#i have few but i wouldnt trade them for the world

[heyiwrotesomethings]

HELLO HOPE UR HAVING A NICE DAY! i would like to request a shinobu x fem!reader(she/her) :) ok so, this is when shinobu is in her past personality and kanae is still alive, reader has a crush on the grumpy shinobu and tries to court her but, shinobu denies all of the reader’s confessions because shes scared to be in a relationship considering the world theyre in. (obv reader doesnt give up but i wouldnt either) fast travel to kanaes death and reader tries to cheer shinobu up but suddenly shinobu just snaps at the reader (due to stress and overwhelmness) and tells reader to leave her alone for good and reader does just that. reader stops with trying to court shinobu and shinobu will lowkey miss the readers shenanigans and shinobu deeply regrets yelling at reader, so shinobu goes to reader and apologizes and they live happily ever after! I HOPE THAT WASNT TOO COMPLICATED! I TRIED TO MAKE IT SIMPLE BUT MY BRAIN IS IMAGINING SO MUCH AND I HAD RO GET THIS ONE OUT 😍 I LOVE ALL OF YOUR FICS AND YOUVE BEEN MY FAV SHINOBU WRITER IN TUMBLR! HAVE A NICE DAY/NIGHT -⭐️

A Trade of Equal Value

Shinobu Kochou x She/Her Reader

A/N: I had a pretty good time writing this one (even if I was still working on it at 2am last night lol)! The timeline is also kinda scuffed because I didn’t want to write in the four years between Kanae’s death and where Shinobu is mentally by the time Tanjirou and Co come around, but I still imagine her at the same age she is when the boys are introduced. I also got pretty angsty with Kanae’s death and Shinobu lashing out, but as usual, it turns out alright in the end.I feel like I should also note that Shinobu has a panic attack which I have bracketed with ‘~~~’. Shinobu even gets a little Gomez Addams-y at the end which I think is pretty nice if I do say so myself. Thanks for the request, I hope you like the result! Word Count: 4,906

“Shinobu, wait up!”

Shinobu exhaled audibly and Kanae giggled beside her, hooking her arm with Shinobu’s so that she couldn’t escape the other demon slayer quickly catching up to them.

“Be nice,” Kanae advised her.

“I’m plenty nice.” Shinobu whispered defensively. She enjoyed (Y/n)’s company more than most of the other people she had to deal with on a daily basis, but she was just getting back from a mission that lasted all night and she was too tired to cater to whatever scheme (Y/n) was cooking up this time.

“Shinobu!” (Y/n) caught up to the sisters and hugged Shinobu from behind, “And hello to you too, Kanae-san!”

“Hello, (Y/n)-chan, how was your night?” Kanae asked, nearly smirking as her rosy-cheeked sister attempted to free herself from (Y/n)’s embrace. (Y/n) showed Shinobu mercy by letting her go and walking at her side instead.

“Pretty quiet. Everything went alright on your end?”

“Just fine.” Kanae confirmed.

“Good! So, um, Shinobu,”

Oh gods, here she goes again… Shinobu braced herself.

“There is a street festival going on in downtown Tokyo tomorrow. Want to go check it out with me? As a date? Or not… whatever you are more comfortable with.”

“What a fun idea!” Kanae spoke on Shinobu’s behalf, “She’ll be happy to go with you!”

“Neesan!” Shinobu objected.

“Am I wrong?” Kanae pouted, “would you not like to spend time with (Y/n)? Should I maybe go with her instead? I wouldn’t mind getting out for the day.”

Shinobu turned her head so (Y/n) couldn’t see her face and scowled at Kanae. Never let it be said that Kanae couldn’t be as conniving as she was kind.

Shinobu had met (Y/n) during Final Selection. They had spent most of that hellish week together, quickly forming a rapport that continued even after they made it out of the wisteria forest. They went on missions together often and spent a lot of off time together too.

They grew very close, close enough that Shinobu’s mood would sour when (Y/n) wasn’t around. Close enough that Kanae felt the need to tease her about how close they walked together in the halls. Close enough that (Y/n) had confessed to Shinobu a few weeks ago and was now trying yet another courting attempt.

Shinobu enjoyed spending time with (Y/n), but if they became any closer than they already were and (Y/n) went out for a mission and never came back, Shinobu was afraid of where that would leave her. It was hard enough to lose people she had met in passing, friends, family… she didn’t want to know what it was like to lose a romantic partner too. She had already witnessed such a thing a few months back.

There was a fiancée of one slayer Shinobu had known in passing since she was a Kakushi. She had been sent to clean up a location before another demon was discovered in the area. Woefully ill-equipped to deal with the situation, she had lost her life.

When the slayer who was her betrothed had received the news, he deteriorated over the next three weeks before finally passing away in his bed at the Butterfly Estate. Shinobu had fumed over the loss.

“There was nothing wrong with him!” She had exclaimed heatedly, angry at the situation. She had been unable to find anything physically wrong with the young man in all the tests she had done.

Kanae smiled sympathetically and put her hands on Shinobu’s shoulders as they watched the Kakushi remove the covered body from the infirmary.

“Sometimes there is just no curing a broken heart,” She had replied.

“I’ll go.” Shinobu gave Kanae a warning glare when her lips split into a larger smile, then she turned back to (Y/n), making the girl jump at the intensity of her stare, “But it is not a date.”

(Y/n) closed her eyes briefly and exhaled softly through her nose before giving Shinobu a small shrug and a relaxed smile, “Understood.”

That’s how it always went. (Y/n) sweetly telling Shinobu she loved her with little gifts and proposed outings with intentions clear. It became as normal a part of their relationship as anything else they did together.

Time and time again, Shinobu would deny her, but always kept her close. She would never admit it, never give herself a moment to reflect on it, but every time (Y/n) expressed her interest in courting her, although Shinobu denied her at every turn, she always felt a sense of relief that (Y/n) was still interested in her.

There had been a few occasions where (Y/n) had gotten friendly with other people and put Shinobu on edge. These instances made her feel jealous and more irritable than what was common for the younger of the Kochou sisters, but (Y/n) always came back to her in the end, even if Shinobu had to do a little prodding behind the scenes.

Kanae had noticed one such occasion and gently scolded Shinobu for it.

“If you are not intending to pursue a courtship with (Y/n), you really mustn’t sabotage the potential for her to find someone who wants to do what you will not. That wouldn’t be fair. Don’t keep her heart if you are not going to share yours in return. Regardless of what you decide, you must treat (Y/n) well. Friend or lover. Do you understand, Shinobu?”

To be lectured by Kanae was truly humbling and even embarrassing to an extent. If Kanae actually scolded someone, one would assume they must have really deserved it. Which is why Shinobu grunted a quick, “yes”, with her eyes cast shamefully to the floor before all but stomping away.

So maybe she had gone a bit overboard interfering with (Y/n)’s sparring partner’s recovery training schedule, but in her defense, (Y/n) was her partner first. Even if she had been okay with back to back sessions, Shinobu didn’t want anything less than (Y/n)’s best when they sparred so that meant nameless-sparkly-eyed-touchy-slayer had to find something else to occupy their time.

Turning the corner after exiting Kanae’s room, she found (Y/n) waiting for her. Leaning against the wall with a couple of wooden swords in her hands, she offered one to Shinobu with a inquisitive look.

“Want to let off some steam?” She asked.

“Yeah,” Shinobu managed a small grin at the offer, taking the sword and ignoring the tingles that traveled through her body when their hands touched.

This was what she wanted, the same steadfast compatibility they had when they met in the forest. Nothing scary, just them in their most pure and uncomplicated form. Was that so wrong? Kanae shouldn’t judge Shinobu for wanting this… the only opinions that mattered in this instance were her own and (Y/n)’s, and perhaps that was true to an extent, but Kanae’s wisdom about treating (Y/n)’s heart with care should not have been so easily pushed to the back of Shinobu’s mind… because it would be the last time such advice left Kanae’s lips.

The preparations for Kanae’s funeral had simultaneously happened agonizingly slow and all too fast. The most time Shinobu had to process her sister’s death was probably in those moments holding her beaten and bloodied body waiting for the Kakushi to collect her from the battlefield. She had held her long enough to notice how her skin had gone cold as the sunrise broke over the hills much too late to save the Hashira from her unforgiving fate. The emptiness she felt when the Kakushi finally arrived and gently took Kanae’s weight off of her almost felt worse than the initial death.

But there was no time to dwell on that. There was work to do. Cremation, service, paperwork, becoming the head of the mansion and taking on all of the duties that entailed. Meetings with Oyakata-sama himself and his condolences and hopes for her moving forward. She had already been close to becoming eligible for a Hashira position herself, but she hadn’t thought she would soon be replacing her sister instead of sitting beside her.

~~~

When she could finally be alone, Shinobu collapsed onto the tatami floor of her bedroom and wept, Kanae’s haori tightly wound within her grasp. What would she do? What would she do without her? Her sister, who loved and understood her more than any other, gone with one last, rattling breath that even now echoed within Shinobu’s ears. Her own breathing now was too shallow, her eyes stung and she couldn’t see. Her stomach felt cold and heart twisted so viscously in her chest that she felt physically ill.

Hands suddenly wrapped around her biceps and she tried to pull away, still struggling to breathe. The hands left for but a moment before they returned, fingers touching more cautiously than before. Slowly running up and down her arms to her hands and then back up to shoulders and the back of her neck, continuing the motion repeatedly.

Over time, the static in her ears dissipated and she was able to hear a soft voice, urging her to breath. She suddenly felt so exhausted that she couldn’t keep herself upright and fell forward, but instead of the floor, forehead fell against something more solid, but not hard. The arms wrapped around her and the voice continued to coax her to breathe, now gently swaying her from side to side.

~~~

Shinobu had no idea how much time had passed when she finally had the strength to pull away, seeing (Y/n) looking over her with worry. It made her feel so small and powerless and… and angry.

“Why,” Shinobu rasped sharply, “are you here?”

(Y/n) flinched backward at Shinobu’s tone, swallowing a lump in the back of her throat before answering.

“With everything that happened, I was worried about you. I could hear you from the hall, you scared me.”

“So?” Shinobu spat, trying to get up, but her legs weren’t cooperating. (Y/n) reached forward to help her, “Don’t.” Shinobu quickly rebuffed.

(Y/n)’s hands returned to her lap, tightly clasped. “I’m sorry. I’ve never seen you like this before. Please, tell me how I can help.”

“I don’t want your help.” Shinobu growled. “Why, why can’t you just leave me alone? You just can’t take no for an answer, can you?” Shinobu wasn’t yelling, but the harshness of her tone was just as sharp in (Y/n)’s ears. “Help me,” She scoffed, though it sounded more like a whimper in her ears, making her more angry, “unless you can bring the dead back to life, stay the hell away from me.”

“Shinobu, please—“

Shinobu was so full of rage and anguish, her misdirected anger only became more pointed. The lack of control was eating at her, she felt like she was lost on treacherous seas, trying to stay afloat by dragging (Y/n) under the churning black water so that she could maybe get just one full breath without swallowing the salty brine. It would be so easy. The one thing that she could control.

“This isn’t something you can fix! This isn’t a fairy tale where you get the girl by saying a few sappy half-baked sentiments. How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t want you?”

The words struck (Y/n) deeply, but she tried to power through, “That’s not why I’m here, Shinobu. I swear I’m not expecting anything to change. You’re hurting, and as your friend I—“

“You aren’t my friend!” Shinobu shouted. “Time and time again you ask to court me. Time and time again I refuse you. Your narcissism knows no bounds... The kindness you are attempting to show me is a forgery! A means to the end you keep badgering me for! You are reprehensible, a thorn wedged in my side, I can’t stand you, can’t you see that?! Leave!”

Shinobu’s heavy breathing was deafening in the quiet left behind by her words. Glaring down at (Y/n), she felt no lighter. No weight had been lifted off of her shoulders. In fact, as the sound of silence grew, the air around them only seemed to become thicker.

After stewing in the silence, (Y/n) attempted to speak. Her voice cracked on the first word and with it, Shinobu’s heart. She slowly got to her feet as if she had been physically beaten, avoiding Shinobu’s eyes as she turned away to wipe at her own.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered through a hitched sob that made Shinobu’s blood chill, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know you felt like that.”

Tell her you don’t. Take it all back, hurry. Try to make it better. Don’t let her slip away too. A hurried whisper within Shinobu’s mind pleaded, but she found herself mute, still and rigid as a statue. Her mind was fuzzy, yet somehow working in overdrive, but she appeared to not have the means to do anything about it.

“I never wanted you to feel uncomfortable. It was hard enough asking the first time, I wouldn’t have asked again if Kanae-san,” another choked sob, “if she hadn’t encourage me to keep trying, if she hadn’t sounded so sure that you felt the same, I wouldn’t have bothered you after that...

Even so, I should have noticed how you really felt. I didn’t pay close enough attention, yet I still claimed to love you. I really am the worst, huh?”

Shinobu could see the terrible false smile (Y/n) wore as she slowly slid the door open and shuffled into the hall. The voice in Shinobu’s head screamed at her to move, to speak, to stop (Y/n) from slipping out of the room completely, but she still stood stubbornly frozen.

“I’m sorry, I’ll leave you alone. I promise.”

The door closed, furthering the chasm between them and casting Shinobu’s room in darkness once more. She could hear (Y/n)’s footsteps fading, but instead of following, she slid back down to the floor in a strange state between wakefulness and unconsciousness. Not quite grasping the gravity of this event until much later when the other girls finally had her eating and sleeping properly again and she had some time to reflect.

(Y/n) had made good on her promise to leave Shinobu alone. When Shinobu had worked up the courage to find her and apologize for all the awful things she said nearly a month ago, the room that was all but officially (Y/n)’s was uniform with the other empty rooms spread across the mansion.

Kiyo had found her standing in the doorway and timidly approached.

“(Y/n)-san told us that she was going to ask the Stone Hashira if he was willing to take on another Tsuguko. Her crow sent us a letter a couple days later. She was accepted. The Kakushi helped relocate her belongings.”

“Oh.” Shinobu softly exclaimed, because what else could she say? It was either that or sink to the floor like a slug and Shinobu wasn’t quite ready to go that route yet.

“But now that you know, you could go talk to her. If you wanted to.” Kiyo cautiously added. She and the other girls may or may not have caught wind of what had happened, but were too nervous to try to interfere before now.

“Thank you, Kiyo. I think I will do just that.”

***

“Himejima-san, please.”

Shinobu couldn’t believe that Gyomei of all people was getting in her way of speaking to (Y/n). The man who had saved her and introduced her to a cultivator had been a father figure to her for years now and to have him standing in her way like he was now stung.

“It is not my decision to make,” Gyomei shook his head, still standing firm, “She does not wish to see you. Why that is, I do not know, but it is the decision she has made and one that I must honor.”

“I need to see her, it’s urgent.” She insisted.

“Is her health failing?”

“No.”

“Does she have a mission?”

“…No.”

“Then I see no reason to yield, young Kochou.” Gyomei shook his head woefully, “But I can tell this is important to you, if you have a message for her, I shall relay it for you if you are comfortable.”

Shinobu stared past Gyomei, looking longingly at the towering fence that enclosed his estate. She honed in on the sound of slayers training beyond the walls, hoping to hear (Y/n)’s voice among the shouts and grunts and clacking practice swords, but heard no such sound in the commotion.

“Can I write it out myself?” She asked Gyomei. He nodded.

“I will allow it… Again, I don’t know what this is about, but take time and care in writing what you want to say. You can send En by when you’ve completed your letter or hand it off to myself.”

“Very well. I shall do that.” With one last look at the tall fence, Shinobu turned to leave and Gyomei spoke up once more.

“Do not get disheartened if you do not get the results you hope for right away. Find a happy medium between patience and persistence and perhaps she will come around.”

“I’ll keep it in mind. Thank you.”

As soon as Shinobu got home, she locked herself in her office for hours and every attempted draft of apology could not even begin to touch on all she regretted. Her waste bin was overflowing by the time she had something that didn’t immediately make her want to rip the offending paper in two. Before she could change her mind, she sent En off with the letter and waited anxiously for a reply. Hoping beyond hope they could go back to where they were before. Shinobu needed that familiarity and stability. She craved it. Fortunately, she didn’t have to wait terribly long for a reply, but unfortunately it read,

I’m relieved to hear you are in a better place, but just as you have had time to reflect on that night, I have as well.

Your words that night hurt me in a way that I’ve never been hurt before, made worse by the fact that it was you who had said them to me.

Part of me wanted to be furious with you, I thought that I should be, but I wasn’t. I was empathetic to your loss and the new responsibilities that were thrust upon you. But even though I tried to convince myself that you lashed out because of the pressure, I believe there was some truth in what you had said.

If I could go back in time, I would have just kept my feelings to myself to spare us all the trouble. Despite this, I am happy that you hope to patch things up between us.

However, in my reflection, I came to the conclusion that even after all of this, I am still hopelessly in love with you despite everything. In the interest of preserving my heart, and saving you from the discomfort of my affections, I do not think it wise for us to reconnect. At least, not until I manage to get over you. I don’t know how long that will take, but given that not a waking hour passes that I don’t think about you, it probably won’t be any time soon.

I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable to read this, I’m just trying to be honest. Tell the girls I said hi, and please take care of yourself.

Wishing you the best,

(Y/n)

“Wishing you the best?” Shinobu hissed under her breath, the paper crinkling between the harsh pinching of her fingertips. “There is no best of me without you, idiot.”

Shinobu allowed herself time to cry, but not a lot. Gyomei’s words were still on her mind. If she wanted (Y/n) back, she wasn’t going to get her by crying, but now she needed to make a very important choice.

Continue to push for friendship, or confront the romantic feelings that she had fought like hell to keep hidden. Was accepting those feelings and the vulnerability the would bring worse than not having (Y/n) in her life at all?

“Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” Shinobu softly pondered the old proverb. Kanae had been a fan of the saying and Shinobu had never really understood the sentiment until now.

Though she was going to fight like hell to be worthy of the love she had lost and reclaim it once more.

***

“Another letter? En, that’s three just today. You don’t have to bend to her every whim.” (Y/n) fussed over the bird, setting her up with fresh water and seed.

“It is important to Shinobu, so it is important to me.” The loyal crow proudly stated, though she was very grateful for (Y/n)’s continued hospitality.

“Just try not to over do it.” (Y/n) sighed and unfurled the letter, quickly catching the pressed flowers within and quietly cursing as bits of the brittle plants flaked off and fell to the floor. She carefully paced the dried flowers on her desk and scanned over the letter, finding it to be another poem. “What is she trying to achieve here? Why is she doing this?”

“To win back your trust, your heart,” En cocked her head left and then right, “Is it not obvious? Should I suggest being more direct?”

“Why does she want my heart so badly all of the sudden?” A bit of irritation slipping into her tone, “Is it something she wants to seal up in a jar? Bet she’d enjoying having it up on a shelf in the lab. Maybe a paper weight on her desk.”

“You humans vex me,” En’s feathers ruffled, “just give each other something shiny and make up.”

“If only it were that simple.” (Y/n) murmured, finishing her curt response to Shinobu’s poem, denying her a visit once again. She then placed the letter beside En. “You can take your time heading back, and if she tries to insist on a fourth delivery today, turn her down for the good of your health.”

En released a low caw that could only be interpreted as a scoff. Promptly scooping up the letter and taking her leave, passing Gyomei in the hallway.

“(Y/n), is all well? You are late for training.”

(Y/n) winced, “I’m so sorry Master. I got distracted.”

“Kochou-san again?”

“Yes…”

“And you still will not see her?” (Y/n)’s silence was answer enough. “Why?”

“I guess when it comes right down to it, I’m scared. Whether it’s me putting my own heart out there, or her actively trying to obtain it, I feel like it will inevitably end the same and I don’t think I could go through that again.”

Gyomei hummed thoughtfully, “I think I understand your concerns. Matters of the heart are certainly not easy. Especially when it has already been hurt before. I’m sure you will make your peace with her soon, but I pray that peace and satisfaction will find you sooner.”

“Thank you, Master.”

“Can I expect you to join the rest of your peers for training now?”

“Of course!”

“Wonderful. I expect you to have two boulders beaten down to gravel by nightfall.”

(Y/n)’s shoulders slumped and she suppressed a groan.

“Yes, sir.”

This would be a long day…

***

Shinobu halfheartedly paged through the new medicinal tome that had arrived the day prior. She had been eagerly anticipating its arrival for months, but now with En’s latest return proving she had failed to entice (Y/n) once again, she hardly had the motivation.

She was surprised when Gyomei’s crow, Zekka, came to perch at her window some hours later. She took the letter from his beak and he quickly flew off. He was not expecting a reply, she supposed. She unfurled the textured paper and scanned the punched message which simply read,

The best way to receive what it is you are looking for, is to give something of equal value in return.

Himejima Gyomei

“Really, Himejima-san, is this supposed to be a riddle?” Shinobu shook her head, but a determined spark lit up her eyes and she got to work.

***

(Y/n) slumped to the ground, uncaring that she was resting in a pile of rubble. She had destroyed the boulders just as the sun had sank behind the mountains, but at what cost? Himejima seemed nice, but his training was beyond brutal. If the secret of Stone Breathing was to make one’s arms as heavy and stiff as stone, (Y/n) was surely going to be a Master in no time. Her eyes drooped shut. It wouldn’t be the first time she took a dirt nap after training, but an insistent voice was preventing that.

“Hello, hello, please don’t fall asleep out here, (Y/n). I could probably name ten different reasons why it would be a horrible decision.”

Cold hands prodded at her face and sore arms, making her groan in protest and try to shimmy away.

“If you don’t massage and stretch now, you are going to be completely immobile tomorrow. Which may be helpful actually, at least then you won’t be able to run away from me.”

(Y/n) heard her arm crack and pop, which would have have alarming except it felt like a relief. She cracked opened her eyes, soon blown wide open when she realized who was busy cracking and rotating her aching wrist. If her heart had ever raced when she saw Shinobu (which it did) it was sprinting now. Damn traitorous organ never learned.

“What are you doing here? How are you here?” She whispered, not even because she was pretty sure she was dehydrated, but because it just felt appropriate to whisper.

“Jumped over the fence.” Shinobu answered casually, taking her time cracking (Y/n)’s knuckles and massaging her palm now, “Though I’m sure Himejima-san is well aware of my presence and wouldn’t have minded me using the front gate this time around. And for your first question, I’m here for you.”

“Shinobu, I told you that I—“

“—I have something I want to give you formally. What you decide to do from there is completely your choice. I know I have always asked a lot of you, but please allow me this once more.”

“…Okay.” Even after nearly four months of separation, (Y/n) found herself still unable to deny her. In her mind, this did not bode well for what little progress she thought she had made.

“Thank you.”

Shinobu stoked her thumbs over the palm of (Y/n)’s hand before bringing it to her chest, placing it over her heart and holding it there with both hands.

“Wh-what are you doing?” (Y/n) squeaked, trying to inch her palm higher, somehere above Shinobu’s clavicle and not quite so close to the swell of her chest, but Shinobu held firm.

“Do you feel that?” She asked.

“What am I supposed to be feeling?!”

“My heartbeat, of course. Can’t you feel it? It’s beating rather hard right now.”

It was hard to pay attention to anything other than her own racing heart if she was honest. Besides, a hand to someone’s chest wasn’t the best way to find a pulse. Shinobu of all people should know that.

“Maybe this will help.”

(Y/n) let Shinobu shift their positions around, mostly because she was still stiff and her body was refusing to cooperate with her own wishes. After a bit of maneuvering, she found her cheek resting on Shinobu’s chest instead, a speedy and strong drumbeat pressed against her ear.

“Is that better?” Shinobu asked.

“Why are you doing this?”

“To show you that you are not alone, that this is the power you have over me. My heart is yours, it always has been, but I’m giving it to you formally now.”

“Shinobu, I can’t—“

“I don’t expect you to give yours in return, I know I don’t deserve it yet, but I hope to one day. Will you allow me the honor of courting you. You owe me nothing, but I beg of you to allow me the chance to love you the way you deserve to be loved.”

“Why the change of heart?”

“Because losing out on the moments we could have while living together is more frightening to me than death itself. I don’t know how much time either of us has, but I want to spend it all with you.”

(Y/n)’s breath caught in her throat and her eyes began to water. A quiet sob shook her shoulders and she felt Shinobu’s arms tighten around her. She was so doomed. Try as she might, her heart was very clear. It belonged to Shinobu, no matter what she decided to do. That didn’t mean she couldn’t make her really work for it though.

“Alright, I accept,” (Y/n) sniffed, “you may court me.”

Shinobu gasped softly then took (Y/n)’s hand from her lap, kissing the back of it while locking eyes with her. The intensity of her stare sent a shiver down (Y/n)’s spine.

“I cannot thank you enough for this opportunity. The same one I had denied you of several times in the past. The goddess my heart is devoted to is a merciful one. How unworthy I am of your blessing.”

“I think you have been reading too much poetry.” (Y/n) spoke in a strained whisper, flustered by Shinobu’s intensity. She had never imagined she could be like this.

“Oh this is only the beginning,” Shinobu declared, a purple flame burning in her eyes more vibrantly than any chemical reaction could produce, “You best prepare yourself.”

#demon slayer oneshots #kny oneshots #demon slayer x reader #kny x reader #shinobu x reader #shinobu kocho x reader #shinobu kochou x reader #requests #anonymous

[cupidsblonde]

jj always knew he had a thing for milfs even if they where only a few years older than him.

inspiration: @princessbrunette

the moment jj had laid eyes on you he knew he had to have you. so he had brought it up to his friends one night at the chateau.

“you guys know who this is?” jj asks as he shows an instagram to the group off his phone “uhh jj” pope starts “what” “you know shes like 20 right?” jj’s jaw dropped, but then he perks up again “so whatttt its like a 2-3 year age gap who cares”everyone started laughing.

“bro” jj says slumping in his chair and says after he thought about it again. “jj ur 17 just wait a few months and you’ll be legal” John B says shrugging. Kiera smacks his arm “ow what the hell kie” “you shouldn’t be encouraging this” Pope sighs and lays down on the coach “can we figure out jj’s milf problems in the morning or something?” everyone looks at jj and he’s knocked the fuck out

In the morning, jj wakes up last. he wakes up to pope talking about who he’s dropping groceries off to this morning. jj’s ears perk up when he hears your name. “your dropping off groceries too her and didnt tell me?” “im so coming” popes face drops

“no your so not” John B, Kiera, and Sarah all look at each other and Sarah says “theres no stopping him now Pope, hes going” Sarah says and the three of them laugh

jj slaps popes shoulder and turns him around with his arm slung around his shoulder “thanks buddy” jj does a hop and a skip out the chateau and pope following him out the door

when they get to heywards jj spots something he would be able to spot anywhere, you and your 4 year old that looks just like you. jj keeps walking “jj.. jj what are you doing?!” pope whisper yells at jj but cant stop him as he’s already speaking to you.

“hello ma’am” jj says as he makes his way toward you as he picks up your bags for you. Heyward makes a face but leaves it as you swipe your card and take it back quickly and u pick up your child and catch up with thing VERY hot man who you knew to be as jj maybank.

“hey! jj right?” you ask jj stops in his tracks “you know who i am?” he asks “of course i know you silly! we went to the same school for like our whole lives until, well you know” gesturing down at the 4 year old on your hip. “oh yeah sucks you had to drop out, i wish though” he says

“wasnt really my plan but i wouldnt trade her for the world” you say, when you look up you see your small house just off the beach on the cut. “well this is my stop, thanks for bringing my groceries back i really appreciate it.” jj smiles, “you do know they offer to being the bags to you right?” “yeah i know, i got tripped off my someone that youd be there though” you say smiling.

you walk up onto your porch and notice how jj stops. “well? are you coming?” you ask turning around to smile at him and wave him on into your small house.

“guys!” jj yells coming into the chateau slamming the door open and shut excitedly. “i got a date!” pope laughs “you? with her? your joking right?” “yeah jj, does she know your going to turn 18 in two months and you arent 18?” kiera asks

“ill just have to wait then” jj says “you’ve got to tell her.” “ i will i will, the date is tomorrow night ill tell her then.”

your house wasn’t far from the chateau so, jj walked. on his way he made a stop fir some flowers. when he got there he took a deep breath outside of her door and knocked. on the inside he heard little feet tapping towards the door quickly he saw the knob turning but never all the way but at some point it does all the way and he spots a little girl, your little girl. she looks just like you.

when your girl opens the door jj takes one of the bigger flowers out of the bunch and gives her one. she takes it with her clammy hands and says “thank you!!” in her cute high pitched voice and runs off the show her mom.

you walk over to where they are and invite him inside and he gives you the flowers “they are beautiful thank you” you say walking to the kitchen to get a vase to put them in. “hey just so we dont go anywhere you dont want to, im not 18 just yet” he pauses to take a breath and u look at him nodding.

“im turning 18 in like 2 months and i just wanted you to know.” “thats okay, i just turned 20. its not legal just yet and we can wait.” “really?” jj asks “yeah of course” “well if we can, can we continue this date?”

at the end of the night, you guys just kissed goodnight as, he wasn’t legal yet. but when he did turn 18, you guys made it offical and did more than just kiss goodnight.

#jj maybank fluff #outer banks #x reader #fanfic #jj obx #pope hayward #pope obx #jj maybank #kiara carrera #john b routledge #first writing #first fic #fanfiction

[bridgyrose]

Ruby talking to WBY & ALPN (Jnpr 2.0) about what neo put her through. Focusing on what each fake said and meant

(Had to adjust a lot of this in order to make it not OOC for Ruby, so enjoy Ruby having some ptsd and anxiety over what she tells her friends)

Ruby stared at the tea in front of her, her fingers tensing up as she reached for the cup and relaxing as she finally wrapped them around the handle. While she had managed to get over most of what happened in the Ever After, there were still a few things that bothered her. Nightmares of Penny and Pyrrha reminding her of her failures, the way her body seemed to freeze when she saw a grimm as she silently questioned to herself if she was still ready for this, waiting for the tea to change into a rainbow of colors as she stared at it longer than intended, fingers tapping the cup before taking a quick sniff of the tea, and then a small sip. Her body relaxed as she tasted the familiar taste of chamomile, a small sigh leaving her lips. “Are you sure we should be relaxing like this? We could be trying to help out with the fights that keep breaking out-” 

“You need this, Ruby,” Oscar said, his voice filled with concern. “And we can all see it. You’re not like how you used to be. Always second guessing yourself, putting up a mask of optimism instead of genuinely believing it… we worry about you.” 

Weiss nodded and put a hand on Ruby’s shoulder. “And you still havent told us what happened between you and Neo. Anytime it comes up, you start clamming up and focusing on everything else around you.” 

“I’m fine-” 

“You “killed” yourself in front of us, Rubes,” Yang interrupted. “You looked us in the eyes and fell through the ground after drinking that tea. Please, what happened?” 

Ruby sighed and gently put her teacup down, her fingers shaking as she tapped the handle of her teacup, nails gently clicking against the porcelain. “Neo… brought back everyone I failed, everyone that I thought I could trust. Ozpin, Lionheart, Ironwood, Clover, Penny… Pyrrha.” The last name had come out quietly as she glanced at Jaune, her voice breaking. “She used Roman and the rest of them as a mouthpiece. She voiced her anger at me, reminding me of my failures. How I was too slow to save Pyrrha, that I could’ve trusted Ironwood, that I let Penny die, again! I-I didnt want to fail you again. I… I didnt want to be me.” 

Silence filled the air as everyone took in what Ruby had just told them, and all she could do was stare at her tea, watching as her memories started to take over. The words from each of them, running through her mind, no matter how much she tried to push it away. 

“Who were you to think that you knew best for Atlas?” 

“But I traded my life so my friends could live!” 

“Just like you were too late to save me at the Vytal Festival… I died in Atlas too, didn’t I? Can you imagine what that's like? To be completely and utterly failed... time and again... by someone who meant the world to you…”

“How many more lives do you have to ruin before you realize you’re not cut out to save anyone?!” 

Her arms shook as tears started to well up in her eyes. Months of emotions that she had held back, months of trying to keep herself calm only to watch everything slowly slip away over and over again finally started to hit the breaking point as she felt everything slip for a moment. 

“None of this is your fault, Ruby.” 

Ruby flinched as she felt Jaune’s hand on her shoulder, a tear dropping from her cheek and onto the table as she looked over at him, shaking her head. “I couldnt save Penny, I was too slow to save Pyrrha, Atlas fell because of my plan.” 

“You saved thousands, Ruby,” Oscar said with a smile as he placed his hand on hers. “Atlas may be gone, but her people are here, surviving. I cant say its been easy for any of us, but I can say that without you, the world wouldnt be as united as it is now. Everyone heard your message, and help came. Because of you, we’re in a better spot. Because of you, people have lived and we have a chance to stop Salem.” 

Ruby nodded and looked around at her friends, her family, all of them far from home and even farther from the people she had first met. “What if… what we’re doing isnt enough? What if all we’re doing is delaying Salem? She already has two relics, who’s to say she doesnt have the crown now?” 

“Then we’ll be by your side no matter what!” Nora exclaimed with a grin. 

Blake smiled and sat down next to Ruby. “And we’ll be here for you to lean on, to share this burden so you’re not the only one carrying it.” 

“But what if I’m wrong again?!” Ruby pulled her hand away from Oscar and clutched her head. “Pyrrha sacrificed herself so the rest of us could live, I thought I knew what was best for Atlas and the kingdom fell, everyone I’ve tried to help has died and no matter how many times I try to do things differently, all I do is ruin everything for everyone!” 

Weiss sighed and looked down at her rapier, thumbing the empty revolver. “We all made mistakes and what happened in Atlas didnt have any easy answers. All we can do is move forward. Which means resting and trying giving yourself time to grieve. Time you havent been giving yourself. Besides, you said it yourself, that was Neo trying to get to you. Penny would never think you let her down.” 

Ruby took a breath and wiped the tears from her eyes as she tried to calm herself, her heart still pounding in her chest. “Right… I’ll… I’ll get some rest.” 

“You can trust the rest of us to keep everything under control until you’re ready again.” Oscar stood up and smiled, his eyes flashing green. “And I promise you, Miss Rose, all of us are grateful for what you’ve done. Even if it doesnt feel like it, you’ve done much more to help others than you know.”

#rwby #ruby rose #rwby ruby rose #weiss schnee #blake belladonna #yang xiao long #jaune arc #nora valkyrie #oscar pine #drabbles #angsty drabbles

[ceasarslegion]

So ive been playing skyrim since it came out all the way back in 2011

Obviously, i was a bit younger 13 years ago. And a lot more naive. Didn't know a ton about how the world worked. I didn't even know that I wanted to go into federal work and I barely paid attention in social studies.

Since Skyrim's release day, I moved to 4 different places, most of those cities I also moved to different homes within. I graduated high school, took a few years to gain work and life experience, performed in multiple professional musicals, moved out on my own on the other side of the atlantic where I was the only one I knew on that entire coast, went to uni, started HRT, got involved in street-level activism, graduated uni with a double degree in political science and cinema (and a minor in history!), dealt with my childhood dog dying, nearly died myself of covid, moved again, got a shitty door to door salesman job, quit, got a shitty retail job, quit, got a job in federal security until I can climb the ladder higher, worked a provincial election for the NDP, and met my boyfriend. This is by no means an exhaustive list.

To say that a lot happens in 13 years is a bit of an understatement.

The first time I ever played Skyrim, I joined the stormcloaks. I was a naive kid who didn't know much about politics or the world. I didn't really know much about how all that jargon worked and only saw them as a rebellion against some kind of tyrant. Worked for me.

My recent run I picked up after all these years because I remembered how many hours and years I spent in elder scrolls games. It seemed that no matter how far away I moved or how different everything seemed, I always had either Oblivion or Skyrim to pick up and escape into. I feel a little lost and disoriented in my life now, and needed something familiar and comforting, so I booted it up again.

I got to the quest where you negotiate a ceasefire between the imperials and stormcloaks until the dragons return is dealt with. "Lets make sure we actually have a skyrim left to fight over, yeah?"

The first time I played, I gave the stormcloaks everything. Why wouldnt I? I joined them, after all.

This time was a little... different. I joined the Imperials, and was willing to seceed more territory to the side I wasn't on. Now I have a formal education in politics, and direct experience within it.

If you want Markarth, we need Riften. Winterhold's strategic position isn't a fair enough trade for Markarth's size and direct access to Skyrim's silver mines. No, we aren't sending the Thalmor ambassador away.

The White-Gold Concordant is too fragile and the Dominion's armies too strong to risk alienating them any further and playing with fire for another Great War. I don't like the Thalmor either, but we need to keep them docile enough to build the Empire's armies again to kick them back out, and for that we need time, so she stays.

You ask why the dragonborn has imperial sympathies? It's not sympathy for an imperialist power, it's recongition that this is the only legitimate possibility for a chance at peace again after all tge secessions and the incident at the Imperial City 30 years ago.

Sometimes you just gotta do dirty work to keep the wheels greased and the cart moving. I understand where you're coming from with a lot of things, Ulfric, but your blind fanaticism has both served the Thalmor's interests by diverting the precious resources of the army that can stand up to them fighting your stupid proxy war, and you have turned into a bigot chasing this traditionalist nord supremacy. You are part of the world, you're going to have to play ball with it. You can't have your secret third option and expect to have a Skyrim to come back to in 10 years.

"Even the dragonborn betrays Skyrim." Yeah, that's how a politician throws a tantrum when they don't get their way. But I won't speak up about the hypocrisy of implying that Skyrim's prophecized jesus-figure hero is somehow a traitor to it just because I didn't hand the victory to you on a silver platter. We got a ceasefire and didn't alienate the Thalmor while we need to buy time to regroup. That's the important part.

I don't know, man. When I was a kid I didn't think any of that through. And this time it came so naturally that it was like breathing for me.

It's a bit of a silly thing to draw comparisons through but I think it says something

#story about how skyrim made me realize how far ive come under the cut #skyrim #the elder scrolls #tes #tesv

[trainingdummyrabbit]

Woe

9, 14, 27

uouoauhg... explodes of Quemstions(tm)

9- tell a story about your childhood this one is . really funny actually bc i thought abt several stories and Most of them revolve around pokemon in one way or another .. there Have been several different times i was directly responsible for a boom in pkmn card popularity in my school, subsequently causing them to get banned. one of those times, there was a kid who just. he just fucking sucked man. id bring stacks of my cards in my backpack bc i loved sharing and trading them, and he just. apparently snuck in and stole like half of them? at some point? and i Knew, because my favorite card was one of em, and it had been out of print for Years at that point, and when i confronted him, he said he 'got it at walmart.' which was obviously fucking bullshit but i was too much of a pansy to confront him about it. iwas still solidly in the Polite School Kid thing, yknow? and at some point one of my friends from a lower grade went 'hey. check this out.' and pulls out a fucking wad of cards he stole back from the guy??? INCLUDING all of my missing favorites. im honestly still kinda baffled to this day about it, but it doesnt matter bc my beloved is safe at home with me even to this day and i wouldnt trade her for the world. <33 (if youre curious. 2006 salamence ex delta species. her name is sally :])

14- what’s something you’ve always wanted to do but maybe been to scared to do? roleplay. i used to spend hours and hours and Hours rping literally everywhere at any chance i got, and for some reason i just... stopped? ive tried again a few times, but its never really managed t pick itself back up again... ''> > im. unfortunately Very picky about my own writing, and even more picky than that about the way im perceived, which doesnt really mix well... and then theres the active rping communities which are so alien and... weirdly strict? i always end up pushing myself too hard and exploding about it. metaphorically. outwardly its more like i just fucken disappear off th face of the earth KJNGKJD;; itried picking up an old forum acc i had about two or three weeks ago, and um. well... bbbbad timing on my part iguess... = = storytelling is still one of my biggest loves though, and i know im still deeply passionate about it, its just. ouhhhhh the struggles. oh and also cosplaying in public. id love to do that too one day, if i manage to find some friends willing within a country's radius maybe. i used to Love videos of people hanging out semi-incharacter in cosplay and just being dorks... idont really see those too often lately though :< sad..

27- any nicknames? a couple! most of them are variants of my normal name, like pika or piko or pikkles or smthn. nobodys called me those in a long time though.. my names already short n shrimple, so there hasnt rly been much need for it isuppose. a personal favorite of mine is 19, though. i used t be in a discord server w a loooot of people, and we started a joke of a 'number cult,' in which we would all call each other by numbers and kept a list of who claimed what. mine was 19 :] (since 9 was taken already.) that... lasted well over a year actually, im still 19 to a lot of people out there ithink. kind of a comforting thought.

#i dont think im 19 anymore; but theyre still very close to me. if that makes sense. #icant claim the name like i used to; but i still carry th banner. yknow. #ithink someone in my friends list still has their number in their disc user. 34 if ur out there........ o7 #anyway this got Ridiculously wordy hai KJSNFKJDNG #piktalk #ask game #um um. th nicknames one also isnt including any aliases iwent by for awhile... i used to go by 'lulu' and 'john' in afew places. #something something if you know you know or whatever. those r too important for me to not mention also tho.

[lazulian-devil]

The bells of winter

I found another prompt I fucked around with and Im sure whoever wrote it meant something entirely different by it, but I dont care :p Enjoy!

Part 1 about a retiring pirate

(3K characters)

-----------

It had been an incredibly cold winter that left the wood half frozen when you brought it in the house. The ice crawled onto the windows, the snow sat in front of the doors and your breath was like cigarette smoke, hurting all the same in your throat and lungs. I didnt quite like it, but then again, nobody did.

It was a slow kind of terror that came with the wind, but decided to stay and wander our village. We hadnt invited it but none of us knew how to make it leave. And it was followed by all its children: Fear of hunger. Of freezing. Of pain. Of being unable to repair what would inevitably break under the ice pressure. Fear of loosing someone. Of loosing everyone. No amount of mittens, coats, hats, lined trousers and shoes could safe you from a cold that would freeze your beard if you didnt cover it. Or snowblind your eyes if you went out for too long. As I said. I didnt quite like it.

But I remember vividly the small green something that had broken through the snow in february. Everything was still so white, every step making that distinct crunching noise I never quite knew to put in words, my mittens more hole than cloth. But there it was, like a wound in the snow. Vivid. Green. Alive. Surrounded on all sides by slumbering trees and bushes. And the endless, all swallowing white of the world. The small blade of green had pushed away the snow around it, piercing through the blanket with more vigor and hope than I had felt in the last weeks. I didnt want to believe it yet. I didnt want to be hopeful. I had been, a few times before. When the elders told of the feelings in their bones, when a few birds came looking for seeds in our barn, when Maria finished spinning her threads of wool and started knitting me the itchiest and yet warmest sweater yet, so I could finally make the journey to Rivan without freezing to death. But all that hope had died on me not shortly after. The bones of the elders didnt mean anything when the storm hit. The birds were eaten. And Rivan was just as barren as our village. Nobody wanted to trade except for the children. They needed new knucklebones for their games. Something I at least could provide them with.

So, looking at that green wonder growing next to my trampled paths in the snow, I closed the door again and tried to forget about it. There were always outliers. It wasnt warm enough yet. How could it be.

By the next day, there were seven of them. Tiny knives, stabbing the snow. Soon enough, the first one I had found grew another blade and another, until a small blossom stretched itself towards the sun, its head opening up to a beautiful white bell, hanging and swaying in the wind. "Snowdrops." Maria said at the door and I agreed, a stack of firewood in my hand. Then she hushered me inside. The wind shouldnt get in after all.

And then, by the day, there were more. First a handful. Then a few dozen. Then hundreds. They grew wherever we hadnt trampled the snow down, always in bundles of four or five, as if they were holding on to one another when the winds came to shake the white bells they had for heads. I wondered if the other plants could hear them chime. "Look." They were saying to all the slumbering seeds under ground. "It will be over soon."

I agreed, reluctantly. Cautiously. My trust in the sun had been shaken a little too much. But I continued on regardless. And soon, when the snow started melting, leaving a patchwork of dirt and white and grass behind, things changed again. By the time the last snow drops blossomed in March, they were accompanied by others that had followed their call.

I wish I could have preserved them. But then again, I wouldnt need to look at them in summer, when everything is still green or in autumn, when everything is color. They are, all things concidered, quite boring little flowers. But when the timing is just right, they are the most beautiful thing you have ever seen.

#writing prompt #my writing #winter #snowdrop #writer blog #writers blog

[sea-of-monster-s]

Hire are few words about "Sea Of Monsters"

So "Sea Of Monsters" is a story & world of mine that revolvs around pirates, sea creatures and monsters and many more other things

The Story ( when i finish it i will edit this post ) is simple but fun, basicly its about a group of cretures that becomes a pirate crew and ventures to diffrent seas to have amazing adventures

If you wish what to continue exploring the world of SOM then you may prosead

(continuing youll learn details about every Ocean, Sea, Sea Monster and main Island thats visible on the map)

Enchiant Ocean

Enchiant Ocean is known as the biggest and, as the wrighting of the old past say, the first ever ocean that made the other oceans and seas, this ocean is rather picefull with low levels of salt in it. The sea creatures hire are picefull too and they are very friendly, but due to the resant events of pirates slaughtering them for no given reason they went in to hideing, how sad. The land creatures hire consist of humans and other creatures are pretty friendly too, from this ocean comes the most pirate crews then from any other sea or ocean.

EnvLuck Island

Envluck Island is the most populated island on the Enchiant Ocean, on it there is a strange power that makes everyone luckier, because of that gambling became a common thing on this island. Many diffrent creatures from many diffrent seas come to trade many diffrent and special things, that you wouldnt find normaly on this Ocean, its nice to come there once in a waile to try your luck and see what creatures are trading.

Snake Islands

Snake Islands are Islands that have larger reptalian and well snake population, the main thing that thes reptalians do are many inventions that help many oceans and seas, the thing they invent are amazing like sea creature translator or even atomic powered core that dosent need maintenanse, only a cooling system to keep it cold, when you what to visit this island, they they are fine with it, just try to not cause a scean or dont destroy anything, they might eat you.

Flower Islands

Flower Islands are Islands that have many speciaes of flowers that can be found on diffrent seas and oceans, somehow they all are on the same island. The island is protected by a huge sea serpant and a small dragon that lives on the biggest tree thats on the island, if you what to see the beauti of the flora, be respectfull of the protectors and respect the flora because they will get very mad when you start to destroy the flowers.

High Islands

High Islands are Islands that have high moutions on them, they are very difficult to climb because of theier smother serfase near the bottom, the top of the moutions are ocupied by winged monsters that chose to hide in the moutions away from others, they are very dangerous too so its best to leave them alone in theier forever paradise

Island Crab

Island Crab is an island that formed on top of a gigant crab, this island is mainly populated by humans, they arent scared of land creatures but they are terrefied of sea creatures, theier island is protected by the crab and the powerfull wisard, they both work togheter to protect each other, if you wish to visit this island youll need to act friendly and non thretening to the crab or the people to the island, they are really sceptical about sea creatures tho.

GoldShell Ocean

GoldShell Ocean is a really special ocean that has golden colored water, this color is caused by a gigant population of GoldenShell snails that cause the water to change color, the snails dont cause any economical damage so its alright to kill them, they breed like crazy and theier population keeps getting bigger. The water there is safe to drink and use for long time use, but when wood enters the water is starts to decay faster, but a nice coat of thick paint will stop the effects, Sea Creature s there are really sceptical about any ship that enters its waters, when pirates attack one village almoust the entire ocean comes to slay the enemy, one thing is clear tho, if your nice to them so will they. The land creatures are consideret to be jerks because they talk how rich they are, it gets pretty anoying when they do that.

GGShell Island

GGShell Island or Gigant Golden Shell Island is the richest island in the entire ocean, its people have really expensive and beautiful things that you wouldnt see in a normal villige but they are also genorous and can help you with anything, theier island has one of the geatest chefs and fabrics patterns ocean can give, they can even offer holidays on some of the smaller islands, and its all for some golden snail shells, if you wanna chill out from all the adventures you had i sugest hunting some snails now

Golden Forest

Golden Forest is a quiet place for sea creatures to relax, this island has beautifull golden trees and brown grass, if you what to enter the forest make sure you are quiet, because no one whats anoyed sea creatures

Castle Crab

Castle Crab is a gigant crab that has a huge cave over it, the crab is a so called protector of the golden snails but all he does is hang around and let the snail climb on top of him, giving the once grey walls a golden color, he doesnt mind if you take the snails away, but it will mind if you attack it, so be carefull around him.

Ship Worm

Ship Worm is one of the sea creatures that protects the others, it wont mind you untill you desided to attack a sea creature, it will attack sudently and will destroy your ship in an instant. Leaving you in the ocean of angry sea creatures

Lunar Sea

Lunar Sea was once a part of Enchiant Ocean, but then a star has fallen down and created this sea, this sea is a really picefull one being at number one safety, inside is purely magical. Because the star is going to be forever active it will give the ocean a lavender color from all the magic thats leaking out of it, the sea creatures there where split in to two, one kind thats been there before the star, they use the stars power to make better tools and to use it for good, and the second kind that appered from the stars magic, theier form is purely made from magic and they will act as any other fish or plant, the land creatures use the magic to grow theier villiges in a magical way and to learn the dark magic thats much powerfull, the dark magic there isnt used for evil but good, its comonly used to open portals or to scare off gigant sea monsters, also large amounts of wizards come from hire. This sea is a really beautifull place to explor.

Shrimp Islands

Shrimp Islands are a group of Islands that are mainly populated by wizards and are islands that are really close to the fallen star, on thos islands are pretty powerfull wizards that have mastered the arts of dark magic and chose to use it of the greater good, thos islands can offer you magic scrols that can show you an undiscovered tresure, magic necleses that can ither have a curse in them or something good and potions, they also can sell you slaves that where considered guilty for stealing theier enchiant scrols or where using dark magic for evil. Its a pretty good islands to visit when you need to stuck up on some magic items

Star Island

Star island is a island that converts power of the star into jewlary that makes any spells stronger, and not only that but the crystals look stuning and are used in many clothes to give them a pretty look. If you what any power crystals to make your spells stronger then you better get some hire

UpSideDown Lake

UpSideDown Lake is a failed dark magic experiment to open a portal to another world, when the spale was castet it entered a small lake, this wasnt supoust to happend and now the lake became ten times bigger and became a perfect circle, the lake became a mirror in to a unknown side that shows many friendly light beings that enjoy interacting with the wizards and other creatures, they also teach some wizards something called launguage of the stars, so that one day they can be found, suprisingly you are able to walk on the lake but you cant enter it by a ship.

Moon Island

Moon Island is a really special place for wizards that to find the light beings inside the upside down lake, they will study stars and they are finding new magic patterns in them, its a pretty compticated thing if you arent a wizard but maybe some day we all are going to understand them

Mermaid Shore

Just outside the Lunar Sea are islands that that are called Mermaid Shore, on them are friendly mermaids that can take your ship on one of the island so you can repair them, or they can heal you using theier singing, this just a friendly place in this horible world

BloodLust Sea

BloodLust Sea became what it is today after two god like sea monster killed each other is a fight, the fight happend suddently and its bealived that it was for tertory reasons, both monsters where killed at the same time by eathother, that made the sea bloody red, the blood effected everyone in that new sea, they became more agresive and more brutal when it comes to tertory, they also gotten a taste of thos gigants blood and they crave more, because of that many sea creatures there are big dangerous monsters that fight for theier life and tertory, land creatures became masters at making killing machines to get thos monsters at all cost. They all are crazy over power that they forgot who they truely are, and they will never look back at themselfs

Beast Caverns

Beast Caverns is a main island of the most dangerous ones, they somehow are somewhat tamed to thos who enter theier island but they can get agresive when you look at them weard, they can offer you a many diffrent bones that can be used in a lot of usefull tools, you can also watch fights on special arenas betwean the bigger beasts that what to bring out a show to everyone around to be happy.

Red Forest

Once the dead sea was formed, part of mearged with the bloodlust sea, the once dead forest became lush with bloodshot leafs and pink grass, somehow the island became carnivourus so you better be careful when you enter it, you also can find some of the less dangerous creatures there, but its still best to stay out of sight.

Cult Island

A strange unknown cult...

Crystal Sea

Crystal Sea, was once a peacefull place full of good and happy creatures, but everything changed when they all tryed to summon theier god, everything turned out to the worsed because since theier god died when they tryed to summon him black blood begone to leak from the sky and turned everyone in to stone, the sea since then turned in to a dangerous place, the black blood morphed into scaryiest creatures mind can think of the sea from its white and pearly color turned grey and full of dark bubbles that are actually thos creatures, do best to not disturb them otherwise you might see something horrofing.

Holy City

Holy city is now a forgoten memory that was once bright, this place was once full of bealives that theier god would come and asend them all in to his forever paradise but his dying blood spilled brining quiet distruction to this place and the entire sea, old notes show that they have comunicated with their god many times before but many many other notes were ithere stolen or destroyed.

WasteLand Sea

WasteLand Sea bacame what it is today after the death of the Nuclear Spider, it caused the arena around it to become radioactive and really dangerous, the land and sea life that where near it became twisted and dangerous to everyone around, they also became twice as big and everyone there has a taste for meat.

Power Plant

Power Plant is a island that has creatures that havent lost theier minds since the blast, they have discovered a powersource a plant that if you care for it right you can get strong energy that can be used to all sorts of stuff, thats why they built this place, to be safe from the outside and so that they can help the world with theier found purpous

Spider Venom Ile

Spider Venom Ile is a place where all the most dangerous monsters live, they will hunt and eat theier smaller kind just to stay some what full, thiere home is inside the skull of the Nuclear Spider, it almoust seams like they get theier power from inside of there but we will never know that because you would melt in an instant if you would stand right next to its remains

The Spine

The Spine is a place where winged monsters found theier place, they all became somehow bling and will get around using smell and sound but they will just all day hand and sleep because they have forgot theier purpous that was onec so clear to them

BadLands

BadLands are islands where all the little and normal mutated monsters go, they spend theier days living in fear and confusion, they want to escape but they cant pass the dead sea, they are scared of theier purpous that is to be food for the bigger ones.

Dead Sea

Dead sea was formed after the blast from the NS, this became known as the "Dead Zone" for any mutated creatures that try to escape from the WasteLand, the sea creatures there became really distorted, more than even the mutated ones, some of them deside to spend theier day weaping at the bottom of the sea and trying to accept theier form, because the blast gave them immortality, other confort one another and hunt thos mutated ones so that the corruption that happend to them wouldnt happend to the rest of the sea, land creatures too kept thier minds sane but they are now confused and lost, the use their immortality to study the life of mutated ones from a far, they have nothing better to do anyway.

Dead Forest

Dead Forest is a place where few remaining land creatures try to adapt in to theier new lives, but they just become wild and they slowly lose theier minds, this place is quiet and feels calming being hire, you can still interact with thos poor creatures and they will enjoy your company, in this forest theres nothing to be found or to be seen, just brocken creatures that try to adapt to thiere immortality

Monster Castle

After the sea formed a monster from below emerged and the Monster Castle was born, on the "island" there is an human that owns the castle and the monster and if your nice to him he can show you around the castle, the castle seams to have its own life, its moving, breathing and sometimes twitching. Strange...

Siren Depths

When the NS died part of its flesh has fallen down and has taken a form of a maggot, it then move its self into the border between Dead and Wasteland to make its new empire, the maggot started creating eggs that where something horrofing, a sea monster that could lure pirates to thier deaths and shape shifting to look like a beautiful woman, the siren was born then, the Siren Depths are theier nest and the place where the maggot became something more then a monster, a leader of sirens, theier mother

Unknown Sea

Unknown Sea is a pretty big mystery, firstly the sea is infested with all kinds of gigant sea monsters, its unknown why there thos enchiant beast come there or what attracts the there, but secondly they are seems that they are protecting something, nothing is documented so far because of the sea monsters attacking anyone who enters theier waters.

Unknown Pillar

Unknown Pillars are monuments that a wizard had notised on his flight, there are five pillars that seam to have gigant chains attached to them. As the wizard said the chains go all the way to the bottom and they seam to hold something, some kind of monster thats ten times bigger then the other monsters, its bealived that one day this thing will break free and bring terror to the oceans and seas, but thats just a old tale

Silent Sea

The Silent Sea or also known as the Silent Eye is a sea in a shape of an eye that nobody knows anything about, when you enter this sea some say something will speak to you, an unknown sea entity but when you exit the sea, somehow, you will have no memory of anything that happened inside the sea, any notes or photos that youll took will become blank once you exit it, the mystery is even deeped because when you stay in the sea for too long your ship will slowly move to the middle, once your there you just disapear and only fog will remain in your place, many say that the fog is your lost soul that doesnt know that they are dead and they swim thru the forever ocean of nothingness, trying to break free from the cycle. The sea also has a start and the end being two gigant pillars that seam to streach infinitly to the sky, many attempts where made to break them to no avail. Hopefully thos who entered the eye will find piece some day...

#Sea Of Monsters #OWND #fantasy #pirates

[tatsumi-harem-chronicles]

[1]ok sorry in my mind rn is a nonidol au :bonk:

[anon1]so what happens to aira what does he like

he can be the one (1) little guy aspiring to be an idol i allow him to be

[1]This actually on my mind constantly :subaruagree: Mostly bc I like dreaming of how directionless and lost some of them are 🤤

[anon1]nonidol au wtf would eichi and aira do [2]subaru still has a dad

[2]:o and this means kaname still has a mom, and a home, and can invite Beemeru to said home

Kanata still sitting in the cult cus without idols he has no reason to leave:

[3]Trade offer: You get - a happy kaname with a loving family consisting of his mother and beemeru I get - disillusioned bitter aira who could never achieve his dream and was so wandered around for a long time hallow and feelingless until he met alkaloid (whatever they are) and delving all his passion and energy into what they do instead (also IN MY MIND JUST NOW aukaloid paint studio they painters who own their own studio trying to get it on the map. Tatsumi paints symbolic shit, hiiro works in abstract-impressionest portraits and scenery, mayoi's paintings swing between cute animals +moments and dark masses of foreboding color that instill heavy motions of unease, and aira usually paints large sceneries with maybe some small people hidden within the masses of the space all exuding feelings of nostalgia/ longing) and I also get bitter ceo eichi cause why not :eichicrime:

i dont like you /joke

Paint studiokaloid on the mind now 😔will not leave [3]typical aira headcannon says he finds out aabt the wonderful world of idols around mid-school era, so that we can have that wonderful "life was empty and meaninglesss b4 idols" :arashilove: but for this au imma say he finds out abt it when hes in elementary shcool, a baby, one could say. so he goes in bright eyed and happy bc while he hasn't expierenced true sadness yet he has seen what real joy feels like and is gung-ho about channeling it himelf! :airalove: and even tho all the auditions and talent compitions his mom is enrolling him in always end in failure, he can't give up! a true idol is never lets anything get them down! but then he works too hard and gets a fever, a very serious one too. but. the boy won't. he doesn't know how to stop. and he sings and practices his way through the sickness, lost in a haze of work get better gotta improve gotta make it gotta win and. he tears his vocal chords. violently by the time the doctors get to him its already too late, he can barely speak anymore. the only things able to escape his mouth being pained noises. "with physical therapy, we can get him back to the point of being able to say a few words at a time" *but when can i sing? * "i'm sorry kid, you cant. not anymore." and thus, his dreams are crushed. so n e ways aft that he spends his entire school career soundless. fluttering into the background like a leaf falls to the ground. letting time pass by as he grows without feeling anything, learning to keep a notebook on him at all times, because it was safest to assume the person in front of him wouldnt be able to sign back (or maybe they just didn't want to talk to him at all?) 1/3

ok what the fuck /NM BDJDBF JUST . WOW IN A /POS WAY !!!

his family is relatively well off, so he decides to take a gap year between highschool and college, moving out into an apartment of his own *to be a bit more independent, to figure out what i want to do * he says, but really, its to escape from reality a little bit longer. one day, he finds someone hopelessly lost at the train station. the red haired boy's eyes glazed over in confusion, head tilting side to side like a puppy. he helps the boy to his location, frustrated about the fact he needs to explain seemingly everything about city life to the bumbkin. when they get to the doors of a small building, front full of windows revealing the mess of moving boxes and tarps inside, the boy invites him in. "maybe you can join us! your handwriting is really nice! we need help writing letters and making fancy cards!" the boy offers. aira huffs, wondering what kind of stupid offer was that? but he follows him in anyways, nothing better to do it was the best decision he'd ever made. 2/3 aira joins as the group's penman bc he was enraptured by the paintings he saw (namely, one of hiiro's portraits my mother, he said, a wistful smile ghosting his lips. his red hair seeming dull in comparision to the burning bonfire of explosive paint in front of him, the canvas eclipsing his form multiple times over. looming over them like a giant, although one full of friendliness and warmth.) but eventually starts learning how to paint out of intrest (he takes tips from everyone really but his main teacher is mamayoi, which can be seen as they use some of the same color pallets and techniques/motifs :mayoishy: ) aira doesn't speak often, but when he does everyone listens this makes a very cute moment where kohiiai are on a date or almost-date and something happens that upsets aira but kohaku&hiiro stand up for their lil love bug and while aira does end up pulling them away from starting a fight he can't help the warm butterflies fluttering across his cheeks. in the end, he drags them onto a bench. sitting them down although never letting go of their sleeves. "ᵗʰᵃⁿᵏ ʸᵒᵘ…" he murmurs, a sound so quiet it would have been missed by anyone other than his two hyper-sensative boys. hiiro perks up, loudly declaring that it's alright and that he would do anything for him! kohaku is more subdued, but equally as happy. a proud smile gracing his lips and… are those a hint of tears forming in his eyes? n e ways the first time aira tells them he loves them no one survives the Emotional Damage and kohiiai fluff 💯 they can be cuties the end :arashilove: :kohakupout: :hiiroconfusion: :airalove: /3

when everything else tries to brutally murder your soul, you can count on kohiiai to be wholesome as fuck 😌

until pensive TWISTS kohiiai in a way that HURTS ME

even when the kohiiai murders your soul in the end at least the way there was wholesome as fuck <-speaking in shoujo rei timeline :subaruagree:

the wholesome happy romance of kohiiai is the only thing i refuse to taint ever [4]they can all suffer individually but when they together they be loved

i acutally rlly like painter studio aukaloid tho :mayoishy: its subsidized by my own feelings towards painting my cannon-typical alkaloid brainrot :tatsumiacceptance: [4]:subaruagree: til death do them part

[5]so when do i get to be let out of the torture chamber :kiibodipshit2:

[5]no </3

HELP MEE

dw u love it here ^^

#enstars #ensemble stars #nonidol au #mods talk #writing snippets #asta torture #”implied” alkafam #aira shiratori #eventual kohiiai #aira angst posts #misc

[frankollini]

i think id like to just. start Talking More in this blog. let shit out, y'know? and to start, i wanna talk about akira toriyama a bit. more specifically, i wanna share some important memories i have of dragon ball.

a vivid memory i have is going with my cousin and a friend of his to the library (because at that point it was one of the only places with An Internet Connection and A Computer and A Printer) and we would print pictures of dbz episodes yet to air in portugal.

we'd often get confused over dbz in the internet, because in portugal they changed picollo's name to 'Satan' and mr. satan was known as Hercules. or because we'd see new transformations or characters and have zero context for them. we got real confused over goten.

speaking of portugal: our dragon ball z dub is fucking infamous. it is so funny. it is littered with portuguese references (characters would often reference portuguese tv channel names, celebrities, shows). there was a lot of screaming that the pt va clearly didn't care for, so it was not uncommon for characters to start singing amidst their screams. vegeta changed vas 3 times and at some point he breaks the 4th wall to comment about it.

i think the vas at the time thought the show was dumb as fuck and didn't care enough and just had a ton of fun. it was absolutely horrible, and an universally loved dub. i wouldnt exchange the portuguese dbz dub experience for anything in this world.

along with pokemon and sonic, goku and gohan were some of the first things i started drawing. i got introduced to tracing paper and i'd trace over magazine pictures, trading card pictures, posters, everything i could fine. dragon ball was one of the strongest early artistic influences for me. everything had big muscles and crazy long hair it was *so fucking cool*.

there is a shared experience throughout most kids who grew up in the 90s/00s of performing the motions for the kamehameha during recess. or having that one classmate who couldn't watch dbz and participate on the fun because his mother wouldn't allow them to see it, it was 'Too Violent'.

as i grew up, dragon ball kept being somewhat relevant to my life. I read and re-read the manga dozens of times. GT didn't really hit it for me, but i still got a bunch of vhs tapes for the first few arcs. i played a lot of the games. there was final bout for the playstation, supersonic warriors for the gba and ds. the budokai tenkaichi games. i was still playing budokai tenkaichi games well into my mid 20s with my college roommates!

at that point, i started getting into dragon quest too, and i always really liked toriyama's artstyle when translated to pixels and 3d models.

i haven't really followed super closely except for watching one or two movies, but db in general has always remained very dear and close to my heart. so it isn't surprising to know that it broke a little bit today.

i am very grateful for mr. toriyama and all he created. may he rest in peace.

#frankisms #akira toriyama #dragon ball

[r0mantic-h0micide]

i want to hold hands and be cute and be sweet. thats what i want

a kiss on the cheek. laughing at stupid shit. laughing while going in for a kiss.

"i hate you" "no you dont"

i want all of that, but i dont really have someone to want that with

and all the men ive been speaking to lately, dont have my interest. i find myself bored with them. to the point where i just might delete my dating app.

im tired of talking to people. tired of pretending im nice when im not. tired of trying to get people to perceive me in the way i want them to, instead of them just doing it naturally.

when someone sees me, i want them to see me. i dont want to have to explain. im tired of telling people about myself. i just want them to know. and i know thats not fair and it doesnt make any sense but thats just how i feel.

maybe right now, even though i want love and companionship, i just dont have room for it. im not really even lonely. i am, sometimes. sometimes im lonely and tired and i just want a hug. but overall, im fine. normally i want to be alone, but right now it seems that i find myself being my favorite company. i dont feel the need to go after someone or impress someone. i just want to be left alone. ive always loved being alone, but right now it feels like i dont really need anyone else. im not used to that feeling.

maybe its the pristiq. maybe its evening me out enough to not need emotional crutches, like men. ive always been so boy crazy. always looking for someone to date. but right now, im cool. im chillin. im going to work and making my plans with my friends. i get up and out of bed and get dressed. and some days are still hard, but im better. i know im better. its weird to be better. to not be fulfilled by another person, but to be fulfilled by myself. i dont know if i like or dislike the feeling. i suppose i dont mind it.

who knew life could be like this? ive always sort of enjoyed my crazy. i like my big feelings. i love them. they make me feel human even when sometimes i dont feel very human. but theyre so tiring and burdensome.

if i went of the meds tomorrow, really, i wouldnt trade my emotions for the world. i love them. i think it's beautiful that i get to feel so deeply. but this is nice. it's peaceful. it feels odd to not need to cry for no reason.

eventually, i'll figure out how i feel about being normal. i dont know how i feel about it now because its so new. but maybe in a few months when ive been like this for a while and im more comfortable with it, i'll know.

its okay that i dont know now. i'll just take things one day at a time

[itsmentalillness]

i wouldnt trade the experience for the world, lemme preface with that. it was life changing for me academically but socially i feel very drained and discouraged. its not that i dont have friends because i do and i adore them but sometimes i feel like they dont see me as someone who needs support. its like they see me as this strong person who always has the time to take care of them and never has their own problems. but i dont wanna get too sappy because like i said it has opened a whole new world for me career wise and such. ive been given two (i think three actually) on campus jobs that fit perfectly so my majors. and just really made me passionate and excited for being a english/latin teacher. and if youre interested, i can tell you all about my love life? is its called that during the past few weeks:)

in terms of advice, dont settle on friends or who you surround yourself with. you will probably be around them 24/7 so really make sure they are people you want to be around and never be afraid to let go of people. you will always find more people to be around. and seize the opportunities around you. join clubs or honors societies when they arise. they open doors to things that can really benefit you and potentially alter your career path in a great way. just make sure you keep your mind open to trying new things during the first year

I would love to hear about the love life if you’re down to share

that sounds awesome. i’m glad you found a good place in college. i’m excited for i start in the fall, i’ve started looking into on campus clubs and stuff as well as off campus. I also know some kids from my current hs who are going to be within a 30 minute drive (they’re some of my best friends and I know i’ll visit them) but i’ve talked to a couple people who are going to my school

I found some temples in the area cause I want to be more in touch with that as well as some solid looking russian stores/restaurants/flea markets cause that’s always been super important to me

i’m excited to see what happens in the next year

#jenn!! #jenn!

[imsorryisuck]

AP,

I felt so bad about myself for such a long time. Because you rejected me and ignored me so many times. At the same time, I never felt more on top of the world than when I discovered you. The way you looked at me, that same look you gave hundreds of other blonde girls. You captivated me. You gave me a light in the boring ass world I was in. You are one of the few men that I drove hundreds of miles for. I literally felt a real connection to you even though we had such minimal contact. I wanted you so bad. I had a goal to give you a lap dance at one point 🤮🫣. I sold weed so I could see you. The only thing I am ever guilty of is loving you to pieces and supporting you. Now, when I think of you, I just think of the lies you made the world believe.

And now I sit here and say that I wish I wouldn’t have wasted all of those years thinking about you. That I wouldnt have wasted all of my money on gas, your “art” and everything else. But at the same time, I would not trade the memories I have of you and that time. For anything because at that time, it was everything I wanted.

I made more enemies than friends when I liked you.

I’m gonna include some memories at some point for this one. It’s just gonna take me awhile to conjure them up.

[1reallylongrat]

Another little life update. i might do these once a month, its oddly theraputic. even though only a few people will read this, its still nice. its like a little journal.

Its been a bit iffy for the past few weeks. ive had a cancer scare, and i still dont know whats wrong, but hopefully its getting better. i also had a pregnancy scare, though thats come and gone. On top of that, ive had people harrasing me in my instagram, though luckily i have a loving (and slightly protective) boyfriend to shut them down and keep my spirits relatively happy.

Ignoring all that, as hard as it may be, ive been pretty damn good. My jobs going well, and will hopefully be sending me off to an ornithology camp that i went too last year. looking forward to seeing old friends, new animals, and running around the woods for a week lol. Im about to be the only person left from my original team, which is gonna be crazy. 15 years old and a team lead. yeesh, could not have predicted where this job would take me, and i wouldnt trade it for the world.

In terms of boyfriend, we are still happy, and i still cant believe we waited three years for this. hes allowed over to my house now, and i couldnt be happier curled up in my little horde of stuffed animals with my giant puppy of a man, Hopefully he can come to springing the blues iwth me on sunday. my new swimsuits supposed to come in, the weather should be nice on the beach, and theres free live music...even if it is the blues.

Things are much better than they were a year ago. i sometimes miss my old friends, but i know for the most part im better off without them. Im doing better. i am better. and i will continue to be better.

Until next month

-Star

[t-urbulence]

tlou spoilers ig idk issssmyopinion cause i cant tell linn about them cause she asked for no spoilers and i already yelled about it to sara and my sister and i dont know any more people.

i dont think there was anything i didnt like tbh. sarah was really gooddddd, the actor nailed that shit on the head. i like how they established more that tommy depends on joel, with the jail thing, and how they shared the job at the start, i think that was really good. there was more set up about the neighbours too, i just think all that was really cool.

none of the direct quotes from the game felt like pandering or fanservice, which i liked, all of them were really welcome for me. (Didnt think i would sob at hearing a teenage girl say "i sell hardcore drugs" as a joke but here we are.)

I liked that it was all from sarah's POV in the beginning. in the game one of the most poignant scenes is trying to escape in the car, how the adults are in the front seat making the calls and everything is happening around you and all you can do is turn the camera and watch. it was nice that you could like, see her interact with the world even if for a short bit. it didnt feel drawn out or unnecessary, it was sufficiently Paced.

none of the direct quotes from the game felt like pandering or fanservice, which i liked, all of them were really welcome for me. (Didnt think i would sob at hearing a teenage girl say "i sell hardcore drugs" as a joke but here we are.)

the worldbuilding was really nice, like im sure it couldve been done more extensively in the game as well, seeing the QZ and how it works and all that, not just through cutscenes but i do get why they wouldnt do it, they did, however, have time for it on the show, which i really liked. the whole circle of trades joel got through to get info on tommy. i love that tommy is more present from the beginning. like in the game we were looking for him when we find him but it comes up as an idea later in the game like "okay what now, ig lets go find tommy" but here he's already established to be. Out There. and something happened between him and joel that we dont know anything about yet.

i am wary of tess a liiiittle bit because annie wersching is just so fucking good. like when they said she walked into the audition As Tess, you just know they mean it. and i only ever saw anna torv as olivia in fringe and shes good in that but a part of her character is that she's a little grey and a little unnoticable and all that so. i was a little afraid. and sure she gives off a different vibe but she has that same gentleness juuust below the surface that game tess did, and i love that joel really is just the muscle, but tess is the brain and the authority in the pair.

so that was good.

marlene is 100%, i really loved her. i dont know why i thought seeing her wear the same simple clothes as game marlene did was such a huge deal that i had to hyperventilate, but you know. like dude, its a tank top, calm down.

anyway. i was fine with all of the changes, i dont think anything they changed took away anything from the characters. maybe i expected them to react to the fungi'd body a little differently. like the spores were already established and seeing a bitch like that should mean its about to start sporing but. maybe its just a detail that theyre. not. supposed to wear a gas mask at that point.

ig thats the one thing that made me go hOL'UP. but nothing else i can recall

the fireflies were alright, like we see the explosion from the game just somewhere else in the game so we see about as much of them in the show as in the game.

obviously, i think ellie's actor has the most to prove which, goddamn, thats gotta be Some pressure eh. but i think she did well. the few lines she had were well written, they got her character through well. but i also loved how once they were outside and in danger following tess and joel, she really was just a scared kid who's really just trying to Appear Big and scary by cursing and yelling and lashing out at new people and being a little brat.

i dont think i have any like, observations about her as of now. i liked her on screen, obviously shes never gonna be the same as ashley johnson ellie but i also dont want her to be? actually there were two lines where i felt like she was imitating game ellie (or it really just came across like that for my ears) and that actually bothered me more than when she was "different". which. she is, obviously x)

so yeah i really like her, to me it all hinges on her chemistry with joel. i think the actor will do a fine job if the dynamic is written well.

joel for now is kind of a blank slate i guess, classic hardened badass that he was in the game as well. so im excited for him to become a real character next to the cast of characters they'll meet along the way and as their relationship with ellie transforms.

for now, the show is really promising, it really got me hyped, i cried, i laughed, i literally screamed out loud when they mentioned riley x') so it had me in my tlou feels, definitely.

but im also wary because of the video game adaptation curse thats been going for centuries x) also for some reason adaptations often love to go tits up right before the ending? like they want to do something else something different and have their own moment. i expect and accept a lot more changes thats not the issue but just dont... steal the heart of the story, okay?

thank.

also i had no idea they kept gustavo for the music so i may have wept when i heard the theme song. i have sooOOO MANY fond memories of playing the game for the first time. it was such a special, special experience with giules in rome, playing a video game for the first time in my life, having so many great experiences just being with her family and all. listening to the OST on the beach together :")

ahh so good.

anyway, feels. yes. good. lets go. i have faith.

#pedroooooooooOOOOOO #tlou thing #ayyeeeeeee

[the-spacecoffee-pearl89]

stoner thoughts maybe?

so the scheme of things

gender and all doesn’t really matter to me. it all comes down to doctors really. I don’t think gender should matter in love or life really. personally i prefer masculine pronouns but i so am not lookin as androg as i used to lol. i seriously think it comes down to self on a public spectrum and i hate others dont feel that way. 

like, we really just need to care about eachother. times are getting rough and about to get worse. and although i try to avoid it all i see on any news or broadcasts is people vs people. gay vs straight, black vs white, this that. 

um.... the world is old as fuck in a universe that is ever expanding and the plant is new in an already old area of our portion of the expansion. we have been searching outward since we decided to explore and only now have we realized that. we are seeing the death of something we don’t know and we think that fighting and hating some one because of something as small as how they see themselves while walking on the same dying planet? 

the sun is showing signs of fucking with us more and its a ticking time bomb literally. 2029 isn’t too far and there is a pretty huge rock we fear has a pretty good chance of taking out a few satellites if it passes up. hoping for it to curve. 

we are also making it hard for eachother to survive. have you noticed how stocked places are? is it as stocked as it used to be? notice what they are out of?  i work in a tourist town where for the past few months we havent had medicine. literally bare! and we are not the only ones. Part of mine and others jobs are making the shelves look stocked when they aren’t. we have to go back to trade and barter. sharing is caring now. home made goods as well as just doing stuff the old way. 

we will struggle and there is going to be something big coming. thing is we will be dead by then and the next generations need to learn that it’s not the labels but the person that matters. how you exist on this earth and use the earth to help others. 

i know its hippie ideas, but if we stop thinking about gender and treat eachother as equals i think it would change things a lot. the next generations need the future to be the focus and not the past and things that used to divide humans. focus on connecting instead. 

i mean i get laughed at for saying if we start in early gym and instead of having things like “female workout” make it just the “male work out” things for kids as young as kindergarten and then keep doing that for that class for the following years and so on. but keep doing it like that (since the classes prior would have surpassed the timing ya know) then they would see eachother as equals and they would learn to train their muscles the same. girls wouldnt be starting at a ‘weaker’ state. also i cant do female pushups now since i broke my leg lol. it was hard before and some teachers didnt really enforce that. however for runs and most others it was weirdly boy girl and even in sports it’s like that. if you train all little humans to do the same pace and as they grow you will literally see a generation difference and see if women are really weaker or are all humans just the same. i’d like to think we are. if we try this maybe we can see eachother as equals. i may be dead but at least the people living in that kind of future can actually look more into themselves as individuals wanting to help other individuals around them physically not online. 

the earth is burning and it isn’t even at the worst point yet, the next generations may deal with even worse food shortages and no more room for them. land is a fighting ground and so are homes. roe v. wade is over turned so theres going to be more and more people on this earth that will be eventually out in the world looking for a home some where. we are running out of room. it’s scary to think of us not trying now to have a society of caring and helping eachother. 

the earth is going to stop giving and we won’t have food. we will starve and burn to death. maybe no one reading this but the future generations are looking at the end of the life cycle of a planet orbiting around a dying star. we need to live in peace and start helping eachother because greed in hard times is scary. instead of ripping eachother apart we need to help. trade isn’t that bad and farmers markets are amazing. that might be life again and that is not a bad thing. going out to your community around you isn’t as scary as some make it out to be. and if it is then yes fight back, but by showing kindness and calm not agression. it’s scary where i live but even a small mixed ace chick like me has had to learn how to behave around crazies, lol i’m bpd and behavior is a big focus for me and shit. although it’s scary sometimes just being a cool calm head when some one is screaming in my face helps me settle a situation.

i don’t know maybe i’m just a stoner that looks too into space and thinks weirdly of our meaning of acknowledging our existance as one of many different beings on our planet that we are no diffrent than at this point with our need for sex and violence just in weirder ways

#i really like space i was thinking about life and gender and stuff omg please no hate

[actualbird]

tot plot rambles: so i replayed the beginning of main story 5.1 (needed screencaps for a meme, HAHA) and came across vyn’s line 

and ive suddenly got a few thoughts about this omfg

1) vyn, how exactly r u monitoring The Psychological Conditions Of The Team? given the current tense dynamic of the team towards vyn from non-mc characters, i can only frigging imagine how AWKWARD a guidance counseling session basically would be.

vyn: how are you coping with your PTSD from the kendricks case?

artem: im not. are we done yet? i hate this.

vyn: we are not done yet

artem: i hate this

either that or vyn monitors in a hands-off way, without confrontation. most probably this route is more possible, since it wouldnt skew the behavior of the one hes keeping tabs on

2) speaking of the kendricks case, as of main story 6.2, it’s canon the the Original NXX Investigation was giann, neil, and vyn. that really is making my brain light up with fireworks but im not smart enough to make theories, it just strikes me as Sublimely Interesting. hes the only original member left. what does that mean?

3) even in the OG NXX team, vyn’s say irt the team’s psychological state had a Lot Of Sway. so much to the point that neil couldnt go on that undercover thing because vyn deemed neil not fit for the job, mentally. which THEN makes me go, HEY, NICE, cuz heres one probable reason now why vyn and artem have beef with each other (aside from their personalities). artem thinks the absolute World of neil, but vyn’s assessment deemed neil lacking of Something. artem is a logical person, of course, but it’s still possible to have some resentment from that

4) if vyn was in the OG NXX and vyn has been assessing all potential new candidates, hoyoverse, im gonna need to see what card game vyn played with marius and artem to assess them. if not, i can only speculate. cuz if it was the same card tower thing, itd be super interesting to explore marius and artem’s choices and rationale. but if it were a different card thing for everybody, that would be cool too. 

and also vaguely hilarious for the team to make fun of further down the line

marius, pulling out a pokemon trading card, mimicking vyn’s voice badly: My Lady, what are your psychological thoughts on this

mc, pulling out a reverse uno card: no You

vyn: that is not how this works. that is not how Any of this works

5) still on the topic of vyn and new candidates: the only person vyn wouldnt have been able to assess, solely because his say would be negligible, is luke

because luke was ordered to join the team on NSB orders

thats also interesting to me. because taken further, luke basically has a govt sanctioned get out of jail free card, irt psychological state. vyn can monitor, vyn can give his thoughts, 

but if the NSB wants luke to do something in the nxx,  vyn---on the grounds of regular nxx operations procedures---cant stop him

#tears of themis #tears of themis headcanons #ive got thoughts in my brain....