#i guess i like to be known LOL

[stergeon]

enbarr, sometime in 1186:

ok so @frozenartscapes made this addition to my post about byleth and edelgard writing each other letters all the time, right:

well i kind of lost my mind and now we're here.

i'm sure this meeting is salvageable :0) hubert's sanity, however,

#fire emblem #fe3h #fire emblem three houses #fe16 #edeleth #byleth eisner #edelgard von hresvelg #edelgard #byleth x edelgard #three houses #sterge.pptx #long post warning #haven't drawn comics in a good while lol #i guess it's good practice for hourly comic day this week #really hope this makes any sense and is remotely legible #i have yet to figure out how to get stuff to look half-decent when shrunk down for tumblr #boy i sure am glad i gave byleth emotions in my fic so i can have her make the dumbest expressions known to mankind #my half-baked Lore Reason is that she's not used to using her facial muscles yet so every expression is Extreme #there's no justification for why edelgard is like this. it's just funny #yeah it's all ooc but i'm a dyke with a pencil and i can do whatever i want

[keiksy-cake]

Germany's second page from the Hetalia Collezione

Official revisions included "just like shojo manga!" to "maybe he likes cute things?", and the addition of "his casual clothes are often described as "dad-like"

all collezione pages

[Please note, I’m an amateur in Japanese and have to use various resources and translation machines to help me. If you notice a possible mistake or want clarification, please bring it up to me *politely* and not aggressively or hostile.]

#hetalia #aph hetalia #hetalia collezione #aph germany #hetalia germany #“maybe he likes cute things” ah yes you mean he loves his cute boyfriend /j #“cool older brother fantasies” the shade to prussia tho 😭 #so then it's not actually canon that prussia can shoot gilbirds from his hand that was just his own fantasy? i guess we should've known #the big “germany” could barely even fit lmao #someone said the vehicle thing is giving autism lol i agree and stan for it

[eshithepetty]

So.

This is it, mobsters.... our final stand. When the poll starts on @autismswagsummit, go....... do your part.

[Short ID: a comic pertaining to the autism swag summit, featuring Mob and Tome. Mob reveals that he feels insecure about how seriously everyone's been taking this, and how he's not sure he likes all this attention on him for it, but Tome argues and encourages him, saying that his could help him get Tsubomi's attention, since she's autistic herself, and might appreciate Mob being more confident about that. In the end, Mob brightens up, and gets pumped to win the bracket, before it's revealed that Tsubomi actually hopes Papyrus wins. End short ID]

Extended ID under cut:

[ID: a comic pertaining to the autism swag summit, featuring Mob and Tome. It's done in pink and orange tones, except for the last panel, which is purple.

First page: Mob sits down at the table in the telepathy club room, sighing. Tome, who is playing a video game and eating fries, looks at him and asks: "? What's wrong, Mob?" Mob looks to the side, eyes downcast, and says: "It's nothing really... it's just- the autism contest thing. Everyone's taking it so seriously but- idk. It feels weird. Like Mezato-san's cult thing, kinda." Tome, meanwhile, slides him the fries, and he takes one, and continues, "I don't think I like all this attention on me. Not for this." and Tome looks at him, chin on hand, and asks: "But wasn't that like, one of your main goals? To be popular?"

Second page: at this, Mob startles, and in the next panel he shrinks in as he replies "um- yeah, but. To be honest, I only wanted that to-" and shrinks even further in the next, blushing, trailing off with "to..." Behind him, there is the tapping of footsteps as Tome, off screen, rounds the desk, and makes Mob jump with a loud SLAM, and yells "LISTEN, MOB!" Then, she is looking at him with a frown, gesturing with one hand, and continues: "You need to look at this from a different perspective. What if this is the contest that winning would aid you the most? After all, isn't Takane herself autistic?" Mob, eyes wide and blushing, loudly interrupts with "S-SHE IS??"

Third page: Mob asks, "How do you know??" Tome, her arms crossed, eyes closed and a smirk on her face, says "Look. I'm autistic. You're autistic. We're ALL autistic, I know my kin, alright?" Under her breath, (under the speech bubble) she also adds "Plus I kind of heard her say "Leave me alone, I'm autistic" once," before she interrupts herself, her arms spread wide and flapping, with "but that's beside the point!" She continues in the next panel, only one of her moving hands visible as Mob looks up at her, wide-eyed, "My point is, maybe this is your chance to show her what you're all about; that you know who you are; are secure in your identity, proud of it, even!"

Fourth page: Tome crosses her arms again, a confident smirk on her face as she looks down at Mob and asks, "So tell me. What are you gonna do?" Mob, hunched in, shyly responds, ".... I'm gonna win...?" Off screen, Tome replies: "Say it with more confidence!" And Mob does, back straightening and a blush creeping in: "I- I'm gonna win!" Tome yells "Louder!", and Mob stands up, leaning on the table, yelling in response "I'm gonna WIN!!" And Tome, a fist pumped in enthusiasm, yells back "YEAH!!"

Last panel: Tome's dialogue box is cut off, as we see Tsubomi, meanwhile, laying in her bed, sucking a lollipop and phone in hand, as she thinks: "I hope papyrus wins." End ID.]

#autismsummit2023 #(this is before s3 finale if it wasn't obvious btw lol) #mob psycho 100 #mp100 #kageyama shigeo #tome kurata #tsubomi takane #art #comic #autistic swag summit #my own art #my own post #at this point i should just be known as 'that one mp100 bozo who always takes shitposts way too seriously' jsgdhdg #fun fact: originally i had tsubomi wish shadow wins but i changed it in case that becomes obsolete ;^^ #i still think she'd absolutely root for shadow tho. i feel it in my heart #also during drawing this i realized mob doesnt... really share his worries so extensively like this with anyone but reigen? #so this might be ooc i guess?? but its for a silly tumblr bracket lmao its fine i think #but yeah!!! #o7 guys this is probably my last contribution to this saga. lets hope the final battle is valiant and good natured

[hephaestuscrew]

It's so important to me that Minkowski and Eiffel and Hera spend December 25th together to celebrate Eiffel's birthday post-canon. And the hope that they spend that day together is a sentiment shared by Gabriel Urbina.

But Minkowski canonically cares about Christmas itself. Minkowski has people in her life whom she could spend Christmas with. And so there will probably have to be a difficult conversation at some point after the Hephaestus crew return to Earth, when someone says how good it will be to have Renée there for Christmas Day again. And Minkowski will have to look at her husband, or her relatives, or her in-laws - people who loved her and mourned her and celebrated upon her return from the dead - and she'll have to tell them that she won't be there on Christmas Day. And if the person who asks knows her at all, they'll see the look on her face and know that there's no negotiating to be done here.

It's not exactly that she doesn't want to celebrate Christmas with the people she used to celebrate Christmas with. But she can do that on any day near the end of December. Spending December 25th with Eiffel and Hera is something she absolutely cannot compromise on. 

The main reason she'd give for this is that December 25th is Eiffel's birthday. Whether or not it matters to him as much as it used to, Minkowski wants Eiffel's birthday to get the recognition it deserves, because it was so important to him and he never expected anyone else to care or remember.

A second reason - one she might never speak aloud - is that she's always thought that Christmas is a time for family, and nowadays that means that spending it with Eiffel and Hera feels right to her.

But I think there's a third, perhaps equally important, reason underneath those two. Maybe she doesn't admit it to herself consciously, but I think part of Minkowski believes that the only people who can really understand the complicated way she now feels about December 25th are the two people who were there with her when everything went to hell on Christmas Day.

It was December 25th when they realised they'd made contact with aliens, and when Hilbert locked Minkowski outside the airlock and tried to incapacitate Eiffel and tore out Hera's personality hardware, and when everything Minkowski had thought she knew about the Hephaestus mission fell apart.

How can she exchange gifts with people for whom it isn't the anniversary of the one of the worst days of their life? How can she gather round a Christmas tree with people who've never feared for their lives at the hands of Alexander Hilbert and Goddard Futuristics? How can she eat turkey and trimmings with people who weren't there when the Christmas dinner was never eaten because there was a murderous mutiny from one of the intended guests? How can she spend December 25th with people for whom it's never been a day of betrayal and fear and loss and uncertainty eight lightyears away from Earth?

Eiffel doesn't remember that awful Christmas and that brings its own kind of pain for Minkowski. But he was there, and so was Hera, and so (no matter what anyone else expects) Minkowski needs to be with them on that complicated day.

#Wolf 359 #w359 #Renée Minkowski #Renee Minkowski #I wrote this intending to schedule it to post on Christmas Day #but I'm kidding myself if I think I can do delayed gratification like that #I have to post things as soon as I write them #so you're getting it now #Apologies if it's too early in December for Christmas-related posting #I guess I'll reblog it on Christmas Day instead #I nearly fucked up this post by mentioning Christmas traditions that I don't think are celebrated in the US #But luckily I remembered just in time that Christmas crackers are not universal among Christmas-celebrators #I almost mentioned charades but idk if that has Christmas associations in the US or even if it's widely known #I do think Minkowski would absolutely love Charades though #if she played with people on the same wavelength as her that is #Eiffel would be trying to act out very specific scenes from films Minkowski has not seen and she'd get so annoyed lol #wolf 359 spoilers #w359 spoilers #the empty man posteth

[liquidstar]

and now for something stupid

#but really i also just wanted to play around w this sort of coloring style bc its been FOREVER since ive used it #and i think i can make it look better now #AND i think i can make more sillay stuff like this and not have it take as long w cleaning up lines #anyway now you all understand the terrible dynamic between these three #phobo's infodump text is just copypasted from the wikipedia page for knives. #julliet ALSO uses knives is the thing so hes actually mansplaining < JOKE #he just wants to share. even if it gives her a headache. but he wouldnt mansplain he doesnt have it in him. hes ok with felonies tho #but julis life hasnt known peace since she was told to take care of the newbies #and shes ALSO a newbie (just slightly less so) so really this is probably just tartarus hazing her #theyd take one look at the two disorganized unserious overeager newbies and think ''you know what would be fucking hilarious'' #and pass them onto the neurotic slightly-less-newbie who takes everything as seriously as possible. disaster combination. #i cannot stress enough that this is a group of bandits and murderers theyre NOT above hazing. #deimos actually is doing the best job at it since he is stealing as we speak #i mean hes not supposed to do it to his teammates but still. on the right track #as for the dynamic between deimos and phobos themselves its like. theyre just bros. theyre both pretty similar in personality #except deimos is kinda more mean and cynical while phobos can be kinda. dense and naive despite literally where hes at in life #but most of the time theyre basically beavis and butthead #i would also like to stress that juli is not being homophobic she just already cannot stand these guys and cant believe the audacity #but. complete misunderstanding. karma for stealing wallets ig #this will never be cleared up by anyone ever #but again thats not their dynamic they are just beavis and butthead. and i guess that makes juli daria LOL #finn's ocs #finn's art

[mildcicada]

#when i was first coloring him in he was gonna be golden chinchilla colored but then i was like ehhh jonah magnus should be red/orange but #elias should be gray ...so i just desaturated what i already did instead of recoloring lol but #he is now supposed to be shaded silver lol #but thats why his coat pattern is on the darker side compared to what it *should* be #og elias bouchard coming from an important/roch family and while whole thing with thinking he just *deserves* stuff bc of his upbringing. #etc. -> he is purebred and matches the breed standards etc for a scottish fold of his color #obviously the eye color doesn't matter because. ahaha #i thought elias fit the Scottish fold vibes because: Scottish folds are known for looking sort of like owls and having intense eyes #and the cat body/face type (also present in british shorthairs) to me gives off sort of... unnasumming vibes? #like ahaha yes i am a boring boss who loves paperwork look at how unnasumming i am season 1-2 elias y'know #trying to think of what cat breed jonah would be. and also jon gerry etc you know all the other characters i like #would it be boring to have multiple british shorthairs #i mean.. #Michael shelley/distortion is a laperm that's all I know #i didn't particularly care with the personality attributes associated with eliascat because it didn't need to fit his personality on account #of not being his original body. but i do try to keep in mind the best personality/look/etc. cat attributes as a whole for a character #also sometimes get obsessed with jt making historical and geographical sense but then it just limits me greatly to a point im not into it #so i don't care about specific breeds in that respect lol #tma #my art #elias bouchard #the magnus archives #some notes looking back(made it 2 hours ago but still looking back ok..) on it now are that i feel like elias would never choose this breed #for his next bodyhop because of the inherent health issues in scottish folds. I saw the breed was created in like the early 1960s and #assumed that maybe the health issues wouldn't have been common knowledge until later enough for jonah to be unaware of them but actually no #there's legislation about it like 6 years later LOL so jonah would..maybe not make this choice #i guess in the future when drawing i will just make him a British shorthair #my catTMA is simultaneously 'they are just regular cats or like all show cats or something' and 'exact tma plot but as intelligent cats' #LOL its just vague in my mind idk..also maybe jon can be an Abyssinian #ALSO WHAT WAS I THINKING 'jonah may not have been aware about x thing' like did i...did i forget. me 2 hours ago was dumb as rocks

[autailome]

jwqs has already blown up beyond any of the 2020-1s twitter fans wildest expectations but if it ever truly breaks containment and becomes mainstream on tumblr ill really be so happy

#e #greatest lesbian love story of all time literally #destined enemies .......... #jwqs #the story just deserves to be more well known maybe the donghua will help it get there #the 300 chapters are a lot to ask of people i guess #ugh qi yan and jingnu are just like some of the best female characters of all time #like i want them to break containment here bc then if i see them get completely ignored ill know forreal everyones just lying lol #abt not being able to enjoy female characters bc blah blah reasons #qi yan is literally just like any other blorbo meow meow whatever on here so she should rightfully be a sensation

[goldlightsaber]

I find it interesting that Jesse Armstrong and others refer to Roman Roy as a "playboy" and say that he "goes back to being a playboy" in the finale cause like....where? I feel like Roman is someone that just wants everyone to think he's a playboy and "drowning in pussy", when he is clearly...not? Time and time again, it's been shown that he can't really fuck a woman and can go quite a long time without doing so. Unless you count what happens with Gerri as sex. To me it has always seemed that he is simply posturing as the kind of man who is capable of "getting pussy", that he is exhibiting a performative joy in objectifying them and fucking on the regular, and that he makes his statements disgusting enough that people don't want to pry into the truth of it any further. And what effect does that achieve, other than to be closer to whatever version of masculinity Logan might've deemed best? Or the closest version Roman is capable of achieving? What Roman lacks in corporate ambition and focus, he makes up for in exaggerated, lewd sex talk. It achieves the effect of making him seem preoccupied with sex, just the way a "normal," testosterone-oozing man would. But as we know, he is actually having very little. This is all to say, "Playboy where?"

#roman roy #succession #do any of y'all see him as a playboy because i sure as fuck do not #he says 'oh yeah i'd fuck that in a minute' and then just...doesn't. lmao #and no player/playboy/womanizer/fuckboy i've ever known seems capable of lasting very long (no pun intended) without hooking up #the whole essence of being a playboy/fuckboy is using women for your personal benefit. to finish. and then discard them #and move on to the next #meanwhile roman like. lives with women. doesn't fuck them. ever. and then develops an emotional (repressed) attachment to the one woman #that does actually get him off lol. #a true playboy would kill themselves before ever making an attachment like that lmao #ANYWAY! #idk why im in the mood for this tonight i guess i just have a lot of opinions on this i guess #i think they tried to WRITE him to be a playboy. and then kieran's performance just...turned that shit around #into something far more interesting #text

[hermitcraftx]

Why the FUCK are Southerners under the impression they're even welcomed on the internet ANYMORE????? Sorry but this is genuinely fucking rancid I feel fucking unsafe knowing that my spaces are being invaded by you fucking people. Fucking disgusting that it's 2024 and we can't hold piece of shit racists and Confederate nazis accountable for literal fucking war crimes and slavery anymore.

hey man. whats going on. this is such a weird thing to say to someone else on the internet life would be so beautiful if you stepped outside and talked to a real person for once. btw did you know the south is mostly full of poor people and black people and acting as if being from a place makes a person inherently a bigot is very weird almost as if it's pushing a classist narrative. Thats so wacky lol

#sorry i got this out on discord #but other parts of america love to pin ALLLL of their bigotry and crimes on the south. racism misogyny homophobia etc #so they dont have to reflect on themselves and do introspection as to what theyre doing wrong. bc make no mistake its rampant other places #<- europe does this with america too. lol. lmfao #but other places love to act like they're educating or modernizing or fixing the south when they just. want to turn it into where they #came from. when they move here and buy up all the cheap land and skyrocket prices and chop down huge swathes of forest #to build solar panels for 'eco friendly energy' despite THOUSANDS of acres of wood lost. #and its so weird that a lot of these attitudes about being better than them inherently and being lesser human beings are pushed in every ot #er area of the country. its almost as if its long rooted classism and racism #there are queer people living in the south. trans people. people of color. you cant just tell us all to leave to be redeemed #we deserve to live safe lives AND not have to leave behind everything we've ever known. what if we dont have the money?? #but i guess you dont care abt that. lol. Lmfao #jamies bad posts #jamie answers asks #hate anon #jamies serious posts

[sporesgalaxy]

wait i lied . i need to tell you that the funniest symptom of ehlers danlos syndrome is "velvety skin." my joints are weird as hell but my skin is so soft. but in a weird way so watch out!

#adddna #ok now sleep for real i prommy #also found out my moms known i was hyperflexible by professional medicals educated guess this whole time (since elementary) #and just like. never really explained this much to me and either forgot or never looked up the other problems caused by ehlers danlos?????? #and then my new pediatrist was like yo. ehlers danlos is why your feet are like that. and i was like huh??? theres a fucking reason??? #amd when i got home i was like mom did we know this?? and she was like yeah. and im like. man what #*PODiatrist. ugh. anyways shoutout to my podiatrist for being like 'google thisnplease please please. also youd be a great swimmer lol'

[meatriarch]

overview cont. i guess lmao. no one asked but its been something in the back of my mind for a while now & i got an anon tonight telling me i come off intimidating and i feel the need to just. make note of some things so that hopefully if anyone feels a certain way with how i run this blog then like. know and understand both my side as well as that my dms / disc is open for anyone to pop into -- just obv depends on the headspace at the time.

i know this is long & am sorry if it doesnt make sense but. just setting it gently out there.

but, again, my disc ( same as my url ) is open for any mutual. its open to shoot the shit. open for plotting. open for memes. what have you. i may not always get to every message. i may not be in the headspace for certain things or certain energies. but its open for anyone as long as we are mutuals & if handles are different between here & disc then i just get a heads-up abt who you are so i know lmao

likewise, i am fairly fucking slow writing-wise and alot of that is because of offsite issues chipping into me but also because most, if not all, of the things i DO have in the inbox or drafts are from my affiliates at this time ( tho i do have some more from the archive i need to move over from a couple people ). alot of my spoons and drive to write and post is because of the dynamics and plotting built between our muses. im not a blog centered on plotting but, it does help to have a better idea on how to navigate between muses c: esp for those technically outside of my kiddos' texas canon obviously. that being said, anyone is welcome to like any inbox calls i put out there. and my inbox is always open and accepting, even if i havent reblogged prompts in a while -- i have my tag linked on my pinned and its available always & for whomever. it just comes with the understanding that i may take a while to respond to them & they may not get as expansive as some of my posts can get with my affiliates; which again, is just simply from how much we've been building together that helps with that!

on that note. my connections with my texas pals are very dear to me. both ic & ooc. as i noted in my overview post, i talk about the dynamics we've built openly and freely here because theyre so integral to my portrayals. they & their kiddos have my entire heart and i unapologetically love having fun with them and going on tangents with them and bouncing thoughts off of each others posts on the dash.

my experiences in other corners of tumby rp have not been particularly kind. and its been a long time since ive felt comfortable especially ooc with writing partners. and i understand if i may come across closed off or intimidating or unapproachable. i understand if i also come across partial to them / play favorites because frankly... i am. i do. thats because they've built bonds not just between characters but also with me. ill be very transparent and say that i am very particular in who i get close with and that translates into here too. but thats also just something that easily can also happen with literally anyone. again i do understand if i come across closed off in any sense but genuinely? im not scary and i have options open for continuing to grow more connections with people c: theyre open always. what im not going to do, however, purely out of personal experience is chase after interactions. the last fandoms i wrote in i did so and it wore me down into my last hiatus. i will show equal enthusiasm to whats given. but i wont fish for it, either. its just not my cup of tea.

i like to think im fairly patient and understanding in a lot, probably moreso than i should in some cases -- sincerely though if theres issues know that im fine with it being brought up. but im also not going to be welcoming nor tolerate my boundaries being disregarded or disrespected, im already dealing with that with an offsite friend. not dealing with it here. i do not like feeling so uncomfortable existing on my own blog or in my own disc. and i get that already with my personal disc & this offsite friend in particular. im not dealing with it here too.

which on that note, i also wont be receptive with issues regarding what i post, what i talk about, who i write with, who i choose as affiliates or mains or w/e. my blog & my dash are my safe & comfort zones and these muses often help me alot with navigating when my headspace is at a fucked up level. if any of that is a concern yes youre welcome to come to me and talk it over but end of the day? my comfort & mental state is a priority to me. if thats ever an issue i truly would just recommend you do what you feel is best for you. everyone existing on this hell-plane are entitled on curating their space in whatever manner they see fit.

again. i promise im not scary. im not an ass. but i do curate my space to be in my best interest and at my age & experience across the 10+ yrs ive been rping on and off here, ive seen alot, heard alot, experienced alot. i do apologize however if i do come across unapproachable or intimidating. i do apologize if i seem closed off to only a select few. i dont mind if you follow / we're mutuals solely just to keep up with what i write! thats completely okay too and i thank those who are <3 but if i seem unapproachable i literally just gently gesture again to my disc or prompts tag etc! i welcome any to get to know myself or my muses. regardless of how much time has passed since following one another. just again, comes with the understanding that my social battery & headspace often does work against me. and thats not personal against anyone, ever.

#[ 𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘦. ] ── * psa. #im hoping this all reads fine and w/e cause im fist-fighting with a headache rn but. #just to hopefully idk. make a few things known? i guess? transparency a bit? again i promise im not a scary person lol but i am just. #careful with alot of avenues. and i get this post is also fairly rigid in tone most of the way but im. pretty tuckered out by alot #and being known as like... intimidating is something i have personal issues with re: old friends offsite. so. trying to state what i mean #as direct hopefully as possible.

[r0semultiverse]

WAIT- is this one of the alternate timelines created from the space-time sword ("Shintō Amenogozen")!? 👀

I'm an anime-only bsd enjoyer & ever since that damn sword popped up after Atsushi & Akutagawa killed him on the boat but he was able to erase/undo(?) that timeline, I've been thinking that technically means there's multiple timelines. This would be the one where Fukuchi won that conflict we just saw or something else entirely is going on given the way he's dressed (if that even is him)! 👀👀👀

#plz no spoilers I want to watch it without knowing whats going on yet; I think it absolutely has to do with multiple timelines though since #Fukuchi got absolutely folded from our POV. Also his legs in the future looked robotic??? maybe just lighting & art style; but something #isnt quite right about that guy; he's also FLYING??? like HUH??? what is going on??? absolutely wild... looks like an angel too 👀 #I just hope this hiatus won't be multiple years long & force me to rewatch the whole series all over again just to understand whats going o #mind you; I don't exactly have a twitter to keep watch on series & anime announcements & things so I guess just tag me when we get a season #announcement and release date I guess?? just let me know. Adhd & series going on hiatus is not a good combo LOL #genuinely had to rewatch for this season because I only found out that it was going on through someone I follow reblogging a gifset & not #even tagging it. LOL like I could have just not known or gone the whole season without knowing since it's a more niche anime #okay I think I've rambled enough in the tags to get this post to show up in the search engine PLZ NO SPOILING the series for me btw #I will block liberally 👀 #mine #op #bungo stray dogs #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd spoilers #bsd anime #bungou stray dogs anime #bungo stray dogs spoilers #live blogging

[soft5ku11]

A few more asks, rapid-fire style

#my art #gzm tag #soft5ku11 ask guzma #please dont send me fart stuff in future thank you B) #if you're that anon its all chill i got no beef w it i just wanna make that known that i dont like it #also first appearance of plumeria on this blog i think lol #plm tag #i guess we'll keep track of her too (she will not be getting fat though sorry to the large woman enjoyers)

[guideaus]

but to be serious, i dont think "hikaru" from hgsn is necessarily "bad" for multiple reasons

when i first started it, i thought it really did just jump right into revealing "hikaru" wasnt yoshiki's old friend, "hikaru" flat out did not protest the accusation or even yoshiki's thought of him not being hikaru. i thought it couldve been drawn out a bit like showing whatever made yoshiki identify that he is different after he went missing, but it just goes into pretty much showing that yoshiki's right, this isnt really hikaru

and he does this which i originally thought was funnily quick to reveal

and the pilot/ch0 outright tells you he kinda like seeps/leaks out when hes upset (though itd be cool if i didnt know this beforehand)

but yoshiki is like "yeah, fine, i guess...", so then later "hikaru" tries to continue acting normally, but more sheepishly after being exposed

with casually talking abt how and what he can do as something that's not human

and then inappropriately reacts to what yoshiki isnt used to, therefore is afraid of

but gets upset if he's strongly rejected, especially concerning his inhuman qualities

leading to his worst outburst

but yoshiki is his favorite person, so he doesnt act on killing him

then just about his other main feeling is shame. he's recognized that yoshiki used to be open with hikaru, but has begun keeping secrets with "hikaru", he has a nightmare of yoshiki abandoning him specifically because of what he is

but he was more willing to kill the old woman and even their friend bc they werent as important, once again having his emotions based around fear; not knowing how to react and not acting before talking things out first. his actions are primarily immature uncomfortable feelings because he doesnt know any better and is fearing the worst.

the two end up having another aggressive conflict over this, yoshiki spiralling instead and asking hikaru to kill him if he cant die, and the important part is hikaru choosing to acknowledge what he did was apparently wrong and showing that he can't in the future, since hikaru was also evasive about his actions earlier. its built off earlier when he said he wanted to be less "ugly" (showing he was insecure abt his monstrous qualities), but also not immediately freaking out, showing hes working on himself

also sharing how yoshiki's previous actions affected him personally in a positive way as well, which moves yoshiki and at least for now he decides to go back to being with him. hikaru isnt intentionally like trying to cause everyone around him pain or anything lol, the story is fairly transparent with hikaru's feelings.

itd be a different story entirely if "hikaru" reacted in a way to gaslight him about it maybe or something similar, but i think just him "disarming" himself and literally putting half his life in yoshiki's hands and going out of his way to be honest is something. he's told yoshiki multiple times he isnt the same mentally, so he cant really be held to the same standards. yoshiki also ends up accepting his actions as well.

i think the first chapter so quickly showing hikaru being inhuman was a good representation of his mental state and how its changing through the story. i dont think he was bad originally, but he doesnt want to be, either

#personal #hgsn spoilers #the summer hikaru died #hgsn #manga #idk i feel like it shouldnt even be said but i guess i am fhsdhds #also i think regardless of if he did or didnt do smth bad... he doesnt know shit #how do u hold smth to expectations its never known huh #also sorry i went back and forth between saying hikaru and 'hikaru' i got lazy lol #i didnt mention it but theres a lot of gay coding in it as well. i dont think its 'gay person feels like a monster (so they are)' but more #focusing on homophobia existing

[fallenfawnn]

..

#saw a psychiatrist for the very first time earlier this week #it was like.. fine? idk.. is just weird #i feel like i can never say what i want to say how i want to say it and i feel like i forget so much and get so fawn-response at the doctor #idkkkk #he told me i have BPD which like okay i mean no surprise to me i have known i for the criteria for 10 years now lol #but for some reason that being the first thing he landed on annoyed me lol #especially after he told me i don’t meet criteria for PTSD which fine i guess.. it’s wayy more CPTSD which isn’t a diagnosis here sooooo #anyways anyways #i hope in the future maybe i have the courage to bring up autism but like.. eh. #in this first appt he already seemed confused by why i was struggling so much to take care of myself but can maintain #my high-demand technical ‘smart person’ job #to which i said that is the *only* thing i can maintain at the detriment to everything else in my life #anywaysssss #i just cant tell if i were to bring up autism if he would be the type to “’i have a masters degree and maintain a job and AFAB so no’ #‘it’s just the BPD’ #as if bpd and complex trauma and autism don’t all intensely overlap and hold hands lol #ANYWAYS #first ate i guess is at least i have a psychiatrist now #and m proud of myself for that and for going

[spider-man-2o99]

Just wanted to say that I have been thinking of you and pre-emptively empathizing with the nonsense you are no doubt being flooded with and the psychic damage it must be causing. Keep stanning the king ignore the weirdos <3

thankg u.,, i feel like ive been trapped in a fuckign . Torture Labyrinth these past coupl days . but. wwe will. We Will Yet Persist onwards w/ our hand on the left wall till we;re either out or at the center i swear 2 fucking GOD,

#talking tag #asks #th pain is forever the Horrors r unending the lack of media comprehension on all sides is Disappointin But Also My Goddamn Life I Guess lol #though i will say ppl in my inbox have actually been.. surprisingly polite overall? if not outright rather kind as a whole. um. post-atsv. #but. god. i have not Talked About so much of that movie because i kind of just. #..ok actually i realize this is gonna sound rude as hell lmao. but. hhaha i Kinda Just. was fool enough to Assume that everbody would yknow #like. Comprehend The Film yk yk yk. since it is a well-written movie that doesnt try to Hide any of what it;s abt? yk? #i come On Here onto tumblr dot bumblr and i make my stupid esoteric gddamn complaints abt 2099 Themes for Me Only so my head doesnt blow up #n silly ol me i really do like earnestly honestly in my Heart think. like. we all saw the same movie. right? mayb thingsll calm down. #but oh oh oh oh oh no no no No No. they do Not calm down they get So Much Worse. #and now hypothetical Internet Strangers might be Passing Judgement bcuz we look like an Apologist 4 assuming Everyone Knew Media Literacy #CHRIST. do people think i think mig was. like. In The Right. in atsv. no ive known he would be Wrong for years dudes. #why do yall think i was so low-key Disappointed he was placed in a role that couldve better suited. like. Superior Spider-Man. #public image. DING-DONGs. man he is Never Going To Be In Movies Again After This Hes An AU SPIDER-MAN FROM THE 90S. LORD! #i had SO MUCH FUN watching atsv!!!!!!!!!!!!! #i dont like the choices it made to put miguel in the situation that it did. Bizarre Thematic Changes to 2099 that Only I Care Abt. but like #that is SUCH a fuckin SMALL and insanely autistic nitpick like i earnestly loved the hell out of the film and its mig is-- #--Earnestly One Of His Better/Best Adaptations despite bein within the limited confines of th plot nd setting he is In & w/o his inner mono #..i just. Hate So Much That This Movies Version Of Miguel Will Be The Only One That Anybody Knows For The Next Seven Years At Least. yknow. #i lov watching that fuckers trainwreck of a slowmotion mental breakdown for two hours but the movie gave practically Zero Context 2 newbies #BTSV please save me BTSV please save me BTSV PLEASE save me PLEASE please please please PLEASE BTSV youre my last hope.... #(arthur clenching his fist meme) ppl r Already so shitty 2 ppl w/ Messy Symtptoms i could Handle losing MK but SM2099 means too much 2 me..