#i feel like i could make a canonically-supported argument about that

[axiina]

PLSSS soft corio comforting reader after they get he saves her(or them idm) from the arena after she tried to say a proper goodbye to her tribute (kinda like sejanus) but maybe she gets hurt and super traumatized but hes there for her idk

If I Killed Someone for You

Pairing: Coriolanus Snow x capitol!reader (gender neutral)

Summary: It wasn't supposed to end this way. You just wanted to say goodbye to your tribute, Lamina. Luckily, your boyfriend was there and made sure you didn't get hurt. Just why do you look at him differently now?

Words: 1.5k

Themes: hurt with comfort, a bit of fluff but also angst

Warnings: slight spoilers to movie and book, small changes to canon, Pup isn't Lamina's mentor, character's death, murder, a bit of trauma, blood, comforting, a bit of argument, death, overthinking, reader feels guilty about situation, referring reader as 'you'

Author's note: Lamina deserved better so you are her mentor, fuck this idiot Pup.

It was supposed to be fluff, but it came out a bit sad and traumatic. We got a soft Coriolanus, leaving aside the fact that he killed someone in the process. Enjoy!!

It was a pure act of desperation.

You just wanted to tell Lamina what you hadn't managed to do before. You had grown close to the young girl, who was horrified by what was happening. The very fact that she was in the arena, alone, without any support was driving you crazy.

She didn't deserve what happened to her. You hoped that maybe Lamina would be able to win and would be able to return home to the family she missed so much.

With each hour of the Hunger Games, her chances seemed to get smaller and smaller. For those few days, you sat like you were on pins and needles staring at the big screen at the Academy. After a while, the helplessness returned and you had to try not to cry in front of the cameras.

Lamina did not deserve it. None of the tributes deserved it. You did everything you could to make Lamina feel as comfortable as possible during the meetings and her stay at the Capitol. In the arena, you tried your best to make sure she wasn't hungry or thirsty. You didn't want her to get hurt. That, however, was not enough. Seeing a boy from her district, Treetch, joining another group made you feel anxious.

"What if they kill her? What if he betrays her…" This thought ran through your head repeatedly like a mantra.

She became weaker and weaker every day.

Your last meeting was too short. You didn't have time to say goodbye to her properly. You wanted her to know that even though you were physically somewhere else, your heart and thoughts were with her, at the arena. You had to say goodbye to her. You wouldn't forgive yourself if Lamina died without hearing a proper goodbye.

That's why you decided to see her one last time. Under cover of darkness, you crept into the arena in disguise and quietly snuck under the beam where Lamina was. Perhaps foolish and reckless, but you didn't think about the consequences. Ever since the girl got to the arena you couldn't find a place. You slept only short naps and didn't even want to meet Coriolanus, who was getting more and more worried about you.

While you were at the arena, every now and then you looked nervously around to the sides to see if anyone was coming. Lamina was surprised when you showed up. It was all surreal and you felt as if you were detached from reality. As soon as you saw Lamina you started crying. You both cried. Now the knowledge of how dangerous the arena was came to you like a powerful punch. She can't die. You don't remember what exactly you told her. You don't know if you said anything that made sense to her at all. The adrenaline made your mind kind of foggy. However, you know that it lifted her spirits. She knew you were with her and supporting her. You don't know exactly how much you were in the arena.

Everything happened so fast when Coriolanus grabbed your arm. Your brain didn't even register the fact that the boy appeared there practically out of nowhere. He looked terrified. He spoke quickly and incoherently. You only understood as he begged you to run away from there, because at any moment someone might come out of the tunnels and kill you. You were frozen with panic when it came to you. They hate the Capitol. They hate you too, and they certainly wouldn't think twice before killing you. Your fear was increased when Lamina's eyes widened in horror and only one word came out of her mouth.

Run.

Tributes began to leave the tunnels. As soon as they noticed that there were two mentors in the arena they started running towards you. Because of the adrenaline in your veins, you don't remember much of what happened next. You and Coriolanus ran as fast as you could when Coral, Mizzen, Tanner and Bobbin chased you while holding objects in their hands that could be the cause of your upcoming death.

The next scene that stuck in your mind was when your boyfriend hit one of the tributes on the head with a wooden plank. The boy fell down, and Coriolanus, without thinking much, hit him a second time. Then another and another. You looked at the body of Bobbin lying lifeless and Snow standing over him, unable to get a single word out. Your heart was raging and your head was spinning, feeling fear. You were terrified.

You couldn't tell what was the reason. The fact that you had just nearly died in the arena, or…. no, it couldn't have been that. He was merely trying to defend you. Yes, that was definitely the reason. Coriolanus is not a murderer, he was just…. he was terrified and acted emotionally. Bobbin would have killed him if Coryo hadn't done it first. Then you would have been next in line. Yes, that's what would have happened.

Both of you were injured, but at that moment it didn't even cross your mind to ask him how he was feeling. The Peace Keepers almost carried you out of there. Your parents were as terrified as you were. By the time you were sitting in your room wrapped in a blanket as your mother hugged you crying something finally hit you. You could have died. Your family would have been devastated. Your friends and…Coriolanus. Well, exactly, Coriolanus. He almost died because of your fault. Your stupidity and recklessness. Now he is injured and probably suffering, and you are not there with him. After what happened you didn't even say a stupid thank you to him.

"What were you even thinking! You could have died there! Did you even think about your loved ones? About me? What would have happened to me if you had died there? If I didn't get there in time!" Coriolanus repeated walking in circles around the empty classroom, the next morning. You had your head bent down, and tears were running down your cheeks. How could you do something like that?

Coriolanus sighed and sat down next to you, wrapping his arms around your body, pulling you closer.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't yell like that. You're probably still terrified. I was just…scared. I was scared that I would lose you."

It seemed to you that his voice cracked as the boy pressed his cheek against your head.

"Don't do that again. Don't scare me like that. If you had died I wouldn't have forgiven myself. I wouldn't be able to live normally." He whispered in your ear with a trembling voice.

"I'm here, love. I will always be until you have had enough of me. Although, most likely, even then I won't give you a break." A quiet, slightly trembling chuckle left his lips, at which you also smiled involuntarily.

"Enough of you? Never." you replied in an amused voice gently pulling away, but still remaining in his embrace. "I'm sorry, Coryo…I'm so terribly sorry for you. I just wanted to say goodbye to Lamina. I don't want anything bad to happen to her. I don't want her-"

"Shhh, it's okay." Coriolanus rested his forehead against yours and took your face in his hands gently stroking your cheeks. "It is past. The most important thing is that we came out of it alive. Lamina is also alive and relatively well, excluding the circumstances."

"Thank you, Coryo. Thank you for everything. For saving me that night and that you do not resent me for it." You whispered, trying not to cry. You nuzzled your cheek into his palm and placed a gentle kiss on it.

Coriolanus' face moved closer to yours and he gently brushed your lips with his own as if he was afraid he would frighten you.

"I am angry at you. Earlier even furious, but I love you too much to stay mad at you." Coryo gently rubbed his nose against yours and looked into your eyes.

His beautiful blue eyes. Cold, but at the same time it makes you feel at home. Eyes that yesterday were raging and at one point…full of hatred.

Your smile slowly disappeared as you remembered what happened to Bobbin.

"Do you want to talk about what happened yesterday-" you started uncertainly, but Coriolanus cut you off.

"No." His voice seemed cold and in a moment you were embarrassed and your heart beat faster. You were the reason he had to do it, and now you're reminding him of it. Maybe he thinks you are blaming it on him.

Your thoughts, however, were interrupted by your boyfriend's voice. Softer this time.

"I didn't mean to. I didn't want to do it, but it was stronger than me…Please don't hate me. I love you and I did it for you too."

His eyes were glassy and he seemed panicked. You shook your head in denial and took his hand in yours bringing it close to your lips and kissed his knuckles.

"No, you're a good person, Coryo. Nothing has changed. I continue to love you, and you only proved me during the night that I couldn't find a better one."

Coriolanus wrapped his arms around you and kissed your forehead.

"You know you don't have to…you don't have to be afraid of me. I wouldn't hurt you. Never."

You froze for a brief moment. It was as if he was reading your mind. How could you think that about him? He saved you. If not for him, you would be dead.

It was stronger than that. When he approached you this morning your heart was beating faster and a chill went through your body.

"It's because I love him. Typical reaction" You repeated to yourself in your mind.

Every time you felt his hands stroking your hair while you were hugging, you thought about how tightly he gripped that wooden plank with which he cracked the head of the boy in the arena. How the blood spurted onto his snow white shirt from his school uniform. And those eyes. The eyes that always made you feel butterflies in your stomach, and then they seemed so unfamiliar. You thought about how later after the situation at the arena, he tried to approach you, and you took a step back with your eyes wide open in horror.

Of course, he knew. You don't need to read minds to know that. And he was intelligent. He knew right away.

"I know, I know, Coryo. It's just…" you knew that if you continued your voice would break. Besides, you didn't know what to say. You snuggled into his neck hugging him more tightly at the waist. You don't want to hurt him with such thoughts, but they are so intrusive. You can't get them out of your head despite his reassurances, affectionate words and gentle touch. "I'm sorry, I should be there for you, and I'm making everything worse."

You whispered soaking the collar of his shirt with your tears.

His hand went to your hair gently stroking it.

"Stop, it's not your fault."

You stayed like that in each other's embrace, in silence. Words are not important now. What is important is that you are together and nothing will change that.

He will not hurt you. Yes, he won't hurt you.

#coriolanus snow x reader #coriolanus x reader #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #the hunger games #coriolanus snow #tbosas #coriolanus x you #thg x reader #hunger games x reader #character x reader #x you #x reader #coriolanus snow fanfiction #coriolanus snow imagine #coriolanus snow fic

[alastors-antlers]

Why Alastor is good aroace rep after all, written by an aroace

Hello all! I just want to start off this post by saying that I'm one person who definitely doesn't speak for all aroaces, but I wanted to make a post on this anyway, and maybe some folk would be interested in hearing out another perspective?

I'm not really caught up on everything that's been said over the course of HH's creation - only more recent interviews, since I'm pretty new to the fandom. Apologies if I've missed anything, but also I do not have the time to keep up with all the out-of-canon-material backstory unfortunately. I'm working with what we've got here.

So here's the thing:

Alastor is cruel, he's narcissistic, he doesn't care about anyone except himself, he's a serial killer and a monster.

(That's the argument I've heard - please tell me if that's not really what people are going for lol, in which case I've totally misunderstood?)

The issue with aroace rep when it paints asexual people with those traits is that it aims to dehumanizes them. Sex and love are essential to the human experience, right? So why wouldn't someone be interested? Because they're self-absorbed, and cold, and detached. They don't have the capacity to love others enough to feel romance.

And sure, Alastor is a killer, and a schemer, and prideful, and a monster by hell's standards. But no matter how above it all and stylish and in control and provocative he wants to be, he's a very human character, and his aroace-ness never serves to add to his alienation. You could even say that it makes him seem even more personable.

That's what I think is the key difference.

why he's human

Alastor's whole persona is about control, and he basically straight-up says this. He's controlling what his enemies know, what his public image is like. His goal is to be the Radio Demon -- overlord of Hell, charismatic, Machiavellian, and undefeatable. He's not. Despite that smile plastered over his face (a powerful tool, huh) he's so expressive for someone who's constantly pretending.

You see his exasperation with the Egg Bois and with Charlie's ranting; his nervousness in front of Zestial; his frustration with Lucifer and the petty lengths he goes to to piss off the ruler of Hell.

You see his desperation, making that deal with Charlie. He's surprised by the idea of being vulnerable in front of an enemy like Adam, and so close to danger. He drops the radio filter and the affect out of fear, and runs on broadcast TV to let out panic and anger and bitterness in his hideout, where no one else can see him.

He has a smile that tells us he's genuinely happy to see someone; it's a little wider than his default. You see it with Mimzy's greeting, you see it with Rosie. Rosie, especially, serves to make Alastor more human to the audience. More on this later, but for now, I'm just saying that you can see that he at least seems to respect her greatly. Whatever bond they have, we know that he trusts her to touch him, to share history with him, and with support that he trusts no one else for.

He pretends, but he can't pretend it all away. Loads of these emotions aren't even advantageous for him to show. It isn't necessarily how the typical asexual psychopath acts; he's not emotionless or only capable of anger or brutality.

He's so full of emotion that it leaks through, despite all that he does to avoid it. He's not inhuman and aloof, not really - he's so, so human, even when he tries not to be because he thinks that'll be what keeps him above all the rest. In control, and free from his chains.

(If anyone wants to see images about all this, I'll make a separate post - just let me know.)

(I also have another post, talking about why Alastor is at least a little attached to the hotel's residents too, shown via conversation with Niffty. In what way? different question.)

how the aroace part contributes to that

Now, to be fair, we don't hear much about his aroaceness in canon. It's just not relevant a lot of the time.

In the pilot, Angel's proposition ruffles his feathers so much that Alastor blanks for a moment. It's a joke, sure, but that ace panic face is a pretty popular Alastor moment in the fandom - Alastor, thrown off-balance by a sex joke of all things, after so many years in Hell that he should probably be used to this.

It's a moment that makes him more approachable; his aroaceness shows him unprepared for something someone else does for one of the only real moments in the whole episode.

And the other part: the ace in the hole statement.

Rosie apparently knows Alastor so well that she read that he's aroace. That tells us about their relationship; namely, that it is long-standing and genuine enough that she gleaned a piece of real information from him. It's a casual fact that she knows about him before he even figured it out himself. It lends legitimacy to their bond - this bond that shows us a more comfortable and warm side of Alastor that we don't often see.

If their relationship is purely business, isn't this something pretty frivolous and personal? It's not like he has anything to gain by telling her about his life, but she learned about it somehow. How close are they? That's where it adds a layer of complexity and personality to his character..

thoughts on representation

Overall, Alastor's an interesting character who has a level of depth and care and personality (outside of cruelty) that asexual psychopath tropes lack. Again, the moments where he's being represented as disinterested in sex or romance don't make him seem detached. Again, they don't say "look how hostile toward relationships his behaviour is - how separate he is from our humanity". That's what bad villain ace rep is. That's not what the show's doing.

Also: I'm not saying that we need to lower our standards or anything, but even if you think it's not the best rep, I feel like we should be supporting HH's efforts here. I know that on Tumblr we have a pretty queer-friendly space going, which is honestly an understatement lol but

Aces are incredibly underrepresented in fiction. There's a whole Wikipedia page about asexual characters in media, and it's short as all hell, and even if you consider what's on there you see quite a number of one-off characters who are never mentioned again.

In terms of real life business - before the DSM updated their definition of hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD) in 2013, identifying as asexual wasn't even a recognized thing. If you talked to a clinician about your lack of sexual desire, you could be diagnosed with a disorder. Only in the 5th edition do we now have a little exclusion footnote about it.

The concept of asexuality hasn't been explored nearly as much as other queer identities in our scientific research. We get crumbs in terms of mainstream representation and understanding. House M.D. has an episode where House "disproves" us because he's just so smart.

Alastor isn't going to be perfect representation. There's no such thing as perfect representation, and from the moment he was conceptualized, you could see how people would take him poorly. Still, I think he's a net positive.

He isn't a side character or a token ace - he's a core part of the show, whose personality and character motivations we can reasonably presume are going to be explored much more deeply in upcoming season(s). He's loved by the fandom. Right now, given what we know, I trust Vivziepop to write the aroace representation he deserves, because with the way I've heard the cast/directing/etc. talk about him, they're trying to do the aroace community justice, so I wish people would let up just a little on the whole "Alastor is bad rep".

Let's give him a chance, all right?

#hazbin hotel #aroace alastor #alastor analysis #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel spoilers #asexual #asexuality #hazbin alastor meta #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin #alastor #hazbin meta #hazbin analysis

[svsss-fanon-exposed]

Exposing SVSSS Fanon: 2/∞

SHEN JIU VISITS BROTHELS ONLY TO SLEEP AND NOT FOR SEX

Rating: FANON - SUPPORTED

It is a widely-held belief in the fandom that Shen Jiu only visits brothels to sleep and for comfort, and never has sex with the women. However, the only thing that is directly stated is that his purpose for visiting brothels is for seeking the company of women, and because he feels more comfortable around women than men.

 Though Shen Qingqiu was unpopular among his peers, it wasn’t to the extent of being kicked out of the communal sleeping quarters. He just loathed being in close quarters with those of the same sex... ...Liking women wasn’t the least bit shameful, but treating women like saviors, cowering within their embrace and seeking courage from them…even without anyone saying it, Shen Qingqiu knew that was horrendously shameful.

There is nowhere that directly states he does not have sex while at the Warm Red Pavillion. In fact, after Yue Qingyuan sends Liu Qingge away during the confrontation, it states that:

One person’s [SQQ] clothes were mussed and disheveled, while the other’s [YQY] had not a thread out of place. 

It's often argued that the dishevelled and undressed state (a few paragraphs later, Shen Qingqiu is putting his outer clothes back on) is due to Shen Qingqiu having a fight with Liu Qingge, however, in this scene, Yue Qingyuan is able to stop the fight before Shen Qingqiu can even draw his sword, or before an intense fight can occur.

Yue Qingyuan saw that the situation didn’t look good and pressed Shen Qingqiu’s elbow downward, preventing him from drawing his sword.

It's important to note that it is uncertain whether the two had already come to blows at this point, or if Yue Qingyuan was able to prevent any sort of physical fight from occuring. It is also uncertain whether Shen Qingqiu's state of undress and dishevelment is from sleeping at the brothel, fighting with Liu Qingge, or the earlier fight with BZP disciple Ji Jue, which we do know actually came to blows-- maybe it is a combination of the three.

Therefore, it cannot be said with certainty that Shen Jiu does not have sex with the women at Warm Red Pavilion. However, even if Shen Jiu had undressed to sleep there, it still doesn't mean that he had sex. There's just as much, if not more likelihood that it is only for companionship. He is never described as being fully undressed, so while he probably didn't remove his outer robe just for a fight with Bai Zhan Peak, he was still wearing his inner clothes, which would be normal for simply sleeping in.

There is more evidence that he does not have sex with the women at WRP than otherwise, however, especially when considering the infamous exchange between SQH and SQQ in Bai Lu Forest:

Shen Qingqiu asked. “And where am I supposed to find a male virgin’s pee out in the middle of nowhere?” Once these words left his mouth, he realized that Shang Qinghua was gazing intently at him. “Why are you looking at me?! As for my former self—let’s not talk about that for now. You wrote Shen Qingqiu’s original character yourself. He’s unsullied without, degenerate within, always burning with lust. He had an affair in his youth and sought prostitutes as an adult. You think I’m still a virgin? And don’t point at yourself, Shang Qinghua was written the same way.”

Though with this passage one can make a fairly good argument that Shen Jiu was a virgin, since Shang Qinghua never directly refuted what Shen Qingqiu was saying, it still cannot be said with complete certainty.

The accusation that Shen Jiu was a lecher who was visiting brothels simply to satisfy his lust is canonically false. The real reason that Shen Jiu visited brothels was to seek comfort. However, it is not explicitly stated that the comfort he sought out never included sexual relations, which could still be seen as part of that comfort.

In conclusion, it is fairly likely that Shen Jiu did not have sex at brothels, and only slept there, however, since only the intention was disproved in canon, and not the actions themselves, it cannot be stated as a directly-confirmed, canonical fact and may be interpreted otherwise.

#svsss #shen jiu #fanon exposed #supported

[froschli96]

As an asexual Good Omens fan

There's something I've noticed in this fandom that makes me really uncomfortable, and that is the way that Crowley and Aziraphale's possible asexuality is constantly being connected to and justified by them being not human.

I just honestly really hate that, because implying that asexuality is something that somehow "logically" follows from characters being nonhuman is ... not great. Like, I hate having to be the one to point this out, but asexuality is, in fact, very much a human attribute.

And unfortunately, most of the time when I come across this take, it doesn't feel like someone seeing themselves in the characters and relating to their experience, but rather an othering, this kind of otherwordly pure non-sexualness, where people put these characters above such trivial things like sexuality.

I am not asexual because I am somehow confounded by this oh so complicated human concept of sexuality, or because I don't ever think or care about sexuality at all (a lot of thinking was unfortunately involved actually before I finally came to a conclusion about my identity) it is just a fact of who I am, as a human being, it’s a part of my human experience.

And let's be honest, attributing asexuality to nonhuman characters is not the hot new take a lot of people seem to think it is — this trope has been around for ages. And it hasn't done a great deal to normalize asexuality. In fact I'd argue it's perpetuated an othering of ace people, but you take what you can get, really. (This is not to say that it is in any way wrong to identify with these kinds of characters, I definitely do, too! It's just sad that the topic of discussion is always about how "human" someone can be considered when they don't feel sexual or romantic attraction)

To be honest, I don't actually see A&C being asexual as canon — as a lot of people seemingly do — just because the author kind of suggested it in a tweet where he basically conflates "asexual" and "sexless" (for the record, this is not a dig at Neil, I just think the implications were kind of unfortunate, even if it might not have been intentional, which makes it all the more frustrating that a lot of fans just ran with it). And yeah, going around calling people aphobic for seeing the Ineffable Husbands as gay rep or any other identity, when they’re oh so obviously canonically ace, is honestly kind of insane.

I get that it might feel nice and tempting to be able to "claim" these characters and this relationship and being able to tell other fans off whose headcanons on their sexuality differ from your own because it is hard to come by any kind of representation when you're ace and there's finally a creator who's not only not contemptuous towards but even supportive of fans reading his characters as queer. And if you feel represented by A&C as it is then all the more power to you. But the thing is, it doesn't matter what kind of justifications there are or what canon might or might not say (bc when has that ever mattered in fandom spaces) or what the creator says, you cannot convert people to your opinion about a character, and you're going to have a bad time if you spend your time in fandom trying to do that.

And really, I am just wondering why we necessarily even need an explanation or justification for them possibly being asexual. Why does it have to be that all angels and demons are asexual by virtue of being nonhuman, and so A&C have to be too? why can't that just be an aspect of them that is completely unrelated to them not being human? Could these characters maybe not simply identify as asexual, not because they're nonhuman, but in spite of it? (btw, in the same vein it is equally stupid to argue that A&C can't be ace because they have "gone native", which is also an argument I've come across)

Honestly, I'm not even asking anyone to fundamentally change how they see these characters here — if you think they must be asexual solely because they're angels and have no concept of human sexuality, then whatever, I can't stop you and I don’t want to police anyone's headcanons bc as I said that's stupid and a waste of time. What I am asking you is that you maybe reflect a little bit on why exactly it is that humanity and sexuality are somehow so intrinsically linked in your mind to the point where you automatically use it as a way to distinguish between human and nonhuman characters.

Anyways.

Tldr: please stop equating asexuality with non-humanness thank you and good day.

#good omens #gomens tv #ineffable husbands #aziraphale #crowley #asexual #lgbtqia #This is a long post and I’m probably kicking the hornet’s nest here even if only a few people see this #but I had to put this into words before I explode. #bc this take is so pervasive in this fandom #and its frustrating bc theres never any real discussion about how their relationship might be relatable to ace people #its just taken as a forgone conclusion

[undercovercameron]

a domesticated rafe cameron

summary: a bf headcanon for sir rafe m.f. cameron

notes: *NSFW NEAR THE END* i have been seeing so many headcanons for rafe as a bf recently and i used to do these all the time for other fandoms and people and holy fuck i miss and love them.. allow me to indulge myself. also a lot of these are not simply him being touchy or super cute positive ones bc he’s canonically a murderer and drug addict and felon sooo akdjdjd we all of course romanticize him but i just thought i’d say that. lemme know what you think !

tags: rafe cameron x reader

i think rafe is a very complicated kind of lover

he’s a complex ass dude as it is, so that obviously reflects in your relationships

your relationship probably started unconventionally, either because of a fuck up or drunken mistake or maybe even meeting him randomly on a golf course or on the beach and just immediately being drawn to each other

he wants someone that challenges him a Little bit but really just wants someone to go with the flow and let him take the lead

he already gets enough direction and bossy shit from his family

(probably a couple arguments have sparked because of that; he sees too much of rose or ward in you. it’s also something that draws him to you, though, so take it with a grain of salt)

on the topic of arguments, you two are no stranger to them

he always ends up apologizing though, even if you started it—he’d just much rather have your mouth on his than have it yelling at him and knows there’s always a way to get you back on his side

he’s a proud man, so his apologies are usually in the form of him complimenting you or giving entirely hypothetical situations in which he Possibly Might Be Sorry

you take it because it’s probably the best you’re gonna get

he shows his love and affection in a little different ways that other people you’ve dated

of course he’s no stranger to PDA

in fact it only puffs his chest that you want to be seen with him and touch him

he’ll never admit it, but he loves when you kiss his face

like duh,

but not just his lips, he really likes when you kiss him on the temple or just press your face to his cheek or peck at his jaw

he also likes when you hold onto his belt when getting his attention or trying to move him

a lot of your dates involve watching a movie or TV show, because truth be told he is a home body

maybe not his home, but def a home body

your house is a reminder that he is apart of your life; he sees the pictures, the movie tickets, his favorite chips (salt and vinegar, ew i know), or spares of toothbrushes and his clothes in your closet

in any social situation he is either looking at you, thinking of looking at you, touching you, or asking people where you are

he cannot stand to make small talk without his emotional support girlfriend at his side

you’re just so much funnier than all these other people

he prides himself on his ability to make you blush, and does it any chance he gets

he doesn’t really get to laugh a lot, as he is either in distress or about to get punched or reprimanded, so you’re always whispering some joke into his ear to get him to laugh. your success rate is much better than anyone else’s in his life

he knew he loved you when you grabbed his hand during a dinner you were at and some politician walked in with a very apparent and badly concealed nose job. you just mouth “oh my god” and he had to snort to cover up his laugh

you were also all dolled up and cute and sexy that night so that may have had something to do with him knowing he loved you

he is also a great communicator

it’s not in his nature to hide his feelings because they’re so fucking obvious on that expressive face of his

and he never knew he could have so much fun texting until you came along

now he’s a regular emoticon user

weird, right?

now onto spicy things,

you’ve never known a partner to ask you how you feel more than Rafe

it’s a praise thing, you think

he wants to hear that he feels good, that right there, that he fucks you so good, that he’s perfect for you

the nonverbal sign that all those are true is when you throw your head back and a gasp is caught in your throat

the very idea that your breath is stolen every time he does something good makes his heart skip a beat

his cheeks get very red while you’re having sex, so your cool fingers are usually petting them or pressed near them

you have a thing for his legs

i mean come on

he just walks around like that all day

he walks around with a dick like that in his pants all day, and you’re supposed to just ignore it?!

absolutely not

you especially like when he wears those hoochie daddy 5 inch inseam swim trunks, because you get to see where his skin gets a little paler and softer and it makes you get goosebumps at the thought of where it leads

those trunks are a treat usually, saved for a special occasion where he doesn’t have to be around his family and he can have you in his lap, hand trapped between your legs

let’s just say you two fuck like rabbits

two beautiful young adults, what else occupies your time?

it gets a little annoying for other people when you’re apart of their dinner party, because you’re always late, but then learn to just deal with it

it’s better to not have a sexually frustrated rafe cameron that accidentally stabs through his plate of rice and vegetables like that one time at the island club with your parents when you licked up a drop of lemon sauce from your chin and his eyes nearly bulged out of his head

decidedly not a great time or place to act like that

anyways,

i just think while yours’ and rafe’s relationship def has its ups and downs like all other relationships, your recovery period after an argument is remarkably high

you both know you’re not mad anymore, so it’s not worth it to be bad communicators and make it worse

at the end of the day, there’s always space for you in his bed, and he always welcomes you with a slap on the ass and a whisper of “we’re totally fucking in the shower tomorrow”

(and yes. you do)

notes: i hope this doesn’t seem to scatterbrained, i may or may not end up adjusting or editing this later to be closer to what i think would be him

#obx #obx 3 #rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron x fem!reader #rafe cameron flufff #rafe cameron smut #obx headcanon #rafe cameron headcanon #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron fanfic #obx fanfic #obx fanfiction

[janaispunk]

still bejeweled

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

word count: ~4.4k

summary: after breaking up with your boyfriend, your self-esteem is crushed. your best friend takes you to your favorite bar to take your mind off of things. there's a band is playing there tonight and the singer immediately catches your eye. inspired by taylor swift's bejeweled – and when i meet the band, they ask, 'do you have a man?', i could still say, 'i don't remember'

tags/warnings: explicit smut, only 18+, no/pre-outbreak au, no sarah, musician!joel, small age gap (reader is in her late 20s, joel's in his mid 30s), alcohol consumption, joel pulls her hair, able-bodied reader, a bit of angst, fluff, making out, fingering, dirty talk (joel talks you through it, i just know it), praise kink, unprotected p in v (i just didn't feel like mentioning it, this is my fantasy world where pregnancies & sti's don't exist, but they very much exist in the real world, don't do this), joel has a big dick (it's canon), consent king joel, rough sex, ass-slapping, hair-pulling, please let me know if i missed anything!

a/n: this came to me while making breakfast and listening to taylor, and didn't want to leave my head again. pretty self indulgent, i'm fairly certain that a musician!joel in my life would fix me. also, to boyfriends everywhere: fuck you <3

• dividers by the lovely @saradika!

• find my full masterlist here!

You storm out of the apartment, fighting back the tears that are threatening to spill over. This is it for good, you tell yourself. It's not the first fight of the sort that you and your boyfriend Max – now ex-boyfriend, you guess – have gotten into, with you usually backing down eventually, to keep the peace between the two of you. You've been together for more than three years, and you had hoped that this might be the one – the guy that you can settle down with, the one that you've been waiting for.

But over the past few months, Max has gotten more distant, less involved in the relationship, less interested in you, making you feel like you're burdening him, like you're always asking for too much. Like you are too much. You had asked several times if something was bothering him, something that you could work through together. Everything's fine babe, I don't know why you're even asking. Stop getting on my nerves with this.

You scoff to yourself. Usually, this was the point where you would step back from the argument, not willing to invest energy in a fight that wouldn't lead to anything anyway. Maybe things weren't perfect with Max, but they were what you knew. Familiar, comfortable. Better than being alone. Maybe not the big love that books and movies told you about, but who knows if that sort of thing even exists.

But today, when he just wouldn't give a shit about anything you said, something inside of you had snapped. “I feel like you don't even love me anymore. Do you?!” you had demanded, and the look on his face had told you everything that you needed to know.

That's how you find yourself on the street in front of your best friend's place, the short walk having somewhat cleared your head. Who does Max even think he is? It's not too much to ask to care about your partner, to show interest in them, to support them, is it? And he hasn't done any of that in quite some time.

All things considered, he just wasn't that great of a boyfriend. Still, you can't help feeling sad about it. Another relationship failed, another guy that just didn't deem you as good enough to pay attention to you. Maybe you're just not that interesting, a voice in your head whispers. You sniffle and shake your head, willing the thought out of your mind.

Your best friend Amanda greets you at her door, immediately clocking your slumped shoulders and reddened eyes, and hugs you tightly while leading you into her living room. Her concern for you elicits another wave of tears and you shakily recap today's events to her. She listens patiently, thankfully not telling you that you're better off without him or something like that, because even though you know that yourself, you don't think you could bear someone else saying it.

“I just can't believe that I'm single again and need to start over once more and I just-,” you bite your lip, willing away the tears that are pooling in your eyes, “I just feel like I'm not enough, like I can't keep a guy or I'm too picky, I don't know. It's just so frustrating, I don't wanna end up alone.”

Amanda's expression softens and she pulls you into her arms again. “You're not gonna end up alone, I promise you. You're funny and smart and,” she looks you up and down, “fucking hot. But you can't settle for less just because you're scared of ending up alone, okay? You're gonna find the guy that's right for you and then it will all make sense. Promise.”

You sigh, not sure if you believe her but also not in the mood to argue. After more talking, during which she eventually slips a glass of wine into your hand, Amanda decides that the two of you should go out tonight. Blow off some steam, show the world and yourself that you've still got it, as she puts it. You're honestly not sure if you've ever had it to begin with, but you let her enthusiasm wash over you, playing along as she insists that you wear one of her skimpiest dresses and starts doing your make up. You feel a little self-conscious with the tiny black dress that she has put you in and the dramatic red lipstick that she's currently applying to your lips.

“Don't look at me like that. You look so good and you'd know that if that fucker hadn't made you feel like you didn't for the past few months. But you've been too good of a girl for far too long now, and we're gonna change that tonight. Deal?” She expectantly holds her hand out for you to shake and you feel the excitement starting to bubble up in you. Maybe she's right and you do need to let go of your insecurities tonight. You shake her hand and she laughs delightedly, causing you to giggle as well.

Amanda finally declares that you're good to go, digging a sparkly handbag that's covered in tiny silvery jewels out of her closet. That one's actually yours, but you had left it at her place a few weeks ago after Max had told you how it was just too much and how you looked ridiculous with it. You had let it slide, thinking that it wasn't worth it to ruin the evening by fighting over a stupid handbag. What was wrong with you, you think to yourself now.

You look at yourself in her full-length mirror and you have to agree, you do look good. The short dress leaves most of your thighs bare, hugging your curves in all the right ways and the lipstick looks amazing, drawing the focus to the shape of your mouth. You do polish up real nice.

Amanda's boyfriend Patricks whistles appreciatively when you both exit from the bedroom and wishes you loads of fun. That's what a boyfriend should be like, you think to yourself. Supportive, loving, and just... kind?

Amanda drags you to one of your favorite bars. You've been here countless times together; usually it's a good crowd and the drinks are cheap. It's live music night, you realize as you walk in and notice the small stage at the far end of the room, which also explains why it's more crowded than usual. You push through a few people and manage to find two seats at the bar, from where you can watch the stage and hear the music, but it isn't too loud to talk.

The bartender comes up to you and Amanda orders tequila shots before you can even open your mouth. “I would've stuck to wine,” you complain to her and she shrugs, a big grin on her our face.

“That wouldn't be half as fun. We're going all out tonight, remember?”

You roll your eyes and nod, but when you down the first shot and bite down on the lime, you can't help the laugh that bubbles up in your throat. “That's my girl!” Amanda giggles and promptly orders another round. After two more shots and feeling the tingling warmth that's spreading through your body, you let your eyes wander around the room until they find the stage.

It's mostly local bands that play here, some better than others, and tonight's isn't half bad. It's four guys, a little older than you, mid-thirties if you had to guess, and their music has an acoustic, country-ish vibe to it. Your eyes linger on the man in the front, who is softly singing into the microphone while strumming along on his guitar.

He's kinda hot, you muse to yourself, gaze trained on the way his muscles are softly flexing while he's plucking on the guitar strings with his large hands, the sleeves of his dark t-shirt straining against his arms. His deep voice is washing over you, reminding you of whiskey and honey, and you squint a little to take a closer look at his face. He has a strong jaw and pouty lips, and dark, expressive eyes that gaze into the room while he's singing. You can't explain it, but something about him just feels... warm. Like he's safe. Kind.

He has a scruffy beard and messy curls, giving him a sort of rugged look, that, combined with his incredibly broad shoulders, has you biting your lip subconsciously. How easily he could cage you in, how big and warm his hands would feel on your body...

Damn, he's really hot. And you really feel the tequila talking right now.

Amanda's fingers appear in your field of vision, snapping impatiently and you turn back to her, heat crawling up your cheeks. You might have been staring a bit too obviously. “Which one?” she grins.

“Huh?” you ask, rather poorly feigning innocence.

“Oh, come on! Okay, I'll guess,” she continues on, not giving you a chance to even try to deny anything, “it's the singer, right?”

“I-,” you start, but the look on her face tells you that it's already a lost cause, “yeah.”

She laughs delightedly and gestures to the bartender for another round of shots. “Oh, I don't think-,” you try to object, but she shushes you.

“I won't rest until you've made a move on that guy, good choice dare I say, and live a little. So drink up!” She toasts to you and you can't help laughing yourself before you tip your head back and swallow the burning alcohol in one go.

You steal another glance towards the stage – maybe a rather extended glance in all honesty – and catch the singer's eye. He holds your gaze for a few seconds, then he lets his eyes wander around the room, before returning to you, his lips curling into a knowing smirk when you're still looking at him.

You hastily tear yourself away, leaning into Amanda in an attempt of hiding how flustered you're suddenly feeling. “That was fucking hot,” she breathes into your ear.

“I know,” you whisper back urgently. Then the insecurity kicks back in. “Do you think he really meant me? I mean, we're all the way in the back here, I bet he can barely see-”

Amanda swats at your arm, shaking her head. “Please, he totally meant you. You're gonna talk to him later, you hear me?”

You groan, “Oh my god,” and lean into her further. “I'm not cut out for all this, I wouldn't even know what to say.” She tsks at you and orders another round of drinks, not taking No for an answer.

You loosen up a little over time, throwing a few more glances towards the stage and delight in the way he always seems to just wait for you to look at him. When you've made eye contact several times, he winks at you and you can't help but giggle, a kind of warmth spreading through you that has nothing to do with the alcohol. A wide grin stretches across his face as he announces the last song for the night. You give up all pretenses, your eyes basically glued to him until he strums his guitar one last time, then thanks the audience and joins his bandmates as they wander off the stage.

The bands usually pack up, then join the bar's patrons for a few beers. You try not to appear totally desperate and refrain from staring at the door that leads backstage, instead busying yourself with your drink and listening to Amanda, when you feel someone sliding to the bar counter behind you and a hand lands to rest on your shoulder. A very big, very warm hand, you come to notice, before a deep, honeyed voice floats into your ear, causing you to turn around.

“Hi. Can I buy you a drink?”

He seems even bigger up close, and even more handsome, and your lips part slightly, taking him in. You take a beat too long to answer, just sinking into his deep brown eyes, and a grin slowly spreads across his face. “I'm Joel, by the way.” He extends a hand for you to shake and you blink, shaking yourself out of your staring, quickly taking his hand and offering your own name.

His hand dwarfs yours, enveloping it in his warmth and you feel yourself blush. This is the moment, you tell yourself. “I'd love a drink,” you smile at him and he flags down the bartender to take your order. You steal a glance at Amanda, who's nodding enthusiastically.

“So...” Joel drawls when you have your drink, still standing so close to you that you're almost touching, with a smirk playing around the corner of his mouth, “do you have a man, or-?”

Your thoughts briefly flicker to Max, but you find that you can barely remember how devastated you felt mere hours ago, that you can hardly recall his face right now. “No... no, I don't.”

“She most certainly does not, she's all yours,” Amanda chimes in, leaning around you and beaming at Joel.

You can't help but giggle at the entire situation, pleasantly buzzing with both the alcohol in your system and the feeling of having Joel in your direct proximity, and finding him more attractive with every minute that you look at him.

“I really liked your performance,” you tell him and his grin widens.

“Yeah? I could tell, sweetheart.” You laugh; the pet name has your heart soaring in your chest, but you feel completely relaxed with him, not awkward, not desperate to please him or keep his interest. You just feel... good. Really, really good.

Talking to him is easy. He makes you laugh, makes you feel comfortable, and your cheeks almost hurt from smiling so much, but you can't stop. He's constantly touching you, his hand lingering on your shoulder, your arm, sliding down to your waist, and leaving goosebumps in its wake.

When he pulls at your hips to pull you off your bar stool, you quickly follow his lead, letting him sway you around to the music that's now playing from the juke box, giggling the entire time. You feel like a teenager, but you couldn't care less. You're tipsy, you're happy, the easily most attractive man that you've ever met seems to be more than interested in you – you feel amazing.

Joel's hand comes up to cup your face, his calloused fingertips brushing over your cheek and you lean into his touch. His eyes flick down to your lips and your breath stutters in your chest. Your arms wrap around his neck at the same time that he leans in until his mouth meets yours, your lips eagerly opening against his.

A pleased hum is rumbling up in his chest and both of his hands grab at your hips, pulling your body flush against him as his tongue licks into your mouth. Your hands burrow into the messy curls at his neck and you all but whimper against his lips. You feel his mouth curl into a smile before he pulls away, the look in his eyes a little dazed, mirroring your own.

“You you wanna come home with me?” he asks quietly, “I live right around the corner.”

There's no need to even think about it, you want this man desperately. You quickly check on Amanda, who waves you off with a shit-eating grin and some rather crude words of encouragement.

You swing your glittery purse over your shoulder and Joel whistles lowly. “That's fancy. I like it.”

Your eyes widen slightly. “You do?”

“Yeah. Suits you.” A wide smile is spreading across your face and, without a second thought, you grab his hand to pull him out of the bar.

He really lives close nearby and you're stumbling through a dark hallway barely five minutes later. Joel has his hands on your hips and his lips on your mouth, kissing you roughly as he leads you into what you presume is the direction of his bedroom. He kicks the bedroom door shut behind you and crowds you up against the wood, his hands grabbing at your sides, pulling at the dress, revealing more skin to his touch.

The room is dimly lit, yellow light from the street below filtering in through the windows, and his eyes roam over you. “Fuck, you're so hot,” he growls and captures your mouth in another searing kiss, his hand coming up to palm at your breasts, roughly squeezing the flesh and running his thumb over your nipple through the fabric. You mewl into his mouth and he pulls back breathlessly. “You're an eager little thing, aren't you?” he murmurs and you arch your back, trying to press yourself back into his touch.

“Please, Joel,” you whimper and he chuckles before diving back in, his tongue hot in your mouth and his fingers creeping under your dress, toying with the hem of your underwear.

He pulls it aside, his fingers grazing your already soaked folds and you buck your hips into his touch. He slides your dress up higher until his hand comes to rest on your bare hip and he searches your face.

“You're feeling good? You want this?”

You nod eagerly and he tuts softly. “Gotta let me hear it, sweetheart.”

You bite your lip, his respectfulness paired with the dark look in his eyes spurring your arousal on even further. “I want it, please.”

“Good girl, so polite too,” he murmurs and your legs almost buckle underneath you. His hand travels back between your legs, grabbing at your underwear and quickly pulling it off of you, before his fingers are back, sliding through your wetness and circling your clit slowly.

“Fuck, you're dripping. So good for me, all eager and ready, huh?”

The whine that comes out of you sounds faintly like a “yes” and he presses another kiss to your lips, before he thrusts two fingers into you, stretching you deliciously.

“Fucking tight,” he murmurs against your mouth, his voice sounding wrecked already. He sets a languid pace, pausing every so often to curl his fingers deep within you, hitting that spongy spot that has your legs shaking and your hands grabbing at his shoulders as high-pitched whines fall out of your mouth.

You can see the pleased smirk on his face as you're falling apart on just his fingers. His other hand travels up to the straps of your dress, pulling them down and revealing your breasts to him.

His lips suck on the newly exposed flesh and you hear him mutter, “so fucking pretty” against your skin. His mouth travels to your nipple, flicking his tongue over the hardened bud, while his fingers keep thrusting and curling inside of you.

Heat is boiling in your abdomen, licking at your spine and you can almost taste your orgasm already. “Joel, I'm gonna- please don't stop, please,” you manage to breathe out.

“You're gonna come on my fingers, pretty girl?” he asks, before sucking your nipple back into his mouth. “Go ahead, let me feel it.” His thumb starts to toy with your clit in quick, precise circles, and you gasp. The heat spreads through your entire body as your orgasm takes hold of you, your toes curling and your legs shaking while you pulse wildly around his fingers.

“Good girl, you look so pretty when you come,” Joel whispers, trailing kisses from your breasts up to your neck as you slowly come down from your high.

Joel maneuvers you to his bed, supporting your weight and gently setting you down until you're sprawled out on the covers. You can still feel the aftershocks from your orgasm, but your want for him is coursing through you like a wildfire and you eagerly stretch your arms out for him.

He chuckles, mumbling something about you being insatiable and quickly pulls his shirt over his head, revealing golden skin and a body that's obviously strong and muscular, but he still has a softness to him.

You sit back up and scoot closer, your hands flying to his beltbuckle as you press kisses against his belly, reveling in the way his breath hitches and his muscles are twitching under your mouth.

You tilt your head up, silently asking for permission as you tug on his pants and he nods, smiling down at you. You pull his pants and underwear down in one go, desperate to see all of him, and you can't help the soft gasp that escapes your mouth at the sight before you.

He's fucking big, and you should probably worry about fitting all of him inside of you, but instead the fire in your abdomen is flaring up again and you subconsciously press your thighs together.

Joel leans down to you, pulling your already bunched up dress over your head and leaving you just as bare as he is.

“Like what you see, sweetheart?” he smirks.

“I- yeah,” you nod, shyly smiling up at him and he pecks your lips.

“Me too.”

He crowds you in, his broad body looming over yours as you lay back down on the bed and his fingers find their way in between your legs again. He grazes your clit, then swirls a finger through your wetness, spreading it on your inner thighs, and your hips buck up into his touch, causing him to chuckle.

“Impatient little thing.”

You can barely form a coherent thought, you're desperate to feel his cock inside of you and you eagerly part your legs when he situates his body between them. He grabs at your thigh, spreading you open even wider, before landing a playful slap against the backside. An almost embarrassingly loud moan escapes you and Joel's smirk turns downright feral.

“You liked that, sweetheart? You like it when I'm a little rough with you?”

He's grinding his hips against you, sliding his cock through your wetness, the tip almost catching at your entrance. You're past the point of caring, nodding mindlessly, you just want him inside of you.

“Fuck, yes, please Joel, please.”

“Should've known,” he mumbles, “it's always the quiet ones. Actin' all shy, but you need it bad, don't you? Gonna fuck you so good, take such good care of you, don't you worry.”

You whimper, your breath catching in your throat when he lines his cock up with your center, his tip already parting your walls, but he stops himself again. “Tell me once more, sweetheart. You still good, still want this?”

“Yes Joel, fuck, I want it,” you whine. The words have barely left your mouth when he slams into you, filling you to the brim. You cry out at the sudden intrusion, your walls fluttering around his length, trying to accommodate him as he's splitting you open. The stretch is intense, bordering on painful, but you still feel yourself getting wetter around him, pain turning into pleasure as he stills inside of you for a few moments to let you adjust.

“Goddamn it, you're tight, you're taking me so good, such a good fuckin' girl.”

His mouth is close to your ear, muttering filth to you with his hot breath fanning against the sensitive skin on your neck. Another loud moan falls from your mouth at his words and you clench around his cock that's still buried deep inside of you, causing him to groan.

“Yeah you like that, wanna be a good girl for me, don't you?”

You nod breathlessly and he pulls out almost entirely before slamming back into you, setting a brutal rhythm that's forcing moans from your throat and has you wildly clenching around him. One of his hands is playing with your nipples again, pinching and pulling at your delicate flesh and sending delicious sparks of pleasure straight to your core while he's still fucking you deeply. It's incredible, already easily the best you've ever had, but you still want more, want him deeper.

“Oh my god, p-please Joel,” you stutter.

“Please what?”

“H-harder, please.” He growls at that, pulling himself out of you and flipping you around until you're on your knees, presenting your ass to him. He presses his cock back into you, knocking the air out of your lungs, and his hand connects with the skin on your ass cheek in a harsh slap.

“Knew you were a filthy little thing, fuck, just waitin' around for someone to give it to you hard, huh?” he growls. The way he's talking to you is going straight to your core and you feel a second high approaching rapidly.

His hand tangles in your hair, making a fist and pulling until you're arching your back, slightly changing the angle and letting him hit a spot inside of you that absolutely devastates you. There's stars dancing across your eyes, your thighs are quivering and your walls are pulsing rhythmically.

“Not someone, just- just for you,” you moan out, shuddering around him as another orgasm washes over you, your vision swimming and you're clamping down on him.

“Fuck, sweetheart,” Joel mutters, his hands grabbing your hips roughly and holding onto you with strong hands as he stills his movements and spills himself deep inside of you.

You feel almost delirious as Joel hugs you tightly to his body, kissing you deeply before he gently lays you down on the bed. He cleans you up, gets you a glass of water and covers you with a thick blanket before he slides into bed beside you.

His arm wraps around your middle and he pulls you closer against his chest, engulfing you in his warmth and peppering your bare neck and shoulders with kisses. You nuzzle into him, your eyes falling shut as you relax under his soft touches. You can't remember the last time you felt this good. Protected, cared for, happy.

“Sweetheart?” Joel's voice sounds from behind you and you give a little hum. “I know this started out like a one night thing, but-” he pauses, almost sounding a little shy, “promise me that you won't just vanish in the morning, okay?” You smile and crane your head to press your lips against his once more.

“I promise.”

a/n #2: ...yeah, this would definitely fix me. shout out to the real life amanda for being an amazing friend and the best hype woman, thank you for yelling about pedro with me 24/7. also shout out to the real life patrick for being an amazing boyfriend and providing us with insights about the male sexual experience lol. thank you guys for being the best adoptive parents to my third-wheeling single ass. <3

thank you so much for reading! if you liked this, please consider reblogging or leaving a comment!

#janaispunk #janas fics #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller smut #the last of us hbo #the last of us #the last of us fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #the last of us fic #pedro pascal characters fanfiction #pedrostories

[alzirrx]

So apparently I’m the only person that actually liked the Tyler/Wednesday dynamic, despite a couple things, so I’m about to make an entirely uncalled for essay defending them because I became very emotionally attached in the one night I spent watching this show

To start, I liked how awkward Tyler’s character was right off the bat, because I feel like you don’t see that kind of character type as love interests in much media. A lot of the time it’s overshadowed for the Golden Retriever or Angsty Brooding Type™, and it was really refreshing seeing a different archetype as a love interest. The way him and Wednesday coupled together was always kind of awkward and uncertain, but it felt kinda more real that way considering that’s how a lot of high school romances start out. I really loved the idea of a kind of “baby hold my flower” dynamic between the two, crazy obsessive outcast gf/laid-back supportive normie bf who makes posters to cheer her on during her rampages

On the flip side, once the reveal happened there was so much potential. I wanted his redemption so bad. I wanted him to go back to how he was, while also letting loose more on his more angry feral side while also getting a scene where he got to be redeemed. I was waiting for him to turn to their side any minute, with a speech afterwards about how yes his actions were bad, and while they weren’t his choice persay he just might have enjoyed them, but that doesn’t mean he never liked her! That was all him! Because in all honesty I liked his sweet and caring side contrasted with her cold unfeeling demeanor, although I do see many arguments being made in favor of the serial killer/serial killer stopper dynamic which could be explored

And in terms of canon: the date was adorable, well thought out and showed he actually knew her (like how a scary movie wouldn’t actually scare her: a chick flick would), the way he liked her dancing at the Rave’N, how he always brought her quads, the birthday cake + coffee, all the little sweet gestures of his

(I know that’s only the things he did- but this post is more about him than Wednesday)

I’m fairness, the “I thought you were sending signals” bit felt a little out of left field since she acted the same the whole time, but I’ve learned from experience that if you like someone and you hope they like you back, you can basically turn anything they do at all into a signal

All I’m saying is, ship what you want, but I feel that they worked a lot better than some people give them credit for, and if he hadn’t have been the Hyde they would’ve been really good together, and they still could be

TL;DR, Wednesday x Tyler worked and would also have worked better under different circumstances

#wednesday #wednesday x tyler #wednesday addams #tyler galpin #wednesday netflix

[moonrisecoeur]

moon! hi :3 pls do me a favor and imagine taking care of best friend!leon after he breaks up with his girlfriend and he’s all soft and subby and pleading with you to take him and make him feel wanted and useful :((

hi baby of course anything for u <3

i’m assuming you mean his girlfriend from pre-re2 so this would take place in a non canon universe ^-^ literally no warnings besides possibly cheating?? this is very soft and melancholic with a hopeful ending

he got into a big argument with his girlfriend, which is hard for you to even fathom. you know she did something bad because leon has been nothing but good to her. he’s always been caring, attentive, giving her everything she asks for and expecting nothing. he could give her the world ten times over and his knees would get weak if she gave him a kiss.

she must have really done something terrible, because leon’s here, at your place, begging you to let him in with tears in his slightly red eyes. pleading with you to give him the comfort and softness and reassurance he needs. so you do. because you love him.

though honestly? you know leon doesn’t like you like that. it’s okay that he doesn’t, because he has (had? you’re not sure yet) a girlfriend. he’s supposed to love her. he’s supposed to be loved by her.

so it’s just something you’ve had to live with if you want to keep leon in your life. he’s a good best friend, and a reliable shoulder to lean your head on when you need him. he’s always been there for you; this is your time to be here for him.

you let him in, having him sit on your couch while you get him some water and a blanket. you sit next to him while he tells you what happened. the details aren’t important, what is is that his hand is on your thigh as he talks, and you’re not sure if it’s only for the emotional support that physical touch brings people.

“i think i need some space from her. i think… i don’t know if we should break up… should we? do you think that’s for the best?” he asks, looking up at you. he truly values your opinion, even if he doesn’t know it’s secretly biased.

“i think it might be if you’re feeling this miserable,” you tell him, and he looks down at his hand, finally seeming to realize he’s been massaging your thigh muscles for the better half of ten minutes.

“oh, shit! sorry…” he apologies nervously, but doesn’t take his hand off of you.

“are you gonna.. let go?” you ask him, raising an eyebrow, and he doesn’t seem to have an answer.

“…do you want me to?” he asks in return, his voice is more timid than usual. he seems… nervous.

“no,” you say, and you make eye contact, suddenly a little bit closer than before, “it felt good…”

he nods slowly, not towards anything in particular, “i really appreciate you, you know…” he says suddenly, “i like being here with you. i like…” his voice trails off, his face seeming redder than usual.

you don’t respond, hoping that maybe he’ll build up the courage to say the final word, you. (you know he won’t).

“can i ask you for a favor?” he says, and you nod attentively, not realizing that you’re touching his arm in a soothing motion, but he definitely does, “can you tell me to leave… if you don’t want to deal with me being needy right now?”

“you’re not being needy because you need emotional support, leo—”

“not that kind of needy,” he says. when the dots connect in your head, you have to physically prevent yourself from gasping.

“leon, you- you have a girlfriend! i… i’m not just going to-”

“but i need you… please, don’t think about her. i… i’m gonna break up with her,” he tries to convince you.

as much as you want to say no, leon, you’ve said that before when she’s hurt you. you’re always going to keep running back to her, you can’t. clearly you don’t have it in you to turn him down. though a part of you aches knowing that it’s not you he needs, it’s just someone. someone to kiss away his worries and make him feel valuable.

you still press your lips to his shoulder, making your way up his neck to kiss his tear-stained cheeks, “no more crying,” you whisper to him, hands holding him gently, like he might just break, “only good feelings when you’re with me.”

“only when i’m with you,” he echos mindlessly, holding you back, hands on your hips to hold you close to him. it really hits you what leon meant when he said he was needy. he didn’t just mean he was horny, though you can tell he definitely is, but if he breaks up with his girlfriend, he doesn’t belong to someone. isn’t claimed, isn’t taken. is it a little insulting? maybe.

are you going to turn down the opportunity to fuck your best friend and make him yours, even for just a night? absolutely not.

“please,” he voice is strained, entangled with a hunger you’ve never gotten the pleasure to see in him before. even just thinking about the way she was allowed to touch him, the way you just know he looked at her like she was the stars in his sky.

you can see something else in his eyes now. he’s insecure, nervous, timid. he seems to be exuding this vibe of ‘i’ve never been good enough for her. please let me be good enough for you.’

he says to you, “wanna be yours.”

and so you let him, because you’d give leon anything, “i’ll make you mine, i promise,” you whisper in his ear, “can i kiss you?”

he forces out a shaky breath, nodding. you lean in to kiss him, fingertips brushing against his jaw. he makes a sound of pleasure, of satisfaction. your free hand reaches up to run through his hair.

when you pull away, his lips chase after yours, not wanting the moment to end.

“i need you,” he whimpers softly, eyes shut tightly for fear that you’d see him and hate when you saw in your best friend, “i’m sorry. i’m so sorry.”

“‘s okay, baby,” you mumble, pressing another kiss to his lips, which he accepts gladly, “you belong to me now, mkay? i’ll take good care of you. forget about her, you’ll be mine from now on.”

his heart skips a beat. he nods enthusiastically, “yours,” secretly, over the time of your friendship, his heart has always yearned for belonging, but especially to you.

and much later, when you’re both finally satisfied, his mind is quieter, not telling him all those bad things. instead, he’s laying on his back, enjoying the way your hands touch his neck and shoulder in smooth, comforting motions. he holds you with an arm wrapped around your waist like he’s pleading for you to never leave him.

maybe leon did like you in that way, it definitely seemed like it from the way tonight went. or maybe he didn’t, and he just needed someone to take him and make him theirs. he needed to belong to someone who wants him and needs him, to be useful and pleasurable to them. he gave you his all in hopes that you’d take him and make him feel wanted again.

who really cared about the semantics when you get to be with him in this moment? you appreciate every second more as he brushes a piece of your hair behind your ear and smiles softly at you... like a lover would.

#sub leon kennedy #leon kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x you #leon s. kennedy #leon kennedy smut #sub leon kennedy smut #resident evil #leon kennedy resident evil #resident evil smut #reader insert #smut #sub!leon #re2r leon #re2 smut #re2 #re2r

[indigovigilance]

Anthony, Anthony, Anthony

What does your Anthony mean, exactly?

I feel like your Anthony and my Anthony are different Anthonies…

In 1941 we learn that Crowley has named himself Anthony J. Crowley (Aziraphale doesn’t pronounce the H but closed captions write it and Neil Gaiman hashtags #Anthony and also it’s Anthony the script book so I guess Michael Sheen is just doing a thing idk). I haven’t seen extensive discussion of this topic but I’m going to jump in with both feet.

I propose that Anthony actually has a double meaning; that is, Crowley chose this name for one reason, but Aziraphale believes he chose it for another.

(I cite as indirect inspo a wonderful Tumblr meta about how the ineffable blockheads have completely different interpretations of Jane Austen and how this informs their S2 decision-making).

Read or bookmark for later on Ao3 because this got away from me and now it's a 2,888 word meta on people named Anthony what am I doing with my life

~~~

First and foremost, let it be stated that there is no canon for when Crowley anti-christened himself Anthony. Neil Gaiman himself won’t know until he writes it.

Secondly, let it be known that I am not an historian nor a literary scholar of any kind. So people who actually know these stories may find themselves cringing at my surface-level summaries and inaccurate interpretations: I’m just piecing together what I could find easily. I invite someone else to revise and republish if they can delve deeper on these topics. 

Part 1: Mark Antony

There is a bust of Marc Antony in Mr. Fell’s bookshop as of S1E1 modern day (2019) which is still there at the end of S2E6, where it features prominently in the center of a shot. In 2019, the bust is adorned with yellow ribbons; in 2023, it is naked. The flashback to 1941 doesn’t give a good view of the part of the shop where the bust would normally be located so I have no idea when the bust actually got added to Aziraphale’s collection. I’m going to assume, for argument’s sake, that Aziraphale acquired this bust after the Blitz. I’m going to further propose that he acquired this bust because he believes that Crowley named himself Anthony after Mark Antony.

Why would Aziraphale think that? Two reasons.

1) Mark Antony was the loser of a civil war for liberty

Mark Antony was a good and loyal Roman citizen, serving Caesar with distinction, even attaining the title of Master of the Horse (Caesar’s second-in-command). See additional metas on horse symbolism seen throughout S2. After the death of Caesar, however, Octavian and members of the senate turned on Antony, starting a civil war. You know, much like a certain someone we know that was involved in Dubious Battle on the Plains of Heaven.

Mark Antony was loyal to Caesar’s political mission, which was to establish a Roman republic, where the voices of the citizens would be heard through their representatives [a suggestion box, if you will]. But Antony’s defeat marked the end of the republic, ushering in an age of autocracy. Octavian, following his victory over Antony, crowned himself the first Emperor of Rome.

2) Mark Antony was a libertine, but also the loyal, ardent lover of Cleopatra

Mark Antony was an infamous, lascivious, debaucherous, womanizing lush. He was also Cleopatra’s lover and closest ally. Though Mark Antony could not often meet with Cleopatra, their affair was allegedly very romantic, and from afar Antony did everything in his power to support Cleopatra politically, expanding her territorial holdings even while they were apart for years. 

So legendary was Antony's wanton hedonism that when he went to Athens, he was deified as the New Dionysus, mystic god of wine, happiness, and immortality. Religious propaganda declared Cleopatra the New Isis or Aphrodite (mythic goddess of love and beauty) to his New Dionysus. The ineffable emperors, if you will. [source: Encyclopedia Britannica]

Parallels arising after 1941:

After Antony had officially divorced Octavian’s sister, Octavian formally broke off the ties of personal friendship with Antony and declared war, not against Antony but against Cleopatra. Much like how Shax, after her S2E1 “you scratch my back I’ll scratch yours” proposal, threatened Crowley that if he did not assist her search for Gabriel, Hell would declare war not on him but on Aziraphale.

The legacy of Mark Antony, therefore, is one of hedonism, romance, fighting for a cause that you believe in, and losing that fight. It’s easy to see how Aziraphale drew the conclusion that Anthony J. Crowley took his inspiration from this historical figure.

Part 2: Antony & Cleopatra

How is this a part 2? Weren’t we just talking about Mark Antony and his relationship with Cleopatra? Hear me out.

Crowley has never expressed much interest in politics. Every time something of political import happens, he declares that the humans made it up themselves while also taking credit for it with Hell. This includes 1793 Paris and the Spanish Inquisition. If I forgot any, drop them in the comments. 

But Crowley has a deep and pervasive interest in stories, especially romance stories. If he can keep the Bentley from turning it into Queen, he listens to the Velvet Underground. He watches Richard Curtis films (to the degree that he identifies them by director rather than by title). Though book canon is not show canon, it’s worth mentioning that his favorite serial is Golden Girls; while not a romance, it is certainly heartfelt storytelling at its finest and a homosexual staple.

We know, too, that Shakspeare stole a line from him, with an adjustment for pronouns:

"Age Does Not Wither, Nor Custom Stale His Infinite Variety”

Let’s first talk about Crowley’s context for the quote.

Picture it: the Globe Theater, 1601, the house is empty because it’s one of Shakespeare’s gloomy ones and an irritated young Burbage, in the role of Hamlet, is droning out his lines like he would rather be anywhere else.

Burbage: To be or not to be. That is the question.

Aziraphale: To be! I mean, not to be! Come on, Hamlet! Buck up!

Aziraphale looks at Crowley, grinning with delight. Crowley stares back at him, shaking his head slightly, but a smile tugs at the corner of his lip. He wants to be embarrassed, but cannot help being charmed.

Aziraphale: He’s very good, isn’t he?

Crowley: Age does not wither nor custom stale his infinite variety.

Crowley is looking up at the stage, and speaks immediately after Aziraphale has made a comment about Burbage. But is Crowley talking about Burbage? Does it stand to reason that age would not have withered, or custom not staled, this twenty year old (yet somehow jaded) stage actor?

I propose that this is a poetic inversion of the S2E1 cold open, wherein the Starmaker, looking out upon creation, says: “Look at you, you’re gorgeous!” and Aziraphale erroneously thinks the statement was directed at him. Here, even though Crowley isn’t looking at Aziraphale, I believe that Crowley is actually talking about Aziraphale when he delivers that iconic line. Unlike Burbage, Aziraphale is old, very, very old, and we know that he has a penchant for custom, wearing the same clothes and listening to the same music for century upon century. Yet here is this precious angel being a cheerful little peanut gallery of one, continuing to surprise the demon after all this time. Neither age nor custom has staled Aziraphale’s infinite variety.

When Shakespeare commits the line to a play written 1606-1607, a few years after this event, Crowley will recognize his own sentiment about Aziraphale issuing from Antony’s mouth about Cleopatra. The actual historical events will not have left much of an impression, but the immortalization of his own admiration of the angel in human romantic fiction will have.

It must be mentioned that Antony & Cleopatra is a tragedy, where the star-crossed lovers are kept apart by warring factions that demand loyalty to the state at the preclusion of each other.

There are also some (as far as I can tell) nearly copy-paste plot points from Romeo & Juliet about a misunderstood faked suicide followed by actual suicide and the lovers dying in each others’ arms. It does not have a happy ending. Anthony Crowley deliberately choosing his “Christian name” from this play embodies not only his deep love but his hopelessness that he can ever get the happily ever after he desires.

In Summary

Crowley was an admirer, in one respect or another, of Mark Anthony, though he relied more heavily on Shakespeare’s portrayal and reimagining of the character than Aziraphale gives due credit. Nevertheless, the difference…

Wait a minute…

What’s that?

Is that…

A piece of canon evidence that completely undermines my argument??

This screenshot will only be visible to Tumblr users (sorry Ao3), but at some point we get a good look at the Mona Lisa sketch that Crowley has hanging in his apartment. It is signed (translated from Italian) “To my friend Anthony from your friend Leo da V.”

The problem with this is, the Mona Lisa was painted 100 years before Shakespeare penned Antony & Cleopatra.

However, Neil Gaiman reblogged this transcription and translation, posing the hypothetical, “I wonder if Crowley knows what the A in A.Z. Fell stands for.”

Could it be that the Notorious NRG is jerking us around and sending us on wild goose chases? Absolutely a possibility. But. Let’s give a little grace for a moment, and assume that this comment was made in good faith. A bold assumption, I know. But humor me.

We know that Crowley and Aziraphale both knew Jane Austen, but from completely different perspectives. It stands to reason that Crowley knew da Vinci the scientist, but that Antonio Fell knew Leo da V., an artist with a heart that yearned for an unavailable lover. I’m just making wild conjecture that Lisa Gherardini (aka Mona Lisa), the wife of Florentine cloth merchant Francesco del Giocondo, was a love interest of da Vinci, but it could be true in the GO universe and would make for a great story.

Aziraphale also collects signed items from famous people; the inscribed books of Professor Hoffman to a wonderful student, and the S.W. Erdnase book, signed with his real name, come to mind. The Mona Lisa draft fits in much better with that collection of souvenirs than with anything in Crowley’s apartment. So it stands to reason that it could actually be addressed to Aziraphale.

There remains the question of how or why Crowley has it, but I won’t subject that to speculation here. All to say. Neil Gaiman’s implication-by-redirect is… possible. So let’s assume that it is the case, just for a moment.

If the Mona Lisa sketch is signed to “Antonio” Fell, then this allows the above theory regarding Crowley’s self-naming to remain intact. But it brings up a few questions regarding Aziraphale, not the least of which is: why did he name himself Antonio/Anthony?

Part 3: Saint Anthony of Padua

Anthony was the chosen name of a Portuguese monk, taken upon joining the Fransican order. Anthony rose to prominence in the 13th century as a celebrated orator, delivering impassioned and eloquent sermons. He is also associated with some fish symbolism, since he preached at the shore and fish gathered to listen. He was, incidentally, a lover of books:

Anthony had a book of psalms that contained notes and comments to help when teaching students and, in a time when a printing press was not yet invented, he greatly valued it.

When a novice decided to leave the hermitage, he stole Anthony's valuable book. When Anthony discovered it was missing, he prayed it would be found or returned to him. The thief did return the book and in an extra step returned to the Order as well.

The book is said to be preserved in the Franciscan friary in Bologna today. [source: https://www.catholic.org/saints/saint.php?saint_id=24]

This miraculous incident, wherein the thief not only returns a valuable book but also has a change of heart and returns to the bosom of organized religion, smacks of angelic intervention. But that is neither here nor there. 

Saint Anthony is the Patron Saint of the Lost, and is prayed to by those seeking to recover lost things. What is “lost” in this context is usually an item, rather than a person or an intangible concept, however he is also “credited with many miracles involving lost people, lost things and even lost spiritual goods,” such as faith. [Edit: @tsilvy helpfully contributes that "Here in Italy Sant'Antonio is commonly not just the saint patron of lost things, but, maybe primarily, the saint patron of lost *causes*."] He died at the age of 35, and in artwork is typically depicted with a book and the Infant Child Jesus.

It’s a defensible position that the thing that gives Aziraphale the most consternation across the millennia is Crowley’s loss of his angelic status, and it could even be framed such that Aziraphale does not consider Crowley actually fallen, but rather simply lost. It is a fact that he finds difficult to reconcile and, depending on your reading of the Final Fifteen, the offer to restore Crowley’s angelic status is one that is so pivotal to resolving his internal conflict that he cannot refuse. If this conflict is so central for Aziraphale, perhaps he did name himself after a booklover and the patron saint of lost things, hoping that the name would carry with it some of the power of the blessing, and return Crowley to the light, and in turn, to him.

But wait.

Because I googled “St Anthony” to look for some images and….

St. Anthony of the Desert

I shit you not there are multiple St. Antonies and we’re going to talk about another one of them with respect to Aziraphale because this guy is bonkers. The story traces to the Vitae Patrum, yet another fringe biblical text and I cannot even get a quick answer on whether it is canon or apocrypha because it’s so fringe. Anyways. I think the best way to explain St. Anthony of the Desert comes from the wikipedia page on the Desert Fathers: 

Sometime around AD 270, Anthony heard a Sunday sermon stating that perfection could be achieved by selling all of one's possessions, giving the proceeds to the poor, and following Jesus. He followed the advice and made the further step of moving deep into the desert to seek complete solitude.

[He] became known as both the father and founder of desert monasticism. By the time Anthony had died in AD 356, thousands of monks and nuns had been drawn to living in the desert following Anthony's example, leading his biographer, Athanasius of Alexandria, to write that "the desert had become a city." The Desert Fathers had a major influence on the development of Christianity.

Let’s all agree that this guy is not Aziraphale; this whole becoming an ascetic and living alone in the middle of a desert thing? Not his cuppertea. But St. Anthony is interesting not just for his decision to go into the desert, but what happened when he got there.

The Torment of St Anthony is a 15th century painting commonly attributed to Michaelangelo. It depicts demons crawling all over and attacking a hermit.

But the first round of demons are scraping the bottom of the barrel, practically the damned. Anthony’s journey continues and he meets another demon. Actually he meets two; a centaur, who is not very helpful, and then a satyr who is. It is much easier to find paintings of St. Anthony and the Centaur than of St. Anthony and the Satyr, so you don’t get an image, but I find the satyr to be a much more interesting character, so you get that story instead:

Anthony found next the satyr, "a manikin with hooked snout, horned forehead, and extremities like goats's feet." This creature was peaceful and offered him fruits, and when Anthony asked who he was, the satyr replied, "I'm a mortal being and one of those inhabitants of the desert whom the Gentiles, deluded by various forms of error, worship under the names of Fauns, Satyrs, and Incubi. I am sent to represent my tribe. We pray you in our behalf to entreat the favor of your Lord and ours, who, we have learnt, came once to save the world, and 'whose sound has gone forth into all the earth.'" Upon hearing this, Anthony was overjoyed and rejoiced over the glory of Christ. He condemned the city of Alexandria for worshiping monsters instead of God while beasts like the satyr spoke about Christ.

St. Anthony, then, is entreated by a demon to ask forgiveness from God upon the demons, and St. Anthony, seemingly, agrees to do it. He’s overjoyed to ask God to forgive demons. In connection to my analysis of the origins of the Metatron, and how Aziraphale and Crowley’s potential beef with him is that, as a human put in the exact same situation, he did the opposite, refusing to take the demon’s petition for mercy to God but instead taking it upon himself to confirm their unforgivability (yes that’s a word now) and damnation.

That seems like it would be pretty important to Aziraphale.

In Summary

I give up. I have no idea what’s going on with this show anymore. Here are two options each for both of our ineffable husbands to have given themselves the same God-blessed/damned name. You guys tell me what you think, I just have a pile of evidence and no spoons to evaluate it. 

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens meta #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #anthony j crowley

[everlastlady]

Dating Mammon HCS

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✰- Author's Note:Hi! I'm laying in my bed and still have Mammon brainrot so here is some dating Mammon head canons. I have said this before but I love and hate Mammon. He's such a greedy bitch but also an interesting character now I have two Australian characters I love Mammon from Helluva Boss and Junkrat from Overwatch. Now this was going to be Mammon and Asmodeus dating hcs but I decided to give Mammon the spotlight but if you guys want Asmodeus to be added in the next hcs just let me know I hope that you guys enjoy these hcs! Remember to eat a meal or a snack, drink some water, get some fresh air, take your medicine, and remember that you are loved. If you loved this story remember to comment, click or tap that heart button, reblog with tags, and blaze if you can. Always remember to support your local writers. ♡♡♡

✰- Story Contains: Boyfriend Mammon, Spoiled Reader, Gn Reader, Fluff, & Overall Sweet Things.

✰- Posted: 11/2/2023

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✧- Dating the king of greed comes with it's perks and a lot of gifts. Everyday Mammon gets you a gift, either one gift or sometimes you a ton of gifts. Mammon never gets you anything cheaped. Only the highest quality for his sweetheart for his gem. Mammon never ever wants you to feel like he doesn't pay attention so he always showers you in a ton of attention. He also doesn't shut up about you, always bragging about you while in meetings or with his personal fizz robots. " (Y/N) is so fucking cute. If I could I would make a doll of them and sell them! But I don't want people to have a doll version of my partner, I could make one and keep it to myself. " Mammon eventually does make a little doll version of you and shows it to you. He also made a doll version of him for you to sleep with if you ever get lonely. Now the cutest thing about these dolls are that the little patches on the hands stick together so you can make them hug or hold hands. " (Y/N) let's make them hold hands while we hold hands! " Mammon. Loves to hold your hand while you two are out and about. You never have to worry about him having to let go of your hand because he has to do something.

✧- Matching outfits is something that Mammon loves to do with you. The green or white outfits is something you both go with. Don't every worry about getting made fun of wearing matching outfits with Mammon because he'll crush anyone who dares mock you or him. If it's a demon lord like him. He'll tell you to ignore them that they are just jealous. " We look amazing, ignore them. " Mammon is a busy man, always making money and exploiting people. But he will always make it up with gifts, dinners, or a special night with him in bed~ You know what Mammon does and you don't get involved in his work. You also don't have to work because the king of greed is your boyfriend. But you still like going out and helping out which Mammon always wonders why do you volunteer if you aren't getting anything out of it. But he now sees that you just have a kind heart; how are you in Hell!?

✧ - Even with happy and healthy relationships sometimes you will have disagreements with your partners and get into arguments it just happens in relationships. But the arguments you and Mammon usually get in aren't that bad. Sometimes the arguments could be about Mammon always running late for dates or when you mishear him. Mammon will feel bad about arguing with you and will apologize if he's in the wrong, he'll buy you a gift and talk with you. Now if you are in the wrong and apologize; of course Mammon will forgive you. You both will hug it out and continue your relationship. " I'm sorry that I snapped at you babe, I love you, let's go out to eat and have some good old fun. " Mammon also loves playing his guitar for you, he also doesn't mind if you play his guitar. If you don't know how to play that's fine he'll teach you. He honestly just loves playing music with you.

✧ - No matter if you are skinny or plus size. Mammon loves you no matter what shape your body is. He doesn't like seeing you shame yourself or talk negative about any part of your body. " Babe, come on, you are beautiful just the way you are. " He kisses your stomach, head, nose, and shoulder. If anyone says anything negative about you then... their dead just turned into ashes. Mammon doesn't want you to change anything about yourself of course if it's for health related reasons then he understands. But he never wants you to feel like that you need to eat less or more to look perfect for him because he loves you for you. Mammon will always playful pinch at different parts of your body or tickle you. " One time (Y/N) accidentally knocked me out because I tickled them and all I remember is seeing their foot and then darkness. " Mammon said to Bee who laughed up a storm.

✧ - Despite his bad blood between Fizzarolli and Asmodeus. The lord of lust and the clown jester don't hate you. But they wonder how Mammon got someone like you. They don't know if you are insane or Mammon has you under some love spell. But Asmodeus can clearly see that you love Mammon and that Mammon loves you. Good, someone needs to keep that green motherfucker in check, which you do. You always remind Mammon not to be so harsh on his clients or calm him down before he can turn into a large spider. Speaking of his large form. Mammon has picked you up in his large form a lot, you are so tiny in his hands. You always place a kiss on his check which calms him down. " Sorry that I exploded, they made me so mad. " Mammon would either change back or carry you back him.

✧ - Mammon loves when you sleep on top of him. He thinks you look adorable, so usually in bed you sleep on top of him. His four arms wrapped around you. It's usually his bed or his web. The web is usually used for naps though so a lot of his workers or clients have walked in on you two napping or cuddling which upsets him because he was having a comfortable moment with you. " Get the fuck out! " Mammon would look down to see you still asleep after yelling at a worker or client. You are the only person to have seen Mon without his jester looking outfit. " I'm not sure why everyone always assumes or assumed I'll be in a business suit. Maybe I should put one on to surprise people, anyway (Y/N) give me back my outfit, you look adorable but I have to go soon. " Mammon did eventually get a version of his outfit for you. " You look a little like me but you aren't becoming a greed lord. "

✧ - A lot of vacations for you both. Very expensive vacations that people wish that they were Mammon's partner. He gets you guys the best hotel rooms, the spas are always amazing, and makes sure that you two have lovely dinners. " (Y/N)! Come help me build a sand castle! " Mammon would drag you to go build a sandcastle with you. Mammon has so many vacation pictures and videos with. Mammon plans these vacations by having you throw knives at a spinning wheel. It's like a fun circus game! A lot of times you do try to land on some where you think looks great.

✧ - Now as far as the human world goes. You have visited the human world with Mammon. Human disguises are something Mammon could easily do for you both. Now the two of you only visit the human world because Mammon wants to mess with the humans. You two even have a home in the human world. Mammon usually causes a lot of businesses to crash, friendships to end, or a lot of war to happen because of those falling for his greed. Whenever you visit the human world. You always bring something back. " (Y/N) what's that? Oh a switch.... I want one :( " And now Mammon has a switch, Mammon finds your human form also beautiful. " Shit babe even as a human, you look fucking delicious. " Of course you also think Mammon looks handsome in his humans form.

#helluva boss #hazbin hotel #helluva mammon x reader #helluva mammon #helluva mammon x gn reader #helluva x reader #helluva x gn reader #helluva fanfiction #helluva fandom #helluva mammon hcs #everlasting writes🪻

[bonefall]

Has firestar even said anything about the way bramblestar acts in the books? especially to his own *daughter?* (squilf) I feel like he should have come down from heaven and tell bramblestar to stop being such an ass

The books 100% do not see Bramblestar as even slightly flawed. His nobility is utterly uncontested in-canon, even characters from other Clans bend over backwards to say that he's an incredible, amazing leader.

The few times that anyone has said anything bad about him, mostly from Onestar, they were once again targeting his blood relationship to Tigerstar. Actual character flaws or real personality traits are not addressed.

Which is a huge shame, because he's actually very consistent imo. One of the best characterized in the series, if you can cut past the narration and just look at his actions.

Awful self-esteem; most of his abuse and bad choices stem from moments where he feels like he's losing respect, causing him to try and take control back. This expresses as jealousy, self-pity, or anger. Note how much of his language has to do with "trust" and "support" in Squilf's Hope. Ashfur exploited this flaw to butter him up with ingratiating compliments, so he could continue to abuse Lionpaw freely.

Stubborn; when he makes a choice, he almost never changes his mind on his own. He often has to have bad ideas shouted out of him over several arguments, and gently appeasing him NEVER works. He'll even let others, like Leafpool, take the fall for him so he won't have to admit wrongdoing.

Oblivious; does not easily understand the feelings and motivations of others. Though he can be compassionate at times, he is a bad judge of character and cannot "get outside of his own head" to try and understand WHY others are acting a certain way, or his impact on others. Examples: not realizing Hawkfrost had nothing in common with him, that Squilf took her sister's kits because she loved her, how disowning his children was hurting Lionblaze, etc.

So, Firestar has never said anything bad about his successor. The authors don't think there is anything TO say. The only time they rolled out Firestar to say anything was in the latest field guide where they made him suck Clear Sky's toes and whine about how the audience doesn't like the sad, misunderstood child abuser who moonlights in eyeball gouging

[gotylocks]

Willow Month 2023: Day 2- Favorite Relationship

If you read my day 1 entry, this will be similarly unsurprising. Obviously Kit and Jade are my favorite relationship on the show. From the first moment Jade flicked her eyes down to Kit's lips, I knew I was going to ship them regardless if it was canon or not.

Thankfully, I didn't have to wait long to have my feelings confirmed by the show itself. I adored how their relationship was built. The foundation of inseparable best friends ("For Kit and only Kit", "I can't do this without you") gives way effortlessly to the clear, overwhelming, yet buried love and desire they have for each other.

One of the most fascinating things about them is while most stories (especially mainstream) will build both romantic and sexual tension in a queer relationships by keeping them apart. Willow really said "What if the tension comes from them kissing immediately and then not being able to unpack that till way later?" It makes their every interaction have this hidden weight to it, whether they're just joking around around the rest of the crew (almost trying to pretend they're "just good friends" so nobody suspects anything, which Boorman clocked day 1) or they're having an argument as if having that tension bottled up is rippling and causing easy discussions to be fights (specifically thinking about the Wildwood).

For Kit's brashness and bad attitude with everyone else, when it comes to Jade, she acts so differently. Where she holds grudges a lot, Jade admitting she had been lying to her about training results in Kit pouting, sure, but in the immediate aftermath of the Battle of the Slaughtered Lamb it's like she has already processed it. Instead, she is in full "Comfort Jade" mode, which continues into Nockmaar.

Jade's statement "Who protects Kit? I do." in the finale hits me so hard because it doesn't come off as Kit is a damsel always needed to be saved. Instead, it has the feeling of "She is my partner and we need each other. We keep each other safe. We look out for each other." When they're separated, they're capable, but they're better together. They're better together because they push each other to be better after the training lie is revealed. There are so many moments where they deal with the exact baggage they need to in order to be in a romantic relationship together.

This can be individual baggage like Kit's anxiety about her connection to Bavmorda or Jade's discovery of her heritage; or it can be shared baggage like learning Kit's dad killed Jade's. At each step, they go through these huge moments that could have massive ramifications in their lives, they deal with them, and they look at each other like "As long as we're together, we can get through anything."

I also think about how at no point does Kit lash out at Jade for pulling her away from her father, as all of that anger is directed at Elora (despite Jade being the one that physically restrained and removed her from the Tomb). This ties back into that feeling that they protect each other. She doesn't blame Jade because she's her partner, she had no choice but to protect her, whereas Elora had no responsibility to save her, which also is a big moment that sets up their connection later (but that's another essay).

The trust Jade shows Kit at the end of episode 7 ("I think you're going to make that decision on your own") hits me so hard because it is this clear feeling of growth on both their parts. It's Jade taking her hands off the wheel and making it more of an equal partnership between them, where up to now, she's often had to be the voice of reason to rein in Kit's poor decision making.

"When you love someone, and they need you, yes, you jump off the edge of the world to go and get them."

I've made the joke that Kit and Jade made me believe in love again, but it's true. Their connection, support, friendship, deep attraction, and overwhelming love for each other felt so vivid, so real, so beautiful, there are painfully few relationships that live in my heart and mind like Kit and Jade.

Oh and they had the two most intimate and beautiful kiss scenes I've seen in ages, if not ever.

#willowmonth2023 #willow 2022 #kit tanthalos #jade claymore #tanthamore #kit x jade #ruby cruz #erin kellyman

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

On Renesmee’s stunted growth and the Cullen’s wondering whether it’s about the diet, curious as to how each Cullen views the situation. Is there anyone advocating for her to try human blood?

The post anon's referencing.

Oh boy, and yes, I imagine it's a matter of hot debate (which is why I cut the post off short before we could get into it.

Alice

Alice doesn't really care but mostly she's miffed that she can't see what will happen either way. Everyone's bickering and Alice feels pressure on her to predict her way out when she's 0 help here. She can't see if Renesmee will eventually die, if she's just stuck like this, if she'll grow older eventually, nothing.

She can't even predict which decision will make the family happiest. I imagine she votes animal blood because it's the most likely thing to keep the Cullens intact. The human diet just isn't sustainable even for one person and the Cullens would have to split in half over it.

Alice is against family splitting in half.

Bella

Get her the blood.

They can use blood donations again! Just because Renesmee needs blood doesn't mean she has to become a murderer/not be a Cullen anymore. And more importantly, how can they sacrifice Renesmee's health for an esoteric belief? It's one thing for the rest of them, where the only consequence is being a little weaker, Renesmee might die/is stuck like this.

If they don't want to steal from hospitals, fine, they can set up a fake blood drive/charity with Alice's money. They'll get humans to donate right there in a truck and then Renesmee can eat it fresh.

Bella fails to see why this is even a matter of debate and judges the Cullens strongly for talking about this at all.

Carlisle

As in most things canonically, Carlisle is team "you decide but there will be consequences". He likely lays out that yes, this may have stunted Renesmee's growth, she may even die young because of this, however it's her choice to make if she's willing to live with this for the sake of not eating people.

Most importantly, if she eats people, she can't stay. Eating blood donations is not sustainable at all and even if it was would be noticed. People would still die if those are stolen frequently enough to feed Renesmee. She would have to eat people, actual people, which means she can't stay.

Naturally, this ultimatum throws the family into chaos, and everyone's very upset by it, but them's the breaks.

Edward

Edward's torn. On the one hand, this is not good for Renesmee's health and growth, but on the other hand he can't support not being on the diet even for his daughter. More, if it comes to leaving the family... he can't leave the family.

As Bella's looking increasingly like she'll abscond with Renesmee to feed her people out of spite Edward finds himself more and more stressed as he has to choose between his beloved family and his other beloved family.

Edward tries to play both sides, this goes poorly.

Emmett

As always, Emmett's staying out of this one/taking whichever side Rosalie's taking. Privately, he thinks they should probably just feed the girl blood. Maybe send her to the Irish or something to look after and the family can visit from time to time. She'd be happy there.

Esme

Esme's siding with Bella. She doesn't see why they should be harming the family, doing this horrible thing to this girl, when there are solutions. They can make this work, they always do, and they can't kick Renesmee out for something that's not her fault.

Jasper

Jasper's also staying out of this one but also doesn't really have an opinion/is a bit torn. On the one hand, yeah, this might kill Renesmee. But on the other hand, sometimes life is miserable and you're born a vampire and it's better to die young and in pain than live the life of a murderer.

I imagine him feeling this is a choice Renesmee has to make for herself.

Renesmee

Renesmee doesn't know what's even happening. She's that dog in space.

I imagine she voices she'd rather stay on the diet, as then this argument can be avoided, and she doesn't become the family freak and the one who couldn't hack it.

No one listens to her.

Rosalie

Oh Hell no.

Renesmee's getting the blood. People die all the time, it happens, and there are lots of people who deserve to die for that matter. Are they going to watch Renesmee waste away, for something she can't help, just so they can feel morally superior?

(Yes, this is at odds with Rosalie's firm conviction to remain on the diet and judgement of those who cannot, but I imagine as with other canon events this would skew Rosalie's priorities a bit.)

#twilight #twilight meta #twilight headcanon #twilight renaissance #the cullens #alice cullen #bella swan #carlisle cullen #edward cullen #emmett cullen #esme cullen #jasper whitlock #rosalie hale #renesmee cullen #meta #headcanon #opinion

[jadeylovesmarvelxo]

Should have known.

Summary; A fight between Eddie and yn leads to a much longed for realization.

Warnings; Angsty, fighting, fluff, not s4 canon.

Likes or comments are always appreciated.

I don't give anyone permission to copy my work.

"You are the best thing that's ever been mine" Taylor Swift- Mine.

💞💞

It was the worst fight she and Eddie had had in a long time.

After being friends for so long, listening to him talk about the girls he had been with, perfect girls that weren't her, she couldn't ignore the ache in her heart anymore.

Especially when Eddie announced he was going on a date with none other than Chrissy Cunningham.

The two had grown close after Chrissy had come to him for some weed to take the stresses of an already tough senior year.

He had decided that he was going to ask her out and when Chrissy had said yes he had come rushing over to her house to share the good news, there was the biggest smile on his face and of course, she was happy because he was happy and he deserved all the happiness in the world.

But did it still break her heart that he would never smile like that for her? Never want to be with her? Absolutely.

Eddie noticed the split second her face crumpled even though she tried her hardest to be happy, he must have recognized the hitch in her voice because he frowned and stepped back enquiring what was wrong and why she was annoyed about his date with Chrissy.

That's when the argument started and now she was alone, in tears, nursing a broken heart.

"Some friend you are"

He said that she never supported him when he dated someone or liked someone and he wanted to know why.

How could she tell him it was because she loved him? Hear his rejection? All the ways he liked Chrissy because she was prettier?

Well, he wouldn't say that but she knew it was true. So she kept quiet and he looked so upset, said those cutting words.

Hurt she lashed out.

"All I do is support you Eddie, you have no fucking idea. If I'm such a bad friend to you then I won't be one"

It was stupid, thoughtless, fueled by jealousy and years of pent-up emotions letting loose, she immediately regretted it but by then he left slamming the door.

She tried to follow him but he was gone so fast. Guilt ate her up inside and she wished she could take those words back.

Wished there was some magic spell that could make her fall out of love with him so that an argument like this would have never happened.

💞💞

Eddie hasn't been able to focus much the last few days. Since his fight with yn there's been a constant ache in his chest.

Not even the thought of his second date with Chrissy perks him up much and after all the shy flirting and hanging out he finds that this date is as awkward as the first.

On that date, he assumed it was just nerves but now it had happened again.

He and Chrissy got on great, the two of them could talk for hours. That's not the issue. Chrissy was pretty and sweet but something wasn't clicking and he wasn't the only one who noticed.

At first, he thought it was maybe his fight with yn. Maybe if he made up with her then that would help? It took him all of five minutes to realize it wasn't that at all.

Then they kissed and it was nice but it still didn't feel right.

Slowly he realized that he liked Chrissy as a friend very much but that was all and now he felt very stupid.

Chrissy had come to that realization too and was the first to mention it.

"Do you think the reason this is so awkward is that we like each other as friends, that's all, and didn't realize it?" he nods feeling relief that she feels the same.

The curious thing is that he has felt like this before with the girls he has been with and he preffered being with yn.

Because she was his best friend. That was the reason right?

"Eddie, I think you know why this isn't working out? It's about yn right?" he explained about the fight so he assumes she means that.

"Maybe, I really should talk to her about the fight" Chrissy softens.

"You misunderstand. The reason it's not worked out with me or any other girl is that we aren't her"

He knows what she's trying to hint at and shakes his head.

"No. She's my best friend Chrissy, we... I'm not in love with her or some shit like that" he hasn't even been in love yet and surely he would know if he was in love with his best friend?

"Do you find yourself thinking about her all the time? Especially when she isn't around?"

He nods.

"Yeah but that's just friendly right?" she raises her eyebrow.

"Do you miss her when she isn't around? Like now with your fight? Is she the first thing you think about in the morning and the last thing you think about at night?"

Nodding he answers her.

"Yes," shit... his brain was going into overdrive and Chrissy smiles triumphantly.

"Do you ever think about what it would be like to kiss her? Be with her romantically?" he rests his head in his hands as the truth hits him right in the face.

How the fuck did he not know?

"Yes, shit..."

"Yeah, I think you're in love Eddie. It's pretty much how I feel about Jason" he decides not to comment on that. As much as he liked Chrissy and wanted to be her friend he would never understand why she liked Jason.

On to more pressing matters is the fact he needs to talk to yn more than ever now.

💞💞

After three days of her and Eddie not speaking she missed him like crazy. Many a time she wanted to go up and talk things out with him but didn't know what to say.

Mostly she was nervous that he may have just decided he didn't want to be her friend anymore after the stupid thing she said.

Hawkins High was officially on Christmas break and she should be with Eddie binging on popcorn and watching Holiday movies.

Feeling angsty she decides to drive to his to talk to him but is stunned when all of a sudden Eddie is in her bedroom.

"Hi, your folks let me in" she nods feeling nervous anxiety at seeing him face to face.

What does she say to him.

"Eddie...I" he speaks before she can get the words out.

"You're not Chrissy" he blurts out and the words crack her already broken heart.

"I'm well aware of that Eddie" she tells him quietly and he swears.

"Shit, I mean. Chrissy isn't you" she is still hurt and a little confused.

"Look, Eddie. I'm sorry for what I said. I should be supportive of your dates. I am. I'm sorry if it seemed like I wasn't, I am so sorry about what I said"

"I'm sorry for what I said to princess. When I said Chrissy isn't you, I meant that our dates were awkward, they didn't work out and we like each other as friends, none of my dates work out and it's because the girls aren't you"

Okay. This she was not expecting at all. At first, she assumes this is some sort of daydream.

Shit has she zoned out and is drooling or something? It isn't until Eddie cups her cheek, that her heart starts racing that she realizes it's no dream.

"Chrissy helped me see that you're all I think about. From when I wake up to when I go to sleep, I get excited at the thought of seeing you and can't believe how beautiful you are, how sweet and kind you are, I can't believe how lucky I am to have you"

It's like she knows deep down what he is going to say but the tears, happy tears still come.

"You are the best thing that's ever been mine. I'm in love with you" he tells her while stroking her cheek.

"I hope you feel the same otherwise I have made myself out to be a complete butthead" he jokes but looks a little anxious and that causes her to press her lips to his.

With each kiss and under the twinkle of the fairy lights on her ceiling she tells him.

"I love you"

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson angst #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x reader fluff #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n

[awhimproned]

"you don't actually want the thing you think you want", a nandermo retrospective

In this post of mine deep diving into the decision of guillermo staying human, I said I wanted to make a nandermo analysis at one point. I absolutely have no self-control so I immediately started working on it. So, welcome. This is it.

This post will attempt to analyze in depth two implications of the infamous quote from above by Yana Gorskaya:

It’s shipbaiting and we’ve got a storm coming

It’s slowburn and the importance of recognizing toxic dynamics even when enjoying the drama and the potential

The quote comes from this interview question right here:

It can be interpreted in a lot of ways and directions, the most prominent one being “and they were platonic all along. trust us you dont want them together” — it leaves a very bad taste in my mouth because I can see the showrunners dangling a carrot in front of a target audience until the finish line. Especially when one of the directors herself says and proves outright that nandor and guillermo have been framed romantically on purpose just by having the line “will they won’t they relationship” in the interview.

Keep in mind the admittance of will they won’t they directly out of Yana automatically eliminates the argument that the writers were strictly going for platonic friends. There’s no refusal. No going: yea no we dont know. They wrote nandor and guillermo to be romantic.

From there we have two routes we can take:

1) On the direction that they’re not having nandermo be a thing: This makes everything shipbaiting.

At least it’s not queerbaiting, I hear you say, both characters are queer. I’d argue shipbaiting is worse in this situation, because in this frame, it rather looks like the showrunners are using the certain attachment and sentiments of the audience to string people along:

Both of these characters are people of color, one is plus size, both of them queer. If it’s shipbaiting, this kind of alludes to discrimination, I’m afraid. It does not look good on the showrunners/producers’ part (when Taika’s name is attached, too. This man is literally in OFMD. Help)

And you don’t want to be like Jason Rothenberg; beefing with your own fandom, making writing decisons to spite them, kill a lesbian character after exploiting your sapphic audience and be infamous for the worst case of bury your gays, shipbait for seven seasons to hold the largest fandom in the audience to keep your views up, mistreat your POC cast members... etc. God, yeesh.

It’s almost incriminating in that sense, when they stopped floating around the idea of them and made it canon by dropping the “maybe he has feelings for you as well” line in season 3 and while guillermo was disguised as nandor. And have him be bitchy about gail. Everything about s3 told us that guillermo had a thing for nandor.

If nandor and guillermo were intended strictly as just a couple of pals, they could easily shut down the excitement and expectation for the ship, but instead they did those. It was a confirmation more than anything rather than a rebuttal.

But I guess for the shipbaiting case, the “rebuttal” was s4 when Guillermo was in his healing era, Nandor wanted a wife, and they resetted allathat in s3 to practically nothing.

As much as I’m going to use this as an opposition argument in section two, it also is a potential support for shipbaiting case, and that is the repetition of “friends” for nandor&guillermo that started becoming more of a thing in seasons 4&5. Especially s4.

It saw Guillermo outgrowing Nandor for a potential love interest when s3 had the biggest plot twist in their favor ever, it was going somewhere, and then they immediately established not only Guillermo finding a boyfriend in London, but also him having no hard feelings about Nandor wanting to find a wife when we all know how hard he’d taken Gail — and most important of it all, Nandor just wanting a Freddie of his own. It’s really weirdly romantic drama-centric with each of them getting partners & setting up for jealousy, but the writers subvert every trope, and instead do this weird shit with Nandor’s storyline where it’s purely a horror story from Marwa’s POV and he’s a horrible, selfish monster (and I was flabbergasted at the downward spiral his character took) — yet he’s incredibly “generous” to Guillermo because he chose to make his own Freddie rather than take his and let him go in the end, it’s all so very bizarre.

Which makes the shipbait even more outrageous. Because now it’s personal since it has more shipbait moments inbetween that don’t have heterosexual explanations. KEEP IN MIND THEY’RE STILL FRAMED ROMANTICALLY THEY KNOW WHAT THEY’RE DOING AND THE WHOLE THING WITH DEREK IS A WHOLE CHEATING METAPHOR.

The equivalent would be that one scene in Sherlock BBC when irene goes “of course you are [in love with him]” to john and how the show keeps bringing up how other characters think they’re in a relationship and saying it. You never want to be like Sherlock, either. Ugh.

I’ve been in through enough queerbaiting&shipbaiting to know that it could definitely turn out this way, and I’m still half-expecting this to be honest. I’m also a big fan of ofmd and go, but they’re exceptions, not the norm, and as much as wwdits is a wildly revolutionarily queer show, there is enough material for it all to turn out to be nothing.

So, in conclusion: shipbaiting turns out to be worse than it is because it’s on purpose and there’s no salvaging it after the “it was friendship all along ❤️” insistence, there’s receipts and the actors are on board with it. And in a situation like things, there is only one thing to say:

At least we have fanfiction and the actors like the pairing.

2) On the direction that nandermo is a thing: “you don’t know what you’re asking for and you won’t like it if we give it to you right now” dilemma, aka “you don’t actually want the thing you think you want” —

which basically rounds up to yana meaning, if nandor and guillermo were to be a thing right now at this point in their relationship, it would be messy, abusive and toxic [and there are still other plots to explore and directions this pairing could/have to be taken before they become canon.]

“Yeah they are messy, toxic characters, we know what we’re asking for,” I hear you saying. And I say to that, no, you really don’t, and you would end up hating what they did with nandor and guillermo if they became canon before they were true equals. One example of this would be people switching on Olicity (Oliver and Felicity from Green Arrow, wildly popular crackship there was no hope and only the teasing of in the fandom before it became a real thing) after the writers rushed to make them canon and did them very wrong afterwards.

The allure of nandermo is guillermo breaking the status quo and catching nandor slipping by establishing himself as his equal, destroying the power imbalance completely, them standing as individuals with equal power if not guillermo flipping the dynamic upside down and asserting dominance over nandor this time when he was a mere familiar nandor couldn’t care less about before.

This process is still in progress as of season 5 and let me tell you this, them becoming canon during Guillermo’s familiar status would have been downright icky.

This show’s only other canon ship ladja is the most healthy, gomez and morticia-esque thing ever, they’re in love, they’re horny all the time, they are queer, they fuck other people all the time and encourage each other, they’re wildly protective of one another, the man steps up to be a single father of a child he isn’t obligated to look after and he doesnt let it derail his wife’s career or force motherhood onto her, like. Do you really expect they wouldn’t let nandermo cook enough before they are on this level of iconic and healthy before they become a thing?

Nandor wasn’t even able to admit that Guillermo was a friend to him (and to Guillermo’s face) up until season 5. In season 1 he was weirded out by even saying it, in season 4 he could only manage to say “best man” and immediately reverse when the word friend was brought up — “closest companion for 13 years” in the market fight & “i may have killed my friend” muttered to himself before guillermo comes bursting out the door, it’s like he didn’t want to admit out loud that Guillermo became very important to him in a very short amount of time. Half of the pairing consisting of a person who is unable to make it clear and known to the other how important and precious he is just doesn’t sit well in the case they are in a relationship.

And the power imbalance is still there even if you don’t see it or think it’s gone, albeit knocked almost even by “I can kill you if I want to but I don’t” assertiveness from Guillermo.

Because even in season 3 and 4 in instances Guillermo was able to best Nandor in power, he’s still inferior to and is in service of him — because he’s working for something he wants from Nandor, which Nandor of course keeps taking advantage of by treating Guillermo like a subservient familiar (although it keeps getting better as things change more and more) even if in name he’s a bodyguard.

Their relationship is that of employment in name, the nature of it is give-and-take, Guillermo says it himself in s3 Nandor is a boss more than a friend and he would still be have to be “friends” with him because he’s his boss. And let’s be honest, before Nandor really became found family to him and he himself realized that over the seasons, Nandor was a means to an end for Guillermo, he’s “Master”, not “Nandor”.

And from Nandor’s perspective, Guillermo is with him because he wants to be a vampire. Simple as that. It’s what allows Nandor to exploit Guillermo.

Imagine a premature romance happening in these circumstances, it’d be absolutely in abuse territory, you don’t make your significant other do the dirty work for you like that. It’s why boss-employee relationships are most of the times, forbidden in the workplace, because the boss holds some power over the employee and can very much have them do things that they don’t want to do.

Nandor would not be able to see Guillermo as an equal even when there are feelings involved, because I have to remind you, Nandor is a cruel bastard, and it would turn into one of those AITA posts real quick between them when Guillermo is fully in service of Nandor still.

And remember how Nandor treated his “love” Marwa, how fast he dropped her from his life once that “phase” was over, all the things he did to her, she was his significant other — yet he never connected with her, not really, she was just an accessory to him and this was supposed to be “love”; and the other side of the coin, how he keeps self-sabotaging and ignoring his real problem by filling the void with what he thinks is the solution, getting in the way of his own happiness.

This can’t be ideal from Guillermo’s perspective when imagining a relationship with him.

And now, change Guillermo’s gender. Imagine it being a woman who’s going through this. It’s putrid toxic when you think about it like that. And to think “she” would receive Nandor’s respect and equal footing once she became a vampire same as him — uhh... No, please, thank you. It’s less fun and more this is problematic when the tables turn, isn’t it?

Not to mention how open the vampires’ relationships and sex lives are, they are not monogamous. Guillermo is a very repressed and private Catholic, he wouldn’t be able to handle Nandor and Laszlo’s trysts. He has his own journey to go through for him to be also into open relationships because Nandor sure as hell won’t turn monogamous for him, this is wwdits.

Which is why the progress of “work relationship” to “official declaration of friendship” over the course of season 4 & 5 is very important in their dynamic, because it takes things into a more attentive, caring and intimate territory in which both openly care for each other beyond being Master and Familiar. They both grew tremendously as individuals. Guillermo admits he loves Nandor the most, Nandor is finally able to say that Guillermo is his friend and openly do acts of service and somewhat redeem his selfish actions in s4 when he was lashing out making dumb decisions and actively self-sabotaging because he was given the power instead of confronting leftover problems he was repressing from s3.

This solidifies their connection, makes it something undeniable that it affects a vampire who immediately is able to move on from another’s death. You’re shown again and again how they react to death and how insignificant it is to them, yet Nandor is close to tears when he thinks Guillermo is dead, falls to his knees even, and is even more disturbed and outraged when he thinks Laszlo is violating his corpse.

For the first time you see that more than an unhealthy codependency or a symbiotic relationship between a vampire and a slayer bodyguard/familiar, Nandor is emotionally attached to Guillermo.

Like, really attached that he will actually be kind and giving and forgiving — not only did he violate a vampire society taboo to kill a fellow vampire, but also overcame the pride and humiliation because he finally realizes Guillermo is much more important to him and that he actually doesn’t want to kill him when the anger lets up enough for him to see that. (Thank you Patton Oswald for your service)

And we don’t stop there. He accepts him as an equal and invites him to live together in the house, which proves that even when he was a slayer bodyguard Nandor didn’t see him as an equal, and after Guillermo is having problems with the killing side of being a vampire, he doesn’t humiliate or shame Guillermo through this. You‘d think he and the vampires would make fun of him endlessly, but they let Nandor organize this intricate ritual so all of them together can allow Guillermo’s decision to be as authentic and without pressure and shame as possible. You’d think that ritual room was prepared by Guillermo but everything is done by Nandor, so he proves he’s not entirely unable to function as a normal being who can live by himself, he’s just dramatic and likes to be pampered.

If you thought The Roast was an incredibly generous nandermo episode for me to think we collectively hallucinated it like a Goncharov moment, this final episode is downright fanfic. Nandor has never been this nice with Guillermo, EVER.

All of this is done right after Nandor’s official admitting that Guillermo is his friend. This is a crucial step in their relationship for Nandor to consider Guillermo to be more, and Guillermo to question just what they are.

And love can only work where there’s mutual affection and respect for one another. And the writers are gradually working up to achieve that while tackling individual character arcs for nandor and guillermo to get there.

The power imbalance I’m talking about is a thing that exists beyond the powers they hold over the other’s head, it is about what they think of each other as. What Nandor is to Guillermo, and what Guillermo is to Nandor.

They could only become canon without it being toxic is when Nandor can look at Guillermo and think — “This is my friend and not my servant” and when the carrot of vampirism isn’t hanging in front of Guillermo and he’s naturally an actual part of the friend group (so that he wouldn’t be mistreated while he’s Nandor’s partner too.)

And I really don’t think nadja out of nowhere saying “my best friend” about laszlo was a coincidental writing choice.

And we’re nearly there at this point. Mister Nandor nobody can betray me and get away with it the Relentless just let Guillermo get away with it, and not only that, he fixed everything for him. Everything. He didn’t even get jealous that Guillermo had a choice in staying human when he obviously would kill to be human in season 3. He just went “I will fix”. It’s the most selfless thing he did in the entire series and he only got competent and smart when it was Guillermo in question — he wanted to fix the friendship.

And in episode 8, he told Baron Afanas — “whatever Guillermo’s flaws may be [...]”

That suggests Nandor doesn’t see any flaw in Guillermo, and is unaware if they do in fact, exist. He genuinely likes Guillermo, enough to cry and mourn when he thinks him dead, enough to snap at the Baron and defend him until the end, enough to clutch his favorite sweater like a shock blanket. It was this episode that cemented Guillermo as indisposable to Nandor, and the season finale to establish how far Nandor would go and soften himself up (change) if it was for Guillermo’s sake, he’s never been that tender and considerate, ever with Guillermo,

and you could say at that point it could be because they were “equals” as vampires but Nandor knew what he would choose — the focus on his hands when he’s personally dressing guillermo (pride and prejudice hand flex, dont @ me). "don't be nervous we've all been through it" (gentle). "nothing you cannot handle" (encouraging). Making up an intricate ritual so that he wouldn’t feel pressured or stressed or shamed. "you wanna be a human, there's no shame in that". (These vampires clown on EVERYONE) "we're gonna make it happen". "you want me to do it?". "I don't know" "I do". Keeping Guillermo's old or spare glasses in his pocket like it was something he came across while he was destroying Guillermo’s things like some lover scorned and he saved it like it was some keepsake. “I'm sorry, Guillermo. That was the only way for you to figure out what you actually wanted”. The hand on his shoulder to comfort him and the patting. “It was a horrible and hard decision. I think you made the right choice.” (Nandor himself would have killed derek in a heartbeat if it was his decision to return to being a human, but he still spared Guillermo’s feelings because he knows how hard it was for Guillermo. Since when is Nandor considerate about another person’s feelings? Guillermo is special.)

He was so very unexpectedly gentle and he’s never ever been that way and I am still in shock about his honesty and the effort he’s put into helping. This was the biggest gift he could have given Guillermo, not the vampirism, but a way out of it when he didnt want it anymore, a choice. And he wouldnt have done that if he didnt deeply care for Guillermo —

And with that, we’re almost out of the toxicity zone into a yet new dynamic with them, one that isn’t about who’s dominant and who’s submissive, but them finally being able to stand on equal ground, if Guillermo isn’t asking for vampirism from Nandor anymore and isn’t implicitly going back to being his familiar.

If they’re going towards a romantic relationship, this was an important border to cross and a topic finally handled the way it needs to be addressed. The one thing that’s causing a chain of command in their relationship is gone. And anything can happen. Anything.

I don’t believe that line about cleaning up Derek’s body was meant to imply Guillermo was back to being a familiar for Nandor and that we are back to square one. His phrasing was extremely polite — “Now if you wouldn’t mind cleaning up Derek’s corpse before sunrise that would be great”. That’s not an order. Derek is Guillermo’s mess, so he has to handle it himself, it’s like saying “I’ve done all this and I even killed him for you, and the rest is yours to deal with,” — it’s like saying “I cooked, you do the dishes”, and Nandor is giving him space to deal with his decision, hell, he didn’t even tell Guillermo to clean everything else like he normally would, now that would suggest back to the status quo.

Season 5 was fucking HUGE for nandermo and all of guillermo’s dynamics with everyone. It still feels like a fever dream to be honest. They really went and got rid of what was clogging up the progress of their relationship. They’re just. Happening naturally. It’s a slowburn if it’s meant to happen eventually and the writers are being really careful with doing things in the right way for it to not become toxic.

You just gotta have some faith in the team and wait for it.

In conclusion: Yes fucked up relationships are fun. until it’s canon and people are making discourse on the internet about how abusive it really is when it could have been handled better. The ross and rachel-ification of nandermo is the last thing we need.

There’s definitely things I’ve missed because im purely making this post on mobile and it’s not as coherent as I’d like it to be, if I have, please don’t hesitate to tell me.

#nandermo #guillermo de la cruz #nandor the relentless #wwdits meta #wwdits #what we do in the shadows #wwdits s5 #wwdits spoilers #wwdits season 5

[meidnightrain]

I WISH YOU WOULD - navia

❝ two a.m., here we are. see your face, hear my voice in the dark. ❞

summary: after a misunderstanding with your best friend,the head of spina de rosula, you both realise that you rather have constant quarrels than be apart

warnings: reader is gn, arguments, implied crush on navia

notes: day 7! whoa i feel like i just started this event yesterday haha, with fontaine’s archon quest coming to a close tomorrow, let’s see how the canon story progresses and if i can incorporate it into my event;)

taglist (open): @staretes , @rynnlvrs , @sentifua , @i-probably-sleep-too-much , @reilly34 , @qqingque , @akutasoda , @mhiieee , @starryshinyskies , @rintosae , @kazemiya

tick tick tick. its two am now the clock whispered to you, the hand pointing at the bolder number engraved in its metal circle. was it normal to be kept up by such thoughts running circles in your head, like leaving a gramophone on loop to play the same songs over and over again in an endless cycle? thoughts at two in the morning are normal, that’s what navia liked to say.

you stifled a groan, hiding your face under your cushion, taking a deep breath and willing yourself to clear your mind off all distractions. headlights of a patrolling gardemek passed the windowpane, and all you could think of was navia and what you had said to her last.

you both had a quarrel the other day over the missing persons case, she had been upset at you for not supporting her but you had been upset at her for not being more careful and reckless. she was your best friend after all but she drove you mad, always knowing how to push your buttons.

she was headstrong after all, one of the qualities you loved about her…not that you could tell it to her face anyway. to be honest lying down and staring at the ceiling, wishing for what ifs and what nots wasn’t doing you any good you soon realised.

the good thing about fontaine was that it was safe to roam around at night with gardemeks at every turn. it was the nation of justice after all, who was in the right mind to do illegal activities when a judgement from the oratrice mechanique d’analyse cardinale could be more severe than a death sentence.

walking down the streets you used to roam with navia, you couldn’t help but reminisce the times you had spent with her. you missed her too much that you weren’t mad anymore at this point. you wished that you could both go back and remember what the both of you fought for.

you grumbled, shaking your head frantically and slapping both your cheeks. “get a grip on yourself name! you need to stop thinking of her! it’s not like she’s going to pop out of thin air-“

“name?” a voice that you could recognise from anywhere calls out to you from across the empty court. you froze instantaneously, willing yourself to move faster away from her but you were rooted to the spot. you turned to face a hopeful navia, alone without her bodyguards for once.

clearing your throat, you nodded at her with what you hoped was a blank stare…that was until you realised that you were grinning like an idiot in love. curse this stupid feelings which betrayed you so, especially when you depended on them the most.

“i’m sorry!” is what comes out both your mouths at the same time, the awkward tension between you breaking after the words take a moment to sink in. your shoulders relax ever so slightly as navia moved closer to you, what looks like regret laced in her usual features.

the both of you were a crooked love in a straight line down. weird cause that would naturally want to make you run and hide but then again, it made the both of you turn back right around.

best friend or no, argument or no, one thing was for sure that nothing could ever separate the both of you. you had wished that she was right here, wished that it was all good and celestia had heard your prayer.

now you had to make sure you wouldn’t make the smart mistake of letting her go again, wishing that she knew that you would never forget her as long as you lived.

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#🕊️ - 1989 event #・ nouveau livre ˎˊ˗ #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x you #genshin x you #genshin impact x gn reader #genshin x gn reader #genshin impact x gender neutral reader #genshin x gender neutral reader #navia x reader #navia x you #🗞️ - genshin impact fics #🪧 - event: 1989