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#i don't think fans should do it either though like i certainly would never send an actor my fic or ask them their opinion on a ship like...
popculturebuffet · 5 months
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Disney 100th Birthday Special: Top 12 Disney Television Animation Shows
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Happy Birthday all you happy people! And it's a very special birthday as it's the 100th anniversary of a company that, while I routinely mock on a regular basis for impaling themselves about a dozen time a year, has brought me a lot of joy. It was a 100 years ago that the wonderful world of disney began and 100 years later it's still bringing us some of the finest and funnest animation around and will likely continue for a hundred more as they create a whole disney planet serving up mickey shaped foods for all time around a disney owned star.
So before we can look forward to happiest dystopian future off earth, I thought hard about what I wanted to do for the 100th. I've covered disney a LOT on this blog: season 3 of ducktales AND the arcs for the two seasons before that, seasons 2 and 3 of both amphibia and owl house, classics like the Lion King and A Goofy Movie, a whole year worth of house of mouse reviews, shorts, various comics great and donald being pro illteracy.. the list could go on for an entire article itself.
So while I had PLENTY of options, from a shorts marathon to another movie, I decided the best way to honor this occasion was by focusing on a portion of disney near and dear to my heart: Disney TV Animation.
Way Way Back in the 1980s, DisneyTVA was formed by fresh faced executive overlord Michael Eisner. Eisner was looking to expand his new empire, and found a clever way to do it. See at the time while there were certainly good cartoons, most had the budget of a paper clip and a piece of string. It's why Disney took this long to get into the game: Walt thought he just coudln't get the quality needed on a tv budget and while he WANTED to at some point, he passed before that could happen.
Many laughed at this decision, citing it as a huge money sink waiting to happen.
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Yeah critics not taking animation or kids watching it seriously isn't new and assuming they'll just watch anything is laughable. Yes low budget shows like Transformers got plenty of views... but transformers also put in high quality voice actors and intriguging designs. Take both of those and make the animation bouncier, and kids would notice.
And they did: The first Disney TVA show, Gummi Bears, was a massive success, leading to the planet sized one that was Ducktales and a whole legacy of classic shows.
There is a double edged sword here though: While most of these shows are high quality and well loved.. Disney tends to.. ignore they exist. They don't make merch, think adult and teenage fans aren't a think, and when it comes to merch don't usually tend to make it for these shows during or after their runs. There are exceptions and they are reviving stuff.. but disney has a bad habit to prefer cashing in on nostalgia than on what they have now unless it fits their narrow perameters
For me though.. Disney TVA is home to some of the best, most game changing shows in the medium. From shows I grew up with to shows that sadly just ended, Disney has made a ton of shows permeanntly embded in my heart. My doctor says I should get that removed but what does he know. At this studio are creators who are passionate, create unique works, and work very hard to stand out. Even when shows get slapped with the dreaded 2 season limits, they still stick in our hearts not just because of that nostlaagia pop disney wants, but because they were just that good and still hold up into adulthood. I've covered a lot of this library, owe my career to these shows and will never sotp being impressed by them.
So out of the 42 i've seen I whittled it down by 30 which was way harder than it sounded down to the very best. A few shows like Gargoyles I sadly just.. hadn't watched, so if something's missing it was either that or a very hard cut. Whlie the top 8 was shockingly easy, it was hard to narrow this list down to the very best. I'd also like to point out that this is my opinon: feel free to send me your own lists, i'd be curious to see how your own personal experinces shaped yours. But for now this is mine... and this is my top 12 best disney telvision animation shows.
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12. The Weekenders Created by Doug Landale 2000-2004 4 Seasons, 76 episodes
Our #12 is a childhood faviorite of mine.. and also one of the two shows your most likely to hear me bitch about disney+ not having. IT'S BEEN ALMOST 4 YEARS.
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But bitch complaning about disney being disney aside, the Weekenders is a charming classic that needs more eyes on it and it's weird I haven't covered frankly.
At any rate Weekenders is a slice of life show with a good yet simple hook: it follows 4 middle schoolers, Tino, Carver, Lor and Tish, as through their weekends from Friday after school to monday morning. It allows for the show to do pretty much whatever it wants, and what it wants is to be a fairly lowkey slice of life show. The only really zany element that I can remember, or that I saw in ToonrfiqTariq's excellent retrospective of the series, which you can find here, is main character Tino, a sarcastic but kind guy played by voice acting royalty James Marsden, talking to the audience zack morris style, which is really just a neat way to move things along so it's not that obtrusive. I highly recommend that retrospective by the way. Tariq is awesome and it helped jog my memory on the show.
The series is a fairly low stakes affair: our heroes have a fairly typical problem, they talk it out or deal with it as the weekend goes on, and at least once an episode they go for pizza at an ever changing pizza restraunt with a fun new gimmick each episode, something I loved already as a kid but love even more NOW as an adult knowing that gag was likely a LOT to do. Keep in mind they had to draw new backgrounds, exteriors, and a new costume for the guy running it every time. It's the kind of joke you think a series would've given up on for those reasons but nope, every episode has one.
Weekenders is a throughly charming slice of life show, helped by it's characters: In addition to tino we have the egotistical Carver (Phil LaMarr) thickheaded jock Lor (Grey DeLise) and immigrant nerd and vegtarian Tish. While the four coudl've easily fallen into their sterotypes there's just enough depth to the cast to make them work. Tish in paticular was my faviorite, not only being one of the first immigrant stories in a show I saw that was largely respectful and not just
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It's a great show I genuinely wish I had more to say about. Find it somehow if you can, it's entirely worth it.
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11. Phineas and Ferb Created By Dan Povmire and Jeff "Swampy" Marsh 2007-2015, 20XX- 129 Episodes, 2 Movies, Upcoming Revival
At a time when kids animation wasn't in the best place, Phineas and Ferb was the smash hit we all badly needed. Done by vetran creators and Rocko's Modern Life Alums, Phineas and Ferb was a fun, creative show about two boys who simply wanted to make the best out of summer... and happened to be child progidys only limited by their immgination, so they could do anything and the utterly catchy theme song helpfully outlined it. Having only watched the first three or four seasons, I still don't know if they ever found Frankensteins' Brain. It was over there.
While the a-plots with the boys were great most of the time and had a great supporting cast: Helpful scout Isabella, shrill voiced nerd Baljeet and bully turned buddy Buford, the real draw for most of us was the b-plot: each episode the boys Platapus Perry would sneak out, don a fedora and foil the plots of his arch enemy and best buddy Heinz Doofenschmirtz, an awkward mad scientest who rather than therapy decides to deal with the many, MANY traumas in his life by building various inators and talking to Perry. Their shenanigans inevitibly undo whatever our heroes did in time for their mom to never notice and just think their sister Candance needs help as she tries to bust them.
The show mostly used this loop for it's lengthy run, ocasionally mixing up the setting by visiting the kids grandparents or with a special, but it mostly went like this. This started as the shows strength as the repitition allowed them to REALLY play with the formula: lampshade it, subvert it, and play with it. Sometimes Perry would go to foil doof but it ended up being something benign like Doof trying to do a party for his Daughter or go on a date. Sometimes the boys would genuinely be trying to help Candance or she'd have her own concerns outside of bustin making her feel good. The show packed this with tons of lampshade hanging, catchy songs (after an early one made the network want it once an episode), and genuine heart. It's hard not to root for Phineas and his optimism and genuine cheer. Depsite "driving our sister insane" being a main lyric.. the kid has nothing but love in his heart for his sister and that simple goal of just wanting to do something fun or help someone each day makes this one of the sweeetest shows around.
So your probably wondering why it's so low. And it's really simple: it's constant status quo.. kind of wore it out for me. After a while there was no real reason for Linda NOT to know the boys were doing this. We never got any indication she'd care beyond "Maybe wear a helmet" or "Have candace watch you", neither of which would really STOP what they do every day. While Across the Universe was a great movie it having a MASSIVE snapback at the end is what eventually got me out of the show. It was hard to invest when the show wasn't willing to really change anything. In hindsight I do get some shows just function better as status quo shows and my bitterness has lessened and it's why this show ended up making the list: it's status quo could be frustrating.. but no one had more fun playing with it at the time than these two kids. And the hunchbacked old man what fights/is common lawed married to their platypus.
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10. American Dragon: Jake Long Created by Jeff Goode Developed by Eddie Guzelian and Matt Negrete 2005-2007 2 Seasons, 52 Episodes AmDrag was part of the teen superhero boom on kids shows in the 2000's. Classics like Danny Phantom, My Life as a Teenage Robot, El Tigre and more came about at this time, with disney only dipping it's toes in twice with this show and another we'll get to soon enough.
That said.. American Dragon is an excellent show, mostly down to it's core: The show follows the titular Jake Long, a guy who on surface, from rapping part of his theme to his frosted tips to his skateboard comes off very much like an energy drink came to life and starred in it's own show. Which given the 2000's i'm very suprised never happened. But jake is somehow likeable.. he's a bit arrogant sure, but his arrogance is only in his skill: He genuinely does try his best as protector of new york, cares about his friends and cares heavily about his crush Rose. He's got a heart to him beneath the layers of axe body spray and Dante Basco's standout performance, what would easily have been his defining role as a VA had avatar not come along soon after, helps make this guy feel human.
What also helps boost it's show is it's myth arc. Like Danny Phantom a year before it, AM Drag breaks from the style of the time to have a dedicated arc and continuity. There's plenty of monster of the week stuff, some better (like the oracle twins, easily my faviorite side characters , who also have the fun gimmick of one being super cheery yet predicting horrible things and the other being jaded but seeing only good, with their powers being why (If you see every good thing that you'll ever get it makes it hard to enjoy them and if you see every possible horrible thing that happens to you, it makes the other stuff easier to swallow), some worse, and that can be a weaker part of the show.
But it's core arcs are what make the show it's most intresting. For the first season and a half we have the shows best: Jakes battles with the huntsclan, the foot clan.. if they were violent racists who slaughter magical creatures. Granted we don't SEE that on screen but the show does a good job showing us that no, that's what they are.
This itself would likely work.. but what makes it special and standout for the time it came out.. is the wrinkle they throw in: Huntsgirl, the Huntsclan's #1 guy and sidekick to the huntsman.. is Jake's crush Rose, a fairly well adjusted kind girl who simply dosen't know what she's been indoctrinated into, thinking Dragons are evil. This is a nice change of pace as at the time most relationships with teens and tweens in cartoons were either between some popular slab of cardboard of the characters best friend.
Instead Rose SEEMS to be the cardboard type.. but not only has depth outside of the hood, but the fact the audience can easily tell who huntsgirl is, Mae Whitman has a distinctive voice after all and as usual does a fantastic job only adds the tension: We know who rose is, but Jake doesn't and early on we don't know how much of her is real. And once the secret breaks we get the drama of both dealing with not only being on opposite sides but Rose realizing she was on the wrong one.
The arc after, focusing on a dark dragon isn't as strong in comparison, but it's also not entirely fair given they likely though they'd have another season and a half to wrap it up proper. That being said the series also has an interesting arc with Jake's overachieving younger sister, who goes from knowing about the dragon thing (his whole family does minus his dad for.. some reason) and showing some powers.. to being a dragon herself and often her brother's sidekick.
The show had it's weaknsesses, outside of the big bads there was never really much of an interesting Rogue's Gallery, Trixie felt a bit flat as a character, and again there was no good reason Jake's dad shouldn't know so we got stupid groundings and such. But we also got a compelling enemies to lovers arc with a lot of tension, a nice mythology, and profressor rotwood, Jakes teacher and magic hunter, a fun butt monkey for the show. It's a solid show that i'd love to see get a revivial.
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9. Wonder Over Yonder Created by Craig McCracken 2013-2016 43 Episodes
Wonder Over Yonder is one of Disney's more infamous cancelations. Despite being DisneyXD's #1 show they not only barely promoted it, I wasn't aware the second season was going on till it was almost over and still need to get around to watching it, Disney cancelled it. Despite being well loved Disney cancelled it. It's not the worst cancellation on this list, that comes later, but it's still a pretty dang bad one. The fact they didn't put the show on Disney+ for some time dosen't exactly help.
Why Disney hated this show so much I'll never know as Wonder is one of the most heartfelt and creative show's disney put out. And keep in mind as I said i've only seen season 1. I know it gets even better with season 2's dedicated story arc and the introdcution of lord dominator. I've seen the musical number.
Wonder took inspiration from, of all things, dr. seuss, with Craig being an admitted fan of 60's and 70's astetics already, it just flowed naturally as we got the tail of a gentle tumbleweed whose kind and thoughtful to everyone he meets wether they desreve it or not and his tough as nails steed and best friend sylvia. The rolls are easily the best of Jack McBrayer and April Winchel's long careers, nicely contrasting each other in perfect ballance: Sylvia fights the battles wonder can't win with kindness or is too oblvious to realize he's in, Wonder wins fights simply by being too cheery and oblivious to beat.
Over their journey's they repeadtely run into our other main characters, Lord Hater, played by the awesome Keith Fergeuson, an over the top skeletial manchild who badly wants to be taken seriously but is too impulsive, stupid, and easily angered for him to actually achieve that depsite the help of Commander Peepers, his #2 and put upon lackey. Add in tons of great sets, fun scnearios and creative uses of animatoin and you have something unforgitable. McCracken really loves to play with storytelling here, from your standard genre breaks to simply taking a conventional tale like a kinight rescuing a princess.. and turn it into our heroes accidently assitating a stalking jerk and said princess easily clocking him one before they can all unite to save him. The show had so much fun with it's cast and heart in it it's really hard not to like and while it sadly ended too soon what we got... is something magical.
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8. Clerks the Animated Series Created by Kevin Smith 2000 6 Episodes Like most of you are as you read this entry, I was suprised to find Disney TVA made this. To date this is Disney's only adult animated series, and the fox acquisition giving them a full studio for that tells me it'll likely stay this way unless they do something actiony for disney +. It's also far and away the shortest lived show on this list. only airing two of it's 6 produced episodes, neither of which was the actual first episode. ABC didn't like what they got, they buried it, standard corprate procedure, and thanks to DVD and Comedy Central airings the show went from quickly forgotten weird relic to one of the best animated adaptations out there and one of the poster children for shows too good to last.
I grew up with this show. Since I was too young for the kevin smith movies my brother was obessed with, the series was the first Kevin Smith related thing I ever watched and it's stayed with me since. The show's short.. but it's 6 episodes are absolutely STUFFED with great jokes. I could honestly spend the rest of the article quoting this series, from "Hey, it's ted danson" to "Why are we walking like this" to "The weed of crime bears bitter fruit you old hag!".... and that's just the second episode. Admitely in terms of tone, Clerks TAS.. is nothing like the movie. The original Clerks was a fairly low key film mostly driven by our leads Dante and Randall's conversation and the various people who came in. It was a character piece about being stuck in a dead end job, about ignoring rules versus blindly following them, and about two stoners who were in it for 5 minutes but became the backbone of this cinematic universe because their the best.
Clerks the Animated Series instead is a gleefully wacky romp where our heroes can't say fuck but do get into sitcommy hyjinks, from clipshows, to a rival buisness across the way, to the deadly motava virus, to a pastiche of the last starfighter turning into a pastiche of the bad news bears then a pastiche of temple of doom. As you can tell this show is kinda nuts and really just Kevin Smith getting to be all kinds of redicluous in the funniest way possible. He replaced being able to say fuck and talk about sex with hyjinks and turned randall from a charming if assholish slacker into one of the best dumbasses in animation. The show is a near constant laugh riot, beautifully animated too. It also naturally has the boys, with Jay and Silent bob still getting in lots of neat antics even if they can no longer deal on screen. Clerks the Animated series is one of the funniest shows there's ever been and I highly recommend seeking it out.
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7. Milo Murphy's Law Created by Dan Povemire and Jeff "Swampy" Marsh 2016-2017, 2019 46 Episodes
Meet the show disney somehow treated WORSE than the last two. I swear when I put this list together I did not realize these three would be clustered together.
But yes, when I said there was a worse cancelation I meant it: Milo Murphy's Law was the dwampy duo of Phineas and Ferb.. and got utterly buried because Disney was mad it wasn't the mega hit that show was, forgetting that was also a fairly slow burn, or that you kow THIS IS A DIFFRENT SHOW. So they not only barely promoted the second half of season 1.. but then just sat on season 2 for a full year, with many an episode airing elsewhere long before that and released it over a few weeks. They then just.. straight up ended production to make a phineas and ferb movie. In fact despite a full soundtrack apparently existed only ONE song's gotten released from the show in full thanks to said movie's soundtrack. To say Disney screwed this show over is putting it lightly.
And it's a huge shame this show got buried as it did as Milo.. is freaking awesome. I mean I gave it a shot from episode one simply because it had Weird Al attached. Even if i'd gotten burned out on the previous show, i'll give anything Al's in a shot.
And that shot was worth it as from the first episode to the last, Milo is a truly charming show with, say it again ya'll, "a truly unique premise" . Disney has a knack for those don't it?
MML follows Milo Murphy, a happy go lucky 6th grader who meets new kid in town Zack.. who soon finds out Milo has a family curse, based on, of course, Murphy's Law; if something can go wrong, it will. So the universe bends over backwords to try to murder this tween and anyone around him... hence why while everyone likes Milo well enough, only his feisty hustler best friend Melissa really hung around before Zack took a chance on his new pal.
What makes the series great though is that Milo... dosen't ever angst about having murphy's law. You'd think with his life being a constant never ending string of disaster dominos, the guy would give up or we'd have one episode of him bedguging all he's missed out on. Instead.. Milo sees his life as an adventure, enjoys in the shenanigans he gets into and simply packs his backpack to be prepeared and keep his spleen in tact. He's a sweet, kind, optimist who helps people no matter what and dosen't let his curse get him down or stop him from living his life. It's milo that makes the show this good, having to both work around his jinx as well as many an adventure coming from people's reaction to him: From his love intrest Amanda intitally avoiding him due to being a perfectionist only to let him in more once she realizes what a kind guy he is, to the local security guard played byc hristan slater being an absolute dick to him, we see how it impacts his life.. but how he also enjoys his life regardless.
The series also has it's own perry equilvent, Dakota and Cavendish, who genuinely drive the seasons story arcs, two time policeman and ambigously gay duo who try to prevent pistachos from being destroyed.. then do the opposite once i'ts clear it'll cause the end of the world. They add to the story.
What puts this show up here, and way above phineas is that it's not afraid of change: the basic status who dosen't, but the show has a story arc for each season, characters grow and change with Zack getting more used to the chaos around his bestie, the relationship with amanda I mentioned, and most importantly Dakota and Cavindish finding out about milo fairly early on and vice versa, allowing their plots to intersect. It's also really damn funny.
Honestly the show's only this low because the top 6 are REALLY that good.. and because season 2 kinda crams Dr. Doofinschrmitz in there on what feels heavily like an executive mandate. Sometims he cab be a bit overbearing.. but the show's still up this high because frankly, Doof was the best part of his previous show and still gets a LOT of great material, paticuarlly this bit.
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Also his friend there is Jeff. Jeff is a man who lives underground. He's great. And this series is, badly underated. I can't wait to see these characters again as it's been directly said that while their tabling it for the first two seasons apperances by characters from the previous two shows aren't off the table for hamster and gretel, they just learned from this one to wait, but while I wait.. what we got.. is still damn magical.
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6. Kim Possible Created by Bob Schooley and Mark McCorkle 2002-2007 4 Seasons, 82 Episodes, 2 Movies, 1 Live Action Reboot Film
Kim Possible was one of my faviorite shows as a kid, and for good reason. Even over two decades later, the show still holds up as a smart, hilarious, and well done spy show. I also will gladly count it as part of the teen superhero boom as it hits a lot of those tropes too.
The setup however is nicely unique: Rather than work for a big spy orginzation (Though she does freelance in a few episodes for SHIELD expy Global Justice), or for money or what you'd expect from a world class adventuerer and super spy, Kim is just an above average teen whose fairly smart, popular and really damn good at both gymnastics and kicking people who does the job because it's the right thing to do and her organization is really just four people: herself, Wade, a child progidey who finds jobs for her, Ron, her best friend, eventual love interest, and overly panicky but loveable goofus, and Ron's pet Rufus who counts because he saves their lives quite a bit simply by being in ron's pocket and being smart enough. He's also a naked mole rat and the reason I know those exist.
While the show has a strong supporting cast with screen legends Gary Gole and Jean Smart as Kim's Rocket Science and Neurosurgeon parents, her annoying twin brothers, her sarcastic best girl friend monique, her annoying rival bonnie and my personal faviorite her authorative yet still resonable and utterly hilarious teacher Mr. Barkin, played by my boy Patrick Warburton, one of it's biggest strengths is Kim's Rogue's gallery.
Like I said with americna dragon a lot of the weakness for these teen hero shows is that they genuinely only have one or two major foes that are actually you know.. memorable. In contrast Kim has a LOT of intresting and fun villians of the week, not a huge pool but enough to keep it intresting with plenty of fun one offs. The main one is Dr. Drakken, played by John Dimaggio in one of his best parts and Shego, played by Nicolle Sulivan in her best role, an over the top , hammy shortsighted blue mad scientest and his snarky assitant who does most of the punching and is easily kim's physical equal. The two show up the most out of Kim's rogues, and while this on paper could get reptitive the two's banter is great, they play off our heroes fantastically, and they frankly never seemed to run out of great schemes for Dr. D to do.
There were other greats too, my personal faviorites being Senior Senior Senior and Senior Senior Junior, character actor Ricardo Montalban in his best role as a rich old man who after accidently blacking out paris, takes ron's suggestion he had all the makings of a super villian to heart and using his vast wealth to arch our heroes for fun while Junior.. badly dosen't want any part of this. Ther'es tons more I could gush about from DNAmy to the bebes, to my boy Frugal Lucre, a guy who works at a wallmart expy and barely spends money on his arching suplies.
The show's other weapon is it's writing: it's clever, hilarious, and the main duo are incredibly likeable: Kim is incredibly compitent but just as prone to teen angst as anyone her age, while Ron is incredibly panicky and goofy but far more compitent than he seems or he thinks himself to be. Our leads, Kristy Carlson Romano and va god Will Fridle in my faviorite role of his, have an effortless chemstriy between them, even before it turns romantic. You see how valuable their friendship is and how much they need each other even when they bicker.. and it turning romantic just feels.. natural. There's a risk there, and i'll likely go more into tha twhen I eventually cover so the drama (Either later this year if I can squeeze it in or early next year), but needless to say their the gold standard for friends to lovers and I love them.
The show is just.. damn good and worth checking out if you haven't. It's on Disney+ , all of it including the reboot film which is.. alright. not as good as the series but thanks to great casting and the creators involvment , still solid. Call it, beep it, reach it, it's a masterpiece and I badly hope those revivial rumors are true as i'd love to see this cast as adults.
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5. Amphibia Created by Matt Braly 2019-2022 3 Seasons, 58 Episodes
Anoyone whose seem this blog before probably saw this coming. I mean I covered two whole seasons of the show and deeply love it's main cast. And Maddie. God bless my creepy frog daughter. So it being this high up isn't a huge shock.. but damn if it dosen't deserve it. Amphibia isn't perfect: some of the one off episodes, even those important later, aren't the best... but the show still plays one of the best long games in animation. The character arcs are well set up from the get go and we follow our lead Anne Boonchuy from reckless and irresponsible teen plunked into a frog world to a strong empathetic heroine who has to save both worlds from a tyrant and his abusive computer dad. Along the way there's betrayal, slice of life shenanigans, and lots of cleverly done worldbuilding. And some padding. There's just a touch padding. But the strong character arcs not just for Anne but her friends (With Sasha being my easy faviorite but Marcy not exactly far behind and complex and engaging enough to get her own spinoff journal), found family and even her earth family. It's a beautifully done three act story: what seems like a lonnnng time spent in the rural town of Wartwood ends up not only buliding up the show's supporting cast but characters who are vital to the world's salvation later. The second season shows how far anne has come while also building out the world, continuing Sasha's arc as she spirals further and giving us the glory that is marcy, cumilating in season 3, a fantastic season that reverses the premise to amazing effect and ends with a truly satisfying conclusion.. even if SOME of the getting there is messy. Hey it's #5 for a reason.
IT's a well built, hilarious, and heartfelt human into swamp water story, and one of my faviorites. I only don't say TOO much as I want anyon ewho hasn't to try this themselves. Amphibia is a masterpiece and if you haven't seen it it's WELL worth the binge with one of the best voice casts in animation (Something that's really true for everything from far out), really choice world building, and a satsifying ending. This section may of been short but damn if i don't love this show with a lot of my heart.
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4. Gravity Falls Created by Alex Hirsch 2012-2016 2 Seasons, 40 Episodes
Another fairly obvious pick.. but one I weirdly HAVEN'T covered on this blog. I'll really have to fix that next year. Still just because something's obvious dosen't make it any less true. Gravity Falls is easily one of the most influental animated series of the 2010's, right up there with adventure time in kicking off the animation renaissance of that era and several of it's crew, including Matt Braly from the previous entry and a certain someone else coming up, going on to make stellar shows of their own.
It's rep and influence is well earned: Gravity Falls, like, as i've realized writing this, EVERY show on this list has a very simple elvator pitch: two kids spending the summer with their weird elderly uncle at his toursist trap get into paranormal shenanigans: Dipper as he tries to unwrap the mysteries of their temproary home and Mable as she tries to make friends, find a boy to smooch and genuinely ambles through life. She also gets a pig.
The simple setup belies not only a fairly intriguing mystery with a truly amazing twist halfway through season 2, but a fun arc villian in LIttle Gideon, the con artist next door, town hero and phony psychic, but a one of a kind, memorable and all time great vilian in Bill Cipher, a little triangle man who also happens to be a mad nightmare god trying to get into our dimension whose Chucky levels of deeply disturbing and terrifying as he is incredibly funny and charastmatic.
The rest of the cast is no slouch: Dipper and Mable are incredibly likeable, Wendy is great, played by personal faviorite of mine Linda Cardenlli and criminally underused and Soos, voiced by Hirsch along with Stan, Bill and MANY other characters, is a loveable dum dum 20 something who treats our heroes like surrogate siblings.
The real star of course, and the show stealling heart of the show is Stan Pines, the kids corrupt uncle and one of the most hilarious, and once we learn his deal heartbreaking and suprisingly complex, characters in all of animation. This show is on this list on it's own merits but woudln't nearly be so high without stan, a constant laugh machine, quote factory and powerhouse performance by Hirsch, who despite being new to voice acting steps into it like he's done this for decades. From teaching a bear to drive, to wondering if it's wrong to punch a child to "yes yes burn the child" and of course his greatest folly
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Stan constantly boosts the show by existing. Add in strong character ties, a compelling mystery and, like most shows this high up a hell of a finale, and you have a true classic that understadnably changed animation forever.
Also i'm pretty sure Stan killed at least two people in that clip. No one ever talks about that. I mean I knew he had a body count but still.
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3. Recess Created by Paul Germaine and Joe Ansolabehere 1997-2001 4 Seasons, 65 Episodes, 4 Movies
Recess is the oldest work on this list, ending just before KP and American Dragon started (though it'd air long into their runs as this show ran forever and rightfully so). It was also part of my childhood, airing long after it finished and being tender the whole way through.
Recess is a masterwork: while many a show stuck with me from childhood this is one that thinking back I can remember the episodes vividly, and given my memory is spotty that says something. It's a show with a lot of style, having it's characters dressed out of the 50s and 60s, with a cold war subtext I never had, but keeping it in the present to relate to kids when it's airing. It creates a vibe tha'ts both of it's time (the monstickers ep is very much of the pokemon boom), and timeless (kids STILL collect pokemon cards and despite some morons best efforts have recess and still form little clicks).
It takes two simple things kids grapple with, unfair teachers and authority figures and cliques and social circles and simply blows it up to be as big as it was in our heads: I remember having epic duels with the kids I played with , wars, whole conflicts and recess meets things on that level: the world of recess is one where the playground has a lineage of kings, the kindergartners are a feral tribe, two kids can reguarly acess shovels, and the local snitch is some sort of combination of gollumn and a weasel while keeping it just grounded enough for adults to relate to. Where rebelling against authority involves elaborate heists.
It's a perfect kind of show for kids: it meets them on their level, as it did when I was a kid.. but is smart enough that as an adult you can still enjoy it. It helps that most of the cast is three dimensional:
TJ is a loveable scamp.. but a good chunk of his schemes aren't just to stick it to the man or get some reward for him and his running crew, but to help kids. TJ's just as likely to break out of detention as he is to help a kid this week simply because they need it. He'll even help Randall, the local snitch I mentioned, despite his better judgment, simply because it's the right thing to do. He'll have to be talked into it because.. it's Randall. Randall sucks, But he'll do it. Spinelli is the tomboy of the group and will fight everyone, but has a good side to her and struggles with being a girl when she relates more to being masculine, something that's only become more relevant with time and can be read a lot of ways. Mikey is the big kid.. but a soft kind giant who deals with being sterotyped for his side. Vince is the sports kid... and okay most of his plots are around that, but we do get neat bits like him being ashamed his brother is basically urkel and having to learn his brother still slaps because unlike Urkel he dosen't harass women. Gretchen is a massive nerd, and the first role in Ashely Johnson's long and storied career, but also gladly paticipates in the schemes, has a lot of heart, and struggles.
And finally we have my boy Gus, the new kid at the start and the one I related most to being a nerdy nervous wreck myself: but he's gladly accepted into the rest of the gang, and finds a home at long last after moving around his whole life. He's got layers to him: he's a military brat, he's never really had stablility int erms of friendship, and he's often put upon, having to deal with King Bob being a jerk to him for being the new kid or bullies. Yet he's got a good heart despite being the nervous one of the group the biggest heart of them and will gladly stand up for himself when the chips are down.
Not only are these 6 fleshed out and relatable.. but they have a wholesome friendship. They'll fight sometimes, kids do, but despite being vastly diffrent people who on paper shoudln't really be hanging together.. you never doubt they like each other or would drop everything to help one another. Mostly because a good chunk of episodes are just that. Gretchen and Gus are never picked on by their friends.. teased a little, maybe , Spenelli be like that, but these six kids love and respect each other on level that's just heartwarming. You never doubt for a second these six are friends, even with Gus not having their shared history. He just fits because they like him, he's willing to do what's right, and he's a good kid. TJ is brave and noble, Spnelli is tough but dosen't punch down, Vince is cool, Mikey is insightful and kind, Gretchen is smart and clever and Gus ahs a good heart. You see the good they see in each other and it shows our diffrences.. make us better. There may be cliques at recess, but when the chips are down, TJ can get them to work together.
The series also just had a knack for creating really memorable episodes that feel entirely relatable: a trading card style boom leads to TJ becoming a rags to riches tycoon, swinger girl who always swings trying to do what all kids did and reach the other side leads to a tale about things we can't explain when she seemingly dissapears, a simple punishment leads to TJ"s teacher psychologically torturing him, a fake swear word leads to an ENTIRE COURT CASE, all stuff that's somehow realistic. The show's premise was a tool box that allowed them to tell a ton of diffrent stories, a lot of which with really adult, meaningful lessons, and the show never really got old. It only ended because Disney's attempts to continue it simply didn't work out and even with the 5th grade eps as an epilogue, it has a hell o a finale in the movie. The whole run's on disney+ and I.. really need to revisit it.. and to review it next year if possible.
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2. The Owl House Created by Dana Terrace 2020-2023 3 Seasons, 43 Episodes
Let's face it even if the article image hadn't tipped my hat here.. this one being high up .. was a given. I've gushed about this show at length, covering it as season's 2 and 3 ran out, written fanfiction on this blog, and since I started doing them the show's always ranked decently on my 20 best animated episodes lists I do each year, and will likely have a spot this year for the finale. My love of this show is something I don't remotely hide and have no reason to. So it being #2 on this list is an obvious pick.. but one i'm happy to be obvious with. In fact with these last two their pretty nearly tied in my heart and it was one inching out the other.
And the weird thing is.. I didn't even watch all of season 1. I watched the first half much as I could, but while I liked it I didn't get really heavy into it. The characters were charming, the designs great and it was nice to have a show where Wendy Malick was not only voice acting, but had a MAJOR role that really let her show off her chops. I've always loved her and it was a lot of fun to get a roll this good. It was also nice to have Alex Hirsch back. The show wasn't without style, a compelling lead, a hell of a romantic arc or other attractions.. but it wasn't till later in season 1 when classicsl ike encahnting grom fright and the finale REALLY made the show into what it became.
This lead to season 2.. which is one of the best seasons of television i've ever seen, and tha'ts with the fact that halfway through they had to massively reorganize the plot to fit into 10 episodes and 3 specials, something that's only really noticable in hindsight. And i'm not hyperbolizing: the show was good before.. but season 2 enriches everything, giving the characters more depth, paticuarlly king who goes from an afterthought in season 1 to the emotoinal core of the season and Alex Hirsch's best roll... which given Stan above says a LOT. Season 2 takes the foundations of the show and really plays with them, with pretty much everyone getting a deeper character, the school stuff forced into season 1 downplayed into just showing up as needed, allowing for way more story freedom and belos increased presence and hell of a true self reveal giving us one of Disney's greatest villians. Add in hunter as a new main cast member and best good soft boy, and you have a riviting saga that kept me enthralled the whole season. Even the weaker episodes add something, and the result is something that can't be topped: a show tha'ts funny, heartfelt, unmistakably queer and unquestionably well crafted.
It also managed to pull off one hell of an ending, not only introducing my murder child who learns his lesson the collector, but doing so with only three specials to wrap up what they shoul'dve had a season to. It's a show that like Gravity Falls before it is bound to really shake up animation and influence many a show to come an dI can't wait to see the results. A true epic about finding yourself, religious indoctrination and eldrich owl and tube shaped parasites, this show is something that may never be topped and was an utter joy while it lasted. Hoot.
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1. Ducktales Based on DuckTales by Jim Magon /Uncle Scrooge by Carl Barks Developed by Matt Youngberg and Francisco Angones 2017-2021 3 Seasons, 69 Episodes Like #2... #1 is a show my love of has been transparently obvious: Covering season 3 started this blog, i've covered seasons 1 and 2's story arcs, and done a ton of other duck stuff from a full three cabs retrospective, to donald shorts to the very duck adjacent goofy movie. While I haven't done as much duck content this year, a shame really, and still need to finish my life and times retrospective some day... my love of Disney's Ducks has been something i've had since college and this series not only revitalized it but sent it into the fucking stratosphere with the gold standard for reboots. DuckTales is the only show here based on an existing IP, but still manages to be super creative with it. Matt and Frank took nearly 100 years of Duck stories (not hyperbole, Donald turns the big 1-0-0 himself next year), taking from the legendary barks comics, the worthy successor rosa comics, the giant pile of European duck comics, the shorts, the movies, anything Donald , Scrooge or the Boys had been in, every bit of the disney afternoon, and everything else they could shove in to creat the defintive duck universe: Something that fully and lovingly respects what cames before but uses it all to create something fresh and wholly it's own. The cast is a nice mix of reinventions of old characters and brand new ones just as good if not even better.
This can be seen well with the core cast: Scrooge only gets changed slightly, but those slight changes were BADLY needed: Scrooge is still a guy with flaws: he can get far too focused on the goal ahead and not the human cost, is egotstical as all hell, and disconected from the common person. He can raid a tomb better than anyone, sorry Indy and Lara, but god help him if he tries doing an interview or produce a film. It's a nice ballance: he's out of touch and crotchety as usual, but far less of an abusive asshole. It's also clear that while the bin stores a lot of his treasures, and he won't take one if it's owners need it, being more than happy to give Djinn his family's lamp for instance, with it only being a whole thing because Louie sold it. It paints him more as a historian than a theif and robber baron, while still keeping the nice flaws that make him who he is: he's still cheap, he just won't underpay his staff and in fact mostly recurits people other employers give up on for being too weird.
The rest of the cast is given a more extensive but needed overhall: My boy Donald is less of the likeably selfish ass he usually is, instead a loveable dad who still destroys everything he touches, but spends the first two seasons living entirely for his kids. He's more mature while still being the idiot we love.
Everyone else.. is a huge change as I said. The biggest and best.. is the boys. Usually Huey, Dewey or Louie are a hive mind of goody goods.. or obnoxious boys. Depends on what the story needs. It always annoyed me that when you have three characters there their not at all distinct and there's no real need for them. Thankfully the creators of this show understood that and thus evolved the boys into three seperate people: Huey is more like the barks comics versions, a junior woodchuck, close to his mom and uncles, and exitable.. but with a nice fine pace of neurodivergence and anxiety that not only makes him relatable to me but a fairly likeable kid: one scared of change but with all the potetial in the world. Dewey takes ab it after the more sterotypically 80s moments of the boys in the show, being a rad dude with a penchant for acting out.. but instead of a sexist bully or jerk like the boys could be, Dewey is a pure theater kid who badly wants attention and has no impulse control. He's basically Hank Venture , age 12 and i'm here for it. Finally Louie takes the boys more scheming moments from the comics and shows and boils it down into a gen z slacker who wants to work smater not harder, and not work at all if needed, who evolves from heartless lazy schemer and evil triplet to a keep observer whose just mildly shady.
While the barks 5 are all acounted for we also get nice overhauls for the ducktales three original core characters: Webby gets the best, going from just "small baby child babY" to a hyperactive girl who is easily near scrooge's level in adventureeing.. but has no idea how to socalize and still loves sparkles. She's empathetic, brave, and a contrast to what woudl turn out to be her old man: instead of growing to shut people out , she starts out badly wanting to let everyone end. Beakley likewise gets a glow up from "old lady stertotype whose constantly flustered" to "badass british former secret agent, only sane man and gender swapped brock sampson" , with Launchpad being made a loveable doofus, but still compitent since Donald's here to be the everyman.
The cast.. only gets better as it goes: Ducktales took a huge leap and decided "Hey what ABOUT the triplet's mom" turning della from a question mark that was answered all of once across nearly a century.. to a character just as vallad as her brother and uncle who have said near century on her: Della is Donald's opposite: brave, confident.. but a mess herself and stuck on the moon for half the series. Paget Brewster does a phenominal job.
I emphasise the series characters.. because tha'ts it's heart: it has solid plots, revamps and what not.. but it's a giant, instnatly loveable cast of characters: The side cast is MASSIVE pulling from all over duck history: Fehtry makes his debut, Gladstone is taken from easily one of my most hated characters in the comics to a far more loveable schister, Rockerduck finally debuts, Glomgold is turned from "Scrooge but evil" to someone badly trying to copy scrooge and the most glorious weirdo in all of fiction. Seriously Keith Fergusons glomgold is fucking majestic, and while he's never really a major threat his overinfalted ego, lack of planning, obessions with sharks and bombs and general haminess made him one of the best parts of this. You also get Magica as a genuine threat , and a mess later, Scooge's parents having a more active roll, Fenton having more of his own personality and weird swing for the fences complete and utter makeovers like Doofus Drake going from doofy kid to a very weird child who needs therapy, Donald's neighbor nemisis being his therapist or taking the zombie from voodoo hoodo, one of th emost racist and questionable things in duck comics history.. and instead making him into an unstopable juggernaut frankenstein curse ont he rich.
And of course the original cast.. is impecable. My adopted Daugther Lena is the clear standout, having covered her whole story arc on here and loving the character a lot, A cool teen TM who ends up being a traumtized girl badly needing a home, her stoic and neurodivergent sister violet, the egon to her venkman, fuckboy Mark Beaks, great final boss Bradford, gay icon Storkules, gay icon Selene, everyone's least faviorite dick Zeus.. I really coudl go on for some time and easily could but this article has taken a while. The show just had a knack for memorable loveable characters and making this world feel truly alive and humungous and scope, with gorgeous art designs.
It also had a great throughline, with Scrooge going from a man who pushed everything a way.. to the man who truly has everything, everyone growing along the way, and a finale that while a bit messy and leaving us hungering for more, really got to the hart of the show: a family that comes together after being torn apart and adds a LOT to them. It's a show unlike any other, and was truly the dream of a life time.. and I coudln't put anything else at #1. Thanks for reading.
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yukidragon · 1 year
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Okay, I know this is very intrusive and out of nowhere but I really want to do this, my friend is a HUGE fan of yours and admires you a lot.
She's read every post you've done and you've inspired her to create her own story about Sunny Day Jack, so these past few weeks she's been creating a story she wants to share with the community ( We're both 19) and she wants to share it with you so you can give it the go-ahead; but she is afraid of what you will say about her story, so she asks me to ask you...
Story Context: It's about Jack and MC's son, how his life unfolds having a ghost father and being a human/ghost hybrid; in one of the chapters the family goes to visit MC's parents for Christmas, to spend family time, while they travel they make a stop to eat and stretch, in the dining room while MC and Jackie (yes, that's his name, my friend has just to say the name but we don't know if anyone else thought of it) they enjoy their food they hear someone come in, they see how a crowd forms but they don't care, Jackie recognizes a voice and asks her dad if he can go to see, Jack is wary but gives the go-ahead causing Jackie to run off to see the person causing such a ruckus, MC finishes eating and leaves the money on the table to leave but before he even goes for Jackie he recognizes a voice, " MC?" She turns and sees Ian standing right in front of her, "Ian?"
The tension is in the air, so Jackie thanks Ian for his attention, he walks over to her mom and the family leaves. Before getting into the car they see how a crowd continues to accumulate in the restaurant, MC just sighs and heads to the car to leave, before even getting in someone grabs her by the shoulders, turns her around and kisses her passionately, MC pushes him and see Ian..."Did you miss me love?" "Has it been a long time since I last saw you?" "I have never forgotten you love"
MC suffers from a shock, his face has an expression of panic but the moment is interrupted by Jackie who says: "Mom?"
Ian sees him and realizes that the boy he spoke to in the restaurant was nothing more and nothing less than MC's son, a son he knew nothing about, a son that wasn't his
Well and that's it, my friend asks if she could do a brief essay on what the interaction between Ian, MC (Jack) and Jackie, a mini FanFic guy, would be like, if it's not too much trouble.
We send you a greeting and a BIG hug dear ✨
You have no idea how flustered I got reading this. I’m so honored that your friend thinks of me that way. Thank you for sharing that with me, and her story. Your hug and greeting are both very appreciated. 💖
I think the story ideas is lovely and sweet. Your friend doesn’t need the go-ahead from me to get started though. Sunny Day Jack is the work of Sauce/JambeeBot and SnaccPop Studios. I’m just a huge fan who loves the story so much I just want to keep playing with it. I think she should have fun with this idea and go for it!
For a moment, I got confused by the part where you said, “if she could do a brief essay,” since I thought you were talking about your friend. If that was the case, then I would say she certainly doesn’t need the go-ahead from me to write an essay about the game’s characters and play with “what if” scenarios. Then I realized that you probably meant you wanted my thoughts, but please do correct me if I’m wrong!
It certainly sounds like an uncomfortable moment for MC to be sure. How the characters would react is a bit tricky, especially since I’m just a fan making educated guesses, but I can give a few of my thoughts about the scenario you presented.
Given Jackie is old enough to walk and talk and this is the first time Ian is aware of her existence, Ian would’ve been out of MC’s life for a long period of time. It would be very rude, to say the least, if he suddenly came out of nowhere to visit the ex he cheated on and kissed them while calling him his love. Either he would have had to have gotten some really bad advice about how to get back together with an ex he’s lost touch with, or seeing them after so long flicked a yandere switch that made him totally ignore their boundaries, feelings, and comfort under a fog of obsession and nostalgia.
Jack isn’t going to just stand idly by when anyone suddenly comes up to his sunshine and kisses them while trying to act lovey dovey. He’s going to, at the very least, talk MC into leaving and about how what Ian did is not okay.
Then there’s also what Jack will do to Ian later, when his partner and child aren’t around to witness anything ghastly. At the very least, he’ll do to Ian what he did to Nick.
How MC and Jackie would react would be entirely up to you, which greatly affects the situation. Given that they are shocked, I would imagine next would be anger from MC. I mean... the ex who cheated on them is suddenly calling them “love” and kissing them... while in front of their partner and child no less! Their child isn’t going to understand what’s going on. And then there’s strangers given that this is a public place...
I mean, I would be pretty pissed off at being forcefully kissed like that by someone who stomped all over my heart like nothing ever happened.
Those are about all the thoughts I have about this scenario, but take them with a pinch of salt. This isn’t my story to tell, and I shouldn’t be the one to dictate how your friend writes it. Fandom is for fun and as long as you’re not hurting anyone, you should feel free to do as you like! I hope your friend has fun exploring the idea of Ian sweeping back into MC’s life to cause chaos with them, Jack, and their child.
@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars  
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I’ve Followed you long enough to know you’re about to say something really rude in return, but I am so sorry for the people sending awful messages to you over an opinion on a fictional book. I hate Gale with Katniss so much but most of us Katniss/Peeta shippers would never go out of our way to spread all of this hate. You managed to attract either a bunch of crazy outliers or one even crazier son of b LOL. I hope it stops and you can just enjoy your ship in peace!! Ppl should just block you if they don’t like your content smh
If it's rude to ask why you followed me for so long even when I've made it clear I'm a Gale/Katniss shipper and have no lost love for Peeta/Everlark, then I suppose I'm rude. I couldn't care less about how I am perceived by this fandom, but the idea that I'm rude because I don't tolerate the bullshit this fandom throws at me/my opinions does a lot to show why I don't like it. I do appreciate the sentiment though, and I wish people would be as polite as you! But I have to respectfully disagree on one thing, while I'm sure I've attracted some outliers, I don't think everyone who has sent me hate can be considered an "outlier." I also actually know who some of these people are too. While a lot of everlark/peeta fans are very decent, there a certainly those who aren't, as you can see. In any case, I DO appreciate the sentiment, and all I want is peace and quiet.
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imwritesometimes · 3 years
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really wish interviewers would stop asking actors how they feel about the opinions and headcannons of certain corners of internet fandom......
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Hi, Ary, very inactive ex-mutual(i think???) here. Good to see you thriving! ♥ It's been a while since I've dipped my head into cockles stuff. Could I perchance maybe ask uuuuum tf is going on??? lol I see Mish apparently confirmed he used to stay over at Jensen's in Van, and heard newbs were apparently freaking out about it and getting a bit messy, which I get that, business as usual. But I'm also seeing shit about spin-offs? And Jared getting in a twitter fight with Jensen, causing/resulting in stans to going feral and sending hate?? I know you're not as big a fan of Jar, but that's part of why I figured I'd ask you, you usually have a really level head about this kinda stuff. If you don't wanna answer publically, or at all, that's totally chill!
Hey, Rhi! We're still mutuals! Of course we're still mutuals! When I saw the notification of your ask, I was like "Hey! I haven't seen you in a while!" and my husband was like "???" and I said "Tumblr" and he said "Oh."
It was a wild time haha.
In any case, welcome back to the dumpster fire! We are obviously still a mess. So to catch you up, I guess I will start by summarizing both before and after the finale (not sure where you left off so this might be redundant for you) ... basically, it became obvious as the end of the show neared that Jensen was not on board with the plan for the finale; although Jared never stopped singing its praises.
We got confirmation of this during a zoom interview where Jensen said that he actually went into the writers room as well as called Kripke to basically voice how he didn't agree with the direction the final season was going, but he was shot down on all fronts. In another interview, he was asked "What would you tell your younger self going into this career?" And Jensen responded with: "I would tell myself to just keep your head down and do the work" meaning, "Don't try to change things because you can't." I also think that this whole situation is what he wrote "Let Me Be" about for his first Radio Company album, but that is just my own speculation. All of his reluctance, even though he always followed it up with "But I eventually saw the value in the script" or "I came around in the end" (which never sounded sincere, and I don't think he was really trying to sound sincere) made us all very nervous about what was to come for 15x20; and of course, when the last two episodes aired, we saw just how badly they fucked it up.
After the awful finale, the entire fandom became aware of the CW's heavy handed role in the thing, basically squeezing all the life out of SPN to shape it into a ramp from which Walker could launch itself. They not only erased all the love and joy and representation that Cas's love confession gave us, they also tore apart the things that made sense about the bond between Sam and Dean, making it really just about Sam-- and therefore Jared, which of course, Jared seemed to be fine with ... even though no one else was. Misha barely said anything during the finale, and a few of the other actors talked about the show ending in various posts, but Jared tweeted up a storm ... and Jensen? Jensen just sat in sexy-silent resentment of the whole thing. He didn't tweet, he didn't post, he didn't say a word once he no longer had to, and I think that's because he was already going full-steam-ahead on his plans for redemption.
Which brings us to Chaos Machine-- Jensen and Danneel's new production company that is being run by a queer creative director and has a mantra of inclusivity and representation woven throughout it's fabric; and apparently, the first story that Jensen wanted to tell through this new platform is the origin story of Sam and Dean's parents; so last week (?) he announced the upcoming production of "The Winchesters" -- the untold love story of John and Mary. Obviously, John is not the most likable character from the show, so the idea was met with a lot of resentment when it was first announced, but Jensen has gone on to say that he is excited to take on the task of telling the "true" story behind these characters-- the one that makes sense with the pre-established canon and doesn't reject it. So, given that, the idea is being mulled over with a bit more optimism from the fandom.
Who isn't being optimistic though?
Jared Padalecki.
When Jensen made this announcement on Twitter, many of his friends and coworkers congratulated him, but not Jared. Jared responded with a passive aggressive: "I'm happy for you, man, but I wish I didn't hear about it through Twitter." This of course, sent all the die-hard Jared fans into a tizzy and they immediately began asking him if he was serious (hoping it was just a joke-- we all hoped it was because there would be fallout no matter what one's opinion on Jared is). Instead of leaving it there though or just deleting that tweet, Jared went on to tweet some more, saying that he was being serious that he didn't know about the plans for the prequel, and that he was "gutted" that Sam apparenlty wouldn't be included (mind you, this a prequel to SPN... meaning BEFORE Sam and Dean were even born, so how could Sam be included? But Dean is apparently narrating this story so maybe Jared thought Sam should be helping to narrate it? I don't know). But Jared being Jared couldn't just leave that there, he then went on to tweet at Robbie Thompson who was announced as a writer for "The Winchesters" so then Jared went off on him too, calling him "Brutus" and a "coward" acting like Robbie betrayed him (speculation is-- Robbie refused to write for Walker, so Jared is pissed that he essentially chose Jensen over him). He did fairly quickly, remove that tweet attacking Robbie, but of course the damage was done at that point. And it truly only took his first tweet calling out Jensen for some people to be like "Jared-- that sucks if you didn't know but why are you saying any of this publicly?"
As you might know, Jared has had issues in the past with posting hurtful things on social media, and has even used it as a tool for attack before-- calling out customer service agents and public workers that he felt have wronged him, which is bad enough ... but for him to then do the same thing to his best friend of well over a decade? Many people who had once liked him or at least gave him the benefit of the doubt (I used to ...) stopped after this latest twitter tantrum.
However, some people have suspected for some time that J2 had a falling out either shortly before the finale or just after. Their public/social media interactions have seemed awkward, stilted or even non-existent in moments that they normally wouldn't be. In the past year, when Walker premiered, Jensen didn't say much about his friend's new venture other than a "Congrats. buddy" here and there. Later, we learned that Jensen refused to work on the show ... Jared said he make him do it, drag Jensen to the set "kicking and screaming" which made many fans quirk up an eyebrow because, why would Jensen put up a fight unless the two weren't as close as they used to be? And then Jensen moved his family to Colorado (either permanently or for an extended period at least) which is notable considering how he moved to Texas seemingly to be closer to Jared, even buying a house that was near his. All this was just speculation though; but it wasn't until Jared's tweet complaining about not knowing about the prequel that the theories behind them falling out, became less theory and more fact.
The day after his twitter tantrum, Jared tweeted again-- not retracting his statements or apologizing, but instead saying that he and Jensen "talked" and were "all good". Jensen then tweeted too, parroting this statement to some degree, which only made the whole thing even more sour in the mouths of the fans. The fact that Jared didn't apologize for his outburst and throwing his friend under the bus, and also the fact that Jensen-- Mr. Sexy Silence, Mr. Never Tweets, Mr. Tech-Ignorant-and-Proud, actually had to POST SOMETHING saying that he and Jared made up, it just screamed OPTICS. It was obviously the work of agents and PR firms and lots of people going "Look, if you two keep beefing, that will mean the death of both of your projects. Even more people will stop watching Walker, and this SPN prequel will never get picked up due to the scandal." So, the two "made nice" publicly to quell the chaos, but in my opinion, it's all too little too late. Jared started a storm that he can't contain now with a little tweet, and it seems like he knows that too because before he talked about him and Jensen making up, he asked that people "not send threats". He could have just as easily said that he shouldn't have made this a public issue and that he's sorry, but instead, he continued to play the victim and stoke the flames by alerting us all to the damage he's done.
Now, like I said before-- I used to give him the benefit of the doubt. I don't think he's an awful human or that he deserves to be attacked or anything, but he is an adult man with very poor judgment and an obvious selfish-streak a mile wide. He should know better, and he should have more respect for his so-called "friends" and "brothers" than to make them targets to public ridicule. I have a hard time believing that Jensen still sees Jared the way he used to, and I wouldn't blame him a bit for wanting to pull away-- especially when he's moving on to so many new and exciting things. Jared certainly deserves happiness just as much as anyone else, but he went on twitter and basically asked for a scandal, and he got one.
The question is now-- was there a motive behind it? Was just looking for a reason to bring his and Jensen's falling out to light-- while making himself looking like the victim in the process? Or did he genuinely not know about the prequel and just decided to go about "not knowing" in the most toxic and hurtful way he could manage?
In any case, that is the drama ... that is the J2 insanity in a rather lengthy nutshell ... that is the tea ... and I hope it all makes sense.
But the good news out of all of this is, Cockles is thriving-- they are happy and in love and Jensen calls Misha "Babe" and Misha misses waking up to see Jensen in the morning, and they are just as cute and wonderful as can be.
So, I will end that there. I am so glad to see you back, and I hope I answered all your questions in a way that made sense ... I tried anyway!
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💖💖💖
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lazarettta · 3 years
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Misthios V
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Pairing (Mother Miranda x Spartan!Reader)
Rating (T)
Word Count (1.9k)
Warning (Language)
You spend your morning with Alcina and her daughters while Miranda deals with Karl and Village business.
By the time the sun had begun to peak over the mountains you'd already made yourself at home on one of the balconies of the castle with a woven basket full of croissants and mason jar full of freshly squeezed orange juice. You'd been snooping in the kitchen looking for a snack when you found the partially hidden side door. It was shielded by produce crates and bags of potatoes—you guessed it was an old service door or something, and it was probably what the help around the castle used to sneak around the castle grounds while their Mistress sleeps.
You certainly did. You took a trip to town on a whim and you were bored. You didn't have anything on you in terms of currency but you weren't one to rely on some currency to get you by as there was always a favor or two to be traded. New era, same tricks and it never failed you once. Most of the village was still asleep when you strolled through but the few farmers you saw tending to their stocks gave you less than friendly looks but you didn't take any offense. You were new and places like this didn't take too kindly to a new face, especially a young new face.
Hell, the woman in the bakery shop by the church wasn't very fond of you either until you revealed that you understood every word that she said. She turned into a different person and suddenly you weren't much of a stranger anymore, by her standards anyway.
By the time you found your way back to castle Dimitrescu, you had bruised knuckles, a basket full of goodies you probably shouldn't be eating and a decent knife now warming the holster in your boot. It wasn't tactical or as balanced as you liked but you felt a hell of a lot better with it than you did a few hours ago without it.
You had no idea who's bedroom you'd invaded to get to the balcony though you didn't really care, you saw a plush chair that was only just covered in ice and the cushions were only just a little wet, shockingly.
And that is exactly how Alcina found you, and she wasn't alone. Trailing behind her bundled up even more than you with the hood pulled up over her blonde head was a young woman with eyes that matched Alcina's. Curious that she didn't get her mother's height though—she was probably around your height, give or take.
“You missed breakfast, dear.”
“Didn't think you'd send a hunting party for me,” you smiled but in truth you hadn't realized how much time had passed since you got back to the castle. Between stuffing your face full of bread you hadn't really had in years and well, yeah, you definitely lost track of time. Thankfully there were still a few pastries left in the basket for you to offer to Alcina and who you assumed to be one of her daughters.
The girl's eyes hadn't left you since she first saw you—you knew when you were being studied but for the moment, you were too tired to actually care but not tired enough to drop your guard with these people.
Alcina waved away your offering as she took a seat in the other chair, obviously as unbothered by it's less than ideal conditions as you were but her daughter graciously scooped up a buttered croissant before leaning against the rail, her back to the gorgeous view behind her. She was probably used to seeing it and you certainly weren't a stranger to such joys either but you never really grew bored of them.
“(Y/n), this is Bela, my eldest daughter. Also my successor should anything ever happen to me.”
“Mother, stop it. Nothing will ever happen to you.” You watched as Bela ducked her head, but she wasn't blushing, she turned to you, pushing the hood back from her face slightly but she didn't say anything.
Alcina pulled her cigar holder from somewhere on her dress she was currently wearing, and pointed down at the basket sitting on the small table between you three, “It's not safe to roam around on these roads at night.”
You shrugged, “I can take care of myself, Lady Dimitrescu. A few wolves don't really scare me.”
“There are far worse things out there than death, (Y/n).”
You scoffed, laughing a bit much to the dismay and surprise of the Lady and her daughter, “I've been around long enough to know how true and wise that statement is, but I'm far too old to be scared by it anymore.”
Bela looked at you curiously, “But you don't look a day over thirty, (Y/n).”
You bit back another laugh, picking at the pastry still sitting on the napkin on your thigh. Well. You weren't going to be getting any answers if you didn't give any yourself. “Who do you think Miranda got her skin care treatment from?”
You looked up when the other two balcony occupants were quiet for too long and you realized that they were both staring at you with equally unreadable but different expressions. Though Alcina's hat always made it impossible for you, or anyone else, to gauge her moods and reactions.
“What?”
“You're being serious?” Bela asked, both of her eyebrows disappearing beneath her loose hair.
“Yeah, seriously. I met Miranda back when she was ruling her first kingdom. She thought I was a fucking Viking for the longest time.” Miranda is going to murder you and find a way to make it permanent.
“You're joking. Mother, the mortal is joking...isn't she?”
“Mortal?” you finished your breakfast and wiped away the crumbs, “I haven't been called mortal for a very long time, but now that we've all established that no one on this balcony is of average stock...”
“We can really talk.” Alcina finished as you trailed off, taking a very long and heavy drag while giving you another once over, slower this time as if she was going to find the answers to whatever she was wanting to know. She glanced at her daughter and sighed when she saw her starting to tremble a bit.
“Bela go inside and get your sisters.” Alcina said softly but her tone still held no room for argument and you could tell that Bela wanted to protest against her mothers wishes, “Have tea prepared and brought to the study.”
“For everyone?”
Alcina smiled a bit, “Yes, dear, for everyone.”
When Bela was around the corner and well out of earshot, Alcina brought her attention back to you. And you looked back, waiting for her to ask or say what was on her mind.
“What era?”
“The Peloponnesian war. I'm the last living Spartan on Earth.”
Miranda neatly folded away the paper the moment she heard the ceremony doors opening. Miranda sighed heavily when she heard Karl’s mouth down the corridor—the man's need to chatter (and argue) never ceased and Miranda was positive she would be leaving this meeting with a migraine. She'd rather be doing something more productive with her time…working on her own research, cracking you like an egg or maybe even trying a new recipe for a change.
It wasn't long before Karl burst through the doors, his prized hammer resting on his shoulders and a cigar between his teeth and in his other hand was a satchel that was holding something it wasn't designed to carry. The grin he wore grew when his eyes landed on her and Miranda sighed inaudibly behind her mask.
“Well,” he purred, sitting on the bench he normally claimed and set his hammer down next to it, “If it isn't the woman of the hour! How kind of you to meet with me today.”
Miranda didn't care too much for his charming tone—his charisma was impressive but Miranda had never been a true fan of it, and Alcina outright hated him forcing Miranda to often play the role of a mediator every time there was a faction meeting which almost always ended in chaos and bloodshed. Thankfully it was only once or twice out of the month unless it was an emergency.
“Your message said that you have something of importance to show me, Lord Heisenberg, get on with it.”
“Oh, someone's testy today,” he mumbled under his breath but just loud enough for her to catch his words and Miranda's jaw clenched, “As requested, one head of a troublesome villager only searching for his beloved little girl. Maybe do your job and tell that supersized bitch to keep her brats on a leash next time.”
The satchel landed on the floor at Miranda's feet. Miranda's eyes narrowed in his direction, barely glancing at the satchel that narrowly missed touching her, and Karl felt the hairs on the back of his neck rise alarmingly fast, “Do not forget your place here, Heisenberg.”
Karl snarled but he quickly conceded—he's proved himself to be the biggest Alpha in the region time and time again but he wasn't stupid enough to think that he could challenge Miranda evenly. Miranda relented, accepting his surrender but she didn't buy it, she never did.
“All I'm sayin' is that we don't hunt in the village for this very reason—”
“I understand that, Heisenberg. And it's been taken care of. Lady Dimitrescu will see that it never happens again.”
Karl grumbled but thankfully he didn't push, this time, “There's something else too that I think you should know. There's a stranger in the village, probably owns that cute little camp my lycans tore apart a few miles outside of town.”
That caught Miranda's interest though she did not let it show—it wouldn't do to have a man like Karl have even the slightest bit of leverage over her. He was still too useful for her to kill.
“A stranger?”
“Yeah,” he smirked, relighting his cigar and taking a long pull, “Tall, real tall and quite a looker too...I'm here to officially claim her. If she's as tough as she looks, I'll—”
Miranda's wings fluttered when those words left his hairy lips, he didn't have to go into detail for her to know who he was talking about and Miranda felt the edges of her claws trying to grow beneath the veil of her dark wings.
“No.”
“No!?” he sat up quickly, setting both of his feet down on the ground, “What do you mean no?! Aren't those your laws for fresh meat?!”
“Yes, and that woman is off limits. Defy my word, it will not end well for you. If that is all Lord Heisenberg, I will see you this Friday at the faction meeting.”
“You gave her to that zombie in the castle didn't you!” he called after her when Miranda transformed into a flock of birds and left through the rafters.
Karl pulled his hammer to him as he jumped to his feet and he destroyed the bench he was previously sitting on but Miranda was already gone by the time the splinters where she had once stood, “I never get anything nice around here! Always scraps this and scraps that ever since that bitch took over!” he turned and threw his hammer, nearly slicing a pillar in half and he was half transformed before he caught himself.
Karl dusted himself off with one hand while the other brought another cigar from an inside pocket of his oil stained coat and picked up his hammer on the way out of the ceremony room, his temper simmering down. He took one last look at the damage he caused, and smirked.
“Have fun cleaning this up, mother. ” He didn't care what she said, the woman in the village he saw this morning was his game.
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sunseteyes · 3 years
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FLUFFVEMBER DAY 10: INOSUKE HASHIBIRA
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prompt: netflix binge (prompts are by @jojosmilktea)
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word count: 1,329 words | themes: gen!reader. inosuke being tough. horror movies but not graphical anyway.
tags: @kacchanori @chickynn @todominica @sparkleswritings @brinthie @patricia-ceballos @giyuus-wife @bitchtrynafck @astrxrism @animatedarchives @deephasoceanmagic @strawberrysalwa (send a dm or ask to be added!)
rv: i just finished the haunting of bly manor by the time i was writing this so yeah it’s what i wrote here but there’s no sort of spoilers anyway.
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✒︎ it’s not a competition
it's a thing for you and the rest of the "kamaboko squad" to always have a gathering at least once or twice a week to watch movies in netflix for one night. it's either going to be at your or tanjiro's house but usually, it's gonna be on the siblings' abode.
however tonight, it's just you and inosuke in your flat. apparently, nezuko is sick and tanjiro is taking care of his sister. and of course when zenitsu has heard of it, he wanted to go to the siblings' home, to which lead to the situation that you are in now. coincidentally, inosuke was looking forward to the weekly netflix binge since you were scheduled to watch the haunting of bly manor that day. inosuke is a huge fan of thriller, horror and crime movies or series, of course he’d be looking forward to such.
as for you, you're not that much afraid of horror stories but you could say that you hate jump scares the most, that's for sure. so yes, inosuke's company could help you, you just hope he wouldn't notice it and tease you to the ends of the earth.
"so what are we gonna watch, (y/n)? it's horror, right? you're not backing down are 'ya?"
you scoffed, "of course not, are you?"
inosuke laughs sarcastically, holding his chest up high. "why should i be?! it's you who's gonna be scared tonight!"
a pout appears on your face as you pressed the play button on the remote control, eventually having the first episode load on the screen. you settled comfortably next to inosuke, instantly feeling the warmth that radiates from his body even if you were only seated beside him, merely inches away. you've never sat beside him before actually, considering that you were much closer to nezuko compared to the other three. inosuke is probably the least closest to you than zenitsu and tanjiro, so this night will probably out of your comfort zone.
still, it is a good sign for the both of you. at least now, you won't get to play favorites. and you're quite sure inosuke's not that much of a difficult person to get close with—you think.
"why are their faces turning like that it looks so weird." inosuke complains the minute the opening started showing on the screen, the array of characters and specific casts in the beginning of the episode. you couldn't help but let out a short chuckle from your chest, unconsciously snuggling further next to inosuke as you brought your legs up to the couch, reaching under the comforts of the blanket that you laid on top of you two—to which he surprisingly agreed on.
inosuke noticed your movements though. the boy flinches on his seat and turns his head to look at you with eyes wide, yet you had yours glued to the television screen, too focused on what was happening in the scene without any clue that inosuke has his attention solely to you.
above everyone, you were the only one who he cannot read at all. to have you and only you here sitting beside him is something that came out of a clear blue sky. it's not that he didn't want to interact with you, he just has no idea how and it frustrates him how much he doesn't know what to say to you most of the time. of course, it’s not like he’ll ever admit to that out loud.
unable to identify why his face was burning up, he automatically looked away, also in fear that you may notice him looking your way and misunderstand it. his gaze may be directed on the screen and the subtitles, but his mind was flying like a bird elsewhere, flapping its wings to the thoughts of you.
as time passes by, inosuke eventually composes himself, his focus now on the television screen as the film and its plot slowly processed in both of your minds. reactions and opinions were shared between you and inosuke like you were pros, used to how you both do this with the others. with how the conversation just falls smoothly like the wave of a water, you certainly felt how natural the talks were and you were liking it.
maybe all too much.
"hey i thought this is horror where are the ghosts?"
"oh calm down, nosuke. we still have eight more episodes, you know? of course they'll have to build the plot first."
"aw man this is so boring i need to see the monsters!" inosuke whines loud like a child but he continued watching, earning you a shake from the head with an amused face. you just know that he was only keeping up a front just to make himself look tough. you're beginning to feel excited of what's to come as you two watch further into the scenes.
and when the dreaded jump scare scenes arrived, you certainly did not expect them. and neither did inosuke.
"what the hell was that?! did you see that?!"
"y-yeah, i did." you tried not to stutter but your voice was too weak to conceal it. it did not left unnoticed by inosuke, immediately recognizing that expression of yours.
"what's that? are you scared?"
your eyes narrowed as you faced him, "i'm not scared! and don't pretend that you're not!" you argued, frowning at the way he was trying to act tough. but at the same time, it was not because you felt irritated by these kind of antics. you were actually having fun by these small banters. it just makes you think of the reason why you hadn't done this before.
"you flinched." you say without looking, the corner of your eyes catching his previous and current reactions.
"s'just cold, that's all!" he spats, making you scoff in almost an instant as he pulls the blanket further to his form.
you never had foreseen for someone like inosuke to be affected with the way you tease them but the more you had gotten reactions from him, the more you were beginning to feel competitive to see until the end of the movie marathon.
but alas, everything has its end and it's all because you fell asleep, as well as the said boy. the morning you woke up, it was like you were greeted with a birthday surprise even if it was not your birthday and you should have expected it because you were the one who insisted to yourself to continue watching despite having your eyes already drooping and begging to be closed.
by the time you opened your eyes, you were greeted by the sight of the living room, with the television still on and the sun peeking through the gaps of the blinds on your windows. you barely had the moment to register the living being beside you because your eyes were already wide when you turn to look at inosuke's still-sleeping form, head rested rather uncomfortably on the backseat of the couch and his lap all open for that's where you previously were.
you were about to look away but you found yourself staring at his face; openly and without any sign of embarrassment and shyness. you do admit that inosuke is beautiful but damn this is probably the time you truly believed in it.
the length and curl of his lashes that could match guys and gals alike, the softness of the look on his face even while sleeping and awake, the hue of his hair complimenting his skin complexion and texture, the way his fringes smoothly decorate his face like it was meant to be there.
damn.
you felt that familiar beating in your heart, almost some sort of drum that beats so uniquely than how it normally would. and for you, you knew what it meant.
it meant that even if it's not a competition, it was clear that you lost.
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gettingjuggiewithit · 3 years
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hi! i saw your post about jabitha and even though i am a bughead fan, i do have to agree with you. i honestly really like jabitha, even though i still prefer bh. i mean, tabitha is amazing, and i really hope she gets more storylines and more interactions in 5b, and if they really decided to give jabitha a real go, i wouldn't be opposed (as long as they didn't make it just as a roadblock for bh and actually explored the relationship).
while i don't think the "bondage" comment was romantic per se, the kiss still happened, the "muse", the teasing from the other eps. and if you ship jabitha, you should be able to enjoy your content and have fun!
like i said, i get what you're saying and i understand how annoying EVERY riverdale fandom can be (there are people in the bh fandom that are really annoying, and i even blocked some of them!). honestly, just block the tag/those people. for example, i don't like barchie, so i blocked the tag. and everything is fine! this way, they enjoy their stuff in their own little bubble and i'll enjoy mine!
people need to understand that the point of being in a fandom is to create content and have fun and that not everyone wants to engage in ship wars/fandom drama.
also, i'm still that other anon. i think everyone is allowed to make their own takes on canon. just as long as you don't say that other takes different than yours are invalid. yes, some of then can be a hot mess, but everyone is allowed to have their own opinions/interpretation, as long as they don't harass/bully/talk trash to other fandoms/people because of it.
there will be people that will demonize jughead, people that will demonize betty, (i myself love both betty and jughead!!), and everyone just needs to find their happy space in the fandom!
okay, end of the rant!
Oh anon. Your message is really sweet and all, and for the most part I agree with you. I’d be super happy to stay in my lane *if* they would stay in theirs. But they don’t and they are apparently incapable of doing so. Determined to start a very one sided ship war because they’re bored and don’t have anything good in canon to take into the hiatus so uh... picking on Jabitha shippers is it I guess?
Anyway, I’ve shipped Bughead for years. In many ways, I still ship them. But I had to block the Bughead tag because people in that fandom made it UNBEARABLE. They refuse to tag their stuff (although recently they’ve adopted the anti-jabitha tag and thank the old gods and the new). They tried to lump Bughead multishippers who were minding their own business in with Barchies of all people. Now mind you, these are people I’ve followed on tumblr for years! Who suddenly started acting a fool because... well, who knows really, but mostly I suspect it’s because Jughead showed genuine romantic interest in someone that wasn’t Betty, and since they can’t control what’s happening in canon, they have to take it out on people who ship Jabitha. Even those of us who also love or have loved Bughead for years, but realize that right now in canon, maybe they’re not the best for each other.
I wish I could show you my block list. I tried to count them recently but I lost track around the 380 mark and tbh, MOST of that is the Riverdale fandom, and it’s a list that grows by the day. And I would never try to tell people they weren’t entitled to their own read of canon on their own blog as long as it’s tagged properly, but the Bughead fandom specifically lately has been hateful to other Bugheads who happen to multiship for literally zero reason. Vagueblogging about Jabitha shipper opinions when those opinions are tagged on our own blogs, just to try and tear us down? Bullying Jabitha content creators whenever we post something tagged on our own blogs by sending hateful anons? Tattling about our tags on stuff to other Bughead blogs just so those blogs can try and tear us down for having our own opinions and prove us wrong? Inventing facts about canon (my favorite lately has been one some other anon sent me today: that Jabitha’s love to troll about Jughead calling Tabitha his muse, and ignore that Jughead had to get high to write. Except that last week we were wrong for being excited about him calling her his muse because he was *joking* and this week it’s that we’re wrong because he had to get high to write... never mind that this is just Bughead shippers conveniently ignoring that he’s been consistently writing right along since he met Tabitha and started working the Mothman case. He’s been excited about it, working on it in the diner, sending pages to his agent... all while not being high. What he DID have to get high for was to tap into his inner Stephen King because that’s not, and has never been Jug’s style, but in order to write more weird for the little showcase he had the opportunity to be a part of, he had to get more weird, you feel me? Anyway, it’s just more grasping at straws on their end, can’t relate.)
And like, to some extent, I get them being upset. They haven’t had a properly romantic scene between them since Betty confessed to cheating, and arguably since Betty cheated period. They’ve watched Betty and Jug share plenty of awkward, stilted screen time. They’ve watched Betty make almost zero effort to connect with him meaningfully, even after he’s opened the door to her twice now, and basically reaffirmed to her twice that whatever she thought he meant in his voicemail is not what he meant. They’ve watched Betty have meaningless sex with Archie, Jughead have meaningless sex with Cora, Betty involve herself in a ...idk, pseudo-relationship? Idk what to call her thing with Glen. They’ve seen that Jug did have an ex-girlfriend (who is toxic) and are currently watching him flirt and dance and kiss and hit on this other woman who is NOT Betty and it’s upsetting them. And that’s fine, they’re allowed to be upset. Canon is giving them absolute Jack and shit right now, and Jack left town along with Jughead’s family (fjkdsfjkd I’m sorry, that was mean, but I hate FP, different rant), but that doesn’t mean they have to be hateful just because some Bugheads are enjoying Jughead have a fun and potentially meaningful dynamic with someone else.
And so we’re clear, if Betty wanted to have one of those too, I wouldn’t care either. I’d actually support her with Glen if I thought for a second Betty *was* enjoying it and Glen wasn’t such a creep. I don’t think Betty needs to be punished by being forever alone or whatever horrible behavior Bughead blogs are ascribing to us this week. And while I am certainly no misogynist, I do think Betty owes Jughead a more specific apology for her cheating than “I’m sorry I didnt tell you sooner” and does need to be honest with him about the sex her and Archie had when she came back to Riverdale. And that’s not me hating on her — the idea that Betty doesn’t owe Jughead anything and that if you disagree with that or any of her behavior this season, you’re a misogynist is... well, I don’t think people who believe that understand what misogyny is. As it is, misogynoir seems painfully lost on them as well.
But truthfully, I want Betty to be happy and I want Jughead to be happy but I don’t think either of them are in a place where they would make each other happy right now. If anything, Betty seems vaguely annoyed and/or indifferent to Jughead’s existence for the most part, and Jughead is very much wrapped up in his mystery and Tabitha at the moment. I can see why Bughead shippers are frustrated by this, but it also is what it is right now. Just roll with it, you know?
And actually, that brings me to a realization. Jughead developing a romantic interest in someone else doesn’t bother us the way that it bothers the bullying Bughead shippers, and I think that’s what bothers them the most. It’s why they automatically assume that by shipping Jabitha, we hate Betty and want her to suffer. It’s why they assume that we think Jughead should be allowed to fuck around, but not Betty. And it’s funny because like.... a lot of them *say* they love Betty and Jughead both, but uh... I don’t think that’s true at all. Or maybe they do love both, and they just love Betty more. And so when it looks like Betty might “lose out” on Jughead (even if only for a little while), and we’re not necessarily upset by that because Jughead is getting to be happy, it pisses off the larger Bughead fandom and makes them think of us as ‘lesser’ shippers. We’re not bothered by canon and they are and so they have to jump through every hoop imaginable to invalidate our canon reads and/or send us anon hate.    
Anyway, in short, I only request that the Bughead fandom stop vague-blogging about Jabitha shippers/multishippers who really are just trying to stay in our corner and ship our stuff. Like, painting us all with a broad brush and equating us all with Barchies and with the toxic quarantined side of the fandom doesn’t actually reflect poorly on *us* — it reflects poorly on Bughead shippers who are so desperate for moral and ship superiority that they have to bully people who more or less stay in their own lane just because we’re not as upset at canon as they are. Like I said in my other post, it’s tragic. 
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adiwriting · 3 years
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FYI thanks for mocking me on discord that was fun to see my heightened emotions of the day mocked by my fav writer. I wasn't planning on saying anything but I figured if it stops you guys taking the piss out of other asks you said you weren't even going to publish in the first place then perhaps I should. Be aware some of us don't have tumblr accounts. This is not the friendly fandom I was led to believe if you enjoy doing that with friends on discord in the public chats. Thanks for educating me
First of all, I’m not even sure how this ask got through except to say that Tumblr is buggy AF and I’m angry about it. Most people that have anon off, have it off for a reason, so that fact that Tumblr can just up and ignore that to let anons through is pretty shitty and @staff should look into that. 
But since this is not the first time that somebody has accused me of trigging them over the entire Tyler Blackburn situation, I’m going to write up a response and hopefully everyone that’s been triggered by me and my words can all read this and perhaps have an ounce of self-awareness and empathy for others. 
12 days ago, I wrote a post about fandom racism that also apparently was the first time most of fandom was learning about the fact that Tyler Blackburn was not an indigenous person. I expected about 10 people to read it and for it to anger about 1-2 people. Those were my expectations. To get an angry anon or two. To have somebody pop into my replies to argue DNA testing. So when the post blew up and I became the subject of fandom rage, with new people vague blogging me by the hour, my DMs and my inbox filled with hate, and this became “the topic” of fandom on multiple platforms... I wasn’t mentally ready for it. 
Despite all of that, I still stand by the spirit of that original post. I still stand by the fact that I posted asking people to stop calling Tyler a POC and using that as a defense of their own racist behavior. I DON’T stand by my argument of using percentages or DNA testing to “prove” Tyler wasn’t NA. I’ve learned better over the last 12 days. I don’t stand by my statement that we shouldn’t cancel Tyler. As a white woman, that isn’t my call and I don’t get to decide how the indigenous fans respond to this hurtful news. But the things I regret revolve around not being a good ally. They don’t revolve around regret posting about Tyler’s actions and they certainly don’t revolve around any regret for calling out fandom racism. 
Back to my response and my “mocking” behavior. 
I want anyone who says that I triggered them (because it’s been a handful of people by now, either directly or through vague blogging about me) to understand something.
Most of us have been in the situation where you post something and you get 1-2 hate anons. You bitch about it, you complain to your friends, then you move on. Few of us have likely ever woken up day after day to 25+ messages calling you an awful person for having the audacity to share news about an actor who shared the news about himself first. It, understandably, gets to you. And yet, I’m not out here blaming those hate anons and DMs for being the reason I couldn’t sleep for a week, the reason I had full blown panic attacks, or the reason I couldn’t eat more than a bite of food each meal. Because at the end of the day, this fandom wasn’t the SOLE reason for my mental health issues and I refuse to blame other people for my own mental health issues. I refuse to say that anyone else “triggered” me, because the fact remains that anyone who triggered me only did so because I gave them the power to do so. Just like I would argue, I don’t have the power to trigger anyone else, you’ve all given me that power and you can take it away. You can unfollow me. You can block me. You can chose not to read my thoughts on things and let it affect your day. I’m not remotely worth anyone’s stress. 
Did I publish anons after I said I wasn’t going to? Yes. Though, I’m 99% sure every anon I published were ones I received BEFORE I said I wouldn’t answer anons, and thus I’m not sure anyone sent me anything under the guise it wouldn’t be published. I’m pretty sure fandom etiquette is that you don’t send anon asks you don’t expect to be answered publicly. You can ask anyone who DM’d me their hate, I didn’t respond to any of THOSE things publicly. It isn’t the proper etiquette. But yes, I published the handful of anons that I found funny in a sea of ones that were truly disgusting. So disgusting that i had to delete them the moment they came into my inbox. But I kept a few that I found entertaining because I honestly, needed a laugh. And in the middle of a panic attack, I snapped, and responded to a handful of the funnier asks. Do I regret it? Sometimes. I don’t think it helped make the situation any better... but I also don’t think I said anything that I don’t stand behind either. 
Did I talk to my friends on Discord about the asks I received? Yes. My friends were, understandably, worried about me and trying to show support. They asked me if I was getting a lot of hate about my post and I answered them honestly. And yes, the discussion did lean towards making fun of the more ridiculous defenses of Tyler’s actions. Because most of my friends on there still struggle to understand why we are defending Tyler’s actions. And most of my friends, I think, were trying to help me make light of a truly awful week for me. 
I apologize if you felt we were mocking you. But considering any ask I got was sent in an effort to silence me and make me feel bad for calling out racism, I question why I should be apologizing to you and why there’s no expectation that anyone apologize to ME for the hazing I just went through. I ask why one specific group of fandom continues to use emotional manipulation to try and silence me for simply stating facts: Tyler is NOT a POC. Why is it okay that one group of fandom can continually attack others but when those blogs say anything, then we are suddenly told that we don’t respect anyone’s mental health. I have NEVER in my life bullied anyone. Even the Tyler Stan blogs that have come to me personally, off anon, to talk about their problems with me can hopefully have enough self awareness to let you know that I was apologetic for snapping and sympathetic to their mental health issues but also stood by my opinions that racism is real and I won’t apologize for posting about it. 
I don’t care if people like Tyler. I don’t care if people’s favorite character is Alex. That is all fine with me. If you want to keep stanning Tyler and loving Alex, do so. Just know that I’m going to stand by my fans of color on this issue with Tyler and continue to post about racism. If that is something that people cannot get behind, they should 100% unfollow me and block my name. 
If you want to read my writing but disengage with my opinions, I suggest you subscribe to me on AO3 and block me on Tumblr. But also, you can just stop reading my fic too. I promise you that nothing I write is remotely special enough for people to continue risking their mental health if the things I’m doing trigger you in any way. 
Finally, I can empathize with you not having a Tumblr account to come at me with. But it sounds like you have a Discord account that you could have DM’d me on. And if you had come to me off of anon, I can 100% promise you that our interactions would have been respectful even if we disagreed. They also would have been private. But what I won’t apologize for is the fact that YOU came to ME on anon expecting some level of respect when the asks being sent to me weren’t respectful. I was accused of being the reason for Tyler’s anxiety. I was accused of being unsympathetic to a man who didn’t know his dad because his dad COULD have been native american and how did I feel about that? I was accused of trying to get Tyler fired. I was accused of a lot of awful things. 
And yet... all I did was make a post about fandom racism. And anyone getting triggered by that should perhaps ask themselves this: 
If you’ve never been racist in this fandom, why did my post feel like an attack against you? 
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Hi, I am the anonymous who asked for people who like single Katniss.
(I guess I will call myself Pepper in future, I am too much of a coward to send an direct ask )
It is just when I carve for Hunger games contents, all it seems is things I don't like. All hg fanfics and analysis being about Katniss' love, her kids and all just wears me out. And there doesn't even seem to be any Peeta×Gale shippers (At least they will leave Katniss alone and out of the mess) Especially if you just change the gender, Gale seems to be Peeta's type. (Don't know about Gale)
You are the first one whose opinions seems to resemble mine and thought you would know someone like that. (Your "Capitolite" post is the one that lead me to your tumblr, loved it).
I rather read a fic or analysis about Katniss living with her sister and being in friendly terms Gale and Peeta than the epilogue Collins (I think she aimed for a sad one, but people ignore it because "she is married and have kids isn't it the ultimate happiness") gave us. The whole love triangle was unnecessary. At least she could do is turn it into a poly relationship or avoid either Peeta or Gale falling in love with Katniss. Then she didn't have to rush up thing and chuck Gale out at the last moment.
And I do agree (a little) with your posts about Peeta. Where my disagreement come (this is going to be very controversial) is on the fact that Peeta had strong feelings (of any type) for Katniss before the arena.
Just come on, who remembers the crush you had when you were 5. Especially when it is goddamn stranger (not really a stranger, but you get my point, Peeta doesn't know Katniss enough for those feelings to settle in.)
Then why does he seem to know so much about Katniss? Remember him saying that his father said that he had a crush on Katniss' mother. It is not the sort of thing you forget and does leave an impression on you. I think his feelings for Katniss was somewhat similar to the one Katniss had for at the beginning, a mild affection mixed with some curiosity. He kept tabs on Katniss the same way she did to him. It is possible that he heard more about her from his father.
And I think on the interview, Peeta decided to play the tragic lover part, which is going earn him a lot of sympathy (And sponsors). I don't think he remotely thought of Katniss involving in his plan and probably thought that her indifference and her presumed relationship with Gale is going to play in his advantage. Haymich is the one that wanted to make it a two way. And in the arena, Katniss taking care of him seem to have made him fall in love with her. (I could be very wrong as no else seem to have this opinion and it's been a while since I read HG). And him distancing from her later struck me as an I-am-sorry than a dislike for her not returning the feelings.
His many bizarre I-have-a-crush-like actions (I don't remember them all, lol) could be chalked down to the ones of a person desperate to live. (I remember his mother telling him that he will not live, that can do a number on anyone. And Haymich doesn't seem very supportive of him)
I think their (not necessarily romantic) relationship was of mutual benefit and satisfaction though not necessarily healthy.
Anyway thanks for reading my rant (?).
Hi Pepper! So, I'll start off with saying that it does wear me out too. The story of the Hunger Games is a very rich story that goes beyond just a YA book, and yet in it's media and it's fanbase, it seems to be all about the romance, and most of the content is soaked in the starcrossed lovers bit. But to be fair, I have seen some GaleXPeeta content, but I never gave it a passing glance since it's not my cup of tea. Although, Gale being Peeta's type is an interesting thought, but Peeta certainly isn't Gale's type. Gale loved Katniss because he grew up with her and they shared a social class and experiences. I'm glad found someone of (sort of ) the same mind as me! I always wished to find more hg fans who think like me.
The ending didn't fit right with me, Katniss still seemed too restless to settle down and she never wanted kids. So I didn't like it. I think the ending was too rushed, and we could have benefitted from a longer epilogue or even another book going into more detail about Katniss's future. But we were never going to get a poly relationship, within the story it would not have worked, and the author isn't someone who does poly relationships. A lot of what is wrong with the books is because of the author's viewpoint. Okay, I see your reasoning on Peeta, and it's an interesting viewpoint! And I share many of your thoughts, but I see it just a bit differently. It was very clear that he remembered Katniss and loved her, or rather he loves the idea of her he has in his head. Katniss remarks often on how he sees her differently than how she actually is. And Peeta is very smart, he knew from the beginning how to play the game. He figured telling people about his love would make the gamemakers go for a couple angle, and that would be a way to save Katniss, plus getting both of them out alive. And he was right. He's not the type of person to act out of desperation, even in Peeta's lowest moments he never acted desperately. Katniss says herself that Peeta was playing the game, and she was right. The problem is that he presumed Katniss had a secret affection for him. He thought she loved him deep down like he loved her.
But she didn't. She had zero affections romantically for him besides a sense of obligation and curiosity because of the bread. In the arena he seemed thrilled that she was finally "coming around." And he definitely got angry at Katniss when she revealed she had just been faking, she says herself that he was pushing her away and acting coldly and unfair. He would pretend in front of the cameras in order to keep himself and her safe, but then not talk to her, and it's only until a whole six months later that he finally admits she was right to pretend to keep them both alive.
Their relationship was necessary to keep them both alive, and they would have been wonderful friends. But Katniss should never have been with him romantically. As @kapriccosa says, the way that Katniss is written as needing Peeta to survive and find peace (plus having his kids when she was clearly reluctant to) is a trope that really isn't the best.
Katniss needed to be free as she could of any entanglements that had the taint of the capitol, she needed to be able to figure out who she was when she didn't have to be preforming for cameras and or surviving. And it's really irritating that we didn't get the slightest bit of that.
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mister-lady · 3 years
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geez, i love your writing so much. water totally does have a taste tho. otherwise when you went to other places besides your house you wouldn't think that the water tasted weird there!!! which i'm now realizing might just be a me thing lol. anyway! if it's okay to send another prompt (i don't wanna overwork you!) then howa bout 9 with Remus cuz you said you didn't like him at first and the prompt says "forced to spend time together"!!!
*sobs* th-thANK yoUu!!!! And exactly!!!! Water has a taste!!!!! Janus doesn't agree tho smh. I definelty get that tho! One of my friends house that I go to I cant have their water cause it tastes funky to me dkkvkskg.
AAA ILLYYYY🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💘💘💘💘💘❤💘❤❤❤💘❤💘❤💘❤❤❤🌟❤❤❤❤❤❤💘💘💘💘🌟🌟🌟🌟you're not overworking me at all!!!!!!!! I'm absolutely loving all of these thank you sososoo muchhh🥺🥺🥺🥺👉👈👉👈👉👈👉👈👉😭👈👈😭😭😭🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺💘❤💕❤💕❤💕❤❤💕 this was super fun to do!!! Especially becuase I normally don't talk much about my enemies to lovers thing with Remus so it was kinda nice to almost project it onto here!!!🥰🥰🥰 Also sorry I got a little carried away while writing and it got a little off-topic from the prompt-
Prompt: A moves into a new apartment and wants to check out the closest dog park. Their dog loves it there, especially that one dog that seems to be there almost every time they go. With their dogs being madly in love with each other, A and the other owner, B, are forced to spend more time together as well
Warnings: strong curse words used a minor amount. Very small angst.
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Matt had moved into an apartment, hoping to build up some money for a home. He was living the life though, being able to do things when he wanted, without people complaining at him. However, Matt had gotten a little lonely so he did the best solution! He got a pet. Now, Matt normally wasn't a fan of dogs, mainly ones that barked a lot, but when he had been searching through the animal shelter and found a very peaceful dog. It was maybe around 1 year old and it was a small poneramium. Normally small dogs barked a lot but this one was fairly quiet and Matt liked it for that. He named his dog Siskel. Since an apparment was a small place Matt had searched up local dog parks he could take his dog to and let it play for a bit and get some exercise. Matt was unbelievably happy when his dog had found another dog friend! He thought they were adorable together and seemed to get along so well too! What he hated was the rat-bastard that owned the dog. You know how theres the couple in movies that want be together but the parents hate eachother? It was essentially that for Matt, but it was one-sided. The other person seemed to find Matt amusing, even though Matt had often showed that he didn't care much for him. Sometimes Matt would feel bad for the way he treated the person, he never gave him a true chance. But then the person would say something that made Matt stop feeling as guilty. The downfall for Matt was that he had scheduled days that he could go to the park where he had free time so it's not like he could ignore the other guy either. Plus, he would feel bad for depriving his puppy of it's friend just because Matt had been salty.
Matt had currently been sitting on a bench at the dog park and was keeping a close eye on Siskel. He made sure to keep his dog on a leash incase it did go to do soemthing bad, he could pull it back, plus, he didn't have to worry about Siskel running off either. Matt could tell just by the way his dog acted, that it was impatiently waiting for it's friend to arrive. Matt was trying to take it's mind off of waiting for it's friend and was throwing a pinecone for his dog. He would use a toy but if another dog came up who knew wheres its mouth had been? Siskel knew not to fully bite on the pinecone, but it would still bark at it and pretend to play with it. Matt couldn't help but smile as he watched. Though, poor Matthew's smile didn't last for long as he felt the same ol' guy sit next to him. Matt knew a little information about him, like his name and such, but only because he had told him like Matt had asked.
"Hey, Maaattttt!!" He chimed.
"Hi, Remus" Matt huffed.
Matt watched as the dogs quickly ran up to eachother and played with a pinecone together. It was very wholesome. However Matt casted a confused glance towards Remus, not understanding why he was so silent.
"You're quiet." Matt commented, while raising an eyebrow.
"I am?" Remus asked, as if he wasn't aware of what Matt was talking about.
"Yeah, normally you're rambling on about something that happened to you, or about how you poisoned your enemies cake or soemthing." Matt soon regretted speaking up, as he watched a very amused smile grow across Remus's face.
Remus gave Matt a very tight hug, causing Matt to squeak from alarm. Matt couldn't help but notice now warm Remus had felt and he could feel the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed.
"Wh-.. what?" Matt questioned.
"You do listen!!! I was always afraid you never listened to my stories!" Remus seemed to be bursting with excitement.
"Well, I mean I kinda have too, you tail me around against my will." Matt flatly pointed out.
"Pssshh, yeah cuase you don't like me. Totally"
"I hate you. And why are you still hugging me??"
Remus withdrew and let go of the hug. Matt could've sworn he thought Remus looked a little upset for a moment, but if he did it was quickly replaced by happiness.
"You knowwww... it took you a little while for you to tell me to stop hugging youuu" Remus teased.
"You're honestly the biggest idiot I know and it hurts to be around you."
"You can insult me all you want but it's not going to change the fact that you like my hugs!"
"You're a lunatic and burn down places. The last thing I want is your hugs."
"Is that why you let me hug you?"
"I didn't let you hug me! If I did I would've hugged back. But I didn't."
"You let me hug you and you listen to what I say? Mmmmm... I'm pretty sure you like me."
"I don't like you, I'm just that lonely."
"Most people that don't like me get a restraining order, so you must like me to some extent, right?" Remus gave Matt a puppy-eyed look.
Matt groaned in annoyance. "I just might if I have to sit here any longer."
"That's not a no~"
"And it's definitely not a yes."
"Well, it's not a no, so I'll take what I can get."
"You're a dunce."
"I still don't see why you hang out with me so much then."
"Hang?? Out?? I-? Me??- with yOu??-" Matt stumbled over his words in aghast. "Okay, I certainly don't, and would never, hang out with you, Remus. You come up to me. I deal with it because for some stupid reason my dog likes your dog, and I do what's good for my dog because I have a little bit of common sense."
Remus pouted at Matt's little tangent and crossed his arms. "Fine. I won't talk with you then. Maybe then you'll like me more."
Matt shook his head, "Why do you care so much for whether I like you or not?"
Remus only glared at him and didn't respond. Matt decided to take the opportunity of peace and quiet, however, as time started to pass, he felt like something was bugging him. Like he was itching to do soemthing and he didn't know what. Like something was...off. He gave Remus a curious glance, wondering if he had done something, but by the looks of it he was behaving like a decent human being. If that was the case, then what was bugging Matt?? He had gotten what he wished for, had he not? He subconsciously gave Remus an almost longing kind of look, and Remus met his gaze for a split second, only to look away. Matt couldn't help but fear a pang of hurt in his heart, only to be quickly filled with frustration at himself. Remus complete was the opposite of a normal, decent, and civilized person. All he did was annoy Matt, so why did Matt feel bad? He quickly answered his own question. Remus hadn't done anything bad directly towards Matt, and Matt had acted like a huge douche towards him for no reason. Matt felt his eyes water up a bit at the realization and quickly blinked it away. He felt terrible for the way he had acted.
"I'm sorry." Matt spoke, his voice cracking a little bit causing him to inwardly cringe.
Remus looked at him, but gave him a questioning look as if asking him to go on.
"I'm sorry for being a massive and terrible douche towards you. You hadn't done anything wrong, if anything, out of all the things you've told me about I should be lucky that you didn't do anything to me and I'm really, really, sorry and I know that doesn't really change anything but I completely understand if you don't forgive me, and honestly with the way I've treated you I probably don't deserve your forgiveness." Matt had gotten repeatedly choked up as he spoke and had to keep clearing his throat or blinking away the water in his eyes in a sad attempt to hide what he was feeling.
Remus eyes had widened in surprise. That was by far not what he had expected at all. He didn't expect too much of an appology especially from Matt, so the heart felt appology took him a few seconds to process.
"..Matt?" Remus spoke.
"Yea?"
"Can I hug you?"
Matt quickly nodded his head and felt his face twist as he felt a few tears go down his face agaisnt his will. He didn't realize all the weird feelings he had subconsciously bottled up, but as Remus tackled him into a hug, almost knocking him off the bench they had been sitting on, Matt couldn't help but sniffle a little bit. He felt the warmth from Remus engulf him again, and his mind drifted to how nice Remus's arms and hands had felt to be wrapped around him. Matt tried to calm down his sudden emotions and breathed a little more slowly, and slowly slithered his arms up and around Remus's back and rested his head on his shoulder.
"We never speak of this to anyone." Matt mumbled.
Remus giggled and nodded his head in agreement, causing Matt to laugh a little bit himself.
"I knew you always liked me a little bit." Remus teased.
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pennemac · 4 years
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walk through fire for you (just let me adore you)
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Chapter 1 ▪︎Even At 3am
Series Summary- This is my first attempt at writing with criminal minds characters! The show has recently become one of my favorite things to write and ramble about. This is a series of works that are written around an autistic Spencer Reid, and his journey's of finding comfort and joy within his team.
Chapter Summary- Spencer finally reaches out when he's struggling with a bout of sensory overload. It takes a whole lot of courage on his part and a good dose of platonic love from his boss to calm him down. (ft. Spencer's stuffed axolotl)
Warnings/Topics- Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Talk of sensory issues, Crying, The beginnings of a panic attack, Platonic cuddling, A good dose of Hotch being a dad through and through :)
I post these on ao3 first! my ao3 is here
Word Count- 1.9k
There's a light pattering of the beginning of a storm outside of the hotel room window, and Spencer is so tired. He has been, in fact, for the last two days, 16 hours, and 43 minutes. 
If Spencer was any semblance of normal, he thinks, he would probably be soothed by the little sounds of rain, but he's not. In fact, it's angering him. It's a constant white noise sound, like television static, but worse, because it can't just be turned off by the click of a button. He isn't even entirely sure why it's making him as mad as it is. 
The sound itself is even making him acutely aware of the way unfamiliar sheets feel against his legs, and the way his hair won't stay out of his face. It's alot, honestly. With every second that passes, the rain makes him more and more upset. None of his usual tactics of calming down have worked so far, either. 
He hasn't been able to read, because his brain felt like it was being drowned out by the sounds of rain against various outdoor surfaces. Music, though he'd never been a huge fan of anything other than soft piano, had also felt as though it was simply accompanying the rain, assisting it in it's attempt to make him breakdown. 
It starts out like this, usually. The discomfort, leading into being easily aggravated, but from then it's everything setting him off. Rain, the constant chatter of a room filled with busy police officers, the ticking of a clock, the texture of his pants, or sheets, or any unfamiliarity. 
He's been trying to sleep for days, but he hasn't been able to. To combat this, he'd been consuming copious amounts of coffee. This had made him more twitchy, antsy, than he had been before. His hands now, even, shake as he throws the blankets and sheets off of his legs. 
The frustration reaches it's peak though, when he has to struggle to pull his socks off of his feet, and tears fall from his eyes as he leans back onto the bed. As he tries his best to just breathe, he remembers how Hotch had separated him from the rest of their team, pulling him aside and out of the crowded room, as if he'd had an innate sense that he hadn't been doing well. 
"Do you need to leave, Reid? I won't make you stay here if it's not going to be beneficial for others or for yourself." 
He hadn't managed to give a complete answer, just nodding, hands curling into his pant legs. "Go with Morgan to the mortuary. I was going to send him alone but the quiet of a car will do you good." 
His boss had moved to lay a hand onto his shoulder, deciding not to when Spencer had visibly flinched. "I am completely serious when I say that you have to stop over exerting yourself. It does nobody any good when you render yourself useless to others." 
Spencer had frowned, not exactly happy with being reprimanded, but he knew that Aaron was certainly correct. 
"Beyond that, though, I understand. I made an agreement when I hired you into this team that I'd be here when you need me. You have to reach out to someone when it's necessary." 
So now, as he sits in the dark of his room, he does his best to remind himself that it's okay to reach out when he needs someone. His hands are shaky as he finds his bosses contact and presses call before he can over think it. 
It's answered fairly quickly. "Reid? What's going on?" 
"I'm- it's not anything serious I'm just… I think I'm gonna have a panic attack and I haven't slept for nearly three days, I don't know how to stop it." 
He knows how weak his voice sounds, and he hates it. His hands clench and unclench in his bedsheets. Tears continue to slip down his face and his shoulders and neck feel tense. 
He hears a the rustling of sheets on the other side of the call before he gets a response. "Can you come up here? You know my room number, yes?" 
"Yeah. Yeah, I do." 
"Okay, come up to my room, then. You're gonna be okay." 
He nods, only realizing afterwards that Hotch couldn't actually see it. He tosses his own phone into the open duffle bag by the foot of his bed. The room he's in is uncomfortably dark, and he hesitates for a moment before he moves to reach into the black bag, pulling out a small-ish stuffed axolotl. 
It's soft, and the eyes are embroidered, rather than buttons or beads, so they feel nice for his hands to run over. The texture is soft but smooth, and he's grateful that it's that rather than shaggy or rough. 
When he's made it up onto the third floor, rather than the second, where his room was, his embarrassment levels had risen and by the time he'd made it up to the door, he heavily considered turning back. 
Spencer's grateful when he only has to knock once for the door to open. 
Hotch stands in the doorway, and this is probably the only time that Spencer would ever see him in just sweatpants and a soft shirt. 
He moves out of the way once he realizes who it is, letting him walk into the room. 
His boss moves in front of him, to sit on the large bed in the middle of the dimly lit space. 
"What animal is that?" He points vaguely at the pink stuffed animal clutched in shaky hands. 
Spencer stands awkwardly across from the bed, his hands fiddling gently with the eyes and the tail of the toy. "It's, uhm… an axolotl. Penelope got it for me cause she knows textures I like and don't like." 
Hotch gently sits back to make room for him. He pats the empty space, hoping that Spencer will take the invitation to sit. He does, watching his own hands as if avoiding looking up at his coworker. 
"Do you wanna talk about what's been happening? It's okay if you don't want to talk about it, but it can be a good distraction." 
He nods slowly, tucking his legs in to sit cross legged. "I- the rain. It's like… t.v. static. I haven't been able to sleep because the sheets are so unfamiliar…" 
One hand moves up to hardly brush a tear from his cheek. God, he hates this. Vulnerability doesn't come easy to him, it never has. He knows how tight his breathing is, and that realistically he should start breathing deeper to ensure that he doesn't become light headed but- it's a lot easier to say than to do. 
"Can I touch your hands, Spencer?" 
The man in question gives an affirmative nod and watches as hands slightly larger than his own come into his line of vision, wrapping around one hand that isn't wrapped around the body of a stuffed animal.
"I know it's tough, but can you breath for me? Just a few deep breaths?" 
Fingers flex between Aaron's own, squeezing in what he's fairly certain is an effort to ground himself. 
Tears drop down steadily still, and one lands softly on the back of Hotch's hand. 
A thumb circles slowly in the dip of where Spencer's hand meets his wrist. "I do hate to seem any kind of strict right now, but… Spencer, I know how hard it is to tell us when you start struggling. What I need you to know though, is that when Gideon agreed to have you on this team, and when I made the decision to keep you here, we knew exactly what we were doing." 
A small sob comes from Spencer, and it deepens Aaron's own frown. 
"You are an incredible asset to our team. You are the driving force to solving most cases we come across. There's nothing you could do, or show, or say, to us that would make us value or love you any less. If that means this, or telling us you need a break, or letting through more tendencies or quirks when we're working- all of that is good. You do so good, I jus-" 
He's cut off abruptly when his hands are shaken away and Spencer all but tackles him into a hug, arms wrapping around his neck and face pressing into his shoulder. 
"And here I thought you were always so worried about germs." 
Spencer sobs lightly, tears dampening the material under his face. His legs rest on the outside of Aaron's thighs, his weight settled on his legs. The man below him tentatively brings hands around his back to envelope him in a hug, hands rubbing down to ease the tension where he can. 
"It's- it's so much." 
And this, at least, Aaron can understand. His breathing doesn't even out more than it had, and Aaron would be much more worried if he didn't know that at least in some sense, this would tire him out. So, instead of urging him to calm down as he'd mistakenly done before, when he was less aware of Spencer's diagnosis, he takes a different route. 
"Spencer, name 3 things you can feel." 
Light sniffles come and shaky breaths still echo in his right ear, but he moves to where his mouth won't be muffled. 
"That method of- of calming people down is something they use on kids-" 
"Three things, Reid." 
He huffs a little bit, but obeys. "Your hands." He shifts where he sits. "The- uhm, the bedsheets under my knees." 
One hand goes up to his face, pulling strands of hair back to tuck it behind his ear. "My face is really warm." 
Even though Spencer was right, the method of describing different sensory inputs was something people use on children, it was working well enough for him that Aaron wasn't going to stop using it. 
"Three things you can see?" 
He lifts his head from the shoulder it had been resting on, eyes moving around the room. He looks down slightly. "My hands are shaking." A glance to the left, afterwards, "My stuffed animal is to your left." 
"And your lamp is on, but it's… dim." 
His voice is soft, and it makes him seem small. He feels small too, body trembling under Aaron's hands. 
"Can you smell anything?" 
Spencer moves his head in a gesture of affirmation. "Your cologne." He pauses to pull in a deep breath. "Cleaning products, several." 
He's breathing is beginning to fade into a normal pace, and there's less shake to his voice. 
"Taste?" 
"Mint… my uh, my toothpaste. Coffee." 
Strong hands move up to his shoulders and neck, massaging lightly into the skin there. 
"Hm. What about sounds?" 
There's a silence in the room now. Spencer sits up slightly with realization. "The rain. It's not raining anymore." 
"Mhm. Maybe the universe listened to you, for once." 
He nods softly. 
They sit like this for a moment, Spencer relaxing into the pressure of Aaron's hands, his tears slowly to a stop. 
"Can I… Stay in here? I don't think I'll be able to sleep alone." 
Hotch gives a single nod, and it would have seemed curt, but his face is soft. "Of course." 
Spencer moves slowly off of him, fumbling for the pink toy before he lays down completely. 
Hotch moves to do the same, but notes briefly the distance that had been put between them. "You can come back over here, y'know." 
A tense breath was released and it brings a small smile onto the older mans face as he feels Spencer wiggle back up to his side, one arm laying over his stomach and a head resting against his chest. He takes the opportunity to wrap arm back around slender shoulders, only after lightly brushing stay strands of hair behind Spencer's ear.
"Goodnight, kid." 
"Night Hotch."
4 notes · View notes
wontokkiluv97 · 5 years
Text
Club Love
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A few little notes:
I'm real nervous about posting this but hi! This will be multi chaptered & I promise Wonho appears in the next chapter! It's very loosely based on my own experiences hah!
The only warning for now is for profanity I guess, that may change in the future...
This will be cross posted on Ao3 as well
That's it I guess! Hope you enjoy ~♡
"I really don't wanna go to a club this is not my type of thing..." You said with an edge of exasperation seeping through the phone, as you lay in your bed refusing to get up.
"Oh come on (Y/N), we're in freaking Japan you can't just hole yourself up in your room all the time." Your friend Amber replied with a whine in her tone. "You gotta let loose and have some fun sometimes, pull that stick out of your ass for god sake."
"I don't have a stick up my ass, fuck you Amber. I just don't see the appeal of being in a crowded room with the music blasting and being pushed around by a bunch sweaty people. Also, some of us haven't taken 3 semesters of Japanese, it's not like I can even flirt with anyone." You answered a bit sulkily. You were studying abroad in Japan for the semester, and even though you tried to teach yourself as much Japanese as possible before coming, the University you attended until now didn't offer Japanese courses like Amber's did, so you never got a formal Japanese education.
"Flirting has no language just come on it'll be fun!" She begged.
"Alright fine," you answered with a defeated tone, "But I'm gonna have to be drunk for this or it's not gonna happen."
"Of course! Hurry up and get ready, we'll take the train to Shibuya and stop at a Sev and pregame with some Strong Zeros. Meet me downstairs at 11." She blurted excitedly.
"What the hell am I even suppo-" you started before you heard a click indicating that Amber had hung up the phone. You pulled the phone away from your ear and looked at the time, 22:37, before groaning and rolling over onto your stomach and burying your face into the pillow and sighing loudly.
After a minute or 2 you pulled yourself out of bed and walked over to the dresser and began looking for something to wear. You scrutinized your closet for a few more minutes before purposely ignoring your more risqué outfits and settling on a thin cropped black sweater with shoulder cut outs and simple but tight, high-waisted white washed blue jeans. You quickly threw on the outfit then walked over to your bed and sat on the floor, eyeing the few pairs of shoes you brought before deciding against the heels and putting on a simple pair of black flats. You then walked over to the mirror and looked at yourself, debating whether or not it was worth it to put makeup on, before simply applying eyeliner and mascara and being done with it. As you were grabbing your bag and throwing your wallet in it, being sure that your resident's card was in it in case the police decided to stop you since your University threatened they would, Amber was sending text after text telling you to hurry out. You responded quickly telling her to "calm her tits" you grabbed your badge to get back in the dorm and your passmo for the subway and left your room.
______
You, Amber, and another mutual friend Jules, were precariously sitting on a guard rail on the side of the road right next to Seven Eleven, each of you nursing your third strong zero and most certainly feeling a rather strong buzz at this point, arguing about the alcohol content of the regular cans versus the larger cans.
"Dude, that doesn't even make sense." You argued squinting at Amber and pointing a finger in her direction.
"How does it not make sense?" She questioned right back, "If I'm drinking a tall strong zero, it's like drinking 2 regular strong zeros and therefore has an 18% alcohol content."
"Are you stupid?" Jules jabbed at Amber. "Both the regular and tall strong zeros are labeled as 9% alcohol, which means drinking 2 small ones will get you more drunk than one tall one."
"That still sounds wrong to me..." you replied hesitantly, because for some reason Jules' argument was swaying you when you knew if you hadn't been drinking at all, you wouldn't have given it a second thought. "Either way I think the fact that we are having this conversation proves that we are well on our way to being drunk so we should chug the last of these and head to the club." You said before doing just that with the last of yours and cringing at the aftertaste. You really weren't a fan of grapefruit but it was the only flavor they had left at the Seven Eleven.
"Oh, someone's impatient considering I had to drag your ass here in the first place." Amber commented with a smirk before her and Jules finished their drinks as well.
"Don't let the alcohol get to your head. You couldn't drag me anywhere if you tried."
"Sure babe whatever helps you sleep at night." Jules replied with snark.
"You know, I'm feeling really attacked right now, maybe I should just go home." You replied sarcastically.
"And waste a perfectly good buzz? Nah, lets go." Amber answered as she got off the guard rail and you and Jules followed behind her, since she knew where the club was.
_____
"TADA!" Amber screeched. "Welcome to Camelot, AKA the best club in Shibuya!"
"How do you know it's the best club in Shibuya?" You asked sarcastically. "Have you been to every club here?"
"I know you're trying to be funny but I honestly probably have, you know I go clubbing on weekdays too."
"Yeah I know, because you always miss class the next day and ask me for notes. Honestly they can fail your ass for breaking the attendance policy."
"I'd like to see them try."
"Can y'all shut up so we can go inside?" Jules asked heading into the club and you and Amber continued to bicker as you followed behind her.
You all walked down the stairs to the front desk gave the attendent your residence cards to inspect and paid the 1500 yen entrance fee for the club. She gave all three of you 2 free drink tokens and permitted you to enter the club. The club had several small circular tables spread throughout where there were various people smoking and drinking. Straight ahead was the bar in which there was a small line of people waiting their turn to order drinks. Further to your right you analyzed the dance floor where there was a small crowd of people dancing and jumping up and down. There was a fog machine periodically adding more fog to the atmosphere and red green and blue flashing lights. At the very front of the dance floor there was a stage with a DJ hyping up the crowd. There were three platforms on the dance floor that only girls were permitted to dance on. No one explicity told you that, but you assumed that was the case when you saw security guards pull guys down from the platform if they attempted to get on them. The music was so loud you couldn't hear Amber trying to get your attention so she smacked your arm instead.
"Ow you bitch, what do you want?!" You asked loudly, trying to raise your voice over the music.
"Do you have 100 yen?" Amber questioned.
"Yeah, for what?"
"There are some lockers over there we can put our stuff in, it cost 300 yen for the night. I figure we could all just share one for 100 yen each."
"Sounds good to me! C'mon let's go." Jules shouted.
The three of you walked to the locker room, taking some money out of your bags before stuffing them in the locker and taking the key. Your friends left the key in your care since even though you were all a little drunk already, you were known to be the more responsible one. You all left the locker room and walked to the bar and used your first drink tokens. Amber and Jules got tequila sunrises while you just got whiskey on the rocks. Not the tastiest but hey, if you're gonna make it through this night you're gonna need to be much more drunk and it needs to be right now.
"Hey Y/N!" Jules shouted both her and Amber already finished with their drinks. "C'mon let's go dance on the podiums!"
"I'll meet you guys there! Lemme just finish my drink." You yelled back and the others nodded in agreement before running over to the podiums and jumping up on them, dancing like maniacs immediately. You sighed as you downed the rest of your whiskey, and shook off that familiar burn. You mumbled to yourself as you walked over to join them.
"God it's gonna be a long night..."
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hsj-scenarios · 6 years
Note
heyo, lately i've been suffering awful depressions that cause me insomnia and tiredness at once. i always feel the need to cry and i am just so tired of everything ... mostly depressed because of my looks. sometimes it just happens to me that i just skip school or try to avoid going outside or i hide my face in public places.. is there something you could write about best? something like helping their girlfriends deal with this.. i don't know i can't write prompts or anything.. hahaha sorry
Title: He just held you closer. Pairing/Relationship: All members x ReaderRating: GWarnings: Depression, self-image issuesGenre: Hurt/ComfortType: Oneshot 
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Dearest Nonnie-chan–I FEEL YOU. We are together on a deeply spiritual level here–not even joking! I am so sorry you struggle with these feelings. I wanted to send you encouragement through this story. I hope you feel my love through the words, and I hope you know that I really do believe this. Every word, everything I wrote–I believe our boys would be this way.
Love you always and forever!!! 
Mod J
Please note:
I wrote this story a little differently than normal. I intended to write a story for each of the members, however, as I wrote it, I realized there REALLY were only a few parts of the story that would be different for each member. I wrote the story to fit ALL of the members because I sincerely think it does! After the story, I provide headcanons for what I think would be unique to each member in this situation. 
BONUS:
I did the members of 7 as well! MMMWAH!
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The knock was becoming louder and you couldn’t seem to lift your head off the couch. You heard the key slip into the lock, and pushed your face into the pillow, because you certainly didn’t want to see anyone today, but you most certainly did not want to see him today.
You heard the door open, his whispered voice as he didn’t want to step inside and scare you, “Baby? You here?”
“No,” you called out, pulling the blankets over your head and feeling a deep pain roll across you that he was in the room with you. You felt your eyes sting with tears, taking a shuddering breath as you drew up into yourself, curling into a ball.
He moved into the room, the door clicking closed behind him, and part of you wished, or perhaps thought it would be right, that he would just leave, just go and leave you alone. You didn’t want to make him sad, you didn’t want to make anyone sad–you just needed to be still and not try to interact because you just weren’t humaning very good these days.
You heard him shuffle over to the couch, making noise so he wouldn’t startle you. You could see through the knit blanket the way he approached you. Slowly, cautiously, like he was walking toward a caged animal–and you understood, because he had never been around you when you experienced one of your episodes.
It had been something you’d managed to avoid–with his hectic schedule and your own methods of covering up and distractions–but this time, he wouldn’t let your normal excuses fly. This time, you were fairly certain at least, he had been clued into your condition by your mother. You would have words with her later about the level of her treachery, you had bigger things to deal with at the moment.
He moved to you, sitting down on his knees by where he was guessing your head was, and you blinked back tears as you saw the concern on his face, the way he frowned, and his eyes were shaded with worry and a tinge of fear.
I am the worst person ever to make him suffer like this. I should never have given him the key. What was I thinking?
You were thinking no one else lived close to you in case there was an emergency.
I guess–but I didn’t ever want to make him hurt–look at what I am doing to him, he’s so sad and hurt and I did that–you did that!
Don’t worry, he’ll see you like this and that will be that, won’t it?
Yes, I guess that’s true, he’ll leave me for sure once he realizes how messed up and fragile and stupid I am.
Probably.
Definitely.
That’s the least of what you deserve! Honestly, I have no idea what he ever saw in me in the first place–maybe it was just being charitable because he’s such a nice guy–and you’ve been waiting to mess this up all along because it never fit. 
You never fit with him. He’s an idol for goodness sake, he’s beautiful and perfect and has the best personality and I am like a rock, a lump of ugly next to him. 
You never deserved him. Not for a second. He should be with someone who equals him.
Nope, never deserved him. I don’t deserve anyone or anything ever at…
Your self castigation was interrupted when you heard him take a deep breath, leaning forward, his hand moving to lay on your shoulder, his fingers flexing softly as he shifted, his voice soft, “Hey…”
You didn’t try to speak, you hadn’t spoken out loud in days, you weren’t even sure that you remembered what your own voice sounded like at this point, so you just hummed, but it was a sad sound, a sound meant to cast him off, push him away, but he didn’t move, he just blinked, and then he shifted closer.
And then, he was covering you, his entire upper body was pressing against you, his arms wrapping around you to hold you against his chest, his head buried against your neck and your entire body stiffened, you held your breath, every system seeming to lock up.
You groaned, it felt like your bones were going to snap, it felt like the weight of him was going to break you into pieces, and he turned his head, his mouth near your ear and his words were soft, “It’s okay. I’m here. You’re not alone.”
Your eyes clenched shut and you couldn’t breath, and yet, his words continued, “I’m sorry I wasn’t here earlier. I was working, but I sent you so many messages, and you didn’t answer. I was scared.”
He took a deep breath, “I called your Mom. I know that’s not cool. I know…I’m sorry. I was just…so worried.”
You shifted, turning your face away from him, as if he could actually see you, even though he couldn’t.
“I called…so many times…I was…I was just so scared.”
I’m a horrible person. I know he was messaging me and I just ignored them all. 
You want him to go, you want him to leave you.
I never deserved him.
You felt the tears fall, and you couldn’t breath, you didn’t want to, didn’t want to do this, didn’t want to let him see you cry.
“I love you.”
NO!
You pushed him, you reached out and shoved him, and he just moved closer, grabbed you harder, squeezed you tighter.
“I love you.”
Stop it!
You growled, the tears uncontrollable, and you shoved him again, trying to push him away, trying to make him go. He held onto you like his life depended on it.
“I love you!”
You won’t, not if you know!
“Shut up!” your voice was hoarse and rough, you shifted, pushing harder, twisting to get your feet up, and then he pulled back and he jerked the blanket down off your face and you squealed, grabbing a pillow and covering yourself, “Don’t look at me!”
He held you still, his hand coming up to cup your head, drawing you into his chest, holding you as your body shook with emotion, a broken sob escaping as you tried to gather your strength.
“It’s okay, stop trying to hide from me.”
“I-I…you need to go!” You pushed at him, but it was weak, it was a feeble attempt because there was a part of you that was comforted, finding some measure of solace there in his embrace.
You don’t deserve such things! Push him away, make him leave!
You pushed him again, crying harder. 
“Don’t hide from me,” he repeated the words, “I love you. I am not leaving, so stop pushing me away.”
You will leave, when you know the truth! You’ll leave.
“Go!”
His hand moved, stroking your hair, your body shaking as your tears increased, and he didn’t tell you to stop, didn’t try to calm you down.
“Please, just go!”
He just held you closer. 
His voice was soft, laced with feelings, “I want to share something with you…”
You couldn’t stop crying to acknowledge him, but he continued, “I don’t think I ever told you how it was growing up as a Johnny…did I?”
He didn’t wait for you to answer, his voice soft as he continued, “I didn’t exactly fit in. I felt really self conscious about myself. I mean, that’s bound to happen when you’re surrounded by beautiful people I guess…”
You wanted to laugh, wanted to slap him because honestly, how could he be so stupid. He was beautiful, more beautiful than any of them. How could he see himself so wrong, so unclear. 
“Not just about my looks either. I mean I wondered at my ability to sing, because you know that’s pretty terrifying. I wondered if I could dance? Could I be poised? Could I do this? I watched others, and I continually thought that I wasn’t as gifted of a performer or dancer. When I first started, I was kind of lost. I was really lucky to be surrounded by others who helped me, but it didn’t really make me feel any different about myself because when I saw myself, I just still saw a distorted, terrified version of me.”
He sighed, and you took a deep breath, trying to understand what he was saying.
“I mean, I felt this way for a really long time. I was glad to be a Johnny, of course, but there were struggles. It’s a very superficial environment, and it’s easy to get caught up in weird ideas of success and fame and popularity,”
“Sometimes, I was really glad to have people focus their attention on others and not me. But, I mean, that’s stupid, right?”
He laughed but it lacked real humor, “I mean I wanted to be an idol! If you don’t want people to look at you, then you’ve clearly picked the wrong career, but I wanted it. I really did. So, it was all very confusing.”
He squeezed you softly, “I mean…I liked the attention. I liked when people appreciated me, and when they cared, and I started to get fan letters and things–and when fans would cheer, or hold up an uchiwa with my name on it. There’s not a feeling that matches it.”
“But this fear continued to be a part of me–this feeling that I wasn’t all of the things that everyone else was. Someone was always better, always taller or shorter or more athletic, funnier, quieter, sang better, danced better, handled things better, was more popular, more outgoing, more talented. I felt like I was nothing compared to them.”
You pulled back, trying to look at him, hurt by the things he was revealing, your tears heavy, your breath jagged, one word slipping through your lips, “Lies.”
He smiled, it was sad smile, “I believed I was nothing compared to them.”
You shook your head, “Stop, please…”
“I wouldn’t lie to you,” he murmured, leaning forward to kiss your forehead, and then resting it against your own, “I still struggle with those feelings sometimes.”
“W-why?” You couldn’t wrap your mind around it. He was so beautiful, his personality was amazing, and he was such a fun person, so full of light and happiness and child-like joy–how could he see himself as anything other than the amazing guy he is?
He shrugged, “I’m human. It happens.”
You stared at him, your breath caught in your chest as the words settled over you.
“Do you understand?” His hand brushed through your hair, a tentative smile crossing his lips, “You’re human, too. It’s okay to be human. That’s what we have to remember.”
You struggled with the thought, with the understanding, not able to come to terms with it.
“I love you,” he whispered, and you laughed, a broken sob escaping as you shook your head.
“I really do love you,” he spoke the words louder, “It’s okay to be sad, it’s okay to struggle, it’s okay to see yourself in a way that is contrary to how others see you.”
“You shouldn’t…”
“I shouldn’t what?”
“Love me.”
“I can’t help it, I love you, it’s a fixed point in my life,” he leaned back from you, forcing you to look into his eyes, “I’m not leaving you, I love you.”
“But why!?” 
The words came out as a deep mournful plea, and you tried to push him away again, your agitation flaring up, and he grabbed your face in both of his hands, not letting you look away, not letting you hide from him, his words firm and concise, “Because you are YOU!”
“I’m nothing! I’m nothing at all, it is crazy for you to love me!”
He shook his head, his thumbs stroking your cheeks as a fresh wave of tears fell, “I’m crazy in love with you, that’s all…you’re perfect, I love every single thing about you.”
He leaned forward, rubbing his nose against your own, “Your eyes are so beautiful, they shine, they radiate joy and happiness and love, I see it in your eyes, and it takes my breath away.”
“Your hair is so soft and silky and smooth, and it shines so bright, when the sun hits it sometimes it seems like it’s got strands of gold in it.”
“Your cheeks are so sweet, they flare bright red when I look at you too long, or when I tell you these things.”
He laughed when your cheeks grew hot under his hands, “Your lips are so soft, so squishy, it’s the reason I can’t stop kissing them!”
You laughed despite yourself, and he smiled, “I could go from head to toe and tell you all of the things I love about you, about your body, about your face, about every facet of you–but it’s not just that, it’s not just how you look, despite me thinking you are the most breathtaking work of art in all of creation–no, it’s more than that…”
You tried to believe him, wanted to believe him, but it was hard to imagine that these words were true, not when you felt the way you were feeling, but he held you still, wouldn’t let you shy away from him, “I love everything about you. I love the way you smile, I love the way you speak your words with such conviction. The way you put your shoes on and tie them. The common, every day things that I notice about you. I love all of those aspects of you. I love how you see the world and how you help others see it.”
He stared at you for a moment, and then he kissed you softly, “You are who you are because you struggle with these feelings. You wouldn’t be you without the pain. I see the truth in you through my own life–these times of darkness are exactly why you shine so brightly the rest of the time.”
You considered this, considered his thoughts, his words, and tilted your head in wonder.
“You are you because you struggle with depression, because you see yourself the way you do,” he kissed you again, drawing back slowly, “…and that’s okay, I wouldn’t tell you to change it, not at all, what I would tell you to do is to listen to what other people say, not just your own voice. It’s easy to think of others as just saying things to be polite, to be nice–but honestly, our world isn’t that good, people aren’t that good.”
You both laughed at that thought, because he wasn’t wrong.
“You also need to believe me.”
You blinked, nodding your head, knowing it was true, knowing that it would probably be the thing you struggled with the most.
“I won’t ever lie to you, not about anything, and most certainly, I wouldn’t lie or mislead you about how much I love you, how much I adore you.”
You pulled him forward into a hug, your arms trembling as you held him, your voice weak, “It’s not simple. I’m not simple. I can’t just turn this off.”
“I know,” he turned his head to kiss the side of your head, “It’s okay, I’m not in a hurry–and I am not leaving, I’m not walking away, I want to be here. I want to take care of you.”
You tilted your head down, burying your face into his neck, humming softly.
“Let me take care of you,” he whispered, “Please.”
“O-okay,” you squeezed him tightly, “but…that might mean some days are like this…and I won’t want you to touch me or talk to me…I mean…the worst days…they are like that…”
“I will just bring you ice cream, and sit on the other side of the couch while we watch your favorite movies,” you could tell he was smiling, “Maybe you’d let me rub your feet, or something at some point.”
“Maybe,” you sighed.
“You won’t have to talk, you won’t have to do anything, and if you want to cry, you can–and if you do want to talk, we can talk all day, all night–and if you want to yell, I’ll let you, if you want to hit things, I’ll hold the pillow–there’s only one thing I won’t let you do.”
You pulled back, your hands wrapping around his neck, into his hair, “What?”
“Believe the lies.”
You tilted your head, taking in the sincerity of his expression, the way love flowed so clearly from his eyes, and you couldn’t help it. Somehow you knew in your heart that all of his words were truth–that he meant what he was saying, and that the words you kept saying to yourself were horrible lies. It was a moment of clarity.
“I will need reminding,” you admitted, cautiously, never having told anyone other than your mom about these feelings, about these thoughts.
“I’ll remind you as many times as you need.”
He leaned forward, kissing you gently, his lips soft and tender on your own, and then he drew back, the smallest amount, his hands holding you close, “I will always be here to remind you.”
You smiled, pulling him back into you, your mind trying to wrap around the way his words were threading through your heart, realizing that he really meant what he was saying. 
He would always be there to remind you.
I can live with that.
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Headcanons
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Kei:
Kei would reference to a lot of his insecurities of not being as strong in some areas as others. I think he would have liked to be in the back a lot of times. He loved his job, and he loved his group. He would feel like the reason he wasn’t as popular as the others would be because of how he looked mostly. As he grew up, he realized that it was okay to go at your own pace, to find your strengths and admit your weaknesses and ask for help. I think he is a learner, and would watch others to learn how to handle himself.
He would be super squishy, he’d hold you and touch you and want to even just have a pinkie finger on you if he could. He would respect your boundaries when they revealed themselves, but that would just make him all the more clingy and needy when you were back to normal again. He would have a REALLY hard time on days you didn’t want him to touch you admittedly. He’d be fine with you staying in, he’d let you heal at your own pace. 
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Kota: 
He would most certainly reference his height and weight, something others might admire, he felt like it often made him stand out in a negative way. That was particularly hard on him when the younger “chibi” idols got so much attention. He knew he had power in his voice, but he would lack confidence in his appearance. As he grew up, he came to appreciate his appearance and height as something that made him stand out instead of blending in–actually embracing it and finding value in it.
He would be very soft and his voice would be nearly child-like. He would want a lot of direct eye contact, and he would also pay attention to other details like what you were eating. He would be very observant, hoping to catch you before you drifted into a dark place. He would be super attentive, and while he wouldn’t let you stay inside all the time, he would only take you to places he knew would not overwhelm you.
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Daiki:
He would be all about his height, all about being so short, about being called chibi and about how everyone around him grew to look like men but he just stayed the same, ever a 16 year old version of himself. Of course, as an adult, he values this much differently than he did when he was growing up, but it would most certainly be something that he would have struggled with and sometimes no doubt still does. It would be healing for both of you to talk this through. He would also realized that he needed to pay attention to things. That is also a positive thing.
He would literally crawl onto the couch with you, curl up behind you, and hold you for as long as you’d let him. He’d feed you when you didn’t want to eat, and he’d come up with elaborate disguises for you when you didn’t want to be seen in public but he’d insist that you get out of the house now and again. He would also continue to talk to your mom about this, though he would not lie or mislead you about it.
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Hikaru: 
He would not have been super concerned about thing until he reached his teenage years, and then he would have been very self-conscious about his teeth despite always saying it was one of his “charm” points. He would have also felt a little bit of embarrassment that he didn’t grow up in the same environment it seemed like others did and he often felt stupid or undervalued because of it. As he grew up, he realized that it was the things that made him different that made him a good idol. He also realized, as he observed others, that EVERYONE deals with their own insecurities, and it was nice to share those with trusted friends now and again.
He would literally pick you up and hold you in his arms like a child. He would flutter soft kisses and he would give you plenty of time to talk. He would bring you stupid gifts and stuffed animals and things to make you laugh. He would send you video chats when he couldn’t be there, and he would ask you every day to tell him how you were feeling. He would double, triple, quadruple his words, wanting to fill up your mind with good thoughts and emotions about yourself to outweigh the negative. He would also encourage you to do yoga and such, and research natural supplements that might help you heal.
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Yuya:
Yuya absolutely had very few issues with his physical appearance, but he struggled in a major way with the way he viewed the world, and his place in it. Despite wanting to be an idol, he often felt like his heart wasn’t in it, something that set him apart in a negative way from the other idols who seemed to be all in all of the time. He would have went back and forth with his value as an entertainer, as a member of Jump, and thought about quitting  A LOT. As he grew up, he realized that there are stages of life, and while he’s young it’s good to take hold of the things that you can do while you’re young–and that there will be time for all of the adventures he could find.
He would force you back so he could hold you closely right there on the couch. Moving forward he would write you a note every day, and he would insist that you write him back, no matter how busy you two were. He would pay close attention to you and your habits, making note of what you were eating, how much you were exercising an such to see if any of those things were effecting your mood. He would be ridiculously patient, and would never force you out of the house.
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BONUS: 7
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Keito:
No one could have struggled with more insecurities than this precious soul. He would reveal them all, he’d spend three or four days telling you every single thought he’d ever had, and he would cry with you, he’d sob and hold you and between the two of you eventually you’d both agree that you both needed to fix the way you viewed yourselves and you also would promise to remind one another daily as he still struggles sometimes with this very issue.
He would not mind if you only left your house to come to his. He would, at least for a time, want to be with you 24/7 and would be as long as he could. He would bring you magazines and books to read, and he would also engage you into shows and programs he enjoyed. More than anything he would share his extensive love for music by sending you a new song every single day to cheer you up.
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Yuri:
He would of course reveal the undeniable truth that he struggles with insecurities and fears even though he always presents himself as the opposite. He would tell you how self-conscious he is, how he doesn’t want to be near people and it makes him incredibly worried. How he works himself into a frenzy of anticipation and fear when he has to do anything without another member of Jump with him. How he feel so awkward and uncomfortable on sets of shows and programs and interviews and how the only thing that calms him down now that he’s grown up is YOU.
He would drag you out of the house, not forcing you around a lot of people but taking you to the park, to the zoo, to the beach. He’d tell you sunshine and movement would help you. He’d plan picnics in the spring, and he’d take you ice skating in the winter. He’d be very affectionate, and most of the healing that would happen between the two of you would be literal silence.
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Yuto:
Oh gosh, let’s be honest, he’s got his own encyclopedia of issues without a doubt, all of which he would reveal to you very openly, honestly, and freely. He’d be very proactive in helping you, researching and studying all aspects of depression and determining ways that he could help you. He would be very attentive to you, but he also would refuse to become a crutch. He’d want you to stand on your own two feet, and so he’d be very careful with how he handled your emotions so that your healing would come from inside you and not from him. It’s not a bad thing, it’s just different than most.
He would be very soft to you, his words and manners would be very gentle, but at the same time, he’d have times where he’d just stare at you like you were crazy and tell you to snap out of it. Not in a mean or degrading or negative way, but just in the way of saying “I’m right here, I’m listening, stop feeling like you’re alone!”
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Ryosuke:
Ah, our Ace, the boy who seems to have it all. He struggles with enough insecurities and self-hatred for the entire world. He would readily admit to you all of his flaws, and once he’d had you furious with how stupid he was to see himself so clearly, he would quite literally point at you and say “Pot meet Kettle!”* The two of you would be committed to saying one thing you liked about yourselves to the other every day, and if either of you said something negative about yourself then you’d have to say three things that you loved about yourself, no exceptions. He would write notes to you of encouragement, and would send you cute things all the time as a surprise, but all of them would always be related to something you’d discussed in one way or another. He would always include a note explaining how the gift applied to the topic. 
Lord, he would be like a human blanket 24/7. He would be very affectionate. At the same time, on the days when you didn’t want to be touched, he would have deep respect for that, and settle for feeding you your favorite foods or treats that he made for you. He would constantly be coming up with new ways to make you smile, new ways to make sure you knew how much he loves you, and more than anything, he’d be very proactive in helping you find hobbies, activities, and such that would promote a happy, whole feeling in you. He would also encourage you to go to counseling, AND to take meds if necessary. He would remind you daily if you’ve taken them, and he would drive you to your appointments. He would be careful to not push you, but he would also be very clear that your well-being is intricately entwined with his own, and when you don’t take care of you, it hurts him. You would obviously be more than clear that this was a two-way street.
*I realize this might be an American idiom which others may not understand. The meaning of the phrase is said to have come from lots of sources, but the one I trust the most is from an early issue of St. Nicholas Magazine from 1876:
"Oho!" said the pot to the kettle;"You are dirty and ugly and black!Sure no one would think you were metal,Except when you're given a crack."
"Not so! not so!" kettle said to the pot;"'Tis your own dirty image you see;For I am so clean – without blemish or blot –That your blackness is mirrored in me.
It is literally referring to the fact that the person who is pointing out the reason others were wrong or broken in their way of thinking is just as guilty of the same flawed thought process.
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sunseteyes · 4 years
Text
THE RED ROSES IN WONDERLAND; T. KAMADO
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theme/s: alice in wonderland & brave inspired. a beginning; where the child of the red king meets the one that is fated to bring peace in the land. 
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word count: 1,957 words
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roze’s note: i suddenly wanted to write this as a multi-chapter but let’s see~ if my schedule permits it, why not? also, what do you think? should i really??
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a sigh leaves your lips as your eyes glances over the same flowers every single day. yes, the flowers were indeed beautiful, but whenever you see the color red, you just can't help but feel that coiling of your stomach and the tightening in your throat.
everyone thinks you don't know of the blood that spills on your father's hands, but you do, and you're only pretending you don't.
just as you were about to turn back to the house, a figure catches your attention and you immediately recognized who it was.
"nosuke! you're back!" your mood brightened immediately at the only one whom you could call a friend in the whole land. despite being surrounded by lots of individuals and loyal subjects, your guard is still always up and you never full trusted all of them—except inosuke.
it was explainable though. he's the only one who is not entirely by your father's side but he can still manage to stay alive. as the record keeper of wonderland, inosuke the white rabbit is more like the neutral individual. he doesn't have a side to pick on and that's why you don't have a problem opening up to him at all.
"how was your travel to the other side? did you bring a souvenir for me?" you excitedly approached the boy and his ears twitched at the sound of your voice, his head turning around to face you with his beautiful face that you sometimes envy upon. he's probably the prettiest you'd ever seen in the whole land!—as if you'd seen everyone yet. you never got to get out much aside from the forest because your father insists that you must stay safe and not act hostile because you are a royal, the future ruler of the reds, after him.
you didn't want to adapt your father's way of ruling but you can't also say no to him. it's not that you were afraid but mostly because you love him too much to hurt him. he raised you with the outmost care and compassion he could give. the only thing you could give back to him is by abiding in his rules and obeying him by following his footsteps.
but you can't kill anyone either.
"huh? souvenir? i was there for work, you know! you can't just order me to do something when i've got other things to do." you smiled at inosuke's response. harsh as it may seem to others, you know it was his way of conversing to someone he doesn't particularly call his "minion". he can be a bit superior against others but it's what you admire most in your friend.
"wait, inosuke. i heard you brought someone from the other side. is that true?"
your question seemed to have made him tense for a second but it vanished as soon as it came. you realized then that it must have been the same question your father might have asked him that's why the rabbit was summoned there.
"you mean gonpachiro? he's not going to stay here for long. the portal will open a week after, there's no need to worry about the legend."
ah, so that's what it is, you thought.
there's a legend in wonderland that there will come a time that someone from "the other side" will come and give a path to peace between the white and the red, making the land as one as it can be. looking at it now, many have lost hope that the legend was not even often said anymore. yet, it is also a fear for others, especially the royals since peace will result to a singular leadeship.
it's either one will back down and give way so the other will rule all over wonderland, or one will have to fall in misery as the other rises in victory,
either way, you're sure your father will never like the idea of that unless he will be the ruler.
"i'm not worried about the legend." you say, looking up a inosuke's eyes. "i'm more worried about this gonpachiro you're talking about. you know how my father works."
inosuke's lips seals tight at your words. you have kept from everyone aside from inosuke about your knowledge of your father's dirty works but until now, inosuke seems bothered about it.
now you don't really socialize with the others in your household much and you usually keep your distant most of the time. one of the main reasons why was because of your father—he often tells you never to trust anyone, including the ones that are loyal to them. you agreed in his logic for the reason that his loyal subjects are the ones that obeys his orders and has the capability of killing anyone. you never liked that idea, even if you don't show or tell it to others, especially your father. he'd be very disappointed if that so happens.
this results to a lot of free time for yourself. with an idea you got from the back of your head, you begun to imitate how your father's loyal subjects often train around the palace.
by training, it meant drawing a weapon and using it constantly for you to get used to it. at first, you thought of it as something you do in your past time. however as moments passes by and more killings were done in the red kingdom, you decided it was for your own safety. you never know when time will come when someone tries to avenge their lost loved one because of your father. as the only heir to the throne and the ones that carries the king's own blood, you will surely be the best prey for a predator.
drawing back your arm, narrowing your eyes and casting a breath, you let go of the tail of the arrow, watching it hit the target whilst quickly reaching for another one and repeat the process.
eleven years. it took eleven years for you to master the art of archery.
at first, you tried with knives, swords and even a fan—which was the weapon of one of your father's loyal subjects. yet, the bow and arrows were the only ones you had gotten a connection too. thus, it served you as your main weapon that you had learned throughout the years without any guidance from anyone.
your father didn't like the idea of you fighting for your own. even if you had kept your training a secret all these years. you had a feeling he knows about it and he was either already pleased about it or he's too disappointed that you were keeping it a secret that he wants you to confess it to him instead of confronting you.
your hair flutters under the influence of the wind as you balanced on your horse, already used to its movement and shifts as he glides through the trees of the forest.
you locked your eyes on a target however as you shot the arrow, a figure catches your attention and it was too late.
"look out!"
you were quite sure that the figure was so a hair-strand away from getting hit yet it dodges, the arrow marking a perfect score on the target on a tree trunk.
you halted your horse and ushers it towards the figure's way, your mind failing to recognize what it was.
"who are you?" you made eye contact with the boy, the crimson in his hair resonating his orbs that were certainly of a different hues than your father and the roses in your garden.
he looks... different. far too unique from the people in the palace.
"how did you gain access in here? from what i remember i told everyone that only i should be of use of the forest." your brows furrow at the sight of him, your guard up just in case he will try something.
although, his face displayed of a gentleness that you had not seen for the longest time—was there ever been a moment, even? that you don't know. from what you can recall, everyone only respected you because of your title.
not because of you yourself.
"don't be alarmed! i bring you no harm, your highness!" he raises both of his hands up as a sign of surrender, his voice tainted of assurance and calmness that no burglar or man with ill-intention would have.
you still refuse to trust him.
"how will i know of your claims?" your grip on your bow tightens, prepared of any kind of attack. "what's your name, stranger?"
he seems to be at ease with your questioning, making you curious even further.
"i am tanjiro kamado. i... the white rabbit and the mad hatter sent me here. he thought i could be of help to you, your highness."
"help? why would i need that?"
then inosuke and zenitsu? why would they send this boy without telling it to you beforehand?
"you need to know what the red king is doing. he needs to be stopped. inosuke told me only you are capable to do that."
"i already know of my father's schemes." your lips tighten in your words, being the second time to have told your secret, you were beginning to think it was a wrong move.
the boy named tanjiro looked surprised, betrayed even. could it be that inosuke lied to him? you guesses that might not be the case.
"you mean... you know that he's planning to start a war against the white kingdom...?" there was hope and uncertainty in his voice, a mixture that you had deemed obvious with how he toned it. however, it was least of your worries for his words had processed in your mind first.
a war? now that you don't know about.
"where have you gotten this idea?" you question him further. "i... i never heard of that."
he seems to have perked up at your last statement, his aura changing in a millisecond.
"muzan learned of my coming here. you know of the legend, right? i didn't know if it at first but i was warned that my arrival would cause great chaos in this world." it had been awhile since you've heard someone use your father's name.
that fact alone changed your perspective on the boy.
climbing down your horse, your garments sticking to your skin as the slight formation of the sweat from your training. without letting go of your bow, you stood in front of tanjiro, feeling like the world had stopped at how you were feeling the beginning of change in you and your household.
looking straight into his eyes, you spoke.
"yes, that is a fact." you scanned his face and found a genuineness that you were not used of seeing as a result of being in a place with people that wore a firm and strict expression constantly. you were getting tired of it.
wait, no. you are tired of it.
"but your coming here is a sign of hope." your muscles eases up at how you let it out all in one go, "you will be the source of peace in wonderland, tanjiro kamado."
all your teenage years you spent on being silent. now that you were getting close to your coronation, it is time to show everyone what is needed to be done,
and with this boy in front of you, you felt as if the coil in your stomach contort back and relax, a ray of light showing you the path that you should take in order for you to succeed in stopping your own father from destroying the land you call home and the king that has the same blood that runs in your veins.
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