#i found some but it’s missing a lot of books like pine stars choice

[iliveiloveiwrite]

Pain in My Heart // Benedict Bridgerton

Request: Could I please request a Bridgerton imagine where Eloise or Daphne are trying to matchmake Reader with one of their brothers (you can pick which one) but Reader actually hits it off with another brother who's in love at first sight (again, your choice!!). - @libraryoffandomsuniverse

A/N: I am so sorry for how long this has taken!! I hope I have done your request justice. I had a lot of fun writing this, I’m pretty proud of what I’ve come up so I hope you like!! Thank you for requesting! Title: Pain in My Heart - Otis Redding

Pairing: Anthony Bridgerton x Fem!Reader (Platonic), Benedict Bridgerton x Fem!Reader (Romantic)

Warnings: pining, mutual pining, awful flirting (I can't write it for the life in me), unrequited love (?), a pride and prejudice moment, love confessions, fluff, very very light angst.

Word count: 4.7k

There wasn’t a lot that Daphne and Eloise Bridgerton had in common. It was thought by their mother that due to their closeness in age, they would get along swimmingly. However, by the time that Eloise could speak for herself, it became increasingly clear that there were to be no two people different than that of Eloise and Daphne.

However, whilst the two did not share the same tastes in music or literature, they were united in the hope that they would see their elder brothers happily in love.

It is on a Wednesday in the middle of February when Daphne decides that it is time for her eldest brother, Anthony, to find a wife.

Her decision is made when Anthony stalks into the family drawing room. The only sign of his anger being the blazing of his eyes. Dramatically, he throws himself onto the closest couch, his legs stretching across the pale blue fabric as he laments the meddling of mothers.

Daphne barely represses the urge to roll her eyes. She could tell that Eloise was having a hard time not telling her brother how easy he had it in comparison to rights of women and marriage.

Thankfully, however, Anthony is saved from such a lecture by the announcement of a beloved friend. (Y/N) (Y/L/N) had known the Bridgerton family for as long as she had been alive. The same age as Daphne, the two had fallen into an easy friendship that grew more cherished the more time passed.

Upon her announcement, Anthony sits up with keen interest. An action not missed by both Daphne and Eloise – they share a look, one only understood by sisters with masses of brothers.

“Dear (Y/N),” Daphne greets, standing from her chair to greet her lifelong friend, “How have you been?”

“I’ve been very well though it has only been a couple of days since you saw me last.”

Daphne laughs; a light and airy sound. “I can still miss you in that time. Come, sit by me and we can catch up.”

The two women are soon joined by Eloise who places her book down on the table, spine up so she does not lose her page. From where they sit, neither Anthony nor Benedict can hear what the women seem to be whispering about though it seems to be of a serious issue with grave looks on their faces.

Benedict decides that he doesn’t like the look of frustration on her face; the furrow of her brows. If it wouldn’t raise questions of his sanity, he would press his thumb to the furrow, smoothing out her brow so not a trace of the worry remained.

“(Y/N),” Anthony calls, interrupting the conversation currently taking place between the three women, “Would you be attending Lord and Lady Hopton’s ball later on this week? Lord Hopton has done nothing but discuss the expense being put into the event.”

(Y/N) swallows her small sip of tea, placing the cup and saucer down on the table before answering the eldest Bridgerton. “I do plan on attending,” She smiles, fiddling with her gloved fingers.

A pleased smile breaks out across Anthony’s face as he nods. Turning away from her, Anthony walks back to the pale blue couch that only mere moments ago he had thrown himself across in vexation at his dear mother. Now, he sits down gently, making sure every ounce of his nobility is on show.

Benedict cannot help but roll his eyes at the antics of his elder brother. As if on a covert mission for the crown, Benedict’s gaze slides back to her – runs over her figure, taking in the way her dress sits on her form and the way her smile lights up her whole face. He’s a fool in love, he realises, but he would rather be a fool in love with her than a fool in love with anyone else.

It’s as if he finally understands what the poets write about; how the artists never paint more than their muse. As Benedict peers down at the sketchbook in his hands, he comes to realise that he has been drawing her for months. He has found his muse and it’s close to breaking him when he sees the plotting glance shared between Daphne and Eloise.

(Y/N) sits at the table, utterly unaware of the plan being concocted between his sisters. He has the urge to scream, to yell but he keeps quiet. Benedict becomes the very definition of decorum; smiling politely at her when their eyes meet from across the room. The very moment sends his heart skipping a beat before picking up a rhythm he isn’t certain is compatible with life. He has to stop himself from reaching up to grab his chest to ensure his heart doesn’t beat right out of it.

All too soon the moment is over, and she returns to laughing with his younger sisters, but even she knows that something has changed between them. (Y/N) wasn’t one to believe in love at first sight; the very notion belonging only to fairytales, but she, herself, could not deny the thrill that overtook her body when she met the blue eyes of Benedict Bridgerton.

-----------

Lord and Lady Hopton owned one of the last remaining Tudor residences in London. Many had fallen during the reformation, but in some strange stroke of luck, the Hopton’s home had remained largely undamaged. From there, it passed down the male line as all properties and titles were wont to do in such a society.

The current Lord and Lady prided themselves on the tracking of their lineage, dedicating themselves to the conservation of their home. It was rare for them to throw a ball such as this one, but with the favourable weather, Lady Hopton was able to convince her husband it would be well enough for the courtyard to be used to entertain their nearest and dearest.

There was no set theme; an idea many were grateful for. As much as (Y/N) loved the dress up, the competitive nature between eligible ladies wasn’t something she was in the mood for.

The atmosphere is much more relaxed as (Y/N) takes a turn about the room, smiling politely at the women she has grown up with in London society. They would be civil towards each other, but there was no real friendships forged. (Y/N) was quite content with the Bridgerton brood.

Though they had arrived together, (Y/N) found herself wandering from the comforting presence of the family. She could feel Anthony’s eyes on her, and she thinks of Daphne’s suggestion from the other day; the eldest Bridgerton girl had all but suggested that (Y/N) marry Anthony.

Whilst the suggestion was flattering, (Y/N) hadn’t stopped thinking of the moment she shared with Benedict. She thinks of the moment often; remembers the way his stare felt, as if he was staring into her very soul and he liked what he found. She thinks of the way her body responded; the shiver sent through her and how she realised that she liked the way he looked at her. As if she hung the moon and stars in the sky for him, and him alone.

(Y/N) loses herself in the crowd. She wanders and wanders, watching new love form and old love strengthen as she catches sight of couples beginning their night. (Y/N) continues her ruminating until she bumps into something hard. Another body.

(Y/N) cringes when she finds herself face to face with the chest of Benedict Bridgerton. “Benedict!” She gasps, “I’m sorry.”

He steadies her with a gentle hand to her elbow. “You have nothing to apologise for. You looked to be deep in thought, I’m only sorry for interrupting you.”

(Y/N) feels her skin begin to flush. I was thinking of you, she wants to cry at the man, but she only just manages to refrain herself.

Benedict laughs before he can stop himself. “If you’re reacting like that, I have to know what you were thinking of.”

“Nothing for nosies,” She responds, a coy smile crossing her painted lips.

Benedict gasps, pressing a hand to his chest in mock hurt. “You wound me, (Y/N).”

“I’m sure you’ll recover,” (Y/N) laughs, patting Benedict’s arm in mock pity.

“I don’t know,” Benedict expresses, his eyes running over her face and outfit. “I think I’m going to need someone to nurse me back to health.”

(Y/N) feels her skin once again begin to heat at the insinuation in his words. She had encountered banter before with the Bridgerton brothers, but she had never encountered such overt flirting. Benedict’s eyes glittered with mirth; his smile crinkling the corners of his eyes – this was him. This was Benedict in his element; he was an artist, a gentleman, and a man that could render her speechless with a simple line of speech.

She finds it hard to respond for a moment; finds it hard to string two thoughts together in his intoxicating presence. She flounders for a second, watching Benedict continue to smile widely as if he had nothing better to do than waste time with her.

Eventually, she collects herself enough. She peers up at the man from under her lashes, fluttering them to the best of her ability as she whispers, “Such requests may make the recovery period a lot longer and a lot harder.”

Leaving the man speechless, (Y/N) pats his arm once more before taking her leave. Feeling hot and bothered by her encounter with Benedict, (Y/N) ambles over to drinks table. Daphne and Eloise stand there nursing their own drinks; they smile widely at their friend as she approaches the table.

“Have you given thought to what I suggested the other day?” Daphne asks; watching her best friend over the rim of her lemonade glass.

“Courting Anthony?” (Y/N) clarifies, reaching for her glass of the tepid drink. She frowns absentmindedly; it was one of the main issues with balls, they never could keep the drinks cold enough to be refreshing throughout the night. They almost always turned sour.

“The very suggestion,” (Y/N)’s dearest friend states with a smile.

“It wouldn’t work,” (Y/N) protests, urging her friends to see the truth. “We aren’t suited for each other.”

“Anthony disagrees,” Daphne chimes, looking and feeling all to superior in the conversation. “He confided to me only yesterday that he wants to court you.”

The ground is close to swallowing her whole; the walls becoming far too close for her liking. Her mouth is dry when she tries to swallow around the lump in her throat. “That wouldn’t be fair to him,” She croaks, feeling all too close to tears.

“Why not?” Daphne demands, making her vexation known by placing her hands on her hips.

“Daphne,” Eloise interrupts, glancing warily between the two women. “(Y/N) isn’t in love with Anthony. She’s in love with someone else.”

The fight leaves her beloved friend in an instant; she brings a hand to her mouth to cover the shock of Eloise’s words. “I didn’t know,” She whispers, “I wouldn’t have pushed so hard.”

“I know you wouldn’t have,” (Y/N) appeases, “I’m rather new to this.”

“Do we know who it is?” Daphne asks, unable to keep the excitement off her face as she thinks of the handful of men worthy enough to love her dear friend.

(Y/N) sighs, deciding whether to come clean and tell her longest friend that she has found herself hopelessly in love with her brother. She hadn’t even expected it. “It’s Benedict,” She eventually confesses, feeling pressured by the investigative gaze of Daphne Bridgerton.

“Benedict?” Daphne asks, confused, “As in my other brother?”

“The very same,” (Y/N) comments lightly… too lightly as if ready to be on the defence for her feelings for Benedict.

Daphne blinks once, twice before her face breaks with the most beautiful smile. “Oh (Y/N)!” She cries, “This is wonderful!”

“He might not love me back,” (Y/N) whispers, doing her best to keep a light spin on the situation but the idea that Benedict may not return her feelings hurts far more than it should.

“And Anthony still wants to court you,” Eloise reminds her, her voice close to pity.

“Speaking of the devil,” Daphne murmurs with a smile on her face, “Anthony is heading this way.”

“He is?” (Y/N) asks, pivoting on the spot to the find the eldest Bridgerton making his way through the crowd. He smiles at his sisters, briefly checking their glasses to ensure they were sticking strictly to the lemonade offered. When he is suited with what he finds, he turns to (Y/N) and holds out his hand. “Would you care to dance?” He asks her with a confident smile.

She nods her consent, taking his offered hand and allowing herself to be led to the floor. Anthony leads her expertly across the floor; lessons as a child and years in the London society forging him to be an impressive dancer. He makes her laugh as they continue dance, and whilst (Y/N) has a good time with the eldest Bridgerton, she cannot see herself falling for the man like she can see her entire future with Benedict.

------------

The ball had wound down naturally; families and lovers beginning to make their way home through the early morning London streets. (Y/N) travels with the Bridgertons, having arrived with them in the first place. Daphne focuses on the streets of London, doing her best not to fall asleep before getting home to her bed.

“How are you getting home?” Daphne asks, not removing her gaze from the darkened streets of the capital city.

“I’m not sure, I don’t want to have to wait for another carriage,” (Y/N) complains, holding a hand to her mouth to cover a yawn that had slipped out. The tiredness was clinging to her bones now; she wanted nothing more to crawl into her own bed, sink into the pillows and fall into a dreamworld where Benedict climbs into the other side of the bed.

“Stay with us,” Eloise invites, meeting Anthony’s eyes.

“I wouldn’t be an imposition?” (Y/N) asks smally; the last thing she wanted was to be burden on her friends.

“You never could be,” Anthony smiles, “You’re always welcome to stay the night.”

“Thank you, Anthony,” She whispers, reaching for his hand in the dark and squeezing.

Silence falls for the rest of the ride; the weariness of each of them punctuating the air, creating a warmer atmosphere that leaves (Y/N) blinking away sleep. Eloise does her best to remain awake, but her head soon winds up on Anthony’s shoulder to which the man looks the surprised. He recovers quickly, adjusting his younger sister to make her more comfortable.

The Bridgerton siblings and (Y/N) all sigh in blessed relief when the carriage rolls to a stop outside Bridgerton House. The door opening lets in a cold blast of air, making her shiver as she reaches for the handle to help herself down.

“Here,” Benedict’s voice sounds in the dark light of night, “Let me help you.”

His hand reaches for hers; it clasps hers gently as he helps her down from the carriage. All too soon, his hand falls from hers and (Y/N) is left feeling bereft from the absence of his touch. “Thank you,” She whispers, taking a risk and glancing up at the blue eyes already fixed steadily on her.

“You’re welcome,” He murmurs. Benedict glances back to the carriage to find the rest of his family descending on them. “Goodnight,” He whispers, ducking his head in a bow and leaving her on the steps of Bridgerton House.

(Y/N) watches the man depart in somewhat of a daze. If she focused hard enough, she could still feel his hand in hers. She could feel every fingerprint, every crease, every line in his palm. She could feel it all; she wanted to feel more. She wanted everything with that man; would happily offer up her everything for a single glimpse at what it could be like to wake up in his arms and be happy.

Sighing heavily, she touches a hand to her forehead, pausing in the grand entryway of the Bridgerton family home. She felt so keenly for the man that she knew she would suffer the worst fate to man should he not return her feelings: heartbreak.

“(Y/N)?” Anthony calls from the door, his arm around Eloise’s waist. “Would you meet me in my study? I need to talk to you.”

“Of course,” She allows, smiling at the sight before her. Anthony whispers something to his sister to which Eloise offers her goodnights and begins to climb the stairs to her room, Anthony following behind her with a worried look on his face that only a beloved brother could master.

Anthony’s study smelled of wood polish; the mahogany desk sitting by the windows being the main feature of the room. It’s dark wood providing the much of the fragrance in the room; it’s a comforting scent. (Y/N) smiles when she realises that it’s comforting as it reminds her of the Viscount; the scent of his spicy cologne intermingled with the wood, becoming one and the same.

“Thank you for waiting,” Anthony whispers, closing the door behind him, “I know how tired you are, but I really wanted to speak to you.”

“Whatever’s the matter?”

Suddenly, Anthony no longer holds the prowess of a Viscount but rather, looks like the eighteen year old boy handed a peerage all too soon. He runs a hand through his hair out of nerves, pacing back and forth behind his desk. Eventually, he comes to a slow stop, resting his hands on the back of his father’s ageing chair. “Have you given any thought to your future?”

“It’s been on my mind more and more these days,” She answers honestly. It’s all she has thought of since her eyes met Benedict’s across the room and she got a glimpse into what her mornings, afternoons, evenings with the man could be like.

“I think we could be good together,” Anthony argues, offering up a slice of his heart for the taking, “I think we work well together.”

“Anthony, may I be honest with you for a moment?”

“I’d hope for nothing more.”

She takes a deep breath; steeling her nerves before smiling at the Viscount. “With all due respect, I don’t think you do love me.”

Anthony moves to interrupt her; a flash of anger and upset in his eyes. He quietens when she holds up a single hand; begging him to let her continue. “Anthony, I think you were looking for someone to stop your mother from pestering you about marriage. I just happened to walk into the room at the right moment.”

Anthony frowns; he takes in (Y/N)’s words, letting them roll around his mind as he thinks back to the first day when he realised he could truly love the woman sitting in front of him. Violet Bridgerton had been on him from the moment he walked through the front door; producing yet another list of eligible women in London that he could find a potential match in. He had taken the list from his beloved mother and in the privacy of his study, he had ripped the list to tiny pieces making sure that none of the names were legible.

On some level, he has always loved her. (Y/N) had been in his life from the very day she was born; mother being friends, Violet able to offer (Y/N)’s advice as she was her firstborn. At this point, Violet was a seasoned expert on motherhood. Anthony had always known of the girl that was best friends with Daphne; he had watched her grow up. On some level, he has always had some feeling for her.

He knows know, though, that those feelings could never broach romance. There was too deep an affection between them.

“You’re right,” Anthony states, “It wouldn’t be a love match.”

“It wouldn’t,” She affirms, taking a seat in front of the large, wooden desk. Silhouettes of his parents and siblings decorate the space; it brings a fond smile to her face. Anthony presented a strong front, but in private, he was as much the adoring son and brother.

“But you think you have found your love match,” Anthony declares, wanting to clear the air.

“I’m not sure,” She laughs mirthlessly. “I have no clue as to whether he feels the same.”

“He’d be an idiot, not to,” Anthony compliments, “Do I know the lucky man?”

(Y/N) looks sheepish as she stares at the Viscount. She had already confessed to Daphne and Eloise – what harm could one more person do?

“It’s Benedict.”

“You love him,” Anthony whispers; not an accusation, not an ounce of anger in his voice. A simple fact stated for the room.

(Y/N) nods. “I do. I love him with all that I am and all that I know I could be.”

A sad, bittersweet smile crosses Anthony’s face; he won’t speak of how the words hurt him. He reaches for her hand and clasps it tightly between both of his.

“Go to him,” He whispers, “You have my blessing.”

(Y/N) stands. Her intention is to leave the room and find the Bridgerton who had so readily taken root within her heart, but first she crosses to where Anthony stands behind his desk. He watches her with curious eyes as the silk of her glove brushes his cheek; his eye flutter closed when he feels the featherlight press of her lips and the whisper of her gratitude.

Anthony keeps his eyes closed when she pulls away from him; he keeps them closed until he hears the tell-tale click of the door. It is only then that Anthony allows himself to open his eyes and peer into the heartbreak now cracking open his chest. Not for the love he though he felt, but for the utter want racing through his body. He wants a love like that; he was going to find a love like that.

They would be happy together; he thinks to himself as he breathes in the floral scent of her perfume. They would be happy together, perfectly suited to the point that Anthony craves such intimacy. One day; he promises, one day he would hold such a treasure within his hands.

-------------

Bridgerton House remained warm and inviting even after the family had long retired for bed. The sconces lining the walls still lit; their warm light easy on anyone’s eyes should they need to traverse the hallways for whatever reason.

The path to Benedict’s room isn’t one she has taken often. Thinking on it, (Y/N) realises that save for being shown the door on her first ever visit to the London home, she has not stepped foot close to the room since. Until tonight, that is.

Her skirts swish delicately underfoot as (Y/N) makes her way to his room. She doesn’t dare utter a single breath for the fear of being caught; all around her slumber her closest friends. If she were caught by a member of staff, her reputation balanced on being ruined.

Her hand trembles as she clenches it into a fist, raises it to the plain white door and knocks twice. She waits on the threshold, twisting her fingers into her skirts – a nervous habit she’s had since she was a child. She was thankful that she no longer bit her nails down to the bed.  

“Come in,” calls his quiet voice and her nerves only heighten. Taking a deep breath, she pushes open the door that could reveal her future.

“(Y/N),” Benedict gasps, the deep v of his shirt falling open, revealing far more of his bare chest than (Y/N) had expected to see tonight.

“I wanted to talk to you,” She whispers, hovering between the doorway and his room. She does her best to not stare at the defined muscles on display but loses the battle. Her eyes run over the parts of his muscular torso and the strong forearms shown with the sleeves of white shirt rolled up. She didn’t think it was possible to be attracted to the forearms of a person, but here was Benedict proving her wrong.

“What if you get caught?” He whisper-asks, worry lacing his tone as he glances at something behind her. She turns on instinct only to find an empty hallway and three lit sconces.

“Anthony knows where I am,” She retorts, stepping further into Benedict’s room.

“Anthony?”

“He gave me his blessing.”

“To enter my room… unattended… late at night?”

“Essentially, yes,” She smiles, thinking back to her conversation with the Viscount.

“Why were you talking to Anthony?” Benedict asks before he can stop himself. He doesn’t like the simmering jealousy he feels that the picture of (Y/N) alone with Anthony in his study. He clears his throat to chase away the hollow ache of envy; he doesn’t want to picture the conversation. He doesn’t think he could handle it.

“He asked me to court him.”

“Oh,” Benedict responds, feeling his heart begin to crack in his chest. “What did you say?”

“I told him I couldn’t. We wouldn’t suit each other and one other thing.”

“What other thing?”

“I don’t love him. I love someone else.”

“You do? Do I know them?”

(Y/N) laughs, stretching her arms out as she gestures to Benedict’s bedroom. “I’m stood in your room in the middle of the night, Benedict, with full knowledge that if I were to be caught by any of the staff, I would be ruined. What does that tell you?”

Benedict frowns, refusing to let himself fall into the hope growing in his chest. He feels like Icarus; too close to the sun, too close to thing he wants most in this world.

“Stop this pain in my heart,” She commands weakly. “Stop this pain and tell me if you feel the same. If you don’t, I understand but I’d ask you not to tell anyone of this midnight visit.”

His mouth runs dry, and he finds it hard to answer. He’s falling, falling, falling for the woman stood across from him and he cannot find the words to accurately describe the depth of his feelings for her. That day in the drawing room – he’s known her for years, always been aware of her, but that day, it was as if he was finally seeing her for the pure beauty that she inhabits. She could rival Aphrodite herself.

Upset shutters across (Y/N)’s face as she nods twice, trying her best to keep the burn of tears at bay. “It’s okay, Benedict,” She whispers, turning for the door, “Thank you for listening.”

At the last moment, Benedict reaches out and snatches her wrist. “Don’t go,” He pleads, “Don’t leave me. I don’t think I could live with myself if you left me.”

“I don’t understand,” She whispers; confusion lacing her voice. Her eyebrows furrow as she stares at the man before her, “You didn’t say anything. You stayed silent; I took that as my cue to leave.”

Benedict shakes his head. “Don’t go,” He whispers, bringing a hand up to card through the loose strands of hair framing her face. He almost preens as she leans into his touch. “I feel the same, I love you just the same,” Benedict confesses; feeling the weight leave his chest.

“You do?” She asks; her voice small but hopeful.

“I do,” Benedict smiles, brushing her cheek with his finger, “I think I always have, but I didn’t realise until recently.”

(Y/N) sniffles as tears threaten to make an appearance. She laughs wetly, unable to stop the giggle from leaving her mouth as Benedict wipes away the tears. “I hope those are happy tears,” He murmurs wryly.

“They are,” She answers, throwing her arms around his neck and pulling him down to her level. “They definitely are.”

“Good,” He answers.

Their faces are so close now it would only take a fraction of a movement to press their lips together; to seal the promise of their union. “Kiss me, Benedict,” She whispers; need lacing her voice as she stares into his famously blue eyes.

Benedict doesn’t need to be told twice; it isn’t often he gets to kiss a goddess.

********

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#benedict bridgerton x reader #benedict x reader #benedict bridgerton #bridgerton #bridgerton fanfic #benedict bridgerton fanfiction #benedict bridgerton imagines #bridgerton fanfiction

[popculturebuffet]

Scotrospective: Scott Pilgrim Vs the World (The Comic)

Hello, Hello, Hello scottaholics! And what a beautiful day it is: After decades lost in the lost woods, at least it had that catchy tune to keep it company, Scott Pilgrim Vs the World: The Game is FINALLY back and performing for you on all platforms!

Even Stadia, the platform most likely to disappear like this game did for a while! Cheap shots at the stadia aside as a huge fan of the franchise as a whole and of this game who played it back on the 360, and had since sold said 360 so I had no way to get it back or ever play the dlc packs. Seriously who didn’t want to play wallace but never got to? Everyone, everyone is the answer. But with those the entirety of what I consider to be the main cast is playable, it has online so you can beat up hipsters, guys in costumes and robots with your friends, it’s a good damn feeling.  And since i’m in a celebratory mood, naturally i’m also feeling like a review. And since it just so happens the next volume up in my look at the comics is Vs the World, seriously I planned this review for this month without thinking to have it come out on the same day as the game until a week or two in, I felt there was no better way to celebrate the biggest day for Scott Pilgrim fans in some time.. and for Brian Lee O Malley as he’ll stop getting twitter asks about it. So with all the exposition taken care of LAST TIME, and the link right there if your curious, we can jump right in. On with the show!

After our opening titles, and yes this comic has opening titles, with Ramona sitting solmely in the rain. 

And Scott caught in the title. The rain shot is real pretty by the way. But yeah once we get past those we’re taken back 7 years ago. Finn found out his father was an asshole, and voiced by Stephen Root so hey you take the good with the bad, Steven just learned the horrifying truth about Gem Monsters, Guardians of the Galaxy saved the MCU and I was trying to find work after college.. wait... sorry sorry that was 7 years ago from THIS year. The comic came out in 2005, though the comic takes place on a sliding timescale where only like 2 years pass so I dunno when this is. Let’s just say 98.  Okay so 1998: Bill Cllinton’s sex scandal breaks, and puts way too much of hte blame on the young intern whose life came to be defined by one stupid mistake she made with a man who was way older and should’ve known better, the tide of the Monday Night War turned in favor of the WWF as Stone Cold Steve Austin became a household name, and it was an utterly standup year for video game relaases with Ocarina of Time, Banjo-Kazooie, Crash Bandicoot: Warped, StarCraft, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night, WWF: War Zone, Pokemon Stadium, Spyro The Dragon, Pokemon Yellow, WarioLand 2, Oddworld: Abe’s Exodus, Star Wars: Rogue Squadron, Pokemon: Trading Card Game and Sonic Adventure. It’s like someone took a good chunk of my childhood and squeezed it into one year holy shit, I did not expect this when looking up what came out in 98. 

And while the movie pool wasn't’ quite this amazing, we still had The Wedding Singer, The Big Lebowski, the dude abides, Batman and Mr Freeze: SubZero, The Truman Show, Mulan, the good one not the one made near concetration camps that makes her into a demigod, Saving Private Ryan, Blade, Simon Birch, Scooby Doo on Zombie Island, Rushmore, Bride of Chucky, HalloweenTown, Plesantville, and the Prince of Egypt. And in music Weird Al changed from his first signature look to his second, getting Lasik and growing out his hair. Seirously had no idea that was this year. Good to know. Also Elton John got his knighthood. Super shooters. I could go on with 1998 triva for days but I cannot go on for 8 weeks so let’s get to the point here.. during alllla this  Scott Pilgrim, age 16, was starting St. John’s Catholic School and a couple of guys who were up to no good started making trouble. . by threatning to beat him up for no real reason. A fight insues and we cut to the principal’s office as Scott’s still a minor and not allowed to get into death fights just yet under the people’s freedom of choices and voices act. 

It’s here he meets Lisa Miler, a peppy and sarcastic blonde, who’s intrigued by the fact Scott somehow got beat up after being here just 15 minutes and wants to be friends. Naturally for scott next we see him he’s busy playing video games, and annoyed someone else is around and wondering who this person whose now in his basement is. God no wonder teenage me related to him. So for the next few pages we see their friendship in time lapse: Lisa joins him at lunch, then geninely wonders since Scott’s Untentionally a dick if he hates her.. it’s part of why I think Scott has some form of autisim. And not just because I tend to belivie a character is on the spectrum all the damn time, it’s because of the way he acts: while he is nice and charming at times.. he also clearly has trouble relating to people or realizing how his actions effect them and as seen here in a younger form can often be compeltely distanced from normal social queues, not getting how his actions might be seen until Lisa outright talks to him about it. I mean.. it’s not a huge stretch, and it dosen’t mean he’s nto responsible for his own actions, but it does EXPLAIN a lot of them better: why he just sorta forgets about Knives post-ramona but at the same time still cares enough he dosen’t want to hurt her despite you know, that ship sailing just by having moved on. 

But now the two are friends and his parents, who we meet for the first time and sister inquire about her being his girlfirned.. and by next jumpcut his parents apparently don’t want him hanging out with girls? What exactly the fuck? Also they mention Laurence, Scott’s brother whose missing for most of the books and has no real payoff for not being around. Next cut we get KIM!

Thank you Prissy. And she’s.. not all that different, assuming, correctly that their partner project, how she meets scott will just result in her doing all the work.. which not only is how these things usually went when I was in high school a decade later, but reminds me of the time me and my friends curtis and justin were put on a project and when asked who the alied powers were, guessed “Germany?”.... you can understand my fear. And also Curtis punching him for getting nothing done.. and not hard or brutally mind you just once quick in the gut and with full warning. Ah... the adaquate old days. 

So back to Lisa as, since Scott’s Mom has a guitar.. a fact I.. never honestly thought about. Seriously I never realized her children, since the Bass Scott has for most of the books is Laurence’s, getting into music was probably due to her. Also Lisa makes her case for WHY be a band: the school has a regular event called Lunchapalooza, where everyone goes to and since by teen logic, just being in a band is automiacally cool, she figures they can jump from not QUITE being in any cliques to being super cool. Which honestly yeah... while I didn’t know any bands in high school, the fact one of my friends, ironically named Scott, was a DJ automatically made him pretty damn cool once he got past his awkard phase. I never got past mine but somehow was loved by all except that one douchey kid in our group who mocked me for naming my Luxray kim, assuming it was based on Kim possible and not Kim Pine... though frankly how that’s an insult when Kim Possible was a fucking awesome show and character is beyond me but he was just 17 and also a douchebag, it didn’t have to make since it just had to piss off the easily pissed off kid with aspergers. So Scott poses how they can be a band with just their guitars and Lisa concedes drums WOULD help.. I mean it’s what MADE Shallow Gravy. 

So while Kim wonders if Scott is dating Lisa, because teenagers don’t really get girls and boys can be friends without wanting to be together, though not often as teenage boy brains can be rather stupid and horny... can confrim from personal experince. So it becomes clear Scott has a thing for Kim, and when Scott tries broaching it with Lisa she dosen’t take it well and he backpedals to asking her to be her drummer and plans to monday, proving Scott has somehow not gotten better at reading women, or anyone after 7 years. Can relate. 

So yeah he decides to ask Monday, same day as their presentation.. and thankfully missed the bus as he arrives to find the Benvy Tech boys came in, took everyone out and abducted Kim. Because yeah, just in case you were wondering Scott’s life was always like this.. or was it? Questions for later. So one Canadian Version of River City Ransom later, Scott’s made his way to simon... who, since most of you have probably seen the movie or art of the movie.. looks an AWFUL lot like Gideon. Hrmmm. Simon is naturally the final boss here and wonders if this is the best St. Joels can muster. Scott quips back as only Scott can. 

So cue an unsuprisingly awesome actoin sequence. IT’s part of why I love these color editions: While they already LOOKED thoroughly fantastic the added colors really help the series shonen manga meets old school video game vibe REALLY fucking pop. So Simon pleads mercy which like Scott delivering a good quip.. should’ve really been a red flag to younger me and is foreshadowing for later in case I was too subtle. He then does what any noble hero would do.. kicks simon into the sunset, tells Kim how he feels and asks her to play drums. They then make out. Awwww. 

Lisa suprisingly takes it well as the next montage shows.. granted we’ll learn in Feburary she wasn’t QUITE as over scott as it seemed, but the three, along with a friend of Lisa’s whose name I forgot and who DOSEN’T come back so I’m not going to bother learning, form their own friend group, Scott and Kim get an A, and Scott, Kim and Lisa’s band is dubbed sonic and knuckles, which is an objectively awesome band name. Something the series really does great: Video Game Based Band Names. Crash and the Boys, Sex Bomb-Omb, Clash at the Demonhead... we need more bands like this in the real world dammit. So then they play their big game, the two loose their vrigniity.. and then Kim asks scott “your moving to tornoto?” And.. for now.. that’s that. 

While the framing of that will be VERY important in the last volume, as notice how KIM’S the one who brings it up and it’s not explicitly stated scott actually told her, this flasback is great. While it does contribute to the volume’s drifty pacing, more  on that as we go, it brilliantly sets up a LOT of stuff for later, paticuarlly Lisa who I assumed wouldn’t be back and younger me’s jaw fucking DROPPED when she popped up in Volume 4. Granted i’m spoiling that suprise for you now but odds are most of you reading this have either alreaddy read these or were probably wondering if the girl from the animated short ever had any actual relevance in the books. So yes, yes she does. She’s also the pink haired girl you see pop up in the game in the background, as a nod to O’Malley’s comic strip style which had her and Kim as the leads.  Also yeah for fans of the game or movie or even the comics who were unaware.. this prologue got an animated adaption on adult swim to promote the movie. Naturally Micheal Cera and Allison Pill reprised their roles as Scott and Kim, with Mae Whitman voicing lisa.. and honestly being perfect for the roll, and Jason Schrwartzman voicing Simon naturally. While the animation is slightly limited, it still looks decent and expertly translates O’Malley’s art, while sliming things down slightly where needed to fit a short, and the anmation takes a huge bump for the fight scene which like the comic is short but awesome. While it has no real bearing on the film as Kim’s former relationship with Scott never really comes up or has any impact, as the Film while good was based primarily on volumes 1-3 with small pieces of 4 (paticuarlly the iconic “Lesbians gag”), with Wright working off outlines and drafts of 5 and 6, so the last half hour or so is mostly Wright’s invention. 

Not a bad thing as it’s still awesome and not o’malley’s fault but it means kim dosen’t get to do much, and is a big reason why I want an adaptation on netflix or hbo max. While i’d still want changes both because there’s no sense doing an adaptation if your not going to make some tweaks of your own and because it’d be intresting to update the series to modern day, both in societal conventions and so everyone stops saying the r word. Seirously the most telling sign of the series age is that word showing up quite a bit during the first half of the series. Point is there is merit in doing another remix of the story and doing a longer form one so we can get more of the characters, as well as flesh out ones like Steven, Neil (Who was done WAY better in the movie adaptation thanks to the wonderful Johnny Simmons), and Stacey who got the shaft in the books. Again, not slagging off the movie, it’s really great. Just saying there’s always room for more Scott Pilgrim content and we all know it. 

We’ll get back to the comic proper, and the present day of 2005, after the cut. 

So the story proper opens with Scott dreaming of playing video games... because of course he is with Ramona walking in. and finding it charmingly pathetic but wanting her boyfriend to you know, get out of bed. It’s 11:30.  So with Scott’s ass out of bed, we find Scott, Age 23 idiot with a heart of gold and Wallace, 25 king of all gays, on the bus as they talk it getting warmer and Lucas Lee, movie star and jason lee stand in coming to town to film a movie.. and Scott being Scott gets him confused for Luke WIlson. He’s also seen Bottle Rocket which.. good on him. Seriously while not wes anderson’s best film, those were made long afte this comic was published, it’s still a damn good one.. where was his career at this point... looking it up life aquatic was his most recent films and is still one of my favorites. So yeah he was in a good place career wise. 

Scott proudly talks about having Ramona over in a couple days so she can see his place and meet Wallace. But as explained by Wallace for those of us just tuning in, he already met her last volume. You know during that time Stacey thought she could magically make her date not be attracted to someone else.. and yes even almost a month later not letting that one go. Stacey should know better. Not saying i’ts right Wallace keeps poaching her boyfriends, but she still shoudlnt’ try and force a relationship with a guy or even finish a date with one who makes out with someone else, regardless of gender, mid date. She deserves better. In general not just in this one scenario but we’ll get to that. 

Point is while Scott, as usual, is a bit pissy about this Wallace.. has no time for that and issues an ultimatium

And he’s not bluffing, as he fully intends to tell Ramona the minute she walks in the door if he dosen’t break up with Knives. It really shows Wallace off at his best and why he’s Scott’s closest friend: Kim and Stephen do care about him but Kim both has a LOT of unresolved issues and sexual tension with him and keeps eveyrbody including Scott at arm’s length. And Stephen.. while he will OCASIONALLY call Scott out mostly just enables him, either ignoring his college buddy’s shittier behavior or playing along with it and backing him up when Kim rightfully calls him on being a dickhead. While both love their friend they just aren’t the best at dealing with his shit or getting why he does the things he does good and bad.  Wallace on the other hand geninely likes Scott. He’ll lock him out of the house and tell him to sleep elsewhere so he can bang one out, he’ll not wear pants if he dosen’t have to and he’ll certainly hit on Scott just to get a rise out of him, phrasing.. but he also genuinely cares for the guy’s well being. He lets him sleep in their house basically rent free since scott has no money, buys most of their stuff, and is, as we’ll see in this one, the ONLY one of his friends to take an active part in the fight against the exes, training Scott and researching his opponents when he can get info. He won’t baby Scott as seen here, but he will help him, and he will be the harsh voice of reason his friend needs.  And he did TRY doing a softer approach last time, simply telling scott to break up with his fake high school girlfriend. Scott had every chance to dump Knives during the last third of the first book.. it’s just a combination of both Knives and Ramona being in the same place and Scott getting panicky meant he balked. He NEEDS to be pushed into leaving Knives or he’s not gonna. And he also gets it’s not just Scott being a shifty coward: Scott DOES like Knives.. he just found someone who actually challenges him, intrests him and connects with him on his level, versus someone who worships and adores him like a puppy who just happens to be skilled with knives. The relationship with Knives. was an ego boost, an unequal paring that gave Scott the illusion of moving on from Envy. Ramona is him ACTUALLY moving on and given how badly Envy fucked him up, which comes into play in this book and the next, Wallace recognizes that Scott does need her... but this relationship can’t go anywhere if Scott is seeing someone else, and they both know it. Wallace is just the one who’s willing to do something about it to force scott to do something about it. He’s doing this for Knives too: it’s very clear he cares about the girl, was against this from the start, and knew this was going to end in pain and the faster Scott rips off the Band-Aid the faster she can move on to someone closer to her age and far more equal to her. Scott.. takes this about how you’d expect, even calling Double Standard, as Wallace does sleep around.. and while Wallace will be a homewrecker to Stacey.. otherwise it’s not remotley the same. Wallace does his sleeping around either casually or when he does get a partner, with their consent from what we can tell. He never cheats or anything, he just likes to bone. So yeah Scott doesn’t have a leg to stand on and acts accordingly. 

One of my faviorite gags in the series and one that’s etched in my head for keeps. So with a justified Ultimatium over his head Scott calls knives to hang out. Knives.. shows off that as adorable and trusting as she is.. she’s also kind of creepy and shows up just outside the phone booth he’s calling her from.  So the two go to a record store and Knives tries to get Scott into Clash at the Demonhead, her faviorite band. But since i’ts you know, headlined by Scott’s ex as we’ll find out, he’s not into it. But before that can get awkward.. it gets awkward in another way as Knives invites Scott to dinner at her parents place. Which is an objectively bad idea even before you get into the fact Scott wants a way out and as Volume 4 will show us her dad is both not happy with the idea of her dating a white guy and willing to use a katana to prevent it so he dodged a bullet there. Scott TRIES weasling out of it, but his “I’m too old for you” thing falsls on deaf ears.. and actually explains why she thinks this is normal: her parents are 9 years apart. of course obviously two consenting adults with a decade between them is a mite bit diffrent than 5 years between a teenager whose taking this way too seriously and a grown man whose taking this not seroiusly at all and dosen’t get how effed up this is. But Knives is too naive to get that, and papers over any possible concerns about her parents not wanting her to date a white guy with i’m in love.  Seeing that he has no EASY way out of this, as he shouldn’t, Scott just rips off the band aid and bluntly breaks up with her, saying it’s not going to work out. Knives.. is clealry devistatd. To her this was a serious relationship.. and Scott realized that too late.. and thankfully while he didn’t break up with her in the best way, at all, simply syaing i’ts not going to work out and confirming to her he means it, it’s clear from his face this hurts to do and he knows he’s REALLY hurting her and REALLY shoudlnt’ of dated her to begin with. IT’s why Scott dating a teenager dosen’t make him a morally rephrenisvie monster: because he was genuinely intrested, didn’t use her sexually, and there are tangible consequences for his actions. Knives just dosen’t disappear neatly into the sunset so he can be with ramona. The rest of the series covers her emotoinal recovery from being with Scott, and how she very horribly handles it and that’s why this plotline works at all: she’s not some act one contrivance to be thrown away, sh’es a human being, and more than that a young woman who got hurt REALLY bad and got way too in over her head with someone who just..wasn’t the one fo rher no matter how much she can’t admit that. 

We also get one of my faviorite sets of pages as Scott relfects on things and the sheer devistation on Knives face, which credit to a series that even at this early point loves it’s big bold facial expressions.. her’s being more subded just makes it sting MORE. 

This bit to me is vital to keeping Scott sympathetic and to his character. We see he really does regret what happened, dosen’t know how to process it and genuinely feels awful. As I said instead of some exgerated face that would still hurt him.. her face is quiet, clearly unable to process this and clealry lost and hurt.. and that hurts more than any fuck your or sobs he was probably expecting. Just her clearly not getting WHY he’s doing this or why he hurt her, and he KNOWS why he just knows telling her the truth would hurt her even more. But.. as he thinks.. his thoughts move to something else.. and the WHY of why he did this. 

He did it for Ramona. Wallace was as harsh as he was right: he needed a clean slate to actually give this relationship a shot and the smile comes off less as him being a calous dick whose just happy to move on, I mean he is a little, but more jus tsomeone READY to finally move on. He found the right person, he let the wrong one go if clumsily.. he has a future to look forward to and he can smile about that. 

Granted he’s still his usual unteitonally callous self and his way of telling his friends he and knives broke up is to casually say so and say “dont’ worry you’ll meet my new girlfriend soon.” Their reaction.. is my own. 

Look just because Scott is a nuanced douchebag dosne’t stop him from being a Douchebag. It just means he isn’t intolerable to watch and you actually care about him growing as a human being is all. 

So with that out of the way, it’s date night and Ramona is coming over.. also Scott is considering calling her Ramy which no. I'm genuinely in favor of a pet name that’s just a variant on someone’s name but a bit cute, as it’s just the right level of obnoxious, but no, just no Scott. No.  Ramona enters, meets Wallace again and sits down while Scott tries to shoo him out.. because turnabout is fair play bitch. They also see Ramona’s new hair as she dyes it something new for the first time, in this case a very lovely two tone, the purple from last volume but with a darker purple bellow it. I honestly wish she went for multiple colors in her hair again, but likely didn’t since the book was originally in black and white... which still dosent’ make sense as it would’ve been EASIER that way. Regardless Wallace makes himself scarce proving that he’s more than willing to be equal in terms of one of them spending the ngiht elsewhere. What a guy. 

Ramona finds out a few things about Scott: That his apartment is VERY small, just one room with a bed, a cabinet, a small kitchen and a bathroom, which despite what scott says I REALLY dont’ count as another room. Just common sense. She also learns that he can COOK. Yeah while you’d expect Scott to just get a wad of “I did the ultimatum thing okay now gimme” money and buy dinner but no.. he made the whole thing himself from his own recipe.  And once we cut to them eating on the floor.. turns out yeah he not only can cook but is REALLY good at it. She wishes there was a table which, small as the place is.. fair point. I mean at least get some tv trays. You have chairs. Or at least the easy chair. You can get nice padded folding chairs so you have a second chair guys. I know your poor but come on. Also Scott leanrs bread makes you fat. Good stuff. Also Scott freaks out when , while making out with Ramona in bed later, she mentions his hair’s getting kinda long and could use a cut... which turns out to be a thing for him. He isn’t an ass about it he just panics a bit because he’s partially convinced his last relationship’s nightmarish breakup was because of a bad haircut he got. As we’ll see next week, that’s a no but as someone whose a touch neroutic myself I get blaming a larger issue on something trivial. 

So we then get to the next chapter where it’s KIM’S turn to have a dream.. and the only time we see someone else's dreams. Honestly.. I really would’ve liked if it was a recurring device, even have Ramona pop into other people’s Not used ALL the time but I could easily see it being used with Knives to convey her obsession with Scott and her pain or kim again to help move her plots along or Wallace because I want to know what’s going on in his head. It must be a maze of male gentalia and fine liquor the likes of which has never been seen. It’s scotts funeral as Simon killed him and Scott’s corpse wonders if she dreams about this a lot. 

So we see her get ready and wake up her roomate Sarah whose a bitch. And as we’ll see in one of the backups, so’s the rest of her roommates. So drifting into work. Hollie is a character I really liked... the past tense will be explained later. And the first scene is probably why as her and Kim banter effortlessly, with Kim suggesting maybe she was a happy kid... only to admit quickly no she wasn’t, she was pretty withdrawn and then pretty angsty over someasshole who will be named Scott. “Your a holy terror kim, and i’m glad your on your side”> It’s a short scene but the kind this series excells at: just realistic, fun little exchanges bursting with character. I also GENUINELY wish we got more of this kind of thing, as only Knives really gets these kind of scenes to herself for the most part. There ARE scenes without Scott, but not enough like this that just give us as look into what his friends lives are like during the moments they aren’t putting up with his dumbassery or watching him engage in mortal combat. It’s why i’ve been hoping a spinoff will happen even though it likely won’t SOON. I’m sure O’Malley will return to this world some day, but between Snotgirl and Wicked World, which will come out when it’s ready but should be good.. he’s just really busy. But i’d love to see more of Kim.. or Wallace or Knives. The latter two are a no brainer: Knives is the tritagonist of the books, and it’d be intresting to see what she’d be like 5 years at the book, at the same age and stage in life as Scott. And with Wallace it’s because we really DON’T see his friend circle, life or what goes on with him. We hear him talk about a new boyfriend, who we don’t meet until near the end of the series, though you can see him in stage 3 of hte game if your curious, we see him with some random friends in volume 4, but we really don’t KNOW what hyjinks and lojinks wallace gets up to. He’s pretty isoalted from the rest of the main cast, something I hope an adaptation could fix as while realistic i’td be curious to see what his relationship with Kim or Steven would be like. Just food for thought. 

Point is this was a good scene. But as is typical for Kim’s life just when she has some serenity her ex crashes back in. In this case Scott needs to rent some movies, kim works at a rental store and god teenage me really wanted a clerks style spinoff.. but enough spinoff talk. Scott asks kim to bororw them, of course and explains he’s training for his fight with Lucas.. which Kim reacts to finding out her second best friend is in a series of death matches. 

She has understandable questions such as how the hell doe she know that and is he stalking Lucas and just hoping he’s an ex.. which let’s face it would be a very scott move. But nope Wallace told him, likely learning in an interview he dated Ramona or is coming for scott because he knows everything. We also get one of my faviorite exchanges when Kim wonders why Wallace and Scott are roomates.. a valid question he deflects by saying i’ts a long story. 

Also yeah, as much as casting Micheal Cera backfired for the movie.. that panel there proves there wasn’t another choice at the time. When you want a loveable, somewhat douchey, but also somewhat innocent and oblivious slacker.. who you gonna call. Also before we move on.. Kim.. how are you this suprised. You were there for the fight with Matthew. And Ramona giving out the exposition on why he’s there.. and you even did that whole weird space channel 5 thing no one ever did agian and to this day I will never understand what O’Malley was going for and only know the refrence by hearing that’s what it was. Point is you shouldn’t be this suprised.  Anyways we next cut to Ramona and Stacey, as Ramona enters her workplace, second cup, and they talk and Scott’s spider sense goes off... 

I mean it’s just a bad feeling but still.. weird. WE’ll get back to that later. Scott is in the middle of his training.. and I love the mentor side of Wallace and feel it didn’t get used enough as the series went on. As said before he cares about Scott, so he serves as his Shounen Mentor and a great one: he’s stern and makes Scott work, but he also gets his student and what Scott needs to work. I just wish he’d taught Scott some actual combat, but as we see Wallace’s combat skills boil down to yelling useless info from the sidelines.. I mean he can be useful, we’ll see that next week, it’s just he’s not an action guy. But spirtually he’s the guy scott needs to kick his ass into shape. That being said his “training” consists of watching Lucas’ movies, playing tony hawk and when Scott wants to play more Tony Hawk, having Scott do pushups while Wallace plays Tony Hawk.  Before we turn... there is an elephant in the room I just gotta shoo out: Lucas.. is easily the worst setup of the 6 exes. Patel SEEMINGLY comes out of nowhere but his letter and email hint SOMETHING is coming up, and his flashy dynamic entry intro is damn cool and is what turns the series on it’s head, from an indie comic about a guy getting it together.. to that but with huge shonen dustups with epic visuals. Todd is introduced masterfully here, and is a presence from the start of volume 3 as a result, Roxie gets a slight tease in the free comic book day issue, and her not attacking for two months not only sets up tension but allowed for a red herring.. im’ not only hiding that the fourth ex is a she because anyone whose seen the movie or played the game knows the fourth ex is a woman. The cat’s out of the bag, no sense hiding it. The Kentangis show up pretty early on and Gideon is hinted at and built up, as this towering, mysterious figure, his relationship with Ramona, who he is, why he set up the league, and just how fucking strong he is is all obscured, with his only four apperances simply teasing the big final showdown and giving him that much more mysitque. 

Lucas.. is just sorta intorduced like “Hey I gotta fight this guy”. There’s just.. nothing. Scott’s just gotta fight him because he’s next up and Wallace knows that because plot convience. It’s VERY lackluster given what comes before.. and frankly while I like Lucas, he’s the weakest plot and character wise. HE’s not even really EVIL, just a sellout and is more doing this because he has to I guess, and likely because of stuff we find out in Book 6 but sssssshhhhh. We’ll get more into that when the fight happens but it’s one of the books weakest points. The evil ex.. just feels like an afterthrought again despite there being no reason to. Thankfully this would never happen again as I said, but it dosen’t make this any less frustrating. 

So we cut to Sex Bomb-Omb practice, and after that we get more tease for Clash at Demonhead. And Stephen.. is cool with them and entirely happy one of them made it, while Scott is understandably pisssed off about it and not happy one of his best friends is you know, promoting the band of his ex who broke his heart and as we’ll get more into next time, said rising career is what tore them apart. So yeah Stephen’s a dickhead, and I was wrong last time that he got better. He really.. dosen’t. He gets less CREEPY.. but out of the main 6 characters he’s the weakest: he dosen’t have much of an arc, does some very questionable shit in the second half, and his being around means we have to suffer through Julie. I’ll tear into him more on a case by case basis but for once Scott’s not overreacting. While Kim does nothing she also has no idea just HOW bad things were and Scott won’t tell her. Stephen was there the whole fucking time. He just saw Scott’s rebound with a teenager. He knows he was kind of messed up after this. Dosen’t justfiy knives but still he looses the moral high ground he tries to have at times. 

So while Scott shops a song for Ramona to her, Knives calls Scott’s place clearly setting up another suprise apperance. Wallace.. figures out what sh’es doing quick and simply gives her a stern “You have to go” And to me it’s not him being a dick.. he’s both trying to save her from seeing Scott with Ramona and fucking her up worse... and is looking out for her. She needs to move on and moving up to stalking Scott’s not going to help that. Scott dosen’t WANT her anymore, and while he handled it bad, Wallace gets she needs to see that. Granted he could’ve you know explained it to her and tried talking, but as i’ve said he’s not a perfect person and he was also on a time table to get her out of there in case Scott you know, showed up with his new girlfriend and made things a billion times worse. And the two are indeed headed to his place to watch one of Lucas’ movies, and part of that weak setup is that Ramona.. just has no connection with him. It was high school. Scott also pretends he dosent’ remember his. You are a lying liar sir stop that.  So they watch the film together hanging out, and it’s.. really bad. The good one was rented out. I miss rental stores.. a magical time. I mean i’ts better now, streaming means 80% of movies are avaliable if you have a bunch of services and even if you just have netflix or hulu or hbo max, you still get a pretty decent selection each month. Plus digital rentals are super easy. Do miss redbox though. I mean it’s still there I’m just warry of something that relies so heavily on touching things in a state with a lot of trump morons. You CAN get Covid twice and I don’t wanna. Also we get some dated Dialouge as Scott commenting on Lucas being hot, he is good taste Scott, is given a “good job convincing me your not gay”. He and ramona end up having sex though so .. yay? I dunno. The series has a really weird thing about not getting bisexuals exist and as someone whose bi, and really against bi errasure it bothers me, it bothers me a lot. Though given O’Malley apparently has not only far more queer rep in snotgirl but a bisexual lead, he’s clearly learned so i’m not going to drag him too hard on this. It was the early 2000′s. People were pretty damn stupid about this. Creators have gottten MUCH more important issues much worse. 

So the next morning, Scott gets a call from his well meaning but ditzy mom, and reacts like you’d expect. His parents are in Europe to keep them out of the action and what not. Though apparently according to the last book his mom did read volume 3 at least. Or Wallace told her about the relevant bit. You make the call. 

So i’ts Ramona’s turn to meet Sex Bomb-Omb. The group hang out and discuss Gordon Downie. 

Look I don’t know indie bands. I have no idea who the tragically hip are I just know the name is really hipstery. We also get the recipe for Vegan Shepards Pie. None of them are vegan they just wanted to try it and I.. really want to make this some time. Just to see if it’s any good. But yeah it’s in general a fun casual scene, as Kim reveals she and Scott dated, just to break the tension, and Scott tries out Rammy but quickly backpedals. Just fun slice of life stuff. Oh and Knives is watching them from the window and takes Scott dating someone else as well as you’d expect. 

So she gets some hair bleach to do some highlights and calls her friend Tamara over. We met her last volume as she dragged her along to the show, but it’s here we really get to know what she’s like.. i.e. the sane one in the duo, rightfully pointing out Scott’s not that great. Also Knive’s points out ramona’s “fat”, which is thankfully portrayed as petty sniping as while Ramona does have some curves it’s you know.. not remotely a bad thing and the kind of thing a teenage girl would harp on. Still she’s just in STEPS from this happening. 

But yeah.. it’s clear here Knives has some underlying issues to address and really needs therapy  not to go after her ex’s current girlfriend with knives. I mean it’s in the name but still. Then again volume 4 has her dad going around with a katana or something like it wanting to murder her daughter’s older ex boyfriend he dosen’t realize is ex so it’s clear her whole FAMILY needs some therapy. But this does round her out and show there’s more to her.. a pretty violent and obessive side sure, but it shows she wasn’t just some one dimensional ego boost for scott but a person. One whose just as flawed as the rest of the cast.. but more sympatheic because they’ve all got about 6 or 7 years on her and at this age that’s a lifetime. And while Scott DID set this off by dating her which was objecitvely a bad idea... the rest of this isn’t remotely on him. He handled things BAD.... but all he wanted was for both of them to move on. Knives.. simply can’t admit Scott is not a nice person, was probably two timing her as Tamara points out, which as we know he 100% was, and is not some perfect guy she can’t replace: like Knives.. he’s just a person with faults and she’s too blind to see that. 

So before we can get to the crazy stalker ninja fight, let’s instead get to Scott and Ramona hanging out where we meet Gideon, Ramona’s Cat who i’ll call Cat Gideon, both because I love steven unvierse and because it’s less confusing. This is a pretty slight scene as Ramona admits not a lot happened with Lucas and Scott’s apartment is a hole.. which yeah, yeah it is. Also she DEFINTLY dind’t cheat on him with any cocky pretty boys. Which would come off worse if it wasn’t for the pact Ramona was clearly doing it out of regret and Scott just liked like 50 pages ago about rembering his exes when one of them is his second best friend.. which neither would admit but you know it’s true. Stephen is third where he belongs. 

So next morning it’s fight time, and Scott is glad wallace is going with him. It’s awkard going to fights alone. Which leaves me to wonder if before this comic Scott just.. fought random guys letterkenny style. Like they’d call up, schedule it and then he and one or more of his friends would go beat up a guy. It’s just.. hilarious knowing that this kind of thing is common in canda minus the ki attacks , flash effects, wizards, vegan psycics, ninjas, and roboticists. But damn I now want a scott pilgrimized letterkenny now more than ever. You know you do too don’t deny it. I”d love to see the hard right jay fight but iwth a loud “KO!” when he gets his ass knocked out. Also Casa Loma is a very real, very cool Toronto location, as I never realized as a kid, to the point that the lucas fight was filmed there for the movie. 

So Scott approaches Lucas a bit star struck and upon finding out scott is.. punches him out as seen in the header image and throws him into a tower. When Scott regains conciousness, Kim and Neil have arrived and Lucas calls a time out. And it’s here we get to, while being the weakest of the 7, why I like Lucas.. he’s actually a pretty nice guy. At WORST he sold out. But the two have a pretty nice conversation over ritz and baby carrots, with it turning out, unsuprisingly Ramona did cheat on him with a cocky pretty boy, and while like Ramona he’s clearly moved on, it still hurts a bit and understandably so. He also warns scott while she might seem nice i’ts an act. 

I mean it isn’t ALL an act, but she does have a tedency to put up walls and act pretty badly as we’re slowly finding out.. though given Scott does the exact same it only means.. she’s human. She’s not MUCH higher above him in terms of morality and this is where we get our first peaks into the fact the series isn’t just about Scott’s development but hers. But it’s understandably absent from volumes 1 and 2 since we need to know her first, and this volume is about getting to know her a bit and get a feel for who she is, something I ddin’t really get a grip on as a teen, but do now. We see more of who she is good and bad as the walls go down. She’s more SURFACE LEVEL functional than scott, but beneath it has a lot of the same exact issues.  Lucas and Scott continue to GENUINELY bond, as Scott genuinely thinks the guy is talented and Lucas want’s an Oscar this year.. maybe not for the current film which is a romantic comedy with a teen star but hey, stars have done far worse in their Oscar years. I mean at least he’s not making a comedy about himself in a fat suit domestically abusing himself in a wig while he also plays an asian sterotype. He explains he almost didn’t get into the league but felt too important to ramona’s past.. plus he looks cool. Plus they let Patel in despite barely being in a relationship with her and being kind of a tool so they kinda had to let the handsome affiable movie star in. Scott wonders “wait league” and Lucas is understandably frustrated to find out Patel just sent a letter Scott didn’t read.. and at Matthew let’s be clear. I mean.. Gideon has to have known Scott wouldn’t read that since he’s been in his head. We’ll get to that in part 6. Point is they formed a league, hence why their organized enough to come after him like this and Scott understandably glares at Wallace for you know, having him play tony hawk and watch movies yet missing the fucking obvious clue they were all working together and they were only coming at him one at a time by choice. 

Lucas offers to just.. take a bribe and SAY Scott beat him, Scott calls him a sellout jokingly and Lucas proves that while not AS bad as the rest of the League, he’s still a dick by telling him to kiss ramona’s sweet ass goodbye pilgrim. Okay either he’s seen her since high school or he’s fondly remembering a high schooler’s ass. Neither one is nice to think about. But Scott gets out of his ass beating by pointing out a ramp, real thing too used for the movie, and asking him to skate down it. Lucas says i’ts impossible, and Scott just whistles. So Lucas tries skating the impossible and dies via velocity. Yes really. Scott collects his change and gets a gift, a mytryil skateboard he.. can’t use because he dosen’t have a proficency for it and bemoans not picking it up in 5th grade. Also he didn’t get his autograph. He does get some coins though so neat.   Yeah I mentioend Lucas was the least of the exes and I stand by it: He’s an intresting character, not a GREAT person but clearly a charming and nice enough guy who likely offered the bribe not because he’sd a sell out but because he genuinely liked scott, and is easily the best adjusted of the exes. But obviously a near non existant setup and a really hilarious and unsastifying finish just.. don’t really feel sastsifying. I mean i’t slampshaded, but after all the build up of her having 7 evil exes, the next one is just..filler. Not BAD, but not really anything special and giving Scott a an early pokemon victory, but unlike ash having done nothing to really DESERVE it.  Thankfully both adaptations so far VASTLY improved on this. While Lucas is still affiable in the movie he’s also smarmy, if on better terms with Ramona, saying “he seems nice” after the tower throw and throwing in some stunt doubles. His fight goes from one of the least satisfying and weakst of the series, to easily one of the best of the movie. We’ll talk about that more there but obvious Chris Evans version is far superior, keeping the good traits while giving us an intresting fight.. and still keeping the skateboard death because it’s fucking hilarious and the movie improves on THAT too by having scott give flat wows as he slowly dies. The game likewise keeps teh skateboard death, if shortening it, and the skateboard, and while not changing his apperance does make him a hell of a tough boss. Took three tries and some online grinding to take him out. Still a hell of a fight. Point is while I genuinely like Lucas story wise.. this just dosen’t work for me and is pretty damn weak, even if it gives us some godo character insight we could’ve got that, and a fight and still had the finish we did. 

That being said.. we DO get a fight instead, likely why the Lucas fight was so truncated. Next chapter and that evening or the next day or whatever, we pan over the real life tornto refrence library. It is a VERY nice touch thatt the comic and it’s adpations use either real places in toronto or reasonable subsittues. While not canadian myself I love the place and hope to visit Tornoto some day when the world isn’t a living nightmare and it’s really nice that like New York for Marvel, Brian Lee O malley really makes the city feel integral to the comic, like it’s own character. But Knives is ominously perched above.  At second cup Scott is horrified to find Julie. Seconded. Julie takes the moment to give out to scott about him dating Ramona despite telling him no. Okay... 

Yeah as you can probably guess I don’t like Julie. She’s not a good character. The movie did her better, with the bleeping gag and aubrey plaza’s performance, but in the comic.. she’s just the worst. She sucks bad. If she were an ice cream flavor she’d be pralines and dick. While she’s fine on OCCASION, and actually works in the next volume, outside of that she just gets more unplesant, more unlikeable, more bitchy, more unfathomabbly assholish every. damn. volume. I”ll give out about that a bit then too but I have to put up with her for the entire damn comic. Now her being bitchy to Scott is fair to a point: Scott is a mess, and she’s loyal to Envy in the breakup, and Scott’s own friends drag him on a daily basis.  The problems are that she’s like that to EVERYONE, even Knives who isn’t about to stab her much as i’d like that. She’s unberable to Stephen whose tolerance for her is unfathomable, though the ending bits of volume 6 show maybe he just has terrble taste. She’s just a throughly unplesant, social climbing bitch who thinks she’s better than everyone. And it sticks out badly against the main cast; Scott is very bad with women and relating to people, but is also nice, charming and most of the damage he does is not intetional. Ramona puts up walls to keep others out but is also a responsible adult and often cuts through Scott, and at times others, internal bullshit. Wallace is an alcholic, but still a very responsible, very loveable guy who clearly cares about scott and supports him finacially and emotionally. Kim is VERY emotionally distant, very misntrhopic.. but also a good person who as we see as the series goes, has an inner light to her and often drags on Scott because she’s been putting up with his shit the longest and WANTS him to be better. Knives is an obessive and violent stalker.. who was also deeply hurt by an older man, dosen’t GET that her realtionship with scott was wrong and uneven, and is clearly not emtoinallyr eady for the deep feelings she’s having. And Stephen.. well he’s a talented guitarist but also enables scott and julie. Especially him enabling Julie. 

Point is their all pretty well rounded, llikeable characters with flaws. Julie.. is just an ass. And this scene demonstrates that with flying colors. While Scott does ignore her because he’s too worried about his sister and girlfriend becoming friends, understandably given Stacey knows all his dark secrets, Julie spends two pages giving out and treating scott like some bad guy for persuing Ramona against her orders. And i’m going to break down why.. this dosen’t work.. on any level for her.  1) Ramona is not Julie’s property. She’s a big girl with her own free will. They aren’t even remotely close: Julie met her only barely before Scott, and given the dream thing probably not even that. And you could say Julie is just looking out for her... she dosen’t know Ramona well enough to KNOW if Ramona is still smarting over Gideon. She probably was.. but she readily, once the awkwardness passed, went out with scott and dove right into the relationship. While there’s still some scars as we’ll see.. she CHOOSE to move on and that’s her choice. If she wasn’t ready, she woudl’ve turned him down or broke it off by now realizing it was a mistake.  2) Scott has no reason to listen to her. She hates his ass, somewhat justifably but still, she hates him and has been against him since fucking colllege. She took his exes side in the breakup despite Envy still being partly in the wrong but paints him as some abusive dickhead and not just an insesntive dickhead. To him he’s just some villian she needs to reign in for her cool friend who wants nothing to do with her and grows to justifably hate her over time. Scott and Julie TOLERATE each other. They are not friend,s they do not like each other and never will. They are around each other because of Stephen. That is it. If Kim , Wallace or Stephen had asked, or at least made him wait for kinves. he probablyw ould’ve or at least considered it since while they take the piss out of him, they genuinely care about him and actually have shown they care about something other than themselves! Speaking of which the cou de gras 3) She’s a selifsh bitch: She is NEVER not  in any volume seen as out for anyone but herself, and thus scott has no reason to trust her judgement. She berates Stephen, him and anyone who will listen, is only so loyal to envy because she’s famous, and as I said treats EVERYONE like dogshit.  And given Scott is still a very flawed guy.. it takes a LOT for him to be so right and he runs out screaming when Julie mentions her.

So back at the library, Ramona brought Stacey along because the place is a maze. Scott calls Stephen and calls julie evil.. which given the last two paragrahs. Yeah. She is. She really is. But that goes nowhere as he dosen’t have Stacey’s number. He also thinks Julie was responsible for this which while she’s very much not.. would it REALLY be that suprising that if Julie were there she would’ve introdcued the two and set up their little hangout just to piss scott off? God I’m  so sick of talking about her. 

So the two after dropping off Ramona’s package decide to hang out a bit.. not long as Ramona’s got shit to do, but hey I agree with her logic i’m curious about this palce too. But before they can go up an elevator Ramona spots incoming.. and thus we get the fight of the volume. Though given the next one has two climatctic fights and one or two before that, they easily could’ve had both.. this is still the highlight of the volume.  So Ramona snaps off a railing and before Stacey can give out about that she finds out WHY as Knives attacks with a pair of sais. And O’Malley did his homework as while you’d THINK it was just another dumb white person mistake.. O’Malley is asian, thoughw ether he’s candaian korean or canadian chineses, as his last name is korean but he has a large chinese cast in this very comic that might come from experince, I do not know and if you do know tell me. I’d like to refer to him properly as I don’t LIKE lumping all asian cultures into one basket. But not only that he did his home work, as Sai’s, while popularized in Okinawa Japan, were also used in other countries. I bring this up since I assumed it was just a simple mistake even knowing Brian was mixed-race, and was plesantly suprised to fine that know, I was the moron. And i’m fine with admitting that. 

So we get a damn good fight.. and Knives figures out Scott WAS cheating on her. Granted she assumes so due to seeing Ramona at the refrence Library, before he actually cheated and clearly blames Ramona for it, but still, it fucking hurts. Plus while her attacking Ramona, who initally assumes she’s gideon’s doing, which.. yeah sending a teenage assasian just to mess with her head does sound like him. So while Stacey does complain “ramona you can’t just tear out art objects” to which I say... yeah high, Stacey? NOT THE POINT RIGHT NOW SCOTT’S EX IS TRYING TO KILL HER. SHE’S DEFENDING HERSELF.  So we get one hell of a fight. It not only shows off that Ramona is one hell of a fighter herself, as is knives, but just how immature knives is, resorting to constnat fat jokes and taunts showing just how immature she is.. and unlike volume one where it was endearing and we just saw how sweet she was here it just comes off as mean, bitter, and uncomfortable. But again part of the series biggest charm is the main cast are all well fleshed out and throughly human. She’s doint this because she dosen’t know better and was raised in a house where, again as volume 4 will bear out, finding out her dad is going after scott with a samurai sword just warrants a “dad’s are so weird aren’t they” my point is her frame of refrence is a mite skewed. Plus this is a world where everyone but Stacey just calmly accepts big shonen fights break out, so it’s not that unsuaul to want to settle things with a fight and while i’ve joked about her killing Ramona we genuinely don’t know that was the goal> Could’ve been, easily given murder is peachy in this setting and just leads to a respawn according to O’Malley and would’ve just sent ramona back to her apartment. But I genuinely don’t think she has it in her to do it and while she could’ve planend to, she never would’ve. Plus Ramona easily leads the fight as while Knives uses hit and run tactics and tries make her follow.. Ramona is more annoyed than anything as she has shit to do. Knives only gets one hit in and while i’ts a pretty nasty scratch on the cheek, if thankfully not scarring.. Ramona shrugs it off when she brags about it and easily takes knives down with a potted tree. Knives runs and while she tells herself it’s to fight another day.. its really because her opponent was WAY stronger and way more ready for something like this than she probably planned on. She did defintely want a fight, she just wasn’t prepared to be outmatched so handily. It’s also a nice  parallel to last book’s fight: Like with Scott and Matthew,  while the fight SEEMS pretty even, in reality our hero/heroine was alwasy teh one in control and easily took care of the less experinced and less ready upstart, who likely wasn’t expecting a fair fight much less to loose. 

So Ramona and Stacey wisely get out while Stacey explains Knives is indeed Scott’s ex, though is unaware of the cheating thing. Speaking of Scott he’s playing sonic and knuckles, and in fact kept wallace on the line before just to get advice because of course he did hence why stacey didn’t get through to him, but gets a call... from Envy. 

This is easily the second best sequence in the boook, which was lovingly and wonderfully adapted to film and as a result I cannot read it without hearing Brie Larson’s voice for Envy , a nice mixture of seduction and condescension. It’s CLEARLY painful fo rhim, and we do get some things established as Envy toys with him, that it’s been about a year and that she left him for a cocky pretty boy, familiar.. and while Scott claims to not know what he looks like.. given Todd is clearly on her band cover... it’s not exactly hard to put two and two together. So after some awkard catchup and Scott telling her about ramona against his will, we get to the reason she’s here with Scott understanndbly being supscious and calling her a user.. which while Envy denys.. she ends up admitting to. She’s coming to town as estalbished and her opening act backed out, and since Scott has a band, and one that 2/3 of which she knows, she wants them to open for her.  Scott naturally isn’t too intrested and thinks it’s just pity. The sequence. is masterful, using a watchmen style 9 by 9 panel layout and intercutting scott’s pained reactions and clear lack of comfort with flashes of envy on her side.. never showing her proper, but showing his memories or what he’s seen in magazines. It’s really striking and really sells the sheer discomfort Scott’s going through.  So soon after Wallace gets home.. and finds Scott, drained and miserable on the floor, not even responsive. And this really is the scene that shows me that Wallace cares for the guy and cements that asshole he may be, he loves his buddy. He goes through possible scenarios that fit scott: Food poisoning, finding out Wallace saved over his final fantasy save (though he rules it out as last time that happened he was crying), that ramona dumped him.. before Scott let’s out a pathetic and miserable “Ennnnnvvv”. Wallace , who was at ground zero for that relationship as we’ll find out, realizes this and lets out a little shit, unsure how to help and pissed off at that bitch for once again hurting him like this. As I said it shows how Wallace knows scott in and out and loves him dearly.. and how he knwos about this paticuarly heartbreak better than anyone but Scott and Envy themselves. IT’s just a really tearjerking scene, as we get a sense of WHY scott spiraled into an ego boost of a relationship: His last one REALLY tore him in half, and he’s still not completely healed from the emtional bisection. 

So Scott gets more bad news next chapter as Stacey tells him about the fight and he’s worried he’s going to loose ramona on top of this. I mean he desrves it.. .but it’s clear she’s the best thing to happen to him after a really rough year of denial and poor decisionss and loosing her will likely only make him WORSE. He also breaks the bad news, to him at least to the band about the gig. Stephen, being kind of a dick who while understandbly excited about a big gig fails to see his friend REALLY isn’t happy about this nor remembers you know, that the person offering this tore his heart out indiana jones style and while they should take the gig despite the risks, it’s too big an opportunity not to, he should be fucking senstive about this. Kim however... has a suprising and heartbreaking reactoin to this. Which is spread over a few panels but i’m gonna string into one image for convince sake. 

Just.. DAMN. I honeslty missed this both as a teenager and as an adult when I read through the books last time but holy shit is this a heartbreaking little moment, even more with the development she gets in later books. Keep in mind, over two books so far, Kim.. really hasn’t shown a lot of emtion. The most upset she’s gotten was getting a bit pissed about another a girl drummer. The only other time we’ve seen her sad was at 17 when Scott left. Her only emotions that we could see were angry and surly. But here? She’s genuinely upset and we see her walls break down for the very first time.. and it’s with the clear indication she NEVER really got over Scott. She never got proper closure and while she hasn’t let it so.. it’s been VERY clear she's been grossly uncomfortable with how he just likes to brush off their history, something that very clearly still bothers her and understandably so: 6 years , while a lot of time, still really isn’t long enough to just .. FORGET your first boyfriend , how he made you feel or the fact he took your virginity and you took his. Stuff like that sticks with you.. I’m ony assuming on the virginity thing but my point remains: To Scott it’s SEEMINGLY nothing, when really he’s probably just trying to brush it off because he dosen’t like dealing with things and given how Kim is wrongly assumed she can’t feel pain. I mean to anyone else i’d be a fair assumption and even i’m not convinced if she touched a hot stove she’d burn, but that’s phsysical this is emotional. DIffrent playing fields. Point is Scott’s kind of a dick and not having ANY closure for anything, Kim is still smarting from him leaving as much as Scott is smarting from Envy dumping him.  And it somehow gets MORE painful.... which should’ve been the tagline for Bojack Horseman now I think about it but yeah: her line is what cuts me up the most “I saw her on the cover of Now. She’s pretty”. It’s a little line, it’s easy to see why I missed it .. but the subtext really stings. It’s that despite being VERY pretty, I had a crush on her as a kid and I still do now.. Kim just can’t help but compare herself to someone whose now a glamrous rock star.  Their equally attractive but all Kim can see is ANOTHER person who Scott cared about more than her. Which seems petty but again he just.. abnadoned her. His moving wasn’t his choice but his not telling her as was framed earlier sure as hell was. And then just.. look at the next people he dates: A glamorous rock star (She wasn’t at the time but that’s for next week), a much younger girl who can’t possible challenge him, and an ultra cool american. To her.. it must feel like he just looks right through her to every other person intersted in him and never even consdered her as a person anymore. I mean.. jesus christ that hurts.. and makes me hate Stephen more since you know he dosen’t notice any of this.. though at least unlike with Scott it’s a bit more understandable because Kim’s so unflappable and he’s already ignoring very obvious and transparent emotional pain why shouldn’t this be any diffrent.  So yeah no one’s happy about this, and that ends up including Stephen as he’s so insecure about his band’s talent he’s pretty sure they suck when their probably at least adaquate. 

So while Scott dosen’t say anything, it’s clear he’s at least consdiering the offer as when we next see him he and ramona are heading to Envy’s show. And honestly it’s just a really sweet scene as Ramona asks about envy and the two banter and hold hands. A really nice palletee clensar since hte last few pages were like I was the one lucas socked in the gut. Also she assures him she dosen’t hate him, and asks about how the breakup happened, turning down any offers to hear the good times.  It was new years eve one year ago, and he mentions it was over her leaving to meet some guy named Todd.. and Ramona finds the story familiar but brushes off Scott wondering if her todd and Envy’s todd wer ethe same guy as a douchey joke. When prying about what happened otherwise, Scott admits it was all a blur.. Ramona isn’t ahppy with the answer.. but it’s nto like it’s that unresonable: he was in deep with Envy, and the breakup was damn bad to the point it took a year for him to recover and end up in the relationship he is now and the one before this was clearly a cry for help. It also helps reinfroce just how much Wallace was there for him and probably WHY Wallace hates Envy so much. They probably live together simply because Scott needed a place after college, was in zero condition to get a job or do anything given his zombie like state.. and Wallace just had him move into his bed, platonically and into his place. It’s probably why while Wallace will complain ocasoinally he isn’t that on scott to find a job. He dosen’t need a paying roomate, they do fine just on his sallary and he has a steady, secure job in some sort of calling office, probably working in medical stuff like my mom. He needs his friend to be safe and happy, then he can get on his ass about being functional, as he is in present day. If nothing else this volume made me realize just how good a person Wallace is.  The one thing he CAN remember, to Ramona’s disbelif is a restraunt opening up, the job story he hinted at last volume: basically it was a fancy tex mex place called, and this is one of the best restraunt naems in the history of fiction brace yourself: The Gilded Palace of Flying Burritos. Naturally, as would I as I love tex mex and that name, Scott loved the place, ate there most of the week and like me with some places I liked waited impatietly to get a job. He did and they were even super generous as the food was FREE.  Which is a euphoric feeling I relate to, though I also liked any discounts I got. seriously when I worked at Bagel and Bagel a good chunk of my paycheck was eating there for dirt cheap every shift. I miss that place so much. Like even after I left there I still like a good bagel sandwitch. And it wasn’t covid or anything it was just low staffed and slowly coming apart due to a lack of a solid manager after Crystal, the manager who hired me, transfered to a store closer to her home, which I do not blame her for. 

Point is I get it even if Ramona thinks this is all made up. Anyways at Lee’s Place, based on the real life Leo’s place, everyone’s gussied up: Steven got an awful haircut and Kim... 

But no time to dwell on how great kim’s..everything is.. who DID  Neil bring to the concert? 

While Kim is VERY much enjoying this, everyone else is a bit freaked with Ramona getting assurance her and Scott dated breifly, with Kim quipping her and neil will probably date even breiflyer, and Stephen.. freaking out, wondering if she seduced him, and asking if they should take him out back and kick his ass.. 

Just..... that’s a lot of douche to unpack and this review has been VERY long and suprisingly hard already.. but fuck it, we don’t have much left to go let’s do this. Okay one did she seduce him.. I mean I GUESS, but really let’s be clear here: Neil is a horny, lonely, monosolobic 19 year old who lives with his sister’s college friend and whose life revovles around said guys band. Knives is adorable. She likely barely had to flirt with him to get him to say yes .As someone who was a lonely 19 year old doofus, I guarantee no matter the red flags I probably woudl’ve said yes provided she was 18 instead of 17, despite the abudant red flags such as neil vaugely looking like scott, neil being the one single man within scott’s circle to get her way back in, as Knives hasn’t realized she’s bi yet or given how much she looked up to Kim, she probably WOULD’VE gone for it. As would any sane person, which neither knives nor I entirley are. So she didnt’ so much seduce him as offer him a girlfriend he didn’t have and him being too intrested in having a sweet, caring girl on his arm to see the giant army of adrestian soldiers needed to carry all the red flags this presents. 

And as for “do we need to kick his ass. “ Stephen.. did you kick SCOTT’S ass? No, you fucking abetted him and only stepped in for the good girl thing. You did NOTHING to stop his relationship with knives or tell him he was screwing up or look out for that girl’s well being. This will bite him in the ass even harder in volume 5, but even now it just makes him look REALLY fucking bad that, even if he probably dosen’t mean it, that’s at all on the table. Also.. Neil, unlike scott is doing slightly less wrong. While he is 20 to her 17, three years.. it’s HALF of what Scott and her’s age diffrence is, and far more equal in power structure. It’s still not.. GREAT, but my point is you did NOTHING when Scott did this, for far flimiser and less forgiavble reasons.. but when NEIL, whose been nothing but weirdly loyal to you dates her, you want to kick someone’s ass. I mean yes he’s being stupid: in a clear role reversal of the Scott and Knives situation, it’s obvious just from her expression that KNVIES is the one in control here, and the one using someone to ease her own pain. Granted it’s wrong, if not as wrong as Scott should techincally know better and Knives very clearly dosen’t, as well as get into a show of her faviorite band. Is what she’s doing wrong.. yeah... while she can’t see it again it’s what Scott did just not QUITE as fucked up due to not being AS embalanced. Should neil probably be dating her after scott did ? No. But should you be threatning him and not scott for you know, setting all this in motion? No. Jesus christ you suck Steven. 

Thankfully while Scott presumibly calms Stephen down, Kim spots Hollie and her roomate Joseph, who will be suprisingly important. He’s very gay, very quite, very bearded and is only hear because the bass player is hot and when prodded on it....

Well said. Also I read that with John Heder’s voice fo rsome reason.. don’t know why, his career ended as quickly as it began because he REALLY did not pick his films well. He saw that he was going to be in a film with David Spade and Rob Schinder and didn’t fire his agent for suggesting it. Meanwhile Scott and Ramona run into Sandra and Monique, Scott’s old classmates who just sorta.. show up every so oftne, often backing up Julie because every Alpha Bitch needs a posse. As Boscha has proven once you loose your posse you loose your bitchy powers. They also ask if Scott and Ramona are an item which leads to a fantagious visual gag. 

Also Stephen awkardly talks to the new couple, about how much Knives loves the band, and because why start reading the room now just sorta.. CASUALLY slips in the fact he knows her is because she and scott dated. 

Granted Knives action this book really EARNED her that curveball.. but still, it’s transparently clear she’s both not over Scott and Neil’s a placebo, and that she loves the band... how the fuck did you get through college, much less get two loyalish friends Steve. 

Kim tries to hide when she runs into Sarah whose with.. someon O Malley does not know, literally captioning it “I don’t know htis girl”. Fucking love that gag even if SOMEHOW kim is the roomate they all hate. Despite hte fact as the side story will bare out, her roommates are all pretty obnoxious, so i’ts probably because she’s the only sane person in that group and their VERY lucky kim just dind’t set the place on fire on her way out and let god do what he should’ve a long time ago. Also we meet Lynette, the band’s drummer who smokes “She must be evil” “Still hot though”... both accurate. Also Luke wilson is there.. no really. Just holy shit that’s awesome.  Okay so with all of that out of the way, it’s time for the show. So after a full volume’s build up , and a really cool build up in the page before we finally properly meet clash at the demonhead, and miss envy adams. 

Heck of  a reveal and not the only one as ramona realized what the audience probably already guessed....

Dun dun dun! And since I don’t like leaving a cliffhanger dangling lest I have to... we’ll be getting to this next week.. what you thought i’d say right now or tommorow? This was a lot. But no i’m not leaving you too long. Next week, Evil Ex Crossover! Ramona and Wallace become BFF’s! We learn what the deal with Scott and Envy is! Scott faces the Ken to his Ryu! And Wallace gets a boyfriend. All this and more next week. for now...

Final Thoughts: This one.. was a VERY rough one to review and it ties back to this volume’s biggest problem: it is not paced very well. Like the series as a whole it has a pretty easy going, slice of life pace. The only ones without this kind of easy pacing are 3 and 6, and even 3 has some slice of life bits, their just both more focused due to the events going on. This one... well....

Pretty much. While this one has very important stuff going on, Scott and ramona getting closer, ramona getting more fleshed out, Wallace showing how deep his character is, Kim also getting fleshed out quite a bit, Knives showing off her crazy side, setting up the next volume, the second ex fight.. it’s all just kinda.. jumbled together. It’s not really until the knives fight onward the book takes on some really solid pacing and really gets going.It’s not a BAD book: ther’es some REALLY good character stuff as I dug into.. but the pacing is just really loose and without the Evil Ex fight as an anchor and with ramona and scott just sorta.. getting to know one another, in both biblical and non biblical senses, it dosen’t have either of the series main narrative thrusts. Even the knvies subplot really amoutns to nothing for now, as Ramona dosen’t find out Scott’s a cheater, and only distrusts knives now. That’s about it. It does improve on book one in characterization, with eveyrone being MUCH cleearer in terms of who they are and settling into their iconic selves nicely. Wallace’s more selfless and protective side pops up, Ramona starts to show mroe of her personality good and bad, Scott’s better traits are mixed a bit mor eeven with the douche ones,  Knive’s far more unstable and violet stalker side emerges, and Stephen.. well fuck him, point is things are coming together.. but O’Malley still isn’t quite at peak power yet. Not bad and still worth a read like last time, just a bit uneeven is all. That being said... if you want O’Malley at his peak.. well then come back next week. Until then i’ll be doing my usual buisness of reviewing birds, refrencing simpsons and letterkenny, and putting my eyes back in after kim’s look up there. For now the sun’s setting and i’m out of here. 

#scott pilgrim #scott pilgrim vs the world #ramona flowers #kim pine #stephen stiles #wallace wells #envy adams #lucas lee #oni press #Brian Lee O'malley #knives chau #neil nordgraf

[thatnerdnextdoor24]

Under the Mistletoe

I’ve been holding onto this baby all year. Happy holidays!! Enjoy it the best you can with the ones you love

This is Part One. Read Part Two!! 

Ao3

More Kit/Ty

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shadowhunters were never much into Christmas. In this, they and Kit had in common. Johnny Rook thought Christmas as pointless and just another mundane marketing ploy. Though it was strange, when his first Christmas in this new realm approached, it was nice to know that he wouldn't be missing anything.

That's what he had thought, anyway. But it appeared that Tessa and Jem were much more interested in the holiday shenanigans. When Kit had woken on the 1 of December that year, he had come downstairs to find that the ghosts of Christmas past had vomited all over his house. Tinsel draped along the walls, shiny glass ornaments on a humongous tree. The scent of cinnamon drifting in from the kitchen. Then there was Jem and Tessa dancing together in front of the fireplace, Bing Cosby singing holiday cheer from Tessa’s vintage record player. 

It had surprised him to say the least. Then again, Jem and Tessa weren't Shadowhunters anymore. They lived life in between, stuck in the middle of Downworld, Shadowhunters, and mundanes. His first Christmas with them had been daunting. They had opened their arms to him, wanted to give him love and warmth and acceptance. And that almost made it worse. Because Kit didn't know how to act. He felt awkward when someone asked what he wanted for Christmas, and then even more embarrassed when they actually gave him what he had asked for. 

It's taken a few Christmas's for him to get the hang of it. Though Kit thought that a little bit of embarrassment would always stick with him. Now, years later, after adventure, after adventure, after adventure. Christmas came by again, and Kit found that he truly wanted it. He wanted the white snow, the cinnamon cookies, pine trees, candy canes, brightly wrapped presents, and, most importantly; a vision of cuddling by the fire, with the one he loved most. 

It may not have been the first Christmas Kit spent with Ty Blackthorn, but it was the first where the Las Angeles Institute held the annual Christmas party. So maybe that meant something to him. Kit didn't really know exactly why he had decided that it would be this Christmas. This year. This...week. (Was it really so soon?) In which he would finally do it. Over the past years, they had both grown. Up, apart, up again, and back together. If anything. Kit learned what he should have already known. That Christopher Herondale and Tiberius Blackthorn, were written in the stars. Destined to be together, no matter what may come their way. 

So it would be this year, this Christmas. Where Kit would do the most terrifying, horrifying, yet exciting, righteous, thing he had ever done. 

Kit was going to ask Ty to marry him.

And if one was going to marry Tiberius Blackthorn, there were a few things that one needed to do.

First, one needed to notify the rest of the Blackthorn Clan, and let them know that you were marrying their brother. So that's what Kit had done. He had decided three weeks ago that it would be this Christmas, when he proposed to Ty. So, that same day, Kit drove to the house that Julian and Emma shared on the beach, (about a 40 minute drive from Kit and Ty's downtown apartment.) And knocked on the door.

He had been so nervous. When he had sat at the kitchen table with Julian and Emma. They had thought that something was wrong. But Kit had no doubts. None at all. He knew he would have no regrets. "I'm going to ask Ty to marry me." He blurted. Julian had choked on his tea, Emma had beamed. Kit knew he had to finish talking before Julain could start. 

"But I'm not here to ask you for permission. Because that's not your choice, it's Ty's. So really you don't have a say in this. So I'm not asking you for permission. I love Ty. And so do you, and I know that you were more of a father to him than a brother. So it was only fair that you would be the first to know. I love Ty. And I want to marry him." Kit had never felt so sure about anything in his life. 

Julian could see that in the way Kit held himself, in the soft pitch his voice took when he talked about Ty. It was the look in his eyes, and the twitching of his fingers. Kit loved Ty so much that at this moment, nothing else mattered. Julian laughed. Kit jumped in surprise and Emma scooted away, they exchanged a quizzical look while Julian caught his breath. Finally, he sighed, looking up at Kit with a warm smile. "Okay." He said.

Not really what Kit had expected. "Okay?" He and Emma echoed. Julian nodded. "You said you're going to ask Ty to marry you. And I'm telling you 'okay'." His face was beaming, and Kit felt his heart burst and the tension in his shoulders drop. He may not have been there to ask for permission, but it definitely would've been bad if Julain had disapproved.  

It had been such a weight off his shoulders. And once he had said it out loud, to another person, it didn't feel so much like a far off dream. The more people he told, the more right it felt. Because there had been a lot of people to tell. He drove to the L.A. Institute to tell Helen, Aline, and Tavvy. He had to get a portal to New York so he could tell Mark and Christina. Dru had been at the New York Institute with Kit's parabatai, Ash. So he had told them too. Only Ash had already known. Because Ash knew Kit maybe even better than Ty did.

Then he had to tell his side too. And he had to do that before Ash did. (He couldn't keep a secret. Probably a fairie thing.) Jace had been so excited he wanted to call everyone he knew, it was a good thing Clary had been there. Portaling again that day was exhausting, but he made it to Devon. Tessa had beamed, Jem had cried. Mina was nearly as excited as Jace.

It was almost dinner time when he finally got home. Ty had been waiting, laying on the couch with a book in his hands and Irene in his lap. The smile he gave Kit was soft, lovely. It melted Kit completely. He had promptly sat on the floor in front of the couch. Ty raised his arm so Kit could lean his tired head against Ty's chest. Ty let his arm back down, hand tucking into Kit's hair. "Read to me?" Kit asked quietly.

So Ty did.

It had become their norm. For Ty to lay on the couch like this, for Kit to sit like this, for Irene to purr softly while Kit stroked her fur. For Ty to read outloud, in his steady voice. Kit closed his eyes, and was certain once more. He was making the right choice. 

That had been three weeks ago. Three long, stressing, weeks. That mostly consisted of Kit going into jewelry shops, getting nervous and antsy, and running out again before his sticky fingers, well, stuck to anything. 

He had taken Ash with him to a few stores. It helped to have him there when Kit got nervous. But, Ash had to keep squeezing his arm, so often that the store clerks thought that they were the two getting married. Ash found this hilarious and laughed so hard that he nearly knocked over a display case of diamonds. They were then escorted out of the store, and Kit was still ringless.

Kit relayed this dilemma to Dru that night while the three of them were walking through Central Park. The ground was covered in snow, they were all bundled up in their warmest clothes. Despite the cold, Central Park was the only place in New York where Ash didn’t gain a headache from all the iron of the city. They had spent the day in NYC, getting some last minute Christmas shopping done. Being in the city that long, had started to give even Kit a headache. He could only imagine how bad Ash’s head had started pounding, but Ash hadn’t said anything about it. Of course, Kit had been able to tell that his smile didn’t reach his eyes or that he wasn’t completely listening to them. So he had casually steered them in the direction of the park, claiming he was done with shopping for the day.

 Dru gave him a curious look and said, “Just give him your Herondale ring.” Kit blinked at her, and Ash lifted Kit’s right hand up, studying the ring. “I didn’t know this was the Herondale symbol…” he murmured. Kit decided to ignore him for a moment, giving Dru his full attention. She rolled her eyes, “Honestly Kit, do you know anything about Shadowhunter weddings?” 

“....Gold clothes?”

“You’re hopeless.”

 Dru was probably right. To be fair, Kit had never been a part of a shadowhunter marriage. He had only even seen a couple of them. But at least now he had his ring problem sorted. Kit had to admit, exchanging family rings did have something romantic going for it. 

So alerting the Blackthorn Clan; Done.

Getting a ring; Done.

Actually popping the question…

Work in progress. 

Kit spends that night at the New York Institute. They had returned and Dru had pestered him with questions about the engagement and the eventual marriage. Then the rest of the New York Institute residents broke out the drinks and the poker chips. Alec and Magnus were called over, and Kit was not allowed to leave. Not that he really wanted to, either. Even if he did miss Ty, he liked hanging out with friends, too. And he knew that Ty could use some time to himself every now and then. He did text Ty for a moment, letting him know that he wouldn’t be home that night. 

Kit

I’ve been forced into a

game of poker. 

don’t wait up. 

Sherlock <3

How bad are you

losing?

Kit

How do you know 

I’m not winning??

Sherlock <3

I’ve played poker with 

you Kit. You suck at it

Kit

O ye of little faith…

Sherlock <3

It’s not a test of faith. 

You just suck at poker

Kit

I’m crushed.

My own boyfriend 

doesn’t believe in my

Poker face :(

Sherlock <3

Again, how badly are you losing?

Kit

Ash is kicking my ass

Jace is trying to steal

my chips. 

Simon thought we 

were playing black 

jack.

Clary and Isabelle are

cheating and teamed up,

combining their cards.

Magnus is the dealer

and is definitely giving

me bad cards on 

purpose. 

Sherlock <3

I don’t think he is, love. 

Pretty sure you’re just bad at poker.

Kit

Akdsnfskjfsa

stoooooop

I’m gonna win!!!!!!

Sherlock <3

Sure

And when you lose,

 I’ll give you a kiss to make it better. 

Kit

:(

And when I win 

I’ll give YOU a victory kiss

;)

Sherlock <3

Sure you will, baby.

Kit smiled at his phone like an idiot for a moment. When Ty called him “baby”, something just melted right in his chest and he felt like a fifteen year old boy catastrophically in love with his best friend all over again. 

Then Jace tried to steal another one of his chips and Kit had to swat him away and pay attention once more. 

He did finally crawl through a portal home that morning, around eight. But seeing as LA was three hours behind, Kit wasn’t surprised to enter a quiet and warm apartment. Irene lifted her head from where she was curled up on the couch, she yawned at him and then went back to sleep. That was about at warm a welcome as he expected. Kit crept, silently, into the bedroom. Where rumpled sheets and a lover were curled up, tangled in one another. Ty lay on his stomach, arms sprawled out. He was laying on Kit’s side of the bed. 

A smirk graced his lips. For a moment, he leaned against the door frame, and just drank the picture in. The sun was barely coming up, scattering red and orange through the window and across the bed. Ty’s lithe and strong body outlined against the pale bedsheets and the worn quilts his mother had made so long ago. One, red and green for the Christmas season, was pulled up, above his chin. His black, silky, hair spilled just over the top of it.

 Kit could just barely make out Ty’s eyes shutting even tighter against the sunlight filtering in.  Using all his fairie and shadowhunter stealth, Kit pulled the curtain back, blocking out the sun. Ty sighed and relaxed. Carefully, gently, Kit climbed into the bed, beneath the quilts and blankets. He sank into the warm and familiar comfort that always came from being with Ty. Wrapping his arms around Ty’s middle, laying on his side and nuzzling his face into the back of Ty’s neck. He felt Ty hum beneath him. Felt the low baritone rumble through his chest and ripple up his neck. 

He pressed a kiss into his (hopefully) soon to be fiancee’s soft curls. “Go back to sleep,” Kit whispered, the sound barely audible and low and throaty even to his own ears. Ty moved his hand to take Kit’s from where it rested around his waist. “Welcome home,” He murmured, sinking deeper into Kit’s embrace. Kit smiled, “What are you doing on this side of the bed?” He asked, because Ty liked things in order and he liked having his own side of the bed where he could keep his pillows straight and sheets tucked in while Kit’s side of the bed often laid a rumpled mess. “M’mells like you…” Ty trailed. 

Kit feels his entire face heat up, and he’s grinning from ear to ear as he gives Ty another gentle squeeze and a kiss on the back of the head. "Did you win?" Ty asks, he sounds nearly asleep again. Kit chuckles. "Not at all." But Ty has already fallen back asleep, his chest rising and falling in a gentle rhythm. It only takes a few moments, with him breathing in Ty's scent and the blankets warm around him, for Kit to drift off completely.

#look at kit #hes trying his best #just wants to marry his boyfirend #wholesome #kit herondale #kit and ty #kitty #KITTY FLUFF #Ty Blackthorn #tiberius blackthorn #shadowhunters #shadowhunters chronicles #Lord Of Shadows #lady midnight #queen of air and darkness #julian blackthorn #emma carstairs #tessa herondale #tessa gray #tessa carstairs #jem carstairs #Drusilla Blackthorn #dru x ash #dru blackthorn #TY AND KIT AND DRU

[anneshirleywasmychildhood]

Shirbert, plz.

Coffee shop AU: Who is the barista, and who frequents the coffee shop?

So, first off Gilbert is a sleep deprived doctor who need coffee every three hours or he will literally collapse. It also doesn’t help that the barista in the hospital coffee shop is really pretty. He even talks to her some times if he’s pulling the midnight shift and there’s no one around. She’s going to grad school for creative writting and, ironically, doesn’t drink coffee. Prefers tea apparently. Gilbert is kind of suspicious she might be an alien. 

Next Christmas he gives her a bag of really good earl grey tea. She gives him his large coffee with four shots of expresso on the house. A couple months later she invites him to her birthday party. Well, her friend Diana was there dropping off a dress for Anne to wear when Gilbert came in to get his third cup of coffee and she invited him. It was a flapper dress, since Anne was turning 25 and celebrating her roaring 20s with a roaring 20s party. Later that month he got over his nerves and asked her out. She said yes, and later it is revealed that Bash won the hospital betting pool the doctors and nurses set up.

Highschool/College AU: Who is the straight-A student, and who’s the backrow slacker?

Anne is the straight A student. She raises her hand at every opportunity and knows every answer to every question. Her notes were the most meticulous in the entire school. Gilbert, the exact opposite. He never raises his hand, never takes any notes, and never pays attention either. The weird thing? Anne is only 2nd in her class. Gilbert is first. No matter how hard she tries, he tries less, and she still losses to him. Every single time. It doesn’t help that Mr. Phillips kinda hates Anne and gives Gilbert praise just to spite her. Eventually, they join the debate club and their rivalry goes into overdrive. Well, it’s kind of one sided. Anne tries furiously, Gilbert doesn’t try at all. 

Rivals to loves AU: Who takes their rivalry seriously, and who is half in it just to push the other’s buttons?

Just like above, Anne takes their rivalry very seriously but Gilbert just likes the idea of her thinking about him at all. 

Enemies to lovers AU: Which one switches sides?

Gilbert would do anything for Anne, including changing sides. 

Soulmate AU: Who is eager to meet their soulmate? Who absolutely does not want to meet their soulmate?

Anne wants to meet her soulmate so god damn badly. It’s all she’s dreamed about her entire life. At 12 years old, she waits eagerly with Diana to see the first words he will say to her. Then she sees them. “Carrots.” Her face goes as red as her hair. Diana, well versed in Anne’s self esteem issues, immediately assures her that it might not be as bad as it sounds. A few months later, in a nearby hospital, Gilbert and his father stay up late into the night waiting for the words to appear. “Back off, and leave me alone.” Gilbert didn’t know what to say to that. “Well, at least she knows how to speak her mind,” her father said. 

Two years later, his dad is finally out of chemo and they move out of Charlottetown and back to their small village of Avonlea to a very warm welcome. When Anne first sees him and asks about him (she had come to Avonlea after he had left for Charlottetown.) A very nice boy, apparently. Good, he wasn’t someone who would, for example, call her carrots. Josie sees Anne’s smile and quickly reminds her and everyone else that Gilbert belongs to Ruby (Ruby’s soulmate says “hi” the first time he sees her. It did not narrow it down much, so Ruby decided through the power of delusion that it’s Gilbert). Anne nods, and knows that he’s not her soulmate so she should back off. He sees her too, and is entranced. 

In class, they are reading Pride and Prejudice. Anne is completely absorbed in by the book and Gilbert is completely absorbed by Anne. He tries to get her attention but can’t. He leans over to her desk and in a moment of frustration pulls her hair and calls her “Carrots”. She swivels around and uses the hardcover book she was reading to smack him upside the head. “Back off and leave me alone,” she said instinctively, then realised what he had said. He realised what she had said. A small smile spread across his face as horror consumed hers. 

Gilbert pursues her, knowing that they would end up together. Anne is in totally in denial, insisting that just because hers says carrots and his says back off doesn’t mean they are actually soulmates. Eventually, Anne comes around. They have their first kiss and then get married and no, she never again doubted that they belonged together.

Single parent AU: Which one is the single parent? (Alt. if they’re both single parents: Which one is open to starting a new relationship from the start? Which one is never planning on finding love again… Until they meet the other and are instantly smitten?)

Gilbert is the single father to Delphine. Originally her godfather he was forced to assume the role of single parent when her parents died in a care accident. His entire life revolves around her and he would never do anything to jeopardize her happiness. Which is awful because he has been developing a little bit of a crush on her 4th grade teacher, Miss Shirley-Cuthbert. Featuring a young Delphine that attempts to parent trap her dad and her teacher together. Spoiler alert: it works.

Doctor AU: Which one is the long suffering doctor? Which one is the patient?

We all know this one: Gilbert is a doctor. Anne is his clumsy patient.

Bodyguard AU: Who is the bodyguard? Who are they protecting? Which one is secretly pining for the other?

Anne is a highly successful romance writer. Gilbert is meant to protect her. But he has fallen in love with her, and that’s making his job complicated. Anne has found herself having a “protector” side character in every one of her recent books. There was a white knight in “Midnight at Morningstar Castle” who layed down his life to protect the heroine. The scientist in “Stars Above” spent the entire book keeping the heroine safe and though she was in outer space and could only see him though a tiny screen she described him as “incredibly handsome” three times. “Tough Choices in Tough Times” had the protector in the love triangle this time, since he was a humble farmer in the great depression trying to make sure the heroine didn’t have to sell her farm even though she has feelings for the bank manager’s son and if she accepted his marriage proposal she wouldn’t have to worry about the farm. In the end, the bank manager’s son left the bank to live with her on the farm and work the land with her, but there was a lot of fans who liked the protective farmer better. Now she’s nervous because her next book is straight up about a famous gunslinger meant to escort the young daughter of a not so well liked politician across the country to her new fiancée but ends up leaving him to be with her gunslinger. The thing is, she wrote this alone. She only sees Gilbert whenever she goes on a book our so how does she travel across the country with him in 20-ish different cities across the country without letting him know what the book is about because then he might think it’s about him (it totally is, the cowboy is literally called Gilmore) and wacky highjinks ensues.

Pirate AU: Who is the pirate? Who is the member of the royal family who did not sign up for this?

Anne is a pirate and I'm pretty sure I already started this one.

Childhood best friends AU: Which one was super obviously in love with the other the whole time? Who was oblivious until they were older?

It was super obvious to everyone except Anne that Gilbert was in love with her. But it wasn’t till their 10 year reunion that Gilbert confessed to Anne. The next day, Anne broke off her engagement to Roy and asked him if maybe he still had those feelings. He did. They showed up to their 20 year reunion with 3 children.

[kunstpause-archive]

“Be as thirsty for attention as you want”

Easier said then done, I always find self promotion really hard but lets try this and focus on more recent stuff.

I’ve been mostly writing things relevant to @elveny​ and my Dragon Age long story, Precipice of Change. And am I hoping for more people to read it? Definitely! Always. ;)

The setup: Hawke is not one woman but a pair of twins who are (at least on the surface) not all that alike. Features several pairings (Adriene Hawke/Fenris/Isabela & Cassia Hawke/Cullen), pining, a forbidden romance that may or may not be a good idea, politics, from one night stand to lovers, lots of lore exploration, smut and a good dose of humor. 

Elveny wrote a little “why you should read out story” post a while ago, check it out here.  Or check out a small bit from my wip wednesday, where we make Cullen and Anders actually have an elaborate talk about things...

Then I wrote some smaller bits focusing on Cullen and Cassia that I quite like (these can be read stand alone)

Affected - One shot, nsfw, magic-made-them-do-it trope

Under the table - Prompt that turned into a one-shot, nsfw, things one can do to the other under a table for 300 please...

First Meeting - another prompt that went away, fluff, missing scene from the main story but stands on it’s own, all about how they first met

Enchanting Her Knight - humor, we all know Varric wrote a book after he found out about the bit with the chantry sex

Coffee Shop AU - Short AU, very fluffy, then very nsfw

There Are No Stars Left In The City - nsfw Modern AU in which one of them is very, very shady and the other one prone to making bad(or are they?) life choices - ongoing, but it’s completely written

Other recent Dragon Age bits I liked writing:

Two short nsfw prompts for my Surana/Leliana otp 1 2

A nsfw prompt for Amara Lavellan/Adriene Hawke

Two short FFXIV bits

By His Name - WoL/Crystal Exarch pining fluff

The Long Way Home - Elidibus one-shot

Friends, writers, artists, crafters, if you feel like it share some of your things that you want some more attention for! (usual disclaimer, only if you want to of course and if I didn’t tag you feel yourself tagged anyway please!)

@elveny​ @captainderyn​ @tishinada​ @edencalder​ @curiousthimble​ @irlaimsaaralath​ @cornfedcryptid​ @kemvee​ @kittimau​ @faerieavalon​ @zuendwinkel​ @sharkapologists​ @fandomn00blr​ @wardenari​ @dragonifyoudare​ @deathvalleyqueen​ @serial-chillr​ @charlatron​ @midnightprelude​ @anchanted-one​ @faelavellan​

#thirsty thursday #fic rec #Hawke x Cullen #cullen rutherford #Cullen #Hawke #Dragon Age Fanfiction #FFXIV Fanfiction

[am-imagines]

Unknown. - Alex Morgan Imagine.

This is the request for this one little imagine:  Kelley or like Ash or someone analyzing how Alex is only soft for/with the reader but pretty hard and no bs with everyone else. You decide if Alex and r are already together or not. Or they could be together but Kelley only realizes that through her analysation?

I hope you enjoy it, anon!

If there’s one word to describe Alex Morgan, it’s competitive.

That’s why Kelley; sitting right behind Alex as some of you play Uno, can’t understand how you won the last round. It’s not a secret Alex has some of the craziest luck in that specific game: top decking all the time, drawing +4’s like a mad woman, and one time she pulled off the most epic comeback you’ve ever seen.

Now, everyone saw you get to your last card. You were excited at the prospect of winning, but Kelley grimaced at the thought of Alex popping your happy bubble with the +4 in her hand. Except she never used it, and you won; turning to hug her in your excitement.

Despite her huff, the forward was smiling as she returned the gesture.

You didn’t pay much attention to it, but Kelley did. She knows Alex better than anyone. After all, they’re best friends. So, she’s almost dumbfounded to see Alex being less than grumpy after losing a round; unless she did so willingly. Then again, that isn’t like Alex.

From then on, Kelley has decided to take a closer look; to analyze Alex’s behavior and see what else she’s missing. There’s something she can’t see yet, but she will.

The next thing comes in the form of Oreos; one of the few things passing the vegan filter, therefore becoming one of Alex’s favorite snacks.

Oreos disappear from the table on the rare cheat days the team has through the world cup. It’s not a surprise, and Alex makes sure to snatch a whole pack that she doesn’t share with anyone. She eats a cookie or two and saves the rest for later.

But then, the team decides it’s movie night. Everyone rushes to the O’Hara/Morgan room and it’s midway through the movie that Alex offers you the last Oreo in the pack.

You kiss her cheek in gratitude, take a bite and offer her the rest. You’ve never been the biggest fan of Oreos and even if you were, her smile is way sweeter. If you end up falling asleep on Alex’s shoulder, it’s just because T.’s movie choice isn’t that good. Of course, Kelley also notices how Alex plays with your hair and kisses your forehead with a tenderness not often seen in her.

That brings a warm smile to Kelley’s face and she observes just for another second; long enough for Alex to divert her attention to her phone. Even in down time, she’s working.

Sometimes Alex can’t stop running. There’s media to be done, interviews, sponsors to meet, photoshoots before practice and then she has to do it all over again.

A lot of people think Alex is overrated as a player and face of the USWNT. In all honesty, no one can do what she does out of the field and still keep such a high level on it. She puts herself almost impossible goals, but she works harder than anyone to reach them. By the end of the day, she’s outright exhausted, but the world doesn’t know that.

So, when Alex is running, the team steps aside.

She’s tired, cranky and still has a million things to do. Alex has the temper of a lion and can snap when the stress is too high even if she never fails to apologize later on.

You’re not scared of her roar when you approach her: bottle of ice cold water and a packet of nuts in hand. She’s going to be tired and hungry by the time she comes back, but at least a snack can help improve her mood. Or so you hope.

She pauses before leaving the hotel and flashes you a bright smile when you hand her the items. You also remind her to take a break, overworking is not good for anyone.

And Kelley is there; watching from a few feet away.

She notices Alex’s smile and how whatever she says next makes you blush. Kelley notices the way you stare longingly at the empty space she leaves behind when she can’t stay anymore. But you stay in that same place for another minute; hand still raised after waving Alex goodbye one last time.

The fact Alex doesn’t go back to her room that night doesn’t go missing on Kelley, but she doesn’t question it. She has a strong suspicion you two are together although you were particularly careful on your escapade to the roof. You knew Alex would need a breather; a night under the stars with the Eiffel Tower as background was just perfect.

It’s interesting, Kelley decides when you two make it to breakfast together.

Her interest grows when Alex is snapping at everyone on the bus because they’re being too loud. The point with the team is that they’re always obnoxious like that. It’s one of the many reasons you love them. The bus is always loud; filled with music, laughter, Instagram stories in the making and general chatting. That’s the usual, but this time it threatens to split Alex’s head in two with her incoming headache.

You sit next to her before her nerves collapse, or anyone makes a mean comment that will surely spiral into a full-blown argument no one will be able to stop. There’s no need for that.

Without a word, you offer your headphones to Alex. For a moment, she hesitates. Music isn’t really the way to go with a headache, except you don’t want her to listen to anything. On the contrary, you offer her silence in the form of headphones with the best noise cancelling system there can be.

A sigh falls from her lips when she puts them on, and the world becomes silent.

Kelley observes the whole thing and smiles when Alex is the one falling asleep on your shoulder this time around. A twenty-minute nap can do wonders for her spirit, the headache and the rest of the team.

“What’s going on between you two?” Kelley asks you after practice.

“What do you mean?”

You don’t even look at her; too busy changing and wondering where you left your jacket until Alex slips it on. Right, she forgot hers and now is wearing yours.

“I’ve known her for years,” Kelley adds glancing towards number thirteen. “I could swear she has a crush on you.”

“What?”

Your question comes with a squeak, but Kelley doesn’t have time to answer before Alex is whisking you away. You promised her ice cream and she just found the only place in town selling vegan one. You try to find answers on Kelley’s face, but she isn’t looking at you anymore.

Never in your life would you have imagined Alex would have a crush on you. You like her, but she’s Alex Morgan, everybody likes her.

Still, you don’t like her because of the fame or the name. You like her because she’s amazing, sweet and passionate. She shows her passion for soccer, but she loves a good book just as much. She loves romcom movies and popcorn. She loves stargazing and enjoys the beach more than anything.

“I really like you,” you breathe out.

It’s hard to tell what happened for you to be in her arms as she peppers cold kisses all over your face. You’re both laughing, and you can’t stop the words from coming out or the blush spreading on your cheeks afterwards. You are too close to each other when your eyes meet. And you wonder if this is the moment where you’re supposed to close the distance and kiss her.

Alex hasn’t said a word. The lack of response makes you hesitate, and you lick your lips waiting for her to say something; do something.

She finally moves: cups your face and kisses you like you’ve never been kissed before. You have to hold onto her shoulders not to fall. You kiss her back just as gently, letting her take the control of the kiss as it turns into something new and exciting.

It doesn’t matter if you’re in the middle of the street; kissing Alex is liberating. You soar above Heavens at the taste of her lips. You kiss her and she kisses you until the rest of the world fades away.

You see, Kelley O’Hara can be somewhat oblivious but she’s also really damn smart. Finding the smallest thread was enough for her to follow the clues; find the pieces until the picture was complete.

The Oreos and that Uno match were the beginning. The open affection followed along the phone calls and that hint of concern on the forward whenever you got fouled in a game. The longing stares weren’t only yours, and Kelley noticed it all.

Sure, sometimes it takes her a little while, but she can resolve any mystery. And she knew you only needed a subtle push to break the barrier of mutual pining and be more.

When the team walks by the street where you’re still kissing Alex, they don’t bother you. That doesn’t mean they don’t notice, and Ash puts an arm around Kelley’s shoulders.

“About time, uh?”

“Yeah.”

The defender figured it out just like the rest of the team. If her thorough analyzation tells her something is that you and Alex are meant to be together. You are the one capable of loving Alex like nobody else. Kelley knows you’re already falling, and she knows you are the last one to know.

You’ll get there in due time, and if not, Kelley will be there to give you a gentle push.

“Do you want some ice cream?” She asks Ash.

“Sure.”

After all, this is just the beginning.

#alex morgan imagine #alex morgan imagines #uswnt imagine #uswnt imagines #alex morgan x reader #requested #fulfilled prompt

[yeswevegotavideo]

Hi, my name’s (basically) Mercury

So @thegrandwilde​ asked me a question about my internet name, and I realized I’ve never actually explained the entire story of my name in context. Then I realized that, with context, it was an extremely long story, so I thought, “Why not make a whole post about it?” 

It is a long post. I don’t know if it’s an interesting post. It’s interesting to me, at any rate.

If you’re curious, or if you have any interest in etymology, especially the etymology of names, and of the reasons people name themselves, then read on, because I’m about to give a comprehensive account of why I’ve been Mercury on the internet for so long that, for quite a while now, I’ve honestly thought of it as my “real” name in a lot of ways.

So, I was a goth in 8th grade, a grunge-goth really. I was in 8th grade in '95/'96 so like...I basically didn't have a choice in being FUCKING OBSESSED with  grunge and alternative rock in general. And I was really into Courtney Love’s whole aesthetic at the time, so I sometimes did your standard, Riot Grrrl-style babydoll dresses with combat boots look, but also like, cut the hem off of my black hamper bag and wore it over a black slip and called it a skirt because fuck you, society, that’s why.

But the main reason I was a goth in 8th grade, is because in 8th grade, I had an enormous crush on Tara.

Tara was a goth girl who made friends with me just before summer break between 7th & 8th grade. We spent the summer hanging out, and she was kind, and friendly, and beautiful, and very protective of her friends (and especially of me) and within a month, I had a gargantuan crush on her. 

I had known I was bi since I was 11, when I basically came out to my mom (who, despite being kinda’ the worst in a lot of ways, was extremely liberal, and very accepting of my and my brother’s queerness, and of the gay community as a whole. Seriously, my mom was so liberal that my form of teenage political rebellion was being a centrist. God I’m glad I grew out of that shit. Anyway). But Western culture being what it was/is, I had little-to-no understanding of how to talk to, flirt with, or otherwise romantically interact with, girls I liked. That had not changed by 8th grade (honestly, in the ways that count, it has not changed, period). So I spent all of 8th grade pining over Tara, and Tara was the de-facto leader of the rocker girl clique (in the Sacramento suburbs in the 90s, you were either a “rocker” or a “rapper", and rockers did not associate with rappers and vice-versa, because the capital of California, one of the most (and for a few years running, THE most) diverse and integrated cities in the United States, was, and is, a racist, conservative hellscape, and I had way too much internalized racism to even look at rap music so...), and I was in her favor and under her protection. (Looking back, I’m fairly sure Tara had a crush on me too, so it really was your standard wlw standing around confusedly pining for each other in silence sort of situation.)

Which is why, when I came to school after missing a day, and she informed me that, “we all picked nicknames yesterday and there’s only two left, you can either be Mercury or Star,” I was not offended by her providing me with a list of approved nicknames that had been essentially picked clean already. I was, in fact, rather honored that I got to be one of the people who got a nickname at all. I associated Star with the character from the movie The Lost Boys, who I (rather misogynistically, I think now) found to be incredibly irritating.

So I chose Mercury.

That’s not the end of the story. That’s the beginning of the story. So like, buckle up lol.

So to rewind a bit, in 7th grade, I discovered Paganism. 

I was ostensibly raised atheist, but with an understanding that my spiritual beliefs were my own goddamn business and my parents weren’t going to make that kind of a decision for me (again, SUPER LIBERAL parents. To be clear, also SUPER ABUSIVE parents, but like, SUPER LIBERAL about it. Which like, growing up being taught that emotional expression is valid and anti-authoritarianism is cool, but also being punished for being a person with independent thoughts and emotions is...a whole other story. ANYWAY). 

I tried on Christianity for like, half a second, went to church with friends a couple of times, and 7-8 year old me was immediately like, “this is fuckin’ stupid, why did God kill Jesus, he’s God, he’s fucking omnipotent, he could just choose to forgive everybody at like, any time, nobody had to die, what a dick” and decided it wasn’t for me.

But I feel an inherent need for spirituality in-general, a kinship to it. When I played in the mud as a child, I was 100% one of the little girls mixing mud & grass & mint leaves with hose water and “making potions”. For hours.

And when I met a girl in 7th grade whose entire family was Wiccan, I was fascinated. So, it being 1994, I picked up a couple Silver Ravenwolf books and some Scott Cunningham and got to studying. (I know. I KNOW!!! I was 12, there was barely an Internet, it’s hyper-cringy, I get it, don’t judge me.)

The Wiccanism didn’t stick, but the Paganism sure did. (My “official” spiritual descriptor is, “Eclectic, non-denominational kitchen witch”. I worship no gods, but am happy to work with those who don’t require sustained devotion, and I’m pretty into fae lore. There’s also a bunch of personal spiritual belief stuff involving conceptual quantum and molecular physics, like, String Theory and the Multiverse Theory, and anthropological concepts about the power of language and story in human development involved, too. And I’m also very much a skeptic, it’s complicated. “I am vast. I contain multitudes.") 

And around Freshman year, while still figuring stuff out, I came upon the concept of having a magickal name. A secret name that one shares only with the gods or spirits when doing magickal work. And I already had Mercury, a name which was granted and then almost immediately forgotten, because we were 13 and had no fucking attention spans, and Tara moved away, and most of us didn’t even talk to each other anymore and...the name was, therefore, kinda’ perfect.

So I chose it for my ritual work. And then I noticed some weird coincidences. Like, I had a pagan calendar that listed stuff like moon phases and planetary motion, and it associated different planets with different days of the week. And the planet Mercury was associated with Wednesday, which has been my favorite day of the week for most of my life (oh wait, do you...not have a favorite day of the week? Is that just me? Anyway). And when I was in maybe 5th grade, I read this book that was pretty stupid and I didn’t even really enjoy, and I don’t even remember the title of, but it repeatedly used a symbol for “the mark of the devil” in its dumb ghost mystery or whatever, and as much as I disliked the book, I was instantly attracted to the symbol. It looked like this: ☿ I would draw it on things all the time, it was one of my go-to doodles. Guess what the alchemical symbol for Mercury turned out to be?  

So in 1999, when I got a computer that came with an Earthlink subscription, and I was really, truly introduced to the Internet for the first time (and not just like, AOL), there was really only one online handle I could see myself using. After all, I was anonymous, it wasn’t “really” telling people my magickal name if they didn’t know who I was, right? (And honestly, by that point I’d kind-of left that concept behind.) So I used Mercury. And whenever that was already taken, I’d use a combination of those nickname choices from 8th grade: Mercury Star, or Mercurystar. And that eventually evolved into Mercury Starlight. And that’s me! :D

It became my fanfic pseudonym (like almost immediately, because I discovered fanfic in the year 2000 and never looked back), and then on message boards or in forums, people would just, like, call me that. And over time, I really started to like it.

I’ve never liked or felt particularly connected to my given, IRL name. And I actually have a bunch of identity and dissociation issues tied up in it (whole other story, yet again), so like, sometimes hearing people use it makes me really fucking uncomfortable. Like, that’s not really a strong enough word for it. Like, I’ve honestly sometimes wondered if name dysphoria is a thing, like similar to gender dysphoria but like, for your name. I mean, though we most frequently associate the two, dysphoria isn’t actually unique to gender identity. It’s a somewhat generic psychological concept, actually. And names are pretty innately tied to identity and sense of self, and having a name that feels so incongruous with who I am that sometimes when people use it I literally feel physically ill, or depressed, or panicky, or get like, instantly turned off if somebody uses it during sex, like...honestly, that certainly sounds like a type of dysphoria to me. I don’t know.

But every single time somebody online calls me Mercury, I just...I absolutely love it. I light up. I feel seen. It’s...it’s just my fucking name, now, man.

Buuut, I don’t really have the guts to legally change it IRL. Not yet, anyway. We’ll see what the future holds. I don’t know, I think about even just casually asking friends to call me Mercury and just...cringe right the fuck up. It’s scary. What if people think it’s stupid? That I’m being silly? Lose respect for me? I know people change their names all the time, but like, that’s them. But for me? Scaaaary.

Anyway, that’s the story, and if you made it all the way to the end, like, thank you for listening?

#personal #my name #that was a really long way to say 'because a friend gave it to me and it stuck'

[phantomflower42]

Warriors OCs Relationships: My Take, ThunderClan Edition

Let’s face the facts: creating good Warriors OCs in general can be a nightmare.  The Warriors series by Erin Hunter is about four (later five) groups of feral cats called Clans that live in the wild.  They are frequently in competition with one another, but share much of the same culture and traditions.

Part of what makes Warriors OCs a nightmare is that they have a shorter lifespan than humans do.  Feral cats only live around two to five years on average.  That number can be bumped up for Clan cats because they have medicine cats to treat their injuries and illnesses, but only a couple of cats have reached thirteen years old or above.  

The books span a long time period with an Allegiances listing the cats of each Clan in every book.  This equals hundreds of Warriors characters in total.  There are many long family trees.  The family trees have become tangled with several relatives mating with each other.  It’s one of the downsides of the Clan cats being forbidden from mating outside their Clan.

This guide goes to Lost Stars, the first book of the seventh series of Warriors novels.  This mostly deals with children and descendants.  However, if the parents or siblings of a certain character are not known, I will address that as well.  How family members of each line interact in canon will be noted. 

I will keep things simple by listing one main cat per lineage.  Sections will include a cat’s parents, siblings, children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, and cousins if their family tree goes far enough.  I am excluding cats from the prequel Super Editions and novellas; they will be found under a related character’s name from the main books if they are listed at all.  

The exception will be for characters that were named in the main books, but received screen time in side stories later, like Rosetail, her brother Thistleclaw, and Mapleshade.  Characters will be split by Clan.  

Some characters are covered under multiple sections.  Second and onward mentions of a certain character’s family relationships will redirect to where they were first covered.

Any information about Warriors family trees comes from the Warriors Wiki.

(Warning: With the massive amount of characters to cover, this next section will be very long!)

ThunderClan

Bluefur/star: Bluefur/star and her family have had it hard.  Her sister died as a young mother, her mother was killed just a few days after she was apprenticed, her father was neglectful of her and her sister, she had to give up her kits so she could become the ThunderClan leader, one of her kits died on their way to their new home, and she suffered from months of cognitive decline before she gave her life to save ThunderClan from a pack of dogs.  It’s a miracle she has any descendants at this rate.

Any cats coming directly from Bluefur/star’s line will have to come from her daughter Mistyfoot/star’s son Reedwhisker.  Mosskit died on the way to RiverClan, Stonefur does not seem to have had a mate or kits before his death, and Reedwhisker’s littermates died at young ages.  Maybe Stonefur’s love life or lack there of could be explored in stories along with his mate’s reaction to the TigerClan mess.  Reedwhisker seems like he might not mind romance so long as it’s a fellow RIverClan cat.

Bluefur/star could also have indirect descendants through her nephew Whitestorm.  His daughter Sorreltail went on to have six kits; three of them survived long enough to have children of their own.  Sorreltail’s grandson Fernsong had kits with Ivypool later on.

Bluefur/star and her sister Snowfur were close-knit save for some arguments about Thistleclaw.  Their mother Moonflower was a kind and devoted mother until her death.  Stormtail was a poor parent that barely gave his daughters attention.  He started romancing Dappletail before Moonflower died!  Bluefur/star was so bonded to Whitestorm that he was one of the few cats she trusted in her last days.  

Her relationship with her children is more complicated.  She loves them, but Mistyfoot/star and Stonefur hated her at first when they found out the truth.  Bluefur/star harbors guilt for Mosskit’s death, though the latter does not hold her at fault for it.  

Mistyfoot/star and Stonefur were very close.  Mistyfoot/star grieved heavily when he was killed.  She felt deep pain when having to bury her kits Perchkit, Primrosepaw, and Pikepaw.  Her surviving kit Reedwhisker is shown to have a good relationship with her when he shows up in the books.  Mistyfoot/star even picked him as her deputy.

Whitestorm is only mentioned alongside his mate Willowpelt a few times.  They patrolled together near the end of Into the Wild.  He looked upon her proudly after she announced her pregnancy in Forest of Secrets.  That is the extent of their shown relationship. 

Whitestorm’s relationships with his kits are unfortunately not shown much on screen.  The only exception is him informing Fireheart/star that Sorreltail had woken up after Darkstripe poisoned her with deathberries.  Sootfur, Sorreltail, and Rainwhisker are shown to be close.  The latter two did not take it well when Sootfur died in the badger attack in Twilight.

Sorreltail appears to be a good mother throughout the books.  She supports her kits during stressful situations.  She mourned when Honeyfern died, and is mentioned as missing her son Molepaw (who died as a young apprentice).  Sorreltail in fact died because she had gone back to comfort Lilyheart and Seedpaw after the Great Battle was over with.   

Cinderheart, Honeyfern, and Poppyfrost appear to have good relationships with each other.  Their brother Molepaw doesn’t have enough page time to judge how he got along with them before his death.  Lilyheart and Seedpaw were close before Seedpaw’s death, but they do not interact with their surviving older siblings.  That’s odd as Poppyfrost was in the nursery at the time of their birth.  

Cinderheart’s relationships with her kits are not shown.  Poppyfrost is loving but stern towards Cherryfall and Molewhisker.  Cherryfall and Molewhisker spend a lot of time together.  Lilyheart does not interact with her kits much, but does appear to be a great foster mother to Twigbranch.  Larksong, Leafshade, and Honeyfur are close-knit as apprentices.  They don’t spend as much time with each other after being made warriors.  The three of them did not react when their father Snowbush died.

It might be difficult, but a Bluefur/star descendant is not impossible.  Give it a try.

Redtail: This guy had the misfortune of getting murdered by Tigerclaw/star just before Fireheart/star’s arrival to ThunderClan.  He has one kit with Brindleface: Sandstorm.  It’s odd that Sandstorm has no full siblings with how kits usually come in litters.  

Sandstorm gave him two granddaughters, Leafpool and Squirrelflight.  Leafpool had Jayfeather, Lionblaze, and Hollyleaf.  Lionblaze has six kits of his own with Cinderheart.  Squirrelflight kitted Alderheart, Sparkpelt, Juniperkit, and Dandelionkit later.  

Sparkpelt had two kits named Finchkit and Flamekit; their brother Flickerkit was stillborn.  Their father is Larksong.  He died during Squirrelflight’s Hope shortly after Flickerkit from an illness.  

Lionblaze is a good choice for fathering an OC as he seems interested in doing so.  Sparkpelt is an option too.  Jayfeather and Alderheart are not good father material because of being medicine cats, although the concept of a male medicine cat in forbidden love would be great to explore.  Hollyleaf, Juniperkit, and Dandelionkit are out except for AU scenarios with their deaths.

Redtail has several indirect descendants.  His older sister Leopardfoot bore Tigerstar and his dead sisters Mistkit and Nightkit.  This means Brambleclaw/star, Tawnypelt, Hawkfrost, and any kits they have had are relatives of Redtail.  The cat that murdered him was his nephew.  See how confusing the family trees get?

That’s not the worst of it.  His older brother Patchpelt mated once with their sister Willowpelt, resulting in Graystripe.  Graystripe’s kits Feathertail, Stormfur, Blossomfall, Bumblestripe, and Briarlight along with Stormfur’s kits Lark, Pine, Feather, and Breeze and Blossomfall’s kits Eaglewing, Plumstone, Shellfur, and Stemleaf belong to this lineage.  Patchpelt had produced Longtail beforehand with Robinwing.  Neither Longtail or Graystripe are mentioned as having littermates.  Single kitten litters are uncommon.  I wonder what happened...

Willowpelt had more kits than Graystripe.  She mated with three toms in her lifetime: Tawnyspots (who was supposed to have been retired when she was an apprentice from illness and died of said illness shortly afterwards; what happened there?), Patchpelt, and Whitestorm.  Her other kits are Darkstripe, Sootfur, Rainwhisker, and Sorreltail.  Sorreltail lived to have six kits; three of them lived long enough to have children of their own.  Darkstripe, Sootfur, and Rainwhisker died before siring any kits.  It’s a pity with Sootfur and Rainwhisker as they did not receive a lot of screen time.  

Redtail thankfully had a life free of family drama before his murder from what is shown in Bluestar’s Prophecy.  His mother Swiftbreeze cared for her children, and his father Adderfang was a devoted parent that visited the nursery whenever he could.  He got along with his littermates okay.  His relationship with his older siblings is questionable, however.  Leopardfoot and Patchpelt don’t interact with their younger siblings at all, not even to visit their mother after she was done kitting.  Redtail is not seen interacting with Sandstorm either.

Sandstorm loves her kits deeply.  She reminded Firestar to be gentler with Squirrelflight during Midnight as acting stern with her only encouraged her poor behavior.  She was distraught during Squirrelflight’s visit to the Sundrownplace and Leafpool’s capture by Twolegs.  She takes a firm stand when needed, like in Twilight; in that book, she reminded Squirrelflight that her problems shouldn’t get in the way of her duties.  Sandstorm was very worried when Squirrelflight was severely injured in Eclipse.  

Squirrelflight and Leafpool have such a close bond that they literally feel what the other is feeling.  Squirrelflight agreed to act as the foster mother of Leafpool’s kits after some hesitation, an action that eventually endangered her relationship with Brambleclaw/star.  Leafpool carried heavy reservations about hiding the ‘Fire and Tiger’ prophecy from her sister.  

Lionblaze, Jayfeather, and Hollyleaf are close-knit.  They argue a lot with one another because of certain issues like Lionblaze meeting up with Heathertail or Hollyleaf’s faked death, but they remained bonded all the same.  Their father Crowfeather has little if any relationship with them.  Their bonds with Squirrelflight and Leafpool became strained after they found out the latter was their mother, but the trio’s hostility disbursed after the Great Battle.

Lionblaze’s kits are mostly minor characters.  They are not shown or mentioned together much.  Snaptooth and Flywhisker train together in The Raging Storm, but that’s about it.  The only exception is Fernsong.  He acts as a loving mate towards Ivypool.  He offered to move into the nursery to care for their kits.  Ivypool returns his affection.   

Having a descendant of Redtail is definitely possible.  His family is one of the more prolific ones in the series. 

Sparrowpelt/Halftail: Much of Halftail’s origins is a mystery.  It is not known who his parents or siblings were.  He became mates with One-eye.  They had two children: Mousefur and Runningwind.  That’s where his lineage stops.  

Mousefur seemed opposed to having a mate or kits during her lifetime.  The closest things she had to a mate were her friendships with Longtail and Purdy.  She was killed during the Dark Forest battle.

Bluestar once stated that Runningwind did not have the right temperament for mentoring.  Mentoring and parenting involve taking care of and supervising young cats.  Runningwind would therefore not be great father material.  Tigerclaw/star killed him during Rising Storm.   

So, grandchildren of Halftail seem to be a no-go.  His parents, siblings, and older relatives could be expanded on in a fanfiction based in the past, however.

White-eye/One-eye: The oldest cat of ThunderClan has a more detailed family than her mate.  Her mother Harepounce was a selfless cat that starved herself to death to feed her kits during a particularly bad leafbare called the Great Hunger.  Harepounce’s mate Stagleap followed her soon after from starvation-induced illness.  

Speckletail is One-eye’s sister.  This is without counting her foster mother Rainfur, and foster siblings Tawnyspots, Dappletail, and Thrushpelt.  Speckletail bore Lionheart, Goldenflower, Snowkit, and Mistlekit.   Lionheart’s love life is unknown, but Goldenflower kitted Swiftpaw, Tawnypelt, and Brambleclaw/star with an unknown tom and Tigerclaw/star.  

Tawnypelt had Tigerheart/star, Dawnpelt, and Flametail with Rowanclaw/star.  Brambleclaw/star eventually sired Alderheart, Sparkpelt, Dandelionkit, and Juniperkit with Squirrelflight.  Dawnpelt and her mate Crowfrost bore Juniperclaw, Strikestone, and Sleekwhisker.  Tigerheart/star and Dovewing kitted Shadowpaw, Lightleap, and Pouncestep.  

Harepounce loved her kits a lot considering she starved herself to feed them.  Stagleap is not mentioned with his kits given his death early in their lives.  Rainfur cared for the two sisters since she took them in without complaint after Harepounce’s death.  

One-eye and Speckletail patrol together once in Bluestar’s Prophecy, and talk about Willowpelt’s nearly due litter in Rising Storm.  Part of what motivates Speckletail to stay behind from the BloodClan battle in The Darkest Hour is that One-eye and Smallear would barely make it.   

One-eye and Tawnyspots share a bond.  They patrolled together around Sunningrocks once in Bluestar’s Prophecy and sat together during Leopardfoot’s kitting,  Thrushpelt circled them during the latter.  Dappletail and One-eye spent a lot of time together as elders.  Dappletail complained about Tawnyspots’ frequent visits to the dirtplace in Bluestar’s Prophecy.    

Any direct kin is out with Mousefur and Runningwind’s temperaments and demises.  Speckletail’s line has several possibilities, though.  Her daughter Goldenflower bore Brambleclaw/star and Tawnypelt.  Any of their kits are therefore indirect kin of One-eye.  It’s unknown whether or not Speckletail’s son Lionheart sired any kits before he died.  Have fun.

Smallear: This grump does not have a detailed family.  His mate was Speckletail.  They had Goldenflower and Lionheart together.  Making a descendant of Smallear through Goldenflower’s kits and grandchildren is a great possibility.  On the other hand, this means that he mocked his own granddaughter Tawnypelt for being Tigerclaw/star’s kit in The Darkest Hour and led to her leaving ThunderClan.  I know he’s a jerk, but what the heck Smallear?

He and Speckletail are only shown together on a patrol once.  He questions medicine cat Goosefeather over an omen in fresh-kill after a kit-aged Lionheart calls the prey dumb, and reassures him seasons later that he was confined to camp for a good cause when Lionheart had to repair the camp wall.  This means that Smallear had a positive relationship with his son if nothing else.  

Smallear never interacts with his daughter Goldenflower on page.  It’s a missed opportunity.  It was she that mated with Tigerclaw/star and bore his kits.  If Smallear heartlessly taunted Tawnypelt about having Tigerclaw/star for a father, shouldn’t he have also taken his daughter to task for mating with him in the first place?  

Lionheart’s romance life is a clean slate, so maybe you could make kits of his.  Other ideas include making Smallear parents and siblings in a pre-gen fic.   It could be interesting.

Dappletail: Dappletail’s background is iffy.  It’s shown in Goosefeather’s Curse that her mother was a cat named Rainfur and her father was the half-WindClan warrior Windflight.  Her siblings were Tawnyspots and Thrushpelt.  She became the foster sister of One-eye and Speckletail later after their mother Harepounce died.  She seems to get along with all her family.  But, we have no idea who her mate was or who her kits were.

Part of Dappletail’s history is that she had a deaf son that disappeared at three moons old.  He was presumed eaten by a fox.  Who sired him, and who were his siblings?  How did Dappletail react to this when it first happened?  The only thing confirmed is that Bluestar’s father Stormtail did not sire the kits even though he and Dappletail had a romantic relationship.  

Tawnyspots was Darkstripe’s father; the latter was killed before he had any children.  Thrushpelt never had any as he was into Bluefur/star, who did not return his feelings.  

Windflight gave Dappletail half-siblings later in the forms of Thistleclaw, Rosetail, and Sweetpaw.  Thistleclaw sired Whitestorm, who in turn had Sorreltail, Rainwhisker, and Sootfur.  Sorreltail had six kits.  Three of them bore children of their own.  

Sweetpaw died as an apprentice, so she never had the chance to start a romance.  Rosetail’s love life is not known, however.  

Dappletail’s relationships with her mother, father, and siblings are not shown in detail.  They are minor characters.  She helped prepare Sweetpaw’s body for her vigil.  Thrushpelt once took out her apprentice Goldenflower when an injury forced her to remain in camp.  She also complained about Tawnyspots’ illness causing him to walk in and out of the warrior’s den all night.  She was a little sad when mentioning her dead son in A Dangerous Path.  That's the extent of her interaction with her family.

Go wild with Dappletail relatives.  She has several holes to fill up.

Frostfur: In contrast to other characters, Frostfur’s line is very detailed.  Her mother was an experienced queen named Robinwing, and her father Fuzzypelt retired soon after she and her sister Brindleface became warriors.  Her parents later had Dustpelt and Ravenpaw.  

It is stated when Robinwing kitted Frostfur and Brindleface that they were not her first litter.  Yet, we never see these older siblings.  What happened to them?  Did they die, or were they just off-screen?

Frostfur bore Cinderpelt, Brackenfur, Thornclaw, and Brightheart shortly before Into The Wild.  It’s not stated or hinted who fathered them.  Maybe your story involves solving that mystery.  She has plenty of descendants. 

Brackenfur sired Sorreltail’s six kits.  Their three living kits Poppyfrost, Cinderheart, and Lilyheart had children.  Cinderheart’s son Larksong sired Sparkpelt’s kits.  Larksong’s siblings Hollytuft and Sorrelstripe have not been seen often enough to know if they desire families or not.  

Poppyfrost’s kits Molewhisker and Cherryfall are clean slates for romance, although Cherryfall had some moments with Stormcloud in Bramblestar’s Storm.  Lilyheart’s kits were all just made warriors in Shattered Sky, so they need time to grow up before becoming parents.

Thornclaw became a late in life parent in Shattered Sky.  His mate Blossomfall had Eaglewing, Plumstone, Shellfur, and Stemleaf.  They are minor characters, but got along well enough as kits.  They also share a bond with their grandfather Graystripe.  It’s unknown if they want kits or not.  Stemleaf is stated to like a cat, but has not mentioned a desire to raise a family

Brightheart got together with Cloudtail.  She bore Whitewing, Ambermoon, Dewnose, and Snowbush.  Whitewing bore Dovewing and Ivypool.  Dovewing kitted a litter of three with Tigerheart/star in Tigerheart’s Shadow.  Ivypool and Fernsong seem to have gotten together.  

Ambermoon and Dewnose do not show signs of romance or lack there of.  Snowbush sired Honeyfur, Leafshine, and Larksong with Sorreltail’s daughter Lilyheart before he died in Darkest Night.  Larksong had a romance with Sparkpelt and sired her kits before dying in Squirrelflight’s Hope.

Frostfur’s sister Brindleface had two kits that died early, Sandstorm, Ferncloud, and Ashfur.  Perhaps stories could take a look at Brindleface’s two young dead kits to explore what they were like, what they were named, and how they interacted with their siblings before their deaths.

Sandstorm mated with Fireheart/star, resulting in Squirrelflight and Leafpool.  Leafpool gave birth to Jayfeather, Hollyleaf, and Lionblaze.  Lionblaze had six kits with Cinderheart.  Squirrelflight bore Alderheart, Sparkpelt, Dandelionkit, and Juniperkit later on.  Sparkpelt is a good choice, Alderheart can’t legally take a mate as a medicine cat, and the latter two are dead.  Dandelionkit and Juniperkit have not even been seen in StarClan when Alderheart visits, which seems like a missed opportunity.  

Ferncloud got together with Dustpelt... who is also her uncle.  It seems the authors should have been more careful when making the family trees.  She bore Spiderleg, Shrewpaw, Birchfall, Hollykit, Larchkit, Icecloud, and Foxleap.  Only Birchfall is still alive as of this writing.  He and Spiderleg were the only ones to have kits of their own.

Spiderleg sired Rosepetal and Toadstep with Daisy.  Toadstep died in between The Last Hope and Bramblestar’s Storm.  Rosepetal has shown signs of liking Bumblestripe.  Their line is definitely a possibility.    

Birchfall had Dovewing and Ivypool with Whitewing.  Dovewing has three  kits with Tigerheart/star as of Tigerheart’s Shadow.  Ivypool became mates with Fernsong, who seems very eager to help out in the nursery.  Dovewing and Ivypool’s friendship has suffered from the former’s meetings with Tigerheart/star.  It’s unknown how Dovewing leaving ThunderClan has affected her relations with her parents, but the fallout may be negative.

Frostfur’s brother Dustpelt has one of the most prolific lines in the series with his mate and niece Ferncloud.  Their kits are listed under Ferncloud’s subsection.  Dustpelt took her death very hard.  Icecloud and Foxleap’s deaths coming very soon after their mother’s demise likely added to his grief.  

Last is Ravenpaw, who seems to be the least favorite sibling of the family.  He was canonically shown as having a close relationship with Barley.  He has never wanted a mate or kits.  The Warriors series is meant for children, so they can’t show explicit LBGTQ relationships without getting into trouble.  The way Ravenpaw’s relatives treated him before he left ThunderClan is questionable.

Vicky Holmes has gone on record to say that Dustpelt would do everything to deny his relation with Ravenpaw.  Dustpelt was shown attacking him when he was stripping down a leaf near the end of Bluestar’s Prophecy.  He accused Ravenpaw of being a WindClan spy at first during the Warriors manga A Clan in Need when Ravenpaw diverted a confrontation between a WindClan and ThunderClan patrol over a missing kit.       

Brindleface is never shown interacting with Ravenpaw or Dustpelt very much.  She did have a good relationship with Frostfur, however.  They spent time around each other, and had their litters around the same time.  That speaks louder than words.

Frostfur acted aggressively towards Ravenpaw when he strayed near the nursery after Tigerclaw/star accused him of stealing her kits during Into The Wild.  While her behavior could be excused if the Warriors series was more realistic about cat behavior (that is, adult toms would not be permitted around the nursery area at all), it doesn’t click as the characters are humanized.  Why did she believe Tigerclaw/star’s lie?  Why didn’t she see through it and stick up for her little brother?  Did she regret her actions when she found out the truth? 

The only family members innocent of wrongdoing with Ravenpaw are his parents.  Robinwing was said to have been very patient with him near the end of Bluestar’s Prophecy.  Fuzzypelt seemed decent enough, and was an elder when he and his mate had Ravenpaw and Dustpelt.  He likely died shortly after they were born.

There are many Frostfur descendants to choose from, and family drama to be had. 

Fireheart/star: As fitting of the main character of the first series, his family has been elaborated on with time.  His mother Nutmeg was a kittypet who had no idea of what her son was up to.  His father Jake was also a kittypet; he was a lot more adventurous than his mate.  Fireheart/star had several siblings, including his sister Princess.  He unknowingly killed his half-brother Scourge when BloodClan threatened the forest

He and Sandstorm came together, which resulted in Squirrelflight and Leafpool’s births.  Leafpool kitted Jayfeather, Hollyleaf, and Lionblaze.  Lionblaze now has six kits of his own.  Jayfeather is not a good mate choice with him being a medicine cat and snappish temperament, although it could come about in the right circumstance.  Hollyleaf is not around for having kits except for AU stories with her death in The Last Hope.  

Squirrelflight bore Sparkpelt, Alderheart, Juniperkit, and Dandelionkit as an older cat.  Sparkpelt is a good option.  Alderheart is not a great choice for siring kits because of him being a medicine cat.  Juniperkit and Dandelionkit died young, so they are not options outside of AUs

Fireheart/star’s sister Princess gave him his nephew Cloudtail to raise.  Cloudtail sired Whitewing, Ambermoon, Dewnose, and Snowbush with Brightheart.  Whitewing kitted Dovewing and Ivypool with Birchfall.  Dovewing had Lightleap, Shadowpaw, and Pouncestep with Tigerheart/star.  Ivypool appears likely to have kits with Lionblaze’s son Fernsong soon.  

Ambermoon and Dewnose do not show signs of romance or lack there of.  Go wild with them.  Snowbush had Larksong, Leafshine, and Honeyfur with Lilyheart before he died in Darkest Night.  

Cloudtail had littermates.  It would be cool to see what happened to them.  Have a field day.  One of them might have had kits later that the rest of Fireheart/star’s line are unaware about.

Speaking of which, why not write about Fireheart/star and Princess’ littermates?  Princess mentioned once that she sometimes met up with them.  How did their lives turn out after the Clans left?  Did any of them leave Fireheart/star and Princess nieces and nephews?

Lastly, there is Fireheart/star’s half-brother Scourge and his siblings Ruby and Socks.  Scourge did not seem like the nurturing or romantic type, so him having kits before his death seems unlikely.  Ruby and Socks were forced on the streets as loners.  They lived at least a few years after their brother’s death according to the fifth Erin Hunter chat.  They could have found love.  Ruby and Socks’ relationship with Scourge was hostile with them bullying him as a kit.

Firestar appeared to have a lot of love for his daughters, although his time interacting with them diminished before his death.  He was tougher on Hollyleaf, Jayfeather, and Lionblaze; they still had a lot of respect for him.  He acts more supportive of Alderheart when he is seen in StarClan.  He experienced a close relationship with his sister Princess until the Clans left the forest.  He has not interacted with his other littermates, Cloudtail’s siblings, or Squirrelflight’s non-medicine cat kits in the actual books, so his relationship with them is not known.

Lionblaze, Jayfeather, and Hollyleaf are close-knit.  They argue a lot with one another because of certain issues like Lionblaze meeting up with Heathertail or Hollyleaf’s faked death, but they remained bonded all the same.  Their father Crowfeather has little if any relationship with them.  Their bonds with Squirrelflight and Leafpool became strained after they found out the latter was their mother, but the trio’s hostility disbursed after the Great Battle.      

So, there are plenty of options for a Fireheart/star descendant.  Have fun.

Daisy: Daisy gets a lot of flak for staying in the nursery.  For all of that, she had only taken two mates (Smoky and Spiderleg) and bore five kits.  Smoky sired Berrynose, Hazeltail, and Mousewhisker.  Spiderleg fathered Toadstep and Rosepetal.

Berrynose had Cherryfall and Molewhisker with Poppyfrost.  Neither of them have shown signs of romantic preferences outside of some moments Cherryfall had with Stormcloud in Bramblestar’s Storm.  Cherryfall and Molewhisker could have kits if the circumstances are right.

Mousewhisker has not had enough time on page to indicate if he wants a family or not.  He has become a very minor character in recent books.  He is another option.

Hazeltail and Toadstep are not around for romance or kits outside of AUs.  They both died between The Last Hope and Bramblestar’s Storm.

Rosepetal has shown signs of being attracted to Bumblestripe.  She’s a good choice for a Daisy descendant.  

Daisy is a loving if protective mother.  Her children seem to get along okay.  They are sometimes mentioned as taking duties together.  Hazeltail is very excited when Toadstep and Rosepetal are first born.  Unfortunately, they are not mentioned too often because of being minor characters.  We don’t even see Daisy or her surviving kits’ reactions to Toadstep and Hazeltail’s deaths.  That seems like hasty writing to me.  

A Daisy descendant is a good choice.

Stormcloud: This poor cat is a former kittypet that joined ThunderClan after a flood made him lose his home.  He also lost his brother Benny in the flood.  He has shown chemistry with Cherryfall. so kits with her are a possibility.  

None of Stormcloud’s relatives except for Benny are known.  Did he have any other siblings that lived in a different house?  Who were his parents?  How would any of his remaining family react to his new life? 

Give kin of Stormcloud a go.

Mapleshade: Before starting on Mapleshade’s section, I would like to say that how her Clan handled her forbidden relationship with Appledusk was atrocious.  A leader banished three two-moon old kits with their mother, a warrior referred to the kits as ‘creatures’, said warrior watched them drown in the river without helping them, and the mother’s RiverClan mate Appledusk got off scot-free.

With that in mind, where are Mapleshade’s parents, siblings, or other kin?  ThunderClan is shown to be very low in numbers in Mapleshade’s Vengeance; Mapleshade is the only queen at that time.  Even if she had betrayed the first law of the warrior code, her family would have stood up for her.  They could have pointed out that banishing her would mean four less ThunderClan cats later.  They could have reminded Oakstar that banishing kits for their mother’s crimes was wrong and perhaps a breach of the twelfth law of the warrior code.  

A direct Mapleshade descendant is out with Patchkit, Petalkit, and Larchkit’s deaths.  But, maybe she did have a sibling somewhere that had kits later.  This could lead into several dark story possibilities.  

#warriors warriorcats ocguide ocrelationshipguide thunderclan

[moonfireflight]

Fanfic Asks etc.

 I snagged this from @phoenixsavant . Procrastinating and I’m also feeling lazy, but, here we go! 

1. If you’re an author, how many WIPs do you currently have? (Be honest!)  

Eight-ish? Oh no... Some sacrilicious God Seven super inappropriate role play shenanigans. MC and Saeyoung go to a haunted house and both enjoy her getting scared, plus she’s dressed like a cute cat girl so you can imagine how that goes. I have notes and a few lines for chapter 5 of I Could Teach You. I’m working on Manifest Destiny with PS. I have a word doc titled “Come Closer” that basically has 20 words in it but they are all hot. I legit don’t know if I’ll ever finish Grim Fairytale because I feel bad for putting everyone in that situation. If I don’t just pretend everyone was rescued and it worked out great for all involved. Error: Impossible Memories needs more love. Maybe it will get an NSFW followup. And, to completely mix things up, I have an outline for some really gross Silent Hill fic involving Pyramid Head. I came up with the idea years ago, so it might get some love one day. 

2. What’s next on your ‘to-read’ list? (Fan fiction or otherwise)

I have a lot of tabs of fic to get around to. For actual novels, I’m wanting to finish reading “Tarkin” by James Luceno, because Star Wars villains are one of my other great loves. 

3. Do you prefer canonverse or AUs?

For the longest time, I couldn’t stand AUs but I’ll take either now if they are well done and enjoyable. AUs give new ways to explore characters, which is fun. I guess Error: Impossible Memories, and this Other Thing I Wrote Which No One Shall Ever See, AND Manifest Destiny all count as AUs.

4. What fandom’s/ship’s fan fiction do you read the most?

Mystic Messenger, Saeyoung x MC (shock). Also, Star Wars, Kylo x Hux. 

5. What’s a crackship you love?

Hmm, most of my crackships are from Homestuck, pffff.  How about Dirk Strider X Equius? Some folks might still think Vanderwood x Jaehee is a crackship, but I freaking love it in Salvation and want more of it. 

6. What’s the last thing you read that made you laugh?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/8570734 This fic has some great bits that made me giggle. I just found it this morning. It’s domestic, loving, fluffy, hot hot hot Saeyoung x MC <3 

7. What’s the last thing you read that made you cry?

“You Don’t Deserve her” series by @reifromrfa <-- Stealing PS’s answer because AAAaaaaahhhh -clutches chest-

8. Bed sharing or roommates AU?

Roommates. It has potential for hilarity and awkwardness.  

9. Fake dating or arranged marriage?

Fake dating. MORE awkwardness. All of the awkwardness. I thrive on it. 

10. Mutual pining or enemies to friends to lovers?

Oh this is a tough choice! I really like both, wow. Mutual pining probably because I love a good slow burn. Enemies straight to lovers, do not pass go, though...

11. Kid fic or childhood friends?

Childhood friends

12. Friends with benefits or secret dating?

Hmmm, secret dating probably. 

13. Exes or established relationship?

Established relationship for sure. I mean, that’s 99% of what I write.  These two are already together, let’s just have fun from there. 

14. (For authors) Post a line of dialogue from one of your WIPs without context.

(Oh uh well, this pretty much tells you exactly what you are in for with my “sacrilicious fic”:)

“Your lips speak your confession clearly, and you are forgiven.” “You are so merciful, God Seven, thank you.” 

   -sweats- 

15. Post the last line you wrote without context.

(Well it’s from the thing I’ll never post, so you’ll never get context anyway, mwahaha!!!) Okay, time to try something else… “I’m going to try another little experiment. Is that OK?”

He looked adorably dazed. “Hmm, what? Yes, please, whatever you want to try.” His response was positively breathless. I just knew somewhere, the authors of the various books I’d read on magic were rolling in their graves. Well, they were missing out.

16. Describe your WIP that currently has the highest word count.

Well heck, that’s still “Mercy Me” (tentative title). MC and Saeyoung decided to cook a nice dinner and invite Yoosung over. MC kept teasing Saeyoung all day with gross stuff she found online, and is being a bit of a brat. After Yoosung leaves, Sae decides it’s time to make MC repent for her wicked ways. Oils, candle wax, and honey are involved... 

17. Describe a fic that is still in the ‘ideas’ stage.

"Come Closer” It’s just more of the same thing I can’t stop writing. It was inspired by a work of fan art I need to find again before I post it. Kind of a game of Seven says for “poor” MC. 

18. Do you have a fic reading/writing routine?

No routine for reading. However, writing typically involves me listening to the same one or two songs on repeat so it puts me in whatever mood I’m writing without distracting me, and a lot of flailing around, grousing, and procrastinating on the actual process. 

19. What’s your favorite character headcanon?

I posted most of that already, but hmm... How about, even though Saeyoung and MC have been together for a while, if she’s really forward with him, he still turns into a flustered, blushing mess. Well, at first anyway. 

[drinix]

Forevermore

Caspian x reader

This is my first ever fanfic request. Thank you so much @padfootagain for requesting this and of course, sorry that it took ages for me to publish this snippet on tumblr!! I used some quotes so that I could bring out the fluffiness of the story. Hope you would like it!

You are sitting by the window, trying to concentrate on the book you are reading. It is your most favorite book in the Royal library in Cair Paravel. He knows that you love that book. He knows that you love books. So he made sure that you wouldn't feel lonely by adding a lot of books to the library.

He wanted to make sure that you were surrounded by things you loved while he was attending to his official duties. However much he wanted to be with you, his title and the responsibilities that followed left you both desperate sometimes. He is no ordinary man to love. He is the King of Narnia. Caspian the Tenth.

You came to Narnia with the Pevensies before the war of deliverance. A shy, taciturn girl you were of course. But it didn't make him difficult to fall in love with you. You became friends soon. Stayed with each other through thick and thin always. It didn't take much time for that friendship to blossom into love. You still remember how worried Caspian was to see you injured after the battle. He stayed besides you every night and day to make sure if you were well cared.

The day he confessed that he was in love with you.

It was the most ecstatic day of your life. You were sitting in your favourite place gazing at the stars that night. He stood next to you but he wasn't staring at the stars instead he was gazing at you. He loved the way How your eyes sparkled as you told him about the constellation. He loved the way how your hair fell down with your hair locks dancing in the wind. Above all he loved the way you smiled. He was so enchanted whenever he saw that beautiful smile adorned your lips and how it made your rosy cheeks go pink.

He loved all of you. All other women of Narnia are at his feet still, yet you are the one who stole his heart. You love not his crown but him.

Sometimes he caught himself smiling alone without no reason and realized he was thinking about you. You stare through the thick panel of glasses again. The rain has started to fall down. You love rain. You love the chilly shivers it gives you so that you could find it as an excuse to nuzzle in his arms. You turn back to see the empty space beside you. He is not at the castle. Caspian had to leave Cair Paravel to sail to the Lone Islands for diplomatic reasons. Before his departure, he gave you the book you are trying to read now, saying "Wait for me, sweetheart. " He wanted to feel that you were waiting for him and he knew you would.

When you turn over to the next page, you feel that something is hidden among the pages of the book. So you flip over to see what it is. A letter in parchment paper is folded and safely attached to the page. At a glimpse your know who has written that.

To my beloved y/n,

By the time you read this, I'll be very far from you sailing to the east towards the Lone Islands. I wanted to write this because I know that you're lonely without me, my love and I miss you much too. I'm on the deck and watching the stars. I can see clusters of stars sparkling and shimmering in the sky. They are so dazzling! Do you remember the first day we met? And the day you told me that you loved me? I still remember how you smiled shyly when I said that. It wasn't only your beauty that captivated me. Your grace and your kindness to people was one of the reasons too.

Your smile can bring happiness to an aching heart and soul. It's your smile I long to see when I get back home. It's your smile that I yearn for after a tiresome day in the counsel. It's your arms I want to be in when the whole world is pressing me down. You saw my insecurities that no one else could see. It is you who bring a smile to my face everytime. If it wasn't for you, my love, I wouldn't be who I am today. Everyday I'm grateful to great Aslan for giving me you. Whenever I am with you, I'm being myself.

You know that dork and goofball in me. Don't you ? I love every time you call me that I'm a dork. Nobody ever dares to call their king a dork except you my love. However far away I will always love you. Wherever you are, whoever you are with I'll truly, honestly, completely love you and nothing will ever change that. You're meant to me my whole world and you are the only shelter in this world for me and at the end of the day, it'll always be you that my thoughts linger upon, my sunshine. I feel your absence very much. When I come back to you, wait for me with your beautiful smile.

Forever yours, Caspian X.

Love is not perfect or flawless. It's messy and honestly that's the beauty of it. You were messy while he was well-organized. You always left his wardrobe in an utter clutter whenever your went on rummaging for his shirts. You loved wearing his clothes. He loved to see you wearing them. You remembered the day you tried to wear his crown while he was busy looking for the purple shirt he loved. When he stepped into his room he caught you wearing his crown and his shirt. A smile settled on his face as he saw you......

"Honey have you seen my shirt? " His voice made you gasp.  You were caught red handed.

"Er... I.. " You started stuttering.

"Yes ?" He raised his dark brows with a mischievous look "I see, my queen " He teased you. He loved the way you blushed as he caught you wearing his crown.

He took a step towards you, brushing your hair locks behind your ear. "Do you know the punishments for stealing the king's crown? " He noticed the fear in your eyes.

"I'm sorry. " You said taking off his crown and giving it to him.

He smiled at you as he caressed your cheek. "I'm not going to send you it prison for that. I was just teasing you. " He placed a kiss on your forehead. It was filled with love and respect. He knew that his touch always calmed you.

He placed the crown on your head again. "You're look so beautiful my queen "

It made you smile. "Do I look like King Caspian now? "

"Mmm... Very much " He said pulling you closer and nestling you in his arms.

Raindrops start beating against the window, leaving the glasses covered with mist. You wipe them so that you can have a glimpse at the great eastern sea. You are waiting for the sight of his ship Dawn Treader. Darkness is starting to engulf the castle that makes you rush to the Astronomy tower to gaze at the stars.

Caspian is on the deck of the Dawn Treader, viewing the constellation through a telescope. He misses your presence, your silly jokes. He is pining for all of you. Whenever the sweet reminiscences of you cross his mind, a loving smile lingeres on his lips. Dawn Treader is slowly gliding her way back to Narnia at the command of her gallant King who is so uneasy to get back to his home. He did not know what home meant till the day he found you and felt the closeness of you. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with you so that when he said he was going home, he really meant it. It is you who made him realize that home is not a place but a person.

He has already made his choice. He knowd that he has met the love of his life and it is you. He is miles away from the one he loved. It is killing him. The stars would lead him back to you.

Two days later......

"The King is back! " You can hear the people cheering outside. He has returned from his long journey to the Lone Islands. Your heart jumps out of your skin as your eyes meet with his chestnut brown irises. You run into his arms embraces him tightly like you would never let him go away from you.

"Missed me, princess? " He asks you before kissing your lips. It is gentle yet needy. "I missed this for so long. "

You smile and run your fingers through his hair while resting your forehead against his. "Anything worth having is always worth the wait. "

He caresses your cheek with his thumb. "How lucky I am have someone that makes saying goodbye so hard. "

"One of your hugs would be perfect right now " You say mischievously booping his nose. You love his hugs so much. They are so warm and filled with love and comfort.

He wraps his arms around you and pulls you towards him, letting you rest your head on the crook of his neck. He smells like sea and salty wind. The moment you touch his hand he feels he is at home again.

Minutes later you let him go to his chamber to have a bath and rest. He looks so weary and tan. Despite that he wants you to be near him.

"Shall we go to the Astronomy Tower to watch stars, love? " He says starting to play with your hair locks again. It is almost nightfall. You can see Caspian is nervous than usual. He isn't much talkative with you that day. Instead he is playing with your hair or tracing patterns on your hand silently. He seems to be immersed in a deep thought.

"Is everything alright, Caspian? " You ask worriedly, noticing the anxious guise on his face.

"Yes, sure. " He uses his words carefully trying not to slip anymore words out of his mouth.

"Okay. Let's go to watch stars then " You stand up to leave. Both of you walk towards the tower without speaking much with the other.

Many constellations grace the night sky that day. Caspian watches you smiling as you looked at the stars. Your eyes are sparkling in the moonlight. Your hair locks are dancing in the wind. Above all your mesmerizing smile adorns your face........exactly like in the day he revealed his feelings for you. He stares at you for a while thinking how lucky he is to have you in his life that you mean the world to him.

"Sweetheart " He says lacing his fingers with yours. You know that tone. You look at him noticing that he seewants to say something important to you.  " You're so beautiful "

"You're a good looking young man too Cas. " You replies.

"Are you happy with me? I mean.... I just want to know " He stutters the words with a concerned look.

"By all means. Sometimes you can be a dork in the true sense of the term or an unexpected goofball? " You tease him. It makes him laugh.

"Oh really? Am I a dork? " He asks amusingly through the smile.

"You are, of course!"

"I'm afraid others don't think of me in that way. "

"Well, I do. I know your ways Caspian , as much as you're aware of my conduct " You both smile at each other, trying to control your laughter.

"It's because of the fact that I'm myself in your presence. " He whispers softly as he takes a step towards you.

"Before I met you I never knew what it was like to be able to look at someone and smile for no reason. " Caspian caresses your cheek. "The first time I met you it wasn't love at first sight. My love for you formed gradually. We became best friends. Your personality ,your voice, your hair, your eyes, your humour. The way you look away and smile when I lay my eyes on you. Gradually it all came clear to me, you are exactly what I was looking for. Sometimes you don't see the best thing that ever happened to you is right under your nose. "

You both look into each other's eyes. You feel tears building in your eye as he says  those words.

"You are beautiful deep down to your soul. You're so kind and gentle. I love how you try to make others happy even when you're sad. Everyday I wonder how lucky I am to have you in my life. " He goes on confessing what he had been bottling up inside his heart for so long.

"I hold myself blessed to have you in my life too, Cas " You whispers in his ear.

"I love your smiles and your perfect imperfections too. You deserve someone who loves you without every single beat of his heart, someone who thinks about you constantly, some who spends every minute of every day just wondering what you are doing ,where you are, who you are with, and if you are okay. You see, I love you and I don't want to lose you because my life has been better since the day I found you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. " He takes a velvet box out of his pocket and goes on one knee before you. Time seems to stand still for the two of you.

"So... Y/N, would you do me the honour of being my wife and my queen ? " You look astounded for a while, trying to muster up the right words. He is gazing into your eyes hopefully.

"I.. yes.. I would love to be your wife. " A large smile graces his face. He puts the ring on your finger and pulls you in for a kiss mingled with love, passion and mirth. You let him deepen the kiss as you wrap your arms around his neck. You both pull away from each other almost out of breath.

"I'm not the best but I promise I will love you with all my heart. " Your words makes him smile once again as he held you in his arms.

"It has always been you my love. It'll will always be you the only one I love " He places soft kiss on your lips again as the stars in the sky rests above both of you.

He loved you then. He loves you still. Always have. Always will.

#caspian x reader #ben barnes #king caspian x reader #ben barnes x reader #The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian #voyage of the dawn treader #narnia #Caspian X #Caspian #King Caspian #prince caspian #grammar mistakes

[theheartchoice]

a gift 

dean/cas  |  2k  |  coda for 12x23 

pining!castiel; long distance; emotional hurt/comfort 

Cas was with Kelly for weeks in that little house in the middle of nowhere. He was her Guardian, so he would not have left her alone, meaning he spent quite a lot of time in that place. 

They decorated Jack’s room and probably built a fire in the hearth and Cas may have even cooked for her. They would have read books and watched television and gone for nature walks around the lake. 

But Cas, being an Angel, wouldn’t have slept as Kelly did. So, at night, when mama and baby were dreaming of a better tomorrow, Cas would sit in that old armchair by the window with a view of the lake and the stars. 

And on that old Casio he found in one of the dusty rooms, he would listen to those thirteen songs. 

Thirteen. One for each year he had known Dean. 

He hadn’t realised it at the time, but when Dean handed back the tape and called it a gift, Cas would come to know just how real that sentiment was, and how special.

For once again, Cas found himself parted from his friends, his family, his almost-home. And while he believed in his new mission, he couldn’t help but wish things were a little different. 

Despite his company, he felt alone. Kelly was new to him and the child was yet to be born. They may both have trusted Cas and glimpsed the best of him, but it was his best friend who really knew him.

Dean knew the deepest and darkest of him, and cared about him, still. 

Cas knew he did. Because every night, as those thirteen melodies filled the air, he heard Dean’s voice filter through. He prayed to Cas to come home safe, pleaded that he see reason, see that it was dangerous to go it alone, and repeated what he said on their last day together: 

Don’t you get it by now?.. We’re better together, man.. We just are.

But this wasn’t Dean’s fight. It wasn’t his responsibility. It wasn’t his mission. So Cas kept away, kept Dean and Sam away to keep them safe, and keep the unborn child safe.

As the music rocked and rolled him through the evening, Cas’ thoughts drifted back to his many adventures with the Winchesters.. They had come so far, survived so much, and grown in ways he personally never expected. 

He felt the gift Dean had spoken of. The tape had become a comfort, and in that comfort Cas found understanding: there was a little bit of home in each and every song, a little bit of Dean. 

He was unsure whether his friend had intended it or not, but in the words sung and in the rise and fall of the refrain, Cas was reminded of their time together. 

Over the weeks, he paired each song with a particular stretch of road along their long journey through life and death. In the dark and quiet of the night, he would sit and remenisce over all the good times and the bad, recalling moments of learning, of emotion both painful and uplifting, of failings and savings, of intentions gone awry, of friendship and free will saving the day.

About a week into their stay, when they were in town fetching supplies, Kelly wandered into a pawn shop. Cas had ways of procuring funds which she was greatful for, though she took charge of what was needed, writing out everything to help them along. He took the list from her while she took a moment to seek out a special item. 

In the pawn shop she browsed the shelves of telescopes, binoculars, cameras and old electronics. She picked up an old Minolta, checking the basic bits to find it working well enough. Another item on a lower shelf caught the sun so it caught her eye, and she smiled at her good fortune. 

The man sold her a few stashed rolls of film, and she bundled it all away in her bag before heading on her way, meeting with Cas to drive back to their little house by the lake.

In the living room Kelly pulled out her camera and loaded up some film. Cas had ventured outside to gather more wood for the fire, and she found him by the water’s edge, all smiles. 

He was kneeling on the pebbled shore, cupping the lake in his hands before splashing it over his face, the golden sun glinting off the droplets like pure soul. 

She snapped a shot from behind, and from the side, the mountains and forest in the distance, the cool shade of the setting sun casting shadows. They were like phantoms, the spirits of mythic beings swaying around him, protecting him from any outside evil. 

The thought of not being there for her son lay heavy in Kelly’s heart, but she knew he wouldn’t be alone, and that he was in good hands. Moreover, she knew Cas wasn’t alone. There were those who cared about him, who would help him even if only from afar.

She joined him by the water, sun-warmed and beaming, filled up with hope and joy. Cas returned her smile, though softer, and she pulled him close and turned the camera on themselves. Cas blinked in confusion, and she giggled. 

“Sentiment,” she said simply.

At breakfast the next morning, Kelly produced a paper bag from under the table and slid it over to Cas. “Open it,” she smiled, trying to keep her excitement subdued. And he did so. 

Inside was an old walkman and a pair of headphones. She clasped her hands before her, practically bouncing with glee - a visual prayer. But Cas was less enthused.

“What.. is it?”

“It’s a Walkman!” His head twitched to the side as he inspected the item. “It’s for music. So you can take it with you, wherever you go.”

Cas looked up, comprehension lighting his eyes. “Thank you.”

Kelly smiled and ignored his lack of energy. “I know you’ve been listening to that tape - Zeppelin. And If you want to, with this, you can.. go for walks outside, or anywhere. It’s handy. The music travels with you.”

His smiled widened, eyes shimmering with unshed emotion reflecting his most sincere thanks. But it wasn’t just Cas who benefited from Kelly’s gift. 

Some days and nights, when the three of them were relaxing on the lounge or outside in the sunshine, Kelly would prompt Cas to place the earphones over her belly, and let the baby hear. 

One such instance they were on the back porch, the midday cool making Kelly shiver as the house fell in shadow. She hugged her cardigan closer, and Cas placed a blanket around her shoulders.

“I’ve been thinking about names,” she said to Cas. “I like.. Jack.”

“Jack,” Cas repeated, as if to test the sound.

“It was my grandfather’s name. Well, Jackson, but.. He was a good man. Taught me how to drive, how to fish..” her eyes drifted to the water, lapping at the shore. “And he didn’t even bust me when he caught me smoking, or with a fake I.D. He taught me that, every choice I make in life is my own. And that as much as I want to believe I’m doing the right thing, I have to take responsibility for the choices that don’t turn out so good. Gotta take your lumps with your sugar, Kel.” 

She smiled at the memory of her dear old grandad, and Cas smiled because she did. Though hers was shadowed in sadness, like the clouds looming overhead.

“Jack,” Cas repeated, this time like it was familiar.

Kelly’s hand paused over her belly. “I think he likes it.” She beamed at Cas, grabbing his hand to feel the kick - which came again, stronger, when she repeated her child’s name. 

They shared a moment of joy, and overhead the clouds began to part, letting the sun shine through to grace over their bodies.

That night, Cas listened once more to his tape through the old speakers. He left the Walkman on the coffee table and sat in his chair, gazing out at the stars. 

He was reminded of so much by the sight of them: the early days of his life, when the skies were always clear and bright. All the way up to the Angels falling, like meteors from the heavens. 

He thought on his choices - good intentions having started out so well, yet ended up so wrong, and bloody. If it weren’t for Dean, he might never have needed to make such choices. But he would make them all again.

Even with the bad, even with all of his mistakes and all that he had to make up for, if it meant not knowing Dean, not having him in his life, not growing and changing for the better because of him, not caring for him (and being cared for by him), Cas wouldn’t wish for things to be different. 

He wouldn’t refuse the charge of leading the force that laid seige to hell to rescue The Righteous Man. He would choose to do it all again, knowing what he knows now. For amidst all the pain and suffering, he has also known such profound joy and friendship, love and freedom. 

Knowing Dean, knowing Sam and all those he has been fortunate enough to consider a friend, has made Cas a better being.

Humanity had long been God’s gift which Castiel watched over and protected. He truly cared for them, believing they were worthy of life. And It was bearing witness to the existence of love that made all those ancient years not only bearable, but beautiful. 

In recent years though, Cas had come to know a more personal gift: a human family. Something he never thought he could have, and before whom he never thought he would want.

Cas hoped that one day soon he would see Dean again, and that he would be forgiven by the best man he had ever known. He didn’t want there to be no new memories between them, to be no more songs, no more road. 

During their time apart, whenever he found himself missing Dean a little too much that he began to doubt going it alone, he thought of the music. He thought of the small piece of plastic encasing those ribboned melodies - something so small that held so much significance.

More than the music and the memories, Cas thought of the meaning of a gift itself: to give something willingly, with care and purpose, and without need of payment.

Dean had gifted him a comfort, and shared with him some human-made magic. Not to mention, that the hand-written label stated the songs were Dean’s favorite - chosen specifically and shared with a friend in the hopes it would bring him joy, or insight, or any number of positive emotions when he was far from Dean’s company - far from home.

Cas was reminded of the times he rode in the Impala with the boys, and how even though he had wings, he chose not to fly. He came to appreciate the familiarity of it, and learn how unexpected places can feel like home. 

When Cas thought of what ‘home’ meant, what it might be to him, he thought of Dean, and Sam, the Impala and the Bunker, on the road, helping people, fighting for their own semblence of love and peace and freedom.. 

..It was all Earth-bound places and people. 

Cas thought of simply being together.

He hoped one day he could return to them, to his true home. 

Doubt did creep in, now and then, as to whether he really belonged with the Winchesters. But being part of their family felt more profoundly true than anything else - more true than being an Angel even, for the friends he had found in Humanity had been more of a family to him than his own kin ever were.

It was in these days of nature walks and photographs, of belly kicks and cheese toasties, of fire in the hearth and a painted rainbow beside a crib, of Led Zeppelin and fond memories, that Cas gained a deeper appreciation for Humanity, and how they truly were Chuck’s greatest gift to the world.

p.s. I like to think Dean found the tape in that little house, and rather than burn it he brought it home with them. And in his room in the bunker he put it away in a box - one filled with memories of friends and family lost to him. Along with photographs of his parents, there was a token for Charlie, Kevin, Bobby, Jo and Ellen.. They had lost more family than they had saved, and he dared not say aloud that Cas’ loss hurt the worst, cut the deepest.. too many feels to finish

#destiel ficlet #the mixtape #coda 12x23 #s12 codas #guardian angel #pining cas #hurt comfort #myficlets #gen #cas misses dean #music #photography #kelly #home

[smokeybrand]

Smokey brand Movie Reviews: Well, Sh*t, Diana

I’m not a fan of the DCEU. I think they make capeflicks the wrong way. Sure, i absolutely understand there is artistic merit in he creation process and i do love a different interpretation of a character but there are certain elements that absolutely have to hit in order to make your version of the character, true to the core character. Spider-Man is a geek, Iron Man is an arrogant asshole with a heart of gold, and cap is a roided out boy scout. Unless the character has some nebulous history, like Donna Troy or Captain Marvel, the blue print for creating the characters is right there. Someone needs to be in charge to make sure you follow the plan. someone needs to be the one to reel you in when you stray too far from what’s been established before you go from Batman to Rorschach I know it sounds like i don’t like DC but that’s not true. I love them. Not as much as Marvel but i still dig their stories. Mostly. Hell, The Dark Knight is one of my all-time favorite films. I’m not saying they need to be as good as that but at least give me recognizable version of the characters, especially when there are excellent adaptions like this out there for comparison. Just because you CALL your movie a Superman movie, doesn’t mean it IS a Superman movie, ya dig? With that in mind, here’s hat i thought of Wonder Woman 1984.

The Good

Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman hits it out of the ark. This is the best I've ever seen her act in her short career. Look, i know she’s been doing it for a while now, but it's be honest; Wonder Woman is literally the strongest role she’s had to date. The emotional complexity of Diana Prince is easily the most nuanced character Gadot has ever played to this point and it took a while for her to really nail that as a reality. WW84 really demonstrates how Gadot has finally found a happy medium between her acting ability and the strengths of the character. I was a little sus when she was cast originally but immediately got on board when it turned out that she as the best thing about BvS. Since then, shes continued to grow with the character and seeing the ultimate version of her interpretation was a joy to watch.

Chris Pine as Steve Trevor was Chris Pine. Look, he’s great at his job. Dude knows his range and he stays in that lane perfectly. This makes his characters kind of same-t, you’d be hard-pressed to tell me the difference between Trevor and his version of Kirk, but I'm not mad either way. It’s always a delight seeing he show up to steal a few scenes then disappearing before overstaying his welcome.

I legitimately love the chemistry between Gadot and Pine. They are great together onscreen and it really lends a bit of authenticity to their relationship in the film. The way Trevor returns is wonky as f*ck and I'll get into that in a minute, but it was good to see him up there with Diana, for sure.

Pedro Pascal as this version of Maxwell Lord was pretty okay. I generally enjoy Pascal’s work, specifically on The Mandalorian and GoT, and he executes here to that inspired degree. He does an able job being a different kind of foil to Diana’s different kind of hero and it all works. Even if this version of the character does not.

Kristen Wiig’s Barbara Minerva was delightful. Look, i love Wiig, man. She’s great in everything she’s in. There is a charisma to her that only the very best SNL alumni can claim to have and it makes it really difficult not to root for Wiig in her projects. I mean, i paid money to see her version of Ghostbusters! Legit disappointed with that nonsense but i went because i like Wiig and she was the star. I was not disappointed in her performance as Minerva. No, she was exceptional as that character. I was, however, put off by her version of Cheetah but I'll get to that, too...

This movie is gorgeous. I’m an Eighties baby so seeing that whole aesthetic is always fun. Takes me back to when i was young. Part of the reason i love Stranger Things is because of that nostalgia. WW84 doesn’t execute as thoroughly as that show in their Reagan era retro run, but it’s serviceable. Big hair, big shoulders, big colors; It’s all there and it’s fantastic.

The effects are a little hit or miss but, overall, they’re okay. Certain aspects of this film’s super abilities, that fantastical sh*t which makes this a capeflick, could have been visualized better but i get why they weren’t. Most of my gripes with this type of stuff are nitpicks and you get over them pretty quickly. Most, not all.

Patty Jenkins is getting more and more comfortable behind the camera in films like this. The action in WW84 is much more detailed, much better shot, than in it’s predecessor. Free from Snyder’s grimdark influence, we have a relatively bright, relatively light, take on Wondy akin to the old camp from the Seventies show and i kind of dig it. It’ a choice and i commend Jenkins for making it.

The score is great. I mean, it’s Hans Zimmer, man. When does he ever drop the ball on sh*t like this? His score is actually incredibly important to this flick. There’s not a lot of action in it, thing is almost a character study or morality parable dressed up as a capeflick, so you need that extra impact to get you over the expository hump. Simmer delivers this with a delicate and powerful companion soundtrack. One could make the argument that this score is the best thing about Wonder Woman 84. I’m not, but one could.

The Monkey's Paw effect was executed pretty well in this flick. I was surprised by the level of escalation and how it all kind of made sense. I'd say that the writing was great because of that but it really isn't, just this one aspect.

That Lynda Carter cameo, tho.

The Bad

I hate this plot so much, man. The overall narrative is goddamn convoluted and a little inept. The primary conflict seems incredibly forced and the absolute hurdles this thing had to do in order to shoehorn Trevor back into the story is f*cking disappointing. It’s effectively Heaven Can Wait with Amazons, magic wishes, furry nudity, and Eighties excess. This sounds like a dope ass anime but it’s not. It’s a wonky, uneven, adequate time spent with contrived nonsense.

This is easily some of the weakest dialogue I've ever heard in my life. I cannot stress enough that I absolutely understand this is a capeflick so I'm not expecting Shakespeare but at least give me something better than this.

I hate this version of Maxwell Lord. Look, in the book, this dude was evil Batman. He bested the entire Justice league, every last one of them, with his sheer brilliance and terrifying capability. He achieved absolute victory over DC’s heroes prompting Diana to literally break his neck to rob him of his triumph. It’s wild to see. She actually thinks about it. Wonder Woman pauses, contemplates her options, and them murders Lord in cold blood, in front of Superman, and just walks away from dude’s corpse! It was brutal and understand. Maxwell Lord was a f*cking problem and he was only going to get worse. WW84′s version is not a problem and could have been much, much, better.

Full-blown Cheetah is gross looking. The effects for her wholly CG body are f*cking terrible, man. Obviously, they frame this “fight” at night to hide all of that but it’s still really, really, bad. I understand that there’s a budget that you have to hit but, f*ck, you couldn’t give me Rebirth version of Cheetah with two hundred million dollars? Word? I shouldn’t be surprised about this, all of the DCEU CG villains look like sh*t, but how hard is it to execute Cheetah properly? The Mortal Kombat guys did it for a game but you can’t do it for a movie? Really?

This feels like a throwback capeflick and i have a real issue with that. Of course, i like the old versions of superhero movies. Donner’s Superman and Burton’s Batman will always mean a great deal to me but we are beyond that now. We have a better understanding of how to do this now. It’s a legitimate film genre with prestige pieces and everything. Why the f*ck are we looking back instead of forward with this movie? I imagine the cartoonish nature of this movie was a conscious choice by Jenkins but it definitely feels like a miscalculation on her part.

There are a great many plot holes and loose threads left unexplored. Why didn't Barbara lose her powers when Maxwell lost his? That convoy really didn't see them f*cking kids in the road? How and why did she go full Cheetah for that matter? Why does Steve look like himself to Diana when he doesn't even look like himself to himself? How the f*ck did Barbara just walk into the whole ass White House like that? While on the the subject of Barbara, what the f*ck was the cost of her wish? Was the the Cheetah thing? None of that was very clear. Will Stagg get out of prison for the tax fraud thing in the beginning? I get that I shouldn't b e analyzing this movie to the extent that I am but it's so loose with its own internal logic, I can't help it.

Two and a half hours is a real big ask, man. This flick did not need this run time. You could easily trim thirty to forty minutes off this thing and still have a really compelling watch. As it is, there's too much time for the pacing to get dumb and, boy, does it get dumb.

The Verdict

Wonder Woman 1984 isn’t a Wondy flick. It’s a generic superhero vehicle that happens to have Diana slotted in the pole position. You could have put any character and their main love interest in these roles and it would have worked out fine with little to no tweaking. This sequel feels uninspired in a lot of ways. It’s completely devoid of the emotional weight that first run carried. I can’t say it’s terrible, though, because i know what else is in the catalog to this point. WW84 is still one of the best in the DCEU and that says way more about the franchise than it does this flick. It’s not all bad, however. I did enjoy Gadot as Wondy. She’s come a long way and you can see just how comfortable she is as Diana. Chris Pine is going to Chris Pine. His Steve Trevor is, once again, the best thing about this movie. Rather, his and Gadot’s chemistry is the best thing about this movie. The newcomers are pretty okay as well.

I always enjoy Pedro Pascal and this version of Maxwell Lord ain’t terrible but it is way too different from the core character for me to really get on board Just write a different character, you know? Nothing on the page about this version of Lord, come anywhere near the violent mastermind from the books and i think that’s a very real missed opportunity. I was a little sus of the Kristen Wiig casting for Barbara Minerva but she pulled it off. I really enjoyed her as Cheetah literally until she actually be Cheetah. i was curious why the marketing refused to show her in full-blown Cheetara mode and, when i saw it, i understood. They should have let those effects cook a little longer. That’s the theme of this entire flick, though, wen i think about it; Sh*t should have cooked a little longer.

WW84 is a decent watch, if a little long in the tooth. It;s mad campy, saccharine sweet at points, and is definitely a capeflick envisioned through the eyes of a woman. It’s not bad, mind you, it’s just not that good, either. Everything seems almost but not quite. The villains are almost compelling but not quite. Diana’s entire arc in this seems almost cathartic but not quite. The necessity of Steve Trevor seems justified but not quite. This thing just misses the mark and yet, somehow, it’s still one of the best in the DCEU catalog. hat sh*t just boggles my mind, man. If you know your Amazonian lore like i do, this film can be frustrating at time. If you’re a fan of the DCEU, you’ll probably enjoy this flick. If you’re a fan of this version of the Wondy myths, then 84 is definitely for you. There is enough other stuff here to entertain and distract so it’s an okay time overall. The first one is still the best out of the lot, though.

[alwaysanotherooc]

heyyy, soo if you're still doing the angsty choices couples thing?? I would love to see some Dom/Jackson??? just cause I'm having a lot of tc&tf feels...

Honey. You and me BOTH dear GOD, I’m upset and happy and sad and…all the feelings! I’m so up for this particular pairing, I was hoping someone would request them! As usual, find it under the cut, this is gonna be LOOONG.Send me a Choices couple and I’ll answer angsty questions about them!

Do they have a lot of arguments? Nope, not at all. Dom and Jackson are both very easy going guys usually, so when they fight it’s like the whole of Stormholt is confused and scared by this turn of events. (Kenna’s really not fond of it at all.)

Who apologizes first, and in what way? They both come around at the same time, whenever Val and Kenna force them to come OUT WITH IT and apologize because they’re making everybody else in the castle uncomfortable with their fighting and it’s making Bubbles sad too. Later, Dom will push Jackson into their bed and whisper his apologies into Jackson’s skin.

Who has more insecurities? Jackson by far. Dom is...DOMINIC HUNTER, the Great Dragon of Stormholt, The Flame, he’s...he’s a legend, a hero, a myth wrapped in an enigma wrapped up inside a very handsome sandwich, and Jackson, in his own mind, is boring. (Dom feels some type a way about that kind of talk. Ask that guy over there who said something negative about Jackson when Dom was around and now that guy is bleeding and has peed his pants and is crying.) There’s also the fact that Jackson can’t get over his fear that he could lose this love of his life too, the way he did for his wife and son.

Who gets more riled up? Dom can be quick to anger when it comes to certain subjects, but someone insulting Kenna or each other is a HUGE touchy subject for them both. (Short answer: don’t do it ever, they will find you and one of them is a dragon.)

How do they hide their pain when they’re upset? Jackson throws himself into his work, training soldiers and sparring with them, he shuts down completely. Dom hangs incessantly around Kenna, refusing to talk about it but remaining in a foul mood. He pouts, basically.

Who tries to make up first? Kenna will eventually force them to apologize at the same time if it doesn’t seem to be getting better and the both of them just keep getting more and more miserable, but usually, they don’t have to resort to that. Dom will find Jackson at night after he’s done training and will apologize to him, eyes wide and soft, and Jackson will apologize too, and long story short they’re great at make-up sex.

Would they hate-fuck if they were mad at one another? Oh yeah. This is how they actually resolved a few of their arguments.

Do they hold grudges? Nope. Jackson forgives easily (he still remembers but he forgives), and Dom is a little slower to do so but he’s pretty quick to forgive as well.

Is there something big that could potentially tear them apart if it was revealed? I honestly don’t think so, no. They both know pretty much everything about one another.

If something already happened to tear them apart, what would make them come back together? A typical mutual life-saving situation. (Which is still pretty common in Stormholt, Kenna just attracts shit like that, no matter how peaceful the Five Kingdoms are now.) They’ll survive whatever attack came upon them, catch sight of each other, throw down their weapons and leap into each other’s arms.

What’s their favorite pastime when they’re upset? When they are fighting, Jackson will either spar with someone or go down to the tavern and drink for a bit, mulling over his problem; Dom will take to the skies, flying through the clouds and clearing his head. When they’re not fighting, they’ll either have sex to remind the other that they’re still there and always will be, or they simply go to their rooms, lay down on the bed with their arms around each other, and breathe for a while.

Who do they confide in when shit hits the fan (besides each other)? Dom always confides in Kenna, always, and Jackson has found surprising confidantes in Val and Raydan. 

Is it hard for them to talk about their feelings openly with each other? It is for Jackson, at first, he’s still hesitant to talk about what he’s feeling and what he’s afraid of, but once he gets comfortable with it, they’re that couple that never shuts up about how much they love each other, it’s super annoying. They’ll yell at each other across a battlefield, “You light up my world, you’re my sun and moon and stars!” “You are the fire of my breath and my loins!” “That one’s a bit dirty, love!” “That’s the idea, darling!”

Who grieves more when the other is away? Jackson. He knows Dom can handle himself, but he can’t help but think about what it would be like if something did happen and Jackson wasn’t there to stop it. Dom’s just as bad though, he’s seen it happen with Kenna, him not being there and shit happening, that he worries about Jackson a lot too.

Who misses the other more, or really thinks about them more? Again, it’s gotta be a tie. Jackson misses Dom like crazy when he’s not around, and being away from Jackson for prolonged periods of time makes Dom positively antsy.

Do either of them have a special item (an article of clothing, a necklace, a book) that they use when they miss the other? You mean their wedding gifts to each other?! Dom commissioned Whitlock to make a pendant for Jackson, with a depiction of a flame similar to the one on Dom’s chest on a chain long enough the pendant rests over Jackson’s heart, and Jackson wears it always. Jackson, meanwhile, went on a journey with Sei and found a very peculiar animal in the mountains that can only be described as a cross between a small dragon and a large dog. It breathes fire and is very well trained. Kenna’s bear and wolf pup love it. Dom cried when he saw it. He named it Leon.

Who cries more? Depends on what they’re crying about, but I think that they’re both pretty in touch with their emotions. Jackson wouldn’t like, cry in front of his soldiers but he would definitely cry if he felt like it.

Do either of them have the other’s stuff lying around their house? Dom loved seeing his things mixed in with Jackson’s and would just leave things in his rooms by the armload until finally, Jackson offered quietly, “It be simpler to just live together.” and Dom jumped at the chance.

Do they tease each other while in a fight (whether it be with themselves or just general teasing)? Constantly, absolutely constantly. Dom never stops flirting, even when they’re fighting, even when they’re trying to avoid capture or death, and Jackson lives for it. 

Do either of them have any vices? They both like to drink but I don’t know if I’d call it a vice...

What’s the thing they miss most about each other? Dom misses Jackson’s laughter, how his eyes crinkle up at the edges, how his hands feel in his. Jackson misses the sound of Dom’s voice, smooth and lilting and constantly teasing, the way Dom smiles at Jackson like he’s the best thing he’s ever seen in his life.

What’s their go-to breakup/angst song? I mean...lute music?? I don’t know.

Who’s more jealous? Jackson. He’s worried Dom will leave him for someone ‘better’ which infuriates Dom to no end.

Who is the first to forgive? Jackson and Dom are, you guessed it, tied again. But they’re both very quick to forgive anyway, so.

What’s the one deal breaker for either of them (lack of communication, fear of commitment, etc)? Jackson’s afraid of commitment at first, the ever present memory of his wife and son in his head, but it gets better the longer they’re together, until he can’t remember being scared at all.

Who would take longer to let go? Dom, but it’s mainly about the petty things. “You left your armor on the floor again and I STUBBED MY TOE, OW!”

Which is more afraid of confrontation? Neither one is afraid of confrontation, they’re both complete badasses. (They should come with a warning label: Do Not Mess With Under Any Circumstances)

Who’s the first to distance themselves (if either)? Jackson would be the first to suggest a little space, but unless the fight is really really really bad, they always end up in the same bed later.

Who’s more patient? Jackson can be very patient. Dom couldn’t be patient if his life depended on it.

Who’s the first to blame themselves? Sadly, my gut instinct is Jackson, but he’s still a very level headed person, and he only falsely blames himself about things some of the time.

Who’s more likely to do something out of spite? Dom. There’s an ongoing list at the castle of ‘Favorite Things Dom Has Said Or Done Out Of Spite’.

Who would be the first to say they hate the other? Neither one could even stomach the thought.

Who worries more? Jackson when it comes to absolutely everything, but if it’s about Kenna or Jackson, Dom wins by a landslide.

What scent reminds them of the other? Dom smells like campfire smoke and strong pine trees, Jackson smells like rain and honey colored beer.

Do they have any regrets (regarding the other, or just in general)? Jackson regrets taking so long to figure it out, but other than that, no. Neither one really has any regrets.

Who’s quicker to walk away if a situation gets heated? Jackson, he never wants to say something he doesn’t mean.

Who is more prone to anger? Depends on what they're angry about, but I feel like Dom.

Who cries more in an argument? In the worst of their fights, they’re both crying their hearts out.

Does it take a lot for it to get to the point of yelling? Oh yeah. They hardly ever fight, ever. It’s a very rare occurrence.

Who sleeps on the couch after an argument? They always end up sleeping in the same bed unless it’s the very worst of their fights, and if so, neither one can stand to sleep in their bed alone.

Who’s more likely to protect the other? Straight up the biggest tie ever, but barely eeking out in front is Dom.

If one of them gets injured, who worries more? Dom, because Jackson doesn’t have “dragon healing skills.” “Lowlander, that is not how this works-” “SEI MY BELOVED IS DYING LET ME BE.”

Who would be more afraid of the other’s death/harm? Jackson wakes up in cold sweats, has night terrors, and during one awful occasion with a psychic, lived out his fear of watching Dom die while he did nothing. Dom has awful nightmares about Jackson being the one who found him in the mountains and not Kenna, and crushing Jackson underfoot.

Who ends up yelling first? Dom’s voice would get louder and louder the longer they argued and Jackson’s would rise to match it.

Who would be more likely to save who? Tie, straight up tie.

Who stays up at night brooding? Jackson. Sometimes Dom can lure him to bed with a husky voice and beckoning fingertips. Sometimes he sits up with him.

Who has more dreams/nightmares about the other? Jackson has a lot of incoherent dreams, but all the ones that contain Dom are, for better or worse, perfectly clear. Dom doesn’t dream a whole lot, but when he does it’s either a platonic scene with them and all their friends or it’s a very X-Rated dream about Jackson that he wakes up to make come true.

Who comforts who after a bad dream/event? They both do whatever the other asks for after they have a bad turn. (Very supportive couple.)

Do they think about each other a lot? YES. LIKE, ALL THE TIME, BASICALLY.

If one of them were to come back after a long time, who would come to who? It could honestly be either one being sent off on a mission for or with Kenna, but when they reunite, it’s the sweetest thing ever.

This was so AMAZING. I loved every second of this, oh my god. THANK YOU KIND ANON FOR THIS GIFT OF LIFE.

#Anonymous #Dominic Hunter #WIll Jackson #Will Jackson/Dominic Hunter #choices: stories you play #choices: the crown and the flame #the crown and the flame #playchoices #playchoices the crown and the flame #emmawontshutup

[mermaidsirennikita]

July 2017 Book Roundup

In July, I read eight books--most of which were unfortunately mediocre to poor.  However, there were a couple of standouts, and one of them was fantastic.  My favorite book of the month was Riley Sager’s Final Girls, a thinky thriller that deconstructs the concept of a final girl, while at the same time embracing the best parts of slasher movies.  If you love Scream and I Know What You Did Last Summer, you have to try this book.  

So--below is the good and the (unfortunately, moreso) bad or fair to middling.

Dividing Eden by Joelle Charbonneau.  2/5.  After the assassination of the king and crown prince, the kingdom of Eden is left in turmoil.  The crown would go to the king’s widow, but after she goes mad, that’s not an option anymore.  That means that twins Andreus and Carys are left to battle each other for the throne--or else give up their family’s rights to the kingdom and endanger their own lives.  Aaaand that’s pretty much it.  There are romances thrown in, but the book moves incredibly slow for its length.  The assassinations--events that we know occur because that’s the plot--take forever to actually happen, and for that matter once it does happen it’s really fucking nothing.  It’s super predictable, the villain can be spotted from a mile away, and that makes Carys and Andreus seem super stupid.  Also, Andreus is cursed or something and Carys has a magical drug addiction.  The other issue I have with the book is that so much is made of how close the twins are--and a brother-sister twin relationship is such a cool topic to write about--but the fact is that they aren’t close.  If they were, they wouldn’t be ready to stab each other in the back at a moment’s notice.  Not the smartest book.

The Shark Club by Ann Kidd Taylor.  3/5.  As a young girl, Maeve was bitten by a shark.  The event sparked a lifelong passion for the creatures, and at thirty she’s returning home to her grandmother’s hotel as a successful shark researcher.  Recently, she’s sparked the beginnings of a romance with fellow researcher Nicholas--but back home, she runs into former fiance and childhood love Daniel, now the chef at the hotel and the single father of a young girl.  Maeve’s feelings for Daniel return as she bonds with his daughter, the situation further complicated by an illegal shark finning operation nearby.  This book is well-written, and while it didn’t thrill me in any way, it was pleasant.  It’s very much a “finding yourself” story, and I think that a lot of people would like it--you could call it a thinking beach read.  At the same time, however, I found certain plot points to be rather predictable.  But I appreciated the focus on sharks, animals that I love, and the ongoing threat of finning.  

One True Loves by Taylor Jenkins Reid.  3/5.  Emma married her high school sweetheart, Jesse, with whom she was madly in love.  The day before their first wedding anniversary, he went missing, and was presumed dead.  Three and a half years later, Emma is engaged to her new love, Sam, when she receives the news that Jesse has been found alive.  Now--who does she really want to be with?  I gave this three stars because I read it over the course of a day and it was certainly engaging, and Reid writes romance in a really lovely way and many people have and will love this.  But this was no Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo.  It actually kind of infuriated me.  It’s painfully obvious what Emma’s choice will be, the first half of the book breezes through each romance in a way that makes it difficult to get attached to either one, and the latter half is largely Emma dithering and treating each guy like shit.  The thing that irritated me most is that--well, look, I felt condescended to.  The old Emma loved to travel and see the world, and it’s implied that this was all a part of her youth and now she’s more mature and values the Real Things.  She’s Mature.  And I’m like, bitch you’re just kinda boring now.  There’s a scene where she’s basically like “I don’t like to fuck on kitchen counters anymore, I’m not in my twenties anymore I’m in my thirties”.  BITCH YOU ARE THIRTY-ONE HE HAS BEEN MISSING FOR 3.5 YEARS NOT TWENTY.  Like I respect her moving on and have no issue with that time frame, but Emma acted as if Jesse had been away for decades when he just hadn’t.  Sigh.

The Incarnations by Susan Barker.  4/5.  Beijing taxi driver Wang begins receiving mysterious letters from a stranger that claims to be connected to him through their past lives.  Detailing their different lives together, the stranger clearly also knows a lot about Wang’s current life, including his troubled marriage and his young daughter.  Desperate to find out who his “stalker” is, Wang becomes obsessed with the letters, and in the process confronts his own troubled past.  This is a dark fucking book, and it isn’t for the faint of heart because it honestly has a little bit of everything--to the point that I couldn’t give it a 5/5 because I did find some points a bit too disturbing.  Not in a gratuitous sense--it was the right choice for the book, just not always for me the reader.  But it is so well-written, and really original, and interesting in a way that so many reincarnation books aren’t.  It goes to some very interesting places, and was incredibly gripping.  For that matter, you get to see a number of different periods of Chinese history, which is always fun to read about.  Highly recommend if you’re looking for something really different.

Because You Love to Hate Me, edited by Ameriie.  3/5.  This anthology--featuring authors like Renee Ahdieh, Marissa Meyer, Susan Dennard, and more--focuses on villains.  Each story is actually a response from the author to a challenge given by a different writer; the challenger follows up the story with an essay, reacting to the story and discussing villainy.  Many of the stories are takes on classic villains--Moriarty from the Sherlock Holmes series, The Little Mermaid’s sea witch, the Erl-King/Queen--while a few others are completely original.  As with almost any anthology, this was a bit of a mixed bag.  A few of the stories were really excellent.  “Marigold” was the first thing I’d read from Samantha Shannon, and now I’d really like to see something else from her.  “Jack” was one of the few stories I found actively gruesome, and “Gwen and Art and Lance” was a pleasant, different surprise.  “Indigo and Shade” and “The Sea Witch” were also interesting.  However, a few of the stories weren’t for me just because of their style or content, and a few more seemed to fail at really being... well, about villains.  I felt like I was reading a bit too much about sympathetic villains, you know?  And the essays weren’t really for me--they felt like Tumblr posts.  But with that being said, it was enjoyable, and I think a lot of people would love it.

Final Girls by Riley Sager.  5/5.  At nineteen, Quincy Carpenter survived a massacre at Pine Cottage, during which all of her friends was killed.  As the only survivor, Quincy was immortalized by the press as one of the “Final Girls”, the other two being Lisa Milner and Samantha Boyd, who survived similar such massacres.  Ten years later, Quincy is shocked when Lisa commits suicide, and the mysterious Samantha shows up on her doorstep immediately after.  If you’re a fan of slasher movies, I highly recommend this book, which not only deconstructs the “final girl” archetype but tells a hell of a story.  It shifts between the present and what happened to Quincy on the night she survived, and both stories are equally compelling.  Quincy is a remarkably complex and flawed character, as is Sam--I was enthralled by both.  While I had an inkling about one of the twists, I certainly didn’t predict all of them.  It’s not only a great story, but an important one--while few of us experience traumas as horrible as Quincy’s (thankfully) the way she dealt with hers was very familiar to me, and the Sager does an excellent job of examining the difference between being fine on the surface and being fine in reality.  A must-read.

Every Last Lie by Mary Kubica.  2/5.  Clara, mother to a four-year-old daughter and a newborn boy, has her world shattered when her husband is killed in a car wreck.  What is written off as a tragic accident becomes more complicated when their daughter, Maisie--who was in the car with Nick when he died--insists that her father was being chased by a “bad man”.  Becoming obsessed with what happened to Nick, Clara begins to trace the last few months of her husband’s life--while, in alternating chapters, we see the truth unveiled from Nick’s perspective.  I gave this book two stars instead of one because I do think it portrays grief well--Clara is irrational to the point where she becomes unhinged and obsessive, and this does ring true to me, especially since she’s probably suffering from postpartum depression as well.  But the ending.  UGH.  THE FUCKING ENDING.  It ruined the book for me, as did the fact that we were clearly supposed to sympathize with Nick when he was a complete dirtbag.  Spoiler alert: Nick wasn’t cheating on Clara like you might initially think (he keeps going on and on about her pregnant body, and I was like wait are you into this or are you resentful of it idek) but he was keeping a million things from her.  An ex-girlfriend showing up in his life again, a kid that was possibly fathered by Nick before he met Clara, a malpractice suit, the fact that he’s apparently the worst dentist on Earth and deserved the malpractice suit...  God.  I should have known that I would hate Nick as soon as I realized he was a dentist.  Clara isn’t much better.  She idolizes Nick, jumps from one conclusion to the other over the course of a couple pages, and honestly doesn’t seem to have any kind of life outside her husband and kids.  Drop this, read Final Girls.

Close to Shore by Michael Capuzzo.  3/5.  In 1916, the Jersey Shore experienced a series of shark attacks that would really be the first attacks in American history to capture the public’s imagination.  They remain pretty distinct, as they occurred in a short period (from July 1 to July 12) across both the ocean and a nearby creek, and four people were killed and one injured by what seemed to be a single shark.  I read this in honor of Shark Week and because I’ve always been seriously fascinated by these attacks, ever since I was very young.  Capuzzo does a good job of describing the shark’s potential life and the attacks themselves.  But he also spent a lot of time fleshing out the lives of people who often weren’t even the attack victims themselves but their loved ones, which like.. fine, I’m sure that worked for a lot of people, but I’m here for the attacks.  I also feel like more time should have been spent on discussing theories regarding shark behaviors and what made these attacks so unique--and were they really unique at all?  Capuzzo seemed to be very set on the idea that this was a juvenile great white, that it was attacking for these reasons, etc.  And not all scientists, at least from what I’ve read, agree with him--even a discussion of outlying, unlikely theories would have been nice.  Capuzzo also didn’t seem to explain why he was so set on the great white theory, when a bull shark would be another likely candidate--some would say more likely than a great white, especially during the creek attacks.  With that being said, if you’re interested in the topic it’s a quick read and nicely informative.  To paraphrase Jon Snow, I like the shark bits.

#books #book recs #book recommendations #book roundup

[quotespicture]

https://quoteswithpicture.com/70-famous-movie-quotes-from-your-favorite-characters-2019/

70 Famous Movie Quotes From Your Favorite Characters (2019)

Our latest collection of famous movie quotes to help you see life through different perspectives.

Watching movies has many benefits. Movies provoke all kinds of emotions. Watching films can be a thrilling experience that makes you cry, smile, relax, and even help you become aware of your fears.

Besides the entertainment value they bring, movies also help create awareness about various issues in society such as religious animosities and political intolerance.

Moreover, movies can be a great educational resource for students. They’re great for visual learners and they allow students to see life through different perspectives.

After searching the web here are some of the famous movie quotes we could find! We hope you’re inspired, motivated and entertained! Enjoy!

Famous movie quotes from your favorite characters

1.) “Some people can’t believe in themselves until someone else believes in them first.” – Sean Maguire, Good Will Hunting

2.) “It’s only after we’ve lost everything that we’re free to do anything.” – Fight Club, Tyler Durden

3.) It is not our abilities that show what we truly are… it is our choices. – Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

4.) “Why are you trying so hard to fit in when you were born to stand out? –  Movie “What a girl wants”

  5.) “Oh yes, the past can hurt. But you can either run from it, or learn from it.” – Rafiki, from The Lion King

6.) “I love you. I am who I am because of you. You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I’ve ever had, and no matter what happens to us in the future, everyday we are together is the greatest day of my life. I will always be yours. – The Notebook

7.) “The truth is… I gave my heart away a long time ago, my whole heart… and I never really got it back. – Reese Witherspoon, Sweet Home Alabama

8.) “The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. And that’s what you’ve given me. That’s what I’d hoped to give you forever. – Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

9.) “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return. – From Moulin Rouge”

10.) “Do, or do not. There is no “”try””. – Yoda

Famous movie quotes that will get you fired up

11.) “I’m scared of everything. I’m scared of what I saw. I’m scared of what I did, of who I am…. and most of all, I’m scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole life the way I feel when I’m with you.” – “Baby” in Dirty Dancing”

12.) “Sometimes I wish I had never met you. Because then I could go to sleep at night not knowing there was someone like you out there. – Good Will Hunting

13.) “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. – Ferris, from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

14.) “Remember those posters that said, “Today is the first day of the rest of your life”? Well, that’s true of every day but one…the day you die.” – American Beauty

15.) “You’re nothing to me until you’re everything.” – “American Hustle

16.) “Every man dies, not every man really lives.” – Braveheart

17.) “The truth is a matter of circumstances, it’s not all things to all people all the time.” – Captain America: The Winter Soldier

18.) “I believe whatever doesn’t kill you, simply makes you…stranger.” – The Dark Knight, The Joker

19.) “When you decide to be something, you can be it.” – Frank Costello, The Departed

20.) “Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. But if you give him a mask, he will tell you the truth.” – The Fifth Estate, Julian Assange

Famous movie quotes that will brighten your day

21.) “Ideals are peaceful. History is violent.” – Don Collier, Fury

22.) “When I despair, I remember that all through history the way of truth and love has always won. There have been tyrants and murderers, and for a time, they can seem invincible, but in the end, they always fall. Think of it, always.” – Gandhi,  Gandhi (1982)

23.) “All those moments will be lost in time… like tears in rain.” – Rutger Hauer, Blade Runner

24.) “A boy’s best friend is his mother.” Anthony Perkins, Psycho

25.) ““Carpe diem. Seize the day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary.” – Robin Williams, Dead Poets Society

26.) “Get busy living, or get busy dying.”  – Andy Dufresne, The Shawshank Redemption

27.) “Hope. It is the only thing stronger than fear. A little hope is effective. A lot of hope is dangerous. A spark is fine, as long as it’s contained.” – President Snow, The Hunger Games

28.) “If you figure a way to live without serving a master, any master, then let the rest of us know, will you? For you’d be the first person in the history of the world.” – Philip Seymour Hoffman, The Master

29.) “Nobody’s perfect.” – Some Like It Hot

Famous movie quotes to help you see life through different perspectives

30.) “Now you’re looking for the secret, but you won’t find it, because of course you’re not really looking. You don’t really want to know. You want to be fooled.” – The Prestige

31.) “To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!” – A Fish Called Wanda

32.) “We all want to help one another. Human beings are like that. We want to live by each other’s happiness, not by each other’s misery.” –  Charlie Chaplin, The Great Dictator 

33.) “There’s no place like home.”  The Wizard of Oz

34.) “They may take our lives, but they will never take… our FREEDOM!” – Braveheart

35.) Do, or do not. There is no “try”. – Yoda, Star Wars

36.) Love cannot be found where it doesn’t exist, nor can it be hidden where it truly does. – David Schwimmer, Kissing a Fool

37.) Don’t let anyone ever make you feel like you don’t deserve what you want. – Heath Ledger, 10 Things I Hate About You

Famous movie quotes to entertain and educate

38.) I don’t regret the things I’ve done, but those I did not do. – Empire Records

39.) My momma always said, “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get.” – Forrest Gump

40.) Don’t ever let somebody tell you you can’t do something, not even me. Alright? You dream, you gotta protect it. People can’t do something themselves, they wanna tell you you can’t do it. If you want something, go get it. Period. – Chris Gardner, The Pursuit of Happyness

41.) To see the world, things dangerous to come to, to see behind walls, to draw closer, to find each other and to feel. That is the purpose of life.” – The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

42.) “All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.” – Gandalf, Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

43.) “Great men are not born great, they grow great.” – Mario Puzo, The Godfather

Famous movie quotes to help you reach your full potential

44.) “Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. What do we do? We swim, swim.” – Dory, Finding Nemo

45.) “What we do in life echoes in eternity.” – Maximus, Gladiator

46.) “Every man dies, but not every man really lives.” – William Wallace, Braveheart

47.) “I know what I have to do now. I’ve got to keep breathing because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?” – Cast Away

48.) “”Nobody is gonna hit as hard as life, but it ain’t how hard you can hit. It’s how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. It’s how much you can take, and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done.” – Rocky, Rocky Balboa

Famous movie quotes from award winning films

49.) “You drilled a hole in the dentist?!” – Denise, Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

50.) “If you were not so stubborn you would make a great queen.” “I would make a great queen because I am stubborn…if that is what I wanted.”—from an exchange between T’Challa and Nakia, Black Panther

51.) “Being human is a condition which requires an anesthetic.” – Freddie Mercury, Bohemian Rhapsody

52.) “Dying for the right cause. It’s the most human thing we can do.” — Freysa, Blade Runner 2049

53.) “Fire. It is a reflection of our own mortality.” – Dean Armitage, Get Out

54.) “When will the lesson be learned! You cannot reason with a tiger when your head is in its mouth!” – Winston Churchill, Darkest Hour

55.) “We Shall Never Surrender.” – Soldier, Dunkirk

56.) “All the courage in the world cannot alter fact.” — Niander Wallace, Blade Runner 2049

57.) “How many times do I have to teach you: just because something works doesn’t mean it can’t be improved.”—Shuri, Black Panther

58.) “So if I’m not black enough and if I’m not white enough, then tell me, Tony, what am I!?” – Don Shirley, Green Book

59.) “Favor is a breeze that shifts direction all the time.” – Harley, The Favourite

60.) “That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.” – Neil Armstrong, First Man

More quotes from famous actors and actresses

61.) “Show me the money!” – Jerry Maguire

62.) “The only failure is not to try”  – George Clooney

63.) “Don’t be afraid to fail. It’s not the end of the world and in many ways it’s the first step toward learning something better and getting better at it” –Jon Hamm

64.) “After many years of self-flagellation, I’ve realized that beating myself up doesn’t get me anywhere”  – Chris Pine

65.) “Your regrets aren’t what you did, but what you didn’t do. So I take every opportunity”  – Cameron Diaz

66.) “I’ve come across many actors like me who didn’t have a backup. That drive & will made it work”  – Clive Owen

67.) “I say luck is when an opportunity comes along and you’re prepared for it”  – Denzel Washington

68.) “The best way to guarantee a loss is to quit”  – Morgan Freeman

69.) “I’m a big believer in ‘never say never’ ”  – Jim Parsons

70.) “Be so good they can’t ignore you” ~ Steve Martin

What were your favorite movie quotes?

Most of us watch films for enjoyment, but movies also have great health and educational value. You’ll find most films to be not only entertaining but also educative regardless of your social status.

Everyone has a favorite movie line. Hopefully, the above quotes will make your day better and motivate you to reach your full potential.

Did you enjoy these movie quotes? Which famous movie quote resonated with you best? Tell us in the comment section below. We would love to hear all about it.

#2019 #70 #Characters #Famous #Favorite #Movie #movie quotes #Quotes

[overthinkingfeathers]

I was tagged by @deviantdragons to do what I’m mentally referring to as the 11/11/11 challenge - answer 11 questions, write 11 new ones for the next set, and tag 11 people. 

1. is there any piece of media that’s greatly influenced you? if so, what is it? There’s probably multiple pieces that have. Far too much Forensic Files as a young child (and no, I don’t know why I was watching that as a kid) inspired a long love of actual forensic science and that (plus study and other sources) made me an absolute joy to be around at parties. 

Also, there was a book I read as a kid that’s name and general plot I can’t recall, but the magic system stuck with me. Basically, magic through music (I seem to recall it primarily involving singing) with physical side effects if overused. I don’t know why that became my default magic system, but it did. Also, they made a bridge out of blood. 

2. do you like those visual stim videos (slime, floam, paint mixing, etc)? which is your favorite? I do not, honestly. Sometimes they’re fine, but I occasionally have a visceral no! reaction to some. Though I did watch a jar of glitter being swirled around for a while, so I guess that’s my favorite. 

3. what’s your favorite fic genre/tropes (h/c, angst, found family, etc)?  Ok, I know I just said that AUs aren’t my genre of choice, but I do rather enjoy first meet AUs (where the universe itself it the same, just the way they meet is different). Also mutual pining with eventual realization that it’s mutual is always good. 

4. how would you describe your Aesthetic™? Random and all over the place. I like sparkly things though, and that’s the only one that’s frequently been commented on (to the point that an ex called me Magpie because, well, I collect shiny things), so I guess that wins. 

5. practicality aside, what animal would you most want as a pet?  Practicality aside, I would have a veritable ark. But if I could only pick one... a horse. I was very much a horse girl, and I still love them. 

6. what’s your favorite month of the year?  Given that my moods are unpredictable, I don’t think I have a consistent favorite. May is pretty nice though. Generally decent weather (usually not too hot or cold, not too rainy) and given the ridiculous amount of birthdays of loved ones in that month, I usually take a week off from work to travel somewhere with someone. 

7. before tumblr, what website did you frequent most? WellGames had a match 3 game called Fitz that I wasted a lot of time on. It was my fall back time waster. 

8. favorite beverage?  Cherry Vanilla Coke. Which I’m not actually supposed to drink, buuuuut here we are. 

9. do you have any favorite items? I have a blanket and bear from childhood (well, infancy for the blanket - my parents took me home in it), and I recognize that these are supposed to be things you outgrow, but cold dead hands and all. I also have a book of my (late, never met) Grandfather’s poetry with a sweet note from my (late, never met) Grandmother and some of my (other, late, loved) Grandmother’s jewelry. I like personal connection heirlooms. 

Practicality wise, I love the cat tower, because the hellbeasts will actually sleep in it and scratch it rather than sleep in/scratch doorways and middle stairs. 

10. if you could Be anything, what would you be? Profession wise? I like my current job, though it’d be awesome if it were for a better company with better benefits. 

11. if you could live anywhere (including fiction & outside of earth) where would you want to live? There are considerations to be made here. How is their medical situation, or is it assumed I’m perfectly healthy? Because listen, I’m pretty attached to my chemically produced serotonin. Also my eyesight is truly atrocious without correction. These things are important. And are we assuming I have my current skills, or do I automatically get relevant ones upon transfer? What about money? I realize this is far more thought than you wanted, but this all makes a difference, and I just can’t commit without knowing. 

As for my 11 questions: 

-What undignified nicknames do you call your pets? If you don’t have pets, what undignified nicknames do you imagine you would use? 

-Which Dragon Age game is your favorite? (I assume if you’re following me, you have an opinion on this.) 

-Can you see the stars from where you are? Do you miss their soft, scattered light when they’re gone? 

-Which would you wear against your flesh like a token of affection from the heavens? Which would you give to the raven on the corner gutter? 

-They say you replace your cells every few years. How many yous have come and gone since the last sat beneath a tree? 

-Do you crack your knuckles by doing that fingers laced outwards stretch? If yes, aren’t you worried you’ll break your fingers? Please help me understand. It seems dangerous. 

-What wildlife do you see most often where you live? Do you love them? 

-Do you remember your dreams often? In color or black and white? Relatively normal or completely fantastical? 

-How many tabs do you currently have open on whatever internet browser you use? 

-How many skies have you seen? 

-How many WIPs do you currently have? 

As for the 11 unsuspecting souls I’m supposed to tag: @deviantdragons (since apparently circles are acceptable), @mikkeneko, @carabas, @fauxfires, @fledgling-witch, @livelychatterinthedistance, @halpahali, @legoprime, @lovelylittlekitten, @magneticmage, annnnd @barbex. Y’all have made the mistake of being a mutual and/or memorable in my notes recently. No pressure though, of course. 

#Not games #Feathers overthinks #Tag game #Unreality #Long post #Um #Blood cw #Kinda sorta #for that blood bridge #Also I know you don't actually change cells every 7 years pls don't @ me for that