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#i even read some of the cheating fics and i hate those!!!
starillusion13 · 1 month
Note
Hi! Your fics are so good! specially the ot8xreader fic 💖💖💖
Can i also request ot8xreader, you suddenly disappeared and they thought you ran away (with their money and jewelries) and betrayef them but in reality one of their female employees leads you to nowhere and tried to kill you (because she is jealous and wants the boys for herself) she make it looks like you ran away to make the boys mad at you but you are laying in hospital bed comatose for months. one of boys/or member of the mafia saw you in hospital when they tried to smuggle medical equipments and report it to ateez.
I hope it make sense 😅 Thank you
You are our Home
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Pairing: Mafia! Ateez x f!reader
Genre: Angst, Mafia, Fluff
W.C: 8.2k
Warnings: arguments, regret, trust issues, cheating(?), hints of torture, mention of cuts and wounds(just the pain not detailed), mention of hospital and mafia business and deals, traumas and betrayals, comatose, stroke, nausea, scared, crying, lies. A lot shit is going on in the fic.
Networks: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity
Note: Thanks for reading and reblogging. I appreciate all of your reviews and feel free to text me if you want. Spread love to others, not hate. I don’t know what’s up to with the requests coz all are Angst at this point. But I have included fluff here. Clap your hands👏.
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“Are you sure she is not home?”
“Seonghwa, I have gone there myself to check the whole place. Even few of her things are missing. Something is not setting right here.” Hongjoong’s impatient voice echoed through the speaker in the room. The members round the table were all attentive to the conversation between the two older ones. “Yeosang is tracking her id but he couldn’t find anything important. And what about San? Did he come back?”
Hearing the question, Seonghwa looked towards Wooyoung who shook his head and the older one sighed before delivering the message to their leader on call. Before hanging up the call, he informed the three members to come back to their office for further discussion about you. They last heard your voice yesterday evening when you were asking them if they would return yesterday or the next day. They didn’t know that the next day, instead of finding you waiting for them at the parking lot, they will be greeted to an empty cabin.
Usually, whenever they go to overseas missions, you pass on it because you intend to maintain all the procedures in the office and home. They respect your thoughts and opinions a lot so they never said anything on those way of thinking. Just like other trips, they bid goodbye to you and they went off to the designated country. When they reached there, you had a video call with them and they assured you that they would return soon—one month would pass in a blink. But maybe something went wrong. With the passing of days, you became distant with them, not picking up their calls or maybe just leaving a short text message ‘I’m busy’ and your close employee friend, Amy supported your side, telling them that the company had some issues ongoing with money and she also sent them all the details where it was always your duty to do it. Generally, they didn’t mind but they were worried for you overworking yourself so they told Amy to look after you. She assured them that she would be always by your side and would manage to do the most of the works.
Today, it was their day of return and last evening hearing your voice over the call made them impatient to come back home soon. They wanted to talk to you a lot but somehow you were not in a mood to hold a long conversation with them and so they didn’t ask you anything much. It was okay because they knew very next moment you will be in their arms and then they will keep you away from workloads for a while. But who knew, you won’t be anywhere in their surroundings.
San slammed the door open and glared at the ones present inside the room. The one who was sitting near the door rolled his eyes, knowing his over-dramatic acts like usual but when he caught his gaze, he could see the fire in his eyes.
Seonghwa raised his brow from the end of the table, “What happened, San?” Wooyoung and Mingi close to him were also watching San shuffling his hairs in anger and threw the glass from the table beside Jongho, who was already annoyed with him from earlier.
“Where is Hongjoong?”
Wooyoung was quick to reply, “He was on a call with us almost an hour back. They went to our home and then they will stop by the store to pick up some packages. They will be back soon.” Mingi nodded and went back to check some important news, displaying on his phone screen.
“Who else has the access to the shared account?”
“What do you mean by that, San? You know we don’t use that account and it’s only get handled by y/n. after she returns, you can ask her about it if it has any problem.” Seonghwa said it calmly but he could see the impatient and a flick of rage in the man’s eyes. San again picked up a glass but got stopped by Jongho, “don’t throw it again.”
They glared at each other before gulping down the water and he turned towards the oldest one.
“did she tell anything about transacting large amount of money? You know the account is empty as well as the spare account doesn’t have any money. The locker with the expensive jewels in her cabin is also empty. Why does she need so much of money all of a sudden?”
Everyone was shocked on hearing him. You needed money and for what? Nobody had any sort of hint that maybe you were going through some rough days, they would have consulted things with you. They would have tried to make you relax but no—you kept everything to yourself and didn’t tell anything to them. You were in some trouble and the thought itching their mind to ask you about it.
“her phone is still switched off.” Jongho sighed and sat on the couch beside Mingi who glanced at the clock.
San sat beside Wooyoung, “What’s even going on? There is no news of her whereabouts. She is not picking up her calls and now all these moneys and jewelleries are missing. I want her to explain me everything right now.”
“San, calm down. I am sure she has her own reasons for this.”
“And when do you think will she return, Mingi? Are you sure we are just going to sit and wait for her?”
Before the other could say anything, the door slammed open and Hongjoong entered furiously with Yeosang and Yunho trailing behind him. Neither of them appeared any less frustrated than the leader. Wooyoung was still staring at the door until it got closed by Yunho. He sighed and looked away—he thought you might enter the room with them and then would surprise them with a silly joke and the rest of the day will end up with you getting scolded but in the end you knew it was because they care for you.
Where are you?
“What’s the news, Yeosang?”
Hongjoong sat on his chair and ruffled his hairs, Seonghwa patted his back and looked towards the hacker who was being asked a question by the youngest.
“Nothing Jongho. We can’t find her anywhere. It’s still showing her last location was at the A.T.M and we checked the C.C.T.V but she was pretty normal when entering it and exiting the stall. I don’t why was she there-“
“to withdraw all the moneys from her shared account and the private one.”
Hongjoong raised his brows at San, “why do you think so?”
“Amy showed me all the past transactions from her side. She might not have withdraw all the money in person but has transferred to some other accounts.” He signalled Yeosang to open his laptop and the one was quick in action, “Can you search the accounts that are connected with hers where the money got transferred?”
Yunho scanned the room, “but why did she need such large amount of money? I am pretty sure she would have told one of us if she was in trouble.”
Seonghwa nodded and walked towards the wide large glass window and stared at the city. He was trying to find your location in the chaos of the city, his eyes were roaming everywhere as if he could get a glimpse of you. He was behaving like a lost boy desperate for you to hug him. Maybe he was a the second in command after the most feared mafia leader, Hongjooong--- in the end it’s you with whom they are the real persons, they can be themselves. Tears flowed down his eyes and he didn’t notice that Wooyoung was standing behind him and suddenly patted his back. He himself was fighting the urge not to break down.
Hongjoong glanced at them across the room and sighed.
Mingi put down his phone and the typing of the keyboard was heard along with some frustrated groans. Jongho spoke up, “San told us that the jewelleries are also missing from her lockers.”
“What? Even her expensive items from her room were also missing.” Hongjoong was surprised that you were missing for so many hours and then all those money and other expensive items were missing too.
Yeosang shut his laptop with a groan and glared at the device. San beside him asked what happened but the news they got was not what they were expecting.
“She has been transferring money for last 6 months and for the last one month, she has spent money on some expensive trips and buying properties. The two accounts where the moneys are being transferred are highly protected with firewalls. I can’t access to it. It only seems like it’s been handled and protected by hackers from other mafia groups.”
Mingi furrowed his brows, “mafia groups? Why will she be transferring money to other mafias?”
Hongjoong pocked his cheek with the tongue, “she doesn’t usually spend such amount of money at once. And according to her schedule, she was pretty much busy with her work-loads.”
“yeah, Amy was always the one asking us if we needed any kind of help and giving us updates on her because she was busy with some events outdoor. Can you give me her schedule for once?”
Yeosang nodded and searched for the schedules Amy sent him and delivered it to Yunho who was quick to open it and read the routines. His creased eyebrows got noticed by Hongjoong, “what happened, Yunho?”
The man shook his head before turning the laptop from Yeosang towards him from across the table and quickly typed something. Everyone was watching his actions and Jongho was peeking at the screen from beside him, “why are you searching these companies?”
Hongjoong raised his hand to let him do his work. After a couple of minutes, Yunho clenched his jaw and shut the screen before turning towards the leader, “I was right.”
“what?”
“these companies: first FACT CHECK enterprise didn’t have any events because they were overseas with us, next ORANGE FATE didn’t held any events for last few weeks and SEVENTEEN has no updates. This only means she didn’t have anything according to her schedules and some same schedules are repeated again and again. Without getting anything solved, everything is appearing to be more puzzled.”
Jongho patted Yunho’s back and turned towards the leader, “we should call Amy and ask her.” The leader nodded and Mingi quickly dialled her number to ask her come to their room. Seonghwa and Wooyoung also returned to their places and waited for her.
As soon as Amy got the call, she skipped towards the room and entered the door with a worried expression. The boys looked at her and noticed her worriedness but Hongjoong asked her not to panic and let her sit on the chair beside Yeosang where you were supposed to sit in other times.
She sat on your chair.
She smirked to herself. Second step achieved, including her in the meetings. First step was already going pretty well when they were calling from overseas to know the daily updates of their place from her---apparently you were busy.
Sitting down slowly, she clasped her hands and Yunho noticed her heavy breaths. They all turned towards the leader when he spoke up, “where were you all these days?”
She bit her lips and tugged her hair behind her ear. She nervously glanced at everyone when Jongho offered her a glass of water. She thanked him and quickly gulped it down, taking few breaths she proceeded, “I-I was working here in the office and then keeping you all updated.”
“where was she? You were not with her?”
“y-yeah I was with her but only when she was inside the building. She was always busy outside.”
“where did she go?”
“the events. I don’t know anything in details because everyday she was late to office, complaining that how tired she is and then going out frustrated. Trust me, I thought you all should know about it because why she will tell me anything.”
“do you know why she needed money? Was she in trouble?”
She paused before glancing at them and then looked down, “n-no. I don’t know. If this was known by me. I would have told you all about it.” She started sobbing and looked up, “I am worried for her. I hope you all find her soon and I will get my friend back.”
Yeosang patted her back and everyone felt bad seeing her cry because she was really close with you and you enjoyed her company so much that they could feel her loneliness and concern when you were missing. She excused herself and Jongho went with her because they didn’t want others to know about the situation yet and she needed someone by her side because of her being oversensitive.
.
.
.
The next two weeks they had done everything possible to reach your location but you were nowhere as if your presence was vanished from the universe. There were no sign of kidnapping because there was no call from any mafia groups, no threats from any rivals and everything was normal and in place without you. It seemed like you never existed but yeah, the employees started asking about your absence and that led to them getting hold of the reality. The news was quick to spread everywhere, to every corner of the city.
Amy became closer to them and she was handling all your works. Them consulting few things with her, of course it was a great achievement for her. At some point, some members were losing hope to find you and becoming reckless. The leader was having a hard time in controlling them but he knew the emotions and conditions of his family because he was on the same boat.
With the passing of days, the chances of getting you back was disappearing and one more thing they were noticing, the strange behaviour of Amy. She was often seen zoning out and flinching to sudden people. They realised she was very traumatized with your disappearance. But a sudden parcel flipped everything upside-down.
Amy was sitting down with the parcel in front of her on the table and them scattered all around the room. Some were in disbelief and some were furious. She was crying and with shaky hands holding and looking at the things which they found out from the parcel.
The leader was hovering on her from the side and glaring, “Amy, What are you hiding from us? Tell me now before I lose my patience.”
She kept quiet and staring at the pictures. You were laughing with a boy, receiving gifts from him, partying at a club with him and kissing and also, you were on a trip for a week with him. It was definitely you, there was no editing and the details were pointing out that you were really not present at home or at office on those days and it only made it clear that there was lot going on behind their back.
“Amy! Speak up!”
She flinched and wiped the tears.
“she was meeting this boy everyday.”
The boy was familiar to them, Lee Heesung from Orange Fate Limited. They often had meetings and events with them. They were not on a term of rivals but were on an agreement of allies because of their head departments.
Seonghwa said darkly, “Continue.” San clenched his fist with every words coming from her mouth.
“she told me not to say you all anything that she was……she was cheating behind you all. She was with you because you all are too naïve that you trust her so much. She threatened me that she would kill me if I go against her. I couldn’t do anything because you all would have never trusted me but I tried to tell you so many times. I am only explaining everything today because its been a month that she has gone missing. But actually, she was planning to run away for a while.” She started weeping and Mingi comforted her. He was hesitant to be so close to her but why he should feel guilty when you didn’t think twice before doing such a thing to them.
They were sick worried for you only to get a parcel, maybe from their ally base that you were with their leader all these times. Yunho scoffed hearing the explanation and Jongho glanced at him before sighing and switched on his lock screen where he was hugging you from behind and both smiling at Yeosang who was behind the camera clicking the picture. A tear drop fell on the screen, just above your face.
He hated himself for missing you.
Mingi took her outside because she was scared and blabbering nonsense and was convincing them that she would bring you back and make you apologize. She explained everything how you were not busy due to workload but because you were going out with your boyfriend. The rage was building inside them with the thought that what more you had done with him other than kissing behind their back. All these past months when you were intimated with them, actually you were just using them as a stress reliever and maybe you were complaining about them to Heesung when you were making love with him.
Yeosang curled his fingers, nails scratching the leather of the chair’s armrest.
Woooyung asked his leader, “Are we going to bring her back? We going to-“
“We are going nowhere. She is not our concern anymore. If she chose to go away, to find love in someone else then let it be.” San growled.
Wooyoung shook his head and with pleading eyes he stared at the leader. He wanted to hear his thoughts and he was sure he won’t agree with San but he was wrong.
“No more discussion on y/n. she was not missing but enjoying her life.” He scoffed, “I wanted to believe that these all are wrong but no. it had to be true. Why had it to be true? She betrayed us. She played with out trust. There is nothing to keep up with this conversation.”
He leaned back into his chair and ordered everyone to leave. They were hesitant to leave because each one of them were sure that if they went off to their individual ways, they would end up doing something worse. But why should they harm themselves? It was you who betrayed them and then ended up breaking their hearts.
If someone had to regret, IT’s You.
Seonghwa halted at the door and looked back towards the leader who was glaring at your picture on the wall, “are you sure we are not going to get her?”
“Never. We are not going to trust her again. Let’s pretend we never met her. And Leave.”
.
.
.
Days went on and turned into months and they all were emotionless as if they only knew their missions and going back home, commanding others and then going back to their own life. No extra conversation with anyone. They even became distant among themselves and Amy was enjoying this a lot because afterall she was the who was spending most of the times with them, delivering the messages and information to them and their individual opinions to each other via her.
Jongho knocked at the leader’s bedroom door. It was noon and none of them went to office building, only Seonghwa went for an hour to check the updates and returned early. Everybody was at home but in their individual room, Jongho glanced at the door between Yunho and Wooyoung’s room. It was locked. In other times, he would often find music blasting from your room and then finding you dancing like a maniac.
“what do you need?”
“the medical kit is empty and I need to treat Yeosang’s wound from yesterday.”
“the ones in the cabinets in the upper rack?”
“nothing.”
Hongjoong sighed and pull off a jacket before exiting his room and signalled him to follow.
“where are we going?”
He stopped and glared, “of course to the base hospital. I definitely know other hospitals will freak out seeing us.” Jongho nodded to his statement and followed him.
Arriving to the hospital, they straight way went to the cabin where its pretty usual for them to appear often.
"Hongjoong?" The said man stopped in his track on hearing someone called him.
It was their rival gang NCT’s member standing in front of him. They never had anything against each other but they were allies with someone who was apparently their enemy.
"Mark. What are you doing here?" Jongho asked in a monotone voice to which the boy before him licked his lips.
"Dude don't think I'm here for any sort of mission. I work here as a part time worker like my leader forced us to keep a normal citizen profile as well, might help us in some ways."
"Why are you saying all these to us? I'm sure your leader won't be happy to see you being friendly with us." Hongjoong smirked.
Mark nodded and glanced at his surroundings expression turning towards them, "I didn't know y/n was in relationship with you all."
"What are you trying to say?"Jongho inquired him and he sighed.
"Hongjoong I heard that you guys were searching y/n but I didn't know how to reach to you guys because my leader strictly told me not to contact any one of you."
"What are you upto?"
"Do you know what happened to her?"
Hongjoong scoffed and glared at him, "don't interfere in our matters. It's all over between us and her so I would like you to get the fuck out of my way."
"So you trusted some bitch?" now it's Mark who was glaring.
"What do you mean?"
Mark held his wrist and dragged him towards a room. "what are you doing?"
"Please come with me. It's for your own sake."
Both of them hesitantly followed him and when he opened the door, they were greeted by the worst view. Their breathing stopped for a moment, they froze with the time. It felt like they were dreaming and oblivious to himself, Jongho stepped forward towards the bed.
IT’s You.
You were sleeping peacefully on the bed.
"What happened to her?" Hongjoong was holding back his tears and clenched his fist. Tears welped in his eyes. He was shocked to see you lying in front of him on a hospital bed with a white sheet covering your body and you were connected to the machines beside you. His eyes followed the bandages wrapped in different places which were visible to his eyes. He didn’t want to think anymore about it. He was clenching his fist that all these months he blamed you and thought that you betrayed them was just to find you in the hospital.
Did Heesung hurt you?
“She is comatose for last few months.” Mark stated, eyes fixed on you.
Hongjoong was glaring at you. Atleast at this moment he thought had it better if you were somewhere enjoying your life rather than being in coma.
Jongho who was kneeling beside your bed caressed your hand, “Why? Why is she in this condition?”
“That day when I was returning from the mission, she stumbled in front of my car. Dude she is not here because of that, I was not driving. Me and my friend were just chatting by the side of the road when she came to us running frantically. She was so scared and covered in blood.” Mark licked his lips and shook his head when he remembered the day.
“who are you? Why did you help her?” the leader asked the question but didn’t glance to his direction.
“I know it’s weird but we are childhood friends. After I joined the mafia gang and for the sake of my leader, I had to keep distance with her so that she might not get in trouble with this dark life but somehow she ended up with you all.” He sadly chuckled.
He continued, “I searched about her when I brought her to the hospital. I found out that she was related to you all and the first thought that came to my mind was that you did this to her. But then when I found that you all are searching for her, I was confused for a while but then gradually came to know the truth. Somebody has tortured her and her body was lacking nutrients and due to the deficiency of iron, she got a stroke.”
“torture? Who did this?” the leader was losing his patient with each word coming out his mouth.
“when I brought her here, she was conscious for few days. Yeah, I strictly told others that they should not let anyone to know about her and Taeil is her doctor. She was repeating some things like ‘Amy please don’t do this’  ‘I want to go home’  ‘help me’  ‘I will go away but please don’t hurt me’. according to the reports she is in vegetative state right now, she got a stroke when one day she was thrashing around things.”
A ring interrupted their conversation. Hongjoong was lost with your view and the words from Mark were sinking inside him. He was still processing that you were in front of him and on top of that, you were in a miserable state.
Somebody tortured you? Amy?
Mark broke his trance and urged him to pick up the call.
“where are you? We need to treat the wound and there is nothing in here.”
“Seonghwa, come to the base hospital and bring others too.”
“What’s going on?”
“Just do what I said. You will know when you reach here.”
“I think hearing some familiar voices or maybe something that can trigger the stimuli can bring her back to senses so I hope for the best. She is attentive to some responses and you all are my last hope.”
Mark patted his back and excused himself. He ordered some guards outside the door not to allow anyone inside the room except few members whom he will be sending soon.
Hongjoong stepped forward and with slow steps, he sat beside your bed. His shaky hands caressed your head, tears fell on you when he planted a kiss on your forehead. Jongho was still holding your hand on the other side and was watching your slow breathings.
“y/n……please wake up.” Hongjoong’s voice cracked and he didn’t know what to say anymore. He was angry, upset, hurt and moreover, he was dying inside. He couldn’t afford to see you in that condition.
They waited for a while. They were whispering so many things and tears flowing down their eyes continuously. They were lost after seeing your condition. The leader was confused that why someone had to treat you in this way when you did nothing in the first place. He was feeling to rip off the machines from you so that he could hug you and shield you from all the negativities that might be lingering around you.
The door slammed open and several footsteps could be heard entering the room when suddenly all the sounds paused.
“y/n?” Wooyoung was quick to run towards your sleeping figure, he pushed aside his leader and hugged your body, resting himself on top of you. He was excited but also confused after seeing you in that condition.
 You were laying pale and fragile upon a sterile hospital bed. Concern etched deep lines of worry upon their faces as they gathered around you, their hearts heavy with fear and uncertainty.
Seonghwa glanced at you and then towards Hongjoong who was not even taking off his eyes from you. “what is this Hongjoong? Why is she here?”
He didn’t reply and when he turned towards Jongho, he stood up to give space to Mingi so that he could stand beside your bed. The youngest was not willing to leave your hand but still others needed to see you as well so he stepped towards Seonghwa, “she is in coma for last few months. Somebody had kept her locked up and tortured her.”
“what?” San glared at him. “what are you saying, Jongho? Who?”
“I don’t know-“
“Amy.” Hongjoong stated the name blankly and stared at Seonghwa. “Are you sure?”
“she was scared of her before she went into coma so that only proves she has something to do with her.”
Wooyoung’s grip tightened around you. Yeosang was beside him who was trying to comfort him but also wishing for you to wake up. He couldn’t believe his eyes that you were in front of him. He could feel your skin against his fingertips. Your faint breathing could be heard and it was the only hope, the only belief that you were with him, with them.
Yeosang caressed your hand and pressed a soft kiss, “y/n, look we are here. Wake up. We all are here to protect you. No one can hurt you. Please look at me, y/n .” he started sobbing and buried his face into the hold where your fingers were getting wet with his tears.
Mingi caressed your head, “y/n… we are here to take you home, doll. Please open your eyes. Try to hear my voice I am here.”
Wooyoung traced his fingers over the bandages and the healing cuts on your face. The beautiful face, the soft skin which always felt amazing against his and he never missed a place to kiss every inch of it. Now its all covered with cuts and bandages. “baby please wake up. Please look at me, talk to me.”
Three of them were crying surrounding you and the rest of them closely behind them were hoping to see your eyes fluttering open and to tell them what you went through. They were cursing themselves for once believing that you left and betrayed them.
They were hating themselves for believing that.
Yeosang pulled back Wooyoung and both of them sat on the couch to the side, the younger one was sobbing in his hold. Hongjoong nodded towards Seonghwa and the older one sat on the stool beside your head and held your hand, the leader stood behind him.
“y/n…can you hear me? Love we are all here for you. Look we found you.” Seonghwa gulped the lump, smiled sadly and continued, “We will get through this together. You need to wake up for me.” Hongjoong placed a hand on his shoulder to encourage him to keep going.
San moved forward, he was observing things from a distance and was silently praying all the Almighty to wake you up, to do a miracle so that he could see your eyes and smile again. Mingi stepped back to give him space and he kneeled beside you and took your hand in his trembling ones, the needles from the iv-drip and other machines piercing your skin and he was holding back the urge to rip that off because it might be hurting you. “Y/n……”
“I can't bear to see you like this. Please, wake up...please…I love you so much" he mumbled and planted a kiss on the knuckles.
“you need to see yourself. You are strong enough to come all these ways alone. You can fight more. You are no more alone, we are here for you.” Seonghwa pronounced every word distinctly so that you could hear them, understand him and atleast process slowly that you were not alone but surrounded by your loved ones. Your family.
Jongho slowly said to them, “Mark told us if we trigger a memory then she might wake up. She is responsive to some stimuli earlier. I don’t know what to do but please do something and wake her up. If not then she will be under more risk.”
“No! she won’t.” Wooyoung shouted and again stood beside you, “y/n, don’t give up on us like this. You cant leave us. I wont be able to live if I lose you. Wake up please.”
Yeosang stood beside him, voice cracking “ you are our heart y/n. just tell me what you need, I will do anything for you but don’t leave me please.”
Hongjoong gulped, “Y/n…remember the day we met, those happy moments which we cherish. I still think about them everyday even after the day you were missing. Please we have so much to do in our life. We love you.”
Mingi’s voice wavered, “We'll be here for you every step of the way, I'll fight this battle with you, y/n. Together, as one...nine makes one family.”
Your index finger moved a little in San’s hold. He was surprised, his breath hitched. He looked towards everyone but others gave him a confused look. he was smiling and holding your hand tightly and glancing between you and them.
“guys she can hear us. Her finger is moving.” His gaze landed on the last one who haven’t said anything after they had arrived. He was fuming but crying and San knew that he could do anything if he was quiet. “Yunho…”
The sterile white walls of the hospital room surrounded him, the heavy air which he breathing was filled with different emotions. But the only emotion that was tugging in every corner was the faint ray of hope.
Hope for you to wake up.
Hearing his name, slow and heavy steps took him to your side. Seonghwa who was still whispering some old happy memories paused and moved back a bit. Yunho stared at your face. The memory of you smiling at him and laughing at his jokes. You acting like a baby and always promising that he would protect you like your big saviour. But he didn’t. he broke his promise. He left you alone to fight and then you were fighting with your death.
He will kill every person who did this with you.
“Y/n, You're my reason to keep going. I…we won't let you go. Stay with me. I love you, Pearl.”
The familiar voices echoing inside your head.
Their voices.
Your family.
Nine makes one family.
You clutched San’s hand but quickly loosened the grip. You repeated the action. Their eyes not leaving a second of your form. Your dry lips parted slightly to seep through some air. The oxygen mask felt like suffocating the air.
Slowly, like tendrils of fog dissipating under the morning sun, consciousness began to seep back into your mind.
Your eyelids fluttered, heavy with the weight of slumber, as you struggled to orient yourself to the surroundings. The rhythmic beeping of the heart monitor echoed in their ears, a steady cadence that anchored all to the present moment.
With a groan, you attempted to shift your body, the sensation of stiffness and lethargy weighing you down like an anchor. Your limbs felt foreign, disconnected from the mind, as if you were a marionette being manipulated by invisible strings. Few deep cuts and wounds stinged, you whimpered at the pain.
As your vision cleared, you became aware of the figures standing by your bedside, silhouettes bathed in the soft glow of the overhead lights. their faces had masks of concern as they observed your awakening. You couldn’t place the names with the faces.
Who are they? Do you know them? Why are you here? Wait…where are you?
You twisted your neck to every direction, an air of suffocation engulfing you and the memory of being locked up, bloods, wounds, cut and crying flashed in front of your eyes.
“baby…” Seonghwa’s voice made you look at him. Your eyes were filled with horror. They will hurt you again. An adrenaline hit you which made you feel to run away and save yourself. You were trapped and you needed to get out. You got rid of the oxygen mask.
“no…no…please don’t kill me…I..” you pushed yourself up, groaning because you felt your lethargic body was heavy with tons of weight, you wanted to move but still couldn’t. you started crying and retreated your hand back when you felt someone was holding it. San left your hand when he saw fear in your eyes. You were confused, scared and tired but still attempted to make a run.
Wooyoung’s voice choked with emotion, “baby you are awake…”  you shook your head and  twisted your body but Yunho was quick to make you still and you groaned when the wound in your waist sent a wave of pain throughout your body.
“please…leave me…I want to go home please…” you were crying and wiggling weakly under his hold.
Yunho was standind straight and engulfing your upper body tightly in his hold to let you cry and shout but he couldn’t let you go away when surprisingly he got you back from the edge of death, “shh shhh…Y/n, don’t cry please. I am here. No one is going to hurt you.”
Seonghwa patted your head, “we are going to take you home.”
“no…no…they  they are waiting for me. Joong…I want to go to him…Hwa…Woo…please please.”
“baby, I am Woo. I’m right here.” You glanced at him. a memory of you fooling around and laughing with him flashed in front of him.
You shook your head and Yunho pushed your head against his chest and placed a kiss on top, “it’s me, Yunho. Love calm down.”
When you didn’t stop shaking, he held your face and made you look into his eyes, he was holding back his tears and still smiled at you, “I am here. Right in front of you. You are safe with me. Your Yuyu is with you.”
You stared at him and your actions slowed down. He shifted and sat on the edge and pulled you closer. “Yunho…” hearing his name from your mouth, he pulled you closer and caressed your sides, lulling you to calm down.
“yes, it’s me. we all are here.”
San placed himself on the other side edge of the bed to caress your back. Even though, they were sad seeing you vulnerable but somehow a relief settled inside them that you were awake. You were with them.
“Calm down for me. will you?”
Hearing his soothing voice, you clutched his shirt. Your tears were soaking it but he didn’t care about that, he just wanted you to not feel scared of them.
They knew it was a burden for you to take in your surrounding after waking up from coma after months. You took deep breaths and he could feel your trembling body calming down.
“Y/n. How are you feeling?” Hongjoong’s concerned voice echoed in the air, reaching your ears. Several nights you spent calling out his name, hoping for him to save you but you were alone. Your mind slowly and slowly settling down and you got a grip of your current situation.
You looked down to see yourself wrapped in a hospital gown.
You were in hospital.
“paining. It’s paining everywhere.” You mumbled and stared at Hongjoong. He stepped forward and softly cupped your face, giving you a warm smile.
“it will go away. You will be fine soon.” He kissed your forehead. Seonghwa stood beside him with a bright smile, his presence itself was giving you a blanket of comfort adding to the warmth from Yunho was hugging you.
Hwa nodded and removed the strand of hairs from your face and tugged them neatly behind your ears, “my pretty baby. Do you need something?”
You moved your head up and down slowly, he urged you to speak, “I..I want water.” He didn’t waste a second, quickly turning on his heel, walked towards the table to get a glass of water. You felt your throat was burning dry and you coughed.
San patted your back, “its okay. Take it slow. You are fine.”
Hongjoong wiped your eyes, “don’t cry, baby. We are here for you. Always.”
Wooyoung sat beside your legs and ran his hands up and down above the blanket. Even though he couldn’t feel your skin against his but he knew you were fine and with him.
You stared at him when Seonghwa gave you the glass, you gulped the water hastily. You coughed when you choked. Yunho and Seonghwa softly scolded you not to rush. Your gaze returned towards Wooyoung, you extended your hand and he intertwined his fingers with yours. Tears fell from your eyes. “you are really here...”
“Yes I am. For you.”
Seonghwa and Hongjoong moved aside to let Mingi and Yeosang in front of your view. They were trying their best to appear happy but they knew with just a blink, you would see them all breaking down. Mingi kissed your nose and gave you a tight hug, “do you want to eat?”
“I don’t know. I want to…go home.” You turned towards Yunho, “please take me home. I don’t want to stay here.” He nodded and wiped your eyes, “shh…we will go okay. We are waiting for the doctor to allow the discharge for you.”
Yeosang cupped your face to bring your attention on him, “we are going to watch movies and we will play tag game. How about that?”
You smiled and their heart melted seeing the small curled up lips, “yes. I would love that but I’m feeling so weak.”
Wooyoung chimed in, “You have to eat a lot to become strong and then we will watch movies and discuss your favorite things. You have to show us your favorite stories.”
Hongjoong chuckled, “You cant make her do that even now. She will still run after you because she always do her best to hide the things she read. But I’m curious too.”
Mingi raised his brows and nodded, “those are in English so even if I get a hold of it. I don’t know how to read them.”
Jongho laughed lightly, “deliver them to me. I will let you know about it.”
Seonghwa shook his head and laughed. The atmosphere was becoming lighter than before and they were glad that you were smiling with them. Jongho kissed your nose, “you need to walk more or you will feel more weak. But you should rest until the wounds are getting better.”
You nodded.
You were always an independent and hardworking woman and that’s how they got attracted to you. Every on the point decisions and single handedly and actively managing lots of works was never a small deal for anyone but they saw you doing it and they were impressed. When you got the offer to join the company, you didn’t know it belonged to a mafia base but what to do, when they told you about it, you were already in love with them. They were always honest with you and respected and even treated you like a queen. Their queen.
 But today, seeing you so weak and vulnerable like a baby was breaking their heart into million pieces. You were hurt, you were scared and traumatized.
A groan escaped your lips when you shifted in your place and Yeosang made you still and Yunho helping you to sit properly, leaning your back to his chest. You turned towards San who was quite all these moments. He was still sitting on the bed close to you and rubbing his hands up and down your body. He wanted to feel you, to make himself belief that he was not dreaming but it’s the reality.
Yeosang with concerned eyes looked towards you and asked, “Are you okay? Where is it hurting?”
San urged you to speak, “tell us baby. Where does it hurt?”
“Everywhere.”
Yeosang, the medic of the group knew he had to take care of you more after returning back home. Yunho massaged your side and it did wonder to relieve some tensions.
Your gaze fell on San’s hand, it was bandaged. Your eyes went wide and you looked towards others to scan them. Why are they hurt? You couldn’t find anything visible on Wooyoung, not even on Jongho but when you watched Yeosang fishing his hand inside the jacket’s pocket. You quickly grabbed it and caressed the bandaged palm. You didn’t notice it earlier.
“Why are you hurt? What happened?”
He shook his head, “nothing major.”
Your other hand grabbed San’s wounded one, “does it hurt?”
“no baby. Calm down. Getting hurt during missions is pretty normal.”
“don’t normalize these things. I don’t want you all to get hurt.” San hugged your side. “I’m sorry…”
“why?” his whisper fanned your ears, tickling you lightly.
Hongjoong frowned, “why are you sorry? You did nothing wrong, y/n.”
“but I am here…”
Wooyoung placed a finger on your lips, “don’t speak. That’s not your fault. You are safe and talking with us. That’s what we want right now.”
Seonghwa patted your head before announcing, “I am going to talk with her doctor…what was the name again?”
Jongho stated, “Taeil.”
“ah yes him. so Mingi and Jongho come along with me, we need to take some medical equipment as well.”
The two nodded and followed behind him before them sending smiles towards you. Your eyes followed them until they closed the door behind them.
“San…”
“hmm… tell me.”
“I don’t want to go to that office building. And you did got some pictures, right?”
Before he could reply Hongjoong interrupted, “no we are not going there anytime soon.” You nodded.
San furrowed his brows, “what pictures?”
“me and Heesung…”
Yunho pulled you closer if its even possible, “why? Why are you asking?”
“do you all trust that? I mean the pictures are real but…”
“but?” Hongjoong just needed some truth and the plannings he already made inside his head would be in action. “tell me y/n.”
“I was drugged and didn’t know what he did. Amy…she used me to get to get you all. She forced me to transfer money, to meet him, and so on. But trust me I didn’t want to do anything. I wanted you all. I wanted to go home. I still want to go far away with you all.”
“calm down, Y/n. we are not speaking about those things right now.” Yeosang shushed you and  Hongjoong clenched his jaw.
He is going to kill her. He is going to torture her till the day she dies of blood loss. He wants to rip her heart out. Does she even have one? He mentally scoffed. He caught Yunho and San staring at him. they both smirked when they saw the leader was fuming.
The leader showed his dirty smirk towards them. They knew the hell was going to break loose for someone.
Seonghwa called Yeosang and asked him to tell others to take you to the car because they got the permission to take you home as Yeosang could manage the rest. He removed the needles and you winced but he was quick to tape the wounds. Wooyoung held your side when you tried to stand up. You felt your head spinning and nauseous hit you. Hongjoong quickly brought a mug in front of your face to let you vomit and Yunho held your hairs in a ponytail and patting your back, encouraging you to take it easy and you will be okay. Yeosang wiped your mouth with wet tissues and San swept you off the ground.
“you are not walking anymore. You need to rest and your limbs are still too weak to make you stand strong even for a second.”
You didn’t argue because you yourself were aware of your condition. As soon as you all left the room, people moved aside seeing the mafia group carrying a girl in their arms. Some had sympathetic look and some with curiosity whispering to each other. You felt awkward under the gazes and you buried your face in his chest. His laugh vibrated in your face and you could hear others chuckled.
Wooyoung ruffled your hairs, “silly.”
Reaching the parking lot, the others were already there. The fresh air hit your face, feeling lively and Seonghwa came in front, “are you okay?”
“I want to stay outside. Please.” You were whining like a baby in san’s arms.
One by one they all entered the car and you were laying with your head resting on Seonghwa’s lap and legs placed over San’s thigh. You pout when they didn’t acknowledge your request. Jongho stared at you, “what happened?”
“I said I wanted to stay outside.”
“didn’t you want to go home?”
You sighed and closed your eyes. Yes, you wanted to return home.
Hongjoong laughed from the passenger seat and Yunho spoke up, “we are going to the beach in front of our house. We will have our lunch there and spend the evening there as well.”
Your eyes fluttered open, “really?”
“yes.” Mingi assured you and joked to make you laugh.
San stroked your legs, “you are our home, y/n. I love you.”
Even if you wanted to go to the house, your home.  It’s fine. Wherever they are, its your home.
They are your home.
“you guys are my home too. My world.”
[thanks for loving the ot8 fics anon <3. I hope you liked this one.]
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Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @hwanring @sanwifesstuff @kiwiisnthereoops @kiwiraccoon @hyuukah @kazscara @aceofspadesbiofalltrades @nvdhrzn [open!]
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miuszn · 11 months
Note
i’m actually so obsessed with your bouncer!ellie.. we need a fic immediately 🤭 -🪐
taste of lust
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SETTING : modern au
WC : 5011
WARNINGS : sexual harassment ( nothing graphic ) ( but reader is sort of implied to have trauma related to it , nothing stated explicitly tho ) , bouncer!ellie x bottlegirl!reader , idk shit about clubs so like some stuff might be insanely inaccurate but i did my best to research ( sorry in advance ) , dash of dealer!ellie bc who doesn’t love her , dom!ellie , sub!reader , teasing , overstimulation if u squint , ellie calls u pretty girl & princess , readers first time with a strap , ellie refers to her strap as her cock , i’m not fluent in english yet so there might be mistakes , not beta read
A / N : hello everyoneeee !!! i know this took FOREVER to finish and i’m so sorry about that .. i’ve been super super busy and this fic was so long omg T_T there was a point i started over completely bc i didn’t like the direction it was heading to .. this fanfic shit gets serious truly . in case u missed the warning there is sexual harassment in this fic and reader is implied to have trauma related to it . putting this here again to make sure u guys see it . anyway , i took so long to post this and so much stuff happened !! but alas , it is here , the bottlegirl!reader and bouncer!ellie fic !! this is my fav fic of mine so far so i hope u guys enjoy reading this as much as i liked writing it <3 ( and yes there will be a part two !! )
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
being a bottle girl wasn’t exactly the job of your dreams. having to deal with creepy rich men every friday and saturday night was definitely not something you enjoyed doing, but that was what paid the bills and allowed you to live a rather comfy lifestyle for a college student. the bad part no one tells you about going to a top college on a full-ride scholarship is that a lot of the students are rich kids who most definitely cheated their way through high school, who live in nice apartments paid for by their mommy and daddy, who use birkins and other designer brand bags as their school bags, who would never be caught dead eating at the cafeteria. of course, you felt out of place. you weren’t exactly poor, but your family definitely could never afford that kind of lifestyle.
you’re pretty. extremely pretty. and you knew you could use that to your advantage. so when you saw a new club in the city that was looking for bottle girls you immediately knew you had to apply. sure, you had to deal with a couple creepy customers every night and sometimes even had to remind them they’re not allowed to touch you, which was annoying. you also hated being seen as an object, and you knew that’s exactly how these men saw you, and what was even worse was those very unsettling “you remind me of my daughter” comments from older men since you were so young. but the money was the main thing you needed, and you were able to put up with all this because of the pay. although the salary itself is just enough to survive, most of your earnings were in tips, and you made good tips. with a little bit of flirting and pretending you were really into customers, you scored lots of tips in the hundreds and sometimes even thousands. that wasn’t really enough for you to be able to afford luxury items whenever you wanted, but you were able to treat yourself every once in a while and that was enough for you.
you and your coworker ellie are the only college students that worked at that club. she wasn’t a bottle girl, however, she was a bouncer. during busy nights the bouncers typically took turns being at the door, and the rest would be inside the club making sure everything was fine. she didn’t mind being inside, it meant she could steal glances at you. truth was, she was into you, and it was obvious. but you took it as her just wanting to get a reaction out of you. that’s what it seemed like. but you can’t lie, whenever she wasn’t looking, you’d stare back as discreetly as you could.
she was a little possessive over you, which you weren’t really aware of. whenever she saw you flirting with customers, she couldn’t deny she felt a little jealous. she of course knew you were just trying to get more tips. regardless, she still couldn’t stand seeing the way you twirled your hair, spoke in that sweet and flirty tone, and even sometimes gave them compliments, and the fact it wasn’t towards her. she wanted it to be her, and her only. she wanted you to be hers. but she never did anything aside from flirt with you a little every once in a while, because she was scared she’d make you uncomfortable.
ellie. where does one even begin to describe her? her strong arms, her short auburn hair she styled as a mullet or put in a half bun when she felt a little lazier, her mesmerizing green eyes. from the moment you laid eyes on her you found her extremely attractive, but you were too shy and didn’t know how to approach her. what’s funny is this is the total opposite of the character you put up for your customers, an extroverted, flirty girl. the thing with you is, you can flirt with people, but only when you’re not attracted to them. when you are, such as in cases like these, the main thing you do is avoid avoid avoid. you rarely had the opportunity to interact with each other, but when you did, you always felt she was trying to subtly flirt with you. it was the kind of flirting where it was hard to tell wether she was flirting with you or just being nice, so you simply took it as being nice because you didn’t think there was any possibility she could be into you. she was just out of your league. even if it was flirting, you didn’t know if she had any other intentions. so you decided to play it safe.
that night was different from the others. your boss informed you that there’d be a bachelor party tonight and surprise surprise, you’d be serving them. the thing about bachelor parties is they’re very demanding and their tips can vary a lot. and demanding in your vocabulary is basically a synonym for entitled. they’ll insist you sit down, have a drink with them, maybe even try to grope you or something. you were not happy about having to deal with them tonight, but your boss told you they were short-staffed tonight, so you’d simply have to suck it up.
the moment the group of about 15 men came in, ellie sensed something was wrong. she rejected about half of them at the entrance before being informed by her supervisor that it was a bachelor party. she didn’t really care. she knew they were up to no good.
“i really don’t think we should let ‘em in.” she crossed her arms.
“any good reason?” he asked, annoyed.
“something just feels.. off,” she whispered, “i dunno. feel like they’re up to no good.”
“i don’t pay you to do ‘vibe checks’ on people.”
“i still don’t think we should let ‘em in. feels like they have bad intentions. have you seen how they’ve been eyeing the rest of the female staff?”
“big deal, this is a night club,” he brushed her off. “that’s how men look at women in nightclubs, williams. suck it up.”
“that still doesn’t-“
“do you want to keep your job or not?” he snapped.
she sighed and rolled her eyes, defeated, and hesitantly let the group in. her eyes were glued on them until they sat down at a table, the feeling in her stomach worsening when she realized you’d be dealing with them. it was one thing for any of the other girls to have to deal with them, but for some reason, she found herself way more worried about you. you were newer to the job and a little younger than the other girls. she couldn’t bear the thought of someone possibly harming you, or taking advantage of you, or anything like that. she felt this strange desire to protect you, something she hadn’t really felt towards anyone before. she felt this way toward you, yet she barely knew anything about you.
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
tonight was going to be a long night. the moment those men sat down, you could immediately tell. you could tell by their piercing gazes, which you swore you could physically feel even though you weren’t looking at them, that you’d have to remind them several times they can look but not touch. you heard them whispering stuff to each other while looking at you and then laughing and hitting each other as if they were a group of teenagers. you took a deep breath, put on a smile, and finally went over to their table.
“hey boys,” you greeted with a flirty tone, “anything i can get you guys today?”
“yeah, a piece of that ass.” one of them said, while the rest laughed.
you faked a giggle, trying to do your best to handle this professionally, as you would with all the other annoying customers.
“anyway,” you continued, “do you guys have anything in mind? if not, you can take a look at the stuff we have over there at the bar.” you said, while pointing at the bar.
“we’ll need a moment, babygirl.” one of them replied, holding out his credit card.
you nodded, took the card, and quickly walked away. you absolutely hated that nickname. before you took this job, you didn’t really mind it. but when you started getting called it by basically every single customer you eventually grew to hate it. if you hadn’t been working, you at the very least would’ve given them a death stare or contemplated telling them off (even though you knew you’d never have the balls to do anything of the sort.)
after a couple of minutes, one of them whistled at you to get your attention. strike two. another thing you very much hated. now you were even being treated like an animal. who the hell do they think they are?
you walked over to them and plastered a fake smile on your face and asked if they were ready.
“we just wanted to know what you recommend. i’m sure you drink lots since, you know, you work here.”
some of them chuckled, and you didn’t really get what was funny. but you decided to not start anything and just answered the question.
“well, we have lots of options,” you responded, “we have many of the classics you can find anywhere else, and we also have some that are less common. we just got the louis xiii cognac which is very hard to find, so i’d recommend that one.”
“yeah? are you just saying that ‘cause it’s the most expensive?”
“if you want less pricey options, we have those too.” you replied, avoiding the question. of course you were suggesting it because it was the most expensive. that’s kinda your job. you’re supposed to make money.
“we can afford it.” one of them said.
“yeah, bring us that one.” another chimed in.
you smiled and nodded, walking away. gosh, you felt them draining any energy you had every second you spent near them. you carefully took the bottle and put it on your tray, and grabbed a few glasses and put them with the bottle. you made your way over to their table, placing their glasses in front of them one by one, and although you weren’t looking at any of them, you knew they all had their eyes glued on you. you tried your hardest to pour their drinks quickly enough so you could just get out of there, but not too quickly that they’ll notice. unfortunately for you, they caught onto what you were doing.
“why’re you pouring so fast, babygirl? you in a hurry?”
tonight was going to be a long night.
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
ellie couldn’t wait for her turn at the door to be over. she made sure to peek inside every chance she had, but she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t eyeing you. she couldn’t help it. she couldn’t stop looking at how the black shorts and black baby tee you wore hugged your body and showed off your figure, and she had never been more grateful for the existence of the uniform. but above looking at you because of how attractive you were, she wanted to make sure you were safe. she had dealt with lots of men like them before, and she wouldn’t hesitate to kick them out if things escalated even the slightest bit.
after a while, her supervisor dismissed her and told her to stay inside to make sure nobody was causing any trouble. of course, she went over to the area you were, since there was no one watching over that area and because you were there.
“why’re you pouring so fast, babygirl? you in a rush?” she overheard one of the men speaking to you, with a sort of entitled tone. if she hadn’t been paying attention before, she definitely was now. with the way they were acting, it seemed like they didn’t notice she was there. you were clearly uncomfortable, but tried to play it off, you didn’t want to cause trouble or provoke them. she watched closely as they kept offering you to sit down and drink with them, not listening to you no matter how many times you politely told them you’re not allowed. telling you to “just have one drink, it’s fine” and “no one will know” and they “won't tell your boss.” but your boss was not the only concern. the concern was you. you didn’t know these men, you didn’t know what they could do.
but suddenly, one of the guys sitting on the edge of the seat pulled you in by the hip and forcibly sat you down. in that moment, ellie immediately went over to the table and knew she had to step in.
“sir, you’re not allowed to put your hands on the employees. i’m gonna have to ask you and the rest of your party to step outside.” she said in a stern tone.
“she willingly sat down with us,” one of them lied, “she just wanted to have a drink. nothin’ wrong with tha-“
“i saw what happened. no point in lying. now please step outside before i have you forcibly removed from the premises.”
“yeah?” he stood up to face her. “you’re just a woman. what’re you gonna do? you can’t get all of us out of here.”
“sir, back down.” she warned.
“or what?”
she didn’t respond. instead, she punched him in the face, breaking his nose. a few of his friends stood up, but before they could do anything, some of the security had already gone over to the scene and stopped them, escorting them out as ellie went with you to the break room.
“you alright?” she asked, seeing how shaken up you were.
“i’m, uh, i’m fine. don’t worry.” you responded, sitting down on the couch, still uneasy from the experience. you hated people touching you without your consent, even something that was sort of minor like this. you were already uncomfortable, and this just made it even worse. you didn’t notice ellie had sat down next to you until she wrapped her arm around you and you melted in her embrace. you felt a little embarrassed at how comfortable you felt with a girl you’ve only had small talk with prior, but you were able to push that feeling away because in that moment, you didn’t care. the fact she hadn’t judged you and said “it’s part of the job” or something along those lines, let alone saying you were overreacting was enough to tell you that you could trust her.
“do you, uh, want me to drive you home?” she broke the silence.
“i can’t. i have to finish this shift.” you mumbled. “plus, my roommate has someone over tonight. i can’t go home right now.”
“then, if you want, we can go to my place,” she suggested, quickly adding on “but just so you don’t have to stay in this environment, i’m not trying to be creepy i promise,” because the last thing she wanted was for you to take it the wrong way and be uncomfortable.
“thanks, but, i still have to go back out there and finish my shift.”
she was a little sad. if it was up to her, she’d make you quit and happily support you. she made a lot of money for a college student, between working as a bouncer and dealing weed on the side. she had more than enough to support the both of you, but she’d never talk about anything of the sort out loud.
“i can speak to management for you,” she said, “i’m sure they’ll understand.”
you accepted hesitantly, the voice in the back of your mind telling you you’d just end up fired. but that didn’t matter to you in the moment. you had to get out of there. you couldn’t stand it anymore.
ellie guided you through the back door, making sure you wouldn’t have to face those men again, holding you by the wrist with just enough strength to make sure she wouldn’t let you go easily but not too hard so she wouldn’t make you uncomfortable. she opened her car door for you, waiting a couple seconds for you to get settled in in case you needed her help for whatever reason.
the car ride was short and silent. it wasn’t the awkward kind of silence, more so the kind of silence when there’s nothing to say. it was a comforting silence, a drastic contrast from the loud music in the club that had been blasting in your ears for the past 2 or so hours. you were looking out the window, watching the city lights and buildings as you passed them. ellie would be lying if she said she didn’t steal a few glances at you when you were looking away. she couldn’t help it, you were just so mesmerizingly beautiful she couldn’t help but look at you any chance she could.
when you finally arrived at her place, you were surprised to see she had a house and not an apartment. it wasn’t a big house, but it seemed like it could house about 3 people. you were about to ask about her roommates, but almost as if she read your mind, she said;
“sorry about the mess, i uh, i live alone, so. don’t usually have people over either.”
“it’s fine,” you shook your head, “i’m just grateful you let me come here.”
she noticed you sounded like you were in a better mood. “you feeling a little better now?”
you nodded. “yeah. i guess i just needed to get out of there.” you bit your lip in worry. “but now i don’t know what to do. i’m pretty sure i’ll end up getting fired after leaving like that.”
“after what happened to you? nah. it’s understandable,”
“are you sure? i-i mean, am i not supposed to let them know beforehand-“
“you’ll be fine, don’t worry.” she reassured you. “you’re sort of new, aren’t you?”
“not really. i’ve been working there for a couple months.”
“so you’re new. got it.”
you playfully rolled your eyes. “sure, let’s say that.”
she smiled. “anyway, you wanna do anything? or do you just wanna rest?”
“i guess we could watch a movie or something,” you suggested, “if you want, of course.” you were surprised at how bold you were. it wasn’t anything too bold, sure, but that’s only true for everyone else. for you, something like that, which others might think is minor, is sort of a big deal. not only were you at this girl’s house, but suggesting to watch a movie as well. you were a bit scared that might’ve been too much.
“yeah, sure,” she replied, “you into horror?”
“uhh.. not really..” you admitted.
“it’s fine, we can just watch something else.”
“no, no, it’s fine!” you insisted. it was, in fact, not fine. especially at this time, horror was not your thing. it wasn’t a huge fear of yours or anything, but you were a little embarrassed of the fact you still got scared while watching them, sometimes even got nightmares. but no way you’d admit that to her right there. you felt you were already being too much of a burden on her, so you’d just suck it up to not bother her any further.
a few moments later, you were both on her couch watching some random horror movie she had picked out. you didn’t even know what was going on in the plot, you were way too scared. you’d argue this was one of the scariest movies, scratch that, media in general you’ve ever seen. where did she even find this sort of stuff? ellie was full of surprises indeed.
you didn’t notice you had snuggled up to her, your head laying on her chest, from the fear. once you realized, your face turned red as you pulled away in embarrassment and mumbled some apologies as you moved away. to your surprise, she lightly tightened her grip of her arm she had wrapped around you (which you only now noticed as well), telling you with no need for words that it was fine, and you could stay that way. you didn’t really know how to react to that, but you stayed. something about her was so comforting. you barely knew her, yet you trusted her as if you’d known her all your life. it was a strange feeling. you’d been on multiple dates with the same person many times before yet you still felt more of a connection with your coworker who you had only spoken to a handful of times beforehand. you weren’t even paying attention to the movie anymore. your mind was too busy paying attention to the thoughts racing in your head to process what was going on in the screen about a meter in front of you. you had lots of questions, and the more that popped up in your head, the more your heartbeat sped up.
ellie could feel something was wrong. she lightly lifted up your chin to make you face her, locking eyes with you. she asked if it was because of what happened earlier. you felt like you should look away, but you couldn’t. something about her was just so mesmerizing. you lightly nodded, not wanting to admit all the thoughts in your mind at that moment. you looked into each other's eyes for a couple seconds, before she planted a soft kiss on your lips. it was the type of kiss that happened almost as a reflex, the type that you have almost no control over. you could feel her try to pull away after realizing what she did, but before she fully pulled away you pressed your lips against hers, pulling her in this time in a deeper kiss.
before you knew it, you were straddling her lap as she placed kisses on your neck, occasionally sucking on it softly and leaving light purple marks on your skin. you hadn’t realized how much it was turning you on until you started lightly rocking your hips back and forth, desperate to get any sort of friction. ellie realized what you were doing, and placed her hands on your waist, almost guiding your movement, causing you to let out a few soft moans and whimpers.
“ellie..” you whined.
“i know, baby, i know.”
she carefully lifted you off her lap and laid you down on the couch, hovering over you. she tugged on the hem of your shorts.
“let’s get these off.” she said, as she undid the button and slipped them off you with ease, revealing your soaked cotton panties. “cute,” she thought to herself.
“i’ve barely touched you n’ you’re already so wet,” she teased, rubbing your clit through the thin cloth causing you to moan softly.
after a moment, you started to whine, tired of her teasing.
“desperate, huh?”
you broke eye contact as you looked away in embarrassment. in the back of your mind, you couldn’t believe everything that was going on. you found it a little embarassing, hooking up with a coworker you had barely spoken to prior. but as you had been doing the whole night, you tried to push those thoughts to the back of your mind and focus on the moment.
“don’t feel ashamed, pretty girl.” she said, noticing you felt a little off. something about her caring but almost demanding tone was turning you on even more.
she carefully pulled your panties to the side, sliding two fingers in, thrusting them at a slower but steady pace. this was better, but it still wasn’t enough. you bucked your hips ever so slightly, to tell her you wanted more.
“you’re gonna have to try a little harder than that, baby,” she said. she knew exactly what you meant, but she wanted to hear you say it. you whined in complaint, hoping she wouldn’t make you say it out loud.
“use your words, princess,” she smirked while locking eyes with you.
“please, ellie..” you begged.
“please what?”
“please, more..”
“good girl,” she said under her breath, speeding up her pace and thrusting her fingers inside you twice as fast as she was before, causing you to moan and whimper louder. soon you started feeling a knot forming in your stomach, making you attempt to grip the couch.
“ellie.. fuck..” you moaned.
“i know, pretty. but you don’t get to cum yet.” she smirked, suddenly pulling her fingers out.
you whined at her words and the sudden emptiness inside you, as ellie softly chuckled at your reaction. she found it so cute. she found pretty much everything about you to be cute.
she stood up, and went to grab something from her closet. it was a bright purple strap, and it was quite big. you weren’t sure it would even fit inside you. you watched as she effortlessly took off her pants and put the harness on, walking back to the couch and positioning herself, the tip right in front of your entrance.
“i want you to cum from my cock.”
she started sliding it along your slit, coating it in your slick, causing you to whine a little, before positioning it once again in front of your entrance and slowly sliding the tip inside you easily.
you were still a little scared since you had never done anything like this before. you’ve gotten fingered before, sure, but this was the first time someone used a strap on you. especially one this big.
“ellie..”
“hm?”
“i’ve never, uh,” you stuttered, “done something like this.”
“never gotten fucked with a strap before, huh?” she said, “i could tell. you seem kinda nervous. but relax, princess, i’ll take care of you.”
the nickname only turned you on more. you didn’t get why you loved it so much. it had never crossed your mind, yet you were now sure it was your favorite pet name ever.
with that, she started slowly sliding it in, looking at your facial expressions to make sure she wasn’t hurting you. surprisingly, you were able to take it all. she started thrusting it at a slow pace, gradually speeding up, but not quite fast yet. she definitely wanted to fuck you way harder and faster, but she wanted you to get used to the feeling first.
after a few thrusts you started to get used to the feeling, and it was amazing. she sped up her pace a little more, gripping your thighs, and this time she was able to locate your sweet spot, and boy was she about to abuse it. she hit it with every thrust, making you twitch and moan at every wave of pleasure.
“good fuckin’ girl,” she praised, “already taking my cock so well.”
“ellie.. please..” you begged, between moans, “faster..”
“yeah? you sure you can handle it, tough girl?”
you nodded, and she immediately sped up. she fucked you a little faster than you expected, and it was a little too much, but the overwhelming pleasure was, at the same time, addicting. the sounds of your moans and whimpers, her groans, and your wet cunt filled the room. soon, that familiar knot in your stomach started forming again, except this time it was much more intense, causing you to try and grip the couch once again. she realized what was going on, and started using her thumb to rub circles on your clit. you started tearing up from the overstimulation which was the littlest bit painful but also overwhelmingly pleasurable.
“i wanna hear you say my name, baby,” she demanded, “i know you’re close.”
and almost on cue, you came all over her cock as you moaned her name, just as she demanded, as she fucked you through your orgasm and finally pulling out with a slight pop.
— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —
it had been about an hour since you finished your.. activity. she insisted on getting a bath started for you, and now there you were on her bed, in one of her t-shirts that was a little big on you, freshly out of the bath. you texted your roommate before getting in the bath to tell her you wouldn’t be coming home tonight, and of course, she didn’t mind that at all.
not only were you on ellie’s bed, but you were cuddling her, trying to sleep. she told you you didn’t have to, and that she just enjoys sleeping with body warmth, but you knew better. maybe it was true, but it sure as hell was not the only reason. but you didn’t mind. you acted stupid and like you bought her story, because truth is, you really wanted to cuddle with her, and you were even thinking of similar excuses if she hadn’t brought it up first.
“you awake?” ellie whispered.
“mhm, sort of.” you replied, in a sleepy voice.
“i just, uh,” she paused for a moment, “i just wanted to know. when will i see you again?”
“on our next shift together.” you joked.
“no, dummy, i mean like this.”
you thought about it for a moment.
“i guess we’ll see,” you responded softly, “i’m pretty sleepy. i think we should talk about this later.”
she seemed satisfied with your response, but she still had the fear you were only saying that to be polite, and you didn’t want anything more or didn’t want this to repeat. of course, she’d respect you if that was the case, although she’d be a little disappointed. but she felt there was something more there, something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. you weren’t like any of the other girls she’s hooked up with before. she wasn’t exactly sure what set you apart from them, but she knew there had to be something.
maybe it was just feelings.
but even if it didn’t seem like that was the case because of your shy personality, you wanted something more. just like her.
2K notes · View notes
yawntu · 1 year
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Tsyeym
A/N: Yo I thought I posted this last night, took shrooms. Finally just woke back up came and checked and was like no way no one has interacted w this fic and then realized i never pressed post. Rotxo deserves more love so I decided in a little fic for him. Switch x Switch couples are just my cup of tea. This is not my fav but I am a sucker for love and romance. It’s grammarly proofread but not beta read 🤭 (might be looking for another beta reader)
pairing(s): Rotxo x f!Reader, platonic!Ao’nung x f!Reader (briefly)
word count: ~8k
warnings: NSFW / MDNI, Size kink, stomach bulge, face sitting(f!receiving), Cunnalingus, Cumswaping maybe?, Spit, he’s a messy eater you can’t tell me otherwise, beach sex, Jealous!Rotxo, he’s just so sweet and pretty, Unprotected, love taps on your butt, “girl” is used, it’s pretty soft for the most part, he’s obsessed and def a simp
na’vi glossary: sayrìp : handsome, skxawng : moron, tsyeym : treasure / precious
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Playfully scrapping had become increasingly popular amongst your friend group since you had been introduced to each other's cultures all those years ago. It was commonplace to play amongst yourselves. Just earlier in the evening you and Ao’nung had just almost spoiled your dinner by shoving each other's faces into the sand after a slap-boxing horseplay over some crustacean turned into a rather enthralling spar that had both of your fathers rooting for and coaching from an imagined sideline (and mothers who were doing more yelling and hooting in excitement then offering tactical advice).
Rotxo had even watched in amusement as it seemed Ao’nung had succeeded in neutralizing you with a knee on your back. Unfortunately, Ao’nung had been a fool and got off of you to turn to his father with a grin. It took you only seconds for you to contort yourself into a crouch and launch yourself into the back of his legs sending him forward onto his knees. His shock gave you enough time to maneuver both of your palms onto the back of his head and dramatically push his face right down into the sand,
“That is for punching me,”
And Rotxo couldn’t help the pang of jealousy at the fact that your pretty thighs straddle his best friend's back. Or the fact that jealousy grew into a painful lump in his throat when Ao’nungs arm hooks behind him to support your frame as he almost barrel rolls half onto his back to pin your thigh under his body and halt your assault with a laugh.
All your family and friends are laughing at the two of you, and your mothers coo as they watch you wipe sand off of Ao’nungs face. Rotxo couldn’t stop the bitter resentment that bubbled in his chest at the sight. He hated feeling this way. He hated the way you made him feel not quite like himself.
Which is why he does his very best at keeping it hidden. Not that it’s hard for him to forget the resentment he feels for you the second you give him your attention. Even only hours after the disgusting display of affection with his best friend. When you kindly ask him to accompany you on a walk he can’t even think about how upset he had been. Even now while your chiding voice disrupts the peacefulness of your walk and the beauty of the light beginning to set over the reef.
“You’re mad because I will not spar with you?”
He cuts off your words. The duck of the young warrior's head, so he could speak to you face to face as you walked down the beach only insults you more. Had he been on the side closest to the soft waves you’d have no doubt shoved him onto his ass into the assaulting water. Obviously that is what you were angry about-
“Is it because I cheat when I fight Ao’nung? If he is so stupid as to keep turning his back on me after all this time then he is at fault,”
You sound genuinely confused as you try desperately to make sense of why Rotxo would rough house with Lo’ak or Neteyam and even Kiri but not you. It’s funny how conceited you sound even as you’re practically bouncing next to him and pestering him like a bug. Rotxo knew a little better than most though regarding the inner workings of your mind. It wasn’t that you were conceited- you were just stupidly confident. He didn’t doubt, however, that one way or another your small frame would beat him simply because he knew you wouldn’t dare give up until you did.
“Besides the fact that I vividly remember when you bit Tinangey in the cheek,” Rotxo try’s to defend his unwillingness to hit you with an annunciation to his story by holding two of his second knuckles to the apex of your cobalt cheek. Long, thick fingers curled against your glowy skin. The same place you had bitten the longed-haired, round-faced, barely tolerable boy all those years ago when you fought. Though in your defense Ao’nung and the group of boys had started a very real fight, and you had only followed in your brother's shadow of retribution.
“And I happen to hit much harder than Ao’nung does,” he adds.
For a second, Rotxo feels like he exudes your same confidence. It’s not an unwarranted comment, however. Ao’nung was less than a head taller than him, but Rotxo had grown into quite an impressive specimen. Wide and as immovable as the waves that crashed outside of the reef you do not venture past. That was more than half the reason why you wanted to spar with the Talioang of a man so terribly.
“You are no fun,”
He can’t help but frown at your words. He knows you aren’t serious- would you spend as much time with him if you did not find entertainment in him? The same insecurity that causes resentment to bubble in his stomach rears its ugly head once more. For a second he feels like he could believe that you had been aware of how he felt and that you used him for validation.
“You should be more thankful to me,” he chides, baring his fangs slightly in a half grinned snarl, “that I refuse to knock any more brain cells out of you,”
You complain he doesn’t horseplay with you the way the others do, but at this moment he organically wraps one palm around the back of your head to pull you into him slightly, so he could cruelly rub his knuckles against the crown of your head.
Because he does roughhouse with you. Rotxo always played with you. Was always there to entertain you because the idea of other men wrapping their hands around the pliable flesh of your flowing form made the ugliest parts of him surface. If it wasn’t Rotxo entertaining you it was your siblings or his best friend. As he had not made any formal claim towards you out of his nerves, unfortunately, had to tolerate it regarding his future Olo'eyktan.
You’re just a terrible little cretin that found delight in the chaos you left in your wake. It’s why you, Lo’ak, and Kiri get into so much trouble. It’s why you poked at Ao’nung. He can swear there’s a part of you that does it just to cause strife in his heart.
He can’t be bothered with pondering over the legitimacy of his accusation partially out of fear that he’s projecting, and perhaps you are just like Ao’nung. Though mostly it’s because of course you are swatting your delicate little hand at him and grumbling about how you’re smarter than him and that he was the stupid one to think otherwise.
It’s endearing how you walk backward as the two of you playfully bicker and fight. Though like always- Rotxo is catching your intended slaps and redirecting your arms to swoop past him. Sometimes even grabbing at your forearms so you can’t help but be pulled around haphazardly by him.
“You are so fucking annoying,”
Your shriek comes as Rotxo almost effortlessly maneuvered you to spin forward and walk ahead of him, while he pinned your arms across your chest. You both stumble over each other's feet as you can’t help but laugh over the fact that he’s made your arms an effective straight jacket. You wiggle and writhe and it halts his walking while you try to dig your heel into the top of his foot. It only results in one of your wrists being let go of and you being spun around like a toy by him.
He had half let you stumble while he used the momentum of your arms to spin you, but he was quick to grab hold of your other wrist, propping you right up.
You were out of breath from the game but you were thankful for the view he presented you with. The violets and oranges of sunset suited the aquamarine of his skin. Dancing between the intricate tidal markings on his body, and forcing your eyes to dance across the defined arms, chest, and neck that were covered in bold black lines. You feel a little silly, being so flustered before him with your whole face purpled. You can help it because he looks pretty at the moment. Absolutely beautiful like always. Like no one you had ever seen before.
Rotxo is quick to heave you up in the air and shake you around. Ruining the view that had just begun to calm you down. Riling you into hysteric laughter while playing with you as if you weighed nothing. You shake in his arms and toss your body around like a mad-woman and you’re cackling just like one.
When he begins to feel merciful you land on your feet, with his arms still pining your hands and arms against your ribs that are rapidly rising and falling. With the welcomed breaths you instantly go back to chastising him.
“That is not sparring, fish-boy! You were just being an imbecile.”
You’re snapping an arm fee so you can poke him in the chest. He can’t help but roll his eyes at your attempt and take your hand to lightly ‘smack’ your face with it.
“You are ridiculous,”
He tried to emphasize his words with a similar assault by your other hand but you offered resistance,
“If you just took me seriously I-“ you’re cut off as you struggle to keep him from playfully making you hit yourself. Thrashing your head around wildly. And he’s just laughing above you because he thinks it’s stupid that you assume he just thinks you can’t fight and that’s why he won’t spar with you. For Eywas sake he watches you win regularly.
It’s like you could read his mind without tsaheylu and the mention of your victories emboldened you. He hadn’t even noticed your leg raise to wrap around his locked knee leisurely supporting his weight while he tormented you.
He had buckled backward under the weight of his massive frame embarrassingly quickly. You had expected him to let go of your wrists as he fell, but he did not. Opting to drag you down into the sand with him.
He tries to control the mauve that dances across his skin but this is the reason he didn’t spar with you. He can tell himself it’s because he hates seeing you get hit, and that his heart breaks and chokes him any time he thinks about striking you even in that situation.
He knows however, it’s because he can’t be this close to you. He can already feel his ears perking up towards you and his eyes relaxing while he stares up at you. How pretty. Your sapphire skin was dazzling under the cool violets and dwindling oranges of an almost completely set sun. The stars had even begun to twinkle behind you between the other shining moons.
“You are the worst,” your pants finally die down, to match your soft glare,
“Is that so?” His cheeks dimple as he grins wildly up at you as you adjust to straddle his chest more comfortably.
“Yes. I swing at you and you don’t even try to hit me back.”
And there’s another attitude laced plop to his chest. More follow as you use said pops to enunciate your following words,
“You just toss me around like I am useless and cannot fight! You know I can. Yet you only fight my brothers, how are you meant to get better if you don’t-“
He stops listening to your scoldings. He doesn’t care what you’re saying when his heart beats against your inner thighs. When he can feel the pudge of your hips practically pooling on him begging for him to grab at it. Why couldn’t you connect the dots? Why were you so stupid? He can’t help but laugh at you, there’s even a bit of a bitter snide behind it. Even though he thinks it’s endearing how badly you wanted to prove yourself to him. He cuts you off abruptly,
“Go and fight with Ao’nung,”
And it’s got your pretty siren eyes widening at his words.
“What does he have to do with anything,”
The sight of his sea-foam eyes rolling into the back of his head has your snarl fixed down at him,
“Can’t step on the Olo'eyktan’s toes can I? Huh?”
He has an expression you’ve never seen cross his face before. Not on Rotxo’s. Not the sweet boy who you had spent so much time with,
“What are you talking about, Ro?”
Ro. You dare call him Ro at a time like this. It makes him sit up on in elbow, grabbing at the top of your now elevated thigh,
“What do you mean what am I talking about? Why do you need to spar with me when you can practice with him? Unless it’s just some weird mating thing you guys have going on-”
He’s never seen your face screw up quite like it is now. Red-faced at his accusation not out of embarrassment but out of anger. Angry that he’d made such a brazen accusation. The first outbreak from Rotxo leaves you stumbling over how to answer him, and you notice he looks hurt at your stunned silence.
“Yeah, ‘course that’s what it is. You make it quite obvious-“ and you feel him start to move under you- probably to get up and apologize and tell you you had to walk back to the village now because even with the hurt salted embarrassment he feels now he’d never leave you to walk back alone. Never let you be in danger. You know that and it makes you more upset,
“Don’t tell me what I do and don’t make it obvious. I am not your fucking ilu- you do not know what I’m thinking.”
Your left hand reaches for the wrist of the hand that holds your thigh while your right pointer and middle fingers aim down at him accusingly.
“So you have no interest in him?”
Rotxo is speaking faster than usual. A trait you had noticed followed Rotxo anytime he was too hyped up. He was the softest boy you had ever known yet the gentle buzz of adrenaline that leaked out of his too-quick breaths reminded you that he was in fact a Metkayina warrior.
“Mhmm,”
You’re honestly surprised it has taken you this long to notice the mutual affection he had harbored for you. Blinded by your insecurities, the sight of him frantic over the idea of your affection belonging to someone else made you squirm.
“I suppose he would be a fine mate now that you mention it-” and you smile down at him, hoping he knows you’re kidding. That you just don’t know how to talk about your feelings “considering no one else seems to be all that interested in me,”
And you feel him go ridged under you, round eyes fixated on your own. You think he’s annoyed a little bit, staring dumbfounded at you. But you feel his fingers dig into the meat of your thigh.
“Was this your plan? Torment me into doing what you want?”
You don’t know if it’s the chill of the eclipses sea breeze or the fact that Rotxo’s voice was as modulated, deep, and mesmerizing as always, yet his face held the same intense stare that the Metkayina warriors were renowned for. You’re embarrassed at the way you twitch as he props both hands on your thighs and adjusts himself back into laying straight back.
“Nu-uh, but is it working?” And you're purring above him, flicking your tail across his stomach. It only added to the overstimulated feeling throbbing at the front of Rotxo’s skull. An uncomfortable pendulum swinging him between ecstasy at the sight of your pretty form sat on his chest and misery over the fact that he still couldn’t shake the insecurity that you were toying with him.
“No-“ He curses a crack in his voice with a swallow, “I will just stay tormented,”
His hands are warm as they paw at the top of your thighs. He can’t help but feel like he’s on fire at your position, at least the sand was starting to cool in the dark. It helped keep him from sweating below you even as he pants at the sight above him. Your knees are pushed under his arms and nestled against his ribs and he worries you can feel his heart pounding. You made the air hang hot around his head.
You’re nervous at how intense his dusk sullen aqua eyes maintain their contact with you but he doesn’t have a choice- if you scooted up less than a foot you’d be sat right on his face- there’s nothing he’s ever wanted more.
“Lost in thought?”
He cringes at your voice. Not knowing how you always get him like this. How you always have the high ground. He doesn’t know why he’s honest with you,
“I do not want you to fight with Ao’nung like that anymore.”
And you grin at him and place your palm on his cheek,
“Is that so? That means you will spar with me now?”
He couldn’t wrap his head around your obsession with being hurt? Did you pester everyone to fight with you like this? The thought makes his body move on reflex, craning his neck enough to open his mouth wide and comp down onto the exposed skin of your thigh. You bounce on his chest, pulling at his hair back with a whine in response.
“If you are jealous you can just say so you do not have to bite me, you child.”
He can only smile because it’s his hair you’re yanking at. You’re sitting on him and-
“I’m not jealous. Not in this moment anyways,”
One of his hands slides up your hunched forward torso, and he’s pulling you down by the woven fabric of your top. You’re not sure if he’s pulling you down to kiss him. You figure with the state of things though a kiss wasn’t an unwelcome advance, and you’re not surprised when his head lifts to kiss you back.
It’s better than any silly fantasy you had ever let yourself drift into because he’s warm and real and he’s kissing you like you’re fragile because he wants you to feel safe enough to be fragile. He wouldn’t have wasted so much time becoming a competent warrior if it wasn’t to keep you safe.
“How could you think I’d want to share a brain with Ao’nung huh? I’d kill myself.” you smile against his lips, “as if I’d ever want him over you,”
And he knows you’re not lying to him as the fluff of your tail tickles against a throbbing vein in his lower stomach. How could you be lying when you’re hunched over uncomfortably while you straddle him just so you could purr into a kiss? His big hands cradling your cheeks makes you ignore the ache in your spine, and you thank Eywa he’s so big as to add ease to the position.
By some stroke of luck, his hand travels down your spine as if to soothe the ache while your tongues swirled against each other. Despite the trembling ache that plagued your lower stomach at the endearing turn of events, Rotxo kisses you, softly. As if you’re not dying for him. Even though you straddle him his chest and move against him to relieve the pressure he inflicts on you. You’re very obviously making out with him. Willingly letting his mouth explore yours at his own pace. You can’t help but slide down his torso so you could lay on top of him properly.
You couldn’t get over how wide you still had to spread your legs to straddle his waist. Even though you laid over him caging his body under yours he engulfed you. You need to breathe far earlier than he does, and he finds it cute how you huff against his lips to catch your breath.
“You’re not going to let Ao’nung touch you anymore, ya?”
And he can’t help the dopey pitch of his voice as he catches your lips in a quick kiss. Not when you’re beaming down at him.
“Only if you touch me instead,”
You sound so coy considering you’re giggling above him. And when you enunciate your words with another kiss he can’t help the obnoxious chortle that leaves his lips- that’s until you bite at his bottom lip slightly,
“You are too bossy,”
But he kisses you the way you want him to. Pushing his nose against yours. He doesn’t think he can like anything more until he feels your hips grind against the lower abs of his stomach- that tighten and flex at the feeling of your now twitching core.
The confidence the both of you had mutually worked up to had you lost in your own world. You know it’s unbecoming of you both to be caught in such a situation but you had enough confidence in your privacy and even less confidence in your own self-control to do anything about it.
“Sit on my face,” it comes out as a gaspy whisper between your clanking teeth while you grind against him, “Let me take care of you instead,”
It makes you whimper above him and he swears it’s some sort of nirvana.
“I-I’ve never-” and you are mad at how wet the inside of your mouth is and yet it still offers no solace to the lump in your throat
“No’ gonna make you,”
You’re not sure if the sound of him slurring into your mouth makes you moan or the fact that your tail finds and runs across his erect member behind you.
“Obviously want you to,” and his palm is on your cheek, “wanted you on my mouth since you plopped down on me,”
He’s kissing you between his words and you know he means it. You can hear it in his voice. He just about died of excitement when he felt you propping yourself up on your knees.
Now that you’re back up he can admire your pretty body once again. He thinks this is the first time he’s ever seen you not take the lead. It made him blush- realizing how shy you had suddenly become. He’s gentle when he reaches for your thigh again, sliding up until his fingers reach the fabric of your tweng,
“Can I?”
You wondered how the sun would rise in the morning when it was trapped in his smile. Looking up at you as if you were Eywa herself. How could he possibly think you don’t want him to untie it?
You don’t know how to say yes without embarrassing yourself, so you do what any rational woman would do when the love of their life was laid between their legs. You reach up to the fabric tie of your beaded top, and let it fall from your body, plopping down in the sand next to you.
You can’t ignore the throb that plagues you at the widening of his eyes, how they instantly drop to your breasts. The only cover from his eyes are the few strands of hair.
You’re almost shocked at his fumbling fingers. Too excited to uncover you and too large for the delicate fabric, yet like all things that required a gentle hand- Rotxo succeeded at his task quickly. Obediently you let his palms guide your hips up. He is rewarded with one more sway of your tail over his quickly hardening length as tosses your bottoms in the opposite direction of your top.
You're breathing heavily when he cranes his neck to look at your most intimate flesh,
“Oh, Eywa,”
He can feel himself leaking all over his stomach at the sight of your bare cunt against his torso, and the warm feeling of you dripping could drive him to madness.
“C’mere, give me you.”
You listen of course. He feels bad that he likes you best like this. Tentatively crawling up his large chest to place your legs on the side of his head.
He doesn’t feel bad for enjoying the view of you hovering above his face. He can’t believe he had done this. He can’t believe you’re swollen, sticky, and wet for him.
His hands are wrapping around the fat of your thighs to pull you into open-mouthed kisses against your thighs. You’re mad it feels so good- he’s not even touched you and yet your thighs twitch where he kisses.
You reward him with a real moan at the quick swipe of his tongue from the bottom of your leaking hole right across your clit. Though he didn’t truly know what he was doing, he knew what he wanted to do. That was enough. You seemed to like what he was doing regardless. He likes kissing you. Feeling the way your lips twitch against his. His tongue finds a comfortable rhythm exploring your folds. You tasted like nothing he had ever eaten before. He couldn’t compare you to anything else- and there wasn’t a thing in Pandora he’d rather in his mouth.
Though you're panting and wiggling your hips in front of his face he still wants to give you more. Wants to wrap his arms around your thighs and take care of you the way you should be taken care of. He doesn’t know why he has such a need to take care of you, especially since you had caused him so much grief. He knows you’re more than willing and capable of handling him mating you without any of this - but he can’t help it. He wants to spoon-feed the world to you; do everything for you. Even if it means doing all the work to get that pretty pussy of yours to cum in his mouth.
His desire to take care of you is probably why one of his big hands finds your hips. Why it slides across your smooth skin and his thumb hooks under your tail to push you down and forward onto his wanting mouth.
“I said sit-” he speaks into your cunt, the vibrations of his voice making you clench your stomach.
He can feel his dick jump at the way you cry at the feeling of him grinding your sensitive pussy against his wanting mouth, legs clamping down against his blood-rushed ears. When he finally slides his tongue into your twitching hole again he can’t help but reach down to squeeze at the base of his throbbing dick. Just for a second, he could pretend you were clamping down on his cock and not his rapidly exploring tongue. You’re too busy following along with the motion Rotxo’s hand around your tail provides for you to notice what he’s doing, however. When you’re so blissed out that you lean back to brace your hands onto his chest he can’t help but take in the sight of your thrown-back head. Your hair was behind you now and he could watch the night sky illuminate the swell of your breasts. He can’t be bothered to feel bad at watching you so vulnerable and unaware when he’s the one to cause it.
With the added space of you leaning off of him slightly, he was able to drag his face across your leaking cunt as if he were a starved animal ripping into a meal.
You feel dirty- for the way your head quickly snaps forwards to watch the way he shakes his head back and forth between your legs. There’s no hiding the mess below you at this point. The twinkling night does little to hide the slick connecting you to him. And you feel yourself leak even worse when his relaxed eyes blink open and he catches you staring at him. When he slows his movements to take in the look on your face.
“Ro- don’t- Rotxo-“
Embarrassment is evident in your voice despite the fact he feels like his face is burning brighter than yours. He can’t seem to wrap his head around the fact that you’re sitting on his face, you’re letting him eat you out.
He wraps his lips around his new favorite part of your body, sucking the nerve into his mouth with a cruel pop. Kissing it after you cry out,
“You feelin' good?”
His words are soft, as you feel his thumb caress the underside of your tail. You only try to sit back down on his face with a wiggle of your hips. Rotxo has finally found a happy middle ground where he felt confident with you, however. Gripping your tail tighter to keep your greedy cunt off of his face.
“Answer me,”
And with his words comes a gentle graze of his sharp teeth against the pulsating sticky skin of your clit. He’s never heard you make the noise that responds to his assault. A cry or a hiss he wouldn’t know- but it was his new favorite sound. He’s only licking you- it’s only at the work of his tongue that your legs are shaking so prettily on his cheeks.
“Yes- yes you know I am-“ You start, “can you keep going now?”
It’s the fake polite voice you use that makes him scoff. He finds it endearing how badly you try to grind yourself against him in the same rhythm he had previously helped you with. But with his grip on your tail, and the punishingly slow strokes of his tongue against your slit you stayed bubbling on the edge. You’ve never been so pliable for anyone before, he thinks. He’s never seen you so whiney over anything.
“Rotxo please!”
Your please is a little too mean. It wasn’t you asking him to make you feel good. You were being bossy and rude. Red face screwed up in frustration as if you had still been scolding him for the fact he wouldn’t hit you. Maybe it’s why his other hand leaves your hip for a second to swat at the fat of your ass.
Between you sidling forward onto his face, and the fact that your pretty little tail wagged across his painfully hardened cock he couldn’t help but moan right into you.
The guttural moan of his deep voice sends a shock wave up your body that has one hand digging into the sand next to his head and the other hand pulling at the mess of curls on top of his head. Maybe he understood your annoyance at his stubborn desire to hold back before. Because right now you are doing the same.
All he wanted was for you to cum. So one hand returned to your pretty tail to help you grind your clit against his face. It was cute how you tensed at the feeling of the tip of his fingers that had risen up against the hole that so willingly leaked all over him. You don’t even give him a chance to ask if you’re okay with it before you sink back into his fingers, ruining the kiss Rotxo had just begun assaulting your clit with.
The sight of spit connecting his swollen lips to your cunt, and the feeling of one of his finger reaching deeper in you than you had ever been able to touch makes you tremble above him. He’s rocking you against his face while he begins an almost punishing assault on your hole.
In his defense, he wasn’t truly aware of how punishing the pace was. The only thing he was focused on was the steady ripple of your ass against his knuckles. So blissfully unaware of how much louder your voice had gotten. The wet sound he was greeted with as he slid a second finger inside you only spurred the speed of his hand more.
“I- I… Ro I feel-”
And he feels the tip of your tail softly lay across his aching cock as though to anchor yourself as you arch forward into his face, thighs trembling. He moans at the ache of his scalp as you pull him into you and he can’t help but open his eyes wide.
Eywa is Rotxo glad he did. He knows he’s going to remember this for the rest of his life- the view of your pretty legs choking him in a vice grip and pussy clenching up on his fingers while you practically scream. You don’t listen to yourself though, not when you’re preoccupied with the sound of him slurping against you. As if he’s never enjoyed something more- and he’s smiling against you as he alternates, scraping his teeth against you, and sloppily kissing you though your orgasm. All while his fingers still slowly curl inside of you.
You feel like you should be embarrassed, panting above him- trying to force oxygen into your deprived lungs and brain. He doesn’t make you feel awkward though. Not even for a second. Not while he’s petting your thigh and smiling up at you between his movements.
“You’re alright?”
The hum of his voice was questioning. You couldn’t help that part of you felt as though he was telling you that you were alright though. Maybe that’s why you felt so at ease.
“Better than alright,”
Your coquettish grin has him pawing at your thighs to scoot you back down off of him. Even though he’s never enjoyed doing something more than taking care of you, the feeling of your tail twitching against the tip of his throbbing cock had raised an unfamiliar pain in his stomach. Besides, the sinful sounds you had been making for him; the pretty dazed face had coaxed you into had made him confident enough to not want to be under you any longer.
You instinctually wrap your arms around his neck as you feel him begin to sit himself up. One arm wrapped tightly under your ass (giving himself the luxury of wrapping one of his meaty palms around the meatier fat of your ass) to keep you from sliding down into his lap until he had sat up completely, and could position you comfortably.
You can’t help but smile at how disheveled he looks. His hair is all askew from you yanking at it and his face is completely blushed and wet from all the effort. The way the corners of his lips twitch into a smile by the time your bare slit makes contact with him is almost mischievous in a way. As if he was expecting the gasp that falls from your lips as he drags you down across the tweng that painfully constricts the parts of him that hadn’t hardened out of it. It finally relieves some of the pressure knotting at the pit of his stomach. You could never wrap your mind around how sitting on his lap could be so calming yet intimidating. You can’t help but reach for the sand covered curls at the back of his head pulling desperately to fill the gap the height difference caused. Wanting nothing more than for him to bless you with another kiss.
Of course, he obliges. He doesn’t think he could ever deny you a single thing now. Not when you’re grinding down onto him while kissing him. Dragging the fabric across the both of you, and Eywa when you run your tongue across his lips with a giggle he has to stop himself from cumming between the both of you.
Feeling the way his tip leaks against your belly button has your heart beating so impossibly fast that the rattling it causes in your rib cage hurts.
“We do not have to do anything else,”
He doesn’t want to remind you. He really does not. He wants nothing more than to sink you down onto him- but he doesn’t want you to feel pressured. To feel unsafe. If you had never touched him again he’d have lived happily with this moment like gold in his memory. He thanks Eywa however, when you whine at the insinuation, thread your fingers around his kuru, and your pretty snarl makes contact with his own teeth.
“Don’t make me go and find Ao’nu-”
You don’t even finish your hiss before he swats at your ass again, appreciating the way your skin recoils, and thighs tremble at his sides and for you to yelp into him. How dare you say his name with your hand where it was? Has he been too nice to you these years? Too gentle with you?
“Watch it,”
You had heard Rotxo growl before. Never at you- but you had seen what he was capable of when he did get aggressive with people. Yes, he was a sweet and gentle boy- but he was also rowdy, brawling, and all too bellicose. But because he was normally so saccharine to you, you had forgotten all about the rest of Rotxo. Big, honorable, and strong Rotxo who you had seen slam down elder warriors with years of experience on him like they were weightless. Those same muscular, intricately tattooed arms were now using the fat of your hips and ass to grind you down against him. As if to make up for the cruelty of your words your other hand reaches down, and though you had frustrated him he can’t help but buck his hips into you at the feeling of your hand sliding down the hood of his cock so you could run a thumb across his exposed tip.
“I want you. I thought I was being pretty obvious. Reya makes fun of me for it.”
You don’t know why you whisper to him, you don’t think you had ever been as soft-spoken before.
“I am just stupid-”
And his frustrations leave him at the feeling of your hands loosening around both his hand and kuru. He can’t help but slide his face against yours, slotting his nose against yours. He breaths against your face once before he speaks,
“You are not a stupid girl,” and there’s a kiss placed on your cheek under your eye as one palm raises to cradle the opposite one, “you are at least smart enough to undo a knot, yeah?”
He keeps his usual warm and syrupy baritone voice, yet there’s a condescending undertone to his voice that shoots straight down to your core. It makes your ears flatten against your head, and your eyes widen. He was almost bitter that all it took to intimidate you was to imply he wanted to impale you on his cock. Why did he waste all this time becoming such a revered deep-sea diver and warrior?
“Or are you, pretty girl?”
There’s more jest in his voice; his heart swelling at how cute you were when you weren’t being a menace. So cute in fact that he can’t help but kiss the crown of your head as he watches both of your hands reach down to untie his tweng. He supposes he could have just yanked it down, but he can’t help the rush that flows through him at the sight of you doing it. He swears he’ll ride this high for months- felt like he could fight a nalutsa all by himself.
That’s until he sees you sit up on his knees and realize what you’re going to do- what you want to do. It finally sinks in for him. You want him. Your fingers are on his kuru, your cums on his face- you chose him. Suddenly the sea breeze isn’t enough to keep him from overheating. He’s too aware of the sound of the waves and the sand that covers his back and hair and the fact that-
“Sayrìp,”
His eyes instantly leave your swollen pussy and raise to your face, locking with your eyes obediently. You smile up at him and he’s sure his pupils are as wide as yours.
“Are you okay?”
How can he not be okay when you're kissing his mandible? Teeth teasing against the pulse you’ve risen should drive him to dizzying madness but only acts to ground him back into reality,
“Jus’ cannot believe you’re here with me.”
It gives him a chance to swallow the lump in his throat,
“Who else would I be with, skxawng?”
And you're grasping at the base of him to hold his heavy leaning cock steady; he whines at the sight of your spit drooling past your pretty lips and hisses at the feeling of it plopping against him. He supposes you could use all the help you could get if you hoped to take him.
As you slide the girthy blunt tip against your slit he rewards you with a moan. A deep sound that reverberates against his chest. It makes you all too eager to try and sink down onto the tip.
But Rotxo’s arms are stronger than you and he doesn't want you to do that, so he uses that strength against you. Despite being so giving and nice on the regular, rolling over and letting you boss him around and do what you wanted he was going to mate you the way he wanted to, and you were going to take it.
When the jolt of his hands moving to hold your hips in place makes your pussy flutter against his tip he has to remind himself of that before he loses all of his resolve and pushes you down onto his length in one swift movement. The thought made him cringe. He didn’t waste all this time opening you up for him just to hurt you,
“You going to let me mate you, tsyeym?” He asks
If you think you could roll your eyes without invoking the hunter's wrath you would have. He was acting as though you hadn’t been pulling and tugging on his prettily kept braid since you had first felt his imposing length against you.
“I am not above begging,”
Though you’re chuckling softly in his ear your fingers are dancing down his kuru, and when your finally twirl the ends of his hair covering his tswin around your slender fingers he can’t help but slide just the first couple of inches of him into you. He can’t tell if he feels your fingers caressing his nerves more or the far too-tight ring of your pussy sucking him into you.
“Ma’Rotxo-”
Your free hand braces yourself down on his bicep, digging your fingernails into his flesh as if you’re the one overstimulated.
“Thought you were tough, huh?” He chides, “Wanna fight with me but can’t even take me bullyin’ my cock into ya, huh?”
If you were mean you would have tugged on his braid, giving him a semblance of the perineum sting you felt at the girth of him-
“Don’t be an asshole to me, Rotxo.”
You’re trying to be bossy still and it doesn’t suit the fact that your body feels so pliable in his hands. He doesn’t even dignify you with an answer, not when he wants you to be flush against his hips. Not when he wanted you to feel as much of him as you could before he made you feel even more. He feels a little bad that you’re so small in comparison to the Metkayina people. Though an embarrassing part of him loves the idea of spending the rest of his life drilling into your warmth until you’re molded to him he worries about how sore you’d be in the morning. He promises himself that he’d be extra kind to you tomorrow- tend to anything you could want. He will take care of you as a thank you for the way you were about to let him use you.
You couldn’t think of a time when Rotxo hadn’t taken care of you- this felt no different. So when you feel one of his hands caress you on the mission to reach around your body and pull you apart further so that more of him could slide inside all you do is huff and give into his guidance.
“Look at you,”
He sounds winded at the feeling of you clenching against him. You’re surprised he enters as easily as he does. Surprised the pressure doesn’t hurt as bad as you feared it would. Especially when one of his thumbs moves over your clit in soft quick motions,
“Just gotta relax a lil’ more.”
His eyes are fixed down; watching you take him inside of you. He doesn’t even care anymore that the end of his braid is held in your soft hand. He ignores the uncomfortable throb that shoots through it. He only has to endure seconds more of it before he’s rewarded with the slippery plap of your hips meeting. He feels bigger than ever when your hands leave their respected body parts to grab at his cheeks. He’s sure you meant to kiss him but you only managed to moan against his open mouth.
“That’s my girl,” he kisses you, “Took it all so good.” another kiss,
“Fucking Metkayina- too big,” Of course, you’re grumbling right now. Of course, you have a grumpy little voice even when he’s in your guts.
“You are rude,” one of his arms wrapped around you and pulled you flush against him, partially to appreciate your warmth but mostly so he could reach around and grab your own braid.
“Shouldn’t even touch this now, huh?”
His soft eyes give him away, and he knows you know him too well. You know that once you pull his braid over his shoulder that he’d rush to bring yours closer.
You were right of course, he’s quick to hold the bioluminescence of your tswin’s tendrils painfully close to his own. There’s something that makes your stomach tighten painfully at the sight. There was something so exciting about the fact that you were so close to being with him- all you had to do was dip your hand forward. The thought has you rolling your hips down against him to alleviate the throb of your clitoris. It’s all he needs before his other hand leaves your hip to grab your wrist that holds his tswin.
“Look at me,”
You’re so good for him. So obedient when your eyes instantly snap from where your hands almost make you one- to his eyes. He thinks you’re so beautiful. Sultry and warm and so undeniably wild. So easily he gives into the magnetic force that’s been trying to convince him to pull your tswin into his.
He thinks his heart stops at the way your eyes haze over and you melt into him. The way you practically purr as he feels his lap grow wetter. Now you were all of those things- but you were also his.
“Oh, Eywa,”
He feels bad for how roughly his one arm pulls you into him, he feels how much fuller it makes you feel but he has to feel your heartbeat against him. He thinks this is bliss- that he can’t get anything better than this. Then you begin scooting your hips back and forth against his. His hands are too quick to reach for your hair, digging his fingers into it.
The pretty way your face screws up as your pace quickens has him star-struck. The echo of your pleasure tickled his lower stomach. He can’t help but lift his hips to meet yours; the slapping sound of skin as you bounced against him is enough to spur him into near madness. Both of your throats are caught- stunned in silence over the sheer amount of feeling tsaheylu adds.
He feels bad because he knows you feel so good going at your own pace and using him to fill yourself to your heart's content. He can’t focus on that guilt when he has such an uncontrolled need to be on top of you. His hands halting your hips have you confused, and you’re only more shocked when he’s heaving you up and tossing the both of you until your back is against the sand and your hips are hiked on his firm thighs.
He doesn’t even give you a second to take in the change, slipping himself all the way into you in one fluid movement, palms returning to the fat of your hips so he could roll and grind down into you. He loves the way you clench as he rolls across your g-spot. The view is beautiful, and the way your hands reach between your thighs and rub your fingers against yourself for him only drives him further into ecstasy.
“So pretty for me,” He loves how easy it is to make you clench and throb. “My pretty mate,”
His eyes are fixed on the way your breasts bounce at the power of his thrusts and the way your stomach bulges. He knows if he focuses on your pretty face he’d be finished the way your wide eyes don’t focus on anything and the dark purple stain of your blush. He’s never quite seen your markings glow so bright. He’d never live down finishing before he even got a chance to fuck you properly- before he could really appreciate the view. So he grabs at your hips and wiggles you side to side in an effort to stimulate you further,
“Let me fuck you for real now baby,” and his hand travels up your legs that are bent against your bodies, straightening one leg over his shoulder so he could kiss your calf. How could you say no when he asks so sweetly while he was so deep inside of you?
“Please? Can you please move again?”
He forgot you could be so polite when you want to be. He’s all smiles, starting at a comfortable pace. His speed picked up quickly as he could use your whole leg as an anchor, but he still stays relatively shallow. Just to give you enough time to adjust before he picks up a punishing pace.
He knows he’s fucking you entirely too loud. He knows the way you moan under him is entirely too loud. He knows the nighttime waves aren’t loud enough to drown out what he’s doing to you but all it does is spur him on. He wishes you’d be louder but he knows you have more dignity than he does.
How can he slow down when you’re telling him he’s so good? You’re gasping as he falls forward onto one hand for more leverage. Still holding your hips up by one leg so he could slam into you. The change of position has you dragging sinfully across him and it almost distracts you from the sound of his grunts. It was magnifying seeing him worked up over you- he wasn’t even in a rut and had desired you so deeply.
“Gon- Shit. Roxto 'm gonna cum,”
The way he reacted to your words is what sends you over the edge. The way he hunches over and begins to slam into you while his eyes bore into yours. The sloppy sound of you cumming all over him and your eyes rolling into you head bring him closer more than the feeling of you clamping down on his cock. He didn’t think you could squeeze tighter and it’s embarrassing how easy you make him cum. Just barely enough time to slip out and shoot himself all over you.
He means to hit your stomach honestly, expecting it to pool where you had been slightly folded. Except he had forgotten how worked up you had gotten him- how badly he had wanted to cum in you. The sheer amount that painted your warm stomach and azure boobs should have embarrassed him but the sight of his cum shooting further and globbing on your chin and lips consumes him. You lay half folded under him, grasping onto him while you panted. Covered in his cum. No one could get near you without knowing you were his.
He can’t help but act on his desires and lean down to cage his big arms around you. Running his tongue up your chin and across your lips. You taste the salt on his lips when he immediately kisses you, and at the bite of his teeth, you’re opening your mouth so he can spit him into your mouth.
It should be raunchy and make you feel like a whore but he does it so softly and kisses you so libidinously that the swirl of his tongue against yours has you both purring into each other's mouth.
You’re perplexed at how quickly he’s back to sweet Rotxo. Kissing you gently and caressing skin that just knew the punishing grip of his strength.
He’s tall when he sits up on his knees, and now that he’s not hunched over rutting into you it truly dawns on you just how much bigger he is than you.
He scoffs as he looks around him and you’re almost confused until you watch him lean over to grab both of your bottoms before he’s grinning down at you and scooping his hands under you.
His cheeks hurt from smiling at the sound of you giggling foolishly at him as he heaves you into the air. You're both red-faced and covered in sweat and sand and he can’t wait to walk into the cooling water with you in his arms.
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feelmyskinonyourskin · 9 months
Text
Fight Club
Pairing: Matt Murdock x (AFAB)Reader (with platonic Frank Castle x Reader)
Summary: @hellskitchenswhore is killing it with the prompts lately. Per her request: Matt's freaking out thinking you might be cheating on him because for the last few weeks, you’ve been coming home smelling like Frank. What he doesn’t know is that you asked Frank to teach you how to fight and didn’t tell Matt.
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Warnings: 18+/SMUT. No use of Y/N. Female/AFAB reader (use of terms like girlfriend and female anatomy.) Established relationship. Brief mention of an active shooter at an office, Frank and Matt using pet names like sweetheart, mentions and accusations of cheating but no actual cheating, Unprotected sex, Fingering, P in V, Creampie, and Possessiveness from our dear Matt. Sort of getting caught after the fact.
Notes: I started taking kickboxing like three weeks ago, so I like to pretend that qualifies me to know what I'm talking about (It doesn't lol). So apologizes if I got any of the terminology wrong. UPDATE DEC 2023: I wrote an alternate ending to this fic that ends in a threeway with Frank that you can read here
WC: 5,000
*I never give permission for my fics, manips, or any other original creation I post on this site to be copied, posted elsewhere, translated, or fed into any AI program. The only platform I currently post anything on is Tumblr. Thanks!*
“That’s it sweetheart, last round I promise.” Frank encourages you as you take swings at the bag in front of you. 
You’ve been at this for at least an hour and your arms feel like jello. You can’t remember the last time you were breathing this hard that wasn’t from Matt bending you in half. Jumping directly into the Hudson would have kept you drier than the amount of sweat currently pouring down your face and exhausted body.
“Atta girl, atta girl!” Frank praises as you take your last few swings, arms too weak to make any real movement of the bag
“Alright, you’re getting the hang of it now. Few more sessions and you’ll be out there with Red every night.”
“Pfft I don’t know about that, Frank. I’m just trying to make sure I can protect myself is all.”
“So remind me again why you didn’t ask him to teach you this?”
It started last week. One of your favorite coworkers was going through a bitter divorce and her estranged husband decided to confront her at the office and pulled a gun. You heard two shots ring out from your desk and feared the worst - all the active shooter situations you'd seen on TV were happening live in your life. Fortunately, as you fled for safety, Jerry from accounting was able to disarm and tackle the guy before he could hurt anyone thanks to his black belt in Jiujitsu.
Even though the incident ended okay, it had spooked you enough to get yourself some defense classes, for all those times when your vigilante boyfriend was too far uptown to protect you at a moment’s notice and Jerry wasn’t around to save the day.
Matt was always overprotective of you and you hated to think how he’d react to the incident, so you hadn’t told him. When the story hit the news, you lied (via text so he couldn’t detect it) and said it happened on a different floor and you didn’t even notice. 
You also didn’t tell him about your decision to learn self-defense. Matt was more than qualified to teach you, but for some reason, you just didn’t feel comfortable asking for his help with this. Maybe it was his propensity to throw himself into helping those he cared about, you especially, that gave you hesitation to give him another thing to prioritize over himself. Maybe it was just how good he was at fighting that made you not want to “be a beginner” in front of him (not that Matt would ever judge you about anything.)
In fairness to you, you hadn’t intended to learn it from his frenemy and former client, but you’d showed up at the boxing gym near your work and the gruff men inside intimidated you so much, you bolted out the door before signing up for a class, tears welling in your eyes when you quite literally bumped into Frank on the street.
“What are you doing here?” he asked, nodding towards the door of the boxing gym
“I thought… Look I want to learn how to fight. Or at least how to defend myself. This place is close to work but um… might not be the right fit for me.”
“Why don’t you just ask Red?”
“It’s a long story,” you replied with a sigh “but I really don’t want to ask him. Or for him to even know about it. So can you please not mention you saw me here or we had this conversation?”
“Okay, can I ask why not?”
“You can but I’m not gonna answer.” 
Frank chuckled and shook his head
“Well if you want to learn to fight, this isn’t the best place. I know Vinny the owner and he’s a shit teacher. But if you want to learn for real, I’m happy to teach you.”
“What? Wait really? Wait, Frank you know how to fight?”
“Sweetheart, I was a Marine for over 15 years, ‘course I know how to fight.”
“And you’d do that for me?”
“Course. You’re Red's girl. What times’ he leave for his little night job?”
“9:00”
“Great, meet me here at 9:30. Tonight.”
And that was how you ended up here, collapsing on the gym mat beneath you with a groan.
“Not bad for your first time. We just gotta get you in the habit of resetting your hands after every hit, and you’ll be golden” Frank praises again
“Oh yeah, I forgot, always protect the face so I don’t end up lookin like you.” you jest
“Ouch” he feigns hurt with a smirk on his face “Red teach you to swing low like that?”
“Nah Castle, that’s all me. It’s part of why he loves me. Same time tomorrow?”
“Sure. See you then.”
By the time Matt returns home, you’re showered and in bed, sore muscles pulsing every time you twist and turn in your sleep. Between the smell of sweaty clothes in the hamper and the scent of your freshly washed skin rubbing against silk sheets, plus the heat radiating off your sore muscles as he crawls into bed silently beside you, Matt figures it out pretty quickly.
‘She started going back to the gym. Hmm. Have to ask her about that in the morning.’ he thinks as he drifts off beside you.
You awake in the morning to gentle hands rubbing at your back. 
“Mmm morning Matty” you mumble, still pulling yourself out of sleep
“Morning sweetheart.”
“What are you doing?” you ask as he works a little lower down your spine
“Giving you a massage. I can tell you’re sore. When did you start going back to the gym?”
“Just yesterday. And you’re right I’m super sore. Thank you, this is a nice way to start my day.”
“Of course sweetheart. What gym did you go to? Did you have fun?” he inquires
His innocent prodding has you waking fully quickly, trying to cover your tracks without outright lying and getting caught.
“Oh this gym near work. Couple people in the office recommended it. And yeah I had fun.” 
All truths.
“That’s nice. Mmmm do you want to start the coffee or shower first?” he asks, seemingly letting the subject go
Perfect.
As you rush around to get ready for work, Matt grabs the laundry hamper from the bathroom, walking it over to the washing machine. Your dirty workout clothes from the night before sit on top, now less potent that they have completely dried. But he can’t help but feel like something smells off.
Sure it smells like you - natural scent mixed with your fading sweat, but there’s something else. Something familiar. A very subtle hint of spiciness mixed with… is that gunpowder? 
‘Weird’ Matt thinks to himself, but brushes it off a moment later, the smell not strong enough to really garner more than a passing thought.
But three times he does the laundry in a row, he smells it. It’s so subtle, he might not even give it another thought, but it’s just so damn familiar. 
It takes another week for him to ask you about it.
“Hey sweetheart, you’ve been going to the gym a lot lately,” he mentions over dinner 
“Mmmhmm. Yeah, can you feel my muscles growing? I’m feeling stronger.” you reply
“Yeah. What exactly are you doing at the gym? It’s really working.”
“Oh a little cardio, a little strength, you know…” you skirt around, being intentionally vague
“That’s good. Is it like a class or?”
“Um sort of. Just this guy at the gym, he’s been helping me. You know, walking me through the exercises.” 
Also technically the truth.
“That’s good. Well, I’m glad you found something you like.”
‘Okay, so that guy must smell like this. She’s close enough to him in a warm sweaty gym, so there’s a little bit on her clothes. Makes sense.’ Matt thinks to himself. But he still can’t shake the feeling that that smell is so familiar.
Two weeks later, Matt is out on patrol when he hears a familiar heartbeat on the fire escape a few floors down from where he’s perched.
Frank.
“You just gonna sit there all night, listinin’ Red?” Frank asks
“Very funny Frank.” Matt says, hopping down to Frank’s level
“Haven’t seen you in a while” Matt comments
“Been busy. Madani’s been usin’ me more.”
“Oh don’t tell me you’re going legit Frank.”
“Not a shot in hell, Red. But gotta pay the bills somehow.”
And then a strong breeze blows. Frank’s signature blend of sweat, aftershave, and metallic mixed with gunpowder from all the weapons he handles overwhelms Matt’s nose. Matt cocks his head in confusion. It’s so damn familiar. But of course it is, it’s Frank. How many times has Matt been on a rooftop with him like this, bs-ing the night away while monitoring the city?
After catching up for a bit, they go their separate ways, the rest of Matt’s evening turning uneventful.
He returns home to you shortly after 3 am, your soft breathing as you sleep calms him as he strips off his suit. 
You hadn’t met with Frank tonight. He said something about following a lead and you were perfectly fine with that, you needed an off day. 
Matt curls up in bed beside you, resting his head on your back and falling asleep quickly.
The next night, Frank is really putting you through your paces and you swear you’re ready to collapse when he finally calls it for the night. 
Per usual, Frank offers to walk you home when you’re done and for the first time since you started coming here, you accept the offer since you stayed a bit later than usual tonight. At least until you can make it to Hell’s Kitchen and within range of Matt. 
You and Frank make small talk as you go and eventually, the chill of the autumn air has you shivering in your still-damp-from-sweat workout clothes. 
“Here sweetheart,” Frank says with a lopsided smirk, slinging his worn jacket over your shoulders. 
“Thank you Castle. Always a gentleman.”
“Course, ‘specially for Red’s girl.”
You make it to 35th and 10th, close enough to home and hand his jacket back to him, parting ways with a nod and a polite “goodnight.”
The later hour coupled with the particularly intense session has you collapsing into bed without even removing your shoes, let alone your gym clothes.
When Matt returns a few hours later, the smell hits him like a truck. 
‘I swear to god Frank, if you’re bleeding on my couch again…’ Matt thinks to himself. 
But when he enters the apartment the only heartbeat he can hear is yours. He inches slowly toward the bedroom and rolls the door open gently. He reaches down to feel the soft lycra of your leggings on your body, careful not to stir you from your slumber. The smell of your sweat clinging to your clothes fills his senses, way more potent than normal plus that other scent you’re bringing home from the gym. Matt pauses to wonder why he thought Frank was here but then it hits him. 
Oh my god. The mystery smell from the gym you’ve been bringing home is Frank. 
But how could you smell like… 
And then the gears in his head start turning. And he feels like a goddamn idiot. 
You had been going to the gym. But not to work out. You were cheating. With Frank of all people. And you’d made the critical error of not showering when you got home. 
Matt begins to pace the apartment, rubbing at his chin as his thoughts move a million miles a minute about what to do. 
Did he confront you? Did he confront Frank?! What should he even say?
The sun rises and he’s still pacing and contemplating when his alarm rings out. He shuts it off before it can wake you too. He needs more time to think about his next move. He gets ready for work quietly and slips out the door before you awake. 
You find it odd you haven’t heard from Matt all day. When you woke up you saw his Devil suit in a heap in the living room and there was no damage to it or blood on it. So you knew he had come home and was relatively okay. But it was so odd for him to leave without a goodbye kiss or go this long in the day without so much as a text. But he had been busy with a heavy caseload lately. You finally break shortly after lunch and text him first. 
“Hey Matty. Know you’re busy but I miss you and I love you. Dinner tonight?”
“Can’t. Working late. Don’t wait up.” He responds
That was… oddly curt. But again you figure he’s stressed and busy. 
Matt on the other hand has been wracked with stress all day. It only took an hour of his constant pacing and fidgeting for Foggy to break and finally ask.
“Matt. What’s up?”
“I think… I think I’m being cheated on.” Matt confesses. He leaves the Frank part out of the equation, wanting Foggy to be as objective as possible about his response. 
“What could possibly make you think that?”
“She’s been going to the gym like every night for a month now right when I leave for patrol and she came home last night smelling like… another man. And she’s been smelling like it a little the whole month but last night it was all over her”
“So did you ask her?”
“Well no but…” 
“Matt you are literally a human lie detector and yet here you are jumping to conclusions instead of doing the rational thing and just asking her.”
And maybe Matt would have taken Foggy’s advice if he thought you were just cheating with your gym trainer. But this was Frank. And that made it all the more complicated. 
Matt decides finally what he’s going to do. He’s going to follow you tonight, catch you in the act and confront both of you together.  
Matt still hadn’t come home when you depart for your nightly workout session, but little did you know he’s there. Pacing on the roof, waiting for you to leave. As soon as he hears the lobby door shut behind you, he springs in to action, taking the stairs two at a time into the apartment and changing out of his lawyer suit and into his devil suit as quickly as possible, making sure not to lose your heartbeat now a block and a half away. He makes up for the lost distance quickly and is practically on top of you by the time you enter the gym. 
“Hey Frank” you call out as you enter
“Hey. I’ll be over in a second.” he replies from the locker rooms
Matt crouches down by the side of the building, just close enough to the windows to hear everything going on inside. 
You’re almost done wrapping your hands when Frank emerges from the locker room. 
“Alright let’s start with our usual, then you can have a go at me again.”
“I don’t know Frank. You really wore me out last night. I woke up still in my clothes and shoes.”
Matt knew it. He fucking knew it. 
“Tough shit sweetheart,” Frank responds with a chuckle. “And what did your boyfriend think about that huh? He got any idea what we’re doing here yet?”
“Honestly I don’t know. I didn’t see or hear from him at all today. Which is weird even for him. And no I don’t think he’s figured it out yet.”
“You’re gonna have to tell him eventually”
“No, I don’t”
“So what you’re just gonna keep sneakin’ around, becoming a prize fighter without him gettin’ suspicious? Shit even a regular guy would raise some alarm bells by now, but especially Red and all his … shit”
“Frank, I am not here trying to become a prize fighter. I’m just trying to get strong enough to defend myself if he’s not around to do it. That’s all”
Matt’s heart drops. 
How could he possibly think you were cheating? And with Frank of all people. He felt like an idiot. Like a total asshole. Sure you had lied, well, technically withheld the truth and he’s sure you’ll explain why. And he’s hurt if you wanted to learn to fight that you didn’t come to him.  But this was not nearly as egregious a stain on your relationship as he thought it was. 
“I don’t know. Think you should tell him. Show him your moves. Shit, you’ve gotten a couple good hits on me these last few days I’m sure you could give Red a run for his money.” 
“I am not fighting Matt, Francis.” You say with an eye roll
Matt listens for the next hour as Frank talks you through a few hitting drills, then the two of you sparring. Frank is clearly taking it easy on you, but Matt is still impressed by what he could tell of what you were doing. He absolutely would need to take you on to really gauge your skills. 
Franks's phone rings out just as you’re cooling down with some stretches. 
He answers and speaks for a few minutes. 
“Alright sorry to jet out of here but Madani has somethin urgent for me. You good to get home alright?”
“Yeah, thanks Frank. See you tomorrow.”
Frank gives you a fist bump and then disappears through the front door. Matt uses the opportunity to sneak in just before the door slams closed behind Frank. 
You’re sitting on the floor undoing your wraps as he finally speaks up. 
“If you wanted to opportunity to hit Frank, I’m sure I could have arranged it some other way”
Your spine goes icy cold at the sound of the voice behind you. 
“Matt… I” you stumble to explain. 
“It’s okay sweetheart,” Matt says, hands up in surrender before reaching up to remove his mask
“What are you doing here?” You ask, ready for him to chew you out for your little secret. 
“Alright if I’m honest, do you promise you’ll be honest?” He asks
“Yes.”
“I followed you here because I thought you were cheating. With Frank. And I know now that’s not what’s happening. And I’m sorry for not just asking you.” He confesses with a sigh
“Oh Matt. I’m so sorry that I did anything to make you think that. That’s not at all what’s happening here.”
“I know. Been listening all night so I know. But I have to know why. Why are you doing this and why didn’t you tell me? And Frank? Really?”
“It’s a long story. Can I tell you while we walk home?”
And so you do. By the time you make it home to your apartment, you’ve come clean about the incident at work and running into Frank and how he’d been coaching you the last few weeks, and why you were so hesitant to ask Matt to be the one to do it.
Matt is oddly quiet through your explanation but nods as you speak. He finally speaks up just as you’re unlocking the front door. 
“I forgive you. And I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t ask me. But now that I know, I am curious…”
“You want to see how much I’ve learned?”
He nods enthusiastically 
“Fine. I guess since now you know you can join us tomorrow. If you want.”
“Perfect, I’ll be there”
He tucks you in to bed with a gentle kiss before heading out on patrol again, no longer clouded by doubts about your relationship. 
When you arrive at the gym the next night, Matt is already there, looking extra adorable in his gray sweatpants and messy hair. 
It’s all so familiar to him - the buzz of the fluorescent lights, the smell of sweat and heat, the gym mat sticking beneath his bare feet with every step. Just like Fogwells when he was a kid. He feels at home here.
“Hey sweetheart” he greets you with a kiss
“Hey Matty” you can’t help but smile whenever you see him after a long day “Frank texted me, he’s running late, but um do you want to help me warm up?”
Matt’s face lights up with excitement. “Yes. Okay. What does Frank normally have you do?”
“Two rounds of jab crosses on the bag. Three minutes each.”
“Okay, have at it”
You wrap your hands and begin hitting the bag. Not even thirty seconds in, Matt speaks up.
“Woah woah woah. Frank has been letting you hit like this and not correcting your form?”
“Yes. Wait, what the hell is wrong with my form?”
“You’re too far away from the bag. I can hear your shoulder joint rubbing every time you jab, which means you’re over-extending that left arm. Makes you put way too much energy into each hit, you’re gonna wear yourself out way faster. Here. Step closer.”
Matt moves behind you to help you correct your position, then lets you take a few more punches.
“See? More power, less effort.”
“Yeah. Any other pointers?”
Matt places his hands on your shoulders and places his feet right beside yours, pressing his body tight against your back. You never thought of boxing as particularly erotic, especially not with Frank teaching you. But with Matt’s breath against your ear, you can’t help but feel a chill run down your spine straight to your core.
“Go ahead, gimme a few more, I want to feel how your body moves. See just what else Frank has been teaching you wrong.”
“Matt…” the words die on your lips. You want to speak up and defend how kind Frank has been these past few weeks to spend the time to teach you, but Matt’s sweet whisper of encouragement has you forgetting anything else but him.
“C’mon sweetheart, don’t get all shy on me. You hesitate like this for Frank?”
“N..no.” you stutter, then weakly throw out a few more punches
Matt chuckles, knowing just how much he’s winding you up with so little. 
“Put a little more power behind them. Don’t let me being here hold you back.”
You try to do as he says and throw some real hits, but Matt is still pressed right against you.
God, his body is warm usually, but being flush behind you as you move and hit, he practically feels like white-hot iron against you. Your heart is thumping out of your chest, and it’s not just from the few minutes of warming up you’ve done. You know Matt can hear it and is going to play you like a fiddle. His own wicked form of punishment for not telling him about your training.
His hands drop from your shoulders, running down your back lightly and coming to rest on your hips. He plants a soft kiss right under your ear.
“You’ve been working hard. Maybe Frank does know what he’s doing.”
He places a second kiss a little lower down your neck.
“You throw any actual punches at him yet?” he asks
“A few. Landed some of them too.”
A third, fourth, and fifth kiss down your neck, working his way toward your shoulder. His stubble is coarse against your skin, sending goosebumps across your flesh, your toes curling into the squishy mat beneath you.
“Mmm that’s my girl.” he says, as he begins sucking on your neck, his right hand snaking around to your front, tickling at the top of your leggings.
“Matty” you chastise
“What?” he feigns ignorance
“Matthew. Do not start something you can’t finish. Frank will be here any minute.”
“You said he’d be late.”
“His text said ‘a few minutes’ and that was already several minutes ago.”
“Well I can’t hear his heartbeat yet, so we’ve got at least five.”
You want to protest more, you really do, but you just can’t resist Matt. 
Laughing low, he nuzzles into the crook of your neck, his steady breath against your exposed skin a stark contrast to the growing labor of your exhales. You spread your legs a little wider. He takes the invitation and reaches his hand fully into your leggings, using a finger to circle your sensitive bud.
You throw your head back onto his chest with a moan, his name falling from your lips in a breathy whisper.
He continues to suck on your neck as works at your core, finally sliding a finger inside you, then another.
You reach forward to grab the boxing bag for stability, Matt’s touch causing you to writhe enough that you’re not sure you’re able to stay standing without it. As you thrash against him, he inhales deeply, a mix of your natural scent and your arousal consuming his lungs. 
In order to get you exactly where he wants you, he keeps a quick pace, knowing he does not have a lot of time. His rhythm never falters, stroking you over and over in that perfect spongy spot inside you. It’s not long before you're coming apart with a cry of his name.
Just as your head stops spinning and you’re returning to earth, Matt is turning you around and connecting his lips with yours. So hungry to have you, he guides you back a few steps, never breaking his lips from yours, and pushes you against the wall behind you.
His kisses grow more and more desperate, sending an electric tingle down your spine, though that could also be because the wall behind you is made of mirrors and the glass is cool against the heated skin not protected by your sports bra.
As soon as you make contact with the wall, his hands are back on your hips, pushing your leggings and panties down in a heap on the sticky mat beneath you. His clothes soon follow.
You throw your leg up and around his hip, opening yourself to him. An offer he quickly accepts. A soft gasp simultaneously escapes both your lips, the relief between the two of you as he guides himself slowly into your wet and eager core until he’s fully sheathed inside you. Restless fingers reach down to wrap your other leg around him, now fully holding you in the air against the mirrored wall behind you. 
He repeats the pace of his fingers only moments ago and slams into you harshly and quickly, over and over again, desperate to feel you release around him again, knowing Frank could appear at any moment. 
God, your familiar warm heat is absolute perfection, he thinks as he continues to bury himself into you over and over again. You’re still incredibly worked up from your previous climax and it takes just a few thrusts for you to be close again. The way your body is clamping around him and tensing lets him know just how close to ecstasy you are again.
Matt leans forward and you can feel his quickening breath against your ear once more.
“Damnit sweetheart, you scared me so bad. Made me think I was sharing you with someone else.” he grunts as he continues to drive his hips against yours.
“No Matty. I’m yours. Only yours — oh God. I promise.” you whimper back, arching into him further.
“Good. But to make sure you don’t forget, I’m gonna cum inside you, right now and every single night before you leave. So I’m dripping out of you after every hit, every kick. No matter how much Frank trains you. So you remember exactly who. You. Belong to.” he growls lowly against your skin, pushing you even more firmly against the cool glass with every thrust.
“Yes. Please Matt — Fuck. I’m all yours. I promise. Please.”
He thrusts one more time before he cums with a rumble of your name, his arms tightening around you, holding you impossibly close as he releases inside you just as he promised.
As he grinds against you in just the right way to hit that perfect spot one more time, your own orgasm sweeps over you. Your nails dig into his back, holding on to him as you let go, his harsh thrusts now slowed just enough so he can keep the both of you upright.
He feels you release, causing a final low groan from him, slowing down his pace, as your molten pleasure fades away. Still consumed by him and the feel of him holding you close, you lean your head back to rest against the mirror behind you as you catch your breath. Just as you feel like fully slumping against him, he sets you down gently.
You don't even really register him pulling away from you until he speaks. 
“Might want to put your pants back on. Frank’s a block away and I don’t think you want him to know how I warmed you up before he got here.”
You open your eyes and see that Matt is already dressed, a smirk painted across his face as he listens to you scramble to put your clothes on.
Just as you’re adjusting your leggings back in to place, Frank and his large frame enter the gym.
“Hey –” he pauses at the sight of you and Matt in front of him, both sweaty and still panting a little.
“Hmmm. Guess Red knows now.” Frank grumbles
But then his eyes go wide.
“You wanna tell me what that’s about?” he asks with a point of his finger.
You can feel the heat rising in your cheeks as you turn behind you to see what he’s asking about. The mirror is covered in smudges that look vaguely like the outline shape of your body.
“We don’t talk about what happens at fight club…” Matt jokes as you bury your face in your hands in embarrassment.
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goldengalore · 1 year
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Hardest to Love
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Summary: Harry and Y/N are broken up but still good friends. He worries that he’s holding her back from moving on and finding love again, so he tries to distance himself from her. But Y/N is too sweet and people are too dumb to treat her right. Stuck between his fear of hurting her and his desire to give her the love he knows she deserves, Harry finds himself in a difficult predicament.
Word count: 8.7k
Warnings: some kink-shaming, mention of cheating, angst, smut (dom!harry, bondage, choking, spanking, degradation, orgasm denial, teasing)
A/N: This fic was inspired by two songs by The Weeknd: Hardest to Love and Scared to Live. Also, Y/N is bisexual in this one—just mentioning this for anyone looking for bi!Y/N fics :)
***
Harry hasn’t been good to Y/N.
The awful realization dawns on him while he’s sitting in a cafe with her one afternoon along with their two friends, Elena and Jordan. Well, actually, they’re more Y/N’s friends than his. He met them through her and only hangs out with them when she’s around. He may not have much in common with them, but whenever Y/N invites him to hang out, he always says yes because how could he turn down an invitation to spend time with her?
At least after Elena and Jordan leave, he gets to have her to himself. Not today though. Today, Y/N announces prematurely that she has to head home. Harry’s shoulders sag in disappointment.
“Whyyy?” he whines, resting his chin on his ring-adorned hand. “What could possibly be more important than spending time with your mates?”
She smiles. “I have a date tonight.”
Her three friends eye her with curiosity.
“Ooo, is it that guy from Tinder you’ve been seeing?” asks Elena.
“Yes, but don’t get too excited. I’m ending it with him.”
“What? Why?” they all ask, almost in unison.
She shrugs vaguely. “I realized he’s not my type.”
Elena snorts. “You say that about everyone you date. What even is your type?”
“Him,” says Jordan, pointing at Harry, who just chuckles.
Y/N’s cheeks flush. “I just haven’t found the right person! Leave me alone.” Her phone vibrates on the table. She checks it. “Oh, it’s him. He’s asking if our date is still on.”
“Poor guy,” says Jordan. “He’s got no idea he’s about to get his heart ripped to shreds tonight.”
Y/N rolls her eyes. “Please. You’re acting like he’s in love with me. We’ve been on two dates.”
“I don’t know. You’re pretty easy to fall in love with,” says Harry, smirking at her.
Her cheeks turn even more pink as she attempts to bite back a grin. “Okay, I have to go.” Rising to her feet, she grabs her phone and pulls her bag over her shoulder. “See you guys!”
“Good luck tonight, heartbreaker!” Jordan shouts after her as she walks away.
“I can’t with this girl.” Elena shakes her head. “I thought I was picky with dating.”
“She wasn’t always that picky. It was only after Mr. Grammy Award-Winner over here came along,” says Jordan, nodding his head towards Harry.
The comment elicits an awkward laugh from him. “What do you mean?”
The two friends exchange looks. Harry hates when they do that; he always feels left out of the joke.
“You do know that you’re the reason Y/N keeps turning down all the people she dates, right?” Elena says, as if it should be blatantly obvious to him. “She’s still not over you.”
He scoffs. “That’s ridiculous. We’ve been broken up for eight months. She’s been seeing new people for four of them. Don’t reckon she’d be doing that if she wasn’t over me.”
“It literally could not be more obvious,” says Jordan. “She goes on dates with people, then she hangs out with you for five minutes, and oh, all of a sudden, those people are no longer good enough for her?”
Shaking his head, he leans back in his chair and crosses his arms. “I think you’re reading too much into it.”
Elena sighs and tucks a strand of her pink-dyed hair behind her ear. “Look, ever since you told her that you’d be willing to get back together with her when the time feels right, she’s decided—either consciously or subconsciously—not to give anyone else a chance. It doesn’t help that every time the two of you are spotted anywhere, Twitter acts like you’re back together again.”
“Y/N doesn’t even use Twitter,” he says, purposely deflecting now.
“You know that’s not my point.”
“So, what then?” He throws his hands up in defeat. “What am I meant to do? Stop spending time with her?”
“That, or you can just tell her you’re not open to being romantically involved with her again,” Elena suggests. “Until you say something, she’s never going to move on.”
He won’t admit it to them, but he knows they’re right. He too has noticed Y/N’s pattern of going on a couple dates with someone, then conjuring up some excuse for why she can’t envision a future with them. Everything from “he’s a snorer” to “she thinks bald cats are ugly” to “he uses too many exclamation marks in his texts.” And Harry is guilty of enabling this behaviour by telling her that it makes total sense to turn someone down for such trivial reasons. 
Truth be told, he likes watching these other people try and fail to win her heart. It gives him a sick sort of satisfaction to know that for her, no one compares to him. But he recognizes the deep selfishness of these feelings, and it’s something he doesn’t like very much about himself.
Harry and Y/N’s relationship has been complicated from the start. They met at a wedding. Harry was fresh out of a year-long relationship, and in no way, shape, or form was he ready to jump into another one just yet. But how was he supposed to resist Y/N, who looked like a fairy in her pretty floral dress and had a voice sweeter than honey and blushed whenever anyone said anything remotely nice about her and made him laugh harder than he’d laughed in weeks, maybe even months?
He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t resist. So, he pursued her until she fell for him hard. And he fell for her too. And they had the most magical three months together, attached at the hip whenever possible and constantly texting each other when not. But the spark began to fizzle out once Harry realized, and Y/N did too, that he hadn’t completely moved on from his ex.
Y/N was so understanding, albeit heartbroken.
Harry went off to Japan for a few weeks to focus on himself and his music. She was on his mind the entire time, so much so that his ex began to feel like a distant memory from another lifetime. On his first night back from Japan, he called her. And it was as if nothing had changed between them; they picked up right where they’d left off.
Over the next couple years, their relationship was a turbulent cycle of breaking up and getting back together, rinse and repeat. It was almost always Harry who would get cold feet and call it off when things began getting too serious—a habit he’d developed after getting his own heart broken too many times.
He could see the effect that this back-and-forth was having on Y/N, how it was wearing her down and sucking the liveliness out of her. He didn’t want to cause her any further pain, but he didn’t want to completely lose her either.
When they broke up for the last time, he told her that maybe now just wasn’t the right time for them to be together. They could still remain friends, and perhaps in the future, if the time ever felt right, they could try again.
He knows that Elena’s suggestion of telling Y/N that he’s not romantically interested in her anymore is the most sensible thing to do. However, he can’t find it in himself to do that. Instead, he decides to create a bit of distance between him and Y/N, hoping that it’ll be enough to help her move on from him. 
Only time will tell if his plan works.
***
Y/N is pissed off. She doesn’t get angry very often, so when she does get like this, she doesn’t quite know what to do with herself.
Last night, she invited a few close friends over to celebrate her recent promotion at work. While Harry initially promised that he would be there, he texted her last minute that he couldn’t make it because he wasn’t feeling well. 
This morning, as she was scrolling through her social media, she stumbled upon a picture taken by a fan of him leaving a pub last night with his friend Ben. He appeared perfectly fine and healthy, making it abundantly clear that what he’d told her was a lie. This isn’t the first time he’s cancelled on her in the past few weeks. She just assumed it’s because he’s been super busy with work, but now she feels stupid and naive for thinking so.
The discovery of Harry’s lie made her so upset that she got dressed that morning and drove straight to his house to confront him. Now, as she stands on his porch, waiting for him to answer the door, a sudden sense of self-awareness comes over her. 
She’s never been a confrontational person. Showing up on someone’s doorstep unannounced to go off on them isn’t like her at all. She hasn’t even thought about what she’s going to say. 
Just as she’s considering turning around and sprinting back to her car, the door opens to reveal a freshly awoken Harry, dressed in the fluffy lavender robe that she always loves seeing him in because he looks extremely soft and cuddly when he wears it, like a big, purple teddy bear. She has to resist the urge to squeeze him in her arms.
“Y/N, hi,” he says, brows perked in surprise. “Wasn’t expecting you this morning.”
“I just came to check up on you and see how you’re feeling.” She forces a smile and observes his reaction closely.
At first, he just stares at her blankly. Then it suddenly hits him, his eyes going wide as saucers. “Oh! Right, yeah, I’m, uh, I’m feeling much better. Thank you.”
Liar.
Y/N’s lip almost quivers from watching him lie straight to her face, but she maintains her composure.
“Must’ve been pretty bad, huh?” she asks. “Since you had to cancel so last minute.”
He looks down and fidgets with a loose thread on his robe. “Yeah, I wasn’t in the best state. Threw up three times.”
Her brows arch up, feigning surprise. “Three times! Wow! And you still had the energy to meet Ben at a pub on the other side of town?”
His face falls.
Y/N drops her facade now, letting her true emotion show. “You know, if you didn’t want to hang out with me, you should’ve just said so. There was no need to lie.”
“It’s not that. I love hanging out with you... Probably more than anyone else I know.”
“Then why did you lie? And why have you been so distant?”
He looks past her shoulder. Since she got here, a light drizzle has started, tiny droplets pattering softly against the ground.
“Let’s talk inside,” he says.
A stubborn part of her wants to keep her feet firmly planted on his porch, but it’s cold out here and the warm interior of his house does look incredibly inviting right now. She steps inside, taking off her shoes on the mat before marching into the kitchen.
He shuts the door and joins her there. “Do you want to sit?”
“No.” She leans against the edge of the kitchen counter and crosses her arms. He stands across from her, his hands resting behind him on the kitchen island.
She can’t help it. She has to say it, “It’s not fair, you know. I’ve always supported you and been there to celebrate your successes. I know getting a promotion at work isn’t nearly as exciting as getting a Grammy nomination, but still—”
“Don’t do that.” He shakes his head. “Don’t put down your accomplishments like that.”
She shrugs.
“I’m sorry I lied. And I’m sorry I’ve been distant. I just...” He hesitates. “I feel like I’ve been holding you back.”
Her brows furrow. “Holding me back from what?”
“From moving on. From falling in love again. I feel like the more time we spend together, the more you struggle to connect with the people you go out with. When we broke up, I told you that I’d be willing to get back together when the time felt right, and I said that because I still wanted you to myself, even if I didn’t want to commit to an actual relationship. And I realize now how shitty that was.” He sighs and stares down at the floor, seeming ashamed with himself. “I don’t want to sabotage your chances at finding love. Don’t want to be that guy.”
His explanation takes a minute to sink in and wrap her head around.
“So, wait,” she says, “you think I haven’t fallen in love with someone yet because I’m still hung up on you?” She laughs a little. “C’mon, H, that’s a tiny bit egotistic, don’t you think?”
He lifts a shoulder. “Maybe. But Elena and Jordan think so as well.”
She scoffs. “Oh, so now the three of you are, like, the committee of experts on my love life? What, do you meet once a week to discuss all the reasons why my love life is a flop?”
He blinks at her slowly. “Y/N...”
“No, no, this is stupid.” She uncrosses her arms, clutching the counter behind her instead. “You are not the reason that I can’t fall in love. You’re... You’re...” She finds herself grasping for some way to convince him that his whole theory is absurd, but suddenly, she’s not even sure if it is. In the end, all she’s able to say is, “You’re my best friend.”
His green eyes soften. “And you’re mine. But maybe...” He winces, like he knows the next part is going to hurt her. “Maybe, staying friends after the breakup was a bad idea.”
This feels like a punch in the gut. It’s like experiencing their breakup all over again, except worse because the pain of losing a best friend is somehow more visceral, more agonizing than losing a romantic partner.
“You don’t mean that,” she says brokenly. 
“I’m just saying that we should try spending some time apart and see how that works for us. If nothing changes, fine... But if something does, then maybe it’s for the best?”
Swallowing the lump in her throat, she says, “Fine. If that’s what you want.”
He says nothing to reaffirm her statement, making her doubt for a moment that this is really what he wants, but then she snaps herself out of it. No, he has made it clear that he doesn’t want to spend time with her anymore, and she’s not going to chase after someone who obviously doesn’t want her around.
“I should go.”
He follows her to the front door. They both stare out the window at the rain, which has escalated from a light drizzle to a full-on thunderstorm within a matter of minutes.
“It’s pouring out there,” he says. “Do you want to wait until the rain stops?”
“No.”
“Well, do you at least want an umbrella?”
“No, thank you.” She’s being stubborn, but she doesn’t want to be around him any longer than she has to. After slipping on her sneakers, she steps out onto his porch and makes a run for it to her car but gets drenched by the time she ducks into the driver’s seat.
***
The next time Harry sees Y/N is three weeks later at a mutual friend’s birthday party. They’ve developed so many mutual friends over the years of knowing each other that they’re bound to cross paths at one point or another.
She arrives at the party a little while after him, accompanied by Elena. Her sleeveless maroon dress hugs her curves perfectly and brings out the natural pink tint of her cheeks. Her hair is shorter too, he notices. He tries not to stare when she walks in, but it’s hard not to. They make eye contact from across the room. She looks away before he can lift a hand to wave hello.
For the entire evening, every time he enters a conversation that Y/N is also a part of, she discreetly withdraws. Any time he even comes close to her vicinity, she drifts further away from him. It’s frustrating. But he probably deserves it after how poorly he handled things with her. Lying to her instead of just having a candid conversation about his concerns. 
While he’s receiving the cold shoulder from her, Elena appears to be receiving quite the opposite treatment. Y/N sticks by her side the whole night, holding hands or linking arms with her, sharing longing glances, blushing whenever Elena speaks directly to her. He suspects there’s something going on there, but he can’t be sure. There is one person at the party, however, who might be able to give him the answers he seeks.
“Hi, Jordan,” says Harry, walking up to the short, dark-haired man who was oddly standing by himself in one corner, staring down at the phone in his hands.
Jordan glances up at him for a quick second. “Oh, hey, what’s up?”
“Not much. You?”
“Just sexting with this hot older guy I met last week,” he replies casually, his thumbs flying across the tiny keyboard on the screen.
“Oh. Nice,” says Harry. He’s not sure how to bring up the topic subtly, so he decides to forgo subtlety altogether. “So, um, Y/N and Elena...”
“I’m as shocked as you are.” Jordan laughs. “Who would’ve thunk those two would ever hook up?”
“Are they serious or...?”
“Depends who you ask.” Jordan glances up again and registers the confusion on Harry’s face. He elaborates, “If you ask Y/N, she’ll tell you they’re serious. If you ask Elena, she’ll tell you it’s still early days and too soon to say.”
“Huh.” He looks in Y/N’s direction again. This time, she’s resting her head on Elena’s shoulder, listening intently to whatever conversation was happening around her.
“Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck,” Jordan suddenly says.
Harry whips his head back around. “What?”
“The guy I’m sexting. He just sent me a video of him putting his dick in a—”
Raising a hand, Harry says, “You know what? I don’t think I want to know.”
Later that night, everyone gathers around to sing happy birthday to the birthday girl and watch her blow out the candles on her huge, extravagant cake. Afterwards, as the crowd disperses around the house again, Harry loses sight of Y/N. He decides it’s for the best since he’s spent most of the night watching her from afar instead of enjoying the party and mingling with friends he doesn’t see very often due to his busy schedule.
From that point onward, he tries to be more present in his conversations with people.
When he breaks away to find the bathroom a bit later, he passes by a room that looks like a den. The door is slightly ajar, enough to make out Elena sitting on a couch with a few other people. Y/N is nowhere to be seen, though she could be in some part of the room that isn’t visible from where he’s standing. But as he listens in to their conversation, it quickly becomes clear that she’s not in the room with them.
“Where’s your shadow?” asks one of the other girls sitting with Elena.
“Who?” she says.
“Y/N. She’s been following you around like a lost puppy all evening.”
“Oh, yeah, I don’t know where she went, actually.” Elena looks around vaguely. 
Harry steps away from the door before she can see him. He leans against the wall next to the doorway, taking out his phone so that if someone catches him standing there, he can pretend he’s just messing around on his phone.
“The two of you are a couple then?” asks the other girl.
“I wouldn’t call it that,” replies Elena. “We’ve just hooked up a few times.”
A male voice chimes in, “What’s she like? In bed, I mean. I’ve always wanted to know, but she was always with that Watermelon Sugar guy.”
Harry rolls his eyes at that.
“She’s kind of a freak, actually,” Elena speaks in a hushed voice, like she’s revealing a scandalous secret.
“Oh yeah?”
“Uh-huh. She’s into that choking, slapping, getting tied up, being called names type of shit.”
Harry rolls his eyes once again. These must be the most vanilla people ever if they think liking a bit of bondage and degradation makes someone a “freak.” Most of the people he’s been with were into things like that, not just Y/N.
“Damn,” says the male voice. “It’s always the sweet, innocent-looking ones.”
“Yeah,” says Elena. “It’s kind of weird, but I just go with it. At least I can laugh about it later.”
A grimace has settled onto Harry’s face after hearing their conversation. He doesn’t appreciate the way they talk about Y/N, as if she’s some sort of anomaly or a sex object. He knows all too well what it’s like to have your sex life dissected and gossiped about by people who don’t even know you. 
It especially irks him when he remembers how insecure Y/N used to be about her kinks when he first met her. It took her some time to open up to him about what she liked in bed because before they met, she’d never had the chance to explore her deepest desires and fantasies in a safe space with someone who made her feel comfortable. He’s grateful that he was able to give her that.
Now, he leaves to go find the bathroom again, but when he gets there, it’s already occupied. He heads upstairs to find another one. The music from the party fades as he ascends the staircase. It’s mostly dark up there, except for the warm white light spilling out of a room down the hall. As he gets closer, he realizes it’s the other bathroom and, of course, someone is inside this one too.
He groans internally until he reaches the open doorway and realizes that the person inside is Y/N. She’s standing in front of the sink, fixing her hair in the mirror. Her gaze shifts to Harry as he appears in the hallway.
“Hey,” he says softly.
“Oh, sorry, do you need the bathroom? I was just leaving.” She starts to exit, but he steps in the middle of the doorway, blocking her path.
“You’re avoiding me.”
She meets his eyes reluctantly. “Well, I didn’t know if I was allowed to talk to you or not.”
He frowns. “What? Of course you are.”
“Just wondering, you know, because we’re not supposed to be spending time together anymore.”
“That doesn’t mean we can’t talk if we see each other at a party, Y/N.”
“Well, how was I supposed to know?!” She crosses her arms in front of her chest. “These rules are confusing.”
His eyes wander over her face, taking in her pretty features. “They are confusing,” he agrees, pausing before adding, “and stupid.”
“Oh, so now you admit it.” A playful grin dances on her lips, making him chuckle.
Lifting up a hand, he takes a strand of her hair between his fingers and twirls it around, examining its length. He notices her breathing stop for a moment.
“You cut your hair,” he states.
“Yeah.”
“Looks nice. Pretty.”
She blushes. “Thanks.”
He releases the strand of hair and watches it bounce back into place. Then he reaches up and brushes his fingers against her cheek. She leans into his touch, almost on instinct. His gaze rests on her lips now—so red and full and tempting. He begins inching towards them, but at the last moment, she pulls away.
“H,” she whispers, “we can’t. I have a girlfriend.”
“You do?” he asks, even though he already knows what she’s about to say.
“Yeah. Elena. We’ve been seeing each other.”
“Oh,” he says. And he tries to control himself. He really tries to stop the words from leaving his mouth, but they come out anyway, “Y/N, I don’t think she’s right for you.”
“What?”
“I don’t think Elena’s a nice person.”
She frowns. “Where is this coming from?”
He doesn’t want to tell her about the conversation he overheard earlier. It would only hurt her. “I just think you deserve better.”
Her eyes narrow. “And what exactly is ‘better’? You?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“Then what are you saying, Harry?”
He can sense her losing her patience with him. Y/N, who normally has the patience of a saint and puts up with a lot more than most people would, is done with his shit.
“Because you told me that you were worried about holding me back from moving on and finding love again. But now that I’m with someone new, you’re telling me that I’m with the wrong person? It’s just— It’s not making sense. You say that you don’t want to hold me back, but that’s exactly what you’re doing.”
Her words pierce through his heart. “You’re right... It doesn’t make any sense. And I’m sorry. But I stand by what I said about Elena. She doesn’t have your best interests at heart, lovie. She doesn’t deserve you. Neither do I.”
She stares at him for one long moment, a tenderness flashing in her eyes for the briefest second before she looks away. “I can’t do this.” She squeezes past him to leave the bathroom.
“Y/N—”
“Bye, Harry.”
***
Settling in bed with a book in his hands, a cup of chamomile tea on the nightstand next to his phone and his songwriting notebook, which is always there in case a lyric idea pops up in his head while he reads. This is how Harry spends most of his nights lately. It’s a soothing ritual to come home to after a long day. 
The only thing missing is having someone in bed next to him. Someone to read with or read to. Someone to kiss goodnight. Someone to hold as he drifts off to dreamland.
Ever since his breakup with Y/N, he has been taking the time to figure himself out, to really look inward and, with the help of his therapist, work on some deep-rooted bad habits that he seems to carry from one relationship to the next. He’s never been good at being alone, which explains why he has a propensity to dive into a new relationship before he’s even moved on from the last.
He regrets rushing things with Y/N. If he’d just taken the time to get to know her and properly befriend her before taking the next step, things might have panned out differently. He truly believes that.
A yawn pulls itself from him as sleep begins to fog his brain. He places his book on the nightstand. Before he can turn the lights out, his phone buzzes with an incoming call. It’s Y/N. 
He picks up. “Hello?”
He doesn’t receive an instant response. All he can hear is the beat of some techno song in the background and the muffled sound of female voices. He wonders if she just butt-dialed him by accident.
“Hellooo?”
This time, he hears her say on the other end, “You were right.”
Puzzled, he replies, “What?”
“You were right about Elena. She’s not a nice person.” 
She doesn’t elaborate any further, but he can infer from the hollowness in her voice that Elena broke her heart.
“I just called to tell you you were right,” she says. “You can feel all smug now and say ‘I told you so.’”
“You think I’m that much of an arsehole?”
She sighs and mumbles, “No.” He hears her sniffle. “I just don’t get why everyone treats me like I’m some toy they can play with and throw out when they get bored. Am I that easy to discard? Or maybe I’m just hard to love.”
“No. You’re not.” If anything, that’s me, he thinks to himself.
“Then why does this keep happening to me?” She sounds so defeated, it makes his chest physically ache.
“Because, Y/N, people are stupid—and I’m including myself in that statement—and they don’t realize what they’ve got until they lose it. By the time they realize it, it’s far too late.”
She goes quiet. He can hear the music thumping in the background again.
“Where are you?” he asks.
“In the bathroom of a club.”
He quirks a brow. “What are you doing at a club? You don’t even like clubs.” He recalls her telling him once that she hates being surrounded by all the sweaty bodies bumping into each other.
“Jordan dragged me here. Said the best way to get over a heartbreak is to go to a club and find a stranger to hook up with. But he ditched me as soon as we got here, so I thought I would just drink and dance away my sorrows, but then some creep tried to grope me on the dancefloor and I wanted to throw up and now I’m hiding in the bathroom.”
“Fuck’s sake,” he mutters under his breath. His frustration isn’t directed at her but at Jordan for giving her such terrible advice and then abandoning her in such a vulnerable state. “Stay where you are. I’m on my way.”
“Wh— You’re coming here? You don’t have to do that.”
“Well, I’m doing it.”
He gets the name of the club from her and tells her he’ll text her once he’s there. Climbing out of bed, he quickly throws on some clothes and heads out to his car.
He’s prepared to go into the club to retrieve her when he gets there, but she’s already standing outside by the curb, rubbing her hands up and down her arms. She has on a flimsy jacket, far too thin to block out the cool night air. As soon as he pulls up, she climbs into the passenger seat, finding refuge from the cold.
“You all right?” he asks, studying her intently.
She nods. “You know, you really didn’t have to come all the way—”
“Hush. Put your seatbelt on.”
She raises her eyebrows at his authoritative tone. “Yes, sirrr.”
He feels something stir inside him when she says that but quickly squashes the feeling and starts driving.
“Do you want me to take you to your flat?” he asks.
“Ugh, no. Jordan’s going to come home with some guy in the middle of the night and wake me up with obnoxiously loud sex noises.”
He nods once. “Okay then. My place, it is.”
When they reach his house, he prepares one of the guest bedrooms for her to sleep in while she uses the bathroom. By the time she comes out, he’s sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting patiently for her. She sits down next to him. As he turns to look at her, he catches her staring directly at his mouth.
“Kiss me,” she says.
“You’re drunk.”
“Just one kiss. Please?”
He rolls his eyes and gives her a peck on the lips, forcing himself to pull back before he gets carried away. “Happy?”
“No, I want more,” she says, leaning forward.
He smirks and squeezes her chin between his thumb and forefinger. “Greedy girl.” He releases her chin. “Go to sleep.”
She complies and gets under the covers. Staring up at him with her sweet, tired eyes, she says, “Thank you. For taking care of me.”
He shrugs. “I like taking care of you.”
He gets up then and leaves the room, shutting off the lights as he goes.
***
Y/N wakes up with a miserable headache compounded by a deep embarrassment over her actions from the previous night. Calling up Harry just to whine about her pitiful love life, prompting him to come rescue her drunk ass from the club, begging him to kiss her...
She wants the ground to swallow her whole.
Eventually, she drags herself out of bed and into the bathroom. After cleaning herself up, she heads down to the kitchen, where Harry is sitting at the island in his purple robe, having his morning coffee. The sight is all too familiar to her; she used to wake up to this on a regular basis when they were still together.
“Morning,” he greets her as she walks in, avoiding his gaze. “How are you feeling?”
“Hungover.”
She fills up a glass with cold water and savours the feeling of it pouring down her parched throat. Finally, she turns around and forces herself to look at him.
“Sorry about last night,” she states. “I was, um, a bit of a mess.”
He gives her a kind smile. “It’s all right. You don’t need to apologize. Honestly, it made me quite happy to see your name pop up on my screen when you called.”
Her heart swells. “Really?”
He nods and takes a sip of his coffee to hide the timidness in his expression.
A smile spreads across her face. “Well, okay, that makes me feel better.”
He gazes at her for a while, like he’s carefully contemplating his next words. “So... You were upset last night and I didn’t want to ask, but... What did happen with Elena?”
Her eyes drop down to the floor at his question.
Noticing her reaction, he quickly says, “Sorry, it’s none of my business.”
“No, it’s fine.” She looks up at him again. “I found out she was sleeping with someone else. I caught her texting this other person while we were in bed, cuddling. She thought I was asleep.” A bitter laugh escapes her at the idiocy of it all.
Harry’s eyes turn sympathetic. “Jesus. That’s awful.”
“Yeah... So, hey, you may have broken my heart, but at least you can say you never cheated on me!”
“I mean, that bar’s pretty low.”
“Oh, the bar is fucking underground at this point.”
He laughs. She grins. Then he stands up and walks around the island to her, pulling her into a tight hug, which she happily reciprocates. 
“I’m sorry people suck,” he says, resting his chin on her head. “I’m sorry I suck.”
She frowns. “You don’t suck.”
“Yes, I do. All I’ve done is break your heart. Over and over again.”
She pulls away to get a proper look at him, noting the guilt in his eyes. “That’s not true. You’ve been an amazing friend to me.”
He smiles sadly. “I don’t know about that.”
“Harry...” It concerns her that he’s being so hard on himself. He really has been a wonderful friend to her. Despite all the hardships they experienced during their relationship, he has been there for her more than anyone else in her life. To hear him fail to recognize that makes her sad.
“I want to be a better friend. I think I can do that. If you’ll give me a chance.”
“Of course.”
“I can even be your wingman if you need me to be.”
She laughs and makes a face. “My wingman?”
“Sure, why not?” He gives a casual shrug, as if the concept of her ex-boyfriend, whom she’s still undeniably attracted to, being her wingman isn’t weird as hell.
“Thanks for the kind offer, but I’m actually putting the brakes on dating for a while.”
“Oh, okay.”
She hugs him again, content to have him in her arms, content that she can finally go back to hanging out with her best friend again.
***
“I think we should watch the new season of The Crown tonight.”
Y/N’s eyes widen with excitement. “Oooh, yes! I’ve been dying to watch that.”
“We could order pizza as well. From that new place I told you about. You need to try it.”
“Absolutely.”
They’re sitting in their little corner of the cafe. Y/N finished work a while ago and headed there to meet up with Harry, who was coming from a writing session at the studio. Now, as they discuss their plans to wind down for the evening, something—or someone—catches Y/N’s attention from across the cafe. 
“Oh, fuck my life,” she mutters.
“What’s wrong?” asks Harry, as he follows her gaze over his shoulder.
“I just realized Elena’s here. With her new girlfriend. They’re sitting over by the window.”
“Oh.” He turns back to Y/N. “Do you want to leave? We can go somewhere else.”
She replies with an adamant shake of the head. “Nope. This is our favourite cafe too. Why should we have to go?”
Suddenly, Elena’s gaze shifts over to her and they make eye contact. Without reacting, Y/N returns her attention to Harry. But then, out of the corner of her eye, she sees Elena standing up and walking over to them.
“Oh, great, she’s coming over here,” she says with an agitated sigh.
Harry squeezes her hand on the table reassuringly. “It’s okay. You’ve got this.”
“Y/N,” says Elena, once she reaches their table.
“Elena,” says Y/N.
“Harry,” says Elena.
“Elena,” says Harry.
A long, awkward pause follows.
Unable to endure the awkwardness any further, Y/N breaks the silence, “How are you?”
“I’m all right. You?”
“I’m fine.”
Another pause. Elena turns to Harry. 
“So, the reason I came over here is because my girlfriend, who’s sat over there”—she points over to the table she just came from—“happens to be a massive fan of yours, Harry, and she was hoping she could get a picture with you. I told her that we’re friends and I would ask for her.”
It takes everything in Y/N to resist the urge to roll her eyes dramatically. The nerve of this woman to cheat on her, then come over here to ask Harry—whom she only knows through Y/N—to take a picture with the same person that she cheated with! Truly mindboggling. Not to mention, it puts Harry in a very awkward position.
He looks at Y/N unsurely, waiting for a cue from her before deciding how to respond. “Uh...”
She gives him a small nod.
“Sure,” he says to Elena.
He stands up and follows her to the table where Elena’s girlfriend is eyeing him with a frozen, starstruck look on her face. He chats with her for a minute, then poses for a selfie before walking back over to Y/N.
“That was quick,” she says.
He shrugs. “She was more interested in getting a photo than talking. I asked her not to post it until later though, once we’re gone.”
Now that the uncomfortable encounter is over, they return to their conversation from earlier, debating what else to get with their pizza tonight.
Some time later, long after Elena and her girlfriend have left the cafe, Y/N notices a group of young people lurking outside the entrance, trying to peer in through the glass door. It’s getting dark out, but she has seen, and worn, Harry’s merch enough times to recognize it on someone else even in the dark from a distance.
“Uh-oh,” she says.
“What?” Harry looks at her. With his back to the entrance, he has no idea what’s happening. 
“I think I see fans outside. Elena’s girlfriend must’ve posted the picture already.”
He throws up a hand and lets it fall on the table. “Oh, for fuck’s sake.”
Y/N takes out her phone to check, and surely enough, the picture is all over social media. The cafe logo can be seen on a sign in the background. “Yup, she posted it on Instagram and now it’s making rounds. This place is going to get crowded real fast if we don’t leave soon.”
“Would it be bad if we snuck out the back? I’m just not in the mood to deal with this.”
“Yeah, we can do that. I’m sure Theo would let us use the back exit.”
Theo is the owner of the cafe, whom Harry and Y/N have befriended over the years.
Harry scoots his chair back to stand up, then stops and looks at her with a conflicted expression. “I feel bad.”
She leans forward and locks eyes with him. “H, people can’t expect you to be on all the time, ready to interact and take pictures with them whenever they want. You’re a human being, not a tourist attraction.”
“I know, I know.” He bites his lip and sighs. “Okay, let’s go.”
They stand up, grab their jackets, and find Theo, who doesn’t even hesitate to help them sneak out the back exit into the empty alleyway behind the cafe. Once outside, they stop to put on their jackets. Y/N shivers as a cold breeze passes by.
“Holy crap. How did it get so cold?” she mutters through chattering teeth.
“You need a better jacket. This thing is paper thin.” Harry pinches the arm of her jacket to prove his point.
She rolls her eyes. “Okay, mom. It’s not that thin.”
“Here, put this on.” He hands her his thick, green jacket, but she pushes it away.
“No! Then you’ll get cold.”
“I’ll be fine.”
“Nope.”
He glares at her. “Y/N, put it on.”
“Make me.”
His eyebrows raise high on his forehead. “What did you say?”
A devilish grin materializes on her face. “I said... Make me.”
Grabbing her by the waist, he pushes her up against the wall of the cafe. She stares up at him, gasping when she notices the unmistakable lust in his eyes. He leans forward and presses his lips against hers so firmly, so hungrily that it literally takes her breath away. She kisses him back with the same hunger until, all of a sudden, he pulls away.
“Fuck, I’m sorry,” he blurts out.
She shakes her head. “No, don’t be sorry.”
He releases her waist and takes a step back, a look of dread now replacing the lust from before. “This is bad. This is so bad.”
“What? What are you talking about?”
“I can’t do this again. Us being together. It never ends well.” He runs a flustered hand through his curls. “I don’t want to hurt you again. I love you too much for that.”
She tilts her head to the side. “Why are you so convinced that you’ll hurt me again?”
“Because that’s what I do, Y/N. I think I’ve proven that. It’s just who I am.”
“No, it’s not.”
He turns away, but she steps forward and takes his face in her hands, making him look at her again.
“I know who you are. You’re kind and thoughtful and loving, and you have the biggest heart of anyone I know. You’re also flawed and imperfect and you make mistakes, but who doesn’t? At least you’re trying to be better, which is more than most people can say.”
His eyes never leave hers as she talks, which tells her that her words are actually sinking in.
“I know you’re scared of hurting me again, but I’m not scared. I trust you and I trust that it’ll be different this time.”
“How can you still trust me after everything I’ve put you through?”
“Because like I said, I know you.”
Like a light switch, Y/N catches the shift in his eyes from fear to hope.
“Now kiss me,” she says. “Properly this time.”
And then she’s back against the wall with his hands squeezing her waist and his mouth claiming hers. No hesitation this time. No internal conflicts. Just pure love and fervor and affection.
He gets even closer, until their fronts are touching, and rubs up against her. She moans, squirming between his body and the wall. Whereas she was cold before, the heat of their passion is enough to warm her up.
He starts speaking in between kisses. “We’re not”—kiss—“having sex”—kiss—“in an alleyway.”
She giggles against his lips. “Okay, then take me home.”
***
Back at Harry’s house, they’ve barely stepped in through the door before he’s pressing her up against it, attaching his lips to her jaw and neck while his hand wanders down the front of her body. His deft fingers unbutton her jeans before sliding inside them. He caresses her clit through her panties.
She tilts her head back, exposing more of her neck for him to kiss and suck on. Her hands weave through his hair. He continues rubbing languid circles into her clit until her panties dampen with her arousal, then stops.
“Nooo,” she whines.
“Shh, just taking you upstairs. C’mon.” He leads her up to his bedroom where he begins stripping off her clothes. He doesn’t remove his own clothes just yet, knowing she likes it this way. Something about being completely exposed and vulnerable while he’s fully clothed is a turn-on for her.
He tells her to lie on the bed while he goes to the closet to grab a couple of silk ties. When he returns, her hand is between her legs. He climbs on top of her and grabs her wrists, sliding them up by her head.
“Can’t leave you alone for two seconds without you touching yourself, hmm?”
She gives him an innocent smile.
“What am I going to do with you?” he says.
“Anything you want.”
His cock twitches in his pants. “Gonna be a good girl and keep your hands above your head?”
“Yes, sir,” she says, still smiling.
He kisses her briefly and gets up to bind her wrists to the bedposts using the silk ties. He has her tug on them a bit to ensure that they’re secure but not overly tight. Then he’s back on the bed, positioning himself between her spread legs, almost drooling at the sight of her dripping wet cunt.
She watches eagerly as he lowers his head between her legs and swipes his tongue over her slit, savouring her intoxicating taste and scent. It occurs to him while he’s sucking on her swollen nub that they haven’t does this in so long and she’s probably been in bed with several other people in that time. The thought makes his fingers dig deeper into her thighs. 
“You taste so fucking good,” he comments. “Annoys me to think of all the other people who’ve tasted you.”
“There haven’t been that many.”
“Well, even one is too many for me, so...”
She giggles and squirms as he dips his tongue into her hole. Whenever he draws back to take a breath, her hips automatically buck towards his mouth. He has to hold her down with one hand on her abdomen. 
It’s easy to tell when she’s nearing an orgasm from the way her thighs tense and her moans become more frequent, breathing more ragged. 
“I’m going to—” she begins.
“Don’t even think about cumming until I say so,” he warns.
“But I’m so close. Please—”
“Hold it.”
“I can’t!”
Ignoring her pleas, he continues licking at her clit as he pleases until she’s writhing on the bed, slowly coming apart. Her back arches as the orgasm ripples through her body. He waits until she’s done before pinning her with a disapproving look for cumming despite being told not to.
“What?!” she exclaims. “I told you I couldn’t hold it any longer. Not really my fault, is it?”
In a mere second, he’s hovering over her with a hand wrapped firmly around her neck. Her wide eyes stare up at him. He feels her throat bob up and down beneath his palm as she swallows. Her racing pulse can be felt under his fingers.
“What was that?” he asks.
“N—nothing,” she squeaks out.
“That’s what I thought, you greedy little slut.”
“I’m sorry.” Her voice is so small, barely above a whisper. He can see her sinking into subspace before his eyes. Tied up with his hand around her throat, completely and utterly at his mercy.
“That’s all right, darling,” he says. “I think you’ve forgotten who’s in charge, but we can fix that.”
He starts untying her wrists. She eyes him curiously but doesn’t dare to speak. He flips her over onto her stomach and reties her wrists. 
Leaning down to her ear, he asks, “Do you remember the safeword?” He expects her to have forgotten after all this time, but she proves him wrong.
“Peaches!”
“Good girl.” He plants a soft kiss to her lips, then straightens up again. 
He runs a hand through her hair and down her spine before resting on the delicious curve of her bum. He gives it one brief squeeze before lifting his hand in the air, watching her tense as his touch disappears. He allows the anticipation to build before bringing his hand back down in one swift motion. A resounding slap echoes through the room, followed by a grunt of pain from Y/N.
“Count, slut,” he orders.
“O—one.”
He spanks her again, harder this time, and relishes the way her ass bounces from the impact.
“Ah! Fuck. Two.”
The next few arrive in quick succession, causing her to squirm and fight against her restraints in a futile attempt to escape her punishment. He knows she’s enjoying it though because when the next slap lands on her pussy, his hand comes away covered in her juices.
“Look at you, getting off on your punishment. Only whores enjoy getting punished,” he teases.
Y/N presses her reddening face into the pillow and moans. He chuckles at her reaction and delivers a few more slaps directly to her cunt.
Finally, he stands up to undress himself. Then he lifts her hips off the mattress to shove a pillow under them, propping her up into the perfect position for a fucking. His dick is rock-hard at this point. He’s been palming himself through his pants here and there, but only her pussy can give him the relief he needs. He presses himself against her opening, then stops and starts rubbing his tip against her clit instead.
He keeps this up until she grumbles impatiently, “Can you fuck me already? Please and thank you?”
“I thought you’d never ask,” he says with a smirk, then plows his cock into her.
She inhales sharply. He groans. It takes them both a few moments to process the intensity of her walls stretching around him. He pulls out and pushes back in, his length gliding in and out effortlessly due to her wetness. She tries to grind her hips back into him, though his strong grip keeps her locked in place.
As he brings her to the brink of yet another orgasm, she says, “I need to— I mean, can I please cum?”
He slows the pace of his thrusts. “You came once already, remember? Now you want more?”
“Yesss.” She tries to look over her shoulder at him, and if he could see her big, beautiful eyes, he would probably give in way sooner. “Please, H, I’m sorry for earlier. I really am.”
“Hmmm, I don’t buy it.”
She whimpers in desperation, her hands curling in their restraints.
“I think I should cum inside you and leave you here, unsatisfied, alone, and dripping with my cum.”
Her jaw drops at his evil proposition. “No! God, please don’t do that to me. I’ll do anyth—”
“Shhh, I’m only teasing, sweetheart.” He rubs a soothing hand over her back.
She lets out a sigh of relief.
“You can cum now.”
The words are barely out of his mouth before her pussy is flexing fiercely around his cock, shrouding it in more of her creamy wetness. A few more sharp, sloppy thrusts and he’s cumming inside her too, moaning and repeating her name in his blissful haze.
After pulling out, the first thing he does is remove the pillow from below her hips and untie her wrists. Then he lies down next to her and pulls her into his arms, pressing his lips against her forehead.
“You did so good for me, baby,” he says. Then he draws back to take a good look at her. “Are you all right?”
She gives him a dazed grin. “Oh, I’m amazing.”
He chuckles. “Yes, you are.” Pulling her into his chest, he tells her, “I love you.”
“I love you.”
As they lay there together, he marvels at how lucky he is. Not only to have another chance to be with her, but to have her in his life at all. Y/N is right; things will be different this time. Because this time, he’ll spend less time worrying about getting his own heart broken and more time cherishing hers.
***
Thank you for reading!  MASTERLIST
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sitarawrites · 2 months
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OK I AGREE W YOU. THOSE CHEATING FICS GET ON NERVES AND ALWAYS MAKE ME WANNA KMS..LIKE GOJO BE CHEATING ON READER AND THEN BOOM SOME UNPLANNED PREGNANCY/HIDDEN KID..THEN AFTER YEARS MF COMES BACK AND STILL MAKES HER JEALOUS AND BLAH BLAH THEN HE GIVES SOME SHITTY ASS SOB STORY (FUCK THATS WORSE THAN THE CHEATING ITSELF) THEN YN STARTS SEEING HIM IN A NEW LIGHT AND ALSO THATS FUCKING WHEN YN'S CURRENT BF MESSES UP(girl tbh he'd have done nothing worse than gojo but yeah miss mam goes to him ofc) ..YN CRYBABY GOES TO GOJO FOR COMFORT(they are using the character's vulnerability here and I don't fucking like it)..BOOM THEU BACK TOGETEHR...MF SOMETIMES DOENST EVEN GROVEL UGHHHH 🙄🙄 I have had enough of these fics 😭
( got a bit overboard with this but these are my genuine opinions after reading almost 15 such type of books on wattapad and tumblr )
I feel you girl tbh the Gojo cheating or unrequited love arranged marriage fics are so frustrating to read , almost everyone having the same plot. I'm so glad I found people who agree with me because when I check the comment of such fics all I see is everyone praising the story that makes me question " Am I the only one who didn't like it ?"
Listen I don't have anything against the plot but my personal beef is against how they characterize y/n , like people say everyone can't write your ideal y/n but why are all y/n same in such fics. They're too good to be true , like Gojo ( or any male lead ) would cheat on them , insult them hurt them and girl would be like " I couldn't bring myself to hate him" ARE YOU KIDDING ME AUTHOR SAN ?
The y/n is always so passive , docile , domestic and foolish like bitch is jobless like always jobless and never having financial independency and they always date the second male lead ( who treats her so right , is a green forest but yn will go back to her cheating ex ) because their broke ass doesn't have money to survive on their own. yn is either a woman of a rich family with like 0 interest in making a career of her own or have goals instead her main goal is to get Gojo's love in those unrequited love fics. Gojo will treat her like absolute shit , sleep with other woman , verbally abuse her but girl will tolerate it . Then when they show Gojo having a redemption he is not even doing the bare minimum.
The guy still can't choose between his mistress and legal wife and then we're supposed to feel sorry for him because this is his redemption arc. The bitch is still not completely loyal to yn even though he is trying to win her back . yn rejects his advances then he'll go back to the mistress and sleep with her , make yn jealous and boom yn forgives him . most of us read such stories for the redemption arc of the male lead but he is doing not even the bare minimum , like he 'll say sorry once and angel yn forgives him in just one try , like girl have some self respect .
Or he'll make her jealous and then she'll forgive him or accidental baby ofc and once again she forgives him so easily . I was expecting her to refuse to forgive him for months , make him miserable and realize his mistake and then slowly heal in case she wants to forgive him and take him back but no, she forgives him when he tries just once or twice ( at this point it feels the author isn't even putting effort in writing the story , I know so many writers who suffer from a writer's block but they take their time and do the story justice so it's a pathetic excuse when people say , yn can't be perfect).
One thing that's even more pathetic is that yn is never the heir to her family business or someone who is a powerful smart woman. She's always a pitiful girl with 0 self respect who always allows others to walk over her , with 0 personality. But then the author tries to make her a bad bitch only to ruin it when male lead's pathetic half ass attempt to win her back. and always yn chooses fashion designing to become financially independent ( which is never talked about again after 2-3 chapters and it's always with the help of the second ml ) . Like there are others ways too yk , like she can continue her family business of electronics , pharma or something like that . I mean her parents must have taught her something like that because we're not in the 1700's where women can't inherit their family business,
The only fic that I read so far that have done justice to this plot is a Levi fic on Wattapad which I can't find now with the title " Never again " and y/n there was really good
( I might get hate for this but this is my opinion. What do u people think ? )
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victimsofyaoipoll · 9 months
Text
Round 1
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Propaganda Under Cut
Alana Bloom
she kissed will graham in s1 and dated hannibal in s2 so you can imagine how bad the fandom is to her. fun fact she's in a canon lesbian relationship now tho <3
The show literally does the yaoi treatment of victimisation for the benefit of the male leads to her. And then the fandom mistreats her
I'm not sure if this even counts but...Literally a victim of Yaoi along with several other characters in-series, but she got it almost the worst. The entire show is just people dying because the two male leads are OBSESSED with each other and can't be normal about anything. Alana Bloom, actual PhD of psychology and consultant to the FBI, got kissed by one guy, fucked and fed people-meant by the other, and pushed out a window by the murder husbands' forced-surrogate daughter. Like. Actual victim of several crimes caused by yaoi. She's probably one of the few examples of a Yaoi Victim overcoming and evolving past her yaoi-related trauma into a stronger person/character, though: She gets an entire character overhaul and a hot, millionairess for a wife. She kills a man with an eel. She becomes head of the BSHCI, effectively putting her in complete power over her jackass cannibal ex-bf. She does quite well. Unfortunately, the rest of her screen time is spent trying not to get killed in the ongoing fallout of Hannibal and Will's fucked up courtship, but hey. Can't have everything. I don't even know if I'm saying anything valid here: the fandom loves her, but I supposed her position outside of the Hannigram relationship relegates her to a non-subject in a lot of Hannigram-focused fanwork. She's an 'obstacle' to their relationship only in the sense that Will had a crush on her once that went nowhere and Hannibal started an actual relationship with her SPECIFICALLY to piss off Will. I guess she's also a more literal obstacle as Hannibal's jailer and Will's friend who's constantly pointing out to him that Morals exist and he should try having some of those, maybe.
Gwen
She stands in the way of Merthur, by far the most popular ship in the fandom. I haven’t seen it as much in recent years, but back in the days of fanfiction.net she got slut shamed so badly for having been romantically interested in three of the male characters over the course of the show, which is just... normal straight woman behavior, meanwhile Merlin crushed on pretty much every woman who even looked at him in the early seasons of the show and got no hate for that whatsoever. I barely even read Merthur fics (not because it’s m/m, just because certain aspects of their relationship don’t appeal to me) but the “Gwen is a slut” attitude was so pervasive across the fandom, even fics that weren’t explicitly anti-Gwen would “jokingly” call her a slut. I even saw a few fics demonizing her for having an affair with Lancelot despite the fact that SHE WAS ENCHANTED when that happened, and surprise surprise, Lancelot (who was also under the influence of magic) got none of that hate, and neither did Arthur, who got enchanted to fall in love with multiple women over the course of the show.
Canonically Arthur Pendragon's love interest and an important and interesting character in the show who's completely shoved aside and ignored in favour of the medieval bbc yaoi ship. At best they put her and Morgana in Lesbian Timeout (ie make them get together and then reduce them to wingwomen at best because god forbid we focus on the medieval bbc yuri). Justice for Gwen right now!
She is prince Arthur's love interest (eventually wife). Arthur is MADLY in love with her. He tells his tyrannical father he would give up his crown to be with her (she's a servant in the series). He forgives her cheating on him with Lancelot (!), which in the show is caused by an evil enchantment, but the characters never find out about it. He chooses her time and time again. His love for Gwen is literally never put into question. Many fans insist to this day that there was no chemistry between Gwen and Arthur compared to Arthur and Merlin. Arthur isn’t even particularly nice to Merlin most of the time! The funny thing is that Merlin himself ships these two so hard and does everything he can to help them get together!! Gwen & Arthur are adorable and too many fans were drunk on the yaoi fumes to see it. ARTHUR WAS A SIMP FOR GWEN.
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callsigns-haze · 5 months
Text
Paper Rings… maybe someday….
A/n: This is the third post to my new blog so please be nice! I'm going to try to make this into a series so please show this story a bit of love and reblog!
Pairing: Jake 'Hangman' Seresin x Y/n 'Haze' Mitchell
Word count: 2.4k
Summary: Y/N and Jake don't hate each other as much anymore…surely a bit of the past was brought back…
Based of the song: Lavender Haze by Taylor Swift
Warnings: Sexual themed teasing, cursing, fluff, just very detailed visuals on Jake
Part 1 / Part 2
THIS IS NOT PROOF READ SO A LOT OF SPELLING MISTAKES!
I used @rosiahills22 scenario for this fic and the love and support i get from her is amazing! Babe thank you soo much and ily!
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The bar is hundreds of conversations told in loud voices, all of them competing with the music that's in the atmosphere.
The crowd is young, students from the university for the most part. Jake winds his way through the warm bodies to order a drink - the dark local beer.
Cheap, like him.
Once you have told him.
You've been flying with the daggers for 3 weeks now. You still don't truly trust him but you both don't truly hate each other. He just wants to know why. Why you disappeared with a notice. Why you didn't say anything before you left.
Your old crew. Conor. Oh how badly Jake despised him. The ex that at every chance he got he hurt you. Like he didn't care about you at all. He didn't care about you, cheated on you at every chance he got with those local whores and feelingless bitches.
Conor never cared about you. At least not in the ways Jake would. Jake has always been for you since the start. He wanted to call you his.
He even informed you that his heart beat for her and it still does. From the squad it was only him there. Silence from the pool table, something that never happens.
Hangman took a day off today, he never does that. First time in forever, he took a break.
For the last three weeks with you around there is nothing else on his mind besides you. For many years he's been mad, depressed even anxious since you left.
He wasn't the same Jake after you left. Not the funny, caring, charming and protective. Not to anyone but since you came back he's changed again.
Everyone could tell it as well. Even Bob said that this is the first time he hasn't called him Baby on board at least twice per week.
Hangman is being nice.
He thanks Penny for his beer with that smirky kind of wink not having to pay for his drink since some not aware traveler put their phone on the bar and made his way to the pool table.
If you wouldn't know him this sight would be sad.
A man alone in the middle of the day playing pool by himself but truly Jake found it relaxing.
He picks up a cue from a bench and leans it against the table, looking around, the students have mostly left now leaving the bar to quiet down something that the Hard deck barely experiences. He pulls out the ball holder, leaning down to the whole on one end on the table as two delicate hands tap him one on each shoulder.
"Boo!" You say into his ear causing him to jump due to shock of finding you behind him.
"Jesus! Haze! Your lucky I noticed it was you or I would've poked your eyes out," he says still recovering from the shock, holding up his right hand with his ring and middle fingers forming a 'v' as he recreates a motion of poking at you.
"Works every time," you say still laughing while leaning against the table as he gets up.
He love your laugh. When you laugh he see your child self. That's all he needs for all his life. Your laughter was the sugar in his days. He knows, you laugh when you feel safe. So that you laugh so very much in his company is a great compliment and something he wants more of.
"Okay Haze, enough of that I wasn't so funny," he says twirling you around to face him. His hands on your hips, ignite something in you.
It's a feeling you haven't felt in a fairly long time.
You know you look very lonely playing pool alone. It's quite sad actually," you say as that snaps the two of you out of your thoughts.
"Well then, I'm not alone anymore," letting go of you he takes a step to the left reaching for the spare cue handing it over to you
"Nope. No way Jake. I'm NOT playing pool with you," you tell him as he makes his way to the other side of the table.
"Come on Haze, remember how much fun we used to have, maybe chill the 'I don't care about anymore' act and play some pool with me," he tells you, handing over the spare cue.
"Jakob please no," you beg leaning against the wall behind you, groaning that you have to participate.
"It's just a little bet. $100, nothin' big," he says smirking and not surprisingly having one of those stupid toothpicks in his mouth. "Nothing big my ass," you shake your head regretting coming to the hard deck this early.
"Okay so how about we do this our old style, teasing," he says and again the eye contact. Those beautiful green eyes shine upon you again.
"Like teasing in-"
"Yes Haze like teasing in bed."
"You're mentally mad Hangman."
"So are you."
"Fair enough," the gaze never breaks. You take a few steps forward so you and Jake align. The sent of that light scented perfume fills his nostrils. It's so, home, for him. So you.
"Game on, Haze," he tells you lining up the white ball and his cue about to break the balls apart until he feels your hand caressing down his abs causing him quickly to turn around.
"Haze." He murmurs into your ear looking over your shoulder to see if anyone was watching.
"You told me to tease you, just like the old days."
This will be a long and hard game…
This was a very long game to be exact. For Jake it probably was the most fun he could have but then the teasing, oh the teasing he suggested himself was driving him over the edge.
He was about to strike another ball in but that little whispers of yours as you run your hand along his thigh, "Remember those little purple panties you used to love ripping off me with your teeth. Mhmm those. Well you know seeing you lean over this table flexing all those muscles makes me want you to rip them off right now," and miss. He missed. Your dirty talk all night was getting to him.
It's a new experience. Usually this would never happen. He always kept his head in the game. Or between your legs…. But because of his own game you were winning.
Oh and have I mentioned…the daggers have arrived and have no clue what the real aim of the game is.
You see Jake is really good a teasing has been this whole game. They way he quickly grabbed your ass while everyone was busy and not observant, causing you to hit the ball to hard that you miss your ball and the white goes in the hole.
Or when his hands wrapped around you before anyone arrived and how he tugged at the hem of you skirt and his teeth pulled on your ear as he lightly moaned into it causing you to feel like a puddle and hit the ball to hard.
But the time when his hands secretly went up your top while he was making sure no one was looking and lightly tugged at the purple material covering your tities from his touch.
And every time you let him.
Every goddamn time.
You let him tease you till the end and you tease him back.
"You know what I love about this Haze, every time you lean in front of me I can see those soaked little purple panties and the way you bend so well over this table I know I could bend you like a pretzel," he whispered into your ear, moving that lose strand of hair to behind your ear.
This time you didn't miss. You have one more ball and he has two, then the 8-ball.
"Good luck, bagman. I have this in the bag," you say, doing a little jump of victory as your ball goes in.
"Mhmmmm, keep dreaming Y/n. You can never beat the master," he says but then shock.
You hand is now on his crotch on that jean covered tiny bulge that has been forming.
But god. Your hand. On his crotch. You were touching him.
Not a big shock to be honest, he's been touching you all night. But the feeling. The feeling he got the second you touched him was…wow.
After all these years, the touch from your delicate palms still to this days ignites something in him.
The gulp he takes, you can clearly see his adam's apple shake. The grip on his cue tightens, causing those strong, powerful looking veins to form.
His eyes darken. Even though you lit a flame in him.
And his heart races. Many times he told you it beats for you and it truly does.
He still loves you.
"What Jakob, can't concentrate anymore. Might just easily give up and let me win," you say into his ear and quickly pull away from here as Coyote makes his way over to the two of you.
"Wow Jake, you gonna let the witch win," Javy says and then lays his gaze to you, " What you gonna tell me that you'll hang me by my testicles?" He says so confidentially and smirks, lifting his beer to his lips.
"No, just wondering if the Egyptian way of mummification works. You know, the one where they stick a very long stick up you nose and twirl it around to pull your brain out in little strands. But I'd like to find out can you use to strands to strangle someone even after you already killed them."
With a 'pfffttttt' Coyote spits out his drink like a fig cloud in front of him, spraying the beer from his lips everywhere.
"Really Haze. While I'm eating," Fanboy shakes his head, stuffing his head with Cheesy fries, utterly disgusted of what he just heard.
"Sorry Mickey," you say, tone completely changing from the cruelty in your voice that you spoke to Javy.
And look at that, Haze. A score," he actually fucking tricked you. He used the opportunity of you being distracted so you couldn't distract him and took the shot. And he didn't miss or the white didn't go in meaning he has another shot.
"Well then Hangman show me what you got."
No more teasing came with that. Truly it was impossible, all the daggers have now made their way to the pool table so any whispers or moves would be quickly spotted by more than one.
This also meant a fair ending. Which meant it was about to get real. Without teasing and distractions, this was a fair game.
1 ball belonging to each and then the black 8-ball.
Jake hits his ball but not in the whole, instead it spirals all its way across the table slowing down and stopping at one edge.
"Your turn."
It was a easy hit. Everything was so perfectly lined up for you. Maybe if there was a Jake, touching, kissing, whispering you would have missed but there wasn't.
And your ball went in.
"YES!"
"Now now, don't get so excited, Mitchell. The 8-ball still exists."
Did I mention even chances? Oh yeah, about that… Jake easily hit in his last ball.
He did it with ease. Well truly you wouldn't know. Your eyes focused on his flexing arms and how those veins you puddle over returned.
"Well look at this now Haze. We're in this even. It could be me or you. Probably me though."
Fuck. He was right. It will be probably him. The chances of you hitting it in from this aliment are impossible and if you hit the wrong way Jake's next hit causes him to win.
You couldn't be teasing each other but Jake… Well Jake was Jake.
"Come on Haze. Your not gonna make it. It's impossible. Boom, it's over for you. You gonna try even though I'm gonna win? Wow. Damn you have no chance."
You see Jake was just being annoying.
And it worked, you missed.
You fucking missed.
And with one light touch, he will send the ball in, winning.
And he does.
Jake fucking Hangman Seresin, just bet you $100.
"Oh would you look at tha'. I won Haze. Hand it over," Jake smirks, making grabby hands to indicate he wants the cash.
You reach into a pocket at the back of your denim skirt, reaching for your phone, grabbing two fifties from your case and slipping the phone back to its place.
"You know what Jake," you say handing the cash over, holding onto his wrist and his eyes fall upon you, "They should have called you hangover."
"Why so, angel?" He asks generally confused.
"Because you're giving me a damn headache," you say smirking and turn around, walking away.
Jake smirks watching you walk away for some reason proud and tall. They way he loves to see you.
He is so interested in you he only notices Coyote as his friend nudges.
"You know what Javy, I'm gonna marry that girl someday."
"Hey Bagman!" You call from the Hard deck door.
"You gotta keep your head in the game," you say smirking, holding up his watch in your hand.
He quickly grabs his wrist to notice it's missing but when he looks back up you're gone.
"Good luck with doing that mate," Javy says clapping Jake on the back, "She's impossible to keep or get."
A/n: And this is the third post for Haze and Hangman! Please reblog this post and give them love! Please tell me if you want to be added to the taglist and follow this blog since we're only getting started!
Tagging some friends:
@callsign-magnolia
@shanimallina87
@callsign-dexter
@rosiahills22
@horseslovers2016
@djs8891
@hookslove1592
@emma8895eb
@hardballoonlove
@kmc1989
@dempy
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kybelles · 7 months
Text
it’s incredibly disappointing and shocking to see how misogynistic and vile the capri fandom is towards jokaste even in the year of 2023, to the point of calling her “used goods” and “an opportunistic slut” (YES YOU READ IT RIGHT!) it gets extra depressing when you remember jokaste did what she did to save damen’s life and it wasn’t even acknowledged by damen or that she was really rewarded other than laurent letting her go instead of her being charged with treason.
the most common argument i come across is “we don’t know if she did it to save damen’s life! it was purely laurent’s theory therefore it’s ambiguous.” now i know media literacy has been a lost art for the longest time so it doesn’t necessarily surprise me but if you read this exchange, based on her reaction, it’s quite clear that laurent was correct in his assumption:
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and if even this isn’t a solid proof for you, here’s pacat’s own words:
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another arguments i frequently see are:
a- “why didn’t she try to warn damen?” damen’s literal best friend from his childhood days tried to warn him against kastor and he paid him no mind. you really believe he would listen to jokaste, someone he’d known for a shorter period than nikandros?
b- “did she really need to sleep with kastor?” …yes? do i need to remind you that damen’s entire household was killed? which would include jokaste if she wasn’t kastor’s mistress? not to mention she had to be close to kastor to save damen.
through the series, pacat intentionally draws parallels between laurent and jokaste; both appearance and character wise. remember this scene where laurent stopped the vaskian raiders from instantly killing damen?
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jokaste played the same gamble. she had no way of knowing whether damen would survive in vere or not but she had to try because she loved damen too much to see him slaughtered like a pig in front of her eyes. and yes i use the word love because just look at the way she talks about him… oh my god… like while it is implied jokaste first got close to damen for personal gain, she obviously developed feelings for him after some point and had the utter respect for him. (i always think it’s quite sad us fic writers need to write her cheating on damen with kastor in modern aus for plot sake because under normal circumstances, jokaste would never let damen go)
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i guess the horrible misogyny aside, what also drives me insane is the double standard. laurent had damen collared like a slave, drugged him, forced him to fight with the threat of rape if he lost, whipped him, sexually assaulted him by proxy and the fandom can still sympathize with him and love him (don’t get me wrong i love him too) but when it comes to jokaste, someone who had no choice and did the only thing she could do to save damen, people hate her passionately and call her awful names. it’s infuriating. it’s disgusting.
tldr; jokaste genuinely loved damen and made the only choice she could under those unfortunate circumstances to save him from a horrible death and while no one is obligated to love her, this appalling misogyny train needs to stop.
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172 notes · View notes
retroellie · 1 year
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Cheater
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Summary: When finally toe to toe with Daryl after him cheating, you are given answers you rightfully deserve
A/N: First wanted to say this fic was inspired by @starrydixon 's fic, i legit got so angsty that i wanted to write my own and my own little interpretation of it, so definitely go read theirs <3. But enjoy this complete mess i made in literally 2 hours lmao.
Warnings: Cheating and angst
Word count: 2.1K
You stood in front of him like a deer in headlights, you were terrified to even speak. The Daryl Dixon, the asshole, the cheater, the love of your life was standing in front of you, something you promised never to let happen again. This is the first time you had been in the same room after the incident, after he had told you the thing that ruined your entire life.
Part of you wished he would’ve just kept it to himself, letting you live out your perfect love life with him but part of you was so glad he told you. You would much rather be depressed the rest of your life than be looked at as a fucking clown by everyone but not know why. You hated them though, you wanted to slit his throat right here and right now, Daryl felt so bad that he’d actually let you too.
Either of you were too scared to speak, too afraid to bring up the very thing that broke your relationship in the first place. You were afraid simply because it had been going okay so far, nothing like how either you anticipated your first time seeing each other in 2 years would go. Daryl came to help with the water treatment and you were there, all sweaty and worn out. You froze when you first saw him, looking over at michonne who was looking at you looking at him.
She never even told you he had come to visit Alexandria, no warning but simply because she thought he wouldn’t stay long enough for you to see him. He just came for some supplies but ended up sticking around to help out with Alexandria, it was still his home after all. After the water treatment was finally up and going again, you did the unthinkable… you invited Daryl into your once shared home for a glass of water.
“Just to make sure the water treatment is fixed.” You tried to be cheery abit it but something about his eyes made you angry.
Why did you invite him in? You have no idea, maybe because you missed his presence or you wanted to ask the questions that were constantly running through your head or maybe you just wanted to kill him then and there. Daryl was hesitant but he would not pass up the chance to spend time with you, before or after even if he felt terrible for what he did to you.
So here you were, standing in front of him, watching him look at anything but your eyes. Good, he didn’t deserve to look into your eyes after what he did. The house was silent as you drank your waters, neither one of you wanted to bring it up but you decided to rip off the bandaid before it got worse.
“How long did it last?” You asked, the only thing coming out of your mouth in the past 10 minutes.
Daryl could’ve played stupid but he knew what you meant, he knew the answer would leave you more devastated too. Daryl racked his brain to give an exact estimate of how long and each answer created a deep puncture in his chest.
“6 months.” He said plainly, his eyes dropping down to his now empty glass.
Your entire body had gone frozen, your heart crack open more and more as the answer lingered through the air. You knew It was long but 6 months was too long. Your first 6 months with Daryl he had told you he loved you, he fucked you like there was no tomorrow and his told you it would only be you and him for the rest of your lives. What did she get in those 6 months? Did she get the same treatment? What could’ve possibly happened in those 6 months?
“6 months?!?” You damn near yelled, making it known how upset you were.
Daryl just kept his eyes down, he felt so ashamed of himself and he knew you were too. He didn’t speak, just let you have your moment because after all he’s done… you deserve that. Now the question we’re piling up in your head, you didn’t just want answers now you needed them. You closed your eyes, took a deep breath and asked another question.
“What was her name?” You asked, not even knowing if you wanted the answer.
“Leah,” he said without letting the question linger for too long.
“Did you live together?”
“Yes.”
“Did you fuck her?”
“Yes.”
You questioned him rapidly, not even taking a break before going on to the next. You felt you deserved these answers after the long 2 years of them burning in your brain. You asked about her, you asked about him and you asked about what they were. With every answer, even if they were yes and no’s, your heart would break more and more. You needed that though, you needed Daryl to break your heart so you felt sick even looking at him, just so you could move on and heal.
“Why?” Was the only thing you said, no context to what you meant but somehow Daryl knew.
He thought about it, he had no idea why… it just happened. That question had him frozen, struck on the biggest question you’ve asked so far. He racked his brain, trying to find the words for how he really felt and why the hell he did something so stupid. He was stupid was plain and simply put an answer but you deserved an explanation. He finally got the courage to look at you standing there, eyes streaked with tears as you grabbed onto your own hoodie violently. Daryl still thought you were the most beautiful thing but right now he felt he didn’t even deserve to see you.
“I’m stupid y/n, I really am but when Rick disappeared I was sad. I don’t know why but I still had hope he was still out there and I knew I was going out all the time to hurt you, I could feel you getting more distant.” He paused, racking his brain to find more words. “You got so distant that I thought you wanted me out of your life so I did, I stopped coming around because I couldn’t bear to see ya. Then Leah showed up. I knew that when me and you first met, the thing we had with each other, the love we made and the memories, it filled a hole in me… you filled a hole in me Y/N. I was expecting the same thing to happen with Leah, I thought the hole you used to fill could be filled with another person… but it can’t.”
You sobbed even more, tears rushing down your face and you couldn’t even stop them anymore. Daryl’s words were something you needed but when you got it, you couldn’t handle it. His words were too much, they didn’t make you feel any better but only worse. He tried to replace you, he needed to replace you when you needed him the most. You craved him back then, you just wanted your stupid boyfriend to hold you for a while because Rick's death didn’t only hurt Daryl.
Rick was your brother, not by blood but by souls he was. He cared for you, he made sure you were safe and he even saved you in so many ways, even from yourself. So when he died, you couldn’t… you were depressed and Daryl leaving all the time did not help, Daryl was looking for ghosts when you needed him the most.
“I needed you Daryl…I needed you and you weren’t there.” You said simply, shoving your face in your hands as you continued to sob.
Your sobs broke Daryl, he could feel his tears starting to spill over his eyes. He never meant to hurt you, as a matter of fact he promised he would never hurt you and as if you needed more of a reason not to trust anyone again… he broke that promise. He deserved to rot with the walkers for what he did to you and hell he even tried at one point, but he wouldn’t hurt you again… you couldn’t handle another death.
“I’m going to ask one more question Daryl….” You said, taking in a breath before asking. “Did you love her?”
He wanted to laugh at that thought, him loving Leah?? Impossible. He fucked her, he cuddled her, he even let her say he was hers but he knew deep down… He was yours, always and forever. Even if you don’t forgive him now, he will always be yours no matter what. You found him at his worst, you gave him a chance and he fell in love with you. He had never felt that way about someone before, let alone someone like you. A pretty, smart and strong person like you… he never even would’ve thought you would give him the chance you did.
“No… I couldn’t.” He stated, voice cracking as his tears continued to flow down his cheeks.
“You couldn’t?” You asked, confused about what the fuck he meant. Daryl was never good with words and you knew it too.
“I just couldn’t, deep down I knew it was always you I wanted and loved. Y/N what I did wasn’t because I stopped loving you, I did it because I loved you and the feeling you gave me was too good… too pure and when I thought I lost it, I had to get it again but I couldn’t.” He started, explaining himself with words but not even knowing if he was saying anything right.
You stayed silent, the words engraving themselves into your brain. You just sat there, looking down at your shaking hands. You never knew a man could do this to you, leave your sobbing and shaking as he explained why he couldn’t love anyone else but you. You couldn’t forgive Daryl, you couldn’t… you had a soft spot for him but it wasn’t that soft, you wouldn’t just let him break you down again like that.
“I’ll leave you alone…” Daryl set his glass down, picking up his things before turning for the door.
“Daryl!” You yelled before he could even step another foot away from you. Daryl stopped in his tracks, turning once again to face you.
“If you step outside that door… I swear on everything  you will never see me again, and I promise you that I will not let you step foot back into Alexandria… you know I have that power to do so.” You threatened, you were angry… he was leaving you again.
“You want me to stay?” He asked, adjusting the crossbow on his shoulder uncomfortably.
“No… no, yes… I mean FUCK! Daryl I want you to stop leaving me, stop running away from us Daryl!” You yelled, not even sure what you meant. “I fucking hate you Daryl… I fucking hate you so very fiber in my body but not because you ruined what we had.. but because after everything you put me through, I’m still so madly and pathetically in love with you.”
You were quite literally pouring your heart out for Daryl and he took it all in, he just hates that he was the one who caused you to do this. You weren’t sure what you wanted but right now you knew you didn’t want Daryl to leave you alone again, you have been alone for too long and you needed him here again but if he left once again you couldn’t bear it.
“So please Daryl… please just stay with me, don’t leave me again.”
Daryl couldn’t bear to see you like this, your eyes wet with tears and lips red from your biting them… what’s worse is that he caused this. He didn’t know what to do in the situation but what he did he for sure thought was the right thing to do. He dropped all this stuff, engulfing you in a hug as you sobbed. You didn’t know if you should hug back or not but you were too broken down, too afraid and too fucking sad to push him away. You wrapped your arms around him, squeezing him close to you like it was your last time seeing him.
His hands made their way up to your hair, lightly scratching your scalp because he knew you liked that. You just buried your tear streaked face into his shirt, causing his shirt to become damp.
“I’m here bunny… I’m not leaving again…” he said, cringey at the pet name but you needed it right now, you needed to know he was there with you.
You were not sure if this was going to spark something once again between you two, you had no idea but having Daryl here with you and speaking to you like he once did, it caused your thoughts to stop for a minute… letting you just feel the way you used to for a minute. If all you got was 2 more minutes of that feeling, you were okay with it.
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izukuisbaby · 2 years
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hewwo hi ! m saur proud of u 4 hitting 2k followers my luvr <3 it's such a huge milestone rlly !! n ur celebration is also saur pretty :3
anywho 4 da celebration can i get "y/n finding katsuki's phone unlocked and outta curiosity scrolling thru it just to a find a playist w their name !"
again oml m saur prouda u angel <3
⊹˚.⋆ GOING THROUGH KATSUKI'S PHONE - MY HERO ACADEMIA
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℘. flora's notes : i love u w my whole heart bro, i hope u like this 💓, also i uh made that playlist for your fictional bf and that's what took the longest in this fic u better enjoy it mf AND I kinda switched up the request I hope it's okay
℘. yes katsuki : listens to taylor swift, one direction and disney songs in secret
℘. infos : this is apart of my 2k event ! feel free to join :) fem reader.
℘. genre : pure fluff, the title is kinda misleading katsuki is not cheating and would never but he has his simp side hidden in his phone
m.list | comment and reblog if u enjoyed !
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you were waiting for your boyfriend to come back from sparring. katsuki gave you a spare key of his dorm for you to use whenever you needed. you were one of the privileged ones who he let into his personal space. you knew he was a private person and so you could not help but feel proud that he trusted you this way.
the door burst open and your delicate boyfriend entered. he heavily sighed and put his bag down on the floor. you sat up on his bed expectantly, waiting for him to give you attention. he turned around and saw you on his bed, which caused a gasp to escape his mouth... he was just not expecting you there.
"you scared the shit out of me dumbass, next time send a text instead of being on tik tok or whatever you do on that shitty phone", he walked over to you, kissed your forehead and stroke the back of your head with his hand. "I'll go take a shower, make yourself comfortable." he started walking towards his bathroom and right before getting in, he added : "not like you didn't already, you're a little invader I got some of your shit everywhere".
he would never admit it because, well, katsuki hates his feelings but he loves finding little pieces of you in his dorm room. scrunchies that smell like your shampoo, socks, skincare products or even left-over makeup. he cherished those items, each one of them reminded him of a memory he shared with you. the thought of you never failed to make him smile.
you heard the soft buzz of his phone in his bag and decided to take a look. you trust katsuki, he never made anything to make you doubt him and you knew he never would, he dates to marry. you were not expecting any other woman in his dms but Mina, and she has a girlfriend. but curiosity got the best of you and you wanted to see what was hidden in his phone. you first looked at the text he received, it was from Kirishima. "Denki is trying to make an impression of you looking at y/n bro and even Shoto is laughing 💀". Denki often made fun of Bakugo for being a "simp" and looking at you with "puppy eyes" which your boyfriend never ceases to deny. he did impressions of him so often that you could almost picture his act through the phone.
then you went to "notes", they were all locked but you were not surprised, your boyfriend is kind of paranoid sometimes... you tried to put your birthdate in the first one and it unlocked. "things i wish i could tell y/n", was written at the top. katsuki had troubles opening up and communicating with you because he feels weak for having feelings, you hesitated on reading its content. all things considered, you thought it would help you understand him better.
" - i love her, like the kind of love you see in movies. the one i thought didn't exist. like it's fucking stupid to write that shit in my notes but i need to get it out somehow.
- i think ill marry her if one day i get the balls to propose.
- i admire her patience, i can't help but think that going out with me is exhausting. i have a hard time controlling my emotions and i feel like she carries my brain at this point.
- i wish i could spend more time with her, but she probably needs personal space. i left her a key of my dorm, that's stupid too, but i like the idea of her spending time in my room because then it feels more of a home to me.
- i want her to feel like she's the most perfect girl I've ever met, because she is. but I care too much about people's opinion to do that. i am trying as hard as i can to be a good boyfriend but i never feel like it's enough. i don't show her off enough, i don't hold her enough, i don't talk about her enough because I'm scared shitless of falling in love and having it ruin the shell i took so long to build. and denki making fun of me for being a simp doesn't fucking help.
istg if anyone reads this I'll off myself"
you felt a bit guilty, it was more personal than you expected, and you swore not to EVER tell him about this, but it put your mind to rest. katsuki is not an easy boyfriend. he's not easy to comprehend but you love every part of him. you are willing to wait for however long it will take for him to tell you this face to face.
you heard the shower stop, you knew he would exit the bathroom any minute now, but there was one last app you wished to check, his Spotify. he had 2 playlists, his liked songs - 3 452 songs of various genres - put together in one same playlist. you sighed at how disorganized your boyfriend could be at times. and then, there was one with your name "y/n💌"
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your mouth was wide open and you felt like screaming. you won at life bro, your boyfriend had a playlist dedicated to YOU. your face still had the same expression when katsuki came out of the bathroom.
- "what's with the face dumbass ? you saw a ghost or something ? "
- "you have a playlist for me" you gave him a toothy smile, which he returned.
- "yeah it's whatever, when i like, take a shower or something. DON'T TELL ANYONE" he shouted as he sat beside you. "you didn't look at anything else, right ?", your heart clenched in your chest, you didn't want to embarrass him by admitting you read his note for you.
- "Denki just sent you a text" you smiled innocently. you took his hand into yours "Katsuki, I love you and you're enough okay. Don't ever doubt yourself, I chose you for a reason" you softly told him while stroking his cheek with your free hand.
- "I KNEW YOU READ IT YOU NOISY ASS. but I'm glad you did it was kind of... heavy on me." he sighed, paused for a moment, relaxing into your touch. "i really love you y/n, I don't say it enough but I really do. love scares the shit out of me. you have the power to destroy my heart and you know how much of a control freak i can be. I trust you with my weaknesses, don't use then against me... please"
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© izukuisbaby. comments appreciated ! although do not modify, translate, copy, claim as your own or repost on any app/platform/social media (this applies to all of my content)💓
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sanaxo-o · 3 months
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Be the one (Eric Sohn)
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To @deobienthusiast K, from Sana: Hihi K :) I know that we don’t talk much (which is a shame because I think your company would be a great addition to my lonely life) but I really had so much fun writing this for you. Despite not being able to write for Sangyeon and Juyeon (I was thinking about making three different fics but *sigh* time is a bitch). I hope we get closer in the future and that you enjoy this small silly fic I wrote for one and only, Eric Sohn hehe.
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Warnings: kissing, drinking, cheating, in a scene Juyeon jokingly implies that readers a bad person, um mentions of balls (don’t ask, just read), reader and Eric act stupid (way to much), mentions of peeing and all (plz don’t judge me yall 😭), PG 13 jokes (yes), reader jokingly says that she is in a relationship with a old man, mentions of doing excessive amount of drinking and drugs, few scenes inspired by TV show Gilmore Girls and a classic movie 10 Things I hate about you, some of it is inspired by Sabrina Carpenters song Santa doesn’t know you like I do.
Genre/trope: angst, fluff, friends to lovers, slow burn, hurt/comfort
Taglist: @cloverdaisies @kimsohn @mosviqu @from-izzy @mars101 @stealanity @deoboyznet
Sana: this actually took everything in me to write 😭. Like I have never in my life ever written slow burn so this was definitely a challenge! A big thanks to @mosviqu @from-izzy (especially izzy for giving me all those correct punctuations and all 😭) and @o-onikix for beta reading this huge ass thing of mine 😭 (also to my irl friend for reading bits and pieces and giving me the confidence)
Word count: 13,785
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“Are you coming to the Christmas party?” You hear Soyeon ask you. Stopping in your tracks in the middle of the hallway, you turn around to face her again as you give out a small sigh at her repetitive question. The answer was going to be the same either way so you don’t understand why she is so persistent on getting you to come to the Christmas party.
“No, I don’t think I am coming to the Christmas party thanks for asking tho.” You say as you give out a small annoyed smile before you continued walking to your next class with Soyeon tailing behind you.
“But why? It’s the last party you will get!” She says once she catches up with you.
“There’s…there’s prom?” You say with your lips pressed in a straight line. Dropping by your locker you pick up a few extra books you needed for the next class.
“Which you will never attend! Come on, it’s gonna be so fun at the party.” She says with a pout resting upon her lips as she shakes your arms back and forth trying to convince you.
“Parties are not my thing. You know it and it’s like any other typical party I have attended in the past. There would be loud music, then of course, alcohol which was sneaked in by others and in every other corner would be people making out. On top of that, no one has asked me out yet.” You tell her before you push her away gently and close your locker with a thud.
“No one is asking you because they’re scared you will reject them like every time.” You hear Soyeon mumble with the small pout still resting upon her lips as she played with her sleeves trying to gain your sympathy which she was miserably failing at.
“Even if I do come I won’t enjoy it.” You point out as a matter of fact.
“What about Eric? He can ask you out!” She suggests totally ignoring the fact that you just said that you won’t enjoy the party either way. But you let out a snort when you register the fact that she just said that Eric could ask you out. At this point it was a normal thing for her, in every other conversation she would always manage to bring up Eric.
She thinks Eric is the perfect boyfriend anyone could ever ask for and from her point of view she says that Eric is totally smitten for you which is most definitely not true because after all you both are just really close friends.
Despite the sweet names he calls you by, holding your hand when it’s cold to warm you up, buying food for you as his treat, the occasional sleepovers at his place on every Friday as you both cuddled together on the same bed and of course the way he’s always looking after you no matter what.
You still remember the day when you had fallen sick and Eric by all means tried his best to manage everything on his own. From taking care of you to helping you complete your notes despite being from different majors.
“Eric? He’s just a friend, nothing more, nothing less.” Saying that you start walking away.
“I beg to differ, every other person thinks that you and Eric are dating!” Soyeon says with a whisper.
“I don’t care what every other person thinks and that’s not even true, I mean yeah I used to have a thing for Eric in the past but I am over it. He already likes someone else I guess…” you say, your voice coming out small.
Giving you a look Soyeon looks at you with a knowing look “Are you sure about that?” She says before stifling a laugh when she sees the glare you throw her way.
“Yes I am sure about that and as I said before Eric already likes some else..” you say with a slight groan at the end.
“What are you talking about? Eric and Yuna broke up months ago and not to say you’re still single. It’s a perfect opportunity!!” Soyeon says with an excited smile now playing upon her lips.
“Nah, Eric and me are better off as friends I’d say.” Saying that you walk away from Soyeon and enter your class.
Taking a seat at the very end of the class, you place your bag and books on the table before you get your headphones out.
Looking out the window you looked at the calm stretched morning, it was like any other day you would have. The professor was blabbing away about something you did not care enough to pay attention to.
You would catch up on it later on anyways but the morning was ruined when the door slammed open and one of your peers, Sunwoo walked in with rage.
Standing right in front of you he leaned down to speak with you, “How could you leave me yesterday night? After the amazing night we had you just storm out in the morning just like that with no other thought in mind?? How could you Y/N!?” Sunwoo screamed loudly as he continued, “I thought we were heading som-” Another uninvited yell cut him off. getting cut off Sunwoo was interrupted with another yell.
“What the hell man? How could you just barge in like that? I told you, Y/N is with me now.” You see Eric say as he approaches you and Sunwoo.
“You stay out of this Eric!” Sunwoo yells at him.
“Why? Just because you cannot have her why blame it on me?”
“You asked for it you little shit!” Sunwoo yells at Eric as he pounces on top of him.
Looking around the room you see everyone whisper things while watching the fight unfold in front of them, and if that was not enough in came Juyeon with a security guard outfit on as he blew the whistle to stop the two of them from fighting.
“All right that’s enough you two!” Juyeon yells as he goes over to both of them and picks them up by their collar before he turns around and looks at you while still having a hold of them. “Y/N you should be ashamed of yourself for toying with boys like this! They used to have pride, they used to have dignity and most of all they used to have balls!” Juyeon yells as he starts dragging both of them to the door before stopping midway “Damn it Y/N, give them back their balls!” Saying the last line all three of them exited the class before laughter began to erupt everywhere.
Looking around you slide down against the chair trying to hide yourself. You knew being friends with them meant having some crazy experiences but never did you ever think that they would do something like this.
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Sitting in the cafeteria with Soyeon, you listened to her babble about something that happened in her class before she stopped talking when Eric approached your table with Sunwoo and Juyeon by his side.
You just observed him take a seat beside you before he grabbed a French fry from your plate. Sighing you just pushed the bowl towards him, suddenly having no appetite.
“I hated the stunt you pulled in the class today. Like no I do not have your balls. Just because you’re the son of a rich man does not mean you do this.” You say with a solemn voice as you drink your cup of coffee.
“Seriously Y/N? Having coffee at lunchtime?” Eric asked with a deadpan expression as he looked at you with confusion totally ignoring about the fact that you were mad at him.
“No, don’t change the subject. I am still talking. I mean who in the right mind would do something like this? It's so humi-” Before you could finish your whole sentence your mouth was stuffed with a bunch of fries in your mouth. Chewing onto them you glared at Eric before you looked away from him.
“Okay, I am sorry I did that. How about I make up for pulling this stunt which was in your language very much absurd and humiliating?” You hear Eric ask you. Stopping yourself from taking any more sips of your now almost empty cup of coffee you gave him a look of suspicion, not believing him yet.
“And how will you do that?” You say with suspicion evident in your voice, you did not even try to hide it.
“I know about a carnival which is happening in my area. How about I take you there? Good enough?” Eric asks with his hand out for a handshake.
“You pay for everything and buy me a soft toy?” You ask with hesitation before you grab his hand and shake it to seal the deal.
“Whatever you say, sweetheart. So I’ll meet you at your place at 4?” He asks before standing up from the bench. Nodding your head you give him a small smile as you wave him goodbye.
“Looks like a date,” you hear Soyeon say once Eric leaves the cafeteria with Sunwoo and Juyeon. Throwing a glare at her you stand and gather your things getting ready to leave for your next class.
“It’s not a date, he’s just making up to me for the stunt he pulled on me today in my class which was by the-”
“Very humiliating and embarrassing. Gee, you said that already Y/N. Say whatever you want but I totally see you two dating in the near future.” She says with an irritatingly knowing voice as she blows a kiss towards your way before she watches your figure walking away.
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Standing outside your house you look at your watch in impatience, it was 4:02 and there was still no sight of Eric. Rather than being mad at him for being late you were rather more concerned about him, what if something happened to him on the way here? Is he alright or what if he had hurt himself really bad leading to him being late?
Your train of thoughts came to a stop when you saw Eric’s car pull up at your driveway. Heaving out a sigh of relief you walk towards his car and take a seat in the passenger seat.
“Why are you so late?” You ask him once you put on your seatbelt and sit comfortably on the seat.
“Only two minutes sweetheart, why so worked up?” Eric says with a chuckle as he gives your head a soft pat with a teasing smile playing on his lips.
“I was worried about you. What if something would have happened to you while coming here? How would I know? You did not even give me a call. Why were you even late?” You ask him again with a frown evident on your lips and your eyebrows raised up in a tense manner.
“Aww, you were worried about me, sweetheart?” He says in a sing-song voice as he starts the car.
“No, I was not. I was worried about the fact that you got in an accident before you took me to the carnival.” You lied to him trying to cover up for yourself, you did not want him to get cocky about this again.
It did not take long for both of you before you reached the carnival. Stopping the car in the parking lot Eric parked the car safely without bumping into anything (which you were surprised at because a normal person would have gotten distracted by your constant yapping unlike Eric who paid attention to every single word you said yet managed to park the car safely).
Getting out of the car and locking it, Eric came and stood by your side as he subtly took a hold of your hand and intertwined his fingers with yours as he started walking towards the entrance without looking at your now red blushing face.
“Where do you want to go first, sweetheart?” You heard Eric ask which snapped you out of your train of thoughts. Looking around the carnival you saw the area for the prize stuffed animals.
Without any thoughts, you started dragging Eric towards the area ignoring his shoutings which were telling you to slow down.
Stopping at the game you looked at Eric before looking back at the stuffed animals, raising your hand you pointed at the animal you wanted “Can you win the penguin stuffed animal for me?” You ask him.
“Um…yeah sure, why not if that’s what you want sweetheart,” Eric says as he takes the arrows given by the worker and looks at the balloons intently.
He had five arrows and five chances to win the toy. To get it he would have to pop three balloons. Observing the balloons, Eric moved his hair out of his eyes as he threw the first dart.
—x—
“Eric, this is your third time. You really don’t have to go to this extent to get me the toy you know? Why don’t we just go to the Ferris wheel hmm?” You ask him tiredly as you shake his arms.
“Shhh I am trying to concentrate here. You know, as they say, third time’s a charm. If I don’t succeed this time, I will leave it okay?” He says as he starts to throw darts again.
And he did it. He did win you the penguin.
“Here, I told you I would get you this so I did. Do you like it sweetheart?” Eric says as he pats your head gently and softly grips your hand again before he starts walking towards a different area.
Nodding your head you stare at the stuffed toy in your hand lovingly and bring it close to your chest giddily as you hug it close to your body tightly “I love it so much! Thank you for winning this for me. I will always keep it close to me.” You exclaim happily.
“I am glad you like it,” Eric says with a sheepish smile spread across his face, glad that you were happy with the prize he won.
“You wanna try that?” You hear Eric’s voice beam with excitement. Looking up you follow his gaze and see the paintballs area. Giving Eric a knowing smile, both of you run towards the place with your hands still intertwined together tightly.
—x—
Looking around the place cautiously you look down at your bag of colour balloons again. Counting the remaining balloons you take a deep breath in when you realise you still have 10 left. That should do for now then.
Your train of thoughts were interrupted when you felt a cold balloon hit your neck. Snapping your head back you notice Eric standing behind you, a white jumper on which now had a bunch of different colours splashed onto it.
His hair was now messy as he held the dirty, balloon-filled bag in his one hand while his other hand had a balloon.
Looking around frantically you hide behind a huge pipe as you grab a balloon and wait for Eric to show up. Taking a peak you immediately throw the balloon in his direction which in return hits him on his stomach.
You saw Eric running towards your direction, picking your pace up,you started running away only to be caught by him in no time.
“Thought you could get away from me sweetheart?” Eric says as he splashes the balloon on top of your head which makes the paint fly everywhere.
“Okay okay, I am done. I don’t have any more left.” You declare with a defeated sigh. Once Eric lets you go, you take a peek at him only to see him look around the place. Taking that as a chance you grab the last balloon you had and hit it on his head which makes his hair dye the colour of the balloon.
Taking his shock manner as a chance you run away from the scene with laughter blaring through your throat and a content smile spread across your face.
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Sitting on the table placed by the food truck, you stabbed your fork into the pasta that Eric had bought for you. Having a big bite you looked around the place, admiring the lively atmosphere, the little happy giggles coming from the kids who were happily spending time with their families.
You later saw Eric walking towards your direction with a box of donuts in one hand while his other held a large iced cup of cold drink.
Reaching your table he placed both of the stuff on the table as he himself took a seat in front of you in exhaustion.
“Here, have some donuts and cold drinks. The line was so long like who the fuck drinks so much liquid at a carnival?” Eric says in annoyance
You look down at the big cup in your hand and then back at Eric as you slowly keep it back on the table “Well…us.” You tell him awkwardly before you grab the cup again and take a sip from it.
Eric stares at you for a moment before he looks at the cup filled with iced coke, “I mean, other than us, why would anyone want to drink liquid? What if they have to pee after drinking so much coke?” He pointed out as he raised his hand to point at a guy behind you who was peeing by the trees.
Looking away immediately, you glare at Eric in disgust and trauma.
“I did not need to see that thank you very much.” You say sarcastically as you take a bite from the donut which was in front of you. “But why would they pee after drinking coke?”
“Why won’t they? It’s liquid sweetheart. Everyone needs to pee after drinking liquids, be it water, alcohol or cold drinks.” He says as he grabs your donut and takes a bite out of it.
“Hey that’s mine! Grab another one.” You say with a scowl on your face as you throw a nasty glare towards Eric.
“But I bought it!” Eric argues back only to sigh in defeat once he realised that he cannot win against you. “Fine fine, you have it.” He says with a roll of his eyes jokingly before he speaks up again. “So do you have any plans for the Christmas break?” He asks before taking a sip of the cold drink.
“Oh, I am gonna be spending some time with my boyfriend!” You beam with happiness, a cheeky smile resting upon your cheeks.
“What…boyfriend?” He asks with confusion all over his face. I mean from what he can remember you had never mentioned anything to him about you finding a partner, so this was a sudden news for him.
“He’s a bit older, has grey hair and a beard, but rest assured he’s like super hot.” You tell him, a smile still playing upon your lips
“Are you serious right now or…?” Eric asks in concern as he places his hands on top of yours, stopping you from eating “Sweetheart please don’t tell me your boyfriends an old creep. Where is he even from?”
“He’s from a city which is colder than it’s here. He came here for his break to spend some time with me. Cute right?” You give Eric a small smile as you grab a donut and take a bite out of it ignoring the concerned glance Eric was throwing your way.
“Are you actually serious about this or you’re just joking with me and pulling my leg again? If you're, I am telling you, this is not a funny sweetheart.” Eric rambled on as his hold on your hands tightened in worry.
“Of course, I am not serious, but do you know who else is old and hot?” You ask him with peak interest as you lean closer to him trying to build up some suspense for him which you were clearly failing at when you saw Eric looking at you with confusion before he muttered out a small ‘what?’
“Santa.” you say with a straight face. You noticed Eric’s lips twitching upwards as he tried to stop himself from letting out a small smile at your silly response.
“Well thank god you were just joking about that old guy thing.” Eric says with relief washed all over his face as he leaned back on the chair with ease.
“But you have to agree, Santa is really hot and sexy. Like have you seen that beard and that thick figure he has? Like damn daddy, have some mercy on me please.” You say to Eric with a straight face, enjoying the reaction he was giving you.
Eric licked his dry lips as he stayed quiet. Not knowing what to say with your ridiculous statement and the unwanted information he just received about what you think about Santa.
“Whatever makes you sleep at night, sweetheart.” Eric says as a small smile lingers on his lips. Man, was he smitten for you?
Yes, yes he was.
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Laying down on your bed you spent the night watching shows. Soyeon lays beside you as she used her phone paying no mind to the ridiculous comments you kept passing to her whenever a character did something insanely stupid or idiotic.
“Oh wait, you never told me how your date went with Eric?” Pausing the show you stared at Soyeon when she beamed at you with such a ridiculous question, a silly smile falling upon her face as she stared at you expectantly waiting for your response.
“What date?” You ask with boredom present in your voice as you stare at the wall, not having the courage to look at Soyeon in the eyes.
“You know! The date with Eric! The carnival!” She says now shaking your arm aggressively as she let out a small whine at your uncooperative ass.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about..” you say in a sing-song voice before you push her away as she dramatically falls off the bed onto the floor.
You heard a gasp leaving her lips, “My butt!” She exclaims.
From the corner of your eyes, you see Soyeon stand up before she grabs your laptop and closes it shut before you can even reply. Grabbing it, she placed it aside on the side table before she slammed her body down on you with force.
“Tell me about your date or else I am not getting up.” She says, her voice coming out muffled since her face was placed onto your shoulder.
“I did not go on a date with Eric first of all! He is just a friend and get off of me! You’re fucking heavy!” You cry out in pain, your voice coming out a bit heavy because of the force Soyeon was putting onto your body, tho half of it was acting she does not have to know about that now, does she?
“Okay okay, whatever you say! Just tell me how your night went with Eric!” Soyeon screams in frustration as she stands up from the floor and looks up at you.
“What do you mean by my night? That sounds so wrong…you make it sound like Eric and I banged together…” you say with a pout as you play with your sleeves acting as if you were shy.
“Well…did you?” She says with suspicion evident on her face and her tone as she squinted her eyes at you while leaning down with her hands on her hips.
“No!” You scream at her as you throw the nearest pillow you caught at her. Throwing a glare in her direction you stay quiet. “Now I don’t feel like telling you about my friendly date with Eric.” You tell her as you show her your tongue and look away from her, sulking.
Hearing you say that, Soyeon groans in frustration as she sits down beside you on the bed again. “Don’t be like this. Tell me please,” she pleads while batting her eyelashes to you, a way to gain your sympathy back.
Groaning at her behaviour you close your eyes with the palms of your hands as a way to protect yourself from the sight in front of you. “Fine! Just stop whatever the fuck that is. It’s making me nauseous geez.” You say with a whine.
Hearing you say that Soyeon immediately stops batting her eyelashes as she sits straight while clearing her throat, “Go on.”
“Well nothing much happened, he won a soft toy for me, played a few games-”
“What kind of games?” Soyeon interrupts you in excitement.
“Paint balls…”
“Aww you guys had a date which was in 10 things I hate about you! So cute!” Soyeon squeals. Looking at her in disbelief and disgust you sigh as you continue what you were saying.
“We then ate, chatted a bit and he dropped me of. That’s it.” You tell her what happened.
“That’s it? No kissing? No nothing?” She says with disappointment in her tone of voice.
“Why would that happen? Come on grow up. Mine and Eric’s love life is way different, and his and my type are also very much different. He likes girls who are much…how do I say it…calm?” You say with a question mark evident on your features.
Soyeon shakes her head in disappointment as she lays down on her back on the bed “When will you both understand about the feelings you guys hold for each other?” Soyeon says mostly to herself but you catch on to it but decide to say nothing on it.
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Sitting at the back of the class you sketch in your notebook as you don’t pay attention to what your classmates are talking about.
Sighing, you look up for a bit and notice Sangyeon entering the classroom, dropping down your pencil on the notebook you wait for Sangyeon to approach you.
Picking up your bag, you keep it aside and wait for Sangyeon to take a seat beside you.
“Hey, what are you doing?” You hear Sangyeon ask you once he reaches your place. Giving him a small smile you look down at your sketchbook and then back up at him
“Nothing, was just sketching. What are you doing here though?” You ask with expectant eyes.
It was not that common for Sangyeon to be in your classes. He was in a different major so it was very uncommon for both of you to cross each other’s paths unless you both met at a party or just in the cafeteria where your other friends would be.
“Are you free this Saturday? Some of us are going out after our afternoon classes. Maybe you could join us?” Sangyeon suggests as he looks into your eyes with expectation
“I don’t know…do we have to bring someone along with us?”
“It’s not necessary, if you want to you can. Eric is bringing this…Yuna girl with him to tag along. You can bring someone if you want. Maybe Soyeon?” Sangyeon gives you a suggestion.
You just stare at him blankly when you hear him say about Eric bringing Yuna with him. You thought they had broken up…but maybe not? It was all just a rumour then, huh?
But what about the time you both spent together that day at the carnival? Was it not a date? Wait of course not, you guys are just friends. That’s it, right? Right?
“He got back together with Yuna?” You question Sangyeon, your voice wavering a bit at the end.
You don’t know why you’re even upset when you hear Sangyeon say this. You should be happy right? Happy for Eric getting back in a relationship with his ex-girlfriend? Happy for his love life at least going somewhere? But you were not happy. Not even a bit.
It’s as if someone had punched you hard in the gut which caused you to stop breathing and you felt like you were gonna faint any moment.
“I…I don’t know. He just said something about him inviting Yuna. I was not paying that much attention. I am sorry but is there something wrong? You don’t look so well right now.” Sangyeon said with concern laced in his voice.
“I am fine, yeah I just…I just need some alone time. I should get going. See you around!” You tell him as you tuck your hair behind your ear and start packing up your stuff.
“Wait! Are you going to come with us on Saturday? You can decline if you don’t want to. It’s alright-” Before Sangyeon could finish his sentence you stopped in your tracks as you turned back around and took a deep breath in before speaking again.
“I will come on Saturday. Don’t worry!” Saying that you rushed out of the classroom to your dorm.
You needed to vent this feeling to someone and there was no other person who could help you other than Soyeon.
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Entering the dorm you looked around the living room for any signs of Soyeon. Calling out her name you heard her voice in the kitchen.
Running towards the kitchen you just stood in front of Soyeon with tear-filled eyes, “I think you were right, So” You say softly as you looked up at the ceiling trying your best not to let your tears flow.
“What are you talking about Y/N? What was I right about? I mean I am always right..” she said in a joking manner but stopped immediately when she saw your tear-stained cheeks.
“I think I do have feelings for my best friend after all…” you say your voice barely above a whisper but Soyeon heard it crystal clear.
“I would have said told you so but looking at your condition, I think I can postpone it.” She says as she walks towards you and holds you in her arms. “Now would you tell me why you’re crying over the fact that you actually do have feelings for Eric? Shouldn’t you be thinking about how to confess to him or something?” She says to you while rubbing your arms to create some kind of warmth and comfort.
“He is…he i…back with Yuna I guess…” you tell her softly as you bury your face in her neck trying to control your uncontrollable sobbing.
“What?? But didn’t he break up with her?” Soyeon asks in shock as she stops rubbing your arms and pulls away from you to take a look at your now red eyes and tear-stained face.
“Well I thought so too but Sangyeon said that he invited Yuna over to the place they’re going on Saturday and I don’t know what to do. What if I lose him? I don’t want that!” You say with panic filling your voice.
“Don’t worry. I won’t let that happen. You and Eric are destined to be together and I know that Yuna is not permanent...I guess. I mean I hope so.” She said as she chuckled nervously while scratching her nape.
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Entering the barbecue place, you immediately noticed your group of friends sitting by a table in a circle. Soyeon decided to tag along with you as she had nothing better to do, I mean better for you.
Reaching the table you noticed that Eric was sitting beside Yuna as they both chatted without even sharing anyone else a glance.
“Oh Y/N! Great, you're here!” You heard Sangyeon beam making you divert your attention to him as you gave him a small smile and took a seat beside him as Soyeon sat beside Sunwoo.
“Yeah me and Soyeon had nothing else to do so thought why not just join you guys.” You say with a small chuckle.
“I am glad. Would you like a drink?” Sangyeon asks as he leans forward to grab a bottle of beer only to be stopped by you.
“No no, it’s okay. I don’t really drink much.” You tell him as you grab his hand so that he doesn’t get the bottle of beer.
“Well if you say so,” Sangyeon says as he pulls back and gets more comfortable beside you.
—x—
The night was still young. Most of the guys were drunk as they sang some songs the whole time while eating.
The whole time you tried your best to not steal glances at Eric but whenever you did, you always saw him chatting with Yuna, and every time you saw that you felt your heart ache in pain. You desired to be there instead of her but that’s not gonna happen, you both are just friends after all.
Looking around the restaurant you started to have trouble breathing. As if you were getting suffocated in there. The place was getting too stuffed for you.
Standing up you excuse yourself from the group as you walk away once you grab your bag and phone.
In the rush of getting yourself out of the place, you failed to notice the pair of eyes which followed your every moment, till he himself stood up and decided to follow you out.
—x—
Sitting down on the footpath with your heels in your hands you stared down at the ground with no thoughts in your mind.
Placing your heels down on the ground, you bring your arms up to cover and warm yourself up by the cold. You were already heartbroken, you wouldn’t want to catch a cold on top of that too knowing he wouldn’t be there to look after you since he is now a taken man.
“Hey,” you hear a voice say behind you. Already knowing that it is none other than Eric you don’t bother enough to look back up at him as you just continue staring ahead of you with no particular thought in mind.
You noticed him take a seat beside you on the footpath by your peripheral vision, you did not even bother enough to say anything back.
“Why are you out here alone? You might catch a cold sweetheart..” Eric says softly before he removes his jacket and places it on top of your shoulders.
Shrugging the jacket off you give it back to him without looking him in the eye. “You don’t have to do this anymore. People might get a wrong idea or something since you’re now back together with Yuna.” You mutter under your breath as you place the jacket on his lap.
“Why are you acting so cold towards me out of nowhere sweetheart?” Eric whispers softly as he tries to hold onto your cold hand only to get pushed away by you.
“Do you not get it? Eric…you’re now back together with Yuna! You cannot act like this with me now. People will think you’re cheating on her or something and I don’t want to be the other woman in a relationship.” You tell him what you had in mind as you take in a deep breath trying not to lash out at him and say something you don’t want to.
“Sweetheart, what me and Yuna have is totally temporary. I like our relationship, I like the fact that you’re my best friend.” You close your eyes in pain when you hear him say that you’re just his best friend. Exactly, nothing more nothing less. Those were also the words you said to Soyeon so why do you loathe these words now? It’s not like the meaning has changed or anything but your feelings surely did.
“That’s the thing Eric, I…” you inhale a deep breath in as you stop yourself from saying what you have been meaning to say. Yes, you liked Eric but ruining your friendship with him just for that is not worth it. Because even if you do get into a relationship with him, which is nearly impossible, what if you both break up? Your friendship and your relationship would be ruined forever.
“Sweetheart, please tell me. Don’t keep your feelings bottled up.” Eric says as he leans forward towards you and brings your body closer to his warmer one as he held your shoulders in a tight grip while giving your forehead light kisses to calm you down.
Just being in his arms at that moment made you break down in front of him. Your eyes immediately turned red, your nose turning a shade of pink as your cheeks started to get stained with your tears.
You saw Eric raising his other hand as he gently wiped your tears away, “Just tell me when you’re ready. I am always here for you.” Eric says softly
Taking a deep breath in you collect yourself together as you lean away from his warm embrace, you immediately feel the cold envelop you making your hands shake from the cold.
“Eric I…I like you. I never thought that I would ever have feelings for you in this way but the more time we spend together, the more my feelings grew. I always denied this feeling whenever Soyeon said anything but when I heard Sangyeon tell me that you’re back together with Yuna…I just felt my stomach drop. I felt hurt all over, I could not breathe properly because that was the time I realised that…that maybe I like you more than a friend. Now I know that we would never get together because of our differences but I just feel like you needed to know about this since well you’re my best friend and I tell you everything. I totally understand if you need some time away from me since this might have been a shock for you but please, don’t break up our friendship.” You say everything you ever wanted to let Eric know. You knew that this was probably a bad decision but you just had to let him know. “I should go now…see you around?”
You were about to get up when you felt a hand grip your wrist stopping you from getting up. Looking down at your wrist you noticed Eric holding onto it.
“Do you really like me?” He says as he leans closer towards you, his hand still gripping your wrist. Nodding a bit, you notice him lean even more closer as he leaves your hand and grabs a hold of your cheeks.
Both of his hands cradles your cheeks as he holds them delicately, staring deep into your eyes his gaze moves down towards your lips before he looks back up at you.
Placing your hand on his chest, you stop him before he manages to kiss you, “You cannot do this. You’re in a relationship with Yuna, it’s…it’s wrong.”
Groaning at your answer Eric goes back to his original place not having the energy to argue at what you said because no matter what, he was not a man who would cheat on a woman to be with another.
He was gonna kiss you because he was not in the right state of mind, right? Not because he might also be having feelings for you? No, he wouldn’t, if he did he would not have been in a relationship with Yuna.
“Oh Y/N! Great, you're here…with Eric?” You hear a voice say behind you. Looking back you notice Sangyeon coming out with a drunk Soyeon leaning on his shoulders.
Giving him a small wave you stand up from the footpath and walk towards him before getting a hold of Soyeon. “Yeah. I was just about to leave, I can take Soyeon back home. You can go back in and enjoy.” You tell him as you give him a soft smile.
“No, let me drop you off. Soyeon is already drunk so I will just drive you back to your dorm. I have my car with me.” Sangyeon says before he starts walking away with Soyeon still in his hold only to stop midway and turn back around to look at Eric. “You might want to go in and check up on your girlfriend Eric. She’s drunk and trying to kiss Sunwoo…” Sangyeon tells Eric with slight disappointment laced in his tone.
Giving Sangyeon a small nod, Eric looks at you with a longing gaze as he watches you walk away with Sangyeon and Soyeon.
Heading back towards the restaurant he opens the door and sighs tiredly when he sees Yuna babbling some incoherent words because of how drunk she is.
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Sitting by the kitchen counter you stare at Soyeon as she drinks the coffee you made for her.
“I am having such a bad headache…” she mumbles as she takes the last sip of the coffee and places the cup down on the table before she diverts her attention to you.
“So…are you gonna tell me about what happened yesterday or?” You breathe out a sigh as you place your head on your palms in agony.
“I confessed to Eric…” you tell her the truth. You could hear her let out a small gasp in surprise as she stood up from her seat and sat down beside you.
“What did he say?” She asks with her hands on your shoulder before she forcefully makes you face her.
“Nothing…but I think he was gonna kiss me if I had not stopped him..” you say with a frown resting upon your lips before you shrug off her hands and gaze at the floor.
“He what??!” Soyeon screams in shock, “You know what Y/N? I cannot look at you being heartbroken like this anymore. Why don’t you go on a date? Maybe that would make you feel better.” Soyeon says as a suggestions
“But I don’t think it would be fair for the other person knowing I still have feelings for someone else…” you tell her.
“It’s just one date. If you don’t like him you don’t have to go again and it’s not a big deal. He’s a friend of my friend so it won’t affect anyone. What do you say?” She asks as she stands up from her place and grabs her phone to make a few quick phone calls.
“If you say so…”
“Well, it’s done then! I will inform my friend to let her friend know about this.” Soyeon tells you with a smile resting on her lips. Returning the smile you look away from her and stare out the window with thoughts flooding your mind.
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Sitting alone in the bar you looked around in discomfort. Maybe coming to a bar alone with a man you just met today really was a bad idea? I mean...you did not know him personally except for the fact that Soyeon was a friend of his friend.
Agreeing to come to this date really made you fall back into this slump you were in. Because your love life was so bad that you had to go to this extent, meet up with a guy you barely knew, only for him to turn out to be this crazy person.
I mean, no one would want to be cramped in a car with 5 men they never met only to smell all the weed and cigarettes they were smoking on your face as they leaned onto you with no care in the world. This would barely even be considered as a date. Because who in their right mind does this on their first date? Does this person even know that this was a date?
Being lost in your thoughts, you failed to notice the now-approaching man, the man Soyeon thought would be good enough for now. I mean you cannot blame her completely because she did not know how he was.
Her friend told her that he was a good guy so Soyeon thought it was a perfect opportunity to match you up with him. Oh boy, Soyeon was gonna have it from you once you reach back home.
“We’re planning on going to the pool which is nearby. Come on, let’s go.” You felt startled when you heard him say that. Because no way in hell would you want to go to some random pool with a bunch of strangers who were high and drunk. You were sooo dreading this night you were in.
“I think I will pass on that. I will just leave now but thanks for the offer, Jonah.” You say with a slight smile as you start gathering your stuff, which is not much considering you only had your sling bag and phone with you.
“Oh let me drop you off…” he did not get to finish his sentence as he trailed off once his attention went back to his group of friends who did not seem to have a sense of reality whatsoever.
“It’s okay. It looks like your friends need you more than me. I will be fine.” You reassure him as you watch him walk out of the bar with his friends without looking back.
Sighing you open your wallet to pay for the beverage you bought for yourself.
“Fuck…,” Standing up from your seat you approach the nearest waitress you say, “Hi, could you tell me where the nearest ATM is?” You ask nervously.
“Oh, it’s a few blocks down, but I wouldn’t recommend walking there alone at night in this area. Many crazy stories about this place you know?” She says that as she walks away with a tray of drinks in her hand.
Sighing deeply, you slump down on your seat again as you stare at the contacts on your phone.
You most definitely did not want to call him knowing he was with his dear, bitchy girlfriend. But you had no option. It’s not like you want to risk your life going out in search of an ATM to take out some money. You had enough adventure today as it was.
You hated yourself for only thinking about him the whole time, the fact that he was the first person to come to your mind when you got yourself in this situation.
Biting on your nails, you nervously clicked on his contact name before putting your phone close to your ear, waiting for him to pick up as you looked around the bar once more.
“Hi, Eric. It's me…are you free right now?” You ask nervously. You tried paying attention to his background noises. So far, you could not hear a sound. The good thing was that you did not hear his annoying girlfriend's voice which made you feel somewhat better.
“Yes, yes I am. Are you in trouble or something?” He replied as you heard some shuffling noises coming from the background as if he was in a hurry.
“Yes, I am stuck in this bar and I have no cash with me and these people don’t accept credit cards and you were the first person who came in my mind to contact. I am so sorry if I am disturbing you.” You kept on rambling on as you felt as if you were a burden to him. I mean…you should be able to take care of yourself, but instead, you were asking your best friend to come pick you up from this unknown place you were stuck in.
And knowing what you two almost did yesterday made this situation all the more awkward for you.
“Don’t worry, sweetheart. Just send me your location, I am already in the car.” You heard Eric say. Ending the call you send him your location as you look around the bar while hugging your body.
—x—
“Eric!” You call out his name once you see him enter the bar.
“Hey, oh god thank god you’re okay. So what happened? What are you doing here?” He asks as he sits down in front of you.
“I feel so stupid, so Soyeon had this friend who knew this guy I was on a somewhat date with. From what Soyeon said the guy was in diapers or something.”
“The boy was in diapers?” Eric asks questionably as he looks at you with furrowed eyebrows.
“No, Soyeon said her friend knew him when he was in diapers but that’s not the point. I thought this date might go well, I might get myself a potential boyfriend, but no! The boy turned out to be a maniac. He was drinking, and smoking and god I hope he did not do drugs and that’s when I realised, that these are the last people I want to spend my last moments on Earth with. Like no what if I die in a car crash with them? I don’t want that and did I tell you how stupid I felt? Because I thought it was going to be a nice date but it turns out he had brought his friends with him and then oh god…” you sigh in frustration as you lay your head on your arms, tired from the events. “And I did not even eat anything since breakfast and I am starving but I have no money. How pathetic can I be?” You say to yourself while you stomp your foot on the ground in agony.
“Uh, I have money. I can pay for the meal, what do you want?” Eric asks softly as he asks for the menu to the waitress passing by.
“Do you want this to go on the tab?” She asks while handing out the menu to Eric. Looking at her in confusion, Eric stares back at you thinking you would know what she was talking about. “Oh, the card is still open. You can still order.” She says with a smile.
Giving Eric a look you look down at the menu. “Put your wallet away. Would you like to start with starters??” You ask Eric as you already start pointing out the dishes you want to have.
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“Whoa, I am full after having all of that.” You announce once both of you are seated in the car. Putting on your seatbelt you stare out the window.
“So um should I drop you off at your dorm?” Eric asks once he starts the car.
Looking back at him, you give him a nod. You knew he wanted to talk about that day again but you also knew about the fact that if he does bring it up, there is a huge possibility that you would have a breakdown.
The whole car ride there was silence. Both of you did not speak a single word to each other. To make the situation less awkward Eric did play the songs on the radio on low volume.
Reaching your dorm, you undo your seatbelt as you stare ahead of you not knowing what to say anymore.
“So um see you around I guess?” You hear Eric says as he breaks the awkward silence. Looking at him, you nod your head as you put your hand on the car door to unlock it only to get stopped in the middle.
“Wait, Y/N! I need to let you know something…” Eric speaks up before you could even leave the car.
You could feel him grab onto your hand as he made you sit back down on the seat.
“I hope you know that I do like you. I know that I said I only look at you as my best friend but…but maybe I feel something more than that? I am still trying to understand my feelings for you completely but please don’t shut me out like this. I don’t think I can ever go on with my life without you.” Eric says as he leans forward towards you and gently places his hand on your cheeks before he looks into your eyes.
“Please don’t leave me like this, sweetheart.” Eric whispers softly. Your gaze unknowingly travels to his lips as you bring your lips closer to his.
Softly placing your lips onto his you start moving them in sync with each other, his chapped lips on your soft ones felt like a perfect pair to you.
Bringing your hands up to his chest you deepen the kiss more, moving your lips in sync you could feel his hands roaming all over your body.
Entangling your hands with his hair you pull on them a bit making Eric open his mouth which gave you an access to enter your tongue in.
You could feel both of your tongue’s fighting each other when you suddenly snapped out of it and pushed Eric away from you.
From the corner of your eyes, you could feel Eric look at you with a hurt gaze but before he could even speak up you had already opened the car door and stepped out of it, “See you around!” You say that in a hurry as you close the door with a small thud and walk away from there to your dorm.
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Closing the main door you slide down with your back against it. Bringing your hand up to your chest you hold it as you take in a few deep breaths.
“Y/N! Are you home?” You heard Soyeon shout from the living room. Not giving her an answer back you just stay on the floor not knowing what to do anymore.
You did not know why you did whatever you did back there. I mean kissing a taken man? That’s not good. Then making out with him? That’s worse.
“Oh god! Y/N! What happened??” You hear Soyeon shout in distress as runs towards you before sitting herself down on the floor with you.
“Did something happen at the date? Oh god, I am so sorry. I should have asked my friend more about that guy before setting you up. Did he turn out to be a total creep and a jerk?” Soyeon rambles off before she helps you take off your coat while you were still on the floor.
“I kissed him..” you tell her with your eyes staring at the wall which was in front of you, “I kissed him Soyeon and he’s…he’s taken. I am horrible…” you say with your voice wavering at the end.
You could feel the tears sliding down your cheeks which you did not bother enough to wipe.
“You kissed Jonah? Why?” Soyeon says in confusion as she takes a seat beside you before bringing her legs close to her chest as she rests her head on her knees and stares at you.
Slowly bringing her hand up she pulls your head towards her as she gently places it on her shoulder.
“I kissed Eric…” you say softly.
“What…but isn’t he?” Soyeon did not bother enough to complete her sentence.
“Exactly! I am so horrible. I cannot believe I let my feelings get the best of me. He practically cheated on Yuna with me…” you say with a crack in your voice. Sniffling, you look at Soyeon with sadness feeling your eyes. “Please don’t leave me just for this. I promise I am not a horrible person.” You cry out before your sobs grew harsher with each second.
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Sitting in the cafeteria alone you kept on playing with your food. It had been days since your last encounter with Eric.
He had not been coming to school ever since you guys kissed in his car, some part of you was glad that he did not attend the school because then that meant you wouldn’t have to face him but the other part of you was rather more worried about him.
All those what if’s returning to your mind, is he hurt, is he sick, did he wrap himself up in some kind of trouble? But your questions were left unanswered.
Sighing, you grab your bag as you start walking away from the cafeteria to the place where Eric’s best friend would most certainly be at.
You had to know if Eric was alright, all you needed to hear from them was that ‘Yes Y/N, Eric is alright. You don’t have to worry too much.’ That would at least make you worry less and not stress over anything.
Reaching the back of the school you see Juyeon and Sunwoo talking with each other as they played some video games on their phone.
Walking towards them, you stand in front of them grabbing their attention “Oh hey Y/N, what makes you come here?” Juyeon asks with his eyes still glued to the screen.
“Nothing, I just wanted to know something. That’s all. Could you stop playing for a moment and pay attention?” You ask both of them, now getting annoyed at their behaviour and lack of attention.
Pausing the game Juyeon and Sunwoo look up at you with a confused face, “What’s up?” Sunwoo says awkwardly. Not knowing how to react to your sudden appearance
“Do you know where Eric is?” You ask them the question straight away. Not having the energy to beat around the bush anymore.
“Ah, did you not call him?” Juyeon says as if it was a normal thing for you. I mean normally it was, but not after you kissed your best friend and then walked away when you got back to your senses knowing that he is taken.
“If I would have called him I wouldn’t have been here now, would I Juyeon?” You say sarcastically as you flick his forehead in irritation and also because of how stupid his question was.
“Ow sorry and to answer your question Eric caught a…a cold a few days back so he was taking a break?” Juyeon says to you. From the way he was talking, it felt as if he himself did not know what he just said.
Looking back at Sunwoo you throw a glare in his direction when you notice him laughing at Juyeon. Seeing you look at him like that he immediately stopped laughing as he looked down at the ground too scared to look you in the eyes.
“Fine then, if that’s what you say so.” Saying that to them you walk away from the place with numerous thoughts floating in your mind.
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The next day when you entered the school hallway with Soyeon by your side, your eyes moved all over the place in search of Eric.
Walking towards your locker with Soyeon you noticed Eric standing by the class door with Juyeon, talking with him.
Handing all your books to Soyeon, you took big steps towards Eric, “Eric! Wait!” You shouted out his name only to get no response in return.
What you did not expect was for him to walk right past you without sparing you a glance. Stopping dead in your tracks you move your body around and stare at Eric’s figure walking away.
You noticed Juyeon turning his head back and looking at you with sympathy as he mouthed out a ‘sorry’ on behalf of Eric you suppose.
Giving him a small nod and a wave, you go towards Soyeon again as you take your books back from her hands, “Let’s go?” You say quietly as you start walking away from the place without letting her speak anything any further.
“I am sorry…” Soyeon says to you softly as he interlocks her hands with yours as she starts walking with you.
Giving her a smile you look down at the ground not knowing what to do anymore.
You knew you messed up when you initiated the kiss first. But did Eric really have to ignore you like that?
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It had been a few days since you last saw Eric again, he has been really irregular at school so confronting him face-to-face was not an option.
You tried everything, you called him, texted him, hell you even went over to his house but there was no answer.
The more time passes, the more worried you’re getting. Is he avoiding you on purpose? Is all of this happening just because of you? All you wanted to do at this point was make everything right but you could not do that. Not with the way Eric was treating you.
Is he now avoiding you on purpose? There were so many thoughts in your mind, so many questions but they remained unanswered.
Groaning in frustration you grab your coat and storm out of the house to go over at Juyeon’s. You were gonna get answers from him today, if he does not give you a proper answer you won’t let him off the hook and that’s for sure.
—x—
Stopping your car in front of his house, you stare at his front door with hesitation filling your body. Should you really be doing this? What if you’re crossing the boundary by doing this? Is this too much? Probably not right? I mean Eric did not break off your friendship with him just yet.
Stepping out of the car you lock it as you take slow, hesitant steps towards Juyeon’s house.
Ringing the doorbell, you wait for him to open the door. Okay, there’s still some time. You can just turn around and leave the place right now. That way you won’t have to confront him about Eric again.
Getting ready to turn around you were stopped by a voice calling out your name, “Y/N! Surprised to see you here…what brings you here tho?” You hear Juyeon ask with surprise laced in his tone of voice.
Looking at him with an awkward smile plastered on your face, you lick your lips thinking of the right words to say to him.
“May I come in first?” You say nervously as you shift your weight from one foot to another.
“Yeah sure, you’re always welcome. Come in…” Juyeon says as he steps aside for you to enter his house.
Removing your coat, Juyeon takes it from your hand and hangs it on the coat hanger as he leads you towards the living room.
“Want some hot chocolate? I was making some for myself…” Juyeon says as he walks towards the kitchen with you tailing behind him.
Taking a seat by the counter you shake your head as a no as you clear your throat, “I am here to speak with you about something that has been bugging me…” you tell him before you stare at his back.
You notice how he stopped pouring the hot chocolate into his cup before he turned around to give you his full attention, “Is this about Eric?” Juyeon asks slowly before he takes a seat in front of you.
Nodding your head you suck in a deep breath, “You see, I have been trying to reach him for days but he isn’t responding to any of my texts or calls. I even went over to his house but there was no answer. I know he is your closest friend and the fact that he shares everything with you so I probably know that you must be having an idea on why he is doing this. Please just tell me…” you say on the verge of tears.
“Y/N I don’t know if I have the right to tell you about what’s happening with Eric right now. Look, I know what you’re going through is really tough but…” juyeon stops talking when he sees the tears coming out of your eyes. “Y/N no…” Juyeon sighs softly as he stands up from his seat and pulls out a chair to sit down beside you.
“We’ve always shared everything, you know? And him just shutting me out like this suddenly pains me. I know I was at fault for kissing him but I regret it immensely right now because I certainly know that I might have ruined his relationship with Yuna. Look, all I want to do right now is just make things right with him. Just tell me where he is and I promise I won’t trouble you again.” You beg to him, sniffing you look at Juyeon with your red eyes and nose.
“If you say so. Eric’s at the hospital, his dad's been severely ill for the past few weeks which has led to him missing out on school and everything. Now I know that I told you this but don’t tell Eric. He did not want you to worry too much about him.” Juyeon says as he stands up and brings you a glass of water.
Getting a hold of the glass you take a few sips as you place the glass down on the counter again. “Thank you so much.” You say as you stand up from your chair, “Are you guys gonna plan something for his birthday tomorrow?” You ask him right before leaving.
Thinking for a bit Juyeon shakes his head as a no “He did not want us to do anything this time. He said he would be too busy tomorrow to even think about that.”
Nodding to his words you grab onto the door handle only to get stopped when Juyeon spoke again “Hey Y/N…”
Turning around you look at Juyeon with a slight frown on your face, “Yeah?”
“Please take care of yourself…” he says softly before giving your back a gentle pat.
Nodding to his words with a small smile on your face you open the door and walk towards your car, now somewhat feeling relieved.
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Standing in front of the hospital you look down at the cake which you had bought just for Eric. You knew that he would be busy looking after his father so the least you could do for now is buy him a cake so he can at least celebrate his birthday today.
Entering the hospital you go to the receptionist. “Hi, I am looking for Eric Sohn, his father was admitted recently.” You tell the woman sitting at the front.
You see her slide down her glasses as she stares at you for a minute or so before she starts flipping through the pages in front of her with no questions asked.
“Mr.Sohn is on the first floor, room number 111 and here’s your visiting ID. Do not lose it.” She says sternly before she goes back to doing her work.
Nodding at her words, you immediately scurry away from there.
Entering the elevator you press on the first floor button as you wait in silence. You did not know what to say to Eric once you met him.
You guys were never this awkward. Even when the first time you both met, the conversation with you both just flowed right.
Never did you ever think you would be in such an awkward position when it came to Eric and this just made you feel worse than you already were.
—x—
Reaching the floor you start walking towards the room Eric’s dad was in.
Standing in front of the door you stare at the scene in front of you through the glass window.
There stood Eric holding his dad's hand in his own hands as he spoke to himself. You could see that he was shaking, probably because of the cold or the fact that he was in fact crying.
Knocking on the door you wait for Eric to look up at you, once he did divert his attention in your direction you could feel yourself forgetting how to breathe when you saw his face.
He looked pale, probably a bit thinner than he used to. He most certainly lost a bit of weight which made you feel like you just hit rock bottom because why were you not with him when he needed someone by his side the most?
Taking a step back, you wait for Eric to collect himself together because obviously, this was a shock for him seeing you here in the flesh after not responding or talking with you for days.
“Sweetheart, what are you doing here?” Eric asks you once he comes out of the room after trying to make himself look presentable enough.
“It’s your birthday, so I brought you a cake.” You say with a smile playing upon your face as raise your hand up to show him the bag which had his favourite cake in it.
“Who told you about me being here?” Eric asks, his voice sounding serious yet it still held that gentleness in him that he always has when talking with you.
“That does not matter. What matters is that I am here for you right now. Please just…just celebrate your birthday with me?” You ask him softly as you walk backwards and sit on the seats which were placed outside. “Look I know you’re in a rough spot right now, but all I ask from you today is for you to spare a few minutes max to max and just celebrate your birthday. I promise I won’t ever trouble you again.” You say the last line with difficulty.
Sighing Eric walks towards you as he sits down beside you. Closing his eyes he makes a wish as he blows out the candles which you had lit for him.
Opening them up, Eric cuts the cake as he feeds you a piece of it.
—x—
Taking a stroll on the rooftop of the hospital, both of you talked with each other about what you have been missing out on.
You kept Eric updated on all the things that have been happening in school since he has been missing out a lot. You told him how Soyeon almost choked Sunwoo because of how annoying he was. In her defence, Sunwoo had no reason to keep on troubling her and in the end, Sunwoo did get what he deserved.
You also promised to keep him updated on all the classes he has been missing out on despite being from different majors, which Eric was immensely grateful for.
Stopping by the railings, you and Eric stared at the night sky, the moon which was now shining brightly as you looked for stars that were covered by the clouds.
“Y/N, I have been meaning to tell you this…” you hear Eric say with a serious voice. Turning your gaze to him you notice him looking at you with no expressions on his face.
“Look, I…I like you sweetheart. I really do. The time we spent apart these past few days, I understood my feelings towards you. But at the moment, I really don’t have the time to commit to a proper relationship yet. I don’t think I have it in me to be in a committed relationship and with everything going on, I don’t know if I can truly give you the proper attention you deserve. I know you like me, I like you too but…now’s not the right time. I don’t even know when my dad will be all better. Hell, I don’t even know if I can still come to school regularly. I am so sorry.” Eric says as a tear rolls down his pale cheek.
Wiping the lone teardrop, you give him a small broken smile as you immediately take a step back, too afraid you would do something you would regret later on.
“Well, at least you told me about this.” You say as you sniffle. Looking up at the dark sky you try to keep your tears in which Eric immediately took a notice of.
“No, no please don’t cry because of me, sweetheart..” Eric says softly as he immediately engulfs your smaller figure in his own warm one as he tries his best to comfort you by keeping your body close to his and hugging you tightly.
Pushing him away gently you take another step back before you give him a shake of your head. “I think it’s best if I leave now…” you say, your voice wavering a bit at the end “Happy Birthday though…” you say with a small smile.
Saying that you immediately walk away from there, not having enough courage or the energy to look Eric in the eye after what he just said.
You knew you should not have kissed him. This is all because of you, and now because of this small mistake, you lost a friendship that you used to value and love so deeply.
Meanwhile all Eric did was watch you walk away from him with tears rolling down his cheeks.
Kneeling down on the ground he brought his knees closer to his chest as he started sobbing, his body shaking violently with each sob leaving his mouth.
All he wanted at that moment was for your arms to be around his body, hug him closely but that was not possible since you were not there with him anymore. He had lost you, forever.
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Entering the dorm, you don’t care enough to inform Soyeon about your arrival. Entering your room you slump down on your bed with a tired sigh leaving your mouth.
You could feel your body giving up, you don't even know what you’re going to do anymore at this point. You did everything you could to make things right but nothing worked.
What if you would have not went over to Juyeon’s house, would things right now be different, maybe even better? Or maybe if you would not have gone over to Eric today, to celebrate his birthday this would not have even happened.
Biting onto your pillow you stop yourself from letting out the sobs you were dying to let out. You knew Soyeon was sleeping right now, you did not want to be a burden to her anymore.
“Y/N? Are you okay babe?” You heard Soyeon’s soft voice speaking through the doorway as she slowly opened the door to your room and let herself in.
“No Y/N…” Soyeon says mostly to herself as she immediately joins you on your bed. Lying down beside you, she hugged your body closer to hers from the back as she patted your head whispering sweet things in your ear, hoping that would calm you down.
“I am so pathetic, So…I just…I wish I could just die right now. I cannot believe I just ruined my friendship with Eric. I…” you could not even get yourself to finish the sentence as you let out harsh sobs, not being able to control them anymore “I ruined everything…” you say as a hiccup leaves your mouth.
“Shh, Y/N if anything Eric is also with you in this. It’s not like the kiss was one-sided. He kissed you back…” Soyeon says as she continues to pat your head.
The entire night, all you could remember was crying your eyes out as you spoke incoherent words to Soyeon. You knew you were gonna have a puffy face and a bad headache tomorrow morning.
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It was the 31st today, the day everyone would be rejoicing since in less than 24 hours it would be the start of a new year, a new chapter of everyone’s life, a new beginning to something beautiful for some people, sour reality for some of them since they were dreading this time of the year since their whole lives.
For you it was no different, you were not in the mood to celebrate with your friends, and you did not have the energy to even leave the comforts of your bed after everything that has been happening in your life.
It was just you, your bed, your laptop with your favourite TV show on loop and the cup of hot coffee that was with you since day one.
“Are you sure you’re just going to be okay to stay here all alone on the new year?” Soyeon asks you as soon as she enters your room. Giving her a nod you wave her goodbye.
—x—
Checking your phone, you frowned in confusion when you saw 20 missed calls by Eric. 20 missed calls? At this time of the day? By Eric? Why would he even call you?
Immediately dialling his number, you wait for him to pick up the call only to get sent off to voicemail.
Getting worried you get out of your bed in a hurry as you grab your car and house keys and head towards the door.
Opening the door you jump back in surprise when you see Eric standing in front of you with his hands placed on his knees as he took deep breaths in while trying to catch his breath.
“Why…why the hell were you…not picking up your calls!?” Eric shouts at you while still trying to catch his breath.
Standing up properly, he wiped his forehead with the back of his hand before he looked you in your eyes, “Are you free?” Eric asks once he his breathing had gone back to normal.
Looking down at the attire you were wearing, you stare back up at Eric with an awkward smile. “Well looking at the fact that I am in my pyjamas I think I am free yeah.” You notice Eric roll his eyes playfully as he enters your house and grabs your coat which was hanging on the coat hanger.
“Wear this. It’s cold outside…” Eric whispers in your ears as he helps you wear the coat.
“Where are we going though?” You ask Eric, noticing the impatience.
“Just start walking will ya?” Eric says as he grabs your hand and intertwines his fingers with yours unknowingly.
—x—
You both had been walking on the twinkling footpath since the last few minutes. The silence had engulfed you both but this time it felt more comfortable rather than awkward.
You looked around the busy streets of the road as everyone was out there celebrating the last day of the year with their loved ones.
Reaching a calmer and quieter street you looked around the place when you noticed that there was no one around and it was just the two of you there.
“Okay sweetheart, what I am about to tell you, just please listen to me before you say anything okay?” You hear Eric say. Turning around to face him you notice Eric taking a seat on the grass as he stares ahead at the scenery which is in front of him. “Come sit.” He says as he pats the place beside him.
Sitting down beside him you screech in surprise when Eric pulls you closer to his body while grabbing onto your waist. “That’s better,” Eric whispered softly before he took a deep breath in.
“I missed you…” he says softly as he straightens out the strands of your hair which were flying around everywhere.
Looking him in the eye you softly respond to him “I missed you too. All I did was think about you since our last encounter and I…I am sorry.” You whisper that, afraid your voice would break if you speak any louder.
“I wanted to tell you something, I just couldn’t get myself to say it out loud because I was afraid something would happen.” You give him a look of encouragement, a sign for him to continue speaking which he caught on immediately.
“I love you Y/N, I knew that when we were away from each other and I was sure of my feelings for you when we had that talk on the rooftop of the hospital. I was just so caught up in the fact that my dad was on the verge of dying I unknowingly pushed you away. I knew I left you in the dark after just disappearing after we had kissed that day in my car and that was no way in hell right but…I was just so much in denial about the fact that I love you more than a friend. I was freaking out over the fact that I might lose you if our relationship does not go well, I was afraid that I would mess it all up when we got together but when we had a talk on my birthday, I realised that you’re the only person I will ever love this much, I just love the way you smile when I make a stupid joke even though it was not funny. I was afraid that if I confessed my feelings we would not be able to spend Christmas together, which we did not because of my stupidity. I missed the time when we would bake the cookies on Christmas Eve, I missed the time when we would wrap the gifts we bought for our friends for the Christmas even though they were utterly ridiculous but most of all, I missed spending time with you sweetheart. I missed hearing your sweet voice, I missed the fact that you were not the first person who wished me a Merry Christmas. I love you Y/N. I truly do and this time, I am ready to commit. Commit for us and for this relationship we would have in the future. Would you take the honours and be my girlfriend?” Eric says as breaks down in tears at the end of the sentence.
Grabbing his cheeks, you make him look up as you lean closer and place your lips on top of his, you could taste the saltiness of his tears but the sweet taste of the lip balm he was wearing.
Smiling in the kiss, you move closer to him as you move your hands towards his neck as you pull him closer towards you. You could feel the slight smile that appeared on his lips.
Being lost in the kiss, you both failed to notice the snow that had started to fall, that was until you saw the small snow that rested on Eric’s nose which made you let out a small giggle.
“What’s so funny sweetheart?” Eric says between the kiss as he kisses you deeper, not even letting you answer the question he had just asked.
Pulling away, you look at Eric with a wide smile resting on your cheeks, your smile reaching your eyes, his favourite kind of smile of yours truly.
“Is that a yes then?” Eric asks as a giggle escapes his lips. Giving him a small nod you peck his red nose as you let out a small laugh.
“See, I can be the one for you sweetheart.” Eric says with a silly smile on his face before he starts peppering your face with kisses making you fall down on the grass as laughter blares through the quiet place.
“I never said you couldn’t…” you say with laughter. “I love you, Eric Sohn…” you whisper softly as you look up at him while lying down on the ground, as Eric stared down at you while being above you.
“I love you too, sweetheart.” Eric whispers the last words as he kisses you deeply.
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goodfornothingstar · 6 months
Text
I have a guilty pleasure of reading Jegulus fics. Despite I shouldn't because of reasons-
#1 They are repetitive in their characterization. James is never shown as canon James that is cruel, arrogant and intelligent. Regulus is changed to diluted version of Sirius but with some self preservation because the dude went to Slytherin.
#2 I am majorly into Prongsfoot (obviously into romantic James and sirius for all those requiring clarification). So I feel like I am cheating on my babies for reading this fic where james is with sirius's brother.
# I hate wolfstar and Lupin with a passion. And if you had read a Jegulus fic, you will know that that pairing doesn't comes without wolfstar. Like ever. Ever. So, even though I have to suffer through this painful thing, I read it.
Why?
Because of the drama available there. Obviously. You get fluff. You get black brothers, you get strong women characters, you get different tropes and what's ifs, you get an ending where first war has better result as compared to canon.
But I hate it too because -
#1 James will never even look towards Regulus when he has the better black brother sirius right in front of him 24*7
#2 Sirius will never give a damm about remus when James is right in front of him for 24*7
#3 These fics forget that besides from the Wizarding war being about blood purity, it was also about dark wizards fighting for their rights. And Regulus black was a dark wizard. So okay maybe he does not want to be killing people for their status but if he also didn't want to be a dark wizard then you are making him sound like a very disfigured imitation of sirius but only more coward version who is a spineless, worthless follower.
I mean let the dude be a person who does not give a damm about whether other people are killed for their blood as long as he and his people are safe. Let him practice dark magic because he is a proud dark wizard unlike sirius who is a closeted dark wizard and has to hide his affinity to that part of magic just to fit with his friends.
#4 Every single Jegulus fic shows walburga and orion as physically and emotionally abusive parents. When I think it was never the case. I believe that with war on the horizon and with strong personalities, sirius and walburga clashed all the time because of their belief system. Walburga distanced herself when she felt that sirius was lost case and started focusing on Regulus who up until the point was not paid much attention.
Regulus was too happy to make his parents pay him attention, became even more malleable to their belief system in search of that affection while sirius thought that nothing he could do would be any better than Regulus so why try. He was jealous of his own brother. Like any normal child he resented his brother for getting his parents love. It was crystal clear in ootp if people dared to pay attention. {No but we were all busy paying attention to that brotherly hug in poa to have any brain cell remaining to pay attention to other books. Lol}
Why the reasons for sirius running away need to be exaggerated. Look around yourself. Have seen some parent child relationship in which there is no abuse involved, but still miscommunication, expectation, circumstances and belief were the reason of their estrangement.
#5 That point where you are reading form Regulus's pov and he has these abandonment issues because of sirius leaving him alone and not taking him away too and you feel for the guy because he is laying his heart out for his audience to see how much he suffered. He blames sirius and James. I feel that bullshit. First of all I think that Regulus was supper happy that he got to be having the sole attention of his parents. Again my version of his parents were not abusive people just two people who didnt know a thing about parenting. The guy was Slytherin, he liked winning. But he was also hurt by his parents still not being as concerned about him like they are of sirius, even when he is disowned. He hated his brother for having that concern in his parents' mind even now. He wanted to be better. He wanted to make them forget that sirius ever existed. He overcompensates by joining DE, he was not forced. He wanted to be make them pleasantly surprised when walburga never wanted that of her sons. She just wanted them to be bigots like her.
She absolutely despised the idea of her youngest bowing to someone. When Blacks are supposed to be the topmost. Practical royalty.
Regulus when he found out that his parents are in fact not happy with his decision, felt betrayed first and then lost. When he got the actual reality of death eating business, it was too late and he felt that he had no one in his corner. His only friends were all DE and quite happy in it. His parents were silently disappointed.
So when he found out about horcrux. He thought that he can make it upto his parents. But also he did not want to seek their help in his embarrassment. So he seeked to do it by himself and met his tragic end. Also I head canon that he could have fought to survive but his will to survive was lost because he felt adrift with no one to confide the complexities of his life, he felt alone. And he accepted death quite quickly with a relief because he was lonely in the world full of opinionated people.
So the bottom line is that I read Jegulus and then I hate myself for reading it. Because it is bullshit. But it has drama. And fanfics are their to entertain us even if it makes me pull my hair out and gauge own eyes.
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inlovewithpandora · 10 months
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- Endless Cycle -
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Pairing: Aonung (23) x fem!reader (21)
Synopsis: Your relationship with Aonung was a toxic one. He’s cheated on you several times and you always let him sweet talk you into taking him back. What happens when you finally reach your breaking point? What happens when you’ve finally had enough?
Content/Warning(s): modern au/human au, serial cheater Aonung, infidelity, caught cheating, destruction of property, crazy (slightly unhinged) reader, toxic relationship, strong language, full angst
Authors Note: I had fun writing this, I hope you all enjoy! (My first Aonung fic!)
- italicized words indicate a flashback
- If you see any mistakes please excuse them
Word count: 3.2k
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You and Aonung have always gotten into arguments due to both of you having strong personalities but the most recent fight between the two of you caused both of you to not see each other for multiple days. You've been sitting by your phone anticipating his call, hoping that he would crack first.
You knew it was probably stupid, stupid that you were hoping for his call after what he did but you just couldn't walk away from him. As you sat by the phone desperately waiting for his call you began to think about the argument both of you had a few days ago.
"Aonung I'm sick of going through this shit with you!"
"y/n I'm not trying to hear this today okay?!"
"No, you must like me yelling at you because you continue to repeat the same actions that get us in this same position!"
You and Aonung always have this same argument every few weeks and it always ends the same, you yell, he apologizes and says he's never going to cheat on you again, and you believe him.
He always feeds you these empty promises and you eat them up every time, hoping that one day he'll stay true to his words.
"Aonung I swear to Eywa if I find out you cheat on me again it's going to get ugly" You place your pointer finger on his chest forcefully.
"I promise y/n I won't that was my last time" he grabs you by the waist, pulling you closer to him, and plants his lips onto yours.
Every time both of you had this conversation you said that same sentence but every time you found out he cheated you didn't do anything. Aonung just saw it as empty threats so he would always kiss you just to make you quiet and you always fell into his trap, you always let him have this effect on you.
After both of you made up not even a few minutes later someone called his phone. You look down at the contact ID and saw the name 'Alicia💦'
"Who is this Aonung?! Is this one of those hoes you've been messing around with?!"
Aonung let out a groan of frustration and grab his keys and began walking toward your front door, "I'm leaving I'm not going through this with you again"
"Fine! Leave! I don't care!" You really didn't want him to leave but you pretended that you did. You knew he was going to go whoever this girl Alicia was it just upset you even more. As you watched Aonung walk out your front door tears began to fill up in your eyes, you hated this endless cycle with him. Every time he did this to you it created a painful slit on your heart.
*ring* *ring* *ring*
The ringing from your phone snapped you out of your thoughts, A grin became plastered on your face as you saw Aonung's name on the screen. You immediately click the accept button, "Hey Nung! I'm so glad you call—"
You began to hear some strange noise in the background which made you fur your eyebrows, "Aonung? Can you hear me?"
You didn't hear him respond to you, but he did respond to someone else. "Fuck j-just like that" you could hear him groan. As you listened two things clicked into your brain, number one he must've butt dialed you and number two he was cheating on you again.
Your blood began to boil as you continued to hear him murmur words that were equivalent to the pleasure he was receiving from whoever this woman was. You knew he would do this again after he promised you he wouldn't, you knew he would just repeat his serial cheating cycle but you were going to put a stop to that right now.
You knew he most likely couldn't hear you but you decided to speak anyway, "Aonung I'm coming to your place right now, if that girl is still at your house when I get there I'm fucking you up!" You hung up the phone and began to put on your shoes. You grabbed your car keys and began walking toward the front door, right before you walked out of the house you saw the pink baseball bat that you keep next to the door in case of emergencies.
"Oh, I'm going to have some fun using this" A smirk spreads across your face as grab the bat and head out the door. You jump into your car and begin to drive to Aonung's house.
By the way you were driving some people would describe it as 'like bat out of hell' but you didn't care. You needed to get to his place as fast as your car would allow.
It normally took you twenty minutes to get to his house but by the rapid speed you were going you made it in ten. As you pulled wildly into his driveway you could see two cars indicating that the girl was still there. A laugh began to erupt from your throat as you began to think about the damage you were about to create. You put your hair into a ponytail, grab your bat, and began walking to his door. You had a key to his house so you began to unlock it quietly so Aonung couldn't hear.
As you swiftly moved the key inside the lock the door opened, you took the key out and walked inside while closing the door slowly. As you walked throughout the house you could hear Aonung and the woman moaning in sync as the sound of their skin slapping together echoed around the house. As the sound flowed through your ears it made your eye twitch and your grip tighten on your bat, you wanted to run in there and just start smashing things but you had another plan.
A plan that was for sure going to throw Aonung off completely.
You walked into the living room and saw both of them fornicating on the couch. You wanted to laugh at how much of the downgrade the girl was compared to you but you keep your composure.
Both of their eyes were closed and they were just so caught up in themselves that they didn't even notice you. Instead of acknowledging your presence, you sat down at his kitchen table waiting for one of them to notice you. After a few minutes of sitting there silently, the woman opened her eyes and saw you and you could see the spooked look written all over her face. A mischievous smile spread across your face as you waved at her.
The girl immediately began to get Aonung attention, tapping him and pointing over to where you were.
"What are you pointing at?" He turned around from the couch and saw you sitting at the table which made him move the girl from on top of him and begin to cover himself up and grab his sweatpants to put on, "Y-Y/N this isn't what it-"
You immediately start brushing him off, "No no Aonung don't let me stop you" You begin to look over at the girl who was frantically putting her clothes back on. "Is this Alicia or is it one of the other girls you're cheating on me with?" You ask him in a calm yet fierce tone which confused him.
He was always used to you blowing up and getting angry so seeing you so serene with a smile on your face made him fearful. He had a feeling that today your 'empty threats' weren't going to be so empty.
"I-I'm Lisa" the girl spoke up quietly
"Nice to meet you Lisa, can you leave I would like to speak to my boyfriend alone please" Lisa doesn't waste any time and begins to grab her things while scrambling toward the door and leaving.
"You know you promised me that wouldn't cheat on me again right?"
"Y-yeah I know-"
"So why did you do it again Aonung? Hm?" You asked him as you begin walking toward him. As Aonung watched you swing the bat in your hands so effortlessly it created a lump of worry in his throat.
"Y-Y/N w-what are you d-doing with that bat?"
"Don't worry about that Aonung just answer my question, why did you do it again?" You tap the point of your metal bat against his tan skin which creates a rubble of nerves in his chest.
He tried to pry his mouth open and speak words but he couldn't, the only thing that would come out was the oxygen he was exhaling.
You stood there waiting for his reply and when you noticed he wasn't going to say anything you began to shake your head, "You know what Aonung... I've given you way too many chances without any kind of repercussions so I'm starting now" you walk back over to his beautiful glass kitchen table and slam your metal bat into it.
As your bat made contact it make the glass shatter all over the granite tile which made Aonung's eyes widen at the scene in front of him, "Y/N are you crazy?! What are you doing?!"
"Maybe I am a little crazy" you say with a chuckle as you walk over to his eighty-five-inch television "but you made me this way, you know that right? You made me like this because you KEEP deciding to be unfaithful to me! I think you do this on purpose because you THINK that I'll allow you"
"No no Y/N that's not true—"
"Yes, it is! You only do what I ALLOW you to do, I ALLOW you to cheat on me so you do it. And then I look like a fucking fool when I think you're going to change! You feed me all these lies and I believe them like an idiot but I'm done with that!" You lift your bat and begin to swing it toward the television
*bam* *bam* *bam*
With each swing, you caused more damage to the television. Each swing portrayed the anger you felt, it was coursing through your veins, pumping through your body at lightning speed. The screen was completely cracked with lines spreading all over the screen from the impact.
"Stop Y/N! Stop!" Aonung shouted at you as he began to grab you and pull you away so you could stop your path of destruction.
"Let go of me!" You yelled trying to squirm out of his grip. "Why should I stop?! Huh?!" you finally manage to get out of his hold and begin making your way outside "You never stopped cheating on me so why should I stop destroying things?!"
You opened the front door and began walking outside to his car, the one thing you knew he prized the most.
"Y/N I'm sorry okay? I love—"
You turned around and faced him, "Love?! Really Aonung?! You got to be kidding me right?"
Hearing his attempt to say that three-letter phrase made you feel so irate that you felt like smoke was going to come out of your ears.
"IF YOU LOVED ME Y-YOU WOULD SLEEP WITH ALL THESE DIFFERENT WOMEN!"
Aonung begins to frantically shake his head "No y/n I love you, I don't want those other women I just want you!" He pulled you towards him, placing his hands on your waist. "Just please don't break the car okay?"
You scoffed at his last sentence, you used your free hand and shoved him harshly "FUCK YOU AONUNG! YOU DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT ME AND OUR RELATIONSHIP, YOU JUST WANT TO TAKE CARE OF THIS FUCKING CAR!"
You lift your bat towards the car and begin to swing, "But don't worry when I'm done you'll have a whole lot to take care of" You begin to smash his car doors, creating huge dents and bending the material inward.
Aonung was now yelling at you, begging you to stop but of course you didn't. You wanted him to at least feel a fragment of the pain he caused you over the years of your relationship. You want him to feel the agony, the suffering, the tears, the heartbreak. You wanted him to feel all of that and some. You knew that by doing this it wouldn't amount to the emotions he's made you feel but you still wanted to try.
"I *slam* HATE *slam* YOU *slam*" You began to bust each one of his windows, with each forceful swing it caused the glass to completely shatter and fall onto the pavement and the inside of the car.
As you yelled at him hot tears pouring from your eyes, "I GAVE *slam* YOU ALL OF ME AONUNG *slam* AND YOU PLAYED ME! YOU TOYED WITH MY EMOTIONS LIKE I WAS NOTHING! *slam*"
Aonung watched you destroy his car he began to cry at your words. He began to realize how he emotionally manipulated you over the years and he was feeling a sense of guilt. He knew what he was doing to you was wrong but he still did it regardless. He did it because he always knew you would come back to him but he realized he broke you. The y/n that he once knew before was long gone, the girl who would keep accepting him back into her life after being unfaithful was no longer there.
"y/n please put the bat down" his tone was no longer harsh, the yelling stopped and his voice turned to a tone of calm that caught your attention. You turn around and notice the flow of tears down his face which surprised you, "WHY SHOULD I STOP? ARE YOUR TEARS SUPPOSED TO MAKE ME FEEL GUILTY FOR DESTROYING YOUR 'PRIZED POSSESSION' BECAUSE I DONT! I'M SUPPOSE TO BE THAT FOR YOU AONUNG NOT SOME STUPID CAR!" you scream at him so loud that you begin to feel a sting in your throat.
You loosen the grip on your bat and it falls to your side, you begin to sob putting your face in your hands as your tears drop onto your palms. As you cry you begin to feel a warm embrace engulf you, "I swear I'm sorry y/n, I truly am. I love you with all my heart, my soul, my mind, everything in me" Aonung spoke softly into your ear as he tightened his arms around you.
The words he spoke sounded so sincere, those were the words you've been wanting him to say. When the words fell off his lips mixed with his warm embrace made you feel warm, it made you feel loved by him. As you laid your head on his shoulder and cried you realized you were once again falling into his web of lies, letting him say sweet words so you could forgive him.
you almost foolishly believed him hoping that his words were true but deep down in your soul you knew that he was just saying whatever he knew would get you to forgive him and move forward with the relationship.
As you were starting to come back to your senses you began to smell Lisa's perfume on his skin which brought you back to the reason all this happened in the first place. You shove him away from you for the second time today but this time it was fueled by fury "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME AONUNG BEFORE I HIT YOU WITH THE BAT NEXT!"
As you continued to yell at him you noticed that there was a whole audience outside watching the argument take place. People were watching from their lawns and others looking out their windows.
"IM NOT FORGIVING AND FORGETTING THIS TIME AONUNG, I HAVE DONE THAT TOO MANY TIMES IN THE PAST, AND WHERE DOES IT LEAVE ME?! BROKEN AND HURT! I CAN ONLY HANDLE SO MUCH AONUNG AND YOU'VE PUSHED ME TO MY LIMIT!"
The look on Aonung's face was a guilty one. All he could do was look at you with sad eyes while just standing there not being able to form a single word.
"I LET YOU WALK ALL OVER ME AND I STILL TOOK YOU BACK! I STILL LET YOU BACK IN AFTER YOU CHEATED SO MANY TIMES I CANT EVEN KEEP TRACK ANYMORE!"
The more you yelled, the more fury spread through your body. Your chest was moving up and down at a rapid rate from how heavy you were breathing and veins were popping out your neck. All you could see was red and you began to have the urge to physically attack him. You knew that if you gave into your impulse the neighbors watching would instantly call the police and you didn't want to jail for battery and assault.
You began to slowly back away from him and take a deep breath so you could try and calm yourself down, "I'm leaving you for good Aonung, I can't deal with this and you anymore" you said calmly as you begin to grab your keys out your pocket and walk away. You knew that you needed to just leave and get out of this situation.
You got inside your car and put your key in the ignition. As you begin to put your car in reverse you hear banging on your car window, "Y/N PLEASE I LOVE YOU DON'T LEAVE!" Aonung yelled as you backed out of his driveway
You just roll your eyes, "Aonung please get out of my way before I hit you" You were speaking in a soft but stern tone, trying your best to stay calm before you burst a blood vessel.
"No, you're not leaving me!" he ran from the driver's side window and moved in front of your car. As you watched him stand in front of your car it just irritated you by how dumb he was acting. You fully rolled your window down and stuck your head out the window, "Aonung move from in front of my car before I run your stupid ass over!"
Aonung didn't move an inch. He decided to continue standing in front of your car, trying to keep you from leaving his house. You kept trying to reason with him but he just kept shaking his head and telling you he wasn't moving.
You put your hand on your gear shift and put it in drive. You place your foot on the gas pedal and begin to put slight pressure on it.
"Aonung you have one more chance to move!"
"I told you I'm not moving!" He spoke sternly as he slammed his hands on the hood of your car
"Fine Aonung have it your way!" You put more pressure on the gas pedal, moving your car forward and pressing into Aonung's abdomen.
Suddenly you heard and thump and saw him rolling over the top of your car as you drove away. As you adjusted your review mirror you could Aonung's body sprawled out on the ground barely moving a muscle...
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I hope you enjoyed💗!
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deltadarlingf1 · 8 months
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On the Reality of Dating a Famous/Wealthy Man:
I was going to post this on Twitter but decided I wanted to a do a long form post. So an explanation of this tweet, which was inspired by the screenshot just below it:
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First a disclaimer: I am not at ALL saying Mick is anything like the men I'm about to talk about (I genuinely doubt it). I'm using this response to him hard-launching his relationship as an example of the mindset I see in a LOT of the young female F1 fans. If you read the gossip blogs, you've seen posts like this and worse, particularly on Charles, Pierre, Danny, and Carlos's gfs.
As I said in my tweet, if these young girls knew what it can be like behind closed doors for the WAGs of the rich and the famous, they probably wouldn't make statements like this.
I see a lot of younger fans here on social media posting their imagines and fan fics, and as someone a bit older than them, it does worry me. I know for most people it's simple fantasy and fun, but when I see things like the above I know there are some younger girls that really just don't get it.
My aim in posting this is that maybe it'll be a bit of a reality check for some of those girls. And I don't mean that in a bullying way, I mean that in a "please don't look at these smiling pretty girls with the closet full of designer, perfect body, and seemingly perfect life and feel bad about yourself" way.
Lastly, how do I know any of what I'm about to talk about? I wish I was just chatting shit, but I have lived through all of what I'm posting below as the daughter of a "man" of wealth. His money came from corporate life, not fame, but when you have as much as my "father" did/does, you rub elbows with the famous. Everything I detail below happened to me, my mother, and the wives of my "father"'s coworkers. I'm now watching history repeat itself as I've moved up the corporate ladder and find myself around millionaires and billionaires on a regular basis.
1. The "Starter Wife" Phenomenon
In wealthy circles there's the concept of a "Starter Wife". This is the woman wealthy/famous men marry because they were high school sweethearts, worked together early on, or they dated before the man had his "come up". Sometimes men marry these women and have kids for the SOLE purpose of having the "Family Man" persona. For famous men, this can be good PR. For wealthy men, this can boost their career.
A lot of these men fucking HATE their wives. By the time they have money, they want the freedom of single life back. They can now afford their "dream woman" and loathe being "stuck" with their current wife because of it. Leading to:
2. Serial Cheating
These men have all the money and resources they need to live a double life. Not to mention built-in time and an alibi: They're on the road all the time for their job, work trips, events, etc. No time unaccounted for because they're always working.
Some of those work trips to wine-and-dine clients include runs to the local strip club, escorts, and in some cases some of those escorts are of INCREDIBLY questionable age (in reality, they are victims of trafficking). Again, I wish I was talking out of my ass, I have seen this shit with my own eyes and wish to the Gods I hadn't. Then there's also:
3. Domestic Violence
This is bad enough when it's a wealthy man whose built that "Family Man" persona to protect himself, but it's even worse when they're famous. No one believes the victims, in some cases the woman is financially stuck and can't just take the kids and run when it happens.
And for some women it hard to leave the man they thought their partner was and, yes, to let the lifestyle go. Speaking of the lifestyle there's:
4. The Loneliness
This is a big one for the F1 girlies I see posting their imagines and fanfics and what not. The fairytale of "he'll make time for me because he loves me and I'd be special. I'd be different."
These men are busy as shit. That Cartier Bracelet you envy on these girls is often a "sorry I missed your birthday". The big bouquet of roses is a "sorry I had to leave our trip early." Yes, we know the joke "well at least I can cry in a Ferrari", but that shit will wear on you more than you can believe. I can't tell you growing up how hurt I was when my performances were missed, major dates were forgotten, or my proud life updates were met with "yeah, uh-huh, hold on I have to take this call."
Of course there are good times, of course there's memories you'll cling to, but when you're out, you often realize how alone you felt in the relationship. Lastly, and most poignant with this F1 WAG nonsense:
5. Keeping Up Appearances
You're no longer your own person in a relationship with these men, you are an extension of them. With famous men, you're a part of their "branding".
You have to look a certain way, act a certain way, talk to the right people, have the right friends. In the corporate-wealth world, that means making your partner look good, playing the part of the trophy wife and perfect mother. Smile in front of those coworkers that you know just spent the last business trip drinking, gambling, and cheating on their wives. Wear the right dress to the corporate dinner to make his coworkers envy him, but don't dress too sexy or he'll grow angry and think you're trying to cheat.
If you're dating someone famous, by the GODS, you better look immaculate in every post. You better be there to support him at his events, but if you're there too often you're "attention-seeking". You better have model good-looks, but if you ARE a model, you're "a jobless loser trying to profit on him". Don't post him on your IG, but if you happen to post that you're in the same city as him, you're "dropping hints". If he posts you, it's only because you "probably begged him to".
It's a maddening dance where you cannot win for losing. And once you break up, enjoy letting the world decide if he should have stayed with you, or if they're relieved that he finally got away from "that selfish bitch".
Do what you will with the above. I just wanted to get it off my chest. But I do hope that maybe, MAYBE, it'll give someone that needs it some perspective.
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raginginkedslut · 7 months
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𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕎𝕒𝕚𝕥𝕣𝕖𝕤𝕤 𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕂𝕚𝕟𝕘
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
This is my first fic everyone so please feel free to give advice, this will be a series, I hope you enjoy 💕
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Warnings: slight mentions of mental abuse if you squint, infidelity.
Daddy Elvis in the 70s
Although there is no smut (yet) this is not appropriate for minors so if you are under 18 do not read!! 🔞
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Chapter 1: Drinks on me
After leaving your ex fiancé for cheating you find yourself at a dead end job, saving for a way out until you meet Elvis, he is persistent to take you out and you agree but will it end in romance,lust and passion or Hate,Heartbreak and Tears?
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*    *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
The Memphis air was hot, unreasonably so, you were used to it being hot but this was something else, you had been working all day at the diner you’d been at for the past few weeks, you’d been saving up to get your own place and move out from the apartment you shared with your ex fiancé, things had ended horribly when you walked in on him on top of some floozy he met at the club he did security for, now it wasn’t the best paying but it was better than nothing,
You where just cleaning the last table before the end of your shift when the door swung open and a group of men came in laughing and joking, you sighed as your boss gave you a look pleading you to serve this last group, you put on your best customer service smile walking over to the table, as your eyes saw a familiar face in the group beautiful black locks slicked back with a few strands falling down his forehead and big sideburns trailing down the sides of his face, the bridge of his nose held black sunglasses with gold frames, you froze realising why he was so familiar, Elvis god damn Presley you thought, you realised you had been stood there slack jawed for a little longer than you had hoped, before you could speak Elvis piped up “you okay there…” he hesitated bringing his sunglasses down to read your name badge “y/n?” You snapped out of your trance, “sorry sir, what can I get you fellas” he chuckled “I’ll have a Pepsi darling” you blushing at this pet name, his cronies gave you there drink orders not ordering any food and you walked to make everyone’s drinks, you could here laughing and joking but as you looked up Elvis wasn’t engaging, he was just sat staring at you, feeling those pools of blue burning into your skin, his mouth turned up into a wink smile, you rush over red faced with the drinks, “anything else I can get yous” one of the pals perks up and teases “ your number would be nice baby” looking embarrassed Elvis rumbled and glared at the man quickly shutting him up “ that’s all for now doll” he purred at you, causing you to smile as you walked away.
after a little while longer they finished up there drinks.
Getting ready to go leaving there money on the table, the men began piling out of the diner until it was only that tall Adonis of a man, now, he was significantly older than you and didn’t look how he used to, looking his age a bit now but that’s how you liked him, a little chunkier, those sideburns, those gold adorned fingers , everything about him made you mad “hey darling” you snap back once again staring at him for too long “yes sir “ you replied with a shy smile “sir?…” he groaned “that makes me sound old honey” he then chuckled lightly “guess I am, well I was wondering if you wanna go out for a drink sometime” he spoke hopefully you looked up at him and sighed “ I can’t I’m…” before you can finish you see the disappointment in his face “ oh it’s fine honey I’m probably to old for ya any way” he tried to deflect his embarrassment with a laugh, you grew closer, closing up the gap between you whispering slightly “ it’s not that i don’t want to, because trust me, I couldn’t think of anything I’d want more” he smirked at you “then why doll” he closes the gap even more “ I’ve just broken up with my fiancé not long back and I’m trying to get out, I can’t be getting myself tangled up in a mess when I’m just getting out of one” you see a sense of relief on his face knowing that you do want to see him again “you can come live with me” he half joked “only if there’s enough room” you chuckled back his face then lit up “ d’ya know what, i might just have enough room for you “ you giggled putting your hand on his shoulder“ look, get off work in 5 mins, think you could wait for me then we can have that drink” he grinned a crooked smile, you wagged your finger at him and semi sternly “ nothin too serious though “ he laughed and put his hands up in defence “ I’ll try, but I can’t help it if you fall for me” you bite your cheek to stop a smile forming on your face , going to turn back around it hits you and you grumble “ I have to go back to my apartment and get changed “ realising you where a sloppy mess from your shift “ ah no worries darlin, I’ll just come with ya” you looked at him and grimaced “ I don’t think that’s a good idea, a still live with my ex fiancé “ he laughed “ yeah ex… don’t matter none I won’t embarrass ya” you sighed grabbing your purse “ it’s not that it’s just…he’s a bit of a fan, he’s loved your music since he was young” your face looking saddened, Elvis saw this and pushed his finger gently under your chin to look at him “ he hurt you baby doll?” He questioned, you tried holding back tears as one escaped, that was all he needed, a wicked smile crossed his face “ all the more reason to make him jealous y/n baby “ you looked up at him and smiled wiping away the lone tear “ okay…”
You linked arms as he escorts you to his sleek black car, opening the door for you, the drive was nice, filled with chatting and laughing after a while you sighed, “ it’s just here “ he pull into the carpark of your apartment block, you brace yourself and get out of the car, he smiles reassuringly at you, this does little to comfort you as you open the door , your ex sat there cigarette in mouth, young blonde floozy on arm he starts to speak as he notices you come in “y/n you get my smokes” you hiss “ no you didn’t give me the money “ he grimaces at you “you’re such a bitch that’s why I left you…” his words trail off into mumbles as Elvis walks in glaring into your exs soul “ that ain’t no way to be treating a woman” he growled, your ex stood up standing there in shock and disbelief for just a moment when the excitement hit “god damn you…you’re Elvis Presley!” He put his hand out to shake Elvis’s looking down at his hand in disgust he replied “ last time I checked” he put his hand down hiding the embarrassment, “baby” he nudges the young blonde “ this is the singer I was showing you “ she looks up and is not fazed, she was far too young to know exactly the impact Elvis made on the world , looking back down at her magazine your ex introduces himself “ I’m Ronnie it’s such a pleasure to meet you, what’re you doing here “ Elvis smirks and looks down at you , wrapping his thick arms around your waist, “ just waitin for m’girl to get ready so I can take her out” Ronnie’s face drops “ your girl?” Elvis pulls you closer, you blush as he spits l” yeah you got a problem with that boy” he shakes his head “ n…no Elvis…it’s just she….” He gets cut off as Elvis interrupts “ it’s Mr Presley to you, and she what, hm, you two still together?” Ronnie mumbles “no mr Presley” Elvis smirks “ right well then, my girl will be getting ready” you looked at him and smiled.
You ran to your drawers and picked out a cute little number a short cut pink dress and pink kitten heels you fixed your hair and makeup before making your way back to Elvis “are you ready to go” you mewled at him “yeah baby let’s go “ his hand travelling to the arch of your back, leading you to the door “what time will you be back” Ronnie shouts “ Elvis whips his head round “ I don’t think that’s any of your business boy ,but since you asked, she won’t be “ you smile as he guides you out shutting the door behind you.
You look up at him and gently peck him on the cheek”
How funny, sticking up for you to your ex and making him sweat
How cute, calling you his girl and making you feel safe
How hot, claiming you as his own…..and you were, you just didn’t know it yet
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Thank you so much for reading I hope you liked this!, if you want to be added to the tag list for the next chapter lmk!
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