for real! (from kadji amin)
[Image description: Screenshot of text:
What I've realized is that I believe that the matter of gender is practical and relational. It's not about who you are inside, it's more about how you would feel most comfortable in the world. It's not 'Who are you?' but 'How do you want to live?'
Had that been the discourse when I was coming up, I would have breathed a sigh of relief. I don't have to figure out who I am on the inside, I just have to figure out how I want to live.
end of ID]
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I love trans people whose transness means that their sexuality is complex. I love trans people who adopt contradictory labels. I love transmasculine people who still have ties to old lesbian spaces and transfeminine people who still have ties to gay spaces (even if they themselves aren't lesbian or gay). I love trans people whose dysphoria has put them at a place where they don't want to engage with any type of sexuality. I love trans people who are confused, unsure, or questioning. I love trans people who toe the lines of queerness. I love trans people who are unapologetically embracing their sexualities. I love trans people who are working through internalized shame about their sexualities.
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Me: I'm so glad i finally figured out my identity! it took a while, but i can finally say with confidence that i am aroace
my gender: ...
me: don't even FUCKING think about it
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hi this is a permission slip to be whatever identity you want. you wanna be trans but you think you’re not because [REDACTED]? i give you permission. you want to be a woman but you’re not allowed because [ELDRITCH SCREAM]? you’re exempted. permission slip. you might be bisexual if it wasn’t for [404 GENDER NOT FOUND]? i am currently stamping the gay card. point is nobody makes the rules for your gender and sexuality except yourself and if there’s something you want to be then you might just be that thing. and if you try it out and turns out your not? poof!! reverse permission slip. you can go back.
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I hate it when people make posts or whatever like ‘ugh 🙄 I can’t believe I’m a MAN 🤢🤮 I grew up thinking I was woman and women are so great and pretty and I’m just a gross stinky man ew’ like ok. speak for yourself I love being a man it fucking rules. trans masculinity is awesome. you sound like you need to sort those feelings out for yourself dude.
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i'm kind of new to the whole misgendering gerard stuff with girlgerard but i have seen thekidsfromyestergay 's posts constatly she/her-ing gerard but they say it's a joke. i don't know if it is funny to me or not... is that like normal? again i'm new to mcrblr
Several big mcr blogs on here she/her Gerard constantly, so it's become super normalized. But these blogs seem to always have a whole list of excuses including that its a joke, the gay she, and that Gerard is a actually a trans woman and to not use she/her is actually sooooo transphobic. In any case it's weird to constantly use the wrong pronouns for someone, or to label them in a way they don't want. (For reference Gee said on twitter his prns are he/they, and that's what Marina Toybina uses for him as well. Gee also said they don't use labels. They choose not to.)
Idc about an offhand girl joke or comment, but when thats all you use, or the thing you use the most its a problem. Jokes are meant to be funny, i don't see how addressing someone with pronouns that aren't theirs just because they dress more feminine is a joke or funny.
People deserve to have their name, pronouns, gender or lack thereof, all that, respected. None of us are Gerard or anyone else, therefore we can't know how they feel on things unless we're directly told. We only know what he has said, and to ignore that in favor of how we or any random person on the internet sees him is disrespectful to Gerard Way as a human being.
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Me drawing my main oc naked: I think I have an idea what my ideal gender transition would be
Or
Me drawing my main oc naked: OOPS THAT'S THE ME I WANNA BE
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How did you know you were gay?
ah, couple reasons i guess. some that only became obvious with like 15 years of hindsight, and only after pulling myself out of the deep dark pit of compulsory heterosexuality.
like. classic symptoms of lesbianism include shamefully staring at the floor when you pass the women's underwear racks in the department store, even though you're not quite sure why you're uncomfortable. that sort of thing.
i have memories from early elementary school of accidentally glimpsing down a girl's shirt at recess and then bottling up that feeling and refusing to think about it. any time i had a crush on a boy, it was from an extremely idealized and safely non-actionable distance. the one time i did have a boyfriend, it was just my guy best friend from middle school, we dated for barely a school year before i ended it and the most physical intimacy i was ever comfortable with was holding his hand when we walked to class. i went to a different school's prom because a guy i was kind-of friends with asked me, and spent the whole night uncomfortably avoiding eye contact.
basically i started questioning my sexuality towards the end of high school, when i noticed myself getting like. jealous about my guy best friend's girlfriends?? like. i wanted to date them. i wanted to steal them from him lmao. i thought girls were pretty and soft and nice and cute and i was too afraid of being a predatory creep to do anything about it besides have far-fetched daydreams, but there was no heterosexual explanation. like, i hugged a girl i thought was pretty one time and it did things to my brain. that memory got locked in for life.
i identified as ace/pan early on, but again- compulsory heterosexuality. the idea of being with a guy romantically or sexually was never actually appealing. i had just been told that was what i was supposed to want my entire life, and the movies do a great job of selling that fantasy. but really i was just a lonely depressed helpless romantic teenager that wanted to be loved lol.
a large part of why i identified as asexual was because i was so sex-repulsed by the idea of penetration, honestly? (which i have since gotten over, but specifically Only with girls. the idea of having sex with a man still icks me out, and my preference is definitely femme-presenting ppl) a bit of it was probably also because i hadn't unpacked gender yet either. it made it very difficult to actually imagine myself having sex with anyone ever lol. this is gonna sound so cringe to say, but reading gay smut did awaken things in me.
in conclusion, tldr, i just like to think about tits and kissing women sometimes, idk. thanks for coming to my tedtalk.
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