#i havent been sleeping well and

[mschismosa]

muah ❤️

#i could only manage a warm up today #dgs spoilers #i have so many sketches i wanna finish #i gotta sleep tho i havent been sleeping well bleh #maybe tomorrow #dgs #asoryuri #asoryuu #ryunosuke naruhodo #kazuma asougi #mschismosa

[sunshades]

did you let me die in your arms in the timeloop?

did you let me die in your arms in the timeloop?

did you let me die in your arms in the timeloop?

> did you let me die in your arms in the timeloop?

#zero escape #999 #999 spoilers #akane kurashiki #junpei 999 #junepei #HI. HELLO EVEN #ik i messed up some colors i havent been sleeping well. so now we get nb flag june #shades art

[velvetvein]

Baby the stars shine bright, little red riding hood applique skirt (2006)

The skirt doesn't actually feature the applique of red riding hood's portrait, so I'll still be on the hunt for the cardigan~

#please excuse the dog hair already all over it 🤨 #i also havent washed it yet i recieved it recently! #i adore this series and its been on my dream list for years. #egl community #baby the stars shine bright #i have the sleeping beauty skirt as well ill photograph at some point

[mymp3]

#persona 3 #art.mymp3 #Mochizuki Monday #late mochizuki monday posting but uh have a doodle #very loose. not much to it but its a comic #i was thinking of a sad and desperate ryoji and how hed want to be by minatos side despite the fact they dont know each other too well yet #life's been super rough recently and i havent been able to draw too much but uh. yeah. #idk if im gonna maintag this #sleep well anyone whos reading this #hope yall have a wonderful night and an even better day

[r-aindr0p]

Head full of thoughts, amen

#twisted wonderland #rollo flamme #twst rollo #hhhehehehehdhdhudfjhjfdhjvhjdfjhf #did I skip finishing drawings that have a deadline and draw rollo instead well… #yes absolutely #in fact I havent even started the drawings I should have been working on #But the urge #the Rollo #bonjour monsieur *tips hat* #I should go to sleep its 2 a.m again

[cluedoenthusiast]

One of those cat videos

#the soundtrack for richard ayoades new book is genuinely one of my favourite things hes done it fills me so much joy #with* #i wish it were longer #i havent been sleeping well #alex turner #arctic monkeys #catlex purner? #autism #hes just stimming

[baeshijima]

it is now officially the 25th which means...

merry christmas everyone !!! regardless of whether u celebrate or not, i hope u all have a lovely day with whoever u spend it with or with urself <33

#sophie's idle chatter #this is scheduled so im HOPING it posts at 12 am.... prays.... #i havent been super active in the past month or two bc life is kicking my ass (<- has said this countless times already but its still true) #also !! i see asks and ill try and answer them when i actually have the time and energy 😭 ik i say this a lot but ive been drained good god #(not so) mini life updates : #the new lovebrush chronicles main story update has made me weep so much... ive done both clarence and ayns routes and.... #my god.... this story is darker and honestly im loving it AND i love how they did the chara roles in this world (alkaid... ourgh...) #my tear glands arent tho bc ayn ending 3.... what the fuck was that i couldnt sleep after doing that ending??? ITS WAS SO SAD AND FOR WHATF #currently having to wait until the 27th so i can do lars route 😔 #the recent ep of apothecary diaries.... ourgh my heart.... jinshi and maomao beloveds :(( #oh !! and ive gotten back into my ace of diamonds/daiya no ace phase and have been rewatching the series... #sobbing chris and yuki and miyuki my beloveds.... kissing ur foreheads and holding u gently..... #the way i got back into it bc im catching up on s2 of a clean sweep (a korean baseball variety show that i love with all my heart ;w;) #my mum is a traitor tho bc she watched every new ep that came out on tuesdays while i was in uni 🧍‍♀️ so now im catching up on the 30 eps #on my own 🧍‍♀️ #OMG AND ALSO DR STONE S3??? WHY WAS I NOT NOTIFIED THAT PART 1 CAME OUT MONTHS AGO AND PART 2 WAS MORE RECENT??? #i havent been doing that much writing recently tho bc the fingers wont type but the brain is exploding with ideas i cannot handle this #i do want to get back to the haitham sxf series tho.... and also my oc various x reader series....... #tbh ive been contemplating abt publishing the haitham series on ao3 once i write more chapters before publishing them #idk i feel like the series would be nice to have on ao3 as well as tumblr JHDG #thats abt it i think? #anywho if u read this far then know i am giving u a warm cookie as a condolence prize for getting through this life dump <33 #ill leave it off here but i hope u all have a lovely day !! mwah mwah merry chrysler everyone 🎄🫶 #queue... ueueue

[napping-sapphic]

While i do very passionately love naps i gotta say perhaps napping from 6pm to 9pm is not my best move in terms of getting to sleep tonight🤔

#i can’t even actually regret it though because the nap slapped that hard #i havent been sleeping well lately #so getting a nice long undisturbed nap in was like actual angels descended to kiss me directly on the lips #plus i just made post nap hot chocolate #like i KNOW i’ll be tired and frustrated not being able to sleep later #but it’s so nice rn #im thriving (limited time only)

[bulkhummus]

i never think ive got the seasonal saddies until i physically cannot will myself to get out of bed in the morning

#its becoming really frustrating lol #i also just havent been sleeping well but thats neither here nor there #like im just so immensely exhausted

[imageingrunge]

this is perhaps the sweetest moment ive ever had with him

#bg3 #and he prefaces this by saying i know you havent been sleeping well but i didnt want to pry aww wait we ARE alike #astarion hits different as the dark urge #i never knew he was like this #thank you for pulling me back from the abyss babe #bg3 Rhenawedd #bg3 spoilers

[crescentfool]

recently, i’ve been thinking about what a 100% social link/confidant run is like from the perspective of the persona protagonists, rather than the player. i’ve always been a sucker for thinking about the type of narrative created by a person’s gameplay choices (it can be so fun and deep) so!! i wrote this analysis / musing.

some notes before we start: this was written with the lens of persona 3 being the most recent game i played- but the concepts are applicable to the p4/p5 protagonists as well! no spoilers for any of the games are mentioned; this is moreso a general discussion of ludonarrative dissonance with the game mechanics and narrative and how it makes for fun angst (ft. personal interpretation).

(more under the cut!)

the framework: game mechanics

in all of the games, the social link system’s existence coincides with the social stats mechanic. certain social links require a specific set of stats in order to initiate it, or surpass a certain rank. each game has around 20 of these- each of which represent the major arcana (+ some bonuses, e.g. aeon / jester / faith / councilor).

for any players going for a 100% social link run, this basically requires each social stat to be maxed out. anyone who’s followed a guide for a 100% run would know that the beginning of the game tends to be very “strict” with how time can be used, most of which involves getting the stats raised  as soon as possible.

outside of characterization and worldbuilding, completing social links are incentivized for a variety of gameplay reasons. so how could this completionist play style affect the protagonists?

prioritizing social stats over everything else: a general view

regardless of which protagonist you want to put under a petri dish, with a 100% run, you’re essentially asking the protagonist to form amicable bonds with 20 or so people, give or take. granted, not everyone becomes adjoined to the hip to the protagonist.

personally, i feel that forming 20 different bonds over the course of a year would be rather strenuous. during these 100% runs, the protagonists may feel that they’re spreading themselves thin trying to dedicate their resources to multiple different people as well as raising their “social stats.” i find the implications that this has on said bonds is so, utterly fascinating.

while this isn’t reflected in the game and would be better represented within a fic, i find it difficult to believe that this type of behavior doesn’t have any ramifications on the quality of the protagonist’s closer relationships (or their self-image, for that matter).

just… imagine calling one of your close friends but then they consistently give responses along the lines of “lmao sorry i’m busy doing other things,” and they rarely make the time of day for you. how would you feel? gameplay-wise, this deterioration of the relationship is best represented in persona 3 with social links reversing if you haven’t spent time with them in awhile.

part of my fascination with this concept is influenced by my own experiences. trying to maintain so many relationships can be difficult to keep up with and it quickly gets overwhelming (see dunbar’s number for more information). jumping between so many people also makes it difficult to focus on a few relationships meaningfully- meaning that relationships may be limited to being simple pleasantries. even then, ‘successfully’ keeping every relationship satisfying comes at the cost of being unable to pursue your own development and interests.

overall, i think that trying to do so many things ends up lowering the quality of the relationship(s) involved, especially when you also consider the fatigue from going to school as well as fighting shadows.

playing the therapist friend / listening role: a general view

another aspect of the 100% run that i think about is how the protagonists rarely open up to other people. a good chunk of SLs follow a storyline of the protagonist acting as a therapist friend/helping the other person through one central issue. some SLs are an exception to this and have a more casual “we’re just hanging out vibe.”

basically, SLs tend to be weighted toward the other character’s growth, moreso than the protagonist’s (which is handled by the main story). that said, the idea of mostly playing a listening role across most of your relationships and not having many that you feel comfortable to speak freely about your own stuff… feels really unbalanced and unhealthy?

i do think that part of the lack of “input” can be attributed to the silent-protagonist approach taken in the games (which is a whole ‘nother topic). but!! i find that each protagonist’s options, while limited, are fun to think about! some of the traits and interpretations i’ve seen for the differing protags, to name a few, include:

being afraid to open up / get attached and keeping people at arm’s distance as a result

needing to be around other people, even if it’s just listening them, to distract from their own struggles / pretend nothing’s wrong with them

enjoying helping others, being a good and careful listener who can provide an appropriate and helpful response

the willingness to prioritize others over themselves; a lack of self-preservation

compulsive people pleasing

at its worst, the lack of “protagonist talking” or equal reciprocation in response could be misinterpreted by the other person as disinterest (like they’re talking to a wall). alternatively- the lack of “personal tidbits” could be taken as, “you don’t trust me enough to be able to open up, huh.” and i just think that seeing this in a fic would be the biggest shitshow ever (and i would read that).

concluding thoughts:

overall, i feel that the protagonists taking a predominantly listening approach to several relationships at once can lead to compassion fatigue and general burnout. the protagonists are rarely at the receiving end of being listened to and/or having their issues worked through… and that’s kind of sad?

while the 100% social link run can provide great power to any persona fusions (and other cool battle abilities + hijinks)... i ultimately think that there’d be a lot of mental strain that would make achieving this much more difficult when you take a narrative-emphasized approach.

i do realize that it is possible to see the general vibe of this post as “100% social link is bad,” but like… there’s something i find really appealing about the messiness of attempting to manage so many relations at once- only to fall short in several of them and attempting to salvage the last bits of their sanity. when you think about the complications of the 100% SL run from the shoes of the protagonist… yeah!! that’s the good shit!

anyways! if anyone knows of any fics with this kinda vibe for the p3/4/5 protags… feel free to drop it in my askbox… i like them all VERY much :3c… and if this raised any food for thought- i’d be equally honored! let the protags go through shit i wanna see their emotions and coping mechanisms damn it! 👏

#persona 3 #persona 4 #persona 5 #yes it is 3am and im posting this. i couldn't sleep so i wanted to write something that i've been thinking abt as of late :x #highly recommend looking up ludonarrative dissonance btw! if ur interested in game storywriting its SOO interesting bc its definitely- #an occurence that happens every now and then in a video game. persona included. like.. when game mechanics tell one story but the narrative #-ends up contradicting that (or some other thing in reality ends up doing that...). does that even make sense?? #i tried to keep this post general to p3/4/5 but if you know me well enough you'll see how my p3 bias has shaped this post. lmao #i also could go on a tangent about how i feel about orpheus telos as a thing w/rt p3 social links BUT I WONT. unless...? #i have more i want to say on the topic (maybe will do so at a later time) but feel free to ask for more specific hcs with the protags? #maybe not p4kun though just bc ive only watched p4 so i havent had the time to let it sit btwn play sessions #anyway bye im just going to let this float in the void while i sleep. have a good day #meta #hc and au nonsense #lizzy speaks

[piplupod]

hiiii i'm looking for new albums to have playing/listen to while i work on art and other stuff, does anyone have any music album recommendations....

i listen to basically everything but lately i've been getting into a lot of alternative pop sort of stuff idk im bad with genres. also a lot of shakey graves but thats neither here nor there, i just think ppl should listen to his stuff LMFAO. i will take whatever u got though :]

#the only genres i do not rly listen to are screamo and heavy metal fdsjkl sorry #i have listened to them fsdjkl my brother loved all that when he was in highschool so he would share his music w me a lot #and i enjoyed some of it !!! its just not what i often enjoy #also theres a weird long covid symptom i have where certain pitches of sounds will cause a stabbing pain in my brain #like i wasn't able to watch markiplier's fn.af videos for a while bc just his regular voice was . triggering this pain for some reason #not even mentioning the yells and the animatronic jumpscare screech sound effects fhsdgjkl #it comes and goes now but rn its really bad. i wonder maybe if it gets worse if i havent been sleeping well 🤔 #anyways. anything in the heavy metal genres generally triggers that pain so i have to avoid it altogether now RIP #pippen needs 2nd breakfast #okay im posting this finally oh my god why am i so scared all the time. god. i have been drafting a post like this for like.... a week. #keep deleting or saving to drafts bc i get inexplicably scared of asking. what is WRONG WITH MEEEE

[coffee-bat]

i bought beer today

#my ass hasnt been able to sleep for weeks bc of the shittyass meds #i come home. i cant sleep. i casually ask mom if i can get a beer from the fridge. #'no. you cant have any for a week' #'why' #'so we know youre not an addict' #'but i havent drank in 2 weeks and only want one so i can sleep' #'well then you can survive another week :)' #fuck off im so fucking tired of staying up until 4 am #i snuck some in in my backpack today. we're SLEEPING today boys!!! #ramble #personal #alcohol cw

[fereldanwench]

its been a struggle sunday for sure today

#idk why the anxiety is bad today #had a really good weekend otherwise #got out and did things yesterday #made good progress on the apt #get to wfh all week #just rly overstimulated and djfghfdk;gdf rn #think im gonna go take a really steamy shower and get some tea #get into bed early #i havent been sleeping that well could be that #t: wench.txt

[cherry-shipping]

IM HAVING. TRTABLES. im having troubles because my mental health has been SOOOOOO much worse lately and i dont even really have the energy to think of my f/os and its driving me insane......... posting this on here not only bcuz its f/o related but also cuz i dont want any personal stuff on my main but Erm. does anyone have any tips on what 2 do in a situation like this........ when i try to have one of my regular daydreaming sessions or whatever i lose focus immediately so even the most basic of things (thinking abut f/os) isnt really helping at all........ tghrows up everywhere

#ive been so sleepy lately i havent been posting much on my main..... #and my brain is like. you have to POST you have to TALK or theyll all LEAVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU like ok..?? hello................ #i dunno but anyways. rsd and various abandonment issues r killing me rn and i wish my f/os could help #but its hard when you dont even have enough energy to pick up your phone or lift your arm or blink or eat or sleep or THINK #so like. well i guess i was just wondering if anyone had any tips on how 2 deal with that i guess #if not ill just keep kissing my sans stuffie while crying like a little BABYYYYYYYY #cherry chats

[elegyofthemoon]

IF YOU COULD be at any airport in the world rn which one

the bangkok one i wanna go home but also to look at this cool statue :)

#I DONT REMEMBER WHAT THE STORY IS BEHIND THIS STATUE THOUGH :( #my mom always explains it to me but by the time we arrive there im hella sleep deprived because i dont sleep on the plane #theres also a bunch of giant statues around the airport too to welcome arrivals ^7^ those are cool (i mean intimidating BUT COOL) #something something mixing a sea of milk #i dont remember T_ T #answered #anons #(i dont really remember any airports well because im usually spaced tf out at them laksdjafh) #anyways i havent been to thailand in so long :( like 4/5 years #i was supposed to go sooner but then i had covid and that makes me sad :( #AND I HAD PLANS TOO :((( I WAS LIKE BEGGING MY MOM CAN WE GO TO THE ANCIENT CITY PLEAAAASE and then my ass got sick #*angry punching* #my mom and sisters didnt even wind up going to the city either because my sisters were like 'BUT THATS BORING THATS ALL HISTORY #I WANNA GO SHOPPING' #T _ T i need friends who are also into historical stuff. we can make an adventure team and go travel everywhere together (the dream life) #i say im into history but i have no brain to remember anything btw so dont ask me anything asljkfaslkjh #sorry i seem to be >_> chatty today (procrastinating)