#i genuinely don't know what to tell you i'm at a loss of words me and you both

[cherrycola27]

Red Wine, Fall into me

Warnings: Language, Alcohol consumption, Smut. 18+ (Phoenix x Female Reader) banner by the wonderful @thedroneranger Fic inspired by the Chappell Roan song "Red Wine Supernova"

...........................................

You know they say not to waste a Friday night on a first date.

Yet, here you were, in a nice dress, walking into a cocktail bar, to meet some guy, from some app, on a Friday night for a first date. You'd spent a ridiculous amount of time doing your hair, makeup, and picking out the perfect outfit that was the right balance of "I'm a good girl," and "I just might let you take me home if you play your cards right."

You texted your date that you were there and that you'd be at the bar. You were there a few minutes before your agreed upon time, so you walked up to the bar top, which had a middle-aged couple at one end, and a pretty dark-haired brunette at the other.

You took a seat a few stools down from her and ordered a glass of merlot from the bartender. He sat it down quickly in front of you as you checked your phone to see if your date had responded to your text. You felt immediately defeated to see that it still had not been read.

A few minutes ticked by, and it was now the time you and your date had set to meet. You fired off another text asking if he was there, with no response. Several minutes later, you sent one asking if he was on his way and nothing. Finally, a full thirty minutes and a second glass of wine later, he sent you a message saying that something came up, and he wouldn't make it.

You huffed as you sat your phone down on the counter and groaned. Of course, this would happen to you. This was the last time you agreed to a date from an app.

You sighed and finished the last sip of wine in your glass and rummaged through your purse for your card. Before you could pull it out, though, you heard a soft voice speak. "Put her last two on my tab, and bring us another round if you don't mind."

You look up and see the pretty brunette from earlier handing her card over and taking a seat next to you. "Thank you, but you don't have to do that." You smile at her. "I know, but I want to." She smiles back at you, extending her hand for you to shake, "I'm Natasha, by the way. What's your name?"

You tell her your name, and she repeats it back, slowly, savoring every syllable of it like it's a fine wine. You don't think your name has ever sounded as good as it does coming out of her mouth.

"So, what's a pretty little thing like you doing here all alone?" She asks you. "I was supposed to have a date but—he stood me up." You sigh. "His loss is my gain then." Natasha says as she brings her own wine glass up to her lips. You blush at her words.

"What about you?" You fire back at her. "I just wanted a nice quiet night out, away from the crowds. Somewhere that I could relax and make a new—friend." She winks at you and slides her stool closer to yours.

"So, tell me about yourself." She says, and she rests her foot on the bottom of your stool. Your thighs part just enough to accommodate her toned leg that's exposed from the slit in her dress.

A shiver runs down your spine as you tell her about your job and some of your friends and what you like to do for fun. Her eyes stayed glued to yours, and she nods and questions and seems genuinely interested in you. "What about you?" You ask her when you finish.

"I'm in the Navy. I'm an aviator." She says as if it's the most casual thing in the world.

"Oh. So I guess you're used to going fast and doing what you want then." You smirk at her. "I can go fast." She says as she leans into your space. "But—" she sighs as she places her hand on your thigh. "—I actually have a partner in the backseat that I have to listen to, so I'm very good at taking directions. And, there are so many controls in the cockpit, that I have to be excellent with precision." She breathes out.

Natasha leans in closer to you. "I've always been amazing and zeroing in on my target and finishing the job. She whispers in your ear before pulling back. You swallow thickly and shift in your seat, unable to ignore the wetness pooling between your thighs and the heat that you feel in your belly that isn't from the wine.

"Is that so?" You say, cocking your head to the side. "Now, what exactly would one have to do if they want to see these skills in action?" You pry. "I think after a few glasses of wine and a dance or two, I might be convinced. Care to find out?" A crimson smile curls at her lips as she extends her hand to you.

You nod your head and slip your hand in hers. She places her palm on the small of your back, just a tad too low to be considered decent as she guides you to the dance floor. She presses closer to you to avoid the other people already there. You can smell her perfume. Floral and spicy with a hint of sweet. It is so intoxicating that it makes your head spin more than any glass of wine ever could.

Natasha drags you directly to the middle of the dance floor amongst all the other couples. She spins you around and presses your back to her front. There is absolutely no space between the two of you, and you can feel every soft curve of her body pressed against yours.

You sway to the beat of some song you don't know as her hands skim up and down your arms before resting on your hips. She pulls your hair over one of your shoulders and rests her chin on your newly exposed skin. You shiver as she places a gentle, fleeting kiss on your shoulder. You feel the blush in your cheeks spread all over your body.

"You okay there, pretty girl?" Natasha asks you. "Y—yeah." You stammer out. "Just a little warm is all."

"Why don't we go get some air." She whispers hotly in your ear. Her breathy voice has you weak in the knees. You nod your head in agreement, unable to trust your own voice.

It's quieter outside. So quiet you can hear your heartbeat racing in your ears as the two of you make your way to a secluded spot on the far side of the deck. The fresh salty air fills your lungs as you try to take a deep breath to calm yourself. You lean against the deck railing and watch the waves roll in as the moonlight dances across the dark ocean.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Natasha says as she comes to stand beside you. "It's breathtaking." You say as you turn to face her. "It's not the only breathtaking thing out here." She says, looking you directly in the eye. "No, it's not." You counter.

You inhale deeply as she takes a step forward and places on and on your hip, drawing you closer to her. She uses her free hand to brush a few stray strands of your hair away before cupping your face and pulling you closer to her.

Her lips are pillowy soft when they connect with yours. Her hand slides to the back of your hair, tangling in your locks to hold you in place. You wrap both of your arms around her neck as she trails her tonuge across the seam of your lips, asking for permission to deepen the kiss.

You gladly grant her access, and you moan as her tongue caresses yours. The kiss is sweet, with the last drops of your wine still on each other's mouths.

You moan and lean into her when you feel her fingers dig into your hip. She takes a step closer and pushes your back against the metal deck rail, her lips never leaving yours as her kisses become more hungry, more demanding.

She pulls her mouth away from yours, and you gasp as she trails her perfect pout across your chin and jaw before grazing your ear lobe with her teeth. You inhale sharply, and it's like music to Natasha's ears.

She continues her assault, trying to draw even more new sounds from you. Her lips skim over the sensitive flesh of your neck. You find yourself arching towards her, silently begging her for more. You feel her smile against you before she carefully grazes her teeth over the sensitive flesh before pulling back and laving it with her tongue. She repeats the action and your hand tangles in her dark strands, holding her in place. She chuckles and continues to work the space between your shoulder and ear, surely leaving a few dark marks behind, but you don't care. You want her to mark you up—claim you as hers.

You draw her mouth back to yours and kiss her until you're breathless. She pulls back and her lips are swollen, and her cheeks are red.

"I don't normally do this, y'know." You confess to her.

"Neither do I." She tells you truthfully.

You heave a sigh of relief. "I don't think I've ever done this, actually. But there's something about you that's—magical." You say as you bite down on your lower lip and bat your eyes at her.

"If you think I'm magic here, you should let me take you home. I've got a wand and a rabbit that I can show you all kinds of tricks with." She smirks at you.

................

A few minutes later, the two of you are in the back of an Uber going to Natasha's place. Her hand rests brazenly on your upper thigh, and her nimble fingers are tracing deft patterns across your skin. You squim in your seat, trying to keep yourself calm, when really, all you want to do is plant yourself in her lap and kiss her again.

The two of you somehow make it up the small path that leads to her front door. She unlocks it and pulls you in. Once the door is shut and she's clicked the lock, she pushes you up against it and kisses you roughly. You meet her kisses with passion. Both sets of your hands roam over each other, desperately.

Natasha has enough sense to practically drag you into her bedroom. You stand there a little awkwardly until she comes up behind you and slowly unzips you dress. Her lips trace your spine, leaving faint, wine colored kisses from her leftover lipstick on your flesh.

The garment drops to the floor, and you turn around to face her. She admires how your nipples are peaked and perky with anticipation. The scrap of lace, that could barely be called underwear, that you chose to wear tonight has an obvious dark spot on it. "Such a shame you date didn't get to see this." Natasha breathes out as she lightly grazes the front of it.

You shiver, and she lets out a breathy laugh. You reach for her, catching her wrist and pulling her to you. Your hands reach for her zipper. "Fair is fair." You mumble against her lips as she lets you pull it down before tugging the fabric off of her.

"Lay dow for me, pretty girl." Natasha says when she's kicked her dress to the side and shimmied out of her underwear. You take a moment to take in her form as you slip if your own panties.

Her dark hair falls gracefully over her shoulders. Her breasts are perky and lovely. She has a neatly shaved landing strip that draws your eyes to where you most want to be.

You lay back on her bed, making yourself comfortable on her pillows. Your breathing is shallow as her eyes rake over you.

"You're so fucking beautiful." She says as she crawls towards you. Beautiful. Not pretty, not hot, beautiful. You love how she talks about you. How she makes you feel seen.

"Thank you." You say before you can even think about it. She laughs as she reaches into her nightstand and pulls out the wand and rabbit that she mentioned earlier.

She sets them to the side before gently straddling your hips. She leans down to kiss you. Slowly, this time, it's more deliberate and precise. The two of you let your hands roam over each other's body. She tweaks your nipples, rolling them between her fingers and your arch toward her touch.

Not to be outdone, you wrap your lips around one of her peaks, and she lets out a gorgeous breathy moan that has your heart racing. She whines when you release the flesh with a soft pop but groans and leans into you when you repeat the action on the other. She subtly grinds her hips against you, seeking friction to relieve the ache between her thighs. You grab her thighs and help guide her, and she hums before stopping and sliding off of you.

"Mmm, not yet beautiful. There will be time for that. Let me take care of you first." She smiles at you. You huff a little, but don't protest. Natasha trails her lips across your breasts and chest and down your stomach. She circles her tongue around your navel before placing a kiss on your cunt, right about your clit.

You sigh as you sink deeper into her pillows, inhaling more of her intoxicating scent from earlier. She carefully parts your thighs and slots herself between them.

She grabs your left leg, and feathers kisses up from your knee towards your center and back down, a few times before switching to the right. She's taking her time building you up. And just when you think you are going to burst from her teasing, she places a fleeting kiss on your clit. You squeal and rock your hips upward, chasing her mouth.

She does it again, gently parting your folds with the delicate tip of her tongue, circling the sensitive bud and sucking it into her mouth.

She laps at your core, drinking in the taste of you, bringing you closer and closer to the edge. Wanton moans leave your mouth, and your chest heaves. One of your hands tightly fists her sheets, the other curling on her hair to hold her right where you want her. You squeeze your eyes shut and throw your head back as pure ecstacy washes over you when you cum.

Natasha works you through it until you push her head away. You lean up on your elbows and meet her eyes. She has a satisfied grin on her face. "How was that?" She asks almost cockily.

"Fantastic." You reply breathlessly. "I'm not done with you yet." She tells you as she reaches for her wand. You swallow and spread your legs for her.

She turns it on a low setting and starts by rubbing it over your nipples and down your body to get you used to the sensation. Slowly, she lowers it to your clit. You jump, still sensitive from your first orgasm, but you relax as she circles it around you bundle of nerves.

You feel one of her slender fingers circle around your entrance. "So fucking wet. All this for me, pretty girl?" She asks you. "Yes." You breathe out. You're jilted by a smack to your cunt. "Say my name, pretty girl. Tell me who's got you like this? Who got your pretty pussy absolutely dripping?" She commands.

"You—you did, Natasha. It's all for you." You babble out. She's satisfied with your answer and rewards you by sinking not one, but two of her long digits inside you and curling them upwards. You cry out her name as she finds your gspot impossibly fast. It should be a crime at how well she already knows your body as she strokes it with the perfect amount of speed and pressure.

She gages each sound you make and adjusts the wand on your clit and her fingers in your cunt. You have to give it to her, she wasn't lying when she said she could take directions.

Your head thrashes from side to side, and you're babbling out her name as she brings you closer to a second orgasm. Your toes curl against the mattress and you bite your bottom lip in an effort to keep your sounds at bay.

Natasha immediately tells you to be loud for her, and you're too for gone, and she has you so damn pliant that you'd do anything for her right now. So you release your lip and scream her name as you cum, gripping her fingers tightly, never wanting them to leave you.

When she does pull them out, you whine at the loss of contact, but it's short lived, because Natasha is crawling up your body and tapping her fingers on your lips.

You obediently open your mouth and close them around her digits, dutifully cleaning them for her. You groan at the taste of you on her hands. Once you've cleaned her, you pull off with a pop and kiss her. Your tongues meld together as you pull her onto of you.

You cradle her head and hook your legs around her waist and flip her under you. "Mine turn." You giggled as she looks up at you, bewildered. "Okay, then." She smiles down at you.

You cup each of her breasts in your hands and roll her nipples between your fingers. She lets out a small gasp as you kiss the tops of her breasts and the valley between them before continuing your journey south. You leave wet kisses across her hip bones and suck a dark mark into her right one, a little reminder of you for later.

You don't tease her like she teased you. You're too impatient. You've been dreaming about what she tasted like ever since you watched her bring that first glass of red wine to her lips this evening.

You tenderly part of folds before licking a long, broad stripe from her opening to her clit.

Natasha arches up off the bed, her hands flying to the sheets, clutching them for dear life. You repeated the motion over again before hooking one of her thighs over your shoulder. She's much more squirmy than you expected.

You work her over and over, tongue diving into her her sopping wet opening, nose bumping her clit.

She cries out your name, fingers in your hair, as you blindly reach for her other toy from earlier. You silently cheer as your hand wraps around her rabbit vibrator.

You turn it on and pull your mouth away from her. Natasha groans at the loss of contact but whimpers when she feels the tip of the vibe at her entrance. You push it in slowly until it is fully seated in her tight, wet, perfect cut.

She lets out a shaky breath as you slowly withdraw the toy and push it back it. You repeat the motion, picking up speed with each thrust. Soon, her hips are meeting it, and the sounds of lewd, wet fucking mixed with cries of your name are bouncing off her walls.

"Guess you had a few tricks up your sleeve, too." She laughs and rolls on top of you and sits up she slides down your body until you can feel her warm pussy right above yours.

Her walls grip the toy tightly, and her voice rises in pitch as she cums hard for you, back arching so hard that you're afraid she might hurt herself. "Fucking magical," you praise her as she comes down from her high. You slide up beside her on the bed. She's panting, trying to catch her breath.

"Think you have one more in you, pretty girl?" She asks you. "Yes, ma'am." You reply. She smiles at you before drawing you up to her lips.

She kisses you tenderly, rocking your hips together, creating a delicious friction between your clits. Your previous orgasms have both of you so wet, that you glide along each other with ease.

Your fingers dig into her thighs as you help guide her, pulling her tighter against you. You feel that familiar coil curling deep into your belly, and your head drops to her shoulder as you roll your hips to meet hers.

Natasha wraps a hand around your throat and draws you back to her. There is a glassy look of pleasure in her eyes, but she squeezes just enough to let you know that she's still in charge. "Cum with me." It's not a request, it's a demand, and who are you to deny her when she's making you feel so good?

You cum together. It's hard and messy and absolutely the most amazing feeling you've ever had. You collapse on the bed, and Natasha falls into you, both utterly spent.

Sometime later, when you can both feel your legs, the two of you make your way to the shower. After cleaning each other, you help her change the sheets, and the two of you get tangled in each other's arms and fall asleep.

..............

Six weeks later, you're slipping your hand into Natasha's as you follow her into the Hard Deck on a Friday night. This time, you're not meeting some guy from some app that you deleted ages ago. Instead, your girlfriend is introducing you to her coworkers.

You had already met Bob, her backseater, a few weeks ago because he insisted on meeting you because Nat, or Phoenix as she was known to her friends, couldn't stop talking about you.

Natasha quickly got the two of you a beer before weaving through the crowd to a pool table in the corner.

She takes her time introducing you to each one of them. You smile and wave and try not to be awkward.

"Well, what do we have here? If it ain't Phoenix." A male voice draws out. You turn, and you have to bite your lip to stifle a laugh. "Bagman." Natasha replies flatly. "Always a pleasure, Nix, but what I want to know is who is your friend?" The tall blonde asks.

"This is my girlfriend, jackass, so don't get any ideas." Nat says. "Babe, this is—"

"Jake. Right?" You say cutting her off. "Yeah? How did you know that?" She looks at you with a questioning glance. Jake looks at you equally, confused, trying to decide if you're familiar or not.

"Remember my date that stood me up a few weeks ago, the night we met?" You ask her.

"No. You're kidding." Nat smiles before belting out a laugh. Suddenly Jake's eyes go wide as he connects the dots on who you are.

"Son of a bitch, Bagman, I think I owe you a drink." Nat laughs as you and her other friends join in. Jake's cheeks burn with embarrassment.

Nat wipes a stray tear from her cheek. "But seriously, Jake. Thank you for being a dick. If you hadn't stood her up, I might not have met this amazing woman. Seriously, I owe you one." Natasha smiles at him before pulling you in for a kiss.

............

Eeeekkk! I hope yall enjoyed this! This was my first time writing for Nat! Let me know what you think with a comment or reblog!

Tagging those who might be interested: @shanimallina87 @teacupsandtopgun @desert-fern @wkndwlff @roosterforme @daggerspare-standingby @dakotakazansky @startrekfangirl2233 @na-ta-sh-aa @katieshook02 @beyondthesefourwalls @je-suis-prest-rachel @soulmates8 @horseshoegirl @djs8891 @roosters-girl @rosiahills22 @dempy @callsign-magnolia @alchemxx @gretagerwigsmuse @mshistorylover @bradshawsbaby @seitmai @kmc1989 @bcarolinablr @waywardhunter95 @hisredheadedgoddess28 @whatislovevavy @inkandarsenic @mak-32 @jiminie-08 @dingochef @laracrofted @skipchat @princess76179 @schoollover @cheyrenee @angelbabyyy99 @bobfloydsbabe @sunlightmurdock @sebsxphia @atarmychick007 @queenlmno @sweetwhispersofchaos @mamaskillerqueen @the-aspiring-fanfic-writer @withahappyrefrain

#cherrycola27 #top gun maverick #top gun #natasha phoenix trace #phoenix smut #lt. natasha trace #natasha trace #natasha trace smut #tgm smut #tgm fic #tgm fanfiction #top gun 2 #red wine fall into me

[deeply-unserious-fellow]

I've made. S o m a n y. Attempts at analyzing Vox's relationship with the fuckin Angel & Val bullshit. So many. But they always come out sounding like fucking word salad. So instead, I'm going to try making a bulleted list of all the different pieces of evidence I've gathered, and then simply not draw a conclusion because I don't fUCKING KNOW-

Vox does not like Angel

Vox seemed excited at the prospect of Angel quitting(despite knowing he physically can't?)

Like his eyes *literally* lit up he was so excited(the same way Velvette's did when she was yelling about wrist ruffles & Carmilla's did during Whatever It Takes)

Saying "Angel quit?" could've been him joking, but between his expression, tone of voice, and the context surrounding the line, I don't think that's the case?

That line is weird as fuck man...

There are two reasons Vox doesn't like Angel: Val constantly freaking the fuck out over minor Angel-related things & he's probably jelous of how much space Angel takes up in Val's brain

Vox does not seem to care for Angel's well being, probably viewing him as nothing more then a cash cow

I say "seem" and "probably" because it IS significantly more likely that Vox doesn't give a shit, but we haven't seen Angel & Vox interacting one on one yet, so there's still a chance I could be wrong and Vox does care in some capacity? Again significantly more likely he doesn't I'm just trying to cover all my bases here

Which speaking of- we don't know how Angel feels about Vox at all? Like aside from Vox's cameo in Poison(Angel's pseudo-dream sequence), we don't actually get Angel's perspective on Vox. Ever.

Like I'd assume Angel doesn't LIKE him just by virtue of his relationship with Val but there's no real way to tell?

Vox(seemingly) hasn't done anything to deal with Val's weird issues with Angel

He probably can't get rid of Angel entirely because of the loss in profits

But he also hasn't attempted to limit Angel's ability to leave the studio or anything, and he hasn't done anything to Val that might discourage his irrational behavior

He's actually pretty hands off when it comes to all of the other Vees' shit just like. In general. The only time we see him interfering is when Val is destroying Velvette's stuff

Vox doesn't seem to give a shit that Angel moved out of the studio

Like he isn't even happy about it just true neutrality-

He only STARTS caring when Val starts threatening to shoot up a building about it(read: when his image is now on the line)

The look Vox gives Angel in Poison just kind of proves he. Doesn't like Angel. And is kissing(but appearently not dating???) Valentino.

The fact that the blood drips, which are usually on the left side of his mouth, are coming off of the right instead during this scene FEELS important but that's another topic entirely so I won't go into it here

Also, as stated before, Poison is a pseudo-dream sequence, so this scene might be less about how Vox views Angel and more about how Angel views Vox

But if that's the case, I cannot for the life of me decipher what the fuck Angel feels about Vox from this one shot so it's pretty much useless for now 💀💀💀

Alright that's it. I tried my best to be impartial and just write down what we know about the characters while also pointing out any gaps in information we might have, but if you think I'm being too generous or too harsh with any of these bullets and feel the need to tell me, PLEASE be nice about it and also use tone indicators. I don't wanna sound like a whiney baby or whatever the fuck but I genuinely cannot handle feeling like a stranger is yelling at me rn and tone indicators help me a LOT in that department.

#this is still fucking nonsense but this topic appearently destroys my brain cells so like #this is probably the closest I'll be able to get to successfully putting my thoughts on the subject down #I hate it here I hATE IT HERE #hazbin hotel #hazbin vox #hazbin hotel vox #vox hazbin hotel #angel dust #hazbin angel dust #hazbin valentino #hazbin hotel valentino #valentino hazbin hotel #gal overanalyzes random shit

[l0v3tast3]

pervy neighbor!toji headcanons !

toji sets his sights on you and just can't look away!

✎ tags: mdni!, smut, female reader, maybe tw for stepcest (toji dates your mom)?, age gap (reader is college age, toji is probably late-30's), kind of dubious consent, infidelity, loss of virginity, unsafe sex, kind of obsessive!toji, pet names, breeding kink, corruption kink, dacryphilia, reader definitely has daddy issues (but no daddy kink)

✎ word count: 5k words (might have gotten a little carried away. but it's proofread!)

✎ author's note: something about jjk characters makes me have the worst, filthiest thoughts i've ever had, but i'm not upset about it. also genuinely surprised that this turned out to be 5k words i thought it would be like 2k max ( 〃▽〃) . . . toji brings out the best and worst in me <3

masterlist | requests

♡ when toji first lays eyes on you, it's sick how fast he starts thinking dirty thoughts. your mother and you are his new neighbors, coming over to say "hi" and introduce yourselves. your mother looked to be around his age, while you looked like you were probably in college (she must have had you when she was young like he had with megumi), but the way you half-hid yourself behind your mom wasn't helping you look any older.

♡ your mom makes you introduce yourself to him and you do so shyly, calling him "mr. zenin", barely making eye contact with the man that was a full head and a half taller than you. he smiles down at you and sticks out his hand, and after a moment you shakily take it, his engulfing yours completely. he could easily pin down both your hands with one of his. hell, he could pin down your whole body with one of his hands. he lingers a little too long, and you retreat a little further behind your mom after he lets go, your face an adorable shade of red.

♡ toji only half-listens to your mother rambling on, mostly just staring at you and being grateful that his shirt was long enough to cover his boner. he tuned in when she talked about how you went to college but still lived with her because it wasn't far. he also listened to when your mother mentioned her job took her across the country or even out of it a lot of the time. oh, so many thoughts were already forming in his head. toji could get quite creative when he wanted to.

♡ he can tell your mom is attracted to him when she juts out her chest and mentions her deadbeat ex-husband more than once. so he exchanges numbers with her and flirts a little. he's a single man, what else is he to do?

♡ toji figures out that, by the grace of god it seems, your bedroom is the one with the window directly across from his, and you don't seem to realize that your pink lace curtains are see-through. it really just kept getting better for him, didn't it? he absolutely watches your silhouette of you changing, watching your little figure take your shirt and shorts off, imagining he was in the room with you. if he were there, he wouldn't have to watch you put on other clothes. he would take off your clothes for you, probably rip them a little too (on accident, of course). he would make sure you didn't put anything on for a good long time, except maybe some cute lingerie. or a collar.

♡ he takes the time to work up to dating your mom. toji's a patient man, he can wait to get his hands on you. distance makes the heart grow fonder, right? and the better he gets to know your mother, the better he gets to know you, too. oh, she raves about you, of course! a model student and such a good girl, never getting into any trouble, always focusing on your schoolwork. you graduated top of your class in high school, and were on track to do the same in college. her baby was basically a genius! toji's heart swelled to hear about just how much of a good girl you were.

♡ it's not long before he's at your dinner table with your mother and you and a wonderful home-cooked meal. the woman that he's supposed to be looking at luckily talks enough that she doesn't realize toji is staring at you the whole time. you practically squirm in your chair under his gaze, hardly saying a word unless you were spoken to. he asks you normal questions, like how's school going, oh you're in your last year? any plans after college? he loves hearing your meek voice stutter out your answers. your mom has to tell you to speak up and you get that cute redness in your cheeks again, raising your voice just the slightest bit. you still called him "mr. zenin", so he tells you to just call him toji. you nod, but you don't actually say his name after that.

♡ at the end of the meal, he of course insists on cleaning up himself, and he's in the kitchen with a grin when he hears your mother telling you to help him clean up. you mumble something he can't hear, and your mom responds with "he is not scary, now go help him!" and he laughs a little. he'll make sure you aren't scared of him for long.

♡ you shuffle in with a few more dirty dishes and place them next to the sink, then look around for something to do before awkwardly picking up a rag and starting to dry what he had already washed. after a little bit of silence, toji strikes up some friendly conversation. "so, are you really liking college? your mom has been telling me all about how well you're doing. she's always talking about how much of a good girl you are," he says. the way your face once again got red was something toji needed to see more often. you seem to stop dead in your tracks and malfunction a bit when he calls you a "good girl", and you stutter something like "uh, yeah, it's- it's been good. she... actually said all that?" he wants to feel how you'll clench around him when he calls you a good girl as you take his thick cock. "yeah, she did," he says with a chuckle. "what? does she not say it to you a lot?" you shake your head no. poor baby, no one was telling you how great of a job you were doing. toji will, though. he'll praise you all night long when you manage to fit all of him inside you.

♡ he starts coming over more after that. he notices that (when asked first) you start telling him more about your achievements in college, like when you ace an exam or your professors write good feedback on your essays. and of course, he's always there to tell you what a great job you did; sometimes he adds in the words "good girl", just for fun. he even starts getting little smiles out of you, tiny at first, but they started spreading to your pretty eyes not too long after. you even start calling him "toji", finally. his name sounds so good coming out of your mouth, he wants to hear you say it while he's got his head shoved between your squishy thighs.

♡ it takes months, months of toji jerking himself off to every filthy thought imaginable about you, months of getting you to warm up to him, months of convincing your mother that he really was into her. it all pays off when the worst storm of the season rolls in. it's around 10pm when your mom calls him from halfway across the country, worried about you because she heard about the storm. apparently, you'll "freak out" if the power goes out. you get paranoid easily, she says. toji tells her not to worry, he'll check on you. he grabs his keys and coat and is knocking on your door within two minutes, albeit drenched in rain water. he sees you peak around the curtain of the window next to the door before you open it, asking him what he was doing here. "your mom asked me to check on you. says you scare easy." she was absolutely right, but you still huffed indignantly.

♡ you let him in, of course, and ask him if he wants a change of clothes. you say your mom probably has some of her ex's old clothes lying around that might fit him. he says sure and asks if he could shower, too. you stutter out a "yeah" and lead him to the bathroom, showing him where the towels and soaps were, accidentally brushing against him in the tight space. he can feel how intense your heartbeat is, just for a second. it makes toji want to smooth his hands all over your body, dig into the knots in your back and make it slow before he raises it even higher. you scurry off to your moms room to find a change of clothes for him.

♡ it takes you awhile to dig out something that might fit him, a black t-shirt and gray sweatpants. it takes you so long, in fact, that he's out of the shower with just a towel wrapped around his waist, opening the door just when you're about to leave the clothes on the floor. he thinks your nose might actually start bleeding when you see him shirtless, and it's the cutest thing he's ever seen. part of him thinks it would be funny to just drop the towel, but you scare easy. you hand him the clothes and speed-walk to the living room before he can thank you.

♡ toji gets changed into the t-shirt that clings to his skin and the sweatpants that are loose but will definitely show the imprint of his dick as soon he sits down. luckily, your couch has pillows. he finds you in the living room, your legs curled up to your chest as you look through netflix for something to watch. he plops down right beside you, making sure to grab a pillow for his lap, putting a foot up on the coffee table. you ask him if he's staying, and he says of course, what if the power goes out? do you know how to use the circuit breaker? you say you sort of do. he clicks his tongue and declares he's staying. you just hand him the tv remote and tell him to choose something to watch. you always let him take the lead with everything.

♡ it takes a lot of back and forth of him teasing you for never knowing what to watch and you just repeating "just put on whatever you want!", and when you finally do decide on something, the power goes out. you let out a squeak and instinctively press yourself closer to him, but he's wrapping an arm around you and saying softly that it's alright, it'll come back on soon. he can see your worried expression from the streetlights shining in faintly, and he reaches up to lightly pinch your cheek, muttering that you're so cute like this.

♡ "you think- you think 'm cute?" you ask quietly, and he nods with a smirk. "mhm, think you're adorable. such a pretty girl," he says, leaning in just a little closer. his large hand that takes up half your face is in your hair now, tangling his fingers in it and playing with it a little. you're so warm, heating up the more he touched you. his other hand rubs your back, slowly going lower, inch by inch. he can see his touch having an effect on you, a very, very positive one. your breathing gets a little bit quicker. he can feel your heartbeat through your back.

♡ "think you're the prettiest girl i've ever seen." the hand on your back is coming back up, to your shoulder and grazing past your neck to cup the side of your jaw and stroke his thumb over your soft cheek. "do you not think you're pretty, baby?" you definitely notice the pet name, but you don't say anything about it, just look down and shake your head a little. "oh, princess, can't have that now." he guides your head back up to make you look at him again with wide eyes. "i can show you. you're gonna let me show you how pretty you are, right baby?"

♡ you give a tiny nod and he kisses you, and god, toji is in love with your lips. they're so soft and sweet, and he can't help but move a hand to the back of your neck to pull you in deeper, greedily swallowing the little noises you made. he finds it cute how you struggle to keep up with him, how a whimper escapes you when one of his overly-sharp canines catches your lip. he wants to mark you all over with them, claim every part of your body as his, listen to you yelp when he sinks them in almost too deep.

♡ toji draws away and laughs when you try to follow him, taking in your dazed look, red lips shiny with his and your spit and blown pupils. "aw, sweet girl, you already look so fucked out. haven't even done anything to you yet," he mumbles as he starts kissing down your jaw and around your neck. the pillow is gone and he's picking you up effortlessly to put you on his lap, facing him. he's obsessed with how small you are compared to him. you're trying so hard to hold back more noises, and your hands go to his broad shoulders, as if you were going to push him away (not that it would do anything, he's got an arm wrapped around your back now). but you don't, you just gasp out a whiny "what about my mom and you?" and he draws back a little to look you in the eye, lips hovering just over yours again. "'m just showin' you how pretty you are, baby. she doesn't appreciate you enough, does she? i can, so much better, princess. we can keep it secret, right?" he says, his voice low and rumbling and you look hypnotized.

♡ you nodded a little with an "mhm" and he smiles, kissing you again. he takes his time with you, as agonizing as it is, but he needs to work you open. your mom was going to be gone for another few days still, and he had already waited this long. when he pulled away again he went straight to kissing down the other side of your neck, using his hand still in your hair to move your baggy shirt to expose more skin. he uses the other one around your waist to press you into him a little more and down enough to feel his hard dick through your shorts and his pants. it forces a little gasp out of you and your grip on his shoulders tightens, balling his shirt. "toji, i've never- haven't done this before," you mumble. he knows, of course, he knew it from the start, could practically smell it on you.

♡ "'s okay, princess, i'll go slow. i'll be so gentle with you, promise," he mumbles into your skin, his hands all over your body, in your hair and on your back and your arms and under your breasts, over your stomach. it's almost overwhelming to you. his hands end up grabbing you under your thighs, just below your ass, and you let out a yelp and wrapped your arms around his neck tight when he stands up with you. "c'mon, baby, can't show you how pretty you are in here." he brings you to your room, glad to see there's a little bit of streetlight coming in too here. he sits down on the edge of your cushy bed with you still in his lap, lathering your collarbone with attention.

♡ his hands are rubbing your hips, edging underneath your shirt and pressing you down more and more against his aching cock. "feel how hard you get me, sweet girl? 's cause you're so damn cute," he breathes, and he's so happy when you start shakily grinding down against him, your legs spread so wide by his. he's been waiting for this for so fucking long, and now he's finally in your room, finally inching your shirt over your head for you. toji's scar stretches with his smile when he sees you aren't wearing a bra, and he catches the arm that tries to cover yourself up. "mm-mm, princess, gotta see all of ya." he puts your hand back on his shoulder and uses his to grope the tit he's not sucking and nipping and licking at. your body twitches and a dainty hand goes to his hair, and you're finally moaning for him, whimpering his name when he tugs a little too hard with his teeth.

♡ the power comes back on on it's own just as your nipples are starting to get sore, your fairy lights taped around the edge of the ceiling lighting the room up with a soft glow. toji detaches himself from you and smiles. "can finally fuckin' see ya again, 'bout time," he mumbles, going right back to what he was just doing. you whine and your grip on his hair and shoulder get a little bit tighter, but his hands don't let you move in any direction except closer to him. he keeps going, too busy thinking about how gorgeous your tits will look when they're swollen with milk, how sweet they already are and how much sweeter they will be, until you tug on his hair a little and say his name between sharp breaths. he finally lets up and his hands go to your waist and hips.

♡ he helps guide you while you grind down on him, just taking in how you close your eyes and let out sweet little gasps whenever he bumps your clit through your shorts and underwear. "gonna let me take these off of ya, sweet girl?" he murmurs, his hands massaging your thighs and ass, waiting impatiently for you to nod again before he picks you up again and lays you down on your bed. he's just glad it's a queen size; enough space for him to fuck you most ways he wants.

♡ he follows your shorts and underwear down your legs with his mouth, committing all your embarrassed squeaks to memory. you try to close your legs once he has everything off but of course he doesn't let you. toji's smile doesn't leave his face while he's taking your thighs in his hands to spread them apart, leaving one to smooth a hand over your belly. "prettiest girl i've ever fuckin' seen," he says again, watching his hand go to spread your little pussy apart. his thumb grazes your clit and your hips jerk and he laughs. "so damn sensitive. never had anyone down here, baby, not even to eat this pretty pussy out?" you can't even look at him when you shake your head. if it's possible, his dick gets even harder. "good. dumbass frat boys couldn't ever do it like i can."

♡ once toji finally gets his mouth on your soaked cunt he doesn't think he's capable of stopping. you're practically dripping onto the bed, and he's there to lick every drop up, swallowing it happily and coaxing as much more as he can out of you with his tongue. your body is already writhing, you already have your hands in his hair, you're already crying out for him, and he's in a state of euphoria.

♡ he stops for a moment and you're about to ask what's wrong before he's muttering about how the bed is "too damn short" and you're being dragged down to the edge. your noise of surprise turns into a gasp when he starts sucking on your clit again, now kneeling on the floor. toji throws your legs over his shoulders and holds down the top of one to keep you in place, his other hand coming back to your pussy. his middle finger is slowly sinking into you and he moans into you when he feels how tight you are; his hand is never going to be enough to get himself off after this. when he starts working in a second finger you cum; you can feel it everywhere in you, taking over your body and your head (you think you may get addicted to this, to toji doing this to you).

♡ of course, toji doesn't stop after you've cum once. he gives you a little break, despite being so close to breaking himself. he's so close to letting himself loose on you, so close to digging his fingers in just bit too hard and sinking his teeth in too deep. somehow, he manages to just rub your hips and nip at your inner thighs. you mewl out his name and try to pull him back up to you but he doesn't budge, instead laughing and shaking his head. "not yet, princess, you're still way too tight." he pushes two fingers back in, his mouth hovering back over your clit. "wouldn't want to rip you in half, would we?" you stopped listening the second he started back up on your still-sensitive clit, throwing your head back and grabbing his hair again. "ah-h, toji, wait-!" he wasn't listening either.

♡ he doesn't let up until he makes you cum with three fingers (twice) and you're nearly crying from overstimulation. the only words you seem to be able to form at this point are "toji" and "please", and toji thinks this is his new favorite version of you. eventually, when he runs out of patience and he deems that it won't hurt that much, he finally lets you come down from the high he'd kept you on. he leaves one more mark on your thigh before he stands up to strip himself down quick, releasing a breath of relief when his aching cock is finally freed.

♡ it takes a moment for toji to decide how to take you. in all the months he waited and thought about this, he never could decide on this part. he would have you ride him, if your legs weren't still shaking. he decided to just say "fuck it" and go with missionary; easier to see your cute expressions like that. toji moves you back up the bed and climbs over you, smiling and cooing down at your watery eyes and his favorite shade of red painting your skin. he wraps your legs around your waist and brings his hands to cup your face again.

♡ "aw, what's wrong, baby? you were beggin' me for somethin' just a minute ago, what was it? hm, princess? c'mon, use your words." you mumble out a little "please", and toji shakes his head. "'please' what? you want more, 's that what you're tryin' to say? c'mon baby, tell me you want more," he says, one of his huge hands grabbing your jaw, putting the lightest amount of pressure on it. your eyes widen a bit and you nod, squeaking out a "more, toji, please!" and his cheeks start to hurt from how wide his smile grows.

♡ he took a moment to appreciate the view of his dick resting heavy on your stomach, a before-shot of how deep he'll reach inside of you. his head came to just below your belly button; toji could have came just from that. he notices you're still just looking at him and he takes one of your hands and wraps it around his cock for you, and you finally look down at it. he wishes he could take a picture of your face, it's both hilarious and incredibly cute. "toji, 's not- not gonna fit," you mumble as he moves your hand up and down it. he laughs a little. "we'll make it fit, princess, don't worry." he's gathering both your hands now in one of his and pinning them over your head. "it'll only hurt for a minute, then it'll feel so good, baby, i promise. not gonna want me to ever stop." toji rubs his dick through the folds of your pussy, covering it in your own arousal, his head brushing your clit and making you whine. "all ya gotta do is lay here all pretty and take it for me, you can do that, right baby? i know you can, bein' such a good girl for me." you're melting and practically dripping from his words and he lines his head up to start pushing into you.

♡ your hands squeeze his just about as tight as your tiny pussy does around the head of his cock once it pops in. toji kisses you and moans while you gasp, and he pushes in a little more, and you already feel like this would be enough. he's so thick; his fingers had felt so big to you, but now that just made you feel dumb. he draws back an inch just to push in two more and your legs are tightening around his waist. you're making cute little noises while he pushes your jaw up to mark more of your neck. he's everywhere, surrounding your entire body with his, not giving you an inch to move. you feel him everywhere, inside and out, and he's so deep inside you, and he still has a couple inches to go.

♡ his hips finally meet your thighs and toji thinks he's found heaven. he was so elated to have you how he wanted you, ecstatic that his months of work had finally paid off. he stops sucking on your neck to come nose-to-nose with you, his hold on your jaw loosening so he could thread his hand through your hair. "ohh, fuck, pretty girl, you're doin' so fuckin' good, bein' such a good girl for me," he breathed with a smile and hooded eyes. "does it hurt, princess? 'm sorry, it'll go away soon, baby, i promise. gonna feel so good in a minute. feels so good around me, so much better that i ever thought- shit, baby," he chokes out a moan when you're squeezing even tighter around him and you whine, trying to move your hips to get him to move.

♡ he starts moving, and he swears he tries to go slow, but it admittedly doesn't take long before he's really fucking you. "takin' it like a fuckin' champ, baby, my god. feels so fuckin' good. never leavin' this pussy, fuckin' never, princess. hah, sweet girl, don't squirm so much, how am i supposed to find all your good spots like that? that's it, baby, just take it for me. such a good fucking girl." his mouth gets filthy and it just doesn't stop running while he fucks any air and any thoughts out of your body. he's too deep, there's too much of him but it's so good that you just don't care. it's so much better than you thought it would be, toji makes it so much better than you thought it would be.

♡ you cum before long and he fucks you through it, holding your jaw to keep eye contact with you the entire time, obsessed with the tears threatening to fall from your wet lashes. he slows down as you come down and you think he's mercifully giving you a break when he pulls out, despite your cry of protest that he wants to make his ringtone. then he's picking you up and standing up with you to sit in front of your floor-length mirror with your back to his chest. "don't ya remember, baby? i gotta show you just how pretty you are," he says in your ear as he digs his hands into your hips and ass tight enough that there will definitely be bruises, but he's lining you up and pushing you down on his cock before you can whine about it. you're clawing at his arms and reaching behind you to grab his hair while he keeps sinking you down, and he watches with a salacious grin.

♡ "see, princess, see how pretty you are? bouncin' up and down on my cock like you were fuckin' made for it, you were, weren't you? fuckin' perfect fit. you look so perfect taking my cock, such a pretty girl. prettiest fuckin' girl i've ever seen. no, no, don't look away baby, watch how good you take my dick inside your tiny little pussy. that's it, princess. this pussy is mine now, right, baby? right? yeah, all mine now. gonna ruin you for any other man on the fuckin' planet."

♡ you came again and toji wasn't far behind you after that, practically using you like a toy at this point. you did your best to cling to him, but the only thing you could do in his hold was to watch and feel his fat cock bullying in and out of your pussy. babbles and moans were all you could manage now, and the only thing that would have made toji happier was if he had his phone in his hands to record it. he'd have plenty of chances later, anyways.

♡ "gonna let me cum in your pretty pussy, baby? aww, hah, too cock drunk to speak, huh? did i fuck you dumb already? mm, like you like this a lot, princess. so sweet for me. i'll fill you up with my cum as a reward, how's that sound? ha! your pussy likes that idea! squeezin' me so damn tight, you like that idea, don't you pretty girl? ohh, just be good and take it, just like that baby."

♡ he slams you down all the way on his cock and wraps his arms around you, grinding up into you hard, and you feel your belly get warm and somehow you feel even more full. you go limp against him, closing your eyes and whimpering with every twitch of his hips. it's just the mix of your heavy breathing for a few moments before toji's sitting back up from curling you both forward, looking in the mirror again.

♡ "aww, c'mon baby, you're letting it all leak out," he says, his voice gravelly and a bit heavier than before. when you don't open your eyes fast enough, his hand is in your hair and pulling it to make you look at where his cum is leaking out of you around his cock. and he's still hard.

♡ "guess i'll just have to fill you up again to make up for it, huh, pretty girl?"

#jujutsu kaisen #toji fushiguro #toji fushiguro x reader #toji fushiguro x female reader #toji fushiguro x you #toji fushiguro smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #tw stepcest #— lilly writes! ♡

[noxtivagus]

hello, lune!!! sliding into your inbox bcs i felt bad if you were the only one who have done such actions. let me do the same as well!! how are you? i hope you are doing fine these days. i have read your posts and sometimes, i worry a lot about you. because, funny to say but i see myself in you. whenever i read what you have to say in your rambles, sometimes i, too, have felt the same way as you did. it pains me to see you in such state so i hope my words can somehow bring you a bit of comfort in your life (*´ω｀*)❤️ it may not be much, it may not help you even the slightest bit but that's alright. at least i tried, if it doesn't work then i'll think of another method to cheer you up and make you feel less sad. to make you feel less suffocated by your thoughts. i hope to whisk away the raining cloud in your head.

i'm glad that you have ffxiv as your coping mechanism. it's always good to have a healthy way of coping around!! i'm sure the game bought you sm comfort and i'm glad that it helped you a lot in your life. video games sure do bring joy in our lives, noh? they are indeed very special to us. i hope you aren't forcing yourself and overworking too much in school! ik that the ph school system is pretty shitty and all but always do remember to look after yourself and don't neglect your own well-being!! using fiction as an escape is good, it's alright to have some sort of distraction from suffocating thoughts. sometimes, it's alright to step down and shut ourselves from the outside world. being isolated from reality is not always a bad thing. there are times where it gets overwhelming and so suffocating so it's okay to distract yourself from it.

being trapped in your mind and binded by the past is indeed a scary thing, yk? i once have been in the same situation, even until now if i were to be honest. it's hard, sometimes you felt like you are on the edge of the steep cliff but i'm sure one day, there shall be a time where you break free from the shackles that chained you down and spread your wings and be free from those that bind you down. you are a very strong person, lune. one of the strongest i've ever met and i'm very proud of you for that.

indeed, the nostalgia you felt, the memories, and the past are the sole proof that you are alive— that you are human and you exist. that you have a mark in society. it's only natural that these mean so much to you. these experiences are part of pur nature as humans. the concept of humanity and reality is indeed confusing. sometimes, you feel your sense of those two slipping away. are we real? are we even human? what is our purpose in life? do we really have to play a role in society? is it possible to understand myself? can people understood me for who i am? is that what i can truly do? do we get an answer for these thoughts? maybe? or maybe not.

the pain you carry is the proof that you are human. you are very much alive. after all, humans cannot be called humans without the concept of pain and suffering. we feel to make us alive and pain is one of those aspect that makes us human. these emotions help us grow and after all, there is a saying that we learn from our mistakes, right? the same applies to pain and suffering. you deserve kindness that you give to others and i hope i can give you that, even the slightest bit of kindness that you gave to me. you made me feel less lonely here at tumblr— a platform where i have no idea where to start or what to do and i'm all alone because my friends don't have this site. i hope i could return the kindness and warmth you gave me one day. humans often get lost and confused, there are times where we get sidetracked. times where we just stop at our tracks and be stuck in one point in life but nonetheless, that's part as our traits as humans.

you are pretty young, lune. it makes me funny to say this as we are both practically in the same age range but!! you should enjoy your life to the fullest. do the things you love and the things you are passionate about. don't let these thoughts hinder you down. i believe that man cannot truly achieve something if they let the negative aspect of emotions become obstacles in their life. i like the way you are thinking, such a good mindset indeed. i aspire to have one similar to yours. it makes me glad that despite your situation, you never let these bring you down but instead look at the brigther picture. indeed, change doesn't come overnight but as long as you take small steps one at a time, you shall become a better and a newer version of yourself.

you are truly, and really a wonderful person. i admire you for that. i hope you have a pleasant evening ahead. do dream of sweet and nice dreams. i'm sorry if this gotten long but i really wanted to say a lot!!! no need to respond to this ask as long as i get to deliver the words i want you to hear.

YORI IM CRYING HFJDASLKFD there's so much i want to write back but i'm genuinely at a loss for words. i hope this is enough for now to let you know how thankful i am.

#🌙.inbox #🌙.moots #— yori ! 🤍 #like. in a good way. i am. wait i'm crying oh my god #usually i get too embarrassed or shy to answer these asks bcs i really get at a loss of what i want to say back but;;; #i wna change that starting now so. i will answer it #FIRST OFF uwah don't be obliged pls everything i do is solely bcs i want to n i don't expect anything in return 🥹 #that said though. thank you. god there's so much i could say but. yeah. thank you. i can only hope that the sentiment comes across #it genuinely means so much to me bcs. i think the words n comfort we share to others really reflect on our own selves as well. like we're #telling that to our own selves as well so. i think you know. i think you understand n relate to it more than i think of right now #it's so weird for me in a way to receive these stuff from others bcs i'm so used to being the one giving 😭😭 #damn i'm really at a loss for words i cried again while reading this n a lot of thoughts were running through my head. even now still #but knowing that there are people out there that / in their own way / knows how it feels to be this way too #like you for example. i think. it means a lot more to me than you'll ever know. so genuinely. thank you from the bottom of my heart #i'm proud of you too actually. i don't know too much about you as an online friend but i think you have gone through difficulties as well #to be able to write and convey something so touching. something so human and real. it's certainly a comfort in this world #i think. i think you're very strong as well to be able to do this for others. and i admire you for that #it really really means more to me than you'll ever know. to read it directly from another is. something i think i consider a luxury #since i usually give it to others but so many times especially with those i know offline. directly in active conversation. it's hard to #really open up n be honest? so just. thank you. as an online friend. for allowing me this opportunity. and for this kindness #hearing all this from another. that in itself means so much to me bcs i often end up unintentionally restraining myself in conversations so #thank you. for reading. for understanding in your own way. and for putting it in your own words and sharing them with me #sob believe me when i say this really means more to me than i could ever put into words. i think it's been a few hours already since #i first read this n started writing but even now at nearly 4 am i'm still at a loss for words so. thank you. genuinely. thank you so much #i'm really glad that i helped someone out there a bit. in my own way. 'kindness' and 'warmth'... 🥹 yori i cried even more /pos #USUALLY I'D BE ABLE TO LIKE. WRITE SMTH BACK BUT. i'm so speechless right now oh my god i really don't know what to write #and so i admire you for being able to do that. for having the courage to reach out (you were the first one that sent an ask to me too) #one day i hope i can. do this for you too. it really comforted me tonight and i'm seriously still speechless but i'll remember this forever #there's so much more i want to say and write right now but. perhaps this is enough for tonight. so i'll say my thanks once more #thank you. i hope you know that your own words really apply to you too. they come from you after all

[thebibliosphere]

Whenever I get a particularly nasty message, I always check to see if they're following me first. Nine times out of ten, they're not. But they're also, unfortunately, the same people who feel entitled to send me multiple messages in a row, most of them heavily steeped in the language of moralization and purity.

Like whenever I talk about painkillers or pain management, I always get a handful of well-meaning people who are maybe new to my blog or are just young, asking me if I've tried diet/exercise/meditation, etc.

Sometimes I'll respond to them. Other times I'll just ignore them because I get those kinds of messages so often it's like white noise, and maybe part of me hopes if they stick around on my blog, they'll learn it through exposure via my incessant bitching.

When you see me responding to someone offering that kind of advice, it's either because I'm at my fucking limit or because I'm hoping it's a teachable moment and an otherwise seemingly nice person might unlearn some harmful biases.

The people who don't follow me are not interested in any kind of conversation on the subject. They do, however, feel the most qualified to tell me, someone they didn't know existed until one of my posts crossed their dash, how to manage my life, everything I'm doing wrong, and why I'm a bad person.

And for them, my disability is proof that I am a bad person because they view health as a moral issue.

If you're sick, it's because you don't exercise enough, don't eat the right foods, don't pray enough, don't do enough. They genuinely believe that if they say and do all the right things, like a Good Person, they'll never get sick.

It's their security blanket against the harsh reality that anyone is one bad day away from disability. One faulty gene, one bad infection, one bad accident away from a life-long diagnosis. And if they do get sick, it's a test. A challenge to be overcome with Willpower as they learn the True Meaning of Life.

It can never just be a simple fact of life that sickness happens. That disability exists without a moral reason.

And it's suffocating.

Day in, day out. Folks who don't know me from fucking Eve telling me I'm being punished. Not always as outright as that. They don't always use that word. But sometimes I appreciate it when they do because at least then they're being honest. They're not couching it in the softer language of leftist circles. Not hiding it behind concern.

Because the truth is, there are just as many folks who think they're liberal and enlightened who'd be happy if disabled people just stopped existing. They don't like thinking about us because it makes them think about themselves. About their own fragility and mortality, and they hate that. They hate that there's something they can't control with their thoughts and actions. That they can't moralize their way out of.

Honestly, it's a relief when people are just cunts about it because I can hit the block button, safe in the knowledge that they were never the kind of person who would see me as a person. But when it's some 20yo kid with their pronouns, orientation, and "ACAB" in their profile spouting the same kind of moralization, sometimes even with the language of eugenics, it feels like such a betrayal. Like a loss.

And perhaps if I wasn't multiply disabled, I'd have the energy to pull them back. To tell them why they're wrong and hope like hell they realize what they're doing is harmful. But then, if I wasn't disabled, they wouldn't be messaging me, so I wouldn't be dealing with it.

I wouldn't be expected to use my existence as a teachable moment to spoon-feed them compassion. But I am, and I do. When I can. Not always with the grace that's warranted. Not always with the thought and compassion I ought to. (And I don't; I acknowledge that. I'm prone to anger and off-the-cuff remarks that are hurtful too. Though I try to keep most of it to myself or save it for therapy.)

Basically, if you've made it this far through the TED talk, don't be fucking cunts to disabled people. Don't tell chronically ill people to try yoga. Don't moralize pain relief. Suffering is not noble.

You need to kill the cop and the priest in your head telling you otherwise.

And also if you're the nice people sending me nice messages. Thank you. It helps cushion all of *gestures* this.

#chronic health tag #long post #ableism #thanks for coming to this huge rant I'll probably delete later #also sincerely #thank you to everyone who does send nice messages #you are the majority #it's just that the assholes are louder

[honeydazai]

when you say their dick is too big

feat.: Diluc, Kaeya, Childe, Zhongli, Itto, Scaramouche, Ayato, Albedo, Xiao

warnings: nsfw content, size difference, dacryphilia, degradation, praise, breeding kink, choking, Itto has a knot and barbs on his cock, Zhongli has two dicks

DILUC stops immediately when you tell him to — hurting you is the last thing he wants —, though he can't help but chuckle when you, teary-eyed, tell him that his dick is too big and that it won't fit. He quickly shushes you with a gentle kiss, his smile warm and loving as he reassures you that it'll be fine, he'll try to be as careful as possible.

Even though he tries to go slow for your comfort, he groans in pleasure when he finally bottoms out inside of you, your hips flush together, and while he had originally planned to give you some time to adjust to his size, he can't help but pick up a fast and hard pace a few moments later, because what you don't know is that your words sent a white hot spike of pleasure up his spine. His size kink is thriving, especially when there's a slight bulge showing through your stomach as he thrusts into you.

“You're alright, dear. It'll fit, don't worry. Ah, fuck—, you feel so tight around me. Archons, you can even see my dick through your stomach — fuck.”

When you complain to KAEYA about his cock being too large to fit inside of you, he genuinely can't help but laugh. You're adorable — really, he's at a loss of words here. There's a smile on his lips as he tells you that you'll be alright, and he doesn't bother to stop pushing into you; giving you time to breathe would only result in you overthinking even more. Besides, he knows you'll be fine.

When he finally pounds into you, his hips slapping against your own with lewd squelching noises accompanying each thrust, you're moaning and keening, your back arching, and there's mocking words and teasing sentences falling from Kaeya's lips before he can stop himself, but, really, who can blame him? Just a moment ago, you were protesting and worrying, and now you're taking his dick like a champ — it's almost ironic, really.

“Ah, look at you, darling. Weren't you just whining about my dick being too big for you? Now you're practically sucking me in. That's adorable. Makes me wonder if that innocent persona of you was but an act, doll.”

CHILDE has got you bent in half in a mating press when you whine about him being too big, his dick being too deep inside of you, and he couldn't deny that your words made his cock twitch inside of you even if he tried. He scoffs, obviously amused, and it's such a huge ego boost that he thrusts into you roughly, his hips flush with yours as he bottoms out in one quick movement that has you gasping and crying out.

There's some half-assed shushing from him as he assures you that it's fine, you'll be alright, but in reality, you're barely able to understand what he's saying with the almost violent pace he has set and he knows it. You're drooling while he pounds into you, saliva dripping down your chin, and Childe isn't shy to mock you for how desperate you look. By the end of it, he makes sure you're literally dripping with his cum.

“Fuck, babe, that's so hot—, you think I'm too big for your tight little hole, hm? Don't you worry, baby, I'll fill you up so good. You'll be fine—, ah, fuck, I promise, just let me make you feel good. Just let me breed you.”

ZHONGLI raises his eyebrows when you complain about his size in a seriously worried tone, but he's quick to shush you despite not understanding why you seem to have trouble taking only one of his cocks. The other one is resting against your abdomen as he slowly but surely continues to push into you, the tip of it dripping precum onto your skin.

While he's constantly praising you for how well you're taking him, he can't help that he enjoys seeing your eyes all glassy with tears, and his thoughts immediately go to how you'd cry and whine under him if he were to fuck you with both dicks, only to fill you up and breed you.

“You're so good for me, darling. You take me so well. In fact, I'm quite certain you'd even be able to take both of my cocks if you'd like to try.”

Honestly, ITTO is used to this kind of reaction. He's a big guy all around, which is why it doesn't come as a surprise when you claw at his back and whimper about him not being able to fit inside of you. Still, while he understands your worries, he's too much into it to stop now; he can't help that he continues to push into you until you're stretched wide around his dick.

He at least has the decency to apologise while thrusting into you, his hips slapping against your ass, even though he gets a massive ego boost from the way you're crying out. His apologies don't make it better — especially because his size isn't the only thing you have to deal with. What's much more difficult to take are the barbs on his cock, as well as his knot once he fills you up, but what can he say; he's an oni through and through and his biology is intent on breeding you.

“Ah, baby, fuck, 'm sorry, I don't wanna hurt you, fuck, I promise, you just feel so good, can't stop, please, babe, I need to fill you up—”

Honestly, SCARAMOUCHE thinks of you as ridiculously naive for even hoping that he'll be merciful when you blabber something about his cock being too big. You're on all fours underneath him, cheek against the ground and ass raised, and he's not above taunting you as he repeats your whiny plea in a mocking, high-pitched voice.

As if inspired by your words, he thrusts into you at once, his pace rougher than it needs to be solely because he wants to see you cry on his cock, your cheeks flushing and your eyes crossing as you clench around him. When he feels particularly mean, he even wraps a hand around your throat, if only to hear your high-pitched keening noises as you choke and whine, your thighs trembling and tears dripping down your cheeks.

“What are you saying? It won't fit? Oh, I'll make it fit, don't you worry. Besides, you're already dripping wet. Fucking slut. This is the only thing you're good for, so shut up and take what I decide to give you.”

While AYATO is quick to coo soothing words at you, his voice a low purr and with his hands gently caressing the curve of your hip, his lips also curl into a smirk. You can't see the way his eyes sparkle with mischief and something more sinister because of your position — your cheek pressed against the pillows, your back arched and ass raised —, but that his polite words are just a facade is obvious in the way his hips snap against yours.

The urge to make you cry just because of his cock makes his movements more hurried and rough, his usual effortless grace bleeding away into impatience and brutal thrusts. His nails dig into your hips as he rocks into you until your thighs are shaking and tears drip down your flushed cheeks, needy noises falling from your lips, and Ayato can't help that he wants nothing more than to truly break you.

“Oh, am I too big for you, love? Are you saying you can't take it? That'd be a shame, I was hoping to have you come on my cock. Ah, there you go — look, it fits. You're such a slut in reality, hm, darling?”

ALBEDO pauses the second you whine about his dick being too big to fit inside of you, his head cocked to the side in a curious manner as his gaze meets your teary eyes. While he's an attentive and observant lover, he also can't deny that his cock twitches inside of you at hearing you say that.

He tells you matter-of-factly that there's no need to worry, that your body is quite literally made for this and that it's obvious in the way your cunt is basically sucking him in, before continuing to push in until he bottoms out, your hips flush together. If you haven't relaxed until then, he's honestly at a loss of what to do, though a feeling of pride spreads through his veins when you finally moan and mewl in pleasure rather than in fear. He just loves being correct.

“Oh? Look at you, dripping wet around my dick. Didn't I tell you you were going to be alright? You're literally made to take my dick, love, and it seems you're a natural at it, too.”

When you first tell him to stop, please, that his dick is never going to fit inside of you, XIAO scoffs, his eyebrows drawn together into a frown. For a moment, he genuinely thinks you're making fun of him, though he quickly stops moving when he notices that there's tears welling up in your eyes.

The last thing he wants is to hurt you, which is why he pauses immediately. It doesn't matter how aroused he is, your comfort is his top priority, which is why he'll only continue once you give him the consent to. Even when he finally bottoms out inside of you, his hips flush with yours and with you mewling underneath him, he checks in on you to make sure you're alright.

“Fuck, I—, please, love, are you alright? Tell me. How are you feeling? May I continue? Fuck, you're so damn tight around me.”

➛ if you liked this, consider tipping me on ko-fi! it'd mean a lot!

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notes: more genshin filth more genshin filth

tags: @black-rose-29 @ibby-miyoshi-nerd @kaz-zuha @serenareiss

#honeydazai writes #🍒 content #Genshin Impact #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact headcanons #Genshin x reader #Genshin x you #Genshin smut #Diluc headcanons #Diluc smut #Diluc x reader #kaeya headcanons #Kaeya smut #Kaeya x reader #Scaramouche smut #scaramouche headcanons #Scaramouche x reader #Ayato Kamisato x reader #Ayato Kamisato smut #Arataki Itto smut #Arataki Itto x reader #Albedo x reader #Albedo smut #Childe x reader #Childe smut #Zhongli smut #Zhongli x reader #Xiao smut #Xiao x reader #Xiao headcanons

[pray4byron]

Hey Mio-!!! I know your reqs are closed rn so I'm really just leaving this here so I don't forget the idea, but I saw a tiktok that inspired meee and I was thinking what ab a reader who accidentally confesses to Vox/the hazbin people when drunk and based on their reactions maybe thinks they're turning the reader down but they aren't oki bye bye have a good weekend!!!

-🍂anon

𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐧𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐳𝐛𝐢𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐥 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐰 + 𝐯𝐞𝐞𝐬 ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-

a/n: hello 🍂anon!! i’m so sorry i kept you waiting on this, i couldn’t stop procrastinating it 😭😭 also i’m sorry if vox seems more mean then normal, i feel like i’ve been writing him too victim-y and at the end of the day he’s an asshole too and i tried to show that. but i hope you enjoy!!

warnings: mentions of alcohol/being drunk/drinking/etc, profanity, mentions of sex (no smut), vox being a bit of an asshole <;/3

proofread: HAH! no. (heh, your loss) someone tell me you got that reference 😭😭

including: charlie, vaggie, angel dust, husk, lucifer, vox

tags: hazbin hotel, fanfiction, x reader

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐞

girl is flabbergasted. i mean, she’s always heard the term ‘drunk words are sober thoughts’ or something like that, but she’s surprised you would say that to begin with — true or not.

but obviously, she feels romantically about you, so if it wasn’t true and it was just something you blurted out whilst drunk, she’s gonna be a bit upset

so she tells you, if you really feel that way, you can tell her when you’re sober, and she puts you to bed :)

𝐯𝐚𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐞

she can only maintain her calmness for so long until she simply loses her composure, she’s not good at hiding her true feelings and/or thoughts for an extensive period of time

vaggie makes sure you get to bed safe, but she doesn’t bring up until you’re fully sober, she wants your recovery from your hangover to be stress-free and relaxing — not anything that could make you distraught

although, she may or may not dote on you a little extra the next morning…

𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥 𝐝𝐮𝐬𝐭

angel knows what it’s like to say something you weren’t ready to whilst under the influence, he’s done it more times then he’s willing to admit

so he’s (as sweetly as he can be) stern about being 100% sober whilst making decisions to blurt this kinda stuff out

deep down, angel knows it’s true, he knows you wouldn’t lie to him about smth like that, drunk or not — but he can’t help but in awe in a way

like he’s a famous pornstar, you don’t love him for his money or body or looks, you love him for being anthony, and not angel dust, and he’s simply not used to it

𝐡𝐮𝐬𝐤

husker is a bartender, he’s heard everything in the book, exceeeept someone drunkenly confessing to him while he’s serving them drinks after a shitty night

it’s safe to say… he’s cautious, he’s seen a lot of drunk people do a lot of dumb shit, so he’s unsure if confession is as sincere as it can be

first, he wants to make sure you’re in the right mind before he even thinks before saying he feels the same, he’s been hurt a couple times, and he’s not ready to go through that again, whether he admits it or not

it’ll probably take him a few days until he brings it up, he’s the kinda guy who wants to reflect before making big decisions

𝐥𝐮𝐜𝐢𝐟𝐞𝐫

honestly, lucifer is probably the most shocked out of all them, after being divorced for seven years, possibly more, the guy eventually thought he was gonna be forever alone, especially considering he’s the literal king of hell

the thought of that you’re drunk and may not know what you’re getting into doesn’t even cross his mind, he’s had few interactions with women tbh, and most of them were mainly sexual (like with adam’s wives)

so he gets all giddy and happy and accepts your confession immediately ! it doesn’t hit him until a few months into your relationship that he probably should’ve waited until you were sober LOL

𝐯𝐨𝐱

vox, like angel, has never had someone genuinely confess their love to him. he’s had an on-and-off sexual relationship with valentino and gotten creepy love letters from fans — but that’s about it

honestly, as shitty as it he can’t help but take advantage of your drunken state, just slightly.

he sorta feeds into any praise you give him, and will lowkey force it out of you, his ego needs to be fed and it’s only getting started

let’s be real, vox isn’t the most perfect guy around, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t hold a soft spot for you, although, at this point, a solid relationship cannot be promised :(

i do not permit for my work to be reposted, translated, or stolen. all rights go to signedmio. characters are not mine, unless stated, and belong to their rightful creators.

#mio’s writing ! ☆ #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x y/n #hazbin hotel x you #charlie x reader #charlie morningstar hazbin hotel #hazbin charlie morningstar #charlie morningstar #vaggie x reader #hazbin vaggie #vaggie hazbin #hazbin hotel vaggie #angel dust x you #angel dust x reader #angel dust hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel angel dust #husk hazbin hotel #husk x reader #hazbin hotel husk #hazbin husk #lucifer hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar x reader #hazbin hotel lucifer #lucifer x reader #vox x y/n #vox hazbin #vox x reader #hazbin hotel vox #🍂 anon

[qqueenofhades]

what's been particularly vile to me is this group of white online leftists who insist that anyone who cares about more than this one issue for the election is a bad person, like, as if us black and brown people are making up reasons to be afraid and not.....believing the gop when they say they are coming for us. believing trump who has said previously that he does not bluff, that he will do the things he's said he will do (i hate what social media has gone to the word gaslighting but it feels like gaslighting. we lived through four years of trump. we saw the damage. stop treating us like we're being dramatic). it must be great to not have to worry about that i guess? "life won't change under trump" is such a telling admission because maybe theirs won't but mine will. and so many others' will.

and it is often again these (white) online leftists that love to call anyone who disagrees with them a white liberal (derogatory) because they know it would be racist (bad) to be this shitty and condescending to poc but they don't want to actually listen to anything black and brown voters are saying. it's easier to just call us white liberals and throw our opinions out, to ignore the work of black people for decades to gain the right to vote, to disregard the weight of telling them to not do that. it's genuinely appalling. they care so much about racism until it's time to engage with poc who have different opinions than their online echo chambers, then we're just stupid liberals with terrible opinions like..... wanting to live. not wanting four more years of trump. so sorry for that.

sorry for this vent in your inbox, i'm just so fucking tired of white people trying to rewrite history as if trump wasn't that bad. he was for my family and countless others and i am terrified for what's to come if he wins.

The thing about (the often-white) Online Leftists is that they have become just as much as a radicalized death cult as the diehard Trumpists. If you don't want to die for The Revolution and/or sacrifice your life, friends, family, the rest of the country, etc., then you're Insufficiently Pure and must be Purged. (Which I think is just complete BS, as none of them could actually handle sacrificing anything, but it's increasingly the only kind of performative rhetoric that is acceptable in leftist-identified discourse spaces.) This is functionally identical to "if you aren't willing to lay down your life for our Lord and Savior Donald Trump and the Great White Christian Nationalist Dictatorship, you're a liberal cuck," but with the names and justification changed. It doesn't change the underlying radicalization, nihilism, and insanity of the premise.

Another thing the Trumpists and the Online Leftists have in common is that they are busily rewriting just how bad Trump was in order to serve their Ideology. Ever since January 6, 2021, the Republicans have thrown everything they have at revising and whitewashing any suggestion that it was an "insurrection," and the Online Leftists have done the same, in an attempt to "prove" their insane point that Trump "would be better" than Biden. This is embodied in the recent ultimate-brainworm-nonsense maximalist-online take that "Biden has to lose so the rest of the world will see that the US rejects genocide!!!" That's right, the message that the rest of the world would take from Biden losing to Trump is that the US rejects genocide. Never mind if Trump literally wants to commit all the genocide possible and to install himself as a fascist theocratic dictator. In the deeply twisted minds of the Online Leftists, this is the only possible interpretation of Biden's loss, so they'll push for it as hard as they can! The Trumpists and the Online Leftists, at this point, are working pretty much in concert to damage Biden for similar insane reasons and get Trump elected. Etc etc., one Nazi and ten people at the same table is eleven Nazis.

Like. Sure. Four years ago, when Trump was president and people were dying by the thousands because he didn't want to wear a mask because it smeared his bronzer, just to name literally one of the terrible things he did every single day (and not even mentioning how much worse a second term would be) we were absolutely better off. Super-duper great. (Sarcasm.) Either that or "there is suffering and evil in the world and the only solution is to drastically increase the suffering and evil for everyone and to destroy what progress we have managed to make because It Does Not Fix Everything Now" is an absolute moral imperative, and either way, yeah. I'm calling bullshit.

#anonymous #ask #politics for ts

[edenesth]

The Mystery of Minho's Heart

Pairing: non-idol!Minho x fem!reader

AU: university au (exes to lovers)

Word Count: 10.7k

Summary: You and Minho have been dating for a while, but his stoic demeanour and inability to express emotions have left you doubting his love. It's not until you voice your doubts and ask to break up that he realises how deeply he loves you and that he must do better to make you understand just how much he cares.

MAIN MASTERLIST

"Let's break up, Minho."

Those were words you hurled mercilessly his way just an hour ago.

Your boyfriend, now ex-boyfriend, sat numbly on the couch in his dormitory, still reeling in shock as he attempted to process everything you had unpacked earlier.

"What, why?" He recalled asking, his voice barely a whisper.

A painful sound escaped your throat, resembling a sarcastic chuckle that, to him, sounded more like a frustrated cry.

"Please tell me you're joking; this isn't funny." Minho pleaded, desperately hoping it was just a silly prank. However, the hurt expression on your face communicated that it was anything but.

You were dead serious.

"I-I don't understand... Where is this coming from?" He questioned, trying to make sense of the situation.

It broke his heart to see the emotional exhaustion etched across your face. For the past year, he hadn't realised that anything was wrong; he genuinely believed everything was fine.

The wearied smirk on your lips only deepened the sense of foreboding in the pit of his stomach, "Why of course, you wouldn't understand. Perhaps it was my fault for expecting too much from you." You muttered, frustrating him with the lack of clarity about what exactly he had done wrong.

Before he could open his mouth to ask, you looked him dead in the eye, "Just answer me this: do you even love me?" He froze, his fists clenching, struggling to formulate a response.

With a sigh, he nodded gingerly, "Come on, you know I do," You shook your head, tears now welling in your eyes, "No, Minho, I don't. If you do, then say it to me right now. Tell me you love me." He blinked rapidly, avoiding your intense gaze.

For some inexplicable reason, those three words seemed unable to escape his lips. Throughout your relationship, he had never vocalised those sentiments to you. It wasn't because he lacked those feelings for you; Minho simply wasn't one to openly express affection in that manner.

And he thought you already knew that.

Releasing a haunting laugh, you wiped away the tears streaming down your face with the sleeve of your shirt, "See? We've been together for a whole year, Minho, and you can't even bring yourself to tell me that you love me. Maybe it was foolish of me to expect anything more from you."

Minho found himself at a loss for counterarguments because you were undeniably correct.

"At times, I questioned whether I was ever truly your girlfriend. You treat your friends better than you've ever treated me. Am I an idiot for hoping you'd show me even a fraction of the affection you readily give everyone else but me? What am I even to you?"

He wished he could find the right words to say at this moment, but his mind was blank as he finally grasped the impact of his actions, or lack thereof, on your feelings throughout your relationship.

"Don't beat yourself up too much, though. I guess I'm just not the right person for you. It took me a while, but I've come to realise that now. Despite how much I still love you, I just... God, I can't do this anymore. I'm tired, Minho."

Inhaling deeply, you expressed your frustration, "I'm sick of having to beg for your love, sick of feeling trapped in a one-sided relationship, sick of wishing that you'd someday fight for me too. I thought maybe you felt suffocated by me at some point, so I've decided to free us both from this misery."

Before he could figure out what to say, you grabbed your bag and left, uttering a final, "Goodbye, Minho. Take care of yourself."

The resounding slam of the door marked your exit, leaving him to collapse onto the couch where he remained, frozen in the same position until now.

It's really over... She's gone.

The days following your breakup had affected Minho more than he would like to admit.

As he navigated through the aftermath, a stark realisation hit him like a ton of bricks. Reflecting on his past behaviour, he couldn't deny that you were right. He had showered his friends with more affection than he ever extended to you.

Strolling around the university campus after class one day, the sight of couples embracing, laughing, and sharing tender moments struck him with a pang of regret. It became painfully evident that the connection you two shared was far from the warm, loving relationships he observed around him.

His lack of verbal expressions of love was only the tip of the iceberg; he now recognised he had also failed miserably in conveying any physical affection or caring gestures that would have indicated his feelings for you.

Who could blame her for leaving me, really?

The truth dawned on him – he had been a less-than-ideal boyfriend, failing to provide the emotional and physical reassurance that a relationship thrived upon. He realised that the change he needed to make went beyond mere words.

Minho felt especially bad when he thought about how you tried to get closer to him at the start of your relationship. You genuinely wanted to connect with him, but he kind of avoided it without realising. Remembering those times made him feel a lot of guilt because you were just looking for love and validation from the person you cared about.

As time passed, he noticed that your attempts to get closer became less and less. What started as you trying hard to feel loved turned into you slowly giving up. It might sound a bit harsh, but all you wanted was to feel loved by your partner.

Eventually, you stopped trying altogether.

The realisation that you had to stop trying to get close to your own boyfriend, not because you wanted to, but because you felt you had no other choice, made him feel horrible now. He understood that his actions had a big impact on the closeness you both should have had, and the regret weighed heavily on him every day.

"You miss her, don't you?"

A sudden nudge on his shoulder jolted him out of his thoughts. He turned to find Jisung looking at him expectantly. When Minho shifted uncomfortably and avoided eye contact, Jisung sensed he had struck a chord.

"Hyung, be honest with me. Why did you two break up?" Jisung asked, guiding Minho to a bench for a heart-to-heart talk.

Minho let out a heavy sigh, burying his face in his hands before confessing, "She said she felt... I— Look, I was the worst boyfriend on earth, okay? Jisung-ah, what kind of lover am I if I can't even tell her I love her, can't even hold her hand in public, or do anything to show her how much she means to me?"

Jisung smirked lightly, surprising Minho with his response, "About damn time you realised that," Minho's eyes widened at the unexpected insight, "W-what do you mean? Even you noticed?"

His friend rolled his eyes, "I think the whole world knew except you, hyung. The other guys and I have been wondering how noona could've stayed with you that long. We guessed she must've really loved you to be okay with that. I won't lie; she didn't even seem like your girlfriend at some point. Even we were starting to believe you'd lost interest in her. Or more like, have you ever been interested in her since the beginning? Your entire relationship... it looked pretty one-sided, like noona was the only one trying."

A shaky sigh escaped Minho's lips; he truly was the worst boyfriend anyone could ever ask for. If even his friends could see that, he couldn't imagine how much worse you must have been feeling all this while.

She must have been so lonely.

"That was... until we saw how much the breakup has affected you. We figured you must have loved her too." Jisung murmured, patting Minho on the shoulder.

"I do... She means so much to me. I wish she knew that," Your ex muttered, crestfallen. Jisung cleared his throat and crossed his arms over his chest, "Well, it's not too late to show her. Maybe... just maybe, you can win her back again."

Minho looked up at his friend with hopeful eyes, "You'd help me?" Jisung nodded, "I would but on one condition."

"What is it?"

"You must promise me to treat her right this time, hyung. There's no point in chasing her back just for you to do the same thing all over again."

Your ex nodded eagerly, "Of course, I will! I... we all know how bad I am at showing affection openly, but I realise now that it isn't an excuse for the way I've treated her. That doesn't excuse the way I've neglected my own girlfriend, the one I was supposed to love and care for the most."

At that, Jisung sprang out of his seat, hands propped on his hips, "Well, what are you waiting for then? Let's gather the boys and get to work! You don't want to make noona wait any longer than she already has now, do you?"

With newfound determination, Minho trailed after his friend, a small smile playing on his lips, "Of course not, let's do this."

It was disheartening that it took a whole breakup for your ex to realise just how much he loved you. But this time around, he vowed to make things right by showing you what he was willing to do to have you back by his side.

Since the breakup with Minho, you haven't been in the best emotional state. It frustrated you that you missed him, although you couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was that you missed. After all, it's not like he had given you much to long for.

The reality stung; there wasn't a significant difference in your life before and after the separation. The only change was the absence of contact, and you no longer visited his dorm to check on him or cook for him.

A bitter laugh escaped you at the realisation.

Perhaps that was the role you played in his life all along. A free caretaker, always ready to provide. Nothing more, nothing less.

Yep, sounds about right.

Dragging your feet back to your dorm, you were lost in your thoughts when your roommate Nayeon greeted you with a mischievous smile, "Hey, guess what? There's a bouquet of flowers for you on your desk."

You raised an eyebrow, puzzled, "For me? Who would send me flowers?" The idea seemed unlikely, considering your recent breakup with Minho.

Nayeon shrugged, feigning innocence, "I don't know, you tell me. Maybe you've got a secret admirer already. Moving on pretty fast, aren't we?"

Rolling your eyes, you dismissed her teasing with a casual wave, "Don't be ridiculous. It's probably some mix-up or a delivery for someone else."

But curiosity got the better of you, and you headed straight to your desk. There, amidst the textbooks and scattered notes, sat a beautiful bouquet of your favourite flowers. A small card peeked out from between the petals. You carefully retrieved it, unfolding the note that simply read, 'Thinking of you.'

Confused yet intrigued, you couldn't fathom who would send such a gesture, especially so soon after the breakup. Nayeon watched your reactions with interest, her teasing grin widening.

"Alright, spill the details. Who's the mystery person trying to sweep you off your feet already?" She teased, eyes gleaming with curiosity.

You sighed, still uncertain about the sender's identity, "I have no idea, Nayeon. It's probably just a friendly gesture or something. I'm definitely not jumping into anything new so soon."

Nayeon chuckled knowingly, "Sure, sure. Just enjoy the mystery flowers then. Who knows, maybe it's a sign that good things are on the horizon."

You shook your head, amused by her antics, but deep down, a small spark of intrigue and hope flickered within you.

Days turned into a charming series of unexpected surprises after the mysterious bouquet of flowers. Opening your locker after a gruelling day of classes, you found a bag of your favourite snacks tucked inside, a small note accompanying it with the words, 'Thought you might need a pick-me-up.'

Another time, as heavy rain unexpectedly poured down, you spotted a neatly folded umbrella outside your classroom door. The attached note read, 'Stay dry!'

On a day when you forgot your pencil case, you returned to find a spare pen waiting for you on your desk. The anonymous gestures were sweet, thoughtful, and seemed to brighten even the gloomiest days.

Nayeon, your ever-curious roommate, couldn't resist turning the mystery into a daily guessing game, "Come on, spill it! Who is this secret admirer of yours? A cute guy from your literature class? The barista at the coffee shop? Maybe even Minho trying to win you back?"

You chuckled at her playful interrogations, neither confirming nor denying anything. The truth was, as much as you wanted to believe it could be Minho, deep down, you knew better.

These were gestures he would never make.

Nonetheless, you allowed Nayeon's amusing speculations to continue, secretly enjoying the lighthearted distraction they provided. The mystery benefactor seemed to have an uncanny knack for brightening your days, leaving you both curious and grateful for the unexpected kindness.

One evening, after another surprise had made its way into your day, you gathered all the notes you had received so far. As you inspected them, your heart suddenly clenched in your chest. The handwriting on the notes felt strangely familiar, sending a shiver down your spine.

"No, it can't be." You whispered to yourself, disbelief colouring your voice. You studied the curves of the letters and the way each word was carefully penned.

It couldn't be possible.

It just couldn't.

A realisation struck you, and you felt tears welling up in your eyes. You couldn't bring yourself to believe it, but the resemblance was uncanny. You swiftly wiped away the tears before they could betray your emotions, refusing to succumb to the overwhelming surge of hope and despair.

You scolded yourself internally, reminding yourself of the reality you knew too well. Minho hadn't bothered to contact you even once after the breakup. The person behind these thoughtful gestures couldn't possibly be him. You deserved better than to cling to false hope.

With a deep breath, you put the notes aside, pushing away the fleeting wish that it could be him. You steeled yourself against the fragile optimism that tried to sneak in, telling yourself that you deserved someone who would openly show their love and appreciation, not someone who hid behind anonymous gestures.

Trying to move forward, you attempted to live your life without being too consumed by the mysterious gestures.

But the universe seemed determined to test your resolve. As you trudged towards your locker after class, you caught a glimpse of the person behind all these surprises in the act of leaving you a cup of your favourite beverage.

Your breath hitched as you recognised the familiar back – it looked just like your ex-boyfriend. Refusing to believe it was him without confirmation, you hesitated for a moment.

"Hey, you there." You called out, hoping your voice didn't betray the mix of emotions within.

The guy stilled at the sound of your voice, seemingly contemplating whether to leave or stay. Determined to get answers, you called out more firmly, "Has it been you this whole time? Are you the person leaving all these things for me?"

He clenched his fists for a moment, and you held your breath until he finally turned around. His eyes met yours, and your name escaped his lips in a whispered acknowledgement.

"Yes, it's me."

Seeing Minho again after so long left you conflicted.

The surprise of discovering he was behind the thoughtful gestures clashed with the unresolved feelings from your past relationship. Unsure of how to react, you found yourself caught in a moment of confusion, staring into the eyes of the person who had once meant so much to you.

"But why? What's the point of doing all this now, Minho? Isn't it a little too late?" The words croaked out of your throat, a mixture of frustration and the pain that lingered from the past.

Your ex felt the weight of your questions like a punch to the gut, a sharp reminder of the hurt he had caused. He knew he deserved every bit of your scepticism and hesitance. Stepping closer to you, he stopped at a safe distance, not wanting to overwhelm you. His eyes reflected regret, and he began to speak, the words measured and filled with sincerity.

"I know I messed up, and I'm truly sorry," Minho admitted, the weight of his own guilt evident in his voice, "You were wrong to think I didn't love you. I do. I always have," He took a deep breath, determined to convey the depth of his feelings, "I want to make things right, to earn back your trust. I'll do everything I can to show you how much you mean to me."

As he smiled softly, his expression held a mix of regret and hope, despite the doubtfulness etched on your face. He knew actions spoke louder than words, but at that moment, all he could offer were words of remorse and a promise to change. It was now up to you to decide whether to let him back into your life.

You chose to remain silent, resisting the urge to crumble under the weight of his touching words.

Your heart raced as he took another careful step closer, the tension between you palpable. You gasped lightly in surprise when he gently reached for your hand. Instead of placing the drink in your locker, he put it directly into your hand now.

"Here, it's your favourite. I know you think I never paid any attention to you, but I have, in my own way. I remember everything you liked. You probably don't trust anything I say now, but in time, you'll see. I'll show you how much I care." Minho spoke softly, his words filled with sincerity. With a final, heartfelt smile, he walked away, leaving you to digest his words.

As you gazed down at the beverage in your hand, a mix of emotions washed over you. The liquid warmth seeped through your fingers, mirroring the warmth that his words had unexpectedly brought. A part of you wished this wasn't a dream, that his promises were genuine and that time would indeed reveal a change in him.

With wet eyes, you stood there, processing the encounter, torn between the past and the possibility of a different future. The vulnerability and uncertainty lingered, but so did a flicker of hope.

This is your last chance, Lee Minho.

The following day, as you walked out of class, your heart skipped a beat when you spotted Minho standing there, waiting for you.

He looked ethereal, and you couldn't help but notice how easily your heart reacted to the mere sight of him. He remained your weakness, a fact you were trying hard to ignore as you attempted to keep the walls around you intact.

His face brightened upon seeing you, and he immediately came up to you, holding out your favourite sandwich and coffee in his hands, "Here, your favourite. Please don't skip breakfast again." He said with a genuine smile before sauntering away, leaving you standing there, heart fluttering.

In the cafeteria, Nayeon couldn't resist teasing you as you approached her with food already in your hands. She observed with a knowing look, fully aware that you couldn't have prepared the breakfast yourself.

She couldn't resist commenting, "Well, well, someone's got a secret admirer. Any idea who it might be?" Her teasing grin only fueled the internal battle of emotions you were trying so hard to navigate.

Timidly, you admitted to her that it had indeed been your ex behind all the thoughtful gestures, "It's... it's Minho."

Her playful demeanour dropped, replaced with a softness that conveyed understanding. Nayeon had been the one by your side during the tough days of your relationship with Minho, and she knew the emotional weight this revelation must carry for you.

With a comforting arm around your shoulders, she listened as you poured out the events of the previous day – how you caught him in the act, the words he spoke, and the fear that gripped you, "I'm scared, Nayeon. I'm afraid of allowing myself to hope, afraid of the possibility of another heartbreak."

Being the good friend that she is, she offered her perspective, "You said it yourself, these were things he would never do back then. If he's willing to do it all for you now, perhaps he really is trying his hardest to let you know how much you truly mean to him." Her words were a gentle encouragement, a reminder to consider the possibility of change.

As you rested against her, grateful for the support, you realised that perhaps, despite the uncertainties, Minho deserved a chance to prove that people could change. Your roommate's wisdom offered a glimmer of hope in navigating the complex emotions and decisions that lay ahead.

In the weeks that followed, you decided to take Nayeon's advice and give Minho a chance to prove himself. Slowly, you began accepting all of his gestures, allowing the walls around your heart to soften. Small smiles turned into genuine expressions of gratitude, and you found yourself opening up to him again.

Encouraged by your responses, he grew bolder in his actions.

One day, he decided it was time to move beyond just handing you lunch – he wanted to take you out for a meal. Recalling Changbin's advice that he needed to take the first step, Minho mustered the courage to invite you. His heart soared when you nodded shyly, accepting his invitation.

As you sat across from each other at the restaurant, he couldn't help marvelling at how beautiful you looked. Your eyes sparkled with joy as you enjoyed your favourite food, and he couldn't shake the feeling of regret for not appreciating you more before.

He had taken you for granted, assuming you would always be there for him despite his neglect.

Now, as he looked at you closely, he felt a deep desire to make amends. He longed to hold you close, to show you the love and appreciation you deserved. The realisation of what he had almost lost fueled his determination to cherish every moment with you moving forward.

As you both shared dessert after the meal, the atmosphere was light and comfortable. Minho chuckled fondly when he noticed how adorable you looked getting a bit of ice cream on the corner of your lips. Without giving it much thought, he reached over and gently wiped your lips with his thumb, a small, tender gesture.

The action caused you to freeze momentarily, your eyes meeting his. His own widened slightly as he realised what he had just done. There was a moment of unspoken tension, an acknowledgement that something had shifted.

At that moment, he couldn't deny the sudden, intense urge to kiss those lips of yours. He found himself wondering why he hadn't kissed you more often back then, recognising that he must have been blind to the simple yet profound joys of expressing affection.

Lingering in the aftermath of the sweet gesture, a new awareness settled between you. Minho couldn't help but contemplate the missed opportunities and the potential for a brighter future.

As more time passed, you found yourself growing closer to him in ways you hadn't experienced even when you were together before. Gradually, you allowed the remaining walls around your heart to fall, and he reciprocated by falling deeper in love with you. He often pondered why he had been so foolish to deprive himself of your warmth in the past.

Despite knowing you for quite a while, everything felt refreshingly new. It was as if you both were rediscovering each other, experiencing the joy of falling in love for the first time.

With the support of his friends, Minho actively worked on expressing himself and his feelings better. He had learned from his past mistakes and was determined to be more present and attentive to your needs. He willingly put in the effort, realising the profound impact of your absence would be far more miserable than any challenges faced in rebuilding your relationship.

Every day became an opportunity for growth and understanding, and he cherished the chance to create new memories with you, vowing not to repeat old mistakes. This journey felt like a second chance, and he was determined to make the most of it.

Walking you to your next class after the little date he had just taken you on, he resisted the urge to pull you close and settled on a small wave. He watched you enter the lecture hall and made sure you were comfortably seated before leaving.

"Welcome home, loverboy," Chan grinned, playfully whistling as Minho entered the dorm. Seungmin joined in, laughing, "Someone sure looks happy."

With a lovestruck look on his face, he sheepishly shrugged his shoulders, "Well, I do feel happier."

Jisung couldn't resist teasing, "Is someone nursing a little crush?" His smirk hinted at the knowing glances exchanged among the friends.

Minho chuckled, realising there was no point in trying to keep it a secret, "Okay, maybe more than a crush. Things are different now. I can't believe how stupid I was before."

Chan clapped him on the back, "Better late than never, mate."

Basking in the warmth of his friends' support and encouragement, Minho hesitated for a moment before gathering the courage to bring up a more serious question, "Guys, do you think it's too soon to... you know, ask her officially? Like, get back together?"

Changbin tilted his head, deep in contemplation, before shaking it slightly, "I feel like it might be a little soon, hyung. You did her one year's worth of damage, and I seriously doubt that a short period would be enough to completely earn her trust back. Perhaps you should take things slow and steady first."

The rest of the guys seemed to agree, each nodding in support of Changbin's insight. Jisung added, "Maybe you need to put her first in this case, hyung. Wait until she's ready before officially getting back together. Rushing things might not be the best move here."

Minho absorbed their advice, realising the importance of patience and understanding in rebuilding a relationship. The echoes of his past mistakes reminded him that rushing into things had been part of the problem before. With a nod, he acknowledged the wisdom in their words, grateful for friends who not only cheered him on but also guided him with sincerity and care.

They're right, it's my turn to wait for her now.

Returning to your dorm with a small smile, you rolled your eyes when you spotted Nayeon sitting on her bed opposite yours, wearing a patient expression paired with a teasing grin. It was evident she was ready to hear all the juicy details of your lunch date with Minho.

As you recounted the moments spent with him earlier, she squealed excitedly and bounced over to your side. With a sly smirk, she asked the inevitable question, "So, if he asks you to be his girlfriend again, what's your answer?"

Your smile slightly faltered at the question, and you decided to be honest with your roommate.

"I don't know, Nayeon. While I'm genuinely happy with the positive changes in him, I... I'm still scared. Wh-what if, as more time passes and all this initial excitement wanes, he reverts to his previous behaviour? I know I shouldn't be so pessimistic, but I can't help it."

Nayeon nodded in understanding, recognising the validity of your fears. Having been hurt once before, it was only fair that you harboured slight trust issues.

"Hey, it's alright. You have every right to still be afraid. I was just asking for fun anyway. Don't think too much about it and just... go with the flow. Whatever happens, I'll always be here for you."

She offered a comforting presence, understanding that navigating a renewed relationship with Minho required cautious steps and time for trust to be rebuilt. Your friend knew that, above all, your well-being and emotional safety mattered the most.

For your sake, Nayeon sincerely wishes your ex-boyfriend would pull himself together for good this time. If he dared hurt you again, she swears she wouldn't be standing aside just to watch again.

The campus cafeteria buzzed with activity as you and Minho shared a meal, the familiar ambience providing a comforting backdrop to your time together. Laughter filled the air as he recounted a silly story involving Jisung and Changbin, your eyes crinkling with happiness. His storytelling skills have always been a source of joy for you.

As you savoured the moment, his gaze lingered on you. He marvelled at how pretty you looked, your eyes sparkling with genuine happiness. It was a sight that warmed his heart and fueled his determination to make you smile every day.

Throughout the meal, his attentiveness spoke volumes. He helped you with your tray, wiped your lips after a messy bite, and rushed to get you some water when you accidentally choked on a bite. These gestures were new, a stark contrast to the Minho of the past.

Biting your lip shyly, you asked the question that lingered in your mind, "Minho, where did you suddenly learn to be so sweet?"

His eyes softened as he met your gaze, a warmth radiating from within, "I guess I realised that being sweet is just a small way of showing how much I care. I've missed out on these simple moments before, and I don't want to make that mistake again. You deserve all the sweetness in the world."

Minho's sincerity tugged at your heartstrings, and a gentle smile curved your lips. It was a moment of revelation, a tangible sign that he had indeed changed.

As you both finished up your meal, the afternoon sun bathed the campus in a warm glow, prompting you to take a leisurely stroll together. His company was enjoyable, and you found yourself stealing glances at him, catching him suppressing a smile. A silent giggle escaped you, a sign that maybe, just maybe, things were truly different this time.

Perhaps you could trust him again.

But the dream-like state shattered when another girl's voice echoed through the air, calling his name. You turned to see a beaming girl running excitedly toward him.

"It really is you, Lee Minho!" She squealed, throwing her arms around his shoulders. Your heart sank as you witnessed his automatic response, arms circling her back. Suddenly, you felt like a third wheel interrupting their unexpected reunion.

His wide eyes shifted to you in panic as he registered your sunken expression. Quickly pulling away from the girl, he stammered, "Oh gosh, um... let me introduce you both. This is Dahyun, my old high school classmate. Dahyun, I want you to meet—" She cut him off, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

"Why did you leave out the most important part? Did you forget I was also your first love, hm? You used to follow me around like a lost puppy." She laughed, and you lowered your head at the revelation. It felt like a blow, the realisation that perhaps Minho had always been sweet but not exclusively to you.

As you stood there, silently processing their reunion, the dynamics of your relationship with him seemed to shift once again.

Minho, realising the awkward tension in the air and sensing your discomfort, took a deep breath, "Dahyun, please, you never let me finish my sentences." He sighed, trying to steer the conversation back on track.

When he finally gave her your name and attempted to introduce you, he was interrupted by your abrupt interjection.

"She's my—" Minho started, but you cut him off with a forced smile, "Friend. I'm his friend. It seems like you two could use some time to catch up. Let me just excuse myself; I have somewhere else to be." You muttered, smiling politely at Dahyun before turning away. You didn't want to hear another word from him.

As you walked away, a mix of emotions swirled within you. The unexpected encounter had dredged up insecurities and memories you thought were buried. His past with Dahyun felt like a spectre haunting the progress you made. With each step, you hoped the distance would provide clarity, a moment to compose yourself away from the unsettling situation.

Minho watched you go with a pained expression, worried about what might be going through your mind. Dahyun, oblivious to the impact of her arrival, continued to chat animatedly, unaware of the emotional storm she had stirred.

In the aftermath of the encounter, the walls that Minho had painstakingly helped you tear down over the past few months seemed to rebuild themselves. It was disheartening to witness all that effort crumble, all thanks to Kim Dahyun's perfectly timed appearance.

He later discovered that she was only at your university for a limited time—a mere semester, partaking in a short exchange programme to explore modules unavailable at her own university a few states away. The revelation brought a mix of relief and frustration. Relief, as her stay was temporary, and frustration at the havoc she had unintentionally wreaked on your relationship.

Minho found himself struggling with the consequences of Dahyun's exaggerated claims, particularly her assertion that he had chased her during high school. In reality, he vividly recalled only harbouring a slight crush and being slightly shy around her—nothing as extreme as she made it out to be.

If only you knew the truth, if only you would allow me to explain the misunderstanding.

Each passing day felt like an uphill battle for him as he navigated the delicate balance between respecting your space and desperately wanting to clarify the situation.

Despite the challenges, he was determined to break through the walls that had reemerged. He hoped for a chance to convey the truth, to assure you that his past with his old classmate was far less dramatic than it had been painted. Grappling with these thoughts, he couldn't shake the sinking feeling that the connection you both had worked so hard to rebuild might be slipping away once again.

Even with the emotional turmoil and the growing chasm between you both, he found himself unable to turn Dahyun down whenever she invited him to lunch or sought his company. After all, she was a good friend, only unaware that her presence was unwittingly costing him his second chance with his dream girl.

While you maintained your distance, steadfastly refusing to talk, Minho spent his free time with Dahyun. He took her around campus, offering guided tours and helping her adapt to the surroundings. He introduced her to new friends, patiently navigating the delicate balance between his commitments to her and the desire to repair the rift between you and him.

In his mind, he told himself that he would only dedicate this time and effort until Dahyun had enough friends to navigate campus life on her own. Once she established her own support system, he would redirect all his time and efforts back toward bridging the gap with you.

Meanwhile, you scoffed in disbelief each time you spotted Minho accompanying Dahyun around campus.

It seemed like he was always by her side, leaving you with a growing sense of abandonment. The person who had once promised to dedicate himself to rebuilding what was broken between you now appeared to have forgotten your existence entirely.

You kept your frustration and hurt within, attempting to convince yourself that he was simply fulfilling his role as a friend to Dahyun. But the final straw came when you overheard some classmates gossiping about what seemed like a love triangle involving the three of you.

"I thought she and Minho were finally getting back together until that Dahyun girl showed up. Apparently, she was his first love? I guess first loves really are unforgettable, huh? Damn, imagine being nothing more than a rebound like that." One of your classmates remarked in a hushed tone in the library.

The words cut through you like a knife, confirming the fears and insecurities that had been festering within.

The assumption that you were nothing more than a rebound left a bitter taste in your mouth, and the realisation that others were witnessing the unravelling of your relationship added to the pain.

Huh, guess that explains it then.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you tried to maintain composure in the public space of the library. The weight of being perceived as a secondary option, especially after the effort you had put into rebuilding with Minho, felt like an unbearable burden.

Rushing back to your dorm, you unexpectedly ran right into your ex-boyfriend, of all people, on the way. Cursing under your breath, you tried to avoid his concerned gaze, but he stepped in your way, preventing you from escaping the confrontation.

"Why are you crying? What happened? Who hurt you? Just say the name, and I'll deal with that bastard." His initial concern turned into anger as he noticed the tears in your eyes. You pushed him away by the chest, frustration and hurt evident in your voice.

"It's you, Minho! You're the bastard! It all makes sense now..." He furrowed his brows, trying to make sense of your words, "What does?"

You let out a humourless laugh, bitterness lacing your tone, "That I'm nothing more than a rebound to you. First loves truly are unforgettable, aren't they? Ever since Dahyun's here, it seems I've become invisible again."

He felt a surge of hurt at the accusation, "What? That's not true! Well, what the hell was I supposed to do if you won't even talk to me?! Dahyun's new here, and she doesn't have any friends aside from me! Is it so wrong of me to look after her?"

Minho took deep breaths, attempting to calm himself despite his typically bad temper. He fought against the rising anger, not wanting to unleash it on you. Your accusations, however, struck a nerve, and the fury he had been holding back began to surface. He felt a deep sense of wronging, especially considering all the effort he put into trying to rebuild the connection with you.

"You know what?" He finally spoke, his voice cold and edged with frustration, "If you truly have that little trust in me, perhaps there's no point in trying to fix this at all. It seems like no matter how hard I work, you'll only doubt me in the end." With those words, he turned away and stalked off, leaving the unresolved tension lingering in the air between you.

The emotional storm had taken its toll, and both of you were left grappling with the aftermath of a confrontation that only seemed to widen the gap further.

Tears streamed down your cheeks as you stood there, the weight of his words sinking in. It felt like another breakup, and you couldn't shake off the overwhelming sense of defeat that washed over you. At that moment, it became painfully clear that the glimmer of hope for reconciliation had faded.

I knew it was too good to be true.

Walking away from the scene, Minho battled with his own internal turmoil. Guilt weighed heavily on him for uttering those harsh words, especially when he didn't mean them. The anger that fueled his outburst now turned into a deep regret, knowing he hurt you again.

As he replayed the heated exchange in his mind, he prayed desperately that you would somehow understand that those words were spoken in anger, not reflective of his true feelings.

He beat himself up for losing control, realising the immense challenge he now faced in earning back your trust. The question echoed in his mind: How was he ever going to make things right and rebuild what seemed irreparably broken?

The days that followed were absolute hell.

To you, it felt like the end, the finality of his words still echoing in your mind. For Minho, it was a desperate struggle to convey that it was just another mistake, a momentary lapse fueled by anger. The weight of the misunderstanding hung heavy on him, and he navigated each day with a sense of urgency to make things right.

Dahyun finally took notice of his distressed state and decided to inquire, "Dude, you good? What's with you lately, man?"

Heaving a deep sigh, he decided to open up and share the entire saga from the very beginning. As she processed the information, her jaws slowly dropped, realising the unintended trouble her words had caused, "Crap, I'm so sorry for my big mouth! If only I knew, I'd never say those things." She exclaimed, slapping a palm on her forehead.

Minho nodded in defeat, "Yeah, I know that. The problem is that she doesn't. She truly believes there's something going on between us and that she's only a rebound. I mean, how can she even think that? I... God, Dahyun, I love her so much, and I just wish she could see that."

He hid his face in his hands, feeling utterly hopeless. He just wanted you back, and the difficulty of the situation weighed heavily on him.

Feeling a sense of responsibility, Dahyun pulled him close and patted his back, "There, there. You should've told me sooner. I could've spoken to her and clarified everything then. You're an idiot."

He chuckled, squeezing her arm, "You're right, I am an idiot. You'll still help me though, right?"

She rolled her eyes, "Duh! I have to clean up the mess I made. There's no way I'd be able to return in peace if you don't get your girlfriend back by the end of this semester."

As if the universe conspired against Minho, you happened to catch sight of him and Dahyun in an embrace just as he bared his soul to her. Your heart clenched at the sight, the painful realisation of seeing him openly in another woman's arms, something he had never done with you, not even in private.

Nayeon approached you with narrowed eyes, seething at the sight of you being hurt again. Determined to help you get over him, she swung her arm over your shoulder, pulling you away, "Oh, forget him. I know a perfect way to move on. There's this party tonight, and you're coming with me."

You shook your head, "Not like that, Nayeon. I don't—" She sighed, "Look, I'm not asking you to hook up with some random stranger. Just let loose and have some fun, alright?"

As a self-proclaimed goody-two-shoes who had never been to a party, the idea was unfamiliar. But the prospect of trying something new appealed to you at that moment, "Oh, what the hell, let's do it." You said with a half-hearted cheer, and she immediately led you back to your dorm to get ready for the night ahead.

You momentarily forgot all about Minho as you stepped into the crowded frat house for the first time, pulling at the ends of the short and tight-fitting mini dress that Nayeon forced you into. You begged her to let you put a cardigan over it, and she only agreed after you threatened not to go.

So, here you were, clutching onto your roommate's hand as she led you inside.

Your eyes rounded at the sight of horny young adults grinding against one another, holding cups of assorted alcohol in their hands. The pulsating music thudded through your chest as you tried to navigate through the sea of bodies.

Nayeon, undeterred by the chaos, pulled you deeper into the party, determined to make you forget about the heartache waiting outside those doors.

Sensing your discomfort, she took you to the kitchen, where you each grabbed a cup of drink before leading you towards a quieter area by the pool in the backyard, where a few groups of friends and couples were lounging about.

She sat you down by the pool, "Hey, are you alright staying here by yourself for a bit? I'll be back real quick."

Following her line of sight, you see her classmates waving at her from inside. You nodded immediately, "Sure, go on."

Left alone, you took a deep breath, trying to take in the surreal atmosphere of the party. The cool breeze from the pool provided a welcome contrast to the heat inside, and the dim lights cast a gentle glow on the water. You sipped your drink nervously, wondering how you'd ended up at a party like this.

As you looked around, you spotted a group of people playing beer pong nearby, and your attention was drawn to a familiar face in the crowd. Minho was there, laughing and joking with a few guys, seemingly carefree.

The sight twisted a knife in your gut, but you quickly reminded yourself that you were here to have fun and move on.

You looked away from your ex and squeezed your eyes shut. Of course, he had to be here too. If you knew he'd be here, you wouldn't have come. At the thought, you chugged the drink and finished it in one go. Perhaps you shouldn't have done that; you rarely ever touched alcohol, and that brave but stupid action was quick to send you into a wave of dizziness.

The world seemed to spin around you as you steadied yourself by gripping the edge of the pool. You took a few deep breaths, attempting to regain your composure.

The night air felt colder than before, and the distant sound of music blended with the murmur of partygoers.

Just as you were contemplating whether to find Nayeon or head back to the dorm, someone approached you from behind, "Hey, you okay?" A gentle voice cut through the haze, and you turned to see a friendly face, a guy offering a concerned smile, "You looked like you needed a break."

Grateful for the distraction, you managed a nod and attempted a small smile, "Yeah, just needed some fresh air." The stranger chuckled, understanding, "It gets overwhelming in there sometimes. I'm Doyoung, by the way. Mind if I join you for a bit?"

You agreed, and as you sat by the pool chatting with Doyoung, you found that the night might not be as dreadful as you initially thought.

Thanks to your tipsy state, you were a much better conversationalist than you'd be sober. You jumped from topic to topic with him, suddenly discussing constellations as you both marvelled at the night sky, "So beautiful, isn't it?" While your eyes remained on the stars illuminating the sky, Doyoung's eyes went to you, "Not as beautiful as you are."

You blinked at the sudden pickup line, turning to him in surprise. It was then that he began to lean in for what seemed like a kiss. You gasped, and your hands shot up to his chest to stop him. It felt wrong, even when you and Minho weren't together.

No, I can't do this.

"Wait, wait. I can't." You stammered, pulling back.

Doyoung immediately straightened up, concern etching his features, "Did I misread the situation? I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable."

You shook your head, feeling a mix of embarrassment and gratitude, "It's not you, really. I just... I can't. Not right now."

He nodded understandingly, offering a reassuring smile, "No need to apologise. If you need some space, I totally get it. I'm here if you want to talk or anything."

Flustered, you pulled yourself up and stumbled into the party in search of Nayeon. After what happened, it was too awkward to continue sitting with Doyoung. Unbeknownst to you, Minho had witnessed the whole exchange. His heart nearly stopped when he saw the stranger lean in to kiss you, only to sigh in relief when you pushed him away.

That's my girl.

His worries didn't stop when he saw you stumbling into the house. He realised you must have been affected by the alcohol. You don't usually drink, so one cup here must be a lot for you. He pushed his way through people to reach you; he needed to know you were safe.

Panicking, Minho loses sight of you in the crowd, anxiously weaving through the party in search of you.

His heart races as he spots Nayeon, hope flickering in his eyes, but it fades when he sees you're not with her. Approaching your roommate, he urgently asks about your whereabouts.

Nayeon rolls her eyes in irritation at his presence, "She's at the pool, you doofus. Don't you dare disturb her, you've done more than enough."

Minho groans in frustration, "No, she's not! I saw her; she got drunk and came in here looking for you!"

Her eyes widen at that revelation, "She what?! Holy shit, we've gotta find her!" Realising the seriousness of the situation, Nayeon grabs Minho by the arm, leading him towards the pool area.

Minho's mind races with guilt and worry. He knew he had to find you and make sure you were safe, no matter what it took. Nayeon, despite her annoyance with your ex, couldn't ignore the urgency in his voice. The two hurriedly make their way through the crowd, desperately searching for any sign of you.

As you swayed around in your drunken state, desperately searching for your friend, you clumsily bumped into a guy dancing nearby. Slurring your words, you apologised and attempted to walk away. But the stranger, eyeing you up and down, licked his lips and tugged on your arm.

"Are you alright, sweetheart? You need any help?" He asked, glancing around to check if you were alone. In your intoxicated state, you nodded, "Yes... I'm looking for my friend..."

The guy smirked, wrapping an arm around you, "Come on, I'll help you find your friend." Trustingly, you let him lead you away. Fortunately for you, Minho's friends had caught sight of the situation and rushed to alert him.

Your ex's heart pounded as his friends informed him of your predicament. Panic and anger surged through him as he pushed through the crowd, desperately trying to reach you before anything bad could happen. The thought of you being led away by a stranger sent chills down his spine, and he couldn't forgive himself for losing sight of you in the first place.

Minho, Nayeon, Chan, and Jisung rushed up the stairs, frantically searching through the rooms while apologising to the occupants whenever they accidentally intruded on private moments. Your ex's anxiety reached its peak as he imagined the worst scenarios.

Finally, he burst into a room and saw you struggling weakly against a stranger who was trying to force himself on you.

Rage boiled inside him as he roared, "You bastard, take your hands off her!" With a surge of strength, he pulled the guy away before delivering a furious punch to the pervert's face. The assailant crumpled to the ground as Minho's friends rushed to restrain him and drag him downstairs for further action.

Nayeon, crying apologetically, quickly helped you put your cardigan back on and fix your dress which was thankfully still intact. It meant that the guy hadn't been able to go too far.

Minho's protective instincts flared, regretting every moment that led to this situation. He wished he could turn back time and prevent the chain of events that caused you harm. The realisation of how close he came to losing you again struck him like a lightning bolt, and he vowed silently to do whatever it took to protect you from now on.

His rage simmered beneath the surface as he approached you, "I swear I'll kill him for you if you want me to, just say the word." He offered with a fierce determination in his eyes.

Without hesitation, you wrapped your arms around his neck, seeking comfort and safety. He sighed and embraced you tightly, cradling the back of your head with a hand, his warmth a soothing balm against your distress.

"I just want you to stay with me, please," You whimpered, your vulnerability palpable. He nodded reassuringly, "Of course, I'll stay with you forever." His words were a promise, and as you sobbed against him, you found solace in the safety of his arms.

Nothing else mattered as you melted into his embrace, the reassurance of his presence was all you needed at that moment.

Nayeon stood aside, her eyes filled with tearful remorse. Regret weighed heavily on her heart as she realised the gravity of her misguided decision to bring you to the party.

Despite your roommate's endless apologies for the ill-fated party, you found it in your heart to forgive her. You understood that she didn't mean any harm and that her intentions were only to provide you with an opportunity to unwind.

The incident also served as a catalyst for Minho to open up and share the truth with you, dispelling the misunderstandings that had clouded your relationship. You appreciated his honesty and efforts to bridge the gaps of miscommunication. It was a relief to finally put the past behind you once and for all.

To your surprise, Dahyun took the initiative to approach you, expressing sincere apologies for all the trouble her actions may have caused. She acknowledged the unintended consequences of her presence and was genuinely remorseful. The air was finally cleared, and you felt a sense of closure as the people around you worked to mend the aftermath of the unfortunate events.

Now that all that drama was over, you, Minho, Dahyun, and Nayeon have begun to hang out a lot more. Amused by the newfound friendship between Dahyun and Nayeon, you were surprised at how well the two got along. It seemed that the universe had decided to align things in a peculiar but delightful manner.

As the four of you hung out at the student lounge one day, Dahyun and Nayeon exchanged mischievous glances. They seemed to share some secret plan that you were not privy to. Oblivious to their scheming, you were engrossed in working on an assignment, busily typing away on your laptop.

Noticing Minho's dreamy gaze fixed on you, Dahyun and Nayeon decided it was time to play matchmakers. With a feigned excuse, they both left the student lounge, giving you and him some unexpected alone time. You glanced up, your eyes rounding as you watched them saunter away with knowing looks.

Cheeks flushing, you turned your attention back to Minho, only to realise that his eyes had been glued to you the entire time. The atmosphere shifted as you caught each other's gaze.

He chuckled at the sight of your pink cheeks, "Don't mind me, get back to your work. I'll be here, no one will dare disturb you."

Feeling a mix of emotions, you bit your lip shyly as he patted your head reassuringly. His sweet words caught you off guard, creating a warmth that spread through you. You nodded, appreciating the comfort he provided, and tried to focus on your work despite the fluttering in your heart.

Meanwhile, Minho's phone vibrated in his pocket, and he retrieved it to find a text from Dahyun. She playfully urged him to seize the opportunity to finally ask you the question, threatening to unfriend him if he continued to stall any longer. He chuckled at her straightforwardness, appreciating the push from his friend.

Don't worry, Dahyun. I will.

Later that night, the moon hung high in the night sky, casting a soft glow over the campus as Minho and you strolled back from a delightful dinner. The air was crisp, and the only sounds that accompanied your footsteps were the rustling of leaves in the gentle breeze.

As you reached the entrance of your dorm, you exchanged casual goodbyes, "Thanks for the meal, Minho. I'll see you tomorrow."

But his hand reached out to gently grasp your wrist, halting your steps. You turned to look at him, a question forming on your lips, but the sincerity in his eyes silenced any words you might have spoken.

It's now or never.

His voice carried a vulnerability that echoed in the quiet night, "Wait... before you go," Minho began, his grip on your wrist gentle yet firm. The dim light highlighted the earnestness in his expression, "There's something I must ask you. I... I can't hold it in any longer. I've wasted too much time, made you wait too long. I'm sorry it took me this long to pull myself together."

A hushed apology hung in the air, and his eyes bore into yours, seeking understanding and forgiveness. He took a deep breath, his fingers now intertwining with yours as he continued, "But I promise you'll never have to wait anymore. I want to give you all the love you deserve, if only you'll let me."

The weight of his words settled between you, and the atmosphere became charged with anticipation. His gaze held a mixture of hope and determination as he finally posed the question that lingered in the night air.

"Would you... be my girlfriend again?"

Your heart skipped a beat at that. His sincerity was palpable, and the emotion in his eyes reflected the depth of his feelings. As he reached for both of your hands, looking into your hopeful and waiting eyes. A mixture of emotions welled up within you, but in that moment, you decided to let go of the past and embrace the possibility of a new beginning.

A soft smile played on your lips as you nodded, "Yes, Minho. I'd love to be your girlfriend again."

The relief and happiness that washed over his face mirrored your own feelings. It was a fresh start, and you both hoped that this time around, your love story would be written with more understanding, appreciation, and commitment to make it last.

Minho's eyes glistened with tears of joy as your response echoed through the night, "Thank you for giving me a second chance." The weight that had burdened him for so long seemed to lift, and a sense of completeness washed over him.

You were his again, and this time, he vowed to cherish and protect what he once took for granted.

With a tender smile, he pulled you close, his hands cupping your face as if it were the most delicate thing in the world. His touch was gentle, a silent promise to treat your heart with the care and respect it deserved. Stroking your cheeks softly, his gaze traced every feature of your face, committing the moment to memory.

As he leaned in, the world around you seemed to fade away. The soft glow of the moon witnessed the rekindling of a love that had weathered storms. When your eyes fluttered closed, he knew he had your permission. With a heart full of love, he pressed his lips against yours in a tender, lingering kiss.

The sweet moment between you was abruptly interrupted by the sound of hyena-like laughter and cheers echoing from somewhere upstairs. You both pulled away from the kiss, exchanging a confused glance before shifting your attention upward. To your surprise, Dahyun and Nayeon were peeking out from your room window, their faces illuminated by mischievous grins and excitement.

"About damn time you losers got back together again!" Nayeon's voice carried down, a teasing and joyful proclamation.

You scoffed at her playful comment, but soon, laughter bubbled up within you. The infectious mirth spread and even Minho couldn't resist the grin that crept across his face.

Amused by the unexpected audience, you raised an eyebrow at your friends, but the two continued to wave excitedly. The embarrassment was quickly replaced by shared laughter, and Minho, unable to contain his joy, pulled you back into his arms. Nestling his face into your neck, he joined in the laughter, grateful for the unexpected cheerleaders celebrating your reunion.

The warmth of the night, the laughter, and the realisation that you were surrounded by friends who genuinely cared enveloped you. At that moment, it felt like the world was cheering for your love, and as you held Minho close, you marvelled at the twists and turns that had led you back into each other's arms.

The weeks that followed your reunion were filled with joy, laughter, and a renewed sense of love. As the two of you navigated the challenges and joys of being together again, Minho's friends noticed the significant change in their once aloof and distant friend.

In the cosy confines of their dorm, your boyfriend found himself smiling like a lovestruck fool at a text you sent him. His friends, keenly aware of the shift in his demeanour, couldn't resist teasing him.

"Hey, Minho, you're grinning at your phone like you just won the lottery." Chan remarked, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

Seungmin joined in, "I thought I'd never see the day when Minho hyung here turns into a cheesy romantic."

Minho, feigning annoyance and irritation, shot back, "Can't a guy be happy without getting interrogated by the peanut gallery?"

Changbin laughed, "Come on, hyung, spill it. What's got you all smiley?"

As the laughter died down, Jisung, always a bit more sentimental, chimed in, "You know, I've known Minho hyung for a long time. It's kinda nice to see him like this. He's genuinely happy, and I'm proud of him."

Your boyfriend's eyes flickered with a mixture of gratitude and bashfulness. Despite his attempts to maintain a cool exterior, the genuine happiness radiating from him betrayed his true emotions. His friends, understanding the significance of the moment, raised their cups in a subtle toast, acknowledging the positive change that love had brought to their friend's life.

Love had not only rekindled the romance between you both but also transformed him into a happier and more open version of himself.

You and Minho strolled through the lively streets of the town one evening, basking in the warm glow of streetlights and the subtle hum of life around you. The air was filled with a sense of contentment, an unspoken understanding that everything was right in the world.

As you explored different shops and enjoyed each other's company, he found it increasingly difficult to keep his hands to himself. In the beginning, his public displays of affection were modest – a handhold here, a gentle touch there. But as your relationship blossomed, so did his boldness.

While queuing to buy a famous dessert, he couldn't resist pulling you close, his arms enveloping you from behind. He pressed soft kisses to your head, cheeks, and neck, causing you to giggle at the ticklish sensation. Playfully, you turned around and pushed him lightly by the chest, "Enough, Minho, we're in public."

He held your waist, a mischievous glint in his eyes, and raised a brow, "And?" The audacity of his actions surprised you, and your eyes widened at the newfound boldness. But before you could react further, he let out a carefree laugh, enjoying the new dynamics of your relationship.

As you continued your evening stroll, he couldn't help worrying if his sudden boldness was pushing the boundaries of your comfort. Later on, with a genuine concern in his eyes, he asked, "Is it too much, baby? I can tone it down if it makes you uncomfortable."

Your heart warmed at his thoughtfulness.

You shook your head, a smile playing on your lips, and pecked him on the lips, "Never." His smile widened, reassured by your response, and he kissed you again, not caring about whoever might be watching. The world seemed to fade away as he pulled away slightly, his lips brushing against yours.

"I love you," He whispered, his eyes locked onto yours, seeking confirmation. Your heart swelled at the sincerity of his words, and finally, after everything you'd been through, you felt the weight lift off your shoulders, "I love you too, Minho." You replied, sealing the sentiment with a sweet, lingering kiss.

If someone told you months ago that Lee Minho would transform into a person so affectionate, you wouldn't have believed them.

Yet here he was, breaking free from his reserved shell and embracing love with open arms. You, for one, were just glad that his heart was no longer a mystery. Now more than ever, you were certain it belonged completely to you.

Damn, this ended up longer than I expected.

Ngl, I was this close to deleting this at some point. I drafted and scrapped my initial writings for about 3 times. I had this wonderful idea but struggled so much to put it into words.

I tried working on this again after a break and voila, finally managed to complete it. It's my first full-length fic in a while, hope it's decent! Thank you for reading and let me know your thoughts! <3

All Rights Reserved © edenesth // DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE, PLAGIARISE OR REPURPOSE.

#stray kids #stray kids fanfic #stray kids fanfiction #stray kids lee know #stray kids minho #non idol au #exes to lovers #minho x reader #minho x you #lee know x reader #lee know x you #stray kids fic #stray kids oneshot

[suchawrathfullamb]

For a show that talks so much about time, I love that it has so many alternative paths it could have followed. One of my favorites is Hannibal, back when Will was sick, back when his mind was enamored by the aroma of a sweet fever, drawing in his office, one afternoon. His focus slips as he sharpens the pencil and it slits his wrist. He looks at the droplets of blood on the paper, they fell on his rendition of Will's face, smudging the eyes, trailing off his chest. He looks at his wrist, the cut seductively close to the artery. And that's it. In a blur of time he has elevated death to art, grabbed the suitcase he left inside of a closet, his always prepared suitcase for a life like his, and he is in the hallway of the office, looking back at the door, legs hesitating to leave, and he grabs his phone.

"Hey," Will answers, and just the sound of his voice takes the breath away from Hannibal. "Hannibal?"

"I love you," he decides, yes, decides, to say. Because it's over, because he is over, and because Will deserves to know.

"What? Are you okay? Where are you?" Will's voice shows his escalating worry and Hannibal realizes his own sounds shaky and terrified.

"I wanted to say goodbye," he tells him, unable to contain his emotions and allowing them to overflow because this is the last time. This is ending. So it's okay.

"What? What do you mean? Are you hurt? Tell me where you are," Will demands, and he can hear him saying "I think he's in danger" to someone, likely Jack.

"I'm in love with you. I've never been in love before," he tells him with the boldness granted by blood loss and goodbyes.

When he hangs up, he ties the final knots, but when he finally reaches the final steps, Will is suddenly there, in front of him, grabbing him by the shoulders.

"Hannibal! Are you okay? What happened? You're bleeding, what happened to you?" he sounds desperate and anxious in that way he always used to back then.

"You did. You happened to me," Hannibal says with a smile, but it's sad and almost resigned.

This makes Will look at him devastated. Taken aback. He even releases Hannibal's shoulders and stumbles back.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Will thinks someone attacked him, someone tied to him, because of him.

"The Ripper, was it the Ripper?" he asks, and Hannibal chuckles because he can't help it.

"This was an accident."

"Then why are you leaving? What does this have to do with you leaving?"

"You ruined me. I will ruin myself if I stay."

"Ruined you? I ruined you?" Will is so hurt, it's evident in his face, he wants to cry.

"I don't blame you. I don't think you can help it."

This makes more hurt form on Will's face. And Hannibal doesn't want to hurt him like this, so he adds, "Being so lovely", which makes Will frown slightly in that way that is so his.

"You're leaving because you...You fell in love with me?"

"Yes."

"No. No, please, don't. Please don't leave me," Will comes forward, his eyes beginning to water more intensely. Hannibal holds his heart mentally, because he feels it falling down.

"You're the only stable thing in my life right now, please, don't go," he's begging now, he's genuinely dreading the loss.

Hannibal brings his hand to Will's face, gently stroking his cheek, because yes, let me feel you for this last time.

"You're so warm, you're always so warm," Hannibal whispers, almost musing. "I can't stay."

"Why not?"

"Because when I look at you, I see you. And I love all of it. All of things I see in you. All of them," he empathizes, hoping the unspoken words will speak what he's trying to avoid, "But I can't handle you looking at me with the same disgust you look at yourself."

Tears are set free from Will's eyes, and he frowns again.

"What do you mean? Please tell me what's going on," he begs.

"You'll see. Soon."

He leaves, Will follows him, begging please no, don't leave me, but finally gives up. And when Hannibal's car is out of sight, Will goes back into the office, and is greeted by a tableau on the other side of the door.

#this is insane #this was meant to be a normal headcanon #but then it exploded out of me #anyway #hannigram #nbc hannibal #hannibal #will graham #murder husbands #hannibal lecter #hugh dancy #mads mikkelsen #fanfic

[jewishvitya]

I just wanted to thank you so much for all of your insight and generosity with your perspective as an anti-zionist israeli, something you absolutely don't owe us but I feel immense amounts of respect and admiration for. from an American jew, it's been so valuable to know there are people like you out there, it's made everything feel much less hopeless despite all the hopelessness. I've felt very alone recently, surrounded by all the Jewish people in my life who are pro-israel and don't seem to grasp the gravity of the situation and my pro-palestine gentile friends, and I've felt very alone in my grief as I've only really started to unpack and dismantle my own biases very recently. reading your posts and your perspective on everything has just made me feel very seen as a jew in this situation, especially as I try to reconcile my feelings about everything going on with my own feelings about my faith and my identity.

you've probably seen that I've gone through a lot of your posts and that I've followed you. i just want you to know that I'm not necessarily following you just for that, I know you're just a fandom blog, it's just that after looking through your posts I feel like you're just a really nice person and seeing yoi on my dash from you would be endearing coming from you even though im not into it myself.

just. thank you again for sharing your story and continuing to share. you have no idea how much it's helped me.

I'm in tears. I've been crying way more than usual over the past couple of months, but it's nice for a change to have those tears to come from being touched instead of grief. I apologize if I'm going to ramble.

You say I didn't owe you all this, but I do feel responsible. I'm watching so much destruction and seeing how comfortable people around me are with the loss of life. This is why I've been talking about what we do and not as much about the impact of October 7 on me or people I know. I did a bit of that in the beginning, but pretending it was the start of everything to keep going back to that one day, after two months of horror, as if I can't count past 7... I didn't choose to be born where I am, I didn't choose to grow up in the most extremist community this place has to offer. But since I'm here, since I'm comfortable at the expense of Palestinians and violence is being done in my name and I have the tools to highlight issues within my society, I think it's a moral obligation.

I know how I talk about things here, and that's genuinely because I don't want to minimize the severity of the racism and the nationalism in Israel. And someone perceived my words as showing hatred for Israelis. But... I love my people. I don't expect those who see or experience our violence to feel the same or even understand me, but I do. It's my neighbors and my childhood friends and my family. It's children I see playing outside and getting excited when they see I have a cat, and the random people who stop me in the street and give me directions if they think I look lost.

Even growing up in the West Bank settlements, the people were very good to me. I needed years to internalize the fact that this kindness doesn't get extended to you if you're not part of the in-group. It broke my heart. It still does. Seeing people who I know are capable of kindness and compassion, hardening themselves against the pain of other human beings. Closing their eyes and telling themselves it isn't real. It's all an act.

I told a friend I feel like I'm betraying my mom, who was deeply bigoted, but also a wonderful mother. She taught me a lot of the principles that are guiding me now - I just took down the walls she put around who deserves to be considered. She'd be horrified with seeing the things I'm saying if she was still alive. But she taught me to care about people, I just decided it means all people.

Everyone should be prioritizing Palestinian liberation, and at the same time, I care about this too. I care about the morality of my people. I need us to be better than this. I want to dismantle the nationalism that teaches us hate and violence so we can start to heal and come to terms with what we did (and still do) here. I want us to fix what we can and hold ourselves accountable. I want us to reimagine safety in a way that doesn't cause harm, and build good relationships with the rest of humanity. Every marginalized community is experiencing bigotry in interactions with every other community, that's just how these things work. But I believe healing the world, and healing my society, is possible.

And it's hard, because so much of what we learn is rooted in truth. Antisemitism is real. Millennia of persecution are real. The trauma we carry is real. If the idea of an ethnostate makes us feel safe, and the idea of losing it makes us scared, how do we differentiate between fear as a natural reaction to antisemitic violence and fear that was taught to us for the sake of nationalism? Especially those of us living in Israel, immersed in the propaganda. It doesn't matter in practice, our feelings of safety or fear don't justify an ethnostate, especially not one built on top of another nation, but it matters for the conversations I have with people.

And I said that the violence I'm seeing feels like an attack on my identity. Seeing a giant hannukiyah in Gaza, when Hannukah tells the story of occupied people fighting off their oppressors. Seeing images that echo so much of the horrors that were done to us. The Magen David being used with hate and spite. It's all so painful. And I love this land, it's the only home I've known, so seeing us destroying nature and soaking it with blood and calling that connection?

Judaism does guide me here. The concept of tikkun olam. The idea of לא עליך המלאכה לגמור ולא אתה בין חורין לבטל ממנה - doing what I can, even if what I'm able to do isn't some decisive blow that entirely turns the tide. The idea that every human being is a whole entire world, to me it means that every single person alive is worth fighting for. So no matter how much death I see, there's still worlds more to save.

And Jewitches had this post that felt just healing to read. Nationalism hijacked our culture, and it will always leave a mark for centuries into the future. But I'm not letting go, and I'm not letting that create a rift between me and thousands of years full of history I can be proud of.

I feel your grief. And I'm grateful for the anti-zionist Jews I met by talking about this, because honestly, I need you people in my life. The pain and the anger are both easier to hold together.

So, thank you for following. I might follow back, just to see you around on my feed. And thank you for sending this. Feel free to message me anytime for any reason (I promise it won't result in a lecture every time).

Also, your url gave me pjo nostalgia

#riki babbles

[softhairedhotch]

this one to me feels much more oc-like than a reader-insert (bc of all the details i added) but a few of yous said to keep it as a reader fic so i hope this is okay!! don't hate me if you can't relate to it please n thanks <3 also sorry for the weird formatting of my fics/the random bold or italics or small text idk tumblr hates me and keeps doing it!!! comfortember day five: treehouse (+day eight: grief/mourning) aaron hotchner x gender neutral reader aaron is there for you, just like he always is, after you lose your mother. word count: 2.1k warnings/content: parent loss, death of reader's mother, hurt/comfort, some emotional conversations and sad topics, mentions of crying, pet names, kissing, hugging, established relationship. lyrics that inspired this: "do not enter" is written on the doorway / why can't everyone just go away / except you / you can stay / what do you think of my treehouse? / it's where i sit and talk really loud / usually / i'm all by myself

comfortember masterlist here!

also on ao3!

the treehouse

You step out into the back garden and take a deep breath, closing your eyes as you allow the crisp air to wash over you. Aaron steps out moments after and closes the door quietly before his hand finds your lower back. 

"You okay?" He asks, his voice just above a whisper. It's almost drowned out by the sound of mourning doves overheard.

You shrug, your shoulders feeling as though they’re being weighed down by the heavy armour you’re trying–and failing–to shield yourself with. “I will be.”

“Yeah.” He looks around the garden and lets out a short, flat hum. “But no one is expecting you to be okay, you know that, right? There’s no time limit; you’re allowed to grieve.”

“I know.”

“I know you do, sweetheart. But I just wanted to remind you.” You turn to look at him and, at the sight of his genuine concern, your brave face crumbles. He wraps his arms around you immediately, pulling you close and enveloping you in his warmth. “Hey, it’s okay. It’s okay, I’ve got you. I’ve got you, yeah?” 

“Yeah,” you whisper as you cling to him, trying your hardest to hold back your tears but failing miserably. “I know.”

“Good.”

“I just don’t know what to do.” 

Aaron presses a kiss to your forehead. “You don’t have to do anything.”

You pull back and look up at him, confused. “Yes, I do. I have to… to get rid of everything and sell the, the house. And do all the paperwork and figure out what to do with her antiques and, and, and–”

“Hey, hey,” he interrupts you gently, pulling you back into a tight hug. “Don’t worry about any of that right now. I’ll do that.”

“What, no–”

“Let’s not talk about this now, okay? We’ll sort it out later or tomorrow. Give yourself some time to think about it.”

“But what do I do in the meantime? I can’t just… sit around.”

He thinks for a moment. “Show me around.”

“What?”

“Show me around the house. Tell me everything you can, anything you can remember, and I’ll listen. I wanna know what life was like for you.”

You almost burst into tears at his words. “Really? You wanna know about my childhood?”

“Sweetheart, I wanna know everything about you.”

***

You take Aaron inside the house, taking him to the living room. The room hasn’t been touched in a few days, save for a few files on the coffee table you checked earlier, and you feel sick at the thought of leaving the house behind once everything’s packed away. Then the thought of having to pack everything away makes you feel even worse and you sway on the spot. Aaron notices you falter and reaches out to squeeze your arm gently, standing beside you patiently. 

“I don’t know what I’m gonna do when all this is gone.”

“It doesn’t have to be gone,” he replies. “You can take it all.”

“And keep it where?”

“In our house, in a storage container… there’s many places.”

You think for a moment, holding back tears, before shaking your head. “No. I need to… to let it go. Not all of it, but I can’t keep everything. She wouldn’t wanna weigh me down with all her stuff.”

“Alright,” Aaron says, squeezing your arm again and leaning to press a soft kiss to your cheek. “Take anything you need. I promise we’ll find a place for it. That sound good?” 

You nod and lean into him for a moment before slowly making your way through the living room, grabbing the objects with the most significance to you and telling Aaron about them before sorting them into a box to take back to the house. You pack a few of your favourite DVDs, ones you’re sure won’t even play anymore with how scratched they’ve become, as you tell Aaron vague memories of watching them as a kid. What happened when you watched them, who you watched them with, how you felt–anything that comes to mind because you know he’s listening.

A few family photos are displayed on the TV stand, as well as a cabinet in the corner, and you relive the memories of when they were taken as you tell him all about them. He asks to look at one closer and you give it to him, watching as he smiles down at a photo of you with your old dog. “You looked happy.”

“I was,” you reply, nodding. “Some of the time, anyway.”

He gives you a small smile and hands you the picture. “I know what you mean.”

You continue to walk him around the house, showing him dents in the wall from where you hurt yourself and little drawings you hid behind drawers and peeling wallpaper. He listens intently, smiling at your happy anecdotes and comforting you when tears well up in your eyes as the worst memories cloud your mind. You show him your childhood bedroom, telling him about friends that used to come over for sleepovers and the first time you kissed someone behind the open door so no one would see. 

“My first kiss was with Haley,” he replies. “In the theatre room at our school.”

“Isn’t that where you first met her?”

“Yeah. I kissed her in the same spot I first saw her.”

“Aw,” you smile as you grab an old diary and throw it into your bag. You’ll read that later when you’re alone so you don’t embarrass or upset yourself anymore in front of Aaron. “You’ve always been a romantic, how cute.”

He blushes and presses a kiss to your cheek as he passes by, making his way to your desk and flicking through a few papers you left there when you were last over. “You think you’d want these?”

“Probably not, doubt they’re important.”

Aaron nods and begins to open the drawers, pulling out miscellaneous items and silently dividing them into piles of things you might want to keep and things you’d throw away. You watch him with a sombre smile, feeling your chest ache at the realisation that he knows you so well and that his love for you is endless. When he catches you watching him, he pauses and raises an eyebrow. “You okay?”

“I love you, you know that, right?” 

“Of course I do,” he replies, closing the drawer and walking back over to you, wrapping his arms around your waist to tug you close. “I love you, too. More than you’ll ever know.”

“Hm, I don’t know. I think I have a pretty good idea.”

“I don’t want to doubt you, sweetheart, but I really don’t think you do.” He presses a sweet kiss to your lips, channelling all his love into it. “I can’t even begin to express how much I love you. I just… do.”

You press another kiss to his lips to hide the tears welling up in your eyes. The love you feel for him is so strong it feels like you might burst. He kisses back, letting you take the lead. Pulling back, you look deep into his eyes and smile the first genuine smile you’ve been able to manage since you first heard the news. “I love you more.”

Aaron chuckles. “Sure you do.” He presses a chaste kiss to your lips with a hum. “Ready to carry on?” 

“Yeah,” you mutter, going to pull away before a thought strikes you and you let out a sharp breath. Aaron pulls you back into his arms immediately, looking down at you in concern but keeping silent to give you a moment to think. “Sorry, I just… realised that that was gonna be my last kiss in this room.”

“Is that a good thing? Or bad?”

“I don’t know,” you reply honestly, feeling out of it. “I don’t like the thought of everything we do in this moment being the last of anything, but… the fact that it’s you that I’m doing all this with… yeah, I think that’s a good thing.”

He smiles sweetly at you, love shining so clearly in his eyes, and presses a kiss to your forehead. “Then let's stay here for a little longer.”

“We should get it over with, I don’t wanna waste all your free time off work. You deserve to get some time to yourself.”

“Oh, honey,” he sighs, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and resting his head against yours. “This isn’t a waste of my time. Trust me. I want to be here, with you, for you, and that’s all that matters. Don’t think like that, okay? I’m here because I want to be, not because I feel like I have to. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah,” you whisper. “It does.”

***

“I guess that leaves the treehouse,” you shrug, feeling drained as you step back outside with Aaron following you. You stare up at the treehouse, wondering if it's necessary to go up there. “You don’t have to come up. It’s pretty small.”

“I’ll go wherever you go.”

“You’re so cheesy,” you say with a small smile, even when his words mean the world to you.

He smiles at you. “You love it.”

“I really do.” Making your way to the treehouse, you glance at Aaron and allow a small smirk to dance over your lips. “Don’t stare at my ass as I go up.”

Aaron laughs. “No promises.” 

You roll your eyes and begin climbing, risking a glance back to find Aaron’s eyes firmly on the ground and being as respectful as ever. It makes your heart skip a beat. Reaching the top of the ladder, you look at the treehouse's entrance and cringe at the big ‘DO NOT ENTER’ sign hanging beside the doorway. It was a sign you carved yourself when you were younger. When you look inside the treehouse, your heart aches as memories flood through you. It takes you a few seconds to force yourself inside but once you clamber in, you call down to Aaron to let him know he can join you.

The sound of him climbing up surrounds you as you push yourself into your favourite corner, one filled with soft padding and blankets. A few of your favourite books are scattered across the floor and pictures of you and your childhood friends cover the walls. The nostalgia hits you hard and you bite your lip to stifle a sob. 

Aaron joins you, crawling inside and looking around with interest. As he gets comfortable in the small space, his long legs curling against himself to fit, you realise it’s the first time anyone’s ever been in the treehouse with you. Or at all. 

He remains silent, waiting for you to be the first to talk. You appreciate that. 

“I used to come up here a lot,” you say after a few minutes. “To read, to think, to talk to myself out loud… everything.”

“And did it help?”

“Yeah,” you nod, reaching over to grab one of the books beside you. It’s one you’re sure you’ve read a million times over, the pages worn and yellowing and a small layer of dust covering the outside. “It was nice. Peaceful. Somewhere I was never bothered.”

“I had a place like that,” Aaron muses, smiling at you. “Not as personal as this, though. It was a bench a few blocks from where I grew up, hidden by a few overgrown trees. I liked it.”

“Did you go there a lot?”

“Whenever I could. Couldn’t go much in the winter because of the cold, though.”

You huffed out a laugh. “Same here. Still came here even if I meant I almost froze to death.”

His smile becomes sad but there's clear understanding in his expression. “Yeah.”

The two of you sit inside the treehouse for almost an hour, talking about whatever comes to mind. Aaron listens intently to every word you say, his comforting hand drawing patterns over your thigh and eventually over your side when you move to curl up against him. You feel yourself drifting off at one point when the exhaustion settles deep in your bones, feeling so safe and warm and loved and comforted beside him, but you force awake to finish back up in the house. 

Aaron follows you inside, as he always has and always will, and comforts you through everything that comes after that. He helps you pack up the house, assuring you over and over that you can take however many boxes you want back to the house you share with him. He sits with you for days after, mostly in silence when the grief catches up to you and you can hardly think, never once looking as if he’d rather be elsewhere. He holds your hand throughout the funeral, never once leaving your side or once letting you think for a moment that you’re ever alone. And even after it’s been weeks, months, years, since that moment, he’s there for you whenever you need a shoulder to cry on. Just like he always has been. 

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x gender neutral reader #criminal minds #aaron hotchner fanfiction #tw parent death #tw parental loss #parent death tw #comfortember #comfortember 2023

[recreationalfanfics]

Loki w a Krul Tepes! Reader

She could literally step on me and I'd say thank you-

BUT ALSO, LIKE, I NEEDED TO WRITE THESE DOWN REAL QUICK BECAUSE I'M OBSESSED W KRUL SO READER BEING SOMEONE WITH HER MANNERISMS AND MAYBE HER IMMACULATE SENSE OF STYLE. And Loki being down horrendously.

- While you might not have been a God, you were still a powerful ally to have in the battle against humanity and by that, you were going to protect humanity...After all, you and your people needed the livestock

- This is not the first time he's met you and he's very much convinced that you two are soulmates. Even though it's quite obvious that he kinda annoys you. He reminds you of a certain white-haired progenitor sometimes

- Although you wouldn't deny that when he isn't trying to disrupt your work, you've found his company enjoyable and entertaining in the past and he helped take your mind off of your duties when they felt too stressful.

- Ah, but then Ragnarok showed up and while you detested humanity and their cruelty towards you, you still sadly relied on them to survive so now you stand against the Gods and fight for humanity.

- "You know, you don't HAVE to rely on humanity, you can just drink my blood~" Loki purred, once more trying to convince you to change sides. You rolled your eyes and smiled, "You seem to be forgetting about the REST of my people who need humans to drink from."

- "Think of it as a plus! You wouldn't have to be so stressed and you'll have more time to focus on me!"

- You just walk away while trying to hide your amused chuckle from the God of Mischief.

- PLEASE, HE ABSOLUTELY LOVES TO MESS WITH ARUKANU. He'll steal your little bat creature and either threaten it playfully like how he does with Odin's birds to get your attention or he'll just be all: "If you wanna give it back, you'll have to give me a kiss~"

- Then the next thing he knows, he's on his knees and you're standing behind him, his head turned back and his violent eyes looking up into yours as your sharp nails threateningly yet gently dig them into his throat, warning him that you could rip his head off in a second.

- It's so exciting~

- NO BUT HE DOES GET JEALOUS OF THE MORTALS YOU DRINK FROM. They have the audacity to complain or look fearful and ungrateful (you don't even kill them or take too much from them) when Loki gets shivers at the very thought of you sinking your fangs into his neck.

- UGH, HE LOVES SEEING YOUR FIGHT. The God you go up against was doomed from the start, he knew that from the get go. Especially when they started to mock you and say things like: "Go back underground, little Queen. Just because you're stronger than humans doesn't mean you compare to us GODS!" and it made Loki laugh.

- "What's so amusing, Loki?"

- "Oh, nothing, Lord Zeus.~ Just the fact that I sadly think us Gods are gonna take another loss." He answers, not seemingly to upset at the idea as he watches the irrated look on your face from the words of the arrogant god.

- He also gets a thrill from how sneaky you are♡ No one else truly knows what you're thinking, not even Loki himself, and the fact you were willing to betray and turn on anyone made him absolutely certain you two were meant to be.

- When you actually decide to get into a relationship, no one knows if its because one of you are manipulating the other or if it's genuine love.

- Also, you're the only person he genuinely respects, yes he will tease you but if he's causing a fuss and you tell him to stop, he'll smile and immediately fly over to follow you like the lovesick puppy he is.

- And it is genuine love, just a twisted version of it.

- He is aware of your weakness to the sun without your UV band, so let's say that a God wants to get even with you and tries to rip it off, Loki will literally grab their hand and smile at them but there is only rage in his eyes as he's all: "I wouldn't do that if I were you~"

- People don't think you guys care about each other but if your UV band somehow broke, Loki using his cape to shield you and you're surprised but you thank him. AND THEN HE WRAPS HIS ARM AROUND YOU TO HOLD YOU CLOSE AND IF YOU TRY TO PUSH YOURSELF OFF OF HIM, HE'S ALL: "ah, ah! I'm just making sure my vampire queen is safe♡ I would hate to see you burn up." and you give up and let him use this as an excuse to cuddle you.

- And if a human talks badly about Loki, you just smile at them menacingly before being all: "Hmm, he may be a bit childish but watch the way you talk about him. He is still my lover after all."

- NAH BC AS MUCH AS HE WANTS YOU TO BITE HIM, HE WILL BITE YOU TOO. Like, just love bites that take you off gaurd and he chuckles as his teeth gently sink into your neck but then you sigh and pat his head.

- He's such a needy lover but you suppose that's what makes him endearing.

#KRUL SOLOS OKAY #I'M WORKING ON REQHESTS I SWEAR #I JUST HAD THIS IDES POP INTO MY HEAD. #Loki x reader ror #record of ragnarok #record of ragnarok x reader #ror x reader #snv x reader #ror loki x reader #ror loki #loki x reader snv #loki x reader #Owari No Seraph #Seraph of the End #Krul Tepes

[pandorasfavorite]

Hi! Can I have a Dom x Reader with the prompt of "But you gotta believe me I'm never leaving you'll never cry long as I am there"? Can you make it SUPER fluffy pls?

I Have Lost it All

AN: I love hurt/comfort it's like a addiction

What could be more embarrassing than losing a little match? After weeks of training and preparation, she just swoops in and takes everything you’ve been working for like it was easy. The loss was a feeling that is hard to describe, imagine thousands of needles prickling your entire body, reminding you of not only the physical pain but also of the fact that all the hurt was for nothing. 

The worst part of it all was that the physical pain was no match for the instant stutter of your heart, your lungs constricting with what's left of your borrowed air. You clutch your chest and you will your legs to push just a little further… to endure the stinging and ache for 5 more minutes until you can make it to a room. You push the dingy storage room door open with what’s left of your strength and you slide your body back against the door. Locking it closed with only your body weight. 

You hug your knees, letting your head loll back to hit the door, your chest constricting harshly from lack of air. Your sobs hiccuping, no hope of calming down your cries of disappointment. Your eyes are squeezed shut, only dots of white popping up behind your eyes. Your dull fingernails are digging into your pant legs, self-deprecating thoughts pushing to the front of your mind. 

You couldn't register anything aside from your own embarrassment and disappointment in yourself. The self-pity distracts you from the unsure footsteps from outside the closet. A body slumps against the other side of the closet door, and a heavy sigh as the person sits down. Then there was a small, timid knock…

Without hesitation, you sniffle and call out to the person without any real confidence, “Go away!”, you barely manage to get out. There’s silence on the other end of the door and for a small moment, you thought the person has listened to your pathetic instruction. “It’s Dom”, he says softly and just barely distant, sounding as if his head is also leaning back against the door. Your sniffles do not subside, if anything they get worse, your eyes leaking with tears. 

He was the first and last person you wanted to see, was he here to tell you that you’re out of The Judgement Day? “Please..go away”, you say weaker, anyone could hear the wobble in your voice and the tremble of your breathing. 

“I won’t- no- I can’t leave you like this”, he says through the door, fidgeting with his hands. He’s anxious to comfort you, he doesn't want to mess up something so new and genuine. You hear his words and you inhale deeply only for your intake of breath to be ripped away by another body-racking sob, finally breaking down ‘in front’ of Dom. 

“I fucked it all up” your chest burns from lack of air, “This is it for me” You were sure that this was going to be the downfall of your career. A loss like this is hard to come back from, Dominik of all people could understand your struggle. “It’s not. You’re family we won’t leave you to deal with this by yourself”, he stops fidgeting and he moves towards the door, now facing the barrier. You shake your head in disbelief, it is his word for many people. 

“You don't know that. You don’t speak for them”, you exhale with your whole body: wishing and hoping for a solution after all this. It seems as if Dominik pondered what you said for a moment, thinking about how what you said is truthful. But deep inside his heart, he was positive that he wouldn’t give up on you, not on something like this… not ever. Much like you, his words shake, nervousness at his confession rising in his throat, “No, I don’t, but you got to believe me when I say I'm never leaving. You’ll never cry as long as I'm there”, he all but rushes. 

His certainty clings with every word he says, and you feel the sadness in your chest lighten just barely. “Well, I'm crying now so that’s not true”, you whisper turning to press your check against the door now, turning your body to sit more comfortably. Unknown to you Dominik cracked a smile, running an apprehensive hand through his hair, “Then let me be there with you”. 

You let the meaning of his words sink in, Dominik wanted to be by your side, to comfort, to hold, and to care for you. As if he waited all his life to have you with him, side by side, title or no title. You rise from the floor and twist the doorknob, letting the door creak open to reveal Dominik who has sat up in surprise. He hops up from the floor and wastes no time pulling you in for a hug, his strong arms holding you taut to his muscular body. The pressure was nice, grounding even. You weakly wrap your arms around him, your hands gripping at his flannel and you bury your face into his shirt. Letting a few more stray tears seep from your eyes. 

Dominik says nothing else, just simply letting you cling to his body and allowing you to feel every emotion that presents itself. Tentatively and almost unsure his lips press onto the top of your head, a firm kiss grounding you once and for all calming your tears and jolting breathes.

#dominik mysterio fanfiction #dominik mysterio x you #dominik mysterio x reader #dominik mysterio #dom dom #dominik mysterio fluff #dominik my bbg #wwe #dominik mysterio angst #friday night smackdown

[dross-the-fish]

Colorized Hyde paced around the makeshift lab, wondering how Adam Frankenstein had assembled such a busy workshop without the aid of an assistant.  “Does Dr Watson know you have all this?” he asked, peering at an assortment of organs in flasks.

Adam shook his head, “He does not and I'd be grateful if you didn't reveal my secrets. I like Dr Watson and I know he won’t approve of my work,” he strode over to a large vat filled with liquid in the middle of the room, "If we bring Miss Morris back he may forgive me, if not I'll simply defy him. I accept no masters and though I owe him much he will not command me in this," he pulled a lever and sparks of electricity crackled down the wires connecting to the vat, charging the liquid. He waited a full minute, counting the seconds before he shut off the power.

Hyde nodded, he saw no reason to do Watson any favors or derail Frankenstein's projects so he found himself agreeable "Mum's the word, old chap, I don't see any reason why he should be in the loop,” He tapped the vat with his cane. "What's in here,"

"A compound of chemicals Victor used to submerge me in while he ran the current through my body. This, "Adam made a sweeping gesture over the vat, "Is the elixir that rejuvenates the dead cells and primes them for the electricity to do its work. it took me forever to figure out how to make it but thanks to Dr Watson granting me access to all of his medical tomes my methods may surpass even that of my maker’s," his even white teeth flashed sharply against the harshness of his black lips in a gruesome, self-satisfied grin. He imagined Victor would have been horrified to see his creation carrying on his work, but Adam had not time for guilt or self-reflection now, a life hung in the balance, waiting to be plucked back from the grave and restored.

He was almost giddy with anticipation. He had not disclosed to Hyde that the consciousness that awakened might not be that of their companion. He himself had no memories of a time before his birth and there was just as much likelihood that she too would return as a blank slate. That was not ideal, he admitted, but he could not think such a thing to be a total loss. To have another like himself would be adequate consolation for the loss of Ms Morris. Whatever was brought back, Adam swore to himself that he would not turn his back on his creation. He would do better by his progeny than his own father. Of that he was certain.

"You've resurrected people before?" Hyde's voice intruded as the small man wandered across the lab peering at the glimmering, viscous, liquids that funneled into the vat with interest.

"Not people, but I've brought back several frogs, two cats and a dog," said Adam, "It works and I think perhaps better for my access to the advancement in medicine since my makers time,” He turned to Hyde, "Now, before we begin, did you get the heart?"

Hyde drew a jar from his coat, a perfectly preserved human heart sealed within. Adam nodded in satisfaction, "Excellent, I'm not going to ask where you got it, frankly I do not care so long as it is in good condition and fresh."

"Oh it's fresh alright, and in excellent condition, I tested the donor's constitution myself before the harvest," Hyde chortled as he handed the jar over.

"Mmm, let's not tell Miss Morris that when we bring her back. I don't know how she'd take to finding out you killed someone to get a new heart for her," Adam pursed his lips, he was not legitimately displeased as fresher parts guaranteed a higher chance of success. He looked down at Hyde curiosity scrawled across his features, "Why are you so keen on helping me with this? I know you don't like Watson but this can't all be spite."

"It isn't," Hyde confirmed, "I am genuinely curious to see if this works. I am a scientist at heart after all. More to the point, I liked Miss Morris, she was the only one in our group who doesn't have a stick up her arse and she was good at cards. Besides if I’m stuck with no one but you, Watson and that sanctimonious little shit Harker then I’m going to make damn sure that you’re all as miserable with my company as I am yours. “

"You are, perhaps, the most hateful creature I have ever met...and I am myself, a vile devil," Adam remarked passively as he laid Selma's body on the table and handed Edward the scalpel, "This is your job. I could possibly do it but, I believe, you are an actual doctor and you have the learning and the experience that I lack. I trust you can transplant the heart?"

Edward frowned, "I can, though the task requires a certain level of detachment and patience. That was always Jekyll’s domain…I’ll do my best.”

Adam readied the apparatus that would bring Selma Morris back to life while Edward prepped himself for surgery. As he was washing his hands a small trickle of fear ran down his spine. Could he really do this? It was one thing to patch a small wound but a major surgery, even on a cadaver, required attentiveness and delicacy, those traits did not come easily to him without Henry’s temperance. His head swam, what if he made a mistake? What if he botched it up and they really lost her forever? He felt suddenly nauseous as he picked up the scalpel and prepared to make the first incision.  As the blade hovered over the corpse’s chest he froze, paralyzed by an overwhelming uncertainty. His anxiety built to a point that he found himself fighting the urge to slash into the body and start hacking away. Smash the lab, destroy it all and rip everything apart then burn it to the ground as long as he didn’t have to face the risk of failure.

Did he really want that? He didn’t know…that was the rub of it. Indecision held him pinned and he could feel his control begin to slip.

"Give me the scalpel, Edward," a calm voice in the back of his mind said firmly just as he was about to plunge the instrument into the dead woman’s chest, "you're too shaken up. Let me take over,"

"I'm not letting you out Henry, you tried to kill us and I haven't forgiven you! I know as soon as you're free you'll try to lock me away again!"

"No Edward, I won't. I'll transplant the heart and then I'll let you have control again. I give you my word."

"You mean that now but I know once you're out you'll be tempted! You’ll feel all of those things again that I keep at bay! Shame and sorrow will eat us if I let us be you again! We’ll want to die and we can't resist temptation no matter which of us we are!"

"Isn't Miss Morris worth the risk? I liked her too Edward. If she can be brought back then shouldn’t we try? Listen to me Edward, we don’t want to fail. We want to give this its best chance, let me have the scalpel."

Hyde resisted only briefly before he shuddered, closed his eyes and retreated. Jekyll took a moment to get his bearings, nod at Adam, who was staring at him in confusion, and then swiftly, cleanly, he made the first incision. .....

My players accidentally got an NPC killed and begged me to bring her back. This scene was the result.

#crossover Au #Frankesntein #Jekyll and Hyde #Adam Frankenstein #Edward Hyde #Henry Jekyll

[aquaburst3]

Okay, since I haven't seen many posts up yet about this, not that I blame anyone since others are probably at school and work rn, I want make a post summarizing what happened so far in the latest event on the JP server.

Disclaimers:

All of this info came from LuluBelle over on my Discord server, so all the credit for gathering this up goes to them.

Also, I don't know how to speak or read Japanese nor do I have the JP version of the app, making me unable to verify this. Take this all with a huge mountain of salt.

Like I said in my other post, I'm calling him Honest Fellow, since that sounds less awkward and I think it'll be localized to that anyway.

JP Event Spoilers Below

The arc starts with Honest Fellow and Giddel selling the themepark to some faceless NPCs. After some convincing, they enter the park. Honest Fellow evil laughs.

We cut to a basketball game between RSA and NRC. NRC lose yet again. NRC fight amongst themselves, and the teachers break it up.

After the game, Floyd, Ace, Yuu and Grim, wallowing in their frustration at NRC's loss to RSA, decided to go Craneport to get some snacks. There they find Jade and Jack on the way.Jack was there to get some new threads while Jade was there by sheer coincidence.

Kalim and Ortho arrive. They were in a bookstore, because Kalim was searching for books concerning magic potions, since he's struggling with those and Sam's shop was closed. (I have no idea why Jamil wasn't there either, because him leaving Kalim unattended seems kinda ooc.)

Honest Fellow along with his brother swoop in, making their sales pitch. Grim wonders about what Playful Land is exactly. Ace explains that it's a mysterious amusement park that nobody knows where it is. Honest Fellow says that's correct.

Honest Fellow gives the group tickets to the park. When Kalim says they'll go the next weekend, Honest Fellow chimes in, saying, "Oh, no, no! You can only use it until tomorrow!" They both fuck off into the night.

When the group gets back, they tell Riddle and Jamil about the tickets. They're both like, "Hell no!" Riddle shoots it down because skipping classes is unforgivable. (Ace was originally gonna invite Deuce, but he tattled on him to Riddle, since he found the whole thing suspicious. Honestly, good on him.) Jamil finds it suspicious and puts his foot down, telling Kalim that he forbids him from ever going.

Jack tells Leona, who is all like, "Nah, this is kinda fishy." Jack decides that he has to go because he promised Honest Fellow he would, and he doesn't want to break it.

Floyd tells Azul. He says, "Nope, I'm not coming. It's sus, and I don't wanna owe anybody anything!" They tweels laugh, saying that they want to check it out BECAUSE it's shady.

Ortho tells his brother. He shoots it down, since he doesn't like crowds. Ortho then confides in Vil thanks to them being in the same club.

Early the morning, before the sun rises, the group gathers to sneak to the harbour in town. Kalim managed to get the rest of the Light Music Club to come along, because they saw just how sad Kalim seemed and decided to tag along to comfort him. Vil was convinced to come along by Ortho. One, he wants to see what's the big deal about this park. Two, he's also suspicious, and, as a dorm leader, he wants to oversee all of his juniors and make sure they're all okay. Trey followed after Ace because Deuce asked him for his help and had the feeling that Ace would be stubborn enough to rebel and sneak out even though Riddle said no. Leona followed after Jack because he felt like he had to be the responsible one for once and was genuinely concerned about Jack's well being.

Honest Fellow arrives. He is just so dramatic. Half of them go, "Fucking really? Why did any of our juniors trust this guy? He's as sus as a FNAF animatronic!" (Not in those words, obliviously, but along that same idea.)

Honest Fellow shows them around the park. Which looks like this...

The park is more like those travelling summer fairs where it goes from town to town instead of staying in one place like Universal Studios, Knotts Berry Farm or any of the Disney Parks. The boys can kick back and indulge in their darkest desires.

The third years still feel that this whole thing is kinda sus. Since Grim and some of the others head straight to the entry gate, they reluctantly go along with it to watch over their juniors. Grim face plants into the gate, because he didn't show a ticket. Ace shows his ticket. Ace, Grim and Yuu's clothes get magically altered to resemble the ones on the card. The same thing happened to everyone else.

After everyone's gotten inside the amusement park, we have a foreboding speech from Honest Fellow and Giddel about how the young generation are easily skeptical, but can still be fooled by the promises of a fun play park. Honest Fellow mentions how he and Giddel should accommodate their visitors… for it will be the "last'' fun memory that they'd have. Cue End of Part 1.

Some other minor side things...

It's confirmed. Honest Fellow and Giddel are brothers.

Honest Fellow is a mage, but is less magically inclined compared to the NRC boys. Giddel is a non-mage.

Lulu, aka the same person from my Discord server, suspects the themepark itself might be a magic tool of some kind. Considering how it operated in the movie and novel along with fan theories about them, I'm inclined to believe them.

We also finally got a description of what Yuu is actually wearing during this event. (Honestly, it's about fucking time. Because one gripe I always had with these events is that we never get even a small description of what Yuu is wearing, which makes it harder to imagine what's going on in my head.) Basically, they are wearing the same style jacket as Leona, but with the same colours as Lilia's costume. Do with that information as you will Malleus/Yuu shippers.

Honest Fellow has a Honest John pendant on his hat.

More of a personal gripe, but I'm not sure what to make of Honest Fellow as a character yet. Right now, he seems like the mastermind behind this whole operation, but that doesn't make sense. In the movie, Honest John wasn't on board with the Pleasure Island shit, and only went along with it thanks to the Coachman threatening him and Gideon's lives. Wouldn't it be far more fitting for him to be a lacky of another villain and being forced to go along with it out of fear of having the same thing happen to him and his brother? And if that was the case, that would also better align him thematically with Ortho, who's brother is the same way towards him. But I'm reserving my judgements on his character until the event is over.

Playful Land gives me major Joy Joy Land vibes.

I find the idea of Leona, Trey and Vil going there, because they are worried about their juniors adorable. They are really tapping into their big brother instincts, even if I doubt Vil and Leona would ever admit it out loud.

Though, one plot hole with this whole thing is why didn't Jamil, Trey and Deuce rip up the tickets if they were that concerned about the others going to the park? Granted, the tickets could be enchanted so that they're impossible to destroy, but I never heard if that's the case yet. Idk, it's a nitpick, but it's still something that annoys me a bit as a writer myself.

#twisted wonderland #twst spoilers #aqua rambles #fellow honest