” It was the alarm in my husband’s voice that I responded to more than the command. I sat up, drank the water he was holding out to me, and when I caught my reflection in the mirror over the dresser I had the brief, feverously detached impression of someone who’d sat under a sun lamp for too long. Sun lamp, the words made me almost giggle out loud. Sun-lamp, sun-lamp, sun-lamp…Does anyone even know what that is anymore? A few hours later I had a virtual appointment with my regular GP, during which the decision was made for me to go to the office first thing Wednesday for a full exam. My instructions (my fever-addled brain again added the words “should I choose to accept them” - hehehe), for entering the building would come in the form a text. 

My office exam was efficient and thorough. Upon arrival, I called the office and someone met me at a side door. As we were both masked and gloved, we nodded and murmured muffled greetings. Two PAs and an MD palpated my tender abdomen while I stifled screams. They decided that I should have a C-T scan that day, with the expectation that the offending culprit was a kidney stone. As many radiology facilities are currently closed, it took a few hours for them to locate one that would take me. My scan took place at 4:30. I was the last patient of their day. 

 Fast forward to 6:30 p.m. Wednesday evening. I picked up the call, which was remarkable in itself because anyone who knows me knows how irritating it is that, a) my phone is always on silent mode, and, b) I rarely answer numbers I don’t recognize. It was another doctor from Vanguard, calling to let me know that my C-T scan showed no evidence of kidney stones – “Yay!” BUT, he cut in, it did show acute appendicitis. What I needed to do, he said, was to go directly to the nearest ER. 

So here’s where this story really begins, because I was about to get a reality check regarding the difference between the inconveniences of “social distancing” and quite literally, matters of life and death. For those of us who are shuffling around at home in our sweatpants, eating too much, complaining about the buffoonery of our President, laughing at all the funny memes, and who are, to one degree or another, COMPLETELY OBLIVIOUS to the fact that health care workers do not have the luxury of ANY of that, here’s the newsflash: The Corona virus has virtually SHUT down normal operations for hospitals and surgical facilities, so if you’re also laughing in the face of social-distancing guidelines, and just can’t wrap your head around the possibility of contracting this deadly disease, know this too: If you break your arm, or your spouse has a heart attack, or your child’s strange rash won’t go away and you’re just really concerned, good luck. We are NOT in Kansas anymore, peeps. 

 I considered doing a bit of a negative a rant on the first hospital that I went to here, but perhaps that wouldn’t be fair. “The nearest ER” for me would have been another hospital, but due to their somewhat dubious reputation, we opted to go just a bit farther away. The best thing I can say about that experience was that the safety protocols to enter the ER were impressive. Picture the scene in E.T. where the Hazmat-suited guys from the space program find out about him and “invade” the house in a tunnel of white - then picture the people standing six feet apart outside of say, ShopRite, only these people don’t look so great. They’re kind of bent over, or swaying, or leaning on someone else. Then count your blessings that your gut hurts and you’re not bleeding out…or struggling to breathe. 

Three hours later, after they’d reviewed my scans and completed all of the necessary pre-op tests (blood work, EKG, urine analysis), I got the word that most of the ORs were being used as ICUs for COVID patients, and they were only doing “emergent” surgeries. They sent me home with massive doses of antibiotics, and a referral to see their staff general surgeon - outpatient. 

I figured they were right, too. Must not be very serious. I was doing well with that notion until the following morning, when I heard the barely concealed shock in the voice of my regular MD.  

“Did they see your scans?” his tone serving only to increase my anxiety. 

 “Yeah. But my appendix hasn’t exploded yet.” I said. 

 “Ah,” he sighed, “I know things are being handled differently in the ‘current environment,’ but last time I checked, acute appendicitis was emergent.” 

Okay, pay attention now, because here’s where it gets really interesting: See if you can answer his parting questions: 

 “Do you have a general surgeon? Preferably one with their own facility?” 

 So, do you? And if you do, are you sure they’re even open right now? I sure as hell didn’t (and the name they gave me at the hospital turned out to be for a doctor whose answering machine told me he was not seeing new patients). And the idea that it was now pretty much my problem to solve was a little intimidating – especially for someone who generally needs to be told that they’re sick (enough) or in (enough) pain to seek help—but that’s another story. Now that doctor, who I respect and like a lot, said he’d be trying to find me one, but that I should do my research as well. 

 My husband and I made a fairly long list of people/places to call, and split it. Those we were able to reach at all offered possible solutions to my dilemma, but each dead-ended pretty quickly. I focused on the task now, trying to ignore what it might mean that the ache in my belly seemed to be spreading down my right leg. 

As of this writing, I have yet to hear back from my regular GP and yet, here I sit, post-op, able to get this down mostly because of a Facebook message I sent to one of the nurses in the Belleville Public School district. The only real help I got came from her, a nurse, who responded immediately to an “in-boxed” message, and kept responding for the next hour, sending me the names and phone numbers of doctors (sometimes with their credentials!), links to possible facilities, and words of encouragement. She gave me her personal cell phone number and encouraged me to call it if I had questions and/or to let her know how it was going. I felt like she meant it, too. I also think she was responsible for the first in a series of serendipitous events that just may have saved my life. One of the names she gave me turned out to be the dad of one of my kid’s friends. 

 At that point, things happened pretty quickly. I called him (at home) and told him my situation. In a matter of 20 minutes, he had my scans and had booked  a time slot for me for same-day surgery at Clara Maass. He’s a high-energy, outgoing kind of guy, and although I’d stood on sidelines with him and his lovely wife at many a sports event, I don’t know him well enough, nor did I think it was appropriate to laugh out loud when he laid out the plan: “With everything going on, I just really want to do you – and get you the hell out of there!” 

So here I am, more grateful to him than I can possibly express and having some time to consider just how random and crazy and dangerous that whole situation was (turns out, my appendix had begun to perforate after all, and the real fun was just beginning) and how fortunate I am. 

 But the real heroes here - Oh, and God, aren’t we all a little sick of the “hero” thing? – well get over it, and listen up! From the minute I walked through the door of Clara Maass yesterday, my experience was the best it could possibly have been. The nurses! OMG the nurses - I was in pre-op for hours. Lucky as I was to have been squeezed in to an already crowded surgical schedule, the truth of the matter was that my presence had required a quick shifting of resources—stretchers and space and - nurses. My sudden appearance in the queue was inconvenient, possibly even annoying. And yet all of them, including the nurse who ran the OR, came by to check on me, to give me extra blankets, to chat with me, and laugh with me. A friend’s daughter-in-law, who is a nurse there, got a text from him and even she came from three floors below just to say hello and charm me with her Australian accent and tired-but-twinkling blue eyes. I swear, for me? The whole experience was a cross between a weirdly sterile spa stay, and – as mine all happened to be women - a girls’ sleepover with your best girlfriends—only these were women I'd just met (but they’d also pretty much seen me naked, so, there’s that…). 

Most of them were nearing the end of a 12-hour shift. As I lay there, relaxed and warm, reading and texting, they race-walked back and forth among those of us who waited, or were recovering. I lost count of how many times one of them asked me if I was okay, or if I needed something. They ate their dinners on the move, taking bites and then sprinting off, tearing off one set of gloves, putting on another. These people Do. Not. Sit. The sink was right near my bed, so I saw a lot of hand-washing traffic too, and a lot of red, chapped, over-sanitized hands. They spoke in soothing voices to those who were waiting, and possibly scared, and loud-enough voices for those emerging from the cloud of anesthesia to understand. Sometimes they shouted good-natured complaints to one another, or teased one another – and me, as when one started repacking those bags they give you for your clothes, amusement in her voice as she yelled, “What the hell did you do here, shove it all in like a little kid? Your purse is open – Maria, come over here and see this – she’s a mess!” Hahahaha! One came by and pointed to the cover of the book I was reading entitled “The Silent Patient”, and joked “That’s the kind we like!” 

I even began to wonder if what I was getting was “special treatment” reserved for those whose surgeries were personally called-in by the surgeon. Once he arrived, however, it was clear that not only did they not know he was the one who got me in, but they chided him in the same affectionate way. At a point, I said to one of them, “Doctors think they’re all that, but nurses really run the show don’t they?” She winked at me and elbowed me a little, “Like husbands, honey – they just think they’re in charge!” 

I lounged, for over four hours while they stood on what had to be tired feet, hands on hips as they talked to me, telling me which part of the hospital they’d spent the morning in, or where they were headed next in this crazy, all-hands-on-deck environment. We chatted about jobs and kids, and only when the topic of this deadly disease came up did the lack of words become conspicuous. Then it was all a mime of sad shakes of the head and downward glances. 

It occurs to me today that after all of this, I'm not sure I would recognize any of them tomorrow if I saw them on street – nor they me. Of course, we were all masked. But maybe I would – if I could see their eyes again. And I'm not exaggerating when I say that most of all, those eyes conveyed a profound kindness. And laughter, and concern, and compassion, and dedication—and a toughness that allows them to do it all. 

I'll tell you a secret: I am a person who often has a weird response to unexpected kindness - it makes me cry. I welled up more than once yesterday afternoon. I may have been just one of many for them – this is just what they do - but for me, a bond was made. I will always remember them. 

Make no mistake: it’s no hardship to be home in your sweatpants with your gel manicure looking a little ratchet, and your spouse and kids seeming more like houseguests who have overstayed their welcome. Today, I want you to feel really, really blessed and grateful, and if you’re like me, a generally healthy person who never really gave too much thought to the job that these people do, I hope I was able to convey just a little of it. 

That school nurse who rescued me put it this way: “I took an oath when I graduated just as physicians do. I have followed it for 28 years and it has never let me or my patients down.” That whole oath thing is good and important and all, but the heart behind it gives it grace. 

So, if you get an invitation to do one of those car processions where you beep your horn and cheer for the local health care workers as they go in to, or leave, work– get in your car and go. Or, just mail them each a check for a million dollars. Either way.

[crazyperfectsense]

4/30/20/1

god April was 5 minutes long and I’m going to spend all 5 of them writing this post

this is honestly probably far too personal to put into the public of the internet, and perhaps I’ll take it down before anyone really sees it, but Tumblr is comforting because it is almost a graveyard and the people who remain (who I see in fleeting posts in passing, hi) I trust (or just will not see this because they do not care or the algorithm does not favor long text posts), whereas Facebook is horrifying and Instagram is worse, and this is likely going to be too long to hold anyone’s attention for the whole thing, but I also want to get some notes down for whenever I finally get to talk to my therapist again, so here we go

I woke up at 6:30am naturally (horrifying!), leapt out of bed because I realized how much work I had to do (hate when a nap turns into just...sleep!), and got a text from my dad 15 minutes later that my maternal grandfather was in critical condition, and somehow still managed to do work for the next six hours out of necessity

it briefly brought back flashbacks to 2012, where my dad didn’t tell me for a week that his father died because I had finals my first semester of college, but told me right after he picked me up as we were driving across campus to pick up a friend that we were taking back home, so I had about 3 minutes to compose myself before a 2 hour car ride (horrifying!)

my grandfather died around 1pm, and I had the truly unique (horrifying! ! ! !) experience of finding out via text while I was on a Zoom call as the TA, where I was the only person sharing video other than the professor (my advisor!), and I had to keep my composure while simultaneously finishing creating the homework that I was behind on making while also trying to figure out what to respond to this text notification of mortality, because I don’t know how to say any sort of condolence really in Chinese, but my dad was handling communications and just texting in English anyway — and I don’t know, it’s the kind of thing where I probably could’ve ditched the call and made excuses later, but the effort to preserve even the slightest tinge of normalcy in this moment seemed right, and I did my very best (and succeeded!) to not spontaneously burst into tears on camera, even though I did about 0.03 seconds after I hung up

an aside: thank god that my advisor was sharing screen and people were hopefully focused on him / in speaker mode or something, because my neutral face is....poor! not entirely sure because I avoided making eye contact with my virtual self aside from brief checks to make sure that I was still alive, still functioning as I flickered from screen to screen across my two monitors

I had a meeting scheduled with my advisor afterwards, and he was all ready to move into it, but was so extremely understanding the second he saw my message I had sent 50 min earlier that was effectively “can we push this back a bit because my grandfather died and I need to call my fam lol” and suggested (as any normal person with emotions would) that I take the time to formally postpone and regroup if needed (needed!) rather than just pushing back a half hour or so like I naively thought would work

I had to desperately cry for about 20 minutes (horrifying!) before I felt ready to call my family, even so 

I hate hearing my mom sad! it’s the fucking worst! but it was a relief for 2 seconds to exist over a phone line with someone who also couldn’t talk straight without needing to take a few gasping breaths

another aside: i didn’t write about this in February because, well, everything was on fire in my life already, so briefly: my mom was supposed to be in China through mid-March, having gone there in October. things obviously went to shit, given *gestures at COVID-19 and the world*, and we booked her an early return flight, given that the senior living facility my grandparents were in had already closed to visitors out of precaution. my brother, dad, and I collectively freaked the fuck out (my brother started crying in the middle of class and had to leave, I barely held it together in mine but paid negative attention) when flights back from China started getting cancelled (and for those like, terrifying few hours where Trump was going to ban foreign nationals since my mom’s not a citizen and they didn’t make it clear that immediate family of US citizens were fine), but we somehow made it happen

so, back to the phone call: I just let her talk and she had so many regrets about leaving China when she did, and it just made me feel like the shittiest person for wanting her back home in America when it deprived her of the chance to see her dad one more time. my uncle and mom luckily got to take my grandparents out of the senior home for one night to celebrate Chinese New Year the day before the facility closed to visitors, so they had one last dinner together as a family but thinking about the what ifs makes me want to cry all over again. my mom just kept saying how she wished she could’ve done more, how she wished they had gone to the hospital earlier for a check-up, and the most I could helplessly contribute was “coronavirus concerns were already rampant and it could have been even worse, given airborne contagion,” even if I said as many other things as I could, about how dialysis was painful as hell and my grandfather, the former doctor, said he didn’t even want to be in the ICU at the end years before his passing

I learned what the Chinese words were for “depression” today, when my mom said my grandfather said he had it and they had gotten him some medication for it a few months ago, and I was so stunned that it was “depression” and not some strange disease I was unfamiliar with that I couldn’t say anything for 30 seconds, and I can’t really write more on this point because I will just start crying, but perhaps I should really think about how aging research is largely focused on non-Asian populations and how perhaps, I’m uniquely equipped to contribute a bit to the field here (but, that is true for so many things, and I am tired!)

my grandfather was great. he was quiet, but stubborn as hell. he was a doctor, and he loved routine. he cared so, fucking, much about me and my brother. he always insisted on taking my brother and me on walks to the same few places that he liked to visit — I remember visiting this community center that had a ping pong table — and him going out of his way to find me internet access, since my grandparents’ apartment didn’t have it for most of the years I visited. he loved taking me and my brother to KFC, because he thought it was the height of Americanized cuisine in China, and was so proud of how much better it was than American KFC (which he hadn’t had, but he knew, and he was right. we would eat every single bite of a two-piece meal each. even the ketchup was better). he once cut out a newspaper clipping ranking UT as the #2 college on this huge list of colleges (I think it was referring to research endowments, but anyway) and saved it to show me almost a year later. he told me in 2013 that he would probably live to see me finish college, and he lived to see me two years into grad school, dying when I was halfway through year three. he was 89. I loved him so much, even if we didn’t get to talk much at all.

I’m so mad at all these fucking people who, in the land of the free and the home of the so-called brave, are being idiots in this time and not social distancing. I’m so mad at every single friend who posts a large or small gathering to their story, at everyone who is so thirsty for social connection that they’re willing to put everyone they’re in close contact with at risk to hang out with another person for just a few hours (horrifying!). humans are social creatures who need engagement and connection to live — having written 22 pages about health and social relationships across 12 hours a few weeks ago, I understand this point so saliently that it’s painful. but seeing such....levity when my mom is crying over not being able to even go back to China to properly say goodbye because they won’t admit anyone from the US (and the US has banned travel to China, like that was necessary in this xenophobic environment) makes me want to punch a wall. suck it up! call your friends over Zoom or FaceTime like the goddamn rest of us!

grief is so strange, and grief is encapsulated in every molecule of this new normal — the strangeness of missing the life that once was, even if the past wasn’t something that I thought I’d miss. I remember feeling so, so guilty for traveling twice in February because of the studying for comps that I should’ve been doing, and now I marvel at my foresight. (and have so many regrets for the people who I told “I’ll see you in April when I’m back after comps are done!!”

I’m in this weird spot where I feel like I’m screaming at the people around me to care, and all of them are too busy with different social ties, and I’m watching my connections wilt and fray because everyone thinks I’m so stable and put-together (or boring and shy?)

an example: I was left off of a reunion Zoom call with some people I worked with in college that was widely talked about on social media regarding “love having shared all this time with these strong women” and all, and it felt very, idk, selfish and whiny (horrifying) to be like “how can you call this feminism when I, a real woman, am being left out of this call”! the following exchange, about the above, happened with in a group chat with a very blunt friend:

D: “Also, how does it feel to be left out of that [organization] Women zoom call, Amy?” another aside: (this....was a stupid question. but we’ll allow it, because boys will be boys.) me: “lol it honestly hurt my feelings but it's not like they weren't cliquey from the very beginning ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ to be expected I suppose” D: “Yeah when I saw that I was like “Why didn’t include Amy, she was there at the same time as they were”” me: “LOL thanks for thinking of me 🥺 they clearly did not”

(the other friend staying quiet, because it was tangibly awkward, even if I tried to play it chill, but my feelings remain hurt) perhaps if I cared more, or wanted to try and make people feel bad, I would’ve replied to a story with “tfti”, or laughed, or heart-reacted, or something “casual” that still implicates “where was my invite”, but....is it even worth investing the hurt and care and time when I’m not even sure it would spark embarrassment on their end? because perhaps they intentionally just do not...care about me and my feelings? at all? (horrifying?)

(I already know this to be true, even if the snub was unintentional, but I needed to muse about it anyway)

another aside: I still talk with plenty of people from this organization who I am MUCH closer with, and I shouldn’t feel snubbed to be snubbed by people who I never felt too close with in the first place! (and yet! horrifying!)

sent an extremely passive aggressive message earlier and yet, K tells me that the people in the chat might not even read it as passive aggressive! (horrifying!)

god. I don’t know! I feel so much sadness and anger, and yet still have a few hours of work to do tonight. it’s wild that even today, where my heart just hurts every few seconds if I think too hard, I still have my mind centered in needing to be productive and not lazy because I’ve already spent too much time procrastinating on my work (horrifying!). but the work is about Asian American collective action / media production, and I feel good about it, and I’m working with some badass Asian women, and I really hope it lands in this flagship journal, because that would be a win, and I kind of just need one! 

oh if it’s not clear I finished comps and I don’t know if I passed yet but they’re done so...that’s something

also whoever fucking looked at Chicago style citations and thought “oh hmm, let’s make another type of Chicago style that is DIFFERENT and call it Chicago style documentation” is the literal fucking devil

ok this is enough for now bye. god this was long. (horrifying!!!!!!)

#ever spontaneously write 2000+ words

[papitocarlositothirst]

HAHAHAHA LEWIS TUESDAY IS GONNA FUCKING DECK ME ANYWAY HERE’S ANOTHER ONE

It’s funny to think that something so simple as a text message could change the course of your young, mundane life so easily, so significantly. A Pandora’s text box, if you will.

I don’t know exactly what compelled me to send that particular text message on the night in question. And to this day, I still have not been able to figure out if it was the best or worst decision I could have made in that moment.

Let’s set the scene: I had just finished a long shift at the restaurant. My feet were throbbing and were positively rank from being wedged in my dilapidating black flats all day long. I tossed my bag onto my bed and clumsily wiggled out of my little black work dress.

The great debate - Do I take a shower now? Or skip straight ahead to the pass-out stage and let personal hygiene be a tomorrow’s problem?

Deciding that I didn’t even want to make that decision yet, I lay back on my bed in my underwear and began to scroll through the infinite nothingness to which my little smart phone was the portal. My eyes blurred over, not focusing on anything in particular while my thumbs danced familiar lines through its regular evening routine.

It wasn’t long before I gave up and locked the screen, extinguishing the light burning into my tired retina. I closed my eyes for a moment and felt my phone rise and fall on my chest as I took a few deep breaths in and out.

Suddenly, as if a ghost of inspiration had swept right through me and taken temporary possession of my body, I sat up once again, revived the sleeping screen in my palm, and swiped through the sea of contacts.

One of the names stood out among the rest. LEWIS. Without giving it much thought, I typed up a simple message.

> If you were serious about getting together for drinks sometime, you should let me know.

Send.

Not anticipating anything to actually come of this little virtual game, I got up with the intention of going to the bathroom. However, before I could even reach the threshold of the hallway, I heard a soft buzz come from somewhere in the air behind.

Unexpectedly, my pulse had elevated. I picked up my phone and saw his name there, just waiting for me to reach out and touch it.

• This is me letting you know.✓

My stomach did a little somersault. It was in that moment that I realized that perhaps I liked him a little more than I had initially allowed myself to appreciate.

• When were you thinking?

His response came immediately.

• How about tonight. 9:30?✓

Now, that made me nervous. I hadn’t anticipated a response, never mind immediate plans to be made. It’s too late now though. Go big or go home, right?

•That should work. Have a place in mind?

Confession: Indecision is one of my major weaknesses. Whenever possible, I will pass the responsibility of making a choice to the other player.

•I know a place. I’ll pick you up. Address?✓

No nonsense, straight to the point, and a free ride. Perfect. With my final response sent, I put the phone down once again and looked around the room, as if waiting for someone to give me to the go ahead to get ready for this impromptu outing. “Fuck,” I said out loud. “Well, I guess I should shower now.”

As the minutes counted down, I found myself pacing around my room. I checked my phone. I looked out the window. I checked my phone. I paced some more. I put on my shoes so I had a reason to sit down. I checked my phone. I took my shoes off. I put boots on instead. My palms were sweating.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

Since he hadn’t warned me with a customary arrival text, his knock startled me. I jumped violently and nearly tripped as I hurried to answer the door. I took a deep breath before palming the doorknob to reveal myself to my doubtful guest.

“Hello.” His voice was melodious without singsong. “How are you.”

A matter-of-fact statement more than an actual question.

“I’m good, thanks.” I sputtered. I’m sure it came out fine, but in that moment, I felt like I was melting into a puddle at the foot of the pedestal on which I had suddenly and inexplicably mounted him. Despite having made his acquaintance years prior, I had never noticed until then the sultry charm that radiated from him. All at once, I became a poor, foolish moth, ensnared by his hypnotic dark flame.

As I stood there face to face with this familiar stranger, I remember very clearly wondering: What kind of trouble am I gonna get into tonight?

“Shall we?”

I stepped out into the warm evening, and he offered me his cool hand. He guided me to his car, where he opened the passenger door for me, beckoning me forth into the mysterious unknown of this misadventure I was about to embark upon. The dewy grass licked at my toes. In the end, I had ditched the ankle boots in favor of sandals.

He closed the door gently behind me and I watched as he stalked around to the driver’s side. He carried himself with a subtle air of showmanship. How have I never noticed him before?

He took his place in front of the steering wheel and, right before putting his key into the ignition, he paused to look at me.

His crow-black eyes feigned an inconspicuous softness. Fully beguiled, I dropped my defenses just long enough for him to slither down into my soul. Like a hungry snake, his concentrated stare coiled around my heartstrings and swallowed me whole from the inside out.

He flashed a coy grin in my direction, and then his engine revved.

We found ourselves in a cozy booth at his favorite hole-in-the-wall martini lounge. He sat across from me in our dimly lit alcove and two cocktails - a dirty gin martini and a bourbon concoction garnished with a poached pear - magically appeared. There was a candle on the table between us that contoured his face, cutting his cheeks with dancing shadows.

The spark in his eyes matched the twirling flame. My legs were crossed tightly, nervously beneath the table, and I felt a surge of anxious heat swell between them.

After taking a sip from one of the glasses - we shared both drinks between us - he would place it aside, as if to reduce the barriers between us. Resting his forearms on the edge of the table, he folded his long fingers delicately in on themselves and looked well beyond my pupils as he spoke. The conversation was a blur, but I hung on his every word.

The dried up cocktails were replaced with two new ones, and before I knew it, those glasses were empty too.

“Let’s make a move,” he said. A command, not a suggestion.

The bartender insisted we take a shot before we leave. An herbal liqueur of sorts - bright green and rather potent. It was like freezer burn sliding down my throat. I tried my best to maintain my composure, knowing that he was paying close attention. It was harsh at first, but the discomfort eventually subsided to a curiously enjoyable chill in my chest.

To this day, I am still conditioned to believe that I genuinely love the sensation of that drink assaulting my senses. Maybe it was meant to serve as a metaphorical warning for what was to come. If so, it failed terribly.

He thanked the bartender with a firm, yet friendly handshake and ushered me towards the door.

We strolled arm in arm through the quiet downtown streets. I can assume we talked about something, but between the apprehensive buzzing in my head as well as my loins, I found myself somewhat distracted.

Our wandering led us to the river’s edge where the great iron skeleton of an old bridge - looming vestigial remains of an industrial past - stood ominously before us.

We followed the steps down to a path that ran beneath the bridge. Without a word of warning, hidden by the shadows of this imposing steel specter, he took me in his arms and pressed his lips to mine. They were soft and deliberate. I felt my entire being swoon into his.

We pulled away for a moment. Our eyes found each other in the darkness and began to adjust. The details of his face slowly appeared piece-by-piece, line-by-line in the subtle glow of the moonlight. His pointed gaze complimented the deliberate angles of his face, and his dark hair fluttered softly in the breeze around his ears and across his forehead. As his eyes drank me in, my chest tightened its grip to keep any butterflies from escaping.

His hands found their way to the small of my back and held me firmly in place. Our hips lined up and I felt his excitement rise and press into me. I moved my mouth back towards his. My kisses were hungrier than before, lips ravenously grabbing at his like a small child who was still too young to understand the point of dinner table etiquette. His tongue teased at mine in the spaces between my greedy reaches, and his vampire smile latched on to my bottom lip. It lingered there for a moment as his hand moved up the flesh of my spine beneath my shirt. I felt every drop of my blood flush to my groin.

Taking me by the hand, he led me to a natural bench of rocks and moss just off the path. He sat down and invited me to stand between his legs as our lips found each other once again in the darkness. I rested my hands on his shoulders for support and felt my fingers dig deeply into his flesh as my passion rose.

We heard some kids on bikes coming up the path. He wrapped his arms around my waist as if to conceal me from these intruders as his mouth moved away from my lips and down the length of my neck. His breath was hot and I felt hairs all over my body stand at attention. A fiery shiver, much like the one I had just swallowed at the bar, ran down my spine, and the clamor of the bicycle gang dissipated as quickly as it had arrived.

His tongue traced a line from my neck to my clavicle, leaving a snail trail of saliva in its wake, which invited the cool breeze to take part in the action. He unbuttoned my shirt and buried his face into the valley between my breasts. He then found a nipple with his tongue, which he nibbled gently before exploring in the other direction for its partner. One hand slipped in front to palm the wetness he had left behind.

An overwhelming undulation rippled through me and my head dropped back, my hair sweeping the back of his hands. I pressed my pelvis into his chest as he continued his oral investigation of my body.

Then he stopped, gently backed me up, took my hand, and guided me up the stairs.

At the top of the staircase, we found ourselves at the former entrance to the old bridge, a chain-link fence now barring entry to the road that still led to the other side. A sign warned that trespassers should dare not cross. But tonight was a night to be bold.

I took the lead and climbed several feet up to the top of the fence. With as much grace as I could muster, I stuck my landing on the other side. I took a few slow paces down the middle of the faded asphalt before I heard him begin his clanking ascent behind me.

His feet connected with the pavement. I turned around to greet him, and he moved swiftly towards me. Like magnets, opposite poles pulling together with unhesitating intention. In a lip-locked tango, we moved a few paces along the dotted line towards the center of the bridge. I then pulled away to face forward for the rest of the walk. Though I was slightly ahead of him, he wouldn’t let go of my hand. In that instant, he was in control, and I didn’t care to question his authority.

In the middle of the bridge, the sounds of the city all but faded away. We stood in that space, disconnected from reality, literally suspended in our own private corner of the universe if only for a moment.

I sat down on the pavement in front of him, leaning back onto my hands as he calmly scanned our surroundings. He then got down on his knees in front of me so that our eyes were on an equal level. Leaning in, he caressed my jawline with his hand and kissed me with a gentleness that matched the breeze skimming over us.

Wordlessly, he proposed I lay back on to the pavement behind me. As I reclined, he mirrored my movement with his own body, pressing his whole self gently on top of mine. He cupped the back of my head to soften the landing as he lowered it slowly to the ground.

He buried his face into the crook of my neck and I gazed up into the stars above us. His hand moved along the side of my body down to my hip as my hand slipped under his shirt to feel the strength of his torso.

Eyes closed, our lips blindly reached out to find each other again. I moved one hand between us to carefully unbutton his shirt while our tongues lapped voraciously at each other.

He leaned back onto his knees to remove his shirt. The amber glow of timeworn lamps above highlighted the topography of his noble body and a light spread of dark hair across his chest.

The hungry panther leered down at me about to strike. But first, he placed his shirt under my head as a sort of crude cushion. Satisfied, he unbuttoned my jeans and tugged them down, peeling them slowly off my legs.

This new level of exposure caused me to erupt with goosebumps, and again tasted the hot-cold echoes of that powerful shot. I suddenly felt shy as his eyes drank in every inch of my body, lingering on the lacy black panties he had uncovered.

He flashed a fiery smirk at me once more before diving down between my legs. Laying on his front, he leaned his head on my inner thigh as he explored the other with ginger fingertips. With two fingers, he traced the line of my groin and hovered over my vulva. I could feel the warmth of his breath on me as his fingers magically coaxed shivers out from somewhere between my shoulder blades.

Kissing gently at me over my panties, he moved up to my swollen clit. A surge of electricity forced my eyes closed when his lips finally made themselves known to my flesh. He teasingly retreated from the apex of my groin and nibbled at my inner thigh. It almost hurt, but it only made me yearn for him more.

Yearning. That’s what I felt with every fiber of my being that night. My depths yearned to meet his.

He continued his calculated teasing, kissing, stroking, biting… I became completely overwhelmed.

All at once, I pushed him off of me and rose to my knees, anchoring myself as I unbuttoned and unzipped, tugging feverishly at his jeans. He followed my lead and tore them off along with his boxers, revealing an eager erection.

I pushed him down to lay on the ground where I had just been, taking but a second to admire his strong yet vulnerable form in its nakedness. I crawled on top of his upright cock and slid it slowly inside me.

I let out a primal moan as I felt him expand the ridges of my vaginal wall. He placed his hands on my hips as I arched back in worship to the dark heavens expanding above us. I ripped aggressively at my top, pulling it overhead and adding it to his makeshift headrest.

Bowing myself over him, my forehead touched his as I slowly moved my wet lips up and down the length of his shaft. Despite the cool summer breeze swimming between us, perspiration formed like a subtle morning dew on our faces.

He growled in my ear and bit my earlobe as I brought him in even further, tapping into my impatient depths.

The pebbles on the pavement were starting to dig into my knees. I rose on to the flats of my feet and squatted over him. He looked up to watch him move in and out of view from between my legs as I consumed him anew with every thrust. With one hand on the ground to stabilize myself and the other entwined in his hair, I pulled myself closer to him.

I wanted to lose myself completely in this man. This man I hardly knew. I wanted to taste his hunger, to feel his passion, to become his pulse, his blood - the same blood engorging his voracious cock, which was thrusting vehemently ever deeper inside me.

Snarling, I bit into his shoulder. He moaned violently and flipped me over onto my back. For a fleeting second, he towered over me with angry desire while I lied spread eagle on the ground in front of him. He then plunged back into the pool of passion still flowing freely between my lips.

I felt tiny stones perforating my scalp as my nails carved love scars into his back. My moans grew in both intensity and volume as his pace gradually increased. The pulse in my clit was deafening.

He grew even more rigid inside me as his testicles pulled in close to his body. His whole form pulsated with a burgeoning energy; I felt euphoric as it seeped in through my skin.

Clinging to him as if I would fall into the earth if I let go, I felt his release. His thrusts simultaneously slowed and deepened as he succumbed to his pleasure. I reveled in the moment, feeling the energetic overflow reverberate through my own body.

Swooning a tiny death rattle, he collapsed on top of me. I held him as he breathed into me, feeling the deep swell of each respiration as it swirled to mix with the tender zephyr that had embraced us throughout our expressions of bliss.

I gazed once again into the stars above, consumed all at once by both a reverent bliss and an intoxicating sense of foreboding.

#lewis tuesday #WHAT THE FUCK HOW ARE YOU GUYS THIS TALENTED #submission

[whippedkoalas]

Hello everyone! I’m late, because I forgot my computer last night and I posted it on the wrong blog this morning (lol), but here is the promised fic for Christmas.

I hope all of you are spending these holidays like you want to. Thank you for always being lovely to me. I’m sending big virtual hugs to every single one of you.

Take care.

Christmas time is always special. You hear about Christmas on TV, the streets and shops are decorated, you might even be on holidays. It’s the time where the year ends, too.

A lot of people associate family time with Christmas times. And that’s where it starts being complicated for people who aren’t in touch with their families.

For the past 5 years, Noora and William have spent Christmas time on their own. Just the two of them. Their friends all have family gatherings to attend and they really don’t want to spend time with their respective families. The first Christmas they spent together they went to New York. The second one they stayed in Norway, but went to Flaam. Then they stayed in Oslo the year after. Last year they went to Prague.

This year, they’re staying in Oslo because they just bought a house in the suburbs of the city and do not have the budget to do anything fancy.

Furthermore, Vilde organized a party with everyone.

All the girls will be there. Isak and Even, Jonas, Chris, Yousef, Elias, and Eskild as well.

It’s not something they can do a lot because they all have their own lives now, but this year they really wanted to do something special.

They’re having a Christmas Eve Brunch. Vilde has been sending forms and messages and emails to organize this for months now and it was her idea to meet in the morning so that Chris, Jonas, and Eskild could come.

They all have been sent a list of things to come with.

They decided to organize a Secret Santa as well.

MONDAY 24TH 09:07

Vilde doesn’t live too far from their new house, and the weather isn’t terrible this morning, so Noora and William arrive early. The whole house is decorated already.

Noora and William were in charge of fruit juices.

“Vilde?” Noora shouts, entering the house.

They hear noise in the kitchen, probably the reason why Vilde didn’t hear them knocking.

Vilde accepted to host the Christmas brunch in her grandmother’s house. She has been living in this house for a while now, since her grandmother’s death.

When they get to the kitchen, they find Vilde cooking.

“Hello, Vilde ?”

Vilde turns her head instantly.

“Noora! Oh is it 9:30 already?” she looks at them in panic and only relaxes a bit when they tell her no.

Soon, Vilde gives them tasks to do. Before they know it, everyone has arrived.

They all settle in the living room. The decoration is outdated and even terrific but Vilde swears on her life she hasn’t had time or money to redecorate the whole house.

MONDAY 24TH 10:18

The whole table is full of different food everyone has brought. Everyone is talking and laughing. Only Vilde is a bit stressed.

“it reminds me of Sana’s Eid party,” Noora says to William, who nods in agreement.

“do you want some orange juice?” he asks in response, even though he has a glass for her already in his hand. Noora nods.

Chris is not far from them, chatting with Elias and Eskild. Eskild is trying to get the number of one of Chris’ co-worker.

In a corner, Yousef and Sana are arguing about the table decoration. Yousef is smiling fondly at his fiancé who is struggling with the napkins.

Vilde and Even are in the kitchen, trying to hide the birthday cake for Sana.

Isak and Jonas are chatting together with Eva, like old times.

Christina is sitting on the floor, playing with Vilde’s cat.

Noora watches them all doing their own thing but together nonetheless, tears in her eyes.

William takes her in his arm.

“Hey, what’s up?”

Noora shakes her head and snuggles against him. “I’m just emotional. It’s a great gift to have them still in our lives even five years after.I can’t wait for them to open their gifts.”

William smiles.

MONDAY 24TH 10:43

Vilde asked them to sit down around the living room’s table again. She and Chris have organized a game.

They are playing “two lies and one truth, Christmas with high school friends edition” according to Chris, which means that they have to find situations that happened (or not) with someone who is in the room or at least during their high school years.

They decided that Eva was the first to go, even with her protests because she doesn’t have any ideas.

“okay. 1. when we were in middle school, Isak discovered that Jonas and I were together because he found us making out in the school’s toilets.”

Isak chuckles.

“2. Christoffer and I actually dated for the first six months of our last year but we didn’t say anything. Or at least I didn’t.”

Eva smiles cheekily at Chris.

“3. Christina and I went to a double date once. It was shit, I ended up going home alone, but Chris got luckier and went home with my date.”

“There is no way those stories happened and you didn’t tell us.” Sana points out. “no way. They are all lies”

“You didn’t date Chris” William says.

“it’s for sure the first one because Chris would have spilled the tea about the double date on the group chat, while she was banging Eva’s date” Vilde adds.

Chris starts laughing out loud.

They all start giving argument to guess what is the truth when William says in Noora’s ear “Jonas and Isak are quiet. So the first is the truth.”

Noora gets one point.

They continue sharing stories about each other. They learn that Yousef had a crush on Sana since basically forever according to Elias.

Chris reveals that William had a discount on their russbus because he slept with the girl who was selling it. (“That’s prostitution,” says Noora.)

Jonas’ truth is that his mother asks him every time she sees him if he’s going to marry Eva someday. (No.)

Vilde reveals she still sees Magnus once in a while.

Chris tells them Sana and she sold their russbus for much more money than they should have.

Noora says she lied about Eskild’s birthday to Eva’s to go on a date with William. (Eva hadn’t realized.)

While Eskild tells everyone he used to steal everything he needed from William and Noora back when they lived together, Noora snuggles into William’s embrace and tells him “you’re next. Do it now”

Trying not to get the others’ attention, he replies “are you sure?”

She nods. “I would have laughed. But you won’t. So do it.”

When it’s his turn, William tries to be as serious as possible.

“1. Chris and I spent a night in our school. By accident, but we did.

2. Noora and I are having a baby.

3. Last year, when we went skiing, the boys and I lied to you girls, and we went to drink something instead of skiing like we told you”

Chris, who is the only one who knows what is the truth, still takes a few seconds to register what’s happening.

“Holy fucking shit! No way!”

Everyone else is silent, trying to guess if William is joking or not.

Then when they realize that he’s not and yes, William and Noora are having a baby, they start talking and screaming and cooing all at the same time. Noora just nods, shyly. She’s still sitting almost on William’s lap. He kisses her forehead.

“so yes. We didn’t plan on telling you through a game, but I haven’t spent the night with Chris in Nissen and we really went skiing with the boys last year…” he says, while the others are watching him with wide eyes.

“but I am definitely pregnant” Noora tells them, wiping tears from her eyes.

“fuck hormones” she adds, which makes everyone laughs.

MONDAY 24TH 11:33

After congratulating the new parents, they decide to give the secret Santa gifts. They all receive a copy of Noora’s first ultrasound as a special gift. That’s how Noora and William had planned on telling them.

They had agreed not to give anything too fancy or expensive, but not one of them has followed the rule.

They all laugh together and try to guess who is their secret Santa.

Some gifts are funny, like the sweater with dicks on it Christina found for Eskild, some of them are more personal, like the necklace William gives to Noora, with “in love since 2015” written inside of the heart. she tries to mock him because it’s a sappy gift, but she immediately started crying when she opened the box so she lost credibility.

Some gifts are surprising, like the beautiful purse Christoffer gives to Vilde, making sure she knows William did not help him.

After the distribution, Vilde suggests they could take pictures and they spent the next hour taking pictures of each other to be sure to keep those memories with them forever.

MONDAY 24TH 12:58

They all sing Happy Birthday to Sana. She didn’t really expect to have a birthday cake because she’s throwing a big party in two weeks, but she’s very happy to be surrounded by all of her friends for this special day. She makes a wish, as always. And Jonas makes a speech, as always.

“today, I wanted to tell you how much I am thankful to have an amazing group of friends. We’ve been friends forever and we still are.

But I feel like I should tell you that I am glad to grow up and grow old with you. I am happy to be able to see you going for new adventures, like parenthood. I think what we have is precious. We might not be able to see each other every week, or we might not all be the best of friends, but we care for each other and we are here for each other and I think that it’s a very rare bond that we have. So happy birthday, Sana. I can’t wait to see you blow out the candles every year”

#noorhelm #drabble

[monstablaq]

Noona, You’re So Pretty (Chapter 2)

Due to requests, I’ve decided to make this a multi-chapter story. Please enjoy chapter 2! More to follow :)

Chapter 1 is here 

Chapter 2

It had been a week. Her phone had been relatively quiet since the party. The group was filming a new music video and she was extremely busy with work. Besides the occasional message, she hadn't communicated with the group very much. She usually spent her Friday nights hanging out with Minhyuk but she hadn't heard from him. It was now Saturday morning. She laid in bed, feeling the exhaustion from the week hitting her all at once. Just to make sure she hadn't missed anything, she scrolled through her messages again. 

She stopped for a moment, remembering she had never responded to Wonho. While all he seemed to send was a simple ‘Hello’ accompanied by an emoji, she wasn't sure what to say. When she thought of him, it put her in an odd place. She knew she had left things a little awkward.--The Morning After She woke up with a pounding headache. The sun beamed right in her face, forcing her to awake. She rubbed her eyes and spotted an alarm clock beside her. It was about 11 am. She rolled to her side and put on her glasses to look around the room. Shownu was sprawled out on his bed with his head slightly hanging over the edge. She could hear him snoring. Hyungwon was curled up in a ball on top of his covers. She didn't remember them being there when she fell asleep, realizing they must've wandered in at some point throughout the night. She sat up and noticed the shirt she was wearing was not her own. Her panties still scrunched to one side felt rather uncomfortable and risqué so she quickly adjusted. She quietly slid out of the covers and stealthily made her way to the bedroom’s bathroom.Her reflection was quite the sight. Her mascara created scary dark bags under her eyes and her lipstick somehow made it to her ear. She searched the medicine cabinet for some face wash and pain relievers. She thoroughly scrubbed the makeup off and washed her face. She grabbed the pills and drank water from the faucet to swallow them down. She already felt a million times better.She made her way back into the room and searched for her clothing. She gathered them all in a pile and set them on the bed. She wanted to change but realized she'd look crazy wearing that outfit in the daytime. She looked around and noticed a pair of sweatpants hanging out of Wonho’s dresser.“I'm sure he won't mind if I borrow these,” she thought. She slipped them on and gathered her belongings. She spotted a gym bag and put everything inside then quietly snuck out of the room. She slowly shut the door behind her. She tiptoed into the living room, noticing Wonho knocked out on the couch. He laid there in his boxers, shivering in the air condition. She spotted a nearby blanket and covered him up, feeling really guilty for stealing his bed. She made her way to the front door, until she heard a voice. She froze.“We won't leave a mess they said,” she heard someone mumbling in the kitchen. They were cursing each of the member’s names. It was Kihyun. He was furiously scrubbing the counter with a dish sponge. She set the gym bag down and went up to him.“Good morning,” she said in a rather weak tone. She didn't realize her voice had almost disappeared. He stopped and looked at her.“Hey.” His frustration was temporarily halted.“Is everything okay?”He sighed. “Yes. It's just really annoying when no one else understands the term ‘drink in moderation.’ I woke up to find liquor and snacks spilled everywhere. I'm pretty sure Jooheon threw up in the garage too. Besides me, you're the only one that's woken up.” She patted his shoulder in sympathy. “I'm sorry you're stuck cleaning everything. I can help you now if you want.” He sighed again. “No, it's not your fault this place is a wreck. It was your birthday but I think you created virtually none of the mess. Besides you cleaned when we were away.”She smiled. “Thank you Kihyun, for being the responsible one. I only clean to help lessen your burden.” He chuckled. “They would be so lost without us.” He went back to cleaning as she checked the time again. It was getting close to 11:30. Her stomach began to rumble as it craved breakfast. She wasn't sure if she should wait around for everyone else to wake up or to simply leave on her own. She decided it was better to not bother anyone. She went to grab the gym bag again.“Kihyun, can you do me a favor?” she asked.“Sure, what's up?” “Could you let everyone know I headed home? I'll come back for my presents later.”He nodded. “Will you be okay getting home?” She forgot she was picked up. “Yeah, I can take the bus.” He set down the sponge and walked her to the door.Their footsteps woke up Wonho. He rubbed his eyes and saw her pass by. Kihyun opened the door. “Text me when you get home,” he said, sounding like a concerned mom. She smiled“Thank you for cooking and everything yesterday.” She gave him a hug.“I'm happy you liked it.” They waved goodbye as she headed out the door. As the door slowly closed, she locked eyes with Wonho. He realized she left. Kihyun headed back to the kitchen as Wonho gathered himself together. Kihyun noticed Wonho’s odd expression.“What's with you?” Wonho pushed back his hair trying to come back to his senses. “Where's noona going?” He played dumb.Kihyun looked at him. “She headed home.”Wonho sighed. “She didn't say goodbye..” he mumbled, feeling a bit heartbroken. Kihyun shook his head. “I wouldn't say goodbye either when you're looking like that,” he teased. “I'm sure she didn't enjoy seeing you drool on a pillow while only wearing boxers. That's probably why there's a blanket on you now.” He threw a pillow at him. “Yah, so what? I still look good.” He rolled his eyes. “Anyways, since you're up, you get to help me clean.” He grumbled. “Damnit.”--The phone rang. She was surprised to see Shownu’s number. She picked up.“Hello?”“Hey, hello, annyeong.” It was definitely Shownu. “What's up?”“So uh..” he scratched his head. “Minhyuk wanted me to call you and let you know he broke his phone.”“Eh? When?” “We filmed around water Thursday and his phone flew into a puddle. It was actually pretty funny.” “Oh no!” She could just picture Minhyuk panicking. It did seem a little amusing.“He's headed to the store to get it fixed and he asked me if you could meet him there.”She sighed. “Sure, just text me the address.”“Ah okay.” He hung up and sent the message. She looked up the address and saw the store was about 20 minutes away. She rolled out of bed, finally starting her day. She skimmed her drawers and looked for something to wear. All her favorite outfits were piled up in her laundry basket. She settled on a pair of jean shorts and a loose fitting, low cut blue v-neck. She applied just a little bit of makeup, making the focus her pop of pink lipstick. She put on her glasses and flats, grabbed her purse, and headed out the door.The drive was quick and uneventful. The roads seemed their normal flow of traffic for a Saturday. As she approached the location, she noticed it was an array of small boutiques. The shops were stacked on each other in a rather random fashion. She found a spot to park and wandered around. She couldn't seem to spot the shop. She checked her phone again. Was this right? As her eyes focused on the map, she felt arms wrap around her back. “Noona!!” She could hear someone sobbing “My phone won't turn on.” He learned his head against her shoulder. “Aww I'm sorry..” she patted his head like a puppy. Minhyuk let go and ran around in front.“They can fix it right?” He held her hands. “I have so many pictures I haven't saved on my computer.” She nodded to reassure him. “Everything will be okay.”Just then, she could hear someone grumbling behind her. She turned and was surprised to see Wonho there. His arms were crossed as he pouted and stared at the ground. His ball cap casted a shadow over his eyes, making him look like a serial killer from a drama. She could feel his anger. “Ah yeah..” Minhyuk remarked. “Since my phone won't work I can't use my GPS and you know how I get lost easily so Wonho said he'd drive me.” Wonho shot lasers out of his eyes. She hesitantly approached.“Hoseokie…” she stuttered. “How was the video filming?” She tried to change the subject.He didn't respond; his eyes said enough. Minhyuk tugged her arm and whispered to her.“He's been grumpy all week. Don't mind him.”She bit her lip nervously, taking a long breath. “Let's uh… get your phone fixed.” She faced the building and started to walk. Minhyuk jumped in front to lead the way. Wonho lagged behind.They walked up the stairs to the cell phone store on the 3rd floor. The store was empty besides a few employees walking about. Minhyuk ran to the service counter.“Can you save my phone,” he pleaded as if his life depended on it. She decided to stroll around the store and look at the cell phones. She knew finding him a possible replacement would be the most helpful. The latest Iphone caught her eye, sitting near the wall. She picked up the model and began to play with it. As she flipped through the apps, she felt Wonho coming close. He leaned on the wall beside her with his arms still crossed and the ball cap still casting a shadow. He stared at her with disgust on his face.“Are you just going to ignore me?!” he snapped. The room grew silent. Even Minhyuk looked at them in curiosity. She felt as if she sank into the floor. Wonho regretted speaking so loudly. He grabbed her wrist and took her out of the store. He took her to a secluded spot in the stairway. She curled into the corner.“I wasn't ignoring you..” she stared down at her feet. “I just..didn't know what to say.”“Didn't know what to say?” He took off his hat. His eyes were full of despair.“You couldn't even say hello? Are you that ashamed of me?” His heart ached. She felt guilty.“No it's nothing like that! I just don't know... what we are.” They grew silent. He scratched his head, not sure what to say. Suddenly, they heard Minhyuk approaching. They both gave a sigh of relief when he appeared.“What happened between you two?” he asked in concern. They both kept their eyes away.“I uh..” Wonho stuttered. “We were rehearsing lines.” She couldn't help but snort at the terrible lie. Wonho nudged her, giving a side eye. “Ah yeah…” she pretended to jog her memory. “He wanted to show me a scene.”Minhyuk was still confused but had other things on his mind.“Anyways, they said they can't fix my phone, but they can recover all of my data.” He seemed a bit relieved. “Ah that's...good to hear!” She put on a smile. Minhyuk sighed. “The only problem is it’s going to take a long time.” “How long?” Wonho asked.“Maybe.. 2 or 3 hours?” Minhyuk felt bad. “I feel like I should stay here..but maybe you two should go walk around.” They looked at eachother. “Are..you sure?” she remarked.“There’s lots of great shops and it’s nice outside. I know a great boutique you both would probably like.” They had no choice but to agree. They nodded and left Minhyuk by himself to take care of his situation. They headed down the stairs back onto the main street. She started walking in one direction and Wonho followed. The aura between them was still strange. She wanted to fix things. “Hoseokie..” she turned to him. He let go of his tough stature. “I’ll buy you coffee.” He smiled softly.They headed for a small cafe on the end of the street. The patrons generally looked to be mid 30s to 40s, making the odds of Wonho being recognized fairly low. She ordered an Americano and a Green tea latte, along with a small assortment of pastries. They found a spot close to the window and away from the crowds. Wonho took a sip of his Americano and grabbed a treat. “Thank you, noona,” he quietly said. His heat had finally cooled from earlier. He couldn’t help but glance at her. She looked beautiful as she split open her croissant. Her shirt draped gracefully, hugging her chest and gently touching her other curves. Her plump lips were drawing him in again like they were that night. He couldn’t stay mad at her. She wasn’t wrong to be confused because he was too. He just knew he wanted her.“So about the other day..” she started to speak. “I didn’t mean to just disappear. I felt weird being around everyone so I wanted to go home.” Wonho leaned back in his seat. “Usually the guy leaves the next morning,” he joked. “It’s not usually the other way around.”She laughed a bit. “I really liked those fishnets you know..” “I liked those sweatpants you took,” he teased. She took a sip of her latte. “I promise I’ll bring your clothes back. I still have to pick up my gifts.” “Oh yeah..” he glanced out the window. “Well..even though you left..it doesn’t explain why you didn’t text me back.” He playfully pouted. She poked his knee. “I told you I didn’t know what to say.” He nodded silently. She leaned in closer to him. “You know Hoseokie..” his ears perked up, hearing her say his name. “I wasn’t lying when I said I liked you. I had an amazing time that night.” He was pleasantly surprised. “It was..good?” He was curious. She blushed hard. “It was the best sex I’ve had.” He broke into his signature laugh. His confidence shot through the roof. “I was surprised to learn noona liked it from behind,” he smirked. She shot him a look. “I didn’t know you had a kink for mesh.” He choked on his drink and she laughed. “I could've died you know,” he joked.The atmosphere became much better between them. They playfully poked at each other’s kinks while enjoying their drinks. Finally, they knew what they had to do. Wonho finished his drink and looked straight at her. “Let’s be friends with benefits.��� After only about a minute, she agreed. It seemed to make the most sense between them. “I think I can go for that.” She reached in her purse and pulled out a bottle of water. “Does anything know about Saturday though?” She took a drink. He shook his head. “I haven’t said a word.” She thought for a minute. “We really have to be careful to keep things a secret. I don’t want to risk your career or for me to lose my friendships by us getting caught.” “You do have a good point.” He crossed his arms again. “Our manager thinks you’re a godsend.” “He does?” she giggled. “Well I do seem to make everyone happy.” “In more ways than one,” he winked and bit his lip. She kicked him. “I’ll only do it if you promise to keep things a secret.” He extended his arm. “It’s a deal.” They shook each other's hands and she kissed his cheek. They cleaned up the table and thought about what to do next. Suddenly Wonho remembered what Minhyuk had mentioned.“Let's go find that boutique.” He picked up his phone and pulled up a map. He found a 5-star boutique located upstairs in the next building. “This must be where Minhyuk is talking about.” He got up, tucked in his chair, and headed that way. She followed behind. The boutique was upscale and spacious. Beautiful clothing lined the white walls, leaving the middle of the store open for bright red furniture. A corner of the store was filled with lingerie and intimates, while another held a collection of shoes. Wonho headed to the wall with the men's clothing and started sorting through leather jackets. She stood beside him, unsure of where else to go. He glanced to her and smirked. “Do you need me to dress you?”She made a face. “I mean I.M dressed me the other day.”Wonho got a bit jealous. “He did...okay..” he lied. “But I can do better.” He took her hand and led her over to the dresses. He checked her out from head to toe, trying to imagine the perfect out. He scanned the racks, spotting a ruby red bodycon dress. He held it in front of her, eyeing the shape. “Here.” He shoved the dress towards her. “Uh..sure..”He continued down the line, sorting through the racks, piling on multiple outfits on her arms. When the pile got heavy she told him to stop. “I think this is enough..” She walked towards the dressing rooms. The dressing rooms were almost as spacious as the store itself. There were 5 dressing rooms lined up in a semicircle. In the center space was an ottoman matching the furniture in the main store. Between each dressing room there was a set of mirrors. Wonho took a seat on the ottoman as she seeked an attendant. She looked around but only spotted a teenage girl leaning on the counter. Her head was buried in her phone. “Excuse me..” “Yeah?” the worker responded; her eyes not leaving the phone.“Can you open the dressing room for me?” The girl reached below the desk and handed her a key. “There you go.” She walked back to the rooms and unlocked the middle one. She took the pile and went inside.“Show me each one,” Wonho remarked. “I’m gonna make you bangin.”She first tried on a silver skater dress. The bottom of the dress reached just below her thighs and flowed out gently. Without looking in the mirror she opened the dressing room door. Wonho glanced up from his phone. “Ehh..” his reaction was less than desired “Next.”She went back in to change. “You picked it out,” she mumbled. She tried on a blue romper next. She did the same thing as before, asking his opinion first. “That looks pretty good,” he remarked walking over to her. He adjusted the romper belt making the outfit hug closer to her curves. She blushed a bit at his fingertips grazing her hips. He smiled at himself approvingly. “That's better.”She changed again, placing the romper back on the hanger. She continued to try on clothing, stacking the rejected outfits on the door and the approved on a wall hook. She finally arrived to the bodycon dress. She took one look and felt a knot in her stomach. “There's no way I'm going to fit in this,” she thought out loud. She opened the door and waved over Wonho. She held out the dress.“This is way too small.” “It's supposed to be tight.” He handed the dress back to her. “Give it a chance.” She rolled her eyes but went back in. She grabbed her pile of rejections and tossed it out to him. “Put these back while I try to squeeze into this.” She wiggled the dress on and pulled it down. It fit her like a glove. She feared looking at her reflection knowing it would put every imperfection on display. She shyly opened the dressing room door.“Hoseokie…” His eyes widened as he admired her from head to toe. He licked his lips approvingly. “Noona, you look like a Goddess,” he smirked slyly. She took a few steps closer and looked in the mirror. She was amazed at herself. He stood behind her and checked the reflection, adjusting a few little bunches. As he checked her out one more time, his lust growing for her. He hesitated to make a suggestion, thinking it was just his dirty thoughts creeping in. She could tell he was holding back.“What is it?”He leaned in close, wrapping his arms around her hips. She stood there confused. He took a breath then whispered in her ear. “It would look even better without a bra.” Her jaw dropped in shock, still, she couldn’t argue. The bra could be seen too clearly through the dress. It ruined the aesthetic of the outfit. “Okay let's see.” She went back in and started to undress. Wonho leaned his back against the wall waiting for her to come out again. She took off her bra and slipped the dress back on. She cracked open the door, summoning him to enter. “Eh?” he looked around. The dressing room area was empty. She pulled him in. “How does it look?” She posed for him. He bit his lip hard. “Fucking sexy.” He couldn’t hide his excitement. He kept his hands behind his back, restraining himself from running fiddling with her dress. “Hoseokie...you must be proud of yourself.” “What do you mean noona?” “You got me wearing just want you wanted.” He smiled wide. “Well you like it don’t you?” “Mm..maybe,” she teased. “I have to admit you have good taste.” “I’m the fashionista king!” He bragged, showing off with a flex. “Hmm..” she looked over his outfit, wanting to make a smart remark about his own clothing choices. When she looked down, she couldn’t ignore the bulge in his black athletic pants. She slid her dress up above her thighs and kneeled on the carpeted floor. His eyes widened in confusion. “Noona, what are you doing?” She tugged at his waistband. “My friends with benefits duty calls.” His jaw dropped looking down at her. He was as turned on as ever. She pulled down his pants and boxers at the same time, revealing his hard cock. He brushed her hair back, admiring her beauty in this naughty angle. She slowly traced his entire length with her tongue. He breathed out with growing ecstacy. Her hand gripped the base, positioning his cock in front of her lips. She teased his tip, putting her lips around it and popping it off. He laughed. “Are you trying to torture me?” “Maybe,” she smirked. She moistened her mouth and sucked on his tip; her tongue swirling circles around it. She slowly moved her mouth further up, taking him in deeper. She tugged down his pants and boxers more as it was getting in the way. Suddenly, she noticed something she hadn’t before. She took her mouth off and looked at his thigh. She sat back on her knees. “Why didn’t you stop,” he whined, pouting his lips. She giggled. “How did I miss your tattoo?” She scratched her head. He laughed. “I mean, it was dark and you were pretty drunk. I actually have two more.” “I’ve seen the one on your foot but where’s the other one?” She was so curious. “My other one is here.” He showed turned to the side and showed her his right butt cheek. Her eyes grew wide. “You have an ass tattoo?” She couldn’t believe it. “I mean the flower is rather pretty.” He smiled. “I thought hard about getting them. I’m glad they didn’t scare you off.” “Tattoos are super sexy. It makes me like you even more.” She smiled again, waiting to play with his cock. He bit his lip; his body begging for the action to continue. His cock was already leaking precum from this sudden excitement. She slowly licked it off. He moaned at her tongue poking his slit. She smirked up at him and took him fully into her mouth. She sucked hard, sliding up and down his shaft. Her hot breath made his cock tingle sending shivers up his body. His hands grabbed the back of her neck with his head leaning back. His eyes closed as her throat closed around his thickness. He wanted so bad to face fuck her but he worked hard to hold back. He tightened the muscles in his thighs to fight the urge. She moved a bit closer, gripping his thighs to balance herself better. She noticed how tight they were and giggled, making the sensation even greater. He began to moan louder and grip her neck tighter, pushing her throat even further. She coughed a bit at the sudden added length. Her hands moved up further and around to his firm behind, grabbing it full force. He started sweating from the pleasure and removed his black shirt, exposing his muscular torso. Her eyes gazed up his naked body, making her own body hot. She spread her legs, rubbing her clothed pussy against the carpet. She wanted him in her so bad.She needed to catch her breath from working on him so hard. She leaned back against the wall and took a break. He dropped down on the floor beside her and got close. He kissed the corner of her lips and put his arm around her tummy, wanting to make her feel comfortable. She started to laugh to herself.“What's so funny?” he smiled, pulling her in closer.She looked at the dress. “I should probably buy this first before ruining it.” He chuckled.“You're going to buy it right?” She searched for the price tag. Her eyes grew big. “Wow this is...too much.” She started pulling it off. He grabbed her wrist and pinned it to the wall.“I'll buy it for you.” He nodded in the direction of the other chosen clothes. “I'll get all of those for you too.” She was taken aback.“No you don't need to do that.” She shrugged him off. He thought up an excuse.“I still owe you a birthday present,” he insisted. “Plus I picked them all out for you.”She sarcastically sighed. “I guess I'll let you buy them for me.” She thanked him with a kiss. She finally caught her breath and crawled onto his lap. Her arms were around his neck and she smiled looking into his eyes. He knew what she wanted. He reached for his wallet, hoping to find protection. Sadly, there was none to be found. He groaned in frustration. “The one time I need it and I don't have one. Damnit.” She rubbed his chest. “I suppose if this is our thing, I'll look into birth control.” She slid back onto the ground and jerked him off. “I won't leave you hanging.” He watched as she continued; her head back to bobbing on his cock. He could feel himself coming closer with each swallow. He put his hands behind his head and thrusted to bang the back of her throat. As he was just about to warn her he was about to cum, his phone rang loudly. He panicked and dove for his pants pocket, dragging her along with him Without thinking, he answered.“Where are you guys??” a concerned Minhyuk asked. “I've been texting you forever!” Wonho quickly looked at his inbox. He somehow missed 20 messages. He put his mouth back to the phone. “I'm so sor- ahh.” Just as he spoke, he came hard; his load filling her mouth with his filthy white liquid. She smirked at him, swallowing it whole. Amazed by what he saw, he dropped the phone. He snapped out of his daze and picked it back up to hear Minhyuk yelling ‘hello.’“Hey we’re at the boutique. We can meet you in a few.”Minhyuk smiled. “Actually I'm right outside. I'll meet you inside!” He hung up the phone. Wonho jumped to his feet fast. “Minhyuk is here.” He tripped trying to hop into his pants but managed to put them on. She wiped her mouth and stumbled to her feet. She had to come to her senses.“You need to get out of here now!” She opened the dressing room door and practically shoved half naked Wonho out of the room. She tossed his shirt to him and slammed the door. He put it over his head just as Minhyuk spotted him.“Always showing off,” Minhyuk laughed, oblivious of everything. Wonho turned bright red. He finished getting dressed and caught his breath. Minhyuk glanced around. “Where did noona go?” Just like clockwork she came out. Her normal clothes were back on. She brought out the outfits and showed them to Minhyuk.“Look at all the clothes Hoseokie is going to buy for me!” “Wow really?” Minhyuk was so confused but happy for her. He couldn't help but smile. “I bet you look great in them all, noona.” The three of them headed to the register. Minhyuk and her chatted while Wonho paid for the clothes. He handed her the bags and they headed out of the store. They found a spot outside and stood in a circle. It was time they said goodbye. “Thank you for meeting up with us noona.” Minhyuk gave her a hug. “I want to hang out longer but the process took forever. Now we have to head to dance practice.” “I completely understand,” she reassured him. “Next time let's spend more time together.”“I'll call you tonight, okay?” She nodded. She said goodbye and headed to her car. As she walked away, Wonho realized he was missing his hat. He recalled wearing it last in the cafe.“I forgot something. I'll be right back.” He jogged to the cafe and stopped by the table where they sat. He checked under the seat and found his hat on the floor. As he reached to grab it, he spotted something right beside. It was a condom. He picked both objects up and headed out.

Click for Chapter 3

#Monsta X #wonho #monsta x smut #monsta x fanfic #monsta x wonho #monsta x scenario

[therandomfics]

Strangers

Most of my friends aren’t here anymore. They all moved away for college, or graduated and went somewhere else to start their careers. I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t lonely. My job is very demanding and takes up a good majority of my time, but I just want to know that there’s some good left in what I’ve come to find as a miserable pit of a city. I’m not looking for someone to sweep into my life and then leave just as quickly. I want friendship and then maybe more, depending on the situation. Please don’t get angry if I reply slowly or not at all for a few days. I’m not the best at this whole online dating thing. :) 

You clicked submit and sat back to refresh your page and look it over once more. Online dating was not scary, it was the fact that your online profile was supposed to be a different identity, but you realized that you were exactly what your mystery perp was looking for. 

Earlier that day, Captain Lyndell Walker had approached you and given you a new task. 

“It’s starting to look like all of his victims have one thing in common: Meet And Mingle.” Captain Walker was clueless about anything online. He was in his fifties, married for 20 something years and had three kids. They probably knew more about Meet and Mingle than their father. “You need to create a profile, do some digging. Probably wouldn’t hurt you to go on a few dates.” 

“That’s harassment, Cap,” you replied with a smirk. “But okay. So I’m using my own pictures, or no?”

“Yes. Be you. Well - okay, be you, just more friendly. And really, Sullivan.. be careful. Make the profile and we’ll meet tomorrow to see what we have narrowed down from TARU.” 

The ding on your computer refocused your attention, an alert flashing at the bottom of the screen. A new message. How wonderful, you thought, exhaling the heaviest sigh you could muster. You clicked on the envelope icon and scowled. 

Hey, threestrikes, like those pictures... wanna come over?

“Gross,” you muttered and deleted the message. How did anyone meet another human being online if this was the kind of interaction that was deemed normal? 

A few hours passed and you made your way back to the computer to check your inbox. Twelve messages. Impressive. 

Hey sexy.. DELETE. 

Hi my name is Phil..Youup. DELETE. 

Three were merely inappropriate pictures. Only two really went beyond the normal “hi what’s up” of messaging. 

BHUNT03: Hey, threestrikes, my name is Brendon. I’m 34, I work on Wallstreet (big deal right?) and I am also feeling a little lost. I’m from Austin, TX, but moved here about two years ago with a former love who has since ended our relationship. I’d love to talk more if you have time. I’m busy too, but hopefully we’ll get some screen time together. Talk soon. 

Austin, Texas. Southern accents didn’t really appeal to you like they did most people, but you knew you had to be nice and get your head out of your ass if you planned on making any sort of headway. 

isirac: Threestrikes and I’m out? Yankees or Mets? I’m Dominick, by the way.

You couldn’t help but to reply to that one. 

Actually, I’m a Red Sox fan.... so, neither. :) Strike one for you, Dominick. I’m Y/N. Nice to meet you. Maybe I can convert you to the dark side. 

Your eyes were heavy when you realized the time. Nearly midnight. It was definitely time for bed. You knew you’d have a busy day ahead of you and you couldn’t disappoint. 

You met with TARU the next day and discovered a few interesting things about your suspect. The two victims had matched with and chatted with fifteen of the same men. A list of their usernames was provided to you for reference. Of the fifteen men, both victims had given their phone numbers to each of the men, under the pretense of setting up a time to meet and get to know one another. It was your job, TARU said, to chat with each of these men and try to narrow down the list of suspects as quickly as possible. 

It wouldn’t be an easy task, but it beat dragging your feet through paperwork for another 8 hour day. Brooklyn had their fair share of crimes to follow up on, especially in your division of SVU, and you never felt like you were caught up. From what you heard, other areas of the city felt the same. You’d never gotten to meet any of them, even after being there for two years. You only knew your friends from your work in Narcotics, and you were glad to say you’d gotten out of that. 

You opened your laptop and began your task of hunting down the men on the list. Two of them, you found, had already messaged you. BHUNT03 and isirac. You composed a message to BHUNT03 and hit send. 

Hi, Brendon. I’m Y/N. It’s a pleasure to meet you - virtually. I’m from Boston and moved here when I was 17 with my family. Not nearly as cool as Texas. I also don’t work on Wall St, but my job is pretty great. I’m a teacher. Hope you had a great day! Talk soon. 

You’d managed to make it down the list and send each one of them a special message, hoping that your little touch of charm would seal the deal and get you a response. Fifteen sent messages and 20 unread responses, mostly from men who were treating a legitimate dating website like it was Craigslist. 

isirac: Don’t think that’s gonna happen, but I know the Yanks and the Red Sox are playing one another next month.. hint hint. 

You snorted and typed out a quick reply. 

Yeah, that could be fun, but we can’t sit together. I can’t be seen with a Yankees fan. 

isirac: Good point, I can’t be seen with a Red Sox fan. Maybe we’d better plan something else since you’re a shitty New Yorker? 

Shitty New Yorker or Amazing Bostonian? 

isirac: No such thing as an amazing Bostonian... sorry, Y/N. 

You had to laugh. The rivalry between NYC and Boston was strong, and while it mattered to you a little, you couldn’t help but find it somewhat charming. Be on your guard, you reminded yourself. You weren’t here to find a husband. You were here to find a killer. 

A few days went by before Captain Walker called you and asked you for an update. 

“It’s going well. TARU gave me a list of the guys the two vics had in common and I’ve talked to each of them. I actually have a date with one of them tonight. His username is arodisgod. I think I hate him, but that’s not the point,” you said with a laugh. “Anyway, I’m going to meet him at 7:30 at Starbucks, because I keep it wicked classy.” 

Walker snorted. “Alright kid. Just be safe, let me know how things go. You know you’re gonna have a tail, right?” 

“I know.” 

“Alright.” 

That night, you looked at yourself in the mirror. It was 7:00 and you needed to leave, but you found yourself critiquing your outfit instead. Was all black too somber? No, you couldn’t be somber. Your fake identity had you as a teacher. Teachers couldn’t be gothic, could they? Who knew. You changed into a yellow dress and threw your black cardigan on to tie everything together. Better than nothing. Who really cared? You were going on a fake date. Even if you ruled the guy out and ended up liking him, your whole relationship would have started on a lie. 

When you walked into the coffee shop, you looked around and realized that your date was waiting for you in the corner. He was shorter than his profile stated, but friendly and somewhat attractive. 

“Hi, Andrew?” you asked as you approached, a fake, warm smile plastered on your face. 

“Wow, yeah! Hi! Y/N, it’s nice to meet you,” he said as he stood and gave you a quick hug. “Please, have a seat. I know you don’t have a lot of time tonight but I’m really glad you decided to meet me.” 

You sat down and crossed your legs under the table. Apparently, he had already ordered you a drink. Green tea. Gross, but considerate. “Thanks for asking. It’s nice to meet you, too. I know we hadn’t spoken too much online but I figure, you only live once, right? Why not take your shot when you can?” 

“Right, I feel you,” he agreed with an excited nod. “Actually it’s funny you mention that, because I just got back from backpacking across Europe. I was gone for three months and just got back like a week ago.” 

If you could confirm that, Andrew was off the suspect list. 

“That’s really amazing!” you lied, and dropped your hand by your side. You held up 2 fingers and made air quotations; your signal to your tail that you were ready to go. Immediately, your phone rang. “Oh, I’m so sorry. It’s my land lord. Two seconds!” You answered the phone and the voice on the other end chastised you for ending the date so early. “I know. I know. Oh, that’s so awful. Okay, I”ll be there immediately.” 

Andrew looked at you mournfully. “Is everything okay?” 

You shook your head and feigned remorse. “I’m so sorry, but no, it isn’t. I’ve got to go. Apparently there’s been a burst pipe leaking into my living room. Let’s try this again another time,” you insisted, before you stood up and rushed outside and down the sidewalk. Dating, fake or not, was unreal. 

#svu fanfiction #sonny carisi fanfiction #sonny carisi x reader #sonny carisi #carisi x reader

[esthersnippe]

Becoming a Digital Nomad: A quick and dirty guide to UpWork

(My “office” on the Isla of Flores in Guatemala)

Freelancing is one of the best jobs I’ve ever had. 

Although now I have moved off of freelancing and am more of an independent contractor, I still pick up a few freelancing projects ever quarter.

Because it is simply a great way to make money. Loads of people are leaving their office and opting for something more flexible: according to the FreshBooks Self-Employment Report, potentially 27 million Americans will leave the traditional work in favor of self-employment by 2020. This shift would triple the current population of full-time self-employed professionals bringing the total number of workers to 42 million.

And that’s just in the US, imagine what these figures look like globally.

I’m guessing if you are here reading this, we’ve talked about it already and I have sent you the link, so you are pretty sold: but let’s review:

You choose your hours. No bosses saying “You’re ten minutes late!” or having to suffer through another 8-hour shift that just never seems to end. You pick when you work. If you are hungover and can’t bring it to the table: that’s your call. (But warning: you will not get the money if you don’t work.) 

You choose your projects. After the first couple projects (which is a bit of a mad and dirty dash, I am afraid) you get to start to get choices. Storytime! Once I was working for this American Museum Tour company. At first, they were loads of fun, and they even flew me to New York City multiple times, and I got a paid trip to Switzerland. Things were great, until the point they weren’t. Then I began to hate it with the passion of a thousand suns. So one day, I just quit. The next day, I found another project, and they paid me more money, and were a better company. It was bloody easy. Stop suffering. Pick a project you like and only stick with it until/if you stop liking them.  (Note: I have been with the new client for 3 years, and they are still a dream to work with.) 

You get paid real money. There is this idea that if it happens on the internet, maybe there is something sketchy about it. This could be true in some cases: but in this case, you get actual money (ok, sometimes it is in a different currency then the country you are living in, but you can turn it into your currency) that goes into your actual bank account and you can actually buy and pay for things. For sitting at home.  Doing stuff on your laptop. 

You can learn new stuff on the job. I definitely didn’t start out with all the skills I have now. I started off as a modest internet researcher, and through time, worked my way up to having this whole jetpack of skills that clients not only want, but need. Don’t feel daunted about not being able to do everything right away. Start with a good project, and be a sponge. Learn as much as you can, because these skills are valuable (remember the part about making real money?) 

You can go anywhere in the world. As long as they have wifi, and your clients are ok with you being in a different timezone? You can go anywhere. Since working as a freelancer, I have travelled to, get this, 30 countries. Screw waiting around for a two-week vacation. Go see the world. And make some money while you do it.

Now, here comes the part where I bring that excitement down to a reasonable level.

There are some hard truths about freelancing I am going to be frank about.

The first is that it is real work. You’ve got to be dedicated and you absolutely have to have a rock-solid work ethic. If you don’t, you will not get very far, because this is not the kind of job you can “float by” on. People will drop you like a hot potato the second you stop performing. And there is no safety net. You will have to hustle your own projects for the first bit: people will not be chomping at the bit to get you. In fact, they will probably, most like, almost definitely ignore you for the most part. There are literally 12 million users on UpWork: if you aren’t hustling, you aren’t going anywhere. Apply for ten positions a day. Get up at 4am for a Skype interview. Be charming af. Follow up, then follow up again. Don’t let them forget you, and if they don’t hire you, ask why and then get better. You’ve got to get your own work. Lastly, you are probably not going to make mad money right away. The money is there, and you can have some of it, but you are probably going to have to do a bit of grunt work first, and I am talking up to 2-3 months at a low rate. But keep at it. There is a bunch of money and magic at the top of the mountain.

Still with me?

Ok. Let’s get into it.

Why UpWork?

So, when I first started freelancing, I signed up for a few different Freelancing websites that were around at the time: oDesk, Elance and Freelancer.   There were others I looked at, like Toptal and Fivrr. But I couldn’t see how people could make actual money to pay bills on Fivrr, but didn’t have high enough skills or experience for Toptal.   I got work within a few weeks of signing up for oDesk, and after seeing the cut that Freelancer was taking after one project, stuck with oDesk. oDesk merged with Elance, they changed their name to UpWork, and here we are.  

That being said: I love UpWork. At one point, one of my clients asked me if we could leave UpWork, and he would pay me directly. I agreed. That is $1000 I will never get back. He was a nice guy, but at that moment, I was screwed over, and there was nothing I could do. UpWork protects you from that happening. 

Secondly, with the sheer amount of freelancers on the site: clients are simply drawn to UpWork. They aren’t just looking for the cheapest: they are looking for the variety.

Note: I am not longer using UpWork, and work 100% on my regular clients and referrals. But there is no way I would have gotten there, or gotten so many skills, without UpWork, so I still think it is the best place to start.

Setting up your profile

Here are three great articles on how to set up a great profile:

Enhance Your Upwork Freelancer Profile for Greater Success

How to Create an Upwork Profile That Gets You Clients, FAST

Sample: Profile

I am not going to rewrite what they’ve said. Because that is a waste of time (hurray for understanding time management!)

But here are my top 6 tips:

Upload a profile picture where you look good. I mean real good. Don’t be an a** about it either. Clean, professional, and hot. That’s all. No party hats or dogs or sunglasses or duck-facey, off camera looks.

Pick 5 skills. Even though they let you have 10: be clear about what you can and want to do. Now, on the topic of skills: you do not need a journalism degree to be a writer. Or a photography degree to manage an Instagram account. Think about the kinds of things you like. Are you a grammar nut? Put those skills to work as an editor. Do you speak multiple langauges fluently? Become a translator. Do you love spreadsheets? That is a freaking skill, (wo)man! Are you generally a happy-go-lucky, I-can-get-shit-done kind of person? Be someone’s personal virtual assistant. You do not have to be defined by what you’ve already done, focus on what you like to do.  

Watch out for typos. I was hiring for this client once, and found a woman who was amazing. We had a skype interview and I was ready to sign on the dotting line, but at the last minute, my client looked at her profile and found a typo and said “No.” Simple as that. I was gutted, because she was really fantastic. Have someone proofread your profile, because it’s that easy for potential clients to move on to the next person.

Don’t worry about tests. Very few clients look at them. Or care. Even if you are in the top 5%. They are nice, but also, kind of a waste of time. 

Fill in your profile so that your bar goes up to 100%. Just do it. I know it’s work, but you’ll get more clients.

Set a reasonable rate for how long you’ve been on the site. Yes, I know you’d love to be paid $50 and hour, but if you’ve got zero experience or hours, you are not going to get clients. Honestly, start at $7-$10 an hour. Then after your first 100 hours, you can bump your rate up to what you think you should be getting. Why 100 hours? Because it puts you in a different search category: a better one. Wait...what are these search categories? Well, when a client is looking for someone, this is what it looks like:

See that massive jump in the number of  Freelancers (the bracket number) on the “Hours Billed” section? That means your competition decreases by more than half, and you can start to get more choosy about your gigs. 

On getting hired

Remember that thing I said about hustling? Yep. You’ve got to do that.

But here are some more tips.

Apply, apply, apply. Then apply some more. I don’t even know how many proposals I wrote in those first few weeks, but it was a lot. And here’s the thing, you can’t cheat. You’ve got to read the position, and write to them personally. All the low-end people cut and paste and never move ahead. Put some soul into it, especially at first.

Start small (I mean cheap): Although your insides might be screaming “I AM BETTER THAN THAT.” take 1-3 low paid one-off projects. Get a five-star rating and use it to propel yourself to the next freelancer level.

In the interview process: be as attentive as possible. This means responding right away to messages, and being available for interviews even if the hours are weird (remember the 4am comment? Yeah, I did that once). Follow up with them, and then follow up again. Be impressive.

On working as a freelancer

Wow! Have you gotten a gig? Good job! You rock! From here on in you are kind of a free agent, and it is between you and your client, but here are some tips.

Get really good at online communication. This means responding to emails quickly, and being clear. This means if at any point you don’t understand what your client wants: you ask them before charging them for work they didn’t need or want or is incorrect. Give them your email, Facebook and Skype, and ask them how their team communicates (Google Hangouts? Slack? Basecamp *gulp*) then be there.

Download the time tracker and stick to working when you are working. It takes three seconds to turn off the tracker, check your Facebook, and then turn it on again. But once you get a screen grab of you hanging out on Facebook, it looks bad. Also, I have come to suspect (from being caught more than once) that UpWork automatically looks for you slacking off, ie. Facebook.

Get your hours in. If they have given you hours, they expect the work to be done. Coming back without the work done with excuses and worse, not having filled up your hours? Bad. Remember the thing I said about them dropping you like you’re hot? Get the work done in the hours they’ve given you, or talk with them and discuss with them why you need fewer hours. That is far better than simply coming up short.

Getting good feedback is important. Even if this means swallowing your pride from time to time. Here is what they are going to rate you on: 

But wait: why is there public feedback and private feedback? Well, you know how you’ve got that job success thing on the side of your profile?  Over time, you get secret points. Those secret points work up to you being featured higher when the clients use the search tool. Also, you’ll get some cool perks in the future, like the Premium Freelancer program.

Lastly, and most importantly: GETTING PAID So, I have to be honest here. I have never fully figured out the timing of the payments. It goes through my PayPal, and whenever it hits a $1000 of earning, it goes into my bank account. There is a bunch of information here though. If you’d like to talk to me privately about payments (ie. Taxes and other trickier areas) feel free to message me.

I hope this gives you enough to get started. As I said before, freelancing is an amazing option if you are done with the office and dream about doing something slightly more, slightly different and have the gumption to do it. If you have any questions, want me to review your profile, or just want to talk more about freelancing— shoot me off a message, I love helping people get one step closer to freedom, be that fiscal or philosophical.

PS. Here is the list of countries I’ve been to while working as a freelancer: Austria, Belarus, Belize, Canada, Costa Rica, Croatia, Czech Republic, El Salvador, England, Faroe Islands, France, Guatemala, Germany, Honduras, Iceland, Lithuania, Mexico, Netherlands, Nicaragua, Norway, Panama, Poland, Portugal, Romania, Russia, Spain, Switzerland, Ukraine, United Kingdom, and the United States.

#upwork #freelancing #digital nomad #making money #independent contractor

[fardell24b]

Daria 2097 - Part 1.1

Daria 2097 – Part 1.1

Daria 2097

E.S.T.E.E.M.

Monday, September 16, 2097

Lawndale, Maryland

A blue car was driving along a crowded road. Inside the car, the words Destination: Lawndale High School, showed on the dash screen.

The lower-middle aged man put aside his tablet (from which he was reading the local news) and said. “You know, girls, it's not easy moving to a whole new town, especially for you, Daria, right?”

 “Did we move,” the older daughter, Daria Morgendorffer asked, as she turned from the window.

 Jake laughed. “I'm just saying you don't make friends as easily as... uh, some people. ”

 “Quinn for instance.”

 The younger sister directed her music app to direct the audio to the cars speakers, rather than her headphones.

 Jake was annoyed “Lexi – music off!” he said. The car obeyed and he turned his attention back to Daria. “That's not what I meant... necessarily. The point is, the first day at a new school is bound to be difficult...”

 Daria whispered. Loud enough for the car AI to pick up, but not her father. “Lexi – music back up!” Once the music was back up. “Speak up, Dad! Can't hear you!”

 “Uh, where was I?” Jake turned off the music with a swipe on the dash. “Oh, yeah...” He then saw the status on the dash change. Location: Lawndale High School drop off. Quinn opened the door and got out.

 “Don't get upset if it takes the other kids a little while to warm up to you.”

Quinn got out of the car and looked at the school. It looked better than the school she had left behind in Highland. 'I can be the most popular here, without all the bad stuff,' she thought, as she changed her suit to 'School Mode.'

 “Hi, you're cool. What's your name?” a pigtailed girl asked.

 Quinn directed her system to display her name on the malleable outer layer of the vest. 'Quinn Morgendorffer'.

 “Cool name,” a wavy haired brunette said, bemused by the method she used.

 'Let them speculate,' she thought. Then an alert in her eye glasses said Will U go out with me? Followed by a small picture that resembled a redheaded boy nearby. She was annoyed. She directed the system to send back 'Maybe' as a reply.

  “I'll try to help her through this difficult period of adjustment,” Daria said as she got out.

 “That's my girl! Wait a minute.”

 “See you, Dad!” Daria said as she went towards the school building.

 “OK, Lexi, back to Glenny!” Jake directed, giving 'her' his nickname for the new house.

 The destination field then said Destination: 1111 Glen Oaks Lane. The car closed the door that Daria had left open and drove off. Jake opened the app for his new Consulting Business.

  Jason Tanner noticed the younger sister as she passed by. “Hi,” he said.

 She waved back, and turned back towards the School. “Huh?” Belatedly, he realized that she had sent him a message. 'Am I sure it's her? It could be a coincidence,' he thought. 'Strange.' He looked at his watch unit, where the message beep had come from. 'Hi. I'm Quinn, nice to meet you.' 'A bit late to reply now.'

  Meanwhile, Principal Angela Li entered her office. She placed her tablet on the desk. “Lawndale High, transfer list of new students to active app.”

 “Done,” the High School AI said. “By the way, you know I prefer to be called...”

 The principal interrupted with a clearing of her throat.

 “Sorry, Principal Li.”

 “There was no trouble with the other schools?” she asked.

 “Only with Highland High, Principal Li. But the information was eventually transferred.”

 “Was all of it transferred?”

 “Yes. It also seems that that AI still has '70's hardware.”

 “I don't think so,” the Principal said as she reviewed the information on the tablet. The Morgendorffers caught her attention. It appeared that they had 'rocked the boat' at Highland...

 “Attention, Principal Li. All teachers except Anthony DeMartino have signed in.”

 The Principal sighed. “Is he in the staff room yet?”

 “Yes.”

 “Send him the standard recording.”

 “Yes. Principal Li.”

  The teacher in question was preparing his class notes for the day. “DeMartino! Sign in!” the Principal's message said.

 “Aagh! Why did I have to be born into a period of ubiquitous surveillance!” He turned to the nearby desktop unit, and placed his hand on the scanning surface.

 “Anthony DeMartino recognised, 8:34 AM.”

  After the new students reported to the office, the Principal lead them on a physical tour of the campus. Daria had attempted to do a virtual tour the night before, but the system wouldn't let her in. 'I suppose the Principal only allows virtual access to students,' she thought, as she heard the Principal tell them about the physical security for the fourth time. She also noticed that she was pushing the sports side of the school. 'What about the academics?'

  Twenty minutes later, they had returned to the administration area. “As you can see, our Lawndale High students take great pride in their school. That's why you'll each be taking a small psychological exam to spot any little clouds on the horizon as you sail the student seas of, Lawndale High.”

 “It seems that she's rather prideful of it,” a scarlett-haired girl said to Daria.

 “I agree,” she whispered back. Louder, she said. “S.O.S, girl overboard.”

 Quinn glared at her, while a prissy-looking girl stepped away.

 Daria smirked.

  “Quinn, I don't know why she's testing us together,” Daria said when Mrs. Manson had said that she would be testing them together.

 Quinn shook her head. To anyone else, it was a simple 'No'. To Daria however, it was 'I don't know either.'

 Daria sighed. “You can test me first. It will be less frustrating.”

 “I shall test the younger sister first,” Mrs. Manson said.

 “OK, but don't say I didn't warn you,” Daria said.

 Mrs. Manson turned her attention to Quinn and held up a picture.

 After a delay of 10 seconds, a message appeared on Manson's tablet. “Two people talking,” she said, reading the pertinent portion of the message. “That's right, Quinn, but what are they talking about?”

 After another delay, of 30 seconds, another message appeared on the tablet, detailing an interaction between two dating teens. “Very good, Quinn.” She turned her attention to the other sister. “Now, Dara, let's see if you can make up a story as vivid as your sister's.”

 “It's Daria.'

 “I'm, sorry, Daria. What do you see in the picture, Daria?”

 “Um... a herd of beautiful wild ponies running free across the plains.”

 “Uh, there aren't any ponies. It's two people.

 “Last time I took one of these tests, they told me they were clouds. They said they could be whatever I wanted.”

 “That's a different test, dear. In this test, they're people, and you tell me what they're discussing.”

 “Oh... I see. All right, then. It's a guy and a girl and they're discussing... a herd of beautiful wild ponies running free across the plains.”

 Mrs. Manson sighed. It seemed that the Morgendorffers were going to be as much trouble as Ms. Li suspected. “OK, you can both go to class.”

  After the Psychological test, Daria went to history. “Class, we have a new student joining us today. Please welcome Daria Morgendorffer. Daria, raise your hand, please.”

 Daria raised her hand.

 “Well, Daria! As long as you have your hand raised...” DeMartino gave an evil chuckle. Last week we began a unit on the Cold War. Perhaps you feel it's unfair to be asked a question on your first day of class.”

 “Excuse me?” Daria asked. 'Of course it's unfair. Good thing I'm familiar with mid-to-late 20th Century history.'

 “Daria, can you concisely and unemotionally sum up for us the Domino Theory.”

 “The Domino Theory was used to argue that if one nation in Southeast Asia became Communist, that other nations in the same region were also likely to adopt Communism. This theory ignored the complex internal politics of the nations in question.”

 “Very good, Daria. Almost... suspiciously good.” However with a glance at his tablet on the desk. He could tell that there hadn't been any internet activity in the room. “All right, class. Who can tell me which war the Domino Theory was used to justify?” He walked up to a boy in a football uniform. “Kevin! How about you?”

 “The... Omani War?” Kevin Thompson volunteered.

 “That came a little later, Kevin... a hundred years later. A lot of good men died in that conflict, Kevin. I believe we owe it to them to at least get the century right!”

 “Uh... Operation LunarSet?”

 “Son, promise me you'll come back and see me some day when you've got the Heisman trophy and a chain of Starbucks Knockoffs, and I'm saving up for a third pair of pants! Will you promise me that, Kevin?”

 “Sure!”

 “Can I come, too? I mean, if Kevin and I are still together,” Brittany Taylor asked.

 “We will be, babe. We will be.”

 “Ahh.. Brittany. Can you guess which war we fought in Southeast Asia due to the Domino Theory?”

 “Mmm... no.”

 DeMartino was losing patience. He grabbed his tablet to ensure that Brittany wouldn't cheat. “Please Try, Brittany!”

 “The Al'Oman War?”

 “Either someone gives me the answer, or I give you all double homework and a quiz tomorrow. I want a volunteer with the answer. Now!”

 Daria reluctantly raised her hand.

 “Daria, stop showing off!”

 'Of course.'

#angela li #anthony demartino #brittany taylor #daria #daria morgendorffer #esteemsters #fan fiction #jake morgendorffer #kevin thompson #quinn morgendorffer

[alexisltwu380]

9 Ted Talks That Anyone Working In We Buy Houses Atlanta Should Watch

How to Sell Your Home Fast into the We Buy Houses Investors

If the current madness in home and also the market unexpectedly have you ever viewing small yellow signs and big billboards that say, "We will buy your house" that you want to market your property quick and may be wondering that these guys behind the hints are all and can they do anything else to assist.

The indications have been in existence for three decades, however like every thing else, you simply see the things which can be of immediate value to youpersonally. While everyone can buy and sell residences within the usa most people just trade the house that they live in or hope to reside in. Acquiring houses minus the anticipation of residing in them-as a company, genuinely started to take off about 30 years ago when a few conference speakers spanned the county selling training in purchasing and selling houses for benefit.

Like any company, you can anticipate several the folks that buy homes to become proficient, honest professionals and others maybe not really proficient and some-that you'd want to avoid. The bottom line is the fact that some of the folks are able to help you sell a house quickly, some times in a couple of days and remedy issues. The others, I've found, will perhaps not actually answer the telephone, or telephone you back in the event you telephone and leave an email. Strange as it may appear, I've discovered that this reluctance to follow up on an outcome comes about in many areas in sales.

Thus, the first thing I'd propose in picking a house customer to bargain with is calling several, see who answers your telephone, and watch who comes out to your home and occurs whenever they agreed to reach. Maybe not high technology, but a great start. Who am I to tell you just how to form through those men? I happen to be just one and have already been doing creative real estate for decades in Florida, was previously a stockbroker and economic reporter to the Chicago Tribune. It's like going to a hacker to learn just how to make your computer system operation safe and sound.

And as among these, let me assure you there are good, competent men and women, who is able to raise the cash needed to buy and therefore so are knowledgeable of the way realestate works where you live.

There are also, and constantly, waves of new Individuals that are Learning just how to buy homes, plus a number of those who need to sell a house fast will be helping these novices know the trade.

Besides watching whether they reply your Telephone and also arrive at The full time agreed to get an appointment, I am going to wish to understand the length of time the individual was buying properties and just how they perform it. At the second installment of this set, we will start looking at strategies for checking out them, and in the third article, we will be studying phrases from the arrangement that they provide that you might need to avoid.

15 Best Twitter Accounts To Learn About Cash Home Buyers

One of the biggest pluses that the finest of these men and Gals can bring into the dining table to help you is that they have been educated that there are many techniques to promote a residence, methods which were used in commercial property estate for many a long time but that are rarely used in real estate.

While a lot of real estate representatives do not like creative real real estate, my broker was proficient and suggested a means to sell my house. We were hurt, but after thinking about that sold, also it worked out nice. There was still a real risk in exactly what I'd afterward and a hazard in any creative solution to a true estate earnings difficulty, however my knowledge was that which sent me we buy houses business and in the next several articles we will tell you the way it could help you and explore the risks.

You may have heard an advertisement on the radio, then you may have seen a advertisement on the local categorized's newspaper, or you might have seen signs posted on street corners. Whether you're mindful of the dwelling buying advertising or never, '' I understand they exist in your own city.

Should they have not captured your attention until they may now. Many of the local real estate buyers utilize similar language within their own promotion. Here are only several you might notice , we buy houseswe buy homes, '' I buy houseswe prevent foreclosure, we will purchase your home in 9 days, we buy houses in almost any place any state any scenario we buy houses in one day.

So, exactly who are those expert real estate purchasers? an average of, real estate buyers ' are real estate traders. They own small real estate investment companies which focus on buying houses out of motivated vendors. What serviced do nearby property potential buyers provide? Commercial house buyers offer to purchase your house fast which means that you are able to get on with your own life. Everybody else understands that life is not always uncomplicated and realestate is not necessarily simple. Sometimes a huge advantage like a house can develop into a large responsibility. Local residence buyers focus on buying domiciles from those who should promote their home quickly.

Why is it that local land potential purchasers exist? They exist because actual Estate is not always that simple to liquidate. At a gradual market like we're in today, selling a house may be long-drawn-out approach. Typically, the more your house selling process the longer funds it would cost you to sell your residence. Property purchasers exist to fix your residence advertising demand. They will provide you with a free deal for the property, of course, when you accept, you're able to proceed with your own life.

Can you trust a local land buyer? Together with the latest downturn in the real estate market on the other side of the nation, you can find increased folks entering your home buying profession. As with any changing economy, there Are also terrible individuals operating cons to take advantage of property owners. That said stated the considerate, expert, neighborhood property buyers that you're able to expect exist inside the nearby location.

Ways to Acquire Help to Boost You Your House Rapid

You have noticed we buy houses hints or heard their own Advertisements on radio stations. Even in a hard real estate industry, they are spreading their message. But who are these persons and how will they always be able to get properties? Where would they get the capital? What do they perform with all those houses? Let us lookat

To begin with , they are investors and investors wish to create dollars. As they have been around for a little while today, even in demanding economic times, their organization version is working to them. They've been making money.

When they approach a homeowner, who is contemplating selling Their property, there is going to soon be https://diamondequity.com/ sure things that are in their demonstration. Here is what You May expect: We will cover dollars. We'll settle immediately. There will be no Fees or commissions to be paid out into some true estate agent. They will inquire how much you owe the residence in pools and additional exemptions.

We will have no contingencies for virtually almost any inspections. We will buy your home in its as is a state. You won't will need to do some repairs. They will walk round and throughout your house performing an apparent evaluation of its problem. Although, they will buy your house as is, they will still find out the things they see wrong with your house. They will cause you to be an offer and they will possess the paper work all set. So far it seems just like a especially excellent path to take. It's a hassle-free way to sell your house. Indeed, in some cases, it's an expedient and beneficial way of a house owner to sell his their house. But this really is not always true. Let us take a close glance.

When you go to the settlement desk, you will get money, Even if it's the case that the buyer is getting a loan to obtain your house. The only way which you aren't going to get funds is if you fund yourself, and this is rarely the case. After the customer is getting a loan, they should reveal a preapproval letter plus so they ought to reveal financing commitment letter from their creditor. When this happens, it's like the buyer having money. Whenever somebody is spending money, then you ought to stick to similar measures compared to that of the buyer by means of a loan. To begin with, they should provide evidence that they will have the income and secondly, they should really be willing before settlement to put it within an escrow accounts, that may stipulate, which the intention behind the money is to buying the house. They is going to soon be unwilling to do thisparticular.

A speedy settlement 15 times. Should they supply a deal which is for a 15-day settlement, and then you should be certain that you may repay that fast. It is much more probable that they will supply a settlement of closer to 60 times. The 2-month settlement date is sensible, however their true reason for achieving so is because they don't need to purchase your house. Should they have money, then then they might easily settle within 2-3 weeks. However, throughout that 2-month stage, they're attempting to come across another customer. If they do find the other buyer, they may sell the house into that Buyer at a value higher than which they are paying for . In this scenario, they would be assigning your contract into some other buyer and also the price difference is to be called an assignment commission. In case each of their prices move just like this, chances are they will never have to produce some cash. However, keep in mind that in some situations a mission isn't allowed, therefore they can undergo using the buy, but generally only if they've some other customer lined to whom they can instantly sell their house. Should they don't have any buyer available to go, then they are going to find reasons to escape from this contract.

They will tell you you will save approximately 7% by not having To pay a real estate broker a commission. Yes, there are some situations where an agent will bill 7 percent to selling your residence and at which it is appropriate, but an average of commissions aren't 7%. They may moderate nearer to 5% and could be lower.

But they will not give you all these economies; but alternatively they are going to ask you to discount the cost tag on the home by 7% as you don't need to pay an agent. So, in the end, your net profit within your house will soon be exactly the same with or with a broker. If you aren't employing a broker, then you definitely have zero one who is searching for the pursuits. You're stopping 7 percent for absolutely no service and no representation.

Just how much you owe on the property should be insignificant into the buyer. He should offer a price is effective because of him personally. If that price is too low to pay what your debt, then you will not accept the offer. The reason for requesting what you borrowed from would be because they may make a deal that is only adequate to pay that sum. In the event the amount that they want to supply will be lesser than what you borrowed from, then they can't make an offer, however they can return to that number. What this does is take the equity which may take your home, which is the difference between what you owe and what your house is worth and also gives it to your buyer. Be careful about contingencies. There is going to be a clause of some type or another that allows them to get out of your agreement.

They will not request you to do any repairs, even however, your house might not desire lots of or some repairs in the first spot. They are not educated, even though they are going to have clever thought about homes because they consider so many. They can appear to learn about dwelling construction, but they're only talking.

Irrespective of what the state of the house, they'll tell You that some thing has to be substituted or isn't up to code. As an example, you may have a 2-year-old roof using 30-year shingles, so and they are going to tell you that the shingles are curling up, therefore they may have to displace it. It's not going to be real, but if you're unfamiliar with just how to appraise a roof, then you might think them. Or you will have windows that are older, that work nice, nevertheless they will indicate that they will need to get changed. Clearly, each one of these things are going to have cost that they will factor into the price that they feature.

When trying to warrant a price, they will use the deficiency of a real estate commission, fixes, which don't have to be achieved, and also corresponding sales costs, which they can provide. Bear in Mind that they do not represent you, however, themselves consequently the comparable sales will likely soon be those that work in their own favor.

#Cash Home Buyers